#flat white and long black btw

[keytaryourheart]

BABY GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

[nereidprinc3ss]

hii i love love how u write spencer omds🥸

uhh i was wondering if you could write sth based off the song “we’ll never have sex” by leith ross? pls dont feel pressured to write this btw😭😭😭 hope ur having a good day lovely💗💗

hello my love i have no self control so this is extremely long and plotty but i love this song and i hope that this is any good at all crying emoji (i'm on a laptop LOL) enjoy!!

warnings/tags: angst/fluff, fem!reader, negative self-talk from reader, mentions of past sexual coercion/feeling used, mentions of past excessive drinking to combat social anxiety, ive been watching a lot of new girl lately and i think it shows, SO FRIENDS TO LOVERS, happy ending

You weren’t expecting to end up on Spencer Reid’s worn-leather couch at two in the morning, clutching a chipped mug of coffee in your hands as you listen to the sounds of the city from the street below. But there you are, sitting with your legs folded under you, in your favorite dress and first date-night makeup (now bleeding and smudged from all the crying.) And realizing that despite considering him one of your closest friends, you haven’t been to his apartment in a long time. There are, of course, good reasons for that—but you try to push those from your mind. 

“I’m really sorry about this,” you sigh, staring at your warped reflection in the glassy black surface of your coffee. Spencer is coming out of the small kitchen, now bearing his own cup. 

“Please, stop apologizing.” 

You glance up, tentatively studying him from behind the safety of your mug. While he may not have been asleep when you knocked on his door ten minutes ago, lachrymose and barely verbal, he must have been getting ready for bed. He’s clad in patterned pajama pants, mismatched socks, and an FBI crewneck that is just big enough to reveal the collar of the tee-shirt underneath. He’s already taken out his contacts, and you were startled by the reminder that he also has glasses. 

“So...” he begins, bringing you back to the present moment, “we don't have to talk about anything, if you don’t want to, but...” 

You sigh, watching coffee bubbles swirl like stars in a galaxy. 

“It’s fine. Honestly, I’m kind of embarrassed. I didn’t really think, I just... ended up here.” 

“Yeah... where did you come from?” he laughs quietly. “Not that I’m complaining. But I recall you not living super close by.” 

“No, no. I was actually on a date. Kind of.” 

“Ah.” There’s a beat of silence, and ostensibly Spencer is waiting for you to say more, but instead you take a sip from your mug. “At two in the morning?” You nod dully, staring at the labyrinthine pattern of the Persian rug.  

“I’m taking it that it wasn’t a very good date...?” 

A whoosh of air escapes from your puffed cheeks. 

“No it was not. Not by the end, anyway. It actually started really well, which made it even more disappointing when he...” you laugh, but there’s not much humor in it. “Well, when he kicked me out of his car on a street corner because I didn’t want to sleep with him.” 

You don’t look to see Spencer’s reaction—only take another long, baleful sip of coffee and ignore the heavy silence.  

“I’m really sorry. You... you deserve so much better than that.” 

An attempt at a jaded scoff from you falls flat. 

“Yeah, well. Tell that to the last three white house interns I’ve gone on dates with. It’s the same thing every time.” 

“Have you considered going on fewer dates with white house interns...?” The nervous humor is a thin veil over genuine critique. You shrug, biting the inside of your cheek. 

“It’s not just them. Every single guy I’ve liked since I was 15 has been like this. Even my past relationships, I felt like I was almost... tricked into, you know? I mean, these guys, they act all understanding and willing to take it slow or whatever, until you’re in a relationship, and suddenly they’re guilt tripping you so hard and making you feel so obligated to...” you catch yourself just in time, glancing up at Spencer. You’re not sure what to make of his expression. The drawn brow and slightly squinted eyes trained so intently on you could be sympathy, or anger, or pity, or apathy—you look away, not sure you even want to know what he’s thinking. “Sorry. You don’t need to hear all about that. Basically romance is exhausting and since I’ll clearly be single forever I’m considering running away to join a nunnery.” 

When he doesn’t respond for too long, you look back up quizically. 

“I’m not sure you know what romance actually is,” he says as soon as your gaze meets his, like the eye-contact activated some kind of hair-trigger in his vocal box. 

You blink, lowering the coffee cup to your lap. 

Says Spencer Reid? 

“...sorry?” 

He flushes, stammering to clarify himself. 

“I just meant—I—I know I’m not exactly fighting women off with a stick—” he interrupts himself with a self-conscious (adorable) laugh— “but... but I have been in love, at least once.”  

“Maeve,” you say, gently—trying to shove down bitter guilt as you remember how jealous you’d been when Spencer had first told you about her. “I remember.” 

He swallows and nods. 

“We never even met—we just talked. All the time. I had no idea what she looked like. But it didn’t matter at all. Because I knew her, and I loved her. Maybe things would have gone further if I hadn’t been calling her from public phone booths, but that wasn’t the most important thing to either of us. We were still in love.” You try to shut out the sharp ache in your chest. Being jealous of the way he speaks about a dead woman is so wrong.  

“What I’m trying to say is that romance isn’t solely about sex, or even physical appearance. It sounds to me like you’ve been with a lot of men who don’t understand that. And it would be such a shame for you to write romance off in general before you even get to experience it. You are... an extraordinary woman. You’re funny, and intelligent, and kind, and so capable of being loved. One day, someone is going to see beyond your pulchritude and prove that to you. I hope you let them try.” 

More tears blur the pattern on the rug, pooling in the rims of your eyes before spilling down your cheeks in fast, fat drops. Shakily you set the cup down, resting your elbows on your knees and hiding your face in your hands. You sniff once. Twice. Shake your head quickly, attempting to wipe the tears away without further smearing your makeup everywhere. 

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Spencer breathes, leaning forward but obviously unsure how to comfort you. “Please don’t cry, I wasn’t--I was trying to do the opposite of this.” 

“No, I’m sorry! You didn’t have to—you didn’t—I’m sorry. That was way too nice.” 

But you're not crying because he was nice.  

Someone will love you, but not me. That’s all you can hear. 

His voice is a mere whisper when he next speaks. 

“I meant every word.” 

You take a shuddering breath, allowing yourself a moment of reprieve behind the peaceful black of your eyelids. You can’t be looking at his face when you say what you’re about to say. 

“I had a crush on you for the longest time, you know.” 

Ringing silence. But it doesn’t last as long as you’d imagined. It’s not as world ending. 

“Had?” 

The little smile in his voice is like a fist around your heart. 

“Yeah. You know what changed?” 

“What’s that?” 

Absolutely nothing. 

“Every time I got super drunk and started hitting on you, you’d just drive me home. And I did it a lot. Like, for months. But you were such a gentleman. It drove me fucking crazy. So eventually I figured you just didn’t like me and I gave up.” 

Another stretch of silence. A breeze comes in from the open window, fluttering the curtains and cooling the tears on your face. His response is sad when it finally comes. 

“You thought I didn’t like you because I didn’t try to take advantage of you when you were drunk?” 

“Pretty much.” You smile ruefully, fingertips still pressed over your eyes. “God, listen to me. No wonder I get treated like garbage.” 

“Stop. Don’t talk about yourself like that. Did you hear anything I just said?” 

You sniff, looking to the ceiling. 

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. It was really sweet.” 

More silence. 

“But you don’t believe it.” 

A bitter laugh poisons the air around you. 

“I don’t know.  I’m kind of tired of waiting for someone to prove it to me. Just for once, I want someone to be interested in me beyond having sex in the back of their fucking... Range Rover, or whatever. Like, maybe all that stuff you said is true, but there’s no evidence to support it, and I know logically you’re probably right but I can’t help wondering if... if I’m the outlier. Maybe there just isn’t someone for me like that. Maybe I’m just gonna be the sex in the back of the Range Rover girl forever.” 

A noise somewhere between a laugh and a sob forces itself from your throat and you bury your face in your hands again, shaking your head. 

“Wow, I am so sorry,” you say a little too loudly, “I did not mean to be this honest tonight. Did you spike my coffee?” 

“You are not the outlier,” Spencer whispers.  

You sniff, lifting your head haltingly to look at him. 

“What?” 

His voice shakes slightly as he speaks. 

“You said you can’t help wondering if you’re the outlier, and maybe there just isn’t someone for you like that. That’s not true.” 

“Spencer, those are just words. You can’t possibly know that. Statistical probabilities don’t count.” 

“That’s... that’s not how I know.” 

Your heart drops as you study his face.  

No. 

Surely he’s not saying what you think he’s saying. 

Surely he wouldn’t do this to you after you’ve just told him everything you told him. You have been harboring feelings for him for years. Since you met. He can’t just spring this on you one night because you’re a little bummed out. If he felt the same, you would have found out a long time ago; he had ample opportunity to tell you. There was a period of months where you practically threw yourself all over him at every chance you got, and he did nothing. So this... this is just cruel—something you’ve never known Spencer Reid to be. 

You stand up, trembling slightly with rage and grief and humiliation. 

“Don’t do that. Don’t say things that you don’t mean just to make me feel better.” 

“What are you doing? Don’t--” 

You scoop up your purse, trying to get to the front door as fast as your gelatinous legs will allow. More tears are streaming down your face now and you don’t need him to see what he’s done to you—to see how much you care what he thinks. 

“It’s fine. Thanks for the coffee, I’ll see you around—” 

A hand around your wrist stops you in your tracks 

“Stop. Just... please give me a second to talk, okay?” 

With nothing left to give, you turn to him. 

“Don’t be mean, Spencer. Don’t act like you liked me too. That makes me feel... so much worse.” 

He takes a deep, shaky breath, as if steeling himself. Tawny eyes bore into your soul, and you realize that there is so much sheer nervous energy radiating off of him it’s infectious. Your heart begins to pound as he speaks. 

“I’m not doing that. I’m being an idiot, because you just told me that you don’t feel that way about me anymore but... but I do. And I have to tell you now because for six months I tortured myself wondering why you would flirt with me so much when you were hammered and then act like nothing happened the next day. There were so many times I almost told you how I felt but I didn’t and now I am because even if it ruins our friendship you need to know that somebody... that I wanted to be that person for you. I still do.” 

Your heart is like an unmoored zeppelin in your chest, bumping against your esophagus and threatening to either burst or jump out of your mouth. You take your chances, whispering so quietly it’s almost inaudible. 

“You... you like me?” 

“Yes,” Spencer sighs. “I have liked you for a very long time. And I’m sorry—” 

Whatever ridiculous thing he was going to apologize for, you don’t give him the chance. Instead you launch yourself at him, capturing his lips in a kiss that feels so much better than it’d ever been in your fantasies because it’s real. You hear his sharp intake of breath, but it only takes a second for him to respond, cradling your face in his hands like you’re the entire world. For a moment, time bends. Years of longing, of buried dreams crash into the present in a brilliant, dazzling explosion.

And then, as quickly as it started, he pulls away. The absence of his touch is like a vacuum, so much worse now that you know exactly how it feels to have his lips on yours, even if it was only for a few seconds. How the hell did you live like that for so long? How are you supposed to live like that ever again?

“You’re not thinking clearly,” he breathes, tilting his head back toward the ceiling like he’s barely holding onto his self control. “You just want someone to comfort you, I’m not going to take advantage of you when you’re in an emotionally vulnerable state and confided in me which is manufacturing a false sense of attachment—” 

You grab his wrists, which still graze your jaw.

“Spencer, stop intellectualizing for thirty seconds. I promise you I am thinking clearly.” 

“You said you used to like me, past tense—” 

“Yeah, I did. Do you believe every single murderer who says he didn’t do it?” 

“No, but—” 

“Have you ever heard the phrase; a drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts?” 

“Of course I have.” 

“Then what more could you possibly need to be convinced that I really like you? I already kissed you! What is stopping you?” 

Another deep breath is taken by him that seems to suck all the air out of the quiet room. Briefly, you wonder if you’ve made a terrible, terrible mistake. If you really do like him so much more than he could ever like you.  

Until he looks back down, eyes so golden-brown in the dim light, so kind and full of affectionate concern as he carefully assesses every square centimeter of your face, looking for... well, you’re not exactly sure what. It’s like he’s extracting every thought from your head, turning them over like sun-warmed stones until he finds what he’s looking for. He smooths his hands over your hair, brushing strands away from your teary face. Finally, after what feels like an eternity of holding your breath, he speaks. 

“I just want you to believe what I believe about you. But I don’t want you to have to rely on me or anyone else for your own self-worth.” 

“Well, don’t you think very highly of yourself,” you tease with a sniffle. He laughs—it's quiet, but his smile is so bright without even trying that suddenly you can’t remember why you’ve ever been sad. The small miracle of his laughter makes you feel so light, and you realize it has nothing to do with the way he makes you feel about yourself. It has everything to do with who he is. 

Once the giggles die down, you tentatively mirror his hold on your face. 

“Spencer, I don’t like you because you like me. I’ve liked you for an embarrassingly long time. I liked you enough that I gave myself a severe hangover at least once a week for three months just so I could have an excuse to flirt shamelessly with you.” 

A half-sad smile pulls at the corner of his mouth, and he gently swipes under your eyes. 

“You never had to do that. I would have welcomed your sober brazen flirting with open arms.” 

“Well... do you believe me?” you plead. His amber eyes shine. 

“I do.” 

“Will you kiss me?” 

“If that’s what you want.” 

You nod, rising on your toes to meet him halfway. 

When your lips meet again, it is sweet, and honest, and slow, and deep. Still, there is no desperation--no race to an imagined finish line, no clash of teeth and pawing hands. It is a kiss for the sake of it—as if it were the greatest intimacy. Not a precursor to sharing a bed, but something bigger than that in and of its own. Something just as worthy and important. For the first time, you think you’re beginning to understand romance. And while you wouldn’t mind if things did escalate, you also know that Spencer knows that’s not what matters right now. Because he actually understands you—he actually cares. He will wait until you understand that you mean so much more than that to him.

To that end, he pulls away, gently supplanting his absence with a kiss to the corner of your mouth. 

“It would be polite of me to offer you a ride home, wouldn’t it?” he whispers, like it’s the last thing he wants to do. You bite the inside of your cheek, coming up with reasons not to go. One ridiculous one arises from the depths of your memory that you know he won’t be able to say no to. 

“Or... I could stay here, and we could watch one of those nerdy foreign films you’re always talking about?” 

A slow, perfect, high-watt smile blossoms on his face, and you know you’ve said exactly the right thing. 

“Nerdy? Oh, my darling girl... Soviet-era filmography is far from nerdy. небесная машина will completely defy what you thought you knew about the life of an average Russian villager in the 1950’s.” 

“Oh, good. Because I’ve really been meaning to change the way I think about the average 1950’s Russian villager,” you smile, already closing in to kiss him again. 

------------------------------------------ 

epilogue

Three hours later, you’re crying because the life of the average Russian villager in the 1950’s was so much worse than you’d previously thought. 

“It was good, right?” Spencer asks as the credits roll over a bleak snowy sepia landscape, leaning back to get a better look at you. You sit up from where you’d been leaning against him, furiously wiping your eyes. 

“It was terrible! Why didn’t you tell me that everyone except the kid dies in the end?!” 

“Because that’s the whole point of the movie!” he laughs, pulling you back into him. “I’m sorry. I probably should have explained how depressing this entire era of film was outside of the US.” 

“And also how long the movies were. I was not prepared for how many five minute long clips of empty fields there were going to be.” 

“You’re right,” he ammends, wrapping his arms around you in a way that gives you butterflies and makes you sleepy at the same time. “Next time we can watch whatever you want to watch.” 

Time passes like that—you in his arms, watching weak light slowly flood the room with half-lidded eyes and listening to the sounds of the city waking up from the street below, underscoring the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. Thoughts float by like leaves on the ever-flowing current of your mind, and you’re happy to let them pass until one in particular catches your attention. 

“Spencer?” 

He hums, like he’d been deep in his own proverbial river of thought. 

“What does pulchritude mean?” 

It takes him a split second to remember the bit of conversation from earlier to which you are referring, but when he does, he chuckles, running his hand over your messy hair. 

“Don’t worry about it.” 

And so you let it float away. 

[undertheorangetree]

Pomegranate Seeds

Summary- A retelling of the abduction of Persephone.

Warnings- MDNI 18+ NSFW. Female reader. Hades and Persephone AU. Star-crossed lovers vibes. Uncle/niece incest. Making out. Angst. Fluff. Titty sucking. Handjob. Cunnilingus. Vaginal fingering. Soft smut. Mild praise kink. Mildly OOC Aemond.

Author's Notes- Yeah I was a Percy Jackson/Greek mythology kid, thank you for noticing. I'm still playing incredibly fast and loose with the mythology tho so we're gonna have to make our peace with that. This is a beast btw, it's like 9.6K and you can find the rest on AO3 with the link below :)

divider created by @firefly-graphics

It is moments like these, she thinks, that she loves most.

Alone in the meadow, surrounded by wildflowers, the babbling of the creek as it flows over the rocks. Everything green with the exception of the purple, white, and yellow flowerheads but lush and everbearing and alive, the sun little more than a hazy warm glow, not yet hot enough to be overbearing. It is peaceful here, so much more than she is used to. She had come to an agreement with her step sisters, Baela and Rhaena, that they allow her a few hours on her own in this meadow, undisturbed by anyone else. Though her mother much preferred to that she remain alongside her sisters whenever she is out of sight, she, Baela, and Rhaena had come to an agreement that what her mother didn’t know couldn’t hurt her. And besides, they were never too far away from her. Being water nymphs, they could be by her side in less than a moment if she really needed them, so long as she doe does not stray too far from the river. And she has never been more grateful for it than she is right now.

Stretching her arms high above her head, she stretches out along the grass, enjoying the feeling of every blade of grass, the sweet smell of the blooms wafting on the breeze. Admittedly, this meadow had not been quite so plentiful when they had found it, following along the winding river, but she is the goddess of spring. Flowers bloom at her word and sun shines with her will. It had not been too difficult to turn this meadow into her own personal paradise, away from the chaos often wrought by her mother and brothers and stepfather.

There is a sudden change in the wind that causes her to sit up. Colder than it had been before, something more akin to winter than spring. The ground seems to rumble beneath her, shaking as if the sudden cold has sent it to shiver. Curiously, she turns her head toward the tree line, where the birches and willows keep the meadow shielded from view, only to find a man standing among them. Dressed in all black- breeches, cloak, and the shred of his tunic she can see beneath it- his platinum hair is almost jarring in contrast. He is not a big man, long and lithe, but there is an air to him that feels dangerous, dangerous enough to give her pause. He has not noticed her yet, face turned away, but she can see the long, stern plains of his face from where she sits, looking incredibly serious. That seriousness is only exacerbated by the dark leather eyepatch covering the eye closest to her, a deep red scar carved beneath it.

She does not think she has ever seen anyone here before, not outside of Baela, Rhaena, and herself, and his presence here is almost incongruous. Still, there is an air about him, one that makes it clear that he is a god just as she is, and that alone should make his surprise appearance less shocking.

“Hello.”

The sound of her voice seems to catch him off guard. Quickly, he turns toward her, shoulders tense, but they relax when he takes her in. She cannot imagine that she is intimidating, sitting flat in the grass all alone. “Hello.”

But it is that reminder of the grass that brings her pause. What is this man doing here? Where had he come from? It is not as if this meadow is easy to find, hidden amongst the trees as it is. She feels her brows furrow, head cocking in question. “How did you find this place?”

She had not put a glamour over this meadow, but she did not feel she had too. The forest, though light and airy, was a labyrinth of trees that seemed deterrent enough to keep any unwanted guests away. They were incredibly difficult to find your way through and she had been convinced it would be impossible to try- for God or mortal.

Near impossible, it seemed then.

His eye darts back to the treeline, taking half a step back. “If I am intruding, I can leave.”

“No.” She says it far too quickly and she can see the way his eyebrows raise in response to it, but she can’t find it in her to be ashamed. She is intrigued by this man, more so than she likely should be, and finds she wants to know more. To learn how he came to find this place. “Just because this place is unknown does not mean it is mine alone. You may stay. Beauty like this should be enjoyed.”

“Wise words,” he agrees, coming toward her. He hesitates at the end, torn on whether or not to truly join her, but it seems courtesy wins out as he lowers himself to the ground, joining her amongst the flowers. He looks entirely out of place, black against the blooms, but she says nothing, keeping her observation to herself.

They sit in absolute silence but she does not mind. He sits stiffly, as if uncomfortable, while she continues to take in all that is around her. From here, she can see the way the willows sway with the wind, the white puffy clouds floating by in the soft blue sky.

“I did not mean to,” he says. She looks at him, head tilted once again. “To find this place. It was not my intention. Though I admit I have never seen anything quite like it.”

She smiles, though he could not possibly know that he had complimented her. “It is a rare thing.”

“It feels almost as if it were from a painting,” he adds, looking around the meadow to take it in further.

She joins him in it, finding no shame in admiring her own work. It is a pretty place, though that had always been her intention. Olympus was beautiful in and of itself, but it was stark in that way. Ethereal and otherworldly, but cosmopolitan. Bright white marble, painted statues, stained glass. Everything beautiful, to be sure, but not in the untamed way that she seemed to crave. She preferred the beauty that was found in nature, in heavy branches filled with green leaves, tall grasses and wildflowers and crystalline waters.

“Do you know much about art?” she asks to fill the silence.

He seems caught off guard again from her question, but answers it anyway. “Not as much as I would like, but I can appreciate the beauty in something as well as any man. Though do not tell anyone. It would ruin my reputation.”

She laughs. “You needn’t worry. Your secret is safe with me. Which periods do you prefer?”

They talk for hours, the conversation unfurling as naturally as a bird’s wing. Art, history, philosophy. There is no subject they do not indulge in. He becomes less awkward with time as he grows more comfortable around her and she almost pulls a laugh from him not once, but twice. It seems quite the feat, for a man as serious as this one seems to be, though she does not let her pride get the better of her. When she asks him how she managed to find her well kept secret, he had simply said that one always finds the best things when you are not looking for them. A non answer, but that was alright. She was sure she could coax the answer from him eventually.

“Forgive me, I never asked you your name,” she says after what must have been hours, half appalled by her lack of manners.

He does not seem to mind, a good natured half smile making its way onto his face. “My friends call me Aemond. You may as well.”

It is not uncommon, for Gods to prefer more earthly names. She is often the same. There is power within a name and for such an innocent encounter, she does not feel the need to have him call her Persephone or Kore or any of those that strike some rumination of power and fear. So she gives him her common name, the one she feels is more true to who she is, and he smiles in response to it, repeating it back to her as if to test it. She likes the way it sounds when he says it, the way each letter seems to roll off him tongue, and somehow hearing him say the word alone is enough to make her flush.

She turns her head to hide it and only then notices that the sun has dipped below the trees, leaving the sky a hazy orange. Her mother will be expecting her home soon and there is no telling how poorly she will react if Rhaena and Baela return home without her. She doesn’t doubt that Rhaenyra will send her great serpent Syrax after her should she be even a moment late.

“I have to go,” she says, unable to keep the apologetic tone from her voice.

Reluctantly, she stands, brushing the dirt from her skirts. His lips had parted at her announcement, but now he ducks his head in an understanding nod. She smiles at him, not truly wanting to go yet, and makes her way toward the creek to call upon her sisters to come and fetch her. She does not make it two steps before he is calling after her.

“Can I see you again?”

She turns back to look at him. The insecurity on his face does not seem to match his features, looking almost out of place there. Still, she finds it entirely endearing and she realizes that she would absolutely like to see him again.

“Yes,” she agrees softly.

“Tomorrow?”

She does not bother to fight the smile itching its way onto her face. “Yes.”

He matches her smile then before standing. He comes forward and takes her hand, bringing her knuckles to his lips and placing a chaste kiss there. “Then I shall see you on the morrow, my lady.”

She can do nothing but hope he does not notice how hot her face has become.

“On the morrow.”

Read the rest here

[carlyraejepsans]

UTY!Flowey, "lore" and how to criticize a fan prequel without being an insufferable pedantic, a guide by Biscia.

(for my muskless fellows, here's a transcript of my thread on Undertale Yellow that I posted on Twitter. enjoy!)

There's this really frustrating attitude in fan spaces i like to call "lorepilling" where people are substantially more concerned with encyclopedic knowledge of details & minutiae (so called "lore") in place of full-text thematic/narrative analysis as if the two are mutually interchangeable.

It's especially common in large franchises and story heavy videogames, and it's like... Are You Treating This Piece Of Art Like A Trivia Battle Or Are You Treating It Like A Story

This is coming from a person who is also deeply autistic about UTDR trivia btw, I'm just saying that when it comes to transformative *stories*, depending on the impact it has on character, themes, and narrative structure... lore is expendable.

Ultimately this is why most of the UTY criticism i see (on twitter specifically) falls flat. What does it matter if "lore" means Flowey couldn't chronologically be there when the justice human fell, as long as the game narratively justified his presence in the story in a compelling way?

The real criticism, in the end, is that it didn't.

He's a plot central, main cast character from the canon returning in a cast of mostly OCs and what does he have to show for it? An admittedly sick boss battle in 1/3 endings, sure but... not much else. He has no significant "presence" in the story, no tie, interaction, or even just... an opinion on the rest of the cast. Which is a huge miss when Flowey's meta role is to be Thee completionist player mirror. He's the OG lorepilled UT fan! He's an opinionated little shit!

This isn't to say that UTY *didn't* engage w/ his metanarrative. When me and @a-town-called-hometown first started playing the game (we were both skeptical of Flowey's inclusion), he immediately said "It would be really cool if they made it so this has been going on for a while and Clover has no idea". Which is precisely what the game did in the neutral ending, and what I will openly say was the most well written & well executed part of this game's story...

...a part we almost didn't see, because the pacifist ending disappointed us so much we lost all will to replay.

To put it in the words of my friend Mel @clowwwnbytes, there's a deafening hollowness to UTY Flowey's motivations & core principles where his guilt towards Chara—and resulting black and white thinking—should be. You're telling me Mr Kill-or-be-killed, "sacrificing yourself to do the right thing is stupid", would stand there after 1000s of failed attempts to make Clover survive, look on as they make the same mistake Asriel he did, and fondly call them friend? Cue the guitar, roll the credits?

He would lose it. Oh my god he would lose his goddamn mind, he would throw the nastiest temper tantrum in the world. Are you serious? How dare you. How DARE you. All this effort, all my patience, and you just let yourself DIE for a few worthless idiots? I should've let you ROT!

*clears throat* sorry got a bit too into character. as i was saying.

I can understand a UT prequel wanting to distance itself from the canon Chara storyline in order to form its own identity, but then turning around and choosing Insane About Chara The Character™ for a sidekick is... far from optimal. In the end, Flowey comes across as underutilized and inconsistent, with a whole lot of wasted potential.

This is an issue I have with UTY's character writing (original AND returning) and story structure as a whole. Lots of inconsistent character arcs, tonal dissonance, overuse of situational sadness... it's an amateurish work, after all, and you can feel it. There's no shame in that.

(Though, there ARE some issues that i take more seriously with its writing, especially when it comes to its two main female characters—Ceroba's lack of narrative agency and depth borders on misogynistic writing imo. But that's a topic for another day)

Over all, UTY was an incredible piece of collaborative transformative work, with gorgeous art and a genuinely incredible OST, which... would have benefited from more experienced writers. But hey, you can only ever learn by trying!

For all it could've been a better story, it certainly did not fail to entertain: both when my friend was playing it, and after in our many discussions of its writing, its faults and how it could've been improved (royal scientist!ceroba character fix you will always be famous. to ME!)

I'm sure this project served as an incredible source of experience for the developers: as individual creators AND as a team. I look forward to their future projects!

but also if i have to see another person say UTY is better than Undertale i might turn into The Jonker.

end of the essay! really couldn't stand any of the pedantic ""criticism"" I'd seen of this fangame so far, so i had to say my piece as someone more versed in analysis. happy to elaborate on anything in the replies or in my inbox!

[runa-falls]

can you do “did i say that out loud?” with marc

congrats on your milestone btw!!

summary: marc sees you all dressed up for once.

a/n: thanks for sending this in!

marc | jake | steven

---

marc huffs as he fixes his tie for the fifth time, glaring at himself in the mirror. khonshu and sekhmet have the two of you attending a gala because apparently, there's a rich asshole who needs to be taught a lesson.

he doesn't understand why the gods are insisting on the aristocratic party when they could just catch him at his mansion or in a nearby alley.

he steps back, scanning over his appearance. his suit fits awkwardly.

he doesn't own one himself, so he had to choose between steven's ill-fitting professor-esque set or jake's playboy black-on-black tux. they were both shoved to the back of the closet, for obvious reasons, and of course, marc didn't think to check for an outfit until the night of.

marc grumbles as he adjusts the tight crotch, cursing jake's haughty fashion choices. at least he was able to find a white undershirt so he doesn't look like a complete asshole at this thing. he needs to blend in, not make a scene by flashing his tightly covered bulge...

lifting his left wrist, he checks the time. 6:10. you should be here soon.

he looks back at the mirror, running his fingers through his hair to keep his curls nice and neat.

"relax, you look good."

jake.

his day of silence didn't last as long as he hoped.

"didn't ask." marc walks over to the entrance of the flat where his nice shoes sit. god, those are going to be a pain to fight in...

"c'mon markie, you've been getting ready for an hour and a half...that's longer than stevie during his self-care days!"

"hey! saturdays are important for keeping our curls healthy and reseting our skin's ph for the upcoming work week!"

"what i'm trying to say is that our brother is desperate to get all prettied up for his warrior girlfriend."

"she's not my girlfriend."

"oh right, i forgot, you 'hate' her." the sarcasm is so loud as jake's words bounce in his head. "you're acting like we're not sitting front row to your longing stares"

"whatever. i'm just trying to look rich and put together since i'm going to be in a crowd of billionaires." before jake could make another quip, there's a knock at the door.

marc finishes slipping on the shoes and opens the door.

his eyes nearly bug out of his head. there you stand in a floor length gown that perfectly hugs your body without being overly tight. he's never seen you like this, all dressed up, it's completely different from you're usual battle armor that makes you look fierce and cunning. you look softer...beautiful.

"marc?" you've been standing there for about a minute, waiting for him to invite you in for a drink before you leave, but he's just been standing there, staring at you like you're a hippo that has escaped the london zoo.

he looks handsome with hair pushed back and a hint of stubble on his face. the fitted tux accentuates his muscled figure, especially his biceps as he holds the door open for you.

"damn..."

you suppress a blush and just offer him an amused look.

"not so bad yourself, spector."

"shit, did i say that out loud?"

"didn't realize you had the hots for me like that...is that why you're always an asshole to me?"

he rolls his eyes playfully, "no. i'm just an asshole because you're an annoying brat."

he opens the door further and steps out of the way to let you into the flat, and somehow, you still brush against him as you enter.

"...an annoying brat that you like~" you whisper teasingly.

"shut up."

[ildarotyrannus]

I apologize for such a long delay. I couldn't find the motivation to keep posting here. But, as I promised in my last post, here are three more drawings made for last year's scientific conference. :)

Front half of Dakosaurus andiniensis, massive metriorhynchid from Late Jurassic of Argentina. As with Cricosaurus, I based this reconstruction on metriorhynchid specimens with skin. Note the presence of speculative skin parasites, whose marks were founds in fossil skin. Also, there are salt glands in antorbital fenestra. This feature is based on this study: https://anatomypubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/ar.24678 BTW, some recons portray Dakosaurus with crocodile-like facial integument and some recons even have "lips"! I decided to diversify from these both options and did it with smooth streamlined skin.

Prognathodon sp. reconstruction based on purportedly juvenile specimen with soft tissue outlines from Late Cretaceous of Jordan. This small individual was described in this paper: https://www.nature.com/articles/ncomms3423 Preserved skin impressions include silhouettes of the skin fringes of the flippers and the caudal fin. The caudal fin is quite small, but in adults it could be proportionally larger. This finding confirmed that mosasaurs converged with ichthyosaurs and metriorhynchids to develop a fish-like caudal fin.

And finally, Seeleyosaurus guilelmiimperatoris (formerly species of Plesiosaurus), a microcleidid plesiosaur from Early Jurassic of Germany. Holotype of this species is almost complete specimens with some skin impressions including rhomboidal skin flap. Perhaps all plesiosaurs had caudal fins of one form or another. However, their orientation is controversial: many paleontologists are of the opinion that the fin was vertical, but others think it was horizontal.The arguments in favor of the second point of view are the rigidity of the chest, the flat and wide shape of the tail in the proximal part and the absence of bending in the distal part of the tail: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/339423536_Peculiarities_of_the_Structure_and_Locomotor_Function_of_the_Tail_in_Sauropterygia I decided to choose this version for reconstruction. Which of the scientists is closer to the truth, new findings will show. All of these drawings were done with black gel ink pen and black colored pencil with small additions of white gouache.

[kyotakumrau]

2023.11.06 DIR EN GREY at CLUB CITTA

The beginning of the ending as Kaoru said.

The doors opened at 18:00, the start of the show was scheduled for 19:00.

The final sound check started 18:58 so it was certain the show won't start on time xD they were 14 mins late xD

The animated intro A book titled Phalaris opens and for a brief moment we see the text on the first page. Phalaris was always renowned as extremely cruel. (googling the sentence took me to Wikipedia, they actually simply copied the Wikipedia entry about Phalaris xD) In the intro Phalaris is portrayed as a parasite, changing it's forms one by one, from a larvae to an insect to a monster to a dragon to a brass bull, changing its hosts into something evil until they infect the next victims. The parasite growing inside their bodies into something grotesque and transforming them. A set of dice next to the book. Priests and prayers mixed with torture and dying girls, women. Is Phalaris a sickness of cruelty and hatred causing people lose their humanity? The members walked on the stage as the intro footage was shown on the front screen. They played Otogi as the images continued on the screen. The screen went down as Otogi ended.

Die had his fabulous hair and a black jacket with red stains. Shinya wore white shirt with silver decorations. Toshiya had a sparkly jacket with one sleeve only, shorts and long leather boots. Kaoru's hair was silver? grey? He had some kind od painting on his face but from my place I couldn't see properly what was it, like lines over his cheeks and forehead? (apparently he cosplayed Father Pucchi from Jojo😆) Kyo came wearing a black Adidas tracksuit, he removed the jacket a bit later on, staying in a white cotton tank top. He's growing a mustache or a goatee I think? His hair was parted and sleeked back a bit, not so much hair product to make it flat.

The set list was so interesting. The energy went up with the few following songs, then Oboro shifted the mood and finished with the Inward Scream. The sound/musical part of the inward scream was new. Kyo ended it with '壊れて・broken' cried softly. And after a brief pause they continued the set with The World of Mercy. The first line of 誰が知る？本当の私 本当の心 Kyo changed 'kokoro' to '意思・ishi' (intentions).

During Rinkaku's 'Minerva' we got to shout for him as he turned with his arms stretched to the sides.

The following flow with 13, keigaku, different sense and Eddie was so good! Kyo moved around his box to get fans to let go even more and give him more😁

The main set ended with Kyo leaving quickly. Fans were clapping and shouting encore. Btw we had to wear masks for this show but singing and shouting was allowed (so hot with a mask on😂)

Encore started with Increase Blue, very nice as Kyo got us singing and dancing. But when I heard the first notes of NATIONAL MEDIA BOYS I almost cried. I hoped they will do something as a tribute and they did😢❤️ Interestingly a lot of people didn't recognize the song and thought it was a new dir's song😂

TDFF and Rubbish Heap were pure 🔥 Toshiya climbed to the back of the stage so he stood at the bottom of the back screen, showing off his looooong leather boots and shorts.

Finishing with Kamui changed the mood drastically though. The footage matching the style of the intro started on the back screen. Some images of the war they used before but the main theme was different. A girl standing inside the sinking boat, the sea being so angry. Small group of people walking through a desert. A praying jew. A bible. A cross. A closeup of the chest of Christ, a trail of blood and next to it a trail of tears. So much death.

The footage ended with the tour title on the black background.

Kyo left very quickly after the song ended (usual for him, especially at the start of the tour). But Shinya did as well? Did I miss him throwing stuff or he really didn't? Die and Toshiya walked around the stage throwing picks, all smiley. Kaoru stayed the longest having fun spraying fans with water, then throwing those bottles into the crowd. I bet he was in the celebrating mood with Hanshin Tigers winning Japan Series. Before Kaoru left he pointed at the screen in the back to show there will be some announcements, waved and left :)

First we got 19990120 and then the special January tour info. We tried briefly for the second encore but the staff insistingly kept announcing that the performance is over so we clapped one last time and it was over.

[paperhats-and-evil-schemes]

Lovestarved (Rewrite)

Flug couldn’t believe it. Defying all of his expectations, Black Hat actually prevented him from hurting his friends. Not only that, but kept his secret from being exposed. He had been so certain that the eldritch wanted [...], but now, with every manipulative and cruel assumption Flug had made being tossed out the window, he had no idea what to think anymore. When he next spoke, his voice was but a meek stutter. “Th-Thank you, sir...” “’Thank you’?” Black Hat repeated, a ghostly twitch of annoyance betraying his smile for just a moment. “What have I told you, Flug? Your… gratitude…” That last word was uttered with notable disgust, “… is gravely misplaced. I only—“ He was stunned into silence when Flug unexpectedly clutched his hand. “You stopped me from hurting them.” The scientist spoke more firmly in spite of how his own hands trembled. Flug dared not make eye contact, instead staring directly at the floor. “Thank you.” He had almost expected to get lashed out at or shouted at for grabbing Black Hat so suddenly, and when he realized his mistake, he immediately let go… but Black Hat did neither of those things. He just stared, expression completely blank to the point of almost being comical, at where Flug had touched him. That doesn’t happen. People don’t touch him. He touches people. On his terms. After the initial confusion wore off, his cold and calculative eyes pierced right through Flug. “… Well.” He finally spoke, flat-toned, “You can thank me by getting rid of those pests outside.”

Okay look I know the White Hat fic’s been a long time coming and I’m definitely still working on it, but oh my god the complete and utter abomination that was the original Lovestarved fic was driving me completely insane, I HAD to give it a revamp for my own peace of mind lmfao, my GOD, IT WAS SO BAD YOU GUYS IDC WHAT YOU SAY I'M SORRY SZTEFA BUT YOU'RE W R O N G LMAO

So anyway, have the not-perfect-but-still-very-much-improved fanfic of a Monster!Flug x BH slowburn in which these idiots keep idioting around each other 24/7 until things happen lol (Btw one of my mutuals recently got instabanned for merely mentioning a certain phrase, so since I’m not sure how tumblr is deciding to auto-flag posts and I don’t wanna go through the headache of having to get my account reactivated again, this post is only the first half of the fic (the safe portion lol) and then there’ll be a link to the AO3 version at the bottom of this post for when things start to get on the risqué side.)

And of course, this fic series is based on this wonderful fic right here!

Previous works in chronological order: Hired, Don’t Try to Run, Lovestarved, Trial & Trust, Deeper Than Skin, A Small Solace, In Sickness and in Health, Benefit of the Doubt, Just Another Word I Never Learned to Pronounce, Merry (Late) Christmas, Compromise

Flug had never intended for this to happen.

Never in a million years had he planned on revealing this part of him to anybody , let alone Black Hat himself. Sadly, it’s not easy to sweep the unfortunate incident of devouring a test subject right in front of him under the rug. Then again, given his boss’s nature of being able to slip into any room unnoticed, perhaps Flug should’ve prepared for such an inevitable possibility. 

Oh well. Too little, too late, as some might say. At least Black Hat hadn’t reacted as negatively as Flug thought he might. On the contrary, in fact, Black Hat seemed to find Flug��s otherworldly nature quite amusing. Yet another reaction that his scientist perhaps should’ve expected to some extent. 

What he never could’ve expected was the change in attitude, however.

Yes, ever since that day, Black Hat had been treating him differently. It was subtle enough that any bystander likely wouldn’t notice a difference in their relationship. But Flug definitely took notice, especially in how his superior spoke to him.

He was still his usual brash, hostile self, but every once in a while, sprinkled in between whatever myriad of scathing remarks and scoldings Flug would face on any given day (and even those had lessened significantly), Black Hat would sometimes praise him. The first time Flug heard the words “Good work” out of his boss’s mouth, he thought he’d been hallucinating, as that explanation seemed far more likely.

Furthermore, Black Hat continued to surprise Flug by not broadcasting his secret to the rest of the household. He’d been certain that his boss would’ve gotten a kick out of airing his dirty laundry for everyone to see, if only for the sole reason that Flug gravely didn’t want that. Yet, Black Hat held back. Didn’t speak a word about it to 5.0.5. or Demencia. Not that Flug would risk getting too comfortable in that regard, of course. Whatever Black Hat’s motivations may have been, it definitely wasn’t coming out of a place of respect for Flug’s privacy. Knowing his boss, he was probably just waiting for either of their housemates to walk in on him devouring someone so he could indulge in whatever chaos might unfold. Or perhaps there was some other reason that Flug hadn’t considered. He certainly knew better than to try and guess what Black Hat was thinking, regardless.

Not all of the changes in Black Hat’s behavior were so positive, though. For one thing, his unnerving fascination with Flug’s souleater half has led to some rather uncomfortable arrangements. On the one hand, Black Hat providing him with prey saves Flug the trouble of having to sneak around anymore to feed himself, but on the other, his boss had a peculiarly keen interest in watching him eat. That was already bad enough, having to put what Flug had tried so hard to keep hidden all his life on full display like that, but it was made even worse by how handsy Black Hat would sometimes get afterwards.

He had a particular fascination with Flug’s teeth. Whether or not that was out of some twisted sense of humor or out of a genuine curiosity of Flug’s species, the doctor couldn’t tell. All he knew is that it was uncomfortable. Every time those hands crinkled up the edges of that paper bag to expose his bloodied mouth, anxiety spiked within him at the mere thought of his mask being pulled off completely. Luckily for Flug, Black Hat never went that far, for the time being. 

“Why do you always do that…?” He had asked once, during one upon too many fang inspections to count.

There was a click of the tongue, Black Hat tilting Flug’s chin whichever way he wanted, as he gave his unconventional answer. “The soul residue intrigues me. Besides, it's the only part of your face I’ve seen thus far. I like to admire it at its bloodiest.” Then he’d flash one of his many shit-eating grins. “Given how long you’ve hidden this from me, I certainly have the right to catch up on what I’ve been missing.”

What could he possibly have been “missing”? He knew Black Hat to enjoy displays of violence the most when they had some heart in them. Flug’s only ever been timid and reluctant in the way that he feeds, unable to understand what entertainment value Black Hat could possibly be getting out of such mediocre murders.

On one particular day, however, the situation differed.

Their domain had fallen under siege by a particularly persistent team of heroes… It would’ve been an all-out attack if Dr. Flug hadn’t activated an emergency forcefield just in time. But for now, all they could do was wait these heroes out until they came up with a proper plan of retaliation. Their anti-hero merchandise was the best there was, of course, but with the sheer amount of opponents waiting outside, the villains were put in a particularly tricky situation. 

Black Hat could easily dispose of the problem, Flug knew for a fact. These heroes were mere ants to somebody with his unimaginable power. But, in typical Black Hat fashion, he chose to instead put this job on Flug and Demencia. 

While Flug could understand to some extent that such matters were too trivial and boring for his boss to face head-on, he had hoped the demon would’ve made an exception in this case. This situation had cut Flug, Demencia, and 5.0.5. off from the outside world until they could find a way around those heroes, which wouldn’t be a problem if not for the fact that it left Flug without sustenance to keep his monstrous half in check.

Unfortunately for him, Black Hat found more interest in watching how his employees would tackle the problem instead. Because, for him, the slightly-more-interesting route would always be preferred over the easy way out. It’s not like the health of his underlings has ever held priority over his own amusement, so Flug had no right to be surprised. He’d just have to persevere, and he wouldn’t dare complain about his hunger to Black Hat himself. Knowing him, he’d expect Flug to earn his food under these circumstances. The way Black Hat was constantly hanging around the laboratory as he worked further cemented that idea into his mind. 

Instead, he threw himself into his work as if that were an adequate distraction. He did everything he could to keep his mind busy, to keep himself distracted from anything that may lead to one of his episodes, but it was so damn hard when these hunger swings can be so unpredictable. One minute, he would be completely fine, but the next…

“Whatcha workin’ on, doc?”

Hunger making him more irritable than usual, the mere sound of Demencia’s voice had been enough to grate on his nerves these past weeks of siege. It was bad enough that his cravings were already slowing him down far too much, he didn’t need Dem’s constant pestering on top of his current inability to focus. 

Shaking those concerns out of his head, he was none too kind when he answered her. “Oh, I don’t know, Demencia, maybe a solution to our little problem out there?”

Unfazed by the mockery dripping from his voice, her desire for mischief was left perfectly intact. “Oooo, is it cool? Will it blow ‘em up? Liquidize their insides? Lemme see it!” 

She jumped for the flask, and Flug had barely enough reaction time within him to dodge her. “ Stop that! Do you want to get a cloud of knockout gas to the face!?” Flug barked, scrambling to keep his work from falling out of his hands. Once stabilized, he shot her a nasty glare. “Don’t you have anything better to do than bother me?”

“You’re kidding, right?” She deadpanned in response. Dramatically flopping into a nearby chair, Demencia kept up her annoying lamenting. “We’ve been stuck with those dumb heroes outside for like a week, I’m boooored.”

“Well good for you, but since I’m the only one around here that seems willing to fix this damn mess, I need to focus.” Flug snapped at her, voice raising alongside his frustration, “What I don’t need is some brain-dead halfwit breathing stupid questions down my neck the whole time!”

Demencia’s eyebrows shot up in surprise at how intensely he came off. Sure, she could get on his nerves with relative ease, but he usually took it with more grace than that, even at times when he’d sic Hatbots on her. Even Black Hat glanced up from his newspaper upon hearing such unusual hostility growing in Flug, though he reserved comment. 

“Ouch,” Demencia remarked, although not especially offended. “Well, sorry Mr. Grumpypants, didn’t realize you were in such a mood today.” She chided him. “You skip your coffee this morning or what?”

Narrowed eyes shot one last dirty look at her before Flug tried to shift his focus back to his concoction at the lab table. Key word being tried , because before he knew it, he was doubling over from pain when his cravings hit him full-force. He was barely able to catch himself against the table, almost knocking over the work he’d previously scolded Demencia for endangering. 

Serving up a confused stare, Demencia frowned at him. “Uhh, Flug?”

The ruckus also woke 5.0.5. who’d been sleeping nearby, a worried grunt coming from him as he wandered over to see what was going on.

What Flug had feared all along was now fast approaching. This sort of thing was exactly what Black Hat wanted, wasn’t it? For him to expose himself to the others in as violent a manner as possible? And if so, then where the fuck was he? Flug could’ve sworn he was in the room a second ago, and hell, maybe he was too disoriented to know for sure, but he couldn’t see the demon anywhere. 

All he could lock his starving gaze onto was Demencia and 5.0.5., the clueless pair coming foolishly closer to check on him. They’d make easy targets. They were practically offering themselves up on a silver platter. How could Flug possibly refuse the instincts that were screaming at him to eat?

“Okay, Flug, this is weird, even for you.” 

For the briefest of moments, he saw his mother, so stupidly drawing nearer in his state of delirium. She should have known better. She made herself too easy of an antidote to his suffering. The exact same mistake that Demencia was making now.

He wished he could tell her to get away. He wanted desperately to warn her of what danger she was in. But he couldn’t speak. He couldn’t stop himself from inching his starving body nearer, itching to dig his teeth into something –

“Demencia, step aside.” Black Hat’s familiar voice ordered from the doorway, yielding immediate compliance from her. With adept swiftness, he strode over to the unhinged doctor and proceeded to drag him away from his coworkers before any damage could be done, exiting the laboratory with Flug in tow, and leaving Demencia and 5.0.5. to their own confusion.

Black Hat dragged him through hallways and corridors, paying no mind to his scientist’s resistance. Flug’s thrashing wasn’t particularly troublesome for Black Hat, although he felt mild surprise to experience a jolt of pain inflicted by Flug’s fangs when they tried to find nourishment in the tendrils that restrained him. Judging from the retching and gagging that followed, Black Hat’s soulless form wasn’t exactly fine dining to him. 

They entered a darkened storage room, the only light source coming from a flickering bulb above that fought to stay lit. Within, there laid a hero, injured and bound in place by whatever impromptu restraints Black Hat could find in the moment. 

“Eat.” Black Hat ordered as he shoved Flug towards the helpless fool.

As if Flug needed any convincing. 

The second he was released from Black Hat’s grip, he lunged for the hero, tearing into him with such ruthless ferocity, ripping flesh out in bloody chunks that were strewn across the room with great fervor. The crackling and snapping of bones that’d dared get in the way of Flug’s relentless fangs was like music to Black Hat’s ears. The only way this could’ve been better was if the hero had remained alive long enough to scream.

Out of breath by the time Flug was through with him, it took almost a full minute for him to regain his composure. 

“My my, what a savage display.” Black Hat purred in amusement, drawing nearer to admire the carnage. “You’ve been holding out on me, doctor.”

“W-Wha… Wait, th-this is a hero f-from outs-side, isn’t it…?” Flug queried as he came back to his senses, casting a hesitant glance his boss’s way.

“They make for easy pickings. You looked like you needed something rather immediate.” Black Hat replied, wiping bloodied claws off on his clothes. With a disapproving quirk of the brow, he added, “You could have said something sooner , by the way. It’s not like I knew where your breaking point was.”

Flug couldn’t believe it. Defying all of his expectations, Black Hat actually prevented him from hurting his friends. Not only that, but kept his secret from being exposed. He had been so certain that the eldritch wanted the drama and chaos that would’ve come with him attacking 5.0.5. or Demencia, but now, with every manipulative and cruel assumption Flug had made being tossed out the window, he had no idea what to think anymore. When he next spoke, his voice was but a meek stutter. “Th-Thank you, sir...”

“’ Thank you ’?” Black Hat repeated, a ghostly twitch of annoyance betraying his smile for just a moment. “We have been over this, doctor. Your… gratitude …” That last word was uttered with notable disgust, “… is gravely misplaced. I only—“

He was stunned into silence when Flug unexpectedly clutched his hand. “You stopped me from hurting them.” The scientist spoke more firmly in spite of how his own hands trembled against Black’s. Flug dared not make eye contact, instead staring directly at the floor. “ Thank you. ”

He had almost expected to get lashed out at or shouted at for grabbing Black Hat so suddenly, and when he realized his mistake, he immediately let go… but Black Hat did neither of those things. He just stared, expression completely blank to the point of almost being comical, at where Flug had touched him. That doesn’t happen. People don’t touch him. He touches people. On his terms.

After the initial confusion wore off, his cold and calculative eyes pierced right through Flug. “… Well.” He finally spoke, his voice flat and rigid, “You can thank me by getting rid of those pests outside.” 

With that, the demon took his leave. Flug watched him go, blinking slowly as he tried to process what just happened…

… No. He can think about this later. For now, he had an order to carry out.

After cleaning himself up and changing out of his bloodsoaked clothes, Flug returned to the lab with newfound energy and determination. He threw himself at his experiment with ultimate focus, not allowing Demencia or even Black Hat’s presence distract him, despite how intently the latter was watching him.

Flug completed the substance within the hour, and it did not disappoint. Everything went according to plan. Firing the gas bomb at their intruders did the trick, knocking them out just long enough for Demencia to dispose of them without a single issue. 

When all was said and done, Black Hat approached the doctor from behind as he disarmed the forcefield, causing him to jump in surprise when the demon patted his shoulder. “Well done, doctor.” He said simply before walking off.

All Flug could do was stare as he left, completely befuddled. 

He had always craved Black Hat’s praise, but now that he’d been getting it, it felt beyond impossible to get used to.

The strange behavior, the way he kept lingering about the lab for no discernable reason other than to watch him, how he’d been keeping Flug’s diet in check, it was all just so… bizarre. Flug racked his brain day in and day out trying to solve this mystery, but nothing ever felt like it made sense. It couldn’t be coming from a place of respect, as he knew Black Hat was incapable of respecting him. He doubted it was coming from a place of any sort of concern, as nothing about their routine had actually changed. If anything, Flug was more healthy than usual these days due to Black Hat’s assistance in keeping him properly fed.

Perhaps it was something more akin to keeping a pet. Of course, that must be it. Black Hat likely had him lumped in the same category as Lil Jack these days, just a pet to feed and maintain.

While that dehumanizing assumption made the most sense so far, Flug still couldn’t be sure…

One day, curiosity finally got the better of him. He knew he should know better than to question Black Hat, but he just couldn’t help himself this time.

It was on another day that, as was becoming usual, Black Hat had joined him in the laboratory, overseeing his work from a distance. Flug couldn’t actually be sure how much Black Hat was actually paying attention to the invention he was building, but he worked as diligently as he could under his boss’s silent supervision all the same.

A handray of sorts laid in pieces on the table while the doctor fiddled a screwdriver inside the mechanism. Black Hat had taken to leaning against the wall by the door, not a word spoken by him this whole time.

Flug nervously glanced back at him for a moment, quickly averting his eyes back to the device when he was caught staring. Finally, he forced himself to say it. “… Y-You’ve been… a-acting strangely since you first saw me feed, sir…”

“Strangely?” Black Hat’s cold voice repeated, examining his claws without a care in the world. “What are you implying?”

That ice, that frosty and bitter manner in which his boss spoke, had always rattled Flug’s nerves. It was almost enough to discourage him entirely from completing his train of thought, but he knew that would likely annoy Black Hat even more. He put his screwdriver down, turning to face the demon. “W-w-well, it’s, u-um… er…”

“Out with it, doctor.” Black Hat snapped impatiently. He cast the other man a challenging stare, as though daring him to say something he’ll regret.

At this, Flug hesitated. A lump had started forming in his throat, preventing him from speaking. Black Hat’s glare was definitely making the doctor have second thoughts about saying anything at all. Swallowing hard, he forced himself to speak through his discomfort. “Y-You’ve been treating me differently.”

Black Hat’s visible eye slowly narrowed, but he decided to amuse his doctor. “Oh really? How so?” He said in a sort of sarcastic, dry tone, taking a step forward.

No backing down now. Straightening his back, Flug tried very hard not to flinch away at his boss’s advances. “Well…” He began, fiddling with his hands, “You’ve been, um… H-How do I put this… nicer …?”

That was a big mistake the moment he said it, Flug’s eyes going wide once he realized his mistake far too late. Rage flashed across Black Hat’s face, the demon’s familiar growl ringing through Flug’s ears as he came closer. Flinching back and shielding his face with an arm, Flug almost fell over the table behind him as he tried to back away. “W-W-Wait, I didn’t  m-mean it like tha–!” He cut himself off with a fearful yelp as Black Hat yanked him forward by the neck of his shirt, his threatening form towering over the doctor.

“How did you mean it , then?” Black Hat snarled, voice dripping with a biting venom.

“Y-You’ve been acting like you think I have more worth now!” Flug squeaked, hiding his face behind his arms with eyes squeezed shut, a clear exasperation lingering among the fear in his words. “Like because I’m half monster, that changes things!”

Expecting to get pummeled in the next few seconds, it was to Flug’s great surprise that Black Hat let him go. Risking a timid peek at his boss, his jaw almost dropped. Why was he laughing all of a sudden?

“Of course it changes things!” Blackhat grinned, as though it were ridiculous for Flug to suggest otherwise. For some reason, that prickled at Flug’s nerves. “Now that I’ve seen what you are– ”

“What I am doesn’t change anything! I’m still the same Flug I’ve always been!” 

In a moment of surprise, Black Hat’s grin faltered. He’d never heard Flug take such a tone with him before, nor had he seen that particular look of frustration, dressed with hints of defiance, within Flug’s eyes.

“Have you been basing my value on species this whole time?” The scientist went on, irritation building, “What, I’m suddenly worth more to you just because I’m less human? Is that why you haven’t been kicking me around as much? Are you seriously that shallow?” With a scoff, Flug looked away, brows furrowed in anger. “If my being a human really disgusted you that much, I don’t get why you haven’t just replaced me with someone more your style.”

There was a tense moment of silence between them, although the tension was likely only on Flug’s side. Eventually, Black Hat spoke again.

“I believe that’s the first time you’ve dared to raise your voice at me, doctor.”

… Wait… 

Shit.

“I’m sorry…!” He squeaked in fear, cringing away from Black Hat in anticipation of being struck. Realization of how badly he screwed up hit him like a semi truck, and he scrambled over his words trying to do damage control in whatever way he could. “I-I don’t know w-what c-came over me! I-I’m v- very sorry, sir…!”

No violence came his way, however. Instead, Black Hat eyed him with what Flug could only describe as intrigue. His head tilted a smidge to the side, not unlike that of a curious animal. When he next spoke, it was with a kind of guileless tone completely foreign to Flug’s ears. “I have always valued you, Flug.” 

A disbelieving snort escaped Flug before he had the chance to stop it, slapping a hand over his mouth the second such a disrespectful noise had come out. How or why Black Hat hadn’t lashed out at him yet, Flug had no idea.

“You think I would have hired some annoying, sniveling little human if you weren’t of significant value to me? I know you’re smarter than that, doctor.” He drew closer, much to Flug’s discomfort. “In spite of what a pitiful sight you made, it was your intelligence that’d far made up for that. Your intelligence, your dedication, your perseverance, I have seen it all. From the day I met you, I knew your talents were exceptional.”

Baffled by such claims, Flug could do nothing more than stare in disbelief as his boss spoke.

“You impressed me that day, Dr. Flug. I can count on one hand the number of humans that’ve accomplished such a feat.” He went on, circling Flug to admire the work he had laid out on the table. “Humans are one of the most irritating and pathetic species I’ve ever come across in all my years. To have ended up relying on one for the sake of my business has been no less than a major frustration to me. Without you, who the hell do you think would be making all of our products?”

“I-I-” Flug started to speak, but was quickly silenced by the raise of Black Hat’s hand. Clearly, he had more to say.

“In a way, you’re not wrong. It does please me knowing that you’re not entirely human. You are something better. But, you’ve always been better than other humans in my eyes.” When he next turned to face Flug, it was with a narrow-eyed stare on his face. “So, don’t you dare suggest that I haven’t valued you until now. If that were true, I’d have left you dead in that alley all those years ago.”

At that moment, Flug had been rendered speechless. This was the first time Black Hat’s ever verbalized any sort of appreciation for Flug’s work, especially in such a direct manner. He almost couldn’t believe what he was hearing, tempted to reach out and poke the eldritch to make sure it was actually him and not some sort of caffeine hallucination.

Instead, he averted his eyes. As comforting as that was to hear, it didn’t change the main problem.

“You don’t treat your valuables very well, then.” Flug’s hesitant voice spoke up.

With a boisterous laugh, Blackhat twirled his cane idly. “So what? That’s of no consequence to me.”

“You seem to forget that I’m breakable, sir. It is a consequence if I decide to leave.” If he really is as valuable as Black Hat says... Looking away, he muttered under his breath, “It’s definitely something I’ve considered.”

That came as no surprise to Black Hat. He’s seen the collection of house and apartment ads the doctor’s compiled and occasionally glanced through when his boss’s temper was especially testy. But surely he’d never actually go through with leaving. Not after all the work he put in to get here. It would be absurd.

Not paying the comment much mind, Black Hat decided he was done with this conversation and headed for the door. “Get that ray done. We start filming in two hours.”

Such dismissive behavior was what Flug was used to letting roll off his back. But, this time, it felt like it didn’t matter at all compared to the other things his boss had said.

It was beyond reassuring to know that Black Hat found him important for what really mattered. There had been many a day where Flug had wondered if all of his efforts were actually counting for anything, in that regard.

Now, he won’t have to wonder. 

Something new to wonder about, however, was why this conversation had left him feeling so flustered …

Their uncharacteristically genuine conversation didn’t mean everything was sunshine and daisies, of course. After all, This is the house of evil. Can’t expect much else. What Flug was used to was being yelled at. Though there was one recent incident in particular that had been… strange.

As usual, Black Hat was eager to advertise anti-hero merchandise to their viewers. The demon rarely ever began recording early without first informing Flug, but today was, unfortunately, one of those days. He already had Cam-bot recording before Flug was even in the room. It’s not like he needed Flug there, anyways, so he just went ahead and started without him. The product seemed simple enough, some kind of fireball launcher of sorts.

Black Hat was well into the presentation by the time Flug had gotten there. The doctor had appeared somewhat rushed, and was carrying with him a toolbox.

His eyes widened with terror when he entered the room to see his boss already wielding the product.

“… and with just the click of a button, your local hero will be enveloped in a Hellish blaze!” Black Hat took aim at a target across the room.

“Sir, no!” Flug shouted, darting towards him, “There’s a chemical imbalance that still needs to be–!”

Too late.

There was a flash, then a blast of intense heat as the weapon backfired. Cam-bot went toppling over sideways, making a series of distressed beeping noises, and Black Hat let out a startled snarl as his arm was blown clean off. That wasn’t too much of a concern, however, as a stream of inky black energy quickly formed a new one.

He wheeled around, eyes blazing with rage as he faced the now-shivering Flug. “You IDIOT!!!” He roared, storming over to the scientist and roughly gripping his arm. “Is your job to have our products ready in time or IS IT NOT!?”

“I-I-I’m sorry….!” Flug yelped, cowering. “I-I thought I h-had more time…! I just needed to make one minor adjustmen–” He cut himself off with a pained outcry as Black Hat’s grip tightened, near threatening to break his arm.

“I don’t want to hear EXCUSES, YOU BLOODY– You…” Black Hat trailed off, a whisper of that recent conversation with the doctor echoing in his head.

You don’t treat your valuables very well.

You seem to forget that I’m breakable.

Staring over the terrified doctor now, the way he immediately expected the worst, something felt… off. Black Hat was the one that decided to start early and without Flug’s knowledge… but that still shouldn’t excuse not having it ready before the deadline, so–!

“Sir…?” Flug’s voice, tiny and horrified as it may have been, managed to shake Black Hat out of his thoughts. Fearful eyes gazed up at him with a hint of confusion on top of the pain. Very slowly, Black Hat loosened his grip, then let go altogether and took a step back.

Flug stepped back as well at the first chance he got, gripping his hurt arm close to himself. He gave a puzzled frown. “S-Sir…. are you…. alright….?”

… How could he be asking that? It seemed so… backwards.

… It doesn’t matter.

“Get this mess cleaned up…” Black Hat finally said, his voice unusually low, “… and fix that infernal Cam-bot…” 

Then, he was gone before Flug could even reply.

Watching the door close behind his boss, Flug winced as he rubbed his arm. Sighing, he picked up the dropped toolbox and turned to Cam-bot. “Let’s get you cleaned up, then…”

A flood of blood trickled down the now-lifeless body and onto the floor, Flug’s shaking arm wiping away what dribbled from his chin. With a chunk of neck completely missing from the corpse on the operation table in front of him, it was leaving quite the mess. The doctor tentatively reached up to pull his paper bag back down and cover his mouth, but Black Hat’s cane pulled his arm away before he could. Flug squirmed slightly beneath his boss’s touch as he lifted his chin , discomfort setting in him, but Black Hat paid that no mind.

A gloved thumb lightly grazing across the edge of Flug’s fangs, Black Hat’s expression was oddly monotone today. “… So, tell me.” He said suddenly. “If I’m so unbearable to live with, why do you stick around?”

“S-Sir….?” Flug responded, caught off guard by the question.

“You’re not being forced to stay here.” The eldritch went on. “You said yourself that you’ve considered leaving. Many other villains would be glad to take you. So why do you stay?”

Flug was quiet for a long moment, considering what he should say. Truly, there was only one right answer. “… B-Because the other villains aren’t you.”

At that, Black Hat paused, a twitch of surprise on his features for a second. Then, his eyes narrowed slightly. “Elaborate.”

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Flug started to fiddle with the sleeves of his labcoat. “W-W-Well, um… I-I mean, you’re… successful, c-confident, accomplished…” Oh gosh, why did he have to be listing off things he admires about his boss while they were in this position? Hardly any distance between them, and Black Hat leaned in closer with every word! Swallowing again, he tried not to get too flustered as he continued, “I-It’s just… well, you’re Black Hat. You’re one of a k-kind, the best there is. I don’t– I-I refuse to settle for less than the best.” Sheepishly, he looked to the ground, voice quieting. “You’re everything I’m not.”

Silent for quite some time, Black Hat found he was only able to give Flug a dumbfounded stare. The demon’s never had a tendency for modesty, for Flug to be so upfront about both his admirations and insecurities felt strange as can be. It was a combination that Flug likely never would’ve spoken aloud if left unprompted. Then, a smile began to form on Black Hat’s face. “Well, aren’t you the little ego-booster.” He purred, chuckling. “Although…” Stepping back and rubbing his chin in thought, Black Hat tilted his head and looked Flug up and down. “For one thing, if it’s something like confidence you’re wanting improvements on, you really shouldn’t spend your time hiding underneath that paper bag.”

Flinching back, Flug subconsciously ran his fingers across the edge of the bag. “N-N-No. I-I need it.”

“… Tsk. Fine, then. But still, I am curious…” Taking a step forward again, Black Hat brushed at the paper bag with his fingers. Flug jolted back before he could get a proper grip, almost tumbling over the body table in the process. Black Hat simply reached out with his cane, hooked it around Flug’s neck, and yanked him forward. With the other hand, he reached for the bag again.

“No!” In a panic, the trembling scientist grabbed his arm with both hands in an attempt to stop him, eyes squeezed shut.

Surprisingly, Black Hat did stop.

Flug hesitantly opened one eye to evaluate the situation. Black Hat was staring at where Flug had gripped him, same dumbfounded expression on his face as from the last time Flug touched him.

Slowly letting go, hoping that he wouldn’t try to remove the bag again, Flug frowned. “… U-Um… sir… I-If you don’t mind my asking…. W-Why is it you look so… bewildered … when I do that…?”

“Hmph,” Black Hat pulled his arm back after being let go, absentmindedly rubbing the spot he had been grabbed. He tried to cover up the bewilderment with a sly smile. “Maybe because the only time people ever dare to touch me is when we’re fighting or having sex. Why else?”

…. Flug chose to ignore that second part. His frown deepened, a touch of his own bewilderment setting in. “… So you’ve… never been, like… just… casually or platonically touched…?” 

Black Hat took a moment to think about it, looking off to the side. He couldn’t recall any instances of such a thing, aside from maybe shaking hands with clients, if that were to count? But those were more like business obligations rather than anything casual or platonic. “Hmm… No, never.” He eventually concluded. His eyes narrowed just slightly when they pulled back towards Flug. “Well, unless we count you.”

Normally Flug might’ve winced away in response to the slow return of hostility in Black Hat, but he was just… too flabbergasted. The concept of going through life without that ever happening seemed so farfetched for some reason, but he supposed if you’re a guy like Black Hat, maybe it’s plausible…..?

After a long moment’s thought, he hesitantly reached out a hand, pausing near Black Hat’s right shoulder as he examined his boss’s face for permission.

Black Hat’s eyes further narrowed with skepticism at the gesture, but he made no protest. So, Flug continued. His skeptical gaze followed Flug’s hand all the way until it had made contact with his shoulder.

It was strange, how all the malice slowly drained from his boss’s face upon contact. The look in his eyes was no longer one of hostility, but rather, curiosity. Perhaps a touch of confusion, but mostly a genuine sort of curiosity that was, in a way, almost innocent-looking. It was a rather strange expression on him, Flug finding himself unable to look away until Black Hat’s questioning pupils darted to Flug’s own face, wondering why he had gone so still.

Quickly averting his eyes, Flug went back to what he was doing. Very slowly, he ran his hand down the demon’s arm, as if he were simply smoothing out the fabric of his sleeve. Gentle, yet so impactful. If he wasn’t mistaken, he could’ve sworn he felt the slightest shiver from his boss as he had done so. Another sneaking glance to Black Hat’s face confirmed that he was just as confused as Flug was about the whole thing.

Slowly still, Flug raised his other hand to meet Black Hat’s chest, just letting it rest there for a while. Then, as if snapped out of a trance, Flug realized all at once how weird this must be getting and jolted backwards, the sudden movement even startling Black Hat a tiny bit. 

“I-I… um… s-sorry, sir…”  There Flug was, getting all flustered again. Why the hell did these strange interactions with his boss keep stirring up such confusing butterflies in the pit of his stomach?

Black Hat raised an eyebrow slightly, but other than that, his expression remained vaguely passive. He ran his own fingers along where Flug had touched him, quiet for some time. Then, his familiar smile crept back along his face as he looked back towards the doctor. “Seems only fair that I’d get to look beneath that bag of yours now, doesn’t it?”

Crap. Flug was hoping he’d forgotten about that. His gaze fell to the floor, accepting defeat with a very hesitant nod. “I-I-I s-sup-ppose so, s-sir…” He stammered, anxiety quickly on the rise.

A victorious purr rumbled in Black Hat’s throat, and he closed the space between himself and his scientist. Hands once again meeting the bottom of Flug’s paper bag, he took unusual care in how he lifted both the bag and goggles off of his face. As soon as those harsh white lights from the room’s fluorescent bulbs hit Flug’s eyes, a sharp yelp left his throat, and he threw his face in his hands to hide. 

“Seriously, Flug?” Black Hat deadpanned, unimpressed.

“I-I-I’m s-sorry. It’s t-too b-bright.” He stuttered, unable to stop trembling.

There was a moment of silence before Flug heard his boss’s voice again. “Open your eyes, doctor.”

Already feeling dizzy and anxious without the comfort of his bag, the thought of being made to endure such harsh lights on top of that was too overwhelming to handle. But the thought of angering Black Hat frightened him even more. So, he fought back every instinct that screamed at him to protect his eyes, stifled whatever stressful noises tried to escape him, and lowered his hands.

To Flug’s surprise, rather than the headache-inducing brightness he was expecting, he was greeted with a well-dimmed room, black smoke swirling above them to significantly dull the lights. No doubt compliments of Black Hat.

View of his scientist no longer obstructed, the wide-grinning demon took hold of Flug’s chin, lifting his head to get a better look. He could feel the halfling swallow nervously, but was too focused on taking in his appearance to notice or comment. Honestly, Flug looked like any normal human being if you looked past the eyes and teeth. 

But Black Hat didn’t. He was especially focused on those eyes, this being the first time he’s ever actually seen them goggle-free.

Flug’s eyes were without a doubt attention-grabbing. Where a human’s eyes would normally be white, Flug’s were an abyss of pitch-black, glowing white pupils being the only contrast to exist within. 

“Captivating…” Black Hat commented under his breath. While the comment was not specifically addressed for Flug, he certainly reacted to it, feeling an intense heat rise to his cheeks. His boss definitely took notice of that, smirk widening in response.

Embarrassed and feeling like he was going to pass out, Flug quickly grasped for his bag and pulled away from Black Hat, struggling to pull it over his head again through short and shaky breaths.

Evidently, having the bag and goggles was a comfort thing as well as an eye protection thing.

Satisfied, Black Hat gave a firm nod and turned for the door, smoke dissipating with a snap of his fingers. “Clean up your mess and get back to work.” He ordered as he left.

Flug had to take a moment to regain himself, doing everything he could to calm his nerves. With the combination of deep breaths and counting numbers in his head to refocus, the doctor slowly but surely found his composure again.

That was… quite the experience… Almost surreal ….

Placing a hand on the side of his head in confusion, Flug shook it off and went to take care of the body. The entire experience didn’t stop running through his head the whole while.

There were no words Flug had that could describe how their altered relationship had continued to shift and morph since then.

Flug first noticed it with the way Black Hat’s eyes studied him, bore through him right to the bone and stripped his soul bare. There lived no mordacity or annoyance behind his constant gazes, which was unnervingly strange in and of itself. Worse was that Flug couldn’t tell what Black Hat was looking at him with. Was it condescension? It didn’t feel like something that negative... Maybe… curiosity? Interest? But interest in what? No matter what explanation his mind tried to present, Flug knew there was something he had to be missing. Something he wasn’t seeing.

The mystery was only made harder to solve by the way Black Hat would touch him. In the past, the only form of physical contact they’d ever shared was aggressive in nature, as Black Hat had a nasty habit of manhandling anybody nearby in his moments of explosive rage. As such, it was hard not to flinch when the demon would put his hands on him. But, especially after that unusual encounter they’d had, his touches have become shockingly gentle. 

What were once brief pats on the back became lingering touches, claws tracing temperate lines along his meek frame, a hand resting on his shoulder just a bit too long… He’d also just stand far closer than usual whenever they were going over work projects together. Flug thought for a moment that perhaps all this time spent around Black Hat’s eldritch presence was finally driving him insane, but there was no way that he could be imagining these things. Out of all things for his mind to try and play tricks with, why something like this?

Furthermore, as someone who’s always enjoyed his alone time, Flug simply couldn’t wrap his head around why Black Hat kept joining him in the lab for the most benign of times. Even today, all he was doing was reading a newspaper with his morning acid, something he usually did in the comfort of his own office.

Occasional glances in his boss’s direction yielded the same results, those strange stares that made Flug feel so vulnerable being aimed back at him every now and then. He tried to focus on his work, to throw himself into his invention to distract from the outside world as usual, but his rattled nerves simply refused to let him do that today.

The next time he found his boss staring, Flug put down his tools, confronting the issue with a meek question.

“A-Are you ups-set with me?”

A glimmer of curiosity passed through Black Hat’s eyes. He put his newspaper down, that unnerving gaze completely honed in on his scientist. “What makes you think I’m upset with you?”

“W-Well, it’s… uh… I-I don’t kn-know, you’ve just b-been kind of…” Flinching slightly as Black Hat rose from his seat to approach him, Flug greatly struggled to finish that thought, looking all around the lab to avoid any sort of eye contact. “Y-y-you’ve b-been s-st- staring a l-lot lately, a-a-and, um–” He backed up as his boss got closer, just barely catching himself when he knocked into the table behind him, “A-and th-the t- touching … I-I just d-don’t u-und-derstand w-what–”

Flug’s stuttering was cut short when Black Hat took the side of his face into his hand, turning the scientist’s head to make their eyes meet.

“Tell me, doctor,” Black Hat purred, “Do I look upset to you?”

“N-n-no…?” Flug squeaked in response.

“There is your answer.” His head lolled to the side, studying Flug far too closely for comfort. His hand slinked down from Flug's face, the doctor withdrawing a sharp breath as deadly claws traced along his neck before finding its new resting place on his shoulder. “Does it bother you when I touch you?”

“W-Would it m-mat-tter if it d-did…?”

The way Black Hat narrowed his eyes at him, the hints of an annoyed frown starting to tug at his lips, quickly startled Flug into correcting his behavior. He straightened his back, answering the question directly this time. “N-no sir, it’s n-no bother.”

Just like that, Black Hat seemed to relax again. “Good.” He pulled his hand away, returning to the couch to pick up his newspaper. “You look like you’re having trouble focusing, so I suppose I’ll leave you to it for now.”

And, just like that, he was gone.

That… did not answer any of Flug’s questions.

Honestly, it was likely in Flug’s better judgment to stop questioning these changes in behavior to Black Hat’s face. Confusing as their new dynamic may have been, at least it was better than getting thrown around like a ragdoll on a near-daily basis. 

That wasn’t the way Black Hat saw it, however.

The way Black Hat saw it, all of this peculiar behavior had been a simple case of testing the waters. Unfortunately, his next move would be one Flug could’ve never prepared for.

Aaaand here’s where things get a little tumblr-unsafe, so to the AO3 void you go! (Please heed the warning tags over there)

[insertdisc5]

Devlog #10: Questions and Answers

Hello everyone! Welcome to this month’s devlog!

If you just stumbled upon this, I am Adrienne, also known as insertdisc5! I’m the developer, writer, artist, main programmer, etc of the game. The game being In Stars and Time, which is the next and final game in the START AGAIN series, following START AGAIN: a prologue (available here!).  You can find out more about In Stars and Time here!!! 

LET’S GET TO IT. This devlog is all about questions!!! So many questions!!! I’m gonna answer them all!!!

Happy 2023, everyone! It’s the year of In Stars and Time! In Stars and Time will release sometime this year on PC and Nintendo Switch! I hope you’re excited!!! In the meantime…

Nothing much to talk about this month! I am still fixing bugs, playtesters are still playing, etc. So… here’s another Q&A (Tumblr asks edition)! They're mostly characters/story based, because that's what Tumblr is all about. No spoilers though, I promise!!!

(PS: you can ask me questions whenever on tumblr btw teehee)

Anonymous asks: Hi!! Thank you for making such a wonderful game with lovely little characters!! I spin them in my head like microwaved macaroni. Can I ask what everyone's hobbies are? And their deepest fears? (If that's not too spoilery) Also have a good day!!

Siffrin likes to do wood carvings! Isabeau likes fashion, designing clothes, sewing them, that sort of thing. Bonnie likes to cook! Mirabelle and Odile both like to read- Mirabelle is a horror fan/YA type stuff, while Odile prefers non-fiction.

As for their fears, most of them are spoilery, but Odile is really afraid of heights.

Anonymous asks: I am DYING to know what that rope is on Mirabelle's outfit is, it's sometimes visible and sometimes not and I don't know what it's attached to?? I want to draw her but this rope!! Is getting me

It’s a rope that works as a belt! It goes around her waist, not her hips. It’s so her dress isn’t all flat and boring

Anonymous asks: oh DOES Sif like wearing slippers?? They seem like a slippers guy. Also what small things ticks the characters off?

YOU FELL INTO MY TRAP!!!!!!!!!!! Siffrin prefers socks. Mirabelle is the one who wears slippers.

Hm… I think saying those would be spoilers also, so I’ll just say that Odile hates when people keep secrets from her.

Anonymous asks: What is each party member's favourite season? While we're at it, what's their favourite kind of weather?

Hm… I think Siffrin is split between winter and summer (they have a good cloak that works for all kinds of weather!). Mirabelle’s and Odile’s are fall. Bonnie’s is summer (coastal kid!). Isabeau hears everyone say every season except spring and picks spring.

They all prefer sunny weather for different reasons. Siffrin because it’s easier to travel when it’s nice outside. Bonnie because they like the sun. Mirabelle because she likes to read outside under a tree, same with Odile. Isabeau because “being under the sun gives your skin a healthy glow!”

Anonymous asks: Questions! Do you have a rough estimate for how long the game will be? If this isn’t a spoiler, how did the gang all first meet? And if it is a spoiler then… what’s each of the gang’s favourite colour? 

I don't want to give any numbers just because playtimes will vary drastically depending on the way you play, but I can confirm ISAT is SIGNIFICANTLY longer than START AGAIN: a prologue!!!

For the gang meeting, first Mirabelle went traveling to try to save Vaugarde, then she met Isabeau in Jouvente, then they met Odile while traveling, then they met Siffrin, and then they met Bonnie. The nitty-gritty details aren’t really that important so I haven’t thought about it much. Most of the details on how they met will be found early in the game, so you won’t have to wait hours to know!

As for their favorite colors (Looks at the game. The game is in black and white) Think you’re funny, huh? HUH!?!???! NEXT QUESTION!!!!!

felikatze asks: how did siffrin obtain their fantabulous hat? and who is your favorite character to draw?

Siffrin was born with this cool hat. Popped right off with it on. And Siffrin is my favorite to draw, with Mirabelle a close second. Bonnie is my least favorite to draw within the gang but I still love them dearly. The King is my least favorite to draw period

inverts asks: why does siffrin wear gloves? what's loop's favourite food? what's the KING's favourite food? teehee

Bunch of reasons, but really the two main ones are 1. Looks cool and 2. Keeps them from biting their nails.

Thank you for the Loop question. No one asked about Loop!!! If Siffrin asked them their favorite food, Loop would say “bananas”. But is it true? Yes. But is it? Yes, for sure. But? Yes.

The King’s favorite food are uuuh (I go through my rolodex of foods) carambolas. Yeah

Anonymous asks: what are the gang's favorite hot cocoa toppings?

I don’t know enough about hot cocoa toppings to answer this, so have their favorite nonalcoholic drinks instead. Siffrin doesn’t think they have a favorite drink but really it’s sugarcane juice, Mirabelle’s is either tea or orange juice, Isabeau’s is probably milk or something, Odile’s is tea (but it’s gotta be expensive), Bonnie’s is pineapple juice.

Anonymous asks: whos the shortest (besides the kid) and tallest of them all?

Within the crew, Siffrin is the shortest (besides Bonnie), and Isabeau is the tallest! The real tallest is the King, of course.

Jovial-gender-jester asks: did the kid & their sister ever cook together?

Their sister taught them how to cook, so yes!

Anonymous asks: will we learn more about how Siffrin damaged one of their eyes? 

Yes :)

Anonymous asks: what’s your opinion on speedrunning isat/saap from a lore perspective? as in, what do you think goes through siffrin’s head when they decide to do it?

>:3c teehees evil-y (⬅has added an item and lore made specifically for speedrunners)

Anonymous asks: is the gang gonna be okay. are they gonna be happy

>:3c I teehee evil-y once more

Anonymous asks: Is there a map of the world? Where are things exactly (e.g. where is Ka Bue compared to Vaugarde (?) ?)

Have this map I drew early in development of the countries around Vaugarde. The story doesn’t really need me to know about The Whole Map so I didn’t think about it. I only figured out two neighboring countries’ names too so I could say other countries’ names for Worldbuilding Reasons (as in, to show Vaugarde is a country inside a world, and not just The Only Country In The World), but I do see Vaugarde as being surrounded with many other ones. Could’ve figured out more country names, but two is a good number. Ka Bue is on the other side of the world- Odile has been traveling for A While. For country sizes here, think European countries!

jovial-gender-jester asks: is it alright to ask how you came up with craftonomy? it was cool realizing it's different from craftology, and maybe has no bearing? the concept's fascinating!

Welcome to insertdisc5’s brainstorm theater

Hi I am insertdisc5 and I am making the prologue> ok i need a magic system for this world > fuck i can’t use basic fire water grass because one of my puzzles is all around finding a fire > ok well every magic system in rpg games is just rock paper scissors really > so… why not… just… rock paper scissors > ok but what kind of world comes up with that tho > so maybe it’s all around Creating Things… you can make all kinds of art with rock (sculpting) paper (art, writing) and scissors (uh… idk cutting things) and i kind of like the idea of magic being something similar to art, so let’s call it Craft > ok now i need to create events with every fucking thing i added to the maps, and also explain the world a bit more > the study of craft… craftonomy > hey you know how you have astronomy (studying space) and astrology (adding meanings to constellations, horoscope) so it’d be funny if it was the same, it would be a funny joke > craftonomy (studying craft) and craftology (“if you’re rock type you’re probably very strong but gullible hehe”) are born

Punkitt-is-here asks: How is RPGMaker treating you ⬅(best wishes)

Rpgmaker is my little cat that stays on my lap cutely and doesn’t even scratch me anymore. This is in big part thanks to my programmer who takes care of the really hard code for me teehee (THANK YOU ISABELLA!!!)

hummingcrows asks: How do you stay motivated!

I genuinely don’t have a helpful answer for this, I don’t find it hard to stay motivated to finish things in general… The few times I felt discouraged, I just either went “ok what’s like A Small Thing I can finish today, so this day isnt a total wash” even if it’s just doing one sprite, or “what’s one thing that would make me really happy to add” like a small scene or something, or just making the chairs’ backs rounder for Lore Reasons, and then I do it, and I am happy, and I am motivated

Anonymous asks: what was it like converting the character designs to game sprites? did they transfer easily or was it difficult?

Pretty easy! Outside of Siffrin (who already has a very simple design), I knew I would have to convert them into sprites, so I knew I couldn’t go too detailed with them. Even with their first concept art, I made sure to doodle them as sprites as well so I could make sure they would look distinct from one another!

(Very First Concept Art for everyone except Siffrin. Got their faces first try! (Except Bonnie))

Honestly the main problem was with their height… In the prologue, they all are very small, since I used a 48x48 size, and Siffrin has a MASSIVE hat that takes almost half his size, so all the other characters had to be drawn relative to Siffrin’s size, which meant I couldn’t add as many details as I wanted. I’m glad that for In Stars and Time I found a way to make the sprites taller (they’re 48x96 now, but I’m not using the full height), so now they are all cute and not squished.

(Some of the first sprites I did for the prologue. Look at how squished everyone looks!)

(Profile sprites for In Stars and Time)

roebeanstalk asks: Have you run into any mechanics you've been excited about, but have decided it's better to save them for a future project to keep this one going? Kind of a "kill your darlings" but for game mechanics?

I’m very happy to say that I’ve managed to add all the things I wanted to add to the game! It helped that there weren’t that many mechanics I wanted to add in the first place lol. I even had time to add one I scrapped early in development because it wasn’t that important! But it made me happy to add it so it’s in now!!!!

galaksyz asks: how many siffrins must be stacked on top of each other until they overtake the eiffel tower in height (ok i just wanted to give you the mental image of the Siffrin Pillar)

actual question: once the game is released, what part of fan reactions & creations would you look forward to most/what would you hope for most?

i think it would be awesome to see fan comics or animations, or OST remixes, or YT playthroughs, analysis/essay videos, maybe AUs... if you had to pick just one of those sorts of things, what would it be that you'd like the most?

212.9 Siffrins. Thank you for asking

And I genuinely love every single fan reaction/creation I've seen so far!!!! I have many folders filled with everyone's reactions/creations that I love to look at when I feel down :')

Fan comics definitely have a special spot for me in my heart tho... Those were always my favorite kind of fanarts to make, as a fanartist myself. The comics I’ve seen from the prologue already make me so so so happy!!!

And also, people just writing about the game… Like, just about things they like, things they’ve noticed, or theories they have, there’s also been a few and they just make me so happy. My brain goes on a loop of “yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah”. This is why I love the theories channel on the discord so much hehe, I tried really hard to add little breadcrumbs so it makes me happy when people pick up on it!!! And someone made a post that was just a list of everything they liked about the prologue and it made me so happy it felt like I was floating for a week hehe

pixxyofice asks: I am always curious about gamedev struggles. So... how hard is it to fix bugs for this game in particular? With the time looping I bet it would be hard to figure out maybe.

Uhhh and also what are each member's favorite colors?

Not that hard! I haven’t done a lot of Big Weird Code inside of rpgmaker, so any bugs are usually because I messed up a switch or variable, so it’s just a matter of figuring out the problem and changing one (1) thing. As for finding out there’s even a bug, that’s what QA and playtesting are for!

Bugs related to the time loop mechanic have (FOR NOW?!?) all been taken care of, so the bugs now are mostly related to choices, since some choices appear/disappear depending on where you are in the story. So sometimes I get a playtester like “hey Adrienne, i don't understand this choice i'm getting here”, and it’s because i messed up and it shouldn't be here yet. OOPS!

As for their favorite colors (I look again. The game is STILL in black and white. I try to run towards you but I'm held back) lemme at ‘em, LEMME AT ‘EM– (a few minutes pass, I calm down) Ok. What's the last question?

itr13 asks: what's everyone's favourite colors?

…..

Mirabelle’s would be a warm pink, Siffrin’s black, Odile’s dark green, Isabeau’s sunflower yellow, and Bonnie's black (but really, light blue). ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?!?!?

That’s all I have to say for today! Let me know if you have any questions, or if there’s any aspect of the game development struggle you’d like me to talk about! See you next time!!!

AND DON’T FORGET TO WISHLIST THE GAME ON STEAM ALSO IT REALLY HELPS BECAUSE STEAM’S ALGORITHM IS MORE LIKELY TO SHOW OFF GAMES WITH A HIGH AMOUNT OF WISHLISTS THAT’S THE REASON WHY GAME DEVS ALWAYS ASK TO WISHLIST!!! OKAY BYE!!!!

[sullys-nose-hair]

You were being naughty uwu 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️(jtk ofc)

Twirling and pulling my armpit hairs I was moaning in Jeff's ugky ass room while being on his stale bed sheets my CUTE GIRLY SWEET little voice just let out the CUTEST moans.

I srlsy am jus perfect

My 00000.1 cm legs trembled in the most CUTE and PERFECT way as u think I let out a little bit of piss from how good I was feeling playing wit my armpit hair.

Jeff didn't needa know I was being a naughty little kitten and playing with my sexy 10 ft long blonde armpit hair that had all the other boys in the mansion fall inlove w me

I'm jus so perfect

Suddenly the door slaed open in a sexy and dominate way as my Jeffy weffy boo stood on his thin legs that srlsy needed life support and it was a wonder on how he was still standing in them. His sexy black hair fell beneath his shoulders, the lice so easy to see crawling around in there just making me cream my cute Christmas themed outfit.

(this is ur cute Christmas themed outfit btw)

"Ma sexi bebeahha wha arae ya doin'" My Jeffy weffy poo boos sexy voice fileld my cute 1cm WHITE ears and I creamed in my BEAUTIFUL outfit again, my blue orbs not leaving Jeff's skinny form.

His lice made it's way into my vagina, twisting and turning as they ate a little bit of my CUTE AND TASTY flesh. Infesting in my vag as my toes curled, my 2 yard ling toenails digging into my flesh, cutting it up as my CUTE SEDY PERFECT BEAUTIFUL GURLY voice filled Jeffy weffys beetle infected room.

"ye tha rig ma creatures punisha my bebeha growl" Jeff's SEXU DOMINATE RASPY DEEP voice filled my ears that are WHITE as his little lice buddies followed his command and started literally eating my vag.

"j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-jeffy p-p-p-p-p-p-poo p-p-p-p-p-p-please h-h-h-have m-m-m-m-mercy o-o-o-o-o-o-on m-m-m-m-m-me" my GURLY CUTE BUEATIFYL ERTHESL voice squeaked out in between my CUTE moans as his SEXY DARK BLUE eyes filled with DOMANICE AND SEXILESS glazed down on my cute 00000000000.1 cm ft form. My 10 yard tites bouncing up and down as the lice started to spread onto my titties. My 100000 yard ass making me jit even touch his bed as it grew even more wit how excited I was and my CUTE AND SMALL waist making me have the PERFECT hourglass paired with my FLAT AND PERFECT stomach.

"bebeha growl ya needa paay fa ya bein nauoghty" his sexi and DOMANICE voice called out to me as his lice started to infest and nibble on my cute, thick yes SKINNY body.

I'm jus so perfect

My pookies wookies 🥺☝️ @backpackin @oreosplease @spooky-donut-ghost-house @urratfather01 @tomfuckery06

Getting a lil rusty istg🤧😔

[gagfadget]

People LOVE misinterpreting Black folk. I have a friend who's been the victim of a years long harassment campaign that has devolved into the craziest shit ever because she posted a take that was immediately misinterpreted by all the YT folk around her. Black trans woman btw, and the harassment campaign has got people convinced she's a TERF, lying about her age, secretly pretending to be trans, a kiwi farmer. Like you name it, they've said it about her. The most outlandish shit, all for being Black and daring to make a tweet. Like she literally got outed to her mother and doxxed over that stuff. The absolute abysmal treatment of Black folk on the internet is so depressing.

Oh my god I’m so sorry that happened to your friend! And yeah it is very easy for people to misrepresent what we’re saying for their own gain and clout so they can feel like they can get their chance to scold us.

For tvc fandom, I feel like a lot of them aren’t used to being in a fandom with a lot of black people in it and so they’re unfamiliar with the way black ppl in fandom approach texts. The black ppl in this fandom are very analytical and they love meta especially because we’re watching a show about racism and vampirism and how the two interact with each other. We are able to speak more on this and we are able to pull from our experience and pull from our history whenever we discuss this show and some of the white/nonblack book part of fandom do not get that some of the things they say are just flat out wrong or missing the point of what show Louis is trying to convey and the black fans have more of an understanding and more nuance with things that that book side may be confused about because this is our lived experience. They aren’t used to black people telling them to shut up when they say something racist and they’re view on what is racist is very skewed. They don’t see how saying things like “show Louis is inferior to book Louis” and then putting that in the tag for show fans to see is racist. They don’t get how annoying it is to go out into the world as a black person and then coming online only to see that. It’s frustrating and our frustration is always seen as an attack and never as an invitation to self reflect.

I’m tired so I may not be putting this in the best way but yeah 💀

[larz-barz]

Fanfic for fanfic'

You make a fanfic (any ship but maki and milo must be in the story)

Ill make a fanfic (maki and milo and Muichiro)

How does that sound?

(already working on it lol)

oooo ok! sounds fun!

——————————————————————————

Love potion (sort of happy ending)

——————————————————————————

Milo sat under a tree, crying.

She didn’t notice the demon king stalking her as his prey.

He injected a large dose of his blood into her, expecting it to kill her instantly.

However, what happened instead was more shocking.

Milo’s hair faded from black into a light purple, her left eye became magenta with a black sclera, and the kanji for upper moon 5 appeared in her eyes, on top of her white, heart shaped pupils.

——————————————————————————

The next day, Milo woke up that night being summoned to the infinity castle.

She hesitantly went through the portal only to be met by the other upper moons.

~after the meeting (it was just Muzan saying they have a new upper moon, upper moon 4 will be Maki now btw hehe)~

“So you’re a demon now too?” Maki asked Milo curiously and the neko demon nodded.

“Yeah.. me and Tanji got into a fight and I ran away. This is what I get for that I guess.” Milo explained, her voice held a mixture of various emotions.

Maki put a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “It’ll be ok Milo.” She attempted to comfort her and Milo smiled softly.

“Thank you Maki.” She thanked the fellow upper moon and noticed that the 2nd and 3rd moons had stuck around.

The 2 males were clearly arguing about something, well, Akaza was arguing. Douma was happily disagreeing with upper 3 just to annoy him.

“Well, bye Milo. Hopefully we’ll be seeing each other around.” She said with a smile and Milo nodded.

“Bye, see you later Maki.” She waved bye to the 4th upper moon as she walked off, being teleported out by Nakime.

The neko demon shyly approaches the 2nd and 3rd upper moons. She smiled softly before speaking. “H-hi… I’m sorry to bother the 2 of you but-“ She starts then gets cut off by Akaza, her ears then going flat.

“Welcome to the ranks, Milo san.” Upper 3 said then walked off.

“What a wonderful surprise Suzuki chan~!” He exclaimed, swaying slightly in his crisscrossed position on the cold, hard floor of the infinity castle.

She sat down in front of him and her cat ears stood upright once again, signaling she felt comfortable around the 2nd upper moon.

“I’ve only been a demon for a day and I’m already an upper moon. I think I became one upon creation honestly.. it’s pretty scary, y’know.?” She sighed when she said the last part and Douma gave a friendly smile.

“Don’t worry little lotus! We’ll take good care of you!” He exclaimed and the young demon smiled softly.

“I think I’ll like it here..” She mused, a smile on her face.

~the end~

A/n: I’m sorry this took so long! I’m gonna go start your sick maki request now!😭💕

i kinda wanna draw demon milo and douma with a bunch of lotuses ngl @thelordoflotuses

[penname-artist]

Dusty Crophopper - 2023 Refsheet

Been meaning to give him a touchup for a long time and FINALLY finished this (albeit kinda basic-styled) reference sheet of his main racer uniform. I also saved a "doll" of this to reuse consistently for even more outfit designs. I REALLY reallyreallyreally want to do a humanized version of his custom livery next.

But until then, here is his 2023 updated version!

Notes:

-in both casual and pilot versions, his jeans can vary in shade and may have stress marks or patches on them (because he works a lot and wears his jeans in very quickly). The difference in the two is just to show that variation.

-Replaced the two black lines on his jacket for the lightning bolts, FINALLY, and they interconnect around the underside of the hood to create the back portion of blue where the D7 is.

-JR symbol is left on his inside shirt and not the jacket; there's one on each sleeve and they were definitely just spray-painted onto a regular t-shirt of his (that shirt btw is a very very light grey, not a flat white)

-Freckles! While faint, he does have them not only on his cheeks but also his arms.

-his shoes probably aren't actually that bright, I just already merged the layers so I can't change it but they're probably muddy now so

[psystirene]

What RW scugs would taste like blended into a smoothie

Survivor: Vanilla Yogurt. Factory setting of a scug, factory setting of a smoothie (/milkshake at this point)

Monk: Coconut+Banana+Vanilla. Consider this, Vanilla is the flavor of their sibling (makes sense), they themselves are banana-coded, and the coconut is just in there for extra zest. Is it somewhat basic? Yes. Because Monk is somewhat basic. (By the way I know most smoothies involve Banana, but if I say Banana then it's specifically flavored as such)

Hunter: Lemon+Strawberry+Ginger. Hunter can't just taste normal- Honestly, realistically, it would be nasty- Because of the Rot, y'know. Anyways, bitter, a smidge spicy, but still red/pink with smoothie sweetness.

Nightcat: Sesame+Blueberries. Just about as black as a smoothie can get. Not very sweet; the taste overall just isn't all that intense. Most interesting feature is the texture. Alternatively, Oreo milkshake! But you know. That's licherally just a milkshake.

Gourmand: PB+Peach+Mango+Yogurt. The return of the yogurt flavor, not because of any relation, I just think Gourmand would be a thicker smoothie (/milkshake.. again). Creamy flavor yk. Same reason for the (smidge of) peanut butter... The fruit are both round and exude good vibes. I could also see Melon or Honeydew btw.

Rivulet: Battery Acid. Okay maybe he'd have blue raspberry flavor or something, but it would definitely be synthetic-feeling. Put some sour powder in there. Or some salt. Some energy drink in there. What the fuck is this drink???? Is it a milkshake??? a smoothie???? an affront to all that is holy??? FUCK IF I KNOW I don't make drinks

Spearmaster: Grape+Watermelon. A light and fresh drink... To perhaps be enjoyed with long biscuits, or perhaps some white chocolate sticks (whatever you call those). You can use it to drink your prescription medicine, just like Spearmaster after going to their therapist!

Artificer: Pomegranate+Blackberry+Cayenne Pepper. An honestly slighty fucked up smoothie with a deep red color. Doesn't go easy on the spice, more than you'd expect from just Cayenne, probably. The more it makes you feel like YOUR spit can turn a spear explosive, the better <3

Saint: Kale+Avocado+Banana. Yes this is a type of smoothie that exists... Kinda?? Anyways, it probably sorta tastes like grass, it's filling and could probably count as a dinner smoothie perhaps? It won't really keep you warm, it's a smoothie after all, but maybe you'll turn green afterwards

Enot: Mystery Sauce. It tastes different the longer it's in your mouth, and then the aftertaste is yet again something different. It kind of tastes like medicine, yet sweet, yet also flat sometimes. Thick smell and kinda looks oily <:(

Reblog if you want me to blend the iterators next /j More seriously idk what came over me so I may never do this again uhm. thumbs up

[thisworldisablackhole]

Top 25 Albums of 2023

These are not reviews, simply blurbs of my thoughts on each release. Some have more effort put into them than others. So without further ado...

25. Cursetheknife - There’s A Place I Can Rest

SOUNDS LIKE: HEAVY SOFT ALT ROCK FOR STARGAZING ENTHUSIASTS / LISTEN

Oklahoma rock group cursetheknife caught me by surprise with this release. This was one of those unplanned listens that I checked on a whim because I was intrigued by their 2000s emo "no spaces allowed" type band name paired with a black and white still life painting of an urn and some... cubes? I like it. This record is really great at being loud and quiet. Acoustic guitars and hushed, tired vocals are interrupted by a massive wall of crunchy guitars coloured by pretty harmonics and sustained tremolo bends. Reminds me of both the earth shattering gaze of Hum and the moody depressive folk of Pygmy Lush. A combo I never expected to hear but one that won me over without hesitation.

24. Militarie Gun - Life Under the Gun

SOUNDS LIKE: MELODIC POST-HARDCORE FOR GROOVERS / LISTEN

I wasn't a huge fan of the mix on Militarie Gun's earlier EP's. I liked what they were trying to do musically, but it sounded dry and flat, and vocalist Ian Shelton's strained pleas for love hardly changed their inflection enough to keep me waiting on stand by. My first impressions of this band were completely turned on their head and booted into outer space when I saw them live. Everything made sense. The mix from stage was loud and dynamic, with just enough room verb to slick up their sound. The songs were tight, catchy, and had enough punch to shake you to your core. Their performance that night left me awed, and I’m happy to say that version of the band I saw on the big stage is much better portrayed on this LP. What we get is 12 songs of 90s influenced, groove laden post hardcore that would make any fan of Fugazi, Lungfish or Self Defence Family happy.

23. PinkPantheress - Heaven Knows

SOUNDS LIKE: DRUM & BASS WITH SOUR KEY POP HOOKS / LISTEN

Where are you feat. WILLOW was the first song to draw me into the downtempo bubble gum world of PinkPantheress. Downtempo and bubble gum might sound like distant, thrice removed descriptions, but melancholic piano leads, ambient backing vocals and breakbeat drum samples are combined with PinkPantheress’ signature high pitched, sweet vocal delivery and highschool journal-esque lyrics in a way that hasn’t been done before. Things are generally more upbeat on this album, and it’s good that way. I actually think her style works better when the energy is high and the drums are quick. This album is almost flawless with the exception songs like Bury me, Internet baby and Feelings where the bass lines slow down into a warp, the drums become more sparse, and the lyrics become more repetitive. It’s these moments where the energy and charm are lacking and the result is just meh. Trim the fat, take out a few of these songs, and the album would be a 5/5.

22. Year of the Knife - No Love Lost

SOUNDS LIKE: HEAVY HARDCORE WITH LONG HAIR SENSIBILITIES / LISTEN

Woof, not only does this band have the grit and claws to survive and face real life tragedy, but their tough as nails resolve as individuals is fully apparent through the music they create as well. This album is punishing, frantically violent, but measured and controlled. This band absolutely smokes through powerviolence blast beats and nasty death metal riffage with a cool head, creating a record that teeters on the edge of deathcore at times without ever giving in to the cornball theatrics (which I love btw).

21. END - The Sin of Human Frailty

SOUNDS LIKE: CHAOS, PANIC, CAUSTIC BURNS, METALCORE / LISTEN

Face melting, pummeling madness, blah blah name your adjective, this band has it. Dissonant and chaotic metalcore that will make you feel like you’re being buried alive - face down in the dirt fighting for your life. The production on this thing is DENSE and begs to be played loudly. The layers of noise are packed together in a tight weave that really adds to the oppressive, suffocating nature of their music. Yet it all begins to break apart and show it’s intricate colours the more volume you pump into the speakers. If you’re not a fan by the time Hollow Urn hits you with that cinematic, theatre rumbling bass drop that sounds like a war horn from hell, then I don’t know what to tell you.

20. Panopticon - The Rime of Memory

SOUNDS LIKE: UR LAST MOMENTS BEFORE YOU DIE IN THE WOODS ALONE LOL, ATMOSPHERIC BLACK METAL / LISTEN

This is it, this is gonna be the album that finally reignites my love for black metal. Beautiful, atmospheric, sad. The opening two tracks are full of gothic folk passages packed with orchestral strings, acoustic guitars and even a softly blown flute. By the time the blasting drums, guitars and tortured howls kick in 8 minutes into Winter’s Ghost, it feels like you just got snapped thru a speed run flash back of someone’s personal grief simulation. Your heart will sink through the fucking floor, but from that pain will rise immense beauty and the courage to trudge thru the brutal, frozen wasteland soundscapes of The Rime of Memory.

19. Silent Planet - SUPERBLOOM

SOUNDS LIKE: THE SOFTWARE CHIP IN YOUR BRAIN IS MALFUNCTIONING, METALCORE / LISTEN

I’ve been watching Silent Planet from the sidelines for a couple years now, first being introduced to them through their 2021 effort Iridescent, and then dabbling in some of their older catalog which oddly made me think of an alternate timeline where La Dispute was a metalcore band. I wasn’t a huge fan of hearing melodramatic slam poetry before my breakdowns, but they had a knack for songwriting which made them hard to discredit. Their earlier work just seemed like something I would have had to be there for on release to fully appreciate. Now was my chance. When singles started dropping for SUPERBLOOM, I was excited to finally be on board the hype train for one of their records. This record ended up showcasing a heavier, more modern and electronic influenced side of the band than we’ve seen before. Anecdotally, when this was released I was in the midst of a Cyberpunk 2077 playthrough, and found it to be a very fitting soundtrack to the game. Colourful and archaic. There are a lot of fun and creative ideas on this LP, some of which aren’t given ample room to breathe, but are nonetheless present. I found some of the tracks a little unmemorable at first but it honestly sounds better the more time I give it between listens. Only time will tell how it continues to age.

18. Polaris - Fatalism

SOUNDS LIKE: THE BOUNCY CASTLE AT UR PARTY IS DEFLATING, METALCORE / LISTEN

Polaris are good at what they do. Maybe too good. They are at the pinnacle of modern progressive metalcore alongside bands like Erra and Northlane, but whereas Erra excels in technical proficiency, and Northlane excels in synth pop metal integration, Polaris just brings down the emotional hammer. This band excels in the art of mixing heavy progressive riffs with soaring, passionate, radio ready choruses that just tug at your heart strings. I think Fatalism is overall heavier than their 2020 album The Death of Me, but they have doubled down on all the parts of their formula which make their songwriting so effective at simultaneously jerking tears and making your fists swing in a rage.

17. Night Verses - Every Sound Has A Color in the Valley of Night…

SOUNDS LIKE: SWIRLING, INTOXICATING INSTRUMENTAL PROG METAL / LISTEN

I was pretty adamantly opposed to instrumental music outside of electronic and ambient for a long time until I recently started reading books again. I wanted to see if I could get two birds stoned at once and listen to some tunes that I would usually avoid while I absorb words. I ended up enjoying this release so much that I started listening to it even when I wasn't reading books, but it does make every page you read play out like an intense action scene, so I'm inclined to continue listening in that fashion. Night Verses are an instrumental metal band, but don't go into this expecting full gas technical wankery. Night Verses are pro's at utilizing restraint and softer textures to weave a narrative with their instruments. Never have I encountered a band so skilled at telling a story without words.

16. Termina - Soul Elegy

SOUNDS LIKE: EMO ROBOTS FROM NEPTUNE DISCOVER TECHY DEATHCORE / LISTEN

I was first introduced to this outfit through their single Parasocial and was immediately sold. Sharp, twisting angular guitar leads over over deathcore inspired instruments and vocals. At one point the instruments drop out into an evil bass heavy hip hop beat with pitch shifted demon vocals before launching straight back into full auditory assault. It was just straight up one of the coolest switch ups I've heard in a metal song before and I was really hyped to hear what else they had in store. Ultimately I didn't enjoy the other singles on first listen as much as Parasocial, but the rest of the album really delivered upon release. There are points during this record where I feel like it was written by an AI; algorithmically engineered to release the right amounts of dopamine in my brain at specific intervals to keep me engaged. I don't mean that as an insult, as the result is a highly addicting LP that hits all the hallmarks of modern metal while still feeling innovative and fun.

15. Dying Wish - Symptoms of Survival

SOUNDS LIKE: THAT SHIT UR 40 YEAR OLD METALHEAD HOMIE PUTS ON THE AUX, TURN OF THE CENTURY MELODIC METALCORE / LISTEN

I was exposed to this band when they were on tour with Counterparts. The bill that night was supposed to be Counterparts, Dying Wish, Foreign Hands and SeeYouSpaceCowboy, but unfortunately Foreign Hands had their vehicle broken into in Washington and couldn't cross the border. I was still treated to a ménage à trois of metalcore excellence that night, but was especially blown away by Dying Wish as they were the only band on the bill I wasn't familiar with. My expectations were low and they spin kicked me in the teeth with their oldschool melodeath inspired riffs. From that moment on I was eagerly awaiting this album. The singles they drip fed us showed a marked improvement in their songwriting and especially in Emma's performance as a vocalist. The full album proved to be a worthy contender, bringing back a solid nostalgic sound to an arena packed to the brim of tiresome modernity. I still can't get the sound of those crash laden breakdowns out of my head.

14. fromjoy - fromjoy

SOUNDS LIKE: CHAOTIC GRINDIN MATHCORE MADE BY DEPRESSED ZOOMERS WHO PROBS GREW UP ON 4CHAN / LISTEN

This is a very recent addition to this list, but one that has swiftly earned it's place. There have been plenty of bands this year that have done this kind of chaotic, math influenced metalcore, but none that have blended the sound with electronic breakbeats and haunting choruses the same way fromjoy has. I can get kind of tired of albums that are just 100% speed and brutality front to back, but fromjoy have injected enough elements of other genres here to offer moments of respite from their brain melting, hellish soundscapes. Songs like of the shapes of hearts and humans, or the saxophone vaporwave of Helios, are much like a bench atop a canyon vista. A moment to regroup and recover before you continue pushing that boulder up hill.

13. Invent Animate - Heavener

SOUNDS LIKE: U JUST PISSED OFF SOME ANGELS BRUH, METALCORE / LISTEN

Invent Animate are a progressive, atmospheric metalcore band. Sounds pretty fuckin cool to me, but I have a strange relationship with this album. It's an album that I've always liked, but have really struggled to connect with on an individual track basis. It took months of casual listening before I could really differentiate one track from another. It all sort of blurred together, which is on one hand a testament to the atmosphere they have created with this record, but on the other hand it created a challenge to find specific moments to draw me back in. Despite that I still really enjoyed the general sound of what I was hearing; heavy polyrhythmic riffs backed by icy reverberated synthesizers which melted into breakdown ASMR in my headphones. It wasn't really a hard decision to continue giving it a chance to grow on me, and I'm glad I did.

12. TesseracT - War of Being

SOUNDS LIKE: IF DREAM THEATER WAS GOOD LOL, PROGRESSIVE METAL / LISTEN

I was a huge fan of TesseracT's album One back in the early 2010's. I decided to revisit that album earlier this year just out of curiosity to see if I would still enjoy that kind of music, and I was pleased to find that the album still sounded just as good to my 28 year old brain as it did to my 16 year old brain. It's always a nice feeling to realize that your younger self didn't have terrible taste in music. During this time of re-listening to One I had no idea that they were on the verge of releasing a new album. When the single War of Being dropped in July I was absolutely floored to find out that not only did their old material still hold up, but their newest material was absolutely on par with it. The groove, the heaviness, the atmosphere, Daniel Tompkins sultry sweet vocals and crushing screams. It was clear to me that TesseracT hadn't missed a single step in their newest endeavor. It was a full package that made the 16 year old in me gleam from ear to ear.

11. Mental Cruelty - Zwielicht

SOUNDS LIKE: LEGOLAS FUCKED UP AND TOSSED GIMLI STRAIGHT INTO THE ORCS, SYMPHONIC DEATHCORE / LISTEN

I didn't even really know what deathcore was until I saw Lorna Shore's Pain Remains plastered all over the front page of sputnikmusic and the users top albums of 2022 lists. I decided to give it a try out of morbid curiosity and discovered that I actually really loved the combination of heavy as fuck instrumentation, twisted pig squeal vocals and symphonic, fantasy soundtrack-esque passages. It was like nothing I had ever heard before and I loved the total absurdity of it. Discovering Mental Cruelty just cemented my newfound love for this genre. Zwielicht is epic, grandoise, brutal, disgusting and beautiful all at the same time. The symphonic breakdown on Pest makes me feel like I'm listening to a metal record while witnessing firsthand the battle of Helm's Deep in Peter Jackson's adaptation of Tolkein's The Two Towers. Dark and dramatic, this album perfectly conjoins my love for both extreme metal and fantasy.

10. The Republic of Wolves - Why Would Anyone Want To Live This Long?

SOUNDS LIKE: YOU JUST GAVE THE INDIE KID A NOOGIE, LOUD ALT ROCK / LISTEN

The Republic of Wolves completely blindsided us with a surprise EP in December, just two weeks before Christmas. I had listened to this band very briefly back in 2011 when they released The Cartographer, but it wouldn't be until discovering Shrine a couple years ago that I really fell head over heels for them. Their moody, dim lit and introspective brand of post hardcore tinged indie rock felt like it was tailor made for my tastes. To put it simply, this new EP is fantastic, but it comes with a caveat; the mix. It is raw and unpolished. Maybe a little thin and tinny sounding when compared to Shrine. This release is kind of like a haphazard demo tape thrown together just to remind the world that they still have the chops, and boy do they ever. Hidden below the rough edges of this recording is some of their most adventurous and rewarding song writing. Beautiful moments reveal themselves like treasure chests on the high seas, and the closer you get the more they glisten.

9. Koyo - Would You Miss It?

SOUNDS LIKE: I DONT HAVE ANYTHING FUNNY FOR THIS ONE, SAD POP PUNK IS ALREADY A JOKE / LISTEN

Pop punk! A genre that I always thought was kinda corny and lame until I started listening to The Story So Far and realized that it can actually be incredibly potent, emotionally charged and energetic form of catharsis. Koyo really fit the bill when I was searching for more bands that would satisfy my TSSF cravings. Although I'm not a huge fan of "gruff bearded IPA guy" vocals in punk music, Koyo's songs were so catchy and impactful that even the singer eventually won me over, and this record found itself in constant rotation.

8. Maruja - Knocknarea

SOUNDS LIKE: HARDCORE KIDS STARTED LISTENING TO JAZZ AND NICK CAVE, POST PUNK / LISTEN

My friend randomly sent me a song from this, saying that it auto played for him on spotify and he thought I would like it. I was enthralled by it immediately and it ended up being the best thing he has ever recommended to me. I am a huuge sucker for saxophone and firmly stand behind the opinion that horns can improve almost any genre of music, especially when that genre is moody post punk blasting straight out of the smoky stairwell exit of an underground english club. Maruja's use of the saxophone is much more than just a garnish though, it is woven into the structure of each song the same way a guitar would be. When paired with the anguished croons of vocalist Harry Wilkinson, the result is an atmosphere almost oppressive with it's heavy yet deeply moving temperament. This will undoubtedly be a band to pay close close attention to in the coming years.

7. Johnny Booth - Moments Elsewhere

SOUNDS LIKE: BOTCH TAPE IS IN THE STEREO AND UR BRAKES JUST STOPPED WORKING, METALCORE / LISTEN

I had never heard of this band before this album dropped, and I only checked it out because their name sounded weird as hell to me. I thought we left name-names like Billy Talent in the dust years ago. What I wasn't prepared for was the scourge of angry-fun math infused metalcore behind it's surreal cover art. One thing that made this album stand out to me was the pure variety of sounds and influences available. Everything from Botch worship, dreamy alt rock reminiscent of the softer cuts on Loathe's 2020 mammoth ILIIAITE, and Blood Brothers inspired "four on the floor" dance punk. This album portrays itself like a psych-ward colouring book, and the result is an album that never feels boring or out of touch.

6. Spiritbox - The Fear of Fear

SOUNDS LIKE: NEW AGE, EASY LISTENING, ALTERNATIVE METALCORE / LISTEN

Spiritbox have been a controversial band in the metal community, mainly criticized for their streamlined, "sterile" (not my words) take on pop infused metalcore. I for one love the fact that they are creating heavy music that is still accessible, smooth, and packs enough heart to caress the unwrinkled surface of my brain. This EP is extremely succinct, all killer no filler, and just a really great example of all the strong suits this band has to offer. Songs like Cellar Door and Angel Eyes are just heavy and intense, purely utilizing harsh vocals to convey the feeling of anxiety that comes with grappling your sense of self. Nothing has resonated with me this year more than Courtney screaming "I can't live in this world while I breathe in another one" right before the heaviest fucking breakdown. Too Close / Too Late, The Void, and Ultraviolet are all shimmering and beautiful alt-metal tracks with no harsh vocals present at all. Jaded sits firmly in between, open arms firmly grasping from all corners of Spiritbox's repertoire to create a perfect balance of screaming, frost bitten metallic riffs and a chorus so catchy it could rival some of the biggest pop R&B artists on the radio today.

5. Nothing,nowhere. - Void Eternal

SOUNDS LIKE: THE PICTURES IN YOUR HIGHSCHOOL LOCKER, NU METAL, METALCORE / LISTEN

Given the fact that this album features Pete Wentz, Shane Told, Buddy Nielsen, Underoath vocalists Spencer and Aaron, as well as some more contemporary artists such as Will Ramos, Connie Sgarbossa and Olli Appleyard, it confuses me to see how little it is talked about. I don't know if this album completely flew under the radar of post hardcore and metalcore fans, or if it was just written off as over produced studio nostalgia bait. Naysayers be damned as there are some seriously catchy, well written songs here. Even when the album ventures into Linkin Park nu-metal rap territory, Joe Mulherin is just such a talented vocalist and song writer that he always brings the songs back to earth with a bangin chorus or death defying breakdown.

4. Wednesday - Rat Saw God

SOUNDS LIKE: IF MBV WAS A COUNTRY BAND, TWANGY ALT ROCK / LISTEN

Kind of the oddball addition to this list, but god damn I love this album so much. Even though I come off as a metalcore fan first, a lot of my favourite artists are actually 90s indie rock bands of the slacker variety, and adjacent americana influenced singer songwriters. Wedneday checks all the boxes that I love about 90s alternative music. Rough around the edges but infectious with it's melody. Reminiscent of both the untuned honesty of David Berman and the super charged, off kilter charm of Swirlies.

3. Hail The Sun - Divine Inner Tension

SOUNDS LIKE: AN EDGIER, COOLER MARS VOLTA, PROGRESSIVE POST-HARDCORE / LISTEN

This was my most anticipated album of the year, and one that I made the unfortunate mistake of burning myself the fuck out on it's singles. I listened to Maladapted, Under the Floor, Chunker, and Mind Reader so many times in a row that when the full album was released, it just sounded WEIRD to me. Obviously I didn't let that get in the way of my enjoyment, but my brain had been wired to expect certain songs to be preceded by and followed by certain songs. Ya know what I mean. It threw me through a loop and it took a long time for the other songs to really click into place. Divine Inner Tension is one of Hail the Sun's strongest and most fun albums to date. These tracks are smart and witty, dazzling with it's technicality and playfulness. Math rock guitar harmonies, funky bass lines and spastic drum fills phase in and out of battle stances before breaking free into powerful choruses and descending back down their stairwell of madness. Vocalist Donovan Melero can be a bit of an acquired taste, but fans of The Mars Volta will feel right at home listening to the dramatic flair in the ceiling shattering range of his voice. Despite the fact that he can sometimes hold me back from recommending this band to people in my inner circle, I couldn't imagine a more perfect vocalist for the band. He knows how to command a room, and sometimes (if you close your eyes) the instruments feel like an extension of his voice, spreading from his open mouth like tendrils to do his bidding. Admittedly I still feel a stronger emotional connection to New Age Filth and Wake, but this band doesn't miss and I'm sure my emotional attachment to Divine Inner Tension will grow the more it marinates and the singles that I burnt myself on begin to simmer down into a stew on low boil.

2. Aviations - Luminara

SOUNDS LIKE: BEING EMBRACED BY THE SWEET WARMTH OF THE COSMOS, PROGRESSIVE ROCK, METAL / LISTEN

Beautiful melodies, progressive signatures, intricate harmonies, bright pianos and sweet, soaring vocals. This album engulfed me in it's gorgeous fiery glow and there was no looking back. Despite technically being a metal band, pure heaviness is merely a fork in the road on Aviations journey, a stormy mountain passage per se. In fact, I think one of the most impressive aspects of this band is their ability to utilize downtuned guitars and hard hitting polyrhythms in the softest way possible. Screams are sprinkled here and there on different tracks for emotional emphasis, but fourth track Legend is the only song on the album where the band goes all in on the heavy. They offer us a brief, deafening glimpse into their realm of madness before switching gears with La Jolla back into a band that sounds suspiciously like a modern church worship group, almost as if Legend was just an accidental slip of the mask that you were definitely not supposed to see. Watch your back. It doesn't matter which mask this band wears though, as everything they do is just beautiful and unique in it's ability to sound like a sunrise in motion. Adam Benjamin's vocals are just icing on top of an already sickingly sweet cake. His ability to dance between delicate falsetto and smooth, passionate wails makes me believe he has cherry blossoms and bleeding hearts in place of vocal chords. Luminara is a testament to what can be achieved when six technically proficient musicians come together with a central vision to create a a metal album that moves mountains with it's tenderness. The artistically explorative and emotionally impactful music they have laid down here make it an easy pick for second place.

1. Currents - The Death We Seek

SOUNDS LIKE: JUMPING IN THE BATH WITH A TOASTER OVEN, STICKING A FORK IN AN OUTLET, METALCORE / LISTEN

See below or click here for my full thoughts on the undisputed AOTY of 2023.

[bluedraggy]

Danonymous' Ink-Eyes - redux

Still lingering around Tumbr - and sometimes I have something I can actually post without the Tumblr-gods striking me down with great fury and vengeance. Latest coloring of another Danonymous Ink-Eyes. Here not just her eyes are giving off evil red evilness too.

Real reason I wanted to post this is I did the shading in a radically different way than I usually do. Is it better? Worse? Shrug. It's different. That's all I can say for sure. You "real" artists already know this method I'm sure, but I've not really used it before.

So I started with Danonymous' original of course. (he actually had it as black lines on a dark grey background - but judicious use of Photoshop's Exposure adjustments fixed that right up!)

Next, standard flat-colors (I just copied from my original Danonymous Ink-eyes that I still have the .psd file for) Also ignore the mask color towards the bottom. I screwed up but it looked good so I ended up keeping the screwup.

Now here's where things start to deviate from my normal method. At this point I copied this flat-color layer, shifted all the colors towards blue and darkened them. As the color-gurus say, shadows tend more towards blue, so I just moved everything towards blue.

Now, it wasn't originally that radical. I mean, that's practically an almost-black on black lines. Originally it was just a LITTLE bit darker and bluer than the first flat-colors layer. But as I continued working on it, when I came up with the background it kept looking better DARKER, so I ended up much darker for this second layer than originally planned. So what's the deal with these two layers?

Layer mask.

I've long been aware of layer masks. I just haven't USED them much. But now I understand better why they are the preferred method. So this is the layer mask attached to the darker, "shadow" layer. And that layer is over the top of the normal flat layer. This is NOT the "shadow" layer - it's the layer mask FOR the "shadow" layer. Why is that important?

Well, if you just made a flat, normal grey layer and stuck it over the top of the flat layer, you COULD just erase parts of the flat grey layer with a soft eraser and then naturally see the flat colors underneath. It would effectively do the same thing. BUT... what if you later wanted to put back some of what you'd removed? (important when doing those little muscle areas btw!). You can't just "paint" it back in if it's actually colored. Well, you might be able to, but it would be a huge headache.

Instead, a Layer Mask let's you vary the transparency of the top "shadow" layer so you can let part of the underlaying layer show through - but it's non-destructive to the "shadow" and underlaying layer. You can "play" with the transparency. Anything you color black in the Layer Mask will be 100% transparent showing the underlying layer. Anything you color white will be completely opaque, showing none of the underlaying layer. And grey, of course... let's some through.

The important point though is you haven't touched either color layers! You just changed the transparency of the top layer. You can put it back (color the layer mask black). Or make it a little more/less transparent (color darker or lighter grey in the layer mask).

It's not a magic bullet, but I understand now why it's useful. Because of the non-destructiveness to the top and bottom layers! And that's cool!

That's most of all I wanted to say here. But I might as well show the rest of the progress. With flat color layer under the "shadow" layer and the layer-mask on the "shadow" layer applied, I get this:

Not sure I'll keep using this method, but it does work well and I bet most all pro artists use it basically like this.

So I decided I'd do another moonlit Ink-Eyes with dark background...

The rest was pretty standard stuff really. "Shine" layers set to Color Dodge for shiny butt, shiny hair, shiny spear handle etc. A highlight layer over everything for that eye dot (I find color dodge shine layer doesn't work well for highly saturated colors so I literally paint over them directly.) The red was an Outer Glow on the flat color layer, but then I separated the Outer Glow into a Rasterized layer of it's own and then applied Motion Blur over it. Gave a pretty cool effect. A %30 transparent layer for reflections (on spear handle reflecting her legs, on bikini top giving some reflections too, though primary purpose there is just to not let her boob-edge get lost in the dark background.)

So I still am learning new methods. Why did it take me years to "discover" layer masks? Frankly because I didn't need them. But I do like how this came out so I might use them more than "painting" shadows in.