#his motto: fuck around and find out bitch

[helluvapoison]

hey there :3 it’s like 5 am here and I’m being plagued with ✨ideas✨

imagine if Adam had a thing for a demon! reader, like it doesn’t matter if they’re hellborn or a sinner or whatever, he can’t muster up any genuine disgust upon seeing them, and he fucking hates it. And the reader’s not too thrilled either because yeah sure he’s hot under the mask but they can’t really say the same for his personality (bonus if the reader has black feathered wings)

pleas and thank you

Hate Heart

Adam x Demon!Reader

He wouldn’t be opposed to a one night stand with someone from Hell (imho) Hit it and quit it, that’s his motto! Feelings though? Christ on a stick, demon or not, that’s something else entirely

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

• Adam can’t fucking stand this game of cat and mouse game that he never signed up to play

• It’s not subtle either because there’s no way for you to accidentally bump into him up in Heaven, he’s always coming to seek you out

• He always thought the itch to see you would subside, that eventually you’d leave his system and become nothing more than a faded memory

• Except he couldn’t seem to forget your face— and trust him, he’s tried just about everything you can think of to speed up that process

• Lute would turn on him in two seconds flat if she knew

• Sera would never let him lead exterminations again, she would scold him for not cutting off the infection before it could fester. Was Lucifer not example enough?

• Her threat to send him to you permanently should have scared him enough but it didn’t. Even though he knew she had a point, he already thought of that!

• You’re from Hell, your very existence is the epitome of everything he should hate and be disgusted by!

• And the sentiment was very much mutual

• Adam took extreme pleasure in killing Hell’s inhabitants (which, wildly, isn’t the biggest red flag about him!?)

• Somehow you were excluded from that category and placed in one all on your own. A tomorrow problem that was repeated daily

• “If you hate me so much maybe you should stop saving me, asshole.”

• “Keep bitching, maybe I will.” He growls back with as much venom as he could muster

• His actions scream the opposite. He’d never. The thought alone twists his heart awkwardly, filling him with urgency to make sure you’re safe rather than do what he came down to do

• Much to your dismay, Adam finds you every couple of months. “To make sure you’re still alive,” he claims, but proceeds to hang around for as long as he can

• It’s exhausting, he’s exhausting

• But then he leaves… and you miss him

[darkeralmond]

Do you write smut for conrad fisher? If you do can you do a jealous conrad x reader? thank you!!

i do now! thank you so much for requesting ILY anon ❤️❤️

WANNA BE YOURS

Conrad Fisher x fem! Reader

summary: You and Conrad were at a party for Belly’s birthday hosted by Nicole. You were stranded by Conrad and notice a guy alone on the couch. You decide to be friendly and talk to him before dancing with him. Conrad and you get into an argument over this until you say the thing he’s been waiting to hear.

warnings: 18+, smut, angry Connie, car sex, penetration, she/her pronouns, arguing, vulgar language, Conrad calling you “good girl”, dirty talk

word count: 1.9k

a/n: connie is a popular guy in my request board 😭, not complaining tho i love him!! thank you again for the request!! P.S. I LOVE ARTIC MONKEYS AND PAXTON H-Y!!!

masterlist | request info

The music was loud in your ears as you entered the crowded living room. Conrad had left you alone to go find out where Steven was, but all the people in one space triggered your claustrophobia.

You looked over and saw a guy sitting by himself on the couch with a look of defeat on his face. There were people dancing all around him while he chugged whatever substance he had in his red solo cup. Usually, you don’t feel sympathy for strangers, but something about this guy made your heart wrench.

You approached him. “You alright?” Sure, it’s weird when a stranger asks others how they’re feeling, but some people need to vent to someone they don’t know.

He looked up at you with red eyes, you couldn’t tell if he was high or if he had been crying. He sniffled, “Yeah, uh, I caught my girl cheating on me with my homeboy upstairs.”

Shit. “Oh,” you replied.

You sat down next to him while he explained, “It’s chill. She was a bitch anyway.” He brought his cart up to his lips and took a hit. He was high. “You wanna hit?” He offered it to you.

You shook your head, “I’m straight edge.”

He furrowed his eyebrows, “The fuck is straight edge?”

You laughed at his reaction. It was the same one every person had when you told them the same answer. “That means I chose to stay sober.” Your thought process was by staying sober, it helped you avoid all the drama that starts when you’re black out drunk. Drunk confessions, drunk fighting, the list goes on. “It just helps me stay out of trouble.”

He exhaled smoke from his lips and nose. “Ohhhh,” he laughed. “Respect.”

“Yeah,” you giggled. You then looked out at everyone dancing and having a good time. “Why don’t we dance?”

He smiled, “Sure.” The two of you got up from the couch and went to the middle of the living room. The Motto by Drake and Lil Wayne played over the speaker, the bass shaking the whole house. Due to all the people crammed in one room, you and the mystery guy danced fairly close to each other. “Hey, what’s your name?” he yelled over the music.

“Y/N!” you shouted back. “What’s yours?”

“Noah!” Noah yelled. You nodded your head while smiling. The two of you danced while screaming the lyrics to the song. “You’re really cool, Y/N! I think we’d make great friends!”

“What do you mean? You’re stuck with me now!” You and him laughed. That’s when you spotted someone familiar pushing through the crowd. It was your boyfriend finally coming back from his search. “Conrad, hey!” You waved. “Did you find Steven?”

He completely ignored your question, his eyes set on the guy who you were dancing with. “Get away from my girl.” He stepped in front of you.

“Woah, man. We weren’t doing anything.” Noah held up his hands defensively.

“Conrad, stop!” you laughed, trying to lighten the mood. “It’s fine! We’re just chilling.”

He scoffed in response, “I recommend staying away from Y/N. We’re going home.”

“Conrad-”

“We’re going home.” He cut in.

He sounded pissed, it made your guy twist as you looked back at Noah. “Sorry about him,” you said with a frown on your face.

“Don’t stress about it, maybe I’ll see you around.” He waved bye as you got dragged out of the house by Conrad.

“What the fuck is your problem?” you yelled as the two of you left the house. “Am I not allowed to make friends now? Why don’t you ever trust me?”

He rolled his eyes, “I trust you! I just don’t trust that guy!”

You yelled, “You don’t even know him!”

“Neither do you! You don’t know what his intentions were, Y/N!” His eyes were wide with anger as he looked into yours, the veins in his neck strained. “Get in the car.” The car beeped as he unlocked the doors.

You didn’t want to cause a scene in front of everyone, so you just did as he said and got in the passenger’s seat. You folded your arms over your chest and stared out the window. He got in the driver’s seat next to you and started the car before putting it into drive mode. “Just so you know, his girlfriend cheated on him and he was by himself,” you mumbled while pouting.

“Y/N,” he said. This gave you a glimpse of hope that he’d finally listen to you, but he then followed it up by, “I don’t fucking care.”

You rolled your eyes and frowned, shaking your head. “You’re a fucking child.” He didn’t say anything, he just kept driving.

The radio quietly played music, the air was tense as you refused to look at him. He stopped the car at a red light. “Y/N, I’m sorry,” he finally spoke up. “I get really insecure, babe, and I just want everyone to know that you’re mine.”

You looked over at him, your expression softened as you said, “Connie, I’m yours.” You placed your hand over his that draped over the shift stick.

He glanced over at you and saw your innocent expression. You knew something instantly changed in him as you noticed his demeanor swiftly change. “Say that again,” he breathed.

Now it clicked. It turned him on to know that you and your body was for him and him only. You batted your lashes and smiled deviously. “I’m all yours, Connie,” you teased.

He stared at you longer, his breath slightly hitched. “Fuck,” he muttered under his breath. When the light turned green, he took a turn that was the opposite way of both your guys’ homes.

“Conrad?” you said, concern present in your voice. “What are you doing?”

“I’m pulling the car over so we can fuck.” Butterflies swarmed in your stomach due to the assertiveness in his voice. He pulled the car over close to the beach where there were no lights except for the car’s headlights. “You fine with that?”

You nodded your head, “Y-Yeah.” You unbuckle your seatbelt and look up at him. Conrad’s hand reached up to the side of your neck and connected his lips with yours.

He was hungry for your kiss touch. He was desperate for his hands to be all over your delicate body. He pushed into you, his tongue slowly licking the seam of your mouth, which led to a more forceful kiss. He gripped the collar of your shirt, pulling you closer.

You broke away and smirked. The anger from the argument earlier melted into lust. He slightly leaned the seat back as you climbed over the center console. You rested on his lap, your legs straddling him. He moaned as you kissed along his jaw line, then his chin before leaning down to his neck and sucking on it.

His fingers dug into your hips and pulled you closer, making sure you could feel his hardening erection against your lower body. “My… job is to make you… mhm… feel good,” he said between moans.

You pulled away, “What? I’m not allowed to be in control?” This won a chuckle out of him. “I’m kidding, go ahead. I already said I’m yours.”

He ran his fingers through your hair while biting his bottom lip. “That’s my good girl,” he husked before locking his lips to your neck.

Your back arched off his lap as he sucked harshly on your pulse point, your breathing became heavy and erratic.

Your hands found their way onto his hair as he continued working his way down your neck. You couldn’t tell who was taking control anymore; the two of you were too busy focusing completely on each other. Your body began reacting.

One of his hands came up to your hip, gripping tightly as another hand traveled to your breast. Both of his hands were touching the fabric of your shirt and caressing the skin underneath. A gasp escaped your lips as your hand found its way to his crotch. Your fingers brushed against his sensitive member, eliciting a moan out of him.

‘You like that, huh?’ you thought to yourself.

He suddenly let go of your breasts and grabbed your face gently with his hands, pulling your lips forcefully to his own. He kissed fiercely, his tongue slipping inside your mouth. He bit your lip causing you to moan, his hands moving from your face down to your ass. He started grinding against you roughly, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your entire body.

A loud moan fell from your lips as you bit your bottom lip. “Connie, just fuck me already,” you pleaded. “Stop edging!”

He chuckled, “You’re still on the pill, right?” You nodded your head eagerly. “Good.” He reached down to his pants which caused you to back up slightly. He unzipped the zipper and pulled down his boxers slightly to reveal his erection. You got up on your knees so you could pull your panties, that were soaked, off. He helped lift your skirt up and slip your panties down your thighs. Once they were off, he threw them to the car floor on the passenger’s side.

Slowly, he inserted himself in you. A gasp escaped out from you while Conrad groaned from the feeling of your warm walls. His thrusting was slow at a steady pace, you felt yourself getting wetter and wetter by the second. He placed one hand on your thigh as his free hand gripped your ass. Your breathing grew shallow as the pressure building in your body increased.

“Oh god,” you whimpered.  “Please! Connie, I need you so bad!”

He continued to work his way into you until he slammed his pelvis against yours causing him to let out a loud grunt. He rasped, “You take me so well.”

As you continued to grind against him, he let out an animalistic growl. “God, Y/N, please,” he panted. You continued to grind against him, he was close, you knew it. You bit your lip, trying to suppress the sounds that were begging to fall from your throat.

His grip on your leg tightened, causing you to cry out as a wave of pleasure that rocked through your whole body. “Connie,” you whined. “Cum for me, baby, cum inside me!”

He pounded faster and harder. You felt your walls tighten around him, squeezing his erection. As he came, you let out the loudest scream anyone has ever heard from you. You clamped your eyes shut and squeezed your thighs around his waist even harder to keep him in you.

After a few seconds you managed to open your eyes. You looked down at him and could see his face twisted in ecstasy, sweat drenched over his forehead. You felt something hot pool in the pit of your stomach. You leaned down to kiss him again before getting off him. You reached for your panties and slid them back on. “You feel better now?”

He nodded his head as he caught his breath. Both your faces were flushed red from the heat of the orgasm. After recovering from his orgasm, he smiled softly. He grabbed your hand and brought you closer to him once more, placing his lips on yours. “We should head back. It’s almost midnight. And I wanna have some fun with you somewhere more comfortable”

You giggled and kissed his cheek.

[obx-pogue4life]

Consequences

Authors Note: Hi everyone :) This one got a little weird but what's new lol I hope you like it. I feel a bit rusty too so please ignore any typos or grammar shit I missed. I'm easing back into writing and I had a lot of fun with this one! Thanks for participating in the poll and please leave me some feedback on if you liked this!

Summary: You hook up with Rafe on a one night stand and leave him while he's getting ready only he finds you and lets you know just how much he doesn't like being ditched like that.

Warnings: Language, dirty talk, hooking up, one night stands, rough play, spanking, cnc, bratty reader, rafe being rafe, a ton more im sure but I can't think of them!

"Shit" you thought to yourself. You were getting a drink at the bar when you spotted him. The guy you hooked up with last night. Rafe Cameron. You chugged your drink and slammed it down on the counter with a crash. "Was this dude following me?" You thought to yourself again. You needed to play it cool because that was just a one time thing. You weren't into starting anything with anyone and just wanted to have fun. That's why you came out tonight, to find your next conquest. Hump 'em and dump 'em was your unofficial motto and you lived for one night stands. You liked to quickly move on to the next, no real feelings involved and no one gets hurt. 

The bartender handed you another drink and you threw this one back giving an exasperated sigh after hoping to catch the attention of the cute guy at the end of the bar. You glanced his way to try and make eye contact with him but instead noticed someone else charging towards you in a rush. You pretended not to notice and quickly turned on your heels and started to walk away towards the exit. You needed to get out of there quickly because of course, Rafe would find you at this bar of all places and of course, he would try and confront you about last night. You knew he wanted you for more than just one night but you still slept with him anyway. You just couldn't walk away from such a sure thing with someone like him. He was drop dead gorgeous but a force to be reckoned with. His hard exterior intrigued you but he never seemed interested in you enough for you to take seriously until yesterday. That's when you made your move and how you ended up in his bed this morning and how you conveniently left while he was cleaning up. 

You ducked down the hallway by the bathrooms and were quickly approaching the back exit but just as you put your hand on the door you felt two strong arms grip your waist and spin you around. "Oh my gosh, Rafe! Hi! What are you doing here?" You tried to play it off cool. "I really need to get going but it was nice to see you" and you leaned in for a quick kiss on the cheek and started to turn around again. You let out a slow breath as you reached for the handle to push again, silently praying that your little fake shocked "oh hi" stunt worked. You walk through the door and let out a sigh of relief only to be startled by the sound of your name falling from Rafe's lusty and angry sounding lips. 

"Don't fucking walk away from me y/n" he says in a harsh but desperate tone. "Why did you fucking leave like that this morning?"

"I...umm..." you fumbled with your words for a minute but quickly got it together. You faced him now and took in your scenery around you. It was your classic back alley way. A narrow brick wall lining each side of you, random graffiti spray painted in various places, old cardboard boxes and a dumpster by the door you just came out of.  "Y/N!" Rafe said sterenly. "Come on, what fucking gives?" 

You gave him your best smile and reach out to touch his cheek. "You know what they say Rafey, always leave 'em wanting more..." you trail off trying to turn and leave again. His hand catching your arm before you could escape. 

"So that's it? That's how it's gonna be?" You shrug your shoulders and give him an unamused smirk. 

"Fuck, you're such a bitch y/n" he said running his hand over the top of his head. "You played me and for what? Dinner? A place to sleep? A decent fuck? I don't get it, I really liked you and I thought you felt the same. It took a lot for me to even go out last night and when I saw you were alone for once, I decided to shoot my shot" 

"I don't know what to say Rafe" you say annoyed. I really need to go tho-" but he yanks your arm hard and cut you off. 

"Oh you're not going anywhere yet" he says angrily. You roll your eyes at him and try to shove him off. "Let go of me, you asshole" you shout. 

"I am not the asshole in this situation y/n. You are and I think it's about time someone taught you a lesson. Tell me y/n, do you do this to all your dates or am I just the lucky one" he questions, sounding hurt but slightly amused. You stayed completely silent but roll your eyes at him again. You can see his one hand clench into a fist and feel the other tighten his grip on you even more. "I swear to God if you roll your eyes at me one more fucking time, you're gonna regret it. Stop being such a disrespectful cunt." 

You smirked at him completely intrigued by his outrage and let out a muffled giggle. "Oh yeah Rafey, what are you gonna do out here to me? Yell at me? Call me names? Your such a blowhard, just let me go you asshole so we can both move on. Let me go or you're gonna be the one whose fucking sorry," you spat out. 

Suddenly a look of complete abandon comes  over Rafe's face as he gives you a creepy unhinged smile. His eyes go black and he cocks his head to the side and takes a step closer to you, removing any inch of distance between you. "Is that a threat?" He asks grabbing your other arm and pushing you into the brick wall next to the dumpster. He was so close you could feel his pulsating, bulging cock through his pants. Smiling to yourself you think "maybe I could get into this, like finally a guy that's full of surprises" and you shake your head and take a deep breath in and let it out slowly, looking into his eyes as he brings your hands over your head and pushes them into the hard bricks. It kind of hurts but you like it. "Maybe I misjudged you..." you said outloud. 

"Maybe you did...he answers  you and starts kissing your neck. 

He hoisted you up a little against the wall and in a fever of rushed kisses and animalistic grunting you were getting so turned on and so wet it was starting to pool between your legs. He sucked on a particularly sensitive spot on your neck and you moaned his name so loud you could feel him immediately smirk into your neck. He ran his tongue over the shell of your ear and started sucking and nibbling on your ear lobe, a spot he found last night that drove you wild. He had his knee in between your legs helping hold you up and you were shamelessly humping and riding his thigh when he abruptly stopped and let you down with a thud. You didn't even have time to think before he put your hands over your head again and said "close your eyes and don't you dare fucking move." 

Against all your instincts and better judgement you let your excitement take over and did exactly as you were told. Next thing you knew, your dress was being ripped down the middle and thrown from your body. "Rafe! What the hell" you started to yell and go towards the ruined material only to feel him shove you hard up against the bricks again, scraping your bare skin and prickling at your delicate flesh. "Ow! "That hurts, you dick," you yell at him. "Deal with it" he said nonchalantly. You roll your eyes at his glib attitude. "You're such a prick. You ruined my dress! How am I supposed to get home with no clothes?!" you shouted furiously. 

"Who says you're going home right now?" he growled back at you with a question. "And how was I supposed to know that you weren't wearing any underwear" he said smirking. "Who knew you were such a little hoe" he laughed. You're bare pussy and exposed tits we're on full display for him and anyone who ventured into the alleyway. "Lighten up y/n we're just messing around, it'll be fine, just relax" he said taking off his button down. "You can use this later but only if you take your punishment like a good girl. I can see it going both ways actually because something tells me you don't take orders very well. I told you not to roll your eyes at me and you just couldn't help yourself. This is your fault. These are the consequences of your actions. 

He grabbed you harshly by your arm and spun you around to face the brick wall. Kicking both your feet to the sides, he roughly feels you up over your ass and his fingertips graze your soaking pussy. "Don't move" he says coldly. You couldn't believe how turned on you were considering you were in a pretty rough spot but it was so thrilling that you couldn't help but be turned on. Smiling to yourself you look over your shoulder and lock eyes with Rafe. "Did I tell you, you could turn around? He says angrily. 

"No," you say in a pouty voice. Two can play this game and if he wants to do this then it might as well be entertaining, you thought to yourself. 

"Turn around, put your hands on the wall and lean forward like a good girl for once in your fucking life" he says. You do as your told and feel his hands caress the smooth skin of your ass. He cups your cheeks and jiggles them a little and you love how good his hands feel on your aching and needy body. His fingers move their way to your aching core and he lightly traces your dripping folds, teasing you. You moan out in pleasure and he stops immediately. "You enjoying this y/n?" He asks and you nod your head and instantly say yes. He gives you three hard smacks on your bottom and then grips your ass cheeks again harshly. "I don't think you're ready..." he trails off. 

"I'm ready!" You say quickly and instantly regret it when you hear him darkly chuckle. "Oh you silly little slut," he chuckles menacingly. "You're no where near ready but that's ok. You want it, you've got it," he says ominously. 

His finger quickly find your puckering hole and make its way inside you, roughly and without caution. You squirm uncomfortably but don't move. "Mmmm good girl" he praises. "Let's add another finger." 

Quickly he adds a second and then a third. You have tears streaming down your face but at the same time it feels so good you can't help but let out a pleasurable moan. You can tell your body is about to give in even more when he abruptly stops and pulls his fingers out. "You like this don't you y/n?" You could feel the breeze against your bare and exposed flesh and it makes you shiver. "Yes" you said quietly. "I thought so, such a little whore for me, outside, naked and bent over" he gloats. "Now...you're ready." 

With your hands still on the wall you hear him undo his pants and you mentally prepare for his cock. He is so big and not in the way that most guys think they are. He was actually huge, longest and thickest cock you'd ever laid eyes on. He looks unreal. Most definitely not the norm and most definitely well above average. You wiggle your ass towards him eager to feel him inside you. "You want this cock again y/n?" He asks you. "Fuck yes. Pleaseeee Rafe" you say wiggling your ass at him again. You can hear him fiddling with his belt buckle and then suddenly you feel a hard and painful smack on your ass. "Shit! What the hell Rafe!" you shriek. He yanks you back by your hair and whispers in your ear. "Count with me to 10 or I'll keep going until you do" he growls, nibbling your ear just a tad before harshly shoving your head back towards the wall. "Raf-" you were cut off by a swift smack from his belt. "Fuck" you say, tears coming to your eyes." 

"Y/n" he said testily. He hits your ass again, harder this time. You yelped out in pain but quickly say "one" and swallow it down. "That's a good girl, keep going" he says coldly. Over and over again, he spanks you with his belt. Your ass is on fire and you are full on crying in the alleyway but there is not a sole in sight. Your tortured cries are blending in with the booming music from behind the closed door you came out of earlier. No one can hear you. 

"Nine" you cry out, shaking and crying so badly you don't think you can take another smack from him. You can feel the welts forming. It feels horrible but a small part of you is enjoying it. "Last one y/n and then we're done. You ready?" You sniffle and sigh but shake your head and say yes. He swats you the hardest yet as you sob out "ten" to his complete enjoyment and pure satisfaction. 

"Turn around and look at me y/n" he says harshly. You reluctantly turn around to face him and all you see is a blank and eerie expression. If you didn't know better you would almost think he looks sad. "Your actions have consequences. Everything you do, everyone you play, has to deal with the repercussions of your selfish bull shit. You act like a whore, you get treated like a whore. It's as simple as that.  Don't mess with peoples emotions. It WILL catch up to you. You act like trash, you get treated like trash. 

"Is that so" you challenge, reaching for his button down. He quickly moves it away and places it on top of the dumpster next to you. He takes a step closer to you and moves a piece of hair out of your eyes and tucks it behind your ear. Looking up at him your legs buckle a bit and he catches you and sits you on top of his shirt on the dumpster lid. The dumpster has two lids on it and the one on the other side of where you sit was open. "This is gross, help me back down, I'll be ok to stand" you say peering over, completely disgusted. 

"Oh I don't really give a fuck if you can stand or not y/n" he says shooting daggers at you with his eyes. 

"What are you talking about, why am I sitting up here then? Help me down Rafe, come on" you plead. 

"No" he says simply and starts walking over to where your ripped dress is on the ground. He picks it up and tosses it into the open end of the dumpster. "Hey! My dress! What are you doing?" You shout. 

"I told you, you act like trash, you get treated like trash and that extends to your belongings too y/n." 

"You're such a dick, you know that? You spit at him. 

"Well...since you already think so..." he says walking back over to you and giving his shirt your body is sitting on a few hard yanks. He frees his shirt, you tumble into the open dumpster and see the outline of his body walking away from you, back towards the door of the club. "RAFE CAMERON WHAT THE FUCK" you scream! He turns around one last time and takes a few steps back towards you and sighs. "I told you y/n, you act like trash, you get treated like trash. End of story" he shrugs, tossing you his button down and his belt. I think you can make these work so you can get home without getting arrested...he trails off, walking away. You didn't have any snappy comeback or harsh words to say to him. You watch him walk away without looking back and when the door slams closed, all you can do is look around and shout "fuck" into the emptiness.

Thanks so much for reading! I appreciate it and I hope you enjoyed! Feel free to reblog, like and/or leave a comment! 🩵🩵🩵

[cevansbrat0007]

Night Routines

Summary: You get a little creative helping Andy with his nightly skincare routine.

Warnings: Smut, Hand Job, Cursing, Fingering (mentioned), Fun with Lotion, Minors DNI

A/N: Written for @writer84. Part of my ongoing Growing Pains Series. Partially written on my phone, so all mistakes are my own. Comments, likes, and reblogs are always appreciated. Thanks for reading!

__

Steam fills the bathroom, temporarily clouding your vision when you and your man finally emerge from the shower. Andy secures a towel around his waist before holding out one to you, which you readily accept. With a chuckle, he hauls your small frame against his hard body, his damp chest hair tickling your bare skin.

"Be good." You playfully scold, rising on your tiptoes so that you can gently peck his soft, full lips. Once. Twice.

"I thought I was." He growls as his big hands find your ass, palming your cheeks. “At least that’s what you kept screaming in the shower a few minutes ago.”

“Oh my God.” You mumble, rolling your eyes before trying to pull away. “Stop it.”

“Why?” Andy slowly walks you backwards toward the bathroom sink. “I distinctly recall you saying it over and over again while I was busy finger fucking my little pussy.”

“I - I, um…” You stammer out, trying to find the right words. Which was unusually hard since you were still coming down from the amazing orgasm he’d just wrung from you. 

“You, err, um, what?” He teases, leaning down to trail his wicked tongue along the curve of your throat. “What’s got my baby tripping over her words like this? Too many orgasms, or not enough?”

Oh, definitely the second one.

“Not enough.” You whisper, feeling your cheeks burn as your teeth go to nibble at your bottom lip. “It’s never enough with you.” 

Andy lifts you then, making you gasp, as he sets you on the vanity. You watch as his eyes darken, before his arms go to position themselves on either side of you - caging you in. It never failed to turn you on when he used his powerful body to demonstrate just how big he was compared to you.

Whether it was simply picking you up to move you out of the way or carrying you around the house, you were always aware of his superior strength. And, oh God, when the man decided he was in the mood to wrestle...

The thought itself is enough to have you squeezing your thighs together.

“You telling me the truth, little one?” One finger finds its way under your chin, forcing you to hold his gaze.

“Uh huh. And I want more.” You breathe as your heartbeat quickens in your chest. “I just need to finish getting ready for bed first. Wanna help me?” Your man nods eagerly, his expression letting you know that he is practically putty in your hands right now.

Ask and you shall receive. That definitely seemed to be Andrew Barber’s motto, both in and out of the bedroom.

“Hand me my lotion, please. I need that red jar right over there.” You point to a spot located just behind him. 

“Anything to get my greedy girl ready for bed.” He murmurs before turning to follow your instructions. As soon as he does, your hand snakes out to grab at his towel, giving it a sharp yank.

Not that it fazes him any. Now standing there stark naked and proud, he makes a show of bending over to fetch the item you requested.

Fuck, you wanted to take a bite out of that fine ass.

Andy returns to you then, handing over the tub before resuming his previous position in front of you. You knew that he loved watching you apply your favorite lotions and creams all over your skin. Sometimes he even sweetly offered to help - which usually made the entire process take much, much longer than it actually should.

But, what your man didn’t know was that you were about to use this opportunity as a teaching moment. You were going to gently remind him that even the district attorney for the City of Boston could stand to use a quality moisturizer now and again.

Dry skin was a bitch no matter who you were. 

Graciously accepting the proffered offering, you twist off the lid before giving it to him to hold. 

“You know why I love this one as much as I do, Andy Bear?” You ask as you begin smoothing the lightly scented cream over your arms. 

“Because it makes you smell absolutely delectable?” Andy purrs, leaning down to nip at your jaw. “Hurry up and finish getting ready, baby. You’ve got me so hard I’m afraid I’m about to pull something.”

You’re briefly distracted from your task long enough to confirm that he is, in fact, serious. And very, very hard. Your wide eyes fixate on your Big Man’s impressive cock as a bead of precum wells up, dotting the tip of the swollen mushroom head. 

And fuck if the sight doesn’t make your mouth water.

“No…” You try again, shaking your head as you attempt to refocus. “Because it leaves my skin feeling so soft and silky smooth. Why else do you think you have such a hard time keeping your hands off me honey?”

“Because I’m fucking addicted to you?” He muses before taking your lips in a hot, open-mouthed kiss. “Because I love the feel of you in my arms?” Another kiss, coupled with a sensual flick of his tongue. “Because my girl’s got a pussy that grips me like a fucking vice? I dunno, take your fucking pick.” 

“Okay, okay.” You plant a hand on his chest to stave off his advances. “Maybe so, but the point I was trying to make was that I think you might be able to use some of this too.” Clearly only half listening, Andy’s head dips again in an effort to recapture your lips.

“Pay attention, Andrew!” You squeal, wanting him to understand. Which was hard to do when you were also busy dodging him at the same time. “This one right here contains a serum that promotes skin elasticity and –”

Still not listening, his hands go to remove your towel. Which, in all honesty, was probably his way of helping you along. He slowly slides it down your body to reveal the bare flesh beneath as the cool air makes your nipples pebble.

“Oh, I am, Y/N. Very, very close attention.”

He lifts your left breast, hefting the tempting weight in his palm. His thumb moves to trace a circle around your sensitive areola, sending sparks coursing through you from head to toe. And then you watch as his luscious mouth slowly begins to descend so that he can –

Okay, no. Focus girl!

“Thank you, honey.” Giggling, you go to slide off the edge of the sink. At this point, trying to educate your man about the importance of having a proper skincare regimen was kind of a lost cause. “But something tells me that you’re just not hearing me.”

“C’mon, baby girl.” Andy groans, before poking out his bottom lip. Your handsome man was so cute whenever he resorted to pouting. “Just let me have you. Wanna bury myself between your thighs so I can taste all that sweetness you promised me this morning” He goes to grab your hips, prompting you to dance away as you move behind him. 

Sporting a devilish grin, you dip your fingers into the fresh smelling cream. You take a moment to rub it between your hands before reaching around to slather it across Andrew’s taut abs. Closing your eyes, you let yourself enjoy the way his muscles bunch and flex beneath your gentle ministrations. 

“Doesn’t that feel good?” You ask, silently noting the catch in his throat as your wandering hands skim lower. “Men need lotion too, you know. Can’t have my beautiful Andy Bear out in these streets looking ashy.” 

You crack open an eye as you reach for more cream. “I asked you a question, baby boy.” You remind him as your voice drops to a sultry purr. “Answer me, please.” He lets out sharp intake of breath when you wrap a slippery hand around his shaft, leisurely pumping his thick length up and down. 

“Fuck, sweetheart!” He grunts, his shoulders hunching as you continue to work him. “Ah, goddamnit! Don't -"

Don't stop? Wouldn’t dream of it.

Twisting your wrist with practiced ease, you swirl the pad of your thumb across his now weeping crown. It blends easily with the creamy slickness of the lotion, only adding to the fluidity of your strokes. 

“You feel so good in my hands, Andy. Don’t you think?” You love the way his big body shudders as you continue to play with him. It’s not often that you got to be in control with this man, so when it did happen, you had to take full advantage.

Especially when that man happened to be Bad Boy of Boston.

“Uh huh.” Comes another grunt, this one sounding more pained than the first. “I - I wanna cum inside you, baby girl.” 

“Mm…” You hum as your other hand goes to cup his heavy sac. “But I wanna see you cum like this.” 

He slams his fist down on the counter as you continue to fondle his balls while jerking his cock. You can practically feel him pulsing beneath your hand, letting you know just how close he is to release.

How desperate.

“Wanna watch you cum all over my hand.” You increase the pace, taking pleasure in the fact you were the one making Andrew Barber come apart at the seams. “Wanna know you’ll remember to lotion up after each and every shower.” 

He cries out when you sink your teeth into the blade of his shoulder, before trailing a line of kisses down the curve of his spine. 

“Ah, god! Yes!” Andy’s hips move to match the rhythm you’ve set, his ardent thrusts now timed with the intimate motion of your hand. “If you don’t stop I’m gonna – gonna – fuck!”

“Do it, baby” You hiss. “Cum for me, Andrew.” Knowing that he’s beyond close, you change tactics so that you can play with his perineum, using your nails to lightly tease the sensitive spot just behind his sac.

A heated blush fans its way across his broad chest and back, his entire body beginning to shake as he approaches his impending orgasm. 

“Open your eyes and give it to me, baby boy.” You urge, eager to witness his explosion. “Want it all.” 

Another fevered stroke, followed by a skilled flick of your wrist is all it takes to send Andy tumbling over the edge. Throwing his head back, a feral groan escapes his throat as the trembling takes over. His angry cock spasms in your grip as thick ropes of hot, white hot cum hit your hand before splashing onto the surface below. 

But you don’t stop, oh no. You keep going, determined to milk every single drop from him as his big body continues to shudder his way through his incredible orgasm. 

Nuzzling his shoulder, you lean around him to rinse off your hands before drying them on a nearby hand towel. 

“Don’t you feel better, Big Man?” You coo as you return to the task of quickly applying lotion to the rest of his tempting physique. “Now that we’ve soothed all of that gorgeous, thirsty skin?”Only when you’re done do you allow yourself to step back and admire your handiwork.

All of it.

A growl rumbles deep in his chest as he turns to peer back at you. You had no doubt that you had awoken the beast within. Even now as he stands there recovering, you already knew that he was in the midst of plotting his revenge. 

“Swear to God, as soon as I get the feeling back in my legs I’m gonna wear you out.” The force of his snarled promise has you taking a small step towards the door. A dark chuckle leaves his lips as he scrubs a hand across his face. "Oh, sweetness, the things I'm gonna do to you..."

“Sure you will, honey.” You respond with a nonchalant shrug. He quirks a brow in your direction, letting you know that he isn't overly fond of your tone. “Just be sure to clean up your mess first.” 

You toss the soiled towel at him before pinching his ass and darting out of the bathroom in search of refuge. Because while you couldn’t be sure that your lesson was effective...

Your man now knew just how committed you were to helping him develop a proper fucking night routine. 

Lucky bastard.

END

[hyunsuks-beanie]

Not a Man of Patience

Pairing: Yeonjun x afab! reader

Genre: Smut

Content Warnings: Smut; dirty talk; pussy eating; piv; unprotected sex; overstimulation 

Word Count: 2k words

Mellow speaks: Okay so I'm asking y'all this. Why the fuck is it always this bitch? Why is it always Choi Yeonjun who leaves me this hot and this bothered? At first I thought I was gonna get stuck at a little over 600 words, and a few hours later, here we are at 2k lol.

Tagging: @sweethyuka @yedammi @enhacolor @axartia @hyunsuksmygod  @duolingofanaccount @zurimochi 

You had it coming, honestly. It was something you could tell the moment he had gazed at you in the crowd, his eyes lingering on you just a second longer than needed. Even then, when the concert had only barely started, those eyes still held a mischief that you could have seen from miles away. Yeah, it was coming, and you knew it. 

Even when he had stepped of the stage at long last, body covered in a sheen of sweat and chest heaving proudly at a job done well, the smirk on his face was enough to tell you he had still got plenty of tricks up his sleeve, and when he had met you backstage, lips reaching down to catch your own in a kiss that had started gentle but turned heated right there, in public, you knew you were on the right track.

Choi Yeonjun had never been a man known for being one with much patience. Nope, he believed in living hard and living fast, there was no time for dilly-dallying. His motto? You want it, you take it. It was especially true when it came to things like the joys and pleasures of life. Pleasures, like the thrill he felt while performing, screaming his lungs out into that mic labeled 'YJ.' Pleasures, the kind he planned on seeking tonight, with you in his arms, pressed against him. 

The car ride back home was.....difficult to say the least. Because how else would you describe it when you could feel wetness growing between your thighs at the way he kept stroking your leg, his hand occasionally dipping under the short hem of your skirt, inching dangerously close to where you needed him the most. The tension was thick, so thick you could cut it with a knife, and the stolen glances and conspicuous lip bites threatened to make you moan. 

After what truly was an eternity, the familiar building of where your shared apartment resided came into view, and the moments leading up to your entry past the equally familiar front door and into your living room went by in nothing less than a blur. Yeonjun was quick with his moves and firm in his intentions, his fingers getting wrapped around your wrist the moment you were done taking your heels off, his touch hot against your skin as he slammed you against the wood of that very door.

And that brings you to now, your lips getting swollen by the second and your breathing becoming ragged just as fast as he kisses you like his life depends on it. Because tonight, it probably does. He seems.....different, and it's a different that leaves you begging for more. He's not nearly as playful as he usually is, and his teasing ways have been replaced by a more aggressive stance as he grips your chin with one hand, his other digging into your hips as he parts your lips expertly.

His tongue is quick to flick into your mouth, exploring every inch as his chest presses flat against yours, his heart beating next to your own as his knee forces your thighs apart, getting wedged between them. He barely gives you time to adjust, gasps and moans being the only sounds you can manage as his hands grope at every inch of skin they can find. And lucky for him, there's quite a few inches to find.

You can tell he's still reeling from the adrenaline rush, the cheers and the music still echoing in his ears, and it's up to you now to moan even louder than those sounds, and become the only thing he can hear. His fingers are nimble but assertive as they tear away at the fabric of your outfit, wanting to feel as close to you as he can. As close as you'll have him. Eyes blown out, hair disheveled, and lips smeared with the gloss that belongs to you, he's the hottest mess you've seen, and it takes everything in you to keep the wetness at bay. 

Not for long, of course, because once again, Choi Yeonjun is not a patient man. Your skirt and that flimsy little top are nothing but a pathetic excuse at keeping you covered up, and he decides he wants to make things easy for you and take away your reason for keeping them on your body. "Such a tease, hoping I'd bang you inside the changing room, huh?," he growls in your ear, one hand inching towards the waistband of your panties while the other pulls your bra down, his lips getting wrapped around your bud as he begins sucking. Maybe it's his words or maybe it's the way he runs a stripe up your clothed heat. Whatever it is, it leaves you breathless, your back arching against the door as you silently plead for more. 

And it makes him chuckle darkly, his teeth digging into your nipple before he's pulling away with a pop, a "So damn needy" escaping him as he pushes the fabric to the side, stroking your pussy softly to prep you up. But he doesn't have to do that for long, because with the way that tank top sticks to his figure, and the way his leather pants seem too tight all of a sudden already has you soaking and sopping, causing him to quirk an eyebrow.

He doesn't really say anything, choosing to simply smirk as he rolls his eyes at you, making it seem as if you're the needy one. Quick to drop to his knees, you get to know just how different he is tonight when he can't even seem to wait long enough for you to take your underwear off. No, he's much too eager to devour you, and it's evident from how quickly he tears the fabric off, leaving you exposed enough for his mouth to latch onto. 

So that's what he does, his tongue pushing through your puffy lips as he makes out with your folds, arms wrapping around your hips and nails digging into the flesh of your butt. It's like he's afraid to let go, wanting to commit every single contour of your cunt to memory as he moans against you, feeling himself grow weak at how good you taste. He's eaten you out more times than he can count, but even now, he can't help being surprised at how sweet you are. Or maybe it's just that he's addicted, aware of the fact that you're the most sinful pleasure he's ever indulged in.

He's slow at first, but it doesn't really take him long to pick the pace up, his teeth grazing across your bundle of nerves and making you whimper in response. He knows every inch of you like the back of his hand, so it's really no surprise that within mere moments, all you're reduced to is a whining mess, legs shaking and eyes rolled to the back of your head as you yank at his silky hair. 

You don't know how long he continues to indulge in his carnal desires. It could have been barely a minute of him ruining your pussy, or it could have been hours of slow, almost lazy teasing. Whatever it is, the end result is the same, with your knees buckling under you and and a scream emanating from inside your chest. White hot pleasure is all you can feel, your dam breaking as you spurt your juices right into his mouth, and he eats you up like a man starved, lapping up every drop before pulling away and wiping his lips, clearly drunk off you.

You're at your limit, all you mind is screaming at you to do is curl up against him and go to dreamland. But you know he has other things on his mind, and you'd be lying if you said your body isn't screaming even louder for him to put those things to practical use. Yeah, you want him to use you for letting his own nerves loose, you want to be of use to him.

And it seems like you're in luck, because as always, he somehow knows just want you want, just what you need. "You want me to fuck you stupid, huh?," he giggles, almost childishly, enjoying having the upper hand as he takes in the way you moan and tug at his hand. He doesn't even wait long enough to take his pants off, choosing to simply roll them down his thighs enough to make his cock spring out, and you can only thank the heavens he wasn't wearing a pair of boxers.

His tip slaps against the vest which now clings to him thanks to all the sweat, and it takes everything in you not to swoon at the sight. Though of course, the way you gulp doesn't go unnoticed by him, and the way he quirks his eyebrow again leaves you nervous for no more than ten seconds, because by the tenth second, he's got your leg wrapped around his waist, his tip teasing your folds as he digs his teeth into your neck, sucking on your skin. "Mine," he mumbles, and the next thing you know, he's pushing all the way into you, driving himself in to the hilt. 

You hiss softly at the suddenness, but the transient pain soon gives way to a lasting throb of pleasure as he bottoms out. "So....tight," he grunts, rolling his hips against yours, rutting into you as he begins setting up a pace. His moves are urgent, his thrusts needy as he fills you up with himself, groaning and moaning in time with you. The adrenaline is what keeps him going, telling him to absolutely wreck that pretty little pussy and claim that pretty little body. Because it's his to play with anyway, right?

Your walls clench around his thickness, his girth being something you'll never quite get used to. Your nails claw into his arms, your moans carrying through the air as you whimper for him to move faster. And he complies, because who is he to deny you the pleasure you seek? His pumps grow more desperate his hickies pierce deeper, his needs getting the better of him as he keeps thrusting, wanting to see you crumble before his eyes.

He's so fast it almost feels like he's going to tear your insides apart, and all you can think of is to thank him for it. Actually, scratch that. Thanking him is the only thing you know, because you seem to have lost all ability to think otherwise. You cum all over his length, but you can't tell if it's your second climax of the night or your tenth. Maybe it's somewhere in between, but you can't be bothered enough to ask. All you can focus on is the addictive pleasure coursing through your veins and overwhelming your senses. Somewhere through the night, you're begging him to fill you up with his seed, to let you take every drop in before you almost collapse. He tries to resist, tries to last even longer, but in the end, you're far too warm to not shoot white ropes of his cum into. 

It takes you a moment to realize he's finally reached his limit too, and it takes even longer for him to stop thrusting, that's how focused he's been on the task at hand. That's part of the reason you love him so much, because he gives it his all, even if all he's doing is fucking you senseless. It just makes him all the more hot, and you? All the more wet. 

His chest heaving as he comes down from his high, he gives you one of the best kisses he ever has, telling you how much he loves you and thanking you for calming his bubbling energy down. But if you thought he was done, I'm sorry to say you're in for a ride. Because if Choi Yeonjun isn't known for being a man of patience, one thing he is known for being is never backing down from a challenge. 

[hardstraykidshours]

skz as mafia members

pairing: none, just ot8 stray kids

genre: mafia au, headcanon, kinda smut?, 18+ (minors dni)

length: 380

warnings: profanity, sexual/suggestive content, mature themes, violence, crime, 18+ (minors dni)

chan

the right hand man. he’s going to be doing all the work that comes with being a mafia leader, but he’s getting none of the credit/praise. all of jeongin's ideas are really out of pocket, so he works hard to make them at least somewhat feasible. always the best leader even when he’s not technically in charge.

minho

the enforcer. he’s going out to do all the missions, and he has a 100% success rate. he’s always going to be fucking a hot stranger after a successful mission as a personal reward for doing well. lives by the fuck bitches get money motto (but in the opposite order) 

changbin

the body guard. he’s jeongin’s personal bodyguard and protector. he doesn't have all those muscles for nothing. constantly working because of all the stupid shit mr. maknae on top is doing because he thinks he's untouchable.

hyunjin

the negotiator. he’s minho’s mission partner. minho is going in first and doing all the dirty work and then hyunjin is stepping in for negotiations. low key master manipulator and excellent liar. he is always going to be getting the much better end of any deal.

jisung

the hacker. veryyyyyyy tech savvy. if it involves electronics, he's your guy. can and will find any information no matter how protected or encrypted it is. has a side gig where he hacks into people’s partners’ phones to find out if they’re cheating.

felix

the bait. he joins the mafia by accident only to be immediately used as bait for a rival mafia and is killed. both mafias end up making a temporary truce, so they can all attend his funeral because everyone low key feels bad about it.

seungmin

the alchemist. poisons and bombs are his niche. he has an entire recipe book dedicated to each. has an extra special recipe for a maltov cocktail that can take out an entire city block. if he ever offers you a drink, always refuse. 

jeongin

the leader. of course maknae on top is the leader of the mafia. but, he's literally not doing anything. will just sit around and tell everyone else what he wants done and when he wants it. he is not about to get his own hands dirty.

[glitter-lisp]

Au game but I’m making you au your fandom into mine — give me a tangled dragon rider au (doesn’t have to Napoleonic wars related bc I’m a nice person)

jaylia this is so funny because literally in the last chapter of multiverse i sent them to a dragon rider world specifically with you in mind omg okay so this is less of a 5 fun facts and more of 1 setting and 4 character sketches ok SO

think typical high fantasy there are Kingdoms and the the Kingdoms have Magic and also some of the Kingdoms have Dragons and and the Dragons have Dragonriders and when a newborn Dragon picks a human to be their Dragonrider they are shipped off to a multination Dragon School Up In The Mountains To Learn How To Do It also worth noting for this world im stealing the eragon thing that dragons can choose their riders from inside the egg so if you touch a dragon egg sometimes that bitch will hatch on the spot for you and oops now you gotta deal with that. so anyways our cast of character in the ya novel i am dubbing the dragon thief:

hugo. the eponymous dragon thief. part of a thieves guild, stole a dragon egg in transport to sell to the highest bidder because that shit is EXPENSIVE if the sale went through he'd be set for life, except oh holy shit what the fuck it fucking HATCHED, and since dragon bonds are considered sacred across all nations (dragons are too Wise to choose random shitheels obviously) he's immediately pardoned of all crimes and shipped off to dragon school with his hatchling, but being pardoned of your crimes doesn't mean your fellow trainees have forgotten them and everyone at the school knows you once tried to kidnap and sell the baby dragon that is now bonded to you for life, and they treat you accordingly

nuru, a young princess who's descended from a long line of both nobility and dragonriders, but always like, yknow. the eldest daughters. the only-kind-of-joking family motto is "first on the throne, second in the saddle" and nuru is the fourth child so the best she could hope for was a decent dowry and a husband who let her keep studying astronomy, but then at her family's hatching ceremony the hatchling stumbled out of its egg and trotted right past all of nurus sisters and into her arms, so now her family is furious even though she really, really, really didn't mean to buck tradition and steal her sister's dragon, and all of her sister's friends who expected her there after the egg hatched are instead stuck with her pesky baby sister instead

yong. tiny baby child whose parents are trainers at the school, and was therefore raised on the property, and was therefore raised as much by dragons as people. is accidentally EXTREMELY magical by virtue of growing up around so much magical energy. his parents keep him the fuck away from any eggs because of that, for fear of him accidentally pulling an unhatched dragon into a bond because of his power instead of the dragon actually wanting to bond with him as a person. yong somehow manages to find, befriend, and bond with a young wild dragon ("young" by dragon standards at least) instead, leaving him half a decade younger than his mostly teenage and young adult classmates, and his dragon close to a century older than their hatchlings

varian. the first dragonrider trainee from his kingdom invited to study at the school. At least, the first in close to 30 years, since his uncle the king and his dragon were both defeated in battle a few years ago after waging war on the rest of the world for a quarter of a century. edmund is gone and his son eugene, varians older cousin, is doing what he can to fix the wreck of his own kingdom, make amends with their neighboring kingdoms, and restart the dragonrider corps in the dark kingdom, since edmund demanded all other dragons and riders be banished a few decades ago. varian never had anything to do with the war, never fought in it and barely knew his uncle or his dragon, but that doesn't stop people from treating him and his dragon like they're also going to go insane and start murdering people any second

soooooo yeah that's all i got band of misfits at magic school sticking together because everyone else hates them so they might as well

[themadsquirrel09]

Find you ☆ Chapter 2

👉 Click here to go to chapter 1! 🌌

👉 On AO3 chapter 5 is already out 👽

Fandom ☆ South Park

Ships ☆ KenMan ♡ KenEric (Eric Cartman x Kenny McCormick), Clybe (Bebe StevensxClyde Donovan) and Creek (Tweek TweakxCraig Tucker). There might be some glimpses of other ships.

Characters ☆ Kenny McCormick, Eric Cartman, Tweek Tweak.

Rating ☆ M

Warnings ☆ Swearing, violence, fluffiness. They are aged up here. It starts when they are 14 but happens mostly when they are 18, at the last year of school. 

Chapter summary ☆ At school, Kenny isn't feeling so good and Tweek stays with him. At night, he gets an unexpected call.

☆ 1013 words ☆

With love: (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Stan

I have the first class with Tweek, which is nice because we have become close with the years.

“Hey man, are you feeling better?” He asks as the teacher goes on about who knows what.

“Not really, I feel worse… but don't say a word to Kyle!” He shakes a little harder than usual.

“You know I won't!”

“Yeah, sorry. It's just that I hate it when he tells me what to do.”

“I know, hanging out with him can be way too much pressure.” I smile. Fine choice of words. “Don't you want to go to the infirmary?”

“I'll be fine! What's your next class?”

“Chemist.”

“Oh… I have English. See you at lunch, then.” I walk away, but he catches up to me.

“I’ll just skip that, man. You don’t look so good.” We end up going to Stark's pond.

“Are you sure about this, isn’t it too much pressure?” I say, mocking his motto, he flips me off and I snort. It is still funny that he got that from Craig.

“This is better than school.” Says Tweek, looking at the nature.

“Damn right,” I lay down. “I’ll try to sleep, maybe that’s all I need.” Tweek takes a sweater out of his backpack and puts it over me.

“Aww, that’s sweet man. Thank you for staying with me,” He smiles at me. “If Craig ever gets too stupid, dump him and choose me instead.” I wink at him and he looks nervous for a second, just before he remembers I like to tease him like that.

“If you can joke around, then I guess you are not feeling that bad, right?” I feel like shit, but joking around cheers me up a bit. I sleep for a couple of hours, until it starts getting too cold, so we go home. If I’m lucky, no one will be around.

When I get there, I get a call from Cartman. That’s weird, he usually just texts or sends endless voice messages.

“How is it going?”

“Everything is so shitty today I want to kick myself in the nuts,” I laugh. He has his unique way to curse and I have grown fond of it. “But whatever, whatever! Soon it will be different. You’ll see, Kenny.”

“Oh, yeah?” But lately it feels like everything is out of control. Maybe it always was. “How so?”

“Don’t be an asshole, Kenny, if you push me I’ll tell you and you’ll ruin the surprise!”

“Ok then, I’ll hang up.” I say calmly.

“Don’t. Just tell me what’s new.”

“Well,” I have to think about something that doesn’t have to do with my shitty life. "Oh, right! Stan dumped Wendy."

“You mean that Wendy dumped Stan? That's not new!” He answers with a scoff, a grin grows on my face.

“No, idiot! I said Stan dumped Wendy! He did it.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No.”

“Kenny, that's fucking awesome.”

“Yes, I was sick of them. Stan gets all dark and goth.” I say, finally laying in bed.

"Screw that hippie bitch!”

“You are just pissed at her because you never got her to like you.” I hear him groan.

“Whatever, Kenny. How's Stan?” I guess it is that kind of stuff that makes me think he has changed.

“He was crying and laughing at the same time. It creeped me out! But I think he will be better soon.” I hear Eric laugh a bit.

“He will find another hippie, if he doesn't then he still has his jew,” I hum in an affirmative way. “Are you still sick?”

“Just a little.”

"God damn it Kenny, I told you not to stay out so late!” I chuckle.

"You can’t tell me what to do, but I will be fine. Don’t worry."  

“If I was there, I would just make you stay home for a while.”

“Oh, really? I’d like to see you try.” I purr, teasing and there's something delightful in his reply, between a scoff and a laugh.

"Kenny," The way he says it sends a shiver of satisfaction through me. “You flirty son of a bitch. What about you, are you dating someone new?”

“Not really. Got bored with the last one.”

“Weren’t you trying that polyamours crap?”

“Yes, I just. I don’t know. Maybe dating is not for me.” 

“And what about sex?”

“I’m too tired to think about that.”

“What. Is it Kenny the one I’m talking to? Did you die and got replaced by an evil clone?”

“Shut up, Cartman. You are being a fucking asshole.” He snickers.

“No, you are an asshole, Kenny. Get some rest and we will talk tomorrow, ok?” 

“Oh, ok.” I’m too tired anyway, so I fall asleep wondering what surprise is he talking about.

I wake up facing the window, the sun is shining and I feel better. I think about Cartman, and when I look at my cell phone, I see that he is calling. I pick up, but I can’t talk.

“Kenny! What the fuck?”

“Huh?”

“Are you still sick?”

“What. No. Better.” It’s all I get to mutter.

“You are late for school! Fucking run.” He hangs up. I look at the clock and shit! I’m half an hour late! I usually wouldn’t care, but I want to graduate this year, so I run as fast as I can, but when I’m getting to the classroom, I slide on a wet tile. I know my head is about to burst with a stair edge. I shut my eyes. I have died so many times, why is it still scary?

As I fall, my life goes through my eyes until I remember this morning call. 

Wait. 

How did Eric know I was late for school?

Something stops me right before the impact.

Prev ☆ Next

[kimium]

Music Tag Game!

I was tagged by @m34gs (in this post). Also doing this in a new post because I don't like it when posts get cluttered. I love doing these, but bold to assume I have ten mutuals/followers to tag.

Also, time to out myself for majority of my songs are not mainstream music...

Rules: When you see this, post 5 songs you actually listen to and tag 10 of your followers/mutuals!

MWTWB by Amalee

The entire album by Amalee relates to her Vtuber character, The Monarch and the backstory to her. While I like all the songs on the album, MWTWB (Messing with the Wrong Bitch) is my favourite because it has strong Vil from Twisted Wonderland vibes. That's honestly a big reason why I love the song so much. However, besides that I love the entire theme of the song is "Fuck Around and Find Out". My favourite lyric to the song is, "Uh-oh! Keep making me mad and it will be off with your head." because I love a good Alice in Wonderland reference.

2. The Rumbling/Under the Tree by SiM

I know this is cheating, but I believe these two songs need to be listened in conjunction. These are the two openings to the final season of Attack on Titan. The Rumbling is written in Eren's perspective and Under the Tree is written in Mikasa's. What I love about these two songs is how they capture the essence of the two characters. Both have changed significantly since season one and this change has caused a lot of heart ache (and death).

Eren is focused on what he feels is his "duty" with lyrics such as, "If I lose it all, slip and fall, I will never look away." At this point in the series, Eren feels there is no other path he can take, no matter the cost.

Meanwhile, Mikasa's song has heartbreaking lyrics like "Where are you at? / Where have you been?" and "Why oh why, why oh why/Don't you want to stay with me?"

This truly feels like the two are in conversation with one another, with Under the Tree Mikasa's response to Eren's song. That kind of duality always gets to me in songs. I love when songs connect to one another and these two do it perfectly.

3. homura by LiSA

Oh look, another anime song. How predictable of me. Anyways, while most people cite Gurenge as their favourite Kimetsu no Yaiba song, I think homura is my favourite.

Even if this song wasn't from an anime, the lyrics to this farewell song are heartbreaking. Right at the beginning, the "Sayonara, arigatou koe no kagiri" ("Goodbye" and "thank you" at the top of my voice") pulls at my heartstrings. The next part, "Kanashimi yori motto daiji na koto" or, "What is more important than grief?" really hits me hard.

Also, my link is to LiSA's performance on The First Take and her voice is breathtaking. Absolutely stunning.

4. Avid by Hiroyuki Sawano

From the anime Eighty-Six, this soft, but powerful song always makes me want to cry. The repetition of "Don't you get there?/ It calls, it calls" makes this song feel haunting, like someone long gone talking to you. Which, given Eighty-Six's plot, makes sense.

5. Love From The Other Side by Fall Out Boy

Oh, look, a mainstream song that I could play at work and not be accused of only listening to anime songs. Finally, right? (Not that anyone accuses me of that, but they definitely could and get away with it.)

Uh, I know I've talked about this song in a prior ask somewhere on my blog, but to repeat myself: I like Fall Out Boy. I'm not a huge fan, but I have a smattering of songs from them that I really like. This is one of their newest songs and I was immediately hooked as soon as I heard the lyric, "What would you trade the pain for? Not sure". I'm just always here for songs that have questions to the listener that make you pause and think for a second. I also love the reference in, "We were a hammer to the Statue of David". My minimal two years of art history jumped in glee.

Time to tag. If this isn't your cup of tea, no pressure! Also if you dislike being tagged in things like this, let me know!

Tagging: @someobscurereference @a-little-harmed-shinra @shreedle @serenescribe @zeldabard and @lonery-w

[nymphiria]

𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐄 𝟒 𝐀𝐋𝐋!

[ ❤︎ ] - 𝐊𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐉𝐈 𝐆𝐀𝐍𝐆 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐀𝐑𝐘 𝐖𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐄

ଓ ◠ 𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: sanzu, kakucho, rindou, ran, kokonoi, hanma, shion, mikey

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆: nsfw content ahead! minors dni !!

had to repost cause it got taken down :(

ᨳ - 𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐙𝐔

he thought he would never be interested in fucking you since he was constantly busy with mikey. why would he need a whore to distract him when he’s got a gang to help run?

throws all of that out the window when you sit on his lap for the first time. maybe he could be distracted for a few minutes just for this.

and god is he hooked when he sees how you cream around his fellow members’ cocks when you think you’re not being watched. he can almost imagine your whimpers of their name being for him as he stuffs you full from behind — your poor little pussy sore from the stretch.

but once he finally fucks you? he’s selfish. he finds any and every excuse to touch you at any given time. if he’s lounging on the couch, he needs to have you in his lap stroking his pretty pink hair. if he’s just finished beating the shit out of some bastard, he needs you giving him head to relax him.

he might just have to keep you in his room.

ᨳ - 𝐊𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐂𝐇𝐎

was super hesitant about sleeping with you.

if his “friends” were fucking you, why were you crawling to him to get your pussy stuffed? it didn’t make any sense.

took him a while to finally give into your begging but once he did he was shamefully obsessed. he’ll never touch you first but will drop hints to let you know that he wants you. at first, he’ll clear his throat to get your attention and hopefully you’ll notice what he’s trying to convey. if that doesn’t work, he’s lightly rubbing your thighs as you’re perched in his lap.

prefers to be intimate in the privacy of his bedroom but if you tease him too much he’ll drag you into the first empty room he can find and fuck you dumb.

he’s so sweet and gentle … until he’s not.

ᨳ - 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐔

acts cold and uninterested to your face but in reality he’s pussy-whipped.

calls you a slut in front of the guys, saying things like “who wants a bitch that’s already been stretched out by everybody?”

him. he’s the one who wants you.

once you’re in between the four walls of his room or alone together in his car, he’s fucking you like a bitch in heat. he’s drooling over your tits, moaning into your neck, and gripping whatever flesh he can to keep himself from finishing early.

he’s a complete sucker for aftercare, too. after he creams your insides, you have to hold him close and stroke his hair while he’s nuzzled into your chest. becomes an absolute softie when you praise how good he did.

asshole in the streets, simp in the sheets.

ᨳ - 𝐑𝐀𝐍

unlike his brother, he has no shame in letting everyone in earshot know he loves fucking you. from the moment he knew you existed, he was using that famous haitani charisma to woo you into his bed. sweet lavender eyes and a sooting voice masked the filthy scenes going through his imagination.

loves to take you to roppongi’s best clubs and show you off to anyone possible. of course, you’ll be wearing the skimpiest outfits you can find in your closet. why go out with ran if you weren’t gonna show off all your assets?

likes to tease you with his baton every now and then. he lifts up your skirt and prods your panty-covered cunt with the tip of the weapon — you’re always soaked. he finds it cute when you whine all teary-eyed saying he’s embarrassing you. something about the tears dripping down your face makes his pants a little tighter.

maybe you’ll cry more when he makes you fuck yourself with his baton.

ᨳ - 𝐊𝐎𝐊𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐈

sugar daddy without the title.

spoils you to absolute death with all of his gifts and affection. every single outfit, piece of jewelry, and pair of shoes is in your closet thanks to koko. his motto is “pretty girls should have pretty things” and you couldn’t agree more!

super big softie. adores hand holding, soft sex, long hugs — you name it. his favorite thing, though, is cuddling.

honestly, he likes to cuddle anywhere in the base — especially if others can see. the sight is usually met with glares from his fellow kanto manji members. it strokes his ego well to know that they see how comfortable you are with him.

they may fuck your lights out from time to time, but you’ll always come crawling back to your daddy for his love.

ᨳ - 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐌𝐀

mean, mean, MEAN.

your poor heart can’t take how cruel he is to you. he’s always laughing when you cry, lifting up your skirt when he walks past, or softly yanking your hair to see you tear up. like ran, he enjoys seeing your tear-soaked face after his relentless teasing.

he knows when he takes it too far, though. when you’ve hit your limit, he’ll squish your wet cheeks together with his tattooed hands and make you look at him. brings you in for a kiss softer than you could ever expect from hanma.

you’ll always forgive him after he makes you cum three or four times while his head is tucked between your legs. eats you out until you’re dizzy and begging for him to stop. gives you another kiss even with your juices still dripping down his chin.

but the next day, his sadistic routine will start again.

ᨳ - 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐎𝐍

big nasty pervert for you.

the first day he heard you were in the base, he was looking for you. you weren’t there but two hours before he was groping every inch of your body.

fondling your tits, smacking your ass, and smothering himself with your thighs are among his favorite daily activities. having a woman accessible to him 24/7? that was his dream come true.

sleeping in your panties is a big no-no. if your pussy is covered, how can he fuck you while you nap? you’re the kanto manji gang’s whore — you needed to be ready for them all day, every day. loves to slip his cock in you from behind and rut his hips into your ass. who cares if he cums early? you won’t be awake to care.

even if you did, he’d stuff you with more.

ᨳ - 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘

is overall disinterested in what his members do with you on the daily.

he’s too engrossed in his responsibilities as the head of a gang to have time to enjoy their honorary whore. prefers to watch from a distance both what and who you do.

but when his men fight over who gets to have you? that’s when he needs to remind them who gave you to them in the first place. he’s the only reason they get to enjoy you — because mikey allowed it.

fucks you hard and deep on the mahogany meeting table — his men forced to watch how you moan their leader’s name while you take him to the hilt. they’re dead silent as the watch the lewd scene in front of them. what can they say? one word and mikey would put them six feet underground.

when he’s done filling your pussy with his seed, he makes you cockwarm him for a few hours afterward. since his men want to disrupt the peace, none of them will be allowed to touch you for a week.

after all, you were his property.

taglist: @p-antomime

[sheshirkat]

Eddie "The Freak" Munson as King of the Upside Down : a thread

He wakes up with a demobat licking his blood. He doesn't stop it. There's something that he can't really pinpoint that's reassuring and weirdly healing about its tongue on his wounds. And also weirdly, there's no other demobats around. ("Hivemind remember...where the fuck are the others?")

Turns out demobat's venom can be as deadly as it is healing. Boy got no idea how long he was in between life and death, in "the dark", but he woke up with the demobat and there was scars and pain but it wasn't nearly as bad.

So he gets up, and the upside down is changing around him. Accelerating. With the four gates opened, the upside down stuck in Hawkins S1 is changing for Hawkins S4.

He goes back into his trailer only to find that the gate is closed. ("It makes no sense, the gate should still be here whether or not the fourth gate has been opened so why isn't it here..?")

(Like the cloud we've seen at the end of the episode is actually a huge ass gate but has to be developped before it can reach full potential and allow passageway. Until then it's kind of like a black hole, everything that comes in each way ends up in a different time period of hawkins, and can't get back in or something like that, since the upside down is accelerating and morphing through time.)

"HENDERSON!"

No answer. Unsurprisingly.

"HARRINGTON? WHEELER? BUCKLEY? ANYONE?? HEYYY IM ALIVE !!"

Having a mental breakdown in all Munson Glory.

Only to notice the previous demobat at his feet. Not attacking him. It just followed him and is pulling on his jeans.

"What the---" it nuzzles against him.

He tentatively puts his hand on its head.

It does like that cat thing where cats push their heads onto your hands to make you caress them.

Eddie goes to check the Creel House "why not, everyone who might still be alive probably think I'm dead, there's no gates and Vecna didn't come to smother me in my deadly sleep. I'll take that as a sign."

The house is empty. And if he sighs from relief, a bat in his shaking hands, well, no one has got to know. ("No one will ever look for you anyway", a voice that sounds too much like himself whispers in his head)

The demobat is still here. He sits and carress her for a while. And while she FUCKING PURRS WHAT THE FUCK he notices she's purring master of puppets of all things.

In the asylum where victor creel is, they use music to "reach parts of the brain that other things can't"

Turns out eddie's rendition of master of puppets resonated in the demobat and she took quite a liking to him. Apparently.

He calls her Minnie. (Idk why I'm just rlly thinking about sirius black's nickname for mcgonnagal) (eddie and sirius do have much shit in common tho)

Also the tentacles hive things disappeared. Not that he'd know but while Henry/One/Vecna was still alive, he was weak, and lost touch with some of the upside down he had control with.

Since no one and nothing is here, he takes his shield, his weaponery, his guitare, a backpack, Minnie on his shoulder, and goes to explore.

First time Minnie goes away, he's hella fucking scared, not far away from skull rock, and crouch down under the rock (not) ready to blast a bitch.

She gives him hell of a scare when she comes back, another creature he's never seen before in her mouth. She eats a part of it. And dump the half on his knees.

He's hungry as hell, and a demobat saved him, so why the fuck not?

"Why the fuck not?" Becomes his motto.

First nights where he tries to sleep he's got awful nightmares.

Minnie stays besides him. He sleeps a bit better when she cuddles with him, humming the tune to master of puppets in a near perfect imitation.

He gets to the big cloud eventually, but Minnie doesn't want to let him inside, and he doesn't know why, but he trusts her. Crazy thing, but he doesn't feel as alone as he used to. Not with her there.

So he keeps exploring. Roams the upside down for god knows how long.

He and Minnie fight good against demobats and demogorgon.

First time they fought demogorgons Eddie was scared. He had managed to kill one out of three and the two others had Minnie in their eyesight ("does that thing even have eyes? C'mon Minnie you know they gotta be blind asf"). He ends up face to face with both demogorgons and his favorite demobat right behind him. They knock the shit out of him, but he does manage do get a few clean hits. On his back, ready to die for the second time, hoping minnie will at least get enough time to run away, his mind hazy and his soul almost leaving his body, he sees something.

Minnie's metal as fuck. She splurts fucking fire.

Yeah because Minnie's a fucking demodragon because "why the fuck not."

She grows real quick. Eddie's got no real idea how time passes in the upside down, it feels like he needs to eat and sleep less than in normal Hawkins.

He and Minnie find a few rogue demobats. There's no more hive mind, the demobats are just in total chaos. Some attack them. Others attack each other. There's no pattern.

Once in what he named "the batcave" afterwards, eddie takes out his guitare, and plays master of puppets, Minnie purring the tune on his shoulder.

Also Vecna's out to build an army and get back his power full force somewhere else. Don't tell me the upside down is only Hawkins' upside down. There was gates in Russia. The upside down's wayyy bigger. I'm talking like the whole world bigger.

So when Vecna's back and attacking Hawkins a year later, after the start of the reconstruction and healing, it's Vecna's army of hiveminded demobats and demogorgons against the kids and the scooby gang (minus eddie).

And eddie comes out of that huge ass cloud Hawkins kept freaking out about (and built a wall around it) ("like anything's gonna actually care and stop at the gates" "thanks for the positivity steve"), and he comes out, guitare on his back, bat and shield in his hands, onto Minnie's back, who became a full height demodragon by that time.

"Come with me if you wanna live big boy." "Didn't I tell you not to play hero?" "Oh but aren't you glad I didn't listen to you Harrington?" (If steve's eyes were shining a bit from held back tears or lack of sleep, no one can tell.) (Self indluging headcanon of steddie powercouple on demodragon Minnie's back tho)

Dustin says nothing. He just hugs him. Really hard. "Hey henderson, not that I mind your enthousiasm, but could you step aside two seconds, got few demogorgons to smash, be right back"

"No No No don't jinx it you idiot! "

"-okay I *splash of blood* won't *gets kicked on the ground* be right back *stands up and slash demogorgon's head*

After the war, Minnie's a bit jealous at first. Okay, a lot. She did put fire to Dustin shoes. But when Dustin makes her taste chocolate bars, she's a little more keen to accept that he's close to Eddie. The others are up to you.

Or maybe she dies and Eddie goes absolutely feral idk

I'm tired as hell, wrapping this shit up. Maybe I'll make a fanfic out of it, who knows. Saw a post about Eddie king of the Upside Down and I just HAD to make this. Also Minnie & Eddie Friendship vibez : Oh Ana, Mother Mother

[obx-pogue4life]

Consequences

Authors Note: Hi everyone :) This one got a little weird but what's new lol I hope you like it. I feel a bit rusty too so please ignore any typos or grammar shit I missed. I'm easing back into writing and I had a lot of fun with this one! Thanks for participating in the poll and please leave me some feedback on if you liked this!

Summary: You hook up with Rafe on a one night stand and leave him while he's getting ready only he finds you and lets you know just how much he doesn't like being ditched like that.

Warnings: Language, dirty talk, hooking up, one night stands, rough play, spanking, cnc, bratty reader, rafe being rafe, a ton more im sure but I can't think of them!

"Shit" you thought to yourself. You were getting a drink at the bar when you spotted him. The guy you hooked up with last night. Rafe Cameron. You chugged your drink and slammed it down on the counter with a crash. "Was this dude following me?" You thought to yourself again. You needed to play it cool because that was just a one time thing. You weren't into starting anything with anyone and just wanted to have fun. That's why you came out tonight, to find your next conquest. Hump 'em and dump 'em was your unofficial motto and you lived for one night stands. You liked to quickly move on to the next, no real feelings involved and no one gets hurt. 

The bartender handed you another drink and you threw this one back giving an exasperated sigh after hoping to catch the attention of the cute guy at the end of the bar. You glanced his way to try and make eye contact with him but instead noticed someone else charging towards you in a rush. You pretended not to notice and quickly turned on your heels and started to walk away towards the exit. You needed to get out of there quickly because of course, Rafe would find you at this bar of all places and of course, he would try and confront you about last night. You knew he wanted you for more than just one night but you still slept with him anyway. You just couldn't walk away from such a sure thing with someone like him. He was drop dead gorgeous but a force to be reckoned with. His hard exterior intrigued you but he never seemed interested in you enough for you to take seriously until yesterday. That's when you made your move and how you ended up in his bed this morning and how you conveniently left while he was cleaning up. 

You ducked down the hallway by the bathrooms and were quickly approaching the back exit but just as you put your hand on the door you felt two strong arms grip your waist and spin you around. "Oh my gosh, Rafe! Hi! What are you doing here?" You tried to play it off cool. "I really need to get going but it was nice to see you" and you leaned in for a quick kiss on the cheek and started to turn around again. You let out a slow breath as you reached for the handle to push again, silently praying that your little fake shocked "oh hi" stunt worked. You walk through the door and let out a sigh of relief only to be startled by the sound of your name falling from Rafe's lusty and angry sounding lips. 

"Don't fucking walk away from me y/n" he says in a harsh but desperate tone. "Why did you fucking leave like that this morning?"

"I...umm..." you fumbled with your words for a minute but quickly got it together. You faced him now and took in your scenery around you. It was your classic back alley way. A narrow brick wall lining each side of you, random graffiti spray painted in various places, old cardboard boxes and a dumpster by the door you just came out of.  "Y/N!" Rafe said sterenly. "Come on, what fucking gives?" 

You gave him your best smile and reach out to touch his cheek. "You know what they say Rafey, always leave 'em wanting more..." you trail off trying to turn and leave again. His hand catching your arm before you could escape. 

"So that's it? That's how it's gonna be?" You shrug your shoulders and give him an unamused smirk. 

"Fuck, you're such a bitch y/n" he said running his hand over the top of his head. "You played me and for what? Dinner? A place to sleep? A decent fuck? I don't get it, I really liked you and I thought you felt the same. It took a lot for me to even go out last night and when I saw you were alone for once, I decided to shoot my shot" 

"I don't know what to say Rafe" you say annoyed. I really need to go tho-" but he yanks your arm hard and cut you off. 

"Oh you're not going anywhere yet" he says angrily. You roll your eyes at him and try to shove him off. "Let go of me, you asshole" you shout. 

"I am not the asshole in this situation y/n. You are and I think it's about time someone taught you a lesson. Tell me y/n, do you do this to all your dates or am I just the lucky one" he questions, sounding hurt but slightly amused. You stayed completely silent but roll your eyes at him again. You can see his one hand clench into a fist and feel the other tighten his grip on you even more. "I swear to God if you roll your eyes at me one more fucking time, you're gonna regret it. Stop being such a disrespectful cunt." 

You smirked at him completely intrigued by his outrage and let out a muffled giggle. "Oh yeah Rafey, what are you gonna do out here to me? Yell at me? Call me names? Your such a blowhard, just let me go you asshole so we can both move on. Let me go or you're gonna be the one whose fucking sorry," you spat out. 

Suddenly a look of complete abandon comes  over Rafe's face as he gives you a creepy unhinged smile. His eyes go black and he cocks his head to the side and takes a step closer to you, removing any inch of distance between you. "Is that a threat?" He asks grabbing your other arm and pushing you into the brick wall next to the dumpster. He was so close you could feel his pulsating, bulging cock through his pants. Smiling to yourself you think "maybe I could get into this, like finally a guy that's full of surprises" and you shake your head and take a deep breath in and let it out slowly, looking into his eyes as he brings your hands over your head and pushes them into the hard bricks. It kind of hurts but you like it. "Maybe I misjudged you..." you said outloud. 

"Maybe you did...he answers  you and starts kissing your neck. 

He hoisted you up a little against the wall and in a fever of rushed kisses and animalistic grunting you were getting so turned on and so wet it was starting to pool between your legs. He sucked on a particularly sensitive spot on your neck and you moaned his name so loud you could feel him immediately smirk into your neck. He ran his tongue over the shell of your ear and started sucking and nibbling on your ear lobe, a spot he found last night that drove you wild. He had his knee in between your legs helping hold you up and you were shamelessly humping and riding his thigh when he abruptly stopped and let you down with a thud. You didn't even have time to think before he put your hands over your head again and said "close your eyes and don't you dare fucking move." 

Against all your instincts and better judgement you let your excitement take over and did exactly as you were told. Next thing you knew, your dress was being ripped down the middle and thrown from your body. "Rafe! What the hell" you started to yell and go towards the ruined material only to feel him shove you hard up against the bricks again, scraping your bare skin and prickling at your delicate flesh. "Ow! "That hurts, you dick," you yell at him. "Deal with it" he said nonchalantly. You roll your eyes at his glib attitude. "You're such a prick. You ruined my dress! How am I supposed to get home with no clothes?!" you shouted furiously. 

"Who says you're going home right now?" he growled back at you with a question. "And how was I supposed to know that you weren't wearing any underwear" he said smirking. "Who knew you were such a little hoe" he laughed. You're bare pussy and exposed tits we're on full display for him and anyone who ventured into the alleyway. "Lighten up y/n we're just messing around, it'll be fine, just relax" he said taking off his button down. "You can use this later but only if you take your punishment like a good girl. I can see it going both ways actually because something tells me you don't take orders very well. I told you not to roll your eyes at me and you just couldn't help yourself. This is your fault. These are the consequences of your actions. 

He grabbed you harshly by your arm and spun you around to face the brick wall. Kicking both your feet to the sides, he roughly feels you up over your ass and his fingertips graze your soaking pussy. "Don't move" he says coldly. You couldn't believe how turned on you were considering you were in a pretty rough spot but it was so thrilling that you couldn't help but be turned on. Smiling to yourself you look over your shoulder and lock eyes with Rafe. "Did I tell you, you could turn around? He says angrily. 

"No," you say in a pouty voice. Two can play this game and if he wants to do this then it might as well be entertaining, you thought to yourself. 

"Turn around, put your hands on the wall and lean forward like a good girl for once in your fucking life" he says. You do as your told and feel his hands caress the smooth skin of your ass. He cups your cheeks and jiggles them a little and you love how good his hands feel on your aching and needy body. His fingers move their way to your aching core and he lightly traces your dripping folds, teasing you. You moan out in pleasure and he stops immediately. "You enjoying this y/n?" He asks and you nod your head and instantly say yes. He gives you three hard smacks on your bottom and then grips your ass cheeks again harshly. "I don't think you're ready..." he trails off. 

"I'm ready!" You say quickly and instantly regret it when you hear him darkly chuckle. "Oh you silly little slut," he chuckles menacingly. "You're no where near ready but that's ok. You want it, you've got it," he says ominously. 

His finger quickly find your puckering hole and make its way inside you, roughly and without caution. You squirm uncomfortably but don't move. "Mmmm good girl" he praises. "Let's add another finger." 

Quickly he adds a second and then a third. You have tears streaming down your face but at the same time it feels so good you can't help but let out a pleasurable moan. You can tell your body is about to give in even more when he abruptly stops and pulls his fingers out. "You like this don't you y/n?" You could feel the breeze against your bare and exposed flesh and it makes you shiver. "Yes" you said quietly. "I thought so, such a little whore for me, outside, naked and bent over" he gloats. "Now...you're ready." 

With your hands still on the wall you hear him undo his pants and you mentally prepare for his cock. He is so big and not in the way that most guys think they are. He was actually huge, longest and thickest cock you'd ever laid eyes on. He looks unreal. Most definitely not the norm and most definitely well above average. You wiggle your ass towards him eager to feel him inside you. "You want this cock again y/n?" He asks you. "Fuck yes. Pleaseeee Rafe" you say wiggling your ass at him again. You can hear him fiddling with his belt buckle and then suddenly you feel a hard and painful smack on your ass. "Shit! What the hell Rafe!" you shriek. He yanks you back by your hair and whispers in your ear. "Count with me to 10 or I'll keep going until you do" he growls, nibbling your ear just a tad before harshly shoving your head back towards the wall. "Raf-" you were cut off by a swift smack from his belt. "Fuck" you say, tears coming to your eyes." 

"Y/n" he said testily. He hits your ass again, harder this time. You yelped out in pain but quickly say "one" and swallow it down. "That's a good girl, keep going" he says coldly. Over and over again, he spanks you with his belt. Your ass is on fire and you are full on crying in the alleyway but there is not a sole in sight. Your tortured cries are blending in with the booming music from behind the closed door you came out of earlier. No one can hear you. 

"Nine" you cry out, shaking and crying so badly you don't think you can take another smack from him. You can feel the welts forming. It feels horrible but a small part of you is enjoying it. "Last one y/n and then we're done. You ready?" You sniffle and sigh but shake your head and say yes. He swats you the hardest yet as you sob out "ten" to his complete enjoyment and pure satisfaction. 

"Turn around and look at me y/n" he says harshly. You reluctantly turn around to face him and all you see is a blank and eerie expression. If you didn't know better you would almost think he looks sad. "Your actions have consequences. Everything you do, everyone you play, has to deal with the repercussions of your selfish bull shit. You act like a whore, you get treated like a whore. It's as simple as that.  Don't mess with peoples emotions. It WILL catch up to you. You act like trash, you get treated like trash. 

"Is that so" you challenge, reaching for his button down. He quickly moves it away and places it on top of the dumpster next to you. He takes a step closer to you and moves a piece of hair out of your eyes and tucks it behind your ear. Looking up at him your legs buckle a bit and he catches you and sits you on top of his shirt on the dumpster lid. The dumpster has two lids on it and the one on the other side of where you sit was open. "This is gross, help me back down, I'll be ok to stand" you say peering over, completely disgusted. 

"Oh I don't really give a fuck if you can stand or not y/n" he says shooting daggers at you with his eyes. 

"What are you talking about, why am I sitting up here then? Help me down Rafe, come on" you plead. 

"No" he says simply and starts walking over to where your ripped dress is on the ground. He picks it up and tosses it into the open end of the dumpster. "Hey! My dress! What are you doing?" You shout. 

"I told you, you act like trash, you get treated like trash and that extends to your belongings too y/n." 

"You're such a dick, you know that? You spit at him. 

"Well...since you already think so..." he says walking back over to you and giving his shirt your body is sitting on a few hard yanks. He frees his shirt, you tumble into the open dumpster and see the outline of his body walking away from you, back towards the door of the club. "RAFE CAMERON WHAT THE FUCK" you scream! He turns around one last time and takes a few steps back towards you and sighs. "I told you y/n, you act like trash, you get treated like trash. End of story" he shrugs, tossing you his button down and his belt. I think you can make these work so you can get home without getting arrested...he trails off, walking away. You didn't have any snappy comeback or harsh words to say to him. You watch him walk away without looking back and when the door slams closed, all you can do is look around and shout "fuck" into the emptiness.

Thanks so much for reading! I appreciate it and I hope you enjoyed! Feel free to reblog, like and/or leave a comment! 🩵🩵🩵

[hotwings0203]

Crazy reader is immaculate. When he slaps her around and suddenly she's ready to risk it all pouncing on him, a wild look in her eye and he's shocked as he realizes she's not gonna stop attacking him until she gets what she wants ughh please

Hell yeah fuckin boss

Tw:noncon, abuse, use of knife is plugged in orifices, heavy fucked up shit

It’s when her head is cracked against the wall for the umpteenth time that her mind too snaps in half.

It’s when his laughter rings a little too loudly this time that her smile stretches unnaturally across her face, almost up to her ears.

It’s when he pulls her frayed hair back to spit in her face that her bloodshot eyes open wide, as if seeing clearly for the first time.

It feels like she is, too.

Because Katsuki isn’t the only one who can play dirty. Look, she can too! See the knife in her hand?

What’s wrong Katsuki? Why are you backing away? It doesn’t feel good now that you’re the little bitch, is it?

Don’t walk away from me. Remember? Isn’t that what you always told me? When you would kick the living daylights out of my broken body and then fuck the remains?

Let’s see how far this blade can go in your asshole this time before you pass out. Wanna see if you can break my record? It was 7 seconds. I remember it because you’d spank me with the knife still in me every time I cried or stopped counting.

But give me a minute to find something bigger for you. I mean, it was your motto, right? You can take it, a slut like you has have to had bigger and better. And maybe I’ll even make you beg and scream at how you haven’t like you made me used to, maybe I’ll make you convince me that I’m the best you’ve ever had.

So don’t look at me with those scared eyes, Katsuki. I’m just playing by your rules.

[ahtsumu]

what your haikyuu!! fave says about you

hinata: wholesome; there’s something pretty big standing in the way of your current goals that you hope to overcome; you send those heart memes into group chats; your life motto is to have courage and be kind; aka you are a hufflepuff; you tend to stan/identify with protagonists; aka your favourite harry potter character is deadass harry potter (… or neville)

kageyama: you want to be a bad bitch; you started drinking cow juice milk out of a little box with a straw bc you saw that kags does; wildin’ online but you’re a lil shy irl; “little shit” is one of your favourite insults/terms of endearment; you refuse to play any position other than setter for pickup games

tanaka: wack af; don’t know how to use your inside voice; short temper but usually very sweet; you like walking around barefoot; you have a pretty sick party trick–– probably something physical and reckless, like a headstand LMAO; high alcohol tolerance

nishinoya: also wack but you’re short so you’re even weirder; you probably play libero on your volleyball team; you’ve tried copying the rolling thunder move and your first attempt was also your last

tsukishima: all your faves are tsunderes; dry af sense of humour; probably spends an unhealthy amount of time on reddit; people who know you irl call you a troll; definitely a complainer; hate-watch reality tv shows; people ask if you’re anemic/sick/tired a lot–– you’re probably not, you just never sleep; drinks too much caffeine

kuroo: thirsty

kenma: you play(ed) at least one of the following: legend of zelda, any final fantasy, the elder scrolls, fallout; you wear thick-frame glasses; cat-person; you’ve dyed your hair before; probably watch(ed) danisnotonfire and pewdiepie; definitely went through an emo phase or is currently going through one; you like “smol” things

bokuto: life of the party; you may be a little self-centred/vain but you milk the shit out of it for comedic purposes; you know your way around a grill; VERY COMPETITIVE; you listen to nicki minaj and cardi b unironically; probably lowkey famous on twitter for memes; definitely know too many tiktok dances

akaashi: pretty boys are the bane of your existence; you definitely draw or make art of some sort; you do well in school and have “intellectual” interests; pink is one of your favourite colours; soft aesthetic; you watch yuri!!! on ice; you either can’t stop cursing or struggle to say “fuck” irl; you want to start a bujo or you currently keep one

atsumu: you were originally an oikawa stan but you switched lanes when he said that fucking goody two shoes line because his voice is pure sex; you text with HAHAHA instead of 😂; probably curse like a sailor; you flirt by comparing hand sizes; you have a sweet tooth; active on twitter; a little self-centred; you laugh at fail compilations

osamu: atsumu was too much of a dick, immature, or cocky; you’re drawn to quiet people; most if not all your interests revolve around food; you intentionally root for the underdog in most movies/books; not very competitive, you prefer to just go with the flow; you can relate to being in someone else’s shadow; you probably stan loki over thor too oh my god you do don’t you

oikawa: your fave fic genre is angst; hoe for astrology, sci-fi, and crystals/palm reading; you’ve probably gone through a HELLA rough patch in your life (possibly depression); you like writing and probably have written an in-depth character analysis about him; you struggle with finding balance in your life; you get played by fuckboys irl but you never learn bc they’re just so hot

iwaizumi: you know an oikawa irl; you also watch free! but not for the plot 👀; your favourite fanfiction trope is enemies to lovers; you flirt by being mean to your crush; probably a beast at arm-wrestling; you’re physically strong but might not seem like it; owner of a resting bitch face for sure

terushima: two words: tongue piercing

ushijima: very slim chance you have crackhead energy; you’re ambitious and tend to stan powerful/successful characters; most likely also “gifted” with some sort of talent or skill–– and you’re damn good at whatever it is; one of your hobbies is a sport; you’re doing well at school; people say you’re a chill person; definitely have a thing for his thighs; you want ushijima to r u i n you

tendou: you watch at least one of the following: hunter x hunter, one piece, naruto, or bleach; unconventional-looking or ugly anime characters are your type; massive fucking troll; you openly thirst on main; you shitpost on your main instagram; you fear nothing, god fears you

semi: be honest you just like anime boys with silver hair

[ttuesday]

We just lost a family member. It was my uncle, it’s so sudden it kinda got me thinking while trying to escape reality for a bit:

What would the gang be like during crisis mode? Between the inconsolable sorrow and the desire for someone to pay. It can teeter between rage, survivors guilt, sorrow and all the other emotions that come with being numb from loss.

Especially Arthur mostly because someone needs to get got for causing such damage to the gang, and I know he says vengeance is a fools game but for his S/O I think he’d go John-Fucking-Wick on someone.

I’m also thinking Dutch, Javier, Charles and Hosea (he’s interesting bc he’s survived this long for a damn reason). And SADIE.

yo I know you know this already but if you need anything I'm always here <3 I hope these headcanons are good!

Arthur

Arthur's in shock. He knows what life as an outlaw is like, he's witnessed many deaths and destruction yet it's something he can never get used to.

His main priority is making sure you're ok. Seeing you upset makes him panic and he blames himself. Arthur won't stop going through different scenarios in his head where everything might've worked out ok.

He knows revenge is bad but knowing how this has impacted you and his own mixed feelings of regret and guilt pushes him over the edge.

Arthur packs his satchel full of everything he needs, loads up his guns and gets ready to track down whatever motherfucker that has caused this. You wake up just before he leaves your shared tent. You know what his plan is just from looking at him. Maybe you'll stop him or maybe you'll go with him, that's your decision.

Dutch

Dutch always tells the gang that revenge is a fool's game. It's a motto he's learned to live by but when business gets personal, Dutch can be quite the hypocrite.

Dutch knows that killing whoever caused this will bring you and everyone else the closure ye need but it isn't that simple. In one way, Dutch feels as though the world around him is caving in.

He spends the next few days alone in his tent. The only thing he's focused on now is finding an excuse to kill this person. Maybe the killer was also paying off the Pinkertons or maybe they're gonna be on a high society train that ye could rob.

Dutch knows he's going to kill them but now he has to make up a reason why that will align with his twisted morality.

Javier

Javier is confused. How could this happen? Why did this happen? It's like the entire gang is asking these questions yet no one can come up with an answer.

When Javier first heard about what happened, you were the first person he thought of. He didn't care how far away you were, he needed to go and see you. Maybe if he was fast enough then he could be the one to break the news to you.

He didn't say much when he saw you. Javier simply sighed in defeat as he wrapped his arms around you. He guided you over to a quiet spot and sat with you for as long as you needed.

Javier knows that if he’s determined on getting revenge, that could take months or maybe even years. But right now, revenge doesn't matter. The only thing he cares about now is you.

Charles

Things like this normally doesn't impact Charles that much, he knows that he has to accept it. But it's different when you’re involved. Charles wants you to be happy and to have a good life, not deal with grief and disaster.

Before you can even think about what's after happening, Charles is swiftly by your side and comforting you. Charles doesn't care about his own emotions, in all honestly he felt numb after hearing about what happened so instead he focuses on you.

Every morning Charles takes you out hunting so you can vent and express all the different emotions you're feeling without the whole gang listening in.

Sometimes when he's lying in bed at night, Charles wonders if he should try to get some kind of vengeance but he doesn't know if he can. That's something he'll only be able to figure out when he's face to face with the person responsible for all this sorrow.

Hosea

Hosea knows all the current emotions you're feeling. Denial, guilt, helplessness, sadness and maybe you might feel nothing at all.

At some point in his life, Hosea’s felt the same way so he knows how to help you through this.

But Hosea is quick to tell you that the best thing you can do is move on. If you go get revenge then that will only result in more pain and death. Life is hard, cruel and relentless, and the best thing we can do is try to keep up with it's constant punches.

Hosea will try his absolute best in helping you overcome all these different emotions but he thinks revenge is pointless and so that's one thing he can't help you with.

Sadie

Sadie's been where you are. She unfortunately knows a lot about grief. However you react to the news, Sadie stands by your side.

If you’re angry and lash out, she’s there for you. If you’re sad and need a shoulder to cry on, she’s there for you. If you need someone to tuck you into your goddamn bed at night, then hell, Sadie will do that too.

Sadie is all for revenge. She knows revenge is bad but sometimes that doesn’t matter and what’s important is getting closure. Not only that but she thinks revenge might be a good motivator to help you get back on your feet.

But right now she knows that you’re not ready to get revenge. The situation is too fresh. Sadie knows that the best thing to do now is help you through the grief and help you practice for when you finally kill the son of a bitch that’s responsible for this.

[vivithefolle]

I just wanna ask, and don’t get mad at me cause I’m genuinely curious, how do you stan Ron? Like, I like him, but he is definitely misogynistic (slut shaming Ginny, treating hermione like she owes him something and being mad that she kissed someone years before, always objectifying Fleur, and acting like girls who aren’t pretty aren’t worth much). Like, by DH I feel like he definitely has mostly grown out of it, but still 6/7 books he’s kinda unbearable IMO

how do you stan Ron? 

Like this:

OH MY GOD HAVE YOU SEEN. HAVE YOU SEEN HIM DID YOU SEE MY BABY OH MY GOD. WHEN HARRY’S ARM HAD GONE KABLOOIE BECAUSE OF LOCKHART AND HE. RON. HE WAS. HELPING HIM GET DRESSED???? OH MY GOD BABY???? HHHHNNNNGGGG. AND. AND. AND ALSO WHEN HE. OMG. WHEN HE WAS PUTTING FOOD ON HIS FRIENDS’ PLATES LIKE. MOM FRIEND ALERT MOM FRIEND ALERT MOM FRIEND ALERT. AND THE WAY HE’S ALWAYS BLUSHING AND BEING EMBARRASSED AT THE SLIGHTEST PRAISE BUT ALSO HE’S SO DESPERATELY SEEKING IT BUT HE KNOWS HE CAN’T TAKE IT AND EEK EEK EEK THAT’S SO CUTE SOMEONE HOLD ME IT’S ADORABLE RONALD WEASLEY YOU ARE SO GOING TO BE THE DEATH OF ME IT’S ILLEGAL TO BE THIS CUTE!!!!

Ok and then.

he is definitely misogynistic 

No. And here’s why.

slut shaming Ginny 

Yes, that was wrong. And guess what, that’s also something he probably - scratch that, definitely - picked up from his mother. And also his brothers, recall how Fred and George too don’t like to see Ginny go around with boys. There’s also something to recall: Ron was there when Ginny was taken into the Chamber of Secrets and learned later that it was because she had trusted an older guy. You seriously wouldn’t be paranoid about who your sister dates after that? It was wrong. Yeah. And he more than learned his lesson when Ginny clapped back by virgin-shaming him and basically told him that he was childish because he hadn’t have a relationship yet. So would that make Ginny sexist too? Or is it just for Ron?

treating hermione like she owes him something 

..................... uuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhh... when? When the fuck did anything like that happen?

He made a prat of himself at the Yule Ball, that much is obvious. But he didn’t tell her anything like “you should be with me” or didn’t insinuate anything of the sort. He was a jealous bitch but kept attacking Krum, not Hermione.

If you mean in sixth year when he treated her with “icy, sneering indifference” for the course of two weeks, yeah that was bad but that’s not “treating her like she owes him something”, the fuck?

being mad that she kissed someone years before 

Yeah. I know. And that was bad, ooooh you got me to admit Ron did bad stuff, that’s what you want to see, right? And I reckon he was also mad that she hid it from him, and that he had to learn it from his sister of all people. We see Ron handles what he considers betrayals terribly. I have some meta discussing the possibility that he has a form of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.

always objectifying Fleur 

Um... no, he doesn’t. He makes a stupid comment about her once in GOF then stops. Let’s also fucking remember that Fleur is a Veela, she literally makes guys stare at her as part of her powers!! I’m not blaming her because she’s literally born that way, but you can’t blame someone who is under magical compulsion either.

acting like girls who aren’t pretty aren’t worth much 

So tell me why he was friends with Hermione then?

Because Hermione wasn’t Emma Watson the super hawt sexy model goddess. Hermione was Mrs Generic. Until this once at the Yule Ball when she got the pretty princess perfect Mary Sue makeover but then stopped because she had to remain ~relatable uwu~.

Again. Ron made stupid sexist comments. But it’s actively shown that he doesn’t follow up on them. If he did indeed live by the motto “girls who aren’t pretty aren’t worth much”, explain to me why he wasn’t simping and drooling all over Padma Patil who is explicitly stated to be one of the prettiest girls at school when she was his date? Why exactly did he ignore her and was a miserable twat the whole evening instead of basking in the joy of having snagging a girl that was “worth it”? Well surprise, it’s because HE ACTUALLY ISN’T LIKE THAT AND WHAT HE SAYS IS MAYBE SHIT HIS “COOL OLDER BROTHERS” SAY AND HE THINKS THAT BY EXTENSION IT WOULD MAKE HIM COOL TO REPEAT IT. MIMETISM, THAT'S BASIC FUCKING HUMAN PSYCHOLOGY FOR FUCKING TODDLERS MY FUCKING GOD.

Like, by DH I feel like he definitely has mostly grown out of it, 

............

...................................

...............................................................

so. so why. so why wouldn’t you. use that. as a reason. to stan him.

like.

fuck all the “hurr durr ron weasley the boy who made it out of the friendzone!!!!” bullshit, let’s start going with “Ron Weasley, the Boy who became a Man, and not one of those 'uugghh im such an alpha male’ ones but one that’s got the balls to say ‘hey love, I’ve got an idea, what if you kept doing that job you love and feel passionate about while I support you and do the majority of the childcare while also working a smaller job on the side so we’re never short on money’“

Why you people gotta be “yeah I like Ron BUTT” when you know full-well this fucking awful fandom will rake him over hot coals over the slightest mistake he does - worse, will actively go out of their way to interpret his positive moments in the most negative way possible??? Fuck off with that bullshit. Ron dared to say bad stuff omygah big deal, he was forgiven for it all and you’re just all cowards looking to feel “pure” by telling yourself “oh yeah but he was problematic once uwu”. FUCK. THAT. NOISE.

but still 6/7 books he’s kinda unbearable IMO 

And IMO he’s not, funny how that works

So.

I guess it’s impossible to stan Ron because he was problematic uwu.

Ok.

Then I hereby decree that it’s impossible to stan Hermione Granger because:

“I’ll bet you wish you hadn’t given up Divination now, don’t you, Hermione?” asked Parvati, smirking. [...] “Not  really,”  said  Hermione  indifferently,  who  was  reading  the  Daily Prophet. “I’ve never really liked horses.” She turned a page of the newspaper, scanning its columns. “He’s not a horse, he’s a centaur!” said Lavender, sounding shocked. “A gorgeous centaur . . .” sighed Parvati. “Either  way,  he’s  still  got  four  legs,”  said  Hermione  coolly.  “Any-way, I thought you two were all upset that Trelawney had gone?” - Order of the Phoenix, ch 27

wow casual use of a racial slur yay!!! A+

And it’s also forbidden to stan Harry Potter either since:

It was raining hard now, and she was nowhere to be seen. He simply did not understand what had happened; half an hour ago they had been getting along fine. “Women!”  he  muttered  angrily,  sloshing  down  the  rain-washed  street with his hands in his pockets. “What did she want to talk about Cedric  for  anyway?  Why  does  she  always want to drag up a subject that makes her act like a human hosepipe?” - Order of the Phoenix, ch 25

and

“Harry! There you are, thank goodness! Hi, Luna!”  “What’s  happened  to  you?”  asked  Harry,  for  Hermione  looked  distinctly  disheveled,  rather  as  though she had just fought her way out of a thicket of Devil’s Snare.  “Oh,  I’ve  just  escaped  —  I  mean,  I’ve  just  left  Cormac,”  she  said.  “Under  the  mistletoe,”  she  added in explanation, as Harry continued to look questioningly at her.  “Serves you right for coming with him,” he told her severely.  “I thought he’d annoy Ron most,” said Hermione dispassionately. “I debated for a while about Zacharias Smith, but I thought, on the whole —”  “You considered Smith?” said Harry, revoked. - Half-Blood Prince

Victim-blaming! Nice Harry, nice. Always classy.

Ok, Ginny stanning is already cancelled because she virgin-shamed Ron, right, so who’s left, who’s left... ah yeah:

“There you go,” said Fred proudly. “Best range of love potions you’ll find anywhere.” - Half-Blood Prince

Selling date rape drugs proudly ouh là là. Bye Fred.

"Do they work?” she asked.  “Certainly they work, for up to twenty-four hours at a time depending on the weight of the boy in question...”  “...and the attractiveness of the girl,” said George, reappearing suddenly at their side. “But we’re not  selling  them  to  our  sister,”  he  added,  becoming  suddenly  stern,  “not  when  she’s  already  got  about five boys on the go from what we’ve...”  “Whatever you’ve heard from Ron is a big fat lie,” said Ginny calmly, leaning forward to take a small pink pot off the shelf.

Assuming that only girls use love potions, and only on boys. Men never rape in JKR’s world, only women do, you heard it from George Weasley here folks, I’m just passing on the message. Ah and I hope you’re also starting the Fred And George Hate Club given how he’s also slut-shaming Ginny.

“What’s this?”  “Guaranteed  ten-second  pimple  vanisher,”  said  Fred.  “Excellent  on  everything  from  boils  to  blackheads,  but  don’t  change  the  subject.  Are  you  or  are  you  not  currently  going  out  with  a  boy  called Dean Thomas?” “Yes, I am,” said Ginny. “And last time I looked, he was definitely one boy, not five. What are those?”  She  was  pointing  at  a  number  of  round  balls  of  fluff  in  shades  of  pink  and  purple,  all  rolling  around the bottom of a cage and emitting high-pitched squeaks.  “Pygmy  Puffs,”  said  George.  “Miniature  puffskeins,  we  can’t  breed  them  fast  enough.  So  what  about Michael Corner?”  “I  dumped  him,  he  was  a  bad  loser,”  said  Ginny,  putting  a  finger  through  the  bars  of  the  cage  and watching the Pygmy Puffs crowd around it. “They’re really cute!”  “They’re  fairly  cuddly,  yes,”  conceded  Fred.  “But  you’re  moving  through  boyfriends  a  bit  fast,  aren’t you?”  Ginny turned to look at him, her hands on her hips. There was such a Mrs. Weasley-ish glare on her face that Harry was surprised Fred didn’t recoil.  “It’s none of your business. And I’ll thank you” she added angrily to Ron, who had just appeared at George’s elbow, laden with merchandise, “not to tell tales about me to these two!”

Ah, good on you for defending yourself, Ginny, but remember, Ginny stanning is prohibited because she’s been problematic in the past and is gonna be problematic in the future and that’s baaaaaaad. Careful kids, don’t get ideas. It’s problematic to like people who’ve done problematic things.

So I guess nobody can like anything or anyone now. Sorry guys. Liking things is evil, what if the thing you liked had, OR USED TO HAVE, *gasp* flaws, can’t take that risk, ohmygah.