FTFO chapter 40, spoilers
HOW IS EVERYONE DOING ON THIS FINE DAY gonna throw up
From themoment I read the title I
I just knew
I'm so glad Nightmare has been saved n the OT has been repaired!!!
YELLING AND SOBBING WHATTHHEFUCK WAHSSTHATH ENDJINGG
ImgonnaSCREAMandSOBandCRYandTHROWUP I'm shAKING as I type this WHATTHEFUCJ
When I SAID INK WAS GONNA LOSE A LEG FROM THE BOMB THIS WAS NOT WHAT I WAS ENVISIONING WHAT TNE H FCUK
DEATH GRIP ON THE NO MAJOR CHARACTER DEATHS THIS IS THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME GOING RN WHAYTHE HOLTSHIT
IwANTXGASTEE DEAADDDDD I WANT HI M DEAD AND GONNNNEDEAAAADDDD
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it mattered because when my brother asked me what if this is the happiest you'll ever be? the best you'll ever get? the thing i felt was fear, not peace. everybody thought you were so perfect for me. even i thought you were "helping me grow". i had to challenge every internal clock. make myself more thoughtful, more kind, more beautiful.
i told my therapist it was good because i like the changes i made and there's something so strong about saying i did that. the problem is that i can like the difference all i want, but i changed for you. something akin to getting your name tattooed, all my progress is stamped with fuck you.
it was the happiest i'd ever been and also the best i'd ever gotten. i would still get in the car and think what the fuck just happened.
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every time i watch anything with him in it (admittingly, predominantly from the Dropout app), i am reminded that Lou Wilson is the most handsome man to have ever lived. like, objectively. he just is. i will hear no arguments for any other person to be ranked higher. Lou Wilson: whose face single-handedly shows humanity can go no higher in beauty. he is THE most attractive man in the world. argue with the wall lmao
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