#hey come on

[sashannarcy]

THE CATGIRL IS BISEXUAL TOO????????

[aropride]

i think weight loss ads should be illegal and im not kidding

[married-2-the-music]

SHINHWA Deep Dive #4/4: When Do We Hold Someone Accountable?

TW: mention and discussion of cultural appropriation, racism, and the n-word. Deeper discussion in a separate post.

SHINHWA was formed in 1998 and is currently the longest running k-pop group in history, breaking the so-called 7-year curse three (and a half) times over. They have six members: Eric, Minwoo, Dongwan, Hyesung, Junjin, and Andy, who have been together since the beginning, and are one of the most formative groups of k-pop’s 1st generation.

Here are my credentials: uh…none? I can name about three SHINHWA songs off of the top of my head, which is slightly embarrassing. I know of course about their incredible legacy, but similarly to BTS, I’ve been a k-pop fan for half a decade now so I figured it’s time to get to know such an important group better. 

[mellosghosts]

hes a little confused, but hes got the spirit 🫡

[speckled-jim]

s3 armand tryna sneak

[bixels]

“America has no culture” is an inherently racist statement. Especially when talking about California, which has enormous populations (yes, plural) of Hispanic and Asian immigrants.

It’s such a self report that you see the American hegemony, the American monolith, as a singularly white entity that’s worthy of scorn. I want that person to look at the Black American NYC Miku design and tell me with their full chest that that isn’t culture. Especially when modern pop culture owes so much to Black American culture — hip hop, language, streetwear and fashion, pop music, jazz — as is actively erasing their roots, saying all of America has no culture is a dumbass statement.

Also, “all the US Mikus are dressed in generic casual street style for coolish weather.” The original Brazilian Miku is wearing sunglasses, a crop top, short shorts, a bikini, and flip flops you absolute dunce. If you’re gonna be rude at least be consistent.

[pathetic-gamer]

(this is basically the gist of his voicelines, right?)

[rslgatekeeper]

[deepdwellingsteamboat]

ABZÛ (2016) ◈ 1 / ∞

[shotmrmiller]

pornstar johnny got in the business because he likes sex. he's got a degree collecting dust in his closet that he could use but why would he when he finds himself in between a pair of legs every other day? heaven.

also he became a certified munch because he was tired of seeing pornstars (not amateurs, like legit contracted individuals) eat pussy like they hate it. if he had to wank to one more girl letting out manufactured noises, his cock would perma soften.

(bonus for him cuz he's got a pretty face. getting in and rising to the pinnacle was as easy as making the top AV model clench and quiver around his fingers. in an interview he once mentioned liking to flatten his tongue when his costar is at the precipice cuz he loves to feel them pulse. something about it almost having a heartbeat of his own. sickening man. he said it while apple cheeked and a wolfish grin.)

[skyburger]

do they celebrate pride month on teo

[inkskinned]

so while i was writing the book, i became violently suicidal.

this was mostly due to the fact that i had a very bad reaction to some meds and my brain stopped producing any serotonin. also i was in the last semester of grad school where it's actually illegal to feel anything but dread. so it wasn't going well.

somewhere in the fog of it i became aware i needed help. nobody was taking clients or my insurance. i didn't want to do inpatient care - it wasn't right for my needs. there's not really an "in between" stage between "inpatient" and "no care," but i was trying to do the right thing. i was trying to activate the chain of command that was my emergency plan. i knew i needed help now.

i used betterhelp.

i know, i know. i'm a straight-A student and so smart and so clever, how could i ever use something so blatantly bad. to be honest with you, i didn't feel particularly keen on it from the getgo - things that seem too good to be true usually are. also, if something online is free, the price is usually your privacy.

the thing is that there was kind of a global pandemic happening at the time and i worked 5 jobs alongside of being a fulltime student and also like writing a book on the side. it is a miracle that i even thought about getting help. i would love to tell you i had the mental wherewithal to like, process whether this was the right choice for me. mostly i was desperate. i was so suicidal that i was trying to find a reason to stay inside of fortune cookies. i was the kind of suicidal that looks like splatterpaint. i hadn't been that bad in an entire decade.

they took my data. i gave them it freely. somewhere out there, they have a dossier on me. on everything i survived. my story in little datapoints, scattergraphed beautifully.

the first woman told me that really i should be grateful, because (and this is a direct quote): "at least you're not anne frank." i said that i felt that statement was antisemitic, as anne frank's life and experience shouldn't be compared to like, a nonbinary lesbian in western massachusetts. the therapist said that i should try to use lucid dreaming to try to picture myself in an actually scary situation, like running from nazis.

i applied for another therapist. i was willing to accept the possibility that there was a bad apple in the bunch. the next therapist and i even laughed about how inappropriate that statement was. and then, in our next session: the new therapist said if i was struggling with body image issues, i should just work harder on my appearance. she spent 3 sessions in a row talking about how she was grieving, and made me memorize facts about her grandmother so "she can live on through my clients."

i am a three's-a-charm kind of person. okay, so what if the last person made me uncomfortable. i figured it was just a misunderstanding of priorities - she had felt she was sharing with me, i had felt like i had to take care of her. i applied for another therapist.

the last woman asked me to help her pray. she bowed her head. i stared at her, frozen, while she said: lord, i beg you: cure her. take the pain of being gay away from her.

i spent somewhere between 2.5 and 3 months on betterhelp. in that whole time, i was not getting the professional help i so desperately needed, even though i was fucking trying.

in the end, i survived this because i finally could get off the meds that were literally killing me. a request for a real therapist finally went through. i survived because my friends saved my life. because nick let me sob myself dry in his arms. because maddie took the razors out of my room when i asked them to. because grace slept over in my bed for like 3 weeks in a row since nobody trusted me not to hurt myself when i was alone. i survived because i got fucking lucky. because even when i was desperately suicidal, i was too old and too self-aware to take "you need to be prettier" as good advice.

the thing is that there's a 19 year old me who isn't like that. who would have heard "just think about how grateful you should be" and said - oh, i see. i would have assumed that is what it means to be in therapy: the same thing my abusers used to tell me. that i am just pretending and lazy. that i am ugly and unworthy.

betterhelp positioned itself to take advantage of an incredibly vulnerable community. it preys on desperation. it knows it is serving people who are not doing well mentally. it saw that there is a huge need for real, immediate, compassionate mental health care: and then it fucking takes your money and privacy.

i still get their ads on instagram. last night i watched as a woman in a pool pretends to talk to a different woman. they discuss her anxiety.

there's a 19 year old version of me, and she didn't survive this. she was too tired, and drowning. i almost fucking died. this thing almost fucking killed me.

in the ad, the woman playing the therapist takes a note on a clipboard and then nods once, sagely.

i have to admit it's a pretty scene. the steam and light coming off the pool water lands on the actresses. like this, it almost looks baptismal, holy.

[married-2-the-music]

SHINHWA Deep Dive #3/4: When Do We Hold Someone Accountable?

TW: mention and discussion of cultural appropriation, racism, and the n-word. Deeper discussion in a separate post.

SHINHWA was formed in 1998 and is currently the longest running k-pop group in history, breaking the so-called 7-year curse three (and a half) times over. They have six members: Eric, Minwoo, Dongwan, Hyesung, Junjin, and Andy, who have been together since the beginning, and are one of the most formative groups of k-pop’s 1st generation.

Here are my credentials: uh…none? I can name about three SHINHWA songs off of the top of my head, which is slightly embarrassing. I know of course about their incredible legacy, but similarly to BTS, I’ve been a k-pop fan for half a decade now so I figured it’s time to get to know such an important group better. 

[bribinart]

i took her (the cadaver) to my penthouse (my lab) then i freaked it (re-animated the corpse into a state of semi-consciousness)

(prints!)

[bet-on-me-13]

Trigons Backup Plan

So! Trigon knew from the moment his Daughter was taken in by the Monks of Azarath that it would be difficult to turn her to his will. He wasn't stupid, he knew just how hard it would be to make his daughter turn on everything she has ever known in her (very short) life.

He can't really blame her, even he believed that indiscriminate mass murder was wrong until his mid-200's, he just needs to wait for her to grow out of it.

But until then he still needs a way into the DC Universe. And if his daughter wouldn't help, then he could always just make a 2nd one.

So, he searches and eventually finds a Couple of Scientists who seem to be good targets. They are researching Magic and Ghosts, so he makes a Demonic Pact with them. He will give them the secrets needed to complete their Research, and in exchange all he asks is that they help him bare a child.

They agree, and Danny Fenton is born.

Danny was supposed to become a Hellmouth when he turned 16, unlocking his Demonic Powers and opening the way for Trigon to enter the DC Universe so he could conquer it.

Instead he managed to get himself killed at 14. Then he managed to come back to life as a Halfa, he got himself adopted by Clockwork, and he usurped the Throne of the Infinite Realms in the span of 1 year, therefore putting himself on the same level as his Father on the cosmic scale.

So there goes his Backup Plan.

Dammit.

...

Meanwhile Raven is panicking. She had been messing around with her Friends when they asked about the Spells she could do, and she off-handedly mentioned that she could cast Family Tracking Spells.

One thing led to another, and they all wanted to know if they had secret family. Then they asked if she wanted to try as well, and for some reason she agreed.

And long story short, she has a little brother somehow. A little brother who is only a few weeks away from turning 16, who doesn't know the Azarathian Spells she learned to prevent his own transformation into a Hellmouth.

Oh shit...

[arimabari]

Balor can I try rizzing you up please please please please please please-