#effe the elf

[time-to-write-and-suffer]

WIP Intros

Here’s a list of all my current writing works-in-progress, under a cut so I can change the post as I inevitably drop some things and start others. If you don’t see a particular WIP here that you’ve seen me talk about, it’s probably because I either abandoned it for now/for good or I haven’t worked on it enough -- in general or recently -- to justify mentioning it.

All of my current projects are intended for adult audiences even though they’re rarely explicit.

Feel free to send me asks if you want to know more!

Faery WIP / The Overgrowth / These Dark and Lovely Woods

After her mother’s passing, Sidra Carver has become a shell of a person, living alone in the woods away from society. Her remaining joy is her stepsister, the kind and bright Sinéad, whose love keeps Sidra from losing herself to the forest. That changes when Sinéad is violently stolen by her own fiancé, the mysterious Lord Thorne. A spell forces everyone but Sidra to forget Sinéad’s very existence, making Sidra the only one willing and capable of traveling beyond the iron wall and into the dangerous lands of the fae. But two axes and a brutal temper won’t be enough to help Sidra deal with the prideful and vindictive fae without falling prey to their ruthless politics.To navigate their machinations without losing her life, Sidra needs help from one of their own. Enter Valerien, a gorgeous but unpleasant fae who binds Sidra with an oath in exchange for his aid. But what this promise entails, and why he’s forced to live isolated in a crumbling manor, remains a mystery. One thing is clear: Sidra and Valerien cannot stand each other. As they struggle to reconcile their differences — and similarities — their animosity threatens to tear the alliance apart, and doom Sinéad to a life of slavery in a court of beautiful vultures.

Genre: Dark fantasy, romance

Status: Querying first book, outlining second

Word count: 119k words (first book)

Style: Single first person POV, past tense

Inspiration/vibe: Howl’s Moving Castle but it has depression

Keywords: Slow-Burn, Teeth-Clenched Teamwork, Mayfly-December Romance, Belligirent Sexual Tension, Forbidden Romance, Fae, Loneliness, Curses, Interspecies Romance

Tag / Dedicated blog / Art / Masterpost / PowerPoint / Inspiration tag / Pinterest board

Cyborg WIP / Princess Machine

The Royal Roulette is a sham, and Kit Sullivan, your local downtrodden cyborg janitor, knows this. Yet she has no choice but to compete when her mother buys her a lottery ticket and she gets picked as one of twelve contestants on national TV. She and eleven other girls will live in luxury with the charming Prince Rhett, whose heart they must win to become the princess of Astria. But Kit knows things aren't as simple as they seem, and when feelings clash with politics, love becomes a weapon of rebellion.

Genre: Romance, dramedy, sci-fi

Status: 4th draft in progress

Current word count: 45k

Style: Single first person POV, present tense

Inspiration/vibe: The Bachelor but sad

Keywords: Slow-Burn, Rags to Riches, Reality TV, Social Media, Surveillance, Propaganda, Dark Humor, Royalty, Poverty, Power Dynamics, Inter-Class Romance

Tag / Pinterest board

Dragon WIP

Kestrel, the nation's most powerful mage, is a bastard princess. When she's forced into an arranged marriage to her first cousin, she has no other option but to plan an epic escape. Her accomplice? A beautiful dragon man by the name of Falk, who should be the enemy, but becomes her only ally. Despite centuries of bad blood between their people, Kestrel soon realizes that her fascination with Falk is not purely scientific, and might be a little more mutual than she expected. But when Kestrel travels to the Dragon Isles, the other dragons aren’t as enthusiastic about her as Falk is. As their feelings grow, so does the pressure and threats of violence, particularly from Falk’s human-hating grandfather, the head of the Fire Clan. But it’s all right! If things get too hot, Kestrel can just blow it all up with her epic magic! Right?

Genre: Fantasy, romance, comedy

Status: 1st draft in progress

Current word count: 38k

Style: Single first person POV, past tense

Inspiration/vibe: Romeo and Juliet but it's a dragon and a wizard and nobody (important) dies

Keywords: Interspecies Romance, Princess/Dragon, Unlikable Female Protagonist, Rebellious Princess, Young Love Versus Old Hate, Forbidden Romance, Bonding, Shared Interests, Fluff, Dragon Hoards, Magic is Science

Tag / The “cover art” I made recently

Elf Marriage WIP / Nettle and Song

To strengthen the new alliance between the nations of elves and humans, the elven prince Androel and the human not-quite-princess Theodosia are reluctantly convinced to marry. But their begrudging acceptance of their circumstances is not enough to make them like each other. Trust is difficult when they both carry a secret the other cannot know: Teddy is the champion of a goddess, made to suppress her magic lest she threaten her step-father's rule, while Roel struggles with a desperate thirst for Teddy's blood.

Genre: High fantasy, romance, drama

Status: 1st draft in progress

Current word count: 38k

Style: Dual third person limited POV, past tense

Inspiration/vibe: If Pride and Prejudice was set in Middle Earth, and also there's sexy vampire elves

Keywords: Arranged Marriage, Marriage Before Romance, Slow-Burn, Elves, Interspecies Romance, Defrosting Ice King, Garden of Love, There Was Only One Bed, Royals Who Actually Do Something, Fluff, Angst, Healing from Trauma, Low Stakes

Tag

I also write a canon rewrite fic for The W@yhaven Chr0nicles but I will not link that here.

[jerzwriter]

I used to hate doing elf on the shelf but I guess now I can only be grateful that I don't have to do it in times where people are giving him OUTFIT CHANGES AND USING PROPS FOR DIFFERENT ACTIVITIES LIKE ????

😂

GGGIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!

If people were doing the crazy they're doing now when my kid was little, I would have had to say I was allergic to elves.

It was enough to remember to move that little f-er every day and do SOMETHING somewhat cute. I would like sit him on the fridge, hang him upside down from the chandelier, and put him in a teacup.

If I had to do the crap people do now... no.... no way.... there are no meds in this world that could have kept me stable enough if I had to add that to my daily regimen. 😂😂😂

I'm so glad I'm not alone.

[giverofempathy]

hele trein leeg en precies naast mij gaan twee van die schreeuw tieners zitten. SHUT UP !!!! NIET ZO GILLEEENNNNNNN JE ZIT ZO DICHTBIJ ELKAAR NIET IEDEREEN WIL JE GESPREK HOREN

[eglerieth]

Some of y’all are not appreciating Bilbo Baggins enough. I am here to remedy that. This guy has:

• somehow managed to establish himself as a respectable, staid hobbit by the time he was fifty, despite being both a grandson of Bullroarer Took and the Shire champion of pretty much every aiming-game known to hobbitkind

• had an in-depth debate on pleasantries with a random guy passing by in the street, who turned out to be GANDALF

• collapsed in front of his own fire shaking and muttering “struck by lightning” over and over again in response to hearing about dragons and danger

• mind you, this was after he screamed loud enough to startle a roomful of Dwarves

• signed up for a dangerous quest completely outside of his league out of spite

• when told to scout out a mysterious light, saw some trolls, and instead of reporting back with the information, decided to PICK THE TROLLS POCKET

• arrived in Rivendell for the first time and said it “smelled like elves”

• upon meeting a strange creature that visibly wanted to eat him, he decided to play a riddle game with him- and guessed pretty much every one, and made up his own riddles, afraid and alone, that not only were good and full of linguistic puns, but actually stumped the other guy- AND THEN CHEATED AND WON WITH A QUESTION

• showed mercy to said strange creature who wanted to kill him, and was now standing between him and freedom

• eavesdropped on the dwarves arguing over whether to try to save him, then popped up casually smack in the middle of them just as they were debating

• somehow managed to sleep like a log at the really really high eyrie full of wild predators

• found himself in a bad situation, said eff it, and turned around and antagonized and fought off an insane amount of man eating spiders, like enough of them that fifty was a small portion, by singing at them with incredibly complex and punny insulting songs composed on the spot, while simultaneously slaying them in multitudes despite having zero combat training. Seriously, we don’t discuss enough how epic the spider scene is.

• broke a company of dwarves out of the very secure prison of the Elvenking by inventing white water rafting with barrels

• charmed his way out of being eaten by a dragon

• stole the frickin Arkenstone from the guys who employed him, one of whom was a king

• took part in an epic battle, only to be knocked out in the first ten minutes and miss the entire thing

• was named elf-friend by the guy who’s prisoners he sprung

• wrote his own autobiography, complete with all the narrative recognition of his own heroics

• spent 60 years writing said autobiography

• taught his lower class neighbor’s kid how to read

• taught his nephew Elvish- not only Sindarin, but Quenya too

• spent decades telling his cousins his own story as fairy tales, complete with character impressions accurate enough that one of them was able to fool a servant of the Enemy with a second hand impression

• used the One Ring of Power to hide from his neighbors

• planned an elaborate feast with multiple social faux pas to mess with his neighbors, complete with a purposefully bewildering speech and culminating in him vanishing into thin air in front of everyone

• left his cousins and neighbors very unsubtle passive aggressive gifts in his will

• settled into Rivendell, randomly befriended the heir to the throne of like half of Middle Earth, and apparently spent his time writing very personal poems about his hosts and reciting them to crowds of elves

• after being invited to a Council of basically every major kingdom in the continent, spent a quarter of the time reciting vague poems about his friends, a quarter of the time telling anyone who would listen about his heroic past, and half the time interrupting to ask when lunch would be

• volunteered to bring the ring to Mordor

• became one of only four or five mortals in history to live in Valinor

Seriously, Bilbo Baggins may well be the most chaotic, insane person in the entire legendarium, and that includes the likes of people like Finrod “bit a werewolf to death to save the life of guy who he just met and gave up his kingdom for” Felagund.

[missuswalker]

Kyle dating hc's pleaaaaase 🧎🏼‍♀️🧎🏼‍♀️🧎🏼‍♀️

meow meow meow 🤭🤭

relationship headcannons || kyle broflovski x fem reader

✮ summary: kyle as your boyfreind ✮ warnings: i was gonna do what i did for the clyde one but changed my mind, so nsfw content, reminder that characters are aged up (i'm too much of a kyle girl to pass up the oppurtunity)

sfw

before ya'll started dating he did your homework for you as a rizz tactic

he thought it would make you want him

turns out you wanted him even before he started doing your homework, so he starts making you do it yourself

but kyle would do anything for you, so if you ask him with that pretty face of yours, he'll do it anyways

ya'll had a long "are we dating are we not phase"

he's been screwed over so many times that he wanted to make sure you were the one

you definitely were

after much convincing from stan and a couple hundred "no balls, you wont"s from cartman, kyle finally asks to be his gee-eff (girlfriend)

over text in your instagram dms

LOOK, HE WAS TOO NERVOUS TO DO IT IN PERSON

he did it very romantically though

loooooooong paragraph about how much he likes you and wants you to be all his

ends it with "And I know you piss me off sometimes, but I think I could really make us work."

as SOON as you say yes

"Come over. You have my address."

anyways, moving on, he acts like he thinks pet names are cringe, but he can't help but call you that goody goody shit like "angel"

do you hear purring? sorry

anyways, he spoils you to death, like what was in my love language hcs

"oh wow that's so cute" "what color do you want it in" "kyle 😟"

loooves when you wear his boxer shorts around his house, he thinks he's THE man when you do

his mom likes to talk to him about embarrassing things in front of you to mess with him

"hi boobala, your spiderman underwear is fresh out of the dryer 🥰" "ma, that's ikes, get out 😡😡😡😨😰"

when you guys cuddle, he puts his hand up your shirt and rubs your back

he has cold ass hands though

kisses the top of your head all the time

he's like 6'2 so if you're shorter than him he's all like "aww elf 😻😻" when in reality he's just tall

nsfw

WOOF WOOF WOOF AWOOOOO

damn

first time he was suuuuuper sweet and gentle

after that he puts his temper into it

its like theres an earth quake from the bed rocking

ike ain't a snitch though 🤐

he is rough, hoowee

grunts, huffs, groans

all the good shit

probably says some good girl shit at some point

if he's actually upset, he rather you take control

lets you do whatever you want and whimpers

he whines yall

but if cartman pissed him off, its not the same

has you in doggy style and goes WILD

he don't care if you're screaming

yeah he does, when he's finished he STRESSES about sheila

"dude, you were fucking rabid, i'm so fucked 😰😰"

sheila side eyes him at breakfast but doesn't say anything

makes gerald give him the talk

gerald makes randy give him the talk

randy informs him of new positions

someone on wattpad said "jew in the streets, freak in the sheets"

[darsynia]

66. a kiss only meant to last a moment, but when your lips meet, you can't pull away from each other

With Tony Stark please (I love him 😍❤️)

Okay I really enjoyed writing this, and PREDICTABLY it ended up longer than I thought... Thank you for my very first fic ask!! 💚😍

Summary: You're only at the party because your friend needed a +1, but Tony Stark's parties are legendary... Warnings: none Pairings: Tony Stark x Reader Square Filled: 'Soft Under Hard Exterior' Trope Word Count: 1,409 A/N: @avengersbingo

If anyone would like to be on a taglist (when I don't eff up and post before I tag anyone, that is), please don't hesitate to ask!

PLUS ONE

Attending Tony Stark’s 40+1 birthday bash is not what you’d been planning to do when you came to L.A.

It’s actually a complete fluke. You are really only in town to celebrate your best friend’s casting in a really promising pilot, one that catapulted her into a fancier sphere of influence, and earned her an invite to this thing. Except, Stark has decided to go full-out as usual, and every single person who is invited is required to bring a +1.

A female +1.

As it turns out, everyone your midwestern, level-headed, best friend since childhood actually trusts not to ruin this new chance of hers is already invited. So, she’s dressed you up in the most gorgeous, most revealing black dress you’ve ever worn, and dragged you along. 

You and your best friend step onto the property with stars in your eyes, and the first person you meet is Stark himself. Well, sort of. He’s wearing a custom-made birthday hat that’s almost certainly modeled after Madonna’s pointy-boob bra era, and he’s got a bucket full of wristbands that he’s distributing.

It seems that every +1 gets a wristband saying she’s a +1.

The closer the line gets to Stark, the more nervous you are. Finally, you balk.  “Okay, well, dressing up and seeing the house was enough for me, I’ll call a cab and--”

“I heard that. Call Patrol, we’ve got an escape in progress!” Stark says loudly, looking around to find out who’d been speaking. Like an actual tv show, everyone turned and looked at you. “You. You’re scared of me?”

“I’m scared of the idea of you. I have no idea what you’re really like,” you say, without thinking.

The regular flow of party talk resumes around you, but Stark cocks his head to the side and looks, really looks at you, and then he dips his hand into a bucket, pointing at you with his other hand.

“Who’re you with?”

Bestie has been nudging you with her bony elbow so often you probably have marks, and somehow after three minutes, you’re inside with your bracelets. The decor is ‘tropical Christmas,’ which is baffling until your friend’s bracelet goes off right by the bar.

A handsome man turns around, grins, and points up.

There’s mistletoe hanging from the ceiling.

Bestie actually knows the guy, he’s another aspiring actor, so they share a quick smooch before you and she retreat to a far wall to figure out what the heck is going on. That’s when you realize Stark’s swapped the bracelets. You’re wearing one that says ‘Stark’s Elf,’ and she’s wearing one that says ‘+1.’ As you watch the crowd, it’s immediately apparent that the ‘+1’ bracelets light up and chime when they’re near the mistletoe, and it’s everywhere.

“Okay, this is good actually,” your friend declares. “You’d have to be carted out of here by ambulance, and that’s not what either of us need right now.” 

You give her a hug right then, because she’s right. A few kisses you’d have been cool with, but this is a chiming, blinking assembly line. At least the noises aren’t irritating… yet? 

“Mind if I go, uh, network for a little bit?”

“Not at all,” you say, holding up the drink you just obtained.

An hour or so later, you’re happy for her, happy for yourself, and most of all, you’re oddly charmed by Stark’s selfish thoughtfulness. You’d always thought of him as a hard-nosed playboy, and he probably is, but there’s something else there, something kind, soft, even. He’d seen your reticence and given you an out (though again, he could have given you both ‘Elf’ bracelets, so there’s only so much credit to give the guy).

Speaking of an ‘out,’ you need the restroom, so you ask around. The staff member looks at your bracelet and directs you through a door, down a hallway, and around a corner.

On the way back, you pause at the corner to fix the strappy shoe you’d borrowed from your friend, your clutch under an arm, one hand on the wall, one hand on the sandal. Predictably, the bag succumbs to gravity.

You take one look at your neckline, another look at your hemline, and bite your lip.

“That’s a ‘don’t drop anything’ dress, right there,” Stark says, coming out of a door you hadn’t seen.

The alcohol in your system responds with, “Yeah, I might need rescuing, here.”

The lighting in the hallway is dim, but you can still see that his grin is on the sexy side of predatory as he says, “I’m happy to oblige, but I might need proper compensation.” When Stark gets close, he shoots a look up at the ceiling, then gives you a thorough once-over. “You’re the one I placated with the regular bracelet.” He takes a step back and puts his hands in his pockets. “Well, go on, Alice. Back to Wonderland.”

Something’s off, and when you glance up, you see why.

You’re standing under mistletoe.

Again, you’re charmed. This man has set up a kiss factory, but one hint that you’re uncomfortable with it, and he’s decided you’re off limits. Except, he is handsome as hell, smells amazing, and you’re just tipsy enough to be disappointed.

“I don’t recall there being anything in the universal law of mistletoe about a bracelet requirement.”

His gaze sharpens, but Stark says, “That’s the alcohol talking.”

“I nursed a single drink for an hour.” You bite your lip at the thing you just thought up to say, but go for it anyway. “You can see if you can taste it on me, if you think I’m lying.”

“The universal law of consent says that kiss shouldn’t be long enough to tell,” he shoots back. Your eyebrows shoot skyward, and he rolls his eyes. “Hard and fast rule by the party organizer. I maybe should have thought about whether the open bar would ruin all my fun.” He steps closer, inches away. “Last chance, Alice.”

“You haven’t picked up my bag yet,” you point out, heart pounding.

He doesn’t move back as he sinks down, and when he stands again, he holds the clutch close enough to your body that it takes your skirt up with it for a little while. Stark hands it over, then reaches out to hold your chin steady, obviously meaning to drop an insolent, brief kiss on you.

Except, that’s not what happens.

As soon as your lips touch, his hand spasms on your face, and you grab at his lapel, despite yourself. It’s electric, intoxicating, the chemical formula for lust just spontaneously generating between two strangers. 

Stark angles his head and murmurs, against your lips, “No, sorry, gonna need another five to ten--” and doesn’t even finish before he’s sliding the hand on your chin up into your hair and licking into your mouth. He’s more potent than any drink you’ve ever tasted, and he knows how to use his body to persuade, so it’s not long before you’re up against the wall and he’s got a handful of your skirt. Somehow Stark figures out everything you like in seconds, and the deep little chuckle he lets out when you moan in encouragement is as sexy as it is devastating.

It’s only the sound of someone else in the adjoining hallway that breaks the two of you apart, but again, Stark’s generous, offering his arm for balance as you gather yourself.

“And here, I thought I’d given you the wrong wristband,” he teases, picking up your clutch from where it had fallen righteously onto the floor during those frantic few moments.

Two weeks later, when you’re back at home and checking your email, you notice one from Stark Industries, and have a mini freak out before you open it. No one had said anything about giving the bracelets back, but maybe you should have done a little more due diligence?

The subject line is ‘CLICK ME,’ and you shake your head in disbelief. If you didn’t know better, you’d think that’s related to Stark’s repeated allusions to you as Alice in Wonderland…

The body of the email sends shivers down your spine.

Alice,

I thought about it, and I definitely gave you the correct bracelet, so here’s Stark’s Erotic Lust Follow-up: just so happens I’m giving a tech speech in your neck of the woods next month.

Dinner?

It’s signed the Knave of Hearts.

[funky-sea-cryptid]

I was wondering, do you have any other lesbian headcanons other than Finral

vanessa (trans lesbian)

mimosa

kahono

mereoleona

princia (lol)

fana (elf)

charla (elves do not have a concept of gender but they count i think)

finesse

dazu and bow (devil believers gee effs)

im sure there's more but i got off work recently so head's kinda full rn "u_u

[vibingandsimping]

ooooh can I have a bg3 match up? I love these!! I'm 27 straight/ demisexual woman, 5 ft, freckles, waist length dirty blonde hair and green eyes. I'm v feminine, I like wearing my cute sweaters and jeans, and my boots. I like honest people, kind people, people who can stand up for themselves and others. I cannot stand Liars or cheats. Like....the kind of people who will step on someone or something, causing them strife just to get ahead themselves. Like Jeff Bezos for example. Can't stand people like that, greedy and unjust to their employees. Treat others with respect, until they SHOW you that you shouldn't. In which case eff em. I'll go out of my way for the ones I care about, don't get me wrong I'll help someone if I can but if I don't have the time or resources then I'm sorry, you can't pour from an empty cup. But if I care for you, I will be at your doorstep at 3 am if you tell me you need me. I try to be optimistic, but not to the point of being totally delulu that there aren't bad people or things in the world although I do believe there's good in everyone for the most part. Even if it's just a little. In a partner I definitely prefer someone a little more in control, I'm definitely most submissive in a relationship- domestically speaking. As far as sex goes...it really doesn't. I was taken advantage of by a close friend so I'm slow to trust. Another bit of info, I play DND (not bg3- never played) as a tiefling rogue chaotic good alignment

I am also 5’0, dirty blonde with freckles and a demisexual.

I think you’d pair with Halsin!

I believe Halsin would give you a stability in your life. He is a man of justice and consent. He’d follow along with your heroic nature and adore you for it. While he is a man of needs he’d never push anything unto you. It is all of your free will. If you ever feel comfortable with it, he’d be more than happy. As long as that’s what you truly desired.

You slouched by the campfire with elbows atop your knees. The day drew long and tiresome with battle after battle and conflict after conflict. First thing you did returning to camp was tear your armor off and into something more comfortable. Possibly reminiscent of shrugging the weight you carried off your shoulders. You cared about your companions- you truly did. It just became too much to look after all their wellbeing’s while also trying to tie up their loose ends. Who would be there to tie up your loose ends? Who would assist you with your own issues? You huffed in frustration as you used a stick to poke the campfire. The presence of Halsin hadn’t even been acknowledged til his hand cupped your shoulder. You nearly screamed as the object you previously held flew to the side. The elf bore an apologetic grin down at you. Clearly, he hadn’t any visible intention of scaring you. He takes a seat next to you as your heart calms. “Apologies, my heart. I noticed you were upset. What troubles you?” You frowned and shrugged. The last thing you wanted to do was make anyone feel guilty. Halsin wanted to help you but he knew you drew boundaries. He clasped a hand over yours (nearly dwarfing it) and spoke with a sincerity that made your heart ache. “I cannot push you to speak your mind. I want you to know i’ll always be here for you. As you always are with me.” Tears brimmed and you nodded with a lip drawn between your teeth. Even if you didn’t want to talk now- it truly did mean something that he extended the offer. You suddenly felt less alone in these struggles.

[memorycare]

elf urself…..eff…..eff ursOHHH

[imscissorbladez]

@eff-plays wanted to see some Tavs, so Tavs they will have:

ROOK MAGUIRE

Race: Half wood elf, and spent half of the game half illithid too

Class: Bard

Romanced: Astarion

BFF: Shadowheart

Backstory: Local bard looking for greatness gets picked up by illithid on the way out of the pub. General inadequacy issues lead them to chow down on the forbidden gummy bears like there’s no tomorrow! Consequences occur.

One sentence description: Drunken menace to society and the best argument for why Larian should not add the artificer class (neither they nor their boyfriend should be allowed a gun.)

Best thing about them: went through the classically nonbinary experience of thinking they were having a totally normal time with their male friends and then getting propositioned by Gale, Halsin and The Emperor in such quick succession it gave me personal psychic damage.

HAVEN GRIGORE

Race: Human. Kind of.

Class: Wild Magic Sorcerer

Romanced: Hilariously I write fic for her romancing Astarion, which she is!! But she’s also accidentally romancing Lae’zel and there’s no way that will go wrong.

BFF: Lae’zel

Backstory: Outcast and local tavern cook harbouring multiple dark secrets accidentally gets into the middle of the weirdest lesbian sexual tension of all time, then starts manipulating the camp’s manipulator. The Church of Lathander is Not A Fan of her.

One sentence description: Another explosive has entered the camp, but Astarion CAN bite that one.

Best thing about them: I FINALLY FOUND A GLASSES MOD so they will soon look like. They actually should (way shorter hair, and glasses)

[geekysteven]

Accidentally contacted ELF instead of EFF but they also have really creative ways to evade surveillance. I might be trapped in this realm though

[hollowwhisperings]

Feanor the Lapsed Catholic

(forewarning: i was not raised catholic nor am i at all religious. i am an outsider working from cue cards and tinfoil.)

so. Feanor is an effed up elf. he was born exceptional: his birth had somehow killed his immortal mother in what the elves had been promised was [heaven].

so feanor is an unprecedented existence, amongst his peers, the subject of death being some distant history belonging to The Ages of Old. he was BORN an existential crisis.

then his dad gets remarried. except. the valar had made much ado on the spiritual union of marriage, on monogamy and Forever (because elves are, allegedly, immortal). so what does it mean for Miriel, that her soul's promised partner is now joined to another?

i forget whether miriel was consulted on the matter &, regardless of any permission or support from her... FEANOR feels Betrayed and Existential about it all.

but, at least, the greatest promise the valar had offered to the elves who migrated was Light. holy light. eternal light. beautiful light.

except, uh, there's been a Kerfuffle and ONLY YOU, feanor the mere elf, can turn the generators back on! we just need to break your life's work, the symbol of your remaining faith in and love for the valar (& valinor) to do it! btw, we are Demanding, not Asking.

Feanor is entirely disillusioned and his father getting MURDERED (in [heaven]! HOW) tips him right off the ledge of "eff this, you're lying liars who lie" to "you never meant your promises, you could never protect us, you would use us and see us die for your failings". since Feanor is a Living Existential Crisis, he was already questionably sane & no one had precedent to aid him. his only recourse was his own efforts, his own children, his own followers.

this is Not Helpful, it turns out, in a high stress situation without precedent where elves are freaking out and running blind. it is the End of Days, seemingly. anyone whp stands between Feanor's quest to return Light to their world, to seek justice from Melkor, to leave this false promise land for The Elves' True Home?

they must be traitors who remain loyal to those false friends, the valar, the valar who are, to feanor's mind, equal to Melkor in their treachery - all valar are the same to him, by this breaking point. feanor has found the valar equally false and equally treacherous: they killed his mother through negligence, killed his father outright, would kill Feanor and every elf too, probably (Feanor is Disillusioned, Furious and Very Traumatised about Death)!

so Feanor kills and rallies his followers to kill too. everyone ie emotionally, existentially compromised. no one can see past their terror, their outrage, the sudden darkness - it is easier to kill when your "enemy" is facelss, when you are still harbouring some belief that Death Isn't Real in Valinor (other than the eldest elves & the house of Finwe, "dying" is too alien an idea for these elves to truly understand what they are doing &, after these first justifications of violence... later ones become excusable, mayhaps even logical (the deaths at Alqualonde could be made "meaningless" if the True Purpose is abandoned now for fear of further kinslaying, etc).

i find Feanor FASCINATING. he has no rolemodels, no guidance, no one to hold him avcountable. he is a genius working entirely on impulse and outrage and TERROR.

feanor's life could have been a lot less horrible for everyone else if Valinor had Hobbits. i wonder whether Bilbo, Frodo & Sam inspired the elves of Valinor to petition for Therapy Hobbits? i imagine Nienna would be on board with such a scheme.

Or, at the very least, DWARVEN therapy. Legolas, i imagine, would have drafted his first petitions on Dwarven Visitation Right as soon as he first took [boat-building] lessons.

It is a great tragedy that Feanor died before meeting any dwarves. He would fit right in, provided there were high enough ceilings. Dwarves have spent their entire existence as sentient beings being Existential. They have it ingrained within their society. They know death and they know divine disappointment. Yet they know faith and forgiveness too.

But the faith of dwarves goes beyond the knowings of my tinfoil: outsider from religion that i am, the methods of healing from crises of faith or of changing one's means of keeping faith are questions i've never had personal need to address.

i still suspect that the cursed souls of Feanor & (some of) his sons would find healing easier/actually feasible in the Halls of Aule rather than those of Mandos. but that is a fanfic i've not the time to patchwork together.

[positronicpussy]

i sometimes say “what the hell” and “what the eff” (lots of other What Thes in my vocabulary too) and today i accidentally combined them and said “what the elf” and i kinda like that. i kinda wanna keep saying it

[im-just-kinda-here-k]

14, 15, 23, 28, and 37 for the ask game!!

14: definitely shei, I haven't decided how exactly they get their powers, but prolly effed up experiments. As for what is concrete, they do have their severe addiction to painkillers, which they will probably never be able to fix. You see, he can't use his powers without painkillers, since it's painful and pain disrupts his focus, and makes his powers unstable. Bounties pay well enough, so at the very least he wont be at risk of withdrawal. And trust me you doooont want to see them in withdrawal, the pain causes his powers to completely break down and him to revert to a more animalistic state. Very traumatic.

15: sure, when I have the opportunity to. :D

23: vidri was at first, literally just an elf with a British accent. Essentially just a fidget toy for my zoomy brain while I did low-thought activities. Shei's concept used to be a lot simpler, he just had the powers, no edge or story.

28: one would assume shei, but I think lum given training and a reason to kill could eff up anybody anyway. If she trained her psionics for such a purpose, she could stop you dead in your tracks and drill into all your weak points. Good thing she's like 4 and wouldn't hurt a fly

37: shei definitely, if I'm being honest, between their combat style and their addiction, a human form is something they fight every day to have.

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Sun[day] 2 October 1836

9

11 3/4

V

No kiss ready at 10 when Mr. Jubb ca[me] - my a[un]t’s pulse 96 – rath[e]r bet[ter] this morn[in]g? A- [Ann] h[a]d still a

gr[ea]t deal of fev[e]r – h[a]d giv[e]n h[e]r the oth[e]r 2 pills and a saline dr[au]ght at 9 1/2 - if the bow[e]ls n[o]t act[e]d up[on] by 2 p.m.

to s[e]nd to Mr. Jubb’s for so[me]th[in]g to prod[uce] immed[ia]te eff[ec]t – luck[il]y this aft[er]w[ar]ds prov[e]d unnecess[ar]y - Mr. J- [Jubb]

th[ou]ght it n[o]t necess[ar]y to co[me] this ev[enin]g on my a[un]t’s acc[oun]t – h[a]s k[no]wn a lady ta[ke] as lit[tle] nourishm[en]t as my

a[un]t does now, and live 4 y[ea]rs - my a[un]t may contin[ue] so[me] ti[me] – br[eak]f[a]st at 10 1/2 – b[a]ckw[ar]ds and forw[ar]ds w[i]th my

a[un]t or A- [Ann] at 12 1/4 r[ea]d pray[e]rs to my a[un]t and Cooks[o]n and Oddy and the h[ou]sem[ai]d in 1/2 h[ou]r, and sat w[i]th my a[un]t

wh[ile] Oddy din[e]d – r[ea]d now and aft[er]w[ar]ds when w[i]th my a[un]t Rennie’s alphab[e]t of nat[ura]l geog[raph]y  the first

50 p[ages] then b[a]ckw[ar]ds and forw[ar]ds – fr[om] 3 to 5 stood read[in]g the H[alifa]x Guard[ia]n of Sat[urday] partly al[ou]d to A- [Ann]

then in the b[lue] r[oo]m skimm[e]d ov[e]r last night’s Lond[on] pap[e]r - a few min[ute]s w[i]th my a[un]t - then ag[ai]n w[i]th

A- [Ann] ga[ve] her the 5th saline d[rau]ght s[in]ce last night she h[a]d noth[in]g b[u]t 2 cups of tea for br[eak]f[a]st and at 7 h[a]d a lit[tle] veal broth and dry toast w[hi]ch

last she th[ou]ght disagr[ee]d w[i]th h[e]r st[oma]ch - she h[a]s a good deal of fev[e]r ag[ai]n tonight – din[ner] at 7 10/..

in 35 min[ute]s - made tea for A- [Ann]  and coff[ee] for mys[elf] and wr[ote] the ab[ov]e of today till 8 10/.. – ver[y] rainy

morn[in]g and rainy day – so[me] ver[y] heavy show[e]rs in the aft[ernoo]n so that none of the serv[an]ts c[oul]d get to ch[ur]ch –

bef[ore] I h[a]d finish[e]d br[eak]f[a]st this morn[in]g h[a]d Charl[otte] Booth - she ca[me] to ask for a merinos gown, and

want[e]d 2 chemises - the term of her apprenticeship expires on Fri[day] – s[ai]d she sh[oul]d ha[ve] the gown –

she m[u]st do for hers[elf] aft[e]r Xmas - or fr[om] 1 Jan[uar]y next – ga[ve] good advice, and spo[ke] of a lady’s m[ai]d place for

her - £10  a y[ea]r as m[u]ch as she sh[oul]d exp[ec]t at 1st – spo[ke] ver[y] gently to h[e]r - she w[oul]d do wh[a]tev[e]r

I lik[e]d, b[u]t I f[oun]d she w[oul]d rath[e]r ‘be in bus[ine]ss’ than in a lady’s m[ai]d pl[a]ce - Miss Hebden had

told her she w[oul]d ha[ve] to sit up ver[y] late - it end[e]d in my say[in]g I w[a]s g[la]d to ha[ve] f[ou]nd out wh[a]t

she lik[e]d best - my only wish was for her to do well - I w[oul]d therefo[re] gi[ve] up inq[uirin]g for a place, and she

m[u]st consult w[i]th Miss Hebden, and manage for hers[elf] – ask[e]d wh[a]t her gown w[oul]d cost – ans[we]r

ab[ou]t a pound – wh[a]t the chemises? ab[ou]t 5/. - I s[ai]d I th[ou]ght she w[oul]d perh[aps] like best

to provide these th[in]gs for hers[elf], and do for hers[elf] fr[om] this ti[me] (to w[hi]ch she seem[e]d to gi[ve] gl[a]d assent)

and that I therefo[re] begg[e]d she w[oul]d do so, and I ga[ve] her 2 sov[erei]gns for this purp[ose] - I hop[e]d she w[oul]d alw[a]ys

be grateful to Miss Hebden, and nev[e]r calculate pennies and twopences where they were

concern[e]d b[u]t do all she c[oul]d for them - and be sure to please th[e]m - if she d[i]d n[o]t, they w[oul]d do

no mo[re] for her, and th[in]k no mo[re] of her - I s[ai]d she must so contrive as n[o]t to put her fath[e]r

to any exp[ense] – b[u]t must stay w[i]th Miss Hebd[e]n or be here till she g[o]t so[me] place, and as for being

here, there w[a]s no r[oo]m at pres[en]t and I sh[oul]d n[o]t now like her to be here if I w[a]s away (allud[in]g to my

hav[in]g nobod[y] to leave her w[i]th as Mrs. Cookson (I s[ai]d) w[oul]d go away of course, w[i]th Miss W- [Walker] and

mys[elf] - I th[in]k the girl w[a]s pleas[e]d to be thus soon put up[on] her own managem[en]t - I ha[ve] giv[e]n her

a trade - I ha[ve] surely done en[ou]gh - she w[oul]d nev[e]r suit A- [Ann] and me - she w[oul]d rath[e]r be

independ[en]t - I am gl[a]d to ha[ve] g[o]t thus happ[il]y rid of her - and hope she will do well for hers[elf] –

writ[in]g the ab[ov]e till 8 25/.. p.m. then w[e]nt for A-  [Ann] who g[o]t up and ca[me] and lay on the sofa (in h[e]r dress[in]g gown and cloak) in the bl[ue] r[oo]m

she w[oul]d n[o]t ta[ke] tea I h[a]d made for her - I h[a]d my coff[ee] - then whi[le] Oddy g[o]t her supp[e]r sat w[i]th my a[un]t 3/4 h[ou]r till n[ea]r 10, at

w[hi]ch h[ou]r F[ahrenheit] 38° and fair - rainy day w[i]th high wind in the aft[ernoo]n -

[thebeardiswriting]

Sorry @crazyonmain todays dragon comes with a bit of an info dump. Miss @-eff it's not House of Dragons but you might find it amusing as well.

Dunkelzahn is a character from Shadowrun(and Earth Dawn, which I might talk about some other time). Shadowrun is a TTRPG setting that has spun out into novels and video games. It is a dark dystopic cyberpunk urban fantasy world. The players are mercenaries, criminals, and/or idealists who live and work in the dark corners of society.

In it the Mayan calendar wasn't wrong about the world ending, we were just wrong about what that meant. Magic is cyclical and the old world died as the Sixth World was born when the cycle came back around. When magic returned a lot of things happened. Humanity found out what all that junk DNA when the return of magic awakened it. Regular people mutated into Orcs and Trolls, babies began being born as Elves and Dwarfs. Even animals and plants changed.

Technology also advanced at a staggering rate. This doesn't have a lot to do with Dunkelzahn so I'll just be as brief as possible. Lets just say that the worlds of Bladerunner, Cyberpunk, RoboCop, Johnny Mnemonic, Mad Max, and other near future SciFI clashed and combined with all that magic to create something unique.

Society changed even more but still stayed the same. Corporation became nations unto themselves. Ireland was reclaimed my creatures out of myth. Native people's rose up and reclaimed their lands, not only in America but around the world as well. Unfortunatly now along with the color of your skin, where you were born, your gender, your religion, and all the other things people use as an excuse to be horrible to each other you had magic to contend with. There was if you expressed physically with a Metatype (Orc, dwarf, troll, elf, etc.) there was if you could use magic as well. It is a real thought provoking nightmare scenario in a lot of ways.

One of the first big things that heralded the obvious return of magic was the emergence of the Great Dragons. These are ancient sentient being of immense power from ages past. They returned and with their hordes of treasure, vast intelligence and shocking power immediately became world powers. Some run huge corporation and other countries.

This is where Dunkelzahn comes in. This is the Grandest of the great Dragons. He was the first one to reach out and talk to society as a whole. He helped explain what was happening magically to the world as he played puppeteer behind the scenes. He ran for president of the largest remaining chunk of the United States, won and then was assassinated. Some say he arranged it to further his plans and his spirit is still alive out there manipulating things. The reading of his will was a world changing event that I cannot fully explain.

This is a long post, but a horribly short and vague description of one of my favorite fictional setting and one of it's cornerstone characters. Amusingly enough this game that has been around for over 30 years is set in the Sixth World and is now in it's Sixth Edition.