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istherewifiinhell · 5 months

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okayyyy also. tagged by @joelletwo for 5 topics i could talk about for an hour with no prep.

now. two things. 1. i have infernal podcast dude energy and could say a lot about nothing. weird trait to have if u dont like talking to people? hard to say. 2. GESTURES AT BLOG. im ALREADY. talking at length abt my beloved shit. so im just ruling out turtles, alien robots, trek, etcetcetc all the shit thats been a main blog topic for the last past. 4 years?

I'm gonna say.... western voice actors? not that i could really. Give a lecture so much as. I'm way more familiar with them that than I am live action actors. And I'm kinda just CONSTANTLY like. Oh you know so and so from every cartoon youve ever fucking seen? And FEEL a real. gap. with people when they dont have a same reference point. probably like how ppl feel with me when i dont know their acting guys jhadbgjfga. Like u can name 5 VAs from ur childhood cartoons/animated movies right? And personal interest like, hey btw u know like the entire cast of tng was in disneys gargoyles? U know keith david can SING? And diego luna? Hey you know about Canadian actors who are in all the dubs and video games and yeah cheap shit? You know Scott McNeil right? You know Ian James Corlett? You know. THE IAN. of being Ian. Hello. is this thing still on?

I really like and care about the topics of education, children's rights and pedagogy? Not academically so much as, personal interest. What seeing very clearly that there was a lot of arbitrary rules that involved things like. The Government. and Systems. as a child does to a motherfucker I guess? I'm always INTERESTED in a discussion about it, is how i mean I guess. Like focuses of multiple intelligence and "applied knowledge" (and short comings there of). I mean long and short of it. Kids are full human beings and until u can grapple with that their feelings and opinions um. Actually matter. I hate you? jdhbgjhdb. And Naturally the world being good for kids has the prerequisite of it not sucking ass for adults too....

UHhhh guh. User design/civil engineering? You'll hear it from me until the day I die, crushed under the tires of a ford f1 giga truck with the LED 20million watt bulbs. PROTECTED BIKE LANES. for the love of god. I just know a lot of designers I guess and like engineering, conceptually. But like, u know that famous bridge everyone crashes into. If theres 80million warning signs and people are still crashing... maybe theres. other factors. Or you know ofc like, traffic planning, vehicle accidents, structural disasters. A lot of them are not just. Things happening. Tragedies. There's politics there. Usually a lot of Money stuff. and structural racism. The real reason your fridge is full is that there's a bunch of half empty condiment jars hiding all your forgotten left overs. And widening the roads isnt gonna do shit for traffic.

Jackass entry: Themes and motifs of anyyytthing ive watched with another person or saw, and like they also know it. I realllly like, visual theming and narrative shorthands. Anything that breaks like, maybe people in this setting dont have the same customs, but their gonna do something so you the audience can recognize it. Non literal/accurate use of colour and lighting, for mood and clarity. Breaking the physical shape and scale of things so they can appear and be readable on screen. COSTUMING COSTUMING COSTUMING. A well styled character can do soooo much for your understanding of a work, especially with large casts, and a poorly styled one can take me right out. Well. anyway. yes i love animation u all knew that.

uhhhhh Thatgamecompany/giantsquids studio. im giving myself a free space. lol technically I DO. blog about this. the music. at least. BUT beloved. games. Me and everyone else I guess. Hey speaking of u know its laura bailey and troy baker as the voices in the pathless? And you know how a lot of the games have themes of coming into being/growing/rebirth. And LOTS of environmentalism. And implied cultural world building, and wordless stories. and beautiful metaphor rich otherworldly visuals. and gameplay styles that really connect with the emotional story their going for. and ofc, the music. oh the leit motifs. well. there u go. sword of the sea when?

tagginggg. uh did anyone get @deadgrantaires or @army-of-bee-assassins yet? anyone elseeee who wants to regale me with things they knowww about. id love to know.

#some shit #KINDA. gave up. cause i hampered myself with the restriction not my fandoms. jadgbdhf BUT YALL ALREADY KNOWWWWW i could take u thru #my fav mirage issues or like. my favourite implications of tf stuff.#like. all the things i like to watch and like. this is a story about familys. or rebellion. or why people care about each other.#why its important to keep living. and everything iver ever blogged about. lmao #i also skipped on things like. cool machinery i like or how products are WORSE now days. even tho. djjhdbfj. if i have to talk to a #less known person i would consider those like. safety topics. dgjhdf #if u wanted to be really vague i could to a tangential daisy chain all themed around the colour blue. ofc.

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mypunkpansexualtwin · 1 year

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psst i saw you reblogged a bg3 (which im currently 30 hrs in on, god what a game.) ask meme earlier but i forgot to like it to find it again. dealers choice on which numbers you'd like to answer. lemme hear about your tav & your playthrough

I did go and unbury that in case you want to do it too. Link there for anyone who wants to use it.

You're getting more Maya (although there's probably gonna be a Cat run soon, probably gonna roll her up, get off the nautiloid, then truck on her save once I'm done with Maya's since I'm solidly into act 3 with her. I should work on my other saves too but whatever.)

As far as dealer's choice, I'm gonna limit myself to 5 because I will be here for hours otherwise.

1) Tell us about your Tav! Name, class and subclass, race, pronouns, etc. Do you have a headcanon where they're from? Their family? Are they a Dark Urge? Did you choose an original character or an Origin Character? Was it an easy decision?

Maya Cutter, Vengeance Paladin, Duergar (headcanon is her mother was a Duergar and her father was a Gold Dwarf and that's why the grey complexion only shows as a vague ashy cast and as hyperpigmentation in her scars, and why her hair was lightly shot through with silver all her life.) She is indeed a Dark Urge, so there's some stuff I've adjusted in the backstory to fit with what we learn in act 3 regarding that, but for the most part it remains unchanged. Mainly that her mother was not exactly a good Duergar down in the Underdark and her father wasn't exactly a willing part of the household. Briefly had her own family, but Vengeance Paladin things happened that set her on a very bad path, so the memory loss was a nice hard reboot. Lot of tragedy, lots of death, because if you're gonna pick the edgelord background, might as well lean into it. Plus, I'm bad at letting the coping mechanism characters have a good time.

It was definitely an easy choice for OC playthrough every time, and definitely easy preexisting OC choices for both TDU saves; Maya for the "actually I hate this" and Felicity for Full Murder Hobo. I've got like 8 more not-TDU OCs waiting in the wings at this point and I'm only considering an Origin because I want Karlach and Wyll to smooch.

2) Was there something about the character creator that just couldn't capture your character? Please tell us about their hair, tattoos, piercings, disabilities, their trans or intersex body, or anything else you feel comfortable sharing!

A few things, yeah. First and foremost, Maya is a Tough Old Broad, but physically the cc only allowed for Tough. She's old and fat and happy with that, and while she's got a decent amount of muscle, she's not nearly as buff as the Dwarf character model. (That said, if female dwarves can have beards they should also get body hair. Unshave her.) Woman's built like a dumpling and, outside of the battle scars and edgelord coat of paint, looks more like she should be a cookbook mascot.

Another big one is a consistent thing for her between every au is she has a prosthetic arm. Right arm specifically, starting just below the shoulder, always lost in a fight against something significantly bigger and nastier than her because she put herself between it and someone who couldn't put up a fight. Probably skeletal in this case, reinforced with infernal iron, but it's kinda vague in my head.

Last bit is she's more heavily scarred all over (some of it so severe it looks like pieces of her had to be stitched back onto her body) and with some different stuff written on her face now that I know Larian used the actual Infernal alphabet. Probably slightly luminous scarring rather than just lurid orange face paint, across the face as seen here, as well as around the amputation site on her arm.

...I should dig out my tablet.

19) Did your character spend a night with a companion either the night of the party or earlier? Is it someone they have continued interest in?

Yes and no? She chatted everyone up and about half the party was sad to be shot down, save Lae'zel (already got shot down day fucking one after getting off the nautiloid), Wyll (having his introspective time that she left him to), and Astarion. Astarion immediately headed off any interest (that wasn't actually there, I misclicked) with the "it's not you, it's me. I have standards." line, which (headcanon) got a really good laugh out of her and a "careful there, prettyboy, keep that up and I might actually start to like your skinny ass." She likes a friend she can argue and be catty with.

As far as actually spending the night, she and Karlach did a lot of flirting and then uh. Thinking about each other after working themselves up without having a chance to properly fix the whole Too Hot, Hot Damn issue. Karlach has continued to be Maya's romance, but it is a tragedy she couldn't be poly with her and Wyll. (That said, if I were to replay another Maya save, TDU or not, I'd probably lean less into my own preference and more into Maya being an old slut before sticking with one of the Act 3 companions who's a little closer to her age.)

(I'm rolling these two into one question)

28) Did you recruit Scratch the dog? Did you encounter him at all? (29) Did you adopt an owlbear? Do you have a name for your child?

His name is Baby.

35) Has your character done anything that they regret?

*sweats in Dark Urge*

Aside from any TDU stuff, Maya was very conflicted about how she handled Mayrina's stuff after the Hag. Found the wand, regretted not snapping it. Instead, she used it, felt bad about it, passed it off to Mayrina, felt weird about it, and basically kept wondering on and off during quiet moments "was that...... was that the right call?" well into act 3.

(Even in act 3, it's basically "y'know what, we all grieve on our own schedule. Still weird tho.")

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #my ocs #maya acerbi #answers to questions y'all actually asked #ciadoodles #if folks wanna send more I'm good for it but again no promises #long post

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beels-burger-babe · 3 years

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A Pain You'll Soon Regret - Pt. 4

***Here we go! Okay. So a reminder to everyone to read SAFELY! Please make sure you check in with yourself and your mental well-being before, during and after the fic. Know your triggers, know your limits. Be careful, dears. ❤❤ Also just a HUGE thank you to everyone for supporting this series. I am so glad you've all loved it so much. It's been a process, but I'm glad you've stuck with me throughout it 😊***

Poly!MC Summary: MC and the demon lords get in a fight resulting in MC leaving. They planned on going to Purgatory Hall until things cool off, but they never quite make it there. TW: Heavy Angst, Violence, I don't know what to tag this, but there is a pretty nasty verbal fight, Gore/Injury Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Inside the Purgatory Hall was a sight that no one had seen since the end of the Great Celestial War. The seven Avatars of Sin sat defeated around a broken, bloodied body as they held on tightly to one another with tears running down their face.

They each held on to a part of you as they bowed their heads in despair for the damage done to you and regret for inadvertently causing it to happen. They sat in silence for the first twenty minutes, simply basking in the utter sorrow that filled the room, before Satan spoke up. "L-Lucifer?" He asked with a woeful tone. "How do we fix this? C-Cause I've read all the books a-and I don't know how we can make this better." If the severity of the situation wasn't already so obvious, that fact that Satan, of all people, was turning to Lucifer for advice made it glaringly so. And then it got even worse.

Lucifer, not even looking up at his brother, squeezed your hand and he pressed his forehead against it. His shoulders shook as sobs began to come from his mouth. "I-I don't know, Satan. I...I just don't know if we can." Seeing Lucifer crack was enough for the entire group. Soon they were all leaning on one another, sobbing as they mourned what their relationship with you once was and feared for what would come in the future. In the midst of the crying, Leviathan felt a small squeeze on the hand he was holding. He quickly looked over at you and tried shushing his brothers. "I think they're waking up!" Lucifer looked over at Asmodeus. "Go get Simeon and Solomon!" Knowing that now wasn't the time to argue, Asmo merely nodded before taking off. There was some movement behind your eyelids, and you squeezed Mammon's hand tighter, but still no words or opening of eyes. Belphie ran a hand through your hair from where your head was in his lap. "Come on, Angel," he whispered desperately, "open your eyes for me. Wake up." A small groan came from you as the door flew open and Solomon, Luke and Simeon rushed into the room.

"All of you out," Solomon ordered as he shoved Levi out of the way and took his place. All of the brothers instantly tensed in defence. They opened their mouths to argue, but Solomon raised a hand to silence them. "We don't have time to argue this. Considering the situation when MC last saw you, I don't want to risk stressing them more by them waking up being surrounded by the seven of you. You can wait outside. We will let you in again if, and only if, they want to see you. Now, go," his words were quick and heated, though the wizard wasn't even looking at them, too focused on you. Lucifer growled lowly, before shaking his head and turning away from the wizard. "I hate to admit, but they-" "When he said we don't have time, he meant we don't have time!" Luke snapped and pointed at the door. "Out! Now! You should be grateful we even let you see them for this long!" Satan's head snapped towards Luke at those words. All of the rage that had been lying dormant inside of him, suddenly washed over him as he went to charge at the small angel. Luke didn't so much as flinch, even as Beel restrained him and the demon began snarling and thrashing. He did, however, react as a whimper spilled from your lips and you turned you began to move restlessly. "I said out!" he picked up the closest item to him, a pillow, and threw it harshly at Lucifer. "Take your feral brothers and leave." Lucifer glared at the child but did as asked. With some not-so-mild complaints from the others, the lords left the room. Luke stomped over to the door and locked it shut behind them. Simeon replaced where Belphegore had been sitting, and placed your head in his lap gently, as he watched your eyes begin to softly flutter open.

*** Pain and shouting. That's all you could hear and feel. What was happening around you or what even happened to you, you couldn't recall. You wanted the noise to stop. You wanted the pain to go away. You tried to open your mouth to ask for as much, but all that came was a whimper. The shouting got worst, and the ringing in your head grew and grew until finally, a peaceful silence filled the room. It was now just you, the darkness, and the pain. Or so you thought until you felt someone place your head down on something soft. Mustering up what little strength you could pull from your body, you slowly blinked open your eyes. Blue eyes. At the sight of them, you instantly felt the panic that you hadn't even realized had built up, deflate within you. Blue eyes had saved you. Of that much, you were sure. You couldn't quite remember the details. But you knew that a person with blue eyes had saved you from something...something horrible. These blue eyes in particular were surrounded by warm brown skin and framed with dark hair; making you realize that this was not the person who saved you. Simeon

Your mind provided. His name is Simeon. Simeon smiled peacefully at you. "Hello, MC. It's lovely to see you with us again." You heard little footsteps rush across the room. When you looked over you found your true saviour, Luke, looking at you with a concerned, teary-eyed expression. "Are you in pain? Do you remember what happened? Simeon said that you hit your head pretty hard, but we wouldn't know the extent until you woke up. D-Do you remember me?" You chuckled, though the sound was dry and cracked from disuse and you nodded. "Of course, I remember you, Luke. You saved me," you croaked. At hearing your voice, Luke gasped and grabbed a glass of water from the side table. He handed it to you as a white-haired man, Solomon if you could recall, helped you sit up. "Th-That's good! That means you're okay! R-Right, Simeon?" Luke stuttered tearfully as glanced up at his superior. You weren't listening though. As they moved you into a seating position, you had suddenly become fully aware of something, or rather, your lack of something. "M-My...My leg," the room fell silent as you lean forward and brushed your fingers against the bandages. It all came flooding back to you. The fight. The demons. The complete and utter terror that filled your body. The excruciating pain as you believed that you were going to be eaten alive. You gasped and pulled back as though you had been burned. "Oh-Oh my god!" you choked out as you brought a trembling hand to cover your mouth as you stared at the space where your leg used to be. "Th-they- I almost- I-I think I'm going to be sick." Solomon's eyes widened as he quickly grabbed a nearby vase and placed it under your face. You gripped onto it tightly as you spilled your stomach contents inside it. Simeon whispered small words of comfort as he rubbed your back. "Let it out. You'll feel better afterwards. " You whimpered and passed the vase off to Solomon who set it aside. Your heart was racing in your chest as your thoughts travelled at a mile a minute. Your body trembled as a few cries slipped from your lips. You felt nothing and everything at once. What were you supposed to do? Simeon, Solomon and Luke were here, and you were so grateful for them. But they weren't who you wanted. They weren't who you needed. "The brothers-" You sobbed as you gripped onto the blanket that hardly maintained your modesty. "I-I want my boys. Please? A-Are they here? D-Do they know a-a-about...about-" Solomon gently squeezed your arm as you began to sob. "They know and they're here. They're a bit of a mess, but they're here," although his tone was soft, there was an edge of displeasure in it. "We know about the fight, so we thought we would give you the choice of whether or not you wanted to see them." You nodded your head weakly. "Bring them in." Luke whined and lightly pulled on your hand. "B-B-But MC! It's their fault you were out there! How could you possibly want to see them after all of that?" His eyes were wide with both desperation and confusion. He couldn't understand how you would want to see people who had caused you so much pain. He couldn't fathom why you would want to see the men who shared the same infernal species as your attackers. He didn't know why you would rather their hellish presence over his angelic comfort. But you did. You wrapped your arms around yourself as you answered. "I don't care what they did, right now. At the moment, all I care is that they're here, which means that they must have some level of concern for me. Right now all I want and need is my significant others to hold me and tell me that I'm going to be okay," you looked over at Simeon with water-lined eyes as you pleaded. "So can you please bring them to me. We'll sort the rest out later. Right now, I just want them by my side."

Simeon's lips parted in shock of your words and, for a moment, a flash of disappointment flickered across his eyes before it was quickly replaced with acceptance. The angel smiled gently at you before placing a kiss on the top of your head. "Of course, little lamb, I will fetch them right away." From your right, Solomon let out a heavy sigh as he squeezed your shoulder once more. Simeon merely had to unlock the door, before your lovers came tumbling into the room. They all rushed over to you, quickly blanketing you in hugs, kisses, and frantic apologies. While you were buried in the chaos, Simeon sadly smiled at the group before leading both Luke and Solomon out of the room. You shushed your boys and felt your heart warm at the feeling of being in their arms once more. "Apologies can come later," you began, causing Beel to whine in protest. "We have a lot to talk about, yes. B-But right now, I just want you guys to love me and hold me," your bottom lip began to tremble as you choked on your tears. "I-I know that I'm asking for your attention, once again. A-And I know that having to share me with each other is a-a-a lot but-" You were cut off by Mammon pulling you against his chest and burying his face in your hair. "I never should'a said any of that, treasure. I was wrong. S-So fuckin' wrong." Lucifer pressed a kiss to one of your inner palms before placing it on his cheek. "But, it's as you said. This is a conversation we'll have when you're ready. For now, will you allow us all to love you unconditionally, just as you deserve?" You could only nod, as sobs overtook you once more. You were held in every direction. Kissed on your wounds, as though the magic of your love could heal the damage that was done. Praised in the gentlest and most affectionate of whispered. Caressed with hands so careful and attentive, that you would think they were holding the world. And if you asked the lords, they were. Things weren't fixed, and they weren't perfect, but for the time being, you didn't need them to be. For now, you were all together. You were all loved, and you were all alive. And just for now, that was enough.

***There you have it, folks! That is A Pain You'll Soon Regret. I plan on writing an epilogue that will probably touch on the discussion they all need to have, MC getting their new leg, and potentially Diavolo? I haven't decided on him yet. The epilogue probably will be another couple of days, but in the meantime, I hope you enjoyed this sob fest. Remember to take care of yourself and to be kind to one another. Love you all -B*** TAGLIST: @obey-mes-treasure, @holygarm, @sufzku, @rivera-tickles, @angelprotectress, @theother4, @ester-is-here, @bissshitsu, @drsquishysquich, @leviathan-is-a-pretty-name, @zxlaki, @mammons-wife, @letsblazewolf, @levislui, @gallantys,

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burhouse · 3 years

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Colossal Wreck, Boundless and Bare Not the start but not the end, a telling of Ozymandias’ arrival.

----

As Wilbur woke up, he swore he could still feel the sword in his chest, dividing his muscle and bone and draining him of life. He swore he could feel cold metal seeping the heat from his limbs, reducing him to a corpse. However, when he opened his eyes, not even a gaping hole stared back at him, and certainly not blood.

No, he was somewhere entirely different from the button room.

Broken shutters covered a window near the end of the couch he was laying on. The sliver of light that fell from them landed on a purple vase, illuminating three flowers.

Red, yellow and blue.

Wilbur ground his teeth together. Clearly, someone was mocking him, whoever had saved him. Whoever would’ve wanted to save him. He had never seen this house before on the server, which left him on edge.

The floor was a dirty, black carpet, and the couch he sat on was red, and the walls were an infernal blue. It was sky blue though, not the blue of deep rivers, but still. He couldn’t stand to look at it.

He slid off the couch, feet coming to rest on the floor. It all felt solid enough, but some part of him wondered if, when he stood, it would all fall away.

Could he really have survived a chest wound like that? Could he really have survived being cut open?

The door creaked, and Wilbur involuntarily flinched back, leaning heavily into the couch and scrabbling for a hold.

Someone stood in the doorway and as they stepped closer Wilbur felt his blood run ice cold.

Clad in jeans, a yellow sweater and a red beanie stood his past, a L’Manberg jacket snug around their waist.

“Oh. Hello!” The demon had even copied his voice. “I uh- sorry if I startled you. Oh god you’re probably so freaked out right now. My name is General- well that’s my nickname. I’m actually named Wilbur Soot, just like you. We all are.”

The demon smiled, almost apologetically.

“We?” Wilbur spat, and General nodded.

“We. There’s currently 10 of us! Though I guess you must make number 11.”

How fitting that his hell would be made up of himself. The perfect torture really.

And all his life he thought there wasn’t a God.

“So uh- got any nicknames in mind?” General asked, shoving his hands in his pockets and trying his best to look casual. His face betrayed slight worry though, worry that Wilbur had once worn.

It really was like looking in an out of date mirror.

“Nicknames?” Wilbur echoed.

“Yeah! Like I said, my nickname is General. It's just so we can differentiate from the original- oh- we’ll get into that later.” He spoke so… calmly. Like a camp counselor. It made Wilbur’s blood burn and boil.

“And what if I don’t? Don’t choose one.” He snapped.

“Well, then someone will probably assign one to you?”

So be it then, but Wilbur wouldn’t play into this hell.

“Fine.”

A pause.

“So You’re going to pick out a name or-?”

“No. I won’t.”

“…Ok. Well uh. Wanna come meet the others?”

Who knows how long he would be here, how long he would have to be stuck with this shadow at least. As much as Wilbur hated it, it would probably be smart to go along with this creature and meet whatever other things would be haunting him.

That way maybe, he could prepare himself against them better.

Offense is the best defense, or something.

“Ok.”

“Alright- Right this way!” General smiled, slipping his hands out of his pockets. He beckoned with his right before turning into the hall.

Wilbur considered slamming the door and locking it for a moment, barricading himself in here, hiding under the couch-

What would that do though? Save him some minutes from these hellish beings at most? No, he had been right the first time. It would be smart to get to know these demons sooner rather than later.

He slid off the bed and slowly followed General, casting last glance to the vase before closing the door to that room behind him.

#wilbur soot #pogbur #philza #burhouse #blood tw #wilbur soot fanart

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luxekook · 4 years

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the golden boy | jjk

» pairing: phys. ed. teacher!jk x biology teacher!reader » genre: enemies to lovers, smut » summary: the new physical education teacher insulted you the moment you met him, and you’ve given him hell ever since. if only you didn’t think that he was the most beautiful boy you’d ever seen and that he was so much fun to play with. » word count: 2.5k » warnings: 18+, cursing, switch!jk, dom!reader, jk says something dumb, sexism, reader is a bad bish, jungkook is whipped, declarations of ownership from kook lol, smut (slight noona kink, oral (f receiving), biting, hair pulling)

» request: @jeonstime said: JUNGKOOK + COCKTAIL PLZ

as part of the bangtanhq drinks and drabbles challenge

“And this is Dr. (Y/l/n), the head of our science department and biology teacher. You’ll be working closely with her to create the Sexual Education curriculum,” Principal Kim introduces you to the newly hired P.E. teacher. “(Y/n), this is Jeon Jungkook.”

You nod at this new arrival, extending your palm towards him. Jungkook is attractive as hell, if you’re being honest with yourself. Your eyes flick over the lean muscle of his body and the wide-eyed beauty of his face. It’s too bad you are swearing off men for the time being after a particularly bad first date last week.

“I thought you would be a dude,” He mumbles after a long pause, looking you over in confusion. Your nostrils flare as you rescind your hand before Jungkook can even move to shake it.

“And why is that?” You fold your arms in front of your chest. You have faced incredulity before from a plethora of men - and women - about your chosen career path. Most women and minority groups in STEM fields have. It is part of the reason why you have forgone the route of lab work like a number of your fellow doctoral graduates in favor of high school education. You want your young students to feel empowered to become epidemiologists and astronauts and brain surgeons no matter their gender, their race, their sexual orientation.

And you want to eradicate the exact kind of reaction that Jungkook is giving you. Your glare is ice cold and absolute as you pin it on him. Kim Namjoon, your principal, is facepalming from beside this new boy and is looking at you with pleading eyes to diffuse the situation. But, fuck that noise.

“I-I don’t know?” Jungkook finally blurts out, running a strong hand through his mess of chocolate brown hair, “I’m sorry, (Y/n).” His cheeks are flushed prettily, and you almost cave. You almost assure this Jungkook that his remark is nothing new. You almost begin to picture tugging him into the hidden closet on the third floor and— You cut off that train of thought.

“That’s Dr. (Y/l/n) to you, Mr. Jeon,” You turn to leave, pausing briefly to look at the duo of men over your shoulder, “Welcome to Bangtan High School.” With that, you stalk down the corridor. Your heels clicking emphatically as you leave the infuriatingly handsome and ignorant new hire in your dust.

You miss the longing sigh and the heart eyes that Jungkook sends after you. You miss Namjoon placing a hand on Jungkook’s shoulder and saying, “You royally fucked up, kid.” And you miss the way Jungkook scrunches his nose and pouts forlornly, “I know…”

The beginning of the school year arrives the following week. On the first day, you make sure to pick an impeccable first day outfit that screams ‘I’m a fucking badass bitch, and I will end sexism as we know it’. Of course, it’s an impossible task for any outfit to achieve, but your knee length black dress and black Louboutin heels come pretty damn close.

When you enter the doors of the high school at 6:30am, you look ready to kill. And when you lay eyes on Jeon Jungkook exiting the teacher’s lounge with a steaming hot mug of coffee looking like a snack, you think you just might. As soon as you start down the hallway towards him, Jungkook looks up at you and subsequently chokes.

You smirk, maybe you wouldn't have to get your hands dirty after all. “Morning, Jeon,” You sashay past him to enter the lounge he just exited. Unfortunately, he follows.

“G-good morning, Dr. (Y/l/n),” Jungkook says softly from your side as you prepare your own cup of caffeinated bliss, “I wanted to apologize for last week.”

You face him, eyebrows raised as you wait for him to continue. He blushes under your undivided attention and mumbles, “I’m really sorry. I realize that I sounded like a complete sexist asshole, and that isn’t me. I hope we can start over?”

God, he’s giving you the most adorable puppy-dog eyes you’ve ever seen. His curls are in complete disarray once again with one falling just so perfectly over his forehead. It’s honestly unfair that he looks this good at this infernal hour. Just for that alone, you let him sweat for a few more minutes as you turn back to finish making your coffee.

Finally, you address him, “Apology accepted.” He smiles widely, his eyes gleaming, and he opens his mouth to say something. You can’t have that. You place a finger over his plush lips and move closer to him, “But let me just say this. If you ever, ever say something like that in front of my kids, I will end you.” You grin wickedly up at him as you try to ignore just how good his lips feel under your finger and how much better they would feel on your—

“Good morning, Jungkook! Good morning, (Y/n)!” Vice Principal Kim Seokjin scurries into the teacher’s lounge somehow looking like he just woke up and stepped off the runway at New York Fashion Week simultaneously. “Happy first day of school!”

You pull your hand away from Jungkook’s mouth, grab your coffee, and head towards the door. “Back at you, Jin. Bye, Jeon,” You kick open the door with your heel and shoot them a small smile on your way out.

You miss the way that Jungkook adjusts himself in his low slung track pants. You miss the way Jin shakes his head amusedly after your departure and tells Jungkook, “That one’s a hurricane wrapped in a deceivingly cute package.” And you miss the way Jungkook nods absentmindedly as he licks his lips, ideas forming in his head…

The first weeks of school always fly by for you with new faces to learn, new courses to prepare, new material to deliver. You love every minute that you spent with your students.

But, you hate every last second that you spend hearing about the amazing new P.E. teacher and how handsome and sweet he is. It seems that everyone, aside from you, is completely whipped for Jungkook. Even your own students bring him up in your classroom, telling you about the new physical fitness regimen he has them on and raving about how cute he is.

Don’t even get you started on how much you despise seeing Jungkook in the hallways, in the teacher’s lounge, in the cafeteria. He seems to be everywhere you go, almost as if he tracks your location. He even pops his head into your classroom during your free period to say a shy, soft ‘hello, Dr. (Y/l/n)’ that sends you into a feral state each time.

Fuck, what is it about him that makes you go insane? One day last week you had even walked past the gym and had stopped dead in your tracks at the sight of a sweaty Jungkook wiping his face with the hem of his t-shirt. It had been a whole lot of abs and a whole lot more fuel for your fantasies.

It absolutely doesn’t help that you constantly catch him staring at you - your body, your legs, your mouth. You had even overheard him ranting to the media teacher Kim Taehyung about how sexy you are when you ignore him, how he wants you to like him, how he longs to please you.

You are at the absolute end of your tether - especially because you and Jungkook are supposed to begin constructing the Sex Ed. curriculum together soon. Just the thought of discussing anything sexual with the boy gives you way too many dirty ideas. You decide that you might as well just rip the bandaid off so to speak, and so the next time you spot that curly head of his wandering past your classroom after school, you gesture for him to come in with your pointer finger.

Jungkook’s eyes widen as he stumbles into your classroom. “Shut the door, please,” You say, getting up from your desk chair.

“Am I in trouble?” He jokes as he follows your orders. You glare at the tempting expanse of his back, his tapered waist, his tight ass.

And so you cannot resist teasing him. “Hm, do you want to be in trouble with me, Jeon?” You smirk at him as he faces you once again, his throat bobbing as he swallows.

“Maybe,” Jungkook mumbles. He fiddles with one of the rings on his fingers, a nervous habit no doubt.

You slowly walk towards him, your hips swaying. Stopping inches away from him, you grab his hand to stop his movements, “You’re a restless little boy, aren’t you?” You flip his palm over and place your hand in his, reveling in the size difference.

“W-what are you doing, Dr. (Y/l/n)?” Jungkook looks at you like he isn’t sure if he should run or kneel at your feet. You hope you can convince him to choose the latter.

You shift closer to him still and bring your mouth to his ear, “I’m playing with you, Jungkook.”

A whine bubbles up from his throat, “Say my name again. Please. I’ll do anything.”

You drop his hand and step away from him. Moving back to your desk, you prop yourself up on it and cross your legs. Your pencil skirt rides up just enough to show the garters of your tights. Jungkook chokes. You grin.

“I know you will, Jeon,” You continue to smile as he scowls at the use of his last name, “I heard what you said to Tae. You want to please me?”

Rather than be embarrassed like you thought, Jungkook swiftly approaches you and sinks to your feet. How divine. He gazes up at you with a mix of lust and hope, “Yes, more than anything, Dr. (Y/l/n).”

You slowly uncross your legs, giving him a glimpse of the lace that lies underneath your skirt. “Call me (y/n).”

His eyes widen further than you thought possible as he nibbles on his lip, “O-okay, (y/n).”

“Good boy,” You purr, reaching out to run your fingers through his hair. Jungkook leans into your touch, sighing.

Hesitantly, he looks up at you, his pupils blown out, “Can I touch you, (y/n)?”

“I suppose,” The words barely pass your lips before his hands are on you. His touch is tentative at first, running his hands slowly up your calves. He surprises you by placing a soft kiss to the inside of your knee, and for once you’re mad at yourself for wearing your favorite garter set.

His touch becomes more assured as he moves higher, his fingers digging into your thighs, his mouth placing hot kisses higher and higher. And before he can move his fingers over your panties, you tug his head back with your hand tangled in his hair.

“I don’t think I gave you permission to touch me there, Jungkook,” You frown, feigning disappointment.

His pout is fierce in response, “But, (y/n), you’re so wet. You smell so good. Please let me taste you. Let me make you come. I’ll make you feel good, I promise. Please.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” You sigh, “I can just call someone else who I already know will make me come hard.”

Jungkook bites your inner thigh, and you moan before you can stop yourself.

“You’re mine,” He glares up at you, “You’re my scary smart noona. Your orgasms belong to me.”

You push him backwards by placing the sole of your heel on his forehead, “And when was this decided? And why was I not consulted?”

“It was decided as soon as you looked at me,” Jungkook says like that should have been common knowledge, “And I didn’t tell you because I thought you would reject me.”

“And you don’t think I’ll still reject you?” You arch an eyebrow.

“No,” Jungkook grins, his hand coming up to grab your ankle, “I think you like me.” He tugs your leg over his shoulder, bringing you closer to him. His gaze flicks between your pussy and your eyes.

You roll your eyes at him, “You’re so infuriating. I can’t understand why I like you, but I do. Despite your terrible first impression, your annoyingly cute ass has gotten my attention.”

Jungkook’s grin is blinding, “So you do like me!”

“Against my better judgement,” You sigh, your lips twitching as you can’t help but stare fondly down at the smiling boy between your legs. “Now, are you going to please me, baby? Or just stare?”

Jungkook lunges forward, hitching your thigh further over his shoulder and pushing your underwear to the side. Barely pausing to breathe, his hot mouth is on you, closing over your clit without warning. You hum in pleasure, and Jungkook pauses to grin up at you.

“So responsive, noona,” The honorific rolling off his tongue, “And you taste so delicious. You’re so wet for me—”

You groan, “Jungkook, for the love of god, shut up and make me come.”

Jungkook sends you one last shit-eating grin before his tongue returns to lick at your pussy, up and down. His mouth finally returns to your clit, sucking it between his lips and swirling his tongue around it.

Your hand once again winds its way into his curls, pushing him harder against you. He moans into your pussy.

The sight of the boy you’ve lusted after and slightly hated for so long being tongue deep in your pussy practically pushes you over the edge already. God, why hadn’t you done this sooner? You think to yourself as Jungkook brings his fingers up to your folds and parts them.

His tongue sinks into you, your hips buck slightly against his face. His other hand comes around to steady you - and to grab your ass. Jungkook’s tongue flicks in and out of you, and you feel the heat building up.

“Jungkook,” You moan, hand tugging at his hair, “Harder, baby.”

Your words have their desired effect as he replaces his tongue with two of his fingers and places his mouth back on your clit. You moan as his fingers curl inside you, the rings cool to the touch as they brush your walls. You come with a gasp. Jungkook continues to fuck you with his fingers and his mouth, carrying you through your orgasm.

He licks up everything you give him, and when you gently push him off you, he licks his fingers clean. “Well?” Jungkook leans back on his heels, “Are you going to need to call anyone else after I made you come like that?”

“That depends,” You laugh, “Are you going to keep making me come like that?”

Jungkook nods, his gaze dead serious as he says, “(Y/n), noona, you’re never getting rid of me after that.”

“Oh my,” You tease, “Whatever did I get myself into?”

And his answering smile is breathtaking.

#bhqdrabbles #bangtanhq #ficswithluv #networkbangtan #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #hyunglinenetwork #kwritersworldnet #bangtanarmynet #btsbookclub #btsnoonanet #jungkook x reader #jjk x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook fic #bts smut #jjk smut

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queenlilith43 · 4 years

Text

Alrighty so here is my stupid, stupid theory about the Wicked Powers and the Eldest Curses.

I'm adding a keep reading option because everyone will thank me for this later. And it contains serious Eldest Curses and Last Hours spoilers. (YES. I will drag Chain of Iron into here because I want to.)

So I want to talk about what I think the antagonists in the Wicked Powers and what will happen because of it. And how the antagonists will show up.

So who do I think the antagonists are? Whelp, here's the list:

Thule people

Faerie court drama

The Cohort

Lucifer + other permanent threats

I'm going to explain the antagonists and what I think will happen. I will explain how much of a problem I think they will be.

Thule

Well, Janus is going to be in there. He had established himself as a villian from Ghosts of the Shadow Market. He's what Jace could have been if he had stayed under Sebastian's power. That is to say, a very evil Jace.

Janus had been tasked by the Seelie Queen at the end of Queen of Air and Darkness to find actual Jace Herondale. Do we want Jace kidnapped? NO. Will this cause problems? YES.

Thule as a world is a problem. Part of it leaked into our world in QOAAD, causing the warlocks to start to turn into demons. (Including a very cute purple poodle that was Malcolm Fade.)

Shadowhunters can't use their weapons and runes in this world. I wonder if it was able to influence the Shadowhunters in this world enough to stop that.

And Sebastian is still alive in Thule. We know how much of a problem he is. If he ends up in our world . . . We should be worried.

I think Thule can be a problem. It might be a huge problem. It all depends on how easily the main characters can deal with Janus.

I personally want then to deal with Janus and Thule by just yeeting him into a Portal. I can imagine Kit doing that and then dusting off his hands.

If someone can get rid of Thule easily, things will be fine. If Thule isn't dealt with early on . . . Everyone is screwed.

Faeries

We have met the First Heir of the courts. Also known as Kit Herondale. We also have the Seelie Queen, who is very evil, ruling over the Seelie Court. Along with that, Kieran is ruling the Unseelie Court.

And as we know, the Seelie Queen made Janus try and find Jace. So she ties into the Thule plot.

I feel like there is going to be some major faerie drama. Kit is going to have to fight to unite the courts, whether he wants to or not. It is his destiny to do this.

The faeries wouldn't accept Kit as their king, because he's mainly a Shadowhunter. (As we know, Shadowhunter blood breeds true.) I am hoping Kieran emerges as the king of the new courts and is able to have a good life with Cristina and Mark.

Kit is going to have face his faerie side and the powers that come with it. I'm going to love seeing his character develop through all this.

The faerie court drama is going to be in there, and part of Kit's character arc. It is needed, and if Kit and Kieran get rid of the Seelie Queen fast we might not even have to THINK about dealing with Thule.

However, this plot will need at least two books to resolve itself. That means Thule and the faeries will be involved. I'm going to touch on Thule at the very end again.

The Cohort

Ugh, I hate these guys. Especially Zara, who is the one person everyone in the fandom wants dead.

Considering what the Cohort represents and everything that had happened, they are going to reach new heights of evil. That was already in the playing cards, but I just KNOW they'll be worse than we thought they were going to be.

And the Cohort is trying to hurt the Downworlders. Alec is over there, trying to help them, but the Cohort loathes him for that.

I really don't know how important they will be. But when I talk about what I believe a main plot will be, and how Shadowhunter-Downworlder relations factor into it.

Lucifer

This one is where the Eldest Curses ties into the Wicked Powers. And this is what I think is going to be the main antagonist after a certain point.

Before you question me on this, hear me out.

The Shadowhunters have always known they will face an end to the world. It's been an idea since the very first book, City of Bones.

Jace talked about how there were more demons coming in every year, and less Shadowhunters to fight them. This was in the FIRST BOOK. And of course we had bigger fish to fry, but it's an idea that stuck with me.

I feel like even in the Infernal Devices series everyone knew there would be a demon threat so great the world could end. It wasn't as obvious, because Mortmain wasn't an antagonist that posed a large problem. His clockwork monsters were easy to defeat, and it was in Britain, which is technically an island. So they couldn't go they far unless they hopped on a boat and sailed around the world. Along with Mortmain just being a mundane.

In the Last Hours, the idea of a demon threat that could end the world is even more real. In Chain of Gold, we had to deal with demons that attacked in broad daylight, something that had never happened before.

And there was Belial, who might be planning something that messes with their weapons. (Although he won't get far. He's a terrible, even laughable villian who is being set up like this for future reasons.)

Now we have Lilith, who is a danger to this world. With Cordelia as a paladin, Lilith could have enough power to mess with the world. It's more real, but with this being a prequel, we know things will be fine.

Back to the main series, the Mortal Instruments. In the latter half of the series, Lilith shows up, and mentions her past. And this includes Sammael.

Sammael is a Prince of Hell. He poses a threat to the world. He is the one who weakened the wards in the first place with Lilith to let the demons in.

Thankfully, Simon turns Lilith into salt. We don't have to deal with her, but the threat and the demons she knows remind us how fragile this world is.

After Lilith, we have Sebastian. His demons blood makes him unstable, and he created this army of Endarkened Shadowhunters. But was his existence a threat to the fabric of the universe itself? Not really.

It could think our world, but not in the way an actual demon could. He is powerful, but Sebastian loves in pain. The demon blood in his veins weighs him down, and he has weaknesses. Clary defeated him once, and she can deal with Thule Sebastian later.

The Dark Artifices introduced the concept of the world ending. Not with Malcolm, but with Thule. Thule was a real Hell dimension, a place where the demons have taken over. A ruined world, and one where Sebastian rules over the land with an iron fist.

The only way Sebastian was able to rule over Thule was because Lilith showed up at just the right time. And strangely enough, it was shortly after she was lost from our world. Coincidence? Well, it could be, but knowing these books, it probably isn't.

In the Eldest Curses, this idea was introduced just a little on the first book. Asmodeus was there. It was a flash of it, but it seemed like the demon threat was mentioned.

The second book mentioned that idea again, with Sammael showing up. That's right. Sammael, the Once and Future Devourer of Worlds.

He really seemed to show the threat of demons. The way that no matter how hard the Shadowhunters would fight, the demons would win in the end. It said in that book Sammael would destroy the worlds in the end, no matter what.

And oh my god the epilogue. He had all the Princes of Hell in a room. And now, they are going to summon Lucifer.

Why do I think Lucifer will be outside the Eldest Curses? Because he is important.

In the folklore (my inner Swiftie is showing) Lucifer is the angel who started the rebellion in Heaven. He looked into the face of God, and turned away into the darkness. He is a force to be reckoned with.

But what happened to him? We haven't even heard of him in the Shadowhunters universe until Chain of Gold, where he was confirmed as a Prince of Hell. At first, I thought Sammael was Lucifer, because that is one of his names.

But they're two different demons. And one is more powerful.

Because Lucifer hasn't even been mentioned before, I think his sudden existence is going to be in the Wicked Powers, along with the rest of the Princes of Hell.

Belial is being set up as this whiny, sexist demon to make the other Prince of Hell so much WORSE.

The Wicked Powers is supposed to be a threat that the Shadowhunters have never faced before. And the LITERAL DEVIL? Yeah, they've never dealt with a force like him before.

But the only way the Shadowhunters can defeat the demons once and for all is by teaming up with the Downworlders. It's been hinted at. When the Shadowhunters and Downworlders work together, they are able to fight the demons off.

This is where Clary's Alliance rune comes in. Her rune, binding the Downworlders and the remaining Shadowhunters together, and they will fight.

The Cohort is going to hate this. But it's the only way to deal with Thule (which I'm going to talk about in another post) and Lucifer is with the Downworlders.

And Magnus if ping to be important. Every time Magnus is there, the Shadowhunters win.

But one my other theories is that Magnus dies. Because this is the end, and Magnus is in every single book. So for him to die, it would mark the very end.

So I guess Magnus would fight bravely in the battle and then die, to make an end to these books.

Any thoughts on this? Please reblog!

#the last hours #the wicked powers #tsc #chain of iron #the eldest curses #its crackpot time now #chain of iron spoilers #the shadowhuter chronicles #tlh #tec #magnus bane #alec lightwood bane #alec lightwood #magnus lightwood bane #clary fairchild #kit herondale #kieran kingson

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yellowocaballero · 4 years

Text

Human Relations Snippet: Tim teaches Jon the internet and odious goats are sacrificed to the cult of Bezos

There’s no reason for this to exist. I was rereading a bit of HR and I saw a throwaway joke about Jon wanting to buy Martin a Portal Gun. I started wondering about how that would even work. The answer is, obviously, a 200 year old man squinting at a computer screen wondering why there’s so many horny singles in his area. I get possessed by demons easily, so I took three hours out of writing my daemon au and wrote this instead. Bon Appetit.

(Edit, quick clarification: I think that Jon would refuse to use the name for the Beholding that Smirke made up, and although all of this exists in my head and you guys don’t know this, there was a lot of tension between Jon and Jonah’s ‘circle’. So Jon hated Smirke and thought he was a hack. He uses Smirke’s terms to others sometimes for ease of understanding or in deference to Jonah (:/) but I think that mentally he mainly calls the Beholding his own name, The Witness. It rings of that personal and intimate connection Jon and the Beholding has. Anyway, onto the story.)

After one hour in anguished uncertainty, fifty popups that advised Jon of very many ‘hot singles in his area’, six separate sites that Jon’s God had to inform him were covers for thieves that stole money from you, and a very confusing retreat to Jon’s favorite internet page ‘Wikipedia’ as to what an Amazon was, Jon had given up.

Normally this was where he asked one of his personal assistants for help. Normally, he wouldn’t even be trying, and he would have just told one of them to do it. This was how Jon had cunningly mostly avoided using computers for the past twenty years. Some endeavors were unavoidable, and Jon was proud to say that he mastered email in 2010. Or was it 2008? He liked to think it was 2006, but it was possible...never mind. If it was important, the Witness would tell him.

Peter Lukas was right on almost nothing, Jon thought disgruntledly as he slammed his laptop shut - including in his taste of men, company, philosophies, men, patron deities, professions, and men - but he was right in his proclamation that the internet was the degradation of society. Not that he hadn’t sacrificed his morality and sold out, feeding his patron through something called “incel forums” and “Reddit”. Between him, Jonah’s “Excel spreadsheets” and “TurboTax”, and Annabelle Cane’s ridiculous “MMO guilds”, the Society was filling with computer geeks. Jon could always read the wind: he had to keep up, and quickly.

Besides, Martin had kindly educated him on how it was almost unheard of for a young man like Jon to not understand how to work that Goggle thing. Giggle? Martin was very streetwise and was one of the most insightful people Jon had ever known, he was definitely right.

Which is why he had to buy him this “Portal Gun” that he wanted. He had even shown Jon the website! And if Jon was in desperate times trying to navigate these confusing webpages entirely with URLs he memorized, then he would take desperate measures!

“I’m going down to the Archives,” Jon said, slithering off the couch and clutching his laptop to chest. Jonah had bought it for him. He appeared surprised that Jon was using it. “I may not be back for a while. I need...a book.”

Jonah didn’t look away from his own infernal machine. It seemed he was on that ‘Excel’ program again. Was it one of those ‘video games’ he kept hearing about? “Do I want to know what you were doing on that laptop.”

“Reading Wikipedia,” Jon said immediately, and somewhat defensively. Jon had discovered Wikipedia in 2001 before promptly funding it and throwing his weight behind its development. He had spent a solid five years convinced a computer was a kind of electronic screen that let you read digital Encyclopedia pages, like in Star Trek. He’d seen Star Trek. Georgie made him. “Did you know that -”

“Yes, yes, have fun. Haven’t you read that entire site already?”

“Not even,” Jon said defensively. “I can’t just sit and read through entire Encyclopedias anymore, Jonah. We know more things now.”

“What a way to describe the last two hundred years,” Jonah said, not even looking away from his computer. “We know more things. Never change, Jon.”

“You’re the one who never changes,” Jon grumbled. But it was a weak comeback, and considering his brand new delightfully short stature somewhat untrue, so Jon breezed out of Jonah’s office with full knowledge that he’d think of a better comeback halfway down the steps to the Archives.

In fact, it wasn’t until he was at the door, and by then he felt stupid for losing a point against Jonah anyway. He easily opened the door, stepping inside and quickly bee-lining for Sasha’s office. Her burgeoning powers were wonderfully flowing in the shape of access to and understanding of technology. He had never seen such gratuitous breeches of privacy as she casually committed. Every day Jon was validated in his decision to save her from the Stranger. A balance, an equal yet opposite Archivist from Jon, would be invaluable. Not that Jonah and Jon weren’t their own yin and yang, but Jonah’s powers were paltry and out-of-date. Mind reading and spying through iconography was so 1960. They needed fresh blood.

Sasha had been a wonderful choice, and Jon didn’t regret choosing her to act as saviour. Most of the time. Some of the time she -

“She’s not in.”

Jon’s fist halted in front of the door, about to sharply rap on her office door. He turned around to actually look through the bullpen, only to see that Timothy was sitting in his chair chewing a sandwich. Somehow angrily. Definitely suspiciously.

“Are you sure?” Jon asked dubiously. “Because you’ve lied about this before.”

“Because you should stop coming down here and bothering her.” Timothy balled the saran wrap in his hand and dunked it in the trash can, somehow undoubtedly giving the impression that he wished it was Jon’s head. “Just bugger off.”

Someone was in a snit. Normally Timothy wasn’t this hostile. Jon had thought that learning his name might make him less mean, but it did little to help. But when Jon looked around he didn’t see Martin, and a quick check assured him that both Sasha and Martin were having lunch at their favorite deli and engaging in that plotting hobby they both enjoyed. Timothy had elected to stay behind, stewing in his own angry and paranoid juices.

He would have to do this with Martin out of the Archives...and he really wanted to take care of this now so Martin would get it before the weekend...and it wasn’t as if Jon was scared of this boy he was one hundred and seventy years older than…

“Uh,” Jon said intelligently, “can you help me with...something…”

Timothy’s face twisted in a novel combination of surprise and disgust. “What,” he sneered, “your evil fear god or whatever can’t figure it out for you?”

“I don’t need others to think for me,” Jon said stiffly. It was something he’d had to say far too many times. “The Witness is less helpful with...troubleshooting...look, do you know how to work a computer?”

Timothy stared at him blankly. “Like, at all?”

“I’m trying to buy Martin this toy he desires,” Jon said desperately. Fuck it all, he walked over and sat down in the chair next to Tim’s desk. He pulled a little bit closer, placing his laptop on Tim’s desk, and ignored the way the other man leaned away. “But whenever I try I keep on seeing alerts about hot singles. I’m not interested in young women, I just need to buy a ‘Portal Gun’. Do you know what a Portal Gun is?”

Timothy continued staring at him, eyebrows raised. Clearly involuntarily, so quick that he may not even have noticed, one corner of his lips was ticking upwards into a smile.

“How many credit card scams have you fallen for?”

“Absolutely none,” Jon said, very quickly. He pulled out his credit card, placing it on the table. He knew a credit card was involved, although he didn’t know how. “What do I do? Do I swipe it? Is there a port?” He picked up the laptop and squinted at its sides, looking for a port. “I wanted to ask Sasha for help, since she’s the expert in hacking, but surely you know the basics?”

“I mean...I can’t, like, code, but yeah, I can work Amazon.” Timothy carefully opened the laptop, watching the display light up. He effortlessly navigated to an icon on the screen, clicking it open.

“That’s not right,” Jon said urgently. “You’re supposed to press the E.”

“I do not want to know how many toolbars you have,” Timothy said bluntly. “We’re using Chrome. That’s another way to look at the Internet.” He rubbed his hands together. “Yeah, I got a grandmother, we can do this.”

Jon perked up. “So you’ll help?”

Went unsaid: even though you hate me?

“Whatever,” Timothy grumbled. Jon decided not to press his luck.

Jon decided that he liked the Chrome better than the Internet Explorer, because it was simpler and Google was on the first page. Tim rapidly typed on ‘Amazon.com’ into the search bar and easily scrolled through the very busy and picture filled page that immediately popped up. Why was everything so fast? Maybe this was why the young people had no attention span: these pages just came up immediately. No flipping for indices for finding anything in phone books.

“Right. What was it, a Portal Gun? Like from the game?”

“A board game?”

“Video game.”

“Like on a VHS…?”

“Right.” Tim pinched the bridge of his nose. “You know, Sasha said that you’re one of the most famous sociologists and anthropologists in British history.”

“I am extremely intelligent, Timothy, and I won’t abide any insinuation otherwise,” Jon said curtly. “I cannot be expected to keep constant track every time there’s another - iPhone or whatever. You have teenagers in your family, correct? Do you always know what they’re talking about? That’s, what, a twenty year age gap? Multiply that by ten.”

That shut him up. Timothy sighed again, much more aggressively, but he clicked the white bar and typed in ‘portal gun’ anyway. “Right. Not fucking apologizing, but right. I still don’t fucking know what ‘Twitch’ is.”

“It’s a brief spasmodic contraction of the muscle fibers,” Jon said helpfully. “Fascinatingly, this phenomenon was first observed in frog’s legs before I was even born in 1780, by Luigi Galvani. Erudite man, by the way, but he couldn’t hold his liquor. It was the birth of the study of bioelectricity, although the exact mechanism of muscle contraction eluded scientists for years.”

“Never mind.” Timothy sighed again, the perfect mix of aggravated and long-suffering. It seemed to be the man’s two favorite emotions. “My grandmother has a PhD and she still can’t figure out her cell, either. We had to get her a Jitterbug.”

Amazon, as Timothy explained, was a kind of shopping mall, except you could pick out what you wanted by its picture and have the shopping mall pack it up and send it to you. Jon didn’t quite understand why people preferred this to just going to a shop yourself, seeing as you could get it immediately instead of with a three or four day turnaround, but Tim explained that Amazon was cheaper, had a wider selection, and didn’t make you get off the couch.

“Oh,” Jon said, finally getting it, “this follows the economic model of large scale businesses underpricing their products to undercut smaller businesses in the area, driving them out of business until they hold monopoly over the market and can raise their prices without worrying about staying competitive.”

Timothy stared at him.

“I mean,” he said, “I guess?”

“This explains why my Alexa project was successful so quickly,” Jon mused. “With a lack of competition or alternatives, consumers are more likely to accept the dramatic invasions of privacy as normal. Normalizing intrusions into privacy took ages, but my early efforts paid off very well. The Ring doorbell was even better, along with the line of security and home protection systems. We’re now working on live streamed 24/7 surveillance to social media platforms.”

Timothy stared at him further.

Finally, he said, “Alexa was...you?”

“Of course,” Jon said, baffled. Who else would it be? “I gave Jeff the idea and convinced him it would be profitable. I didn’t understand the whole mechanics of it, but once I gave Jeff a vision from the Witness he was eager to implement the divinely inspired spyware.”

Timothy continued to stare.

“The evil fear god controls Jeff Bezos.”

“He thinks I’m a prophet, actually,” Jon said helpfully. “I let him become Cardinal of the imaginary cult in exchange for funding some of my more esoteric programs. Had him sacrifice a goat and everything, it was great.” At Timothy’s alarmed look, Jon was quick to elaborate, “It was the most evil goat you’ve met in your life. Morally odious.”

“...for my sanity I’m going to pretend that you said none of that.”

In retrospect, although Timothy had worked at the Institute for a few years, it did take quite a bit of time to acclimate to the fact that the Avatars permanently shaped the shape of human existence in order to better feed their gods. Jon knew better than anyone: when humanity made gods, and gods made man, and man made gods...the feedback loop could self-perpetuate for years. Eternity, if needed.

But they had no luck on ‘Amazon’. With Jon’s eidetic memory he was able to easily pick out the one that looked most similar to the one that Martin had showed him, but all of the little toy guns were for someone named ‘Rick’. Then Timothy took twenty laborious minutes explaining the entire plot of ‘Rick & Morty’ to him, which Jon patiently sat through.

“I think young people today deeply enjoy explaining media,” Jon said, once Timothy finished telling him the funny jokes. “I’m very interested in your interests, Timothy.”

“You are so fucking condescending. And please call me Tim, you’re sounding even more like my grandmother.” When Jon brightened, Tim - Tim! - quickly said, “This does not mean we are friends.”

Granted, Jon had never once in his life gave a shit about making friends, but he felt as if he should be making more of an effort with Tim. He was a sort of supernatural brother in law, wasn’t he? Although Sasha perhaps Sasha was more of a favored niece. At least, he would be, if today’s generation found some morality and stopped living in sin.

Good lord. Now he was sounding like Jonah. Georgie used to joke that he was born in the wrong generation - he should have been born a 17th century Puritan instead. Jon found it a very funny joke. Jonah did not.

“Are there any other shopping websites?” Jon asked finally, after Amazon failed them. He’d have to call up Jeff later and complain. “Or is this the only one?”

Tim sighed. “Let’s check Google.”

Quickly and efficiently, yet with many lightning fast detours, Tim found another site called ‘eBay’ - pronounced ‘e-Bay’, not ‘ehbay’ - that listed off exactly what they needed. They weren’t under the toy section, instead listed as something called ‘cosplay’, but Tim seemed highly resistant to explaining that one, so he dropped it.

They picked a likely looking white toy gun that looked the most similar to the one that Martin had liked and Tim talked Jon through punching in the numbers on his card into the website and sorting through the billing and shipping information. Tim helpfully took down the numbers on his card to file later.

“And...done!” Tim said, pressing a button and leaning back. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

“It was ten times as complicated as I thought it would be,” Jon assured him, “but also much more fun. What else can you buy online?”

“Oh, god. What can’t you buy.”

Jon brightened. “Can you buy books?”

“Old Gertrude used to buy Leitners on eBay,” Tim said dully, “so yeah, sure, why not.”

Jon stared at his computer. He carefully navigated the mouse to the big red x and clicked out of the internet browser. “That’s enough of eBay, then, I think.”

Guess he would have to stick to buying Leitners in person. It was no good buying fucked up books from sketchy sources. Always stick to people you trusted, or at least trusted to be themselves. Mikaele was Jon’s favorite supplier since the kid Leitner disappeared, and they had a pleasant working relationship. Mikaele shared his grandfather’s stories about the history and culture of the Maori, and Jon told him which of his haunted artifacts would be the most helpful in the imminent apocalypse.

“Well,” Tim said finally, gently pushing Jon’s laptop away, “that was...something, great bonding session with my local supervillain, please run back to Elias and bother him instead.”

“You were very helpful, Mr. Stoker,” Jon said, as professionally yet paternally as possible. Tim was six years older than his body, so he’s not sure how it came off, but the touch of grey at his temples helped with the dignified air. “And as soon as you start acting like a man and propose to my Archivist, you’ll make an excellent brother in law -”

“Uh, excuse me?”

Jon spun around in his chair to see Sasha and Martin standing at the door, holding doggy bags and looking somewhat flummoxed. Probably confused at the sight of him and Tim having a civil conversation, which admittedly had never happened before. Possibly also confused at how completely mortified Tim looked.

“Who said anything about proposing?” Sasha asked incredulously. “Tim, are you -”

“No! No, god no!” Tim stood up quickly, holding his hands out as if he was placating a raging bull. “Nobody’s been saying anything - I would never do that to you -”

“Oh,” Sasha said frostily, crossing her arms and letting the bags swing, “would you.”

That was a domestic Jon should stay out of, even though he definitely caused it. He and Martin sidled away in tandem, huddling near the back of the Archives as Tim frantically pled for his life.

Sneakily, Jon glanced at Martin out of the corner of his eye. He looked happy. Happy, and just as stressed as he always looked - Jon had never known Martin when he wasn’t constantly stressed out, and he was more than aware that it was his fault.

He looked good, too. Really nice, broad jawline that gave his face a friendly round shape. Just friendly and round in general, it was really handsome. His hair was as nicely short and ruffles as ever. The big glasses were super stylish, and really framed his face well. Really big, broad hands. Jon, who had always been so poky and tall and thin and gaunt, like some kind of haunted scarecrow that lurked through the corners of time, was envious. He wanted some of that softness and gentleness. Really, he wanted some of Martin’s -

“So what were you and Tim doing?” Martin asked. “I didn’t know you knew he existed.”

“You told me his name,” Jon said anxiously. “I don’t forget the things you tell me, you know.”

Martin smiled shyly and him, and Jon found himself smiling back. “It’s pretty good for my ego to hear that I have something to teach the immortal genius.”

“I don’t know,” Jon said, as Sasha yelled in the background, “I’ve been learning a lot lately.”

“Really?” Martin teased. “Anything interesting?”

“Oh,” Jon said, watching the yellow fluorescent light cast Martin’s dim smile in soft relief, “I can think of a few things.”

#my writing #jonathan sims #tim stoker #archivist!sasha #martin blackwood #sasha james #mild homosexual activity and massive old man activity inbound #tma #the magnus archives #tma fanfic #the magnus archives fanfic #im posting this at an awkward time so prep for a lot of self rbs

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lya-dustin · 2 years

Text

Someone will remember us

Chapter 20

Gif by: @fireandbloodsource

Taglist: @fyeahhotdocs @arrthurpendragon @stargaryenx

Cw: mentions of death in childbirth

He was not supposed to find her.

Stark must have been blessed by his gods because the Maiden’s Gambit was foolproof.

Aemma hides her horror with a charming smile.

He is handsome in a solemn way, and now Aemma knows that her family is aware she has inherited her mother’s taste in men. He has a nice smile and he is a good man, but Aemma knows he will never be the one who owns her heart.

Cregan is a good dancer, charming if a bit rough around the edges. Reminds her of a raw diamond.

Where Aemond is sleek and polished to sharpness like a freshly cut stone, Cregan has the roughness of nature.

“I confess I had help, your highness. Your lady grandmother, the Princess Rhaenys sent me a portrait of you and note saying you would wear indigo as her blessing.” Stark admits.

“Well, that is certainly news to me, my lord, and here I thought fate has brought us together.” Aemma is angry, not at him. She is angry at her grandmother for foiling her plans.

“She meant no ill and neither do I, my princess. I apologize if I have offended you in any way.” He is a gentleman, doesn’t surprise her, her grandmother had a good eye for men.

“No, you have not offended me, Lord Stark. I was just surprised that it was my grandmother who sabotaged my game that is all.” Aemma wished this dance included the rest of the courtiers, it would give her an excuse to gather her thoughts and see how to proceed.

They spin with a circle with one palm against the other’s. It is a northern dance, mother had brought a northern dance master to teach her all of them, but this one is only reserved for lovers and spouses.

The singer was sent by the Manderleys and sings beautifully in the old tongue.

She is to learn it, a northern lady by the name of Rhiannon Dustin and one from the Riverlands, Alysanne Blackwood, are to teach her the Old Tongue and the worship of the Old Gods.

The princess isn’t expected to convert, but she is expected to raise her children in the three faiths: Valyrian, Andal and the First Men.

As he has an heir already, the children born to them will be given the name Stark and shed it when one succeeds Aemma on the Iron Throne.

But that won’t happen. Cregan Stark will leave the South with no princess, and Aemma will leave with Aemond to the Stepstones where grandfather will champion their cause.

Aemma can feel Aemond’s eyes on her even if she cannot see him.

If only the Queen Who Never Was had not conspired against them.

“They say you have a sweetheart, one who you refuse to name.” he said when the dance require them to step close enough to feel the warmth he radiates and Aemma has decided she likes him not.

To say that means that he has already heard the rumors of her taking after her mother.

Some have said she is no longer a maiden, that she lost her maidenhead at three and ten and that she is another Saera in the making.

“They say the maester asked you to choose between your son or your wife.” She hissed in response.

Queen Aemma had died like Arra Norrey did.

This Aemma refused to die like that.

They do not speak for the rest of the dance. An infernally long dance lasting a quarter of an hour.

----

“I hate him.” She whispers in High Valyrian to Helaena who giggles from the wine and whispers her verdict back to Aegon.

Things were better between her and Aegon, they were friends again.

Aegon will have his whores and Helaena will not be forced to have more children against her will.

Not that Aemma ever plans on forgiving him.

“He won your game, at least be a good sport about it.” Aegon points out avoiding saying it common so the man beside her doesn’t hear, he then turns to his morose younger brother, “What do you think, Aemond?”

The look in his eye is absolutely murderous.

He makes some noncommittal sound that speaks his immediate loathing louder than a shout ever could.

“Think you and Criston can make him eat shit at the training yard, little brother?” Aegon continues needling his brother until Aemond slams his wine goblet too harshly on the table.

“Aemee, would you care to dance?” he stands like a snake ready to strike and Aemma only nods as she took his hand.

He does not ask Stark if he is fine with other men dancing with her, why should he? It wasn’t as if she and Stark were betrothed even if he had won her game.

Aemond hates the pageantry of it all, hates the court dances marginally less than he hates Lucerys, but he always makes exceptions for her.

He has even enlisted himself in the tourney when he hates it and has only ever participated at the behest of his mother.

Perhaps if Cole’s training pays off, he will crown her his queen of love and beauty and show their families they will not be cowered into submission.

“He cheated, my grandmother told her I’d wear indigo.” She whispers in high Valyrian when they take their places at the head of the dancers.

“Doesn’t matter, you said you would marry the man who won.” He is angry, not at her, but at how he is denied his moment in the sun for being a second born son.

“I would marry you if only you would ask me.” She says just as the music begins.

“Our families would never agree to let us.” He argued. Always the dutiful son, if only he didn’t inherit that trait from his mother.

“Doesn’t matter, we are of age, well, I will be six and ten in a week. We petition to your father and force their hand.” She suggested as they begun dancing.

He is somehow a better dancer than Aegon who struts like a peacock half the time.

“You don’t understand, my father is too sick to be of use. Grandfather and mother rule in his name now.” His pessimism annoys her.

Its almost cowardice.

“Then if he cannot help us, we do what Jaehaerys and Alysanne did.” The dance has them lean in close but they stay there longer than they should.

She can hear the whispers already, but she doesn’t give a shit anymore.

He said nothing, but the Pearl of Dragonstone has heard his refusal all the same.

“Coward.” She whispered in common as the dance had them change partners.

-----

“Stark has heard the rumors, Lord Vaemond.” Hightower whispered to the man acting as the girl’s guardian.

“If he doubts her innocence then he is not worthy of her.” Vaemond narrowed his eyes as the one eyed prince spoke in whispers with Aemma as they danced.

It was a dangerous game the girl was playing.

The last thing they needed was for her to be a whore like her mother.

“A better match will not be found, both families have agreed on Stark. Even the King has approved of this Pact of Ice and Fire.” The Hand reminded him.

The girl was willful and bold, no man had survived the Maiden’s Gambit and he doubts Aemma will keep her strategy now that Cregan Stark has admitted his goodsister helped him cheat.

“There is a way to prove she is a maid still.” Hightower suggests.

It was a blatant humiliation he wanted. The Greens wanted for Aemma’s name to be lower than dog shit and make the Rapist Prince acting as King to take the throne.

Girls often lose their maidenhead to the saddle. An avid rider like Aemma could fail the examination and be ruined forever despite her being innocent as a babe.

If it had been Prince Aemond they had placed forward as Rhaenyra’s contender, then Vaemond would have encouraged Aemma’s infatuation with her half-uncle.

But a spare will always be the spare.

“I would desist from that plan if I were you, Lord Hand.” Vaemond warned.

“There is nothing to fear if she has not erred.” The hand is unrelenting in his pursuit of humiliating the little queen.

----

Stark is not wholly unpleasant once he apologized for insinuating she was not a virgin, and of course her apologizing for saying he killed his wife.

“My grandmother died like Lady Arra did, as have many women in my family. I suppose I have developed a fear of it, my lord.” She whispered and he nodded in understanding. “I do hope you can forgive me; it was such a cruel thing to say.”

He is a good listener, and while Aemma knows she has always liked talking, she knows when someone genuinely listens to what she says.

“You responded out of indignation, your grandmother warned me not to forget you are the blood of the dragon therefore of quick temper. My lady wife choose to give her life for our son and perhaps I hold some of the blame in her demise. She was my dearest friend when we were children and I promised her I would protect her always.” He confides in her and she knows whoever set them up together forgot grief was a thing with claws.

It is the oddest dinner conversation she has had thus far.

“I am deeply sorry for your loss, my lord.” She gingerly touched the crook of his arm in sympathy.

Maybe her mother and grandmother were right. Maybe they would suit.

But what about Aemond? Her heart asks.

Aemma can feel his anger from here, but if he cannot be man enough to stake all they have for their love, then maybe he is not the right man for her.

“I hope it is not too forward of me to ask, but, may I join you in the Godswood tomorrow morning?” she finds herself asking the one and twenty year old Lord Paramount of the North.

----

sorry but i love writing drama, before you ask Aemond and Aemma are endgame, just having fun from getting to point a to point b.

Cregan Stark is supposed to be Helaena's age, but I made him just a bit older than Aegon, because idk i imagine the show will age him up a little. also hilariously, since I am basing his appearance off Jon Snow/Kit Harrington, Cregan is just like one inch shorter than Aemma lol.

also just to remind yall, by westerosi standards Aemma is like a week away from being an adult and has consented to a possible romantic relationship with a fellow young adult. but i suppose it is pretty stupid to remind y'all when its this fandom I am writing in and this quasi medieval society has different rules lol

#aemma velaryon #asoiaf fanfic #house of the dragon #someone will remember us fic #asoiaf au #oc fanfiction #ocappreciationtag #aemond targaryen x velaryon!oc #fyeahhotdocs

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gothgirlbethany · 3 years

Note

Hcs for Judas? I wanna know more abt his strained relationship with religion

((alright the last one left, mostly written when i was half asleep lol))

original post

A-Realistic: Judas was one of the first kids to fall down to the Basement. He grew to hate God more than he already did when he saw the little 5-year-old Isaac stuck down there too. Judas brought with him his Book of Belial and some change, and his health was seemingly weakened by God. Both of them knew Judas sold his soul some time ago. Both of them knew this was a form of divine punishment.

Because his soul belonged to Belial, even when Judas died as an adult he still kept the benefits from the Book. It bound itself to the pocket knife he had on him, creating Dark Arts.

B-Hilarious: Complete COMPLEEEETE TSUNDERE. He's just better at hiding it than most. Don't get me wrong, he's still an asshole. But there was that feeling of pity when he saw Isaac naked and afraid, and when Laz was on low health and had no extra life and Judas took damage for him 'cause he was worried--oh! And let's not forget when Beth was cornered by a Shady and he used the last charge of his book to save her! And even helped her up and said he didn't wanna see her hurt!!! By GOD, the teasing he got from Lilith for that last one.

He also begrudgingly joined what Cain calls the Triple Threat--a group composed of him, Cain, and Samson--that Eve always called the Super Nerds. T.Cain wants to reform the group again and this time Judas is all for it while Sam's the one holding back. If they ever get back together Eve's gonna call them the Ultra Nerds.

C-Angst: Judas was one to often question God's actions. He never understood how God claimed to love all His children, then proceeded to drown them all in the Great Flood, punish a faithful man with death because he attempted to catch the Ark of the Covenant before it fell, mystically impregnate a 14-year-old with His son who was born to die a horrible death, among many other actions across both Testaments. Whenever Judas asked the sisters or preachers why God would do such terrible things to the ones He loved, the responses ranged from "God works in mysterious ways…" or a hostility he never thought he'd see from someone at a church.

Judas found that God and those who work for Him won't give him the answers he wants, and that God isn't as cool as everyone made Him out to be. Judas gained an interest in the occult at a young age. He discovered he agreed more with people and ideas that opposed God. And he found a way to make a pact with a demon.

He sold his soul to King Belial and was "blessed" with his accursed book (written in backwards Latin and ancient Hebrew) that Judas was able to read through infernal magic. He immediately got attached to it. He just couldn't stop reading it. The more he read the more his red locks fell out, the more resentful and solitary he became, the more he'd push away everyone, including his best and only friend.

Judas has always been a solitary person. But one day a really friendly kid named Jesús got him to open up and they quickly became friends. Everyone often joked about their names and that Jesús should watch out, but that just caused Judas to accept his friendship out of spite. He found that despite their clashing personalities they actually got along really well. This was the first time Judas felt like he had a real friend.

After he sold his soul he didn't want to be around Jesús anymore. But he was doing it for his safety. He didn't want to expose Jesús to the dark arts. He didn't want Jesús to find out and be afraid of him. But running away only made Jesús upset.

One day Jesús had the guts and approached Judas to ask if he'd been feeling okay. That he has been awfully skittish lately, and avoiding everyone more than usual and running off to read his weird new book. Judas says he's fine, just fine. Jesús asks if he's sure, only for Judas to angrily yell that HE IS FINE!

"I… I'm sorry… I've just been invested in this book, is all…" Judas says.

"But Jude…" Jesús says, "Those pages are blank."

Judas quickly gets up and runs away. And that was the last time he ever spoke to Jesús. It was an unintentional betrayal.

I haven’t decided exactly what causes Judas to hang himself as an adult. Obviously religion plays a part. Maybe he thought he’d die alone anyway. He has pushed all his friends and family away, and never thought he'd see Bethany or the other Basement kids again. Now that he's dead, even when he completes his trial he will never walk the Earth again and be sent straight to Hell.

D-my basement now: British. Fucking britboy. Do you understand how many beans on toast jokes hes gotten from Azazel. Do you understand how many times Cain has pointed out the r's hes put at the end of words. Do you understand that he and Beth call each other "Manc" and "Yank" respectively AND affectionately??? Fucking redcoat.

#ooc answers #ask game #anons

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wrenhyperfixates · 4 years

Text

The Gift

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: Tony says no pets in the Tower, but since when has Loki ever listened to him? Warnings: like one curse word A/N: Any Tom Hiddleston stans out there should get the Easter egg in this one :)

Disclaimer: Picture not mine

“Oh, come on, Tony! Please,” you whined for the fifth time that week. “Not even just a little one?”

“Absolutely not. It’d make a mess of the place. Not to mention that this isn’t exactly the safest place for a pet.”

“So it gets into a lab accident and we have a super dog. Not the worst thing ever,” you said, half joking, though Tony actually seemed kind of intrigued now. You changed your tactic before he got any ideas. “Besides, it won’t make a mess. I’ll train it. And not all dogs shed.”

“I guess, but someone might be allergic,” Tony countered, thinking he delivered a winning argument.

“We can get a hypoallergenic dog,” you shot back, though you’d already checked with almost everyone and no one said they were.

Tony grumbled, running out of excuses to give as to why you couldn’t get the pet you’ve been pleading for the past few months. Tony had become somewhat of a father figure to you during your time in the Tower, and you’d been pretty sure you could use that to your advantage. Sadly, though, nothing had been working. In fact, that relationship had been more of a detriment to you than anything else as you didn’t want to make him upset with you. Otherwise, you might just go out and buy the pet of your choosing. Maybe even more than one. Although, to be fair, it was Tony’s building, and he was allowing you to live here rent free, so you should probably just drop it. But you really wanted a pet, and you knew you weren’t the only one.

“Sorry, but still no.”

“Fine,” you relented with an overdramatic sigh. “For now, anyway.”

“Thank you,” he said, going back to whatever he was tinkering with before you came in.

You pouted in the lab for a bit, hoping he might change his mind, but to no avail. Eventually you slinked out and went into one of the common rooms, plopping on the couch between Peter and Bucky.

“So, how’d it go?” Peter asked after popping a handful of Skittles into his mouth.

“No luck," you responded sourly, stealing some of the colorful candy from him. “None of my strategies are working.”

“What if we tried for something smaller?” Bucky offered. “Like a gerbil.”

“I guess,” you grumbled as you flopped back in exasperation. “But we’ve had our eye on that Cocker Spaniel for a while. A gerbil just wouldn’t be the same.”

“Yeah, I know.”

You all sat in silence for a bit and watched as Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck argued about what hunting season it is, mulling over the situation. Admitting defeat seemed to be the most likely option at the moment, but you hated to just give up when you were sure there was a way to get what you wanted and not have Tony be upset with you.

“I’ve got it!” Peter suddenly shouted, bubbling with excitement. “We go and adopt it and then tell Mr. Stark that it just followed us home!”

“Except he wouldn’t let us keep it even then,” you stated, having already thought of that yourself.

“So we hide it. Simple,” Bucky chimed in. “By the time he notices, Peter will be so emotionally bonded to it, Tony wouldn’t dare take it away.”

“Great idea, Mr. Bucky,” Peter said, high-fiving him.

“Yeah, if only there weren’t cameras everywhere. Not to mention a home system that tells him everything,” you added, growing more upset at the lack of options by the minute.

You pushed up from the couch as the episode’s end was heralded by Porky Pig’s “Th-th-that’s all folks.” After waving bye to your friends, you headed to your room to brainstorm in silence. The figure lurking in the shadows didn’t even register in your mind, so you had no idea that a certain god heard your whole conversation. Not only that, he was about to fix all your problems.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Mr. Loki, where are we going?” Peter inquired as he and Bucky were led into the city by the trickster god.

“All will be revealed, spiderling. I assure you.”

Bucky just shrugged when Peter looked at him, and so they continued following Loki through the busy New York streets. After hearing about your plight, he had hatched a plan to get you what you wanted. All it took was a bit of research on that infernal computer device, and he was pretty sure he’d found the right shelter. It was a far walk from the Tower, and since neither he nor his travel companions could drive, he resorted to taking the subway, an experience he’d rather not have again. Finally, they arrived at the destination, and Peter was about to burst with excitement.

“Mr. Loki!” he gasped. “This is exactly where we were looking for dogs!”

“But I have a feeling you knew that already,” Bucky said.

“Indeed,” Loki replied. “I must confess that I overheard your conversation in the common room yesterday.”

“Oh I get it now. You’re doing this for-”

“No time for speculation, we are here to get me a pet,” Loki interrupted, “Go on. After you, spiderling.”

Peter, still blissfully unaware of Loki’s true intentions, led the way into the shelter. They were greeted with the sound of happy barking and the distinct smell of dog treats. Loki had to admit, he wasn’t the biggest fan of animals. He found some to be more agreeable than others, such as a good steed, but overall he thought them to be more of a nuisance than anything else. Thor had bought a cat for Jane once, and it tore up half of his capes before he presented it to her. Loki was glad his brother kept it away from him and his belongings. Not to mention he didn’t appreciate the sheer number of similarities people said he had with felines. Dogs, however, he was fine with, so long as they were trained properly.

“Hello, how may I help...” the girl behind the front desk trailed off, her eyes going wide with excitement upon realizing who the trio was. “Y-you’re... Oh my gosh. My friends are never going to believe this! But, uh, how may I help you?”

None of the heroes were particularly comfortable with the attention and star struck gaze of the girl, so it took them a minute to get over their sheepishness. Loki looked at both his companions before realizing he would have to do the talking. He sighed but knew the look on your face would be worth it. You’d look at him the same way you had so many times before, whenever he did little things for you, whether it be rubbing your shoulders after a stressful day or brewing you a cup of tea on a chilly morning. The two of you weren’t dating, exactly, but you weren’t exactly not dating, either. Loki found himself incapable of asking you to make it official, lest it ruin what you currently had. He didn’t know what he’d do if you no longer casually held his hand or rested your head on his lap while reading in the evenings. Even though he was fairly certain you felt the same way, that last bit of doubt wouldn’t leave him alone. Besides, despite usually being quite a great thinker, he couldn’t come up with a good way to confess. He supposed that kissing you would do the trick, but he wasn’t brave enough for that, so getting you a dog would have to suffice for now.

“My friends here were looking at some of your dogs recently, and there is one that they are quite smitten with. We are here to adopt it.”

“That’s right! A Cocker Spaniel named Bobby,” Peter offered. “He hasn’t already been adopted, has he?”

“Nope!” the girl responded in a perky voice. “He’s all yours as soon as you fill out the proper paperwork.”

“Mr. Loki, are you sure about this. Mr. Stark told me I couldn’t get a dog.”

“Exactly. He told you, not me,” Loki replied, picking up a pen.

“Well, yeah, but I don’t really think he meant it just for me. I think it was more of a general kind of thing.” Loki and Bucky looked at him in exasperation for a second, wondering how he could still be so innocent, before he caught on. “Oh, ok. I get it now. Carry on.”

The three boys huddled around the page as Loki filled it out, providing Tony’s credit card as payment when the time came. It seemed appropriate, Loki thought, that Stark should have to pay for making you upset, and taking that in the most literal sense was the only somewhat acceptable way, it seemed. No longer could The God of Mischief go around stabbing those who hurt the ones he cared about. In a way, he missed the good old days, as he referred to them, but his new life led him to you, which made the rest of it fine with him, he decided, as he finished his signature with a flourish.

“There,” he declared, admiring the loop of his fancy, cursive L. “Finished.”

The girl disappeared into the back, only to return with Bobby a moment later. After giving the paperwork a quick once over, she handed the leash over to Bucky, who couldn’t stop the smile from growing on his face. Peter immediately bent down to scratch the dark brown dog behind his ears.

“Who’s a good boy? You are! You’re a good boy!” he cooed.

“Spiderling, he hasn’t even done anything yet,” Loki said, somewhat perplexed, as Bobby rolled over onto his back, stopping at the god’s feet. “Though, I do suppose he is a rather good boy,” he added, an inexplicable smile tugging at his lips.

One stop at the pet store and a taxi ride later, both unknowingly paid for by Tony, they arrived back at the Tower with the newest member of their family. It wasn’t even ten minutes later that Tony strolled into the room where they were playing with Bobby. He stopped dead in his tracks as he noticed the dog, happily playing tug of war with Bucky.

“What is that?” he asked, pointing at the Cocker Spaniel.

“A dog,” Loki deadpanned.

“Yeah, no shit. I mean what is it doing here?”

“I adopted it. Really Stark, for a supposed genius you ask a lot of obvious questions.”

“Don’t get snippy with me, Rock of Ages,” Tony quipped back, gritting his teeth a little. “This is my Tower and I say no pets, except for maybe a goldfish.”

“Yes, this is your Tower, but it is our home, is it not? As thus, we should be allowed the simple pleasures of life, such as having a pet. After all, studies show that having a dog can reduce stress, something I’d say is rather important for people in our position.”

Tony glared for a minute, not really having a good response to that. Then he called your name, certain you were behind this.

“No, Mr. Stark,” Peter said. “They had nothing to do with this. Don’t blame them.”

“That’s right,” Bucky also defended you. “It was all us.”

It was already too late, though, and you appeared in the doorway. Loki had been planning on presenting your gift to you in some cute or clever way, but all he had time to do was a magic up a bow on the pup’s head, a green one, of course. Bobby started happily yapping at your arrival and trotted over to you, looking for a scratch behind the ear.

“Oh. My. Gosh. He’s adorable!” you exclaimed as he rolled over for belly rubs. “You finally got a dog for me, Tony? Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“Sorry, but I can’t take credit for this,” he said, turning down the hug you were offering him by putting a hand up. Then he pointed at the mischievous trio whose doing it was.

“Well actually, it was mainly Loki,” Bucky said, nudging the god in the ribs.

“But Mr. Bucky, we all- Oh wait. Awwww,” Peter gushed as he realized what Loki was feeling.

“Oh. In that case, thank you Loki!” you shouted, throwing your arms around him in a hug.

Without a second’s hesitation, he wrapped his arms around you, too, returning the embrace. “You are quite welcome, my darling.”

You nuzzled into the spot where his shoulder met his neck. In turn, he put his head on your own and breathed in your scent, forgetting the others in the room for a minute. It seemed you had, too, because you looked equally startled when Tony cleared his throat.

“Ok, fine. He can stay,” Tony conceded, “but only if he doesn’t wreck the place. And keep him out of the lab.”

You all chorused your thanks and, despite his harsh tone, could tell that Tony had already taken to Bobby, who was now the center of attention again. After playing with him for a bit, Bucky made some excuse about having to leave and took Peter with him, both of them wanting to give you some alone time with Loki.

“This really is very sweet, Loki,” you told him after a few minutes.

“Think nothing of it. It is my gift to you.”

“I feel bad, though. I don’t have anything for you,” you said, biting your lip. “Well, actually, I do have one thing that I can give you.”

“Oh? What would that be, my darling?”

The end of his sentence was nearly cut off by your lips crashing into his. The kiss was a little sloppy, but filled with so much love and desire that neither one of you cared. After gathering his wits, Loki kissed you back, cupping your cheeks as you grabbed his shoulders, still a little unsteady from surging forward.

“That,” you breathlessly whispered, pulling away as Bobby began barking again.

Later that night, Tony found you and Loki passed out on the couch, Bobby sprawled out across both your laps.

“Huh,” he mumbled, draping a blanket over your shoulders. “I guess it’s a good thing they got that dog, after all.”

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phoenixyfriend · 4 years

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The “Momma Sturmvoraus was Literally Satan” AU

As requested by @spazzbot. This AU was initially brainstormed on the GG fanworks server almost a year ago. Specifically, on the first day of 2020.

[ID: a truncated discord message by “Miss Nixy, Gay for RoboLadies” posted 01/01/2020. The message reads “I need to sleep but please for the moment consider:” and ends there.]

So. Let’s get to it.

Satan took a human form because why not see what's going on topside, live like a human, and “Oh shit is this pregnancy? This is pregnancy. Fuck, that's a tiny human. Which is now half demon. Am I supposed to take care it? Wonder if retconing this form into that Valois family was a bad idea. They do have SO much money though, I get to live like a queen. I suppose another child shouldn't hurt, it wasn't that bad. Oh, he's cute, this is actually making sense, why humans do all the sinning. Not counting dear Aaronev's murders, of course, those are just evil, but I did search out the worst of the humans to pair myself to...”

This is literally just "Tarvek and Anevka's mom was low-key Satan on a bored “let's be human for a decade or two to see what happens” jaunt, consequences happen because these kids are LITERALLY half-demon and arguably anti-Christs."

Also it's just Very Funny for Tarvek, ineffectual sexy lamp fashion twunk extraordinaire, to be an antichrist

Jeff thinks he’s pretty. Jeff keeps describing features that don’t entirely make sense. (Jeff’s canon name is Karl Thotep but they spent so long unnamed that the server collectively named them Jeff.)

This is not a crossover with anything, btw. Ambiguously Pop Culture Satan just got bored and went to have babies with a serial killer.

They’re just kids! That are vaguely demonic. So. Moreso than the rest of the Valois.

Sometimes "mom" comes back from the dead and visits Anevka and Tarvek to impart Wisdom and possibly magic lessons The rooms always smell faintly of sulfur after that...

They try to put Anevka in the machine but SHE isn't hurt and the MACHINE just melts

So that's the end of that.

It's very awkward for everyone, but the paperwork isn't too bad. It's very easy to write "incidental fire began during late-fugue experimentation, resulted in fire spreading through six rooms and several casualties, including Prince Aaronev Wilhelm Sturmvoraus."

As per @atagotiak, “I feel like if we’re going in any way dimensional weirdness with thing, Tarvek got so good at exploring bc he could just clip through walls.”

With image provided by @thisarenotarealblog:

Tarvek in Paris: My dead mother keeps showing up in my dreams to tell me I need to seduce my way out of my problems and also she looks like Satan. Tarvek's Voltaire-Appointed Therapist: I still don't know what that means. Just like the last five times. Tarvek: I keep telling her that I can’t seduce Colette, if seduction is that important she should get Anevka to do it.

Like he probably wouldn’t say most of that in front of any Voltaire-approved individual, but still.

Tarvek is still very good at self control but there's a Special Edge to his rants.

(Derailed in the moment to me thinking about Anevka in a sfw-but-concerningly-deadly succubus getup, because... yeah.)

Aaronev dies and goes to hell and his dead wife is just there like "hi! Time to be tortured for eternity!" He wasn't a good husband so. He can't exactly sentimentalize his way out.

“In the sexy way?” “... not for you, no.”

Mostly I just want the BULLSHIT that is "Storm Mom was actually just Satan getting bored and going on vacation as a retconned Valois girl, the kids are half-demons and sometimes it Shows."

To clarify: the Satan bit isn't the retcon. Grandma used to have one daughter. Now there are two. (Seffie and Martellus's mother doesn't remember being an only child, but sometimes...)

Satan retconned a new daughter in, which included a Valid Valois Venusian Vestment, so the blood tests play out.

The subtle signs of wrongness would be fun too. Anevka tends to smile a bit too wide and sharp for a human face. Inexplicable uneasiness, here you can’t point at any specific thing that’s wrong but it’s uncomfortable. Uncanny valley prettiness, almost like the porcelain she became in other timelines. Skin isn’t supposed to be that smooth.

My brain's pre-nap contribution at that point was "Satan's pronouns when not pretending to Human are sin/sinself" which is! Certainly a thing.

Tarvek, at some nebulous future point: I mean, your ancestors were monsters, but my dad was a serial killer and my mom was literally Satan, instead of just figuratively like Lucrezia, so. I mean. I kind of get what you're going through.

Per @firebirdeternal: Tarvek and Anevka growing up with "you're allergic to holy water" and not questioning it until a little later because What.

And then they test it and it's like "yeah, no, there's a rash now. That stung. What the fuck."

It INFURIATES Gil in Paris when Tarvek tells him that's a thing, because there's nothing chemically different about Holy water and regular water. But no, this is somehow happening.

It gets logged in medical journals as a Valois genetic thing because, well, Mom was like that too, right?

One time they both go into a church for an Adventure and Gil is very annoyed to find that Tarvek is like. Faintly smoking. It smells like burnt hair in here.

Gil: What smells like burnt hairgel? Tarvek: [glares]

Gil decides that it must be something particular to the church, like a fungus or something in the stone, contaminating the air and water so it only LOOKS like the holiness is what's setting off reactions.

It is not.

Tarvek once got into an argument with someone and ate a slab of raw, completely uncooked meat as a power move.

SVV seems to work perfectly. Everyone is fine. We get the ‘you fight like ducks’ moment.

And then Tarvek bursts into flames, and everyone panics because no they fixed this what the fuck is he still infected with Hogfarb’s oh my god... and then everything settles down and he's perfectly fine. Not a scratch on him, no longer turning funny colors. Completely unharmed. He's in a nicely tailored suit and looks faintly stunned

"I just met my dead mom, who's apparently Satan. She told me that after I died the first time just now, I should be harder to kill later, especially with fire, because now there's more demon and less mortal and guys I think I'm going crazy." "Is that a martini?" Tarvek looks down. "Apparently."

Tarvek starts just. Randomly setting things on fire by glaring too hard and has to tone it down. Meanwhile, Agatha and Gil are having crises about how he's somehow getting PRETTIER.

Is he faintly glowing? Maybe!

Gil handles it by angrily sniping at Tarvek about how of COURSE he's an evil little rat with a background like that.

Tarvek just wants a nap and to forget this ever happened. Many people are sworn to secrecy. It's very awkward.

Still, SVV did something, for handwave-y reasons, and so they're linked now. Gil and Agatha both getting tiny flashes of the same shenanigans.

They get none of the powers. They just keep getting Weird Shit.

Other characters with divine influence are like "Did you.... did you make a pact with a demon?" "What no that's our boyfriend."

Tho tbh I wouldn’t be surprised if a Heterodyne did sign a contract with a demon at some point in exchange for like. Materials. A hundred souls sacrificed in exchange for some succubus blood. Thanks!

Tarvek and Othar: Falling out of CW as in canon. Tarvek: WHAT THE HELL SINCE WHEN DO I HAVE WINGS HIDE THIS BEFORE I GET BOOTED FROM THE LINE FOR THE THRONE

IDK where Anevka is during all this. I think she might have decided to go sleep her way through the courts of the Ice Tsars. Vacation, y'know?

Othar after he's decided to make Tarvek his new Heroic Apprentice: AH, my poor afflicted young friend, it's noble of you to go against the dark nature of your tragic heritage like this. Tarvek: I hate you. I wish I could hate you to death. But you have a point. I shouldn't let my father's blood limit what I strive for in life. Othar: I... I thought your mother was... Tarvek: I know what I said.

Tarvek: Also you can't tell ANYONE about that, I can't have them thinking I'm not actually in line for the Storm King's throne.

He does admittedly have to like. Explain things to Grandma.

Terabithia is Tarvek’s maternal grandmother so this is supremely awkward. That said...

Grandma fondly remembers her pregnancy cravings; bone marrow and sulfur.

"Yeah so, my mother, your daughter, was... maybe actually Satan? But retconned into your life?" "Tarvek, darling, please. I figured that out half a century ago."

TARVEK ACCIDENTALLY FINDS HIM HIMSELF WEIRDLY INTENSE AT CONTRACTS

I mean that honestly just Tracks about Tarvek anyways? But like moreso.

He just. Writes something up and there's things getting signed or shook on and then the person tries to break the contract and either suddenly catch fire or are deeply unlucky for a set amount of time.

And Tarvek's just standing there like "how in the FUCK did I do that?"

Severity of infernal punishment depends on the severity of the breach of contract.

Tarvek finds out that Anevka's been convincing rich people to sign their souls over to her. It's a fun challenge. She keeps them in jars.

They can still remotely pilot their bodies but like. They can't TELL anyone what happened.

Satan: I'm going to go make babies and now everyone else has to deal with the consequences.

Anevka's living up to that whole "princess of hell" vibe. Tarvek's just like "nope nope nope I want the storm throne, not the hell throne, BYE MOM."

Satan's just feeling sinself down in hell like "awwww look at my babies go, aren't they adorable?"

Tarvek: Anevka, what... first off, how did you figure it out? Anevka: Well, I temporarily died when father put me in the machine, and... I can't say that hell kicked me out because they were afraid I'd take over, but mother DID say she'd rather I play about with human governments instead of Hell's. Tarvek: Okay, cool cool cool. What after you planning to DO with all these souls? Anevka: They make for some lovely reading lamps, don't they?

(Anevka absolutely sets herself the goal of acquiring new titles that rival her old ones, or even surpass them. She just black widows her way through Europa.)

I just want someone (probably Snackleford) to ascend, take one look at Tarvek, and run SCREAMING.

Tarvek still needed to be anchored to Higgs, because Tarvek is Baby.

Gil is eventually in a relationship with an Eternal God Queen and the Literal Son of Satan.

Family dinners can include ALL the in-laws if you duck down to hell! - You borrow Bill from... probably heaven, maybe purgatory. - You have Lu and Aaronev and Satan already there, though the first two... well. Aaronev and Lu get invited to dinner but they have to eat by themselves at the kiddy table and nobody talks to them or acknowledges their presence. After all, this is hell, and what better punishment for Lu than to be completely ignored, and for Aaronev to see Lu at her worst and be reminded that he gave everything for this horrible, horrible person who isn't even pretending to care about him anymore. - Zanta and Klaus get invited via portal. - Anevka saunters in with a blood-soaked dress and a complaint about militant demon-hunters refusing to let her go shopping for a new pair of shoes. - Zeetha tagged along with the OT3. (She can't wait to see this situation explode.)

Oh God, Satan is actually second place as far as good parenting goes.

Well, actually, fourth. Because Adam and Lilith. But second as far as bio parents go. 1. Zanta 2. Satan 3. Klaus 4/5. Lu and Aaronev N/A. Bill

Someone (Anevka) decides to stir the pot and invites Von Pinn, Terabithia, Bang.

Bang is basically Gil’s older sister, right? Right.

This is Zanta meeting Bang for the first time! Zanta is just: "It's so nice to meet my husband's adopted daughter." Klaus freezes. Bang freezes. Gil is the only one who is just. "Yeah." Meanwhile Zeetha is crying with laughter off to the side because both of them deserve this. (Zanta would legit love Bang though.)

Agatha: Tarvek, I think DuPree is-- Tarvek: Hitting on my sister? I know. Agatha: On your mom, actually. Tarvek: NO!

Also I do love the idea of like. Nobody tells Bang they're inviting her. She just wakes up in Hell like. "Ah. Yes. Fair enough."

Satan: Oh no no no my dear, you're here as a guest. Besides as well as you'd fit you're not one of mine, you've got other things waiting for you. Bang: Okay, but I love the decor. And is that Cheesecake?

Bang’s family has their own evil god in the novels, but! Bang DID pick on Tarvek a lot in Paris. Satan cares more than Anevka does. Bang might get the sexy punishment.

I feel like the fact that no permanent damage was done and it taught Tarvek a lot of things means Satan isn't gonna be all that upset about it.

And let's be real, if there's a character in GG who could look the literal Christian devil in the eye and be like "Yeah I tortured your kid, what're you going to do about it?" it's Bang.

Even Satan doesn't know what to do or think about Othar.

He sure is here! As Anevka’s arm candy! Nobody knows what to do except Anevka herself, who just wants to be Smug.

(What's that scene from Phineas and Ferb that's the mad scientist trapping the platypus within the rules of polite dining at a fine restaurant? Like he can't make a scene because that would be rude?) (That. Othar would dearly love to start a fight, but it's a Family Dinner. You're only allowed to fight verbally at those.)

(Othar isn't even fighting Satan, he just wants to argue with Klaus.) (And maybe fanboy in Bill's direction a bit).

#Girl Genius #Phoenix Posts #Anevka Sturmvoraus #Tarvek Sturmvoraus #Aaronev Sturmvoraus #Gilgamesh Wulfenbach #Agatha Heterodyne #Lucrezia Mongfish #Othar Tryggvassen #Bangladesh DuPree #Otharnevka #GG OT3

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ive-garden · 3 years

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Tag Game!!!!!

I was tagged by @hklnvgl! Thank you Dory!

How many books are too many books in a series? I don't think there is such a thing as too many books in a series as long as the author knows since the start how the story is going to progress (like dory said). I'm not really a fan of books that end in a trilogy, for example, and the author decides to write more because of the success or the pressure (it almost always goes bad for the story).

How do you feel about cliffhangers? They give me a little anxiety so I try to avoid it, but sometimes it's there without you knowing so, what can I do!? (I don't have the patience to wait for all the books to be published when I'm a fan).

Hardback or paperback? Like Dory I'm mostly buying Ebooks now because I don't have space in my house anymore and also because it's easier to read using Kindle! But I do buy the physical copy when the book is special to me and the hardback when the book is EXTRA special! But hardback is not really common here in Brazil, so I started with them now that I'm reading books in English (I do have a few in Portuguese though, very few, 3 or 4?).

Least favorite book? Oh my God, I cannot do this one because I have no idea the last book I didn't like!

Love triangles, yes or no? I'm not a fan but I don't avoid it either! I watch a lot of Kdramas and Anime and they ALWAYS have love triangles, so I'm mostly used to it! The last love triangle I read was a Korean manhwa named Love or Hate and for the first time in my life I didn't know who I wanted the guy to be with!!!!!! Both guys were awesome!

The most recent book you just couldn’t finish? Like Dory I mostly finish all the books I start and lately I'm very picky with the books I read, so it's been a while since I didn't finish one. But I remember not finishing the Fence novel because I wasn't vibing with it like I do with the comics.

A book you’re currently reading? Last night I finished Rare Vigilance by M.A. Grant. It's good. I'm in kind of a vampire vibe right now.

Last book you recommended to someone? The Song of Achilles! I recommended it to my friend because we both love M/M books and there isn't enough in Portuguese (she doesn't speak English, unfortunately).

Oldest book you’ve read? I have no idea!!!! Probably some of the books I read for school? I don't know.

Newest book you’ve read? Newest as in most recent published it was Infernal Sin by Ariana Nash.

Favorite author? I don't really have a favorite author like in I read everything they publish favorite but I do have a few that I know for sure I'm gonna like what they write. Dan Brown, Harlan Coben and Julia Quinn are a few names I remember from the top of my head.

Buying books or borrowing books? I do prefer buying! it's been a while since I borrow a book.

A book you dislike that everyone else seems to love? I'm sure there are a few but I can't think of one right now! Urgh!

Bookmarks or dog ears? Bookmarks! I have a box filled with them! I used to go into bookshops just to grab a few free bookmarks.

A book you can always reread? TRC and Harry Potter are the ones I read the most and the ones I always go back to.

Can you read while listening to music? It depends! I can't read while listening to music in English or Portuguese or even Spanish because I understand what they are saying and it distracts me. But I did find out I can read while listening to Kpop because I don't understand what they are saying! But I prefer not to.

One pov or multiple povs? Whatever, I don't have a preference.

Do you read a book in one sitting or over multiple days? It depends if I have the time and how good the story is! I did read Mister Impossible in one sitting because I mostly didn't work that day. And last weekend I finished the book More Happy Than Not in one sitting without even realizing it! And also finished A Surplus of Light in one sitting but this one just has a few 100 pages.

Who do you tag? No one because I'm super lazy today! :D

#disclaimer #this post doesn't have emojis because I'm using Tumbler on PC #and I don't know if you have emojis for pc #and I don't want to search for it #thank you for the tag Dory #always fun to do it #anyone who sees this and wants to join feel free #tag game

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gaeilgeoirgay · 3 years

Text

I’ve decided to start crossposting some of my one shots here sooo here’s “Hour Of Peace”. It’s set in @inexplicifics Accidental Warlord AU :)

Summary: Aleksander of Velen releases Aren and the Witchers of the Manticore School welcome him home

Ao3 Link

Onto the fic!

Merten wakes to a loud banging on the door to the room he shares with Leocadie. Beside him, his spouse wakes too, and Merten calls for whoever it is to enter. It’s Zenon, the eldest of the Manticore trainees.

“Sir, sorry for disturbing you but the White Wolf has ordered that the School Heads must gather. According to Jaskier, your presence is especially needed, Master Merten.” Zenon reports and Merten nods, already leaping from bed. “Thanks, lad. Get the Manticubs together for training- you’re in charge until I tell you otherwise.” He orders and Zenon nods.

He leaves to go rouse the trainees and Merten turns to Leocadie, who had watched the exchange languidly. “Right then, my love, I had better see what’s going on. Come with me?” Merten asks and Leocadie rises to stand in front of him. They nudge at Merten’s throat and Merten bares his neck to let Leocadie breathe in his scent. They do it every morning, as a reminder that although the two of them have outlived most of their cubs, they still have each other.

They dress swiftly, armour strapped on and swords sheathed. Merten has a feeling that the meeting will be about their conquering of Redania, and he would prefer to be armed and ready. Leocadie joins him as they stride to the White Wolf’s meeting room.

The Wolf is there, along with his lovers and a few of the School leaders. Merten takes his place at the table, Leocadie beside him. The Wolf looks furious and the scent of anger from the rest of his School is thick in the air. They seem to be the only ones aware of what the meeting is about but there’s a piece of parchment held tight in the Wolf’s hand and Merten has a feeling it’s the reason they’re here.

Ivar strides through the doors and sits, nodding to the Wolf. Artek follows him and that makes their Council. “Thank you for arriving so swiftly. Milena here received a letter from one of her contacts in Redania this morning. The old Duke Velen has died and Aleksander de Velen has taken his seat. He is the one who wrote the letter. Geralt will explain the contents shortly but Master Merten, I would prefer for you to know first.” Eskel Amber-Eyed says and Merten feels an eyebrow raise. He’s only ever been in Redania when he was on the Path. What there could possibly hold his attention?

The letter is passed to him and he unfurls it and starts to read. Dear Milena, the letter starts and Merten continues. Oh sweet Melitele.

“Dear Milena, My grandfather is dead and I have become Duke of Velen. I knew he was a monster but dearest sister, I could not begin to imagine the horrors he has allowed under his reign. There is a dungeon under the Keep and three mages in Velen’s employ. Some fifteen, twenty, years ago, a group of mercenaries in my grandfather’s pay brought down a Witcher. They left his Medallion for his people to find and presume him dead so that King Vizimir, his Mages, and my grandfather could keep him captive to experiment on.”. Here the writing becomes even shakier than it already was and Merten cannot stop himself from reading, even though he can only think of one Manticore who has disappeared in the manner described.

“The Witcher I saw beneath the Keep is named Aren of the Manticore school but he is not the only Witcher kept captive there. The mages wished to create more Witchers using Aren’s blood and imitate the Trials yours go through. Over the years, they have captured and experimented on one hundred and twelve young Redanian girls. Only four survived the false Trials. Sweet Melitele, Milena, I snuck into the dungeons last night once I learned of their captivity, and they are so small. The eldest must be nearing sixteen and she is as thin as a child of seven. Aren of Manticore is covered in scars, even moreso than your Witchers. His voice is shredded and I can only imagine the horrors that caused a Witcher to scream so.”.

Merten has to stop then, unable to read more about what his cub has gone through. Aren’s beautiful deep voice, shredded from years of screaming. He understands the Wolves fury but he feels grief, deeper than any ocean he has ever crossed. He leans into Leocadie, trembling. He feels tears prick at his eyes and for the first time in decades he lets them fall.

His anger rises in him too and he vows to rip the throat from the mages who have done this to his cub. To his cubs, for if Aren’s blood is the thing that changed them, it means they are Manticores. They are his.

The mages will die and Aren will be freed, his girls with him. He’ll bring his cubs to Kaer Morhen and show them a world in which Witchers are revered rather than reviled, a world where they are safe. He will reunite Aren with Theo, Fili, Gregor, Jinsan even and introduce him to Zenon, to Yori, to Rilanth.

The School of the Manticores is small, but they take care of their own. Merten and Leocadie have stood at its head for centuries and Gods willing, they will stand for decades more. They will bring their cub home.

The parchment falls from Merten’s hand and their husband collapses into Leocadie’s side, tears falling from his eyes. Leocadie is startled but they wrap an arm around Merten anyways, picking up the letter. They wonder idly what could have caused Merten such grief- the whole School is currently in Kaer Morhen, no one out on the Path so death is ruled out.

The Wolves watch them sadly but the other Witchers seem as surprised as Leocadie is. “Leocadie, may I have the letter?” Eskel asks and they hand it back wordlessly. Eskel begins to read it out loud for the benefit of the confused Witchers around him and suddenly, Leocadie understands.

Merten is the Head of the Manticore School but Leocadie is their teacher too. Aren was one of theyr cubs and Leocadie had been so proud when he lasted so long on the Path. He had supposedly died only a few months before the White Wolf came up with his madcap plan and the grief he felt for Aren was compounded by the sting of regret that he hadn’t lived long enough to see Kaer Morhen become their home.

Aren isn’t dead though. While Leocadie had been mourning and then healing and moving on, Aren had been chained in the dungeon of a Redanian noble, desperately trying to protect the girls imprisoned with him, bleeding and hurting even as Leocadie was training new boys and laughing with Merten. Gods, Gregor had brought Aren’s Medallion back to Kaer Morhen and Leocadie had taken it as proof that Aren was dead and never looked for him.

Leocadie has failed him but he has a chance now to make up for it. They will free Aren and dispose of Vizimir and Leocadie will work for the rest of their life to earn their cub’s forgiveness.

Theo stares in horror at the dungeon around him. There are four teenage girls in a cage to the side, all of them scarred and starved. And in front of him, Aren lies bound to a table, blindfolded. He’s covered in scars, and Theo recognises only a few of them. He’s thinner than the youngest of the Manticubs and Theo feels bile rising in his throat at the sight of his brother’s ribs, some of them clearly broken.

The two outsiders confirm that they’ll stand by the Wolf’s decision to execute Vizimir and Master Merten calls for Theo to help him free Aren. He steps forward and slides his fingers gently under the strap around Aren’s right wrist before breaking the leather with a grunt of exertion. He swiftly does the same to the strap at his ankle before moving back up to help Master Merten break the godsdamned collar the Redanians put on his brother.

He pulls a knife from his belt and very carefully slips it between the collar and Aren’s throat as Master Merten snaps the iron links attached to it. Fili undoes the gag as Theo moves to slice open the blindfold. Master Merten is at Aren’s head as he blinks slowly, adjusting to the light after the blindfold.

The old Master gathers Aren into a hug and Theo smiles as his brother’s arms come up slowly to reciprocate. One of the girls in the corner calls out to Aren uncertainly and the Manticore stands up with Master Merten’s help, hobbling over to the cubs.

Theo follows and grins viciously when Master Merten kicks the corpse of the infernal mage as he passes. Theo’s boot comes down on the dead mages hand as he walks over to the cage. He may be as dead as his fellow but Theo feels a little better when he hears the crunch of bone.

Esra of the Bears breaks the lock on the cage and the girls stream out, crowding around Aren. Theo watches in approval as one of them grabs the head of the other mage and smashes it viciously. She’s a great Witcher already- the Manticores will be the luckiest school in Kaedwen if Aren’s girls decide to join them. Though even if he and the girls choose to never walk the Path again, its enough for Theo to have his brother back. Anything else is a bonus.

Zenon balances a tray of food on his hip as he knocks at the Pride’s door. They’re still wary of the other Witchers and thus far haven’t wanted to eat in the hall. Fair enough, the Hall can be overwhelming sometimes. Zenon still prefers to eat with the rest of the trainees even though the oldest Manticore trainees are encouraged to spend time with their already graduated brothers.

Elena opens the door and smiles when she sees Zenon. “Thank you!” She says cheerfully when he passes her the tray. “No bother, milady. The kitchens said they would send up dessert later, but since it’s cold they didn’t want it to melt before ye got a chance to eat it.” He says, explaining the minor decrease in food on the tray.

Elena nods in understanding and Zenon bows shallowly to her before turning to leave. Some of the other trainees hate Master Sasha’s courtly training but Zenon rather likes it. His parents had been travelling merchants before they were killed by a kikimora and Zenon had spent some time with nobles who were interested in buying from them.

As he’s about to leave, he’s stopped by a call from inside. “Come here for a second, boy. I’d like to speak with you.” Aren says and Zenon turns back around. He takes a step through the door, looks to the girls for permission and is granted it. “What can I do for you?” He asks politely and Aren squints at him. “You’ve been delivering food up to us since we got here but you seemed familiar to me even before that. How do I know you?” The elder Manticore asks and Zenon smiles.

“I’m one of the eldest Manticore trainees, sir. I had just joined the School when we moved to Kaer Morhen but I wasn’t offered to the Witchers nor a Child Surprise. My parents died by a kikimora and you were the Witcher who slew it. You saved my life and brought me to the Manticores.” Zenon explains and Aren snaps his fingers. “I remember! It was one of the last fights I had before the mercenaries. I’m glad that you made it through the Trials.” He says genuinely and Zenon blushes.

“You must nearly be done with your training, then?” Aren asks. Zenon nods. “Yeah, I’ll go out on the Path next year. Hopefully, I’ll do the Manticores proud.” He answers and Aren laughs. His voice is ragged but stronger now than it was. “You’ve been trained by the best School, boy, of course you will! Let me know when you head out and I’ll see you off. Feels good to know that the tiny stripling I saved became a full grown Witcher.” He says.

One of the girls crowds a little closer. “If Aren brought you to become a Witcher and his blood made us Witchers, then in my opinion you’re part of the Pride. I’m Zia and I’d very much like to fight you, little brother.” She says decisively and Zenon splutters. “I’m older than you!” He says indignantly and Zia laughs. “I’ve spent this long being the oldest, I’m not giving that up for a damn boy.” She says stubbornly and Zenon considers her for a minute.

“How about you stay the oldest sister and I’ll be the oldest brother? You’ll still be oldest at something.” He bargains and she regards him curiously. “Hm. I’ll take it but I reserve the right to mess with your hair. It’s a fucking rats nest.”

Fair enough, Winise stole his comb and he hasn’t figured out where the little bastard hid it. “Deal.” He says, holding out his hand. She takes it and they shake on it, his new sisters watching on.

Zenon goes to grab his dinner from the kitchens and comes back up to share a meal with his sisters and his Finder. It’s nice- he’s got a few little brothers in the trainees but he’s never had a sister, let alone four of them. He suspects they’ll make his life hard sometimes but honestly, he doesn’t care. He plans on taking a leaf out of the Princess’s book anyways. He wonders if the girls will like geese.

(the answer is a very emphatic no and he finds that out the extremely hard way. Still, Zenon wouldn’t trade his sisters for all the geese in the world. Even if their idea of retribution includes spiders. Gods, he hates spiders.)

#the witcher #accidental warlord au #fanfiction

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