#gonna do a separate post where i break down every little detail i love about this but just know that it is perfect!!!!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

recurring-polynya · 11 months

Note

Hello polynya! Hope you don’t mind but I’d like to ask you about your writing process. You’re really one of the best fic writers I’ve seen so I’d like to pick your brain a little. :) How long do you spend outlining something before writing it down? What do you do when you get stuck on something? How do you make sure you’re getting characters right? I’m very concerned about that last one since I haven’t seen Bleach in years and if I ever started writing something, I’m worried I’d make everyone OOC.

Hi! Sorry for delay on this. I wanted to take the time to write out a nice and thoughtful answer and then I got swamped by stuff. I really do like sharing writing advice, though, so thank you for asking!

Just gonna do a little cut for length:

How long do you spend outlining something before writing it down? So, I want to start with the caveat that I hate outlining. I am very much that dog-with-a-frisbee meme, only it's "No decide what happens! Only write!" I think that, in general, it's best to do as much outlining as you can stand at the beginning of a project, but there is a minimum amount that I force myself to do, but what that minimum is will depend on the fanfic I am trying to write.

Sometimes a fanfic will spring into my head, fully formed, beginning to middle to end. Just go for it. No outline. Fuck it, we ball. Generally, this is going to be a shorter fanfic, like <10k, but I ran all of Portions for Foxes with no net. There is like the Touch of God, though, there is no way to guarantee this process.

Usually, with the stories in my Heart is a Muscle series, I declare that I am Writing This Thing, and it has a broad concept and, like, 5 scenes I really want to write. In this case, I will make an iterative outline. I really, really didn't feel like outlining the one I am working on now, and for a significant amount of time, my "Ductwork Notes" documents just said: "Outline: lol". However, as I actually started to work on it, and completed some scenes, I put them in the outline. Also, any time I thought of a scene I wanted to do, or a scene I would need to do, I added it to the outline. At some point, I was able to feel my way around the shape of the thing. It takes place over ~2 weeks, and I wrote out when the big events happened, which made it more obvious where and what I needed to add. I just continue to refine and add detail. I'm maybe 10 or 15% of my way into this thing (by progress, not by word count). As I go, I continue to update the outline. Eventually, I will break it into chapters, with word count. Going back and forth between the zoomed-way-in activity of writing and the big picture exercise of thinking about my story as a whole is the best way for me to work (it's also the way I code, swapping back and forth between writing and testing individual functions with how they fit into the overall software framework.) I feel like this is not a thing that would work for everyone, but it works for me.

Plot bunnies. We all get them. I generally do not get gripped by them, the way some people do, but every so often, I have a bit of a wild idea (often an AU), where I get excited over an idea, and I need to decide how much energy I am willing to devote to it. In this case, an outline is a tool for that. The thing that separates a plot bunny, imo, from a "fic idea" is that plot bunnies are usually open ended hooks: What if so-and-so died? Oh, I love this splash page where they're all in a band. That's not a story, it's just a concept. So, if I am considering making a story, I force myself to make an outline. It must have a beginning, middle and end. It must contain a number of Big Scenes I am excited about writing and that I think people will be excited about reading. Sometimes, this process very clearly informs me that this is not a story that I want to take the time to write, and that maybe I'd rather just do a fanart or write a 1k throwaway scene or maybe just make a Tumblr post about. But if the process of making the outline isn't a huge turnoff, well, now I've got an outline, which is a significant part of the work done, and I can feel free to go for it.

What do you do when you get stuck on something?

If I am stuck on a specific thing, the best thing for me is to go do a chore that requires my hands and leaves my brain free. Washing dishes, folding laundry, weeding, are all excellent candidates for this. It can be enormously frustrating to get stuck, because I am very impatient, so I have a litany of things I tell myself at these times, like "this is what writing is. just let your brain chew on it." I often try to let my brain run down little possibilities, even when I know they won't work, just to see where they lead. I try to remind myself to have fun and enjoy the process.

If I am stuck in the sense that I have writer's block or just generally don't feel like writing, I try to do other things. If I catch up on my ao3 comments and my volunteer job, then, when the inspiration comes back, I'll have a clear schedule. I believe that there are cycles of writing, where sometimes you are in creative mode, but sometimes you are in rest mode, and sometimes you are ingest mode, so it's good to go read a book or watch a new show. It's also cool to go revisit the source material.

How do you make sure you’re getting characters right? I’m very concerned about that last one since I haven’t seen Bleach in years and if I ever started writing something, I’m worried I’d make everyone OOC.

I mean, why not do a rewatch, or even better, read the manga? You don't have to go through the whole thing, just the parts relevant to the story you are trying to tell, or the character you are trying to get write. I do this all the time, even though I already have a pretty encyclopedic knowledge of the parts of Bleach I care about. The Bleach wiki is very helpful for figuring out what happened in particular episodes.

I think this ties back to the previous questions, but a big part of writing is that you have to sit with your writing in your head and figure out what you are doing and why and if you are accomplishing that. There are different ways of doing this that you may find you enjoy more or less. I don't like outlining, but I do like looking up little bits of canon and overanalyzing minor details and making esoteric Tumblr posts about them.

Once you are actually writing, I try to have a very clear idea for my major players of:

What is their tendency?

What is their goal?

Their tendency is what they do naturally, how they act when they aren't thinking about it. Usually, you are shooting for your character to have some growth or change, and that's what I mean by goal. How do they act when they are being intentional? Then, in any writing situation, you can decide, "are they being natural or are they being intentional?" and decide their actions based on that. I think the most basic conflict you can write about is the tension between who someone is and who they would like to be!

A very basic example of this is that Renji is usually a pretty casual guy. He uses informal speech and probably jokes around with his subordinates. On the other hand, when Byakuya's around, he straightens his spine and puts on his best officer voice, because he wants to impress his boss.

This is going to vary based on the story you want to tell. The "tendency" category is also going to include what your characters do when they are scared or angry or other circumstances where things move from "unthinking" into "involuntary." A nice thing about this is that if you write one million stories about the same characters, you can really show their growth over time.

I hate YouTube analysis videos, but I watched one that really rewired my brain, about how, in a panic situation, Renji freezes up and Rukia runs. Hihiou Zabimaru, as an incomplete bankai, often acts a protective wall around Renji, allowing him to act while standing still. Conversely, So-oh Zabimaru is a close-combat bankai and prominently features a grabby arm. Rukia's bankai, on the other hand, is all about standing her ground (and forcing everyone else to, too). And on one hand, this is a powers analysis, but I use this as a touchstone a lot when I write about their conflict resolution styles at various stages of their maturity.

Here's a bit of advice that may be controversial, but I am going to say it: I think that even if you prefer AUs (and I mean, like, coffee shop AUs, not twist-on-canon AUs) you should write canon-compliant fic once in a while, even just as an exercise. You don't have to show it to anyone, it doesn't need to be a complete story. You can even just take a canon scene and try to write it from the POV of one of your characters. I just people really underestimate the amount of character work it takes to write a good AU. It's super hard to keep the characters feeling correct when you've taken away all the character beats that have informed them as people! In fact, I think it's good for any writer to try out different kinds of writing once in a while, even kinds you think you won't like. It really builds your writerly muscles and forces your to think about things in new and potentially mind-blowing ways.

Anyway, I hope that was helpful! I hope you do give writing a shot and I wish you the best of luck!

#writing advice

11 notes · View notes

serendipitous-magic · 3 years

Note

What is your writing advice for young people who want to write fanfiction and original stories in the near future?

If this is just Way Too Much, skip to the end (#16). My most important piece of advice is there. I also happen to think #5 is pretty good.

-_-_-_-

1) Literally just write. Write whatever you want, and do a lot of it.

_-_

2) You don’t have to post everything. In fact you don’t have to post anything. You can, don’t get me wrong, but it can be intimidating to sit down and think “I will now write something that other people will see and read and judge with their eyeballs.” Because that’s probably gonna lead to nerves and writer's block. Just write down the ideas that you have, the things you want to write, whatever’s in your brain that you want to explore and expand upon and make into something. And then if you want to, share it. Or don’t share it. I have plenty of half-baked ideas and documents and random story chapters and shit hidden away on my Google Drive that will never see the light of day, for a whole number of reasons. I wanted to write it but it wasn’t ~Spicy~ enough to warrant posting, or it’s only like an eighth of a good idea, or it’s like one scene with no story around it, or it’s just something incredibly self-indulgent I just wanted to write for my own enjoyment.

Point being, don’t write for other people. Don’t write so that other people can read it; write what you want, write for yourself, and then if you want to share it, do.

_-_

3) You can pretty much ignore any and all of these for fanfiction. In fact, you can ignore pretty much any rules or guidelines you want for fanfiction. Fanfic is a sandbox. You don’t have to be a ��professional writer” to post fic. No one expects you to be Stephen King or Margaret Atwood. Fanfic is just for playing in a fandom and having fun. If you wanna write a 50 chapter slow burn with very little plot aside from the OTP slowly getting to know each other, and no real stakes or central conflict, I guarantee people would read that. Really, fanfiction is the Old West of writing: lawless, wild, unpredictable, and free.

However, here are the rules you must follow:

-Separate your paragraphs. (I’m sure you know this already, but I’m gonna say it anyway just in case.) Do not post one big block of text. Make a paragraph break when someone new is talking, when the characters are in a new place, when a new event occurs that changes the scene, when a chunk of time has passed, and when there’s a major change in subject.

-I know it’s obvious, but... grammar, punctuation, and capitalization. They exist to make writing easy for readers to read, and more people will read your stuff if they don’t have to stop and try to figure out what you meant.

-Use tags and labels, as is possible with whatever site you’re using. Especially if you include possibly triggering content in your story. Again, I know it’s obvious, but it’s common courtesy. Bonus: tagging the themes and content of your story helps readers find it and read it :)

-If possible, limit the use of all-caps and exclamation marks / question marks. 99% of the time, one ! or one ? will do. If you overload the page with a lot of all-caps and long rows of exclamation marks or question marks, it hampers readability.

... That’s literally all I can think of. And, like I said, it’s all pretty basic stuff. You were probably rolling your eyes like, “Uh, yeah, Gwen, I know.” But that’s literally it. You can pretty much do whatever you want in fanfic.

That being said, here’s my advice for both fanfiction and original work...

_-_

4) A quick and dirty rule for coming up with a plot, starting a story, keeping up pacing, or maintaining tension: figure out what dreams, desires, and goals are nearest and dearest to your main character’s heart (see #16). Then set up the main conflict to be directly in opposition to that goal. It doesn’t have to be in a tangible way, though it could be. But, if your main character wants more than anything to reach the ships on the southern coast of your world and sail to a new life, make sure the main conflict immediately prevents them from doing that - in fact, make sure to send them north. If your main character just wants to keep their loved ones safe, kidnap the loved ones. If your main character just wants to date their best-friend-turned-crush, make sure they think they have no chance - or, make them cocky about it, and make sure it makes Person B determined not to ever like them. You get it. Figure out what your character most wants, and then keep them from having that. Boom - your conflict now ties in with your character's motivation. It's like instant yeast for plots.

_-_

5) If you’re anything like me, you want your first draft to be Good, despite all that advice about how the first draft doesn’t have to be good and it’s just to get words on the page, yadda yadda. And if you’re somewhat of a perfectionist (like myself), it’s easy to get stuck looking at a blank page because you don’t have The Perfect Words, and you want what you write to be Good the first time.

Here’s how I cheat that:

Instead of trying to write a Good First Draft from a blank page, hit the enter key a few times, skip a little down on the page, change your ink to red (or blue, or whatever - just something immediately identifiable as Not Black) and just thought vomit. Write whatever the hell you’re thinking, exactly as you think it. Don’t worry about it being readable, don’t worry about narrative flow for now, don’t worry about covering all the details, don’t worry about anything except either a) getting all the details of your idea out onto the page, whether that’s a lot or whether it’s just a sentence or two, or b) if you don’t have an idea yet, finding your way there.

Because this method is also very good for finding your way to ideas when you’re stuck in writer’s block.

Because of how human brains work, getting this stuff out onto the page - in all its messy, stream-of-consciousness glory - will likely spark more thoughts. As you write your original idea about the scene, it’ll likely spark more ideas. Creation begets creation. If you just start thought-vomiting your ideas onto the page, chances are you’ll think of more things as you go, and you’ll start filling out description or dialogue or tone or action or whatever, and pretty soon the scene starts writing itself.

Not sure where you’re going with the scene or which ideas you wanna use? Use a lot of ambivalent language in your “thought-vomit draft.” My pre-writing notes are chock-full of the words “maybe,” “perhaps,” and the phrases, “At some point...” and “...or something like that.” In this way, I don’t tie myself down to one idea; it’s just an idea, and I’m keeping it on the page in case I use it, but I might chuck it in the trash or change it or whatever.

And then, once your ideas for the scene (or story, or chapter, or whatever) are on the page, then go back to the top and start translating them into a “real” first draft. Use black ink, and start copy-pasting chunks of the thought-vomit up into the top part of the document and translating them into Draft 1. Separate out paragraphs where paragraph breaks should be. Add the correct punctuation and whatnot. Change “describe the lobby here - include potted plants, fancy carpet, blood stain, etc.” into an actual description of the lobby. Flesh it out, or condense, or whatever it needs. And if you’re still stuck, change back to red ink and ramble some more until you find a path that feels right, then plug that in. This keeps you from looking at a blank page, and it allows you to generate a kind of Draft 0.5, somewhere between a plan and a first draft.

You don’t have to use every idea. Like I said, jot down whatever comes to mind, put a “maybe” before or after it, and keep working. If the idea grabs you and you wanna keep expanding on it and exploring it, cool. If you just wanna jot it down so you don’t forget it and then move on, also cool. Red-ink draft / “thought-vomit draft” is your time to jump around in the timeline, add or finesse details at whatever point your brain moves to, etc. Don’t try to do it exactly in story order, because you will get tangential thoughts and ideas, and you will not remember to write them down five pages later when you finally get to taking notes on that scene. Trust me. On that note...

_-_

6) Write everything down the moment you think of it. Seriously.

“I’ll remember it when I get around to writing that scene in a couple days / weeks / months (/years).”

You won’t.

Write it down.

Phone, journal, google docs - hell, my family regularly laughs at me for grabbing a napkin during dinner and scribbling thoughts down alongside pasta sauce stains.

And then, once you have it written down somewhere...

_-_

7) Consolidate your writing ideas in one place.

Maybe this isn’t really your style, and that’s totally chill.

Buuuut, if you’re Type-A like me - or if you tend to be somewhat unorganized and you know you’ll lose track of your writing notes if they’re scattered across multiple notebooks, journals, napkins, phone notes, etc. - having one consolidated document of notes is a life saver. I keep mine on Google Docs so I can access it, add to it, and look through it for inspiration anywhere at any time. When I have one of those Shower Thoughts that I jot down on my phone or on a napkin during dinner, I set myself a reminder on my phone to type it up in my Story Ideas document later.

(Or, if the idea I had was for a story of mine that I’ve already started planning / drafting / whatever, I put it in the document for that story instead of the Big Random Story Ideas doc. You get it.)

_-_

8) Have other ways to collect and save writing ideas, besides just writing stuff down. If you like Pinterest, make pinterest boards of your characters or stories or settings or whatever. If you’re big into playlists, make a playlist for your character / setting / story / etc. Or both. Or something else. I’m not good at drawing, but maybe you are, and maybe you like to draw your ideas. Whatever form it takes, having another way to save ideas and think about your stories is invaluable.

_-_

9) Some writers can just start writing with no idea where the story is going, and they just kind of figure it out as they go. I envy those writers. And I do that sometimes for fanfiction, where the stakes are somewhat lower and the audience is reading more for scene-to-scene enjoyment (and to see their OTP kiss) than for a Driving And Compelling Narrative.

But here’s the thing: especially if you’re just kind of starting out, writing without some sort of plan is really, really hard, and will likely lead you into a slow, meandering narrative that will likely frustrate you.

Even if you think you’re someone that just can’t write with a plan (and again, I have the highest respect for pansters out there - I don’t know how you do it, you crazy bastards, but you keep doing you) - even if you think “I can’t work with plans, they’re too prescriptive, I just want to write and see what happens -”

Try at least making the most skeletal of plans.

Even if you have no clue what 90% of the story is, yet. That’s fine. But you need to have some idea of what you’re building to, even if that’s nothing more specific than a feeling, or a turning point for your character. Even if your entire plan for everything beyond Chapter 1 is, “At some point, Charlie needs to realize that Ed was lying to her.”

This is where those Draft 0.5 notes come in handy. Because, more than likely, working on your current scene that way will spark ideas for later scenes, which you can put down at the bottom of the document and save for when they become relevant. In my experience, the line between planning ahead and making a Draft 0.5 is exceptionally thin. One can quickly turn into the other.

If you’re really, really resistant to the idea of planning ahead, that’s okay. It’s not everybody’s style. But for the love of all that is holy, write down your ideas for future scenes, even if you’re a person that doesn’t like to plan and writes only in story order, because you will not remember that idea once you get to that scene.

_-_

10) You don’t have to write in order.

Here’s the thing: I’m a person that can only do my Draft 1 in story order (meaning, chronological order). I just have to be in that flow; I need to write in story order for me to best channel where the character is at from scene to scene, both narratively and emotionally.

But my Thought Vomit Draft is another thing entirely. By using the brain hack of putting my notes in red (or another color, it doesn’t matter) and going down to the bottom of the document / page and taking notes there, and then integrating them into whatever plan I have, and then translating them into Draft 1 once I get there in the story - by doing that, I can get my good ideas onto the page (and expound upon them and let my muse carry me and ride that momentum while I’m in the moment of inspiration) without writing out of order.

Maybe that’s just me. But if you’re a person who really prefers to write in story order, that could be hugely helpful to you. It is to me.

_-_

11) Emotion and motivation will do more for your story than technicalities of plot.

If your characters really care about something, and their journey through the (shaky or weak) plot is emotionally engaging, it will be a much more compelling story than a story with a “perfect” plot and unrelatable or unmotivated characters.

If your characters care about what they’re doing, and it means something to them, and their goals and actions are driven by dreams or fears or emotions that are integral to who they are, your audience will care too. If you have a perfectly crafted plot that hits all the right beats and has high stakes and fast pacing and drama - but your characters don’t connect with what’s happening in a way that’s deeply meaningful or emotional for them? You’re gonna have a hard time engaging readers.

When in doubt, prioritize character emotion and motivation over plot. Emotion is what drives story.

This power is highly exploitable. (Just look at pulp novels and shitty but entertaining movies.) You can even use it to glaze over plot holes or reinvigorate a limp narrative. Use it that way sparingly, though. It’s a band-aid, not a surgery.

_-_

12) Evil villains are hard to write - mostly because there are very few truly evil people in the world. (There are a few. Billionaires and several big name politicians come to mind.) But by and large, there aren’t that many evil people. There are plenty of bad people, but bad people have some good in them, somewhere in there. Trying to write an evil villain is hard, because they often turn very cartoony.

Here’s a tip: it’s much easier to write antagonists who aren’t evil. Even if they’re bad people. Of course, there’s no reason you can’t write a villain that’s just truly evil - a serial killer, or an abuser, or a billionaire, or someone who legit just wants to hurt people or blow up the earth or stay in control of an oppressed population, or whatever. But chances are, it’s gonna be really hard to make them feel real, and even harder to create a plot around them that doesn’t feel forced or contrived.

Instead, try writing an antagonist / villain whose motivations and goals directly clash with your protagonist’s - but not because they want to take over the world or see people suffer. Write an antagonist who’s chaotic good, but whose perception of the situation is completely opposite from your hero’s. Write an antagonist whose only desire is to save people, and who will do anything to achieve that goal - anything. Write an antagonist who believes in the letter of the law, and will hinder and oppose the hero’s methods even if they agree with the hero’s motivation. Write an antagonist who got in way over their head and did some things they regret, and now they don’t know how to get out, and they’re doing their best but whatever they set in motion is too powerful for them to stop now.

Write villains who are human. Write a killer who thought they were doing the right thing by taking their victim out of the equation, who vomits at the sight of the body and sobs over the grave they dig. Write a government leader who truly believes she’s doing what’s best for her people in the long-term, even if it might hurt them in the short term, and is willing to endure the hatred and belligerence of the masses if it means securing what she thinks is a better future for her people. Write a teenage bully that thinks they’re the one being picked on by the world, and they’re just fighting back, standing their ground. Write a scientist who will break any code of ethics and hurt anyone he needs to - in order to bring back his baby sister from the grave, because he promised her he’d protect her and he failed. Write an antagonist who is selfish and self-centered and capricious - because in order to survive they had to look out for Number One, and that habit ain’t about to break anytime soon.

Write villains who aren’t even villains. Write antagonists who oppose the hero because of moral differences. Write antagonists who are trying to do the right thing. Write antagonists who treat the heroes with kindness and dignity and respect and gentleness.

They don’t have to be good. They don’t have to be Misunderstood Sweethearts who “deserve” a redemption arc. They can be cruel and nasty and dismissive and callous and violent and etc. etc.

Just hesitate before you make them Evil-with-a-capital-E. Because evil is hard to write, and honestly, boring to read. Flawed human beings with goals and motivations that directly oppose the main characters’ are much easier to write and much more interesting to read.

Ask why. Why is your villain trying to take over the world? What does that even mean? Are they trying to create a Star-Trek-like post-capitalism utopia, but they know that won’t happen in a million lifetimes, so they’re trying to do it by force? Are they actually super in favor of human rights, but they got very impatient waiting for the world to do anything about poverty and war, so they decided to take it into their own hands? Are they determined to fix the world - no matter the cost? Are they terrified and overwhelmed, but committed to see it through to the end? Or - maybe they’re just doing it on a dare. Maybe they don’t really give a shit about world domination, they were just a mediocre rich white guy who decided to fuck around and find out, and now he’s kind of curious how far he can take this thing. And now he’s kind of an internationally-wanted criminal, so he’s kind of stuck living on his hidden private island in his multi-billion dollar secret base, strapping lasers to sharks’ heads for the hell of it. Gross, selfish, uncaring, and dangerous? For sure. Evil? Depends on your definition. See, now we’re getting somewhere.

_-_

13) It’s tempting to let the plot control the characters. It’s easy to drop your characters into a situation and see how they react. But here’s the thing: that doesn’t drive plot. In fact, it bogs down pacing. Instead, try to build you plot off of your characters’ actions and decisions. Let your character build their own situation. Not to say it should go they way they wanted it to go; in fact, usually, their grand plans should go to hell very quickly. But having the characters take action and make decisions, and letting the plot develop based on that, is much easier to make compelling than making a rigid series of events and then trying to herd your characters into them.

_-_

14) Having trouble justifying a character’s actions? Consider having them make the opposite decision, or having them approach the situation in a different way. For example: you need your character to go meet the bad guy, for plot reasons, even though there’s no way it’s not a trap. If the character goes, readers are gonna be groaning with their head in their hands, because c’mon man, that was really fucking stupid. But he’s gotta go, because the plot needs that. Two ways you might handle this: a) He knows it’s probably a trap. He decides not to go. The plot conspires to get him near the villain anyway. Or, b) He knows it’s a trap. But he needs to go, for (insert reasons here). So, he approaches it in an unexpected way. He brings backup, recruiting a side character we met earlier in the story. Or he arrives on the back of a dragon, because ain’t nobody gonna fuck with a dude on a dragon. Or he goes - early, and ambushes the villain. It may work, it may not. He may get himself kidnapped anyway. But it moves the plot along without having Stupid Hero Syndrome.

_-_

15) This is a legit piece of advice: if all of this sounds overwhelming, literally just ignore it and write what you want. For real. Writing should be fun, and every single writer operates differently. If you’re sitting here like “I’m getting stressed just reading this,” just flip me a good-natured bird and get on with your life. I promise I won’t take it personally. Same goes for literally any other writing advice you see. Lots of rules and guidelines can very quickly make anything thoroughly un-fun. Just write. If you’re passionate about it and you do it for long enough, you’ll start figuring out the tips and tricks on your own.

_-_

16) Here’s the best piece of advice I can give you: know your characters. More importantly, know what’s important to them. Build their personality and decisions off of that, and build your plot off of their decisions.

I see a lot of character building sheets that ask a shit-ton of questions like “What’s their most prized possession?” “Do they like their family?” “What’s their favorite food?”

And while these are good questions, my problem with this type of character building is that if you start there, with the little stuff, you’re building on nothing. IMO, to make a truly strong character (not strong like Inner Strength, strong like effective), you need a strong foundation.

Here are the things you must know about your character:

a) What are their greatest fears / deepest insecurities? And I don’t mean “wasps” or “heights.” I mean the deep shit. I mean fears like “living a meaningless life,” or “turning out just like their parents,” or “that no one will ever love them,” or “being powerless.” You may say, “But they’re really scared of wasps! They fall into a wasp nest when they were little and got stung so much they almost died!” Great! That’s a fantastic bit of backstory. They should absolutely be afraid of wasps, and that should absolutely be an impediment later in the story. But dig deeper. What about that event actually scarred them? Was it the helplessness? Stumbling around, swatting at the air, not being able to do a single thing to stop what was happening to them? Was it that they were alone, and no matter how loud they screamed, no one was coming? Was it the bodily horror of feeling themself turn into an inhuman creature as they swelled up from the stings, unable to move their fingers or face normally anymore?

And don’t forget insecurities, because those factor in, too. Are they deeply insecure about their identity? Do they believe, deep down, that they’re ugly? Did they grow up poor and they’ve always been really touchy about that? Why? Dig deep. Figure out what really, really bothers them.

b) What are their hopes and dreams? What do they truly want out of life? What do they consider the most valuable to their experience here in this thing called life? Is it the freedom to forge their own path and be independent? Is it the approval of their family or peers? Is it a home? Is it knowledge, or understanding? Spiritual fulfillment? Is it deeply important to them that they contribute to their community, or protect those they love? What do they need in order to feel truly and deeply fulfilled in life?

Figure out those two things (each one encompasses several things, btw, you don’t have to stop at just one for each), and then use that to inform how they behave and the types of decisions they make within the story.

It also informs character behavior and personality.

Let’s say we have a character who’s afraid of helplessness. They’re probably gonna be the person that always wants to do something, try something, no matter how hopeless the situation seems. They’d despise just sitting and waiting, probably, because it makes them feel powerless. They might even be the person that makes rash decisions and acts impulsively and puts themself in danger unnecessarily, because in their mind it’s better than being at the mercy of fate. This is one way you could use a character’s personality to inform their decisions, which in turn helps to inform plot.

Or, let’s say we have a character whose greatest fear is being left behind or forgotten. We may have a chatterbox on our hands. They might be obnoxious. They might love the spotlight, constantly vying for attention no matter the situation, because deep down they’re so afraid that they’d be forgotten otherwise. Or, it may go the opposite way. They may be so afraid of people leaving them that they’re terrified of bothering people. They don’t want to do anything that could annoy people, anything that might give people a reason to leave them. They might be exceedingly polite, quiet, accommodating. A push-over, really.

These are two nearly opposite types of personalities, both stemming from the same core fear/insecurity. You can go a lot of different ways with it. But if you build on that strong foundation, you’ll have a strong character, and a stronger plot.

Likewise, the structure of your story can and should inform the design of these character traits. If you need your characters to team up near the end, it may be impactful if you give your main character a deep fear of commitment, an insecurity about being unwanted or left behind, and make them highly value independence and freedom. That could make their team-up for the final battle very meaningful. Conversely, you can use your character’s deepest fears and desires to help design the plot. Is your character deeply insecure about voicing their opinions or taking a stand, because of trauma they faced in the past? Make them face that. Build that into the climactic third act. Give them the big inspirational speech where they stand up and talk about what they believe to be important, what they think the group should do. And then design that character arc to run through the story, giving you more handholds and stepping stones, more pieces of foundation on which to design the plot.

In this way, character should inform story as much as story informs character. It’s a feedback loop.

Bonus: if you build your character and your plot off of each other in this way, it automatically starts to build in the foundations of that emotional investment I mentioned earlier. If your character’s decisions are based on what they most want and do not want in life, you basically have your character motivation and stakes pre-built.

Note: you need to know these things about your villain, too.

-_-_-

I’m genuinely sorry about the length of this, lmao. But you did ask.

Best of luck!

Edit: I forgot an important one:

17) Start when the scene starts and end when the scene ends.

What do I mean by that?

If your notes say “Danny asks Nicole out after school and majorly flubs it,” start the scene when Danny approaches Nicole after school. Better yet, cold-open the scene on “I was wondering if, you know, you’d wanna. You know. Hang out some time?”

Don’t start that morning when Danny goes to school, unless you’re gonna cover the school day in like one or two sentences. Don’t spend whole paragraphs going through the school day, unless it’s to cover other plot points first (in which case apply these same guidelines there), or if the paragraphs are there for a specific reason, like to illustrate how stressed he is and how it seems like every little thing is going wrong. Even then, trim the fat as much as possible. Expounding and describing everything Moment-to-moment is for the meat of the scenes, not the leading-up-to and coming-away-from.

Here’s my rule of thumb: study how and when movies cut from scene to scene. Movies have exceptionally strict, limited time for storytelling; they’re excellent examples of starting a scene when the plot point starts and ending when it’s over. If you can’t picture a movie showing everything you showed, start the scene later and end it earlier.

#asks #anon #writing advice #writing tips #writing #fanfic writing #fanfiction #character creation #plot development #character development #my advice #original writing

729 notes · View notes

otakusheep15 · 2 years

Note

Hi! I just recently found your account but I just love your writing! I was wondering if you felt like it doing a hurt/comfort HC reaction where a gn/mc had past trauma and one day like Lucifer and one of the brothers (probably Satan or Mammon) have a screaming match and it makes the MC just kinda panic? I hope this ask doesn't make you uncomfortable, and if you could add some of the side characters like Simeon or Barbs maybe? 💖🌺

I've been waiting for someone to request this for so long so that I finally had an excuse to write about it! These kinds of scenarios are my fave. Also, I’m not gonna include the side characters in this post, but if you want, I can do them in a separate post later.

Only big brothers in this post; little brothers will be separate.

MC’s Past Trauma (pt 1)

I’m not gonna get too into the details of the fight cause that would take up too much time

But the basics are that Lucifer and Satan were fighting in the main hall (again) and everyone else was around to hear it

No one really knows how it started or what they’re even arguing about, but it got bad really quick

What started as a light debate very quickly turned into a shouting match, especially on Satan’s part

Everyone else was standing by, waiting for it to blow over, but it didn’t seem to end

The first one who notice that anything might be wrong with you was Mammon

He tried to let the two know so that they would shut up, but neither bothered listening

If anything, Mammon getting in the way just made them even more mad, and suddenly it became an even bigger fight

The only reason the fighting stopped was when they heard you run out the room, presumably to your own

Lucifer

It takes him a second to calm down before going to see you

The last thing he wants is to make matters worse by going to you still angry

When he feels that he’s calm enough, he goes to your room to check up on you

Knocks on your door gently so as not to startle you, and walks in after a moment

Finds you curled up on your bed, sobbing, and the sight leaves him heartbroken further

He caused you to break down like this, and he can feel every last bit of his pride leave him

Instead of disturbing you, he takes a seat at your desk and waits for you to calm down

When you finally do, he attempts to speak to you, his voice softer than you’ve ever heard it

His first words are rambled apologies, all of which seems very out of character for him

After he finishes apologizing, he asks how you’re feeling and if you wanna talk at all

You decide to talk about it, trusting that he would never judge you

Slowly, you open up about your past trauma, explaining the reason as to why you were so shaken up by the yelling

As you explain, he sits there in silence, taking in your words

It all just makes him feel worse knowing that he brought those memories back to you

He can feel himself getting angry again, both at himself and those who caused you pain before

But he’s able to contain his emotions throughout the rest of your story

You wrap it up, and he stays silent, contemplating his next move

He wants nothing more than to wrap you in a tight embrace right now, but he doesn’t want to startle you

So he asks, to which you tentatively agree, still a little out of it from earlier

his hug is hesitant, his arms barely around you out of fear of hurting you, but it’s comforting all the same

Mammon

Just as you’d expect, he’s tailing right behind you

You don’t even get a chance to close your door before he’s bursting into the room, apologizing profusely

Of course, his loud voice just causes you to get even more upset, which just makes him get louder

After a couple seconds, he does manage to realize that he’s the one making you react like this, and he shuts up immediately

He kinda just flees to the far side of your room to give you space to cool down

Feels really bad for how he handled the situation and how he just made you feel worse

If it wasn’t for him, his brothers might have cooled off before the situation got worse

But then he had to go and throw fuel onto the fire, and now look at what he’s done

Spends a bit wallowing in self pity as you calm yourself down a bit, and he looks for a better way to make it up to you

Refuses to come anywhere near you until you give him the go-ahead, and even then he’ll be super conscious about his next move

But he will eventually come over to you and sit next to you on your bed, still trying to stay quiet

You can tell that he wants to talk, so you tell him it’s okay, but just to be quieter than last time

And, once again, he’s spilling apology after apology, completely throwing any shame or tsundere-ness out of the window

It’s obvious that he is genuinely sorry about what happened, even if he doesn’t really understand your reactions

After thinking on it, you decide to tell him about your past, and explain why you’re so sensitive to arguing

He completely understands, and actually feels the same way as you

Doesn’t make a big deal out of it since you didn’t make a big deal out of it,

Instead, he decides to distract both you and him for the rest of the night

He’s rushing off to his room and finding as many movies as he possibly can in all that chaos, and then he’s coming right back

For the rest of the night, the two of you sit on your bed watching movies, with him occasionally inching closer until you’re cuddled up close

Eventually, you both fall asleep to the sound of some random action movie, content to leave things as they are for now

Leviathan

Unsurprisingly, he wasn’t even in the room when the whole argument began

Instead, he was up in his room with his headphones on, trying (and failing) to block out his brothers

He only takes them off and starts listening in when he hears a sudden lull in the arguing

It’s quite rare for an argument between Lucifer and Satan to just stop so abruptly, so he’s quite confused

Then he hears the sounds of your muffled sobs as you flee into your room

Why you were crying, he had no idea, but even he could take a guess

Not wanting to pressure you too much, he shoots you a quick text asking if you wanna come over and watch some anime with him

You usually do the same whenever he’s in a bad mood, so he wants to do the same for you

To his complete surprise, you show up to his room, eyes red and faint sniffles being the first things he notices

He wants to comfort you so bad, just wrap you up in a hug and tell you that everything’s gonna be okay, but he can’t right now

That level of intimacy, even in a situation like this, would be way too much for him to handle

So instead, he invites you in and offers to let you pick out an anime, anyone you want

You pick out your favorite comfort anime, and he grabs a laptop (probably one of many) to play it on

The two of you sit in front of his bathtub, resting up against it and using his pillows as cushions

He keeps a healthy distance at first to make sure he doesn’t overwhelm you, but he quickly finds himself gravitating towards you anyways

However, you don’t seem to mind that much, and it’s even you who ends up closing the distance, pressing you right up against his side

The warmth is a comfort to you both, and you find yourself finally begin to calm down from your previous attack

After the fourth or so episode ends, he finally works up the courage to ask you what happened, assuring you that there was no pressure to answer

After a moment, you answer, telling him about the fighting, as well as your past trauma that made you react the way you did

He sits in stunned silence, not at all expecting this from you

It takes a moment for him to talk, and it takes some prompting on your part

When he does, it comes out soft, as if afraid he might ruin the moment if he speaks any louder

What he says is a thank you, a thank you for being so open with him, and trusting him with this vital part of you

No one in his life has ever trusted him this much to open up like that, and he’s grateful that you are now that person

In a moment of bravery and emotion, he pulls you into a tight hug, to which you gladly reciprocate

Although, the moment ends just as quickly when he realizes what he’s doing, and he retracts from you out of embarrassment

It’s an adorable sight, and it makes you smile to see his red face

And while he certainly is flustered, he’s also happy that he could make you smile like that even after the events of earlier

These scenarios are one of my faves and I really hope I delivered. Be on the lookout for a part 2 once I get the other asks out of my inbox!

#obey me #shall we date obey me #hurt/comfort #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me mephistopheles #obey me gn mc

145 notes · View notes

autumnleaves1991-blog · 3 years

Note

*sips my ice cold Pepsi* nope, still thirsty. I wanna top all the Triple Frontier boys, separately, so I can give them all the care, love and orgasms they deserve. Benny seems like the type to be a brat but once you get him in the bedroom, on his knees, all he wants to be is a good boy, the best, just for you. Uses toys on you, takes every direction so well just watching you, reveling in the way you tug his hair or physically put him in the position you want. Ruin this boys orgasms, edge him all while telling him how you're going to ride him. He calls you ma'am, I don't make the rules.

Santi has a smart mouth, sit on it. He teases all day, over text, email, post-it notes, fucking smoke signals if he could he would. Nicknames for daaaays. Calls you ma'am sarcastically, when he wants to push your buttons. Don't let it show, keep a cool and calm demeanor until you get him home where you can wreck his shit. Leave hickies and bite marks and holy crap if this man doesn't like it rough then I'm a saint. Bondage? Light but yes. Pegging? Don't let him cum until he apologizes for being such a little shit. Competency kink, yes gawd.

Will roleplays. Fight me. Not often, but it's a thing to behold. He has a thing for numbers and details and he makes that work for him so it can be amazing for you. Switch. Fight this boy for dominance, let him know you aren't gonna break and then pin him down on the kitchen floor to prove it to him. Most likely to break/knock stuff over while fucking. Sparing leads to fucking 100% of the time.

Frankie, another sweet boy. Who I can actually see being a bit of a brat on occasion because he likes when you put him in his place. Gently and firmly. It gives him goosebumps and a hard-on. Use him, he wants to make you feel good and whatever affection you give him between tugs on his hair and the scratches on his back just sends him higher. Sensory deprivation/play? Yup. Ultimate trust, he knows you have him and you'll take care of him. That's all he wants (and to watch you cum).

😔✌️sorry not sorry actually if this is too much I do apologize

This was was fucking gorgeous! Like good lord.

Fight this boy for dominance, let him know you aren't gonna break and then pin him down on the kitchen floor to prove it to him. Most likely to break/knock stuff over while fucking. Sparing leads to fucking 100% of the time.

I seriously cannot stop thinking about this with WIll. Like GOD DAMN. I can just see him fighting for control but you know he loves it when you take charge but he's not gonna make it easy for you.

#this was glorious #give us more #I need it babe

67 notes · View notes

metalheadcowboy · 3 years

Note

I want all your Olympic Harringrove thoughts please ESPECIALLY them testing the limits of the sexproof beds! 💋👌 BIG BRAIN idea right there! (Only if you wanna share ofc!)

(and ooh with skateboarding in the Olympics I am getting ideas about scruffy skaterboy Billy and fancy dressage boy Steve...)

🍒

AHHHH OKAY OKAY OKAYA HEHHEHHEE

First I have a lot of just random hcs about accommodations and stuff,,,

- While eating Steve always sits across from Billy and puts his hand up to the plexiglass separating them due to COVID and pretends like they’re in a rom com movie where Billy’s leaving him. He’ll put on a fake frown, think up some dialogue and everything all while Billy rolls his eyes, trying desperately to hide the amused smirk at he chews on his food.

- There’s no partying in the Olympic Village and alcohol has to be contained to athletes rooms, so the night after they bring home the gold they stay up late in their room having their own little two person party with whatever random alcohol they could think to put in their bags before leaving, and what didn’t get confiscated at the airport. (this also happens to be the night they break the bed but I’ll get to that later.)

- Their coach has gotten on to them many times for sliding down their masks for a millisecond to steal a quick kiss so they start making a point to kiss through their masks. One time even pretending to make out through the masks, laughing uncontrollably when they’re pulled away from each other in a fit of confusion and disgust. Sure their masks are now soaked in their own spit but it was kinda worth it.

- They have to get tested daily for COVID and every time they take Billy’s saliva he jokes and says that the governments gonna clone him and make the perfect Olympic team. Then it’s Steve’s turn to roll his eyes.

- As they’re leaving the Tokyo games there are people distributing condoms, which Steve finds hilarious ironic hence the sex-proof beds. And yet they go home and use every single one of them just for the hell of it. Billy posts a picture of the open condom on his Twitter and says “Take that Tokyo“

- Surprisingly Billy and Steve don’t have sex until their medal is won, or penetrative sex I should say. They’ve done just about everything else though 😂

-Steve can’t count the amount of times he’s woken up to Billy grinding against his ass sometimes awake sometimes asleep and he’s just let it be, or even ground back because the guy works damn hard and honestly deserves it.

- When they win Billy and Steve bite different sides of the same gold medal, the press gets a real kick out of that

- During training and practice they get into more tussles than they care to admit. Billy getting frustrated with Steve because his entry on the dives are late. Steve getting pissed off because Billy doesn’t care as much about technique or the finer details. But they never go to sleep mad, sleep in different beds, sure, but Steve always breaks the tension by kneeling next to Billy’s bed as he’s trying to go to sleep, giving him a soft kiss on the forehead and telling him that he loves him.

-Billy also gets pissed with himself a lot when he messes up and has many self destructive tendencies he reverts to when he gets frustrated with himself, so Steve sometimes has to just sit him down and talk him up or work him through some breathing exercises to calm him down.

I was hcing synchronize diver Harringrove but SKATEBOARDING HARRINGROVE???? HOW DID I MISS THAT YOU’RE A GENIUS!!!

Billy with loads of tattoos in streetwear, messy curls a little longer pulled into a bun midway up the back of his head in some beat up sneakers 😭😭

And Steve fucking dressed to impress, like not dressy but wearing expensive brands to the point where Billy thinks he’s a spoiled brat meanwhile Steve is making total heart eyes at this scruffy skater pulling out moves he could only dream of doing ❤️

ALSO SHIT I KNOW YOU WANTED TO HEAR ABOUT THE BED BUT I HABE ANOTHER ASK SO BED FIC TO COME I PROMISE AKSNDNNDJJF

#Uh I typed this at the speed of light so sorry about mistakes I just got a bit excited 😭#Steve Harrington #Billy Hargrove #Harringrove #Stranger Things #Olympics AU #This barely even included any sports IM SORRY ILL MAKE MORE LATER I PROMISE

71 notes · View notes

amorisland · 2 years

Text

My more detailed thoughts on the Leak/spoilers as I read them:

[don’t read if you don’t wanna know I just want to vent somewhere while reading through them]

(I decided to post this after all for those who couldn’t read the scripts before they were privated and maybe want to know more)

the line in episode 34 where MC’s partner says they don’t understand how people expect men and women to smell like different things is such a Will thing I just love him sm

Wowsers they’re shoving Kelly down our throats, I think they really are trying to push her as the next Chelsea or something she’s EVERYWHERE in chapter 34 its kinda annoying. Like she seems lovely but FB really set her up stalking mc

ALSO WILL + MC HIDEAWAY SCENE????? HSJLKSJDFKS YES PLEASE

Will CAN pick MC at the recoupling sobbing crying throwing up but his speech should be better, he poured his heart out for thabi then we get “i don’t know what i’m doing or where i’m going but i like the ride” 🙄

AWWW Will was nervous about picking MC even though it was a guys day (also its an exclusive text for him, the others are nervous too but written differently)

OH MY GOD if you aren’t with Will he picks Tiffany? Plot twist and here we all were thinking it was Kelly (but Will has a prom outfit and Tiff and Kelly don’t interesting)

Oh god yeah Tom isn’t for me, you’ve known each other like 3 days and you pop an I love you during a recoupling speech? gives me the ick

Kelly gets eliminated??? Over Angie (no offense I ADORE Angie but she’s been single for 3 recouplings??) People are gonna be PISSED

WILL (?) TALKING ABOUT UNCLOGGING THE SINK AGAIN AND ASKING IF IT WAS ROMANTIC FOR MC JKLDSJKFDLS BYE

The omelette/scramble talk sounds like Will too, (Pretty sure it is Will exclusive seeing MC call him Will directly) talking about the slow burn and how lots of people don’t like waiting around 😭 I’m falling in love

“Will finds James comforting. He thinks of him as a dad.” 💀

The game remembers that Will is ticklish I love that

HAHA Will being worried about another boy with tats

Youcef’s “Maybe I made a mistake” talking about Dylan I’m dying

Oliver is turning my head a little, might need to run a second game for him buuut I still feel weird that Will is the only dom guy (and even then I get the feeling Will is a switch) every guy this season is subby which isn’t totally bad I love myself a good switch

OLIVER HAS A PET CAT NAMED DANDELION I LOVE HIM

LOL poor Anj she finally see’s a guy she's interested in and MC gets voted to go on the dates instead of her, also yet again we go on another date where we can’t pick our date sigh LET ME GO ON A DATE WITH MY CHOSEN PARTNER

Will better not get up to something while I’m on a date AGAIN or I’m gonna slap someone probably him

Not Dylan saying artist have unsteady jobs, which is so funny bc I headcanon my mc as being a successful artist who finally got her big break and is selling her art for a lot of money like babe she probably makes more money than you

Dylan is literally just Jakub 2.0

Dylan “back at home they call me vanilla ice cream” MC “Because it's bland and full of low expectations?” 💀 💀 💀 💀

Oliver Oliver Oliver I love him he’s turning my head so much its spinning also towel daddy is no daddy he’s subby and that’s okay

SITTING ON WILL’S LAP SITTING ON WILL’S LAP SITTING ON WILL’S-

People seriously thought Will would cheat on us when its Dylan being a dickhead and saying WE cheated my heart’s going to break

AND THEY FIND OUT ABOUT YOU KISSING HAZEEM HAHAHAHA but I wasn’t with Will when it happened so he can’t be mad at me for it? He had just pied me off for Thabi and my mc was so confused 🥺

During the Dylan argument Will seems to have his own separate dialogue in which he opens up a bit more and I like that there’s multiple outcomes like? Will can dump you or you can work things out from what I can tell which is nice its giving me ON vibes except in this we’re Noah??? and someone is trying to test our relationship??? lol

“I had a miserable night without you too. As lonely as the moon hanging in the empty sky above a mountaintop” WILL HAND IN MARRIAGE RIGHT NOW

“No one does this kind of crap to my girl. No one.” this is probably Bruno or all the LIs/Besties but this line right here. I love.

“We belong together now, you won’t get rid of me that easily!” 😭

MC gets to pick first at the final recoupling! Hee haw

Endgame options (as far as I can tell) are Angie, Bruno, James, Najuma, Youcef, Oliver, Tom, and Will?

Okay I skipped ahead to chapter 47 and Will YOU KINKY BASTARD I LOVE YOU he’s done it in airplanes, saunas, you name it

okay back to chapter 42 the way I screamed at the “you and Will are enjoying a lazy afternoon in the sun” AS I SHOULD’VE BEEN ALL DAMN SEASON

“It might have taken us a long time to find each other, but I'm glad we did." " feel like a fool for not coupling up with you sooner.” WILL 💍💍💍💍

Okay that dialogue is repeated with like everyone 😔

And that’s all that I live wrote as I was reading because I was getting tired and skimmed through the last few chapters, I didn’t even get to read chapter 48 😭💔 I hope it gets reposted somewhere

#I wasn't going to post this bc its long and rambley #but the scripts got privated so i thought some people might wanna know some details #if anyone has any questions in particular i'll try to answer them the best i can!#i did skim the last few chapters and didn't read 48 so idk everything though

11 notes · View notes

kuroos-moon · 3 years

Text

≫ Incomplete

pairing: miya atsumu x reader

tags: lovers to exes, fluff to angst

warning/s: cheating, angst

wc: 1.8k

part two: complete

You were always a pair, Atsumu and you; not in the way he and Osamu are, but in the sense wherein the weather didn’t decide for him whether his day would be gloomy or not, for the vibrance of his day solely depended on you.

The sun could shine into every dark nook around him, and yet brightness is only blinding to him if you’re nowhere to be seen in the light. On the other hand, even if heavy rain decided to soak his shoes and clothes, the sky a single color which is a boring gray, the world through his eyes—is nothing but warm, glowing, and euphoric.

And as he stares back at your lit-up eyes through the thick shower of rain, hearing your hearty laughter above the weather’s unforgiving noise, he realized that you are his world after all.

Years later and you’re rooted even deeper from wherever he stood, in fact, you had easily become his home. It mattered none that you still don’t live together, it mattered even less that your relationship was kept secret all for the sake of your privacy. What truly mattered to you both, was the unbreakable trust you had in each other, the very trust that made your love grow and last this long.

“I’ll miss ‘ya, don’t forget to eat on time, okay?” Though hooded, strands of his disarray blonde hair still stuck out cutely, and you busy yourself by pushing back his hair as if it were important right now.

“Y/n,” he sighs, taking both your small, shaky hands in his warm, big ones. This is hard for him too.

He scans your face, having memorized how your brows would furrow above your teary eyes, how your lips would quiver and your hands would shake before you cried—he knew that this parting would involve much of your tears yet again.

“I’m fine, I- I’m not gonna cr-

You couldn’t even finish your sentence, sobs already erupting from your throat as he pulls you into his chest, an arm tight around your waist while his other hand rests behind your head, securing you to himself.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he softly mumbles, head dipped down beside your ear as he rocks you gently along with him, he always hated having to leave you after such little time spent together.

The bus ride to the hotel four towns away from where you lived was excruciating. You weren’t overdramatic when you cried earlier, he never thought that of you; it’s just that your time for each other had greatly been narrowed down to phone calls and irritatingly short meet ups, he understood why you were so sad.

And whose fault is that? His subconscious asks almost instantly.

Come to think of it, it’s always you who had to alter your life around his. Of course, he didn’t just think of it now, but only right then did it hit him that your relationship had gone too imbalanced for he doesn’t know how long—it made him sick to think that he could ever do that to you.

You were both givers in your relationship, but lately all he’d done was take.

Resting his chin on his palm as he stares out the window, flashbacks of your years together played beautifully in his mind, his eyes closed and a small smile on his lips. Today was a Wednesday.

He’ll be home by Friday if he’d be lucky enough to ditch their manager and the celebratory party he couldn’t really care less for, not compared to you. If not, he’ll see you Saturday morning.

Either way, he knows he has to purchase the ring on Thursday night.

He goes over his plan, excitement rushing through him as he visualizes how happy he’ll make you; and he’ll give all of himself to make up for the tears he caused you when he was too busy to make you feel like you weren’t alone.

For starters, announcing your engagement on Sunday morning after proposing on a Saturday date night, and just to flaunt, he’ll post his favorite picture of you both in his socials. Well that’s assuming you don’t refuse, it’s highly unlikely anyway.

Next, he’ll offer you his undivided attention. No more passing out in bed right after practice and missing the chance to see you, no more relying on the fact that you’ll wake up whatever time he calls or comes over, insensitively disrupting your sleep or plans for the day.

Lastly... moving in has been long overdue. With your engagement out to public, there’s no reason to have separate houses anymore. Just the thought of cradling you whenever he wants to, no longer needing to travel and be cautious, has him almost bouncing on his seat.

He’ll be the best husband, and he knows you’ll be an awesome wife—did I say wife? He’s getting too far ahead of himself. His teammates only look at him weirdly as he covers his face with both hands, an inexplicable muffled scream of fluster leaving his lips.

Plans were beautiful, especially when he meant to fulfill them with all of his heart and with all of his being. Small things lead to big changes though, for better or worse, he just wishes he went home right away that night.

You awoke at dawn on a Saturday to a car pulling up outside your house. Still clueless of the world as you’re fresh from sleep, mindlessly looking through your window, immediately brought to your senses when you see their manager’s car.

Racing down the stairs and past the door, you could almost scream in happiness when you see him get off the car. But something’s weird, he looked out of it from where you stood on your doorstep, and he had an arm around Hinata’s shoulders as the latter supported your boyfriend who couldn’t even walk straight.

“Hey, what happened?” You’re quick to wrap an arm around him as you took Hinata’s place in guiding him to your home.

“Shoyo?” He too, seemed out of it. He looks at you with sad eyes, almost as if he came bearing bad news when in fact you’re so grateful he brought Atsumu to you.

“Something happened, y/n.”

That was all the orange left you with but it didn’t really matter much to you, you’re far too preoccupied with taking care of Atsumu.

“Why did you even drink a lot,” you scoldingly say under your breath, hands cupping both his cheeks so he would finally look at you. “What’s wrong, ‘Tsum?”

“Don’t touch me,” he snaps, swatting your hands away before he stands up and walks past you, shakingly running his hands through his blonde locks in frustration.

“What is it?” You ask, hurt by his rejection and his tone. He wasn’t always the nicest person, but to you, he’d never as much as raise his voice or snap at you like that ever since he matured after highschool.

“I’m sorry,” he turns around, and you only look at him in confusion.

“I- I kissed someone else,” he softly says without warning, as if it were something casual and painless.

“What?”

You never thought that he would be capable of doing that to you, in fact, you understood that he was kissed without him wanting to be kissed—the problem is that he kissed back. He could’ve easily hidden it from you, yet you both knew he couldn’t live with it.

On his knees before you as you sat on the bed, he cries on your lap as you lightly run your fingers through his hair. The world for you both came crashing down, he could already feel you slip through his fingers at every apology he sobbed out, his chest aching so much as he forces himself to wake up from this nightmare.

He never woke up though, because it bitterly wasn’t a dream. Glancing up to look at you through his tears, he knew he had shattered you beyond repair—a single night was all it took—when all of more than five years together, he had spent nurturing you with so much care and affection.

What agonized him the most was the void look in your eyes, he had destroyed what you both had, and deep down he knew that it will take eons if not forever for you to love someone else. If only he could take away your hurt, if only he hadn’t done what he did, if only he went straight home to you.

“What now, ‘Tsum?” You ask him, lost and almost dead inside, but you still had the heart to hold him against you because truth is, this would be your last night together.

“Be happy and go on with your life,” he lowly says. Contrary to how his words held meaning of parting, he hugs you even tighter to himself.

“Without you?”

He almost chokes at the lump on his throat, but he had managed to be firm with his resolve—it’s the least he could do for you.

“Yes. Without me,” he says the words he never wanted to say, kissing your temple when you cry once more into his chest.

You were always a pair, Atsumu and you; not in the way he and Osamu are, but in the sense wherein one could never be without the other.

So what becomes of a torn-apart pair?

What you had was something you both would call shatterproof to an extend beyond bounds, but what you didn’t know was that when shatterproof things do what they aren’t ever expected to do—when they do break, tear, and shatter—everything else crumbles as severely as how strong the ‘unbreakable’ was supposed to be.

You’re just two souls who had become one, now separated and agonizingly partial and incomplete.

You still read two zodiac signs and leave space for him in bed, taking into account years of him suddenly sneaking in your room to sleep beside you and getting up before you even woke. You’re stuck in a cycle of always thinking for two and not only yourself, in every decision you make or thoughts you thought over, at the back of your mind, you’d wonder what he would think about it or what he’d tell you if he were still with you.

And as he stares back at your lit-up eyes through the thick shower of rain, hearing your hearty laughter above the weather’s unforgiving noise, he realized that you are his world after all.

To Atsumu since your parting, his rainy days were just that—rainy. Even in nice weather he could only lock himself alone in his room, praying that you were enjoying the sun unlike him; for every little detail of his life revolted back to the thought of you, like how he’d stare longer at his hand, almost imagining a translucent image of your fingers slipping through the gaps of his.

The ring he had bought? He kept it hidden in his shelf, and for as long as he’s alive he’ll keep it as a painful but much deserved reminder of a life with you that could’ve been.

General Taglist [Open]: @noyasbitchh @dinablossom @haru-the-secret @strayczennies @lalisbitch @tinymidgetsstuff @animebs @astrealia @kittykitkatstrawberry @hajimesbbygrl @kellesvt @24hr7dysdizzy @arnxldss @elianetsantana @vicassa @floraraine @beanst0ck @leinnah @kageyamasgirl @deafeningart @minibobabottle @franko-pop @moonlightaangel @throughtheinterstices @micasaessakusa @dixonsbugaboo @thevillagehiddenintheinternet @ultzuko @yappychan @dipsydoo542 @devilgirlcrybabiey @bakugohoex

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu!! scenarios #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu oneshots #haikyuu!! oneshots #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu!! headcanons #atsumu miya #haikyuu angst #haikyuu!! x you #haikyuu x you #atsumu miya x reader

235 notes · View notes

loquaciousquark · 4 years

Text

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E113 (Oct. 27, 2020)

Good evening and good night, lovely people of the world! We’re on the internet and ready to go. Tonight’s guests are Travis Willingham and Sam Riegel. This will be calm, controlled, and sane, I can feel it. Brian points out it’s been seven months since either of them were on Talks. Oof. (Sam asks if it’s been going the whole time without him. Bigger oof.) Travis keeps sneaking bites out of an acai bowl or something and tries to look sneaky about it, and I laugh every time because he’s just...so big. He’s such a big person.

(Brian is wearing a lobstrosity shirt. He and Travis talk about Dark Tower for a bit; then Sam tries to get into the conversation: “Is that the thing from It?” Brian: “Is what the thing from It?” Sam: “Is that lobster the clown from It? I’m not very literate. Is that a Langolier? Is that a Shawshank?”)

Announcements: none! Maybe they just forgot. We’ve been talking about Sam’s spooky skeleton decorations for like five minutes. Brian suggests taking them to Travis’s house. Travis: “That’s the fastest way to get to the smell of burning plastic.” Brian: “Speaking of your girlfriend...”

On Avantika: Fjord wouldn’t call it a relationship as much as a casual sexual interaction. Not official! Super not official!!

The first sea voyage wasn’t great for Fjord, but he tried to be thoughtful about preparing for this one before they left: praying, kneeling at the bow of the ship, etc. He’s a little disappointed the Wildmother didn’t even throw him a “yo, fam” heads up.

They weren’t sure how to resolve the conflict at first, since Avantika went for Fjord rather than the crystal. No one expected it to get exposed in that way. Travis thought the necklace was a pocket dimension and was alarmed to learn it wasn’t. Travis wants it destroyed along with the third gateway, so until they are he won’t rest easy.

Everyone enjoyed watching them all fail on the battlefield again. (Sam: “You used [Counterspell] so effectively!”) Travis thought he’d said Thunder Step, which would imply Avantika was running, rather than Thunder Wave. Sam says it’s fine since none of them have that spell and he wouldn’t know it anyway.

It’s very difficult for Veth to find reasons to stay with the M9. She loves the adventures and making a difference, but she also wants to come home and have weekends and have a husband and life. “She’s a career girl!” He’s very excited about the possibilities of Caleb’s transportation effectively creating an easy commute for her. He also, as a player, doesn’t want to be the person who’s always leaving the party. “My characters wanna roam!”

Travis was fully tilted that Avantika might have gotten away right before the break. He doesn’t think he could have focused on Vess DeRogna’s task knowing Avantika had gotten away; he was seriously working out how Fjord would leave the party to go make a last stand at the third gate if she’d escaped.

Sam looooves how Matt plays Yeza, but it honestly makes him feel a little worse at how encouraging he is for Veth to chase her dreams. “He’s always like - go shine! Go blossom!” He wants to have the conversation about Yeza feeling a little ignored. It’s fun to share the tales of adventures with Luc & Yeza.

Travis says there’s no way it’s Molly--it’s all Lucien. They don’t know if it was a resurrection, if he’s undead, possessed, etc. Everyone--everyone--rags on Taliesin’s accent work. Brian surreptitiously claims Ashly was brought on to relieve him of the burden of the accent. Poor Ashly, ha!

Initially, Travis landed on the Oath of the Ancients, but it had more nature & pacifism in it than he felt fit Fjord very well. Many of them also had a focus on good & lawfulness, which also didn’t feel quite right; he also wasn’t that vengeful for some of the others. He & Matt got together and discussed options. Matt asked what Travis liked about Fjord; Fjord’s love for the ocean was a huge part of it, since Travis himself also loves the ocean & scuba diving, and so Matt created a custom oath for him. Travis does not plan to post its details, but he thinks Matt will at some point.

Cosplay of the Week! a lovely Scanlan by Air Bubbles Cosplay! Sam tells us the “canon” Scanlan cosplay was actually borrowed hodgepodge, and the boots were falling off all day.

It was really cool to see how Yeza & Luc have made a home in Nicodranas. Felderwin was okay, but kind of your basic D&D fishing village, and she likes the Nicodranas is much better. She’s confident & comfortable knowing her family is safe and sound.

Why is Fjord so interested in finding Sabian? To him, post-orphanage, his time with Vandren was the best of his life & the most love he’d ever received, because he mattered & had worth. It was taken by someone he’d known basically his whole life, so Fjord is not going to let that go. “That fuckin’ bill needs to be paid, my friend.”

Sam acknowledges that he should NOT have looked at his phone in re: the Vilya reveal, but it was pretty surprising! He can’t believe none of them recognized it! Travis points out the M9 had never met, heard of, or known anything about Vilya, so it’s not that surprising. Brian points out Matt has also done a really good job keeping the two campaigns separate, so any references were tasteful. Sam marvels that it was so well done: it was tasteful, had emotional and story impact... “That Matt. He’s getting better!”

Liam texted Sam back something like “oh SHIT.”

Knowing Veth had a chance to help someone else return to her child made Veth feel almost karmically forgiven for being away from her kid, but it also made Veth a little guilty--”this lady wants to desperately return home, shouldn’t I want to go home too?” Caleb’s teleportation spell couldn’t have come a better time.

Sam wants Caleb & Astrid to get back together (well, he says “hump each other”), and Dani’s eyebrows climb off her forehead. Veth/Nott really thinks Caleb needs to have a roll in ze hay, and feels like after meeting her that there is a kindness or vulnerability to her that could be worthwhile. Travis thinks she feels like someone tethered, that it feels like she has a bomb or something in her chest that’ll explode if she tries to leave. Sam thinks Eadwulf is super cool. None of these names are spelled like I think.

Travis found the dinner super frustrating, because he felt Caleb was trying to walk a diplomatic line and he just wanted to backhand Trent.

Fjord is still coming to terms with his feelings for Jester, and the feelings are definitely real, but there’s a lot of timing that he’s considering and he also wants to figure out what the relationship is like outside of constant tension and battle. Fjord is also having trouble figuring out how to exercise the ability to display affection as well since he’s never received them, and is feeling out how to give and receive them. “It’s fine now, because he’s feeling it, but once you say it out loud, or once you come to a point where you make it known to the other side, then what happens? It might be ruined. It might be broken. Or it might not be!” The moment with the porcelain unicorn was too good not to try. Travis also sighs that he’s not a romance D&D guy, “but now I am! Fuckin’ Laura Bailey!” He’s definitely feeling it out and will see how it unfolds in the game.

If Jester hadn’t let go of the Traveler, Fjord would have either attacked the Traveler or the Moonweaver and tried to kick them both off.

Sam doesn’t think the Traveler’s realized yet what a dick he is. Brian thinks it may not happen in this campaign, but agrees the full weight of what he deserves hasn’t been felt yet. Travis: “Yeah, he came to the edge, but it didn’t cost him anything.” Brian: “Yeah, he’s a real edgelord.”

Fanart of the Week! a beautiful portrait of Molly in the snow by @claygryphon on twitter.

Veth acknowledges that they work for shady people with shady pasts, so Vess DeRogna isn’t her first rodeo, but this time it’s personal. It’s Jaws 2: Electric Boogaloo. Sam can’t commit to actual actions, since Vess is like level 20 or something, but “I will get some kinda revenge. Be it petty or significant, I will get revenge.”

How are they feeling about being in Eiselcross? They’ve only just landed, so not sure yet. The cold is intimidating. They’re excited to explore a new island that’s part of Wildemount, especially with the river of lava running through it. “It’s icy with lava? Sounds like a Dairy Queen.”

There’s still a ton of unknowns regarding the Tombtakers, Vess, the nature of their job, and who’s here on whose orders. They’re excited to see how it’s all going to play out. Travis laughs that he doesn’t take notes, he’s just here to fight things. It just washes over him when Matt starts talking about names and places. “It’ll reveal itself in time. [...] I don’t write those notes down. I don’t even know how to spell it off the bat.” I have never identified more with Travis. Sam actually does pay attention and take notes and was really impressed by Marisha’s dive.

Veth became interested in branding her own spellcraft as soon as she saw Caleb doing it. “That’s what the influencer agents are gonna be looking at. It would be nice to leave the world better than we found it, but also with some branded spells.”

What were Fjord’s thoughts on dropping so much money on the ring & the Ioun stone? It wasn’t about money for Fjord, it was about a cool thing to acquire. It’s why he saves money in his campaign. Caleb needs “as much of a flak jacket as he can get.” He also REJECTS the idea of buyer’s remorse on the ring and touts the effectiveness it’ll have on the lava river.

Travis talks about his old coins - a 340AD coin he bought at a ren faire and a 120BC coin that was a gift from a friend.

Sam marvels at the love and thought that Caleb put into the tower. Sam points out they forgot to go to the top two floors altogether. Travis: “Did the mansion get as much careful planning from Scanlan as the tower did from Caleb?” Sam: Absolutely not. But they were still thinking small in C1, figuring out how things went, and they didn’t have as much detail in their heads yet.

And that’s all the time we have for tonight! We end on everyone whispering way too close into their mics and tapping fingernails on mason jars. A fitting end to this crazy episode, I think.

Is it Thursday yet?

#talks machina #talks machina spoilers #critical role #critical role spoilers #long post for ts

287 notes · View notes

penfullofwordsaheadfullofstories · 4 years

Text

So We Refuse To Take it Tragically

A/N: I’ve just accepted my fate is to be obsessed with this man, so here’s yet another Obi-Wan fic. There will be a second part to this, and I’m thinking a mini series of in-between moments. I won’t give spoilers, but this is NOT my normal type of fic, but he’s an exception to every rule in my book, apparently. Thank you to @caffeine-in-an-iv for being my beta on this, I don’t know where this would be without you!

Thank you also to @beskars for her post here that birthed this. Always blessing us with fuel for the thirst.

And to the one I know IRL that found my tumblr, one I will refer to as Top Voice, this is your final warning to gtfo before feasting your eyes on unprecedented filth and sap.

Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x Force sensitive! Fem Reader (no Y/N)

Warnings: SMUT!!! Cumeating, hair pulling, Comfort Sex, ANGST!! (It has a happy ending later, I promise, but it starts after ROTS, so it’s par for the course) If you’re gonna write not-particularly-pertinent-to-plot-porn, might as well make it unnecessarily detailed, right? As usual, too many feelings for porn, More warnings will be in the tags to prevent spoilers

Title from one of my favorite quotes:

“Ours is essentially a tragic age, so we refuse to take it tragically. The cataclysm has happened, we are among the ruins, we start to build up new little habitats, to have new little hopes. It is rather hard work: there is now no smooth road into the future: but we go round, or scramble over the obstacles. We’ve got to live, no matter how many skies have fallen.”

-D.H. Lawrence

Tatooine is no place for a baby.

There are no soft surfaces, nor comforts, nor surplus of anything. It’s desolate and deprived and oppressive, but you watch as Obi-Wan shields the child from its harsh, sand-pelting winds with his whole body, despite the fact the child fits in the space between his wrist and elbow. It’s overzealous, but you don’t say anything of it.

The past two days have ripped away nearly everything he held dear, insisting on devastating every tender place. Nothing sacred has been left untouched.

He broke the code long before he met you, and you know part of why his love for you came so easily, why he had no qualms with breaking his vows, was because he’d long since loved the man that became his family in every way that matters.

Love and Light so tightly knit together the fabric of his being one could not be separated from the other.

And you could take on the entire Force with your two fists for how it had rewarded him for it with Hate and Darkness coming from someone so close it shattered something foundational in Obi-Wan.

Yet even now, there isn’t Darkness surrounding his signature. There’s brokenness and his ever-present equilibrium has been replaced by jagged shards. But despite it all, those rugged pieces still reflect light erratically in their shine.

It’s a loss and betrayal that spans many different planes: on one level, there’s nowhere you look in the galaxy beyond just the two of you that isn’t marked by the Empire’s rise in power, marking the end of the Republic he fought for and the fall of the Jedi, his community, comrades, and only home he’d ever known. And on another level, you’ve seen the weight of war and worse in Obi-Wan’s eyes, but nothing, nothing like this.

The pain is panoramic, but it’s also profoundly personal.

Even still, his attention isn’t on himself, but on the fussy bundle in his arms.

You wonder: is it the galaxy that doesn’t allow this man time to heal? Or is it his own choice to throw himself into the need of others so he has a tangible reason to avoid his own torments?

When he places the baby into the arms of the young couple, you know the times ahead will give the answer to that.

Because there aren't the cries of the past few nights to wake either of you, there’s silence.

You long to fill it, to try to bridge this insurmountable void with something, anything you could say. But you know it’s bigger than you. So, so much bigger than you.

Monumental obstacles and tremendous loss find themselves standing in the threshold of an abandoned hut smaller than your flat was on Coruscant.

“Well… it’s not much to look at, certainly. But the moisture vaporator seems to be in repairable condition, and we’re just far enough from town to avoid any curious neighbors. What do you think?” He turns to you, and his eyes, dark circles under and all, turn sharp in their assessment of your response.

“I told you. I’m going wherever you are so long as you’ll let me.” Your voice is gentle but adamant as you remind him.

He walks up from the living room to the threshold of the kitchen where you are, wrapping his arms loosely around your waist. “Be that as it may, I’m asking your input on where we’re going, or living, as your happiness means a great deal to me.”

There’s still no smile, but it’s the brightest his energy has felt since the last time you saw him before he came to your door in Coruscant days ago, whispering a rushed, heartfelt farewell, which you quickly countered with an emphatic, unshakable, “I’m coming with you.”

You look up at him, gliding your hand across his cheek into the hair at the nape of his neck. There’s Darkness at the door of his soul that he’s fighting off every moment, and he has the audacity to speak of your happiness.

You don’t dare bring up his. It’s irony, at best.

So you smile, timid, knowing the gesture in itself might be blasphemous to the tone, but genuine all the same. “We can make a life here. I know we can.”

He scans your eyes, looking to find the authenticity in your statement. “Are you certain?”

He’s not asking about the hut anymore. Or, at least, not just the hut.

“Obi-Wan, I never had any delusion that any life I had with you would be easy. I thought I’d only ever be getting you in secret, sparse moments. Although I’d never, ever wish for it to be under the circumstances that it is, having you like this is better than I ever hoped.”

There’s silence as he processes your words, then a wry twist of his features. “How I wish that your expectations needn’t be so low.”

“No, no, that’s not what I meant.” You incline your head, trying to find the words to convey what you mean.

“Nothing any person or any planet anywhere has to offer me holds a candle to what I’ve found in you, nor will it ever. I’d never trade unshakable wholeness for the transience of materialistic happiness.”

You know this has to resound with him. Is it not within the core set of values he was taught to forsake comfort in any avenue for something far greater?

His eyes flick between yours, gauging, and you can feel him reaching out to feel at your signature to solidify the truth.

If you knew him any less, you might be insulted at his questioning of your trustworthiness. But it’s not you he doesn’t trust. It’s something good willingly giving itself to him that causes his wariness.

The Force can have your middle finger along with your fists.

Then he’s relaxing into you, letting out an exhale that seems heavy with more than just air, and burying his nose in your hair for his next inhale.

****

By the end of the day, you’ve gathered enough supplies for basic necessities and to start on the repairs of the hut. You both snarf down a ration bar before shortly thereafter clearing the blown-in sand off what must have been the bed of the home. It’s a half circle indenture in the wall, and it has a dip obviously made for a mattress or cushion of some sort, but as all that’s available are the blankets bought in town today, you set to fluffing them to some semblance of comfort.

Fatigue pulls you into it far sooner than the suns setting. Last night was your first night without Luke, spent in a room you rented in town. Today was spent traveling to and from the hut, discussing details on what needs to be done, and you? You are absolutely exhausted. You can only imagine what he must feel like.

Obi-Wan secures the lock on the door before sitting on the side of the bed, looking off into nothing for a long, long moment.

You push up to your side, placing a hand on his back. “Obi…”

His shoulder nudges toward your hand, but he cuts you off. “It’s going to get quite cold when the suns set, and since the stove isn’t properly ventilating yet, we’re going to have to work with body heat.”

“I’ll try to mask my reluctance,” you retort.

He turns his face to you then, and just a smidge of humor sweeps across his eyes before he sheds his cloak, followed by everything else until only his pants remain. You’ve long since stripped down to your own sleeping comfort level, so before he can fold his cloak along with the rest of his discarded clothing, you take it and cover yourself with it.

He shakes his head a little at you once he’s done, settling down next to you, throwing the covers over both of you.

“Tell me what you need.” You’re face to face with him, but his expression is unreadable.

“I… I don’t know.” He considers you as if you held the answer to the question you just asked him.

“What about want, then? What do you want, Obi-Wan?” You wish he didn’t have his shields perpetually raised these days. It’d be so much easier to just read his energy.

His hand reaches up so he can stroke your cheek with his thumb. “You’re tired, darling. Rest.”

Ah, there it is. If the answer to the question of desire is him counter offering his own response with the fact you’re tired…

“So are you. But you still want.” You press your body fully against his, dropping your voice down to a whisper. “And so do I.”

You won’t push anymore than that, letting him take or leave the invitation. For you, it’s not even a question. It’s been four months since you last saw him. Since you’d last felt his touch.

You’d spent the last few nights in each other’s arms, but between Luke's shrill cries and the deafening devastation of the events of the days prior, it’d been just that: sleep. Or, what tousled, disturbed counterfeit the circumstance offered you both.

For him, though, there’s an abysmal weariness that digs far beyond lack of sleep, and you don’t dare infringe upon him in any way.

But there’s still a longing present, and even without his Force signature to guide you into his feelings, he can’t hide his eyes.

You watch the moment he makes a decision solidify across his countenance right before he presses his lips against yours. You sigh into it, letting the draw of his skin on yours pull you into orbit.

Because that’s exactly what happens. It’s a kiss for a kiss’ sake, for flavor and fervency and the fullness of each other, but it quickly gains its own momentum when his tongue parts your lips truly.

It’s an acute absence. Not having his energy surrounding you with his shields so far up. But it also gives sharp attention to the press of skin against skin, makes it an anchor and an outlet for all that is still too tender to even acknowledge.

You find grip in his hair, purposefully running your hands the opposite of the way he combs it as he takes your face in both hands and pulls you into him all the more.

When you both need to breathe, he only moves so far away that his lips still brush against yours on every exhale. “I..” he starts, then stops.

The hand still in his hair rakes through it gently, scratching your fingertips against his scalp as you wait for him to complete his thought.

“Let me taste you,” he says at last. You know it's a question from the way he stills, waiting for permission, but it’s phrased as nothing like it.

You raise an eyebrow. “Is that a rhetorical quest…”

“Oh, hush.” He’s already nudging you over onto your back, situating his body over yours, claiming your lips again. You allow yourself to sink into it, cherishing his weight over you, his hand roaming your ribcage, before pulling back to speak.

“I’m sorry, are you now getting on to me for my sass? Because… oh!”

He finds a nipple through the thin fabric of your shirt, pinching softly with a small tug.

“By all means, continue. I was most intrigued.” His smirk is back, but it fixes you with a tinge of worry when it again proves to be a smile only skin deep.

You place two fingers just shy of his forehead, but he catches your wrist in an almost painful clasp. The alarm casted by his expression quickly is washed away by a carefully constructed impassiveness, and your heart sinks.

He has to see it, because he bows his head in apology. “Not tonight.”

And before you have any room to respond, he’s shifting himself down as he lifts your shirt up, placing a single taunting, wet kiss on each nipple before moving even further down, nipping at the skin right below your belly button.

He’s distracting you from what he’s not allowing you access to, and you know it, and you let him anyway. That’s what this is, isn’t it? Distraction from the barrage of the mind. If that’s what he needs, that’s what you’ll give.

As he toys with the hem of your underthings, and you lift your hips to assist their removal, you realize it’s exactly what you need too.

Except he apparently isn’t planning to remove your underwear at all. With a casual flick of his hand, your legs are parted and held like that with a no-nonsense sprout of Force energy. Then he’s simply pulling the cloth to the side and brings his mouth torturously closer, but stops just before contact.

You push up to your elbows to tell him you can’t take much of those teasing breaths he’s taking, blowing hot air against sensitive nerve endings. But when you hear his breath stutter as he just looks, unhurried in admiration, you decide against it, even as you flush at the undivided attention. Sprawling his palms out over your inner thighs, he dips down to press his mouth between his fingers, sucking not-so-gently into the soft skin, sending the flesh into tremors before he’s even really done anything to you.

He says your name as he opens you up with his fingers, parting your folds so everything is bared to his view. You start to squirm, the exposure starting to feel a little too heady, and you’re starting to appeal with the beginning of his name when he leans forward, straight away connecting his lips to your clit. You try to thrust up into it as some shameful noise leaves you, but there’s only so much movement you have with your legs still pinned.

He loves to tease, so you don’t expect him to retract the energy that constricted your legs at the first resistance. Instead, he slides his hands under your ass, pulling you on to his tongue and lets you push your hips into him unchecked.

He hums at your enthusiasm, the reverberation sending your hands into his hair again, which gifts you with even more noises from him.

It doesn’t take long at all, and you’re coming undone on his tongue, biting into your forearm to dampen your cry.

He doesn’t stop until you push at his shoulder, signaling your tender surrender. He obeys, looking up at you from between your thighs, absolutely besotted, eyes shining a shade brighter than before.

Then. Obi-Wan Kenobi keeps his eyes on yours before dipping his head and tilting his jaw, running his beard right where you’re still open and vulnerable, abrasion grating in a way you know you’ll be feeling all day tomorrow.

He licks his lips as he moves back up to kiss you again, letting you taste yourself on him.

He goes easily when you gesture for him to lie on his back so you can straddle him, carefully avoiding any contact where he’s throbbing for you. His hands fall right to your waist, stroking gently as he waits for you to initiate.

You focus your study on the section of his hair that’s fallen in his face, twirling a finger in it, happy to have anywhere to look but his eyes.

He’d normally at least be in your mind by now, and even though you understand it, well, the drought of it is as appropriate for the planet as anything.

You remember too late to raise your own shields against any accidentally too-loud thoughts, as Obi-Wan cups his hand on your chin, forcing your gaze to his, saying your name quietly in calling.

“You have to know, it isn’t anything to do with…”

You interrupt him. “No. No. I won’t have you addressing my insecurities of all things in light of…”

“Please listen, love. I need you to know, it hasn’t anything to do with the love I have for you. That hasn’t changed and never will. I think I need… “ He pauses, solemn in thought. “Time,” he finishes finally.

You knew this already in the pit of your stomach, but hearing him say it, hearing him affirm that it isn’t you insufficiency… you hate that you needed it as much as you did.

And if he needs time? That’s what you’ll give. But he also has a want, evidenced by the brush of him against you when you scoot yourself down his torso.

You take the hem of his pants with you when you continue down, ridding him of them and his shorts. But when you wrap your hand around him and begin to lower your mouth, he grips your chin again, shaking his head.

“I can’t… please, just.” It’s always an anomaly when he’s at a loss for words, usually ever-so articulate.

A gasp chokes out of you when you feel the phantom of his mind. Not in full, no. With barriers, and it’s projected out, not at all the same sensation to being within it.

It’s desperation. For how long it’s been, for how drained he feels, how he’s not sure how long this will last, and how much he yearns to be inside you.

There’s not even a second of debate in your mind as you take your position on his lap again, lifting your hips, intention apparent. He takes his cock in hand, holding steady so you can start to seat yourself onto the thick push of him.

The hitch in his breath is your only warning before he seizes the undersides of your thighs, halting you from taking him any further.

His eyes are tightly shut, and you know from watching him before that his facial expression is an attempt at borderline meditation, except it’s several long seconds before he achieves anything resembling calm.

It’s as good a time as any to push his hands off you and squirm around to take him a little deeper. You plan on rubbing your victory in, but your smirk is wiped away with a whine at the elation. Instead of stopping you again, he almost imperceptibly thrusts up, and it’s your turn to falter, slamming your hands into his chest, nails digging in, working against your weight trying to pull you down onto him.

It goes on like that, until you’re both bordering on hysteria before you’ve even fully taken him. You can’t figure out if it’s a worse torment to keep delaying or continuing.

Obi-Wan seems to have come to his own conclusion to that, as he finally opens his eyes, locking them with yours as he places his palms flat on the tops of your thighs and pushes down until your skin is flush with his.

You pull a hand up, biting on your fist, trying to stifle the exclamation in your throat.

He pulls it away, voice ragged as he speaks. “I want to hear you, little one. We needn’t hide anymore.”

It’s a dimensional statement. For one, no one is around for miles, a stark contrast to your quarters on Coruscant where you at least attempted to be considerate of your too-near neighbors when it came to noise. For another, it’s the irony of being in hiding from the Empire, but being allowed to be open in your relationship with each other finally.

And the deepest irony is that you both have your barriers up so firmly right now all you can concentrate on is bared skin.

Oh, but what a beautiful spanse of bared skin he is. Freckled and almost luminously pale, bending and curving with the strength of the form underneath.

He sits up slowly, generating a breathless plea from both of you at the new angle. A search of your eyes asks you a question, and you’re nodding, kissing him with the full brunt of your craving.

You slide up and then down again just as he drives up, and you’ve found your rhythm, just like that.

His hands push you onto him every time you pull up, and his tongue laves your breasts, sucking and biting along your collarbone, as you rake your nails down his chest, over the backs of his shoulders, his scalp, anything you can touch.

It’s enough to send him into a chorus of groans, shoving himself hard up into you.

He doesn’t even speak it aloud, just projects the apologetic warning that he’s on the edge.

When his thumb finds your clit, everything in you goes tense despite the relief. You clench around him, hard, and he instantly moves his hands to your shoulder blades pulling you flush against him as he lets out an unrestrained sound against your breasts.

You push his thumb away from where it’s stilled against you, replacing it with your own. His fingers twitch in their bruising grip, and you can feel him throbbing inside you.

You stay like that for a moment, just letting him ride out his bliss, whispering sweet affirmations into his hair.

When he looks up at you again, his eyes are glassed over. You wonder if it’s ecstasy that is the cause, or something from the bedrock boiling to the surface.

He doesn’t give you a chance to elaborate, flipping you over on to your back. The moment he withdraws, you can feel the mess dripping down your inner thighs.

It takes everything in you to not come at the sight alone as Obi-Wan dips further down your body, parting you and lapping his tongue right where you’re weeping evidence of desire.

You know you have to be making a mess of his face and beard, but he certainly doesn’t seem to mind, indulging on his own spill infused with yours.

When he adds two fingers in you and curls them strategically, searing heat shoots through your lower stomach as you arch against his mouth, his name a high whisper with absolutely no suppression, echoing across the empty stone walls of the home.

He leaves a final tender kiss against you before lying down next to you, pulling you into his arms, and you pull him into yours right back when your limbs remember how to function.

His head drops against yours, and his eyes flutter shut, taking a deep inhale, like he’s trying to fill his lungs with more than just oxygen.

Nothing is fine, and the world is crumbling. But right now, as the suns finally leave the house in dark, as you clasp each other in tight embrace, as sleep pulls you under, you can pretend it’s fine. If only for a moment.

*******

There’s a flash of feeling that startles you awake and into the disorientation that comes from waking in a new place. The sensation worsens when you feel the reverberations of the equivalent of a slammed door in the Force.

You sit up quickly and look over to Obi-Wan, who sits on the side of the bed, head in his hands, fingers brutal in their grip.

You move toward him, and he turns around at the sound. “Go back to sleep, darling. it’s nothing.”

When you fix him with a gaze that essentially translates “bantha fodder,” he just lies back down, pulling your back into his chest, and you doubt the fact you can’t see his face like this is a mistake.

The rhythm of his breathing betrays the fact he is nowhere near sleep, but you find yourself fading off soon again anyway.

****

When you wake in the morning, you’re alone in the bed, which is no surprise. He’s not one to lounge, and if the height of the suns peaking through the window has anything to say, he’s already been up for a while.

His cloak is still tangled in the blankets, though, and you wrap yourself in it, padding outside after doing something about your morning breath.

The hut is situated on a cliff, overlooking a barren valley. The suns glare with their unrelenting eyes of heat even so early in the day, and you stare back as best you can without squinting, daring them to do their worst. They know nothing of the misery that’s already visited this home. They have no hope of competing.

You find Obi-Wan cross-legged near the edge of the cliff. Cross-legged and levitating.

Of course, you know he can do things like this. It’s just such a different thing to see him doing it . You’ve never had a proper morning with him like this, seeing his routine. He was always up before the sun, you with him, gathering moments and soaking them in before he had to leave again.

He looks almost peaceful now, not at rest, but peaceful.

How?

How does he still have so much trust in the Force?

A more lighthearted thought emerges through the grim train, as you notice he’s opted to not put his tunic back on yet.

It doesn’t matter out here, you suppose, there isn’t any other living being for miles around. For that matter, you wonder why he even left the pants.

His voice damn near startles you, not even opening his eyes to address you.

“Although that may be the case, there are some locations more bearable to get sunburn than others.”

You blush at being caught, and gently ensure your thoughts aren’t accidentally projected again, but he doesn’t give you much time to dwell on it.

“Join me?”

As he opens his eyes and descends the couple inches down back onto the ground, you feel your heart do the same. He’s taught you little things, here and there, and you’ve enjoyed it, learning to tap into that constant humming you never had the tools to channel before.

But now?

What interest do you have with The Force that failed the man who served it without fail? You could burn it down for the atrocities it’s committed even in negligence against the man you love.

But there’s been enough burning.

Obi-Wan won’t speak of what transpired on Mustafar, but you’ve caught glimpses. Last night wasn’t the first night you’ve had him back, and it wasn’t the first you’d woken to a severe troubling in his aura.

You’re still not sure if Luke is a fussy baby or simply a very responsive one, as it seemed Obi-Wan was already awake before Luke started crying.

It was only mere seconds before his shields came slamming down, firmly in place, every time.

You can’t tell if he’s trying to shelter you from his feelings or blockade them away from himself.

Maybe both.

But those seconds? They’re long enough. For just a flash of a charred, severed body. Of hateful, pleading, golden eyes.

There’s been enough burning.

“I can’t ever be a Jedi, Obi.”

“That’s not what I’m asking of you.”

He knows your criticisms as well as your compliments over the Jedi. You’ve both discussed it at great length many times, always over a firm understanding and respect, but you’ve never really had long enough to have a conclusion. But you’re not going to push now, not with the fall of it all still so close behind him.

“I should think our relationship itself is testimony that I don’t inherently agree or adhere to all Jedi teachings.”

You drop your eyes, trying to ignore the sweat starting to trickle down your skin from the relentless heat. “I thought maybe you were with me in spite of your better judgement.”

His brow furrows. “At first, that’s what I may have thought too, but it made itself clear that although what transpired between us was forbidden by the Code…” he trails off for a moment, almost hesitant. “...the way Light was and is exemplified any time I have you in my arms presented a solidified case that not always is the Jedi way synonymous with the will of the Force.”

He says it wholeheartedly, but you can tell it pains him. It’s easy to never speak ill of the dead, either of individuals or groups. To glorify and wipe away any transgressions to ensure their memory sparkles as you grieve it.

The harder thing is to grieve everything, both the good you lost and the bad you experienced from the same source.

And there’s another level there. Something that has him patting the spot beside him and giving a heartbreakingly forced smile.

Even through it all, wariness of aspects of his own religion included, he seeks unity with the Force without reservation or resentment.

You don’t fight him anymore.

The war is over, but the battle has just begun, and so help you Maker, you’re going to fight for him to have the chance to heal.

So you sit, mimicking his position.

When he smiles again, it’s much smaller but not at all fake.

“First, clear your mind.”

*****

The days are afflicted with an underlying gloom, full of work that busies the hands but leaves the mind to wander, which wasn’t at all a luxurious thing.

But the nights are filled with unclaimed time, time in an abundance you never had with each other before.

Sometimes it’s shot with silence from the weight of the day, reveling in the presence of another as you work together on the supper dishes.

Or sometimes there’s almost an excitement, despite the labor ahead, of the plans for the place that’s now your home.

“Wouldn’t we have to have some sort of larger equipment to hoist that over the cliff edge?” You wonder aloud to Obi-Wan, speaking of the replacement unit for finally getting some very basic temperature control for the hut. “The way around back is too rough and would scratch it up, and I, for one, wouldn’t want to try pushing it up manu…”

You stop at his smirk he’s trying to hide with tilting his tea cup higher over his lips.

“...Or there’s a Jedi solution to this problem that requires neither, and you’re just letting me ramble on anyway.” You punctuate the end of your statement by tossing a pillow his direction, which just stops. Midair.

There’s so much legend surrounding Jedi, you haven’t really been sure what’s factual and what’s fairytale.

You certainly knew of some of his abilities, but he didn’t tend to elaborate on details of his missions before, and you never argued, knowing it was a liability for you to have that kind of information if anyone ever found out what you meant to Obi-Wan.

He chuckles, not even trying to look a little guilty.

Once you remember to shut your mouth, you get back to planning. “And that same principle just applies to objects of any size?”

He nods. “Same principle, just more concentration required.”

You tuck your feet under you on your chair as you think on that for a second. You’ll have to ask him to teach you that one next. Mediation alone could get rather dull.

“So, for instance, if a great amount of concentration is being spent Force-lifting an object up the cliff, it would leave a Jedi vulnerable to, say… projectiles thrown?” You throw another pillow at him, which just as easily halts next to the other, gravity defiant.

He could have lowered the first one by now. You raise a brow at the knowledge he’s putting on a show for you.

“You’ll have to do better than that, I’m afraid.”

More often than not, the time of the evenings are spent loving and lounging in sheets, savoring the difference of unhurried lovemaking, with no heart-wrenching farewell on the horizon.

But every time you gently ask to reach his mind, he pushes the request and your hand away.

*******

Obi-Wan’s visits to see Luke are met with a level of hostility. The man, Owen, seems wary of him, doing everything he can to cut the visit short as you and the woman, Beru, if you remember correctly, look silently to each other for some relief in the tension.

They already likely know his actual name, but you’re careful to only address Obi as “Ben” here, along with everywhere else that isn’t your hut. It’s precautionary, but if it’s for the sake of protecting Luke and Obi-Wan himself, you’ll do it without any further questions.

But Luke seems to be doing well, and that is ultimately what matters most. It’s hard to believe how quickly he’s grown in the mere weeks that you’ve been here.

The boy might be by far Obi-Wan’s greatest purpose being on this planet, but it’s not his only.

Master Yoda had given him Jedi texts, yes, but also another task for his time here.

You’re thankful to talk about either, as it seems to be one of the few things he’ll open up to you about as it pertains to himself.

But when he goes to meditate alone, calling for his mentor, his father in every right of the term, he comes back more empty than he left.

When you look at him with a too-knowing look, too infiltrating for his comfort, he easily slides into a quip.

“My old master, it seems, won’t appear unless on his own terms. I’m not sure what else I expected, honestly.”

******

You also learn that the man does not cook. Not that you consider yourself an expert, but at the very minimum, you know how to use spices, which on Tatooine come as hot as their weather.

“Is it a Jedi thing to have tasteless food, or is that just you?” You tease as he dices some sort of root at your direction while you sift through the cabinet.

His eyes are full of mischief when he’s quiet for a moment before speaking up. “I would argue there’s concrete evidence that I’m quite happy to indulge in the pleasures of taste.”

You can’t help your blush as his very pointed look.

Dinner is long forgotten after that, but the night is delectable all the same.

*****

Something has shifted in your own Force signature. Something you can’t put your finger on.

It doesn’t seem harmful or threatening in essence, but it makes you wary in a way that makes your skin itch with more than the dryness.

You try not to think much of it. After all, there’s plenty to do between tending to the vaporator, hunting, fending off the Sand People, and your learning to wield the Force.

After rumors of Tusken raiders being nearby, you ask Obi-Wan to teach you combat. This would be starting long before he normally would teach someone, he explained, but he does it anyway. It’s not exactly using the Force at first, having to start with how to even move your body in the event of attack, slowly enhancing those skills with the Force as you become more confident in them.

You look forward to it more than any other task. It gives you a strength you haven’t had before, and it’s a whole different level of connection to the Force when you trust it physically, not just in your mind.

It’s also another level of trust with Obi-Wan, knowing he’d never hurt you even as he enters the role of a potential threat, guiding you through how to handle it.

So you don’t know why today your stomach won’t agree to the way you want your body to move. You push through it anyway, despite Obi-Wan’s concerned questioning.

You lose your lunch into the rocks, and you really wish he wouldn’t pick you up to take you back into the hut, because the shift of what’s up and what’s down doesn’t help at all.

And you wish he wouldn’t dote over you the rest of the day, as if you didn’t feel useless enough already, as if the illness didn’t leave as quickly as it came.

You make a mental note to ensure you don’t let yourself become dehydrated again to that point.

*****

The trips into town are kept to a minimum, trying to keep curiosity away from the new couple. Also, there wasn’t much to do except barter and spend credits, something you both tried not to do a great deal of.

Obi-Wan was sent off with enough Republic credits to get you started here, but it was hit or miss if the vendors took them that day, and he also didn’t want to spend too much at once.

Nothing was more suspicious than surplus here.

The woman you brought the limited produce available from seemed… different this trip.

Obi-Wan was a couple of stalls down from you, negotiating with a man who had obviously jacked up the price on the items needed. Poor man didn’t know what he was in for.

You turned your attention back on to the woman in front of you, and tried to decipher what was different this time and why it felt so familiar.

As you pointed to a basket of hubba gourds, inquiring of the price, she gave you one that you knew for a fact was higher than last time.

You counter offered the same price as last time you were here, and she firmly stated her price again. Ready to stand your ground, you go to state your price again, she puts her hand to her belly, bringing her skirt in around, revealing a small bump.

“Can’t afford your low-ball offers with this one on the way, understand?”

The sky suddenly falls around you in thunderous clamor as the physical realm around you moves on, unaffected and unreachable. Almost mechanically, you place the credits she asked for on the table, not even capable of addressing the obvious manipulation.

Understanding drenches you in its brutal weight as you realize the source why she felt so different this time.

Your hands shake in their clasp on the basket as you pull yourself into a side alley, heaving your breakfast up.

Because you recognize the same difference in her is the exact same one that has changed your Force signature.

It’s because there’s a flickering light of another being’s Force signature within you.

Tagged as requested: @maybege

#obi-wan #obi wan kenobi #Obi-Wan Kenobi #obi-wan X reader #obi-wan kenobi x reader #obi wan x reader #obi wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan x you #obi-wan kenobi x you #obi wan x you #obi wan kenobi x you #Obi-Wan fanfic #tw: violence #tw: pregnancy #tw: trauma #obi-wan x reader #obi wan x oc

516 notes · View notes

littledevil-jpeg · 3 years

Text

Okay, so last post I was giving Lucifer 5B some credit for getting me interested and intrigued about a shitty character, so, as all things should be balanced, here comes the other side of the question. I'll say right off the bat that Lucifer was never a show I took seriously, all at once because of the tone, the way they chose to develop and delve into the themes, the monster-of-the-week format (though also done in spn, there it's redeemed by the darker tone and more subtle theme-development. Obviously, this is S1-S5 I'm talking about) and again the overall way this world works. I've been known to accuse Cobra Kai and even Breaking Bad for coincidence-bending, but they don't even come close to the level of Lucifer here. Then, of course, there's how easy everything is, like a bloody sled on ice: drugs - no problem, kill someone - no problem, infiltrate a mafia group - no fooking problem. How? Well, glaze over that, it's not that important. Except it is. Remember how in that same Breaking Bad Walter's team spent considerable chunks of the show planning, hiding evidence, preparing, measuring little details, diligently covering up their tracks. And they were only involved in a measly drug manufacturing business. Imagine the shit Lucifer runs, with crime bosses, drugs, demons and prostitutes piling out of his front door. Obviously it's a show about angels and demons, and the realism isn't the focus of the program, but still, these things matter. There's always a convenience to it. Like, oh, you need to infiltrate the Russian mafia or some shit? Don't worry, I know a guy - and poof, problem gone. That's not even to mention the universe bending out of shape all around Lucifer, everyone (Chloe especially) putting up with his humiliating bullshit, the fact that he would be kicked out the police in anything even remotely resembling real life, that the mc's get away with almost everything, the unrealistic dialogue that no human irl ever speaks, the second-hand embarrassment, the cheesy "morale" speeches, the dull, predictable cases that are all done by the same formula... and more. So okay, there's a lot, a lot, of problems with this show. Which is why no one really takes it that seriously, we all know it's kind of trashy. But "kind of trashy" is one thing. Now, when season 5 introduces a genuine "evil twin" that we're meant to take with even a bit of seriousness, in the footsteps of such chef d'oeuvres as Dispicable Me 3, when that twin is the most caricature-like villain in recent history, when the allmighty is a buffoon with half a brain, forget omniscient, and isn't even in-line with the stuff he's done before, when one of the main cast is offed as though mid-sentense, with no lead-up, no foreshadowing, no preamble, like a toss of a dice, when the main character is on a race to become God himself, and his love interested Mrs God, and when, oh, Jesus fucking Christ, just stop already! I truly wonder if the writer's room a big dart board with all these drunk-ass ideas stuck onto it, and they blind throw to make the next season. It's finally hitting me now, as I'm writing this, what on god's green earth I watched yesterday.

Why does Lucifer need to become God? Why does a war in Heaven even have to be introduced? Why not focus of the more intricate inter-personal conflicts on Earth, on the characters and their mentalities, on those meaningful arcs that hold actual importance, and emotion, and down-to-earth (lol), well, meaning again. Why do we need a heavenly war? Why does Lucifer need the approval of the angels, when the moral seems to be that he makes himself who he is, not his status, not his people, not his past and not the Silver City (an excellent moral, by the way, so credit where it's due. This self-actualisation business is the second best thing in the whole show)? I get that this is why the majority vote doesn't work, but then what does work? Are they ment to self-actualise into becoming God? Now, I'm aware it's left uncertain whether Luci really is God, so I won't go there for now, but then we have the issue of his resurrection. Was it a reward for self-sacrifice? That wouldn't fit so well, considering all the previous sacrifices that were much more impressive than this one. And what's the philosophy behind that - he's acting out of love? But to what end, if by dying he practically fucked all the other people on Earth, including the very same Chloe he just brough back down? Are these really the qualities for a God to have?

Or did he once again self-actualise, but this time he actualised himself to life? That would truly be a stake-killer. I saw a theory that he finally saw himself as worthy of Heaven, which doesn't quite link to coming back to life. Well, these are perhaps, once again, speculations, and maybe this will be cleared up next season. As for Lucifer's God status, it's a shitty move on the writers' part. Not only was the execution rushed, but thematically, again, Lucifer becoming God to feel worthy of Chloe is nonsense. From a plot and theme standpoint, why does this need to happen? This Godly status holds no meaning, no emotional worth, it's not fullfilling, not symbolic of anything fitting other than that same old "bad to good" and I guess the irony of the Devil becoming God, but the irony is an empty one if it has no real meaning. Which is the case. The whole thing is empty of substance, and I don't know why they went there. You know, it's hollow anyway, not least because Lucifer really doesn't deserve it. Even this season, he is nothing but a child - he acts and thinks like a child, he unchangeably does the same "projecting" bs from season to season to season with no actual sign of emotional maturity other than that in the words of other characters. But you can say he's different all you want, it's not gonna work if the subtle signs of his change aren't there. Say, imagine if Endeavor kept running his mouth about atonement, but kept dutifully abusing his kids - this is that. And yeah, Lucifer loves Chloe in his own way, cares about her, and even comes out of his self-absorbed little world for her, which by the way bugged me about their uneven relationship since season 1 (you know, treating her like shit with a flimsy excuse and then "making up" for it with a grand gesture of sacrifice or a round of angsty suffering. Time after time, every time.)

And finally, of course, there's the issue of how inconsiderate it is to Chloe for him to become God. I mean, it's dead obvious no relationship will be possible there, not without becoming even more unhealthy than it already seems. Themathic significance and meaning aside, even then, even in-universe, it's a shitty thing Lucifer does, again, for himself. So that he feels worthy of Chloe. What she feels, once he's made it his goal to do something, essentially doesn't matter anymore. And the plot fascilitates this splendidly, I mean, she always forgives him without fault like a well-oiled machine. Always, whatever he does, and it's gotten old a long time ago. We know Lucifer can do anything, anything at all, and he will be forgiven - by Chloe, by Maze, by Dan, by Linda, by Amenadiel, by anyone that he needs to forgive him. You'll be lucky if they don't do it the same episode, and extraordinarily lucky if it takes them three or four.

There are many other things to discuss this season, like Dan's ridiculously badly written death, Chloe's whole character stagnation, the, khm, the musical episode, the saturaday morning cartoon villain problem, the fact that Michael manages to descieve an omniscient being, and God himself. I might do those separately, might not, we'll see, as those aren't nearly as interesting to dissect as the above.

Aaaand, anyway, if he is now God, I strongly suspect they'll play the angle of "even though he's God, he stills feels shitty, as true self-love/worth comes from elsewhere" and the usual thing.

#lucifer 5b #lucifer season five #lucifer season 5 #lucifer season six #lucifer #michael demiurgos #michael #lucifans #lucifer netflix #lucifer 5x16 #lucifer 5a #lucifer x chloe #chloe deserves better #chloe decker

27 notes · View notes

chuckbass-love · 3 years

Note

Fic where Chris accidentally gets a girl pregnant( could be a random girl he’s sleeping with or maybe a friend, up to you) he’s super freaked out and tells his mom and family for advice on what to do. But they reprimand him first

Hi lovely anon...

So i received two requests about pregnancy with Chris. One of which is this one and the second is Chris as a teen getting a girl pregnant so i’ll do both as separate fics. This one as adult Chris and the other as it was requested.

I’m sorry to the anon who requested this since i’ve taken a long time to write it. But i hope the wait has been worth it after you read.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than my Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Fem!Reader

Warning: Smut! Sex, vaginal fingering, oral (f receiving), pregnancy reveal, swearing and fluff.18+

Word Count: 5,061

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @jckcriley go check them out❤️

Unexpected

“W-what?” you can’t help but almost choke on your beer as the unexpected words leave your friend of 6 years mouth.

“You heard me” he smirks, sipping on his own beer and leaning back on the couch. His eyes remain locked on yours.

“Chris, maybe you’ve had a bit too much to drink” you giggle, reaching over to take his drink but he pulls it out of the way so you can’t “I’m practically sober, Y/N. You mean to tell me you’ve never thought of me that way?” he raises a brow at you, the one look that always has you secretly wanting to jump his bones.

Sure he’s your friend and has been for 6 years but that doesn’t mean you’ve never had sexual thoughts and fantasies about him. Thoughts and fantasies that have been intruding your rational side for as long as you can remember. But you got used to the friend zone and you have no one else to blame but yourself for remaining there.

Whenever Chris has been single, you’ve been tempted to swoop in and admit your feelings but quickly aborted that mission, refusing to put yourself in a position to be rejected.

And now, he’s sat in front of you at your house admitting that he’s always had a crush on you. You’re shocked and it shows.

Your silence to his question and your failure to keep eye contact gives you away. Why does he have to make you so nervous?

“You have, haven’t you?” he closes the gap between the two of you, taking your beer from you and placing both his and yours on the coffee table before turning your head so that his lustful eyes meet your shy ones.

He doesn’t miss the way your breathing hitches at the feel of his lips grazing across yours without kissing you and he certainly doesn’t miss the way you shiver at the feel of his thick digits dancing down your right arm slowly.

“Chris” you whine, in hopes that he’d just give in and kiss you already. After all, it’s been a long time coming. But instead he lowers his head to your shoulder, pressing a chaste kiss to the exposed skin before moving to your ear. His breath fans your earlobe and his beard tickles your skin “what is it baby?” his whispering has you gasping, more so at the intimate nickname than anything else.

“We shouldn’t do this, it’ll ruin our-”

“What? Our friendship? Well i’m down for that if you are” he licks your earlobe, biting it a little too.

Again, your breath hitches and your heart skips more than just a beat as his lips are now inches from your own and the beer fills yours nose.

Before you even have a chance to stop it, his soft lips meet yours. Moving in sync, almost as if they were made to kiss. His beard yet again tickles your skin, no doubt it’s gonna leave a burn all over after he’s finished with you.

It takes a couple of seconds for you to realise what’s going on but when you do, you let go and it’s incredible. Your arms wrap around his neck loosely and he pulls you onto his lap so that you’re straddling him.

A quick break for a breath of fresh air is taken before going back to it, the two of you going at it more like life long lovers than old friends. You can’t help but wonder if you’re the only friend of his he’s had these kinds of feelings towards. Or if you’re the only one full stop.

“Wait” you push him away slowly, looking right into his eyes “am i the only one?” your question has his brows furrowing in confusion.

“What?” his chuckle leads you to smile “am i the only friend you find attractive? The only friend you’ve thought about in this way?”

“Yes”

And you believe him.

“I never thought i could pursue anything because of the way we are together. The nicknames, the way you act like one of the guys. I just didn’t think it was ever a possibility”

He’s saying all of the right things and right here, right now. You don’t wanna second guess him, so you pull him back to you, kissing him like your life depends on it.

And he just reciprocates the same energy but with a twist. His hands find their way to your ass cheeks underneath your tennis skirt. He gives your soft globes a little squeeze, earning an excited squeal from you which only turns him on more.

“God this skirt. It drives me crazy every time you wear it” he groans as his kisses turn to open mouthed ones along your jawline and down your neck to your sweet spot.

You gotta admit, you could say the same thing to him about his body. Whenever his shirts are open a little to reveal his chest and his tattoos or whenever his biceps bulge out of the shirt sleeves. You feel your legs turn to jelly and it’s hard to play it cool.

“I need you” you blurt out, causing him to take action. He spins you around quicker than you can even keep up with. Your legs are spread apart and now the only thing stopping him from ruining your tight cunt is the thin piece of cotton covering it. Not for long though.

“Oh yeah, how do you need me baby?” his hands graze your inner thighs and more arousal soaks your panties “I need you to touch me” you beg and your head falls back, resting on his shoulder. You look up at him before closing your eyes as you feel the pads of his fingers press down on your bundle of nerves.

“What, like this?” his mouth begins to suck on your neck, no doubt leaving marks for everyone to see tomorrow.

All you can muster is a lazily mumbled “mhmm yes” and that’s all he needs to reach his hands inside. The way his fingers run through your folds before circling your dripping hole is like a feeling you’ve never experienced. Probably because the one and only time you’ve ever been intimate with someone was the quick rubbing of your clit and missionary. Hardly adventurous.

Chris however, has experience. And there’s obviously a reason Minka and Jenny went back for more, right?

Or at least you assume so. Plus many drunken conversations with Jenny gave away some details that at the time had you jealous as fuck. But now, you’re aching with the anticipation of what’s to come tonight.

For example. One party that Chris hosted. You and Jenny were bonding over tequila.

Tara left the group just as she got into it and you can’t say you blamed her at the time. Tara and Chris are best friends and it would be weird for her to take an interest in his sex life shenanigans.

But since you and Chris have only ever been friends, not best friends, you stuck around. If you hadn’t then god knows who Jenny would have told.

She was practically drooling over the sight of him across the room, starting the conversation with a simple “how sexy is he?” almost like she expected you to agree, which you didn’t. Despite agreeing in your head of course.

“Oh you should have seen him last night Y/N, that mouth of his. Jesus. He was like an animal. I’ve never cum so many times from oral”

The memory in itself has you moaning and bucking your hips up into his hand, yearning for more.

His hand pulls from your panties and his fingers hook into the sides of them. He lifts your legs with one hand as his other slides them down and off, discarding them halfway across the room. Not that you care where they land.

The way his arms wrap around both of your thighs, parting your legs whilst they reach down to rub firm circles on your aching and needy pussy, is almost like he’s wanted this as long as you have. Which of course is most likely true since he’s already admitted to crushing on you secretly.

“Please, Chris, i need it” your impatient self can’t control the hunger, but he has other plans.

“All in good time, let me take care of you Y/N”

His thick digits circle your hole once again before two of them slip inside without even a single warning. You’re not used to the feeling but after a couple of pumps in and out, he starts curling them against that familiar spongy spot which makes you forget the stretch you experienced just seconds ago.

Now everything that Jenny said makes sense.

“Fuck, yes. Don’t stop” your hand grips his wrist as you start to grind your hips in circles, wanting to feel the palm of his hand against you throbbing clit. And with your impending first orgasm of many to come, you can’t help but arch your back.

“Gonna cum already, huh? Come on baby, cum for me” he eggs, a third finger adding to the equation. Just what you needed to fall off the cliff in his arms. Your legs shake and your breathing quickens “just like that baby, cum all over these fingers” and you do.

Your arousal drips down his fingers, making the mess he urged you to.

Once he rides you through your high, he pulls out, lifting them to his mouth and the second they come into contact with each other, he’s slurping and sucking them clean.

The sight itself is probably enough to make you cum all over again but before you can, he’s manoeuvring you so that he’s carrying you into your bedroom and laying you down.

More clothes are tossed onto the floor until the two of you are in nothing but your birthday suits and you gotta say, his size is more than impressive.

“Such a beautiful body, might have to keep you like this all the time” he smirks, hovering above you, his huge biceps either side of your head. He lowers his head down so he can capture your lips in a quick but passionate kiss and you can tell this isn’t just a quick hook up to him. Or at least, that’s the way it seems.

You hope.

His lips linger for a couple of seconds before they lower to the valley between your breasts and he inhales your scent instantly, breathing you in like the smoke from a cigarette.

“Smell so good baby. Always smell so good” his fingers tweak at your nipples as the kisses continue, moving lower and lower until he’s face to face with your cunt.

It’s only natural for you to expect some kind of teasing from him but he takes you by surprise by devouring you like a 3 course meal with no feather like touches or dirty talk to get you to beg for his filthy mouth.

“And you taste good too, always knew you would”

The words have you covering your face and the feel of his head shaking on you has you closing your legs on it. The scratching of his beard on your thighs is both awful and incredible all at once. You just simply can’t get enough, running your fingers through his messed up locks and grinding your pussy on his tongue as he sticks it out for you to use as much as you like.

“Gonna make this sweet pussy cum once more before i fuck it, that okay, baby?”

No words are needed, he knows you want it. So he dives back in, spreading your pussy folds and blowing air on your clit before his lips wrap around it for him to suck.

"Cum on my tongue baby, i know you can, give it to me, let me get another taste” he coos and you find your body shaking.

Seconds later, after his words of encouragement and his tongue fucking you. You release for the second time tonight, all over his skilful tongue. You prop yourself up onto your elbows to watch as he makes sure no drop is wasted before he kisses his way back up to you.

As soon as his tongue slips into your mouth, battling with yours, you can taste your sweet arousal and it drives you crazy.

You wrap your legs around his waist and he buries his face in the crook of your neck as he lines himself up “you sure you wanna do this?” he asks, pulling away to look at you, unsure on whether you truly want this but why wouldn’t you want this?

“Chris, i’m sure” you convince, cupping his face with both hands and all of a sudden your pussy is stretching to accommodate his size as he slides home with no pauses to get you used to it. You knew the moment that you saw his cock that it would hurt a little. But the pain soon subsides and is replaced with pleasure.

His thrusting pace picks up immediately and your legs tighten around him as your urge to have him deeper consumes you

“Shit” he grunts, hissing at the feel of your warm walls fluttering around him perfectly, he can’t say this is anything like his many fantasies because the honest truth is it isn’t. It’s better, way better.

Having you underneath him, panting and moaning like he’s always dreamed makes him think heaven is right here with you. A place on earth.

“Taking this cock so well baby, feel good huh?” his voice raspy and gentle at the same time even though the way he’s ploughing into you is far from it.

“Yes. God yes. Chris i’m gonna cum” you mewl frantically, feeling your walls clamp down on him hard as if he’ll leave if you don’t. And if you’re being completely honest with yourself, you don’t want to ever be without him now, you want this for life. You’ve come so far, you’re knee deep in feelings for this man and you hope he’s on the same page.

“Fuck. Cum with me baby, i’m right there with you” his grunting and growling turn to moans that could resemble that of a porn star. So hot and like music to your ears.

The room is filled with the sound of his skin slapping against yours and the sounds of pleasure from the two of you merging into one with little sweat droplets adorning both your foreheads.

“Oh fuck, squeeze me again baby”

“Just” thrust “like” thrust “that”

“Chris, don’t stop” you plead as your toes begin to curl, his head drops so his lips can meet yours the second he spots signs of the coil snapping within you.

And when it does, he’s sucking all of the air from your lungs and muffling your moans.

The way your walls spasm around him spurs his own release on, he twitches a couple times before finally releasing inside of you and painting your walls.

Shockwaves rush through you and you still can’t believe you just had sex with your friend.

Maybe it’ll hit you in the morning and you fear the unknown reaction from the man himself. What if he regrets it? What if you do? Whatever happens, you can’t change the results, all you can do is bask in the glory of this moment finally coming to life after a million times where you’ve over thought how this would go down.

He eventually pulls out, falling down to the spot on the bed beside of you, panting too.

“Well that’s certainly not what i expected to happen tonight” you giggle.

Chris has to say, he feels relieved. All those sneaky glances your way and all those nights out where he was dying to kiss you have finally stopped. Because now he doesn’t have to hide it away, you know and you feel the same.

Having you in his arms now as he pulls you to rest your head on his chest after mind blowing and romantic sex. All of your desires have come true.

“Me neither. What does this mean for us now though?” the question you were saving for tomorrow but you’re thanking the lord that he’s asked first.

“I was going to ask the same thing. But i don’t know, i guess if you want to then we could maybe go on a date, see where things go?” he lifts your head up with his finger under your chin and the second your eyes meet, he kisses you hard.

“I’d love to take you out”

“So, that’s a yes?”

He can’t help but laugh nervously “it’s the easiest yes i’ve ever had to give, i can’t wait. But maybe now we should sleep?" before he even finishes talking you’re yawning and closing your eyes.

And with a quick peck on your forehead, you both get under the covers and drift off.

---------------------

*4 weeks later*

A month after your hookup with Chris and you’ve already had your first date.

He invited you to his place where he had a 3 course meal waiting, that he cooked himself.

Quite impressive and it was actually edible which made you suspect that he had Lisa’s help.

Though he would never admit that to you because he wanted to impress and of course he did.

You’ve not seen him all week, only spoke to him over text or FaceTime since he’s been super busy with work. Meetings galore for upcoming projects. You respect that with his career though, this dating business is going to be a lot like your friendship has been. There’s nothing you can do about it but to tell the truth, you’re kinda glad he’s not been around.

It all started last week when you were puking constantly, your boobs were unbelievably sore and the nausea has been out of this world.

The puking has been mostly in the mornings but this morning was the worst. All of these things had you racking your brain, there had to be a reason behind it and when you calculated the days for your period, you realised you were a week late.

So you drove down to the store, picking up some water and snacks as well as a pregnancy test.

The second you returned home, you rushed to the bathroom to take it and let’s just say waiting for the results to show were the longest few minutes of your life. Your legs were shaking as were your hands. When the timer stopped, you took a deep breath before glancing down to meet your fate.

It reads ‘pregnant’ on the clear blue stick.

How the fuck is Chris gonna take this?

The thought alone makes you want to puke so you quickly drop to your knees, spewing your lunch into the toilet.

This is your life well and truly ruined,

-------------------

Chris knocks on your door, waiting patiently for you to answer and let him in. As soon as he sees your exhausted face, his smile fades.

“What’s wrong?” worry fills his voice and it hurts even more.

Yeah sure, he’s 39 and you’re 30. But does he really want a kid this soon with you. You know he wants to be a dad and he has done for a long time. But even so, it’s way too soon. It’ll be like taking 5 giant leaps when you’ve only just admitted to liking one another a couple weeks back.

“Come sit down” your voice monotone and serious, scaring him further.

“Baby?” he asks but you ignore, taking more deep breaths.

“Look, i don’t really know how to go about this and i’m terrified” you gulp, looking away from him and fidgeting in your seat “so for the last week or so i’ve been experiencing some things. Sickness, nausea and my boobs have been hurting and feeling very sore. You know all that already. But this morning was the worst. I puked so much that i almost fainted when i went to stand”

You can practically see his hands shaking too, still refusing to look him in the eye which is driving him insane.

“Y/N please, what is it?” his patience wearing thin.

Here goes nothing.

“I’m pregnant”

Now you look at him, his eyes wide, his mouth open slightly.

“What?”

Not a question that needs an answer as you’re pretty sure he’s just shocked.

“I-I don’t know w-what to say”

“I don’t expect you to say anything, Chris. I won’t blame you if you want to walk away now”

Hearing you say that riles him, he forces you to look at him “listen here, i’m not gonna walk away. No chance. Two of us made this baby and two of us are gonna take care of it”

Even with the confidence he’s showing, you know him well enough to see the act. He’s terrified too. But it’s probably best to not bring it up now.

Tears fall down your face as he pulls you into a hug, wrapping his arms around you. He can sense that you were worried about being deserted.

But that’s never going to happen.

“We’ll get through this together okay?”

“Okay”

--------------------------

Days pass and Chris is getting even more scared. The news still hasn’t full sunk in yet. You’re carrying his child and yet he feels like he’s too immature to do this and in this head space, there’s only so many people that he can turn to.

He thought it would be best to share the news with his family alone first since he’s never been in this position before. He’s watched his sister go through it and obviously his mother went through it 4 times with him and his siblings.

This is something he’s wanted for a long time. He doesn’t want to mess it up. So it’s time to get help.

“Ma, it’s me” he calls out, closing the front door and searching the lounge before he hears her call back “kitchen”

As soon as he enters, he finds his sister Carly helping his mom with lunch.

“How’re you” Carly asks, hugging him but his heavy breathing alerts her.

“Chris?”

“I need advice, i’m freaking out” and now his flustered state is abundantly clear.

“Why what’s happened?”

The pair stop in their tracks, focusing all of their attention onto him and gesturing for him to speak.

“So you know me and Y/N decided to give dating a go” they nod “about time too” Lisa jokes.

“Well, turns out. She’s pregnant” he grits his teeth, watching as they freak out too. With Lisa’s mouth hanging open and Carly’s eyes widening.

“Say something please”

“Chris, how could you let this happen so soon?”

Not the response he was hoping for.

“I-i”

“Did you even use protection?” Lisa’s eyebrows raise before she bows her head once he shakes his.

“Christopher, you’ve only just started dating this girl and she’s already pregnant. I don’t believe this”

“Chris this isn’t easy you know, pregnancy, parenting. It’s hard and are you sure you two are ready to take such a big step so soon?” Carly adds, calming her voice more than what their mom did.

He doesn’t even have an answer for them.

Because he’s most likely not ready, neither are you but is anyone ever ready to be a parent? Probably not.

“It’s sleepless nights, long days of tantrums and melt downs. Loud screaming, refusing to eat and a horrendous amount of dirty and smelly nappies. Can you handle all of that? Can she?”

“Look I’m terrified enough as it is and I know it’s not gonna be easy. That’s why I came here in hopes that you would ease my mind about this” he sighs, sitting down at the breakfast bar and scratching the back of his head with Carly taking a seat on the stool beside him.

“How does Y/N feel about it?”

“Scared too, assumed i was just going to leave but i reassured her it would be okay and that i’d never leave”

A proud mother moment for Lisa, she knows in this moment that she’s done a good job with raising him and all of her kids.

Her life is a constant never ending string of proud mother moments with them. They never cease to amaze her.

“As long as you have us, you’ll be okay but please let this be a lesson to you. Not using protection is so dangerous. Especially when it’s just casual at first, you need to be careful”

They are right. It was reckless too. Drunken nights in with friends that he fancies aren’t the best time for sex.

Even he can admit that.

“Condoms always” Lisa’s index finger in his face has him laughing and nodding frantically “yes ma’am” they all laugh at his remark and eventually he feels the tense atmosphere leave.

He feels like the news has been accepted.

“God your father might actually pass out when he hears this”

“Can we tell him and everyone else over dinner, tonight maybe. I want Y/N to be here when they find out. I only told you guys because i didn’t know who else to turn to”

“You’re gonna make an amazing father Chris. You just need to believe that and you’ll be set. Am i saying parenting is easy? Certainly not but what i am saying is that i have more than enough faith in you to do this right. You got this, just please do me a huge favour and wrap it up from now on or you’ll end up like me before you know it”

He hugs his sister tight, squeezing her and letting out the biggest deep breath ever “love you. What would i do without you?”

“I honestly don’t know”

Chris says goodbye to them before heading over to your place and Lisa texts the family group chat, asking if everyone is free to join for dinner.

Once you become aware of the plan, you freak out and hours later you’re still deciding what to even dress yourself in.

“But what am i even going to wear?”

“What if they don’t take it well?"

Chris has to eventually hold you in place to keep you still “you’re starting to resemble that one scene in the grinch baby. Just remain calm. You’ve been around my family loads of times and besides mom and Carly already know. They support us”

He’s right. He’s always right. This is why you two alway got on so effortlessly as friends. He balances your crazy and anxious self out with his calm, cool and collected self.

Plus you both have a shared love for beer, football and cussing non stop.

“Shit, you’re right” you breathe in and out a couple times before settling on some high waisted jeans and a pink jumper. You match it with some Dr Martens before leaving to go and have that dreaded dinner.

You’ve been around his family before, you keep telling yourself this in hopes that it will calm your nerves. The car journey is short and sweet and now you find yourself walking into his parent’s house.

All eyes in view fixate on you two. Everyone knows you both have become a thing but wait until they know you’re knocked up because neither Chris nor you had the brain cells to suggest using a condom.

“Right everyone, dinner is ready” Lisa shouts and there’s a rush to the dining room with you trailing behind. Chris pulls out a chair for you to sit in before taking his own in a spot next to you.

Grace is said and small talk is made as the entire family dig in. You can see Chris getting ready to speak up and your stomach does loads of little backflips due to all the nerves.

“Everyone, me and Y/N have something we’d like to tell you”

Complete silence in the room and now you want the ground to swallow you up.

“So as you all know, we’re a couple now”

“About fucking time” Scott roars, earning laughs all around.

“Well, we’ve got some news and whilst it’s completely unexpected but we’re very excited to tell you that we’re having a baby” you stand up with him as you take in the reactions.

Some are shocked, some are cheering and smiling and others are just eating. AKA the kids.

Congratulations are tossed your way and Shanna is instantly giving you baby name suggestions whilst Scott is hugging Chris and offering to baby sit already.

“I’m so happy for you and if you ever need a sitter, uncle Scotty is where it’s at” you’ll 100% bare that in mind.

As you take your seats again to tuck into more delicious food courtesy of Lisa, Chris leans in “see, nothing to worry about. You’re family already” and with a kiss to your forehead, he continues with his roasting of Scott.

You couldn’t wish for a better family to be apart of or a better family for your child.

---------------------------

General Tags: @deadlymistress24 @coffeebooksandfandom @chris-butt @holtzkinnon @mychemicalimagines @llamadelreyx @haus-of-bitch-talk @buckstaybucky @thewinchestergirl1208 @chrissquares @patzammit @adriannajackson @dummiesshort @cevans-fics @americasass91 @toni9 @aaliferouss @bradfordmyworld @thereisa8ella @rockyrogers @yassspose @randomsevans @evansphnx12

Just Chris & His Characters Tags: @onetwo3000 @persephonequeenofthedead @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @rynabarnesrogers @princess-evans-addict @stxvercgersslut @chris-evanslover @bval-1 @thejemersoninferno @denisemarieangelina @janeyboo

LMK if you wanna be added to my tag list... Thank you x

#chris evans #chris evans smut #chris evans fluff #chris evans x reader #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x fem!reader #cevans #reader inserts #x fem!reader #x female reader #x reader #fanfiction #smut #fluff

126 notes · View notes

nbrook29 · 3 years

Note

Sobbe, 6: Teary kiss🥺

Another anon: 1!!

As always, apologies for the long post. Until someone shares the secret with me on how to make the read more thingy work, this is how it’s going to be :(

Again, I don’t know how to write plotless prompts, hence -->

based on But do you REALLY want the K?

Teary kiss + passionate kiss

***

Robbe lets out another shaky breath trying to gain control over his emotions.

There are people running back and forth next to them, yelling at their kids and dragging heavy suitcases on the tiled floor, rushing to get to their gate on time and yet it feels like the two of them are the only ones existing, foreheads resting against each other, hands reassuringly stroking bony hips and arms looped behind necks holding on for dear life.

They’ve been standing like this for a while, Sander swaying them a little as if to soothe the pain, both of them refusing to let go, not yet, not until that final call is announced.

It all still feels so surreal.

He knew it was coming, obviously, but he naively thought that he managed to prepare himself for this.

But now, when he’s faced with the cold interior of the airport at the early hour, gate number 5 looming over just around the corner, reality finally sinks in.

Five months apart.

He’s not sure how his heart is supposed to survive it.

When Sander burst into his bedroom that fateful Wednesday evening, elation in his eyes, talking a mile a minute about his project winning a scholarship, Robbe pulled him on his bed next to himself, placing congratulatory kisses all over his laughing face, calling him “His Artist” a bit teasingly but also with clear adoration easily detectable in his voice.

Once they calmed down a bit and rearranged their bodies to lie facing each other, the wide smile on Sander’s face started to slip, his hand reaching to touch Robbe’s cheek, thumb stroking under his eye as he opened and closed his mouth several times before uttering words that made Robbe’s smile slip as well.

Columbia University, New York City, five months

And then, he added in a small voice, “I don’t know what to do, Robbe.”

The selfish part of him instantly screamed at him to convince Sander, to beg him to stay, to not leave him. Not for five fucking months.

Robbe only needed five seconds to kill that thought and tell it to shut the fuck up.

His boyfriend lied there, next to him, licking his lips nervously, looking so lost and searching for an answer in his eyes, and Robbe could see he was moments away from declaring that nope, no way, he wasn’t going anywhere.

And that was absolutely unacceptable.

Instead of saying anything, he closed the distance between them and captured his mouth in a searing kiss, hoping it conveyed that he was one hundred percent on board with the plan.

When they broke apart, he shot him a beaming smile. “I can’t wait for you to send me photos of New York street art.”

Sander looked at him with wonder in his eyes, a little unsure if he actually meant it.

“Will you really wait for me for that long?”

“You know I’ll wait for you forever.”

It’s ironic that it was Robbe who spent the last two months reassuring Sander about the trip, squashing any doubt related to their relationship that arose, convincing him that he’s going to be okay left behind. That they are going to be okay.

It’s not that big of a deal, right? Robbe was about to start college anyway, so many exciting times were coming his way. Of course he’s going to wait. He’s going to enjoy his college experience at a film school and Sander is going to conquer New York City, living his best american life, video chatting with him everyday to tell him what he’s been up to. Then, he’s going to come back and they’re finally going to rent a place together. A perfect plan.

So yeah, it’s ironic. It’s ironic because it’s actually Robbe who is a mess now.

The thought of separation hurts so badly but Sander getting a chance to go to New York to study visual arts at fucking Columbia and rejecting the offer for Robbe and their relationship has been out of the question from the start. Robbe would never forgive himself for taking that away from him.

It’s the center of the art world. He needs to go there. If he had decided not to, Robbe would have packed him and pushed him through the plane entrance himself.

“You’re breaking my heart, baby,” Sander whispers in a shaky voice as his fingers catch a runaway tear on Robbe’s cheek.

Robbe can see that Sander is trying to be strong for both of them, as always taking care of him and his needs first and Robbe loves him so much for that that his heart is almost bursting.

But he also doesn’t want Sander to feel guilty or torn over this even for a second. This is supposed to be an adventure of a lifetime. He can’t take this away from him.

“I’m gonna be okay, don’t worry about me.” He shoots him a smile that he hopes looks convincing.

“I hate the thought of leaving you. Not being able to kiss you,” Sander connects their lips as if for emphasis, and the kiss tastes of salt, making Robbe realize that he’s not the only one getting overwhelmed.

Their bubble is brutally burst when the final call to board for Sander’s flight is announced over the speaker.

Robbe can feel his entire body getting filled with desperation all at once at the loud voice but before he can do anything Sander pulls him even closer and kisses him, burying his fingers in his curls. The kiss is bruising from the start, frantic as Sander sweeps his tongue in deeper and Robbe makes sure he gives as good as he gets, kissing him thoroughly, hands clinging to the lapels of his leather jacket.

It doesn’t matter that they already had their main goodbye last night. That they spent all those hours lost in each other, learning each other’s body anew, alternating between sweet and loving, and fast and passionate but not any less loving. It doesn’t matter that their bodies will be marked with mouth-shaped bruises and light scratches for days. It doesn’t matter that Robbe can still feel him.

It doesn’t matter because it wasn’t enough. It will never be enough.

It’s a good thing no one pays them any attention, everyone too busy with their own goodbyes and patting their chest all the time to make sure they have their passport, because the voice in the back of Robbe’s head tells him it’s probably not the most appropriate place for this kind of kissing.

It’s almost impossible for them to stop, to break apart but they don’t have a choice as the line to the gate keeps shortening.

“I’ll try to come home for Christmas, I promise,” Sander whispers into his mouth in between the kisses. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“You know, I left you my beige sweater so you don’t miss me too much.” Robbe’s laugh sounds teary, his body already mourning the loss of contact when Sander puts some distance between them, bending to grab his carry-on bag before letting out a miserable sigh.

“I have to go.”

The fingers of their right hands are still entwined though, neither of them strong enough to break the touch for good. It reminds Robbe of that cloudy afternoon in front of Sander’s school where the boy graciously granted him a second chance for which he still has been grateful every day.

In the end, Sander is the one to let go first but he only does it to then cup his cheeks with both hands and place the sweetest kiss on his lips Robbe has ever gotten.

Then it’s really time to go.

Robbe forces himself to keep the smile on throughout the entire process of boarding, twisting his fingers to keep the emotions at bay. Sander barely pays any attention to the flight attendant in front of him as he hands in his passport absentmindedly, his eyes flying over Robbe’s face as if he’s trying to memorize every single detail from afar, in case he somehow missed something during all those times before.

Once he’s all clear and the woman starts checking on the last passenger, Robbe knows it’s time.

So he watches, gnawing on his bottom lip with hot tears threatening to spill any second now. He watches as the love of his life hovers a bit longer next to the gate, blowing him that last kiss, mouthing “I love you, Robin” with glassy eyes of his own before turning around and disappearing in the long jet bridge.

It is only then that Robbe allows himself to break down completely.

***

Shoutout to @painfully-oblivious @dagcutie and @gele-gordijnen for helping me with figuring out Sander’s major when my brain decided to do me dirty <3

#wtfock

51 notes · View notes

feralnumberfive · 3 years

Text

The Rewatch Academy: Episode 1 of Season 1

"We Only See Each Other At Weddings and Funerals”

I am in no way a good analyst so my little analysis and speculations probably sound a bit goofy or pretty wild and probably mean nothing at all. Everything I put into this post about each episode is purely what I noticed or thought, whether it's funny or serious. I will be making jokes, so please just leave it at that (in no way am I trying to make fun of an actor and or character!) I am also in no way saying I noticed this stuff first. This is just what I noticed while rewatching these episodes

☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂

1x01 | 1x02 | 1x03 | 1x04 |

☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂ ☂

☂️ In the Pilot script, it has a woman giving birth to a baby boy in Poland in 1984 (potentially Five or maybe even Luther??)

☂️ “Picture Book” is an absolute bop and no one can tell me otherwise

☂️ What if someone saw this parade of carriages and noticed that there were seven? Later Reginald announces that he adopted 6 kids, so I wonder if anyone saw the carriages earlier and heard Reginald's announcement and became confused

☂️ The concert hall in the Pilot script is in New York, which I assume is safe to assume in NYC. The script also mentions later that Diego drops the monocle in the Hudson River

☂️ The Pilot script originally had Allison in LA, and Klaus in Amsterdam (which he was supposed to be levitating in that scene)

☂️ Diego was originally supposed to be pretty brutal and violent

☂️ I am a huge POTO fan so having a medley of the songs from the musical is so awesome to hear. The first time I watched this episode and heard the violin starting to play, I was like “Huh, this really sounds like POTO” and then I realized it was! It gave me chills and still does to this day overtime I watch this scene

☂️ The dark and mysterious tones of POTO really matches the vibes of TUA well. It’s just so good, especially as a way to introduce Vanya. The first song Vanya plays is “Phantom of the Opera” which is a nice symbolism when introducing the Hargreeves Siblings. The song itself is Christine discovering who her true Angel of Music is, a strange masked man that everyone knows well but they truly don’t know who he really is, like with the Umbrellas and their separate personalities and struggles as actual human beings and not just as the superheroes the public knows them as. It also plays while showing Diego, who is a mysterious masked figure at that point.

☂️ “Angel of Music” is basically Christine asking her angel to guide her, which is ironic that it plays while Klaus is getting out of a place that guides him down the right path, knowing that he’s immediately going to go do drugs again and to go down the “wrong” path

☂️ I wonder if the voice in Luther’s spacesuit as he receives his message is an automated voice or his robot named “Ben” like in the comics. I doubt it’s the latter, but who knows

☂️ Okay, here’s another POTO thing. Diego picks up his knife and wipes the blood off of it and tells the family “Your family is safe now” right as the start of “Think of Me” plays. The first lyrics of the song are “Think of me, think of me fondly” which can be seen as Diego wants the family to truly view him as a hero that saved them

☂️ Aaaand here’s another! Again, while “Think of Me” is playing, one of the parts in the song where Raoul sings “Long ago, it seems so long ago, how young and innocent we were” plays while the paparazzi begins questioning Allison about her father and siblings

☂️ Okay okay, last POTO thing. I especially love that "Music of the Night" plays when Klaus wakes up in the ambulance at night. It's so awesome! Especially since the song is basically about giving into your darkest desires, which Klaus clearly did

☂️ Goddamn is the music in the show amazing, and I’m not just talking about all of the fun lyrical songs! Jeff Russo you get a thumbs up from me

☂️ Ta-da! Here’s some portraits that are shown of the siblings with Reginald when they were young that are shown in the show

☂️ Even the first person Vanya sees when she arrives home doesn’t greet her/welcome her back

☂️ Emmy and Elliot really played that awkward hug and greeting between Allison and Vanya well. You can feel the awkward tension (hey sisters)

☂️ According to the pilot script, Diego wears his mask practically all the time like in the comics

☂️ Luther was literally supposed to have a gorilla body in the pilot script

☂️ “Oh, YoU gOt BiG, lUtHeR”

☂️ Godddd the song playing while Vanya looks at the books on the shelf in including her own is 👌

☂️ Ah, there’s a book called “Lunar Living”

☂️ It might just be me, but it seems like the light shining onto Five’s portrait is ever so slightly askew

☂️ Vanya leaving the lights on and sandwiches for Five reminds me of someone leaving food outside for a stray cat

☂️ Five was originally supposed to be gone for over 22 years in the pilot script

☂️ I wonder at what point in each of the siblings’ lives did they realize, or at least they thought, their brother wouldn’t be coming home

☂️ Babies

☂️ There’s so many ape and monkey pictures and diagrams around Reginald’s office. Foreshadowing for Luther?

☂️ I love Klaus’s theme. It’s heard in almost every episode https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJa9H8SY4wQ&list=OLAK5uy_k2NJivpu0PIwxrOmPVrqN4umBZaahOGWI&index=6

☂️ Why does Reginald have two pictures of himself featuring aircraft? In one of them he’s outside a private jet and the other is him inside a cockpit

☂️ I must say that the dialogue in the pilot script definitely closely mirrors the dialogue of the comics

☂️ “Told me I should be careful who to trust” 👀

☂️ Something behind Elliot is moving

☂️ I was hoping for this to be a gazelle of some sort above Five’s portrait, but It’s an Gemsbok. However, the Gemsbok is an antelope and all gazelles are antelopes

☂️ “The Walker” playing during the bank robbery scene is 👌👌

☂️ Luther is ready to throw hands

☂️ These robbers really decided to rob a bank at 10:05 am?

☂️ I just love Five popping out of nowhere criss-cross applesauce

☂️ Something that hasn’t been explained/fully shown is Five’s ability to teleport objects. He teleported the gun out of the guy’s hand and replaced it with a stapler

☂️ Five’s teleportation noise reminds me of something going really fast, like an aircraft breaking the sound barrier. It’s almost like a mini sonic boom, but not as loud

☂️ Okay so I’ve noticed this in most of the episodes, but I don’t think when Five teleports he makes an actual noise. I’ll point this out more as we continue through the episodes. At the bank scene when Five is on the counter, it appears that the first time he teleports the bank robber whips around when Five speaks. The second time the robber turns to Five simply because he doesn’t know where he went and he’s searching for the threat

☂️ “That’s one badass stApler”

☂️ When Ben asks if he has to go into the Vault, he looks at Klaus for reassurance even though Luther is the one speaking to him

☂️ Five was still pretty cocky back in his youth. They, or more like Ben, have more bad guys to take care of and he’s just chilling with his hands in his pockets and leaning back/slouching like he’s bored. His tone with the robber also proves that and the way he just happily bounds out of the bank

☂️ Sir, why are you looking at the camera

☂️ Luther’s little wave to the reporters when the Umbrellas come out of the bank is cute

☂️ The pilot script didn’t include a flashback of a bank robbery, but instead to the Umbrellas training when they were younger. There’s too much to screenshot to I’ll summarize it.

-Luther bench-presses over 500 lbs

-Diego has been holding his breath for about six hours and he flips Reginald off

-Klaus levitates stuff

-Allison is slacking off and when Reginald tells her to continue her training she simply rumors him that she doesn’t have to

-Ben is fighting guards and Reginald calls him “Number Six” to which Vanya, who isn’t supposed to be down there, corrects him that his name is Ben and reminds Reginald that they have names

- Five very quickly and quite brutally rips off the heads and limbs of training dummies, snaps their necks, and stabs them. He is referred to as “A ruthless little war machine.” Reginald calls him “Perfect”

☂️ The pilot script implies that Reginald had alien life mounted on the walls of his office

☂️ There wasn’t a dance scene in the pilot script

☂️ Not to get super into detail about this, but Luther’s room is filled with a lots of models and paintings of aircraft, mainly from WWII. Almost all of them are of Allied aircraft, and more specifially Commonwealth aircraft, like the RCAF. So this could be more of a clue to the Umbrellas living in Canada

☂️ Diego giving that Wildebeest head the stink eye aways makes me laugh

☂️ Klaus is dancing with Reggie’s urn in a Waltz fashion, so maybe he’s just doing that or it’s the ballroom dancing lessons they received as children peeing through

☂️ I love Diego’s dancing skills

☂️ Fuck you Five for ruining their dance party

☂️ Honestly Five’s portal is pretty powerful. Here’s a description of it from the pilot script

☂️ I like that when Luther tells everyone to get behind him and Diego copies him with “Yeah, get behind us” Luther lets his brother use himself as a shield instead be pulling the “I’m the leader, I’m the strongest” card

☂️ When Luther and Diego are shielding their siblings, Diego has his arm stretched out to guard Vanya

☂️ In the pilot script Five’s body is smoking when he comes out of the portal

☂️ What if when Five fell out of the portal he got knocked out so he just laid face down on the ground unconscious aksdhfjsafhd

☂️ “So are we gonna talk about what just happened?” No bitch, let him make his sammie first

☂️ Diego and Klaus had some sort of bet on Five’s time traveling in the pilot script

☂️ Here’s another example of Five’s teleportation possibly not making noise. When he teleports around while his siblings are questioning him, it looks like they only look at him when he appears and not when they hear a noise

☂️ Five in the pilot script is actually 62

☂️ “What part of the future do you not understand?”

☂️ I like that Five styled his hair to the exact style it was when he was actually young, but eventually gets looser throughout the season

☂️ Five is so oddly calm when talking to Vanya in front of his portrait

☂️ “Well, there are worse things that can happen.” “You mean like what happened to Ben?” Yeah there’s also an apocalypse on the way lol

☂️ Five actually got a hug in the pilot script!

☂️ An ironic moment from the pilot script considering that Five is an assassin and has killed tons of people but this siblings don’t know that

☂️ When Diego is talking about their names and numbers in the courtyard, Five sighs, which I’m sure he’s just bored/has better places to be and is annoyed, but I’d like to view it as “Shit, I don’t even have a name”

☂️ Funny tidbit from the pilot script during the funeral scene “Whatever the hell you are”

☂️ Diego talks about how he assumed Reginald sent Luther to the moon because he couldn’t stand the sight of him, so he must be talking about Luther being like a “failed” leader or something? Like he couldn’t keep the team/his siblings together? Diego doesn’t know about his ape-like body so he’s not thinking about that.....

☂️ I love that Klaus reaches his arm out to guard Five, and that Five simply glares at him and bats his arm away

☂️ When Luther broke Ben’s statue, I can just imagine Ben yelling at Klaus “Seriously? Klaus, why didn’t you stop them?”

☂️ So I’m sure this is just a continuation error, but you can’t see Five walking away in the shot of Ben’s statue hitting the ground. Considering that he had just left, he should still be visible in the background. Again, probably a continuation error or maybe he even teleported inside

☂️ A detail I love about Luther is that his fingernails are dark due to the gorilla DNA

☂️ The bank robbery scene in the pilot script is after the funeral. Not much was changed for the actual first episode, just a few different scenes. Also the Umbrellas were described as gods

☂️ Vanya drawing the tattoo on her wrist hurts my heart

☂️ “Together, you will stand against the reign of evil” gives me chills

☂️ “This is your home and always will be” is great foreshadowing to S3, and hurts my heart when I think about how it is in fact no longer their home

☂️ When I first watched this episode and saw Pogo watching Vanya I knew something was pretty sus

☂️ Just some gold dialogue from the pilot script during the scene of Five, Allison, and Klaus in the kid area and Five is complaining about coffee (but in the pilot script everyone but Vanya is there)

☂️ “An entire square block. Forty-two bedrooms, 19 bathrooms” goddamn the Academy is HUGE. Also 42 is just one away from being 43 👀

☂️ “I know how to do everything.” Yeah, like survive an apocalypse and professionally kill people :]

☂️ I’ve pointed this out before, but the license plate on the car that Five takes to Griddy’s says HERMES, which is the license plate of his car in the comics

☂️ The exit sign in the background is only half lit up to where it says EX and if my memory serves me correctly that’s the door Vanya and Leonard enter the Academy through in episode 6

☂️ Diego telling Klaus to lean back is like “Ugh I don’t want him with me, but safety first”

☂️ I love that they added his feral chimpanzee smile from the pilot script into he show

☂️ “You won’t be going home.” Cocky smartass strikes again. Not to mention he smiles when he says that. He also says this to the men before he kills them in the pilot script

☂️ Before I even knew about TUA, I had heard of the “Istanbul (Not Constantinople)” scene and looked it up. I remember thinking “Wow, that kid is scary.” Now I think “Wow, that old man is scary.”

☂️ I love the little salute he does before he blinks away, and the way his basically just plays with these men like a cat playing with its prey. He knows he’s going to kill them, but he wants to have fun doing so

☂️ Five had some fancy moves in the pilot script

☂️ Five teleporting his tie around the man’s neck is another example of him teleporting an object. Can we see more of this actually happen in S3 please?? I also love the fact that he takes it off the man’s body and puts it back on

☂️ The way he calmly, or tiredly, snaps the man’s neck is chilling to see from a child’s body. This was also included in the pilot script *chanting* Feral Five, Feral Five, Feral Fi-

☂️ It’s honestly such a cool and iconic scene on the show. It truly shows that Five is fully capable of handling himself, and is/was great at his job

☂️ Having the city at night in the background of Diego dropping the monocle is really pretty

☂️ I really like the way they revealed Ben. Having watched both season and now watching this scene again is a bit awkward when Ben doesn’t talk. He’s probably just tired of Klaus

☂️ “The world ends in eight days, and I have no idea how to stop it.” This line combined with the music and the previous scene of Five in the apocalypse is powerful and chilling and I love it

☂️ I love that they have The Umbrella Academy theme playing during the credits in both seasons

-------

Feel free to comment or reblog with things you have noticed too!

#the rewatch academy #tua #the umbrella academy #umbrella academy #we only see each other at weddings and funerals #tra

50 notes · View notes

jisvnq · 4 years

Text

[ 04:12AM ]

title | movie marathon

genre | fluff, humor, a bit suggestive, older brother!jaemin

warnings | swearing, one quite detailed kiss

word count | 1.8k

requested | by anonymous

description | where jaemin banned you from the dorms, but you sneak in one night to watch frozen and makeout with jisung anyways.

z.txt | i wrote this quite hurriedly and it was supposed to be posted on jaemin's birthday, but our electricity decided to die �� so here it is now, i guess~

"WHAT THE HOLY FU—"

"SHH!" you said urgently, putting your finger up to your lips as Jisung covered his mouth with his own hand. "Jisung, be quie—"

"HEY! Park Jisung!" Renjun's voice came from the next room, knocking loudly on the thin plywood wall separating the two bedrooms. "Quiet down, will you?!"

"S- sorry!" Jisung called back, staring at you with his eyes wide in shock as you haphazardly kicked off your shoes and hopped onto his bed.

He then gave you a look of disbelief, when you just began snuggling under his covers and into his arms with a small grin.

"You!" Jisung whispered scoldingly, setting his laptop down beside him as you made yourself comfy in his lap. "What the— what the absolute hell are you doing in here?"

"I missed you," you mumbled, resting your head against his chest, hearing his quickly beating heart. "All I could do was think of you, but it made me miss you so much I couldn't sleep."

"That's no reason to be here," Jisung said, his actions contradicting his words as he wrapped his arms around you in a tight hug. "You're supposed to be asleep!"

"Hey," you huffed, hitting his forearms lightly. "You're supposed to be asleep too. You told me you were already getting ready to sleep when I called you earlier."

You looked up at him with narrowed eyes and he offers you a bashful grin that made you sigh. "Besides, what are you doing at this hour that made you lie to me? Huh, Park Jisung?"

"Renjun gave me a clear copy of Frozen and Frozen 2," Jisung said sheepishly after your slight scolding. "I was planning on watching it with you next time you came over so I'm checking it out now..."

"Aww," you cooed, reaching up to pinch his cheeks that reddened as quickly as your change in demeanor. "That's so cute~ but Jaemin kicked me out of the dorms the last time he caught us kissing. When do you expect us to have this little marathon of yours?"

When Jisung remained silent, you shook your head, taking his hands in yours.

"Why don't we have the mini-marathon now then?" You suggested.

"Now?" Jisung gave you a look. "You sure we won't get caught? Jaemin will kill the both of us if he finds you in here..."

"Nah," you said with a snort, taking his laptop and placing it back in front of the two of you. "Jaemin won't kill you, he loves you too much. Probably even more than he loves me, but that doesn't matter. I love you more than I love my brother too. I'll restart the video now~"

Jisung wasn't able to say anything with how quickly you changed topics, nothing more than an incredulous laugh able to come out of his mouth. Shaking his head as you excitedly pressed the space bar, to play the video all over again, he rested his head on the top of yours and his eyes gazed down at the bright screen that now played the Disney intro.

You wrapped his arms tighter around you as you felt colder. The warmth his body radiated very much comfortable as the night's chilly air circulated around the room. There wasn't much noise coming from the two of you, who were quite focused on the movie, aside from the bright chuckles and giggles that slipped through your mouths while watching, plus the little teasing side-comments that none of you really took to heart.

"Psh. Kristoff isn't even that good looking."

"Shut up or I'm telling the guys you have a crush on Anna."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Try me, pumpkin."

But halfway through the first movie, that focus didn't last long. Not with Jisung, at least.

If he was going to be totally honest, Renjun had given him the copy of the two movies nearly a week ago. Jisung has already been able to memorize the script and all the songs solely from how many times he's replayed and rewatched the movies.

Every night, he watched them out of complete boredom, as you were banned from the dorm by your brother, who had the misfortune to walk in on one of the many makeout sessions the two of you had.

Though usually, Jaemin would do his best to pretend not to mind you getting all touchy with each other, stating that you were your own people, but you were getting too touchy feely even for his comfort. And so, he decided to ban you from coming over to the dorms for a whole month out of sheer exasperation.

Which, of course, being the naturally clingy person you were, had you whining about it over the phone whenever he had called you. Jisung was honestly surprised you managed to make it to week two before breaking and entering into his room. And it wasn't like he didn't miss you either. He just preferred to play safe so he wouldn't have to get his ass beaten up by Jaemin.

So right now, as he had you square in his lap, comfortably nestled between his arms and against his chest, he found it extremely difficult not to flip you over and pin you down onto his bed so he could kiss the living shit out of you. But he knew you were tired from climbing in through his window, and kissing you would risk the chances of getting caught by your brother at this hour. The last thing he wanted was for you to get kicked out for an even longer period of time.

If he could barely last half a month without having you all to himself, he didn't even want to know how much longer he could.

"Mm," you hummed, feeling Jisung squirm under you. "You good there, Ji?"

"Y- yeah, of course," Jisung said with a cough, squeezing your hands and nuzzling his nose into your hair. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know," you said with a giggle when he inhaled, sighing satisfactorily as he smelled the familiar scent of your shampoo that he missed oh-so much. "Maybe you— h- hey!"

You gasped, feeling his warm hands let go of your cold ones to slip under your shirt, his arms pulling you even closer to him, up higher on his lap, so his lips were level with your neck. "I- I'm actually trying to focus on- on the movie for once!"

Jisung let out a low chuckle as he pressed a feathery kiss to the space between your jaw and your ear and making you squirm. He loved moments like this. Moments where it was him who flustered you, taking you by surprise instead of the other way around like it usually is. "Then focus on the movie, love. No one's telling you not to."

He felt your sharp intake of breath and a smirk made its way onto his face, confidence surging through him like adrenaline as he continued kissing along your jaw down to your neck, his thumbs rubbing circles onto the bared skin of your hips. Two whole weeks of not being able to do anything more than innocent hand holding, sweet cheek kisses, and quick pecks on the lips in the school hallways must have taken its toll on him.

Maybe he was exaggerating and two weeks wasn't much. But he was a growing teenager, and he figured that as much as he needed to eat, he craved for your touch, he craved to touch you. And to say he ate a lot was an understatement.

"Jisung," he heard you whimper quietly, warningly as he began to nibble on your neck, his teeth leaving small red marks on the skin. "Wh- what do you think you're doing?"

"I missed you too much," the boy mumbled, his eyes shamelessly staring down at your lips when you turn around to face him. "Can- can I?"

You nodded and he slowly leaned in, sighing when your lips finally met his. It was slow yet intense, one of his hands settling on the small of your back to gently push you up against him, the other carefully holding the back of your head, guiding your movements to match his.

His tongue slid across your bottom lip and soon he was biting down softly, eliciting a small gasp from you. He used this to his advantage, his tongue slipping into your mouth to meet yours and tracing along the rows of your teeth. Your fingers intertwined with the tufts of his hair as he tilted your head to the side, and you felt his breath hitch when you tugged on the dark strands, the faint sound of the movie playing in the background fading away as you got lost in each other.

But he leaned back rather suddenly, causing the back of his head to hit the headboard with enough force to make a loud bang resound throughout the room, abruptly breaking the kiss as he groaned in pain.

"Ow," Jisung whined, wincing as he held the back of his head. "S- stop- stop laughing! It really hurts!"

"Sorry, Ji," you said, stifling your giggles and bringing your hand up to where his rested, gently massaging the aching bump that began to form on his head. "It was kinda funny though."

"It ruined the mood," the boy pouted, making you laugh. He huffed. "Hey! I said stop laughing! I'm serious here!"

"Alright, pumpkin," you said endearingly, leaning up to press a kiss to his head and turning to the laptop whose screen showed the ending credits of the previous movie. "Let's go watch the next one now, shall we?"

Jisung gave you a sheepish smile. "Right, the movie marathon... but maybe we could do something else instea—?"

"Park Jisung," a groggy voice said as the door opened. "Renjun was complaining about your noise and told me to go check on you. You think you can put your movie marathon on hold tonight?"

"I— uh— yeah," Jisung stuttered in panic, quickly pushing you off his lap. "I was— I was gonna stop anyways—"

"Good," Jaemin grumbled, rubbing his eyes and yawning. "Night, Jisungie. Night, Y/nnie."

"Night, Jaeminnie—" you called back with a snicker before Jisung could put a hand over your mouth.

"Sleep well and—" Jaemin did a double take on the way out and turned around, to see you sitting next to Jisung on his bed, the younger boy covering your mouth with a distressed look on his face. You waved at your brother. "Hold the fuck up. Y/nnie?! How the hell did you get in here?!"

"Uh, I sleep-walked through Jisung's window?"

"Na Y/n."

"Whoopsies?"

167 notes · View notes