#he fully believes in the cause and im like. YEAH YEAH THOSE ARE THE FUCKED UP BELIEFS I WANTED TO SEE

[apricotgojo]

₊˚ෆ new-found kink - S.G - nsfw! ₊˚ෆ

・❥・ Satoru discovers a love for your new panties and decides to do something about it ~

a/n - thank u for all the love im receiving for my writing hehe many kisses !! <3

"What? don't you like them , Toru?"

Gojo's mind was fuzzy - his ears ringing. and his eyes were fixed down on those pretty baby-pink panties you had on display for him. They were new, with cute little white bows on the side - their material thin enough to see the outline of your puffy folds from beneath them. Thin enough to expose just exactly how wet you were. His mouth was practically watering at the damp, dark spot which was coating the front of your panties and your usual suave, collected boyfriend was absolutely mind-fucked by how easily wet you get for him just from a heated make out session.

Satoru Gojo was fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. His cock was rock solid just from the sight of you sprawled out beneath him in nothing but your soaking wet panties. It's not like he's never seen you like this before - he has many times actually. But you've never worn a pair of panties like this. So fucking slutty and flimsy that it made his breath hitch.

"Toru?" You question when he doesn't respond, "Are you - Ah !"

Your toes curl at the sudden wave of pleasure you feel when your boyfriend slides a finger down your wet, clothed slit.

"Holy shit." his voice was barely above a whisper

His lips were parted as he slowly slides his finger up and down, your slick already glistening on it even through your panties.

"Baby," He breathes out and his eyes finally snap up at you - pupils incredibly dilated, "Look at how fucking wet you are~" He coos, amazed.

You gulp, chest heaving up and down, little whimpers leaving your parted lips as you watch your boyfriend toy with your clothed cunt. He hums as he does so, his fingers now fully coated with your juices.

"We're keeping these on for today, yeah?" His voice was raggedy and a smile twitches on his pretty bitten lips as he leans forward, his breath hot on the shell of your ear, "Don't want them to go to waste now do we?" he whispers.

Your back arches at the tone of his voice, shutting your eyes as your boyfriend applies more pressure on that sweet- sweet spot on your core. "mmm~" You can hear the smirk in his voice as his hand moves faster, the squelching sound coming from between your legs filling the room. Heat burns across your entire body, your pussy practically getting wetter by the second - Gojo was making you feel embarrassed and he fucking loved it

You notice that his free hand was tucked away under his boxers, slowly moving up and down his length as he touches you.

"Can i please make a mess on them, angel?" He purrs in your ear, causing you to gasp. "Let me ruin them."

as if on auto-pilot, you nod furiously, your hips bucking up to grind down harder on his hand. He lets out a small chuckle, kissing your ear before straightening his back.

He wasted no time in pulling down his boxers, his pretty, flushed cock slapping up against his toned abdomen - pre-cum already drooling from the tip. His dark, blue eyes scan your body and he licks his lips as he gives his cock a few tugs before-

Smack!

"fuck-T-Toru!" You moan out his name as he gives your clothed cunt a mean slap with his cock.

He lets out a throaty chuckle as he keeps tapping his heavy cock against it, causing you to let out the cutest little gasps and whines with every tap.

"My baby must love me soooo fucking much," he grabs his cock and starts sliding it up and down between your folds, your juices splattering all over the two of you. "can't believe that you're still getting wetter and wetter for me."

The feeling of his cock weighing down against your sensitive cunt was making you see stars. no time was wasted before his cock was coated with your slick mixed with the precum that was spewing from his pulsing tip.

You felt so dirty - the room was full of whimpers, jagged breaths and wet noises. Your cunt was aching for him - No, it was quite literally crying for him.

His flushed tip meets your covered entrance and he prods at it with his cock, the tip of his tongue stickling out the side of his mouth as he does so.

"You want me inside you so bad, right angel?" He eyes were focused on the way his tip was sinking into you though your panties, just barely enough to stretch you out, causing you to squirm beneath him.

"Please-" Was all you could choke out before he started rutting against you faster. He was starting to lose his composure, you noticed by the way his hair was sticking to his forehead, by the way he was biting his bottom lip as his eyes feasted hungrily at the sight of your puffy folds struggling to wrap around his thick length, the material of your panties so fucking wet at this point that you wouldn't even consider it underwear anymore.

"my god - such a slut- hah- fuckin' letting me use your pussy like this-" he was blabbering and spewing cusses at this point, his cock violently rubbing that sensitive nub. "I'm the only one who can get you this wet, right baby?"

Seeing him so into your pussy like this was driving you insane. "Y-yes Toru, mmmff - only you- fuck~"

A fucked out smile appeared on his glistening, pretty pink lips. "ah- yes- fuck yes - and i'm the only one who can cum on these cute little panties, hmm?"

You nod your head, spreading your legs further and gripping on the sheets. His cock twitched at the sight of your pussy slightly peaking from the material. He wanted to cum on your pussy so bad - it was like he discovered a new fetish that he never knew he had. "wanna cover it in my cum - fuck, gotta mark what's m-mine right?" You didn't know if he was speaking to you or himself at this point. He was whining, muttering your name and furrowing his eyebrows - you could tell he was close to coming.

"p-please make a mess on me - use me." That 'use me' you purred out had his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

"mmm-fuck! baby- baby- I'm gonna-hah!"

His head tilts back - glistening, toned chest heaving up and down as he lets out the most delicious sounding, guttural groan from his throat, the tip of his cock pulsing against your cum covered little pussy.

you felt like an absolute whore - all fucked out and you didn’t even cum yet.

His cum felt so warm and so fucking good as he smeared it all over your pussy with his fat tip, breathing heavily as he did so.

He sighed - a small, satisfied smile now painting his features.

"lets put these cute little panties to the side now.”

[aechii]

getting into a fight with jude then you break up w him , then months later he sees you at a party n still wants you back 🙏🏽🙏🏽

₍₍ SiX FEET UNDER ₎⁠₎

PAiRiNG ?! toxic!ex!jude x exgf!reader

GENRE ?! angst

C/W ?! she/her pronouns used, unhealthy relationship, something about writing toxic!jude that has me brainrotting, reader knows her worth, profanity, a small cameo of playboy!trent, drinking (sip responsibly ppl)

A/N ?! i love love love writing toxic!jude, fight me. other than that, plz do enjoy because for once in a while, im liking what i've written <3 [next fic will be a trent one, dwdw]

~°~

"you're not fucking getting me, jude!"

the heat she felt is all encompassing, red, burning fury for a man— boy, who timelessly strung her along with reins of faded promises and stagnant affection. a piling mountain of 'what could i have done better?' weighed like rocks and bricks, yet if her mother were here, she would've looked on with absent surprise.

she had warned her daughter, begged her even, that men— boys like jude had their words proclaimed as if in the finality of red ink, but their minds basked in a bath of sinful infidelity.

but [y/n] craved love. a feeling she had never encountered fully as it was more of a come and go, never marinating into her flesh and heart. but jude— god, jude, with his heightened charisma and intoxicating smile, had promised to love her from sunrise to sunset, from dusk till dawn.

yet, if those words held any truth, then they wouldn't have stood there, in an air of edged demise.

"listen," jude looked completely uncaring, dragging a hand down his face, "if you can't fucking tell, i'm trying, yeah? and it's not everyday i'm gonna be available."

"i never said i wanted you here everyday, jude," [y/n] cried, frustrated. her bones felt heavy, yet it was the hurt in her chest that blinded every sense of her's.

jude threw his arms in the air, scoffing, "then what the hell d'you want, [y/n]?" his voice resonated with exasperation.

"for you to be 100%, jude, it's not that hard! and if you can't handle a relationship— an exclusive relationship, then don't waste my time!"

they were tipping over at the edge of the cliff, and their fall was inevitable. frankly speaking, [y/n] should've known that their whole... involvement with each other was just a sprint to this foreshadowed end. it started off rocky, and no matter how insistent the red lights were, her eyes were glazed with blatant ignorance.

jude's presence then was like a toxin, accumulating in her muscles and causing every inch of movement to release pain. she needed to leave, with not a turn of her head back, and put jude in her first and only failed attempt of what could've been a blissful experience.

"you know what? i'm done— i can't stand here looking stupid for a boy who doesn't love me the same way," she scoffed, turning on her heel to climb the stairs.

she wished she hadn't had heard it. maybe it would've made her departure easier, that jude, truthfully, cared about her and just had the pieces of his mind misplaced and skewed. that maybe all they needed was space and time to seek and mend before they could try again.

but what she got was like a slap to the face, and the sickening truth that jude was never hers. and never wanted to be hers.

"since you can't understand where i'm coming from for shit, by all means, [y/n], leave."

+_-

the party had been, literally, timeless for jude. he hadn't known for how long he swirled the red cup of [spiked] punch pressed into his hand as he leaned against the door frame and observed the busy bodies that made him stick out like a sore thumb.

it had been months, 3 months, as jude'd been counting, since [y/n] bode her adieu to their relationship, or rather, whatever remnant of it remained. he felt like a disassociated body, existing for the mere fact that he had to, not because he wanted to, and part of him wanted to believe that it was all part of the 'life' experience.

it wasn't.

denial was a vile thing, and everyday, he woke up thinking that their end was her fault, and not his. that whatever they had was a lesson among others, and that he had to move on and find someone else that he could attach his data to.

but he knew, knew that [y/n] was a person that appeared like a blue moon, and soon enough, he found himself lost like a needle in a haystack and regretting. had no one but himself to blame, even his damn brother told him so.

his appearance externally, to those who didn't know what revved inside him, was a continuous ebb and flow from one party to another. whatever he had to do to make him forget was his priority, and if he had to get mind-numbingly drunk to do so, then it was welcomed to be his guest.

it was his 3rd one of the week, by approximation. more or less, he didn't care, nor did he want to know, because recklessness was what seemed more comfortable than guilt and shame, and he was so sure that his body was more alcohol than water. counted his lucky stars that it was the end of the season and so he could do whatever his heart urged him to do. his heart, keyword there.

his darkened mood seemed to have seeped into the room because after hours of remaining stagnant doing nothing, trent walked up to him, identical solo cup in one hand and the other weighing on his shoulder with concern.

"guilt is eating you up, eh?" trent chided, although not as cheerily as expected. jude grunted and took another sip as he huffed out a flippant, "shut up," that had trent throwing his hands up, as best as he could, in defence.

"look- i've been there, done that."

jude looked at him suspiciously, "you've had flings, trent."

"yeah," he shrugged, mellow yet firm, "to forget about her."

"never knew that," jude said with an air of surprise. trent wasn't necessarily the best person to come to in terms of... serious romance, per se.

just as trent went to retort, jude's eyes cast around the room, and zeroed entirely on one hovering figure, meddled with a group of more girls who looked far too merry compared to the one that caused jude's tunneled vision, and before he could stop himself, his mouth punched out a, "fuck."

trent caught whiff of jude's exasperated and frozen countenance, "what?"

it took a whole body and more for jude to respond, "she's here."

then trent's head whizzed around, seeking for the girl whose scarce presence had his friend in complete misery and his line of sight paralleled jude's, "i... did not know she was coming."

"me too," jude said automatically, and as if they had a mind of their own, his feet began to move. trent noticed immediately, and a tough grip wrenched around jude's bicep, "where do you think you're going?"

"to talk to her?" enunciated as if it were a question, but there was an undercurrent of certainty that made trent want to slap jude for his sheer stupidity.

"and do what? beg for her forgiveness as if you did not walk her out your home hand in hand?"

jude scowled at trent's bluntness, "it wasn't like that."

"well it fucking seemed like it," trent chastised.

jude was completely deaf to trent's words by then, as the second she was left alone by the bar, he had an aim. an aim to get her back by the end of the night, and if he didn't, he wouldn't walk out there with all pieces of him intact.

did he need her? yes. and it may have taken him too long to realise, but jude didn't care. it was all part of the 'life' experience.

he managed to slip out of trent's vice grip (who, at that point, had given up drilling pleads into jude. he had to plummet back to reality, one way or another), and by auto-pilot, walk towards [y/n] who has too busy ordering another round of shots to even notice his arrival until his words punctured the air, "hey."

[y/n] spun around. rapidly and in complete shock as her eyes were blown wide. she had wanted to utter everything and nothing at all, but her mouth seemed to malfunction, to both her dismay and relief, so she resolved to a questioning jut of her head forward.

jude nervously scratched the back of his neck, "i uh- how have you been?"

she thought for a few seconds then shook her head conclusively, "as best as i could be, jude."

it may have not been intentional- matter of fact, who had jude been kidding? it was intentional, the icy tinge in her tone and closed off-ness as she settled her stance and crossed her arms. a blank space, gaping and hollow, was left in silence as jude tried to find words to say.

"i'm sorry."

[y/n] looked at him incredulously, "you're sorry?"

jude nodded.

and then she laughed. jude would've blamed it on drunkeness if it hadn't been for the obvious, mocking sarcasm as she stopped and looked at him just as quickly as she started.

"you're funny jude, very funny," she chuckled, turning around to slide a shot glass from the counter, raising it in gratitude to the bartender who gave her a nod back, before patting jude's arm to walk away.

he was delirious by then. in absolute confusion, wondering what he had done to seem so... ridiculous to [y/n]. he had apologised, hadn't he? made sure to make it as geniune as he mouth could mold it and that was enough. it had to be.

he spluttered, reaching out to stop her by her wrist, but, as if his touch were hot, she slapped him away, "don't you fucking touch me, jude."

"i said i'm sorry-"

"and you think that's enough? to do what, jude? get me back?"

he nodded and she laughed again, chesty and completely deprecating.

"you know, let me give you advice jude," her expression submerged jude 6 feet under, it felt like it, "don't date. you're completely shit at it."

jude was definitely 6 feet under.

[song-tam]

i am SO distressed right now what the fuckkkkk. i read a BUNCH of orv to pass time on a long plane ride and i think that was maybe not one of my best ideas……….. screaming sobbing punching the wall dramatically i hate this book so much

i’m right before they all group regress and Fuck. What The Fuck. i finally know what 51/49 means and can i go back to not knowing. what the fuck. and then,,,, yjh’s 0th turn???? if i continue to regress will i ever get to meet you again??????? that affecting the other world line??????????? and even before that too, with the oldest dream reveal,, FUCK. like i sort of expected it but it was still so devastating to read. and THEN. the quote that’s like “the oldest dream was the worlds most omniscient yet powerless god” or something. OW. i feel like i’ve been stabbed repeatedly. every time i type out another sentence in this ask i want to sob.

and then,,,,, his companions realizing something’s wrong. han sooyoung being the first to act on this because the kim dokja she knows best is the one that isn’t here. yoo joonghyuk choosing to regress (in both this world and the 0th turn) for that sliver of a chance that he’ll see kdj again. and the fact that kdj doesn’t consider even once that this might happen, that his companions would realize something was different. and this isn’t even something new! in all the times he sacrifices himself, he fails to truly acknowledge how much it affects the ones he cares about. he doesn’t comprehend (or is unwilling to comprehend) how much he is loved. his happily ever after doesn’t even include him, not fully — and i don’t think he believes he’s deserving of that happily ever after, either. he’s a reader. he doesn’t realize that this is his own story, too. goddddd i hate this book SO much (<- lying)

ORV ON PLANE RIDES SO REAL…….. tbh it’s such a Plane Book something abt being thousands of feet in the sky in a giant heap of metal while reading the most devastating piece of media to ever exist. what a vibe truly

WHEN I TELL YOU IWAS GAGGED AT 49/51. HONESTLY. kdj CONSTANTLY sacrificing himself to save his friends because these are the same people that have BEEN saving him since was fifteen fuck my life. god.

0TH TURN YJH IS SO INSANE the way it all comes back to those two. i literally could write paragraphs abt 0th turn they make me feral he guided him through all of it he got to see an ending where yjh got to live a long happy life and it’s what he was reading for the entire time im actually

oldest dream & kdj………….. tbh i think that must be so heartbreaking on both sides. kdj seeing his younger self and being so upset because at the end of the day it was him causing suffering for the people he loves most but oldest dream seeing his older self coming to fucking kill him and thinking that it didn’t get any better at all. he can’t even be loved by himself who else would love him then

YES HIS COMPANIONS GODDDDD the yoohankim of it all makes me SO sick actually. especially han sooyoung because hey he was supposed to be her reader. that’s what he promised her. instead she has a version of kdj that doesn’t even really read anymore and what kind of kdj is that? and yjh wanting to get kdj back because he was promised they’d see the ending TOGETHER and instead he doesn’t even have a full half of him. promises made promises broken to BOTH OF THEM fuck i’m unwell

kdj i hate you and your self sacrifice. i’m literally. exactly what you said tbh like he is loved!!!!!! and he doesn’t fucking realize it. but the thing is he would be dense to not know and that’s why 49!kdj exists in the first place bc he’s hoping that will be enough for them to just fucking sit still and live their lives. in his head he’s downplaying his importance which is why he gives them a fucking replacement

AUGHHH fine line between reader and protagonist and writer and the way all the roles are interchangeable and im. yeah. god

[roachemoji]

NEW ST LIVE BLOGGING bc i lost my old thread lmao S1 06-08 (but not really i need to rewatch the end again)

Episode 6

OKAY im starting like halfway through ep 6 again

the AUTISM in the first 30 seconds of this episode starting up again lmao EL calling him a mouth breather because its the first insult she fucking hears??? Yea YEAH

GOD JOYCE IN A TURTLE NECK <- my mom (hold oni have to jump back up here because I completetly skipped the part about Jane and her mom and the connection to El and i feel like its a little too on the nose that thats who El is given how much ive seen and read about the fuckery and connections in this show so im waiting on that - unless it is just... that. AKJHD)

I LOVE DUSTIN SO MUCH WHY DO I NEVER HEAR ANYTHING ABOUT HIM LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

hes SO smart holy shit i mean they all are but his interpersonal skills are so JUST YEAH CALL THEM OUT CALL THEM OUT also his quiet "ok" when he pushes that theyre all his best friends UGH

is this the scene is this the i think im about to watch the thing i just OH MAN HE JUST CLOCKED HIM WHO STRADDLES A MAN LIKE THAT WHEN YORUE FIGHTING HELLO

damn

anyway sorry Johnathan and Nancy Platonic Soulmates Best Friends Forever im making them bracelets !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh man i was gonna mention the van that Lucas saw but i forgot also GOD DUSTIN IS THE ONLY ONE WITH FUCKIGN SENSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH boys boys boys boys boys

I FORGOT HE PISSED HIS FUCKING PANTS LMAO

JUST PISS YOUR PANTS???? oh he okay yeah i though the was actually asking him to just piss his fucking pants

DUSTIN JUST SACRIFICING HIMSELF WHY DO I NOT HEAR MORE ABOUT HIM ACTUALLY

SO what would happen if Mike had like died what would happen if those kids had caused his death like wouold they have just ran and left Dustin or pushed him off or what like AKJSHDSKAJHD

IM SORRY THE SONG WHEN EL SHOWS UP IS SO FUCKING FUNNY

El exxperiencing PTSD so vividly breaks my fucking heart like girlie i understand i understan di do i reall really do god im so sorry BABY GIRL ITS OKAY AOOIASUDSKAH SHE OPENED THE GATE DAMN gonna like swaddle her or something god

im sorry the squad of white vans going to kidnap children is a little too on the fucking nose for me

---

Episode 7

real talk could El not just explode them what if El just exploded them i mean obviously theres OTHER consequences like... killing people BUt i mean.

SHE IDNT EXPLODE THE VAN BUT I MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT GUY IS PROBABLY DEAD SO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pausing to say something actually: How child abuse is depicted so far in the show is very scary to me in how real it feels. To be a kid in those situations, to not understand the power you weild because an adult as manipulated you into believing that you're helpless? That the only person you can rely on is them, even as they're actively harming you? Brenner being aware of the harm that El can cause him but believing so strongly in the hold he has on her and therefore he is above consequence, above harm? fucking yucky The scene of him giving her the potted flower made my stomach sink. Felt a little too close to home I know that themes of abuse are really prevelant in this show and Its really interesting to see how it affects people different but especially El, someone who'se pretty fucking clearly autistic and shows a lot of the same symptoms that i did post abuse? I thought i had more to say on it and maybei will as time goes on i just!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ough okay moving on --

LUCAS!!!!!!!!! APOLOGIZING and El saying she sorry too and ALL OF THEM APOLOGIZING YEAH THIS IS BOYS BEING BOYS BABEY THIS IS!!!! BOYS! BEING! BOYS!!!!!!!

WHITE WOMAN JUMPSCARE AGAIN

i cant wait to get to the part where i understand who you (POINTS AT EM) believe she is and fully feel whatever i should feel about her and what shes done or about to do or going to do in multiple timelines or what have YOU

Mikes dad makes me want to ram my head into a wall

and BRENNER is just fucking STABS HIM STABS HIM STABS HIM

Joyce is just :3c she just!! she <3

she can.... make you fly....... and...... piss yourself

the two super powers

OUHAKJSDH i forgot they think Johnathan killed Will jesus christ i hate these two so much and OUGAKSDH GOD THANK YOU FOR AKHSDAKJH FINALLY!! THANK U IK STEVE SHAPES UP AND CHANGES HIS SHIT AND GROWS THANK GOD BUT JESUS ITS ABOUT TIME HOLY FUCK

SPIT IN HIS EYES SPIT IN HIS EYES !!!! WISH U HAD GOD NOT THEIR DND SHIT HELLOW???

the Byers,,,,,,,,,, seemed so distant before like they didnt know each other or cared but god theyre so close theyre so so close and i feel that i get that

MIKES DAD AGAIN I WANT TO HES SO FUCKING STUPID if i were locked in a room with him id put on cocomelon

HOPPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3

THE BOYS ARE ALL SO SMART I LOVE THEM OS MUCH

El is just trying so fucking hard god the liek desperation and fear or failure and guilt that she just keeps carrying itS JUST!!!!

MR CLARKS LIL DATE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! do you ever use your teacher's autism against him and force him to info dump in the same of science.

watching them setting up the pool and knowing they probably just told them to figure it out while they filmed it <3 ALSO MIKE REALIZING HIS SISTER IS ACTUALLY COOL idk need more siblings being siblings

JOYCE IS MY MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

someone giving El the option to say no? to back out? to FEEL SAFE??? im going to lose my mind im gonan scREAM and cry and throw up!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am BANGING MY FISTS On the TABLE

genuinely WAHT did barb do to deserve this WHAT DID SHE DO SHE WAS SUCH A GOOD FRIEND OH MY GOD

joyce joyc ejoCYCE JOYCE JOYCE fuck all yall shes my favorite character im in love with her

Do episodes that end in the upside down also not end with music @ em i cant remember this happening before bc i didnt write it down <3

---

Episode 8

LAST EPISIDE OF THE SEASON i went to get popcorn for this to pay full attention or as much as i could im goingin an dout of dissociating so bare with me i feel like im gonna have to rewatch the entire first season again bc i missed a lot but we'll get there in due time anyway onward and upward boys

OHH THE FIRST SCENE I SAW A PARALLEL TO EPISODE ONE!!! WITH JOYCE ON THE PHONE AND NOW YELLING AT BRENNER

god i love WHEN PEOPLE STAND UP TO BRENNER AND DONT BELIEVEHIS BULLSHIT

Hopper <333333

Johnathan and Nancy are my favorite best friends theyre jUST like GUNG FUCKING HO i love it

IM OAIUSDKAJHD NANCY AND HOPPER GOING FUCKING IN WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS NOT GONNA HAPPEN yall keep underesitimating these people because you got your fancy suits and you think ou have control of the situation and then you get your ass handed to you SO IM waiting for his ass to be handed to him

do NOTTTTT DO NOT DO THIS TO ME WITH HOPPER DONT THROW ME INTO A FUCKING FLASH BACK!!!!!!! NOT LIKE THIS NOT HERE GONNA BITE

if i have to watch people cut their palms to get blood one more time im gonna STOP STOP IT STOP IT STOP oh my GOD LIKE... BAK O FYOU HAND? YOUR ARM? GIRL.

STEEVEEEEEEEEE are the lights gonna start blinking girl please pleas eplease srteve please can he help kill please bro Im HIS big brown eyes hello hwa the fuck

SO Tumblr deleted... everything after this and im kinda upset man i got like 20 minutes left in the episode not even and it just wiped out 90% of me going balls to the fuck wall about El exploding people's brains and how much i love Joyce Byers and how they gotta stopputting me through so much emotional turmoil when it comes to Hopper and his flash backs

I think im gonna rewatch the last episode to give a better genuine reaction bc i kinda spaced out at the end and dont super know whats going on now askdhj

[cartoonrival]

like after all that shite even tho it stretched him out like saltwater taffy naruto is truly not not not not mad at sasuke for any of it. he doesnt hold anything that sasuke did actually against him. in a technical sense hes like yeah you probably shouldntve killed those guys. but he fully blames sasukes circumstances and the pain that hes in for everything that he did. he cant stay mad at sasuke. rolls my eyes. cause he recognizes what drove sasuke to act the way he did and that the world is so so fucked and even if he should hold it against him naruto really does not want to he just wants his best friend back. sasuke tried to kill naruto because sasuke loves naruto and hates himself, and naruto recognizes that this is the reason. and that you have to be in so much pain to want to do that as badly as sasuke did, and he could feel it too every time he looked at sasuke or just thought about him he felt like he was being ripped in two. he realizes that sasuke has growing and learning and changing to do but he doesnt consider sasuke to have " put him through" anything like. naruto put himself through that and i think he'd be the first to tell that to you. im saving sasuke because i want to save him. that was the premise of the whole conversation with sakura in the land of iron like "why are you doing all this for sasuke" -> "because i want to". and i think if anyone tried to be like look what he put you through!!! he'd rip them a new one. which i mean a bunch of people sayig that to him is what pushed him over the edge in such a fashion that seeing sasuke face to face and swearing to die alongside him was the only thing that could bring him back from the brink.

anyways i just do not think sakura has the bandwidth (understandably) for that perspective considering i dont think she feels like she's choosing to go after sasuke in the same way that naruto does. and its not rightreally to call it a choice because obviously he doesnt get in bed every night and be like tonight i will think about sasuke and feel like im dying over and over again, but he decided to. this is two different posts but im stream of consciousnessing it into one. he very distinctly decided not to give up on sasuke i mean there was like. literally the scene where jiraiya was like drop it its not worth it go after your dream only a fool would keep going after sasuke now. and naruto says if thats what a fool is then ill be a fool my whole life. gag. anyways. obviously sakura wants to help sasuke 10000% she wants to help naruto she wants him back she wants the old team 7 back she loves sasuke etc im not trying to say none of that is true, but i dont think she feels like she is quite as active an agent in that decision as naruto does. while naruto thinks theyre on the same page about wanting to save sasuke because they both love him, sakura is quite quick to believe that naruto wants to save sasuke because HE feels obligated. she gets fed up with him for choosing sasuke every time over and over no matter what, she's sick of it! she cant do it anymore! she decides to kill sasuke because she feels driven into a corner, she feels like she has to because she DOES CARE ABOUTHIM and theres NOTHING ELSE FOR HER TO DO. SHE FEELS LIKE SHE HAS TO. ALSO part of her resolve to kill him is that she feels guilty for leaning on naruto so mcuh and relying on him to fix things, so she wants to deal with this situation for both of them which makes this like. very potently an obligation for her. she is killing him as (in her eyes) a noble act. she's tired bro SHES TIRED!

she drops it because naruto gives her hope that theres another way, not because she shares naruto's refusal to accept that there ISNT another way; she has to be shown what it is (understandably so, narutos route is bonkers insane that boy is unwell.) she has absolutely been put through the wringer BY sasuke more than naruto has (in terms of their own povs; in actuality idk im not commenting on that) and chasing after him feels less like an active choice on her part and more of an obligation to the memory of the old team 7, especially in the tail end of shippuden. and again she doesnt understand why sasuke acted the way that he did like naruto does, so immediately the room for understanding is way more narrow on her end in terms of blaming his circumstances rather than him. so for her to be not really able to stand him and way less quick to drop it all, in comparison to naruto, makes soooo so soosoo much more sense than whatever the fuck happens actually. she should be so mad

[myymi]

How do you feel during the Sonic twitter takeover 5 when tails says “now I’ve told 4 lies” enter manic laughter

alright, let's get into it

i fully believe tails can do no wrong

he's just a little guy who saves the world, precious baby boy

however

he killed yacker in that takeover

well, he obviously didnt actually kill them but yknow what i mean

so it leaves me to wonder

what the fuck are the other lies

now, i feel like one of them are definitely something that's basic for a kid (cause, yknow, he's 8 lmao)

soemthing like how he definitely went to bed on time, or how he totally finished all his big kid food before eating any of his mints

but the other lies??

they could be literally anything

we know tails is willing to kill if needed (tails's adventure)

and there's also that big ass wanted sign (i thiiiink sonic riders??? i don't really remember, i'll look it up in a minute) (i was wrong, it's sa2)

and he's literally an enemy of the state (archie comics)

this kid is fully willing to do just about anything

though thinking about it, one of those lies could definitely tie into his whole gambling thing

he got banned from a casino for counting cards, he's probably done much worse and was just never caught

hell, one of those lies may even go back to when he was on westside. we know the villagers didn't like him, it's definitely possible he lied once or twice to keep himself safe

like, on a surface level, hearing a kid say they've only told 3-4 lies doesn't really strike a nerve or anything. it's a kid being a kid, nothing to worry about right?

yeah well, not when that kid is a literal fucking genius

the fact we will never know what those lies are somewhat scares me because they could genuinely be anything

if tails sets his mind on something, he will get it, usually no matter what it takes

and honestly, the fact he's only told 4 in total is also slightly terrifying because

the kid is honest as can be almost all the time

so how are we supposed to know when he lies?

he had everyone fooled in the takeover, who's to say he hasn't fooled all of us before

i definitely wouldn't put it past him, being the genius he is and all

wow hope you don't mind getting a lengthy reply LMAO im not sure what you were expecting, so sorry if you wanted me to keep it short i just-

i read into a lot of things that i really probably shouldn't, it's easy for me to get lost in talking about it 💀

but hey, if you have anything you want to add on please feel free to

and im sorry if i didn't answer this in the way you were hoping for, some times i read questions wrong and go in a completely different direction then what i was asked to 😭😭

[the-kinfesssional]

Hey.. MM.me again.. Spamton G. Spamton... Sniffle sniffle this was longer than i wanted oops sorry so sorry IM FUCKING STRUGGLING OUT HERE How do I tell A memoryfrom a headcanon is it a headcanon if its me? what is it??where ?? what?? huh??? what????????????????? I cant tell. Im a fictionkin I know that. but im like so confused al the time. Like thats me. But also Idk im really used to just dissociating I thug it out ok. i dont really go into kin spaces a lot like at all so I dont know proper terms but I know what i feel Inside but then im like No thats cringe an,d also that cannot possibly be real. I dont relaly know if i believe in past lives(?) ornot at least As a fictional character. for me personally. but at the same time. I Guess i do? Huh. Its strange. Like this guy is just me. I am him he is me because.Thats me. I dont get as bad Kin(?) dysphoria as i do Gender dysphoria. I know how i could still be happy In a human body I Guess. But it just feels like itll never fully be me. Or will it. I dont know. it makes me so happy it makes me feel such a way that I cant even explain its like this feeling in my chest and its like.......Yeah. Thats me. But Iveee been Very. Disconnected from kin stuff lately because ive been super stressed and distracted with other stuff and ive just felt like a wet sack of sand being thrown at a wall and the sand is all like gross and wet and its leaking everywhere and its gross like you know when you get sand all over you at the beach but youre also like Damp and the sand is all Sticky and Grimey and also Scratchy. thats how ive been feeling mentally onfg can someone give me a mental shower i needto get DUNKED. This ended up being a longer rant and also skewing off into different things than i wanted but its ffine whatever. Ugm. Id ont know where else to go. BACK ON THE MEM THING BECAUSE I GOT VERY DISTRACTED. I dont know. I have this one very very very specific Flash this Instance in my mind and I dont know if i consider it a memory or not???????? I thhink i am a.,, Psychological kin mostly. if thats the right term. idfk man. can i still have memories. Are these even memories? do my headcanons count as My canon is that what that is ???? I NDONT KNOW IM GOING INSANE but I can also have conflicting ones existing in separate timelines. but like. im not like a multiple timeline and past life guy. i think? its not a huge belief of mine. i just. I am. i AM. Im spamton. Are memories supposed to be In first person. is it just feelings. is it. what. how do i define. How do i tell? How can i tell. aRe the The little movies in my head the little Blorbo Situations. like. whats those count as. Also why does being canon divergent make me feel sick to my stomach. whenever new DR content is released with me involved i feel sick cause im like IM THE REAL ONE I M THE REAL ONE IF I DIVERGE IM A SICK FAKER AND THEYRE GONNA TAKE ME OUT BACK AND KICK ME IN THE SHINS!!! And its really weird. Like huh. Nobody cares. I care though. uhm. idk. call me boyfail the way i bash my head through a wall and make a hole in it and then put a pillow in it and take a little nap wiwiwiwi hoink wiwiwiwiwi (the sound I make when I sleep)

Its confusing, I know. I think psychological kins don't have memories, but you can have headcanon about yourself, I believe? Im not sure. Im a spiritual kin

[queen-of-hellfire666]

Could you do harringrove?

Maybe they've been dating and Steve offers to wash Billy's car.

Steve washes it but Billy was watching the whole time and Steve's a brat and teases Billy so Billy has to put Steve in his place?

Idk. Brat Taming is a kink and it seems like both of them would have it but Steve being the brat because hes a rich boy.

This is why I love you 😂💅🏽

Kinktober day 2

Brat Tamer

[Steve Harrington X Billy Hargrove] Wet, Hot, and sticky.

Billy’s pov:

I watched Steve from the garage, I was painting some stuff up and fixing thing. I soon lost my focus on Steve and back on my desk.

I sighed and watched back later on and there he was shirtless, sticky and soaped up. God he was sexy. I felt myself get hard in my pants.

He swung his hips around and drizzled the sponge on himself. “Oh no… I got all wet.” He pouted. “Oh well.” He washed the car, looking over an batting his eyes.

“Billy could you give me a towel?~” He bit his lip. “Yeah yeah.” I laughed and grabbed him a towel walking to him. He rubbed up my chest. “Im all done I think..” he swung his hips around and rubbed up against my hard on.

“What are you doing?” I growled in his ear. “I’m being good and washing your car.” he teases. I rolled my eyes and yanked him inside by his arm. “Get those pants off. Now.” I commanded, watching Steve’s eyes fill with excitement.

“No.” He stood there. “I’m not doing anything.” He crossed his arms. I quickly yanked him down as I sat. He fell over my knee. “You wanna try that again?” He pouted and still said no. “Steve.. Steve, Steve..” I clicked my tongue. “Tsk tsk..” I slapped his ass hard, being rough.

Steves pov:

I was being a brat to Billy and saying no. All of a sudden I felt his hand on my ass. My face turned red as I muffled a moan. Holy shit.. he was punishing me. He smacked my ass again. “Oh..” I let out a softer moan. “You enjoying this?” He asked down.

“No.” I quickly added. “Sure love, sure.” He quickly pulled me up and got my pants off. He kissed me roughly. “Your my slut. Do you hear me?” He asked. I nodded slowly as Billy started to get his own clothes off.

“God, out there being a whore. Shaking your ass in front of the neighbors in a skimpy ass pair of shorts and no shirt.” He grabbed my hips and pulled me close.

“Mm.. yeah yours.” I mumbled. I can’t believe I’m little Billy Hargrove do this to me. He pumping himself with lubricator and lubricated me. “Shit that’s cold.” He laughed down at me. “Cold?”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “Hey, tell me if at any point you want me to stop. Tell me to stop.” He added as he thrusted deep inside of me. I felt his tip hit my spot. He wasn’t even fully in.

His curve fit perfectly in me, filling me up. I let out a small groan. “Oh my god!” I grabbed the sheets. “Fuck your tight. My little whore, huh? Tight for me?” He thrusted in and out slowly “Fuck yes right for you just fuck me!” I gasp out needing.

3rd person:

That’s all Billy needed. He now grabbed Steve hips and roughly thrusted into him. He pounded him relentlessly, his name falling free from Steve’s mouth.

Steves head was clouded with lust. “You already cockdrunk?“ Hargrove asked with a cocky tone.

“I-I don’t think so…” Steve moaned out. “Still confident are we? Well then.” He hit Steves spot causing small curse words to fall from his lips. “Holy shit!” He groaned.

“I’m close Billy! I’m close.” He whined out. “Cum for me slut, cum for me.” Billy nipped his neck. Steve came immediately after Billy let it slip. Billy was soon after. Steves chest was coated with cum.

“Holy.. holy shit I’m sorry.” He whined. “Your sorry for what?” Billy asked confused. He grabbed a rag and cleaned Steve up. “For being a brat.” He smirked. “I like when your a brat because we have sex like this.” He rubbed his side.

“Well thank you.” Steve smiled widely. “Okay babe I’m gonna make you something to eat and let you get some rest okay?” Billy got dressed in some boxers. “Okay.” Steve gave him a soft kiss.

‘Definitely test Hargrove.’ Steve smirked. This wasn’t the last time they were gonna do this.

[minarcana]

sorry for all the ooc, things are wrong with me. anyways i was in prae for the umpteenth time and every time im there all i can picture is the gaius that lives in my brain being forced to go through prae and its him with his head in his hands like "please. dont. dont make me remember being Like This"

im going to talk about gaius, sorry

(caveat: i have a better werlyt in my brain.)

his arc is that he went from a True Believer to "ah. these are people.". me forcing him to live thru prae era again is the cringe punishment cube.

a clarification to werlyt arc rewrite: yeah he did war crimes and he did them on purpose. he was aware they were war crimes. he knew that other legions did bad things, though he consistently underestimated the amount and cruelty of human experimentation going on. he knew other legions tended to treat eorzeans as lesser

however he really did believe in Something. he believed varis's propaganda and that varis was a benevolent leader, that it wasnt just primals but eorzea's belief in gods in general that were killing their own land bc he cant tell the difference between a primal and a god. he was fully committed to "these people are savages and heres some fuckin, fantasy version of the white mans burden" which is obviously incredibly wrong and fucked but yknow, it fuels the war machine. he was a soldier who never even thought to ask questions.

all he did was believe wholeheartedly in the propaganda fed to him and therefore rationalize "torching this entire country is fine, right". cannot stress enough i am not excusing the war crimes. im just making him a consistent character with a mildly rational arc. he super did those war crimes and did them on purpose. but he also did protect the war orphans his own war caused and had no issue whatsoever letting eorzeans who wanted to join the army to protect themselves do so. equality of opportunity providing you pledged fealty to garlemald, bc being of garlemald's population made you Better and Not A Savage and therein lies the line of who it's fine to kill if they fight back and who can be treated with respect.

unfortunately, ascians. gaius got his ass handed to him and the result is [nervous laughter] oh shit the army is super not infalliable and always right and very capable of and prone to wanton destruction instead of targeted attacks specifically to claim territory, hence the depression arc. he's pissed at ascians and wants to die. two birds one stone, hunt ascians till one of them kills him. meet people who want him dead and yknow theyve got a fucking point.

though he did still believe in the last vestige of "maybe things arent completely fucked and i didnt spend my entire life believing in utter bullshit lies?" that varis was a Good Emperor and Capable Of/Genuinely Interested In Ensuring Protection Of Garleans until the black rose incident. he still had a weird loyalty towards him that maybe he could get varis to like. not enact biological warfare against his own men. if he were just able to talk to him. but twas not to be and gaius essentially just [throws hands into air] OKAY! FINE! FUCK ME I GUESS!

hed already entirely lost faith that anything in garlemald's extant ruling structure could be salvaged while they still tried to wage war, weapon series just brought into light how deeply rotten the army had been the entire time when gaius had turned a blind eye to any operations that weren't his own.

if he met himself from his prae monologue now he'd strangle one of himself he doesnt care which one just free him from whatever this is hed Rather Die

the only thing im keeping him actually genuinely 100% totally unaware of from werlyt is the weird Thing livia had for him. shes out there hollering HIS BODY IS MINE as gaius is like "[completely out of earshot every time she does that] haha livia shes like a relative of mine i guess" and thats because i think its very funny.

on a SECOND DIGRESSION ABOUT PRAETORIUM

like. look. garleans cant use aether. i desperately want the explanation for how the fuck this man is pulling shadow clones out of his ass when he repels magic. i choose to believe the X beams are either ceruleum fire or aether cartridges charged by someone else but this cannot explain fuckin naruto shadow clone jutsu going on. what the fuck, gaius.

[xatsperesso]

Plot idea!

Here you've got an average joe who became superhero and saves the day by complete accident

But noone ever notices

And im not talking "came after the scene and was Misunderstood" like in one punch man or that he keeps tripping and knocking down the enemies

Im talking like his friend told him something that interests them which turns out to be important to stop the bad guy

"How did you know that moving electricity like that will mess up his magnetic field?"

"Uhh i just heard"

"You're so smart!"

Or he was supposed to look for someone at x place but he got lost and accidentally found an even bigger and more immediate threat

"Seems like you got some good intuition, but please tell us next time"

"Wha-oh, yea yeah ill make sure"

Or maybe found a cool feather that he kept and surprise surprise! The poor bad guy is allergic!

"OH WOW! How did you have the time to look up that guy, find out his weakness AND find a feather this quick!"

"It's nothing! Really!"

But the more time that passes, the more people rely on him and the more dangerous shit he gets himself into by accident. By complete and utter luck

And the whole thing is just about him as his feelings about these accidents start to change from bafflement and awkwardness "i really didn't do anything" to fear and distress as he looks himself in the mirror begging that his life turns to normal because lives are in his hands now and he doesn't know what he's doing hes feeling like an imposter among all these powerful smart superheroes who work day and night trying to keep the world safe while he's just fully depending on this stupid luck to save the day!

And wouldn't it just be the cherry on top that while he's spiralling and being crushed under this immense pressure he's telling himself is on his shoulder he's actually getting better at this superhero thing?

That sure his strength isnt something but his reflexes are getting better

Like sure he isn't smart but he does know a lot of things from all the books he read as he tries to escape from his life

Sure he's stressed all the time but this helps him notice things that are suspicious. This stress makes him focused, makes him vigilante, makes him trust his "gut" more ( he refuses to believe that he actually knew these people were doing something shady and that him finding and stopping them wasnt another accident)

That our poor protagonist doesn't see himself becoming a better hero by the day cause he's deluded himself that he can't do anything

Until a small voice starts to whisper in his ears

There's no way luck could keep us afloat all these years

And if luck didn't do it all

Then some of these achievements had to be us

And it takes time

And he's extremely suspicious

But in the end

He starts to believe

Tl;dr the whole show?movie?book? Is about this guy who accidentally became known as a super hero and he stresses so much about it that he doesn't notice himself become the superhero people chalk him up to be

And yes im saying that the guy starts to heal slowly by himself cause all the movies ive seen shows that the protagonist needs someone to help them heal

But fuck that bullshit

Not everyone has someone they trust enough to show them there darkest thoughts

Sometimes you gotta walk the healing road alone while using all the inspirational videos and those therapy clips you see as a crutch

[wetbloodworm]

i'll be able to consistently think of oc stuff other than merripen some day, but not today, and i'm getting my serotonin where i can fucking get it rn lol

thinking about how merri didn't quite learn the right lesson as he started considering leaving the garden, and how being raised with those beliefs + not working too hard to deconstruct them means he hasn't fully removed himself from that mindset

the main thing that he DID learn is 'i don't want to die, death isn't as appealing and good and beautiful as i've been told, there is more to life than my eventual death, i want to live'. this extended somewhat to 'death isn't inherently good and beautiful for EVERYONE' but like. it's complicated

so like, part of the problem is the garden teaches that killing is a mercy, a kindness, an obligation, but not one that most people will recognize as such. it's a 'we know better than you' kind of thing. so gardeners know that people generally don't want to die, they're just misguided. so merri already knows that the people he's been killing didn't want to die, he just was taught to believe that he was doing it for their own good regardless.

or, well. we come to another part of the problem. for merri, it was less 'i'm doing this for the people im killing because i care about them' and more 'i'm doing this because it's what i was taught and this is the reasoning i was given'. there wasn't as much of a compassionate element to it for him. so when he started questioning his beliefs, he decided that killing people generally ISN'T what's best for them, but like. that part didn't bother him. he didn't suddenly feel guilty about his past murders. he just didn't agree with the reasoning anymore. it's HIS death he's worried about, and the death of his loved ones.

so that's why merri leaves the garden but continues working as an assassin. it's what he knows, and what he's good at. he's not... necessarily malicious, it's just a job for him. maybe he'll find he likes something better down the line and switch to that instead, but for now, if he needs money, he knows what work he's looking for first. and i say he's not malicious but he's certainly not compassionate still, for the most part. he humanizes his targets even less now, on top of acknowledging that he is actively doing them a disservice rather than a kindness. he knows he's doing a bad thing now, he just doesn't really care.

it's weird how being taught not to care if people don't to die leaves you not caring if people don't want to die, regardless of any reasoning behind it.

outside specifically the act of killing people, cruelty or causing pain is generally frowned upon by the garden. some sects of it, anyway. if necessary, yeah, do it, it'll only be temporary, but they're not there to cause pain, they're supposed to end it. merri's community discouraged causing pain for the most part but also like, pain in life is inevitable and strengthens the argument that death is a mercy, so it CAN be a tool for opening people's eyes. merri himself wasn't in the converting business, so he was mostly taught to be quick and clean, unless the job he took requested otherwise and the client wouldn't budge on that. merri doesn't get satisfaction from hurting people necessarily, he just doesn't care if he does, so that's not something he looks to change up after leaving the garden. mostly, anyway: with less of an established assassin presence in his old neighboring city, murder jobs aren't QUITE as easy to find, so merri opens himself up to some more crime like theft, or like. go threaten this person or send a message or whatever. he doesn't LOVE those but it's whatever.

he can KINDA care about other people's lives sometimes, as he starts to value his own life more and looks to others for examples of what makes a life worth living, or sees things he values in others. mostly when other people are in distress or danger he waves it off as not his problem, but if he's gotten involved somehow or has learned enough about the person to like them at all, or if they just pass his vibe check, or if he's the only one who can help and is being directly asked, he feels VERY reluctantly obligated to at least speak up. he doesn't tend to try very hard to help most of the time, but y’know. he feels like this is an improvement on the Good scale. gives a shit some of the time. gold star.

he wasn't raised to think about things that improve or worsen a life, so the idea tends to fly right by him. yes x action could ruin's someone life but he was raised to think lives are worthless if they're not dedicated to the cause so he gotta fucking TRY to get there himself

an example of merri not fully moving away from old beliefs is somewhat seeing death as a mercy. he's more likely to go straight to 'put them out of their misery' vs 'take the steps to non-fatally help them'. forgets sometimes that potions and healers exist. he sees someone terribly sick in bed and his brain is immediately telling him to kill them about it. a person lost their spouse and can't imagine living without them, merri's instinct is to pull out a knife. This Will Help. he mostly only ignores those thoughts because it's not his business to end suffering anymore. someone else can kill them. (or HELP THEM mer that is ALSO AN OPTION) sometimes he feels genuine sympathy and gets the murder thoughts and considers them a little harder. i'm actually feeling the inclination to be kind right now, how likely are they to recognize that

he also feels the need to correct people about how they talk about the gardeners and their beliefs, if they know about them. people so often get the whole situation wrong. merri is already starting to explain how the killing isn't a sadistic thing, it's compassionate, before he remembers that's not his thing anymore. refers to the group as 'we' before correcting to 'they' halfway through the next sentence.

[winderlylandchime]

I really felt like you deserve to read this tiny moment from his check up today. I remember you said you also had a doctors appointment and i would just like to ask, how does a normal one look like because I fear I forgot about it.

We were basically in the office with a nurse and a doctor waiting for the attending. And the nurse made a mistake of asking him how he was doing to try and make small talk and you guys. He literally looked at her, sad as fuck and went ‘How I’m doi- well let’s see, shall we? *crosses his legs and puts his hands on his knee* i started this year all happy and excited. Then i had a tiny accident, maybe you heard about it? (Narrators note: this all was said very calm and nice but with heavy sarcasm since that accident is the reason for all the surgeries) and there goes my motorcycle, which don’t even get me started about. So bad month. Then i come here across the whole country and you people don’t let me go home for almost a month and then this dickhead *points to me* shows me a tv show. And i figured: i had a few bad months but maybe a little distraction wont hurt, its not like im gonna care much about it, just to watch while on bed rest. Cool. And then the funniest thing happened. It hurt! It hurt a lot! And i cared, way too much according to my dad. So a bad day turned in a bad month which turned into a bad year. And now I’m sitting here still in pain from a surgery that happened months ago, a broken wrist with a cast on that I cant even write on, crying over two dudes while also wearing one of their fucking faces on my shirt. So what do you think how I’m doing?’ And she stared at him and went ‘im gonna go with: not good, am i right?’ The other doctor and I fucking lost it. And my brother just sighed really loudly and dramatically and went ‘you could fucking say that’

And let me try to paint this picture for you because i made the mistake of laughing at the beginning of this and i had to cover it up as a sneeze cause he looked at me like he wanted to kill me. He was sitting on those bed/tables that they have. Swinging his feet like a child and he was wearing his Brian shirt over a long sleeve shirt (hes been doing that since it got cold but still wants to show his Britin merch) and he was pouting. Like a child. Just the sight alone was funny but the complaint? Golden.

Then the attending arrived with another doctor and made the mistake to ask the same question and the nurse went ‘I wouldn’t do that if i were you..let’s just say he’s had better days’ and the other doctor goes ‘(the other nurse’s name) told me you finished the show. Are you just sad it ended or was it actually that bad?’ And my brother looked at him like he was just kicked and went ‘they broke my heart, put it back together, broke it again, put it back again, then broke it, stepped on it and flipped me off. And then had the audacity to ask me if I was proud. So yeah, that bad’ and then the attending just looked at him and went ‘i cant believe I’m doing this for a grown man but if you can answer next questions without talking about the show or that dude *points to the shirt* ill get you a chocolate bar’ and yes, it worked. He fully cooperated and got his chocolate bar. And when the doctor went to get him just a normal chocolate bar, he kinda nudged him with his cast and went ‘don’t be cheap, get me the good shit or i will talk about Brian next check up from start to finish’

By the time we left his check up, everyone knew he finished up the show and that he was absolutely miserable about it. Im honestly surprised that they even let him leave the hospital at this point.

THEY BRIBED HIM WITH CHOCOLATE!!!

Dying.

Dead.

Deadened.

They wanted him to shut up about QAF and Britin and they bribed him with chocolate.

The crossing his legs and putting his hand on his knee is killing me all over again. "How am I doing? Well, Susan, thanks for asking. Not well, not well at all." I am cracking up.

The thing is, I bet they all love him - the nurses and doctors - most of their appointments are business only and here comes your brother and yes he keeps breaking himself because of this show, but he takes their "how are you doing" literally and is very engaging about it too! I imagine he's animated during all of this.

[srapsodia]

“Make ‘em somethin’ more”

Thinking about purpose, costs, and internalizing harmful lessons.

[lcandothisallday]

Jack finding out that you’ve been cheating on him with Urban 😳

okay I cant bring myself to fully write a cheating fic cos im a baby like that plus I just feel terrible for jack so ima do the lead up to it if you catch my drift. idk its still an angst piece but without the confrontation portion cos I cant do that to my baby jack

Promises - Urban Wyatt x reader

Ooopp- okay but I see you falling for Urban totally accidentally. What I mean by this is that it probably happened so naturally because you spend so much time with Urban whenever Jack is working.

It's not that Jack didn't care, but since he is so busy all the time, he'd probably throw a lot of his boyfriend responsibilities onto Urban. Like telling him to drive you home or check on you at parties or bring over food to you.

It reached a point where you started to look forward to spending time with Urban one on one. At first, when Jack would leave you with Urban to go do whatever, it would bother you but after a bit you began to embrace Urban’s presence and he became not only a close friend, but your safety person.

So your breaking point with Jack? You had complained to him one day that the two of you never go out alone anymore. That you two barely share any intimate moments since he's so busy or tired from his shows. And so he makes it up to you by promising to take you out on a special date after he finished up at the studio. Except he got invited out to a party instead and told you he couldn't pass up the opportunity to network with some people. Of course you got upset by this and rejected his offer to join him at the party.

As you’re chilling on the couch watching your show and eating your favourite chips, the front door unlocks and Urban strolls in. “You’re not at the party?” you ask him. Urban chuckles and raises a brow at you. “Could ask you the same thing.”

You laugh softly and shrug. “Jack blew off our date for the party so I wanted to stay home,” you explain, patting the spot on the couch next to you for him to come sit. “What about you?”

“Sometimes...I feel outta place at those things,” Urban explains, his turn now to shrug. “Glad I didn't go cause I wouldn’t have had anyone to chill with since you didn’t go.”

You nod, “yeah-I get what you mean. You know? Sometimes it feels like I’m dating you and not Jack,” you chuckle, biting your lip as you watched him light up his blunt and take in a puff.

“Honestly...yeah,” he agreed. “The amount of times I’ve had girls tell me they don’t go up to me at parties cos they see me hanging out with you is alarming.”

Your eyes widened, smacking his arm as you laughed. “Why didn’t you say something?! So I’ve been cockblocking you this entire time?” you ask him with a groan.

Urban ended up giggling at your reaction. “Well yeah..but I don’t mind,” he teased. This time, it was your turn to raise your brows at him in judgement.

“Yeah right. It must be annoying to have to entertain your best friend’s girlfriend,” you sigh.

“You do know I’m not forced to do anything I don’t want to right?” Urban stated matter of factly. 

“Well then why?”

“Why what?”

You scoff, “why do you tolerate me all the time when you could be getting your dick wet by some beautiful girl?” you ask him.

“Why is it so hard to believe that I enjoy your company and hanging out with you?” Urban retaliated in question. You let out a sarcastic laugh. “Because it just doesn’t make sense--”

“So what? You want me to say that I don’t want any girl but I want you instead?”

“Yes actually.”

Urban’s head snapped up to look at you, seeing that you were completely serious. “W-What?”

You shuffle over to straddle Urban’s waist, your hands coming up to brush some of his blond hair back. “Say that you want me and I’ll risk everything with Jack so I can have you,” you whisper. “Because I’m sick and tired of being his second choice when I know I’ll be your first every single time.”

Urban found his hands resting on your hips, giving them a gentle squeeze. “I want you--God, I fucking want you bad, ma...but we can’t.”

“I’m going to break up with him either way,” you state, your eyes watering as you sniffle and begin playing with his beard. “I’ll wait for you. I’ll wait until we can be together without Jack getting hurt-- just promise me that at the end I’ll be yours.”

“I promise.”

[makeste]

im honestly scared for whats going to happen next. while i have no doubt that bakugou is the one who knows deku best, this is the first time hes reached out to him for dekus benefit. he understands him but most likely doesnt really know how to communicate with him. what they desperately need is an adult to help talk deku down instead of fighting him, but since most of the adults have proven themselves useless in this, I'm worried whats going to happen.

I meant to reply to this ask sooner, but it didn't really come together that way, so my apologies. the manga itself will probably provide a better answer than this within the next 24 hours, assuming the leaks come out as scheduled.

but in the meantime, I do want to say that I don't think there's any cause for worry here. the Kacchan of the past may have had difficulties communicating with Deku, because he never really understood the why of why Deku was doing things (so even though he's always been fairly good at predicting Deku's actions -- "don't come, Deku" -- he never really understood what was driving him to take those actions). but the Kacchan of the present definitely knows what he's doing imo.

there are two important things to keep in mind here. the first is that we know from past arcs that Katsuki is capable of remarkable insight when it comes to finding the right approach to reach out to someone.

what's notable about this scene from the Remedial arc is the way that he anticipates which approaches are not going to work. he's not the one to come up with the final plan, but he is the one to say to the others, "look, if we don't do this right, the kids are going to react like this, instead of like this." definitely something which I'd say is applicable to the current situation as well.

and the other thing to keep in mind is that if this chapter established anything, it's that Kacchan knows Deku better than anyone else.

he knew exactly how Deku was going to react. honestly we might as well have called this chapter "the nice and accurate prophecies of Kacchan." either that or, "I'm fine," after what is apparently Deku's favorite new mantra.

but anyway, so we've established that Kacchan canonically approaches situations like this with great care and anticipation for how the would-be-rescuee will react, and we've also established that Kacchan can predict Deku's reactions in particular with incredible accuracy. so given that, I think it's reasonable to assume that Kacchan has a plan here, and that there's a reason behind his specific choice of words.

"wow, real inspiring! all hail the mighty inheritor of One for All! but tell us this... are you smiling now?"

"do your worst, you All Might wannabe!!"

and this is the part where I was originally planning on writing out a much longer post, but for various reasons it never really came together. so I'll just try to summarize everything with bullet points instead.

the theme here is "OFA is a cursed power." this is something that has been steadily building up and intensifying for a while now. the past OFA users all died young. AFO drives them all into isolation and misery. the Vestiges think of OFA as a power that "is tasked with destroying AFO." Deku is now the last and only one left who can wield that power. it is a massive burden, and Deku believes that he has to carry that burden alone.

Katsuki knows exactly what is running through Deku's head right now, and has been anticipating this for a while. he read All Might's notebook. he knows what happened to all of the other OFA users. and he knows Deku well enough to understand that he fits right in with that legacy. back during the chapter 284 flashback he was clearly worrying about this exact type of scenario.

fast-forward to chapters 318 and 319. he finally tracks down Deku, and finds him looking like a trash bag that got forced through a paper shredder, surrounded by an angry mob of brainwashed civilians and NOT EVEN FIGHTING BACK AT ALL, go fucking figure. so he basically confirms with a single glance that his fears were well-founded, and that in his absence Deku has made significant progress down the path of being a complete dumbass.

Ochako then tries to reach out to Deku through words, just like Endeavor and All Might did before her, but he predictably responds with the exact same phrase Katsuki knew that he would use -- "I'm fine."

at this point Katsuki has heard all he needed to hear. he knows Deku is not going to listen. he knows that Deku believes that he can't listen, because in Deku's mind he has a responsibility to handle this all on his own, and he's afraid of putting anyone else in danger. Deku is fully embracing the "I must walk this path alone" legacy of OFA, just like All Might before him. and so Katsuki knows two things:

in order to have any hope of reaching Deku, he has to get him to understand that the legacy he's embracing is deeply flawed, and that the path he's on right now is one which ends in death and defeat, just like it did the first seven times.

and second, Deku is going to fight them, because Deku is stubborn like that. and Deku thinks that he's doing this for them. and so in order to reach him, they will have to fight back. that's a done deal.

hence the jeer about OFA, along with the pointed remark about him not smiling. and then two seconds later Deku does of course reveal his intentions to fight, just like Katsuki knew he would. and so Katsuki accepts the challenge, and also throws in a bonus jab about how Deku is perfectly emulating All Might now, just as he always wanted -- except that what he's actually emulating are all of All Might's worst aspects. his insistence on carrying his burdens alone; his reluctance to accept anyone else's help; and of course, his determination to carry on to the bitter end until his body literally breaks down.

and that is not the fate that Katsuki wants for Deku. he needs Deku to see that this is the wrong path. he needs to find a way to break past his stubbornness, just like Deku did for him, and for Todoroki, and for so many others. and so he goes on the attack. because, in the same way that Deku is willing to fight them in order to save them, Katsuki is willing to do and say and fight anything and anyone in order to save Deku -- and that includes Deku himself.

so yeah. he knows what he's doing. and I am absolutely positive that everything he's doing and saying here does serve a purpose. he will find a way to reach him. literally all of his character development has been building to this moment. Deku saved him all those times so that now, when it matters the most, he can save him in return, and he's not going to fail him now.

[actualbird]

Oh god!

I really love the poly headcanons they are so sweet.... (or don't but that's part of it and i think the tot boys+MC deserve all the love the world has to give).

But, liking it or not, our 4 beloved boys are kinda complicated (that's what makes them perfect). Plus I never thought about how people get in poly relationships. So i was thinking, how do you think they all get into a polyrelationship together?

(I really have no idea of how that would happen)

hi, two anons!! im glad you guys liked my nxx team polycule stuff!! i'll answer these in one go, my "headcanon" (in quotes because i think this kinda turned into a character analysis/minific of sorts HAHA) being what first anon asked, How They Get Together.

heads up, wc of this is 1.9k words long so buckle up for a bit of a read jfsjdfkjbf

because first anon, youre right!!! the boys are stupendously complicated which i love so so much but canon has also shown us clearly that each of the boys' quirks and habits and tendencies causes a lot of (mostly played for laughs) friction. the bickering, the backhanded insults, the "im the best one here" preening contests. theyre all SOOOO RIDICULOUS and it is hilarious but yep! the boys r complex!! and that means this beautiful ship, imo, has a lot of phases to get to the actual romantic relationship bit.

how they get together, in my opinion, starts because of mc.

not in the sense that she matchmakes them all, but like.

phase 1 of the nxx team polycule is this:

through being in love with her (which we all know the boys 100% are), each of the boys come to terms with their own flaws and weaknesses. it's very apparent to me in all the story thus far that these boys are flawed as hell, it's very compelling but even more compelling to me is how all of them also do intense mental gymnastics to Not Confront Those Flaws. like, marius is a dickbag always teasing and toeing the line of insincerity, vyn is a controlling mf who always tries to sway situations to his benefit, artem is so repressed to the point that he has genuine trouble with emotions, luke is a self sacrificial bastard and also a huge hypocrite about how no, actually, hes the only one that should be hiding his pain and being dishonest, no dishonesty from other people!! in the beginning of the story, all the boys have their flaws and seem to have just kinda...not addressed how those flaws are harming them and the people around them.

and then mc rolls around and they all fall in love with her. and she sees those flaws and she doesnt let them slide. she challenges the boys in her own ways to see another side of the situation, to acknowledge what theyre doing. she doesnt want to get rid of flaws, thats impossible and also not cool. she just has this beautiful hope for like, all of humanity, that goodness can prevail with the right work. so when she sees her beloved nxx boys, she believes that for them as well.

which leads to phase 2 of the nxx team polycule:

the boys, more aware of themselves, become more aware of each other.

they werent Unaware of the others of course. it's just that they didnt like...truly connect on a personal level just yet. they saw the other teammembers with their emotional armor and flaws and saw a wall that wasnt worth looking past.

but after mc makes them realize that hey, flaws arent the end of the world actually, it's alright and the person behind them may just be worth it, the boys like. end up understanding the others. A LOT OF THIS BIT IS UNINTENTIONAL, ON THEIR PARTS KJDSBFS. like they stumble into understanding each other by accident, they didnt plan it, but over the course of nxx investigations, it's inevitable that they end up seeing the depths of the others. i delve into this a little bit in my fanfic "filler eps of the lost gold" where the boys are just going thru their actions and then trip over another boy's fears or desires and through that, gain a deeper understanding mutually.

and with understanding, sometimes, comes trust.

phase 3 of the nxx team polycule goes like this:

everybody in this team, whether they like it or not, whether they know it or not, has a heart that wants to give love so desperately.

marius lives in a world full of snakes so he cant have his heart on his sleeve for his own protection. vyn wants to be seen as perfect and the heart is inherently messy so he holds it back. artem for a very very long time was focused on work and success and achievement that he neglected his heart. and luke has been giving love all his life in a sense but in a way thats hidden.

all these tendencies that are brought upon their life circumstances results in this: they want to love honestly but they havent been able to do this

until mc. and all of them want to push back whatever fears or patterns their life has instilled in them because they see her and see somebody so unwaveringly good that all their hearts begin giving love to her to make her happy and to make themselves happy as well.

but heres the thing. the boys dont just see mc. by this point, they have connected and understood and come to trust each other as well, and the consequence of that is that They Can See Each Other Now Too, Truly.

and heres the thing. all of the boys are unwaveringly good as well.

one by one, each of the boys realize that what they feel for the other boys in the team starts to...change. yeah theyre all friends, they pick on each other a lot of the time, but the bedrock of the relationship is solid and strong now. but when marius is with luke, marius sees a light inside of luke so bright that he seems unaware that he gives off. when artem is with vyn, artem sees a goodness inside of vyn that hesitates to make itself obvious and known because vyn is scared of getting hurt thanks to it. all of them see the other and their goodness and, unbidden, their hearts want to give love to each other as well.

and because theyre all a bit stupid in their own way theyre like, huh, weird! wonder why this feeling is so familiar! and yet i cant seem to name it...and then they all independently compare these feeling with the feelings they have for mc, a feeling they do know the name of, and theyre like.

WAIT.

THESE FEELINGS ARE...VERY BASICALLY EXACTLY WHAT I FEEL FOR MC.

which only means one thing: theyve fallen in love with everybody else

marius: //goes to his studio to Think and sees that a bunch of his recent art actually had little crumbs of these feelings already, etched into the brushstrokes and scenes. has an emotional crisis about it

vyn: //records a 1 hour long entry in his audio diary to examine and gain control of his feelings but by the end of the hour all he knows is that he wants to hold these people and be held by them

artem: //quite literally just bluescreens, artem.exe has stopped working, sits at his study and slowly, slowly, thunks his head down onto his desk, valiantly trying to ignore the fast pulse of his heart

luke: //manically vents about it to peanut who, by virtue of being a bird, doesnt get it. just keeps talking at peanut to get a grasp of it all and then lies down on the floor, overwhelmed

mc, sitting in her apartment watching some netflix: ...why do i inexplicably feel as if something very, very important has just happened?

phase 4 of the nxx team polycule is basically:

pining: extreme difficulty level

because pining is already hard when ur pining for one person. what more for an additional 3 more people. and those additional 3 more people are pining back.

and all these boys are SOOOO OBVIOUS with their romantic feelings, in their own special way. the way they show their affection to mc starts to bleed into their interactions with the others and everybody can CLEARLY SEE WHAT IS GOING ON, LOL, but also all the boys are too chickenshit to confront it, because if they confront it, what will even happen??? being in love with each other, all of them, thats going to be such a complicated fucking relationship, holy shit. it's 2030, yeah, being a polyamorous group relationship isnt completely unheard of, but sue them, theyre scared.

but mc (who i forgot to mention already knows of the boys' romantic feelings for her, shes just hasnt made a move yet on any of them because SHES IN LOVE WITH ALL OF THEM AS WELL and shes been trying to figure out how the hell to make that work, she cant bear to choose just one of them, she'd be heartbroken over leaving the rest of them behind) sees that the nxx investigation team is now all pining for each other FULLY and she kinda wants to laugh when she realizes whats going on because like, what are the chances? that this would happen? that they all found each other and their feelings fell into just the right place for nobody to be left behind?

theyre all scared, she can tell. and she is as well, she wont lie.

but shes always had a belief that goodness can prevail with the right work.

and love is one of the greatest goods out there.

phase 5 of the nxx team polycule:

It's Time For Communication, Baby!!!!!

the exact scenes of how this happens is a bit vague to me. it could go two ways: mc going to each of the boys independently to talk about feelings, hers about everybodys and his about everybodys as well. OR they have a fucking meeting about it all together and artem literally schedules it in his google calendar, or something.

either way, they like, actually talk about this. starts casual, maybe over a chill date, maybe over dinner at a nice restaurant, maybe over a walk in the park as the sun is starting to set. but where ever it happens, the end result is the same: a heart is laid out bare and it is taken in gentle, grateful hands.

marius: OKAY, NOW THAT THE FEELINGS ARE OUT OF THE WAY, CAN I PLEASE KISS ONE OR ALL OF YOU, PLEASE, IVE BEEN WANTING TO KISS U GUYS FOR FOREVER

vyn, laughing fondly: has anybody ever told you patience is a virtue? we quite literally just talked it all out.

marius: //needy whining noises

artem, embarrassed: ive...never kissed anybody before

luke, embarrassed but trying to play it Cool: ....same here

mc: kissing is great, you two will love it!

marius: awesome, awesome, so is ANYBODY going to give me a go ahead or WHAT????

phase 6 of the nxx team polycule:

i dont want to say it's happily ever after, once they all get together. thats not really realistic.

they all have their quirks and tendencies and habits. and those will inevitable clash against each other. theyll have their arguments, theyll get upset, theyll sulk and be angry, sometimes. but also...

theyll see each other smile and feel like their love shining so brightly. theyll reach out for another's hand and be held in such a way that makes them think that their heart is in a safe place. theyll love each other and theyll put in the work to continue loving each other. because goodness will prevail.

and they all see each other as the most good people in the world.

so whatever happens, theyll get through it together.