Tumgik
#gonna put it in the tags since I put so much effort into this I hope it makes sense
backslashdelta · 11 months
Text
How To Gif: Glass Shatter Effect
By popular demand (ie, 7 people who voted in this poll), here is a tutorial on how to do the glass shatter effect I used to create the first gif in this set.
Tumblr media
I use Photoshop CC 2015 (yes I know it's old) for my gifmaking, but you should be able to apply everything to newer versions of Photoshop. For this tutorial I'll be assuming you know the gifmaking basics, but if not, I would recommend this tutorial, which is the process I use to make gifs. Note that this particular process involves saving all of the frames, importing those frames into Photoshop, and then using an action to convert to a smart object.
Keep reading below the cut to learn how to do this effect!
Before I could start making this gif, I needed three things; the two scenes that I wanted to use, and a video of the glass shattering effect. I already knew the scenes I wanted, so then I took to YouTube to find a video which I can't for the life of me find again (edit: thanks to add1ctedt0you in the replies for linking this video!), but it looked like this:
Tumblr media
Something like this is what you want. Ideally the green part would be entirely white, but as long as there are two clearly different colours you can usually work with it.
This looks a lot slower than the gif that I made, but that's not because of the frame rate - which is exactly the same above as in the final gif - it's just because there are extra frames in this slower one that I cut out. In the video I used, the glass shattering happened very slowly. I didn't want that, so I ended up skipping several frames when I loaded the frames into Photoshop before using my gifmaking action. I just did this by manually selecting one frame, skipping the next several before selecting another frame, and repeating this until I had selected 60 frames.
Tumblr media
After using my gif action, I had a smart object of the glass shatter effect that looked like this:
Tumblr media
That's a much better speed! It still wasn't quite where I needed it to be though. I needed this in black and white, so I slapped a hue/saturation adjustment on the smart object and set the saturation all the way down to -100.
Tumblr media
Okay great, I could start putting the gif together now.
First, I made a copy of the glass shatter smart object, because I'll need that later. Then, I pulled in frames from the scene that I wanted to appear in the hole after the glass shatters, and I used those to create a new smart object with my gif action (we'll call it Scene-bg). I pulled Scene-bg into the same window as the glass shatter objects. Then I created a new smart object by combining one of the glass shatter objects with Scene-bg, which I did by selecting both layers right clicking, and selecting "Convert to Smart Object".
Tumblr media
I renamed this smart object to Shatter-fg. I opened it by clicking on the little icon next to the layer name in the layers window here:
Tumblr media
The most important thing here is that the shatter effect object should be the top layer, and I set the mode to "lighten". This will make sure that the lightest colour of either this layer and the layer behind it is displayed; that means that anywhere that's white in our shatter animation will still show up, but anywhere that's black we'll see what's in the layer(s) behind it.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Then I threw some adjustment layers between them to get the colouring I wanted. I used a curves layer, a hue/saturation layer, and I also added text with an outer glow layer effect. Here's what the layer order looked like and the settings I used for each layer:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
After this process, Shatter-fg looked like this:
Tumblr media
Okay nice, this is starting to look like something! I saved this and went back to the main file with the other glass shatter object.
I needed to invert that other glass shatter object. There's a weird quirk with the version of Photoshop that I use where it doesn't like it when I apply specifically an invert adjustment to a smart object (it appears correctly when editing, but not on export) so I did this by creating a new smart object which included a separate invert layer, but if you have a newer version of Photoshop you can probably just apply the invert adjustment directly. Just note that you'll need to do one of these options; it won't work if you add a separate adjustment layer in the main file, it needs to be applied specifically to the smart object (which we'll now be calling Shatter-bg). It looked like this after I inverted it:
Tumblr media
Once that's done, I made sure Shatter-fg was the layer directly above Shatter-bg, and set the mode of Shatter-fg to "darken" and Shatter-bg to "lighten". Since Shatter-fg is set to darken, it will be visible only when it is darker than the layer behind it. By setting Shatter-bg to lighten, I've guaranteed that the layer behind it will always be lighter (ie, white) in the places we want Shatter-fg to be visible, and will be black otherwise. Once I update those settings, this is what the gif looked like:
Tumblr media
This is all there is to the glass shatter effect itself. Next I pulled in frames from the second scene to fill in the black areas. This layer needed to go below both glass shatter layers, so that it only shows through where the black. Then I added adjustment layers and some text. I used curves, hue/saturation, and vibrance adjustment layers, and I also added the "archer" text below the glass shatter layers so that it would be hidden to reveal the "prey" text. The other text I added above all of the layers, since I wanted this to be visible all the time. Here is the layer order and all of the settings I used for each of the layers:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
I also grouped Shatter-bg and Shatter-fg and shifted them on the timeline so there would be some time to see the background gif before the shatter effect starts.
Tumblr media
And that's all! Then it''s just a matter of exporting the finished product:
Tumblr media
This is the first gifmaking tutorial I've ever made, so I hope I was able to be reasonably coherent and helpful! I'd love to hear if you make anything by following these steps, or even if you just feel like you've learned something reading through this. And if you have any outstanding questions, feel free to reply or send me an ask and I'd be happy to answer!
109 notes · View notes
shrublee · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
u prob cant see these too well but idc.... (I do)
15 notes · View notes
edsheerankinnie · 4 months
Text
Being a swiftie rn is so hard like. Maybe you are Wretched. Maybe you are Fearsome. Maybe you are Wrong.
@taylorswift SPEAK NOW🍉🇵🇸
5 notes · View notes
sherlock-is-ace · 5 months
Text
.
#gonna be depressing in the tags for a moment#pls excuse me#but whenevery i see a pair of friends that are like soulmates together#who laugh and scream about what they love and have so many things in common#i always become the personification of ''i want what they have''#ever since i was a child i would pray (you heard that right lol) to get a best friend who shared my interests and passions#(and who was gay but that's included in interests and passions lol tho i didn't know it at the time)#i dream with the sitcom worthy friendships with the you get the key to my house and you can come in whenever#we just spend days sitting together and not even talking just being there#or the next best thing. find it online!#but that will never happen and i need to accept that#not even for lack of trying... i even went to a hobby class for a whole month trying to make friends irl#but it's impossible for the simplest reason... i don't enjoy it!#every time i try to do something new and out of my comfort zone i fail misserably because it's literal hell to me#how can i make a friend if i cannot talk to people?#online or whatever?!#i can't even talk to the people i know from school or whatever#i put in so much fucking effort and freak myself out!#and it's not working and it won't work and idk what to do about it!#so yeah i don't think i'm capable of having meaningful relationships actually#and i need to really accept that cause otherwise i will forever dream with it#like i need to stop trying to chase after it it's just not gonna happen#i guess people have these feelings about romantic partners? well not me lol#anyways...#angel talks#personal
6 notes · View notes
account-name · 2 years
Text
idk if i'll end up with anything nice enough to post but i am finally out of art block for now and am working on redesigning my designs of the trio
2 notes · View notes
rowarn · 10 months
Text
PLEASE, LOVE ME. PT2
simon riley / reader
FIND PART ONE || read the full thing on ao3
tags: childhood friends, friends2lovers, virgin!reader, soft!simon, protective!simon, afab!reader, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, MDNI
cw: reader is over 20, pining, masturbation (reader), loss of virginity, explicit workplace sexual harassment/assault, so much crying, one-sided love, not-really-unrequited love, vomiting, panic attacks, depression, crying, sex related shame, PTSD (reader), codependency but cute, self-deprecating thoughts, slut shaming, wet dream, dry humping, simon fucks up tho, reference to suicide & suicidal ideation, really nasty argument, reader hits simon sorry, apologizes tho!!!, reader struggles to orgasm, drinking, fooling around while drunk (no sex), breast play, fingering, orgasm denial, simon's a tease, p-in-v, cunnilingus, multiple orgasms, creampie, mating press, missionary, simon's dirty mouth, dirty talk, wet&messy, big cock, uncut simon bc i said so, reassurance & encouragement, some pain upon penetration, clit spanking, post-coital crying!!!!!!, aftercare, briefly edited so apologies for any lingering mistakes
note: this is part two and contains the gratuitous smut portion ur all looking forward to <3
you've loved him since you were children. after a confession when you were 14 went rejected, you vowed to never let your feelings be known again. but after an incident that left you hurt and fragile, you find it hard to keep that promise.
PART 2: 17.9k total: 35.8k
Tumblr media
Things seem to get much better between you. Your anger and resentment towards Simon diminishes significantly and you can finally say you feel comfortable around him again. You wouldn’t say you’ve forgotten everything that happened, you fear that the entire ordeal has left its scar on you. 
But you finally feel ready to truly begin to work on yourself and get to a better place mentally. 
You’re humming to yourself as you dust the surfaces in your living room, cringing in disgust when you see how dusty a particular shelf was. 
Just as you go to give it another swipe, your front door opens and Simon stumbles in, huffing from effort as he carries two armfuls of groceries. 
“Simon!” you cry out, watching with wide eyes from the stepstool you stood on as he ungracefully dropped them on the floor, “Why did you bring them all up here like that?”
“Didn’t wanna make another trip,” he explained lamely, flexing his hands as he looked over all the bags.
“Okay, I guess,” you chuckle softly. 
Simon finally looks up at you, “What are you doing?”
“Cleaning,” you shrug, waving the duster at him, “I haven’t felt like doing it until now so might as well get it done when I feel like it!”
He’s quiet for a moment before he steps over the bags of groceries.His boots thunk heavily on the floor as he approaches you. Suddenly, he wraps an arm around your middle. You squeak in surprise when he very carefully and gently pulls you off of the stool and places you back onto your feet. 
Then he walks away like nothing happened, snatching up a couple groceries up from the floor to take to the kitchen. 
You decide not to comment on his behavior and simply choose to grab a couple of bags and help him out. When you get inside the kitchen, he’s already stuffing things into the refrigerator. You place the bags down and go back to pick some more up, transferring all the bags of groceries near him so he can easily put them away. 
You notice one of the bags has some piping, lightbulbs, wires, and other things you can’t identify. 
“What’s all this?” you ask, holding the bag out to him when he turns to look.
He grunts, closing the fridge, “Gonna fix some shit around here.”
“Why?” you ask, scrunching your nose up as you place the bag on the counter.
“Shithole needs it,” he mumbles, moving to start opening the cabinets, “Since you refuse to let me move you out of this place, I’m gonna make sure it at least functions.”
You hum and nod your head. Simon had attempted to convince you to move out and into an apartment of his own choosing but you flat out refused. He was already paying the rent on this place, you weren’t going to let him spend more money for a different place – because you know Simon would choose somewhere that would cost a lot more than your current flat. 
But you couldn’t deny, the idea of Simon doing a little manual labor around the apartment made your heart flutter in your chest. The way he took care of you and was willing to get his hands dirty just to make sure you were comfortable. The little domestic tasks you could imagine him doing. 
It almost felt like something a husband would do. 
You felt your cheeks flush immediately at the train of thought. How embarrassing and juvenile to think something like that
“I can cook dinner!” you mumble after clearing your throat. 
Simon actually has the audacity to laugh. You frown as he shakes his head, closing the cabinet before turning to you. 
“Absolutely not,” he says.
Your jaw drops, “Why?!”
“Because,” he steps closer, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before breezing past you, “You’re a terrible cook, love.”
You open your mouth to retort but can only huff. Because he’s right. The last time you tried to make dinner for the two of you, you had confused cayenne with cinnamon and made the most diabolical stew known to man. He vowed to never let you cook anything that required more than boiling water since. 
You pout your way back to the living room, mumbling a petulant, “Fine…” as you went.
You didn’t catch the broad grin on Simon’s face as he watched you sulk away. He was just happy to see your vibrance returning before his very eyes.
True to his word, however, he began to do some random odd jobs around the apartment. He changed that damn leaky faucet in the kitchen first. He would never admit it but it was beginning to drive him completely mad. He swore he could hear it dripping into the metal sink basin in his dreams.
Then he fixed the piping in the bathroom so they would stop all that god-awful clanking that practically woke up the entire complex. But after that, he figured he might as well fix the piping under the sinks as well.
That’s when you saw him. On his back, big body sprawled out as he worked underneath the cabinet, wrench in hand and soft grunts of effort coming from him. His t-shirt rose up just a bit, exposing a small stretch of tummy and his happy trail. Every once in a while, you could see his muscles flex and it made your mouth go completely dry. 
You felt like a Victorian man seeing his first ankle on a woman. Ridiculous. 
Sure, you’d seen Simon shirtless countless times – hell, you walked in on him completely naked once or twice. But there was something particularly…delicious about him like this. Unaware, casual, just doing work. 
It made a swell of heat settle in your abdomen. You squeezed your thighs together as you watched him. His biceps flexed and bulged, making the sleeve of his t-shirt grow taut around his skin. His muscles moved underneath the tattoos inked into his skin. 
You dragged your eyes down his body, past his pecs, past the sliver of tummy. You imagined yourself crawling between those thick thighs and unbuckling his belt, tugging at the button of his jeans. You imagined getting to see his cock chub up inside his boxers before you would pull it out and wrap your lips around the leaking tip. 
Salty, you imagine. You’ve always heard that men’s cum and pre-cum would be salty. Would Simon’s taste as bad as some of your friends had told you back in highschool? You hoped not. You couldn’t imagine not enjoying every part of him – even his cum.
You wanted him to shoot in your mouth, let you taste it. You wanted to milk it out of him, give him no choice but to cum down your throat.
“Are you just going to stand there or do you need something?” his voice startled you out of your thoughts.
Wide eyed, you looked to meet his gaze but you found he wasn’t even looking at you, still staring at the piped overhead.
“Um,” you cleared your throat, floundering for an excuse as to why you were ogling him like a piece of meat, “I didn’t want to interrupt you. I-I was just wanting to make sure the shower was okay to use?”
He grunts, letting out a soft sigh  before pushing himself out from under the sink, closing the cabinet before wiping his brow with the back of his hand, “Yeah, go ahead and shower, love.”
You give him a tight-lipped smile, casting one last glance to see that his t-shirt had fallen back into place. Disappointing. 
You trudge out of the kitchen and into the bathroom. Softly, you close the door and turn on the shower. The pipes don’t clang when the water shoots through them. It brings a smile to your face.
Once you’re stripped and standing under the warm spray, you let your hands wander your body. First, you cup your breasts, watching your nipples harden under your own touch before you slide one hand between your thighs. There’s a slickness between your folds that's distinctly different from the water, it’s slippery and sticky. But it makes your touch against your clit easy. 
You bite your lips to keep quiet, scared to death that Simon could hear you from under the sound of the water. You make quick, tight little circles against your clit. The bud is hard and twitches under your fingers. It makes the breath stutter out of your chest. 
You need more room, you realize, hiking your foot up onto a shelf. It spreads you open just a little more, gives you a little more access for your fingers to play. You sigh, head tipping forward to watch as you circle your own clit. 
But the more you touch yourself, the faster that tingling, warm sensation dissipates. You huff through your clenched teeth, frustrated. 
Usually, you could at least feel the beginning of that peak forming but this time…not even close. So you shamefully close your legs and go about your shower as if nothing happened, taking care to wash the slick from between your thighs especially.
As you lay in bed that night, Simon breathing deeply beside you as he slept, you were lost in thought. 
Surely, you were in the wrong for thinking about Simon like that – for getting wet at the sight of him. And then sleeping soundly next to him as if you weren’t some kind of pervert. Maybe you should just confess and apologize to him. 
No. You quickly admonish that thought, glancing over at his prone form. You couldn’t bear to see him be disgusted by you. He’d already rejected you years ago, finalized it and put the nail in the coffin so you would never be dumb enough to do it again. 
What would he do if he found out about your…attraction to him? He practically lived with you now, after everything happened. He was in your flat more than he was on base now. It was only a matter of time before he caught you with your hands dancing in your pants. 
Your cheeks flushed at the idea. Part of you thought it hot – for him to find you needy like that, desperately playing with your clit as you try to make yourself cum. 
But on the other hand, you could see the wrinkle of disgust in his brow and sneer on his face as he walked away. That outcome was not worth it, you decided. 
With a sigh, you rolled over so your back faced Simon and closed your eyes for the night. 
Tumblr media
You both should have known better that the fragile peacefulness between the two of you was just that – fragile, balancing on a delicate precipice that could shatter at any moment. 
The ring of his phone was the break. 
“Answer that for me, love!” he called from the kitchen where he was busy preparing dinner. 
You leaned forward to check the number. It wasn’t in his contacts but Simon never got calls from people unless he knew them. So you slowly slid the button over and accepted the call. 
“Hello?” you mumbled into the phone.
There was a beat of silence before a woman’s voice responded in kind, “Hello?”
“Um…” you swallowed down the apprehension that settled in your chest, casting a glance towards Simon’s back as he stood over the stove, “Who may I ask is calling?”
“I’m looking for Simon,” she said, sounding much more coy than a second ago. She knew his real name and that irked you. People from work always referred to him as Ghost, only those he considered trustworthy or friends were privy to calling him Simon. 
“Um, he’s busy at the moment, can I take a message?” you ask, loud enough for Simon to hear in the kitchen if he was interested in intervening. But he didn’t move. 
“Sure!” she giggled, “Tell him that Victoria really wants to see him again and to call me so we can!”
You swallowed around the lump in your throat, “Y-Yeah, sure. I’ll let him know…”
“Thank you,” she cooed in a sultry tone, “Oh! And tell him I really had a great time last time we were together and that I’m looking forward to a repeat performance.”
“Yeah. I’ll do that,” you assured, hoping you didn’t sound as tense as you felt. 
She giggled before the call disconnected and you were left glaring at his stupid stock phone wallpaper.
“Who was it?” Simon comes to the archway of the kitchen, leaning against the wall. You can’t hear anything cooking anymore so you assume he’s finished dinner.
“Victoria,” you spit the name out like it’s poisonous, “Says she wants to see you again and she had a fantastic time with you last time.”
Simon shifts where he stands, looking down at his feet before looking back up to you, “Alright. I’ll call her back later.”
That sends knives straight through your heart. It aches so badly that you want to bite your own tongue off to make it stop. 
Jealousy, you realize. You’re fucking jealous. Some girl calls and asks for his dick and he just says okay? 
He’s not yours, you tell yourself. He can fuck whoever he wants. 
But that does nothing to quell the inferno raging inside you. 
There’s other feelings brewing inside you; rejection, fear, loss.
You feel bitter that you’re right there and he would still never choose you. He’ll always choose someone else because he doesn’t see you like that. It feels like he’s throwing it in your face, just spitting at you to show you that he doesn’t love you like you love him. He never has and he never will. You’ll never be an option to him because he doesn’t want you.
Then you’re scared he’s going to leave you. He’s going to go to this Victoria chick and leave you all alone so he can get his dick wet again. Just like last time. Maybe he’ll like it so much he wants to stay with her. Maybe he’s going to leave you behind so he can start a new, happy life without having to worry about the dead weight that’s been dragging him down since he was 8. You. His responsibility. His problem. 
You’re so scared that he’s going to be ripped from your grasp. That you’re going to lose him to someone else and it’s going to be you and your pathetic one-sided love for the rest of your life. Fuck, you’ve loved him since you were 4. You’ve loved him for so long that it makes you nauseous to think about. How many people loved one person for this long? 
Please, you wanted to cry to him, please love me. 
Please, just love me back.
“So you’re gonna go then?’ you finally find your voice, bitterness and resentment thick in your tone, “You’re gonna leave me to go to a booty call again?”
He stands up straight at that. Arms cross over his chest, he watches that way you glare at him, heated and teary-eyed. Hurt. 
He knew you still weren’t over the way he left you that time – when you needed him the most. You’d been ignoring the residual hurt that lingered, intent on pretending that everything was fine. He had been doing his best to make up for it but it always felt like one step forward and two steps back with you. 
“I’m not going anywhere,” he assures softly, “I’ll call her back to tell her that it won’t happen.”
He tries his best to remain level-headed and soft, to be reassuring like he knows you need. But your expression doesn’t change. You continue to glare at him with that furious, hurt look in your eyes. 
Suddenly, you stand. 
“I don’t believe you,” you hiss, turning your back to him, storming down the hallway. 
He almost winces when he hears how hard you slam the bedroom door. He thinks about going back there to talk to you but decides against it. You need some space to calm yourself down. 
He eats the dinner he made for both of you alone, putting your half in the fridge for later. He goes about the apartment, locking the door and turning out all the lights. Then he gets to the bedroom door and goes to turn the knob and it doesn’t budge. 
Despite himself, he laughs. He jiggles the knob, jerks the door a little harder like it’ll open with a bit of force. And it might, it’s a flimsy ass door if he’s being honest – he’s forced bigger and heavier doors open before. 
He snaps your name, humor gone from his voice. You don’t answer. 
“Open the damn door,” he snaps, trying the knob again. He gets silence in return so he slams his fist against the surface. The sound is loud enough that it makes his own ears ring, “I said open the door. I’m not playin’ this game with you, sweetheart.”
“Sleep on the couch, Simon!” he hears your wobbly voice call back. Of course you’re in there crying, he thinks.
“I’m not sleepin’ on the fuckin’ couch,” he hisses, leaning his forearm against the door, resting his head against it with a sigh, “Open the door and let’s talk.”
“Don’t wanna talk to you,” you whine, bratty as all hell. He would have laughed if he wasn’t so damn pissed, “Why don’t you go sleep with Victoria since you like her so much.”
You don’t know why you say that last part. You don’t want him to go to her, you don’t want him to go anywhere. The thought of it brings more tears to your eyes. 
Simon is silent on the other side of the door for a long while. You almost think he walked away and succumbed to the couch. You wouldn’t actually let him sleep on that awful thing, of course. You just…you don’t know what the end goal here is, if you’re honest.
“Fine,” he finally spits, “If that’s what you want, I’ll fuck off and find Victoria.”
You hear the floorboards creak under his weight as he walks away. You sit up straight in bed at that, eyes wide as you listen to him stalk through the house. You swear you hear the jingle of his keys and that’s what has you lurching out of bed in a panic.
You almost trip over the sheets as they tangle around your legs but you manage to free yourself and wrench the door open.
“Simon!” you practically shriek, rounding the corner of the hallway to find him standing with his back to you, facing the door.
He’s got his hoodie and mask on, boots firmly on his feet and keys in hand. He stands still, back straight as his shoulders rise and fall with his breathing. But he waits.
“Don’t go,” you find yourself whimpering, “‘M sorry. Come to bed, okay?”
He doesn’t move and that makes your heart pound in your chest. You know he’s pissed, can see it in the way his fists stay clenched at his sides. His fingers twitch and he makes a move for the doorknob and you surge forward, wrapping yourself around his other arm, yanking him away from the door as hard as you can. 
He lets your weight knock him off balance, lets you drag him away from the door. He lets you tug him down the hallway, sniffling and crying as you do. 
“J-Just…” you find yourself frantically tugging his mask off, tossing it away before you rip the hem of his hoodie up. He doesn’t help you or fight you as you try to take it off of him. He just stares blankly at you, like he’s assessing you. You hate it. “G-Get ready for bed, okay? Just…we can go to sleep.”
“Why do you make this so fuckin’ hard for me?” he finally breaks his silence, the question cold and calculating. Like he’s tired. Exhausted, “I keep tryin’ to make it up to you. But every time something goes wrong, you throw everything back in my face and you act like you hate me again. I can’t keep…” he trails off, shaking his head before he sits at the foot of the bed, hands clasped together and head hanging between his shoulders.
“I love you,” you blurt out, a sob breaking out of your lips as you do. Simon doesn’t move. Your hands cover your eyes, as if being blind to his reaction will make the rejection hurt less, “I love you and i-it just keeps messing me up inside. I’m sorry.”
“You love me?” he asks, still no emotion in his voice. 
When you peek at him, he’s in the same position as before, hands clasped, elbows on his knees, head bowed. You have no idea what expression he’s wearing and you’re scared to find out.
“Yes,” you hiccup, sniffling softly, “I’m sorry.”
“Why are you apologizing?” he asks softly, almost solemnly.
“I promised,” you cry, another choked sob escaping you. 
“Promised..?” he doesn’t sound cold anymore, just confused, “The fuck’re you talkin’ about?”
“W-When I was 14,” you whimper, shame filling you as you recall your now-broken promise, “I-I told you I liked you and you said you didn’t feel the same. You told me to never bring it up again and I promised I wouldn’t. B-But…” you sobbed again, stopping yourself from finishing the sentence.
“Fuckin’ hell…” he breathes, bringing his hands to his face, scrubbing them up and down vigorously in a way that looks like it hurts. Then he laughs. 
He fucking laughs. 
It’s like your worst fears come to light. He’s laughing at you, at your confession. At your feelings. A fresh wave of tears fill your eyes and fall down your cheeks. You bite your lips to keep from making your sobs audible anymore. You didn’t want him to laugh at that too. You hang your head, wringing your hands together behind your back anxiously as Simon quiets down. 
“Shit,” he breathes, getting to his feet. He stands before you, cupping your cheeks and forcing you to look at him. He frowns when he sees the utter despair on your face, the heartbreak in your eyes, “No, baby. No, no. I wasn’t laughin’ at you.”
Baby. You catch onto it. He’s never called you that before. 
You dash the spark of hope that it causes. 
He rubs his thumbs under your eyes, wiping the tears away. 
Then, he leans forward and slots his lips against yours. 
It’s like fireworks explode in your chest. Your heart races so fast that you feel lightheaded. You can’t even respond to the kiss in time before he pulls away, your mind is moving too fast for you to process any meaningful thought. But he kissed you. 
Simon kissed you.
“What?” you finally manage to whisper, looking up with wide, shocked eyes, “Why did you..?”
He looks confused for a second, still cupping your cheeks as he looks into your watery eyes, “You really have no idea?” Your brows furrow immediately and you shake your head, “How I feel about you?”
“You feel..?” you dumbly repeat. 
He smiles softly, thumb rubbing softly over your cheekbone, “You really think I don’t feel the same?”
“B-But when…when we were kids I…” you stumble over your words, the truth you’ve believed this entire time seemingly false, “You s-said you didn’t feel the same.”
“Jesus, love,” he huffs softly in disbelief, “You were fourteen. I was seventeen. You were way too fuckin’ young for me, it wouldn’t have been right.”
“B-But then…” you stutter, reaching up to wipe your cheek, “When did you..?”
He shrugs, “Not sure exactly. Suppose sometime after you turned 20 was when I realized I felt somethin’ for you.”
“So you really…” you whisper, snagging your hands into his hoodie to pull him close, “You really…I mean…”
“Love you?” he smiles softly, “Of course I do.”
You lean forward and press your lips to his. He hums, wrapping one strong arm around your middle to pull you even closer. His lips work magically over yours, taking control of the kiss with ease. You easily melt into it, following his lead. It’s not as easy as you thought it would be and you hope Simon doesn’t notice. 
But he does, of course he does. 
He pulls away and smooths the palm of his hand down your cheek before it comes to rest on your jaw. His thumb slides over your bottom lip and he hums.
“You ever kissed before?” he asks, voice calm and level with no teasing to it at all.
Still, heat explodes all over your face. Embarrassment overrides the euphoria of your requited feelings. You try to pull away but Simon’s much stronger and he won’t let go unless he wants to. 
“Hey, don’t run,” he coos softly, turning your face to look back up at him, “I was just askin’.”
“No,” you mumble, still burning with embarrassment, “I-I’ve only ever liked you so…”
“Fuckin’ hell…” he whispers, letting you step back just a bit so he can look over you, “Is that right?”
“You should know that,” you mumble, feeling small under his scrutiny, “You know everything about me.”
“Didn’t think datin’ history was somethin’ you felt like sharin’,” he shrugged off.
“Well, now you know,” you mutter, your gaze glued to the floor.
“That I do,” he hums in agreement, reaching out to brush a hand down the length of your arm. 
A soft, quietness falls over the two of you. You’re not sure what to do and it seems he’s content where he is. He’s watching you, tracking every little shift and fidget you make until he finally seems to take pity on you.
“Let’s get to bed,” he says softly, giving you a soft nudge towards the bed. 
You take the opportunity to dive into bed, yanking the blanket over you as Simon strips himself out of his boots and hoodie. You go to look away as he yanks his belt free with practiced hands but you can’t seem to. He slips the belt out of the loops and drops it on the dresser before unbuttoning his jeans and slipping them off. 
Your mouth waters at the sight of him in a tight pair of navy boxer-briefs slung low on his hips. You can make out the shape of his–
“Enjoyin’ the view?” he mumbles half-heartedly as he turns to root through the dresser to find some sweatpants. 
“Sorry…” you mutter shamefully at being caught. 
He chuckles under his breath, pulling the sweats on before he rounds to his side of the bed and drops onto the mattress, “Nothin’ to be sorry about.”
He leans over you and turns out the tableside lamp. Then he settles into his pillow with a soft sigh.
“Si..?” you whisper.
“Yeah?” you can hear the smile in his voice.
“Are we um…” you clear your throat, “I mean like…are we…together now..?”
You feel him roll over and toss his arms around you. You squeak when he tugs you towards him roughly, securing you against his chest before he kisses the top of your head.
“Do you want to be together?” he asks, muffled by his lips pressed against you. 
“Yes,” you whisper quickly, wrapping yourself around him almost possessively.
He tilts your head up and carefully slots his mouth over yours again. You sigh happily at the feeling. 
You notice that he keeps it a lot slower than he had before, moving his lips carefully against yours. Like he’s trying to make it easier for you to keep up. It makes your cheeks flush again but you sink into the pillow and let him kiss all he wants as you do your best to match his movements. 
His body shifts, torso hovering over you as he rests his weight on his elbows on either side of your head. Your hands rest against his shoulders and simply get lost in the kiss. 
After a moment, he deepens the kiss, sinking into you with his chest pressed against yours. You whimper and wrap your arms around his neck, carding your fingers through his cropped hair. 
One of his hands moves, coming to grip your waist, fingers sliding up the hem of your shirt. It’s like a dream come true. Literally. 
All those nights you spent with your hand between your thighs, thinking of him. Thinking of him touching you like this – with his hand sliding your shirt up a little further every second. You even feel that familiar wetness soaking your panties.
Then why was your heart racing from anxiety instead of excitement? Why did you feel a fearful tremble setting in your thighs, as if your knees would be knocking together if you were standing. Why were you scared?
Before you can stop yourself, you’re shoving your hands against his chest with a weak, “No!”
Simon is off of you in seconds but you can feel his gaze on you in the darkness. You struggle to catch your breath as you lay there, heart pounding in your ears. Your head hurts, you realize with a wince.
“Um…” you find yourself attempting to appease him, “I-I don’t…I’m sorry, I…”
“It’s alright,” he whispers sincerely, settling down into bed with a content hum, “Nothin’ to worry about, love.”
You scoot closer to him and hesitantly place your head on his chest. Simon’s arm wraps around your back and tucks you even more snug against him. You close your eyes and will yourself to relax and sleep as you feel Simon’s comforting hand rubbing your back. 
Neither of you talk about it in the morning. Or the day after that. Or the day after that. You don’t bring it up, even though you want to, and Simon doesn’t try touching you like that again. Part of you wants him to, you’ve been dreaming about his touch for years but once you finally get it, you freak out?
You can’t stop beating yourself up over it. 
But then you think about the anxiety that it had caused. The apprehension. How uncomfortable it felt – how you wanted his hands off of you. 
You sighed, flopping onto your side on the couch where you sat. Your mind was buzzing annoyingly from your thoughts. 
Regardless of your problems, you were happier than ever with him. He was finally yours. Wholly and truly yours. It was bliss. 
“Got a call,” Simon says, snapping you out of your daze, “Gotta leave.”
That makes you sit up, “Leave?”
You finally notice that he’s got his bag packed – the one he only takes when he’s getting deployed. You’re on your feet in seconds, following him to the door. He’s wearing his skull balaclava so all you can see are his eyes – sad, apologetic.
“H-How long?” you ask, unable to ignore the ache in your chest as you watch him.
“Few weeks, probably,” he mutters, placing the bag down so he can tuck his feet into his boots.
He straightens up with a grunt before turning to you. He sighs, gloved hands cupping your cheeks when he sees how sad you look – like a kicked puppy. You wish you could feel his bare hands on you but can’t find it in you to ask. 
“I don’t want you to go,” you find yourself mumbling.
It’s selfish and even a bit cruel of you to voice that desire. Simon’s thumb strokes your cheek in that sweet way he always does and you melt into him. He lets you thump your head against his chest as you suppress your cries, biting your lip so you can keep your tears at bay. 
“I know,” he softly whispers, stroking your back as you cling to him, “I know, but I have to.”
“I know,” you mumble, finally looking up at him. You know your eyes are glassy and you make sure to blink back the tears so they never overflow, “Just be safe and come home, okay?”
He lifts his mask up just enough to expose his lips before he leans down to kiss you. It’s a whole body experience this time. He clutches you against him like his life depends on it, gloved hands fiercely gripping the back of your t-shirt. His lips move smoothly against yours, hand coming up to cup your jaw so he can tilt your head and pull you even deeper into his kiss. He pulls away when he needs to breathe, smiling when he sees the dazed, lovesick expression on your face. He tugs his mask down and lets you go but you stay as close to him as possible. 
“Make sure you stay warm,” he coos, “Gonna start gettin’ real cold in a couple days.”
“I will, Si,” you assure him.
“Left some cash for you to do your shoppin’,” he adds, “I know you’re a shit cook but I left a list of some easy recipes. Don’t burn the flat down.”
You snort and playfully smack his shoulder, “I’ll just buy some cup noodles in that case.”
He rolls his eyes, pinching your side to make you gasp from the ticklish feeling, “Don’t even think about it.”
Your grin falters when his phone makes that obnoxious beeping noise that lets you know it’s something urgent. He sighs, the tranquil happiness between you two broken immediately. He kisses your forehead through his mask and pulls the front door open.
“Keep this locked,” he mutters, stepping past the threshold, “I’ll be home soon.”
He closes the door and you’re left with an emptiness that overcomes you. You’ve always been scared for him when he has to go off on missions – you know that his job is extremely dangerous and he could lose his life at any moment. That thought alone makes a nauseous pit settle in your stomach. You push down the feeling of bile rising in the back of your throat and click the lock on the door with a sigh before you go about your day, trying your best to keep your mind off of him and where he might be in the world. 
True to his word, however, the temperature drops bitterly cold within 2 days after he leaves. There had already been a chill in the air that drove you to turn the heating on just a bit but now it was full blast. But now, it was dipping to freezing and you were anticipating the arrival of snow soon enough as well. 
You wake up one morning, however, and your apartment is bitterly cold. You sit up, confused before climbing out of bed. Your feet are immediately freezing as you step onto the floor. You hiss, wrapping your arms around yourself as you stumble over to the radiator in your room. You touch it and find absolutely no heat emanating from it. 
All the radiators are the same. Absolutely no heat. 
You curse, realizing you have no idea what you’re supposed to do. You curl up on the couch under a heavy throw blanket as you type with bitterly cold fingers into Google, looking for anything that can help you. But it’s to no avail. You can’t understand a thing. 
Your next thought is to call the building manager but you know that’s pointless. The useless man never actually helps with any work for his tenants. 
There’s no way in hell that you can afford to call someone to come and fix the problem. You have money for groceries but if you spent that you wouldn’t have anything to eat. You sigh, resolving yourself to bundling up and trying to stay as warm as you can. 
You pile all the blankets you have into bed and pick out only your thickest, warmest sweaters. 
This is going to be miserable, you think. 
The snow comes just a short week later and it feels even colder. You venture out of your flat to go to the grocery store, picking up ingredients for the dishes Simon wrote down for you and also some cans of soup that you can cook to stay warm. You also throw some boxes of tea and some hot chocolate in with it, figuring why not. Warm drinks will help. 
It’s almost 3 weeks of living like that. It’s miserable and makes your bones ache from how stiff the cold makes you feel. You make sure to eat nice, hot food to keep yourself warm and make frequent cups of warm drinks so you can keep your hands warm for as long as you can. You do your best. 
The worst is showers, though. When you’re standing under the blisteringly hot spray, it’s bliss. But the second you step out and your wet body is hit with the freezing air, you couldn’t have felt more miserable. 
The night Simon walks through the door, he finds you bundled up on the couch sipping a cup of hot chocolate. 
“Simon!” you gasp excitedly, tossing the blankets off to take a running leap at him. 
He huffs contentedly when he catches you in his arms, letting you embrace him for as long as you need. He strips his mask off and brings you in for a delicate kiss.
“Let me wash up,” he mumbles, stalking through the apartment.
“Um, before you do, Si,” you catch him at the entrance to the hallway. He turns to you and looks at you with a brow raised, “The um…heating is broken so…just letting you know when you come out of the shower it’s gonna suck.”
“Ain’t nothin’ I haven’t dealt with before,” he mutters and pauses, “The fuck you mean it’s broken?”
“Heating cut off a few weeks ago…” you shrug, wrapping your arms around yourself as you start to feel the cold creep in again.
“A few weeks ago?” he hisses, running a stressed hand through his hair, “Fuckin’ hell. You didn’t call someone to fix it?”
You pout as he raises his voice, clearly frustrated, “I couldn’t afford it, Si! I had the money you gave me for food but I wasn’t gonna spend that to get the heating fixed. You know the building manager is a piece of shit, not like he was gonna call someone.”
He sighs, crossing his arms over his chest, seemingly thinking something over. Then he turns on his heel and storms into the bathroom, slamming the door.
“I’m sorry, Simon!” you call through the door, “I didn’t know what else to do! Please, don’t be mad.”
The shower turns on and all you can do is look up and sigh in exasperation. The second he’s home and he’s already pissed at you. 
You sulk over to the couch and flop down, tossing your blankets over you as you grab your mug. The hot chocolate is still warm but not as hot as it was. It’ll have to do.
Simon comes out of the shower, gets dressed warmly, and joins you in the living room. He doesn’t even look at you as he makes a move for his bag that he left by the door. You almost think he’s going to scoop the bag up and storm out the door. You sit up, ready to stop him but instead, he stoops down and zips it open. He pulls out his wallet and approaches you. 
“What are you doing?” you mumble, watching him flip the thing open.
It’s old and worn, a simple black leather wallet. He’s had it for as long as you could remember and you’ve put the poor thing through the washer and dryer so many times that you’re shocked it's still intact. 
He pulls out a bank card and promptly hands it to you. Your brain stutters to a stop as you look at it.
“Take it, fuck sake,” he mutters. He sounds annoyed but the way he looks away and his ears turn pink you can tell he’s…shy. 
Simon Riley is fucking shy right now.
You take the bank card out of his hand and look at it, flipping over in your hands, “Why are you giving this to me?”
“So you can use it,” he mumbles, slamming his wallet shut and tossing it onto the table, “That way, in case anything happens you can withdraw from my account for what you need. If an emergency happens and I’m not around, use it.”
“Simon…” you mumble, looking up at him, “Are you sure..?”
“Course I’m sure,” he scoffs, taking a seat beside you before softly rattling off four digits.
“Huh?” you dumbly ask.
“It’s my pin,” he responds, grabbing one of the blankets you have piled on the couch and tossing it on his lap.
“That’s my birthday…” you say softly as you repeat the numbers over and over in your head, “Your bank pin is my birthday?”
He snatches the remote up from the table and turns the TV on without another word. But you can see how pink the tips of his ears are. It makes you beam and before you know it, you’re curling snugly into his side. 
“Love you, Si,” you whisper, earning a kiss to the top of your head in response.
Simon calls the next morning to have someone come by and fix the damn heating. You listen to the man rattle off some information to Simon about what the problem was but it makes virtually no sense to you so you resolve yourself to sitting on the couch and waiting until it’s warm again. 
But even when it’s nice and toasty inside, you still plaster yourself to Simon’s side, snuggling as close to him as you possibly can.
Tumblr media
“I want you to meet my team,” Simon says one morning while he’s making some eggs. 
You’re standing by the toaster, waiting for it to pop up but his words make you turn to him, “You mean 141?”
“Who else?” he huffs, flipping one of the eggs. It sizzles loudly in the pan, “They wanted me to go out with them tonight. Thought you could join us.”
“Really?” you realize how incredulous you sound and then try again, “I mean really? That’s okay with you?”
He nods, plating the eggs, “I think it’s time they met you.”
“I-I’d love to,” you say, unable to hide the excitement you feel. 
You catch a slip of a smile on Simon’s face before the toast pops up and distracts you. 
You have to dig into your closet that evening, after a shower, to find something nice to wear. You figure an occasion like this calls for something a little nicer than just jeans and a t-shirt like you usually wear. But you can’t find much of anything. 
“What’re you huffin’ about in  here?” Simon asks when he walks in, towel wrapped around his waist. He’s still dripping wet from the shower and you can feel the way your mouth fills with saliva at the sight. 
“I uh…don’t know what to wear…” you respond, turning your back to him just as he slips the towel off. Your cheeks feel like they’re on fire, imagining Simon completely naked behind you.
“Wear those nice jeans you got,” he mumbles, grunting as he gets himself dressed, “And that little blue top you got.”
“The cropped one?” you ask incredulously, a brow raised as you turn to him. He’s got some jeans on now and he’s meticulously unfolding a black t-shirt so he can put it on, “I haven’t worn that in a while, how’d you even remember it?”
He shrugs, the muscles in his back rippling with his movement before he tosses the shirt over his head and pulls it down, covering his skin once again, “It’s cute. We’re just goin’ to the pub, love.”
“Okay,” you mumble, reaching into the back of your closet to pull the little shirt out, “If you’re sure this will be okay.”
“I’m sure,” he chuckles softly, grabbing his balaclava off the dresser. But he doesn’t put it on yet. Instead, he sits on the bed and watches you change.
You’re acutely aware of his eyes on you as you strip your shirt off. You keep your back to him, trying to ignore your racing heart. You don’t feel uncomfortable at all, instead you feel…excited. 
Your mind runs wild, imagining him stepping up behind you, kissing your neck and cupping your bare breasts in his big hands. They’re a little rough from his line of work and you wonder what they’d feel like against the sensitive skin of your tits, thumbing your nipples and pinching them a little meanly. 
“C-Can you hand me a bra?” you find yourself asking.
He grunts in acknowledgement and the bed creaks when his weight moves off it. He opens one of the drawers and is behind you in a second. His body heat permeates through his shirt as he presses his chest against your back. 
He slings your bra over your shoulder, holding it with one finger by the strap. You can’t help but tilt your head back to look up at him. He’s towering over you, pretty, brown eyes looking down his nose at you. 
You realize in this position, he could clearly see your breasts but he keeps his eyes on yours. You take the bra from him and he lets you, simply staring into your eyes with that stern silence he has about him.
“T-Thanks…” you find yourself whispering, mouth feeling particularly dry.
He grunts, lips quirked up just a bit before he turns his back and walks back to the bed. You let out a quiet, slow breath, willing your heart rate to go back to normal.
Simon was so exhilarating. Just being around him sets your heart racing and fingers trembling. 
You put your bra on and slip your top over your head, ignoring the sticky feeling in your panties as you do. 
“I don’t know, Si,” you mutter, turning to face him, “I-It’s a little tight on me now.”
The fabric once hugged you nicely but now it was snug. It molded around your breasts, even showing the lines of your bra. The neckline was low, giving a good show of cleavage – it didn’t help that Simon picked one of your more well padded bras. 
Simon looks up, his eyes immediately falling to your breasts. He sucks in a quick breath and looks away, licking his lips.
“Looks fine,” he mutters, standing to pull one of the drawers open again. He searches for a second, brows furrowed until he pulls out the jeans he was talking about. The ‘nice jeans’ as he called them, were just some low rise jeans you’d only worn about 4 times.
You look dumbly at them as he drops them into your hands.
“These?” you scoff, “Simon, I can’t–”
He quiets you with a kiss to your forehead, “Trust me, love.”
He steps out of the room after that, leaving you to your own devices. You’re thankful that you can change your panties without him seeing how saturated and sticky they’ve become because of him. You bury them in the laundry basket and remind yourself that you should do the laundry before he does because you’d be mortified if he found them. 
You don’t even look at yourself in the mirror, afraid you’ll feel too self-conscious if you see what you look like. But you trust Simon’s judgment on what he thinks would look good on you – and you can’t deny that dressing up how he likes feels nice. 
You step into the living room, intent on pulling your shoes on when Simon catches you with an arm around your waist. You gasp as he turns you to face him.
“You look lovely,” he whispers, smoothing his hands up your sides, thumbs slipping under the hem of your shirt to stroke your skin.
You swallow thickly as your heart starts racing in your chest again. He leans down and pecks your lips but pulls back before you have the chance to kiss back. 
“Let’s go,” is all he adds before walking away, leaving you no choice but to follow like the lovesick puppy you are. 
Tumblr media
Walking into the bar, your heart pounds painfully in your chest from pure anxiety. Your hand is clasped tightly in Simon’s as he easily moves through the crowd. You suppose his height makes it easy to see over people. 
“You alright?” he asks, leaning down to whisper in your ear.
“Haven’t been in a bar since I worked at…” you trail off, giving him a half-hearted shrug.
“If you wanna leave, just say the word,” he mutters, giving your hand a squeeze.
“N-No,” you shake your head, shooting him a wobbly smile,”I wanna meet your team at least.”
He smiles reassuringly and gives your hand a tug to encourage you to follow him. He leads you right to a table situated in a corner, three men laughing and drinking. 
“There he is!” the one with the mohawk cheeks, holding up his pint in celebration.
“Shut up, Soap,” Simon grumbles petulantly as he pulls out a chair for you.
Soap, you note to yourself. You know them by name but you’ve never actually seen the faces to put to them. Soap looks like you imagined, a broad grin and pretty, bright eyes – you imagined them green but they’re blue. 
“And who is this lovely companion of yours, Simon?” an older man with a hat and mutton chops asks with a kind smile, eyes on you.
Simon says your name before he sits down with a grunt beside you.
“Price,” your boyfriend supplies when you look curiously at him.
The man in question holds out a hand which you take and softly shake, “Nice to meet you.”
“Had no idea Lt. had someone waitin’ for him at home,” Soap says, a teasing lilt in his voice. 
So you’ve met Soap, Price, and that leaves; your eyes land on the quiet guy sitting back in his chair, a cool smile on his lips. He meets your gaze and his smile broadens – not teasing like Soap’s but purely kind.
“You can call me Kyle,” he gives you a polite nod.
“Gaz, then?” you question, tilting your head to the side. Kyle looks surprised, eyes flicking to Simon who shifts uncomfortably in his chair, “He’s talked about all of you before. I only know your call signs though.”
“John will do fine if you’d like,” Price says, tipping his beer back to take a chug.
“Simon calls me Johnny,” Soap adds, “You’re welcome to as well. Anyone important to the Lieutenant is important to us.”
Out of the corner of your eye you see Simon roll his eyes. It makes you smile. He leans over, nudging you with his knee, “You want anything to drink? I need one.”
“No thank you, Si,” you reply, intent on having a clear head for the night. You’ve never been much of a drinker anyway. 
When Simon’s gone from the table, you suddenly feel incredibly out of place. Price and Kyle have the decency to not stare you down but Soap seems keen on keeping his baby blue’s right on you and a goofy little smile on his face.
“Um…” you shift uncomfortably as you look back at him.
“We’ve never gotten to meet anyone from Ghost’s private life before,” Soap says, saving you from having to think of what to say, “Just shocked s’all.” 
“You’re gonna start giving the poor thing the creeps with your ugly mug,” Kyle chuckles which also makes Soap laugh.
“Sorry about that,” Soap lifts his glass and cheers to you before tipping it back. 
He grimaces slightly as it goes down before slamming his glass back on the table.
“It’s alright,” you respond, “Si’s not really the open book kind. So I understand.”
“How long have the two of you known each other?” Kyle asks.
You find yourself wondering where the hell Simon even is but answer regardless, “Since we were kids. Um, we lived next door. His mom and mine were friends, I guess.”
Soap nods his head, elbows on the table as he gives you his full attention, “You guess?”
You hum, “I’m 3 years younger than Simon. The way it was told to me by my mom is that…his mom came over and,” you couldn’t fight back the smile as you recalled the story.
“Oh this has got to be good,” Soap nudged Kyle excitedly at your grin.
“Told my mom that Simon didn’t have any friends and that he was a…soft-hearted boy and she wanted him to have some friends,” you giggle, holding a hand in front of your face to hide your laughter, “So she wanted to set up playdates with me even though I was still a baby. My mom didn’t have the heart to tell her no.”
Soap tosses his head back and laughs, “No fuckin’ way.”
“I’m shocked to say it but that actually makes him sound cute,” Kyle adds, unable to hide the laughter in his voice either.
“Don’t let him hear you say that,” Price says, but there’s a smile on his face, “Simon’ll knock you out cold on this table.”
“So you and Simon have been together since?” Kyle asks, glass cupped in both hands.
You nod, “Only time we’ve been apart is when he enlisted and had to go off for a few years to train.”
Soap opens his mouth to say something but a large figure finally drops down into the seat next to you. Simon has a glass of bourbon and a glass that he slides over to Soap who catches it with ease.
“Thanks, Lt,” he nods, taking a sip before making that disgusted face again.
“What are you lot talkin’ about?” Simon asks, drumming his fingers against his glass.
“We were discussin’ all your dirty secrets,” Kyle teases with a charming grin.
“Nothin’ too damning I hope,” Simon huffs before he takes a large gulp of his drink. 
The other three men all hide their grins behind their glasses. 
The anxiety you had felt at the beginning of the night is long gone. The task force is full of jokes and laughs and even Simon seems like a different person. 
With you, he’s kind and even soft. He’s by no means gentle or patient. 
But this side of Simon is so jovial and comfortable that it warms your heart to see. He drinks a few glasses and by the end of the night, he’s got a relaxed, lidded look in his eyes that lets you know he’s got a bit of a buzz going on. 
“It was lovely to meet you,” Price says when you all walk out of the bar.
“I really enjoyed meeting all of you as well,” you smile, letting Simon tuck you into his side with an arm wrapped around your waist.
“Get him home safe,” Soap teases, your smile only widening when you hear Simon huff in annoyance. 
You bid goodbye to the three of them and make your way to the car with Simon, plucking his keys out of his hand and forcing him into the passenger seat despite his grumbled protests of how ‘he’s not that drunk’.
When the two of you finally get into your apartment, you let him lock up and turn out the lights while you go to the bedroom and get ready for bed. 
“You looked really nice tonight,” Simon mutters when he finally walks in as you crawl into bed, “I’m glad you liked them.”
“I’m glad they liked me,” you huff, leaning back into the pillows, “They were all really nice guys.”
“Yeah,” Simon hums, tugging his shirt off of his head, taking his mask with it, “They’re good people.”
You nod your head and tuck your knees to your chest while he gets undressed. He slips on a plaid pair of pajama pants and shoves the drawer closed with his hip before yanking the blanket back to make room for his large body. 
You bounce a little on the bed when he drops his weight onto it. He smacks his pillow a couple times before he lays back and sighs. It’s clear he’s still a little buzzed from the way he fights to keep his eyes open.
“Simon?” you ask, turning to face him. 
That makes his eyes open back up before he looks at you, “What?”
“Can I kiss you?” you ask. 
He snorts and it makes you smile. He reaches out and wraps his hand around the back of your head. You let him tug you down, pressing your hands against his firm chest as you kiss him. 
His hand travels down your back as he sighs into your mouth. You pull away briefly to look into his eyes before you kiss him again, this time deepening it as much as you’re able. Simon sighs contentedly, his other hand coming up to caress your arm. 
“I like kissin’ you…” you find yourself whispering against his lips.
He groans at that, the sound going straight to your core. You feel yourself clench around nothing, already starting to leak into your panties. 
“Yeah?” he coos, cupping your cheek, thumbing over your lips, “You can kiss me all you want, love.”
You whimper, surging down to kiss him again. His hands grip your waist, intermittently squeezing you, like he doesn’t know what to do with his hands. 
Suddenly, you feel the warm, slick slide of his tongue against your lips. You whimper and pull back, brows furrowed.
“Shh, love,” he coos, pulling you close again, “Jus’ relax and let me…”
You huff, struggling to catch your breath as he urges you to meet his lips again. You feel his tongue again and eagerly open your mouth, letting him taste the inside of your mouth. You shyly meet his tongue with yours and feel his grip on your waist tighten as he groans in his throat. 
You’re sure you’ve soaked well through your panties by now. There’s an ache in your clit that you long to reach down and relieve – or better yet, have Simon relieve. 
You bet his fingers would feel so damn good against you. You find yourself whimpering into the kiss at the thought alone. Simon lets out a husky laugh into your mouth before pulling away. 
A string of spit connects your lips before it breaks and vanishes. 
With a surge of confidence, you toss your leg over his waist. He grunts when your weight settles on his hips, on his cock. It’s chubbed up against his thigh from kissing you and he knows you can feel it. 
“What’re you doin’, baby?” he huffs, unable to stop his hands from traveling up the front of your body. 
You grab his wrist and boldly slide it under the hem of your shirt. He bites his lip to keep from moaning when he feels your bare breast fill his palm. You see the way his eyes start to roll back before he looks at you again. It makes you throb in your panties and you can’t resist grinding against him a little before he grabs your waist and stops you.
“Si…” you whimper, pressing your hands against his chest, “‘S wrong?”
“Can’t,” he clears his throat and sinks into the bed, “Can’t do this, love.”
“Why not?” you ask, feeling a pit of disappointment in your gut, “You don’t want to? I just thought…”
You feel your face burn with humiliation as you slide off of his lap. Simon lets you, simply laying there on his back, eyes closed and a knit between his brows, as he evens his breathing out. You fight back tears as you sit there, biting the inside of your lip anxiously. 
“Not…not tonight, sweetheart,” he finally says, reaching over to pet your hair, “Been drinkin’ ‘nd I want to be sober for it, yeah?”
It would have been a solid excuse if it didn’t sound so flimsy coming from his lips. Like he doesn’t even believe it himself. 
“Yeah…” you offer, giving him a wobbly smile before turning out the light. 
You’re too embarrassed to cuddle into him that night. 
Tumblr media
“Can I ask you something?” you find yourself muttering as you relax on the couch with him, watching some old movie he picked out, “As long as you promise not to get mad.”
He snorts, taking a sip of his tea, “Won’t get mad.”
“I just want to know…” you clear your throat and sit up straight a little more, going over the question in your head, “Why did you leave that night…leave like that, just to have sex?”
He tenses up immediately, you can feel it. He shifts where he sits, spreading his legs just a little wider so he can sink deeper into the couch, “We already talked about this.”
You wince at his clipped tone, knowing you’re stepping into dangerous territory, “I know but…I want to know the real reason.”
He catches his bottom lip between his teeth and sighs, keeping his eyes trained on the TV, “You think I was lyin’ to you?”
Now he sounds mad. You quickly shake your head, “No, Si. I-I’m not trying to start a fight, I swear. I don’t think you were lying. I just think you…weren’t telling me everything.”
He sighs. You can see the way his jaw ticks when he clenches it, “Is that right?”
“Yeah,” you breathe, scooting a little closer to him, placing your hands on his chest, smoothing his shirt down a bit, “It was just…out of character for you, Si. I was really upset and you knew that. It wasn’t like you to just…leave. Just to get laid.”
He finally looks at you, just out of the corner of his eye. You meet the look, offering him an encouraging smile to show that you’re not upset or anything. 
“All night,” he finally mutters, “You’d been kickin’ in your sleep. Kept wakin’ me up.”
You nodded, a look of confusion on your face. You had no idea where this was going.
“You started sayin’ my name,'' he continued, “Moanin’ my name. Fuck, it was drivin’ me crazy.”
Your face flushes hot when you hear that. It all suddenly comes rushing back to you – what you’d been dreaming about. 
“You threw your leg over mine and I could–” he cuts himself off, his throat moving with how hard he swallows.
“Could what?” your voice comes out shockingly breathy. 
He catches it, looking at you. You can see the way his pupils widen immediately when he meets your gaze. It’s like he can see right through you, see the fact you’re dripping into your panties again. Just from this conversation alone. 
“I could feel how fuckin’ wet you were,” he brings a shaky hand up and runs it through his hair before he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, “Couldn’t fuckin’ deal with it. I had to…let it out somehow.”
“So you knew that I wanted you…like that?” you find yourself asking.
He scoffs and shakes his head, “Didn’t think about it like that. Figured it was just a dream and that’s all it was.”
“Wasn’t just a dream,” you assure, scooting closer to him.
Simon’s breath catches in his throat when you lean over him, resting your hand on the arm rest on his other side, letting it support your weight. You stand on your knees, making you just a little taller than him before you lean down and kiss him. 
He remains completely still, like he’s processing. His hands flounder in the air for a second before he’s carefully pushing you to sit back down. You slump against your heels and look at him, perturbed.
“Why..?”
“I need to make dinner,” he says lamely. 
“Simon…” you admonish, knowing he’s lying. 
He gets up, knees cracking as he does. He winces a little bit before he bends down to pick up the blanket that fell to the floor when he stood. You kept your eyes on him, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth. You almost let him go but before you can stop him, you grab his arm. 
“I don’t know what I’m doing, Simon,” you mutter, “I keep trying to make things go further with you but I just keep making a fool of myself and I–”
“‘S not you,” he assures softly, taking your hand in his, “‘S all me, baby.”
“So why…” you frown, “I want you.”
He shakes his head, “Night you told me how you felt. You sounded scared.” 
You remember, the way his touch had made anxiety fill you. You had wanted him, of course, but for some reason it had just been so damn awful at the same time. You hadn’t really dwelled on why that was. 
“It wasn’t ‘cause of you, Si,” you assured, shifting so your feet were on the floor rather than under you, “I promise. I-I was just nervous, I think. That’s all.”
“I don’t want…” he licks his lips, seemingly thinking over his next words carefully before he says them slowly, “I don’t to hear you sound like that with me again. ‘S why I’ve been avoidin’ it. ‘Cause I don’t want you to get scared again.”
You shake your head, rising to your feet, stepping in front of him. You take his hands in yours and squeeze them, “I don’t want to make a fool of myself with you, Simon.”
He frowns, “You know I would never think poorly of you.”
You smile and shrug, “I know that. I think…that time was just…too soon. After that night at the bar and everything that happened. And then the fact I’m so inexperienced that it’s laughable. I think…I just wasn’t ready for it. I needed to go at my own pace and I have been.”
“I don’t want you to push yourself,” he hums, “I know that night at the bar was terrifying,” he brings a hand up to brush over your cheek, “I understand if you’re not goin’ to be ready for a long time. It’s normal to not be ready after what happened to you.”
You huff, “I’ve been trying to show you that I’ve been ready for a while now, Si. I was anxious at first, yes. But now it’s…like a good kind of nervous.”
“A good kind of nervous?” he mutters, hands moving to your hips to pull you closer. Your breath hitches in your throat and you nod dumbly, “Tell me all about it.”
“L-Like my heart races,” you breathe, “And I feel scared that I’m gonna do something silly and embarrassing but like I want to learn and…and I want to do good for you.”
“Fuck,” Simon groans, dropping his head to rest on your shoulder, “Can’t say shit like that to a man like me, love.”
“Why not?” you whimper, feeling your knees tremble in excitement when you feel his hands start to wander.
“‘Cause…” he whispers, running his hands up your sides, “Makes me think some nasty shit, sweetheart.”
You swallow thickly at the promise in his voice, “Simon…” 
You sound so wrecked already and it makes him moan softly in your ear, “Tell me about it, baby.”
Just like that, you’re spilling your guts to him, “Get so wet for you, Si, all the time. I want you so bad that it hurts.”
“Yeah?” he breathes, finally pulling his head from where he was hiding in your shoulder, tilting your chin up, “Where’s it hurt, baby? Hm? Right in that needy little cunt?”
You whimper immediately, looking up at him with wide, hazy eyes and nod, “T-Tried to touch myself. Thinkin’ about you made it hurt so I couldn’t help myself. Thought about you when I did.”
He hums as you babble to him but his mind latches onto one particular word, “Tried, baby? What do you mean "tried?”
Your cheeks burn hot at the slip up. Would he think you were silly for it?
“C-Can’t do it right,” you confess softly, hoping he doesn’t see how embarrassed you are, “Try so hard but n-nothin’ ever happens.”
Simon moans at that. Loud and unbridled, “What’re you sayin’, baby? That you can’t make yourself cum, s’that it?” You shake your head bashfully, “Fuckin’ hell. That’s adorable.”
“D-Don’t tease me, Si,” you whimper but the seat of your panties is so fucking wet that it’s sticking to you. 
He hums, a predatory smile spreads across his face, “Am I bein’ mean, love?” You nod your head, tearfully staring up at him. It only makes his smile widen, canines popping out, “‘M sorry. Can’t help myself when you tell me ‘bout how you touch your pretty little pussy and just can’t make yourself cum like you need. Think I can do it for you, hm? Want me to try and make you cum?”
You vigorously nod your head, uncaring how fucking needy you look to him. He’s offering to give you what you’ve wanted for years – to give you a real, honest to God orgasm. And you weren’t going to let this chance slip away. 
“Want you on the bed,” he suddenly whispers, “On your back, lose the pants but keep everything else on.”
With a jerk of his head in the direction of the bedroom, you take off. You hear him chuckle behind you at your excitement. He makes sure the door is locked before he heads back to the bedroom. 
You’re there just like he asked, pants pooled on the floor, leaving you in nothing but an old t-shirt of his and a pair of the cutest little lilac colored panties he’s seen. You’ve got your knees pinned together, clenching your thighs but laying perfectly still in waiting for him. 
“So fuckin’ good for me,” he praises, grinning when you whimper and tremble at his words, “Oh, sweet thing likes to be praised, huh?”
You nod your head, “Wanna be good for you, Si.”
“That’s sweet, baby,” he coos, reaching to the back of his collar so he can tug his shirt off of his head. 
Your heart hammers away in your chest when he crawls onto the bed, hands on either side of your head. He looks so big like this, on top of you, completely blocking any view you had of your ceiling and instead filling your viewline with just him. He leans down and kisses you, humming contentedly when you eagerly kiss back. Your hands find purchase on his shoulders as he uses one hand to tug your legs open so he can slot himself between them. 
You cry out when he presses himself against your core. He’s wearing nothing but his jeans but you can feel the heat radiating through the thick material. 
“Shit, look at that,” he whispers, leaning back on his heels to admire the nice little wet patch that has stained your panties, “You already this wet, baby?”
“Kissin’ you always makes me this wet, Si,” you sweetly confess and oh, you are just so precious. 
His hands slide up your stomach, moving your t-shirt up and up until it sits crumpled under your chin. Your tits are bare and move with every gasping breath that you take. 
Simon’s hands are just as rough and warm as you’d expect them to be. His thumbs come up and glide over your nipples until they harden into stiff little peaks for him. 
Then his mouth is wrapping around one, swirling his tongue around it before pulling off with a lewd pop. His hand pinches the other nipple, rolling it between his fingers as he listens to you whimper and sigh. 
“Please, Si,” you whine, “I-It hurts, please.”
“It hurts?” he hums, leaving a fleeting kiss against the nipple his tongue was torturing just a moment ago, “Where? Hm?”
His hand travels down your body, cupping your cunt through your panties. You gasp, arching your hips just a bit to grind against his palm. He lets you, before he meanly pins your hips down with his other hand. 
“Where, love?” he smooths the pad of his thumb over the seam of your cunt through your panties. The fabric is saturated with your slick, letting him see every part of you through shape alone. His thumb finds your clit, the little bud poking out through the fabric from how hard and swollen it's become, “Here? ‘S it your pretty clit that hurts, love?”
You nod, eyes rolling back in your head when he presses his thumb against the bud, trapping it under his finger so he can roll mean little circles over it. You’d be mindlessly rutting your hips by now if he didn’t have his other arm slung over your hips to keep you pinned nice and still like he wants. 
It already feels so different than when you touched yourself. Maybe because it’s him or maybe because he’s so experienced. 
That thought makes you equal parts jealous and equal parts turned on. He’d slept with plenty of people but now he was using that expertise to make you feel good. 
“Can you take them off, please?” you whine, pitchy and sweet from arousal. 
“Asked so sweetly for me,” he coos, hitching his thumbs into the band of your panties before giving them a firm tug. 
You quickly lift your hips, letting him tug them down and off of your feet. You expect him to toss them away but instead he holds them up, thumbing over the slickness in the crotch. You watch him with wide eyes as he analyzes it. Your  breath hitches when he suddenly brings them towards his face and licks a wide stripe of the fabric, moaning when he gets a good laste of your syrupy sweet slick.
“Simon!” you gasp – admonish, leaning up to snatch them out of his grasp. 
His eyes open, he hadn’t even realized he’d closed them, to look at you. He licks his lips like a dog licking its chops when it tastes something real delicious. 
He doesn’t even comment on what he just did or the pure embarrassment that is written all over your face. Instead, he grips underneath your knees and yanks you down the bed towards him so your hips are situated in his lap. 
“Jus’ let me touch you, love,” he whispers, “I’ll work a nice little orgasm out of you in no time, yeah?”
You nod your head because you trust him. You know he’s going to be able to give you what you need so badly. You don’t even question it – especially when you feel how good it feels when he uses his thumbs to spread your folds open for him. He groans when he sees the sticky strings of slick that display just how turned on you are. 
Pretty little hole clenching sporadically around nothing, dribbling more creamy arousal that makes his tongue feel like lead in his mouth. A pretty clit that twitches and throbs under his scrutinizing gaze. But you make no move to cover yourself and hide from his gaze. 
He finally touches the bud directly and it’s like electricity strikes through you. You lose control of your body as your back arches and your thighs violently twitch. Your cheeks burn when you hear him chuckle softly at your reaction.
“Sensitive,” he huffs, a crooked little grin on his face as he brushes his thumb over your clit again, garnering the same reaction as before from you, “Fuck, can’t believe you’re this sensitive and can’t make yourself cum.”
“‘S cause it’s you, Si,” you sweetly confess.
And it’s true. Having him touch you like this directly – feeling his callused skin over the most sensitive little part of you is euphoric. It doesn’t feel anything like when you touch yourself at all. It feels magnified, you feel like a live wire and everything feels like too much. But you don’t do anything to impede him because you trust him more than anything – especially like this, with your body. 
He replaced his thumb with his middle finger, prodding at your entrance. You almost think he’s going to press inside you but he doesn’t – instead, he gathers your slick up on his finger and drags it up to your clit. He softly circles the bud, cock kicking against his thigh when you sigh and croon so sweetly for him. 
Your cunt makes sticky noises as he continues doing this, gathering your arousal and lathering your precious bud up with it so he can so softly play with it. His touches aren’t enough to actually work you to the edge, it’s much too slow and soft but it feels good. He waits for you to relax against the bed, lashes fluttering as you whimper and twitch on the bed for him.
“There you go, sweetheart,” he whispers, leaning forward to press a kiss against your trembling thigh, “Relax f’me. Want you nice and soft for me so I can get my fingers in this tight little cunt.”
You gasp at that, partly in excitement and also in apprehension. You’ve never actually put anything inside yourself before – except once, you put your finger in and it burned so you never tried it again. 
“D-Dont…” you find yourself muttering, making him freeze. He thinks you’ve changed your mind, anxiety getting the better of you and he’s fully prepared to propel himself away from you at a moment's notice, “Be gentle, okay?”
His gaze softens when he looks at you, “Won’t hurt you, love. I promise.”
You remain relaxed for him when he carefully prods you with his middle finger. He keeps his thumb pressed against your clit, not rubbing it or anything, just keeping a nice pressure that keeps you sagged against the pillows. 
It doesn’t feel anything like when you tried that one time with yourself. Everything is so much wetter and more pliant. It’s like your walls just suck the digit in, even though it’s so much bigger than your own finger. 
You sigh softly when you finally have something to clench around. Simon gives you a sweet kiss to the spot right underneath your belly button in silent praise. He keeps his lidded, brown eyes on your face, watching every little expression you make with rapt attention. 
He slowly and carefully fucks his middle finger into you, feeling the way you slowly relax around him, soaking his skin with your arousal. He smooths his free hand up the length of your body, abandoning your clit to wrap his palm around your breast. You place your own hand over his, encouraging him to squeeze harder. 
“How’s that feel, love?” he asks, still sliding his finger in and out of you.
“Okay…” you reply, keeping your hand over his on your chest, “But it…um…”
“What?” he urges, “Tell me what you feel.”
“I-It feels nice but…” you trail off and he hums, nodding his head.
“Doesn’t feel good?” he finishes for you. You nod your head and he laughs softly, “I know, baby. Jus’ tryin’ to get you used to the feeling and then I’ll make it feel real good, alright?”
“Okay,” you whisper but he can tell you’re not too convinced that it’s going to feel much better.
You’re worried that the same thing is going to happen – it’ll feel really good and then you’re never going to be able to climb over that wall. You hate to imagine disappointing him, failing to get off. You’d hate for him to put all this work in and you just can’t cum in the end. 
“Hey,” he coos, “Get out of your head, pretty. Don’t worry about a thing, alright?”
You take a deep breath and slowly let it out, allowing yourself to relax against the bed again. Simon waits for you to be nice and pliant around his finger before he starts to fit his ring finger alongside it. He catches sight of the furrow in your brow when he stretches you around two of his fingers. It burns but when Simon brings his thumb back to your clit, tapping against the bud, it vanishes. Your thighs twitch and you whimper, walls clenching in time with the little taps until the burning vanishes completely.
“There we are,” he praises, “Knew you could do it, sweetheart.”
“A-Are you gonna add another?” you find yourself asking.
“Later,” he responds, scissoring the two fingers he has snug inside your cunt, “‘M a big man, love. Gonna need you nice and stretched for me.”
You whimper at that, walls clenching around his fingers as he slowly begins to fuck them in and out of you. Your cheeks burn when you hear the loud, squishing noises your hole makes every time he stuffs them back inside. 
After a moment of just getting you used to being stretched on two of his thick digits, he suddenly crooks them up and hits something inside you that makes your back arch. It causes a tingling feeling that you’ve never experienced to heat your tummy every time he touches it.
“Simon!” you squeal, trying to clench your thighs closed but his broad shoulders keep them open, “Th-That feels-!”
“I know, baby,” he coos cockily, grinding his fingertips against that little spot that makes you so gooey and creamy around his fingers, “Feels real good right there, I know.”
Your back arches and your jaw drops. You can’t do anything but moan and cry out as he fucks against that spot. He’s urged on by your sounds of pure pleasure, eyes flicking between where he’s got your pretty cunt spread open and the euphoric expressions you can’t do anything to hide.
It’s so precious, seeing you so open and loud for him. You don’t do anything to hide your sounds of pleasure nor do you even think of faking any of them for his sake. Every little thing you’re feeling, you express, and you can’t help yourself because it’s all so new and so much.
That hot, tingling feeling in your core only intensifies with every experienced stroke of his fingers. Your eyes are rolling back every time he touches that magnificent spot inside you, abusing it with his fingers until your walls are soft and malleable for him again.
And then he brings his index finger into it. He’s even more slow and careful as he fits it in beside the other two fingers. It doesn’t burn like when he had given you his second finger but it’s a certain stretch that simply feels strange. 
He gets you stuffed open on his three fingers, up to the third knuckle. You’re spread so wide and squeeze his fingers so tight that it makes him moan when he thinks about what it will feel like around his cock. 
If you’re this tight around just his fingers then you’re going to feel positively euphoric around him. 
“Simon…” you coo, reaching down to card your fingers through his hair. 
He grunts in acknowledgement, but is unwilling to part his gaze from the sight of the creamy mess you’ve begun to leave on his fingers. Your pretty clit is twitching and so swollen, glistening from your juices and he suddenly has the inescapable desire to wrap his mouth around it. 
You’re not even looking when he decides to do it. It’s like he can’t stop himself. 
All you feel is something wet and hot wrap around the little bud. You practically wail at the feeling of his tongue sliding against it. Your feet kick aimlessly, hitting his back and shoulders as you flail beneath his body. 
You sob his name, yanking harshly on his hair in a way that hurts but he’s not going to stop you. He knows it’s mean to do this, not even warning you or easing you into the feeling before he’s suckling your clit. His tongue slips in circles around it, flicking it with the tip of his tongue. His ears practically ring from how loud you’re crying out for him. 
His three fingers remain buried inside you but he’s hardly able to move them from how tight you’re squeezing them. All he can do is grind his fingers against your g-spot but it only makes your pretty body more twitchy and makes you squirm even more beneath him. He has to hold you down so you can’t get away. 
He doesn’t want your precious pussy to be ripped away from him, your juices are making his taste buds tingle – you taste so damn good. 
That familiar heat begins to grow in your core – one you’ve experienced many times before by yourself. You cry and wail for him, sobbing his name and gripping his hair. 
“S-Si, don’t stop, please, please, please–” you choke on your own cries, slamming your head into the pillows as your back arches painfully hard. 
He grunts lowly, blonde lashes fluttering as he watches your body’s pure, unfiltered reactions to this pleasure. He knows you’re getting close, can feel you clenching around him and your clit pulsing on his tongue in time with your heartbeat. 
You feel yourself reaching that wall, the one you can never overcome. But it feels different this time, the pleasure isn’t slowing. It’s not fading like it always does when you’ve got your own fingers on your bud. 
It always seems to slip out of your grasp by this point.
This is it, you think. You’re going to cum. You’re finally going to fucking cum. 
Then everything stops.
His tongue is gone from your clit and his fingers are nowhere to be found. Simon’s shoulders rise and fall as he watches your face flicker through a range of emotions before your eyes fill with tears and you look at him – utterly pitiful and hopeless.
“Wh-Why…” you finally whisper, tongue feeling heavy in your mouth. 
Your cunt pulses and throbs around nothing, the heat of your orgasm quickly dissipating, leaving that horribly empty and unsatisfying feeling in its wake. 
“Sorry, baby,” he coos, genuine and soft as he leans up to kiss your face, “That was mean, huh? ‘M sorry. Jus’ want you to have your first orgasm on a cock, love.”
That doesn’t do anything to quell your disappointment but you nod anyway, wiping away some stray tears that trickle from your eyes. 
“Please,” you breathlessly whisper, “Please, Simon. Want your cock, please. I-I was so close. It felt so good,” you start babbling, eyes falling to the hard outline of his cock in his jeans, “I wanna cum so bad, Si. Y-You promised. Please, just give me your cock. Please? Please? Simon!”
Simon’s mouth goes dry as he hears your babbled begging. Fuck, you’re absolutely aching for it. All you can think about is cumming. He never thought he’d get to hear you beg for him like this, so pathetically. You should be embarrassed, begging for cock like this when you’ve only just now gotten your first taste of being stretched open. Yet here you are fuckin’ crying for it.
His cock drools pre down his thigh, he can feel how wet his boxers have become from how much he’s leaking it. He’s aching in his jeans – he can’t pretend he doesn’t want it just as badly as you do.
“Shit, alright!” he snarls, wrapping a hand around your throat to force you to look at him. You gasp at the rough treatment, “Jus’ shut up and I’ll give it to you, yeah?”
You obediently nod your head, still staring up at him with those wide, teary eyes. He tries to act like his hands aren’t fucking trembling when he yanks his belt off. He doesn’t think he’s ever felt this needy – this excited to get his cock inside a pussy. 
But it’s you. You’re special. 
He loves you. This isn’t like the one night stands and hookups he’s had in the past. This is different. 
He feels like a fumbling teenager the way he clumsily yanks his belt out of the loops and shoves his jeans down his thighs along with his underwear. His cock, big and heavy, hangs under its own weight – it never slaps up against his stomach. He wasn’t just chatting shit when he said he was a big guy. 
He wrapped his hand around himself, giving it a few, firm tugs. He feels your eyes on him, watching the way he touches himself and it sends heat through him. He scoots closer to you again, pulling back his foreskin to show the fat, leaky head that he meanly taps against your clit. 
You gasp a cute little ‘ah!’ when he does that brings a smile to his face. He can’t say he’s the best lay for a virgin because he’s so big and he’s a brute – it’s in his nature. But he’s trying his best for you. 
“Alright, baby,” he coos, leaning on one forearm above your head, draping his big body over yours. He easily manhandles you into position, caging your knees against your chest and wrapping himself around you, “Just relax for me, hm? Can you do that f’me?”
You nod your head and shakily put your hands on his shoulders, cupping his jaw to bring him down to kiss you. He sighs into your lips, using his free hang to grip the base of his cock, prodding against your hole. You’re so slippery that it slides out of you and slips up your clit. You whimper at the feeling, thighs twitching at the stimulation. 
When he finally starts to press inside, your nails bite into his shoulders. It stings – it hurts. He’s so big, making your poor little cunt burn the deeper he presses himself. The head pops in and your hips jump at the feeling, his cock slipping back out. 
He huffs, dropping his forehead against your shoulder, “Fuck, sit still.”
“S-Sorry!” you whimper, “I’m sorry!”
“Shh,” he sighs, kissing your cheek, “‘S okay, baby. Hurts, huh?”
“A little,” you whimper, trying to downplay it so he won’t stop.
He hums and presses a kiss against the corner of your mouth. He knows that working an orgasm out of you before making you take his cock would be the nice thing to do but he’s selfish. He wants to feel your orgasm around his cock – where you deserve to have it. 
It’s your very first orgasm after all. It needs to be good and he knows he can make it real good once he can get you speared on his cock. 
So he grips himself again, sitting up for just a moment to lewdly spit on your pussy. It hits your clit and trickles down where he catches it with the head of his cock. He leans over your body and starts to push in again. This time he tucks his arms under your shoulders and pins you impossibly against him, leaving you with nowhere to run when he starts to press into you. 
You whimper, feet kicking against his back when he pushes deeper than before – past the head. He knows it hurts, you’re stretched beyond your limit and he waits with bated breath for you to say the word and tell him to stop. 
But you don’t. 
You just grapple your arms around his waist and dig your nails in. His skin is sweaty by now and it makes getting any purchase on him difficult. You let out a watery little whimper that has him freezing. You’re speared on half his cock when he finally looks at you. 
Your eyes are teary and they slowly drip down your cheeks.
“Do you want to stop?” he asks, brushing some away with his thumb.
You immediately shake your head, no hesitation, “No! K-Keep goin’, Si.”
“Don’t cry, pretty,” he shushes, keeping his grip under your shoulders and his hips pinned firmly against yours so you can’t squirm when he starts pressing in again. Your mouth opens in a silent gasp, eyes fluttering from the ache that settles where he’s stretching you wide, “‘S okay, just take a deep breath. ‘M almost in, love, you’re doin’ so fuckin’ good for me. Takin’ all of my cock so deep, just like you deserve. Hear me? This cock s’all yours now, yeah? Can have it whenever you need it.”
Your walls spasm around his cock as he talks, making him groan low in his chest. He’s almost there, can feel his balls starting to tap against you the deeper he gets until finally, his hips meet yours and you wail. 
He prods painfully against your cervix and he knows that it’s uncomfortable but he’s not willing to pull back just yet. He needs you to get used to being stretched and stuffed full of every inch of him. He takes care to do slow, gentle grinds, his pelvis catching your clit that eventually makes you relax. 
“That’s it,” he praises, “Just relax and let me make you feel good.”
He finally eases off of you, balancing his weight on his forearms on either side of your head, hovering over you. He slowly pulls his hips back, watching you slump against the bed when he finally stops pressing on your cervix. 
He finally starts fucking you, sliding his cock out just a bit before rolling his hips forward again. It's slow and soft, just testing the waters and getting you used to this new stimulation. 
It feels entirely different from his fingers. His cock is bigger, fills you so much more, touches deeper. 
His cock reaches spots deep inside you that his fingers didn’t even reach. But he’s permanently pressing against that spot his fingers were torturing. It feels so fucking good. 
Simon can see the way your eyes roll back as he carefully fucks you. Your first cock and you’re taking it so damn well. It makes him want to see how much more you can take but he knows he needs to ease you into it, he doesn't want to overwhelm you.
“Si…” you sigh softly, blinking as you struggle not to float off and become drunk with pleasure. 
“I know, pretty,” he coos, kissing your cheek before leaning back on his heels, fastening the thrusts of his hips. 
You can’t keep quiet now, mouth falling open to let out the most precious sounds of pure pleasure. You’re staring at him with wide eyes, like he’s hung the moon and stars in the sky just for you. His cock fucking throbs at the look of wonder that crosses your face. He knows you’re getting close, can feel how tight you’re clamping around him and he can see how much you’re creaming around him – making a mess at the base of his cock and in the thatch of curls there. 
“You gonna cum?” he coos, grinning when you shake your head, “Of course you are. I can fuckin’ feel it, baby. Know you got one for me, go ahead. Cum on my cock real nice, c’mon.”
“C-Can’t,” you whimper. It’s too much. You’re so wet. It’s fucking messy but you feel yourself at that damn wall, hanging on a thread and waiting for euphoria to come but it doesn’t, “Please! Simon! Please, I-I can’t! Please, please, please…”
“Fuck,” his hisses when he hears you begging to cum on his cock, “Come on then, baby. You can do it. Just let it go, let me fuck it outta you.”
You toss your head back into the pillows as a sob is ripped from your chest. As if he can sense how much you’re struggling, he brings his thumb down to press against your clit. Your eyes fucking roll, only the whites of them visible. You clench down around him like a vice and it only takes a couple little swipes of his thumb for you to tumble over the edge. 
It feels unlike anything you could have ever imagined. Pleasure soars through you and your hearing cuts out. It feels like you lose control of your body, unable to do anything but thrash and twitch as he fucks you through it. You’re not sure if you would prefer him to stop or keep going because it’s all so fucking much that it hurts. 
You’re gushing around him, drenching his cock in sticky, creamy cum that drips in thick strings down his balls. Holy fuck.
It feels like hours that you’re speared on his cock, cumming and cumming before it finally leaves you and you collapse against the bed. You’re still twitching, entire body shivering until he finally slows his thrusts to soft little rolls of his hips. He takes his thumb off of your clit and you’re thankful because it was starting to become unpleasant. 
You swallow despite how dry your mouth is, eyes finally focusing on him. His brows are furrowed and his bottom lip is tucked into his mouth. Pretty, brown eyes are locked on you and you suddenly feel shy. 
Had he been watching you the whole time? You hoped you didn’t make any ugly faces or embarrassing noises. 
“Fuck,” he coos, seemingly sensing your shame, “That was a fuckin’ orgasm, love.”
You’re panting, you realize. And you’re tired. You’ve never felt more relaxed in your life. 
All you can think is that you’ve been missing out on that your whole life? Now you’re not sure you’ll be able to even live without it ever again. 
Simon’s hands cup under your knees and pin them to your chest. You gasp as he bends you as he sees fit. You’re limp, so completely drunk on the pleasure you just experienced that you simply let him. 
But you realize he’s even deeper like this – and it doesn’t hurt like it did before. He’s pressing against your back wall and it actually feels good. You feel so sensitive inside, like you can feel every twitch of his cock. 
He’s still languidly dragging his cock in and out of you. It’s a fucking mess between your legs, you’ve cum so fucking much that it’s everywhere. He’s never been covered like this before and it’s fucking hot. 
Your cum sticks between the two of you in little strings that break and reform every time his hips meet and leave yours. Your little clit is puffy and swollen from your orgasm and he wants to press his thumb against it again but he knows the poor little thing is much too sensitive still. 
Your legs flop uselessly as he fucks you, eases you past overstimulation until you’re sweetly cooing for him again. He takes that chance to fuck you properly again, intent on finding his own orgasm deep in your cunt. 
His heavy balls slap against your ass. He wants to cum. He plans to make himself cum like this, just using your pretty pussy. But then he sees your eyes widen again and your lips part almost curiously and his eyes narrow.
“You feel it again, huh, sweetheart?” he goads, shifting his weight on his knees so his hips are pressed even closer to yours. 
“C-Can’t,” you whisper, the same thing you had before. But it’s different now, “W-Won’t be able to, Si.”
“S that a challenge, love?” he teases, a crooked little smile on his face. You sleepily shake your head, “Hmm, I think I can fuck another one out of you. One orgasm won’t be enough, two is a good number for now. Until I train this little cunt to cum for me all night long.”
You whimper, reaching out the claw at his forearms where he pins your knees to your chest. You’re held so uselessly open, cunt completely vulnerable to his fat cock stuffing you full. His pelvis hits your clit in a way that makes the little bud tingle and your cunt clenches pathetically around him with every thrust he gives you. 
Sweet little ‘ah, ah, ah’s’ are punched from your lungs every time he sinks completely inside. He’s gripping your knees harshly, squeezing where he has a grip as his own orgasm starts to creep up on him but he’s going to give you another orgasm. He has to make you cum again, to see you lost in pleasure like that once more. He knows that will push him over the edge, give him what he needs. He wants to cum with you, fill you up while you’re in the throes of pure pleasure that only he has ever given you. 
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he gasps, fighting the feeling of his own eyes rolling back in favor of watching you. 
He loves the way you wear everything you feel on your face. From the looks of wonder when it feels really good to the little rolls of your eyes when he makes it hurt just a bit. It’s so cute. 
Makes him want to play around with that little part of you – be a little mean to you. 
“Cum,” he growls, fighting his own orgasm down, “Fuckin’ cum right now.”
“I can’t!” you wail, kicking against his hold on your knees, pressing down to spread you open even further. 
His hips slam against yours, loud slaps and slick noises of your gooey cunt filling his ears, “You can. You will. Cum, sweetheart. You better fuckin’ cum.”
But you shake your head. It’s so close, you can feel it. It’s creeping up on you and you want it so bad. You want to feel that pleasure again. But you’re not even sure you’re going to be able to cum again, it feels so much more sensitive than before. It’s too much. 
Simon bares his teeth, letting go of one of your legs to drift between your thighs. Your eyes widen, you think he’s going to rub it again – it’s so sensitive that you’re not sure you’ll be able to take it. 
But instead, he does something else.
You hear it before you feel it, a soft little slap followed by the feeling of being electrocuted. Simon watches you with lidded eyes to see how you react. Just like he expected, you wail and your body gives a mean twitch at the impact. 
So he does it again. 
And again. 
And again.
Not too hard, just enough for it to hurt a little bit. A sting against a terribly sensitive little bud. It’s mean – he’s mean. But he can’t fucking help it. 
He needs you to cum for him again.
“Cum,” he snarls, giving your clit another slap.
As if on command, it sends you over the edge. Your legs kick out and he has to abandon your clit to hold you down, pinning you harshly to the bed as he uses all his weight to fuck down into your spasming little cunt. You’re cumming so hard around him that you stop breathing. He hears the hitch of breath and doesn’t hear the exhale. All you do is lay there, cry for him and cum.
He finds his end just as violently, tossing his head back to moan into the room as cum erupts from his cock. His thrusts grow sloppy as he milks the orgasm out of himself, voice breaking as he whimpers from how fucking good it feels. 
Like no orgasm he’s ever experienced. It’s like he can’t stop cumming, filling you up so much that it oozes out from around his cock. 
You’re trembling underneath him when he finally comes down, tearfully gazing up at him with your mouth agape, struggling to catch your breath.
“N-No more,” you pathetically whimper, legs twitching from the aftershocks, “C-Can’t take anymore, Si.”
“Shh,” he shushes, letting your legs go so you can relax comfortably as he pulls his cock from your pussy.
It’s twitching and clenching sporadically, still coming down from your orgasm. It makes his cum drip out of your cunt, a mess that spreads to the already messy sheets. Your cum and his mix together to make a sticky, gooey mess that makes his mouth water. He wants to eat it up, stuff his tongue into your tight little hole and swallow it all down. 
But he can’t. Maybe next time, he vows.
His cock gives a valiant kick at the thought of getting to do this again. He sits on his heels, gazing at his messy cock as if softens. He feels dazed, almost drunk. 
Then he hears the softest little sniffle from you and his eyes snap up to your face to find your crumpled expression and tears falling down your face. You cover your face with your hands and earnestly begin to cry.
“Hey, it’s alright, love,” he coos, laying beside you to tuck you into his chest.
“I-I don’t know why I’m crying,” you sob, wrapping your arms around his waist as you cry into him. 
“It happens,” he assures, “It was a lot and you’re just a little overwhelmed s’all. Just let it out, baby.”
And you do, weakly sobbing into his chest until it feels like you can’t cry anymore. He holds you through it all, rubbing your back and cooing sweet nothings in your ear until you grow silent. 
“Alright, love?” he asks.
“S-Sorry, Si,” you sniffle, finally pulling out of the spot in his arms you were hiding in, “I-I don’t want you to think I didn’t want it or that it was bad. I just…”
He gives you a soft smile, leaning forward to kiss you. It’s short and sweet, “I don’t think that. Like I said, it happens. Sometimes people just cry after sex, nothin’ to worry about.”
“Are you sure?” you sniffle, wiping your cheeks dry when the tears finally stop.
“Positive,” he sits up, “Let’s get cleaned up, alright? We need to change the damn sheets, fuckin’ hell.”
You giggle as you look down at the sheets where a very visible dark spot is sitting where you once laid. You don’t even have time to be embarrassed before he’s swooping you off of the bed and escorting you to the bathroom.
It’s too small for both of you to fit but you make it work. He wipes you down with a warm cloth before hopping into the shower to rinse and clean himself before he gets out and lets you do the same. While you do that, he changes the bedding completely and replaces it with new sheets and blankets for the two of you to sleep in together. 
When you finally stumble into the bedroom, he wraps his arms around you and urges you onto the bed. You giggle as you flop onto the bed before he crawls in after you and covers the both of you up, wrapping himself around you until you’re tucked securely against him. 
“I take it you liked it?” he finally whispers.
You shyly nod, “I-It was um…fun.”
“Felt real good, huh?” he teases, grinning wolfishly when you whimper.
“Y-Yeah,” you whisper, “It felt really good. I already want to do it again.”
Simon groans, hugging you tightly before shaking his head, “You’re gonna be insatiable. Gonna give my cock a run for its money.”
You giggle, affectionately petting his hair before he looks at you with the softest expression you’ve ever seen. It’s like his eyes are sparkling in the low light of the bedroom. He leans forward and ever so softly kisses your forehead, then your nose, before he reaches your lips. He pecks them softly, pulling back for just a second before he kisses you again. 
“I love you,” he whispers, so soft that you almost miss it. 
And your heart begins to race. You almost struggle to find the words to reciprocate. But when you do, he smiles and tucks you against him again, big arms wrapped around you like a bear hug.
It’s almost surreal. You can’t believe you’re here after everything – with him. 
Like you’ve dreamed your whole life, he loves you just like you love him. 
Tumblr media
PART ONE.
do not modify, translate, or repost
6K notes · View notes
cetoddle-archive · 2 years
Text
it's messy and a little too long but i got a synopsis figured out
1 note · View note
kimpossibly · 27 days
Text
little spencer reid drabble to get me out of a multi-month writing slump!!
warnings/tags: spencer reid x reader, established/secret relationship, swearing, r uses she/her pronouns
summary: after a situation out in the field leaves y/n temporarily blind, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep a secret.
Tumblr media
"Here she is!"
Y/N could practically feel the hush that fell over the room as JJ wheeled her into the office. The thick bandage covering both eyes ensured that she couldn't very well see it. She did her best to give her most realistic Y/N smile to put them at ease. "Are you guys happy to see me or what? You're gonna have to tell me, cause if you didn't notice, I can't really see..."
She heard a few relieved laughs (thank god) and a mutter of "smartass" from Morgan. Suddenly she felt the comforting presence of Penelope beside her as she took one of her hands. "Can I hug you? I just wanna hug you."
Y/N laughed. "You can hug me, Garcia."
With only a little effort, Y/N stood from her wheelchair. Almost instantly she was engulfed by a classic Garcia hug—it was a little less frantic and intense than usual, but that, she assumed, was attributed to her current state of blindness.
Garcia pulled away and there was a moment of tense silence before her Disney princess-like voice asked, "Are you...is it permanent?"
"No," Y/N said with a shake of her head. "The surgery went really well and this is just the standard recovery process. I have weekly check-ups, but other than that, these bandages need to stay for at least a month."
"A month?" Derek repeated from somewhere on her left. "We're not gonna have you in the field for a month?"
"Oh relax, Derek. I'm sure you'll find somebody else to beat in arm wrestling for a bit."
There was a bit of uneasy laughter at that, but the reality was a bit too disheartening for anyone to really be genuine about it. Y/N hadn't taken more than a week off in her time with the BAU, and that was only due to an emergency. She'd be gone for longer than she'd ever been—and without her sight, no less.
"But who's going to take care of you?" Garcia said, sounding a bit like a worried grandmother. "You can't be alone at home all...blind! Do you have someone who can stay with you?"
Before Y/N can answer, Spencer's voice came from somewhere on her right. "I am."
There was another hush, and this time Y/N was almost glad that she couldn't see everyone's faces. She could hear her heart hammering in her chest. JJ was the first to speak following the announcement of this information. "Spence?"
"What? Her grandma can't make it into town and I've done extensive reading on the recovery process for this—"
"But you're just going to go back and forth between your apartment and hers for a month? Isn't that, like, an hour long drive?"
Spence didn't have a quick answer for that, so Y/N finally forced out the truth. "We live together."
Once again, silence. Emily spoke first. "What? Since when?"
"Three months and fourteen days ago," Spencer said. "But we've been together for seven months and eight days."
Now all Y/N could do was plaster on an innocent smile as she stared (hopefully) into space. "Surpriiiiiiiiise."
Then came the uproar. Penelope and JJ shouted questions at the same time, Rossi seemingly swore in Italian, Morgan muttered some kind of threat towards the both of them. Y/N found her head darting left and right as she tried to find some particular sound to focus on. A comforting hand rested on her shoulders and she recognized it instantly as Spencer. She put her hand atop his and waited out the colossal wave of shock and awe from the rest of the team.
"Hey, hey!" Y/N shouted to get their attention. They quieted down and she pursed her lips. "Look, I know you've all been suspecting it anyway—we're just confirming your suspicions! Not that we have much of a choice..."
"Seven months? You kept this from us for seven months!" Garcia exclaimed—not mad, just surprised. Maybe a bit exasperated.
Spencer let out a little laugh. "Hotch knew!"
Y/N practically felt it as all heads turned to Hotch, who just shrugged. "They wanted to keep it a secret."
And then, of course, the screaming was directed at Hotch, who willingly took the brunt of it and began to guide the outraged hoard of co-workers in a different direction. Y/N heard their voices diminish as they followed him towards the other side of the office. She blew out a large breath, laughing in relief. She let her head fall to her hands, running her fingers through her hair. “Should’ve expected that kind of reaction.”
“Why are they so surprised?” Spencer said. She could practically picture the confused knot between his brows. “Garcia and Morgan already had a bet that we were dating.”
“I think it was the whole ‘we’ve been living together for three months’ thing that really got them.”
“Hm. Possibly.”
Y/N looked over her shoulder, tilting her head back in the general direction of where Spencer stood. “Make me a coffee? I would do it myself, but, you know, I can’t see.”
She heard him laugh quietly and felt a little flutter in her stomach. She always felt that way when she made him laugh.
“How long are you going to use that excuse?” he said, already pushing her chair in the direction of the coffee station.
“As long as it applies,” she replied. “Or until I become Matt Murdock and have superhuman coffee-making abilities.”
“Matt Murdock has radar senses.”
“Still probably allows him to make his own coffee.”
They came to a stop and she heard Spencer shuffling around to make coffee.
“Hey,” she said, blindly stretching a hand out.
Within a second, Spencer’s hand found hers. “What do you need?”
She removed her hand away from his, searching all the way up his arm until she found his tie, pulling him in closer. Within an instant her lips caught his in a slightly off-kilter manner—she kissed the corner of his mouth, really. He adjusted quickly despite his surprise at the sudden action. His instincts told him to pull away, to reduce any risk that anyone saw, but there was nothing to hide anymore. So he kissed her back for a brief moment before breaking apart, a small smile on his face.
“What was that for?” he asked, their faces still inches apart.
Y/N just shrugged, a smile on her lips. “I just realized I could do that. So I did.”
He nodded. “Got it.”
She released his tie and let him get back to making coffee, not needing her sight to see the smile on his face.
674 notes · View notes
cartierre · 1 year
Text
BRUTAL OUT HERE | op81
Tumblr media
SOCIAL MEDIA!AU oscar piastri x fem!singer!reader (fc: olivia rodrigo)
side note: the way i used to dislike oscar and now i'm so immensely proud of what he's achieved is crazy. what a character arc of me.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by conangray, oscarpiastri, sabrinacarpenter and 238,495 others
yourusername i am beyond the moon happy and proud to announce that my debut album is out now in store and on all music platforms! having worked on this for so long, it feels like seeing my little child grow up 🫶🏻 my team and i invested a lot of time and effort into this and i'm insanely excited for you to experience it. let me hear your thoughts and opinion on this! 💜
view all 7,293 comments
user1 JUST LISTENED TO IT AND I AM NOT OKAY
user2 the way this captures the spirit of being a teenage girl so well ⤷ user3 she literally took my feelings and put it into words it's incredible
conangray i'm so proud of my babygirl comment liked by yourusername ⤷ yourusername ah stop! you helped me so much in the process, huge huge thank you for supporting me 🫶🏻😭 ⤷ user4 i love y/n's and conan's friendship so so much!
oscarpiastri 💜🖤 ⤷ user5 OSCAR?
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by conangray, landonorris, oscarpiastri and 201,394 others
tagged: conangray
yourusername the last few weeks have been absolutely crazy! i've recieved so much love and positive feedback for 'SOUR' ... i can't even describe how loved and appreciated i feel. i love you guys so much!
view all 6,283 comments
user6 you deserve this so much!! your music makes me feel so many emotions, it's incredible
user7 can't believe how far you've come! been listening to your solos for so long and now you have a whole album aaahh ⤷ user8 remember when she used to upload covers on youtube?
oscarpiastri insanely proud! comment liked by yourusername
user9 oscar is being a bit suspicious these days i don't trust him ⤷ user10 lando is also liking sooo something is brewing in the paddock for sure
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by conangray, madisonbeer, oscarpiastri and 302,183 others
yourusername my first performance here in melbourne (my hometown) felt so fucking special i'm in tears from how amazing you guys were! my official tour dates are coming soon!
view all 8,283 comments
user11 is it true that you and oscar are childhood friends ⤷ user12 what if they're dating ⤷ user13 what if sour is actually about him?
conangray ahhh i'm so proud of my bestie! comment liked by yourusername ⤷ yourusername couldn't have done it without your pep talk
user14 someone said sour is about oscar and y/n's former relationship? ⤷ user15 is this confirmed?
oscarpiastri what an amazing show 💜 comment liked by yourusername
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, sabrinacarpenter and 328,283 others
tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris
yourusername cat's out of the bag thanks to this dingus
view all 8,094 comments
user16 no because it's kinda sweet they revealed their relationship during oscar's homerace (even if it was accidental) ⤷ user17 and her having had her first concert a week ago in melbourne as well (which he attended) like since when is melbourne so romantic like that
oscarpiastri i already told you i'm really really sorry ⤷ yourusername save your apology and gimme a kiss
landonorris great so now i see your annoying asses in real life AND on social media ⤷ yourusername haters gonna hate
user18 but... i wanna know who the album is about then ⤷ user19 real like babes let us knoooowwww
user20 i love childhood friends to lovers aaahh comment liked by yourusername
2K notes · View notes
kyuuppi · 1 year
Text
Genshin men Instagram HCs
Ft. Xiao; Scaramouche; Zhongli; Childe; Alhaitham; Kaveh; Tighnari
(gender neutral reader but wears a dress in Scara & Zhongli's parts)
Tumblr media
Xiao // @ a1atus
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
Very rarely posts
Never pictures of himself, you’ll only see his face in tagged photos
If he does post, it’s probably a new album cover of a band he likes, a particularly good plate of almond tofu from his favorite café, or—if he’s in a particularly good mood—a cute stray cat that befriended him on the street
Never edits anything but still takes pretty decent photos because he understands basic composition rules
Never tags anything but will sometimes write simple captions like “new guitar”
His pfp has not changed since he made his account and its literally just the blandest selfie you’ve ever seen—but he’s effortlessly photogenic so even when he’s just staring at the camera with a blank expression he looks hot
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
Xiao will unintentionally do his loyal boyfriend duties and like all of your posts but he never actually leaves a comment unless you specifically ask him to but you have to tell him what to say or else you’ll just get something like “your hair is nice” LOL
Maybe makes one post related to you but it doesn’t have your face—just picture of your hands holding each other or a photo he secretly took of you from behind as you admire some paintings from when he took you on an art gallery date
Still doesn’t write much in captions but if the post includes you, he always adds a little black heart emoji 🖤
Scaramouche // @ balladeer
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
Vehemently claims he’s not chronically online but he definitely is
Def has a dark / emo aesthetic profile and puts more effort into it than he’d ever admit
Uses stories pretty frequently
Usually to show off his game stats and victories or to vent about some annoying inconvenience that's just happened to him 
balladeer Jfc the train is late again I may as well just walk home everyday ffs
All his late night gaming photos are so highly saturated in his pitch black bedroom, the only source of light being his screen on max brightness and his violet RGB keyboard. If you raise the screen brightness on your phone you might be able to make out some empty Monster cans and ramen cups on his desk—he absolutely gives Discord / Reddit mod vibes 🤢
Definitely has a story archive just for Valorant 🤮
I wanna fuck him so bad it makes me look stupid—
Posts a few selfies to show a new piercing or the very rare occasion where he’s feeling really confident in his looks
unintentionally thirst traps the emo boy lovers; yes, I am talking about you and I—
Lightly edits photos or uses filters to make them look good but nothing extreme or super aesthetic, mostly just for decent contrast
Usually the first one to see any of his friends posts but never ‘likes’ them
Will leave snarky or sarcastic comments when the mood strikes tho
His pfp is a candid picture someone else took that he thinks he looks decent in—sticking his tongue out and giving double middle fingers to the camera
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
Makes a post or story for every date you guys have, even if it’s just a vague picture of your shoes together
He likes to show off that he has such an attractive s/o but also lowkey just wants to have a memory to look back on for the nights he feels lonely
Doesn’t post just you though, he’s always in frame holding you or touching you in some way—he feels the need to put some sort of claim cause he thinks people are gonna shoot their shot with you—he’s kinda paranoid and insecure, pls have patience w him
Likes and comments on all of your posts. Sometimes it's a snarky quip like if you post about you and your friends doing something funny he might comment “lmao ur so dumb” but if its a selfie or something you’re proud of, he leaves a little compliment and heart emoji.
YN0103 [bedroom mirror selfie of you shyly posing in a dress]
YN0103  Bought a new dress today…it’s not my usual style but I rlly like it 🥺
balladeer cute 💜
If anyone ever confronts him in person about his nice comments on your posts tho he’ll get flustered and claim his account was temporarily hacked LOL
His heart def flutters when you post a picture of him on your own account
He kinda can’t believe you’re proud enough of him to publicly post about him
Changes his pfp to the two of you together and, if you zoom in and squint, you can tell he’s kind of smiling <3
Zhongli // @ rex_lapis
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
I’m sorry but I have to do it…
He has Facebook grandpa vibes
Like he has no idea how to use half of the features; stories are an absolute mystery to him. What is a reel?
But he tries to be supportive of his friends and will leave way-too eloquent comments with a Wikipedia levels of supplemental information
a1atus [ photo of a shiny Fender acoustic guitar laying on what seems to be a bed]
a1atus new guitar
rex_lapis Lovely new instrument, Xiao. You seem to have quite good tastes – that particular model is popular among many professional musicians. It is well renowned for its clear sound and beautiful mahogany exterior. If you wouldn’t mind, I would love to hear you play it someday over tea.
a1atus @ rex_lapis thanks
the way I cackled writing that exchange ygweyufgwyu Xiaos just like ‘thanks for commenting dad’
His pfp is not him—it’s probably a famous painting he likes or a beautiful white flower from a garden he visited
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
If you want him to improve his Insta game, you’re going to have to teach him, I’m sorry
On the up side, Zhongli is a great student and is eager to learn anything you teach him
Will try to post pretty regularly; usually somewhat mediocre photos of beautiful scenery like sunsets and flowers
Like Scaramouche, he enjoys the idea of documentary your time together so he posts something at the end of each of your dates
Your heart lowkey melts when Zhongli, very earnestly, asks after dinner if you’ll allow him to take a selfie with you to post on his Instagram
Regularly asks for feedback on his posts to ensure he’s properly taking your advice and improving :,)
He even starts organizing and naming story archives on his profile—simple titles like “tea,” “nature,” “friends,” and “my dearest”
Likes and comments on every single one of your posts and replies to all of your stories, even if he was there with you
Usually just lathers you in compliments on your beauty or tastes but they’re so thoughtfully written that it’s obvious he’s not “just saying it” and genuinely believes all the kind things about you he writes
YN1231 [photo of you twirling in a summer dress amidst a colorful of bed of flowers in a botanical garden, take by your friend]
YN1231 It’s finally starting to feel like spring! 🌸🌼🌺
rex_lapis While the camelias are lovely, they pale in comparison to your radiance. Your yellow sundress is also quite lovely and compliments your complexion in the morning sunlight. Truly a divine sight. 
balladeer @ YN1231 @ rex_lapis ugh can you guys keep it in the DMs
- Changes his pfp to a selfie of himself smiling after you told him he should. The angle is a little odd but he’s so naturally attractive that he still manages to look good. 
Ajax // @ tartaglia_on_top 
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
Doesn’t post too often but when he does, it kinda gives stereotypical frat boy
Like, lots of parties and shirtless beach photos with his friends
The surprise is the occasional posts of his little siblings and kids he volunteers with in between
He sometimes posts championship and practice photos from his martial arts competitions with captions thanking his team and mentors
Is pretty popular—has a few thousand followers, many are people he met just once or twice at parties or genuine friends and classmates, but the vast majority are online fans who just follow cause he’s hot LOL
Is the type of person you followed once after meeting a long time ago and never talk to again but you can’t bring yourself to unfollow cause he’s nice and his updates are kinda interesting and he’s hot
Isn’t online that much so he doesn’t like/comment on his friends’ every post but usually tries to leave congratulatory messages when someone accomplishes something or graduates
His pfp is a closeup of himself with a boyish grin he cropped from a group photo
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
It is super obvious when you guys start dating cause almost every post from that point is about you in some way LOL
tartaglia_on_top [photo of Ajax, sweaty and exhausted but clearly excited as he holds a trophy in one hand with the other wrapped around your waist while he presses a kiss to your cheek]
tartaglia_on_top Officially a 3 year championship winner! Thanks to my biggest supporter @ YN0720 😘
He’s not even consciously trying to post you all the time, it just happens because you are either always together or any memorable moment he thinks are worth an Insta post involve you in some way
You’re the only person, aside from his family - that he actually likes/comments on all posts for
Is the type of boyfriend to leave those super dramatic, embarrassing comments on your selfies like “DAAAMN BABE 🥵 finna make me act UP” and, in one particularly shameless case, “god youre so hot pls step on me queen 😍” 
Please block him
He shamelessly liked all your past posts from before you too met as well—you were kinda mortified to wake up one morning to a notification that just said “what a lil cutie ❤️” on a post of yourself from seventh grade. 
Changes his pfp to a couple selfie he took of the two of you kissing on a winter vacation in the mountains
Kaveh // @ kaveh.designs
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
Obsessed with having an aesthetic profile
Like, the color palette of the background and clothing in his pfp selfie are carefully matched with the cover of each of his story archives, down to the hex code
He carefully edits every post and uses filters to make them all fit with his theme no matter how inaccurate to real life they may become
“Huh…I thought your bedroom wall was a bit more orange than this…” 
“Oh, that’s cause I use 30% Juno in all my bedroom photos for a warmer finish.”
“???”
Despite his aesthetic profile, he doesn’t come off as particularly vain or narcissistic—only posts selfies when he’s has a particularly good hair day or changed his accessories
Most of his posts are of places he travels to (museums and big cities with interesting architecture) or his own sketches and rendered design projects
Online pretty frequently, always checks insta when he wakes up, before bed, and during lunch breaks
His stories are often project updates, interesting things he encounters throughout the day, or food photos
Only likes posts he actually likes and sometimes comments with photography critiques
tighnar1 [photo of a cluster of three bright blue mushrooms clustered against vibrant green grass and patches of dark, wet soil]
tighnar1 Proof the forest is an amazing place: found this beautiful little cluster of juvenile Rakkhashava mushrooms on my hike today. Great spotting by @ colleeei. Check my story for some cool mushroom facts. 🍄
kaveh.designs great photo composition, Tigh, perfect golden ratio on the caps.
tighnar1 @ kaveh.designs Thanks I guess…
Has a decent number of followers, many of whom are also artists familiar with Kaveh’s reputation from the Kshahrewar. Others just like his OOTD stories and charming smile
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
Kaveh revamps his entire profile once you two become official
His pfp becomes a candid taken by a stranger of the two of you together at an aquarium, holding hands as you point something out to him through the glass
It was taken by a photographer working at the aquarium as part of a promotion—the photographer showed you two the photo and asked for permission to post it on their official website and Kaveh was absolutely obsessed with the photo—it’s still one of his favorite and it doesn’t even show your faces
He still matches his archived story covers to his new pfp but his actual feed had become a lot more relaxed and natural now
He still slightly edits photos so they look as good as possible, but he doesn’t like using filters on photos of you or the two of you together because he thinks it would be a disservice to your natural beauty
Like Ajax, his posts and stories naturally become mostly about you whether scenes from your dates—candid photos he takes of you where he insists you look like art even though you’re just in pajamas with an unmade face—or even photos of things he sees throughout the day that remind him of you
Sometimes he posts stories of funny reels or art pieces he knows you’d like and tags you in them with messages like “@YN0709 omg remember when we were talking abt this?” and “me & @ YN0709💕”
Similar to Childe, leaves the most downbad, dramatic comments on your posts
YN0709 [swimsuit selfie]
YN0709 happy summer! ☀️🌊
kaveh.designs Oh my god my heart– 💘 I cannot believe I get to come home to this every night 👅💦
YN0709 @ kaveh.designs omg kaveh pls 💀
al_haitham @ kaveh.designs Every time I see one of your comments I regret ever learning how to read.
Alhaitham // @ al_haitham  
★ ★ pre-relationship ★ ★
Only made an account so his friends would stop bothering him about not keeping up with things tbh
Checks his feed a few times a day but skips through stories if they’re too long/too many
Absolutely hates concert stories the most cause they’d loud, long, and filled with off-key drunken singing
Never likes or comments on anything unless it’s really interesting to him
Occasionally shares reels in his story that are like interesting history facts or official Akademiya announcements
Has a few posts (and only cause Kaveh would not shut up about it) but they’re mostly just pictures of book covers he’d just finished reading with a detailed review or literary analysis as the caption—but he’s mindful of avoiding spoilers for those who haven’t read it
However, he does have one post that stands out quite a bit
He posted an unintentional gym third trap because he just happened to be working out, as is routine, and thought it might be nice to share some tips on proper rope pushdown form 
If you’re not a gym babe and don’t know what this is, I beg of you, please look up a gif or video and imagine Alhaitham doing this, shirtless. You’re welcome.
It has become his most popular post by far
His pfp is probably taken straight from his faculty ID card: plain background, bright lighting, neutral facial expression
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
After you two have become official and are pretty comfortably established in your relationship, he’ll post a photo of the two of you—probably one you took - with a simple caption like “Late night at Puspa Café with my favorite person 💚”
Everyone who knows him freaks out in the comments with variations of “omg hathie got an s/o???” and “wow he finally posted a normal pic of himself, y/n is a good influence” but he doesn’t reply to any of them lmao
If you use Instagram a lot, he’ll naturally become more active too because he enjoys learning more about what you like through your posts and stories
He likes all of your posts but never comments—if one of your posts interests him, he’d prefer to wait until he sees you later to ask you about it in person 
He just wants an excuse to talk to you more
As he becomes more active, little bits and pieces of your relationship naturally infiltrate his feed
His latest book review post has your favorite mug in the background because the two of you had breakfast together
His informational story post of an antique Sumerian emerald he found at a street vendor is being modeled by your pretty hands because you were with him when he saw it and later given to you after the vendor insisted on Alhaitham gifting it to his “beautiful spouse”
He changes his profile picture to the two of you from one of your many reading dates, comfortably lounging on a loveseat in a quiet corner of the library—and this time, he’s softly smiling
Tighnari // @ t1ghnar1
Surprisingly active on social media
He thinks social media is a great way to share information about the importance of forest conservation and get people to appreciate the beauty of Avidya forest
Makes one post almost every day and multiple stories
Needless to say, 90% of his posts are of plants or small animals he finds on his hikes or while working
His most popular posts are those of cute squirrels and birds that are being nursed back to health after being found wounded—animals just seem to naturally love him so the pictures are usually taken by his coworkers because his arms are full with cuddly animals that refuse to move
The other 10% of his posts are from the occasional hang outs with friends or coworkers after work—snaps of iced fruit teas from Puspa café or colorful clay plates overflowing with Collei’s homemade pita pockets. 
He makes sure to reply to or at least like every comment, particularly those from people asking questions about the plants he posts or how to become a forest ranger. Even simple “wow that's so cool” comments often get at least a “thanks, glad you liked it” from Tighnari
He tends to use some cute forest or food emoji when they fit with his posts. For example, 🍄,🥙,🦊,🐦, etc.
Also tends to use “:)” when replying to his followers because he knows it can be difficult to read tone in text-based communications
Tigh is basically a social media manager at this point oops
Because he is online so much, he naturally keeps up with almost everything his friends post and will like or comment on things he finds interesting
His pfp is a selfie of himself with a small yellow bird perched on his shoulder from one of his patrols
★ ★ in a relationship ★ ★
All Tighnaris written by me WILL follow the “fennec foxes mate for life” trope regardless of AU, it is an indisputable law of the universe
If you’re in a relationship with Tighnari, you should be prepared for stability and commitment in general
While he doesn’t go out of his way to make an official announcement post or anything like that, you become a regular feature on his page
Will tag you in anything you’re related to, unless you specifically ask him not to
t1ghnar1 [photo of a small, cream-colored fox brushing itself against Tighnari’s leg and looking up at the camera with large eyes]
t1ghnar1 On a walk with @ YN1229 this morning we spotted this cute little kit without her mom. 🦊 While adorable, foxes - even kits - are wild animals and should never be approached unless by professionals. We have informed the local animal control where she will be taken care of until we can locate her family. Photo by @ YN1229
He never outright announces you as his lover but he seems to spend so much time with you and refer to you so casually that his followers who don’t know him just assume you’re his spouse LOL
He doesn’t bother to correct them either :,)
bennie_boy Wow, that mountain is so high up - wasn’t ur spouse scared to go up there?
t1ghnar1 @ bennie_boy Y/n has been on so many trips like this with me that they’re pretty used to it. :)
Likes your posts as he see them on his feed and occasionally leaves a short comment like, “beautiful <3”
5K notes · View notes
Text
End Game 2
Tumblr media
No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn’t go exactly as planned.
Characters: Andy Barber
Note: we're here to boo Andrew.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.
I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖
Tumblr media
“So, you’re coming?” Jacob’s voice quavers with excitement. You can’t imagine how he’d sound if you said no. You hate letting people down, it seems to be all you've ever done.
“Uh, yeah,” you say as you steer around the track; opting for some MarioKart over Minecraft that night, “boss says it’s no problem to get the days off. Just have to make it up after. Is... Is everything still good on your end?” 
“Oh yeah, sure thing,” he assures buoyantly, “I can’t wait. Did you still wanna split the airBnB?” 
“Actually, I got a place to stay for the night then I’ll take the early bus back,” you explain as Princess Peach knocks you off the track, “argh!” 
“Right, that’s good,” he says, “good to know you won’t be stranded out there.” 
“Mhm,” you use your boost to catch up to Peach and get your revenge. You don’t mention that Kara will be with you at the con. You just want to be sure this isn’t something wonky. “It’ll be nice to get out of town. My grandma will probably be happy to have the place to herself.” 
“Yeah,” he scoffs, “what’s her problem anyway?” 
“Just the way she is. She likes her space,” you shrug, “I don’t know, I don’t think she expected to be raising her granddaughter...” 
“Ah, yeah, I guess that would be stressful,” he says, “still, seems like you’re not too bad to be around. Got a job, go to school, all that. Think my dad would love it if I put in half as much effort.” 
“Yeah? You make him sound like a hard ass.” 
“Can be. Lawyer, so kinda his schtick,” he chuckles. 
“Oo, fancy,” you snort. Maybe if either of your parents had been lawyers, you wouldn’t be living off your grandma’s resent.  
“I guess. Never really see him that much...” he grumbles. 
“Hm, well, no winning, is there?” You mutter. 
“Not really,” he sighs and hisses, “ugh, Toad!” 
You chuckle and cross the finish line. A respectable second. You wait for him to finish and stifle a yawn. 
“Tired?” He asks. 
“Little.” 
“Me too, long day,” he groans, “neck’s killing me.” 
“Oh, what’d you do--” 
“You know, I’m-- an idiot. Was messing around on my bike.” 
“Of course,” you snicker, “well, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna sign off. I don’t wanna keep my grandma up and my head’s starting to go.” 
“Sure, I gotta get up early anyway,” he sounds less than enthused. “Good night.” 
“You too.” 
“Tomorrow?” 
“Can’t, work. Day after?” 
“Okay, I’ll make it work,” he confirms, “I’m excited about meeting up. Aren’t you?” 
“Yep,” you try not to show your doubt. You’re still not really sure about everything. 
“Can’t wait,” he rasps and the silt in his tone makes you shiver. 
“Yeah, er, bye then,” you hit end session and take off your headset, your ears tender and a bit sweaty. Even if it is awkward, at least you’ll get to hang with Kara for a bit. You haven’t seen her since grad. 
🎮
You’re already exhausted and you’re not even inside yet. The line for the convention is bustling and your excitement keeps you going as you and Kara gab away and move with the slow crawl. The sun beams down and has you sweating, though you could easily blame that on your nerves too. 
“So, this Jacob... is he cute?” She winks. 
“Kara,” you roll your eyes, “it’s not like that. Really. We just game.” 
“Oh yeah. But do you want it to be more?” She teases. 
“You know I’m not really into all that. I don’t have room for a boyfriend in my life.” 
“So boring. Never change, girlie,” she nudges you playfully. “But really, that’s smart. Calvin is too much. I’m thinking of cutting him loose.” 
“Again?” You squint. 
“Not my fault he keeps coming back,” she giggles. 
You peer around, searching out a familiar face amid the ocean of strangers. You haven’t seen Jacob yet. You’re almost hoping he doesn’t show up. Then again, why wouldn’t he? He paid for you to be here. The reminder of the fact strikes guilt in your chest. 
You pause as your eyes catch another pair, further back in the queue. An older man with a beard. He stands out among the crowd. He wears a tidy button-up where most wear graphic tees or cosplay attire. He stares for a moment before he turns away and looks down, probably at whatever kid dragged him there. 
“Well, what are you going to do if he sees you and falls in love?” Kara asks. 
“Whatever,” you roll your eyes. 
“If he’s a nerd like you, how could he not?” 
“Hey,” you frown. 
“What? You’re like the sexy gamer girl type. Isn’t that what dudes want?” She shrugs. “Let me see his pic again. He’s a skinny little thing. He’d definitely be into you.” 
“Urgh, stop,” you cross your arms. 
“Sorry, I’m only playing. You just seem so nervous, I’m trying to loosen you up.” 
“I know,” you puff, “it’s just... I should’ve just said no. This is stupid. I don’t know why I even agreed.” 
“To get out of that shithole,” she snips. “Why do you think I hauled ass the minute I popped by grad cap on?” 
“Mm, yeah, I just hope... do you think he really wants that? Maybe I gave him the wrong idea. Oh, Kar, I really didn’t mean to lead him on.” 
“No, no, I’m sure it’s nothing you did if he does. I mean, he’s probably a virgin so...” 
“That’s mean,” you pout. 
“What, so are you,” she laughs. 
“Exactly,” you shake your head and drop your arms, a buzz jittering your skirt pocket.  
You look down at yourself as you slide your phone free. That was probably a bold choice but it’s so damn hot out. Besides, your Pikachu tee is loose enough to counteract the denim sheath. You turn the screen up, shading it with your hand as you read. 
‘Sorry, not going to make it. Something came up. 🙁' 
You frown and reread the message. Really? You came all the way here, took time off of work, and he’s flaking? 
“What’s up?” Kara asks as she clicks her manicured nails impatiently and stands on her toes, trying to see past the bodies ahead. 
“He just cancelled,” you mutter and type in your reply. 
‘Oh no. Hope it’s nothing bad. Maybe another time.’ 
You hit send and drop your shoulders. You’re surprised how disappointed you are. More so about the wasted effort than anything. Even if you are a bit relieved, it’s shitty. 
“Ah, bullshit!” Kara sneers, “what the hell? What did he say?” She reaches for your phone and you hold it out of her grasp. “That fucker.” 
“It’s probably not his fault. Shit happens.” 
“Babe, you’re gonna settle for a lot of nonsense if you keep that attitude. I’d be friggin pissed if I was you. He brings you all the way here and now he’s too good for you. I bet he saw some cute girl in line and she smiled at him once so now he’s ditching,” she scowls, “I hate boys.” 
“I’m sure... it’s nothing,” you say glumly as your phone vibes again. 
‘I’m real sorry. I hope you still have a good time. Take lots of pictures.’ 
You don’t respond. You lock your phone and put it back in your pocket. It never feels good to be stood up. Even then. 
“You know what, screw him,” Kara snarls, “let’s go in there and buy you the cutest plushie you can find. Hell, maybe you can find an even cuter guy.” 
“Kar,” you warn her. 
“Fine, just the plushie. Maybe two,” she trills, “forget that loser.” 
🎮
The chaos of the convention wipes away the dark cloud over you. You’re almost thankful that Jacob gave you the opportunity to catch up with Kara. You didn’t realise how much you missed her. It’s perfect day where you can forget about your grandmother and your lame job and everything else. 
You rush around from booth to booth. You look at fanart, handmade figures, and stuffies. You’re mindful of your wallet and how empty it really is. You’ll get one thing and a snack. That’s all you can afford.  
As the hours roll by, your early morning bus ride and time spent standing out in the hot sun catch up to you. You feel your muscles starting to ache and your eyelids turning fuzzy. You yawn as you shuffle behind Kara as she waits in line to get a signature from the one D-list celeb she’s heard of. You’d get one too but it’s way too expensive. 
“Hey,” you rub your cheek, “mind if I sit and wait? I wanna grab a soft pretzel anyway.” 
“Sure,” she agrees easily, “looks like it’s gonna be a while.” 
“Want me to bring you a drink or something?” You offer. 
“Nah, just text me where you are so I can find you,” she says. 
You leave her reluctantly. You’d rather not be wandering alone through the hordes but your feet are killing you and your stomach’s been roaring for the last hour. You stand in line for the pretzel stall and get yours with cinnamon sugar and syrup. Messy but delicious. 
You find a table in the corner and settle in. You put your phone beside the napkin and tear apart the doughy goodness. Your phone lights up with a notification from the merge game you like to play and you see several other icons; missed messages. 
You focus on your snack, savouring each bite, as your eyes drift around the crowded centre. You can barely see some of the booths as hordes cluster around. Some cosplayers bat at each other with toy swords as children fight over the arcade machines. You’re overwhelmed by the sheer amount of activity all around. 
You put your head down trying to block out the lights and noise. You feel yourself getting overstimulated. It’s like when you’re in the lecture hall and suddenly you can hear every sniff, sneeze, and keystroke. You close your eyes as you wipe your fingertips on the edge of the napkin, only half-finished your pretzel. 
“Looks good,” a deep voice cuts through the blaring din. 
As you recognise the timbre, your heart squeezes and the world pinpoints at the centre of your skull. You open your eyes and slowly raise your head. You blink dumbly at the unfamiliar man stood in front of you. You think you’ve seen him before, or at least he sticks out from the typical convention attendee. 
It isn’t that he’s too old, there’s lots of older geeks hanging around but they have neckbeards and greasy combovers. His hair is tidy and his beard trimmed close. His clothing also lacks the typical Dorito dust or anime character. You remember, he was outside in the line. 
“Uh, hello?” You utter. 
“Sorry I’m late,” he says as he pulls out the chair across from you. He sits as your insides plunge. You know his voice. 
“Jacob?” You murmur in shock. How? Why? This isn’t the stringy teenager you met online. 
He nods, his jaw tensing, and he crosses an arm over the table, pointing to your half-eaten pretzel, “what’d you get on yours? I can’t decide between sweet or savoury.” 
“Who... are you?” You croak, head spinning as your eyes prick. You knew something was weird. You knew you weren’t talking to Jacob or whoever that boy was in the pictures. 
He takes a breath and lets it out slowly. As his chest deflates, you do too. He’s older than you, bigger than you, and by the looks of him, a lot better off. Why the hell would he be chatting with you? Why would he lie to you? 
“You’re right. I’m not Jacob,” he confesses, the colour draining from his face. He steeples his fingers and considers his next words carefully. You sit back and hug yourself defensively. This is fucked. “My name is Andy, Jacob is my son.” 
“Your son?” You eke out, “why-- why would you lie?” 
He cringes and takes another breath, “he was my son,” he corrects himself, “he... passed.” 
You feel like you’ve been struck. Your mouth falls open, stunned. Not only did he hide behind his son’s photos, but his dead son’s. Oh, god. You feel sick. No, you feel stupid. 
“Look, please, just hear me out. I just—it wasn’t meant to go on this long. When I first lied to you, it was supposed to be that one time. I was... I was lost. I just lost Jacob and I was going through his things. I started playing because I missed him. I wanted to feel like he was still there--” 
“No, no, you got on discord and you started talking to me. As him!” Your voice shakes and your eyes tinge. “That’s not just missing him.” 
“I know, you’re right. I lied but... I got lonely playing by myself so yes, I went onto that discord. You were nice. You didn’t call me a noob or whatever. And... and after work, looking forward to hearing your voice, it got me through a lot of pain. Being alone in that house after so long, I couldn’t cope--” 
“So you lied to me?” You stand and snatch your phone, nauseous to the core, “you manipulated me. How do you know—if you had just been you that I would’ve been any different? If you just wanted to play games, to be friends--” 
“I was scared--” 
“I don’t care if you were scared,” you hiss as you stomp forward. “You’re an adult.” 
He stands and blocks your path. You recoil, put off by his height. He’s a lot bigger on his feet. 
“Please, move or... I’ll scream,” you breathe. 
“You don’t have to do that. Just hear me out,” he pleads. 
“I don’t want to hear anything else from you, Jacob. Or Andy. Or whoever you really are,” you sneer, “move.” 
He shudders and hangs his head. He makes himself seem small as his shoulders round and he backs out of your way. You bite down and march past him.  
You need to get to a bathroom. Now. You’re going to spew up your guts. More important, you need to get yourself together before you go find Kara. She can’t know this happened. It’s too embarrassing. 
275 notes · View notes
narrycherries · 11 days
Text
call it what you want✨pt.5
Tumblr media
..
masterlist // part 4
word count: 9.7k
warnings/tags: harry x reader, best friends to lovers, smut, oral, blowjob, fingering
Harry was carrying in the few groceries you bought before coming back to your house. He drove you home, since Stephanie had picked you up earlier. You both had a pretty good and believable excuse to not attend the after dinner celebration with everyone. Nobody questioned it, not even the fact Harry was driving you home. They didn’t care, and you were glad.
“Can you put that stuff up, please?” You asked with a sweet voice as you shut the door behind Harry and turned the lock.
He sat the bags on the countertop and gave you a glance. “Yeah, I got it.”
“M’gonna go use the bathroom and.. wash my face off.” You sat mid stretch, your body starting to ache from the long day you had.
“Meet you on the bed, darling.” He smiled back, making your cheeks flush a little.
You left him in the kitchen and made your way to the bathroom in the hallway. Your apartment was about the same size as his, but you had a roommate that shared the space with you. Harry lived alone, which made things a lot easier when it came to being with him privately. It’s not a regular thing for your roommate to be gone for the weekend, so you were taking advantage of it.
Harry put away the ice cream, grapes, and the other random assortment of items you bought, while you were washing your face free of makeup and taking care of your business. Once he was finished, he pulled off his shoes and cut off the kitchen light before heading to your bedroom. He always enjoyed staying with you because he thought your bed was way more comfortable than his. You had thick, fluffy pillows, a cozy comforter, and a few stuffed animals that embarrassed you, but he thought they were adorable.
He took his shirt off and laid it over the back of your vanity chair, along with his jeans. He knew he had a few clothing items here, so he went to the usual drawer they were in to find them. The bottom drawer of your dresser was the spot you kept his clothes in. You had way more clothes at his place than he did here, but you were over there more than he was here so it made sense. He grabbed a pair of pajama pants, the only pair actually, and slid them up his legs. You had gotten to where you didn’t want him to wear a shirt, for obvious reasons.. things had changed and you particularly enjoyed touching his bare skin while you slept.
You tossed the hand towel you used to wash your face into the hamper before stepping out of the bathroom. When you appeared in your bedroom door, Harry was facing away you from on the edge of the bed with his phone in his hand. You smiled to yourself and took the chance to be a little sneaky. He had no idea you were in the room, he didn’t even hear the bathroom door open when you came out. You ran towards him, the sound of your feet hitting the floor caught him off guard. He looked up just in time to see you leaping on to him.
“Boo!” You screamed as your arm flew around his neck and you tackled him onto the mattress.
He was laughing hard, sort of frightened by your sudden appearance. “Oh, that’s what we’re gonna do, hm?” He said while grabbing your waist.
He was much stronger than you, so it wasn’t a surprise when he overpowered you and rolled you onto your back. His fingers were rubbing against your skin under your shirt, tickling you like it was his only job. And it was a torturing act.
“Harry!” You squealed out, trying to fight him back.
He was enjoying your efforts of trying to push him over, so he let you take over. He fell onto his back on the bed and you quickly climbed on top of him. You were sitting on his thighs, your fingers grabbing and pinching his sides. He was laughing just as hard as you were, and it felt so freeing to be normal with him. All night you had wanted to just touch him like you always do when you're alone and finally you were able to.
Harry tried to take control again by reaching for your waist, but quickly grabbed his wrists and forced his arms down by his head, leaning down to be close to his face.
“Nope!”
He smirked. “You can’t hold me down forever, peach.”
“Says who?”
“Your arms are gonna get tired.” He chuckled back, admiring how pretty you looked with flushed cheeks and a big grin.
“You’re calling me weak? That’s so mean.” You faked an eye roll and a pout, which made him laugh a little more.
“Just being honest, honeybun.”
Hearing him say one of the more special and affectionate pet names made your heart skip a beat. He had avoided them most of the night, and you noticed. It was for obvious reasons, but it still sucked that you couldn’t hear the names you adored. He noticed how you were looking at him, and it was a familiar look.
He lifted a brow gently. “I’ll go easy on you.”
“Don’t need you to. M’gonna beat you.”
Harry’s chuckle made you grin, and it was motivation for you to overpower him. He started laughing again, shaking his head in disbelief. You leaned down to his face and pressed a gentle kiss onto his dimple. The corner of his mouth pulled upward to a smirk, making you blush. You lifted yourself back up, hands still gripping his wrists to keep him down.
“That’s not fair, y’know.” He said with a cock of his eyebrow.
“What’s not?”
His eyes were full of stars, and you realized it was the same look he had given you that very first time he kissed you. It was the exact way your eyes look whenever you’re admiring him.
“Teasing me.. could’ve given me a little more.”
You grinned, then rolled your eyes again. “You’re so greedy.”
“C’mon.. just give me one more.”
The thought of you being in control was intimidating, yet intriguing. You could do whatever you wanted, and you knew he’d support it. You let out a breathy laugh, amused by his fake pout and pleading eyes. Without saying a word, you lowered yourself again. This time, you moved more slowly. He huffed as you brushed his lips against his cheek, but didn’t touch his skin. He wanted your lips on his, and you knew that, but you were debating on giving in to him. It would be cruel to not give him what he wanted, because he would easily give you whatever you asked for. You smiled sweetly, then carefully placed your pouted lips onto his. He grunted, trying to part his lips to let his tongue come out, but you shook your head. You didn’t want to give away too much just yet.
“You’re so mean.” He muttered while you moved away from his mouth.
“You’ll be okay. You’re a big boy, you can take it.”
“You should let me go.” He said with a smile, his dimples sinking deep in his cheeks.
“And why should i?” You scoffed, trying to keep your guard up but it wasn’t working. He could tell you were wanting to do something more than this.
“Just trust me.”
“No.” You shook your head. “You’re gonna try to win and I’m not letting you.”
Harry smiled back, trying to get you to understand his intentions without saying anything directly. “C’mon, just for a minute? Promise I won’t tickle you.”
You snarled at him, thinking about what tricks he could be planning behind that sweet smile. “If you do.. I’m going to attack you.”
“I promise I won't.” He laughed through his words as you let up your hold on his wrists, not sure what he was wanting to do.
You let out a squeal as he swiftly sat up and locked an arm around your back to keep you in place. He grabbed your hips and moved your body up his legs so that you were sitting on his crotch, feeling his growing bulge beneath you. It wasn’t hard yet, but you could tell it was different than usual.
“Harry.” You nervously whispered as your hand held onto his nape for support. He wasn’t going to let you slip, and you knew that, but you were anxious.
“It’s been too long since I’ve really got to kiss you, darling.” He said in a low voice, his lips pressing into the corner of your mouth.
“Tryin’ to be sweet to me, hmm?” You said with a smile as you moved your other hand onto his neck, feeling his warm skin and strong pulse beating against your palm was comforting.
“Always, peach.”
“Why do you keep doing this to me?” You breathed out softly, closing your eyes as your forehead pressed onto his.
He chuckled a little, digging his fingertips into your waist. “What do you mean?”
You shook your head and moved so your mouth was next to his ear. Your hand shifted to his shoulder, and you held on to him for dear life. If you let go, you feared he’d disappear and this would all be a dream.
“You.. you keep making me want to.. to risk everything.”
He furrowed his brows a bit, even though you couldn’t see them. “Darling, I told you.. it’s fine. And.. and if you don’t want.. to do anything, just tell me and I’ll stop.”
You didn’t say anything, which caused him to start worrying. Did he take it too far too soon? You had only had two intimate moments, he didn’t consider the usual cuddling or the new occasional kissing to be too intense. He was afraid you’d hate him for doing this.
“I’m sorry. I’ll stop.” He finally huffed out as you stayed quiet.
You whined when he let you go, trying to silently tell you that you could move off his lap. “No, Harry.”
“Honey, you’re.. you’re confusing me a bit.” He reached up to grab your jaw and tilt your head back, not wanting to repeat the same conversation as before - but he had to make sure you were on board. “Do you wanna do things like this? Nothing.. nothing has to be at risk.”
You groaned, your nails gently scraping at his shoulder. “Of course I do.. you know that I do.”
He smiled when you gave him a pout. “Then trust me.. and trust yourself. If you want to.. then you’ll know.”
“I do.. I know I do.”
“Okay. Then.. don’t worry about it, alright? Everything is going to be alright.”
You took a deep breath and let your head fall back. You pushed it out along with a groan that made him chuckle and squeeze your waist on either side.
“This is so frustrating.”
“It doesn’t have to be that way.” He reminded you, again. “Just let loose with me.. It’s just us in here, nobody’s watching.”
Nothing left your mouth as you leaned forward, falling against his body. He was smirking as your other hand started trailing up his chest. You were slow and methodical with your movement, making sure you felt every groove, dip, and shape of his toned body
“Kiss me, please.” You whispered against his chin, wanting nothing more than to get lost in his mouth.
Without any more hesitation, he moved his mouth onto yours and started synching his lips with how yours moved. It was as magical as ever, and for some reason this felt even more special. You grunted gently as he gave your waist a hard squeeze, making sure your body was as close as it could get to his.
Harry wasn’t being shy with where his hands went, and you were perfectly okay with that. He was switching between gripping your hips and rubbing up and down your sides. Each time his hands would return to your hips, he’d push you down a little, trying to create a little friction.
“Harry.” You gasped suddenly, detaching your lips from his.
He looked at you with a bit of worry, not sure if he was going too far. He knew you could feel his hardening bulge. When you glanced down, he licked his lips and shook his head.
“Sorry.”
You frowned a little. “What?”
“Is.. is this too much?’
You hated seeing that look on his face - like he was ashamed or embarrassed about what he was doing. You put on a smile and grabbed either side of his face, pulling it to yours. Harry groaned into the kiss, surprised that you pushed your tongue that far into his mouth. When you tore away from him, you gasped and dug your hips harder into him.
“No, it’s fine.” You muttered back, shocked by the amount of friction it caused to your clit.
“Sure?”
“Yeah.. feels nice.” You said with blushing cheeks and a cute smile.
He chuckled back, helping you move your hips back and forth on top of him. “Yeah?”
“Mhm, are you okay with it?”
Harry let out a laugh and answered by pulling you back in for a sloppy kiss. It was amazing to experience this with him. You were getting bolts of pleasure shooting through your body as the right amount of pressure would cause a satisfying rub to your clit. Harry’s pajama pants were thin, and so were your panties. He could feel how wet you were getting, how warm you were - and it was driving him mad. If you had put on shorts instead of a big t-shirt, he wouldn’t have been able to notice it and maybe he wouldn’t be this affected. He didn’t mind, in fact he was quite excited about it. Would anything come from it? He wasn’t sure and he was okay if it didn’t, but at least the grinding would be a nice sensation for you both.
“Harry, please.” You mumbled out as you pulled away from his mouth, your fingers digging into his neck on either side.
“What is it, darling?”
“Please, I.. I want.. you to touch me.” Your words were soft as you tried to catch your breath.
He licked his lips. “Like last time?”
You nodded quickly. “Mhm, please.”
“Okay, sure. I’d love to.”
A grin covered your lips as you met his stare. “Pretty please.”
“Don’t have to beg me, darling.” His wink made your heart skip a beat. “Wanna lay down?”
“Mhm.”
He bit down on his cheek as you climbed off his lap and crawled away from him. He followed you, allowing you to get situated how you wanted of course. You ended up laying all the way down, your head on the pillow until his arm slid underneath you. It was just like last time. He was as close as he could get, and you adored that.
“Eager, hm?” He said with a chuckle as you grabbed his wrist and brought it onto your stomach.
“Something like that.” You muttered back as you turned your head towards him.
“Do you want the cover on you?”
“No, it’s too hot.”
You pulled your t-shirt up, bunching the fabric together just below your boobs. You weren’t comfortable just yet with being completely exposed to him, and he was okay with that. As long as you were content, he was fine with whatever you decided on.
“Hmm, that tickles.” You let out a gentle laugh while he was rubbing his hand in a circle over your stomach.
“I could just look at your tummy and you’d get ticklish, hm?” He pressed his lips on your temple.
“Hey, um.. can.. can you do it more than once time?” Your sudden question made him smirk.
“As many times as you want, darling.”
He wasted no time. Hesitation would only make you feel more nervous, and he didn’t want that. You took a deep breath as his hand moved between your parted legs. You lifted a knee up, letting your leg rest against his as he gave you a few gentle pats. Each one made you jolt a little. He was watching your face closely, making sure you were liking what he was doing.
“Already excited, hm?” He asked with a teasing chuckle as his fingers rubbed against the fabric of your panties - you were soaking through just a bit.
“Please.” You whisper softly as your hand moves to his forearm. You wanted to feel him, hold on to him to convince yourself this was real.
He drew his hand away for a moment, just to sit it over your navel. “Remember what I told you last time?”
You nod lightly. “I’m in charge.”
“Exactly.” He shifted his head so he could kiss your lips for just a moment. You wished it had been for longer. “You’re the boss, got it?”
“Got it.”
He pecked your cheek before sliding his hand down again. His fingers hit the waistband of your underwear and you took a deep breath.
“Keeping these on?” He muttered as his finger hooked under the thin edge.
You pushed out the breath. “Yeah.. I.. I like seeing your hand in them.”
Harry’s eyebrows lifted and he gave a you a grin. “Oh, really? Someone’s a little dirty, hm?”
Your cheeks caught flames and you sunk your nails into his arm. “Harry, stop!”
He was amused by your embarrassed whine. “Don’t be shy, doll. Got a little dirty mind.. s’cute.”
The eye roll you gave him was partially playful. “Don’t be a butt right now.”
“M’not, darling. It’s just really.. hot to hear you say you like seeing my hand in your panties.”
You craned your neck to look up at him. His eyes were staring directly at you, of course, and it made your stomach churn with excitement. A smirk was toying on his lips.
“Please, m’gonna go crazy if you don’t start.”
He felt himself twitch, but he ignored it and tried to stay calm. This was about you and your pleasure, right now he didn’t care about himself. He quickly brought his fingers to his mouth and spit on them, which got your heart racing.
“Please.” You mumbled out again as he finally slipped his hand under the cotton fabric, your toes were already curling from the anticipation.
“Mmm, you’re so warm, darling.” He whispered to you while his fingers began exploring your small folds. As much as he wanted to see you bare, he was appreciating the feeling of every inch of you - every contour, every thin piece of skin, every single thing. “Fuck, and so wet for me, yeah?”
“Mhm, for you.” You uttered out through a whine, wishing he’d stop the teasing.
A moan fell past your lips as Harry began circling two fingers around your clit. He started off slow, but it didn’t stay that way for long. You grunted as he sped up, pressing down harder to give you the best feelings. His eyes were glued to your face as you squeezed your eyes shut and let out a continuous string of soft moans from your parted lips. He wanted to kiss them, wanted to make them red and swollen, but he was too focused on his movements. Besides, he adored watching you like this - the way your eyebrows knitted together, how your nose scrunched up, and how your teeth would bite down on your bottom lip. He admired every second of it.
“Oh my god.”
“Yeah? Feel good, darling?”
Harry chuckled a little at your moan. Your legs were moving around, your face was almost in the crook of his neck. Thoughts were filling his mind of things he wanted to do to you one day. He thought about how pretty you look down there, and he hoped he could see it soon. There were ideas of how you tasted, how you felt inside - he even wondered what your breasts were like. He knew he’d love them no matter what, and he was patiently waiting for the day you’ll show him. He tried to stay focused, but it was difficult.
Your nails scratched down his arm until your hand was tightly squeezing his wrist. It wasn’t preventing him from moving though, he didn't let up one bit. Moans filled the room as he added a third finger to your clit, just to be sure he was giving you enough friction. And he definitely was.
“Oh, Harry, please!” You cried out as he was pulling you to the edge.
“Want you to cum for me, peach, okay? Cum all over my fingers.”
You gasped suddenly, a bolt of electricity shot through your body. The pleasure was intense and magical, it couldn’t get better than this. Harry gave you a little grunt as you reached up to his neck to grab a hold of him.
“Please, please, kiss me, Harry.” You begged in between moans.
He gladly obliged and let you pull him down to your lips. His tongue swept into your mouth, and immediately you were exploding inside. It was so, so close. Harry kept his speed consistent as his mouth moved with yours. There was nothing you wanted more than to melt into him.
“Oh, fuck.” You tore your mouth from his, but didn’t move it.
His forehead pushed on yours as you moaned his name again, making his chest tighten up. “Close, darling? Cum for me.”
“Harry!” You squealed the second you felt your nerves electrify - waves of pleasure rushing through. His filthy words were working.
Your lips were rubbing against the corner of his mouth as you struggled to get your words out. “Fuck, Harry, m’cumming. I’m- I’m cumming, Harry.”
As you fell apart, he kept his pace and rubbed through your orgasm. You were throbbing and tingling, the feeling was intense you were becoming numb. He eased up on you, coming to a stop as your thighs squeezed together. He leaned his head back just a little to get a better look at you. Of course it was a glorious sight - your eyes were hardly opened as you sucked in and pushed out quick breaths. Your lips were a little swollen, and a bit of drool had collected in the corner of your mouth. He decided to give you a peck, just so he could he lick it up. It made you giggle, but you were still trying to catch your breath.
“Fuck.” You muttered when he pulled himself back up. “That’s.. amazing.”
“Yeah? Feel good?”
Your eyes moved to his and you gave him a gentle shake of your head. “Good? No.. incredible.”
His lips shaped to a smile, he was both proud of himself for making you feel nice and glad that you were this pleased. “Wanna go again?”
You let your thighs relax, but you quickly moved your hand to his - which was still in your panties. He laughed a little as your nails dug into his skin.
“Not yet.. need a bit.. to relax.”
After a few quiet moments, you brought your hand back up to your stomach and let it rest there. Harry’s hand was covering you entirely, but not pressing down hard enough to irritate your clit. He didn’t want to overdo it while you were recovering.
“Thank you.. so.. so much.” You said with a blushing smile as you finally regained some of your awareness and found his eyes.
“Don’t have to thank me.” He said back in a soft voice.
You didn’t respond, only because you were getting lost in his eyes. He was so handsome, and you felt incredibly lucky to be this close to him. Not only that, but you felt like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to have him all to yourself. There was a part of you that was very anxious about everything. You could lose him at any point. Someone could run into him randomly at a store and he could fall in love.. You feared that. It would be devastating to lose him. But for now, you focused on the fact he was actually here with you. He was all yours, even if it is just for now.
“What’s on your mind?” He asked quietly, his brows softly furrowing as he watched your facial expression shift.
“Nothing.”
“Hmm.” He didn’t believe you, but he chose not to pester you.
You didn’t want to ruin the moment, so you pushed all those thoughts away and let other ones come to the front of your mind. Harry smiled as you suddenly became very flushed and nervous.
“Can.. um.. can you..” You thought you were brave enough, but you weren’t.
Harry pressed a kiss to your forehead. “What is it, peach? Hmm?”
You shrugged lightly, not wanting to say it anymore. There was no point in trying to avoid it, though, especially since you wanted to bring it up so bad. You wanted to try it again and hopefully succeed at it. Last time, you figured you were too overwhelmed by everything to even focus on it. But now, even though it was only the second time, you wanted to try it.
“Your finger.. can you.. put it in for just a little bit? Wanna try.. to take it this time.”
Harry made sure to smile sweetly when you looked back at him. “Are you sure? I don’t wanna hurt you, sweetheart.”
“Promise, m’sure.”
He nodded gently, but didn’t say anything. You felt a lump begin to form in your throat. Did he not want to do it? Surely, you thought, he would be okay with that. Besides, he was the one who suggested it last time. Before you had time to worry too much, he finally spoke.
“Can.. can I ask you something first?”
“Yeah, ‘course.” The nervousness only got a bit worse.
Harry took a breath and glanced away from your eyes for a quick moment. You could tell he was also a bit unsure in the moment. You were worried that something bad would happen.
“Are you a virgin? I.. I don’t want to hurt you.” His words were soft, and his eyes were staring at you intensely again. He was worried, that was it.
“No.. just.. did it twice, though.” You told him, despite not wanting to admit to him that you had very little experience. That wasn’t his concern, though.
“Tell me if it hurts, okay?” He furrowed his brows a bit, making sure you knew he was being serious.
“Okay, I will.”
“Are you ready?”
You figured you were calm enough to start again. He took your nod as a sign of permission. There was a new, much higher level of sensitivity present now. Harry’s middle finger was gently rubbing through you, collecting your wetness on his skin.
“Gonna go slow, okay?”’ He said in a mumble as he gently rubbed the tip of his finger around your opening.
“Okay.. I’ll be fine.” You told him with a smile, but he was still nervous about the possibility of harming you.
He carefully slid his finger inside of you, going as slow as he could. He was very attentive to everything - from the little grunts you let out to the natural clenching you were doing. The last thing he wanted was to go too fast.
“Oh.” You gasped as his knuckle suddenly hit you. You hadn’t realized he was all the way in.
“Are you okay?”
You curled your hand around his elbow. “Mhm.”
He wasn’t sure if you were being honest with him, but at the same time he didn’t want to upset you - so, he pulled his finger out halfway, then pushed it back in. You whimpered, but weren’t seeming to be in any major pain.
“Just gotta get used to it, yeah?” He said comfortingly, trying his best to be there for you in case you were becoming nervous. You were actually okay, for now. “Do you do this yourself?”
You shook your head softly. “Not.. not a lot.. and.. your finger’s.. bigger than mine.”
He sighed. “Yeah, I know.. Promise me it’s good?”
“Promise, Harry.”
Once he had done it a few times, and he realized you were really okay and comfortable, he started going a little faster. You moaned softly, turning your head so that it was against his neck. He hadn’t noticed how close he had gotten until your lips were brushing his skin.
“I’ll take good care of you, yeah?” He said with a low, rumbling voice that made your stomach bubble. “Make everything feel so good.”
“Yeah.. feels great, Harry.” You assured him with a quick kiss to his skin.
He kept on, making sure his finger wasn’t jabbing into you. His movements were easy, gentle, and purposeful - his intention was to make you feel good. That pleasure was his focus, and it seemed like he was doing a good job at it by the way you were reacting.
“Oh, Harry.” You muttered out, your voice barely audible.
He smiled to himself and carefully pushed his finger in. You grunted when he didn’t retract it, he was frozen. You opened your eyes and moved your head to find his face. He was watching you, chuckling as you let out a whine and pinched his skin.
“Do you want to try a second one?” He asked in a calming voice, a slight lift of his brow followed his words.
You didn’t hesitate, just gave him a quick nod. He pulled his finger out and pressed it against a second one. You held your breath as he toyed at your opening for a moment, before finally pushing them back in. The feeling was different than when you did two of your own fingers. You rarely did that anyways, so it was almost a foreign sensation altogether.
“Is this okay?”
“Mhm, s’good.” You wanted to let out a moan but you didn’t. There was a small voice in your head that kept repeating: keep it together, don’t be too loud. You didn’t want to sound desperate, no matter how amazing it felt.
Harry was utterly amazed by how incredible you looked while taking his fingers like this. He was lost in his thoughts about the things he wanted to do with you, but he kept a piece of his attention locked on you. Your mind was practically spinning at this point, the pleasure was taking over.
You didn’t care how many fingers he had in or how fast he went, you were extremely sensitive and he was working to make that feeling even stronger. Your eyes rolled back as you felt a sudden wave ripple through your body. You snuck your hand into your panties, shoving beneath his to rub your clit. He bit down on his cheek as he watched you pleasure yourself. Within a few seconds, your thighs were shaking and your head was thrashing.
“Harry!” You squealed out as your fingers moved as quick as they could.
“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He uttered as your walls clenched around his fingers as hard as you could. It wasn’t something you could control in the moment, but he was eating it up.
“Okay, okay, okay.” You quickly grabbed his wrist and tried to pull his hand away.
He obliged and took his hand out of your underwear. You were still holding onto his wrist, and as you moved his hand closer to you, the glistening of your release on his skin caught your eye. Something inside of you sparked, and it was the most glorious sight you’d ever seen.
“Look at that.. covered me.” He said with a soft chuckle, just as amazed as you were.
You swallowed, trying to calm yourself down but your chest was still rapidly lifting and falling. “It.. was.. insane.”
A smile grew on his lips and he leaned down to press a kiss to your slightly sweaty forehead. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
You grunted, appreciating his care for you but wishing he wouldn’t ask that again. “No.. I love your fingers.”
“I already knew that, peach.” He shifted his eyes to his hand. “You’ve always had a thing for my hands, hm? Love holding them.. touching them.. love them in your panties.”
“Fuck.. please, don’t.. tease me right now.” You couldn't help but let out a small laugh.
Part of your mind was still foggy and trying to recover from the intense sensations your body endured just moments ago. And you weren't sure if your newest thoughts were due to that haze, or if you were thinking about them before.. You pulled Harry’s hand closer to your face, which made him very intrigued. He watched you carefully, not sure what to expect.
Perhaps you were just amazed by the amount that gushed from you, or maybe you were just admiring his fingers. Like he said, you have always loved his hands. But there was something more interesting on your mind, something that he definitely wouldn’t have predicted.
“I want you.. to taste me.” You said with a bold confidence that you were even surprised by.
Harry’s eyes shot to yours, and he didn’t hesitate. Your hand slid down to his forearm, still gripping him, as he brought his fingers to his mouth. He stuck them in one at a time, sucking them clean of your release. His eyes were fixed on yours the entire time, never once did he tear them away. You felt butterflies swarming in your stomach as he finished, licking his lips clean, too.
There was a silence, and you were afraid maybe he didn’t like it. He lowered his hand, moving it onto your neck to shift your head. He smirked, clearly satisfied by his experience.
“Sweet like a peach.”
Courage and lust were battling for control as you swiftly sat up and began trying to climb on top of him. His hands grabbed your body as he moved himself up against the headboard and your fluffy pillows. Before either of you realized it, you were on top of his lap again. But this time you were starving for him. You sat aside your worries and all those thoughts that were clogging your mind and you just kissed him.
Time was lost. All you could focus on was his tongue sliding against yours and his hands roaming your body. You felt him in his underwear, how stiff and ready he was. There were no other ideas in your mind - nothing you wanted more than him. Harry pulled back from your kiss as you grind your crotch against him. He looked down to witness it, and he felt like he could explode. Your nails dug into his shoulder as you looked down, too. It was definitely a sight to see.. something you could have never imagined weeks ago.
“Baby.” His deep, warm voice made your heart melt.
You found his eyes and smiled as you saw how desperate he appeared. You moved your fingers into his hair, rubbing the back of his head as he pulled you forward.
“Can I see you?” He asked, lifting his brows.
You gulped quietly, trying to avoid any anxious feelings from building up. You parted your lips to speak, but no words came out. His big, heavy hands were under your shirt already, but as he moved them up your waist close to your breasts, you realized what he meant.
“Just.. just want to see you.” He said in a softer voice, almost like he regretted asking. “You’re so gorgeous.. everywhere.. I just know it.”
After staring at him for a few long moments, wondering why you were being so hesitant towards this, you finally gave him a nod. He happily smiled and started pulling your shirt over your head. When you felt the cool air hit your skin, you shivered and twisted your fingers in his hair. He grunted as you gave him a gentle tug. His eyes dropped down your body slowly, soaking up the new found territory.
“Am.. am I.. okay?” You asked through a whisper.
He lifted his head and gave you a gentle laugh. “Okay? Baby, you're perfect.”
You gasped as his lips began attacking your neck. He sucked marks and left kisses all over your skin as he moved down your neck, over your collarbones, and ending up on your breasts. His hand pressed into your back as he shoved his face into your boobs, spreading his affection as much as he could. Your head fell back and you moaned as his teeth bit into your delicate skin, and his lips wrapped around your nipple.
Harry was not expecting to feel your hand brushing over his crotch. He tore away from your boob and gave you a curious look. Even when you climbed on to his lap, he wasn’t sure if it would lead to anything. You had been taking things slow and he was okay with that.
“I want to see you.” You said with a giggle as you repeated his request.
He licked his lips and smirked back. “Go ahead.”
You put on a brave front and reached into his underwear. As your hand wrapped around him, you were taken aback by the size and the feeling. It was much different than you imagined it would be. It was heavier and bigger than you expected, but not dangerously big. You were somewhat confident.
“You’ve had sex..but have you..” His voice trailed off and when you looked up at him, he was looking down at the bed. He was shaking his head to himself.
“Given a blow job?” You said suddenly, making his gaze dart back to yours.
He dropped his brows, his eyes intensely watching yours. “Yeah.”
As much as you wanted to show him you weren’t a first timer, that you were capable of doing all those hot, sexy things with him.. you were out of your comfort zone and knowledge with this one. You thought back to your previous situations and how you weren’t willing to do it then. Maybe you were just more afraid back then, or maybe you thought those relationships would go further and eventually you’d get the chance to. You hadn’t realized your eyes fell from his until you blinked and saw you were looking at the pillow next to him.
“I.. I’ve never..” You muttered back, feeling like you just took a massive hit to your gut. Was this the stopping point?
Harry reached up and carefully placed his hand on your neck. Your gaze moved back to his face and he gave you a soft, comforting smile.
“You don’t have to.”
You huffed back. “But I want to.. can you tell me how? Tell me.. what you like?”
He pushed your body closer to his, igniting a kiss. You squeezed him, and that alone would have made him cum if he hadn’t drilled into his mind that he would be patient with you, and for you.
“Just.. do what you think I’d like.” He said as you slowed the kiss to a stop.
“What if I don’t do it right?”
He smiled, amused by your innocence but excited for your intentions. “Trust me.. you won’t mess up.”
“Okay.” You fought off the nerves and just moved around until you were sitting between his spread legs and your knees were digging into the mattress.
“Damn.” Harry groaned as he helped you pull himself out of his underwear. “You’re so hot.”
You rolled your eyes and playfully smiled. You were glad he was just as excited as you were, but there was an ounce of worry you were struggling with. Of course you knew what to do, but the issue was doing it right..
“There you go.” He mumbled as you started to pump his length.
Your eyes were locked on him. He was reacting well to your hand, especially as you gripped it and squeezed in different spots. You were familiar with this part, it was the next portion that was intimidating.
Harry kept his eyes on you as licked your thick lips and leaned down to his cock. Before he could process one more second, your lips were enveloped around him. You sucked on his tip for a few seconds before letting it pop out, then your tongue swiped up his entire length. He let out a heavy groan and let his head fall back. That told you enough - you were doing it right.
“Fuck, peach.” The way he moaned that silly, but very special, pet name made your heart start to race. “You.. are you sure you’ve.. never done this?”
You dug your nails into his thigh as you twirled your tongue around him. He was lost in the bliss, but he wanted to watch you. You could feel his stare, but it only made you more motivated to do a good job. There wasn’t much anxiety hanging around now, you were fine. You liked the way it felt to have your mouth full of him. There was no way this would be the last time you’d do this.
Harry was falling apart above you. Moans and grunts filled the air as he gripped the sheet with one hand. The other was combing through your hair, pushing it out of the way as you sucked him until your cheeks were hollow. Your face was flushed and your lips swollen. But it was a beautiful scene in his eyes. You scooted yourself back, allowing for easier access. He just watched in awe as you gave him your first blow job. He was sure nobody’s first one was as good as yours. It was unbelievable.
“There you go, fuck, babe.” Harry moaned out as you flicked your tongue over the slit in his tip.
He was starting to convince himself this wasn’t real. How could it be possible that you’re propped up on the bed with your mouth around his cock and your ass sticking in the air? He tried so hard to not come undone, not yet at least - it was too soon.
“Fuck, baby.. you gotta stop.” He grabbed your head and pulled you up. “M’gonna cum if you don’t.”
You pouted and tried to take him back in your mouth, but he didn’t let you. “I want you to.”
He was breathing heavily, trying to compose himself. “Right now or when.. we..”
As your eyes widened, his words came to a halt. He looked away from you for a moment, unsure of what to say next. Did you want to go all the way? He definitely knew he did, but he’d be fine if you chose not to. You let go of his cock and wiped your hand on your thigh. There was spit on your skin and all over your lips. You threw your leg over his and returned to your previous spot. Without speaking, you grabbed his face and brought his lips to yours. You didn’t kiss him, just leaned close enough so they touched.
“I want you, please.”
The sound he made resembled a growl. You squealed as he grabbed you by your waist and pushed you onto the bed. He was quick to climb over you, his lips sucking a line down your arm as his fingers toyed with your panties. Your fingers curved over his jaw as he bit down on your wrist just slightly, making you wince. He pressed a kiss over each of your fingertips before lowering himself between your legs.
He grabbed your knees and pushed your legs upward. You took a deep breath as you felt his lips press on your covered clit. He pecked a line of kisses down your panties, until he reached your butt. You held your hand over your breast as he sucked a mark onto your cheek, biting down again just enough to make your toes curl.
“Harry, please.” You breathlessly begged, your hand searching for his. You grabbed his wrist and held onto him.
He flattened his tongue and licked a stripe up your panties, the pressure of his tongue made you tingle. You needed more of him, you needed to feel him.. He sat up on his knees and quickly hooked his fingers into the waistband of your panties. You locked eyes as he slid them off your legs and threw them down. He pushed your knees apart and fell forward, his mouth meeting yours for a few seconds.
You grabbed his face with both hands, holding him still as you pushed your forehead on his. “I want this.. so bad.”
He chuckled softly, his lips curving to a smile. “I want this, too, peach.”
“Peach.” You muttered back, your heart melting in your chest.
“Always my little peach, aren’t you?” He whispered through his smile. “Gonna eat you up, peach.”
“Please.”
He kissed you again for a moment before grabbing the backs of your knees to hold your legs up. You nervously laughed as he stared down at your exposed body. He could hardly believe this was real. His stare burned holes through you while he examined the newfound flesh.
“Fuck..” He breathed out while sinking between your legs. “Your pussy’s perfect.”
You shuddered at his filthy comment, your eyes squeezing shut. He glanced up at you, pleased by the fact your fingers were squeezing your breast as you waited patiently for him.
“Soaked for me.. of course.” He smirked to himself as his tongue coated his lips. “M’gonna wreck your sweet pussy, baby.”
Instantly, your eyes fell to the back of your head. Each stroke of his tongue through your folds was taking your breath away. He went slow and delicate at first, in order to appreciate every inch of you.
“Oh, Harry.” You mumbled out as he poked his tongue in your hole, just teasing you a little, before returning to your clit.
He switched between twirling his tongue around your swollen nub and taking it into his mouth to suck on it. Each decision he made was creating waves of pleasure that rippled through your body, head to toe.
You weren’t even sure of the minutes at this point. His sucking and licking and slurping was all you could focus on - and it felt wondrous. It was like your wildest dream had really come true. It was hard to catch your breath. You feel each of his fingers digging into your legs where he held onto you.
His tongue was wide and greedy, not leaving a single spot untouched. He paid a lot of attention to your clit, but eventually began sticking his tongue inside of you. Your eyes were in the back of your head as you groaned and mumbled his name, but you couldn’t hear anything. Your brain was foggy again, this time it was more intense. As the chemicals flooded your brain, your body became weightless. The bed felt like a cloud and stars filled your eyes.
You had never felt this good before. Harry kept on, glancing up every couple seconds to make sure you were enjoying it. The bliss had taken over. He hummed as you blindly searched for his head, then your fingers twisted in his hair. The vibration sends a shock wave through your body. He didn’t want to stop until you had an orgasm, and he was very successful at giving you one.
“Harry, oh!” You squealed as your head thrashed on the pillow and your thighs shook around his head.
The moment your release filled his mouth, he moaned and started to slurp up the mess he made. You could barely feel him anymore, your nerves were shot. He looked up and saw how worn out you appeared, and it made him smirk. His mission was completed - well, somewhat.
He crawled up to be above you, his hungry eyes staring into yours. You wanted to suck his tongue down your throat, but you were so exhausted. You gently grabbed his face with either hand and pulled him down. He wasn’t sure what to expect, but his heart skipped a beat as you placed a few soft pecks on the corner of his mouth.
“Feel okay?” He asked softly while your lips played along his chin.
“Mhm.. amazing.”
He chuckled and carefully nudged your head with his, exposing your neck. He dipped down to press a kiss over your skin. You grunted, wanting to have him closer. You moved your hands to his waist and tried to drag him down. He melted at your touch and let you have control.
“Thank you.” You whispered next to his ear, squeezing your eyes shut as you tried to comprehend how any of this was real.
“You’re welcome, peach.”
You moved your hand to his back and gently pressed your nails into his warm skin. “Please.”
He furrowed his brows at your quiet request. “Please, what?”
A huff flew from your lips and it made him smile. You were always a bit stubborn so he wasn’t surprised that you weren’t being straightforward with him. He leaned up, his eyes immediately finding yours. You didn’t have a lot of courage left, but you were trying so hard not to break eye contact. You wanted him more than anything, but you wished he could read your mind.
“Have to tell me what you want, darling.. so that I don’t do something you don’t want.” He explained after a few moments of silence.
You nodded, then closed your eyes. There was not any fear or anxiety, though. You just needed a moment to collect your thoughts and take a short break from all this. Everything you do with Harry is so intense and crazy, even if it’s not intimate. The last thing you wanted was to get suddenly overwhelmed and back out of it.
When your eyes opened, he noticed how soft they were. He licked his lips and lowered his brows, staring at you like he was trying to solve every little problem.
“What’s the matter?” He asked in a low voice.
You shook your head and gave him a smile. “Nothing.”
“Do you.. want to keep going?”
He gulped as he watched you suck in a deep breath. He wanted this as much as you did, perhaps even more. But he knew that this could easily disappear and you could change your mind. There would be no protest on his part, he aimed to always respect you. But right now.. he just wanted you to tell him what you wanted.
“Yes, please.”
Harry slid his hand down to your thigh and he carefully pushed it down so he could settle between your legs. You took in consistent steady breaths in order to stay calm. The weight of his body was comforting, the feeling of his lips pecking across your skin was causing goosebumps to appear. You were easily getting lost in that trance again, the pleasure was taking over your body.
“Tell me if it’s too much, okay?” Harry’s voice grabbed your attention and you snapped your eyes open.
He moved to his knees and grabbed his cock. You held your breath as his fingers slipped into you so easily. He moved them around, trying his best to prepare you for what was to come. You were still soaked, so he wasn’t worried about that. He knew it would probably be a little painful at first, but he hoped this would help. He spit in his hand and stroked himself to spread it. Your heart was racing as you watched.
Harry placed his tip at your entrance and bit down on his lip as he watched his head disappear inside of you. You gasped, your fingers twisting into the sheet as you squeezed your eyes shut.
“Tell me when to move.” He mumbled.
His hand was rubbing the outside of your thigh as he waited patiently for your response. He didn’t want to rush this at all, and you had to absolutely be comfortable in order for him to go on. You took a few deep breaths and finally nodded to him.
“Go ahead.. please.”
He pushed himself further in, watching your face contort as he stretched you out. He was nervous and afraid to move too quickly. You reached out for him and he couldn’t help but smile. He fell forward, his body covering yours as he went further in. Your hands slipped onto his sides, gripping him tight as he lowered himself to his elbow.
“You okay, peach?”
“Mhm.” You hummed softly as his lips moved to yours for just a few seconds.
He carefully pulled himself out and pushed back in. You let out a grunt and it made him slow his pace.
“Baby.” He uttered quietly against your cheek.
“Keep going.”
He did as you requested, even though he was afraid he was hurting you. You didn’t tell him when you last did this, so he wasn’t sure if you were struggling to get comfortable. He tried not to think about it.
“Peach, is it too much?”
Every time he called you that, your heart melted and you felt like the only girl in the world. You reached up and grabbed his jaw, angling his head up so his eyes could see yours.
“Shh.. keep going.. a little faster.”
He smirked, then obliged. You couldn’t hold in your moans as he filled you up, satisfying a feeling you never knew you could have. Your thumb slipped into the corner of his mouth as he let out a groan.
“Fuck.” Your eyes were falling back as he sped up his movements. You never wanted him to stop.
One of his big hands was glued to your waist as he started to pound into you. The other pressed into the mattress for leverage. You were acting shy at first, hardly touching him, but that quickly faded away. Before you realized how intense it had become, you were scratching across his shoulders and squeezing him hard. Your body was reacting in uncontrollably ways. Every time your walls clenched around his cock, he would groan deep in his throat and buck himself even harder into you. The feelings were overwhelming your body and it was hard to resist the urge to come undone. You wanted to hold out for him, wait a bit longer so he could enjoy it, but you couldn’t hold it in.
“Harry, m’close.” You warned as your mouth fell open and your eyes rolled back again.
“Yeah? So tight for me, baby.. gonna make me cum.”
He was hoping to last longer than this, but fucking you was like heaven. He was melting above you, every grunt and gasp for air was taking it out of him. He was ready to empty himself. And you, well, you were so lost in everything. You were sensitive from his previous services, so every thrust felt like a wave of pure pleasure. You weren’t sure of how long it had been going on, all you could feel was his hands on you and his cock sliding in and out.
“Fuck, fuck.” He grunted suddenly, his hand reaching up to cup your jaw.
You coiled your fingers around his wrist, holding on tight as he fucked himself deep, as far as he could go. Your stomach was rolling, your back arching up. He felt you moving beneath him and he knew you were close.
“Harry.. you’re so good.”
“Cum for me, baby girl.” His voice rumbled out.
You opened your eyes and quickly found his intense stare. “Please, please, can I cum, Harry?”
“Yeah, peach, all for me.” He grunted back, just as your pussy squeezed him tight again.
“I’m.. I’m about to.. to cum.” Your brows fell and you let out a beautiful moan, which only made him go faster and harder.
“Cum, baby.. cum all over me.”
Within a few seconds, your toes were curling and your thighs shook against his body. He was very close behind you. You held on as long as you possibly could and now it was finally rushing through you. Watching you cum from his cock was enough to make him erupt. He pulled himself out and emptied his cock on your stomach. You gasped and lifted your head to watch the last few ropes of cum spurt out. The feeling was interesting, and it was very warm on your skin. You gulped softly, hardly believing this was real. Harry grabbed his cock and wiped the end clean. You felt a wave of curiosity rush through you.
“I wanna taste.” You whispered while grabbing his wrist and guiding his hand up to your mouth. You moved so fast that he couldn’t stop you, even though he wouldn’t have anyways..
He grunted as you swiped your tongue over his skin, licking him clean of the drops he collected. All he could think about was the taste of your pussy and how tight it was, and how you closed your pretty lips around his cock and sucked him hard.. Everything that had happened tonight was flooding his mind, replaying in his thoughts and he knew that if he didn’t stop thinking about it, he would bust again.
You grabbed his attention by touching your fingers against his face. “Thank you.”
He laughed a little and shook his head. “No, thank you.”
“Was.. was it.. good?”
“You were incredible, darling.. so tight and wet.. I didn’t stand a chance.” He grinned.
As he relaxed his body onto yours, he felt his cum smearing on his stomach. It didn’t matter right now, he wanted to be close to you.
You looked over his handsome face, beads of sweat trickled down his forehead and his lips were swollen. For a moment, you were so in awe of his features and what he just did to you, that you forgot about everything else. But as his green eyes closed and his lips pressed a sweet to yours, you remembered that he was your best friend.. and you just had sex with him.
[a/n: I looove writing this pairing. expect an update soon, but shorter than this one lol. but I am going to return to consistent updating! Life is insane but hopefully I won’t have any more curveballs thrown at me!]
taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @victoriasigaard @ariiscringe @harlowsgirl @lomllover @haniaaa04 @sideboobrry11 @tenaciousperfectionunknown
want to join the list? go here -> xox
168 notes · View notes
unforth · 21 days
Text
Alright not to like liveblog my breakdown on main but yesterday was a really bad day after a really bad, like, 4 months, and I've hit a bit of a breaking point and one of the only things in my life that can give is running @mdzsartreblogs , @tgcfartreblogs , @svsssartreblogs , @erhaartreblogs , @tykartreblogs , and @cnovelartreblogs , so that is what has to give. It's been a 99-out-of-100 days thankless job. A small number of people do say thank you and yall I appreciate you so much (HUGE shout-out to the artist I met at Flamecon who gifted me a zine when I said I ran these blogs, @bonesblubs you rock) but I have never done an act of fandom labor simultaneously this labor intensive yet this invisible before and, uh. It sucks. I spend an hour or more a day on this every day, if it's under 2k hours since I started the first of these in September 2020 I'd be shocked. And I do it because I love it but doing it means I don't have time or energy to do other things I love. And I really don't want to just quit, but I can't keep this up.
In a last-ditch effort to try not to just give up, I'm making the following changes:
1. Only watching one tag per fandom for the MXTX fandoms. I am going to check *only* #tgcf, #svsss, and #mdzs. Artwork posted to any other tag, I will not see unless a mutual reblogs it.
2. Reduced tagging (even more). I'm only going to tag characters and maybe overarching au type (eg, "modern au," "fantasy au"). I'll no longer tag creatures. I will continue to tag the same common trigger warnings I already tag.
3. If a work's appearance doesn't make it obvious what it is AND the tags aren't clear, I'm not going to reblog. I can't keep spending 5 minutes or more trying to figure out what I'm even looking at, scared that if I guess wrong the artist will get mad at me for mistagging their work. If I do reblog, I'll tag only the artist name and/or whatever else I can identify for sure.
4. I am no longer going to follow #link click. The fandom is just too big. I've started dreading checking it. If I was more into it and less busy I would make another spin off just for it but neither of those is true. (The art is so good, I hate to do this, but. If you love link click, highly recommend the main tag, lots of great stuff there.)
5. I will no longer tag any non-cnovel content in the art/post. Like, if someone draws, idek, Xie Lian and Marinette from Ladybug, I'm not gonna put any tags for Marinette, just for Xie Lian.
6. Basically if I run into something hard to tag or confusing or unclear, my new policy is I'm not gonna fricken bother.
I think those are everything but idefk, I cried for 3 hours last night and got 4 hours of sleep so I'm mostly fueled by exhaustion and desperation right now and my memory is even more fried than usual.
How artists can help. This is obviously all optional. You do you. But since some people might want to know what would make my life easier, I'm sharing. I'm not claiming I feel entitled to dictate how people fandom or anything like that.
1. Put the tags for the character(s) and ship(s) early in the tag list.
2. If you make art for a fandom that isn't one of the big ones (right now the only big danmei fandoms on tumblr as far as I can tell are the MXTX fandoms and maybe 2ha) I am begging you to use my tracked tag #cnovelartreblogs
3. Do mdzs art? Tag #mdzs. Do tgcf art? Tag #tgcf. Do svsss art? Tag #svsss.
4. Not only artists, but everyone, *please* stop tagging fandoms not discussed and/or depicted in your post. It's gotten to be stupid common for people to blanket the danmei fandom tags with posts only about one fandon (like, svsss-only works also being tagged mdzs and tgcf and 2ha for some damn reason). This isn't about just my sideblogs tbh this is just fandom etiquette that seems to have been forgotten or never learned by many. Tagging unrelated fandoms isn't "reach," it's annoying. People go into the #mdzs tag to see mdzs, not whatever not-mdzs stuff people have decided to tag for ~reach~, and seeing the same post in 8 tags, none of which it's related to, is so damn irritating, and makes scrolling the tags looking for content that IS relevant take that much longer. Knock it off.
Okay. I think that's as much as I'm prepared to meltdown where everyone can see. Thanks in advance everyone for your understanding, and apologies to everyone about to see this 8 times as I reblog it to each sideblog.
At least I'm not tagging it to everywhere. 🤣🤣🤣
165 notes · View notes
skylarksilver · 2 months
Text
Hall of Fame (In my Home)
After finishing Cloudcalling, I had some thoughts.
In the universe where Leona likes Yuu and wants to keep them around. Be is romantically or plaronically, both work because he would be underhanded and possessive of his significant other and his friends. But the sneaky lion doesn't talk about that, he just focuses on obstacles that would prevent Yuu from living close by. He's had a plan in the works for a while to keep the prefect close.
But now, Leona has to take care of the obstacle of his own making. The title of Sunset Warrior is a big deal in his homeland. So the names of the participants and winners are probably recorded in a Hall of Fame somewhere. This means the prefects name is put down as a winner of the Bead Brawl. Neji covered for him in the moment. But Leona won't leave it to chance that someone will recognize the prefects name, see them in person, see how they move and realize that it was almost certainly not them who won the Bead Brawl. No, Yuu has to learn enough to act the part should it become necessary.
That's Leona's excuse to spend lots of time with them and he's running with it. He sets aside time to teach them how to fight in the Bead Brawl and persuades Yuu to join him for some one on one coaching. They had looked like they wanted to participate but had allowed his team to remain focused. He prepares to review the rules, but Yuu just grins.
"It's like flag football meets tag. I can play that. Let's do this!"
Leona's ready to write this off as overconfidence. But after several minutes of him trying and failing to get the beaded ribbons that they are using in place of beads, the lion beastman is honestly surprised. Yuu's past experience is formidable, and they honestly seem like they are having the time of their life dodging around him. It's not that they are faster than he is. They just judge his reach, speed, and their own position so well that cornering them is no easy task. And they are very good at deflecting his attempts to grab their agreed upon flag. His hunting instincts are on fire and he is having a fantastic time chasing his herbivore around their makeshift ring. And if there's trash talking? Game on. He's already planning the next session.
He does manage to snatch their beads and stop the training round, but it takes considerably more time and effort than he anticipated. In all honesty, it wouldn't take nearly as long as he expected to get the prefect to such a level where it could be reasonable for them to genuinely have won the Bead Brawl final.
Not that he let's the prefect know that. Nope, he goes straight into breaking down their performance and where they can improve. He's gonna milk as much time out of this as he can. It's time when Yuu's attention is on him and him alone. And his herbivore is both popular with their friends and extremely busy. He's a master long-term strategist, and his plan to coax Yuu to settle in the Sunset Savanna is gonna take years to play out. Especially since he needs them to think it is all their idea and not because he wants them close. But Leona can bide his time with the best of them, especially with such a prize as his herbivore on the line.
192 notes · View notes
ryndicate · 1 year
Text
Double Down ⨳ Yoshida, Denji
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Didn’t know you were into that stuff.”
warnings: fem body/pronouns, nudes posted without permission, drug use, exhibition, creampie, videos taken with permission, stepcest, infidelity, masturbation, handjob, some spit mentions, premature ejac, implied fuckery, implied theft, if there's more i am just too wacked out to see it so lemme know!
event: @bastardblvd 's slimeball alley collab !! my first submission of who knows how many to come, im gonna try to not go crazy with it, promise
notes: didn't realize until it was done that I could've made it much more slimy but its okay. We'll get 'em next time babes 😩 this idea is expanding on a little blurb I put in cassie's inbox once, i included it in the fic itself with some itty bitty changes
By expanding, you are consenting to viewing adult/dark content, and all warnings listed above. 18+ Minors DNI
Blog Rules/DNI
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Your fist slams on the bathroom door. “I swear to god, Denji! Where the fuck did you get those! Delete them now!”
“I already told you, Power found them online!” Your stepbrother yells back through the door, keeping his weight against the handle so that you can’t force your way in.
“You’re full of shit you fucking perv! You took them off my phone or something.”
“Wanna fucking bet? The real perv is that prettyboy bastard you call baby,” Denji sneers back, yelping as you get a good shove in on the creaking wood.
Your efforts to break the bathroom door pause. “The hell’re you talking about?”
“I told you he was trouble the day you two met. What—you think I was lying?”
You growl under your breath at the barenecked taunt in Denji’s voice. Yeah he told you, one time before he got high out of his mind. The only reason you even met Yoshida Hirofumi was because he hooked your stepbrother up a couple times, and you begged to tag along once. That situation ended with your brother counting stars on his buddy’s ceiling while you saw them on the backs of your eyelids with the guy’s lips wrapped around your clit. 
One thing led to another, and that “prettyboy bastard” became your boyfriend. He’s a bit of an ass, but Yoshida’s also sweet and funny, doesn’t roll his eyes at your music choices, doesn’t bat an eye when you want to go out with your friends, and is full of sexy, smirky sass that makes him so fun to be around. Sure, you sent him some photos, but he wouldn’t have put them out anywhere.
Your anger deflates, but your indignance does not. You step away from the bathroom door. “He’s got nothing to do with this.”
Denji throws the door open with a toothy grin, repeating himself. “You wanna bet?”
“You know what, yeah!” you snap at him, crossing your arms as he leans in the doorway, still looking smug. 
“Your boyfriend put your pics up on OnlyFans, and he’s using the money to pay for his xanny. If I’m right, you two gotta upload a video. Together,” Denji states, his eyebrows furrowed in twisted delight that makes you sneer at him.
“You’re disgusting!”
“Yeah? Tell me what you get if you win.”
Caught up in his childish bullshit, you push at his shoulder. “You gotta start an OnlyFans if you’re wrong, which you are. And you gotta wear lingerie.”
His smirk full drops at that, and he glares at you, cheeks darkerning. “Now who’s a perv.”
“This whole shit was your idea!”
“Lingerie?”
“How is wearing lingerie worse than telling your stepsister to fuck and post a video about it?!”
“Shut up!”
“And since we’re on the topic, I swear to god if you don’t stop taking my shit out of the laundry I’m gonna tell that redheaded lady at the DMV that she’s at the very top of your fap list.”
His blush deepens and he palms your face backwards in a light push. “The fuck she is. Shut up.”
“Yeah well, me and the thin fucking walls in this apartment would have to disagree.”
“Go find your boyfriend.”
“‘M gonna.”
“Fuck you.”
“Fuck you.”
Tumblr media
“Fuck him,” you hiss in barely supressed rage, gripping your boyfriend’s phone so tight you’re disappointed when it doesn’t crack. 
You’d waited for his high to hit him and let him drift off before going through his phone—what’s the point of asking him outright if it’s not true, right? No reason to stir the pot. But your stomach had dropped with unease when the account site was in his search history; you tried to brush it off as maybe he gets off to a set of camgirls, but the moment you saw the login info presaved—as in frequent entry—you began to forget the bet altogether.
Now your jaw is clenched, seething as you scroll through every racy picture you ever sent him. Each have thousands of views, hundreds of comments and jeez—so many subscribers. The heat of betrayal simmers through you. Your jaw drops at the total that’s set to drop into his account at the end of the week and resist the urge to slap Yoshida awake, but instead you set about trying to change the banking and login info, only to get halted by an infowall. Frustrated, you slip off the bed and call your stepbrother, edging into Yoshida’s bathroom so you don’t wake him up.
“You were right, and you fucking knew it, didn’t you? You set me up.” you hiss into the device as soon as he picks up with a mumbled ‘sup. You can hear voices and music in the background, paired with light explosions. You assume he’s out with his friends, probably gaming like usual. 
“You didn’t have to agree. Wait—” there’s the sound of the phone moving around and suddenly the music is gone. “Does that mean you’re gonna do it?”
“That’s besides the point, Denji!”
“Oh fuck, you are!”
“Chill your boner,” you snap, “‘m not gonna do it unless you help me!”
“Help you? What, like you want me to hold the camera or something?”
“Denji, I swear to god—”
“I’m kidding, jeez.”
“I can’t change the account info. They’re my pictures, and they’re already out there! He shouldn’t get to make money off of me.”
“Wait, so you want to keep the account?” He asks curiously. You hear a door slamming and wonder if he’s still moving, or if his friends are.
“Dude, we’ll have rent and anything else covered for the whole month with a single week’s drop from this thing. I don’t see a reason not to. I can quit Mcdonald’s!”
“Shit, for real? Lemme talk to Denki, ‘m pretty sure he knows a guy.”
“Thank you,” you coo into the phone.
“Yeah, yeah, just make sure you pay up.” You can hear his pervy smile, and you grumble a sulky fine at him.
“Ok. But he’s gotta do it soon. It pays out in a couple of days.”
“I’ll give him some cash to see if he can do it tonight. Don’t see why he’d say no—" Denji sounds a lot further away from the phone now, "—Oi! Don't bro! Give it back."
A familiar voice purrs into the receiver and you roll your eyes. "Heyyy, princess. You with that Yoshida guy still or are we allowed to hang now?"
"Byeee, Kiri. Tell Kat hi f'me." You hang up with a smile and leave the bathroom, glaring at your supposed boyfriend still sleeping. You never heard him say he was working and you always kinda wondered where he was getting his cash, but you always just thought he was dealing or something. Not the kind of think you ask about. You obviously should’ve asked.
You crawl into his lap and begin sucking on his exposed throat, admiring the sharp lines, the bob of his adam’s apple as thick lashes flutter open. 
“Mmm,” Yoshida moans. “Damn, was I out long?”
“Nah,” you hum, slipping your fingers up his shirt, smoothing over his waistline. “Got bored without you, that’s all.”
“Yeah, baby?” He grins up at you, dark eyes fuzzed out and sultry, and his hands come up to settle on your hips, easing you into a slow grind. “Wanna do something?”
“Mm. Maybe,” you tease softly, pushing his shirt up his chest and leaning down to wrap your lips around his nipples. He groans at the warm, slick suction, arching into your touch. 
“Fuck, baby,” he breathes out, his cock swelling beneath you. 
“Maybe I wanna do something…different.”
Yoshida grins up at you, half-lidded. “Yeah? Like what?”
Your nails make pink lines down his chest as you lean in to whisper in his ear. “What if you fucked me, and we let some people watch?”
His fingers dig into the fat of your waist, his dick thumping beneath you. “Anyone I know?”
Yoshida’s pupils have overtaken his coal irises, and you give him an inviting smile. “No one specific. I was thinking more like…a video or something. I wanna be able to see it later.”
“Holy fuck, baby. That’s sexy,” Yoshida grins up at you. “Didn’t know you were into that stuff.”
“Me either,” you breath softly, rocking yourself over his covered erection.
You’re left to yelp as he displaces you from your seat on his lap and pulls you out of the bed by your wrist with a wide smirk. “Come on.”
“Wait, where are we going?”
“Don’t worry baby, I just wanna pick something up at the Malmart first.”
“Fine, I guess,” you pout at him and his smirk only grows.
“‘S okay, baby. I’ll give you something too.”
Tumblr media
“This is not what I meant when I said video, Hirofumi!” you gasp out. Your fingers are splayed out on the hood of his car as you try to stay upright. “Someone could actually see us!”
"If you don't wanna be seen, you gotta cum. Cause I'm not stopping til you cum."
"Fuck, fuck please, just hurry up!" You plead, half your words caught between whines and whimpers as he pounds into you from behind, your skirt flipped over your back.
"You think I'm not fucking you like I mean it?" There's so much smile in his voice that you want to call him on his bullshit for once, but the solid smacking of his hips into yours, the head of his dick pressing as deep as it can go with every thrust quickly makes you forget what you're snapping at him for.
"Just‐just, fucking make cum– ‘fumi!" You're desperately telling yourself you don't want to be seen. It's the middle of the night, so even here, parked under the one of the many lightposts that don’t work in grimetown's 24-hour walmart parking lot, the risk of anyone seeing is slim.
But not zero. Especially with the light from his phone camera shining down on your exposed lower half. You’re like a slutty beacon for whoever might be looking this way.
"I'm working on it baby, you gotta relax." His fingers slide around your waist, brushing past your clit and forcing a frustrated whimper past your lips at the neglect, to drag them through the slick dripping obscenely from your pussy lips. It's dripping to the rusted black hood, making it glisten. He aims the camera down at them before moving it back to the way your pussy clings to his cock. "You're so fucking wet for this, you'd think the whole thing was your idea. Well, most of it was."
You don't answer him, trying to work yourself back on him, chasing that fluttering heat twisting itself tighter and tigher with each passing second.
"Good girl, look at you. Fuck, look how bad you want—"
"Oi! Get the fuck out of here before I—"
Your whole body locks up at the tired but authoritative voice that rings across the lot.
Your boyfriend calls back. "C'mon man, have a heart. Let me finish her off and I'll give you a look." Except his last syllable staggers off with a groan, broken with a laugh as his grip on your hips tightens to a bruising pressure. The vice grip of your cunt has him looking down to sees your juices gush around the girth of his cock, dripping down your thighs to dirty the hood of his car even more. The sight pushes pushes him over and he calls out again, his voice tight but smug.
"Nevermind, we're done here."
He gets one last shot of his cum dripping out of you before closing out the livefeed.
Tumblr media
“It’s like four in the morning,” Denji grumbles, rubbing one of his eyes as he cracks his bedroom open further at the sight of you. “Thought you were Power or somethin’, jeez.”
Denji blinks the blur from his eyes, zeroing in on your screen, and you just about hear his pupils expanding. He pulls a shaky inhale and you roll your eyes.
“Done. Bet over, and here’s your damn proof,” you grumble right back, slamming your phone against his chest and shoving your way into his bedroom to flop down into his bed. It had taken over an hour to convince Yoshida back to his place and get him to fool around enough for him to pass out and you to sneak back home.
"Also Kiri wants you to call him back. He's mad you hung up on him."
A small grin curls your lips but you don't respond, wiggling deeper into his mattress until you're comfortable.
He throws himself down in the bed next to you. “Turn on my speakers.” 
“Or you could just wear headphones, you freak.”
“Nah. Turn ‘em on.”
With an exaggerated sigh, you stretch out to reach up to his desk, turning on the bluetooth speakers that he usually uses to be a nuisance when he’s smoking. “If your dad was home, I’d kill you for this.”
“You’re not even breaking up with him, are you?” Denji chortles, ignoring your bickering. His eyes are glued to the screen as he shoves a hand into his loosened shorts. “What the fuck, you guys were outside?”
You shrug. The video’s only been up for a couple hours and it already has triple the views and donations of all the photos Yoshida has put up so far. “Looks like he’s gonna be making me lots of money, so why not? It’s the least he could do to pay me back.”
Your stepbrother doesn’t answer you, his breathing getting heavier. You close your eyes and sigh as the sounds wet sounds and your own whiny moaning starts bouncing off the walls of his room, wondering to yourself if you really sound like that or if part of you was exaggerating because of the camera. The mattress creaks every now and then as his hips jump, his arm brushing your side as he grinds into his own fist. 
You roll to face him, taking in the sound of his stuttered breaths, the muted slick sound of his fist pumping in his shorts. “So what about this gets you so riled up?”
Denji groans, stomach rippling where his shirt is pulled up around his midsection. “I’nno, it’s hot, isn’t it?”
You keep prodding, “What is? Yoshida? Or me?”
He gives a small whine that has your pulse picking up in sick interest, so you continue. “Was Power really the one to find it? Or…you were subbed to the account, weren’t you Denji?”
“Mm- maybe?”
“Shit,” you whisper to yourself, listening to your own voice begging to cum, shifting your weight onto your arm so you can look at him. A strange curiosity has taken over your body. He looks wrecked but his eyes are still on the screen. “Denji, look at me.”
Your body tingles as his eyes tear towards you, but he’s still got a hand around himself, hidden from your eyes. “Can I touch it?”
“You wanna what?” he moans, just barely, teeth digging into his lip.
“Can I jerk you off?”
You’re a little surprised when he actually hesitates. You’ve tolerated it all this time; as much as he pervs out on you, and your stuff, yet somehow he’s got a little crumb of morality left in there somewhere. And right now…you wanna kill it.
“My panties, my pictures…is this really any different?” you ask softly, sweetly, as you run with this electric current, placing your hand over his covered groin. You grin as his hand immediately goes slack at your touch and slips out of his shorts, and you get to feel for the first time how hard he is, rubbing over the smooth fabric, feeling out the shape of him.
“I mean…I guess not.” He sucks in a breath as you grip him over his shorts and give a couple experimental strokes. “B-but what about—?”
Denji’s head drops back to the pillows with a groan, phone in a death grip as you tug his waistband down, his dick slapping free. It’s pretty and slender, flushed deep red.
“What about what?”
“What about prettyboy, huh?” He finally gets it out as you spit in your hand and take him up again, stroking him steadily from base to tip, squeezing at the top with a gentle twist of your wrist. Yoshida always seemed to like it, seems like he does too. 
“That’s what you’re worried about? Not the whole stepsister thing?” You shrug. You’re still stung about Yoshida’s betrayal, so this feels like a little bit of retribution. A little bit. You still need to find more ways to make him pay first, but this is a good start. “Yeah, he’s my boyfriend, but ‘s not like you and me are dating, Denji. It’s a handjob. What’re you gonna do, marry me?”
Denji splutters and his dick throbs in your hand. “Don- Don’t say stupid shit!”
You coo at him and his lips part, panting hard as you work him faster. 
“What– haa, what if it wasn’t just a handjob? What then?” Denji gives a low moan as you settle over his lower thighs so you can gently cup his balls. They seem to tighten under your touch, before he relaxes and he tries to look at you. 
“What, like my mouth or something?” you ask playfully, leaning over and showing him your tongue, letting a strand of spit drip down to his dick.
A litany of curses tumblr from his mouth as Denji squeezes his eyes shut, fingers twisting into the pillow beneath his head as his cock jerks and shoots a load of hot sticky white into your palm, getting smeared down his throbbing shaft as you slowly work him through his high until only a couple dribbles get pressed out by a final pass of your thumb over his slit.
“Wasn’t expecting you to finish already.” You wipe your hand off on his comforter and try to ignore the throbbing in your panties. You feel like you can still imagine the slick from earlier tonight seeping out of you, but it’s as if it’s no longer enough.
“Holy fuck,” he mumbles under his breath, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes as he calms his breathing enough to raise himself up on his forearms. He watches you as you take your phone and flop down next to him. “I didn’t even get to see the rest of the video.”
“It’s online now, freak. You can watch it whenever.”
“Yeah...” 
You’re too busy trying to go through the account settings to notice the way he’s eyeing up your thighs; he hasn’t even put his dick away yet. 
“Hey,” he mutters softly, ignoring your glare when he puts a hand on your thighs and pulls them open. “If you can touch me, does that mean I get to touch you?”
Your pulse jumps and you try to keep your true thoughts hidden as you hide back behind your phone. “I guess that’s fair. If you wanted to.”
You can hear the click of Denji’s throat as he swallows, and you can’t stop the low whimper as his calloused fingers brush your inner thigh, right at the edge of your panties. 
They’re warm as they brush over the seat of your panties, timid but curious as they explore the surface, stroking over the tempting warmth and wet seeping through the thin fabric. A bolt of pleasure bursts and has your gut clenching as he swirls over your clothed clit
“H-hey, wait,” you say suddenly, nerves getting the better of you as you try to make sense of Denji taking control of your body. “It got switch but this isn’t my banking info. Is it yours?” You flip the screen towards him, and his brown eyes squint in the pale blue light.
“Uh, nah, that’s not mine.”
You mewl as he pulls your panties to the side and traces a finger through your folds, delicate, hungry. “Who did you say– mm, h-hacked the account for me?”
“I told you. M’friend Denki, his buddy did it. That purple-haired guy who works at the smoke shop.”
“The one wi—” you suck in a breath as he sinks his index finger into you. “With the tattoos?”
“Yeah him,” Denji mumbles, hardly paying attention to your words. He’s grinding against the bed as he pushes his middle in alongside it, imagining the tight squeeze around his dick instead.
Your groan is part pleasure, part dismay as you realize just who he’s talking about. “Oh fuck me.”
Denji bullies his way between your thighs in an instant.
“N-no, Den– that’s not what I meant!”
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
crippleprophet · 6 months
Text
i don’t understand how people can be so fucking cruel about people who can’t read much (including people who aren’t literate, though this post is from my experience with chronic illness). like, one of my main motivations behind posting excerpts of butch+femme writing on my main (@campgender ; it’s fine to go through my bookshelf tag but please only followers age 18+ on that blog!) is that it is fucking hard to read a full book!!
my reading comprehension & stamina decreased drastically when i developed worse chronic fatigue, & while i’m overjoyed that i’ve recently regained a lot of that particular ability since getting blackout curtains, there are absolutely still texts i can’t even begin to parse that i once would’ve loved digging into — texts that it would be actively dangerous for me to attempt to struggle through because it would break pacing.
idk i’m not trying to be self-congratulatory here or whatever but like. the second i could access information through this means again, the focus of my (very fucking limited!!) energy has been giving it back to my people. my life has been unquestionably, deeply shaped by tumblr users who share excerpts of theory & memoir & poetry because they were providing labor of which i was in need & incapable.
finding, selecting, transcribing, formatting, & at times contextualizing passages takes a lot of fucking time & energy, but in order for me to encounter certain concepts, experiences, & histories, it’s work somebody else had to do, because i couldn’t read 200 pages of research or anthology in order to encounter the 10 that would change my life — but posted 2 or 3 pages at a time, i could save that in my drafts to get through on a good day, & quotes that were only a couple lines i could usually read right when i encountered them.
so, in memory of the years i spent unable to access theory through anything other than excerpts & secondhand summaries,
and in anticipation of the years to come where i will live the same,
and in acceptance that the brain is a muscle, in love of we the exercise-intolerant,
to you, dear reader — whatever form & frequency & duration that reading may take, even if it’s no further than this post — i make my motherfucking covenant: the issues i discuss around pulling quotes will be about the political act of the ellipse and the ethics of transcription, not shaming people for the methods of accessing information that are available to them. as often & as long as i am able, people can ask me to explain something or summarize in plain language and i will meet them with respect, interest, & effort. if someone’s looking for information on a particular topic, identity, experience & doesn’t have the energy to find it, i’m gonna give what i have towards filtering through the bullshit for the gems.
according to our abilities. according to our needs.
and the next time somebody tells you it’s not ableist to say everyone has to read [whatever work], tell them to go put their precious ability to better use in making it more accessible.
294 notes · View notes