#forgive me father for know not what I say

[r3starttt]

GOOD LUCK, BABE!

cw: tlou universe. Comphet Abby, slightly suggestive. Angst. Sad ending!!!

an: not proud!! forgive me if this sucks, I just needed to write this

Approximately three hours passed by since she left that good night kiss on the man sleeping next to her. Abby had been tossing around in bed endlessly, first being unable to sleep and then fighting with herself to stay asleep, trying to find calm and comfort within the torture her mind was going through. The endless corridor, the blood on the wall, her hands desperately gripping the dead body, her dad’s empty body. It had been a while since she’s got that nightmare, but so far, she had learned to manage it. Maybe because you weren’t there.

She jolted awake, her heart racing and her breaths coming in shallow gasps. It was in that moment of vulnerability that the floodgates of her suppressed emotions burst open. In fact, there had been plenty reasons for her emotions to burst. You being the main reason.

Settling herself in bed, trying to catch her breath as her elbows rested on the mattress, holding her whole weight. Her gaze shifted next to her, the man sleeping on her side still unaware of the situation. unusual considering he’d wake her up most times. At least he cared about her, it was real love coming from his side.

She had gotten used to this in a desperate attempt to find an explanation for everything. Forcing herself into believing it was her father the reason behind it all. Yet, despide the effort, she found herself haunted by memories that refused to leave her mind and heart alone at any time.

But oh she’s stubborn, so, for years she made it work. Abby had spent so long trying to fit into the mold her own mind had built for her, trying to convince herself she was fine, she had been burying her feelings, making anybody else responsible for them, anyone but herself.

Her fingers ran over the man’s hand, resting over her lap. Gently, she tossed it away, placing it over his own body.

The cold air hit her body once she moved the blanket down her knees, standing up. her arms moved as a reflex, hugging her own body. She needed the comfort.

With slow steps she got out the bed, then out of the room, her heart kept beating in such way it had became unbearable. All because of you.

Because she had gotten over the idea of her dad being ripped from her, she knew she wasn’t guilty, she had no control over it, there was nothing she could’ve done to prevent it or make it hurt less. But you, she could’ve done something for you, she had, indeed control about the whole situation and she could’ve done so much to prevent it, but she didn’t.

And not only was she the reason of it all but she could never apologize. And the last memory she had about you was painful, because of how she made you feel, because of what she said and what she did to you, because of what you replied to her. Because you were right, and she was not. And that broke her soul.

You knew her so well you knew how she’d end. With a man she doesn’t love, regretting everything she had ever done and feeling alone even when she’s not. Because that’s her. And you made sure to let her know that the last time you two ever spoke.

And so far, she was able to keep the memory blurry and locked somewhere in her. Until tonight.

You felt so warm, embracing her empty body, telling her everything would be just fine, saying sorry repeatedly for her lost. Maybe it broke her that it wasn’t just a nightmare, but a memory.

Because Owen didn’t even bother to ask her if she was right when he first saw her after her father’s dead. Not because he didn’t care but because he had no clue of what had happened. But you? you where there, you saw it too and never left her side after that, not until she pushed you away.

You met her when fireflies were still a thing, and never left her side since the moment you crossed paths. You swore you were soulmates, and she never said otherwise. She never did, not even now.

You were her childhood best friend, and she was yours, and god you two made sure everyone knew.

Her friends were your friends, her family was your family, you shared everything, knew everything about the other. And even after years both can agree there could never be a replacement for that, maybe because you met being so young but, the bond between both is a once in a lifetime kind.

After her dad died you were all left for her, well, the closest to family she had, she was never alone. And that was the problem, she had everything and everyone a human could wish for in such times like those, but it wasn’t enough for her.

It wasn’t enough because her mind always messed things for her, because her dad and what had happened to him kept making harm, not only in her but in others.

She got blinded by the pain on her heart, and even like that you never left her side, never.

You took care of her, waking her up if she had a nightmare, holding her until she fell asleep. Abby always felt so ashamed of it.

That until she felt the need of staying by your side, not only because you were all she had but because she felt something for you that just brought her comfort and love after so much pain. Because you were the only person that could make that pain go away and she eventually accepted the reason of it, or so she said.

Abby was the first to speak about it, the one to make all the first moves, impressively after all these years considering she was always quite conservative when she had to show she cared about you.

She kissed you for the first time ever, and you cupped her face with your hands to make it last longer, she looked so pretty, with her sheepish smile and a very small red tainting her cheeks, her eyes and nose very slightly scrunched. She made you cuddle with her for the first time and you covered both of you with the blanket, you moved your legs to place then between hers and you pressed yourself on her body, almost to remember her forever. You regret it now, because it worked.

You, on the other hand, tried to make the first move when people were around, at first believing she might be shy to tell people about you because she hated those clingy couples. Then, realizing she wasn’t ready to let people know. Now you know you should've left.

You always gave her time, giving her kisses whenever people wasn’t looking, taking advantage of your friendship with her being well known by everyone to hug her and stay close to her.

She would get mad- well, not really but asking you playfully to stop because she wasn’t ready. And you always understood.

Until drunk - which later she used as an excuse - she said she could never date you, not only because you were a woman and she wasn’t “into that” but also because your personalities only fit with each other because you two met so young. Your friends laughed at it, and you wanted to kill her right there.

As if the universe wasn't on your side, abby got closer to getting hat revenge she desired so much, and you knew it wouldn’t help to make of that a bigger situation in such important moment, so you let it go. You couldn't really blame her for anything after all.

She didn't mean to feel like this about you, or anyone else, and nor you or abby could call that a behavior you could blame someone for. You were her one excepcion in life, you thought instead of complaining about it you should've enjoyed it all.

Abby apologized later that week, you didn't know it was because she went to see Owen. You wish you never knew, you wish you never asked. Back then you thought the old abby was coming back. You were more than wrong, because she never left, she just changed, like everyone else did.

It wasn't later after that when you had to broken up with her. It happened before both of your lives changed forever.

You never wanted to, but it's impossible to not regret it all knowing your life- her life could've turned different.

"You're overreacting" her arms were crossed. She straightened herself, mocking you. You couldn't scream because there were people near you, Abby's friends, all sleeping.

She had brought everyone to a random place to get her revenge, and as much as you loved her, the whole scenario was ridiculous. You didn't understand why she needed everyone on her side, until you saw it.

And maybe you were overreacting, but it wasn't the first time Abby rathered to speak with Owen instead of you. And it made your blood boil because why would she even think about him as someone she can speak to when he wasn't on her side as much as you? When he's dating someone else and she's dating you?.

"You haven't spoke to me since we came here. I just wanna know, why him?" Abby chuckled, rolling her eyes. Just that and you felt like bursting into tears. Fucking ridiculous.

"Abby, answer-" she cut you off, running a hand over her hair, down her braid. The way she took a deep breath, how she didn't take you serious, It had become a normal thing for you and only that made you realize how stupid it was. How stupid you were for letting her treat you like that.

"You can't respect that I want to keep us private. You think I'm fucking cheating on you. I don't understand what the fuck you want from me" you impulsively stepped back. Thinking about an answer that didn't make you sound like the mean one, even though you knew she was the one making all the mistakes.

"You don't want us private Abigail, and you fucking know it" you still remember the knot on your throat when you spoke, there has never been such painful feeling. "We've been dating for more than a fucking year and you haven't said you love me, not even once. I'm the one overreacting, the one being clingy, the one being desperate for love. But you know why? Because my girlfriend is terrified of loving me"

She didn't say anything. But god how she remembers it all.

"You know how insane you're making me? I saw you kissing Owen many times while dating, and you want to keep me 'private' even after a whole fucking year?" Her lips shut together, forming a pout. You knew she wanted to cry, which only made you feel worst because you were the one supposed to cry. Not her.

"You can kiss every single man on earth, but know, it will always stay the same. Good luck with all your shit, Abigail"

The scenery your eyes saw some hours later were just the confirmation you needed to leave. She was angry, and in pain. Probably you were guilty of the morbid way that men got killed. Or, maybe not, but you couldn't change the sensation of guilt building in your stomach every time abby hit his skin.

Back at the base it all got awkward between everyone. The relationship between Owen and Mel got awkward, and that was related to you and Abby.

It was a sort of love affair situation that no one ever spoke about but everyone knew it had happened. Everyone felt pity for you and Mel, which made the hate towards her grow stupidly heavily.

You despised her and that man.

So, for you and your needs, you decided to take something from her one last time.

Having her underneath you, pleading for your touch, crying your name, confessing how she regretted it all and how Owen was driving her insane. One last time, you can't make you forget it.

Neither does Abby, regretting letting you go, more than anything she’s ever regretted.

Not only has she wasted her time with Owen but she had made him waste his time with her. She could’ve had you, she could’ve been awake on your side tonight. Knowing she took all those chances away from herself, it drives her insane every day.

But oh you told her so, and you gave her thousands of chances to not fuck it all.

Those words you said to her, they’ve been stuck forever on her brain.

[heavenlyraindrops]

♱ Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Thirteen ♱

Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Thirteen Warnings: profanity Click on the first tag to see all the other chapters

♱Where the purest soul in Heaven falls for the Devil♱

[Chapter Thirteen]

♱♱♱

One month had passed. Your decision was approaching, faster than you had thought it would. What would you say?

You still didn’t know.

“I’ll be back from the extermination,” Adam said smugly, Lute crossing her arms behind him. He dropped his voice to a whisper. “Decided yet?”

“Yes,” you lied through your teeth.

“Not coming this year?” Lute smirked, unaware of your and Adam’s whispered conversation going on in front of her. Adam’s eyes slid to you, then he rolled them, making you scowl.

“No,” you said flatly. Adam’s eyes hardened.

“We’re gonna go after Lucifer’s brat’s shitty hotel first,” he sneered. “Shame you can’t be there to watch it.”

“Shame,” you replied, heart pounding against your ribcage.

You watched them disappear down the portal to Hell, along with another rush of the exterminators, eager for bloodshed, before the portal closed up completely.

You rubbed your eyes.

“Keep Charlie safe,” you muttered, as if it was a prayer, except one in a god you were slowly losing faith in.

♱♱♱

Adam was dead.

It had been almost a week since they had left for the extermination. Everyone was in such a flurry, a mess, that no one bothered to pay any attention to you or answer your questions. Sure, you were the great [name], but you were just another angel when it came to status.

Sera was stressed. Emily was in shock. You were in shock. And the last time you had seen Lute was the last time you had seen Adam.

What seemed to scare everyone to their core, however, wasn’t just Adam’s death: it was the fact that angels could die. You remembered Avery, and her missing friend. No doubt the girl was dead. You fiddled with your bracelet, before ripping it off and tossing it onto the table.

You hadn’t heard from Lucifer, either.

The front door creaked open, spilling pale light into your dim living room. You shot up as Lute entered.

“Lute, God, you’re okay,” you breathed, your concern for her shocking the both of you. Your eyes fell to her shoulder, and your heart leapt into your throat. “Where’s your arm?”

She stared at you, and you could have swore her eyes were glowing with barely restrained fury. You took her by the shoulder and steered her into the room, sitting her down where you were before.

“Do you need anything?”

She stared at you, and you wondered if she was ever going to speak. And then, finally, she did.

“Water.”

“On it,” you said, rushing to the kitchen for a glass.

You thrust it towards her, a few droplets spilling over the edge and rolling down the glass. She took it with her remaining hand. You sat next to her.

“Tell me everything.”

She downed the water, but her voice was still raspy. You couldn’t place the aura that surrounded her, but you could see the anger in her tensed muscles, her furrowed brow. “Adam’s dead,” she muttered, setting the glass down. “We were fucking winning, then Lucifer showed up and…” she rubbed her eyes, albeit aggressively. You noticed them glistening with unshed tears. “That stupid child, demon, thing- stabbed the shit out of him.” She looked away again, as if to hide her grief from you. You rubbed her back soothingly, and she tensed up, turning back to look up at you.

“If you ever need to talk,” you murmured. “I’m here.”

She sighed, doubling over. You decided to prompt her to speak with another question.

“What happened to your arm?” You pressed gently. Her lip curled.

“That bitch Vagina-“

“Huh?”

“Vaggie,” she seethed. She buried her head in her hand, shoulders shaking. You pressed your arm against hers, trying to offer her as much comfort as possible. She wouldn’t elaborate on the single name she had mentioned, and you wondered if Vaggie had cut her arm off.

“Adam told me something,” Lute said abruptly. “Before he died.” She looked at you, and you could feel your heart rate picking up, beating so hard it was painful. You stopped yourself from pulling away in case it would seem suspicous.

“What did he say?” You asked gently, doing your best to keep the tremor out of your voice. She shook her head soundlessly. “That’s fine. You can tell me when you’re ready.”

A few more minutes of sitting in comfortable silence before she had stood up, mumbling that she had to go. You showed her outside, before hugging her fiercely while still being mindful of her arm.

She’d left and you went back inside, staring out the window and watching her fly away into the sky. Your stomach churned.

You looked down at your clenched fists. He was dead. Lute’s affirmation had let it sink in for you properly now. You felt sick and relieved at the same time.

Because your secret died with him.

You stumbled to the bathroom. You were going to throw up- again, and you did, all into the toilet. You flushed it, slumping down onto the bathroom floor and breathing heavily. Adam was dead. You didn’t have to marry him. You didn’t have to choose. No one in the world knew anymore- except you, and Lucifer. You stood up with trembling legs, scraping yourself together and steadying yourself on the sink, staring at your reflection. Your face had gone pale.

He was dead. He was really dead.

He wouldn’t barge into your house without knocking like he used to, anymore. He wouldn’t scream your name down the street. He wouldn’t laugh the raucous way he did, that you had gotten so used to. You stifled any regretful feelings, pushing them down, not allowing yourself to cry. He was an asshole to you. It was for the best.

You went to the living room, and your eyes fell on Lute’s half-empty glass. You suddenly remembered the bracelet, the one you had tossed onto the table where the glass now sat, your link between you and Lucifer. Your eyes skimmed across the table to the spot you had last left it, and…

It wasn’t there.

♱♱♱

A/N: second chapter of the double release! Damn exams are killing me. Njoyy (Coco if ur reading this. I made the cliffhanger bcuz ur such a nosey bitch 😡😡)

hey guys I thought I posted this but turned out that I didn’t and it was just sitting in my drafts like an abandoned child

[dearmrshudson]

The post of saddest(?) supernatural moment gave me the idea to maka a list of my own... You know, an honest list which will not push any agenda or exclude one of the main character completely to forcefully feed to a romantic pair which does not even exist.

so here it goes-

10. Dean's reaction after Sam's death in 13x21 :

This one is so nominal and insignificant to be in this list and not one of top moments for a lot, but this scene ripped my heart open when I saw it for the first time. It manages to show us how Dean's whole world will literally fall apart and make him an empty vessel if Sam is gone and he can do nothing about it - and Jensen manages to portray it with just a walk, two blank eyes and then one drop of tear. Kudos.

9. Church Scene in 'Sacrifice' (8x23):

Anyone who has not cried in this scene? Perfeftly shows the core of the show, the deep love between two brothers- despite all the reasons, all the idiological differences, all the mature discussion and all- Sam is the baby brother of Dean; at the end he needs Dean to be there as a big bro, to tell him to let it go, to clutch him in his chest. Ultimately they will always choose each other and nothing else will come between them.

8. Dean's death in 9x23:

One of the saddest death of Dean, and perhaps it comes to this list because of the build-up and drama follows this. Both had their own reasons for the tension they had this whole season, but when the tragedy comes it hits so hard that all those logics fell apart. It scares to peep in Sam's headspace at this time of dean's dying- imagine you discarding the person you love the most as you are reasonably angry with him, and in a few days he is dying in your arms when you have hardly talked out your differences.

7. Why don’t you believe in us too (14x12) :

Probably should come much later in this list, but this scene stood out in my eyes because it was such a fresh air in the terrible plotless mimicry that SPN had become in later seasons. The scene after ages which sums up Sam and Dean, the codependent brothers whom we had forgotten. Such a long time after we see Sam the little brother, witness the emotional turmoil he was going through silently and how it exploded. The only scene which makes season 14 worth remembering. Also Jared just nailed this scene!

6.) Dead or Alive (3x16):

This scene breaks my heart in pieces. Dean bravely going for the last fight before the horrible death he will be facing. And he trying to cheer up baby bro, he wants the last memory with his brother to be in this car- singing along together... How his face slowly glooms at the end and his eyes full of fear... Early seasons really were gems!

5. Sam in Mystery spot (3x11) :

Undoubtedly one of the best SPN episode with perfect blend of mystery, fun, laughter, tragedy and emotion... The funny vibe of the episode ends in a moment when we see Sam is not waking up from the nightmare loop. Then we see a robot- a scary robot who only wants to get his brother back at any cost. This episode is yet another example of how Sam loves Dean just as fiercely as Dean does, and he is not any less codependent.

4. Barn scene and alone Sam (15x20) :

God! What can I say about this!

Just want to add, Sam wandering alone in the bunker after creamating Dean hurts me equally.

3. John's death (2x01):

Cannot forget this one. This episode happens to be another favourite of mine, and the way John sacrifices himself for his son proves that a father can go to any extent for his children. The farewell scene of John - where he asks for forgiveness and goodbye to dean without him understanding brings tears to my eyes. Such a beautiful acting by JDM and so realistic portrayal of a flawed, helpless and loving father.

2. End of Season 5 (5x22)

The ground was set, the battle was about to begin, the ultimate faceoff between Lucifer and Michael was going to start- then what happens? A stubborn idiot boy with a muscle car and hellbent attitude comes in between- knowing that he cannot survive this- just because one of these celestial entities have captured his brother as a vessel and he won’t leave his brother alone. Till his last drop of blood he keeps on trying- trying to reach his brother who is trapped under something much bigger- keeps on telling that It's okay, he is not alone, his big brother is here. And guess what, he succeed. His brother broke free the bind of one of the strongest entity of universe and fought. The climax scene gives me goosebump always followed by a bunch of grief and saddness the ending carries. Had season 5 been the last season of SPN, and this be the exact way the series ended, I would absolutely have no regret!

1. Sammy's first Death (2x21):

No matter how many sad scenes are perfectly executed in SPN, nothing can exceed the emotion of this one. Jensen will also not be able to exceed the level of performance be set in this particular scene. Period.

So this is it... I must have excluded many. And turns out my list is full of Sam and Dean only and I am also not unbiased 🤣🤣 Well, there are sad scenes that do not involve only the brothers and I still like them, but not my top 10. Maybe have to make list of top 11 to 20 in order to include them. 😁

Please share your favourite saddest top 10 as well.

[astroyongie]

What are you choosing ?

Note: hey everyone! This is  little something that I have constructed in a way for you to see if you really know yourself but also as a way to heal and understand your inner desires and needs. This is a part of what we call shadow working, hopefully it will help. you are free to do this quietly, or if you want to share with me, feel free to do so <3

How it works?: please choose one option between the two and try to argument within yourself why you chose that 

This or that ?

Question 1

an apology from your father 

a hug from your mother

Question 2

being loved

being able to love

Question 3

your father choosing family over work

holding your childhood pet one last time 

Question 4

a good night kiss

your hair getting brushed and braided

Question 5

the ability to forgive yourself 

finally being heard and understood in your family 

Question 6

“i am proud of you” from your mother

“i love you” from your father

Question 7

reading you favorite childhood book for the first time

a letter from that one friend you one day never heard from again

Question 8

crying in your mother’s arms 

yelling at her all the things you were too afraid to speak out loud

Question 9

not feeling constantly lonely

 not feeling constantly misunderstood

now please choose one number between 1-6. pick the one that you are currently feeling most attracted to. and read your message: 

1- Yeshe Tsogyal: you will be able to overcome all of the obstacles you are currently facing. allow your spiritual guides to guide you through this and trust the process, the path that you are in. surround yourself with the people you know bring you only light into your life, allow yourself to trust them more and to trust yourself as well. by working on your spiritual side you will be able to overcome your shadow self.

2- Yogoni: Of course there’s a lot of changes happening in your life at the moment, but keep in mind that sometimes a door will close in order for another to be opened. trust your path and tell yourself if thighs aren't meant to be because life is trying to limit the pains in your life. stay faithful to yourself and your healing oath, as long as you stay authentic to yourself, you will be able to overcome things 

3- Terra Mater: your mental and spiritual path does not unfold like most people, it is taking a different way but you need to trust the process, as your spiritual guides love you unconditionally and they will help you find peace of mind. follow the new ideas and accept the changement that is happening in your life. your manifestation is strong, use it wisely. you know that goal you have? grasp it. Even if people say that it's stupid and impossible for you to have it, don't let it go and fight for your desires.

4- Beatitude: don't be afraid to show the true you. The only way to heal your inner conflicts and the pain is by accepting and loving who you are. even when things seem so hard to reach, keep walking down the rightful path and trust life. all the difficulties are going to bring you to wisdom and the right path.  

5- Biche: You are only a child that has been hurt. I am so sorry that you had to go through this hard thing. but your energy is able to overcome all of this negativity. you don't need to become something that you are not, your spiritual light is already warm and soft. keep yourself true to your inner core and things will become easier 

6- Volva: your spiritual power can heal your dark self way better than what you think. It's time for you to travel through the spiritual world and engage yourself more. don't try to control what is happening and allow it to unfold before you. instead work on something tangible, on something that will help you healing from all the pain you have suffered

[terr-hedgehog]

To bitch or not to bitch,, that is the question

Zooms ins below lolll

[clotpolesonly]

on fathers, homes, loyalties, and defectors

The Raven Boys ch 7 // Dream Thieves ch 5 // The Raven Boys ch 36 // Dream Thieves ch 5

[pineappical]

so that finale huh.

[chappellrroan]

it's almost like if i dont let the whole world know about my new hyperfixtation i will burst into flames

[truckstoptigers]

i hold so much more anger than anyone around me realizes

[m4niackkyun]

Hi. (Announcement in the tags)

[todayisafridaynight]

i solemnly swear not to write a fic with a similar premise as one ive done in the past but also i like it when people slow dance.....

[heavenlyraindrops]

♱ Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Twelve ♱

Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Twelve Warnings: profanity Click on the first tag to see all the other chapters

♱Where the purest soul in Heaven falls for the Devil♱

[Chapter Twelve]

You set your phone down on the counter as someone pounded hard on your front door. You flinched, immediately recognising the knocks.

You opened it, standing in the doorway and blocking the entrance before smiling thinly. “Adam. Lute. To what do I owe this displeasure?”

Adam arched an eyebrow. “Well someone’s gotten cocky,” he sneered, trying to brush past you. You put your foot in the way, making him stop and whirl around.

“The fuck’s your problem?” Lute snapped, storming forward. “Let us in.”

“Back off. You’re not coming inside until you tell me what you want.” You put your hand on her chest, pushing her back. She blanched, and looked at Adam helplessly.

Adam’s expression darkened as he leaned in to whisper. “Are you forgetting what I know?”

You bunched up his collar in your fist, dragging him in even closer. “There’s still one month left before I decide. You tell, I fall, and you’ll never fucking marry me.” You released him and he stumbled back a little, face hard, but you could tell you had frazzled him as you stood aside to let them in.

“Go in, then,” you said flatly. They both flashed triumphant smiles at you.

“Where’re the hellspawn?”

“Why?”

“We just wanna talk to them,” Adam said, smiling innocently as if he hadn’t been threatening you five seconds ago. His lips moved, mouthing more threats as if he had no shame in blackmailing someone.

“Upstairs,” you said reluctantly, then jabbed a finger in his direction. “And if you lay a hand on them…”

“Pinky promise,” came the reply, thrown over his shoulder as he sauntered up the stairs. Lute glanced back at you, her frown deepening.

You sat down at the kitchen counter, an internal debate raging within you. A letter lay on your right, next to your elbow. You wondered if you should have asked Charlie to deliver it to Lucifer for you, or not.

You sighed, shutting it away in a drawer.

♱♱♱

It had been hours since Charlie and Vaggie had left, shortly after Lute and Adam had stormed out. You’d waved them off, wishing them good luck. As you shook Charlie’s hand, your hand clamped around hers, pulling her in to whisper.

“Between you and me, love,” you muttered. “You’re more than just right in this.” You hesitated. “Tell Lu…” you mumbled the rest of the sentence, trailing off into a volume barely audible as you chickened out. She blinked at you, befuddled, before her lips stretched into another smile as she pulled you into a hug.

“Thank’s, [name],” she said. Vaggie nodded approvingly from behind her, before they both turned around and left.

You watched them fade into the distance, before stumbling back inside. You took the letter out of the drawer and crumpled it up, throwing it in the bin. You felt like you were about to throw up.

“Fuck,” you gasped.

♱♱♱

“Emily? How was the trial?”

You blinked down at the seraph, who gazed up at you solemnly. You could tell there were angry tears behind her eyes, threatening to spill out. “Tell me you didn’t know,” she said, voice trembling. You took her hand, pulling her inside and setting her at the couch.

“Didn’t know what?” You asked, gently and cautiously. At the same time, the door swung open again, and Adam barged in.

“Sugar tits, we fuckin’ won,” he cackled, grabbing your wrist. “I kicked those cunts back downstairs where they belong-“ he paused, eyes sliding over to Emily.

You gulped.

Emily stood up, hands bunched up into fists. “You did, didn’t you,” she hissed. You let out a small breath.

“Emily, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“She’s talking about the exterminations,” Adam rolled his eyes, slinging an arm around your shoulder with a hand on his hip as he stared Emily down. You stiffened, looking at him as if to say ‘what the hell did you do?’ But refrained yourself from saying anything aloud.

She blanched at the look on your face. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t anyone tell me?” She stretched her arms out wide, and her wings stretched with her. Your heart sank.

“No one is supposed to know about the exterminations except for the exorcists,” you said calmly as you could, despite a slight shake in your voice as you straightened up and pulled your shoulders back.

“You know, and you’re not an exorcist,” she retorted, eyes accusing. You stepped back.

“[name]’s special,” Adam sneered, looking at you. You couldn’t meet his stare.

“It’s for the greater good. Are you really questioning Sera’s judgment?”

Emily’s shoulders sank. “You don’t believe that,” she said, as if she was trying to convince herself instead of simply making a statement. You gulped.

Did you agree with the exterminations? You had never really thought about it. But if they hadn’t existed you never would have met-

“Emily, I don’t like them either,” you said, leaning forward and gripping her shoulders, desperation oozing from your like an aura. “But Heaven needs to keep the pure- the good souls, safe from the bad.” You felt a stab at your heart even as you said it, because saying those words made you feel like you were betraying Charlie and Vaggie, but you pressed on. “Emily, no one enjoys the exterminations.”

Adam scoffed from behind you, stalking forward and yanking you back. “Oh please, sugar tits.” He looked hard at Emily. “The exorcists love the extermination. It’s the perfect form of entertainment!” His eyes and grin widened, and you flinched away as his gaze snapped back to you again. “And don’t pretend like you’re against them, sugar. You wouldn’t have met your demon boyfriend if it weren’t for them.” His tone was lined with hurt, as if getting with Lucifer was the biggest betrayal you could have done to him.

And, you realized, in a way, it was.

“What?” Emily said, wondering if she had heard him right. You could feel your face heat up, your golden blood turning to fire in your veins.

“I said,” Adam clarified, “if it wasn’t for the exterminations, she’d be bored as fuck here.” Emily frowned, but you could tell she believed him. “What’d you think I said?” He didn’t wait for an answer, turning back to you. “Don’t act like you threw yourself at the chance to come along with us down to Hell.”

You chewed your lip furiously, mind racing. “Don’t you dare throw me under the bus.”

“Why fuckin’ shouldn’t I?” He hissed, eyes glittering darkly. You could sense the meaning underneath, cutting you like a double edged sword.

“You know what?” You said, flatly. “You’re just pissy that your dick is so fucking tiny, Like- opposite the size of your fatass ego, which is so big it’s fucking obese, by the way- that you lost three women to a guy who lives in a dimensional oven.” You jabbed your finger at him. “I’d rather date the Devil himself than a fucking cunt like you,” you scoffed. “At least he’d last more than thirty seconds.”

Emily stared at you blankly, amazed, not ever having heard you swear so much, and also by your blatant blasphemy. You pulled back, smoothing down your shirt, satisfied at Adam’s shocked expression. You glanced at her.

“I wouldn't actually,” you reassured her, lying straight through your teeth.

♱♱♱

A/N: first of my double chapter release. Two chapters in one day isn’t that crazy?!.?, turns out my 400th follower was my friend stalking me… they read all my smut. I’m cooked 😁 Coco if ur reading this… get off my blog rn

I’m giving up on the taglist cause it don’t work anymore sorry guys 😔

[atlantic-riona]

big fan of things ending. for good, even.

[lilgynt]

naturally i’m gonna be very upset at 6:09 am after an all-nighter over my brother and his actions

[bamboozled-distress]

do you ever find a character that is literally so you that every flaw about them that even makes other people in the fandom dislike the character is literally one of your biggest flaws and you relate to them so much it’s borderline unhealthy

[pussy-ache]

probably should talk to my sister sooner or later