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uwuwriting · 4 years

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A little early for that w/ Todoroki, Shinsou and Bakugou

Request: hii can i req a hc of todo, shinsou, and bakugou seeing y/n taking care of eri then they’ll be like “i want a baby with you” :D - anonymous

Don’t get me started on the latest BNHA chapter. I just don’t want to talk about it. I’ll try to make a double upload today so maybe expect a song fic after this one Love ya.💖💖💖

masterlist II rules

warnings: fluff

Todoroki Shoto

-It was during Eri’s visit during christmas that it hit Todo.

-You were dressed in a Santa costume just like everyone else with Eri gripping your hand as you took her around the room explaining all about Christmas celebrations.

-It was a very mundane moment if you think about it.

-You were being kind and caring to a child who had suffered immensely at the hands of Overhaul and you wanted to show her what the holiday was all about.

-Now that he thinks of it, it shouldn’t have struck him like it did.

-His chest became warm and fuzzy, his cheeks heating up a bit as he stared at you and Eri.

-Then you kneeled down and brought Eri into a hug, raising her into the air so she could place an ornament on the class’s tree and it was game over for him.

-He prides himself in being a rather collected person but at that moment he lost all sense of control over his emotions.

-His mouth hung open and his chest started to squeeze, knocking the breath out of him.

-He couldn’t help the thoughts of the both of you owning a house somewhere not very far from Tokyo, waking up to you every morning , making breakfast with you and enjoying all the moments you shared.

-Then other images flooded his mind.

-Sitting in the living room as you steadied your toddler, a perfect mix of the two of you, helping them waddle towards him.

-Him helping them place the ornament at the very top of your Christmas tree every time you decorated.

-He could see your smile so vividly he almost thought it was real.

-It was a ridiculous thought for a 16 year old to have and he knew it but in that moment he let himself imagine it.

-Before he knew it you were standing next to him, Eri running off to Aizawa excited to share what she just learned about christmas, arms crossed over your chest as you let out a happy sigh.

- “My santa work is done for the day.”

- “You would make a great mom”

- *pikachu meme*

-He sensed your confusion *and so did your dead ancestors*

- “I want to be next to you when that happens.”

-Girl you got whiplash from this whole conversation.

-You couldn’t decide if you were soft and giddy since he basically said that he wants to start a family with you or if you were terrified because he said he wants to start A FAMILY WITH YOU WHEN YOU’RE BARELY 16.

-In his defense he didn’t say he wanted to start now.

-So you kinda calmed down.

- “I-um thank you Sho. I think you would make a great father too.”

-Blushy blushy baby after that one.

-Some denial sprinkled on top because trauma but blushy blushy boy.

Shinsou Hitoshi

-Okay now third year Shinsou is a stressed Shinsou.

-A third year you is a stressed you.

-And a field day with your now ten year old somewhat trauma free adopted by your homeroom teacher child was what you both needed.

-Shinsou is like a big brother to Eri at this point.

-He has babysat her one too many times to not be considered at least a stable figure in her life.

-You had decided to take a stroll in the park, the autumn air and all the pretty leaves making it a sight to behold.

-Plus it had a pond with ducks.

-And you love ducks.

-Shinsou had brought some bread crumbs so you could feed them and that’s what you were doing when it hit him.

-That weird domesticity.

-You were crouched down on Eri’s height, one arm wrapped securely around her small waist so she wouldn’t fall into the pond and the other was outstretched with a piece of bread, motioning to the ducks to approach you.

-It was a nice scene, picture perfect if you asked him and it did something to his heart strings.

-Just like Todo he imagined walking home with you after a tiring day at your agency, your hands intertwined, matching golden bands circling your ring fingers.

-He imagined a little Y/N being next to you and not Eri.

-Vibrant purple hair sticking out at every which direction as they would throw bread at the ducks maybe even calling him over when one got too close.

-He was so lost in his own thoughts that he hadn’t noticed you standing in front of him, waving your hand over his eyes so you could get his attention.

- “Earth to Toshi!”

-You giggled when he shook his head, his eyes wide as he stared at your smiling features.

- “Eri is hungry-” “You are hungry Y/N-chan!!!” “- and she wanted to go get some good old onigiri from that new shop that opened down the street.” “Lies…”

-You side-eyed the little girl who outed you, her own eyes staring right back in accusation as you let out a sigh saying under your breath “I’m hungry”

-He couldn’t control his laughter as it bubbled from his lips, ruffling Eri’s hair while giving you a kiss on the lips as he circled his arm around your waist and took Eri’s with his other one.

- “Can’t say no to my girls now, can I?”

-It was later that night when he voiced his thoughts.

-You were asleep in his dorm, laying basically on him with your head tucked in his neck as you breathed evenly.

- “It’s a little early to think of kids but I can’t wait to have one with you.”

-And with that he fell asleep his dreams being filled with images of you.

Bakugou Katsuki

-You managed to get him to say that???

-Mister tough as balls?

-Mister imma roundhouse kick you if you look at me with affection in your eyes?

-Someone get this girl a medal.

-But in all seriousness it was a very motherly move.

-You were in your second year, the events of the war with the villains still haunting all of you so everyone was keeping an eye on their loved ones and their classmates.

-Bakugou was no exception .

-Seeing people getting hurt severely, seeing himself so defeated and hurt during those battles had rattled him and he would always linger close to you, a slight paranoia having taken his place in his heart the past few months.

-You understood why he did it, why he hovered next to you most of the time and if you were being honest it didn’t really bother you * except from that one time you went to the bathroom and he called you three times in a row bc he couldn’t see you and panicked*

-Eri was running around with Kaminari and Sero, the three of them playing tag with the one brain cell they all shared at the moment.

-Suddenly, Eri tripped and fell, scraping her knee on the pavement, small tears forming in her eyes but she didn’t let them fall.

-In a flash you were next to her, a hand massaging her knee around the area of the wound while the other one was cupping her cheek, your thumb making small circles on the girl’s cheekbones.

- “It’s just a scratch. See? It’s not that bad.”

-Bakugou was just staring at the scene unfolding in front of him, his immediate thoughts being that you looked so motherly in that moment.

-The concern and the reassurance reminded him of his mother when she would calm him down after he got hurt, before she became a pain in the ass *as he likes to say*.

-Without him even realizing it he made a mental image of your shared family.

-A house in the outskirts, with a yard, maybe a dog running around.

-But most importantly a little demon that looked like you, climbing onto your shared bed on his day off, nestling in between you two as it went back asleep.

-You making breakfast while having them in your arms.

-He really wished he could see that now.

-But he’s a little young and you wouldn’t really like having a baby before finishing high school sooo he kinda buried it.

-He told you about it when you both were in his dorm getting ready for a movie night.

-It was a more aggressive approach but you got the point of his little rant.

- “I want to spend my life with you too Katsu.”

- “SHUT UP SHITTY WOMAN!”

- “OI!”

TAG TEAM AY:

@the-arcana-fan-fic @angelwritings @axerrri @reinyrei @dnarez @storage11037 @wolfkid22 @letscheereachotheron @ezoyscorner @luluwiie @threeamwriting @dark-thoughts-and-red-roses

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bcdwhcre · 4 years

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“Sacrifice” Reader x Adult Trio

Prompt: simply something were to happen on a mission w/ adult trio and one of you has to be the sacrifice.

Warnings: none just sad bc I’m sad

• Hisoka:

You had begged Hisoka to let you come with him on this mission, it had been a while since the both of you worked together and he couldn’t deny that you two made a good team but the more time went on, the more he got over protective with you and letting you come with him was like him having to babysit and do the mission all at once and he couldn’t risk losing you, not under his supervision.

When you finally went on the mission, you realized how hard it actually was until it came down to one last option at the back of your head. You didn’t want to think about it, you couldn’t so you continued to get up and fight with everything you had in you. Hisoka was trying his hardest to keep his eyes on you while also battling the main boss behind the whole operation you two were trying to take down. Hisoka simply thought this would be a fun interesting battle that he could probably easily win but with you here, he had to make sure you were safe above all.

Minutes passed and you were on the ground heaving from how exshaunted and beaten down you were. Your body ached but your heart broke more when you took a glance at Hisoka and seen how hard he was trying- for you. You knew in that second you had to do what you were thinking about earlier. Sacrificing yourself for Hisoka’s safety. Your power that was held inside of you was a deadly weapon, he knew that but what he didn’t know was that the power you held all these years can easily kill you. You kept it locked away for as long as you could, your past with your powerful family was traumatizing and you refused to use the power your abusive father passed on to you but the look on Hisoka’s face, the look you’ve never seen before was fear.

In that moment, it clicked and you knew you had to use it for this and knew you had to keep him alive at all costs. You couldn’t care less about yourself or your own life but Hisoka, you cared for his more. You never knew you could love someone this much that it made your heart ache. You slowly stood up, wiping the blood mixed with tears off your face and had used everything in your power to grab onto the boss and held on as you took everything you had in you to absorb the both of you with the intense power, practically burning you both alive.

Hisoka got knocked down from the sudden explosion, his eyes wide and strands of hair rested over his bloody forehead. He ran over to where you were, his heart racing and panic filled his head. Once he had seen your body, he knew what you did for him. He kneeled down and scooped up your lifeless body, emotionless. He didn’t know what to feel or what to think, you were all he had left. He had pushed the small strands from your face, sighing as the tears threatened to fall from his eyes.

“Thank you, darling.” Was all he said, carrying you away from the scene and through the woods, bringing you back home.

Chrollo:

Chrollo had known you for quite some time and once you joined the spiders, the relationship between you two had blossomed rather quickly. It was unexpected, you had only joined to get revenge on the spiders for stealing precious items from the small town you came from but the more you had talked to Chrollo, the more you realized how much in common you two had and after that it went all downhill.

Your judgment was clouded, the only thoughts left in your brain was of Chrollo and you disappeared from your town years ago to stay with him and be wherever he was but the chain user had gotten to him in ways you didn’t want to believe and the chain wrapped around his heart had prevented him from speaking to the spiders and that had broken you down heavily.

It’s been months since you seen or heard from him and it had sent you in a spiral of sadness and rage to the point where you had gotten into a murderous rampage throughout the city, ripping apart people and burning places to the ground. Feitan had tried his best to look after you but it was no use considering how powerful you truly were and he noticed that there was no hope to tame a wild animal without their alpha, it was pointless.

Chrollo finally got light of what you were doing and it had made his heart ache more and more until finally he decided to do what was needed to be done. To see you. He didn’t bothering caring about the rest of the spiders nor the judgment chain that wrapped around his heart, preventing him from seeing you but as broken as you both were, he wanted to make this sacrifice just to see your face one last time.

He had made the arrangements and made sure he had written letters out to everyone in the troupe and one especially for you before he made his way to the city you were in causing chaos. Once he stepped foot in the city, he was having second thoughts. Did he want to kill himself just to see your face one more time or should he wait until he could get the chain off, would you handle waiting for that long? He wasn’t too sure but his love for you was huge and deep, it was endless and he knew he had to see you and make you stop this madness.

His feet made their way around, trying to find the exact location you were staying at before settling inside and waiting for you. His hair hung over his face and the clothes he wore were just a plain t-shirt and jeans. He was nervous, his hands were actually sweaty for the first time since he first met you. Suddenly, the door opened up and he saw a glimpse of your face and his heart began to race. You both made eye contact and you didn’t think twice before clinging yourself onto him. The hug was tight, your chests pressed against each other before your lips had met.

He knew he had to speed up this process, he knew it was coming in a matter of minutes so he quickly pulled back and made sure to cup your cheeks to keep you in place.

“Listen to me, I don’t have much time. I couldn’t handle not seeing your face or not being able to touch you and I finally realized that my last breath should be with you. You’ve made me open my eyes and see the world in a much better light, for that I’m forever grateful and I want you to live a long happy life, even if it’s without me. Got it?” He had rushed everything out, wiping the tears that had slipped and rolled down your cheeks.

“Chrollo- why,” Suddenly his eyes went wide for a second, the chain stabbing him clean in the heart and the whole time he kept his eyes on you, never letting go and you had to catch him as he fell, gasping for breath as his last seconds were kept focused on you.

“I love you, don’t forget that.” He barely managed to speak before his heart stopped beating and the life drained from his eyes.

You had sat there, holding his lifeless body close to yours as you tried to gather your thoughts and take in what had just happened. He risked his life to see you and for some reason you couldn’t handle that or process it. You knew you couldn’t manage without him and he wanted you to try. You had thought about years ago to when you two first met and had much he’s changed you, definitely made you crazy but in ways you didn’t mind.

Questions flew around your mind, are you going to be fine without him? Look around the city and look at what you did for him being gone for a few months and now he’s- gone forever. You felt stupid, it was your fault he came here and the pain thag swelled up your heart was so painful that it could kill you. It took you hours of holding onto his body to finally come up with a conclusion. As much as you loved him, you didn’t bring yourself to read the full letter he wrote to you, most of it consisting of living on for him and leading the Troupe but deep down Chrollo knew while writing it that the end of this story would be similar to Romeo and Juliet, the both of you dead inside the hotel room and he also accepted that fate.

As you got up from the floor, picking up a knife from your jacket pocket that was on the bed, you made your way back to lay beside him. The ache in your heart grew and grew more as you laid there before finally you made a sacrifice and that was to be with Chrollo. You pushed the knife in your chest, the sharp objecting instantly hitting your heart and your eyes rolled to the side to take one more look at him before the life drained out of you.

• Illumi:

Illumi was never the type to be openly affectionate or caring towards other people. It had actually taken him years to even begin to show you that side and openly admit to somewhat feeling a different way when he was around you.

He was a quiet but gentle soul, that’s what you thought anyway but on the outside he was very cold and mysterious and that’s what you liked about him and that’s what drew you in.

He was very good at his job to say the least, never messed up and never ruined anything, he always got the job done and went back home or went back to wherever you stayed at. This time it was different, he had pushed himself a little too far and put his trust into your hands and had let you come along with him to do a job, assassinate a big well known man.

Illumi had repeatedly told you to stay close and to not get into any trouble and he would do the job, you were basically just a puppy following behind him and kept yourself tight on his trail until you had turned your attention away from him for a second, just one and that’s all it took for you to get yourself caught up in a ugly situation.

The people had taken you in as hostage and tried to use you against Illumi but you knew better than to put your life into his hands, he would leave you if it had to come down to his life. As much as you never said it aloud or wanted to admit it, he was afraid of losing you and didn’t want to put you in any danger.

You had met eyes with his, the cold stare on his face was making it hard to tell if he had any real emotion and if he was actually upset at the situation you got caught in. Your brain had wondered endlessly and you knew that you would be dead and you’ll have to be dead for him to do his job right and get out of here without a scratch.

Your eyes glanced around, trying to pick up the courage to try to fight the guys that held you hostage and you ignored the endless screaming of them threatening to shoot you if you didn’t stop but, you didn’t stop. You kept going, pushing them more and more until the gunshot echoed throughout the building.

Illumi’s eyes stared at you, taking the chance to kill everyone in seconds while they were distracted with you but he was a little too late as he seen your body limp on the cold floor, the bullet killing you instantly.

Illumi was never the type to sacrifice his life for someone else or care for someone but when it came to you, the amount of warmth he felt when he was around you was something new. It was thrilling yet scary in his eyes but he couldn’t shake you off, even when he tried and tried- you always came back.

The emotionless stars upon his face had stayed still, a small frown forming as he stared at you not knowing what to do, what to say. He ruined this mission, maybe if he had trust his gut to not take you and leave you back then you would still be alive. Now he was back to being alone and cold. The feeling of warmth he never felt from anyone, not even his own parents, was swept away in an instant along with your life.

Send requests plssssss

• Masterlist

#hisoka morrow imagines #hisoka morow x reader #hisoka imagines #hisoka x reader #hisoka #Chrollo #chrollo x you #chrollo imagines #chrollo imagine #chrollo x reader #chrollo headcanons #illumi x you #hxh illumi #Illumi x reader #Illumi imagines #hxh x reader #hxh imagines #hxh headcanons

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kuroosweakness · 3 years

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hi lia!!! i’m back hehe~ i have some more kuroo headcanons/scenarios just for you !

if you guys went out to a fancy place where you wore uncomfy shoes/heels, he’d bring a pair of sneakers for you in the car to change into afterwards so you’re comfy

he seems like the typa guy who would like to lowkey match w his s/o, whether it be buying matching converse (like the same color omg) or matching bracelets ;;

ok so if he’s on his phone and lying down on his tummy, he’d love when you lie down on top of him to see what he’s looking at on his phone. he’d also take this comfy position as an opportunity to take cute selfies w your cheeks smushed together :,(( i wanna hug him so bad pls

you two would have this ongoing game of calling eachother increasingly weird nicknames. he’d call you over like “hey, come here kidney bean” and you’d respond w “gimme a sec, my lovely lamp post” and you’d even do this around your friends (and they’d be used to it pls) (other nicknames he’s used for you include: lava cake, shortcake, etc)

for pet names, i stand by the idea that he’d call you angel, precious, pretty, or sweetheart 🤤

he’d ask about your opinions for the littlest things like which socks and tie to wear to work (tetsu pls your socks don’t even show 😩) and he’d want to help you pick out your clothes too bc he thinks he’s incredibly fashionable lmaooo

he’s def the type of guy to cover any hard surfaces w his hand if you’re bending down to pick smth up so you don’t hit your head :(( what a sweetie!!!

if you two are visiting your family, he knows he has to tone down his pda :,) although it’s hard for him (bc he seems like a physical touch typa guy), he wants to be respectful around your parents. he’d hold your hand under the table, or keep his palm on your back, kiss you quickly on the top of your head, or hold on to your belt loops if he wants you close. your parents would find him so endearing and respectful <3

also speaking of visiting your family, i feel like kuroo would do his best to fit in and get along w everyone in your family. i think he yearns for the type of love that comes w being a part of a family since his home life as a kid wasn’t like the other kids. he’d play w your siblings and learn about their lives, talk to your parents like they’re his own, and internally vow to give his future kids a loving family :,)

if you come home in a bad mood or tired, he’d quietly come up to you and wrap you in a warm hug :( and then he’d massage your temples as you sit in front of him and tell him about your day. he’d also take this time to comb his fingers through your hair so you can relax

he’d try to get you flustered by bending down to listen to you when you’re talking >:( and it would work >:( but you get him back by quickly kissing him on the cheek, catching him by surprise >:)

my brain is only full of kuroo now :,) but i hope you enjoyed these, lia!!! and i’m so excited for sumi’s new plushies yayyy (the giraffes are so CUTE) i’m off to bed (hopefully i dream of kuroo so i can come back w more headcanons for you <3)

- [🧸anon]

OMG HI AGAIN your headcanons are also so good :' i love reading these >:(( so much

oh but he totally would :'( but before that, of course he'll have to do some teasing like "you sure you'll survive in those heels tonight?"

yes!! lowkey matching bracelets, shoes, rings, SOCKS. i just know he has a pair of lucky socks 👀

AWW squished cheeks selfies are way too cute :' laying on kuroo's back would be one of my favorite things to do ever

AHAHA THE NICKNAMES PLS "kidney bean" somehow, coming from him, it doesn't sound too bad :D lava cake and shortcake are so cute :'

yes 😌 and of course he'll have unqiue nicknames of your name that he made up :)

YES AHHH definitely picking out the ties and socks!! he likes to make his ties and socks match >:) and of course he'll do the model walk right after you help him pick his tie out

he's so sweet :(((( the way he'll always look out for you :'

YES YES toning down pda in front of family out of respect!! your headcanons are always so good >:( YES !! the little subtle touches~

pls our parents would adore him :'

YEAHH he'll definitely communicate with his s/o's family members like family of his own! his special bond with your parents and siblings :' he knows how to make himself completely irreplaceable >:)

:((((( why. is. he. so. perfect. and. where. can. i. get. him.

AHAHA PLS he'll be on the hunt to fluster you 24/7 and when you fluster him back, he'll be like (⋆////⋆) the whole rest of the hour

thanks to you, my brain is filled with him too :' OF COURSE I DID, i had so much fun reading these and thinking of more <33 hehe sumi's new plushies are ADORABLE. the giraffes aaaah, maybe she'll start having favorites 👀

i hope you dream of kuroo too so you can share them with me :'DD have a lovely rest of your day, 🧸 anon! <3

#lia convos #lia misses kuroo #🧸 anon #🧸anon

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mallowstep · 3 years

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📖 (foxstride)

ask thingy

@foxstride

okay i mentioned this to you on discord but i didn't go into it but. okay. okay. the au where mistyfoot is hawk, moth, and tadpole's mother. this has been just. it's been chewing on my brain and i don't know when i'm going to write it so since u gave me a blank canvas, i'm going to ramble about it for as long as i can.

cw: implied/referenced sexual assault; brief suicidal ideation; standard tigerclan content (abuse, child abuse, starvation, dehumanization, etc.); referenced force feeding

okay oh my gosh okay. this has. so obviously i've been thinking about riverclan lately. a lot. it's rcam. anyway. i don't want. i'm trying to get to the point and not loop around aimlessly for two hundred words but okay but okay. anyway.

i've been thinking of all the different ways i can deeply traumatize misty, storm, and feather. and maybe stone. maybe i'll let stone live at some point. that'd be fun.

right so i've been thinking of that and my ideas are all over the place. i'm going to let primrosepaw live at some point. at one point i'm going to have stormpaw, and maybe primrosepaw or reedpaw (and...what's the other one? is it perchpaw or pikepaw? whatever) the point is i'll have some collection of stormpaw and some or all of mistyfoot's kits escape but not misty and feather so we can do survivor's guilt and.

anyway so i was writing the excerpt for the primrosepaw is definitely there au (it's kind of not Tethered because most of these aren't mutually incompatible like that au could be any of the others), and tigerstar has that dialogue about kits yeah?

so when i was writing it, i was thinking about just. he's trying to dehumanize all of them, right? that's his goal with that line. he's separating mistyfoot from her kits, trying to erase the meaning of their relationships. that's like. that's what i was considering when i was writing it.

buuuuuuut. y'know. my brain is chewing on it. and it just. hm. Hm. what if. what If tadpole, moth, and hawk were misty and tiger kits. hm. hmm. hm.

and so i am just instantly. very on board with this. there's so much potential.

so i Think the point of canon divergence is the rescue attempt. i haven't decided if stormpaw is successfully rescued or not. featherpaw doesn't for reasons i'm circling around to, but stormpaw may or may not. it certainly Matters in a broad sense but i haven't made up my mind, and i doubt i'm going to write Multiple aus about this. i mean i might u never know but it'd b like writing an alternate stolag: i mean i suppose i Could but it would feel weird.

okay almost burnt my dinner i said i'm very this has just been slowly rotting my brain out. i like Angst and it's been a while since i've written any.

okay there was fmtws but really that got me started. i'm not a fluff person. and y'all know that by now.

so Back On Topic. so Anyway after the rescue attempt fails/partially fails, tigerstar takes his anger out at the apprentices being Alive on featherpaw and she gets to. uh. help tigerclan practice fighting.

"Let me see her," Mudfur hissed. "No," Tigerstar said. "I've told you." Mudfur growled. Featherpaw dragged herself to her feet, and Mistyfoot glanced back at her. They would leave they would leave they would leave and then she could lie down again and try not to think. "You're not my leader," Mudfur said, and Featherpaw winced. Mistyfoot could see what was going on, but she was sitting still as a stone. Mudfur pressed into their — Mudfur pressed in, laying a wrapped bundle at Mistyfoot's feet. "Let me—" "No," Mistyfoot said. "Just go." Mudfur dipped his head. Tigerstar's steps moved away from them, but the shouts and arguments surrounding Mudfur were just buzzing noise in Featherpaw's head. She made out, "She's going to die," and she thought, that wouldn't be the worst thing.

thank You featherpaw. you will suffer for the au as a whole. anyway this takes place...i'm not Quite sure but mistyfoot does have a reason for not letting mudfur in. and that reason is she is in Denial about being pregnant.

if mudfur comes in he'll know (i have not forgotten that cats can smell unlike the erins), and mistyfoot is acting in denial. altho she rationalizes it to herself as being for mudfur's protection: runningnose is a medicine cat too, and so tigerstar could off mudfur without much effort.

(also i tend to mix up mudfur and mudclaw sometimes understand i am talking about the riverclan medicine cat, not the windclan deputy. i just mistype them sometimes.)

anyway so she has a legitimate reason (mudfur's continual survival, which is better for her and featherpaw longterm), and she does not want mudfur to know.

yeah.

all in all, this happens before the great battle. mistyfoot fights in it (again, denial), featherpaw and stormpaw are reunited (yes i think i made up my mind), (wait maybe stonefur lives too, and then both pairs of siblings reconnect, and stonefur is like "oh Shit" and. okay yes. maybe. i don't know.)

(there's a Lot. ohh maybe. wait best of both worlds okay. mistyfoot Thinks stonefur is dead. but stonefur doesn't get a proper burial but at the same time riverclan is Not going to go for their deputy on bonepile and even if they do go for it, they're not going to stripe his bones nor are they going to let a Physical Cat Corpse rot in camp. so when firestar and greystripe rescue stormpaw, stormpaw Insists they go back for his body, and then they realize he's Alive but obviously mistyfoot doesn't know.)

(there then i get the Best of both worlds. and stonefur and feathertail are in the Chronic Pain club.)

(also the thing w/ fighting is also what happens in "someday when the world is much brighter". not that Particular scene or in that Particular way, but it does happen. i mean almost exactly in that particular way. but that scene is from a different fic.)

anyway okay moving on i did add too much chili powder to my dinner but that's fine i'm still not over when someone refused to give me more harissa because "it's spicy" like yes i know i guarantee my mom makes it spicier.

back on topic sorry. i've been writing this as i do other things bc i have so much to say about this and i don't want to wait for tomorrow to share this because it's been just Rotting away my brain.

anyway so siblings reunite. it's...terse. it's complicated.

there's some parallels going on right? like because both featherpaw and stormpaw are basically in the mindset of looking after their mentors (which mistyfoot and stonefur feel Terrible about), everyone has survivor's guilt (i don't know what to call like, survivor's guilt when it's not actually survivor's guilt so if someone has a correct word please let me know) except for Maybe featherpaw.

featherpaw might be the Only one here who doesn't have survivor's guilt. i don't really want to explore the one way she could end up with it. that's past my comfort level at the moment.

but stormpaw and mistyfoot are the most physically healthy, and stormpaw and stonefur escaped.

stormpaw: i have not been hurt by this in any way

everyone around stormpaw: you have definitely been hurt by this

stormpaw: i have not been hurt by this in any way

stormpaw and featherpaw become warriors, leopardstar makes mistyfoot deputy (because stonefur is still recovering and also no longer wants the position. mistyfoot doesn't either but she's in denial and she doesn't want anyone else to have it. mistyfoot is visibly pregnant and still kind of in denial at this point. like it's been at least a moon and she is refusing to talk about it.)

right so i think stormpaw's name is going to be stormheart because i don't know it was always weird to me that stormfur and stonefur have the same suffix. like given Everything that's going on it feels weird to me. ig it'd actually be less weird in this, given that stonefur is still alive, but do you know How Close stonefur and stormfur are. they're one consonant cluster off. they're One consonant cluster off.

so leopardstar names him stormheart. feathertail can keep her name because it's pretty.

mistyfoot is a moon away from kitting. she refuses to talk about it. to anyone. whatsoever.

feathertail and stonefur decide to stage an intervention.

(they leave stormheart out not because he's not part of the found family, but because mistyfoot literally will not tolerate a single word about this. like a single word. like she will growl at you if you look at her stomach for too long.

so given the fairly high odds that mistyfoot gets violent, they keep stormheart out of it. she's the least likely to attack stonefur and feathertail.

stormheart finds out about this later and is like "do you guys realize if this went south you had absolutely 0 control over the situation. like what are you guys going to do. you incapable of doing anything to stop her if something goes wrong."

feathertail is like "yes. that's the point."

feathertail is both kind of right and also very internally messed up from being used for "training" when she wasn't allowed to fight back. feathertail also hates if you call her by just her prefix. she does not tell anyone this. misty is aware of this, and she tells stone and storm, and riverclan does eventually figure it out. plus it's not like feathertail is close enough to anyone else for them to call her "feather".

okay i'm getting off topic sorry i've been working on a tpb thing for swtwimb, and the one scene i have is cats making fun of her for not fighting back (again she is not allowed to they might kill her if she does), so they call her "featherkit" and that eventually gets brought down to feather and i'm rambling anyway On topic again.)

so stonefur and feathertail are like. "mistyfoot you are like. a half moon away from kitting. it is impairing your ability to do warrior duties. you need to like. acknowledge this."

anyway after a very terse conversation. after a veeery terse conversation, where mistyfoot is like. very close to just absolutely abandoning riverclan. they get her to admit that yes she is pregnant and yes she needs to stop doing warrior duties for the moment.

she wasn't exactly Healthy when she was pregnant because even tho tigerstar made a Point of making her like. eat enough to be healthy and also not violently attacking her. she had still been starved for...idk long enough for her ribs to show. i'm not sure what the exact timeline on this is yet.

also then After Tigerclan she did not eat as much as she should have because (a) denial and (b) she had been forcefed and so now she's. not doing that.

oh wow i've written long enough for my grammar checker to turn off again. that hasn't happened in ages.

all bets are off from here on out re grammar and spelling.

okay so mistyfoot isn't going to move into the nursery. i believe mosspelt has had a litter of 3 kits, or will have one as we see in asir, but mistyfoot isn't. she's not moving into it. stone, misty, storm, and feathertail share a den. no one else is allowed into it for Any Reason.

so anyway, they expand the den. riverclan as a whole might? i'm not sure who's good at weaving bc i don't have headcanons for this time period. probably not feathertail, but possibly stonefur. hm. anyway, they expand the den, mistyfoot will raise the kits in this den, everyone is on board with this.

mostly because it's this or mistyfoot like. runs away. which obviously no one wants. riverclan is on the side of...the four? riverclan is on the side of the four. even if they're not like, even though the four don't trust them, feathertail and misty especially (stone and storm tolerate it much better). but even tho things are complicated, riverclan is certainly going to do actions. they're certainly going to try to demonstrate their support.

okay so mistyfoot gives birth to her kits, and she is. not feeling good. about it. she's feeling terrible about it actually. she's feeling terrible about things. she doesn't want to name them.

usuuually in this situation, after the queens (collective) decided its in the best interest of the kits to be raised by someone other than their birth mother, the kits would be given to another queen.

but see. feathertail, stonefur, and stormheart are All attatched to these kits. deeply attatched to them. and mistyfoot is not willing to give them up either.

so mistyfoot isn't willing to give them up to another riverclan queen, and feathertail, stone, and storm all Want to raise them, and also don't want to give them to another queen.

the queens confer with mudfur that it is absolutely the worst possible thing they could do to forcibly remove the kits from mistyfoot. like that is the Worst option. they'd be lucky to get the kits alive, feathertail and mistyfoot are likely to abandon riverclan, and if misty and feathertail abandon riverclan, stone and storm will follow.

they're stuck in a standstill for a while. the four eventually do name them hawkkit, mothkit, and tadpolekit. the kits are about a moon old and ready to be weaned. mistyfoot is still extremely tense about the affair, but she's willing to part with them. she's able to recognize that's in the best interest of the kits, mosspelt's litter is about the same age, moving them into the nursery is going to give them a more normal upbringing, everyone is on the same page.

feathertail, who's having a lot of self worth issues, decides that moving into the nursery is her best bet for clan usefulness (which (a) feathertail you cannot keep up with kits and (b) the whole Place she's in is bad to begin with), moves in with them.

the kits decide feathertail is their mother now (they're old enough to understand that she didn't give birth to them, altho i haven't decided if they remember misty as their mother and if they're told any information re their birth parents depends exactly What kind of angst i want to write), and feathertail is. okay with this.

unlike asir, she's not blindsided with the tigerstar-is-their-father reveal, so she does have some issues with hawkkit reminding her of tigerstar, he's not really her Big Bad Trauma Nightmares. she has way more issues with the riverclan warriors directly involved in her abuse.

anyway, i don't know what happens tnp era stuff. i haven't gotten that far yet. maybe this will be another au where hawk and/or moth is a prophecy cat. i'm not sure. i haven't gotten farther than this.

but here you go i started writing this like an hour and a half ago and while i did stop to eat, i also just finally put everything i have for this au on one page and i hope and pray that will stave off the brainrot until i have a chance to actually write it.

#long #like 2.5k words of me just Talking #but this has just been consuming my brain holy shit #thanks for giving me unrestrained access to just talk about it #also like for anyone interested in this ask game #i'm not going to give you something this dark #unless you ask off anon and i know you're okay with that #i already mentioned this to fox #usually i don't talk about anything above pg-13 on tumblr but this has been literally rotting my brain away #i have never meant brain rot so literally #ask #ask game #mine #txt

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xxdragonwriterxx · 4 years

Text

🔥Now & Forever🔥

A/N: RIGHT HERE, STEP RIGHT UP FOR SOME ANGSTY SHIT PEOPLE, BC I APPARENTLY HATE MY OWN HEART. Okay, it’s not all angsty, it gets fluffier towards the end but this one is pretty heavy so be prepared! Inspired by the absolutely fantastic @ackermans-freedom-inc! Go check out their stories if you haven’t already, they are definitely one of my favorites and they are super talented, hence why I was inspired to write this based on one of their fics! Enjoy!

🐉 Song Recommendation: “Tongues & Teeth” By: The Crane Wives 🐉

~~~

(Y/N) suppressed her giggles behind her hand as Levi pressed more kisses to her stomach, humming in contentment as he nuzzled her skin. Shocked wouldn’t even begin to describe how she was feeling, watching her normally stoic husband act so soft. He had always lowered his walls around her, his wife, the one person he felt comfortable being vulnerable around, but he had never shown this much emotion. It was like she was looking at a whole new man, a smile spreading across her lips until they ached as pride filled her chest at how far he had come.

When (Y/N) had first met Levi all those years ago, he was a thug. A criminal who couldn’t have been more than eighteen years old, fighting to survive in a world that had spat on him from day one. She had been out walking her dog that day, enjoying the cool autumn breeze as she had rewarded herself with a couple of hours to relax after acing an exam she had taken earlier that morning. It was her dog that had noticed him first, a handsome black labrador she called Caspian, his ears perked up and a low growl in his throat as the boy who looked to be around her age had stalked towards them, constantly checking over his shoulder as the sirens from distant police cars had wailed louder and louder.

(Y/N) had noticed the look of panic on the boy’s face when the cars had rounded the corner, his face paling even more than it already had been. She had been able to tell he was probably dangerous, had obviously done something illegal, but something about the fear in his expression had twisted her insides more than the knife he could have possibly had and used against her ever would. Making her decision, (Y/N) hadn’t hesitated when he sped by, trying to outrun the cars before they saw him. She had reached out and grabbed his arm, spinning him away from the road and grabbing his coat, simultaneously handing him Caspian’s leash.

“Hey babe, I’m cold, could I borrow your jacket? Thanks!”

She had been impressed that despite his shock, he had managed to shake it off and nod woodenly, playing the part as he had grabbed ahold of Caspian’s leash and shrugged off the rest of his jacket. The cars had sped by, completely ignoring the couple on the sidewalk as (Y/N) had slipped into his jacket and leaned into his body, humming happily and thanking him with a sappy look on her face. It had only been when the police had rounded the corner that she had let him go, grabbing her dog back from him but keeping his jacket draped over her shoulders.

“Why did you do that?”

“You just looked like you needed a break.”

Ever since then, the pair had been inseparable, meeting together more and more until they eventually confessed to each other. Afterwards, (Y/N) helped build Levi up, allowing him to actually make a life for himself and giving him the chance to open up when the emotions he had were too intense for his mask to hide. He was lucky he had so many skills from his time on the streets, allowing (Y/N) to give genuine recommendations to jobs for Levi, until he finally got hired at a restaurant as a waiter despite his complete lack of job experience.

From there, he was able to climb his way to the top, earning his own money and scraping together any job experience he could get until he was finally able to get the education he needed at a reputable university, getting a degree in business and marketing before starting his own company. (Y/N) had continued with her own degree, working to become a criminologist so she could continue to help people just like Levi. Despite their busy lives and completely different worlds, Levi had never forgotten the girl who had given him his start in life and (Y/N) had never forgotten the bad boy who never left her bored or neglected, life always an adventure when she was with Levi, the two getting married a few years after they both had stable jobs working for their respective careers.

More kisses fluttering against her skin brought her out of her thoughts, another smile flashing on her face as she looked down to see Levi pressing his face against her abdomen, his arms looped around her waist as she leaned back into the headboard of their bed.

“Levi,” (Y/N) giggled when he started murmuring soft words of love to her stomach. “There isn’t even anything there yet, not really, it’s only been a few weeks.”

“I know,” Levi said against her still flat stomach, his husky words sending sparks along her spine. “But it’s still something. I just…, I don’t know, I guess I’m just happy to finally have a family.”

(Y/N) was a pile of goo at his sheepish confession, running her fingers through his soft raven locks as she sighed happily. “I’m really excited too, Levi, and I’m happy you’re happy.”

“Oh, I am,” Levi purred, making (Y/N) shift as his deep voice made her core melt. “I’m scared, really scared of fucking this up, or something going wrong, but I’m really happy. Thank you.”

(Y/N) leaned down and he met her half way to give her a warm kiss, her fingers lightly scratching his scalp as he sat up more to better tangle his tongue with hers. Her soft laugh at his enthusiasm quickly turned into a choked out moan, her hands tightening in his hair as he crawled to his knees, pressing her back against the headboard.

“Hmm? What’s this?” (Y/N) asked coyly, breaking the kiss and using one hand to run her fingers down his chest, teasing just shy of his groin before trailing them back up, smiling at the half-hearted glare he threw her.

“I was just thinking…” Levi murmured, leaning in for another kiss. “That I should show some appreciation for my beautiful wife,” he kissed her again. “A reward for this wonderful gift she has given me.”

“Oh?” (Y/N) said breathily. “And what if I wanted to give my amazing husband a reward for all of his hard work? I didn’t create this baby on my own, you know.”

Levi gave a low, keening moan at the feeling of her sucking on a spot just below his ear, closing his eyes and gripping her waist tighter when she started circling her finger around the arousal growing in his pants.

“I think,” he panted. “I have a solution that will work for both of us.”

“Oh yeah?” (Y/N) asked cheekily, biting her lip when she felt his hands leave her waist to creep under her shirt, his rough, warm palms cupping her soft breasts. “Why don’t you show me what it is?”

Levi gave a wicked smile. “With pleasure.”

__________________________

Levi didn’t know what time it was, only that it was late, going by the darkness that still filled their room despite the opened shades, but he found he didn’t even have time to think about it as he felt the cool edge of a blade against his throat. He didn’t even have to open his eyes to know what it was, the feeling ingrained in him from his days as an orphaned boy on the streets. His entire body froze but he kept his eyes closed, not wanting to give his attacker any further reason to sink the blade deeper into his throat. He felt a few tiny drops of blood seep from where the knife rested against his skin, and resisted swallowing to keep from rubbing against the sharp edge.

Without thinking, his left hand immediately flew out to lay across (Y/N)’s body, not caring about anything but protecting his wife to the best of his ability, even with a knife to his throat. While he’d like to avoid it, he knew he’d gladly die to save her, even if that meant never getting to meet the little bundle of joy he had been eagerly waiting for ever since (Y/N) had told him, tears in her eyes while she beamed at him.

“Thought you could keep me pinned down forever, huh?”

That voice, filled with a seething fire, coupled with the feeling of his arm hitting nothing but thin air and empty sheets hit him simultaneously, his eyes flying open to see the face of his wife hovering over him, one hand holding the knife to his throat while the other was holding a sheet against her body, hiding her naked form.

“(Y/N)? What the hell?” Levi managed to spit out, trying to wrap his brain around the situation.

“What? Didn’t think I was strong enough to fool you? I can’t remember what happened last night, but that doesn’t mean I’m too confused to defend myself.”

“Defend yourself? (Y/N), what are you talking about? Defend yourself from who? Me? I’m your husband, why would I-”

“You are not my husband, I’m not married. Don’t try to fool me with some cheap ass tricks. Who the fuck do you think you are?”

Levi flinched at the pure hatred in her voice, but forced himself to stay calm. Something was obviously wrong, but he wasn’t going to get any answers by panicking.

“(Y/N), it’s me, damn it! It’s Levi! We’ve known each other since we were teenagers, we’ve been married for four years and we are having-”

“I said to stop pulling that cheap shit on me!” (Y/N) screamed at him, her teeth gritted as she pressed the knife ever closer to his throat. Levi’s breath hitched as he fought the tears back, but he was fighting a losing battle. What was going on? Why was she acting like this? They had had their fights just like any other couple, but she had never screamed at him like this, like she loathed him with every fiber of her being.

“It’s not a trick, (Y/N), I love you!”

“You can’t love someone you pulled out of a bar for a quick fuck,” (Y/N) spat. “Was that what happened? Or did you break into my house and knock me out when I wasn’t looking? Or did you drug me? Get me to trust you just enough to drink something you gave me before dragging me to your house to use as you please?”

“(Y/N), I would never use you-”

“Then what the hell do you suggest happened!?” (Y/N) shouted, her voice cracking a little as she spoke. “I’m not an idiot, I can feel the aching between my legs, the bites on my neck, the dried spend on my inner thighs. Not to mention, I woke up naked. What? You just wanted to bring me to your bed, strip me down, and then watch me sleep? You had no desire for sex at all when you brought a strange, unconscious woman into your house and ripped her clothes off?”

Her voice was starting to shake now, her breathing heavy and tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She still had that fiery look, like she wanted to kill him, but she was starting to lose her composure. Her whole body shook, and she had to keep readjusting her grip on the sheet she held to her naked form, the cloth slipping from the sweat that was starting to coat her palms.

“You can lie all you want, make up this bullshit about how we’re happily married and I’m just delusional, but I won’t fall for it. You’re a fucking monster, you know that? I didn’t ask for this, to be taken advantage of when I was incapable of making my own decisions or protecting myself. If I wouldn’t go to jail for it, I’d send you back to the hell you came from right now,” (Y/N) pressed the blade slightly deeper into his skin as she spoke, her eyes glittering with fury and a desperate sadness.

But no matter how far she sank that knife into him, it was the words she spoke that stabbed him deeper, sinking into his heart and twisting it until he almost couldn’t contain the will to cry out. Tears streamed down his face uncontrollably now, his expression displaying his need for a solution, anything to make this nightmare end. Not just for himself, but for (Y/N). He absolutely loathed the idea of her thinking he’d ever do anything to her that she was uncomfortable with, but he hated the idea of her thinking it was real more. If she truly believed he had assaulted her, used her for himself, that could prove to be more traumatic than anything he was dealing with currently.

“(Y/N), I-”

“How the fuck do you know my name? You keep saying it, did I tell you before I was knocked out?”

“(Y/N), listen, you were never knocked out! I know your name because I’m your husband! You have to believe me! I would never hurt you, never!”

“I warned you,” (Y/N) said, leaning so close to him he could feel her breath hitting his face, her fingers twitching on the handle of the knife as if she were fighting the urge to slide it across his throat and end this once and for all. “Not to tell me this fucking story all over again. I would remember if I was married, that’s not something you just forget overnight. I don’t really care about what happened to lead up to this, the point is that you did what you did, and now you’re going to pay for it.”

Levi didn’t know what was going on, but he knew he had to do something before things got even worse. Swallowing the bile that rose in his throat at the thought of what he was going to have to do, Levi closed his eyes and brought his knee up, hitting her ass and sending her flying forward. Tilting his neck to avoid the bite of the blade, he used her state of unbalance to knock her off of him, flying out of bed and slamming the door to their bedroom behind him. He held the door closed as she pulled and pounded against it, whimpering quietly with every scream of hatred she spewed at him. Reaching over, he managed to grab a nearby chair and used it to jam the door shut, confident she couldn’t get out. He thought about the windows but knew she wouldn’t be able to escape through them, their bedroom on the top floor of their house too high off the ground for her to jump or even climb down safely.

His hands were shaking as he quickly dialed the numbers of his two closest friends, not even apologizing for the late hour as he quickly explained the situation to both of them. He hoped that with Hanji’s medical experience as a doctor and Erwin’s experience as a detective they would be able to shed some light on what could possibly be going on with his beloved wife. Hanging up at their promises to come immediately, Levi slumped against the door to their bedroom, his head in his hands as he finally let himself cry.

___________________________

Transient Global Amnesia. Levi stopped breathing as Hanji gently placed a hand on his shoulder, sitting him down in a nearby chair. It was nothing more than a sudden, spontaneous bout of amnesia that wasn’t triggered by a stroke or neurological disorder. There was no real cure for it and while it tended to only be temporary, that wasn’t always the case. He swallowed hard, fighting the urge to pass out.

“How is she?”

“She’s… coping.”

Levi visibly cringed at Hanji’s words, and while the friend part of the brunette almost immediately regretted telling him, the doctor part of her knew he needed to know the truth. At the moment, (Y/N) did not remember anything about Levi, or where she was, or her relationship to him. They hadn’t even told her about the baby yet, too concerned she’d do something rash if she found out before she had been calmed down.

“What is she doing now?” Levi asked quietly, his voice barely a whisper.

“Erwin is with her right now. He’s trying to convince her that the neighbors heard a commotion and called him to investigate, which led to your “arrest” and that we are here to save her.”

Levi snapped his head up, his eyes furious and his mouth opening to speak when Hanji interrupted him.

“I know what you’re going to say, Levi, and don’t worry, we have a script planned to prove your innocence should her amnesia continue so she doesn’t continue to think you took advantage of her. But this is the only thing we could think of that would let us get close to her without her thinking we were “in league” with you. Do you understand? We didn’t want to paint you in a bad light, but we had to if we wanted to keep her from hurting you or herself.”

Hanji avoided bringing up the idea of the baby getting hurt too, knowing that would just pour more salt on the wound. Levi wasn’t stupid, it was clear he was very aware of the fragile situation they were all in at the moment, it wouldn’t help to make him even more stressed with information he already knew.

Levi was quiet for a moment but eventually nodded, closing his eyes and placing his head on his fist, his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned forward in his chair, trying to process everything he was being told without breaking down. Hanji took a deep breath, preparing for the worst.

“And um…, I’ve organized everything so that (Y/N) will come to live with me for a while. I want to keep an eye on her and it’s obvious she can’t really stay here.”

To her surprise, Levi just nodded, letting loose a silent sob that Hanji pretended not to hear, for his benefit. When his body started to shake, she placed her hand on his shoulder again, using her other hand to lift his chin up so she could look into his eyes. Her heart clenched when she saw the pain and despair swirling there, her normally stoic best friend showing more vulnerability than she had ever seen him display for anyone other than the woman who currently thought he was a monster.

“Listen, Levi. I promise you right now, both as a friend and as a doctor, that I will do everything in my power to make sure everything goes back to normal. I can’t promise that it will, but I do promise that I will work until I die trying, alright? You may feel like the world is against you right now, but you are not alone.”

Levi closed his eyes and nodded, murmuring his quiet thanks as Hanji made to leave the room, her phone pinging with Erwin’s text saying he finally got her calm enough to transport. “Make sure to stay in here until we are gone, okay Levi?”

Levi didn’t respond as Hanji left the room, only sitting with his head pressed against his fist as he listened to the sounds of Erwin leading (Y/N) to Hanji’s car, each murmur of comfort from his best friends to his wife like another dagger to his bleeding heart.

_______________________

“(Y/N)? Are you okay in there?” (Y/N) heard Hanji call from behind the bathroom door. Closing her eyes, (Y/N) answered that she was fine, too busy with fighting another wave of nausea to formulate the words necessary to convey that she was indeed, not fine.

When she finally felt the roiling in her stomach calm down, (Y/N) flushed the toilet and washed her mouth out, nearly vomiting again just from the taste on her tongue. When she was finally certain that she could close her mouth without gagging, (Y/N) took a deep breath and sat on the now closed toilet lid, trying not to cry.

Hanji had been unbelievably kind and supportive, letting her stay at her house until she got better, using her medical skills to check her over in her comfortable living room rather than in the daunting, harsh environment of a hospital. She had let (Y/N) borrow her guest room and had provided her with any clothes she had needed during her stay. She felt…, comfortable. Safe. But she couldn’t deny that she was still shaken after her whole ordeal with the raven-haired man.

While it was clear he had known her name, she didn’t know his; didn’t know anything about him other than he had assaulted her and been taken into police custody for it. While part of her was viciously happy at the thought of him behind bars, another more confusing part of her was screaming at her to help him, almost as if something inside her knew him in a way the rest of her didn’t. She quickly shook off the feeling, focusing on the satisfaction of knowing he was getting a just punishment for his actions, hoping she’d be the last in what she assumed was a string of his victims.

But even when she was being taken care of by a nice, talented doctor, and her captor was being sent to jail, and she had a handsome detective on standby to protect her at a moment’s notice until she was cleared by Hanji to go home, the incident still made her want to scream, to cry, to curl into a ball and forget everything. She could only find some semblance of comfort from the thought that she couldn’t remember the assault, too drugged out or unconscious to remember any of what had happened that night.

But a week and a half had passed since then, and with each day of consistent vomiting, and hormone changes, and random food cravings, (Y/N) had the horrible suspicion that she was pregnant. Again, a strange part of her felt warm and tingly at the thought, as if she had planned for this, making her groan in pain and frustration. She really hoped she didn’t have some resemblance of Stockholm Syndrome, his looks and charisma making her feel as if she were in love with him despite what he had done to her.

Another knock sounded on the door, followed by Hanji’s concerned voice. “Are you sure, you’re alright, (Y/N)? I’m worried about you, hun.”

“I’m coming,” (Y/N) said, her lip twitching at the concern in Hanji’s voice. She couldn’t express her appreciation for the surprisingly energetic woman, how sweet she was without pitying her, how gentle she was without treating her as if she were made of glass.

Washing her hands quickly, (Y/N) unlocked the door and joined Hanji in the kitchen where she had made her some pancakes with bacon, no eggs at (Y/N)’s insistence after the smell of them on the first day had sent her running to the bathroom.

“Thanks again, Doctor Zoe,” (Y/N) said when the woman forked the bacon onto her plate, the doctor waving her hand dismissively at her gratitude.

“It’s really no problem, (Y/N). It’s my job to take care of you to the best of my ability and that’s what I’m going to do. You’ve been through a lot, you deserve to feel comfortable and relaxed,” Hanji said, trying not to cringe at the way her once best friend called her name so formally. It wasn’t a lie, she had been through a lot, it just wasn’t what she knew (Y/N) was thinking.

The thought made Hanji want to cry, knowing how much it was hurting both of them. She had met with Levi the other day under the guise of getting more groceries, wanting to check on him as both a friend and a doctor, only to find a wreck of the once proud man she knew. She had come into his home, an alarm bell going off in her head when she noticed he hadn’t cleaned in days. Finding him on the couch, messy and hunched over, his clothes wrinkled and his hair a mess as he stared at a photo of the two of them horseback riding together, had almost broken her. She had relented a little, giving him a hug despite the grunt of annoyance he gave, a watery smile forming on her lips as he still managed to show his disdain for her hugs, but it had quickly disappeared when he started sobbing quietly, his shaking shoulders telling her before his tears did.

Shaking her head a little, Hanji pushed the image to the back of her mind, using it to fuel her determination to get (Y/N)’s memories back rather than letting her depression take over. She had to do this, for both of them, no matter what.

“Hey, Doctor Zoe,” (Y/N)’s quiet voice snapped Hanji out of her musings, prompting her to look around the corner from where she had been cleaning the kitchen to look at her patient, fighting the tears back at how weak she looked. So different from the best friend she had known and lost.

“Yes, (Y/N), what is it? Are you hurting somewhere?”

“Doctor Zoe…, I think I might be pregnant.”

Hanji froze, her eyes widening.

Shit. Shit.

Hanji still hadn’t told her, had been too afraid to. She hadn’t even known how. How do you even begin to explain to a person that they were pregnant with a baby they had planned for and consciously made with a person they now believed to be a sexual predator? She had spent days mulling over how best to explain it to her, but now all of that was thrown out the window. She had been so focused on everything else, she hadn’t even considered the fact that (Y/N) might figure it out for herself.

(Y/N) noted the look on Hanji’s face, her eyes narrowing. Her lips parted for a moment, shock flying across her face before she schooled her expression, her eyes hard. “Doctor Zoe…, you know, don’t you? I need you to tell me the truth.”

Hanji swallowed hard and made her way slowly over to the table, (Y/N) standing up to meet her half way, her gaze never leaving her doctor’s face.

“Doctor Zoe, tell me right now. Am I pregnant with that monster’s child?”

____________________________

Hanji took a deep breath as Erwin parked the car in front of Levi’s house, a shuddering sigh passing through the detective as well.

“Thank you for being here, Erwin,” Hanji whispered, unrestrained tears streaming down her face.

“It’s no problem, none at all. I know you’re going to need some serious help with this one.”

Hanji hummed noncommittally, her brain screaming at her to turn around, to drive away, to hide in a dark corner and cry. She had no idea what to expect other than sheer chaos, but she knew she had to do this. If she didn’t do this now, she knew nothing could compare to the sorrow he would feel later.

“Let’s go,” Erwin said, placing a hand on her shoulder, his icy blue gaze meeting her chocolaty brown ones, his anguish apparent.

Hanji nodded, placing her hand over Erwin’s before they both slid out of the car, rejoining to hold each other’s hands, supporting each other so they could support their hurting friend, as they made their way to the door.

Entering without knocking, knowing it was unlocked, Erwin and Hanji didn’t have to look to know where to find Levi, heading straight for the living room where he had spent the past week and a half, never gaining the strength nor the desire to go anywhere near their bedroom. They found him looking blankly out the window, not even turning around when they entered the room.

“Any news?” Levi asked, his voice devoid of emotion.

“Actually, yes,” Erwin sighed.

“Really!? What is it!?” Levi suddenly perked up, racing over to his friends, his eyes wild as he looked between them, not daring to let hope sing in his veins in case it wasn’t the news he was looking for. After a moment, he was glad he didn’t.

“Levi,” Hanji choked out, tears springing to her eyes as she spoke. “She found out about the baby, but her memories still aren’t back to normal. She…, she wants to… she wants to terminate it.”

Levi felt the world shift beneath his feet. Stumbling back, his chest was heaving and his heart was screaming as his body sagged against the wall.

“No…, no, no, no!” Levi whispered over and over again, shaking his head. Not their baby, not the bundle of joy they had been trying for for so long, not the light that had surprised them a month ago with their presence, making Levi and (Y/N) feel the happiest they had ever felt. “No, no, no, no…”

Hanji hugged herself, hanging her head and ignoring when her glasses clattered to the floor, not even checking for broken lenses like she usually did when they came off her face. “A-And she said that…, she said that I’m the only one she trusts to do it…,” Hanji gasped, tears streaming down her face in waterfalls.

Looking up, she caught Levi’s eye, his expression unreadable as she watched him. The intensity and uncertainty in his gaze broke the normally energetic, steadfast woman, Hanji sinking to her knees as she sobbed into her hands.

“Levi, I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry! I don’t want to do this, I don’t want to take this from either of you, but I don’t know what else to do! I know that if I don’t agree to it that she’ll find someone else, someone who doesn’t know the situation and won’t hesitate to perform the procedure. I’ve told her for now that I have to think about it since I don’t do those procedures often and I want a full health report back from her psychologist, but I can only put it off for so long,” Hanji sobbed, leaning into Erwin when he kneeled down to hold her close, petting her hair and making soft cooing sounds.

“Normally, I wouldn’t have a problem with it, it’s the woman’s choice, it’s her body, but this situation is so fucked up! I know this isn’t what (Y/N) wants because she made this baby with the man she loves, her husband, and if she gets her memories back and finds out what I did to her-”

“Hanji,” Levi’s voice snapped her out of her ramblings, shocked to find Levi kneeling in front of her, his hand titling her chin up gently. “This isn’t your fault. Thank you for everything you’ve done in taking care of her…, and me.”

Levi looked away, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. Reaching up with his free hand, he touched the barely noticeable mark that was on his neck from when she had cut him.

“I want you to know that it’s okay. You’re right, this situation is fucked up, but we’ve been backed into a corner. As much as I hate it, as much as it will fucking kill me to have this happen, I will not force her to go through with something she doesn’t want. Especially something of this magnitude. We can wait for her memories to come back, keep trying harder to help her, but if they haven’t returned by the time her psychologist reports come back as sound…,” Levi couldn’t bring himself to say it, but his friends knew what he meant.

Leaning forward, Erwin and Hanji opened their arms and brought Levi in close, the raven-haired man tensing for a moment before melting into their comforting hold. All three of them sat on the floor of Levi’s living room, the dying sun staining the wood red as they cried, holding each other tightly as they silently begged for things to finally get better.

_____________________________

(Y/N) gave a wry smile as Hanji handed over the reports she had gotten in the mail, all of them from the psychologist that had carefully examined (Y/N) after her incident. While most of them had random information about therapists in the area and available medications from trauma, the page she really focused on was the paper that declared her mentally stable, even after such a traumatizing event. She would still need to heal, but she had been deemed mentally and emotionally capable enough to make her own decisions.

(Y/N) subconsciously placed a hand over the very slight swell of her stomach, letting out a sigh as she looked up at Hanji. “Thank you Doctor Zoe, for everything.”

Hanji merely nodded, not trusting herself to speak as she shook (Y/N)’s hand, as if she hadn’t spent years hanging out with (Y/N), going out to bars together, and taking some of their general education classes together when they first started college. As if she hadn’t gone to (Y/N)’s wedding and gotten drunk off her ass at the reception, giving one of the most hilarious and simultaneously heartfelt speeches she had ever given, much to (Y/N)’s entertainment and Levi’s embarrassment.

Hanji couldn't stop it then, the tears springing to her eyes before she could hold them back. She could see (Y/N) tilting her head in confusion, could see her eyes widening in alarm through her blurred vision, but she didn’t have the ability to explain, her throat closing up.

Before (Y/N) could even ask what was wrong, Hanji launched herself at the poor girl, ignoring her squeak of surprise as she held her close, sobbing into her shoulder. “(Y/N), I’m so sorry, I am so so sorry…,”

“What the hell do you have to be sorry for?” (Y/N) asked incredulously, only making Hanji cry harder.

“Hey.”

Hanji opened her eyes at (Y/N)’s soft voice, blinking at the sight of her once closest friend leaning down in front of her, holding her face in her palms. “Why are you crying?”

Hanji sniffled and managed to swallow the lump in her throat, forcing the words out. “I just…, I know this will sound strange but,” Hanji sighed. “I love you, (Y/N), and I’m going to miss you.”

It was like (Y/N) was struck by lightning, the words clanging through her, her entire body tingling as she froze. Everything. She felt, heard, saw, everything. She remembered. She remembered going to college with Hanji, hanging out with her on the weekends as they studied together and teased each other about their various crushes. She remembered meeting Erwin when Hanji brought him around for dinner one night after she had been pulled over by him on the way to (Y/N)’s house, the dazed cop not expecting to get a date and a free meal out of giving someone a speeding ticket.

And she remembered Levi. Her beloved husband. She remembered meeting him, getting to know him, going on dates together, their wedding, and of course, the day she told him about her pregnancy, the way he had smiled the widest she had ever seen, tears in his eyes as he crushed her to him, thanking her over and over again for giving him the family he never had as she beamed bright enough to rival the sun.

Hanji had felt (Y/N) stiffen, heard the gasp that had ripped from her throat and quickly released her, berating herself for letting her emotions get in the way of her logic. (Y/N) still had no idea who she was, it was as if a near stranger had given her a hug and claimed they loved her. Of course she was freaked out, and after everything she was already dealing with, this was the last thing she needed.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry, that was a really unprofessional thing to do, I know you’re probably confused and-”

Hanji was cut off by the feeling of (Y/N) wrapping her arms around the doctor’s middle and holding her close. Hanji’s eyes were wide and she held her breath, hardly daring to hope. “(Y/N)?”

“Hanji, it’s me, I remember! I remember everything!”

“Y-You do!?”

“I do,” (Y/N) said, lifting her head and looking up at her best friend, her eyes shining brightly with love and recognition.

“(Y/N)! YOU’RE FINALLY BACK!” Hanji screeched, hugging her friend back tightly, making sure to stay aware of her slightly extended belly.

“I’m back,” (Y/N) murmured, rubbing her face into Hanji’s jacket, relishing in the feeling of knowing her best friend again.

“How?” Hanji asked in awe, her eyes shining with fresh tears of relief and joy.

“Your words! When you said, ‘I know this will sound strange, but I love you’, it snapped me out of it! Those were the words Levi used almost exactly to confess to me when he finally realized he felt something more for me than just friendship,” (Y/N) said, beaming brightly.

“I’m so glad you’re back, (Y/N), I missed you so- OH MY GOD, LEVI!” Hanji suddenly screamed. “He doesn’t know yet! We have to go tell him right now!”

(Y/N) immediately pushed away from Hanji, having completely forgotten in her moment of clarity and excitement that Levi was still alone at their house, had been for two weeks. Scrambling to the car, Hanji wasted no time in throwing the car into reverse before tearing out onto the road, calling Erwin as they drove.

____________________________

Levi was staring out the window when he heard his door explode open, causing him to glance back despite the fog that rested over his mind and body. He figured maybe Hanji had finished with the procedure early and was coming to console him, or maybe it was Erwin, coming to make sure he didn’t do anything brash.

When he turned, he found he was partly right, his two best friends standing in the entryway to his living room, but for the first time in weeks, they had silly grins on their faces, their eyes bright with joy and tears of relief.

“LEVI!” Hanji screamed. “(Y/N), she remembered! She remembers everything! (Y/N) is back!”

Levi’s eyes widened and his body tightened, waiting for this to just be some sick dream. His breath caught and he struggled to get the words out, to ask for the confirmation he needed, to make sure what they were telling him was true.

“Levi!?”

That voice. Full of concern and desperation and-

Love.

He hadn’t heard her voice sound like that in so long, and his body went weak at the sound of it. “(Y/N)!?” His voice was strained with his desperation to see her.

“Levi!”

Tears immediately sprang to his eyes when his wife finally rounded the corner, her own eyes widening at the sight of him. Letting out a strangled cry, (Y/N) bolted at him, Levi rushing to meet her head on, before crushing her to him, his arms wrapping around her in a way that told her he was never letting go.

They were both sobbing, Levi crying into her hair as she cried against his chest, scrunching the fabric of his shirt in her fists. Levi was quieter than (Y/N) in his relief, but filled with no less emotion, his heart finally being pieced back together at the feeling of his beloved wife back in his arms again.

“Levi, Levi, oh gods, Levi,” (Y/N) whispered over and over again between sobs. “I am so fucking sorry for everything I put you through, for everything I said, none of it was true, I promise. I don’t know what happened but I remember you now, and I love you and I missed you so much. I am so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Levi muttered into her hair, his deep voice calming her fried nerves. “It wasn’t your fault, I’m here now, and I’m never letting you go again, do you understand me? I love you so fucking much, baby.”

(Y/N) buried her face even deeper into his shirt, her body shaking against his in her relief as Levi murmured “I’ve got you,” repeatedly, gently rocking her from side to side. Hanji and Erwin watched for a moment before leaving to give the couple some privacy.

“Is the baby okay?” Levi asked after a while, pulling away only to check her all over, his hands gently feeling over her skin with featherlight touches.

“Yes, yes, the baby is fine,” (Y/N) said, a tiny bit of bitterness in her voice as she remembered what she had asked Hanji to do before her memories came back. “I can’t believe I almost-”

“Shhh, don’t think that way. You had every reason to want to when you were in that situation, but you’re here now and we are all safe.”

Levi brought her back into a tight hug, the two of them sinking down onto the couch together, (Y/N) shifting to curl up in his lap.

“I love you, Levi, I love you so much. I’m sorry I ever called you a monster, and said those horrible things about you, and t-tried to c-cut you…,”

“(Y/N), remember what I said? It wasn’t your fault. You can’t have any regrets, alright? I’m okay, you’re okay, the baby is okay, and we are all together now. I’ve got you, sweetheart, I’ve got you both, now and forever.”

#aot levi #attack on titan #attack on titan x reader #captain levi #captain levi x reader #levi ackerman #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi ackerman x reader #levi attack on titan #levi fanfiction #levi x reader #snk imagines #snk x reader #snk fanfiction #snk levi #snk #shigeki no kyojin #levi heichou

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lgbtqlegends · 3 years

Note

I adore every angsty thing you write, so I come to you with this request:

Headcanons for if Bishop had brainwashed Sara and made her either forget the other Legends or just turn against them? Bonus points for the aftermath after she’s back to normal.

aww thanks!! i'm glad you enjoy all the angst i write!! thanks for the ask n hope you enjoy! (ps sorry it took a while to answer)

also okay so like,, I'm not sure if you wanted these headcanons to be like,, "sara was returned to the ship already brainwashed & clearly turned against the other legends" But,,, reading this prompt has sparked,, a bit of a different, more angsty idea (still the same premise, just a bit of a twist on the when). and, well, i'm sucker for angst so,,

-okay so like. bishop altered her when he cloned her. we Know this. he spliced her DNA with an alien's DNA, obviously, but like. also. we know he has the capability (and no moral or ethical objections at all) to alter other stuff, ie he altered his own pain receptors. so like, it begs the question: what else could he have changed? what else could he have altered that sara didn't notice?

-like, okay, let's be real, bishop would have absolutely No qualms about coding sara's brain to make her turn against the legends at any given moment. and sara would have no idea. like,, he could've coded her brain to make her turn on the legends at the snap of his fingers. he clearly has no moral objection to doing so, and with the way the whole thing has been thus far explained, it sounds like a plausible thing that he couldve done

-so, anyway, onto the rest of the headcanons, assuming that this would be the reality: bishop altered sara's brain and 'coded' it to make it so that he could make her turn against the legends at any given moment

-he lures her into a false sense of security, gives her time to start thinking/believing that the only thing he changed was the alien DNA. he lets her get comfortable, being back with her team and especially being back with ava

-he does it in a moment where everyone would least expect it, in a moment where they're all together, hanging out, and all their guards are down for the time being (because. y'know. Of Course he would choose a moment like that)

-it's like,,, they're all having a family dinner or like,,, having a team movie night or smth. one moment sara is laughing and smiling with her team, thinking about how much she loves this and how there's nowhere else she'd rather be, and then the next minute the switch has flipped and she's been turned against her team, and suddenly she's attacking everyone with like,,, full force, not holding back bc why would she if her brain's been turned against them (think like,,, okay so i'm pretty sure it was divergent that i remember this from: without like,, getting into the specifics of divergent, basically sara's brain, i guess, would be altered so that instead of seeing the legends as friends they become the enemies. i mean like,,, obviously,, but i mean like,, okay idk where i'm going with this whole divergent thing but-)

-so anyway, she starts pretty much full-on attacking them out of seemingly nowhere, and no one knows what the hell is going on, but they know this is Definitely Not sara (like,, okay the Know it's Sara but they know it's not necessarily like,,, her,,, in control)

-the more,,, observant,,, legends noticed a split-second before she started attacking that something in her changed, first by the look in her eyes, and then immediately after how she went from laughing and smiling with the rest of the team to just,,, like,, nothing at all, and a second after that is when she started attacking

-now like,,, anyone on the ship who was there during the whole death totem thing would know like,,, sara when she's not in her own head and not in control of her body,,, is Very dangerous and could be very lethal if they're not careful, so,,, they mostly take an,,, avoid and tactical retreat type of strategy rather than like,,, offensive/defensive type thing (because they know how that turned out last time and they know that they'd most likely lose)

-none of them really know what to do because none of them are really sure if this is something that can be fixed, they don't know if there's any way that they can get sara back to normal,,, and that Hurts them, because they all love her and they really don't wanna think about what would happen if this couldnt be reversed (and also like,,, the fact that they would have just somewhat-recently gotten her back from outer space it's just like,,, it's a lot)

-eventually (and it was,,, Not easy) they get her to the brig or w/e it's called now (i think ava's called it a dais?? idk lmao) and they get her inside and like,,, trap her in there until they can figure out how to get her back. they probably also maybe like,,, take extra precautions and like,,, chain her up or smth (bc like,,, they'd still have to let the barrier down to give her food n stuff so,,,)

-since she's chained up n can't exactly do much, ava decides to go in there one day, "just to see, because we've tried everything we can think of so far and there has to be a way to get her back, there Has to be, and she's strong, alright, and maybe if she just,,, Feels me, maybe she'll come back to us. i have to Try"

-so she does. she lets down the barrier, steps inside, puts it back up. the rest of the legends are in the room for back up (just in case), and they watch as ava steps up to sara, who's struggling against the chains, trying to break free. ava puts a hand against sara's chest, right over her heart, and then leans her forehead against sara's, and she talks softly to her, saying whatever she can think of that might get sara to come back, to Remember

-sara struggles against her at first because she's still brainwashed, but sara is nothing if not strong and stubborn and persistent, so of course she ends up fighting through and remembering who she is and who the legends are

-she's confused for only a moment before she remembers and looks around at her team, and then she loathes herself with every fiber of her being, and she kinda just,,, loses all the fight that she has in her for that moment and just kinda,,, falls so that the chains are the only thing holding her up

-ava undoes the chains and then pulls sara into her arms so she doesn't fall completely. sara tries to push her away because she doesn't think she deserves this and also she's Terrified that she'll end up hurting ava anyway, even though she's back to herself. ava just holds her tighter though and they kinda both slowly sink to the ground

-the rest of the legends let the barrier down and kinda like,,, step closer to her

-normally sara would Hate anyone but ava seeing her this vulnerable but this isn't really a "normal" situation and also she's like,,, a little too wrapped up in self-hatred to be able to make sense of much, so the rest of the team kinda just like,,, piles in n surrounds her in a group hug to like,,, try to get through to her and show her that they all still love her

-it kinda works for a little bit and sara just like,,, lets herself sit there and break down surrounded by her team, but as soon as the night comes and she's laying in bed with ava all the self-loathing comes back again full force. at some point she manages to fall asleep, but not for that long bc she wakes up from a nightmare soon after

-she kinda just,,, shuts herself down for a while and like,,, isolates herself/pushes everyone away as much as she can

-the legends know it's a lot for her to deal with and they can't imagine the guilt and self-hatred she must be feeling (bc they know sara is Like That) but they still like,,, wish that they could get her to see that itll be okay

-it gets so bad one night that none of them get any sleep because they're all really worried about sara (and also because sara is in the gym, working herself out to the point of exhaustion and collapse and,, well,, she's not being very quiet about it)

-so they all end up in the gym with her that night, watching her break Another punching bag. and because nothing seems to be working, she grabs one of her throwing knives and throws it back into the wall farthest from her (nowhere near where the legends are standing) and then she kinda just,,, sits down,,, doesn't do anything else or say anything else, just sits down n puts her head in her hands n her shoulders start shaking

-one by one the legends all go n sit down with her and they get into as much of a group hug as they possibly can. its then that they finally get through to sara, even just a little bit, and nothing's really like,,, okay,,, because sara's still very much Not Okay about the whole thing but like,,, they all have a feeling that like,,, maybe,,, maybe itll start to get better from there on out

#avalance #sara lance #ava sharpe #okay so these are like #not necessarily the Best headcanons ive ever written #but they're def angsty so #and also its like 130AM for me rn and im tired lmao #oh and also-#i could so talk about the complete lack of ethics and moral of what bishop did to sara #like for Ages #oh and also could do the same for the Very Questionable ethics and morality of the lazarus pit so like #maybe ill make a post about that idk #anyways #legends of tomorrow #headcanons #headcanon prompts

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thompsborn · 3 years

Note

do you have any spare ironhusbands or sambucky headcanons?

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY

oh my god okay i’ve been so fucking wrapped up in both ironhusbands and sambucky and absolutely nothing else for WEEKS because of tfatws (obviously if you have seen my endless spam of reblogs but can you BLAME ME) and the portal closed has ironhusbands so i’ve been just. oh my god i am happily drowning in this and them and i do not need nor want air. ok.

also these are all hc’s based just in canon not au, and lol warning this got so long help me, though my brain is so scrambled from tfatws finale that all sambucky thoughts are scrambled and jumbled so i wasn't able to coordinate them as well as ironhusbands so the ironhusbands section is definitely longer pfighf i'm so sorry i'm like this

ironhusbands:

when they met at mit tony didnt know shit. like. like nothing. he didnt know a single god damn thing about anything. like he was a genius he could solve any equation given to him and baffled professors when he was handed like two supposedly impossible equations to this fuckin fourteen year old and he just looked at them with like a mcdonalds burger or some shit hanging out of his mouth and just answered them no problem, but he was still such a hopeless idiot, and rhodey, also a genius attending as a sixteen year old, had to teach him the basics of life, like. making toast. tony how do NOT know how to make toast. its TOAST. you put it in the TOASTER. have you NEVER SEEN A—OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FUCKING CATCH IT ON FIRE—

he does not perfect the clearly impossible task of making toast until he is 17 and rhodey buys him a cake to celebrate the momentous occasion even though tony went though 528 toasters

you are gold by the national parks. thats it. thats all i have to say. listen to the song and look up the lyrics. you’ll get it.

and also paper planes by jon bellion but specifically for after rhodey tells tony he’s gonna join the air force and tony is worried but doesnt know how to show it and they have like a chill night in and all tony can think about is how stupid he is and how he’s such a coward because he cant get himself to tell rhodey that hi!! i love u!! and im scared to lose u and that you’ll get hurt and maybe die or smth!!

when rhodey finds out about how tony was raised (going with mcu, where tony wasnt physically abused but more emotionally neglected and ignored by howard and always talked down to and compared to others and wasnt treated like he was worthy and never was told he was loved and everything like that) he gets PISSED. like he is MONUMENTALLY angry. and it takes YEARS for him to find out about this too. and it actually puts a bit of a strain on their friendship for awhile when they meet too

like rhodey knows about the starks obviously and he assumes tony is going to be this obnoxious arrogant rich boy asshole and is so not looking forward to being roommates but he was raised to have an open mind and give everyone a chance, but tony was raised to be wary of everyone and keep his walls up and his emotions in shackles because whatever he shows can be used against him, so they clash, you know? they dont fight or anything but theres tension bc it isnt right and they dont get each other.

rhodey tries to be nice and tony doesnt understand nice because his only example of nice is jarvis and his mom and even then his mom and jarvis are always off with his dad so he barely sees them so its still rare for him to experience the nice of them so he doesnt know how to be around someone nice all the time, and so he gets defensive and thinks about how howard drilled it into him to be wary and he thinks maybe rhodey isnt ACTUALLY nice but someone PRETENDING to be

and rhodey starts to feel justified in assuming the worst about tony stark because tony is all cold and distant and rude and is about to stop the keeping an open mind thing about a month into their first year but then he comes back to their dorm early from class one day and tony doesnt come in so rhodey is just standing there and watches for a minute as tony sits there staring down at his twenty sixth attempt at a letter he wants to send his mom becauss he knows his mom likes letters even though he could just call but they havent really called him (howards fault but he’s fourteen still and its hard to rationalize that howards busy life and controlling thumb extends past his son) and rhodey is just confused because tony just suddenly sighs and sniffles a bit and murmurs “this is so stupid” and crumbles up the paper and throws it in the garbage and rhodey cant help but peer into it and barely sees the words hey mom scribbled at the top and that. that. hm. okay.

so rhodey keeps trying because he wasnt supposed to see that but he did and now he kind of has a feeling that maybe tony isnt all that cold and distant and rude as he seems, maybe he just doesnt really know how to be any different, so he thinks about all the subtle little ways that his family has shown him they care about him and starts to invite tony to go get food or to study together even though neither of them really need to study or to help each other with assignments or just anything thats mundane enough to not raise suspicion but still starts to open the door and make tony relax around him just that little bit and then before tony realizes it the end of their first year is there and theyre like friends or something and it hits him that he’s gonna miss rhodey.

for the first time ever there’s someone other than his mom and jarvis that he’s actually going to miss.

rhodey grins at him and says that they’ll be roommates again next year because they have to be and that the summer will be over before they know it and the sentiment is nice but tony spends the summer alone wandering around a house too big and empty after being in a dorm that’s small and has a friend.

but rhodey doesn’t know this. like he knows that tony isn’t the kind of guy he originally assumed but he doesn’t know that he’s literally ignored and neglected and like emotionally and sometimes verbally abused so he’s kind of surprised when the next year begins and they DO end up being roommates again (because tony kind of asked his mom, on a rare day when he got to see her and howard wasnt around, to get mit to make sure they could be) and tony just HUGS him like its been years and they’ve known each other forever but he goes with it and hugs him back because maybe tony’s just more affectionate once he gets to know someone and rhodey is okay w that.

they get closer as the years go by and they graduate from mit together and they’re BEST friends and at the end of the year rhodey invites tony to spend new years eve w his family but tony cant bc howard is having some kind of gala starting at 5 because hes weird and dumb and tony hates it and he also isnt given the option of not going even though he doesnt want to but the entire way there howard drills into him about not fucking up and berates him for all the times he has in the past and when they get there tony is already just not feeling it so he’s like nope!! no!! i simply cannot!!

so he goes in and finds an exit thats in the back and he leaves and finds a fucking payphone of all things and he has rhodeys home number memorized for years now and he calls and someone he doesnt knoe answers and theres music in the background and voices and tony’s entire stomach is in his throat and his heart is sunken into his twisted gut because he just wanted one night where maybe he could smile next to his parents and feel like he fit with them but he couldnt have that and he asks to talk to rhodey and then he is and asks if its too late to accept his invite and rhodey is like yeah of course do u need my address bc its still only 5 pm and its a 2 hour drive between south philadelphia and manhattan so he’d make it with plenty of time before it got to midnight so yay

and tony is like. oh. hm. i dont know how to drive actually. that was a thing that no one ever thought to teach me even though i asked about it about ten million times. and rhodey is used to tony not knowing how to do things that most people their age can (see: the toast) and plus its not uncommon for people from new york to not drive anyway so he doesnt think anything of it and instead asks for tony’s address to come pick him up instead and they’d still make it back by like 9-9:30 so that would work too

and thats when tony is like. well.

about that.

he might be calling from a payphone.

on a random street corner.

and its kind of raining. and he’s cold. and he’s a bit dulled out from everything so he doesn’t really think about the fact that admitting this is going to lead to having to explain what happened and also why and that is happens often. but that doesnt matter because he kind of just wants to be with his best friend and not back at that gala with his dad right now.

rhodey is like,,, ok. ok. wheres a coffee shop nearby u can wait in. and tony thankfully is by a 24 hour one and tells him the name and the street corner its closest to and rhodey is like i’ll be there asap and tony goes and he waits.

a two hour drive turns into an hour and a half because rhodey is Worried™

but when he walks in tony goes from being all dulled out to being all HOLY SHIT because rhodey has a SPLIT LIP and he’s like WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHAT THE FUCK WHAT

and rhodey’s like no no its good my uncle was having fun and trying to wrestle with me and he accidentally elbowed me its all good man dont worry about it

tony isnt used to accidentally being hurt tho so he’s still like hmmm but he takes rhodeys word on it and they head out and tony wont say what happened or why he was calling from a payphone ?? which btw tony literally only was able to do bc there happened to be dropped change on the ground because boy would not have change on him ok, but rhodeys like alright lets go with this for now

so they gets to the rhodes house and it is in full swing with family and extended family and adopted family bc they are 100% the family that just adopts the neighborhood kids and the people who have no one else and like ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends even after the relationship ends bc they still are family despite not dating whoever it was they had been dating in order to be introduced to them so its a LOT of people and tony is like. this is semi familiar in terms a lot of people but this is NOTHING like what he has ever seen before holy fucking SHIT

rhodey is just like oh u have a small family then? so ur used to smaller gatherings?

and tonys like wtf are gatherings

and rhodey is starting to get a feel for what might be wrong but just takes tony inside to get him changed because he’s not spending new years eve at the rhodes house in a fucking expensive suit ok

tony is completely out of his element and like he’s not the only white guy there bc again the rhodes adopt people and those people are of every race and nationally you can imagine but he just isnt used to the vibe there are people laughing and sitting close together and playing games and theres music playing but not like classy music its music people can dance to and are dancing to and the food isnt the food he’s used to at galas and shit and nothing is what he’s used to and he just sticks to rhodey’s side like a fucking lost puppy and tries his best not to look like an idiot when rhodey introduces him to people and a lot of them know who he is but dont judge him or assume shit about him bc obviously if he’s friends w rhodey then he’s a good guy and they want to know him and thats enough

but tony is v overwhelmed bc what the FUCK IS HAPPENING this is nothing like anything he has ever experienced EVER

so eventually rhodey can tell he’s getting overwhelmed and takes him inside and lets him have a breather and then asks him about whats going in and thats when rhodey learns about what tonys life at home is really like and. anger.

SO MUCH anger

because not only has every single assumption he has ever made about tony been proven wrong, but now he knows that the best person he knows has never been treated the way he deserves and has never known a true home and comfort and love and safety and

and he’s gonna fix it

and this is the first step

so he takes tony back out and they’re still just friends but this is the day they both quietly realize they might kind of definitely like each other as more because tony is still so confused by the fact that what he knows isnt the normal and overwhelmed by how much there is and how different it is but rhodey holds his hand as a grounding point and whenever it might be too much they move off to the side where they arent completely gone but its less hectic and a bit more quiet and its just nice

tony goes to rhodeys house for every holiday despite whatever howard says

rhodey decks howard the only time they ever meet before tonys parents die and he has the most shit eating grin on his face afterwards that tony cant help but lose his shit laughing his ass off

anyway i didnt mean to ramble for so long about that specific idea so i’ll end the ironhusbands ramble with this one last thought, which is as follows:

rhodey gets hurt in the air force at some point, and it isnt that bad tbh but he does have to go the hospital and shit and gets stitches or whatever idk i dont know what specifically happens i just think it’d be just bad enough that it takes him a few weeks to be able to go back to work but he’s not like OH GOD HURT yk?

but like stated above tony was scared and worried when rhodey told him he was gonna go into the air force so he hears about this and they’re probably like almost 30 at this point because they’re dumb and it takes them forever to get their heads out of their asses (i say this even though in the portal closed it takes them even longer but i digress) rhodey has like his mon his sister his niece visiting him and they were worried but they know hes fine so theyre just talking and in a good mood and then—

door slams open. tony stark enter stage left. disheveled suit, fresh from a meeting he definitely was not supposed to leave, having flown in from maibu the second he heard and then had happy drive him and then got impatient because of traffic and ended up sprinting like ten blocks while happy was like what the FUCK

of course rhodeys family are well aware that these idiots are desperately in love with each other so they’re just like lol ok and just leave the room while tony starts fretting over him like he’s about to die himself if he doesnt know if rhodey is okay and rhodey is like tony tony dude tones stop tony im okay tony stop it

until finally tony just fucking breaks down like full on tears in his eyes voice cracking hands clasped as he leans against rhodeys bed and tells him that he was so scared and he is so scared all the time whenever rhodey is out there because all he can think about is losing him and him getting hurt or dying and it’s maddening and this is when they get their heads out of their asses and kiss for the first time

(irony at its finest bc later when they are married and tony becomes iron man rhodey refuses to not have a suit of his own because if tony is going out there in a metal flying tin can then he isn’t going alone and wow what a power couple)

sambucky:

firstly i’m going to go post tfatws, but i’ll make a bullet point before going into it so if you wanna read up until that point you can but most of this will be random little headcanons based post tfatws

also it isnt like a whole plotline thing like the ironhusbands ones ended up being these ones are more random and kinda all over the place but loosely connected

update from after writing this: i lied

let me start by saying my interpretation of why they are the way they are in civil war is because of steve

thats not saying steve is the bad guy i mean to say that they’re jealous of each other because they thought that THEY were steve’s best friend who the fuck is THIS guy i dont want him here go away

children. they are children.

which i find very funny to imagine from sams pov because he literally is a licensed therapist and would 100% recognize why he’s acting how he is but he’s petty enough to do it anyway

and also he literally was helping steve track bucky down but i like to imagine that sam didnt think they’d ever really find him again and it’d just make him and steve like super mega best friends or something because hes a CHILD

and then from bucky’s pov steve goes through all this trouble to find him and protect him and then this random guy is acting like steve’s best friend and gets to sit in the front seat ??? bullshit. absolutely bullshit. worst thing ever. so stupid.

its so funny to me okay its SO funny

its like that schoolyard thing where your friend makes another friend and you hate it so much that you do something stupid like color on their drawing or put gum in their hair or whatever but they’re adults with 1. super soldier serum or 2. a superhero reputation/avengers status and suit with wings. so thats a thing.

post civil war i dont think they get much yk. because bucky is out in cryo and team cap is on the run and i doubt theyre able to return to wakanda much, if at all, and then it’s infinity war and then it’s endgame and after endgame there’s the aftermath and the aftermath is a mess

i like to think they have some moments before tfatws though. not many but enough for that slight foundation thats we can kind of see in episode 2 yk.

okay NOW it gets into post tfatws so!!

SO post tfatws everything is different because now they not only have spent all this time together, but they understand each other in a way that they didn’t before. in a way no one ever has. not even steve, who may have known them before, but he isn’t here anymore and he wouldn’t understand who they are now vs who they were before and it’s different.

bucky finds comfort in sam’s home town. sam finds comfort in watching bucky find a home there and he doesnt know why.

also sam treats redwing like a puppy and lets him fly around on his own and gets pet and stuff and bucky acts annoyed but the longer it happens you can tell he’s like “oh my god why is this thing endearing”

bucky has nightmares and sam knows this but bucky doesnt know that sam also has nightmares until one night when they’re still in sams home town and they’re staying on the boat because sams nephews are having a sleepover with some friends and they didnt want to get in the way or smth idk i just want an excuse for them to be on the boat and somewhat secluded from people but bucky already woke up from his nightmare and is out on the deck to get some fresh out and then oop

sam havin a nightmare too

because fucking of COURSE sam has nightmares he has been through some shit too!! not being able to catch riley and everything that happened since meeting steve and thanos and he turned to dust alone in the bushes ok like yes everyone that died were traumatized undoubtedly (peter my baby boy baby im so sorry that you got the worst of it) but bucky was around people but sam was laying on the ground and probably just watched his hands as he disappeared and he was alone and like. jesus christ ok.

and then steve trusted him with every weight and everything that comes with the shield not knowing how much more the shield has when he gave it to a black man and just like he has nightmares everyone in marvel does its a fact

but bucky finds out like this and he is shocked even though he realizes he probably should have been able to guess that this is a thing and he knows so much more about sam now than he ever did but this is how he learns more. he learns about riley. he learns so much.

sometimes bucky has those like “oh shit” moments where he’s like “maybe i was kind of a dick to someone who didnt deserve it” and he already had one of those with sam about the shield but he has another one because he assumed shit about sam when they were being all childish and jealous about someone else being friends with steve but like fuck

steve and sam probably got it

the not catching someone. the way it felt to try and to reach out and to miss and to have to choice but to watch as they fell.

what’s different is that steve got bucky back. he got to have that relief, eventually, even if there was the pain of knowing bucky had been taken by hydra, but at least he knew bucky had made it.

sam didn’t have that. riley didnt make it.

therefore, bucky has his “oh shit”

and bucky was already going soft around the edges with sam (as clearly seen in the last two episodes of tfatws, ESPECIALLY the finale because like did tou SEEZ ALL THE HEART EYES oh my GOD) but it’s this that really makes something in him melt and he just. he loses the last remnants of whatever tension or resentment or whatever negative feeling he may have been clutching onto.

there wasnt much left. but now theres none. now its all washed away.

its gone, and he gets it.

sam is a licensed therapist and he knew the reason he was being all dumb and childish and jealous with bucky was because steve had another best friend but also because steve’s other best friend was the guy that had been a big factor in how him and steve understood each other and how they bonded and it

it had kind of felt like they lost part of that when they found bucky again in civil war and he kind of wanted to blame bucky for it even though he didnt actually blame him at all so all it translated to was that dumb kind of jealous thing instead

but now it’s just them. its sam and bucky and it isnt steve and it isnt about steve and it shouldnt be because its about them. its about the boat and the water and the way they sit and watch the waves while the silence settles over them and the way that bucky says, “im sorry.”

its the way sam says, “me too.”

and bucky says, “you dont have to be.”

its the way they stay there until sarah comes to get them for breakfast and sams nephews convince them to play with them and their friends and the world is still shit and there is so much to do but

but its this and its them and that can wait

it can wait

they can take their time if they want to

maybe they’ve earned that much, at least

(it isn't a fast development because they're a complicated pair and there's so much to the two of them that need to figured out individually before they can even realize how well they work together, but the steps are so much easier knowing that they have the other in their corner and bucky knows that sam's home town is a place he's welcome to go and sam helps him make his own dreary little apartment into something that feels real and tangible with a bed and a couch and when they've become something that resembles stable and they've found a balance and they're okay, that's when they realize that maybe they can try for the more that sometimes bubbles under their skin and that they started to think about the more they spend time together. the warmth that sam feels every time he sees bucky playing games with his nephew and the smile that bucky has to fight to hide and still can't fully suppress when sam stands tall and proud with the shield in its rightful place, and it takes time, it takes work, it takes carefully placed bricks to build the foundation they need, but they get there, and when they do...

when they do, they're already happy, and it just makes them happier, and that's what makes it so much better.

that's what makes it worth the wait.)

#ironhusbands #sambucky #headcanons #asks

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silenthillmutual · 3 years

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Would u ever analyse/write about peter bipolar stuff bc i see so many ppl psychoanalyse daniil but i just want to put the stamatins in a lab and examine them anyway i saw ur peter daniil bingo thing and i think manic depressive peter is so real and we should spread the word and there isnt enough peter content maybe daniil can b there too so yh what do u think about petrs brain ??...... umm im a little weird from many painkillers but i hope this makes sense

bipolar peter ask part 2 -- but also i think p1 petr is so different from p2 peter kind of a bigger different than most other characters [[like peter1 is still consumed by his vision and a pretty wizard and insane utopian but p2 peter is more tired disillusioned ready to be a dilf]]] so like man they might need to be separated if analysed but anyway hes got problems ❤️

soooo i am trying to answer this for the second time. tumblr’s new ask formatting kind of fucked up when i tried to insert the few screenshots i thought explained peter’s mental state. so here’s peter thoughts... 2!

i don’t really have the screenshots required to make a lengthy meta post about peter’s mental health issues on the scale of my daniil & autism analysis - though i doubt any analysis i write will quite surpass that - and even less for classic peter, but i do have a few thoughts.

i think a lot about peter’s state of mind because he’s probably my favorite utopian. which isn’t to say that i dislike the others (except georgiy), but peter holds a special place in my heart because i really relate to that depression he’s got going on. i like to think of peter as bipolar type ii, because the depression seems more pronounced. i also think it’s a good balance with andrey, who i hc as having bipolar type i. in contrast to peter’s depression, andrey has the irritability and impulsivity of a manic episode (i mean, he’s walking around without a shirt while there’s a sentient plague outside. shout out to everyone who’s walked around in the freezing cold in tank tops and shorts because they were (hypo)manic)

Peter: We don’t see eye to eye, the Judge and I. He argued taht the Tower was never their family’s crowning achievement... merely mine. And I concur. It was my crown. I’ve hit the ceiling...

i know the tower’s creation and existence is the source of much speculation and i’ve seen and liked a lot of what i read that people have had to say about it, the role it plays in the story, and the role it plays in peter’s depression. but i think it’s also fair to read it as something he may have created and feels he can’t replicate because he was hypo/manic at the time and has since crashed. once while hypomanic i was writing 5k a day like it was nothing, and when i finished the project and the episode i became overwhelmed with grief, like i would never write again. i think this hypothesis is supported by the fact that he and andrey obviously have created many fantastic things - they reference the dancing bridge and i think the other two are the cold hall and the house house? it’s late so lol if i got the names wrong - so clearly those unfinished stairways are not all there is. and he’s inspired again when he temporarily has custody of grace, so clearly he can and will create again, with or without the polyhedron.

Peter: You know, old boy, I was never persecuted for my genius. Nor was I prosecuted for murder. And yet, it turns out all this was my hell after all.

Voice line: Life is a night at the bar. All the wisdom you gain, you pay for in pain.

i think one of my friends w bipolar suggested that the way he interacts with his creations hints at psychosis, but that's something i'd be ill-equipped to discuss as i don't experience psychosis. his paranoia that farkhad and andrey are mad at him, though...

Peter: I wonder how long my tower will hold. I wonder if Farkhad forgave me... if Brother is angry with me... I wonder about many things.

this screenshot isn’t exactly proof of anything, but he definitely seems wrapped up in mistakes that he’s made in the past in a way that feels familiar. at some point in time all the mental illnesses become inextricable, but there’s a lot i’ve felt i’ve lost to the bizarre shit i’ve done while strugging w bipolar disorder and i think the regret is real. not to mention the significant comorbidity of bipolar disorder and anxiety disorders. and the high rate (70%, according to this) of comorbidity between bipolar disorder and substance use disorder

Peter: A lot. I have to quit drinking, but I don’t have any willpower left.

peter clearly has a lot less faith in his potential for recovery and it makes me wonder if he’s tried to get sober before and failed.

also i tend to mash my characterizations together when writing fic because i look at the two games as accompaniments of each other - especially as we only have one route of p2 so far. but i do think p2 peter seems slower and sadder than classic peter. i think they’re different symptoms of the same illness though... maybe when i get around to replaying bachelor route i’ll take more screenshots of peter and formulate more thoughts on his mental illness but boy. he’s got it.

thank u for the ask!! i love talking n thinking about this kinda stuff.

#icarus.txt #peter stamatin #bipolar headcanons #one of these days i will write a fic that's just peter

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discoclubofvenus · 4 years

Text

Kissing headcanons w/Hinawa, Victor, & Maki

Warnings: nothing short of a little cussing

Genre: Fluff

Gender: Neutral

A/N: I may or may not have enjoyed writing these a bit TOO much! Nonetheless I hope you enjoy these headcanons!

╒══════════════╕

TAKEHISA HINAWA:

╘══════════════╛

Hinawa is the type to have those kisses that leave your mind blank, heart fluttering, and lungs breathless

Each time he kisses you, he’ll wrap his arms around your whole body and hold you so close to his body that you’ll be able to feel his heartbeat (or at least that’s the sentiment behind him holding you so tightly) then he goes in for the kill

He also knows that his kisses will leave you weak in the knees so that’s why he holds you like that lol

What makes these kisses so effective in ko’ing you in (1) move is the fact that he chooses the times you’d least expect these types of kisses!

It could be when he’s going to separate from you before going to fight fires (which he kisses you like it’s the last time he’ll see your beautiful face)

It could be whenever you’re fresh out of the shower, or right before training

Or when you’re in the middle of rambling about your day

Like I know this man keeps his lips moisturized so expect to taste a little mint on his lips

This lowkey surprised you whenever you had first kissed him (you expected them to be a lil chapped lol)

You had known Hinawa for years of working in the military and specialized force together. From co-workers to comrades to ending up as lovers (although he did reject you a few times). It was all worth the hurt and pinning as you had finally gotten together with Hinawa (once he mustered the courage to finally ask you out after rejecting you). To say you were shocked that day was an understatement but we’ll save that story for another time. Now, you were happy to be with the man but….you guys had yet to kiss and you guys were 4 months deep in the relationship (granted you still kept to your duties).

This was something you were determined to change, so while you guys were cooking for the brigade you decided to lean over and give his cheek a little smooch. Ya know, as a job well done! However, Hinawa turned to talk to you and was met with your lips (homebody was pleasantly surprised). He pulled away after like 10 seconds tho lol

He hit you with a “This is inappropriate workplace behavior.” and walked away, but then came back and gave you a kiss on the corner of your lips (what a bastard)

He won’t be up for smooches in the workplace unless you’re either about to separate for the night or he’s completed a day’s work early (But everyone has to be asleep or away from the station!)

You could probably sneak a kiss in while you guys are cooking for the rest of the brigade

Or anytime you guys are alone, although he will tease you by acting oblivious to your advances (inappropriate behavior headass)

KISS THE BACK OF HIS SHOULDER AND HIS EARS AND HIS FOREHEAD

Just to show that every part of him is appreciated and that you’re behind him every step of the way

Did I mention that even his pecks will leave your heart flipping as if it’s competing for Gold in the gymnastics Olympics? No? Well you’re gonna hear about it

He pecks to show you a little appreciation

Think of his pecks like little hearts!

If you’re ticklish, his pecks will definitely have you giggling a little

His kisses are smooth like whiskey in a way that he goes straight for the kill and you can still feel his lips on yours a while after kissing him

It would be up to you if it’s a delicate little kiss or a rough passionate makeout session

His favorite place to kiss you is the corner of your lips, your collarbone, and the palm of your hands, (you cannot tell me otherwise!)

╒═══════════╕

VICTOR LICHT

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SOMEBODY GET THIS MAN SOME VASELINE BC HIS SHIT IS C H A P P E D

He’s a mad scientist who only takes care of his BASIC hygiene

The type to always playfully back away whenever you try to kiss him then when you get annoyed he’ll give you smooches

“What?? Is that all you wanted (n/n)? All you had to was say so! Now look at you, all mad with no kisses”

Take away his kisses since he got a slick ass mouth

He’ll literally tail you with a list of excuses as to why he needs your kisses to get a proper hypothesis done and conduct thorough research and then he needs them as motivation to go test his theories

Like aight, damn here are your kisses you big goof

I’m not saying you should run your hands through his hair when you kiss him but that’s exactly what I’m saying

In fact, kiss his throat to let him know that he’s always welcome to speak his mind but then kiss his lips so you can shut him up

He’ll kiss your hands (as dramatically as possible), then he’ll pull you in...wrap an arm around your waist….and kiss you.

He’ll flick your forehead after kissing you as well

Another way he likes to kiss you is by keeping both hands in his pocket and leaning over to kiss you (mans be tall)

Or when you’re sitting in his lap as he rants about his research

This man loves some tongue action

Like you could give him a peck but he’ll whine about you ‘not kissing him right’ then pull you in for a makeout session

Occasionally you’ll feel him put his hand on your cheek….or the other cheeks

He’ll grab said cheeks too if the kiss gets heated

Like that’s y’all’s first kiss went lol

Observing Victor in his natural habitat of an organized mess filled with nothing but notes from his research always amused you. It was the only place you could see the brunette become so excited and display such passion towards his goal. You usually just examined him from afar, but today was different. Today he was actively discussing his research with you and the results he got from it. No longer were you in the background, this time you were at the forefront. Which incidentally was how you occupied his thoughts. It didn’t take too long (but it certainly took a while) for the both of you to connect the dots to a complicated puzzle that was related to his goal. “Do you know what this means (f/n)?” “I do, but I’m going to play dumb so I can listen to you explain it with that sexy brain of yours” and right after those words left your lips they were swallowed up by Victor’s lips. A kiss so fiery and intense had you wishing to be burned.

Victor will 100% kiss you after getting satisfactory results from either seeing his theories be correct or he finds new clues

He gets handsy with these kisses

AND HE DOESN’T CARE WHERE YOU GUYS ARE HE’S SMOOCHIN

You guys have kissed in the shower (y’all know he be thinkin HEAVY in the shower)

Depending on his mood you’ll get fiery kisses that make you think he is an ability user but for the most part, his kisses are pretty lazy

He adores lazy mornings where he can wake up to you kissing him all over his face (those feathery light kisses)

He’ll also tug on your bottom lip after a kiss and then complain about how he’s oh so hungry (take it as you will)

╒══════════╕

MAKI OZE

╘══════════╛

Flustered baby is flustered

Anytime you lean in to give her a smooch she gets so red (omg please call her your little strawberry)

Surprise kisses will fluster her to no end!!

She’s always so hesitant to kiss you because she doesn’t wanna mess it up

Nevertheless, her kisses are filled with nothing but adoration and love

Once she gets into the kiss is whenever she gets bolder

After you guys are finished kissing she’ll hide her face in your chest and let out the cutest little whine

This is completely different from when she gets huffy or full of passion

Expect these kisses after fighting a fire, when she’s finished training, after dinner with her family, when she gets jealous, when she gets the hang of controlling her little fire sprites..

She’ll even try to surprise kiss you! (She’ll still get shy riiiight before kissing you)

Did I mention she loves kissing you? Well, she does!

Her favorite places to smooch you are definitely your neck and cheeks (That way she can easily hide her face)

YOU ARE OBLIGATED TO KISS HER CHEEKS AND HER NOSE (I made the rules and you have to follow them, you’re on my blog!!)

She’s the type to kiss your fingertips during a moment of high intensity and she doesn’t know if you guys will make it out alive. Moreover, when she can’t properly convey all of her emotions so she kisses your fingertips while closing her eyes in a moment of serenity then she looks into your eyes with such intensity and--

Thankfully your first kiss together wasn’t during such a life-threatening moment but it was definitely after training the rugra--I mean Shinra and Authur

Walking through the fire station always calmed you down, however, your mind was all over the place with worry! You couldn’t seem to find Maki, despite texting and calling her phone. You knew she had to be at the fire station or else she would’ve been with you celebrating your 2 months anniversary! Hearing the sounds of your girlfriend shouting and the grunts of pain following after gave you your answer. Well--at least you were right in some aspects. Walking towards the noise, you were met with Maki standing over the two newbies. Seeing her in all her glory made your heart go into palpitations. Once Maki noticed you she started making her way to you with a loving glow in her eyes. “Oh! (F/N)! What are you doing here?” you didn’t even have it in you to answer her as you leaped into her arms. Giving a quick peck to her cheek then one on her lips you huffed in satisfaction at her expression “Happy 2 months silly!”

Safe to say you guys had a lovely day and she kept asking for kisses

Her lips always taste like some sort of fruit from her chapstick

She also likes kissing your cheek while you guys swing your hands back and forth

When baby is upset give her some forehead kisses (It’ll help her calm down)

She likes to have her kisses be short and sweet but sometimes she’ll let her lips ghost over yours after a makeout session (what a tease)

#fire force imagines #fire force imagine #fire force fanfiction #maki oze imagine #fire force hinawa #hinawa imagine #victor licht imagine #fire force victor #fire force x reader #fire force x you #Hinawa x reader #Viktor licht x reader #Maki oze x reader #Takehisa hinawa x reader

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blackdevilwhitedemon · 3 years

Text

Writing An Otome Isekai Thingy

Anyway, as the title states, I'm writing an otome isekai thingy! I didn't know where else to post this (besides r/otomeisakai), so here I am. I'm writing one for 3 reasons.

A- I’m very bored. :(

B- My brother rec me one of these things a few months ago; I've descended into the rabbit hole ever since.

C- Writer's block! I wanna write for my fanfics, but my brain said no. Maybe if I write OG content it can get my creative juices going and I can finally go back to working on updates.

Had a couple of ideas for a story and had my brother pick one by random.

The 'guy gets reincarnated as the yandere capture target' idea got picked.

My general idea is that a guy who’s an Otaku and reads/watches romance series as a guilty pleasure gets reincarnated into an otome. He actually played the otome he’s in bc his younger sister basically nagged him to bc she wanted someone to talk to about it.

He realizes though that he woke up as the baby version of Shamus Hendell, the yandere capture target of Yellow Rose of Amarea.

Yanderes don’t typically become yanderes through a loving family and a good life, so of course this character had a tragic anime backstory and goes through maybe hardships in his life before ending up in the academy where the game starts.

The MC realizes this and is freaking out, bc he doesn’t want to deal with the series of horrible events that the OG character went through.

I like series where the Protag kisses up others to survive bc even if they’re appealing to others, typically they are the ones who have others wrapped around their fingers. (And for some reason that’s assuming to me.)

So he kinda ends up doing that. He seeks out the other capture targets, and the heroine and villainess. Mostly to get them on his side. His thought process is, ‘if I can’t really protect myself, why not get ppl in higher places to do it for me?’

And it does work as he gets very chummy with the 2nd prince who’s the one that gets him out of the bad situation first. And bc he has the attention of the second prince, he’s able to meet some of them other characters.

There’s a few characters he won't meet until the academy arc, but most of the important characters he’ll meet around here.

For instance, there’s the commoner character who got into the school through scholarships or bc he has high/rare magic skills or whatever. He’s also one of the capture targets. The MC doesn’t want to find him bc he wants his guy on his side, but bc he knows this guy is actually batshit crazy. He wants to find him earlier to stop him from blah blah that the guy does in all his endings. But he cannot find him until then bc this dude is a commoner and the MC is still technically a part of high society. So it was basically impossible to find him.

This is going to be a big anxiety of the MC once he’s in a more comfortable position. Knowing that this guy in the future will try to do smth very drastic and dangerous, is still out there.

The MC will try to appeal to important characters by acting weak and soft, like, a crybaby a guess? He wants to seem like a little rabbit to others. And to his utter surprise, it fucking works. (He’s taking advantage of his softboi looks, as the character was designed to look feminine and non-threatening so fans during the hype wouldn’t be able to tell the character was going to be a yandere. And therefore making the fact like, a plot twist in the game as Shamus comes off as a quite n’ shy guy at first.)

He forms a bromance with the 2nd prince. After some stuff happens he befriends the villainess who ends up crushing on him. The villainess big bro who’s a siscon is chill w/ him since his sister likes him. But is very much in the mindset that if the MC hurts his sis in any way, he’s never gonna see the light of day. The heroine falls for him very quickly which is actually off-putting for him. (The joke is that she’s airheaded & kinda dumb. She just has a very cheerful personality by default. The reasoning is that that’s how marketing portrayed her and since she’s supposed to be a blank slate that’s just what her personality turned into.) The heroine 100% has her bangs covering her eyes.

The MC leaves a powerful impression on the short cute boy (who’s actually a meanie) and later in the academy arc has this weird anime admiration for him. You know what I’m talking about. The commoner, while harboring a hatred for the aristocrats and nobles, respects the MC to an extent later turning into a crush. (That of which will absolutely give the MC whiplash.)

Two characters who are mobs in the game become the MC’s normal friends when he feels like the personality of the main characters are too much. Maybe he has more mob friends idk yet, but two of the ones he adored as characters the most both end up having crushes on him. One girl, one boy.

5 ppl will like-like him. Perfectly balanced as all things should be.

He definitely takes advantage of this lmao. (In like, a protection squad way, not harem.)

Maybe I’ll even have two of the girls lose interest bc they realize they like each other,,,, Have a lilly aside romance,,,, You know bc,,,gurls pretty,,,,

My need for sapphic content aside, ultimately my goal is to have fun while writing this and confuse the heck hacky out of my readers on who the true love interest will be. >:)

I guess I’ll mostly be writing this with a wattpad audience in mind??? (But it’s mostly just for fun so who knows.)

Since AO3 is more oriented to fanfics, my Quotev is the physical manifestation of a dead goldfish in a bowl, and I don’t think this is smth the ppl on FictionPress would like to read about… So yeah, my Wattpad audience it is. I have no choice.

I’m still on the 1st ch as I keep revising my outline. I at least want a solid outline of the first arc before I post anything. Imma try and attempt constant updates but to do so I need to know wtf I’m doing. So all this jazz is subject to change.

And just to let you know how the tone of the story will be (for most of it, the 1st arc is definitely going to be more serious), the title for chapter 1 is ‘Sorry Truck-kun, You’ve Been Replaced’ since he died by choking on an apple instead of being hit by a truck.

#textpost #otome isekai #isekai #isekai novel #writing wip #my writing #story ideas

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infinitebells · 4 years

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so, angst. being moran's childhood bsf so when he becomes colonel you're like "you better come back or i'm dragging you back haha" and he teases you bc "aw you love me that much you'll actually go to war?" and he sees how upset you genuinely are and he's like "of course i'm coming back" but surprise u hear he's kia and you're a wreck so when he DOES come back you're a mess of tears and sputtering bc "you were dead!" cut to him holding u in his arms and telling u he loves u - ruby anon

i have stayed up thinking about this for two nights straight and every time i do i change it up a bit so hopefully my thoughts are more coherent on paper. also i lowkey made myself cry writing this

✧ he was literally your best friend, you were never apart from him for more than a day unless one of your families was traveling

✧ you’d known him since you were both kids, having lived next to each other your entire lives

✧ you two would always be seen running around the town and laughing

✧ he was so so protective of you, he got into fights with boys who would tease you or make fun of you

✧ the older you two got, the more it was painfully obvious that you were in love with each other

✧ through your teenage years he’d do anything to have alone time with you, sneaking into your room at midnight to stay up and talk with you, pulling you to a random meadow so you guys can have lunch, anything to be with you

✧ as you got older though, your parents were less inclined to let you two hang out since moran needed to focus on his education and you needed to learn how to be a ‘proper lady’

✧ hence the need to sneak into your room in the middle of the night to spend time with each other

✧ when he found out he had made colonel and he was being shipped off in two weeks, he was devastated that he had to leave you

✧ that night you could tell something was off with him, he was quieter than usual and couldn’t meet your gaze

✧ when you asked him what was wrong, he didn’t say anything at first, until he reached out and pulled you into his lap so that your legs jutted out over his left leg and the temple of your head was pressed to his chest

✧ he could barely get the words out, his voice so low he was scared you wouldn’t be able to hear, but the way your body stiffened slightly allowed him to realize you did

✧ he held his breath, waiting for you to say something until he felt you shift in his lap, turning so you could face him, legs straddling his waist before wrapping your arms around his waist and putting your head in the crook of his neck, congratulating him with a shaky voice for doing such a good job

✧ he holds you tighter against him, swallowing the lump in his throat

✧ he can feel you trembling in his arms, but he doesn’t say anything until you pull yourself out of his neck and give him a wobbly smile, tears in your eyes

✧ “you better come back or i’ll drag you back myself”

✧ he knows you’re just trying to be your usual sarcastic, witty self to try and push through the reality that the love of your life your best friend is leaving and may never come back

✧ he laughs, grabbing your face and keeping it gently in his hands

✧ “aw, you love me that much that you’ll actually go to war?”

✧ when he finishes talking, the tears in your eyes spill out involuntarily, and your head drops from his hands to try and hide your tears from him

✧ he realizes how upset you truly are, grabbing your face again and bringing your forehead to his, wiping your tears with the pads of his thumbs

✧ “i’m coming back princess, i promise”

✧ when you open your eyes and look up, you realize just how close your faces are

✧ your brain short circuits and every memory you’ve had with him flashes before your eyes, and you realize way too late that “oh fuck i’m so in love with him”

✧ meanwhile in his head, he’s thinking that even with tears in your eyes he’s never seen you look so beautiful

✧ so he brings your forehead to his lips, kissing it softly before pulling you back into him

✧ the next few nights he comes over, you barely talk

✧ he knows how upset you are, so he just keeps you in his lap, brushing his fingers through your hair and telling you random stories to keep your mind off of the fact that he’ll be gone soon

✧ the night before he has to leave, you’re both deathly quiet

✧ you’re on different opposite ends of your bed, staring at the floor

✧ after another few minutes of quiet, you crawl over to him, pushing yourself into his lap so that your legs are once again over his legs and your head is resting just above his heart

✧ he doesn’t hesitate holding you close, breathing in the smell of your hair

✧ you’re scared to ask him your next question, but you push through with a very shaky voice

✧ “can you please just hold me and stay the night?”

✧ he’s quiet, terrified that this could be the last time he gets to hold you

✧ “anything for my princess”

✧ you nod against him, pulling your blanket up over you two before he settles so he’s lower on your headboard, one arm secured around your waist and the other stroking your hair

✧ that night is the only time he allows himself to cry, tears hitting the top of your head

✧ he knows you’re crying, he can feel your body shaking, but he doesn’t say anything. there isn’t anything he can say to make this any better

✧ but when he hears a choked sob, he holds you even closer to him, his eyes scrunching up because when he hears your cries, when he can feel how badly you’re shaking, he never wants to leave you

✧ you’re full on sobbing now, hiccuping every so often as you hide your face in his chest, hands balled up in his shirt

✧ he runs his hands over your back, kissing the top of your head, trying to comfort you

✧ in a spur of the moment decision, he starts humming a tune that had always been one of your favorites, hoping it would help

✧ he feels your shaking start to stop, your cries quieting, the only noise coming from you now is just occasional sniffles

✧ when you finally fall asleep on him, your tear stained face peaceful once again, he stares for a few minutes committing to memory the scene of you sleeping on his chest, hands clutching tightly onto his shirt with his arms around you

✧ once he starts to see the sky lightening, he slowly maneuvers you off of him, staring down at you one last time before leaving his ring with an ‘m’ engraved on it on your nightstand, as well as a note

✧ “i’ll come back for you princess. our story isn’t over yet, i still have things i want to tell you ok?”

✧ when you wake up and see the note and ring, you don’t hesitate to slip the ring on, putting the note in a box of your most precious keepsakes

✧ the first week he is gone, you’re utterly silent

✧ your parents heard that moran was getting deployed, and they knew you were close, so they didn’t try to comfort you because they knew you’d be inconsolable

✧ after a few weeks, you start talking more, but they know you’ll be off unless he’s back home

✧ your friends can’t say anything to help, you just change the subject every time, refusing to hear anyone talk about it

✧ it isn’t until three years later, when you’re 26 years old and he would be 28, his parents ask for you to come to their house

✧ when you get there, his mom’s eyes are red and his father is solemn

✧ your heart drops at the sight, and when they finally spit out the fact that he was killed in action, you stop breathing

✧ everything is a haze, the way they hand you his jacket that he wanted to give to you, his pocket watch that he’d left for you, and a letter he’d written in case he died on the field

✧ you don’t remember how you got home, but when your parents see you with his jacket and the watch with the letter, they know something awful has happened

✧ no tears have left your eyes, but you can hear your mom crying against your dad as you robotically make your way to your room, dropping yourself on your bed

✧ with shaky hands, you open the letter he left

✧ “hey princess. if you’re reading this, that means i broke our promise, and i’m so sorry that i did. my only motivation to come back home was you, and i’m eternally sorry for the fact that i can’t come home and be with you. there was still so much i wanted to do, to say, but i suppose i can tell you here. i love you. not the way that family loves each other but the way that i’m so desperately in love with you that when i think about you my heart beats two times faster, my palms get sweaty, and i can’t help but smile. i wanted to make you mine when i came home, but that can’t happen anymore. i’d give anything to hold you in my arms the way i did before i left, you looked so beautiful in my arms. god i miss you so much. i gotta go princess, but please know i love you so much, even in death. p.s. please keep the jacket, pocket watch, and ring. don’t get sad when you look at them, just remember all the good memories we had okay?”

✧ that’s when the tears fall, and then they don’t stop

✧ you’re screaming, sobbing, and your parents can’t do anything to calm you down

✧ your dad runs to get a doctor because the only way you’ll calm down at this point is with a sedative

✧ your mom holds you but you can’t say or do anything except cry, and cry, and cry because your childhood friend, your best friend, the one you’ve been in love with for years is gone, and you never got to tell him

✧ once the doctor gives you the sedative, your dad goes to the moran household to give her condolences, and your mother stays by your side, wiping your sleeping face with a damp cloth

✧ when you wake up, you’re completely numb

✧ after reading his letter for the first time, you put it in your box along with the note he left you before he first left

✧ for the next few weeks, you don’t speak to anyone. you’re mute, only doing work around the house, saving up for your own place because you can’t bear the thought of being in your room without him

✧ after two months, you leave your parents house, getting your own apartment

✧ your parents are understanding of the fact that you need space to yourself to get away from everything

✧ they help you move, and once you’re finally in your apartment, all you can think of is how badly you wish he was here to live in it with you

✧ you collapse on the floor, crying silently for the first time since you found out that he had died

✧ you had been wearing his jacket because it was cold outside, so you pull it even tighter around you, feeling like your chest was caving in on you from the way your heart throbbed painfully

✧ you didn’t stop crying for an hour, and when you finally did, you grabbed his watch off the kitchen counter, walking out and going to the nearest bar because you needed to be inebriated

✧ by the time you sit down at the bar, you’re completely unaware of your surroundings

✧ you signal the bartender for a whiskey, wanting to indulge in his favorite drink for old times sake

✧ as you’re sipping your glass, without your knowledge, moran is in the corner, drinking his own whiskey

✧ he hasn’t stopped thinking about you ever since he had been pronounced killed in action, wondering what you were feeling

✧ you on the other hand are so caught up in your drink you don’t acknowledge the man who slides onto the barstool next to you

✧ he taps your shoulder, and you turn to see him smiling at you

✧ he introduces himself, and you only nod before turning back to your drink, already tired of the social interaction

✧ he slides closer, asking if you’re here alone, and you nod once again, not even bothering to look at him

✧ he continues to flirt with you, and you only give half hearted replies, getting tired of him already

✧ once you feel his hand come to rest on your thigh, you fly up and clock him in the jaw, sending him flying off the stool and onto the floor

✧ everyone in the bar, including moran, looks up at the commotion

✧ he’s frozen, watching you stand furiously over this man who’s cowering on the floor before you

✧ “i’m very obviously wearing another man’s jacket, i’ve got a ring on my finger, i’m barely responding to you and you still continue to flirt with me? my husband died in the war two months ago but before he left he still taught me how to fight so unless you want your ass beat, i suggest learning some fucking boundaries,”

✧ with that, you storm out of the bar, and moran in a trance follows you, kicking the guy on the floor on the way out

✧ you’re fuming, shaking in anger, so much so that you don’t realize that moran is following you, in awe of how much more beautiful you’ve gotten

✧ by the time you’ve reached your apartment, you’re still shaking, but this time you’ve got tears in your eyes

✧ when you hear a knock on the door, you wipe your eyes and open the door

✧ there stands colonel sebastian moran, and you can’t breathe

✧ he’s there, in a jacket matching yours, black pants, black boots with a brown top, and a gray button up underneath his jacket

✧ his hair is longer now, and he’s bulked out, much taller than you compared to before when he was only three quarters of a foot taller, but he’s here

✧ “so i’m your husband now? i’d love to have had an invitation to the wedding”

✧ he sounds more in awe that you’re here in front of him, but hearing his voice again makes everything crash down onto you, and you collapse on your knees sobbing

✧ he rushes down to your level, closing the door before catching you before you hit the ground, holding you impossibly close to his chest as he devolves into tears, his heart breaking at your heart wrenching sobs

✧ “you were dead! you were dead, you were gone, and, and-“

✧ “i’m here. i’m here and i’m not leaving i promise”

✧ you pull back from his chest to grab his face and smash your lips onto his, tears still streaming down both of your faces

✧ his arms envelop your waist, both of you kneeling on the ground with your lips on each other’s

✧ your kiss is desperate, needing to feel him against you to know he’s really there and not just a figment of your imagination

✧ he kisses you back with just as much fervor, his body pressed to yours because it’s been almost three years and he needs to feel you against him once again

✧ when you finally pull back, you aren’t crying out of overwhelming sadness and shock, you’re smiling with tears of joy in your eyes, foreheads resting against each other

✧ “i’m in love with you sebastian”

✧ “i’m in love with you too princess, but i was supposed to be the first one to say it”

✧ you laugh through your tears, holding him closer to you because he’s finally home in your arms

✧ he picks you up, wrapping your legs around his waist and carrying you to your bedroom before laying down against the headboard with you in his arms and on his lap

✧ he peppers kisses all over your face, holding your face in his hands once again

✧ he pulls back once again, looking you up and down

✧ “you look really beautiful in my jacket princess”

✧ “i’d look good out of it too”

✧ his eyes widen before he’s flashing you that smirk that always has you swooning

✧ he promises that he’ll get you out of everything you’re wearing another day, but for now he just wants to hold you again in his arms

✧ he pulls both of your jackets off, kicking his shoes off as you take your own off, before he’s pulling you back to him

✧ you fit perfectly in his arms once again, and when he has your head resting against his chest once again, with your blanket pulled up over you two, he has to hold back tears of happiness feeling you with him once again

✧ “how about tomorrow we start planning that wedding that i missed huh?”

✧ “i knew you’d bring that up”

✧ “well i was planning on marrying you once i came back, and i still intend to”

✧ “good, i wouldn’t want anything else”

#yuukoku no moriarty #moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty x reader #moriarty the patriot x reader #sebastian moran #bells responds #bells’s ruby anon

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headofhelios · 3 years

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Ok I am a single follower but I like hannibal tv but would enjoy ur movie thoughts I like some of the books too and have been meaning to get around to the movies 😳😳

OKAY I'M EDITING A READMORE ONTO THIS LOL I REALIZED THATS SOMETHING I CAN DO! so now my incredibly waaayyy too long answer abt my thoughts on 2002 will is under there. apologies bc this is less "movie thoughts" and more "2002 movie will thoughts" but well thats how the chips fell

GOD okay sooo for the record i am reading the red dragon book and am like 7 or 8 chapters in and full transparency im not like. enjoying it lol. the book pisses me off with its misogyny (all the women in it are either dead or it feels like you're supposed to think theyre Selfish Bitches or theyre just there for like. bizarre and uncomfortable sexual moments like the guys talking abt that woman in the elevator, or that one part of mrs. leeds diary which is like. i guess could be there to Show Her Humanity or whatever but 1. there are more ways to do that 2. the book doesnt seem particularly concerned with her humanity considering she's barely even given a first name and so far the novel hasnt seemed to disapprove of how will thinks of her as a possession of her husband) and its inconsistency with will's most important character trait or whatever (he's so intensely, extremely empathetic towards EVERYONE, even serial killers, which makes him really good at finding them! and he can never turn this off, to the point where every time he has a conversation with someone, he ends up mimicking the way they talk, even if he tries to stop! but also he never empathizes with the victims or HIS OWN FUCKING WIFE? HELLO? so it really feels less like "extremely strong empathy for everyone that he cant control" and more like "he can empathize with serial killers extremely well and also other people if we want to Make A Point in one scene instead of letting the point show through the whole book") BUT UHHH ANYWAY. MOVIE THOUGHTS. THE MOVIE THOUGHTS YOU ASKED FOR COMING RIGHT UP!

okay this is what i am worried will either 1. draw annoying tv will graham stans to my blog like flies or 2. end with me being hanged in the town square BUT. it must be said. i prefer 2002 red dragon will graham to tv will graham. and quite frankly? so far? i think 2002 red dragon will graham is better than book will graham. i cannot lie.

my reasoning: because 2002 will actually empathizes with more people than serial killers and his boss! y'know! like you'd assume someone with constant extreme empathy would! the difference between the first scene with molly in the book vs in the movie are SO striking to me now that i've read that part of the novel. in the novel he seems very... rough, i guess, and like he doesnt care about molly's worries. he doesnt seem to see things from her perspective, which especially feels like a kick to the gut because MOLLY! SEES! THINGS! FROM! HIS! PERSPECTIVE!!! she literally empathizes with him more than he does with her! what the fuck! MEANWHILE in the movie, he does seem to care about her. his assurances that he wont get too involved seem like assurances rather than him trying to get her off his back. he hugs her and tells her he loves her and i actually believe that yeah, he loves her, he knows she's worried about him, and he wants to comfort her and ease her worries. and the victims! AGAIN such a stark difference to me! in the book, will is like... uncomfortable empathizing w the red dragon, of course, but he doesnt seem to empathize with the victims all that much, ESPECIALLY not the women. he doesnt care about them. he sees them as possessions belonging to their husbands and its so fucking gross. despite already suspecting that the red dragon chooses families based on the women, he decides to waste time focusing on the husbands as a way of "asking permission to look at [their wives]." what the fuck? meanwhile in the film, he feels for the victims so much that he can barely even say that the kids were shot in bed! when he watches the tapes, he focuses on the women! because that's his fucking job!!! and we see him empathizing with them! wow!!

siiigh okay im gonna stop talking abt the book vs the movie now bc again im only like 8 chapters or so deep. but now we come to tv will vs. 2002 will, which is admittedly gonna be more subjective and part of that it bc i cant remember a whole lot of specifics from the show bc my memory is Very Bad. but anyway

let's get the shallow stuff out of the way. yes i prefer ed norton's face to hugh dancy's. call hugh dancy "gender" or whatever have your fun i support you and your right to call any blood covered man a gender but by god is that not even REMOTELY my experience. next shallow thing to get out of the way: ed norton's line delivery is like music to my FUCKING ears compared to hugh dancy's i am so sorry. like the jokes about will shaking like a damp chihuahua before taking 5 minutes to stutter out "he's killing them....... On Purpose, jack." are funny and all but christ i had SUCH a hard time watching the show bc of that im not lying. literally hearing 2002 will just say "he's not keeping them. he's eating them." nice and quick, matter of factly is better than well im actually gonna end that sentence there but you get the idea. like YESSS you little blonde bitch get to the point i love you!!!

OKAY NOW less shallow points but also less uhh idk man i just dont remember a lot of hannibal. but basically: after seeing how caring 2002 will is, i'm kind of... idk i'm just so over tv will and how abrasive and harsh he is in comparison. like i fell in LOVE with how vulnerable 2002 will is, how he feels like he cares deeply about the people around him (and honestly... idk i cant remember a moment in the hannibal tv series that made me feel the way i felt when 2002 will can't say "the kids were shot in their beds". it's like... yeah this is a guy who feels so deeply for everyone around him at all times. i believe that.) and i just dont remember getting that same feeling from tv will. i have been gently spoon fed the most excellent chocolate pudding and everything else in my memory is just a snack pack. i guess tv will has those moments (what comes to mind is when he brings gideon to hannibal's house and is crying and he says "please dont lie to me") but idk they just didnt really do for me what 2002 will does. and then their scenes with reba! wow! i rewatched the tv version after watching red dragon, bc the film version made me tear up, meanwhile the tv version i barely remembered and i wasnt sure if that was just bc of the different mindsets i was in while watching them or what. and ok i just rewatched the tv version again and like... yeah. it's the wills lol. i LOVEEE tv reba SO much she is giving everything in that scene!! she sounds so like... broken, both bc of dolarhyde's apparent suicide and bc of finding out who he was + what he was doing, she sounds so fragile and guilt ridden! she's amazing!! but will. idk. tv will's delivery just seems... idk this feels dumb to say but it sounds like writing. i admittedly LOVE the line "people who study this kind of thing say that he was trying to stop because you helped him." and his delivery there is good. but between tv "you didnt draw a freak, you drew a man w a freak on his back" and the 2002 version, the 2002 delivery seems more genuine while the tv delivery sounds rehearsed. idk overall the 2002 version of that conversation just makes me feel more? its like. idk i can feel the 2002 version gently holding my heart while the tv version is a scene that is nice in h/nnigram gifsets or w/e.

umm ok this is already suuuper long and my brain is getting a bit mushy so i'm gonna start wrapping it up lol. i'll probably compare book will and 2002 will again after i finish the book, and then i miiight rewatch hannibal, or at least parts of s3. but right now my thoughts are basically: book will is a fucking dick who has an easier time empathizing with serial killers than with his wife. tv will is a nothing girl after being so completely catered to + also idk he doesnt have the same fragility that i want from my wills now. and 2002 will is my little caramel apple. he has this delightful vulnerability and feels like he cares so much and empathizes with more people than serial killers and his boss and 4 people in a diner for one scene! 2002 will made me care about will graham! which is honestly kind of a feat!

#long post #like so so so long #my condolences anon and also anyone following me who doesnt want this on their dash #but yeah 2002 will is my booboo bear my cinnamon swirl coffeecake my little heavensent angel #and ed nortons performance made me feel more than hugh dancy's #i think ed norton does a really good job at giving his characters that kind of vulnerability and i LOVE that!!#like yeah whatever 'you're gat arent you dont you just think hes hot' sure say that but also like #have you seen him in primal fear? its a movie thats a firm Its Complicated for me but his performance is so good and he feels so vulnerable #and even in fight club and kingdom of heaven i think he gets that in there! idk i genuinely think he's a good actor #personal #red dragon #if im writing an essay i may as well put it in my tags #asks #anonymous #<- FORGOT TO ADD THOSE TAGS. anyway #EDIT: NOW FEATURING A READMORE LOL.

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phoebehalliwell · 4 years

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how would you rank the seasons from least to most favourite?

alright okay right off the bat worst season season 7. for starters i think this season has no staying power i mean like since i’ve been running this blog 4 so long now my knowledge of charmed is encyclopedic and insanely vast more than like it ever need be but for the longest time. i could not remember season 7. like wtf even happened there?? evidently leo became human??? cole returned? the avatars??? like all of it was just. it’s not even necessarily forgettable it’s just i straight up could not remember it for the longest time. and i’ve said it before the concept of utopia was way to advanced for a show like charmed to tackle i am not watching charmed for moral philosophy i am watching bc i love these girls ♥ hee hee hoo hoo magic adventure ✨ tho if i am to offer a single comment on utopia: it’s awfully rich for a show to go on about destiny and fate and then take a stand against utopia in the name of free will. but w/e. i don’t like leo in the avatars i don’t like his dynamic with piper in this season i don’t like whatever phoebe’s doing this season there’s like leslie?? maybe there’s someone else? boring & flavorless they should have been setting up her endgame instead of puttering around. and kyle. zoo wee mama. could have been a great antihero. morally gray. duplicitous. self serving. but no. they gave him all those traits and called him hero/love interest. s7 left a lot to be desired out of the characters and their relationships also gave us phat L’s such as the charmed ones are werewolves don’t worry about it and feminism peaked with naked women. shout out to zankou: demon, dilf, dub & the noir episode.

you know what? fuck it i’ll say it second worse season 5 genuinely fuck season five. this is probably a Very Specific beef 2 me But. i hate what they did to the charmed universe. this was the season that marked the transition of charmed from supernatural drama to campy soap which like. i love camp! i do! but fr. fuck this season and what it did to the worldbuilding. the early season have Such A Vibe to them man with warlocks and witches and just a couple niche monsters from assorted lore that the show took and made their own. season five opens with mermaids goes directly into fairytales then gives us superheros whatever the fuck was going on in that mummy episode the sandman leprechauns and nymphs. and i hate it for that. it takes away from this urban fantasy things that go bump in the night what lurks in the shadows of the back alleys of san francisco in favor of the ugliest cinderella dress ever put to television and an onslaught of horrible irish accents for a full episode. other issues with season five: cole’s still here? why? they don’t know and neither will you! we’re not redeeming him! phoebe’s not getting back together with him! yes he died we just refuse to let him go! the cherry on top of course being a cole-centric 100th episode. shout out to. hmm. lemme think about what i actually liked about this season. i like jason dean as a love interest i don’t remember what he did in s5 but i know he was there. the season finale i’ve talked about how stupid & shitty it was but idc i still love that episode and then shout out to bacarra the only original villain this season that was a proper serve. the crone gets second place.

next on this come on we all saw it coming season 8. it’s a bad season! and i get bts there was a whole lot happening budget cuts missing actor etc. but it goes beyond that. it was a bad season. billie and christie were bad. and i’ve said this before but billie in herself is not an inherently bad character. she was just the literal worst for the show. she was a dollar store buffy blonde confident cocky skilled and ready 2 fight evil But. we are not following her like we followed buffy we are following her mentors. it’s like if we had a show called giles that aired for seven seasons And Then buffy showed up. billie was insanely irritating to watch from our perspective and in general wasn’t like. well written. attempts to humanize her / give her more depth often fell flat. and then christy. oh nelly. oh my god. barely a character. not well acted but hey it would have been a miracle if she was. negatives include dumain who was a mess omg bringing back the triad bringing back the source billie & christy obvi and also involving homeland security. which is season 7′s fault which is why it’s the worst. dubs on the other hand include both coop and henry i really liked them the shoehorned love interests weren’t great but i like their characters i though the way the got rid of leo to save on the budget was really creative and gave us a great piper episode and of course the sugary sweet finale i love it i do what can i say.

yet another controversial choice aptly coming in fourth is season 4. i respect what season 4 set out to do. i think it was a good idea. long form narratives, keeping a darker tone, focusing on character-driven drama and growth. too bad it fucking failed miserably at all of this. cole as the source and phoebe as the queen of hell was just so so botched. they had a very unique opportunity following the death of prue to explore these characters and what it means to them to be charmed, to be witches. they saved the world but the cost is insanely high. they’ve lost an older sister. they’ve gained a new sister. how do you even begin to cope with all this? episodes such as hell hath no fury and brain drain fuck so hard because they work with exactly that. had the whole season been like those episode season four would sit at number one with flying colors absolutely no competition. but alas. we can’t have nice things. the show got so bogged down with phoebe & cole, in a way that was just so, so messy. for starters, whether you loved cole or hated him before, we can all agree source!cole sucked. he was such a strong 180 from what we had seen that the show had to make the source some type of possession to justify half the shit they were trying to pull. and then to pit phoebe and paige against one another over a man was just. disgusting. and the ending of course felt rushed because it was! they wrapped up that entire issue in a nice little bow much faster than they reasonably should have been able to. it could have been a great season. it was definitely not. shout out to the seer an iconic mastermind on barbas levels, as previously stated brain drain and hell hath no fury Specific shout out to piper’s scene at prue’s grave shout out to paige as a character i like what they did with her and um. yeah that’s it.

okay we’re exiting the shit tier in favorite of the good tier welcome to the upper half. kicking us off is season 6. season 6 did what season 4 could not in that it gave us a long form plot that still left plenty of room for like. normal demon of the week episodes. i love phoebe early in this season with her faboo haircut her brand new empathy power and her relationship with jason dean. obvious strikes against for whatever the fuck that baby crazy stint was and also the mata hari episode. yikes. i love paige’s hair color in this season nothing paige as a character necessarily stands out to me however i like how they seem to have hit the blend of work-magic with paige where she wants a life and career outside of magic however she still loves the craft and embraces is with an open heart and mind. season six also gives us chris who was a very fun male lead imo we really didn’t have many like him he’s bitchy. he whines and bitches a lot he’s got an agenda he’s a bit secretive but at the end of the day he just wants a family i like him. i like the character growth we see out of piper i like seeing her try to move on from leo i love seeing her get back together with leo i like her dynamic with chris and her fears about motherhood. i also liked richard but that one takes a lot of justification. L’s are witchstock hyde school reunion used karma off the top of my head also the paige/richard/addiction plotline was so tone deaf. also the girls were mean to darryl : ( he deserved so much better. dubs were chris as a character, tbh the episode little monsters, phoebe with empathy specifically saying i love you too to jason i could write a dissertation on that line alone also the courtship of wyatt’s father and i thought the reveals of evil wyatt and chris being piper and leo’s son were both fun and interesting plot twists.

coming in third is actually season 2 a season i really do love it’s just. it lacks structure. imo there is a lot to love about season 2 morality bites and pardon my past are both delightful time travel episodes we get jack sheridan and bane jessup two of my personal favorite prue love interests we get p3 h2o and a great prue plotline regarding the death of patty we get the super cute cupid episode it’s a great. collection of episodes. it’s not a great season. there’s just imo not a strong enough thread connecting the stories together it’s mainly held together by having the same characters in it over and over again i really liked dan personally but like. i knew we were wasting time there. he was just an obstacle. a super cute loving and caring obstacle who’s great with kids but lbr piper and leo were always endgame. wasting our time on dan was stupid. i do love the sister dynamics in season two “gotta hand it to those pesky little demons they sure have brought us closer together” but again. this season could have benefitted from a rex and hannah type or even like a cole or zankou. this season is less of a season and more of just like a handful of episodes, and while there are some fat dubs, there are also some definite swings & misses. shout out to the time travel episodes the prue centric episodes phoebe’s character growth and maturity throughout this season (e.g. her going back to college) and i also think the fashion got a lot more fun this season.

second place i’m saying season one season one was a really strong start and gave us these really compelling characters with interesting relationships between one another But. a lot of it just kinda falls flat. and credit where credit is due it was a brand new show getting its feet under it but the fourth sister feats of clay which prue is it anyway they just simply aren’t dubs imo. also i don’t like that 70′s episode bc again i am an asshole concerned about The Lore i can’t believe one bitch ass warlock caused the Charmed Ones to grow up without powers. it just really bugs me. all in all the plots as a whole like aren’t great imo they’re nothing to write home about (save for from fear to eternity) it’s really the characters that make this season so goddamn good.

first place congratulations to the one the only season three. this is just because it kinda hits all my requirements in that it has some banger one offs (e.g. all halliwell’s eve, the good, the bad, and the cursed) it has an overarching plot at the exact same time as the source becomes more prominent and obvi cole is also there with murderous intent i like the character growth we see especially from prue i like piper and leo finally get married overall i really like the aesthetic of this season that blends a darker urban fantasy tone with still some charmed fashion and whimsy. strikes against tbh phoebe and cole’s relationship i am insanely picky with my enemies to lovers and the do not come remotely close to cutting the mustard in fact they are almost immediately disqualified however from afar i can see and respect The Drama. shout out to recasting victor prue with pistols death as a character and shannen directing episodes

#and of course this is a matter of opinion i'm not expecting everyone to agree w me Howver #i think you'd also be hard pressed to talk me out of my opinion #like the closer you get to the top there's more wiggle room like what's the best season i think changes with the wind #but the shit tier stays shit tier in my mind it's a matter of personal preference and i personally prefer my season to be good #charmed #💌

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dragqueenpentheus · 3 years

Text

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #pyroc #midnight mass

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