#etc but i'll talk about that in another post someday

[rehide]

just barely started my reread but. i think one of simultaneously both the most interesting and devastating aspects of rize, whose entire character is about her stolen autonomy, is that we never really get to know her outside of other characters perceptions of her. we know her through kaneki's brief meeting with her and his once hallucinated version of her, through furuta's idealized memories of her in the garden and the twisted perception he has of her now, through tsukiyamas run-ins with her, briefly through shachi's ideas he got of her as she was growing up, but we still rarely get to hear from her. and despite this, she's still overwhelmingly present in the narrative, though more as a concept than anything. we do briefly get that scene in re where she talks to kaneki about the garden, but it still cycles back around to what he has to accomplish going forward. a lot of the information we know about her comes from the people fighting so hard to control her and take the autonomy her entire arc is about in the first place. just something i've been thinking about. how we know rize is so overwhelmingly present in the narrative but the people who she's tried to escape from her entire life are primarily who we've learnt about her from.

[commsroom]

the "big picture" - whether that refers to some detached, calculated greater good; ruthless ambition and progress for the sake of progress; or even the dear listeners' cosmic indifference - as an antagonistic force in wolf 359 is so fascinating to me because of the way eiffel as a protagonist is set up to oppose it, just by nature of who he is. eiffel retains his humanity even under the most inhumane circumstances. his strength is in connection, and with that he's able to reach others who share his core values, but he's operating under a fundamentally different framework from the show's antagonists. he can never understand where they're coming from or be swayed by their points of view because, for better or worse, he can only see the world through a close personal lens.

it's an ideological conflict he has with all of them, but notably with hilbert: "you talk about helping people, but what about the real, live people around you? [...] that's your problem. you're so zoomed out." eiffel will never, ever see that "big picture" because he is so zoomed in. at his best, he puts things into perspective and grounds the people around him. at his worst, his perspective narrows so drastically inwards that he becomes blind to everyone and everything else. his failings are deeply, tragically human - they're personal, they're impulsive, they're self-destructive. they're selfish. no matter how much he might try to narrativize or escape from himself, he's still left with doug eiffel: "it's taken me this long to realize that running from everyone else means that you're alone with yourself." eiffel could never be convinced to harm others on purpose, but he has hurt people, and it's never been because he didn't care. the very fact that he cares so much, that he's incapable of reconciling the hurt he's caused with the things he values, is what keeps him from real growth for so long. where many of the other characters in wolf 359 will justify their cruelty in service of something they consider more important, eiffel is so caught up in vilifying himself and the fear that he's always going to harm the people he cares for without meaning to that he shuts himself off from the people who care about him and perpetuates his own self-fulfilling prophecy.

[crushedsweets]

i'm so obsessed w your blog you really unlocked all the nostalgia that's always waiting under the surface frfr i hope you send me spiraling all the way down again i miss it here so bad. anyway can i ask. what u got on... jane my beloved... sowwy if there's already like. posts abt it i'll go thru your whole blog someday and learn everything like my uni books xx

ok some quick warm up doodles this morning to go with the chat i got... tw for torture, stalking, really sad stuff.

link to my au that has a page with her in it

ok to start off with, jane/liu aren't TOO present in my story because jane and liu live really normal lives. most of their personal story is about recovery and growth, they were victims not aggressors. they're more involved in ninas story, rather than the overarching slender/operator paranormal problems...

jane grew up in an upper middle class household with incredibly loving parents. she was majoring in criminal psychology and lived with her parents, since they were close to the uni. it was during her second year in university that jeff began stalking her. he'd leave dead animals on her doorstep, light fires in her garbage cans, shatter windows without even entering the house, key her car, leave cryptic writings on her car that say stuff like '1f' (1female) to further scare her.

it wasn't that there was anything special about jane, but she had a super easy, very strict schedule to follow. her uni classes were all in the same building at the time, her car had a few cute stickers and decorations on/in her car that made it easy to spot, she only worked sat-mon at a cafe near her university. she was a happy person. easy victim he thought

eventually, while jane was out, he broke into her home and assaulted her parents. whether he used drugs or just stabbed them in the right place to make them immobile idk, but he got them tied up in the kitchen at some point. he was torturing them, doing the typical carved out smile bullshit, and he planned on leaving them for jane to find that night -- but, for the first time, her schedule was different. she came home from work while he was drenching the house in gasoline.

he panicked upon hearing her absolutely gutwrenching scream and quickly lit the trail of gasoline while she was trying to untie her dad (her mom was long gone by this point, her dad was barely managing a few wheezed breathes). he went to go finish jane off. he slashed her face, from her right temple, down her cheek, splitting her mouth in half and getting down to her left jaw. but the fire was spreading way faster than he anticipated, and he already heard sirens, so he bolted.

jane suffered 3rd degree burns covering her entire right leg and arm, it reached up her neck and her face, alongside some other parts of her body. she was pulled out of the fire, rushed to the hospital, and barely managed to survive.

jane had some outside family to support her, but her biggest supporter was her friend from middleschool mary vaugn. she moved into mary's house, took a semester off of school for recovery. the second she felt physically able to, she tried to drive herself right back into school, regardless of her mental condition.

she changed her major to criminal justice. she eventually graduated, fell in love with mary, got married, became a private investigator, etc. she spent a while working on jeff's case, losing sleep and hair over it- she was getting into some sketchy things to try and figure it out, because by this point jeff and ben were friends, and slenderman needs ben's help, so jeff's now protected by slenderman

but jane is one stubborn fucking woman and kept going. instead of sending the proxies to subdue jane, he sent sally.

sally was another poltergeist that kept haunting homes with newborn babies. she was attracting some attention, but slenderman cant physically stop a ghost - so he spent some time talking to sally, connecting with this little ghost girl and convincing her 'you're doing such a great job protecting all these infants, but this one needs you now'

he sent sally off to live with jane. mary's sister was staying with jane/mary after having a baby, so sally agreed to protect the baby. jane quickly welcomed sallys presense, always having believed good things of protective spirits. her mom used to tell her stories of how her grandmother's ghost would always come and soothe jane in her infancy (whether its true or not doesnt matter to jane) .

sally eventually became more than a presence to jane, almost completely integrating herself into her household's daily life. even after mary's sister and her baby left, sally stayed with jane. she felt safe there. (it helped that there were no men in the house too)

jane cares for sally like a daughter for a long time, and begins to redirect her life towards sally, rather than hatred for jeff. she never fully recovers from that night, and she never ever ever ever fucking 'forgives' jeff in any way, but she puts it aside for a while.

but sally is still a spirit, and does her fair share of wandering. she's always landing herself in the cornfields, the forest, etc, and jane goes frantic looking for her -- which is where she eventually bumps into the proxies. it's a huge mess, but she finds out what the fuck slenderman is and whats happening in that forest, but she just . . cant do anything about it. for sallys sake

eventually they get to the point where jane commonly finds herself walking in the forest with sally, or the proxies have to call jane and tell her to 'get her ghost kid' from the forest, etc.

at some point in this she also connects with liu. i don't know who reaches out first, whether it be liu desperately wanting to apologize for everything, or jane trying to figure out anything about jeff she can use to find him. this is how she finds out about nina.

jane smacked the shit out of nina when she first met her, in front of the proxies, who had to pull them apart. (i love nina but she deserved it after idolizing jeff). but nina is really fucking weird and began to idolize jane as well, and sally liked nina, which made it even more complicated, and that's why jane is the first person nina calls after jeff stabbed her ...

by this point janes hoping nina can heal, hoping liu can heal, hoping she herself can heal. ITS VERY HARD. its so unbelievably painful. that's basically where her story is at right now...

on a more positive note, she has a beautiful relationship with mary, and was hugely accepted in mary's family. she does poetry, creative writing, and is passionate about her career. she takes some extra creative writing/art courses at the local community college, just out of pure interest. she does her best to live a peaceful life

a bit off topic, but here's a little thing i copy and pasted from an old hc post too:

i cannot explain how close jane and her parents were. she was an only child in a upper middle class house to a lawyer and a real estate agent so she was always spoiled rotten, taken care of, always told how beautiful and smart she was. hence why losing them is the most fucking detrimental shit to ever happen to her. she literally worhsips her parents. she’s wore mothers wedding dress to her own wedding. her uncle(dads brother) walked her down the aisle holding a framed photo of her dad. she almost refused to walk during her university graduation because her parents couldn’t be there, despite the years worth of hardwork and dedication she put into it.

[x-liv25-jamieswife]

no pressure, I love your headcannons, will you do Avery and jameson

averyjameson head canons

my favorite ship in the whole wide world. hope you enjoy these. i'll probably do multiple posts for them bc i love them sm. again, not proof read bc i'm lazy as fuck.

sometimes, when avery is working, she'll start humming songs, and jameson just sits there listening to her.

avery loves sitting in between his legs bc jamie always starts stroking her hair and stuff.

avery and jameson will sometimes just sit in bed and read together.

during one of their adventures, avery fell and injured herself, and jamie flung her over his shoulder and carried her home. the paparazzi posted pictures of it online, and they went viral.

when they do interviews together and the person interviewing them start asking questions about their relationship, jamie starts gushing about how incredible avery is and how she's changed his life. he looks at her with so much love in his eyes that people post pics of them everywhere wishing they had a bf like jamie.

jamie absolutely lovesss physical touch. he's always holding her hand, hugging her, cuddling her, stroking her hair, kissing her, etc.

they absolutely loveee back hugs. jamie will sometimes creep up on her from behind and wrap her in his arms (he'll refuse to let her go).

when avery has nightmares, he'll make her lie down on top of him and stroke her hair, avery loves listening to his heartbeat.

ok many people have talked about this, but their first fight is the reason why they now have the codeword tahiti. in my head, their first fight was about how avery wasn't talking to him and he felt like he didn't know her (my poor baby avery just isn't used to confiding in people).

jamie lovessss kissing her. avery pretends she doesn't but she does

they absolutely love rooftop dates. they'll have picnics, and sometimes play golf like in thl.

jamie is always posting stuff about avery on his insta with cute little captions (sometimes its ts lyrics, sometimes he's just confessing his love), fans eat it up.

avery's fav color is obviously the color of jamie's eyes (green). ever since she started dating him, she started integrating more green in her wardrobe

jamie is always dedicating karaoke songs to her.

jamie asks max for relationship advice.

he loves carrying her to bed after a long day of work.

avery works sm she forgets to eat. jamie learns how to cook thanks to grayson and makes her meals.

during the eras tour, they swayed together to lover.

ok in another post i said xander fake proposed to avery during love story, but jamie would do it too.

when jamie started crying to tolerate it (he related to it bc of tobias, i also might be projecting...), avery held him in her arms.

avery vibes so hard to i knew you were trouble bc that was the song she associated to jamie when she first met him.

when avery has panic attacks, jamie just sits there with her. one of my other hc is that she loves sitting with her back to his chest, and so jamie sits her down in front of him and strokes her hair. when she's calmed down he'll try to distract her with riddles or by making her laugh (usually he does this by making a fool of himself)

jamie lovesss buying her gifts. he and xander will go shopping together to buy gifts for their gfs.

jamie sometimes gets nightmares about avery dying from the bombing, and so he lies down with his head on her chest to listen to her heartbeat.

speaking of that, jamie lovessss resting his head on her chest.

sometimes, jamie can't believe avery is actually his, and he starts crying. avery sometimes finds him, takes him to bed, and cuddles him while whispering sweet nothings in his ear.

jamie will sometimes call her avery hawthorne bc he knows that someday he'll marry her, and he wants to know what her name would sound like with his last name

when avery gets hate comments, he absolutely destroys the haters.

jamie loves taking pictures of her when she isn't expecting it.

like i said, jamie loves buying her gifts, but he especially likes to buy her jewelry.

avery is constantly stealing his shirts. jamie loves seeing her wearing his shirts sm that he'll put some of them in her drawers (he makes sure they smell like him)

avery loves watching jamie rock climbing bc she finds him hot (max teases her about it all the time).

jamie loves burying his nose in the crook of her neck at night when he can't sleep.

max once dared avery to do a tiktok dance with her, jamie is always rewatching the video bc he finds her beautiful

fans find them so cute they make fan accounts about them (there are hundreds of them). jamie likes to follow every one of them and comments on their posts.

[good-beanswrites]

I put together a few Lights, Camera, Sing Your Sins thoughts! Details about characters, filming, reactions, etc. I doubt I'll get the chance to smoothly work some of them into the drabbles, but I still wanted to share them :)

Post-T1 thoughts:

The first few days out of the prison are really weird and awkward – the prisoners got too deep in the immersion and are slowly remembering what’s real and talking some things out. Before these major emotions can wear off, they’re pulled aside by various writers and teams to make a plan for the next trial. They meet up with deco*27 himself and the songwriting begins

They each have a private bedroom in the facility. The first night, they’re all super excited to not be sleeping in those uncomfortable cells, and then immediately feel really closed off to the others. For some it remains a good thing – Yuno is glad for the isolation, Fuuta’s paranoia about judgment is eased, etc. Still, it’s strange to be separated from the people they’ve been side-by-side with for a year and a half, 24/7. Many of them end up sleeping on the floor of one another’s room or leaving their doors wide open. 

Jackalope is using long distance tech to project his voice into the prison, but the animal in the prison is just a well-trained pet with some hardcore costuming. Freed from its little uniform, the rabbit gets lots of pets and pampering from the prisoners. 

They aren’t allowed to leave and visitors must be for filming purposes only, but each prisoner is allowed a phone call (“hey, just like a real prison!” Jackalope laughs). Haruka calls his sister, and so does Fuuta. They stay on the phone for a really long time. Yuno calls her parents, making sure to say hi to Yura. Muu calls her parents too, and cries hearing their voices. Shidou calls his family; being separated from them for so long only confirms his near-miss intentions. Mahiru realizes too late she should have called her family – instead, fresh off the guilty verdict, she calls her ex to apologize profusely. Kazui considers a few people he could call, but doesn’t take Jackalope up on the offer right away. Later in the hiatus he calls his childhood friend just to say hi; he doesn’t mention any of the experiment stuff going on. Amane wanted to call her father, but she doesn’t want to break the news that she’s not doing a good job because of her verdict. She waits until she knows he’ll be out per his usual schedule, and leaves a brief and formal message on the machine. Mikoto calls his mom and sister, asking about how everyone’s doing (and largely avoiding talking about himself). Kotoko calls her family, surprised at how emotional she gets hearing their voices. 

Jackalope makes the mistake of mentioning updated guilty uniforms in front of the prisoners. Fashion expert Mahiru, designer Mikoto, and just simply nosy Yuno and Muu track down the costuming team to “help.” Though there’s not a ton of alterations to be made, they enjoy being a part of the process. They end up sticking around and chatting about mv outfits.  Mahiru enjoys everyone’s choices and fittings, and promises Amane they’ll go shopping someday and have a proper dress fitting. She asks if Es is going to get a new uniform as well. When told no, she vows she’ll take them shopping as well.

Though not allowed to leave, they’re at least allowed to step outside in designated areas. They enjoy the sun and rain and stars. The smoking group is excited to meet outside. Mikoto makes sure to hang out with them a bit extra seeing as he’s going to leave the group a bit come T2.  

I wrote the drabbles as individual scenes since it was nice to give each prisoner their own time like that, but logically some filming would be overlapped a bit. Jackalope would still want to direct everything as best he could, but there may be multiple scenes filming at once. I just really liked the idea of the mixing of props and costumes. They yell “cut!” as Bee Muu takes a shortcut through the Backdraft set. Yuno accidentally leaves her pink-glasses rabbit in one of the AKAA chairs and Haruka laughs in the middle of a take as he moves it out of frame. Amane is on a quick break from her scene and Mikoto shows her around the train still in full marching band getup. (I just realized these were all back to back videos, but I think any and all can overlap lol)

Shidou is still the one to administer Mahiru and Fuuta’s bandages. Even though it’s fake, he wants it a) to be his real handiwork and b) to be accurate, given the disaster of Throw Down. He’s excited to share his knowledge and explain exactly how each of their imagined injuries would affect them, telling them the proper way to act. Mahiru listens intently, all but taking notes, while Fuuta is bored to death of his doctor-jargon ramble.

Back pre-T1, Jackalope started off telling the prisoners they can choose their song titles (just for organization's sake, Es won’t see them) but he ends up taking over because their titles are really, really bad. It’s a mix of those really long sentence-style titles and cool words/phrases that have absolutely nothing to do with the song itself. Jackalope goes through the files renaming “The Sweet Whispers of A Lost Love,” “Fuck You,” “They say three strikes and you’re out but clearly they’ve never met me before” and “Kotokos_song.mp3”. By the time they start filming second trial videos, it doesn’t phase him to open up files titled “Elegy to a Broken Heart,” “I checked the train schedule five times and still missed my stop,” “I Can’t Be Normal,” and “Kotokos_song(1).mp3”. 

And some post-T2 thoughts:

The verdicts are both easier and harder to handle this time around. This is the second break from the immersion, and it’s easier to separate reality from experiment. However, the videos and interrogations this time around were a lot more raw, so there’s an extra sting of betrayal to them. Es got to look deep – much deeper than most – and still chose not to forgive.

Haruka isn’t really worried about death or harm from the verdict, but he does feel betrayed that Es would throw his life away like that. Muu doesn’t fear the consequences, but is saddened that once again she made someone like her only to turn against her when they saw her true self. The t1 guilties have a little meetup where they breathe a collective sigh of relief and congratulate one another on making it through. Fuuta just kind of sinks in relief, while Mikoto is giving out high-fives. Then they make a beeline for the current guilties to see how they can help.

Mahiru and Mikoto were always helpful to the others, but Fuuta surprises everyone by constantly checking in with the guilty prisoners. He remembers how much the verdict sucked and wants to try and help/prepare them as much as he can.

Red appears every once and a while to force people to take breaks when filming gets very involved/tiring. While Blue is pretty chill and cheery about everyone staying hydrated and getting good sleep, Red is a bit more serious with his approach. 

I think with another innocent verdict and seeing everyone 'behind the scenes,' Kazui would finally, finally start opening up to people. I like to think, as Yuno starts filming another video about very comfortable with her sexuality, he approaches her first with the topic.

When given the chance to make phone calls, most of the prisoners choose the same people as before. Haruka doesn’t want to call anyone at first, but is glad when Muu forces him to call his sister. He’s by her side when she calls her parents. Mahiru remembers to call her parents first, telling them to pass along her well wishes to others. She got the verdict she was hoping for, but Amane can’t bring herself to call home. 

The upcoming videos will likely be even more intense, but that just makes everyone band together more. They give each other confidence. They work extra hard to get silly goofy when it’s in good taste. 

[authorspirit]

🐾🐾 Boop! Boop! 🐾🐾

I'd love to know what simmer has got you hooked right now! Please share what you're binge-reading on Simblr!

Share this with other simmers to get some recommendations on who to follow! Let's keep spreading some love! 💚

This list is going to be long. :') SORRY BUT NOT SORRY. And I'm sure I'll be missing people here.

There are a lot of stories I have started reading in the middle of it and intend to catch up the beginning of them. But I can instantly get hooked on so many stories, as long as someone puts "previous | next" buttons, I'm in danger of falling into a story's universe. (I also have the hardest time to follow everyone but I try to.)

@matchalovertrait (OF COURSE YOU) I still need to catch up before I met sassy toddler Dulce. I can't believe she's a preteen now. I do enjoy following people's legacy challenges and I like how I forget that it's one with how you really create your own storylines around the base requirements.

@ice-creamforbreakfast I'm not going to lie, I came for the CC, I stayed for the BACC challenge and I am now following the Romano legacy.

@gooretrait I really do love following legacy challenges. Also, console player?? It's also a good reminder of all the fun you can get without cc and mods, just very inspiring imagination-wise.

@eurosimmer breaks the fourth wall in her captions and it's hilarious to me. It's also a legacy challenge, but oh boy I forget it everytime.

@pleasanttaleswithkaityb completely changed my way of playing! (and also of sharing content on tumblr) I also have a soft spot for taking townies as a base, because we kind of all know the backstories for them a bit. (I say that and I never played Sims 2, just binge-watched Sims lore videos.) I love how people change their stories.

@ruthplaysthesims Talking about appropriating Sims townies and make them evolve, I LOVE Kaori's story. In TS4 we all know the lore is meh (with it being on supposedly another timeline etc). The Mt. Komorebi storyline is SO interesting, I really have to play in that world someday without ruining them all. And somehow, Ruth made it even more interesting! Like I already wanted to know more about them, now I'm looking for any little bit of detail referencing their childhood or something. Anyway I highly recommend, I love all the new stories she put out as well (Raina 💖)

@kamiiri Back to other Sims lore game, I LOVE Strange! I watched a LP of Sims 2 on PS very recently and somehow found Strange at the same time... The setting, the weaving of all the storylines together, continuing all of them together... I love it. It's also very cinematic I'd say? There's something in those screenshots, I love it.

@holocene-sims One day I saw a notification of them and next thing you know I was trying to read everything about Grant from the start on mobile (but it's hard to read on mobile so I have A LOT to catch up). So now I'm catching up the recent story posts! But as I'm writing this post, I know I have a lot to catch up already.

@cinamun Add it to the list of "I should really read the beginning of it but for now I'll just keep on trying to catch any post they make", Things Fall Apart's universe has really sucked me in and I really like how cinamun interacts with everyone! (I admit I am a lurker but I want to try this lemon pepper wings recipe someday and share them with all the readers.) Reading TFA really gives me the vibes of watching a daily evening TV show with my family: we did not necessarily watch since the beginning, we just one day started watching all together, and now we're eating dinner in front of it every night. (And of course sharing our reactions)

@havenroyals If you like some spice and love messy stuffs, you'll be served. I also really like the Gossip queen edits it's just such an interesting way to add variation to tell stories.

@theroyalsims In the same vein of the Gossip Queen edits, I really like how we follow the story of the royal families with articles about them and not from their direct point of view. (I'm also currently trying to guess who is getting married soon because I know there is a royal wedding soon among those sims.)

OK small pause because we've entered the royal simblrs that I follow. There are a lot, it's how I found the simblr community in the first place. One thing I have to say is that I love all the collabs people do, the way so many stories are interconnected through everyone's sim and I genuinely think it's a lovely community (even if I'm not part of it myself as I'm just a reader).

@sosa-royals is the first royal simblr I came across and read everything. The drama? I LOVED it.

@officalroyalsofpierreland After meeting child Maria Aisha I had to learn more about her family. I was not disappointed.

@funkyllama this inevitably led me to want to learn more about the Ionian Union and I really like the world building in general? Also those last edits? I love it.

@empiredesimparte of course there is the complete Europeansim on my list. I particularly enjoy reading in French sometimes when my mind just wants to rest from reading in English. I also love Hortense and everytime I see a big event in the story I would be like: "oh J'AI LA REF ! It really looks like in real life." (you are very talented at building). And in general, I really recommend the worldbuilding tag? Because I love it?

@anachrosims' @prydainroyals Talking about someone talented at building? Yeah, I still have to catch up from the beginning. But this one should be feasible as it is more recent? (I don't know, you're also a good writer, PLEASE tell me what you can't do.)

@nexility-sims Among stories that are easy to start digging in someone's universe, I would recommend reading 1992. Eventually I'll read the story it's a spin-off of and @/armoricaroyalty's story, but yeah. My list of stories to catch up is already long for now.

@trentonsimblr and @ardeney-sims I'm putting both of them in the same bullet point because I've been wanting to enjoy their stories for a while and only decided to fully commit when Between A Rock and A Hard Place started. Similarly to 1992, it can be enjoyed without having the whole back story but yeah. I'll definitely enjoy reading the back stories of main characters and "side" characters (which you see glimpses of in BRHP).

@thegrimalldis Very similarly to the previous bullet points, I started reading with a "spinoff", the prequel "Maximilian" rather than the main story after seeing the username a lot of times. I have since caught up the main story I believe, but I may have to reread to be sure. I also have to read the story of succession (because it's complete and I like complete stories).

@theroyalthornoliachronicles and if we have to go back in time, I would highly suggest Ali's story! Though I can't wait to see modern Thornolian generations? 👀 Also, I'm a reader from after Ali lost her blog and I would say now is the best time to start reading if you're like me and have a massive TBR pile, since we're at chapter one!

OK I think I had most of my currently followed stories. I'm 100% missing people but I will try to reblog more of people's stories so you all can see what I'm reading at the moment!

Did this post take me two hours because I'm catching up on reading WHILE answering? Yes.

[autumnslance]

Writing To Yourself

(Mileage may vary, I'm not your mom nor your teacher--unless you're working for a specific state healthcare service, anyway.)

That's how you garden. Tend the plot. Plant a million seeds, reap a thousand blooms. The rest? Compost for the next crop. -@biot08 / @driftward

During a Discord convo, I thought about why so many fandom writers catch “writer’s block”, and some of it goes back to self-care and taking in new media, getting inspiration and knowledge, covered in this post. But much of it?

People think everything they create has to be publishable for others’ consumption. That is Not True. Too often we don't want to write things just for the sake of writing them, falling into the trap of thinking it needs to be perfectly polished and shared, but No It Really Doesn't.

Folks talk about “writing for oneself” but in terms of posting finished pieces of the kinds they want to see. If everything feels like it “has to be” publishable, it can start to put too much pressure on oneself. And then there’s your block, especially if the type to worry about how others Perceive you and your art.

Try simply writing anything and deciding later if it's something you want to share. I have pieces I wrote cuz my brain suddenly said it wanted to, but that writing isn't posted anywhere. Usually it’s random lines; out of context sentences, scenes, or bits of dialogue. Sometimes just incoherent character rambling. Ideas for situations and what ifs. Misspelled, typos, not grammatical, redundant wording, passive voice, bad POV, too many adverbs, not enough active verbs, not enough description, too much description, etc. All in notebooks or doc files. I’ve shared the (now out-dated) deep nests of my WIPs folders and the multiple, unfinished, unpolished pieces within them. Most will never be completed nor seen by the public. 

For instance, I've a random smut fic of a Highlander Warrior of Light and the popular antagonist of Shadowbringers. I'm not usually a villain liker, but one day it hit my brain, so I wrote it. I have notes and outlines for the rest of their story and how it plays out, though I'll probably never write more. I scratched the writing itch, stretched some skills, considered things from a different angle, and now it sits in drafts (I did post a couple decent-ish smut lines to my private Twitter once).

Mostly, it's practice. Even if it's junk and janky.

“But I have (professionally) published X or Y…”

Still gotta exercise the writing muscles! Still gotta scrawl off something utterly unusable now and again for the heck of it!

All those random lines, descriptions, scenes, rambles? Maybe I'll use them someday. I wrote them down to feel the pen in my hand or keys clacking under my fingers, to see the words pop onto the page or screen, to play with word choice, sentence structures, and “how would they say that?” For my own satisfaction, no one else’s.

When I get bored or stuck, or need a screenshot or writing prompt response, I might poke at those lines, pages, rambles, and see if they hit now or spin off to something else. They often don’t. But sometimes they help inform other things I do post to the public later. Even if that’s just a Question of the Day prompt response on Twitter.

(That also counts as writing and creating btw; you’re still coming up with something to share about your characters and I think that’s very creative of you.)

If the mood strikes, write. Even if it's just a vague idea--especially if it's any bits of dialogue or description, if it's something you think that you actually do want to write when off work or out of bed or whatever.

Even if you never post it anywhere public. Even if it never gets out of crummy first draft, unfinished pages form. It might feel like pulling teeth and look rough, especially if it’s been awhile.

But still write it. No one else has to know or see. Not until you want them to.

Maybe parts of it will inform something you do finish later. Maybe two years from now another prompt will hit just right and you’ll dig out that draft and finish it for posting. Maybe you’ll cannibalize aspects of it for an entirely different piece. Maybe you’ll even use it in a few more years to see how far you’ve come as a writer.

In many cases? That's how you actually keep writer's block away. Keeping ideas around to steal from yourself, letting yourself write nonsense, unpublishable bits and pieces, maybe even whole pages, just for the heck of it, if writing is something one enjoys and wants to stick with as a hobby (or professionally). If you don’t enjoy writing for fun? Don’t force it; do little character prompts and blurbs as they feel right, and find the ways to share creativity that work for you.

And seriously, don’t forget to take in new media, experiences, and information. This is How You Lose the Time War got me writing on an original story I shelved last autumn. The stories aren't at all alike! But seeing new words in new ways helped shake something loose in my brain. So try to make some time for that, too.

Write to yourself, not for others’ consumption. Public posting is great for validation and encouragement, for when we feel the urge to share due to pride or just wanting to gush about our faves. But also let yourself remember why you liked creating worlds, making up stuff about your characters, and writing at all to begin with, without the pressure of public posting. Give yourself some grace, and let it all be messy, unhinged, misspelled, ungrammatical, incomplete, and make no narrative sense.

Write to yourself, for yourself. Then let the rest follow.

[amaranthine-wrath]

˗ˏˋ ❌ INTRO POST ❌ ´ˎ˗

The name's April (she/her). Welcome to my sideblog. I'm an alter in the Apartment System and this is my personal space for whatever I want. Gaming, music, miscellaneous thoughts, pixel art, and more will be shared here. I'm also conceptkin and will probably post about that now and again which is why I've used the tag.

Be warned: This blog may contain sensitive content (like mental health talk and occasional horror themes) but everything will be tagged to the best of my ability. Minors do not interact, you WILL be blocked on sight.

Read on for my basic info and other fun stuff. Kinda long but whatever, feel free to skim or skip around.

(Last updated: 9/2/24)

˗ˏˋ WHO AM I? ´ˎ˗

As stated above, my name is April, I use she/her pronouns, and I'm an alter. Physically 25 and Black-Latino. Since this is a sideblog, I like and follow from the host's main blog (found here).

I identify as conceptkin. Specifically, I am rage personified. The special kind of rage that comes from intense hurt and grief. From wounds that may never heal. This doesn't give me any fancy form, though. I'm just some girl. I've felt this way since I first came to be over a decade ago and since it hasn't changed in all this time I feel comfortable saying this is a solid part of my identity.

I don't mind talking to people so go ahead and send asks but I've gotta warn that sometimes I can be a little flat through text. I'm not mad, I just don't feel like using a million emojis and exclamation points. I won't really answer messages though because holding 1-on-1 conversations with strangers is hard.

˗ˏˋ INTERESTS? ´ˎ˗

Art is a growing interest of mine. I love pixel art and doodling and someday I'll get into Blender/3D modeling and animation. I'm starting to get into code (HTML and CSS). The Sims 4 and Minecraft are my current games but once I've got an actual PC I'll be playing a lot more. I also enjoy poetry, alternative subcultures, and word games like Scrabble and Boggle.

I listen to a decent mix of music (metal, rock, breakcore, techno, etc). Here's my playlist if you wanna get to know a chunk of my music taste. I also update the playlist fairly regularly these days and I love recommendations. Some things are only on YouTube so they didn't get included but it's whatever.

˗ˏˋ DNI? ´ˎ˗

Minors, bigots/TERFs, "endos", ableists, etc. I'm not putting a big ass list. Make me uncomfortable or annoy me and I'll block you. Feel free to block me, too. Curate your own spaces and all that jazz. Involve me in discourse of any kind and I blow you up with my mind for real.

˗ˏˋ EXTRAS! ´ˎ˗

@devotional-devouring - Plague's Blog (Host/the main blog) @doll-disjointed - Mason's Blog (another alter sideblog)

#April's Chatting - Tag for text posts

More to come later. Here's some cool images.

Thanks for reading. Have a good day.

(Icon Credit)

[changbinsboobs]

interesting so you would say its quite accurate to how they would personally view xyz things? do you then get dreams of them often or not at all? if you get the same info months later then u would know its accurate to what they personally desire or idfk maybe they prefer something else later down the line but i read readings on several groups and theres quite a few similarities among different types of members so leaders seem to be quite possessive maybe tad controlling of their partners, like hongjoong as well for example

I do wonder sometimes bc it is impossible to really know them only from their on screen personality and kpop likes to blur things out that may be considered an imperfection? idk how to describe it but like they cant really be fully themselves so in readings it gives a greater sense of who they are without being too invasive kinda like inside info without doing the stalking that sasaengs do to get such info.

would be so cool to know them personally like u get to see the raw them what they think on xyz subjects not the stuff they cant tell their fans. i bet they have good amounts of gossip about their teammates too. i wonder if their interests in lesser common people stems from the fact kpop is so particular that when theh meet someone entirely different to what kpop is or stands for then it really draws them in to that person or maybe those. i mean with todays technology idols do sometimes have less boundaries or maybe the tendancy to overshare things that dont need to be shared so maybe in readings idols look for people outside of kpop world and maybe thats why they show up in tarot readers dreams so often bc they have particular message or situation going on n they want to show it to someone. sorry for rambling but theyre such interesting ppl.

who in skz do u think would have maybe not a crush on the same person but idk they could have a desire to win the person over from another member if that makes sense?

Hey, so no i don't really dream much about them anymore. But i used to have A LOT of very very interesting dreams with them during a certain period of time. I especially often dream about Lee Know, and i had very interesting dreams with Felix and Hyunjin too. Changbin too but he was kind of a hidden protector and it wasn't really him...ufhfbf i don't know how to explain it but i think I'll make a post someday and love to hear other peoples dreams with them too💗 about your other question with the similarities in readings etc, i did another answer before your where i explain my view a little bit.

And yeah i think tarot is a great way to get closer to the idols - of course consumed and performed in a healthy, respectful way - i believe there might actually be lots of idols that may somehow feel relief through such reading, on an uncounscous level because we shine light on matters they aren't allowed to talk about but would love to express. Like in Chan's case, as i said he seems very eager to "talk" during my readings and is always ready and the first one to spill the tea freely😂 i sometimes can see him giggling and wiggling in excitement, or giving me a spicy side eye or whatever😂

And regarding your question at the end, i still haven't done enough readings on them to be able to just make a speculation, so i layed some cards on it. I don't have a definitive answer but i belive someone was in a relationship and there were 2 members that had their eye on that person. I believe on of the "admirers" was felix. And i have a strong feeling the member with the "girlfriend" was Changbin. Now i put those "" on girlfriend, because it doesnt seem to me that they were necesarily in a relationship, but rather courting? Like they definitely had some give and take at least energetically and in conversations. I cant really tell how far that connection went and if ever really was a relationship but there was def something. And 2 memebrs looked at that person with drool coming out of their mouth😂 felix being one of them, and again i see that weird sleazy energy that freaks me out🥲 its not malicious but its really weird and unnerving, he is very obvious in his liking to that person, but he doesnt take any steps or seem threatening, but his energy is so shameless and direct and penetrating. The other person was more hidden with his liking, but i think changbin still knew. He def knew about felix, and i think he suspected about the other person too. Weirdly enough i dont pick up on him being mad or feeling betrayed or threatened. Quite the oposite actually, i think felt like a boss😂 having "access" or a "chance" with something that others also want. He felt powerful in a way.

*take this with a grain of salt.

[undobutton]

okay okay so.. remember when i wrote this hobie fic and mentioned how i'd introduce my oc who's his friend?

well I lied. Bunny (the friend in question) is a black cat varient (idk why i didn't say that in the post) but anyhow. i do have a spider-sona and i wanna ramble about them and their relationship with their hobie varient as well as their earth and whatever. instead of Bunny bc im hyperfixated on them.

So without further ado... here is Juniper Willow! The Amazing Jumping Spider of Earth-19962! brought to you by myself, the sims 4 ft. many talented cc creators, and naylissah's "black centered picrew"!! someday I'll draw them for y'all, but not here. not now.

Basics~

Name: Juniper Willow

Nicknames: Purr, June, Juni, Period.

pronouns: she/they

Age: 19

Birthday: Jan. 23

Zodiac sign: Aquarius

Sexuality: pan

Favorite season: summer

Favorite color: neon pink & green

Spends time: writing music, roller skating, scheming

Likes: music, helping others, thrifting, Hobie ❤️

Dislikes: Big companies, police officers,

Bad habits: mumbling, accidentally overworking themself.

Good at: roller skating, poetry, chemistry

Job: being the Jumping Spider

Family: Older sister, Tina. Tina's girlfriend, Liz. Niece(Tina's kid), Anna. Twin brother, Benny.

Extra info: Left home with Tina when she was little. doesn't really talk to her parents.

Looks~

Height: 5'7

Skin color: mocha? smth like that

Eye color: used to be brown. Now pink and green.

Hair color: dark brown.

Hair description: stomach length locs, usually tied up in loose twin buns. occasionally down for events.

Body type: hourglass

Main outfit description: (see photos above)

Not so basic info~

Fears: stuffy noses. forests @ night.

Hesitant to tell about: their relationship with their mom.

Would cause a scene over: someone mistreating another person. being lied to.

Pretends not to care about: Tina's approval.

You can find them: in their basement/hide out thingy (I'll make it in the sims soon.)

Wants to come off as: reliable, funny, caring

Comes off as: heroic, childish (on occasion)

Intro. Or extro.: introverted, but likes meeting new people every now and then.

Pets: none (Tina won't let them)

origin story (short version):

Doctor Olivia Canna was working on her experiment for years. The spider had the ability to create strong webs and a substance that could dissolve almost anything! and she lost it.. it had been months and she could only hope that the spider would find its way back to her. or still be close by.

meanwhile, Juniper caught a cold and couldn't sleep with her mouth closed bc of a stuffy nose. so while she was sleeping, the spider crawled into her mouth and took a trip to stomach acid town.

as the weeks go by, Juniper gets new abilities and with the help of their twin brother, Benny, they decide to use their powers for good! Juniper steals from big companies and gives all her findings to homeless shelters and the like. she steals tampons, pads, baby formula, diapers, toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, clothing etc! and sometimes they'll stop a crime or two.

Once Juniper's savings and stealings become more public, Doctor Olivia sends her most reliable 'friend' The prowler to go out and find this Jumping Spider.

annd I'll go into further detail in the chapters I write about Juniper later! I'll have the first one out soon!!

-button 🌺

[illbestarryeyedforyou]

I always see you reblog posts with the hashtag someday or fatherhood. How do you stay positive in those days when you feel kinda sad it hasn't come yet? (if you ever feel that way)

hmm, interesting question —

I could be a goof about it and just say that straight up delusion keeps me positive about such life or dream of mine hahaha, but I'll try to be more honest.

Keep in mind that it's different for everyone, okay? 😊😊

Firstly, for the "someday" because it's more broad with stuff like life goals, life, family, love, adventure, etc- ...I understand my reality or where I'm at in life. I accept that I've rejected advancement in relationships, career opportunities, and travel opportunities in general. At the same time, I've also made peace that I've missed out on opportunities when it pertains to the same things. But mostly important, I acknowledge that some setbacks or missed opportunities were due to my immaturity, mental health, inexperience, and hubris. I just didn't know better.

And that's okay.

So that's step one: understanding the reality of my situation and where I am in life.

And, well at least for me, it does get lonely, quiet (or loud depending on how you see it), hopeless, meaningless, and disheartening feeling as though you won't be able to experience joy in life or love in general.

However, I'm just optimistically in love with life ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. I will always choose to or try my best to remain in love with life because each day is a new day and you never know what it might bring. I'm intentionally choosing to make the most of what I have currently in my life and appreciate it. I'm choosing to be grateful for the friends I've made and currently have. Cherish them as much as I can. Moreover, where I'm at in life is not where I'll be forever. Meaning, maybe I have a job I don't enjoy.. I can always find another one or endure it for the sake of survival, and saving up money until I find a better job.

I'm trying not to ramble and make sense at the same time —

Do I want love? YES. I want to be that person someone wants to call to talk to and wish good night. I want to be that someone's daydream. I want to be someone's good thing. And everything else I've reblogged about love. And I will. I'm hopeful I'll find them or they'll find me 😊😊 and when that happens, forever will start.

Until then, I gotta keep growing as a person, friend, family member, and man. I gotta keep trying to be the best version of myself every day 😊😊

That being said, try not to drown in the longings to where it becomes an ocean of sadness. It's okay to want that and grieve for it as well BUT get the fuck up, look up, and breathe. You'll get all of that in due time 😊😊

Tumblr is a good place to read this post I'm about to paraphrase - you ever came across that text post about romanticizing your life? DO THAT. Be in love with the life you currently have, love your friends, family and yourself. Make the most of what you have and what you can experience, all while being excited and curious about your tomorrows 😊😊

It's not easy, and it will never get easier to deal with those sad, lonely and empty days, but it'll be worth it. time will pass anyways so you might as well be good in it 😊

—

As for "fatherhood"?

I think the fact that I'm an uncle to 10+ niblings makes it easier for me to deal with that "missing part" of my life hahaha—

There's not really much to explore other than the fact that I hope someday I get the opportunity to be a dad or be seen as a father figure? Whether it's biologically or as a step dad. That's all. I don't know if it will ever happen, that's out of my control like most things, BUT I really really really hope it does. I feel like I could make the best dad/step dad out there 😊😊😊

———

okay.. this is how I approach life, anon. It's messy, and chaotic and extremely delusional, but I try to take a minute or two to appreciate what I do have and even if I have nothing, I'm choosing to remain optimistically in love with life. 😊😊

thank you so much for the ask, anon. I hope I made sense(?) and this helps you in any small way in figuring out how to deal with those difficult days. Good luck, rooting for you. 😊✌🏽

[lunanoc]

im intrigued by literally every single one of your wips but i want to know about the dmbj time travel and abo ones (and also the sleep fic, if you need an excuse to talk about it 👀)

to be honest i've had a look at what these wips are because i didn't even fully remember some of them, so the abo ones are actually just two versions of the same thing 😭 so since someone else asked, the abo one explanation is here"

"dmbj time travel" is the first ever dmbj i ever started writing waaay back when i hadn't even finished the dramas yet and it shows. i want to fix it because i like the basic idea behind it, it just needs A Lot of reworking because the characterization is uh. yeah. so no snippets from this one even if it's technically like 14k or something

it's supposed to be canon time travel where for some reason (i'm not sure yet since it's getting revamped) post-restart yucun wu xie, xiaoge, and pangzi transmigrate back into their own bodies from the start of canon (so think even before jin wantang comes to wu xie with the copy of chen pi ah si's silkbook) except none of them know the other two remember. it's supposed to feature, among other fun things:

wu xie and existential crisis #476, is this real life or it is just snake fantasy?

unresolved sanshu tension™️ part 3 because good things come in threes because wu sanxing is still around at this point, and for all he's resolved most of his grievances about his uncle, wu xie doesn't quite know how to face him, partly because their relationship carries so much baggage, partly because he knows how shrewd wu sanxing is, which leads into wu xie rushing into wu sanxing's shop with the silkbook becoming a 4d chess conversation where both parties are aware on different levels that the person they're talking to is hiding things. something something wu xie notices wu sanxing test for a face mask etc

because pingxie are established at this point, and because so far no one else has remembered anything except wu xie, xiaoge angst™️ the remix and wu xie thinking he'll have to love him from afar again

which leads into sand sea wu xie™️ the remix, because if he's gone that far back, why not take on the wangs earlier than planned

the scene that's the reason why this even exists an excuse, wu xie and xiaoge (who didn't meet in front of wu sanxing's shop like the first time bc wu xie was too busy playing 4d chess with himself) realizing at some point on the trip to the seven star palace that they both remember because wu xie decides to test their shared knocking code language on a whim. and then xiaoge looks at him. and they both have A Moment that they can't express because they're not supposed to know each other

another scene where they're both bastards who decide to troll pangzi when they meet with him, partly to test whether or not he remembers too (he does), which leads to pangzi sussing them out eventually and yelling at them, then hugging them

i don't really have much of anything else mostly because they do eventually go back to their own time, because i don't really see the point in rewriting canon, i'll think about it someday. maybe

the sleep fic is kind of the sister fic to the sleep xiaoge pov one and it's pretty unoriginal because it's been done 50 times already i am deeply unoriginal unfortunately , it's the "wu xie has insomnia after ten years later" fic. my personal take on it is wu xie, after book 8, went from mild to severe depression, and then spent the next five years after that in go go go mode where he essentially forced himself to shutdown as far as his own basic emotional needs went. and like a lot of people who suddenly stop after not allowing themselves to for a long time, things start coming out of the woodwork. so once xiaoge's back and he's finished tidying up in hangzhou, the iron triangle move to yucun, and suddenly wu xie can't sleep. he never had insomnia that severe before (and if he did he'd just take sleeping pills and be done with it), but now he either can't sleep, or when he does he has nightmares

xiaoge eventually notices wu xie doesn't look well (among all the other things he's noticed) and is increasingly tired, so he tries to help in his own ways. eventually they get together. i wish it was more thought out than that 😭

[knightofhylia]

Your conlang seems very interesting! Care to infodump a bit, if you want? (I'm genuine) (I'm a language nerd)

It is still in it's infancy so it's a hot mess right now, but I'd love tell y'all about it! It's a mix of all my random amateur language studies and just straight up 'the ghosts told me this word' lol

It's called Akelkiahn, as it is the language of the people of Akelkiah (basically my religions avalon, eden, etc). It's shorthand is AKL. I do have a baby blog @akelkiah where I plan to post in the language and about the culture and shit! I mostly use it as a tag system and when I write spells!

I generated it using vulgarlang.com and have been working at nitpicking the words and shit for a few years. I use IPA reader for pronounciations.I chose Hebrew as the base phonetics because when I have HEARD the language in my dreams and from the spirits it sounded similar, and I figured it was a good start as I would be adding on a LOT of dialects.,the only word I really remember hearing in my dreams was 'kipahnu' which meant 'little rebel', and they also said 'shamat' meant baby. Each of dialect is separated by colour (this diagram is old and messy I made it in like 5 min. names at the bottom are the deities)

I don't have a script yet and idk anything about lingustics terms or anything so I'll give a little demo of some phrases and break it down.I was a DINGUS and did not save the grammar rules.... so if it's wrong.... let me live.

To cut down on using pronouns over and over, you can mark things by using the last few letters added on to the word. For plurals you just repeat the last letter or syllable. to NEGATE a word, you write or say it backwards. Examples:

petz ge ta'shatohkh (you are sunshine, KH added here makes it MY sunshine, using the pronoun for me- BOKH) bokh ho ta'shatohkh (Me only sunshine with possessive KH) petz gish mefu'avkh (you make happyME. the other way to say this would be petz gish bokh mefu'av) av tmimm ge zmuv (when skies are grey. The word for sky is tmim, extra M makes it skies)

An example using you pronouns petz:

You have snake scales covering your eyes is a phrase to mean 'you are getting in the way of yourself' boftz malmosh ture' eden meyy (haveYOU snake scales cover up eyes)

Another example is basically the YOLO of the AKL world 'Everything is Nothing' can be translated as two ways:

Zif la paf (literal, everything is nothing) = Zif la fiz (everything is not everything)

also something funny that they told me was being called a chicken (shagufos) in AKL culture is NOT meaning you are scared or skittish, it means you talk too much about yourself, (me me me translation to bokh bokh bokh, sounding like a chicken).

I think the best translation is still the name for the 7 Sisters, the main deities..... is 'dad boy' which is honestly a great gender to have and very fitting for them.

I'm always down to talk about Aklekiahn stuff I'm just nervous about talking about the aliens in my head. lol! If you like any words or ideas feel free to use them, this is a language that is meant to be adapted!

((((((((someday I hope to do this with Hylian, so keep an eye out for that lolol)))))))

[myevilmouse]

I finished re-reading Dis Manibus for the hundredth time, and it’s still 100/100. You made me enjoy Luke as a character, and I think you really highlighted his compassion and gentleness, which not all stories do well. I also loved the Thryce, of course.

Two questions, if you don’t mind: 1) At the end, is Luke coming to like Pryce due to the residual influence of Thrawn, or does he genuinely like her as a person? Maybe a bit of both? 2) I vaguely remember a sequel being mentioned on your blog. Do you still intend to write one someday?

Thank you so much for this amazing note @mireilleblue! So happy to hear Dis Manibus holds up on the rereads!  And your words about Luke and Thryce just turn me into a puddle of happiness.

I do not mind questions at all (I love asks!) and in this case you gave me an excuse to talk about a fic that is a fave!  It was such an unexpected story that really wrote itself, and it was a real pleasure to get it on the digital “page.”

I am putting the answers to your questions below the cut because there be spoilers if anyone hasn’t read the fic! Anyone who would like to, please come back later and... 😊

So to your first question, the answer is definitely “a little bit of both.”  My idea was that Luke, being Luke, can see the good in everyone, including Pryce.  Early on, he believes she can be reformed and forgiven, even if she doesn’t see that as a real possibility.  He admires her resilience and skills, and because he is so compassionate, he tries not to judge her for the sins of her past (even though he does have initial reservations about it, he is able to trust in the Force enough to let them go).

But when he wakes up after hosting Thrawn, there is most definitely some spiritual residue coloring his perception, as you know.  Our first hint is this line:

“Something twinged inside him, an immediate sense of concern. Luke wasn’t quite sure where it came from.”

And then it continues to manifest in subtle ways, from being warmed by her compliments, his reaction to her touch, the way he knows how she wants to argue as if they had done it “a thousand times”, etc. 

Luke has the presence of mind to recognize these traces of Thrawn, and while Pryce doesn’t understand it, she also obviously senses something isn’t quite right when he “sounds like” Thrawn.

Poor Luke, complicating his own life to help others (he’s good at that).  But as the ending indicates, he’s ultimately at peace with how things turned out.  However, my intention with the last line regarding Luke’s dreams.was to suggest that Thrawn’s psychic residue may be quite a bit stronger than expected.

Now…about that sequel...

I think at this point it’s fair to say I probably will write it. I went into a lot of detail about it in this old post below (another wonderful ask from @beebee-76) that you can read if you would like spoilers for what is to come.

If you don't want to spoil it, I'll give some more general thoughts:

The point of Dis Manibus was, as I mention in that above post, to get Luke and Pryce to hook up…that was my original and only intention, and well, you can see that didn’t work out (not that I am complaining!  I love when stories write themselves).  But I do feel like there is more to Luke & Pryce's story, especially now that we know a little bit of Thrawn’s influence and love has seeped into our handsome Jedi’s soul.

So the sequel would explore that.  When I came up with the concept for the sequel, fully formed like Athena from the head of Zeus, I decided “well, if I just type it up for everyone on the Thryce Discord, then I won’t have any more desire to write it.”  Well hah, the joke is on me because this is one plot bunny that is not leaving my pasture, just hopping about, grazing, and reminded me occasionally that there is a rich and emotionally very complicated tale to be told. 

In the meantime, if you’d like more Dis Manibus content, I wrote a little drabble from the "someday sequel" here:

and the amazing @blackmonitor did some glorious fanart inspired by it here.

Thank you again so much for this wonderful ask and your kind words—it just makes my week to know you still love it! Readers like you are gifts. Please have this pic in gratitude!

[imperiuswrecked]

It's the end of July, so I hope it's OK asking. a Youtuber I know is doing a series about depictions of Atlantis, and of course, wants to talk about Namor. But he's (and I quote) "struggling to find a definitive comic arch or graphic novel to go with." Do you have any suggestions? (I apologize if you've been asked this before, I'm recovering from a sinus infection and don't have the energy to trawl your blog)

Always alright to ask, it's just been taking me some time to reply to stuff so thank you for being patient, I appreciate it. I hope you have recovered from being sick by now and even if you trawled my blog(s) you wouldn't find all the information you needed because I haven't spoken about every aspect of Marvel's Atlantis in depth and I mainly complain and moan about Marvel being stupid and not world building enough. lol. The wiki gives a linear explanation of Atlantis if you need hard facts and summaries but my view on Marvel's Atlantis is that it's a total mess.

As of my current count there are 8 origins/histories of Atlantis. However I'm sure Marvel will squeeze in a few more that make no sense and totally ignore everything that comes before it in the future. I'll discuss the history and different origins further into this post.

That youtuber is struggling to find a definitive arc on Marvel's Atlantis because there is no definitive arc or series of comics about Atlantis, unlike DC's Atlantis Chronicles (1990) which takes time to set up the history of DC's Atlantis in a concentrated mini series, Marvel's Atlantis is literally an afterthought. Even Nate Moore stated how little worldbuilding there is for Marvel's Atlantis.

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever's Producer; Nate Moore; “But in thinking about from a filming standpoint, what’s interesting about publishing is Atlantis feels very Greco-Roman, vaguely drawn, and Namor’s backstory isn’t as interesting as you want it to be. And this is from somebody who’s read all the Namor books. It was like… it doesn’t have the depth that it could have."

I agree and disagree with Moore, while Atlantis's world building severely lacks depth in the comics, Namor's backstory is very original and very interesting. By backstory I literally mean that, his origin story, his mother and father, grandfather and scheming cousins, going to the surface world, meeting the Human Torch, joining the fight against Nazis, etc., if it wasn't so interesting to see then the character wouldn't have endured all these decades. However Moore speaks about Atlantis in this way to explain why they decided to change Atlantis to Talokan, and as you know I'm very pleased with Mcu!Namor & his world, and welcomed those changes because it finally put the work into building Namor's world. Someday I hope we get to see that 400 page Talokan bible that Hannah Beachler created for Wakanda Forever.

As I mentioned in my "Namor was never white to begin with" meta, Atlantis was introduced in Timely/Atlas/Marvel Comics before Aquaman's Silver Age Retcon. However breaking down the creation of Namor and his people goes a long way into explaining why Atlantis wasn't really focused on in Namor's world and why the change in the movies was necessary to bring Namor back to his original non Atlantean origins.

Bill Everett was a nautical enthusiast, and he had a fascination with Antarctica. In Saga of the Sub-Mariner (1988) Roy Thomas wrote several segments that feature Bill Everett's thoughts, and one important factor is that Everett never intended for Namor to be from Altantis to begin with.

It's interesting, then, that you didn't call your submerged world "Atlantis". Everett: No, I didn't want to, because Atlantis to me was another world, a world that existed and I believe it still does, somewhere. I don't think it's alive, but I think the remnants and relics are there somewhere. I think it was a continent that did exist at one time. But the idea of the submerged continent came from Atlantis.

Subby, Bill, & Me by Roy Thomas (Saga of the Sub-Mariner (1988) #5)

So much of Namor's creatioin is drawn from inspiration; Tha-Korr's City (Antarctic Submerged Kingdom) is inspired by the myth of Atlantis. Namor's wings are a nod to the statue of Mercury/Hermes. "Namor" is "Roman" spelled backwards. Sub-Mariner comes from "Rime of the Ancient Mariner" by Samuel Taylor-Coleridge. If you want more of Everett's history/interviews then I recommend reading Saga of the Sub-Mariner (1988), and Fire & Water; Bill Everett, The Sub-Mariner, and the Birth of Marvel Comics by Blake Bell.

Saga of the Sub-Mariner (1988) #8

Namor's underwater world was never meant to be Greco-Roman even though Everett draws inspiration from the idea of it. The Greco-Roman Atlantis of Namor's world was added after Everett left the comics. However it was only truly reinforced and expanded by Jack Kirby and Stan Lee in the Silver Age Fantastic Four comics.

January 1949 - Sub-Mariner Comics (1941) #31 - The first time Namor mentions that he and his people are descendants of Atlantis. In context Namor is telling Betty a Tall Tale about how gravity was invented and makes mention of his ancestors from Atlantis, by the end Betty is left with wondering what was truth or fiction from Namor's story, however this was the only time Namor makes mention of Atlantis in those early years.

In the Silver Age Namor's world is revamped, the people are no longer green and blue, and whatever colors the printers would decide, now they were a solid blue skinned race of Atlanteans from the lost city of Atlantis that sank during a Great Cataclysm. However if you read the first reappearance of Namor in Fantastic Four (1961) #4 you notice he never says Atlantis, only "My Undersea Kingdom"

Marvel's many Atlantean Origins:

Fantastic Four (1961) Annual 1 we finally get the first origin. Namor, declares to the Fantastic Four that he is from the Empire of Atlantis, and later while Namor is disguised as a human scientist, he tells the world the origin of Atlantis, about his father and mother, and his own birth.

Origin #1: The Atlanteans were a sub-sea race of homo-mermanus, nomads who were born and lived in the sea, and they developed as surface nations do, they settled, built great cities, their people developed and created sciences and weapons, etc. They were a Myth to the surface world.

As Namor's stories continue in Tales to Astonish and The Sub-Mariner, you see the cities are built and the Atlanteans are all dressed as an undersea fantasy Greco-Roman style, they worship Neptune as their god, and speak in a very archaic manner.

In the 70's Bill Everett came back to work on Namor comics in The Sub-Mariner series, however he was struggled with his health due to his life long alcohol addiction, he had quit drinking years ago but his health continued to decline until his death in 1973, and because he was working on Namor comics at the time he wasn't able to complete the required number of pages Marvel wanted, so after the main story Marvel had small mini stories of Namor's youth, and a later a segment called "Tales of Atlantis".

The Sub-Mariner (1968) #62-66

Origin #2: Atlantis was a Island Nation that was caught up in a war with Lemuria, the Deviants & Celestials, which leads to their country sinking into the sea, where later a young water breathing warrior stumbles across the lost city of Atlantis. The warrior has a vision of what Atlantis was, and what it will be, and then decides to go back to his people, the homo-mermanus, and make them give up their nomadic ways to settle in the sunken city and create an empire.

Now this is where things get confusing and never stop being confusing for any fan of Namor's comics. Why? Because Marvel does not have all of the Atlantean History in a neat and tidy comic series like DC does, every instance of Atlantis and its history is split up among several comics series and books, and Marvel confuses things further by including Conan's Era, the Hyborian Age, which is meant to be in very distant past and they have Namor's Atlantis be of that Atlantis and there's Celestials, and Deviants, and Lemurians, and Amazons and on and on. It's a soup of "whatever" thrown in.

This would confuse any reader because so much of the Atlantean history is contradictory. No reader is going to know they need to read Conan to get a backstory on Atlantis before the Fall (The Great Cataclysm). No reader is going to care about the Space War between the Celestials and the Deviants or the Lemurian Deviants, or care about the copy/paste Lemuria which is just Atlantis but in the Pacific Ocean and it sank at the same time as Atlantis did. No reader is going to follow every comic to get the full picture. If we just read Namor comics its confusing enough, let alone adding in more. Not to mention Marvel's additional Marvel Universe books. It's safe to say from now that Atlantis is an afterthought and made up of a patchwork of stories over decades where no one cared about continuity or sense.

After all how is it we went from an evolved sea people to a island continent people who's city fell into the sea and then is found by those same sea people and the warrior is the spirit son of the fallen king and queen. See how confusing that is? But wait, it gets worse.

Saga of the Sub-Mariner (1988) #1

Origin #3: Now it's Deviant Lemuria who challenged the Celestials who punished the Lemurians, and Atlantis is caught up in the crossfire of that war. This origin follows the Tales of Atlantis origin.

This next origin goes more into detail between the Elder Gods, the war between the Celestials & the Deviants, and Lemuria. The important thing to note about this next one is that this is the first major Crossover Event to happen at Marvel comics, by crossover event I mean a comic event that spans several different comic series/characters and this is a very confusing, long winded series, thats is found in the Annuals of different comics, however it does touch on the Atlantean Origin.

Atlantis Attacks/Atlantis Rising (1989-1995)

Origin #4: The War between the Celestials & the Deviants cause Atlantis to fall into the sea. Uncanny X-Men (1963) Annual 13

During this event Morgan Le Fay raises the sunken Atlantis from the Sea and claims that it's actually Avalon, because in Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #62 one of Namor's ancestors comes to him a vision and tells him that all of Atlantis didn't fall into sea and there still scattered islands left around. Later the island of Atlantis sinks into the sea as well.

So as you can see, the origins are just a tower of unstable blocks, every writer comes along and adds something to it. Now its not just Atlantis, Atlantis is also Avalon. Why. Why does Atlantis need to also be Avalon, why must they be connected at all? I think this got retconned later but I honestly don't care to find out.

Now this next one is my favorite origin and imo the one that is uniquely Namor's. It's written by J.M Dematteis and drawn by Liam Sharp. Firstly I regard this as the best Atlantean origin because Namor is directly involved, it's an interesting and original take on Atlantis, it brings in so much lore and artifacts in such a short amount of time and it has Cleito who is Neptune's wife as a goddess whom Namor worships as well. Namor's destiny is tied to Atlantis, and this is the first time we actually see him interacting with his destiny as a Son of Atlantis, it's Avenger, it's Protector.

Secondly, anytime Marvel uses Atlantis in the shared Marvel Universe, they twist it to fit whatever comic they are using it in. In Conan comics, in Hercules comics, etc. there are different stories, and while comics are very confusing, its worse when other characters comics are involved. I personally feel that Marvel tried to make Atlantis's history as linear as possible and just cram in all the origins/history but it doesn't work, you can read the wiki for different Atlantean Ages but for me, if it isn't directly tied to Namor then it means nothing. I'm here for Namor. I'm here for Namor's Atlantis. Which is why this Origin is what I consider to be the true origin because Namor is a big factor in it.

Man-Thing (1997) #7-8

Origin #5: Namor has a vision to seek out Man-Thing, who guides Namor to the lost City of the Golden Gate to retrieve & restore the Nexus Fragment. Here we learn that Atlantis was not one country or one Island Nation, but it was an Empire made up of Ten Kingdoms and had Ten Kings of Atlantis. Cleito is the Divine Mother, wife of Neptune/Poseidon (In the comics Neptune/Poseidon are interchangeable, they are they same character who is called by both names, because Atlantis is a Greco-Roman mash up.). Evenor (seahorse looking deity) is the Guardian God. Here we learn that the City of the Golden Gate was the capital of the Altantean Empire. It currently exists both in and out of time.

Namor is then taken into the past, to the capital city in it's prime, sees Atlantis in her Golden Age, and meets with his goddess, Cleito. She tells Namor: "Come forward Namor, and accept the coveted stone that only the Child of Earth and Sea may receive." Namor is given the Nexus Fragment and hears Cleito's words of wisdom, love, and praise.

Then Namor witnesses the Great Cataclysm, the Fall of the Ten Kingdoms of Atlantis, and sees his people drown in the sea.

All throughout Namor's comics we are told that Namor has a Great Destiny, that he is destined for something, destined to save Atlantis, to save the Seas, to save the Surface World. However in all of the other origins or even in Namor's other comics we do not get any further information of that Great Destiny, except in these two comics we get so much Lore & History; Namor witnesses his Ancestors downfall, and meets his goddess, and for the first time I actually felt that Namor is special. I really love this story and personally I feel this is the best arc for an Atlantean Origin because as I said before Namor is essential to the story, and that's why this story is valuable for his Atlantean Origin. There is more details in the comics, they talk about other artifacts like a Shroud, the past kings/people of Atlantis, etc.

Inhumans (1998)

Origin #6: Triton claims that the Inhumans and the Atlanteans are cousins. Atlantis that was risen by Morgan Le Fay is now home of the Inhumans, Attilan. Inhumans (1998) #9 I don't know or care when the Inhumans and Atlantean cousin origin started and it might have just been mentioned in this series.

And why not, why isn't Atlantis also Avalon and connected to Attilan, at this point I'm just waiting to make sure Atlantis isn't also Asgard as well. /sarcasm. Marvel, we do not need every magical/superhuman place to also be Atlantis. Anyways we aren't done yet.

The Incredible Hercules (2008) #123

Origin #7: The Atlanteans hired Amazons to slay Gorgons for them, instead of paying them their due for their work they killed some of them, and used magic to try and protect themselves from the Amazons retaliation, however the magic was too strong for them so as Atlantis sank into the sea they used their magic to turn their people into water breathers.

Finally we come to the final Atlantean Origin.

Namor: The Best Defense (2018)

Origin #8: Namor travels through tunnels and is transported to a world of water, where the Vodani live. On Vodan he meets the king and his daughter, the princess, and attempts to get them to rejoin their people with the Atlanteans. The Vodan King sets Namor to a test, kill a giant beast, when Namor and the princess do so the King still refuses to join with Namor and attempts to kill him while informing him that all Atlanteans are descended from Vodan. That Vodan is the true homeworld of the Atlanteans.

This origin is my most hated because it goes against everything that I believe Atlantis should be set in. 1. It makes Atlanteans space aliens. I hate that. I hate Atlantis being connected with space stuff. 2. It flies in the face of what Everett intended Namor to be, he wanted Namor to be the opposite of Superman, superman came from another planet so he had Namor be from Earth. By making the Atlanteans from Vodan it severs the last tie Namor has to Earth. After all if Vodan is so great and its a entire world made of water where the Vodani are so safe then what's to stop the Atlanteans from simply returning to their home world? In the comics Atlantis is constantly destroyed by events, and enemies, and bombs, and poisons, so why would they rebuild Atlantis over and over and over again? I just really really hate anything Atlantis being "Space Aliens". I also hate the Celestial & Deviant Lemuria war origin, and I hate the Amazon origin, I dislike the Spirit Son origin too, because in the end it over complicates and doesn't add anything to Namor's Lore.

Throughout the years Marvel has handbooks that explain Atlantis.

The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe Deluxe Edition (1985) #1 - Basically outlines Origins # 2, 3, 4

History of the Marvel Universe (2019) #1 - This Origin also goes along with the Celestial and The Great Cataclysm origins but once again Atlantis is caught in the crossfire of the Lemuria war, and this time Atlanteans somehow survived and Adapted to become water breathers. This differs from the origins of 2, 3, 4 where it says that a race of water breathers were already there but this is also different than origin 7 where magic was used to change the Atlanteans.

Now stories about Atlantis that take place in Atlantis are found in Namor's books, mostly the Silver Age gives the most focus with an Atlantean setting. However many of those plots are the same, Attuma attacks Atlantis, Namor and friends save the day. Krang betrays Atlantis, Namor saves the day. Some other threat comes up and Namor- you get it, he saves the day. Even Atlantis Attacks both the first and second series that have that name do not focus on Atlantis itself. You find some comics have short panels or issues that mention Atlantean History (events that happened after the Great Cataclysm) such as Emperor Thallo outlawing all clones/the cloning process (Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #20). Or Namor having a very bad time in hell (Namor: The First Mutant (2010) #6-7) and speaking with dead Atlanteans rulers like Empress Rithea. We get Namor's childhood in Atlantis as he grows up but to wrap up this already long post about Atlantis; There is no definitive origin. There is no definitive arc, except for one that I actually feel is a comic arc worth reading if people want a good Atlantis storyline.

Suma-Ket & Artys-Gran - Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #30-40

The Suma-Ket Arc begins in issue 30, with Namor, having lost his memories (again) is found by Doctor Doom, who also finds a woman who looks like and claims to be Princess Fen, Namor's long dead mother. As the arc proceeds the readers are drawn into a dark high fantasy story about Suma-Ket, the Prophet King of Ancient Atlantis. Before Namor's time, and before the time of his grandfather, and many before that. Suma-Ket came to "save" Atlantis from the Faceless Ones, demons with no faces, and the people welcomed him not knowing he probably sent the Faceless Ones himself so he could have a foothold into Atlantis. Over time he and his wife, Artys-Gran, overthrew their king and took control of Atlantis and its people. Both of them were sorcerers, Suma-Ket was a Necromancer who could command the Unforgiven Dead, and Artys-Gran was a Bodysnatcher, trading her mummified body for the body of whomever she chose. They slaughtered Atlantean children in their blood rituals, and ruled Atlantis through death and fear. They used blood magic to try and open the gates of the Demonic Elder gods, and needed royal Atlantean blood to do so. Both were banished along with all their loyal servants centuries ago but they return in issue 36 to take Atlantis once more. The art is harsh, but very compelling and I really love this story arc. Suma-Ket arrives in issue 36.

King in Black: Namor (2020) #1-5

This is another series that has a great Atlantean arc, and it's set during Namor's childhood with flashbacks to the present day. I really love this series and can't recommend it enough.

As you know, I love Namor and his world, but I personally feel that Namor's story is more about his character, navigating through two worlds, whose people are a minority and their homes were taken from them. Which is why I'm very pleased with Namor's Greco-Roman Atlantis being brought back to what it originally was, a isolated sub sea nation that sought to protect themselves from the surface world. That's why the Mesoamerican influence works with Mcu!Namor, and why I really feel that we haven't lost anything due to the changes to Talokan when Marvel Comics themselves never really put in an effort for a clear and concentrated Atlantean Worldbuilding.

Anyways, I hope this very long post helps explain things and if you want to check out my art commission of Namor and who I consider to be his Atlantean gods, enemies, and allies then I will link it, and I also commissioned a Talokan art. ( Atlantis / Talokan )

[system-of-a-feather]

Thank you for your long and thoughtful response to the ask I sent in earlier. ; w; (I'm the one who sent the super long ask in asking about late stage recovery.)

It's really reassuring to me that there can still be that sense of supporting one another. I couldn't quite put it into words before, but I think that and knowing we've got each other's backs and we can always count on that, is the thing that most scares me to think about the possibility of losing. I wasn't sure that could still exist if we were ever to fuse. I don't wanna emotion dump in your inbox so I'll leave it at that lol but when you were talking about that part I was like... yeah, that's what I most needed to know. I needed to know that our ability to express care for each other when it's needed wouldn't be lost. So the possibility of fusion someday, doesn't feel as scary anymore -- even if it's not the direction we currently want to go.

Yeah no I totally get it cause that was one of the largest things that terrified me about fusion as well. Growing up we really never had a single adult or family member in our life around to console or care for us and through a lot of therapy and work, our system became very much a family first and foremost that we've learned to realize that we have always had in spite our "real physical" family having not been there. By the time we were developing pretty reliable communication, I began really forgetting that my biological family was my ""actual family"" as I always thought of my parts as my dad, siblings, etc whenever topics like that came up and I'd always have to double take say at the idea that "I don't have a brother". (We only have two sisters, but our system has so many parts that feel like brothers to me so whenever I think about that I'm like 'tf i have like 40 brothers') So the idea of no longer being chronically separate parts scared me shitless cause - for the first time in my life - I felt I had a family and so it was really fucking hard to fathom final fusion without coming to this idea that I'd have to feel alone again.

And cause we were raised feeling very alone in our family for most of our life that was an extremely stressful and triggering feeling after having FINALLY earned and recovered a sense of companionship and belonging with the 'people' that have always been with my my whole life that I had just not been able to be fully aware of and in full acknowledgement of.

And of course, I'm not saying that "YOU WILL LOOSE IT" cause obviously *motions to previous post* it's really hasn't turned out that way - just really saying that its such a real and understandable fear to have. In the moment its kind of like imagining a color that doesn't exist and so you try to imagine it with what you know and its just... hard to put together until you start to get closer to that place in time and life.

But yeah, I will say with a full gut and 100% confidence upon all parts, never once - no matter how little I focus on the parts and just look at the whole or identify as a whole singular person - do I ever feel alone or like my parts that I love and care dearly for that love and care dearly for me are ever NOT here. Never once have I ever felt like I was on my own or that I didn't have anyone internally there to protect, care, support, or love me. Even in the most "zoomed out" whole moments, I never for a second loose that warm, caring intimate relationship I've had with all the parts.

And in the case of "I" - "I" means that it is something that every part agrees on in regards to every other part they've interacted with. Riku, Chunn, XIV, Ray, Lucille, Aderis, Evaline, Aya, Eva, Iris etc etc. Most of the times when I say "I" as Fei, its because it is just something I know is a system wide shared consensus and thing we agree on.

It kinda just sometimes feels like a really big big big group hug or like us all bundling up in a really cozy tent or those little rainbow parachute games they used to play in elementary school where everyone just goes under the parachute

It's honestly a really good time. I've had zero regrets and honestly lately, like the past like week straight, I've been mostly just choosing to mainly be in a state of Fei just so I can enjoy life transitions a little better as a whole and keep a wider view on how to meet our system's needs best cause for those sorts of decisions and all, having a wide lens on life and existence helps a lot more.

That said, I can still grab anyone and everyone and go "YOU - YOUR TURN" and what not (which we do for brief periods here or there, particularly in favorites activites like writing / drawing / DnD making with Riku and exercising with XIV and walks with Chunn)