#he just needs to be held and cherished <333

[musette22]

I can’t stop imaging hugging sebastian from behind in the kitchen early in the morning and swaying along to quiet music

Oh god, this is the sweetest and loveliest thing imaginable, that would be so, so wonderful 🥺❤️ Just softly swaying and letting him know he's loved and cherished, like he deserves 💕💕

[mvltisstuff]

hi omg thought of this while rewatching s2 ep3 with the earthquake but okay so there’s the little montage of everyone being happy and eddie running to christopher - but what if there’s something similar for buck? instead of him being with abby he’s dating reader and reader has a lowkey job (maybe librarian at an elementary school?) so when he gets home the first thing he does is yell for reader and then holds them and they both shed a few happy tears just talking about how happy they are that the other is okay.

you’re honestly the bestest and i am saying this in advance that this is gonna be fabulous, as always. PLEASE AND THANK YOU!! <333

something in the orange - e.b

summary: request

evan buckley x reader

gif

a/n: the end of this ask was literally so sweet, i appreciate this so so much and i’m so happy you enjoy my works, that’s why i do them <33

buck was so sick and tired of watching everyone else have someone to run to. he hated having to see everyone in each others arms, watching a warm embrace ensue in front of him, just wanting it to be him instead. it was years on end of him watching kids with their parents, husbands with their wives, friends with their own friends. he always had the quick breakfast with a lay in bed, but he never had the long run of love that was supposed to come with it.

he thought his parents would be able to supply that love for him, but he must’ve been mistaken. they had no issue jumping out on every little thing in his life, nonetheless missing out on it. there was only so much love maddie could give, and he needed every drop of it. he thought maybe, someone mature like abby would come with the cherishing attitude to stay, but it left as fast as she did.

the earthquake had given a huge jumble to bucks brain, being able to save a bunch of people, but just wanted to go home at the same time. it felt selfish, and he hated himself for it, but how could he wish for anything else but just to be with y/n at home? he’s seen calamity and chaos the entire day, a constant strain of it into his shift. he’s seen death, broken bones, sobs, blood, anything that one doesn’t want to see. it took incredible pursuing to make bobby let buck take a break, but he could see he needed it.

he held his phone shakily in his hand, squinting over y/n’s name on the screen being darkened by the sunlight. he was nervous to even press the call button, not knowing if she’d be the one to pick it up, or an emergency responder who had her phone.

“hi, baby,” her sweet voice rang through the phone, leading him to sigh out and he couldn’t contain the light smile that formed on his lips. “are you ok?”

“i’m fine, i just wanted to hear your voice, make sure you’re ok.”

“we’re alright over here, there’s still kids here that need to get picked up, but they’re going pretty well with the evacuations.”

“i’m sorry i didn’t get over there, i got sent in the opposite direction.” y/n was working at the school on the other side of the city. buck was, of course, sent to work on the east side. he wanted to be able to save her, even if she wasn’t in trouble. he wanted to touch her so he knew she was breathing and alright, but he’d have to wait.

“don’t apologize, you’re doing amazing, buck,” she reassures him, letting his mind relax for a moment as she speaks to him. “go do your job, i’ll see you tonight, i promise.”

“i just want to see you.”

“i know, but you can in a few hours. do it for me, ok?”

“i love you, so much.”

“i love you, too, buck.”

the moment his fingers connected with the cold metal of the door, he instantly twisted it open to reveal the dim, yellowish lighting in his home. he felt like the introduction to his apartment felt like the ground stopped shaking. he was so excited to be able to rest, lay in his bed with y/n in his arms.

the thick soles of his shoes thumped against the ground as he threw his bags onto the floor. his shoulders instantly slumped and his feet automatically led to the stairs.

“hey,” y/n spoke, drying her hair with a towel to the side as it rested on her shoulder.

“hi.” he replied, slowly blinking his eyes.

“baby, you’re exhausted.” y/n steps forward down a few steps, standing a few inches taller than buck for once. her hands run over his shoulder blades, wandering over his skin and magically lifting the tension and stress from the earthquake.

“i know,” he says. “i just wanted you so bad today. there wasn’t a minute where you weren’t on my mind.”

“i’m here for good, buck. i’m not going anywhere, and i want you to get some rest.” she grabs his hand, pulling him up the steps and leading him to sit on the bed. he strips down to his boxers, leaving him shirtless as he puts on a warm hoodie that y/n handed him. he stops by the bathroom, washing his face as y/n prepares the bed for the two of them.

“i got you ice water, i left it on the nightstand.” y/n smiles softly up at him as he walks back in. “i turned the AC up, since you like it cold and i turned on the mattress heater.”

“you treat me too well, honey.”

“you did amazing work today, you deserve the treatment of a saint. come lay with me, please?”

“don’t have to ask twice.”

he crawls back into the bed as y/n dims the lights and turns their TV on. the white lights brighten their faces as he leans into her chest. his cheek rests right against the middle of her breasts, over her heart.

her arm is wrapped warmly around under his arm, the other hand rubbing his short hair. one of his legs lay between hers, his hands running against her sides. he breathes softly matching the rhythm of her, letting the noises of her gentle words and quiet noises from the TV lull him to sleep, allowing his deserving body to rest against the person he calls home.

[diaryofaprettyprincess]

Yandere!Eddie gets jealous and angry because Steve starts to baby bimbo!reader like he does. He can tell he likes her too. (:

please he'd get so mad!!!

ʚ♡⃛ɞ

CW: possessive!eddie munson, yandere!eddie munson, bimbo!reader, power dynamic, jealousy, jealous!eddie, eddie and reader aren't dating yet, flirty!steve harrington, babying, mentions of stalker!eddie, crying (from reader), cursing (from reader), manipulation, toxic!eddie, slightly toxic!steve, steve harrington hate (from eddie) dw steve is one of my fav characters i love him sm <333, crybaby!reader (hints of), mentions of hickeys, hickey-giving, kissing (reader thinks that the kisses she shares with eddie are platonic.. even if she is in love with him or whatever screwed up version of love they have lol. eddie just takes adavantage of her..dumbness (lol sorry))

ʚ♡⃛ɞ

basically all of hellfire club along with steve are at eddie's trailer celebrating their campaign being over. steve's only there because 1) he knew you would be wherever eddie was (and vice versa) and 2) he was dustin's ride home. so, he decided to stay.

everyone's just drinking either juice or alcohol and listening to some of eddie's metal music on his boombox, talking about the campaign, school, girls, eddie's band, or whatever. everyone's just relaxing.. well, mostly everyone.

eddie sees you sitting on steve 'the hair' harrington's lap.

steve's lap.

you're giggling and blushing at whatever the fuck he's saying and it's needless to say eddie is fuming.

you're his, for crying out loud!

sure, you two weren't official, and maybe you didn't quite know it....yet, but there were lots of things you didn't know. like basic things and the fact that eddie would watch you sleep and take pictures of you showering or.. pleasing yourself and then he would jack off to it later on in his bed, moaning your name while he holds a pair of your panties he stole from your laundry basket a long time ago up to his nose to finish himself off.

how he had a secret compartment in his closet filled with your things.. but it was only because he loved you! only because he knew what was best for you! and he knew that steve fucking harrington was not the one for you. eddie was.

he protected you and cherished you and loved you relentlessly. he bought you gifts because he liked seeing your face light up. he bought you things with all of the money he earned from selling weed instead of the things that he really needed. like food, for example. he would starve himself till the day he died if it meant seeing you happy.

happy because of him.

so when he saw steve harrington, hawkins' 'golden boy', spoon-feeding you ice cream from a plastic bowl and kissing your cheek and neck every fucking second (just like how eddie would feed you lunch everyday!), he was sure that he was going to fucking kill him.

but, he knew that if he did that he would be seperated from you, his one true love, and he could not have that! so, putting out the cigarette he was smoking on the coffee table's ashtray and getting up from his chair, he made his way over to you and steve.

he could hear steve mutter a soft, "good girl," and "you're such a pretty baby," everytime you swallowed the strawberry icecream.

that should be him.

it usually was.

how could you betray him like this?

you looked up from your spot on steve's lap, eyes wide and glimmering softly.

eddie's heart practically melted.

steve looked up, however his reaction was more so filled with distaste.

"eddie!" you squealed, reaching your hands up and making grabby hands to let eddie know you wanted to be picked up. usually, that made his heart swell, but instead he just held onto your hands with his own; his large hand engulfing yours. you pouted softly, slightly confused.

steve rolled his eyes, annoyed that eddie ruined his fun.

"what do you want, man?" steve asked, his hands still resting on your hips, drawing lazy circles with his thumbs.

eddie felt his body heat up with anger.

the fuck do you think, Hairball?

eddie smiled, cheshire cat-like. "oh, i just need to talk to y/n.."

"mm, sure you do," steve rolled his eyes, "but we're busy right now..isn't that right, baby?" he looked at you so sweetly it made your heart swell.

"y-yeah," you giggled.

eddie's smile dropped, his hands squeezing so tight with anger it began to crush yours. you yelped, pulling your hands away from his.

why are you doing this to him?

"owie! eddie that hurt!" you whined, and steve just pouted, cooing and kissing your knuckles softly. you blushed.

eddie felt like he was going to be sick.

"y/n." eddie said sternly, causing you to whip your head around and look at him, your bottom lip jutted out, tears forming in your eyes.

normally, eddie would feel bad for making you upset...but the anger took over.

"I need to talk to you...alone. in private."

you nodded, getting off of steve's lap as if you followed eddie around like a lapdog. which to be fair, you always did.

steve just scoffed, not at you, but at eddie's rudeness. he knew eddie was obsessed with you. when would you stop complying with whatever that metal-head wanted?

when would that.. freak get over you?

the answer: never.

you followed eddie to his room, sniffling softly.

was he mad at you?

once you make it to his room he slams the door, cornering you against his wall.

"what the fuck was that, y/n?" he spat, and you gazed up at him, confused.

"w-what was what, eds?" you asked softly, trembling at the fact that he was using your real name and not a cute little nickname like "princess", "sweetheart", "baby", or "bunny".

"God, do you have to be so fucking dense all the time?!" he lashed out, and that's when you started to cry.

"E-Eddie, i don' like it when you yell.."

Eddie just rolled his eyes, annoyed.

Again, if he had you crying (negatively) in any other situation he would be on his knees kissing your feet and begging for your forgiveness (which he has done before). But in this situation, he was more mad at steve than you and he unfortunately took most of his anger out on you.

"i wouldn't 've had to yell if you weren't out there all over steve fucking harrington! I mean.. what the fuck was that?"

he rubbed his eyes with his fingers, the silver of his rings glittering in the yellow lamp-light in his room, the pretty sparkly- look almost distracting you.

Almost.

"H-he was jus' feedin' me some ice cream!" you reason, fiddling with the bottom hem of your skirt.

"No, he was all over you! H-he was kissing you, and--and babying you!" he got up closer to you. "I'm the only one that can do that, baby, you know that.." You nodded softly, sniffling again.

He held your chin with this thumb, making sure you looked at him.

"I-I didn't wanna make you cry, but... baby, you drive me fucking insane! I mean--the things we do, y/n, they are things that only you and I can do... do you understand, baby? Hm?" he used his thumb then back of his hand to wipe off your fallen salty tears from your face.

"I-I understand, eddie.. didn' know! 'm sorry," you whimpered, and eddie smiled softly again, pulling you into a tight hug.

"It's okay, baby.. just- whenever you wanna be held or fed or whatever, come to me, sweetheart. okay?"

you nodded against his chest, and he kissed the top of your head.

pulling you away from his chest you mewled a soft, "kissie?" with your lips pouted. his heart skipped a beat, and he swore to God that he might die. And if he did die, he would go happy.

"'f course, baby," he sealed his lips over yours, kissing you for a moment or two and then passionately kissing you before pulling away. "you're my good girl, I love you so much." he admitted, and you giggled.

"I love you more, eds."

"impossible." he whispered, wiggling his fingers around on your waist to get you to laugh again.

However, what he said was true. It was impossible for you to love him more than he loved you.

"Now, I do believe we are expected to go back to the party at some point..Shall we?" he held his hand out and you took it, giggling more than ever.

For the rest of the night you sat on eddie's lap, snuggling into his neck and exchanging kisses with him.

He spoon fed you ice cream, and held the water bottle for you to help you drink.

He whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

He sucked on your neck and left hickey's on the supple skin.

Steve left early.

--

btw i didnt re-read it for any mistakes so ignore if there are any! thank you anon! <33

[iwanttofuckereh69]

To properly celebrate @hornyimpulsivity's birthday i decided to inflict emotional damage onto everyone with both an illustration and a fic. Happy birthday bestie <333

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers

Pairing: Draken (Ryuguji Ken) x Hanma Shuji

Rating: T

Word count: 1k

Content warnings: angst, breakup, mentions of smut

Summary: It's been twelve years since Tenjiku. Draken and Hanma met again when they both were at their lowest. One thing led to another and what was supposed to be a one time thing, started to become more scary than any of them was willing to admit. Now Draken is struggling to tell Shuji the truth. He is after all more afraid of losing him than anything else.  

A/N: Hello, this is a short scene pulled out from a bigger thing so probably not everything makes perfect sense without the context. Artwork by me, and the story is a group effort between me and @hornyimpulsivity. Enjoy! PS. dialogues are written with "-" instead of quotes marks because im polish and stubborn

Shuji didn't laugh. He didn't mock the Dragon for being a pussy that’s whining over a few burned photos. He didn't say anything borderline insulting, trying to be funny, like he used to. Instead there was warmth. A bit of kindness the Dragon desperately needed. A compassion he wasn't expecting. And surprisingly wise words he should probably consider actually listening to. The Reaper was right, placing his hand on top of the Dragon's heart, pointing to right where it hurt. Where all those memories still were, just like he said, as vivid as ever, despite the photos that captured them being gone. Those weren’t just frames, still images frozen in time, fading on the crumbled pieces of paper. He could still hear all their voices. Their naive laughter. Their youthful playfulness. The smell of the beach in the midst of July, the smell of gasoline and the roar of engines. The sweet perfume Emma used to wear. And even Shuji was there somewhere amongst all the others, an annoying brat from a long time ago, with ugly ass hair and lame leopard print on his bike. The same Shuji that could punch the living shit out of Draken when nobody else dared to come close to him. The same one that now held him, keeping him from falling apart.

Draken smiled softly, looking up at him, in those beautiful eyes of his, glistening as if they were pure, liquid gold. It wasn't the first time Draken couldn't tell what twisted emotions filled those eyes of his. But it wasn't the first time either, when he felt nonetheless utterly fascinated by them. And it sure as hell wasn't the first time he just couldn't stop looking.

He wanted to tell him so many things. Make so many stupid, cringey confessions. But before he managed to open his mouth, his lips were already occupied. The kiss was sudden... and yet, funny enough, expected. So many times Ryuguji caught Shuji's curious eyes wandering across his smile. So many times he himself shyly gazed at his lips. He was scared of this longing, he was scared of the feeling it brought along.

He didn't protest, however. Quite the contrary. He entangled his fingers into Shuji's hair, pulling him closer, as close as he could possibly get, angry at the stupid clothes that kept their skin from touching.

Draken lost his balance and leaned over the wall, pushing Shuji against it, kissing him as if it was their last kiss.

(It was.)

It was different from all the kisses they shared so far. This time it wasn't about fucking, it wasn't about satisfying that primal, filthy desire. It was much more meaningful. Much more scary. Because they shouldn't be kissing like that. They shouldn’t be feeling like that. They were never meant to… And yet they found each other somehow. 

- That's gonna be a memory I'm going to hold onto most desperately - he whispered into his lips, holding Shuji's face close, not ready to open his eyes, not ready to confess that it was probably their last kiss. - The one i will probably cherish the most - he added.

He wasn’t ready to let go of him, scared that Shuji would disappear. 

- I'm not just a memory yet, my Dragon. - Hanma whispered softly and smiled right into Draken's lips, before allowing them to connect once again. 

One of Shuji's palms quickly ended up on the side of Draken's neck, caressing it with fondness and occasionally sliding his thumb across his jaw and cheek. The other one eventually found its way to the Dragon's hip. Soon, Hanma's curious fingers were wandering up Draken's body, reaching his waist, and to his backside, squeezing his buttcheek in quite a playfull and weirdly affectionate manner. 

Not yet. But soon. 

Draken’s lips trembled when he felt Shuji kissing him again so impatiently it hurt. It hurt somewhere inside his chest, somewhere where his heart was, his heart that was beating so fast it seemed like it was about to tear apart his chest. 

Ryuguji gasped, feeling his touch. Impatient as ever and yet… intimate. Affectionate. Tender. Shuji’s palms knew Dragon’s body so well, as if he had touched him a million times before. And maybe he did. In this life, or another. He just seemed to know all the curves, all the crevices. Like a lover would. 

Is this what they became? The unintended lovers? That was supposed to be a one time thing. A brief encounter, a chase after bodily pleasure, nothing more. But it became more. Yet Draken couldn’t even pinpoint exactly when that happened. It just stopped being brief somewhere along the way. It stopped being simple and just horny. 

They were supposed to be just friends with benefits. Buddies that fuck sometimes. It’s not like Hanma would ever even consider them to be something more than that, right? Right…? 

And yet, here was Kenny, struggling to say whatever he was about to say out loud, as if those few words would break his own heart. As if those would break Shuji’s heart as well. That was probably the most horrific of things. He cared about that pretty boy, obviously he didn’t want to hurt him. The situation just… got out of hand. But he couldn’t let it continue either, it wasn’t fair. 

- Shuji - he whispered softly, trying to stop all those tender, affectionate kisses the Reaper was placing all over Ryuguji’s lips. He moved back and gazed at him as Shuji took a big draw of a half burned cigarette. Damn he was pretty. Inside and out. He deserved the fucking world. But Draken couldn’t give it to him. 

- Hm…? 

- I… I got back together with him - he said, so quietly that only his Reaper could hear it. He wished he didn’t say it at all. There was that tricky, malicious part of his brain that was telling him to not say a word. But it wasn’t fucking fair. 

[mangekyuou]

hi, i read your mom!reader x law fanfics and i really love them… I was wondering if you could write something where it follow that same story and maybe the child has a nightmare and law is just there for them. or just any law interactions with the child would be really cute i think,

thank you

✸     now playing  …     SNAPDRAGON。

✸     pairing! …  mother!f!reader x trafalgar law.

✸     type of love! …  romantic. familial.

✸     cw(s)! …  mentions of nightmares. not proofread. 

✸     wc! …  1.3k.

✸     notes! …  my favorite au is back !! i appreciate all the love it got because it’s one of my favorite things i have ever written. so when i saw this request i was excited to bring it back up again !! i have a lot of thoughts about stepdad!law. read part one and two here !! ( d/n ) means ‘daughter’s name’. thank you so much for requesting !! <333

“I’m not asking you to change who you are.” Her voice was still in his mind, as he fidgeted with the engagement ring on his finger, his engagement ring.

Never in a million years would Law predict he’d be engaged. Now here he stood at the open window of the master bedroom, basking in the moonlight of the warm spring night. In the bed behind him, was his bride-to-be, ( y/n ), fast asleep.

Out of the open bedroom door, across the hall was the room of ( d/n ), his step-daughter who managed to dance her way into his heart. He had seen her as his own daughter.

Waking her up for breakfast in the morning, making sure she brushed her teeth, doing her hair, being a third opinion on her outfits, sending her off, and picking her up from school.

Oh, how he cherished seeing her excited face when she walked out of the school building to see that he was there to pick her up. How she bolted passed her schoolmates, jumping into his arms.

On the way back home, she held his hand, swinging them back and forth as she told him about the school drama of today. Before long, he began to encourage her gossip and became her partner in crime. Most importantly, he had become someone she had trusted, someone she loved.

He understood what it took to be a parent.

The time. The effort.

Settling down now was not a part of the plan he made for himself. He still had unanswered questions he needed to figure out, unfinished business out on the sea. And he had no idea how long it was going to take him to get all the answers he had set his life on finding.

He had worried he’d end up missing ( d/n ) growing up in the search for his answers. To him, it would make him no better than her biological father who walked out on her. Law feared her believing that he would one day walk out on her too.

He had confronted ( y/n ) about his worries, opening up to her. He could still feel her warmth wrapped around him, her chin resting on his shoulder, her gentle humming. “Law, my love, we understand that you have goals that you need to take care of. We would never want to be in the way of that. ( d/n ) believes you are the coolest man alive. She knows that whether you are far or near, you would never abandon her. She loves you, Law.”

He could only hope that she would continue to love him.

Bringing him out of his thoughts was a gasp so light he had only barely heard it. He turned around, seeing ( y/n ) still sound asleep.

A soft whimper reached his ears. Though it was not coming from her, not even the room. He closed the window gently, walking out of the bedroom. As he stepped into the hallway, he could hear another whimper coming from the open door of ( d/n )’s room.

He peeped his head inside.

( d/n ) was shaking in her sleep, beads of sweat on her forehead, streams of tears flooding her cheeks, mumbling something under her breath between her silent sobbing.

The sight shattered his heart. Instinctively he had rushed to her bedside, dropping to his knees. He gently shook her, trying to wake her up, “( d/n )…( d/n )! Little snapdragon, hey it’s just a nightmare. You have to wake up, please snapdragon.”

Her eyes shot open, her nightmare quickly subsiding to the back of her mind. But she could not get those disturbing images out of her head. She had looked to Law, hugging him tightly, silently sobbing into his shoulder.

He returned her embrace, rubbing soothing circles into her back.

She had felt safe.

“Dad…”

“It’s not real. You’re safe, I promise. I’ll never let anything happen to you.”

He remained silent, allowing her to let it all out. He was waiting until she was ready to tell him what happened in her nightmare if she wished to talk about it at all.

She finally pulled away, wiping the rest of her tears and putting her head down.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” He asked.

She sniffled, “I had a nightmare that Mom…that Mom…” Her hands began to tremble, not even wanting to say that word that followed. From her reaction, he put the two together. She continued, “And I couldn’t help her. I could have saved her but I was…weak.”

“( d/n ), you are not weak. You are so strong, one of the strongest people I know,” He began, taking her trembling hands into his own, “You are my hero, as you are also your mother’s hero.”

The young girl withdrew her hands, laying back down with her back facing him, “Heroes are supposed to be cool and collected, like you. All I’m good for is crying like the baby I am.”

Law sat on the edge of the bed, looking down at his clasped hands, seeing the ink that stretched across his fingers and the back of his palms, “Crying is a good thing. It means that you can feel, that you have a heart, and that you have emotions. To have emotions is to be alive, which makes you a hero.”

She did not respond, she didn’t even move an inch.

“Do you know why I call you snapdragon?”

“Because it sounds silly?”

“No. I call you snapdragons because they represent strength. They can bloom through the cracks of stones. They are so strong, they can beat all the odds, just like you,” He smiled, remembering the first time he had called her snapdragon.

She was being held back by Bepo, swinging around a wired hanger claiming that both Shachi and Penguin had cheated. How did a friendly game of dodgeball get this serious? No one knows.

Law had come outside to see what the commotion was about seeing the young girl squirming around in Bepo’s grasp while making the most violent threats he’s ever heard leave a child’s mouth.

What in the hell was she learning on this island? And who was she learning it from?

“Alright, alright, little snapdragon what did they do this time?”

And the name stuck.

( d/n ) scooted further onto the bed, leaving more space for him. She finally turned back over. “I don’t want to be alone…could you stay in here until I go back to sleep?”

“Sure, kid.” Law had gotten comfortable, hands behind his head, staring up at her ceiling that was decorated with glow-in-the-dark stars and comets, even a small moon.

“Tell me a story!”

“What kind of story do you wanna hear?”

“I don’t know, just something I haven’t heard already.”

He pondered for a moment. What was a story that was appropriate to tell a child her age? “How about the story of how I met your mother?”

“Boring! I meant one of your pirate stories! I can keep a secret!” She whispered-yelled as she made a zipping motion over her mouth.

“You aren’t doing a good job of keeping a secret right now, are you?”

( y/n ) arose with the sun, rays of light beaming through the window. As she stretched and yawned, she had turned to her side, the other side of the bed empty.

She had worried Law did not sleep at all. Throwing the comforter off her, she climbed out of bed. She had done as she did every morning, checking in on ( d/n ) from her door.

Though as she peeped her head into the room, she did not expect to find both Law and ( d/n ) sound asleep. She had snuggled into his side, his arm was protectively wrapped around her as she played in the world of dreams.

Just when ( y/n ) believed Law couldn’t surprise her any more than he already had.

Where was a camera when you needed one?

“What am I gonna do with you two?”

[kingsroad]

hi my darling imogen!! so i just found your pinterest and babe,,,, i need you to spill all the beans on larra penrose!!! i say an alicent oc and i need it!!! NOW!! pretty pls <333

YOU SNEAKY! i hadn't even made a banner for larra yet, but here i am with the lore!

larra penrose is the only child of lord elren penrose by his late wife. she has been cherished from her first moment, even though her birth stole her father's love from him. elren raised her at parchments for the most part, but the moment she was introduced to the court, rhaenyra swooped in and snatched her up, given they shared a nameday and the princess was intrigued by the girl she'd never met before. rhaenyra, alicent, and larra became close friends. they were affectionately referred to as the three-headed dragon by those at the red keep, even though larra and alicent were nothing even a little close to one. she developed feelings for alicent early, and she was actually encouraged by her father, who was interested in both men and women himself. "chase down whatever it is that you love, my darling," he often told her, no matter what she'd be chasing. "you deserve your happiness now, even as a girl." things get MESSY before long, though, when both she and rhaenyra end up in bed with criston cole -- though definitely on separate occasions. she held no hostility towards her friend for it, obviously, considering that she acted upon those same feelings. but it does cause trouble with her and alicent. 😭 that said, with time, their quarreling ends, and they become even closer than before, even closer than they'd been with rhaenyra. it's during those years that alicent finds herself a steady companion and an extremely loyal member of the greens in her good friend larra.

[keilemlucent]

take care of me

(r18+)

hawks | takami keigo x reader

ao3

word count: ~4.4k

beta’ed: @hawnks

keigo is perfectly happy to help you forget a stressful day

warnings: daddy kink (no age play), spanking, aftercare, praise kink, self indulgent smut, spit kink <333333, bdsm, masochist reader 

...

self indulgent..... caregiver dom keigo? we knew it was coming. enjoy loves <333

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You ached all over.

The mental exhaustion of the day was far more grating than the physical, but the dull throb of your tired muscles was impossible to ignore, even when you were only half-conscious on the couch. 

You were put out. 

You’d been burrowed under a pile of blankets since you’d stumbled into the penthouse after work, curling up without even bothering to take off your shoes.

Night had fallen, the apartment cold, silent and still. Normally, you might’ve whipped up some dinner or showered, maybe done something productive.

But not that night.

You’d held yourself together through the day. Each angry word and sneer you faced was handled with a smile, despite how you were cracking inside. You even managed to keep an even expression when your scalding morning coffee was splattered over your shirt, almost burning you.

Well, you weren’t sure if it hadn’t. You hadn’t checked, considering you were still wearing the stained garment. Maybe, the skin of your stomach was as inflamed and puckered as it felt.

Maybe that was just your mood.

...

You hardly stirred when the balcony door of the apartment slid open and then shut, Keigo’s ruffling and booted footsteps echoing across over the apartment.

Your eyes stay half-lidded and hazy when Keigo rounds the couch, eyes softening as he notices your cocoon of blankets.

“Hey, dove,” Dropping to his knees neck to the couch, he cups the side of your cheek in a gloved hand, “Feeling a bit tired?”

You nodded, lips still sealed.

There was nothing in you to give, just the slow simmering of exhaustion and sadness that you couldn’t escape.

Keigo’s gaze softened, gold and far-too pretty in the dim light of the living room, “Bad day?”

“Y-yeah.”

Your voice cracked when you spoke, the words going grainy as your chest tightened.

As you sniffled, burying your face into the blankets as unwelcome tears stung at the corners of your eyes.

Very bad day.

He shed his jacket and gloves, tossing them to the side without a care. Keigo coaxed you to rise, only enough for him to slip into the blankets, laying underneath you to pull your head to his chest.

“I’ve gotcha’, dove,” He hummed, pressing kiss after kiss into your hair. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

You didn’t respond, only bit your lip and buried your face into his chest.

Keigo had just arrived home after a long day, and the last thing you wanted was to be a chore to deal with consider how fucking trashed you felt. The idea of being a burden— 

His voice shocked you from your thoughts. 

“Do you want daddy to take care of it?” 

His words and all of their insinuations washed over you.

You knew Keigo had no issues taking that role— fuck, he confided in you many, many times that he loved being able to take care of you in any and all ways. 

Giving it a name, an identity, made him purr with pride. 

You swallowed, the idea curling your head. Catharsis by Keigo’s hand sounded fucking fantastic in the most gut-rotting way.

You nodded.

Keigo smiled against your hair, his own insides twisting. He’d had his own day of annoyance and had been more than ready and willing to come home to you and blow off some steam, but if this was what you needed, he was more than willing to provide and have a fantastic time doing it. 

Keigo hummed, smoothing his hands up your sides. “So what are you feeling?” He knew you wouldn’t be great at giving anything other than ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers, but he could try and coax a bit more out of you. 

Options.

“I could start off slow, just how you like,” His voice curled over your ear with a nip as he slid his thumbs beneath your waistband. “Let you rut on my thigh like the cute little dove you are. If you’re good, maybe you could suck daddy’s cock while I lick your pussy clean.”

You buried your face in his neck, a high whine echoing from the back of your throat.

Keigo felt his cock twitch, wings stirring from their crunched position.

“Or, I could knot your wrist tight, give them those nice, pretty burns, tie you to the bottom of the couch and fuck you into the floor.”

You buried yourself deeper, all of the ideas in your head were alluring, but not quite right.

A kinder option was also a good idea. 

“Or, I could hold you nice and tight like this for a while. Maybe take a bath, use that new massage oil we ordered, rub you down until all of that tension is pulled out by my hands.”

The pads of Keigo’s fingers rolled into the knots in your shoulders, some of the stress dripping away with the preview of his words. 

It took the softness to realize what you really needed:

“I want it to hurt.”

Oh, and fuck, you wanted it to so bad.

You wanted to be fucked up and used so bad you could barely move. Fucked stupid, so all of the nasty thoughts of the day would melt away. 

Keigo practically rumbled beneath you, his wings flexing and puffing up against your back, just inches from your face.

He wanted it— no, needed it, just as bad as you. 

He took a few deep breaths beneath you, his hand wandering to settle with a bruising grip at the fat above your waist.

“Gimme your taps,” Keigo nuzzled against your cheek.

“One tap is that I’m good, two taps is slow down, three taps is stop, four taps is that I’m having trouble talking.”

It was an easy system, one you and Keigo had adapted to suit your needs and the often merciless ways he’d lay you to ruin. 

“Perfect, dove, god,” Keigo sang his words like sweet prayers. Slowly, he sat up, still holding you tight to his chest. “You go wash up quick in the bedroom, I’ll get myself all settled and ready. Wear whatever you’d like and shout if you need me, okay?”

You swallowed, gut turning.

“O-Okay, I love you.

“I love you too, so fucking much.”

...

You took a few minutes in the bathroom to ground yourself. You still felt like shit, but in the way that now craved something different and more carnal to get it to fall away and release.

You trusted Keigo with everything in you. He knew how to pick you apart just the way you needed. 

You wandered back into the living room, padding in quietly in a pair of fluffy socks, an oversized tee that hung just below your ass, and a pair of shorts that showed the barest bits of your cheeks.

Keigo was in the kitchen, the hilt of the knife clicking against the metal of the rings he wore as he chopped up a few of your favorite fruits and placed them into a wooden bowl.

He’d changed as well, looking sharper and much more like the ‘daddy Keigo’ that you knew. His black pants were sharp and perfectly fitted, along with the black mock neck he wore. He accessorized with a few rings on each hand and a chain necklace laying over his collarbones.

Keigo’s eyes flickered up to you as you regarded him, a little grin beginning to grow.

“Seems I overdressed.” His wings flared behind him, unable to hide his excitement the same way his face was. 

“I-I can change—” 

“Absolutely not,” Keigo slid around the kitchen island, tsking quietly. “You’re perfect, just like this.”

You didn’t reply, not until Keigo stopped in front of your and grabbed your jaw, pulling your gaze to him.

“Sweetness,” His affections rolled over your skull in the exact way you needed. “Do you want me to take care of you?”

“P-Please.”

The word was desperate, shaking and shuddering as it slipped from lips.

Keigo’s smile grows wider, his plumage ruffling.

“Sweet girl, try again.”

Your lip wobbled as he stroked down at your pulse point. 

“Please, d-daddy.”

What a role to have.

Keigo loved it, notably.

It had started early, that incessant itch to care for you in any way that he could was semi-insatiable until he started to indulge it to his heart's content. You thrived off it too, needing that personal attention that he was so willing to give. And hell, it wasn’t like you didn’t return it constantly with endless love and sweetness.

He just took care of you. 

The details, all the small things he’d gathered about since you’d gotten together (and before then too) were things he cherished. Little things about you he wasn’t even sure you noticed, he collected them and accommodated them in any way he could. 

There was the more mundane, like your favorite smells and tastes and touches. The knowledge of the best textures of clothes and blankets that he loved to gift you and your favorite spices and sweets were coveted. 

There was the more intimate, too.

He had taken breaking you apart with pleasure as a divine rite, that first time he got you on the silken sheets of his bed. Learning every twitch and shudder and what it meant felt like his life’s goal as he buried his face in your cunt.

You liked it all, notably. 

You thrived off the attention, though it took a while for you to accept that ‘yes, you do indeed deserve this, very much so.’ 

Once more, you returned it. Perhaps you weren’t quite as perceptive as Keigo was, you didn’t have the training (thank god), but you did constantly return love to him. Your own touch and kind words more comforting than anything he’d ever received in his fucking life.

He could only return the favor by taking care of you in any way that you needed.

And that night?

You needed to hurt. 

And Keigo, truthfully, was in the mood to get a bit of tied up anger out in the sweetest way possible. 

...

Keigo drifted to the couch, your hand in his with you in tow. You were so meek that day, eyes downcast.

He’d have to be careful, watch your body and expressions and not push you too far. He trusted you to call things off, but he still never hurt you beyond what you could handle.

Besides, Keigo had crafted a wonderful plan that he was fairly (very) certain you would enjoy.

Keigo sat down on the couch, thighs parted the slightest bit, a half-chub already pressing against his trouser.

“Lie down, dove,” He kept his voice so sweet as he tapped his thigh. “Let me help you.”

You scrunched your shirt in your hands, mind beginning to get pleasantly hazy with his words and you laid yourself over his lap. You adjusted with your arms cushioning your head, knees pressed against the cushion. 

“Talk to me, sweetness— What’s going on?” Keigo spoke as he nudged your hips upwards, your back bowing and arching under his touch.

 “Just a bad day,” You swallowed, burying your face into the cushions. “I don’t want to think about it.”

Your head was already swimming, you didn’t want to mentally relive how awful the day had been— 

“Then let’s make it good, hm?” Keigo mused, cupping your ass through your shorts and squeezing. “Make you forget in your favorite way. I know how much you like this.”

You tried to speak, but your jaw snapped shut with a click and a cry as Keigo’s palm smacked over the fat of your ass.

“You just need a little bit of extra help today, hm?” Keigo smoothed his hand over where he had struck. The motion was tender in the same way his words were, washing over you enough to almost distract from the pain that was just beginning. 

“Uh-huh,” You replied, weak and muffled into the fabric beneath you.

Another strike sent you pressing into the cushions, whining against upholstery as Keigo rubbed over your skin was against, his other hand going to stabilize your back, tracing his name and little hearts over your spine. 

“‘Uh-huh’, who?” 

“Daddy!” You screamed with the next strike. Your words melded with the echo of the sounds of your flesh.

Keigo was beaming at you, you could feel it. His wings were puffed up, rippling in time with heavy breathing.

“Good girl, god, dove, perfect,” He leaned down to press a kiss to the back of your head while smoothing a hand beneath your shorts. “You’re just so good. You deserve so much good, you know that?”

You nodded as Keigo shucked your shorts to the ground, pushing up your shirt to leave most of you bare to him.

It felt vulnerable, despite having been in this position before. 

“I d-do,” You stuttered, words sticky. “I am good.”

It felt real, for a moment, brightened by the sharp pain that was growing constant from your cheeks.

“God, perfect,” Keigo waxed, grabbing a handful of your ass and squeezing. “Here’s what you’re gonna do sweetness— here’s how I’m gonna take care of you today.”

His hand slid between your clenched thighs, pushing them apart and barely teasing your slit, “You’re gonna hurt for me, so fucking good. I’m gonna give you... twenty-five, how does that sound?”

You nodded, an answer Keigo accepted.

“Good,” You could hear his grin. “You’re gonna take each one so well, I know you will, dove.”

The expectation hurt so bad you winced. 

Keigo hushed you with a hand to the back of your neck, “It’s alright, I’ll be right here. Just want to break you a little bit, hm?”

You whined this time, shifting your thighs together as Keigo chuckled. 

“Maybe a lot, but we’ll see. I don’t want you thinking after this.”

Holy fuck, neither did you. You’d be content to be close to braindead when Keigo was through with you. 

Any reply you had was just a warbled moan into the cushion below as Keigo slapped his hand down once more.

“Count, sweetness.”

“O-one.”

Another smack, to the other cheek, flesh growing hot. 

“T-two— “

And Keigo didn’t fucking relent.

Each smack was hard, the fat of your ass jiggling and burning against the flat of his palm. The knick of his rings against the soft flesh only added to burn and sting. 

Perhaps, in other conditions, Keigo would have built up to the level of pain he was providing. Preamble a bit with some softer touches and sweet words as opposed to relentlessly spanking your ass so hard you swore you could already feel welts forming from the rings he wore.

“T-t— Ten!” 

Your voice cracked in your throat, each impact bringing up sprinklings of tears that were rubbed into the couch. 

All the harshness of his strikes was in harmony with the sinfully soft way he was touching you otherwise.

A gentle hand running through your hair, mindful of any knots or tangles. His fingertips stroked up and down your neck, nails teasing the thin skin just below your ear. Even the way he rubbed at your flesh between strikes was so fucking tender, despite how his touch made the hot skin boil even more.

Your first muffled sob was what got him going verbally.

“Oh, wow,” Keigo whistled to himself, a sharp-nailed finger running up your spine. “Are you crying already, sweetness? Does this hurt too bad?”

“N-no,” You forced the words out, even as they clung to the back of your tongue. 

The confusing feelings and emotions thrumming through you made you want to just let go. The tears mixed with the loving fullness in your chest, all counterpointed by hot pain that was ripping through your nerves from the bruises and singed skin from your ongoing spanking. 

Not to mention the slick coating your thighs— 

“Seems not,” Keigo clicked his tongue, pausing to run a finger over your slit. “Still dripping for me, even when I’m touching you like this?”

He spanked you again, right over a pre-existing welt.

You sputtered in the cushions, almost sobbing but still trying to hold onto a semblance of your composure.

Keigo could see it in the rigidity of your shoulders. No matter how he pressed into the muscles in time with the strikes he dealt, you just wouldn’t loosen up.

You shook against the cushions below, exertion from holding your arched back clear.

Keigo hummed to himself.

You said you wanted it to hurt, right?

And God, if he wasn’t going to deliver. 

In a flurry of motion, Keigo shifted, bringing you with him.

Your cheek remained against the leather of the couch, blood rushing to your head as your ass was thrown up and over the armrest. 

Keigo stood up, wings unrestrained and extended. You couldn’t see the angry, red plumage, only the shadow it threw over you.

“Oh, dove,” Keigo waxed. “You just need a bit more, right?”

Another strike.

“F-f— Fifteen— “

“You’ve had such a rough day, haven’t you?” 

His words stir something vile in your soupy brain, a whimper leaking through your parted lips.

(Maybe, you were more fucked out than you thought.)

He hushed you with a yank on your hair, forcing your back and neck to bow.

“My dove just needs to know how loved they are, hm?”

You nodded, his grip tightening but you could hardly care. Each spark of pain felt so fucking good, your lingering barriers broke down more and more with each one of Keigo’s touches.

Whether they were that syrupy comforting kind or burning, bruising kind, you couldn’t care or tell. The blend of it all was flooding through you so well, all you could do was blubber out numbers between bursts of tears and ‘more’s and ‘please’es.

“T-we— n— ty!” The syllables felt choppy, maybe, but you hardly cared.

“Good girl, fuck,” Keigo gritted out, palming the front of his trouser. He’d been graciously (read: cruelly) ignoring your dripping cunt as well as his own ache throughout your spanking session.

He’d make sure the two of you were satisfied by the time it was all over.

You did have five strikes left.

 “Taps for me, love,” Keigo’s rubbed at your back, hips bumping into your broiled ass. 

You gave the leather below a single hard tap.

All good.

“Perfect.”

 And with very little reverie, a few of Keigo’s feathers shot from his wings, wrapping around your wrists and ankles, pinning you to the leather.

And with even less reverie, Keigo’s spread your asscheeks wide and spat onto your cunt.

“K-Keigo!”

His name ripped from your throat, mixing with a shriek as the cold spit went clammy against your burning flesh.

“Try again, sweetness.” 

The next strike was hard, and Keigo’s hold didn’t shift from your cheeks. 

He’d hardened two fucking feathers.

Larger ones, broader enough to strike down at the top of the curve of your ass with a swift flick.

They were so much harder than his hands. 

So.

Much.

Harder.

Harsher.

Crueler. 

“D-daddy!”

You corrected yourself instantly, clawing into the cushions. Your chest burned as your sobs turned to weepings, your cheeks singeing with each harsh breath.

“Tw— e— nty one!

You barely managed to get the words out before Keigo buried his face in your cunt.

And fuck, did he eat you like the prized meal you were. His words be damned, he had plenty of ways to break you down beyond his verbal praise. 

He lapped at the tacky slick on your thighs, licking up to tease at your pussy with the tip of his tongue. The stubble along his chin roughed up your most precious bits, but you didn’t mind.

If anything, you wanted it to hurt more. 

For that reason, his feathers could finish the job. They surely had a harder hit than his hands had.

Based on the way you were quaking against him, stammering and blabbering little pleads and adorations, they were doing their job.

Broken little thing, weren’t you?

But that was the point, of course. 

“Four more, dove,” Keigo murmured against your folds. “Say thank you with each one, dove. Keep being good for me.”

The command was all you needed, hurriedly nodding into the tear-soaked fabric below.

The feathers struck down again, skin breaking.

“T— wen-ty two!” 

Keigo chuckled against your cunt, pulling away only to tease slide his fingers over your clit, “Feeling good?”

“T-Thank you!”

Oh, you were fucking braindead. 

Keigo was all too pleased, a few smaller feathers going to prop up your hips as they trembled.

“Good,” His words were muffled by your sex, but neither of you had the mind to care about words. It was all in the soup of sounds that kept you rutting back into his tongue. “Keep going.”

The next strike was so loud, it eclipsed the sound of your own shriek.

“TW— wenty three! Thank you!”

Keigo could feel you wheeze, but no taps came.

No reason not to continue.

His own pants felt tight as he rolled his hips into the side of the couch, eyes rolling back into his head as your cunt gushed around him.

Your entire body was thrumming, pulsing from the inside out with what had to be pain, but you could hardly tell. You were spinning somewhere harsh and fast and you didn’t dare try to rationalize it.

All you could ground yourself on was the slap of Keigo’s feathers and the feel of him eating you in earnest.

It was enough, barely.

The next slap just added to your feelings. 

 “TWE— EN— ty f-four! T-thank you!”

Keigo pulled away, wiping your arousal from around his lips and scooting around the couch to get a better look at your face.

As absolutely hot as he was, and how desperately he wanted to eat you up until he burst, he also knew he was pushing you fairly hard.

“Sweetness, ready to take your last one?” 

Keigo ran his fingers through your hair as your eyes focused on him in their half-lidded position. 

“I-I can’t do it, daddy.”

He paused.

You’d have given taps if you wanted to stop, truly. He trusted you on that.

“Yes, you can,” Keigo cooed, thumbing a bit of drool over your cheek. “I know you can.”

“I-I can’t,” You sobbed out, burying your face into the couch. Despite your words, you stayed tense and rigid.

All you needed was a little push.

Keigo took to leaving gentle touches across your back, rubbing out your tension wherever he found it knotted. Your weeping didn’t fully subside, but it certainly quieted as you took gulps of breath was some gentle coaching.

“Can you take one more for me? For your daddy?” Keigo glowed with pride as he spoke, seeing the way your eyes lit up and your head bobbed against the cushions.

“Uh-huh,” You leaned into his touch where you could. “One m-more, f-for you.”

You gave a single tap into the cushions.

 Keigo couldn’t help but be proud of you as you readjusted, arch going harsher and deeper.

He’d finished your spanking off with his hand, you earned it after taking so much so well.

The large feathers returned to him, while a single small one drifted between your sticky thighs to part your folds.

Slowly, the plume circled around your clit, lapping at the nub as his tongue would, your juices soaking it all the same. 

Even as Keigo laid the most gentle touch on your ass, the throb and burn of it made your whimper and whine. 

One more.

Just one more strike and all of that mundane stress and anger would be broken off from you and dissolved in a puddle of your own tears.

“When I give you your last one, you’re going to cum all over that feather for me, dove, understand?”

You nodded, hurriedly, barely grinding against the stimulation. 

Keigo wound up, wings extended and full, before putting all of his weight into his swing.

His palm hit your rear with such a crack that it broke both of you.

You screamed, shrieked, as your thighs clenched and gave out beneath you. Any cries you’d be managing to hold back ripped from your throat with the last smack as your cunt clenched and pleasure exploded in your gut. 

Barely, you managed to speak through your tears.

“Twenty-f-five.. .. thank you....” 

Keigo had to take a moment himself, breathing hard and particularly weak-kneed. 

The sweet cry that had torn from your mouth was all he needed to be pushed over the edge, his cock twitching and spurting while hardly even being touched.

He was impressed, with both himself and you.

“God, dove, you did so well for me,” Keigo wiped the salt from his brow, ignoring his creamed pants to slip onto the couch and pull you into his arms.

You were half-lucid, sticky with sweat and arousal but you couldn’t find yourself to care. All you could fixate on was the feel of Keigo’s heat and the ruffle of his feathers as you settled into his lap.

Keigo pressed kisses against your temples and cheeks, positioning your thighs around his own and allowing you to sag into his chest. 

You clung to him with everything you had as you spun down from your high.

He whispered little affections to you, small praises and love for doing so ‘well for him’ and ‘how good you took it, took it all’. 

A few of his feathers came and went carrying a bowl of fruit, chilled and cut up into bite-sized pieces.

From your haze, Keigo pressed a piece of sweetness to your lips.

“Eat, love, take it,” He purred as you opened your mouth just enough for the fruit to slip in. You chewed slowly, focusing on the flavor and texture before swallowing.

The spare drool that slipped from the corner of your mouth was quickly scooped up by Keigo’s thumb, gathered and popped into his own mouth.

His feathers rippled.

“I feel a lot better,” You slurred into the crook of his neck. “Thank you.”

Keigo chuckled, something high and light that made your guts turn anew. His hand brushed over the meat of your ass, bruised and covered in welts, “You’re welcome, but...”

His touch hurt, but in the best way.

A pleasant reminder.

“How does this feel?” 

“Painful, but good,” You hummed, opening your mouth for another piece of fruit. The tartness of the bite brought you closer to lucidity. “You’re too good to me, you know.”

“Flattery, when you’re this fucked out? I’m impressed,” Keigo pulled you closer by the small of your back. “Rest for a little bit, then I’ll clean us up, sound good?”

“Very,” You circled your arms around him, locking your hands just below his wings. “But... ‘us’?”

“I might’ve nutted. Maybe.”

You snorted, but you were quickly quieted by another piece of sweetness and plenty of distracting affection.

Desperately needed, by both you. 

....

thank you for reading!!! check out my links (ko-fi, ao3, and twitter!!)  

[noctumbra]

❝special❞

summary ─ “such a good girl,” he whispered, his hand petting your hair and stroking your cheek softly.

pairing ─ mob!bucky barnes x reader

warnings ─ smut, +18, gun play, daddy kink, oral sex (m receiving), face fucking, face slapping, pet names, dom!bucky, thigh riding

a/n ─ um. ok. i’m not so sure about the smut part, hope i did okay skjfhsjdf i was going to post charles and alpha!bucky fics i know but i wanted to give something while I’m writing them. and this. well, today’s this prompt’s day sooooooo hope you like it! please leave a comment if you do! thank you <333

KINKTOBER DAY TWENTY-NINE: mob!bucky + face fucking/slapping + gun play 

Bucky had been watching you eye his gun on the table for an hour now. He could see your pupils dilating, your breathing getting a little heavier, and his eyes were watching every flick of your tongue whenever you licked your lips.

He had told you that you could stay in the room, ordered you to sit still until he was done with this meeting. After that, you could play if you were a good girl. You had nodded eagerly, the urge to be good for him was too much for you to ignore it, and it made Bucky smile. He loved the eagerness you had, loved how much you wanted to be a good girl for him.

“Well, T’Challa and his sister are insisting on that negotiation you had talked about? What do they want?” Bucky snapped out of his eerie and pulled his eyes off you with Sam’s question. Blinking a couple times, Bucky readjusted himself on his comfortable office chair.

“They want us not to cross the border they have drawn,” he started; his commanding, sultry tone was making you shiver with almost each word. “Shuri wants to be updated with each development about health and technology while T’Challa wants to know everything.” Bucky sighed deeply. “Basically, they want to be our partner in everything.”

Bucky saw Natasha arching one, perfect brow challengingly. “Do we want that?” Bucky threw her a ‘what do you think’ look.

“Yes,” he answered, mimicking her sarcasm filled voice. “They’re valuable people with very precious resources, Natalia. Of course, we want that.” Natasha’s cat-like green eyes narrowed at him dangerously. Bucky wasn’t scared of her, no, he knew what she was capable of, but he also knew that she wouldn’t go against him whatever the situation they were in.

“Fine,” she said, shrugging. “Are we gonna ignore Killmonger or are we gonna accept him just like that?” She snapped her fingers to stress the word.

“We are doing business with Udakus, Natalia. Not with Killmongers,” Bucky sighed. “He can figure things out by himself; he’s no one to us.” Bucky waved a dismissively. His eyes were watching you from time to time, just to check-in. Natasha opened her mouth to intervene, but Bucky lifted the hand he just waved at her direction. “I know that they’re cousins. If T’Challa wants him to be taken care of like them, then he can do that himself. I ain’t doing any business with a fucking thief.”

“Fine,” she repeated, shrugging once more. Bucky nodded distractedly.

“Okay, now go. We’ll talk more about this in the morning. Go,” he waved his hand, not looking at them, he watched you as Sam and Natasha left. Bucky looked at Steve, his bodyguard who was standing by the door, and nodded at him. “You can leave, too. We’ll be up in the penthouse shortly.” Steve nodded obediently.

“Goodnight, sir,” he said and left as well.

Bucky’s eyes found yours as soon as you were alone. Snapping his fingers sharply, Bucky called out to you. “C’mere honey,” he murmured the command and sprawled on his chair. You stood from the seat you were occupying and walked towards him, falling onto your knees gently as soon as you were between his thighs. Bucky hummed happily.

“Such a good girl,” he whispered, his hand petting your hair and stroking your cheek softly. You smiled at him as you leaned into his touch. You loved when he was soft on you like this. You loved it when he showered you with love and cherished you. You felt special. “You’ve been very patient today,” Bucky murmured. His eyes were watching the way your eyelashes fanning your cheeks, watching the already-debauched look you were supporting. “You’ve earned a reward.”

You beamed immediately, and Bucky chuckled softly at your eagerness. “A reward?” You asked, “What is it, Daddy? What is it?” Bucky’s thumb skimmed your cheek, nose and came to a stop on your lips.

“What do you want?” He answered you with another question. “Hm? What would you like to have as a reward?” You bit your lip, eyes already glossy, you looked shy. “Aw, baby, now isn’t the time to be a shy little baby, is it?” You shook your head. “Tha’s my girl. C’mon tell me, hm?”

You licked your lips before answering: “Fuck my face, Daddy? Wanna be full, wan’ you to fill my dirty mouth up.” Bucky groaned deeply like this wasn’t what he expected to hear.

“You wan’ me to use your mouth, baby? You wan’ that as your reward?” You nodded; the eagerness on your face was spurring him, turning him on even more. Groaning lowly again, Bucky slipped his thumb in your mouth. You sucked it, hollowed your cheeks, you sucked his thumb like you’d suck his cock if he were to replace it. “Take me out, baby, get it out.”

Your fingers flew to his belt, undoing it quickly, you lowered his zipper and pulled his cock out of his boxers. He was already hard as a rock. His cock was angry red, even a little purple on the head. His balls were heavy and full. You moaned appreciatively. Wrapping your hand around that hard cock, you stroked him a few times.

Chuckle turning into a groan, Bucky stopped you. “Put it in your mouth, honey,” he murmured, his hand never leaving your face. Nodding, you let his cock head slip between your lips.

You slurped all the precum that had leaked; sucking it and flicking your tongue under the mushroom tip, you swallowed his cock in one gulp. Bucky gasped. Both of his hands moved to take a hold of your face, he threw his head back.

“Fuck, yeah, baby,” he moaned, “Yeah, swallow it all.” You hummed as you started to move your head up and down, swallowing more of his cock with each movement. Bucky groaned and grunted and moaned; he was making all kinds of sounds that always got you wetter than usual.

You pulled off, licking a flat line under his cock, you placed a kiss on the head. “Fuck my face now, Daddy?” You asked him, “Please?” Bucky chuckled breathlessly.

“You’re gonna be the end o’me, little one,” he whispered and wiggled on his seat. He spread his legs even wider, leaned against the chair a bit more, and he pulled you even closer to his groin. “What do you do when you want me to stop?” He asked and received a three tap on his thigh. “What do you do when you need to breathe?” He asked once more and this time he received two rhythmic squeezes on the same thigh. “Good girl,” he smiled and gave you a open mouthed kiss.

You sat on your haunches, opening your mouth wide, you stuck your tongue out for him: Showing the hole he was about to fuck. Bucky moaned at the pretty sight before him. He knew you were that special one the moment he saw, and as the time went by you proved it to him over and over again.

“Lookit you, honey,” Bucky breathed as he placed his palm on your cheek. You grinned at him happily. You were getting sweet on him slowly, your face was showing all the signs Bucky needed to see. “Getting stupid on me already…” He whispered, and you continued to grin at him. The palm on your cheek left its place briefly and came back with as a slap.

You gasped at the beautifully stinging pain on your cheek. Your eyes were wide open, lips parted, you panted. Bucky smirked, a dark look was present on his face and eyes.

“Yeah, you love it when I slap it, don’t you?” He tutted. He placed his other palm on your not-bruised cheek. “Wan’ me to do it again? Hm, honey?” You nodded eyes half-closed. He knew that moment that you were halfway up there in your little cloud. Bucky smiled at your state, stroked your cheek and slapped your once more.

You gasped and moaned and whimpered. You loved that pain/pleasure mix Bucky had always provided you. He was master at finding that rare balance between them and delivering you that perfect amount.

“Oh, you love it, baby,” Bucky whispered. “You love the pain.”

“Yes, Daddy,” you moaned, you were drooling also. Bucky gently wiped the drool and tilted your chin up. Kissing your parted lips for a couple seconds, he pulled back only to feed you to his cock again.

You moaned as you tasted his precum. That bittersweet taste had exploded in your mouth, making you curl your toes in your shoes. You relaxed your throat, widen your jaw and let your Daddy to use it however he wished to use.

Bucky hummed; holding your face in his palms, he thrusted up into your mouth carefully. The smooth slide of his cock into your wet and scorching hot mouth felt amazing. Bucky felt like he could come any second, but he knew that he wouldn’t. You were just that good, that good at making him feel amazing with the smallest pleasure you could give him.

“Oh, shit, like that, baby,” Bucky moaned lowly. His thrusts were shallow, it not still careful. His balls were hitting your chin lightly. “I’m gonna go faster now, okay, honey?” You hummed an approval, making him grunt with the vibrations he felt on his cock. Groaning, his hands slid in your hair and he held on tightly as his thrusts got faster.

The slick sounds your mouth were making, with each hit of his balls on your chin were driving you both crazy. Bucky could feel the way his balls getting tighter, heavier. The pleasure that was ringing through his body had him curl his toes in his shoes, got his thigh muscles jumping with each thrust.

A loud groan had escaped from Bucky’s mouth and he pulled you off, making you pant and watching the spit dripping down from your jaw. Bucky took one of his hands off your hair and grabbed his gun on the table, placing it in your mouth after he checked the safety.

You whimpered loudly. You dug your nails in his thighs, and Bucky waited for the stop sign which never came.

“Suck,” he ordered. “Suck it like it’s my cock.”

Moaning, you did as he told you. You closed your lips around the gun, bobbed your head up and down slowly and sucked it. Your eyes were closed and you looked so lost in sucking the gun, Bucky growled. Pulling you back from your hair, he replaced the gun with his cock. You didn’t waste a second to suck him like you did with the gun. You flicked and circled your tongue around his cock head, relaxed your jaw, your throat so that he could continue to fuck it.

“So good,” Bucky moaned. “So fuckin’ good, baby.” He thrusted in your mouth, started to fuck your throat for real. Balls hitting your chin, Bucky fucked your throat with abandon. His thrusts were fast and sloppy, the spit making the slides easier. You moaned every time he hit the back of your throat, tongue poking his balls and licking them.

“Fuck, ‘m gonna come,” Bucky gasped. You could feel that he was close by the tightness of his balls. Bucky’s thrusts became sloppy, hips stuttering, Bucky pulled you against his groin harshly and came down your throat with a loud groan. You gagged slightly, back bowing forward, you choked on his cock. Even though the soft curls that were adorning the base of his cock tickling your face, you tried to breathe steadily through your nose.

“Fuck,” Bucky breathed as he eased himself out of your mouth. You gasped. The tears which you didn’t feel them rolling down on your cheeks made your face wet, spit was all over your chin and your lap had a pool made from drool. “Fuck, baby, you look so…” He hummed. He grabbed your by your jaw and his arm was wounded around your waist, he hauled you on his lap. Bucky kissed you; it was a filthy, open mouthed one where you smeared almost all the spit on your face to his beard.

You whimpered into the kiss and rolled your hips against his bare cock. Bucky gasped at the oversensitivity. Bucky moved you from on top of his cock to his thigh and pulled back.

“Rub on my thigh, little one,” he ordered, placing the gun right under jaw, “You’re gonna come like this.”

You swallowed hard at the feeling of the cold gun right under jaw; its weight getting you wetter in your leggings. Bucky gripped your waist in his large hand and made you rub your pussy on his suit pants. You mewled as you continued to roll your hips, your movements gaining speed with each roll.

“Yeah, honey,” Bucky hummed. “Just like that. Rub that little pussy on my thigh, just like that.” You mewled again, your hands were on his shoulders, and you squeezed the muscles under your palm. Bucky clicked open the safety, making you sweat but also turning you on even more. You rolled your hips on his thigh faster. Your leggings were stretching nicely and providing extra friction, and you knew you were about to come.

“Daddy…” You moaned. Bucky hushed you, pressing the gun on your skin even more. You choked on your moan, gasped and your hips stuttered in the mid-roll. “’m─ Daddy!” You threw your head back, squeezed the muscles harshly as well as your legs around his thighs, and came.

“There ya go, sweetheart,” Bucky whispered, putting the gun on the table so that he could wrap his arms around you. He hugged you tightly, placed kisses on your temple and cheeks and his hands stroked your back soothingly. “You’re okay, little one,” he was murmuring, “You’re okay, Daddy’s here.”

“Mmm, Daddy,” you mewled. Bucky kissed your temple again and hummed. “Take me to bed, please?”

Chuckling softly, Bucky fixed your hair. “Of course, little one,” he agreed. “Arms around my neck, c’mon little koala.” You giggled at the pet name and did as he said. Bucky stood up, placing you on his desk briefly to fix his pants, he picked you up again after a few seconds.

You were out like a light as he stepped into the elevator, and Bucky wasn’t complaining.

His little one needed sleep little more than he needed. 

[shozaii]

Can I request todoroki x reader where he fails his exam in season 3 and goes to the girl for comfort even tho he’s really angsty, sad and mad

(a/n): oooo! this is definitely another challenging scenario to write! i’m really sorry this took a very long time, but i really hope i did my best!! thank you for your request, anon! <333🤍✨✨

this fic is also inspired from pretty boy by the neighborhood. 

masterlist.

------------------------

worth taking.

pairing: todoroki x fem! reader

another day, another new mission accomplished in your path in becoming a hero. you had to admit, it was definitely a new kind of experience; taking a whole new step as a first year in the glorious academy you were in. your parents would be proud. your friends looked relieved and happy at the same time. the girls in your class decided to have a really good nap of success. 

they even discussed about it right after they received their results. you smiled as you were crushed into a victorious group hug, with some already shedding tears of gratitude and happiness. how could they not? the endless amount of training, the support given to them during their tough times, the blood, sweat and tears all for this very day, determining their flawless win.

you smiled, holding your results in hand. with the same amount of enthusiasm, you decided to land your eyes on your lover. what did he get? surely it was going to be a number so high, it would make your jaw drop. he has grown so much over the past few months - thanks to his green-haired cinnamon roll of a friend. 

but the moment you took a good look at shoto, your sweet smile melted into a frown. a look of concern. all you saw was a dark, ominous aura emitting from him. his face was redder than ever, and one hand was clenching the results, while the other was balled up into a fist, grabbing hold of the side of his warmly pressed clothing.

his lips were now in an uncomfortable squirm. was that really him? what was going on? did he get someone else’s results? you even checked yours to make sure your name was listed on the paper you held. it was. so what about his?

you noticed two of your classmates - also his greatest friends - iida and midoriya, giving him a word or so. noticing that, you relaxed your tensed shoulders a bit more. when he also heard of the 3 month course, you begun to see even more changes. 

“todoroki failed the test?”

“no way! one of the best students in our class! what happened?”

“bakugou too! can someone tell me what’s going on?”

that explained your confusion under one second, but also started to falter your excitement. no; it didn’t drain you - but instead, it hurt you. to think that your boyfriend failed the test which of course, was terribly difficult. then again, had you really expected this? 

todoroki shoto, the same person who has inspired you to do so much more than ever, to go past your limits, resulting in today. it’s never wrong for someone whom you admired to fail, but by the end of the day, their sadness and anguish would be pain at its worst form.

what was making it worse was that he did not seem to try and look back at you. he constantly avoided you. it’s not like you didn’t try to talk to him, either. you were willing to wait for as long as it takes to actually say a word or two. but when you did get the chance, and when you did try to go for it;

“hey, sho-,”

“let’s go home before it gets late,” he said, picking up the pace in his footsteps.

you felt the sky above your head slowly beginning to catch fire. none of this was right.

you didn’t know what to feel either - if it was a sign of defeat, or was it just him not wanting to share his results, or maybe you did something earlier that made him really angry? okay, the last thought is just complete nuisance. neither of you have done anything to make one another angry. even if that happened, it was agreed to be very straightforward and direct with both of your feelings.

which was why, right here and right now, you couldn’t stop thinking of the same thing over and over. your eyes were tired, your mouth ran dry, and your sweat trickled down your forehead.

maybe i should check up on him, this could be my only chance.

seconds after you patted your bed, you heard soft knocks on your room door. weird. maybe one of the girls woke up, and they wanted to talk about how he behaved weird, because who hasn’t noticed anyway?

“shoto?”

“y/n.”

nothing was said no more, as he walked right into your arms. you tumbled a few steps back; you definitely were expecting a long, cozy hug, but not the kind of hug where you would feel him shaking. the burst of emotions you saw in him earlier, it all came down into one long embrace. 

and so you decided to maintain the silence. this wasn’t just the time yet. right now, it was time for you to cherish this, for you to actually take it in. let him take a breather because that’s exactly what he needed as you felt his warm, shaky breaths slither against your skin.

closing the door, you brought him to your bed, now claiming yourself as the bigger spoon. you left soft, smooth pats on his dual colored hair, proceeding to place a kiss on top of it. there it was, a fresh smell of his favorite fuji green tea shampoo.

as soon as you knew it, shoto was already laying on your lap, with his eyes closed. his chest rose up and down better, and his bangs were pushed back with your fingers.

“feeling better, love?” you asked, your other hand intertwining in his. 

“somewhat better. though i really don’t know what to say anymore.”

“that’s okay, take all the time you need.”

a few more minutes of silence passed by, with his body now returning to a calmer stance. he showed no sign of sitting up, but you didn’t mind either. you would never want the pretty boy, with his aura finally taking a full redemption phase, ready to take its toll before anything else were to ever happen. 

and so, he took in deep breaths.

“i know we promised to talk to each other.”

“mhm. here we are, sho.”

“who knew i would make such a huge mistake? i never knew i would be reminded of the past, i didn’t want to fail, either. i wanted to get my license and- just- i hate this, y/n. i just wish i could do so much better.”

“shoto. hey, look at me.

“do you realize how much of a blessing it is, for them to take you on a course, just to correct you for whatever you’ve done?”

“.....you think so?”

“sometimes it all takes time for the sweet, sweet smell of victory. besides, we’re all here to give you support. i’m always here, too. i have to admit, a part of me was worried you didn’t want to talk to me any longer.”

“no...i just, didn’t want you to see me that way.”

“sho... no. never. you’re still the same person, fail or win. why would i ever think of doing that? don’t you ever think that i will think bad of you, or would try and put you down. because you, shoto, are one of the best people i have ever met, and you’ve constantly inspired me to do better. keep doing what you gotta do. keep making your dreams come true.”

shoto’s hetero-chromatic eyes now looked like glass, the turquoise and gray colors glowing with new hope, and new sparks of life. and as they slowly met your (e/c) ones, you couldn’t help but smile, with how brightened up he looked.

“i can do this.”

“you can definitely do this, i have no doubt whatsoever.”

he sat up a little more, pecking your cheek. “and i’ll prove it to you too.”

you felt your face burning hot. “of....of course, love.”

------------------------

(a/n): asnkdjd here it is! i do hope you enjoy the read🥺 i just realized it’s been forever since i posted a todoroki x reader fic hhhhh

[much-ado-about-whumping]

Déomas Forges Ahead

Gonna keep titling these installments like American Girl books. Next time, Déomas Saves the Day!

Okay, but actually: Déomas and Rhys try to move forward. They encounter some roadblocks.

Thanks very much to @newbornwhumperfly and @green-eyed-whumpster for talking me through pieces of this when I was stuck. <333

CWs: past non-con, aftermath of non-con, not-very-detailed non-con flashback, poorly-negotiated consensual kink, non-con survivor struggling with consensual sex, a little bit of internalized victim-blaming

Here’s where to find my Déomas Master Post and my other works.

Tagging: @castielamigos-whump-side-blog, @boxboysandotherwhump , @newbornwhumperfly , @potatopothole , @whatwasmyprevioususername, @moose-teeth , @green-eyed-whumpster (I think that was it? Please let me know if I've forgotten anyone, or if you want to be added to or removed from the tag list!

Normally, Déomas can bear to let Rhys touch him. Normally he likes to lie in bed with his beloved, both of them in various stages of undress, and he likes to let his fingers and his mouth explore Rhys' body, likes to let Rhys' fingers and his mouth explore his own. Normally he feels safe with Rhys atop him, inside him - wanted, held, loved.

He liked sex, is the worst part of it. Before the dungeon, before the prince, he liked sex, and he liked it adventurous - pushy and forceful and playfully mean, sometimes, with his wrists pinned in Rhys' grip or his ass red from Rhys' hand, with Rhys pushing into him with enough force to hurt just a little, just enough to get his adrenaline pumping and his senses heightened and that taste of risk on his tongue.

He misses it, being able to let Rhys chase him around the room and bend him over an armchair, or throw him down on the bed, or shove him up against a wall, rutting into him roughly and making him feel so tightly held, so desperately wanted. It took practice at first, but in time Rhys was able to trust him that though he might struggle in his grip, Déomas liked feeling a little overpowered - that if he needed to stop, really, he would say so, using the words reserved for that purpose. And after - after, Rhys who is always so attentive at the best of times would hold him like he was the most precious thing in the world, would gather him close and make him feel safe and cherished and desperately wanted in a different way, and he would come back to himself in the sweetest place, curled in his beloved's arms.

But they robbed him of that in that dungeon, on that workbench, in the prince's bed. Now the suggestion of manacles sends him spiralling into a panic, makes him feel like he can't breathe. It used to focus him, sometimes, to be blindfolded - now it sends him right back to one of the worst nights, and he cannot bear it, he cannot stand to be unable to see. He used to like a little pressure at his throat - not enough to choke him, just enough for the threat - and now it feels impossible that he'll ever enjoy that again.

And so Rhys is gentle with him in bed, now, and slow, and he is grateful for it, but he misses when things were sharper, fiercer, brighter - he misses the tangy-sweet burst of pain and pleasure hitting him at once. And the farther he gets from his time kneeling at the prince's feet, or bent over the prince's escritoire, or bound and spread in the prince's bed, the more he resents the things his time there ruined for him - the more he feels that perhaps all he really needs is to take them back.

It's a lazy afternoon, on Rhys' first real day off in ages, and Déomas is on his back with his beloved atop him. Rhys has opened him up gently, filled him lovingly, and now he's rocking into Déomas with a firm, steady rhythm that almost, almost scratches the itch. And here in Rhys' room, in Rhys' bed, in Rhys' arms, it doesn't feel like anything can hurt him anymore, not really.

So when the impulse seizes him, it seems harmless to obey. He cants his hips up, wraps his legs around Rhys' waist, and tells Rhys what he needs.

"Harder," he pleads, letting his fingers tangle in Rhys' hair.

Rhys slows, pulling away a little to look at Déomas' face. At the question in his eyes, Déomas gives a needy whine.

"Harder, Rhys - please."

"Déma."

Rhys' voice comes soft with concern, attentive and serious.

"Déma, are you sure?"

Déomas resists the urge to bury his face in Rhys' shoulder. He's never been shy about asking for what he wants in bed before, but Rhys is looking at him like he's fragile, and it makes him feel somehow that he must be wrong. He fights through the abashed impulse, trying to translate his embarrassment to coyness, hoping the flush he feels rising in his cheeks will look inviting.

"I'm sure, Rhys. Please, baby - give me what I need."

And it works, and Rhys does, and for a time Déomas is soaring. Rhys is pounding into him and Déomas feels grounded, wanted, claimed. Rhys is talking to him now, old familiar teasing words, playful coming from him - "You're so beautiful like this, so pretty for me, you can take it, you can take it- "

And he can, and he does, and he's nodding desperately up at Rhys, because yes, yes, yes this is what he needs, and then Rhys growls, "Gods, you're so tight," and the bed drops out from under Déomas.

For a moment, he doesn't have a body. He is a network of nerves all screaming in overdrive, and he is very far away from anything at all, and he is somewhere trapped behind his eyes, and he is dizzy and he is frozen and he is strapped down to that fucking workbench, and the guard between his legs is tearing him open, saying, "With all the cocks you took today, it's amazing you're still so tight." And he is screaming, and he is-

"Déma? Déma, come back to me."

He's lying in Rhys' bed. He is lying in Rhys' bed, and Rhys is kneeling beside him, watching him, worry plain across his face. Déomas releases a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. He tastes salt. His cheeks are wet.

"Déma, I'm sorry."

Rhys' cheeks are wet, too.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, Déma, I would never hurt you, you're safe here, you're safe with me- "

Déomas feels frozen, numb. But he doesn't want Rhys to be hurt - that doesn't seem right - so he moves toward him, tugging Rhys closer so that Déomas can curl into his chest.

There are more tears on his cheeks, now, and his shoulders are starting to shake, and he just wants to make this better, just wants to make Rhys feel good again - it's dangerous to leave a man wanting like that, he's learned his lesson, really - and he reaches for Rhys' cock-

"Déomas, no," Rhys says gently.

"I can- I can do it, please, let me try, I can finish you, please- "

He's crying, he realizes, and it isn't the pretty kind, artful little tears that make the man taking him feel strong - it's big, ugly sobs, artless and inelegant and raw, and that's dangerous, too, because Rhys isn't the type to want to see him break-

"I'm sorry," he sobs, "I can be good for you, please, I can be good, I can be good- "

Rhys isn't touching him at all now. He's doing something else, making some movement with his hips, with his cock, and Déomas can be good, he cants his thighs open invitingly, and Rhys- Rhys is shifting to the side. Rhys is draping a sheet over Déomas' legs, a little privacy, a little space. Rhys is tucking his cock away.

"Please please please please please- "

He's barely conscious of what he's saying - he cannot breathe, he cannot think, he can't, he can't, he can't-

"Déomas, please. Please, love, listen to me. Listen to me."

Rhys' voice comes gentle and firm, and then he lays one hand on Déomas' cheek, gentle and tender and grounding, somehow.

"Déomas. You don't have to do that with me, baby. I'm not them. I don't want to fuck you when you're scared, or when it hurts, okay?"

Déomas shakes his head urgently. He needs more touch, he needs to be taken back, he needs to not be sent away-

"It's nothing, Rhys, it's fine, I'm fine- "

Rhys pauses for a moment, takes a deep breath. His voice is shaky when it comes.

"Déomas, is it okay if I hold you?"

Déomas nods, and then Rhys' arms are around him, Rhys' hands are cradling his head against Rhys' shoulder, Rhys' scent is filling him up, Rhys' voice is shushing gently in his ear.

"You don't owe me anything, Déma," Rhys says softly. "You don't. You don't. I'm not angry. It's okay."

He needs this. He needs this with such urgency it scares him, and he seizes Rhys like he's drowning and Rhys is driftwood, like he's been buried alive and Rhys is a gasp of fresh air.

"Don't leave me," he whimpers before he realizes what he's saying.

"Don't leave me, please don't leave me, please, I need you, I need you, I need you here, please, don't stop touching me I need you Rhys I need- I need you to remind me where I am- "

"No, Déma," Rhys says softly, ugently, "no, beloved, I'm here, I'm not leaving. I won't leave you. I'm right here."

Rhys finds a way to gather him even closer, somehow, makes space to take him nearer to his chest. So Déomas nestles in and lets Rhys stroke his hair, and rub his back, and rock him gently back and forth, whispering soothing nothings all the while.

Déomas can hear his heartbeat now, dun-da-dun-da-dun against his ear. He hears his lover's breathing hitch sometimes, so he knows that he is not alone in this, in grieving how the ease was robbed from them. He feels the arms around him, warm and strong, and he feels the bed beneath him, soft and real. His breath has slowed to match the rhythmic strokes of Rhys' hand between his shoulderblades. He's safe. He's safe. He's safe. He's safe. He's safe.

"Thank you," he says quietly, his voice muffled where his face it tucked against Rhys' chest. For a moment he thinks Rhys might be asleep.

But then his answer comes, his voice rough from crying, but still impossibly gentle.

"It's okay, Déma. We'll get through this together, you and me."

Déomas nods, nuzzling against Rhys' shoulder, and then he lets himself close his eyes.

[abraxos-is-toothless]

This is my piece for the @aftgexchange and is for @kaijuusandkryptids! I really loved all of your prompts and had no idea which on to choose but I settled on Matchy Couples Costumes. I really hope I did it justice:) Pairing were difficult to choose too but I went with Renison, something I have not written but there is some Kevin and Allison friendship for you!!

Enjoy and I really hope you like it<333

Warnings: implied sexual content, I never go into too much detail really.

Edit from in my drafts: Tumblr wouldnt let me post and that’s why it is a bit late, I’m sorry to have kept you waiting.

==============

Halloween was one of Allison’s favourite times of the year, mostly because she got to play dress up. The parties were fun, eating a bunch of candy without a care was a bonus but fuck, getting to dress up in a matching costume with her ridiculously beautiful girlfriend was the best part. This year, Renee had agreed to let Allison surprise her with their outfits so now, she was currently walking around a very extravagant costume store with an incredibly grouchy Kevin Day. The makeup she wanted had already been tossed into Kevin’s arms, along with a few tubes of glitter she thought would look perfect on Neil. “Seriously Allison, why can’t you carry your own shit?” She rolled her eyes, thoroughly done with the asshole’s whining tone.

“Because I need to use my hands to search for things, Day. And also, it means you can’t stop me from choosing your costume this year.” Kevin hadn’t dressed up last year when even Andrew fucking Minyard had. Allison was not allowing any bullshit this year. When he opened his mouth to quite obviously complain, she threw a set of sparkly fishnets in his face. “Shut the fuck up, you’re doing it. You promised.” The two of them had become very good friends over the last two years or so and honestly, he was a lot more fun than she’d first thought. They were sneaky with making bets about the other Foxes; they would help each other with their outfits for the day and would also gang up on sweet baby Neil when he wouldn’t eat properly. The two of them made quite a formidable team.

“Fine, just, nothing too out there. I don’t want to spend hours trying to take off while I’m drunk.” Allison nodded in satisfaction, planning on not listening to what he just said, at all. They were just passing through the ‘Superheroes’ section when her eyes snagged on something, causing her to smirk. It was a Captain America costume, the fabric tight but stretchy, which would show off the body Kevin worked so hard to keep. It also came with fancy boots, a weird belt and most importantly, the shield. She squealed internally, pulling it all off of the rack and handing it to Kevin who grimaced slightly but wisely kept his mouth shut.

“We’ll have to find you some better underwear or you’ll be able to see it under the costume. That or you could just not wear any?”

“I’m not going commando, Ali.” She gave a very bored sigh.

“No fun. Now come, I need to go to the couples section.” Her heels clicked against the floor as she dragged Kevin across the store, grabbing odd accessories and things just in case she needed them in the future. You never know when a girl might need fake glasses.

All of the matching costumes were either very cliché or ones that nearly all couples used every single year. Allison could make their costumes of course, but it was a week and a half away and she just did not have the time for that this year. Maybe next year she and Renee could make them together.

She was just beginning to think that none of the costumes in front of her were any good when her eyes caught on a Sexy Cop outfit and an Inmate outfit right next to it. They were pretty cute and the Cop came with a range of accessories, including the main thing that Allison was drawn to. Handcuffs. The two of them had been experimenting in their sex life lately, trying new things and the thought of one of them being tied up was very appealing. Allison grabbed both costumes and chucked them at Kevin who raised a dark brow at her choice. “I thought you were going for something different than everyone’s usual this year?”

“Don’t question me, Kev.” With a flick of her hand they were moving again, piling everything up at the checkout. The poor cashier’s eyes widened at the array of items before putting them all through. Kevin tried to pay for his own before she glared at him, handing him all of their bags as she put everything on her card.

On the drive home, they stopped to get food for the whole team, Kevin complaining about all of the calories and that they should get something healthier to which he received a smack of the back of his head. When they got back to the tower, everyone was gathered in the neutral zone of Matt, Aaron and Nicky’s room, per request after she had Kevin text that they were bringing food. Andrew and Neil were curled up on a beanbag together, causing Allison to wink at Neil, receiving a glare from the monster in return. Matt and Dan were throwing peanuts into each other’s mouths while Nicky kept some kind of score. Aaron had his nose buried in a textbook as he always did. Last, but definitely not fucking least, her gorgeous Renee was dutifully clearing up any stray peanuts that did not make into mouths. “I have arrived you heathens, except you baby,” she smiled at her girlfriend who blushed in return, “and I bring good food and some little gifts.” Aaron’s head shot up at the mention of food, getting up to form a circle on the floor with the rest of them.

It was all devoured quickly, Nicky stating that he was now to live on the couch, too full to move. Allison ignored the over dramatic idiot as she passed Kevin’s bag to him before rifling through the rest. She pulled out the fishnets she’d picked up and chucked them at Dan. “For you babes. Matt can’t take his eyes off of you when you wear them.”

“Damn straight, she’s fucking stunning in them.” Matt grinned at his girlfriend, putting his arm around her shoulder. Next she grabbed a bag of ghost shaped marshmallows and passed them over to Andrew. He simply nodded quickly before tearing open the bag, staring at Kevin as he should three into his mouth. Neil caught the tube of glitter she threw, looking down at it confused.

“You looked good the last time I put it on you, Josten. Andrew likes it too.” The blonde glared at the tube, the tips of his ears turning pink.

Renee moved over to tuck herself into Allison’s side and tried to look in the bag that held their costumes. She quickly covered Renee’s eyes with her hand. “Ali, can’t I see what you got us?” Leaning down, she pressed her lips to the shell of her girlfriend’s ear and whispered;

“That’s a surprise. You’ll have to wait until Halloween.” Renee shivered, pulling the hand over her eyes away from her face, tilting her face up and Allison couldn’t stop herself from placing a kiss on her perfectly pink lips. She never wanted to stop kissing her, because kissing Renee made her feel as though she was the luckiest girl in the world. She always let out a little, contented sigh when their lips touched and if Allison were standing, her knees would have given out.

Halloween was going to be a very fun night.

oOoOo

There was one hour until the party started and Allison had never been so excited. Renee laughed from her seat on the bed as Allison pulled the bag with their costumes in from the wardrobe. Turning, she held the bag in front of her chest and asked Renee, “Do you want to be the bad guy or the good guy?” Renee’s smile dropped slightly and her eyes took on a sort of faraway look. When she spoke, it was almost inaudible, as if she didn’t want anyone to hear.

“I like to think I’m the good guy, now.” It made Allison’s chest feel tight, her heart breaking at the tinge of sadness in the other woman’s voice. She knew that Renee still struggled with her past, still struggled to accept that she wasn’t that person anymore but Allison was always there to help her, to remind her. She knew exactly who Renee was and she didn’t care about any of the things she had to do before.

“Love?” Renee looked back to her apologetically, realising she’d gone off into her head again. Allison pulled both costumes from the bag, holding them out in front of her. “You want to be a Sexy Cop or a Cute Inmate? If you’re the Inmate I get to put you into cuffs.” She wiggled her brows, relishing in the way her girlfriend’s cheeks turned pink and she ducked her head.

 “I think I would like to be the Inmate, if that’s alright with you?” She mumbled, looking up at Allison from under her lashes. Allison bit her lip and Renee’s eyes darkened. Standing from her spot on the bed, she walked the short distance to Allison slowly, gently taking the costume from her hands. “I’m going to go and get ready with Dan or else we won’t be going to that party at all.” She winked and was out of the room before Allison had the chance to say anything back. Letting out an unsteady breath, she layed the costume out on the bed, stripping herself of everything until she was bare. Walking over to her draws she caught a glimpse of her body in the mirror. There were still a few hickeys littering her body. Some lighter, almost yellows ones on her hips and thighs, and a few much darker, purple looking ones on her neck and shoulder. She loved seeing Renee’s marks on her, loved feeling the tingles when she ran her fingers over them lightly. It reminded her that she was wanted, that she was cherished.

Shaking herself from her thoughts, she continued her way over to the set of draws in her room, pulling out a set of lacy red underwear knowing it was a set Renee favoured. If the night ended the way she wanted, she was going to get to tease her girlfriend endlessly. The costume came with fishnets which were pulled on first, followed by the tiny little shorts and cropped shirt. The belt was a little awkward at first, but Allison managed to get it on, attaching the cuffs, a fake radio and what looked to be a fake taser. Allison put her hair up into a high ponytail that swung from side to side as she walked and she finished the whole thing off with a pair of black, leather thigh high boots. She had only ever worn these once for some stupid outing but they fit perfectly with what she was wearing now. She also remembered the heated look she received from Renee last time, so it was an easy choice to make. Her look would not be as extravagant as it could be and she rummaged around for some of the new makeup she had bought on her shopping trip with Kevin. There were still a few tubes of glitter left, including blue which she decided to put a light layer of across her collar bones. She noticed she'd also managed to pick up a can of spray glitter for her hair in gold. Well, she was already glowing anyway; why not glow a little more?

With a last, quick glance over her form in the mirror, Allison nodded to herself, proud of what she achieved. She looked fucking hot and no one could tell her otherwise. Pulling her phone from its charger to check the time, she was shocked to find that there was still a half hour left until the party, and at least an extra twenty minutes before people really started to show up. Usually, it took her at least an hour to deem herself fit to be seen by people, other than the rest of the Foxes who had undoubtedly seen her in worse conditions. With time to spare, she ventured of to Andrew, Kevin and Neil’s dorm, by passing the sound of Dan and Renee laughing from within Dan’s room. She wanted their reveals to be a surprise, to watch as her girlfriend ran her eyes over Allison’s form and to feel the shivers that wracked over her skin as a result. She knocked lightly on the boys’ door, waiting for the soft ‘come in’ before entering. There would be no making that mistake, ever again. Andrew was on the sofa, a rainbow lollipop in his mouth, staring directly at Neil. The redhead looked close to drooling at the sight. Neil jumped and stood quickly when Allison cleared her throat, causing her to whistle lowly at the sight. He was wearing a tight, long black dress that scrapes the floor a little as he moved. There were two slits down the sides that exposed his runners’ legs and the sleeve straps hung off his shoulders. “Neil, baby, what are you dressed as?”

The boy blushed, looking down at his feet as he mumbled, “Andrew says he wanted me to be a ‘damsel in distress’ because apparently he’s always saving my ass.”

She looked to Andrew with a raised brow. “So you are his ‘knight in shining armour’?” There was a scoff from the tiny blonde man.

“I have no fucking idea what you mean.” He grumbled, despite the fact Allison could clearly see the fake armour he had on, including a fake sword laying next to him on the couch.

“So you just wanted to see how hot he looked in a pretty dress, then?” She smirked. Hazel eyes glared at her before Andrew returned to his lollipop.

Neil coughed as if clearing his throat, blush still staining his cheeks. “You might want to go help Kev, he’s been complaining for a while about his costume.”

Allison rolled her eyes but nodded, moving towards the bedroom. When she walked in, Kevin was trying and failing, miserably, to zip up the stupid suit. “Hey idiot, why didn’t you just ask for help?”

Kevin just huffed before turning his back to her, gesturing that she should do it instead. When he was all zipped, she clipped the belt around his waist before handing him the shield. He looked damn good and if she wasn’t happily in love with the girl of her dreams, Allison would have been all up on that. “Spectacular Kev, you look really good.”

“You look really great too, Ali. Renee is going to love it.” More voices sounded from the other room, indicating more people had joined them. Allison heard Matt first, shouting something before he laughed at something. Nicky’s screeching soon followed, most likely having spotted what Neil was dressed in. If Matt had arrived, that meant Dan and Renee would have come over with him. Allison’s nerves picked up at the realisation, wanting to rush out there and show Renee what she had on and to see how Renee looked in an orange jumpsuit.

“I know how I look Kevin. Not great, I look fucking amazing.” He laughed, shaking his head as he threw an arm over her shoulder. They walked out together like that until Kevin joined Matt when he was offered a beer. The warmth of his arm disappeared but it was soon replaced with a different kind. The kind of warmth that only a lover could give. Allison’s eyes found Renee immediately, her jaw dropping slightly, heat pooling low in her belly. The jumpsuit fit her girlfriend in all of the right places, tight enough to show that beautiful figure but not so tight that it was restricting. As she ran her gaze over her body, Allison zeroed in on Renee’s left wrist, where she had secured the cuffs so that they dangled. As if she had broken free. If so much work hadn’t been put into this night, Allison would have already dragged Renee back to her room and not let her leave until morning. Her thoughts were interrupted as a soft hand took hold of one of her own, fingers interlacing. Tilting her head down just slightly, Allison watched Renee bring a cup to her mouth and sip carefully, and then pull it away, the tip of her tongue poking out to lick her bottom lip. Allison couldn’t stop the quiet little noise she let slip. Her girlfriend chuckled lowly before asking innocently, “Ready to party, A?”

Hell fucking yeah, she was.

oOoOo

It was midnight and almost everyone was either passed out or incredibly drunk. Allison had thought they all would have lasted at least another few hours, but it seems some had started drinking before they had even got to the party. She was currently sitting in one of the two arm chairs, Renee draped across her lap with an arm around her waist, who was laughing at Nicky trying to dance with Kevin. The latter had just tried to lower the former into a back dip; until he dropped him. Nicky only looked upset for a moment before he burst out in laughter. Matt was forming some kind of speech in all of the ways he loved his ‘most precious Danielle’ whilst the girl in question tried to shut him up. Aaron was tucked off in one of the corners making out with his cheerleader, and Allison hoped to god they went back to one of their rooms before the two of them started fucking right in front of everyone. Neil and Andrew had disappeared a few minutes ago with a soft ‘goodnight’. She had the faintest impression that Andrew was thoroughly done with the way Neil kept teasing him in that sinful dress.

She was just about to ask Renee if she’d like another drink when her girlfriend leaned in to trail kisses up her neck. Her breath hitched, catching in her throat when Renee reached that soft spot just below her jaw. The hand Allison had on Renee’s thigh tightened and she bit her lip against a moan when teeth grazed the skin of her ear. “You want to get out of here now, Ali?” All she could do was nod, letting out a breath as they stood and Allison grabbed hold of the cuffs, dragging her girlfriend from the room, ignoring the wolf whistles from the other Foxes.

The journey from the basement back up to their dorm room passed in seconds with how eager they both were to finally be alone. The minute they were safely inside of Allison’s room with the door closed, she had Renee pressed against it, hands pinned above her head as their lips crashed together. Renee tasted sweet, like apples and raspberries from the drink she’d had and her body was pliant and soft underneath Allison’s hands. She gasped when there was a bite to her lip and Renee took that chance to deepen the kiss, realising sounds that had her thighs rubbing together. With a quick tug on the smaller girls’ wrists, Allison dragged them both backwards towards the bed, turning them at the last minute so that Renee was laid out underneath her. Stripping Renee slowly, she ran her lips and tongue over soft, pale skin as it was exposed gradually, inch by inch. Allison loved the sound of Renee moaning. They weren’t forced, fake and ridiculously high pitched. They were quiet, music to her ears and most importantly real, letting her know that Renee enjoyed the things she was doing. When Allison had her girlfriend bare beneath her, she pulled Renee’s left wrist up to the headboard, followed by the other and looped the cuff through it but not trapping her yet.

Breathless and panting she asked, “Where are the keys, baby?”

“In your bra.” Her eyes widened, before they narrowed when Renee smirked.

“When the fuck did you put them in there?”

“When you were too focused on the feel of my hand between your thighs, but nowhere near where you wanted it to be.” And with that, Allison closed the cuffs around her other wrist. She leaned down slowly, stopping when their lips were a hair's breadth away so that when she spoke, Renee could both feel and hear it.

“Someone has been very, very bad.”

“I’m so sorry officer, is there anything I can do?”

“Lie still like a good girl for me, will you?” Allison waited for a nod of confirmation before she pulled away, retreating to stand at the foot of the bed. Strip teases had always been fun to her, she loved the way Renee groaned and let out soft pleas for her to speed everything up, but tonight she wouldn’t.

Every movement was slow and deliberate, leaving her in her lacy red bra and panties before she crawled back over Renee who was now letting out frustrated whimpers. From there on out kisses, touches and everything in between stayed slow, at the exact pace Allison wanted for the night.  Her girlfriend was writhing beneath her as her had disappeared between two porcelain coloured thighs, the strength of them revealed when Renee tried to close them.

Renee fell apart and was pushed over that cliff's edge over and over again by Allison’s clever hands mouth, and even filthy, encouraging words that were whispered in her ear. She watched her girlfriend fall limp against silky sheets, enjoying the rapid rise and fall of her chest. Pulling the key from her bra, she reached up and released Renee, caressing her wrists gently as she fell onto her side next to her. Renee tried to reach for her, tried to pull her closer, eager to return the favour But Allison shook her head.

“But you haven’t-”

“And I’m okay Ren, I wanted this to be about you.”

“Ali...”

“Hush. Time to rest now.” She tucked a few sweaty strands of hair behind Renee’s ear before lazily dragging her fingers up and down the girl’s back. The touch did as it was intended to do and soon enough, Renee’s breathing had evened out, tucking her head into the crook of Allison’s neck with their legs tangled together.

She would never understand how she got this lucky but was so fucking grateful that she was. Renee was the light of her life, the one she loved most and Allison would do everything she possibly could to show her, to prove that she deserved her. Placing one last kiss to the crown of Renee’s head, Allison let herself drift, content and comfortable in protective arms that were always there to hold her when she needed them most.

Happy Halloween, indeed.

---------

Really hope you liked it!! :D

[ajokeformur-ray]

Lmao my dumbass didn’t see matchups as an option ?? a matchup would be cuteee either or!! And I know you SO pick ONE. Please 😂 don’t do both my asks, ONE, UNO, EINS, UN, ODIN. One 😂 you gotta take care of yourself

I found your matchup info. from the other one I did you and I also used things I know about you to write this; hope you don’t mind. And you better hush pffft when do I ever do what I’m told????? So, I’mma do ‘em all. Just let me love you skskskks xp

Hi, I saw you're doing matchup requests so maybe I could try? I am a 5'4' curvy female, really vibrant chocolate eyes, brown hair, little freckles on my nose and cheeks. I am honestly super loud and out there, addicted to Monster Energy so I can be hyper. I am fiercely protective and I can be aggressive defending things I care about. I act tough but deep down I am insecure and deal with bullying a lot :/ ~ @jokershyena​ 

Word count: 1, 765.

Patrick @ you every single day:

This boy. This. fucking. boy. is head over heels for you. He loves you so, so much. You’re the first one to see him, to know him for his real self, and you were the only one who wasn’t afraid of him. “You’re not afraid of me, are you?” // “How can I be afraid of you? No offence, Peppermint, but you’ve never even broken a pinkie promise.” Pat only falls deeper in love with you for that comment.

 You’re 5′4 and I headcanon Pat to be maybe 5′8, which means that he gets to tease you about the height difference. He’s never rude or nasty about it, but your indignant expressions and playfully shocked gasps make him laugh, and that makes it all worth it to you; his laugh is gorgeous. Both of you give as good as you get, and you both adore this aspect of your relationship. Rest assured, if lines are ever crossed (rare, but it may happen in moments of high tensions or stress), things are talked out and neither of you leave the conversation until it’s been sorted out. Pat never raises his voice at you; even if he’s frustrated, he makes a concerted effort to keep his voice at his usual level. He’s not a fan of shouting, anyway. It’s too aggressive and he’s... not about that. Not unless he has to and even then, he hates it. It’s not who he is or even who he wants to be.

He also adores wrapping one arm around your shoulders, fingers curling around your upper arm, and his other arm going around your hips. His arms are solid heat around you, and Pat puts everything he has into every hug. He squeezes you affectionately, making cute little grunts from the effort as he does so, and he really melts into your touch. He’s been through so much, the poor thing, and he just sinks into everything that you give him, even when he’s the one who initiated the hug. You exchange so many of these touches each day that neither of you can ever keep track of it.

Pat loves your eyes. OMG this boy can and will spend hours lying beside you or on top (or even underneath) of you, his own intense chocolate gaze holding your own. He loves to cup your cheeks in his hands and kiss all of your little freckles. When you’re asleep or your head is nestled in his lap, he likes to trace the small constellations on your face, his fingers light and ghosting across your face as he plays dot to dot. He always has the sweetest smile on his full lips while he looks down at you, his eyes alight with love and with the most tender affection. “You’re so beautiful, Lilith.”.

Nothing makes you fall asleep faster or relaxes you quicker than Pat laying with you while you go to sleep, his fingers in your brown hair, lips on your face and his chest rumbling in suppressed laughter as he loves on his hyena. You saved him from his life in Australia; you took him in when you were just strangers and nursed him back to health and in the process did the two of you fall in love with each other. You rescued him and he likes to tell you this often, just so that you know how much he appreciates everything that you’ve ever done for him, how much he loves you. 

Even if Pat stays out late to play pool at the local bar (he doesn’t drink because he knows you don’t like it; and he showers before he comes to bed so that he doesn’t stink to high heaven of cigarette smoke), he makes sure that he’s home in time for you to go to bed; he wants to be there for you so that you know you’re warm and safe and loved, so loved. He may not understand it at first, but after the first few times it happens, he learns quickly how to help you during and after sleep paralysis and/or nightmares. “Hey, hey, Lilith - look at me. Look at me. There you are. It’s okay, love, you’re safe. Starlight’s looking after his moonchild, hm?” He won’t let you go if you don’t want him to - whatever you need, bb <333

You’re loud and chaotic and Pat vibes so well with that. And don’t you dare muffle your laugh or hold it in - he wants to hear you. “Why do you do that, hm? Hide your laugh. Don’t be like everyone else because you’re not, and I love that. So come on - let me hear you.” His chocolate eyes melt as he looks at you, your head thrown back in laughter, your eyes closed when it’s really going... You’re fucking gorgeous and once he’s heard your laugh at it’s most chaotic, he never wants to hear anything else. 

Pat always makes sure that he smokes away from you - he’ll straight up quit for you if you ask him to, he’s not afraid to do so, but if you allow him to continue the habit then he makes sure to step outside or, if it’s raining or snowing, to lean out the window. He always keeps you in his mind with anything that he does. After the death of his grandpa, you are his entire world and everything that he is, everything that he does, is for you. You’re both so, so full of love and your hearts are huge so you cling to each other so tightly. You’re almost always together - unless you’re attending classes or the other is held up somehow. He’s right there when classes end, pulling you back into his arms to bring you back to bed, his lips peppering kisses all over your face. Just at the point that you’re pressing your face up into his lips, wanting more of everything, he laughs and jumps up in a whirlwind of dark colours as he grabs you a Monster out of the fridge, coming back to you as he cracks the tab. “You taste way sweeter than that stuff,” Pat wrinkles his nose but you can tell from the way he leans in to kiss you that he only likes it because you’re drinking it. He’s feline in some ways and this is one of the more obvious ones.

You are extremely protective and this... oh, and this is something which he really does love you for. When you overhear people in the corridor talking about how Pat set a “state warden on fire” or “sold his liver” and other ridiculous things... he ignores it but you see his jaw muscles tick and you see the way he glances down with a slight shake of his head. Even if he pretends otherwise, Pat is daily harmed by his reputation; something he didn’t ask for or even want, and you never stand for it. “Hey! Don’t you dare talk about my starlight like that! Say that about him again - I dare you.” Pat watches, wide eyed, as you stalk up to those people. The first few times he tries to stop you, but you always shake him off. After that, he stands back with his arms folded over his chest, grinning and chuckling. “Hey - “ he calls out to the offenders, “Don’t you know to watch out for Hyena? She, er - she bites. And not just in the fun way.” With a wicked smirk and a salacious wink, you’re both turned on - time to visit the bleachers! ;)

Pat defends you, too, always. He will not stand for any of it, especially knowing that you deal with a lot of bullying. “Hey - “ Heavily frowning will he call out those who are bullying you - “If you’ve got a problem with Lilith, you’ve got a problem with me - so come on!” and he won’t back down. This is one of those times he considers himself lucky to have such a fierce reputation - all he has to do is say something like that and stalk forward, and people scatter like ashes in the wind. He turns to you, then - “Are you okay? Did they hurt you?” and he cups your beautiful face in his hands, his intense gaze checking you over. Pat diffuses any tension by kissing you so soundly that your toes curl in your socks.

When you get insecure about anything, Pat is there with furrowed brows, watery chocolate eyes as he listens to you - the things you don’t like about your body or about your personality or about your BPD and other illnesses - he listens to everything and he pulls you into his broad chest. One arm wraps around your waist and the other smooths up and down your back in fluid motions. Your fingers in his dark curls, your lips feathering kisses all over his face, your legs entangled... you often fall asleep after heart to hearts in which you open up to each other and somehow bond on an even deeper level than before.

“Don’t you ever change yourself, Lilith. Not for anyone or anything - unless it’s for you and because you want to. Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want. You’re so strong, love. You work impossibly hard and you love even harder. You have a heart of gold, moonchild, don’t you see? I love you, so much. Don’t you ever forget it, okay?”

He’ll bring you to tears but that’s okay. He’ll kiss and wipe every tear away and crack jokes to make you laugh. Patrick loves you so much that it genuinely hurts sometimes and he knows that he’s also cherished and adored. 

“Peppermint?” // “Hm?” // “You’re such a pretty boy.” // An amused chuckle. “You think I’m a pretty boy?” // “You’re my prettiest pretty boy.” You always get kissed for such a wonderful compliment - Pat adores being called a pretty boy. It’s one of his many secrets and only you’re trusted with it. It’s just another way for him to say that he loves you.

Both of you act tough but both of you feel and hurt deeply. You’re always there for each other, through better or for worse, and so long as you’re able to come home to each other, why, you both have the entire world. You’re his hyena and he’s your koala and that’s the way it’s always been and will always be.

[jadekitty777]

See You Heal

Hey everyone, long time no update, right? Aha!

Alright time for something a little different but still sweet. This entry is a work entirely inspired by @ladyrobiness‘ beautiful Slow Sunrise series. I woke up one morning and the idea just hit me like a truck and well... I had to write it out.

This is a continuation to that series so, reading it first is absolutely required. But why wouldn’t you? It’s a beautiful Fix-It fic with lots of tender moments of healing for Qrow and Clover both along with them just falling in love like the adorable dorks they are <333

Here are the Ao3 links to both:

Robiness’ Story: Slow Sunrise series

My Story: See You Heal

It’s also below the cut!

Rating: K+

Pairing: Qrow/Clover

Word Count: 2800

Summary: Qrow knows ignoring the problem only makes it worse. Unfortunately, dealing with it has its own set of problems too.

~

Sometimes, Qrow wished his standard for dealing with shit wasn’t ‘‘Ignore it until it goes away’.

It didn’t work. He knew it didn’t work – and yet sometimes his traitorous brain thought: maybe this time it’ll be different. So, when the issue of Clover not liking anyone at his six came up, like a scroll that had been factory reset, he defaulted. Hoped in the most ironic ways that the problem would just fix itself or at the very least, never become a problem.

That was why, as he gusted through the air trying to spot the nearest nomadic settlement, all he could see instead was Clover’s dismayed expression.

Really, he only had himself to blame.

They’d been traveling through Vacuo’s unforgiving desert for hours. It was a six-day journey to reach Shade Academy, most of which they had to do on foot as no locals at the city border ever escorted anyone across the desert without a price. Though they’d gotten an early start, beginning their trek even before the sun had peaked the horizon, as the day waned the sands around them began to shimmer as the heat rose to unbearable heights. Add onto that an unstable ground that left them all unsteady on their feet, relentless winds that whipped sand along exposed skin and eyes, and the occasional Grimm or wildlife lying in wait for an attack, and it just seemed like a recipe for disaster.

So, when the Sidewinder Grimm leapt from the dunes they were walking across and struck out at Weiss, all but two of them either didn’t react fast enough, or stumbled when they tried. The first of the two that had was Clover, who had his fishing line around Weiss in an instant and yanked her his way. The second was Ruby, who sped above the field like a shot, petals and dust following her wake as she managed to get in the first blow.

Within seconds, the rest of them recovered and suddenly the snake had ten skilled opponents bearing down on it. It certainly wasn’t a long battle, but enough to get the adrenalin going. The kids seemed to take it as they saw it, realizing the threat was over once the smoke cleared. But more veteran huntsmen like himself kept on guard a little longer.

Or like Clover – who wasn’t expecting Jaune to come up behind him and give him a congratulatory pat on the back.

The reaction was instantaneous. Clover yelped as he twisted and swung Kingfisher right at the boy’s head.

The clang of metal hitting metal seemed to echo the world into silence.

Jaune, shield shadowing his face, looked tense and a little frightened.

Clover just looked horrified.

And then he was faltering back, dropping his weapon into the sand. “I’m- I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to- are you okay?!”

“I’m, fine.” Jaune answered a little shakily, trying to laugh it off. “I don’t think now is the time for a training exercise though.”

Clover tried to meet him, but his own chuckle rang hollow. “No. No it’s not.” He ran a hand agitatedly through his hair. “I really am sorry. I, I don’t know what came over me.”

“It’s too hot.” Weiss was the one to offer, turning the attention her way. “I’m having trouble too.”

It sounded logical. Believable. Of course the Atlesians weren’t accustomed to blistering heat like this and would be most likely to succumb to its’ effects.

Only Qrow knew the truth of the matter. Tried not to think how a desert wasn’t so unlike a tundra – open space, unsteady footing, extreme weather.

“We need to get out of this sun.” Blake decided.

Ruby nodded in agreement. “Right. Uncle Qrow, can you scout ahead and see if you can spot something?”

That’s how he ended up in the sky, canting in great big circles like a vulture and looking to every horizon as he tried to make out a camp or an outcropping or a cactus. Anything that might provide shade or water. It took a few cycles, increasing his radius at every turn, before finally managing to see several flutterings in the distance. Upon closer inspection, he knew it was the tarps of caravans, moving southwest. Which meant stable ground and civilization.

He dove back towards the group, morphing just shy of his landing. “Looks like someone’s on the move several miles that way. There’s probably a temporary camp nearby.”

Or if there wasn’t, there would be.

“Right, then let’s move.” Ruby ordered, turning to the robot beside her. “Penny maybe you can try and keep us cool in the meantime?”

“I will give it my best shot!”

Their conversation faded to background noise as his focus instead shifted to Clover who, for the first time since they’d begun traveling together, took lead instead of rear. A silent attempt to rebuild goodwill. But his posture was held straight, an unnatural rigidity to his movements.

Qrow joined him, not quite reaching for his hand, but allowing their knuckles to brush together. The effect was miniscule, but there, just the slightest drop of his shoulders as his face eased into a small, not-quite-there smile.

Okay. He could work with this.

~

It was funny how easy it was to trick a Vacuon when they thought they were the ones playing it. All it took was some altruistic speeches from the kids about wanting to help because that’s what huntsmen did and the words “free of charge” and suddenly they were traveling with a whole parade of people who thought they were getting protection for nothing. Which was mostly true – except of course, now they had a place to stay in and quicker way to the academy.

It also kept them busy, trading off shifts throughout the day to keep watch on their surroundings. Which meant it was almost two days later before he finally had a moment alone with Clover. The wayfarers who they were assisting had a strict habit of bearing down at the hottest part of the day to conserve resources and energy. With JNPR 2.0 on duty and RWBY helping with lunch, Qrow took the opportunity to retire to their makeshift quarters.

As he stepped into the tent, he found his segue into the conversation was going to be more on the nose then he’d planned for.

Clover was seated on one of the various sleeping mats, Harbinger in his lap as he tended to her gears. “Hey.” He greeted. “How’d scouting go?”

“Uh. Fine.”

Seeming to sense his unease, the huntsman paused, looking between him and the weapon. “Oh, sorry! I guess I should do this later.”

“No!” The word burst out of him, startling them both. Qrow cleared his throat, repeating more levelly, “No, it’s fine really. I told you to take care of her.”

To prove his statement, he took the few steps forward to sit directly across from him.

Clover eyed him skeptically for several long moments, perhaps trying to puzzle out if he was trying a backwards form of recovery or just talking big. He seemed to decide the former as he bent back over the sword. “Well, I’m glad you’re here. A lot of grit is getting in-between the gears. But I’m worried about messing up the mechanics.” He offered him a smile. “Harbinger’s really intricate. You did an amazing job.”

“Laying it on a little thick there, aren’t ya Ebi?” He scooted forward just a little, pointing to the correct parts as he spoke. “First loosen the spindle here. Then you can take out the suspension spring and remove this gear.”

They spent the next several minutes just going about the task. Even though he was guiding another’s hands through the motions, the work was so familiar it was relaxing. He even found it possible to keep hold of the small, easily lost pinions as they were removed. All the while, he studied Clover as he worked, the way his brow furrowed with deep concentration or how his strong hands never faltered as he took out each gear with care and reverence. As if the weapon was as cherished as his own.

“Last one.” Qrow announced as the fifth pinion was dropped into his palm.

“You know, before I really was praising you.” The smallest cog came out with a small pop, being added to the growing collection on the cloth Clover had laid out. He finished his statement with a mirthful smile, “But now I’ve determined you went too far.”

He snorted. “Sorry my sword-scythe-shotgun hybrid is a little more complicated than your basic fishing rod.”

He gasped in mock offense. “My darling may not have all your weapon’s fancy little tricks, but it gets the job done with just as much grace.”

“Oh, that’s what you call all that flailing around?”

“Watch it Branwen.”

“What? Am I-” The rest of his words ‘on thin ice’ died in his throat. “Uh-”

This time, Clover misinterpreted his floundering. “What, am I doing it wrong?”

He focused on where the other’s hands were, his own quickly reaching out to catch his, only to abort the motion just as quickly when his fingertips skimmed Harbinger’s surface. That Clover noticed.

He ran the same hand over the back of his neck. “Uh, don’t remove that unless you want her coming apart completely.”

“Alright.” Clover lifted his hand from the center plate obediently. “Are you doing okay or should we stop?”

Dropping the pinions onto the cloth beside the other parts, he tried not to let it feel like too much of a failure. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“Why would I be uncomfortable?” He replied with a frown.

Qrow stared. Was he being serious right now? “You’re kidding. If anything you should be more repelled to be holding her than me.”

“But I’m not. I never have been.”

The frustration broke over like a wave so that his next words flooded out like a tide of turbulent emotions, “Why not? You’re the one who got hurt! Why is it so easy for you?!”

No, no. Shut up.

He slouched over, scrabbling hands through his hair, tugging at the ends as if it would ground him back to the present.

This was going all wrong. He wasn’t supposed to be getting angry.

“I-I mean-” He started to say.

Clover cut him off. “Have you ever considered things were different from my perspective?”

He blinked. Looked up. “What?”

The other huntsman’s gaze drifted, falling down to the blade still in his lap. He ran his palm along the surface. “I never saw it. Or if I did, my mind’s blocked it out. I… remember pain. How hard it was to breathe. But as far as anything I saw in that moment? All I can think of is gray. A dark gray, almost black, but kind of green too?”

Qrow frowned, trying to piece that together. Atlas wasn’t exactly known for its abundance of greenery. The only green thing he could think of was Clover’s own pin. Maybe it was just his body going into shock, making him see things that weren’t actually there.

“Either way,” He continued, idly tracing the intricate patterns embedded in the sword’s metal. “What I’m getting at is, the only reason I know this was the weapon that struck me is because I was told it was. To me, it’s kind of removed from the whole event.” His movements stopped, that same dismayed look from several days ago clouding his features. “Instead, I have other problems.”

Seemed like they were going to have that conversation after all. “Like what happened with Jaune.”

“Yeah. I hadn’t meant to attack him. I just thought…” Clover slumped, trailing off.

“That he was someone else. I know.” Qrow said in the space left behind. “Known for awhile, actually. I knew it was an issue, but I hadn’t said anything. Tch. I should of. Maybe then-”

A flick to his forehead had him jerking back.

“Stop.” Clover’s fingers soothed over the spot, sliding down along the contours of his face to cup his jaw. “You’re not responsible for my problems Qrow. It’s my job to acknowledge them and ask for help if I need it.”

There was a lot of things he thought to say, the most prominent being how Clover never seemed to have an issue laser focusing on Qrow’s problems and addressing them (though, to be fair, those results didn’t always pan out) – but what he finally decided on saying was, “Do you need help?”

Teal eyes went wide and he drew back. The look on his face, vulnerable and lost, was heartbreaking. “I, uh. I don’t know.”

“Would you like to try something?” He pressed on gently.

“Like what?”

“An exercise.” He waved towards Harbinger. “Set her aside and take off your shirt – Don’t smile like that, I’m not gonna do anything lecherous.”

Clover laughed. “Ah, there goes all my hopes and dreams.” Still, he did as commanded, laying the blade to his left before peeling off the green shirt he wore.

Qrow managed not to stare at the metal plating built into the center of his chest, stitching his body together like a broken doll. Instead he reached forward, undoing the red bandanna around the man’s arm – one of the only things he’d kept of his old uniform, besides the boots – and tied the cloth around his eyes instead.

“Uh, Qrow?” Now blind, Clover sounded a lot more uncertain.

He ran a hand through short brown locks. “When I used to teach, I would do this with the students.”

“Lot to unpack with that statement.” He was barely containing a laugh.

It was his turn to flick him. “Shut it and listen.” He got to his feet, speaking as he rounded the other. “It was usually for typical stuff. Figuring out what movements they knew by reflex and what they needed to work on. Keeping an ear on their surroundings when their eyes can’t. But sometimes,” He stopped directly behind him. “It was to help break bad habits.”

Clover was already tense. “Really?”

“Ruby’s footwork used to be terrible. Got worse when she discovered her semblance – she was tumbling all over the place. Taking away her sight made her focus harder on every step she made. Made her more aware of everything she was doing.” Qrow reached out, fingertips brushing along the base of Clover’s neck, the skin shuddering under his touch. “That’s what I want you to do. Focus on the way your body reacts and correct it.”

“This… seems a little unconventional.”

He knelt down behind him. “Sometimes it’s the unconventional methods that work. Now,” He laid his palm flat along metalwork layered over his spine, hearing the sharp inhale. “Let’s get started.”

~

Qrow couldn’t say for how long, exactly, the exercise went on for – but it was certainly not as long as he would have kept one of his students at it. Where he’d push them to continue even just a minute longer, he was more willing to pull back with the brunette, knowing this was taking a mental toll along with the physical one. So, when he noticed Clover’s efforts were turning to frustration, he was quick to call for a break, offering that maybe they could finish up with Harbinger in the interim.

Clover, stubborn man he was, didn’t want to quit entirely though.

That was how they ended up sitting back to back as Qrow polished off the gears and pins and Clover set them into place.

Healing takes many forms, Qrow mused as he handed over the third cog and reached for the next, the anxiety he normally felt completely, blissfully absent.

Felt the stretch of muscles against his own as Clover worked, his erratic breathing and shakes having steadied a while ago.

One day, he hoped they could come out of this without their demons controlling them.

Yet, he knew recovery was a difficult, haphazard mess of a journey; so that day was in a future he still couldn’t quite discern, no matter how hard he looked.

Not that he could say he was surprised. His life had never been simple and that track record wasn’t going to let up a four decades’ long streak so easily – but, for once, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

For the one brightness he could see in all this was right behind him.

Qrow slid down, just enough to rest his ear against the metal along Clover’s back, the reassuring thump-thump-thump of his heart a gift he’d never waste.

For it beat with the promise that he was here.

He was alive.

And, Qrow recklessly dared to believe, he was his.

Another gift he’d never waste.

A devotion he’d never dishonor.

A love he’d forever hold onto.

[rayroute-clear-saeran-text-sound]

BRO I WANT A MYSTIC MESSENGER SHIP!!!! You already know my name! I always tell everyone that I am a mixture of a dolphin and lin Manuel miranda: talented but I don't shut up. Big musical energy with every genre of music imaginable. I love food and going to cool places and Disneyland! Movies are also a big yes for me (specifically marvel, star wars, disney, pixar!) I love art and am planning on getting a major in graphic design! I've been told that I am very positive and can get along with anyone

Aye, that’s my best friend!! I included details that you didn’t put down, because I love you <333 

I pair you with Zen!

He was enraptured by your positivity, and knew immediately that he was going to be in love with you. He was super impressed with your ability to get along with Jumin, even if you didn’t like him, yet at the same time, super pissed and jealous. 

 Adding on to that, he was equally happy and irritated that you got along so well with the rest of the RFA. He knows deep down that you only have eyes for him, but he’s still very insecure about it. He’s a majorly jealous guy. 

 He is absolutely glad that you share his hatred for cats. Although it may be for a different reason than his allergy, he is so thrilled that you will decline cat-related guests and try to change the subject whenever talk drifts to anything in the realm of felines.

 He is fascinated by your art, and tries to get you to teach him at first, but decides that it’s a hopeless cause. He absolutely begs you for a painting for his birthday (of course it would be of himself, because what a narcissist), and probably cries when you give it to him. Once he receives it, he will absolutely not stop hugging and cuddling you for the rest of the day. Most likely, he hangs it front in center where he can stare at it and show it to anyone who visits.

 He will get you lots of graphic design jobs by putting your name and work out within his musical community, and eventually you get many job offers to design promotional posters for musicals. Some of them Zen star in, some have nothing to do with him. He knows you are capable of finding work without his help, but he wants you to have as many opportunities as possible, because he knows what it’s like to be starting out and struggling to force your way into the field.

 This mans doesn’t hate animals, but isn’t totally in love with them, either. He had never really been around horses before, and never thought he would be nervous around them at all. But, when you took him out to the barn, he was unexpectedly intimidated by them. Eventually, he grew used to them, and would probably even ask for you to teach him to ride (nothing complicated, just simple walk, trot, canter) after learning that it’s actually good excercise. He gets really annoyed whenever they snot and sneeze on him though.

 He could be convinced to get a dog, and whenever you were off staying the night visiting family or friends, he would cuddle with it as much as possible because it reminded him of you. Plus, he would take it out on runs with him whenever he couldn’t sway you to go.

 He knows that you hate running and hiking, which are two of his favorite hobbies. He’ll try his best to get you to go on walks, maybe even a run or hike if you’re really feeling generous. He rarely succeeds, but when he does, he’s usually met with complaints throughout the activity. 

 He absolutely cherishes the chill nights he spends with you watching movies on weekends. Although you both love your friends in the RFA, you haven’t exactly been innocent of cancelling plans with the group on Friday nights to stay home for cuddles and film. He always teases you for your youthful taste in movies, but deep down those are some of his favorites, too. 

 If you two ever showered together, it would be 100% just singing show tunes together. Broadway is his passion, and he was even more smitten with you when he discovered that it was yours too. His favorite to perform with you is Something Rotten, because not only do you get super into it, but he loves the aesthetic and vibes of that musical. Whenever you two sing God I Hate Shakespeare, he is totally thinking about Jumin the entire time and you think it’s hilarious.

 He knows he could never be as good as Alex Brightman in your eyes, but desperately wants to be at least your second favorite musical actor. At first he was jealous, but eventually just gave up and accepted it as reality. You made him promise that if he ever did a show with Alex Brightman, he would get him to meet you.

 He secretly has a fund that he puts a little bit of money into every month in order to save up to take you to Disneyland. He knows you’re obsessed with the place, and since he’s never been, he knows that you’d be the best tour guide. He loves all the rides, especially the ones that go fast, bonus points if they remind him of riding his motorcycle.

 You had to give him a full on lecture of the importance and greatness of food. The minute you discovered that the only thing he had in his fridge was beer and the occasional convinience store salad, you knew there needed to be a change. He constantly reprimanded you about some of your food choices not being healthy for the skin, but after weeks of ignoring those comments, he decided that they weren’t doing any good. He tried to cook for you, but was really bad at it.

 He could never be convinced to go to any of your favorite fast food places, such as Taco Bell, so you would have to go with Yoosung or Seven if you wanted to go with company. Seven was always down to go, but you would tire a little of Zen bombarding you with questions about if Seven did anything weird afterwards. However, Zen loved going to Whole Foods with you. The two of you could spend hours in there.

 You would always introduce him to new music, and he thoroughly enjoyed it. He often wanted you to make him playlists, and you were always happy to oblige. One of his guilty pleasures was Fifth Harmony, and once you caught that you would not let it go. Whenever you didn’t have guests, the two of you would perform your hearts out to those songs. Zen insisted that you could have a career on stage if you wanted it, but you declined immediately every time.

 If the two of you knew you would be having a late night, or if you guys just couldn’t sleep, you would pull up bootleg musicals on the tv and watch them together all night. You two would sometimes watch the bootlegs of his own musicals, which would spark old memories from him, and he would begin to tell stories of crazy interactions with the cast and crew of those shows. You would have to beg him to play his oldest content, such as his debut in Thai’s Tea Leaf and Cube World. He would cringe at his old performances from his teenage years, and although you would poke fun at him for a little bit, by the end you were showering him in love and affection. Your favorite thing was to play Seven’s video that got Zen famous in the first place.

 The two of you always praise each other all the time. It eventually will escalate to a full blown war of love and affection, and at some points it would get so extreme that the rest of the RFA would have to step in. You two were each other’s biggest fans, and would make sure the other knew it. Zen treats you like a goddess at all times, absolutely no exceptions. 

 He would make an attempt at quitting smoking if you asked him to, and would try so hard. He loves you more than anything, and understood that it was for his own health. 

 He wants to show you off always. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to him, and he wants everyone to know not only that you are his, but that he is yours. Lots of PDA, this boy can’t help it. Nothing too intense, but lots of handholding and cheek/forehead kisses because he can’t contain himself.

“This couch isn’t big enough for the two of you! Why are you even here?” Zen raised his voice, desperately trying to drag Seven and Yoosung off of your couch. You only watched from the safety of the wall, stifling laughter.

“Because we know you two have been cancelling plans to watch movies! So, we figured we’d have to invite ourselves over for movie night if we ever wanted to see you again.” The redhead rolled his eyes, making himself comfortable. It was clear that he had no intentions of leaving anytime soon.

“I could report you for breaking and entering, you know.” Zen grumbled, while you sighed and put the movie in, knowing that you would be joined by two extra guests that night.

“But you won’t.” Seven stretched out even more, pulling Zen down next to him. “Move, it’s starting.” Infinity War began blaring through the speakers as you made your way back to the couch, not even caring who was with you as long as Zen was there and you got to watch Marvel and see Chris Pratt on screen. 

“Oh sorry, Elise. There’s not room here. Yoosung, Seven, one of you two idiots, move to the floor-”

“It’s fine!” You smiled as you interrupted him, but it was a troublesome smile. The kind of smile that Zen had come to learn would result in mischief. 

“Are you sure? Because there isn’t any room to sit down right now.” He looked at you, red eyes filled with caution while Yoosung was immersed in the beginning of the movie. Only Seven seemed to be aware of the situation, and was smirking while trying to hide a chuckle.

“Sure there is!” You were able to make yourself a seat without kicking anyone off the couch by planting yourself right in Zen’s lap, leaning back against him knowingly. Although you couldn’t see it, you knew his face was bright red. If it were just the two of you, he wouldn’t have cared in the slightest and would have even encouraged it, but the two dorks of the RFA were sitting beside you two.

“Elise, come on-” You held a finger up and shushed him.

“Zen, I swear if you interrupt Chris Pratt with a lecture on your ‘beast’ or whatever, you’re sleeping alone tonight.” That shut him up immediately, and he suffered through the entire two and a half hour long movie, despite his legs going numb halfway through.

[doyouevenshipbr0]

gruvia drabble

author’s note: i get inspired by the most insignificant little things and i have no idea where im gonna go w this fic but...... juvia is so BEAUTIFUL omfg n i literally just wanna write a fic ab gray appreciating that. that’s it lmao. enjoy my loves!!!<333

**another note: haha oh ok it turned into something kinda rly different! its fine ig! psa im ab to kinda rant so u can skip this if u want!! if u wanna read this part it might be better to do it after u read the fic???? these arent spoilers its just kinda behind the scenes of ig.. ok so i try to think of gruvia in the most realistic sense possible. i incorporated gray having crushes bc simply, i think its true. i think gray had a crush on erza and lucy. i also think gray didnt fall in love w juvia at first sight lmao. i think it took a lot of time for gray to understand what juvia meant to him. also i find it INFURIATING that gray has never commented on juvias looks lmaooo (to my knowledge). like he said lucy and erza were pretty (at least in the anime) and literally all i want is for gray to acknowledge how fuckin BEAUTIFUL juvia is ongogmgogm. ok ok yes he commented "you're mine" and said "ur body is something i care about" and a whole lot of other romantic things but he has never made a comment solely on juvias looks and ik looks dont matter and im sure its hard for gray to even think ab juvias looks considering all the personality she has but literally all i want is a "ur cute". like thats all i need lmao. my girl needs recognition for being the most beautiful person EVER!! so yeah this fic is me trying to process how gray sees juvia, and even tho he doesnt say it, i can at least tell myself this is his thought process lmaooo. ((he also prolly doesn't say shes cute cus it would be way too embarrassing for him considering he has like actual real feelings for her)) ok ignore me literally typing word vomit lol pls enjoy ilysm. (((this rant is longer than the fucking fic. i cri.))))

*

Gray always had crushes.

It was normal, but Gray never really reflected on it until now.

First, there was Erza. They were just kids. When she first joined the guild, Gray thought she was weird, but he soon found out she was much more than that. She challenged him. Not only physically, but mentally and emotionally too. He wanted to figure her out. She had a complexity that he never experienced before, and he was intrigued by it. Soon, the curiosity of the pretty girl with the scarlet hair molded into an admiration. He admired her beauty, her ability, and her heart, and the attraction just fizzled away over time.

Then, there was Lucy. This one was far simpler, and didn't hurt Gray's brain as much to try to comprehend. She was cute. She was quirky. She was a fresh face he saw around the guild. He couldn't deny the instant attraction he felt towards her, and he didn't necessarily try to fight it either. The bond was harmless, and Gray never expected anything to come from it, nor did he try to advance it in any way. She was just Lucy. A friend, a guildmate, and a teammate. While a part of him was inclined to make some sort of move, an even larger part of him didn't feel right about it. That small part that inquired for something more seemed to die out as well, and while he wasn't sure why at first, he was finally starting to realize what it was.

Finally, there's Juvia, who he would hardly ever consider a crush. Honestly, at first, nothing really struck him. She was pretty he supposed, but had an odd look. She had a dull personality. She was nothing special. Just another enemy to take out. That was all until their first fight came to an end. A piece of her did stand out to Gray, and it stuck to him. He wasn't sure why, but it did.

Then, time went on. Juvia's personality completely flourished, and it was like she became a whole new person. While Gray at first saw her mostly as an annoyance, it transformed into something completely foreign to him. He never knew how to place this feeling, and even now he still has trouble comprehending Juvia from time to time. While he wasn't sure how to feel about her, he did always know that she was something special. She was there for him like no one else was. She supported, helped, and loved him more than anyone. He was completely overcome by all of her. He was so overwhelmed by her love, it took him a long time to realize just how much he needed and cherished it. He needed that warmth in his cold, seemingly tragic life. While the people in his past died for him, she lived for him. He only recently realized that in some ways, that was much harder, and it was certainly much more meaningful.

She did have her faults though, as all people do. She was completely neurotic, clingy, emotional, short-tempered, dramatic, and just--well-- a weirdo, but...

he loved her.

He loved her strength, her devotion, her kindness, her optimism towards life, her enthusiasm, her humor (even when she didn't mean to be funny), and well- he just loved everything about her. Even the bits mentioned earlier that seemed not so great. He loved it all.

He had a hard time even calling Juvia a crush, truthfully. The way he felt towards her was far stronger than anything he'd felt for anyone else. Erza and Lucy held a place in his heart at one point, but now, Juvia was the whole thing. She owned every last part of it. It was a feat neither of the former girls possessed, and he didn't think anyone other than Juvia ever could.

And as he sat at a table across from the three women he ever had romantic feelings for in his life: Erza, Lucy, and Juvia, and pondered on these thoughts, he decided not only did Juvia have an amazing soul, she was damn beautiful too.

The strange thing was, Juvia was always pretty. But unlike his former crushes, he never really seemed to take the time to admire Juvia's looks. It was her personality that always stuck out to Gray.

But when he did take the time to sit and just look at her... wow. Erza and Lucy couldn't even hold a candle to her.

It was remarkable, honestly. She was nothing like any girl he had ever seen before. She was totally unique. Her hair was the perfect shade of blue that accompanied her perfect waves, making her mane resemble that of a beautiful ocean that he would absolutely love to get lost in. Her bangs fell perfectly over her hooded eyes that were coated in long lashes, and in them held a deep blue escape that were her eyes. Oh god, her eyes. They could tell you a whole story those damned things. Gray never had to ask her what she was feeling, because her eyes always said it all. Natsu was sitting beside him at the time, and said something that caused Juvia to laugh. Her plump, naturally pouted lips turned into a big beautiful grin in an instant. Gray wasn't sure what Natsu said, but it must've been pretty funny, because she then covered her mouth as she began to laugh even louder, and Gray was wishing she didn't hide behind her petite hands. After the laugh fest was over, she regained her composure and tucked an unruly blue lock behind her ear, and closed her mouth as her lips parted into a content grin, and just that small gesture shamefully drove Gray crazy. She was a masterpiece.

He decided he didn't stop to think about how breathtaking she was so much, because then it would turn into this. It became Gray relishing in every little detail Juvia possessed, and every mannerism she did. He never felt the need to look at a girl like that before, with such interest in detail. The feeling that took over when he really looked at Juvia was far too strong for him to comprehend too often. It was a feeling completely unfamiliar to him until he saw her. While his emotions about her were a lot for him to handle sometimes, he was thankful for it.

He was grateful for every last part of her.

"Gray-sama, are you alright?" She tilted her head ever so slightly, causing the tides of her hair to fall in a new, but beautiful way, and her eyes were filling with harmless concern. She must've finally caught him staring.

"U-uh yeah." He stammered. "I'm good."

"You're sure?" Her eyes began to flood with more worry, and she reached her hand across the table, holding onto his. Her soft, milky skin clashed with his rough feel, but they somehow fit perfectly together. He flinched at first, but instead of throwing a fit for his hatred of PDA, he decided he'd let their hands be. He wanted to take every part of her in right now.

"Yeah." He smirked, and slightly squeezed onto her hand, not caring about Natsu, Lucy, Erza, or anyone seeing them at that moment in time. She was all his. Not only was she his, but she was it. She was really the one.

"I'm just fine."

[auroraphilealis]

Metamorphosis (1/10)

Metamorphosis (1/10) | Once upon a time, Dan Howell and Phil Lester were best friends. They did everything together, from hanging out at each other’s house, to sitting next to each other at school - but one day, Dan was torn away from Phil by none other than Phil himself. Five years on, and Dan still doesn’t know why his best friend threw Dan away. Was it the fault of the bullies who relentlessly picked on Phil, or was it Dan himself? Dan just didn’t know. So when a chance to protect Phil and get his best friend back arises, Dan jumps on it in a heartbeat, and uses his own confidence to boost Phil’s just enough to make the bullies back away. | Phan | Teen and Up | High School AU, Bullying, Getting Together, Make Over Fic, Kissing Booth, Kissing Lessons | 2,641 Words this chapter 

Disclaimer: In no way do I pretend that this is real or cast aspersions on Dan or Phil.

This has been a roller coaster to work on, and I loved every second of it. It is truly the fluffiest thing I have ever written, and I truly hope that you guys will enjoy it as it goes up these next few months. As the entire fic has been pre-written, I will be posting on Wednesdays and Saturdays every week! If you’d like to receive writing updates, chapter snippets, or even be given the chapter a whole day earlier than everyone else, please consider pledging to my patreon, which can be found here!

I would also like to give special thanks to my beta @etoilesdephan for her wonderful help editing this fic. Their feedback has made me incredibly happy and, of course, they’ve done the gracious work of fixing my typos hahaha. Thank you phantom <333

(Ao3) 

Chapter One

Once upon a time, Dan Howell and Phil Lester were best friends. They did everything together, from hanging out at each other’s houses, to sitting next to each other at school. They were absolutely inseparable, and for a long time, Dan had thought it would always be like that. He couldn’t imagine what his life would be like without Phil by his side, and he didn’t want to.

That’s why it came as such a shock to him when he went from seeing Phil every single day, laughing and teasing him on the playground and wrestling him for the video game controller in each other’s rooms, to not even knowing what his best friend had done over summer vacation.

It happened insanely quickly. They were eleven years old, and the school year was just coming to a close. Phil had, at one point that year, attempted to dye his hair a ridiculous shade of red when it came out orange, and while Dan had thought it was hilarious and loved the way it brought out the freckles on Phil’s pale skin, the rest of the school had taken this as an excuse to tease him even more than they already did.

He went from getting bullied from time to time when he was alone and Dan wasn’t around to give the older kids a dirty look, to being poked fun at by even the kids in their grade and below. Phil skyrocketed from that weird boy that sometimes walked the playground alone with the hood of his black jacket pulled up over his head, muttering something about “the shadow world,” to being that freak with the orange hair who bred hamsters and didn’t know how to speak up for himself.

It was horrid, and while Dan did his best to push away the people who tried to hurt his best friend, he couldn’t be there to protect Phil from everything, no matter how badly he wished he could be. See, Dan Howell, in opposition to Phil, was actually pretty well liked by most of their school, confident and just dramatic enough to make all the other kids laugh, but nice enough not to make any waves. Much of their grade questioned why Dan was even friends with a freak like Phil, but Dan had always only answered that Phil wasn’t a freak, and that if people just took the time to get to know him, they’d see that too.

The issue was, Phil was kind of an odd ball, even Dan could admit to that. He had a different way of seeing the world, a creativity that rivaled even Dan’s, and while that was something Dan loved and cherished about Phil, it wasn’t so easily accepted by the rest of their school.

So Dan did his best to protect Phil, never wanting to see his best friend change, or hurt himself because of the horrible actions of others. However, that didn’t mean that Dan could always be there to protect Phil, and it was no surprise that sometimes, Dan didn’t have enough time to prevent Phil from getting his ass kicked behind the playground, face shoved into the dirt and eyes watering from the sensation of his glasses being forcibly pressed into his skin.

Of course, that day, the final day of the year, Dan found himself cornered in the classroom by a bunch of classmates who insisted they needed a signature from Dan, because they’d all be moving off to secondary school after that summer, and some of them might never see Dan again. Unaware of anything strange going on, Dan had laughed and agreed to sign all their yearbooks, only to realize, far too late, that Phil was nowhere to be seen. The thing was, Phil was quiet, and often Dan forgot he was even around, when other people were talking, but he never went anywhere without Dan. Sometimes, Dan thought Phil was like a lost puppy, trailing after him and begging for attention, something Dan was always willing to give despite wishing Phil were more confident and sure in the friendship the two of them held.

When Dan realized Phil wasn’t there, of course, he figured out what exactly was going on.

“Where’s Phil?” he remembered himself asking, dropping the pen he’d been holding to sign yet another yearbook, and instantly shoving past the few remaining classmates in front of him in order to get out of the classroom. No one answered him, but that was answer enough, and Dan had taken off running through the sliding glass door of their old classroom out towards the playground behind the school, likely unmonitored that afternoon because school was officially out, and summer was about to start.

He was right, of course. Before he even reached the back of one of the slides, where older students were known to take their victims, Dan could hear Phil crying out as he was likely shoved into the dirt. There were other voices, shouting teasing, hurtful words, but Dan couldn’t hear a word of what they were saying for the way his heart was breaking at the sound of Phil’s near screams. He could feel his chest clenching, and he was screaming profanities inside of his own head for being so stupid as to have not made sure Phil was still there.

How had Dan let this happen?

Dan only really remembers tackling the older boys after that, the sensation of his own body hurling into the back of another, and sending them both tumbling to the floor. A fight had broken out, and Dan remembered getting his ass kicked for the very first time while, beside him, Phil cried for them to leave Dan alone.

Dan had given as good as he got, but in the end, he was left on the ground, outnumbered, and with a mix of a bloody nose and a black eye.

Phil had walked him home, and that had been the last time they spoke.

The very next day, Dan remembered waking up early and going over to Phil’s house despite his mum’s protests, only for Phil’s mum to answer the door and tell Dan uncertainly that Phil wasn’t feeling well enough for visitors right now. He’d tried again, and again, and again for a week straight, before learning that Phil had asked to visit his grandparents for the summer, and wouldn’t be home until after school started once again.

Dan had written letters that Phil’s mum promised to send, but there was something about the look on her face that told Dan she knew something that Dan did not, and that she hurt for him. The first time she told Dan that she hoped he could one day help Phil like he always had in the past, Dan finally realized that it was the end.

He waited with baited breath for Phil to show up on the first day of class, only to realize by the end of the day that Phil had gone out of his way to avoid him. The last thing he remembered clearly was the sight of Phil’s broken, sad face, as he ran straight home after school without so much as a glance backwards at Dan, who’d shouted after him to wait.

Dan never could figure out what happened that day, or why Phil had decided to stop being Dan’s friend. He didn’t understand why Phil no longer thanked him when Dan tried to save him from the bullies, or why, once, he turned on Dan and told him to get the fuck away from him, and never get in the way again. He didn’t understand how he and Phil could go from being so close they were practically one person, to becoming so different some people even forgot they’d ever been friends.

It hurt. It hurt a lot, and it was hard, but eventually, Dan got the message. For whatever strange reason, Phil didn’t want Dan protecting him anymore, didn’t even want to know him, and while Dan knew it was the fault of the bullies, he’d never forgive himself for having done something to turn Phil against him. Was it because Dan hadn’t been there to save him in the first place, that afternoon when the bullies managed to get Phil alone? Had the bullies said something to Phil about Dan that had made Phil turn on him?

Dan didn’t know, and he probably wouldn’t ever know, but that didn’t prevent him from hoping.

So Dan Howell passed every year from the age of eleven to sixteen praying that, one day, Phil would come back into his life, and he’d be able to protect the boy he’d always considered the best person in the whole entire world.

In the meantime, Dan finally started branching out and making new friends, all while he watched Phil disappear further and further into the shadows until it was almost impossible to make sure he even still existed, except for the few times Dan saw him peeking out through the curtains of his bedroom window and out over at Dan’s, like there was still a part of him that missed Dan too.

They’d been next door neighbors for so long that Dan was actually almost surprised that, by the time they were finally forced together again, it hadn’t happened any sooner.

In the Fall of year twelve, Phil Lester unexpectedly joined the theater club, and the only reason Dan even noticed him was the fact that literally every single person but Phil had grouped up on one side of the large auditorium the first day of their meeting, and were whispering about the weird, dark boy they’d never seen before. Dan wandered in with his brow furrowed, heading straight for the strange group, when he felt his shoulder bump into the body of someone he hadn’t even noticed was there.

“Sorry,” he said rather quickly, turning to offer an awkward smile to the person he’d run into, and frowning as the entire auditorium seemed to go quiet. “I didn’t see you there, uhm,” Dan started, trailing off as he waited for the other person to give him their name, only they never answered.

Instead, they dropped their face further away from Dan, as if they were ashamed to be seen by him, and only then did Dan realize it was Phil.

He was dressed in the same black hoodie Dan swore Phil had owned since he was eleven, except it couldn’t be because Phil had grown almost as tall and lanky as Dan and the thing still fit, and he had his hood up, hiding the mousy brown of his ridiculously long hair. His glasses were thick rimmed and roundish, mostly hidden by his fringe, and his face was even more pale than Dan remembered.

His hands were stuck in his pockets, and his backpack pressed tight against his back, flat, like he’d taken to carrying very little in case he was jumped.

Dan’s jaw dropped open.

“Phil?” he asked tentatively. He could feel his heart in his throat, constricting his airways, because what was Phil doing here? Did he know this was the theater club? Had he come to see Dan? Unsure, Dan reached out to take Phil’s arm in his, wanting to pull the boy close and drag him into a long needed hug - it had been so long since Phil had been close enough for Dan to touch, after all - only, before Dan could touch him, Phil jerked back and stumbled so hard, he fell flat on his ass, his hood falling back and his hair splaying everywhere, exposing the red of his heated cheeks.

His eyes were just as blue as Dan had remembered them, but they were gazing up at Dan in horror.

“Okay, break it up you two, that’s enough! Really, Daniel, I expected more from you!” Mrs. Gio suddenly shouted, sweeping into the auditorium at exactly the wrong time. Dan’s gaze snapped up from where Phil sat, practically trembling on the floor, as if he were afraid of Dan, back to his teacher with his mouth half open with the intent to explain.

Before he could, however, or even turn back to help Phil up off of the floor, the rest of the theater group behind him burst into explanations, screaming that Dan had just been trying to be nice when Phil had shoved at him and fallen to the ground himself. Dan felt his cheeks beginning to go red as he worked to get in a word edgewise, begging the others to stop, that that wasn’t what had happened, but the others were too loud for him. Mrs. Gio looked thunderstruck and a little overwhelmed, blinking wildly at the loud shouting around her, before finally she burst out with a loud “Enough!” that shut the entire room up.

“I don’t care whose fault it was,” she admonished the group, “I expect better from all of you than to harass any of the other students here, let alone a new member this year. You’re all going to be working together for the next twelve months, so you better be ready to get along!” she said.

Mortified, Dan turned back to Phil with the full intent of helping him back up off the ground, only to find that Phil had already gotten up and had retreated further away from the group, hiding his face, and clearly trying once more to fade into the shadows.

Dan bit his lip, unsure what he was meant to do. The drama teacher answered this for him, however, and before he knew it, she was clapping her hands and ordering everyone to sit in the chairs in front of her in a large group, and listen up. Dan and the others shuffled about, with Dan’s friends coming and insisting he sit with them, laughing and making jokes about summer that Dan couldn’t help responding to, all while Phil managed to find a seat still near enough to Mrs. Gio not to get in trouble, but far enough away from the rest of the group that it almost looked like he didn’t even belong.

As Mrs. Gio started talking about the two performances they were going to be putting on that year, Dan couldn’t help wondering what Phil was even doing there. He’d always been creative, sure, but Dan had never known him to be confident enough to actually perform in a play. In fact, Phil looked so out of place that Dan couldn’t imagine Phil’s confidence had grown any stronger.

Dan had always seeked to fix that when they were kids, but it had been hard work. He’d never once given up, but he’d always refused to push Phil, and now, here they were, so close and yet so far, and Dan wanted nothing more than to drag Phil into the group and make him loved. He had the most amazing mind that Dan had ever known, and despite how they’d grown apart, Dan knew that that much, at least, could not have changed.

He found his eyes following every one of Phil’s movements for the rest of the afternoon, but never once did Phil meet his gaze. Slowly but surely, Dan felt his heart sink ever more, and sighed as Mrs. Gio dismissed them and Phil took off like a ghost.

The others laughed and snickered at the new weird guy, asking what his name was again, and making fun of the way his hair hung in his face and the ugly pair of spectacles he chose to wear. Dan, all the while, did his best to tune the others out, and shuffled out of the school building to head home. He could only hope that, as time wore on, he’d finally get the chance to be friends with Phil again.

(Next)