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#genuinely like. why the hell am i thinking about how a-ok i would be with my friend kissing me when said friend is having a mini breakdown
hearties-circus · 1 year
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I swear this is like some hollyoaks shit huh
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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prev post reminds me a friend told me last week she doesnt believe i actually struggle with emotional volatility/dysregulation like ive mentioned before bc shes never seen it firsthand...............
#i dont even know what to tell u girl. i couldnt even give her examples to dispute it bc i find it so shameful and difficult to talk abt#and it would probably be upsetting to her to hear the sort of things that have triggered me. and how ive coped with the outbursts#as if i dont structure all social interaction in my life around trying to swallow this shit down so ppl find me just about tolerable enough#genuinely hurtful thing to hear from someone i care abt. im not upset at her anymore abt it bc what would be the point man#i can understand why she thinks that + i cant control what she believes. but it did bother me a lot + some trust has been lost there.#esp considering she struggles w getting ppl to believe her when she talks abt how she feels bc she doesnt necessarily express it outwardly#in ways other ppl expect. like since ik that im always going to try to assume shes being honest so i dont disrespect how she feels#but its hypocritical + more than a little unfair to not offer other people the same trust + respect. why wont u take me at face value#and anyway why the hell would i say i struggle w controlling my emotions if i dont. what clout am i getting from claiming that#even admitting it is a hard thing for me.... and if thats too much for her to accept it just becomes a barrier in our friendship.#shame but i shouldve expected it tbh. anyway its ok ive moved on no point dwelling on it i dont want to bring it up again#bc theres nothing to gain from it. an apology wouldnt change anything since thats what she genuinely thinks#and whatever she wants to believe doesnt change the fact it is True and likely the biggest cause of strife I experience in my life#blegh stopping there bc im edging into rumination now#god im so tired. bedtime soon i think but maybe ill play a quick game or smth to make it to 10pm.... this week has been so long#.diaries
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drowninginthoughts27 · 5 months
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Not to vent but I think my biggest fear is failure but I’m also like so set up for it. Self sabotage is all I know.
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jyoongim · 1 month
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Alastors lover who is such small happy thing, always smiling but not like alastor creepy way, and who always dot on alastor and babies him. She never really got scared of him and always looks at him in awe in his demon form.
Think it would be amusing, hell even he would find it amusing such a small thing fussing and being overprotective on him.
You were quite a pleasant addition to the hotel. 
Unlike your partner, you were sweet and helpful.
Alastor thought your presence would ease the frazzled nerves of the residents if you were by his side.
You always wore a smile on your face, it wasn’t like Alastor’s ever present and malicious smile. 
It was genuine.
It was interesting to see how you and Alastor interacted.
The Overlord didnt mind your touches and fretting. He let you do what you please.
The two of you were polar opposites.
But opposite attract…and in those case it was just fascinating.
You were in the kitchen preparing dinner. Humming a soft tune as you cooked.
Most of the residents weren’t picky eaters and they loved your cooking, so you prepared something that everyone would like.
Once you finished everyone’s dinner, you started on making Alastor’s.
Alastor had rather peculiar tastes.
The kitchen filled with the residents as the smell of food wafted through the hotel.
You already had their plates prepared and dressed. Multiple voices chirped with appreciative remarks as they dug in.
Your smile widened when soft static filled the air, a feathery touch wrapped around you before Alastor’s voice greeted your ears.
”Morning doll! Dont you look hellish today” 
Your big doe eyes turned to greet his sharp ones.
“Good morning Al. Take a seat, Im almost done cookinng”
The tall red demon hummed as he took a seat at the table.
His ears flicked as you approach with a steaming plate.
”I hope you like it. Im not sure of the taste. I’ve never cooked flesh before but it looked a bit like sausage so I think it’ll be ok”
You heard several gags.
Alastor waved you off, picking up a fork “Oh I’m sure its fine. Your cooking ain’t ever failed me yet”
You finally took a seat to enjoy your own plate.
You chatted with the gang. Laughing at Angel’s jokes and agreeing with Charlie’s plans and offering advice for the day and talking with Vaggie.
Once dinner was over, everyone went about their night.
It was only you and Alastor left.
He sighed as he finished his food. “You have quite a way in the kitchen my dear. Dinner was delicious”
You giggled, taking his plate to wash.
The two of you chatted as you washed the dishes. He slithered behind you, arms wrapping around your waist as his head settled on your shoulder.
The two of you stood there in bliss until you finished and turned around.
“Why don’t you listen in on a broadcast tonight? Im sure you’ll find it entertaining” he chuckled.
You smiled as he escorted you to his radio tower.
———————————————————————-
“Alastor you need to see the tailor. Look at this!” You scowled as you held up his tail coat. The ends were raggedy, it was missing a button or two, and needed a few adjustments.
Alastor chuckled “I will make time to visit when Im out today”
You shook your head “No ill do it. You have a meeting today so don’t worry” Alastor’s brows raised “Then what am I to wear dear?”
You rummaged through the closet and pulled out another jacket. 
Alastor’s shadow wrapped around you, purring happily as you helped Alastor get ready.
Once he was properly dressed he bided you a goodbye before you stopped him.
You held his tie ”You’re not dressed properly. You want to be fully dress to terrorize the masses”
You smiled as you began to tie his bow tie around his neck. Alastor tilted his head as he watched you. You were much smaller compared to the demon. He watched as you focused on your task and mumble to yourself. You were so cute. Such a sweet soul you were. Fretting over a powerful Overlord.
Once in place, you fluffed it out and soothed out any wrinkles in his attire.
You beamed once you took a step back and admired your work. “There all ready and fashionable”
Alastor looked in the mirror and smiled at your work.
While he usually dressed in red, you had put him in black. You tucked a red handkerchief in his breast pocket and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.
Static popped and buzzed affectionately and before he could pull you into him, you pushed him to the door. “Now off with you. You have a busy day”
—————————————————————————-
Your small fame stood in front of Alastor as a sinner pulled his knife. You were growling and your hair swirled around you as your demonic form appeared.
The sinner laughed “Tsk! What man need a woman to defend him? Haha! Why don’t you settle down sweetheart hmm? After I kill this loser I can show you what a real man is like” he said suggestively, making your eyes narrow.
A large hand touched your shoulder “I can handle this dear” the sinner’s eyes widened as Alastor transformed and went to scream, but inky, black tentacles shot out from behind you to grab the demon.
Alastor stalked past you and tore into the demon, ripping him apart.
While most found Alastor’s demon form terrifying, you found it beautiful.
You watched as blood and limbs flew about, but you focused on Alastor.
He had grew twice his size, black antlers flared out and tall, deep growls and manic laughter erupted from his chest.
He sighed and patted himself down as he turned his nose up at the mess. Your hand skimmed his arm, to alert him of your presence. When he turned to you, blood covered his face. You lifted the hem of your dress and dapped it at his face, tutting “This face is too handsome to be covered in blood. You sure made a mess…Look at you! Its gonna take me forever to get these stains out” you huffed as you wiped his face clean. You smiled once he was clean. “Next time let m take care of it. I am perfectly capable of protecting myself or you if need be”
Alastor let out a chuckle, placing a claw under your chin. He leaned in to place a soft kiss to your lips
”You are very amusing my dear. Most cower in fear at my presence”
You rolled your eyes, lips curling wide “You don’t scare me Mr. Radio Demon” you leaned into him as he wrapped an arm around you and went about the day.
What a interesting little soul you were indeed.
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waggledoogledoggle · 4 months
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⚠️Spoilers for Hazbin ep 4⚠️
⚠️Also, this post will talk about Abuse and SA, it is briefly mentioned a few times throughout the rest of this… whole long thingy I wrote⚠️
⚠️Also, brief mention of the scene where someone tried to drug Angel⚠️
Ok, I am just genuinely baffled at the people who somehow find a way to hate on 'Loser, Baby'.
Like, if you don't like Huskerdust that's fine... but 'Loser, Baby' is not overshadowing/brushing off Angel's SA. It's not victim blaming. And it's not Husk telling Angel to just shut up and get over it.
Like I've seen it so much, and you know what? Fuck it. Welcome to my TedTalk on why it's not all of those things.
For starters: Husk doesn't know about Angel's SA
When Angel has his vulnerable outburst (Side note, props to Blake I mean, they said 'take 5' he heard 'change lives') he talks about how he feels like he has to act the way he does to keep Valentino happy because he stupidly sold his soul to him. That he wants to get drugged up because that’s his escape. That he wants to be broken because maybe, just maybe Val will let him go. He wants to be free, but he can't and he has no one to blame but himself.
"What's the worst part of this hell, I can only blame myself" is literally the pre chorus to his song (Poison), and that is what he shares with Husk.
Not once does he bring up his abuse or SA. If he did, do you think a song would have even happened? Look how Husk reacted when someone tried to drug Angel's drink! Now that Husk actually genuinely cares about him? Dead. Dead. Valentino would be dead.
We as the audience know more than the other characters. We were given the insight of Angel's true trauma.l that he deals with on the daily. You can't get upset at a character for not knowing something they would have no way of knowing unless it was shared with them.
Moving onto the song itself, it's a song of empathy.
Allow me to explain.
Husk pinpoints perfectly what Angel is feeling in this moment:
"So things look bad, and your back's against the wall Your whole existence seems fuckin' hopeless You're feelin' filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall Can't face the world sober and dopeless You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked"
When Husk starts singing, you can tell that Angel is expecting Husk to pull the whole "But that's not true! It's not hopeless! You're life's not wrecked!" and is very surprised when Husk doesn't.
Instead, Husks says "Yeah. You're right." And this is when a lot of the haters get angry- but hold on a second.
When someone is feeling all of those things, saying things like "That's not true! You'll be ok!" aren't helpful at all. That's brushing it off. Even if it may be true, that doesn't help anyone when they're feeling like hopeless, lost, losers.
Because that's sympathy, not empathy. Sympathy is feeling for someone, and trying to make them feel better. Empathy, is not trying to make them feel any certain way- better or worse- empathy is simply feeling with someone. And that's what Husk does.
During the first chorus, Husk is clearly teasing Angel a bit while doing so, but not without good reason. It's keeping Angel from closing back up again, he's being a little bit silly with him and teasing him. I mean, did you see the silly lil walk he did crossing in front of Angel? And Angel is super confused because he's like "how tf is this supposed to make me feel better??"
That's the thing. It's not. That's sympathy's job, not empathy's. Empathy just want's you to feel felt with, it doesn't want to tell you how to feel. And adding that bit of silliness gives Angel's vulnerability a chance to breathe and it prevents Angel from closing in on himself.
The next verse, pre-chorus, and chorus is when the empathy though really kicks in.
The next verse, is the first part of empathy: Sharing about a similar experience you went through.
In this verse, now that Angel is listening not just hearing, Husk shares that he has been gruesomely damaged. Calling back to what he shared literally seconds before the song. That he knows what it's like to sign away your soul, and constantly look back at it with huge amounts of regret. That knowing that moment is what turned him into the mess he is today, and that he has no one to blame but himself. Just like Angel.
Then in the pre-chorus where there's the whole:
"I sold my soul to a psychopathic freak Haha! And you think that makes you unique? Get outta here, man!"
That isn't Husk telling Angel to get over himself and this isn’t him undermining what Angel’s been through. That's him saying 'I did too, you're not alone’
And then the very simple word change from "you're" to "we're" in the chorus is SO FREAKING HUGE. Because Husk is essentially saying "You feel like a total loser right now. Ok. Then if what happened to you/what you went through makes you a loser, then I'm a loser too. Let's be loser's together." Instead of trying to make Angel stop feeling like he's a hopeless loser, he decides that he is too.
He meets Angel where he is.
Aka: ✨empathy✨
Angel finally feels seen, understood, felt with. All the goals of empathy. He no longer feels alone in what he is struggling with, which is HUGE! Especially for people going through/dealing with SA and abuse.
The bridge of the song, is also extremely important, because this is where they acknowledge the differences in what they're going through. Their root problem is the same, but how it messed up their lives and created the problems they deal with now are completely different
And that's around when the song begins to shift from just Husk showing empathy and comforting Angel, to them both finding comfort in each other.
Which you can clearly see by the chorus under the umbrella, where it's not just one of them singing the chorus, but it's both of them. Because they have found a place to go to and confide in, a place of comfort, with each other.
Like, I am genuinely concerned that people find this song toxic like... have- have you never experienced empathy before? Are you ok?
So yeah, to wrap this up, if you don’t like ‘Loser, Baby’ just because you don’t like the song in general? That’s fine (odd, but fine)
But if you hate it because it “undermines Angel’s experience and what he goes through” I…
words.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk
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simmyfrobby · 2 months
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Being a bitch about the leafs getting a dewey is immature. Sadposting and making little edits about how awful Toronto is? Fuck off. Just because your team cant make the playoffs dont blame the teams that can. We will love him on the leafs. Get over yourself.
okay so i normally delete these kinda asks without bothering w a reply because i honestly think they’re kind of tiresome & because i know you’re just being a fan and if i can forgive wild fans for being unreasonable about their team i then i can forgive leafs fans for it too. 
with that said: braindead take.
just. stupid. so stupid, in fact, that i will write a reply because i think it genuinely might make me feel a little better. 
okay so lets start right at the end. WHY should i get over the fact that a player i like is no longer on my team. why should it matter that you’ll love him. my team was sold of in little bits to teams i either don’t care about or actively root against. 
that?? sucks?? 
i care about my team. i want my team to win. i want my favourite players to stay on my team and when they don’t that’s upsetting. this is not a revolutionary concept.
also the way it all played out was kinda shitty. i knew we would likely lose duhaime, but after losing pat i thought we would maybe get to keep dewar. and when the deadline passed i thought we were ok. hell, even connor thought he was safe. and that he would get to stay with his friends. and then it turns out we lost him at the last second. and that’s fucking gutting. 
“we will love him in toronto” ok. even if that is true, my favourite toy was taken away and given to some other kid. i don’t care whether or not they’re happy to have him. i didn’t want to give him away. were you happy for the canes when bunting went there instead of coming back to the leafs??? no because that’s not how this works. i don’t want good things for the leafs i want good things for my team. i don’t want other teams to win i want my team to win
and that’s allowed.
encouraged even.
“sadposting and making little edits” ok this is fair and accurate and i might make it my blog title if you don’t mind. it is funny to me that you interpret that poem as being about how much the leafs suck and not about?? how being traded suddenly?? and your best friend being traded away?? sucks??? poems are funny things and don’t say anything definitively, so you are allowed to interpret it however you like, but i haven’t gotten any angry avs fans in my inbox yelling about my "duhaime sadposts"?
but ok! directors note & something worth keeping in the back of your mind when interacting w this edit and also all other dewar edits: 
This is not!!! About you!!! 
i am not trying to hurt your feelings!! i do not care about your team!! for the love of god please just unfollow my blog.
also. and this is pedantic but i want to say it because its been bothering me. you don’t get “A Dewey”, you get Connor Dewar. the deweys were a matched set and without duhaime on the same team what does that even matter. you don’t get “dewey 2” you get Connor Dewar. congrats! that's great! he’s wonderful. please treat him nice etc etc.
being a bitch about the leafs is immature and i will do a better job of tagging my anti-leafs posts from now on. ill even tag all of my dewey poems as anti leafs if they're this upsetting to you.
one final thing: the wild not making the playoffs is very much the fault of other teams and i absolutely could blame other teams for it. theyre better and they beat us and now we might not make the playoffs. again: that's how this works. i get your point though, its not the leafs´ fault the wild have been miserable this season but i reserve the right to dislike them either way :)
congrats on the cute little guy. i will miss him very much. and again: PLEASE unfollow.
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idkwhatimdoingbutslay · 8 months
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… I can’t imagine that we actually watched the same show. Like I REALLY AISNSOSNWKMEJDND
hold on I’m gonna need to calm down.
Let me just make a list of why I disagree and at least organize my anger. Long post incoming.
Vander was friends and had a deal with Grayson. The sheriff. Idk what else to even add to that
Caitlyn is more than a cop and Arcane isn’t copaganda. Genuinely don’t know what kind of progress some of these people are looking for. Real allies are a necessity for real progress.
SILCO IS A CLASS TRAITOR. HE FUNNELLED DRUGS INTO THE UNDERCITY AND PUT POOR KIDS IN FACTORIES FOR THAT DRUG FOR PROFIT!!! HE PAID THE ENFORCERS TO LET HIM DO IT WITHOUT CONSEQUENCE
Vi is not as much as an activist as you would like to believe
WHY IS EKKO NEVER EVER BROUGHT UP IN THESE CONVERSATIONS????
Silco was not good for the Undercity
Silco was not a great guy. Ekko had to build an entire separate hidden community for the people he hurt and stepped on for his own benefit
Caitlyn is ignorant and naive. That’s ok. That’s what character development is for.
Loving imperfect characters like Silco and Jinx then hating characters like Vi and Caitlyn is peak media illiteracy to me
FOR THE LAST TIME: VI DIDNT ABANDON POWDER!!!!! Silco literally wanted Vi DEAD for trying to stop him from killing Vander??? How could you possibly say silco was there for jinx when Vi refused to be???? SHE WAS IN PRISON BECAUSE OF HIM???
Silco’s manipulation is working wonders on y’all
Embracing all the outrage without at all looking out for the people harmed by bigotry is not activism
SILCO IS A CLASS TRAITOR x929282929394
Caitlyn was the first person in years to show Vi kindness and care. She listened and stuck by her and took care of her after Vi was locked up for years and beat up by cops (i wonder what led her to be thrown in there?). Cait being a cop stopped being a point of contention once Vi recognized her naivety and genuineness.
NUANCE NUANCE NUANCE. ITS NEVER EVER BLACK AND WHITE
The only way I can see Vi touching ‘class traitor’ in season one was the shimmer raid. Guess who the hell put those kids in there in the first place.
Just hanging out with Caitlyn isn’t being a class traitor if Vander’s allowed to be friends with Grayson.
Critical thinking is very necessary for watching shows like Arcane
What the hell did Silco really do for the Undercity???? What changed over the 7(ish) years he was basically in power of the place? All I’ve heard was he made the air cleaner, which would be great except for, you know, shimmer and the child factory workers
Jinx is unwell and feeding into it like this in a fully serious manor would not help Arcane as a show at all
What do you want Arcane’s message as a full show to be? ‘Screw cops’? That’s a little boring and unproductive isn’t it?
CAN WE TALK ABOUT EKKO AND HIS IMPACT PLEASE???? x9382728283
Caitlyn is trying to make Piltover and Zaun a better place. Is that not allowed? Am I missing something?
Caitlyn and Vi’s arcs have only just started. Season one is basically fully set up except for characters like silco and Jinx. This is far from the end.
Genuinely think Vander would appreciate Vi for being friends (using this term loosely because they are in love) with Caitlyn considering he was the one who was opposed to war and Vi wasn’t.
Silco should NOT be your idea of Undercity independence and respect. He oppressed the Undercity the same way the Council and the Enforcers did. He helped no one but himself, his team (barely) and Jinx.
You’re allowed to like and dislike any character you want but pretending like Silco is better for the Undercity than others is just so ridiculous to me. Everyone is of course completely allowed to like Silco, but we can’t pretend like he’s this stand up guy. If you have to pretend like he was, maybe you don’t like him as much as you think.
“Because Cait’s pretty” is also incredibly incorrect. Go check point #14.
Vi never stopped loving and caring for Powder. Powder’s mental health issues were amplified and utilized by Silco because he couldn’t even heal himself.
If all of your opinions of Caitlyn and Vi start and end with “cops suck” and “class traitor” then you genuinely don’t respect Arcane as a show enough to show you nuance.
The misinterpretation of characters is just so … it’s like you go out of your way to love and/or hate characters no matter how much they show you who you are.
Your closed mindedness is clouding your judgement and making you out to seem like you don’t actually want the Undercity’s triumph, you want Silco and Jinx’s, even if it means ruining the Undercity. And that would be fine because father/daughter evil duo but trying to say you’re all for this duo because you want what’s better for the Undercity when they continue to hurt it is simply not correct and very harmful (to fictional characters in a fictional universe 😭)
Only being able to understand how Silco and Jinx were oppressed and therefore should be able to not just destroy Piltover but also Zaun is not the eat you think it is
Why is Viktor never called a class traitor? I think he's great (I also think Silco and Jinx are wonderfully written) but we hardly saw him in the Undercity/ interact with people from the Undercity plus he killed someone (Sky) from there (accidentally)
EDIT TO ADD ANOTHER POINT: Caitlyn has shown little to NO malicious intent and has no real negative impacts other than Jinx’s attachment issues and insecurities being amplified by her mere existence. Again, this is her story and development. Throughout the season she is exposed to reality and recognizes her and her peers/ families wrongs. I have no idea what you want from this character. Should Piltover just be gotten rid of in the story? Then what? Should Caitlyn have just never gotten involved and continued to embrace her privilege? Should she have left Vi in prison and stay ignorant?
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cattonicdragon · 1 year
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could you do mantis, tigress, viper, po, shen, tai lung, kai x a white peacock reader that can manipulate all forms of physics? For reference, the White Peacock Reader has the ability to manipulate all forms of physics regardless of laws. Other have sent you this type of question, so I am sending you this type of question. And I love your stuff too.
mantis,tigress,viper,po,shen,tai lung and kai x white peacock reader who can manipulate all forms of physics
I'm glad you like my stuff! And of course I can
Not been proof read yet I just wanted to post it 😭
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Mantis
He finds you beauty and grace very admirable
You fight with such ferocity and grace it's almost unbelievable
He thinks that your powers are really cool but also really scary since they dont abide to any of the laws
Meaning you can do things that shouldn't physically be possible
Thinks that your some kind of God or something,maybe you've just been blessed by the gods
Not to much sparing,he fears that hell be crushed before he can even move
He asks to trace the patterns on your feathers(if you have any patterns)
He wonders if your tail can get in the way when fighting
Your fighting style is literally drop dead gorgeous
Saw you phase through a wall once,cant unsee it
Scary for in battle but very useful as an ally
He asks if you know why your white instead of the usually colours
Very curious about you
Your very mysterious
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Tigress
She finds your beauty breath taking but remembers during battle not to be distracted
Shes curious of how you got your powers,did you learn them?,if so who was your master?,were you born with them?,does it run in your family?
Lots of questions
Training constantly
You've bested her more times then she cares to admit
She'll say that you cheated
Shes not saying that because she thinks you incapable,shes just saying that to try and mend her wounded pride
Her leg has phased through you and she lost the match because her brain practically stopped working for a minute or so
She likes to stay on your good side,mainly because she genuinely fears your powers
She believes that you can control them well but the things you can do,shouldn't be humanly/animaly possible
She likes to help clean your tail if you allow her
She wonders how you can fight with such a big tail
She fears fears what people will say when she tells them she lost a match to you,so you tell her that she can say you lost sometimes
She finds it scary and impressiv how much you can do,you can control things like the weather,solid matter etc.
She asks about your origins and if there may have been a particular reason as to why you were born as a white peacock with such immense power
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Viper
brought to you by the same gif,again
As a previous ribbon dancer she likes to see the art in different peopls kung fu/fighting style,which meand she loved the way you fight
Such precision and beauty
She thinks your way to overpowerd
Like if you wanted to you could legit just walk on water
Dont like cold noodles?,ok lemme just,heat that up for u rq
She likes to stay relatively on your good side
She will ask to put flowers in your feathers,if you allow her to she will be ecstatic
Such a sweet heart
If you give her a feather as a gift of luck she may just pass out
If you have any patterns on your feathers she likes to trance them with her tail or just look at it
Shes scared to get priced by your sharp talons in battle/sparing
Loves your feathers
Shes curious to your feather colour being white but wont dig or think to deep about it
She just puts it down as being an unique quality of yours
Your tail can get annoying every so often
She likes how you input your tail into your fighting style
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Po
Your white feathers give him a tad bit of PTSD
He find the way you fight majestical,almost as if hes watching a play
He likes your feather and asks how you keep them so clean
He would be very hesitant with you sometimes due to the fact you remind him of someone
He thinks white suits you
Hes very surprised,fascinated and intrigued apon finding out about your powers
Your powers are like nothing hes ever seen before and he loves it
He likes to have long training sessions with you to try find a weakspot
He wants you to try teach him
Even if you tell him it's your genes and not taught he will still ask,there no hurt in trying
Liked your tail but it is very big
He likes making noodles for you both and sitting under a tree on a rainy day,knowing that your the reason your both not drenched in water
He wonders how you obtained such power and wonders what It would be like going all on out dragon warrior against you
He gets distracted by your feather alot
If you were to ever give him a feather hed treat it like a treasure that needs to be protected at any cost
Likes to watch your methods of fighting because he wants to try doing it himself
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Shen
Hes rather shocked apon learning that there another white peacock
And your very powerful
In some ways hes happy that theres another peacock since he wont feel as lonely being the only white one but then again he in some ways feels like that was a huge part of his character
Apon first meeting you he gets extremely defensive and accuses you of being an imposter,even though you never said a single thing
Has alot of curiosity about your powers
Shen will try test your limits and see if you just unleash your powers out of pure emotion,he has morbid curiosity
He likes to spar ALOT
He likes to talk to you about how he created the cannons aswell as what he did to get the result
Hes very clingy and will often hang around you
Should anyone speak bad about you if you dont handle it,he will gladly
He finds a sick kind of pleasure from having so powerfull by his side
He throws firework shows for you
If you are good with close combat he will get a custom commissioned weapon of your choice for you
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Tai lung
Although he finds your white feathers beautiful he also feels threatened
The pure reason for this is power
Hes been a star student for so long,the best of the best and you show up and have more power than him
Hes very stand off ish at first
He warms up to you eventually,its just a case of him getting there
He comes to find the brutality and accuracy of your fighting method
He trains with you at any given chance,hes not afraid to fight someone stronger than him and he will most likely go in blind,refusing to learn anything from his opponent
He asks if your methods can be taught and is a bit sulky if it cant
Hes not going to underestimate you by a long shot,hes more likely to overestimate you
He finds you feathers pretty and can momentarily find himself losing focus in training
If you gave him a feather he'd treat it as if it were his life sorce
He believes that when he achieves the dragon scroll you two will finally be even
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Kai
Other than oogway he hasnt seen such powerful chi before
Nor has he seen the types of power you weild
Your a mystery at first,a mysterious white peacock shows up one day and has practically limitless power?
Hes going to be after your chi,no doubts
After awhile it's much like having a frenemy
"Still havnt given up your chi,(name)?""still havnt defeated oogway,kai?"
Its can go back and forth like this for a very long time,which it usually ends with you slipping through solid matter to escape
It gets to the point whether hes unsure if he still wants to take your chi
It would give him so much raw power but hes grown...fond of you
Which he hates to admit and probally wont
Once you become acquaintances tho it will turn into sparring seasons often
He brings his jombies out every so often to spice things up
He likes how smoothly you execute your kung fu moves/attacks
However in the end he still technically got what he wanted,just differently
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spiderbussy · 11 months
Text
The Hating Game
Dylan O’Brien x Reader
WARNINGS: mentions of sex, steamy moments (but no smut), swearing, lots of anger/hatred, i think that’s all??
i wrote this a whole year ago and dug it up from deep in the drafts and it’s not entirely awful so i figured i might as well publish??? also edited whilst watching some killer shark movie LMFAOO so it might be a lot worse than i think jshsjs,, quick PSA tho: i dont rlly feel comfy writing for real people anymore, and i don’t like writing smut, so whilst this is relatively steamy there’s no actual smut in it :) hopefully someone enjoys lmfao
there is also a high likelihood that i will be deleting this soon bc i am Embarrassed
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Being mortal fucking enemies with your co-worker is not exactly what you envisioned your first serious acting job to entail, but no one can have everything, you suppose. Like, it makes sense, from a realistic (OK, pessimistic) standpoint that getting hired to be a main character on a popular teen TV show with little to no acting experience and the only thing to your name being an apartment you’re about to get evicted out of for not paying your bills is exceedingly lucky. Like, come on, what are the fucking odds? And everyone knows that something so good is bound to be followed by something bad. In your case, something you consider the worst thing that could possibly happen to a person, and his name is Dylan O’Brien.
First off, you know. Dylan O’Brien. Every teenage girls wet dream. He’s a conventionally attractive white guy who respects women because he doesn’t actively spit on them! (You’re not saying he’s sexist, because you’re pretty sure that’s not why he hates you, it’s just because he’s tasteless and a dick.)
Here’s the thing, though. Ever since you started this job, he’s had it out for you. Like, genuinely, he’s fucking evil and is trying to ruin your life. Why is this? You have no clue, only that you hate him back equally as much, if not more.
What really sucks, though, is that this is the guy who’s playing your love interest. At first, this wasn’t even really a problem for you (only to your controlling ex-boyfriend — good fucking riddance, by the way), but it became one when you overheard Dylan actively begging the shows head writer and producer, Jeff, to cancel that plot and then storming off like a complete and utter wankstain when he was denied.
Your character's first kiss scene has had to be filmed at least a million times by now, and the crew is starting to really get pissed off by it, which, like, fair enough, you are too, but it’s not your fault you and Dylan can’t even pretend to be romantically interested in each other for five minutes! The scene itself isn’t even the problem, you’ve nailed that, it’s the kiss. The gentle, loving kiss your characters are supposed to share, and Jeff is an asshole and every time he’d yell at you and Dylan you’d both just get more and more pissed at each other, and the kiss would get progressively more and more heated and angry with every retake.
That’s where you’re at now, bordering on eating each other’s faces (excuse you while you yack!) as Jeff yells “cut!” for the fifty-millionth time. You and Dylan instantly spring apart, awkwardly avoiding eye contact as Jeff sighs. Using the back of your hand, you wipe your mouth, only to pull it back to find blood. Literal fucking blood.
“Did you bite me, you fucking pervert?” you whisper-yell at Dylan so that the crew aren’t prone to any more unprofessional behavior you exhibit. The stinging in your lip grows more profound, and you scoff. “Oh my fucking God, you bit me.”
Dylan smirks, shrugging his shoulders as he glares back at you tenfold. He’s oozing this nonchalant smugness, and you feel more pissed at him than ever.
“How the hell was that ‘gentle’ or ‘loving’!?” you continue quietly yelling at him as Jeff talks with the rest of the crew, his hands rubbing over the creases on his forehead.
Dylan’s smirk falls, as he glares at you with incredulity, “How was pulling my hair like, five minutes ago, any more ‘gentle’ or ‘loving’?!” he spits back.
Part of you wants to admit that that was genuinely an accident, but, like, whatever. Dylan would probably take it the wrong way, interpreting it as you being kinky and attracted to him. “OK,” you say instead, “act like you didn’t moan when I did that, you freak.”
“I moaned in pain,” he argues, eyebrows scrunched and a fire in his eyes as he unconsciously steps towards you.
You open your mouth, ready to retort with another remark with the intent to insult him, but Jeff’s voice quickly cuts the two of you off. “OK, guys, it’s been a long day but we’re gonna try it again,” he breathes out, rubbing his hands together before he suddenly stops, eyes narrowing in on your lip. “Jesus, OK, what the hell, your lip is bleeding Y/N.”
“Sorry about that,” Dylan smirks, poorly feigning being apologetic. And this guy’s supposed to be an actor, Jesus Christ.
“Right,” Jeff sighs, so obviously done with the both of you as you glare daggers at Dylan, which only seems to widen his smirk. “Um, OK, so this time… Dylan, try not to eat Y/N, OK? And, guys, try not to step on each other’s feet… or kick each other… the camera may not be able to see down there, but it shows, and we cab. Um, so, both of you…. just… gentle and loving, OK? This is supposed to be a sweet moment, your characters are comforting each other…. God, OK, let’s just try and get this over with.”
Admittingly, when Jeff speaks, you aren’t even really listening. You’re trying your best to hide the fact that you’re elbowing Dylan behind your back, and he’s aggressively standing on your toes. The both of you are glaring at each other from the corners of your eyes, paying Jeff little attention.
“And, reset!” Jeff calls, the both of you getting back into position. Dylan seemingly can’t help himself, though, because he steps on your heel as you walk away from him. Fucking asshole. You curse him out in your head as you try to hide your wince and sit on Stiles’ bed. He just always has to have the last word. It’s fucking childish.
You’re not paying attention as Jeff continues to call to the crew, ready for a retake. Instead, you’re glaring straight ahead, and Dylan is glaring back. The tension between the two of you dissipates quickly as Jeff yells “Action!” though, and you pretend to be upset as tears fill your eyes. You sniffle and Dylan walks over, slowly sinking himself down next to you. There’s a palpable distance between the two of you, one that’s closing slowly as Dylan, in character, awkwardly shuffles towards you, fidgeting all the while.
“What are you doing?” your character asks, looking at Dylan (Stiles) with soft, furrowed brows.
“Uhhh,” he stutters, “I just—trying to comfort you?”
“Oh,” your character says. “Right. I’m OK, though. Sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize. It’s alright.”
There’s silence for a moment, enough to be considered a moment too long, one that makes the air awkward. You aren’t looking at Jeff but you assume he’s relatively pleased, although this isn’t the part you and Dylan have been struggling with. It’s coming up, though.
Your breath audibly halters as Dylan’s tender fingers brush your hair out of your face, tucking it behind you ear. His character is closer than you thought, as you turn to face him. His fingers are lingering in your hair, coming to hesitantly cup the side of your face as you meet his gaze. There’s barely even three centimeters between your faces, and your character's eyes are flicking down to his lips constantly, as though she can’t help herself.
“Can I…” Dylan‘s charachter trails off, gulping. “Can I—is it alright if I kiss—?”
You cut him off, quickly leaning in to place a peck on his lips.
“…You,” he breathes out, his eyes widened as he looks thoroughly perplexed.
Your character bites her lip, looking down at her hands before shooting up. “Sorry. I’m—I probably shouldn’t have done that. Sorry. I’ll go.” As quickly as you stand up, though, Dylan grabs your hand.
“Don’t be sorry,” he says, and when you turn around to face him his hands are cupping your cheeks again and you’re kissing. It’s gentle and soft until his finger tugs a strand of your hair, and then all of a sudden your hands are in Dylan’s hair roaming through them and tugging and, next thing you know, you’re tonguing and Dylan’s hand is wrapped around your throat.
“OK, cut!” Jeff screeches, and the two of you practically scramble away from each other. “What the hell, guys? You were doing so well until then. I just… Let’s take another five, I guess. No, actually, screw it, we’ll pick this back up tomorrow.”
Jeff storms off, and not only are you pissed at Dylan now, you’re ashamed. The both of you have been acting unprofessional all day, just because Dylan is a fucking child. If he gets you fired… You’re gonna kill him. Fucking murder him. Shit on his mutilated corpse.
Glaring at him, you shove his side as you storm off to go back to your trailer and calm down. You need to sleep because tomorrow is an early shoot and it’s already late, and now you probably won’t be able to because you’re pissed and stressed and worried.
Unfortunately for you, there’s a pattern of thudding footsteps on the ground before Dylan catches up to you. “Jesus, can you slow down?” he rasps. “What the hell did I even do now?”
“Are you fucking serious, O’Brien?” you whirl around, only to be met with him much closer than you anticipated. “I could get fired ‘cause of your immature ass.”
“Oh, my immature ass?” he scoffs. “Do you even hear yourself?”
With a roll of your eyes, you turn around and continue on your merry way to your trailer. You want to get away from Dylan, desperately, before you end up punching him, but he doesn’t seem to be getting the hint and is hot on your heels.
“You’re the one always calling me a dick and shit, insulting me, starting stuff. I mean, I have bruises on my back from you elbowing me just a minute ago.” You’re at your trailer now, after blocking out Dylan’s ranting in your ear, but you only just open the door before he continues, “What, you mad ‘cause no one else ever dishes back what you put out? Sorry not everyone just accepts your word as gospel, princess.”
“First of all, fuck you,” you spit. You’re giving him the attention and reaction he wants, but you don’t even care. You’re that pissed off. “Second of all, me, the princess? Holy shit, O’Brien, you’re delusional. You had a go at me today because I ate the last mac ‘n cheese, even though your name wasn’t on it. You think everything belongs to you because everybody loves you. News flash, it doesn’t, and they don’t. They just suck up to you because you’re a rich white guy with an army of teenage girls behind you.”
“Sounds like you’re just jealous to me,” Dylan shrugs, trying to pretend he’s unaffected but the stiffness in his shoulders is entirely obvious. “I mean, come on, let’s be honest here, you’re used to getting everything, to being the favourite, but the moment someone else gets attention you go fucking haywire. Or maybe you’re just in love with me. You say you hate me but, come on, everyone knows there’s a thin line between love and hate.”
“Me? Love you?” You scoff, laughing aggressively. “Only one of us choked the other as they shoved their tongue down their throat today.”
“Choked you?” Dylan snorts. “You wish. I merely placed my hand in the wrong place. It was an accident, Y/L/N. You know, like you.”
“Oh, good one. You really got me there, Dyl.” The sarcasm is practically oozing out of your every pore at this point. “And your hand was around my neck. How do you accidentally do that?”
“I was aiming for your other cheek, but you were tugging on my hair so much I could barely fucking see,” he retorts.
“Oh, sure. You were aiming for my cheek and you just accidentally slipped your hand right like this,” you say, sliding your hand around Dylan’s throat to demonstrate, lightly pushing him against the wall.
“Yeah, maybe like how you accidentally kept going like this,” Dylan says, his eyes narrowed into slits as he stares straight into yours, his fingers sliding through your hair before gripping and yanking.
“I hate you,” you breathe, your gazes re-aligning. The distance between the two of you is minimal at this point, and there’s an angry hornets nest in your stomach that you blame on your insatiable anger and hatred of this man in front of you.
“Fight me,” he spits, eyes boring into yours and not breaking contact for even a second.
“Oh, you wanna fight?” You challenge, mocking him.
“Fuck you,” he spits again, violently frustrated.
“Oh, you wanna fuck?” You were supposed to say it with a laugh, but the distance between the two of you is so small, and your voice sounds so quiet, and his eyes are looking at yours like that, and it suddenly sounds so reasonable… The two of you are kissing, but it doesn’t feel like kissing. It feels like more. It doesn’t start gentle and slow, like the ones you were doing for the camera earlier, it starts violent and angry as you communicate every ounce of hatred from one body to another.
Dylan’s foot juts out, his hands sliding down your body as he kicks the door to the trailer shut. Immediately, you push him up against the closed door, hands sliding into his hair as his hands come up to cup your cheeks with vigor.
“I knew you were into that,” he groans, smirking.
“Shut the fuck up,” you retort, forcing his head back down to yours so your lips can re-meet. His laugh cuts off into a moan as you pull his hair, and he suddenly flips the two of you around, parting your legs with his foot as his hands cup your ass.
The next day, you drag yourself into hair and makeup, ashamed. You know Sam, your makeup artist, is gonna want to kill you for all the goddamn hickies on your neck. Honest to god, it looks like you’ve just crawled out a leech-infested lake.
“Jesus Christ, girl,” Sam gasps as you take your usual seat. “You get mauled or something?”
The woman lifts your hair as she peers at your marked-up neck, assessing the damage. She seems more amused than pissed off, thankfully, but it does nothing to quell your embarrassment. You just hope you didn’t mark Dylan up as much as he did you, or else someone might just put the pieces together. You do not want people thinking your standards are low enough to sleep with him—they might think you’re some sex-crazed satanist if they know you fucked the devil last night.
“Yeah, something like that,” you sigh, irritation lining your tone. It just so happens that, at that moment, the trailer door opens and in comes Dylan. Your eyes meet immediately, just as they always have done when the two of you have found yourselves in the same room. You glare, but you find it’s half-hearted and, unlike usual, he looks away and goes over to his own seat, seemingly searching for something.
Huh.
“You gotta tell me who did this to you,” Sam whistles, still in shock, apparently. “Slip ‘em my number, maybe.”
You can’t see Dylan entirely, his back half-turned to you, but you see the corner of his lips turn up as he tries to suppress a smirk.
“You know what they say about guys who put on a show,” you shrug, eyes narrowed in Dylan’s direction. He’s pretending to search for his phone still, but you saw him slip it into his pocket already. Nosey fucker. “It’s a little somethin’ called overcompensation.”
Sam lets out a loud cackle, turning to grab something out of her bag, and Dylan, done with pretending to look for his phone, whirls his head around to give you a subtle glare and a raised eyebrow, a smug look on his face like he knows you’re lying. (Which you, very begrudgingly, have to admit to yourself that you are.)
You hate Dylan. Despise him, even. More than you’ve ever hated anyone; you can rationalize why last night happened easily enough. The amount of hatred and tension and the pressure from Jeff to get that scene right all blew up. That much emotion had to be exhausted somewhere, and, well, it was. It was a blip in the timeline, some kind of glitch in the matrix, but it happened and there’s an easy explanation. What there’s not an easy explanation for, however, is why you liked it so much. Why you’re lying, trying to pretend it wasn’t nearly as good as it was, trying to pretend you’re not still thinking about how it felt to kiss him and kiss him and kiss him… There is no logical explanation for that.
In fact, it’s entirely illogical, the mushy way you feel inside when you met his eyes, covered with a glare that you wish had half the hate in it that it normally does. It’s weird and it’s wrong, because you’re not supposed to have butterflies when you think of the way his hand had caressed your face, the way he ran his fingers through your hair, the way his arms felt, wrapped around you. You’re supposed to be revolted.
He’s smug and he’s pompous and you cannot stand him, let alone stand the thought of kissing him. And yet, although you hate the fact that the thought exists, you yearn for it. You find yourself excited, even, to go to set and get yelled at by Jeff because you simply cannot help yourselves when it comes to one another. You hate it, every second of it, every second of him. You think you hate him so much you might actually love him. And with the wink he sends over his shoulder as he leaves the trailer, eyes dark as they peer at the hickies Sam is frantically trying to cover up, you think he does, too.
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perenial · 10 months
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gene im so glad you said this cause I haven't seen anyone else comparing it to the book as source material for like character and tone but i am So sure that if terry was alive the season would not be like this but i fear good omens fans dont realise how big a factor the lack of terry's influence is?? or like they forget that good omens was never just neilman???
ok before i go any further: i rly don't want to detract from anyone's enjoyment of the season and everything im going to say comes from a place of love for a) the original novel (& season 1 to a certain extent bc it got me back into it lol) and b) tv as a medium so like peace and love on planet let people enjoy things etc etc
but
like u said, terry's influence on the book was enormous – what makes gomens gomens is the balance of his genuine warmth and precise understanding of humanity tempered with neilman's sardonic voice and general like.....savvy approach to storytelling? i guess u could call it? anyway what rly helps the book is that it took them years to write it, passing ideas back and forth and rewriting each other's work until their voices blended seamlessly and a well structured capital-s Story was created. when i praise the book for being self-contained i think a huge part of that comes from the circumstances in which it emerged: two authors with complementary styles writing in a v particular time period where they had both the space to play with their ideas and the constraints of the novel as a storytelling format from which to craft something extremely specific.
adaptations are a tricky business and a tv version of gomens produced literal decades after the book was always going to have some unique challenges, but i don't think that's a bad thing bc the challenges could prove to be creative opportunities to take both the established audience and those new to the story by surprise. my biggest hot take here is that i don't think translating a story into a different medium means it has to follow the original narrative exactly, bc each medium has its own ways of communicating information and these structures, rules and traditions in turn inform what that story is. what matters more than following a story beat-by-beat is capturing what that story is about at its core, what themes and messages and ideas it works through and how.
all this is to say i never expected tv gomens to be a perfect reproduction of the book and if it had it been, it probably would have been worse off for it. that being said, there are parts of the book – like u said, its tone and character – that needed to have some fidelity in order to pull it off, and for the most part s1 did that bc it was still working predominantly within the bounds of the novel & its core ideas. while i did have some issues w how neilman & amazon adapted some details and characterisations, i generally rly liked s1 – it reminded me of why i loved the book and it was just generally fun to watch.
s2 was. not that fun to watch
a few positives before i go ham w the critiques:
the hair & makeup + costumes were fantastic (although i feel like s1 was slightly better re: makeup?)
the sound design & score made some of the more awkward scenes bearable and thats no mean feat imo
david & michael gave incredible performances w what they were given – michael especially managed to salvage aziraphale enough that his complete 180 didnt feel completely tonally dissonant (more on this later)
the detail of the sets is NUTS and i genuinely want to see more of hell bc of how intricate and fun the props look
i actually like gabriel/beelzebub!! their getting together montage worked for me, although they could have spent sliiiightly more time establishing what it is they like abt each other so much + why gabriel wanted to stop armageddon 2.0 so suddenly
the opening scene, although not on par w the novel's & s1's, was visually gorgeous and thematically resonant (although neilman owes me royalties for ripping it off from this shitty fic i wrote back when raphael!crowley was all the rage lol)
now w THAT being said:
like i said yesterday, the pacing was fucking awful. flashbacks are hard to work w at the best of times and the way they were used in this season felt so needless, especially the 40s one in ep 4 that takes up like 90% of the episode. in both flashbacks + present day there were scenes that dragged for no real reason, dialogue that looped back around on itself to stretch out the runtime, and weirdly enough places where there should have been character & plot work where there just,, wasn't any?? for example, maggie & nina's night locked in the café – some parts of the dialogue in later episodes made out that they'd had some rly deep conversation abt how they feel about each other or even that they'd had an affair, but that isn't clear from those scenes in the café. i'm not saying we had to see that conversation in its entirety but that there needed to be more connective details – either in dialogue or direction – that gave that part of the story coherence.
(there were pacing issues w the editing too but i don't want to jump down the editor's throats on this one bc im more focused on writing & direction issues)
the second major problem that i mentioned in my tags yesterday is the protagonist shift, which is an issue that started in s1. aziraphale & crowley are side characters in book gomens – significant ones, yeah, but still somewhat peripheral to adam (& anathema who counts as a deuteragonist imo). this works incredibly well w who they are as characters: they're Just Some Guys who happen to be involved in this epic biblical-level bureaucratic nightmare and importantly, they don't want to be in the spotlight. the arrangement was created so that they could explore what it meant to be themselves away from the Big Narrative; literally any time they get involved in larger affairs is bc the plot is alive and caught them unionising on company time. the last fucking chapter is adam (& god) being like haha u guys are alright keep it sleezy and letting them go. like. hello. neil u let them go.
but then!! tv gomens s1 does something interesting at the end w the body swapping addition that i dont totally hate – it gives aziraphale & crowley the extra bit of character work that brings them slightly more adjacent to their book selves. see i kinda view tv a/c as the younger, less settled versions of book a/c; they're still caught up in the immediacy of being key players and haven't fully realised that earth is their home. i haven't watched s1 in a while but one scene i remember rly clearly is crowley throwing all those astronomy texts in the air and angsting abt when he was an angel; i remember it bc his anguish in that scene feels a lot newer and rawer than book crowley's feelings about falling. when tv a/c do their bodyswap, it gives them the chance to land a blow against heaven/hell in a way that solidifies their allegiance to earth in a way that more closely resembles what book a/c have been abt the entire time (still adjacent, though. not parallel).
the reason why this works is that it does one final pivot to orient aziraphale and crowley as almost-main characters in a manner that makes sense in relation to a) their book selves and b) the position the tv show has placed them in. a combination of factors made tv a/c feel a lot less mature than their book counterparts but at the end of s1 they're sort of facing the same direction the book ended in, albeit through their own flashy late 2010s means.
when s2 was announced i was.......apprehensive bc to me, that felt like a satisfactory ending. i get the impression that amazon saw how wildly successful the adaptation was and was like oh shit we could make way more money out of this and neilman, having all those undead darlings that he and terry killed in the process of whittling the book into a workable novel, jumped at the chance to resurrect all those half-realised ideas. but not only were those ideas probably discarded for a reason, they've either been laying in wait for years unworked or they're new inventions, which means they weren't molded in the way that the book had been. like i said before, book gomens underwent years of rewrites and creative collaboration, and i think that process was what made it so good; s2 didn't have that. even if some of terry's ideas made it into s2, his influence is still missing bc he and neilman weren't in dialogue the same way they were in the book (and in some ways s1 bc i know terry was involved in the process of adapting gomens to screen before his death).
i don't think it's a case of newer fans forgetting terry so much as it is the context of terry's involvement being so removed from the current circumstances that certain aspects & discourses (i.e. is the s2 finale queerbaiting (no), does binge watching change the viewership experience (yes), etc etc) about the show overshadow other discussions that would usually be taking place. and before anyone says it's a case of neilman forgetting terry, i definitely don't think it's that either bc thats. yknow. wildly disrespectful. but also there are larger systems and structures at play than one writer no matter how much beef i have w him and his decisions, bc ultimately he's just one guy (a powerful and wealthy guy, but just a guy) and there's a wider cultural shift happening rn towards rehashing old stories without understanding what made them successful in the first place, and that same culture just doesn't allow for much, if any, constructive discourse analysis
so yeah
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kyo-kris · 1 month
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Shigaraki Tomura x FTM Reader HEADCANONS
❥ Telling him that you're trans
Fluffy Headcanons.
Pronouns for reader: he/him
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♡ You and him were having a chemistry, even if both never would dare to talk about this, and no one from L.o.V (except for Toga. Im sure she would shipp you and Tomura)
♡ Well, but when you noticed that you were liking him, you got nervous. So. Fucking. Nervous. You didn't know that they had a trans member in L.o.V and you were afraid of being just rejected or humiliated because of your gender.
♡ Well, you decided one night to open up to Twice about your gender, you were fucking SHAKING. Ending up discovering the trans member and that nobody gives a damn for what you identify yourself, as long as you are strong and help them, you will be respected.
➥ (If you don't like Twice, just imagine another member or you discovering by yourself that information) (pls who doesn't like him...)
♡ This information just relaxed you so much, and you just felt safe to talk about it to Shigaraki. But now how would you do it was the problem. He was always busy with his plans.
♡ But one day, you found your chance. Only him in living room, the others were outside doing different things. Doesn't matters. You took the advantage and courage (of course the courage of a few months thinking about this).
♡ You wasn't totally surprise because you knew about the member, but you hadn't seem any expression so genuinely like this. People tries to support or show that they support you, or they treat you differently (most time in a bad way). But this pookie? Nah. He was just "ok, and?"
♡ "W-what do you mean with 'ok, and?', you already knew it??" you asked with wide eyes, but at the same time you were so greatful for him not turn this a headache.
♡ "No? I mean, good for you, I'll keep calling you the same way as I always did." He said, same expression as if you just told him that you were going to sleep or something like that.
♡ "Thanks. I always feel like if I don't tell, the person will be mad or feel trapped. It happens more than I wish"
♡ "Trapped? What the fuck. Why would I?" You didn't know if was a rhetorical question or you had to answer it, but you just let a light laugh come out.
♡ "Is that all the reason you wanted to tell me you are trans?" He seemed to notice your nervous face.
♡ "Do you... Do you wanna go out with me sometime?" You felt your cheek burning like a fire "y-you don't have to accept, I was just wondering maybe we.. Uhm could-"
♡ "Yes" He coldly (or softly. You were too nervous to notice) said, turning his head away from your look.
♡ "What?" You heard it right?
♡ "Don't make me repeat myself" You thought maybe he was annoyed or impatient, but it wasn't, he was blushing as hell. And when you noticed, you made your way to tease
♡ "Whoa you're so red. Are you running a fever?" You tried your best to hold back your laugh
♡ "Im changing my mind!" His voice was slightly shaking, and you also noticed that, but decided to keep to yourself. It was just so cute seeing him like this!
♥︎ You could see a short smile on his face. Maybe you didn't need to be nervous at all. Everything went right.
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Notes from Kyo ♡: Hello again! Well, my "I wanna feel safe and loved" is here, isn't? Two fluffy posts and the same character XD. Now you can suggest anything on my blog, can be anonymous too, feel free.
Here a list about what I do and what I don't:
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blindmagdalena · 4 months
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Ok, so that ask about the big thighs save lives got me thinking. Imagine hanging out with our bby boy, turning to him, and asking why he likes you or why he loves you. Would he be able to genuinely answer, or would it be bull shit
it certainly wouldn't be bullshit, but Homelander doesn't necessarily have the self-awareness to be able to answer that. he doesn't know how to articulate the security you've brought into his life, the vicious possessiveness he feels over it, or the bone deep, choking fear he has of ever losing it. he would answer as honestly as he knew how to, though.
the standard of course would be a slight laugh and, "Uhhhh, beeeecause... I'm attracted to you? You're hot as hell. You do that thing with your tongue," he says while wiggling his finger.
if you pushed for something more sentimental, he'd start to list the things he likes. largely it would be centered on him.
when he says, "I like the way you touch me." what he means is that you touch him like you want to. there's no hidden tension in your body that tells him you're just waiting to let go. you hold him like you never want to let him go.
when he says, "I like the way you make me feel." he means you make him feel safe. desired. whole.
when he says, "I like you." he means exactly that. all of you. your smell, your taste, the fit of you in his arms.
"I like who I am with you." because when you look at him, you see the hero he has always wanted to be.
"Because you love me."
being a hero was his destiny, but it was being loved that was his dream.
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thatfilthyanimal · 4 months
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tw: stalking, grooming, pedophilia, sexual abuse, past suicidal thoughts
I've recently been made aware that Dupsy is still talking about me and is now going to random Megamind fans that don't know me and telling them to avoid me. I'm also aware that they're doing this in the Ruby Gillman fandom. I have no words to really describe the level of discomfort this brings me, but I will attempt.
First of all, all the "grooming" allegations were thoroughly debunked and proven to be bullshit. I can't believe I have to even say this. I'm a victim of grooming and sexual abuse myself. It's extremely traumatic and life-altering shit, and never something I would want to inflict on someone else. I feel like it should be obvious, with the measures I took in the server to ensure no child is exposed to such things. I was recently diagnosed with PTSD due to the shit that happened to me when I was growing up, and between processing that in therapy sessions and stomaching transitioning in a near-constant hostile-to-trans-people online social media hellscape, I am tired.
I love Megamind, more than anything, and this is known and obvious to anyone who's met me. This movie saved my life when I was extremely suicidal and planning to end my life back in 2010. Watching the movie when I did gave me something to focus on, a distraction, and a responsibility as a fandom member that helped distract me long enough to get out of the planning mindset I was in. Had I not seen the movie, I do not think I would have stuck around. I will leave it at that.
And moderating fandom spaces for Megamind has been lovely! I adore this fandom. The people in it are extremely talented and sweet, and just so damn nice, like by default. I say this all the time but I've never experienced another fandom space quite like it. There are usually bad eggs in fandoms, and perhaps -I- am said "bad egg" to some, but genuinely this one is special. I have always felt that way, even when the bad eggs show up and make a stink. It has always felt worth being here for, to me.
And while I hate to give Dupsy the satisfaction of knowing they hurt me, I need to be honest-- it's been rough. I stopped talking in my server, I locked up on most of my friends and stopped talking even in DMs. I still struggle with severe anxiety in the server and have talked to Dal on various occasions about transferring the server ownership to him. He's been very patient with my freakouts and super understanding, but it's still hard. This WAS a place I felt safe, for over ten years! And now it feels like any minor can just say I'm a groomer or a pedo or whatever with ZERO consequences, just because they're mad, just because these are words that make people go "oh shit" and listen, and man! It's not ok! And this coupled with the fact that trans people are often called groomers just for existing, just… man! I'm tired. I'm so tired.
There are real, severe, damaging effects to these claims being thrown around so casually. It's hurtful to me, as a victim of sexual abuse, because when I came forward to people about what happened when -I- was a minor, I was told I "wanted it" and "asked for it". It was made to be my fault that I was abused, and I internalized it for years. It nearly killed me. I cannot stress enough how important it is to not use claims like pedophilia and grooming so lightly-- these are VERY damning terms to use on people and should be reserved for people ACTUALLY HARMING OTHERS. Being mad I banned you from the server is not "abuse" and using my Customer Service Voice to be nice to you and then being obviously tired of you when you were banned is not "emotional grooming". What the actual fuck. ALSO. This was well over a year ago! Why am I still having to post about this? Why are you still TALKING about me? And yet again I ask, where the HELL are your parents?
Anyway, if you've been wondering why I've been so quiet these days and struggling to socialize… honestly? It's this. I hate that this is what did it. I know people trust and believe me, I know the fandom backs me up regularly and I appreciate them all so much for it. I see it, but I never know how to respond. You guys continue to make this fandom feel safe for me even when my entire brain is screaming to run, and I appreciate you so much for it.
Kids deserve to be trusted when they tell people they've been hurt and I hate that the recent proshipping discourse or whatever you want to call it, this culty all-or-nothing shit, has a bunch of minors growing up feeling like EVERYTHING is something to call rapey or predatory, with apparently little room to distinguish when REAL abuse is happening to them. I don't blame anyone for believing Dupsy, and it's honestly better they DO believe all unproven claims of abuse by default, just to stay safe-- but man, it has consequences that follow people, and really should not be a thing to just throw around because you're mad at someone. I just can't believe they're STILL going around and reaching out to strangers telling them to avoid me… like, what the fuck.
I will be ok, I always am eventually, but I needed to say something, because it's honestly been a while since I've said much of anything.
Keep being kind. <3
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hoebiirama · 9 months
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✑ Anonymous sent : "Hey, Anli! I hope you're doing well <3 if ok with you, can I request some hcs for Madara and Tobirama with a fem friend who has Kamado Tanjiro's personality (from Kimetsu no Yaiba tho if you haven't watch it yet then someone who's just really kind, innocent in some way and respectful) some friendship hcs would be interesting. Thank you in advance if you accept my request! Take care 💙" ✑ Anli's useless comment : I am indeed unfamiliar with Kimetsu no Yaiba so I went off of the description you gave me, so I apologize if I didn't go in depth enough ! 😭😖 Thank you so much for requesting though 💚
Masterpost | Rules | Send a request | Works in Progress
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うちはマダラ • Uchiha Madara
SFW
↳ Madara would be concerned for you. I don't think he sees all types of kindness as weakness (showing mercy to your opponent is the type of "kindness" he considers weak), but in your case, it's different. The fact that you always assume the best in people deeply unsettles him, and he's always worried that someone will take advantage of you one day because you're too friendly. Your willingness to help others is both your strongest and weakest asset. He doesn't like that.
↳ I feel like he would scold you like a strict dad. A lot. Because he grew up being told to constantly hide his emotions, he never learned how to properly express them, so it often comes out as anger or frustration. Is the scolding annoying ? Yes. Do you understand why he's like this ? Also yes. You wouldn't have a problem telling him off, but this man invented the concept of being stubborn, so your words would have virtually no effect on him.
↳ It's a different story entirely when that kindness is directed towards him. Madara is used to people feeling extremely intimidated by him, never looking him in the eye, never approaching him unless it's absolutely necessary, and being overly polite out of cautiousness and fear of summoning his wrath. And I feel like your kindness and positive attitude towards life would both feel like a breath of fresh air and very unnerving (definitely at first). He probably wouldn't know how to deal with that.
↳ But that's also the reason he came to care about you, because no matter how much of an asshole he was to you at first, you never reciprocated the sentiment. You were always nice to him. You never took anything he said personally because you understood why he was so guarded all the time and that alone was enough to make you special in his eyes. Madara has never received any form of empathy from someone other than his brother.
↳ Your kindness is pure, and he would feel it. You're not nice to him out of caution. You don't show him respect because you fear him. It's genuine. It's something you can't fake. And while he'd definitely be thrown off at first, he'd warm up to you and eventually come to deeply care about you, even if he has strange ways of showing it.
↳ What I'm saying is, Madara is biased. Showing him kindness and openness is fine. Encouraged, even. But towards others ? Hell no. That won't pass. And yes, it is partly due to his possessiveness. Because if you think that's just something he'd display with his s/o, you'd be deadly wrong. Whether you're his friend or his lover, you're still his, period. He'd be able to put up with it without too much complaining if it's with Hashirama, but with strangers and Tobirama especially, he won't stop himself from making some kind of comment about how they (read : Tobirama) don't deserve you being nice to them.
↳ Pro tip : a good way to shut him up if he starts lecturing you again is to tease him a little and tell him "well, I have you to protect me, don't I ? Why should I worry about these things when you're there ?" and his brain might just stop working for a hot minute, lol.
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千住扉間 • Senju Tobirama
SFW
↳ I feel like Tobirama would share some similarities with Madara, but not even nearly to the same degree. He'd also be a lot more comfortable expressing his feelings through words, so he wouldn't get frustrated the way Madara would. It's just that sometimes he thinks you're being too trusting with people you should absolutely be wary of, or going too soft on people who don't deserve it.
↳ Thankfully, Tobirama is always ready to defend you from anyone who tries to imply that you're naive or easy to manipulate, because he knows it's far from the truth. You're no pushover; unfortunately, in the world you live in, it is often seen as a bad thing to be kind. Tobirama would have no qualms telling people off for you if need be, and by that I mean that even if you can stand up for yourself, you're not as harsh on people as he thinks is necessary, so he takes it upon himself to finish the job, lol.
↳ This one is obvious but I still have to say it : he'd also absolutely hate seeing you being friendly with Madara. I feel like all of the concerns Madara has in general would apply to Tobirama in this specific scenario. He'd be worried sick that the man would end up hurting you in one way or another (he feels the same way about Hashirama's friendship with Madara). Tobirama knows better than to straight up just tell you to stop talking to him, but if he catches you with Madara, he'd probably find any excuse to pull you away from him.
↳ Your friendliness and kindness also reminds him of his brother, and he'd definitely have a soft spot for it. I feel like he'd ask you a lot of questions to try and figure out why you're this way and how the world you live in hasn't seemed to completely ruin your innocence. It would be such a wild concept to him, and as the curious mind he is, he'd definitely try to understand your point of view.
↳ He would definitely come to you for personal advice if you're close enough. You'd be easier to trust than most people and not as biased as Hashirama would be (and, let's face it, if Tobirama comes to you with a personal problem, 99% of the time Hashirama is somehow involved in it), and you'd likely be one of the few people who could make him genuinely laugh. (Making him smile is easy enough. Just look at any picture of him with his students when they were children. Or how he was looking at Sasuke while fighting alongside him during the war. Man's not as stoic as people think he is — but you have a better chance at beating him in a footrace than you have at making him laugh.)
↳ Tobirama would love having you around, tbh. You're not as blindly optimistic as his brother is, but you're still the kind of positive presence he desperately needs in his life. He wouldn't fear negative judgement from you, and he knows you always mean well. You're probably the only person he can talk to about his students who'll get just as hyped as he is and not make some comment about how it's "unlike him to be so soft" and ruin the moment.
↳ 12/10 friendship, would recommend. For his sake. Please. The poor man desperately needs a friend.
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namwool · 3 months
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genuine question: if corporal punishment was a common thing in ancient times, doesn't that justify qjl's treatment of sj too? slavery was normal at the time, after all
It physically pains me to answer this question. But yes.
While I dislike QJL's greatly to the point that it makes me want to strangle him, chop off his dick, shove it down his throat and make him shit his own balls, the historical context is important to understand why he was 'entitled' to abuse SJ.
We, modern people, who live differently from our great-great-great ancestors, in different times with different values, one in which we're taught that beating someone is wrong, is different from the beliefs of people from thousands of years ago.
Take for instance ancient Egypt, the Roman Empire etc. Owning slaves back then was the norm. If you were to ask a civilian of those empires, they wouldn't dwell too much on the morality of owning slaves. They wouldn't see anything wrong with it. Because it easied their work.
And if one group defeated another, it was a normal practice to enslave the defeated.
Back then, abuse and slavery were considered to be as natural as breathing. Just like slavery was prominent, so was domestic abuse.
Does this make it ok? No.
My parents lived through a period of time were corporeal punishments were a must-have in schools. Whenever they recount their times, telling me how school operated back them, I am always left speechless and horrified.
In my mind, the only one allowed to lift a hand on me is my mother. And that's it.
However, I have noticed the inconsistent views my parents have about teachers hitting students.
When they talk about their school years, recounting how severe and strict their teachers were, they dont view it as sever as I see it.
And that's where the conflicting views lie.
If a teacher ever lifted a hand on me, my mom would have brought hell on earth, but, at the same time, she doesn't think her teachers had been wrong when using a stick to strike the student's palm for not doing homework.
YQY and SJ himself, despite having experienced slavery, dont address it as much. Which is a clear indicator that they too believe it to be normal. Not even SY, someone who came from the 'modern' world, seems to be affect by the concept of slavery. Let's remember that while exploring SJ's memories he said something along the lines of seeing a live action of a murder, not once addressing the severe abuse SJ suffered at the hands of QJL.
Am I saying that slavery and abuse are normal?
Fuck no.
No one deserves to be beaten up. Shen Jiu didn't deserve the beatings, nor did Luo Binghe, nor anyone else.
Slavery is a disgusting practice, which deserves to be punished accordingly. Slavery ruined many people's livelihood, and caused generational trauma. And we see that with Shen Jiu as well, whose personal trauma ended up affecting LBH as well.
However, if people are going to excuse LBH's inhumane behavior, torture and savage dismemberment of SJ, turning him into a limbless state, I might as well excuse SJ's abuse toward LBH, while totally ignoring QJL's existance.
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blissxjj · 6 months
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Another idea struck me… (I apologise if I’m being too selfish- please ignore the request or take your time, just don’t feel pressured because of me 😭)
Satan x MC who is… nice. Genuinely, without any ulterior motives. They like being that because of being brought up in a strict household. Even though he’s knowledgeable, Satan has always met humans with hidden goals or fake niceness like his own facade. He thought MC was doing the same, even after a few weeks in, he can’t find much that annoys them which might be weird for him. So how would he react when he finds out: MC simply likes being obedient to their friends (and Satan 👀) and family since they don’t like arguing much, if ever
I love how your requests are so detailed and complex love a challenge :3
Here it is <3
Satan X Nice Obedient MC
Satan
Satan always thought there was something fishy about you
Cause there is no WAY! you are this nice and good, every time you get in trouble and Lucifer starts scolding you about it and it turns to an argument going back and forth between you
Satan stands back and waits for you to drop that facade and show your true colors but it never happens
Even if you were right and Lucifer was wrong the argument always ends with Lucifer's final word and your nodding
"That's enough MC go to your room and complete your chores"
"But i am sick i am not a demon us humans get weak when we-"
"I don't want to hear it MC go and do your work"
"Yes Lucifer"
What in hell did he just witness!!??
You just went to your room and did exactly what Lucifer told you to do even though you were sick and needed to rest
He went after you to your room and asked
"How do you stand him ordering you around MC?"
"I just don't think about it besides my family does the same" you said while cleaning your room
"What do you mean?" He asked
"I grew up in a strict household and my mom/dad's commands aren't any diffrent from Lucifer's" you shot him a smile and went back to work
Satan just can't stand when Lucifer talks to you like that and he doesn't like it when you listen to him all the time
"Say MC why don't i do your chores and you just rest" Satan offered
"Umm...no it's ok i got it and it's not your work to do" you said
"I insist let me at least help you a little bit" you said
"No i got it i am ok Satan thank you" you declined again
"SERIOUSLY LET ME F HELP YOU! YOU ARE SICK YOU NEED TO REST" Satan blew up in your face and you backed away against a wall
He sighed and apologized
"I am sorry MC it's just that i want you to stop obeying others all the time sometimes you need to go against them in order to help yourself"
"Satan i don't think you are doing this because of that" you said stalking towards him slowly
"Yes i am" Satan said
You put your hand flat on his chest backing him against the wall and said
"You don't want me to stop 'Obeying'
you want me to obey you instead"
Satan's eyes widen and his cheeks started turning red
"What? No i was just looking out for you" he said nervously
You get closer to his face and he closed his eyes waiting for your lips to touch his but soon heard your laugh
"Hahaha i can't kiss you you will get sick too now get up and help me clean so we can cuddle" you said picking up a card cardboard box and walked out the room
Satan was stunned he was happy to meet a human who is genuinely nice and well raised but today he knew you had a side to you a side only he can make you reveal a dominant side that is.
Masterlist
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