#gavin made me cry also

[u3pxx]

a collection of aa sprite redraw requests from the bird app :^]c

like my work? consider supporting me on ko-fi!

[soup-scope]

we finally got canon ages for some of the redacted boys!!!

Samuel Collins- 29 *when turned* (technically 44 ig)

Vincent Solaire - 20 *when turned* (technically 43 ig)

Avior- Coalesced 36 years ago

Gavin- Coalesced 33 years ago

Aaron- 33 years old

David Shaw- 30 years old

Asher Talbot- 30 years old

Milo Greer- 30 years old

Lasko Moore- 29 years old

Elliot- 29 years old(???) (timeline just states he was adopted 29 years ago)

Huxley- 26

Caelum- Coalesced 24 years ago (caelum is still very much mentally a child tho. don’t be weird)

Damien- 24 years old

[violexides]

God. komaeda really was a great character huh. (plus, ramblings about my favorite 'character types' and queerness in DR in tags).

[clowngremlin]

On the bus heading home from gavin's house....I always feel like no matter how long I'm there for, it's never enough time with him and I already miss him so much...

[honeyflies05]

WEEWOO WEEWOOO [baby crying] MY LEG! [screaming]

“hello 9-1-1 what is your emergency?”

ANYWAYS WE’RE BAKC BABIEEEE!!

(shameless plus for my twitter @/honeyflies05 go follow me over there I’m more active)

HELLO!!!!!!

MADDIE NO

why is she being so nice??🤨

she’s dying

I’m calling it

WHO CAME

who are you??

“WHICH ONE” AHHHHH

this hurts!

EDDIE DO MORE DIAZ!!!!!

oh SHIII we’re starting right away okay!!

THIS GUY!

ALRIGHT COWBOY

MADDIE’S A NURSE! check on my bingo card

the camera’s shaking I’m calling that as wacky camera work

eVaN

GAVIN MCHUGH!!!!!

it’s THE shirt

they showed their attention to buck and not Daniel ooooooo

“I’m not a firefighter?” SCREAMING

he has a couch???🤨🤨🤨

THE TSUNAMI???? THE TSUNAMI!!!!

he’s a science teacher I’m calling it

if I see Doug-

WACKY CAMERA WORK! ITS GETTING SCRATCHED OFF

no,,,

PUNCH HIM

ugh ad breaks sUCK

i wanna know where the “THIS GUY” came from because it was SO FUNNY in the clip

i stopped working on my science project because of this show

down horrendously bad

seeing Doug: BOMBASTIC side eye

hello real world!!

“oh my god, Evan” SHUT UP!!!! SHUT!!! UP!!!!!

chim blames himself✅

buck looks so confused andichdhdhs

DANIEL HATES HIM TOO WOOOOOOO

if buck doesn’t punch him in this episode I will

all of these flashbacks to my favorite episodes WOOOHOOOOO

“since when do gurneys have fingers” EJDIFJDSAAAAAAAAAA

Daniel is so mid oh my godddd💀

“who are you” SCREAMING

this wacky camera work!! camera person

ARE WE GONNA LEARN

DAMMIT

coma dream! roll credits!!

“figure something out” I KNOW WHAT HE HAS TO DO!

buck don’t kill yourself

“you’re not married… you really should be!”

DID BOBBY DIE

NAUUURRRRRR

IS THIS WHERE HE CODES????

CHIMNEY NOOOOO

where is Eddie

where is chris

where are my people

ATHENA!!

oh shi real world

of course bobby would blame himself

bobby nash and athena grant-nash are Buck’s parents

“he has to be” oh this is so ao3

HEN!!!!

respiratory failure! woohoo

THE MUSIC

ECMO

aLBERT!!!!

bobby with the rosary😭😭😭😭😭😭

chim judging the buckley’s yayyyyy

EDDIE!!!!

NOT THE PLANE CRASH

“the crazy just sucks you in!”

EDDIE DIAZ!!!!

….chris….

NAUUURRR

NOT THE DIAZ PARENTS

cHRIS

this is our first Carla appearance in a while

“can he hear me” THAT MAKES ME WANNA CRY

“YOURE GONNA BE OKAY” IM GONNA SOB

“you have to come back” I understand why Aisha cried

hen figuring out the coma dream >>>

BOBBY!!

the ambulance still being there😭😭

damn doesn’t the 118 have other patients???

MAY SAYING BUCK IS BOBBY’S SON IM GONNA CRY

buck being so stubborn that may says he’s gonna be okay💀

Buckley parents make me mad

the plane!!!

WHO IS THAT RUNNING

running in nightmares be like:

,,,Bobby??

I’m actually so confused

IF MY SISTER don’t SHUT UP IM TRYING TO WATCH A SHOW

please HIS HOSPITAL ROOM???

“ooo I busted out the rosary must be serious!” I AM SO UNSERIOUS RN

yeah ur parents are nice to you but your entire life is messed up

IM ABOUT TO THROW MY PHONE SHUT UP MY SISTER!!!!!

if I miss smth it’s because of her loud ass mouth

how do we only have 20 minutes left so much needs to happen

we only got started!!!

i need to see Eddie break down

bobby and athena are so Buck’s parents

FULL NAME ATHENA IS MAD

athena will get this kid to wake up by sheer WILL AND DETERMINATION U GO MOTHER

#angelabassetdeservedtheoscar

HIM BEING ABLE TO HEAR ATHENA’S VOICE IM GONNA CRY

“I fixed you!” WHAT IF I COMMIT DIE RN

BUCK COLLAPSING IN THE TSUNAMI EPISODE SKDICHXHZHAAAAA

“so basically you were buck!” IM CRYING

IS THIS FIX YOU BY COLDPLAY????

IT IS.

“boy am I gonna feel guilty about that one” WHAT IF I CRY

“where do you think you’re going??!!”

“home.” I AM SO!!!

if they get Eddie to try to keep him by saying “I love you” you will never hear from me again

THE CUTOFF OF FIX YOU BY COLDPLAY SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i have an unreal attachment to that song yall have nO IDEA

where!! is!! eddie!!

i need Eddie to give me something to break down about

THEYRE PULLING THE PLUG???

if they really were Bobby would be there

DANIEL BLAMING HIM?? JESUS

EVAN BREATHE EVAN

buck in scrubs,,,,

FIX YOU COMING BACK!!!!

HEY THE HATCHET!!

THE BREATH

YEAAAAAAAAA

TO FIX YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

THEY DIDNT SHOW US HIM WAKING UP!???

he stays with Eddie!!

CHRIS!!!

“I never made it inside the classroom… which kinda tracks” WHAT IF I CRY

hen being exactly the same >>>>

chim having his emotional moment >>

“let’s get you set up on the couch!” AAAAAAAAAAAAA

i don’t like the Buckley parents being so insufferable

OOOO BOBBY CENTRIC EPISODE NEXT MONDAY???

farmer wants a wife YEEHAWWW🤠

[zegrasdrysdale]

Could you write a smut with Ethan Edwards like after a bad game or something? Thankssss!!

[ make me forget ] e. edwards

paring : Ethan Edwards x fem!reader

summary : Ethan confides in his girlfriend after a rough loss in the Frozen Four

warning(s) : smut ! very much more love making than fucking, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy), p in v sex, blowjob, use of nicknames during sex (pretty girl, baby, etc.), little bit of dirty talk

author’s note : waited until the umich season ended before i tackled this request because if they had lost in the frozen four (which they did), i thought it would be the perfect plot for this request. the way they lost was really rough so be prepared for sad ethan for a lil bit

༺═──────────────═༻

Her heart breaks when the final buzzer goes off. Boston College is quick to celebrate their four-to-nothing win over Michigan. Her eyes are on Ethan as he stands with Dylan and Tyler while the Duke boys shed some tears.

The tears that begin to fall down Ethan's cheeks while he stands with his teammates are her last straw. The tears that threatened to spill over onto her cheeks begin to roll. She quickly wipes them away so Ethan doesn't look over and see them.

All of the Michigan boys huddle near the bench as they watch another team move onto the finals for the third year in a row.

It breaks her heart that they have fought so hard for the past three years and no national title to show for it. They deserve it more than they know or realize at the moment.

Michigan shakes hands with Boston College at center ice before BC goes back to the locker room to celebrate the win. The Michigan boys raise their sticks for the last time this season, and for the last time for some of the boys. She shows her support by clapping and banging on the glass in front of her as they head down the tunnel.

Ethan looks at her as he waits to go down the tunnel. She shoots him a small smile that's mixed with fondness and sadness. If he smiles back at her, she can't see it because of the way his helmet sits on his head. His face is shiny and she can’t tell if it’s because he’s sweating or if it’s because he’s been crying.

Hopefully it’s because he’s been sweating because she doesn’t know if she can handle more tears from Ethan.

She makes her way to the hotel that she and the other girlfriends are staying at, which is also the hotel that the boys are staying at. None of them are really in the mood to hang around the arena to wait for their boyfriends.

Ethan knows her room number. It just might be a little bit because he comes knocking. He’s going to shower then spend some time with his teammates because this is the last time that Team 102 will be Team 102.

Some of his teammates are going to sign with their NHL team. She knows Frank is going to the NHL immediately like Luke did last year. He’ll sign within a day or two after they get back to Michigan. Dylan and Gavin have both said they’re probably going to sign with their teams too. A handful of other guys haven’t made an official decision yet but she’s sure that more will be leaving.

Then it’ll just be Ethan and Mark left from their class that came in almost four years ago.

Once she’s back in her hotel room that’s a few blocks from the arena, she finally relaxes. She pulls off the hat she was wearing as well as Ethan’s Michigan jacket. With a sigh, she flops onto her back on the bed.

If she’s feeling like this, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling. It sucks that they’re not moving onto the finals after getting shutout. It especially sucks that it’s now three years in a row that they’ve made it to the Frozen Four and haven’t been to the finals.

Like she said, she can’t even begin to imagine how the boys are feeling after that game.

It’s nearly two hours after the game ends when there’s a very soft knock on her door. If she was sleeping or had in her AirPods then she wouldn’t have heard it. The TV is playing at a low volume so she was able to hear the knock.

When she swings the door open, she sees a very upset Ethan Edwards on the other side.

She pouts and pulls him into a hug, which pulls him into the room. The door swings shut behind Ethan. “I’m so sorry, Eddie,” she softly says into his ear. “I wish I could do something.”

“I know,” he replies. His voice is hoarse like all he’s been doing is crying. It breaks her heart a little more. “Needed to see you. I tried slipping away but coach made us stay for a little bit after we were all showered.”

She pulls back from the hug, leaving her arms draped around his neck. Ethan’s avoiding eye contact with her. It’s what he does when he’s upset.

When she pushes his hair out of his face, he leans down and puts his forehead on her shoulder. Her fingers find a home in his damp locks and holds him. His arms wrap around her waist.

“I’m so tired of feeling like this,” Ethan confesses after a few moments of silence. “It’s been three fucking years. First it was Denver, then it was Quinnipiac, and now it’s Boston College. Three years, three different teams. I’m tired.”

“I know, E,” she coos as she presses a kiss to his temple. “I can’t even begin to imagine how you feel. I know how rough it’s been for you and the guys.”

Ethan lifts his head up and finally looks at her. All she sees behind his eyes is sadness. She has to bite her lip from crying because his eyes are usually so bright. They are so dark right now.

“I have one more year,” he says. “One. I don’t think I can handle it if I’m in this position again next year. I probably won’t sign with the Devils this season so I can do this for one more year but I don’t think I can do this again. Feel like this again.”

She watches tears spill over his eyelids onto his cheeks. She dries his cheeks with her thumbs and gives him the smallest of smiles. “You’re going to lead your team to a national title next year as a senior, E,” she assures him. “It’s your year.”

Ethan nods without saying a word, but the way her eyes flicker to her lips tells her everything she needs to know. He grabs her hands off his face and loosely laces their fingers together.

“Can you do me a favor?” Ethan asks. She raises her eyebrows in confusion. “Can you just … help me forget for a little bit? I need to get my mind off of the last few hours.”

She blinks, not even surprised at his request. “Ethan, you are upset right now and you’re allowed to be,” she begins to say to him. “I just don’t want to take advantage of you since you’re not in the right mindset.”

He drops his forehead to hers. His eyes close. “Please, baby,” he whispers. “Make me forget. I need you to make me forget.”

It’s not like she was going to say no. She just needed to make sure it’s what he really wanted before she started something.

Ethan picks his head up and meets her eyes. She glances between them to make sure he’s okay before she pulls him down into a kiss.

The kiss starts out soft and slow but quickly turns rough and needy. Ethan’s hands rest on her sides and he lightly grips her waist so she can’t move away. Not that she was planning on going anywhere.

If Ethan wants her to help him forget the last few hours then she will.

She presses herself flush against Ethan’s chest and can feel the growing bulge against her thigh. Her fingers curl in his locks to keep him from breaking the kiss. She does walk forward a bit so Ethan’s back is pressed against the wall next to the door.

Her hands snake down from his hair and down his chest until they rest on the waistband of his dress pants. Ethan sucks her bottom lip between his teeth and pulls back, letting her lip snap back into place. She looks up at him and bites the same lip.

“You’re hot when you’re needy,” she tells Ethan as she begins to undo the button on his pants. “Just so you’re aware.”

“You’re hot all the time,” Ethan retorts as she finally gets the button undone. “Especially when you wear my clothes.” His comment confirms he saw her in his jacket during the game.

She just smiles at him and untucks his shirt from his pants before pulling him into another kiss.

Ethan pulls off the suit jacket he’s wearing and lets it fall to the floor. His hands come up to cup her jaw as he returns her kisses, each one getting needier and deeper.

After a few more kisses, she reluctantly pulls back. She notices how swollen and red his lips already are and she can’t help but smile at the sight of how disheveled he already looks.

Once she takes him all in, she sinks down to her knees in front of him. Ethan leans his head back and mumbles a “fuck” as she pulls his dress pants down so they pool around his ankles. His boxers are next and his semi pops out. Ethan ends up kicking the clothes away as well as his shoes.

She takes him in her hand and pumps him a few times. “Shit, baby,” Ethan breathes out. “You look so pretty on your knees for me.”

She sends him a smile before she wraps her lips around the reddening tip. Slowly, she takes his dick in her mouth and looks up at him. Ethan runs his fingers through her hair and pushes a loose piece behind her ear so her face is clear.

For once, she loves being able to do this for Ethan. He’s always focused on her pleasure and making sure that she is taken care of. She gets to return the favor. It’s not very often she gets to do this for him.

One of her hands rests on his thigh and the other slides up under his button-up. Her hand rests on his stomach for a moment before sliding as close to his chest as she can get. His hand rests on hers over his shirt.

She moves her head and sucks gently, being cautious of her teeth. She still gets flashbacks to the first time she blew him sometimes when her teeth accidentally got involved and there was almost a hospital trip that night.

Honestly, it’s probably why he rarely lets her blow him at this point in their relationship. It was a year before he let her try again.

Ethan’s hips roll slowly and he hits the back of her throat. She relaxes her jaw and throat as he begins to fuck her face. Soft pants pass Ethan’s lips as she hollows out her cheeks and lightly sucks. Her tongue swirls around his tip every so often.

“Baby, you keep doing that and I’m going to come before either of us are ready,” Ethan tells her.

She pulls off his dick with a pop and licks her lips. “Then we better move to the bed,” she replies as she stands up. “So you can fuck me instead of coming from a blowjob against a wall.”

Ethan’s eyes widen and he crashes their lips together. He hums softly and begins to walk toward the bed. She loses her t-shirt and her leggings are around her knees when she falls onto her back. The kiss breaks and she stares up at him.

He unbuttons his shirt and she pulls off her leggings. She is left in her bra and panties, but she’ll let Ethan take them off because it’s one of his favorite things to do when they have sex.

She moves back on the bed until her head hits the pillows. A completely naked Ethan crawls onto the mattress until he’s settled between her bent knees. One of his hands cups her jaw and he instigates a soft kiss. She wraps her hand around his wrist.

“I love you,” she mumbles. “I’ve loved you from year one and I’ll love you after next year. No matter what.”

Ethan smiles against her lips and she can’t help but smile against his. He pulls back and meets her eyes. “I love you,” he tells her. “I love that you’re here. It can’t be easy for you either.”

She shakes her head and traces Ethan’s cheekbones and jaw with thee fingers. “It sucks seeing you guys come so close and not getting the championship,” she admits. “I hate seeing you so upset, Eddie. It breaks my heart.”

“Gonna win one next year,” Ethan tells her as he leans in and presses kisses to her jaw. “For you. I’m gonna raise that trophy for you, baby.”

She smiles and wraps her arms around his neck. “Good,” she giggles. “You’d look hot with that trophy above your head.”

Ethan laughs and pulls back to look at her. His hair falls into his face as he looks down at her. “Then I’m definitely winning it,” he replies as she pushes his hair out of his face. “Right now though, I need to get you naked and get inside of you.”

He pulls her up so she is sitting up with her legs wrapped around his waist. She laughs when he reaches around her and unhooks her bra. He throws it to the floor before he kisses her. She falls back so her head hits the pillows again.

Ethan hovers over her and slithers a hand between them until it slides into her panties. He cups her core and she gasps against his mouth. “Eddie,” she breathes out.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he tells her. “Such a good girl for me being so wet. You want me that bad?”

She nods and whines when Ethan plays with her clit. “I wanna ride you,” she tells him. “Help you forget the game tonight like you want me to.”

He pulls back from the kiss and meets her eyes. “Yeah?” he asks. “Wanna ride me, pretty girl?”

With an eager nod, she manages to flip them over so she is straddling Ethan’s thighs. Ethan stares up at her with a shocked look on his face as she runs her hands from his stomach to his chest. “Let me take care of you, E,” she tells him. “Make you feel good.”

Ethan nods with his wide eyes.

She pulls her panties off, the lace ruined from how wet she was before she pulled them off. She straddles Ethan’s waist once she’s completely naked. His hands run up and down her sides for a second while she leans down and kisses his jaw.

After a second of this, she gets on her knees and grabs his dick. She lines him up with her entrance and Ethan’s hand rests on her waist. She slowly sinks down on his dick with a sigh.

No mather how many times they do this, she is still shocked with how big he is as he fills her up. She’ll never get over how he manages to fit inside of her every time.

She drops her head back as she slowly fills herself with Ethan’s dick. “That’s it, baby,” Ethan says. “You take my cock so well. Look so pretty sitting on my cock.”

She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth as Ethan bottoms out inside of her. His words shoot straight to her core. Ethan traces her sides for a second before he helps her begin to roll her hips. She sighs as he moves in and out of her.

“Fuck,” she gasps as she moves her hip. “Eddie.”

One of Ethan’s hands snakes between them and rubs her clit. She lets out a soft moan as Ethan works her close to an orgasm.

The bed creaks below them as she picks up speed. Her hands rest on his chest to keep her balance. Ethan’s lips are parted and his eyes are closed as she rides his dick.

It’s not a minute later when Ethan wraps his arms around her waist and rolls until he’s hovering over her. She looks up at him and smiles. Ethan mirrors the smile and slowly begins to roll his hips into her.

His dick moves in and out of her slowly, and deeply with the new angle. He hooks one of her legs over his shoulders so he can move as deep into her as he can.

Her fingers find a home in Ethan’s locks and pulls him down into a kiss. His movements remain slow and deep as he fucks her.

This doesn’t feel like fucking though. To her, it feels like more than that.

Ethan presses soft kisses to her wrists as he moves. She stares up at him and notices the soft look on his face. He looks almost relaxed.

“I love you,” Ethan softly pants. “So much, baby. I’m so lucky.”

“I’m so- ah- lucky,” she replies. “I’m so in love with you, E. Fuck.”

His speed picks up slightly and his thrusts get sloppy. He is close and she knows it.

She pushes the hair out of his face and pulls him down for a kiss. They both pant and groan as they get closer to their orgasms.

Her legs begin to shake and she feels the familiar knot in the pit of her stomach. Ethan’s fingers finding their way back to her clit almost undoes the knot. She cries out against Ethan’s lips.

“Come on my cock, baby,” Ethan mumbles against her lips. “Right behind you.”

“Come inside of me, Eddie,” she pants. “It’s okay. You know I’m on the pill.”

Ethan’s thrusts have slowed but he slams into her. She cries out a second later and clenches around Ethan’s dick. Her head is thrown back against the pillows and she cries his name. Her fingers dig into the skin on his back.

He shoots into her after a couple more thrusts. “Fuck,” he groans.

Her entire body melts into the mattress beneath her. Her breathing is labored as Ethan collapses on top of her. He lifts her head up and they share lazy kisses until he pulls out of her to clean her up.

She can’t move. Her body feels like jelly but the warm cloth feels good on her core and thighs. She whimpers as the cloth brushes over her sensitive core.

Ethan crawls back onto the bed and pulls the blankets on top of them. She manages to move so she can curl up against his side. She traces lazy shapes into his chest.

Silence fills the room, and it’s okay because she loves just being with Ethan.

Then a question rises in her head and she can’t resist asking. Especially when she knows that some of his teammates are leaving.

“Are you going to sign with the Devils?” she asks as she lifts her head. “It’s okay if you are. You know I’ll come to all the games that are closer to Mich-”

“I’m coming back for my senior year, baby,” he interrupts. “The Devils can wait. Shea is waiting too so it’s okay. We’re going to go together. You can’t get rid of me yet.”

She smiles and presses a soft kiss to his lips before she settles in for the night and falls asleep minutes later.

༺═──────────────═༻

MASTERLIST

have a request ? check out the guidelines first !

wanna be added to the taglist ? fill out this form !

taglist: @dasiysthings @equallyshaw @dancerbailey3 @love4lando @prettyinsatiable @ivy-34

[autisticempathydaemon]

Hello! Are you hyperfixated on RedactedAudio?

Do you want (need) to know who to follow to cultivate your dashboard and feed your gremlin brain good, good boyfriend roleplay content?

Cool, I’ve got you, and I’ve got hyperlinks. Buckle up.

(Note: This is by no means a comprehensive, objective, or complete list. I've only been in the fandom for six months or so. I have biases and favorites and limited time. I hope to update this list periodically, and if you feel I've missed someone, please feel free to reblog with your additions! I just would have loved a guide like this when I got into the fandom back in August and wanted to spread some positivity~!)

Fanfiction:

@angelnoodlesoup: she/her

Sophie is just one of the sweetest David stans that's ever existed who writes, like, the sweetest things about him. Her posts are just going to make you feel warm, fluffy, soft things in your heart area; give into the sweetness. Highlights: Sophie writes this adorable timestamp series of vignettes exploring Davey and Angel's day, but I'm particularly attacked to their David/Angel neighbors to lovers AU~

@arrowfleur

I was actually going to put Max in the visual content portion of this post, because they post delightful Redacted edits on Tiktok (under the same username, highly recommend~), but then they made a uquiz that gave me an existential crisis, so here we are. Highlights: This quiz sent my whole server for a loop and has made me reconsider my relationship with Lovely as a character and kin; it's a great time.

@batch-of-pengwings: robin/bird, she/her

Robin, an absolute sweetheart who makes all the fun ask games that keep the community interconnected and thinking and talking which is just really sweet and fun in the best way. Highlights: The Winter Wonderland game is the one who went around most recently, and it’s so fun to engage with the fandom and discuss who we think is stupid enough to get their tongues stuck on a telephone poll~

@bicyclepainting: they/them

Clover, the fandom's resident Smartass, doing the lord's work and reminding us all how fucking smoochable Aaron is on a regular basis on top of being the coolest astrology nerd don't give them your birth chart you will be perceived /lh Highlights: No one is doing Aaron/Smartass like they are; like, read and absorb the delicious, domestic delight that is them. I also recommend their deep dives into the Redacted bois signs, if you're into that; they're very thorough and fun to read!

@cashandprizes: she/they

My Lexi, my queerplatonic soulmate… She is on a quest to dissect and critique fandom brick by philosophical brick, and I both love her and fear her in equal measure. (That’s a lie, I love her infinitely, more than anything, but she is in fact incredibly intelligent and intimidating.) Highlights: Come for the scathing insights into gray-morality and DD:DNE’s place in fiction, stay for the stripper!Gavin fic they’re working on and their sequel to Lasko’s SexTember audio because she really wanted to make him cry

@ejunkiet: she/her

EJ, the very first of my Redacted loves~ Not only is EJ an endless well of kindness and positivity, but she also writes fucking bomb ass everything. You get angst, you get smut, you get fluff- We stan a multitalented, ace queen. (She also writes really cute CastleAudios fanfiction and original stuff as a cherry on top.) Highlights: EJ writes just some of my favorite David/Angel smut; she captures Angel's little shit nature perfectly. She's also written the sweetest thing of Damien meeting Huxley's moms that I can't get enough of~

@dominimoonbeam: she/her

Domini, truly one of the pillars of the fandom. I don't know what'd we'd be without her fantastic fics or her original novellas or her fantastic, beautiful, rarepair-creating brain. Highlights: God, there's too many to choose from! There's the Sam/Darlin fake dating AU that has us all gripped by the proverbial balls. There's the David/Darlin tattoo shop AU that has me frothing at the mouth because tattoo artists are stinkin hot. That's not even getting into their Cam/William fic, because god, that is such a good rarepair. We love two immortals finding love with one another, we really do. My personal favorite has got to be their Huxley/Darlin piece though, because Darlin gets to be cute and awkward and so, so loved in it.

@frenchiefitzhere: she/her

Frenchie, the fandom's unofficial (but basically official) Marie Greer, not only a gorgeous writer but also the creator of the most fantastical and unique fansongs (who makes original audio content to boot~) Highlights: We would be nowhere as a fandom without the Marie/Colm greer backstory and saga or her audios as the Greer Matriarch herself, but personally? Her Imperium!Lasko/Adam fic kind of changed my life, I'm kind of obsessed with it.

@friendlyfaded: he/him

Miles, the king and professor of the rarepairs! Beware, you will leave his blog wishing for fics for a ship that doesn’t actually exist yet. It’s unavoidable when you read the careful, creative, thoughtful way he considers seemingly silly pairings and makes them gorgeous. Highlights: I recommend his whole rarepairs with prof tag for a snack and his Sweetheart/Lasko/Milo fic for a whole meal~

@gingerbreadmonsters: she/her

Ginger, literally one of the sweetest, friendliest people in the entire Internet. I cannot adequately describe the absolute magnificent poetry of Ginger's prose, so you just have to read it for yourself. You will not be disappointed. Highlights: Ginger's Milo/Sweetheart series is for if you're feeling sweet, and her Vincent/Lovely/Gavin/Freelancer foursome fic is if you're feeling spicy~ Or if you're like me and are longing for an character we'll never see again, you can read her gorgeous, Doctor Who-inspired look in Marcus's mind.

@glassbearclock: she/her

Beans, also known as the best Milo/Sweetheart writer in the game. Their banter is taken from the mouth of god and first name Erik last name Redacted himself, and you could not convince me otherwise. Highlights: I’m a big fan of her sweet, wholesome, Jewish!Milo sick fic, but aYO her Milo/Sweetheart first date fic is so good y’all like goddamn Sweetheart phases through their door and makes Milo faceplant it on accident man that shit is so good

@horrorscoupes: they/he

My beautiful, darling Lotus, my gloriously deranged brother in arms (affectionate). The way they write each and every d(a)emons is just so -chef kiss-. Highlights: I think about their Regulus/Doll fic, like, literally every day, it's just yummy and depraved. Though, for a true taste of genius, for a galaxy brain treat, you've got to read his Shark!Vega/Pet masterpiece.

@k9rage: he/xi

My beloved Calico, our helpful Image Description fairy. He is just so cool and writes the most glorious smut like the world has ever seen. As of publishing, he's writing a Vega/Lasko street racing AU that's gonna be just smoke ash cinder fire hot. Highlights: You need to read his Damien/Gavin waxplay fic; like, this changed my life, I think about it daily. Ooh, AND his Aaron/SmartAss/Gavin threesome fic, because he didn't do all that thinking and imagining for us to not appreciate it. I'm also reccing @calicostorms, his other blog and spotify, so you can get at his stellar Redacted character playlists!

@lovelylonerliterature: 

Lovely, absolute stand-out writer in the fandom! Would you believe they have a whole (as of posting) 95 works for the RedactedASMR fandom on AO3? There’s <2000 fics, which makes Lovely a whole five percent of the fanfiction on their own. That’s wild and so hella cool. Highlights: Literally everything they write. Explore their extremely well done masterlist, it’s beautifully put together, and you’ll find something you love. (I’m particularly fond of the Darlin/Vega fic they wrote based off of one of FriendlyFaded’s posts~)

@romirola: she/her

Dr. Romi, the one and the only and one of the legitimate sweetest goddamn people that has ever existed. You've never met a more polite, darling person in all your days. How did she write all these thousands of words of art while getting a doctorate? God, I wish I knew... if only we could also be so beautiful and wonderful and accomplished. Highlights: You haven't existed until you've read her Milo/Sweetheart Tangled AU; like, what are you doing here? GO. (I also deeply recommend her found family Shaw Pack + Sam fic, if you're looking for something that's still ongoing!)

@sealriously-sealrious: they/them

Chrys who writes- no contest I think we can all agree- the best Huxley that this fandom has ever seen. He is just so well-explored and so multifaceted, just the top-tier himbo content we all need and deserve. Highlights: Huxley and Freelancer at the aquarium, Huxley and Freelancer going camping, sfw, nsfw, whatever you want, we've GOT. (There's even some imperium!Huxley, if you're so inclined >:))

@starlitangels: she/her

Starlit, another absolute powerhouse of the fandom. Just look at this masterlist, I think there’s something here for literally every character. That’s what babes call RANGE. Highlights: The way they explore the Shaw pack is so fun; I’d highly recommend her fic exploring Gabe and his backstory or her fic exploring the Shaw’s future pups~!

@taelonsamada: she/her

A pillar- or should I say fence post?- of the fandom and just an utter peach. Always has a nice word to say and says the best nice words about Sam and Darlin- Highlights: Her nsfw Geordi/Cutie fic holds a special place in my heart (the blindfold? the gag? Be still my beating heart), but you haven’t lived until you’ve read her Shaw-centric Ranch AU~!

@teasandcardigans: she/her

Mads, another lovely creator that could be in either section of this post- that's how talented she is! Not only is she a lovely writer but she also designs the most fun Redacted stickers! Also, she's got the only Redacted fan tiktok that Erik has confirmed seen and liked, can't not mention that it's so cool Highlights: Honestly, there's too many to mention! A really popular of hers is a "What If" echo-esque reimagining of everyone's stories which is so fun, and my personal, biased favorite is her Alexis & Gavin fic hear me OUT-

@the-sugar-crash

Cait, out here doing the most and the best. They’ve run the Redacted Winter Gift Exchange for the past two years, connecting blogs who might have never spoken to each other, inspiring creativity, and spreading holiday cheer~ Highlights: I recommend taking a look-see through the “Redacted 2022 Winter Gift Exchange” tag- much thanks to Cait for making it possible- to consider if you’d like to join next year! Until then, there’s a compilation of their cute headcanon posts to inspire you!

@zozo-01: she/her

Zo, one of the sweetest people in the fandom~ Not only is she a fantastic writer, but she is also one of the friendliest people in the space! Constantly excited and supportive and positive and a joy to follow and befriend. Highlights: Her Sam/Darlin Deity AU is going to change the world and break some hearts, I just know it. (Just like her Alexis and Darlin meeting fic broke mine-) If you're not up to getting your heart broken and just want a friend, I recommend asking her about her Powerpoint of Bollywood scenes that could be Sam/Darlin moments~!

Fanart:

@andr0leda: she/they

Androleda’s art is so gorgeous in that most of them are uncolored or working with a smaller palette, and it just makes those colors stand out and the line work all the more elegant. Highlights: Their wolf!Darlin piece got so popular, and you can see why! It looks like the cover of a really cool YA fantasy novel. Also, her Sam/Darlin art just melts the heart- the gentle hand, the key around the neck-!

@artbykays

Kays, a fantastic artist who plays around with the prettiest, brightest colors and has the prettiest (hottest) fem listeners. They also have super fun Redacted playlists! Highlights: Their Sweetheart, Valentina, is kind of smokin hot, I mean look at her, but also good lord, have you seen their Warden like lock me up anytime hello-

@belovedbow

Bow’s art just makes me so soft and gooey inside I dunno. Their art is so pretty, and they always have the most expressive faces. Not to mention the colors- like, Bow uses the simplest but most emotionally evocative shades of pinks and blues that make me inexplicably feel things, and I love it. Highlights: Literally all their Davey/Angel is the sweetest, but I also have this deep fondness for their imp!FL and Vindemiator pieces, because look at these deep, mournful blues, they’re beautiful!

@cascadiiing: they/them

Atlas creates the most beautiful, squishable, smoochable characters on top of being the most beautiful, squishable, smoochable (platonic) sweetie in existence~ they’re so sweet and friendly on top of being so talented at such a young age, and I would protect them with my life. Highlights: Their Sam kind of makes me so lovesick, I could barf- he’s just that pretty. Their Alexis/Christian art is fanart of my own fic, I’ll grant you, but it’s also so fucking pretty look at the dreamy colors and it MOVES-

@claracatlady

Where would we be without Clara, like honestly- What really stands out about their art is- other than the overwhelming talent- the obvious thought and joy that went into designing the outfits. Only the best from our resident fashion design student! Highlights: literally everything. If I must be specific, the David design pinned to their blog is utterly ahdhkakshdjsk, and I am particularly partial to their Alexis design, because I love my beautiful, possibly complex lady okay-

@fregget-frou : he/they

Mal has the prettiest Listeners; I’m lowkey in love with all of them~ I love the way he does such fluffy, voluminous hair, and I dunno, all their listener OC’s have this fashion model-esque glamour and posture about them that’s really attractive. Highlights: Of their listeners, Mal’s Angel has got to be my favorite. Look at this fluffy-haired cutie! Look at this menace! I would also propose to them, they’re gorgeous!

@gwenifred: she/her

Gwen draws the most gorgeous, swoon-worthy Huxleys and is just a big sweetpea to boot. Her and Pali sharing OC’s and art trades here and on Twitter is a testament to how friendly and sweet the fandom can be! Highlights: Everything she draws is gorgeous, but you haven’t lived until you’ve seen her animation work!

@ice-palace-art: They/It/He/Dae

Darby has some of the most beautiful designs, I can hardly stand it. He creates the most gorgeous, realistically proportioned characters and listeners, and they’re just really smoochable okay let me live- Highlights: It has this one piece of Gavin and Lasko having a sleepover that fills me with the warm fuzzies every time I see it, and their Aaron design fills me with longing I am hopelessly in love with their dad-bodded Aaron.

@itsdaifuku: she/her

Y’all don’t even know the little happy stim storm Fuku’s art sets me on; like, all her art is so cute and joyful and somehow colorful even when it’s in black and white? It just gives the vibe of life and vibrancy constantly? How does she do that? Highlights: Literally, everything she draws is gorgeous and sweet, though her designs for the Shaws and their mates are so S-tier and so cute. (I’m also particularly fond of her designs for Love and Alexis, my favorite characters, I’m biased, sue me)

@mr-laveau: he/they

Laveau, my favorite Milo kinnie~ (Yeah, I said it out loud; I’m callin you out.) Charming, thoughtful, friendly, much more talented than they have any right to be when they’re also so funny and sweet, AND also writing at their other blog @bratty-telepath. You’ve never seen such a double threat. Highlights: Literally, everything he makes. All his designs are colorful and gorgeous and filled to the brim with deliberate, intentional details (though I am incredibly partial to their Alexis and Darlin designs and the parallels he included between them.)

@nais-doodles

Nai is a fucking blessing unto this fandom, and we are not worthy. You haven’t really lived, haven’t experienced all the pure, positive silliness that this hellsite has to offer until you experience Nai’s Redacted Actor AU. It’s pure serotonin, and we’re all here listening to Boyfriend ASMR, I know we could use it. Highlights: Other than said AU posts (which really are so fuckin good), have you seen their drawing of Vincent and Sam’s Monarchal ball? Ooh, and if you go to their tiktok under the same username, you can see some of the really cool dating sim they’re working on!

@nanowatzophina: any pronouns

Na’no is not only a must follow on tumblr, but I also highly recommend their tiktok if you wish to wade through the horrid cesspool of that app (I say with tiktok as one of my top social media sites- we have a codependent relationship) Their art is super cute and expressive, and I get massive gender envy from the way he draws hair and teeth. Highlights: Her aspec Freelancer is just so close to my heart; I adore Avery so deeply. Also, the way they draw imperium!Vega and Pet makes my heart fucking melt and want to jump out my chest- the size difference, my god

@obsessivedino: they/them

Mint’s contribution to the fandom cannot possibly be overstated. Their art style is just so clean and neat and with the cutest expressions, and I love their designs so much, especially for the d(a)emon bois I just ahhhhh Highlights: If you’ve joined the official unofficial Redacted Discord server, you’ve seen their adorable stickers reminding you to kick that ass or hydrate unless you want to die-drate, and you haven’t truly embraced life unless you’ve seen their two-year anniversary masterpiece. Ooh, or pocket caelum!

@palilious: she/her

There is no Redacted fandom or fandom list without Pali, and we’ve all accepted that. Her style is so uniquely and instantaneously recognizable as hers, and everyone adores it, including but not limited to GBA, Nomad, and Cardlin! Highlights: Literally everyone she draws is so pretty, though I have a soft spot for her Vincent or her Nomad drawings if you’re looking for more VAs to listen to!

@pearl-kite: she/they

Kirehn has the most huggable humans and the most awe-inspiring d(a)emons. The way she draws the d(a)emons with constellations worked into the designs and color palettes is just so gorgeous and purposeful and thoughtful. Highlights: Their Vega is so frightening but beautiful, you just can’t look away from him. I’m also particularly in love with their Darlin!

@queendread

Do y’all ever do this thing when you see an ethereally beautiful person and you have no words, all you can do is giggle like a vapid schoolgirl(gn)? That’s me with all of Anna’s paintings: no words, just awe. Highlights: I don’t even really like Gavin, okay, he’s not my type, but lord above, Anna’s Gavin is something else. Their Sam also has those Captain America, boy next door good looks I imagined, it’s like they took him right out of my daydreams.

@ryokoaoi : they/them

Ryo has the absolute cutest, most adorable art style, one can barely handle it! Everything they draw is just so pretty and so colorful and detailed and sweet. (Except the sad things, those are less sweet but gosh they’re still so pretty.) They also have this Magic Swap AU that they design that is so fun to read about! Highlights: Their swapped! Gavin and Avior designs are so fun, I adore them deeply, and if you need something to cheer you up, you can always depend on their DAMN pieces that always include a little invisible Caelum to bring you joy~!

@slushrottweiler: she-they

There is nothing like seeing Slush’s signature blue linework on your dashboard, it’s such a sweet treat- or spicy. There are also very good, very spicy treats. Her blog is a magnificent roulette wheel of blue surprises. Highlights: I love their Sam/Darlin stuff, especially this one because wowee them shoulderblades, but their HuxDami BA piece takes the cake.

@spookybeandoodle

Spooky has my whole heart and wallet and my other heart if I had one I fell in love with their rich color palettes and shading and Alexis right away and had to commission them. Could not recommend enough, they were a treasure to work with~ Highlights: I’m not biased- okay yes I am but not now their Alexis is fuckin smoking hot but also their Cam might be my favorite Cam look at that smile-!

@sri-rachaa: she/her

Rae is such a treasure to this fandom, we hardly deserve her. Her art is so ethereally pretty and delicate? The way she draws hair and noses and silhouettes- her line work is just phenomenal. Everything she creates is just a delight to look at. Highlights: The Southern Siblings AU is a gift, a treasure, a boon that cannot be ignored. I’m also a big fan of her Lovely OC who is ridiculously pretty~

@tankwolf : she/her

June has been posting fanart for only two months, but I’m already absolutely obsessed. I just find her monochrome character portraits so visually engaging and interesting. I would love so badly to be friends with her listener OC’s… Highlights: …or more than friends, because her Sweetheart is something else good lord. I would just love it if June could stop putting the hot people in crop tops please (but also don’t cause whoa)

@terrazaurio

All the fanart Terra creates is so bright and vivid and colorful and expressive, they’re really such a treat to see and experience. I’m a sucker for the colors they use, cause it makes my lizard brain all happy and go “shiny pretty happy.” Highlights: Everything they draw with the Shaw Pack is pure dopamine, like this one of the bois and their mates hanging by the pool. I am particularly attached to this piece from Milo’s HBS, because they’re so fucking in love, your honor, I love them.

@thefablefoxart : she/her

Angelina’s Redacted couple series is one of the truest delights of the fandom; like, they’re so colorful and cute and just adorably designed. I’m also deeply in love with the way she does hair. Everyone just has really fucking good looking hair, and I can’t get over it-Highlights: On top of the aforementioned couple series, I just want to bring attention to this adorable chibi Sam that she drew- it brings me so much serotonin- and their Darlin, Kai who I wish would just give me a shot okay I have a Southern accent too-

If you’re reading all the way here, I hope you found the post helpful and smiled while making your way through it! Or both! The RedactedAudio fandom is truly one of my favorite spaces on the internet; it’s so intimate and creative, and I’ve found some amazing, perfect friends here, so I hope you will too 💖

again playing around with the formatting please stop hurting me tumblr I’m trying to be nice

If you can see this, I love you, and you’re watching me try to format this post so tumblr doesn’t cut off the bottom of it please ignore the Android behind the emerald curtain go about your day

[sevnation]

my redacted top ten! (listener edition)

1. angel, all i post about on this account is angel. theyre just like me fr and i have so many plots and headcanons for them (theyre a stoner, theyre from a hunter family, blah blah blah) but i also love the way they interact with david, perfect match imo.

2. sweetheart, whats not to love about sweetheart. sassy, break in master, most powerful stealth in the redactive universe to date, and they’re dating milo!

3. fool!freelancer specifically. fool!freelancer is so attractive i was literally acting like gavin the whole video. if fool!freelander walked up to me in a cafe we’d be in the bathroom in 20 minutes

4. doc. i love doc. theyre so morgan coded its insane and they treat hush with such gentleness (hush, the serial murderer)

5. lovely. NOW DONT GER ME WRONG. i love lovely so much, theyre my baby and they deserve better. however, i cant listen to the vincent audios without crying. my baby gained powers after almost being killed, losing said powers and ACTUALLY DYING, and is now living life as a dead person. me and vincent wouldve been scrapped

6. darlin. same as lovely, cant listen to sam’s playlist beyond the ‘alpha and mate have a talk’ because it makes me break down into tears.

7. starlight. avior and starlight COME HOME ITS BEEN 2 MONTHS AND 1 WEEK. but anyway, theyre not low because i dont like them, theyre low because i like everyone else more. starlight my sassy king

8. baabe. NOW LISTEN PLEASE LISTEN DONT GRAB ME PLEASE. i love baabe sm theyre so sweet but ASHER HAS LITTLE TO NO AUDIOS. I DONT KNOW PLS. i love baabe and ash tho my bbs

9. bestie. STAND UP. STAND UP NOWWW. this made is a CULTIST AND YOU KISSED HIM. YOU GOT CULT COOTIES.

10. asset / cutie. no explanation.

[readyandnot]

hot boi summer ‘23 ready rambles :)

buckle in everyone~

ALRIGHT I HAVE A LOT SO WE’LL START FROM THE BEGINNING:

david: a very nice and simple introduction to hot boi summer 23! he makes working out sound hot- ANYWAY angel being a menace as always and david being so soft with them like :,) and angel going to find him i’m crying

the spiciness was good! i just imagine the guy on camera was like “yeah i’m gonna leave them be” lmao

overall a great audio and a nice intro to the lineup :)

vincent: a very good vincent audio in general and i loveee the story for this one! the fact that these two are so comfortable with just doing their own thing and just going to a 7/11 dressed up is amazing. i love their relationship so much. VINCENTS SLURPEEEE I LOVE HIM. the spiciness was so good. I JUST WISH WE GOT A GLIMPSE OF WHAT VINCENT WAS SAYING UGHHHH

overall i love this audio and it’s very cute with a hint of spice :)

avior: AVIORRRRR

this was the one i looked forward to the most (and anton) BECAUSE SPICY WITH AVIOR YES PLEASE. this one is definitely my favorite on so many levels. THE FACT HE MADE STARLIGHT AN OASIS WITH THE OTHER LEVELS AND THE GOLD??? this dude is such a romantic he’s giving gavin and vincent a run for their money. AND THE ENDING??? so good. (lowkey think avior’s a switch) the spiciness was so good, it was simple but that’s what i think the best part about it is, and it was very romantic with the skinny dipping like omg.

i’m so sad this one didn’t win, but the livestream gave me hope that it might be continued like p l e a s e .

overall, the best one imo and i hope it gets continued eventually :)

gavin: a very good hot boi summer addition especially for gavin! seeing the other bois pop in as well in the beginning was amazing :) AND THE REFERENCE TO THE APRON MADE ME FREAK OUT

freelancer and gavin are such menaces and i love them for it, so horny for each other and it’s great. (flashbacks to huxley’s grilling audio anyone?) and the thought of gavin being submissive o m g. i love that idea so much because we have literally never seen that side of him so i am curious about that (maybe in the future?) the spiciness was amazing and i’m very sure they had a great time back at fl’s place lol

overall a solid great audio and definitely in my top five for this lineup :)

lasko: lasko lasko lasko. this one was great!!! i love seeing their relationship continue to grow and seeing how much lasko has changed since we first saw him! especially in the aspect that he’s used to taking things further but the fact that this is different to him :,) do you hear me crying. i love how easy the listener seems to be with lasko and how much of a calming presence they are for him, i know this relationship is going to be a great one! i hope soon we get an audio of the listener meeting the damn gang and fl! (and hopefully a nickname i’m begging) the spiciness is simple and i’m glad we’re seeing this change of pace!

overall, a nice change of things and i like this audio a lot!

elliott: I LOVE THIS ONE A LOT (this is probably my second favorite) it’s so good!! and it’s nice/bittersweet to see elliott and sunshine happy (like please can they be together again i’m crying) THE DRAGON. don’t even get me started-

the role play i cant- now i know these two definitely play dnd. elliott breaking out of character was hilarious and sunshine actually having some powers was a great idea!! the ending- (i’m crying). this relationship is so good they need to be with each other and i miss them being happy :( the spiciness is great in this one and so so so romantic ughhh

overall, i love this audio and it’s a solid addition to the lineup (i also love the irony of the coolness)

asher: one of the more tame ones and that’s not a bad thing! it’s definitely one of the sweetest audios in the whole channel because omg. asher is so emotionally intelligent and i’m so proud of him for how much he’s grown since the inversion!!! he knows who he is and how life can change so he’s using it to his advantage and i love that for him and babe :) their dynamic is great as always and the spiciness was good! (hopefully they were fine in the car lmao)

the horn part was hilarious and so on point lol

overall, a nice audio! very sweet with a little spice :)

guy: very tame for a guy audio which surprised me! i feel like this one was more focused on guy struggling to make it up to honey which i love because guy is such a menace lol

honey is such a saint but i love seeing how soft they can be with guy while still being a little grumpy (it is cute in guys defense) and i love their relationship and how it’s come to be so far!

the ending was great which added to the spiciness and it was hilarious at the same time, only guy can do that lmao

overall, a very simple but good audio! :)

anton: this one. (do you hear me sobbing.) the story and the dynamic was just in point and the references to the work AND THE PLANT I AM C R Y I N G. as soon as he said gift i knew it would be the plant :,(

seeing how devoted the listener and anton are to each other is beautiful. and how sweet they are with each other even if they seem like complete opposites. AND ANTONS WORDS WERE BEAUTIFUL (even if he said he’s not a man of many words i don’t care) the spiciness was so good too and very natural! it was soooo nice to see that side of anton and i wouldn’t mind if this one was continued :)

overall a lovely audio and probably my third favorite of the lineup :)

damien and huxley: THIS ONE WAS AMAZING. the ba was phenomenal and i’m honestly not mad that they got it, they deserved it and lived up to my expectations!!! the beginning was awesome and i loveee their convos so much more than i should. (the fact that gavin and fl burned the food doesn’t surprise me lol) AND THE SWITCH WITH THEM I CANTTT

the spiciness was great, it felt so natural and they are so great together.

overall (because i’m not gonna spoil the ba) i love this audio. i love them. and it would be unfair for me to put them in the ranking because it’s so good.

sam: this was a great audio!! i love the idea of sam being in the club and just being so awkward lol so i’m glad it’s now canon. THE WHOLE GROUP AS WELL LIKE YES THANK YOU REDACTED. (and the fact that david’s on the dance floor i’m deceased)

their dynamic is so good as always. and the visuals you get from this are great! seeing how they are finally letting loose after dealing with quinn is a great thing and i’m so happy for them. (also the vibes with this one were so good i was dancing the entire time.) the spiciness was so good, just imagining darlin “dancing” with sam like sheeesh

overall a great addition to to the lineup and to sam in general :)

milo: LAST BUT NOT LEAST. this one was so sweet and so relatable. (like i relate to sweetheart so much it’s not even funny.) the fact that they are so comfortable with each other and how sweetheart is stressed over vacation being over is a mood and i love how milo comforts them over it. HE KNOWS EXACTLY THE RIGHT THING TO SAY/DO AND I LOVE HIM. the spiciness was great and i love seeing them together like that because they are always so needy for each other it’s crazy. (and not a bad thing either-)

overall a great audio and i love milo so much. :)

(i am not including nick you better believe that)

now for my ranking: (not counting huxley/damien)

avior

elliott

anton

sam

gavin

milo

vincent

asher

lasko

david

NOW- i’m gonna be a little controversial but i don’t think sam deserved the ba. for a couple reasons: one, he already had one last month. and it was a good one too! i understand that his hbs was good but there are other boys who deserved it. which goes into my second reason, other boys who either haven’t gotten one (anton/avior) or who haven’t had one for a long time (elliott/gavin) i feel deserved to get the ba. putting favoritism aside it makes sense! lastly, (after listening to sams ba) i feel sam’s ba was underwhelming to be honest. there were moments that were amazing but the rest just felt like a normal ba. i was hoping there would be more to it but unfortunately not (for me at least). AND i understand that avior won the poll for an update (i don’t think it should have won btw) but i don’t think that should matter if it was something in the past if that makes sense.

overall, this years was great and i’m very happy in general! new people and the theme was awesome as well with the rewind! (here’s hoping one more is continued at least)

i cant wait for next year’s :)

what’s next: hush happened…. that shit was crazy.

i think avior is next? i’m so excited to get an update eeeee

if you made it this far, thanks for reading this rant and i hope you have a great morning/day/night

HAPPY HOT BOI SUMMER YALL

[alrxiin]

"And I thank you, for bringing me here.

For showing me home — For singing these tears.

Finally I've found...That I belong here." ~ Home — Depeche Mode

@themeridian

Gavin x Freelancer (GN reader) || angst/comfort/fluff

Summary : Takes place before/during Gavin's love confession, so it contains mentions of NSFW, I'm ofc also not copying the confession, it'll be different

•┈┈┈•┈┈┈•┈┈┈

"Showing me that I belong — with you."

•┈┈┈•┈┈┈•┈┈┈

Gavin...Gavin, Gavin, Gavin – he was all that was on their mind right now, all senses overwhelmed by him, touch especially. The blindfold on their eyes made every other sense work harder, and the restraints on their wrists and ankles, made their body twitch and squirm under the Incubus' gentle touch.

Oh, how they loved him, if they had to... they'd say he might as well take their heart, because he was all that was in it now.

The sensations were getting almost unbearable, but in such a good way, and just then;

- "I...I think I need a minute." — Gavin's soft voice broke though the silence, and the restraints on their body had disappeared in a second.

Worry in their mind, they sat up almost instantly, taking a seat next to the anxiety filled Demon, that had always been so gentle with them.

- "Gavin? Are...Are you alright?" — Those words cut right through him, and he couldn't help but hide his face into his hands.

But instead of pressuring for more, they waited, looking at the man next to them with a million thoughts in their head. Little did they know, he was experiencing the same... so many thoughts, yet so little he could do.

- "No I... I don't think I'm okay, Freelancer." — His voice broke, and it sounded like he was about to cry within the next few seconds, yet he didn't.

- "I need to talk to you... but not as a dom or– or Incubus. As Gavin." — His tone suddenly got serious, and he tried to look at them, but the second he did, his feelings betrayed him.

Knowing just how stressful this is for him, even if not knowing what was on his mind, they took his hand... and God, did that make his heart flutter.

- "Please...talk to me." — Is all they spoke. But it was all he needed to start.

- "You..know sex is what I do, it's what I enjoy... it's what I love. The knowledge I'm giving people pleasure, and safety." — He paused, looking for the right words and the courage to say them.

- "Safety, that I always feel with you." —

There were tears in his eyes, and this was the first time he let himself be so... vulnerable around someone, and especially around Freelancer.

- "It took a while to even admit this to myself, for so long I couldn't accept that I could feel like this..." — Taking a deep breath, he lowered his head to hide his almost hurt expression.

- "I love you. I've always loved you. And I tried, I really tried to show it in ways I knew how, but it wasn't working. And I just feel like..like I used you, even if I didn't mean to and..." — The soft whimper that escaped his lips shot right through their heart. Sitting in silence, they took in the confession.

- "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry..." —

But before he could even finish the useless apology, they gently squeezed his hand and cupped his cheek, turning his head up to face them.

- "Oh, Gavin..." — Their voice barely above a whisper as they leaned into him, and pressed a loving kiss to his lips. It was like no other they had before, it was gentle and soft.

And when they pulled away, the confused look on the Incubus' face was priceless, making them giggle ever so slightly.

- "I love you too... I have since the beginning." —

He smiled, letting out a breath he didn't know he was even holding, and threw himself into their arms with a laugh.

- "Holy shit... I..I didn't think you could ever feel the same." —

- "And why wouldn't I? You really don't realize that you're the sweetest being on this planet, don't you?" — They laughed softly, holding the Demon close as they layed back down, bringing him down with them, onto their chest.

Both of them layed there for a second, embracing each other in a comfortable silence, no more words needed...

- "Hey... how about we celebrate this?" —

Well... maybe a little more than words.

[zozo-01]

5 + 1: Headcanons Editions 💞

I was tagged by the lovely and talented @romirola to share some headcanons and I could never turn down an opportunity like this! Gonna be honest, I have so many headcanons that I can probably make a hundred of these, but!!! I shall narrow down to my 5 (+1) favourites!!!

Tagging (with no pressure <3): @starlitangels, @taelonsamada, @slushrottweiler, @thatlesbeanjew, @halscafe, @autisticempathydaemon and you!!! Tag me in your shit!!!

Without a further ado, here we go!!!

Darlin' has been dealing with ongoing burnout since their senior year of high school. It's followed them through their undergrad to Quinn to them trying to take care of everyone post-Inversion. Being with Sam is the first time in a long time they afforded themselves a break.

David was a fussy baby, especially when putting him to sleep, so Gabe used to drive him for hours just to put him asleep. Sometimes, David would be a lil shit and cry on purpose just so Gabe can drive him around.

William has a book club with Gavin, Avior and Cam! They vary their book choices from books written by authors from the renaissance to freaking Twilight. Once William learned that Darlin' is also an avid reader, he extends the invitation to them! (One they hesitantly accept.)

Vincent has made a sizeable donation to D.A.M.N. just so he can name a building after Lovely as an act of love. They pretend to not acknowledge their name on the building but adore the gesture all the same.

Due to his knowledge of anatomy, Sam is an avid drawer. Sometimes, he'll just sit around and sketch the people around him as practice. He's tried to go digital with his artwork, but very much prefers doodling by hand.

Plus the one...

Perhaps Alexis and Darlin' crossed paths long before any of us thought they did... [wink wink]

[6-atlas-6]

Here's a list of anime characters that I associate redacted characters with because I'm a fucking nerd

(It's only jjk, csm, and bsd because they're my favorites atm so I'm thinking abt them more)

Lasko: Yuta Okkotsu.

I've already said this before but I'll say it forever. They're both nervous wrecks until they know shits getting serious, they're both afraid of hurting other people with their powers, I mean come on.

Vega: Suguru Geto or Makima.

Vega and Geto both have to absorb/feed on pure negative energy. Vegas a sadism demon so that's obvious, and Geto has to absorb curses born from negative emotion. Vega and Makima are both overpowered as fuck, manipulative as shit, and clearly hiding everything about themselves. I mean come on they both refer to their "partners" as pets. (I say partner lightly cause technically in Makimas case that shits grooming).

Damien: Maki Zenin

While we're on the Jujutsu Kaisen train. This one is weird because Maki is driven because she wants to prove her family wrong while Dames is driven because he wants to live up to his families expectations, but in my head they're similar in the family aspect.

Sweetheart: Denji.

The whole "if my friends died would I even cry?" thing is so them. I just think sweetheart is so used to death that it barely phases them anymore so they have that whole am I emotionally numb moment exactly like Denji did. Also Devil Hunter, Department worker, you get me.

Blake: Himeno.

They don't have similar personalities persay but some aspects are similar. Both are really shitty people but you're able to sympathize with them because they would do anything for the person they love, even if their efforts mean nothing in the end. Both of their partners are destined to inevitably die in the near future but they still do everything in their power to stop that from happening. Also even though the feelings they had weren't necessarily reciprocated (Blake's were but he didn't think they were). I would say Blake is definitely crazier than Himeno though like 100%.

Aaron: Choso.

Protective older brother who would do literally anything for his younger sibling(s). That's all.

Gavin: Sigma.

The whole "what was I made for/why am I here" thing. They both were created for a specific purpose that doesn't resonate with/apply to them anymore. Sure Gavin still feeds on attraction and Sigma is still involved with the DOA, but in a different way than they used to be. Both of them just want to live normal lives and do normal human shit. Please let them live.

Echo: Fukuchi.

They can both go die in a hole, they make everything worse for literally everyone else, and they have some bullshit ability that fucks up everyone's day. I don't hold any resentment towards either of them guys trust /s

[werewolfenthusiast]

My November Reads

(‼️IF YOU WANT ME TO REMOVE YOUR FIC FROM HERE FOR ANY REASON PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I REVIEW BOOKS BUT ONLY PRAISE FICS.‼️)

————————————————————————

Books:

All of Our Demise by Amanda Foody and C.L. Herman

The sequel and conclusion to the All of Us Villains duology. A generational family curse holds them to a contest where they must volunteer one of their children to fight to the death every 20 years in order for that family to wield high magick. The curse is on the edge of collapse and they will attempt to break it before it kills them. Drama, betrayal, alliances, romance, all the classics unfold. - This was fun, definitely not my usual kind of read, I did feel like a few things fell kinda flat, but it was fun. I liked Alistair, Hendry,and Gavin, but I found myself being kinda bored with the others though I am almost always like that when a book has switching POVs. Alistair has HEAVY blorbo potential he’s tragic and damp but also dramatic and hilarious and bisexual so points for that. 3.5/5 stars.

————————————————————————

Fics:

The Killing Time (unwillingly mine) by @kaaaaaaarf

Utterly unhinged Wolfstar. I love dark comedy and this was done so well, devoured it in one sitting and it made me actually laugh out loud multiple times.

the mayors of simpleton by @fruityindividual

Finished this because it’s OVER??? And I’m supposed to just move on??

————————————————————————

One Shots:

Well Past Midnight by @in-flvx

Remus being the most anxious, pathetically and hopelessly in love teenage boy while Sirius is a nerd. I love them so.

Heaven Has a Curb Perfect for Smoking On by @iheartmoons

Canon compliant, afterlife fic. I WILL cry and throw up actually.

————————————————————————

[4ragon]

So I just reblogged another aa fanfic masterlist, and that seemed like a cool idea. SO, since so many people are migrating to here from Twitter (and especially since this is the only place where my name doesn't match my AO3 account) I thought should put a list of my AA fics together! (I'd do the other fandoms but I don't think I'd have a substantial enough list)

So here's the JJ Ace Attorney fanfic masterlist:

Long Fics -

The Miraculous Disappearance Of Phoenix Wright (107,213 words)

Phoenix Wright wakes up in a world where he never existed. What will he do when he's trapped in a world where everything he's ever loved is gone? Minor narumitsu. My first AA fic, and the fic that got me back into writing for the first time since I was a shitty teenager.

(Also please read the tags, this one has some heavy subject matter and a LOT of spoilers)

Singderella (28,103 words)

Apollo decides to try his hand at a singing contest, held by a certain ex-rockstar, for a chance to win some runner-up money. He didn't want to win the dang contest. And he sure as hell didn't want to become Klavier Gavin's mysterious disappearing muse. This one is Klapollo and this one's Silly As Hell.

Vacation All I Ever Wanted (111,197 words)

Six lawyers and a magician spend a week at the beach. One condo. Six lawyers. Seven secret plans. What could possibly go wrong? Established narumitsu, getting-together klapollo, platonic Athena and Simon, and Trucy Wright in all her glory. (Also has some AA4 and 5 spoilers)

also @/ministarfruit drew me fanart and it made me cry

Shorter Klapollo fics -

Google Search: how to turn off a gaviners alarm clock

Google Search: off button on gaviners alarm clock Google Search: how to end my suffering Google Search: please god i just wanted to sleep in

No I did not write this as a thinly veiled excuse to complain about my roommate's alarm clock what are you talking about

Also fanart from @/lycheestew

Don't Get Too Comfortable

Apollo gets caught in a rainstorm, so Klavier invites him to wait it out at his condo. Written for the Klapollo Unfolding Melody zine. I'm really proud of this one!

Either Way

It's Klavier's first week back since the Misham Trial, and Klavier had yet to gather the courage to see Apollo Justice. At least, until Apollo Justice grabs him in a panic and shoves the two of them into a broom closet.

(Klapollo Week 2021 - Protection)

Atroquinine My Love (Accoustic)

When Apollo asks Klavier for guitar lessons, Klavier is more than happy to oblige. Written for the 2021 Klapollo minibang, featuring lovely art from the wonderful @/nhuquyen

Half-and-Half

Klavier and Apollo go on their first date. That's it. That's the fic.

(Klapollo Week 2021 - Firsts)

Of Petals and Punctuality

Klavier forgets about their anniversary. That's also it. (Everyone also says this fic makes them sad but I thought it was fucking funny when I wrote it)

(Klapollo Week 2021 - Flowers)

Just A Quiet Morning

Apollo Justice wakes up to make breakfast on his wedding anniversary.

(Klapollo Week 2023 - Domesticity)

Schatz

“Hey, Athena, what does ‘shots’ mean?” Pre-dating, Athena and Phoenix mess with Apollo.

(Klapollo Week 2023 - Nicknames)

Narumitsu fics -

Procrastination

Prompt: Pre-dating narumitsu pinning and yearning for each other and all their friends and family trying to find a way for them to be finally be together

This was for a secret santa.

The Gentleman Always Gets the Girl

Sorry, Mr. Edgeworth, but the gentleman always gets the girl.

(Narumitsu Week 2023 - Foreign)

But I Thought You Hated The Mall

Miles takes Trucy to the mall. This does not go as planned.

(Narumitsu Week 2023 - Family)

Gen Fics -

A Different Kind of Lullaby (Warning, major AAI2 Spoilers)

“Hi Mr. Edgeworth, do you think Pops killed my mom?”

@/ehlihr drew the coolest fucking comic btw holy shit

Baking and Entering

Kay and Sebastian break into Edgeworth's house to bake a cake. This one was for the Dadworth Lion Lillies zine and I'm also super proud of it.

Juniper Dumped Me

Wait, wait when were Juniper and I dating?!

In which Juniper dumps Apollo, who absolutely knows what's happening, don't worry about it. Minor Junithena, literally the stupidest thing I've ever written. Dedicated to my discord friends who helped me come up with the idea.

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Kay Faraday has a secret and Miles has to get to the bottom of it. Also has some AAI2 spoilers.

Another Trip Around The Sun

Apollo Justice's first birthday without Clay Terran. Minor klapollo. It's a story about grief and I did cry while writing it.

Just a Roll of Stamps

It's been a year since Phoenix officially adopted Trucy, and Phoenix is starting to worry that she hasn't made any friends.

(Wright Family Week 2021 - Friends)

Bet On It

Apollo and Athena vs. Trucy and Phoenix. Whoever beats the escape room first wins. Whoever loses buys noodles for a year. But…it can't be that simple, right?

(Wright Family Week 2021 - Scheming and Hijinks)

Dear Runo

Phoenix and Trucy decide to clean out their spare room, and discover an old cardboard box labeled Grandpa Ryuu. Inside, they discover some old books, some letters, and possibly an old secret?! (Or maybe not). This one was for another secret santa exchange.

First Class Accomodations

After the events of Investigations 2, Sebastian Debeste is invited to spend a few nights at the Courtney residence while he figures out what to do next.

This was written for the AA Writer Zine and I am very proud of it.

Tumblr Original Ficlets

Ficlets include narumitsu, klapollo, and a few junithena, and one (1) blackmadhi.

Anyway, I think that's everything. Y'all super don't have to read these, I just wanted all of them in one place. If you do read them, though, feel free to let me know if you liked them! Comments and stuff make my day.

[caplanbuckybarnes]

CAPPYS DECADE CHALLENGE

It’s absolutely been forever since I made a writing challenge and I’ve been wanting more fics to read, so alas, here’s a new one for y’all.

updated on April 4 2024 to allow for ANY character you'd like!

Rules:

It’s not necessary to follow me, but it’s always appreciated

There are no deadlines, but please keep me updated on your fics.

Tag the fic #cappysdecadeschallenge

Also tag me in the authors notes (along with the hashtag so I know which Masterlist to place the fic when I post it)

Please tag the proper warnings before the fic

CAN BE ANY CHARACTER YOU HAVE INSPIRATION FOR!!

More than one person can write for the prompts

No RPFs

If this happens to get more reblogs/ participants than I expect I’ll add more songs to each decade.

If you’d like to write for more than one song, please make them separate fics

Can be however long you’d like the fic to be. (If it’s more than 450 words PLEASE use the keep reading feature.

If I do not respond to your fic being posted in 24hours of you posting the fic, please message me a link.

Send me an ask or a DM with your prompt and the character you’re writing for.

50s

I’ve Got You Under My Skin— frank sinatra

Dream A Little Dream of Me —Ella Fitzgerald $ Louis Armstrong

Put Your Head on my Shoulder- Paul Anka

Stupid Cupid- Connie Francis

Pennies From Heaven —- Louis prima

I’m Gonna Get Married —Lloyd Price

Your Cheatin’ Heart — Hank Williams

I Walk The Line — Johnny Cash

We Belong Together — Ritchie Valens

Tears On My Pillow — Little Anthony

60s

My Girl — The Temptations

When a Man Loves a Woman —- Percy sledge

Stand By Me — Ben E. King

Build Me Up Buttercup —- the Foundations

I want you back —- the Jackson 5

I want to hold your hand —- the Beatles

You can’t hurry love -- the supremes

I can’t help myself — four tops

Then he kissed me— the crystals

Can’t help falling in love— Elvis Presley

70s

Dancing Queen— ABBA

I can see clearly now— Johnny Nash

December 1963 — the four seasons

I want you back — the Jackson five

Ain’t no sunshine — bill withers

Jolene — Dolly Parton

You’re so vain — Carly Simon

September — Earth, wind, and fire

Edge of seventeen — Stevie Nicks

80s

Love Shack — b-52s

Jesse’s girl — Rick Springfield

Dancing in the dark — Bruce Springsteen

Africa — ToTo

Never Gonna Give You Up — Rick Astley

Only in my dreams — Debbie Gibson

Careless Whisper — George Michael

Call Me — Blondie

Bohemian Rhapsody— Queen

You to me are everything — the real thing

I got lucky — Elvis Presley

90s

Wonderwall — Oasis

No scrubs — TLC

Fantasy — Mariah Carey

Say my name — Destiny's Child

Waterfalls — TLC

Remember the time — Michael Jackson

Two Princes — Spin Doctors

Torn — Natalie Imbruglia

Iris — Goo Goo Dolls

Kiss From a Rose — Seal

00’s

My Boo — usher, Alicia keys

Not Over You — Gavin DeGraw

Grenade — Bruno Mars

Home — Phillip Phillips

You Found Me — The Fray

Bleeding love — Leona Lewis

Irreplaceable — Beyoncé

Since You’ve Been Gone— Kelly Clarkson

This Love — Maroon 5

If I Ain’t Got You — Alicia Keys

U Remind Me — Usher

I Don't Wanna Be — Gavin DeGraw

‘10s

Diamonds — Rihanna

Talk — Khalid

You Belong With Me — Taylor Swift

Lucky — Jason Mraz

Shape Of You — Ed Sheeran

Treat You Better — Shawn Mendes

Just Give Me a Reason — P!NK

What Do You Mean? — Justin Bieber

Shut Up and Dance — WALK THE MOON

Someone Like You — Adele

no tears left to cry — Ariana Grande

We Don’t Talk Anymore — Charlie Puth

Delicate — Taylor Swift

[yourssinfullyquiche]

Hi. I was wondering if you could write a mlqc fic where mc accidently tells gavin over the phone that she used to have a massive crush on him in high school. Sfw or NSFW please. Thank you

Hi anon! Thank you for your request and patience~ I made it SFW, hope you like it💖

I get a call from Gavin and the dreaded words I do not want to hear drifts over, immediately souring my mood. 

“You’re upset, I know,” Gavin says. 

“I’m not.” 

My words retain a calm, steady tone yet my feelings say otherwise. Annoyance runs through my veins, but the pain in having him away floats above all and threatens to make me cry. I miss him so much, it’s been a month. Now, he may be gone for two. He was supposed to be back last week, so I had everything planned out starting with him staying at home and catching on his sleep. 

It’s so late at night. It is perhaps why his voice sounds so hoarse, tiredness bleeding into it. A part of me feels so sad for him, and the other—the vixen can’t help but feel warm all over. My ears catch a soft chuckle and the annoyance bubbles over—this man has the audacity to find the situation funny. 

“Really?” He says. “So you’re not pouting on the bed wearing my hoodie preparing to eat Magnum Almond?” I hear the mirth clear in his tone.

“...” 

Heat floods to my cheeks. Does he have super sonic evol ears now to hear the freezer opening, I think.

“Shut up, Gavin. And fyi I wear your hoodies all the time even when you’re here, so it doesn’t make a difference”, I shoot back. 

The sweet laughter he lets out—music to my ears, makes me laugh as well and my annoyance dissipates quickly. 

“It’s 1 AM. You know how susceptible you are to colds. Be good and keep that tub of ice cream for tomorrow, alright.” 

A few moments pass before I breathe a sigh conceding to his advice. “Okay,” I mumble cutely. I’m surprisingly malleable when it comes to that silky voice which he uses to persuade me away from poor habits. The reward I get is a virtual kiss and a “good girl” which makes me bite my lips in a smile. 

The kisses he gives over the phone soothe me but it also punctuates my longing for him because all I want is to snuggle closer into the safety of his arms and feel the warmth of his kisses suffuse into my body. I’m quiet as he talks, something Tang Chao did and how Gavin had to punish the whole squad due to his cheekiness. 

To his credit, Gavin quickly notices the lack of response and calls my attention, and the thought that plagues my mind crosses my lips. “Sometimes I wonder how our lives would be if you had not joined the STF, then you wouldn’t have to leave me off somewhere dangerous.”

I continue spilling the contents that live in the deepest parts of my mind ignoring the low hum I hear on the other side of the phone, one that tells me that Gavin’s deep in thought.

“Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we had never reunited at the police station, would I have spent my life never meeting you? Sometimes I wonder where our relationship would be now if I had only summoned the courage and confessed to you about the huge crush I had on you back in high school. There was nothing stopping me, no jobs, no responsibilities, except for my cowardice. I-I just want you here baby, I miss you so much…”

I heave a breath after spitting my innermost thoughts and am met with nothing. Silence. He says nothing to the barrage of words that tumbled out. Did I make him uncomfortable? Truly, I don’t know what I’m waiting for, maybe just a grunt for me to know that he heard it all, something to tell me that sharing my thoughts did not scare him or annoy him. 

Then I hear him draw a shaky breath, and I think he's definitely annoyed with me when I hear his sweet laugh once more. “Did you just say you had a huge crush on me since high school?” asks Gavin. It takes me a while to compute his question as my brain recovers from the silence so my first instinct is to deny, then ever so slowly it clicks. I slap both my palms to my face as everything I said comes to me, as if I’m rewinding a tape. All I want to do now is crawl into a hole and stay buried in it. 

“You know I won’t let you go until I have my answer”, Gavin says with a hint of cheeky authority. My face warms all over thinking about all the times I’ve dreamed of being Gavin Bai, the school’s infamous delinquent’s girlfriend, all the times I’ve passed by his class and saw him sleeping at his desk, just wanting to be next to him and brush the strands of chestnut hair from his eyes; all the times I’ve wished to bravely hold his hands and walk along the corridors.

Eat our lunches together, hang out in the music room as my fingers deftly glide over the keys with him gazing adoringly at me. To spend our evenings in the library as I secretly look over the cover of my Byron copy at him pretending to be interested in studying; and to look into his liquid golden eyes as I inch closer to meet his lips as the wind whips around us at the school balcony. 

I’m embarrassed with my naive misstep but I won’t deny him the truth. 

“Yes,” I say softly. 

I hear Gavin’s breathy laugh, then he says, “So we both had huge crushes on each other…”

Guilt rises up from the pit of my stomach, If only…I begin to think. 

“Stop.” Gavin’s strict tone resounds in my ear. “I know what you’re thinking. Yes we lost our time, and went our separate ways, but we’re here now, together. We are right where we need to be. Everyday I wake up grateful knowing that the woman I love now at 28 is the same kind, beautiful and hardworking woman I loved when I was sixteen. Only now I have the privilege of seeing all her sides that make her who she is, and if that meant us not having our time in high school then so be it. I would want to spend my whole life with you, than have our time end at one phase of our lives.” 

My heart flutters at his words, the guilt I feel washes away replaced with such giddiness, a big smile forms. I so want to kiss his lips. But I know I can’t, so I send my virtual kisses making sure I smack my lips so loud, he knows how much I appreciate his words—him mostly. We talk until the weight of both our jobs settles into our bodies, then we reluctantly say our goodbyes. 

Before he ends the call, he does comfort me, assuring me that he will come back as soon as he can, that he can’t stand the distance as well and that he loves me so much. I tell him to be careful, to take care of himself and that I love him so much. We’re both laughing into the receiver before I end the call and I think, as long as we have the air in our lungs, Gavin and I will always try to make up for lost time once we're together.