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mushi42 · 1 year

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YOU HAVE THEM ALL WRITTEN??? can i just...request the rest then...it's my second request im sending in but im loving these so <3

Not a problem at all! I really had fun doing this game and got carried away.

I'm just going to copy pate the whole document 1-29 to make it easier. So you've read some already. And I'll put a link to the original ask game that I reblogged earlier if anyone else wants to play.

Cheigo!!! answers below the cut (Just a heads up mentions of pregnancy/breeding and chronic illness)

1 What was your first time with your f/o like?

Contrary to popular opinion, Keigo is not the playboy he is portrayed as by the media. His agency set up a few fake relationships for the sake of appearances but they mostly wanted the “everybody’s Hawks”to be the most prominent image. He has stolen a few kisses and make out sessions here and there but never more than that. So when we first met he was actually a virgin. I was unaware of this at the time. When we decided to move forward with a physical relationship he wanted to preserve his “cool guy” image with me. He was afraid of being rejected if he couldn’t be amazing at everything. He read all those grocery store articles about sex beforehand. When we were getting ready to actually start he ended up having a panic attack. After calming him down and assuring him there was nothing wrong and I still liked him, he asked to continue. Just knowing he could stop if it became too much seemed to help. It wasn’t our most mind blowing night together but it’s one of my favorites. We were so open and communicated so well that it was an extra special moment in our relationship.

2 How often do you and your f/o have sex?

Now that he’s more confident in his skills and our relationship (I’m not leaving or using him) he’s got a fairly high libido. Minimum 4 days per week but he’s more of a fan of everyday. (times per day also vary)

3 Is the Sex between you and your f/o usually sensual? Passionate? Animalist?

This is a cop out answer but it really depends on the day. He is very enthusiastic no matter what mood he’s in. But some days it’s about being close and just together but there are other days where he has an itch that NEEDS scratched. If I had to pick I’d say it’s usually a passionate worshiping kind of me.

4 How messy is the sex, or do you and your f/o try to keep it as clean as possible?

HAHA it’s so messy and dirty when we are done. In hotel rooms he tries at first to be a bit more restrained but at home it’s a mess. New sheets and blankets most days. Good thing I’m a SAHW and can do laundry everyday. It’s going to be a problem when we move to Japan and I have to air dry them.

5 Do you and your f/o prefer having sex in the dark or with the lights open?

Keigo is a fan of lights. His favorite part of sex is my reactions to what he’s doing. If I try to turn them off because I'm embarrassed then I get punished.

6 What was the most embarrassing thing to happen between you and your f/o before, during and/or after sex?

7 Any Favorite positions?

Between his wings and my ostomy bag (I have Crohn’s and a permanent ostomy bag) we do have some limitations on positions. We enjoy missionary. He likes looking me in the eyes and watching my face during sex. It makes him proud to watch me squirm. We also like on all fours for some different times. We’ve definitely done other stuff but those are our tried and true!

8 Any favorite places?

The Kitchen and laundry room are used a lot just because I’m in those areas a lot and Keigo doesn’t like to wait (I make him sanitize the counters after). He keeps saying when he eventually moves us back to Japan that the bathroom will be another busy area because they are better set up than western ones. Sometimes he likes to pull me into closets/tucked away areas for some teasing in public. We always end up in the bed at some point just because he wants me to be comfortable when we finish. I’m his little babybird. He can't have me getting a backache from sleeping on the hard ground.

9 Any Kinks and/or fetishes?

He loves being called Daddy. He saw it in porn and it stuck but he likes it so I go with it. We both have an extremely strong breeding kink. When we first started dating/sleeping together he was so upset to find out I was on birth control. “How can I put a chick in you if you’re on birth control?” he would pout. The first thing he did when we got home after proposing was throw all my birth control away. And I've mentioned in other answers he’s a big fan of overstimulating me.

10 Any erogenous zone?

His wings are very sensitive to the point we have to be careful to to overstimulate him. (he does the overstimulation not the other way around. He loves playing with my ass and I have sensitive ears. Don’t know why my ears are an erogenous zone but blowing or touching them is very sexy for me

11 Condom or bareback?

Bareback 100%. He’d rather just not have sex than use a condom. He did it twice for the sake of trying for me since I was his first partner and he didn’t know what it would feel like. It doesn’t allow him to indulge in his breeding kink enough with a condom. So I got on birth control, which he didn’t love either but agreed to until we were engaged.

12 Your favorite body part of your f/o? Their favorite part of you?

In a non sexual way- I love his hair. It’s beautiful no matter the length and I love running my fingers through it. And he loves my eyes. He likes looking into them and seeing all the colors.

In a sexual way- I love his wings because they are so sensitive. It’s the only part of him that lets me have type of control during sex. He is so incharge but a quick stroke of his wings makes him lose his mind. Which to be fair can work against me sometimes. He loves my chest. He loves to watch my breasts bounce and jiggle them. He enjoys teasing my nipples. And He loves when he’s done resting his head on my chest as a play with his hair and it makes him feel so close to me.

13 Who’s usually the one taking the lead?

Since he came into the relationship with so little experience I let him take the lead and be in charge. I wanted him to know that he was in control and I wouldn’t push things on him that he didn’t want. It just stayed that way as we continued. It’s fine though as it fits with my generally submissive nature.

14 What’s something that usually gets your f/o in the mood?

He is pretty easy to turn on but one of his biggest turn ons is when I’m domestic. Cooking, cleaning, taking care of him. He loves getting the love and family he didn’t have as a child. Pretty sure that’s why he has a breeding kink is because he is dreaming of growing and making a real family of his own.

And it’s cliche but he loves when I feel cute/pretty and always wants to encourage that. I don’t usually feel very comfortable in my body with all my health issues. When I do he likes to go big into body worship so I can understand how sexy he finds me.

15 Do you prefer pleasuring your f/o or having them pleasure you?

It’s a little selfish but I prefer being the one receiving pleasure. It’s fine! He gets off getting me off!

16 Sweet love making or fast and hard fucking?

it’s almost always both. We start sweet love making and end in hard lose of control fucking.

17 Does your f/o keep their eyes locked with you the whole time or do they look away in embarrassment?

Even our first time he wouldn’t let me look away. He craves the connection of looking me in the eye. It gives him reassurance that he’s “doing it right” and that I’m enjoying myself. He loves my eyes anyway and likes when I look at him. He says he can feel the love coming out of them.

18 What’s the foreplay like? How quick is it to get both your clothes off?

The occasional times that I lead/initiate are super easy and minimal foreplay. Just look at him and say breed me or I’m ovulating and we are naked before I can get anything else out. He usually teases me though when he’s leading. He’d spend his life buried between my thighs so that foreplay is his go to.

19 Does your f/o tease you, or do you tease them, if there is any? How do you/they handle it?

Keigo is the king of teasing. I might get a little quip in every now and again but that is his territory. He loves overstimulating me physically and mentally. He loves to remind me that he’s in control. And in public places he’ll whisper all the things he wants to do to me where he knows I can't fully react. Watching me squirm brings him so much joy. My life is a keyboard smash every day

20 How good is your f/o at oral? How do they use their lips and tongue to pleasure you?

Keigo is amazing at oral. He says it’s more for him than me at this point. He would spend most of his time there if I let him. He has a silver tongue in every sense.

21 How does your f/o taste

Usually a little salty. I tease him about it. He loves sweets and consumes so much sugar I say he should taste more like it.

22 Is there any dirty talk? If so, how dirty? What about pet names and/ or derogatory names?

I love my birdie, he never shuts up. Constantly telling me I'm his good girl and taking him so well at the start. As it progresses and he starts to lose control of himself it becomes more derogatory. I’m his little slut and loves watching me become a stupid,cock drunk whore for him. He does tone it down and stick to positive when I’m having bad body image days.

23 How good is your f/o with their fingers/hands?

He’s not bad with them. They can certainly get the job done when needed. But he’d rather use his tongue,dick, or feathers to do the work. He uses his hands to hold me down/in place.

24 How Loud is your f/o? Do they moan/whine/whimper? Do they curse? DO they call our name like it’s the only thing they know?

He actually isn’t very loud most of the time. He talks constantly but it’s almost always just at speaking or whispering tones. He definitely curses and moans as he first sinks in and right at the finish. He usually calls me songbird or just his/mine rather than my name. It is one of the only words, my songbird his songbird his mine all mine, by the end.

25 Do you and your f/o hold hands while making love? How tightly do they hold onto you?

He holds my wrists and hips more than my hand. And I have some pretty consistent bruising from how tight he holds. Part of why he moved to my hips is all the looks and questions we were getting about the bruising on my wrists.

26 What’s your f/o’s stamina like? Do they last long or finish quickly? Can they go multiple rounds?

He has tons of stamina. All those years of specialized training, not even just basic hero training has made him a machine in that area. He actually jokes he keeps up with his gym routine to be better for me rather than work. And sex is the one thing his signature speed doesn’t touch. He lasts long and is always up for multiple rounds. It’s not fun to finish quickly and not fair to only go once in his mind.

27 Is there anything that makes your f/o cum every single time?

If we are already going then playing with his wings is an easy finishing move I have. And begging him to put a baby in me. To mark me as his so no one can ever take me away brings out the crazy eyed Hawks and we usually wrap up that round fairly quickly.

28 How wrecked/spent does your f/o look by the time the two you are done? Do they have a dazed look on their face? Completely disheveled hair? Chest heaving fo breath?

He’s always pretty exhausted at the end but almost never allows himself to reach complete uselessness. He wants to be able to provide aftercare. But also in the back of his mind is the idea that work could call him away or an emergency could happen at any second. He can’t fully allow himself to be drained. He’s letting himself get looser as we’ve been together.

29 What’s the aftercare like, if there is any?

He always makes sure I rehydrate water or gatorade, even when I whine about wanting soda instead. He makes sure that I’m in a comfortable position so my body doesn’t hurt extra the next day. Usually some basic cleaning of both of us. Lots of cuddles and I tell him how loved he is and that I am thankful for the family we had made together. Things to reassure him and remind him he has value outside of his hero work.

#mushi self ships 🐇#Cheigo #All the dirty self shipping #I'll make something sweet later

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rexscanonwife · 1 year

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Thank you sm for letting me chat with you even if its over anon! I've been dying to talk about MHA and S/Is!!!! Mha was a big inspiration for me! It got me back into writing, drawing, and being active on my self shipping page :) I don't ship with anyone in mha but for a while I was really focused on All Might/Toshinori. I really admire him and I enjoy writing angst and battle scenes against AFO involving Toshi(THAT episode tho.. //SOBS)... Like I said I'm a sucker for angst haha. But my focus has gone to Mirio now... I'm just weak for sunshine boys and I think he's such a cool character. I consider him a platonic soulmate <3 He's silly and fun and his quirk animated is so cool!! I'm a complex person with complicated feelings- as is my s/i, so being around the positive bright people makes me really happy :) (and despite her great love for mirio she has extreme beef with Sir Nighteye) for her quirk she can basically convert her own energy into shocks of power but it can only be produced from the palms of her hands. she uses it to boost her own close-combat physical attacks(that was a bad description sorry I'm trying not to go on and on and spam your asks this message is already so long SORRY /Sobs im excited) I love writing fight scenes and anything angsty so my s/i is all in for combat. But since her quirk takes energy it makes her tired quickly- she can't handle long dragged out battles. Sleep helps her recover <3

A good friend of hers is Aizawa even though they buttheads a lot, he helped get her a small job at the UA. she helps with combat training every few days a week :) (gosh sorry again for the long message I tried to keep it vague) (i feel like im exposing myself a little with this ask but I NEED to talk mha so badly)

HIIIII AGAIN!!! :D 💖💖💖 gosh, first of all I understand what you mean about a piece of media inspiring you to create more!

But GODDD THE AFO/TOSHINORI FIGHT COMPLETELY WRECKED ME 😭😭 I have SO many thoughts about it, and I couldn't help but wonder how my s/i would react or play a part in it or the aftermath if she was there. I am VERY interested in your thoughts about it and about Toshi angst in general though! Tbh MAKE ME HURT, I love it!! 😂😂

That being said, I'm just starting to get to know Mirio in show and at first I was a little distrustful of his personality but I see he's just a genuine himbo after all!! I love how ppl are constantly pointing out that his grades are kinda below average but he's a fucking BRICK HOUSE!! Im also SUPER curious about your beef with Sir Nighteye 👀 he's so attached to Mirio, I love that his whole problem with Midoriya is "why did HE get to inherit OFA, what's wrong with MY boy? >:/" but barring that, I love seeing how he's actually very intelligent in other ways and I'm excited to see him in future arcs!

And about your s/i, I adore her already!! She sounds so fun, and her quirk sounds super cool and useful! Have you considered getting her any gear or anything to help her concentrate her energy blasts, or perhaps direct them in other ways she might not be able to by herself? :0 how long has she been a pro? Lots of fun things to think about!! And as a fellow Aizawa botherer I approve of that greatly! 😁💖💖

#jane journals #self insert talk #❤️ scars and stripes 💙#mha anon #my dms are still opennnn :3 ive been having so much fun talking so far!!#im excited to hear more abt her and her relationships!! i want ALL the drama!!#long post

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wizardcommune · 3 years

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tanjirou kamado sfw alphabet

pairing - tanjirou kamado x demon slayer!reader

warnings - there’s a mention of him proposing in r, so if that makes you uncomfortable make sure to skip it!

word count - 1.6k

a/n - i really like writing for tanjirou since he’s a kin of mine; it makes it a lot easier HAHA

also i apologize it got shorter at the end!!

(requests are appreciated! rules + media i write for are in my pinned post)

a = affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

tanjirou is actually affectionate in every way!! he loves physical affection because it’s the most soothing to him, but he’s always complimenting you or giving you gifts, too. he likes receiving affection the same way, but isn’t disappointed if you don’t. (he understands people show their love in different ways, so it doesn’t hurt him at all! as long as you know how much he appreciates you, he’s fine.)

b = best friend (what would they be like as a best friend? how would the friendship start?)

it’s likely he met you at the final selection or during one of his missions, and he took a liking to you immediately. you met nezuko by accident, passively pointing out that “there was a demon in his box.” he immediately shielded it, but seeing how you didn’t make any advances calmed him.

as a best friend, he respects you so much!!! seeing you with the others makes him happy too. he’s always doing acts of service to help you, and giving you advice that urokadaki or the hashira gave him!!

c = cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

tanjirou really loves cuddles! (he likes physical affection in general, really.) it makes him feel like you’re both safe.

he’s okay with any position, but he prefers to be able to see your face. he also really likes talking to you while cuddling!

d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they at cooking and cleaning?)

he’s great at cooking + cleaning since he helped take care of his siblings! i hc that he’s really good at baking, so he’ll often make random food for you and the others. :)

very very minor spoilers for the end of the manga (it’s the same spoiler as the one in the zenitsu sfw alphabet):

in terms of settling down, his dream was literally just to move in with you and the others, and to actually be able to do that meant so much!

some day he’d like to have kids, but if you didn’t want any, he’d just hope the others have kids LMAOO

e = ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

ONCE AGAIN IM SKIPPING THIS BC IT MAKES ME SAD

f = fiance(e) (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

commitment doesn’t scare him, luckily! he honestly really enjoys the idea of getting to be with his partner forever :))))

i think he’d want to get married a few years into the relationship, but he’d hold off until he was absolutely sure they were safe.

g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

he’s so gentle ohh my god

even though he knows you’re strong, he’s still very careful with you!

emotionally, he’s the same! he never wants to say anything that could potentially hurt someone. especially since he’s tanjirou; he’s so kind

h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

hugs are his favorite; he hugs you as often as possible!! they’re really comforting as he’ll always rest his head on yours or on your shoulder. he likes rubbing your back, too!

i = i love you (how fast do they say the L-word?)

really fast, actually! it’s not like he’s rushing it, though. he always says ‘i love you’ to his friends and nezuko because he wants them to know he cares about them. so when he started dating you, he still said it!

j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?)

honestly? tanjirou doesn’t get jealous. he respects you enough to know you wouldn’t cheat on him, so if he ever sees someone flirting with you he trusts you to tell them you’re taken.

if the person flirting doesn’t let up, however, he’ll get more protective and will them to leave.

k = kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?)

his kisses are very gentle!! he doesn’t want to overwhelm you in case you want to stop.

his favorite places to kiss you are your forehead and shoulder!! for the former, it’s always comforting to him when he’s able to cup your face.

his favorite places to be kissed are his neck and nose. it always flusters him HAHA

l = little ones (how are they around children?)

king had five siblings, he’s great with kids. he likes them too! he’s sweet anyways, but he always tries to be like. 10x kinder when he’s with some

he really likes giving kids gifts, too! if he finds a cool gem or something on his travels, he’ll gift that to them :)))

m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

since tanjirou always woke up so early when he lived with his family, it’s a habit that stuck with him! staying in bed after he wakes up makes him feel restless, so he’ll normally just kiss your forehead and get up

n = night (how are nights spent with them?)

before bed, he always makes tea! it helps him sleep better and he hopes it helps you too. right before you go to sleep, he likes asking about your day or dumb stuff that inosuke did

o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

it won’t take to long for him to tell you about his family. he just wants to make sure he can trust you!! he won’t want to talk about it often though, considering how recent they died

it’s a huge compliment when he does, actually! it means he holds you in really high respect

p = patience (how easily angered are they?)

this is tanjirou we’re talking about, literally nothing you can do will piss him off. unless you beat up nezuko or something ig??? please don’t do that

q = quizzes (how much would they remember about you? do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

he works really hard to remember everything! he listens very carefully to you, so it’s not too hard to pick up on things you might like when you mention them in passing

(he’ll normally incorporate those into acts of service, too! if you offhandedly mention not wanting to go get your medicine the next day, you can bet it’ll be left on the table when you wake up)

r = remember (what is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

the day he proposed! he worked really hard for it to be perfect, and to see it went well makes him go ^^^^^

s = security (how protective are they? how would they protect you? how would they like to be protected?)

he’s pretty protective, but not to the point of being overbearing! he’s scared of losing more people he cares about fuck you chapter 179

when fighting demons, he would give you space to fight but also keeps an eye on you to make sure nothing happens.

t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

he puts in so much effort. he really wants to make sure you know how much he loves you, so he always puts effort into little things like everyday tasks! like i said in q, he listens to you very carefully which can help him make really nice gifts!

he also makes sure he never forgets something like your birthday or an anniversary, as he knows that it would hurt.

u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)

NONE HE IS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT AND I WANT HIM TO HAVE A GOOD LIFE

v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

pretty much not at all! besides making sure he looks clean, he’s proud of not having self esteem issues in that regard.

w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

in a way? he really doesn’t like the idea of depending so much on someone, especially since if something happened he wouldn’t know what to do. he has nezuko and the others, so if something were to happen to you he would be able to heal. (it doesn’t mean it would hurt any less, however.)

x = xtra (a random headcanon for them.)

he loves singing! i know that it’s canon he’s a shitty singer, but shhh he’s good at it

he definitely used to sing his siblings to sleep, so if you ask him to he won’t hesitate :((( crying

y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

he would really want a respectful s/o. it means a lot and it helps take some stress of his shoulders when he knows he doesn’t have to constantly correct you like inosuke LMAO

z = zzz (what are some sleep habits of theirs?)

if he’s not cuddling you, he really likes holding your hand when you sleep!!! it’s makes him feel really comfortable.

when he’s on missions, he’s a vv light sleeper, but whenever he’s with you somewhere safe he sleeps a lot better!!

#i love tanjirou so much goodnight #this one took a lot less longer than the zen one for some reason??#my work #tanjiro kamado x reader #tanjirou kamado x reader #kny x reader #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer sfw alphabet #kny #tanjiro x reader #tanjirou x reader #demon slayer alphabet #kny alphabet #kny sfw alphabet #tanjirou kamado

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constellaj · 3 years

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I do adore your gay Lucky in Love rewrite. But I do wonder how you do a rewrite within the actual episode. Such as Dash's POV of the water park shenanigans (I'm convinced that that the water guns are filled with soda, to get the sprayie sticky) and Dash's POV of the "We're dating now!" hallway moment (maybe Kawn can ask Dash if he's okay) and begrudgingly acknowledging that "Paulina" likes Danny (the look on Dash's face and the "jerk, I mean pal")

I would say that the thing that ought to be redone in Lucky in Love is the characters motivations, for nearly all of them at points in the episode.

I do not buy that Johnny would have wondering eyes when he so devoted to Kitty, and the whole "to make the ex jealous" is a lame trope and Kitty was way to affectionate to Danny for that. I would buy that moving from the ghost zone to the real world is stressful adjustment (hiding from the Fenton ghost hunters and such) could inspire fights and they break-up. And Kitty tries to be on her own for awhile but doesn't know how to handle that, and gets re-bound feelings for the only other eligible ghost-boy around (which Shadow catches wind of which makes him furious and he tries to kill Danny before Kitty make "horrible mistake"). Kitty should have purposefully picked Paulina to possess because she's a high-profile girl who Danny is already crushing on and mean enough to "not deserve" to be in control. And when Danny finds out the truth, I think Kitty could have added the threat of physically hurting if he didn't comply (such as I like Kitty, she has zero qualms about completely taking over others girls lives and expending them, which is scary).

The A-list being a literal exclusive club with limited members is too dumb to be silly. But friend groups splintering and shifting due to one or more friends changing, or when newly-dating teens unintentionally neglect their friendships, is something I do buy. Dash could be so livid about his best-female-friend suddenly and inexplicably dating his crush that he becomes unbearable to be around even for Kwan, who might want to try to make new friends, and give Sam and Tucker a try.

As for Danny, when he found out that Paulina was being possessed by a girl ghost the whole time, it seemed that his initial concern was getting Paulina back in control of her own body, which is the correct response. But then it shifted to him feeling "suffocated" by Kitty. His discomfort should have stayed on the fact that Paulina was being dated against her will, which should make Danny feel sick with guilt.

This turned out longer than expected. You can pick and choose what to respond to if at all.

----

(tl;dr for anyone who doesn’t know my lucky-in-love-but-gay rewrite:

Johnny and Kitty are taking a couples’ break, and Shadow, who feeds on romance, is whining like a spoiled dog about it. Shadow goes to find another hopeless romantic to possess to eat up love, and encounters Dash watching the romance channel. Dash gets more and more flirtatious, ghostly, and adopts a biker aesthetic as Shadow pulls at his emotions; not fully possessing him, but amplifying his feelings. Shenanigans ensue when Dash can’t decide if he has a bigger crush on Phantom or Fenton. Danny has to find a way to get Shadow out of Dash before Dash becomes reliant on him. Kitty needs to get Shadow back because, if Johnny doesn’t have Shadow, he becomes much more vulnerable.

biker dash art / full ep post)

this is all super fucking inch resting and im publishing this so the rest of the world can see but like generally speaking i think lucky in love is a shit fucking episode all around and it really can’t be saved. johnny and kittys dynamic is so petty and so inherently “Haha i hate my wife right boomers” that I cannot accept it as a way anyone would actually act and for that I don’t think the episode could ever really be “good.” I like to think of johnny and kitty as hapless mushy lovebirds. their only ‘couple fights’ are saying things like

{ID: a discord script I had with @crystalfloe. it reads: Johnny: Well what do you want me to DO? You know you’re at fault too here- what about all those road trips huh, constant road trips with you snuggling me from behind?

Kitty, scowling: You gave me a BLACK ROSE on my birthday, you KNOW that’s my favorite color!

Johnny: Yeah, you got me the EXACT part I was wanting for my bike even though I only said the name once! You just REMEMBERED!

Danny: Woah hey let’s not fight here.... does this count as fighting?

Kitty: YOU spent the entire day I was sick making me food even though you had a BOYS NIGHT planned!

Johnny: YOU’RE just a BEAUTIFUL LOVING PERFECT PERSON! And now Shadow’s a glutton for ROMANCE!

Kitty: Well maybe if YOU weren’t so SELF SACRIFICIAL and full of UNBRIDLED CARE AND INTIMACY he WOULDN’T BE!

Johnny: How DARE you say I’m the more loving one and therefore the PROBLEM-

Kitty: I’m really starting to hate you and your CUTE FACE, Johnny!

Johnny: Yeah- well, I’m starting to get real sick of your adorable EYES, Kitty!

End ID.}

If you want to rewrite Lucky in Love, to me, you have two options: absolutely decimate canon, or work within it. Decimating canon (ie, making Dash gay) comes with also deconstructing Johnny and Kitty’s toxic relationship into something actually worth rooting for, which in turn unravels the entire episode because the premise is... it’s a bad relationship. If you want to work within canon, the episode as is is pretty much the best you can get, because no way in hell would they let Dash be gay in canon.

While your takes are interesting, it’s not the kind of media I personally would like; the whole “Kitty could have added the threat of physically hurting if he didn't comply“ doesn’t sit well with me at all, so I can’t say it’s something I would ever engage with, personally.

Also, I don’t need canon to be 100% serious all the time, personally I love the bit about the A-Listers having a formal club with like, paperwork and stuff, it’s genuinely funny and also provides a nice clean-cut metaphor for how Danny as an “unpopular” kid might view the way the popular kids work. I don’t think the writers thought that was actually how popular kids work, I think they were playing with it and expanding on how a kid might see it.

You’re right that the focus of the episode should have been on Paulina’s bodily autonomy, which I think the OG was lacking in even as is because we didn’t get anything from Paulina’s POV; she’s treated more as a prop than a person, which, yikes.

But in summary, while this is interesting, none of it is how I would rewrite lucky in love if given the chance; if canon-divergent, I’d probably tweak the biker dash concept; if canon-compliant, I’d try to make it more of a jokey episode, maybe making the conflict between Kitty and Johnny a “I have to get him a secret birthday present without him knowing” instead of a “I am going to make him jealous by cheating on him.”

#danny phantom #ask #unsure-sincerity #adpRewrite

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laterzgators · 4 years

Text

How the gang would be like in modern times.

Kinda basing this off of texts I have with my friends because I get reminding everyday that my old friend group (kinda still my friend group.) are like the gang.

————

Ponyboy

He would have like an iPhone 6 in 2020. And he would be so upset about it. But he wouldn’t complain cause his brother didn’t have money for him to have an iPhone 11 or something.

He uses every platform to text. He probably only texts like Johnny and sometimes Dally.

Johnny and him would FT for hours and during them be like “look what I sent you.” And then proceeded to a meme.

Still a whiny baby boy but 2020 edition

Didn’t pay attention to politics cause he isn’t voting so he has no say. :/

Would probably watch anime- but like mainstream.

Has two instagram accounts one for public people he knew and a secret one to post what he wanted cause Darry probably looked into his phone-

Tries to show Darry how to use a smartphone. Darry won’t understand it. But he tried.

Track team until COVID hit 🙄

Hated virtual learning. HATED IT.

Especially when Darry didn’t have work that day he would peep into Soda and Pony’s room to see him on his desk on a call.

Pony putting his arm down shooing him away. “Darry...I’m in class please shh.” “Don’t worry bout me I’m just listening. Making sure these teachers actually are teaching ya.”

Somehow went brain dumb with this type of learning some days so when a teacher would ask him to answer something he would mute and turn off the camera or leave the call.

He was happy when he did know the answer a certain day.

• Having to text Johnny or Two bit to join a class cause the teacher was doing attendance.

—

Johnny

Texts Ponyboy and Dally pretty evenly. Though Pony would start being whiny when he didn’t answer. Johnny also probably had an older phone like an iPhone 6 or se maybe even an LG but he wouldn’t complain. He was just fine with having a phone. At least it worked.

Has a whole Instagram account about memes. Pony probably helps manage it.

Watches anime with Pony cause he finds it interesting. Does he understand what’s going on? No not at all but if Pony likes it then it’s okay.

Does really like Naruto though-

He hates school. It’s bad enough he skipped it most days. But now ITS AT HOME SO HE HAD NO EXCUSE TO NOT DO IT!

He would usually join the zoom calls but he kept his camera off and was on mute. His parents were probably arguing-

Some days he could be with Pony at his house and did his zooms from there.

Pony spamming him to join the class.

Pony: “Johnny Mr Fullb-“

Johnny: “I’m about to join just be patient pony.”

Dally sent him a nude once and he was SCARED. Dally used social media for that purpose but we will get more into that later-

He apologized a lot btw-

FT calls were fun cause he would put his phone in a certain position and do work and Pony being high on adrenaline would run around his room and you could see it on camera. It was funny.

—

Dallas

Where do I even start for this man....

TAKES FREAKING A MILLION NUDES LIKE IM NOT EVEN KIDDING ITS GROSS

Poor Johnny once got sent one on accident.

He is still traumatized

Virtual women and real women double bonus for him. He would text or dm one chick and be asking a girls number physically at the same time.

Mans gotta multitask-

Bully people on the internet.

Mainly pony for some reason. He did it playfully but Pony would get upset so quickly-

Pony.boy_curtis posted a picture. Caption: Read this poem at school and I’ve been vibing with it.

Comments: @Dal_winSton: Haha THATS dumb. (And more spam of him that includes 😀 that emoji.)

People would call him an eboy and he didn’t like that. He was just edgy in his own way.

Stole a iPhone 11 Pro so that’s how he has this phone.

GC with the whole gang existence and he was like “This is dumb we see eachother everyday.”

He was a weird teen-

—

Sodapop

My manz always texted Ponyboy when he was to lazy to speak.

Texted a lot of people cause he was that guy. But mainly Steve, Sandy (when they were still a thing.), Darry, and Pony.

His IG was filled with nice pics of him and girls just commenting about how handsome he was. He got annoyed of it at a point and turned off the comment section.

Probably had tiktok and made Pony get it.

Had a free subscription of Spotify and my boy loved his music.

Texting pony is like.: “Hey could you tell Darry that I got the eggs he needed earlier.” Pony never told him. Darry got home with a carton of eggs and started yelling that they wasted money on extra eggs. And Pony stood there after hours of finally looking at the text and would just back up.

Random girls dming asking if he was single.

It made him uncomfortable.

But Steve would grab his phone and say random things to the girls and they’d leave him alone.

He didn’t understand Pony’s memes but liked them cause they were on his page.

He or Darry probably asked later on what it meant.

“Uh-huh.” Is the response after Pony took an hour explaining it.

Still didn’t get it.

Followed every single person he knew or liked on Instagram or any platform.

“PONY CAN I USE YOUR HOTSPOT MY INTERNET ISNT WORKING!!!”

Pony just yelled back sure.

—

Darry

You thought Soda was bad nah Darry is a full on Karen-

Had probably had a flip phone until 2018

Loved Karen memes. Pony would see him liking them on fb and he’d just LAUGH.

Yelling at Pony to help him with his phone.

Pressed the wrong buttons all the time.

Probably had an LG-

DIDNT get texting 🤦‍♀️

Telling Pony not to talk to strangers on the internet.

Would have Rants on Facebook.

He pays for cable even though no one in that house used the Tv except him.

Would be so confused on the GC

“IF YOU ARE GONNA GO OUT WITH JOHNNY PUT ON YOUR MASK PONY!”

In the GC: Two Bit: Calm down Jamal dont pull out the nine.

Darry: Who is Jamal and what do you mean by pull out the nine??

Pony: PFT- CHILE I-

Darry: WAIT I SEARCHED IT UP IN THE GOOGLE DO NOT SAY INAPPROPRIATE THINGS IN THIS CHAT TWO BIT MATTHEWS!!!

It’s scary seeing him in our times-

—

Two Bit Matthews.

MEME LORD

All the memes all the jokes he understands it.

He is an intellectual.

Was barley passing school. He was usually on his phone in class.

He probably also had tiktok.

Dmed girls all the timeeee-

Hey good looking

You have been blocked by this user

WHA-

Yeah he didn’t realize girls didn’t like that

Had a whole page dedicated to memes because obviously.

DIDNT join virtual school at allllll

He was busy playing roblox like the cool kid he was.

He is legit a 9 year old-

Hated wearing masks but he did it.

Still hung out with Pony and the gang even with Corona.

He spammed the GC at like 4 a.m when he was super sleepy but still awake and asked all kinds of questions.

“If we call an orange orange can we call orange fruit?” Confusion.

He was something else-

—

Steve

Texted Soda during work.

Also texted Evie during work.

Google was his new best friend.

He used google a lot he just did.

Only had Instagram cause Sodapop begged.

He got used to it after a while.

Would get Ponyboy in trouble whenever he posted something that he knew could get him in trouble

Would post pictures of Darry doing random things and say “Superman” in the caption. LOL

Used LMAO a lottt for some reason

On the GC if someone was spamming he’d just say SHUT UP. Like a lot but he would.

He never wore his mask and if he did it was on his chin.

Pictures of chocolate cake.

That’s probably it lol.

——

That’s all. I hoped you liked it. Sorry I’m posting so late lol-

#80s movies #the outsiders #ponyboy curtis #johnny cade #dallas winston #darry curtis #sodapop curtis #steve randle #two bit mathews #johnny cade headcanons #dallas winston headcanons #se hinton

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dolliedarlin · 3 years

Note

hi!! how have you been?? how’s school?? i hope you’ve had a good weekend!!

im sorry it’s been so long since you’ve last heard from me! life has been very busy lately and i’m just now able to sit down and give you a life update lol.

i’ve spent the last week working every day and in my free time, i have been doing homework and procrastinating 😅 but i’ve been getting things done and being productive (even on slow days lol) so i keep telling myself to just keep doing my best and it’ll all work out!

i have started my book! i have read about 2 chapters of it as i’ve been unable to actually sit down and read at all this week and when i’ve had a chance i’ve been so tired i haven’t wanted to. hbu? have you had the chance to read any books lately?

my girls weekend went pretty well, on the downside however, we did hit a deer and it completely busted up my friends’ windshield so we had to find a ride back fo where we were staying and then a ride back home 😅 on the brighter side, her windshield should be fixed by next week, and we watched movies and ate ice cream lol. i also got to see the person that i still have feelings for, as they helped give us a tour around our friends college campus and they even picked her up from where we were staying to bring her back to school :)

overall i’ve been doing alright, i’m just very tired and busy lol, but i can’t wait to hear back from you!! :))

hello, my love! it's so great hearing from you! and don't worry about any sort of lateness, i can understand from all the times we've chatted that you're a busy bee that works hard and always does her best - i don't even register the time that's past since i'm just as busy on my own

university is hectic as usual, as soon as i find room to breathe, i have another deadline set, it's kinda funny but also pretty exhausting. i have a dissection guide due this thursday, wish me luck on completing it on time. but i'm looking forward to going home for this coming weekend as it's my dad's birthday ^7^ - he won't tell me how old he's turning...typical XD

but i've had a pretty good weekend as i went to another city for some Jollibee! it was so yummy! it felt great tasting my childhood again after such a long time. i just had a lot of committee work to do because of all the social events happening in my society and we don't really have an assigned event coordinator so liaising all the event details for an social media post are pretty hectic.

goodness, when i say you're a busy bee, you're truly a busy bee! make sure you continue taking care of yourself and your wellbeing, both, mental and physical alright, dollface?

i hope more time comes to you so you can really indulge in those beautiful pages! currently, i've been reading the 7 habits of highly effective people - it's really interesting but, just like you, i've found it hard to find enough time to really sit down and read it lately.

oh my gosh! what an experience, are you and your friends alright? how's the deer? at least you got to watch movies and eat ice cream, that's a vibe that i would regularly enjoy if i had the leisure time to XD and that's sweet, the person you like sounds like such a wonderful person, almost as wonderful as you - but you can never be beat in my eyes ;3

haha! we're too similar, us two, i'm much the same as you, busy and tired, sometimes losing sleep but prioritising hydration as it's getting colder out now that it's winter. oh! semi-good news, i was supposed to do work yesterday but i ended up just playing pokemon sword XD lol i felt like i needed it though - that burn out feeling weighs a little less on my shoulders ; i highly recommend taking time to do something you enjoy doing in between all that busy-ness makes everything less hard to get through <3

can't wait to hear from you soon!

all my love x

#love; dollie

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qwhlz · 3 years

Text

Bakugou X Reader

Okay, well, I wrote this a while ago, so I'm posting it as my first post haha. Um. Ok here are the TW so if you're not comfortable please don't read!

Also, please read until the end :D it gets better

I was listening to this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ~

Tw: slight smut, fluff, described violence (mineta yk), coronavirus

"So everyone stays inside, no going to the grocery store, the food will get transported every week. The school will be off until health is guaranteed. Understood?" Aizawa sternly announced over Iida's phone as everyone in the UA 1A dorms stood around it, in the common area.

There had been a deadly virus spread, and they called it Covid 19, or Corona.

No one really understood how the fuck this virus started, more so why the most infected was Asia, but they understood the rules they were given.

"Yes sensei. Thank you for telling us. Have a good night." Iida answered as he hung up. It was currently around 7 PM, so most of the students were in either PJ's or workout clothes (khm Kiri).

"What the fuck?!" Bakugou yelled as he rubbed his eye. He was about to go to bed, actually, so this was pretty annoying. I mean, they're under literal house arrest. How the fuck are heroes supposed to act?

"Well, everyone heard Aizawa sensei. You can keep doing whatever you were doing, just no going outside. As long as we're inside, everyone will be okay." Iida said as he quickly bowed to everyone, leaving to go to his room.

"Sounds kind of made up, don't you think?" Denki said as he fell on the couch, his head falling on Sero's lap.

"Kind of," Mina said as she sat down next to him, putting his sprawled out feet on her lap.

"Everyone inside at all times. Girls. This is heaven." Mineta mumbled as he drooled next to the table in between the two couches, before getting a kick to the face that sent him flying to the other side of the room.

"Shut the fuck up you perverted asswipe," Y/n said as she sat down next to Mina, resting the back of her head on her shoulder as she opened her phone, going on social media to check if this virus is actually real. Which, if it was, concerned her a lot. The crimes are definitely gonna go up and isn't this the perfect opportunity for the LOV to attack, AGAIN?

"Thanks, babes." Mina said as she pat Y/n head, earning a tiny smile.

"Yup, it's real. Twitter is swarming with it." Y/n added, answering Denki's earlier question. By now, everyone was either on the couches or the floor in front of the couches.

"Damn, lemme see," Denki answered as he put his arm out, palm open as he quickly made a grabbing motion.

Y/n went to hand it to him, but it got snatched away by the angry blonde she always kind of adored. He was mean, but have you seen him blush? It was the cutest thing in the world.

He scanned the phone as he scrolled down, reading a load of media bullshit before his eyes widened, groaning. He threw the phone back at Y/n, which ended up hitting her flat on the face. "Ow." She said bored as she scanned her phone, seeing a random, and obviously photoshopped, Kamui woods nude. She laughed as she showed the poorly edited picture to Mina, who also laughed.

"What the fucks wrong with you," Bakugou mumbled as he rubbed his eyes with his thumb and index finger.

Y/n shrugged as she hid the photo, before handing the phone to Denki like she originally planned. He read over the news, sighing as he handed her back the phone with a black phone case on it.

"How stupid," Denki added as he snugged his head into Sero's lap.

"Whatever. Im gonna go to my room. Goodnight to all the bad bitches and Mineta. No, actually, fuck you, Mineta." Y/n said as she stood up, Kissing Mina's cheek.

People mumbled goodnight as she walked to the elevator, feeling the sensation of being followed. She glanced behind her, seeing the angry blonde as she smirked to herself, before regaining her composure. She favored him more than Mina, which was pretty weird.

"Sleepy?" She asked with a smirk as the two of them walked into the elevator, both with their hands deep into their pockets. She pulled one hand out, clicking the number for the 4th floor. They had actually gotten much closer ever since the summer training camp incident. Bakugou actually had a lot of PTSD and nightmares, resulting in serious panic attacks in the middle of the night, as well as the middle of the day, and since he knew Y/n used to go through it too, he somehow got forced to tell her. Y/n was glad he did because he was able to text or call her whenever he had one of them, making her always be there to help. She never asked for anything in return, which Bakugou found weird. He wondered why, anyone really, would want to help him without asking for something in return. He was also really weirded out by the fact that she was awake at 5 AM every other night.

"Tch, shut up. At least I sleep." He answered as he leaned on the glass wall of the elevator. The glass was clear, but thick, for safety and family-friendly reasons.

"Oh shut up. It's not my fault I have insomnia." She averted her eyes as he furrowed her brows a bit. She had insomnia ever since Bakugou got kidnapped. She had actually really liked his personality, meaning she liked him. Not in a romantic way though. (Yet)

Once she saw him get taken before her eyes, it was the only thing she saw when she fell asleep, as well as worst-case scenarios. So, she gave up on trying to sleep. Once he was safely returned, she expected everything to go back to normal, but it didn't. She even tried taking melatonin, but it didn't help. So, over time, she developed small purple eye bags. Nothing too serious, but everyone knew she had insomnia. And why. Except for Bakugou. She asked everyone nicely (which wasn't her best trait) not to tell him, so he doesn't feel guilty. Even though he would deny it, she knew he would feel that way at one point.

The elevator let out a ding as the doors opened, letting them exit as they both went the same direction. Since Y/n wasn't allowed to live in the dorms at first, and most of the rooms were taken, they put her on the boys side, the fourth floor, far far away from Mineta. Y/n was actually caught beating the shit out of him 2 times behind the school. Well, she did it more than 2 times. That was only when they caught her. To be frank, Mineta annoyed and frustrated her to no ends, and the fact that he didn't even bother stopping after being beaten up multiple times, says something. Yes, that was a bit violent, but sexual harassment was not a joke. At least not to her. She would've been suspended, but then they'd have to suspend Mineta as well, which wasn't their top priority. Not that he favored him or anything, and by he I mean Aizawa, he actually hated the little shit, but he couldn't admit that to anyone. Mineta was still a student.

She opened her door as Bakugou took a couple more steps, opening the door right next to hers. "Good night B. Call me if anything happens, okay?" She asked seriously as she smiled at him.

"Tch." Bakugou retorted as he nodded his head, barely, but she noticed as she smiled before going in.

Bakugou was really grateful for Y/n. Not that he'd even admit it to, even himself, but he actually was. She was one of the blunter and mean people in the class, except for those she liked, so he felt like someone actually cared. Everyone else was way too nice. And, to be real, he actually admired that. She always told the truth, no matter how harsh it was, but if it was to someone she liked, her words were more gentle. She wasn't a person to lie to either. Every time, anyone really, lied to her, she knew. It was like an instinct. She was really special. To think someone random he met would comfort him and try more than his own mother is unimaginable. She never lost her temper around him, and if she did, she would smile as leave for a minute to cool off. The scary thing about her was, she knows how to control her emotions. She knows exactly what to say every time. She knows self-control better than anyone.

Bakugou sighed as he stepped into his room, taking his shirt off as he went to his closet, taking out towels, pajamas, and his toothbrush and toothpaste. Bakugou liked to go to sleep early since he was disciplined, but he also liked to hope that would make his nightmares go away. He hated his PTSD. It was his worst enemy. Worse than any villain. He felt like he was weak. Not his body, but his mind. Like he was too weak to take one traumatic experience, when people had many.

Y/n set her phone on her bed as she took her pajamas and towels, as well as her hygiene stuff. Her room was pretty clean, some random clothes were thrown around, but the rest was pretty nice. Her bed had pretty, white sheets, some faint stains on them, and it was in the corner of her room. Next to that was a balcony, and then her closet. The rest of it was just random decorations and paintings she made and liked.

She left her room at the same time as Bakugou as she looked at him, smiling before waiting for him so they walk to the showers together. He rolled his eyes playfully as he tried his best not to smile. "Wanna shower together?" She said as she winked at the slightly taller boy, whose face erupted into a blushing ness at her comment making her chuckle. "Shut the fuck up." Bakugou mumbled as they stepped into the elevator, which was surprisingly still there, clicking on the first-floor button.

"If that pervert tries anything, tell me." He said as he tried to start a conversation, barely think about his words.

"Pft, why? I beat him up multiple times. At this point, I know all his weak spots and how not to leave marks." She smirked as she nudged Bakugou's shoulder with her elbow, before resting her head on it. "But thank you for worrying. I appreciate it." She said as she softly smiled. The elevator seemed to move slower as Bakugou's heartbeat increased. Every time they made physical contact, he'd get flustered. It kind of made him annoyed that his body could give in so easily.

"Do you want me to sleep in your dorm tonight?" She asked as she glanced up at him, still leaning on his bare shoulder.

Bakugou shook his head no, as the doors opened, causing her to pull herself away from him and walk out together.

Y/n and Bakugou were known as best friends around the class. Even Aizawa knew it. He also knew about Bakugou's nightmares, hence he let Y/n sleepover in Bakugou's room anytime she wants. Aizawa, as well as the rest of the class, knew that she was the only one able to calm him down in said situations. Some girls were jealous since Bakugou had a soft spot for her, but she never used that to her advantage.

Y/n waved, wiggling her fingers as they went separate ways, each into the bathroom of their gender.

Y/n set her stuff down as she stepped into a shower, turning on the water as she did her hygiene, as well as washing her body and hair. Once she was done, she put her PJ's on and brushed her teeth after.

Y/n turned her body as she went to leave the bathroom, but her knee hit something. Y/n looked down, spotting the familiar purple sex offender in front of her, smirking with only underwear on.

Y/n groaned as she tilted her head back, rolling her eyes.

"Hey, sexy." He said with a lisp as he walked into the girl's bathroom, closing the door.

Y/n looked at him, already knowing what he was going to fail at trying, so she played along. Y/n smirked as she leaned over, locking the door behind him, before going back, crouching down to his height. She was still smirking, which somehow only made Mineta horny, instead of alarmed.

"Okay. I guess I was playing hard to get. Come here." She smiled as she stood up, walking further away from the door. Mineta's eyes widened as he jogged up to her, placing his hands on her hips. It took every muscle in her body not to puke, but she managed to keep calm.

"But I'm more into tying." She said as she took one of the towels the girls used to clean the floors, putting it around the gremlin's eyes. He was smirking hard as Y/n noticed a tiny thing sticking out of his pants.

"Oh, you naughty girl." He said as he allowed her to tie him up completely, hands and ankles involved.

After she was done, Y/n stood up, chuckling.

"Did you really think I was going to fuck you?" She laughed as she picked him up by the hem of his shirt easily, walking over to the door, ignoring his voice filled with confusion.

"This is the last time I beat you up. If there's a next time, you won't make it out alive. I don't care if Im suspended or expelled for committing murder, as long as you're dead." She said slyly in his ear as she slammed his face into the tiles on the wall, earning a cry and groan from him. She actually held back a lot. She could've broken his skull with that hit, but she held back. His nose wasn't even

broken.

"Y/n? What the fuck was that? Are you okay?" Bakugous voice asked roughly from the other side as the doorknob jiggled. Y/n was still smirking as she scanned Mineta's bloody nose. She unlocked the door as she looked at Bakugou with an innocent smile. "I'm okay. He just tried to do something with me, that's all." She said as she stepped out to see a very angry Bakugou glaring at Mineta in Y/n's hand.

Bakugou went to jump on him, and probably kill him, but Y/n put a hand on his chest, gently pushing him back as she kissed his cheek. "It's okay now. You can go to bed." She smiled as she left, entering the common room, earning a few confused looks from students that were still in there.

"Uh, Y/n. What are you doing?" Denki asked as he scanned the bloody and tied up Mineta, furrowing his brows as Mina laughed next to him.

"Oh, nothing, just my usual nightly activities. Sero, could you help me?" She asked as she smiled at Sero who looked at her concerned.

"Uh, sure? What's up?" He asked as he stood up, walking over to her, ignoring Mineta's yells. "Just some tape. Thank you." She said as she smiled at him. Sero reluctantly shot some tape out, ripping it as he handed it to her, earning a kiss on the cheek.

Y/n walked up to in front of the common room TV as she took a chair, ignoring everyone's stares as she taped Mineta up to the wall above the TV. "If anyone takes him down before the morning you come to talk to me okay?" She said as she looked at everyone who nodded, before she smiled, bowing. "Thank you." She said as she left the common room, taking Bakugou's hand as they walked back to the elevator. Bakugou's hair was damp, the ends of his spikes tilting downwards as she smiled, ruffling his hair.

"What did he do?" Bakugou asked, almost in a growl as she cracked his knuckles. Y/n put her hands over Bakugou's, stopping the cracking. "Don't crack your fingers. It's bad for your joints." She said as they went into the elevator.

* * *

It was around 3:26 AM, and Y/n was in her dorm, eating ice cream and watching TikTok. She chuckled at a random video as she scrolled, eating a spoonful of chocolate ice cream. As she went to take another bite, she heard two knocks on the wall behind her head. Her head shot up as she set her phone down, carrying her pint of ice cream as she quietly left her room, opening Bakugou's door as she went inside, locking it behind her.

In front of her, on his bed, was the same scene she had been seeing almost every night. Bakugou, red puffy eyes, and cheeks, sitting leaned onto the wall, on the other side of which was Y/n's bed, with his arms hugging his knees.

Y/n sighed as she took the spoon out of her mouth, walking over to Bakugou as she set the ice cream next to her, cupping his cheeks as she made him look into her eyes.

"It's okay my love. It's okay." She whispered as she pushed his knees down, straightening them as she sat on his upper thighs, hugging him tightly. Y/n started calling him the nickname a while ago, so it wasn't weird to either of them. He actually found it very comforting. And she was just happy to be able to help and connect. Well, maybe she needed some reassuring as well.

Bakugou squeezed her tight with his arms wrapped around her waist, intertwining with each other. He sobbed into her shoulder as he shook, making the girl sigh. She hated that he had to go through this, but it had gotten better. He used to have nightmares even when napping but after some reassurance from Y/n, it had gotten better. Y/n's goal was to just get him to feel good again. No nightmares. He refused to go to therapy, so Y/n started researching and going to a therapist herself to learn how to help him. It wasn't the best, but she tried.

"I know. Focus on my breathing okay? On my heartbeat." She mumbled as she started balancing her breathing, hoping he'd follow along, which he thankfully did. Bakugou inhaled, shaking, as he tried to follow her breathing, trying his best. Since Y/n and Bakugou were room to room, they both put their beds on the same side of the wall connecting them and using a knocking technique to decipher. 1 knock meant a flashback. 2 knocks were a nightmare. And 3 knocks was a full-on panic attack. Bakugou rarely ever used three knocks, even though he had panic attacks more than nightmares, but he wanted not to be seen as weak. He thought that she had already seen him in such a weak state, she didn't need to think he was even more of a crybaby.

Once Bakugou managed to calm down a bit, she pulled back, still hugging him as she put her forehead on his. She looked into his piercing red eyes as she blinked slowly, smiling at him. Bakugou's view went to her lips for a second, before quickly returning back to her eyes. Y/n smiled surprised. He had done that a couple of times, but she always ignored it, thinking he just didn't want eye contact. But, this time, he started leaning in slowly. At first, she didn't notice it, but when she did, she looked at his eyes. He looked back as he blinked a couple of times, finally closing the gap as he kissed her gently. It wasn't a french kiss or anything. More like a long peck. Both of their eyes closed as they kissed before Bakugou pulled back. Y/n chuckled as she raised her hand, putting it in his hair. "Didn't think you had the balls for that." She whispered as she smiled at him. His brows furrowed as he made a tch noise before kissing her again, this time a bit more passionately.

Y/n kissed back as she smiled into the kiss. She had never thought he'd do this, and she could bet her life he'd regret it in the morning. This is just the heat of the moment, and she was sad that was all it was, but she had made peace with the fact that the only label Bakugou wanted, was the #1 hero. Not a boyfriend.

Y/n felt a warm sensation on her bottom lip as her eyes shot open, looking at Bakugou's closed ones. She felt a gentle tug on her hair as she opened her mouth slightly to protest, but he had already put his tongue in her mouth, twirling it around hers. Y/n blinked a couple of times before he pulled back, licking his lips after. "Do you have chocolate?" He asked as he looked at her confused.

Y/n rolled her eyes as she moved off of him, taking the pint of ice cream with a single spoon, setting it next to her as she sat to the right of him.

Bakugou's arms extended as he grabbed her hips, pulling her back onto his lap as she yelped quietly. He smirked at the small blush he could see in the moonlight as she rolled her eyes and picking the food up, taking a spoonful and putting it up to his mouth. Bakugou's mouth opened as he took the ice cream. Y/n went to have a spoon herself, but a hand snaked up to the nape of her neck as his arm pushed her lips back onto his, transferring some of the ice cream into her mouth with his tongue. Y/n's eyes widened as she pulled back, swallowing the ice cream and licking her lips as looked at him with a grimace. "Ew, you're disgusting!" She said as she chuckled, wiping her lips with the back of her hand.

Bakugou chuckled as well as he licked his lips, swallowing the treat in his mouth. "More." He said as he opened his mouth, motioning to the ice cream.

Y/n rolled her eyes as she took another spoon, putting it in his mouth as she moved her hips a bit to make herself comfortable, shifting her feet as well. Bakugou's eyes widened as he blinked, grabbing her hips roughly. "Don't. Move." He said as she furrowed her brows, before feeling something poke her from underneath. Her eyes widened as well as she looked down, before looking at Bakugou again, who aggressively swallowed whatever was left, groaning as he put his head in the crook of her neck. "This is all your fault." He mumbled into her shoulder as she blushed hard.

She did NOT expect that at all. She just wanted to comfort him at 4 am without thinking about getting railed, but here we are.

"So what the fuck do I do now." She whispered as she blushed even deeper, staring at the wall in front of her. This wasn't uncomfortable or anything, but it was quite awkward. She might have been a virgin, but she knew stuff. And she knew boners don't leave on their own.

"Ugh. Fuck." Bakugou groaned as he dug his head deeper into her neck. He was embarrassed, yes, but the thing that annoyed him was how he already knew what he wanted her to do. He could picture the whole scenario in his head, making him even harder. He really just hated himself right then.

"Um. So. I guess we're stuck." She said as she felt an itch on her inner thigh. "Oh no." She whispered as her eyes fell. How was she gonna explain this one.

"What." Bakugou mumbled as his voice was muffled from her hoodie. It was pure agony. But, he'd rather this happen with her than anyone else.

"Um. My thigh itches. Like...bad." She said as she gripped onto his shirt from the mix of horniness and itches. It was almost getting painful, so before Bakugou could answer, she moved her hips back and forth a couple of times as she felt his member poke harder. A small smirk made its way to her lips as she heard Bakugou's low groans. She knew exactly what she was doing, and she felt like she was in charge.

"Stop. Ugh, stop moving." He managed to groan out as he squeezed her hips tighter, resulting in a low moan from her. Both of their eyes widened as she blushed again, and Bakugou got even harder.

"Can. Can I just like. Ugh, it feels annoying saying it." She said as she put her head on top of his, wanting to disappear.

"Then. Ngh. Then just do it." He said as quickly as he could before she took a deep breath.

"Don't hate me in the morning." She whispered as she closed her eyes starting to slowly sway her hips back and forth. The thin biker shorts she was wearing were starting to get wet from her already soaked underwear, and he could feel it. Low groans escaped him as his breathing deepened. He never thought this would happen after a fucking panic attack, especially not in the middle of the night, but never say never I guess.

Only one thing was on Y/n's mind as she swayed a bit faster with every move. That was, how did I even get here? She never even wanted to lose her virginity in high school, and even though this technically wasn't it, she was sure this wasn't the only time it would happen. Whimpers left her slightly open mouth as she gripped her arms around his neck, the small sounds turning Bakugou even more as his brain just said 'fuck it'.

Bakugou swiftly turned the tables as Y/n was now kissing him, still in his lap, but pushed down a bit more. Her eyes widened slightly as she finally saw his red, sparkly eyes again. They were red from crying earlier and half-lidded, making him look even more attractive. He broke the kiss as his hand traveled up, behind her head, on the back of her neck as he hugged her again, stopping her movements.

She was confused. Was she doing anything wrong? Was he done? Is this what it's like? One way or another, she felt small kisses on her collar bone as her eyes were closed. Small bites and sucks were what Bakugou did to her collarbone, leaving tiny red hickeys. Once she realized what he was doing, she smiled as she pulled his head up. She smiled before kissing him as he stood up without warning, setting her on his bed next to him in a cuddling position. They were still facing each other as his hand was cupping her face as he looked her deep in the eye. "Go to sleep, my love." He mocked tiredly as he closed his eyes with a tiny grin, earning one from her.

"Fuck off." She mumbled as she rolled her eyes, placing her forehead on his. She hadnt expected any if this, but she was glad it happened. And, sure enough, she fell asleep. The funny thing is, Bakugou didn't have any other attacks that night.

#bakugou katsuki #mha bakugou #my hero academia #anime #boku no hero academia #bnha #bnha kirishima #mina ashido #Spotify

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palmett-hoes · 4 years

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Hi, I really loved your post with the monsters as Birds of Prey! Was wondering if you had any thoughts on the Foxes as Marvel or Mcu characters? I feel like I could see Dan as Carol Danvers and Andrew for sure is Jessica Jones, idk about the rest.

oh wow old post!!

haha unfortunately i’m not really a comics person so i don’t feel like i can really give the best analysis possible, but i have seen most of the mcu movies and bits and pieces of the netflix show so i’ll try my best. also im using dc characters too bc i want to

1. Dan: I think your instinct with Dan as Captain Marvel is spot-on (at least uhhh,, based on the movie lol sorry comics ppl). Her direct, forceful powers and fighting style are definitely reminiscent of dan’s no-nonsense leadership approach. similarly the themes of overcoming sexism and acceling in a male-dominated industry in the captain marvel movie is pretty much the same as dan’s story establishing herself as the first female exy captain (tho sports is way more valid than the military). plus there’s a lot of emphasis on love and friendship between women that dan is ALL about. also lashana lynch would be a god tier dan wilds fc. Dan could also def have that lawful good Okoye from Black Panther energy. Loyal, disciplined, no-nonsense leader. no powers except discipline. no hair. also danai gurira in 2012 with the dreads and the sword and the cape on TWD was definitely part of my middle school sexual awakening

2. Kevin: Aquaman. this is based pretty much exclusively on the fact that jason momoa is my #1 kevin fc and also that Pasifika kevin is phenomenal and mandatory, actually. otherwise i think he has a decent amount of stick-up-the-ass cyclops energy. or dick grayson nightwing energy but i don’t have any evidence for why. kinda looks like him tho

3. Andrew: andrew gets the most characters bc he’s my favorite. i think ur jessica jones instincts are absolutely correct, both in her storyline (i only watched the first season) and her powers. i’ve seen some powers au and the tendency seems to be giving andrew like,, psychic powers or the like, and i don’t really agree. andrew is a very direct character. he’s pragmatic, he confronts problems head on, and he doesn’t muck about in details. to me this really translates best into physical powers like super strength that help u big punch straight thru all ur problems. also i def think andrew would be not just a solo hero but a mercenary (or a detective) because he’s not altruistic enough to be a standard vigilante. he doesn’t care enough about other people to hang out on rooftops all night waiting for Crime to occur. there’s a price for that. which brings us to the NEXT andrew hero: deadpool. maybe in personality more of a drugged andrew but the superpowered mercenary is really a perfect fit for andrew. also, healing powers have a decidedly tragic poetry to them on andrew. already he’s self-destructive, if he had a healing factor his concern for his own well-being would be so beyond rock bottom it’d be in the earth’s core. even worse when you remember that with a healing factor, as opposed to indestructibility, you still feel all the pain. which brings us to Wolverine and X-23, who have the same thematic points as deadpool but are much more of a personality match and they have knife hands, which i really think andrew would appreciate. ending that sadness train and onto another tho, andrew’s aesthetic and Vibes fit the Winter Soldier just SO well (just that movie tho, not really civil war or anything past that) and a reinterpretation of the captain america story using the twinyards would be incredibly interesting. and finally, one last hero that would work really well for andrew: rogue, only remove the angst around not being able to touch people, andrew would love that. one touch and their comatose? baller. don't fucking touch him.

4. Matt: Shazam. I didn’t see the shazam movie but my dad and brother did and they said it was very funny and all the trailors looked like it had a lot of fun himbo energy and i really think that fits. in terms of matching himbo disaster energy i think i’ve heard good things about comics hawkeye (not mcu). thor?

5. Aaron: Mr. Fantastic. now this might be a stretch but aaron is a character who uses a skin-deep veneer of anger to cover the fact that he’s actually quite pliant and bends to other people’s wills. and he’s a doctor or w/e. he could alse be like,, antman. he’s smart right? hank pym not paul rudd. katelyn can be wasp

6. Seth: Arm Fall Off Boy. no i will not elaborate. ..... ugh fine, but i'm using my favorite piece of superhero media of all time: x-men evolution, the one where they're all teenagers in public high school. seth can be lance alvers/avalanche who’s a bit of a jerk and has a lot of issues with authority and has a rivalry with cyclops very reminiscent of seth with kevin, but still there’s the recurring theme that he’s lashing out because of low self-esteem and a bad situation and he’s a surprisingly sympathetic character who i’m very fond of. his power is earthquakes but i think the name makes that pretty self-explanatory

7. Allison: Iron Man. cocky, bitchy, and rich rich rich. sounds like allison to me. then to elevate it a level higher: emma frost, rich bitch extraordinaire. also if allison had telepathic powers she would be unstoppable. plus one more bitchy, morally-gray blonde (but chaotic this time): Harley Quinn

8. Nicky: Okay so I do wanna give a quick shout-out to Northstar, the first openly gay comicbook superhero, who’s a speedster which I’d actually say fits Nicky pretty well. However, if i had to choose a superhero to represent nicky in presence and powers it would have to be Jubilee from x-men (... from what i’ve heard lol. i’ve never actually consumed any of her Media hahaha anyway) she’s a joyful, energetic presence and her powers are setting off fireworks which i think is a good balance of nicky being a supportive cousin-parent AND a chaotic train wreck garbage trash man. also gonna throw in johnny storm for a cheap 'flaming' joke

9. Renee: Thunder/Blackbird from Black Lightning bc she’s a fufkin lesbian lol. (i don’t watch the show but i do follow nafessa williams’s tag). now the fr ones i’m gonna do together because to me they have the same Vibes so i chose them for the same reasons. Wonder Woman and Storm who to me have the same reserved, impartial, regal energy. honestly ethereal and somewhat otherwordly, and quite literally goddesses. also op as hell. black widow and her “red in my leger” looking for redemption story also fits thematically.

10. Neil: okay lazy answer first: the flash or quicksilver. get it? because they run fast? and neil run too? yea i like to think i've proven myself to be better than such a surface level interpretation but worth the mention ig. so for srs now, mystique and her shape changing powers would be an interesting interpretation of neil's identity issues, but i wanna push it a step further. nightcrawler would actually be possibly the MOST interesting hero to apply to neil 1. because powers still very movement go fast place to place 2. because of the thematic focus on neil's unusual looks and the lengths he goes to hide them, very much in line with the way nightcrawler will use a hologram-projector in order to look human, yet in both cases it's only a surface-level illusion, and 3. his parentage. here, mary would be mystique, which i also think works very well considering mary seemed to be the far more effective chameleon on the run than neil, and also fits with her place as a morally grey character, as mystique herself is often a villain or an antagonist, with her own agenda and shadowy motives. then nathan matches well with nightcrawler's father: azazel, a literal demon, and also where kurt gets his appearance. it's a shockingly coherent narrative between the three of them. then, to also give neil some powers that aren't contingent on his fucked up geneology and rather on his own merit and abilities, Black Canary and her sonic voice parallel the way that neil began to anchor his identity and take ownership over himself through his voice and his sick roasts

and 1 extra, wymack: batman, on account of his altruism, his dedication to second chances, and his many, many adopted children

---

anon, ik it's been a sec since you sent this, so i hope it gets back to you. i had a fun time with it and it prompted like,,, 7 different au s that i'll never write

#Anonymous #txt #the foxes #im talkin #my posts

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theycallmegothboy · 3 years

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1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!

FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? -spotify 2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess 3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey

4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers 14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size? -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao 39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy

40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear? -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao 49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car? -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18. 54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job? -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles? -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone? -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods? -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons? -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce? -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed? -wouldnt you like to know? ;)) 66. have you ever won a spelling bee? -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw? -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw? -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married? -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you? -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah 78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment 81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor? -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos? -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules. 84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier 85. what shirt are you wearing? -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high? -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk? -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate? -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter? -fall. fuck you 96. day or night? -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month? -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of? -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/

felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3

also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3

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mollydollyjournals · 3 years

Text

Monday 25th January; 156lbs

I didn't check my body composition today. I just stepped on the scales and left my phone in my bedroom, which means it doesn't send info to the app. So I know that I weigh a little less than the other day, but still way too much.

Toilet tmi again. Im still really constipated and it's actually just fucking painful. The biggest issue is it's not that I haven't been eating. I always try to eat reasonably high fiber (compared to my caloric intake anyway - 8-9g fiber a day isn't much for a normal 2000kcal diet, but it is for 800kcal) and if I need more then I have some particularly high fiber stuff like pulses. Fruit and veg is a good way to go. It's been 3-4 days now so I actually have been eating a bit more to try to make it happen, including higher fiber, but still nothing. I took some stimulant lax last night and still nothing. Had yogurt and coffee and still nothing.

I have this pain in my abdomen too. I suspected some internal bleeding last week or the week before so I'm sure something is up. Just I don't know what I should do about it. I don't want to go back to the doctor and ask them to investigate something else again. I think after my liver scan and blood tests came up fine they'll think I'm lying or exaggerating. I just don't know what's wrong with me. Is it an impaction? Do I have something constructing my intestines? An ulcer? I have really bad acid reflux too. It's like my digestive system is too full and it's just not emptying. My waist feels huge. It makes me actually scared to eat for physical reasons, because if it's not stimulating my gut to move like it should be, then all I'm doing is putting more pressure on my insides.

I'm currently drinking some osmotic lax, which is all I can do. It's what you're supposed to do for impaction. I bought it specifically because I've had these problems before and you're not meant to take stimulant lax, and sometimes it'll resolve itself but it can still be painful and also it'll take longer. Osmotic lax doesn't work fast though - you have to give it a few days. During those few days I'm just reabsorbing waste matter from my intestines. Its disgusting and unhealthy. And when it finally does work, I might have the opposite problem. In the past I've been reluctant to take lax for this because I've had instances where it acted kind of like...a plug. That once it's passed, everything else goes way too fast after it. Sorry that's gross. I guess if anyone wanted more motivation to eat properly it's so your digestive system doesn't get fucked up like this. I noticed a lot of mucus not long ago so maybe the regular mucus layer got stripped and hasn't replenished. Idk.

Other than that there is family drama happening with my brother who is currently in a psych ward and my stupid mother who thinks the sun shines directly out of his anus. My entire life she's treated him like her precious baby and I've just been secondary. Maybe because she associated him with my older brother who died. Who fucking knows. But they're stressing me the fuck out and pissing me off. I keep telling her what to do and what not to do, which I get from trying to properly research his conditions and others similar and from having dealt with her when she was in a psychotic episode, and she just doesn't. She thinks if she just talks nice and loves him enough he'll get better. As if that isn't the whole reason he's a spoiled piece of shit who thought he could take all the drugs with no consequences. This probably sounds very hypocritical from an alcoholic who has trouble not drinking even after physical health problems, but there's much more to it in my brother's case that I cba to go into.

The worst part is she gives him all the attention and understanding that I want and haven't had. I've spent the last few days feeling especially lonely and invisible. I've been talking about it a bit on social media and only a couple of friends responded. Hb came up to my room and saw me crying and basically acted like an awkward dad. Bf hasn't acknowledged much of what I've posted and we still haven't spoken directly. If not for those few friends I might have done something drastic. I don't know. I need to know if I'm actually liked loved and cared for. Missed at all. Lockdown has fucked with it so much and I already had trouble with it. I feel like I need to do something big to get attention. I could just be honest about my feeling like I want to kill myself and see who responds. But I've spoken about it before and people just kind of 'haha same' if that. I don't know if they realise that I'm genuinely close to doing something, or just don't care.

I do have borderline personality disorder and I'm so aware of the stigma. I don't want to be manipulative or abusive. I want people to want to be around me, not because I forced them. I'm so scared of being needy or annoying or overbearing or anything like that. And then if I do say something, I'm already feeling really bad and struggling a lot, so for it to be ignored hurts so much. That's why I end up drinking. I already have trouble seeing my friends post about their struggles and get so much support and love offered, when I get barely any. One of my best friends also has BPD but also everyone loves her. She has a successful small business doing what she loves, if I go anywhere with her strangers stop her and compliment her or ask to take her photo but pretend I don't exist or give me a passing smile. It's not that I don't think she deserves those things or love and support. It's just that I want it too. She's one of the few people who's reached out to me recently and I really appreciate it. I guess she knows how it feels. I just wish I wasn't so jealous.

So for my brother to start saying stuff in the family group chat and my mum to just start fawning over him and all that? Just the extra salt I really didn't need in my wounds. For one thing, I told her not to play into how he is because he'll feed off the drama. I know this because of who he is, that he really is an attention seeker, and that all 3 of us have a tendency to get caught up in things. My brother and I inherit our cluster B personality traits from her. I told her not to get into it and remain impartial. She didn't. I even messaged her and my dad separately and told them that I called the hospital and asked them to check on my brother, but she hasn't given me so much as a thank you.

She's up early for work and I sleep on Mars time, so my dad is still asleep. He'll probably say something when he gets up in a few hours. It all feels backwards. He was so abusive to me growing up. He was unnecessarily strict and horrible to me all the time and kicked me out and disowned me regularly. He tore down my entire sense of self and called me stupid and made sure I realised that if I wasn't doing well it was my own fault and I wasn't trying hard enough. But now he keeps a level head and we reconnected after years of not talking because my brother and mum both had a psychotic episode at the same time a few years ago. I hated him so much but now his approval and support is worth the most. But it's the same problem again - he seems to genuinely realise now that his overly authoritarian parenting was wrong. It's just how it is in a lot of African cultures, and his father was especially abusive, so he wasn't well equipped. He's doing things differently with my younger half brother. But why couldn't it have been me? Why didn't I get to have a nice dad who acknowledges his humanity? My half brother deserves it, but why couldn't I have that while I was growing up too?

It just makes me feel really abandoned. In every situation, there's always someone else who gets what I want, and I don't. I hate my brother so much. I feel like it'd be better if he was dead. But then my mum would spiral, and I'm not really that cold, so I phoned the hospital to talk to them and get them to check on him. Phone calls make me so nervous. I was shaking. Before the call, while I made the call, and for a long time afterwards. I didn't even get acknowledged.

I want a drink.

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talagirl · 3 years

Note

🌻🌻

i think like... i never really felt the full ache of not having good representation in media until recently

like i certainly understood how necessary it was in general, and was like 🙁😕😕 abt there not really being any persian people in media but i never felt the physical need (??? i feel like im phrasing this weird i mean this in context for myself) for it until i started rlly struggling with coming to terms with being autistic and what it means for me and the people around me

like.. ive talked abt this a lot on my priv twt but any time i think about telling my best friends irl about it i literally physically recoil. i know theyre good people and i know they love me for me but its still putting something out there that i cant take back, and will permanently colour their perspective on me and my actions

and thats why when i started looking for autistic characters in my current big interest, comics, it was just so so crushingly disappointing that theres basically nothing aside from a one-off panel of mr fantastic (whos middle name is literally GIANT FUCKING DOUCHEBAG i dont like that dude) saying hes """mildly autistic""", immediately following it with "oh yeah i'll figure out a cure for it by brunch! haha" LIKE....😭😭😭😭? anyways

dcau wally west (aka the flash) is the heart of his team.. hes childish and kinda gross at times but at heart hes just a guy who loves his friends and does his best for the people around him.. and the people around him love him so so so much in return (to the point where the league....... severely fell off the wagon without him)

superheroes are..role models. they may fuck up and they may be evil and universally reviled for a few arcs until the editors deemed that sales have picked up sufficiently, but in the end theyre a symbol of what we inherently want to be

(i feel like ive rambled for forever and never actually ended up getting to the point so let me cut to the chase ig)

I WISH SO FUCKING BAD THAT CHARACTERS LIKE THAT GOT TO BE AUTISTIC!!!! PEOPLE WHO ARE CAPABLE AND ADMIRED AND SURROUNDED BY LOVE DESPITE THEIR DIFFERENCES AND THE WAY THEY STICK OUT!!!!!! AND IT HURTS THAT THERE ARENT!!!!!!!!!

like i think.. i understood it in technical terms before but i GET IT now. like down to the bone

just like how little kids want to see themselves on screen, i wish i were able to see others struggling with these things without being mocked or minimized and eventually getting THROUGH IT and getting a happy ending

sorry this got long anyways yeah

#long post #idk what tags to use umm #long post /#whatever yeah thats the gist #inbox

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salamander-in-a-sock · 4 years

Text

get to know me more 🐝

i was tagged by Truffles @trufflesmushroom here we go

🐝 what do you prefer to be called name wise?

Danny >;)

🐝 when is your birthday?

12/30

🐝 where do you live?

Northeast Kansas in the middle of nowhere~

🐝 three things you are doing right now?

gotta finish tuning a vocaloid cover for a certain vocaloid who’s 10th anniversary is coming up :D! I’ve also been working on some drawings, including 1(one) last minute one for pride, and also crying because I broke one of my fav doll’s foot joints and haven’t tackled a repair yet :’(

🐝 four f*ndoms that have piqued your interest right now?

err I don’t really do fandom culture all too much LOL. As for communities I DO create content for and interact with: Vocaloid/vocal synth. I make covers, videos, and art and all that! I Also pop into the doll world once in a while, but i find it generally difficult to interact with people there, so most of the time i keep my doll Endeavours to myself (which isn't a bad thing!! I like having something i can relax and and have for just me 😏)

That's not 4, so here's some media I've been enjoying lately:

Animal Crossing! I honestly don't play video games often but im hooked! I've maxed out over half of my islander's friendship and got most of their picture frames. Kevin is my husband.

As usual, Silent Hill will always have its grip on me.

🐝 how is the pandemic treating you?

Lost my job because of it. Could be better

🐝 song you can’t stop listening right now?

I went back to "Do Vocaloids Dream of Doomsday Bird" by Sasakure.uk again. One of my fav albums of all time. Its 2010 baybee!! The track Wanderlast ft. Megurine Luka has always had an impact on me so I'll say that 💕

Also been listening to "John Frustrated" by ippo.tsk feat. Cyber Diva and Eleanor Forte on repeat. I'm not the biggest fan of Eleanor's unenthusiastic sounding voice in most uses of her, but the song itself is a bop. Go girl give us nothing (@ eleanor)! funny that she was one of the first vocal synths i used.

🐝 recommend a movie. The Descent 2005 dir. Neil Marshall. One of the few horror movies to actually scare me. Plus the practical effects are rlly good!

🐝 how old are you?

🐝 school, university, occupation, other?

^^^

🐝 do you prefer hot or cold?

I think my fashion sense works much better in fall and winter, otherwise im honestly pretty immune to the weather.

🐝 name one fact others may not know about you.

Because I was weaned in Bumfuck, Appalachia, I was conditioned to enjoy a regional delicacy: peanut butter sandwiches dipped in chili. Imagine my suprise when i moved to Bumfuck, Great Plains and realized their regional variant is Cinnamon rolls dipped in chili 🤢

🐝 are you shy?

Not entirely. I'm very bad with communicating with new people, not out of shyness, just cause I'm bad at it LOL

🐝 do you have any preferred pronouns?

He/Him

🐝 any pet peeves?

Plenty haha

🐝 what’s your favorite “dere” type?

Not to be a weeb, but I've been drawn to kuudere personality types ever since i was little. I think it started with Kanade Tachibana. I rewatched Angel Beats bc it was put back on netflix and relived my youth, and I liked her character just as much as i did back then. Rei, Lain (although she's not technically kuudere since you need that hidden affection to qualify) etc. Ive always been interested in this character dynamic.

🐝 rate your life 1-10. 1 being really crappy and 10 being the best you could ever be.

Hm, i don wanna get into that 🤘

🐝 what’s your main blog?

this is she.

🐝 list your side blogs and what they are used for.

@static-oceans is my art blog. I dont post my art there often, but i do when i remember.

@static-dolls is my doll blog. Again, I'm mostly keeping my doll stuff to myself, but i may go back to it again soon!

🐝 is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?

I don't... or really i just can't show much affection physically or verbally. Trust that i care about you a lot, even when I don't reciprocate, initiate, or repsond to those types of interactions. I'm working on it :')

Tagging (and ofc don't feel obligated. I don't Interact with too many people here) @modsachiko @vegetaljuce

#personal

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danfanciesphil · 6 years

Text

Give Me A Try (New Chapter)

Gay Instagram Model/Bartender Phan AU Part 3

(Part One)

(Part Two)

(Read on Ao3!)

Dan’s in the middle of his break, scrolling through his phone, when a text notification appears at the top of his screen. He drops his bagel into his lap, cursing.

The text is from Phil. He doesn’t know any other Phil’s, so it has to be AmazingPhil, texting him, inexplicably.

He clicks the notification, eyes wide, simultaneously scooping up the bagel bits that have fallen onto his knees.

From: Phil To: Dan im in makeup for a weird photoshoot for some korean clothing brand and they just put loads of silver goo in my hair to make it chromey

As Dan is reading the message, searching between the lines for a reason Phil might be telling him this information, another text pings through.

From: Phil To: Dan whoops, i kinda meant to send that to PJ. but hey, if you’re interested, here’s a pic of me with ‘Kpop Idol Silver Hair Paste’ in lol xx

From: Phil To: Dan [image]

The phone slips from Dan’s fingers, clattering through his legs to the floor of the staff room. Phil has sent him a selfie. An un-edited, un-Instagrammed photo of his breathtaking face, up close. Sure, there’s a weird silvery goop in his usually raven hair, but still. Gingerly, Dan retrieves the phone, a small, strangled sound escaping from his throat as he surveys the image in front of him.

It makes a little more sense now that Phil has informed him that he had actually mistakenly texted the original message, but did the guy really have to follow up with a photo? He must, surely, be aware of Dan’s crush. He witnessed the brunt of Dan’s obsessive stalking in person on his phone, after all.

Bagel entirely forgotten, Dan just stares down into the pixelated blue of Phil Lester’s eyes, wondering how to respond, and if he even should. Deciding eventually that it would be rude not to, Dan shakily types out something he hopes is vaguely witty.

From: Dan To: Phil hahaha wow :’) kpop? more like kpoop. (it looks like bird poop, sorry dude.) x

From: Phil To: Dan hahaha it does ur so right. and if you think thats bad you should see the outfits… xx

Settling back into his chair, Dan bites his lip. As he thinks of a potential response, his eyes wander over to the spot, just to the right of him, where he and Phil had stood not long ago, when it had seemed like maybe, possibly, Phil might’ve…

But obviously that’s absurd.

Dan’s wishful thinking had clearly driven him to the point of hallucination, because the very notion that Phil Lester, AmazingPhil, the famous Instagram model, would ever have looked at Dan as anything more than a random bartender, is laughable.

Dan sighs to himself, then smirks. Well, just because he has no chance, doesn’t mean he can’t utilise his semi-connection to the celebrity to get some behind-the-scenes footage of his fave.

From: Dan To: Phil well now i have to see x

There’s a noticeable pause, and Dan wonders, panicking vaguely, if he may have pushed too far. Is it a little much to ask this of Phil? Maybe he just won’t respond, and Dan will have to quit his job forever, or maybe just spend his shifts on red alert that Phil will wander into the bar, and hide from him if he does-

He texts back.

From: Phil To: Dan [image]

From: Phil To: Dan hot, right? xx

For two long, uninterrupted minutes, Dan is frozen. Then, he lets out a muffled groan of frustration. The photo Phil sent is a full body shot taken by someone else; he’s dressed in an asymmetrical long white t-shirt with several long rips through the chest, some bright pink camouflage trousers, and a shiny silver puffer jacket with a black fur-lined hood. The outfit is a complete disaster, but it doesn’t matter in the slightest. His chest is visible through the slits in the tee; having seen it twice now IRL, Dan is drawn to the slivers he can see. The trousers make his eyes pop, and the jacket matches the silver streaked through his hair.

His pose is casual, feet apart, smirking at the camera, with his hands gesturing to his body as if to say ‘see what i mean?’. If he’d posted this on his Instagram, Dan gets the feeling he’d have saved it to his camera roll anyway, maybe even made it his phone background.

Dan’s done that with a few of his favourite photos of Phil in the past. He won’t even dwell on the time when Phil posted a photo of himself in the bath and Dan, in a semi-sleep-deprived fit of insanity, printed the photo out and stuck it on his wall.

Tyler came over once, weeks later, saw the photo taped above Dan’s bed, and tore the thing down. He’d told Dan, quite rightly, to stop being such a creep and keep his crazed obsessive behaviour to social media like everyone else.

“Who even has physical photos these days?? You’re like a fucking serial killer!”

Dan chuckles at this memory. He’s glad for Tyler, sometimes, even if he’s only good for keeping Dan’s stalkerish behaviour within the realms of normalcy.

Belatedly, he realises it’s been over five minutes and he still hasn’t responded to Phil. Also, his break is close to being over.

From: Dan To: Phil woww. please, phil of the future, tell me what life is like in 2087 x

From: Phil To: Dan stawwp. i keep laughing out loud at what ur saying and now the designer is sending me death glares :’’’D xx

Trying hard to ignore the fact that his dorky jokes are apparently literally making Phil ‘lol’, Dan checks the time, and sighs, typing out another message.

From: Dan To: Phil is the designer a martian? or maybe secretly one of those reptile-people? maybe skin him just to be safe. also my break is over so i gtg. have fun on set of NASA’s moonlanding recreation x

From: Phil To: Dan aww ur at work too? that sux. i forgot that u work at night lol. hope u stay dry this evening ;) xx

From: Dan To: Phil speaking of… why are u at work? isnt it kind of late for a photoshoot? x

From: Phil To: Dan well its 8am here so no haha xx

From: Dan To: Phil where are you? x

From: Phil To: Dan seoul :) hence the… unusual fashion lol xx

Dan’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. He stands from his chair, throws his half eaten bagel in the trash, and looks around himself. He’s in the staff room - a small, dusty space with a row of falling apart lockers, a couple of chairs and a small table. There’s a hook on the wall which holds a load of unused aprons, and a rusty heater for when it’s especially cold.

He’s about to go back out to serve a load of rowdy customers some overpriced cocktails, then mop a dancefloor sticky with sweat, alcohol, and whatever other liquids might have found their way there. Then, he’s going to go back to his crummy flat way across in Kemptown, unfold his sofabed, and fall asleep to Netflix.

Phil, on the other side of the world in Korea, is having his hair, makeup and wardrobe done by professionals. He’s being treated like a celebrity, no doubt, and pampered excessively. Later, he’ll receive high-definition, professional photographs of himself looking gorgeous, and post them to his Instagram, where millions of people will tell him how stunning he looks.

Dan sighs to himself. How the other half lives.

The following day, Dan wakes up to find that Phil has updated his Instagram story, and posted the photo with the silver goo in his hair. The same one he’d sent to Dan. The caption reads:

Not sure silver hair was a good idea! The designer was going for Kpop, but ended up with Kpoop… can’t wait to show you guys the photos from this shoot! xx

Two things cross Dan’s mind.

First, Dan can now officially state that he had a sneak-peek at an official AmazingPhil photo before it was posted.

Second, the bitch totally stole his joke.

He smiles to himself ruefully, then decides to leave a comment. There’s no way that Phil will even see it - he’s never seen any of Dan’s others, or at least Dan sincerely hopes he hasn’t, as they’re mostly things like ‘choke me’ or ‘slap me round the face with your yaoi hands dad’.

Okay, maybe he tends to leave those sorts of comments when he’s less than sober.

This time, Dan just taps out a simple:

danisnotonfire: joke stealing is a low form of theft phil smh ;)

Still smiling to himself, Dan rolls over onto his side, and settles in to watch Phil’s story. The stories are usually long, silly, and full of adorable clips of Phil being clumsy and cute. As expected, this one is no exception. It’s a tour of Phil’s hotel room in Seoul, which is very posh.

Phil exclaims over the origami hand towels on his bed, the robe provided for him in the wardrobe, and the multiple options on the ‘disco shower’ as he calls it. Just as Dan is marvelling at the panoramic shot Phil has filmed of his view from the balcony, a notification pings at the top of his screen.

amazingphil replied to your comment: joke stealing is…

Dan sits bolt upright in bed, the sheets falling off him. He runs a hand through his messy hair, eyes wide. He clicks the notification before it disappears, heart pounding.

Oh no, oh no, oh no. Dan hadn’t intended for him to actually see. What if Phil thinks he’s being rude? He doesn’t actually mind Phil stealing his stupid joke about the hair goo. It’s an honour, if anything, that Phil finds his dumb joke good enough to post as a caption millions of people will read.

Heart thrumming, Dan finds the response Phil left.

danisnotonfire: joke stealing is a low form of theft phil smh ;)

amazingphil: @danisnotonfire aha i was kinda hoping you wouldn’t see ;D

Another notification pings at the top of his screen.

amazingphil started following you

“Holy shit,” Dan says to nobody.

amazingphil liked your photo

“Fuck,” Dan squeaks, clutching his pillow for support. “Stop it Phil, I’m gonna have a heart attack.”

Curious, Dan clicks the last notification, wondering which photo it was that Phil pressed the little heart for. To his surprise, it’s a selfie, one he took at work around a month ago. He took it during a lull between serving, if he remembers correctly. The lighting hadn’t been awful when he was doing his hourly fringe check in his phone camera, so he’d snapped a pic. It’s nothing special, just a moody expression and a wash of pink lighting across one half of his face.

amazingphil commented on your photo

amazingphil: nice pout ;) xx

Dan falls back into the pillows, mind obliterating itself into a thousand, tiny pieces.

Over the next few weeks, Dan has several text conversations with Phil. They’re usually started by Phil himself, who will - out of what Dan assumes is boredom - sometimes send him a random meme, a musing about his surroundings, or a selfie. For obvious reasons, Dan prefers the latter.

No matter how many times Phil reaches out via text, the surreality of it never fails to send Dan’s mind freewheeling. It always knocks the wind out of his lungs, it always makes him stop dead in his tracks, and it always leaves him struggling to recover for the next few hours. Whenever this happens at work, Tyler never fails to tease him mercilessly.

“Whoops! Please excuse him, sir, his mind has been blended by a single text from his crush,” Tyler tells a customer the fifth time Dan drops a glass behind the bar.

Dan scowls at his friend, but doesn’t try to defend himself. It’s true, after all. One text from Phil has him behaving like a moron. He becomes physically inept, unable to make the simplest drink.

One night, after the bar has closed, Dan and Tyler are cleaning up.

“So when’s he gonna stop torturing you over text and come sweep you off your beer-drenched tootsies?”

Dan rolls his eyes at this. “He’s not, Ty. He’s a rich and famous superstar, and I’m clearing up puke for the third day in a row.”

Dan wrinkles his nose as he continues mopping up the patch of vomit. He’s suspicious at this point; three days in a row is unusual. Is the same person coming in each night and spewing their guts all over the dance floor out of spite? Perhaps it’s some sort of hate crime.

“It’s like a Cinderella story!” Ty exclaims, pirouetting around his broom. “Except it’s gay, which makes it even better.”

Dan scoffs at him. “I’m pretty sure fairytales don’t involve stalking someone over social media and having them find out. He’s just taking pity on me because he saw that first night that I’m a fan.” Dan dunks the mop back in the bucket, turning to Tyler. “Besides, I’m pretty sure he has a boyfriend.”

Tyler sucks in a scandalised breath. “What! Who?”

Dragging the mop back to the supply closet, Dan laughs. “Remember the drunk guy he came with? The one who gave me a lovely Rainforest shower?”

“Him?”

Dan sighs, locks the cupboard, and nods. He digs into his pocket for his phone, and brings it over to show Tyler the photo of Phil and Charlie kissing. Matt, the security guard wanders over to see as well, letting out a low whistle.

“He’s a nonce if he thinks that guy’s behaviour was attractive,” Matt says. “He puked ‘soon as I got him out the door that night. All over the pavement.”

Dan looks at Matt, tilting his head in interest. “He did?”

Tyler plucks the phone out of Dan’s hand, zooming into the photo to have a better look, a frown on his face.

“Yep, your friend there came out, called him an Uber and sent him off,” Matt says. “Doubt pukey there would’ve made it home without him.”

“Nice guy,” Dan mutters, cheeks warm.

“This is staged,” Tyler announces abruptly.

“What?”

“Look,” he says, bringing the phone back over for Dan to see.

He zooms in on the crux of the kiss, right onto Phil’s face. Dan grimaces.

“Ty, I don’t want to see-”

“Shut up and look at his face,” Tyler interrupts, grabbing Dan’s chin and angling it towards the phone. “See how his lips are puckered? All stiff and pointed, like he’s kissing his grandma. And his eyes are open.”

“He’s looking at the camera!”

“Nah, Tyler’s right mate,” Matt says. The gum he’s chewing is making gross squishy sounds right in Dan’s ear as he leans over to look. “He looks awkward as hell.”

Dan narrows his eyes at the photo, trying to see what the others see.

“Besides, didn’t you say he hated that guy?” Tyler asks, clicking off the photo.

Dan tuts, snatching his phone back. “Well, apparently he was just being nice to compensate for the fact his kissing buddy covered me in sugary cocktail.”

He makes the smart decision to step away from this preposterous conversation before he does something stupid. Like allow either of these morons to give him hope that Phil is actually single.

Not that Phil being single would even matter.

“Or he was making it clear that he’s available!” Tyler calls after him as Dan stalks over to the staff room. “He whipped his shirt off for you twice and gave you his number. Do you think he’d do that if he had a boyfriend?”

“Drop it, Ty!” Dan calls back, shutting the staff room door behind him.

He will not let himself fall into the trap of daring to believe he could get someone as gorgeous, as hilarious, as pure and… amazing, as Phil Lester.

He won’t.

This is a good philosophy, in theory.

In practise, it turns out to be a lot more difficult. Dan finds this out to his cost when Phil strolls into Habenero the following Friday with Charlie Hickory at his side. Dan’s stomach sinks as soon as he sees the pair, the butterflies that appear each time Phil so much as acknowledges exploding into dust the moment he registers who Phil is here with.

Phil makes a beeline for the bar, a big smile on his face as he sees Dan. Warily, Dan smiles back, very aware that he is not exactly Charlie’s biggest fan.

“Dan!” Phil sings, chipper as ever.

Blushing already, Dan waves an awkward hand. He will never, he’s sure, get used to hearing his name on Phil Lester’s lips. “Hi. You’re back.”

“Of course! This is my local hangout now,” Phil says, winking. “Great cocktails, cute bar staff, crazy Bingo nights… this place has got it all.”

“Some people might not agree with you about the cocktails,” Dan can’t help himself saying, glancing at Charlie.

Charlie shuffles awkwardly on the spot. “Right,” he says, casting a look at Phil. They share a look that seems loaded with something Dan is not privy to, and then Charlie sighs, turning to Dan. “I wanted to, uh, apologise. About last time. Totally not cool of me to… tell you off like that. I was wasted.”

For an awkward moment, Dan waits for the actual word ‘sorry’ to leave Charlie’s mouth. It becomes obvious fairly swiftly that the dude feels he’s already said enough, so Dan just gives him a tight smile, and clears his throat.

“Oh, yeah man,” he says. “Let’s just… move on, I guess.”

If Charlie won’t say sorry, then Dan’s sure as hell not going to say he forgives him.

“So, drinks?” Phil asks, seeming to sense the taut atmosphere. “Maybe not cocktails?”

Dan can’t help the splutter of laughter, but Charlie shoots a dagger-like glare Phil’s way. It makes Dan’s lip curl; how could anyone be angry with Phil, of all people?

“Maybe some beers?” Dan suggests, teeth clenched. “We have a load of craft beers, or if you’re more into spirits I could make you guys a-”

“I’ll have a vodka and light tonic, no ice,” Charlie interrupts. “A double. If you use regular tonic, I will know.”

“Charlie,” Phil hisses under his breath.

They exchange another loaded look, and again Charlie sighs, turning to Dan with a fake smile. “Please.”

Swallowing the urge to roll his eyes, Dan nods, then gladly turns his attention to Phil. “And for you?”

“Oh,” Phil says, like it’s only just occurred to him that he needs to order as well. “God, I’m so bad at deciding, err…”

As he’s dithering, Charlie sighs. “Are you cool to get these, Phil? I’m gonna go find us a table.”

“You don’t wanna dance?”

“Not in the mood.”

Phil nods, obviously disappointed. “Okay, yeah, I’ll meet you in the back.”

With that, Charlie is gone, slipping into the crowd. The look of distaste must be more evident on Dan’s face than he thinks, because Phil laughs at it.

“I know,” Phil says. “But he does have a few… marginally amiable qualities.”

‘Why have you chosen to be with someone that’s marginally amiable when you’re so great,’ is what Dan wants to ask. Instead, he simply shrugs, deciding to change the subject.

“Have you decided on a drink yet? I’d better get on with making his low-cal dishwater.”

Phil laughs a little, then leans forwards, his smile deepening as he leans across the bar. “Surprise me.”

Something sparks a roman candle in Dan’s stomach, and his skin prickles with the heat it creates. He drags his eyes free of Phil’s with some difficulty, nodding, and turns to make the drinks.

He prepares Phil a ‘PopQueen’ cocktail, which is one of their most popular. It’s inspired by popcorn, along with the trio of Pop Queens that rule the gay music scene: Gaga, RiRi, and Bey. The moscato vodka base is made from Italian grapes to represent Gaga’s heritage, the spiced rum is a shoutout to Bey’s favourite drink, and Riri comes in in the form of a smoky splash of passion fruit bitter. The rest is topped up with popcorn syrup, lemonade, a sprinkle of caramel popcorn kernels, and as many sparkly cocktail sticks as Dan can fit in.

He explains the whole concoction to Phil as he presents it, a little smug because he knows this is an impressive looking cocktail. It’s probably his favourite one to make; the Viniq shimmery moscato vodka makes the drink swirl and shimmer - always exceptionally pretty.

Sure enough, Phil’s mouth drops open at the sight of it. “Okay wow,” Phil says, chuckling. “I’m gonna get drunk tonight, aren’t I?”

“If that’s your plan, this should definitely help you on your way,” Dan says, laughing too. “I wouldn’t recommend having a second if you want to remember your evening.”

Phil leans forwards to take a sip of the PopQueen, moaning around the straw, much to Dan’s dismay. He plucks one of the popcorn pieces off and eats it, eyes closed. In related news, Dan struggles not to fall to the floor. “Dan, you are an artiste,” Phil says. “Popcorn is my all time favourite food.”

“Oh, wow, that’s... lucky, I guess,” Dan stammers, a swell of pride surging up into his chest. “Glad you like it.”

“So, how much?”

“Oh, on the house.” Dan smiles, sliding the cocktail across the bar along with Charlie’s vodka tonic. “I feel bad for not letting you in on the forfeit for Bingo last time.”

The look on Phil’s face softens into something so sweet Dan can taste sugar on his tongue.

“You don’t have to do that,” Phil says softly.

“It’s fine, really,” Dan assures him, all but sliding his elbows across the bar towards him. “I insist.”

A twitch in the corner of Phil’s mouth, and then he’s leaning across the bar. It happens slowly, but Dan still manages to be caught off guard. One moment, he’s watching, bemused, as Phil inches towards him, and the next there’s a light press of paper-soft lips to his cheek. A scratch of stubble grazes over Dan’s skin as Phil leans away.

“Thanks,” Phil tells him, smiling. “You’re sweet, Dan.”

And then he’s turning away, drinks in hand, slipping into the mass of people.

For the next few hours, Dan hopes for Phil to return to the bar for another round. He waits, eagerly, for this moment to come. Instead, Charlie is the one who brings his and Phil’s glasses back over, and waves to flag down Dan’s attention.

He nods in acknowledgement, finishing up the drinks order he’s in the middle of, and sidling over to Charlie. He forces a strained smile.

“Same again?”

“Yeah,” Charlie says, digging out his phone. “And a couple of vodka shots.”

He says nothing else, eyes glued to his phone screen. Dan waits for a moment before moving off, eyes stuck to Charlie’s face. He’s the kind of gorgeous that shouldn’t exist in real life. Unblemished, tanned skin. Clean, dark stubble, lacing his perfect, razorblade jawline. His hair is a swoop of glossy mahogany; even the cut of it looks expensive.

Charlie’s eyes flick up to Dan’s, obviously questioning why he’s staring, so Dan nods, embarrassed, and hurries to make the drinks. From a superficial standpoint, it’s obvious why Phil is with Charlie. Obviously, in Dan’s eyes, Phil is the most attractive man on the planet, but that’s just because he’s Dan’s type. Even he can tell that Charlie is objectively a beautiful human being.

It’s just a shame about everything below the surface level.

Dan pours the two shots Charlie ordered. “All together it’s twenty pounds, please.”

Charlie snorts, then pockets his phone at last. “Figures you’d give Phil the discount.”

He pulls out a twenty and slaps it on the counter.

“Sorry, I can’t give you guys free drinks all night.”

Charlie just stares back at him, a faint, knowing smile caught on his dusty pink lips. One of this thick eyebrows is slightly quirked, sliding an irritation under Dan’s skin. “Listen, Danny, is it?”

“Dan,” he grits.

“Dan,” Charlie says, leaning across the bar. “A little advice, yeah? Don’t be so transparent. It just comes across as pathetic.”

He downs both the shots in quick succession, baffling Dan, who is frozen, mortified, to the spot. Before his brain can thaw enough to stammer out some witty rebuttal, Charlie has swept the drinks off the counter, and is moving away.

Cheeks burning, Dan turns around, trying to calm his boiling blood. He squeezes his fists together, counting to ten, the way he makes himself after all encounters with dickhead customers.

“Hey, sweetcheeks, can we get some drinks over here, please?”

With a deep sigh, Dan unclenches his fists, and turns to the next customer.

At around one in the morning, Dan runs to the bathroom for a minute, and on his way, he sees Charlie. He’s against the wall of the club, near the DJ booth. There’s a muscular, dark-skinned man pressing him there; their faces are close. Dan can’t stop, he’s left Tyler and Dodie to the mercy of the drunks in their worst state - things get rowdy an hour before closing - and he needs to get back there. So, instead, he simply tucks the image away in his mind, to think about later on.

That man, leant against Charlie in a less-than-innocent seeming stance, was certainly not Phil, after all. As he exits the bathroom, he notices that Charlie is gone, as is whoever was with him.

At 1:55am, the lights come on. As usual, an enormous groan chants out of the crowd of patrons on the dance floor, followed by a few pairs awkwardly stepping out of the shadows, some squinting and eye-covering, and the slow, jelly-legged walk to the coat-check area.

“I think I just saw some guy getting up off his knees in the corner,” Tyler says despondently. “Shotgun not mopping the floor tonight.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Dan sighs. “On the dance floor? Really? Why can’t they suck each other off in the bathroom like normal people?”

“Oh, there were definitely people doing that in one of the stalls about an hour ago,” someone says to Dan’s right. The voice, for some reason, sends the hairs up on the back of Dan’s neck.

He turns, wondering when Matt’s voice got so low, only to find that Phil has perched himself on one of the bar stools, the dregs of his cocktail still in a glass in front of him. For a moment, Dan is too stunned at the sight of him to reply. Then, he registers that the lights are on, and cringes, knowing he likely looks frightful. Phil, of course, looks radiant as ever even under the harsh fluorescents, apart from a faint tiredness, visible in the dark circles underneath his eyes.

“You’re still here,” Dan comments. “I thought you guys had gone.”

“Charlie left,” Phil says, looking away from Dan. “Or I assume he did.”

Out of sight, Tyler catches Dan’s eye, making an obscene gesture with his hands before snickering and running off in the direction of the supply closet. Dan just glares after him, pink-cheeked, and turns back to Phil.

“Wait, he left without telling you?”

One of Phil’s shoulders moves towards his neck, then falls. “He does that.”

“Wow that’s… kind of shitty.”

As soon as the words are out, Dan regrets them. He can’t help but think of Charlie’s comment from earlier; it rings in his ears as if the guy had screamed it at him.

Don’t be so transparent. It just comes across as pathetic.

He was right, probably, though Dan had hated hearing it. He should stop being such a suck-up. It must be awkward and cringey for Phil to see Dan so obviously smitten.

Still, Phil throws him a faint smile. “It’s cool. He’s just a flaky guy. A bit of a princess. He grew up rich, so he’s always been a bit superficial. I’m trying to wring the bourgeoisie out of his blue blood.”

Dan snorts with laughter. “In my experience, you can’t filter the dickishness out of people very easily.”

There’s a silence, then. Phil regards him with a faintly curious expression.

“Maybe I’m wrong,” Dan says once the silence gets too uncomfortable. He shrugs, grabbing the rag from his back pocket and starting to wipe down the bar. “I don’t know the guy, really. I’ve just had a couple of unfortunate experiences with him.”

“Oh no,” Phil says, face falling. “What did he do this time?”

Dan laughs, bitterly. “Don’t worry about it. He’s just a little mouthy, is all.”

“Ugh, I’m sorry.”

“Nothing I can’t handle.”

“So, when do you get to leave this place?” Phil asks, playing with his glass. He still hasn’t drunk the remainder of his cocktail. “Or do you sleep here?”

“On weekdays, the bar closes at two, so I get out of here at around two-thirty.”

“Christ,” Phil mutters. “And I thought my job was long hours.”

A laugh bursts out of Dan’s throat, but he covers it as best he can with a cough, turning away. Busying himself with ‘dusting’ some liquor bottles, Dan tries to compose a straight face. Is Phil honestly going to try and argue that his job is difficult? When was the last time that guy ever grabbed a broom, or handled someone’s sticky change?

In a minute, Dan is going to go into the corner of the dance floor, get down on his knees, and clean up some randomer’s come. A few weeks ago he saw Phil swanning about a five-star hotel in Korea. If AmazingPhil’s worst complaint is that he had to have a few questionable outfit choices put on him, and some silvery goo in his hair, then he needs a reality check.

Nevertheless, Dan knows that he can’t say any of this. Not only would he never dream of insulting Phil Lester, but it’s pointless to try and explain the differences between classes to someone in a privileged position. They’ve usually forgotten how to understand.

“Are you close by, at least?” Phil asks, interrupting Dan’s thoughts.

Dan turns back to him. “Kemptown. It’s half an hour’s walk, more or less.”

“You walk?” Phil asks, eyebrows skyrocketing towards his quiff. “At two in the morning?”

“Five in the morning on weekends,” Dan confirms, hiding a smile at Phil’s surprise. “It’s okay, you get used to it. Besides, it’s mostly just drunk idiots chugging cans of cider and threatening to run into the sea. Not too scary.”

Despite Dan’s reassurance, the look of pity and concern on Phil’s face doesn’t subside. After a while, Dan turns from it, feeling awkward. He busies himself with clearing away the last of the empty glasses, yawning into the crook of his elbow. Tonight was rough.

“You should crash at mine,” Phil blurts.

Sure he must have misheard, Dan faces Phil slowly. “Um, what?”

“If you’re exhausted, I mean.” Phil fidgets, fingers tapping against his glass. “Like, on the nights you can’t face walking all the way home, you can totally just sleep on my sofa.”

Speechless, Dan simply stares.

“The couch is pretty comfy,” Phil continues in a ramble, not meeting Dan’s eye. “And my flat is just up the road, literally like a minute away. I’m not saying, y’know, come over every night, ‘cause obviously… that might be an issue, but you can absolutely stay round on, say, Saturday nights when you finish later. That wouldn’t be a problem.”

He’s just being nice. That’s Dan’s only explanation. Phil Lester is a sweetheart of a person, and he got so worried about the hypothetical danger involved in Dan’s walks home, that he offered something big, even though he didn’t really mean it.

Dan is a stranger to him. He needs to decline the polite offer, and let Phil off the hook he accidentally created to string himself up on.

So, Dan forces out a small chuckle, and says: “Oh, no, it’s really fine. Thanks for the offer, that’s really good of you, but I quite like the walk. It’s a nice come down after a busy night.”

Phil nods, chewing his lip. He looks unconvinced. “I’m not just saying it, though.” His voice has dropped to a lower tone. “Like tonight… you’re so tired, I can see it. Just grab some sleep at mine before you head back across town.”

As soon as Phil mentions it, the quilt of his own exhaustion flops around his shoulders, dragging Dan’s bones towards the floor. He tries to picture the stumble back to his crummy flat in Kemptown, loathing each imaginary step.

“You barely know me,” Dan says - one last attempt at refusal.

Sensing he’s won, Phil smiles very slightly, then downs the rest of his cocktail at last. “I don’t know if it’s just me, Dan, but I have this feeling that we’re going to be good friends.”

(Part 4!)

#phan #phanfic #bartender au #phanfiction

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clownjail · 6 years

Text

49 Questions with Mika Part 2

Part 1

Under the cut because it's very long!

Friends

21) Best Friend(s)?

I never really considered anybody a best friend, I don't even consider the kids I lived with in the orphanage acquaintances, let alone friends. Though recently I made a friend in school, her name is Yui Komori and she's lovely!

22) Who was their first friend?

Hmm I guess my first ever friend was a blue bird called River! She was the orphanage pet, and not to brag or anything but I was cleary her favorite out of all the kids, I didn't have any friends at the orphanage and my experience there was pretty bland but River made it the experience more enjoyable! She always was quiet little thing but if i'm around, I'll never get her to shut up, which really annoyed the orphanage kids heh. When I was bought by the Ayashii's, apart of me was upset because I'll never see River again but the following day, she was in my bedroom window, waiting for my retun! I was just a kid back then so I didn't question how she got there, she wasn't an extremely good flyer to begin with and even if she was, she was still a baby, and even now, I sometimes see a glimpse of her when i'm by myself but it's probably my imagination haha.

23) What is their friend group like?

I don't really have a friend group, sometimes I hang out with Yui but she's often being dragged around with the Sakamaki's brothers. Master Shin has made it very clear that if he catches me talking casually to someone of a lower breed, I'll be severely punished! So because of that I can't interact with Yui as much as I want to.

26) Have they ever hurt a friend or lost one?

I wouldn't say I hurt a friend, more like a friend has hurt me, though I guess we were never really friends to begin with…

27) Do they have a crush on any of their friends?

*blushes* I-I consider Master Shin one of my closest friends, even if he doesn't see it that way, b-but recently I want more than that…is that what you consider a c-crush? *blush intensifies*

28) Do they share classes with good friends?

Well Yui is a year above me, so we don't share the same classes together, the only time we see each other is in the hallways, lunch or sometimes cooking class. However I do share a class with Subaru-kun, though he probably doesn't see me as a friend, let alone acquaintance, we sit next to each other and he's often fun to tease!

29) Whom do they go to the most when they need a shoulder to cry on?

The bathroom. I don't like crying in front of other people because I don't want them to worry over me, I don't want them to pity me, so whenever I feel like I need to cry, I do it in a private area.

30) What would this person do without their friends in their lives?

That's a good question…my oldest friend, River, has been with me since I was a child, I couldn't imagine what it would be like without her being there to keep me company but then again, River, doesn't live with me anymore and I'm doing fine without her but I do miss her a lot…

School

31) What grade are they in? If they arent in school, how come?

Even though im 17 years old, I'm in my first year! I didn't get a proper education most kids my age should get, so because of that I got bumped down a grade, they were actually considering dropping me to second year of Middle School, if Master Carla didn't get involve, I don't where I'll be at…

32) Do/Did they like their teachers? Was there a good one? Bad one?

…… I'll be lying if I said that I enjoy all my teachers, there are just some teachers/subjects that I do not care for nor like. Since i'm usually pulled into Master Shin shenanigans, i'm on thin ice with some teachers.

33) Do/Did they listen to their teachers or are/where they goofing off a lot?

I try my best to listen to the teachers but when you're sitting next to someone like Subaru-kun, it's gets kinda hard to listen to the lecture when your partner is angrily tearing up the test sheets hehe

34) Are/Where they a good student grade wise?

I-i mean, I like to think that i'm a good student, j-just not academically! While I enjoy most subjects, i'm awful in some of them, if it wasn't for Master Carla, strict but much needed teaching methods, I'll probably be a straight C student.

35) Do/Did they need extra help?

Yeah, I guess you could say that, usually Master Carla will tutor me, and while I do appreciate his help his teaching methods can be harsh at times, I remember the first time, I got a question wrong on a test after months of studying, I will never forget what happened next *shivers*!

37) Do/Did they have bullies in school?

There's the occasional catty group of girls, who sometimes spread snarky remarks and rumors about me and Master Shin, Master Shin would be very angry at me, if he knew I was getting worked up about false rumors, so I tried to not let their words get to me.

38) Have they ever gotten into a fight at school?

Well some of the girls could be a bit catty towards me, mostly it's because of how close I am with the Tsukinami brothers, especially Master Shin. It doesn't really bother me but sometimes the girls cross the line, and try to go physical on me, so when that happens, I usually revert to self defense. I know violence isn't always the answer but sometimes I can't help it, when fists are flying, my initial default thought process is to retort back as well! It's stuck in my brain at this point!

39) Have they ever done something stupid/embarrassing at school?

Many times! Master Shin is usually the cause of this or is somehow involve but there was this one time I was running late to class,

40) How far do they plan to go with school? If they dropped out, do they want to go back?

I'm planning to finish all three years of school! I never went to school when I was a child but now that I am attending classes, I could learn all new things that I never experience or seen before! I want to learn more and more about everything and anything, and my first step to accomplish that goal is by attending school, not like I'm complaining though!

Other

41) Are they dating anyone? Do they want to date? Are the married? Divorced?

*blushes* I-i mean I do have a slight c-crush on someone, b-but dating never crossed my mind!

42) What is their favorite hobby? Do they keep it a secret?

Because i'm a servant of the Tsukinami's, I don't have much free time but whenever I have the time, I usually practice my knitting skills! Master Shin, always teases for being interested in a 'lame hobby' but I spotted three sweaters that I knitted, in his closets, that he previously called ugly, so its safe to assume he really does like my craft *giggles*

43) If they could have one thing in life, what would it be?

For a long time, what I really wanted in life was freedom but now that I have that, I don't need anything else.

44) Do they work? If so, what is it? If not, are they looking for one or even want one?

Well I don't know if it classify as a job but i'm a servant of the Tsukinami's household. I don't really consider myself as a maid or servant, because I don't really do anything servant-like, all I really do is just help out the Tsukinami brothers with minor tasks, such as grocery shopping. I think the familiars are more useful and servant-like than I am.

45) Do they use social media?

Heh I'm not really tech-savvy as the kids these days are, so not really! (Oh my gosh Mika you're not even that old)

46) Have they ever been in the hospital?

When I was in a slave of the Ayashii's I did have some severe bruises that did needs medical attention but I wasn't given any, so no I never been to a hospital and I don't think I ever want to, some of the stories I hear about hospitals don't sound really pleasing!

47) Do they believe in the supernatural, that there is more than the eye can see?

Well I mean, I guess you could say, i'm already living with them!

48) What do they do when they get angry, stressed, or upset?

Well whenever I feel overwhelmed, I-i usually go to Master Shin *blushes*, he doesn't comfort me or anything, just knowing that's he's there, makes me feel better *blushing intensifies*. Sometimes if he's in a really good mood, I'm allowed to hold him when he's in his wolf form but those times are really rare! H-however if Master Shin is in a bad mood or if he's the cause of my stress than I usually take a walk in the forest, being cooped up all day inside, really gets to me at times so whenever I have the opportunity to go outside, I'll take it, I've find it whenever i'm surrounded by nature, all my nerves go fade away. Sometimes I have a familiar accompany me, just so I can have somebody to keep me company and other times Master Shin would go with me as well.

49) Would they consider themselves as a good person, bad person, or morally grey?

I would like to believe that i'm a good person, but I know i'm not, I have done some terrible things to other people and I very deeply regret the things that I did so the best description that fits me is morally grey.

#mika senshi #diabolik lovers oc #oc questions

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