#hope y'all will understand

[nomlioart]

another epico art trades for @misdreavusplush and @woobab 👁️<3

these will be the last art trades sorry fellas- </3

[cuties-in-codices]

mary & elizabeth

from a cycle of miniatures, possibly originally preceding a psalter, muri (?), first half of the 12th c.

source: Sarnen, Benediktinerkollegium, Cod. membr. 83, fol. 2r

[beanghostprincess]

zolu is a very asexual couple in the sense that they do have sex and are attracted to each other but their attraction doesn't come from the arousal of seeing each other's bodies sexually. it comes from possessiveness and passion and the privilege of worshipping the other to the point of needing to touch and pleasure each other. their relationship goes so beyond love and sex that their way of making love is indescribable. they need each other emotionally and physically in every way.

[bri-does-art]

You know, for the spin off CotA thing, I'm pretty sure moon would be the type to sneak out of his tank and eat the expensive fish in other tanks, just because. Could also see him being the one to throw shrimp at people, also just because he can

Oh, absolutely. He absolutely does sneak out to help himself to tasty, forbidden snacks. Not just rare and expensive fish, but also morsels saved for other residents of the facility.

It can be quite the headache for employees, when the meal they were supposed to go fetch has suddenly disappeared into thin air. But he's clever enough not to do it too often, and not to target the same species too predictably, lest the staff get wise and catch him in the act. He knows he could get in quite the trouble if he eats too many expensive midnight snacks.

Speaking of trouble.

He also does throw stuff at people. He used to throw a lot of little things at guests - especially if it could get a few laughs out of some kiddoes, instead of tears (he is big, he has thin needle teeth, he glows red, and his area is kept dark for his comfort, and unfortunately sets the children on edge before they even see him). But after getting into trouble a few times too many with angry, soaked parents, he's learned to be... smarter about picking his targets.

And if you're thinking this tank looks a bit small, low-set, and the guests a little too easy to reach, this can't be Moon's tank...

That's because it isn't. :)

[modmad]

TPoH: update and HIATUS

Page time! Scopo warning for this one.

Please note I am now for the first time taking a MONTH'S BREAK so that I can recover my health and attend to matters irl that I cannot if I am doing the comic (including having a friend over for 2 weeks yayyy). The comic will resume on the 15th of October.

whoopsy doodle!!! due to catching covid the comic will restart when I am not deadly sick!

Read TPoH from the start here.

Update here on the TPoH website!

Thank you all  for the kind and loving support! If you want to buy books of this comic YOU CAN! Volumes one and two AND THREE are now in stock and you can get even more books in the form of TPatJ and Unbecoming! Find them and more here in the TPoH Topatoco shop right here, or tell your friends about it! There are also always lots of my doodles to buy on nice stuff in my Society6 merch box too!

If you like TPoH and my other work and want to help keep a soul and body together monetarily, please consider supporting me on Patreon, even just one or two dollars a month helps!

[viperwhispered]

Too Hard

Woop part 2 of the trip inside Jamil's head. Part 1 here.

The next time Jamil caught sight of you on campus, his first instinct was to turn around on his heel.

What a stupid thought to have because of you.

Besides, that would only make him more conspicuous, not less.

So, when your eyes met his, Jamil gave you a short nod in greeting. He would’ve left it at that and kept on his way, had you not walked up to him.

“Hi Jamil! How’s it going?” you said with that impossibly disarming smile of yours.

Why was it so difficult to look at you like he normally would? You had no right to make him feel so stiff, so unnatural.

On autopilot, Jamil exchanged a few pleasantries with you - those lessons from his parents had been instilled too deep in him for him to falter too badly in a simple exchange such as this. Still, Jamil quickly excused himself by telling you he still had to find Kalim before his next class.

Jamil didn’t miss the way your smile faltered. Had you hoped to get something out of him?

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you two later, then.”

Something about that irked him, though Jamil did not allow himself to dwell on it further.

His heart really had no business still racing as it did when he walked away, unaware of the frown on his face.

Just act normal. That’s all he needed to do.

After all, he had no time for dwelling in silly fancies.

If Jamil had been acutely aware of you before, it only seemed to worsen now that he was making a conscious effort to not act any differently with you. In fact, the harder he tried to keep you out, the more you invaded his thoughts, unsettling him.

The most innocuous words from you looped in his mind, and even the simplest actions caught his eye. For goodness's sake, he’d found himself staring at you while you were queueing up in the cafeteria the other day, not even doing anything other than standing around and looking bored!

For once, Jamil found himself grateful for all his duties. At least they provided him with something else to occupy himself with.

After all, if he was busy enough, it was difficult to think about those bright eyes of yours, your sweet laugh, or the way you bit your lip while thinking.

Still, sometimes it felt like no matter which way he turned, you were there, ready to throw him off-kilter. Not like it was his fault that often the most convenient route to class intersected with your daily routines. Or that your face seemed to jump out from any crowd, catching his attention.

Which certainly did not help his basketball performance. Jamil certainly did not recall you having such an interest in sports before, yet suddenly you were always there, distracting him. What had changed?

Could you possibly-

Jamil scoffed to himself, forcing his thoughts back on track for the nth time that day.

He picked up the tray of food and started taking it to Kalim. After dinner, he’d need to help Kalim with his homework, there were some housewarden tasks that would need dealing with, not to mention the preparations for the next-

Jamil froze in his tracks.

The voice he heard was quiet, but it was unmistakably you.

Really, it should not have come as such a surprise to him. You had become a rather frequent visitor to Scarabia, and Kalim often invited you to stay for meals. In fact, Jamil had started planning the dorm’s meal prep with your tastes and dietary restrictions in mind, just in case.

Jamil rounded the corner with strange exhilaration, his heart fluttering needlessly.

Yet, his mood evaporated when he saw you.

Why did you stop talking and look so guilty as soon as you caught sight of Jamil?

Jamil knew that look you gave to Kalim, had used it himself a thousand times. The one telling Kalim to keep quiet about something.

What could there possibly be that you would be comfortable sharing with Kalim, but not with him? That would give Kalim reason to sit so close to you, a comforting hand on your shoulder?

Jamil's mind raced with possibilities, yet could not settle for any single explanation.

He’d have to ask Kalim about it later.

Jamil gave you a short, polite greeting, his eyes lingering on you in an attempt to read what you were hiding.

“If I’d known you were coming over, I would’ve prepared something for you to eat as well,” Jamil said, already thinking about which parts of the dorm’s dinner to spruce up for you.

“Oh, no need, just figured I’d pop by. I’ll get out of your hair soon enough,” you said, something sheepish about your expression.

As expected, Kalim asked you to stay and dine with them, and with just a bit more persuasion you agreed - though not before telling Jamil that he should join you too and have himself a breather.

And since Kalim agreed with you, Jamil soon found himself sharing a meal with you and Kalim. Yet, even as he sat down with the food, his mind raced.

Had you been getting particularly close to Kalim lately? But surely Jamil would’ve noticed such a thing. Maybe someone from the dorm had been giving you trouble? But if that was the case, then surely you could let Jamil know about it, too. Unless for some reason you did not want to? But if it was something that concerned Kalim, then sooner or later it was bound to concern Jamil, too.

All the while, Kalim was talking to you about this and that, the latest topic being the animals kept on the Asim estate.

“I’ve got some pictures, let me show you!” Kalim said with an excited grin.

Only, a thorough patting of his pockets and a look around confirmed that Kalim’s phone was nowhere to be seen.

Jamil pinched the bridge of his nose. Where had Kalim left it this time?

Before Jamil even had the chance to say that he would handle it, Kalim sprinted off. Jamil hesitated for a moment, automatically halfway up from his seat, before he decided that leaving a guest unattended would be a worse offense than not helping out his master.

Jamil slumped back down with a sigh, mentally tracing the path Kalim took today, trying to recall the last time he saw Kalim handle his phone.

“Breathe. He’ll manage,” you said. There was the faintest of smiles on your lips, and Jamil could not decide if it was knowing or amused. Perhaps both.

Somehow, despite his frustration, Jamil’s own lips wanted to curl up too.

“Hmm. Maybe he will.”

Sure, Jamil could’ve called Kalim’s phone, to make it easier to find, but it was not that urgent, was it?

Jamil took another bite of his food, keeping an eye on you from the corner of his eye.

How was his mind so empty and so buzzing at the same time?

“You know-”

“So-”

You looked at each other, both just as surprised that the other had spoken up at the same time.

Even your surprised look was so-

“You first,” Jamil said. The way you bit your lip... Jamil had to raise a cup to his lips, slowly sipping his drink.

“Just… Feels like it’s been quite a while since I’ve seen you be still, you know. Or exchanged more than two words with you,” you said. You were attempting a light, joking tone, yet it was quite clear there was more to it.

“You say that like it would be unusual for me to be busy.”

He was not prepared for the way your soft sigh tugged at his heartstrings.

“No. It is not.”

You were both quiet after, poking at your meals. Normally, Jamil would’ve cherished such a moment of peace, yet this particular silence between you two was decidedly awkward.

Where was your usual chatter? Why weren’t you looking at him like you usually did?

“If you’re worried about me, don’t. I’m fine,” Jamil said, some softness creeping into his tone despite his best intentions.

“That's what Kalim said too,” you said. Yet the way you looked at Jamil made it clear you were still skeptical.

Wait.

Had you clammed up earlier because it had been Jamil you had been talking about with Kalim? That Kalim had comforted you about?

The thought twisted his stomach into knots.

Hasdhfsdf the way I fought with that last scene I swear. I don't even want to know how many versions I went through, trying to figure out how to say what I wanted without rubbing it into your face or making it too veiled. The joys of trying to convey things through a limited pov. Hopefully it came out reasonably balanced in the end. Rip to all those sentences that were lovely on their own but didn’t work for the whole. Hopefully I can rehome y’all one day. I do have thoughts for part 3 and part x (might be some chapters between those two as well, who knows at this point), so maybe we'll see those at some point, too. Tag list: @colliope @crystallizsch @diodellet @jamilsimpno69 @jamilvapologist @twstgo If you'd like to be tagged for future works, let me know! (Just be aware that sometimes I do also write nsfw, though you can certainly ask to be tagged only for particular kinds of works.)

[murdockiplier]

community characters as jellyfish (this is purely based on looks because i can't find any videos on jellyfish behaviors)

abed nadir - west african stinging nettle jellyfish

reason: favourite jellyfish, favourite character, plus look at them side by side, they're the same !!

troy barnes: moon jelly

reason: my 2nd favourite jellyfish and 2nd favourite character, but very close to abed and his jellyfish. also they are the same thing fr !!!

annie edison: mushroom cap jelly

reason: frilly and cute but passive aggressive

britta perry: white spotted jellyfish

reason: this one was purely off of vibes

jeff winger: pink meanie jellyfish

reason: he looks fine, inviting almost but he has deadly defenses to keep things at a distance

[nicktoons-brainrot]

GUYS ITS FINALLY HERE! THE IMPLOSION!

I got to make a lovely piece of art, and here is the fic to match, by @q-gorgeous ! It's called "Holey Moly" lol :3

This is also my first time with gore pieces! it was fun experimenting with it, although it did end up covered up by glowing green ectoplasm so.

ANYWAY I SO WANNA DO THIS NEXT YEAR

[spinjitsuburst]

ramble about ur favs i wanna hear abt ur thoughts -zaptrap

HAN’S INFODUMPING ABOUT JAY... START!!!!

so like sgdkdhdkdhd I say Jay and Lloyd are my “favorites” but honestly it’s so hard to pick favorites out of this skittles squad like I love EVERY character for a variety of different reasons. I was going to also infodump about Lloyd but then I started talking about Prime Empire and then this post got. Long. So. it's just Jay I may infodump about Lloyd another day especially since I'm very Conduit Brained Rn but yea yea!

this is long so i'm putting most of it under the cut so y'all don't kill me for making a huge long post

I considered putting Zane and Sora on here as well since I’d also consider them my “favs” but like this is already gonna be. A lot of. Infodumping (also i typed THIS part before I even started and decided not to yell about Lloyd because this already got long enough). Maybe I’ll make a separate post for those two hmm hmm much to consider but for now MY (technically) FAVORITE NINJAGO CHARACTER: JAY WALKER

THE SPARKPLUG WHO INVADED MY BRAIN LIKE A PARASITE

so hey his name is a pun this makes me laugh ridiculously hard every time I remember he is named. After a misdemeanor HSKSHDKFH

Jay is such an interesting case of a character for me because I started out the show not liking him. Which is. Stares at my entire account I think my feelings have changed somewhat

Jay starts out as an asshole I don’t think anyone can disagree with me there (although honestly they’re all assholes in early ninjago they bullied a ten year old and left him dangling several feet off the ground) but over the course of the show you can see him start developing into a much more interesting character. He goes from being so insecure he's faking everything about himself to someone who knows who he is and is so genuine about it

now yea we could argue about whether his character was too uwu-ified post-season 10 but this is the FUN HAN POST SO WE'RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT THAT the point is you can SEE the growth that Jay has gone through and I am going to show you that growth through what I call

✨ The Skybound to Prime Empire Effect ✨

I AM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT THE IDEA THAT PRIME EMPIRE WAS WRITTEN TO BE A DIRECT PARALLEL OF SKYBOUND AND WAS CENTERED ON SHOWING HOW THE NINJA ESPECIALLY JAY HAVE GROWN THROUGHOUT THE SEASON

when season 12 rolls around we are at the point in Jay's development where he is CONFIDENT in who he is. He's a fun-loving jokester with the power of lightning and the drive to help people whenever he can. He uses jokes and humor to help alleviate tension and get people through whatever's happening. And when on his own what does he do?

BECOME AN ENTERTAINER BABEY

i like to think jay's club in prime empire was a safe haven for anyone stuck in the game who figured out hey. we Can't Leave and felt freaked about it. Also Jay would generally try and spread the word that hey something ISN'T RIGHT HERE which would lead people to want to stay with him

(totally plugging my friend's fic but this kind of thing is explored in would you like to enter prime empire by @finn-m-corvex y'all should check it out cool cool)

also the prime empire shorts which i watched all of in the midst of typing this video cuz i love them go watch them please please please jay was publically fighting the red visors which I imagine may have raised some red flags for some players

THIS SOMEHOW TURNED INTO PRIME EMPIRE INFODUMPING LMAO ANYWAYS Jay's confident! He becomes an entertainer because it's who he knows he is! And it's something that will get people hyped and having fun, which is very in-character for Jay to do! He uses those kinds of things to mask the Bad Things going on and get people remembering what's good

I've talked about this sort of thing before but that's Jay's whole philosophy as early as season 9! Which is a DIRECT contrast to how he views it in season 6, as Nadakhan puts it scarily accurately

"You make jokes to mask the fact that you're afraid"

(i was gonna grab a screenshot for that like i did with the hunted scene but netflix has bloCKED THE ABILITY TO TAKE SCREENSHOTS THE WAY I USED TO and i don't have them already and i'm too lazy to grab them from elsewhere so alas trust me he says it)

making jokes to hide your fear and using humor to remind yourself of what's good and coping with the bad are two VERY different outlooks on it

so I think this outlook is what drives him to make this glamrock persona in the first place - this is a bad situation, one he's in with other civilians, and what better way to keep him and themself safe until the others get there than throwing a big performance at a safe place!

also it's just so gender okay I want to look like Superstar Rockin' Jay so badly

it's also interesting to see his outlook on his parents change over time! In season six he finds out Ed and Edna aren't his birth parents and feels upset about it, not understanding why his birth parents would've abandoned him. In season twelve, that outlook changing is EXACTLY why Jay's able to get through to Unagami

"I was abandoned by my parents, too!... I never understood why, and I never had the chance to even ask. But I always hoped there was a good reason. What if there's a reason?"

(again curse you netflix i wanted SCREENSHOTS whatever whatever)

It's this scene that gets Unagami to calm down long enough for Milton Dyer to get there, and presumably is what stops him from just. Flattening him and Jay like a pancake.

to piggyback off of this i absolutely adore how Unagami and Jay consider each other adopted brothers in that one book I still haven't read and I hope he's in Dragons Rising at some point Unagami is my favorite "villain" (no longer a villain) in the whole show he deserves more screentime

like this is where i found out about this and it's plagued my mind ever since. i need to read. this book just for them

SO YEA OKAY Prime Empire is "Who is Jay as a Person Post-Skybound" to me also it opens up so many fascinating things about Jay. I rest my case

so backpedaling a little bit. JAY CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HIS PARENTS GUYS IT'S SO SOFT AND I'M sobs

like yea the first episode with Ed and Edna in it has Jay avoiding them like the plague but this gets explained very easily when you remember he was bullied for his home life before he became a ninja. It makes a lot more sense why he wouldn't want them around his new friends, assuming they'd react the same way. Also how was he supposed to know literally all the rest of the groups parents were either dead, presumed dead, or had a toxic relationship with their kid lmao

(Cole calling his mom kills me. Cole's mom is dead. I know they probably just didn't think that far ahead when writing the dialogue but it's so funny mans pretended to call his dead mom to get on Jay for not appreciating his parents iconic behavior)

anyways literally every episode Ed and Edna are central to (except like the one in skybound) Jay stops at nothing to protect his parents and it means the absolute world to me he's so much like them!! They raised an inventive little nerd and he will stop at nothing to make sure they're safe and it's. It's SO IMPORTANT TO ME OKAY

ALSO this is an excuse to clip my favorite piece of dialogue possibly in the entire show. Except Netflix won't let me now. So you just get the text dialogue

Jay's just fallen from the sky with a messed up eye and is incredibly distraught that all his friends are captured. And his dad just. The woRLD IS FALLING APART AND HE'S EATIN' SOUP-

Ed i love you

anyways

anways anyways this just turned into me rambling about prime empire and then Ed and Edna and a lot of disjointed other stuff but thank you for this opportunity i was going to also ramble about lloyd but i put this post in a word count and

yea i think that's enough for a tumblr post anyways! If anyone wants any like. More logically thought out and direct thoughts about characters feel free to send me asks this was fun thank u @zaptrap for this opportunity to scream about jay

[myrkkymato]

Inspired by Sevika comforting the reader after a nightmare by @archangeldyke-all

[flashhwing]

okay actually i am curious about something so i'm going to redo the trans swag poll with only characters who are not canonically trans. i need you all to live in the headcanon space with me. if you pick "other" and then put ashton or molly in the tags you are missing the point and should vote in this poll instead

once again disclaimer this is based on my own criteria in my head that i will not tell u, if ur fave (non canonically) trans swag character isn't on here tell me in the tags! i wanna hear about ur headcanons they're fun

[qtepasacalabaza]

if things keep going on like this he's just gonna become one of my oc's lol

also the joke basically is that Dean ask Cas if he looks fat and Cas says there is no need to worry about human beauty standards and that his value as a person is not defined by his body; while at the same time Cas thinks that his dick is the one that gets fat every time he sees Dean (I swear it's funnier in Spanish😭😭)

[useramor]

i got all my sisters with me rated: T | word count: 6.7k

for @eddiediass since dev inspired this whole thing <3 i hope you like it!

Soph to Eddie Hate Club: Hey guys! This is Alex, Sophia’s been a little out of it since Nina was born (she’s doing great, just in some pain and y’all know how weirdly woozy she gets on medicine). Combine that with a lack of sleep, and…well Y’all get it. Anyway, Soph and I wanted to host you guys next weekend.

Adriana to Eddie Hate Club: YES I’m packing my bags right now

Eddie to Eddie Hate Club: Are Buck and Chris invited?

Soph to Eddie Hate Club: I will take any excuse to see that man up close and personal “Hey, Buck?”

“Hmm.”

“What do you say about a trip to Texas?”

(or, eddie's sister has a baby, buck meets the diaz girls, and they're sickeningly in love for six thousand words)

read on ao3

[atwas-gaming]

"Amy's just an obsessive fangirl," then explain her reaction to Sonic in Unleashed? Most fans and paparazzi and whatnot ditch their favorite for a new favorite the second their favorite turns weird or ugly. But Amy still loves werehog Sonic as much as daytime Sonic. Once she understands, she's like, "Oh, this is who you are now. Cool. I hope you're all right. Now when can we have a date?"

Granted, she doesn't necessarily have her priorities in order there, but she still cares about him. She just got confused when she first saw him. I saw a translation of her Japanese dialogue one time, and she said something like, "But I know I felt Sonic's presence." As soon as Amy finds out it really is Sonic, she's by his side again. As far as any of them knows, Sonic could be like this the rest of his life, and she doesn't care, as long as she can be with him.

[nonndrawz]

GUYS!!! THE CYCLOPS IN THE GOW: RAGNARÖK VALHALLA DLC TRAILER LOOKS VERY SIMILAR TO THE CYCLOPS FROM GOW 3!!! LOOK AT THEIR MODELS!!! THEY BOTH USE A TREE STUMP AS A WEAPON!!! THEY BOTH HAVE A METAL BRACELET ON THEIR LEFT ARM!!! THEY BOTH WEAR SANDALS!!! THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS THE COLOR OF THEIR LOINCLOTH!!! PLUS IT MAKES SENSE THAT THIS CYCLOPS WOULD LOOK LIKE ONE KRATOS HAS KILLED, SINCE WE ARE FACING HIS PAST!!! LET ME COOOKKK!!!

[themirokai]

It is with very mixed emotions that I present to you

Grave

The final story in the Matthew the Emotional Support Raven series.

Matthew visits his own grave and finds himself in need of some emotional support.

Thanks to @quillsorceress for giving this a read and @aquilathefighter and @kulapti for being my go-to bird experts and answering a totally necessary and vital question about raven anatomy.

Inspiration from this picture. If you follow me you've seen a bunch of @raven-photos 's raven photos under my corvid posting tag, but you should follow them too because they post tons of lovely stuff.

You can read the whole story below the cut or over on AO3. The AO3 version includes a mushy authors note about this being the end of the series, which I won't duplicate here, but I may put some additional thoughts in a reblog later.

~~~

Matthew felt the air pressure in the cemetery change. He hung his head with a sigh. 

“Did you need something, Boss?”

“I need only to know that my Raven is well,” Lord Morpheus said from behind him. 

“Yeah, you know me,” Matthew said. “Ball of corvid sunshine.” 

“Matthew.”

“I haven’t even been gone that long,” Matthew groused. 

No response to that. Matthew sighed again and looked around at the gray headstones and dewy grass, sparkling in the morning light. 

“How did you find me? You’re not in my head.” He thought for a moment. “Lucienne ratted me out, didn’t she?” 

“Lucienne informed me that you had asked for your book. She was concerned for your mental state.” 

Matthew huffed. “Do dreams have ‘mental states’?” 

“Yes,” Lord Morpheus said simply. 

Matthew hung his head again and took a deep breath, then reflected that he wasn’t alive and probably didn’t need to breathe. Which was what had brought him to this cemetery in the first place. He gestured to the headstone in front of him with his wing. “Well, there it is. In all its glory. My grave.”

There was, in fact, no glory. It was a completely unremarkable gray headstone with a curved top. His name and the dates of his birth and death were carved on it, nothing else.

“Why have you come here, Matthew?” Lord Morpheus asked quietly. 

“You don’t know? You can’t just read my mind?” 

“Not while we are in the Waking.” 

“Inconvenient,” Matthew muttered. He ground his beak. Matthew knew that none of this was the boss’s fault. He had made perfectly clear when Matthew first met him that he hadn’t been the one to turn Matthew into a Raven. Matthew shook his head. “I died a year ago.” He turned to face Lord Morpheus. The boss was standing ramrod straight, hands shoved into the pockets of a black pea coat. 

“This is not the anniversary of your death, Matthew.”

Matthew flapped his wings. “I know that. I just… started thinking about it. And then I realized that for all the times I’ve come to the Waking, I never saw what my grave looked like.” 

“Now you see it.” 

“Yeah, and I’m dead in there!” He turned to stare at the ground in front of the headstone. “Like my body - my body that I had my whole life - is just down there. Dead and rotting.” He shivered. “It’s not like I ever took particularly good care of it, but it’s still weird! And that’s before you even get to the fact that I’m a fucking bird.” 

“I thought you enjoyed being a Raven.” 

“I do!” Matthew said quickly. “This isn’t about that. It’s just… look, one minute I’m an alive human and the next minute I’m a fucking bird and  Lucienne is telling me to go follow you and then I’m trying to get you to not throw me out on my ear and then we’re dealing with Constantine and then we’re going to Hell and then you’re fighting the asshole who had your ruby and then I’m spying on Rose and then I’m running errands and delivering messages and meeting all sorts of weird people and- and beings and then…” Matthew breathed out in a rush. “I don’t know. I guess I never really stopped to think about the fact that I’m dead. Like really properly dead. With my body rotting in the ground.” 

“Do you feel ‘really properly dead’?”

“No! I don’t feel properly anything! That’s the problem!” 

Lord Morpheus kind of folded himself up so that he was sitting cross-legged on the ground, facing Matthew. “You were not expecting to die? When you were human.” 

Matthew closed his eyes and shook his head. “I wasn’t that old. And I didn’t exactly have the greatest lifestyle… certainly not what would be considered ‘clean living’ by any stretch. I guess that’s why I had a heart attack… but no. I wasn’t sick or anything. I wasn’t expecting to die.” 

Lord Morpheus nodded solemnly. “Most of my past Ravens had been ill or injured or old when they died. Their deaths were much less surprising than yours. And they joined me during… much less chaotic times, when I… shaped the process of them becoming dreams myself.” 

Matthew snorted. “Yeah, I know. I’m the unwanted Raven. You don’t have to remind me.” 

“You mistake me, Matthew.” Lord Morpheus frowned. “Deliberately, I think.” 

“No, I just… you know what I mean.” Matthew looked away from him. 

“As I stated,” Lord Morpheus said a bit huffily, “in the Waking I cannot see your thoughts.” They were both quiet for a moment before Lord Morpheus continued. “My intent in bringing up other Ravens was to comfort you with the notion that the… discomfort you are experiencing is understandable, since your transformation to Raven occurred under less than ideal circumstances.” 

Matthew tipped his head to the side, looking up at him. “How did I become a Raven if you didn’t make me one?” 

A tiny smile on Lord Morpheus’s lips. “Another indication of the frenetic pace of your first year is that we have never talked of this.” He shifted into what Matthew considered to be his ‘storyteller voice’. It was a little deeper, more hypnotic. “I confess that I do not know for sure, though I have my suspicions.” 

Matthew would have liked to stay silent but felt an inexorable pressure to ask, “What suspicions?” Must have been the force of the narrative or something. 

He was rewarded with another tiny smile. 

“It is my suspicion that my sister, Death, selected you… for me.” 

Matthew would have frowned if he had lips. “How were your other Ravens selected?” 

“The souls of those who die in their sleep linger in the Dreaming until my sister collects them and passes them to whatever afterlife awaits them. When the time comes for me to select a new Raven, I select a soul that… feels right, and begin the transformation process.”

“What if the person doesn’t want to be a Raven?” 

It was Lord Morpheus’s turn to frown. “Do you not wish to be a Raven, Matthew?” 

Matthew clicked his tongue. “Now who’s mistaking who?” 

Lord Morpheus inclined his head. “If the person does not wish to be a Raven, then it will not last. They will move on to whatever is next for them and I will select a new Raven.” 

Matthew considered that, but quickly decided that he didn’t want to think too much about whatever was next. “So Death picked me.” 

“Yes, I believe so. It is possible that once I had returned to the Dreaming it… automatically selected a random soul and performed the process without my guidance…” 

Matthew knew there was more to that sentence. “But?” 

Lord Morpheus looked at the headstone. “But. You are too well-chosen to have been a chance selection… and.” 

“And?” 

“Even if the pain of Jessamy’s murder had not convinced me that I did not want another Raven, I think it unlikely that I would have chosen you.” 

Matthew glared at him. “I know that the next thing out of your mouth is going to make that a less shitty thing to hear.” 

Lord Morpheus rolled his eyes. “You are well aware how this story ends, Matthew. I would not have chosen you but sometimes my sister knows me better than I know myself. She collected you when I was preoccupied with the Hecate and saw what I would not have seen: that you… were exactly who I needed as my Raven. And then I suspect that she gave the Dreaming a very strong suggestion to perform your transformation.” 

Matthew had Death to thank for his current gig. Just add that to the pile of things he didn’t know how to feel about. But. There was the rest of what the boss had said. 

Matthew dragged a talon through the grass. “So… you don’t wish you had a different Raven? Someone… I dunno. Dignified or clever or something.” 

Lord Morpheus drew himself up and his eyes blackened from their normal Waking world blue to the night sky. “I am Dream of the Endless. I am older than this universe. I suspect I possess enough dignity for us both.” 

Matthew was not entirely sure that age and dignity were that closely related but kept quiet as Lord Morpheus continued. 

“As far as cleverness… you are perhaps not familiar with great works of poetry or philosophy, but I have never had a Raven who was more skilled at putting others at their ease, or soothing wounded feelings. Anything you lack in courtly manners is more than made up for in kindness and sincerity.” Lord Morpheus sighed and shook his head. “I would not have chosen you, Matthew, but I would have been a fool. You are exactly who I need as my Raven, especially after my imprisonment. My sister saw that, and I am immensely grateful to her.” He held out his hand. Matthew stepped on and was brought into his embrace. “I am sorry that your death was unexpected and jarring for you, Matthew. And I am sorry that the beginning of your tenure as my Raven has been so chaotic. But I cannot bring myself to be sorry that you died when you did, because that timing brought you to me.”

“Oh, Boss,” Matthew sighed.  

“So yes, your human body is moldering in that grave. And yes, you are a ‘fucking bird’. But I very much hope that you will remain a ‘fucking bird’ for a very long time to come.” 

Ravens, Matthew learned, were not capable of crying. He pressed his head against Lord Morpheus’s chest as Lord Morpheus began stroking his feathers. “Yeah. That sounds good.”