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tarotsoul · 5 months ago
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Ghost in the Wind — Part One
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SUMMARY: All your life, your presence had been nothing more than a faint kiss of a breeze—nothing impactful, nothing worth noticing. So why did it hurt so much when that remained the case after moving to Prythian?
WARNINGS: a bit of angst, feelings of self-hatred and worthlessness, brief mentions of sexual assault
WORD COUNT: 3.8k
Series Masterlist
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“No.”
There was no room for argument in Nesta’s tone, no room for anything other than agreement or else she’d reign the Hells on all of them. Her mate be damned, she would not leave the mortal lands without you. Not again.
“If we take her,” Cassian gritted his teeth, “I am inviting her husband to wage war on our kind if he so chooses.”
Nesta bared her teeth. “Rafe is nothing but a coward and a sorry excuse of a man. What kind of war could he wage? If she stays, then so do I.”
Cassian blanched at his mate, his teeth grinding. They were only supposed to have stopped through for no more than a week, to ensure things in the mortal lands were restoring to somewhat of the normalcy they once had before the war.
He blinked at Nesta, noting the way she bore her feet into the solid ground, as if planting herself there like a tree weaving its roots into the soil. He knew the love she had for her cousin, her only friend, as she’d once told him. The guilt she’d felt when she first left the village, left you, hadn’t eased in the slightest.
Perhaps this was the reason she insisted on joining Cassian on this third-grade mission. He cast a quick glance over her shoulder to the small stone house you were occupying, and closed his eyes to ground his breathing.
“We can’t just bring her back without consulting Rhys first.”
Nesta rolled her eyes. “Screw Rhys. I’ll deal with him myself if I have to. She is my family, Cassian. My friend. Every night, he beats her and abuses her and takes from her what she will not willingly give. She is coming back with us.”
Cassian took another grounding breath, the iron will in Nesta’s eyes granting not even a fraction of negotiation. There was too much going on right now, too much to sift through to rebuild their city and legions.
But Nesta was right, and despite not knowing you, he couldn’t stomach the idea of leaving a vulnerable soul with a monster who took and abused like Rafe did. Especially not when he saw the pain on his mate's eyes for her cousin.
“Ten minutes. Tell her to pack necessities only. We will need to leave within the hour if we wish to be gone before her husband returns.”
Nesta didn’t cast him a second glance as she turned and sprinted into your home. You scrambled back from the window, heat painting your cheeks that you’d been caught watching them, straining your ears for a sliver of their conversation, to no avail.
She said nothing of your snooping, only grabbed your hand and dragged you to your sleeping chambers. “Pack only what you need. You’re coming back with us.”
You blinked, lungs seizing the air you tried to breathe. Leaving? For the Fae lands?
“Ness,” you tried, but she held up a slender hand to cut you off.
“Don’t. I made the mistake of leaving you behind before. I won’t do it again.” She couldn’t look at you. Not at the bruises marring your skin, or the split lip you’d earned yourself two nights ago for leaving an unwashed pot in the sink.
So you didn’t think twice about the consequences of being caught fleeing. You didn’t think twice at all as you stuffed minimal clothing into a satchel along with a photo of your beloved mother and the worn journal you kept hidden beneath the mattress.
Nesta allowed you a moment to compose yourself as she returned to her mate just outside your home. Home. As if you could ever have truly referred to it as that. This was not a home. You hadn’t had a home since your mother passed ten years ago. Since you married Rafe and your whole world fell apart.
You had prayed. Prayed to whatever out there that would listen. Hoped and hoped that one day your salvation would arrive, that you’d be finally spared from the misery you’d been subjected to for so long. From the pain and terror and loneliness.
You hadn’t realised you were absentmindedly twisting the iron band on your ring finger until the small stone in the centre scratched at your skin. That Gods damned ring that bound you to the monster you called your husband. That iron cage that kept you as his possession instead of his love.
Yet the fear… the fear at the idea of removing it sat far too heavy in your chest. The fear of him finding you, punishing you. But he wouldn’t find you, you knew that. Rafe would never dream of crossing that veil into the Fae lands. And even if he did, you were sure he’d be eaten alive within the first breath he took in that world.
When you met Nesta and Cassian outside, they both had a satchel of their own on their shoulders; stuffed to the brim of bread and cheese and skins of water they’d raided from the kitchen.
The General nodded at you once as you approached. You wondered if you’d done anything to offend him, or perhaps he found this—you—to be an unnecessary burden to him and his day.
“Thank you,” you managed to utter, and both he and Nesta felt the pure relief and gratitude in your voice.
Cassian’s resolve softened, a sympathetic gleam in his eye and he hated himself for a moment for even considering leaving you here alone.
“It’ll take us half a day to reach the wall,” Nesta began, unmoving from Cassian’s side. “When we pass, Azriel will meet us at the border in Spring. Cassian cannot fly the both of us.”
You couldn’t help the apology that slithered up your throat. “I don’t mean to be a burden—“
But it was Cassian who growled in response, “You are not. You are family, and we don’t leave family behind.”
You walked for hours, legs sore and tired and throbbing from the stamina you lacked. But you didn’t want to stop, to ask for a break. They were kind enough to have brought you, you needn’t add any more time onto their already long journey.
So you kept your mouth shut and willed your legs to move, one in front of the other. Hours passed and you could feel that familiar panic rise in your stomach. Nightfall was approaching, which meant Rafe would surely be home by now…
You didn’t want to allow yourself to think of that. Of what he was doing after finding the home empty with nothing but your wedding band on the dresser, the only proof you ever even existed in that house.
It was Cassian who made the call to stop for a break, as though only now remembering how weak a mortal body was compared to a Fae’s—or in his case, an Illyrian.
Nesta had told you many things about her family in Prythian; the members of the Inner Circle, the beautiful city of Velaris and all the wonders it had to offer. Despite the relief you felt for leaving, the anxiety of entering the Fae lands was unmatched to anything you’d felt before.
You rested for only thirty minutes, the three of you eating your way through an entire satchel of food and two skins of water. Perhaps Nesta and Cassian were as tired as you were, though you figured not.
And by the time you reached the wall, night had surrounded you in complete darkness, nothing but a ripple in the air to suggest you had met the end of your homelands.
It was opaque for the most part, but the air seemed to glimmer and fold, as if you were looking magic dead in its face. You allowed your fingers to reach shakily for it, a fearful thought stopping you from making contact.
You turned to your cousin. “Will it hurt?”
She took your hand. “No, though when we pass through you’ll need to stay as close to Cassian and I as possible. Your scent—it’ll be a beacon to all sorts of creatures that roam freely within the Spring.”
Nesta shrugged off her jacket and handed it to you. “It’ll somewhat mask your scent. Just long enough until we meet with Azriel.”
You shoved your arms in the jacket as you put it on over your own and took Nesta’s hand again. Her eyes met yours, something akin to relief and sorrow flickering in her gaze. You didn’t want her pity. And it cleaved your heart into two knowing that you could never do anything to repay her for this, to express just how far your gratitude stretched.
Cassian and Nesta took three steps forward and as you followed, the air rippled around you…you breathed in the new life and second chance you’d been given.
But nothing could have prepared you for what awaited on the other side of the veil.
The first and only thing you saw were a set of sharp, gleaming white teeth before you were shoved to the ground with a hard thud, your head hitting against soft grass with a thump.
Snarls and grunts and shrieks surrounded you, and in the time it took to regain your bearings, Cassian and Nesta were sheathing their daggers once more as the…thing that had attacked lay dead on a field of daisies.
With eerie calmness, you assessed the creature. It was huge, twice the size of Cassian and about four times the size of you. Dark black fur covered its body and ruby red eyes that lifelessly stared into your very soul.
For some strange, obscene reason, you couldn’t bring yourself to look away. Not as you breathed in the fresh soil beneath your feet. It felt as though your world had been turned on his axis, as if only now could you see clearly.
Then you heard it, a distant swooshing in the wind. You angled your neck toward the noise, eyes not needing to squint in the darkness as the stars illuminated the sky so beautifully.
Your brows furrowed, but you did not look away. “Something is coming.”
Both Nesta and Cassian followed your gaze then, stepping closer to your still body. The figure came closer, your initial thoughts of it being a large bird being dismissed as a pair of wings much like Cassian’s, only larger, flipped through the midnight air.
You smelt him before catching his face. Pine and wood and parchment. Mint. There was a hint of mint and something sweet like cinnamon as the glorious Illyrian landed swiftly onto the grass.
Azriel.
You remembered him, the Shadowsinger. Silver streaks of the moon casted across his brown skin as he approached swiftly, those dark and languid shadows moving across his form and snaking the earth until they halted at your feet—assessing.
“So glad you finally joined the party.” Cassian said in greeting, though Azriel paid no mind to the tone his brother offered.
Those shadows wrapped around your ankles softly, slinking your skin as they felt you out. You felt something then, a tug in the air that seemed to pull the shadows back to Azriel’s towering form.
That was when you looked at him, breath stolen from your lungs. He was beautiful. A warrior, that you could tell. Solid muscle covered every inch of him, dark black hair that sat messily on his head and swept down his forehead and brows. Hazel eyes met yours, his lips parting��no doubt at the state of your bruised face.
He was beautiful when you’d seen him previously on his brief visit to speak with Lucien… but now, it was as though you were seeing him truly–with so much clarity in your gaze it almost blinded you. Everything about this land did. 
“There are more coming, so unless you want a fight, I suggest we leave.”
His tone held no room for argument, yet he spoke in an unrushed drawl, as if these creatures were the least of his concern. He was as large as Cassian, daggers strapped to his leathers, so you supposed they likely posed little to no threat to him and his skills.
“Can you winnow?” Nesta asked.
It wasn’t lost on you how overlooked you were, despite being the reason for his presence. But like most of your life, it came as no surprise to be somewhat invisible. Cast aside. Unnoticed.
Azriel shook his head. “We’ll need to fly to the border between Autumn and Winter, from there I can winnow us back to Velaris.”
Cassian nodded, reaching for Nesta. “We’ll go first, make sure the area is safe. Follow us in five minutes.”
Nesta looked at you, a silent conversation between you both.
You’ll be okay?
I’ll be fine. If you trust Azriel then so do I.
No other words were exchanged when Cassian hauled Nesta into his arms, spread his magnificent wings and shot to the skies. You watched until they were a mere dot beside the stars before returning your attention to the Shadowsinger who was already offering you his.
“It’s nice to see you again, Y/N.” He said politely.
You wondered if he’d remembered your name from your first and last encounter almost a year ago, or if when Cassian sent word for aid he’d reminded him of it.
Either way, you offered a timid smile. “You too, Azriel. I apologise for troubling you with this. All of you.”
He shook your apology off. “It’s no bother. Are you hurt anywhere?”
You knew he wasn’t referring to bruises and cuts you already adorned. It seemed as though stepping through that veil gave you more clarity, more understanding of silent thoughts and everything else around you.
You shook your head. “No.”
“Good.” He nodded, and those shadows threatened to reach for your ankles again.
Azriel didn’t pull them back this time, only took a tentative step closer. “I apologise, they’re no threat. Not to you.”
You nodded, gaze upon them as they slinked further up your body and wrapped softly around your arms. Azriel almost bristled at the way you remained so calm. He wondered how much about him and his family you knew. He supposed Nesta had told you much through letters and such.
You didn’t reply, couldn’t bring yourself. You knew how deadly the Inner Circle could be to their enemies. And yet these shadows touched you with more softness than your husband ever did. You didn’t let that thought show on your face.
“Everything feels different on this side of the wall,” you admitted, a little breathless.
Azriel remained looking at you. “Everything feels…clearer.”
You waved the shadows off your body gently, silently shooing them back to their master.
“I’ll need to fly you like Cassian did to Nesta,” he began. “Are you afraid of heights?”
You didn’t know the answer to that. But the thought of being held by him the same way Nesta was by Cassian… that thought scared you. And not because it was Azriel, but because of the sheer closeness and intimacy that was needed for it.
You swallowed it down. “No… I don’t think so.”
He nodded, taking another step closer with an outstretched hand. “You can close your eyes if you wish, and I’ll fly slowly, I swear.”
You heard it then, the pattering of paws on the grass, of claws digging into the soil and snarls of breath into the night. You looked to Azriel, eyes a little wilder than before. He nodded, as if he already knew what you were about to say.
He held out his hand further for you to take, and you took a hold of his marred skin, calloused under your softer palm but you didn’t balk, didn’t pull away as you got a clearer view of the scars that adorned him.
Azriel hoisted you into his arms, cradling you to his chest. “The take off will be harsh, make sure you hold on tight to me.”
And he wasn’t lying. Azriel bent his knees and shoved his full weight into the earth before you both shot into the starlit skies. You didn’t close your eyes, you wanted to see everything this world had to offer. A world that was always at your fingertips but never accessible until now.
The wind seemed to whisper to you, gently caressing your bruised skin and promising a better life. A new life. As though the elements welcomed you home. 
It was only moments of uphill force until Azriel evened out and began a steady speed through the clouds. His scent enveloped you, almost overbearing as it encompassed all of your senses.
You worried for a moment then. If his scent surrounded you this way, you wondered how badly yours did to him with such heightened senses. You tried to hold your breath for longer than usual, tried to steady your heartbeat, afraid he’d hear it.
“Are you okay?” He murmured against the shell of your ear. Because even though you tried to mask it, he could sense your every feeling, your every tremor and sigh and sob.
Tears streamed down your face as he flew you both north toward the border between Autumn and Winter.
“Thank you, Azriel.” And you thanked him and thanked him and thanked him. Until your voice grew hoarse from the sobs and you let yourself realise that you were finally free.
Finally safe. 
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In the transitioning week of being escorted to the Night Court, you had hardly spoken to a soul. For the first two days, you appreciated the silence, the safety–basked in it, even. Nesta had shown you to your room in the House of Wind, an incredible home built into the walls of a large mountain that overlooked the city of Velaris. 
“Should you need anything,” Nesta had said softly, “ask the House, it listens.” 
And she had been right. The first night, you thought of a hot bubble bath and a gentle breeze had sifted through your sheer curtains, guiding you to your personal bathing chambers where a hot bath had been drawn, scents of calming lavender and jasmine coating you. 
You only saw Nesta twice after that, once when she brought you some of her favourite romance books and again, two days later when she told you Feyre and Elain sent their love and well wishes. 
She’d had the family's healer, Majda, check you over for any untreated injuries, and when she came up short she offered you a few tonics for the discomfort and encouraged you to rest before sending you back on your way.
You shouldn’t have expected more, shouldn’t have longed for more. You supposed Nesta had done her part enough–saving you from Rafe and bringing you here. And yet, despite the House tending to your needs and the souls of the romance novels…you felt just as alone as you had in the mortal lands. 
You hadn’t seen Azriel since either, nor Cassian. You didn’t have much right to ask after them, to thank them again. They had their own lives and roles to fill, you knew your rescue had been nothing more than another third-grade mission to them. 
By the fifth day, the realisation had begun to sink in. That you’d been moved from one lonely home into another. Perhaps that was the course your life was fated to take–alone, unnoticed, nothing more than a ghost in the wind, nothing worth acknowledging. 
You wrote your thoughts into your leather-bound journal, the only form of release you had for these dark emotions. Yet every time the pen lifted from the parchment, you felt heavier than you had before. 
You were yet to leave your bedroom, often sitting at the window seat that overlooked the lights of the city, wondering what life awaited down there. Wondered if you’d ever get the opportunity to explore it. Nesta had mentioned that the House was warded from winnowing, the only way out was to fly or descend the ten thousand stairs. 
But you couldn’t fly, and you wouldn’t make the steps down either. You weren’t a prisoner, you knew that. But Nesta had done her part, saving you, bringing you to her and Cassian’s home. You were not her responsibility, not anyones. 
Yet, you couldn’t help but feel trapped, restricted. Moved from one stone building and into another. Perhaps that was what finally made you venture out of your room, barefeet padding across the cool floors.
You followed the winding staircase to a lower level, noting the ornate furniture that decorated the large space. A crackling hearth caught your attention, so inviting and warm in front of a plush couch. The House seemed to beckon you to it, a gentle breeze against the backs of your bare legs and it made your short nightgown sway. 
Following it, you sat on the couch and a thick blanket materialised and draped itself over your legs at the same time a steaming mug of tea and a new romance novel appeared on the table beside you. 
You smiled softly, warmth spreading in your chest as you thanked the House. 
An hour or so had passed, not that you were for certain, but the House remained silent. Nothing but sips of your tea and flipping of pages could be heard along with the crackling of the hearth. 
For a moment, you felt at peace in your own company. Completely content for this time to sit and read and know you wouldn’t receive a beating or worse for it. You stretched out your back, stifling a yawn as a pair of soft footsteps greeted your ears. 
Your eyes widened, an unnecessary apology already on the tip of your tongue, though for what you weren’t sure. That had become the norm for you, apologising for your every breath. 
But it was not Rafe that stepped out of the shadows, of course not. It was Azriel, in all his glory, wings tucked neatly behind his back and you counted the seven blue siphons that adorned his leathers. 
“Azriel,” you breathed, a sheepish smile on your face. 
Finally, some company. Someone to acknowledge your presence and to perhaps converse with. You shuffled on the couch, making to put your book down but all Azriel did was give you a terse nod in greeting and a thin smile before walking down the hall and out of your sight. 
It shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did. You should be used to this by now. You were used to it. But you couldn’t control that tiny thread of hope in your chest that things could be different. That you could be accepted and wanted and noticed. 
For the eighth night in a row, you were left in the dark with nothing but the crippling loneliness and aching of your soul to keep you company. 
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A/N: Thank you for reading!! This is the first instalment of this mini-series that I literally got the idea for two days ago lol. It'll be around 5/6 parts, smut will come and a few twists you won't expect!! Unfortunately I'm unable to get my old page back (rhysazriel), which means most of my previous writings have been lost but I'll likely repost the ones I have saved in my google docs in the late future (plug!az being one of them.)
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If you enjoyed it, please consider giving it a like and reblog, your feedback is always appreciated!! <3
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deadlake · 26 days ago
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Outfit Ref for my oc Torill
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cassandra-silver · 6 months ago
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I just had a crazy thought that may actually not be that crazy ... @glisten-inthedark, you'll probably be interested in this.
... What if the reason Odysseus uses Poseidon's own motif/melody for his "Maybe you could learn to forgive?" line is to literally match Poseidon's own way of speaking in order to have a better chance at reaching him?
Basically, Odysseus probably started speaking, not really expecting it to work. But then he feels the same crazy twinge of hope that we did, hearing that 3-second pause blind. And in the blink of an eye, he surmises that, oh, yes, he's getting somewhere. Something's happening. So, he goes all out, hijacks the trumpets, twists the words of Poseidon's catchphrase around (and definitely reaches his hand out toward him because there is no way he doesn't do that) ... literally meaning to show him in his own melody—aka a language he thinks Poseidon may understand better: "Look, this is what I mean. This is what you could be. Do you understand me when I say it in the way that you always speak? Doesn't this sound better?"
... Unfortunately, that triggers Poseidon (I wager because he is scared of how close to yielding he got there, and probably more so means to shut Odysseus up with his "DIE!" rather than anything else ... I have an analysis of this exchange here if you're interested!)
So, Odysseus learns that the only language Poseidon does understand is violence and ruthlessness. Six Hundred Strike occurs, where he hijacks the trumpets again and essentially repeats this offer just from a position of power and with significantly more violence. With the same meaning at its core, though (I go into more detail about that in this essay, if you're interested!)
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messymoonmad · 5 months ago
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okayyy this may be a little random lol but have you ever drawn scylla before xO ?
Never but if I did I'd have to put trigger warnings cause she would be terrifying (at least that's how I picture her)
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lyculuscaelus · 8 months ago
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Just some silly thoughts
(Feel free to ignore me but here’re some ideas for a 600 Strike AU and ofc they’re based on LotR what else are you expecting)
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And six hundred strike sounds more like “six hundred, strike” then they’re up and off and away they go against Poseidon
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rocktopus666 · 21 days ago
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Had to do the other page so here's a Mermay doodle with a Poseidon-like octobabe since I also listened to Epic last night
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masked-ragdoll · 2 years ago
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new chapter of this au finally!
also I made this meme while writing plot notes for later chapters >:3c
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gravity-knight · 4 months ago
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Oh btw
I am currently OBSESSED with Epic
More specifically Get in the water and Love in Paradise
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cypresscries · 6 months ago
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Woaw im so rainworldcore right now
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reigning-kingof-ithaca · 5 months ago
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Oh this made me cry. I really needed to hear this from Penelope herself tbh
I might do my own version of this; my perspective in different songs. I've written my POV once for the end of Get In The Water (when I get my wings!), but I wanna try this format since it integrates the actual lyrics of the song.
Also, from a writer's standpoint, this was written wonderfully. I love how poetic it is, and I really felt the emotion behind your words. Keep it up! :)
I wrote WYFILWMA from my own perspective, it might be a tad repetitive and advice would be appreciated, but here's my little short 'story' of sorts :)
And there he was.
There is nothing in the room, nothing in the palace, nothing in the world other than him and I in this moment. It must've only been a minute since he'd left for war. Maybe he was coming back to grab his bow.
In that instant, twenty years of pain- two decades of sorrow and longing- faded quicker than I could blink.
"Is it you?"
He looked up. Those eyes. Gods, those love-filled eyes. They hadn't aged a day.
"Have my prayers been answered? Is it really you standing there?"
It couldn't be. My mind- my heart- my very essence- had paused in true and utter disbeleif.
"Or am I dreaming once more?"
That must be it. I had dreamt of our reunion for nearly twenty years. I must be within one of those bittersweet reveries.
But no. Something was different.
"You look different- your eyes look tired. Your frame is lighter, your smile torn,"
His face softens, holding a gentleness only a man who knew true cruelty could express.
This was no dream.
"Is it really you, my love?"
He sighed. Such a simple, gentle sound- but that soft sigh, that small exhale, my entire being had yearned for small little things like that for longer than I bothered to remember.
"I am not the man you fell in love with,"
But he was- the same honey-like eyes. The same soft brown hair I used to run my fingers through. His hair was longer now- tousled and salt-blown from years on the sea.
"I am not the man you once adored,"
Once adored? What was he talking about? There was not a minute of my day, waking or resting, where I had not yearned for this man. There was no 'once adored'.
"I am not your kind and gentle husband,"
And yet, yet, his voice was ever so soft. He turned. He avoided my gaze. This man, my husband, avoiding my gaze. I'd never seen such an action from him, in all my time.
"And I am not the love you knew before,"
This bastard. I wait for him, wait for his arrival, I hold out on sheer hope and faith that he will return to me one day- and when he does, he dares tell me that he is no longer my love? It was all I could do to keep from scoffing aloud.
"Would you fall in love with me again?"
And there it was. He believes- he thinks, in that ever-so-quick mind of his- that I had ever even considered moving on from him. My eyes narrowed momentarily, but I remained silent.
"If you knew all I've done?"
My head tilted. What did he mean? What, upon this gods-forsaken earth, could possibly sway my devotion for this man?
"The things I cannot change- would you love me all the same?
I know that you've been waiting- waiting for love,"
I sighed. Maybe he truly had done something I might find reprehensible. No matter how much doubt weighed in my stomach, the question made its way out of my lips.
"What kinds of things did you do?"
He looked back up at me. His eyes, his soft eyes, held so much sorrow. Shame was eating at him from the inside out.
"Left a trail of red on every island-
Traded friends like objects I could use,"
Ah. So that was the fate of his fleet. For a moment, I considered how Ctimene might react- but, my sister-in-law was my lowest concern in this moment.
"Hurt more lives than I can count on my hands- and all of that was to bring me back to you,"
I knew it. Nothing he had done could waver my adoration, my steadfast affections- he was dumb to think so.
"So tell me, would you fall in love with me again? If you knew all I've done-"
I knew what he'd done. Or some shortened version of it- and nothing in my heart had changed. Staring into the face of love himself, I could never care this way for another.
"The things I can't undo- I am not the man you knew- I know that you've been waiting, waiting-"
He knew nothing of my wait, if he truly believed I could possibly deny him, or his loving embrace. It had been near impossible not to wrap my arms around him the moment he entered the room. But-
Patience was a virtue I had much of.
"If that's true- could you do me a favor, just a moment of labor-"
If he held such an idiotic belief, such as that I might no longer wish to love him- I would ask him a question of equal stupidity.
"That would bring me some peace.
See that wedding bed? Could you carry it over- lift it high on your shoulders- and take it far away from here!"
I watched the change in his face. The hurt. The anger. The complete shock. Good. He knew some of how I had felt when he questioned my vow of lifelong devotion.
"How could you say this? I had built that wedding bed with my blood and sweat,"
I know. I know that. And I had waited twenty years with unfaltering hope for his return- I knew what that blood and sweat devotion felt like.
"Carved it into the olive tree where we first met! A symbol of our love, everlasting-"
He was so close to the point- but he managed to miss it each time. God, this man. Prodigy of Athena, huh?
I guess it never stopped me from loving him, did it?
"Do you realize WHAT YOU HAVE ASKED ME?"
I didn't react to his tone. He was upset- a man torn by war and sea, a man who had fought tooth and nail to return home to me and our son. And yet, he beleived I'd dare deny him the love that I, too, craved so deeply.
"The only way to move it is to cut it FROM ITS ROOTS!"
Finally, at long last, he had reached my point.
"Only my husband knew that, SO I GUESS THAT MAKES HIM YOU!"
He appeared taken aback- his anger rapidly dissipated, replaced by that characteristic softness I was so fond of.
"....Penelope...."
Gods, how I had longed to hear my name from him, just once more. The nights I'd spent crying to Aphrodite to return my love to me, just so I can hear him speak, just so I can hear his voice, just one more time- all of that was granted, every sleepless prayer, every offering I'd burnt in desperation- my decades-long sorrow ended in this moment.
"I will fall in love with you, over and over again- I don't care how, where, when- no matter how long it's been, you're MINE,"
He stepped closer. I could see the little nick-scars on his face- marks that I was certain hadn't been present twenty years prior. Marks that made him look so ethereal, so unreal, so divine.
"Don't tell me you're not the same person- you're always my husband, and I've been waiting-"
And oh, how long I had waited. How many days had I stared at the beaches of my island, hoping I might see the speck of a ship on the horizon, or walking my palace halls just hoping to hear his joy-filled laughter lighting up the halls again.
"Waiting-"
Tears pool in his eyes. I knew they were flowing from mine just as freely. I didn't bother to wipe them away.
"Penelope-"
This day, this holy day, every single crevasse and crack that had dug its way into my heart over the past two decades sealed itself closed, healed with the very words leaving the man's lips.
"Waiting, waiting-"
He had said something. I couldn't hear him over my own wails of what felt like all-consuming, disbelieving joy.
"Waiting, waiting, waiting-
Oh, for you,"
His arms wrapped around me. Those arms, so strong and worn. He hid his tears in my shoulder as I wept openly, holding him as close to me as I could manage, as if I feared he might be whisked away with a moment's notice.
"How long has it been?"
I finally managed to croak the question to him. It felt like no time in the world had passed. Maybe we were still young and in love, maybe I'd just awoken from a nightmare and he was comforting me so softly.
"Twenty years,"
It didn't matter. Not a moment of my life had been spent without his presence. I would never, never leave this man. Not in my life, nor in my death. I would hold him in his sickest days, tolerate him at his most temperamental, hold him as he sobbed- just as I had all those years ago. Nothing- not one ounce of my love- had seeped away.
"I love you,"
Odysseus, Reigning King of Ithaca, Father of the brave prince Telemachus, General of the Trojan war, protégé of the wise and bold goddess Athena, Slayer of the Kalydonian Boar- he was all of those things, yes- but at this moment, he was my husband.
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tarotsoul · 5 months ago
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Ghost in the Wind — Part Two
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SUMMARY: After gaining some clarity on your position in the court, Azriel takes you to see the city, but by the end of the day, he's left with more questions than he started with.
WARNINGS: brief mentions of depression, sexual abuse and loneliness,
WORD COUNT: 3.9k
Series Masterlist
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In the three weeks that had passed, that familiar sinking feeling had begun to wedge its way deep into the pit of your stomach. You’d seen Nesta on a handful of occasions during that time. Mostly in passing, once when she dropped off more romance novels to your floor. 
Yes, floor. It seemed she didn’t want you sharing the level with her and Cassian, nor the level that you came to learn Azriel occupied just above you. 
It was suffocating you, the loneliness. The House appeared your only friend, and even that could only do so much to comfort and converse. You’d caught Cassian a few times in the mornings, when you were in the lounge reading by the fire, when he awoke to make breakfast and offered a terse nod just as Azriel did. 
Azriel. 
You hadn’t seen him at all since that night. Perhaps he was on a mission, perhaps not. It didn’t matter either way, he had no reason to see you, to seek you out. You weren’t friends, barely even acquaintances. You were a stranger living in his home. 
You had to keep reminding yourself of that.
But for how long? How long were you to be ignored, shunned as though you had a Godsforsaken plague? No, you needed to stop. You knew that wasn’t the case, no matter the nagging voice in the back of your head. 
Your gaze found your ring finger, the lack of the iron band making your stomach churn. You wondered what he was doing right now…looking for you? Or looking for another unfortunate soul he could force his body and mind upon? 
You shook your head, it wasn’t your problem anymore. And for once, you felt okay with being selfish. With putting yourself above him or a stranger. Though the thought still soured your mind. Hadn’t you been wishing all these years for someone to save you? No innocent soul deserved to endure the horrors you had by his hand. 
Just the thought of that endless pain had you standing abruptly from your position on your bed, wringing your fingers nervously. It was without proper thought that your feet carried you out of your room and down the hall, and you didn’t miss what felt like a gentle kiss of a breeze pushing you closer, encouraging you to go where you needed.
Though where you needed to go, you were unsure. You just needed to see someone, anyone. You couldn’t bear these thoughts any longer, couldn’t bear to feel like a prisoner anymore. 
You stopped dead in your tracks in the kitchen, noting Azriel sitting at the dining table with an apple in his hand. His eyes clocked yours, a brief flicker of surprise in his gaze. He pulled the fruit away from his parted lips. 
“Y/N,” he spoke, and his shadows skittered from his shoulders and slithered across the ground toward you. “I didn’t hear you coming.”
Your nostrils flared and it startled you. For years you’d been overcome with such sadness and heartache that you’d briefly forgotten what it had felt to feel anything else. Anger. That was what you felt now, a boiling rage that rooted in your gut—not at Azriel, not at Rafe or Nesta or anyone—no, you felt this anger at yourself for allowing your life to play the way it had, for allowing yourself to be so unseen and forgotten. 
I hadn’t seen you coming.
And you were so, so sick of it. 
“I’d like to see my cousin.” No please, no thank you, no desperate plea of an apology at the tip of your tongue that you had to shove down. No. You were done with being a ghost. With being nothing. 
Azriel quirked a brow, his shadows now resting on your own shoulders as they soothed your hair. He didn’t worry much about it, they often had a mind of their own around the people they sensed were calm and warm and familiar. 
But you weren’t familiar, and right now you weren’t calm and you weren’t warm. Now, you were angry, bubbling over with a whipping rage. His shadows weren’t with you out of comfort, his shadows were trying to calm you down. 
“Nesta is training with Cassian on the roof, I can get her for you—”
“No, not Nesta,” you cut him off. “Feyre, I want to speak with your High Lady and High Lord.”
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Azriel’s heart would not stop racing, would not stop thumping so hard it threatened to tear through his chest. It wasn’t in fear, not at all. It was something entirely different, something so foreign he couldn’t understand, he couldn’t control. 
He didn’t dare take his eyes from you, from the way that previous anger dissipated into your usual aura of worry and grief. You were beautiful, more so in the Fae lands than in the mortal. As if the air in Prythian breathed new life into you, as if you’d always belonged here. 
Azriel remembered what you’d said. How everything felt clearer after stepping through that wall. He had suspicions, very far-fetched and precarious suspicions, but he kept them to himself and his shadows as he watched on. 
That icy rage crumbled to a simmering pot of exhaustion as Feyre and Rhysand strolled into the House of Wind, hand in hand. You hadn’t seen your youngest cousin in years, and motherhood—Faehood…it looked good on her. She was thriving and you could almost feel the love and security the High Lord oozed when he looked at her. 
“Y/N…” the High Lady breathed as she took you in. 
You looked much healthier than when she’d last seen you those few years ago. Your skin had begun to regain its colour, your body beginning to rebuild its strength. Those awful bruises had healed, but you still wore that same frightful look on your face. 
“Fey…” You struggled to find the words to say to her, where to start. You wanted nothing more than to hold her, to feel another’s embrace but you didn’t approach. You weren’t accustomed to how things worked here, that even though she was your cousin, she was also High Lady. 
Would it be improper to embrace her? Would Rhysand and Azriel pull you off her? See you as a threat for wanting to feel your cousin's familiar touch and love?
As though she’d read your thoughts, Feyre closed the distance between you both and took you into her arms. Your resolve began to crumble, all of those feelings of loneliness creeping up on you in full force.
You willed the tears back as much as you could, but Feyre held you close, cooing to you that it was alright, that you were safe and she was so glad to have you there. 
It took much of your strength to finally pull away and cast your eyes to her mate, to the High Lord. Rhysand watched with a polite smile, though there was a look in his eyes as he gazed at you…a look that suggested he understood. 
Understood everything that you had endured, every feeling and thought as if he’d also once experienced them, too. 
“I um…I wanted to thank you both for allowing Nesta to bring me here.”
Rhysand chuckled at that, soft and sultry. 
“Nobody allows Nesta to do anything. She does what she wants and we all have to accept it whether we like it or not.”
He spoke in a humorous tone, as if the words hadn’t struck a cord so deep in your stomach that it made you nauseous. 
Azriel tensed beside him, and Rhysand quickly caught on to just how poorly he worded himself. “We are delighted to have you here, Y/N. But I’m incredibly sorry for the circumstances it took to get you out.”
You swallowed thickly, eyes darting between him and Feyre. 
“I appreciate you allowing me a room at the House of Wind, but I don’t wish to overstay my welcome.”
A collective frown plastered on their faces, but you continued. “I don’t know very much about these lands, but I’m happy and willing to work for my keep and find my own place of residence.”
Feyre flinched as though you’d struck her. “What’s wrong? You don’t like the House?”
Your lips parted and eyes widened, worried you’d now offended her. “No! No, the House is wonderful, truly,” you reassured her. “I just don’t want to be a burden, you’ve all done so much for me, I don’t want to take advantage of your kindness. I don’t want anyone to feel uncomfortable having a stranger in their home.”
Your eyes briefly met Azriel’s hazel ones, something akin to sorrow and regret in those golden orbs. Rhysand then took a tentative step closer, a deep-set frown of worry on his brows. 
“Y/N, if you wish for your own residence, we will fund that for you. But you are no stranger. You are family, and family will always have a home here. If the House of Wind is too much, we have the townhouse you are welcome to, or we can find something else that’s more suited to you.”
There was no point in hiding the silver that lined your eyes, not when you knew the three of them could smell and sense your every emotion. Perhaps that was why a tear fell down Feyre’s rosy cheeks—perhaps she could feel your agony, your appreciation.
Perhaps they all could feel that you were so unused to this kindness, to being wanted. 
Rhysand reached for your hand then, his skin warm against yours and your eyes fluttered closed. Nothing about the action was intimate, but you were beginning to realise just how touch starved you were, and Rhys could feel that. 
“Nesta thought you might want some space and time to adjust.” He admitted quietly, his voice soothing as it coaxed you to open your eyes. A violet gaze full of care and promise. Promise of love and acceptance. 
Then, his voice grew lighter, full of teasing humour. “She also threatened to skin us alive if we allowed you to be alone in the presence of a male. We never intended to make you feel alone.” 
… all Azriel did was give you a terse nod in greeting and a thin smile before walking down the hall and out of your sight. 
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. How foolish you had been to think you were a burden, that they hadn’t wanted you there. A watery chuckle left your lips as you opened your eyes and met Azriel’s gaze again. Sorrow. Guilt. That was why. 
You looked back to Rhysand just as something gentle stroked at your mind. It took you by surprise but his eyes never left yours, as though he was coaxing you to let him in, to let him feel your pain, to let him understand better. 
It scared you, the idea of anyone seeing your rawest thoughts and emotions. But his eyes, those violet eyes so familiar and warm in a way you could never begin to understand. So you let him in, let him feel everything you tried so hard to keep hidden away and locked up, and it caught the breath from his lungs, rendering him speechless. 
He swallowed thickly, eyes fluttering closed. And in a heartbeat, that pain and agony mellowed and faded until you felt nothing at all except pure relief. You didn’t know how he did it, how he forged his way through the dark forest of your mind and guided you through the other end.
There were no words to describe it. Nothing except at the end of that dark forest lay an open field of fresh soil and grass and trees and sunshine. A fresh start in mind and spirit, a place for you to plant new seeds. A place to hope. 
As quickly as he entered, he retreated. And he took that darkness with him—as much as he could. 
“I understand the pain you have endured in your life. For fifty years, I experienced something very similar. But that pain does not define you. The mind is a powerful thing, Y/N. As long as you believe in hope, you will always find it.”
He released your hand then, stepping back to Feyre’s side. 
“Tonight, we will have a family dinner at the House of Wind so you can meet the others. The House will always be a home to you, whether you chose to stay or find your own residence. But you needn’t do anything alone anymore. And if you’d like to work, we can find something for you, but for now…enjoy your freedom.”
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A gentle tapping at your bedroom door broke your attention from your book. You blinked, waiting to see if you'd heard right, when a lone shadow slinked under your door as if to silently let you know who was on the other side. 
Placing your book to the side, you padded to the door and slowly opened it. Azriel stood a respectable distance away, allowing you space to breathe and he offered a gentle smile in greeting. 
“I was about to head into the city for some supplies…I was wondering if you’d like to join me. I’d have to fly you, of course, if you’re comfortable with that.” 
Your heart thundered in your chest. Not at the aspect of being alone with him, but at the thought of finally exploring the city you watched from your balcony every night. 
You loosed a breath. “Am I allowed?” 
He frowned, a shadow reaching for your fingers in a way of reassurance. “Of course. Rhys meant what he said. You’re free to go anywhere you wish.”
You inhaled somewhat shakily, and found yourself nodding your head. 
Azriel took a moment then to take in your appearance. No doubt clothes that Nesta had sorted for you—a pair of simple black leggings and a thick grey knitted sweater. 
You noticed his eyes racking over your outfit and a warmth found its way to your cheeks. “Should I change?” 
His eyes met yours and he shook his head, his smile growing just slightly. “No, not unless you want to.” You nodded just as he added, “I think you look lovely.” 
A compliment. Gods when was the last time you’d received a compliment? There was no hiding the heat that painted your cheeks and neck, no hiding the way you averted his gaze and rocked back and forth on the balls of your feet. 
Ah, shoes. You needed shoes. 
“Just let me find something to put on my feet.”
You turned and left the door open, allowing Azriel a view of your bare room. He noted the lack of…well anything. Nothing on your walls, no nick-nacks or trinkets. Nothing but a satchel on your dresser and three books on the window seat. 
A moment now to compose himself, to regain his bearings. He didn't have to keep his distance anymore, didn't have to hide his growing intrigue and infatuation with you.
Infatuation. As if he were nothing more than a lap dog. Rhys had warned him as much—to not be how he had in the past. And it was easy this time to reassure his brother that it wasn't like that.
It wasn't a hungry desire that consumed him, no. It was something deeper than that, something inexplicably and irrevocably crippling.
But he had promised himself to be mindful of your past, your current state. He wanted to get to know you, an dire need and desire for you to get to know him, too.
His shadows threatened to follow but Azriel reigned them in, scolding silently that it was rude to enter uninvited. He and his tendrils of darkness waited at the threshold of your room, watching as you approached once more with a pair of flats on your feet. 
It was then that Azriel could sense your excitement. And that unfamiliar feeling found its way in his chest and stomach and soul again. 
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You had never seen anything like Velaris before in your life. It was just as beautiful in the day as it was at night from the view of your bedroom. Azriel landed softly, mindful of you the entire flight down and as your feet hit the cobblestone path, you took a deep breath. 
The streets were wide, rows of shops and vendors and restaurants everywhere you looked. Bustling with life, fae of all varieties walked the streets of their home. Some blue, some pink, some green. 
It took you a few moments to take it all in—so overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of what you’d been missing in these twenty-six years of your life. Your hand was still wrapped around Azriel’s bicep as he tucked his wings in and began to guide you through the city streets. 
Too caught up in your surroundings, you missed the looks of passersby that lingered a little too long. The citizens of Velaris were not used to their Shadowsinger escorting a female so intimately through the city. Much less a mortal female.
But no one seemed to balk at that, no one appeared to have a problem with your presence. 
Azriel walked you through the streets, pointing out different places that he and the rest of the Inner Circle liked to frequent most. You were in awe, completely dumbfounded by the sheer beauty of it all. 
And when he guided you toward a merchant's cart full of crystals and rocks and stones, your excitement seemed to grow tenfold. 
“You like crystals?” Azriel asked, noticing the way your feet hurried a little faster to view the vendor. 
A brief smile coated your lips as your eyes trailed the pieces on display.
“My mother used to collect them. Secretly, of course—they were forbidden in the mortal lands, claimed to be used by the Fae and other…creatures. She said they harnessed healing properties. They were all I had left of her.”
It was the most Azriel had heard you speak at once, and he was not about to let you dwell on that for a single moment. He wanted to hear more. 
“Did you bring them with you?”
Your smile faded, fingers reaching out to trace over an uncut rose quartz. “No. After Rafe and I wed, he found them and he threw them into the river.”
You didn’t look at Azriel as you spoke, didn’t even know why you admitted such an agonizing memory outloud, but he didn’t press further. Though you were sure you could’ve heard a shadow of his hiss in disdain.
“This one is tigers eye.” You pointed to the smooth stone no larger than a silver coin. “My mother called it the Stone of Courage…and this one is black tourmaline, the Stone of Protection.”
Azriel watched you closely, watched your shoulders relax at the memory of your late mother. He scooped them into a scarred hand, nodding for the merchant’s attention and they were wrapped in parchment and handed over to you.
You blubbered, looking between the merchant and Azriel, to tell them both that you were simply admiring, that you had no money. But Azriel nodded a thanks and with a hand to the small of your back, he guided you further into the city.
“If you see something you like, put it on the House’s account and it will be taken care of. Rhys has more money than sense, he’d be offended if you didn’t spend it.”
The thought of spending the High Lord’s money was not one that sat well with you. Despite the kindness he’d shown earlier, the promise of you not being a burden…you didn’t want to take advantage anymore than you already had. 
You didn’t say anything, though. Not when you had a feeling Azriel would only try to convince you otherwise. 
You walked for another thirty minutes, your hand still around his arm but he didn’t protest, didn’t allow you to be separated from him as you walked through a busier crowd. 
And then you saw it. That beautiful winding river that sparkled like the deepest sapphire. It flowed through the city, loitered with ships and boats to import and export all sorts of goods. 
“This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
Breathless. You were utterly awestruck. Yet Azriel couldn’t seem to take his eyes away from you. In his 500 years of life, he’d seen some incredibly gorgeous females, yet none as exquisite as you. 
There was nothing mortal about your beauty, about your aura. And the longer he was spending in your presence, the more he felt himself sinking under. 
And watching you now, so relaxed and at peace… 
He shouldn’t be feeling this. Not again. Not for you. And yet despite that, he found himself saying, “You haven’t even seen the Rainbow yet.”
You looked at him then, eyes glistening and cheeks warm. 
“What’s the Rainbow?”
Azriel smiled, wide and untamed and your heart stopped. “It’s what Velaris is known for. There’s a hundred galleries, supply stores, sculpture gardens…and anything in between.”
He felt like he was going to die. His heart would not stop pounding, his shadows would not stop skittering. The smile on your face grew, your eyes wild and alive. That unfamiliar feeling—he knew what that was now. 
Excitement. And not yours this time, but his own. Something he hadn’t felt since Rhys and Cassian taught him to fly as a young boy. 
“I’ll take you,” he found himself saying. “Whenever you want to go, I’ll take you.”
You looked back at the river then, hope in your eyes once more. For the first time in your life, you felt like you belonged. You could see yourself happy here, living and not just surviving. 
And Azriel, oh, Azriel wanted to watch every moment of your happiness. Because despite the horrors you’d been subjected to, despite the things Rhysand saw in your memories, the thoughts in your mind…you still held hope. 
You still longed to live another day. 
So he didn’t follow as your feet carried you across the river bank, didn’t say a word as you sat on the grass and let yourself feel and breathe and water that fresh field in your mind. 
He watched from afar, allowing you this moment. 
And as you stood and raised your hands from the soil and sauntered toward the rivers clearing, Azriel’s shadows began to quiver in that now recognisable way his chest had seized throughout the day, whispering to him.
A lonesome patch of brown and green tulips lay in your wake, as though you’d breathed life into the earth with nothing more than your mind and touch. 
He balked and the shadows whispered again.
So that night, after dinner with the Inner Circle, where you laughed and smiled and ate…Azriel found himself travelling across Velaris at a lightning speed toward the wall at the border of the Spring Court and mortal lands. 
And there, where the remnants of that creature barely remained, laid another solitude patch of tulips—brown and green. 
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A/N: hehe, you're truly not prepared for what I have planned for this series hahahaha but I would love to hear your guys' thoughts and theories about where you think this series might be going!!
If you enjoyed it, please consider giving it a like and reblog, your feedback is always appreciated <3
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TAG LIST: @anna-reader-blog @bubybubsters @honethatty12 @angiieguevara @honk4emoboyz @e1jeyy @celestialgilb @rcarbo1 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @judig92 @moonfawnx @historygeekqueen @idkitsem @horneybeach1 @apenasandorinha @thaynarajejheje @popcornlauncher @mrsjna @fuckingsimp4azriel @kk191327 @babypeapoddd @bluebries81 @secretlyhers @daughterofthemoons-stuff @mixheleee @be-your-coffee-pot 
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deadlake · 1 year ago
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A campaign map for Guild in the woods! this was a collab between me and my girlfriend @kaoruki ! She did the text editing and design/color work on the emblems as well as base colors. I made the continent shape, helped with some of the emblem designs and did alll the detail painting.
The middle is blacked out because it is an exploration based rp and that's the great unknown we're gonna have players map out hehe...
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laritamiauu · 5 months ago
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HII OMG
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WYL REACHED 500K VIEWS AND GITW REACHED 300K HOLY SHIT THANK YOU SO MUCHHHHH
I've never had this much support on my stuff before I feel so honored that you guys like it so much!!😭😭😭
Thank you to all the people who have reacted and made edits and fanarts to my stuff it helps me reach the stage that im at and im so happy how popular silly ol hermes is getting!
i hope you still enjoy the next things that are coming like the 600 strike animatic, i promise that is going to be literally EPIC
also if you haven't seen my animatics, please consider to check them out!
youtube
youtube
anyways, thank you so much!! see ya!
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witless-winion1 · 6 days ago
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Alright FINE
headcanon that Odysseus, Polites, and Eurylochus have matching friendship bracelets: hell yeah
headcanon that Odysseus, Polites, and Eurylochus have matching friendship bracelets braided from the mane hair of Athena’s boar: HELL YEAH
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cassandra-silver · 7 months ago
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I love. LOVE. Get In the Water
It's one of the objectively best songs in the musical; I will die on this hill.
Poseidon was always, despite being pretty much the main antagonist of EPIC, a really underdeveloped character in my opinion. He just needed a little more nuance, and the fact that one (+ kind of one more) song managed to add so much to his characterization pretty much exclusively through subtext and implications is incredibly impressive writing. Because it did!
At the start, he's yet again playing games with Odysseus, the way he did in Ruthlessness. In both songs, he could kill him easily at any point, yet he chooses not to for the sake of playing games. In Ruthlessness, this becomes his own hubris as it leads to Odysseus escaping.
If you listen closely, at the start of GITW he already sounds slightly different. He's still trying to keep up this "God of Ruthlessness" front that he's so proud of, but he's no longer more or less carefree the way he was in Ruthlessness. He's been obsessing over this feud for ten years, and even if he would never admit it, it's actually clear just from his voice that he really is tired of it too. Not in the sense of it emotionally draining him the way it probably does Odysseus, but in the sense that it's a bother, a loose end in his life, a book that he finally wants to slam shut.
But he still has a reputation to uphold, and he still cannot close this book until Odysseus is dead, so he keeps up the game. Instead of just killing him, he's taunting him to kill himself. He might associate the idea of just striking him down with a sort of loss, like then he'd have to get his hands dirty. Then he's rambling about killing his people, his family. He's provoking Odysseus on purpose, likely trying to get him to snap back, to hate and fear him the way that Poseidon would think any mortal who has consumed this much of his time should. In his eyes, Odysseus deserves nothing less than to curse him with his last breath as his "darkest moment," the god who became the bane of his life.
And Odysseus replies, of all things, with ... sympathy.
Honestly, I don't blame Poseidon for being speechless for three full seconds. He literally just threatened to gauge Telemachus' eyes out the way Odysseus did with Polyphemus, and this absolute madlad of a man replies with an acknowledgment that he (might have) caused Poseidon pain too.
Now, I don't really think Poseidon was particularly hurt over Polyphemus' loss, or hurting in any way in that moment (if he were, I highly doubt he'd still be playing games, and he would've mentioned his son as opposed to speaking about his reputation.) But just the fact that Odysseus acknowledges that he might be hurting too is probably something Poseidon hasn't heard in ... who knows how long? His family is the Olympians. I don't think I have to say more.
It's actually more of a genuine apology than Odysseus' explanation in Ruthlessness ... (even though that was also a perfectly fine apology by Greek standards, as far as I'm aware.) Now he doesn't say "sorry" because he's still not sorry for hurting Polyphemus, since he still needed to do that in order to escape. But he expresses regret over the pain he caused in a more genuine way than ever.
I am convinced that Poseidon is utterly unfamiliar with sympathy or mercy. He's lived by his "Ruthlessness is mercy" motto for centuries, and he doesn't know anything else. No one would try to teach him something different. The other gods all live by this logic, even if he's the most vocal about it considering he seems to have made it his whole personality. Mortals wouldn't dare to question Poseidon in the first place. And barely anyone would be willing to treat someone with kindness who is in turn treating everyone around them with ruthlessness.
It's very likely that Poseidon hasn't encountered anyone like this until Odysseus. Ruthlessness is simply how he treats people and also how he expects to be treated back. The fact that Odysseus doesn't, the fact that instead of hating, fearing, or cursing him, he acknowledges that they have both hurt each other and that it doesn't lead anywhere to still pursue vengeance, must have triggered Poseidon in an unprecedented way.
To him, this was probably the most outrageous thing Odysseus could have said in that moment. And it throws him off so much that he is genuinely speechless, and then simply replies, "I can't." ... his most genuine-sounding line in the whole musical.
I cannot stress enough how much it threw me off to hear this line; in the best way imaginable, it doesn't sound like Poseidon. It sounds almost vulnerable. Almost human. Because he is genuinely at a loss so much that he forgets to put up his "wrathful god" facade for just one second. Standing ovation to Steven Rodriguez for his whole performance, but especially this part.
And then Odysseus goes all out to say something even more outrageous: "Maybe you could learn to forgive?"
... Which is when Poseidon snaps.
Kind of understandable, honestly. There's this mortal whom he has likely fantasized about seeing pleading, hate-filled, and terrified, cowering before him for ten years now ... telling him that he ought to learn something. Even hijacking his own motif and his instrument in order to turn it on its head, "defile" it if you will.
This f*cking mortal pr*ck took his own "Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves" catchphrase and turned it into forgiveness ... Of course, Poseidon is no longer hesitating; of course, he is no longer concerned with getting his hands dirty or not. He yells "DIE!" and unleashes his ultimate move (which is really overkill for simply killing a mortal if you think about it) ... But he does it anyway because this time he genuinely means it.
... That, and I am also convinced he jumps to that in order to simply shut Odysseus up, fearing what he might do or think if he lets him go on. Because you cannot tell me that Odysseus didn't actually reach him for just one moment. He was far too thrown off guard, far too vulnerable in that one second. That moment of kindness did something to him, and he hated it. He also probably didn't trust himself to be able to keep listening to Odysseus speak like that. So, he abandons his (still very technically feasible!) blackmail/intimidation and just straight-up kills him.
This simple exchange (my favorite moment in the whole musical, actually) tells us so much about both of these characters that it makes me want to skitter and squeal in excitement.
Here is Odysseus—the very same one whom Poseidon specifically tried to teach ruthlessness—becoming the first person in a long time to offer him sympathy despite how Poseidon himself showed him nothing but ruthlessness. And then one song later, here is Odysseus showing him the consequences of not accepting said sympathy.
Six Hundred Strike and what Odysseus does to Poseidon would've not hit the same, in my opinion, if he hadn't made this offer, if he hadn't given Poseidon this way out, even if no one watching genuinely expected it to work (probably not even Odysseus himself.)
Six Hundred Strike is not Odysseus exacting vengeance If GITW proved anything about Odysseus, it's that he does not want vengeance. He wants all of the hatred and pain to be over, to the point where he is willing to let go of, and I am inclined to say forgive Poseidon for what he's done to him. Six Hundred Strike is simply Odysseus teaching him this lesson that Poseidon couldn't have learned in any other way, because he has proven in GITW that he genuinely does not speak any language besides that of ruthlessness (more on that in this essay!)
It's just the perfect representation of how Odysseus has now finally learned the balance between mercy and ruthlessness, which seems to be the core theme of the musical: Both have their time and place; one simply has to be willing to act in both ways and know when to use either. No one extreme is the solution. I am genuinely exhilarated that Odysseus finally seemed to have figured out that it's been both all along.
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gt-abby · 3 months ago
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I love everything about @neal-illustrator ‘s animatics, but what’s the best part of them are the idea that gods have giant pure forms that they use when fighting.
Absolutely love this shot, bc not only is Poseidon huge when confronting Odysseus in Ruthlessness and Get in the Water, but he’s even BIGGER when he attacks him in GITW.
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At first he wanted to be intimidating, but now he’s absolutely furious, and he really doesn’t need to be so big to kill a human but he wants to be, to show Odysseus exactly what he’s dealing with.
I can’t get enough of Ruthlessness, and Neal made what I was imagining real with her animatic, which I’d prefer to call actually a straight up animation bc it really does move frame by frame almost like an animation, especially water shots.
I don’t feel like pulling out this frame but when Poseidon attacks Odysseus in GITW then places him on the rock to tell him to get in the water by himself, it almost made actual butterflies to fly from my stomach- Neal, you’re an absolute legend! I can’t wait for when your animation for Six Hundred Strike comes out, I’d literally pay you MONEY for it ( I know you’re busy, not trying to rush you ofc but when it does come out I will combust)
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