#honestly i love being tagged in shit so thank u x)))

[loserlvrss]

꒰ 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐄 ꒱ 박성훈

summary : you and your boyfriend were too much alike in a lot of aspects, especially stubbornness

genre : angst, suggestive, sunghoon x afab!reader, drabble tws : language, suggestive content, arguments author notes : this ones for my wife xx word count : 0.6k

"sunghoon," your thumb and index finger pressed to the bridge of your nose in an attempt to ease the tension coursing through you. "you're not listening right now."

truthfully, neither one of you wanted to hear the other out—and that's resulted in an argument. one that seems like it won't fizzle out no matter how much the two of you raise your voice.

you both had too much pride to give the other the last word. you were too much alike; your friends and family only confirming your hard-headedness. but, you had to admit that he was pretty when he was mad.

"no, y/n," he laughed, humor twisted with frustration and disbelief. "you're not listening. i have to do this, it's not something i can just skip—believe me!"

you rolled your prettily-done eyes, which only furthered his annoyance, slumping into the wooden chair you paired with your pine table. "i don't care that you made other plans—we decided months ago. we have to go, sunghoon, we've already canceled... twice!"

"and now i'm saying that i can't go. you can go by yourself, can't you? it's not a big deal, is it?"

your mouth practically hit the floor at his audacity. "it is a big-fucking-deal, babe! i need you there, you know this!"

and despite being mad at each other, the love was still there. he drove you up a wall, but at the end of the day, there's no one else you'd rather have push your buttons. yes, it was a hostile environment right now, but it was bound to break; it always does.

"well, i can't go."

your head met your hand, elbow pressed to the table. "fuck," you were going around in circles, neither one willing to compromise. "sunghoon, how many times do i have to tell you that i don't care? you promised the last time we canceled that that would be the last time. so, you just lied to me?"

it seems like fuel to the fire was the only thing you both could throw at it, poisonous words with a twisted tongue. "oh my god, are you kidding me? you're really going to fucking hold that to me, baby?"

your eyes widened, hand hitting the wood with a smack. "well, when i promise you shit, i actually mean it. so, yeah, i'm going to hold it over your fucking head."

"we're getting nowhere." he stated the obvious, making you huff. "let's talk later."

he wasn't asking, but you honestly didn't have a care in the world for it; to you that was just as good as a suggestion. you got up, approaching him with a calm demeanor. you didn't want to back down, but you knew you'd be here for a lifetime if you didn't let the dust settle—even if only a little bit.

as you were passing, you mumbled out a defeated. "fine, hoon. do whatever you want."

you felt a firm grip on your wrist, him pulling so you'd face him again. and before you got the chance to angrily-question his intentions, his lips were pressed to yours, a firm, yet gentle, hold on your cheek.

you both felt the wire snap, your bodies relaxing into each other.

between alternating sides, he whispered a confession of love to you; reminding you that despite the attitude, he was made for you.

you pulled back momentarily, still prideful enough to not let him have the last word. "i'm still mad at you."

"you know i'll make it up to you, baby," he smiled, hoisting you onto the wooden surface carefully, and slotting between your parted knees. "i promise."

but he was just like you, wasn't he?

reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!

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[toxic-libra]

moth to a flame pt.1 - csb (m)

pairing: soobin x fem!reader word count: 17.5k genre: friends with benefits-ish (he helps her with dating tips and stuff), angst if u squint really hard, smut, fluffy, inspired a bit by moth to a flame - the weeknd warnings: 3rd person pov (as always), mentions of reader in love with another guy (haechan <3), slight fwb dynamic, mature content (fingering, blowjob, deep throat, a tiny suggestion of masturbation, unsurprisingly a mention of big dick!soobin) tagging: @once27, @pageriviera, @gyuzlover, @kookley77-blog, @sendhelpiloveyeonjun

[a/n]: part two here.

Y/N knew from the beginning that being shy would ruin her life. In her defence, she wasn’t a shy kid… Not at all – she had thousands of friends and was ever so bold, leading her close group if they needed that extrovert-hand. Her first teen years still thrived in her social butterfly skills. However, something changed mid to late teens, and she hid inside her shell to never see the light again…

Well, until she met Soobin during college.

They had similar personalities, all drawn to quietness, refined tastes and interests. Y/N still remembered the shock on her face when Soobin said he wasn’t joining their friends at the end-of-the-semester party, simply because he wasn’t in the mood.

Which guy in his early 20s would skip a party and be honest about the reason behind it?!

She decided, then, that he was probably worth of getting over her shyness and befriending.

And now, four years later, they were still going.

Which brought her to the current situation: Lee Donghyuck.

Handsome, extrovert and Soobin’s gamer friend.

They met at a PC Bang, and somehow, clicked. Soobin wasn’t exactly antisocial, but he was shy, reserved and more on the quiet side, so getting close to a loud guy like Donghyuck in such setting was a welcomed surprise. Y/N looked at it as a sign to get out of her shell again, too.

But wanting to do it and doing it were two different things.

[19:06] y/n: where tf r u at

[19:06] binbin🐰: well some of us have stuff to do

jk i just got in

gonna shower and meet u in 15

She couldn’t help but grin, waiting.

The door lock rang with the noise of a password being typed. Seconds later, she heard his shoes being thrown inside the shoe-rack. Then, in a heartbeat, she was met with Soobin’s tall frame. When he saw her, his face broke in a pleased smile, while he rolled his eyes in faux annoyance.

“Now, what the fuck are you doing here?” Soobin took off his jacket, dimples still in full display despite his slightly harsh tone. “Are you that impatient?”

“Beomgyu and Mimi were doing a horror movie session, so we’ll have to do ours here.” She mused uninterested, laying back on the sofa again. “When I got home, they were already there, so…”

“Alright.” He sighed, opening a bit of his button-up. “I’ll wash up and see you in a minute.”

Her attention travelled from his face to his hands, wondering why men normally looked so good undressing themselves. “I’ll be waiting.”

Because, honestly, what else she could do?

Unblocking her phone, she scrolled through TikTok for a while, trying to distract herself. Her girl friends had warned her not to do what she was about to, suggesting she downloaded Tinder and got things over with, but Y/N just preferred to die than to use dating apps… Especially when she had means to try to catch Donghyuck by natural ways.

As soon as Soobin took his seat next to her, hair still damp from the shower and smelling his usual scent of vanilla and warm hugs – if that shit ever made sense –, Y/N felt her heart racing with expectation. It was such a risqué move, but she was desperate.

Somehow, all those years without male attention (in a romantic way) and her unbearable shyness started piling out, and it just got too much.

“Fried chicken and beer.” He mused. “You think of everything, thanks.”

“It’s not me, we’ve decided it yesterday.” She shrugged. “Which one are we watching tonight? We have three options: Kimi no Na wa, good ol’ Inuyasha, and finish that borderline pornographic and weird Kakeguri. Or, and hear me out, or you could finally listen to me once and give Ao Haru Ride a chance.” Y/N tucked her hands in a praying sign.

“I listened to you with Tokyo Ghoul, but only season one was good.”

“It’s because you’re tasteless! And you didn’t even try the manga!”

“You complained about the end in both.” He chuckled.

“B-but it’s because I was there for the gore and Ayato! But Ishida-sensei turned him into a softie…”

“This coming from the girl that only watches shoujo or josei.”

“Well, it’s your loss. Yeonjunnie and I just finished season three of Shingeki no Kyojin, and he’ll assure you I my recommendations are top tier.” She crossed her arms.

“I’ll watch it if you watch Jujutsu with me.”

“Fuck off.” Y/N groaned.

Another chuckle, and his dimples made an appearance. “What’s ‘Kimi no Na wa’ about?”

“Beomgyu said it’s a movie, and it was mind-blowing. Since we have similar tastes, I put it on our list.” She handed him her phone. “But if you’re in the mood, we can always watch Shin-chan.”

Quickly reading the synopses, he shook his head. “I’ll trust you and Beomy again.”

Her smile was enough to make him not care if their choice was good or not.

Y/N had planned to introduce her problem during their anime-party, but as expected, she was so invested in the movie that it escaped her completely. By the end of the animation, she was nestled on her side of the sofa, holding back a sob, teary eyes burning with the need to weep. As the credits appeared on the screen, she looked at her best friend, and her lips quivered.

“Oh God, you too?” Her voice sounded choked.

He had a tear or two rolling down his face, eyes red and glinting. “This was…”

“So beautiful! So tragically beautiful!” She stroked his damp cheek, collecting a teardrop. “Can’t believe you really cried… Beomgyu will holler when he hears about this.”

“So don’t tell him!” He pouted. “Why are you holding back? Your eyes are teary, too.”

“You know I hate crying. However, it’s been a while since I felt so touched by a movie that I almost gave in.” She giggled shakily. “Well, that was amazing.”

“Want something sweet for comfort? I baked Nutella bread.”

“Were you planning on telling me this at some point or…?”

Grinning, Soobin got up and went to the kitchen. “Honestly, I was trying to keep it low, because I don’t want Beomgyu eating them all.” His voice was muffled by the distance. “However, I can make an exception for you.” Since Y/N disliked skinship or anything that made her look weak next to any living thing, throughout years of friendship, Soobin noticed she often used food as comfort.

“When did you bake them?”

“Yesterday.”

“Makes sense.” She chuckled, remembering Beomgyu slept at her apartment, which was on the floor above. “Did his stomping annoy you? He did it on purpose.”

“I barely noticed, I was gaming with the boys.”

Oh.

Her heart skipped a beat, tongue tingling with the unspoken question.

“What did you play? Did you win?”

“Overwatch, and yes, I did. I mean, we did.”

“Who did you play with?” She really hoped her voice was tinged with normal curiosity.

“That you’ve met? Yeonjun and Donghyuck… Beomy was out, as you know.”

“Hmm… Of course, you guys would win, my Yeonjunnie never loses!”

“He almost fucked things up, though.” Coming back with a huge plate, Soobin took his place next to her once again. “Luckily, I had his back. Here, take a bite.” He held the bread in front of her.

Steading his wrist, Y/N did as instructed, biting into the soft dough and being quickly hit by a Nutella explosion. She half-groaned, half-chuckled as the filling stained her chin. Wiping it out with her finger, she sucked the spread and moaned in delight.

“Fuck, Soobin, you get better every time!”

His adorable dimples were on display, and his eyes twinkled with satisfaction. “Right?”

There was a comfortable silence, each eating bread while the credits finished rolling.

Maybe that was the right time to ask him for the favour. Despite her best friends reasoning her not to mix business with pleasure, she just couldn’t think of anyone else to turn to. Also, if he rejected her, then she’d find something else, for sure. But, as for now, this was the best idea she came up with, and if one looked at it seriously, they’d understand it made perfect sense.

“So… I was thinking…” She started, licking her fingers clean.

“Please, don’t. It’s never good when you do!”

“Maybe when Beomgyu and I do it together, I admit, but when I do it alone…”

“And was this alone?” He cut her off, sceptical.

“Why, of course!” Y/N slapped his thigh. “Now, listen, I was thinking… About this guy… I have a crush on him, you know? And it’s been a while since it happened.”

“And?”

“And you’re friends with him... So, maybe if you could help me in this, I’ll be your slave for a week or something?! And by helping, I mean, act like a wingman and also teach me the things he likes, how to flirt with him, what to do when we finally get together, like… Intimate time and… It’d be like, for practice purpose, just so I build up enough confidence to grab his attention and ask him out.” Normally, when she was nervous, she’d start babbling nonsense. But that? That was a whole new level of nonsense. “No hard feelings if you don’t want to or anything. However, I’d really, really appreciate your guidance, because…”

“Stop! Stop!” His big hands waved next to his face, silencing her. “What the fuck are you on?!”

“I beg your pardon?” She frowned.

“Have you any idea of what came out of your mouth just now? Are you completely insane?” His eyes were wide, disbelief dripping in every word. “Y/N, I can’t j-just teach you stuff! This is something you don’t…” He paused, uncomfortable with the mere thought.

“What? If not you, then who? I don’t have a love life, Bin. I haven’t kissed a man in years!”

“I don’t know! Maybe Yeonjun? He’s sure more experienced and... H-he’s your darling dearest!”

“Are you insane?” It was her turn to ogle him as if he was an alien.

“Excuse me?”

“How can you even suggest that?!”

“Suggest what? Yeonjun?” Soobin rose to his full height, restless. “I don’t even know why we’re still on this topic; anyway, yes, he’s your favourite man on Earth, so just…”

“Precisely why he’s not even an option!” She cut him off. “How can you even suggest…!” She was baffled. “Oh my God, that’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard!”

“I don’t know if I should feel offended or relieved by your proposition, then.”

“No, no, no. You’re going about this in the wrong way!” Y/N groaned. “Yeonjun and I are like siblings, kindred spirits. The mere idea of being something other than it makes me feel weird.”

“But the idea of being intimate with me doesn’t? I’m not a kindred spirit to you too?!”

“It’s different.” She huffed, hesitating.

“Different how?”

“W-well, different! Different in a way you’re not a brother to me, but a best friend.” Y/N cringed at the words as they came out, knowing they didn’t sound like a compliment… But they were!

“God, you want me to help you with some guy, but somehow, I’m not even worth kindred spirit category?! You do have a way of making people feel special, Y/N.”

“Ugh, you’re making it sound like it’s a bad thing!”

“It is a bad thing, you lunatic woman!” Soobin shook his head, exasperated. “We’ll be risking our friendship, for fuck sakes! A boy and a girl can’t exactly remain friends after stuff like that.”

“Well, Yeonjunnie and I…”

“You didn’t ask Yeonjun this!”

“Well, if you don’t want to, you can just say it!”

“I just did!” He groaned, ruffling his hair again.

“Ok!” Y/N crossed her arms, pouting.

“Ok!” He mimicked her.

The silence, once comfortable, wasn’t like that anymore. She knew it could come to that result, but she really thought Soobin would say yes. Side-eyeing him, her heart clenched. They used to argue, for she was weirdly similar to Beomgyu in some ways (and he got in Soobin’s nerves often), but Y/N could never stay mad at him for too long.

“I was… It was… It was just an idea.” She relaxed her posture, offering the white flag first. “I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable… I was just desperate for a direction.”

Resting his head on the upholstered headboard, Soobin sighed, forcing his body to relax too. “I’m sorry I lost my temper.” He said. “Who is him, by the way?”

“D-Donghyuck.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that’s huge.” And he understood her crazy mind a bit more. “I can tell you what he likes, though.” He still stood firm against getting involved with her, but that much he could help.

“Can you?”

“I can’t promise it will work, but…” He shrugged.

“It doesn’t matter, I’d love to hear it!” She reached for him, tugging at his hand with a hopeful smile. “Any little thing you remember, I want to know them all.” Her thumb stroked his skin.

Upon feeling such unusual caress, Soobin looked from their joined hands to her face, lighted-up with a spark of adoration. How did it pass him that his best friend had a crush?! How could he be blind to such changes? Was he really so nonchalant towards others?

“How long has it been?”

“Pardon?”

“Your crush, how long has it been?”

“Almost two months.” It was the first time she blushed because of a real life guy in front of him, and Soobin found it unexpectedly fascinating. “Why?”

“I was wondering why I didn’t notice it before.”

“Well, I don’t exactly go around telling people about it, nor I’ve met Donghyuck enough times for you to pick up the way I become a mess near him.”

He grinned, finding that absurd. Y/N never became a mess near anyone; in fact, she rarely gave people more than three seconds of honest attention.

“You’re not gonna like this, but his favourite food at the moment is jangeo-gui.” His smile grew at her disgusted face. “Better start appreciating eels if you wanna make him happy.”

She rolled her eyes at his teasing, but urged him to keep going.

A week later

In that boring Thursday night, Beomgyu arrived with yet another huge bowl of sweets – this time, matcha and white chocolate cookies.

“It’s out of hand! Someone has to intervene!” He whined, giving it to Y/N. “It’s your favourite.”

“I’m not really into cookies, though.”

“But you love matcha and white chocolate, so wipe this out of Earth, please. I can’t stand looking at desserts anymore!” He pouted. “Soobin is so annoying! Why is he doing this to me?”

“Pretty sure you’re not his target in anything, Beomy, but go off I guess.” Mimi chuckled.

“Then why is he baking sweets non-stop?! He knows how much I like eating them.”

“Maybe he has a lot on his mind, you know he does that when he’s thinking.” His girlfriend shrugged, eyeing Y/N. “Do you have anything to do with this or is it just a coincidence?”

“Me?” Y/N widened her eyes, faux surprise laced in her tone. “Why would I?!”

“I wonder.” Mimi quipped.

“Beomgyu!” Y/N turned to her friend.

“I can’t help, sorry.” He raised his hands in surrender.

“Yeonjunnie would!”

“Of course, he’s your darling dearest! I don’t even come in second, Soobin is there.”

“That’s not true!” She pouted. “You’re Mimi’s boyfriend, I couldn’t possibly put you in first! Besides, despite obvious reasons, you’re my favourite girl friend.”

“I hate her.” Beomgyu looked at Mimi. “I truly do.”

“How can you say that when we’re literally the same person?!” Y/N’s pout grew bigger. “Well, since I’m not cared for here, I’ll go to someone who-”

“Soobin’s not home. He went out with Yeonjun.” Beomgyu cut her off.

“Where to?”

Mimi raised an eyebrow at Y/N. The fact that she didn’t know Soobin’s schedule was enough for her to suppose the eldest one did ignore everyone’s warnings and went on with her crazy plan. And by Y/N’s intentional gaze on Beomgyu (avoiding hers), Mimi didn’t even need confirmation.

“A PC Bang. Actually, I’m quite late myself.”

“Are you going there too?”

“Nah, I’m staying home.” He stood up. “Got your things, babe?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

“Wait, you’re leaving too?”

“Yeah, I’ll sleep there.” Mimi agreed. “Enjoy your batch of cookies and stop messing with Soobin’s head. Haera said she’ll drop by to install our cabinet, so pay attention to the doorbell.”

“Ok.” Sighing, Y/N took a cookie. “I’ll be all alone and miserable because my friends either hate me or are too busy to hang out with me.”

Beomgyu’s giggle infuriated her, and she cursed Haena and Felicia for not living in the same building. At least, if Hae really showed up, she’d have company for dinner.

It was past eleven when Y/N’s front door opened. She was tucked on the sofa, the plate with 5 matcha cookies already empty, jokingly wallowing in pity for being left out, throat tight and eyes burning with the need to cry – not for the light-hearted drama she made, but for the anime movie she watched. If she wasn’t so intended in pretending to be mad at Beomgyu, she’d text him and recommend ‘5 Centimetres per Second’. It was always gut-wrenching to deal with open endings, and by reviews, this one wouldn’t be as optimistic as Kimi no Na wa’s. At this point, one would wonder: why did she keep watching sad movies if she didn’t want to cry or feel sad?

Obviously, she wanted to challenge herself and see until when she could take it.

Before the first teardrop could break through her resolve, the electronic door-lock rang, and she sat down, surprised. Pausing the movie, Y/N searched for her phone… Haena hadn’t called, but the seven missed calls from ‘Darling dearest’ and three from ‘Binbin’ warned her beforehand.

“Yeonjunnie?!” Whoever looked at her wide grin now could never guess she was about to cry milliseconds ago. Rushing towards the man, she hugged him tightly.

“Hi, darling.” Yeonjun kissed her head. “Watcha doing? Why didn’t you pick up?”

“I was watching a movie.” Y/N gestured to the living room. “Wanna come in?”

“We’re already in, but I just dropped by to see you for a bit. I’m heading home.”

“I’ll crash here, though.” Soobin stated. “Beomgyu’s sulky because we lost and he’s blaming me… I don’t want to deal with his complaints, so I’ll spend the night. Is it ok?”

“Of course.” She agreed. “Don’t you want to stay too?” Her fingers pinched Yeonjun’s arm slightly, and Soobin wondered why she was always so quick and sure in wrapping herself around their friend, but when it came to him or anyone else, Y/N was distant.

“Nah, then we won’t get an hour of sleep.” He chuckled. “You’ll talk my ears off, and Beomgyu already did it… In screaming fashion.”

She grinned. “Looks like he wanted to piss everyone off today. I’m mad at him too.”

“That’s new. What happened?”

“He said he’s not my first option, so he didn’t defend me when I needed him to.” She shrugged, scrunching her nose a bit. “You would jump down anyone’s throat for me, wouldn’t you?”

“Without hesitating.” Yeonjun agreed. “We both would, actually. And that’s why we’re better than Beomgyu, so don’t sweat it. I’m leaving.” With another kiss on her head, he pinched her cheek and moved to the door, eyeing Soobin with a raised eyebrow. “Bye, bro.”

Soobin waved, sighing. “See ya.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay? I’d love to have a sleepover with my darling dearest and my Binbin.” She tried one last time.

“Not tonight, darling. I really need some rest.” Yeonjun lied, going out.

Truth be told, Y/N didn’t mind it that much. Her real problem was the white elephant that still lingered in the room when she was alone with Soobin.

He ignored her for the whole week, and she didn’t blame him. Y/N ignored him too. They played safe while he listed what Donghyuck liked or not, but after the topic died, she was annoyingly embarrassed, and soon excused herself home. It was their last conversation up until now. She kept herself busy during the whole weekend, then, thanks to her job, she didn’t have much time to spare until tonight. When Beomgyu told her Soobin was out with Yeonjun, her stomach did flip in relief, for she wouldn’t have to show up in his house out of nowhere, just so their friends wouldn’t notice something definitely wasn’t right with them.

She was never shy near Soobin, and he most definitely wouldn’t pretend she didn’t exist.

But he baked non-stop, leaving her a bit guilty. In a moment of repentance, she opened Instagram and followed Hyuck. Maybe she didn’t need to bring Soobin into her messy though eventless love life. Maybe she could woo Donghyuck without his (or anyone’s) help.

Facing the floor, she took a deep breath and tried to put on her best expression.

“So… Are you hungry?”

“I had dinner at the PC Bang.” He took off his shoes, taking his pair of slippers that were there.

“Oh, I see. Then, what do you wanna do now?”

“Freshen up and skincare, maybe?” Soobin suggested.

“You already know the way.” She gestured towards the rooms. “I’ll clean this up and meet you in a second.” Taking the plate, she wondered if she should tell him about the sweets. However, Soobin was already moving, and silence kept her company.

Turning off the TV, Y/N rushed to the kitchen.

There was an unsettling feeling in her stomach. He couldn’t possibly be there just because his roommate and best friend was annoying – if so, he would’ve slept in her house almost every day. And he wouldn’t most likely show up unannounced, not after what happened to them a week ago.

Which drew her to the only conclusion left: he wanted to talk to her about that.

All the baking, the ghosting, the uneasiness… Soobin had been thinking.

The bathroom had the door opened, and Y/N caught a glimpse of him in his grey sweatpants and white shirt, already changed for bed. She rested against the doorframe, unsure of the silence, but not wanting to push any buttons before reading his mood.

“Are you not joining me?” He asked, bringing her out of her trance.

“Oh, I… Of course.” Stepping in, she took his side, watching themselves in the mirror. Soobin was tall and lean, his black hair was tossed to the back thanks to her hairband. He looked tired, which only added to her guilt. “Did you and Yeonjunnie have fun tonight?”

“Yeah, it was nice.”

“I’m glad.”

He didn’t say anything else, and Y/N felt discouraged. After brushing her teeth, she started her routine and he left, saying he’d wait her in the bedroom.

To say she took her time was an understatement. She was afraid of being alone with him and that awful atmosphere around them.

However, she couldn’t spend the night in the bathroom.

Soobin wasn’t lying on the floor like he used to. He was sitting on her desk, doing something on his phone, but as soon as she showed up, he put it down.

“You couldn’t find the mattress?” She wondered.

“I was hoping we would sleep together.”

Y/N froze.

What the actual fuck?!

“I beg your pardon?”

“I meditated about your request… About Hyuck and all,” He looked at her. “and I accept it.”

If there was one thing Choi Soobin never failed to amaze her, was in his straightforwardness. He had a really non-conflict, introspective and introverted personality… But, boy, when he decided to speak his mind… He didn’t play around. When he reached his resolve, that was it.  

“O-oh.” She was flabbergasted.

“So, how is this going to work? We’ll schedule classes?! Go with a more ‘unserious’ approach?”

God, he was…

Overwhelming, sometimes.

“I-I didn’t think much past the need to be helped.” Y/N confessed, feeling her mouth dry. “And you had declined before, so I just… Kind of ignored everything.”

The unsettledness in her stomach was annoying and embarrassing. She knew better than asking him if he was sure – he would never go back to this topic and change his mind if he wasn’t.

“Well, we need a plan, don’t we?”

“Yeah, sure.” Agreeing, her face coloured. “But I’m sorry, Bin, I know I requested it… But I’m not exactly in the mood to… You know… Get intimate tonight.”

“What?” He frowned.

“Don’t get me wrong, you’re handsome and all, b-but… I think I need a bit more time to…”

His chuckle announced his dimples. “Wait, did you think I was asking to have sex with you?!”

“Y-you said ‘I was hoping we would sleep together’!” She retorted, defensive. “We never slept in the same bed, so I... Y-you just had agreed with it and I…”

“I wouldn’t be so tactless, Y/N.” He cut her off, that easy smile still on his lips. “Even if it’s not our main purpose here to woo each other, I’d be more romantic about it.”

Y/N gulped, wondering why the perspective now made her feel… Bothered.

“Ok, let’s end this conversation here. I’m turning off the lights.” She reached for the light-switch. “So fucking awkward, oh my God! What did I have in mind?” Her whisper still could be heard.

“You want to back off? I can just play cupid.” He offered.

But there was no use him playing wingman if she would still feel insecure.

“No.”

“Then lay down and try to relax. Donghyuck is pretty touchy, so you have to get used to someone invading your personal space.” Soobin took his side of the bed, staring at the ceiling. “How is that you can’t leave Yeonjun alone, but when it comes to anyone else, you look uncomfortable?”

“I honestly don’t know. As far as I’m concerned, it’s always been like that.” She shrugged. “I also like it when you hug me and stuff, though you don’t do it often.” Y/N was thankful for the dark, ‘cause this way he wouldn’t catch her blushing (again).

“I thought you didn’t like it, so I held back.”

“Well, I do.” Y/N felt his body warm next to her, pulling the covers over them.

Soobin turned around, facing her profile. His hand found her arm, tracing her skin while going up and down. There was something heavily intimate about the way her breath caught, and he felt his chest tighten at the quiet sound. “Is this alright?”

“Yes.”

“Tell me about the movie.” He asked, knowing some distraction would help ease her out.

“It’s an open ending like ‘Kimi no Na wa’, but from what I understood from the reviews, it doesn’t hint at happiness.” She turned to him, too, and his hand slid to her waist. “B-Bin?”

“But what is the plot? Why did you decide to watch it?” His fingers explored from her waist to her back, urging her closer. “C’mere, I wanna hug you.”

Hugging Choi Soobin was one of a mortal’s most preferred activities, she was sure. On the rare occasions they hugged, Y/N almost melted against him. He had the perfect amount of comfort, warmth and strength… And, again, he smelled so good she wanted to truly dissolve into him.

“It’s divided in three parts.” She moved, being caged by his arms. “W-what should I do now?”

“Hug me back, silly.” He chuckled, and her face was pressed against his chest, letting her feel the vibration of that cute sound. “Keep going, don’t get distracted by this.”

“Easy to say, since you like skinship!” Y/N groaned.

“You’re reading too much into it, it’s just a hug. Relax.” His big hands kept moving on her back, scratching it slightly, like her mom used to do when she was younger and had trouble sleeping.

“Fuck, I must look so pathetic right now.” She looked up, meeting his eyes.

It was dark, the city lights doing a poor job of brightening the room a bit, but Y/N could still see the gleam in those soft boba eyes of his. The blush on her face deepened, heart skipping a bit. Could it be that because it had been so long since she was in a man’s arms (that wasn’t Yeonjun), any minor interaction would have her mind running wild?! Because she felt so confused in how to behave there – should she mimic the caress? Should she rest her face next to his neck, or keep it where it was? Should she turn around and be the small spoon?

“No, you don’t.” His voice was slightly hoarse. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long, but I didn’t know how you’d react. It was really hard to spend anime nights feet apart.”

The confession took her by surprise. “Why is that people care so much about skinship?”

“I’m not sure, but to me, there’s some kind of next-level comfort in it.”

“You’re just touch starved.” She rolled her eyes, noticing his smile widening. Such a pity the dark shadowed his dimples! “However, I’ll admit it’s quite nice.”

“Better than Yeonjun’s?”

“Oh, know your limits.”

Now he laughed, and his body shook a little, grip tightening in reflex. Y/N swallowed the truth: hugging him had absolutely nothing to do with hugging her darling dearest… And it was scaring.

Three days later

Donghyuck offered her a beer and winked. She felt her heart clenching, forcing a smile back.

It was the fourth time she met Hyuck out of a PC Bang. Sometimes she’d join Soobin there, not to play any games he liked, but just to be out of the house a bit. Tonight, she wasn’t feeling like staying home, but didn’t want the noisy mess of the PC Bang… So, her amazing friend suggested they met for chimek after he finished his hours there.

Therefore, here she was, sat between his tall body and Yeonjun’s comforting presence, staring at the guy in front of her with heart-eyes and rosy cheeks… Thankfully, she could blame the alcohol.

“Oh, thank you.” She hoped her voice was steady.

“I saw your Stories yesterday about the Flying Yoga class.” Hyuck grinned. “Soobin aced it.”

“He did, didn’t he?!” Her face relaxed into a more natural smile.

“I still feel my crotch burning and my leg circulation being cut out.” Yeonjun laughed.

“If I was there, I’d be like Beomgyu and scream the whole time.” Donghyuck commented. “I still can’t believe he agreed to it.” The grin on his heart-shaped mouth was enough to make her gulp.

God, she wanted to kiss that man so fucking bad it was embarrassing.

“The instructor didn’t appreciate it, but it made the pain bearable because I got distracted laughing at him.” Y/N replied, not wanting to waist a second without engaging with him.

“I might’ve been the MVP, but Y/N has the best flexibility.” Soobin said, letting his hand rest on her thigh and giving her knee a pinch. “She does Pilates, you know?”

Donghyuck looked at her, interested. “Oh.”

“Do you play any sports, Hyuck?”

“A bit of football, badminton… But nothing too extreme.” He shrugged. “I invited Soobin once to join my football team, but he said he preferred not moving an inch from his bed.”

“He’s a homebody, unfortunately. I had to almost cry in order to drag him to the class.” She chuckled. “I bring him to the gym two to three times a week, but he whines all the time.”

“I might try Pilates with you if you want, sounds quieter and easier.” Soobin offered.

“Tsk, he got so cocky after the Flying Yoga episode.” She playfully rolled her eyes.

Before they could comment on anything else, the waiter brough their fried chicken. As always, a variety of flavours were ordered, so they could indulge without restriction.

Something shifted between them.

Soobin noticed it during dinner – not when Y/N begged him to ‘teach her’ to flirt and all that. His lingering touches might’ve just cracked open something inside her, or a switch had been flipped and she was now a different person… Not that he was gonna complain. He absolutely melted when he took his hand off her thigh, and not a second later, she reached out for him again, linking their arms. And throughout the rest of the night, she just wouldn’t leave him alone.

Walking back home, she remained glued to him.

“Maybe we could’ve g0ne to the club with them…”

“You want to? I can take you there.” Soobin typed his password.

“Do you?”

“Nah.”

“Then I don’t, either.”

He chuckled, letting her inside first. “You’re funny.”

“If you think about it, it’s better this way. I wouldn’t know what to do if Donghyuck flirted with someone, and I’m not exactly ready to be on his radar yet.” She took off her shoes, sighing.

“What is it that you’re so afraid off?”

“I don’t know… It’s been so long and I feel like an insecure teenage girl.”

He hummed. “Well, lucky for you I exist.”

“I swear people assume you’re shy and introverted, but are not aware of your conceited ass.”

“The fact that I prefer being left alone doesn’t mean I’m ugly.” He shrugged, smirking. “You know, these dimples made a bunch of girls cry in high school and college.”

“So I’ve been told.” Y/N pretended to be unphased. “Are you gonna game now?”

“Nope. I think we should finally decide on our plan, no?” Soobin had to hold back another chuckle, for he found it funny that she was avoiding this talk when she was the one to request his help.

“Right now?”

“I don’t see a better time. C’mon Y/N, do you want Donghyuck or not?!”

“I do, but it’s embarrassing to be this inexperienced at my age and let people know about it!”

“Don’t think like that, there’s not a right time for this… People experience love when they have to.”

Her smile was shy, but she felt so glad Soobin was in her life. Not even once he made fun of her insecurities, he was respecting her boundaries and trying to get her off her shell slowly, so she wouldn’t be overwhelmed. Yeah, he did call her a lunatic before, but she could understand where he came from – if he was the one asking such favour, she’d react the same.

That’s why he was so right for the role.

“Thank you.”

His dimples broke in for the nth time, but it was different. This time, she felt the impulse.

“What?” Soobin frowned slightly, noticing her weird expression.

“N-nothing.” Y/N cleared her throat. “Just trying to remember if I brought back my clean pyjamas from home… Or else I’ll have to go upstairs to fetch one.”

“You did, I put it in my stuff. Let’s go, then.”

She gathered her thoughts, trying to reason with them. It made sense, albeit embarrassing. She spent the evening with Hyuck, and Soobin being the chosen one for helping her, it was only natural she’d feel some kind of magnetic force pulling her to him… They were about to discuss strategies that’d take her to Donghyuck. It was obvious she’d fantasise about kissing Soobin.

Because they would kiss each other… At some point.

Ever the gentleman, Soobin let Y/N use the bathroom first. She changed clothes, flossed, brushed her teeth and did her skincare. After that, she laid on his bed while he finished his night routine.

All the time, her mind spiralled between Hyuck’s playful smirk and a way to get it directed at her. He was such a funny guy, his aura pretty welcoming, and if Y/N didn’t spend the whole evening drooling over him, she’d notice how easy it would be to become friends with him – and then, she’d could try being something more. However, she’d just have to get rid of her shyness first. Nothing would work if she kept in her shell, insecure and afraid of letting her true self come out again.

“A penny for your thoughts.” Soobin wondered, slipping in the bed too.

Y/N shuffled to the wall, giving him some room. “How do I stop being shy?”

“Uh… If I knew, I probably wouldn’t be shy myself.” He grinned at her bored face. “But I think you either are born like that, or you get there through trauma.”

“I was born like that… But something happened and I withdraw completely… I can’t remember what, though.” She sighed. “Do you think Hyuck would mind if I’m quieter in the beginning?”

“I think he’d like someone calmer than him, yeah.” Soobin mused. “So, our plan…?”

She groaned, turning to face him. “What do guys like? How does one tickle their interest?”

“Hmm… It’s different for each guy, but normally having a pretty face and a pretty body do the trick.” He couldn’t help but chuckle, knowing she was getting annoyed. “But I know you already know this… So, we can try to find out if he thinks you’re pretty.”

“How?”

“Do you guys follow each other on Instagram?”

“Yeah, I followed him first.”

“It doesn’t matter. Did he like a picture or something?”

“The last posted.”

“Nice.” Then he frowned. “Fuck, Y/N, your last picture posted is from two years ago!”

“Well, yeah, but…” She pouted. “You know I’m not into Instagram!”

“You’re going to have to be more active, though. At least in the start, just so you keep fresh on his mind. Like, every time he opens the app, there you are.” Soobin smiled. “Do you have Tinder?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Well, maybe if you matched on Tinder, you could crack a joke or something… It can be a good topic. He might like a girl that jokes around like he does.”

She sighed, seeing his point. “But what if he isn’t there? What if–”

“He is there.” Soobin stated. “Now, we just need to know if you’d match. Where’s your phone? Let’s set your profile up right away.”

“You’re enjoying this now, aren’t you?” Y/N gave up resisting, touching the mattress, searching for the device. He giggled cutely when her fingers pinched his waist, and she couldn’t help but smile at him too. “Here, you were laying on it.”

She let him do everything, snuggling closer and breathing his sweet cologne, answering his questions whenever needed. Being this close to him was a whole new state of cosiness, and she was actually living for it. Yes, he was bony and thinner than she actually enjoyed, but Soobin was warm and soothing in a way that didn’t match his body.

He even decided on her profile picture, mumbling quietly that she looked pretty.

“Tomorrow we’ll continue this, ok?” Blocking her phone, he put it on the bedside table. “So, apart from Tinder and Instagram, what else?”

“Shouldn’t you be the one guiding?”

“Not like that, silly. I mean, what else are you insecure about? What do you think you’ll need me?”

“You already told me some of his preferences, so I feel confident enough to start a conversation… Well, if I stop drooling over him whenever he’s near.” She chuckled. “But… Bin, what do people do in a date? I’ve never been to one, you know.”

“Never?”

“Never.”

“Never ever?”

“Are you deaf?”

“Sorry, I’m just surprised. Why not?! Not even when you were in high school?”

“Well, I didn’t exactly give boys many signs I wanted to be asked in one.” She shrugged.

“Wow… I feel… Weird about this information?” He frowned. “So maybe we should focus on that, no? Like… How about we go on a fake date? I’ll try to find out what type of date Donghyuck usually goes and we mimic them, so it’ll be easier for you.”

“You’re the best, Bin.” Y/N pinched his arm, appreciating the effort.

“I know.”

A week later

A fucking amusement park.

Yeah, she probably should’ve seen it coming.

Not that she was upset by Donghyuck’s/Soobin’s choice… Maybe a first date wasn’t exactly supposed to be romantic at all, for people didn’t know if they’d click or not.

Everland was a good place, there were nice rides, sightseeing in a cute zoo and great food. Keeping it a secret from their friends, so they could come alone, both left home early – also planning to avoid the huge crowd for as long as possible, and to enjoy the day to the fullest.

As soon as they entered, Soobin suggested they bought a souvenir, so they could get into their couple persona. He chose a red panda hat, and she ended up with a normal panda one.

“What do you want to do first? See the animals, go for the rides or eat something?”

“We ate not an hour ago, Bin. Let’s see the animals, then we go for the best part.” She grinned. “I want to ride the Seater Human Sky for Zootopia. Can we?”

“Of course.” He searched for her hand, intertwining their fingers. “I’m sure Hyuck will touch you without hesitating, so I’m trying to behave like he probably will.” Not that he needed to explain himself, but he did anyway. “Let me buy these, and then we’re good to go.”

“Oh, alright.” Y/N gave him her hat. If he wanted to pay, she wouldn’t dodge out of politeness. This was a fake date, ok, but she should act like she would in a real one.

They visited all animals, spending almost the whole morning on it. Lots of pictures were taken, and although Y/N was used to talk a lot, she kept relatively quiet. Sometimes, they would look at each other and laugh, because it was funny to keep asking those first-base questions while already knowing the answers… And every time his dimples showed up or his huge hand touched her, she was reminded that it was her best friend there, not Donghyuck.

And, at some point, she messed up.

Maybe after they finished their tour in American Adventure and went for lunch… Or during the T-Express ride, for rollercoasters always lifted their spirits (and they were still high from the Rolling X-Train experience)… The way he was beaming with satisfaction made her stomach churn.

With the sunset colouring the skies, they left the park with an unsettling feeling.

The trip home was silent, with Soobin falling asleep as soon as the bus took off, and Y/N listening to her playlist, looking at the photos they took throughout the day and erasing those that were blurred or snapped by mistake. She sent one of Fu Bao to Yeonjun, knowing how much he loved the panda. Then, amidst cute animals, she found a video of Soobin’s side profile. He had his dimples on full display, and his… Cocky smile too?

Y/N could hear herself talking behind the camera, but she couldn’t make up the words, too startled by the realisation that he was really handsome. Closing the gallery app, she sighed and tried to get some rest too. There was no point in entertaining such thoughts.

Less than an hour later, they were walking back to their building. Soobin said he’d drop her off, like a gentleman would obviously do, and kept his hand on hers the whole two-blocks distance.

“Will you go up too?” She wondered.

“It’ll be too forward for a first date, won’t it?”

“Well, I don’t know? You do live here, after all.”

“But Donghyuck doesn’t.”

Donghyuck… Yeah, of course.

“Right.” She cleared her throat. “Then, goodbye. I had a lovely and funny time today.”

“I’m glad.” He smiled softly. “We should do it again.”

“I’d love that.” Y/N got on the tip of her feet. “Goodnight, Bin. I m-mean, Hyuck.” She kissed his cheek (more like his jawline) and almost ran towards the building entrance.

Pressing her floor number while trying to conceal her exaggerated and annoying heartbeat, any idea of peace vanished as Soobin’s tall frame occupied the other side of the elevator.

“I do live here, after all.” His voice was light, tinted with mirth.

There it was again, the slightly cocky, patronising smirk.

She looked at the ground, confused by her own reaction. They kept silent except for the usual ‘Goodbye’ when he arrived at his floor first.

Typing her password, Y/N entered her house feeling dizzy.

Something was wrong. Something was really wrong and she only had her celibacy to blame! Taking off her shoes, she sat down on the hall, ruffling her hair and groaning in exasperation. However, before she could give in to a tantrum, the doorbell rang. Confused, she opened it without checking. Her closest friends knew the password, but maybe…

Barely registering the black hair and known warmth, Y/N was pressed against the wall, Soobin towering over her, bringing her jaw up and smashing his mouth against hers.

Her body froze, mind going blank at the unexpected touch.

She remained unresponsive for a second or two, trying to overcome the initial shock. It was enough for him to back off, misunderstanding her lack of reaction. He was still a breath away, though, his nose bumping into hers as he looked her in the eyes.

“I’m sorry, I don-”

She cut the distance, kissing him again. Really doing it now.

Her arms circled around his neck, pulling him closer, moaning at the way his fingers tugged on her hair, tilting her face up. His tongue took advantage of her open mouth, slipping inside and starting its conquest. Y/N felt putty in his embrace, puzzled and consumed by the caress. She thought that those years of being romance-deprived would have turned her into an inexperienced girl once again, but it didn’t look like that.

She knew what to do, and her body seemed to understand it as well.

And even if she didn’t, it was clear Soobin did.

Shivering at the reminding of her kissing her best friend, something burned inside her. She felt bolder, nails scratching his nape and mingling with the soft strands of his hair. He groaned like a defeated warrior, pressing her harder between the wall and his body.

The whole fire made a known path, and Y/N snapped back into reality.

“Bin-?!” She pushed him away, gasping for air at the same time.

He looked at her through heavy lids, the light in the hall being enough to let her see his dark eyes gleaming with a mixture of emotions she also felt. Nevertheless, all that seemed to be swept aside when he blinked, a controlled and neutral expression taking over.

“Donghyuck would kiss you after the first date. I’m sure he would.”

And just like that, Soobin killed the spark.

The first contact after the events of the other night was awkward.

Upon feeling his hands on her, for their usual hug as a greeting, her voice cracked and her heart raced, the heat of embarrassment creeping up her spine. When their eyes met, her breath caught, remembering the way he looked at her seconds before shoving her right back in reality.

‘Donghyuck would kiss you after the first date. I’m sure he would.’

She was mad at herself for being mad at Soobin for saying that. Wasn’t finally being with Hyuck the sole purpose of all that?! Why was she a bit depressed he kissed her with that in mind?!

Was she so affection starved that she would start fantasising about Soobin now?

Pathetic.

“‘Seeing Fu Bao without my darling dearest to assert dominance.’” Yeonjun scoffed, showing her his phone – opened on her IG Story.

“She’s my rival, I had to.” Y/N shrugged. She had just posted one of Fu Bao’s videos from the date, because Soobin requested her to be more active on her social media. She’d added Hyuck on her Close Friends, hoping it would be a good hint of her true intentions.

“Your rival?” Yeonjun frowned.

“You love her a lot… It bothers me.”

“You love Soobin a lot and I don’t consider him my rival.”

“It’s different!”

“Why?”

“I don’t love him like I love you.” Y/N pouted.

“She’s so open about her favouritism.” Haena chuckled. “Sorry, Soobs.”

“I’ve been warned about this before, so I’m kinda numb to the pain.” Soobin jested. “It’s not nice losing to him, but I can manage being second.” He eyed Beomgyu. “At least I’m not third.”

“Well, I have a girlfriend and Y/N respects the fact my girlfriend is my favourite always!” Gyu retorted, a hand on his heart as if he felt offended. “And she can’t make me her favourite, either.”

“But you’re not the second, Bin!” Y/N pleaded, feeling her stomach sink a bit. “You’re…”

“Your best friend, Yeonjun’s your brother. Yeah, I know.” He commented, pouring himself some beer. “You told me that already.” On the day she asked him for that absurd favour… He was glad she seemed a bit ashamed of being biased, at least.

Y/N gulped, going quiet too soon. Normally, she’d argue, trying to make her point. Right now, though, she didn’t have the energy nor the facts to fight him.

Because things have changed.

More than ever, she was so painfully aware that what she felt for Yeonjun had nothing to do with what she felt for Soobin. She couldn’t even fathom doing more than some specific skinship with Yeonjun without feeling like committing incest… Whereas with Soobin, her mind entertained some different thoughts altogether – as outrageous as they should be.

It only took one kiss, and all the platonic, ‘academic research’ notion she had of Soobin crumbled.

She really believed she’d be immune to whatever happened between them, because Donghyuck was exactly what she wanted… However, she didn’t consider the impact of her celibacy. Y/N was painfully starved for attention and intimacy, and Soobin made her aware of that.

The sooner she got a grip of herself, the better.

That’s why she was there, pretending nothing had happened.

The second contact after the events of the other night was slightly better.

Soobin texted her saying he’d game with the boys, and asked if she wanted to join. Twenty minutes later, Y/N was lying on his bed, reading, while he played.

“What are we having for dinner?”

He looked over his shoulder. “I’ve no idea. What do you suggest?” He frowned. “No, not you. I’m talking to Y/N.” Soobin murmured to his headset. “Yeah, she’s here.”

Sitting on his bed, she stared at his computer screen as if he was on a videocall. “Who is it?”

“Hyuck says hi, Yeonjun is apologising for ignoring you on your chat.”

“I see.” She smiled. “Tell him I’m never talking to him again, and tell Hyuck I said hi back.”

“She’s not talking to you ever again, dude. And she said hi, Donghyuck.”

“Anyway, I’m thinking hot pot thoughts… Or sweet and sour pork.” Y/N suggested.

“Why not both?” He chuckled, listening to his friends on the call. “Yeonjun said you can’t spend more than thirty minutes ignoring him, so he’s not feeling exactly threatened.”

She sucked a breath, pretending to be offended. Crawling to the end of the bed, behind his chair, she turned him around and tugged at the headset, bringing the microphone closer to her mouth. “Is this a challenge, Yeonjun? Because I’d love to prove you wrong!”

“Wow, she said ‘Yeonjun’!” Beomgyu hollered, and she could hear his voice from his room.

“I’d feel pretty much threatened right now, bro.” Soobin stared at her, taking in the small distance between them. Their noses were centimetres away, breaths fanning over each other. His eyelids dropped as he tilted his head just a bit, unconsciously giving into her magnetic field.

As if electrified, Y/N stepped back. “B-both, then.” She cleared her throat. “Gonna order it.”

The third time, she met him at the entrance hall, after coming back from the gym. He was getting out of the lift and she was entering it – they collided, her sweaty head bumping into his chest.

“Fuck, sorry.” Y/N petted the moist spot, as if it’d disappear.

“Morning.” He smiled. “It’s ok, it’ll dry in no time.”

“Are you going to work?”

“Nah, going to grab something for breakfast… Wanna join me?”

Y/N wanted to melt on the floor, glad for the atmosphere between them not being awkward anymore. “Of course, if you don’t mind the stink.”

“I don’t.” He took her hand. “Morning.”

It was her time to grin, intertwining their fingers. “Morning, Binbin.”

The first tray of brownies was just out of the oven when Beomgyu walked into the kitchen.

“Am I going to have to eat all of it?” He pointed at the hot tray.

“Uh… No?”

“Why are you freaking out?”

“I’m not freaking out.”

“Dude, it’s been a week since you went back on your cooking therapy.”

Yeah, and it’d been a little over a week since he kissed Y/N.

It’d been over a week since they seemed to go back and forth on walking in eggshells. And he knew she was having some kind of mental breakdown due to that, ‘cause was he too.

Not that kissing her wasn’t riveting. It had been a while since he kissed a girl, and his body just reacted to that. He was intrigued by his own response. However, he was already regretting giving in to her schemes… Because he could foresee the imminent rupture in their friendship, could taste the awkwardness that was settling between them.

And yeah, maybe Beomgyu was right – he was freaking out.

He was panicking at the mere thought of losing his best friend.

“I just enjoy cooking, what is wrong with that?” Soobin knew he sounded defensive, but he wasn’t able to come up with a better rebut.

“Ok, keep telling yourself that.” Beomgyu rolled his eyes. “Is Y/N coming down? ‘Cause I’m coming up, Mimi and I will go to the arcade tonight.”

“Why would she come down?”

“Well, aren’t you guys working on getting her into Hyuck’s pants?”

Soobin froze. “What the f…”

“You really thought you two could keep this a secret from everyone?”

“N-no, but… You could use nicer words.”

Beomgyu tilted his head, pouting. “Aren’t you guys trying to turn her into a Sex Goddess?”

“Oh God, why do I even bother?!” Soobin shook his head, glaring at the ceiling for a brief second.

“I don’t know, either.” He chuckled. “Is she coming or not?”

“No.”

“Give her a piece, at least. I’m gonna get fat at this rate!” Turning around, he waved. “See ya. I’ll probably sleep upstairs, so don’t wait for me.”

Sighing, Soobin waved back. “Alright; have fun. Bye!”

He stared at the oven for a solid minute, contemplating what to do.

Whenever he had an opportunity, he’d mention Y/N to Hyuck. Things like how funny and pretty she was, something cute she did, a tender memory he had of her… And all those times, Hyuck listened with regard. But what use would that be if she still felt insecure?! That’s why he got a grip of himself and opened their chat – they should have another lesson.

[18:43] soobin: r u busy?

Almost a minute later, she replied.

[18:44] y/n: no… why?

[18:44] soobin: i baked two trays of brownie 🥺

[18:44] y/n: choi soobin

u r literally the best thing that has ever happened to me!!!!!

see u in a second

[18:45] soobin: 😋

It was pathetic that she took some time to get ready. Normally, Y/N wouldn’t even bother changing her clothes… However, she decided to drop her old and comfy nightgown for her brand-new pyjama set, an emerald-green satin shorts and button-down shirt. It was one of her favourite colours and Soobin used to say it looked really good on her.

Cringing at the perspective of fishing for compliments, Y/N pinched her cheeks and cleared her throat, walking out of the elevator as if each step didn’t make her confused mind a bigger chaos. Typing the password, she was greeted by the delicious smell of brownies. Heading to the kitchen, she took a second to prepare herself to face him again.

“Binbin?”

He turned around from the sink, opening one of his marvellous smiles. “Hi there.”

“So… Am I getting a whole tray for myself, or will I have to share with Beomgyu?”

“A whole tray for yourself… If you help me out here.” Soobin chuckled.

“Maybe sharing isn’t that bad?” She jested. “It keeps me humble.”

“Humbleness doesn’t suit you, Y/N. You’re made to look down on us, mere mortals.”

“That’s so sweet of you.” She pretended to dry her eyes, grabbing the kitchen towel.

“The only person you think is actually above yourself is Yeonjun, and don’t even try to tell me I’m wrong.” He nudged her with his elbow. “I know you better than I know myself.”

Y/N felt her stomach dropping.

Did he?

Was it possible he knew that whenever those dimples came out, she felt… The impulse again?

And because she was so confused with her own reactions, she decided to bring up the safer topic.

“Donghyuck asked me about the leather workshop class we took, he said he liked your wallet and you told him we went there and did it together.”

“I’m trying to bring you up in any opportunity I get.” Soobin agreed. “And what else happened?”

“Nothing much, we chatted a bit about it and then he said he’d try to book a class.” She sighed. “He didn’t ask for my number, Bin. It was the perfect excuse for it! Or he could’ve just said ‘Do you want to join me on it, again?’” She pouted. “I couldn’t find him on Tinder either!”

“I know it’s frustrating, but… Maybe we’re approaching this the wrong way?!” Finishing washing the last dirty dish, Soobin looked at her. “We need a party.” He declared. “Hyuck likes them, and if he sees you in a different light, with a different mood altogether, I’m sure he’ll get hooked.” By the way she hesitated, he knew exactly what was going on. “You’re insecure about it, aren’t you?”

“What if I mess it up?”

“That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”

Y/N stared at him, conflicted between playing it cool or being honest. They were best friends, for fuck sakes! She trusted him and he trusted her back – and getting him to help her was their main purpose, as he had pointed out.

“What do you have in mind, then?” She sounded so vulnerable Soobin’s heart melted.

But before he could say anything else, he needed to get some things straight. He wouldn’t survive going another week with that weird and distant vibe between them. This next lesson would be different from any other, and he needed to know she was ready to go through it.

That their friendship was ready to take the blow and don’t die from it.

“What did you feel when I kissed you?”

She froze. “I beg your pardon?”

“That day when we went on a date… When I kissed you like Donghyuck would, what did you feel after?” His eyes searched for hers, but she shied away, staring at the towel on her hand.

“I… Well… I noticed that I’m really desperate.” Y/N cleared her throat, hating the way she felt so small and embarrassed at her own neediness.

“Desperate for what?”

“Intimacy. Anything a man can give me.” The words came out rushed. “And it’s so annoying.”

He frowned at her confession. He expected her to say something along the lines like ‘desperate for Donghyuck’, but she didn’t. “Why is it annoying, though? It’s normal to want to be wanted.”

“Yes, I know, but… I feel like I missed my timing. It’s weird to never have dated at my age; and what if Donghyuck thinks there’s something wrong with me?!”

“Only stupid men think stuff like these, Y/N. Normal and nice boys know everyone has their own time to blossom and don’t rush nor judge others.”

She looked up, finding him already staring at her. His soft boba eyes shone with tenderness and resolve, as if what he said was the absolutely truth.

“You’re really a different brand of man, Choi Soobin.” She gave him a small smile. “And really one of the best things that has ever happened to me.”

“You flatter me.” He chuckled. “But I asked that because I think the best way for you to feel more confident is knowing that you can entice even when being ‘inexperienced’. ‘Cause, honestly, I didn’t even remember you hadn’t kissed a man in ages when we were kissing.” He confessed. “It just downed me later on, because things were awkward between us, and I got pissed off that we let it come to that and you didn’t tell me how you felt. I don’t like us distant.”

“Me neither.” She sighed.

“So let’s promise we won’t be like that again, or else I can’t help you.”

Y/N bit her lip, hesitating again. “But what if I can’t…”

“Then we’ll end everything.” He cut her off. “I don’t read minds, Y/N. If you don’t tell me what’s bothering you, how can I be of help?!”

“Alright. I’ll try.”

“No, darling, you’ll do it.” He shook his head. “I’m not letting our friendship on thin ice anymore.”

“Oh, ok, Bin! I’ll do it.” Rolling her eyes, she stuck her pinkie up.

“Good girl.” Their fingers touched. “So no more awkwardness no matter what we do.”

“And if one feels uneasy, we got to be vocal about it.”

His eyes darkened slightly, wondering (without his own permission) about what else Y/N would be vocal about. Clearing his throat, he pointed to the brownies. “Fancy some before we move on?”

“Yeah, it’ll be good to ease me up.”

“I wanted to put caramel in, but you complained about eating too much candy recently and I know how you love caramel, so I decided to make it plain, so you won’t feel sad if you don’t eat much.”

She smiled, touched by the gesture. “Thanks.”

“Here, take a bite.” He offered a piece.

It wasn’t something unusual, they normally did this… However, this time her eyes spent a little longer analysing his hand – the pretty and veiny forearm, how the brownie looked so small compared to his palm, how close his fingertips were from her mouth… And suddenly, she could see herself in one of those luxury porn movies, where any minor action was made to entice – so, instead of taking a bite, she’d lick on his digits, sucking them as if…

Y/N almost stuffed the whole piece in her mouth, hoping its taste would erase such confusing and horrible thoughts. God, what she needed was professional help!

Soobin had a fond smile, always glad that she liked his food. “Easy there, love. You’ll get a whole batch for yourself.” Some crumbles stuck to her face, gathering on her lower lip and at the side of her mouth while she chewed. “Do you like it that much?! You got dirt all over.”

Y/N remained quiet while he dusted the crumbles off. She felt like melting under his touch and gaze, goosebumps blooming from her spine to her head. The brownie tasted good, obviously, but the sensations didn’t come from its flavour or perfectly gooey texture… Out of habit, he licked the tip of his fingers clean, and that’s when she noticed she’d been too silent.

“Sorry, you know I like sweets.”

“It’s ok. Having you acting like this strokes my ego.” The dimples showed up again as he grinned.

Her heart thumped heavily against her chest, and whatever sane thoughts she had, slipped off her mind when she got on her tiptoes and ended the distance between them.

She kissed him.

She was still kissing him.

And when his arm circled her waist, pulling her up against the kitchen counter, she wished she’d never stop kissing him at all. The hand on her face slid to her nape, fingers threading in her hair and tugging it slightly, pushing her chin up so they could change the angle. As they got closer, his hips came in between her legs, the arm around her waist slipped a bit under her pyjama shirt, and the feeling of his skin against hers was overwhelming.

It was also embarrassing, honestly.

They were still dressed, but she felt so warm, so desperate for more contact, more action…

Then, as if reading her mind, Soobin bit her lower lip while pressing his crotch against hers. That earned him a bittersweet response: she froze, hands gripping his shoulders and eyes widening.

“What happened?” He asked, mouth still on her.

“I-If we keep… We shouldn’t be doing this.”

“But isn’t stuff like this the reason you need my help?”

He was right, of course.

“I’m not sure how to… What should I…?”

“Maybe you could circle me with your legs?” He suggested. “If I was Donghyuck, what would do?”

She gulped, musing. “I’d probably jump his bones.”

“Then jump mine.” He stated. “Pretend I’m him.”

Her eyes clouded, conflicted between obeying or trying to resist. “Here? At the kitchen?”

“We’re alone, relax.” At her intake of breath, he chuckled. “Try to, at least.”

“But won’t it be too uncomfortable?”

His grin grew bigger. “Y/N, you think too much.” He pecked her lips. “Stop thinking, just… Just feel.” His mouth touched her jawline, and she immediately closed her eyes. Soobin nibbled on her skin, leaving love bites on the column of her neck. It was impulsive, not really him wanting to mark his territory, but just… Him reacting to the moment. He quietly undid some buttons of her shirt, but before pushing it off, he needed to know if it was still ok. “Are you ok?”

Y/N was half in heaven, half in hell. “Yes… It’s so warm in here, isn’t it?”

“So can I take this off?” He touched the last button.

“Yes.” Their eyes met, and she hoped he could see the trust in hers.

Tossing the satin on the floor, Soobin’s attention flew to her chest. She was wearing one of her cotton bras, black and plain, but somehow… “You look so pretty in green, but now I realise you look better in black.” He murmured, kissing her cleavage. Her head fell back, a sharp breath that sounded more like a strangled moan coming out of her mouth. Her legs tightened around his body, silently telling him he was doing it right. “Shall I take this off too?” He traced the straps.

“Please.”

It’s been ages since a man had seen her naked, but somehow, the fact that it was Soobin put her at ease. Yes, she might’ve been feeling insecure, however, as they kissed, her neediness surpassed every other emotion… And it was Soobin, for fuck sakes! He was her best friend!

He unfastened her bra and let it loose. Discarding it too, he noticed his mouth watered a bit at the sight of her perk nipples – it was only natural that his big hands groped her boobs, slender and skilled fingers pinching the skin before he dipped his head down, taking one in his mouth.

The moan came out loud and clear, Y/N’s body jolting forward at the sensation. She felt his wet tongue around the beak, licking and sucking on it, his warm touch engulfing her from her waist to her ribs, then to her shoulders, fingertips burning figures everywhere they reached. And it was too much. Pulling at his hair, she brought their lips together once again, needing him, desperate for him. Her hips pressed strongly against his, humping him.

“Bin,” The nickname rolled out with ease, despite the fact she was supposed to imagine Donghyuck there. “Bin, I need more.” Her voice was muffled by open-mouthed kisses. “Please. More.”

And because he was such a gentleman, he couldn’t say no.

He actually didn’t want to.

“More of what? You gotta use your words, love. I want to help you, but I don’t know how.” He lied, touching her boobs again, loving how they felt under his palms.

“Fuck.” She kissed his jawline, legs so tight around his hips that he couldn’t escape her grip. “If we keep doing this, I’ll probably cum.” She tried to reason.

“Do you want to?”

“Desperately.”

His smirk was out of this world. He had that easy, roguish kind of smile, and Y/N felt her insides twirling at the sight. “How?” Although he was supposed to guide her in this, he wanted so bad to hear her desires. Soobin was sure he’d do anything she wanted as long as she kept that flushed expression and cute moans coming out. “Tell me how.” It was almost a plea.

“I-I’m not…” Well, he really was there to help her, so she shouldn’t be ashamed of asking for what she wanted. “I need your fingers.”

His breath hitched slightly, ears buzzing with every word echoing in his mind.

“My fingers? Where, love?” He knew he wasn’t pushing her too far. If she only could step outside her comfort zone a centimetre more…

And when she reached for him, taking one of his hands and sliding it down her belly towards her pussy, Soobin hoped he wouldn’t forget a second of that dizzy, surprising night.

“Here.” Her voice was breathy, laced with wanton and shyness. “Inside me.”

Oh, fuck.

Kissing her again, he rubbed her thighs, prying them open and unlocking them off his waist. He kept his touch pretty close to her crotch, but never coming too close to where she wanted.

“I’ll take off your shorts now, ok?”

She shivered slightly while he rolled the green satin off her hips. When the fabric was discarded, he analysed her, taking in every inch of exposed skin, and Soobin licked his lips, anticipating.

“No panties?”

“I only use them with pyjamas when I’m on my period.” She confessed.

His eyes widened, realisation kicking in. “So whenever we slept together, you were…”

“Pantie-less.” She agreed, blush intensifying.

“Fuck, Y/N.” He groaned, dick twitching at the thought. “So cheeky.”

“It’s healthy to let it breath!” She pouted, defensive.

“I’m not judging, though.” Soobin stole a peck. “I’m just surprised because I didn’t know.”

“Well, now you do.”

“Now I do, yeah.”

Their eyes met, and he couldn’t describe what he saw in hers. However, it was enough to make him react hungrily, latching his mouth on hers once more, a hand slipping between their bodies, resting right on her pretty cunt. She moaned into the kiss as soon as his fingers caressed her, pads gathering some slick before finding purchase on her clit.

It was rather embarrassing, but just the feeling of him there was enough to make her cum.

She felt so overwhelmed and horny she was sure if she stood up, a puddle would be where she sat, but the way Soobin worked her up was so good, she couldn’t help herself. And it’d been so long…

It was impossible to keep her focus, the pleasure so foreign and delicious – thus, she just rested her forehead against his, locking their eyes and basking in those amazing sensations. His hand drove slightly down again, coating in her wetness before plugging a finger inside her without warning. Her breath hitched, lips parting for a whiny moan to escape. His brown orbs, once gentle and patient, now ogled her with hunger and desire. He moved, testing the speed until he got a loud sob from her, hips bucking slightly as he drove in and off.

“Fuck.” She whispered when he quickly pushed a second digit inside her.

“Tell me how you like it,” Soobin ordered. “how to make you cum.”

“Anything,” Y/N closed her eyes, wondering if it would be ultimate humiliation if she drooled any time soon. “anything you do, I’m sure I’ll like it.”

“You’ve got no idea of what I…” He stopped, deciding she wasn’t ready for those words yet.

She gulped as he picked his pace. “Fuck, this feels so good!”

“Look at me.” His dominating aura was new to her.

She stared at those chestnut pools, darkened with a pinch of wildness, curiosity and lust. She’d never seen him like that, demanding, serious but at ease with himself, full of confidence and… So fucking hot. There was also the situation they were in, the unexpectedness of enjoying his touch, the thrill of doing something they probably shouldn’t be doing, the happiness of finally having a man’s attention for her own – she couldn’t control herself, clenching around his fingers.

“Shit,” Y/N threw her head backwards, back arching. “I’m gonna cum?”

“Is this a question?” He chuckled, amused.

“I’m not sure?” Her brows furrowed. “I’m almost…” He inserted a third digit. “There.”

“Already?” His dimples accompanied his smirk, and her heart beat faster. “So desperate, Y/N. You look gorgeous like this.” He cooed. “Keep looking at me and cum, then.”

Obeying was easy. Y/N was so out of herself with wanton it didn’t take more than a minute for her to explode around his fingers, moaning quietly and leaving small scratches on his nape and shoulders. Soobin peppered her neck with love bites while she rode her high, relishing the way she shook on his arms and snugged him close.

She tugged at his hair after calming down, pushing his chin up and getting nose to nose. It could be the post-orgasm haze, but she had the urge to say some crazy and cheesy things. Instead, she bit her lips, wondering what she should do next.

“Do I… S-should… Can I… Can I suck you off?”

And because she sounded vulnerable, he pushed past his own needs and tried to make her feel safe again. “I don’t know. Can you?” His eyes shone with mirth, the joke outdated and a bit annoying.

Her mouth tugged in a small smile. “May I?”

He wanted nothing more, but it seemed too much for her in one day, so he shook his head. “No, love. I think it’s best we go slow.”

“W-wait, why?!” She looked disappointed. “Don’t you… Want me to?”

“I do, love, I really do. But this is not about me.” He sighed. “This is about showing you that you can seduce any guy you want, doesn’t matter if you think yourself unexperienced or not… And judging by my pants now, I’m sure we can say you passed the lesson.”

Mentioning his pants wasn’t his best idea, because her eyes fell to his sweatpants and lingered there, glossy, hungry. He felt something clench around him and realised his fingers were still inside her. Blushing a bit, Soobin took them off, musing if it would be too extreme to lick them. However, he was trying to avoid getting hornier, so maybe…

Before he could react, the oven beeped, warning them that the last tray of brownies was done.

If one year early someone told her she’d dream about her best friend’s dick, Y/N would die of laughter. Now, sweaty and frustrated, she woke up for the second time in two days ten minutes before her alarm set off… Thanks to a wet dream.

With Choi Soobin.

It was upsetting, really. She couldn’t stop thinking about it – couldn’t stop wishing he had let her help him too. Because his kisses and his fingers had made her feel so good, so it was only natural to want to return the kindness… Although, a tiny bit of her was thankful he set boundaries, for she wasn’t sure she could handle what would’ve happened. The way he said she left him with a hard on was enough to make her mouth dry, heart skipping a beat in some sort of… Elation. She felt proud, desired… Feminine. And it had been ages since she last felt such emotions.

It was dangerous.

Choi Soobin was dangerous, and she should thread him carefully.

She went to the gym, wasting her energy on the weights and cardio. Maybe if she got too tired, her body would finally let go of that ridiculous desperation towards her best friend. The mere thought of having his hands on her again, of having her hands on him too… She almost tripped on her feet while leaving the gym. Chuckling at her own embarrassment, she started walking back home.

Then, her phone chimed with a notification.

Breathing slowly, Y/N unblocked it.

[08:12]  🖤 💓 darling dearest 💓 🖤: good morning, darling

wanna grab breakfast?

im near ur house

[o8:12] y/n: good morning, my better half

i literally just left the gym dskflfksdkljsd

and im FAMISHED

as always, u read my mind

[08:12]  🖤 💓 darling dearest 💓 🖤: meet u at that bakery around the corner?

[o8:12] y/n: sureeee

With a satisfied smile, she was glad for finally spending quality time with Yeonjun. Since the whole ‘Trying to date Donghyuck’ thing, Y/N kind of prioritised Soobin’s company…

Now, she had a chance to be herself again.

The bakery they usually went when Yeonjun was with her was quite empty when she arrived. Getting a table near the big windows, she discarded her jacked and sat down, relaxing. Checking her e-mails, she quickly answered two urgent ones – which meant she could come to work a bit late, ‘cause her online meeting at 10am was cancelled.  

Soon, arms circled her neck and she heard the smack on the top of her head.

“Hello, darling.”

“Hello, dearest.” Y/N grinned. “Don’t kiss me when I’m sweaty, it’s gross!”

“I don’t mind it.” He chuckled, sitting in front of her. “Did you order something already?”

“Nah, I was waiting for you. What do you want?”

“Hmm… Coffee and something sweet. You?”

“Tea and something sweet.” She winked. “I’ll need scrambled eggs, though.”

“Milk tea?”

“You know me too well.”

However, instead of smiling back at her, Yeonjun frowned. “What’s this?” He pointed to the side of her neck, then down her collarbones that showed up a bit on her gym clothes.

“What?” Y/N tried to see what grabbed his attention.

“Is… It’s a fucking hickey?!” His mouth opened in pure shock, then stretched in a wide smirk. “Well, darling, you’re keeping secrets now?”

“N-no! It’s not like that!” She shushed him, flushing. “This is nothing.”

“Oh, really? Because all these years we’ve known each other, it’s the first time I’ve seen you with a hickey, so pardon me for not eating up your bullshit.” He rolled his eyes. “Soobin told me already.”

“Of course he did.” Y/N gritted her teeth.

“I mean, everyone kinda know there’s something going on. You guys aren’t exactly subtle.” Yeonjun chuckled, moving over the table to pinch her cheek. “Cuties.”

“There’s nothing going on! He’s just helping me out with…” Under his soft gaze, she hesitated.

“Is it still that excuse?”

God, she loved Yeonjun with all her heart, but sometimes… Sometimes he just really pissed her off. It was a rare occurrence, but when it happened, Y/N wanted to punch him right in the face.

“What excuse? He’s really helping me with Donghyuck.”

“I see.”

“You don’t believe me.” She pouted.

“I literally said ‘I see’!”

“You used your condescending tone.”

“It’s just because I don’t understand how him giving you hickies is gonna help with Hyuck, but don’t mind me.” He raised his hands in surrender. “So, how’s the conquest going?”

“Uh… Good. I mean, kinda good. We’re gonna try a new approach in a different ambient.” She sighed, not sure if she could voice out what happened two nights ago. “In a party, to be precise.”

“Oh, and why’s that? No, wait, let me order our food and you tell me everything.”

She smiled tenderly at him, the annoyance vanishing quickly. “I love you, you know that, right?”

“I do.” He chuckled, standing up. “As you should.”

“Prick.”

“I love you too, my favourite drama queen.”

“Milk tea and the fudgiest chocolate muffin, please. Don’t forget the scrambled eggs!”

“Noted. I’ll be back in a second.”

Y/N stared at the street, trying not to let Yeonjun’s words worsen her confusion.

Working as a translator gave Y/N the advantage of flexible hours and working from home. What once felt like a benefit, now didn’t. She went about half a chapter before giving up. There was no use, her head just wouldn’t focus enough.

Opening the group chat with only her girl friends, she invited everyone for dinner. She needed some time away from Soobin, and needed some purely feminine company.

It was past eight when Felicia arrived. She was the last one, so they could finally declare that the night officially started – good wine, a huge charcuterie board, cheese and chocolate fondue… And…

Well, Soobin’s brownies.

Y/N made sure not to linger on that thought, not to let the memory of how she got them cloud her senses (again), because it went against the mood she had planned for the night.

And it would’ve worked if said boy could read her mind. Unfortunately, he couldn’t – for her phone vibrated and indicated a text message from him.

[21:12] binbin🐰: so u had breakfast with yeonjun…….

AND invited the girls over WITHOUT us

(gyu and i)

[21:12] y/n: yeah, i did. why?

[21:12] binbin🐰: why do u hate me? 🥺

(us*, gyu is also pouty)

[21:12] y/n: where does this come from????

r u unwell?????

[21:12] binbin🐰: u havent talked to me the whole day

cant i miss my best friend?

[21:12] y/n: ofc u can

but u r never clingy

so i got concerned

[21:12] binbin🐰: well, im clingy now

[21:13] y/n: oh

[21:13] binbin🐰: yeah

[21:13] y/n: id invite u but tonight’s strictly girls night

[21:13] binbin🐰: come over later

[21:13] y/n: cant

[21:13] binbin🐰: 😨

why??????

[21:13] y/n: idk when they’ll leave

[21:13] binbin🐰: idc

come anyway

She blocked her phone, feeling her stomach tightening.

“Well, that’s… Sweet, I guess?” Mimi murmured, staring at her.

“Were you reading everything?!”

“I couldn’t help but read.”

Y/N opened her mouth, torn between being offended or asking Mimi what ‘sweet’ actually meant. Obviously, seeing Soobin that night wasn’t a smart move.

“So, how’s the ‘Donghyuck’s Annihilation’ going?” Felicia questioned, bringing her back to reality.

“What kind of title is this?” She giggled.

“It’s more dramatic, which suits you.” Fel shrugged. “So…?”

“How’s ‘Soobin’s classes’ going, you mean.” Haena quipped.

“I’ll let you know Donghyuck and I sometimes talk to each other through DM’s, and I’ve been more comfortable around him, so it’s going pretty well.” Y/N cleared her throat, feigning indifference.

“Oh, that’s nice.” Felicia smiled. “Feeling comfortable around him is important.”

“Soobin thinks we should meet at a party, ‘cause the change of atmosphere might be good and might make Hyuck look at me differently.”

“Hmm… Makes sense.” Haena agreed. “But what about your shyness? Would you be ok with kissing him and even sleeping together?”

A quick flashback of what happened at Soobin’s kitchen made Y/N blush, but she played it cool. “Yeah, I think I’d be fine. Maybe I’d pass out from nervousness, but I wouldn’t hesitate.”

Haena stared at her for a second or two, sipping her wine. “Then I’m glad you decided not to listen to us and pursue your crazy plan with Soobin’s help.”

“Can we stop talking about this? Yeonjun also interrogated me today and I really wanted to have a night-off.” Y/N pouted. “Why don’t you girls talk about your love lives, for a change?”

“The biggest change here is you getting out of your shell, but ok.” Felicia pointed out, grinning.

“Ya’ll not ready for my girlfriend era.” She chuckled.

Matter of fact, Y/N wasn’t exactly ready for that herself.

Around midnight, she finally laid down, skincare routine done and warm bedsheets. Plugging her phone on the charger, she sighed and opened her chats. It was a new day, so she didn’t need to pretend not to think about Soobin and Donghyuck again.

[00:09] y/n: asleep?

It took her some minutes to get a reply.

[00:12] binbin🐰: im not talking to u

[00:12] y/n: why’s that?

[00:12] binbin🐰: u didnt come

[00:12] y/n: the girls left and i had to clean up the mess

[00:12] binbin🐰: u can come now then 😤

She pondered for a second, but the alcohol made her reckless – or she wanted to believe so.

[00:12] y/n: can i, sir?

how?

Soobin typed and erased a few times before replying.

[00:14] binbin🐰: ???

what the fuck do u mean

r we talking abt the same thing???

[00:14] y/n: probably not

[00:14] binbin🐰: im talking abt u coming downstairs

[00:14] y/n: im talking abt what happened the other night

Another pause.

[00:16] binbin🐰: y/n

[00:16] y/n: soobin

[00:16] binbin🐰: lets keep this convo PG

[00:16] y/n: i dont want to

[00:16] binbin🐰: why not?

[00:16] y/n: ‘cause im slightly tipsy and super frustrated and angry

u didnt let me suck u off and now im one step behind

what if hyuck wants me to suck him off?????

[00:16] binbin🐰: then u suck him off

[00:16] y/n: what if im not good at it?

[00:16] binbin🐰: bullshit

[00:16] y/n: how do u know

[00:17] binbin🐰: i just do

[00:17] y/n: how

[00:17] binbin🐰: u gonna have to trust me in this

[00:17] y/n: nope 😌

[00:17] binbin🐰: would i ever lie to u? no

so stop worrying and go to sleep

[00:17] y/n: im not worrying

im frustrated and angry

ill spend the whole night watching blowjob videos and taking tips

bc u didnt help me like u promised!!!!!

She was sure she crossed a line that wasn’t supposed to be crossed, but it was too late.

[00:18] binbin🐰: stop being a brat for once in ur life

i mean it

[00:18] y/n:  😌 nope 😌

The vibration caught her by surprise. ‘Binbin’ lighted up her screen like some kind of hypnosis.

“Don’t.” His voice cut the silence.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t watch porn, it’s not helpful at all.”

“It might be more helpful than you at the moment.”

He sucked in a breath the same way he did whenever Beomgyu got on his nerves. “How much did you drink? You’re not easily intoxicated, so stop with the attitude.”

“I drank enough to be bold and ask for it… Again.”

There was a tiny silence, then a sigh. “Tomorrow. When you’re fully sober.”

Tomorrow, it was.

When Y/N entered Soobin’s apartment the next night, she brought hot chocolate for them. An apology gift, if she was being honest, for bothering him with her needy rampage. Not that the ashamed feeling was enough to keep her dirty mind at bay.

Nonetheless, it was easier to pretend she was there to learn how to play Overwatch than to learn how to suck dick. Donghyuck wasn’t a League of Legends guy like Soobin, however, Y/N had no interest neither in one game nor the other – she only needed to know the basics so she could try to strike conversation and maybe actually join them in one of their gaming meetings.

Sitting at the chair beside his one, she listened to him explain about the history and purpose of the game. It was always endearing to witness how talkative he became whenever he talked about the things he liked, and so she couldn’t help but fondly let him go on with the monologue.

Some time later, they started playing, but Soobin was too close, his long fingers typing the controls with ease while his attention was glued to the screen. Y/N told herself she was only looking at his hand because it was necessary. She didn’t have any other thoughts on her mind but learning the commands. She didn’t care how good those slender fingers felt inside her.

She couldn’t possibly care less that they curled just right and reached her spot with as much ease as they typed the keyboard. She obviously didn’t mind the fact they weren’t inside her right now.

“Stop! You’re trying to distract me!” Y/N groaned.

“I’m literally playing for you.” He quipped. “How is this…”

“You keep moving in a quick pace, knowing I get distracted easily. I can’t focus!”

Soobin frowned, trying to understand her mood swing. “It’s not my fault we have to be fast!”

“Still.” She pouted, chin up.

In those days following their new agreement, Soobin learnt something about Y/n: she had quite a temper when horny – as if it offended her that she felt any type of emotion, something similar to the way she behaved whenever she was fighting back tears.

And her flushed cheeks could also mean anger, of course. It would make sense. However, her glossy eyes and dry mouth had nothing to do with anger.

How could he be so sure?

Because he felt as restless as her. The moment she showed up in a black satin pyjama set, he realised his mistake. Now he knew that she was pantie-less, and now he also knew what she looked like without any piece of clothing on.

And now he wanted to see her again.

“Why are you so antsy?”

“I’m not!” Her pout grew bigger and he couldn’t help but grin. “Why are you smiling?”

“You’re cute.” He chuckled. “Come, try it instead.” Putting his hands over hers, he guided the mouse through her. “Press this for shooting.” He indicated once again, moving his finger over hers. “Like this. Good.” His voice dropped an octave. “Focus, love.”

He felt the shivers on her skin, and desire shot through him too.

“H-How do I enter there?” Y/N gulped as he pushed some hair off her shoulder.

“Use the mouse.” But instead of moving with her, he let go, lightly tracing her arm from the wrist to her elbow. “Atta girl.”

Fuck.

Any resolve of focusing vanished after those two words. Y/N felt her stomach tightening, heart picking up a beat. “What now?”

The proximity was tempting, and Soobin found himself giving in.

“While gaming… Things can get freaky.” His voice was low and raspy, enticing. “And people can get creative, you know? Maybe cockwarming, just to spice things up. Or a blowjob…”

Was it supposed to make her mouth water like that?

“Would you ask me to?”

Soobin held the impulse of correcting her, of reminding her this wasn’t about him, but Donghyuck. However, since he was the teacher, he told himself it made sense. “Do you want me to?”

Her chest rose with a deep intake of breath, as she tried to find her own voice. “Yes.” His lips found the column of her neck, leaving love bites all over. Y/N moaned, tightening her hold on the mouse. “Bin, I can’t concentrate.”

“Shall we move it to the bed?”

She didn’t need to be told twice. Leaping from her chair, she found some comfort in the mattress. Soobin chuckled, closing the game and following her. Matching her eagerness, he kissed her in an urgent pace, trying to placate whatever hunger grew within him recently – whenever he had his hands on Y/N, to be more precise.

It didn’t take much for their bodies to intertwine. Hips against hips, they moved in synch, chasing some kind of relief. Touching her under the pyjama shirt, he scratched from her lower back to her waist, then rested on her boobs, cupping them.

His touches and the friction made her belly tug, her panting growing more erratic by each second. “Bin, Bin, wait. Wait.” She tried to stop, but her body had a life of its own. “I shouldn’t…”

“What?” Pinching a nipple, he relished on her breathy moan.

“Oh, please, don’t.” Her hands came to his shoulders, ready to push him off, but instead they just clawed against his t-shirt. “I’m supposed to be giving you a blowjob, not humping you like a needy teenage girl.” But it was so good. So, so good. “I can’t come now.”

“What if I want you to?”

Yes. “No, please.” Y/N groaned, the words escaping without control. “If I don’t have your dick in my mouth any time soon, I might honestly go berserk.”

“That bad?” He couldn’t help but chuckle, a small smirk gracing his face.

“That bad.” She agreed. “You don’t understand, I thought about it since…” Well, fuck, she was already in too deep, so she better make the best of it. “Ever since the kitchen episode.”

God, she made it hard for him to resist. “Really?”

“I even had wet dreams about it.” Y/N stole a peck. “Twice.” Another one. “So, you see, this is quite serious. I’ve been frustrated and horny… And now I’m so wet and bothered I might cry if I don’t get to suck you in less than two minutes!” She wasn’t lying, for her eyes turned glossy.

Donghyuck was going to be a fucking lucky bastard.

“Hey, no.” He held her cheek tenderly, pecking her lips too. “No need to cry, I’ll give it to you.”

“Now?”

“Now.” Soobin stole one last kiss. “On your knees for me, love.”

Y/N admitted she never loved such words as much as she did then.

Getting between his legs, she pushed his t-shirt up until his belly button. The outline of his underwear showed, and her mouth watered. Leaning down, she peppered feather kisses on the skin above it, feeling his abs hardening. It made a rush of power and satisfaction wash through her, elated for getting him that way. Tugging at the hem of his trousers, she pushed them down, bringing the underwear too – and she gulped at the sight.

Well…

Oh.

Well, God help her, for that man was handsome in every angle.

His dick sprung free, big, rosy, hard and veiny. And she didn’t waste any more time, welcoming him inside with a smooth, swift move.

Full on her mouth, heavy on her tongue, salty on her taste buds, Choi Soobin was perfect. Y/N wasn’t sure what made her wetter: finally sucking him off, or the way his head was bent backwards, throat exposed as his Adam’s apple bobbed with the moan he let out.

“Fuck, love, it’s so warm.” He rasped. “I’ll tug at your hair now, ok? So I can set a pace. Or do you want to do this alone?” He looked down and she shrugged, quite unsure of what to choose. “Let’s do it together, then. I want you to feel comfortable too.” Threading his fingers on her hair, Soobin pushed her head down a bit. “Open up a bit more, love, let me go deeper.” She obeyed. “Like that, yeah.” He closed his eyes for a second, relishing on the feeling. “Are you alright?” Y/N tried to answer, a muffled ‘mhm’ coming out instead of a ‘yes’. “Good. Do you think you can handle a bit of gagging? If I thrust and it hits your throat, will it be ok?”

He was so gentle with her, it was really sweet… But Y/N didn’t mind roughness. Replacing her lips with her hands, she swallowed a bit of drool. “We can try.”

“Tap my thighs if you feel any discomfort.”

“Don’t mind me, just let me make you cum.”

She lazily sucked his tip, jerking him off as she pondered the best way to take all of him. Relaxing her jaw, she let go with a ‘pop’ and took a deep breath before fully sucking him again. The grip on her hair tightened, forcing her head down with more strength than before. His dick slid easily, as if her mouth was made for him, welcoming his length.

“Fuck, love.” He groaned, borderline insane. “Fuck. Keep going.” Each time she bobbed up and down, she took a bit more of him until the gag came. Tears burned her orbs and her throat closed, making her cough loudly. “You good?”

“Good.” Y/N agreed. “Let me try again.”

“Are you sure?”

“Guide me.”

He moved forward, crowding over her and holding her jaw. “Breathe through your nose and hold it each time you sink. It helps.” He caressed her lower lip. “Here, try with my fingers.” She opened, feeling his thumb first, sucking on it slightly. Then, he took it off and gave her his index, so he could go further. His digit was slender, bony, but she felt the gag anyway. “Don’t breathe as you go down, love. Right, take it easy.” Y/N obeyed, holding her breath. “Like this, yes, perfect.” She reached for his dick again, mimicking what she was doing on his finger. “Fuck.” He let out an amused laugh, raspy and short. “Can I add one more?”

She shook her head, welcoming another one. It was honestly easier that way, but at each stroke of her wrist, she grew restless – she wanted to taste him again, wanted to hear his grunts, and see the way he looked like when he came. So, instead of waiting for him to tell her what to do next, Y/N pushed his hand away and focused on his cock. Soobin remained quiet, letting her do whatever she wanted. She gathered some saliva, spitting on his tip and smudging it with her thumb. He held back a groan, fluttering at the feeling of her caress.

“I wanna do it now.”

“Go on, then.” He barely finished speaking when she started sucking him again. Keeping in mind how and when to breathe, she was able to take him easier than before. Soobin’s eyes darkened, enamoured by the sight. “Like this, go slow. No need to rush.” She looked at him through her lashes, encouraged by his words. Drool pooled on her mouth, making her gag just a tiny bit when she got past half of his shaft. “You’re doing so good.” He praised. “So good for me, love.” It was enough to keep her going, a little more confident than before. He finally hit her throat and she gagged, but instead of stopping, Y/N bobbed her head up and down once again, trying the pace and the whole move. “Fuck, I might need you to suck me off every day now.” He chuckled, reaching for her hair again, not forcing her face, but keeping some kind of pressure there.

Y/N really did her best. Every time he hit her throat, she ignored the discomfort and the tears, because the pretty, quiet moans he let out were too divine for her to care about anything else. However, as his hips started moving on their own, the quicker they got, the harder it was to conceal her breathing… So, she had to stop. She decided to focus on the tip, sucking and licking at it, while her hand pumped his shaft up and down.

“Where?” His voice came out strained. “Where should I come, love?”

She frowned, pondering. Unbuttoning her shirt would take ages, so the most logical place was… her mouth. Well, she couldn’t deep throat yet, but she obviously could swallow. Besides, she knew boys liked stuff like that. Not bothering to answer, Y/N sucked him with renewed disposition.

It was the way she refused to step back, warm palm against his skin, delicious and wet lips on his tip… Soobin had been waiting for that since the kitchen episode. So, when his orgasm washed over him, he wasn’t sure what felt better: the sheer pleasure of finally cumming, or the whole experience. At the moment, it wasn’t his best friend between his legs ‘trying’ a blowjob so she could do it on her future boyfriend. Y/N was a pretty girl with a perfect mouth and an eagerness to please that would make any boy weak on the knees.

And when their eyes met, the lustful haze not as thick as before, Soobin couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so satisfied with just a blowjob.

“Sorry I couldn’t take it all.” She broke the silence, disappointed. “I wish I…”

“Don’t worry.” He cut her off, ready to say ‘We can try again next time’, but the words died before reaching his tongue. There wouldn’t be a next time. She was supposed to do it with Donghyuck, not him. However, it wouldn’t be the same. Donghyuck probably didn’t have a big dick like he did. It was such a petty thought, but it was better than acknowledging the pang of jealousy Soobin felt at the perspective of Y/N deep throating his friend. “You were perfect.”

The small smile that graced her lips made his heart clench. “Oh, you don’t have to…”

“Trust me. You never got a blowjob, so trust me.”

She chuckled. “Alright.”

And because he was still in a haze thanks to the pleasure, Soobin pulled her up by the hand. “C’mere, let me take care of you now.”

Y/N went to him like a moth to a flame, without resisting. Their mouths collided as she sat on his lap, melting on the kiss, burning with it. Before he could lay her down and finally get those pyjama’s pants off, someone knocked on the door.

“Yo, bro, what are you doing?” It was Beomgyu’s voice. “You’re marked as ‘away’ on the group chat, but… Oh. Ohhh.” He giggled. “Is Y/N in there?”

Y/N shook her head in fear, signalling a ‘No’. Beomgyu wouldn’t let her live if he knew he interrupted them… And she wasn’t in a good mental state to take the blow.

“No. I was just watching anime.” Soobin thanked God his voice sounded normal.

“Ah, alright. How about LoL?”

“Coming right in.”

“Ok!” They heard his steps vanishing towards his own room, and sighed.

“I better go, then.” Y/N tried to stand up.

“Wait, no. Why?”

“I don’t want to see Beomgyu now, and you gotta focus on your game.” She cleared her throat, forcing a smile. “C’mon, don’t be difficult.”

“Alright.” He sighed again. “Alright.”

Trying to avoid any embarrassment, she reached for the door, pondering what to say.

“Thank you, though. It was… Really nice.” Oh, how cringe!

“The pleasure was mine. Literally.” His eyes got smaller as he grinned.

“I’m glad.” She glanced at him one last time. “Night, Bin.”

“Night, love.”

Y/N’s breath caught, the nickname ringing in a different tune now. Almost bolting out of the room, she took the stairs instead of the lift, desperate to be alone.

She needed to get Soobin out of her system, and the slick mess on her pyjama’s pants had to be addressed by thoughts of tanned skin, adorable moles and a heart-shaped mouth… Although her mind kept recalling a roguish smile and dimples – which was annoying, since they belonged to…

Felicia and Y/N had left the Pilates’ class ready for their Friday brunch. She liked spending time with her friends, she recharged in their presence; however, this time she just wanted to be quiet. She had no idea of what to do with her thoughts, the flashes of last night occupying much of her head and making it so hard to focus on anything else.

“You’re not even listening.” Fel sighed.

“Of course I am!” Y/N retorted.

“So what was I saying?”

She gulped. “You were…” Luckily, her phone vibrated with a new message. Shaky hands, she ignored the tighten on her heart at the name on the screen.

[11:28] binbin🐰: party tomorrow

time to try our new strategy

Tomorrow.

Oh.

“What is it? You look… I don’t know, stunned?!” Felicia frowned.

“Soobin texted. A-apparently I’ll try to seduce Hyuck tomorrow.” She looked at her friend. “I might… I might kiss Donghyuck tomorrow, Fel.”

“And this is good, right?”

“Of course!” She smiled.

It was. Despite de unsettling feeling on her stomach.

Working went as smoothly as she could make it, now with two growing worries haunting her. Mimi noticed she was acting weird and called for help, which came by the form of take-out and Choi Yeonjun. There was nothing her darling dearest couldn’t mend, heal or sort out.

They were in the middle of an ‘Attack on Titans’ episode when she broke the news.

“I’ll try my next step with Hyuck tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Yeonjun turned to her, interested.

“Yeah.”

Something in her expression made his heart clench. “You nervous, darling?” He asked softly.

Eren’s screams while fighting against titans were a great demonstration of how Y/N felt the whole day. She was confused, frustrated and anxious.

“Nervous, yeah.”

“Why?”

“Got a lot on my mind.” Y/N took a deep sigh, cheeks flushing. “With Soobin things are easy. I don’t feel anxious, nor insecure. On the contrary! I feel… Seen. Cared for. Special. It makes sense, right? He’s my best friend.” She shook her head, as if trying to sort her thoughts. “I-I know what you’re thinking: friends don’t… Friends don’t do what we do. But he is just helping me, because I am desperate. I still like Donghyuck. I really do.”

“I know, darling, you don’t have to explain anything.” Yeonjun took her hand, giving it a tender squeeze. “I believe you, and I’m always on your side.”

The thing was… She was starting to doubt herself.

part two out now!

[love-belle]

my sunshine !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which they're the 'it' couple and everyone's obsessed with them, rightfully so.

or

for when you find your forever kinda person. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // lando norris x fem!reader

warnings - language

author's note - finally it's here!!! i really hope u like it!!! thank you so much for reading, i love you <3

edit - changed it bc the person who requested it doesn't speak hindi x

≡;- ꒰ °twitter ꒱

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, lilymhe and 799,416 others

yourusername 💐

tagged landonorris

7,728 comments

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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

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landonorris something about taylor swift and saving me a seat at every table

tagged yourusername

8,528 comments

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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

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yourusername chellam ( sweetheart )

tagged landonorris

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landonorris 4ever and ever my girl. i love you.

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yourusername a series of unfortunate events

tagged landonorris danielricciardo

7,928 comments

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-> landonorris at least you feel bad, y/n just laughed for 10 mins and then made fun of me 💔💔💔

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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, carmenmmundt and 886,688 others

landonorris sadly only 3 out of 26281927 made it to the gram 💔

tagged yourusername

8,931 comments

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*liked by yourusername and lilymhe*

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*liked by landonorris*

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-> landonorris duly noted

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[tinydeskwriter]

LOVE HOLD| ⟮private⟯

lando norris x wolff!reader | f1 grid x wolff!reader (mostly)platonic

A/n: just a little peak at y/n private ig account...

«previous part | next part»

liked by lilymhe, landonorris, susie_wolff and 43 others

noty/n.wolff it all started when my mom met my dad, they fell in love, and they had me! hi, i'm ryan... dude, those are my parents, I came from them, talk about winner genes...

view all 18 comments

alex_albon you did not inherit they height though...

↳noty/n.wolff your opinion is irrelevant...

↳charlesleclerc midget😊

↳noty/n.wolff i going over there to cry on my many grand slam trophies from my many wins, comforted in the fact that I'm still number one in the world, not that you guys know what this feel like...

↳charlesleclerc uncalled for...

↳noty/n.wolff don't come for my height and I won't come for your lack of wins🙂

↳landonorris ankle biter

↳noty/n.wolff i am going to ignore you

Aug 12th 2022

liked by lilymhe, landonorris, francisca.cgomes and 65 others

(tagged: francisca.cgomes; charlottesiine; elizaabrams; cassandra.blanchard; benshelton)

noty/n.wolff men ain't shit, like the goddess cher once siad, man are like dessert, you don't need them... stick to your girls (+benny)

btw pierregasly, thank u for introducing me to kika, i think i am keeping her😘

view all 23 comments

francisca.cgomes you can keep me😍

↳pierre gasly wait a minute...

↳noty/n.wolff💍alexa play boyfriend by dove cameron

Oct 30th 2022

liked by lilymhe, francisca.cgomes, landonorris, susie_wolff and 52 others

noty/n.wolff go shawty, it's your birthday, we gon' party like it's your birthday... congrats landito! you manage to survive for 23 years, and i am so proud of you! there were a few close calls(at least a few that i witnessed) but you made it! i hope you feel blessed and special, not everyone gets a appreciation post from yours truly🤍

jokes aside...happy birthday lan, i wish you a world of happiness, because you deserve it, thank u for making my life happier by being in it 🤍 we have been in each others lives for nearly fifteen years now, here to more fifteen, i hope you know, through thick and thin, i will always be by your side 🤍😘

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lilymhe I love the third photo, who took it??

↳francisca.cgomes I thought the same when I saw the fourth photo

↳noty/n.wolff 😘

alex_albon just friends, she says

↳georgerussell63 the best of friends, she says

↳alex_albon we are being ignored

↳georgerussell63 I noticed

landonorris❤️❤️❤️

↳noty/n.wolff 🤍🤍🤍

Nov 13th 2022

liked by carlossainz55, francisca.cgomes, landonorris, susie_wolff and 49 others

noty/n.wolff last trip of the year before going home for christmas, touring with local carlossainz55, Madrid may have become one of my favorite cities in the world, thank you the Sainz family for welcoming me and for the 5⭐hospitality, congrats on the newlyweds, beautiful wedding a wish you guys a long and happy life together🤍

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carlossainz55 come back whenever you want

Dec 9th 2022

liked by lilymhe, landonorris, susie_wolff and 43 others

noty/n.wolff Merry Christmas folks🤍

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Dec 25th 2022

noty/n.wolff half a century + 1 looks good on you🤍 the man who always encouraged me to follow my dreams and do twice as much to make them come true, who never let me give up, and who, even though he couldn't physically be present, never lost any of my matches. #1 dad in the world, best team principal in F1, a example to be followed, I honestly could not wish for a better father.

love u daddy. happy birthday🤍

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susie_wolff you made him emotional

elizaabrams girl sometimes I forget that your dad is the king of dilfs...

(liked by lilymhe, susie_wolff and francisca.cgomes)

noty/n.wolff 👀

Jan 12th 2023

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taglist:@myescapefromthislife | @kapsylia | @biitch-with-wifi |@vicurious28 | @minkyungseokie | @asfaraslifegets

[harringtonswriting]

the one where chaos comes out to play | s.h.

summary: steve hates thursdays, and thursdays hate steve. today is no exception, except that the green goblin has decided to try and hurt him in a brand new way, and steve isn't sure he can keep going if the worst comes to pass (modern!au; spidey!steve universe) pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader word count: 7.4k warning(s): language; some violence (fight scenes); mentions of injuries/blood notes: HI HELLO ITS SPIDEY!STEVE TIME !!!! thank u all for being so patient; i know this is much longer than normal but i was SO excited for it and i loved the idea!! thank u to the two anons who requested this; i kind of combined the two requests into one, i hope that's okay! also it's the first real introduction for a villain, and there's plenty more to come... i hope you enjoy!!

...

Steve thought he’d been careful. Always did his best to be as careful and as conspicuous as he can where the people he loves are concerned so that nothing about his activities as Spider-Man could be traced back to them. He doesn’t swing Robin to work in costume when she’s running late; he only rescues Ozzy from the roof of Eddie’s building when absolutely necessary (which probably happens more often than it should, but the fuzzball loves it when Steve makes a web-sling to carry him around in); and he does everything possible to keep the dangers of his life as Spider-Man away from you. In public, at least.

But in private? He’s at your place all the time. Probably too often, considering how much he pays in rent for his place across the hall from you, but as long as he gets to spend time with you he won’t complain (to you, but Robin isn’t quite so lucky considering she lives with him). Ever since he’d first seen you the day he moved into his crappy little apartment in this too old building, when you peeked out at him carrying too many boxes at once, he’d decided he needed to get to know you (which he did, with all the ups and downs that came with it). Now you’re one of his best friends, one of the few people who know he’s Spider-Man, someone he cherishes totally and completely (though he’ll deny it because having you in his life as a friend is enough, at least for now), and also someone he’d never, ever risk getting hurt.

But Steve must have slipped up at some point, and the universe really decided to make him pay for it. Steve and you.

It’s a Thursday. Nothing good ever happens on a Thursday, not for Steve; he’s pretty sure he was brought into this world on a Thursday, and it always seems like the universe is trying to take him out on the same day. It’s usually the day that he’s stuck running around after crazed supervillains who want to destroy half the city because it’s Thursday and that’s just what they wanna do on Thursdays for shits and giggles. Like today, with the Green Goblin playing explosion tag with him and yelling out nonsense.

Okay, well, it was actually something like, “Heroism is a fool’s errand!” and, “Chaos will destroy everything you love!” But honestly, this is the third time this month that the Green Goblin has pulled something like this and Steve is very quickly running out of patience. This time, though, it’s harder than normal for Steve to try and keep the villain contained in a single area of the city. It almost feels as if Goblin is toying with him, more so than usual, and is trying to lead Steve into something.

Steve’s wary of the psychotically jolly green man on a good day; despite not being as superpowered as some of the other bad guys Steve sees on the regular, Goblin learns and observes and always manages to have some kind of ace up his sleeve. And today, the taunts he gets as he tries to bring the villain down are just that much more smug than usual; Goblin also has some new gadgets, which includes a pumpkin bomb that turns into a small flying bladed monstrosity that hurts like a bitch when they make contact with him. This suit is already torn up and Steve is going to have a hell of a time repairing it, if it even can be repaired at this point. And this one is new, too… Thursdays really suck.

So here Steve is, using his webs to grab a large chunk of the side of a building and fling it away from a group of terrified bystanders on the sidewalk and up onto the roof of a nearby building—well, onto the rooftop garden that’s probably going to need to be re-landscaped, but it had entirely too many topiaries for Steve’s taste so he figures he’s doing them a favour. They’ll save a ton on having to get them removed, and maybe now they can put in a rooftop pool with the new hole they’ll have.

One of these days he’s gonna get sued for property damage, but today is (hopefully) not that day, so he swings back towards the Green Goblin, who’s currently hovering near a rooftop down the block. Steve makes sure that the bystanders are out of harm’s way for now (though he’s sure he’s going to read all about how he’s the one who put them in danger in tomorrow’s edition of the Daily Bugle) before he sends out some webs with a thwip! to swing himself towards the roof that Goblin is currently hovering over. Only this time, unlike every other time Steve has gotten close enough to land a clean hit, the green menace doesn’t try to leave his position. It’s more than a little odd, but Steve hopes that maybe it means his Thursday is taking a turn for the better.

It’s not.

As Steve swings closer, Goblin lets out a loud, ear-splitting cackle behind the creepy mask that he somehow thinks is a good fashion choice as he swoops down towards the roof. Steve throws out another line of webbing, swinging himself up to get a clearer view of what’s going on. The Green Goblin is grabbing something—or someone, Steve realizes, who’d been on that rooftop.

He feels it at the base of his skull, tingling and quivering both down through his spine and up through his head. Something is way off, worse than he’s felt in a long time, and his Spidey-Sense is warning him that something really bad is about to happen really quickly. The quip he’d been holding onto, something really great about how if Green Goblin was having problems with his glider, they make pills for that now, dies in his throat. Steve lands on the side of an adjacent building, watching Goblin fly up holding the person from the roof.

It’s you.

Steve feels as if the wind has been knocked out of him, seeing the Green Goblin holding you up by the throat to dangle you over the edge of his glider. All sound around him immediately stops, save for the frantic sound of his own heart hammering and thumping against his ribcage, aiming to shatter it. That would probably hurt less, he thinks, than seeing how terrified you look right now. Your wrists are bound together in front of you in a way Steve can’t imagine is very comfortable, and he has to take some very deep breaths through his nose to stop himself from screaming your name.

Why are you here? Why does Goblin have you? How long has he had you? A million and one questions are running through Steve’s head, faster than usual, almost too fast to keep up with. You’re in your work clothes, though they’re beyond rumpled and a little torn now; did Goblin grab you at work? On your home from work? From the apartment building? God, Steve really hopes Goblin doesn’t know where you live; if he’s taken away the safety of your home from you, Steve doesn’t know what he can do to fix that.

How did anyone link you back to Steve? He’s been careful, he thought he’d been so careful to keep you out of his life. Does the Goblin know who Steve really is? Oh god, what does that mean for you? For Robin or Eddie, or Dustin or Max or Nancy, or anyone else who’s connected to Steve Harrington? Shit, he’s gotta get this figured out fast.

He’s never been more thankful than he is now that his mask covers his entire face, because he’s really not sure he could hide the emotions he’s sure are twisting and contorting his features. What started out as cold fear trickling down his back and into his stomach has partially turned to molten hot anger is thrumming through his chest; it makes for an odd combination of sensations while his mind is trying to put together any kind of plan to get you away from here and somewhere, anywhere, that’s safe.

“Let her go, Goblin!” Steve is trying to keep his tone as even as he can, hoping that the desperation he’s feeling isn’t obvious enough in his voice that the Green Goblin will pick up on it. He moves one hand up, getting ready to swing closer when the Goblin rises a bit higher in the air on his glider and holds out the hand not currently wrapped around your neck.

“Ah, ah, ah, Spider-Man! Come any closer and my hand may just slip,” the Goblin taunts, his hand loosening slightly on your neck as he pretends to almost drop you. Or maybe he’s not pretending; that guy’s mind is a bag full of barn cats on a good day, and today is not a very good day at all. You can’t help the noise you make, a strangled sort of shriek, as your fingers scramble to find purchase and hold onto the wrist of the hand that’s holding you up. It’s not very easy with your wrists bound, Steve imagines, but you do your best. He sees the kick you send in Goblin’s direction, which is more than likely intended to harm rather than help your balance, and there’s a tiny prick of fondness to Steve’s heart. That’s his girl. Well, okay, not his, per se, but close enough.

“Take it easy, Gobbie, I’m gonna stay right here.” For now. That stays unspoken, but Steve is trying to look for any opportunity to get you out of there. “You know, there are much better ways to make friends than this if you’re feeling lonely, y’know, that don’t reek of desperation and eau de jolly green giant.”

“I’ve been watching you, Spider-Man,” the Green Goblin says, hovering a little higher and putting his free hand behind his back as he ignores Steve’s jab at him. Which is a pity, really, because Steve was hoping it might start something and Steve could make him mad enough to put you back down on the roof and out of harm’s way. “And I’ve noticed that you’ve come to her aid more than a few times.”

Shit. Okay. That’s not what Steve was expecting. The Green Goblin has been spying on him, which is a weird enough concept, but he’s been paying close enough attention to pick you out of crowds of people that Steve has saved. He thought he’d been more careful than that; but when he thinks back on it, he realizes that there’ve been at least two incidents this month where you’d been caught up in something he’s taken care of as Spider-Man, and definitely once or twice that you’ve covered for him as Steve so he could go save the day. And Goblin had been watching, had been able to see you and connect you to Spider-Man. That has Steve’s stomach twisting, and he can’t help fidgeting as he tries to think up an excuse fast enough.

“It’s my job to save people, Gobbie. You know, you put them in danger and I rescue them, usually looking dashing in the process,” Steve fires back, gesticulating with one hand. He’s trying to be as nonchalant as he can, and he really hopes it’s working. He really needs to break that mask Green Goblin is wearing, and any other spares he’s got, because being unable to read his facial expressions would be very helpful in situations like this. Plus, it’s absolutely the stuff of nightmares and Steve could save a lot of people a lot of money on therapy bills if he smashed it to pieces. Maybe then he’d get a good piece of news printed about him. “Maybe she just hangs out in bad parts of the city. Or maybe bad guys think she’s good looking. You and I both know Kingpin’s henchmen always go for pretty people; they aren’t on the deep end of the gene pool.”

“I told you that I don’t know Spider-Man!” you yell out as best you can, though your voice sounds more than a little strained to Steve. He’s gotta make a move and he’s gotta do it sooner rather than later because he needs to get you as far away from here as possible.

“Hmm… so you don’t care what happens to her, then?” Goblin asks, and he loosens his grip once more. Steve reaches forward, unable to help himself as he reacts on instinct. You shriek again, kicking out and catching the Green Goblin on his side. He growls at you, flying up a little higher before turning back to Steve. “Then it’s time to choose, Spider-Boy!” Goblin says, cackling loudly. “Will you save her?” His hand tightens around your throat, and the pained noise you make has Steve’s jaw clenching. “Or will you save them?”

Goblin’s free hand, which Steve had not been looking at as closely as he should have been while you’re in danger, comes out from behind his back holding three pumpkin bombs. He waves that hand towards what Steve sees is a group of civilians, standing down below and watching this interaction like it’s some kind of sport to them.

His stomach twists and his chest tightens as his Spidey-Sense goes absolutely haywire. Shit. Shit. How is he supposed to choose between the people down there and you? Can he save everyone? He has to save everyone, he’s Spider-Man.

He’s not given time to make an actual choice, however, because Green Goblin is throwing the pumpkin bombs and then the hand he has around your throat disappears. You start to fall down towards the street below and Steve realizes that he’s going to have to move faster than he’s ever had to before because he absolutely can’t lose you. Not like this, not ever.

He lunges forward in your direction, pushing himself off the wall to give himself as much momentum as he can. While he’s soaring through the air, trying to position himself to be able to catch you, he launches some webs with his right hand up towards the three flying pumpkin bombs. He’s trying to web them together, hopefully turning them into one bigger webby blob ball to better keep track of them—and to make sure they get back to the place they came from.

He manages to catch the first two and lump them together as the blinking green lights on the front of the bombs start speeding up. When they stop blinking completely, that’s when they blow up; Steve knows that from unfortunate personal experience. His eyebrows haven’t been the same since that last time. He shoots another web to grab the third, bringing them all together as he manages to catch up to where you’re currently falling.

Steve tries to be as gentle as he can as he uses his free hand to grab you around your waist, but he’s pretty sure there’ll be bruises there tomorrow. He’ll feel bad about that once the two of you get out of this, because right now your safety is his priority and he needs to make sure you get out of this. He slips your arms around his neck, turning your bodies as best he can so that he’s below you and looking up at the twistedly jolly masked face of the Goblin.

Now’s his chance. Steve swings the ball in the direction of where the Goblin is flying confidently above the two of you, as hard and as fast as he can before releasing the web strand. As soon as he’s done that, as quickly as he can, Steve shoots another web up to tether the two of you to a balcony on the side of the building. He feels your arms tighten around his neck as the web helps slow your fall, and he feels a small wave of relief settle over his shoulders as the two of you hit the ground.

He’s about to open his mouth and say something when there’s a very loud BOOM! from up above, followed by a shriek. Yeah, that had to hurt. Which Steve really hoped it did. But if it didn’t… Well, Steve was going to make sure Goblin knew what it felt like to hurt. And he was going to do it now, before the jolly green bastard had a chance to run away.

He removes your arms from their spot around his neck and makes sure that you’re steady on your feet before he rips the rope binding your wrists. He makes sure to keep his touch gentle as he takes hold of your shoulders, looking at you through his mask.

“Get somewhere safe!” he urges you. You open your mouth, looking as if you want to say something, but he shakes his head. “Now!” His tone leaves zero room for argument, and while he regrets seeing the way it causes your forehead to furrow and your posture to shrink, he will not let you get hurt again.

You nod, and then you’re turning to find somewhere to take cover until this is over. Steve watches you go before he turns to look up towards the roof of the building. He can see Goblin, looking much worse for wear, trying to ride a rapidly smoking and sparking glider. Definitely not having fun, and Steve is not going to let this guy get away.

Steve shoots two webs, one from each hand, at two balconies on the top floor of the building. He walks backwards as quickly as he can to pull the webs taut. Then he lets go of each simultaneously as he jumps up, letting them slingshot him up as fast as possible so that he can launch himself directly at the flying green menace. He manages to land a kick to Goblin’s stomach, knocking him off his glider. The two of them crash down onto the roof of the building and Steve takes advantage of the element of surprise he gains to make sure he lands on top of the villain to pin him down and start throwing punches wherever they’ll land.

Steve chooses to let the rage he felt earlier bubble back up to the surface as his fists start cracking against Goblin’s helmet, his shoulders, his chest… anything that he can reach, he hits. Steve thinks about the terrified look on your face, about the noises you made with the Green Goblin’s hand around your throat, about what would have happened if he hadn’t caught you in time… He keeps punching until his arm aches and he’s sure his knuckles have split and he can see the blood splattered across the rooftop underneath them. Goblin’s helmet has cracked and split, small chunks of it littering the rooftop beneath his head. There’s a chunk missing now, and Steve can’t find it in himself to be anything other than overwhelmingly furious. Both at Goblin and at himself.

Steve pauses, just for a second, when he sees something glinting where the chunk of the mask is missing. He looks closer, and when he does, he catches sight of one pale blue eye staring back up at him before smoke starts to cloud his vision.

Shit. Green Goblin let off a smoke bomb. Steve is taken by surprise, and starts to cough as he feels smoke enter his lungs. He tries to clear the smoke away with his hands, but it’s coming fast and thick from below him and it’s not letting up. He shifts, closing his eyes, and that’s when he feels an elbow catch him in the cheek before he’s knocked off of the Green Goblin. He makes contact with the concrete of the roof and damn, that hurts. He groans, still coughing, but as he opens his eyes he notices the smoke start to dissipate. He gets up, trying to wave it away, and as he does so he sees that Goblin has gotten back on his glider and is currently flying away.

Damn it. Steve falls back onto his butt on the rooftop, breathing a little easier now that the smoke is dissipating, though he’s still frustrated that Goblin got away. Thursdays really are the worst.

He doesn’t stay down long, though, because he can hear the sound of sirens getting closer and he really does not want to stick around to have to deal with any cops today. He doesn’t have the most patience for them on a good day, and since today is not a good day, he’s going to avoid that mess as best he can.

As the sirens get louder, Steve scrambles over to the side of the roof to peer down. He catches sight of the police cars coming in fast, and sees the crowd down on the streets has started to get bigger now that the Green Goblin has taken off to lick his wounds. And among the crowd, he manages to pick you out. Relief washes over him like he’s taken a drink of something warm on a very cold day (which he absolutely wants to do later, hot chocolate is calling his name). It eases the knots in his chest, especially as he sees you walking out of the area and in the direction of your shared apartment building.

You’re safe. You stayed behind instead of leaving, but you’re okay and you’re heading in the direction of home. And he’s gonna meet you there to make sure you’re okay—or get you the help you need if you’re not. Which he knows he’ll have Robin’s backup on too (though she probably won’t be too happy if she sees he’s bruised and bloody, too).

He moves back from the edge of the roof, moving to the other side to jump a few buildings over as discreetly as he can in red and blue spandex. He knows he’s got an old backpack with some spare clothes in it around here somewhere that he’s going to change into; after what just happened, with Green Goblin linking you to Spider-Man, he doesn’t want to take any risks that might lead someone back to where you both live. Not after today, after being slapped in the face with the reality of how dangerous his life is.

Aha, there it is! Steve finds one of his backpacks webbed behind some shrubbery, and he’s quick to grab it and start going through the contents. God, is he ever thankful for his own forgetfulness right now. He’s got to have an embarrassingly high number of backpacks, duffle bags, gym bags, and the like hiding all over the city at this point, and he’s glad he remembered this one. It’s got a full outfit in it, thankfully, as well as an old set of keys he thought he’d lost; it’s the one with the ‘Let’s go, Lesbians!’ keychain Robin had given him, which he hadn’t told her was missing so this works in his favour.

He jumps down off the roof, bag in hand, and ducks into a secluded alleyway to change out of his suit as quickly and inconspicuously as he can (though he does end up hopping around quite a bit trying to get his torn up suit off and his jeans on). He packs his suit into the backpack before he’s shrugging it onto his shoulders and dipping out of the alley to make his way home.

He gets there pretty quickly, though you’re nowhere in sight as he bounds up the steps to the building and uses his keys to let himself in. Steve moves through the lobby, groaning as he sees that unfortunately, the elevators are still out of service. He hasn’t had time to completely take stock of all his injuries yet, but he knows from his walk to the building that his right leg is not gonna like having to climb five flights of stairs. But you’re upstairs, and Robin probably is too, and he needs to see you and make sure you’re alright. So he takes a deep breath and starts to climb the stairs.

By the time he makes it up to the floor your apartments are on, he’s just a little out of breath and his right thigh absolutely hates him. But he makes it, and that’s what matters, so Steve makes his way to where your door and his door sit across the hall from each other. He’s not exactly sure if you would have gone to your own apartment first, so he makes his way to your door and presses his ear against it. He really hopes none of the neighbours decide to leave their apartments or look out into the hall because this will look really weird. Not the weirdest thing Steve’s done since he moved in here, but still.

He doesn’t hear anything on the other side of the door. He waits for a few more minutes, just to be sure, before he moves away from your door and heads to his. Now he can hear voices, low and muted behind the surprisingly sturdy wood of the door, as he fishes his keys back out of his pocket and uses them to unlock the door. He pushes it open, stumbling slightly over the lip in the doorway as he comes inside.

As Steve closes the door behind him and toes his own shoes off, he catches sight of Robin’s boots and your shoes sitting haphazardly on the mat by the door. The relief that washes over him is immediate, knowing you made it home and you’re here with Robin, who will absolutely make sure that you’re okay. The fact that your shoes are still here means that you’re not hurt enough to need to go to the hospital, which eases the knots in his stomach just a bit. He absolutely doesn’t know what he’d do if he was the reason you ended up in a hospital.

He drops his bag by the door and hangs up his keys on their hook before he makes his way down the small front hall and into the living room. As he rounds the corner and the living room comes into sight, he sees Robin perched on the coffee table, directly in front of where he sees you sitting on their armchair. Both of you are looking in his direction, and he tries to offer up a smile as he walks fully into the room and raises one hand in a wave.

“Steven Augustus Harrington!” Robin yells, getting up off the coffee table (barely managing to avoid knocking over the Lego flowers that Will had given them as a housewarming gift) to stomp over to him. The effect is slightly undermined by the giant fuzzy bumblebee slippers she’s wearing, and Steve sighs as fond exasperation for his best friend and roommate wins over any annoyance he feels. You stay seated, albeit perched on the edge of the chair, but Steve can see the way your shoulders go from being up near your ears to slumping down to where they normally rest that you’re relieved to see him, too.

“That’s not my name,” he tells her, but she disregards it with a wave of her hand. Her nose is scrunched and her eyebrows are furrowed as she starts looking him over.

“What the fuck, Steve? Are you okay?” she asks, before she starts going off on him about personal safety and not to rush into danger like that—he’s not exactly paying as close attention as he probably should be. He’s assuming she either found out what happened from you or online—he knows she’s got alerts set up for any news stories or social media posts about Spider-Man (which he knows because every time that stupid #SpideyFails account posts she’s gotta share it with all of their friends). But Steve doesn’t really want to talk about himself or how badly that fight with the Green Goblin went right now; he’d much rather make sure you’re okay, find out what happened and just… he wants to talk to you. He needs to talk to you. To make sure you’re okay; you’re quiet, too quiet, and the more time goes by the more worried he’s getting.

“Robin, I’m fine,” he assures her, though the little line between her eyebrows only gets deeper as she stares at him. Steve rolls his eyes and nods his head in the direction of her bedroom door. She tilts her head to the side, and Steve gestures a little more forcefully, hoping she’ll take the hint that he wants some privacy with you. Robin raises an eyebrow, and Steve nods again, this time in your direction

He sees realization spread across Robin’s face, and she turns to look at you. You’d been staring at them, Steve realizes, and you look away when they both meet your gaze. Robin shakes her head slightly, walking in your direction. She gently places a hand on your shoulder and rubs it before she grabs the first aid kit Steve hadn’t realized was on the coffee table, throwing it at Steve. He barely manages to catch it, fumbling it a bit before he’s sure he won’t drop it.

“Use your tingle next time, dingus!” she says, shuffling off in her fuzzy bumblebee slippers. She disappears into her room, closing the door behind her with a very audible click of her lock. Which leaves Steve alone in the living room with you.

He makes his way over to where Robin was sitting earlier, plunking himself down on the edge of the coffee table. His right leg absolutely does not like that, but it��ll heal soon enough. He’s close enough that his knees brush against yours, and despite the worry weighing his shoulders down, he feels his cheeks get warm at how close he is to you. Your eyes meet his, and he tries to smile at you.

“Hey,” he says, fingers tapping against the first aid box he’s keeping in his lap. You don’t smile back, but you do take a deep breath.

“Hey,” you greet back, and to Steve’s ears your voice sounds more than a little strained, and a bit too raspy for his liking. That’s when he starts to look you over more closely, taking stock of your injuries.

His heart falls because you’re hurt worse than he thought. Sure, he was expecting some cuts and bruises, but he didn’t know you were this hurt. There’s harsh bruising that’s starting to appear on your neck–that’s where Goblin was holding you. Where his hands were wrapped around your neck, holding you in the air before he dropped you. When Steve closes his eyes, he can still hear your screams, can still see how you look plummeting through the air while he tries to reach you. He swallows the saliva starting to gather in his mouth because that image is going to be one that sticks with him whether he wants it to or not.

There are some other cuts and bruises he can see as well, on your face and on your hands, and he’s pretty sure your work clothes probably won’t be workplace acceptable anymore. He makes a mental note to take you to buy new ones as soon as he gets his next pay, even though you’ll try to refuse them and tell him it’s not his fault your clothes are ruined.

Except it is. In this case, it is Steve’s fault. His being Spider-Man has put you in danger and he’ll do everything he can to make up for it. And he’s going to start now, by helping clean you up. He opens the first aid kit in his hands, pulling out some disinfectant and some gauze and bandages. “Can I…?” he asks. He looks between them and you, and you nod your head so he starts to get to work.

He cleans the cuts on your face first, wiping the blood off your cheeks and your chin before he starts disinfecting the small cuts there. Your nose scrunches up in pain, and he apologizes quietly for any pain he’s causing you. His heart is beating erratically against his ribcage and his hands tremble slightly as he works, but he does his best to help you.

The two of you sit in silence for a moment before he has to ask, “Why did you stay? I told you to get somewhere safe.” Because the thought of you being in any more danger than you’d originally been in isn’t a good one; if anything had happened to you afterwards, if Steve had been paying attention and not gotten hit in the face with a smoke bomb and the fight had spilled out off the rooftop again and put you in harm’s way again… he doesn’t want to think about it. His brain, though, still hates him and makes him imagine it anyway. He presses a bandaid on your cheek before he starts cleaning the bruise on your neck.

“I needed to make sure you were okay.” You scoot closer to Steve, close enough that he can count the eyelashes on your lower lash line. He can smell the dirt and the blood on you, mixing with the faint scent of your shampoo and body wash. But your words make his gut twist.

“No you didn’t!” His words come out a little louder and a little more forceful than he means, but he’s starting to feel frustration thrum through his body, warming him in a way that has his chest start to burn. Hearing those words come out of you any other time would probably have had the opposite effect on him; you needed to make sure he’s okay? Caring about him like that? It’s probably friendly, but it’d have Steve smiling the rest of the day. Right now, though, he’s not happy to hear you say that “You needed to get out of there. Goblin is dangerous, you can’t be around him!”

Steve drops the medical supplies back into the first aid kit on his lap, reaching his hands up to tangle in his hair instead. It’s knotty; that happens sometimes, when he shoves it under the mask without brushing it or after he gets it wet, and he winces as his fingers encounter a particularly bad tangle. You huff, crossing your arms over your chest as you lean back in the armchair.

“You have no right to lecture me when I’ve thought I was gonna lose you more times than I can count!” Your voice is rising in pitch, but Steve stays firm where he is. “How many times have I had to see, on the news or on Twitter, that you were getting thrown around by Doc Ock? Or blown up by Green Goblin? And I’m not even going to talk about the giant lizard you chased through the sewers last week!” Yeah, the lizard guy was a relatively new bad guy that no one had believed Steve about until he managed to get the creature to come up onto the street. This one was probably gonna be smelly. “And then you show up at my window, bleeding and half-dead, and I’m supposed to clean you up and be okay with that?”

One of your hands comes to push against his chest, a line appearing between your eyebrows as you frown at him. He feels the warmth spread further as he gets more frustrated because you’re not getting that this is what Steve does, this is what it means to be Spider-Man. He needs to protect people from being blown up or turned into lizards. Would you want to be a lizard? He doesn’t think so. You’d probably be a pretty lizard, potentially, but he’s not sure he wants to see that.

“Yes, because I can take it! I am the one who got bit by that stupid spider, not you!” Which is the truth; Steve knows he can take a beating and keep on going; it’s one of the few good things that came out of that visit to the CreelCorp plant. Yeah, maybe he lets himself go a bit too far sometimes, but it’s to protect the people of the city, and the people he loves. It’s to protect you, and if he loses a little (or a lot of) blood and has a broken bone or four, then it’s worth it. It’ll always be worth it to him. But apparently not to you, because you throw your hands up in the air.

“So? Why does that matter right now?”

“Because I almost lost you!” The flood gates open, and words come pouring out of Steve’s mouth before he can think to stop himself. “I could have lost you, and when I saw Goblin with you I thought I was going to lose you and I could never live with myself if that happened. If I lose you then there’s no point! The mask, the suit, everything! I won't keep going without you. The world can live without Spider-Man but I could never live without you!”

This is not how Steve wanted to do this. Hell, he wasn’t sure if he was ever going to tell you how he really felt about you because the thought of you not feeling the same and pulling away from him if he confessed? Not a good one. He never wanted to lose you in any capacity, but after having this happen he can’t keep it inside anymore. Really, you deserved better; you deserve someone who can keep you safe, whose entire existence doesn’t put you in danger. You deserve someone who can give you all the time and attention you could ever want, and probably wouldn’t run the risk of getting blown up or stabbed or missing your birthday because of a lizard who wants to give the city a cold-blooded makeover (which is, unfortunately, a very real possibility these days).

But god, does Steve love you. His chest aches with how much he loves you, how much he wants to hold you close and keep you safe. How much he hates himself for letting this happen to you, for letting you get hurt and letting himself be stupid enough to not realize what the Green Goblin had been doing. You were always there for him, letting him crawl through your bedroom window and ruin your rugs as you patch him up; letting him stay over at yours so he doesn’t worry Robin more than he already does. You take care of him, and you see him as both Steve and Spider-Man without treating him any differently. You’re witty and funny and kind, and you don’t treat him any differently knowing who he is and what he can do. And he’d never, ever want to live without you. He couldn’t do it, because he’s absolutely sure his heart only exists to beat for you, to tattoo your name across his ribcage. And he’d never want things to be any different.

He’s pulled out of his thoughts, though, by something tugging him forward before his lips are meeting something soft and warm. It takes his brain a second to catch up with his body, though.

Oh.

You’re kissing him. Steve is pretty sure his Spidey-Sense combusts completely along with his brain because your lips are on his and one of your hands is fisted in the front of his shirt. He’s not completely sure he isn’t dreaming until his right thigh bumps against the coffee table as he moves forward, leaning into the kiss, and it stings. Pain has never made him feel so giddy.

He’s awake. You’re kissing him, and this is real, and all the frustration Steve had been holding onto melts into fondness, into giddy excitement as his lips move against yours. They fit together better than he could have imagined.

One of his hands comes up to brush against your neck on its way to cup your cheek, and he feels you flinch. Oh, god, your neck. He’d completely forgotten about the bruising while he was caught up in the whirlwind of finally being able to kiss you.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” he apologizes, but you shush him. Your one hand is still gripping his shirt tightly, but your other comes up to push his hair out of his face. Your touch is gentle, the pads of your fingers feather light against his forehead, and he leans into your touch.

“S’okay, it’s not your fault,” you tell him. He presses his forehead to yours, panting slightly as your warm breath fans across his face. “Did you mean that? What you said about losing me?” Steve nods, and for the first time since this messy Thursday started Steve starts to feel like maybe the day isn’t so terrible because he sees a smile start stretching across your face. You’re here, you’re alive, and you kissed him. And he absolutely word vomited his feelings all over you, but you’re still here. And you kissed him. Did he mention that already? Yeah, he’s gonna think about that for a while.

“I’ll always do everything I can to protect you. I’d do anything for you,” he assures you, before continuing, “I promise I meant it. All of it.”

The way your eyes sparkle and he can see you perk up and look so much more like yourself as he says that has Steve feeling like the stick of butter he accidentally left on the stove the other day when he turned it on to make dinner; warm and melty. He loves it. “Me too,” you tell him. “I feel the same for you.”

The kiss had kind of confirmed that, but hearing it out loud seals the deal. Steve loves you, you at the very least like him like him, and he got to kiss you once. He wants to do that more than once, and right now seems like a fantastic time. But right as he goes in to take some initiative of his own and kiss you this time, Robin’s door flies open and she comes tumbling out into the living room. Steve jumps, his knees smashing into yours as he almost falls backwards onto the coffee table. You lean back in the chair too, looking over at Robin, who gets up and dusts herself off. Steve sees she has her phone in her hand, and her cheeks are bright pink as she stares at the two of you with her mouth agape.

“Oh my god, were you two finally about to kiss?” she asks, and Steve groans loudly because the moment is officially ruined. He was so close, too! God, yeah, Thursdays really do suck.

“Damn it, Robin!” he yells, dropping his face into his hands.

“No, no, pretend I’m not here! Go ahead!”

“We’re not gonna kiss with you watching! That’s weird!”

“No it’s not!” Robin insists. You shake your head, watching the two of them going back and forth. “Ugh, this is so unfair! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this to happen?”

“Not as long as me, I promise you that!” He moves one hand off of his face to throw a roll of soft bandages in Robin’s direction. It doesn’t sound like it connects, but he’ll get her back for this later.

He hears your phone start buzzing so much it falls off the arm of the chair. Steve doesn’t even want to know what kind of messages he’s getting right now and is absolutely glad his phone is somewhere on a rooftop right now. He swears he’s gonna end up blocking Dustin and Eddie again, and this time they’ll stay blocked for at least a whole day. Maybe two.

But he’ll definitely sneak in through your window later tonight, if you’ll let him, and steal a kiss of his own. The first of many, he hopes, and he can’t help the giddy smile on his face at the thought.

Yeah, Thursdays suck hard. But this one is definitely better than most.

...

tag list: @stevebabey

[eris-snow]

heyo! prince anon here. could u do a bakugo x a reader with adhd if ur up for that.

thanks if u can!

◇prince anon◇

Tags: bakugou x gn! adhd reader, fluff

hi prince :D Note for you at the bottom of the page :D

I can honestly imagine bakugou being your backbone when you get together. Like, no joke, he’d be the one to get your ass out of your bed in the morning and have minimum weekly cleaning out sessions of your room because he can’t stand the mess.

He’d love how expressive you are when you talk animately about something you like, and when you realise you’re rambling and try to stop, he’d just give you a soft, heart-melting smile and say “Go ahead. I know you’re not done yet.”

Would also promptly murder anyone who said you weren’t good for him, because they don’t see how much you struggle on that on your own.

Bakugou was just like a fire. Attention-catching and so bright, but get too close and you might be set ablaze. Anyone would be questioning if they deserved someone like him doting on you the best his emotionally-constipated ass could in his signature explosive way.

--

𝐑𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞

“I can’t wait for it!” You tell him excitedly. “Hero galas are always interesting, and the last time, there were so many top heroes there! I wonder if there are going to be heroes from different countries flying in. It’s not that big of an event, but I’m glad that they allowed us hero-course students to come—”

Bakugou smiles fondly when you spiral back into your rambling, packing up his own books as you recall the past year.

“Don’t forget your English homework, Y/n.” He rolls his eyes, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “Just ‘cause this is going on, doesn’t mean you’re getting out of essay writing.”

“Do I have to?” You groan, filing with your tie as you glance irritably at the clock. “I don’t wanna—”

“Start slacking and I’ll break up with you.” He threatens, grabbing your hand.

He’s come a long way now, thanks to you. He was never fond of PDA, but you kept doing it like he was incapable of hurting you and after some time, he became brave enough to initiate it.

You don’t flinch at his words, face simply pulling into a pout. “You wouldn’t dare.”

You’re right. Bakugou wouldn’t dare. Bakugou rolls his eyes and drags you to the dorms.

“Shut up and pretend like I would. Now c’mon. You need to settle your important shit first. I wanna hear you talk about that damn gala without getting interrupted by Aizawa yelling at us for not finishing schoolwork.”

--

If you want me to do more scenes of bakugou x adhd reader, just let me know via requests!

—

Note from author:

This was requested about a month ago and believe me when I say I’m so sorry for delaying it until this long 🥲. Hope I got the vibe you were looking for and if you want more different scenes, please feel free to suggest them in my requests!

[sparrowhero]

i feel like we don’t see enough of shigaraki being silly! ppl really skip over his funny side. could u write some hcs of tomura being silly w his s/o or just being goofy in general? thank u!

will do!

Silly Shigaraki x Reader

Honestly, he's not as mature as he'd like people to believe. He's a guy who sticks his tongue out at people behind their backs-- ESPECIALLY other league members. He's a lot freer with his facial expressions in general at the base so he makes a lot of very emphatic expressions.

Shigaraki is kind of easily embarrassed so his goofy side is reserved mostly for you when he's not being a little shit to other people. It's partially a leadership thing as well as a vulnerability/intimacy thing. He does mess around with them sometimes.

Will chase you around the base like a demented game of tag going "I'm gonna getcha!" This is scary looking to normal people because he goes hard as HELL but it's fun for you, I promise. There's something very satisfying for him to grab you and make you laugh/gasp and then blow a raspberry in your neck.

If you're goofy, he'll naturally feed off of your energy. He may not always contribute but he really does need (and enjoy) a good laugh-- especially if you're trying really hard to make HIM laugh. The chopsticks in the mouth as walruses? Loves it.

He has a rather immature sense of humor when it's not sarcastic remarks. But you know what? that's fair. Not really a fan of puns but he loves slapstick and stuff like that. if any of the league slipped on a banana peel he would ride that high for WEEKS.

One of the biggest gags that you and all the league do is that sometimes he'll repeat whatever you say with a straight face. He knows it's ridiculous, he thinks it's funny. Shit like "On the off chance the heroes find out about this, the results will be..."

"Shitty poopoo?" You offer.

"Exactly. Shitty poopoo." He says completely straight, perhaps lip twitching a little trying not to smile, and sends Toga and Twice into hysterics EVERY single time.

Shigaraki is the worst person in the WORLD to play competitive video games with I'm SORRY but he's SUCH a terrible winner. One of the times he really seems his age is when he goes on about how badly you sucked compared to him and how he COMPLETELY owned you. It's not necessarily goofy but this lightheartedness is in the same area for me.

As I've said before, he will roll his eyes at you if you throw completely off the wall what-ifs at him, but he will almost always play along. Those "I want a baby" text message memes? He's the guy who says to steal one, and to make it a good one.

Does the worst mocking All Might impressions in the world. They are always wrong, always different, but most importantly: they are ALWAYS funny.

You two like to make fun of those people on the internet who do those cutesy collage photos and challenges. He likes to put a twist on them so you guys just remake them in your room sometimes in just the most obnoxious and garbage way and then laugh at them together. Making the heart hands together pictures, stuff like that but with something going terribly wrong in the background.

[ahundredtimesover]

I loved the newest chapter and I think this was the largest stepping stone for a new arc in their relationship because before they were boss x assistant purely by the books (they strayed away sometimes) but after the scene (which was my favorite) of oc helping jk go through the thunderstorm and holding onto him while he’s having his anxiety attack, and also telling him she’ll always be there to help him in the future in case it happens again, they are now in a new territory where they genuinely know something more personal about each other. I have a feeling that this scene is going to be used again and really set up what the future of their relationship will be.

I’m also dying to do know more about jk’s mom bc I know she has a way bigger role than he’s letting on😣

ANDDDD namjoon🤭 im so excited she met him and researched his company because IF she does decide to go work there, it’ll be such a good change for her and she already loved the library so much and she helps so much w the decor aspect of the company, she’d fit right in. PLUS knowing how she thinks, there’d be no “romance” between her and joon since she doesn’t really like office romance minus jk. But I’m just excited to see her do something for herself and not be held back because life is only so short

AND the endinggggggg… im not as mad as other people because i got the feeling that JK didn’t move away as a form of breaking her heart or trying to put a boundary between them:

“He looks at you in panic, in apology, in fear, as if he’d had some sense knocked into him, as if he awakened from some spell that pushed him close to you, only to realize that that’s a place he can’t go. “

I think this part is essential because it shows us (to oc) that he looks apologetic to back away as if he didn’t mean to, but it’s a reflex. We know he doesn’t have a good history with relationships re:chaerin and he’s been living the life of a bachelor for years now, so finally feeling more than sexual attraction to someone who has proved to him that she is there for him in the emotional aspect too?? Yeah I’d run😅

I know there’s going to be a lot of angst before they finally stop being idiots but honestly, her being the assistant to him is definitely a huge barrier and idk much about South Korea work environment but I think that’s a huge power imbalance? (Even if I don’t think so because we already know oc runs him more than he runs her🙄) and it’d be frowned upon. Granted, I know they’d keep their relationship a secret in the beginning, but when they are finally a full fledge couple, she won’t be his assistant anymore, so I’m so excited to see what’s to come.

Oc already shot her shot, now it’s in jk’s hands, but I fear he’ll cause some issues before he finally comes to terms with it😑😑😑

But thank u Mimi for this story I love it so much, it genuinely gives me the feeling of reading a kdrama script because of how detailed it is and your world building is surreal🫶, I can’t wait to see what’s more to come of this story

AHHHH I LOVE THIS ASK SO MUCH BUT THIS IS A FAVE PART:

he’s been living the life of a bachelor for years now, so finally feeling more than sexual attraction to someone who has proved to him that she is there for him in the emotional aspect too?? Yeah I’d run😅

YES YES! Like, it’s one thing for him to think the feeling isn’t reciprocated, but to realize that it might be and what that would entail, it’s like, SHIT WHAT DO I DO!

The thing with this story - as reflected in OC’s, JK’s, Mr Ri’s Yoongi’s experiences - is that love isn’t straightforward and neither are relationships. We already know that JK and OC like each other but it’s not that simple. People deal with things that hinder their feelings from being expressed properly and received the way they intend. Things aren’t easy and sometimes they shouldn’t be. Like you also say, there’s going to be lots of angst before they stop being idiots and that’s what I intended as well 🤭 hence that idiot to lovers tag

On your point about SK work environment, I did search that such relationships are looked down upon (but idk someone can enlighten the audience hehe) but I tried to stray away from that (tho I’m not a proponent of it haha) which are both why I show how the MCs are so against it and are adamant about their boundaries. But at this point they just can’t resist each other but like I said, idiots. 😅 there’s Srsly like, a whole other aspect to the entire story that I’m not sure if u guys are ready for 🙃🙃

But we push on! Thank you so much for reading and sending this (love love hearing your guys’ analysis and theories and stuff) 💕💕

[koskela-knights]

Ao3 Ask Game

Thanks @autisticwriterblog for the tag :D

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

542 but that's going to change to 543 soon I hope ;)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

1,498,254 words 😳😱

3. What fandoms do you write for?

At the moment I'm still obsessed with Alan Wake 2. Gonna hit 111 works for it soon 😏 Which is why I'll try to focus on those works and becos this is my Koskela blog after all :D

4. Top five fics by kudos

Lmao, it's all DBH xD Used to be very active in that fandomD but my Top 5 AW fics would be:

Jacket (Ilmo/Alan)

Minds Collide (Zaneling, my only Zaneling fic lol)

Curious Case(y) (Scratch/Casey)

Off trail (Ilmo/reader)

Bleeding Hearts (Ilmo/Alan)

Honestly, I'm mainly proud of the first and last piece here.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to reply to every comment! Honestly, it's cool when a little convo ensues from that ;) I also save all comments in my jar (a word file) to reread whenever I'm suffering from imposter syndrome/feel down about my writing 😅

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Pheew... That's a tough question. I've written a whole bunch of angsty Hanahaki fics and general angsty shit in multiple fandoms.

Many early AW2 fics center on the aftermath of Jaakko's death ;_; Maybe Kaleidoscope is one of the angstiest endings but certainly not the only one

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

In the romance category that might gonna be the Slow Roasting Love ending. But the Koskelas at Pride was very happy too. Again, it's not easy to choose becos of how many different situations I've written about :P

For a Koskela or Huotari/Reader fic, I'd like to say the historical Ilmari x transmasc Reader where they're in an arranged marriage but Ilmari's a closeted gay man and reader is a closeted gay transmasc person so in the end it works out perfectly for them 🥺😏 It has a smut tag but smut only happens in the last chapter. It's a slowburn fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I think only once. I'm surprised and glad it hasn't happened much :P

9. Do you write smut?

Lol, my very first fic on there was smut. Once a smut writer, always a smut writer 😏

10. Craziest crossover?

I have a few post-apocalyptic series with a big mashup of seemingly unrelated fandoms together.

One being about Libraries where characters from Resident Evil meet PoTF characters, OCs and even Rose from Alan Wake so 😂

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Thankfully not.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Two of which one is published on ao3 too and the other on a Russian fan site :D Love when that happened 🙌🥰

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope. However, the Echoverse has come to life thanks to many discussions and conversations with @zephyrone01 and @copiasmic who have helped flesh out that world and given me prompt fuels for some of the fics

14. All time favourite ship?

Tough one, for the AW world it would be CultCase.

Be it in the echo-verse or extended from there in other AUs 😏 And its 'variations' in Ilmari x Kesä. I love their tragedy across several AUs. Same reason I also love Jaakoppi x Kesä

And the third OTP would now be Tim/Jaakko which, again, was born from the Echoverse

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I once started writing a fic about the Koskelas and the Huotaris and the importance of stars and them trying to escape their tragic fate by astral projection.

16. What are your writing strengths?

🤔Maybe that I write multiple oneshots and make it a series. So you have this idea of a bigger world, without having to write one big overarching story or plot :P

Also, if i'm rly into a fandom and am hyperfixated, that creativity just flows abundant lol

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Fight scenes. And believe it or not, sometimes I feel the smut isn't always as spicy as I want it to be xD especially if it's more than 2 people, that shit is tough to write. U don't want anybody neglected unless it's something a character is into 😂

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I love it, but it's definitely a challenge! I usually resort to/limit myself to some translated words.

So far I've written stuff with Spanish, Finnish or Dutch in it.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

It all started with The Evil Within back in 2014. I think you could see an improvement in my English as the years go on in fic writing :P

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Sticking to AW works.... I like multiple works lmao 😂 All for different reasons. I'd say the two series: YY but Different and the CultCase series. (I can't choose 1 fic 😭)

Some of those stories contained, are standalone oneshots, but all combined give you a vast look into these worlds.

One being about bisexual Kesä and his complicated relation with closeted Ilmari. And the relationships between him and Ahti and between the Huotari brothers and Ahti (WIP)

And then you have CultCase which also explores many interesting dynamics between characters 🥺

And both series have a lot of angst, but also some tenderness and softness in them. And smut 😏 Something for everyone can be found there

I tag @copiasmic @entropicquilibriumofchaos @changethecircumstances @juhospemmifer & others who might wanna join but no one's obliged to do these ofc

[thenotsolittlelady]

Oh thank you very much for the tag @ghilegab hun <3

1. Are you named after anyone? I was named after my dad’s grandma Lina who he liked very much and who I’ve never met :>

2. When was the last time you cried? Awwh man, yesterday I think? Watched Turning Red with my parents and these movies always make me cry (or anything, really... I cry easily, alright??)

3. Do you have kids? No and I’d rather not, they’re just not for me :x

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? I think I do, but only around people close to me, or else I’d be scared the other person might misunderstand

5. What is the first thing you notice about a person? Oh boi, I’d probably say their outfit? Or hair, cause that’s what I’m most inscure about myself :x

6. What’s your eye color? Blue with a bit of green!

7. Scary movie or happy ending? Both depending on what mood I’m in! It has to be the right kind of scary movie tho, I don’t like these gory murder movies very much 

8. Any special talents? Man, I honstly don’t know, I’d say I’m just perfectly average, nothing special about me at all tbh

9. Where were you born? In a stupid town near my tiny village in the middle of nowhere in Germany (I don’t like it there very much)

10. What are your hobbies? Drawing, video games/live streaming, singing and playing the piano, D&D, writing (sorta) and some other shit that I (would) like to do but can’t because what even is motivation

11. Do you have any pets? Just one cat, a black one called Lucky. He’s barely home tho and spends a lot of time at my aunt’s house next door :c I honestly miss him a lot xD I would love to have more cats and also dogs and birds too ;; A ;;

12. What sports do you/have you played? I did kung fu for a bit and I like to dance (I suck at it tho xD ). I would love to do more but... motivation and also there’s nothing to do where I live

13. How tall are you? 172cm 

14. Favo(u)rite subject in school? I hated school, but if I had to choose... probably Latin. I loved all the stories about horny gods, and heroes roaming around for years after a war and stories of everyday people in ancient rome and greece. That was nice!

15. Dream Job? I honestly don’t know, I wish I had an answer, but instead I’m just here wasting my “potential” and being a failure🥲

Bonus: any significance to your blog’s name? Not really, it’s based on my usual username on the internet “LittleLadyLina” which I am not very proud of  So yeah, I’m just a little lady (or not so little I suppose)

Alright, tags! @airanke @enydaghoul @leaphia and @lemonmancer if you guys wanna do this! ; v ; And of course whoever is reading this and wants to answer some questions as well :>

[prettyboykatsuki]

https://at.tumblr.com/prettyboykatsuki/ari-please-tell-me-i-wasnt-hallucinating-when-i/16p62n5fllnv

Not like I was checking my notifications for you a lot to see if you answered because I was about to cry or anything....😃😃🙂🙂 I really love your writing okay😭😭😭 and I am currently on my period, I wanted to read that story for comfort even though yes it's a horny ass story but I enjoy that shit, you won't believe I spent AN HOUR looking through all the tags I remembered for your story, I was like "Eremin" "eremika" "Eren x Armin" "poly" and I was like wtf😭😭😭😭 I was about to cry because I thought one of my favorite authors on here deleted their story or their account got deleted (I do follow you but I checked Tumblr first because it always shows up there so when I didn't find it I went on your page)😭

I have a huge adoration for you and I love your writing/talents so much so I was almost embarrassed to ask you even on anon, I was saying to myself, "the first anon message you send her is asking her about the smut story she wrote around summer last year😃," I haven't sent anon messages before because I'm shy AF but this time the urges was too strong I had to😂

Thank you for your beautiful stories btw, you seem so sweet and easy to talk to😭🥺💖 your reply to my ask was so nice💖😭

ANON YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS WHAT IM GOING TO BITE UR CHEEK!!!!

also do not worry i am also like that when im my period!! no shame in getting comfort off of some emotionally charged porn babey thats me too!! honestly i am simply more flattered that i can be that story for you!!! i haven't written anything meaningful in so long i am simply feeling like a wet blob about my own content so it made me incredible happy that u wanted to read and i hope u enjoy it on the reread!!!!!!

thank YOU for your lovely question. i dont think i am too hard to talk to but i am a piss poor texter in my opinion so im always rlly slow with answering asks. do not worry about being shy!!!! i do not bite unless someone asks explicitly ajddjk. i love u so kindly!!!! do not be embarassed and thank u again

[skateyoulater]

thank you @kinnbig for tagging me I don’t usually do these but tonight LFG

❥ name: rae/rachel

❥ sign: aries

❥ height: 5'6

❥ time: 19:31

❥ birthday: 1st of April///April Fools Day (No I am not kidding ksasksjks)

❥ fav band/artist: honestly these days I don’t have a fav, I was always big into My Chemical Romance and All Time Low back in the day but now I just listen to whatever takes my fancy! I’m big on Stray Kids at the moment but sixth months ago I’d have told you a totally different answer!

❥ last movie: Semantic Error the movie!

❥ last show: I’m currently in the middle of watching Kingdom: Legendary War! But I’m also watching half a dozen currently airing BLs including Never Let Me Go, My School President, and Between Us.

❥ when I created this blog: bestie I don’t know. I’ve existed on Tumblr in one form or another since about 2012 lmao

❥ what I post: whatever garbage happens to be in my brain that day. Usually a wide variety of BL and GL content, but also shitposts and occasionally bands/kpop. It’s a pick and mix bag!

❥ other blogs?: yes. no you’re not having them.

❥ do I get asks?: on the odd occasion. If I’m being honest, I’m terrible at checking my inbox because I always am on tumblr mobile, so I could have dozens of messages that I’ve just,,,, not seen sksjksj

❥ followers: 1129 :) though most of the poor bastards are from my pre-BL days meaning they’ve been subjected to a huge shock when I came back from my thumblr hiatus (which lasted about 4 years).

❥ average hours of sleep: I usually get about 7, but I can and will sleep 10 if I’m allowed to.

❥ instruments: Clarinet when I was younger, guitar currently :)

❥ what I'm wearing: baggy shorts, band tshirt, and comfy socks. It’s a lazy kinda evening ya’ll.

❥ dream trip: I would love to pack my shit away for a year and just explore wherever I wanted to go without any limits. Spent a week in one place, then decide on the fly where to go next. No planning involved, just vibes!

❥ fav songs right now: My currently spotify on repeat is a mess! but uhhhhhhhhh

닐리리맘보 - Block B

Hero - Monsta X

Dandelions - Ruth B

Maniac - Stray Kids

Night Changes - One Direction

Red Lights - Stray Kids

Say My Name - Ateez

Poison - PinkFantasy

Silly Boy - Lynks

I - Taeyon

Imaginary Friends - Voila ft Hey Violet

This is Halloween (Cover) - Izzy Reign

Love Me Like You Do (cover) - Living in Fiction

U Love It - Sophie Powers ft $atori Zoom

sorry if you’ve been tagged before but uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i forgor @stillqueerstillhere @hello-n-goodbye @alt-drama @letsabandonthisworld @first-kanaphan @neppu @sunflower-lychee @ieroween1031 @jimins-crooked-tooth​

[aeonianarchives]

What emojis would you assign to your mutuals and why? Pass it on, share the fun 💫💞

Honestly Idk most my Mutuals the only one i really interact is, is U Tara 😬

well not the only one you are the only one, I need to get better at interacting with my Mutuals 😅 but i'm the person who normally waits for the other person to text first.

ALSO WHEN DID I HIT 300 FOLLOWERS HOLY SHIT Tara why did u make me realize 300 give some more follow me for the random crap I make.

Some of my mutuals scare me with how talented they are for those Mutuals 😱😨😬 - why are you on this little blog of mine, i made as a dare most of you are so much better than I am especially the Artists that i am Mutuals with even if we do not talk.

@eunoiaastralwings - my dear mutual who is like the only one i interact with and i am comfortable being a dumbass infront off with my bull shit: 💖✨🍁

You just give me sparkly vibes and their are 3 of them like the Silmarils the precouis Silmarils U R Nerdanel's Silmarils but she won't go as Batshit crazy as Fëanor did over his he emotionally unstable individual who needs anger management and like his Silmarils u r precious and a treasure to this world, and heart because their r no finger heart emoji's but i want to smother u in platonic affection because you deserve it, you give me massive fall vibes

@elablackcat- I think ur tags r still broke if not the earth says hello tis ur scavenger writer, ik we mostly interact over discord: ⚔️✉️🐈‍⬛

You are also amazing and I also give you finger hearts, you impress me a lot you always have such good ideas i always nick em and end up writing them for u a dream most people wish their fanfics write em selves yours do most of the time, you give me black cat vibes and it is in ur username so /shrug, also you are the reason i write so much for Glorf x Thel x Lindir if i didn't have someone who i knew would like it i don't think i would of even start writing for that soft boy ship you have made me write for so many ships that i wouldn't write before because before they were self indulgent and for that fact i thank you.

I will try and get better with interacting with my mutual this ask game made me realize i am somewhat shit at it.

To all my Mutuals even if i don't interact with you I love you /Platonic

for all of my mutuals have head pats.

[mosviqu]

IT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH AND I HATE ALL OF THE THINGS I GOT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS ERA THEIR HARD WORK IS NOT APPRECIATED ENOUGH WAHHH

i didn't even have the motivation to check out the last song from them ngl💔💔very sad about them but maybe i will like it after watching music shows lmao i wont give up (fully) on the 03liners💔 WAITTTT TRUE HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT INTAK WHAT THE HECK I WAS SO HAPPY ABOUT HIM (and same i saw that they are having a cb and i was like:o i forgot about u guys:o) AN AMAZING CREW!!!! also would selfishly add enhypen sunoo he is a lovely 03 liner as well🥹 (idk know mcnd☹️☹️ i heard like 2-3 of their songs but i never checked them out☹️ BUT IM HAPPY THERE IS AN 03 LINER IN THERE!!!)

IT IS IMPORTANT BUT IM STILL NOT SURE IF ITS 100% TRUE😭 i love keeho so much like that was the point where i was like yeah u are going to be my fav from here!! seeing the screenshots of it still makes me laugh so much

i can imagine that😭 my sister was in the exact same situation as u💀

IT WAS!!!! dino is lovely and i would love to see u being his body guard ngl🤣 I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY DIDNT DO IT💔💔just such a big heartbreak💔💔ALSO TALKING ABOUT TREASURE DID U HEAR THE SNIPPET HE POSTED OF A SONG??? it sounds very great imo

I CAN SO RELATE TO THAT!!! english is so hard without english classes i never realized that till now💔 i only talk in english with my sister but it's a mess i even just struggle to put together sentences now😭 writing my replies takes so much brain cells from me so i always just pray that u will get what i'm trying to say even if it's not correct lmao🥸 RECORDING VLOGS IS SO MUCH FUN!! i did it for a while and it was so amazing so i recommend it only sent them to my bestie but it was actually so funny😭 THE BRITISH PEOPLE GOT US REAL HARD💔

(AHHH THANK U SO MUCH;-; I APPRECIATE IT!!! HANBIN!!! I HOPE U WILL HAVE MORE MOMENTS OVER HIM LMAO HE IS VERY GREAT😌 although be careful with asking me about zbone members cuz idk three of them;-; but working on it🤞 and u can tag me or message me ofc i dont mind🥹💕) (liebestraum anon🥳💕)

LITERALLYYYY i saw a tiktok where it compared all the other dances where its a member x woman (ten or baek) and it said "so this is okay, but this isnt?" showing enha and the comments were like "we are the problem" LMAO so at least they are self-aware.

no because i was really disappointed too >:(( but the title track still slaps i said what i said. watched them perform it too and they have cute bubbly vibes i am heartbroken for the lack of interest from my side. NO BC WHEN I STARTED BIASING INTAK AND REALISED HE WAS A 03 LINER I HAD A MENTAL BREAKDOWN. ((still am a jiung girlie at heart tho). i am really excited for their cb tho it sounds amazing!!! HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT SUNOO WHAT THE FUCK AAAAAAAAAA IM SO SORRY he's my fav 03 liner. ((there are actually 2 03 liners in mcnd but i forgot the other one LMAO i honestly cant remember their names anymore but i had a very short mcnd phase lol. all i know is that i'd die for minjae thats all)

i would honestly be a good bodyguard bc i have a lot of rage in me. like i could fully fight someone if i was mad enough LMAOO. everything for dino baby <3 I DID SEE THE SNIPPET I LOST MY SHIT LOWKEY HIGHKEY I AM SO EXCITED AAAAAAA

i mean english isnt really hard for me if we are talking abt writing and stuff but speaking out loud is more difficult if you don't regularly do it >:( dont worry we are on the same wavelength i always know what u mean w your replies AHAH sometimes i speak in eng w my roommate bc she is an english major (she only picked the major bc of me and then i ended up doing psychology so i owe her this bc her english isnt as good as mine) I USED TO RECORD VLOGS W MY BROTHER but we never posted them thank god. i'm still down to do it honestly its so fun LMAO

hanbin.......i looked up his name on tiktok once and now my fyp is filled with him and im so in love he's so cute and adorable and sweet like i saw clips of ppl giving him letters and how much he loves getting them and even asked if anyone has letters for him please zb1 fans give him letters!!!!!! no bc i only know ricky, hanbin, zhang hao and matthew :,) but the more i see them on my fyp the more i am convinced to stan once they debut like i legit debated on watching boys planet yesterday bc i lowkey like survival shows but when i found out the eps are 2 hours long i decided to just....not...do that...

also a small update on the tbz recs i did some progress and i really liked diamond life and survive the night :p i have like 11 songs left from the ones u recommended LMAO but yeah i loved those two

[avocado-writing]

Had to really keep this one concise, bc I could have gotten very carried away with it!

GN!Reader x Tangerine

Tagging: @honestlywtfisgoingon​​ @white-wolf-buckaroo​ @felhomaly @sinfulrefugy​​ @venusthepirate​​ @lunarpansexual​ @wanderedaway​​ @georgiee-riviere​​ @mushywutty​​​​ (thank u konront for the gif!)

Tangerine is a businessman, or that’s what he likes to call himself anyway.

It just so happens that his business consists of beating the shit out of anyone who upsets or disrespects his boss. And he’s very good at beating the shit out of those sorts of people. So good he’s made a career out of it, actually.

A lot of people see him and know enough about him that they keep well out of his way. And honestly, he likes it that way. Being feared.

Or at least he thought he did.

And then he sees your smile.

They’re walking down the street, on the way to a bakery Lemon has convinced him they need to go in before they start work today. 

“Best croissants I’ve ever had in my life,” Lemon assures him. Tangerine wrinkles his nose up.

“Croissants? What’s wrong with a sausage roll?”

“There’s nothing wrong with a sausage roll, but I’m not gonna start my day with it, am I? Croissants are breakfast food.”

“I’ll break something in a minute,” Tangerine mutters, but Lemon has pretty much learned to ignore him at this point.

The bakery does smell lovely, Tangerine will concede that. And the display case is full of delicious-looking, meticulously-crafted little cakes and pastries. 

It’s not them that he ends up staring at, though.

Your smile lights up the whole room. Like a fucking ray of sunshine dressed in a bakery uniform. As soon as you spot Lemon, you’re already holding out a little takeaway bag.

“Morning, Lemon! Here you go - regular order, hot out of the oven,” you say, cheerfully. Lemon grins.

“What would I do without you, eh?”

“Have one cold, I suppose,” you laugh. It’s like music to Tangerine’s ears. Then you finally seem to see him. The next smile, directed at him, threatens to knock Tangerine off his feet.

“Who’s your friend?”

“My brother,” says Lemon, “Tangerine.”

“Oh! This is Tangerine. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Tangerine gets a funny feeling in his chest over the idea that you know anything about him. And yet, you don’t seem afraid. 

He realises there’s no way you can know what he and Lemon do for a living.

“All good, I hope,” Tangerine manages. 

“Well, mostly about how you don’t like our pastries even though you haven’t even tried one,” you say, crossing your arms over your chest, simulating telling him off. You get an idea, and use your serving tongs to bag up another croissant.

“Here. On the house. Maybe I can win you over.”

Truth be told, you already have.

His fingers brush yours when he takes the bag. Lemon pays for his own order and a coffee to go, putting a lot of money into the tip jar on the counter.

The croissant is delicious.

Tangerine comes back the next day, without Lemon this time. The bell rings as the door opens and you seem surprised to see him.

“Oh, hello! It’s you again. Where’s your brother?”

“I came alone today,” he says. He has the urge to readjust his hair, even though he already fixed it about five times on his way here. 

“Did you like the croissant?”

He finds himself smiling at how easily you talk to him.

“It was lovely, actually.”

“See! I knew you’d like it. Do you want another one today?”

“What I want,” Tangerine says, “is to take you out to dinner.”

He’s nervous. He doesn’t like it. He’s never nervous. But the idea that you might say no churns his stomach like an ocean storm.

You seem surprised at this request. Wide-eyed, open-mouthed. The fact you don’t immediately answer eggs him on to say more.

“One dinner. And if you don’t have a good time, I swear I’ll never set foot in this bakery again. Can’t say the same for Lemon, though. He loves this place.”

You smile at that, regaining your composure.

“Well, alright, then. I close the place up at six.”

So he’s back ten hours later, finding you shutting the security gate over the storefront. You’re wearing a black jumper and a pair of jeans. His heart threatens to stop in his chest.

“Oh, Tangerine! You came.”

“You seem surprised.”

You shrug. 

“I’m used to being stood up, I guess.”

Tangerine wants to find anyone who’s ever stood you up and make them suffer for it. Instead he settles on walking you to the very fancy restaurant that cleared a reservation for two this evening, when he made it clear who he worked for. 

“I feel… thoroughly underdressed,” you decide, looking around after you’ve been seated. 

“What? No you’re not, love.”

You scoff.

“Oh, come on. Look around. You’re in a three-piece suit, and I have flour on my sleeve.”

He hates the way you shy into yourself. Trying to make yourself smaller, as if apologising to the world for existing.

“You look wonderful,” he states, honestly.

And there’s that smile again.

The evening goes brilliantly. You speak animatedly about your business, and he asks lots of questions about baking that you’re all too happy to answer. You order a salad, but when he guesses if that’s what you really want you seem relieved and ask for a steak instead. He watches you laugh at his jokes, respond to his flirting with your own.

Then the gunmen ruin it.

He knows his boss’s rivals around this area, and can identify another gang on sight. You let out a shocked, fearful gasp as the door is kicked in, and the assailants ready their weapons.

Tangerine, however, is a professional.

And very, very angry his date has been ruined.

“Get down,” he states, pulling his pistol out. For a moment you’re frozen with fear. But when he takes aim and shoots one of the men in the head, you find enough of your wits to dive under the table.

He’s glad you don’t see what happens. Or, at least, have a very obscured view. Because it seems like the gunmen didn’t count on him being in the restaurant. The next five minutes are brief but bloody. His suit gets stained when he pulls the trigger at one of them at point blank range and that makes him even more furious. He’s far more aggressive than he needs to be from that moment on, using his knuckle dusters out of anger than necessity.

When he’s done there’s a metallic tang tainting the air. He heads back to where he told you to hide, gets down on one knee and peers beneath the tablecloth.

Your eyes are wide, full of tears, and it breaks his heart.

“Tangerine,” you whisper, “what… what do you do?”

He smiles, thinly.

“Businessman, love.”

[xpeachesncream]

lowkey (jjk) | 02.

⦿ boo’d up in the daytime

⦿ mackin’ & hangin’ in the nighttime

↳ series masterlist

summary: in order to pass organic chemistry and pay off your car damages from an accident, all you have to do is help the nerd, jeon jungkook, with a few things: pretend to be his girlfriend and teach him the ways of dating.

pairing: popular!reader x nerd!jjk

genre: college au, fake dating au, friends (with benefits?) to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 3.2k

warnings: cussing, implied sexual content/mature language, kissy-kissy koo, mentions of a boner, mention of sex and cum, seokjin’s still toxic

note: posting this chapter a little early since it’s butter weekend, plus the last part of liquid courage should be up sat/sun. still sticking to my schedule in my faq though, srry loves! i’ll do my best to update as soon as i can. 💗

tags: @taegularities​ @jimidol​ @miinoongi​ @bluesharksandfish​ @ggukkieland​ @unicornbabylover​ @thebeebi​ @preciouschimine​ @ladyartemesia​ @moonchild1​ @jikookiekosmos​ @marcoazz2​ @kootaes​ @wearenot7withu​ @codeinebelle​ @bigbootyjoonie​ @thisartemisnevermisses​ @maichiverse​ @ppeachyttae​ @fairysunooo​ @secretlycrazyhummingbird​ @yukiehyukie​

"I heard you were in an accident last night, babe. Are you okay? I'm so sorry I got mad at you yesterday." Seokjin comes towards you, cupping your face to look at every inch, every detail. You move away from his hold, backing up to give yourself some space.

"Seokjin, I told you to stop calling me that. Jesus. I'm fine. Don't need you to check up on me."

"Are you really gonna keep that up? I said I was sorry."

"Okay, and? I heard you."

"Really, that's it? Y/N, why are you being like this? What's the real reason?" He follows after you as you make your way to the library. To say Seokjin was persistent is an understatement— he was persistent for the wrong reasons. Like, keeping you close so he had you to fall on when things went wrong with another chick, his safety net.

"Because this is done, I don't know how many times I have to tell you. I'm tired of you doing this so, please. Just go." You slightly turn towards him as you climb up the stairs.

"I wanna work this out with you. Don't push me away. Let me help." You don't respond. He watches as you adjust your bag strap and wave at Jungkook. Seokjin chuckles and grabs your wrist gently, making Jungkook suddenly hop on defense as he balls his fists. Like he could do shit. Seokjin would probably wreck his ass with those broad shoulders.

Still. He hated how much of an asshole he was to you.

"Wait, what the fuck?" Seokjin laughs his rare, deep laugh that he uses when he's caught off guard. "You're hanging out with nerds, now?"

"And if I was, that would be none of your business." You snatch your arm away while glaring at him. You shake your head and continue walking towards Jungkook, relieved Seokjin finally left you alone today. Probably off to tell Namjoon, Yoongi and his friends how much of a bitch you've been and that you actually left him to hang out with a nerd.

Sunmi knows you're being tutored. However if that wasn't the case, she would question you, but she never take their side on shit. She remained loyal to you, and always supported you through whatever. That's why she's remained your bestfriend until this day. The senior chicks Seokjin and them hung around with though? Questionable. As long as Sunmi was by your side and you by hers, you both didn't care much for getting close to them.

"Hey, sorry you had to see that." You say as you sigh and set your bag down alongside of you on the long table.

"It's alright." Jungkook replies softly. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. Thanks." You give him a tiny, tightlipped smile. "So, should we get right into tutoring, or should we talk about the details of our deal? I have all afternoon." Luckily, it was quite loud in the loud section of the library. No one cared much to listen in to your secret deal with Jungkook, nor did anyone care because it was Jungkook.

"I do too. I guess, whatever works for you?"

"Let's get this tutoring over with first then iron out the rest." He nods.

"Sure." He pulls out his notebook. "Tell me, what are you struggling with?"

"Everything." He does a small head tilt.

"I doubt that. I'm sure you understand some things."

"No, you don't understand Jungkook. I'm legit drowning. I don't know what I'm doing wrong or where I'm lacking." Jungkook simply looks at you, lips pressed together before he nods. You're not lacking anywhere, he thinks. You're really not. The subject is just shitty and the spawn of the devil.

"That's okay. Well, can I go over some basics? Throw in some tips?"

"Yes, please. Lead the way. I need you." You chuckled, but it makes the heat rush to his cheeks. He hopes you don't catch the rosy tint creeping up on them, so he instantly grabs at the whiteboard near your table and starts to go over the very beginning, the very basics of this semester's OChem class. Maybe a bit from last semester, but last semester wasn't entirely that bad compared to this one.

He didn't expect you to be all that engaged for some reason, but he should have known you'd ask questions left and right, taking the black whiteboard marker from his hand to practice what you've learned with him watching and guiding you from your side. You were always focused, always so determined. You were incredibly smart. Incredibly beautiful.

Honestly, Jungkook go on for days.

The both of you hadn't realized it was nearing close to 5PM and neither of you had really eaten much since lunch. You sit, feeling pretty good about your first session with Jungkook. You feel a little bad having kept him for so long over OChem, realizing you still had things to iron out with him.

[sunmi] 4:34pm: hey babe, not gonna be leaving for a bit. i forgot i had to work on this psych project with jennie. you okay with leaving around 6/7?

"Crap."

"What's the matter?" Jungkook glances at you as you continue to stare at your phone and scroll away.

"Sunmi isn't leaving until later. I'll probably be stuck here for a little longer after you leave." You put your phone down, now resting your chin against your palm, nails slightly digging into your cheek.

"I-I can give you a ride, if you'd like? Plus, we still need to talk.. about stuff." He shyly says.

"Jungkook, that's too much to ask for."

"It's really not a big deal. How far do you live from campus?"

"Maybe a 10 minute drive, the next exit off the freeway." He shrugs.

"I'm going in that direction too."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. We can just talk on the way home."

"Would you be willing to stop by for dinner? We can talk then. Maybe it can be considered our 'first date.'" You joke with a small giggle.

"Oh, sure. Yeah." He gives off a tiny, nervous laugh. "Where did you have in mind?"

"Can we get.. hm—" You hum. "Fire Wings? Down the street?" He almost feels intoxicated watching how your eyes gleam under the light, how they brighten and widen when you mention food. You were cute, and you didn't even know it.

"Only if you tell me what flavors you get." He tries to get smart, which makes you laugh. He made you laugh.

"Is this judgment day? Gonna see if you should call quits on our deal before it even starts?"

"Maybe." He goes along with it.

"Okay. Garlic Parmesan and Dragon." You pack up your things before shooting him a look.

"Okay, solid flavors." He nods. "I guess we can continue on."

"You're funny." You giggle as you both throw your bags onto your backs. You stay in your position until Jungkook comes to your side so you can walk by him. You don't know much about him, but he has a soft demeanor and he makes you feel comfortable. You had only seen him a couple of times across campus, not really noticing him much in class either. You feel a little bad knowing you didn't even try being that he sat behind you, but better late than never I guess? Maybe there was a reason for all of this happening. The way he tutored you today was insane, too— he was super smart, but broke it down perfectly, was patient. He was patient.

No wonder Dr. K loved his ass.

"What about you?" You picked up the conversation.

"I usually go for a dry rub and Garlic Parmesan."

"I haven't tried any dry rubs."

"You can try one of mine later."

"Okay." You suddenly remember to shoot Sunmi a text before she comes looking for you everywhere on campus. Jungkook stays silent beside you, allowing you to do your thing without being too overbearing or nosy.

But, he honestly can't help but glance a few times.

[y/n] 5:11pm: sorry just saw this, hitching a ride with my tutor. don't worry about me! ty ily, have fun working on your project.

[sunmi] 5:13pm: tutor, as in jeon jungkook?

[y/n] 5:15pm: yeah, he offered.

[sunmi] 5:16pm: okay, that was nice of him. if he tries anything tho i'll beat his ass. text me when u get home?

[y/n] 5:17pm: don't worry about him, he won't lol i will.

[sunmi] 5:18pm: kk love u b

"Sorry." You say, tucking your phone into your pocket. "Had to text Sunmi."

"That's okay. You two are really close, right?"

"Yeah, since high school."

"Cool." At this point, Jimin, Taehyung and Hoseok are coming out of the café at the same you two are passing.

"What about you, where are your friends?"

"Um." He sighs, trying to avoid his friends obnoxiously waving and calling him from the distance. You glance over from behind his figure, chuckling a little bit. "That's them."

"Cute. You all are really close, too?"

"Ya, I've known Jimin the longest though." You smile and wave at them, causing them to gasp and whisper amongst each other with huge smiles on their faces.

"I'll need to meet them if we're gonna do this thing for real. Do they know?"

"Yeah kinda."

"That's okay. We should probably work on keeping it between us though." He nods.

"Okay, but. Can we save meeting them for later? They're a bit.. much." You smile.

"Sure."

"D-do I have to meet Sunmi?" You nod.

"If you wanna make this believable, yeah."

"She's kinda scary."

"Jungkook, she's not gonna bite your head off. She just has that look, but I promise she's sweet." That look, that resting bitch face. Really, you could be biased because it's Sunmi. She really only had issues if she felt disrespected. Other than that, she meant well. Same with you— you've been accused of being intimidating and having the same look but you don't mean any harm by it.

"Okay." Jungkook unlocks his black 2016 Honda Civic and pops his bag in the trunk. You do the same, while Jungkook goes to open the passenger door for you.

"Thanks." You smile sweetly at him. He climbs into his seat, hitting the button to start the car and sighs. The music in the background starts to play, and it sounds mellow, soothing— like it came straight out of a fairytale. His eyes widen as he rushes to lower the volume before shyly looking at you.

"Sorry."

"What, no. Don't be. What is this?"

"A Final Fantasy lofi mix." He begins to drive off as you turn the volume back up.

"It's nice. Pretty relaxing."

"Ya, it's nice to listen to after a long day." He pushes his glasses up at the light.

"Do you have family here?" He nods.

"I do. My mom and dad live about an hour away. I'm the only child. What about you?"

"Same. They're probably 30 minutes up north."

"Do you live alone?"

"Yeah, I live in a studio. It's actually my coworker's. She bought the space to rent it out. She lets me rent it for pretty cheap though."

"That's nice."

"You?"

"I live with Jimin. Our parents are close."

"What about your other friends?"

"Hoseok is dorming, and Taehyung would rather live back home with his family and commute. He's close to them. He'll crash at ours or Hoseok's from time to time."

"Are you close to your family?" He nods as he turns into the plaza lot.

"I suppose, yes. I'm just really quiet overall, so they think it's hard to read me sometimes." He parks and you watch as he shuts the car off with the same button. "You?"

"Yeah, I'm really close to my mom. Dad, a little questionable."

"Why, if I may ask?" He comes to open your door again, causing you to give him a small smile.

"He, um. Just got into some stuff." He watches as your body tenses while you fiddle with your fingers waiting in line.

"It's okay, don't think about it. I won't ask again."

"It's okay, Jungkook. Really. Maybe another time?" You look up at him and he nods. He stands way taller than you, almost at Seokjin's height, if not the same. He likes to wear baggy, dark clothing and doesn't do much to fix or style his hair.

He's simple, but in a good way.

You both order your food with Jungkook going first so he can grab a table afterwards. Before he could pay though, you offer to cover him for dinner as your way of thanking him for driving you home. You make your way over to the table he snags, Jungkook silently sitting at the high table with his legs pressed together and his hands clasped tightly on his lap.

"You okay?"

"Ya, why?"

"You look tense."

"Sorry. It's not everyday I have dinner with Y/N." You smile.

"Stop, relax." You watch as he slightly eases up. "So, this deal." He nods. "A month?"

"Yeah, I suppose."

"We have to convince people it's real or else people will know something weird is going on." You look at his hand, now resting on the table. "You're gonna have to hold my hand and kiss me, you know?" He swallows the lump in his throat. Shit, he thinks. Don't know if I can actually pull this off?

A kiss?! Fuck.

"Y-yeah."

"When was your last relationship, Jungkook?"

"8th grade." Your eyes widen.

"O-oh, now I see."

"What's that supposed to mean? It's terrible, I know but I—"

"No, no, no. You're good. It's totally okay, it doesn't matter. I'll just have to teach you to make it look realistic and not.. awkward." You perk up again. "Not saying that you are though, okay."

"I know."

"So, are you.."

"Am I..?" He cocks hid head to the side in confusion.

"Like.."

"Just ask Y/N."

"Are you a virgin?"

"I don't know." You furrow your brows.

"Huh?"

"Look, this is gonna sound really embarrassing and I don't know if I'm even ready to tell my fake girlfriend about it."

"Just say it. We have to know things about each other." He sighs.

"I— ugh." He groans. "I did it with my girlfriend at the time. Or I guess my ex because we had broken up and this was sometime during freshmen year in high school and she came onto me out of nowhere at a mutual friend's pool party. But it was weird because we were just hormonal kids and I was just curious so I slipped myself into her only to slip back out right after because—" He's rambling, but you're doing your best to keep up.

"Because?"

"I-I, ugh. Y/N." He shuts his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose. "Are you really gonna make me say it?"

"Jungkook." You lean a bit to try and catch eye contact.

"I came right away." He says just as the worker puts down your food and takes the number from your table.

"Ohhhhhhh." You say as you nod slowly. "Okay."

"You can just run now." His head hangs low as he slowly slides his chicken over in front of him, causing you to chuckle.

"I'm not going anywhere. It's okay. Stop that."

"It's pathetic."

"No. Besides, I know you'll get better overall, and you'll find someone who will rock with you till the end. We'll work on this."

"Thanks." He says, feeling comfortable around you. You were quick to reassure him and smile at him, he felt himself melting in his seat. Yeah, you were too good for Seokjin.

"You'll have to come to parties with me. Club events. Events in general. It won't look right if I'm always going without you."

"Okay. Can I bring my friends?"

"Sure." He nods. "What do you do in your free time?"

"Play video games and listen to music. Read comics, manga. Build lego sets with the guys."

"Cute." You smile.

"You?"

"Hang out with Sunmi, or just watch movies on my own at my place. Read. Eat by myself. Explore by myself. I value my alone time."

"It's nice." Jungkook's familiar with it. Even if he had his friends around, he truly liked being in his own peace when allowed. "What about outside of the public eye?"

"Hm?" You hum.

"Do we hang out?"

"Yeah we can." You nod.

"Cool." He smiles.

"Is my car gonna be a lot of work for you?"

"Don't worry about it, it'll be good soon. Just might take a bit cause I need some parts to make it look brand new again."

"I really can't thank you enough." He shrugs.

"Only trying to help my girlfriend out." He boldly says, causing you to laugh.

"Confidence is peeking through already, are you sure you need me?" You joke. The rest of the evening, you continue to talk to Jungkook about pretty surface level shit— what you like, dislike, overall experience in high school and college so far. It was a nice, harmless conversation, one where you were starting to see how warmhearted Jungkook really was. How real and laid back.

None of the shit in Seokjin's group. It was refreshing, a breath of fresh air.

Once dinner had finally finished, Jungkook was on his way to drop you off. He had parked in an empty guest spot, offering to walk you up just to be sure. At the door, he took a peek at how clean your studio was, mainly soft colors of white and cream taking over, with plants scattered around your living room area. The hallway in was sandwiched between your kitchen area and another wall, Jungkook assuming your bed was on the opposite side of it. He awkwardly stands at the door, afraid of overstepping.

"Well, goodnight Y/N. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Hey, wait." You smile and come close to him. He swallows, his mouth suddenly feeling dry when he feels your breasts press against his chest. "First lesson— give me a kiss."

"Right now?"

"Jeon Jungkook, we're doing this tomorrow. People are gonna have to see this at least once while we're together." He nods and presses a quick kiss against your cheek. "Not bad, but a little longer?" He complies and presses another kiss, leaving his pillowy lips against your cheek for a little longer before pulling away. "Perfect. Now here." You point at your lips before crossing your arms.

"Y/N, I—"

"Don't be afraid, just do it. I won't kick you in the balls or anything."

"It's not that. I just don't think I'm a great at this stuff."

"Okay." You tippytoe and gently grab his jaw while you lean towards his face. "Just relax, okay? Don't think too much of it." He stays silent, doe eyes constantly on you as you continue to inch forward.

Sparks. Just sparks everywhere for Jungkook.

He feels your soft lips against his and he relaxes, moreso because he feels like he's lost all senses being this close to you. Taking in your scent. Kissing you.

"There." He stands still, still trying to process the kiss. "Not bad. We'll get better over time, but at least that looks believable. Just—" You put his hands down as they were about to fall onto your hips during the kiss, but they fell short. "Let it happen and hold me, okay?" You smile. "Night Jungkook."

"N-night." He stutters as he watches you close the door. "Fuck." He whispers to himself when he realizes he's now sporting a boner. "Jungkook, what the fuck is this?!" He continues to whisper to himself as he waddles down your hallway.