#he looks the same as a woman and thats funny to me.

[hraeesvelgr]

[headless-horsepossum]

So I watched little shop of horrors recently for the first time since I was like A Teen and realized that Seymour and Audrey are like...... the most T4T a theoretically-cis couple can possible be. Their outfits and their mannerisms and their VOICES, and the choices they make and the things they want are like. SUCH SPECIFIC TRANS ENERGY. like insecure low-income shitty-environment trans people. Like I KNOW that goofy little trans guy with his three-sizes-too-big short sleeve button-downs and his Smallness and his silly little baseball cap. I have HEARD that Voice that Audrey is doing, I've seen that Makeup and that Dress and those SHOES!!!!

So the problem is that like. I am now fucking Desperate to see a production of little shop where seymour and audrey are a t4t couple. I feel like it would change the tone, add sincerity in with the irony in a way that would be REALLY COMPELLING AND SEXY!!!! I feel like there's a way that talented actors and singers could play it that would be so caTHARTIC and it would fucking RULE!!!!

But!!!! There are uhhh. 3 problems. With this.

1. Audrey 2 and Mr Mushnik (idk how you spell that) are. At least in the movie. Pretty Fucked Up and Racist and Anti-Semitic I Think. I have no idea how you get around that (or what to do with Audrey II at all, honestly, though I feel like there's def interesting directions you could go with it). I kind of think this is surmountable if you worked with people from the appropriate communities, Maybe.

2. It absolutely has to have the movie ending NOT the show ending and idk if that's, like, Allowed

3. I. I wanna be seymour. I wanna be seymour so bad 😭😭😭😭

[sinning-23]

Calling Them By Their Full Name

OPLA Headcannons! I thought htis was a funny little thing lol. Anyway enjoy

Warnings: slight mentions of nsfw topics but nothing too serious

Sorry for any spelling errors!

Luffy

-ohhhhh that did not sound like your usual happy, loving voice.

-he knows he fucked up and now he’s hiding from your wrath.

-“MONKEY D. LUFFY, GET YOUR ASS IN THIS KITCHEN. NOW.”

-you could hear a pen drop from how quiet the ship got

-ok so maybe he ate that super expensive, super special dessert you had been saving for a while now. And like, it was going to go bad! All he wanted was a little taste! Than a taste turned into accidentally eating the whole thing.

-He was gonna tell you, honest! But it had proven obvious you found out before he could. He seen you round the corner with RAGe on your face and tears in your eyes.

-"TRAITOR!" You yell, throwing a tired punch to his chest.

-“I’m sorry mami, I’ll find you another one. Promise.” He hums, peppering your face with kisses, squeezing your face between his palms when he did.

-There’s no way you could stay mad at him for long

Zoro

-whoa whoa whoa why are you so ANNNGRY

-hated when you call him by his full name like that, makes him feel like a child being reprimanded

-“RORONOA GODDAMN ZORO.” You boom, Nami’s jaw dropping at the sound. Even she could tell you were pissed

-he’s the sassiest mf alive so he’ll probably just be like, “who the hell are talking to woman?!”

-“You’re a real piece of work you know that??” You’re still yelling and he wastes no time rolling his eyes at you and grabbing you by your waist, the action shutting you up.

“Wanna stop yelling and be a big girl and tell me what’s wrong?” He teases, that stupid smirk you love falling over his features at your speechlessness.

-It’s not often you say his full make but when you do he makes sure you’ll never forget it that same night.

-“Say my name baby, real loud.” He groans, a hand around your throat to steady spent body as he slams back into you

Sanji

-I know thats not a cigarette i smell Vinsmoke Sanji."

-awe hell. Yout tone is deadly. he tried he damndest to stomp it out before you rounded the corner but nope.

-You never use his full name like that. Never.

-did he just get chills?

-"Of course not my love!" He lies throigh his teeth but before he can say anything ese you re lips are on his, you fist gripping the fabric of his shirt.

-He knew he was caught, the taste of tobacco mixing with your usual mint. You pull away, smoothing his shirt out with a warning smile.

-"Don’t lie to me again, I’ll always know when you do, Black Leg." You explain , taking the small cardboard box from his pocket and walking off.

-Even though it was ment as a threat, he couldn't help but feel hotter than ususal. God he loved it when you talked all serious to him.

Bonus: Mihawk

-You know better than to use his full name. Orr to even call him anything besides the usual endearing pet name.

-So when he hears his name called with nothing short of rage, hes trying to figure out who you think you’re talking to.

-"Dracule. Mihawk." You spit, holding the empty bottle in your hand

-Ok so your rage was warented cause he managed to drink the entire vintage bottle of wine you'd been saving...it wasn’t like it was on purpose!

-He doesn’t even bother to look up from his book, just barely giving you a slight glance when you were right in front of him, pointing to the bottle.

-"Id watch your tone darling." he warns, smirking at the way you purse your lips and turn away with a fierce attitude he'd be sure to deal with later.

-“Oh shove it up your ass Dracule.” You scoff, trying to quicken your pace but failing when he’s already behind you, his much larger hand holding your wrist as you yelp.

-His look says it all. You’re screwed.

-So now you’re sitting pretty, bent over and counting each time his hand meets the sore and slightly reddened flesh of your ass.

-“Now, what’s my name again darling?”

[zeldasnotes]

ASTRO OBSERVATIONS 33

masterlist

• People with Sun in the 8th house or aspecting Pluto might have been saved from situations because of their fathers name. For example might be threathened then the people find who your father is and apologizes.

• If you ask someone whats the worst thing someone ever said to them it will probably be something related to their Chiron placement. Because A when people touch our Chiron wound we remember it forever and B for some damn reason people seem to always touch where you have your Chiron wound bc its kinda obvious to others.

• If you have 10th house placements you have a trademark after your name, whatever you do you easily become known for it. People want to put a label on you and the themes of the planet you have there is the label thats most easily put. So when you have 10th house planets its extra important to think before you act.

• If you have Lilith conjunct North Node you need to learn to do your own thing. Ive seen people with this who didnt reach their potential until they refused to stop trying to fit in and be ”normal” . You are a class of your own. People will respond to you differently when you act like Lilith. Example: A rapper in my country have this placement in Virgo and was treated bad by other rappers bc of a beef he had on the streets and bla bla. Anyways he knew he wouldnt get collabs bc of this so he made it ”his” thing to never have a feature on his songs and to never do interviews and be on other rappers tracks. After this people started respecting him more. He used his inability to fit in to make himself look even better.

• Venus/Neptune involve their love interest in their art. A lot of rappers with this might want to have their partner on their albumcover, in their music video, paint their partner etc. Dating a man with this placement feels like being his muse.

• Be careful when you have Venus in Leo in the Solar Return Chart because this one can really make you want to SPLURGE. Especially clothes, bags and stuff that makes you look good. 💰🛒🛍️💸

• Talking to someone with a Mercury/Pluto or Mercury/Nessus placement can feel like being interrogated. Constant checking if you are lying, asking extra questions to see if you change your story, detailed questions to see if your story is true. Can be very exhausting to be around bc of this (sorry).

• Every Aquarius Rising Ive met looked better in person than on pictures. There is a striking quality that the camera have a hard time capturing. Same with Virgo and Pisces Rising.

• People with Jupiter conjunct personal planets are funnier when they are not trying than when they try to be funny.

• Nanisca the role played by Viola Davis in the movie ”Woman King” reminds me of Sun conjunct Lilith.

• People with Ceres(1) conjunct personal planets seem to not like adornment.

• Aura(1488) conjunct Mercury might come across as sneaky.

• Venus in the 8th house or Venus aspecting Pluto attracts people who would normally not want them which is why they need to be extra careful. They might be super tall and attract someone who usually only go for short people or vice versa. But because of the intense magnetism that having a plutonian venus gives everyone wants a taste of you no matter if they really WANT you or not. Be wary of who you share your energy with.

• Venus Square MC might feel like their looks and social skills doesnt match the career they want or how they want the public to see them.

• Juno(3) or Venus Square Mars are the kind of people to have a huge difference in taste when it comes to who they want to sleep with and who they see as relationship material.

• If you have Lilith in the 7th house or Lilith conjunct Venus your ex's new partners might become obsessed with you or you become obsessed with your partners ex's.

• Dejanira(157) conjunct Ascendant is probably the scariest synastry aspect Ive ever experienced. Experienced it 2 times and both times I was Ascendant and he was Dejanira. Very scary attacks. I can even look at pictures of these people.

• Mars conjunct MC can mean a lot of people are scared of you. A very intimidating placement. In a mans chart it makes other men look up to him. Women with this placement seem too struggle with this placement a lot tho since people are more likely to want to challenge a woman who comes across as intimidating.

• Scorpio Moons seem to be very fascinated with psychopaths.

• Sag Moons might have had extremely carefree parents. Thats why these people can be so good on their own, they raised themselves. But its also why they flee from issues because they were never forced to stay and solve stuff like in a normal family.

• Cancer Risings can be really intimidating, especially the eyes. Ive mistaken so many Cancer Risings for being Scorpio Risings.

• Populus(8647) conjunct Mercury might be more popular among younger people.

• Lilith in a womans chart seem to show what archetype she finds empowering and might even want to be and in a mans chart an archetype he finds fascinating. Ex. Lilith 2nd/8th: the golddigger femme fatale, black widow. Lilith 4th house: The family matriarch, Evil Stepmom. Lilith 10th house: The boss, the businesswoman, cold bitch. Lilith 7th house: The homewrecker, femme fatale, beauty queen, homecoming queen, Mr steal yo girl. (Not always ofc and mostly this goes for when you are underdeveloped)

©️ 2024 Zeldas Notes All Rights Reserved

[licensedproldier]

highlights from the brennan hank interview (aka taking notes on things that i liked or didn't know)

HE STARTED ATTENDING COLLEGE WHEN HE WAS 14?????

immediate jump off topic from hank to ask him about d20 (this happened while fhjy was airing)

"and the greatest project of all, my wonderful family with my wife isabella roland"

bonding over their children

brennan and hank's son both corrected their father's bedtime stories 💀

many elaine lee shoutouts

"his dad met my mom and fell in love" "you did that" "we did that, parent-trapped them"

was pulled out of school in 4th grade for homeschooling because the bullying was so bad....

started a company when they (he and his brother) were fifteen?? called Bootleg Adventures

hank's little awed hiss of "what" to the above piece of information

GOT PART OWNERSHIP OF THE WAYFINDER COMPANY AT 15

"knowledge is something that, when you share it, there's just more. there's no scarcity"

hank staring off into space slightly looking like brennan just blew his mind (we're 11 minutes in)

"we were 14 year old philosophy majors, if you can imagine anything more normal than that"

brennan unable to resist doing fun voices for the people he talks about

he wouldve loved to work at wayfinder full time and said back then hey maybe ill become a famous internet comedian or something and that's how i can help camp. now he's got texts from the staff saying how a bunch of dimension 20 fans have joined and its been a huge boon for them that way 🥺

"it's funny when a really bad plan works. dont make that plan."

"every new community-- is this too sad? no its true" THOSE THINGS ARE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE

anyway "for every new community i start with the presupposition that someone is going to pick me up and put me in the trash can" 😭

hank sniping him through the duplex door with "[when you do that] you kind of imagine yourself to be the value you're delivering rather than yourself, or that your value is in what you deliver and not who you are" and brennan going 😐 "that's a great point man"

both of them turning to do pained smiles at the camera 😭

"i think the value is in who you are" "that's really sweet i appreciate that" "but i also love that you deliver"

brennan quoting mary oliver

im starting to feel a little called out guys

robert mckee "stories are not about their premises they're about their conclusions"

brennan also staring off into space slightly thinking about what hank said

the REAL college advice brennan is giving is reportedly "put an egg in your ramen" because thats how you stop your eyes from going "matte finish"

shoutout to vanessa's dumplings for keeping this man alive

"i am ozymandias nerd of nerds, gaze upon my banner and despair"

the moment he felt like something changed was walking into C2E2 and seeing that the biggest hanging banner in the convention hall was of fantasy high. or, as brennan put it, "my dumb face"

"my friends moved in with their partners, the apartment i had with them scattered to the wind, the woman i was dating dumped me after three weeks, and i won a bunch of money on Who Wants to Be a Millionare" "wh- what???"

he taught emily, murph, siobhan, and zac how to play dnd 🥺 and was running a home game for lou at the same time

got hired at um, actually because his name was getting around for being a big dork

zac stepped down from troopers and sam liked brennan's character from a previous casting call (tim curry eating pizza) so he brought him in

its very charming the detail with which brennan remembers these important moments in his life

became a full time cast member in the same week he started dating izzy! "hard to beat week gang!"

"they told us they were launching dropout and everyone had to make a show, which, if you're been trying to make a show your whole life, that's like saying 'bad news guys, there's 24 birthday cakes in the break room and everyone has to eat a whole birthday cake'."

brennan was making a document for a market pitch on an actual-play show when he was called into office and THEY pitched HIM the idea of an actual-play show

"i guess i have tumbled through life to end up here ready to do this"

truly like. one of the guys of all time.

"some of the things that didn't make sense about you make more sense now" hank talking indirectly about how amazing he found all the moving parts of mentopolis and now getting to hear about how long and how many time he's done storytelling it makes sense

"yeah its the one skill"

"i wanted to tell stories before i was anything else"

🎉anti-capitalist rant🎉

"people used to say 'is ucb a cult' and i'd say 'in a cult, somebody is making money'"

HIGH FIVE!!!

[whyse7vn]

MOVING OUT -

[ot7 x reader]

BFFS 😁💜

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

jk: #NEWYEARNEWHOME

#NEWME 🙌🏼

hobi: don’t want to know don’t care shut up

jin: what now

jimin: sighs

tae: AWOMAN 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

yooongi: …

jk: #newbeginings 🙏🏼

namjoon: ??

jk: i’m moving out guys 😆

like living on my own

me

i am

no joke

real life

living with y/n era OVER

hobi: attention seeker

jin: idk if you can even survive on ur own

y/n: he’s being stupid

ignore him pls

jk: house warming party soon guys!!!!

everyone invited unless ur name starts with a j

yoongi: your name starts with a j

jk: everyone invited unless ur surname starts with a j

yoongi: are you stupid

jin: is this about y/ns new bf lmao

y/n: i brought jaehyun over ONCE and now kooks spiralling

jk: idk who is jaehyun sorry idk who that is or what ur talking about sorry idk a thing

namjoon: sighs

yoongi: lowkey valid

y/n: ????????

yoongi: i mean if we were living together and you brought a rat back home i would loose my mind a bit

y/n: namjoon

namjoon: yoongi

yoongi: just saying

jimin: LMAOOO

y/n: not funny

jimin: just a little bit

tae: i heard jaehyun a world famous cheater

y/n: guys

hobi: look you made her upset

jk: y/ns upset?

jin: yikes

jimin: it’s not even my fault

yoongi just makes me giggle some times

yoongi: 🫰🏼

tae: i’ll hold you bbg sshhh don’t cry

namjoon: ew

y/n: i really really like him ok

so if you all could actually maybe just give him a chance and not be assholes for once i would really appreciate it

hobi: ofc pretty <3

jimin: ok but do you love him

namjoon: jimin

jimin: WHAT sorry i really need to know

jk: DONT ANSWER THAT

jin: woah

jk: i mean you don’t have to answer that haha

i’m still moving out btw

tae: i think you should give up i don’t think she’s gonna tell you to stay

omg like a dog

stay

i wish someone would tell me to stay

“stay 😡”

ok bae i’ll stay

am i ur good boy?

tell me i am

look at me

i stayed here

waiting for you

tell me i’m your good boy tell me please

hobi: bro

tae: sorry got lost in the source

namjoon: you mean the sauce?

tae: yesss mayo!!

@y/n tell me to say

y/n: absolutely not

i can tell you to kys tho

tae: Keep Yourself here and Stay

a win for kim taehyung

y/n: kill yourself

tae: no

heheheh

i’m a bad boy tonight

what you gonna do about it 😝

jimin: oh my god stop talking

tae: she wants me

y/n: she has a boyfriend

tae: never even seen that man in the same room as you

u sure you not making this relationship up

y/n: do i need to send you a fucking sex tape to prove it

tae: i mean…..

if you want lol

y/n: ur gross

tae: you’ve kissed me

y/n: top ten worst moments of my life

tae: WOAHHHHHHH

UMMM

OK NOW YOU’VE CROSSED A LINE

namjoon: enough

both of you

y/n: taes a shit kisser

tae: NO I AM NOT

NAMJOON TELL HER IM

NOT OHMYGOD HOW DARE SHE

namjoon: wydm tell her?

ur acting like i’ve kissed you to know

tae: i’ll kiss you

namjoon: i’m going to block you

tae: I AM NOT A SHIT KISSER

jimin: tae can’t kiss tae can’t kiss

tae: STOP I CAN

hobi: that’s really sad actually

jk: can someone do me a favour

yoongi: no

namjoon: what’s the favour?

yoongi: it’s gonna be something stupid

jk: joon can you buy me a house??

yoongi: shocker!!

tae: guys i’m a great kisser ask all the girls i’ve kissed

jimin: girls?

the only other girl you’ve kissed is jennie

tae: THATS NOT TRUE I NEVER KISSED THAT WOMAN IN MY LIFE

hobi: she didn’t let you kiss her even tho you flew all the way to paris for her??

that’s crazy

jin: maybe she was waiting for marriage

y/n: maybe she was waiting for the police

namjoon: i am not buying you a house are you out of ur mind??

jk: but how i’m i supposed to move out?

namjoon: buy ur own house?

tae: why would she be waiting for the police??????

jin: being seen with you is a crime in itself

don’t even get me started of being seen publicly HOLDING HANDS with you

hobi: right yikes

jimin: what’s the french police number?

y/n: fuck knows

jin: baguette snail croisant

jimin: those are not numbers

hobi: isn’t that racist?

jin: to who?

hobi: the french??

jin: you can be racist to the french???????

hobi: i think idk???

jin: shit you better lock me up then

been oui oui baguette eiffel tower bonejawing my whole life

y/n: bonejaw??????????

tae: jin ur like a mega racist…

hobi: do you like trump be honest

jin: tf is trump

jk: namjoon pls oh pls 🥺🥺🥺🥺

yoongi: can you guys not have 2 conversations at once thanks

tae: just say you can’t keep up

yoongi: just kill yourself

tae: WOAH

namjoon get him!!!!

namjoon: am i a dog??

why do i have to always get someone

i think you guys need to learn how to fight ur own battles

tae: dog

“stay😡😡😡😡”

w-what’s happening to me 😰😭

🧍🏻‍♂️… 🧎🏻‍♂️…. 🐕

arf? 🥺

*head tilt*

jimin: this is why women avoid you

tae: take a leaf out of my book bro

jimin: would genuinely rather die

hobi: /gen /srs

yoongi: /kys

jin: wait so jungkooks moving out but doesn’t have a home to move into

jk: i can always move in with yoongi

yoongi: LOL

jk: or jimin

jimin: wow the weather is great today guys 😆

jk: hobi will have me

hobi: no!

jk: jin joon??

namjoon: give up

jin: are you silly

tae: i could

jk: no thank you ❤️

tae: wtf

y/n: LMAO

tae: what’s wrong with living with me???

jk: u scare me a lot i’m sorry

tae: fucking bitch

jimin: what if y/n moved in with jaehyun then you have the house to urself?

jk: ARE YOU SILLY???

WHY WOULD I WANT THAT

IMG THE THOUGHT OF THAT MAKES ME WANT YO THROW UP

NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN

jimin: woah ok don’t shoot me in the head tf??

thought you wanted this independent life

y/n: i mean i can if that’s what u really want kook

jk: KOOK HEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHE

my knees just gave out >.<

WAIT NO DONT MOVE IN WITH HIM YOU DONT HAVE TO IM SORRY NO DONT DO THAT

jin: u make me wanna throw up

jk: i love living with you!!! i’m sorry i’m not gonna move out so please don’t move out either living with you has been and IS the best thing that’s ever happened to me please don’t go

hobi: that’s a shinee song

jimin: didn’t she fuck a shinee member LMAO 💀

namjoon: jimin

jimin: sorrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

tae: so you can fight her battles for her but fighting mine is an issue????

ok sexism IS real females were onto something with this one

y/n: females??

yoongi: they way you dig urself deeper and deeper into unlikeability is truly insane

tae: my fault feminist yoongi here to get my ass 💀💀💀💀

NO IM SORRY I DIDNt MEAN THAT LMAOO

PLS DONT HURT ME

IDK WHY I SAID THAT

THE DEMONS TOOK OVER FOR A SEC

NO JOKE BLACKED OUT

DONT EVEN REMEMBER SAYING THAT

NAMJOON TELL HIM IT WAS A MISTAKE

JOON

KIM NAMJOON TELL HIM TELL HIM

hobi: tell me tell me tttttell me

yoongi: i’m gonna shoot him

namjoon: understandable

hobi: it’s the love shot

jk: i’m not moving out guys

jin: no shit

y/n: hobi answer my ft >_<

hobi: give me one sec my love!!!!!!!!!!

jimin: woah???

jin: uhhhhhhhh

tae: group ft ❤️!!

y/n: kys!!

tae: why do girls not fuck with the nice guys anymore

hobi blew up a school once

hobi: ??

tae: get off the phone so my gf can call ME

yoongi: i beg you to shut the fuck up

tae: beggar

jimin: that coming from you is actually insane tae!

tae: what

namjoon: so whose hosting games night this week

yoongi: not me

jin: i did it last time

jimin: my place is real messy

hobi: don’t wanna :/

tae: i refuse in protest of tae respect and love in this gc

y/n: me and jk can

since he’s not moving out and all

jk: 😁!!

namjoon: cool

everyone ok with that?

jin: yup

jimin: ok

yoongi: yes

tae: whatever lol

hobi: y/n why don’t you invite jaehyun??

so we can all properly meet him

you’ve met his members right??

he should meet yours no?

yoongi: ?????

tae: ARE YOU SILLY

jin: ur so wrong for that

y/n: ahhhh idk

i mean i have met his members

and i really do want you guys to properly meet him as well…

jimin: somethings going on

jk: haha yeah lol i mean i’ve met him already

he was my friend lol haha not that it matters but that’s ok

did i say was ?? i meant is lol sorry i wouldn’t stop being his friend just cuz he’s dating you that would be silly

but yeah but if you want him to come that’s cool

but he really really really doesn’t need to haha

namjoon: y/n bring your boyfriend

y/n: are you sure???

tae: NO??£:£:££:

jin: yes!!! #drama

jimin: ofc

yoongi: whatever

jk: hahah lol hahah

y/n: ok

hobi: great ☺️!!!

cant wait

jimin: i bet

hobi: ??

jimin: nothing

hobi: y/n answer :p

y/n: okokokokokokokokok

jimin: i’m gonna do some deep diving i’ll talk to you all later

(unfortunately)

(and by force not cuz i like you)

(the talking to you later part not the diving part)

bye

jk: woah didn’t know jimin was a diver

yoongi: ur stupid

@y/n reply to my message

bye

jin: wow guys i’m really exited for games night

gotta stock up on the alcohol

so i guess i’m going too

bye 👋🏻

tae: good i’m going as well

i’ve got to go and punch a wall

jungkook come over

this is srs business

jk: okay ^_^

getting in my car

speak to you all later 💓

hobi: y/n told me to tell you all bye

so bye from her and bye from me

😁🫰🏼😁🫰🏼😁🫰🏼😁🫰🏼😁🫰🏼😁🫰🏼

namjoon: woah

did we

did we just end a conversation normally….

oh my god

wow

guys wow omg

this is the first time this has happened

wow

i’m in shock

this is such a big step for us

i’m so proud

um

wow

what do i even say rn

….

um

yoongi: how about goodbye

blowing up my phone for no reason

namjoon: no ur right i’m sorry

goodbye guys

um

have a good day???

yeah

um wow

yeah have a good day guys i mean it

i honestly and truly mean it

wow

yeah and

yoongi removed namjoon from “BFFS 😁💜”

—

hobi sus

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie

[iouinotes]

"The Cole Effect" | Cole Walter

pairing: Cole Walter x female!reader

show: My life with the Walter Boys

warnings: smut, but just a little (I had to after seeing him in that last scene)

word count: 4k

summary: Cole asks the reader out on a date and after he convinced her, they spend a fun (if you know you know) evening together.

a/n: please pretend that his restored car has backseats...thanks (also I'm sorry for the way this ff ended. I wanted to write smut all the way, but it just didnt feel right anymore after the first half. So please enjoy the rest of it and bear with me...)

"So, when do I pick you up?"

He leans against my locker, looking over my shoulder and reading my notes. "Cole, how many times do I have to tell you? I dont have the time and patience, I'm sorry-" sighing I look at him, studying his smug grin.

"You have the chance to get to know me better. In my opinion, that sounds like the perfect way to spend the afternoon." He smiles at me, his eyes scanning my face.

The fact is, I didnt want to fall in love with him and I knew, if I would let him take me out, it wouldnt turn out for the best. Well, mostly for me. He would probably date the next woman, that would catch his eye. And I would be on his list, sitting at home on the weekends and waiting for him to call. No, that wasnt how I planned to spend my time.

I mean, he obviously is very handsome, blonde hair, dreamy eyes, pink lips that somehow always look kissable. And to be honest, sometimes when I get lost in a daydream, forgetting about the math class, he appears in my head. Always smiling as bright as the sun. I dont know what it is, but something about him is so attractive, I dont even know how to discribe it.

Of course, I'm not the only one who feels that sort of attraction. His magical appearance, how he talks, walks, smiles, flirts.

It´s called "the Cole effect". For most of the time, I didnt really get it. But as soon as his eyes landed on me, as soon as he talked to me, trust me, I got it. He is charming, enchanting, funny and he has a way with words that makes it addictive to hear his voice.

It´s crazy, but it is reality.

When I look at him now, I feel another pair of eyes watching me. Erin. The girl, who is in a on-off realtionship with him. Cole has many women, who want him, not just because he is popular. But because he is what every girl dreams of. Thats the problem, he is a dream till he gets bored and then you find yourself in your own nightmare.

"Its just- I cant. Also, there is a really pretty and wonderful girl, standing right next to you, thats been waiting for you to notice her." I never unterstood how Cole could want someone else, when Erin existed.

"Well, Im currently talking to her, so I know when to pick her up." His eyes stay clued to me. Confused, I draw my eyebrows together. "But Erin is this way-" I turn my head to look at her, but at the same second I feel a finger tenderly turning my head back. I freeze, butterflies awake in my stomach and I have to keep myself from looking too flustered by his gesture. Of course, my body has its mind of his own, so I feel my cheeks turn red.

At that, he grins. "I know you feel it, beautiful. One date, thats all Im asking for. I promise, you will have a good time." Im too caught up in my emotions to think reasonable. So I quietly nod and feel myself holding my breath, when he leans down to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. His finger again, linger slightly on my cheek.

"See you then, 9 o'clock. I'll be on time, you have my word." Winking, he turns around and walks down the aisle.

Finally I get to breath again.

☀️☀️☀️☀️

Why the fuck did I agree to this? Standing infront of my mirror, I look at my summer dress, warm yellow colour with beautiful, little sunflowers on it. It was the dress, I got a lot of compliments for. But then again, what was my intention with wearing this dress? Im not sure.

While I pick out a golden necklace in the shape of a sun and put on a few bracelets, I leave my hair down and the way it always is. I don't want him to think that I'm trying too hard.

He knows the truth anyway.

A few minutes later, I hear the doorbell ring and with one last, deep breath I open the door. If I'm honest, I would have liked to close it straight away. Because there's no way to avoid staring at him the whole time when he looks like that. Wearing blue jeans, slightly oversize, a white tank top and his red jersey. He looks hot, in a way I want to spend the rest of the day, riding something other than his car. God, help me survive this.

To my suprise, he is quiet the gentleman. He compliments my dress, he holds the door open to his car, he lets me pick the music and as I sit in the passanger seat, listining to Taylor Swift, I smile to myself. Unfortunetely I´m not very subtle about it, because he asks me right away about my good mood.

"I dont know, Im just having a good time, I guess." I look at him, while he is focusing on the road. I see one of his hand rising, so he dramatically holds onto his chest.

"I'm hurt. Did you think, I was that boring?" Laughing, I shake my head. "No, its not that. To best honest, I didnt expect myself to enjoy today." I turn my head and look at my lap, fiddling with my fingers. "Why not?" I see his head looking in my direction, a curious tone in his voice.

"I´ve had a hard time this last year, everything with school and you are- I mean, I dont know what intention do you have with me? Im not a one night stand type of person, I want something real. You know, like in the love songs, the real feelings, a real relationship. With a person, who wants me the same way, I feel about them. I think, thats the reason Im not sure, if this-" I gesture between us "is a good idea."

He´s quite for a moment and I feel more embarassed, the more seconds pass.

"Im sorry. I didnt mean that we´re going to be, you know like a thing. I respect your decision to spend your time with other girls, I didnt mean it is something bad. Its just-" He finishes my sentence. "-not for you. I know." His eyes are on the road, but I see his hands nervously tapping the wheel.

"Sorry, if I just crashed the vibe. I didnt intend to do it." I look at my hands. "No, its okay. Dont be sorry. I like your honesty. You know, you state your point. Thats good."

We look at each other and I try to search in his eyes for a sign, that he´s pissed. But he just lightly smiles at me, reaching out and holding my hands. While one of his hands is still on the wheel, of course. I feel myself blushing.

"Look, lets not pretend that I´m the best choice for a relationship or boyfriend material. Because I´m not and you knew that, even before you agreed to spend the afternoon with me. So, I´m just curious. Why did you change your mind?"

His thumb is massaging the back of my hand and I try not to settle with this warm feeling in my chest. "Because you dont give up that easily and it's hard not to give in to you." I see a smile tuck at his lips. "You think so?" I role my eyes.

"You know the affect you have on people, Cole. It wouldnt suprise me, if you run for president and won. People like you." He laughs at my comparison, turning the wheel and driving into the driveway to a nice restaurant. When he parks the car and turns of the light, he turns in my direction and looks at me.

"Do you like me?"

The question suprises me. "What?" I laugh quietly. "You said, people like me. So, do you like me too?" His eyes search mine.

"Well, if I would hate you, I think i wouldnt have agreed to go to dinner with you." He leans forward.

"Well you could just be here for the food?" I grin at him. "You got me, Im just hungry, sorry. Can we go in and be silent the entire time?" His hands are still holding mine, but now one of them is caressing my arm, leaving me with goosebumbs.

We sit in silent, but when he opens his mouth to break the comfortable atmosphere, Im shocked by his honest words.

"Well, I like you. You´re funny, endearing, honest and smart. You are nice to everyone, even if you have do deal with a guy like me, who gets on your nerves, so you agree to go on a date with him. It´s something about you, that is special and I would like to get to know you better. If you do, I promise you´ll get more food."

I smile at his last sentence, even though I dont know what to say. "God, you´re making me speechless." He leans even closer. "I can do many other things, that can make you speechless." At that I look at his lips. I see him grin and when I look up again, he is even closer than before.

"There are two choices now. One, we go into his lovely restaurant and talk about god knows what or two, we test whether the seats can be tilted backwards." At his voice I feel myself getting flustered. God knows, I would love to test what the car is capable of. But we´re out in a driveway, infront of a restaurant and people could see us. And even though I´m not really against the idea, its to early.

"Or three, we eat first and maybe later, you show me why I need to hate you less." He rises his eyebrows. "So you really are just here for the food." I laugh. "I guess, I am."

The time we spend in the restaurant was wonderful. I didnt expect us to connect this way, its like he just gets me. We ate a huge meal, in the end we almost forget to pay and I feel myself being so entchanted to him.

Even though the waitress tried to flirt with him (which by the way is rude, because what about girls support girls?), he kept his attention on me, also reaching out infront of her and taking my hand. I really couldnt tell myself to stop imagining, what it would be like, if we were a couple.

I mean, its ridiculous, because he made it very clear, that he didnt want to be in a relationship. But still, a girl could dream, right? Right.

After we did pay (much to the relief of the waitress), we went outside and walked a few minutes along a path, our hands entangled by the time we got back to the car. I didnt want to admit it, but he managed to make me fall in love with him in one day.

And even though I was scared, he made me feel alive. I couldnt concentrate on anything over than him, his sweet compliments, his eyes that kept looking at my lips, his arm that went around my shoulder to keep me warm.

He was so caring, it made me loose my mind. I didnt want the night to end. So when we were back in his car on the way home and he asked me, if I wanted to see his new car, I agreed.

We talked on the way back about our interests. He told me about his passion for football, even though he didnt get to play anymore and about his fascination for restoring cars. I told him about my love for books and that I would rather spend the day waching a new Netflix series, than doing sports. We talked about our goals for the future and that we both want to get out of this town, finally seeing something new.

By the time we arrived at the ranch and he parked the car outside the door, it felt like I knew his past selve, his present and future self. I never had a date like this before, something so honest and great.

But I mean, I also never knew a person like Cole before, so maybe that is the reason.

☀️☀️☀️☀️

When we arrived, it was dark outside, but because it´s summer, neither one of us felt cold. "Is it okay for me to be here? I mean, are your parents cool with you, bringing a girl home?" I look to the house, checking if some of his family members are still awake, but no lights are seen. "As long as they dont know about it, they´re cool." He grins at me and I shake my head.

"Come on, I want to show you what I´ve been working on for the last months." He leads me, one of his hands on my back to the garage, opening the door and letting me in. Its dark inside, but I hear him shifting around to find the switch to turn on the light. When I hear a click and the light flickers on, I look around and at the tools, all the stuff standing around and finally at the car.

He´s standing next to it, a proud smile on his face. "So, what do you think?" Im walking towards him, inspecting his work. "I mean, I dont have a clue about cars, but it looks really good and like it was restored by a proffesional." My fingers run over the open hood.

When he carefully closes it a few seconds later, I look up and see him watching me. "What?" I say, starring back. He takes a step towards me, searching in my gaze, trying to make out if I want this the same way, he wants to feel me. But as I stand still, waching him get closer, centimeter by centimeter, until our faces almost touch, I feel myself breathing heavily.

His hands sneak around my waist, pulling me gently closer to him. He turns around, so he leans onto the car, directing me, so I stand between his legs. I feel myself getting hot, I hear his breath and watch his eyes trailing down to my lips and finally to my eyes. I do the same. And before I know it, he leans in and catches my lips in a captivating way. I feel myself melt.

One of my arms sneak around his shoulders, so I get closer to him. I feel butterflies fly around in my stomach, smiling in the kiss and when he breaks apart, he looks at me.

"Hate me less now?" He wispers.

"Not really, try again."

So he does. Our lips meet, our breath gets taken and I feel my knees weaken, when one of his hands capture my face. He holds me still and I feel every touch, my skin burns.

The temparature rises and when one of his hands travel down, first to my neck, then to my collarbone and lastly to my shoulders, his fingers hold the straps of my dress. Again, he breaks apart, so I open my eyes and immedialy want to kiss him again. Although my hands wander over his shoulder, Im not sure what to do now.

"Are you nervous?" His hands caress my sides, his question leaves me uncertain. I nod, not in the right state to use my words. At that, he gently smiles. "Then I will help you relax. You can do that for me right?"

His words make me clench my thights and I feel myself getting wet. When I nod again, he leans forward and wispers in my ear. "Good girl." That and that his lips nip at my ear and leave a wet trail at my neck, makes me whimper slightly. I feel him smirk, so he earns a light smack on his arm. He laughs quietly and when I open my eyes, his ones are shining with a hidding mischief.

"You enjoy this too much." I say it as a joke, but he takes it seriously. "I do, actually. I dreamt about you making these sounds a lot more often, than I would like to admit."

At that, I gasps. "You what?" I try to concentrate on his words, but his wandering hands dont help with that. He kisses me, but now he turns us around and presses me against the car. Helping me sit on it, so he can get between my legs.

"I said" he beginns to speak and his lips find a certain spot, that makes me moan. "I want to hear all the little sounds, that escape you." My hands wander to his hair, holding it and messing with it. His hands again find the straps of my dress and when I kiss him more passionate, he slowly beginns to pull it down. First the right side until he lets go of it, so he can pull the other one down. All that, while still kissing me.

I feel myself getting lost in him, his lips are like a drug and I feel myself getting addicted. When I feel the air hitting my skin, I break apart. He looks at me, checking if I’m still okay with what we´re doing. "What do you want to do?" he holds the straps of my dress, gesturing that he wants to get me out of it. I breath, trying to know, what I want.

I come to the simple conclusion, that I do want him. Even if its just for now. So I kiss him and try to strip him out his jacket. To do that, he lets go of my dress and it falls to the floor, leaving me in my underwear. His eyes scan my body as his hands caress my skin, his finger going from my shoulders to my breasts.

Breathing heavily I look at him. "Your turn." His hands leave my body and with a teasing smile he takes off his jacket, leaving me starring at his muscles.

One of his fingers turn my head to look at him. "You like what you see?" His grin says it all. My hands find their way to touch his arms, going further down until i tuck at his shirt.

"I would like you more without it." His eyes turn dark. Swiftly he strips off his tanktop, leaving us both starring at each other. Before I can do something else, his arms direct me to him.

"You´re having second thoughts about this, sunshine?" He´s touching my necklace.

"Have you?" I look at him, seeing him smile.

"Never." His hands go to my legs, so he can lift me up and my legs hold on to his hip. I lean towards him, kissing his neck and stopping by his ear.

"What do you want to do to me?" At that, he stands up, still holding me, while opening the door of his restored car and lays me gently on the back seats. He´s hovering over me, a look in his eyes that makes me shiver. When he leans down and presses a kiss on my chest, near my neck, I try to focus on my breathing.

"I want to do so many things to you." His hands tangle in my hair, lightly tugging on it while he leans down, his lips ghost over my own.

"I want to-" his voice goes quiet, I feel his hands touching my legs, breaking them apart, so he can sit between them. "-take of your panties first. Alright?" I nod, looking up to him. Slowly his fingers find my underwear, so he can slide them down and I get out of it.

When he holds them in his hands, he puts it in his pocket, because he still wears his jeans. He starts to kiss me, leaving my mind with a relaxed feeling, going further down, kissing my chest and my stomach, eventually leaving a kiss above the one spot, thats been dying to be touched.

"I already have you this wet, how sweet of you." When his hand comes down and touches me, sliding one finger gently over my folds, I try to hold myself together.

"You dont need to be quiet. Nobody can hear you." But when I keep holding in my moans, he takes it as a personal challenge. As he leaves kisses all over my body, his finger carefully begin to speed up and I feel my walls clenching.

"God, you´re so tight. How long havent you been touched?" His mouth his hot on my skin and when he adds a second finger, I moan loudly. My eyes squeeze shut at the feeling that consumes me, I cant concentrate on a word he says.

"Already too turned on to answer me, huh? Thats a shame, because Im curious to know the answer of my question." He stops the movements of his fingers, leaving me with a needy feeling. And when I try to move, he stills my hips.

"As much as I like to see you sqirm, I want you to answer me. Can you do that for me?" I try to remember his question. "I-I havent." He rises his eyebrows in confusion. "You what?" His fingers leave my body. When I open my eyes, I realise what he has been asking me.

"I-I havent been touched like that before." His mouth opens in disbelief. "You never had a boyfriend or someone you´ve been intimitated with?" I look at the ceiling of his car. "I mean, not really. I´ve dated someone once, but we didnt reach a level, where we got to this point. So, I never did something like this." I can see the conflict in his eyes. "You´re sure, you want me to be your first?" Its sweet, that he cares.

"I- I guess so, Im sure it wont be a bad experience with you." He quietly laughs. "I hope so, but I cant get my head around the fact, that this is your first time. I mean, youre beautiful and fun to be around." He´s silent for a moment. "You know, we dont have to go all the way, right? I wont be mad, if we stop here."

I think for a moment and while my hands trace his muscles, I try to sort out my thoughts. Now that his fingers are no longer distracting me, I try to understand my feelings.

"We should maybe take it slow? I do want to get to know you better, before-" I dont have to finish the sentence, he just nods and when he smiles at me, I feel myself relax.

"That´s okay, don´t worry. I can drive you home, if that is what you want?" My eyes are searching for a sign, that he is mad. But he just gently brushes my hair aside and kisses the side of my mouth.

„I like you. That means, so we are clear here, that I want you to want me. And if thats the case, which I hope so, then we dont need to rush anything. If the time is right, who knows what will happen. Even if that means, I need to beg you to go out with me again.“

I raise my eyebrows, laughing at his words.

„You would do that?“ He shrugs, smiling at me.

„For you, I would.“

[minnielvr]

future reference - hwang hyunjin

˚ ༘ pairing bf! hyunjin x fem reader

˚ ༘ genre hurt/comfort, angst, fluff

˚ ༘ wc 826

˚ ༘ warnings angst, reader is insecure

˚ ༘ note this shit was hella self indulgent!!

you had just gotten back home after yet another bad day and all you could do was look in the mirror, judging each part of your body. your brain pointing out all of your flaws. the acne on your skin, the frizzy, unbrushed hair sitting atop your head, and so many other things you just hated about yourself.

why does he even love you? what does he see in you thats so special? your boyfriend, hwang hyunjin, was practically sculpted by the greek gods. he's tall, handsome, strong, and oh so sweet. he's everything a woman could ever want on this planet. but for some reason, he chose you. and you did not know why.

of course, you knew he loved you. he says it every day. and if thats not enough, he buys you the most expensive jewelry and the most lavish clothes. not to mention the dates he takes you on, fancy 5-star restaurants all the time. still, you couldn't help but think, why?

with all of the voices in your brain you hadn't heard the door open and close, or the voice of hyunjin telling you he's home. when he walked up to your guys shared bedroom and saw you staring at yourself, he knew what was happening.

"hey sweetie, everything okay?" he asked right by your ear as he snaked his arms around your waist.

"y-yea everythings fine." you tried to get out of his hold, but he didn't let you.

he led you over to the bed and laid you on the bed, then he slipped in next to you. he pulled the covers over you two and grabbed your waist and turned you towards him.

"whats going on in that pretty little head of yours hm?" he asked.

"hyunjin its nothing really. just some stupid stuff." you tried to dismiss the subject.

"hey nothing that you feel is stupid. your feelings are valid okay?" he reminded you. "so, what're you thinkin' about?" he asked once again.

"i just felt..weird today. i started to wonder why you love me." you admitted.

the look on his face was a mixture of shock and sadness, but most of all guilt. how could he let you think like that? now he was angry at himself. had he not been doing enough to show you his love?

you could sense that hyunjin was about to start beating himself up for it, so before he could talk you decided to explain yourself.

"im not saying you don't do enough because you definitely do! i appreciate it really and i love you so much for that. but i cant help but think why me hyunjin? theres so many other girls who're better looking than me and don't act like this. i mean, all the girls in the idol industry are better than me so, why?" you had word vomit, you didn't mean to say that much, but it just came out. and now you could see tears in his eyes.

"y/n..i-i'm so sorry you feel this way. how did i never notice? god i'm such a bad boyfriend." he chuckled at himself while trying to wipe away the tears. and before you could say anything about how its not his fault he continued on.

"i want you because you're...y/n. you better than any girl out there. you're pretty and smart and super funny, but what i love most is that you have the biggest heart ever. more than any of girls in the idol industry. you're so kind to me y/n. you don't love me just for my looks or for my money, you love me for who i truly am. and thats the same reason i love you. you're perfect in my eyes." at this point there was several tears rolling down his cheeks, but neither of you cared.

"hyunjin..." you started at him sweetly and brought a hand to his cheek to wipe away the tears, ignoring your own. "god i love you so much," you chuckled, "what would i do without you?"

"no, what would i do without you, my y/n? my beautiful girl" he embraced you and held you close to his chest. "one day, im going to tell everyone in the world that you're the love of my life okay? im going to yell it out from the top of a building." he said.

you giggled. "one day, i want to be able to call you my husband." you looked up at him from his chest.

his eyes went wide, and so did his smile. "you mean that?"

"of course." you assured him.

"okay then, i know i dont have a ring or anything yet. but just for future reference, will you marry me?" he asked with a big grin.

"hyunjin!!!" you shoved your face back in his chest and laughed. then you looked back up at him.

"just for future reference, yes hyunjin, i will marry you."

[quitealotofsodapop]

Sun Wukong is such a cool character across the board since if you genderbent the character - very little would change other than the reactions of those around them.

LMK: Same character. Only difference is brief confusion from MK and Tang, who adjust their pronouns when speaking of Dawn accordingly. Relationship with Macaque unchanged.

Hero is Back: Short red hair, chewing on hay, tall af? Thats half the butch farmers in my county. Liuer has a brief moment of "The Great Sage is a woman?" before going straight back to fanboying about how cool Dasheng is. Zhu Bajie is likely shocked and appalled that he was defeated by a woman - tho still shoots his shot. Attract does not work on Dasheng. Story accidentally becomes a tale of a mother sacrificing her life to protect her son, and ends with the son sacrificing himself to protect his new mother.

Reborn: Still a chaotic hissing gremlin of a monkey. Brief moment of funny where the very feminine Taoist acolytes misgender Smokey as male since she still looks the same. Zhu Bajie hesistates to hit on Smokey (despite her very convincingly diguising herself as his wife during his recruitment), since she terrifies him. Smokey still arises from their false death cloaked in blue flame and lava. And still mourns the loss of Fruitie.

NewGods: Bigger plot twist of Ace's identity. No one has figured out her identity for so long (including Ao Guang) cus they all assumed SWK was a guy. Still a giggling, gambling lush. Yunxiang: "Hey whos this drunken, half-dressed old lady offerring to train me in exchange for a motorbike- oh sweet Buddha she's the Monkey King."

1999/2000 Cartoon: Sugar is already femme af. No change.

Netflix: Little character change, though Cherry's story would indirectly become a glass ceiling situation with the Immortals. Men can become immortal by killing lots of evil demons (source: Erlang & Hou Yi), but women gotta suffer (source: Guanyin). Bonus girl bonding with Lin.

Smash Legends: Starfruit leans into gender stereotypes for the views. Goes full tiktok e-girl with her asethetic. Would form punk girl band with Goldie.

And lets not forget how many live-action Sun Wukongs are played by women actors and/or stuntwomen.

Gender bending their Macaques also do not change much. Basically these monkeys could be any gender indentity and still be themselves

[thatflatenedfrogontheroad]

I made a tier list...

please make your own!! I need to see boomer nations opinions on our man!!!! I know the tiers are actually so vile so change them if you desire :)))

OK so my quick blurb on why they are their!! (working worst to best)

28. Identity Crisis #5 - HE WOULD KILL ME FOR THE FUN OF IT. It did bring about the most random rivalry between Tim drake’s fandom and boomer's which is very funny

27. Black Lantern - Oh no… he's back… like a boomerang. Ate his own son... RIP…. L skill issue

26. Sliver Age - Would actually call me a slur and say that I don't deserve rights. He would hate crime me and then solicit me for sex. He looks like he's wearing a dress… what a pretty lady.

25. Flash TV Show - EWWWWWWWW, he though he ate...

24. DC Online - He looks like he would punch me in face at a NYC bus stop

23. White Lantern - Don't look at me like that… stop. He's back from the dead like a boomerang?? Something about most of the New 52 boomerangs don't hit the same. the bride all in white :’)

22. Young Justice - Gave me the ick. You might be thinking... he looks identical to SS hell to pay, why is he down here?? Great question… HE WAS SO CREEPY TO ONE OF THE GIRLS IN YOUNG JUSTICE….. WHO IS A MINOR!

21. Injustice Movie - Just because your in the background… doesn't save you from this list!!!

20. New 52 - Ok he's kinda hot if you look through your peripherals…Why are you wearing skinny jeans… you millennial

19. Harley Quinn TV Show - He's fine… just fine. “We’ll stack out bingo… Boomer loves an older woman” NO HE MUST LOVE ME! I AM VERY VERY MATURE FOR MY AGE

18. Flash: Sins of the Father - Can you please stop talking in the 3rd person… you are starting to sound crazy.

17. Most Wanted - I know jack shit about him. That's probably because he is barely in a comic issues THATS NAMED AFTER HIM!

16. Flash Point Paradox - His fight scene actually ate. I'm a sucker for Boomer being with the Rogues. If cyborg can take his belt off… so can I

15. Suicide Squad 2021 - Wow they somehow gave him even less lines than his first movie. 1. He doesnt look like boomer. 2. His accent is so bad… and hes AUSTRALIAN 3. His acting low key kinda mid 4. They killed off two of the only OG suicide squad members they had on the cast 5. He dies in the first 20min and in the most disrespectful way

14. Suicide Squad 2016 - The only good thing to come from this man is the fanfiction he brought. THIS FUCKING MOVIE MADE HIM A CANON BRONY WHICH I CAN NOT FORGIVE. GET THIS OUT OF MY SMUT BEFORE FREAK THE FUCK OUT >:( Fuck him and pinky too, you son of a bitch!!!! (its not that serious lol... i just want him to stop fucking a toy horse... please guys)

13. This Goober Alien Guy - I know nothing. He just kinda showed up… and I'm not mad just a little confused. He looks like he needs a hot chocolate and a hug :)))) 

12. Lego Batman Movie - Low key an icon. What I would do to get my hands on one of these sets… I would come close to killing someone for it

11. DC Lego Super Villains - If he wasn't Lego I would propose (Shane Dawson style) Once again what I would do for the very discontinued Lego set tie in…

10. Batman: Brave and The Bold - Those cheekbones could cut someone. Why are you wear a mini skirt… take it off ;)

9. Suicide Squad (comic) - Yes I know he was drinking and driving but he's not real so it doesn't count!!! The beginning of the Boomer Mobile! THE GAP TOOTH DUDE!

8. Justice League Unlimited S1 - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ok the hairline is… bad…. But so is mine twin!! I LOVE THAT THEY GAVE HIM PROPER CLOTHES AND NOT RAGS DUDE

7. Agent of Oz - is this picture is my school profile pic...yes… and??HE'S COVERED IN BLOOD AND IM GIGGLING!!!!!!!!!!!

6. Stjepan Sejic's Boomer - Choke hold and choke me...  I want to hear his voice but he can't break his mewing streak…The ungodly things I would let him do to me

5. Dark: Apocalypse War - Constantine! Boomer! GIRLS! GIRLS!! ILL SLEEP WITH BOTH OF YOU!!! I was not expecting him in this movie so I started to freak out when he showed up DUDE. PLEASE LET ME SIT ON IT

4. Suicide Squad: Hell to Pay - I'm a ride he wouldn't survive… I DONT HAVE WORDS TO DECRIBE HOW I FEEL DUDE… I WOULD DO ANYTHING HE ASKED FOR NO JOKE. Dead on the floor

3. Justice League Unlimited S2 - The glow up in REAL... had me on my hands and knees as a 3rd grader… and still on my knees today. I have never wanted someone to fuck me in the back alleyway of a shit bar so bad in my life

2. Batman: Assault on Arkham - The one that started it all… he is the reason I am this way. no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom BUT GREG ELLIS IS PUBLIC ENIME NUMDER ONE. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!!!!

AND THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!! WE ALL SAW IT COMING

1. Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League - I AM GNAWING ON THE IRON BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE!!!!!! He has it all, the face, the VOICE, the look, the character!!!!! It is hands down the most consistently good representation of captain boomerang out their… and its canon that's he has a big dick :D I would sell my first born to get one night…

Thank you all for reading this word vom, I am sick in the head <3

if any of the comic issues are off or something please let me know :)

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make your our and tag me!! i need to see them <3<3<3

[luxthestrange]

RoR Incorrect quotes#149 BROAD BALDY

You & Loki going to Male Deity Pep talks about how to get females...how to be a womanizer...it was really a "Wanna humiliate a Man?-YEAH!!!"

Zeus*Looking at the Rows of males*-Say the meanest thing you can think of me, Anybody

Y/n*Leaning against Loki, arm around his waist*...Forehead

Zeus*Looking visually confused*...Sorry?...What does that even mean?

Loki*Leaning unto you as well with a smile, nuzzling into your shoulder, Shrugs*Forehead~

Zeus*Swtiching from leg to another, scoffing*..Ok...sure it's just funny because I dont like...have a weird forehead-

Y/n*Snickers and nods at him*Heh-heh!-Just keep talking BALDY~

Zeus: Im NOT bald im actually regular alright-Listen when you approach a lady what you want to do is you want to take AN ALPHA body stance!BROAD SHOULDERS!*Puffing his chest and shoulders to show them*

Y/n*is letting Loki retouch lipstick and mockingly does a hand gesture to their own forehead*BROOOAD FOREHEAD

Zeus: Dude-DUDE im fine if you and he stays just don't interrupt me, please

Loki*Kisses your lips before the lipstick dries just to get the same shade,side-eyes at the Zeus*No no~We might~We Might~

Zeus: Ok look, no matter what a lady throws at you...*smiles at the crowd* and they can say some pretty random stuff, Just roll with it-I'll show you! I need a volunteer!

A deity in front of You and Loki get up just as you did

Zeus: Oh no I think you stood up first*Looking at the deity in front of you*

Y/n*Touching his shoulders with a malicious grin*Ey bro if you cool with it you know what im saying. You don't mind~*Is slowly making the demon sit down back*-If I do this right?~

Deity*Nods abit nervously*Uh-...Yeah yeah

Y/n*Smirks patting his back and walking up to the stage*Yeaaah Dexter's lab is cool with it~Go ahead baldy*gets on the stage next to Zeus*

Zeus*Scoff rolling eyes...but clearly getting self-conscious*Not bald-Alright im going to do what I call a basic opening line*Coughs and smirks at you with deeper voice*Hey goddess~ What's your name?~

Y/n*Hums and nods looking at him*You a bitch

Zeus*Looking offended*HEY-

Loki*In his chair clapping at you*THATS MY HUMAN~

[thecynthh]

smart ass - M.S

synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to him him

notes - college setting, no smut yet, more of matt in the next part, hopefully a long series !

author notes - heyyyyy so this is my first series i guess, i hope you guys like this and i promise not to take too long with the next part. love all u babes and j hope u have a nice new years if you celebrate it!

——————————————————————————

——————————————————————————

a notification appears on my laptop, new grade from Ms.Garcia. shrugs and groans rung throughout the lecture hall, clicking on the notification a website pops up onto my desktop.

*97%,A+ good job y/n keep up the good work*

what were people so upset about, i thought to myself. my shoulder gets tapped by the person beside me.

“oh my god this old woman just hates me,” madi cries from beside me. i peak over at madi’s screen seeing a whopping 54%. i dont understand how that happens to a girl like madi, she was so smart and didn’t deserve that grade. i knew she didnt deserve that, i read her essay myself !

my hand lands on hers, “ okay that’s actually insane for you to be getting a 54, your essay was so good?!?”

everyone's head shoots up to the women below the many rows of seats, “so as you see at your grades only ms y/n got a good grade. i'm willing to let everyone else rewrite their exam and hand it in by next week if you do not like your grade.” the decrepit woman just packs her bag after saying that and begins to leave the room. everyone replicated her and began to pack up their belongings, including me.

madi and i leave the large space and stand in the hall just outside. “oh fuck, i promised nick id meet him after our class, ill see you later babes.” she ghosts a kiss on my cheek as i do the same to her greeting her goodbye. i grab my phone to check the time but to mostly look busy before i head somewhere else.

large footsteps creep up behind me and i hear my name being called. “y/n? thats your name right?” a man around 5’8 is standing in front of me. a little startled i take a second to reply.

“uhm yes that's me” i say replying to him. i notice his outfit, simple black cargos with a baggy sweater over it saying RANSOM with angel wings projecting off of the word.

“s-so i was wondering if you were willing to help me with the essay, you know, maybe study the material more?” he says while slightly looking down and looking very nervous.

“oh yea! of course i’ll bring over my notes and materials that i got from Ms.Garcia. does friday work for you? i have work tomorrow so i’ll be busy after class…” i cringe at my own sentence.

i knew who matt was, he was quite the popular guy and a social media influencer who made a lot of money. he didn’t have to exactly work a normal job like i did. although i don’t blame him, i’ve watched some of their videos and if i’m being honest they are pretty funny. i’ve slowly started to keep up with them ever since i was introduced to them by madi at an influencer party where she and the triplets got invited.

“mhm friday works, you can swing by my house, my brothers won’t be home that night. thanks for this by the way.” he says with his face softening, he definitely seemed more relaxed after i said yes.

“okay then! it’s a date- oh well not really a date, but i mean date as in like… oh you get it.” i trip over my words and finally take in his features. he has a beautiful jawline and scruffy that would feel so good on my-

he chuckles at my mishap “yeah it’s a date just lemme give you my number i’ll text you the address soon.” i present my phone to him as he begins to type out his phone number into his phone, naming his self matt s with a panda emoji next to it.

he’s still typing a little after he names himself, thinking nothing of it i just let him place my phone back into my hand at him as i wave to him bidding him goodbye.

i let my shoulders relax after i see him turn a corner and is out of my line of sight. god why am i so bad at talking to guys, that was straight embarrassing, i thought to myself.

——————

thursday afternoon

madi and i met for coffee after our classes were finished, we caught up ate some small pastries and drank coffee, the usual. but once i told her about what happened yesterday….

“YOU WHAT??” madi says, nearly snorting out her coffee from her nose.

“i agreed to help tutor matt so he can pass this class” i repeat to her seeing zero problem with this.

“so you wanna tutor him, at his house, without his brothers home, at night.” madi tells me in a “matter of fact” tone

“well if you say it like that it sounds like i’m dancing with the devil over here.” i say sarcastically still not seeing the problem.

“you. matt. alone. even after what happened at the party?” madi retorts bringing up the party again.

“okay i still have no fucking clue what you mean by matt was eyefucking me at that party, i was enjoying myself and he was more or less just observing everyone at the party.” god just hearing myself make me realize what is happening.

“you know, just good luck and please don’t be so naive, i don’t want you to get hurt.” madi says in such a sincere tone.

“i’m glad you are at least okay with the whole idea of it, but i gotta go, i have a shift in an hour.” i tell her collecting my things, she stands up and ghosts a kiss on my cheak.

“kk love ya girl, i’ll see you tomorrow.” madi says waving me off before i become late for my shift.

let’s just hope she has at least a little bit of faith in me.

authors note - YAYAYAYAYAY IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS !!!

[bbgliker-teehee]

i genuinely hate how the only plus size/ fat rep in both shows is given to either BG characters viv wasn't involved in or just the "evil guys". you cannot tell me that woman has any respect for plus sized people at all.. she enforces harmful stereotypes and outright refuses to add ANY diversity to her characters (the "i'm afraid to draw muscles" bs for example)

• literally how can you make the embodiment of gluttony not at least a little bit chubby?? she literally can summon all types of foods & drinks?? thats her entire thing?? she is built like a kardashian.. how. if you're gonna depict the main two fat ppl in your shows as food addicted a-holes why not stay consistent (impossible for her)

•both main fat characters (adam, mammon) are always seen eating unhealthy stuff in masses. a very harmful stereotype. and also adding to the stigma plus sized ppl face on a daily basis.

•not to mention the constant fat "jokes" directed at moxxie, which are a) unnecessary and b) blatantly wrong?? moxxie isn't even fat?? and even then its always implied fat people are fat because they can't stop eating or only eat junk food, like blitz telling moxxie to eat a salad. or loona.

• husk. that man literally consumes alcohol like it's water and he doesn't have an alcohol belly??? hello??? thats...not avoidable when you're an alcoholic... SAME FOR VEROSIKA.

•the mammon & fizz bs. a fat character telling an already skinny person they're "chungo?" and he should lose weight cause people find it sexy af? and its outright implied its bad behavior? she's just immensly hypocritical with this. loona & blitz said similar things towards moxxie but there it's funny & acceptable? f off.

•mimzy is the only fat character that she designed that is close to the HH main cast and she's also portrayed as a shitty person. every fat character is a shitty person and called out for it.(adam with charlie, mammon with fizz, and mimzie with alastor) everyone else literally looks the same and is equally shitty as a person but is never called out because its her blorbos.

but we're talking about the woman who turned st. peter into a blue eyes, blone haired anime twink and refuses to draw BIPOC- or any diversity for that matter....

Adam and Mammon are so similar that Vivianne might as well make them the same character...

And Mimzy my love....they did you dirty

[sinning-23]

Unbecoming (Sanji x Ex!Reader)

Angst and hurt and no comfort lol so I hope you prepared yourself lol. I don't usually write engst but I love drama and tension and all that good shit. SOOO ENJOY!

Warnings: Swearing but thats it

Nami can see the look of rage and jealousy written over your face. This wasn't the first time Sanji had done something like this. Blatantly flirted with other women as if you weren't right there.

Part of you dismissed it, knowing that's just how he was as a person. Flirty and charming. But damn it if it didn't piss you off. On this particular night, he had gone too far.

"You know you guys broke up y/n. Let it go."She hums, trying to keep you from going ballistic. It wasn't working.

You sip your drink with narrowed eyes, the bottle being clenched tighter in your hand now. In front of you was Sanji, standing at the bar, talking to some tramp who swooned every time he gave a smile that you deemed to be just for you. He leans down by her ear, whispering something that makes her physically shiver. It makes you sick. Because you know that once upon a time you were that 'tramp' falling for that same smile.

"Oh okay." You hum, standing from your spot and walking to the pair.

Sanji looks up, smile fading at your displeased expression. He's quick to clear his throat as the girl he was previously romancing looks behind her, your now emptied bottle held high over your head. Before it could even make contact with the flinching woman, Sanji grabs your wrist and lowers it, shaking his head no. Profanities of all kinds slip from your lips as the girl before you stands as if she wants to fight. Not like she'd win, you'd kick her ass easily.

"So you don't wanna introduce me to your new friend?" You scoff, seeing him roll his eyes.

The funny thing about this whole situation was that...

You and Sanji weren't together anymore for this exact same reason. He was too much of a goddamned flirt. And you were far too possessive, jealous...and violent when provoked. He's dragging you away now, your body slung over his shoulder as he scowls at Nami for not holding you back. She can see you kicking your legs and pounding your fists into his back. But, Nami simply shrugs with a "This isn't my fight."

It's not long before you're set down, Sanji rolling his eyes at your behavior.

"What's your problem?' he scoffs, throwing his hands up as if he did nothing wrong. The argument was already rising off your tongue and past your lips.

That's another reason why your two broke it off. You argued way too much. Nothing was agreeable and everything was a problem. It was toxic and you both knew it... However, one of you was more eager to leave than the other.

"I don't have a fucking prob-"

"But you do. What don't you understand Y/n? We are not together anymore!" He cuts you off shaking his head in disbelief.

It's true but it still hurts your feelings. You drop your fists, swallowing back the sob that rises in your throat, and blink away the stinging in your eyes. You know you were fucked up but you couldn't help it. Love like that was all you'd ever known.

You were supposed to be possessive and jealous and bitchy and...he was supposed to make you soft and feel soft...This was his fault...no it wasn't, but again this was just like you to try and find someone else to blame.

"I-I know." You rasp, looking away from him. There's no love there anymore. Just irritation and mild pity.

"It's unbecoming of you to act like this. You know that already though." He states, leaving you outside the bar with your thoughts.

Your prince was gone.

[jei-rifni]

Whats this? I finally gave in and made a Destiny 2 DBH au? Yeah. I did. (Ima call it D2+DBH for short)

Bits of the designs (mostly Connor) are inspired by @ygreczed-3 ‘s TRGATSA au which I think is super cool (big fan of magic stuffs) thank you again for letting me use your design as inspo!

ANYWAY the idea is that everything is the same except the fact that Exos look like Androids. Exos creation by the darkness and Bray’s nonsense is still part of it (considering making Kamski as Bray, but i haven’t fully thought of it since who would be Elizabeth and all that yknow) so this au isnt very planned out yet, it was just mostly because I wanted to make Connor and Nines into some warlocks (I WILL MAKE MARKUS AND KARA AND THE WHOLE SHABANG LATER) so yeah the way Exos work in this is instead of just how fully and properly is in Destiny, Exos in this au work the same way as original, but they all have specific models instead of the different variety like in the game. So there would be lots of people who look the exact same because they are Exos, of course hair colour and eyes and such are different but overall theyre the same. So, say Kara right? AX400, thats one of the models, and thats what she looks like. Theres alot of other people who look like her, just like how in original DBH theres alot of her model. And the D2+DBH au Exo models, unlike the proper Destiny 2 Exos, were built with specific purposes, and Bray (Kamski..?) selected the person right before turning them into an Exo to see what model they’d fit best

Example, Kara was a simple woman who didnt come from a good family, so she left it to volunteer for Bray’s Exo experiment. Bray saw that she was nothing but a simple woman, and made her the average AX400 model. Simple. Just like her

Connor and Nines were friends when they both decided to volunteer for Bray’s experiment. They went by different names at the time, but neither of them in the present can remember anything. (Connor as a human being name Bryan would be kinda funny, and Nines would be Richard when he was human) Connor and Nines were part of the RK line, Bray made them specifically for helping humans with “detective” work and such so their pre-programmed minds are more intricate and aware, but with the Vex invasion at Bray’s Exoscience facility, they had to fight alongside Myrmidon’s, Trojan’s, TR400’s, TW400’s and WB400’s and a bunch of others as extra support. Hence why their numbers are 51 and 87. Thats alot of times to be reset. They remember nothing of their friendship. Or even eachothers existence. And when Connor woke up (previously 50, now awaken as 51) he was a guardian. Later on Nines will follow up and join the guardian crew (little funnies, Nine actually woke up as a guardian on his 86th reset, but he messed with some Fallen by accident and they learned to reset him, making him new again just as he was beginning to learn the light properly. His Ghost was not happy about it) Connor and Nines meet at the Tower and because theres not many RK models walking around (especially since most of them died during the multiple wars and their bodies were used up during the Vex attack at Bray’s facility) they easily noticed eachother like “oh my god, another me model, that’s something you dont see everyday” and it seemed they clicked easily like old friends. (I wonder why hmmmm)

Thats all I got for now. To the folks that know nothing of Destiny, or know nothing of Detroit Become Human, feel free to ask me. I know all i said probably sounded like nonsense to the other if you didnt know what even one side of the content was. Have a good day

I hope to be able to explain this better in the future, because this probably was frustrating for you to read with my bad explanation :(

[bi-hop]

coming back to the kabru is like jesus if he was judas comparison. I think it's interesting that kabru always knew that he couldn't be the one to conquer the dungeon so he wanted to find people who could and support them, because he knows he's an excellent judge of character.

but the thing is, he still wants to be the hero. he still has a saviour complex. he's still envious that laios of all people is the one who has the potential to beat the mage. i think he wanted to be the one™ in some way . he *needed* to be needed by laios, he wanted to be like hermes, a psychopomp, or maybe charon, the ferryman that guides laios. so when laios /ignored/ him (not laios' fault truly he just . bad timing. sorry kabru) he felt resentful and yet even more determined to get in laios' orbit, to be the light. to be important in his eyes, like, judas when he said to the woman who used expensive oil to clean jesus ' feet. he said "why not just give it to the poor?" because he wanted praise. he wanted his teacher to look at him and go "look, i listened to you! i know what you teach!"

thats why laios rubbed off on him and he used a nutrition metaphor even because hes like. he wants to be jesus (the one to sacrifice himself and save the world from the dungeons to prevent another utaya) but hes judas (the adversary. the supporter from the shadows. the one who shows the soldiers (canaries) who jesus is. the one who " reported " him in the first place)

anyway yeah I think he has. a Jesus complex and when he met Laios he got mad with envy because he realized he was Judas help me

this is so good, turning it over in my head.

an element of kabru's character that grabbed me early on and is reinforced as he begins to bet on laios is his preoccupation with morality. people complain about the murder (bc people are lame BUT I DIGRESS!) but don't typically focus on the justifications he gives. even without knowing about the demon's nature, he is able to understand that greed and violence will only beget more of the same as those who can adapt will turn worse and those who cannot will be exploited or flee. for him, it's like ripping out weeds from a garden to protect what he cherishes.

I agree that he feels very self-critical when he finally admits that he can't be the knight in shining armor that he wants to be, due to his inability to survive as long as he wants in the dungeon. even without the motivation of going back to save falin, laios and his party had already went further on a regular basis than he has.

(shake me if I'm remembering wrong, but when we first meet kabru's party, isn't it one of their first times ever successfully making it to the third floor? lmao.)

and so the point to me was always that, yes, kabru wants to be the guy and yes, his party supports him as the guy, but realistically? he'd need someone else to at the very least support him. but he's very practical so it made immediate sense to me that he'd start looking for someone who he can either trust to take on the role or who is capable enough to get to a point where kabru could then take over. (again, all pre-finding out what being a dungeon lord truly means)

despite the latter being an option though, kabru's preoccupation with morality still stands. if he was truly the cold rational being some people seem to see him as, it would have been simple to simply throw his lot in with the first strong yet horrible person he observed. but he's picky selective. even with laios as his choice, he's CONSTANTLY fighting The Demons about it. his nightmare alone makes it clear that he has extremely well-rooted doubts and fears about what laios might do.

^ funniest page ever to me btw

but despite that, he still continually does the work of supporting him, albeit with a lot of setbacks and complications OADSJDODSOJD

i don't necessarily think the lens that we're currently taking is what ryoko intended but to conclude it is funny the themes of betrayal because technically kabru does betray laios' trust once lycion's like "ayo, he hates monster food btw, he's a SNAKE" and then he fumbles his way into... sort of regaining it? kinda? of course, by post-canon, he has it fully back, but speaking exclusively of the main story here.