#his entire family is batshit insane

[iprefertheterminsane]

Ive mentioned this on twitter but i feel the absolute need to reiterate how absolutely FUCKED the circumstances of Hob's immortality actually is.

It isnt a REWARD or PUNISHMENT for something he'd done. At no point was Hob ACTIVELY consulted about it. He was DRUNK, freshly returned from fighting a war for a king that let half his village (and likely his entire family) die from the Black Plague. Hob's immortality was the result of a wager between two entities of higher power than most Gods, he was the pawn of a GAME. Sure, Death had ulterior motives (wanting to give Dream a friend and for him to get out of the house.) But as far as Dream was aware this entire debacle was to see how long this measly peasant of a human could stand being alive before it drives him insane. In fact, the Centennial dates were so he could periodically check and WATCH.

Effectively, it was like if two people picked up some random grasshopper and dropped him into a mug of wine, watching to see how long he would stay alive with no lifeline. Humans arent DESIGNED to live that long.

AND YET. HOB DID.

For the most BATSHIT reason of....wanting to experience the mundanity and unfiltered joy of simple living. Do you understand how INSANE that is? And Dreamling as a concept is...my friend had explained it as; imagine defying God's will SO HARD HE FALLS IN LOVE WITH YOU. Imagine being SO UNHINGED in hope and optimism of Earthly Experiences an entity powerful than most Gods that HATE humans FALLS IN LOVE WITH YOU.

Like, FUCK. This ship drives me crazy. There is simply nobody out there like Robert "Hob" Gadling and there will be no other.

[verysium]

please write something about blue lock as cat dads, like we have cat and its batshit insane <3

my cat was furiously scratching at my bedroom door this morning, so i'm taking that as a sign to write this. here you go anon:

rin owns a void. black fur with bluish green eyes and sharp little fangs. rin adopted him as an emotional support animal after sae left for spain. his name is kuro (黑) which means "black" in japanese because the itoshis are just unoriginal with all pet names. sometimes the cat camouflages with the furniture, but rin knows its habits too well to accidentally sit on him. they have an almost telepathic bond. kuro follows a very strict routine. feeding times are 7 in the morning before rin's football practice and 6 in the evening during dinner. he is calm and quiet most of the time but hisses whenever there are birds in the window. very shy around strangers. will curl his tail around rin's leg and peek out from time to time but does not have the courage to actually approach. sometimes if rin has free time, he takes kuro out to the park and lets him chase after the butterflies. kuro is also very intelligent. knows how to unlock doors, fetch the newspaper, and clean up after using the potty. sometimes spaces out when rin watches his horror movies at night. will blink at the screen owlishly. he's not very skittish when it comes to jumpscares. he just doesn't understand what's going on in the film. his favorite time of the year is during the holidays when rin goes back to kamakura to visit his parents. mama itoshi always sneaks kuro an extra fish bone.

oliver has a cat with heterochromia. his name is björn which is swedish for bear because he is a massive maine coon. flirts with all the tabby cats in his neighborhood and purrs loudly to show off. incredibly fluffy but sheds a lot. very strong physically. one time he moved oliver's entire closet because he did not like how it was blocking his cat door. secretly the leader of a cat gang, but oliver doesn't know. pretty chill most of the time and enjoys large family gatherings. multilingual because he can respond to commands in swedish, japanese, and german. he also knows a little bit of danish. oliver taught him a few tricks as a kitten. he can twirl around, roll over, and give high-fives. despite his large size, björk is very flexible and light on his feet. one time he got into the cookie jar on the top pantry shelf, and oliver's mom had to shoo him out.

shidou has an orange cat named ryu (竜) which is an alternative form of the kanji for "dragon" (龍). it is also adapted from the first character in his name "ryusei." his cat looks exactly like how mcdonald's sprite tastes. very spicy. does not sleep at night. his business hours are from three in the morning to whenever he passes out. drifts like a literal race car and makes vrooming sound effects. ryu took one whiff of catnip as a kitten and has never been the same since. all of his toys are shredded. prefers taking the head off first. you will find cotton stuffing everywhere. he destroyed the brand new cat bed shidou got for him, so now he's been downgraded to a cardboard box. ryu is prohibited from all open windows especially the ones with pull-down blinds because he once saw a squirrel and went absolutely feral. only eats raw meat and refuses to even touch dried kibble. sits beside shidou whenever he orders yukhoe from the local korean restaurant. feasts on all the scraps.

barou has a tuxedo cat. her name is mimi, and she is the sweetest cat in existence. claws are always trimmed. licks herself clean. unusually calm at the vet and groomer and is one of the few cats who actually enjoys baths. sometimes helps barou with cleaning by catching all the dust bunnies. his apartment is also insect-free thanks to her. she is, in fact, a baddie. the tomcat next door has tried to get her attention for over a year now, but she refuses to be swayed. he gave her a dead rat once, but mimi swatted it away before telling him he better start paying some bills and look somewhat hygienic before she even looked his way. the only man in her life is barou, and it will stay that way. mimi is also a polydactyl cat, so it looks like she's wearing white mittens. sometimes barou comes home from practice exhausted and collapses face first into bed, and mimi will crawl onto his back to knead his muscles for him.

nagi has a scottish fold. she has white fur and brown eyes, hence her name yuki which is japanese for "snow." she is very similar to nagi. lazy and sleeps all day. their favorite activity together is sunbathing. eats a lot but somehow still manages to stay in shape. she often sits upright like a human and kneads the fur on her tummy. as a kitten, she mirrored nagi's actions, so he got her a mini video game controller. it doesn't actually work, but she gets to press on the buttons whenever nagi is gaming. makes her feel very involved. scientists have also classified her as a liquid. she can get herself through every nook and cranny. even the two millimeter crack under the bedroom door. her favorite place in the house is her bed. has two fluffy blankets and a teddy bear. during winter, she moves her bed closer to the heater. has unofficial beef with choki because she tried to eat him once. ended up with spines in her mouth and never touched a houseplant after that. choki still has a giant missing chunk from where his arm was bitten off.

reo has a persian cat. her royal title is kana-hime because she is a spoiled princess. she has silky fur that smells like perennial roses. has an entire room to herself and a private chef. reo has like 3134736845 pictures of her on his phone. she is even included in the holiday cards and family portrait above the fireplace mantel. her collar is made of sterling silver with a diamond in the nameplate. very coquette. pink bows are her favorite. sensitive paws so reo customized a pair of small fur booties for her. clingy and has attachment issues (just like her owner.) sometimes goes on playdates with yuki. said playdates involve yuki just sitting there while kana-hime gives her a full body grooming session and makeover.

sae owns a siamese. light blue eyes and a dark patch of fur on her face and paws. she does not have a name because sae never formally adopted her. one morning he had gone to practice and returned to a mother and her kittens on his fire escape. sae did not keep the kittens, but unfortunately the mother was very persistent, so he let her stay. despite originally being a stray, she is very clean. always licking herself and sae's hands. not very picky but has a preference for seafood, specifically surume. very productive during the day. rearranges her bed and water bowl. scratches her post five to six times. takes a daily stroll on the rooftops of madrid. she doesn't have a collar, but somehow always manages to return safely to sae's window. has an almost sixth sense when it comes to his emotions. if she senses he is tired, she will hop onto his lap and force him to lay down and give her pets. if she sees that he is stressed, she rubs her head under his chin to calm him down. probably the only emotional attachment sae has had ever since he left japan.

kaiser has a norwegian forest cat. it has golden fur, dark stripes, and blue eyes. has a little mane around his neck, so he resembles a small lion. his name is klaus. basically a mini kaiser. preens in front of the mirror every morning alongside michael. prances around as if he owns the entire establishment. bullies other cats but is scared shitless in the presence of dogs (even chihuahuas). has a little habit of gently biting kaiser's finger. not enough to draw blood but enough to leave a little imprint from his fangs. it's his way of showing love. nuzzles against kaiser's neck tattoo when he picks klaus up. a very needy baby at night. cannot sleep well in any place that is not michael's bed. needs to be tucked in like a child with his stuffed animals and blankets. ends up sleeping on kaiser's face by the time the morning rolls around. has perfect loafs, as in 11/10 if it was a competition. side-eyes ness whenever he comes to visit. extremely judgmental to the point kaiser suspects klaus must have been a human in his past life. knows how to pose for photos and even tilts his head to capture a good angle.

[ninadove]

What she says: I’m fine

What she means: The narration in Representation states that “the King, the Queen and the Lord of War” desperately wanted the Good Princess to bear a child, but makes a point to exclude her own wants from the equation. The implication is that Amelie never wanted a child, most likely because she herself was already suffering abuse from Colt and didn’t want to inflict it on another person. Yet Emilie and Gabriel went behind her back anyways, convinced that they could “fix” her shitty marriage for her by giving Colt a doll to play with — not stopping for a second to consider the consequences of their actions. What makes this even more uncomfortable is the use of the pillows to represent baby bumps, implying that the Senticousins were created not as babies, but as fœtus directly into their mothers’ wombs. Meaning Amelie was effectively used by both her parents and her husband as a brood mare (which is fucked up and a pretty ballsy thing to show in a kids’ show), but also that she would likely have had no way of suspecting her child was any different from the others until he figured it out for himself and told her — this would explain why she had trouble believing Gabriel, the only other adult in their remaining family, was evil from the get-go. Most importantly, Amelie was the only person in this whole sect of insane people who never wanted a child, and she was ripped of her bodily autonomy the same way Sentibeings are, and yet. She doesn’t resent Felix at all. In fact, she is consistently seen standing up for him, protecting him, and following his lead even when he comes up with completely batshit crazy plans, because she loves him. She loves him! She loves her son and turned out to be the only decent parent in this entire cult, and I love her, does she know I love her? Someone tell her I love her please —

[clockworkdragonffxiv]

Further thought about the dragons in Final Fantasy XIV because my power has grown beyond control because I was bored at work and it popped in my head:

It's mentioned a lot in Heavensward that dragons don't remember things the way humans do. Their memories are perfect to a degree that memories don't fade so for them every trauma is this gushing fresh agony in their mind, like how Nidhogg is so incredibly pissed off because he remembers in excruciating detail finding Ratatoskr's butchered corpse and the Ishgardians gorging on her flesh.

Well, not so much remembers as he's actively experiencing it. All the time. Forever. Dragons live in the now with an intensity humans can barely comprehend, and I really think they don't process time in the same we do. We experience time linearly. Past, present, future.

Dragons don't. For them existence is experienced all at once forever. I'm not sure they even entirely distinguish between present and past and future, because it all feels the same to them, and I think that it impacts them in strange ways.

Like I don't think dragons really plan the way humans do. Everything is experienced in the Now. So I think for the vast majority of them, human tinkering and building completely baffles them. Oh they see the utility but it's not something they'd come up with on their own.

This extends to things like buildings. They certainly have the raw strength to repair the structures there, but it's not something they'd ever think of. Because repairing the castles means scouting out the proper stone, quarrying it, planning the repairs, etc.

Nidhogg's war against Ishgard is the closest thing to planning we see from them, and that was literally "torture them forever."

Also why Nidhogg was batshit insane. Because for him, he's always and will forever be at that one moment in time: finding his sister's corpse as the Ishgardians she'd been fascinated by and befriended feasted on her flesh like a pack of jackals. He never left that moment. I mean, the narrative flat out tells us that, but really holy shit is that a horrifying thing to think about. Like existentially.

It's probably the reason he could bodyjack Estinien so easily: because until the end of Heavensward, whenever Estinien closed his eyes for a second he could smell the ashes and roasting flesh from Nidhogg burning Estinien's family and entire village alive.

Also, consider that Midgardsormr went through far, far worse. The fact that the guy mostly comes off as grumpy and old should tell you about just how ridiculously tough he is. And why he spends all his time sleeping. Because whenever Midgardsormr was awake he was watching his world burn.

That and probably why he loved Hydalen and his alliance with her and devotion to her. She was as tough as he was, and had been through so much and carried on despite unimaginable woulds and pain. And she still gave him shelter when he had nothing left. That kind of compassion and strength was something he respected.

As a side note, I would be interested to hear from Middy about his thoughts on Hydalen's passing. Then again, he might not mourn her. After all, she'll live forever in his memories, as whenever he closes his eyes he still sees the radiant woman with the weight of the world on her shoulders meeting an exhausted and desperate dragon with the last eggs of his kind and providing them shelter and safety. And he feels the intensity of the sudden hope he felt then with every breath. How could he not love her?

She'll always be with him.

[kerubimcrepin]

Live-read: "Julith et Jahash" - Part 1

In the past, I said that I would wait for a translation that is currently in the making in the russian fandom. However, because I am weak, and want to keep this blog going asap, I lied. (This liveblog will be very slow due to this, so be warned.)

This comic will let us understand Joris better... while literally all of his personality, morals, body language, and tastes, are a product of Kerubim, — this might shed light on A. family history, that might dictate his physiology (what if Julith randomly says she has an allergy? This isn't real, but it would be big for Joris lore), and the things he went through after the movie: what experience he would have with the huppermage culture, which he was cut off from for his entire life thus far.

Question: is there a single member of this family who DOESN'T fish??

Kramdam is a part of Rok Island, the name of which will be familiar to you if you're A. a player of the MMOs, B. batshit insane about Joris lore.

It might be silly, for me to point this out, but listen: the movie, the series, they all happen hundreds of years before the Dofus MMO, — so to have confirmation that Rok Island is that old, is very interesting.

I had previously said that huppermages aren't very fond of cultures outside their own, and I want to elaborate, so that my words aren't misconstrued: Huppermages culture is, in a lot of ways, a mixture of different classes, — because a lot of huppermages aren't born huppermages, but instead, people who convert to this class, and a lot of their spells are inspired or taken from other classes. However, not assimilating fully is... very unwelcome.

Having a history of oppression and at least one genocide in the years after the movie, made huppermages very understandably conservative and closed-off. But this culture, as we'll see from this comic, had some pretty toxic traits even before those scars.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. Like I already knew about this, but I want you to understand: the stupid fucking log thing is a family trait.

Do you think Joris told Bakara "I hate magic, I hate magic, I hate magic. I HATE WANDS. I HATE STAFFS. I KEEP BREAKING THEM. LET ME OUT. LET ME OUT OF THE ACADEMY. STOP HAVING ME BE ENROLLED!!!!" and the next day she brought him a fucking log. Do you think this is what happened.

So small, and already sure that she'll never be as good as her brother... man.

Also... Bakara and Joris looked very similar as kids. At least that's my opinion.

I didn't think this comic would make me emotional, but the Jurgen family having a thing for logs is making me violently ill.

It probably was Bakara who gave him that bright idea. And Kerubim was probably like "ok son, I am someone who also uses blunt weapons, I can teach you how to do this."

There isn't some "i like to use logs" gene, it was all just Joris preferring to use melee, Bakara's memories of Jahash's melee skills, and Kerubim's skill in melee fighting.

It is just... insane to me, how Joris ends up doing this one thing that his biological father liked to do, despite how different they are as people. Despite Joris likely feeling absolutely nothing towards the man.

Well, that, or he fucking hates Jahash, though probably not as much as Julith.

Think about it this way, — Jahash and Julith ruined his childhood by their reappearance. They ruined his life for the next few decades too, probably. And after? They would always be a shadow over his life, for as long as they are remembered. It's always either "you're evil and we don't trust you because you're Julith's son" (even though he knows that Julith was framed,) or "you're not good enough, even though you're Jahash's son. How come?" (even though he knows from Bakara that... Jahash was just a man. Even if it is hard for him to put together the almost-holy image of his father as seen on the stained-glass in a temple, and the image of him that Bakara talks about, — a human person, who had fears and dreams.)

The only way for Joris to live his own life, without any judgement or comparison, without being reminded of how shit his childhood was, is to wait for the World of Twelve to forget who the fuck a Julith and Jahash even are. It's logical for him to have some irrational resentment.

And yet he brings a log to a nuke fight in season 4. Jahash would never do this, because he got good at magic, but he WOULD approve.

His parents would have loved him a lot, if they had the chance.

List of things that Joris and Bakara share:

Neurotic perfectionist who struggles with self-hatred about their skills and their body.

Cute ass behaviours and expressions as children.

Alcoholism (this is my fanon for Joris. It came to me in a vision. He's just like Kerubim and Bakara, — needs to get shitfaced to cope.)

Haunted by Jahash's success in life, even though Jahash would NEVER have wanted either of them to be haunted.

Thin grabbable waist and twinkish/waifish looks as adults. (Joris is already a twink, despite his 3ft stature, but NEVER forget the official concept art of how Joris would look if he wasn't possessed by a dragon as an infant. He would be a tall, blonde, anime twink instead.)

Whisperers have, historically, been used as servants by Bontarians and Huppermages.

Though by Waven times, they are enemies of the state (at least dissenting ones), and Joris wants you to beat the shit out of them, for the sake of his beautiful nation. (because they're dissenting)

Jahash and Bakara grew up with their dad, Juvence Jurgen.

By huppermage standards, they lived in very unusual conditions.

"All huppermage towers are super-protected, we WILL die if we don't take precautions, so I will go ahead, and deliver the message myself."

Yeah, no, they're not typical huppermages. I guess Joris has a lot in common with Bakara and Jahash. (I keep making myself sad, thinking about this.)

He thinks that Jahash and Bakara are some local hicks/rednecks that the huppermage has been experimenting on, which raises many red flags. Like the fact that apparently, human experimentation is a thing that some huppermages do. Then he thinks that the huppermage is experimenting on his own kids.

The headcanon that Jahash might have had some learning disabilities that he gave to Joris as one last "sayonara you weaboo shit" genetical move, and that it was REALLY hard for him to learn magic and impossible for Joris, stays winning.

By the way, I guess this is a good time to give you the next, very funny piece of trivia:

Joris's name literally means "George George the Farmer Farmer".

I think it's likely that, historically, before Jahash's success in life, their family were just some random poverty-stricken farmers, who happened to be huppermages.

I'M SO FUCKING SAD ABOUT THEM.

Grandpa Jurgen is literally so fucking real.

THE HEADCANON THAT JAHASH MIGHT HAD LEARNING DISABILITIES THAT HE GAVE TO JORIS AS ONE LAST "SAYONARA YOU WEABOO SHIT" GENETICAL MOVE, AND THAT IT WAS REALLY HARD FOR HIM TO LEARN MAGIC AND IMPOSSIBLE FOR JORIS, STAYS WINNING.

Juvence really cares about his kids.

"If you don't do as master says, he will kill you and all your loved ones."

Guys I'm starting to think, that between this, the political intrigues, the bullying, the "using Bakara for PR while she becomes a teenage alcoholic and not giving a shit about her" thing, — that the huppermage academy and temple, are um.... not actually Good, as an institution.

To most this is "an honour," and yet, this random selection process chose a teenage huppermage who, by all accounts, can't do magic and doesn't know a single spell.

I'm so fucking sad.

You know what else these two quotes can apply to? Haha. well. I ask you to imagine Jahash's funeral, and—— [i collapse on the floor weeping]

"He was always more like a father to her, than an older brother."

I am going to crash my car into the sea. And I don't even have a car.

[gratisdiamanten]

Heyyy so I’ve been reading the new max biography and in there is this passage about Jos’s dad locking him in room as a kid 😭 anyway the entire family sounds absolutely wild so was wondering if you had anymore batshit lore about this family ❤️❤️❤️

Ps tyyy for being the verstappen family historian

This sounds insane but I've never read the biographies (never made myself spend the money). I HAVE heard about Frans locking Jos in the van after bad races and making him cry and scream himself to exhaustion and leaving him there for ages before letting him out. I gleaned this one from a Dutch-language article. It's paywalled, just use 12ft.io. Probably the most formative and gut wrenching part of it was probably reading his childhood nickname 'Josje' which is like. Almost entirely a girl's name. I can't explain how that makes me feel.

Jos en Frans trainen veel en reizen heel Nederland en, later, Europa door voor races. Frans kan hard zijn voor Jos. Als die op jonge leeftijd een keer crasht met zijn kart, wordt hij voor straf opgesloten in het busje waarmee ze de circuits afgaan. De huilende Jos zou met zijn vuistjes tegen het raam hebben geslagen – maar hij mocht er onder geen beding uit. [Jos and Frans trained and traveled a lot all over the Netherlands and, later, Europe for races. Frans could be hard on Jos. When the latter crashed once with his go-kart at a young age, he was locked as a punishment in the van they used to travel to circuits. The crying Jos would have banged his little fists against the window - but he wasn't let out under any circumstances.]

"‘Project Max Verstappen’: hoe een Limburgs jochie wereldster werd": Danielle Pinedo, Steven Verseput. NRC, 2020

[saldotz]

I feel like people don't give Mike enough credit in his ability to be absolutely batshit insane. This is the same man who beat a man half to death because he thought he was kidnapping a child. the same man who went at FREDERICK FUCKING FAZBEAR WITH A CHAIR. the same man who went at murderous animatronics (who'd been after his ass the whole time, mind you) with an electronic TAZER. the same man who got an entire CHUNK taken out of his leg and still kept going.

Mike Schmidt may be 25 years old, 5'6 and without a bachelor's degree, but he will not hesitate to whoop straight ass if anyone tries to come at him or his family or die trying and that's on GOD

[the0retically]

The Suckening: The Unseen One #5:

I wrote down all of my thoughts while listening to the episode and a lot of quotes that I just love, Wild episode y’all my god, spoilers below!

- “He did a very respectable one point of damage then DIED” CHARLIE PLEASE

- Emizel come back please

- “I’m walking at a soccer mom speed” ARTHUR??

- WHY IS EDWARD TWILIGHT OK

- DEACON! “That is deacon, that is my boy right there” me too shilo

- Oh god combat right out of the gate with Deacon

- Oh my god none of them are safe, they’re all going to die

- “You’re such a wieners boy” “I GAVE YOU WIENERS, BOY!”

- ……Arthur?? You ok?

- “Deacon you’re friends are already dead” SHILO PLEASE

- I love how they stop fighting just because Shilo asks them to

- Deacon and Arthur are now just flirting, goodness

- I LOVE GREFGORE!!!! He’s insane, why was he climbing on the top of the building????? He just attacked Deacon

- HE ROLLED 6 SUCCESSES WHAT????? GREFGORE PLEASE

- DID HE JUST KILL DEACON????

- GREFGORE I LOVE YOU

- ok deacon’s ok oh my god

- GREFORE PLEASE!! He’s batshit, he’s amazing, just fully elbowed Deacon down into the ground and beat him into unconsciousness

- EMIZEL!!!!!!!!!!! HE OPENS HIS EYES!!!!!!!! LETS GO!!!!!!!!

- Oh? Pepper is here! In this creepy blood space!

- BUT HES AWAKE!! HES OUT OF THE RUIN!! Butt naked?? BUT PEPPER GOT HIM!!

- THEO!! OH MY GOD??? He can’t drink soda so now he’s just an alcoholic????

- God as someone who’s named Theo it will never not fuck with me whenever they refer to Soda as Theo

- “There’s water” “Shut Up about Water man”

- Oh god the castle burnt down

- “I guess it’s big since it’s on Fox News” “yeah you see it switch over and a news anchor go: ‘Now back to racism’” BASED CHARLIE SLIMECICLE SO FUCKING BASED—“Change the channel to Family Guy now” HAHA WHY ARE THEY SO GOOD AT THE VOICES?? Bizly, Grizzly PLEASE

- The boys are going insane this episode oh my god

- The image of Deacon and Arthur both opening the door to the “sex motel” is so funny

- The twins!! They’re bonding but also not at all

- Oh :( “emizel…I thought you were dead” shilo :(

- Shilo is losing it, he’s Angry boy

- “Are you really my brother?” :(

- “Grefgore we’re going to go sulk in the closet”

- “I thought you were going to protect me?”

- Oh more Arthur lore!!!!

- THE GRIFFITH OBSERVATORY??

- Ooooh the unseen one, interesting

- “And you’re looking good, you’re looking real good” DEACON?? YOU FIRST TRIED TO KILL HIM NOW YOU’RE JUST FLIRTING-I swear at some point deacon’s gonna take Arthur out to the woods and ya know

- “It’s cool, I shot you” “yeah she’ll be hearing about it” SHILO?? MY GOD

- Shilo if anything bad happens to you I’m gonna sob

- Goodness there’s so much to unpack from the conversation between Arthur and Deacon when the boys decide to go with Arthur and that they feel safer with him

- Like Arthur is so scared and tells them that he is not reliable and he won’t be able to keep them safe but they both are just comfortable with him and the fact that he’s been trying this entire time is what matters more

- I love their dynamic so much

- Arthur immediately trying to not let the boys see the threesome is so funny and wholesome??

- “Greg Fore” “that is weird my prince” GREFGORE!

- “How can we expedite the scene?” “….we’re going into a new scene right now” BIZLY PLEASE THE SCENE ENDED WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY BOY?

- “Is this a brothers thing? Are we doing a brothers thing?” “I think we are” I LOVE THEM

- “I love you very much” “I love you too my prince” I LOVE THEM

- WHY ARE THEY JUST DOING FAMILY GUY VOICES

- I do love that emizel is trying to help shilo out when he’s crying and he’s just comforting him :( I love the brothers so much

- Oh no-is she dead?? Charlie that’s horrible, Shilo can talk about it now so she cannot be ok

- Arthur what is your deal?

- Charlie why do you love to make mothers who try their hardest but ultimately come up short it breaks me

- “The only way life has meaning is because there’s death at the end of it” Arthur :(

- He feels betrayed and is in an anguished frenzy :(

- “I look at him and Arthur just sees himself” PLEASE THEY BREAK ME

- “I’m kicking dumpsters” ok—WAIT

- WHAT?? EMIZEL??? HE JUST GOT A STAKE THROUGH HIS HEART OH MY GOD EMIZEL DUDE??

- GREFGORE STOP CLIMBING ONTO ROOFS PLEASE IM CRYING WITH LAUGHTER

- “You look a little less sad today, good for you” :(( Arthur is getting happier

- STOP BULLYING THEO!!!!!! LEAVE HIM BE!! He’s just so sad now :((

- Shilo and Grefgore make me so happy :((

- “Is this how you felt when you put Felipe in the plot?” CHARLIE

- “Roll to see if he goes into rehab or if he gets worse” JUST LET HIM GET BETTER

- Arthur hears his name?? In the room with the Unseen??

- Oh god yeah here’s the horror, thank you Slimecicle time to be Scared

- This walk down the corridor is so scary, the fact that Emizel heard Theo yell out to him SO FREAKY so well done!!

- CHARLIE STOP MAKING THEM HEAR THE VOICES OF WHO THEY CARE ABOUT

- “You were always the best of us, weren’t you shilo?” Charlie loves that line doesn’t he

- God Grizz why did Arthur open his eyes and NOW BIZLY AND CONDI HAVE TO LEAVE??

- “I open my eyes” “are you serious? I thought that’d be harder” CHILLS

- oh god he has to get them to open their eyes too, what is up with Grizz having to be against the boys in Charlie’s campaigns

- “Emizel I will lose no more family today, don’t listen to him” IM CRYING

- CONDI WHY AHHAHA

- The continuous bit of Grefgore just scaling the ceilings and walls is so funny

- This encounter with The Unseen is So Cool I love this

- I love this so much, the shifting voices and asking for knowledge to keep is just so Well Done, I adore this, Charlie this is epic

- AMAZING SESSION OH MY GOD LOVED IT, new favorite episode of this campaign it was amazing

[klanced]

i just finally watched the batman (2022) and need a repository for my thoughts

anyway yes i know i am the voltron blog but you all must understand. and this is key to my lore. that i am an insane batman fan. i haven't kept up with comics in recent years but i am a total sleeper agent when it comes to batman and i've been waiting literal months to watch The Batman (2022) and i finally watched it last night and have been marinating in my thoughts since. and also my parents are tired of hearing my ranting and watching me walk around in circles.

ANYWAY.

-

cinematography

this is literally the best looking batman film in years, if not the best looking one ever. the color grading was like a balm to my eyes, especially after the slog fest that is some of the other superhero movies... even with the constant rain the city never looked washed out, reeves and his set designers made such awesome choices when it came to fluorescent and neon lighting... the DINER SCENE!!!!!!!!!!! also omfg the way they made battinson the Red and Black Batman like what an excellent color combination. i loved it. i need to buy some of the theatrical release posters post HASTE.

more than anything this movie was SHOT like a comic book and so many scenes looked like they were ripped straight from a comic book, like i could visualize the paneling and everything... so freaking baller.

my family wasn't super impressed but i think it's because they expected an action movie but No You Don't Get It. batman sees the world as a gritty detective noir movie but to everyone else in gotham they're living in a horror movie and that is BATMAN CINEMA!!!!

when the riddler was arrested i was like 'wait there's still 40 minutes?' and then i preceded to have my mind completely blown. i kept questioning what reeves was doing only for him to IMMEDIATELY correct me minutes later. literally, let this man cook he knows what he's doing. when bruce lit the flare i didn't immediately get it -- and then the little mayor's boy reached for batman without any hesitation. and then the crowd began to follow him, closing the distance. and then he began to lead them to higher crowd. And Then I Got It.

-

2. gotham

yes i'm devoting an entire section just to the city.

gotham city is one of the hardest things to get right in any kind of batman media. like gotham is Not Normal and that should always be something hovering in the background. but many directors just don't bother because gotham architecture is so fundamentally different from normal sensibilities that building lore accurate sets would be both incredibly costly and almost impossible to do. but matt reeves tried and the movie was so unbelievably better for it.

bvs gotham was basically just new york city and don't even get me STARTED on how futuristic minimalistic modern the nolan movies were. ugh.

but when bruce and alfred were in their penthouse suite surrounded by fifty layers of gothic style trim my dad verbally said 'are they in a fucking church or something' and like YES DAD! that's the POINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! gotham is supposed to be borderline CAMPY GOTHIC like the city itself is not just a setting, it's a full blown supporting character. the city looking batshit is essential lore and PIVITOL to the world building that has produced a man dressed up as a bat to fight crime like you DON'T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! batman is divorced from our reality but he is GROUNDED IN GOTHAM!!!!

actually side note i've been playing gotham knights on the PC and 1) the game is way better than critics gave it credit for and 2) GOTHAM LOOKS SO GOOD IN THIS GAME. THE LIGHTING IS CRAZYYYY. best adaptation of gotham city fr, i loved the arkham video game series but the panache. the style. it became so diluted after arkham asylum fr.

my one criticism is that reeves needed to make one more rooftop set it was so silly that all the characters kept returning to the same gcpd roof with the bat signal on it.

-

3. plot

FINALLY A MOVIE WHERE BRUCE IS A DETECTIVE. i've waited literal years for this. i do wish batman had been a little bit more active/proactive in the plot, i.e. not strictly following with riddler's games, but this is also early batman so i'm more forgiving of his rookie mistakes... however in the second movie i expect him to be on his BALL GAME!!!! give me plot-armor-borderline-prescient batman PLEASE MR. REEVES I BEG OF THEE.

LOVED this adaptation of the riddler. using the zodiac killer as an inspiration for the riddler was amazing, brilliant, showstopping, spectacular. and they kept a little bit of camp in paul dano's performance which i appreciate. i don't think we'll ever go back to batman forever levels of camp, but that's okay </3

there was a nod to the character of hush in the movie (at least that's how i'm choosing to interpret it) but i don't think they could ever use hush in the future because they already adapted so much of his gimmick for the riddler... but that's okay tbh i don't think hush is that interesting anyway.

at its core the batman was a buddy cop movie and i LOVED that. jeffrey wright KILLED it as lieutenant gordon and the dynamic between batman and gordon was amazing. excellent usage of our favorite future-commissioner, you could really see they already had an established rapport but their bond was becoming even stronger... their conversation in the interrogation room was so amazing, as well as their scene with the penguin.

my one criticism is that alfred became non-existent after a certain point. also lowkey the lego batman movie did a better job at the 'bruce realizes that his trauma has made him reluctant to form bonds or deepen them because of his fear of losing anyone else' subplot. lego batman movie on top!

-

4. characterizations

everyone and their mom has already talked about how this version of bruce wayne is more focused on developing his identity as the batman versus his identity as brucie wayne so i won't repeat those essays. but i will say that i have such high hopes for bruce's development in the sequel. like the way the movie ended with him emphasizing how he needs to become a 'symbol of hope for the city' reads to me as him preparing to finally re-enter gotham society as Billionaire Bruce Wayne and i am SO READY FOR IT.

but what i actually want to talk about is how amazing catwoman's development is. i love how much backstory they gave her in this movie. i will always love the nolanverse version of catwoman but you really learn almost nothing about selina in TDKR. but in the batman selina's is this fully fleshed out character. you can immediately guess what her life has been like. and her motivations in the story... the way she was prepared to run until she found annika... and then she immediately changed gears and focused on vengeance for annika and her mother... god, i love it.

cobblepot's character was also so, so good. you can intimately tell that he's a two-faced bastard who's spent years being a yes-man purely so he can climb the social ladder. i know colin farrell is going to rock the HELL out of that monocle in the sequel.

-

5. hopes for the future

i know it's too late but i reallyyy don't want joker to be in the sequel. i unfortunately think that's more or less guaranteed though since they've already casted barry keoghan. and his performance was really good. i'm just tired of seeing the joker in batman media. (inb4 keoghan absolutely kills it in the sequel and makes me eat my hat). i don't really consider batman to have one arch nemesis, only that the joker has consistently ruined batman's life more often than all the other villains.

literally the one hill i will die on is that reeves NEEDS to include robin at some point. PLEASE. you can't have batman without a robin, he gets so lonely. literally that's all i want. i want battinson to become a dad so, so bad. you have no idea.

and (and this is key) robin must be a kid. a pre-teen aged 14 or younger. "oh but that's so unrealistic, child superheroes totally break the immersion" well I DON'T CARE. FULL THROTTLE ON THE CHILD ENDANGERMENT. let children fight crime, for the culture.

[okay, okay. make it a robin origin story where dick grayson is introduced and is plot-relevant but he doesn't actively patrol and fight crime and only becomes robin at the very end.]

introduce robin in batman 2, and then have robin be a participating older teen/adult in batman 3.

my incredibly indulgent ideal batman 2:

at least two years have passed (bruce is more or less settled and has finally hit his stride). he has mastered air gliding and now attacks villains from the rafters instead of just constantly walking out of the shadows. i want to see arkham-level combat So Bad.

selina is mentioned, but doesn't really appear (and there are no other love interests.

actually wait i change my mind about joker. joker can be included in the movie IF the red herring "main plot" is that he's using a circus as a base of operations (because clowns and circuses).

i say red herring "main plot" because the movie starts with a joker crime spree, so you think the movie is going to be all about the joker, but then he leads batman to his circus base and it turns out that PSYCH! THIS IS ACTUALLY A DICK GRAYSON ORIGIN STORY. because joker's base of operations is haly's circus.

batman is snooping around looking for evidence and that's when he comes across dick grayson, age 10.

kid dick grayson. PLEASE. PLEASE.

batman decides to visit the circus as bruce wayne. You Know What happens.

plot plot plot

COURT OF OWLS SUBPLOT.

bruce has to balance hunting down the joker while also protecting this little kid he pretends he isn't totally attached to.

this is incredibly indulgent because i have no idea how you would balance joker screentime with that of the court of owls. idk. that's what's fanfiction is for i guess c:

i have decided that over winter break i am going to rewatch all the batman movies from 1980s onwards so i can revise my Batman Cinema power rankings. i will create some kind of metric or spreadsheet so i can grade and quantify each movie.

hell i should also replay all my favorite batman video games. because those are basically just movies anyway. and i miss kevin conroy :(

thanks for reading. god i love batman.

[strawbs-screaming]

☆ how the boxers were as children ☆

Hey besties, sorry for dissapearing i was busy decaying, enjoy my cringe ass writing

Glass Joe

- Really sleepy & an edgelord, he was the kid that had hair covering the side of his face in middle school

- his parents always said that he wouldnt really be able to take up boxing due to him being a natural coward, jokes on them Joe isnt scared to get hurt (physically)

- loved reading old writing, especially gothic literature, he has a soft spot for dark writing

- wrote cringy edgy poems about every crush he had, his parents sometimes pull them out to torment him

- tried to start his own band, failed miserably

- still attached to his edgelord phase very much

- if he was a teen during the 2000-2010's he def would have a edgy wolf oc and a Deviantart account

Von Kaiser

- sickly victorian child + little german boy hybrid

- his parents always spoke with permission so he also started copying them, leading to him always interrupting people by saying "can i ask something?"

- had that one little german boy outfit, along with the huge ass lollipop and dumb hat, anytime someone pulls out his childhood pictures he prays they dont whip out those photos or he will get bullied recklessly

- NEVER EVER cursed until the wonderful age of 15 when he yelled out the word "fuck" after dropping a wrench on his foot, his dad wasnt even upset he was more concerned because holy fuck his child dropped a wrench on their foot

- got sick really often, he was out here being asked to be taken out into the garden one last time before you all posers

Disco Kid

- that one kid who had a really cool dad that let him do anything as long as he didnt blow up the house

- Really creative, writing up stories with pictures, his grammar wasnt really the best (along with his writing) so his parents had to read "the addventours off the brince" and hold in their laugh

- He was the kid who performed an entire ass dance choreography to get your parents to accept the sleepover invite

- got introduced to Disco music by his dad, got obsessed with it instantly and started dancing everywhere

King Hippo

- ate glue

- never spoke with anyone, Just beat up anyone picking on him and no one messed with him ever since

- people just gave him paper to eat, fresh with colored pencils

- liked to play make believe with his plushies

Piston Hondo

- He let you copy off his homework, i think that tells you enough

- everyone only recognized him for being a smart ass, not being creative and that really upset him

- played chess a whole lot, joined tournaments and won some medals

- academic burnout hit him like a train

- for a while, art and writing was his only escape from stress & pressure, he journaled about his feelings and drew his soul out, due to this he struggled to express his feelings without words

Bear Hugger

- chased everyone around with a spider then ate it, he was so evil for what

- never actually went to school, his parents lived out in the woods and homeschooled him since no one likes walking 2-3 hours straight just to suffer in a seat

- He always had a interest in animals, him and mrs bear go are childhood friends, mrs bear met him when she was a cub, due to this he got spared by mrs bears mom and suddenly had a 2nd mom, once his family realized that their son got adopted by a bear, they kindly let the bears in and treated it like it was normal

- loved fishing with mrs bear, he taught her how to use a rod and she taught him how to catch fish with his bare hands

Great Tiger

- so called "self sufficient" When he was just used to being alone and kinda accepted the fact he'll never have proper friends

- created the most batshit insane scenarios with his clones that would make the average hollywood movie maker shed tears, these gems include: divorce, murder, crime, assault and tea parties

- talked to himself a whole lot to the point where his parents took him to a therapist

- never really made friends, Just made himself his own friend

Don Flamenco

- oh no.

- his dad basically hated him, insulted him a whole lot, made fun of him, literally just made him insecure, when he got the opportunity to escape his dad by boxing, he took it without hesitation and got out of there

- was never really home, he was always out with friends to avoid his dad back at the house

- emotional stability? Who needs that when you can ignore your problems?

- people pleaser no matter what he says

Aran Ryan

- greasy ass bitch

- his parents didnt teach him shit, you think tigers parents didnt care about him? They'll look like helicopter parents next to them when they see what aran has going on

- had bad hygiene, only learned to shower and take care of himself in the 5th grade, thanks to that and his name, my boy got bullied and developed his behavior to defend himself from people

- Always ran from school & home, he had a hide out from away from home and a bit close to school to escape whenever he had the chance, he always dissapeared for a few weeks (sometimes months) and nobody really went looking for him, either from knowing he'll return sometime or they just dont care enough

Soda Popinski

- lonely, him and tiger are the difference between feeling lonely vs being alone, he doesnt handle loneliness well

- grew up with his grandpa & his stories, always loved listening to them and copied him whenever he wanted to tell a story

- never had a proper social life due to having to take care of his grandpa + him getting concerned about soda whenever he was out for too long

- spent most of his time crying from loneliness, away from him

Bald Bull

- precious!!! Was really shy and had a rounder face that everyone in his family pinched like crazy

- extremely sensitive & emotional (he still is hes just bottling it up shh)

- stuttered a lot, think about that one "have you ever had a dream you could you can't you would you you could be anything" kid

- was really short and just shot up one day

- scaredy cat, could be scared from anything, including: bugs, darkness, thunder, needles, sharp stuff, blood, death and alcohol (he also still gets scared easily but shh shut up)

- Always snored in his sleep, inherited it from his dad

Super Macho Man

- obsessed with sharks, dinosaurs, trucks and cars, basically got obsessed with anything he found cool

- his parents spoiled the living fuck out of him, no dime left unspent on him, no quarter spared

- Always lied about having something at the playground, sure Macho i trust the fact that you have "every dinosaurs teeth" 100% never doubted you for a second

- his parents love language was money so it got passed down to him, they were just throwing money at him and fucking off

Mr Sandman

- oldest child in his family, has 4 siblings and loves them all very much, had to help his mom & dad take care of them since they were a handful

- started boxing early so he was never in school that often unless it was 99% neccessary

- slept a lot thanks to him being tired constantly from rushing around

- knows how to do hair & make up from his younger sister

[iloveavatar]

little headcannons of the sully family bc i’m sad and need sully family fluff.

jake 100% is the type of dad to be watching the kids do something with other na’vi and be super competitive- even though it has nothing to do with him.

neytiri def has a little garden somewhere. obv the na’vi find their food in the forest and whatnot but i feel like she would have her own secluded area.

neteyam is a total mamas boy. he loves weaving baskets with her. cooking, flying, cleaning you name it. neytiri needs help? neteyam is on his way!

loak definitely raises his one eyebrow dramatically (the rock meme) whenever someone says something suspicious. he’s so immature with everything someone says.

kiri loves nature obv. she also likes art i feel like. i could see her sitting in the middle of the forest and just doodling on something as the plants around her glow.

tuk. precious tuk tuk. she has little wooden animals carved by her family and she uses them as her play toys. her favorite one is the figure of toruk (for obvious reasons) she loves hearing the story of her dad becoming toruk makto.

loak and kiri act like twins and it drives neteyam absolutely insane. loak is that twin that’s batshit crazy and kiri just stands and watches. the pair gives neteyam multiple headaches.

neytiri and jake like to spend a day with just one child every once in a while so the kids feel special. one day they will visit grace with kiri, another day flying with loak, playing with tuk, and then cooking and hunting with neteyam.

the entire family loves to look at the stars when it’s after eclipse. tuk always tries to find earth on her own, but eventually caves and asks for help.

when loak sleeps, he sleeps in the most random, outrageous positions ever. the rest of the family jokes about how he can predict the weather by the way he sleeps. (aot fans anyone🤞)

neteyam always hums when he does something by himself. talking a walk? he’s humming. weaving a basket? humming. if the guy isn’t humming, his tail usually flicks a beat on whatever surface it can find.

jake has the mindset that he can still do the same things he did when he was younger. he tried to do a front flip into a pond and fell in such an awkward position that neytiri was left laughing at him for a week.

neytiri loves to spin for some reason. when she is by herself cleaning their tent she just likes to spin around as she cleans. it’s the most innocent thing ever. she wouldn’t never admit that she does this though so don’t ask.

ok i feel slightly better now. enjoy! 😋😋

~S!

[superectojazzmage]

Sure it’s been said, but the real bread and butter of SpyXFamily imo is how Yor and Loid have polar opposite but equally batshit stupid and insane approaches to the whole “spies pretending to be a normal family” thing that lead to the same result of them functionally becoming their cover identities.

Loid has some weird denial complex from his life as a spy where he views everything he does as part of some kind of 5D mental chess game that he’s playing against some nebulous threat and approaches his cover identity accordingly, effectively being the “haha I was only pretending to be retarded” meme but with being a husband and father instead of internet trolling. Every interaction he has with his wife and daughter is accompanied by a machiavellian internal monologue about how this is all an elaborate scheme to further the mission. He could be taking Anya out for ice cream and be internally thinking “yes, now that I’ve given my daughter a delicious frozen treat, Westalis shall achieve ultimate victory!!!”. He could be dicking down Yor and he’d spend the entire time thinking about how his wife’s orgasm will bring about the fall of Ostania. He is so obsessed with being a fake husband that when he becomes a real husband, he just smirks and goes “all according to keikaku” while taking his family out to the zoo or helping Anya with her homework. And when the slightest problem for his family arises — like thinking Yor is mad at him or that somebody is being mean to Anya — he totally fucking melts down about it in a way that makes no sense for a detached spy, but he still goes through the effort of trying to frame his freak out as a problem for the mission; he’s not having a panic attack about his wife being mad at him because he loves her, he swears, he’s just worried about the mission!

And meanwhile Yor is just… all fucking in. She’s a method actor to the most unhinged extreme imaginable. She heard “you have to pretend to be a housewife to avoid drawing suspicion” and decided that meant she had to literally become a housewife. She’s the Daniel Day-Lewis of assassins. She throws her whole body and soul into every single thing she does, completely immerses herself in the “role” to the point that it isn’t a role anymore, it’s just her life. Within seconds of meeting Anya she’s like “guess I’m a mom now!!!!”, within seconds of Loid proposing she’s like “yep I love my husband!!!!”. She still has all her assassin instincts and training, but they’re all warped to fit her new life as a milf because that’s what she is now; she’ll brutalize or kill anybody who even looks at her family the wrong way, she approaches every situation from the perspective of “how can I eliminate this problem?”. And like any good method actor, she obsesses over whether her behavior is “correct” to the role. She is determined to be indistinguishable from a normal housewife to a point that you wonder how she has time to be an assassin anymore when all she seems to really care about is trying to win at being Totally Normal and/or being a good wife and mother.

And then in the middle of it all, you’ve got telepathic Anya just listening in on it and doing or saying the weirdest shit imaginable because she’s a kid and has no comprehension of why this situation is completely bizarre, this is just her mom and dad being cool spies.

It’s S-Tier stuff.

[ms-existentialcrisis]

Dancing With The Devil || #1

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Chapter 1: Prologue

Note: My first chapter!!! I went pretty hard for this one so it's quite long. Reader is insane btw and will continue being one so just a warning!! This is unbeta'd or edited so I apologise for the grammatical and spelling errors, English isn't my first language. Hope you guys enjoy :>

SUMMARY: You try to not be a bitch because your mother raised you right except that the woman was dead and so was your father and your brother is about to marry you off to the son of a crime syndicate leader, thinking that the union would save the empire of crime your father worked hard for that he destroyed in year. It's a very big mistake and you'll be damned if you didn't make your brother, your soon to be husband and his family pay.

✨ Masterlist >> || { next }

Tags/Warnings: weapons and violence, blood, cursing, cannibalism, gore (?), a decapitated head, implied SA (very light!) Reader is fucked and batshit insane and will continue being one, if playing an unhinged bitch isn't Ur cup of tea then this isn't for you! Don't like , don't read; MDNI!!

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Just smile and look pretty, is what your brother tells you.

Just smile and look pretty and be an obedient little wife to him, is what he advices.

You already knew what was expected of you; the long talks after the deal was made was a testament to that but your brother always found it better to remind you every fucking day of what awaits you.

What kind of life you were about to live and what type of bullshit was gonna be demanded of you. It's a precaution, he says, to dissuade any ideas of escape you've got brewing in your head.

But you know what it really is: that bastard rubbing a handful of salt to your still bleeding wound; the fact that you're entirely powerless to stop the arranged marriage that would secure your brother a powerful ally and business partner in weapons dealing and trafficking rings.

Well, not entirely powerless. You'll be damned if you'd allow yourself to be used as some bargaining chip to power.

Fuck your brother.

_

You looked exquisite, face painted with make up and body decorated with the finest silk and most expensive jewelleries.

It's what your helpers told you, what the brides maids said when they saw you. People you don't know, smiling at you and telling you to smile because it's your big day and you're about to get fucking married.

Many would say that getting married to a rich powerful man wouldn't be so bad. You'd be a trophy wife whose only job is to serve and provide for your husband, opening your legs for him to fuck and use.

Truthfully, it didn't sound bad. Being Jonas' wife would have you bathing in milk and enjoying the finest things life would offer. Except you didn't really like that; the life of luxury wasn't something new to you.

Having been raised in a family that's balls deep in the life of crime and wealth, you're not new to waking up to people ready to kiss your foot. Your brother liked to call you a spoiled brat and maybe you were, your mother liked to dote on you after all, but you weren't a stranger to the difficulty of life.

In your family, hierarchy and respect was important. That's why your brother grew up as he did. A fucking cunt who's ego is bigger than the sun considering that he's raised to believe that he'd come after your father and his empire once the old man dies.

He was the heir and was treated as such. You? You were simply the daughter, one that would one day used to be a bargaining chip, a plug for whatever hole your brother manages to shoot open.

You grew up in violence just like him, learned just like him but you're treated less simply because you were a woman. Because you didn't have a dick between your legs; things that if your brother did would have people supporting him but would have you called insane and too much.

You were far from stupid or naive, unlike what people liked to think. You're not clean or pure or whatever stupid bullshit your brother advertised to Jonas and his family to get them to agree to this union but you're told to play that act and so play that act you did (after plenty of threats).

You seethed behind that mask however and you weren't afraid to show it once the door is closed.

"I'm going to kill myself!" You shrieked at the top of your lungs, shaking a finger to your blank faced brother. "Either you cancel this bullshit or I'll fucking put a bullet in my head!"

"A bit late for that, yes? The wedding will start in an hour so knock it off with your tantrum already," He hissed at you from where he sat on the couch of your private room, the brides maids and helpers ushered out the very moment he stepped in.

"You think I wouldn't do it?" You hissed back. The scowl your sporting twisted your pretty face. God you hated the fucking make up they put you in, too much foundation and the wrong fucking shade. You never did like the common make up used for weddings and now you hated it even more.

16 years old you did her make up better than this.

"You're a coward," Kane says simply, an eyebrow raised. Handsome, what women would call him. To you, he's a shit faced cunt who's deep in his head.

"Mama wouldn't stand for this," You threw at him. "She would never agree to me getting married off to some bitch with money and business!"

"No she wouldn't, but she would say yes either way because father would agree to it," He intones. "There's also the fact that she's dead and so is father. It's up to me to do what needs to be done for this family, Rosie."

You flinch, a flash of hurt hitting you in the chest before it's overcome by anger. The nickname has your hand coming to grip the rose necklace your mother had gifted you for your 18th birthday.

Turning away, you hold it closer to your chest. You hear your brother shuffle behind you, a sigh echoing in the silent room.

"This is for the family, Rosie. For the business and the legacy father left us both."

"Oh fuck off will you?!" You whirled to stare at him incredulously. "Legacy for the both of us?! No! Legacy for you brother! Just for you! For you to lead! For you to ruin!"

"Mama and Papa are dead and I took that as a chance to finally get away from you and your fucking stupidity yet you chase me to bring me back so I could fix this goddamed mess you started!"

"You ran away is what you did! You had a duty to fulfil and you ran away from it! You're a coward sister!" Kane yells back at you.

"Well it's certainly better than a fuck up son who proceeded to tear down the business in a matter of a year!" You laugh hysterically and what a sight you were, dressed in a beautiful wedding gown and murder written across your features.

You barely dodge the slap to your face and you take pleasure in the way your brother looks more pissed than ever. At the way that you could still push your brother's button in a way no one else could.

Kane has always been the picture of a cool cucumber who liked to look down on people, hiding the fact that he's nothing but a rotting can of horse shit.

(He was your brother once, when you were children; now, all he is was a stranger who wore your brother's face)

It wasn't like you were wrong. Multiple dealings have gone bad and business partners have pulled out of the contracts after your brother assumed the position of leader after your father's death several months after your mother's.

He didn't have it in him to make good decisions or to lead. And he fucked up because he believed otherwise, because your father was just as stupid as he is.

All you wanted was to grieve peacefully in a small town away from your brother and his falling empire but he dragged you back to clean up after him. Getting married to Jonas Strucker, son of Baron Strucker and owner of a massive Trafficking empire, would save your brother's face and business.

He knew that, you knew that and you hated how he thought he could make you do this.

Kane looked like he was going to pop a vein on his forehead, opening his mouth to presumably scream at you again when there's a knock on the door.

"Mr. L/N, the boss is looking for you," A feminine voice called from the other side. Both you and your brother went blank faced but nothing could mask the absolute hate you both are sporting when your eyes met again.

"You are going to go through this, do you hear me?" Kane hisses, a hand coming to grip your arm in a bruising hold to pull you close to him. "You are going to follow your purpose and you are going to fucking serve your husband, whether you like it or not."

You stumble back when he releases you, the ugly feeling of helplessness and rage boiling in you. You wanted to scream, to pull out a gun and shoot him in the head.

God you hated him.

You stand there as he turns to leave, a red haired woman greeting him and coming inside once he's gone. There's a serene expression on your face as one of Jonas' trusted agent came to stop by the still open door.

"Ms L/N, the limo is waiting for you outside," She nods at you, eyes searching. She's wearing a nice black over all, a red leather jacket over it. You eye her back, taking note of the weapons she's possibly sporting.

"Wanda, wasn't it?" You smile at her politely, earlier displeasure gone in favour of being nice to this woman who looked like she'd rather be anywhere else like you. "I like your eyeliner."

The corner of her mouth quirks and she gives you another nod, "Thank you. You look gorgeous as well, Ms L/N."

Wanda Maximoff is a beautiful red haired woman who'd look quiet and unassuming if it weren't for the fact that her eyeliner is sharp enough to kill. She has this cool air around her but her eyes says that you don't fuck with me.

According to what you've heard, she has a brother name Pietro and they've been with the Strucker family since they were children. They're one of the best the family had to offer, their most trusted subordinate.

The Strucker family originated from Sokovia where her and her brother had obviously been picked up from, if Wand's accent is anything to go by. They're one of the bigger mobs that ran the trafficking ring there, connected to plenty of other crime rings.

"Y/N is fine and really, you've got yours done so cleanly. And your smokey eye! It looks good! I never did manage to do mine without making me look like a panda high on drugs," You laugh, moving towards the door and dragging your ridiculously long puffy gown with you.

It wasn't a surprise that you tripped but thankfully, Wanda is there to catch you. You smile at her as she helps you to your feet, one that she returns and keeps on her face when she leads you out of the room.

She doesn't notice the pocket knife you nabbed from her shoved into your dress, hidden away easily by the layers.

--

The wedding is exactly what you expected it to be.

Big and grandiose, the venue filled with guests to the brim.

You spaced out during the half of it, barely flinching when the priest finally told your husband to lift up your veil and not even batting an eye when he leaned in to kiss you, the sound of clapping nearly loud enough to drown the ringing in your ears.

Jonas Strucker doesn't look too bad to the eyes and you'd say he's got a lovely pair of eyes if you ignored how he stared at you. Like a piece of meat for him to eat.

'ill rip it out and keep it in a jar for keepings,' you thought as your eyes met again, the photographer guiding you for the pictures and flashes that nearly blinded you.

Your brother looks smug and joyful at the union, chatting away with the head of the Strucker family and his wife while you posed and smiled for the camera, shaking hands with people you have no interest in.

Briefly, your eyes caught Wanda as she stood by the side, her presumably brother standing with her. You gave her a smile and the knife on your thigh felt heavier and warmer than the ring on your finger.

Your smile widened as your attention shifted back to your new husband.

"You are going to serve your husband, whether you liked it or not," Your brother's words echoed in your mind once again and your smile grew to a grin.

--

"Y/N! Hello dear, you look so beautiful tonight," Baron Strucker is every bit of a slimy old fuck you expected him to be. He grinned at you once he pulled back from the hug he drew you in, his wife following to the same.

You know that thing in cartoons where the husband and wife looked the same? Yeah, that's the case with them. Mentally, you snorted and tried to keep the 'your parents were siblings' joke to a minimum.

"You look lovely my dear," The woman cooes at you. "My son will take good care of you, I raised him myself so I know that. And oh! The children you'll bear," she turns to her husband, "Darling, imagine our grandchildren with her hair and Jonas' eyes!"

"Hmm yes, they'd be adorable. I hope that the two of you will enjoy it tonight," the man laughed, sending you a wink that made your skin crawl.

Oh yes, you'll enjoy it tonight alright.

 --

When Kane received a message on the 2nd night of what's supposed to be your honeymoon week, a pit of apprehension opened in his stomach.

Just a little bit of family dinner, the message said. A private celebration where it's only gonna be you, Jonas, and his parents as well as Kane. It was the most suspicious thing he read.

You grew up together and Kane knew how you could be. Your destructive tantrums and your attitude that could fuel a small country. It's why he called you spoiled; the way you refused to bow your head and follow what your parents told you, holding your chin up and following whatever you wanted.

He knew how cunning you could be and begrudgingly, Kane could admit that you're one hell of a fox in terms of playing and manipulating yourself in and out of situations.

Your mother never did teach you what you were supposed to know and do and Father had always been soft towards you despite his obvious favour towards Kane. It's why you grew up with such a big head, thinking that you could live outside your responsibility of the family.

Kane was more than overjoyed to finally put you in your place despite the circumstances that brought the marriage up in the first place.

Initially, he opted to ignore the message of invite to the dinner but when Mrs. Strucker called him to ask if he was attending as well, he's got no choice but to agree.

Which is why he's currently sitted in the dinner table of the penthouse that you and Jonas' were spending your honeymoon in. He sat facing Mrs. Strucker, the head seat to his right occupied by the family head while the other one remained empty for Jonas' to take.

There's a feast laid out in front of him, recipes he didn't recognise but looked appealingly good. He barely paid them attention when the servants rolled them in unlike the Strucker couple, waiting for you to appear and preparing himself for whatever plan you've cooked up this time.

Once you did appear, you looked gorgeous with your hair up in a clean bun, a few strands loose to frame your rouged cheeks, the red on your lips matching the red dress you picked to wear, bejeweled with glitters that reflected the warm overhead lights to twinkle like stars. Kane recognised it as one of your favourite dresses, the slit on both sides of the fitting fabric and open back showing enough skin that Mrs Strucker gasped in scandal.

Internally, Kane fumed.

That dress didn't leave much for imagination and it didn't fit the image of the shy and quiet sister he shared with Jonas' and his parents.

"That's quite the dress you're wearing, Rosie," he gritted out as you smiled at him serenely. You walked towards the table, bounding towards the Strucker couple and giving them both kisses to the cheek.

"What can I say? Tonight's a special night and I wanted to dress pretty," You shrugged indifferently.

"Well, I could understand the desire but.. did you really have to go with that one?" Mrs Strucker hesitantly asked.

"It's my favourite, auntie!" You laughed as you took the other head seat. Kane tried to kill you with his glare.

"Hmm and what did Jonas say about this, dear?" Mr Strucker eyed you.

"Oh he loved it, uncle," you purred before spreading your arms. "Tonight's special like I said so let's have a feast! I cooked all of this for us to enjoy!"

You urged them to start digging into the meal you've prepared and they reluctantly did so. Kane glared at you while he shoved a piece of meat in his mouth, silently and reluctantly enjoying what you've prepared.

The Strucker couple did not share his reluctance and made it clear.

"My my, this is quite the dishes you've prepared my dear!" Baron praised as he took a bite of whatever he took for his plate. You preened like a fucking peacock, smiling sheepishly.

Kane silently chewed, never taking his eyes off of you before he startled in his seat, finally noticing what, or more specifically, who was missing.

"Where's Jonas?" He asks, barely keeping his voice down.

"Mhm?" You looked up from your meal, blinking at him innocently.

"That's right, dear," Mrs. Strucker nodded. "Not that I don't enjoy this but where's my son? I expected him to be here with us."

"What do you mean?" You asked, brows furrowed in confusion as you tilted your head. Kane's heart dropped, recognising the malevolent mischievous glint in your eyes.

Slowly, he looked down at the meal he was silently enjoying, the pit in his stomach growing deeper.

"He's already here," You intoned, chewing thoroughly.

"Ah what?" Baron says as he placed the glass of wine he took a sip from down. Mrs. Strucker shifted restlessly in her chair, sensing the change of mood.

"I said," You start, putting your fork and knife down to spread your arms around the feast you've prepared, "that he's already here."

Kane went pale, stomach rolling as his fingers went tight around the knife and forks he used to dig into the flesh of his supposed brother-in-law.

He could see the very moment the other two realised what you meant, blood draining out of their face as their eyes surveyed the presented meals. They both started spouting out denials.

When Kane looks back at you, you're sporting a wide manic grin, chewing at a piece of meat you stuck in your mouth. He felt sick, suddenly understanding how much fucking worse you could get the more you're pushed around.

How far you'd go whenever your freedom is threatened.

With a chuckle, you leaned forward to take the cover of one of the bigger plates he didn't even notice and Kane knew what to expect, somehow, but he couldn't keep down the gag of disgust and horror clawing up his throat at the sight of Jonas' head presented like a pig, dressing around it and decorated with fruits.

"Well? How does he taste?" You asked proudly, puffing your chest and taking the plate up so you could show it to the horrified trio in front of you.

"You demonic psychopath!" Baron exploded, rising from his seat so he could shout obscenities at you.

Kane felt frozen in his own seat, looking away in disgust when Mrs Strucker vomitted to the side, starting to cry hysterics after it.

"He's very bad in bed, do you know that?" You say conversationally, accent shifting into a mocking russian one. "Very bad dirty talk and small dick. He cried like a little bitch when I stuck my knife into his side and twisted it."

You did nothing but laugh at the pairs growing horror and grief, eyeing them gleefully.

"There's no one to hear you here, auntie and uncle, so scream your grievances as much as you want," You giggled once Baron started yelling for guards and his men.

Kane have seen men and women be cut into pieces, burned alive or buried in different locations. He's brutal fights and has been part of them, has seen blood and the kind of violence that would belong to monsters.

He believed that he's experienced and seen it all but this?

This act of yours?

It took the cake.

"Looking like a paper there, brother," You sneered once you turned your attention to him.

Your words, the way you spat the word brother out, it made him rise to his seat in pure fucking rage. Baron and his wife looked like they'd gone into shock, heaving and gagging like it'll remove the taste of their son from their mouth.

"I am not your brother," He hissed angrily. "From this day on, I have no sister! What the fuck is going on inside of that head of yours, Y/N?! How could you possibly do this?!"

You went blank faced at his words, eerily staring at him with blank eyes that stared deep in his soul. Kane leaned forward, the edge of the table digging into his front as he balanced his weight on the palms he's got planted on the wood.

You were quiet for a few minutes before a completely malevolent grin split your face, eyes wide and blazing.

You threw your head back at whatever joke you had spinning in your head. The dinning room is now quiet, save for Mrs Strucker's sobs and your shrieking laughter.

Then abruptly, you stopped laughing and the emotions on your face are wiped clean when you directed back the attention to him. Kane barely had the time to duck under the table when you pulled a gun under the table, shooting the hysterical and sobbing couple at the end of the table.

"Fuck!" He yelled over the sound of gun shots and falling bodies, pulling out his own pistol and praying that someone fucking heard the ruckus you raised.

Taking out his phone, he dialed up Dylan, his right hand man, and immediately called for back up. "I need back up!" He whispered yell, crawling under the table and watching out for you. He broke out in cold sweat when the room fell silent, not even the click of your heels to fill it.

When he peeked out of the long clothe draped on the table, you weren't anywhere to be seen.

"Kane? I thought you were with-"

"My sister's gone fucking manic Dylan and I need a fucking back up," he continued to furiously whisper to the phone, earth shattering fear coursing through him.

The last thing Dylan hears from his boss is his terrified yelp as Kane is pulled out from under the table, coming face to face with his dear sister.

"What's the matter, brother? This is supposed to be a private party for us only-" You danced out of the way as he swiped out of you.

You've tucked your pistol away on the tactical strap on your waist that you were most definitely not sporting earlier, a few knives wrapped around you revealed thighs. You took great pleasure in kicking away Kane's own gun.

"Give it up Rosie," He spat, studiously ignoring the cooling corpse of the Strucker couple a few feet away from both of you. "Dylan and our men are on their way. I'll have them spare you if you get on your fucking knees right now!"

"The last person to demand me on my knees was Jonas and look at where he is right now," You crooned, gesturing to the left overs on the dinner table. Kane grimaced, shifting and reluctantly throwing himself at you.

You trade blows, his strength against your agility all the while you screamed at each other. He catches you in the stomach and you retaliate with a right hook, busting his lips. You kick him in the leg, raising your other to hit him on his left and he stumbles backwards.

The two of you are panting as he eyes you, gaze shifting to the gun thrown to the size. He's got a blooming bruise on his face, lips busted. You weren't better, hair disarray and blood down your nose and from the cut on your forehead you got when he threw a vase at you. But you were grinning, relishing at the destruction you've caused and the blood on your brother's face.

Kane lunges at you with a punch. One that you dodge, swinging your legs in a round house kick that he blocks with his left forearm. You twist to catch his other hand, wrapping your right leg around his shoulder and neck, lifting yourself to catch him in triangle choke.

"I fucking hate you," Kane gurgles as he swings you and your weight around, making you grunt as he slams you repeatedly against the ground when he finally falls on your knees.

"I hate you too!" You scream at him, plowing your elbow down to his head. He manages to detangle from you but you don't waste your time, swiping his legs under him.

You quickly straddle him on his chest, busting your knuckles open as you beat the ever loving shit out of him. He struggled under you, nearly bucking you off before he eventually went limp. You don't stop despite feeling his face collapse under your knuckles and rage, not even when his face is a mess of broken flesh and blood.

That euphoric satisfaction in you at the sight of him dies a quiet death, replace with sinking grief. To your brother, you're nothing but a blur of colours and pain.

He doesn't see you cry nor the pain that flashes across your features as you bowed over him, loose hair framing your face like a curtain.

"You're all I had you know that?" You sob silently, cupping his face. "We might hate each other but we're still siblings. We grew up together Kane. Why'd you turn into such a douchebag?"

You get no reply, just his pained wheezes. You continue to cry quietly, body shaking with tears before it turns into something different, starting with a chuckle before turnings into a full blown cackle.

"But then again, it's not like I can talk. I mean, look at me," you say to the quiet room, eyes staring your dying brother down with dead eyes. "Good bye brother."

With that, you pull out your gun and mercilessly shoots him in the head.

You don't know how long you sat there, blankly staring at your brother's corpse, face barely recognisable. It must be a long time because when you finally find it in you to move, the blood has started to dry.

You feel empty, legs shaky when you pull yourself up. You've got a death grip on your pistol, chest tight and stomach rolling. Suddenly, you want to stick yourself in an ice bath, let the cold prickling sensation of ice numb you skin till it's pale and shivering, till you were lightly shuddering and numb to the cold.

It's why you're so caught off guard when the dooble door of the penthouse blast open, footsteps thundering to fill the once quiet room. The mirror to your other side is broken by a winged figure shooting itself inside, mechanical wings tucking itself close as he landed in a crouch.

'shit,' you think to yourself as you throw yourself out of the way, pulling your pistol up and aiming at the men and women that came into your view.

You paused however because you'd expected Dylan and his men for back up.. not these strangers dressed in tactical gears. 'Interpol agents' is what came to your mind but 2 very distinctive faces made you change your mind.

"Wanda?" You called out softly, eyeing the girl who stood behind two very tall and very big men. She had her gaze on Baron and his wife, eyes wide in shock. Her brother and the rest of the people with her seemed to be in similar or varying state of surprise and shock.

"Ms L/N," She hesitantly greeted, your gazes meeting. Everyone's attention snapped to you and you surveyed them all quietly. Your eyes lingered on the two tall men, one short and brown haired while the other blonde, face bearded and hair slicked back.

"I told you, Y/N is fine," You chirped back at her warmly, gun still raised. You tilted your head, "Considering that you work very close with Baron and Jonas, I'd expected that you knew that this is a private celebration."

"Woman you have a different idea of celebration," the winged man whistled as he eyed the cooling corpses. Another red haired woman has started investigating the dinner table, Wanda's brother still staring at Baron's body in shock.

"It was a special occasion," You shrugged, looking indifferent but internally, you were panicking.

You vaguely recognised this people, men and women associated with the Merchant of Death, biggest and baddest dealer of weapons and advanced technology.

The Merchant of Death was a very picky man and to get into a contract with him was a difficult thing. You seriously doubt that the Strucker family would have connections with him considering that they're tighly tied with the Hydra mob but seeing that the Maximoff siblings are very cozied with them and they went in guns blazing, you can only assume that they're here for you and what you've done.

"She cooked him," Your gun snaps to the woman by the dinner table, poking Jonas head. You squint at her, slowly recognising her as one Natasha Romanoff, former agent of Red Room, an illegal agency that was busted several years ago by another agency after it was discovered that most of their agents came from another massive Trafficking ring.

It wasn't a public news but it was a big deal for the neighbouring crime rings, seeing such big organisations go down and be revealed in just a day.

Natasha Romanoff was notoriously known for her skills as an assassin and she was a woman nobody wanted to cross.

'Fuck,' you thought, starting to sweat.

"Could see your fight or flight instinct fighting from here, doll," A voice drawled and your attention snapped at the brown haired man casually poking at your brother's corpse. By now, the group have broken to snoop around the room.

You meet his piercing gaze head on and you try not to get lost in his icy silver blue eyes, the way they seemed to strip you bare. You raised your eyebrow and puffed up your chest when his gaze roamed down your body.

"Take a pic, it'll last longer," You grunted, shifting your stance so one of your legs are more revealed than the other through the slit of your dress. You know you don't look your best at the moment considering that beat down you lashed out but you'll be damned if you didn't make sure that you're at your hottest in your last moments.

He chuckled, the rasp to his voice nearly enough to distract you from the cursing from other side of the room.

"Shit for real?" Wings cursed, eyeing the meals you prepared in disgust, awe and horror. "That's just nasty man."

"Hey!" You say indignantly. "He makes a great meal you fuck head! Don't disrespect my cooking!"

"Well, this is unexpected," Tall, blonde and handsome says as he crouched by Baron's corpse, eyeing thoughtfully. "Thought your brother was the psychopath, with the violent and destructive reputation he's made for himself when he assumed leader to your empire."

"Add 'idiot' to that," You snarked, returning his stare. They didn't seem interested in killing you or taking you in for what you've done. In fact, they didn't seem to care at all that Baron, his wife and your brother are dead as well as Jonas.

"how about you put the gun down, Ms L/N?" Pietro gestures at you and the pistol you've got trained on them.

"Not until I know what you're here for," you grinned shakily.

"We're not here for you," Icy eyes tells you, brows raised. "So better put that gun down before you shoot someone."

"You think I don't know how to use this?" You gritted at him.

"Opposite actually. Seeing what you've done here, it's much better that we talk instead of shoot yes?" Romanoff comes to stand close. The others shift as well, done with poking around to stare at you with undivided attention.

You glare at them all, defensive.

"Relax sweetheart, were not here to hurt you. We just wanna talk," Icy eyes soothingly says, hands up in mock surrender. You try to kill him with your eyes.

"He's right. We don't mean any harm, we just want to talk," Blondie from earlier copies him.

"Ms Y/N, we came in here for the assassination of the Strucker family head as well as your brothers' but seeing that they're already dead, we'll do nothing but talk," Wanda came forward to explain.

Your eyes narrow at her, "So you're a double agent? Figured that you were just there for the show with how you looked like."

Wanda looked sheepish for a moment. "We saw our way out of the family's shitty system so we took it. They're the good guys," Pietro shrugged beside her, gesturing at the other 4.

"Don't know who these guys are, so- forgive me if I don't trust them as you do," You shrug back, seriously doubting the good guys comment.

"Natasha Romanoff," The black widow agent introduces herself abruptly, eyes on the blood stains on your flesh and skin.

"Sam Wilson," Wings followed with an arm cross.

"Steve Rogers," Blondie offered with a nod, your eyes widening as you focused entirely on the very dangerous and known man in front of you.

If this guy was Steve Rogers, also known as, funnily enough, 'The Captain' then the man beside him must be-

"James Buchanan Barnes but you can call me Bucky," The mother fucking Winter Soldier winks at you, a playful grin on his face.

You are either very fucking lucky or fucked over at the moment if you didn't play your cards right.

Fin~

✨ Masterlist >> || { next }

[kerubimcrepin]

Liveblog - Dofus, livre 1 : Julith [PART 17]

Julith is not a good person, more news at 11.

My most favourite image of Joris ever. I even made a meme about it a while back.

Once again, I will mention, that looking at whatever Joris feels about Khan through a prism of "Joris has a puberty-fueled celebrity crush on him" makes Khan actually bearable as a character because I can't stop giggling at Joris's reactions to him.

He's like a 12yo girl unleashed upon some random member of BTS she likes the most.

While I understand her not wanting to free the guy who can and WANTS to kill them, it's some stone-cold motherfuckery to leave him to die slowly and painfully under the rocks.

Atcham is literally so prideful he would rather die from being crushed to death, than let somebody help him. Man.

Every single lesson Kerubim has taught him, each little moment, has been leading up to this.

Joris, the boy he likely adopted, at least in part because he was saddened by how things turned out to be with Atcham, has the chance to do what Kerubim never could —

Truly understand Atcham, and become brothers with him, — both in arms, and as a family.

No commentary, he's just some moments of Atcham being pretty (both from this minute, and a bit ahead.)

Joris's batshit insane kindness has him thinking some serious thoughts. Like, what the fuck is even occurring? Is the kid stupid?

Sadly, Joris is about to grow on him. Like mold.

THERE IS SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE. Firstly, it does not escape me that Atcham says this entire line with a smile/a grimace that he is fighting not to turn into a smile with all his might. This is endearing to him.

So, there are multiple possibilities here that can coexist:

Kerubim built saw traps to put Atcham in, when they were kids. (that's when The Darkness began.....)

Kerubim and Atcham had a Cold War of trying to kill one another through Looney Tunes shenanigans.

Atcham has multiple very interesting memories of trying to break into Kerubim's home, only to fall through the floor and get electrocuted. He thought it was very clever before, once again, swearing to kill that furred fuck.

Once again, Joris's kindness and regard both for him, and for others, is baffling. To him, it does not even occur that hurting people is not normal. Like it's just chill.

So far, Joris has proven himself to be both the most unpredictable, and most sane person in the room. He's got Atcham's attention, now...

Also, as we can see, Bakara is using healing magic on Khan! It's nice to see the fact that Huppermages (and, for the record, Ecaflips) are both classes that have some healing magic up their sleeves, though it's not their job, like Eniripsas.

My agenda of Kerubim, Atcham, and Joris (if he is even capable of this spell), regularly swapping roles of attacker, tank, and healer/support between them depending on the situation, is still going strong.

[short-circuit-the-great]

Yeah Zura is the comic relief character but what if he went completely nuts after Shoyo died because that was the final straw. This is a person who already lost his entire family, grew up all alone, found a family again with Shoyo and Gintoki and Takasugi, was afraid to regard them as such because of already losing an entire family, lost it all again when Shoyo was taken away, fought to keep what was left and get Shoyo back so everything could be the same again, and FAILED. On top of that, he watched it get ripped away right in front of him. And he couldn't stop it. Any of it.

So he does dumb shit. He laughs at everything, he laughs at nothing. He's completely straight-faced, he's batshit insane. He takes everything seriously and simultaneously nothing seriously. He wants to destroy the world, he wants to troll it. He has the potential to be incredibly dangerous but it comes out as him being an idiot because maybe if he can be completely wild and stupid it'll make everything hurt a little bit less. Revenge isn't sweet but infiltrating the Shinsengumi headquarters and turning all their toilet paper backwards is at least funny. And funny is the only thing he has left.

Thank you I'll be here all week