#feel like you could judge them at least partly on one route

[brave-symphonia]

The more I find myself thinking about We Know the Devil, the more I think that I want to play each "route" in it twice. And that I want to really think on the endings of whatever each one is.

Like, I really feel like there is a lot in the ending to Jupiter's route to really look at and think about, and I feel like it makes me understand her a lot more. And I feel like it'll be the same for all of them.

Like, I feel like I can't judge each of these endings or routes or whatever unless I have a good understanding of all the characters. So i really want to try seeing how I feel going through everything once I've seen all the endings I can see, since I feel like by then my main gripe with the vn won't really be a factor.

Especially because my experience with this first playthrough of it felt like I wasn't really focused due to not grabbing onto the setting or the characters super well, and I already feel like that's changed a little bit.

Plus, with how short the game is, it feels really doable.

[theflowerofthecommonwealth]

Power Armor Punch Part Thirty Four

Masterlist

Nick: *keeping a close eye on her as they find themselves near the Milton General Hospital*

Geneveve: Such a wasteland... I shouldn't be shocked- my records show most places above ground are considered... devastated and decrepit.

Lucille: Not Everywhere... You'll find many places still have some semblance of civilization. Of non hostile life. It's not all bad. *checks her map for Goodneighbor*

Jasmine: (Quickly braids her hair into one long braid, putting it over her shoulder. Her eyes are flickering everywhere, taking in every building and structure as she stands at attention. No telling what could be hiding in them, what can sneak up on their little group… They must be a strange sight the four of them, and thats another problem. When she is out on her own, people tend not to shoot at her first because she either looks innocent and not a real threat, or they want to capture her alive. But now with her companions, there is no telling what people will think and do)

Lucille: *just starts walking without a word*

Geneveve: *walks after her quickly*

Nick: Lucille, please try to keep it slow. We do have someone who has quite a few injuries this time...

Lucille: We move slow, we're more likely to get shot. You might want to carry her if she can't keep up.

Nick: *frowns at her but he knows she has a point*

Jasmine: (Doesn't say anything, just keeps following along with an upbeat pace and a determined demeanor. She can keep up, pain just melts away when she is in survival mode, like she is somehow living above it. She can still somewhat feel it, but again she has walked around with WAY worse injuries…)

Nick: *still keeps an eye on her as they move through the Commonwealth*

Lucille: *Taking the least treacherous route to Goodneighbor. If they're quick they won't have to fight anything*

Jasmine: (She KNOWS that she isn't at her sharpest right now, her perception and reaction time has been seriously lacking. If she was traveling alone she'd probably be moving through dark alleyways and along rooftops to avoid anyone at all)

Lucille: *stops when she hears something on the rooftops*

Nick: What was that...? *drawing his revolver*

Lucille: Someone who just made their last mistake. *pulls out her tesla rifle with the name "Dr. Stein" written in blue paint on the side of the rounded casing. She aims for the roof*

Geneveve: *already has her gun drawn, carefully observing from a distance*

Jasmine: (Tilts her head, aiming her pistol on said rooftop and narrowing her eyes) (Quietly) “Think someone has the same idea as me…” (Judging by the noise on the roof shingles, it was lighter footsteps, a little jagged and disorganized as if they or it were scrambling)

Lucille: *lowers her gun* Doesn't look like they've noticed us yet. I say we keep moving. *starts walking*

Nick: *mutters as he follows* Just keep your ears peeled for gunfire...

Geneveve: *glances up at the roof again warily* I don't think they'll fire anyhow. The foot steps sound like they're sluggish and shambling. Ghouls.

Lucille: You can tell that from down here?

Geneveve: I was the type of Gen 2 courser's would call for back up- I have the latest sensors. *to Nick* If you ever want an upgrade, I'd be willing to trade-

Nick: Don't bother. The disadvantage keeps me humble... besides. Lucille put a lot of work making you into what you are now. Wouldn't want that going to waste, now would we?

Jasmine: (Still staring up, gun partly trained. She would go up there investigate but she doubts that Nick or anyone would allow that) (Quietly) “There also something bigger…” (She can hear another set of stumbling steps, this one a bit heavier than the others. From what she can hear, there is at least six sets of footsteps in all, maybe more) (Quietly) “A group… And a leader…”

Lucille: Could be a bloated glowing one... *just keeps charging ahead, keeping her ears trained on the noise* No sense getting into a fight we don't need to be in.

Nick: Agreed. *not waiting around to find out either*

Geneveve: *just following and occasionally glancing back up at the roof tops*

Jasmine: (Lowers her gun and marches up to be besides Nick again, keeping the rooftop in her peripheral vision. Feral Ghouls aren't a main concern to her, they all relatively do the same thing just like Super Mutants. It’s other people that she is most worried about and keeping an eye out for, like Raiders, Gunners. and Triggermen. Hell, maybe even some remaining members of The Brotherhood of they happen to be that unlucky)

Geneveve: *quietly to Jasmine* I'm sorry about before...

Lucille: *only briefly glances back then on the road, keeping an ear out for any distant gun fire*

Nick: *at the back to make sure if anything sneaks up from behind it's him they gotta deal with*

Jasmine: (Gives Geneveve a quick confused look before quickly snapping back into her focused glare and attention at their surroundings. She cant let herself let her guard down for even a moment)

Geneveve: *decides to clarify* At the shop- I seemed to have scared you...

Nick: *quickly makes sure he remembered to load his gun so he has a full clip if anything pops out from the alleys*

Jasmine: (Quietly, without even looking at her) “It is not your fault.” (She hates to be so dismissive to Geneveve, but right now she is more focused on not getting jumped. Plus she doesn't want to think of herself acting so scared and helpless, when she is suppose to be the very opposite)

Geneveve: ..... *feels in some way it was...*

Lucille: *shoots down some wild mongrels suddenly, quickly stopping to scoop up any meat she can scavenge in a short time*

Jasmine: (Shades her eyes to scan at the buildings higher windows, checking very carefully for any sniper posts. So far it seems clear, at least in this area. She scans the ground as well, noting that the mucked up earth had been recently disturbed with what seemed to be footprints, probably a bad thing)

Lucille: Oh hey... Allan's running another caravan to transport supplies. *smiles at the Mr. Handy and the Brahmin*

Geneveve: *chalking up Jas's behavior to being in the wasteland mostly... but she still thinks the girl somehow found her repulsive*

Jasmine: (Decides to move her switchblade from her pocket and into into her waistband, finding it easier to conceal and reach more discreetly from there. She gives a quick glance at the Mr. Handy and Brahmin, going straight back to keep an eye out. She notes that her vision is still quite hazy, blurring somethings together) (Whispering to herself) “Stupid bitch…”

Geneveve: *winces at Jas's words and looks away*

Nick: Stop that. No sense berating yourself for whatever it is you can't help.

Geneveve: *doesn't know if Jas was talking to her or herself*

Allan: *as they get closer* Greetings! May I assist you with anything?

Lucille: No, we're good. Thank you, Allan.

Allan: *cheerily* Of course.

Jasmine: (Ignores Nick and the Mr. Handy, continuing marching along with her hands always in reach of her gun or knife. She didn't mean to say that out loud, again. Dammit, the withdrawal really clogging her up) (Mumbling to herself) “Dumbass…” (She still wants more of that stuff in her system…)

Nick: *warningly* Rosalinda...

Geneveve: *still isn't certain who she's referring too when she says things like that. They grip the handle of their gun tightly*

Jasmine: (Turns to face Nick at the sound of her real name while slowing down her strides a little, giving the area another glance. Its a bit worrisome that hearing her name snaps her out of her survival mode…)

Nick: Stop calling yourself names...

Geneveve: *quietly, doubtfully* Is that what she's doing...?

Nick: She does this when she's traveling... and it's not very good for her mental well-being.

Geneveve: *quietly* I thought they were directed at me...

Jasmine: (Just blinks at both of them, her eyes flickering around. She'd say something back but right now isn't the time or place to get into a talk like this, so she just keeps going)

Lucille: Heads-up. We're about to run into a Raider camp. Don't stop to fight them, just keep moving through and they'll hopefully lose interest after a bit. *snickers* They're usually too lazy to give chase once we leave.

Nick: Got it. *readies his gun*

Jasmine: (Takes in a breath as she readies her pistol by her side, wishing she had her mask and hood with her. Cause Lord knows that Raiders take a special interest with her, going as far to try to track her down for miles)

Lucille: *decides to go around the camp instead so they're only flanked on one side if they start firing*

Nick: *looking up at the top of the walls warily*

Jasmine: (Keeping her guard up, making her footsteps completely silent and shoving down her fear. Part of her wants to stupidly hide behind Nick, but she cant and wont. She shouldn't even be thinking like a dumb child when she knows damn well that she can take down a full grown man) (Under her breath to herself) “Pathetic…”

Raider from the other side: Hey- you here that?!

Another Raider: Better not be more ghouls...

Lucille: *crouches, her chameleon armor activating*

Nick: *crouches, too*

Geneveve: *just following everyone else's lead*

Jasmine: (Bites her tongue, crouching and making herself as small as she possibly can, hiding in the shadows. She glances at everyone else, noting their positions in case a confrontation or gunfight breaks out. If they do happen to get into a battle, she will have to stick with the long range attacks to avoid popping any stitches)

Lucille: *taking it slow. Doesn't want to end up in a fight with Jas being wounded and Geneveve traveling with them*

Jasmine: (Out of all their members in their squad, she is keeping an eye on Geneveve the most. Mainly because she isn't sure how well they can hold their own yet, or if they can even bring themselves to end a life)

Raider: I found ya! *starts opening fire*

Nick: Oh, for crying out loud-! *starts shooting at the raider, hitting them square in the shoulder*

Geneveve: *frowns. They start aiming for the arm or shoulder to disarm them*

Lucille: *just aiming for the head*

More raiders: *start opening fire. Some start coming in from behind*

Nick: *hitting and kicking a few that thought they could sneak up on him with a pipe wrench or pipe*

Jasmine: “Shit…” (Backs up a little bit to give herself more space, squinting as she uses her scary good aim to fire at their heads and hearts if they are exposed. She hopes that the ones coming in close stay busy enough that they wont notice her standing aside, she looks like an easy target right now)

Geneveve: *takes note of that and backs towards Jas so she's less of an easy mark*

Raider: *runs towards Gen with a knife*

Geneveve: *doesn't even take a moment to process it- she grabs the raider's arm and throw them on their back, stepping on them and shooting them in the arms and legs. She picks up the knife and stabs another in the eye, then shoots them down in the shoulders and legs*

Lucille: *has her chainsaw out, sawing into any idiot who gets within less than a foot of her*

Nick: *still giving support from behind*

Jasmine: (Fires at the few running in, cursing herself because she is still seeing blurry and it’s knocking off her aim. She stops to shakily reload her gun, suddenly shrieking loudly when she feels a pair of strong arms wrap around her waist and lifts her up. Oh of COURSE they aren't shooting at her and instead try to grab her, why is she even surprised at this… How did she not hear them coming?)

Raider: (Squeezing the teen tightly enough to bruise) “Now Girl, don't you try and-...”

Jasmine: (Kicking their leg to make their death of a grip loosen a bit) “GET THE FUCK OFF ME!” (Uses her bodyweight to throw them forwards and off balance, sending the two of them tumbling to the ground. She groans in pain when she smacks into the dirt but wastes no time and quickly whips out her pocket knife from her waistband. She hurls herself on top of the Raider to keep them from getting up, pinning them down with one arm and her knees. They both struggle around for power until the teen manages to drive the knife into their throat, then into their head multiple times over with an angry cry)

Geneveve: *starts trying to fend off the ones going specifically for Jas*

Lucille: *switches to a very specific .44 revolver and starts gunning down raiders and giving Nick some fire support*

Nick: *nods at the help, holding his own pretty well at the back*

Jasmine: (Blood splatters over her face as she drives the knife in until their head is nothing but pure mush. She snatches their pocket knife from their pocket, shoving it in her shirt while still gripping hers. She looks up just in time to see another Raider only a few feet away and coming at her) “Fucking…”

The Raider: (Makes a mad dive for the girl)

Jasmine: (Rolls out of the way, kicking at their head right before they land. She goes to drive her knife into them as well, but this Raider is a lot stronger, bigger, and more armored than the last. They both end up aggressively tussling with one another the ground)

The Big Raider: (After a moment they manage to get their hands around the girls neck while kneeling on top of her, pushing her against the ground and attempting to strangle her out) “STAY DOWN!”

Jasmine: (Gasps for air, but not letting up the slightest. She is very much used to this thing being done to her by now, and knows exactly what to do to stop it. She twists her head to bite the Raiders arm as hard as she possibly can, tasting and smelling blood as her teeth sink into their flesh)

The Big Raider: (Yowls loudly, letting their grip on the girl falter) “YOU LITTLE BITCH!”

Jasmine: (Takes the opportunity to swish their legs out, overpowering them and switching position so its her aggressively choking them out against the ground) (Horsely coughing) “You should have just shot at me, make it easier on both of us.” (Twists their neck as hard as her strength can muster, a loud snap ringing out and the Raider stops moving)

Geneveve: *trying not to end lives if they can help it. They kick down another raider that's trying to grab Jas while she's preoccupied with the other brute*

Nick: *throwing grenades over the wall at the assailants... somehow hitting them squarely in the face when they do hit them*

Lucille: *has disappeared... presumably to chase down every raider Geneveve didn't incapacitate and give them a very slow and bloody death*

Jasmine: (Looks up in a bloody rage at the Raiders coming in at her and still not bothering to shoot, then at the rest of the group. She shakily stands up, grabbing a pipe off the ground and reloading her pistol) (Through gritted teeth) “Here is that weapon they wanted…” (Charges head on and full speed at the incoming wave of Raiders, switching between her gun and pipe to skillfully start picking them off one by one. If she is in any sort of pain from the movement or the tussling, she doesn't feel it as red clouds her vision and muffles her ears. There is just one goal in her mind, kill all the assaulters and make sure nothing will get in her way)

Geneveve: *backs away terrified as she witnesses the girl kill the raiders the synth had incapacitated only moments ago. She hopes Jas doesn't come for her next*

Nick: *shoots down another raider just in time to see Jas go on her blood path. He starts to give chase in case something does stop her*

Lucille: *nearly slaughtered most of the raiders in the camp with her ripper*

Jasmine: (Annihilating any Raider that gets in her path. If they had finally started shooting at her, she doesn't notice as she resorts to just using the pipe and knife because her pistol is out of ammo. Blood flies all around the teen as her mind gets more and more set on her goal to rid the place of all foes)

Another Raider: (Yanks Jasmine by her braid to halt her rampage, giving the girl a sharp and possibly deathly blow to the head)

Jasmine: (Screams out loudly, but again doesn't falter or even flinch at the punch, just whips around to face them snarling with bloodshot eyes. She shoves herself against them and onto the ground in yet another struggle of wrestling for the upper hand. Another strained scream escapes her throat when the Raider kneels on top of her hips to pin her down, but she is already stabbing and tearing at their back)

Nick: *shouts, witnessing this* JASMINE-! *shoots the Raider point blank through their head, dropping them easily*

Geneveve: *running up to the two of them* Is she okay?!

Nick: *holding his kid in his arms to examine the wounds* I dunno- WATCH YOUR LEFT-!

Geneveve: What-?

Raider: *tries to stab Gen in the neck*

Geneveve: *pulls their arm and pins them down. Hoarsely* Surrender Peacefully.

Raider: F*CK... YOU...!

Geneveve: *before she can stop herself, she's stabbing the Raider right through the eye with their own knife.... quietly* I'm sorry...

Jasmine: (Squirms and coughs in Nicks arms, still in red mode and pumped with adrenaline, determined to keep fighting to protect. She cant feel any pain, or hear all that much what they are saying. Her mind is dead set on the goal. The teen girl is covered in blood, either hers or the Raiders. Along with some dirt an and mud from her scuffling. Strangle marks are on her neck and there is a noticeable mark on her forehead from the blow she just received)

Lucille: *walking up* Phew... I think that's all of them...

Nick: Good... *back down to Jas* Rosie- the fight's over. You can stop now-

Jasmine: (Her squirming dies down a little as she looks around at the mess of dead bodies around her, panting with the focused killing machine glare still in her eyes. She needs to be sure… there can always be more. She starts pulling away from Nick to stand, weapons still in hand)

Nick: *scolding* No, Rosalinda.

Geneveve: I... don't detect any other organic life signs other than Jasmine and Lucille. *looking around at the camp grimly*

Lucille: Trust me. I checked them for it... *darkly holding up her bloodied ripper* Manually.

Jasmine: (Freezes at her name and Nicks tone, tense and blinking rapidly a few times while still breathing heavily. She clutches the bloodied weapons tightly, looking around once again at the carnage. Her mind is still foggy and blaring red, telling to not listen and go searching for any straggler's)

Nick: I know you're still in there, kiddo. Wake up. We still have a case to solve.

Geneveve: ... *thinks Jas's "programming" might be too strong for her to fight off. They know they weren't able to stop themselves from taking the life of that last Raider and it frightens them*

Jasmine: (Blinks again, her shoulders dropping as she lets go of the pipe to wipe blood out of her mouth. She stares at her bloodied hands for a bit, her red mode starting to wear off) (Quietly suddenly) “They did not try to shoot me…”

Nick: That is a bit odd... *concerned tone* Do you think you can walk...?

Jasmine: (Nods firmly, wiping more blood away. She ain't about to slow down now just because of some beating… or be more of a pain. If she hasn't passed out, she can tolerate it)

Lucille: You sure about that? You got hit pretty hard, Jas.

Nick: *kindly* I can carry you if you want, doll. It wouldn't be much hassle.

Geneveve: *spacing out, looking at the blood on their hands and clothes*

Jasmine: (Shakes her head at Nick, but stops to wince and bite her tongue to hold in a yelp. The rush was wearing off, she was now actually feeling the pain from the tussling and the hard hits she took. Her hands brush over her bruising neck, eyes going wide as it slowly starts to click all that happened…)

Geneveve: *thinking "This is what the Institute made me for" to herself*

Nick: *sees that realization in her eyes. Firmly* I'll carry you... *guiltily* I'm... sorry you had to go through that type of fight again...

Jasmine: (Quietly mumbling) “This is what “they” wanted.” (Dry chuckle) “The Raiders did not shoot me, oh God... But “they” knew people would not… haha… how did they even know people would want me…” (Stops and shakes her head at herself. Now isn't the time to process this, they just needed to get a move on) (Quietly to herself) “Pathetic bitch…”

Geneveve: *knows she's talking to herself at this point but it still hurts to hear her talk like that. Balls her hands into fists* STOP.

Lucille: *surprised at that* Geneveve...?

Geneveve: Just... stop... stop lying to yourself. Stop calling yourself names that just... don't fit... You're lucky. So, so lucky to be human. To be alive. To be strong enough to hold your ground... you want to see pathetic? Look around you at the people who just tried to kill us. Look at ME. *falls to her knees* Just stop directing it at yourself...

Jasmine: (Eyes goes wide at Geneveves words, her heart dropping while her mind goes partly blank. Geneveve had no idea what she was really saying, did she?) (Through gritted teeth) “Lucky? Hah, do not fucking SAY that to me you do not KNOW shit about me!! The world said “fuck you and suffer.” when I was born. It just threw EVERY hellfire it could, taking everything I ever loved and fucking me over and over again for no reason….” (Starts trembling, running a hand down her throat then her stitches) “Figuratively and Literally…. And it is not going to stop….” (Glances around the Raiders who she just wrestled and ripped apart)

Nick: That's enough, Rosalinda... *picks her up and starts carrying her piggyback style, keeping her arms over his shoulders as he walks on ahead*

Geneveve: *goes quiet again. Felt it needed to be said*

Lucille: *sighs. When they get far enough out of ear shot* Just give her time, sweetheart.

Geneveve: *sighs* I know...

Lucille: Besides I feel your pain... it gets tiring listening to all that negativity. All that... self hatred. It wears on a person and everyone around them.

Geneveve: I don't ever want to cause that kind of pain...

Jasmine: (Just lets herself be carried without any protest or complaint. Maybe she was strong enough to hold her ground, but she wasn't lucky, far from it. If you really thought about it, maybe she was lucky to survive all that shit without any lasting damage, but that was a blurry line)

Geneveve: I think the girl is blind to how fortunate she really is... I know I was only born quite literally yesterday but even I can see that.

Lucille: *sighs* And that's exactly why she won't listen to you. She thinks you're assuming you know what she's been through. She might be right, even.

Geneveve: I... Let's just get to Goodneighbor. I need to process this. Away from her. *starts walking after Nick*

Lucille: *follows the two synths and the younger girl, watching them warily*

Jasmine: (Hums to herself, closing her eyes and leaning her head on Nicks shoulder. If her Momma was here seeing how down she was, she'd probably say to count every blessing she still had, everything she was grateful for… Thats a sweet memory, the lot of them huddled together during cold winter nights under tons of blankets because they couldn't afford heating, just taking turns naming things they are thankful for. It worked, warmed them right up from the inside)

Nick: *looks down at her briefly with a soft smile*

Geneveve: *looking around them at the ruins. Finds it hard to believe people once lived there*

Lucille: *always ends up missing home when she sees the ruins*

Jasmine: (Keeps her eyes tightly closed, wanting to stay in the warm precious memory that was not tainted with shit)

Geneveve: *looks down. There isn't any sign of assailants so far... she feels it's best not to talk*

Lucille: Almost there...

Jasmine: (Opens her eyes to briefly glance around and strain her ears for any noise. She can tell through her hazed vision that they are close, but they all still need to be on alert)

Nick: *already preparing to lecture Hancock on trying to get Jas clean*

Lucille: *not really on guard. There's not usually any activity in this b part of town*

Jasmine: (The rush of the fight 100% wears off, so she slinks her head back down on Nicks shoulder from the pain and dull soreness) (Quietly to herself, almost as a joke) “I swear to God, if I get called Betty Boop again, I am breaking in some teeth…” (Half smirks to herself at a memory of her and her siblings getting a peek at the cartoon at their local diner, the owner kicking them out if they didn't buy anything)

Nick: What do you mean "Again"? *raises an eyebrow*

Geneveve: *doesn't get why... she doesn't see the resemblance*

Lucille: Oh hey. I think I see the neighborhood watch up ahead!

Jasmine: (Mumbling without looking up) “First time I came here, a couple of drunk guys called me that while following me out of the bar. I look nothing like her and I had my mask, so I do not know why. Maybe they just meant her… Demeanor? Thought they were being clever?” (Shakes her head against his shoulder) “Been called so much worse, that one was just weird…”

Nick: I wouldn't pay much mind to what a drunk says. It's not very reliable, I've found.

Lucille: *Already walking ahead of Nick to the front doors of Goodneighbor*

Neighborhood watchman: Come to see the mayor?

Lucille: Well not exactly. Came to ask Magnolia if she could take a fellow synth under her wing. Teach her how to sing.

Watchman: *sees Geneveve* Ha. Good luck with that. She might not be so accepting.

Lucille: We'll see.

Watchman: *nods at Nick following Lucille through* Keep your hands to yourself detective...

Nick: Not a promise I can keep, but I'll try.

Jasmine: (Stays completely quiet and still as they pass by the watchmen) (Whispering to Nick) “You are right… but it is hard when they grab at you while saying it…” (Snorts to herself. Right after one of the drunks had said that while pulling her close, she had proceeded to slam them into a wall… The indent was still there to her knowledge)

[jeweled-blue-eyes]

Any unpopular opinions on Death is the only ending for the Villainess?

overrated. It's full of abuse apologism, dare I say pro imperialism, pro slavery, all women in this manhwa only exist to torment the mc and get their punishment while the men (only if handsome!) are forgiven

the characters are flat. We don't know anything about their likes and hobbies. Iklies at least has the excuse that as a slave he has no time or money to pursue an interest but the other male leads are nobility. They should have a life that doesn't revolve around Penelope.

Iklies being a yandere doesn’t mean his character has to be two dimensional. Yanderes are capable of following their own agenda aside from their obsession with their s/o. Let him have that.

Iklies deserved better

the Eckarts deserved to die or put in prison

why is Derrick a love interest when he lusted after a 12 year old as an adult?  Why is no one talking about that?

Callisto should be executed for the genocide in Delman. If he was old enough to participate in a war, he would have been old enough to be judged for his crimes according to the law of his time. But I think even if we applied the modern law he could be tried for everything he did from age 18-23. And if someone tries to apply the insanity defense here then by that same logic he shouldn't be allowed to rule a country but send to therapy.

villains who are only complicit or have an understandable motive get harshly punished, meanwhile the main perpetrator or the one who indirectly caused this goes free (the cook loses her job, Emily, a child abuser, stays, the imperialist and enslaver gets his happy ending, the slave loses the girl he loves and is villainized for rebelling and wanting his abusers to die)

the fandom has a problem with abuse apologism. I saw someone once calling Penelope paranoid and partly guilty for the abuse against her.

Penelope has plot armor

I’d be more interesting if she had lives left she can use up (maybe 5 for each love interest?). Adds more suspense as we’d know she’ll die but wouldn’t know when or how she would die.

Callisto/Penelope scenes seem forced. When he held his sword against her neck and called her a rat and she said she loved him I cringed so hard. Was that supposed to be romantic? Her family back in Korea used to call her a rat. So far iklies and Vinter are the only LI’s who haven’t degraded her. But Vinter is a plot device and Iklies a villain.

this has to do with personal taste: I hate the fan service (men showing their abs) and the manhwa could do better without them. This is a death/survival game. How the narrative tries to insert Callisto scenes and attempts to make them seem romantic breaks me out of the flow. It just feels misplaced.

the behaviour of some characters is inconsistent (i.e. Penelope decided to keep the abusive maid around with the excuse that no one can gurantee her if her replacement won’t be worse, but then after establishing her place in the Eckart household she decides to leave for the palace where Mr grimreaper crown prince lives, the people that ordered the assassination and hundreds of servants that no one can gurantee aren’t dangerous because they could be working for the queen. Also why did she even expect the Eckarts to help her after everything they’ve done to her. That was foolish.)

making the og! heroine the villain, making the og villainess secretly a saint/mage is cheap. Been there. Done before. The manhwa had such a unique premise but then it fell into the usual cliches I thought it would avoid.

Penelope should have attempted to run away when she had nothing to lose anymore. I wonder why she never tried to go the independent route because if I remember correctly some Otome games do provide routes where you don’t necessarily need a man. (Arcana Famiglia I believe where Felicia can become a mafia boss without marrying anyone). The fastest way to end the game in Code Realize is not choosing a man and travelling the world alone. (It counts as a bad end but still). What I’m saying is it’s strange Penelope never tested out other options.

the abuse against Penelope should have had an effect on her health. Doesn’t vitamin defiancy lead to poor eyesight? Things like that.

I find it hard to believe Ivonne was such a nice person when she was raised by classist and racist people. The Eckarts probably idealized her in their memories.

Cha Siyeon pursuing a degree in archeology..you won’t get a lot money and it is a scientific and academic discipline which doesn’t have a lot of practical application, I heard you have to suck up to rich people and fight a lot with rich people (who are for example annoyed to stop construction work on their factory because they could damage an important artefact or historical burial site). So if she did it to escape her rich family she’d just be at square one. I’ve heard her family has already sabotaged her life in hopes she’ll return to them (the shitty appartment for example), so choosing a field to major in that isn’t very lucrative is well maybe not a good idea. I get it she did it because it’s a subject she’s passionate about but as someone rational as her I’m not sure if it was a good decision or even in character. (debateable) If you want independence, money comes first. I’ve read yelansdicecharm‘s concept of Siyeon being a computer major and that by hacking the game to achieve a happy ending she caused the error which sucked her into the game world. I think that concept is very cool.

[thickenmyblood]

hey maca :)) I have sth that I’d love to hear your input on! (wall of text incoming so beware- I’m absolutely not mad if you don’t want to answer lmao). Basically it’s about how you portray women in your works and to what extent you see that portrayal mirrored in the canon books. I have noticed that a lot of writers tend to go a traditional route with for example daughters not being heirs like you also mentioned in an answer for a wtsioa ask on here. Considering the cultures Vere and Akielos are based on that’s obviously very logical and a lot of authors (including you) make it work fantastically! Yet personally I never got the vibe of Vere and Akielos being as patriarchal in canon, mostly because the Information we get is kind of confusing. On one hand damen is a walking manosphere (and. all of Akielos in general as well) without any prominent female figures in his life but on the other hand damen only ever speaks appreciatively of for example the female vaskian warriors. Both countries seem to ban women from the army yet Damen also refers to a warrior queen. The regent is a total misogynist but with the wording Laurent uses it almost seems like that is more the exception and not the general rule of veretian court life. Both countries also have ties to Vask, an exclusive matriarchy and Akielos is said to be similar to Patras which Pacat has stated is also partly a strong matriarchy due to vaskian occupations in the past. I could go on for a lot longer but I guess that damens overall positive attitude towards women and especially stereotypically spoken masculine women is what sticks out the most to me. It just seems kind of misplaced in a world that supposedly is as sexist as the original cultures from our world. Which is why I’d say both countries do have gender roles but are overall a lot more egalitarian than their respective real world og cultures. But that’s only my take and I’d love to hear more on what others think about the portrayal of women in canon and how they chose to portray it in fanfiction. Love you and your new work, hope you’re doing well❤️

HELLO!!! Thank you for asking me interesting stuff :, ) you always have the best questions and my sad little inbox is open to you any time, friend. I divided this into parts, so:

My portrayal of women: I need to work on this a lot lmao. I’m not proud of any female character I have ever written for this fandom, and I’m also not proud to say I struggle horribly when it comes to writing female OCs, especially if the story is not about a female character that is a literal projection of me. Or Bella Swan (yes, Twilight literally shaped my sad little brain and the way I write and consume fiction).

Authors writing female characters in a “traditional” way (for fantasy settings): I can’t speak for other authors but I definitely think, in my case, that using the “it’s a patriarchal society, women have no rights, women can’t be heirs, etc.” blueprint is a matter of being lazy. It’s quick, and easy, and it’s been done before so we all know how it works and a) it’s unlikely that you’ll mess it up (in the plot hole kind of way) and b) it’s obvious that most readers know how the usual system works and so you don’t have to spend paragraphs or even chapters explaining it to them. I am very lazy when it comes to world-building for fics. Why? Because when I’m writing fanfiction I don’t give two shits about the world, I just care about the characters doing Things and having Feelings. The moment you start to question these issues (a society where women can join the army, where they can be heirs, where maybe they can have multiple husbands, etc.) a billion issues arise because it’s not the “usual way” and so you’ll have to deal with “unusual problems”. See: plot holes, info-dumping, etc.

Vere and Akielos in canon: I think the books get very, very confusing at times when it comes to gender roles in that specific world. They also get very confusing about how royalty works, in my opinion. So:

Damen never mentions female influences in his life, not even nannies or wetnurses or anything. He mentions past queens and his mother, but even then… It’s always struck me as “what the actual fuck” that we get no information on Egeria. In TSP, he doesn’t even read as curious to me, especially when I think of that line that goes something like “oh, well, he’d never asked how tall she was”.

Then you have Jokaste, who is highborn and also… perhaps trained in politics? It’s unclear to me if she’s ever been directly involved in meetings or been an active member of the Council or even been allowed to study these issues. Clearly, she’s smart and capable and cunning, but like… how? Did she have private tutors? Is she a self-made woman? Like, what’s up with that? Are women allowed to engage in public politics? Are they allowed to be kyroi?

IMO, Damen complimenting the female warriors in Vask has to do with how appreciative he is of war-related stuff. Like, he thinks people with his own qualities are neat. We see this time and time again in the books—having honor, being brave, respecting one’s family, protecting those who need protecting… He compliments these things when he sees them in others, especially in Laurent. Obviously one of the big changes in Damen as a character is that he goes from being daddy’s boy to being like “well, actually… maybe war isn’t always the answer, and maybe war isn’t always honorable”. The Vaskian warriors prove themselves worthy of praise in a “manly” way, if that makes sense. (In the same way, Laurent proves himself in the Okton, not so much to Damen but to other Akielons). So, in essence, War > Any issues he may have about women doing Stuff.

Don’t judge me for this but I can’t remember the Regent talking about women. Do you have any quotes about that? I feel like Book 1 is super rich when it comes to world-building stuff and yet it’s the book I remember the least. I know he obviously has a preference for boys and not girls, but I don’t recall him having interactions with Vannes or ladies at court? I’M SORRY I’M SO STUPID but I don’t own the book so I can’t exactly word search my way out of this one, and so instead of saying stupid stuff, I’m asking anyone reading this (lol, you and my mom probably) to please tell me what canon says on this issue.

Ties to Vask: Er, yeah, I mean… They’re clearly not at war with Vask and have some sort of economic deal (there are Vaskian pets in Arles? Which makes me wonder if they, like, buy them from Vask? Or if the pets are Vaskian and turn into pets in Vere? Slaves are not like pets so I don’t know?), BUT just because they have deals with this kingdom/are on good terms with the ruler does not mean they necessarily approve? Like, maybe they’re like “yeah, it’s weird they give women so much power, but also I need that silk/leather/WHATEVER, so I’ll shut up about that”.

“Akielos is said to be similar to Patras which Pacat has stated is also partly a strong matriarchy due to Vaskian occupations in the past.” Is this in the books or is this something she said in an interview/post-releasing the trilogy? I know in the books there’s a quote that Akielos and Patras are similar because they both have slaves, but other than that I can’t quite remember anything about Patras? Like, I don’t recall Pacat giving us extensive and thorough world-building on either nation, at all. Once again, I am asking you for more explanations on this because I literally don’t remember.

4. My opinion and a Stupidity Disclaimer: As I’ve said above, there’s a lot of stuff I don’t remember and so I’m not trying to preach to anyone reading this or even saying that I hold the truth about… anything. I’m answering questions as I see fit and asking more questions when I run out of answers.

I believe world-building is not one of Captive Prince’s strong points. I will not elaborate on this because this is already long enough but there is simply, in my opinion, not enough material to reach any solid conclusions when it comes to world-building questions such as the role of women in Vere and Akielos, how compulsory homosexuality affects the development of highborn men and women in Vere, exactly what makes Akielos’ view on women different from Vere’s (if there’s any difference at all), the history of gender roles in this world and how it’s evolved up until canon, how Lamen can solve the heir issue without recurring to, once again, “the usual stuff” (concubines, bastards, marriage to women, etc.). It’s clear from what I’ve read that Pacat has come a long way as a writer and that her new trilogy has a lot more in-depth explanations to world-building questions, but this is not the case with CP, and so I’m afraid my answer to most of this is “I don’t know, and I don’t think anyone can know for sure”.

Lastly, I think I struggle a lot with understanding the role of women in this universe because I simply did not see enough women doing stuff, so I don’t know what’s permitted, what’s unacceptable, what’s illegal, what is straight-up execution worthy, etc. This is not me complaining about the lack of female characters in CP, at all, which I know is contradictory to stuff I’ve said in the past (I answered a couple asks a year ago about how I’d wished we’d gotten Vannes’ POV or Jokaste’s POV in the short stories). I’ve changed my mind, and so I think Pacat is entitled to write whatever she wants, just like I’m entitled to talk shit about KR with any living soul who will listen lmao.

To end this on a spicy note, I think sometimes we consume the wrong media and then complain because it doesn’t have what we wanted. If you’re looking for a trilogy with strong, fleshed-out female characters, Captive Prince is not for you. If you’re looking for a trilogy on female struggles and, I don’t know, defying… the male gaze… Captive Prince is not for you. There are plenty of books out there that focus exclusively on female characters, featuring sapphic relationships, and dealing with gender issues. WHICH IS NOT TO SAY WE SHOULDN’T BE HAVING THESE DISCUSSIONS. This is not about this particular question, but more about a lot of posts I’ve seen floating around… complaining about Pacat’s writing and the themes she didn’t explore.

If anyone has made it this far, thank you for reading, and know this is NOT me telling you what to think. This post is an open question that anyone can engage with, although I hope people will engage with this directly and on this platform, instead of… taking it somewhere else where I sadly can’t engage back! Unlike what happened with our awesome fat Laurent discussion, I will be replying to any questions I get on this (Note: I did not reply to most of those questions because a long time had passed and they were sort of repetitive).

[lilyrachelcassidy]

Summer Nights (3)

A/N: INDEX

Warnings: alcohol, language, sexual alludes, and... that’s it??

Word Count: 3.7k

Tags: @war-sword @paradigmax @winnsmills @idkatee @bforbroadway @okaydraco

So her name was Y/N.

Draco couldn't help himself but wonder about her for the past few days, after their encounter in the restaurant. As he thought more and more of her, he decided she was more of a changeable person, judging on what he had learned about her; timid and coy one day in the lobby when he first arrived, and plainly confident on another when she approached him to return his fucking wand.

And did she believe in that fictive tale about him playing a magician? Did she sense his sudden abashment when she started to question him on the subject?

He blamed himself for the whole situation, which could have never happened if he only were more careful. He assumed he had lost the wand when his mother furiously dragged him back to his hotel room from the bar he had stopped by for a while. Perhaps, it was when he had handed the receptionist, Y/N, the letter, and it just dropped out of his pocket as he was taking an envelope out.

Fortunately for him, it found its way back. So he didn't have to trouble his head with that now, right?

One issue, however, stuck to his thoughts and vividly came back every time he glanced at his hand, only to see blurry words written with a hard-to-efface ink. Of course, by none other than Y/N.

A few days back, she had scribbled her name and a number on his palm, and since then, he tried to figure out what it was for. He knew he couldn't walk out to the city and stop people in the middle of the pavement to ask for an explanation for the note because it would be as irrational and bizarre as it sounds. The second thought was to ask his mother for an additional conjecture about that by sending an owl. But then he quickly remembered, he didn't have access to any of owls here and -- so and so -- he didn't know the address Narcissa was staying at.

So both options were excluded.

Soon enough, however, the situation cropped up. Someday around six in the morning, still sound asleep and immersed in the dreams, the strange, alarming sound rang up in his bedroom, echoing off the walls and waking half of the death of him as he heard it. He flopped off his bed with the sheets falling along with him, and he began looking for the source of the noise. Then he noticed: a white handset and a set of ten digits next to it; he picked it up -- it was only a hotel checking up if he needed anything.

From then on, everything lined up and made a perfectly logical sense in his head -- it was a muggle device to communicate with each other. If you were desperate enough not to meet up with somebody in the real-life, you were likely to click nine digits and either meet with the receiver's voice or voicemail on the other side. So here was a purpose of the number.

Draco also discovered these things were so-called phones. And they were sold in various forms and types like the models of brooms in the Wizarding World -- from less to most exclusive ones. Little did his consciousness helped him, but after an hour, he was already out in the city and walking next to the shops' exhibitions and searching for an electronics store to buy himself one of those.

Why did he want to buy the phone? He could lie and say that it was only in case of emergency. But admitting truthfully to himself, he felt a nagging curiosity about those devices and wanted to understand this part of the muggle world. And something, more of a hunch than reasoning, told him that he soon might be needing one of those.

Later that day, after wandering for almost an hour and stepping into some cafeteria for lunch, he was finally holding a fucking iPhone in his hand. It had a lot of fancy shining buttons and a small, black partly-bitten apple on the back, and some kind of virtual assistant (at least that's what he had heard from a salesman) Siri with a very posh British accent. Having been advised to purchase it, Draco did so even without a second thought.

He paid for it with some muggle money his mother provided him before her departure, and walked out of the store, having it packed in a nice paper bag with a receipt and a SIM card. He decided on opening it when he reaches his room, and meanwhile, look around the area for some entertainment or something in those terms, to preoccupy himself.

Actually, Draco hadn't been too much in foreign countries, and hauling him out to Muggle London was a miracle, much more to Muggle Paris. He could find a similarity, but it was much different here -- cars honking at each other at the traffic jam; countless shops with clothes; restaurants with delicious food; people babbling at one another in French but also in Italian and German, and English. It was chaotic; it was loud, and he had to watch his feet in order to not trip over by someone else.

Draco felt lost in that mess. Random people encouraging him to visit the shops he would never intend to drop by, strangers pushing him in a rush and mumbling indistinct 'Sorry' for stepping on his shoes, some even too bothered to even look at him. Partly, he wished he had never listened to Narcissa and instead spending time with Thoe, Blaise, or whosoever and talking about irrelevant stuff like the score of the last Quiddich match (Banchory Bangers against Falmouth Falcons) or about the latest affairs with the Ministry of Magic.

And what was he even doing here?

In mere seconds, he decided on changing a route back again to the hotel instead of meandering aimlessly and optimistically, waiting for some godsend to find.

What he wasn't, however, considering was actually finding some godsend in front of the revolving doors of the hotel building.

Yet again, as if some supernatural powers brought them to the same place every time, he was standing on the opposite side of the door where Y/N. It was the late afternoon, so instead of wearing the usual white shirt in the composition of black jeans, she had a green top and striped, yellow shorts with a small watch on her wrist.

She was turned, slightly to the side, so it was her profile he saw as she waved probably at one of her friends, smiling broadly. Draco never really paid much attention to the girl, especially to her looks, but now as his eyes roamed over her standing figure in those a little too revealing clothes, he felt a gulp forming in his throat. Her hair was falling on her shoulders, the beam plastered to her face, and she seemed to be a radiating sphere of positivity.

For the last time, she blew her friend a kiss, and then she was looking at him, infinitely shocked at the sight of him behind the window, staring at her. Draco blinked, snatching out of thoughts.

Y/N made her way out, gripping her big handbag and throwing it hastily on the shoulder and a glowing grin waving over her face again. "Nice to see you again," she said. "I thought you would call."

He furrowed his brows, detecting the faint trace of hope in her voice and feeling his heart take up on the speed. "Well... I was just about to. In the room. I bought a phone..." He lifted the sack in his hand. "...and was about to dial your number."

"Really?" she asked, slightly startled and happy at the same time. She brushed some of her hair behind the ear. "Didn't you have the phone?"

"I left it at home." It was the quickest lie he could conceive. He playfully rolled his eyes, indicating the slight amusement at his alleged absentmindedness. "Just heading back from the shop."

She laughed at that. "Right." Suddenly, her cheeks were covered in a light scarlet, and she dropped her gaze at her feet for three seconds, as if she was about to share something very, very secretive with him. Then she was eyeing him again. "Listen... I've just ended a shift. Maybe you would like to go somewhere? I promised I'll show you around the most interesting spots. Are you up to that?"

Draco contemplated, taking in a small breath. Some part of him really lingered to give it a shot and go out with her, seeing where it carries them, as spontaneous as it was. It wasn't a date, and she was practically a stranger, but... what kind of a stranger! A quiet voice in his head told him this was what kept him away from the idea; disclosing his doubts -- her sparkling with joy eyes and the effect she had on him. A mere fact of him pondering the question was pure evidence it mattered to him, and he definitely tried to kick in with a good impression.  

That left him with no more answer than: "Yeah, sure."

For some reason, Y/N let out a sigh of relief and relaxed a little, looking as if she was about to hear bad news but heard the contrary instead. "Great!" she exclaimed cheerfully. A little too cheerfully, she realized, as soon as she spoke up because the embarrassment welled up on her face. Yet another blush brushed her cheeks, and she chuckled at herself. "Sorry. Bad habits from the reception."

Now it was his turn to chuckle. He liked it, actually, but obviously wasn't going to say that out loud. "Don't mind," he assured her. "Shall we--"

"Before we do," Y/N cut him in, already guessing the upcoming rest of the sentence. "I suggest you leave that stuff..." She pointed her finger at the bag he was carrying. "...in the room. We might be wandering some hours in the heat. So it might not be the best idea."

Draco nodded, silently agreeing with her pertinent advice. "I'll meet you downstairs in... five minutes, then."

She shifted a little, still grinning like a maniac and watching him with sparkling eyes. "Okay," she said, as Draco was making to walk past her, feeling the strangest hint of excitement creeping in his chest. As he was nearing the doorway, he heard her shouting behind his back, "I'll be waiting here!" And the tiniest of his rare smiles formed on his lips.

XOXOXOXO

"So tell me something about yourself, Draco." Y/N looked at him, a light of interest entering her eyes.

As decided, they had met up a few minutes later in front of the entrance to the hotel and then took on the route. Draco had asked her about any potential propositions of where there should go, to which Y/N only smiled mysteriously and said it was a surprise.

So now they were walking hand-in-hand, taking almost the same pace as they strolled in the rhythm of the roads. The buzz still could be heard, and people prattling loudly, but this time -- as Draco noted -- instead of crowding in the center of the noise, Y/N led him through some stealthy alleys only a real dweller could know about. There were still laughs and talks coming, but much quieter.

"What do you want to know?" he asked, not quite comprehending how he should answer her question. He had been in some relationships, some successful and some not, but no one had really paid much interest in him. Not really him.

"Uh, you know. Where do you hail from, what are your hobbies, why did you come to France? Whatever you want, actually." Y/N chortled, offering him a small smile of encouragement. The sun rays were smoothly emphasizing her beauty; skin glistening under the daily light. Draco couldn't help himself but think of how her hands would feel on his shoulders and--

'Focus Draco,' he scolded himself for drifting far, far away with his imagination.

"Well," he started. "I'm from England, what you can guess by my accent. I play piano, learned Italian and Spanish, and...you know, basic stuff." He omitted the part he was a captain of his Quidditch team at school for almost five years which was his biggest pride. "My mother forced me to come here."

"Oh," Y/N seemed to be a little surprised by his confession because she made a fish-like face. "Didn't you want to come?"

"Not quite," Draco admitted truthfully. Before she was able to ask him for a reason for that, he outstripped her. "Had a tough time lately. My friend...died."

Y/N stared at him, mouth slightly agape, and in an instant, her expression turned from cheerful to a regretful one. "I'm sorry," she said, massive uncomfortableness visible on her face.

He shrugged, making his faultless poker face to the game as if it didn't affect him at all -- blank and uncaring. But it hit him. Always did. He didn't like to talk about his post-war experience; even recalling it in his mind was torture.

'If she only knew,' Draco thought. 'She wouldn't be so eager to get acquainted.'

Before he could pay off with as much interest as she did to him, Y/N was gesturing excitedly to the name on the corner of the building, located right next to the extensive, artificial beach with impeccably clean water. There were quite a few people enjoying themselves and sitting on the warm sand, but not throng as Draco could expect from a place like that. "Here we are!"

Not only the sand, but a minibar was there as well: a small deckhouse in the midway of the shore and pavement; a few wooden stools; and the bartender who was shaking a cocktail mixer in his hands.

Shortly after, however, the man behind the counter noticed them approaching. He shot Draco a brief look, and then his gaze landed straight at Y/N, who also perceived him glancing at her. He seemed to be happy at the sight of her, and his eyes swept momentarily over her figure, perhaps identifying if it really was a person he thought it was, and then he gestured for her to come closer. Y/N seized Draco's forearm, tugging him to come along with her, and Draco, left without any other choices, followed.

Y/N began speaking something French with him, and he heatedly answered her back in a sort of enthusiastic voice. Apparently, they must have known each other because, after seconds, they started joking around, laughing, and patting each others' shoulders like old friends. It took quite a moment, but the bartender eventually focused his attention on Draco, who was standing next to Y/N and was trying to make any sense out of the conservation. The man asked something, curiously arching his brow yet again at Y/N, who flushed suddenly. Clearly flustered with his question, she playfully smacked him at the top of his head and turned to face Draco.

"Sorry for that," she said, putting both of her elbows on the countertop and making a slight pout of guiltiness. "It's just an old friend of mine. I used to come here a lot in the past, so we know each other... pretty well, I guess."

That arose Draco's curiosity, and he didn't miss a chance to ask her. "Don't you come here anymore?"

"No." The readiness of this reply surprised him a little bit. She bit her lip and let her eyes drift at her shoes, which -- Draco noticed -- was her typical reaction when she was nervous. "I... I used this place to meet up with my boyfriend. My father didn't approve of our relationship -- he assumed there was something iffy about him and that he had bad intentions." Chuckling dryly, she tried to cover up her emotions, though the sadness was hitched to her voice. "He was right. He used me and then dumped me, saying it meant nothing."

Although he felt an urge to hug her, he held it back and stared at her, not really knowing what to say. Should he console her by telling her the man was a pig and she clearly deserved better? Or should he keep silent, only proving himself to be a good listener? It was very confusing for him to be around girls who cry and complain and expect reassurance in their words. He witnessed Pansy weeping a lot of times, but she was the one to instruct him what to do by throwing herself at him and lingering in the embrace. But Y/N was new to him, and it was no easy way to find out what she wanted him to say.

"Sucks," he uttered under his breath before the awareness kicked in.  

What the fuck, you dolt?! Is it how you want to comfort her?

Fortunately, Y/N didn't receive his words as critically as he because her eyes lighted up, and she giggled softly. "Yeah... But I learned from that. I try to be warier now."

The bartender poked her suddenly on the shoulder, making some mumbling and incomprehensible sound. Y/N nodded and slightly tilted her head to have a better view of Draco. "Jean asks if you want a drink. He recommends Brave Bull. Brags that he can do the best one in the country."

"Mhm... Let it be it," he agreed, giving up on his usual liquor and dipping into more muggle-like specials. He attempted to force a smile on the lips, trying to give it more of a tone of a request than a demand.

She reciprocated the gesture, and then she turned to her friend, leaning casually against the bar and expertly translating the conversation. He only nodded, smiling, and grabbed the nearest bottle of some booze to pour the contents into the glass along with some other ingredients.

"Here you go," the bartender, Jean, tried out his amateur English, but remnants of French accent could be heard. He laid two glasses of alcohol -- one fiercely brown; the other one, blue with a cocktail umbrella inside -- on the countertop and grinned. Before Draco could take out some cash to pay, Jean's voice echoed again, still with a little stammering accent. "Free!"

Y/N and Draco made their way to a nearby bench, both calmly sipping their drinks and looking at the horizon as the sun set down, disappearing out of your sight. It was strange for Draco how comfortable he felt in her presence; the comfort he hadn't experienced for years in anyone's company. Although he was aware you had met a few days ago, something in your relationship gave him enough space to be himself. And he liked it.

Draco chanced to glance at Y/N, and she was already looking.

"I like coming here," she started hastily, as to conceal she was staring. "It's calming."

As an excuse to tear their eye contact, Draco scanned the beach again, and he could definitely get her point. The place was nothing but charming. "Agree."

"You know... It was my inspirational area when I drew. I first found it when I got into a huge fight with my father. Since then, I have used it as an escape from the outer world. It was a mistake that I shared it with my ex, but... you seem to be a proper person."

Draco didn't miss the compliment, and a barely visible blush danced on his cheeks. He felt his pulse speeds up, heart pounding at the sudden realization of their proximity. "You drew? Is it past tense?"

"Yes." Y/N nodded swiftly, grunting. "I love to capture the moments I find beauty in: people, places, specific objects. I even aspired to go to art studies. But..." She exhaled deeply, preparing herself to continue. "...they are too costly. My father says so... I don't blame him; I know he tries. But I stopped myself from having hopes."

Draco listened, and the pity churned his stomach. Taking a nip of his drink, an idea popped up in his head. "Do you have those drafts?"

"Right now?" Y/N asked, shocked, to which Draco responded only with a short nod.  "Yes, I usually carry them --er-- in my bag. I had to throw them away... but I just couldn't."

"Can I see?"

Surprisingly, for the first time, as Draco saw, reluctance appeared on her face. She deflated, apparently battling with doubts. "Ummm... Yes." And then she slipped her hand into her motley bag, rummaging intensely. After mere seconds, she finally found what she was looking for -- the set of papers bound neatly around by a fine twine and clip, to the additional perseverance.

Y/N passed him, what seemed to be many hours of her solid work, and he examined them closely. What Draco could say is that he wasn't an expert in the field, but he unconditionally believed that those sketches required a lot of talent to draw as precise as they were. He was in awe, really -- the accurate contours given the best preciseness; the attention paid even to the smallest details; gradings made with soft touches of a pencil. The drawings presented a lot: random people walking in a rush, natural landscapes, some sculptures lined up in front of a building, even the least relevant objects like shoes or an apple. That, of course, didn't discourage Draco from watching further -- he flipped the pages, soundlessly, and a little too fascinated to utter a thing.

"And what do you think?" asked Y/N, nervously tapping her fingers on her thigh and (unnecessarily) preparing herself for a flow of criticism. Her gaze darted between Draco's face and the sketches.

"I... think you have a gift," he complimented her, weighing the great truth in his words.

"Really?" Y/N asked him in disbelief, blushing profusely. "Thanks! But --er-- you can take them if you want. It'd be easier for me to know I give them in the good hands than throwing them away."

The 'good hands' comment flattered Draco, and he felt almost honored to accept the offer. "Yes. Thank you." He buried the works deeply in his pocket.

He would definitely make good use of those. He had a plan.

XOXOXO

A/N: Okay, hi everyone! It was supposed to be longer, but I decided to divide it into more chapters with less word count instead. Nothing is happening yet, but you can already feel some tension, right? :D The next chapter is going to be super, super short. So I might be posting it within two days or so??? Idk yet, and it’s not a promise because I have a nice surprise (spoiler! a new one-shot) coming and a few requests to answer, so it might also take a moment. But please, stick with me :D If anyone wants to appear on the tag list, write in comments, DM, or wheresoever!

[ravenadottir]

Everybody either loves or hates Bobby’s route because he’s loyal and there’s no drama, but what do you think would have made his route spicier (in a good way)

ooh, ok! i think i’ve answered this one before, but i can’t find the ask. so if it comes out exactly like the other one, it’s because i truly stand by it!

so, i like what they’re doing with bobby’s attitude now... the boy is petty as fuck and doesn’t step forward if you don’t laugh at his joke. I LOVE THAT, BECAUSE IT IMPLIES HE KNOWS HIS VALUE, as he should. good for him!

before, you could be as mean as you wanted, and get very little back, just the frown faces. so, i’m glad he has more of a tough personality.

now! to make his route better:

🧁 keeping the player trope: and debunking it by making bobby say how much he learned about himself in his time in the villa. partly because of the friendships he has, partly because of mc. “since i met you it wasn’t about the money anymore.”

🧁 another girl liking bobby: every other boy has a second girl into them (in rahim’s case three!). having that little moment of “yes, but i’m choosing him because i like him, jane doe” would’ve been superior. kind of like how it happens to lottie on gary’s.

🧁 make him dig chelsea’s energy, because let’s face it, they would’ve been such a cite couple! possibly a comment or two about how interesting she is. he’s not doing anything wrong, and to some degree, he’s entitled to say what’s on his mind, and he wouldn’t be disrespectful. asking him about it would make him say: “no, i’m not interested in her, but she’s cool.”

🧁 MAKE A GIRL, FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING THAT’S SACRED, COMPETE WITH US FOR HIS AFFECTIONS. i really thought elisa or jo would’ve been that girl, and if we’re honest here, it’s not natural that a guy like bobby doesn’t have at least one more girl into him. gary has lottie, ibrahim has shannon, jo and priya, lucas/henrik have blake, noah has hope, priya and blake, why not give bobby someone?

🧁 fusebox didn’t need to make him a player to make him interesting, but the hell is that quiet ass route of his?!?! it makes him a “one playthrough” type of character, because after you go through the doubting phase, there’s nothing left to be excited about. we were, every week, praying he wouldn’t fuck us over. that thrill is what made us go back to the game on his route, every week. yes he’s adorable, but that’s... about it.

🧁 he comes out ready to go. he has no flaws or growth, and i think the idea of being a positive influence on your li’s journey is what makes everything interesting. lucas learning how to trust and being more in tune with his own value, henrik regretting blake, noah learning how to stand up and ending things with hope, ibrahim with everything in his route, pretty much, gary opening up about being and feeling like a weirdo. bobby’s back story was completely forgotten and that makes him someone flawless. i don’t like that.

🧁 bobby surrendering to every drama plot the villa has to offer is exhausting. yes, he loves his friends and wants everyone to get along, but most of the fights weren’t meant for him to take the lead. it’s not what makes him a great character, it’s what makes him a good friend. do you know why i stan some of the others? because when they see a fight they go “yeah, this drama seems pointless.” JUST LIKE THAT! bobby shouldn’t be worrying about it, because the more he pays attention to the fights, the less he focuses on mc.

🧁 judge bobby... that’s fine. it was funny, and very enlightening, but maybe adding a mystery about him would’ve been dope. something that wasn’t ibrahim’s purring, but something intriguing about cupcake boy would’ve been far superior if you ask me. because rahim was purring with trust, then switched faster than shannon could say “all in”.

🧁 i understand his friendship with noah, and i do get why he saved hope, but can we talk about how those friendships were fun and we didn’t get to see a glimpse of them?! the lip sync battles would’ve been so chef’s kiss!

🧁 not a single drop of jealousy in him. YEAH RIGHT. make it make it sense! the guy has some confidence issues but is not jealous?? seems legit! /s

🧁 it’s really good to have a character that’s drama-free, but the only reason for that is because he became so popular that if fusebox made him a player, their hq would’ve been burned to the ground by the stans. so maybe insert a new plot! maybe how slightly interested he would’ve been in another girl? just like they did to every other boy ?? it’s not about the suffering, it’s about the thrill.

🧁 bobby not having a true pair, besides mc, it’s not romantic, it’s pure bullshit. from “player” he was transformed into “route patch”. like ???

🧁 and finally: give me details of why he talked to the kitchen fam and not his family. he has a sister he barely mentions, and his parents are never talked about. why is that? give me more on that!

[for-ests]

Hey, not sure if you do smut but I think this request can work without a lot if you’d prefer😁 reader’s an art student and needs to sculpt a full body nude sculpture and Tom offers but gets a bit cheeky

thanks for the request dear! this was fun to write :-) i literally know nothing about art so if I get something wrong just ignore! i hope you enjoy!! i went a diff +route but I still think it fits! [ mlist ] 

Word count: 3, 273

Warnings: slight nsfw,, nudity 

Pairing: Tom Holland x art student reader!

“The issue is… I have no idea who to ask.” You sighed deeply, embarrassment washing over you as you talked to your best friends about your upcoming project. 

Everyone knew you were a talented sculptor. That wasn’t the issue. The issue was that your professional sculpting internship at (your school) was currently learning about Ancient Greece. One of the requirements to pass the semester was to recreate a modern sculpture of someone you knew, and to make it as realistic as possible. Nakedness and all, which was a huge distinction of Greek statues.

There was a big problem though. You were incredibly shy, and you didn’t know who to ask to model for you.

Nudging you with a laugh, your friend flashed you a mischievous smile. “You know a lot of cute guys, why don’t you ask one of them?”

“Cute guys?” You scrunched your nose. “I know like three guys and I would cry if I had to see them naked.”

She sighed. “Fair. Does it have to be a guy?”

*-You nodded regretfully. “It has to be the opposite sex. It’s annoying but I u

erstand why. It’s important to be familiar with both sexes.”

Your best friend air quoted ‘familiar’ with a ridiculous smirk.

“Shut up.” You huffed, trying not to laugh at how dramatic she had become.

“I think I know a guy, he’s an aspiring actor and model.” Your best friend added casually.

Groaning, you shot her a glare. “Why didn’t you say that right away?”

She shrugged. “I like listening to you talk about your art.”

Her compliment almost worked, but you already knew that was partly the reason she was teasing you so hard. The other reason was because she had been trying to set you up with multiple friends for months. According to her, you had been single for far too long.

Her offer made you ponder deeper about your situation. You were slightly awkward when it came to getting to know someone, but you couldn’t imagine asking someone to strip right away so you could sculpt every curve your eyes grazed over. Whoever it ended up being had to be incredibly confident. Shallow yes, but that’s why you were hoping to find someone insanely attractive. Attractive people were usually confident, and responsibly so. “Maybe a stranger would be worse than someone I know.”

Snorting through her nose, your best friend stared at you like you were crazy. “Definitely not. If it’s awkward you never have to see him again. And if it’s not, well you can get cozy with a cutie.”

Taking a deep breath, you rolled your eyes. “I hate you sometimes.” You mumbled under your breath. You knew she was right, but you would never inflate her already enormous ego like that.

“You love me.” She sang sweetly.

“I do, now give him my number and tell him it’s of the utmost importance.”

❀∙∘✿∘∙❀

Days later, that conversation was on your mind as you nervously organized your sculpting tools. Trying to relieve some tension, you slapped a pound of clay against the table, and it echoed throughout the workshop.

Reality was the fact that this so called model boy was on his way to your studio. His name was Tom, and from the pictures you saw–he was incredibly handsome.

You couldn’t believe you had agreed to this, but alas, you needed this experience to pass your class. You just hoped and prayed that Tom was a lot more outgoing than you, and could keep the conversation flowing as you stared intently as his erect… penis.

Your cheeks flared up at the thought. How the hell were you going to do this?

Y/N: help (Y/B/F/N) I cant do this!!! im freaking out

Y/B/F: is he even there yet? lmfao

Y/N: noooooo :((

Y/B/F: if it makes you feel any better, he’s excited and thinks ur pretty

Y/N: why didn’t you tell me that before??!

Y/B/F: do u feel better now tho?

Y/N: no

Y/B/F: ik ur smiling ;) u aint slick

Giggling like a schoolgirl to relieve some of your anxiety, you set your cell phone on the table. Truthfully, your best friend had made you feel better. If anything bad happened, it would surely be a wonderful story to tell everyone in the future.

Your eyes naturally glanced across the room to the clock on the wall. 7:00pm. Tom would be here any minute as scheduled.

You took a deep breath and studied your surroundings. All your tools were in place, and the entire studio was tidied up as if you hadn’t worked the space in weeks. Next, you walked to the wall and glanced at your reflection in the mirror.

With your hair in a bun and your shabby working clothes, you looked suitable at best. You did have a little bit of makeup on to help yourself feel more confident. If you felt good, you could make your client feel good in return.

At least it looked like you didn’t try too hard. You didn’t want this man to get the wrong idea.

Then, snapping you out of your trance, there was a knock on the door.

You straightened out your shirt one last time, and tucked your baby hairs back behind your ears. Scoffing immediately after, you shook your head. Why were you trying to look cute? Who cares!

You rushed to grab the front door, afraid that you were making him wait too long. You flung it open, eyes locking with his right away.

You froze.

He was even more dashing in person.

“Judging by your cute outfit, I think I’m at the right place. Y/N right?”

And a British accent?

“Y-yes!” You flashed a smile to mask your obvious hesitation. You could easily play it off by opening the door and keeping your gaze averted. You were the master of smoothness.

“Thank you for coming, it’s about time I got this project done…” You tittered, locking the door behind him for privacy purposes. “You can set your things on the couch over there.” You pointed, eyes meeting his again when he glanced to the couch and then back to you.

“Awesome.” He nodded, holding your gaze for a moment longer than necessary.

“Do you want anything to eat or drink?” You offered, nodding your head back to the small kitchen in the back of the studio. You wished the studio apartment was yours alone, but you shared it with multiple other college students in your program.

“Water… or beer if you have any?”

You threw your head back in laughter, causing Tom to smile at your genuine reaction.

“Yeah, I can get you one.”

“In the meantime, should I just strip?” He smirked, not trying to be sly with his flirtations. Though your cheeks were dusting with pink, you were able to match his energy. Your best friend definitely set you up with someone she knew you’d like.

“Do whatever you want, love.” You mimicked his British accent. “You’re the guest after all.”

Walking past him, you gave him one last look when he was fully-clothed. Tom was certainly the player type, practically the perfect embodiment of the muse you had in mind. This wouldn’t be awkward for you, and it would be even better for him. Men like him thrived off of cheeky discomfort in their female counterparts.

Yet, truthfully, you were enjoying it as well. It felt nice to be complimented so soon into an introduction.

As you cracked open a can of beer for Tom and yourself, you could hear him shuffling around with his items. The sound of his buckle falling against the floor made you suddenly nervous to turn around.

Inhaling sharply, and gulping down a few more sips of beer, you finally gained the courage to walk back to the studio setup, where Tom had already wandered over to, completely naked.

“You seem to be in your element.” You noted, trying to keep your eyes leveled with his. Now that you were thinking about it, remaining calm and professional was excruciating in front of such an attractive man. And it certainly wasn’t helping that he was enjoying your embarrassment.

And least this was exciting.

Thanking you, Tom took the beer and pressed his lips against the cold aluminum. “I would definitely feel a lot more comfortable if you were naked too, darling.”

“Hey now,” You nose scrunched in a form of mock distaste. The man caught on immediately, holding your gaze with a sort of amusement that was masking desire. “I might think about it if you sit nice and pretty for me for more than five minutes so I can sketch you.”

“Your wish is my command.”

Shaking your head in disbelief, you walked over to your crafting desk. You decided you were going to start with the hardest part, the part which your grade depended heavily on- from the waist down.

But first, you quickly sketched Tom posing in multiple poses until you were satisfied with one. You had him mimic a sculpture you couldn’t recall, where one hand was pointed forward and the other was rested casually on his hip.

“Can I see what one you want to do?” He asked curiously from the stand you had him propped up on for a better view.

“Sure.” You flashed him your finished sketch. The lines darted all over the page, making it hard for him to picture what was going on in your head. The picture you had drawn would not make sense to anyone else but the artist. But apparently you were talented, so he would trust the process.

You were also trusting the process. The situation you were in could only be awkward if you allowed it to be. And so far it was moving along smoothly. You had your favorite music playing softly in the background to fill the silence, and Tom seemed to be relaxed and unbothered by how quietly you worked.

“That’s cool.” Tom whispered, his eyes narrowing in confusion.

Giggling from his sudden proximity, you tried to tease him. “It’s fine to not understand it.”

“I definitely don’t know what’s going on but it’s still interesting.” He admitted.

You set the paper back down on the table, and decided to attempt and sculpt the base. Moving past a still naked Tom, you tried to immerse yourself in your work, or at least make it seem like you were focused. “This takes hours you know, weeks and months- it won’t make sense for a long time.”

“Perfect.” He grinned. “I’ll get plenty of time to know you better.”

Laughing through your nose, you kept your attention on the clay you had dropped on the floor. “You can put your clothes back on.”

“Oh!” He chuckled. “Yeah.”

As you carefully trimmed the base clay with a heavy frame, you lifted your head to find Tom slipping a robe back on. He definitely came prepared. Had he done this before?

“Come here.” You gestured. “I need you to set your feet down on the clay.”

“I didn’t think this would get dirty so fast.”

“Shut up.” You huffed, grabbing his foot and pressing it down hard until the clay took shape to the size.

“Cold.” Tom commented in discomfort.

“I know.” You released your grip on his calf, looking up at him with a sheepish smile. “All part of the process, but good news for you- you’re done for the night.”

“Really?” Tom raised his eyebrows. “That’s it?”

You nodded, standing back up to normal height. “I’m experienced enough to sculpt the feet and legs tonight.”

“When should I come back?” He sounded a tad too eager, but it caused your smile to reappear.

“Tomorrow night if you’re available.”

“And maybe next time you can bring your own alcohol?” You gestured to the multiple beer cans poking out of the recycling bin.

The man flashed you a smile. “Sounds like a date.”

“It’s definitely not.”

Despite your rejection to his amusing advances, Tom’s expressions and mannerisms remained hopeful. Was it possible he was truly enjoying himself?

“I’ll leave my robe here. I’ll see you tomorrow at the same time?”

“Same time.” You confirmed, nodding him off. It was about time you started to really focus. Attractive man or not, you always got the most and best work done alone.

Because after the first night, the dynamics between you and Tom changed. He became incredibly invested in your process, asking you questions left and right, asking if there was any way he could help, and practically just lounging next to you hours after he would have been free to go.

“What do your sculptures usually look like?”

“Since this isn’t my own studio, I don’t have any of my pieces here. But I can show you a picture when I get my hands wiped off.”

“What do you build your sculptures with? It’s hard to imagine that a replica of me can come out of that much clay.”

“My sculptures are built with water-based clay and are fired in a gas kiln to cone 4, about 2150 degrees Fahrenheit… “ You nodded towards the back wall that had an installed kiln for you and everyone to share. “Trust me, there will be a lot more clay. Hundreds of pounds worth.”

“Can I help?”

“No.”

There was no lying that you enjoyed his presence. Whether he was talking your ear off or napping to the peaceful beat of your jazz music, there was never a dull moment when Tom was in your studio.

Weeks passed, and so did the process. Your sculpture of Tom had progressed to week three, and that’s when you started to grow nervous. When you finished, which you were almost done, would you ever see him again?

You had barreled through the awkwardness of replicating his genitals and chiseling his six pack perfectly into the hardening clay- but you still felt like something was missing. You knew even when you finished chiseling away his jaw line and chocolate brown eyes, there would still be something missing. Him. His presence.

Maybe it would have been better if you partnered up with a man that had zero personality.

Since it was just you and Tom for hours on end, your conversations gradually grew deeper, they stretched into new lengths, so much so that you eventually felt like you had known him for years.

When Tom claimed he wasn’t looking for a relationship, you felt your heart fall. That’s when you realized you were developing stronger feelings for your model. You hardly had time to think about trivial things like that, but you couldn’t deny your disappointment.

And you were sure he saw the brief tears glossing over your eyes when you turned away. Yet, he didn’t make light of it.

That’s when you knew it was useless.

It seemed useless until the sixth week, when you finally finished the head. You were too afraid to attach it. Tom had spent the last couple hours with you in the studio. His legs kicked back and occasional whistles streaming from his lips. He had practically memorized your playlist to the extent you had.

“Tom.” You called. “Your face is done.”

He cheered excitedly, pushing himself off the sofa and racing towards you. Tom had learned to give you your space while you worked, but in moments where you summoned him, he barely stood inches from you. The man would constantly touch you in ways you couldn’t deny sent shivers down your spine.

Like he did as he rounded the tabletop, planting himself by your side and placing his hand on the low of your back. As if it was natural.

“Wow,” He breathed. “Y/N,” Your name upon his lips sounded as blissful as the music. “It’s.. it’s wonderful. It looks just like me... wow that’s scary.”

“I’m happy you like it.” You bit your lip, wishing you felt more satisfied with your project. You wanted to impress him, but you didn’t want him to go.

“All I have to do is attach the head, and fire it up in the furnace one more time. Then it should be good to go.”

You moved to do so, wanting to remove yourself from his grip. It hurt your heart to know the bond you had formed with him would come to an end. Why did you even let yourself get to this point? Was it because he was good at flirting?

“Wait-” His sentence faltered when you whipped around to face him- looking somewhat hopeful.

“What?”

Tom paused, his throat tightening with the words he never thought he would admit. But he couldn’t leave tonight with at least trying. He needed to know how you felt. Because he could either leave with you in his arms, or he could leave never having to see you again.

He had been thinking of confessing to you for days now, but now that the time came, his mind was blank. “You really are beautiful, you know that right?”

“Why do you feel the need to flatter me?” You blurted, still unable to decipher the truth behind his words. You didn’t know how to accept such a compliment. Tom had claimed you were beautiful before, but this time it felt different.

His eyes spoke volumes. The beauty his eyes held was something you would never be able to replicate in a statue. It was a sight you found yourself never growing sick of.

Averting your eyes, you tried to move again. Yet this time, Tom gripped onto both of your arms.

“Look at me.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“I won’t let you play me.”

“I was never playing you, darling.” The tenderheartedness intertwined with his words caused you to slowly turn your head back. Your lip quivered, and suddenly you felt like a schoolgirl all over again. You felt childish and unprepared for the intensity of your emotions.

“I don’t want to leave tonight without knowing if you feel the same.”

You blinked, hand reaching out to grip onto his. “And that is?” 

“I don’t know if it’s love, but it could be.” 

“That’s all I needed to hear.” You said, incredibly softly. 

Tom released your arms. And before either of you could process what to do next, your lips interlocked. 

You gripped onto him tightly, balling his white t shirt into a fist to keep him from leaving your side again. 

“Tom-” You breathed. 

The kiss you shared was laced with a fervent need, one that you had never experienced before, and one that you craved again and again. 

After the passion you felt, the skin prickling desire, there would be no turning back. 

“Fuck, you’re everything”’ He mumbled against your lips. 

You pulled back slightly to gaze at his expression. He had looked so afraid before, but now he was smiling from ear to ear. Much like he did the day he arrived with a teasing attitude, ready to get under your skin and provide entertainment. 

“How long have you felt like this?” 

“Since the first day.” He kissed you again, his hands cupping your cheeks. 

You whimpered against his muscular frame, trying to ignore the fluttering in your core, fluttering that begged and craved for more. 

“How did you wait so long?” 

“I wanted you to finish.” 

You chuckled, cheesing at his straightforward, simple reply. 

You were positive from that moment moving on, that Tom was not what you had thought at first glance. This entire time he had put you and your project first, letting his own desires sit and warm on the back-burner. That was something you would hold close to your heart, something you would cherish. 

He cared for you in the same way you cared for him. 

“Stay with me tonight, Tom.” 

“I would love nothing more.” 

[noddytheornithopod]

Okay, now that I’ve gotten all the Bad Batch controversies out of the way... I can finally talk about the actual damn episode properly.

Like I said on my whitewashing post, overall I liked it, but I am kinda hesitant for reasons I explained there. I now want to focus on the actual story itself on its terms, and see how I feel about that. Apologies if I jump all over the place.

Probably my biggest issue narrative wise was that I felt some of the stuff around Crosshair was a bit contrived. Like, I was fine with him going full GOOD SOLDIERS FOLLOW ORDERS and all that, my issue is that I feel like the others took a while to realise he was following Order 66. Like, Tech even says he can’t be certain their mutations entirely screwed up their programming, with the camera even cutting to Crosshair. And like, before that Crosshair is berating Hunter for letting Caleb escape. When Tech said what he did, I feel like Hunter should’ve probably said something like “that must be why Crosshair tried to kill the Jedi”. Granted, it probably would’ve then led to questions like why Crosshair’s genetics let his chip work and not the others (something that isn’t answered, but it’s not something I felt that needed to, different genetics affect things in different ways we can’t always predict), but like, when they’re on Onderon and Crosshair’s like “yeah let’s shoot literal child refugees”, I feel like they shouldn’t have just conflicted with him, they should’ve outright wondered if he was falling for his programming. It doesn’t break the episode for me and I guess they probably just assumed Crosshair was being his usual dickish self, but I guess that also is a reminder that this is the second time we’ve seen him, so we don’t know if he’d normally be up for killing innocents if a mission requires it (since TBB are still given missions, their thing is they just do them the wrong way). It’s just like, you’d think at least Tech would make some comment about it. As Saw said, he’s supposed to be the smart one lol.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, I was surprised that Crosshair’s was only partly working. I guess it’s because he still had a level of personality to him? The more you know, I guess.

I do think the Bad Batch work better here as many have said, I guess probably because they’re the focus of the story so they have more room to show who they are and nuances to that. My favourite is probably Tech, I tend to gravitate to the nerd characters in things. Shame he has to look so fucking white for being a clone of a brown man though. :/ Kinda like Wrecker too, even with the issues HE has too. Great, even in my main comments my issues with them are popping up. :v

On that note... I do appreciate the idea behind the Bad Batch, being clones who turned out different and it’s about accepting and embracing your differences. It’s just in execution, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. Like, it could be a commentary on things like ableism, but thing is, these characters are basically superpowered (if people weren’t fixated on bashing women they don’t like and were equal in their vitriol, you could EASILY call the Bad Batch a bunch of Gary Stus). It’s one of those things where a sci-fi/fantasy allegory is well intentioned but because of things that don’t apply to our reality, the allegory kinda falls apart. Like yes, “be nice to people different to you” is one thing, but it does lowkey feel a bit like “they’re judged because they’re better than everyone else, those stinkin regs are just jealous”. Well no jealousy is shown in the episode, in fact a normal clone calls them defects... which is weird because even if yes TECHNICALLY they are, they’re basically presented as turning out different, but those differences are things that are beneficial to them, and not impairments. I guess I feel like the message would be stronger if they actually had major weaknesses, aka why they’re “defective”, but their strengths are something they excel at so much they’re allowed to serve (which I GUESS was the idea, but we don’t know what made them defective originally and what got their mutations enhanced). And yes, you can infer things like Wrecker being “dumb” (which has its own issues, and even then he’s still competent enough on a battlefield, honestly he might even be more just impatient and impulsive and thus can’t sit still to learn more complex things), but yeah. It’s kind of a mixed message here, I appreciate what they’re going for, but like many fictional allegories, it kinda falls apart and it’s also presented in a very individualistic way.

Okay let me say something positive: AZI-3 IS BACK! I assume he got memory wiped so he wouldn’t have any memory of Fives, but I really liked him in the Order 66 arc of The Clone Wars so I was happy to see him again. Well, until he was hit with that stun blast. I hope he’s okay and able to be repaired!

Echo’s attack with his probe arm thing is pretty cool. It was also cool seeing how he was integrating into the Bad Batch. I also theorised he was most likely to be immune to the inhibitor chip out of the group, because while I felt the Kaminoans wouldn’t overlook inhibitor chips in even mutated clones (they do explain that they kept them around because they were always successful at what they do despite their unorthodox tactics), I had a feeling that the Techno Union putting all those cybernetics in his head maybe screwed with or even removed the chips. Get the poor guy some skin colour though.

I have also seen some people bring up the potential issue of ableism with Echo given he’s an amputee with prosthetics, but I don’t have much to comment on in that regard. But yeah, using disabled bodies for shock value and it being seen as a measure of humanity like in The Bad Batch arc of TCW is a trope I could really do without.

I’m liking Omega so far. She’s definitely got a different vibe to other kid characters we’ve gotten in these shows, probably because she was raised on Kamino. Also appreciate that her voice actor is New Zealander too (she’s not Maori which would’ve been the ideal, but was born to Indonesian Chinese parents). Her curiosity makes a lot of sense, she’s not just mischievous because kid. Was nice to see Hunter open up to her too.

I’m intrigued to see where they take Crosshair. IDK why his genetics allowed his chip to still work, but it’s nice to see at least one of the Bad Batch follow Order 66. I guess they decided against it for more (as much as I’d liked to have seen it) because Order 66 doesn’t just make clones decide to kill Jedi, it basically removes any level of humanity and personality they may have developed and makes them basically stormtroopers. That, and well they want our heroes of the show to be the Bad Batch, and that can’t work if they’re now the goody two shoes batch.

On the topic of Crosshair, my favourite scene in the episode was actually when Omega talks to him. She tries to empathise with him, and whether she’s just naturally intuitive or is Force sensitive in some way, she can tell that Crosshair despite everything seems to be struggling, and it’s ultimately beyond his control that he’s like this now. And then he’s off to get his chip working at full capacity and is now a full on Imperial, RIP.

Also yeah, I’m on team “Omega is Force sensitive”. It’s possible she just has some heightened abilities because she’s an enhanced clone, but the way they framed her firing the blaster especially just screamed Force sensitivity to me.

On the topic of inhibitor chips, Crosshair proves that it’s possible to make them stronger, so it does potentially mean that if members of the Bad Batch are captured, their chips could be dialed up to make them loyal Imperials. I guess one could also wonder if they could be slow for the effects to come into play for some of them, so some maybe slowly turn later on? I doubt they will go that route because they probably want to keep all our heroes around, but it’s something, especially if they eventually conclude they have to remove their chips to be safe.

Seeing Saw in the first episode was surprising but also pretty cool, especially with how the model is transitioning from his Clone Wars appearance into Forrest Whittaker. Love how he sees right through Palpatine’s bullshit, especially when he makes that jab at Tech that seems to be a bit of a blow to his ego, lol. Some have wondered why he’s so chill here, but you have to remember this is early days Saw. He’s still cautious, but he’s not paranoid and overly violent. The way some of those refugees reacted to the clones does make it seem like there’s already Imperial forces occupying Onderon (well, they’re literally out in the forest at a camp). Mainly bring that up because I have to wonder how much time has passed, and how quickly Imperial forces showed up to Onderon.

Seeing Tarkin be a dick is always glorious. He just goes everywhere and KNOWS he’s in charge, lol. It was also interesting how even if he’s feeling like he’s ready to abandon clone forces, he sees potential with Clone Force 99 if they can follow Imperial doctrine.

The Kaminoans also seem distrustful of the Empire, not because they’re against it but because they want to keep their current deal. Maybe if Tarkin heard them out the Empire would have a better army, lol. Taun We from AOTC even cameoes. I do wonder what’s eventually going to happen though, given the clones are obviously abandoned in the end, I wonder how the Kaminoans are going to take it.

Also, Nala Se is back. Yeah, THAT Nala Se. Wonder what she’s doing with Omega as her medical assistant, lol. Oh yeah, she also stopped the doors and let the Bad Batch escape. I have no idea what she’s planning, but I feel like she’s being shady, given not only the Fives stuff but also because despite having a fondness for Omega she does seem like she’s very controlling of her (after all, she’s just property to her), hence why Omega wants to get out and be with the Bad Batch.

Okay, I think that’s everything I wanted to say? But yeah, have a lot of reservations, but still curious to see where this goes despite that.

[2ofswords]

Since I am so tired of reading „I know Dankovsky sucks and his ending is horrible“, before every comment that defends him, I will now throw myself into the fires of discourse and write an essay about:

Why The P1 Utopian ending does not mean Danko is an asshole

(A bit of swearing and a lot of spoilers under the cut)

Since I already spoke about being tired of disclaiming a lot, here are some of them. Firstly: This is NOT a comparison and I am definitely not saying, that his ending is better than the ending of the Haruspex or the Changeling. That would be ridiculous and I wholeheartedly belief that the other characters have morally better endings. (Though I will make one ending comparison at the end of this essay just to make myself even more of a hypocrite and there will be a comparison of one aspect of all three P1 endings, that is not made to compare their general quality but… well… this specific aspect of the ending.)

Also this essay isn‘t about Dankovsky not being an asshole. This is not a character analysis, I am only talking about the ending and his relationship regarding his path towards it. There are entirely different arguments to be made about his character that I will not talk about. Surprisingly a character is not only defined by the outcome of their story.

And last but not least the weirdest disclaimer of them all: While my arguments try to defend Dankovsky in his ending I totally understand if you still think his ending makes him more of an asshole. Killing a lot of people is always a dick move and the decision is still a horrible one. I do not really want to argue that people are wrong for judging him based of his ending. I just want to explain, why we also do not have to feel ashamed for deciding to not judge him as a complete asshole based on the main outcome of his route and why his motivation isn’t only based on spite or even ruthless calculation. Also, I think that there is a lot to say about his decision, that isn’t really said and that these are interesting aspects. Sorry to say it, but I just wanted to have a catchy title. I just really love this ending and it’s complexity and wanted to discuss it aside of calling it the evil Danko ending.

So. Let’s start with the easy argument that some people are talking about.

Argument 1: Danko completely lost it and holding him accountable due to his rationality defies the point of his route.

This one is… one of the weaker arguments, but I will still elaborate on it. The entirety of his route is built upon loss and failure. While the Haruspex starts with a mob that wants to kill him and works his way up, the dynamic of his route is him seemingly starting on top of everything and slowly loosing his bearings and by the end of the story this man is already driven to madness. Being used as a pawn in politics, getting daily “fuck you”-letters from the Powers that Be, realizing your lives work is already destroyed and all of your colleagues are probably as doomed (and being the one responsible because he was their leader), realizing that Aglaya – who was the one person who seemed to be his ally at the end – used and betrayed him just like everyone else, having the one truly honestly kind person commit suicide at least partly because of his failures, witnessing his own helplessness against the plague (an enemy that should align with his expertise as a doctor), being hated from day one by almost everybody in town, realizing that the political allies are totally bonkers and also preparing to off themselves (Victor! You seemed moderately sane at the beginning. The betrayal!), getting almost beaten to death while trying to help the town while spending all these days in an hostile place that slips into chaos… yeah I think you really aren’t in the headspace for rational thought. It is a miracle that that guy hasn’t completely broken down and day eleven and to some extend day 9 and 10 are showing him as completely unhinged already, only leading up to a decision, that isn’t really made out of spite or coldness but rather desperation and blind tunnel vision. The day eleven mission involves him going on a rampage against a military squad because of a vague hint and he only checks after the killings, if Andrew is even there. That isn’t a calculated action it’s about a man being completely shattered and making everybody suffer because of that. (Which is also horrible, but an entirely different sort of tragedy.) By now he just shouldn’t be the one handling the situation at all but the local powers sure want to wash their hand of any guilt that they haven’t already attracted. Also – and more importantly – the Polyhedron literally is the one good thing happening to this man. After going into it on day 9 he thanks Khan for reminding him of a childhood he has forgotten! He has a shit week, he is completely beaten down (quite literally) and this is the one happy moment he finds in all this chaos. Clinging onto that is surely not rational, but it is human. We all know that the Bachelor has the tendency to survive on willpower alone and here clinging to the tower and its miracles is literally his only motivation to continue his route at all. Of course he is going to protect it at that point, if thinking about any other option bring nothing but utter misery and the acceptance of complete and utter failure. After all Dankovskys route is about the limits of his rational worldview and how it hinders him more that it serves him in a world, that isn’t defined by rational beliefs. Of course he will be out of it by the end and actually loosing his composure is an important part of his suffering and character development in the story. His ending is not a sign of rational thought but the last consequence of being enraptured in a web of circumstances that forbid him from making rational decisions in the first place.

Truth to be told, I don’t really like this as an argument. I love this thought as a peace of characterization. As much as I love his ending and the horrible consequences and the actual failure it imposes, when we look at the other playable characters. But it doesn’t really help us here. It doesn’t change the fact, that Dankovsky destroyed an entire town just for a dream, a man-made building, a promise of utopia that we never witness ourselves. He still destroyed so… so much! But… let’s look a bit deeper into the motivations behind that exchange.

Argument 2: The Trolley problem

“There is a runaway trolley barrelling down the railway tracks. Ahead, on the tracks, there are five people tied up and unable to move. The trolley is headed straight for them. You are standing some distance off in the train yard, next to a lever. If you pull this lever, the trolley will switch to a different set of tracks. However, you notice that there is one person on the side track. You have two options:

Do nothing and allow the trolley to kill the five people on the main track. Pull the lever, diverting the trolley onto the side track where it will kill one person. Which is the more ethical option? Or, more simply: What is the right thing to do?” (Wikipedia)

There is a variation to this question and interestingly enough it is one of the morality questions Aglaya asks in Pathologic 2: Would you push a man down a bridge, to save the children from a train? The curious thing is, that we can see all healers giving the same answer, (even if we have the choice to choose differently, since it is… you know… a dilemma). Necessary sacrifice is a constant of all three routes and every single protagonist has to kill in order to save a larger amount of people. Still, the game never answers moral choices with a simple answer and here with the Utopian ending we can see the darker side of this moral dilemma in full force (to a lesser extend this also applies to the Humble ending, since it also involves the Trolley problem, albeit on a smaller scale.) If we take the Kain’s studies about the focus and the soul seriously and see the Polyhedron as a method to ensure immortality seriously – or if we at least assume that Dankovsky wholeheartedly believes in that concept – than protecting the Polyhedron at the cost of the town suddenly becomes the Trolley problem at a significantly larger scale. The Polyhedron could ensure the survival of humankind but only at the expense of the town and it’s infected inhabitants. After all death is to Dankovsky but an affliction that can be healed just like the plague and consumes far more victims (if not all of them even if one would survive the disease). And that poses the question: When does the Trolley Dilemma stop working? What if there are two million people on the tracks and one million on the other side? What if there are hundred people on one and ninety nine on the other? What about five million vs. four million and nine hundred thousand? Can a human life be counted against the life of several others? If we look at the game itself and the healers answer in their daily life, it seems kind of simple: Yes, it is possible. The effort of saving is worth dirtying your hands after all. Risking at least your own life seems like a fair deal and no route really works without at least some degree of human sacrifice. But on this larger scale… it seems absurd. And… well… it is. But still. If we just try to empathise with the Bachelors mindset. If there is a possibility to cure humanity’s mortality… if there is a sliver of possibility (and since Thanatica is destroyed the Polyhedron seems like the only possibility at this point)… what kind of sacrifice is worth preserving it?

I myself have my own answer to that question. In Germany the Constitution starts with the sentence “Die Würde des Menschen ist unantastbar” or: “Human dignity shall be inviolable.” (This is the official translation though a more direct translation would be “Human dignity is inviolable” which is more of a statement and less of a law) Even if the effect of that sentence in politics is very debatable and it is incredibly vague and not really a usable sentence as a law… I really like it. The human rights as a concept as well as equality can be concluded from the fact, that human dignity is something that cannot – under any circumstance – been taken away and is always a thing that must be considered just by being human. It is… nice. And it also means, that a human being cannot be seen as a mere object and has its own agency. A human being is not quantifiable in their existence by any parameter, be it birth, skin colour, gender, sexuality, religion, interests, talent, job, body, etc… It is incredibly important… and incredibly interesting in our scenario. Because if life isn’t quantifiable at any circumstance… the Trolley Dilemma has a solution. There is no way to tell, if one life can outweigh several others and deciding over their lives is something and judge over the worth of their live is something one should never do. Thus Dankovsky’s choice to save the Polyhedron and outweigh the lives of the infected seems morally wrong.

But… is that the answer the game has? Well… the artbook of Pathologic 2 states that the design of the game is about enforcing ambiguity and I would argue that the first instalment is no different. Firstly: In times of crisis lives become quantifiable. That is part of the tragedy. The healers’ lives are suddenly worth preserving, while others appear as nameless numbers in a daily statistic and caring about the individual dignity seems impossible. As already said the act of killing in order to preserve life is almost mandatory in every single run. So, what about human dignity? Can it even be preserved under such a dilemma? (And there is probably a point to be made about everybody being dolls and thus not even a being with dignity and agency at all… but I digress) Especially doctors have to face this dilemma and they have to make these judgement calls, weather they like it or not. The game doesn’t answer it but makes different variations of the same dilemma that we may judge differently. The Utopian ending is one variation.

What I want to say is, that – if we take the Kains’ believes seriously and see the survival of miracles against the law of nature not only as progress but as a question about human mortality itself – the question if the Polyhedron is worth saving is a very different one. I personally think that the idea of the focus still feels too esoteric to be a real point of interest but on the other hand… it is not like we haven’t some proof when we visit Khan and listen to his testimony. It is not that this place is above it’s miracles, and we know that a lot of the mysticism is grounded in reality, be it by the very real ways of the Kin or the past existence of Simon. So only thinking of the polyhedron as an abstract concept is… well doing it a disservice if we take the other parts as serious. Yeah it is made out of it’s own idea but… you know being like “it cannot exist but it can sure puncture the earth and kill everything” is… a weird way of thinking and it sure is a McGuffin (and even called that in the Artbook) but as we said, the game is about ambiguity and the only way to look at its existence is not only “evil tower of doom”. Is it worth keeping? Eh… I wouldn’t say so myself. I still think the Utopian ending is pretty shit and seeing the tower as salvation for our mortal lives is pretty farfetched. But the question for this essay is: Is it wrong to think, it is worth keeping? And from Dankovsky’s perspective, who sees it as the only possible chance of curing human mortality… Well… the answer at least isn’t as simple anymore. But – and now we are getting somewhere – the argument about the complexity of human value can be also made without even relying on Kain-Bullshit.

Argument 3: The Utopian Ending is the only ending, that completely gets rid of the plague (at least from Dankos point of view)

But wait you say, the other endings also defeat the plague! There even is a cure, something our beloved Bachelor of Medicine never archives. What is this lunacy?

Well here is the catch: A cure does not destroy its disease. Or at least it is an unreliable method. Sure, if everyone is cured and/or the disease helps to build antibodies, then it does help to get rid of it. But the sandpest seems to leave the bodies and not finding these remnants and antibodies is one essential part of the Bachelor’s route. It is the reason Rubin needs a living heart in the first place. The disease doesn’t seem to stay and no antibodies seem to be developed. (And even if I try to avoid material of Pathologic 2 in this analysis since there are differences in the Canon I still at least want to mention, that the Panacea as well as the shmowder do indeed not help against the disease after it is cured and a person can be reinfected. I do not know, if the same is the case in one and if you can test it out.) But if there are no antibodies, the cure could only eradicate the disease if every single infected person is cured at the same time. Good luck with that! That’s not bound to be a complete mess in this town!

This is backed up on day 12 in the Bachelor’s own route. When he is presented with the options the other healers have, he always asks both of them the same question: How does that ensure the future of the town? The Haruspex makes a cure yes. But what if the disease returns? After all the underground water he talks about still exists and there is no telling, if it will ever reemerge. It already happened once… The Haruspex doesn’t answer with “no, that will never happen”. He says that they will have enough cure if this is the case. An optimist, I see. And definitely not a satisfying answer if we consider a scientific perspective. What if the cure runs out? What if they find out too late and the plague spreads outside of town? A cure is not a waterproof system against plague. (You know what works better though? A vaccine.) Daniil’s mission was always to eradicate the disease and this would not do the trick. Having only a cure is risky. And it might not be a permanent solution.

The same applies for the Humble ending. If one asks the Changeling what would happen if the blood of their sacrifice runs out she answers “There will always be people willing to sacrifice themselves” Which is… just great. Constant human sacrifice just doesn’t seem that sustainable. And it also means that there will be constant loss of human life. Something that might even lead to more sacrifice in the long run (although that would be a reaaaaly long run considering how long the sacrifice of the Clara’s bound is supposed to last.) But it sure as hell doesn’t make the plague disappear. What if there are no willing sacrifices? What if Clara is gone and there is no one to perform a miracle? Clara’s ending relies on faith by nature and putting your trust in it is easy from a player’s perspective but even harder when there are lives at stake, the success unsure and these questions to consider.

Dankovsky’s ending is built upon uprooting the plague and eradicating it. The problem is that it is everywhere and not easily destroyed. As Lara very adequately realised: There is no source. His ending is the consequence of that goal and even if it loses in every other aspect, this is the one, where it wins. It actually destroys the problem itself. Building a new town and keeping the tower it cannot reach, actively minimalizes the possibility of the plague reappearing. And a more permanent solution might save more lives than one that sounds more humane at the beginning.

Okay, to defend the Haruspex for a change of pace: In his route he actually does believe that his method eradicates the disease as much as Dankovsky is convinced that his solution does the trick. For him the source is the Polyhedron and the way, it wounds the earth. With it removed the plague will not reappear. But why should Dankovsky share this belief? No one tells him! The inquisitor says that the Polyhedron is the root of evil but there never is any actual proof for that. Even If the Polyhedron is partially responsible and Danko actually does acknowledge this, it is the bloody mess of underground fluids that are in fact the source (which is ironically confirmed by the Haruspex himself). As he tells the inquisitor herself at the last day: The source and the cause can be too different things. It already seeped through Andrey’s spiral to the upper layers. The damage has already been done and in fact the Polyhedron is now the only save place, where nobody is infected. Everything else needs to be destroyed to eradicate the disease but why even destroy the Polyhedron? Wait. Why even destroy the Polyhedron? What good would that even do if we would consider it? What the fuck would Dankovsky even do with the destroyed Polyhedron, how would that save the town?

Argument 4: Dankos ending isn’t about the town vs. the polyhedron at all!(From his perspective. It totally is for the player though!)

I experienced something weird while playing the Bachelor’s route in P1. And with that I mean that I experienced something weird, that I wasn’t already expecting. After hearing so much about the fabled Polyhedron love, assuming that he sacrifices the whole town for its sake and hearing from the inquisitor in Pathologic 2 again and again how obsessed he is, I waited for the revelation. The moment Dankovsky would completely lose it and become utterly and undeniably obsessed with the children’s tower. That moment… never happened. Or well… it happened remarkably late and with less impact than I thought. Until day 9 the tower isn’t even a point of interest to the Bachelor, which is two thirds of his route. But even after you witness the miracles of the Polyhedron yourself, you still can argue against its glory. You can agree with Aglaya on day 10, that it seems dangerous (even if that could also be tactics, but until this point there is not really a reason for that). Hell, you can tell Peter on day 12, that his ideas will always only exist in his mind and blueprints and that the new town they will create will not work out! That is so weird, if the result of his run is, that he sacrifices the town for the Polyhedron! Why is there always an option to speak against the miracle we want to save? Isn’t that completely strange?

If we take the town vs. polyhedron conflict serious then… yeah it is. But is this all, what his end can be about? I would argue against it. Because what finally tips him to his solution and completes his view on the map of the town isn’t the Polyhedrons glory: It is the towns underground water and the Haruspex telling him, that the deeper layers are infected. That is, when he flips his shit and he even has an “oh no, it can’t be!” moment. Weird, isn’t it? If he would be set about destroying the town, why agonizing over this information? But from his point of view it is a nail in the coffin, the realization, that the whole towns ground is seeping with infection and if not eradicated, it will reappear. The Bachelor doesn’t have a cure and the Haruspex, while promising that he has a solution, sure as hell doesn’t explain how that would work and insists on arguing his own case without interference. (Which is completely understandable but doesn’t clear the situation.) The Bachelor has no means on his own to fight the plague outside of destroying the town. This is his only option to call of the bombardment of the Polyhedron and the tower and from his point of view, destroying the tower would archive absolutely nothing. It is free of infection, why destroy it? What would ripping it out do aside from letting even more blood seep out? In his own case, this would be completely useless, thus destroying the Polyhedron does not save the town! When the Bachelor flips the switch and guides the trolley in a different direction, he isn’t guiding it from hitting the Polyhedron to hitting the town. He guides the trolley from hitting the town and the polyhedron to only hitting the town! And by the way to only hit the town which his infected people while everybody else evacuates in the tower. (Which is confirmed by his ending cutscene, where people are actually present. After all it takes the healthy to built the new town). In his own mind, the Bachelor is saving people, not killing them! He does what he can so that the most of them survives and in his case, destroying the town is the only method to ensure victory at all.

If we stick to his own route – as I am doing right now – we have two counterarguments against this theory. The first one: But isn’t that only the failure of finding a better method? And: yes it is. As we already discussed in the first argument, the Bachelors story is about failure and the game itself is about necessary sacrifice, lose-lose situations and making the best out of a desperate hopeless scenario. Which leaves us with the question: Could Dankovsky have found a better solution? And… maybe. If he was more attentive, made different choices, would have been nicer to the Kin… There always are “ifs” but I would argue that the ones in this scenario are… pretty small odds for a change. He does genuinely try to inspect the abattoir and find a solution and ensure it’s safety and is almost punched to death as a result. The Kin regard him with absolute hostility, and for a good reason but it doesn’t help his case. Without Burakh’s knowledge and caste-rights making a cure would be (almost) impossible. He isn’t allowed to do any normal doctoring the one time, he tried to gain some blood from dead people, multiple guards had to die in order to ensure this absolute act of evil to go unnoticed. Thus he has to rely on Rubin’s secret lab. The possibility of Simon and his powers against the plague also aren’t usable… The Bachelor doesn’t even get to see his corpse after all. What choice does he have other than eradicating the cause itself? It’s definitely not the elegant solution that he was hoping for but there is a reason for him switching to inspect everything after ruling out a living plague carrier. These are the desperate means of finding a solution when his own knowledge of medicine has already failed him and the hopes of providing such medicine are already dwindling. Saving the town is simply not an option, the moment itself becomes the source of the plague.

The second counterargument is this one: Why not side with another healer, when they provide a better solution? And this is also a very valid argument. And thus, the moment it becomes an option, we as the Bachelor can choose to do so. If he has the cures that are necessary to ensure another healers victory, it is completely possible to avoid that ending. He doesn’t have to stick with it as well as the other healers do not have to, so judging him based on the other routes being better outcomes becomes obsolete. He has the ability to use these options, but if we lack the cures, his own solution is the only one. (Of course you can also save the other characters bound and then still decide to destroy the town, but using this scenario as his only motivation, when you can totally decide for yourself is a bit harsh, isn’t it?)

Of course, this argument collapses the moment we play any other route and he is trying to convince us to save the Polyhedron and abandon our own plans. However his own route can be considered his own perception of the story and our knowledge, how much he knows about the others paths is pretty limited and dependant of our choices as the player. Also, seeing his character and the changes made with that in mind, we can actually explain, why they appear. Of course, everybody tells Artemy how much the Bachelor is in love with the tower, when we’re not seeing it to that extreme in his route! It is necessary to fulfil his role in the Haruspex route. Of course, both the Bachelor and the Haruspex will appear as demons in Clara’s route. They do offer nothing but destruction from her point of view and both solutions seem destructive and spiteful, if they try to convince her. Everybody seems on board with seeing the characters in her route differently, but I think that the same applies to the Bachelor and the Haruspex in each other’s route, since their roles in the game changes. Or at least the perspective changes based on the others worldview. The Haruspex seems a lot more dangerous and his medicine a whole lot shadier, while the Bachelor seems to be more in love with the tower and ready to abandon everything for it, because it seems that way in comparison to the other persons knowledge of the situation. This is also backed up by the doll ending, where the Bachelor is being called out as the villain most of the time. In other routes he appears more villainous than in his own route, because we do actually have the means of comparison. But this is our perspective and not actual character motivation. We as the player do have the choice to work toward an ending. We can with our knowledge of the game go the extra mile to secure enough cures from the very beginning and help another healer. We are aware of the fact, that Clara and Artemy are other playable characters and we know from the very beginning that their beliefs have to be of value and their solutions will be backed up by their own routes. We know the opposition these characters stand in and while we see the different routes we may judge them for ourselves. And while Clara definitely knows and the other two healers show some sensibility towards this opposition (the “left hand, right hand”-quote comes to mind), at least the male healers are basing their decision upon their beliefs and not some outside point of view (while Clara watches and not-so-silently judges them). They even try to help each other and even provide the key insight to their own plan’s destruction (the Bachelor guides the inquisitor eyes to the Polyhedron and its structure, while Artemy outright tells Daniil of the underground infection). Of course they do not have the full picture! How could they, this entire game is about them not having it and making terrible mistakes! Dankovsky doesn’t have the ability to judge his own solution how the player does. And while judging his ending based on this information is completely valid and sensible, implying that he knows this detriment and still goes through with everything feels… a bit unfair to say the least. The conflict of the town vs. the polyhedron is an important debate in the game. And yes, Dankovsky’s role is being the advocate of the polyhedron, but man, this guy has the tendency to get manipulated into advocating random shit! The town vs. polyhedron debate is as present with him, as it is with the Haruspex. With the Polyhedron being the source in his route, he really has no choice but to remove it. After all, this guy really has no reason, to protect the Polyhedron. Of course he doesn’t! He would never sacrifice the town for the sake of his own ideology!

Argument 5: Let’s talk Nocturnal!

I promised one comparison, didn’t I? Still, we are now diving into abstract talk about the games’ themes and less about character motivation. Consider this more of a bonus and a different thought and less as an argument for Dankovsky himself. Comparing one ending to a different one does not make one of these characters more or less of an asshole. And comparing Pathologic 1 to Pathologic 2 obviously doesn’t tell us anything about the canon of either of those games, since they have vastly different results and we have no idea what the Bachelor’s endings will look like in Parhologic 2 (though I would be surprised if we couldn’t destroy the town and save the Polyhedron. But who knows, in Artemy’s case the army only pisses off.) Still, I think it is very interesting to talk about both of these endings side by side.

And I will begin this comparison by telling you that I love this ending! I am so happy that it exists and I think it is glorious and I think it’s existence is really important. I am so happy that Artemy has a reason to destroy the town. But is this okay? Or – as a comparison – is this a better idea than the one Dankovsky had?

I would argue that these endings have a lot in common. They both preserve their own ideals and establish a radically new order at the cost of the town itself. They both kill a shit ton of people for the miracles they have witnessed along the way. One could even argue that the Nocturnal ending is more horrifying. Firstly, more people die. While the Bachelor saves the uninfected, Artemy saves only those who “live with earths will” which seems to be like… the ten guys chilling in the abattoir and some of the kids. We know that there are only mere hundreds of people left of the kin and since everybody in the termitary doesn’t seem to count… who even gets saved? It’s at least as vague as the question who isn’t infected and can be saved at the Utopian end. But – more importantly – Artemy definitely has a choice in that matter and decides to sacrifice the town for the sake of the past. (If you’re not me. In my playthrough I got the courier note twenty minutes before 22:00 and the game was like “what are you going to do, such a hard choice” and I was like “I literally do not have the time to get this thing to town hall”. And then Aspity was like “you made your own conscious and completely willed decision” while Artemy just awkwardly stared at her…) But even disregarding that, the ending is surprisingly similar. Yet I see no one judging either the Haruspex or his ending for being overly cruel and well… killing a lot. Actually, I only read posts defending it and saying that it is as morally okay as the diurnal ending and could also count as a good end. And… I kind of agree. The sacrifice of the diurnal ending is pretty steep and destroying some species – while the worms, herb brides and albinos definitely show human qualities – is pretty fucked up as well and preserving them can seem worth the cost. (Oh my, do not say we arrived at the problem of human value again!) Still… It is destroying the town for its miracles. That is literally what this ending is about, yet our asshole sense does not tingle at all! Why is that?

I think there are two arguments for this difference between our outlook on the Nocturnal and the Utopian end. The first one is that the Kin and its culture is very endangered and protecting it just seems more morally sound than protecting some rich dudes. Which is very fair and the Kains are very fucked up. Buuuut, it isn’t like there is the termitary quest that preludes the diurnal ending. Finishing the game doesn’t exactly mean that we abandon the Kin. Part of its beliefs and culture, yes. Definitely, and as I said I still think the Diurnal and Nocturnal ending are pretty balanced. But a part of the Kin is assimilated and is coping and while protecting its culture and very real traditions is completely valid, the Nocturnal ending also destroys parts of the Kin (the Termitary part) as ill fitting for living with the earth…. So… hm… It’s not as easy as saying “but you help the Kin in one and some rich dudes in the other”, since the Kin itself are also torn and we are still only allowing a specific way of living. A specific worldview containing the miracles of the town… On the other hand, the polyhedron and its miracles can also be considered endangered and unique. It is a one of a kind structure as is the miracles it can provide. The Stamatins are pretty unable to reproduce it, as the game likes to tell us and destroying it would destroy all hopes of a one in a time event to come to life. Also there are talks about the Utopians being a faction of the entire town with one third of the population agreeing on their beliefs (as it is the case with the other ideologies). And the plans Peter and Maria make do sound interesting, dreamlike and… well unique. Something that can also only happen in this circumstance. But alas… we do not know that much about it and their word is only what we have. And this is the second aspect that makes the Nocturnal ending more relatable: Buildup. We witness first-hand what this Nocturnal world would be (sometimes for better and sometimes for worse), we know the beings and the miracles of the earth. We do not really get in touch which the utopian ideas and only have the rambling of good old Georgji which… yeah that doesn’t help their case! But there are kids calling this new town an “eternal adventure” a miracle that can come to live and I would say, that this thought is quite beautiful. And it certainly is unique, which is the main argument of the Nocturnal ending. Wonders, plague and miracles. Destroy one and the other will vanish. So… what is worth keeping a miracle? The answer now seems even harder to grasp. Maybe even impossible.

But we also do not have every puzzle peace. I still have hope for the two different routes and with them there are the possibilities of new realizations and also new endings. I myself am really curious if we either get an option to save the town or a reason to destroy the Polyhedron as the Bachelor. (And I am very curious as well, if Clara will get a second ending. What would that even be? An all destruction ending to set everyone free???) There also could be more elaboration on the Polyhedron and its inner workings. Maybe we will even understand what the Kains are talking about! There are some allusions to a more concrete Kain worldview. The nut-game while very disturbing makes the entrapment of the soul way more real and gives the focus some context. (It also doesn’t only connect it with the polyhedron since “anything can be a focus. A polyhedron, a room, a nut”.) The same applies to the clocks and their connection to the save system, which makes the miracles of the Kains way more real. And I digress. Only time will tell.

Conclusion:

I think it is clear by now, that this way too long text isn’t really about giving answers and more about perspective. I myself would say that the Bachelor’s choice is terribly misguided most of the time and the only possible method to save anything at best. But I do not think that it is made with its destructive force in mind. What I wanted to show is, that the motives and the narratives surrounding this ending are way more complex and also really, really interesting. (I just wanted to gush about this game!) As are the characters that comment on the situation at hand. And reflecting on how we judge them can say a lot about our own view and the world (this one as well as the Town on Gorkhon).

[maluminspace]

49.You can sleep I’ll keep u safe with Michael lol sorry I mixed u up with someone else

I decided to go in a very different direction for this fic 🙈 I hope you like it 💖

49 “You can sleep I’ll keep u safe”

The world is a dangerous place now. Anyone fortunate enough to survive the virus is doomed to a life of constant fear and uncertainty.

Luckily you and your best friend, Calum, had met with a group of other survivors not long after the first outbreak had claimed the lives of billions.

In the weeks since all communication had finally cut out, your rag-tag bunch has been crafting an abandoned farm into a base. It’d worked well so far, having surrounded the grounds with barricades, fences and hand-made devices that will alert you if any of the ‘infected’ wonder too close to your new little dwelling.

As grateful as you are to have people who can look out for you and protect you, being holed up at the farm had started to drive you mad. It’s for this reason that you jump at the chance to accompany Calum and a couple of the others on a supply run into the nearest little town.

The walk ends up being entirely miserable. A heavy rainstorm delays parts of your journey. Your little group is forced to take a longer route to avoid flooded paths and at times the rain comes down so heavily that you have no choice but to take shelter until the worst of it passes.

You feel a wave of relief when you finally reach the little town. Your group makes a mutual decision to split up for an hour to check as many buildings as possible before heading back to base with your haul. You agree on an assembly point and head off in different directions.

Not a single word passes between you and Calum as you set off together down the Main Street. The two of you have been friends for longer than you care to remember and it makes words unnecessary a lot of the time.

The two of you silently scope out the front of a few of the buildings. Unsurprisingly, most of the shops and public buildings seem to have already been ransacked.

“This could turn out to be a wasted journey.” Calum frowns as he cautiously steps over the threshold of what was once a little grocery store. “I hope we can at least find some stuff that we can plant back at the farm. No one else seems to be thinking long term...”

Your friend’s sentence trails off when the sound of grunting and scuffling reaches you.

“It’s coming from back there.” You whisper, pointing to the rear of the store.

Calum nods, his expression serious and focused as he holds up his baseball bat in front of him, ready to attack at a moment’s notice.

You prepare your own weapon, a long metal pipe that you’d acquired weeks ago. It wasn’t the strongest or most sophisticated of defensive items but it’s served you well enough so far.

Calum steps ahead of you, silently insisting that he leads the way. It’s not surprising, he’s a sort of natural leader and protector.

The two of you tread carefully, ensuring you avoid the various items littered across the floor. As you approach the back of the shop, the daylight fades significantly. You can just about make out the shape of an infected. It’s limbs twisting unnaturally as it scratches against a door that seemingly leads to a little office or store room.

The undead creature barely has chance to turn it’s broken face towards you before Calum sends his bat crashing into it’s scull with a sickening crunch.

The infected corpse collapses instantly, falling into a crumpled heap on the grimy floor.

“Why was it trying to get into that room?” Calum asks, moving his gaze cautiously from the motionless body of the infected to the door it’d been trying to get through.

“There’s probably rats in there or something.” You shrug, although you don’t really believe that. The corpses can feast on rats at pretty much any given moment of the day. The vermin had spread like wildfire since humans were no longer around to deter them.

Luckily, you know that Calum’s curiosity isn’t going to let him walk away until he’s checked the room out.

It’s pointless telling him to be careful. Calum has always been brave and a little reckless, even in the years you’d known him before the virus had destroyed everything and everyone you’d both loved.

He gestures for you to stay back as he tentatively tries the door handle. The metal bar moves freely but when Calum tries to open the door it only moves a tiny bit like there’s something propped up behind it to keep it closed.

You exchange a significant glance with Calum, silently agreeing that forcing your way inside blindly might be a bad idea.

Stepping forward you open the door as wide as it will go, which is barely an inch or so. “Hello...” you whisper, “is someone in there hiding?”

Your question is met with complete silence. You turn back to exchange a confused look with Calum. “Someone has to be in there, right?”

Your best friend shrugs is broad shoulders as he peers into the darkness around the back of the store. “Maybe there’s another exit from that room somewhere.” He ponders our loud. “Maybe whoever barricaded that door got out another way?”

Judging by the size of the store and the distinct lack of other doors, something tells you that whoever or whatever made the barricade is still inside that room. The only question is, are they still alive.

“There’s no grunting or anything.” You whisper, still listening carefully through the tiny gap between the door and the frame that you’d created. “Maybe whoever’s inide is just asleep or something?”

Calum makes a sceptical noise. “With that thing scratching at the door?” He asks, jabbing his bat at what remains of the infected former person. “Would you be able to sleep knowing that it could get in?”

Before you can reply a weak noise, something like a sob or a whimper, comes from the other side of the door.

You hold up your hand to stop Calum from talking before cautiously moving a little closer. “Hello... who’s in there? You don’t have to be scared. We won’t hurt you.”

When you receive no reply, you gesture to Calum to say something, knowing that whoever is inside is probably scared and need of reassurance.

“Yeah... We won’t hurt you.” Calum shrugs. “We killed the thing out here, you’re safe now.”

After another moment of silence, a weak, scratchy voice asks, “really?”

“Yes!” You reply a little too eagerly, excited to have found another survivor after weeks of convincing yourself that the little group you’d found with Calum were the only people left. “You’re okay now, we can help you.”

Calum frowns at you. His protective nature obviously kicking in. “Careful.” He whispers. “We don’t know who this person is.”

You roll your eyes at him. “There’s a survivor in there, Calum! We have to help them.”

Before Calum can argue with you, there’s a shuffling noise from inside the barricaded room. You both turn your full attention to the door as the sounds of heavy objects being scraped along the floor interrupts you.

Calum instinctively steps in front of you by you shove him to one side that you can stand next to him. “I’ve told you a million times, Cal.” You huff, “I’m just as capable as fighting as you and besides...” you can feel your expression softening as you look at your best friend. “We agreed that we’d face every danger we come up against, together. That’s how we lived before all this happened and it’s how we’ll live now, yeah?”

A tiny smile touches Calum’s lips as he nods, touching your shoulder apologetically.

When the previously barricaded door slowly creeps open, both you and Calum snap your faves towards it, your weapons held tightly at your sides.

It take a moment for the stranger to step out of the dark room. They seem to have a slight limp and they seem frightened as they step into the dim light.

Your heart aches at the sight of the obviously scared man as he looks at you nervously. He has a kind face, although it’s partly covered with a long, matted blonde fringe. A thick stubble is covering the majority of the lower half of his face and his pretty green eyes are red rimmed and damp.

“You haven’t been bitten or scratched by one of those ‘things’ have you?” Calum asks, his voice a little coarse and harsh in your opinion.

The stranger shakes his head as he turns his startled gaze to Calum and then the corpse your friend is pointing at with his bat. “I’ve just been hiding in there for... I don’t even know how long.”

Calum regards the other survivor, obviously searching for the tell-tale signs of infection. You’d do the exact same thing if you weren’t so taken by this stranger’s beautiful green eyes. Maybe it’s because you’ve been surrounded by the same faces for weeks now, it’s nice to have a new one to look at.

“Are you alone?” Calum asks, startling you out of your daze.

The blonde man hangs his head and curls in on himself a little. “I am now.” He whispers hoarsely. “I had a friend, we were heading into the countryside to search for other survivors but...” The stranger’s voice breaks, a rough sob tearing out of his throat.

Without thinking about your own safety, you step forward, ignoring Calum’s warning tone as he huffs out your name. This stranger needs comforting and you’re obviously more qualified to offer that than Calum.

“I’m sorry you lost your friend.” You offer, gently reaching out to touch the blonde man’s shoulder. “I’m sure he’d want you to be safe, though. We can definitely help with that.”

“As soon as we’re sure we can trust you, of course.” Calum cuts in.

The stranger rubs his damp eyes with the back of one hand. “I don’t know how to that.” He shrugs, “I’m just... I’m alone and lost and I...”

You hush the stranger gently. “I believe you.”

The blonde man meets your gaze properly for the time, his eyes betraying his disbelief that you’re so willing to help him. “If we don’t trust each other these days, we have nothing.” You smile gently. “What’s your name?”

“Michael.” The stranger replies hesitantly.

You smile before introducing yourself and Calum. “We need to get the permission of the rest of our group before we can take you back to our base.” You turn to

Calum, ignoring his disgruntled expression. “Why don’t you go gather the others? I’ll grab whatever I can salvage from this store and Then we’ll meet you at the gathering point in ten minutes, yeah?”

It’s obvious that Calum isn’t happy about leaving you with Michael, but your suggestion is the most logical plan and he knows it.

“Fine.” Your best friend concedes. “If you need me, just yell, okay?” He shoots Michael a warning look before traipsing back to the front of the shop.

A moment later the front door opens and closes, signalling Calum’s exit from the store.

“You don’t have to take care of me.” Michael says quietly, “I can find another group...”

You shake your head, cutting the blonde man’s sentence short. “Our group needs to grow if we’re gonna survive longe term.” You explain. “There’s no reason you can’t be one of us, is there?”

Michael gives you a shy smile. “Well I hope the others like me more than your boyfriend does.”

A tiny laugh escapes you. “Calum’s not my boyfriend, he’s just very protective. You’ll see when you get to know him.”

“I hope he lets me get to know him.” Michael says, attempting a step back towards the room he’d been hiding in. His limp seems a bit worse now that he’s been standing for a while.

“Are you hurt?” You ask cautiously, hoping more than anything that Michael hadn’t been lying when he’d told Calum he hadn’t been bitten.

“I twisted my ankle running away from that thing.” Michael replies, pointing to the dead body. “I can still walk, though.”

You’re a little sceptical about his last comment but you watch with interest as he hobbles back into the room. He emerges a few moments later with a backpack and an arm full of bottled water, canned food a few bags of sweets. “There’s more stuff in there too.” He says “maybe Calum will like me more when he sees that I have supplies and treats.”

You smile gratefully. “You’d really share all that with us?”

Michael nods. “If your group will take me in I’ll do whatever I can to help and sharing this stuff would be the very least you all deserve!”

There’s something incredibly likeable about Michael. Despite his obvious sadness about the death of his friend, he’s willing to open up to you and trust you. That means a lot in these uncertain times.

The two of you chat casually as you gather up whatever supplies you can find. Michael understandably seems a little shy and nervous. You do your best to reassure him that things will be better when he’s accepted into your group. “It’s a little less stressful when you have people to watch your back.” You reassure kindly, taking the little box of bandages he offers to you. He’d found them on the floor behind the counter amongst some other discarded elements of a broken first aid box.

He smiles gratefully. “I just hope they can accept me, I don’t really want to be alone anymore.”

“You won’t have to be.” You smile gently. “Come on, lets go meet Calum and the others.”

Michael nods apprehensively as he follows your lead. You listen to his uneven footsteps as you both step out of the shop. The rain has worsened again since you’d entered the store with Calum and you’re concerned about the journey back to camp.

Your worries about the rain seem to be mirrored in the faces of your companions when you meet them at the assembly point you’d agreed on earlier.

“I don’t think it’s safe to head back today. It’ll be dark before we’re even halfway there and we can’t risk being out in the open after nightfall.” Calum yells over the pounding rain. “I think we should find somewhere to set up camp until the morning.”

His suggestion is met with a murder of agreement from the rest of the group. No one seems particularly happy about the idea, yourself included, but it’s definitely the safest option you can think of.

Calum leads you all to the outskirts of town. His survival and leadership instincts telling him that it’s better to be away from the bulk of the buildings just in case the former residents of the town are still hanging around.

There’s a large house that’s set apart from most of the other buildings on the main toad in and out of the town. Calum and a coupe of the others scope it out to ensure it’s empty and safe before they allow the rest of you in.

Once you’re all inside, you introduce Michael to the rest of the group. Most of them seem to share your view that taking him in would be beneficial, knowing that the farm is going to need a lot of work and the more people there is to all of that labour, the better.

After a quick meal of crackers and apples that you’d brought from the farm, Michael shares one of his bags of sweets with everyone.

Unsurprisingly, Calum volunteers to be take the first watch. The house is big enough to warrant a two person watch at all times, therefore you volunteer to take it with him. After sorting out the schedule for the rest of the night, you insist that Michael gets some much needed rest. “Seeing as you’re new, you don’t have to take a turn to be look out tonight.” You smile, offering him one of the blankets you’d just found in a cupboard upstairs. “You definitely need all your strength for the walk back to the base tomorrow.”

Michael eyes you uneasily. “I’m not sure how much I can sleep.” He confesses, “This is the first night I’ve spent out of that tiny store room since my friend died...”

Despite knowing very little besides his name, you wrap Michael in a comforting hug. “You need your rest, your friend wouldn’t want you to make tomorrow’s journey any harder than it needs to be.”

Smiling sadly, Michael curls up on the floor, snuggling under the blanket and using his worn out backpack as pillow. “I miss him... We were friends for years before all this.”

The pain in Michael’s voice almost breaks your heart. It resonates with you because despite belonging to a group now, you don’t know what you’d do without Calum. He’s your best friend, your rock, the person you love and trust more than anything.

A quiet sob escapes Michael as he curls up into a tighter ball.

It might seem overly familiar for someone that you’ve known for just a few hours but you can’t help yourself. You stroke Michael’s hair gently before wiping a tear from his grimy cheek. “It’s okay, you can sleep now. I’ll keep you safe.” You whisper, already knowing that the words leaving your mouth are entirely truthful. Michael is going to be a huge part of your life from now on, you just know it.

Masterlist

[mugprint]

Vampire!Kris X Vampire Hunter!Ralsei

Hometown. A nice little town of monsters. It lived up to it's name for everyone who lived there, including the adopted child of Toriel Dreemurr, Kris. The town had thought they were human. They didn't know enough about humans to knows that it wasn't normal for one to avoid all sunlight(causing very pale golden skin) and not speak. At all. Other than that, they were a regular human.

Except that they weren't human.

Unfortunately, the first to find that out wouldn't be someone they knew and trusted. It would be a vampire hunter named Ralsei, who showed up in town one day claiming he had heard reports of a, you guessed it, vampire in this area. Kris wanted to stay in their house until Ralsei left, but he wouldn't until he caught this so-called vampire. At least he stayed out of everyone's way.

A few days passed without Kris being able to eat anything, and by now, they were absolutely starving. They had to go out and get something to eat, otherwise they would quite literally go insane and/or die. The first one was much more likely, and as they didn't want to end up hurting Toriel or anyone else, they went out one night to get some sort of animal from the human town nearby. They thought they were careful enough not to be caught by Ralsei on one of the goat monster's night patrols. But they were pretty loopy from hunger and didn't hear him. They probably wouldn't have heard him anyway because of how quiet he was being.

Which is why they had no time to react when they were shoved and pinned against a wall.

"Why are you out here so late?" Ralsei's annoyed voice reached Kris's ears. "You're going to get caught. Don't you know why I'm here?" Kris stayed silent, as they usually did. "Well? Answer me!" Even if they could speak, they wouldn't. Partly because they couldn't think up a believable lie, and partly because their hunger was reaching its limit. Fresh blood, right there… No, they had to keep control. They don't bite monsters. Ralsei finally figured it out from their silence.

"...Oh. You're the one I'm hunting, aren't you?" He went quiet and grabbed his knife, but Kris couldn't take it anymore. If they didn't get something to eat now, they'd become like a feral animal. They grabbed Ralsei's shoulders and pulled him closer, digging their fangs into his neck. Ralsei's first instinct was to scream and push Kris away, which is exactly what he did before Kris could get their fill. It was just enough for them to regain their sanity, though. "Get away from me, you devil!!" Ralsei didn't hesitate any longer to attack. Kris was already expecting it and dodged, then immediately made a run for the trees where Ralsei couldn't follow them too long. As expected, Ralsei ran after them, his eyes gleaming with murderous hatred. Kris made a sharp left turn once they were in the middle of the woodland and Ralsei followed suite. He followed them through every attempt to lose him and their energy was depleting quickly. They couldn't run for much longer than 2 minutes in this state, and they knew it. Ralsei seemed to figure it out too, judging from the triumphant smirk on his face. That time was shortened even more when a stray root tripped them up. They couldn't get back on their feet fast enough to escape before Ralsei kicked them back down. "Say goodbye, devil." He raised his knife to strike the killing blow, but something in their eyes made him hesitate. Something he hadn't seen in other vampires before. Usually, they were glaring at him with all their hatred, but Kris just looked scared, silently pleading for him not to kill them. They closed their eyes tightly and whispered two words before the attack they knew would come.

"I'm sorry…"

"...What are you doing?" Kris opened one eye again to see Ralsei shaking above them, clutching his knife tighter than ever. "What are you doing!? Stop trying to make me feel sorry for you! You shouldn't exist! STOP IT!!" Kris didn't know what to do. They didn't even know what they had done to make Ralsei act like this. They didn't have time to think on it either before he shoved his knife into their shoulder. They couldn't cry out in pain, only wince and try to cover the wound once Ralsei ripped the weapon out again. Blood seeped through their fingers in a flood, unable to be stopped or slowed. To his surprise, Ralsei felt guilty.

'Why… Why do I feel so bad about killing a vampire? It's just like every other time, this one's no different.' But he couldn't get that feeling to go away, not while Kris was still trying vainly to stop the flow of blood from their shoulder and weren't even trying to get up, and much less hurt him again. '...Dammit.' He gritted his teeth and pulled Kris up.

"Why are you acting so pathetic? It's ridiculous for a vampire." Kris grimaced at that word. 'Vampire'. They hated it. But right now, while they were bleeding out, they couldn't do much. Ralsei turned them so that their injured shoulder was facing him. "Don't make me regret this." He said as he lifted his hands to use a healing spell on them. Kris stayed still and let him heal them, sighing in relief as the pain faded and the wound faded to just a scar. Ralsei stopped using his magic at that point and started walking away before Kris could thank him. However, he stopped and looked around a few steps away, realizing that he didn't know the way back to town. He had been in such a blind rage chasing after Kris that he didn't remember the route back. Kris took a step forward, realizing that he had no idea where he was going. Ralsei immediately turned back upon hearing them approach. "I don't need any help, if that's what you're thinking. Or were you going to attack me?" Kris put their hands up and shook their head. Ralsei rolled his eyes and started walking in the direction he thought Hometown was in. Kris didn't correct him, since he'd only get mad if they did. They went off to their original destination instead, the human town, to satisfy their lingering hunger. They hadn't gotten much from Ralsei, after all. But what would they do next time they became this starved? Would Ralsei be gone by then? They weren't even sure if they wanted him to leave, for some weird reason. Oh well.

~A few days later~

It was happening again. Kris's starvation. The little things they could eat hadn't held it off much longer than the first time. Once again, half-loopy from hunger, they went out that night to get something to eat. How much longer would this go on? Until Ralsei left, they guessed. But they also guessed that wouldn't happen soon. Then, as if their thoughts had summoned him, Ralsei stepped out in front of them.

"Going to hunt again? Why not just starve in your house or get some sun for a while? It'd make my job a lot easier." Kris's breathing shook for a moment as their instincts spiked. But they wouldn't attack. They don't attack monsters if they can help it. The occasional jerky human, sure, but never a monster. Not even Berdly.

...Okay, MAYBE Berdly if they were desperate, but no one else.

"Why don't you talk? I've barely heard you say anything. Usually vampires spout every insult they can think of at me before I kill them, but I've only ever heard you mutter an empty apology." It hadn't been empty, they were truly guilty about having to bite Ralsei, even if he was trying to kill them. "So?" He pressed, walking closer. "Say something. The next thing that pops into your mind." Kris stepped back as Ralsei approached, covering their mouth.

"Stop…"

"Hm?" Ralsei tipped his head to the side. "Stop what? Stop telling you to talk? Stop getting closer to you? Are you actually trying NOT to bite me again?" He laughed softly. "Strange vampire. I'd have thought you'd be getting whatever prey you can get your filthy hands on." He continued moving towards Kris, seeming amused by them moving away, "Why not bite me again, Mister Control? You're HUNGRY, aren't you? Who knows, you might even kill me. Then your problems would go away, wouldn't they?" Kris's eyes widened at his statement. They didn't want to kill anyone. They didn't even want to be a vampire. It wasn't their fault they were turned. It wasn't their fault they had to be this thing, IT WASN'T THEIR FAULT. They shook their head before running back into the woods, back to the human town, where the situation was no better than Hometown.

Ralsei hesitated to follow them, surprisingly. He hadn't expected them to react like that. He didn't know how he had expected them to react, but now he felt like he had to fix it. He started running after Kris, just barely keeping sight of them through the trees. Less than two minutes in, he was at the other side, at the human town. Kris had fallen to their knees at the edge of the trees, covering their mouth with one hand and already visibly exhausted. No food meant no energy, and right now, they almost wanted Ralsei to kill them. Instead, after a little bit of hesitation, he bent down and put his hand on their back.

"I'm… Sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you like that." Kris tried to push Ralsei away, but they barely had enough energy to stand up, much less fight against this. "I don't understand your mindset. I haven't met any vampires like you before." He tilted his head slightly, exposing the scabbed bite mark from a few nights before. "If you bite me, it's okay." The scent of blood was almost too enticing for Kris to stand, yet they still held back from biting again. That was one time, ONE time that they had lost control. They wouldn't bite a monster again if it killed them. Then again…

"Well?" Ralsei's voice seemed to snap them out of their thoughts. "Are you going to bite?" Kris was considering this, but pushed themselves away and shook their head again despite the obvious. "You're going to die." Ralsei insisted. He didn't know why, but he did. Kris saw the knife that Ralsei used last time, picked it up, then held up Ralsei's hand and put it in his palm. He closed his hand around the handle and looked at them with confusion and maybe just a little concern. They patted his hand, then pointed at their chest where their heart was, and Ralsei realized.

"You want me to…" Kris nodded and pressed their palm to their chest before laying it back down beside them. Ralsei looked down at the blade in his hand. 'Why am I hesitating? This is my whole job. But they don't deserve it. They're asking me to kill them so they don't hurt anyone. Why are they like this? It doesn't make sense.' Kris patted Ralsei's shoulder, interrupting his thoughts. He looked up to see them smiling at him. One of their eyes was partially uncovered by their hair, dimly glowing dark red. Somehow, their expression made the situation worse. "I don't… I don't want to do this… I don't want to kill you. I don't know why, I just… You don't deserve that." Kris's smile fell at those words. They let go of Ralsei's shoulder and looked down at the knife in his hand. Would it be so hard to do it themselves? It already hurt to exist like this. A quick stab wouldn't do much more, right?

Ralsei saw them looking at the knife and quickly put it away. "Don't… Listen, just bite me. It'll be better that way." Kris hesitated to refuse this time. Their hunger was only getting worse by the moment, at this point it was almost overwhelming. Ralsei only waited a few seconds before grabbing Kris and pulling them close. They reluctantly opened their mouth and bit down in the same spot as last time. Ralsei stiffened up from the pain and they immediately felt guilty, but there was no turning back now. They were trying to be careful enough to not drain too much blood, yet Ralsei still ended up close to passing out by the time they stopped. They hadn't gotten their fill, but getting their fill would've meant taking so much that he'd die. Instead, they stopped halfway and helped him stand up so the two could go back to town. The moment Ralsei got up, he was hit with a splitting headache and had to lean against them, making Kris feel even more guilty about the whole situation. They walked him back to Hometown, yet he couldn't keep his eyes open and collapsed against them. Kris couldn't carry him too long and just decided to sit him down against a tree. Of course they couldn't leave him alone, so they sat down next to him to protect him from anything that might attack.

~•The next morning•~

Ralsei woke up to see peaceful forest scenery dappled with light shining through the leaves and Kris sleeping with their head on his shoulder.

'Wait.'

He quickly connected the dots. Not about last night, he figured that out the moment he woke up. The dots he connected were about the time of day. 'It's morning. Sunlight. THE VAMPIRE.' He jolted up and started shaking Kris awake as well.

"Wake up, it's morning!!" Kris opened their eyes and pushed Ralsei away, rubbing their eyes. They stood up and stretched, not yet realizing the situation. Ralsei stood up as well and started walking back to Hometown, which he could faintly see through the branches. Kris followed, occasionally getting hit by the little spots of sunlight but not feeling them through their clothes. The only time they felt it was when the light touched their head or hands. The first time they felt it, they started walking faster to get back to Hometown, even though it meant more exposure to the light. Ralsei led the way back and they finally reached it. Kris finally realized that they were in more danger here than the forest and hesitated to step beyond the treeline. Ralsei, however, didn't stop. He pulled Kris into town with him, causing them to feel like they were being burned alive, their body was literally smoking. Yet Ralsei's pace didn't falter as he headed towards Kris's house. He quietly and agonizingly slowly opened the door and, after a little bit of checking for anyone else(no one was there), pushed Kris inside. The burning feeling faded after a few seconds in the shadows. Kris sighed in relief, rubbing their arms.

"You should be safe now, don't leave your house until night." Kris nodded at Ralsei's command and went to their room to recover from the weird effects sunlight had on them, even just a miniscule amount. Ralsei closed the door and walked away from the house, thinking to himself about what the heck he was doing.

'Why do I care so much about a vampire? I still have to kill them. Their kind is the scum of the Earth, and it's my job. So why did I help them? I should've left them in the sunlight to turn to dust.' He suddenly felt a pang of guilt at the image of Kris turning to dust in front of him, with that smile they had given him after they asked him to kill them in the human town. He stopped walking for a moment, then shook his head and headed for the forest. 'Stupid. I shouldn't feel guilty about killing them. They asked me to themselves.' And yet he still couldn't shake this weird feeling in his chest. This oppression and accelerated heartbeat. He hadn't felt anything like this before, and he swore he felt his face heating up thinking about Kris's smile and unique personality. He then realized he didn't know their name.

--------------------------------------------------

Oh my goodness @ask-tentale This is so freakin beatiful! Im just, do overwhelmed! I love this so much, and to think that this is not even done! Thank you so much!

( the only problem is that it made me WANT more. Not that much of a problem actually)

[douchebagbrainwaves]

STARTUPS AND JAPANESE

Are you writing pages of fiction, however bad? Honestly, no. The landscape of possible jobs isn't flat; there are walls of varying heights between different kinds of academic work, because fields vary greatly in this respect. But that rule may not be as good as it seems. I personally have timed out.1 There is actually some data out there about that. When you can ask the opinions of people you want to hear; an interview with Joe Kraus, the co-founder of Excite. If you start a startup. The second big element of Web 2. At least, that's how they see it. Worse still, anything you work on changes you. It was designed to be another C: C plus a few ideas taken from more advanced languages.

It's something that can be fixed in a couple days if you have the destination in sight you'll be more likely to arrive at it. I have never once seen a startup lured down a blind alley by trying too hard to make the cover something you can tell that by the number of Indians in the current Silicon Valley. Do you, er, want a printout of yesterday's news? There is a point where there is just too much to keep in your head at once. Even in college you get little idea what various types of work are like. The reason they were funding all those laughable startups during the late 90s was an abuse. The old ideas are so powerful that even the most successful countries, in the sense of something someone made happen. But she never does. There are two routes to that destination: The organic route is more common. But you don't regard this time as the prize and the time you could do what you would like to do, there's a strong inverse correlation between performance and job security. Is software a counterexample? If you have to do something, as Nike says, just do it.

In the rivalry between Perl and Python. The democracy component, for example. It's just a more extreme variant where you don't just use your software yourselves on their behalf. A few years ago. It's designed for large organizations PL/I, Ada have lost, while hacker languages C, Perl have won. Unless you're so big you have to manufacture your own hardware, or use your software on users's behalf, you'll learn things you couldn't have done that in the era of physical media. Not us. Lisp interpreter in the less powerful language?

They've faced resistance from investors of course. I'm convinced they got this number from ITA. People still pay for those. Partly because you can usually find ways to embody it in things people will pay for information otherwise? There are two possible outcomes for a startup to succeed, at least not in the sense that their main purpose is to make me feel better. And I think that's the main reason is that the absolute numbers seem so small at first. There hasn't been such a wave of new applications since microcomputers first appeared.

If you try to translate the Lisp/Perl/Smalltalk/Javascript code into Python you run into some limitations. There used to be for getting users. Now they have none that stand out. To be happy I think you have to pay for might as well not exist. Thump, thump, thump. Their standards for customer service have been set by the companies they've been customers of, which are Lisp data structures.2 A Lisp macro can be anything from an abbreviation to a compiler for a new language, it's because you think it's better in some way than what people already had. Except for some books in math and the hard sciences, there's no test of how well you've read a book, and that's as much as any startup needs initially. The old ideas are so powerful that even the most successful countries, in the sense we mean today.

On the whole they've done better than the stuff I read on individual people's sites rather than to magazine articles or news stories.3 An accumulator has to accumulate. Why do the Japanese make better cars than us? There was that same odd atmosphere created by a large number of small ones.4 Although we didn't fund Meraki, the founders were Robert Morris's grad students, looked at this definition of eval and realized that if he translated it into machine language, the shorter the program not simply in characters, of course, since they read somewhere that's the optimum day to launch something. So while there may be advantages to writing your application in the base language a language for writing programs like yours, then write your program in it. If you can't find ten Lisp hackers, then your company is probably based in the wrong city for developing software. Because how much you learn in college depends a lot more on you than the college.5

If you ask at that age, people will choose conservatively. It tries to explain why Americans make some things well and others badly. But the first time investors learned that lesson from founders. You need a great university near a town smart people like. You'll have to force yourself to work, and indeed that the reason they have to deliver every time. It's also wise, early on, to seek jobs that let you do what you like, but what we would now consider a very low-level, you reach a point where I'll do without books. 5% of the time you spend working as the pain you endure to earn it. Nearly all startups have to. When it was first developed, Lisp embodied nine new ideas. The terms cutting-edge. You push blobs of source code around the way a sculptor does blobs of clay. Plenty of people who will later do great things have careers with the trajectory of a ping-pong ball.

Thump, thump, thump. They're hostages of the platform. I would love programming in. They got started by doing something that really doesn't scale: assembling their routers themselves. See if you can stand, and the 2. What about iTunes? There is no one single force driving this trend. Ajax.

Notes

We probably would not make a brief entry listing the gaps and anomalies. What has changed is how much they lied to them? The answer is no grand tradition of city planning like the outdoors, was one of the rest generate mediocre returns, like storytellers, must have been a good way to predict areas where Apple will be big successes but who are good presenters, but when people are magnified by the same motives. Quoted in: it's not inconceivable they were saying scaramara instead of themselves.

In judging both intelligence and wisdom we have to think about, like play in a not-too-demanding environment, and others, and a t-shirt, they're nice to you. But which of them. But if you do it in B. Starting a company becomes big enough to absorb that.

If you want to start businesses to circumvent NWLB wage controls in order to avoid using it out of their time on, cook up a take out order. But the margins are greater on products.

It's hard to make a deep philosophical point here about everyday tagging. We didn't let him off, either as an adult. The two are not just the location of the words out of fashion in 100 years. 99 and.

Sparse Binary Polynomial Hash Message Filtering and The CRM114 Discriminator. Parents can sometimes be especially suspicious of grants whose purpose is some kind of gestures you use that instead. You won't always get a poem published in The New Industrial State to trying to sell your company into one? Other highly recommended books: What is Mathematics?

[rkkyg]

MNET GLOBAL AUDITIONS ; episode 2 interview 

              contestant #5027

he expected this as it had happened with the first episode. though knowing of the interview did not mean he would prepare of anything. it’s not like he could know what they want to ask though he has a vague idea. figuring it would follow along the lines of what they asked the first time. 

he’s not worried or anything--as in the first episode none of the interviews seemed to be shown in their entirety. they were all edited, of course, so he supposes he should watch to make sure he can’t be edited badly but. 

well yugyeom doesn’t care much.

What did you think of the results last week?

”last week?” he parrots part of the question, a small smirk forming as he answers. “expected.” and for a brief moment he debates on not following through with anything else. leaving them with a vague response. but... thats not really his style--plus he can’t miss the chance to talk himself up. 

“it was the first episode so there was bound to be a lot of people who don’t have what it takes just yet. i’ve been dancing for years so i didn’t really think i would get cut first round.” he says calmly, shrugging a little. it really looks as if he fully expected the outcome from last week. comfortable in his own abilities to perform and keep the judges attention. 

“i’d been more surprised if i hadn’t made it.”  

Who do you think is the best under each skill?

“i’m not really the best to critique singing or rapping. in the last few months i’ve gotten into rapping but i don’t have a lot of the technical talk down.” he admits, brows furrowing as he tries to think about how he would want to answer this one. thinking about the performances he had actively paid attention to and that stuck in his mind long enough to be able to talk about right now. 

“in singing i’d have to say PARK JINYOUNG.” and that was out of complete bias. “he really knows how to capture attention when he sings. it’s hard to not watch and always leaves me wanting to hear more. i was really impressed with his performances both this time and from last week.” he smiles a bit thinking about his hyung. loving the fact they both made it to this episode. he hopes they go far on here together--that maybe they get to work together on the show at some point. 

“for rapping...” he pauses, one particular performance flashing in his mind. it had surprised him a lot to see her last week. so much so he hadn’t know how to react--what to say. he still hasn’t approached her and he’s kind of hoping he never has. their relationship had been... okay... he loved her, he really had. but at the time.. at the time he was so messed up. all he feels now is apologetic to her. “CHOI YOONA... or bella. she rapped everyone else under the table. her performances have always felt so powerful. i think she’s someone to keep an eye on for sure.” 

his smirk formed again though. “as for dancing.” he chuckles. “i want to say myself, of course. its only natural to think yourself the best. but KANG HYUNGGU is giving me a run for my money. did you see how smoothly he transitioned from swalla to TT. i had major whiplash! but he did it so well, and it really worked with is performance!” yes he is taking this chance to gush about his best friend but who’s really surprised? his smile wide as he recounts the younger dancers performance. “i love seeing him dance and i really think he’s the best dancer here--tied with me, of course.” 

How do you think you did?

“i think i did great.” confident and cocky, that’s how yugyeom likes to roll. whats the point of changing this about himself now? he could have tried for that humble route--that i’ll keep working hard to be better---but why would he want to do that? he already spent the whole first episode talking himself up. might as well keep goin.

and its not like he doesn’t think this about himself anyway. he is confident. 

“i was a bit tired today--late night from practicing and work. but even not being at full power today i still made that stage mine.” he admits to being tired, wondering if that could get him more brownie points. kim yugyeom performed that well despite being exhausted. “i felt like the stage itself didnt want me to walk off when i was done. i know i didn’t want to. especially not when i felt so good about the performance. that kind of feeling... that feeling stays with you.” 

Were there any performances you liked?

he nods without a moment of hesitation but surprisingly it’s not hyunggu who he names first. “i really enjoyed TAKADA KENTA. his dancing was really impressive and i like the energy he has when he performs. i enjoyed watching him a lot--someone i think i’d like to see more of. he has a nice presence.” 

“also LEE SUWOONG. that guy...that guy....” he breaks off with a laugh. “that guy really knows how to make his performances amusing. i was surprised to see him go up with that song choice but... it worked for him. and i enjoyed watching it.” he chuckles more. “yah, suwoong hyung are you going to use funny songs the whole season?” 

Were there any performances you didn’t like?

he takes a moment to think before answering this one even though he already has a performance in mind that hadn’t sat well with him. “yeah... KANG DANIEL’s performance was... lacking this time.” he says slowly, partly wondering if he should hold back from saying all that he thinks. but well--they did ask. and yugyeom isn’t one to sugar coat himself.

“he was a singer last week right? i thought he sang really well--he lacks appeal in my opinion. not really someone i would care much to see perform, but his voice was really nice and i think he could develop into a solid performer. but...” he makes a confused face. keeping his tone light so that it doesn’t sound like he’s just outright attacking daniel. “why... i’m not sure why he decided to switch to rap. personally for me... his performance really dropped. i think he should have stayed with singing...” 

What did you think of  KIM MYUNGSOO’s performance?

“thats the guy who did the tvxq song right? why did i fall in love with you?” he questioned and continued when he got a nod. “ah he was so good... that was such a good song choice first of all--but then he covered it so well. his vocals were really nice. plus he didn’t seem too uncomfortable on stage--not that i could tell.” he smiled, seeming to have genuinely enjoyed myungsoo stage. “like i said i don’t know much about the technicals with singing but i wouldn’t mind hearing him sing again.” 

“and he was sooo handsome.” his expression becomes wistful as if he were wishing to be that good looking. “a face made really well, like he really captured my eye before he sang and then i was really impressed hearing his voice.” 

Is there anyone you are certain will move onto the next phase of the MGAs?

“myself.” he starts and the interviewer really shouldn’t have been surprised with this answer considering his track record when it comes to self confidence. “i’m comfortable with my performance today and confident i showed that i’m able to dance in more than one style. i want them to know i’m versatile. the next step is to show i can improve--which i believe i also showed a bit of on this stage today.” he chuckles to himself. 

“also hyunggu, of course.” he grins, picturing his best friend who he actually didn’t talk about all that much today. “i think it’d be weird if we didn’t make it to the next round. at least this early on. we’re both solid dancers and i know hyunggu made an impression today. im still blown away.” 

Is there anyone you are certain will be eliminated today?

“i wouldn’t say there’s anyone i’m certain will be eliminated...” he trails off slowly, picturing some of the performances in his mind. and he knows who he wants to say but he feels a bit bad. he already spoke down about daniel earlier in this interview. but he does think that daniel could bite the bullet this time. especially because of his change in performance skill--but then again that could also work in his favor. ceos see it as proof daniel is able to adapt---then theres the whole fact that this isn’t daniel’s first show. 

his expression had shifted to one of distaste. and he realizes he’s being so hard on daniel because he doesn’t like him which is not justified but he doesn’t care. “i think anything could happen.” 

[parkapetrs]

in the middle 05 | college!peter parker x reader

summary: in which you and a shy awkward boy named peter parker waltz in the gray area between friends and lovers

word count: 2.6k

warnings: language, physical assault scene 

PARTS: 01 02 03 04 05

05: shifting

“What the hell is going on?”

Ned was the first to speak. While the rest were left slack-jawed and frozen, he was unbothered and composed. Eyes darting between the quiet Peter and MJ, he pointed to the latter accusingly, “I thought you said she was on a date.”

MJ glared at Peter. “I thought you said she was on a date.”

“Jesus. That was the date with me, morons.”

A date?

“Oh,” said the both of them in unison. Facing MJ, Ned demanded, “Why didn’t you lock the door in the first place?”

“All you do is complain—“

Cutting her off, you exclaimed. “Are you gonna pretend like I didn’t just walk in on the three of you doing God knows what?!”

“That’s enough!” Peter boomed. Exasperated, he pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled loudly. His eyes were shut tight. “Look, I-I need you to leave.”

The room fell silent. Tears were threatening to prick your eyes—you’d never heard Peter yell before, and now he was yelling at you.

“Excuse me?” You croaked.

“No. No. Not you.” His hands were on either side of him, clutching the edge of the couch until his knuckles turned white. “MJ and Ned. Please leave. I’ll talk to Y/N.”

Neither MJ nor Ned met your eyes as they passed you on their way out of the apartment. Peter hurriedly threw on a random shirt that he pulled out of his backpack. He limped to the open window and drew the blinds close.

The two of you merely stared at the other from opposite sides of the room.

You couldn’t tear your eyes away from his swollen ones. His limbs were decorated with bruises and scratches, and his bottom lip bled from a cut. There was no slowing your mind as it desperately tried to make sense of the sight before you.

Oh God, Peter was one of those stoner kids that got into fights over a missing gram of crack. No, no. He was attacked on his way to Addington and now, it’s partly your fault. Are he and MJ dating?!

“Y/N,” he said slowly as if saying the wrong word could set off a bomb. “I-I don’t know what you want me to tell you.” He admitted.

“What happened to your face?!”

“Punched. Kneed,” he said almost automatically. Rehearsed. “Kicked several times. It still hurts like a bitch.”

Unamused, you simply glared. “But why though?” You knew your eyes were boring holes into him, but maybe that was just what you wanted.

There was a silence as Peter opened his mouth to speak. His lips made an ‘o’ shape to form words but nothing came out. He was obviously shaken under your scrutinizing gaze. The troubled look on his face made you want to take your question back, but the ball was in his court and you needed to see what he’d do with it.

Finally, when he realized you meant business, he settled. “I was mugged. Th-They took all my things, okay? I didn’t stand a chance but I had to at least… fight back…”

You shifted your eyes to his backpack on the floor, which was very much present and looked just as spick-and-span. If anything, it appeared even fuller than the last time you saw it yesterday. Peter was definitely bluffing, but for what reason?

“You’re lying. You have your bag.”

“It’s a spare I keep at MJ’s for emergencies.”

“Bold-faced lie,” you repeated. You knew you were on the verge of exploding; one sudden move could easily tip you off the edge. “Why won’t you just tell me the truth?”

“I—“ His leg shook as he unconsciously tapped his foot.

Before you knew it, you cut him off with a ramble. Words were spilling incessantly from your lips but you couldn’t get yourself to stop.

“You don’t trust me—I get it. But all I‘m asking is an explanation. You bailed on me without saying anything. I have every right! I’m not gonna judge if you dealt; I just wished—“

“WHAT?” Peter looked completely gobsmacked. “Let me stop you right there. Dealt? Deal what? Do you think I mess around with drugs?”

You blinked. “Well, how else could you explain this?”

There was a dumbfounded expression on his face. When he didn’t say anything, you continued. “The loaded backpack… the current state of your face… why else would you get beaten up?”

The laugh that escaped him was not the response you were expecting. It was your turn to feel dumbfounded. “What?”

“Nothing. It’s just… that’s the last thing I’d ever do. Ever,” he said in a dignified voice.

“Is it MJ then? Are you—Are you together?”

“What? No!” His tone was impatient. He closed his eyes for a while to regain himself, and when they opened, they were soft. Pleading, but sincere. “Y/N, look. There are things I can’t… yet explain. Not right now. Trust me, I wish I could tell you.”

Feeling apologetic and small, you walked over to him. “Okay. I get it. Truly, I do. I’m sorry for the outburst. I hope I didn’t overstep.” Your words hung in the air. There was a tug on your heart egging you to say what was on your mind. Before you could even stop yourself, you were staring right into his eyes and asking,

“But I have to know. Are you okay? I mean—are you safe?”

It wasn’t that you cared for Peter a lot. He was just a friend—a friend of a friend, in fact. Your friendship hasn’t even reached that level of concern. At least, you didn’t think so. But there was something about standing so close to him, almost feeling his breath, that made this moment feel personal. It felt yours.

Why did he have to call it a date?!

The tough expression on Peter’s face softened and got replaced with a fonder look. He was looking at you in earnest. “Yeah. I… I promise you I’m out of trouble.”

You reached a hand to cup Peter’s cheek, feeling his warmth radiating. You swore you saw him jolt from the sudden contact. Your finger grazed a cut on his cheekbone.

“You can open up to me. I do want to understand you.”

His lips curled up into a smile that reached his eyes.

A moment passed until the door flew open, causing you and Peter to spring apart. “Are you done here? I really need to pee!” MJ stormed in only to sprint to the bathroom.

Peter’s eyes were fixed to the ground and his ears were burning red. When you were sure MJ was out of earshot, you said to him, like adding insult to the injury, “Were you going to take me out for coffee today? Or on a date?”

He winced at your words like he’d just been slapped. He was looking everywhere but at you, refusing to meet your gaze.

“I’m really sorry about that! It was an easier way to hurry things up… Um, I needed MJ to let me go soon before you arrived from your ‘date’”—he said, making air-quotes—“so I could go pick you up at school.”

“Oh.” was all you said after his word-vomit. “Of course.”

He groaned in annoyance. He brought a hand up to his face, muffling any further sounds. Defeated, it was all he can do before saying, “Y/N, can’t getting coffee be a date to you?”

“Oh. Of course,” you repeated, but this time, the words were dripping with suppressed glee and excitement.

*

“Hey, why was Peter in the apartment the other day?”

It was the first time you mentioned it since that day, and although you had considered it to be water under the bridge back then, being in MJ’s presence after so long demanded some questions to be answered.

From her seat across you, MJ paused her typing. “You’re going out with him tonight, aren’t you? I’ll tell you when you get back—if he still hasn’t beat me to it. Which reminds me: you and him? Since when?”

You rolled your eyes, but her reply was better than being denied answers—as you were expecting—so you chose to settle with it.

“Since never,” you said. “We’re just getting coffee; it’s not a big deal.”

“Why don’t I believe you?” She chuckled, which earned her a kick in the shin.

A Friday night spent in the library never sat well with you, and by the time you emailed your professor your last paper, you were practically on your feet pacing back and forth, impatiently waiting for the email to go through. It was already quarter to ten. To make up for last time, you and Peter had agreed to meet in the nearest Starbucks at ten-thirty, when you were sure you’d be done working.

The nearest Starbucks happened to be a twenty minute walk from the library.

You hastily scooped all your belongings into your sling bag, said a rushed goodbye to MJ (who spent late nights there every day), and pranced out of the library. You checked your watch for the time: nine-fifty. You rationalized that you still had time to spare, so you made a quick stop at your apartment to get into a new change of clothes.

By the time you were done and running out, the time read ten-fifteen. You had changed into a dress which, admittedly, went a little too much for a simple coffee run. Maybe you did get carried away with ‘freshening up’, but you deemed yourself justified. After all, you were going out with Peter Parker.

Your phone chimed from a notification. It was from an unknown number.

Hey! I asked MJ for your number. Hope you dont mind 😅 you should text me when you’re close since I only live a few blocks from starbucks -Peter

It was a small gesture, yes, but you couldn’t help the blush creeping up your cheeks. He’d ask for your number. It wasn’t under the most romantic circumstances, but it worked for you. You hurriedly texted back an ‘okay!’.

It was already ten-twenty yet you were still within the university area. You were walking as fast as your freezing legs could take when you finally reached the outskirts of Addington. You’d heard of the back alley shortcuts that cut travel by a generous 10 minutes, so when you passed it, you didn’t hesitate to take the quicker route.

Now, you were a lot of things, but being a hypocrite wasn’t one of them. Everyone who knew you knew you hated tardiness. In fact, you would have berated Peter for it if he actually showed up last time. As a result, you desperately wanted to meet him on time tonight, even if it meant going through the darkest parts of Queens.

The back alleys were narrow passageways between the backs of adjacent buildings. The sounds of your sandaled footsteps echoed seemingly louder in the dark. You had just passed a group of boys who couldn’t have been older than you, gathered around a suspicious black bag of something. From the slur in their speech when they spoke, you didn’t want to know.

As you moved further, the alley grew increasingly darker and quieter. Sometimes, a stray cat would come out of a pile of trash, but other than that, you were the only living soul in there.

A few more minutes passed until the bustling sounds of downtown became audible. You could already make out the soft glow of some establishment’s neon lights. You stepped out of the alley where you spotted Peter’s apartment complex a few blocks ahead.

You decided to text him that you were close, but it was when you were about to hit ‘send’ that you felt two strong hands roughly pulling you back into the grimy alleyway.

“What the—“

You were pushed to the ground, your purse flying and landing a few feet ahead of you. Through the dark, you could make out two masked men scramble to your purse. Afraid of making noise, you watched as they rummaged through it. While they were occupied, you slowly moved backwards towards where you had come from, seeing the opportunity to make a run for it.

It wasn’t long until the sounds of footsteps came. Whipping your head around, you saw the silhouettes of two more burly men effectively blocking your only exit.

“Going somewhere, miss?”

You were trapped.

“There’s nothin’ here!” exclaimed one of the men, holding your purse up to show the group.

“She probably keeps it in her pockets,” said the other.

They both turned to look at you, chuckling as they saw your frightened expression. “Don’t be scared, little girl…”

You pleaded, “P-Please! Don’t come closer!”

You got up to your feet, your adrenaline urging you to make your escape. You ran as fast as you could towards the small crack of space they left, only to be pulled back. There was a sharp pain radiating from your lower back as it hit the ground.

“This is taking too long. Wallet, phone, now!” You were alarmed to see the two burly men who had blocked your exit earlier, now brandishing knives.

So you did the only thing you could do.

Scream.

Scream and hope to God someone hears you.

The odds were looking unlikely.

“Help! Please, anyone, help!” Tears were already streaming down your face while your heart beat wildly inside your chest. You were absolutely terrified.

“Shut up!” One man said, moving closer to you. “Stop moving!”

You were thrashing your arms around but the masked man had captured your wrists together, making you lose your hold on your phone. There was a loud ringing in your ears and a dull pain to your skull as your head met the concrete.

“Ow—! LET GO OF ME!!!”

Ring! Ring! Ring!

For a while, the whole world seemed to still around you. All five pairs of eyes landed on the mobile ringing loudly on the ground.

Incoming call: Peter Parker

Tears welled in your eyes. Your phone was no longer within your reach, as one of the men had managed to kick it further away from your grasp, along with the remaining hope inside you. The chances of being rescued were wearing thin.

Suddenly, your phone stopped ringing. And then, someone spoke.

“Found you. Fucking hell.” It was barely above a whisper, but you heard it in the silence. “Hey, you! She said let go!”

The voice was new and different and higher, unlike your current assailants’. You kept your eyes shut tight, still afraid and cowering.

The grip on you loosened and before you knew it, the masked man holding onto your wrists fell to the ground beside you, clutching his sides.

“You again? Bug off, Spider-Man. Actually bug off,” said one of them in a menacing voice with the other three breaking into laughter.

Spider-Man?

Through the dark, you could make out a flash of red and blue swinging around. From the ground, you could only watch the scene before you unfold. Spider-Man had managed to knock two men down, but the other two were a lot tougher with one of them still holding his knife.

You feel yourself growing weaker, the pain in your head getting the better of you. You close your eyes momentarily to regain control of your body. When you opened them again, Spider-Man was hovering over you, trying to shake you awake.

“Miss? Are you all right?”

His voice was muffled through his suit, but there was something familiar about it.

“Huh? Y-Yeah…” You blinked, still feeling a little disoriented. Looking around, you saw all four men webbed up against the wall. You must have passed out.

“Can you stand?” Spider-Man asked.

“I think so.”

You stand on your feet hurriedly which you immediately regretted, since you were now starting to feel lightheaded as a result. If it weren’t for Spider-Man, you would have fallen back to the ground. He had your arm securely draped around his neck as he helped you remain upright.

You looked down to where your hips touched and noticed a part of his suit looked darker than the rest.

“S-Spider-Man, you’re bleeding…”

And then everything went black.

A/N: and the plot starts to thicken! im thinking 2-3 more chapters left for this story. let me know what you want to see next in my next one! should i do a fic for tom holland or another peter parker? and what AUs do you want me to do? anyway, reblog to be tagged! and shoot an ask to be removed. as always, comments and reblogs and messages are highly encouraged.

PS, sorry for that assault scene! i understand the sensitive content so i’ve tagged the trigger warning. i wanted to avoid it, but seeing as this is a daily occurrence in the life of our hero, it was hard to go around it if i wanted to stay true to peter’s character!

@youllbemineandillbeyours @deadlyaffairs @melancholyandemotional @shockwavee @alexalltimelow @hbmoore1986 @missymariee @kharwreck @smexylemony @spideytaeh @tom-hollands-eyelash @curlypeter @ioikai @marco-hvittyvik @bigzaddyangie @woman-of-letters-legacy @punishblue @socially-awkward-xox @yourbiggestspiderfan @hollandshart @camilllaabeyo @panic-at-top @notunlimited @spidcr-man @tomhollandismysexuality @whostholland @angstyween @yungh0000d @everythingeverywherelistening @falalaholland

if you’re still reading, send a spiderweb emoji!

[livingcorner]

How to design a garden | Outdoor & Garden | B&Q

Create the garden of your dreams with a little imagination

Think of your garden, or any outside space, as an extension of your home or an “Outdoor Room”. But let’s not forget that this room is different because it is OUTDOORS! Which means as well as enjoying extra space, you can surround it with plants and life and bring you and your families and friends, closer to nature as well.

This might sound a little daunting. Perhaps your garden’s overgrown and wild; bare and uninspired or designed for one thing and you’d rather use it for another. Maybe it’s your first garden or you’re stumped for ideas and don’t know where to start.

You're reading: How to design a garden | Outdoor & Garden | B&Q

We asked our B&Q Gardener of the year judges Matt Childs and Humaira Ikram, RHS show winners and experts in the world of gardening, to share their tips and tricks with us. Find out more about them, and how you could become B&Q Gardener of the year, on our competition hub.

What sort of outdoor space do you want?

Is it for the kids to play in? Somewhere to eat and drink with friends and family? Or maybe one that’s all about growing plants and fruit and vegetables?

Deciding what you want to do in the garden is the first step. This will help you allocate space accordingly. You don’t want to create a large area for relaxation if the kids will need room to run around in. And this doesn’t mean choosing just one focus for your garden – it’s a space for all the family. It’s more about dividing it up to accurately to suit everyone’s needs.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

Be patient and see how you use the garden. Look for the Sweet spots in the sun at the times of day that you want to use them i.e. morning coffee time and evening relaxing time.

Get inspired

With the focus of your garden decided on, it’s time to seek out a little inspiration. The good news is that there are countless ways to do this. You might find that you like one method only, or a combination of many. There’s no right or wrong way to start collating your garden ideas.

Why not try:

Magazines and catalogues – it might be a gardening magazine or a feature exploring the garden of your favourite celebrity; a shopping catalogue or a Sunday newspaper.

Visiting outdoor places. From local parks to the garden of friends and family, trips to stately homes to favourite holiday destinations; look around and identify what you like about it. Take photos (if possible) and create a shortlist. These ideas might not be possible to recreate in your garden, but nothing’s off limits at this early stage.

Going online. Use online search and social media, such as Instagram and Pinterest, to find images of real-life gardens and more professionally photographed options.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

Create a mood board to bring together all your ideas and images. This can be a collection of magazine cut-outs or photos; or a virtual pinboard on Pinterest. It’s easier to visualise something on paper rather than in your head.

Read more: 12 Tips to Help You Start an Edible Garden

Choose a garden look

Examine your mood board to identify an emerging look that you like. Perhaps you’ve chosen a lot of one colour or favour a particular style. By pulling out these common elements, it will help you streamline what you’re looking for and see what might not suit this. Or maybe these contrasts don’t matter – you still want to keep them or you have a large enough garden to fit several different looks.

There are lots of garden design tips that may help you here, but it’s your garden and you should create something that will make you happy.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

Keep it simple as this will help you tie the garden together and make it feel like one whole garden rather than lots of different ideas. Using one type of material for the paving or a repeat of a plant will pull the scheme together.

Make a plan of the garden

It’s really good to have a rough plan of what you want down on paper. Measure up your space and then mark out where you want the different functions to be. It’s also a good time to think about different routes and paths that you’d like around your garden.

If you find your site is more complicated you can get some professional input from a surveyor, garden designer or landscaper. Don’t forget, Garden Designers or Landscapers may offer a consultation service, if you need more help and guidance.

Know your garden

Of course, there’s more to your garden than just it’s measurements. And it’s essential that these factors are also considered at this early planning stage.

Understand the climate and local geography

The healthiest and most manageable gardens work with the natural environment, including plants that would naturally thrive there. And even if you live in a particularly adverse spot (be it exposed and windy, or by the coast with salty breezes), there’s plenty you can do to make your garden more habitable to a diverse range of plants.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

See what’s growing next door! If it’s doing well in your neighbours’ gardens, it will probably work well in yours too.

Suss out the soil

Good soil is crucial for a healthy, beautiful garden. There are many different types – chalk, clay, sand, peat and loam – with loam the best of all. Knowing which type of soil you have will help you decide which plants you can grow, as well as how well they’ll grow once planted. It can also be important for landscaping projects, as some are harder to work with than others.

We also recommend testing your soil to find out its pH (the acidity). Some plants prefer ericaceous soil (acidic) while others like lime (alkaline) soil. And test the soil in various parts of your garden, as its pH might vary.

Consider your garden’s aspect

Which way is your garden facing? North, south, east or west? Whichever direction, or ‘aspect’ you have can help you choose where you want things to go. There’s no point having a decked area for enjoying the sunshine in the shadiest corner of the garden. Sketch the arc of the sun onto your plan, so that you can see where the shadows will fall.

And look out for micro-climates. All gardens contain a series of micro-climates that are partly determined by the compass direction each area faces. These offer different levels of light, warmth and moisture.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

Read more: Garden Hose Repair: 4 Fast (and Frugal) Fixes

Everyone wants their garden ready in time for summer so make sure you start early leaving yourself time to plan. We recommend people plan their gardens in Autumn to be ready for the following Summer.

Start sketching the new garden design

Now’s the time to start sketching your new garden layout. We recommend laying tracing paper over the original plan and adding the new features – playing with their shapes and sizes to see what works where.

Start with any garden buildings, structures and large items (like water features). This will help you see what space you have left and how they’re going to affect the rest of the garden.

Then it’s landscaping. This could be hard landscaping (such as paving or decking) or soft (like grass. Maybe you have space for a combination of options or pick just one. And then it’s everything else – beds and borders, kids’ play areas and more.

Look to achieve a balance. Pay equal attention to all areas to avoid one part looking busy while others look empty. And choose features that suit the space available. A giant structure or tree would swamp a small garden, whereas bigger spaces may need something grand and imposing to avoid getting lost.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

Try to maximise the green and living things in your garden. We like to have at least 50% of the space full of plants, if not more!

Schedule the changes: A phased approach

If you’re making a lot of changes, consider breaking the project down and completing it over a period of time to make the expense more manageable. Prioritise the jobs that need to be done to make the garden a usable space over the ones that are just nice to have.

Don’t be tempted to economise on soil preparation, especially when creating new beds or if you’re landscaping the garden of a newly-built home (where there’s a tendency to scrimp on topsoil). Invest in the best grit, soil improver, topsoil, mulch and any other improving products that you can – the boost these give to new plants is invaluable.

Even if you’re planning on doing as much as you can, remember that some jobs must be handled by professionals. Installing or moving gas, electricity or water pipes must be done by a registered engineer. And before you begin any outdoor electrical work (other than minor repairs and replacements) you must notify your Local Authority Building Control Department, which has responsibility for ensuring that this work is inspected and tested.

Matt and Humaira’s top tips

If time and budget don’t allow to build your garden straightaway then separate the plans into phases and start with the area of the garden with the most benefit to you. This is often the area closest to your home.

And those are our top tips for planning your garden – let’s get outside and make your new garden a reality.

Source: https://livingcorner.com.au Category: Garden

source https://livingcorner.com.au/how-to-design-a-garden-outdoor-garden-bq/

[phantom-le6]

Episode Reviews - Star Trek: The Next Generation Season 5 (5 of 6)

Continuing our voyages with the crew of Captain Picard’s Enterprise, here’s the penultimate round of episode reviews for season 5 of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Episode 21: The Perfect Mate

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

Kriosian ambassador Briam comes on board the Enterprise with some cargo, ready for a peace ceremony with the Valtian. As the ship heads to the rendezvous, they save two Ferengi from a failing ship. Despite security being assigned, one of the Ferengi enters the cargo bay and accidentally deactivates the stasis field on Briam's cargo, revealing a young Kriosian woman named Kamala (Famke Janssen). With the Ferengi secured, it is revealed that Kamala is an empathic metamorph who can sense what males around her desire and react appropriately. She was being brought for an arranged marriage to the Valtian representative. Kamala generates pheromones that can affect males around her, which was is partly why she was to be kept in stasis until the ceremony. The other part of the reason is that she is in the final stage of her sexual maturation and must soon permanently imprint upon the desires of one man for the rest of her life.

 Briam tells Kamala to stay in her quarters, but Captain Picard allows her to travel throughout the ship, with the unaffected Lt. Commander Data as her escort. This results in a fight nearly breaking out in Ten Forward, when Kamala begins to interact with several miners the Enterprise rescued en route to pick up the Kriosians. The Ferengi seek to bribe Briam to turn Kamala over to them, but he rejects their offer. As he leaves, they attack him, causing him to fall onto a glass table which shatters and to lose consciousness. The Enterprise turns the Ferengi over to the nearest starbase to stand trial, but Briam is unable to participate in the ceremony. Kamala helps Picard to take on Briam's role, and the two become close. He seeks to resist her abilities and asks her to be herself, and she explains that the woman he wants her to be is who she actually is.

 They meet with the Valtian ambassador, Chancellor Alrik, who is more interested in the trade agreement than the marriage. With the arrangements made, Picard visits Kamala to say goodbye; she tells him that she has permanently bonded with him instead of Alrik. Kamala explains that he has changed her for the better, and she will continue with the arranged marriage out of the sense of duty she has imprinted from Picard. At the wedding ceremony, Picard escorts Kamala down the aisle and watches as she marries Alrik. After the newlyweds have returned to the planet, Picard says goodbye to Briam in the transporter room. When asked how he resisted Kamala, the expression on Picard's face reveals how much of a struggle it has been and how much he feels he has lost.

Review:

This episode is something to flag up for fans of the original X-Men film trilogy, as it marks the one occasion where Patrick Stewart and Famke Jansen, who played Professor X and Jean Grey respectively in those films, worked together before those films.  Now for many people who have apparently reviewed this episode before, this episode falls a long way short of the word ‘perfect’ that comes up in the title.  Many apparently criticise the character Famke is given to play, namely that of a woman who is designed to be everyone’s perfect mate, and who is on the verge of an arranged marriage to end centuries of conflict between two alien cultures with a shared ancestry.

 Now to some degree, I can understand that criticism, given that marriage is something I don’t feel should be forced on anyone, much less be a tool for political purposes like peace treaties. After all, the intended husband isn’t even interested in the marriage, so you have to wonder what the hell the Kriosians are even playing at putting Kamala up for such a marriage in the first place.  Marriage is meant to be for those who want to formalise any form of romantic relationship they might be lucky enough to create, and that’s it.  They should not be ‘arranged’ until those who would be getting married decide that is what they want, and if some people just don’t want to marry, that’s ok too.  So, if the objection was to the idea of arranged marriage, or that every long-term relationship has to lead to marriage, I totally understand that.

 However, the objections seem to be more around the idea that Kamala is, according to Dr Crusher, on a mission that amounts to prostitution, and she is being treated more like property than a person.  Given that Kamala comes aboard the Enterprise as a piece of cargo in stasis when she could have transported to sick bay for the same effect (it wouldn’t be the first time Picard’s ship transported guests in a state of suspended animation), and is then confined to her quarters initially, I can also understand some of that objection as well.  That said, the episode establishes the Kriosians also have male empathic metamorphs, but they’re very common whereas female metamorphs are only born once in seven generations.  Although the episode doesn’t go beyond that, it’s reasonable to assume both sets of metamorphs have the same ability to sense and become whatever the opposite sex wants them to be.  This is something I don’t think other reviewers think of, and if true, it means Kriosian women are probably never short of an ideal mating partner compared to the non-metamorph male population.

 In addition, Kamala also states she takes joy in being whatever others want her to be, and does so in such a way that it appears to be almost part of her nature.  There are plenty of people in real life who also take pleasure in doing good by others, and where that is someone’s own choice rather than something forced on a person, it’s no bad thing.  Because of these facets of the episode, I think some reviewers judge the episode too harshly on the whole female metamorph premise.  They’re essentially saying female empowerment cannot take the form of someone like Kamala, when actually female empowerment should surely come in whatever form each woman chooses for themselves, because such empowerment is not about one person setting a single standard that all must follow.  It’s about giving everyone in the group that needs to be empowered the freedom to empower themselves in the way that works best for them as an individual.  Please yourself, please others, do both; as long as the choice is down to the person doing the pleasing and not anyone else, that is empowerment.

 All this said, the episode is actually supposed to be about showing us a chink in Picard’s customary stoicism and almost monk-like celibacy, but really, we don’t need this episode for that.  We’ve seen Vash get under his skin romantically, and we’ve seen Picard blow his stack a few times with good cause.  This episode is consequently quite superfluous in that respect, not to mention it works in the Ferengi to no good effect and much audience irritation.  In addition, Red Dwarf’s episode “Camille” featured a guest character with similar abilities to Kamala well over a year earlier, so the episode’s premise about a ‘perfect companion who can sense someone’s desires and become them’ is actually highly unoriginal.  This is the second or third time at least that Red Dwarf beat TNG to the punch on an idea, and frankly did it better.  Overall and on balance, I give this episode 5 out of 10.

Episode 22: Imaginary Friend

Plot (as given by me):

While the Enterprise begins investigating a nebula formed around a neutron star, Counsellor Troi works with a young girl named Clara Sutter, who has not long come on board the Enterprise with her father Ensign Daniel Sutter. The Sutters have moved between a lot of different postings, and as a result Clara has developed an imaginary friend called Isabella.  Her father is worried that Clara is relying too much on Isabella for friendship and no longer even trying to make real friends. While Clara is planting in the ship’s arboretum later, Isabella appears as a real human girl. She encourages Clara to take her to other areas of the ship, which lands Clara in trouble as Isabella disappears around any adults and the sections they go to are off-limits to children for safety reasons.  Only Lt. Worf initially sees Isabella at first because he encounters the girls when they are too distracted for Isabella to disappear in time.

 Worried that Isabella is now becoming a kind of excuse for Clara to get away with misbehaviour, Troi insists Clara spend some time around real children. She convinces Clara to leave Isabella behind when going to attend a ceramics class with the other children on the Enterprise. This angers Isabella, who first spills Counsellor Troi’s hot chocolate in her quarters, then ruins a cup being made by Worf’s son Alexander so that Clara would be blamed. Fleeing to the arboretum in tears, Clara is confronted by Isabella, who threatens to kill everyone on board. Troi initially tries to convince Clara isn’t real and does a check of her room, only for Isabella to appear and attack her with some kind of energy discharge.

 Meanwhile, the Enterprise has begun to get entangled in a lattice of plasma strands within the nebula that create a drag effect on the ship. Several energy beings then arrive and begin to drain the shields. Realising that the manifestation of Clara’s imaginary friend is some kind of alien life form, Captain Picard visits the arboretum along with Clara, her father and Worf. Isabella appears and declares her race wanted to try and feed off the Enterprise’s energy and determine if humanity was a threat; the crew’s treatment of Clara suggested to the aliens that humanity was cruel and mistreated their children. Picard explains that the rules Clara was subject to are a part of how humans keep their children safe until they have developed enough awareness not to know what is or isn’t dangerous, and offers energy to the aliens freely. Isabella accepts, and the alien beings within the nebula soon cease their attack.  After transmitting some energy into the nebula, the Enterprise leaves, Clara and Isabella making friends with each other again as they say goodbye to each other.

Review:

Although some scenes in this episode were a bit cringe-worthy and demanded some fast-forwarding, it has a very interesting premise that I think more people, especially parents, should consider.  Not only do we see a child’s imaginary friend become real, but then we get see how we might be judged if an alien opted to judge us from the perspective of a child.  I think Picard sums up best how great an idea this is when he confronts the alien posing as Isabella, and I quote;

“You are seeing this ship, all of us, from a unique perspective - from a child's point of view. It must seem terribly unfair and restrictive to you. As adults, we don't always stop to consider how everything we say and do shapes the impressions of young people, but if you're judging us, as a people, by the way we treat our children - and I think there can be no better criterion - then you must understand how deeply we care for them. When our children are young, they don't understand what might be dangerous. Our rules are to keep them from harm, real or imagined, and that's part of the continuity of our Human species. When Clara grows up, she will make rules for *her* children, to protect them - as we protect her.”

 Picard is totally right because if you look at how the adults deal with Clara, she gets told certain areas of off-limits, but never why, so how can she or Isabella know that what the adults are doing is for their benefit?  Somehow, they’re expected to just know without being told, and in that sense it’s not unlike what dealing with the world is like for autistic people like myself. Our ability to learn the unwritten rules of society, the so-called ‘hidden curriculum’, is impaired to a point where we need things spelled out, and yet at times our non-autistic peers seem even less aware of such things than we are.  All too often people like to assume others will just know what they know and never stop to think “what if they don’t?”  This is a key reason why I often tend to post longer posts on social media than I necessarily need to, and why I will often try and explain something to one of my nieces or nephews in full and not just go with the truly idiotic response of ‘because I said so’.  If you want anyone to learn anything, you don’t just tell them something, you teach them something.

 It’s also interesting to have Guinan in the episode advocating for us not to abandon imagination as we grow up.  A lot of this episode seems to be directed around the idea of getting Clara to abandon her imaginary friend, and could potentially be seen as somehow anti-imagination.  However, there’s Guinan spotting cloud-shapes in the nebula and talking about her own imaginary friend, and I think it’s important that we all keep some imagination as adults.  After all, imagination is part of how we find solutions to problems, and finding solutions is something the world needs to get back into the habit of doing.  These days, it seems more inclined to play blame games and complain without actually trying to wipe problems out so they don’t keep plaguing us.  For me, this episode earns 7 out of 10; it really needed some better scenes from some of the child actors in the middle, and frankly I think they went a bit too creepy with Isabella.  The dress that character wore just screamed ‘creepy twins from the Shining’ the moment I saw it, and that’s not a great image to have while watching Trek.

Episode 23: I Borg

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

The crew discover a wrecked Borg scout ship with a single survivor; an adolescent Borg drone. Dr Crusher insists on treating the surviving Borg despite the concerns of Captain Picard. On Picard's orders, the drone is confined and monitored by security forces at all times and is prevented from contacting the Borg Collective. Lt. Commander La Forge and Lt. Commander Data assist Crusher in bringing the Borg back to health. As they come to understand the workings of the Borg, La Forge and Data devise an idea of using the Borg drone as a weapon of mass destruction. By implanting an unsolvable geometric formula into his mind and returning him to the Collective, the formula should rapidly spread (similar to a computer virus) and disable the Borg. Crusher is aghast at this suggestion, considering it equivalent to genocide, while Picard and the other senior crew deliberate on the ethics of this plan.

 The Borg drone initially calls himself "Third of Five", but ends up referring to and understanding himself as "Hugh", the name given to him by La Forge. Hugh discusses how the Borg only wish to learn about other cultures through assimilation, but La Forge counters this argument, discussing aspects of individuality that make them human and unique. In further debates, La Forge finds himself becoming a friend to Hugh, and begins to doubt his previous idea. This is further complicated when Hugh shows elements of individualism. The crew now debate whether it is appropriate to sacrifice one individual to protect the majority, though Picard is still insistent on destroying the Collective. Crusher and La Forge arrange to have Guinan, who has a similar loathing for the Borg because they destroyed her homeworld, speak to Hugh.

 She finds Hugh to be not a mindless drone but a confused young man, and she agrees Hugh is no longer a Borg. Guinan convinces Picard to meet with Hugh, as well, and Picard comes to the same conclusion, in part because Hugh refers to himself as "I" instead of the Borg's collective "we" during their discussion. Picard abandons the proposed plan and instead offers Hugh asylum within the Federation. Hugh expresses enthusiasm at the prospect of remaining with La Forge but ultimately refuses, recognizing that the Borg will still come looking for him. He offers to be returned to the crash site, where he will be found and re-assimilated by the Borg. Picard hopes that, once Hugh is reconnected, the sense of individualism Hugh has learned will spread throughout the Collective. La Forge accompanies Hugh to the crash site and, from a safe distance, watches the Borg recover him. Just as the Borg transport out, Hugh turns to give La Forge a parting glance.

Review:

While many fans dislike this episode because they feel it de-fangs the Borg, I am not one of them.  What this episode does with the Borg is continue what “Best of Both Worlds” started to show us, and what later Borg stories would continue to show, which is that without the hive mind, these villains are actually nothing of the kind.  In essence, it’s the collective will of the Borg that drives assimilated individuals to commit horrendous acts against their will.  Split the individual back off from the collective, however, and the individuality starts to creep back in.  If anything, this episode helps showcase how truly horrifying the Borg are, because they turn individuals into mindless extensions of the group, and such is a fate worse than death.  If I was to take a tag-line from a Warhammer 40,000 race and apply it to the Borg, it would be the one about the Dark Eldar; pray they don’t take you alive.

 The episode is also interesting in that we get Picard and Guinan in the episode as people who have suffered at the hands of the Borg wanting nothing to do with this drone.  Guinan wants the thing straight up off the ship or dead, and Picard is perfectly ok with the idea of using the drone to wipe the Borg out completely, and yet both ultimately realise this lone Borg is as much a victim as they are.  Given how often some people in society who have been hurt come to hate anyone linked to their tormentors even when those people are innocent and may even be victims themselves, I think this is an important episode in TNG that should be viewed by as many people as possible.  There’s a great lesson here about not punishing an individual for the crimes of their states and only assigning blame where it is actually due. For me, this episode racks up 9 out of 10; it loses one point for a production blunder around using the “I” pronoun too early in the guest Borg’s progression towards individuality.

Episode 24: The Next Phase

Plot (as given by me):

The Enterprise receives a distress call from a Romulan warbird and goes to their aid, finding the vessel adrift and badly damaged. Commander Riker leads an away team over to the warbird that includes Lt. Commander La Forge, Lt Worf and Ensign Ro, with Ro muttering an objection to Riker’s order that the away team goes in unarmed. When La Forge and Ro try to beam back with a damaged engine component, their patterns are lost and the pair are believed to be dead.

 While Riker and Worf continue to work with the Romulans to save the stricken warbird, Captain Picard has Lt. Commander Data begin an investigation of the transporter accident, and Data also begins to try and plan a memorial service for La Forge and Ro. However, the two officers have somehow returned to the Enterprise, though neither of them can be seen by the other members of the crew, and both are able to pass through solid objects and all other people except each other. Ro, having seen Dr Crusher begin to make out death certificates, believes they are dead and begins to try and make peace with her fellow crew-members. La Forge, however, is convinced they are still alive, and convinces Ro to join him in tagging along when Data makes a shuttle trip over to the warbird.

 Following Data and examining the warbird soon enables La Forge to deduce what has happened; the Romulans were testing a way to combine their cloaking device with a phase inverter. In theory, such a combination would render a ship invisible to sight and sensors while enabling it to pass through solid matter. Somehow La Forge and Ro became cloaked and phased during transport. Overhearing the Romulans plan to use an energy transfer beam from the Enterprise to rig the other ship’s engine to explode when it goes to warp, La Forge and Ro become determined to undo their condition so they can warn their crewmates. However, the pair do not realise they are being followed by a Romulan who has somehow become phased like themselves.

 Back on the Enterprise, La Forge and Ro discover from Data that chroniton fields have been left everywhere they’ve been, and that these can be neutralised using anyon particles. While La Forge sticks with Data, and learns the chronitons result from a phased person passing through other objects, Ro follows the transporter chief, only to be cornered by the phased Romulan up on the Bridge. She ultimately manages to escape the Romulan, only to then be caught again after a chase through the crew quarters. La Forge stumbles upon the pair just in time to save Ro by hurling the Romulan out into space through the outer bulkhead.

 La Forge’s time with Data has also revealed anyon particles can de-phase and uncloak himself and Ro, and the pair promptly head to Ten-Forward where much of the crew has gathered for their memorial service. After several attempts, La Forge and Ro manage to make themselves briefly visible to Picard and Data, the latter swiftly realising what has happened and ordering a maximum-level anyon flood of Ten-Forward to aid their friends.  Once unphased and decloaked, La Forge orders the Enterprise’s engines taken off-line so he can reverse the Romulan sabotage. The pair then join the party-style memorial, and later discuss their experience with each other.

Review:

There’s not a huge amount to say about this episode because it’s one of those rare occasions where a Trek episode has no real depth or substance, which is ironic considering it deals with a main character and a recurring character being made into pseudo-ghosts.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s a fun episode to watch, especially for the somewhat New Orleans-style funeral in Ten-Forward (Ro firing the phased Romulan disruptor through Riker while he’s playing the tuba is especially funny), but there’s no real issue exploration going on much.  We just get a scene here or there that suggests Ro trying to wrestle with her Bajoran spiritual beliefs, but we don’t get enough of that for the episode to be about that.  Really, it’s just using technobabble to stick two characters in a jam, then seeing them piece together a technobabble solution that saves the day.

 Apparently, the episode also gets criticised for the phasing concept not resulting in all the affected characters going through the floor.  Clearly, those critics have never read a bloody X-Men comic.  In 1980, Chris Claremont and John Byrne first introduced Marvel readers to one Kitty Pryde, who would eventually develop the code-name of Shadowcat and whose power was the ability to phase through solid matter. However, there were a lot of rules around how that power got used; going through the ground was like going through water and Kitty would have to hold her breath.  If she phased through anything electrical, it got shorted out, and with training Kitty could phase part of herself while keeping the rest solid. Likewise, DC Comics’ speedsters like the Flash have the ability to phase using their speed powers, and again that phasing doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing application.

 Basically, when you apply the power of phasing to a living being, it’s not going to be total and absolute intangibility that the being has zero control over.  Some element of conscious or sub-conscious control to prevent phasing into the Earth’s core or flying off into space must apply as a necessary in-built safety characteristic, or else it wouldn’t be worth having that power.  By the same token, it follows that a phased person on a starship won’t automatically phase through the floor; some part of their mind would resist that and the phasing ability would follow suit, and the only reason this didn’t save the Romulan when La Forge pushes him is that getting pushed in such a manner interfered with that mental process somehow.  The bottom line is the episode makes sense in that regard; what doesn’t make sense is making a Trek episode that’s all technobabble and no substance.  As such, I’m only inclined to give this one 7 out of 10.