#generally using notebooks for… everything… has been so life changing

[piesa2]

i loove data so much i started making a puzzle dictionary that i add any word and description to that i didn’t know

[mollysunder]

Sky and Viktor's relationship is such a horror movie to me. You've got a man who was frustrated by the limitations placed on his life that were out of his control, like his class, mobility, and general health. Despite everything, he manages to rise beyond his station and avoid being an assistant for the rest of his life.

Then you've got a woman from the same background who admires him and all that he's accomplished in spite of the similar class based prejudices they faced all the while she's his assistant. She works up the courage to take leap of faith and reach out to him with her own research to show what's possible if they worked together as equals. And then he gets her killed!

Sky's death isn't the end of it because while it affects Viktor it is in no way meaningful to Sky's life or value as a person whatsoever. Even the pendant he wears in her memory is based on the design of her notebook, but that was just her notebook's cover, she probably bought it from a store and the design itself is probably mass produced. Why not use Sky's signature that was in her letter and in the notebook, the thing part if the notebook with real value?

Then Sky's brought back in s2 and she really only exists to be Viktor's assistant again, who he kills, again! But this time it's different because this time Viktor's making a conscious decision to look Sky in the eye and kill her... to prove he's changed.

In the middle of all this, in no way has Sky's death been mourned by her family or anyone else who could have known her. Jayce wasn't affected by the reveal, he didn't think it was important to tell Heimerdinger, or anyone who knew her. Nothing about her life, death, or disappearance has spurred any emotional reaction or even curiosity about what happened to her.

Sky's new life was also extremely isolated because she became further tied to him (in some ways you could say she was defined by him). Viktor never mentioned Sky to anyone in the material plane during his commune arc, so she only exists to him and she has no way to communicate with others, she's just there for Viktor's sake.

Then in the finale we learn this all a part of a big time loop where Viktor actively set the wheels in motion to have him and Jayce create hextech together, but if everything follows as is, that means Sky is violently killed in those timelines too. That means Viktor weighed the costs and decided over and over and over again that Sky was expendable enough to let her die for his plan to work eventually. How is that not murder at this point?

What's worse is that post-finale Sky's humanity is a point of dispute amongst the fandom, the VAs, and the writers themselves. Sky's the hexcore manipulating Viktor. No, Sky's a manifestion of Viktor's guilt. No, she's actually supposed to represent his humanity/conscious made physical. And in none of these arguments do they discuss Sky as a person, she's just an object meant to serve Viktor both in the narrative sense and literal sense as his assistant.

The most absolutely maddening part is that with Viktor's new bio on the League site, not only have most traces of Viktor had been scrubbed by Piltover's archive, but Sky's life has been completely wiped. Her death was implied to have been swept under the rug, and only described as the "loss of life" consequence from his Hexcore experiment.

Viktor was afraid of dying a senseless death (created by the conditions Piltover condemned his birth to) in obscurity and then he turned it into Sky's destiny.

[krilayt]

So, it's time to clarify a few more details in "my favorite" Bully fandom.

We all condemn ANY death threats, IRL stalking, breaking through the search for personal information like family, etc. BUT! There are also things about the Internet and Aubrey's protection in the fandom.

1. All the excuses related to the fact that she's a "teenager who does edgy things" DON'T WORK AT ALL. No one would probably say a word if she were drawing all these obscenities in her notebook. BUT! Aubrey posted it all on a social network (with the exception of NSFW. Although lol, her defenders may still think that she didn't do it, BUT Aubrey literally wrote in her Tumblr that she draws NSFV, but doesn't publish it here. More funny is the fact that Aubrey herself wrote in the discord that she does not understand the accusations and didn't actually do anything wrong. #Aubrey_did_nothing_wrong😭😭😭, LOOOOL).

She's a teenager, sane, aware of what she's doing and doing it on purpose. And no, not as a ragebite or any of the other bullshit she was using to excuse herself. Do I even have to say that she has done and probably will do bad things? Besides, all the evidence is already on the Internet, so I still don't understand How this "innocent" person can have "knights" who run to protect her no matter what.

2. Ooooh. This short paragraph will be dedicated to one of Aubrey's most ardent defenders. Bifs. That's kind of the nickname this person has, anyway I don't give a fuck. I think people understood who I was talking about.

Dude, instead of running around and excusing a girl who LITERALLY PRODUCES CP AND SUPPORTS NAZISM, you should go touch the grass and do some really good things. Transfer Grandma across the street, etc. Come on, bring benefits to society. And seriously, please reread all the posts with evidence about all these stuff and stop excusing Aubrey. Besides, you said that she supposedly "understood everything and it was just necessary to have a polite conversation." No, man, life doesn't work like that. It sounds like shit anyway. People can't really change in literally less than a day, and besides, it's not the first time Aubrey has been caught creating such things.

3. Some in the fandom think that all this fighting is useless, but no. We need to stop being silent and talk about this as loudly as we can. Otherwise, due to silence, this may become the norm and literally integrate into society, but no one should allow this. The sexualization of minors, NSFV with them, and everything else that Aubrey is involved in – IS NOT NORMAL. STOP DEFENDING IT!!!!!

Well. Everyone has already discussed this topic and a lot has been said, but I just don't understand what's wrong with people in general. I hope there will be less such content, just like its defenders. Peace and happiness to all.

[inolienkiki]

I'm being very vague about plot points and character names here in the faint hope that it may entice some of you to watch this show.

on my... 4th? 5th? rewatch of DARK I'm paying a lot more attention to the character arcs, to figuring out how everyone got to the point they did. For a while the extent of my Adam takes was "haha stupid idiot man point and laugh, you can't even kys correctly" but recently I saw a post that made me stop and think and actually try to empathize with this character. This was immeasurably depressing (which is probably why I hadn't been considering it before).

The material extent of my take hasn't changed- I still think Adam is a truly stoopid person and by far the dumbest out of the three main characters in this show- but the context I have for this has changed a lot. See, each one of these characters is a planner who develops strategies for years down the line and uses all the information at their disposal to make those plans- but the way they get that information, and therefore how much they're able to do with it, is VERY different.

Adam remembers information. Everything he knows he got from his younger self; he functions almost entirely on memory. When he does stuff, like sending his younger self to summer 2019, or sending his sister to the apocalypse, or even attempting to build the God Particle machine in 1888, he's doing it because he remembers how all this stuff happened, and thus needs to keep it that way. Adam never actually seeks out new information, because every time he has in the past, it's absolutely demolished his life. He was investigating at the very beginning of the show- going into the caves, talking to his family members to figure out how much they knew- but at some point, he stops. He's lost that. He no longer views the knot as something to discover or manipulate, he thinks of it as something to escape from, and often completely fails to take others' plans or ideas into account. For 33 years he was sitting on the information that alt-Martha said she knew him, and not once did it occur to him to figure out why she said that or what bearing it might have on his plan. Seriously! If he'd investigated that, he could have altered his plan so it actually worked! And I don't blame him.

Eva generates information. Everything she knows she got from her older selves. Because she has almost absolute control over her own domain, and because she's been working in harmony for almost her whole life, she essentially bootstraps the information back to herself. You could call this working on memory, too, but I think it's a clear enough distinction, since she's actually honest to her younger self once they start working together. We don't have much on Eva, unfortunately, but we do know that her son was responsible for the notebook, and somehow I doubt he went and measured the "megahertz values" of all the cave time travel when they could've just used Adam's notebook and copied them over. (I don't buy that he actually killed Eva, but that's a different story.) Eva's son also works with his younger selves just like she does. Noah and Egon seem to as well, working with her. It's smart, it's thorough, and it totally would have worked, if it hadn't completely backfired.

The White Devil researches information. Out of all the main characters, she seems to do the most research. First off, she's actually a scientist, so naturally it's in her background. Even before she finds out about time travel, she's looking into the incident at the power plant, questioning Bernd about it, and being weird with Tronte. The very first thing she does when she gets access to time travel is go 30 years forward and look herself up. When she can't find her future self again, she realizes she's going to have to do this on her own, and proceeds to do so for the rest of her life. When Eva presents her the opportunity to work with another version of herself, she decides she wants more information, shoots her in the fucking head, and thereby goes and gets it. I'm confident that out of all the characters in this entire show (apart from origin HGT) this character is the only one who has any idea how time travel works or what to do with it. I love her for it.

So, I guess... trust the numbers, not yourself?

[maximumdino]

The Safe Ship, Harbored Legacy Challenge

Introduction

Hello! I am Maximum Dinosaur. I make videos on youtube, and challenges for the sims 4. I decided to make a long and somewhat niche legacy challenge based on something very near and dear to my heart: The Crane Wives.

This challenge is based on the Crane Wives' first album, Safe Ship Harbored. There are 12 generations that I've tried very hard to make fun and dramatic! I've made a short video going over this challenge briefly on my youtube channel if you're interested!

{This is part 1 of The Crane Wives Ultimate Legacy Challenge! Navigate through the rest on my main page or in the link above}

You can find the graphic for these generations here!

Generational Rules

The generations are mostly focused on stories but have small little skill, aspiration, or miscellaneous challenges to add onto the fun of the generation. No gatekeeping here, though, this is just for fun and there’s no shame in removing a few rules from a challenge for any reason.

Each generation has a color palette that are all based around the track (or the vibes I get from it!) Some are easier than others, and some have stronger stories than others. Hopefully, it'll give you some good variety in your game.

Recommended on normal lifespan, but any lifespan is fine.

The aspiration or career listed in the rules does not have to be completed unless it specifically says so.

Bending rules is fine. Don't have a pack? Cool, change the rules. Don't like a skill? Cool, don't do it. I couldn't care less. This challenge is about the enjoyment of the players, so go wild.

Rules are not listed in any order and can be completed in any order unless explicitly stated that something happens before or after another requirement.

Each generation has a color palette that's really just for fun, it doesn't have to be intense or overpowering.

Cheats are not allowed unless to cheat baby number or gender.

Have fun :D

Generations

Generation 1: Can't Have It All

“You won't find me where you left me, no, I'm long gone I won't bargain, I won't break My mind's made up, though my head still aches  All my love you tried to take, but you can't have it all”

From a young age, you've been smitten with one of your classmates. You daydream about life together, writing their name in hearts in your notebook and do everything else that someone in love would do. So when you have the golden opportunity to talk to them, you take it. As you dive headfirst into a relationship with them, you pour all of your love into them. And as you grow older, they control more and more of what you can do. You start to realize that maybe this isn't healthy, but you struggle to stand up for yourself at all. But when they want to advance in your relationship farther than you're comfortable with, you reject them softly- and they don’t take the rejection well, and you end up dumped and alone. You never had a chance to be an adult without them. What now? How do you move on?

Colors: Blue & Green

Traits: Recycle Disciple, Generous, Lovebug (Switch to Romantically Reserved after breakup)

Starting as a teenager, get with your first romantic partner who you put all your love and emotion into. Start the soulmate aspiration with them.

As time goes on, they become controlling. As young adults, your partner dumps you after you refuse to take the next step in your relationship.

Pour your love into becoming a Civil Designer and environmental activist after the breakup. Join the Green Technician Branch.

Max out the fabrication skill and complete the Eco Innovator Aspiration

Bake for your loved ones and reach level 10 of the Baking Skill

Move onto a better life without them. When they try to return using your emotions to get you back, stand your ground.

Generation 2: The Diving Bell

“I will drown for you, sink to black from blue, and let the water win  Wear you 'round my waist, hold your heart like waves, opening my lungs to let you in Swallow my heart whole, sink me like a stone Water rushes in… and I will welcome it - I am not afraid to give you everything”

You were raised with love and caution, but to keep things light, your parent would spin their warnings into whimsical stories as you say together by the lakeside. Those stories of caution and life lessons that your parent taught you inspired you to look beyond reality and into the world of poetry. You always had a positive outlook on life, though your poetry never shied from expression of negativity and sorrow. The poetry is your outlet, and your elegiac downfall. When you meet Them, all of the artistic pieces fall into place. You couldn't have written your meeting better yourself. You find beauty in Their depths, in the worst parts of Them. You write it into your poems, and you turn Their flaws into art. They drag you down into the depths of the waters in a way no weight had before. You don't think of the possible consequences, nor do you really care. You aren't afraid. You'd be happy to give anything to them.

Colors: Gold & Deep Blue

Traits: Cheerful, Active, Loyal

Since childhood, always have a pool, pond, lake or ocean near or in your home. Swim as a hobby, reaching fitness level 10.

Enter the diver career as a teenager.

Become a successful author (writer, author branch), reaching level 10 of the career, though you prefer writing poetry on your own time.

Meet your lover in a way you can only describe as poetic.

Write poetry collections throughout your life, reach writing level 10, and complete the Bestselling Author Aspiration.

Ignore any issues in your relationship with your lover and spin them into poetry.

Make a huge sacrifice for the one you love.

Generation 3: New Colors

“Orange, yellow, green, it's all the same to me- I've seen them all a million times before I have half a mind, to climb up in the sky and to steal new colors away from the sun Don't tell me that I can't, Oh Lord, don't tell me that I can't, I need this so damn bad I'd give up my sight to see, I'd give up my air to breathe”

The world is cruel. It's always been cruel. Kids would tease and torment you in school, and things didn't seem to get better as you grew. Your ideas were turned into jokes from your peers, especially the ideas pertaining to Sixam. The planet with so many unknowns and mysteries. They call you an obsessed lunatic, but that won't stop you. You're going to make it to Sixam, no matter the cost. You tried to give other people a chance, you didn't want to be right about the human condition, but every time, you’re left in a worse state than before. So you vow to never give another senselessly cruel person a chance. That is, until you stumble across someone who doesn't have any of the terrible traits you see in others. They're colorful, expressive, and they're nothing like the people who ridiculed you your entire life. So, you fall deeply in love, unexpectedly but beautifully. Now, you have a support system as you venture for Sixam, ready to learn about the curious planet and what may be lurking there.

Colors: Pink & Yellow

Traits: Overachiever, Genius, Your Choice

Complete the Whiz Kid Aspiration.

Fall in love with a colorful, artsy sim; the only person you could ever fall for

Reach level 10 of the Astronaut Career (Space Ranger Branch)

Build a rocket ship in your backyard and reach level 10 of the rocket science skill

Complete space prints, geodes, & space rocks collections.

You refuse to put your life to waste. Reach the "Dreams Fulfilled" Tier of the Soul's Journey.

Do anything to make it to space. Become the first sim to step onto Sixam’s surface.

Reach a point in your life where you must make a decision to follow your dreams at a cost, or continue with an average life.

Have a child with someone other than your love, one of the senselessly cruel people you meet. Have at least two children total.

Generation 4: Caleb Trask

“So you got bad in your blood… brother, you're one of us How long are you gonna wait for those azaleas to bloom? How long are you gonna wait for them to burn? We're the daughters of sinners, we're the sons of saints Blood doesn't mean a thing… Stop waiting on those flowers”

Your earliest memories were of blind and raging jealousy. Your sibling reached all milestones before you. Your sibling got more attention at family events than you, and the pattern continued. You began to despise them and everything they succeeded at. Of course, the feeling was one-sided. They didn't hate you, which makes you hate them more. You blame your hatred on your blood, but you know that isn't true, and so do those who’re around you. In order to make an impression, you marry a person who’s quite ideal, someone who thinks they can help you become a better person. You continue to keep up appearances, daydreaming about what people will think when they see how put-together you are, and how they may compare you to your sibling and see you as the victor. You join the military, a much respected career bound to give you an admirable image. That is, as long as you keep the secretive work you've been doing quiet. You're beyond redemption to some, pitied by others. It might not be too late to turn back, like your spouse and family want you to. But that's a decision you must make.

Colors: Red & Dark Pink

Traits: Jealous, Neat, Evil (May change throughout the gen of you so please)

Have a terrible relationship with at least one sibling out of jealousy. Be outshined by them in many aspects, and obsess over being better than them.

Marry someone who’s the child of a ‘saint’. Have a good relationship, but fight over parenting choices.

Maintain a flower garden with your spouse, slowly leaving it to only them to keep the flowers alive.

Neglect your parental duties to do shady business with shady people. Be welcomed into the corrupted special forces. Reach level 10 of the Military career.

Max out the handiness skill, adamant on ‘fixing’ every issue in your family to keep up appearances that you are better off than your sibling.

Throughout your life, your spouse begs for you to turn back from the bad decisions you make. Make promises to them you do not keep.

Take everything from your sibling.

Generation 5: Counting Sheep

“You sigh into your cup of coffee as you watch the morning news There goes your good day, there's the knot on the noose When the wool is off your eyes you'll stop counting sheep at night, cause you eat your fill up during the daytime Something in you's fast asleep, afraid to be who you will be- it's a losing battle, so why are you still fighting?”

Your parents caused more turbulence in your life than anything else in your early years. You saw all your parent did to hurt the world as an important militant at the top of the power chain. They tried to conceal it from you, but they could not fool you. You were lied to- everyone was. Now that you know the truth, it makes life so much more torturous. At first, you try to play it like everyone else, oblivious, depressed, and bored out of your goddamn mind. You join a lackluster job, and try to join the masses in their soul-sucking, repetitive lives. You wake up every morning like the robot you are, despising your alarm clock, dreading your day, and fearing your life ahead when you see the disturbing news on the TV each day. But it wasn't a sustainable life for someone who yearns for happiness. On a random Tuesday, you have a rude awakening after an unexpected event, leaving you more sure than ever that you want to make a change in your life… and hopefully, if all goes well, in the lives of others, too.

Colors: Silver & Red

Traits: Vegetarian, Gloomy, Good

As a child, see the damage your military parent had caused. Those around you can't see the world burn, but you could never unsee it. Watch the news every day, haunted by the terrible things going on.

Gain the Coffee Fanatic Lifestyle

Start in a passionless career, but don't make it far. After an event that leaves you in shambles and angry at unfair society, quit and join the politician career.

Reach level 10 of the politician career (charity organizer branch).

Hold public debates about topics you’re passionate about. Reach level 10 of Research and Debate.

Have a turbulent relationship with your militant parent, but be close with your other parent, sibling(s), grandparents, and parents’ siblings. Raise your children well and close to their extended family… but keep them away from your militant parent. Reach parenting level 10 and complete the big happy family aspiration.

Knit as a casual hobby, teaching your descendants to knit skillfully.

Try to open the eyes of others to the terrible things around them your whole life.

Generation 6: Hole in The Silver Lining

“If there's a hole in the silver lining, I'll be the one to find it I take it upon myself to make sure I do- I might find nothing when I start looking But I turn it over in my hands until my fingers wear it through Leave your doubt at the door, don't you take another step”

As you grew up, your parent spent most of their time trying to make the world a better place. But… well, you've never been one for optimism. You can't really place why, maybe it's because of all you've been taught about the world, your obsessive compulsions, or maybe it's just the way you were born. You refuse to find good in most situations, a self destructive process you can't quite seem to escape. Despite your macabre nature, no one can doubt that you have a wonderful sense of style. You don’t typically utilize it unless styling others, not quite confident enough to dress yourself in your beautiful designs. The endless cycle of pushing your own hopes down and letting your doubts stop you is nothing short of tiring. After opportunities, dreams, and relationships have been ruined due to this unfortunate trait of yours, you start to wonder if maybe life doesn't have to be like this, if you can learn to leave the part of you that's tortured you for so long behind. But it takes a lot to undo the cycle, and it will be a long process… but for once, you face some optimism that maybe, just maybe, you can escape your own mind.

Colors: Teal & Silver

Traits: Paranoid, Macabre, Perfectionist

Have an unlucky childhood, leading to built up fears and anxieties as an adult.

Ruin multiple relationships out of paranoia and skepticism.

Reject an opportunity of a lifetime, too anxious over the thought that the outcome will be poor.

Reach the Stylist Branch of the Style Influencer Career

Complete Lord of the Knits aspiration

Max out the photography and knitting skills 

Design and style impeccable fashion pieces, but stay behind the scenes and avoid the attention on yourself. After all, nothing good can come of your own success, right?

Slowly learn to leave your doubt at the door, leave behind your extreme pessimism and embrace whatever may come next with a neutrality you didn't have before.

Generation 7: Safe Ship, Harbored

“Where does your faith fall in me? Don't break the bottle, don't waste your blessings on me I'll always wonder what's across the tossing ocean, the world I'm at looks really flat to me I am a safe ship, harbored, losing all of my good years to the shallow water Watch me give up, honey- I swore I never would - I wasn't born a safe ship, something wore me down”

Your parent made you promise to live better than them, to avoid negativity and live free of your own mind. You made friends who matched your high speeds, and who shared your love for the waters and creatures within them. You tried everything you could, swam as far as the horizon reached, greeting the sea animals as friends without fear. You had passion for helping marine life, and you wouldn't let anything stop you. Your family was so proud of you… until someone else came along. They made you love them, they made you trust them. But they made up your relationship out of lies, leaving you afraid of your own reflection, your island home, and to your dismay, the waters you used to love. Suddenly, no risk seems worth it, and no part of life seems worth living. Wild and more unburdened in your youth, you're now faced with the reality that you've let everyone you love down. Nobody else knew why you changed. Your friends left you behind, for you couldn't keep up anymore. Your parents didn't say it, but you knew they were disappointed that you changed. They promised they’d never stop their faith in you, but now, you're starting to wonder if they should. You're ruined, after all. You're a ship who never left the harbor, not after you came back to land, hurting more than ever.

Colors: Orange & Teal

Traits: Adventurous, Dance Machine, Child of the Islands

Live in Sulani and immerse yourself in Sulani culture, befriending dolphins and exploring the murky caves and volcanoes of the island.

Start with a passion for guitar, abandon it, coming back to it later, reaching level 10 of the skill. Dance and play around a beach bonfire with your family.

Work as a lifeguard as a teenager and reach the top of the career. Transfer over to become a conservationist (marine Biologist branch) as a young adult.

Someone you love betrays you on an adventure, leaving you unable to take the daring leaps anymore. You stay adventurous, you stay curious. But you can't bring yourself to act on it. In your dark mental space, gain a fear of water.

When you become more reserved, quit the marine biologist career out of fear. You may return to it if you're able to overcome your fear of water.

Complete the Buried Treasure Collection

Complete the Renaissance Sim aspiration.

Generation 8: Naked, The Night Falls

“Can't keep my senses from your taste- into your arms, sell my sorry soul Been enraptured and tied, turn your ghosts into mine - all the years, I'm alive Naked, the night falls in your eyes, slowly I burn like the autumn leaves Brittle as ash but when I rise - love I will learn”

Life is never better than when a furry friend is in your arms. You inherited your love of animals from your parents, but they love aquatics and you love the creatures of the land. You’ve always felt drawn to the complex animals roaming the lands, and the nature and life surrounding them. Humans are a particularly fascinating species to you, animals pretending to be something above mammals. You are intrigued by the way that humans love, especially once you experience it for yourself. You don't argue with the irresistible attraction drawing you to your love interest, and you let yourself fall right into their arms. A meet cute, some people call it, but you call it fate. They're not a perfect person, but you're perfect for each other, and you take their hands, and promise to share their problems, Legs in tangles on the bed, daydreaming together as your identities intertwine. Nothing can come between you and your love’s vulnerability within each other, and nothing can reverse the way that you transformed each other into better versions of yourselves.

Colors: Indigo & Orange

Traits: Clumsy, Cat/Dog/Horse Lover, Nosy

Meet the love of your life as the night falls, be the most attracted to them as possible.

Keep the love strong through elderhood and beyond. Reach romance level 10.

Watch the sunset every weekend with the ones you love.

Have an animal companion you spend your whole life past teenhood with (use anti-aging treats or cheats… they're your first baby. Max pet training and riding.

Work as a romance Consultant (matchmaker branch) Max out the career.

Raise and rescue other animals throughout your lifetime with your partner. Complete the Friend of the Animals aspiration.

Your love is a good person, but burdened. Share their hardships and help them through them. You intertwine identities and live the rest of your life by their side.

Have a near-death experience leaving you weak and brittle. Recover with the help of your lover and animal companions.

Generation 9: Ancient History

“My dreams keep diggin' up the bones of memories, discarded remnants of former times Now every skeleton is slappin' its knees, laughin' at the holes he left behind My poor heart is an open wound - It's ancient history that's bleedin' out of me So what am I supposed to do? I try to let it fade away but I still hold on”

Like the generations before you, you've greatly enjoyed adventure. You love the hands-on, scholarly side of science, fascinated by the world’s creations. However, it's not easy to find a stable job in the wild, so you settle for a well-paying position as a scientist in a place far from the natural world. It was alright, though, and you learned to be okay with that way of living. But your situation takes a turn when something dreadful enters your life, stopping you in your tracks, and making every second of your time hell. You expect to be able to push through and get out to the other end stronger, but that never happens. And as you suffer, you start to realize that it's effecting the people around you, including your beloved child(ren). You know that if you leave, your family will be at peace. In an effort to save your children from your situation, and to possibly start fresh without the burden on your shoulders, you take off for the jungle alone.

You settle into your new life as best as you can, and you love your newfound explorative freedom- but while the trouble isn't around anymore, you have to deal with the remains of it. It haunts your nightmares, and you start regretting leaving your kid(s)... they're the only part of your history you want back. The sad truth that you can't change history starts to soak in.

Colors: Brown & Indigo

Traits: Loves Outdoors, Genius, Chased by Death

Start working as a scientist in a populated area. 

Something long-standing in your life has been torturing you, and you've about had it. Move far away from your trauma to a desolate place. Lose touch with at least one of your children in the process, leaving them with a different family for their own good (or so you think).

Max the archeology & gemology skills.

Max out the Scientist Career.

Spend much of your time exploring Selvadorada and studying the things you find in the depths of the jungle in the lab, a more hands on approach.

Complete the Archaeology Scholar aspiration and the Ancient Omiscan Artifacts and Crystal* collections.

No matter what you do… your trauma ends up following you anyway, whether it's mentally or physically.

Learn to let go.

Eventually reunite with your child(ren).

*Excluding crystals only found on Sixam

Generation 10: October

“Come, my dear, and be a part of my home- missing stitch and flowers on a headstone But I will crawl like a sinner to be at your feet… should God or the devil ever ask for me Take my word, but keep the upper hand - I know you, you're the daughter of a lonely man So kiss me quick, steal every secret I keep, there is no more room in your heart for me… Oh, my love”

Your parents left you behind because they thought it was better for you- and it was, growing up. You had everything you needed, everything you wanted… but sometimes, it takes one thing to change a relationship you thought would last forever. You met a woman who captured your focus and whispered sweet promises to you… and immediately, you were hers. You’re both lonely women descending from lonely people, and both deemed as sinful outcasts when you take her home to your family. Their smiles faltered when you introduced her, and the night grew dark as your parents berated you with an anger you’d never seen in them before. You could never understand what they hated so much about your love. But to them, the pure devotion and intense love only meant a deeper sin.

You want your partner to be part of every moment of your life, but your community would never stand for it. But you refuse to let them stop you. History must know of your love, you determine. Still,  you don’t think that she will come with you, turning away from her whole life… but she does, for the both of you. It’s not long before the news broke in your former community. You’re dead. Or, at least, they think you are.

Your parent left you behind long ago, and now, you're leaving, too. But this time, there will be no regrets. No one comes to drop flowers by your gravestones back in your hometown, anyway. In your new community, however, you’re no longer treated with judgement and resentment, but care and belonging. And now, you can turn your eyes to her without worry or shame.

Colors: Peach & Brown

Traits: Loner, Romantic, Freegan

Be raised well by a family chosen by your runaway parent, but when you come home with a woman, they turn on you. 

Fall in love with a woman and become engaged

Fake your deaths together because no one in your current life sees you for who you are. Run away and bring your fiance with you.

Find a tight knit, small community who sees you for who you are in your new life.

Make and sell Flower arrangements in a small, family owned corner shop after running away. Max the flower arranging skill.

Spend late nights with your wife making and drinking nectar, and max out the nectar making skill.

Complete the soulmate aspiration.

Start to write in journals documenting your love and keep them to yourself until you die, leaving them to your child(ren)’s inheritance.

Generation 11: The Crooked, The Cradle

“There's blood in the water, the quiet are restless, the silent are still… My enemies crawl, we're alone with the kill- Can anyone hear me? This cradle still burns like a hole in my chest…  The crooked are smiling, they know me the best But I pray, when it's done, when it's through, I'll have something left for you”

You didn't realize how hard school would be, and you weren't prepared for how cruel kids could be. Socially inept, you didn't know what to do when your classmates started to pick on you. None of your other classmates stood up for you. And as the bullying excellated, you internalized the mean words, spending nights crying and kicking yourself for being who you are. It must be your fault, you think, otherwise why would you deserve this?

Eventually, you graduate, but the damage has been done. You've been broken down and beaten to the point you no longer can recognize yourself. Maybe if you’d push yourself into adulthood, the childhood that haunted you will be left in the past. When you stumble upon a gang who seem to immediately welcome you, you stick around. They convinced you they're the only ones who could possibly understand you, you're one in the same, that they know you better than anyone. You believe them- because you'd never belonged with a good crowd. You do as they ask, and you fit right in, or so you think. But a shocking death leaves you unable to see the gang as your crew anymore. You're meek, messy, and a social wreck, but you aren't evil. So you leave. After all you've done, your parents welcome you back with open arms. You're still their baby, and they're willing to help you heal- but also to push you to never stop trying things and meeting people. But if you do end up finding someone who’ll treat you right… will there be any part of you left for them?

Colors: Mint & Peach

Traits: Childish, Slob, Socially Awkward

Suffer through brutal bullying when young.

Get involved in a gang who convinces you you fit in, that you're one in the same. Join the criminal career.

Witness a death that changes the way you see the world and people around you.

Leave the gang and career, and with nowhere else to go, come back to your parents’ open arms.

Learn to take care of yourself, maxing out the wellness skill. When emotions are high, practice wellness to clear your mind.

Take up work as a part time retail employee and a full time parent. Have a knack for programming and perform side jobs to support your family. Reach programming level 10.

Complete a wellness aspiration.

Because of a fear of being a bad parent, be a bit overprotective of your kids. Earn the strict family dynamic, though you want the best for them.

Generation 12: I Ain't Done

“I am a pretty young thing, I am consumed with selfish wanting You expose my nightly wandering, you put me in the ground, but I ain't done I have all the time I need to repent my wicked deeds… Swear that they still hear me scream He follows her into the night, finds her sleeping with another… by morning there were no survivors”

Under your parents somewhat suffering guidance, you had an uneventful and restricted experience in high school. You met someone, and it seemed perfect, or at least, it was supposed to be. You went with it- in fact, you went with everything in your life, following the current. Still, you managed to keep up a mischievous spirit, which your sweetheart doesn't totally appreciate, but they love you enough to get over it.

After graduation, you jump right into a marriage, unaware that you had other options to explore. Engulfed in their dreams, family, family business, and home. you ignored any bad signs your spouse showcased, you lived your life, knowing that something was missing. You were naive, despite your front- so when you found yourself falling for someone other than your spouse, you make the mistake of allowing yourself to do so. Slowly, you start to spend more and more time sneaking out for your affair. You had little guilt- this was what felt right. But one fateful night, your spouse decided to follow you when you left at night. You didn’t notice. There was screaming, bloody murder, begging and apologies, and in the end, you were gone. Your spouse, the person you loved, but not enough, the person who you cared for, but not more than your affair- had killed you. And by the time of daybreak, the ones that you most cared about lied in the ground next to you.

Colors: Black & Mint

Traits: Goofball, Self Assured, Your Choice

Get married very young to your first partner, sheltered from the idea of exploration. Live in this unsatisfying marriage for years.

Help with your spouse’s family business as undertaker (funeral director branch).

Complete the Chief of Mischief aspiration as an outlet for your unfulfilled life.

Have an affair under the moonlight with one person you truly love. When your spouse finds out, they kill you, and fight your lover to the death.

Max out the mischief, medium and thanatology skills.

Become a hotheaded sim in death and achieve Transcendent Wraith ghost mastery. Haunt your ex spouse’s family graveyard for the rest of eternity.

After death, only befriend occults. Seek vengeance, though your traitor is also in the ground.

And that's all! Stay tuned for more :D

[talesofsonicasura]

Venomous Call

I decided to go more in depth with KN8/Venom crossover idea. There will be some comic elements but it's mostly based on the movie version of the Lethal Protector. For this part, I'll be going over the Kafka's early "Venom Days". Any questions can be asked on my main blog, @sonicasura. Let's get started. Part 2 here. Part 3 is here.

A 25 year old Kafka has life changed forever on one fateful night. He's trying to get his life together after having failed his last shot at the Defense Force. A task that proves very difficult when recruitment ads are plastered everywhere to remind him about his broken promise.

Could Kafka's life get any worse? Well being hit with a meteorite can officially be crossed off his bucket list as that's what happens. A 7 pound hunk of space rock piercing his right lung. Before Kafka loses consciousness due to blood and air loss, he sees something ooze from the meteorite.

The man wakes up back in his bed but he feels off. Like he isn't alone and fuller than usual. Kafka is completely oblivious about the news report where the bodies of the local Yakuza were found in a headless bloody pile.

Well until a growling voice comments how tasty the dead kaiju he's cutting up. Or that the black sludge which used to be his right arm had thrown away the saw and is eating at the corpse. Kafka's just glad no one else was next to him right now.

I will say the start for our himbo's partnership with Venom is less awkward than what Movie Eddie had to deal with. Kafka will question the symbiote about everything as he keeps any info in a notebook. He does puke when Venom tells him they ate a few humans(the Yakuza) earlier.

The man is much more adverse at the idea of cannibalism but he has barely any choice in the matter. Symbiotes sometimes need the required nutrients in their purest state which includes brains from living creatures. Humans have more phenylethylamine than small pest kaiju and the larger ones aren't present much.

Thus Kafka aims Venom's hunger at the criminal underworld. Like Eddie, he is very compatible with the symbiote although on a higher level so all his senses are tied to Vee's when they fully 'suit up'. Our himbo eventually grows numb to the taste of human flesh but it still mentally fucks him up sometimes.

Kafka's Venom form is quite different from the others. He is 10'9 in height, has two long horns similar to his kaiju form, a long bulky tail, rigged spikes going down his spine, white stripes on his arms, legs, neck, and tail. Venom will later add the Hoshina Clan Emblem for their chest symbol. (The symbiote thought it looked cool.)

Like the comic book adaptation, he uses natural webs to get around than just the tendrils the symbiote can provide. These abilities stem from Venom feeding on the kaiju corpses. Other comic related powers are: poisonous fangs, self-sustenance, flight(generating dragon wings), Morphomerge (bond with inanimate objects like vehicles to an extent), Energy Absorption and Transference.

There's a case of mistaken identity for a while. Venom kills No.7 and the Defense Force arrives on the scene before the Lethal Protector could leave. They assume he's the daikaiju, not the corpse. It takes a while before the Defense Force realizes that Kaiju No.7 had been neutralized and this is something else entirely.

Mina loathes Venom quite a bit. One being that the 'kaiju' likes to toy with her while calling the Captain "Pretty Lady". (Kafka is quietly dying on the inside whenever the symbiote does this.) The second reason being how Venom acts like a protector despite the fact he eats humans rather than just kaiju.

In short, Mina thinks he's a high and mighty monstrous hypocrite. Soshiro is a different case. He has a fun little 'rivalry' with Venom whenever he comes across them. Kafka obviously doesn't find being sliced and diced fun. Soshiro is quick to joke about the modified Hoshina emblem on the Lethal Protector's chest.

He finds the whole bit amusing even with Venom's man eating tendencies. They are labeled Capture Dead or Alive. He is one of the first cases where a kaiju not only has human level sapience and intelligence but a (twisted) moral compass too.

It didn't take to uncover Venom's weakness to fire. That opened up a bigger shitstorm as Mina witnesses some of Kafka's human form underneath the black ooze. She didn't see his face but it was enough to reveal the Lethal Protector needs a host to operate.

Venom obviously has a constantly updating file in the Defense Force archives. The major details are always highlighted such as his ability to adapt. Soshiro had accidentally bumped into the Lethal Protector gorging on a dragon Honju's corpse during a patrol.

Venom hadn't been in the mood to fight so our Vice Captain got front row seats to him sprouting wings that were heavily similar to the monster he had been eating. This was the first incident to raise him up the list of Defense Force priorities. Biggest is obviously the host bit.

That had gotten everyone in a tizzy as it means Venom was potentially lurking inside a human host. Many questions and theories were bounced around. 'Is the host aware of the entity in their body?' 'Are they even alive or just a corpse being puppeted?'

It made building a sensor to detect the Lethal Protector top priority amongst the Science Department. This includes smaller models as they now had to scan the civilian population for Venom's host. Everything only gets more difficult for Kafka when the DF discovers the symbiote's weakness to high frequency sounds.

It had been at a trafficking ring disguised as a rave den. One of Venom's prey accidentally turned up the stereos in fright when the Defense Force had busted down the door. The higher frequency made the Lethal Protector howl in pain before he destroyed the devices.

He obviously ran but it was too late to keep this weakness a secret. With these two major weak spots known, the Defense Force would soon concoct a plan to uncover Venom's true identity and apprehend him. I'm on the fence about Kafka escaping with his identity in tact or becoming a wanted man.

There's some very tasty angst with the latter as Mina is obviously part of this operation. Seeing her childhood friend underneath the monstrous black mass would already hurt. To see him choose the monster and the creature chastising her for abandoning him is the coup de grace.

Especially if the only thing Kafka could say is something like 'I'm sorry for being a worthless friend' before he flies off as Venom. He no doubt has negative feelings for his lost friendship with Mina. Plus symbiotes tend to bring such emotions closer to the surface in their hosts.

She is obviously gonna chase after Kafka. Those words pretty much addressed the part of her that Mina tries not to. How she essentially abandoned Kafka because he couldn't get into the Defense Force.

The regret that her purposely distancing herself from him led to the Captain's childhood friend to become Venom. And how much it ate away at him. Mina will want to fix this as Kafka is her responsibility in the end.

Even if it means putting the man inside a kaiju containment cell.

@discoknack @foolmariofest @noodlesbf-blog @mechazushi @scribblermerlin @giantgoblin @kafkahibinomybeloved @drmarune @renard-dartigue

[itsheccincheebs]

do u have any more reader and bakugou snippets to share perhaps? :3

Content Warnings:

-general angst

Another snippet from my upcoming three-part Bakugou/Reader fic:

feelings change (but your fingerprints remain)

𓆩♡𓆪

When you wake Friday morning, it’s to the sound of a downpour. Your head pounds a painful rhythm and the corners of your eyes where your desperate hands rubbed away the onslaught of tears the night before feel raw. The person that stares back in your bathroom mirror is a defeated husk, a shallow imitation of who you used to be.

You reach deep inside yourself to find the person you were before you ever knew someone named Midoriya Izuku and come up empty-handed. There is no going back to the cold, unfeeling ball of angst that put up walls to hide from imaginary enemies. No matter how much you scream and cry and deny, deny, deny, being surrounded by people who’d risk life and limb for each other changed you. For the better.

For the worse.

Because now you are victim to the full brunt of your emotions and the terrible truth is that you can’t find it in yourself to be happy for them. Betrayal seethes beneath waves of despair, a monster borne of irrationality because Todoroki never took anything from you. Midoriya Izuku was never a prize to be won. He was the secret object of your affections, yes, but he still made his choice all on his own.

Now you can’t stand to look at either of them.

The signs were right there, and you were so wrapped up in your stupid crush that you were blind to them.

‘Guess I’m not cut out for romance,’ you think cynically. Figures someone with a power like yours would lend itself to a terrible love life.

By the time you more or less put yourself together and head to class, you’re very nearly late. The only mercy you’re given is you’re able to avoid any nosy classmates. The memory of Shinsou’s face last night, stricken and full of guilt, cuts through your thoughts as you stare down the pouring rain beneath your umbrella.

What will he say?

What will you say?

God, what purpose would his apology serve, in the end? That he’s sorry for your lot in life, that he shouldn’t have made fun of you if he knew how things were gonna shake up? He had no way of knowing, of course, but everything’s fucked and you’re stranded, too proud to accept any comfort even now.

Just the thought of it makes your shoulders rise with revulsion. Empty platitudes won’t erase what you know. What good will crying into Shinsou’s shoulder do? It won’t have Izuku running into your arms, and at this point, knowing what an obvious fool you’ve been these past couple of months, you’re not sure you even want that anymore. You never held Izuku’s heart despite what your arrogance told you. He never wanted you and he never will, especially now that he has his precious Shouto-kun to make all his dreams come true.

You exhale through your nose and put your umbrella on the rack just inside the main school building.

What a mess.

Walking into class is remarkably easy in spite of what’s coming.

And when your eyes flick over to Izuku who’s huddled over a well-loved notebook with your supposed best friend Todoroki, you see now what you didn’t before. It’s the easy touches with their knees, the way they lean ever so slightly towards the other, the swift glances they steal, like their eyes can’t resist the draw of the other and the pink that colors their cheeks when caught.

It’s like a sucker punch to the gut and the fact that you’re still upright, let alone walking is a feat unto itself.

𓆩♡𓆪

Ask and ye shall receive, my fren.🧡

[astrronomemes]

GIRL, INTERRUPTED (1999): STARTERS

a collection of quotes, phrases, and sayings from the 1999 film adaptation of the Susanna Kaysen memoir, Girl, Interrupted. change & alter as needed.

"Have you ever confused a dream with life?"

"Don't tell me what you think. Take it to the lab."

"Sometimes, it's hard for me to stay in one place."

"Time can move backwards and forwards, and now to then, and back again, and you can't control it."

"I think young women should make up their own mind, don't you?"

"You need to go somewhere where you can get a genuine rest."

"You're hurting everyone around you."

"I didn't try to kill myself."

"That's the kind of thing you talk about in therapy, honey. Not here."

"Look, I'm not gonna burn my bra, or drop acid, or go march on Washington. I just don't want to end up like my mother."

"I need you to stay close to me, because it's easy to get lost in here."

"I won't be here that long. I'm just here for a rest."

"You've been gone for two weeks. A lot of shit has gone down."

"I mean, everybody thinks about it at some point."

"I think you should lock the door."

"Fuck his brains out. Use a rubber."

"You've been feeling bad in general, right? You've been feeling depressed."

"I haven't exactly been a ball of joy, [name]."

"He didn't say. He thought it would 'affect my recovery'."

"I must have missed that in the brochure."

"I mean, what kind of sex isn't casual?"

"You know, I know all about you. And I hope they put you away forever."

"What if I had a punctured artery? You'd go on your rounds, ignoring my wounds?"

"I tried to kill myself, [name]."

"What do they know about being normal?"

"Look, I know that this sounds crazy, but I think I love you."

"I want to leave... but not with you. Not with you."

"I just like you, that's all. I wish you were getting better, though."

"If talking did shit, we'd be out of here by now."

"Another one of my theories is that you people don't know what you're doing."

"It means I don't care. That's what it means."

"I'm just gonna rest for a while. Just a little while."

"You know, I can take a lot of crazy shit from a lot of crazy people, but you? You are not crazy."

"What's wrong with me? What the fuck is going on inside my head?!"

"I'm sorry for being a bitch. I was a drag."

"They didn't release you because you're better. They just gave up."

"I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in, but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try and kill the thing on the inside."

"How am I supposed to recover when I don't even understand my disease?"

"I think what you've got to do is put it down, put it away, put it in your notebook... but get it out of yourself."

"You want to be rested for tomorrow. The last night is a long one."

"So nice of you to pass judgment on us now that you're cured."

"I'm playing the villain, like you want. I give you everything you want."

"I played the fucking villain. Just like you wanted."

"No one cares if you die, [name]. Because you're dead already."

"Maybe everyone out there is a liar, and maybe the whole world is stupid and ignorant, but I'd rather be fucking in it than down here with you."

"Crazy isn't being broken, or swallowing a dark secret. It's you or me... amplified."

"They were not perfect. But they were my friends."

[rose-sophia-isabella-rogers]

A Tide That Turned Everything: Chapter VII - I Loved, Love and Will Love You Forever

Chapter Summary: Ilya Morozova saves Aleksander and gives you a way to be with your lover maybe even forever. Your loyalty to General Kirigan forces you once again to make a life-changing choice. But not only you. Aleksander has to choose as well. Power… or you. Is he ready to throw all he's built for a Tidemaker that was once a serving girl?

Pairing: Aleksander Kirigan/Reader, Alina Starkov/Mal Oretsev, Ivan/Fedyor Kaminsky

Characters: Aleksander Kirigan, Reader, Fedyor Kaminsky, Ivan, Mal Oretsev, Zoya Nazyalensky, Nikolay Lantsov, Ilya Morozova, Genya Safin, David Kostyk, Baghra, Tamar Kir-Bataar, Tolya Yul-Bataar

Word Count: 4284

A/N: Smut alert (a really short). If you don't like it or are underage, don't read from: "You quickly undress each other." to: "He falls on the blanket next to you and pulls you to himself.". Enjoy! Inspired by prompts: https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089554941/ https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089559859/

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@budugu

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

'He'll live,' the man (Morozova?) says, leaving his hut. You, Fedyor and Ivan jump, startled. You look at him with wide eyes.

'How did you do that?' Ivan asks with disbelief.

'I think the reason why we were waiting here is because he doesn't want us to know,' Fedyor points out. Ivan glares at him.

'Can I see him?' you ask the man.

'He's asleep, but sure,' he answers and leads you inside. You follow him into the sleeping area. Aleksander is sleeping peacefully. You're not sure, but you think his scars are a bit less visible.

'Thank you,' you say, sitting by his side.

'You're not even sure if whatever I did worked,' the man scoffs. You smile slightly.

'You're Ilya Morozova, aren't you?' you ask. You're met with silence. You turn your head and see the man looking at you with shock.

'How?' he asks, his voice a whisper.

'I saw a glimpse of your handwriting in one of your notebooks,' you explain. 'And for the past weeks I've been studying your diaries in hopes of finding a cure for him. And… there was something familiar in you. I couldn't put a finger to it but now I know. Your eyes. He has the same eyes as you.'

Morozova looks at you in silence. You're wondering whether he considers killing you for discovering his secret. You wait patiently for his decision.

'How's Baghra?' he asks instead. This throws you off.

'She was fine last time I saw her,' you answer. 'She asked me to save her son. But I'm not sure if she survived the battle.'

'Oh, she did,' Morozova huffs. 'She's always been tough. She raised him to be the same. She made some mistakes. But so did I. And so did he. But you know what always brings members of our family back on track?'

You shake your head. Morozova steps closer to you and touches with his finger your chest on the left side.

'People important to us,' he explains. 'I saw how that boy looked at you. My daughter was right to ask you to save him. You're the only one who can do it.'

'You're the one who did,' you say, confused.

'I saved his body,' he agrees. 'But you're the only one who can save his soul. It's not too late for him. When he wakes up, tell him he either stops… or he will lose you. One way or another.'

'I can't leave him,' you say after a beat. Morozova smiles wryly and exits the room. You turn back to Aleksander. You watch him, pondering about his grandfather's words. Suddenly, Morozova returns.

'Come with me,' he says. Curious, you follow him. He takes you to the back of his house. You walk to one of the trees on the edge of the forest.

'Look up,' he says. You do as he says and are stunned.

'That's…' you say.

'Dying,' Morozova ends for you and you look at him with wide eyes. 'This firebird has days at most. I resurrected it years ago but now its time is truly done.'

'Resurrected?' you repeat slowly. Morozova looks at you.

'That's the fourth amplifier,' he says. 'And it can be yours.'

'I beg your pardon?' you say in a weak voice. 'I can't-'

'You won't be murdering it,' Morozova huffs. 'Look at it. It's dying already.'

He grabs your shoulders. You're now actually frightened.

'You followed my grandson to hell and back,' Morozova says. 'And you'd probably do it again. You proved you're willing to die for him. But are you ready to live for him?'

You stare at him. Your lower lip trembles.

'You're a very powerful Grisha,' Morozova says and you frown. 'I can feel it. In your bones and blood. You're destined for a long life. If you can make it. But with that amplifier? You can be by his side forever. I know he would want that.'

You freeze. Would he really?

'You don't have to kill it now,' Morozova says after a moment.

'Oh, thank Saints,' you say, relieved.

'Talk to him first,' Morozova goes one. 'Tell him he can have it. Do it for him. If he agrees to stop pursing his noble but mad goals. They only bring destruction… and can cause him death of his loved ones.'

You're stunned to see tears in his eyes. Your look softens. You touch his cheek. He winces but doesn't pull away.

'Thank you,' you say.

'Will you do it?' Morozova asks. You shrug.

'I don't know,' you answer honestly. 'But thanks to you, I have a new option now. A chance to be by his side.'

'Living forever is not easy,' Morozova warns you.

'It's better if you share it with someone you love,' you counter. He sighs and nods.

'Whatever you two will decide,' Morozova says, 'your love will prevail everything.'

'I know,' you say with a smile and look behind your shoulder at the hut. 'But are we both going to agree what's the best way to make sure of it?'

*

You're sitting by Aleksander's side, watching the sun setting outside of the window. Morozova's words play in your head. All this time you've tried not to think about the moment when your time would come. You've tried to focus on the present, on making sure Aleksander survives. He will, you know that, even his scars are almost gone. So… what now?

'You're really set on changing our tradition,' a familiar voice says. You flinch and look down. Aleksander is smiling at you.

'Our places switched,' he says. Your lips twitch upward.

'Looks like it,' you say. You reach for a glass of water. He sits down and you help him drink it.

'How are you feeling?' you ask when he's done.

'Better than I have had in weeks,' Aleksander answers and looks at you softly. 'Thank you. You saved me.'

'Seemed fair to return the favour,' you say. 'You do it all the time. And I love you, there's that as well. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you.'

'Your loyalty is truly extraordinary,' Aleksander says after a beat, looking on your hand that is resting on his. 'I'm grateful for it. But I hate myself how much it all have cost you.'

He looks away. You think carefully on your next words.

'Aleksander,' you finally say softly. 'Look at me.'

Kirigan turns his head. There's sadness and something else you can't quite place in his eyes.

'I will never regret loving you,' you say and he raises his eyebrows at you. 'Truly. You gave me something amazing. All the moments with you were beautiful. True, I've lost something and I was hurt many times. But it was all worth it. You were worth it.'

Aleksander smiles at you. He takes your hand in his and squeezes it. You squeeze back.

'Which is why I don't think we should return,' you say and feel Aleksander stiffen under your touch. 'I don't want them to kill you.'

'Every great thing demands taking a risk and sometimes even a sacrifice,' Kirigan says. 'But, I'm stronger now. They won't win this easily next time.'

'What if I'm the sacrifice?' you ask and Aleksander looks at you with a sharp look but you don't let him speak. 'I'm not immortal. I'm powerful and my life will be longer than most Grisha, but I'm not immortal. One day I will die. If we continue with fighting with them, it can be even shorter. And even if not, this war may never end and we'll spend our whole time together fighting. Do you really want that?'

Aleksander doesn't answer. He looks away. You can see the battle in his eyes. You let go of his hand.

'Think about it,' you say and stand up. 'I'll ask Ivan to bring you something to eat. You rest.'

You don't even give him a chance to reply. You leave the room, hoping that this time he'll choose you.

When you see him next time, you're sitting outside the hut, watching the stars. He joins you, apparently feeling much better.

'Nothing hurts,' he says before you can ask him about it. 'Everyone else has gone to sleep. Why didn't you?'

'I have too many thoughts in my head,' you answer. 'But you should rest.'

'I've slept enough,' Aleksander replies. 'Besides, I have too many thoughts in my head as well.'

You hum and nod. You watch the stars in silence for some time.

'What would I do?' Aleksander asks. 'One day I'm going to lose you anyway. If we walk away and have a peaceful life… what would I do when you're gone? Because I think I'd go mad.'

'And what would you do if we continue fighting and my time comes?' you ask quietly.

'I'd either continue to fight or try to preserve what we achieved,' Aleksander answers. 'Killing my enemies would definitely help me with my heartache. I don't know what could possibly help it if we choose a different path.'

'What if we had forever?' you ask hesitantly. 'If I was like you? Never aging, never dying? Would you choose me, then?'

Aleksander gives you a scolding look. Probably for the way you put it.

'If I could stay by your side forever…' he says, taking your hands in his, '… I'd take you to the far end of the world. To keep you safe from every suspicion and harm. To have a peaceful and happy life you deserve.'

You stare at him in silence. Your heart is beathing fast. Maybe…?

'Come with me,' you say after a moment, standing up and pulling him with you. You take him to the back of the house. You reach the tree line.

'Look up and tell me what you see,' you tell Aleksander. He frowns but does as you say.

'What is that?' he asks when he notices a firebird. 'Some bird?'

'A firebird,' you answer and Aleksander looks at you with wide eyes. 'Your grandfather made another amplifier. But it's dying.'

'If you were to k- let it out of its misery…' Kirigan says, getting excited.

'I could live as long as you,' you agree, nodding. 'At least according do your grandfather.'

Silence falls between you two. Aleksander takes your hand and gently traces line on it.

'I know you have a kind soul and killing such creature is not something you would normally do…' he says slowly, '… but it's going to die anyway, you said so.'

'Say I do it,' you say after a beat. 'What then?'

'We wait for me to get back to my full strength and-' Aleksander says.

'And?' you ask. He caresses your cheek.

'With your power amplified by such creature we would be unstoppable,' he says. 'But you're right. Your loyalty to me cost you already so much. I've lost you, I hurt you and… I want you to be happy.'

He hums, suddenly becoming pensive. You tilt your head, curious.

'Making sure Grisha are safe and have a good life used to be my priority,' he says and cups your face. 'But now… I just want you to keep smiling. Your happiness is my priority.'

You smile at him. He presses his forehead to yours.

'So… just say a word and we will leave,' he says. 'Leave all this mess, Ravka… hoping Alina and others actually can make something of it. And I'll take you to the end of the world, do what you did: throw everything for the one I love.'

You press your lips to his. You share a kiss, then you pull slightly away and whisper:

'Yes…'

*

Alina sighs and looks around the streets of a city of Novyi Zem. She liked this country when she was here with Mal, all those years ago. It still dazzles her. She smiles and turns around.

'Are you coming?' she asks. Her husband huffs but smiles.

'Yes, yes, oh great Ambassador of Ravka,' he says with mock seriousness. Alina rolls her eyes.

'Stop it,' she says. Mal reaches her and takes her hand in his. They start walking together.

'Where are we supposed to meet with the rest?' the tracker asks after a moment.

'The market,' Alina answers. 'We should be the first ones to arrive.'

And so a few or more minutes later, they arrive at the market. They both look around in amazement. Until Alina sees something that causes her to freeze.

'What is it?' Mal asks, noticing his wife's distress. He follows her gaze and is stunned as well.

A few metres from them there are you. You're buying something with a small smile on your face. The vendor is chatting with you with a grin, clearly acquittanced with you.

'Why is she here?' Mal asks quietly.

'And why now?' Alina ponders. She exhales slowly and makes up her mind. When you walk away from the vendor, she walks after you.

'[Y/N],' she calls quietly. You stop and stiffen. Slowly, you turn around with wide eyes.

'Alina,' you say and look behind her. 'Mal. Saints. It's been years.'

'It has,' the tracker says, standing next to Alina. Their fingers entwine. You can't help but smile.

'You're still together,' you say. 'I'm glad. Truly. And that you're well.'

'You seem to be well, too,' Alina says cautiously. You nod.

'I am,' you confirm. 'I've heard Ravka is doing well, too. Thanks to you and Nikolay.'

'We're trying,' Alina says.

'But it hasn't been easy, since we're always worried that the Darkling is going to suddenly show up and try to take it all away again,' Mal adds. His wife huffs and glares at him. You smile slightly.

'He won't,' you assure them. They look at you sceptically.

'[Y/N] [L/N],' you hear behind you. You turn and see Nikolay coming to you with Zoya, Tolya and Tamar. You bow your head to him.

'I'm glad to see you in good health,' he says.

'Thank you, I'm glad you're well, too,' you say. Nikolay nods to you and puts his hands behind his back.

'Are you going to tell me the news I've been waiting to hear for years?' he asks. Alina exhales slowly, trying to calm down. Why does she have to be surrounded by men with no empathy?

'I'm afraid not, Your Highness,' you say with that smile again. They all stiffen.

'He's alive?' Tamar asks gravely.

'How?' Mal asks, astonished. 'He was dying.'

'As if [Y/N] would allow him to just die,' a voice says. Fedyor and Ivan join your group. The latter is glaring at Nikolay and others.

'What, she just willed him to live?' Zoya scoffs.

'No, but she found a way,' Fedyor answers. 'You look lovely as ever, dear Zoya.'

'I know,' the Squaller says. The Heartrender chuckles. You turn to Nikolay.

'You don't have to worry,' you assure him. 'None of us intends to attack your country.'

'Forgive me that I won't take your word for it,' Nikolay says. You smile.

'I understand,' you say. 'I probably wouldn't in your place as well. But we like our quiet life here. He even admits from time to time you're doing a surprisingly good job with uniting Grisha and otkazat'sya. But he complains a lot, too.'

'And you're living happily and peacefully here?' Tamar asks.

'Maybe here, maybe somewhere else,' you say. 'But happily and peacefully, yes.'

'We don't wish you ill,' Ivan speaks up and looks at Alina. 'And you promised to let us go. So if you excuse us…'

'Of course,' Nikolay says. 'You're free to go. Just try not to plan another attack or something. Then our deal would be no longer valid.'

'Naturally,' you say and smile. 'Take care, Nikolay. I think you're doing a really good job. You're far better king than your father was. And your brother ever could be.'

'Thank you,' Nikolay says. 'And I'm sorry for the hurt they caused you.'

'Thank you,' you say quietly. You look at Alina and Mal. Before you can open your mouth, Alina pulls you in for a hug.

'I miss you,' she murmurs. 'But I'm glad you're okay. And happy.'

'I feel exactly the same,' you whisper and pull away. Mal hugs you briefly as well. You nod at others and leave with your Heartrenders.

'Do you think we can trust them?' Tolya asks, watching you.

'Hard to say,' Nikolay sighs. 'Alina?'

The Sun Summoner doesn't answer at once. She watches as you encounter surprised Genya and David. The Tailor quickly hugs all three of you. David is a bit more reserved. You say something to him, looking at him apologetically. He shakes his head and you smile.

'I want to trust her,' Alina finally says. 'But I don't know if-'

She cuts herself off, seeing now Baghra joining you. You smile softly and pull her aside. You talk quietly and she looks at you with shock. Alina can swear she sees tears in the old woman's eyes. She nods and says something to you.

You smile and turn to leave. But then Baghra grabs your left arm and turns it to look at your wrist. She looks you in the eyes, shocked. You calmly return her stare. She lets you go and you leave. A moment later Baghra, Genya and David join their friends.

'Did you see them?' the Tailor asks. Others nod.

'We've talked with them a moment before you,' Tamar answers. 'They claim they don't have any nefarious plans, but we're not sure we can trust them.'

'We can,' Baghra says, surprising everyone.

'How can you be sure?' Nikolay asks. Baghra smiles slightly.

'Because she saved him,' she answers. 'In more ways than you think.'

'What was that you saw on her wrist?' Zoya asks.

'The thing that makes me sure my son will always choose a peaceful way of life,' Baghra answers and walks to their next destination. Others exchange a confused look. Alina shrugs and follows the old woman. The rest does the same, not really having another choice.

*

You, Fedyor and Ivan reach your small hut at the edge of town. Outside Aleksander is sitting on a bench, busy with fixing a chair. He smiles when he notices your arrival.

'You can say it,' Ivan says. You sigh.

'What exactly?' Aleksander asks.

'You know what thing,' Fedyor explains, amused.

'Ah,' Aleksander says, understanding, and chuckles. He looks at you with raised eyebrows. You glare at him.

'I told you so,' he says anyway. You groan.

'Yes, you said we're going to meet with Alina and others since they're here and we did,' you admit, annoyed. 'Happy now?'

'Very,' Aleksander says, standing up to kiss your forehead. 'Did they give you any trouble?'

'No, but we had to tell them you're alive,' you answer. 'They asked about it and the twins were with them, so they would have told if I had lied.'

Aleksander nods, understanding. Ivan and Fedyor walk inside. Kirigan takes your hand in his.

'Your mother was there as well,' you say.

'What did you tell her?' Aleksander asks.

'That her father is still alive,' you answer. 'Well, he was when we met him. I passed her what he had asked me to tell her. That he regrets many things, one of them how things went with them. I also told her she's welcome to live with us if she wants.'

'And what did she say to that?' Aleksander asks, not sure what answer he wants to hear. You smile and peck his cheek.

'That she'll think about it,' you answer and walk inside. 'Oh, she also noticed my amplifier.'

Aleksander follows you inside. You wave your right wrist at him, where Morozova put a bone of the firebird.

'What did she say to that?' Kirigan asks, leaning on the doorframe. You pause.

You saved him…

'That it suits me,' you answer with a smile. You unpack groceries. After a moment you feel arms around your waist. You lean into Aleksander's chest, sighing softly.

'Were they worried?' Aleksander asks. You roll your eyes.

'Obviously,' you answer. 'But I think Baghra will convince them we're really no longer a threat to them. Nikolay also apologised. For what his father and brother did to me.'

'Noble of him,' Kirigan says.

'Actually, that reminded me,' you say. 'The way you told Genya to kill the king… Poison. It was deliberate, wasn't it?'

Aleksander is silent. You look at him. He reaches out and puts a strand of your hair behind your ear.

'He made you drink poison made for me, so I thought he should see what it's like,' he admits. 'Of course, it was a different type of poison, it got to his system by touching Genya, so it wouldn't be too suspicious, but that was enough for me.'

'You also decided on this because he suffered more and longer, right?' you guess.

'Maybe,' Aleksander says, grinning cheekily. You scoff and shake your head, but smile.

'And did it feel good?' Kirigan asks suddenly. 'To see your friends again?'

'Yes,' you confirm. 'I also made peace with Genya and David.'

Silence falls between you. Aleksander sighs.

'Maybe I should do it as well,' he says.

'It is a good opportunity,' you admit. Aleksander hums.

'Maybe tomorrow,' he decides. 'They will be in town for a few days, after all.'

'And what are you planning to do today?' you ask.

'Well, I thought about spending it with my wife,' Aleksander answers playfully. You smile. You think about the moment from few years ago.

You know, there one thing bad about us giving up.

And it is?

I screwed up. I can't marry you now.

Oh? And who said so?

… Will you really? Marry me, I mean?

Yes.

… Ivan! Where's the nearest chapel?!

'Sounds like a plan,' you say and turn around. 'But who will cook dinner?'

'Ivan and Fedyor will manage,' Aleksander answers and takes your hand. 'Now come.'

You chuckle and let him take you outside. He takes you to a meadow full of flowers. You see picnic blanket and basket. You smile.

'That looks nice,' you say.

'Of course, it does, I prepared it,' Aleksander says. You roll your eyes. You sit on a blanket and start your picnic. But you can tell Kirigan's mind is not really there.

'Hey,' you say, touching his hand. 'What's wrong?'

'Are you happy?' Aleksander asks, very serious. You give him a surprised look.

'Yes, very,' you answered. 'What brought this on?'

'I often think that you deserve a better life,' Aleksander admits. 'That you were meant for more. That if you hadn't had followed me, your life would be different. More respectful. I ruined your life.'

He looks at you with pain in his eyes. But he's surprised to see you looking at him calmly. You cup his face.

'And to this day, I feel nothing but love for you,' you say, stunning him. 'Yes, my life could have gone differently. But I don't want anything different. I have you. That's all I ever needed or wanted. No matter how hard it gets, all will be well. Because we're together. I look toward our future with a smile on my face.'

Aleksander chuckles. Pain in his eyes turns to relief.

'I feel exactly the same,' he says and touches your forehead with his. 'I'm happy. I really am. I can't remember the last time I was this happy before I met you.'

You smile at each other. You kiss. It becomes more heated.

'Tell me… have you ever had sex outdoors?' Aleksander murmurs. Your eyes light up.

'I can't tell I have,' you answer. Kirigan smirks at you and starts kissing your neck. Slowly, his kisses go lower and lower. You quickly undress each other. Aleksander lays you down on the blanket.

'Tell me what you want,' he says, his voice husky. You lift your head and join your lips.

'I want you,' you whisper. 'Only you.'

Aleksander smiles and touches your womanhood. You sigh softly when he starts touching it.

'You make such pretty noises for me,' he murmurs, putting a finger inside you. You want to retort but he finds just the spot to cause you to moan. He gives it more attention, but doesn't forget about your clit.

'Please,' you whisper. Aleksander massages and fingers you for a moment longer. Then, he kisses you. You sigh in his lips and moan when he enters you. Kirigan groans and starts moving in you.

'You always feel so good, [Y/N],' he says and speeds up. He presses kisses to your breasts. You gasp.

'More,' you moan. 'Please, Aleksander, more! Harder!'

'Your wish is my command, lapushka,' Aleksander says and kisses you. He hits you at the right spots with a perfect force.

'Aleksander!' you gasp. 'Aleksander!'

'[Y/N]…' Kirigan groans. 'My [Y/N]…'

'Yours…' you confirm, cupping his face and pressing kisses to it. 'Only yours.'

'And I'm yours,' Aleksander says, looking at you with love, lust and adoration. 'My little tide.'

You smile and then gasp when Kirigan speeds up even more. You both moan and groan for the next few minutes. Finally, he spills inside you and you come around him as well, both of you screaming each other's names. He falls on the blanket next to you and pulls you to himself.

'I love you, [Y/N],' Aleksander says. 'My heart beats for you.'

You smile and snuggle into him. He holds you tighter.

'And I love you, Aleksander,' you murmur. 'So much, my pretty boy.'

Kirigan grins. He kisses the top of your head.

'We're gonna be together forever, right?' you ask.

'Forever,' Aleksander confirms. 'And one day more.'

A/N: Thank you so much for giving this story a chance and reading it! It's the end of the story of General and his Tidemaker. I hope you liked it. Please, let me know what you think with comments, reblogs and likes. As to what's next, I have some ideas, but I'm not sure when I will post something new with this pair. But let me know if you prefer fics with more chapters, like "A Tale of Stolen Hearts" or fics with less chapters joined in a series, like this one. That's it from me! Take care and see you in the next fic!

This can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49965037/chapters/126897283

[autistic-crypt1d]

Stargate SG-1 Live Blogging:

Season 6

I'm sad but ok let's go

Seasons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Updates:

- Redemption: Part 1

- "I swear sir I thought they just wanted to smoke a peace pipe" BRUH XD

- not Jack trying to dodge the Russian General XD

- "over my rotting corpse, sir"

- Jonas is so adorable 😭

- HE'S SO FUNNY

- "I'll take anything over this" god I love Hammond

- I forgot she dies :(

- I honestly don't remember what happens in this episode regarding the gate, that's exciting

- I'm trying so hard to remember

- "why would he believe such a thing?" "because you are his father, and you have not told him otherwise" OOF

- his finger cross XD

- god I hate McKay in this show

- drama queen

- Redemption: Part 2

- the oops sorry nevermind bit was funny I'll admit

- damn it Rodney

- why don't they listen to Sam istg

- why does he have to ruin everything 😭

- she is an artist!!! She is such a beautifully inspiring artist that she fundamentally changed McKay's approach to science, to life

- I love Jonas and his little composition notebook

- this is so cool

- let's go Ryak!!!!

- HELL YEAH TEAM!!!!

- poor Jonas :(

- new ramp scene :(

- Descent

- ooooo if this is the one I think it is I'm very excited

- it is!!!!!

- always the rando scientist who doesn't listen and gets killed

- Davis is easily one of my favorite recurring side characters, love Davis episodes

- Jonas's gasp and Teal'c yanks him out of the way XD

- let's go Jonas!!!

- LET'S GO JONAS!!!!

- the greenscreen for Teal'c and Sam was so bad oml XD

- PFFFT Jack spinning Jonas, so cute

- Frozen

- this one already?? Neat!!

- omfg that's one of The Lone Gunman!!

- Jonas's facination with the weather forcast is so adorable

- this episode makes me really sad :(

- "more than that, we want you to live. I want you to live." "sorry" OW OW OW

- Nightwalkers

- another favorite!!!

- I love her telling Jonas and Teal'c to watch the other one XD girl is stressed out being on Earth with 2 aliens and no one to help watch them

- I love the random detail that Jonas I'd almost always snacking on something

- AHHH IT'S SO SPOOKY AND COOL I LOVE IT

- the tone shift when it gets dark is AWESOME

- I love that Teal'c was totally ready to beat TF outta those dudes

- I'm like 90% sure that the dude in the tan vest walking out of the diner was the director dude from Wormhole X-Treme

- ahhhhhh!!! The soundtrack as Carter realizes it's Goa'uld!!!

- I love Jonas and Sam so much, adorable duo

- Abyss

- ah man

- bro 2/3 of the Tok'ra blending experiences have been traumatizing af for these dudes. Jacob is literally the only one who had a good experience

- watching this episode and thinking about the fact that Jack has been a POW before is...

- "you're just gonna have to trust me" "I can do that" 😭

- Shadow Play

- the professor sounds so much like Jacob sometimes

- the whole thing with his professor is sad

- "you saved the world" 😭

- The Other Guys

- oh god

- "They're just tired of your butt snorkeling" BRUH

- poor Coombs XD

- "Jay, you just shot that guy. I mean, you really shit him" bro the way he says it is so funny

- their forehead "tattoos" are so bad oml XD

- "are you calling us fruit?"

- "you ended that sentence with a preposition. You bastard." PFFFFT

- Jonas looked like such a dork jumping out of that bush I love it

- HELL YEAH TEAL"C

- Jack is such a fucking dork I love him

- ugh

- Allegiance

- is this the supersoldier episode?????

- probably not i think that cimes later but one can hope

- wait is it??

- it is!!!!

- I don't get why Jonas was left out of this episode

- poor Jack, the tensions are HIGH

- ahhhh I'm so excited!!

- omfg the "EVERYBODY DOWN" scene!!!! Ahhhh!!!

- oh, it isn't the supersoldier storyline???? Why do I remember this as being a supersoldier????

- damn, still a fantastic episode though

- "by the hand of our common enemy, it has made us brothers." AHHHH!!!

- Cure

- tretonin time!!!! (I think?)

- yesssss

- ok here's something I don't understand, how tf does THAT go inside the lady Tok'ra eventually, that thing is huge!!!

- isn't the archeology woman played by thrle same woman who plays the doctor on Hoff that Beckett falls for?

- she isssss

- Jonas and this archeologist woman are the only cute alien/sg-1 pairing I've seen imo

- ooooh I looked it up, the queen detaches from the birthing sac in order to go inside a host

- Egeria's death is so sad 😭

- Prometheus

- oh this one!

- honestly I don't really care for this one

- KICK THEIR ASSES SAM!!!

- LET'S GO SAM!!!

- bro everytime the Asgard show up when SG-1 happens to need help it's this exact interaction "Oh thank god you're here to help!" "Actually, we need your help"

- Unnatural Selection

- Thor just completely commedeering the ship and everything in the SGC is so funny

- "we can only hope this will be the last footwear to fall" PFFFFT

- TEAL'C PEAKING AROUND THE CORNER XD

- I gotta say, I really wish they did human form replicators differently, at least for the milkway ones. Going from bug to perfect humanoid is so lame to me. I know that they had hundreds of years to evolve to that but it just took so much fear factor away from them imo. I wish we got horrifying mechanical amalgamation attempts at humanity

- 5 being left behind is really sad I will say that

- Sight Unseen

- BRUH they really used the same prop for this as the thing that held the giant dark cloud thing in SGA season 1

- poor Jonas

- Sam and Jonas are so silly and adorable I love them

- Smoke and Mirrors

- honestly I remember basically nothing from this episode

- oooooh the assassin used the mimetic alien tech I think

- I love Teal'c clotheslining people, so good

- YO THAT'S BRODY FROM SGU

- yuck

- ugh, hate kinsey

- Paradise Lost

- omg this one XD

- "nothing I love more than a good weiner" "well ya know what they say, you are what you eat" BRUH THESE TWO

- oh wow yeah I guess it is the furlings

- maybourne throwing the fish at him is so funny

- ow the locker room scene 😭

- poor Jack :(

- Metamorphosis

- they're so sibling coded I love them

- jeez I forgot how bad his death was

- this episode is really sad :(

- I really hate Nirrti, but her outfit in this episode is awesome

- another Sam/Jack episode!

- when the camera was on Sam and the Russian guy started coughing I immediately got a flashback to the Jolinars memory episodes with her dad

- :(

- ew I hate the Nirrti/Jonas shit in this episode

- Disclosure

- this is the one where thor shows up right?

- I kinda love this episode, watching poor Davis try to explain this shit is so funny

- "supreme commander Thor" I love him so much

- Forsaken

- oooo celtic influence that's cool

- hate these guys

- sucks that this whole thing goes to hell because the bad guys are human looking and the good guys are alien looking

- I also very very deeply hate this man flirting with Sam

- hate this girl for trying to mess with Jonas like this

- hell yeah Jonas

- The Changeling

- ah man this is the weird Teal'c one isn't it

- I really don't like the majority of this episode tbh

- Daniel!!!

- ow, the scene with him collapsing on the gateroom floor 😭

- OW, him and Bra'tac alone on the battlefield 😭

- Teal'c on the ramp finally awake 😭

- LET'S GO JACOB!!!

- I forgot Teal'c loses his symbiote this early

- Daniel visiting him 😭

- stop I'm gonna cry he misses him so much 😭

- Memento

- I remember nothing of this episode atm

- is this the gas cloud one?

- oooooh no it's this one

- this ship had rings????

- ugh, so much dick measuring in this episode 🙄

- I love that Teal'c sleeve are cut off, those biceps cannot be contained

- Jack doing the little glass bonk omfg

- leader guy is awesome

- that Stargate raising scene!!!! AHHHH!!!!

- Prophecy

- oh it's the prophetic Jonas episode! I remember almost nothing from this atm

- it's really refreshing to see people fighting back like this, taking initiative

- poor Jonas 😭

- HELL YEAH GIRL!!

- "we need you out there" AHHH BONDINGGGG

- Full Circle

- oh no

- "I swear that was an Aspirin I took this morning"

- I love them finding a way to argue even though one of them is literally dead

- the quiet little "Daniel told me" is so funny

- and everyone believes him XD

- why does Anubis have to have such a cool ship 😭

- Skaara putting Jack and Sam on the spot XD

- "is he not powerful?" "That remains unclear" ROASTED

- fantastic episode I am very excited

- LET'S GO TEAL'C

- "is that my stuff?" "You weren't using it anymore" XD

- oooo this is where they figure out that the Ascended beings are the Ancients!

- "is it really necessary to further antagonize him?" "Yes" might as well at this point tbh

- Skaara :(

- I'm sorry all I can notice is that the Anubis actor clearly misjudged where the throne was and was barely sitting on it XD you can literally see him hold onto the underside of the throne arm to keep from falling off

- Daniel really screws this one up :/

- "well spank me rosy" XD

- damn it Daniel, you should know better by now :/

- :(

Season 7

[shyhunnyb]

I took yesterday slow and steady. I just keep having to remind myself to keep moving forward (thank you, Meet the Robinsons). I felt physically and emotionally drained yesterday to the point I fell asleep before 8pm.

I'll be getting a roommate soon, I need to save some money, and they need a place to stay. I won't be able to touch myself the way I want to (all over the house). I'll have to be more careful in general about kink/sex things. I've been clearing out my craft room/spare room. Trying to condense all my nonsense has proven to be exhausting and has allowed me to get rid of things I've had for years.

The apartment is so empty without his stuff. I miss him so much sometimes, and then I remember how unhappy we both were at the end. He says he wasn't unhappy with me, just himself, but that's not how he treated me. I've really been reflecting on my relationship with him for the past few weeks. I know I wasn't perfect, and maybe I did pull away more at the end and shut down. I was tired of begging for love and affection. Even comfort was denied to me... I would beg for his time or more affection, and he only claimed I was smothering him. I supported him in every venture he pursued, but yet nobody has ever been there for him or is in his corner.

Every time I think of him, I'm incredibly sad that the future we talked about over and over the first couple of years will never happen. Even if I felt the same about him now, and I don't, we wouldn't have the same future. Not with the way the US is headed, not with everything that happened with us. He said he was going to change, and in a year, I haven't seen any real change or effort. Just more of his despise and contempt for me, he constantly tells me my love wasn't real and it was all just a game. I planned on getting rid of him and moving on with my life because he couldn't "give me anything." That I've moved on to fuck other people and I've replaced him with someone else in our bed. Then, he changes his mind a few days later and wants me back and to "forget all that stuff." He will message me paragraphs of how he feels and that he wants me back. When I don't know how to respond because I'm overwhelmed, then I'm awful and don't care about him. I should just tell him to fuck off and that I'm avoiding him.

All of this is so exhausting on top of trying to take care of 4 cats (1 of them is technically his), work 2 jobs and figure out how to pay all my bills with my 2 jobs because it simply isn't enough. I had to get the second job because he wasn't working. That was fine, but it was only supposed to be for a couple of months... fast forward to a couple years and I'm so burned out that it's not even funny anymore.

I was never mad at him for not working, I know why he wasn't, while everyone can have their opinion, it was for a valid reason. I was mad at him for yelling at me and calling me names when he was mad. I was mad at him for giving up, he stopped interacting with me, I would beg him to play games with me or go places. He flat out refused to do anything. He stopped cleaning and helping me with the house while I juggled the two jobs. The only thing he didn't neglect were the cats. He made sure they were fed often and played with them.

It's been a while since I've known it'll never be the same. That we have to go no contact because we aren't good for each other, I thought we were and we could help each other grow. But maybe I'm not good for anyone, and I was the cause of the demise of my relationship. Maybe I did smother him. My emotional problems just furthered the issues we had that started small and ended big. I've been in and out of therapy for years and know i need to go back gain. I try so hard not to put my emotions on other people. It's why I have a bunch of notebooks filled with my writing, why I post long texts like this.. to help navigate through how I'm feeling without putting it on someone else. It hurts so much to let go of what was and what could have been. But I can't live like I'm constantly begging for my partner to love me or to love themselves enough to get the help they need.

Just keep moving forward.

[granulesofsand]

Hello

We have been wondering, how does one look into RAMCOA and programming safely? We hear a lot about making sure you are careful when doing this, and having safety nets in place, but we are not quite sure what that looks like. Would you be willing to give some examples of how that would play out, with one having or putting safety measures in place? Or what kinds of things would be considered a safety net? I hope this makes sense

Safety Nets

I’m sorry if this is aggressive, it has nothing to do with you or your questions, just my general attitude.

🗝️🏷️ RAMCOA, programs, sui/sh

One of the strongest indicators of whether a event will be (re)traumatizing is connection. It has to do with feeling recognized and being able to process what happened. Dissociated memories intrude because they haven’t been processed.

Having supportive people means getting the attunement we need to avoid shame and confront the overwhelm.

Supportive people can be therapists, counselors, or consenting friends. You need to build trust before disclosure feels okay, but you will have to disclose some things. One person can’t handle everything, a network with people can.

Survivors of RAMCOA are likely to be destabilized be consuming information. Programmed survivors may deal with suicide and self-harm, reporting back to abusers, or the emergence of unknown alters. All of this is backed by trauma, and moving through it requires either processing or putting away.

When you need someone to keep your knives away from you, or prevent you from driving back to your hometown, or sit with you through some flashbacks and big emotions, you have to be able to communicate what’s happening and how to help.

Other non-people tools are comfort items or grounding exercises. Brains reallocate resources when they sense danger, so thinking logically becomes harder. Having bins of safe objects or a notebook with safe contacts and worksheets is easier than having to figure that out in the moment.

You might have techniques you know are helpful, but sometimes even trying those is too much. Practice makes for better recall once you’re in survival mode. In systems, every member might have to go through that process of finding useful information and doing it enough to make it automatic.

Other things might be more practical, like money saved up for bad times or easy meals when you can’t get out of bed.

Our Example

When we had our first undeniable memories, we had a therapist who would listen. They acknowledged that they didn’t know how to tend to us, so they referred us to another therapist who specialized in what we needed.

We had a school counselor who was not great, but kept us from having to us up therapy time for academic concerns. At our next meeting for accommodations, we added some things to let us turn in work later and walk out of class when we had to. Those transferred easier when we started college.

We had been hospitalized before for suicide attempts, so we already had a set locked place for dangerous materials.

It still hit hard. Hits hard, you’re only done once you’ve healed everything. We have a meal plan with our dorm, so on days we can go out we bring food back and refrigerate it. We have a friend who we talk to regularly, and we’re learning how to make more.

When you have supports together, the devastation is less final. You can get back up, make some progress with old trauma, keep going with daily life. Sometimes you have to make some lifestyle changes.

Decisions

It’s a can of worms hardly anyone is ready to open. You look into it because you need resources, and you only find out if there are consequences after the fact. Having preparation keeps you alive. I don’t know if anything keeps you stable.

It’s a matter of risk vs reward, because if you do have that history it doesn’t disappear by burying it. You have the opportunity to decide how to pad that landing, but you’re still flying blind.

Idk how to make this softer. It does get better, apparently. There are people who did this before we were ever hurt, and some of them healed with next to nothing. It’s possible, you just have to do your best to keep moving once you’ve begun.

Good luck if you choose this. Prepare anyway, you might not have the choice.

[tala-bez-i]

At first sight II Chapter Twenty-One

(m!reader x Bonten!Haruchiyo Sanzu)

Fluff/slash/reader is male/cursing/BontenTimeline/drugs and alcohol mentioned/violence/blood/death

All characters that appeared in the Tokyo Revengers manga and anime belong to Ken Wakui.

Words: 4124

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You sat at the table, repeating in your head everything you knew about Junko Yoshioka’s Blossom. It all still looked and sounded like a scenario from one of those twisted yaoi mangas that tempted you from the shelves in various stores selling such things.

Maybe if you were a teenager living in the current times, you would buy them like crazy until your own mother would give you a hard time about the shrinking living space, but no. You were a grown man, already approaching thirty, and your poor brain was not necessarily able to register all of it, process it, and spit out feedback containing a simplified description of the whole situation.

"What don't you understand?" The dark-haired woman who sat across from you and worked on her notebook asked calmly.

"Please don't get upset." You answered her, stroking the rim of your cup, in which you still had your cappuccino. "It's just that this is all so absurd that I need more time to be able to understand it. I thought things like this only happened in... What's it called? Fanfiction?"

Tomoko let out a short, quiet laugh and tore her eyes away from the screen for a moment to look at you.

"I had the same thing two days before we took over the boy from them." She answered you and went back to her work. Her fingers moved efficiently and quickly over the keyboard, causing a pleasant, quiet clicking of the keys. "The boy didn't have an easy life, and it won't get any easier now. He's currently in a safe facility for young people from, let's call it, difficult families." You watched every slight change in her facial expression and had to admit that your sister really didn't look her age. She looked a few years younger than she actually was. "We generally suspect that the youngster may have a lot of knowledge about various things that interest us, and that could mean that..."

“He’s up for questioning.” You finished for her and took a sip of your coffee.

“Yeah.” Tomoko looked up at you again. “I think he knows more about Takenaka.”

“If so, he’ll need protection. You know Nagasawa’s dead?”

The woman's fingers froze over the keyboard and that glint appeared in your sister's eyes, suggesting attention and increased focus.

"When did this happen and under what circumstances?" Tomoko's tone of voice suggested that she was in cop mode, so you lowered your voice, just to be safe, so the information wouldn't reach the wrong ears.

“Yesterday morning. They found him hanging from his own bedsheet.”

“How do you know that?”

“I went to the facility with Okumura today to talk to him again. The guard was confused by the whole situation.”

"Why?"

“Two hours before we got there, we got permission to re-interview him from the prosecutor, who had supposedly been briefed on the situation the day before.”

Tomoko closed her notebook and leaned forward. “The guy’s name.”

“I think you know who I’m talking about, Tomoko.” You replied, not wanting to risk saying his name out loud.

Your sister’s dark eyes scanned your face carefully and slowly, as if searching for the slightest sign of a lie, but when she looked into your eyes, you knew she knew who you meant.

“He has too many connections.” She said quietly, and you knew perfectly well that she was referring to Bonten.

“I wonder if they know anything.”

“About his interest in the brothel, yes.” She told you calmly. “But about him having a conflict with Takenaka, I don’t think so. I can’t vouch for that.”

“They didn’t mention anything?”

“No.” She sighed quietly and looked towards the cafe’s window. “It would be best if you tried asking them yourself. You have a deal with them, and as long as you’re working on solving the Takenaka case, they’ll be able to give you some information. You just have to ask them. They won’t hand you anything on a silver platter.”

“I know, I know…” You frowned slightly. “The question is, who should I go to first?”

“I would say Sanzu, since he’s number 2, but it would be better if you tried contacting Kakucho. Out of the two of them, he’s the more sensible one.”

“And Mochizuki?”

"He won't have time for you. Why did he come to your mind?"

“Because last time he was the one who contacted me.” Tomoko looked at you in surprise, waiting for further explanation. "They were going to do something that would make my and Okumura's colleagues' work harder, so we could go back to this case."

"And what?"

"He said it was all sorted. Later it turned out that the daughter of one of those detectives was kidnapped..."

"Yeah, yeah... We're working on it." Tomoko nodded, but the corners of her mouth turned up slightly.

"Okumura heard a rumor that Bonten had nothing to do with it." You added, feeling that the matter had a deeper meaning.

“Oh, they do and they don’t.” The woman’s smile grew significantly, sending a shiver down your spine.

“Can you tell me more?”

“Absolutely not.” She made a serious face, though there was still amusement in her eyes. “As I mentioned, we’re working on the case.”

"Tomoko, please. I won't interfere."

The woman sighed quietly, but a smile appeared on her lips again.

"The girl is with someone in the syndicate, that's true. What's not true is that she was kidnapped. Let's say she got invited to the party of her life and decided it would be a sin to refuse." She lifted her cup to her lips and took a sip of black coffee. “She's in no danger until she starts freaking out about something. Let's just say that the young lady isn't necessarily a good girl and loves to raise her old man's blood pressure."

"Something, like you?" escaped your lips and the woman regarded you with a slightly colder gaze.

"The pot calling the kettle black." She mumbled and you gently bit the inside of your cheek. "Stop doing that." She nudged your ankle with her booted foot. Your dentist must think you have mental problems, seeing all these scars.”

You shrugged, dropping your gaze to the cup you were holding in both hands. Your mother always scolded your father for this habit too. Gently and politely, but still.

„Tomoko…”

„Hmm?”

“Have you ever heard of Haji?”

“The one from Nagasawa’s brothel? No. I only know about him from what Wada and Riku told me.” Your sister replied, turning her gaze back to the window. “He’s quite polite towards customers, but from what I’ve gathered, he’s set to take over Nagasawa and Takenaka’s entire business.”

"Nothing stands in his way now. The owners are dead..."

"He still has to convince the bosses. Taking over a gang business isn't as easy as it seems, brother. If someone discovers in advance any connection between the guy and the deaths of the previous owners of a brothel, nightclub or other place run by trusted people of the syndicate, he himself will end up much worse than he would like."

“He needs to have someone to protect him.” You said and looked at Tomoko. “Like Uncle Shou.”

“Like Uncle Shou.” The woman repeated with a nod. “I won’t deny it. The guy has some pretty solid connections with Bonten. I think you’ve connected the dots by now, right?”

“Yeah. Okumura and I figured it out.”

“Excellent. Did you report it further?”

“We don’t have any solid evidence.” Other than the tapes…

“Okay. You have to catch him red-handed somehow. You have to have tapes of him confessing. Fuck, any connection to these cases.”

“To Takenaka and Nagasawa.” You said, just to make sure, and the woman held up a single finger.

"And Riku. Remember, Blossom is still Uncle Shou's favorite."

Fuck. You forgot about him.

You pressed your lips into a thin line and nodded. "When can we talk to him about this?"

"I have no idea. Find clues with Okumura that Riku is involved and you'll get permission to interrogate the boy." Tomoko said, finishing her coffee.

You watched as she put her notebook in her purse and quickly finished your cappuccino.

“Just one more question, Ko-chan.” Your sister looked at you, slightly surprised. “Can you think of anything why I should be careful with Sanzu now?”

Tomoko ran a hand through her tied-up dark hair and raised an eyebrow.

“All I know is that he’s planning some big surprise.”

“What do you mean?”

“I have no idea, Y/n. It's a surprise.” She started to leave the cafe and, passing the counter where the barista was standing, added. “The gentleman's coffee is on me.”

“I'll pay for myself!” You followed her, but your sister disappeared through the door, and the woman who worked for you in another reality smiled apologetically.

“Too late. When Mrs. L/n gives an order like that, you have to listen.” She said calmly and pointed to a piece of paper with empty spaces for stickers. “I can recommend our regular promotion for that. Mrs. L/n doesn't collect stickers, but you can give her a small gift.”

You looked at the small colorful piece of paper and felt your ears start to get warm.

"But wouldn't that mean she made the gift herself?" You asked quietly, feeling embarrassed.

The woman laughed quietly. "Yes, that's true, but..." She turned the coupon over. "This time, our promotion is combined with this one." You looked at a series of discount codes for various products from a drugstore that Tomoko liked to shop at. "All we have to do is secretly refill the stickers and..."

“That’s very kind of you, but I have to decline.” You interrupted her. “If my sister doesn’t want something, it’s best not to force it on her.”

You said goodbye to the petite woman and left the café. You stood on the sidewalk for a moment, looking first to the right, then to the left, and headed back to the police station, wondering if Okumura had managed to get anything done.

You were halfway there when a car pulled up next to you and the window was rolled down.

“Get in, L/n.” You heard your partner’s voice and did as you were told. “You were right. The old man said that Kitagawa made a simple mistake by giving us permission to talk to Nagasawa.”

You fastened your seatbelt, listening to what the man had to say.

"He said he would try to sort it out with him today and that we shouldn't worry about it. The prosecutor has had a lot of open cases on his plate for some time now and he had the right to make a mistake."

"Tomoko suggested trying to contact someone from Bonten HQ to explain his connection to what happened to Takenaka."

"And who's supposed to do that? L/n, she's the one who does that, not us. We don't have any other contacts with the syndicate like her, Wada, Riku, and the older Takenaka." Shinji answered you, pulling into the traffic that had decreased at the moment. "If she doesn't give us anything, then we can cross the rest out, at least for now. Wada gave us the footage from the brothel's cameras, Takenaka confirmed some information, and we don't currently have access to the young one."

“Until we get something that clearly indicates that he has more knowledge about Jun’s business with Uncle Shou… Or their conflict in general, we won’t be allowed to talk to the boy.”

“Are you kidding?” Okumura gave you a quick look. “I thought that just being interested would be enough. Besides, if we don’t ask him the right questions, we might not find out what the boy knows and what he doesn’t.”

“True, but you know who all this can bring down and unless we actually get something in a roundabout way…” You shrugged. "No questioning."

The dark-haired detective cursed under his breath and there was silence for a moment.

"Where are we going?" You asked when you noticed the familiar buildings and despite the fact that you had only been there once, you started to guess where you were going.

"Someone left us information about who Haji was doing business with behind Nagasawa's back." He answered you in a rather light tone and you looked at him with interest.

"Pink Cloud Host Club?"

"Uh-huh." The man confirmed and you felt a pleasant shiver of excitement run down your spine. "We got a tip that the owner, Kanata Nishitani, is currently there and this is our chance to have some kind of conversation with him."

"I suspect his wife would be more willing to talk." You said trying to sound calm but feeling excited just thinking about Rosie, it wasn't easy.

"Hmm, tell me, L/n. Was that the first time you saw her?" Okumura asked carefully, and for a split second you held your breath. "Not that it was anything, but you were acting pretty weird back then. It was the first time you pulled such a stunt, like from a romantic series..."

"Yeah, the first time." You interrupted him, feeling the irritation rising inside you. "Let's not go back to this topic, please. Let's focus on what needs to be done, okay?"

"Sure, no problem." He said, lightly lifting his fingers from the steering wheel, then added. "Do you think her husband makes her serve some customers? She only mentioned helping run the club, but..."

"What does that have to do with anything?" You asked, looking at the man carefully. "We received information about Haji's alleged cooperation with, I assume, Nishitani. The woman doesn't need to know about it. Yes, she did mention helping her husband, but she can only deal with the girls they employ."

“Right.” Okumura parked in the same parking spot as last time and you had to walk the rest of the way.

The temperature didn’t seem to be any lower than before, and the groups of people passing by, most of whom were very cheerful, gave you a false sense of extra warmth. You frowned slightly, having the impression that Kabukicho was a bit more crowded than last time.

This caused memories from your youth, when the area wasn’t as colorful as it was now, to briefly flash through your mind.

"Hey, L/n..." One of your companions pulled you closer with his arm. "If you rob that businessman over there..." He pointed to some guy who seemed to be intoxicated. He was leaning his hand against the wall of a building, and on either side of him two laughing prostitutes were talking to him. "I'll buy you a round at the brothel."

"Come on..." Your second companion spoke up, pulling the first one away. "He's a waste of whores. You see what a weakling he is. If he can't get himself a pussy, don't waste your money on him."

It wasn't very nice, but by then you were used to this type of teasing from your Valhalla colleagues. You didn't even pay much attention to it.

"L/n." You heard Okumura's voice next to you, and it was only then that you realized that you were standing in front of the illuminated window of the host club, staring at the photo of the guy you helped in the park not so long ago. Under his photo was a large sign announcing that he was temporarily unavailable in the club's offer. Like a note apologizing in a store for the lack of a certain product."

"I'm coming, I'm coming. Sorry." You answered him and stood next to him as close as the narrow entrance to the building would allow.

The man pressed the videophone button and almost immediately a small light came on, signaling that the camera was on.

"How can we help?" A male voice came through the speaker, the sound of which froze you for a moment. "The club opens in less than an hour..."

"Mr. Nishitani?"

"Yes. What is it?"

"I'm Detective Okumura and this is Detective L/n. We wanted to talk, if it's not too much trouble." Your partner explained.

You knew that voice. You had heard it before, more than once, but you couldn't place it with any face. You didn't know any Nishitani, not in this reality or the previous one, but a huge red flag started to grow in your head.

"Ah, my wife mentioned that you were here. Of course, please come in." The owner of the host club said, and a soft sound was heard, signaling the release of the door lock.

You followed Okumura inside and in the lobby you were greeted by one of the girls who was an employee of the host club and after greeting you politely, she showed you the way to the owner's office, which you had already been to once.

As soon as you entered the room, you were greeted from behind the desk by a man you recognized immediately. Hideki Nagano. Sitting in front of you was fucking Hideki Nagano.

The name Uchiyama immediately popped into your head, and in your mind's eye you saw Emiko's face. Your memories from before the time-leaps appeared one after another, even touching on your son, whom you will never have...

"My partner and I have a few questions and we would appreciate it if you would agree to cooperate with us." Shinji's words tore you from your thoughts and you began to look closely at the man sitting there.

In this reality, his hair was neatly trimmed and you could bet a small amount of money that his wife, Rosie, was responsible for it. If indeed the woman was his wife of her own free will.

“About Onikawa, right?” He leaned back in his chair, his eyes flicking from your partner to you. “What else do you want to know? Rosie gave you all the information, and so did Onikawa. I have nothing more to add.”

“We understand, and please don't worry, we're not here in this case.”

“Oh?” The man whose nose you would have loved to bust tilted his head slightly to the side.

"Can you tell us anything about the man who goes by the name Haji?" Okumura said and you didn't miss the subtle change in the club owner's face, suggesting some concern.

"Excuse me, who?" He asked with a slight smile.

"Haji. He works at the sex house owned by Jin Nagasawa and Junko Yoshioka." You said, trying to keep your voice calm and professional.

"I recognize Nagasawa and Takenaka, but this is the first I've heard of someone named Haji." Nishitani shrugged, trying to look relaxed again. "Maybe you should talk to the owners of other brothels?"

"Are you suggesting anyone in particular?" Okumura asked, pulling out his small notebook.

"Hachirou Kuroda." He said, pouting out his lower lip slightly. His tone sounded so nonchalant that it didn't match his suddenly harder gaze. The combination intrigued you greatly.

"Kuroda? Who is he?" Okumura asked, and your interlocutor licked his lips.

"The owner of the brothel two blocks away. He owns the entire building, so his girls don't have to leave their workplace." He began to explain, and you could clearly hear the irritation in his voice. “The guy exploits girls and women without caring about anything.”

Because you happen to be interested in anything more than profit. - You thought, but a small voice in your head told you that despite a certain amount of insincerity on his part, this time there might actually be something to it. And that was hard for you to accept.

"Uh-huh, so Kuroda might know more about Haji, right?"

You looked at Shinji and saw some tension on his face. Had he heard about the guy before?

"I heard things have changed in the Nagasawa brothel." Nishitani announced, getting up from his chair. His hands began to pick up his phone and cigarette case from the desk, which he calmly put into the pockets of his clean, evenly ironed pants. "Girls like to gossip, do you know, gentlemen detectives? It doesn't matter what brothel they're from, they like to spread gossip among themselves. Mainly to damage the competition, but there are also some who shit in their own nest." He looked from your partner to you, and this time his eyes met yours. "You know what I mean. Not every pimp tolerates such behavior in his host club, brothel, house of pleasure. Call it whatever you want. Some like it when girls compete with each other for a client, but when knives or scissors are used and the value of one of the whores drops..." He smiled crookedly. "That's not tolerated here, and my sweet wife keeps order. Fuck, I'm glad I found her. A woman with a heart of gold."

“Which building is this?” Okumura asked and the man gave the address from memory, not once stuttering, which piqued both your interest and distrust.

“Thank you for your help and if you hear any rumors about Haji, please contact us.” Shinji put his notebook in the pocket of his coat and you and the man left the room that served as the owner's office.

"Of course, Detective Okumura. I'll let you know as soon as I hear anything." Nishitani announced as you walked down the short hallway towards the front door.

A few girls passed you on the way, rushing to finish getting ready for their work, and for a split second you thought you saw Rosie herself in one of the rooms you passed, helping some girl with her hair.

"In case you gentlemen are looking for some nice company..." The owner of the Pink Cloud began and smiled seeing the significant look from the black-haired detective. "Of course, gentlemen. I am absolutely not encouraging you to do anything. Have a nice evening."

"We didn't even think about it." You said and as soon as you stood on the already quite crowded sidewalk again, the building doors closed behind you with a quiet click.

"God." Shinji sighed, pulling out a pack of cigarettes. "Let this end, because as patient as my Princess is, her hormones are starting to get the better of her more and more often."

"Oh?"

The man took a deep drag on his cigarette, exhaled smoke, and leaned toward you, inhaling deeply through his nose.

You looked at him, completely surprised, not fully understanding what he was doing.

“Yes, if I can smell it from you, then she can smell it from me too.” He grumbled, heading in the direction where you left the car. "Last time I saw her sniffing the collar of my shirts for two nights in a row, searching for the scent of a woman's perfume. I didn't say anything to that, and she doesn't say anything either, knowing full well what case we're working on, but..." Okumura shook his head. "She knows what I'm capable of, and even though I've been refraining from using the services of girls for a long time now, Mimiko is increasingly worried that I'll cheat on her."

“She's understanding…” You started truthfully, but as soon as your friend looked at you from the corner of his eye, you nodded. “I know what you’re talking about, Okumura. Mimiko is a good woman and she understands your job. She knows what you’ve done before, but you gave her your word that you wouldn’t do it again, and believe me or not, she trusts you. The fact that she’s checking your shirts… I think it’s just a reflex.”

“A reflex?” The detective snorted, taking an even deeper drag on his cigarette. “What fucking reflex?”

You sighed and gently bit the inside of your cheek.

"Listen. We have to visit brothels, saturated with women's perfumes and sometimes other scents. You spend relatively less time at home than before and for several months there has been no intimacy between you and your wife..." You looked at him uncertainly. "Right? Or... Or maybe something happened?"

"With two kids who won't leave my side when I come home? Fuck, L/n..." He sighed, but the corners of his mouth turned up slightly. "I know what you're getting at. You're a good friend, L/n. Thanks."

"You're welcome. Maybe try spending more time with Mimiko in the near future?" You raised one hand, seeing his expression that suggested an upcoming protest. "The only thing we can do now is check Kuroda. If he doesn't contribute anything, there's no point in hanging around brothels. In the meantime, we might as well work from our homes."

"Ah, fuck. Working from home with my two rascals." Okumura grumbled quietly. "I wouldn't dream of anything else..."

<PREVIOUS/NEXT>

[shojo]

Wish Review/Thoughts/Stuff

Not a formal review, just some bullet points of my thoughts on Disney's Wish. Letsa go.

***SPOILERS BELOW SO, YA KNOW, BEWARE***

So. I liked it. It was sweet, gorgeous to look at, and a simple fairytale. But I think that's the movie's biggest weakness because

There are no consequences. Just like Frozen, Raya, Frozen II, etc. the heroes go on this big quest and the stakes are freaking high like oh shit are they actually gonna go there an- Oh. Wait. Nope. Everything and everyone is fine and there's a happy ending and the movie's order and nothing was lost and will never be lost the end. When Magnifico crushed Asha's mother's wish I thought for a second that he killed her. Straight up. But then no she's just... really sad. And that sucks but she's fine. And those other three citizens are fine. Their dreams are literally crushed but, yeah, they're fine. Simon betrays Asha. He says sorry. They're friends again. They're all fine. Magnifico body slams a 17 year old girl into the stone floor more than once. She's fine. Whatever evil that has taken hold of Magnifico is just.. defeated. That's fine. This is fine. Everything's fine. Which brings me to my next critique that there is

So much set up and little to no pay off. What was the deal with the burned ends of the tapestry? What terrible fate was Magnifico trying to avoid? What's the deal with the evil book? Why did it have it? Does it have something to do with the story in the tapestry? Why did they mention Asha's grandfather's age multiple times (did you know he's turning 100 years old and can still ride a horse and play the guitar) and then do nothing with that information? Were they hinting at grandpa not living to get to see his wish granted? Was Asha trying desperately to get his wish granted because she knew he wouldn't have too much longer to live? What's the typical life span of a citizen of Rosas? Is 100 the new 40? Why was Magnifico so suspicious of granting grandpa's gift of playing music? Does this have to do with the story of the tapestry?? Why does Dahlia have a cane? Is she injured or is it a disability? Why are we trying to represent a person with a disability and then never mentioning it throughout the entire run time of the movie? Does her wish have anything to do with why she has a cane? Does her wish involve making the best damn cookies this kingdom has ever seen because to hell with her disability because she's got kickass friends who love her for her and don't want/need her to change but will the movie ever address this? If Dahlia knows about the inner workings of the castle does she know about the story in the tapestry??? What happened to Asha's dad? Why don't we get to see him, not even in a flashback? Why couldn't he have been the stand-in for Walt himself? Was Asha's dad the one to inspire her to draw and create animation just as Walt inspires us/a new generation of dreamers to this day? (Are we just going to gloss over the fact that Asha created her own snippet of animation? And that she must love to draw because she has so many pictures in her notebook? Can we please have a Disney heroine that loves to not only draw but animate?) And if Asha is about to turn 18 and her grandpa is turning 100, how does that work?! How old is her mother? Did they not have kids until they were in their 40s? Is he Asha's great great grandpa instead? If he's turning 100, should he know more about the city's history? Should he be older than Magnifico? DOES HE KNOW ABOUT THE STORY IN THE TAPESTRY THAT MAGNIFICO IS TRYING SO DESPERATELY TO NOT HAVE HAPPEN TWICE? JENNIFER LEE, I HAVE QUESTIONS AND I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO HAVE, LIKE, FOUR OF THEM ANSWERED PLEASE.

*deep breaths*

Valentino is Olaf without the heart. Let me explain. Olaf is a comic relief sidekick. He's also the reason Elsa and Anna reconnected after years of isolation and is a core memory for the girls. He's their holiday tradition. He's their friend. Elsa made him. Olaf, whether you love him or like him, is an essential part of the story of Frozen. Valentino is a comic relief sidekick. He's Asha's three week old friend/pet/buddy/cute animal. Um. He talks now. He's super cute. Love his outfit. Says some funny lines. Alan Tudyk. .... That's about it.

Chris Pine knocked this out of the damn park. Excellent voice acting on his part, loved his inflections and growls and everything in between. Very nice. Handsome king is handsome. Yes.

Asha and her friends are a better retelling of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs than that live action movie will ever hope to be (if it ever gets finished).

Like I said, I did like this movie. Being the Disney nerd that I am, I was a sucker for all the references to previous Disney films (heck, the freaking opening text got me) and I'm going to go through this movie with a fine tooth comb the second I get my hands on a pause button on Disney+ to find them all. This movie seems to be getting a lot of hate which I don't think is warranted but there's obvious flaws and holes a mile wide in the plot. I'm hovering between a 6 or a 7 out of 10 or a solid B rating at the moment of writing this.

Also Asha is a tour guide and I am a tour guide so we're practically twins.

[tsuki-sennin]

A victory lap! One final issue with our heroes before the end! Our foe? Daijarg! Our mission? Protect the world one last time! And after that...?

Episode 50 of Hirogaru Sky! Pretty Cure~!

Spoilers, I guess...

-Ikuyo!

-One last time hearing this theme for the road...

-You've come such a long way from being an unusually athletic girl, huh Sora-chan?

-You've explored the surface world, battled monster after monster, made many unforgettable friends and memories along the way...

-And even when you wavered, you still kept your friends and family at the forefront of your mind.

-And uh... while I'm here, I might as well get my nitpicking outta the way.

-Uhhhhhh, I would've preferred if the villains all interacted with one another a lot more than they did, Captain Shalala's cool but a little underutilized, the supporting cast in general's just kinda... there a lot of the time...

-...that's it, really. I've gotten quite literally everything else I could've wanted from this season.

-Anyways, enough about me, FINAL BATTLE TIME WOOOOOO

-Spin that dangernoodle!

-You give a bad name to sneks everywhere.

-To you, dear Underg Generals... thank you!

-Not a form left to our names!

-OH FUCK INSERT

-This is everything

-One more time! For truth, justice, and a better tomorrow! Hirogaru Change~!

-Hirogaruuuuuuu

-Sekai Puuuuuuuuuuunch!

-"The only real power comes from inside, Skearhead! From courage, honor, and other things you wouldn't understand!"

-Precure! Majestic Halation!

-Now you understand your failure. Find peace in the next life, Skearhead.

-Hooooooome~!

-Hooooooly shit!

-Awwwww, Kaizerin...

-Adooooorable~!

-"Sorry. Comms filled atm."

-Peace and love for Skyland and Underg~!

-See, doesn't that feel nice?

-Hello, Captain Shalala! ...sorry I thought you were gonna pull a Nolan Grayson however many episodes ago.

-Beryberie... In another life, you'd have been one of my favorite Cures.

-Oh, the schoolmates too!

-...this is embarassing, but uh... I done forgot about you guys...

-D'aaaaawwww... Mashiron's gonna miss her husband~! Well, don't you worry.

-There's no such thing as goodbye forever, is there? Not when there's Transdimensional Technology~! Just uh... be careful not to accidentally unleash Weirdmageddon or something and we'll all be grand.

-God, it is so weird seeing Elle dwarf Tsubasa round the clock now.

-Never say that to me again.

-That's our town of Sorashido.

-...how very fortuitous of Sora to end up here, I just realized.

-Hmm.

-Our beloved Hero notebooks.

-Suppose we're gonna see you around, Granny Goodness. Er uh... Yoyo-san, sorry.

-My one regret is that I did not continue to lay down the Skyward Sword jokes, you'd have made a fantastic Impa.

-"I knew you were good kids the first time I saw you. :)"

-Hug your daughter, Mashiron.

-Auntie Ageha too~!

-Tsubasa-kun's got lunch...

-The Borb Sage...

-Oh???

-Yeaaaaaaah!

-Buddy, I say you're on your way.

-Off the princess and her retainer go.

-"So... like..."

-"Nah."

-142 TIMES

-MY GIRL REALLY TRACKED EVERY SINGLE INSTANCE OF HER HOLDING ANOTHER GIRL'S HAND BRO-

-Oh of course you're joking. You forgot a few digits, didn't you?

-"My hero..."

-Reviews in for Nijigaoka-sensei's latest picture book.

-"Charmingly written, beautifully drawn, exceptionally daring. Delightfully reaffirms everything one might love about their favorite superheroes. Hirogaru Sky makes its mark as one of the finest its esteemed lineage has to offer."

-Oh, hi!

-It's you assholes again, I see!

-Ageha Jumpscare

-Oh shit, the first ED again!

-Man...

-I'm exceptionally happy I got to enjoy this season.

-I suppose we'll see you all again sometime soon.

-Cure Sky jumps into action!

-WAN

-Cure Wonderful~!

-...I was gonna fucking use that name, but that's okay~!

-Now it's time for me to pack up and move to Animal Town... wherever that is... See you all on Feb 4th, I suppoooooooose~!

[8054yamato]

I reread the entries I have made. It has almost been a year and a half since creating this Tumblr and even longer for my other abandoned online diary. There are so many posts that I have made out of irony that I feel like most people that stumble upon those will believe I am being serious. I do not blame them.

Anyways, how are any of you doing?

Me, myself, and I for these past four or five months of Tumblr inactivity have been doing well. I (finally) have income and its rate is enough to retire by 30. However, I am not sure if I am able to sustain or improve the flow consistently throughout a year let alone 11. I just have to keep marching forward and not tell a soul about my success. Money really solves everything in this world.

Let us talk about my hobbies (so far) as well as hobbies I eventually would like to incorporate.

My current hobbies are calisthenics, dance, research, and matcha because I am and have always been a matcha nigga.

Future hobbies I would like to do is being a car guy, a pianist, a guitarist, and a vocalist. In return, I would have to drop research and dance as my regular hobby because by then I would already be too old for those (I would be near 30 by then).

My current source of income is by being an ************. I can not give an accurate and stable yearly income as today may not be the same as tomorrow. Before taxes though, it would be **k per month.

Why the asterisks? It looks very cool.

My future source of income by the time I retire around 30 would just be through the stock market and live off passive income.

I had wrapped up what I am currently doing in a short, concise manner. I can go into detail about specifics, but I am not in the mood for that.

I hope all of you are doing well. If you are feeling down or feel like you are not making progress, believe in yourself. My biggest advise would not to chase for your goals in a one-dimension type of way, but you should actually incorporate a system that would allow you to achieve said goal naturally.

If you also feel like a shit person and would like a redo or change, I want you to go to your notebook or Notes app right now and list the qualities of what (in your opinion) the ideal person should be. Ignore what the general consensus or anybody else's opinion. What you write down should be made up of only your opinion.

Now, ask yourself what that ideal person may do in their day to day. Incorporate their hobbies into your life and habits they may perform.

If you see no result after a month, two months, half a year, or even a year, keep on marching on. To you, there may be no result, but to the outside who may see you regularly or at irregular intervals, they 100% will notice the shift. 80% of your struggle comes from the mental. Remember that and stay consistent.

Love.