#hopefully its a bit juicy

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Morgana AU Pt 4

Sarrum isn't invading. That much is clear when they begin to pass Camelot soldiers on the road near the city, and not one of them gives the host or their captives a second glance.

Within the city walls at least, stares and whispers follow them, as shocked citizens watch them paraded through the city streets in chains. Gwen remains silent through it all, seeming to retreat into herself as they near the palace.

They seem to be expected, and though Sarrum and his lieutenants split off to enter the main gate of the palace while the captives are funneled through the servants entrance, their destination is the same-- the main hall, where a pair of great wooden doors swing open to admit them all.

"Your Majesty!" Sarrum bellows amiably, lifting both arms in greeting. "An honor and a privilege to be a guest of Camelot once more."

Kara surveys the court, specifically the dais on which the king sits. His throne is relatively modest, and his knights are stationed around the room on high alert. Just behind the throne, however, stands a beanpole of a young man with dark hair, chin ducked as though guilty of a heinous secret.

In an instant, Kara knows this is Merlin.

She's heard of the boy, the servant who'd poisoned Morgana with a waterskin. She remembers Morgana's soft words to Gwen shortly before they all left the hut behind.

"I died, Gwen," she'd murmured beside the fire, while Kara had been outside fetching more wood.

Gwen's shock had been palpable in the silence that followed, before she tucks away what are undoubtedly countless questions to focus on the one thing that matters.

"But you came back."

Morgana sighed then. "Perhaps."

Whether Morgana had ever shared the identity of her murderer with Gwen, Kara doesn't know, but in this moment what she does know is that Morgana's two greatest enemies stand in this hall.

The king-- Arthur-- rises from his seat. His knights shift in readiness.

"What is the meaning of this?"

Arthur's voice is calm and measured, but Kara hears the hint of a threat. Likely, a parade of dirty captives into his throne room isn't an often occurence.

"A gift for your majesty," Sarrum announces with pride. "And for the jewel upon the crown--!"

Sarrum throws his arm back towards the great doors, and the crowd of his men parts to admit one of their own tugging on a chain. At the end of it is Morgana, hands and neck locked into a set of narrow wooden stocks, eyes glassy with fever.

If Kara could break her chains she would, but instead she simply holds her breath, relieved that her friend is alive. Her eyes flick towards the dais, and is surprised to see the king's shock mingle with a mix of concern and outrage.

The soldier hands the chain to Sarrum once within reach, who immediately gives the leash a rough pull, jerking Morgana off her feet. She lands hard on her knees with a crack that echoes in the great hall, and is given no time to recover before Sarrum grabs her by the hair to wrench her head back.

"The lady witch herself!" he announces.

Morgana grunts, breathing heavily against the pain and fever, but says nothing.

"Morgana..."

Clearly dumbfounded, Arthur stares at the prize offered to him. His jaw works soundlessly, unable to speak.

Someone does it for him.

"End this, Arthur!"

Gwen pushes past Kara to stand in the open, as far as her chains allow. At the sight of her, Arthur goes pale.

"Gwen?"

A cascade of whispers ripples across the assembled nobles.

"End this," she says again, urging her husband to listen. "Please. It isn't right--"

"Silence!"

A guard steps forward to strike her, but halts when a blade touches his neck from behind. Gwen straightens from her reactive flinch, and relaxes at the sight of her brother holding the hilt.

"Elyan..."

"It's good to see you," he says with a soft smile. Gwen nods, and returns her attention to Arthur.

"Let her go, Arthur."

At that, Merlin steps out from behind the throne to murmur in the king's ear. "Use caution, your Majesty. She is no friend to Camelot."

Kara's hands tighten into fists. Gwen, too, bristles. "People can change," she points out sharply. "Clearly, if you have come to treat with a man as cruel as Sarrum."

Arthur's jaw tightens, but to his credit doesn't otherwise react to the barb. Kara watches as he considers his option, waiting for his decision.

Finally, he looks to Sarrum.

"Release them."

Gwen releases a breath, even as Sarrum sputters in protest. "But your Majesty--!"

"I said release them!" Arthur presses, tone sharpening to a deadly edge. "All of them."

Sarrum hesitates, as though debating whether to defy the order. In the end, he motions sharply to his men, and in moments the captives are released from their irons. Kara and Gwen rush to Morgana's side as the stocks are removed from her neck, and she slumps forward into Gwen's arms.

Gwen cups Morgana's cheek and looks sharply to Kara in fear. "She's burning up!"

"The arrow--" Kara rips the fabric at Morgana's shoulder, and sure enough the shaft is still there, festering.

"Gaius!" Gwen calls. She looks around her sharply, pinning Arthur with a hard stare. "We need Gaius!"

Arthur swallows thickly, yet nods to his nearest man. "Percival."

"Arthur..." Merlin says in a low warning.

"She has done many terrible things," Arthur concedes, "but she is still my sister."

Kara watches as Percival-- a positively mountainous man-- tucks Morgana against his chest and lifts her into his arms. Morgana moans, eyes rolling back in effort to remain conscious.

Gwen and Kara follow Percival out of the throne room and through the castle, ignoring the stares from servants and vassals alike, up and up a winding staircase until bursting into what could only be a healer's chambers. A narrow cot is cleared of strewn clothes, and Morgana is laid upon it with as much care as Percival can manage. Still, it jostles the shaft in Morgana's shoulder and she groans in agony.

"Careful, careful," an elderly man urges, bustling towards them with rags and cutting implements. "Merlin--"

"Right," the boy says, moving obediently to undress Morgana's wound as though he hadn't just been advocating for her misery.

Kara intercepts him with a growl.

"Don't you touch her!" Her fists bury themselves in his shirt, arresting his movement. She releases him with a shove. "Don't you touch her."

"I'll do it," Gwen says urgently, already peeling away the blood-dried fabric to reveal the wound. "It pierced through as well."

"Then we have double the work to do," Gaius observes, his voice steady. "We shall do what we can--"

"No," Kara clips out, turning her glare from Merlin to Gaius. "You will do what you can. Not him."

"Very well," Gaius agrees. He gently moves Gwen to the other side of the cot, where she immediately moves to press a cold compress against Morgana's brow. The healer passes his gaze across the rest of them. "Clear the room."

"But--" Arthur begins to protest, but not even a king holds sway in a healer's domain.

"I require space to work, and fresh air to clear the lungs and cool the body. You may post a guard at the door if you must, but we must not be disturbed."

Arthur reticently nods, and motions to his men, tugging Merlin along with him. The boy glares balefully at Kara, who glares back in equal measure until the door swings shut behind the lot.

That Gwen and Kara both remain behind goes unremarked upon.

"Now, then," Gaius says, looking to his new assistant. Gwen glances up at him, features lined with worry. "It will not be pleasant, but we must work quickly."

Removing the arrow shaft releases a musk of pus and infection that quickly fills the room, the open windows hardly enough to help. The one blessing they have is that Morgana loses her battle to remain conscious, and goes limp before they can even begin to clean the wound and clear the infection.

"How long?" Gaius asks.

"Three days," Gwen returns. She provides what little information she can, but Kara remains quiet, arms folded as she stands watch against any who may enter. All the while, her gaze remains focused on Morgana, trying her hardest not to imagine Lena on that cot, Lena fighting for her life.

It's going to be okay, Kara thinks to herself.

It has to be.

[constantvariations]

Given how Adam's scar isn't stretched or distorted, he was probably branded as a late teen

[muffinpink02]

Cravings

Okay, this is my first little family/baby story. Its my first attempt at fluff and cute stuff, I hope it makes sense. Let me know what you think. I've already started another one so hopefully you like this.

Summary - You’re pregnant, married to Alexia. Your cravings get you a little emotional. Just little bits and pieces of your pregnancy and Alexia helping you every step.

Warnings - swearing

You stood on your tiptoes as you rummaged in your snack box, trying to look for your latest obsession.

“Babe! Where are those salted caramel chocolates we got? The gold packet ones?” You shouted for your wife as you scanned the cupboards. 

Being pregnant wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Yeah, your body had completely changed, and your mind had gotten foggy, and your emotions were hard to keep up with and you struggled to do simple things like put your shoes on. But, having Alexia as your wife made the whole experience worth it, the girl was a saint. 

When you were around 6 weeks pregnant you had suffered with some morning sickness, though thankfully it didn't last too long. When you were rushing to the bathroom at 4am, flopping to your knees, trying to get your vomit in the bowl on time, Alexia wouldn't be far behind you. She would always be by your side, rubbing your back as soon as she heard you jump out of the bed. 

“It's okay, amor. Here’s some water, clear your mouth.” 

You rinsed your mouth, washing the taste of acid from your tongue. She helped you back to bed, stroking your cheek until you fell asleep against her chest. She would always feel so bad for you, she hated watching you in any kind of pain.

Then came the cravings. At first it was anything sweet and juicy. You became obsessed with fruit, the berry family in particular. Blackberries, blueberries, raspberries if it had a ‘berry’ at the end of it you had to have it. And your most favourite berry was strawberries. You found yourself going through a pack of the sweet fruits every 2 days. 

Anything with the flavour of strawberry you had to have. Strawberry ice cream, strawberry jam, strawberry drinks, strawberry sweets, you even changed your lips gloss to strawberry. If it had a trace of strawberry then you had it in your mouth. Alexia joked that the baby was going to come out with red skin and green leaf’s for hair.

The fixation then progressed to strawberry milkshakes. You discovered the obsession when you and Alexia were out in town, you had both stopped to look at a display in the shop window. But your attention was caught by a whole other shop. Alexia hadn't even realised you had gone until she noticed she didn't get a response to her question.

“What do you think? ….Bebé?” 

The blonde looked to her side where you had just been standing, she only had to look a few shops down, when she caught you watching the milkshakes being made in the other window. She smiled as she walked over to you, eyeing your ever growing belly as it poked out under your t-shirt. 

“Want a milkshake, amor?” Alexia wrapped her arms around you, her warm body pressing into your own.

“Yeah, a strawberry one.” You smiled as you felt her kiss your cheek.

So, Alexia brought you a milkshake, asking for extra strawberries without you even having to ask.

The milkshake obsession then became something you wanted, no, needed everyday. 

So, in the mornings before training Alexia would make your strawberry milkshake alongside her protein shake. You didn't know how, but the girl would always make the fruity drink so much better than you ever could, no matter how hard you tried, hers always tasted sweeter.

As soon as you found out you were pregnant you stopped playing for Barca and went on maternity leave. And of course Alexia became super protective over you, though it wasn't a shock to you when she did, she was protective with you before you even became pregnant. 

Slowly you had to reduce your personal training as you got further along. Alexia watched you like a hawk when you wanted to do any kind of weight training, making sure you never did anything over 5kg. She would take regular walks with you and even joined your swimming classes, as they were deemed ‘safe’ enough for her. 

She insisted on carrying all the bags when you went grocery shopping, not letting you carry anything that could potentially ‘hurt’ you or the baby. Though you secretly loved the extra attention. Until Alexia wanted to build the baby cot alone, because she was scared you would hurt yourself with the hammer, and you had to put your foot down. 

Alexia was also amazing with her hands, and not just for other things. If you ever complained about a painful back or sore feet she would be on you in seconds, massaging your muscles until you couldn’t even remember the ache you had. She would run you baths, make your favourite dinners and always make sure you and the baby were getting your vitamins. 

She was simply the best, you saw a whole new side to her, you didn't think it was possible but it made you fall in love with her more everyday.

Anything you wanted to buy for the baby the Spaniard would look into the product, and study the reviews for hours, making sure it was good enough for the baby. If there was even one bad review from 3 years ago she would ask you to look for another one. “Just in case, amor.”

She of course brought every book you could read on pregnancy and child care, reading them at night before bed. Telling you all the tips and tricks it had for expecting mothers. You listened while you stared at your wife, her serious tone was on but you could only watch her beautiful features as she spoke, making you wonder what parts the baby would get from her. 

You hoped they got everything from her.

One afternoon you came back from a shopping outing with Ingrid. You both walked through your hallway, but was stopped in your tracks when you saw a new gate between the rooms, it was a baby gate. You looked at Ingrid who was already smiling, she knew what Alexia was like. 

“Ale, baby? What's this?” You called out.

The blonde skipped down the hall, a proud smile on her face. 

“It's for the baby, so it doesn't get into trouble.” She tapped the gate proudly, looking at the object like it was a brand new Bentley. 

“But the baby won't be walking for a long time. I don’t know if we need this yet.” You chuckled as she eyed the bars.

“No, no. It's better to be ready. We can get used to it before the baby comes.”

“She has a point.” Ingrid chimed in.

“Sí. Ingrid gets it.” The blonde nodded at the raven haired girl. 

“If it makes you happy, then I’m happy. Now, open it up so we can get through.” 

Alexia moved to open the gate, but it wouldn't open for her.

“Wait, I think it's this way.” The blonde frowned as she tried to pull the handle. But still, she couldn't open it. “Cosa estúpida.” 

“Let me try.” You dropped your bags and attempted to open the gates yourself, but you couldn't do it either. 

“Why won't it open?” You sighed in annoyance.

“No, pull it. Pull that bit up. Towards you.” Alexia tried to direct you.

“I am doing that!” 

And just before you were about to have a domestic, Ingrid silently leaned forward and with no fuss opened the gate like it was the most simplest thing to do. You both gapped at the Norwegian, wondering what kind of trick she used to open it.

“Do it again.” Alexia stared at the gate, wondering how on earth Ingrid was able to open it.

Luckily by the 50th try you both had learnt to finally open it. 

Alexia hated leaving you in the morning when she went to training. She would wake up 20 minutes early just to have extra cuddles with you, or talk to your belly. Your heart would melt when she spoke to the ever growing bump. She had felt silly when she first started doing it, talking to a belly with a small human inside felt weird, but she slowly got used to it.

It actually became something she looked forward to, you would read or scroll on your phone as the blonde shared the events of her day with the bump, she even did it when you were fast asleep, having her own private conversation with the little human. And of course she spoke it in her mother tongue, there was no chance that baby wasn’t going to learn Catalan. 

One afternoon when you were five months pregnant she was talking to the bump, her face resting gently against the side of your stomach, stroking your skin. She promised the ‘Berry’ (as she liked to call it), that she was going to take them to all the Barcelona games and how she was going to train the baby to be a midfielder or striker, and definitely not a defender. 

You chuckled at her words. Earlier that day you had visited Alexia at training. All the girls excitedly greeted you, everyone wanted to feel your stomach, and you gladly let them, you had missed them all so much. 

“Sí, that's a defender in there, I can tell.” Mapi said confidently, smiling at you. 

“No, it's going to be a goalie.” Cata insisted.

You laughed as you watched Alexia’s face drop, the group then all started arguing about what position the baby would play, Alexia had sulked on the way home, but you only laughed at her pout. You were suddenly pulled from your memories. 

You both felt it. Alexia jumped away from you in an instant.

“Oh, Déu meu. Did you feel that?” She looked at you with wide eyes.

“Yes! It kicked!” You gasped as you touched the spot.

“Like a footballer! Berry has a strong kick!” She touched your belly in awe, staring at the bump. Then came another kick. The blonde gasped as you both felt the little life  wiggling inside you.

“That's definitely a striker in there.” She smiled playfully.

You rolled your eyes at the big child in front of you. 

“I love you, amor.” Her large hands cradled your bump, she looked at you with so much love it almost overwhelmed you. 

“I love you too, baby.” You whispered. 

You watched as she kissed your bump, you stroked her hair out of her face as her smile grew. You felt your own eyes water at the beautiful women in front of you. You couldn't believe that this was your life, you felt so lucky that she was the mother of your child.

By 6 months your cravings changed to everything salty. Peanuts, chips, crisps, pretzels, salty popcorn, you name it you had it. You added salt to nearly every one of your meals. Alexia had to conversacate the condiment out of fear of your obsession. 

Now you are 8 and a half months pregnant. You only had 2 weeks to go before the baby was set to arrive. So, now it was just a waiting game.  A long, uncomfortable waiting game.

“What ones?” Alexia walked into the kitchen. 

You looked through your snack cupboard, trying to find the chocolate you had become obsessed with. Your two cravings of sweet and salty had combined and got you into your new favourite obsession of salted caramel chocolate. 

“The ones we got the other day, I’m sure I bought 3 packets.” 

“You finished them, don't you remember? I even warned you that you didn't have any left after that.” She chuckled as she stroked your neck.

You felt your eyes prickle with heat, your tears making your eyes glassy. Of course you knew this wasn't a normal way to react just because you didn't have the chocolates you craved, but you were hormonal, and tired and everything hurt and your back was killing you and your feet were sore and the TV in the background was too loud.

“Oh.” Your voice cracked.

Alexia's eyes widened in panic. “What's wrong, bebita? Are you okay?”

You sniffed, you tried to hide your face as you felt the tears prick your eyes. God, you felt stupid. Crying over a chocolate bar. You felt Alexia’s hand travel to your back, stroking you with the softest touch. 

“Y-yeah, yeah. Sorry, I just really wanted th-” You couldn't finish your sentence as the hormonal dam broke. 

Alexia really panicked then. “Bebé. Shhh it's okay, don't cry. I can get you more.” She pulled you into her chest. “I’ll go get you a crate of them, please don't cry.”

You sobbed into her chest, you couldn't believe you were crying over this, you knew it was just your hormones, but you couldn't control it.

“I’m sorry Ale, I’m just… it's just everything hurts. I can’t get comfortable in any position. I’m hot then I'm cold. My bodies changed so much. I can’t even see my feet anymore! My boobs are killing me. I hate the smell of my favourite perfume and now I’m crying over fucking chocolate.” 

“Hey, shh it's okay. You don’t have to explain yourself. I’m sorry, bebé. Let me get your chocolate, and whatever else you want, we can get a take out tonight or I can cook your favourite meal. Does that sound good?” The blonde kissed your forehead. 

You nodded in her chest, you felt like a sulky child. At least you knew Alexia would be prepared when your child would have their tantrums, or she would just give in and give them chocolate.

“Good. Come sit down. I’ll run you a bath.” 

The blonde ran you a bath with your favourite bath soaks. The bubbles were nearly flowing out over the sides once she was happy with it. She helped you into the warm tub, stroking your hair back as you settled.

“Okay. I won't be long. Be careful when you get out okay.” 

You rolled your eyes and smiled. “I will Ale, thank you for this.” 

“Got to look after my babies.” She kissed your head and winked at you.

She closed the door and made her way to the shops for your chocolate.

You sunk into the hot bath, breathing in the sweet coconut bath milk that Alexia used. You already felt better, Alexia always knew what to do to make you feel at ease. She was always calm around you even when she wanted to panic. 

You laid for another 20 minutes soaking your muscles. You carefully made your way out of the bath, wrapping your fluffy towel around you. 

You began to get your joggers on when you felt a shooting pain, you grabbed your belly on the sharp twinge. Then another one came, but it was a lot less painful then the first. You took in a deep breath as you put on your t-shirt. 

Your doctor told you that you might potentially get pains closer to the due date. So you tried not to overthink it. You looked at your phone, Alexia should have been home by now. That's when you saw her texts.

Alexia - They don’t have the chocolates in the store, going to another one xx 

Alexia - They don’t have it in that one either, I’ll go to Summers.

Summers was over a half hour's drive, you didn't want Alexia to drive so far for a chocolate bar. You called her phone, she answered by the first ring.

“Hola baby, you okay?”

“Ale, you don't have to drive to Summers, it's too far.”

“I’m 5 minutes away now, it’s fine, amor. I know you want this. I know you would do it for me.”

You smiled. “Yeah, okay, well thank you, you’re the best.”

“I know.” You could hear the smile in her tone.

You rolled your eyes playfully. “Let's hope the baby gets your humble characteristics.”

The blonde laughed down the phone. “I hope Berry is every piece of you.”

You felt your heart melt at her words. The girl really knew how to make you melt.

“I’ll see you in a bit.” 

“Sí, i'll see you soon.” 

You hung up the phone and made your way to the sofa, trying to find something you could watch without ruining anything you and Alexia watched together. But as you clicked through the options you jumped with a flash of pain.

“Fuck!” 

The pain came again, quicker and longer. You panted as you felt the twinge trickle into your back, causing you to drop you to your knees, you gritted your teeth as the throbbing ache swept down to the bottom of your stomach.

“Owwwww! Shit!” You cried out.

You still had 2 weeks till your due date, surely this wasn't labour? It was just the pain the doctor told you about. Braxton hicks, that's what it was. You grabbed your phone, you tried to call Alexia but she didn't answer, because she was out getting your stupid chocolates! 

Then you called Ingrid. Your best friend. Her and Mapi only lived a 2 minute walk from you. Maybe they could drive you to the hospital. The line rang, Ingrid picked up after the third ring.

“Hello, sweet pea.” She sang down the phone.

“Hey, do you think- fuck!” 

Another sharp pain stabbed through your body.

“Are you okay?” Ingrid asked, panic in her voice. 

“Yeah, well, no. I’m in pain, I don’t really know what to do. Alexias half way across town and-”

“I’m coming over.” 

“Thank you, Ingrid. Sorry I don’t want to be a nuisance- oh my g-” You groaned as another sharp pain hit you.

“Mapi, get your shoes on. Stay on the phone, we’re coming now.”

“Okay.” You breathed out.

You put the phone on speaker as you cradled your belly. You could hear Mapi���s confused voice in the background. You pushed the whispers of hair out of your face as you felt your body start to heat up from the pain. Why did this have to happen now? 

The girls must have sprinted to yours as they were at your door just over a minute later. Ingrid let herself in with her spare key. You heard their feet as they rushed through your hallway.

“I’m in here gu- uys! Owww!” You groaned.

You felt Ingrid kneel beside you. Her hand instantly rubbing your back.

“How long have you had the pain?”

“Maybe 10 minutes.” You sighed.

“Do you think you're in labour?”

“No, the doctor said this would happen. I’m not due for another-”

Your sentence was cut short as you felt a stream of water coming from between your legs. You waters broke.

“No, no, no, no, please! Fuck. Not now!” 

“Ay dios mío!” Map shouted from the door. “We need to get her to a hospital!”

“Mapi, calm down.” Ingrid's tone was low.

The raven haired girl turned back to you, her face was calm but firm.

“Can you walk?” 

“Y-yeah, I think so.” 

“Okay, I’ll help you. Come.” 

Your best friend slid her arm under your own, helping you to your feet. 

“Okay good. Breath. Mapi, call Alexia.” 

Mapi stared at you with wide eyes, she looked more scared than you, to be honest she probably was. She hadn't even heard Ingrid’s instructions, her whole body stood still, frozen with fear. 

“Maria! Come on. Call Alexia.” Ingrid repeated.

Her brown eyes finally snapped to Ingrid. “Sorry, yeah. Call Alexia, I can do that.” 

The girl mumbled, panic setting over her shaky voice. You watched as she aimlessly patted her body, looking everywhere as if she had no clue what she was looking for. She finally found the device in her back pocket, she took a deep breath, looking for her best friend's name in her phone..

Ingrid looked at you. “Okay let's go.” 

You nodded your head, but as you took a step to walk the worst of the pain finally came crashing down. Your knees gave in once more as your muscles spasmed from the ache. 

“Fuck, Ingrid I can’t!” You groaned as you knelt to the floor.

Alexia smiled to herself as she slotted the big box of caramelised chocolates in the boot of the car. She was able to sweet talk the shop owner into selling her the large supply with a photo and signature. She felt so proud of herself, she couldn't wait to show you her little accomplishment. She got in the car ready to drive back home to you, that's when she looked at her phone to see Mapi calling. 

She pressed the green button as she lifted it to her ear.

“Hola-” The blonde flinched as the sound of your screams penetrated down the phone.

“Mapi? Wh-whats going on?”

“Ale, y/n’s in labour, you need to get back.”

“What? She’s not due yet.” Alexia felt herself panicking hearing your painful moans in the background.

“Her waters broke. She’s ready. We’re going to take her to the hospi-”

A deafening scream came from the depths of your stomach. There was no way you were about to move, not with the pain you were in. This baby was ready to come out. 

Mapi looked shell shocked as she held the phone to her face, her mouth gaping at you. “I don’t know if we’re going to make it to the hospital.” The defender whispered. 

Ingrid held your head, helping you move to whatever position you needed, she grabbed the big pillows of the sofa and tucked them behind your back, her calming presence was everything you needed right now but the one you wanted most wasn't here.

“Where is she? I nee-  ahhh! Oh my god it hurts so bad! MAPI! Tell Alexia to get home now!” You started to sob.

Alexia started her engine and her phone speaker on loud. “Mapi, tell her I'm on my way, I’m coming, I promise.”

Poor Mapi didn't know what to do, she looked at her girlfriend for help. Ingrid stroked your hair, your sweaty forehead making your hair stick to your skin.

“She's coming, sweet pea, isn't she Mapi?” Ingrid looked at her girlfriend urging her to say the right thing. 

“Y-yeah, Alexias on her way. She's already half way.” The defender stuttered. 

You threw your head back as another contraction rippled through your body. 

“Breath, try to breathe.” Your best friend stroked your back. 

“Mapi, let me talk to her.” Alexia said as she pressed her foot on the gas. 

“Sí, sí.” Mapi put the phone on speaker, allowing you to hear Alexia. 

“Bebé?” Alexia's voice rang over the speaker.

“Ale! Please, I need you. Come home, please!” You begged, hearing your lover's voice.

“It's okay, amor. I’m on my way. I’ll be there as soon as I can, I promise.”

“Okay.” Your lips quivered. 

“Mapi, keep me on the phone.” Alexia called out as she overtook some vehicles in front of her.

“Sí, I will. You're next to her now.” Mapi gingerly placed the phone on the table next to you. 

“I’m here okay, cariño?” 

“Yeah.” You whispered.

Ingrid stood up. “Mapi, comfort her, I’m going to call for an ambulance.”

“W-what? Me? B-but you’re so good at it.” 

Ingrid stroked her girlfriend's face. “You'll be fine baby, you can do it.”

Ingrid gave no room for argument as she started to call the ambulance service, walking out of the room.

Mapi slowly turned around, she had never been so scared before. Walking out to a stadium of 30,000 people was less scary than this. She took a deep breath before walking over to you. She slowly crouched next to your side, trying not to make any sudden movements as if she was in a cage with a wild animal. But in all honesty, you kind of sounded like one.

You felt her hand gently rub your back. “Can I get you anything? Water?” 

“Your hand.” You whimpered. 

Mapi smiled as she gave you her hand, but the smile quickly disappeared as you squeezed it with a force not known to man. 

“Dios mio! What have you been eating!” The girl cried out in pain.

Alexia couldn't help but laugh as she heard Mapi cry out. 

“I can hear you, puta!” Mapi groaned.

“Sorry Mapi, I just need you.” You sobbed as you looked at the defender.

That made Mapi smile even if she was wincing through the pain. But it made Alexia feel so guilty for not being there, even if it was out of her control.

“It's okay, breathe with me.” Mapi breathed out.

You breathed with her, but it didn't subside the pain.

Ingrid walked back in. “They’re on their way, but it won't be for another 30 to 40 minutes.

“What?!” You and Mapi shouted in unison. 

“I can't wait that long!” You cried out.

Alexia was driving as fast as she could without being too dangerous, she definitely went through a few red lights, only because the roads were clear enough, but she was more than willing to get a speeding ticket if it meant she could be with you.

“The operator said to remove your bottoms and get towels ready incase you have the baby.”

“I’m so scared, the baby’s not due for another 2 weeks.” Your voice was shaky.

“I know, sweet pea. Everything’s going to be okay, I promise.” The raven haired girl mustard up a brave smile but you could see through it, you could tell she was worried too.

Then you felt it. An agonising pain pushed right at your core. It was happening, the baby was coming. 

“AHHHHHH! It's coming!” You screamed. 

Alexia felt dread take over her body as she heard your pain.

Ingrid jumped into action, kneeling at your feet. “I'm going to pull your trousers and knickers off okay?”

You nodded. 

Ingrid quickly removed the clothing off of you. “Mapi, go get some towels.” 

Mapi went to move but you had a python grip on her hand. The defender eyed her girlfriend for help, too scared to ask you to let go herself. the Norwegian smiled sympathetically at her. 

“You may have to let Mapi go, honey.” 

You didn't even realise you were still holding on to her, you hesitantly let her hand go. You didn't miss the way Mapi winced as she stroked her own hand from the pain. 

“Okay keep breathing, nice deep breaths.” Ingrid said.

You followed her instructions, you tried to take deep breaths, but was cut short when another crippling contraction swept over your body. The pain was nothing you had ever felt before. 

“Erghh! Oh my god! It burns. It's coming, Ingrid!” 

Ingrid was between your legs, her green eyes popped open as she saw the start of your labour.

“Okay, I’m going to call again. I might need help.” She pulled her phone.

Mapi walked in just in time to see what Ingrid was talking about, you would have laughed if you weren't in so much pain. Her eyes bulged out of her head, like a cartoon character, her face turned to a shade of grey as she also saw the start of the birth. 

“Ay dios mío.” She whispered. 

Alexia heard Ingrid, she was only 10 minutes away, she was determined to get home to you. 

You screamed as you felt a deep pressure at the bottom of your back, it made you feel sick. 

“Where’s Alexia, I need her!” You cried out.

“I’m here, cariño. I’ll be there I swear!” Alexia said over the speaker.

Mapi then came back rushing over to you, the pain in your voice made her want to comfort you.

“Hey, need my hand?” The brunette smiled as she grabbed your hand.

You nodded at your friend, tears rolling down your cheeks. “Thank you.”

You took her hand as you felt Ingrid stroke your leg.

“Hello? My friends in labour. I can see the start of the baby.” Ingrid was on the phone to the operator. “Okay, thank you.”

Another jolt of pain hit you, making you squeeze Mapi’s already crushed hand. You watched her wince in pain, easing off her as much as you could.

“I’m sorry, Mapi.” You sniffled.

“No, no it's okay. I’m okay.” The Spaniard gritted her teeth as she tried to hold back her own tears.

The Norwegian put the operator on speaker. 

“Hello, I’m Julia. I’m going to talk you through the steps, okay? You’re doing great. Keep taking big deep breaths for me. How much of the baby's head can you see?” 

“I can see the baby's hair.” 

“Okay great. Can you tell me roughly a measurement?”

“Like 5cm?” Ingrid squinted.

“Okay. She’s going to be ready to push any minute now.”

Alexia was nearly home, 5 more minutes and she'd be there. Until she saw the police lights in her rear view mirror.

“Fuck!” She mumbled.

Alexia reluctantly pulled her car over to the side of the road. She quickly muted herself on her end of the call, not wanting you to hear the commotion. She tapped her finger anxiously against the steering wheel as she watched the police officer slowly approach her car. She rolled her window down ready to apologise and hopefully be on her way.

“You know you’re going over the speed limit- oh my god, Alexia Putellas! I watched your game just the other day, you played so well. How's y/n getting on? She must be close to having the baby now?” 

Before Alexia could answer you let out a high pitched scream over the speaker phone. The police officer looked at Alexia with a confused look.

“Yeah, that's actually her. That's why I’m rushing, she's in labour.” Alexia hoped that would be enough for the police to let her go.

“Oh! Oh right, why aren't you with her?”

Alexia stared at the police officer, was he really asking this?

“Erm, it's a long story, but it's why I was rushing.”

“Ah, I remember when my own were just born. There’s nothing like it.” The police man stared off into the distance, clearly reminiscing. 

Alexia smiled politely. She really didn't need this interruption.

“Ahhh! Fuck! It hurts!”  You shrieked over the phone speaker.

Alexia looked at the phone, your cries made her so anxious, she just wanted to be with you.

“Oh sorry, I’m holding you up. You get on your way. Try not to rush too quickly. Good luck with being a mama!” The police officer nodded as he went on his way, leaving Alexia to finally get home to you.

You couldn't believe this was happening. 

You were so scared that Alexia was going to miss the birth of your baby. Alexia had been with you every step of the way with the pregnancy. Every appointment, every scan, all the birthing class, she was there, holding your hand throughout it all. Now the mother of your child was out driving around town, trying to make you happy, all because you wanted a stupid fucking chocolate bar.

“Okay, give me a push.” Ingrid said.

You took a deep breath as you tried to push as hard as you could.

“Amazing, you're doing really well.” Ingrid smiled at you. 

“Well done.” Mapi gritted her teeth next to you, trying her absolute best not to sound in pain.

“Mapi, what’s going on?” Alexia shouted over the phone speaker.

Mapi jumped at the voice. She grabbed your phone with her free hand, her other hand was sweating in your own. 

“T-The babies coming.” Mapi stuttered from the pain.

“Merda.” Alexia muttered under her breath, pushing her foot on the pedal. 

“Okay, you’re doing it. I can see the top of the head! There's so much hair!” Ingrid smiled brightly. 

“There is hair Ale! The baby has hair!” Mapi repeated Ingrid’s excitement. 

Two more minutes and Alexia would be home. Just two more minutes. 

“Okay, another big push.” The nurse called out over the phone.

“Ready?” Ingrid stroked your knee, her eyes were on you, giving you a reassuring smile. 

You nodded, taking another deep breath. Your body was tired, everything hurt, and your bottom half was burning. It felt like something was ripping you apart. Like that scene from Alien. You just wanted Alexia to be here to tell you everything was going to be okay.

“Eerghhhh!” You pushed again. The pain was unreal. “No, no, no! I can't do it!”

“You can! You're doing so well! The heads out, I can see a face!” Ingrid shouted enthusiastically.

Alexia wheels screeched as she messily parked up outside, nearly forgetting to pull the handbrake up in her rush. She ran as quickly as she could to your front door, keys in hand. 

“Okay, if you can see a face you've done the hardest part. You're done really well. Another big push.” Julia’s happy voice chimed in.

Alexia rushed down the hallway, she easily jumped over the baby gates she had installed, cursing them as she leaped. She turned the corner just in time.

You looked up to see your wife standing at the door. Her face was similar to Mapi’s reaction.

“Ale.” You whispered, not having enough energy.

The blonde rushed over to you, she knelt by your side, pushing your hair off your sweaty cheeks.

“I’m here, baby. I’m right here. You’re doing so well.” She kissed your sweaty head. 

You nearly started to cry, your emotions bubbled to the surface, finally having your wife with you in the scariest and happiest moment of your life. 

She brought your hand up to her lips, kissing you as she looked into your eyes, you could see she was scared but you couldn’t miss the love she had for you.

“You ready? Another push.” Ingrid asked from your bottom half. 

Alexia squeezed your hand, reassuring you. “You've got this, baby. You can do it!”

You took another deep breath, readying your body to do what seemed impossible.

“That's it! Push, push, push, push! It's coming!” Ingrid spurred you on.

Your whole body shook as the little life entered the world.

And she was loud.

“Oh my, god. You did it!” Ingrid laughed in disbelief.

You looked down to see a tiny little baby, crying in Ingrid’s hands. 

You felt Alexia grip your hand, you looked up at the blonde, she was gazing at the baby and you swore you saw her fall in love. She was smiling from ear to ear, her hazel eyes starting to tear up.

“I can hear crying, that's amazing. Wrap the baby up, cover the head, and place the baby on mum's chest.” Julia instructed. 

Ingrid did just that, she gently and neatly wrapped your daughter up placing her on your chest. 

“A little girl.” You whispered, tears rolling down your cheeks. 

You looked up at your wife, she had tears rolling down her cheeks, as she looked at the baby on your chest. 

“She’s so beautiful.” She whispered as she kissed the top of your head. “You did so well. Are you feeling okay?” 

“I’m fine, just tired and sore.” 

She brought her lips to yours, kissing you gently. “I love you, amor. I’m sorry I wasn’t here.”

“Don’t be sorry, it wasn’t your fault. Besides, I had two very good midwives. You smiled as you looked at the couple who were now sitting next to each, smiling at your little family. 

Alexia chuckled. “Thank you so much chicas. How’s your hand Mapi?” 

“It’s seen better days, but I’m glad I could help.” The defender smiled as she pulled Ingrid closer to her.

“Do you have a name?” Ingrid asked. 

You and Alexia looked down at the already settled baby, then back at each other.

‘Rudy.” You both said in sync. 

“Rudy Maria Putellas. I like it.” Mapi smiled before Ingrid started rolling her eyes.

“No, just Rudy Putellas.” Alexia smiled, not taking her eyes off the baby.

“But, we do want to ask you guys something.” You looked at the couple in front of you. Ingrid was already smiling and Mapi looked scared all over again.

“Would you like to be Rudy's Godparents?” Alexia asked.

“100 percent, yes.” Ingrid smiled so hard her cheeks resembled a chipmunk.

You looked over at Mapi, her eyes had glazed over, she looked like she was about to cry.

“Mapi, are you okay? Are you crying?” Alexia asked in a teasing tone, smiling at her friend.

“Huh? What? Allergies. Do you have a cat? I’m allergic.”

“Mapi, we have a cat.” Ingrid smiled sympathetically at her girlfriend, knowing the girl was clearly just emotional to be asked to be a godparent.

“Hello? The door was open. Did someone call an ambulance for a mother and baby?” The ambulance crew arrived. 

“And a broken hand!” Mapi called out, rushing to the front door.

Ingrid rolled her eyes. “She’s a big softy, she would love to be a godparent to Rudy.”

You and Alexia chuckled, but your attention quickly went back to the baby on your chest as she started to squirm.

The paramedics checked you and baby Rudy over, everything was looking great, but they still took you in to get checked by the doctors and a couple hours later you were allowed to leave. 

You and Alexia gave Rudy her first bath together, laughing as she sneezed in the baby tub. Alexia dried her off and took her to her room, she got her nappy on her and creamed her little body.

“Okay, baby grow.” You mumbled as you looked through her draws.

“I actually have one mind.” Alexia looked guilty suddenly, smiling at you playfully.

She reached into another draw and pulled out a Barcelona home kit baby onesie. She turned it around to show your number on the back. Her dopey smile looked at the kit then back at you. You felt yourself go completely giddy. You looked at the woman in front of you, her proud smile made your heart melt. In that moment you felt so complete, you had your little family in front of you, with the woman that you loved with all your heart. 

“Do you like it?” She asked as she moved back to Rudy.

“I love it. I love you, Ale.” You kissed her cheek as she began to dress Rudy.

“I love you. I love both my girls.” She bopped Rudy's nose.

Finally, you got the baby down in her cot, thankfully she was already fast asleep. You smiled as you looked at her face, you could already see Alexia’s features in her. You both stood over the cot, staring at the little bundle in front of you.

Then you remembered something.

“Ale?” 

“Hmm?” 

“Did you ever get the chocolates?” 

[beardedjoel]

smother - part i: deliverance

dark!joel x f!reader

series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3 | kofi

summary: starving. lost. desperate. you find a cabin in the woods, and to your dismay, it's occupied. a plan to have a quick bite of food with an intense, intriguing stranger turns into more than you'd bargained for when he makes you realize everything you've been missing out on. 8.6k words chapter warnings: 18+ MDNI! noncon, nonconsensual touching, dubcon - reader eventually enthusiastically consents but the syndrome is stockholming so its dubcon, reader is a virgin, big juicy age gap (reader is 19, joel is 55) manipulation/lying/gaslighting, slow burn and tension building chapter, joel is kind of a creepy menace ngl a/n: i'm so so very excited to share the first chapter of my new series! (if this flops after how much i got hyped for it i will be logging off forever) the themes in this story are dark so if the tags aren’t for you it’s understandable & just keep scrollin on by! this will end up being nasty and smutty, but only after a wee bit of buildup so don't fear. comments and reblogs are always beyond appreciated!

Save me. Please, anyone…

Another wave of desolate, crying desperation tears through you as you trudge along, tripping yet again - maybe over your own two feet, a root, the very ground you walk on, something. You’re much too hazy and burnt out to even care what you stumbled on as you just press on, press on, press on.

A wave of pain rolls through your stomach again as it burns cavernously empty. You move as a ghost, a shell of yourself now, using passing trees as support. Your hands touch the cold wood reluctantly, a painful little hiss through your teeth as your fingers practically cramp up from the cold. You’d lost your gloves somewhere along the way, days ago now, what feels like a lifetime. You need to stop and rest desperately now, your body close to giving out. Your heart hammers in fear, wondering if you’d even be able to get up again.

A cabin comes into view in the distance, tucked nicely in a clearing of trees. You think your eyes are deceiving you, that you’ve finally succumbed to the madness that comes with such hunger and loneliness, your brain conjuring up images to comfort you. You see smoke coming out of a chimney on the roof, and your heart equally swells and drops at the discovery - it’s not a shelter for you alone, no. Not a lucky discovery, somewhere to lay your head tonight that’s dry and warm without disturbance. Someone already lives here, has a home here, and they might not take too kindly to strangers. If there’s anything you’ve learned in the last few weeks of your own personal hell, it’s to tread carefully. Always.

You keep your footsteps light and quiet, trying to approach with some semblance of caution. Your empty stomach is pushing you along, begging for any scrap of food that might be inside, hopefully offered up to you by the kindness of a stranger. Berries and the occasional rabbit or lucky can of food found were not enough to live off of anymore - you could feel the way your body faded away by the day, losing any bit of strength you’d had in the first place.

You pause, hitching your breath and then barely daring to breathe at all when you get close enough to hear a sound - a low, throaty grunting followed by the crack of wood. Your eyes scan the area as you sneak closer and then land upon him. He’s broad and muscled, you can see that much from back here. Messy, dark hair that curls all around his head and down his neck. When his body turns enough that you see his face a little bit more, you notice he looks older and has dark, piercing eyes. They send a shudder through you, even from afar, only making you feel colder out in this frosty afternoon.

You wrap your coat a little tighter and decide to get closer, assess the situation, see if he seems friendly enough to give you something to eat and send you on your merry way. He swings an ax high up in the air and brings it down swiftly onto a large piece of wood, splitting it before tossing the logs into a pile already full of more firewood. You press your lips together, noticing how strong he is, betting there are well built up muscles underneath that flannel shirt of his. That makes him a threat, a big one, you quickly assess. 

You’re too distracted, not watching your step, when a large branch cracks underneath your boot. You wince and squeeze your eyes shut for a moment, holding perfectly still, your breath coming out in quick, staccato exhales.

“H-hey!” you hear a gruff voice, sounding out of breath. You peek your eyes open slowly to see the man looking in your direction and silently curse yourself. “C’mon out!” he yells, and you see him reach to his waist, hands grazing a shining revolver holstered there.

Your stomach pulls into tight knots and you stand frozen for a few moments. Your brain quickly assesses everything, weighing the options. Running away, with no possibility of eating a single thing is one option, but the likelihood this stranger will shoot you seems high no matter what, so you decide to take your chances.

You put your hands in front of you, palms out, and slowly emerge from behind the trees. You walk gingerly along the crisp, frosty grass, crunching under your feet every step of the way. Your anxious breaths come out in little puffs in front of you as the cold air enters and exits your lungs.

The man falters, his fist closing and then opening again, pulling away from the revolver on his hip a bit. He blinks hard, staring at you in this silent showdown. “W-well shit, you’re just a girl…” he finally says quietly to himself, his posture relaxing a little. You stand perfectly still, choked up now that you’re confronted with the idea of speaking to him, such a large, imposing wall of a man, and those eyes, god, those eyes.

“I’m not gonna hurt you if you don’t give me a reason to, now, girl.” His voice is the tiniest bit softer, and you pick up on his Southern drawl, an accent you’ve heard a few times before. “Do ya need help?” He wipes his forehead with the back of his arm, a gleam of sweat having built up from chopping wood and his large chest still heaving. He takes a step closer to you, and you don’t step back, but feel every muscle coil up tightly as your mind screams at you that this was a mistake, a huge fucking mistake. Your feet tingle, toes flexing and getting ready to run, but you can’t make yourself do it, to take that first step.

Instead, you nod. “I- y-yes…” you say quietly. You’ll never understand why you say it, other than the fact that you’re drawn in by him, by his chestnut hair flecked with gray, his patchy beard that he’s currently scratching. By his build that looks so… safe yet dangerous, but you get the feeling that no, he’d never hurt you. You envision those arms wrapping around you, holding you tightly, shielding you from the world and everything you’ve been through. You never thought much about relationships or boys before - just a few simple and innocent crushes, but it hadn’t been on your radar as such a shy kid and teenager. But this… this was what people talked about - attraction. It nearly stole your breath the closer you got to him, threatening to suck you into what felt like an endless void. 

“Alright,” the man replies, trying to match your quieter demeanor. He glances around, eyes narrowed and scanning the woods beyond you. “You with anyone? Or all alone out here?”

You know why he’s asking, you’ve seen what people can do - sending someone innocent and unimposing out to lay a trap, but you don’t lie when you shake your head. “A-alone. I’m alone, swear, sir.”

His jaw seems to tick, noticeable even from the distance you’re at before he answers you. “Okay, then. C’mon a little closer, I won’t bite, okay?” he says, and he’s so convincing that you do believe him, despite your instincts telling you otherwise. The world is cruel and unrelenting, taking away most of the trust you’ve ever had in humanity the second you place it into anything or anyone. 

You move a little closer, small, gentle steps, and he nods encouragingly. 

“Now there ya go. Look at ya…” he marvels with a click of his tongue, shaking his head once you’re just a few feet away from him. 

He takes in your messy hair, slightly matted from wearing a winter hat on and off the last few weeks and sleeping on the ground. Your clothes have seen better days too, your skin smudged with dirt no matter how many water sources you found to try and rinse off a little bit. Even despite all of that, he gazes at you with a curiosity, with that look of interest that you felt like you’d given him without trying to. It’s quiet for another moment, the both of you sizing each other up, until Joel’s look turns a little more pitiful when you shiver as a sudden gust of wind whips past you, your threadbare coat doing little to protect you from the chill in the air here. You can’t be sure if your shuddering has less to do with the wind and more with the way that this man’s eyes are digging into what feels like your very soul.

“We gotta get you inside, okay? You’re shakin’, and you look like you ain’t had a proper meal in… too long…” He continues to eye you up and down, taking in your weak frame. 

You stay silent for another moment, swallowing hard and then shuddering again. “I - I don’t know…” you breathe out. You might have some sudden, fantastical dream that this man is your savior, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be cautious - the mind is a tricky, deceiving thing.

“I ain’t gonna ask again, ain’t gonna beg ya, girl. C’mon,” he says a little more roughly, a hand shooting out quickly and grabbing you by the wrist and tugging. “Just want to get a good meal in you, alright?”

You wince at the grasp on your wrist, the roughness and hardness he’s starting to show you, but you let him pull, starting to move your feet and trail after him. 

“T-thank you…sir,” you murmur quietly, and he swings his head to look back at you, his eyes softening. 

“You’re welcome. Now get inside and get warm. I’ve got a fire goin’.” He lets go of your wrist, trusting you to follow him as his heavy boots clunk up the few steps leading to the front door of his cabin. It’s modest, beautifully constructed, all dark wood around the outside and a small porch. You start to wonder if this man built it himself, or just found it as it is. Your initial impression of him leads you to believe that he does seem like the type to build a whole god damn cabin. He half looks like a lumberjack already in the plaid flannel shirt, sleeves rolled up to his forearms. 

“Found this place ‘bout five years ago,” he says as if he could read your mind while he swings the door open. “Real nice and private, so don’t worry.”

Your eyes narrow slightly at his last comment, but you try to brush it off as you enter inside with him. The warm air hits your body, an immediate balm to your frayed nerves and chilled skin, a slightly smoky smell from the fire hits your nostrils and you immediately hear the crackle and pop of the logs in the little fireplace. The cabin is mainly one big room, a kitchen tucked into the corner right to the left of the door, and the living room beyond that with cozy couches and chairs, even a TV that you doubt is working but find yourself hopeful for some reason. It’s been a long time since you were able to watch a movie, flashing back to childhood memories when you’d lived in a more stable, thriving community that had power. 

Stairs beyond that lead to what you assume are bedrooms or a bathroom, and your eyes curiously take in all the little details and decor - the man’s jackets hanging along the wall near the entrance, his rifle propped next to the door and several different pairs of worn boots. 

You realize you’re just standing right near the doorway, silently looking around in a daze while your new acquaintance has been trying to get your attention. 

“Hey, girl, I’m talkin’ t’ya…” his voice says, the noise fading back into your consciousness.

You shake your head. “S-sorry,” you say quietly, a shy little squeak. “I was just -“

“S’alright. I got some stew goin’, that okay? I mean y’don’t have much of a choice, but I’ll ask anyhow,” he says with a wry chuckle. You simply nod in response. 

“Now go on, put your things down and sit ‘n get comfortable,” he waves towards the general direction of the kitchen table and the couch before turning back to the stove to stir the pot simmering there. You stand, feeling frozen still, panic threatening to climb up through your insides and completely take over. You still don’t feel safe, despite this man offering to warm you and feed you. How could you, you think, when you’ve been running for several weeks, trying to get away from the carnage that became your life. 

He eyes you, unmoving and frightened looking and sighs heavily. “I said,” he says, tension thickening in the air around you, “Sit.”

You clear your throat, desert dry and scratchy, and set your backpack by the door, slowly creeping over to the couch, not wanting to make this mystery man any angrier. You settle yourself down and the cushions feel like heaven, your legs and body achy from the lack of comfort you’ve had for weeks. You try not to show just how good it feels to settle into the soft, plush fabric, letting the cushions mold to your body.

“Good,” Joel coos as he glances at you from the stove. “Now that we’ve got you settled in, you got a name?”

You weakly tell him your name and he shows you the first little smile you’ve seen from him, nodding. “Gotcha. I’m Joel, okay?”

“O-okay.” You push the words out while you watch him stir the pot on the stove. You sit in silence for a few moments, thankful for the time to just catch your breath and think. Just one bowl of stew, and you’ll be out of here. You’ll ask if there’s a community nearby, somewhere that could take you in, then grab that information and run, not bother this man any more than you need to.

Joel walks over, handing you a cup of water that you shamelessly start to gulp down before he goes back and ladles some of the delicious smelling stew into a bowl. The second the scent hits you, your stomach rumbles loudly. Joel cracks a smile as he hears it and continues ladling, a brow quirked. 

“Hungry, huh?” he asks, walking the steaming bowl over to you with a spoon. You gingerly take it from his hands, being careful not to brush your still chilled fingers against his. You swear his eyes flash at you when he notices how avoidant you’re being, but he turns and walks back to the stove, getting himself a bowl as well. Joel settles down into a chair across from the couch where you sit with a weathered groan, just watching you for a few quiet moments. It does everything but put you at ease, your stomach twisting a little. You blow on a spoonful of stew before taking a bite, your mouth an explosion as it waters and takes in the delicious, rich, food. 

“Mmm,” you whine out, unable to help it. Your body wants to lunge forward, lap the stew up until every single drop is in your starved body and you can finally feel a sense of fullness again. You quickly take another spoonful, much too hot, and wince a little as it hits your tongue. 

“Slow on down, girl,” Joel says. “Let’s talk a little and it’ll slow down your eating.”

You just stare, noticing your body is trembling a little bit, and has been since you met Joel outside. You try to take a deep breath to settle your nerves, your legs so tensely pressed together that it's starting to hurt.

“You feelin’ afraid of me, that it?” he asks you, looking a little too self satisfied at the observation as he crosses his arms and leans towards you. His biceps bulge and stretch with the motion and you can’t help but find your eyes drawn to them, the way they pull at the soft flannel of his shirt. You feel your face heat up all the way to your ears and you blink hard, averting your eyes. 

“I- I mean… I don’t know you…” you mutter, trying to sound more confident than you feel.

“I know,” he says, sounding more sympathetic. “Done some bad things in my time, so hell, maybe you should be scared of me. I ain’t a nice guy. But I won’t hurt someone like you, promise ya that.” His words are enough of a reason for you to hightail it out of here the first second you can, but why do you believe them? Why do you believe him?

“How d-do you know I’m not bad too? That I don’t deserve it?” His eyes narrow and his lip twitches into a smirk before he lets out a mocking little chuckle in your direction.

“Oh sweetheart, a man jus’ knows these things. You never hurt even a fly, now have you?” That smirk stays plastered on Joel’s face as he asks and it frustrates you how little of a threat he sees in you, how little fight you have left to give. Yet you can’t find yourself blaming him, you think. If you were facing yourself in his position you’re sure you’d look like as much of a feeble joke as you feel.

You frown, still unable to look him in the eyes for longer than a few seconds, and shake your head. “No… just for hunting…” you admit.

“Alright then. Y’don’t need to act tough in front of me, girl, got it?” Joel concludes, going back to eating his stew.

“Got it,” you respond quietly, letting yourself sink further into the couch as you feel your muscles slowly relaxing.

“Now tell me... what’s this all about? What’s a little young thing like you doin’ out here by herself?”

You bite your lip and sip slowly on another spoonful of stew. “I’m… uh…” you stutter nervously. 

“Spit it out now, there’s nothin’ to be afraid of here, hm?” Joel tries reassuring you, but his words keep coming out so gruffly, doing little to make you feel much better. 

You inhale a deep breath. “Okay…” You swallow. “I was in a… community. I lived there a long time. T-they’re all gone now, I think. We got completely overrun and so I ran.” You sniffle as your nose starts to run from the warmth of the house opposing the cold you’d gotten accustomed to. 

Joel leans forward a bit in his chair, taking a hearty bite of stew, mulling your words over. “Overrun how?” he asks simply, glancing at you, studying your movements, your body language, everything. 

“U-uh, hunters, raiders, whatever they are. Bad.. b-bad people…” You look down at your bowl, not wanting to meet the intensity of his gaze, afraid to fall into his strange, hard warmth. 

“Hm… awful fuckers, ain’t they,” he says, scratching a hand down his beard. “You got away, then?”

You nod and bite inside of your lip, taking another spoonful of stew to keep yourself occupied. “Y-yeah. I ran and ran… just kept… going. They took everything, took over all of our homes…”

Joel sighs, his eyes finally going a little softer. “‘M sorry to hear that, darlin’. You know if anyone is still alive?”

You shrug. “No…”

“Your family? They with ya at this community?”

“Oh.” You shake your head. “No. They… all, uh, passed a long time ago.” Why the hell are you being so open with this stranger? You don’t owe him your story, your secrets, any of it. But you sense the urge to share it, anyhow. Maybe you’re just that desperate for human connection right now. 

“Mm, sorry to hear it again. We all know that feelin’ in a world like this,” he replies thoughtfully. Your eyes widen a bit at the softness he’s showing you right now and you give him a tight lipped smile to show your own sympathy for his losses. 

“You feel up for tellin’ me a little more about the attack? S’okay if it’s too much,” Joel adds on, still studying you with an odd gaze, almost like he’s drinking you in, quenching some thirst he had. His hand twitches, almost as if to reach out to you, but he’s much too far from where he sits right now. 

“I’m not sure if t-there’s much to tell…” you start, but then you find yourself spilling out more details, feeling the freeing sensation of unloading your burdens onto someone else. You tell Joel your community was small but well taken care of, plenty of supplies and food, in an abundant time in its history the last few months. One evening everything changed, when an armed group of mostly men came in, a few women and children in tow, looking absolutely miserable, and they aimed their guns in the air and shot off a few rounds to get everyone’s attention. People came flooding out of their homes, trying to run, only to be tackled or shot down, forced to give up our food and belongings. You tried to hide for as long as you could before slipping out of the home you shared with an older couple who had been taking care of you since you were a teenager, Harry and Josephine. They’d urged you to run, run, run, so you did. Then came your lost days, where you had no clue where you were, when you’d find your next semblance of humanity. Just trying to head west, further and further from the bitter memories you’d now have to leave behind. Barren towns and wilderness passed you over the days, hardly seeing another soul as you hid from infected, spending your nights crying yourself to sleep when you had the energy. 

And now… here you were, sitting on Joel’s couch and eating stew. Unsure of what the hell you’d do next or where you had to go. You had been an orphan for a long time, but this felt deeper, like you were an orphan to the entire world, almost, like you had nothing to even call your own now. 

Joel sits patiently, watching you stumble on words as you tell your story to him, trying not to get too choked up as all the emotions resurface. How empty things had been, how desolate the landscapes to match your faintly beating heart.

He’s leaned fully forward now in his seat, stew somewhat forgotten in his lap as you finish your recounting of the last few weeks. He breathes in and out, a large, heavy sigh that fills the room. It’s still now, fully quiet for a moment. 

“You’re a strong girl for goin’ through all of that, you know that?” he says finally, eyes softer than you’ve seen them yet. 

You just look down, returning to your stew, taking a few bites now that it’s at the perfect temperature. You’ve stopped shaking now, your body warmed up and starting to recognize that you’re getting full. You can’t eat much, your stomach unable to handle more just yet, so you push the stew away, setting it on the coffee table in front of you.

“Yeah…” you say, not really believing it as you glance out the window to watch the late afternoon sun, glaring off the ground outside, light filtering through the trees. 

“You got somewhere to go? After you’re fed and looked over, of course,” Joel asks, his eyebrow shooting up.

You consider lying, just to avoid what you’re afraid he’ll ask you. What you’re afraid you’ll say yes to. You still end up shaking your head silently, clearing your throat. You feel a sting of tears behind your eyes, your whole body going hot with the need to cry, but a deep desire to not show that weakness to him holds you back. You sniffle and blink, studying the knots in the old wood floors.

“Hey,” Joel says, trying to get your attention, to make you show him your vulnerability. “Look at me, c’mon now.” You hear him shift in his seat, a small movement born of irritation as you refuse to do as he says.

You sniffle again and clear your throat, a shake of your head making your hair fall forward, covering and hiding you further. 

“I said look at me.” That stern tone of his is back, sending a shudder through you and fear rippling deep inside your chest. You flick your red rimmed, shining eyes up to his, meeting the dark brown stare, lines permanently etched in between his eyes from all his years of worry.

“Atta girl,” he coos, completely pleasant now. “I got you, okay? You can stay, if ya need. I got food, a home, a warm bed for ya. If you have nowhere else.”

One more blink sends the tears falling down your cheeks, fat and overdue as they slide down your dirty skin, leaving tracks. You sniffle and nod, suddenly feeling a rush of gratitude towards Joel. He may be a stranger, but he fed you, got you warm, and is offering just about the kindest thing he can right now - an invasion on his space, his personal sanctuary, all for a girl he hardly even knows. 

“Y-you’d really do that?” you ask, a little incredulously, like this is a dream you’re about to wake up from any time now. 

He nods, a half smile pulling at the corner of his lips. Satisfaction plastered there now that he’s swayed you in his direction. “I would. Now I don’t wanna hear another word about it. You need to rest, you’ve been through a lot.”

“T-thank you. B-but-”

“Not. Another. Word,” he practically hisses, flashing his eyes angrily before it fizzles out quickly. You can see him practically having to reign in his impulsiveness in the moment. “There ain’t anywhere else to go that’ll keep you as safe as here, I’m tellin’ you that now. You’d be fuckin’ lost out there.” He sits back with his arms crossed now, and you’re worried that you’ve truly upset him now, that unsettling look in his eye glinting again. He wants you to stay… nearly seems to need it. It scares you, yet you feel a tug, a pull, some form of intrigue wanting you to explore that need, understand just what he could see in you.

“I’m s-sorry… I just - you’ve already done a lot for me, and I’d hate to, well, impose, or something,” you say, trying to appease him. It’s mostly true, anyhow, that you do hate to take Joel’s food and time away from him. 

He stands up and silently walks the few steps over to the couch, sitting down next to you, turning himself towards you. It feels like every muscle in your body tenses at his proximity - it makes him seem even bigger the way he takes up his cushion on the couch, body sinking in deeply, his wide shoulders practically a shield to you right now to everything behind him. Something about seeing him up this close is sending you reeling, able to study the lines in his face, his strong, wiry beard streaked with a few gray spots. You flick your eyes over his face, hoping to not be too obvious, but needing to drink him in, learn his features.

“I’m gonna have you listen to me right now, okay? Make sure you’re listenin’ real good, sweetheart.” He pauses for a moment to catch your eye, reaching a hand towards you but resting it right next to your thigh on the couch. “I’m offerin’ somethin’ mighty nice to you, ain’t I? You were ‘bout to die out there, if I’m honest. Much longer and you’d be a goner, I think. Don’t you?”

He’s waiting for a real answer from you, you realize, so you nod, eyes practically unblinking as you hang on his words, a hot coil burning in your stomach as you feel uneasiness eat at you.

“Right.” He sighs quietly. “I’m not tryin’ to be mean, sweetheart. In fact, I care a lot, that’s why I’m tellin’ the truth to ya like this. You ain’t built to be on your own, can see that clear as day. So I’ll have ya stay here and get fed and get your bearings. And I don’t want to hear anymore about it.” 

Of all the things Joel has just said to you, the thing that is stuck in your mind as you turn it over, is the way he’d said he cares. He cares about you. Would that be such a bad thing to be cared for, even if just for a little bit?

You give him a small dip of your head, a shaky smile coming to your lips. “Thank you. I’m uh, grateful.” You’re not sure what else to say, feeling like you’re signing yourself away to something you don’t feel sure about. 

“Ah look at that - a smile,” he says, clearly feeling much more light hearted now that you’ve agreed to accept his help. 

You sit back a little, your muscles finally losing some of their tension and start to eye Joel a little more curiously. “S-so you just live here all by yourself?” you ask, wishing you weren’t still such a stuttering mess. The fact was, this man made you nervous, in a way that you weren’t used to. He scared you, but in a way that it drew you in, a magnetic pull you couldn’t quite explain yet. Something in him commanded respect, reverence, almost, without trying. It was mesmerizing to witness, completely scrambling your mind if you started to think on it too hard. 

“Mhm,” Joel nods languidly, finishing off his stew and then sitting back with a satisfied sigh. He eyes your bowl that’s only half empty and then flicks them back to your face. “Ain’t gonna finish?” he asks, sounding a little irritated before his face softens. “Probably can’t fit much in your little belly right now, huh? Shrunk right up when you didn’t eat much these last few weeks.”

You nod. “I-it was good, I just… I couldn’t finish. It started to hurt…”

His eyes flash with concern. “We’ll take it slow, then,” he says, a little smile creeping onto his face.

You had noticed his avoidance to say much more about himself, so you decide to try your luck and press him again. You clear your throat, trying to turn towards him a little more as well. “You live alone. Don’t you… do you ever talk to other people?”

Joel chuckles, almost condescendingly. “‘Course I do. Town not too far from here - Jackson. I go once and a while to stock up, trade ‘em for some stuff and they’re mighty hospitable to me.”

You nod, trying not to let his snide laugh and tone get to you too much, blinking away the sensitive little tears that threaten to fall again. Joel cocks his head suddenly, seeming to notice. “T-that sounds pretty nice,” you choke out quickly.

“Sorry if I upset ya. Guess you’re right, don’t get enough practice talkin’ to people,” he says a little lighter now, smiling softly again. Joel’s version of a smile seems to only be a soft upturn of his lips, not friendly by nature. It puts you at ease and unease at the same time, that smile of his, but you’d rather see that than the scowl he was sporting at you earlier today. He pats your thigh a few times, showing his apology, and you watch his large hands move on you, noticing they’re scratched and rough. A man’s hands.

“W-wait… Jackson… this town. It’s close by?” you ask, glancing back up at him, the wheels in your head starting to turn. 

Joel’s face falls in an almost dramatic fashion, the lines between his eyes and around his cheeks getting deeper. “Why d’ya ask?” he says, his tone short and frayed sounding, leaning forward again, practically glaring at you from under his eyebrows.

Your own face falls, jaw slack for a moment before it tightens back up. “I just… I want to get out of your hair as quickly as possible, I-I don’t want to be a bother. Could find a new community there, or something…” You feel quiet as a mouse, unsure of how to assert yourself in front of Joel - it feels like there isn’t space for it when you share a room with him.

Joel’s expression becomes more stern. “Didn’t I already tell you, girl, that I’d take care of everythin’?” he spits out, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. You’re visibility tense now, your hands pressing into the cushions of the couch, ready to get up at any moment and bolt. “Y’don’t want to go to a place like that, so big, you’d be lost there, darlin’. Nobody to take care of you…”

He sits back a little, hands falling into his lap and an eyebrow cocked at you. “‘Sides,” he says, glancing out the window for a moment before studying you again. “Too far to go on your own. Can’t have you gettin’ lost in these woods again… look what happened last time, yeah?”

Maybe he’s right. You barely survived these last few weeks without completely losing your mind, and then your life, as he’s been so apt to tell you several times now. Joel… he saved you, and is offering you a place to stay, so the least you could do is be grateful for now. You could always convince him tomorrow, after you’ve had time to think and reset, to take you there, show you the way, and you can see for yourself if it’s a good fit for you or not.

“Y-yeah…” you stutter out, nodding. The look he shoots you has you choking out the next word before you can even think about it. “Yes,” you say more definitively.

“It’s settled then,” he says matter-of-factly, breathing in deeply, his burly chest rising, and then letting it out in a long, slow breath. “You probably wanna get some rest, yeah? I can set up the bed for ya.” Joel says, standing up and grabbing your bowl, taking it to the kitchen along with his empty one. 

“Do y-“ you start, standing up off the couch. 

“Yeah, I got two bedrooms, don’t worry.” His smile grows, liking that he found you predictable enough to know what you were about to ask. Your shoulders sag a little in relief and you give Joel more of a proper smile now, nodding your thanks.

“That would be great, then, yeah. And if it’s not too much…” you voice trails off and you stare at the ground, focusing your eyes on the pattern of the well worn rug underneath your feet. “Maybe a shower, bath, whatever you’ve got.”

Joel turns to face you and then walks back into the living area. He has a calm, serene expression, slightly lit up. “I’ll do ya one better. Get you some clean clothes to wear after that shower, too.”

Nothing in the entire world sounds better than what he’s offering right now.

You hiss loudly as the hot, steaming water hits your leg when you step in. Within moments, you’re basking under it, watching the dirt and dried blood from your various scrapes and scratches swirl down the drain for what feels like ages, finally seeing the water run clear as you lather up the threadbare washcloth Joel had left out for you and scrub yourself down. Every nook, every cranny, your scalp, face, everywhere you could get three times over. You can’t remember the last time you’d felt so clean, even when you’d lived back with your community. You hum happily for a few moments, letting the water soothe you for just a while longer. You hoped Joel could forgive you for taking a little bit of extra hot water today given the circumstances.

Joel hears the water running from downstairs, his fists balling up and relaxing over and over as he sits on his favorite chair, his gaze facing the stairs leading to the spare bedroom and attached bathroom. He feels tense, rolling his neck, continuing to pump his fists open and closed. A feeling in the back of his neck, traveling down his spine and legs that he couldn’t ignore - an urge. He stands up an instant later, not bothering with his well-ignored conscience, and walks upstairs and through the bedroom door with careful steps as he still has on his boots. He presses a hand onto the brass doorknob, turning it slowly, ever so slowly, pushing the door open just an inch, just… enough.

His eyes fall on the shower curtain, a white cloth that perfectly shows your silhouette through it. The valleys and curves of your body move around, arms scrubbing yourself. Joel can smell the evergreen scented soap drifting through the steamy, thick air, watching your body move fluidly as you start to hum quietly to yourself and rinse off.

He wishes he could lie to himself, deny that he felt the blood rush straight to his cock at this little show he was watching. So content, so sweet, so vulnerable right now. Need consumes his every cell - the need to show you just how good you could have it here, to take every bit of you for himself. He grins, a hungry little twitch of his mouth, moving to shut the door when a floorboard creaks under his heavy boot, and he freezes, shuffling out of the way quickly.

You’re humming quietly when you hear it, just a distant sound, but enough to catch your ear. A creak of a floorboard, something you figure isn’t unusual for an old cabin like this, but you feel a shiver run down your spine and rush to turn the water off. You throw the curtain open, water dripping down into your eyes. You quickly rub your fingers over them and glance around the spacious bathroom to find… nothing. You sigh, shaking your head, nearly laughing at the relief you feel. You’re just being paranoid, you chastise yourself as you grab the towel off the hook, squeezing the extra water out of your hair and wrapping it around yourself, snuggling into the simple comfort of a fluffy towel as you dry yourself off. 

Your fingers freeze, running cold when you reach the door, noticing a few inches of space that has the door cracked open. You swore up and down that you’d shut the door behind you, giving you that extra layer of privacy in a stranger's home. It wasn’t possible that… no, you think quickly, shaking your head again. You have to stop being so damn paranoid - your brain is just in survival mode still, looking for threats that aren’t there. 

You step into the bedroom, surveying the heavy wood furniture - an extremely cozy, country feel to the room with large logs comprising the bed frame and a patchwork quilt draped over the top. You peer around, feeling somewhat squirmy at the realization you don’t have any clothing. Joel seemingly came in and took your dirty clothes while you were in the shower, failing to leave you anything clean. It made you feel that strange swirl deep in your stomach again, the one you kept brushing off.

This is a kind man. A kind man, got it? Positive thinking.

You decide to pull it together and head out and down the stairs to the living room. You feel your cheeks heat up, a hot heat creeping all over your body as you feel so exposed, standing in your tiny towel as you descend the stairs. Joel’s eyes follow you down, watching your glowing skin, so fresh and clean, hair dripping errantly, leaving water droplets on the floor in your wake. You see a flash of something a little cloudy and hungry in his gaze before it disappears just as quickly as he showed it. 

He isn’t saying a word, isn’t offering anything, so you swallow down your discomfort and clear your throat a little. “Er… I noticed there weren’t any… clothes… for me…”

Joel sits up a little straighter, putting down the book he’s been looking at. He offers you a smile devoid of much emotion and stands up, his eyes locking on your hips for a few extra seconds. “Shucks, sorry about that, sweetheart. Let’s get you something right now. Got your old clothes ready to be done next time I do the washin’.”

You nod, fighting the urge to chuckle nervously as he walks over and passes you, his arm brushing your damp, bare one before he heads up the stairs. You’re grateful you get to trail him, afraid of just how skimpy this towel is if he’d have insisted on following behind you. You follow him into the other bedroom, his bedroom, and it’s a little more decorated, some books and little wooden carvings on the surfaces, dirty laundry scattered throughout. He opens up a drawer and tugs out a tee shirt, handing it to you, then a pair of gray sweatpants and warm, thick socks. 

“These should fit alright for ya, honey. We’ll get you some more proper fittin’ stuff soon, just gotta have a look around this place. This’ll be nice and warm for ya f’now.” He seems more chipper now, clearly much more talkative than before, and you suppose you don’t mind the change too much. It’s only proving that your paranoia was completely unfounded, just a symptom of your current circumstances. You typically find yourself a pretty trusting person, enough to have gotten you in trouble before, but the events of the last few weeks have broken that for you, leaving you feeling like a shell of who you once were. 

You snap back to reality and take the clothing in your arms, nodding in gratitude. “Thank you. I’ll go, um, change.”

Before you turn, Joel’s voice booms through the air again. “Need anythin’ else to eat? Anythin’ I can get you?” He almost sounds hopeful, like he wants you to need something from him. His eyes linger on your body, leaving you feeling just as naked as if you didn’t have the towel over you at all. 

You shake your head nervously. “Er, if it’s alright with you, I think I just want to rest… A full night’s sleep in a bed sounds like heaven right now.” 

“Let’s get you on off to heaven, then.” He grins, letting you leave the room before trailing after you, waiting outside your door while you change into your clothes. You discover some women’s underwear in the drawers inside of your bedroom, gratefully putting on a clean pair before throwing on everything Joel gave you. It’s comfortable and dry, so you won’t complain about the fit or the style - you’d still be in your dirty, worn down clothes if it weren’t for him. 

You creak the door open to find Joel and thank him again for hosting you, only to see him waiting right outside in the hall. You nearly jump, your face completely giving away your tense surprise.

“Jus’ wanted to make sure you got to bed alright,” he says gently, explaining himself. 

“Oh…” You bite your lip. “I, uh, I think I’m all set. Thank you again, Joel, really, for everything.”

His smile brightens as much as you’ve seen it and his eyes look much kinder as he nods, a dip of his head. His hand reaches forward and takes yours through the frame of the door and squeezes it. You freeze at the sudden touch, his hand so warm and rough, calloused fingertips grazing over the softer skin of your hands. It sends your entire body into a fuzzy flash of heat for just a moment before it dissipates. He squeezes once more, thumb swiping gently over the back of your hand before he releases it. Your lips sit parted in shock, eyes a little wider and hand starting to tremble a little. 

“Anytime,” Joel replies simply, his face falling before he turns to walk away, leaving you standing breathless for several moments before clicking the bedroom door shut behind you. 

You jolt out of your sleep, a gasp of breath catching in your throat and dying out as you go to yell, finding your mouth tightly clasped by a large, warm palm pressing in.

“Shh, shh,” the voice comes, right near your right ear. You shudder involuntarily from the hot breath fanning on such a sensitive spot  and try to yell again, letting it die out as a whimper against the skin pressing on your mouth.

“Shh, it’s alright. I got you,” Joel coos, his voice coming out hoarse. “No yellin’.”

You squirm helplessly against his hold, realizing another arm is draped across your abdomen, holding you in place. Your body exhausts quickly, still half asleep as you feel your struggle die out. Joel’s hand across your mouth loosens slowly, relieving the pressure.

“You were havin’ a nightmare, darlin’. Shh… c’mon now…” His hand that had been against your lips ghosts up to your head, landing in gentle strokes against your hair. You blink a few times, heavy breaths through your nostrils now as you try to steady your mind and body. Your chest struggles against his heavy arm as it heaves, your body fully taut and mind trying to play catch up.

“W-what…” you murmur groggily, laying stiffly as Joel holds your waist, fingers brushing against your curves, pressing you close as his other hand still works tender strokes along your hair.

“Oh, sweetheart, glad I heard you, hm?” he practically whispers, his face nuzzling close to the skin right under your ear. You feel the tickle of his breath and facial fair, prickly and rough against such delicate skin. You squirm gently, trying to signal that everything is too tight, too much, too… confusing. Joel is lost in his own world, absorbed in the softness of the places he begins to touch, hand grazing from your waist to your bare arms, fingertips exploring hungrily under the guise of being caring. 

All he’d needed, alone and laying awake tonight, his body burning and resolve thin, was a simple touch. A chance to show you all that you needed, all he could provide for you. Only to help you, to take care of someone who couldn’t care for herself. You’d proved that much to him - you needed his guidance, his protection, his experience.

“What’re you…”

“Jus’ comforting you, darlin’. C’mon now,” he whispers, never once pulling back or stopping the exploring he’s doing with his hands. 

He runs through his list of reasons to convince himself why everything he’s doing is perfectly necessary before losing sight of all of it entirely when he strikes that sliver of bare skin where your tee shirt has hiked up a bit off your waist, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. His hand travels a bit higher, pushing the shirt up and grazing famished fingers across your ribcage and stomach. A small groan ripples across his chest, the vibration felt by where your body meets his. He surprises you next by tugging your shirt back down, covering the bare skin before returning his hand to your hip, pulling you closer. He’s a wall of pure mass, muscle underneath his soft belly and chest, a man who’s strong but still showing a bit of his age. You nearly whimper and shake, feeling a sickly heat coursing through your veins now.

“Mmm…” he mumbles in your ear, your own voice caught in a trap of fear lodged right in your throat. Equally afraid of the way you don’t know how this night is about to end and that you’re not sure you mind where it’s going. You’ve never understood men or their intentions, and never had anyone bother to teach you, no worked up teenage boys offer to show you when you were at that age. No, you were left to guess, giggled at by other girls when you couldn’t pick up on their meanings as they discussed their own secret rendezvous. This had to be everything they talked about, didn’t it? The way you could feel heat and energy practically pulsating off of Joel’s body, his noises anything but natural sounding as he hummed little groans in your ear.

“Y’just needed someone, sweetheart. Y’need someone to take care of you, don’t you?” he finally says, fingers still running their way across your hair, nails scratching against your scalp. You whimper quietly at the feel of it, how damn good it all feels. You don’t move, don’t speak as he goes on.

“Need a man like me, darlin’, y’do. I can see it - need me to take care of everything…” He mumbles similar sentiments repeatedly in your ear before bringing his lips right to your neck, just letting them graze, the wet but chapped skin of his lips pressing in gently on your pulse point. You try not to gasp, the feeling as pleasing as it is terrifying, finding yourself gripping the sheet tighter to try not to give yourself away, give him any kind of response. 

“Don’t you, honey? Need me to take care of you?” He sounds a little more desperate now, needy for the answer he’s searching for from you.

He’s broken you down to the point you feel tears stinging at your eyes, the long awaited emotional release you’ve needed sitting right there on the precipice, a small crack waiting to fully rupture. You can’t be sure if you nod, just imperceptibly, you think, but Joel’s body language relaxes against you as he leans his entire chest and torso into you even more, giving you a squeeze. You know then that he got his answer, just what he was looking for. You let the tears slip out, rolling down your cheeks, onto the pillow on one side, likely falling right onto Joel’s face or in his hair on the other. He seems to barely notice, just swiping them quickly off your cheeks before resuming his position wrapping himself tightly around you.

“Good, sweetheart… good girl, I got you…” 

You hear his breathing start to even out shortly after, steady rise and fall of his chest against your body, and you realize he’s dozed off. Like he got what he wanted and decided he could rest now. Your entire body relaxes, a careful breath whooshing out that you hadn’t even been aware you were holding in. His hand is still tangled in your hair, other one possessively on your hip, giving you absolutely no room to move. You’re not sure you want to anymore, anyways, never having had such strength covering you, cloaking you from all of the dark, sinister things that the nighttime holds for you.

If you’re going insane, feeling safe with this man who forced his way around your body tonight, then so be it. Why shouldn’t you let yourself feel safe for once? Let yourself feel less of that burden, turn it over to Joel? Your own turning wheel of thoughts starts to scare you, the little voice in the back of your head telling you what you already know and have been trying to ignore. The one little thing that you immediately put your finger on but were too scared afterwards to lift it back up and observe it closer.

You weren’t having a nightmare, no, not at all. You knew when you woke from one, as sure as the god damned sky was blue and the grass was green. It wasn’t a foreign concept to you by any means after what you’d been through in your life. And tonight… tonight hadn’t been one of those nights. 

dividers by @/saradika!

thank you @jupiter-soups and @huffle-punk for always beta-ing my shit and talking inspo with me. love you to the moon and back <3

[lightwing-s]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐔𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐈𝐒 𝐇𝐎𝐓 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐄

pairing: simon "ghost" riley x reader

rating: 18+ (MDNI)

It was like the entire room shook with every step he took, his combat boots sending tremors through the floor. A proper man-made earthquake. With his stature, he towered over everybody. His presence was intense, and you could feel him coming even before hearing or seeing him, your head snapping to the entrance of the room to watch the scene attentively.

Wearing his skull balaclava, the Lieutenant returned from his practice alongside Sargeant MacTavish. You watched his chest shaking as he walked, the muscle jumping up and down like a juicy pornstar’s boobs would do, highlighted by the compression shirt he wore sticking to his skin. His sweat left it soaked, making the fabric slightly see through and his nipples easily visible. 

Swallowing deep, you felt your mouth go dry as his intoxicating smell of sweat, smoke and gunpowder filled the air. You were certain you must have looked dumb in front of all the other soldiers, eyeing your Lieutenant up and down. A tingling sensation growing on your cunt as he side-eyed you when he passed your smaller frame.

Fuck me, you wished, watching on as he started to disappear into another room. You were a sinner, of that you were sure, because nothing else could justify such a harsh punishment. Seeing Lt. Ghost Riley in person every single fucking day and all you could ever do was stare. You felt like Dionysius without his wine, or Snoop without his weed. Deprived, dismantled, deranged.

And he wore spandex today. Fucking spandex. Molding his ass and his muscular thighs perfectly, not to mention how much it emphasized the bulge on his groin, as if he knew very well the effect his choice of clothing had on you.

Fuck you, Simon. Fuck you. Fuck me.

Taking a deep breath, you turned around and returned, or attempted to at least, to your exercise. Every movement filled with days of build up frustration. Your arousal, hopefully not evident through your leggings, made its way to your nose, and you rolled your eyes out, exasperated to leave the training room.

Turning a corner, deep into whatever side of the base you stood, you found a darkened alley leading to a dead end. It was quiet, far for anyone. Resting against the wall, you let your mind wonder, thoughts of your Lieutenant crowding your head.

Your breathing was uneven, rushed, but your walk over there wasn’t what caused it. Your core ached, burned, begged for attention. Peeking briefly at your sides, you did something unthinkable, something your shame shouldn’t have allowed you to do. Putting a hand inside your leggings, you touched your aching clit, circular movements dragging soft moans out of your pursed lips.

Enjoying the sensation, the quick relief brought to you by your own fingers, you increased their speed, wanting to reach that so desirable end, the increased sensation making it harder to hold your moans down as you desperately bit your lips to stop them from coming out. 

Your mind darkened as the pleasure spread to different parts of your body, almost making you melt down the wall you were laid on. In your mind, the picture of your Lieutenant and what he could’ve been doing to you instead, crowded your mind. 

You pictured his hands all over your body, leaving purple bruises on your skin. His face buried deep into your cunt, licking your sweetness off of you. You picture his hoarse voice calling your name, but did not picture it dragging you out of your daydreams. Nor did you imagine the door closing right in front of you, revealing to you your own dreams in flesh and bone.

“Yn,” he called and you swiftly removed your hands from your pants, shame burning red up your neck. “I hope you’re aware this is a very unacceptable behavior.” 

The raspiness of his voice would have sent you on overdrive, but now it frightened you to no end. Taking slow but steady steps in your direction, Ghost had his eyes locked on you, drowsy and darkened, as yours, instead, filled with tears. Fear of what was about to come next filling you up. “Especially when your Lieutenant is right here.”

Staring down at you, he tugged at the hem of your legging, pulling it away from your skin and peeking into it, spotting the red underwear you were now thankful for selecting. He slid a hand you didn’t notice was ungloved down your pants, inside your panties, feeling his way down through your trimmed hairs and soaked folds. When he reached the spot your own hands had just been playing at, his cold fingers caused you to jolt, unused to the strange sensation.

“These naughty new recruits, always causing me some trouble,” he stated, sight still locked into your eyes.

Starting to move, his movements were much rasher than yours, rubbing at your clit ferociously from the start, dragging out moans muffled by your pursed lips out of you. Not long later, just as your vision was starting to spot, you felt him park his hand at your entrance. You had to hold his arm for support once you felt him entering your pussy, his palm fractioning against your already sensitive clit as he pushed his fingers in and out of your leaking core.

With speed, you let out moan after moan. Your legs started to tremble, as you felt your release knocking, begging to come out, and you barely held yourself up before his low raspy voice guided your eyes up to his. “With only one finger?” he stared you down, voice too close mocking for your liking.

“That was only one finger?” you cried out, a bit louder than you’d expected.

“Now it’s two.”

He resumed his movements, the new girth tearing you apart, the pain mixing with the pleasure making you wetter by the second. Noticing your weakling legs, with his free hand he pinched your ass, sliding his hand to just below it to pull you up to wrap your legs around his waist.

The wet noises his fingers were making echoed through the empty corridors, and you prayed no one else was hidden somewhere, watching you reduced to a fucked up mess on your superior’s fingers. With his finger thrusts, he stared down at you, golden lashes a majestic sight, as if you were a mere toy in his hands. A puppet he could play around with all night long.

His eyes bore deep into yours, making you feel small, diminished. Since your mouth hung open, silent moans escaping from it almost rhythmically, he held your throat and, playing first with your bottom lip, forced his thumb inside your mouth. You sucked on it like a hungry baby, and you swore you heard a chuckle come out of him.

Soon, you could feel your orgasm coming through. Your wall sucked his fingers in, needing to be filled with so much more. Your high grew, your legs suddenly light like a feather, your vision spotted, almost blacking out, and your mind blank of any proper or coherent thought. Just as you were about to come, a loud moan left your mouth, instantly to be covered by the Lieutenants free hand, making your skin burn from the accidental slapping, but only adding to your aroused sensation.

Ghost shook his head at you, removing his fingers from inside you just as quickly as the moan came out. He left you empty, hollow, as he still looked at you with a disappointed shadow in his brown eyes. 

“Pathetic behavior,” he whispered, stepping away from you. Your legs dropped to the ground, and you had to hold yourself up so as not to fall to the floor. Turning on his heels, ass shaking deliciously as he walked away, he didn’t even care to look back at you as he gave you one last warning. “Present yourself to my office, Yn. We have to think of what punishment I’ll be giving you.”

[im-just-a-boy-guys]

Would you be willing to write something along the lines of a female human getting bred by some minotaurs? The idea of being used like a breeding cow for those massive creatures just sends me in a dizzy (and the size difference *swoons*)

I absolutely love your work and would love to see your take on this ❤️

This is so HOT. ESPECIALLY bc one of my system members has a huge hucow kink. MAKE SURE YOU TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS IF YOU SEND AN ASK. you won't be notified unless it's non anonymous.

PART 2 IS OUT NOW!

(This story is kinda long, but I got excited, and there's lots of sex :3 if you want to scroll down to the juicy bits, the bg changes from pink to green.

If you want part 2 I'd be happy to oblige!

FEM! AFAB READER ON MINOTAUR BREEDING FARM. MILKING/BREEDING/DRUGGING!

(Psa, I do my nest to correct spelling, but some things may be misspelled. :] )

You had just signed up for a summer job working on a farm. You're relatively strong and have managed to build muscle while you were doing other forms of work and heavy lifting. You'd been trying to bulk up to make this easier and had gained a little but of weight that had mainly gone to your chest.

This made you slightly insecure because it made it harder to shop for good bras, but hopefully that could be changed when you had enough money from this job to do so.

You receive a phone call, the voice heavy and gruff.

"Hello? Is this (y/n)?"

"Yes it is!", you answered in your bubbly work voice, though you were very exited, hoping it was one of the places you'd applied for.

"Wonderful. This is the dairy farm Cali Dairy? I'm looking at your application, and you look like you'd be a perfect fit for what we're looking for."

He sounded so sweet, and both this and the acceptance made your heart race. He was a good sign that the company would probably be good to its employees.

"That's amazing! When and where do I meet you? Is there an interviewing process for information or will that he sent to me?"

He chuckled softly into the phone at your eagerness.

"Yes. The information will be sent to the email attached to your resume."

"Thank you so much! Have a great day!"

"You too."

He replied as you ended the call. You squealed into your pillow and anxiously awaited the email.

A ping sounded on your computer and you clicked on the notification. The email reads,

___________

"Dear applicant,

We are happy to welcome you to the Cali Dairy family!

Please meet with the supervisor, Daniel, at 477 Milky Whey, Sacramento, California. 95872. On Monday, August 5th at 10.30 AM.

(This is not a real place, and I hope you like the pun.)

You will be moving to one of our in-house apartments. You will be shown around and be given ample time to move and adjust.

If you have any questions, please reply to this email and we will get back to you soon.

Sincerely, Cali Dairy.

_________

When you applied, you saw something about comfortability moving for work and had selected yes, but you didn't know the extent of it. You didn't think much about it and figured that anything you needed to know would be explained on Monday when you met the supervisor.

You wondered if the supervisor was the same kind of sounding man on the phone but passed the thought off to the side as you began to plan on packing.

The coming week and a half passed as you began to pack up your own apartment, you wanted to make the move as easy as you possibly could to work sooner and you figured you'd just unpack after your shifts.

You prepared your outfit for the next day excitedly, deciding on a baggy older shirt with a bike design on it and a pair of your straight leg work jeans. You didn't expect to work on the first day, but you wanted to be prepared just in case.

The next morning, you woke to your 8 am alarm, your body vibrating with excitement. You took a 30 minuite shower, making sure to use extra of all of your various coffee scented soaps and scrubs. You topped it off with a heavily scented, "whisky and coffee" lotion and dryed your hair, and put it up in an old soft tee shirt, a trick you'd learned from your mom.

You slipped I your clothes, by now 8:45 and pulled the tee shirt off of your head and list let your hair down, de-tangling it quickly before grabbing your phone, keys, and anything else you'd need.

You shoved the various things into your bag and drove to the address you were given. The further and further out you got from the city. The open roads lead into fields of various crops and trees. Redwoods were tall and towered lightly along the road side and you enjoyed the scenery. If this was where you were going to be, you'd be happy about it. The drive was so peaceful, and much better than the traffic you were used to.

You arrived at a large, farm house- looking building and pulled into a paved driveway full of a few other vehicles. As you looked around, there were various small walking trails to other buildings with various lables and signs scattered almost like a college campus. The sign on the building you pulled up two read, "reception and Managerial office."

You smiled and gathered your things, turning the car engine off and stepping out. You could feel the energy charging through your veins as you walked over to the steps of the quaint building.

As you entered, there was a front desk, no one was there but there was a small paper taped to the front of the desk.

"New hire, the office is down the hallway, the supervisor should be waiting for you."

You meandered down the hallway and gently rapped ( a soft knock, usually with two out of your 4 main fingers) softly on the door.

"Come in." You heard the low voice through the door, deep but still light. You entered and looked around the office before your eyes landed on the bigger -man? Behind the desk.

You'd seen many other species in your day to day but you'd never met a Minotaur, but there one sat. His thin coat was shiny on the parts that weren't covered by the sizable black polo shirt he was wearing. You could see just below his waist to the brown leather belt and blue jeans he wore.

They squeezed lightly around his large thighs, you couldn't help but stare and hadn't noticed you were.

"Hello, y/n?"

You smiled as you were snapped back to reality.

"Yes, that's me!", your face flushed. He looked kind of nice in what he was wearing.

"I hope I'm not under dressed - I sincerely thought I might be doing some lifting today or just starting work, so I wanted to be sure -"

He cut you off and smiled - "It's alright. I don't blame you. I'm just a manager so don't let my atire fool you. I'll show you around if you'd like."

You beamed and nodded, clutching your bag over your shoulder. He stood, and you could hear the wooden floor creak under his weight. He was huge, at least a couple of feet taller than you.

"My name is Daniel, by the way. It's very nice to meet you."He held his big hand out to shake.

You were just now looking at his features, a slightly humanoid bull head sat on strong shoulders, the colors of his fur were so beautiful, deep browns blending into whites around his nose and eyes. His eyes were a deep brown and they shown in the sun as he looked down at you.

You took his hand to shake it, and he gripped your hand very softly and shook once. He held your hand so gently for such a bug creature. He was so beautiful, it was all you could think about. As he passed you, you realized that you were only chest hight, the thought made you blush deeply.

"You coming?" He chuckled as he walked out of the office.

You scrambled to get behind him as he led the way, and you were happy to follow. As you two walked along the path ways. You passed a smaller building that read "Medic" and locked your head.

"First thing, you go into this building. This is where you will have your physical, where our nurse will check you over and make sure you're fit to work."

You nod and walk into the building. He doesn't follow.

It's a one room doctors office. You walk in and see a slender red head turned away from you, facing a counter. She seems to be investigating a sample of some kind.

She must've heard you walk in as she turned around halfway.

"Hey! How can I help you? You need a bandaid or something?"

She didn't recognize you hut was clearly preoccupied.

"I'm a new hire - I'm here for my physical?" You offered this answer shyly. She was very pretty. You saw her fully as she turned around, her face was thin and her nose slightly pointed. She turned to the side to grab something, a Greek nose. She was the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen, even more than the burley man you'd left him outside.

Her eyes were a bright, shining blue. "A physical, huh? It's been a minute since we've gotten a newbie. Alright, sit on the table." She gestured to the doctors table.

You hopped up onto the table, which caused your large chest to bounce and recoil. You blushed and gently put your hand on your chest to hold them still.

She looked to the side at you and smiled.

"Yeah, big chests are so much fun-" she gestured to her own chest, which was actually now that you looked. Almost just as big as yours.

"That being said, we're going to do some measurements and get you a special support bra. The world you do is going to have a lot of moving, so we want you to have the maximum posture assistance and comfort that helps protect your back and chest. This does mean that I'm going to have to touch your chest. Are you alright with that?",

You nodded, and the blush spread from your cheeks to your ears. "Yes, that'll be okay -"

She nodded and pulled out a clip board and readied it. With one hand. She gently felt across your chest, very gently squeezing and prodding in different places. She would ask if you could feel a touch here and asked if it hurt when she pressed in another spot, all of this caused your pussy to scream. Her hands were so gentle, and your chest was so sensitive.

She began to pick up on it and would grab harder here and there. She finally stopped and wrote down a few things on her clipboard.

"Bra size looks to be a double or triple D? Thirty-six, maybe?"

She was right, "yeah, 36 DDD." The woman nodded and waved her hand.

"Alright, we're done. You can go. My name is Dr Sylvia. It's a pleasure to meet you, and you are?"

"(Y/n), nice to meet you too."

"Alright, you can go now."

You thanked her and left the building, finding Daniel leaning against the wall to the side of the door.

"You done already?"

"Yes."

"Alright." He continued to lead you around

To various buildings, one of which reading "Spa" as you passed it.

"Oh there's a spa?", Daniel nodded.

"We take good care of our employees here. We make sure they're all relaxed. Relaxed workers work harder and better. Science fact." He smiled proudly.

He showed you around until about 2:30pm and asked you if you had any questions. You asked about your moving situation and what was paid for and what wasn't. He informed you that in a couple of days or when you were done packing, moving men would come help me move my things if I call him to ask.

Once everything was sorted, you made your way home, through the beautiful fields and trees just kind of talking in your own head.

Your mind and heart raced as you thought about your attractive new coworkers. They were both so incredible looking and both seemed so genuine and sweet.

Once you arrived home, you found your cunt drooling and a light buzzing in your clit, you needed to get off so badly. You wandered over to your drawer, undressing from the waist down with one hand as you fumble with the buttons. Once that gentle hum starts, you practically shove it between your legs, crying out as the vibrations sent pulses through your throbbing cunt.

You fought to get out of your underwear, desperate to shove something inside of yourself. You were just desperate to have something in you - God anything.

You thrust your index and middle finger into your wet hole, moving them around right up against your g spot. Your moans fill the room, not caring much about your neighbors. It was one of your last nights anyway.

This turned into hours and hours of teasing and edging yourself. Rolling around in bed and imagining the two beautiful creatures tossing you between the two of them, choking on the Minotaur's cock while the Dr ate your pussy, this thought alone was enough to make you ruin your sheets with cum, squiriting violently and crying out.

You breathed hard as your orgasm shook you softly as it fizzled out. "Fuck-", you mumbled to yourself and cleaned up, changing the sheets.

You weren't required to come into work until your things were moved so you spent the next week finishing packing and called Daniel. You found yourself giddy to talk with him.

"Hello?"

"Hey! It's (y/n) everything is all packed up and I'm ready to move officially whenever."

"Alright. Make sure you mark boxes fragile, then come here in your car and bring a bag for your essentials, I'll show you your apartment and give you your key."

You giggled softly,covering the mouth peace of the phone. "Yep! No problem!", you excitedly grabbed a marker and made absolutely certain that anything you COULD carry you would. Any small things you would need were transported to your car and you drove to the place you had met the larger man the week prior.

Once she arrived, the sun was setting and she walked to where she knew the man's office was and found the door open. He stood, and she once again remembered her size.

"Alright. I'm going to drive my stuck, you follow me in your car and I'll show you where the apartment is."You followed him out and started up your car. You watched him get into his and follow him around the plot of land to a set of nice-looking buildings with balconies.

He parks in front of building number 256. Daniel smiled as he stepped out of His car. He tossed me my key and you cought it, smiling smugly. He raised an eyebrow to you as if to playfully question your ego. Daniel walked foward and you followed him to aparrtment 27,, thankfully one of the upper apartments. this meant you wouldnt hav an upstairs neighbor. when you unlocked the door, you walked in and gasped at how big the space was.

"Do you like it? We'd be happy to change the room if it's not to your liking.", You gasped and shook your head.

"No no no- it's amazing! This is the biggest apartment I've ever seen!"

You walked in to a large, light hardwood floor, that space leading into an open kitchen across the room from the front door. In the far left of the living room, a hallway that probobly lead to the bed and bathroom. You wandered across the room and into the hallway, to the left was the bathroom, showcasing a large walk- in, rain shower. in the corner, a large round bath tub.

You gasped more in awe. These people had to be some sort of loaded - you'd figured being it was 26 dollars an hour, at least that was the most you'd ever been paid.

As you walked through, Daniel watched you carefully, watching your expression and smiling to himself. You walked into the bedroom, which was carpeted and ginormous. On the far side, right-hand side of the room, there was a door to the balcony.

In the middle of the room, there was a mattress up against the wall.

"I've just received a text that the guys are at your place, and I have them grabbing your bed frame in a separate car. We supply the mattress because we like to ensure your comfort. This brand has been proven to be the most comfortable."

You nod absentmindedly, just excited you were at the new place.

"You start Wednesday, I'll leave you to unpack and get as comfortable as you can." He bowed his head lightly as a goodbye and left the apartment.

You were honestly pretty tired from all of the excitement and just fell asleep on the empty mattress, which wad infact the most comfortable one you'd ever laid on.

Over the coming three days, you unpacked and built your bedframe, turning your apartment more and more into your own every day. The movers had brought your things unto the living room area while you were asleep, which only worried you slightly, but nothing had happened, so you brushed it off.

It was now your real first day. You hear a ring at your doorbell and see a package on the ground. You take it inside and unpack what looks to be a new braw, the one the Dr was talking about assumedly.

You slip it on and adjust yourself as needed, finding joy in the comfort and support. There was an adjustable posture corrector built in with small straps to help adjust from under your arms.

You slipped on a tee shirt over the bra, just another one of your old vintage tees you used for work and your work jeans. You receive a text telling you to meet the Dr at the 'stables' in 15 minutes.

You were super excited. You loved form animals and wondered which one you'd be working with, saying stables would probably mean horses or just a holding for cows.

You drove over to the stable section and parked your car in the small lot in front of the building. You could see a pen that stretched around the back side of the building, but you couldn't see what was in the. The Dr Sylvia met you at the door and smiled.

"Well well. So I see the bra came in. Looks good on you if you don't mind me saying. Is jt comfortable?"

You smiled. "Absolutely! I love it."

A sly smirk slipped across her face. "I'm going to be honest, "You're not going to wear it more in your free time to help build posture and, of course, for when you go out. But this job is alittle different from most. "

This confused you, of course, because in that case, why make the bra and say it was for work? Regardless, she followed her into the building as we're met with an incredibly loud wiring and another sound you couldn't quite place because the sound was so overiden by the machine noise.

The Dr showed you to a small stall that was to your surprise, empty aside from a few things you weren't paying much attention to. The Dr smiled and pulled a small syringe out of her pocket full of a clear liquid.

You cocked your head slightly. "This is an ati-biotic that will help with possible issues with the bulls. Just incase there's anything that we don't catch in time it keeps you from getting sick."

This made sense, so you held out your arm for her, and she shot it into a vein. Within minutes, you felt lightly energetic and then very euphoric. Sylvia smiled as she saw this take effect, and your mind fogged.

She led you into the contraption you hadn't really seen until now, a small bench with arm and leg cuffs. "Undress please", you knew better but couldn't help it. Whatever this was was a truth serum on steroids or something.

Except, instead of telling the truth, you just did everything you were told. You stripped down sheepishly, and she helped you straddle the bench and lock your limbs into place. She adjusted the bench so the back was slightly higher than the front.

Your breasts hung over the front, and a separate arm slipped into place around them, holding your nipples to be aimed down at the ground.

You could feel your chest begin to ache, yout tits felt- full? You were just coming to terms with the possibility of what was about to happen and began to panic internally, though with no real affect to your body, which felt heavily sedated.

You could hear the machine noise start to get quieter, and moans radiated from the stalls around you. Your face flushed as you came to further terms with what was going to happen, then it clicked - bulls. Was there going to be more Minotaurs?

Just then, a door opened up behind you, and you heard huffing as a solution was spread across your entrance, sticking gently between your lips.

"Alright. You are perfectly safe, and all of our bulls know to be gentle with our newcomers. This doesn't mean they won't be exited, but you'll definitely adjust. This Gate behind you will open, and the bulls will be let in."

Sylvia smiled softly and gently ran her fingers through your hair. "You're gorgeous." She winked and left the stall. You heard a latch lock into place, and a buzzer sound as the gate behind you opened

You tried to listen, but it was harder and harder to stay focused. You were feeling less and less sentient by the minute, and God did your tits feel heavy.

You heard scuffing against the hay that coated the wooden floor and tried to listen harder, not knowing what to expect. There sounded like multiple creatures stepping.

The big hulking creatures investigated you, groping softly at your flesh.

"She's perfect," one of them grunted.

"I call first dibs!" You heard what sounded like impact and assumed they were pushing each other around.

Were they fighting over you? The idea made you swoon.

Soon, you felt something wide pressing gently against your entrance.

"Fuck she's so tight!-", one of them moaned out softly as he began to gently tease his tip into your hole. You moaned out softly. You'd had sex a few times, but it was nothing special, but these creatures were so huge. Their tip felt bigger than most toys you'd used if you stacked them onto each other.

He was infact very gentle at first, the other Minotaur walked over infront of you, his cock was room hard and the size of your head, you couldn't help but drool as he gently opened your mouth with his thumb.

"She's pretty too- can't wait to fuck her throat. Her lips are so plush she looks like she gives good head-", He chuckled and rubbed his thumb over your lips, slipping it into your mouth. You sucked softly, you couldn't help it.

Your cunt grew wetter and tried to stretch, gripping desperately at the other creatures' tip. You moaned over the Minotaur in front of you, and he raised his tip to your lips, pulling his thumb out.

You found yourself opening your mouth for him, though not sure if any of it would fit. He chuckled.

"Adam, this one's very eager to please - she might be my new favorite."

"Mine too - fuuck I could do this all day with just my head. I can't wait to feel her pussy when I'm all the way in-"

You blushed softly. You were so watery, but you did feel happy to be used to be useful. He gently pressed his head against your lips, and you tried to greet him with your tongue, licking softly around the exposed head.

You even tried to lean forward slightly to accommodate you. He smiled and stepped forward.

"Oh my god, her tongue is god send-"

"Were gonna have to swap - I wanna try -"

This must've been normal to them. They talked and bickered like this is a daily occurance- favorite? Maybe they'd pick you more- his cock feels so good and it was barely in at all.

As time passed, they began to push themselves further and further into your holes, making themselves fit. Soon enough, adam was keeping a steady rythem and fucking you, his tip alone tickled your cervix without even trying, while the other held your jaw gently while he fucked into your throat.

"Just breathe through your nose and relax your throat, sweetheart. Makes it hurt less."

You found yourself blushing. He was so kind of considering. You listened to his advice, and it made the experience more heavenly. You had been trying to figure out how to do it comfortably for a while. You had a tough oral fixation that you'd been trying to fulfill.

This was everything you never knew you always wanted, your cunt dripped wet around Adam's cock and you drooled on the others, taking them both as far into you as you could.

"How's her mouth feel, Erin?"

"Fucking amazing, she's so good at it!"

You smiled to the best of your ability around him and tried to move your tongue as he thrusted.

Erin's hands moved to the back of your head to steady it as he moved, yiu could feel his cock throbbing in your throat and even swallowed around him to help him finish, moaning lewdly anyway from Adam's roughness with your pussy.

"Fuck I'm so close!", Erin called out and his hips picked up speed, your brain went almost entirely foggy, this was the best thing you'd ever experienced, Adam groaned and he picked up speed aswell, you could feel his knot pressing up against your entranced as he desperately tried to fuck it into you.

Within five minutes he'd managed to shove his knot in your drooling cunt and Erin pushed his knot to your lips as he came harshly down your throat, you choked lightly but tried your best to swallow.

Adam spewed cum what felt like right into your womb and you cried out and coughed slightly against Eric's length. He pulled out of your mouth and you gasped for air.

"You're stuck here for a minute, doll. Gotta make sure you get bred properly."

You nodded and gripped at his shaft with your walls. During the wait period, Erin smiled and petted your head gently, playing with your hair.

"You did such a good job for us. We're gonna swap out and have s'more fun with you, and then you'll get your pretty tits milked." He chuckled and gropped one of your aching breasts. You whined and struggled lightly against your restraints.

"I'd better not. Dr Sylvia gets irritated if we milk you and waste it."

You were confused about the milking, but you truly felt like a breeding cow. It was your favorite thing.

After a moment, finally Adam's knot swelling went down, and he was able to pull out of you. His cum spilled out of you and slipped down your thighs. It was so warm. They swapped places and you finally were eye to eye with the cock that had filled you to your cervix and allyou could think about was getting it into your mouth.

You opened your mouth for him, sticking your togue out. He pressed his head to your tongue and immediately shoved unto your throat. As Adam plunged unto your throat, Erin pushed violently into your stretched, swollen pussy.

They both let go of being gentle, fucking you roughly from both ends, your brain just melted into what you now knew to be affection from the two bulls. If you were turned into a cow for them. So be it.

You were reeling and losing your mind as they used you, your cunt gripped at Eric harshly as you came violently and squirted against the bench you were against.

This caused Eric to shove his knot in you, he cane quicker than he thought he could, he'd never had a pissy so good and he was so sensitive from the first use that it was so easy.

Adam, however, was not satisfied so easily, gripping your head and absentmindedly fucking roughly into your throat, his knot pressing against the your mouth. You did everything you could just like with the other, massaging his coks with your throat as you moaned and swallowed against him. He groaned and gripped your hair as his cock throbbed.

"Fuck- fuck- right there, fuck your tongue is so good!", He grunted as he pushed into your throat as far as he could and came down your throat, you swallowed against him, sucking on him like a straw.

He pulled out of your mouth and chuckled, petting your head softly. Both of the creatures bent down in front of you and littered your face with licks and kisses, both of them groping you softly and affectionately.

"You were wonderful, love. Thank you for your time." They left through the gate. They came in and pressed a button that closed the gate, a soft alarm sounded, and the Dr came in.

"Well, did you have fun on your first day?"

She smiled and carried a machine into the stall, a pump of some kind and attached the sucker's to your breasts.

You nodded haphazardly, and she turned on the machine. Your tits were so sensitive, but them finally being drained from being so heavy was so relieving. Your legs quivered and sme smiled up at you, crouched on the ground.

"Look at you! You took them so well. And you'll do this every day and be driven back to your apartment by an assistant. We'll have someone take your car back to the parking lot, and you can be picked up as well to make it easier. We just have to assign you a caretaker. If you don't mind, I'd like that to be me."

She looked up at you with those beautiful eyes, and how could you say no? Your tits were empty before you knew it, and she detached the sucker's.

"Look at all the milk you made! Wow!"

She sat it down to the side and gathered your clothes for you and wrapped you up in a robe shed briyght, helping you back to the little golf cart she used to get around. She helped you in and handed you your clothes to hold and put your milk container on the back.

She drove you to your apartment, letting you rest quietly. Once you arrived at your building, she helped you up the stairs and into your apartment, which she was given an extra key to. Sylvia helped you into your room and laid you down on the bed.

"You should rest for an hour and then take a bath to help relax your muscles and, of course, clean up. Have a good night."

She left you alone to your dazed thoughts. You sobered up from whatever shot she gave you and cleaned yourself up. You were so excited for tomorrow.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Sleepover w/ the digital circus cast

been a while since ive written this style of post for tadc, but im on my computer again so hopefully writing so much wont be too grating! reminder that i do not currently take requests for the entire cast in one post-

notes: reader is gn, not really romantic, written with the idea that everyone is having a sleepover in the main area of the circus

cws: bugs

caine

does not sleep but he wants to feel included, hes the one providing the games and activities for the night, as well as bedding for everyone to use

pretends to sleep, probably totally incapable of sleeping unlike the circus members... fake snores to try to sell it and make it convincing but all it does is it keeps everyone else awake

the games mentioned are usually an exaggerated and insane version of them- truth or dare but if you lie or refuse a dare you were given you get locked in the cellar/j

oh he definitely would try to get some juicy conversation with you or another circus member- god forbid you show some small sign that youre crushing on someone, hes not going to leave you alone

even worse if he finds out you actually do and who it is

his version of spin the bottle might get a little insane, knowing him.. definitely rigs it lands on whoever you like

pomni

not very interested, but if this takes place post episode 2 shes more inclined to join everyone for the night to get to know everyone better

if you two have grown close she sticks with you during the insane games caine has set out

completely opts out of any games that look way too intense but she probably gets roped into it by some of the others- or simply being swept into the chaos

sleeps off to the corner a bit away from everyone else so she can at least try to get a good nights sleep

if SOMEONE (jax, or even caine) gets too overwhelming or annoying she just gets up and goes to her room... you might be able to coax her back out

ragatha

as mentioned in jax's section, she offers to let you lay next to her if jax is bothering you

if you ask her, she does your hair before you go to bed. brushing through it and if its long enough she ties/braids it up for you

if you have a sleep set- unlikely given that they cant take their clothes off but we can pretend caine snapped his fingers and changed everyones clothing or something- she compliments how it looks.. if its cute or if it looks comfortable

if youre still awake and open to it she talks to you quietly when she cant sleep, its actually a nice change of pace against the chaos of when everyone else was awake

you dont talk about much, you just check in on each other and ramble about nothing in specific... keep it down or caine will come on over and try to insert himself

jax

hes the reason the cw is here, hes going to put bugs in your blankets if you guys arent sharing his room. if the two of you are in your room, or if you guys are in the common area hes going to do it.. or put something else thats unpleasant there..

thinks its funny, knowing him he might actually laugh a little off to the side as you thrash your sleeping bag around

snack hoarder, especially if theres candy- good luck trying to get more than a handful from him, hes not much of a sharer

tries to play everything off when someone offers to let you come lay down next to them for the night- likely ragatha

tells the most grotequse and horrifying stories before everyone else goes to sleep

"first person game mcs dont blink" is said as everyone is trying to unwind or something along those lines

kinger

has the softest and comfiest pillows and blankets, from his fort of course! likely sleeps in it rather than out and exposed on the floor with everyone else

makes it a little larger so you can crawl inside with him- its a lot calmer in here than anything thats happening out there

small talk, you both talk about your interests though due to kingers nature the conversation bounces around a lot

he doesnt participate in the games for the most part, especially if its after a high energy adventure... hes a little drained after the day- physically and mentally

sleeps with at least an arms length of space between the two of you unless you tell him youre comfortable with him being closer

dad snores

zooble

not very interested, probably stays in their room for most of the night if not the entire night

if theyre around when jax is telling scary stories they just roll their eyes... theyve heard worse

zooble being a horror/disturbing media fan headcanon my beloved, they probably try to one up him... though theyre not taking it very seriously. theyre not all that interested in winning, but jax is and hes going to get annoying

if they go out and interact with everyone else, theyll go to their room when theyre ready to sleep. they dont want to sleep on the floor in some sleeping bag.. offers to walk you to your room if the horror talk got to you

gangle

sits in her own corner doing her own thing, you can convince her to join in on the more tame games if you promise to stick with her

sticks around with you after that but like... lingering to the side, not really glued to your side because she doesnt want to invade your personal space or make you feel uncomfortable

very quiet if you offer to let her lay down next to her in the night

its a little less awkward if her comedy mask isnt broken but knowing how fragile it is, its unlikely

refuses to participate in any games like 2 truths 1 lie or truth or dare- she just knows jax is going to hang whatever she says over her head even if hes not the one asking her questions

[hobiespick]

Heya! I was wondering if you got any headcanons for Sam Winchester x werewolf! Reader, except, reader can actually turn whenever she (or gn if you want) wants, and the only real thing a full moon does is force her to be in her werewolf form (aka force her to keep the wolf teeth and claws out for no reason)

The thing that should not be

Pairings : Sam Winchester x reader

a/n : FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HI, HELLO, IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG I SUCK SO BAD, IM SO SORRY. My requests aren't open (yet) but its not even your fault I should have 100% specified that, but this is my first ever ask and ur also one of my favourite moots and I didn't want to dissapoint so here are some fuckinf cute Sam x Werewolf!Reader. I felt the carnal need to write a metric fuckton of context before getting into the actual headcanons (which are very long I have no idea if they can be considered as hcs) so the reader gets beaten up by earth-shattering plot purposes :3. Sammy juicy headcanons start when you see the '🧿' emoji if you don't wanna read the context (melodramatic sigh). And yes the title of the fic is based on the metallica song :). as always, enjoy my shitty thoughts <3

Warnings: angst with comfort (no don't clap it's fine, omg ur makin me blush); guess who joined the cool kids club and uses "____." instead of "Y/n"; literally a flash of gore, shitty dad(s), fake death, mentions of suicide, Sam looks at you and goes DO YOU WANT M-; Dean being himself; reader is also a hunter and has been raised like that (fml); Dean makes a twillight refrence; reader is frankenstein coded in the most nuanced way, Mary Shelley please don't haunt me; Dean is very happy to have a bestfriend/sister :)

word count: 8,102

- Okay, so for starters, the fact that you aren't actually a monster (you don't get the urge to kill or wreak havoc) is actually a supernatural miracle.

Your parents haven't talked to you since you called them the night you were hunting a werewolf and told them, horror-struck between sniffles and voice cracks, that it bit you, and you’re going to turn, and you’re horrified, and you’re going to drive home to put a pistol in your father's hand and hopefully stop you from turning in the thing you shouldn't be.

Your father replied, after successfully not saying a word besides "Hey, kid-" before getting cut off by you and your hiccups. He sank his teeth into the inside of his cheek, enough to draw blood.

"You are not to come home; your mother won't bear to see you like this."

Your father objected before telling you you can finish the job by yourself; you always have.

He abruptly ended the phonecall like you weren't his daughter, more like an annoying salesman. You don't know what he'll say to your mother after that call; that was the hospital, and you tragically died? "Died a hero.." Your father would say when he described another hunter's tragic passing at the dinner table—paranormal tragic passing. So paranormal that your mother had knocked on wood and prayed it wouldn't get you or your family.

So you don't call, It's really me, dad. I'm fine, I figured it out by myself. How could you? after him suggesting it's better to kill yourself than take a shot at finding a solution together? You would rather have him believe you're dead. Or at least cry with you; it's okay, honey. come home; it'll be okay, spend the last days at home, please-

The last word you get from him is a text message you are too quick to open on your flip-phone to see the next day. When you rub at your eyebags after tracking down a witch, the witch. It was the second day when everything about you felt off; you were squemish, anxious, and haven't left your motel room all day. if you get this—the message read, "if you get this?!" if you get this, if you get this, if you get this—your brain repeats it over and over, taking the words apart and tattooing itself that phrase, because it held much more meaning to it than your father probably didn't intend; he would hear it if he read it before sending, you thought, that little 'if' haunting and tormenting like a damn demon. if you haven't already killed yourself; if you haven't already turned into something that took my daughter, my pride and joy, away from me; if you haven't already died–

- speaking to you like he's directly referring to the disease in your veins. Your brain moves on and reads the next ridiculous waste of your attention. I wanted you to know I told your mother that it was the hospital I was talking to yesterday, calling that you’re dead, house fire, so no remains to pick up—Damn, you know him or what? Even your fake death is stripped away from it's respect—"no remains to pick up"—like a toppled statue, a monument of what was once a hero (in dad's old-fashioned monster-hunting world), shattered and insignificant, no longer breathing or living, if you ever even had. Or a tree struck by lighting, again, "no remains to pick up" no meaningful remains or genuinely nothing, just a memory of another young hunter who died 'tragically'. You could imagine your tombstone with an even dumber epitaph to match it and an empty or nonexistent grave lying six feet underneath for closure. Your eyes move on, there will be a funeral with no grave, of course, I just wanted you to know that your mother and everyone else is devastated, we miss you, sugar. I love you, kid. Your father had overestimated your suicidal tendencies, and the way he didn't try to save his daughter in order to not go against the rules and possibilities of hunting only showed you how much he loves you.

So you track down the witch. You barely make it to her doorstep when she opens it with a too reassuring smile, saying your name and that she expected you, even going as far as offering you tea after opening the door and letting you in, to which you declined. You're not an idiot. But you do sit down, forced, when she, Willow Thorne, won't have you, a guest, standing up, a whole damn hunter being forced to sit down and accept being treated kindly like you deserve. When you walked in, the entire image of a satanic worshipper who sold her soul to demons and hexed everybody—that you betted all your life savings fitted the description of Willow shattered and laughed in your face.

Her home was filled with plants hanging and resting in every corner she could place; various crystals were sitting in cute porcelain plates like candy, candles of different colors on a bookshelf filled with books like The Language of Flowers, Astronomy for Beginners, and Sigils. Even more crystals, bigger and taller ones on a purple tablecloth. The house is adorned in shades of dark purple, violet, green, and warm colors. This home was a whimsigothic musem that would send your thirteen-year-old self into a shrieking, excited mess. Your parents never let you own crystals or a tarot deck; they were too afraid you'd turn darkside one way or another. well, mommy, daddy, if you could see me right now with lycanthrope blood pumping through my veins.

Willow Thorne is a wiccan type of witch; she does not receive her power from demons; she receives her magic from nature and probably practices her witchcraft the way she sees fit. This doesn't help build back the distrust you were trained to have in her. You flinch when you feel a tail curling around your bouncing leg; you glance down, and your eyes are met with a black cat's green ones—this must be her familiar—the little words on his purple collar reading 'Creek'. She gives you another flash of her warm smile and starts talking about her cat. This can't be real. Your every instinct screams that you should take her down or that she will take you down. Your options shrink the longer you stay. You keep a hand anxiously fiddling with your belt, thinking about the gun in your waistband. She's deceiving you with honeyed words and unassuming appearance; who the fuck knows, maybe the cat is manipulating you too. Throwing up would be the calmest reaction you could have right now, because the thoughts in your head started going at each other's throats and doubting in this situation could get you killed. Thoughts like, fuck her, her cozy house with purple witchy twitchy girl interior, and her affectionate black cat she mentioned she rescued when nobody would because of superstitions—you curse in your head, you're not actually upset at her although you do not let your guard down, you're upset at yourself for being so easily coaxed into trusting her, it's all too easy, and it is intimidating you.

You're pretty sure you're gonna rip your vocal cords out of frustration and an overall feeling of overwhelmingness; everything seems to piss you off today, even more than usual. How are you good?! All bright and beaming with nothing but positivity. You're not supposed to be good! I have believed all my life you aren't!..are you like me too? A thing that should not be? Before breaking down and crying about your situation, and if you did, she would make you that tea and rub your back with her hand that radiated ease and made you slump your shoulders with relief.

Before you get other fun thoughts like Am I on the wrong side of the war? You start discussing bussiness since you forgot that's what your here for. Even if your eyes water like a little kid after being scolded for something they didn't do, your voice is nowhere near close to sounding like one. You demand a cure, bargaining for a deal to stop the lycanthropy metamorphosis you feel taking over little by little and make you human again. If she can't, you have a gun with silver bullets in your trunk and your will written out, but by now it probably has no significance.

Much to your disappointment, she—Willow—insisted you called her, tells you she cannot take away your curse, but she can soothe it a little, keep it in a cage locked deep into your subconscious. In exchange, she could ask for fucking anything in the world, but she wants loyalty.

"Define, loyalty." You ask through gritted teeth, yeah, that will stop the tears, definitely, great intimidation skills, _____ .

"I'm talking about respect, mutual aid, when it all comes down for me, when I get threatened by a hunter, I want you to be there. I need you to have my back." She admitted, studying your eyes trying to reslove the conflict in them, anything that could give her hope. You couldn't explain this to anyone, ever, Yeah I almost turned into a werewolf once but my witch friend did a ritual on me, so i'm all good now.

Willow is now sitting on an ottoman facing her couch, where you're sitting. Her hands fidget with her bracelets until she clasps them together, and she is leaning towards you. Her gentle tone is imbued with gentle authority that commands her mutual respect without making her overbearing. Keeping steady eye contact, she is discussing serious matters with a serious tone like she should. You can't lie, it catches you off-guard, it herds you in the corner and softly shakes your shoulders, forcing you to listen.

You'd be every synonym in the dictionary for the word 'idiot' if you hadn't accepted this deal. You shake hands, and the warm smile she wears causes a domino effect, making you do the same, even if you had been crying.

It's a funky ritual. She makes you lay on the couch while she lights all sorts of candles; she closes the curtains even though it's already dark so light cannot come in. The only light present is the salt lamp in the far corner and the numeruous lighted candles. She even has to kick Creek out of the room, much to the cat's protests outside the door. They slowly come to a stop as he finds something that's more interesting than whatever ritual his owner is cooking up with a guest—that he feels drawn to for whatever reason. You feel nervous, and she feels nervous too, because you are. Willow reassures you and tells you that after it ends you will pass out for a while, but that's fine because she says you can spend the night if she isn't pushing it.

The celling becomes your newest fascination, and you study every small bump and gray spot in order to distract your mind from... well, thinking. Not for the ritual, but for reassurance, she lies and says you have to hold her hand. Her warm hand against yours seems to punch out of your lungs every doubt whether this will work or not and the sadness your father produced with an unfatherly amount of bluntness and cold parenting that was the verbal equivalent of stabbing your spine and twisting the knife, but you can't pull out the knife, well, you can try, but it will hurt even worse and it will infect spreading yellow or purple marks around it–. She—her hand—has the ability to make you breathe again without feeling like you have leg irons around your neck dragging it down and hands squashing your lungs to bits. She speaks incantations in what you know is latin and instructs you to close your eyes. You swear you hear a candle stop burning in the process—something you can't physically hear, but you had. You can make out a few words (your ears keep ringing and something is happening because you hear her voice; it's distorted and weird, but she told you, strictly, not to open your eyes, so you don't). Words like: lupus-wolf, tollere-take away? You're not sure on that one; that's what three straight days of crying might do to one, mutare- which means change. Okay, that was a nice distraction now what el–

You feel the imprint of a huge dog-like paw pressing into your Adam's apple and cutting off your breath. She obviously takes notice by the way you're writhing and choking and swatting away at nothing—something you're trying to fight even with closed eyes, but there is nothing there. Your palm doesn't make contact with anything. Quickly, Willow chants something you're too busy choking to catch. The pressure on your throat dissolves, and you can breathe again. She calms her own breath and squeezes your hand. When she doesn't feel you squeeze back, she remembers that you're supposed to pass out after the spell. Willow drapes a blanket on you and goes off to order something to eat. When she opens the living room door, Creek doesn't hesitate to run in and settle on your chest. The cat purrs as he patiently waits for you to wake up.

You wake up fifteen minutes later with the smell of food flooding your nostrils, stronger than it has ever been before. It's almost like it's sitting right under your nose. You open your eyes, and the smell has a color, and you can clearly see how it snakes its way in from the kitchen into the half-open door. Your nails feel heavier than usual. This is hopefully a fever dream. But the food isn't here, nor is Willow; you can hear her humming a song in the kitchen, Voodoo Chile by Jimi Hendrix.

The weight of the shadow on your chest brings you back to earth, and you run your hands through his black fur with closed eyes as your head falls back onto the couch. The feeling of fur on your fingertips feeding to your serotonin levels rising. Creek seems to know what it's like to be disowned by your own father and forced to have a fake death in order to 'die' in a way that won't make your mother think you were cursed, or worse, that the whole family is now. Creek notices you're awake and gets off you, but not before making biscuits.

"Thanks, Creek." You mumble before pushing yourself up in a sitting position with a groan.

You can feel the rich, velvety, dark green rug beneath your socks; you would have appreciated it properly if you could actually see the details woven into it. Your eyes keep focusing and unfocusing like they're getting adjusted, and the room doesn't seem so dark anymore. God, how long did you pass out? As you tried to gather your thoughts (if the spell was easy on you enough to actually leave some), memories of the ritual came flooding back—the chanting in latin, the flickering candle(s), the punching smell of herbs, the murder attempt from a wolf spirit/ghost?! who the hell knows anymore? Now you were wide awake, and everything felt different. If it weren't for the fucking ritual that was just performed on you, you would've blamed the faint ringing in your years, shitty eyesight, and banging headache on a terrible hangover or a cold so bad it would make your throat ache for the tea your mom would make you when your immune system failed you. She promised she would teach me how to make it. Your grief echoed to you.

You rub at your temples at thats when you notice why did your nails feel heavier than usual. You had fucking claws, well, not animal claws, but they are honorably elongated and sharper than they had ever been. As you looked up from your lap, your eyes fell on a mirror.

A tall mirror leaning on its back legs, with black edges and details on the rim, you would again appreciate if you had the ability to see a single thing in the distance.

Your eyes widened, mortified, seeing yourself. It looked like one of your parents's worst nightmares. Something out of a dream your mom would have—a nightmare so nasty and vivid she would be forced by her paranoia to get up and check that you're still in bed sleeping soundly.

Your eyes were no longer the familiar color you have seen in the mirror or in old photos of your family members you've grown to love. The shade wasn't even close to yours; crazy how one small change made such a big difference in your appearance. Your pupils were slitted vertically, shrinking only to dilate a little once again, getting adjusted. You slowly got up on foal legs and fell on your knees in front of the mirror. Even if you didn't think it was night because you weren't seeing darkness, the light of the moon shone down on the mirror and floor thanks to the now open curtains. That's when your vision stopped unfocusing and finally cleared.

You were now looking at yourself. It felt incredibly alien and familiar at the same time; you looked at yourself every day, whether it was the mirror in your bathroom at home, a crappy motel one that faced the bed (which you cover up with a scoff each time), or a reflection in the car of your vanity mirror checking yourself before going in a precinct, pretending to be a reporter (the things middle-aged pigs would confess to a doe-eyed girl from the press..).

You gently pulled the corner of your upper lip only to reveal your enlarged and sharpened front canines. Your hand fell and instead went to cover your mouth in order to muffle your sobs. You must have done a horrible job because the second you slapped the hand over your mouth, you heard Willlow gasp as if she felt it too.

She drops the food she was unpacking and runs in, taking a moment to calm her heaving chest in the doorway; her hands were holding it like an earthquake had shaked her up; even her round glasses had slipped and rested on the tip of her nose.

"_______, you woke up!" she exclaims cheerfully. "I was just—how do you fee-?"

She kept stuttering and cutting herself off. Willow didn't need to say anything else; she saw the tears welling up in your eyes and felt the same shock you did from the kitchen.

🧿🧿🧿- later on, you have to bump into the Winchesters one way or another

- and it's exactly on a full moon when this time the ball isn't in your court and you don't get to decide whether you turn or not.

- your claws are sharp, your eyes have changed their original color completely with your pupils vertically slit, and your teeth (conveniently) remain the same; only a few of your front canines are enlarged and sharpened.

- as for senses, it's downright spectacular.

- you can hear deer stepping on tree branches, foxes running, and owls hooting when you're driving by the forest

- you smell how many people are in a room

- you have night vision (yes, your eyes to the flashy thingamajiggy when someone blinds you with their flashlight).

- as a hunter, you already know that your claws and fangs can rip out a human heart.

- ironically, as this whole situation is, you hunt alone on the principle that you don't long for companionship as some lycanthropes do.

- you've turned into a literal killing machine with no instinct to kill, so hunting with others is off the table since at the first sign of a threat (they think you are one, but you really aren't), a hunter exterminates.

- you meet the Winchesters on a ghoul hunt

- you have taken the case before them, but when you couldn't get anywhere with identifying whatever evil being was tormenting the locals with their mere presence, you thought about ditching it since it doesn't look like your type of thing and took the consideration that maybe humans were fucking around this time.

- so when you heard the FBI are in town investigating the case (detective Page and Plant), you placed that town in your rear view mirror; they got it covered..right?

- but something didn't feel right- it wasn't the shame of leaving a case with your tail between your legs (pun intended) with the weak motive, 'Maybe humans are really fucking around this time.'

- something wasn't right, so even if you were tired, you abruptly stopped the car and went over your research spread out on the flat of your closed trunk

- the slits of your eyes dance over the words on your laptop, your papers, and an old lore book you fought tooth and nail for. When you realized it's a ghoul you're dealing with, you turned the car around and went over every speed limit like hellhounds were scratching at your tires. It was your job to not let anybody else get hurt or someone else's grave be violated

- as the light of the moon shined down on you and your wild eyes looked back at you from the rear view mirror, you knew you couldn't have anyone see you, you had to be invisible

- *time skip* (as much as it pains me 'cause i am a sucker for details :))- you swoop in time to save the Winchesters

- and if they weren't tied up, they would've started fighting you too, because why was there a whole ass werewolf fist fighting a ghoul?? John trained them like Spartan warriors, but nothing prepared them for something like this.

- so they sit there like:??????

- they watch you take out a fucking ghoul all by yourself

- the head of the ghoul's person they're impersonating rolls onto the floor. You have to remind yourself it's not a real person; it's an evil spirit who kills to feed

- by the time you wipe the blood off your face, smearing it a bit in the process, and cut the ties holding the hunters loose, Sam is unnable to look away from your slit eyes adorned by a strange color that strangely suits you

- literally hearts in his fawn brown eyes like you still don't have blood on your face and you aren't trying to catch your breath; also, you took a nasty punch to your cheek, and he's pretty sure it's gonna leave a bruise, but he totally doesn't care, why? why do you ask?

- by the way Sam is scrunitizing you, and oh yeah, Sam is scrunitizing you, you're sure you're gonna have to ditch since you've been in this situation before and you know how it always ends

- there was no 'explaining yourself' to hunters when they saw you under the full moon or when they saw you change because you had to.

Before you can even open your mouth they have their methaphorical pitchforks sharpened and torches lit up, prepared to slaughter you, and if you're honest, you can't even blame them for it because you would've done the same.

- Dean rubs his wrist with his right hand; the imprint of the rope is still fresh on his skin like a tattoo. Sam focuses on not choking when you catch him staring.

"Who the hell are you?" Dean thinks out loud. You take a big lungs-exploding sigh and give a shot at introducing yourself since they seem more civilized than most hunters are

- Sam geeks out about you

He doesn't question you because he is suspicious (he has the right to be but surprisingly isn't). He has to feed his noisy, information-hungry brain or he will spontaneously combust

- "Are your senses even more enhanced during the full moon, or are they the same?"

- "Can you smell when somebody is afraid? Like the hormones from their pores?"

- "Is it annoying to always have super hearing? Like has it ever caused you to be..I don't know.. Anxious? It did?" He mourns over you, trying to imagine himself in your situation but possibly can't.

- "I'm really sorry you had to go through a whole..change all by yourself, but it just shows how strong you are, some don't even make it 'til the end."

- After you were done explaining to Sam (to which he gladly sat himself down and listened) how sometimes you genuinely consider you're inevitably going to become what you hunt and how in the beginning you and your senses have butted heads, how you had no idea how to go through it without having panic attacks because the click of a doorknob was sensitive to your hearing like a veteran was scared of fireworks, how you accidentally ripped a motel door off its hinges, a result of you being slightly irritated, still getting acoustumed to your abilities. Dean would go.

"..Do dog whistles work on y–" Before getting an elbow in the ribs by a glaring Sam.

- more shit Dean would ask you for the sake of his own little curiosity

- "Is 'bitch' even more offensive now?"

- "Who do you think would win in a fight? You or Jacob Black?"

- "What do I smell like? Y'know, since you can pick up on scents and alldat."

- Dean calls you Cujo

- It's the one nickname you can get behind, asking him what he thought about the book, and he's like, "Oh, I watched the movie, but i know a little. Sammy used to rattle on and on about his books when he was younger."

- if you think about it, an alais doesn't sound so bad in theory or practice while hunting.

- it's secretive, the boys don't need to divulge your real name, and it's actually high-key kickass (I literally watched Cujo just so I know what I'm talking about, a.k.a. the second reason why it took a millenium and a half for me to post these; the first reason is that i suck)

- Dean is thrilled to get to call you that- he gets this fucking smirk, like a dad about to drop the worst joke ever made on everyone, you and Sam brace yourselves for what's coming with matching eyerolls-

"Let's fuck em' up, Cujo."

- "Cujo, dude, you're just itching to raise a little hell right now, aren't you?"

- "Uh- a bacon cheeseburger, soda, yo, Cujo whaddya want? My treat >:]."

- "Cujo, put on that song you were listening to; I had it in my head the entire hunt." (I didn't mention the genre or artist bc I like to imagine Dean listening to everyone's fav category; ex. I imagine Dean screaming bikini kill lyrics whenever i'm sad)

- if you thought the 'canine/wolf' teasing stopped here, you're so painfully wrong

- Dean made you a mixtape, because that's his love language apparently, with only songs that are about werewolves

- I feel like it took him a longer time to find a suitable title than the songs themselves

- he has all of the possible picks on a piece of paper that stays in the pocket of his fifty pound leather jacket.

- the titles are: Songs to transform into; The howlin' hits; Songs that will make you wag your tail—that one is crossed out because he knows you will make him eat the tape if he does settle on it; Love at first bite; and finally the one he settled for is Songs you can sink your teeth into. Dean smiled at his work, it didn't feel like a prank anymore it was more like a gift and he didn't feel any ugly emotion or insecurity try to pull him back into not getting attached to you.

The final touch was a note saying

"Hey, Cujo, thought you might want these howlin' hits whenever you need to tune the world out.

P.S. : Sam told me to add one of the songs, it's that punk stuff you like - Dean"

- The songs he prudently picked out are these : Of Wolf and Man by Metallica; Bark at the Moon by Ozzy Osbourne; I Was A Teenage Werewolf by The Cramps; Wolf Moon by Type O Negative; Witch Wolf by STYX; Run with the Wolf by Rainbow; Lycanthropy by G.B.H and others.

- you accidentally made a kid cry once- a ball was literally flying towards you and you caught it just in time, thanks to your reflexes

- instinctively, you turned around in time and caught the ball as your claws grew and sank into the inanimate object

- it's all "Nice relfexes, _____" praise from Dean and proud and shy smiles from Sam until the owner of the ball starts sobbing in front of you

- it's a kid, a boy with red hair, no older than six years of age

- but we all know Dean's charm is basically made for this

- so he handles both the kid and his mom (flirting with a milf all day, poor Dean)

- you keep apologizing to the kid and the mom, but Dean just waves you off; you don't understand his generosity until Sam tells you that you accidentally secured Dean's hookup for tonight.

- Since Dean is not coming, not until early morning, nor is he there to call you and Sam 'dorks', you and his younger brother take advantage of it.

- you guys have a movie night with the most random movies ever

- it is chaotic

- from rom-coms you switch to a world war II documentary, then you watch re-runs of House MD on tv.

- Dean stumbles in at like five something a.m. and takes a picture of you and Sam snuggling under a blanket while the tv light casts shadows of orange and cold colors on your defenseless expressions.

- but can somebody actually blame you? Or Sam, for that matter?

- honorably want to mention your body heat is also enhanced

- You and Sam were sitting with your sides pressed into each other

- you were radiating pure furnace body heat, how could he not be sleepy??

- but that's not the only reason Sam knocks out so heavily

- it's you he's sitting down with (relaxing for once in his life) watching a ridiculous episode of House with thirteen ads rolling every ten minutes accompanied by lazy talking as if you're not debating books only you and morally grey forty-year-olds read (where that Kansas drawl of his is much more audible and pretty), after a marathon of fatally random movies

- younger Sam who had trouble going to sleep/getting some shut-eye because Dean and John are out late on a hunt.

- Sam especially couldn't fall asleep because Dean wasn't there

- it was a different story when Dean was at the age where he couldn't hunt but he could use a pistol and take care of his little brother

- both of them in a relatively warm motel room, alone (since John fucked off to god-knows-where, to hunt a monster they are never to breathe in the direction of as a conversation subject.)

- little Sammy (age where he believed nothing could beat his older brother) could peacefully fall asleep knowing Dean stays up and watches over him like a hawke, reading comic books by the tv light

- where little Dean keeps chanting in his head what Sammy is supposed to do after eating his dinner.

- Watch tv or look at the comic with me (Sammy can't read yet), brush his teeth, then tuck him in bed.

- now pre-teen Sam can hardly sleep

- he is plagued/tormented by flashing images his overthinking big brain mades of a thousand situations where his family got hurt, if not even killed

- Sam's grip on the shotgun is shaking; it shakes even harder when John's bark booms over his shoulder, right into his ear.

- "Sammy, dammit, what are you going to do when a demon breaks through the door and me and your brother aren't there to protect you?!"

- but Sam isn't twelve anymore

- he's a responsible adult

- snuggled beside you and denying any eepy allegations you decide to accuse him of

- so, the heat you contribute, the soft speaking on the tv, the darkness of the room, you being there is enough to lull Sam to sleep

- studies show you feel sleepy around the people you trust ;)

- the position you two fell asleep in cannot be described in any other word than childish

- somehow you would catch two kids, sleeping over at one of the other's houses, knocked out, and snoring in the same bed after watching a horror movie

- on one of the two queens the motel room contributes (the one closest to the tv) you and Sam have made this fluffy nest full of pillows, a huge blanket, plus a random quilt Bobby pulled out of thin air and gave it to you when he heard you complaining about the petal-thin blankets motels have during cold ass weather.

- When you both lied down on the bed with your legs greedily streched out, backs pressed against the headboard, and your head is resting on the wall while Sam, magically, was still able to hold his up after the very long day all of you endured. You predicted one of you wouldn't survive being in each other's presence and make it out not asleep, and god, you hoped it was you.

- Sam's breathing slows down after a while of comfortable silence, and you’re sure he's dying until you spare one quick glance and see him, downright snoozing with his lips parted without a care in the world, ghosts and eerie phenomenons weren't bothering or needing him now.

- during all of the movies and documentary and fuckin lazy intellectual commentary nobody else would have the patience to discuss with you or Sam, he somehow migrated on the bed/nest with his side flush against yours, like a magnet to another; it was inevitable not to stick together, literally.

- your shoulder was now pressed into his forearm, your head no longer resting uncomfortably, and his temple is resting on the top of your head.

- but (unfortunately) you weren't hugging or anything- like a mirror or a copycat, Sam has his arms crossed, just like you, so maybe that's why you didn't wake up full on cuddling, that does sound good though your brain mourns

- When you do wake up, the only slight change you notice is that you're sleeping on your side..so is Sam. You're facing Sam's neck and chin, and up close and personal, you can actually count the too-sexy amount of moles he modestly posesses. His arm serves the role of a pillow underneath his head, and the other is resting with his palm down facing the mattress.

- with Sam taking up the entire attention of your senses, it takes an emmbarassing while for you to hear the shower running, Dean; did he see you both like this? Was he going to mention it? Your gut fills with a small dose of embarrassement, preparing you for what's yet to come, and it protests at that.

- much displeasure from your senses to your brain and your heart that wanted to breathe Sam in more as he (hopefully) breathes you out, you turn on your other side, unconsciously careful not to disturb Clifford over here, and you try to determine what time it is from your surroundings alone.

- the light blue sneaking its way through the dark closed curtains and the slight chill in the air points all arrows to seven or eight in the morning, you could go back to sleep.

- Dean wasn't just feeling gracious; he didn't and wasn't even planning on sparing you or Sam

- that day, when he separately gets the both of you alone, he has the exact same conversation with different but not so different people.

-"You should've seen the two of you this morning when I came in, two kittens snoring together, it was fuckin' adorable." Dean teased–

—Monday, 13:34 p.m. — as he tossed his clothes into one of the laundromat's washing machines, making Sam paralyze in his seat as his fingers started fidgeting with the edges of his hoodie.

"You did?.." He inquires, not knowing what exactly Dean saw just this morning. Sam only woke up a little after you went back to sleep. He swore his cheek must have burned a hole through the pillow with how hard he was blushing. You were so close. There was a good distance between the edge of the bed and you. So your back was flush against his chest. If you're wondering where his arm went, it was around your waist. Sam—your own personal seatbelt. He probably thinks it's his fault too. Dean never ceased to describe Sam as a 'cuddlebug'.

"Uh-huh" Dean hums a confirmation, acting casual, scarily casual. Sam feels the teasing in Dean's tone; it's there, but Dean is not fully teasing yet, like he wants Sam to confess something first after boiling in his embarrassement for long enough.

—Monday, 20:02 p.m. — as he pulled the Impala into the driveway of a fast-food place you were so invested in you even forgot the name of; you froze and looked at him, searching for any emotion that might give him away, but Dean was a brick wall, a slight very Dean siginificant parted lips smirk paired with squinted eyes over the wheel, carefully driving into the driveway. Even the car seemed to betray you in your moment of weakness because you swear the volume is lower than it was a few seconds ago. Ozzy Osbourne's laugh can still be heard from the speakers, even if it's barely audible over your racing thoughts or your hearing trying its hardest to pick up on Dean's thoughts. The rythym of the drums seems to sync up with your heartbeat, or the other way around, you're not sure. Over every little sound, there still seems to be a little silence to fit in. You swallow a lump in your throat.

"..We had a movie night, we just fell asleep like that, that's all." You mumble, and Dean starts to feel a little bad for letting you be a victim to his spotlight-teasing and giving you no shade to reprieve to or show his undying approval.

Somehow, you still worry if Dean believes you have ruined the dynamic, and now he's cornering you to tell you to stop it or something (overthinking anxiety worms are eating away at your critical thinking skills). You just worry about what he thinks of this. You still worry about the Dean who doesn't correct random people on cases who mistake you and Sam for a couple; the Dean who just has to leave some arsenal or luggage in the front, just so you are forced to share the backseat with Sam; the Dean who always has to group you and Sam in a category when he teases you both (Geeks, nerds, smartasses, etc.). Cupid works hard, but Dean Winchester works harder.

"Hey-, Cuj- Doll." Dean sputters, switching glances between you and the wheel.

This didn't go as he planned it would, and now he is facing the consequences. The way you shrink in your seat and the way you avoid catching his eye makes Dean feel like a douchebag. If he didn't know any better he would thinks he is, but then you would actually be able to read him like a book and tell him otherwise. You hear the desperation in his voice; your candle of hope comes back to life and lights up. Your head turns to look at him with pleading eyes. Please don't be angry, please don't kick me to the curb, let me stay in the backseat a little more. Dean lets out a shaky exhale that turns into a laugh; he runs a hand down his face. You've watched him do that every time he got jumpscared by the monthly spirit with unfinished business. It was something you imagined Dean picked up from John, the picture in your head so clear (at least from the pictures you saw)— a tired dad in an old squeaky motel chair with a whiskey glass in his hand doing the same motion Dean was doing right now. Dean would mimic his father's gestures to try to look more like him; he didn't have his brunette curly hair, his dark brown eyes, Sam did.

Dean never had his voice either; he only perfected his bark to match his dad's. Sam hated the way his reflection resembled his father, Dean was either jealous of him for it or couldn't wrap his head around as to why his brother hated being their dad, probably the latter. Dad, at least in Dean's eyes, was a hero, a figure to be admired and emulated. But Sam? He didn't even have to try. Sam and John were so alike that they clashed constantly like two stubborn stags locking antlers in a duel.

"..Dean?" You call him out; you had no idea what was going on in his head; it would be pretty damn nice if you could know. Dean shots his head up at the mention of his name.

"Yeah?—sorry, I just, you and Sam are just so—" He sighs. "it's about time you two crazy kids broke that touch barrier." He guffaws, slowly pulling up to the ordering kiosk.

A new song starts playing on Dean's "hot summa' nights driving" mixtape, Emmit Remmus by The Red Hot Chili Peppers, he added it when Sam said that's one of his favorites.

- do I need to talk about how much of an immense help you have been on hunts?

- you don't need to help out on every hunt despite Sam's disappointment and Dean's kid-like joy to have their friend help them out who is a professional/werewolf/hunter/geek, who kind of gets his references?? But you are geniunely so good it's funny to have the boys call you up and be like "..so we need help". They're happy you'll show up but there is still that lick of shame that taunts the Winchesters whenever they are forced to call for aid.

- this one time, you wanted to hug them after not seeing them for two weeks, and when you went to attack Sam, you heard his bones crack.

- your strength still surprises you and knocks other people off their feet

- it was so loud (atleast for you), you were sure you broke something

- Sam did nothing but give you his (killer) dimply smile and reassure you didn't do anything (even if he slightly grunted); while Dean whined like a kid saying (lying) he doesn't want a hug (you coaxed him into it eventually)

- Sam feels like he's not allowed to call you by your nickname, like he fears it's Dean's thing and not his

- so when he finally puts on his big boy pants, he's like, "Uhh–Cujo- 🧍‍♂️so get this.."

- all red and shy, trying to act casual, as if he doesn't wonder about the reaction you might have if he calls you other nicknames, like honey, sweetheart, even baby, or if he had the excuse to hold your hand, how would you hold it? Fingers interlocked or palms flat?

- Sam would also love to just marvel at your slit eyes; if he could he would take a picture and put it in his wallet; don't get me wrong if he had one where you were normal, he would cherish it just as much.

- Sam thinks your nickname is actually really cool (probably because it's a Stephen King reference, nerd), and you take that as a compliment. Sam is hard to entertain or please by his brother's antics.

- But he prefers saying your name

- there's something so intimate about the syllables rolling off his tongue so easily

- "_____, Are you okay? What is it? The soundproof earmuffs? I'll go get them." When everything, and I mean when every sound is just too much.

- Sam got them for you; he couldn't handle seeing you wince one more time whenever a car with a bad engine would pass by the motel (during a stressful hunt); its tires squealing under the concrete, making a faint sound for the boys, but for you so much louder.

- you know how pathethic it is to be affected by such small things when you're blessed with such powers? How can you call yourself a hunter when decibels, frequencies, and fucking tire squeals make you their bitch? You wish you could train yourself in a way that would make you less sensitive to certain sounds. It just adds to the reasons why hunters have the excuse or classify you as "the frail one" not only because you're a girl. When you used to hunt with your dad and sometimes mom, the amount of dog-shit comments from other hunters who had sons, were nothing but mysogynistic, curlish, and ruthless. "Are you sure the riffle isn't too heavy?", "Does she even know how to kill this thing?", "She's going to drag us down, do you want us to die?"— the type of comments that would make your dad shoot daggers into them, defend you "She's a goddamn ______, what do you think?", and whisper into your ear "Show em' what you're made of." and you would (stubbornly) listen to his advice to the damn letter after you almost mouthed them off.

Your dad believed in "Actions are sometimes louder than words." and all that adult crap, you were not as zen.

Your mom actually encouraged the sarcasm you have replied with in the past. The funniest memory your mother can recall is a story she tells at every gathering and every chance she gets to everyone, she praised you like crazy. When another hunter's son had the nerve to fuck with a twelve-year-old you. "Aren't you afraid of breaking a nail out there?" The boy sneered, puffing out his chest like a peacock. You stared at him with pure disbelief. "The only way I'm breaking a nail tonight is by kicking your ass, you cocky brainless jerk." You spat back, your mother and father were there and so was the boy's father; the gravity of the situation was on your shoulders, and their stares felt even heavier in comparison; intimidating him was 100% on the table. You felt like everyone had the same exact thought occuring them, an unspoken demand passed everyone there, even you: Do something. And you did. Your mother's jaw went slack; she doubled over, gripping whatever surface was near her and she started to chortle, with her shoulders shaking like never before. Your father was holding in a chuckle while massaging the bridge of his nose.

- Sam has to disagree with you whenever you complain about how your senses make you look or about the way you underestimate yourself. "What?! You can't be serious. _____, It doesn't mean you're weak. In fact, it makes you even more interesting. Everyone has an Achilles heel; yours is stronger because you're an amazing hunter who figured a way out. It makes you even stronger, I have no idea how you deal with this crap! Dean and I would've gone insane if we were in your shoes for more than a day."

- he is also forcing back his infamous (spectacular) bitchface

- he doesn't 'hold back' actually

- he geniunely cannot glare at you, not when you're like this. He can make a few exceptions, like when you join in Dean's teasing/joking (the silly rambunctious energy Dean carries around had, unfortunately, contiminated you or awakened yours)

- or when you start teasing Sam yourself, he shoots you a glare that classifies as nothing but hot (in your book at least), the kind of Sam glare that makes you flush knowing he doesn't mean it at all.

- Dean making you those fake ass I.D's like "Joan Jett", "Stevie Nicks", "Kathleen Hanna" and when you asked him to make more subtle ones he was like, bet. "Kelly Hammer", "Diana Bowie", "Laura Ulrich".

a/n: I wanted to apologize again for taking so long and for the unnecessary amount of context that literally nobody asked for. Uhh yeah and feedback would be very much appreciated<3, sava out *mic drop*

[yourstingrey]

do you think you could write a luke x y/n friends to lovers based on too sweet by hozier? Maybe have it be a little angsty like someone tells him he’s not good enough and so he distances himself. I really love your writing and feel like you would write it beautifully.

Too Sweet Pt.1

Thank you so much for this request I loved this idea its so cutie im so sorry it took so long for me to make but hopefully Ive done it justice this one is a bit short but I kinda reallyyyyy wanted to put it into separate parts (which i swear wont take as long but it will be longer cus i gotta get that juicy angst in better!!!)

Hot.

That's all I felt as I was training, That's all I ever feel when I train with Luke. Not because he’s insanely hot himself but he has to put his all into everything even if I ask for practice with sparing. I'm crouched down a bit less like a fighter's stance as Luke has already got me winded but I try to hold up my tough gaze as he stands in front of me mirroring my stance except he's not tired at all it looks like he has even lifted a finger but this is our third go and unsurprisingly he's won every time so far. “Y/N/N are you sure you don't wanna give up? I'm not sure I can watch your face get all sad when you lose again.” He’s smirking as he talks and for a second he puts his hand on his chest to fain sadness about me. In that split second, I take the opportunity to try to tackle him to the ground. 

He lets out a surprised Oof before he hits the ground I try to grab his hands to pin them down “I'm not so sure Luke I think you be pulling your sore loser face” Of course I didn't learn from Luke as my talking got me too distracted as Luke flips us over and now he's pinning me down into the dirt. He simply smirks and does a little tilt of his head pretty much signaling id lost. He stood before holding out his hand for me to get up which I gladly took from him. “Luke, I asked for practice. I thought you were going to go a little easy… I'm gonna have to sleep early or I'm gonna be so sore.”  Discomfort on my face as I brush the dirt off my shorts and shirt “About that…” Luke says with a certain tone I've learned means ‘I'm gonna try really hard to convince you to do something you're really not gonna wanna do’ “Oh god what is it, Luke…?” A mischievous look spread across his face “Apollo kids are having a small lake party tonight and I was thinking I could take you” I let out a taut laugh before squinting my eyes playfully at him “Weren't you already out partying last night! Chris was telling me all about it!” I watched his face flush a bit as he stood there watching me talk before stammering his words “Wait- when did you see Chris today I wasn't with you??” I narrow my eyes at him a bit “This morning I went on a walk and I ran into him yknow you're not denying it soooo i'm right you did go out…?”

He gets up from leaning against a pillar to come put his arm around my shoulders and start walking out of the arena “Well yes.. But! I wasn't hanging out with my best friend so that's why I'm telling you that you gotta come out this time!” 

“Luke you're always out so much lately don't you think YOU especially should rest, oh so great swordsman!” I clasp my hands to my chest whilst looking up through my lashes at him. He lets out something between a laugh and a scoff “You know that I do this all the time you're the one who always stays cooped inside her cabin almost all day usually!” Our steps absentmindedly got slower as we approached my cabin “I don't know Luke… I promised I was going to hang out with my siblings tomorrow and if I party with you I might forget or sleep in'' He opened his mouth to rebuttal me but I quickly cut him off “And andddd! You know I don't like to drink. I'm too nervous about being caught!” 

We finally got to my cabin but I stood outside because I knew Luke wouldn't be satisfied unless I let him try to convince me one last time. “For one, You see your siblings every day you live with them. Plus I know some of your siblings are coming tonight anyway!” I go to open my mouth ready to shut him down already but before I had the chance Luke swiftly made sure to playfully cover my mouth with his hand before tsking at me and putting his finger to his lips shushing me “Ahem as I was saying YN, I'll be with you the whole time you can rely on me the whole time, just go this once for me and if you hate it I'll never force you to come again!” 

He lowered his hand from his mouth to reveal my lips in an exaggerated frown. He let out a loud laugh before huffing out what sounded like ‘Oh c'mon now’ but it fell on deaf ears as his fingers went to my sides to get me to let out a laugh (well more than just one) I laughed so hard at his relentless tickles hunching myself onto him before we heard the laughs of my sibling behind and Luke turned back into a stoic statue practically I let my laughter die awkwardly as he separated from me. Rocking back and forth on my heels I look back at him “Well okay I guess I'll think about it… but this isn't a yes okay!!” He let out a small chuckle before slowly starting to walk backwards “I’ll see you later tonight” he flipped around completely to start walking away I let out a small laugh turning away to walk to my cabin door before something dawned on me, I flip around and yell back out to him “Wait Luke how will I know where to go!!” He turns back to me putting his hands behind his head with a sort of arrogant smirk on his face 

“Don't worry about it, I am a messenger aren't I?” 

[sugar-omi]

On the topic of moisturizing our ocean boy's lips... May I add a lil' idea on how making things easier...?

First: apply a very generous amount of your fav lipbalm on your lips.

Second: lightly tap the corner of your mouth with your index with an innocent smile and say "Cove, it's lipcare time, baby".

Third: Indulge and enjoy.

Somehow, I've got the feeling that Cove would be a real threat to MC's scented lipbalms/lipsticks/lipglosses. You know, like when you can't help but eat your lipstick once applied, because it's tasty and it becomes a habbit you absent-mindedly do...? Well, I kinda hc him doing the same, but to MC's lips.

I think it'd even reach a point where MC'd have a stack of lipsticks/balms only for his personal use (on MC's mouth). Pricey lipsticks would be worn only when sure he'd not be around. And i think he might pout and feel "cheated" if MC would ever dare wearing one of those long-lasting lipsticks (because he enjoys having you apply, re apply and re-re apply your gloss, so he can have seconds, thirds, as much as he wants, MC's mouth literally becomes Free Dessert Buffet to him).

Downside of it... your make up budget might explode, with how fast those lipsticks and balms are finished.

There's this french brand which sells this absolutely delicious lipbalm made with honey. You literally wanna scoop it from the bottle and eat it. Also, it's the kind of really rich and thick, blanket-like texture you'd apply before sleep. So if MC ever uses it... they'd probably have to either try keeping Cove away from their lips (at least enough time for the product to do its job on their lips), or benevolently sharing (cause it's caring), or resign to plan their lip moisturizing routine another day... or hide while doing it.

I think lipsticks/balms would end up being one of the most fav items Cove would gift them...

Sorry, I went a bit overboard with the topic... 😅

Rambling anon -

THIS IS SO GOOD

MC putting on one of their nicer lipsticks/glosses, or putting a lotta time/effort into their lips and limiting cove to 1 or 2 pecks. PECKS. not kisses. PECKS.

cove is pouting, his distraught... he just wants to kiss you, your lips look so nice n juicy n shiny and-

he needs his fix.

definitely make him buy some if not all your lip products. if he wants to keep kissing you silly, wants to keep smudging your lipstick/gloss n making it so obvious what you were just up to, then he needs to pay for it!!!!

imagine giving him a lil peck, and then it turns to 3, than 5, and now you're just kissing... your lip is totally ruined, lipstick n carefully lined lips totally smudged.

don't ask if he's proud of himself because he'll just laugh n rub his arm. or maybe he's just looking at you all love-drunk. doesn't care about all the lipstick staining his lips... hopefully no one walks around the corner this time

liz did once, n she does not let you live in it down... specifically cove. always teasing him with, "cove, theres lipstick on your chin" and snickering hysterically when he slaps a hand over his mouth n chin, trying to wipe off the "lipstick"

(she did it once, being totally serious, and cove was like "im not falling for that again >:(" and went to work with your lipstick on his lips...)

yall definitely lip makeup wipes n a compact mirror on hand at this point...

[cutecurly-hair]

Hearts Unleashed (Part 5)

Pairing: Nick Nelson x Black!fem!reader

Warning: Fluff, Smut, Body Shaming

Words: 5,738

The weekend flew by, and before I knew it, Monday had arrived with its usual speed. I found myself back in the same classroom, at the same place and time, but something felt a little different. Nick and I had been texting non-stop over the weekend. It was just casual conversation, nothing special, but for some reason, it made me inexplicably happy.

I noticed a bunch of curly black hair in front of me. Charlie and I hadn't talked since that day. I sent him a bunch of texts, but he didn't reply. I checked with Ellie and Tao, and they hadn't heard from him either. It wasn't just me he was avoiding; it seemed like he was avoiding everyone.

Interrupting my thoughts, Nick said, "This is Nellie," showing me a picture of his dog, and she was the cutest thing in the world.

"Oh, my god, she's so cute! I've always wanted to have a pet, but ever since our cat died when I was little, we just never got a new one," I said, a tinge of sadness in my voice.

Nick's brows furrowed in concern, a cute little habit that I couldn't help but notice when he was puzzled or concerned about something. "You know, maybe you should come round to my house and meet her. Plus, my mom has been bugging me to invite you over" he suggested. I couldn't contain the smile that spread across my face, I don't know if it was because of Nick's mom has been asking about me or Nick inviting me to his house.

"Are you free on Saturday?" he asked hopefully, his brown eyes searching mine.

"Yeah, I think so," I replied, feeling a flutter in my stomach.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

"Charlie! Charlie! Wait up!" I yelled across the bustling school hallway, dodging through students those rugby drills are finally proving some use.

Finally catching up to him, I took a moment to catch my breath. "What happened with you? I've been calling and texting you. I was even this close to coming to your house to make sure you were alive," I said, demonstrating the minuscule gap between my thumb and forefinger to prove my point.

Charlie turned to me, his face a mix of surprise and sheepishness. "Sorry, I've been dealing with some stuff, and I needed a bit of space. Didn't mean to worry you."

I crossed my arms, trying to hide my concern behind a facade of annoyance. "A simple 'I need space' text would have sufficed, you know."

He scratched his head, a nervous grin appearing on his face. "Yeah, I know. I'll keep you in the loop next time. Promise."

As we walked, the tension melted away, and our usual banter resumed. Charlie might not be telling me everything, but our friendship stayed solid, thankfully.

"Ugh, I've got a ton to catch you up on," I exclaimed, pulling him into a tight hug. His laughter filled the air. "Do I detect some juicy gossip?" he teased, a cheeky grin spreading across his face. Even though I haven't talked with him for a couple of days, I still couldn't help but miss him. I had every right to be mad, but I knew deep down Charlie was keeping something from me, but it was within his right to tell me when he is ready.

"Oh, you have no idea," I replied, joining in the laughter.

"You look fine, sweetheart," my mother remarked as she emerged from the archway. She must have noticed my tenth attempt at fixing my hair and the frustrated sigh that accompanied it. Admittedly, I may or may not have put on a little makeup. Sensing my mom's curious gaze, I decided to address it before she could.

"I'm going to a friend's house. I'll be back around 5," I informed her, trying to keep it casual.

"Are you heading over to Charlie's?"

I hesitated for a moment, then replied, "Um, no, his name is Nick," hoping my response would slip past without her catching the name. My mother, sensing something, walked over to me and handed me my coat and gloves, well aware of my tendency to get cold easily. I was honestly not made for cold weather.

"Is this a boy from school? You know how I feel about you going to somebody's house," she probed, hinting at her concerns. I knew I had to choose my words carefully to navigate this conversation if I wanted to be allowed to leave the house.

"He's my classmate in English. I want him to look over my paper that's due next week," I lied, maintaining a calm tone and hoping she wouldn't see through the deception.

"You've never needed help with your papers before. You're really good at writing," she remarked, clearly skeptical of my story.

"This paper is 50% of my grade. I have to do well on it," I asserted, emphasizing the importance of the assignment and knowing that grades were a language my mother understood well. Having dealt with her expectations back home, I knew I had to convince her to let me go.

She looked pleasantly surprised. "Yes, you're right. Grades are important. I'm surprised I didn't have to remind you," she smiled, genuinely pleased to see me showing concern for my academic performance. Seizing the moment, I quickly put on my coat and gloves, ready to head out the door.

"Come back in time for dinner!" she yelled as I walked away. I gave a quick nod to show I heard and hurried off before she could ask more questions.

My hands were practically freezing, despite the gloves doing a lousy job of keeping the cold out. I stubbornly kept them on, pulled my coat tighter, and power-walked down the street. The bone-chilling London winter seemed to pierce right through me, making me pick up the pace even more.

I stood there for a moment, torn between knocking and ringing the doorbell. My indecisiveness was playing its usual tricks on me. But before I could finally decide, the door swung open. There was Nick, giving me a gentle smile.

"Hey," he greeted. It was kinda unexpected to see him so chill and casual, a side of him I hadn't really seen beyond the school environment.

"Hey," I smiled back, deciding to ditch my gloves that weren't doing much to fight off the cold anyway.

Nick made a gesture towards a delightful chocolate and white mix Border Collie. "Uh... this is Nellie."

"Hey, Nellie. You're so adorable," Reaching down to pet the dog behind its ears. The warmth of Nellie's fur against my hand brought an unexpected comfort, making the chilly weather outside seem momentarily forgotten.

"Did you do something with your hair?" he asked, his eyes locked onto my puff ponytail that had consumed a good chunk of my morning. Lately, I'd been experimenting with new hairstyles, breaking away from my usual braids.

I immediately reached up to touch my hair, a hint of worry crossing my face. "Wait, is it bad?"

He shook his head without hesitation, offering a reassuring grin. "No, you look… it looks great." His compliment made me feel like the effort I put into styling my hair that morning was totally worth it.

"Okay, you better come in before Nellie thinks we're going for a walk," he said, his eyes lingering on mine for a moment longer than necessary.

"Okay"

Walking into his house, I couldn't help but notice how incredibly homey it was. The place just radiated coziness, making it clear that it wasn't just a house; it was a warm and welcoming home. Definitely nothing compared to mine, my house was just cold and empty still filled with boxes. I noticed a few portraits on the wall, nowhere really of his dad. Which I have nothing to brag since my parents have been divorce.

He led me upstairs to his bedroom, which I couldn't help but feel uneasy, like it was way to personal...like I shouldn't be here. But as soon as I saw his room it was very clean...? Definitely not what I was expecting.

Nick saw the look on my face "What? What's wrong?" he asked looking around confused. I couldn't help but chuckle, breaking a smile "It's so clean in here...it's weird," But overall, it suits him with the rugby poster littered all over the walls with a cute little light hanging over his bed. There it was again, that small hint of vanilla, smoke and a mix of musk but the musk was a lot stronger.

Dramatically, he placed his hand over his chest, gasping, "Are you seriously thinking that I am weird because I know how to clean,"

"I just never expected something like this," I said, gesturing to the room. Walking around, I noticed a few books on the shelf. "Especially for a rugby player. I mean, aren't you guys supposed to be dirty, by default?" I picked a book off the shelf, the title reading "Le Petit Prince (French Edition)."

A French Novel?

Sensing my curiosity, Nick blushed, swiftly taking the book from my hand and putting it back on the shelf. "My dad gifted it to me, but I barely read it," he admitted, a touch of embarrassment in his expression.

Sensenig that his dad was a sour subject I decided to drop it. Still observing his room, noticing the little trinkets of action figure and posters, until my eyes landing on the little snacks on the TV stand plus Mario Kart next to the Nintendo, excitement bubbled up within me as I took in the familiar sight.

"You have Mario Kart!" I exclaimed, my eyes lighting up at the sight of the game. Memories of playing it flooded back.

Nick's eyes beamed. "You like Mario Kart? Do you know how to play?" he asked, a playful smile on his face.

I nodded. "Me and my Dad used to play all the time when I was little. I still do, just never really picked it back up," I said, shrugging.

"Do you want to play?" he asked, holding the Nintendo playfully.

I smiled. "You don't even have to ask."

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

"Come on, Come on I'm in the lead! Can you just let me win" Nick yelled, he was particularly begging at the point.

"It doesn't matter cause you're not going to win," I smirked. He's literally the King of Rugby and practically wins at everything. This is one thing I'm really good at, so I am definitely not going to let him win.

"Can you let me win one time? You've won five or six games."

"I am literary going easy one you,"

"No!" he groaned at the screen when he saw my Princess Peach cross the finish line. I couldn't help but laugh at his reaction.

"You need more practice, Nick. Maybe I can give you some tips," I teased, reveling in the playful banter. It was one area where I knew I could outshine the rugby star.

He pouted, "I don't need tips. I just need a fair chance." The adorable pout he sported was enough to make anyone's heart melt.

"I think this is just Karma kicking you in the ass; you can't be good at everything," I said sarcastically, while grabbing a little popcorn.

He nodded in agreement, "No, you're exactly right. You're just good at everything," he admitted.

"No, I'm not," I chuckled. But there was something in the way he looked at me, and it's been happening a lot lately. I can't quite figure out why he has this knack for making me feel this way. It's as if a single glance from him is all it takes to turn me into a bundle of nerves.

"You are. You're a proper little nerd. And you don't even know it."

"I am not!" I protested, playfully nudging him.

"Let's see. You're good at video games. Literally all school subjects, but especially math's. Amazing at photography. Befriending dogs, and you are good a sports manager. Like I have never seen our gear so clean before-"

"Shut up!" I interrupted in a playful groan, feeling warm flush spread across my cheeks. Covering his mouth, while pushing him onto the bed. It seems this was the only way of shutting him up.

"You know it's true," he mumbled from beneath my hand, a blush coloring his cheeks. "Get off me. Seriously, get off," he added with a laugh, the room filled with our shared laughter.

The laughter quickly faded, leaving a lingering warmth between us. I don’t understand this feeling, I have never felt this way before. Our eyes were saying one thing, but our bodies were saying another. In that stillness, I became aware of the soft sound of snow falling outside.

"Oh, my god" I was star-stuck looking out the window.

His eyes followed mine, and as he turned to the window, a quiet gasp escaped his lips.

"It's snowing."

We just look at each other we didn't have to say anything, we jumped up from the bed, rushing down the stairs putting our coats on. The air was charged with anticipation, I was on the brink of witnessing snow for the very first time in my fifteen years. Nick handing me a hoodie in the process.

I shook my head refusing the offer, but he only shoved it back in my face,

"You were freezing when I first saw you this morning," he chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes. But he wasn't taking no for an answer.

I couldn't help but laugh, realizing he had a point. Gratefully accepting the hoodie, I slipped it on, feeling the warmth envelop me trying to ignore his overwhelming scent.

"It's a bit big," you said, glancing at the blue fabric draping down to my knees.

"It looks good on you," he said breathlessly, he was looking directly at me. Two compliments in one day, that was definitely something.

It was absolutely beautiful outside, the cold didn't bother me as much as before, it may or may not have something to do with the hoodie I was wearing.

Nick wasted no time sticking his tongue out to catch the tiny snowflakes. His cheeks had a rosy flush, and there was something about the way the light hit his hair, making it look a bit browner. He looked marvelous.

Caught staring, I locked eyes with him, and there was a fleeting smile on his face. Before I could fully process it, he playfully threw a whole snowball at me, leaving me in disbelief. I hurriedly made a makeshift snowball. It instantly became a snowball fight.

For a moment, just a moment everything seemed perfect, the way he laughed when Nellie was eating the snow. To when he brushed the snow off my hair. The way he took pictures of me when I made snow angles. When he laid beside me all I did was listen to him talk any and everything.

It was just perfect.

I couldn't shake the knot in my stomach, and suddenly, those stolen glances and shared moments held a new weight. When he looks at me, it's like he's seeing something beyond the surface. There's this intensity in his gaze, and I can't help but admire the way he looks at me. The way his eyes light up when he smiles, the little expressions that make him uniquely him. The realization hit me -

I have a crush on Nick Nelson

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

"Are you even listening to what I'm saying?" Ellie snapped her fingers in front of my face, trying to grab my attention. My eyes, however, were glued to the three little bubbles dancing across my screen, eagerly awaiting Nick's response.

Ellie couldn't resist taking a peek at my screen, and a knowing smirk crept onto her face as she shook her head. "Oh, I see what's got you all distracted now."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm listening," I mumbled, tearing my eyes away from the screen to meet Ellie's amused gaze.

She chuckled, leaning back in her chair. "Nick, huh? The mystery guy who's got you glued to your phone?"

Blushing, I tried to downplay it. "We're just chatting, you know, about random stuff."

"Random stuff, right," Ellie teased, wiggling her eyebrows. "I've seen that look before. You've got the 'crush glow' all over your face."

Rolling my eyes, I shrugged. "Oh, come on. It's not like that. We're just friends."

Eyebrow raised; Ellie smirked. "Friends who text 24/7, interesting definition of friendship."

I sighed, realizing she saw through my attempt at nonchalance. "Okay, fine. Maybe there's a tiny crush. But seriously, don't make it a big deal."

Glancing out the window, I spotted Nick chatting with a pretty girl that I always seen around school. They were standing so close, and her laughter reached my ears even through the closed window. My heart sank as I watched them share a moment. She was effortlessly charming and ever so pretty, and the way Nick's eyes lit up in response made my stomach churn. It felt like they were in their own bubble, leaving me on the outside looking in.

Ellie looked at me and she frowned and nudged me gently. "Y/N, what's going on? You look like you've just seen a ghost."

I forced a weak smile, attempting to mask the turmoil inside. "Oh, nothing. Just caught up in my thoughts, you know?"

But Ellie wasn't buying it. She followed my gaze, her eyes narrowing as she took in the scene outside. "Oh...that's Imogen. That's one of Nick's close friends,"

"Oh, really?" I tried to sound casual, but I could feel a knot forming in my stomach. "Just a friend, huh?"

Ellie shot me a knowing look, her eyebrows raised. "Y/N, are you getting jealous?"

"What? No!" I protested a bit too quickly, my cheeks heating up. "I mean, why would I be jealous? We're just friends, like I said."

Ellie chuckled, clearly amused by my reaction. "Sure, just friends. a friend who you have a crush on."

I rolled my eyes, attempting to change the subject. "Let's focus on something else. What were you saying before about our plans for the weekend?"

Ellie raised an eyebrow, clearly not letting me off the hook that easily. "Smooth transition, but we'll get back to this later. Anyway, I was thinking we could do a little movie night at Tao's. We can bring some snacks, binge-watch our favorite films, and just unwind."

"Yeah, that sounds great," I replied, trying to shake off the uneasy feeling. "Movies and snacks sound like the perfect distraction."

As we continued discussing our weekend plans, my mind kept drifting back to Nick and Imogen. I couldn't help but wonder if there was something more between them. Were they just friends, or was there a deeper connection? The uncertainty gnawed at me, and I found myself absentmindedly scrolling through our previous texts.

The guys were practicing for an upcoming match, and I was just here cleaning the Rugby they have already gotten so dirty after a couple of throws. Occasionally, Nick would glance over in my direction, offering a reassuring smile or a quick wave.

"I can't believe they have cleaning rugby balls. Doing the dirty work while we get all the glory?" Charlie teased, nudging me with his elbow.

I chuckled, playfully swatting at him. "Someone's got to keep these in top-notch condition. Can't have you all playing with muddy balls, can we?"

Charlie raised an eyebrow. "Speaking of action, I noticed I haven't been seeing you lately. Any particular reason?"

I hesitated for a moment, debating how much to reveal. Finally, I decided to open up to Charlie, knowing he'd always knows what to do. "Well, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. You know, get some 'guy advice.'"

"I think I am the worse person to give 'guy advice'. especially now" Charlie looked down the ground.

Noticing the sadness in his eyes, I joked around with him "Oh come on, Charlie, don't be so hard on yourself. You're my go-to guy for advice, whether you like it or not."

He managed a small grin, "Alright, shoot. What do you need from my services this time?"

I sighed, glancing back at Nick on the field, his focused demeanor contrasting with the playful banter of the other players. "It's just... things have been different lately. We've been hanging out more, texting, you know, normal friend stuff. But I can't help but feel there's something more."

Charlie looked worried as soon as I brought up Nick's name, "Of course this is about Nick Nelson,"

I nodded, "Yeah, it is. I mean, we're friends, but there are these moments, these looks, and it makes me wonder if there's something more. And then today- I don't know... it just hit me differently."

Charlie glanced around to ensure no one was eavesdropping before he spoke. "Look, I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but there's something I think you should know."

My heart sank a little, and I furrowed my brows in concern. "What is it, Charlie? You're making me nervous."

He took a deep breath before continuing "Okay so Tao told me to tell you that-

"Wait why couldn't Tao just tell me himself?"

Charlie looked a little uneasy "Because Tao is Tao"

Great he still doesn't like me.

I shook my head, urging Charlie to continue. "Tell me what Tao said."

He took a deep breath before continuing, "Tao found out from a friend who is also friends with Nick, and he said that Nick is single. But he is super interested in this girl that was originally from the all-girls school."

I swallowed the lead in my throat "What girl,"

Charlie sighed looking out onto the field "Her name's Tara Jones,"

My heart sank as Charlie dropped the bomb about Nick's interest in Tara Jones. Her name replayed in my mind like an annoying song on repeat. I couldn't shake off the blame creeping in why did I let myself get attached? Was I just too naive, thinking there could be more between us?

Nick's wave from the field added salt to the wound. I managed a feeble smile and a wave back, but inside, it felt like a whirlwind of emotions. Watching him, I questioned every shared laugh and conversation we had. Were they all just leading up to this moment where he'd be drawn to someone else?

The game raged on in the background, but my world stood still in that painful moment of realization. The cheers from the crowd turned into distant echoes, drowned out by the pounding of my heart, echoing the rhythm of disappointment.

How can I be so stupid.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

She was so beautiful, and I could see why Nick might be into her. Browsing through her social media, her confidence and elegance just stood out. It's something I feel like I lack. Her dark skin had this warm, rich tone that glowed in every photo. The more I looked, the more I found myself comparing. It made me question if I could ever match up to someone like her in Nick's eyes. The more I scrolled, the more I felt like an outsider peeking into a world that seemed so different from mine.

"See, I told you," Tao said, peering over my shoulder. Charlie shot him an annoyed look.

"Tao, come on, give it a rest. This doesn't necessarily mean anything," Charlie snapped.

"Like hell it doesn't," Tao retorted. I deeply sighed; their bickering wasn't making the situation any better. Isaac looked at me with a hint of concern.

"We don't even know if she actually likes Nick back," Isaac chimed in, attempting to offer some comfort.

Charlie scoffed, "I'm the one stuck seeing them in class every day, and trust me, it's nauseating. Believe me, he's into you," he added, shooting me a look.

Tao, fixing his gaze on Isaac, cautioned, "I've warned you about fueling romantic fantasies that just won't happen. Life isn't a romance novel, you know." ignoring Charlie reassurance.

"But I want to believe in romance." Isaac wined still looking hopeful. Our heads turned to the door when Ellie came in, Isaac immediately jumped at the chance "Ellie! So, there's this girl at school who Nick's got a crush on?"

"We've heard from multiple sources" Tao cut in, but Isaac completed ignored him "We don't know if they're a thing. Can you talk to her? Since she is in your year"

Isaac's hopeful gaze shifted to Ellie, who raised an eyebrow at his enthusiasm. "Whoa, slow down. First, spill the tea. Who's this mystery girl Nick's into?" Ellie said, playing dumb while glancing at me to check if it was Imogen we were talking about. I just quietly shook my head no

Tao chimed in, "Her name's Tara Jones. She was originally from the all-girls school."

Ellie crossed her arms, processing the information definitely wasn't expecting that. "Tara Jones? She's a sweetheart, I don't know Tara that well. I can just go up to her and ask who she fancies. And I'm, too busy being the cool, mysterious new girl, who everyone wants to hang out with."

Isaac quickly jumped back into the conversation, seizing the opportunity. "We just want to know if there's something going on between her and Nick. You know, for Y/N's peace of mind."

"I'm fine. It's honestly fine. I'm just being an idiot and overthinking things," This whole thing has been stressing me out, more than I realize. It's probably best if I cut my losses now before I get more attached.

Ellie gave me a sympathetic glance rolling her eyes while she sighed "Well, I can try to find out, but no promises, only if I get a chance I'll ask her,"

I flashed her a thankful smile, and Isaac promptly leaped into Ellie's arms. Sometimes, I forget how much of a hopeless romantic he is. Charlie joined in, gesturing for me to join them. Gratefully, I embraced the warmth of the hug. I realized I wouldn't know where I'd be without them.

Tao sat there, glaring, watching the scene.

The next school day rolled around, and I made a quick stop at the boys' locker room to check on inventory, making sure to steer clear of any awkward encounters, especially with Nick Nelson. Luckily, I managed to avoid any unexpected run-ins. However, as I strolled to my next class, it hit me that I'd be sharing a class with him soon. The knot in my stomach tightened, and a sense of unease settled in, a reminder of the events from the day before.

Waving at Charlie as I eased into my seat, a jumble of nerves hit me hard. Concentrating seemed like an impossible task, with my thoughts entirely hijacked by the looming encounter with Nick. What in the world was I even going to say to him, if I mustered the courage to say anything at all? The classroom blurred as my mind grappled with racing thoughts.

"Y/N?" he said, staring right at me with worried eyes.

Finally returning back to earth, I mumbled, "What?"

"You just spaced out," he observed.

Not knowing what to say, I managed a simple "Oh," fiddling with my blue pen, which oddly seemed to help with my nerves. Nick, sensing the habit, scooted closer to me. I swear I could feel his body warmth.

"What's up?" he said, looking directly at me. "I can tell when something's on your mind," he added in a hush, leaning even more closely.

Gosh, I hate the way he makes me feel. The way I act around him is ridiculous. I hate that every time he gets close, my heart races, every touch, every feeling. I hate all of it!

Why does he make me feel this way?

"Do you...Do you want to come to my house later?" I blurted out, causing for Charlie to peek over at me with panic eyes screaming What the hell are you doing!

He looked surprised, but all he can do is smile.

Mom is not going to be here until super late, so I can have the house all to myself. I cleaned from top to bottom of house, throwing all the boxes away and tightening up everything was squared away.

Hearing a knock at the door, it was him standing at my door smiling from ear to ear.

"Hey"

Opening the door for him, "Hey,"

"So, how does this work?" he asked hesitantly, glancing around the room as if unsure of what to capture with my old Canon. The way he held the camera was so awkward, it brought a smile to my face.

Figuring it was a fair trade after all the rugby lessons, I decided to teach Nick a thing or two about photography.

"You can take a picture of anything you like, really. It could be something beautiful, something that grabs your attention, or simply anything that intrigues you," I explained, observing him furrow his brows while peering through the viewfinder.

"Anything?" he asked, seeking confirmation.

I nodded, a spark of enthusiasm lighting up my eyes. "Exactly! That's the beauty of it. Photography allows you to freeze a moment in time, to capture something you love, like, or find amusing. It's incredible how a single image can encapsulate so much emotion, tell a story, or even memories."

Nick listened attentively, his curiosity evident. I continued, "You see, every photo has a story behind it. It's a way of preserving feelings, experiences, and moments that might otherwise fade away. You get to share your perspective with others through the lens, allowing them to see the world through your eyes."

As I spoke, I could see Nick growing more intrigued, absorbing the idea of photography beyond just pressing a button. "Give it a try," I encouraged, "Capture something that stands out to you, something you'd want to remember."

Right as I looked back at Nick, I noticed that fuck, he was looking directly at me. His eyes looked into mine and there it was again, that knot in my stomach. I didn't know what to do, I had completely froze. His eyes seemed different though-

Feeling a buzz in my pocket, I checked my phone. It was a message from my mom, letting me know she wouldn't be home until midnight and that there was lasagna in the fridge. A sigh of relief escaped my lips, knowing I wouldn't have to explain having a boy in my room when she returned.

Hearing a click, I turned to Nick, curious about what had caught his attention through the lens of my camera. "What did you take a picture of?" I asked.

"Just something that I thought was beautiful," Nick replied with a soft smile, his eyes lingering on mine. Raising my eyebrows confused but also curious. He didn't say anything at all, other than putting the camera down.

"Want to watch a movie?" he suggested,

"Already one step ahead of you," I grinned, pulling out one of my favorite Marvel movies.

We settled into the living room couch, time passes by, and my eyelids begin to grow heavy. Waking up to see the credits rolling I quickly sat up. I completely sleep through the whole entire movie.

Looking out the window, it was dark outside, looking at Nick he seemed to be tensed.

"I feel asleep, didn't I?" I chuckled.

Nick's lips curved into a gentle smile, "Yeah, you did. Must have been a comfortable couch."

I stretched my arms, attempting to shake off the drowsiness. "Sorry about that. I guess I needed the nap."

Nick shrugged, "No problem. You looked peaceful."

We sat quietly, the feel of the movie night still in the air. Even with the unexpected nap, the evening felt calm.

"I should probably head home," Nick said, glancing at the time. "It's getting late."

As he stood up, I walked him to the door. Opening it without caring about the cold air seeping in, the night possessed a certain calmness, and the air held a subtle tension, like the moment before something shifts.

"Thanks for inviting me over," Nick said, and for a moment, our eyes met in a way that spoke volumes, yet said nothing at all.

"I wish that you didn't have to go," I admitted, feeling the weight of the night settling in.

"I wish I didn't either," Nick confessed, a hint of reluctance in his voice.

"You look so cuddly like that," he added, his gaze lingering on my knitted sweater.

My eyes softened, and a playful grin tugged at the corners of my lips. "You think so?"

He nodded, smiling back at me. "Yeah, like a giant teddy bear."

I chuckled, feeling a warmth spreading through me that had nothing to do with the sweater. "Well, I guess I'll take that as a compliment."

Nick's cheeks turned a shade of pink, and he scratched the back of his head, a sheepish grin on his face "It's meant to be one," he replied, and we stood there for a moment, the unspoken words hanging in the air.

He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "Well, if I didn't have early morning practice, I might consider staying longer."

I felt a subtle warmth spreading through me. The casual banter, the shared laughter it all felt so easy and right. Yet, there was an unspoken tension, a magnetic pull that lingered between us.

"I guess I'll see you around," Nick said, but he didn't make a move to the open door; it looked like he wanted to say something else he just couldn't find the words.

As he stepped closer, the air between us seemed to shift, and before I knew it, he pulled me into a gentle hug.

Vanilla. Smoke. and Musk

I slowly wrapped my arms around, wanting to not let go, but he quickly pulled away, backing towards the door.

"Um… catch you on Monday," he mumbled, clearing his throat, his gaze fixed anywhere but on me. He melted into the night, leaving me standing there, gaping at the door, with a whirlwind of thoughts spinning through my mind.

Charlie casually peeked around the side of the door, and from the look on his face, it was clear he caught the whole thing.

"Still questioning if he's into you?" Charlie asked, shooting me a knowing look.

Part 6 Link Here: https://www.tumblr.com/cutecurly-hair/759302465187414016/hearts-unleashed-part-6

[bihansthot]

Name: Mid-Autumn Festival 1,000 Follower Spectacular!

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Bi-Han x afab!Reader

Word Count: 4,000

Summary: You and your husband Bi-Han enjoy a nice family dinner at Madam Bo’s for the Mid-Autumn Festival and later enjoy some alone time with one another, experimenting in ways you never have.

Author’s notes: Happy Mid-Autumn Festival lovelies! Have I got a treat for you and it involves mooncakes but that’s not all! Y’all wanted Bi-Han getting a prostate massage and fuck if I didn’t deliver it! This is kind of a mash up of things I wanted to write, one being festival stuff, the other being a celebration of hitting over 1.000 followers here on tumblr! It’s so wild to me that a blog that just rambles about Bi-Han and writes about him has so much love but here we are! This story has some dirty talk and possessive Bi-Han in it but also has some soft moments, its a good mix of fun and filth and hopefully y’all enjoy it! If you do please don’t be shy with the likes, comments, reblogs, DMs etc. Let me know you liked it please! Enjoy lovelies!

You giggle and shove Bi-Han’s heavy body off of yours, “Polar Bear, stop, we’re in public,” your words are slightly slurred as you find yourself pleasantly buzzed. You look around the expansive tea house and despite the size everything seems warm and homey, you’re always happy when you’re out with Bi-Han at Madam Bo’s.

“Come on qīn, it’s the Mid Autumn Festival it is all about the love between Chang’e and Hou Yi, you shouldn’t be stingy with the affection,” Bi-Han laughed and you could tell by the blush high on his cheeks that the cryomancer was drunk, or at least tipsy, Bi-Han could hold his liquor quite well and you didn’t think you’ve ever actually seen him drunk.

“Brother, why don’t you have some more to eat, that’s what the Mid-Autumn Festival is really about, sharing food with your family,” Kuai Liang chimes in pushing a delectable-looking bowl of steamed crabs toward Bi-Han. “Father always used to talk about the importance of spending time together as a family.”

“Fuck Father, I’m glad he’s dead,” Bi-Han slurs before reaching for a steamed pork bun instead as he bit into the light, fluffy bun.

“Polar Bear, please not tonight, tonight is about family, don’t upset your brother’s please,” you urge, your face clouding with worry.

“Tch, sorry qīn, you’re right tonight it about celebrating family and being together,” he grumbles reluctantly and motions for you to pour him another cup of baijiu.

You’re hesitant to pour another cup for him, but you don’t want to deal with his complaining and posturing if you don’t so despite your better judgment you pour the liquor into his cup. You reach for some of Madam Bo’s delicious har gao and happily eat the plump, juicy shrimp dumpling leaving the crabs for your husband and brothers-in-law to share.

“It was a good idea coming down to Madam Bo’s for Mid-Autumn Festival this year, none of us have to clean up afterwards,” Tomas laughs and takes one of the crabs for himself. “I know I appreciate it! Do you know how much work it is cooking and cleaning up for the three of you?” You laugh and take a sip of oolong tea, trying to pace yourself on drinking, you’re well aware you can’t hold your liquor quite as well as Bi-Han can, well not baijiu at any rate.

“Who cleans up qin? Huh?” Bi-Han raises his eyebrow at you and you have the decency to look sheepish knowing full well the cryomancer always did the cleanup when you did the cooking.

“I, uh well,” you shove some roast duck in Bi-Han’s mouth to silence the cryomancer’s protests. “Tomas, how are things lately, I feel like I haven’t see you or Kuai Liang in ages,” you switch the topic.

“Things have been challenging but very rewarding, work with the Shirai Ryu are going well and we’ve even managed to find a promising new initiative, his name is Hanzo,” Tomas answers with ease in between sips of his own glass of baijiu.

You were so pleased the brothers had managed to work out their differences after Fire God Liu Kang and intervened and the two of you had talked some sense into Bi-Han. Kuai Liang and Tomas had still kept their Shirai Ryu to be the guardians and protectors of Earthrealm whereas Bi-Han kept his Lin Kuei and they were granted more of a prominent role in the tournament and guiding Earthrealm. It had been harder to convince Sektor that his army of drones were no longer necessary, but thankfully Bi-Han had seen sense and had commanded Sektor to stand down. There was still definitely tension between the brothers, but you were content that you were all in a good enough place that you all could come together to celebrate the Mid-Autumn Festival as a family. The festival was a foreign concept to you when you first arrived in Fengjian, but you had fallen in love with the holiday when Bi-Han told you the story of Chag’e and Hou Yi, their beautiful, tragic love story made you weep, but despite the sorrow you loved the idea of being able to celebrate their love. “Hanzo huh? Well that’s good, I’m glad to hear things are going well, but I will admit things are lonely without all of you.”

“Earthrealm needs the Shirai Ryu, its a sacrifice we all have to make,” Kuai Liang interjected before you could get too involved in clan politics.

“Yes, of course, I understand,” you reply, sneaking another dumpling and a sip of tea, the table was laden with so much food there was no way the four of you would be able to finish, you regret not inviting Sektor and Cyrax, but thought it was better they weren’t there as there was still bad blood between the two clans.

“Who’s ready for Moon Cakes?” Madam Bo suddenly interrupts, placing a heaping plate of assorted pastries on the table.

“Moon cakes!” You squeal with excitement and suddenly you somehow feel hungry again, you had never had the pastry before you started dating Bi-Han, but after trying them you were hooked on them, the custard-filled ones were your favorite. As if she were a psychic Madam Bo pops a mini custard-filled one in your mouth and you can’t help moaning with delight as the flaky pastry gives way to the luxurious custard inside.

“Madam Bo, you spoil us,” Tomas smiles at the elderly patroness as she smiles at your happy reaction to the confection.

“Nonsense Smoke, it’s Mid-Autumn Festival! Everyone gets moon cakes! I can’t have my customers unsatisfied on such an auspicious day,” Madam Bo chirps happily.

“Thank you Madam Bo,” you manage after finishing your miniature moon cake, a look of satisfaction plastered to your face.

“The one with the black dot is the sesame one Bi-Han,” Madam Bo laughs before slipping him the bill and heading off to tend to her other customers.

Bi-Han doesn’t hesitate grabbing one of the ones with the black dots, sesame moon cakes you know are his favorite and he acts like a little kid when he gets one, to the point that you’re surprised he doesn’t ask you the make the confection year round. He finishes off his moon cake before draining his umpteenth cup of baijiu, he counts out his bills carefully before adding some extra for Madam Bo, despite tipping not being customary in China, it was a holiday after all and Madam Bo deserved it for her warmth and hospitality. “Shall we?” he asks standing up and swaying on his feet slightly.

The four of you make your way back to the Lin Kuei Temple as you bid good night to your brothers-in-law and giggle drunkenly toddling after Bi-Han.

You flop on your shared bed as Bi-Han struggles with getting his belt off, he finally works his way through all the layers of his belt and lets it fall on the stone floor. You watch him wrestle with the rest of his complex uniform, in no state to be able to help him with the various layers and complex knots holding his layers off. After several long minutes, Bi-Han seems to finally work his way out of his excessively complicated robes as he flops on the bed next to you. “I’m proud of you Polar Bear, I know letting your brothers leave and create their own clan isn’t easy for you, but you did a very good job acting very civilized tonight.”

“I don’t want to talk about them, show me your tiddies,” he smirks at you reaching for the hem of your qipao you had worn at his insistence.

You laugh at his immature behavior, “help me unzip it then,” you whisper running your hand along his smooth cheek.

“Fine, fine,” he agrees, giving you a slightly petulant pout as if to say, how can’t you just become instantly naked, as he tugs the zipper down and carefully helps you out of the garment.

You’re pleased that even in his inebriated state Bi-Han had the common sense to remember this was your favorite qipao, one based off of one of his mother’s, and he was gentle with it. You lay next to him in just your lingerie, one of your favorite sets, dark blue and lacy, it was equal parts delicate and sexy, it also fit perfectly, there was no overflow or pinching and the underwear hid your imperfect little belly.

“Fuck your tits are huge,” He laughs drunkenly burying his cold face in between your ample chest making pleased little noises as he rubs his face back and forth.

“Polar Bear,” you giggle as you tug his hair loose from his tie, his ebony locks spilling down his well-muscled back, you stroke his silken locks as your husband continues to amuse himself with your breasts.

“I love your tits so much, they’re so soft and so jiggly, they’re like big ol’ flans,” he chuckles as he reaches around to undo the clasp of your bra to be able to manhandle them with ease.

You let out a soft sigh of pleasure as his cold, calloused hands squeeze and grope your sensitive breasts. “I want to play with you tonight, please?” You pull Bi-Han’s head up to look him in his beautiful chocolate eyes as you give him your best pleading look.

He sucks in a low breath and reluctantly rolls off of you to give you free rein of his body, “what did you have in mind qin?”

“There’s something I want to try, keep an open mind Polar Bear, its supposed to feel really good for you, I promise,” you bite your lower lip, sucking it into your mouth as your eyes roam over his flawless body.

“What?” He asks sitting up on his elbows, trying to fight off the pleasant floaty feeling the baijiu has given him.

“I’m not going to tell you, you just have to trust me, you know I’d never do anything to hurt you, but it might be kind of weird,” you explain running your warm hand along his aching, cold cock.

He leans back with a pleased groan as he lets you stroke his cock with slow, gentle strokes, “fine, but it better feel good,” he mumbles, bucking his hips up slightly.

“Where’s the lube,” you ask pressing a kiss to his cold cheek.

“Lube? What the fuck do you need lube for?” Bi-Han bristles immediately at the mention of the lubricant.

“I need it to jack you off, you said you’d keep an open mind Polar Bear,” you frown at him as you straddle his narrow hips.

The cryomancer grunts unhappily as he relents, “its in the draw in the bedside table,” he tells you as he squirms under you trying to get some friction for his neglected cock.

“Got it,” you grin triumphantly as you pull the tube from the drawer and make your way back to Bi-Han’s dripping cock, it's so pretty you lick your lips, huge, dripping, and heavy against his perfectly cut abs. “Mmm Polar Bear your cock looks delicious right now, I’m a little jealous of my hand,” you sigh almost wistfully as you squeeze some of the lubricant in your hand as you grasp his big cock and give it a gentle tug.

“You can suck it instead,” the cryomancer grins at you as he lifts himself back up on his elbows to watch you.

“Maybe I will,” you muse sticking your tongue out playfully as you fist him gently, not applying much pressure yet, just teasing the cryomancer, loving the feeling of his thick, veiny cold cock in your hand. You lay with your head on his rock-hard abs as you can’t help but let your tongue dart out and gather the pearly fluid leaking out of Bi-Han’s cock, it’s cold but not bitter, salty but not unpleasant, musky and masculine and perfectly him.

“Mmm qin, that feels nice,” the cryomancer practically purrs in his drunken state, something you absolutely loved was how Bi-Han didn’t seem to care about how vocal he was when he had been drinking.

Your hand works along his cock, stroking him with a firm grasp as you twist your hand in a circle when you reach his soft, velveteen head, “Bi-Han,” you whine his name as you look up at his pretty flushed face, his hair hanging loose around his face as he bites his lip with pleasure, it was the perfect picture a sight no one but you were privy to see. Your hand moves faster now, pulling another groan from the cryomancer as you jack him off, you seize your chance while he’s focused on the feeling of your hand gliding over his dick, you switch hands so your lubricated hand is no longer stroking the cryomancer, who hisses at the added drag your other hand offered. You take a deep breath and swallow audibly as you carefully nudge his legs further apart and there it is, the little pucker that you have your sights set on. Slowly, carefully you trace the outside of the hole with your slicked-up finger and before Bi-Han can react or stop you, you slowly sink the finger inside.

“Wha-what the fuck!? What are you doing qin?!” He starts, body going rigid, his ass clamping around you instinctually.

You ignore him though and fish around inside him for that little bundle of nerves that you know in spite of himself is going to make Bi-Han feel good, and you find it as you stroke it with a come hither motion.

“Huh, wha, why hnnnggghhh,” the cryomancer can’t hold back the pleased noise as you stroke his prostate, “fucking stop this is weird,” he starts to sit up.

Your hot mouth drops over his cock, swallowing him down as best as you can in a practiced motion, your finger wiggling further in his tight hole.

“Ah, fuck qin, that, that feels kind of good, do… do it again,” he pants and squeezes his eyes shut as he relaxes against the bed enjoying the feeling of your warmth encompassing his cold cock.

The noises he makes are like heaven to you as your mouth works his cock over, your tongue laving every inch of it as you suck it further into your throat. Slowly you work a second finger into the tight ring of muscle as you massage the cryomancer’s prostate, your fingers dancing across the fleshy nub.

“Ta ma de,” he groans deeply in his native tongue as he subconsciously grinds his perfect ass against your fingers, the baijiu loosening his inhibitions enough to enjoy this very rare role reversal.

You pull away from his delicious cock to echo his sentiment, “fuck,” you take in his flushed, blissed-out expression as you thrust your fingers in and out slowly, applying steady even pressure to the small organ inside the cryomancer.

Bi-Han lets out a low moan as your fingers speed up, his body starting to tremble with his impending release, “shit qin, that feels really good, keep going, please,” he practically bites his own tongue to stop himself from begging like a little bitch in heat.

Your tongue massages the underside of his shaft as your fingers keep moving in and out of the cryomancer’s tightness, you never actually thought you’d get this far, you thought maybe you’d get one finger in before he wigged out and stormed off for the night but actually getting to finger fuck your husband made your brain short circuit. You shift and rub your thighs together trying to alleviate some of the mounting pressure, seeing Bi-Han look so fucked out had you nearly cumming from the sounds he made alone. Your stomach feels tight as arousal pools in it and you don’t know how much longer you can keep yourself from making the cryomancer fuck you, you want to see him cum though, you want to taste his cold, viscous fluid filling your mouth, so you don’t stop, you can’t stop, you ignore your own desires and focus solely on his. You bob your head along his cock, forcing as much inside as possible, it burns as it stretches your throat, but the little shout Bi-Han makes is worth the discomfort. Your finger twist and screw in and out of the cryomancer’s tight confines, each press and thrust of your fingers massaging his prostate more and more.

“Qin, I’m gonna,” he gasps and lets out a choked-off cry as he tries to warn you, but you get the message, your fingers double their efforts as you pound into his prostate and you pull back until only the tip of his huge cock is left in your mouth. With a loud growling shout of pleasure, Bi-Han is cumming in your mouth.

You moan as the icy liquid splashes against your tongue the saltiness coating your mouth with the thick liquid. Your tongue swishes the cold fluid around as you swallow frantically trying not to spill a drop of the cryomancer’s cum, you can’t help it though, Bi-Han cums so much more than a mouthful as some of his release flows down your chin.

Bi-Han just moans with satisfaction as his release keeps seeping from your hot mouth, his hips still as do your fingers, “fuck me, what was that?”

“A prostate massage,” you answer, pulling off his cock with an audible pop as you swallow down more of the cryomancer’s essence. You wipe your chin off and make a show of licking your finger clean watching Bi-Han’s lust-darkened eyes, you raise an eyebrow as you look down at his still-hard cock. “Someone’s not done apparently,” you comment gesturing to his huge dick.

“Well of course not, my girl hasn’t cum yet, I still have a job to do,” he growls before pouncing on you and pinning you down. The cryomancer all but rips your soaked panties off as he rubs the velvety head of his cock against your dripping walls.

“Fuck Bi-Han, please, I need to cum so bad, seeing you like that has me so turned on, you were so hot,” you babble as his dick slowly opens you up as his cock sinks into your tight pussy. You cry out loudly at the feeling of the cryomancer rearranging your insides to make room for his massive cock, it feels so good, the stretch and slight burn as he buries his cock inside you.

“Mmm fuck qin, you were made just for me weren’t you? You’re always so pretty and so wet for me, such a good little slut,” he growls possessively as he holds himself inside you balls deep letting you get used to his huge cock.

“Ahhh, Bi-Han please,” you whimper as he starts to move, the pressure in your stomach teetering on unbearable, you knew your little pregame session sucking his cock and finger fucking the cryomancer had turned you on, but you didn’t realize how much it had turned you on. One thrust from the cryomancer and you were practically seeing stars, you shout and throw your arms around him tangling your fingers in his loose hair.

“Hold on tight qin, I don’t feel like taking things slow tonight,” the cryomancer shoots you a smirk and all you can do is moan in response.

You cry out his name over and over as he begins to piston in and out of your tight, wet hole, everything feels too much all at once but perfect all at the same time. Each stroke of his cock drives deeper and deeper into your welcoming pussy as the fat head of his cock assaults your sweet spot. You’re dizzy and lightheaded within minutes and it had nothing to do with the alcohol you consumed, it was all from the cryomancer’s actions, the way his cock moved in and out of your body, the way his weight bore down on you, the way he claimed you as his own.

“Such a good little slut, whining and whimpering so prettily for me, you just love getting stuffed with my big cock don’t you? It’s what you were made for, taking my cock and only my cock, no one else gets to touch you qin, you’re mine,” the cryomancer growls, possession dripping from his words as his grip moves from your hips to press the undersides of your thighs towards your stomach.

“Only you Bi-Han, I’m only yours,” you cry out as the pressure becomes unbearable and heat pools in your stomach despite your body being chilled from the inside out. You cling to the cryomancer, trying to ground yourself but only wind up pulling his hair causing Bi-Han to let out a low, warning growl.

“Only I get to touch you, only I get to fuck you and only I get to paint that pretty little pussy white with my cum, but you’re such a little slut you love every minute of it don’t you,” Bi-Han continues, his words edging you closer and closer to your peak as his cock rams into your cervix over and over causing your entire body to tremble and shake in his grasp.

“Only you Bi-Han, oh fuck only you!” You cry out as your toes curl and the pressure bursts, you cry out his name shrilly as your head thrashes back and forth as your tongue lolls to the side as you cum hard around Bi-Han’s perfect cock. Stars burst before your eyes and pleasure floods your body as you shutter and heave below Bi-Han’s flawless, thrusting body.

Bi-Han groans deeply as he presses your thighs almost flush to your stomach, plowing in and out of your body with little regard for how oversensitive you were in this state, he was only concerned with his own orgasm. He keeps fucking you hard, pounding your cervix open with each thrust as he chases his high, loving the way you cry and tremble for him, “what a good little slut, such a good girl for me, I’ve going to fill you up with my cum now,” he grunts out in between gritted teeth as his hips start to falter and lose their rhythm. “Oh fuck, that’s it, that’s my good slut,” he lets out a low bellow as he stills inside you.

You cry and shake as the cryomancer’s final onslaught brings you to your peak once more, hot fat tears drip down your cheeks as he pushes you past reason. The sensation of Bi-Han’s cold viscous cum painting your walls white does you in, with a weak little sob of his name, you’re tumbling over the edge hurtling towards darkness as your orgasm consumes you.

Neither of you move for a while, you couldn’t even if you wanted as you’re trapped under the weight of the cryomancer as you finally regain consciousness. You whimper softly, unable to find your voice yet as you shiver with cold brought on by the cryomancer being buried deep inside you still.

Reluctantly the cryomancer finally rolls off you to the side of the bed, “fuck qin, that was, well that was something else alright.”

“That was so good,” you whisper, barely able to form coherent thoughts yet, “your cock is too good, I still feel drunk, but I don’t think it’s the liquor anymore,” you giggle softly as you grab one of the fur comforters from the bottom of the bed and roll up in it before slotting yourself next to Bi-Han, laying your head against his rock hard pecs.

“We should, uh maybe try that again sometime,” Bi-Han admits, his cheeks colored with a rosy shade of pink as he looks away not wanting to make eye contact.

“Anytime you want Polar Bear, anytime you want,” you agree and smile before slipping into a very deep and very restful sleep.

[seraphinitegames]

The Wayhaven Chronnicles - Update 22/Sept/2023

Another week down towards the fast-approaching end of the planning phase! Aaahhhh!

As I’m getting towards the final stages, I’m adding more and more actual dialogue lines into the plan. And I’ve already picked out a few of those lines knowing I definitely want to use them for tag lines/marketing! They are SO juicy and good, hehe! :D

Think the problem will be making final decisions on which to use as I have so many already as possibles for each character, lol!

I’m continuing with adding in those finishing details to the plan that will hopefully help writing go much smoother and quicker. One of the most fun ones of those this week was getting to grips with a certain set of scenes that kind of show some of vampires’ friendships outside of Unit Bravo. It’s only small scenes, but I really love that little bit of insight into how they are with others outside of their ‘family’. Especially when the topic of conversation is our MCs! ;D

But with the writing phase steadily approaching, and the more autumnal cosy weather on its way at the same time, I’m already very, VERY eager for October to get here!

Hope you all have the most fantastic weekend! We’ll be offline as usual, so I’ll talk to you all again next week!

[xanticore]

Can you do a Lars ulrich fic where the reader is part of it can you do a dominant submissive relationship kinks where Lars is dominant and the girl or whoever is a submissive also the as well smut??

Back in 1984 in the hotel room???

I hope you enjoy anon! I don't like going straight into smut so yeah..it's a bit slow in the beginning but it gets juicy. promise.

“𝐒𝐇𝐄’𝐒 𝐃𝐈𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓’’

Genre: Smut

Setting: Summer of 1984 ,, New York

Warnings: Slight usage of the daddy kink (Lars gets so surprised by it) P in V, oral f receiving, pet names, and sailor mouth from Lars.

Summary: The band had finished their recording for ride the lighting. They all agreed to celebrate by hanging out at a club- getting drunk and hopefully be able to take a girl back to a hotel. Lately Lars hasn't had great experiences with the recent groupies he was with. None of them really fit his sex appeal. That all had changed when he saw a girl smoking alone.

"You gotta be fucking with me!" I blurted out before putting the phone back on the hook. A fan that goes by 'Lola' told me I'm an asshole. Maybe she's right. Only because I couldn't take how fucking horrible she was in bed. It really wasn't that great. I felt utter boredom with that chick.

"Was that Lola?" Kirk said in a teasing tone. I just huffed and rolled my eyes. "Of course it was. apparently I wasn't making her feel good, well tough world we live in because I didn't nut myself. Now we both can't have our way." I heard the other members let out a chuckle and it only made me more ticked.

For some reason, I could never find the fun girls like the others. They always had exciting fucking stories to tell about their night. Me, sometimes I either sleep alone or try to have fun with a girl that I bring back. Nobody was into anything I was. They just laid there and took it.

Im fucking 21! and I start my sex life completely shit. It's like I'm having sex with someone's grandma. Like Gross. I want some action. More interaction at least with a girl. I just wanna have fun till I can't anymore.

"Well, We did decide to hit up a club in downtown Manhattan. Maybe you'll find your girl there~" Cliff said giving me a wink. I forgot that quick we were in New York fucking city. "Oh yeah, New Yorker girls are totally hot too. Maybe you'll find that babe you're looking for." James added on.

I was now stoked for tonight. As the youngest in the band, I wanna try and have a good time and able to tell them stories. Stories that they can possibly relate to.

After being out all day, I took a quick nap in my room so I could have some energy for the rest of the night. I wanted to at least look presentable-but then got a reality check. Its a club filled with late teenagers and early twenty year olds. I just threw on a random band shirt with some black ripped jeans and some Nikes. I sprayed some cologne observing myself in the mirror.

"Come on Lars...you got this. Totally got this. We're gonna have fun and enjoy ourselves."

I talked with myself to give me some self confidence. I was full of it. Overly optimistic. I headed down to the hotel lobby where I was the last one to arrive. We had a personal driver that drove us to the top club strip of manhattan. The city lights of the ads and neon advertisements filled the night sky. It had my eyes 'glimmering' as Kirk would say.

We decided to walk along the strip instead, thanking our driver. "We'll take a cab back~" I said reassuring the driver. I saw him nod and left the van. The night life was now and all the adults were out in their club outfits walking along the sidewalk. It really had my heart racing in anticipation on how I'll end my night. Will it be good? or bad. Find out in the next episode of Lars' questionable sex life.

"Jeez, theres so many clubs. Should we just go to a typical twenty-one plus?" Kirk asked looking carefully at the signes that were out. It was different prices of alcoholic drinks during happy hour if you joind this club or that club. "No- Lets go to The Phantom." I said pointing at the bright purple neon sign. The club had a line literally wrapped around the corner of waiting club goers to get inside.

"Uhh. do you know that the Phantom is for...big shots?" Cliff asked as if he was confused.

"Uhh?? yeah. Thats why I said we should go there. Come on, I think we're big enough of a shot to party with the top class people." I said borderline excitedly, but still kept my cool.

"Ok but, we didn't even dress the part?" Kirk and James added in unison. I just sighed.

"Who gives a shit? Like come on it's a club. its gonna be dark. No one is gonna care about what we wear. Now get your asses over there."

Surprise surprise, there were people who recognized us. We did have shows in New York but it was nothing too extravagant. We were escorted to the front, showed our IDs and were in like a blink of an eye. "I guess you're right larsy~"

I just smirked at Cliff's comment. The music was pumping through its speakers and the flashing club lights were going in random directions. Everyone, dancing; and Kirk was the first one to get dragged out onto the dance floor with a girl. Cliff and James also had a pair come up to them, making me alone.

I just chuckled awkwardly looking around for somewhere to sit. All the seats at the bar was taken so that was out the picture. I didn't really care for sitting right now but I did want a drink in hand as I danced. I ordered myself a bottle of beer, taking it with me to the dance floor. Everyone had their partners but I didn't mind dancing alone having the occasional girls come and go.

Eight songs had passed already and my beer was halfway gone. I wasn't drunk but I desperately need another one to keep me occupied when i'm alone. I pushed my way through the sweaty crowd and back to the same bar. I gestured the bartender for another bottle and gave them a five dollar bill. I scanned the room to see my band mates with girls they found. I was a bit jealous to say the least.

James had two girls on him.

Cliff sharing a smoke with some biker chick.

Kirk was full on making out with someone at a vip table.

Me...at a bar on my second beer bottle with no action. It was time to mingle. I looked around for girls but every girl I saw just reminded me of fucking Lola. All the girls were just copy paste. Just when I was about to give up an leave, I see a girl alone at one of the vip tables. She was alone smoking a cigarette and drinking her drink.

Her hair was jet black and I couldn't tell what she was wearing from where I was standing. She looked hot from a far- could she be hot upclose?

I walked up towards her table- casually passing by Kirk who was still kissing mind you. I sat my beer bottle on the table causing a reaction out of her. "May I sit here?"

I asked politely..oh and by the way- she was totally my type of girl. She gave a gesture and I got in sitting across from her. "You know VIP only right?" Fuck, her voice was deep. "Yeah. What you don't think im an important person?"

"You're from Metallica aren't you?"

"I am sweetheart."

I saw her smile when I answered. She looked so shy and I couldn't really make out what she wanted. I kinda dig it. It was something new from a girl that I just met. "Well~ are you a fan- oop...speak of the devil hmm?" I asked her and just in the nick of time, one of our songs started playing.

"I'm a huge fan actually.." She confesses; tapping the cigarette ashes in the ash tray. Just by looking at her and her body language, I could tell she wasn't a groupie. She wasn't quick to ask anything about my wealth or even anything sexual. She was a genuine fan.

She made many first moves, by that I mean questions. Given her shy and quiet nature, she asked very interesting questions about the music and what's it like being famous. I never took the time to even think to myself about these things. With every questioned asked; I answered with full potential.

Being in the vip section of the club, waiters would come and go with drinks. She would get something fruity while I only had my beer. Luckily for this spot, I didn't have to pay.

"Excuse me sweetheart, I forgot to ask you your name."

"it's (name)"

"(name)? such a pretty name you got there baby. Care to join me on the dance floor?"

I gave her a wink before getting up from the booth. I walked towards her side pulling my hand out waiting for her to grab it. Her hands are so soft and pretty. Her nails were painted in a baby blue and a mood ring on her ring finger. When stood up I was almost towered. I was able to look her up and down and oh my god, she was so beautiful. From her height, her mannerisms, her features of her face-she seemed too unreal.

I manned up and guided her towards the glowing floor. It was a different song now. When Doves Cry by Prince was playing and I could clearly see little miss was a fan of him as well. All she needed was a couple more sips of her drink and baby was good to go. I watched as she mouthed the lyrics turning her back against me. I grabbed her hips helping her keep the rhythm.

I drunk a little bit more of my beer and carelessly threw it somewhere off the floor. Both of my hands touching her. She turned back around and her face was a soft color tint. We were both slightly drunk but still was able to recognize what was going on in our surroundings. I couldn't help but lay a kiss on those pretty plump lips.

It was a real pleasure feeling her kiss back. It was expected. I let her pull away and letting her continue dancing. She was teasing me and damn it I wanted her...

So i got her

The taxi ride back to my hotel felt like it was going on for hours. I opened the door to my room, I had her back against the door. I picked her up letting her legs wrapped around my waist. Our kiss was sloppy and desperate, no order was necessary.

We struggled to get our clothes off once we made it to the bedroom. I laid her down gently before taking my shirt off and letting her take off any piece of clothing she desired. She didn't have a bra on so her chest was immediately exposed to the cold air.

My lips around her hardened nipples as my other free went along to squeeze and grope her. She hummed and I enjoyed the reaction out of her but sadly it wasn't enough to my standards. I went up to her neck licking and biting the sensitive area that didn't take me long to figure out. My hands went down to her legs opening them, helping her slide her lace panties down.

I pulled away to see her now raw, naked body. She was fucking beautiful. She even had some tattoos, and a belly peircing. Fuck. My next move was to eat her alive. I saw her exposed pussy and couldn't help but smirk how wet she was. "You're glistening babydoll" I said slowly lowering myself down. My eyes locked with hers and she was shy at the fact of how I explained how needy she was. It was so fucking cute.

I let my tongue gently rub against her clit and the moans she made was what I was looking for. I continued confidently eating her out, making sure I tasted every drop of her wetness.

Hearing her whine and her fingers getting tangled in my hair was sending me into a frenzy. My jeans getting too fucking tight to handle but I was too busy to even care. All my focuse was on her and her only. Her moans were loud and desperate. Just how I like it.

Her back arches as she pushed my head further into her and of course-i didn't mind that at all. I tongued and finger fucked her hole, letting my other fingers slowly rub against her wet folds. She tasted like sweet sugar; something I never experienced before. I could tell she was close by her breathing patterns. I stopped causing her to groan in annoyance. "I wanna have some fun too~" I cooed lifting my head up to caress her cheek.

I took off my jeans and right when I was lining up to her hole, I had no condom. Fuck, I forgot to buy some earlier. I took a deep sigh smiling at her. "You don't mind me going raw do you babydoll?"

"I don't mind~"

I grinned and slowly pushed inside her. We both let out a sigh of relief feeling each other in intimacy. "Feels good baby?"

I asked. She hummed and that was my go to-to start thrusting. I found a rhythm but didn't necessarily followed it as my pace became desperate when I started to get used to feeling her. She was a moaning mess and her whimpers only made it better. I couldn't help but go a little harder on her.

"Daddy...it feels so good-"

My heart literally did at least two somersaults. I wasn't expecting her to pull that kink card on me and fuck I liked it alot. A little too much. "Oh yeah??" I smirked. I leaned down to kiss her on her neck, biting every possible place that I haven't touched yet. I moved my hand down to rub her clit in circles wanting her to be extra stimulated.

"FUCK..Don't stop please..." She cried out. I just chuckled.

"I had no plans to darlin." I responded, reassuring her. I pulled back and had my hand around her neck choking her. She was the first girl to even let me do this. Her eyes were turning red as it was starting to water. She looked so helpless..so submissive...it turned me on so fucking much. I was nearly close.

"Im gonna...cum...."

"Me too darlin...cum for me..cum for daddy yeah?" I continued to pound into her, the room filled with the sounds of our moans and skin on skin contact. "Fuck.." I quickly pull out and start to stroke myself. I released all of my cum on her stomach just in time. I fell down right beside her as we both tried to relax after coming down from our high.

I turn over to her and saw she was already asleep. It was a perfect opportunity to clean her up and let her rest through the night with me.

The next day

I was woken up by an empty spot in the bed. I frowned but it was flipped when I saw her note on the night stand.

Thank you for last night, I had fun. Sorry I couldn't stay until you woke up though, I had to meet back up with some friends. But here's my number if you still wanna keep contact *** **** - (Name) xoxo

I couldn't believe it, she gave me her number. My heart was honestly beating against my chest hard already.

It was time to head back home and of course, the last person to arrive. The others looked pretty bummed. "Good morning everyone...why the long faces?" I asked in concern. They just sighed. "I didn't get no action, nor sleep because all I heard was you and that girl" Kirk said as he had his arms crossed.

Lars couldn't help but blush out of embarrassment at the last part, but at the same time-couldn't help but laugh. "Seems like I'm the only one that got action huh? oh boy do I have a story to tell~"

a/n : Im still getting the hang of writing smut so please be kind!!!

dividers: cr to owners

[liesmyth]

22!

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

I wouldn't say "everyone ignores it" but EYE would like more eyes on it: the shady past of TLT old folks that the fandom looks upon, broadly, as "more moral" than the rest. I'm always thinking about Pyrrha's early days founding the Cohort. Pyrrha "loved being a cop" who started the Cohort intelligence department and most likely set up the imperial propaganda machine. On a lesser note: Cassiopeia who founded the Sixth House making sure they could secede at will — but she was also a cutthroat layer in a past life and I would bet anything that she was the one who came up with the lifetime contracts stratagem between the Empire and their colony planet. At which point did these guy decide enough was enough? How do they reconcile their past actions with their eventual goals? Or are they on the hypocritical side, thinking that the main issue with the Houses empire is not its structure but who's currently ruling it?

IDK I just think it's very juicy to explore because these kinds of contrasts make my brain go brrrr. It's the same part of my brain that really loves analysing all the ways in which Abigail was a kind-hearted person who may or may not have managed the necromantic version of the East India Company, or likes to read long meta on what the dynamic between Juno and baby Pal might have looked like.

Hopefully this makes sense, I got a bit rambly

[prophetszendo]

Shift in Vampirism

Summary: after looting an abandoned manor, you find a strange scroll, which can change everything for you and Astarion.

Pairing: astarion/you (no pronouns or y/n used, can be any of you)

Word count: 4.7k

Warning: blood, and more blood, and a bit of pain. Also english is not my first language, yet this is my first ever english fanfic I've written. Feel free to point out mistakes or spelling errors or sentences that just sound weird <3

Also, about the dialogs: the software I used to tyoe this out automatically turns the first " into the downward version of it: „. It is because it uses my native language, and here this is how we write them. I didn't figure out how to turn it off and by the time I finisned the fic, manually doing it would have taken me a long time.

This fic is based on a dream I had a few weeks ago. Enjoy!

You sat on your bed as you were sorting through what you looted today. You found an empty village which had an abandoned manor, and you and your teammates didn’t waste any time searching for valuables, food and alcohol. You also picked up some miscalleneous items, of which you weren’t sure what they exactly were.

You rummaged through your bag once more, because you recalled picking up a ring too, and it was not on your bed yet. Technically its wasn’t your bed, but it was the one in the room you decided to spend the night in. All of you got to stay in a rather luxurious room, even if it seemed like noone had been here for some time. Honestly, who cares about some dust and spiderwebs, when you spent the last weeks sleeping on rocks and branches?

Your hand caught onto the ring, and you took a closer look. It was pretty, that’s for sure, but if there was more to it, like magical properties, you weren’t able to deduce.

"I will have to ask Gale about this” you murmured to yourself. It was a pretty dark red colour, which reminded you of a certain pair of red eyes. You wondered whether his room was comfortable too. Knowing him, he was hoarding the best loot he found, not necessarily willing to share with the group. You sighed, put the ring down, and started looking through the possible junk pile that was on your bed.

After seperating the edible and not so edible foods, you were left with a bunch of papers, some more jewellery and some actually useful items, such as torches and a rope, that was hopefully not too decayed.

While you really wanted to just throw away the seemingly useless papers, you knew there might be some useful information for you. Maybe about the manor, or what happened to this place, or about the tadpoles. You knew there was only a slight chance for that, but you were grabbing onto every possibility.

Letter, letter, recepie for some food, another letter, oh, a juicy letter about someone cheating... Overall not so interesting. You were starting to get disappointed, when a title caught your eye: Shift in Vampirism. Curiously, you picked it up, and nervously ran your eyes over it. You have heard about a spell with the same name, but it was very rare, only a few people knew how to cast it. But against all odds, what you were holding in your hand was a scroll of that spell. Your stomach started sinking, as you clearly read the spell, where you can take over someones vampirisim, changing it for your normal, average traits.

You and Astarion had an interesting relationship. He flirted with you nonstop (but he kinda was doing that with everyone, so you tried to not take it too seriously), he drank from you when he got hungry, but was still so cold towards you, in a sense. Not that he excluded you, or was mean to you, but you felt like there was this invisible barrier he put up around him, and no matter how hard you tried, you were always shut out.

And you tried. A lot.

You would never share this with anyone, but you fell for Astarion basically as soon as you laid eyes on him. It was such a suprise, even to you, that you nearly let yourself be killed by him. Fortunately, soon it turned out you were in the same boat. And since then, you were trying to get to know him a bit more. You never did anything that could be understood as more than friendship – well, maybe apart from the flirting back, but that seemed to be a fun little game you two play – because you weren’t sure how he would take it. Worst case scenario, he would believe you also just want to use him for your own desires, and then he would push you away completely. You simply cared for him too much for this to happen.

But maybe with this spell, he would be more free. The pressure from his shoulders would lift a little bit, and he would be able to enjoy life more.

Your hands were shaking. You still needed some ingredients for the spell to work, this magic simply couldn’t fully be captured in just a scroll.

„Of course this spell needs candles” you sighed, then chuckled a little. As you got off your bed to collect said candles, you stopped for a second. Were you really doing this? Offering to take Astarions burden without a second thought? Wow, you must be charmed by him even more than you believed.

Your room had only one suitable candle, the others were mostly all used up, so you decides to look around once more, hoping that the the others didn’t cause such a big mess, that you wouldn’t be able to find a few more candles.

You were able to find just enough. You were also glad you didn’t bump into anyone during your adventure, and you didnt have to come up with a lie on why are you running around with an armful of candles.

You didn’t want to share the truth, because you were certain, the others would advise against it, maybe even actively try to stop you. They didn’t have the best opinion on vampires, and they were barely used to Astarion being one, and they always kept an eye on him, as if he would bite through their throats, given the right time. While he did joke about it, you knew he was secretly glad, he had some nice (or as he would say: „bearable”) company on this hard road to Baldur’s Gate.

But you couldn’t care whether the others will now eye you similarly or not. If it meant that Astarion would be free of his hunger, you gladly took all his spawn traits.

You dumped the candles on your bed, picked up the scroll and gathered the courage to show it to Astarion.

His room was a bit further away, but when you spotted the door, you were sure he choose that one. It was the most detailed out of the ones you saw while looting. „It must’ve been the master bedroom” you thought to yourself as you raised you hand to knock on the door. You still hesitated. The weight of what you held in your hand was starting to dawn on you.

„Come in, dont’t be shy” you heard his voice from the inside, before you could actually knock.

When you opened the door, you were greeted a room that was bigger than your home back in Baldur’s Gate. Astarion was standing in front of the fireplace, looking at the painting above it.

„You know them?” you asked, trying to sound casual. He was beautiful, no matter what he did. As if he was radiating some magic, you couldn’t take your eyes off of him. His hair looked silver in this light, and his eyes were focused on the family that was painted.

„Of course not! But looking at a painting is a better passtime, than doing nothing, or getting dirty in this dusty place.” he said, as he shifted his gaze to you. As your eyes locked, a shiver was sent down your spine, and for a split second, you forgot why you were there in the first place.

But you quickly collected yourself and witgout saying a word, you raised your hand towards him and offered him the scroll.

„What is this dear? Some juicy letters between the past owner and some lover?” he asked excitiedly. But you remained silent and just looked at him. You weren’t sure how you woukd even describe it. As he saw your seriousness, he went quiet too, and took the scroll.

„Just read it” you said, as he turned it around in his hand, seemingly unsure what to look for.

His brows furrowed as his eyes were going faster and faster over the lines. His concerned face made you worried.

„Is this a joke? I never thought you to be this cruel with me” he said to you, looking up from the paper. „If there actually was a spell like this, I would’ve heard about it, at least rumors.”

„It is a rare spell, I believed it was a legend, because a friend of a friend once saw it in action a long time ago. But this is a real thing.” you reassured him. His eyes lit up, as he took another look onto the scroll. You saw a glimpe of hope, but it was quickly replaced by something you weren’t sure about.

And then he started laughing.

„This is still cruel. This spell clearly exists to give false hope to people like me! Because who would even be so crazy to wish this up on themselves?” he asked and he held the scroll with two hands, with the intent of tearing the scroll with you.

„I would” you said firmly, trying to look into his eyes, looking for that little hope again.

He raised his gaze, and held eyecontact with you.

„Why?” he asked silently. You saw that he was truly confused. „Why would you want to go through these horrible stuff? Are you mad?”

„I’m not mad. I just want to...” but you couldn’t finish your sentence, because Astarion interrupted you.

„A favour? My life? You want to be able to hold control over me by taking over this burden I carry? Well thank you but no thank you! I would rather stay how I am if it means I am free from any puppet lines that make me do anything the puppeteer wants to!” he raised his voice.

„Astarion, I promise, I don’t...”

„You don’t want to control me? Of course, everyone would say that. But you? I thought you to be kinder than this. Especially after all those adventures, and everything I’ve ever told you about Cazador and my life in Baldur’s Gate! I thought of all people, you would be the one who would not even think about these stuff! Or was being understanding also part of the act?” he yelled by the end of the sentence.

Tears gathered in your eyes. You rarely if ever saw him this angry, and it hurt you so much. The barrier between you has never been so thick, so impenetrable.

„Please Astarion, hear me out...” you said, but your voice cracked as you said his name. However, Astarion was way too in his head to hear, or even see you.

„And what would you even say? Please trust me? Noone would take over my vampirism willingly, for nothing in return. And i don’t want to be in anyones debt! Feeding from you, it is already on a thin line, but it is something we both seem to enjoy. But this? You wouldn’t enjoy this” and he would have kept saying more and more harmful stuff, if you didn’t interrupt him. Once more.

„ASTARION” you also raised your voice. „I would do it because I care for you! I would do ir because... Because...”

„Because?”

„Because I love you” you closed your eyes. You couldn’t bear seeing his reaction. He most likely didn’t love, or even like you back. You weren’t even sure why you said it now. You planned to take this secret to your grave.

„And I care for you” you continued, as if trying to still explain yourself. „And you suffer so much already, and being a vampire seemingly makes it worse. Day by day, you put on the act of being a carefree man, but I feel like you have so many thoughts, fears you never even admit to yourself. If I could ease this pain by taking away something that is holding you back the most, maybe... Maybe you could live a better life. Maybe you would be able to heal from what happened to you.”

Your eyes were still closed. You waited for his reaction, but he was silent. A few painfully long seconds passed and then you heard his footsteps. You were afraid, they were moving away.

But then you felt his hands on both sides of your face. His thumb was caressing your cheek. He wiped a tear away. You didn’t even realize, that you started crying.

„Darling. Open your eyes.”

You slowly peeled your eyelids open. At first, you were looking down, somewhere at his chest. You felt embarassed. Confessing love was not your strong suit, as you have never done this before. Of course you had crushes here and there, maybe even a fling or two, but this overwhelming urge to be with someone, like you feel with Astarion, this was raw, honest, and heavy.

Astarion put his right hand under your chin, lifting your head to properly face him.

His eyes were like rubies, as he deeply looked into yours. There was no mockery in them, yet you still felt like you have to explain more. You tugged on his tadpole, and invited him into your mind.

You started sharing memories.

The first time you saw him, and how forgot to breathe for a second. Then he started speaking, asking for help, only to hold a knife to your throat later. Yet held no grudges against him. You now knew how confused he must have felt, and how vulnerable.

The night he first drank for you. Especially how scared he looked when you woke up. You were not repulsed by vampires, they didn’t choose to be turned into a spawn. You offered your blood, wanting nothing in return. The way he seemed more relaxed, more vibrant, more... alive after feeding, was enough for you.

That one time you thought he would die. It was an unfortunate ambush on you and the team. Astarion, as usual, was lurking in the shadows, but a rouge spell hit him square in the chest, and if Shadowheart wasn’t that good of a healer, he might not be here right now. Your heart ached as you held his hand, hoping his beautiful eyes would open once more. You screamed and cried your eyes out, trying to wake him up. And when he did, you gave him the first real hug that ever happened between you.

You looked away. These were some of your most sacred memories. You felt vulnerable.

„I... You don’t have to like me back. Just seeing you happy and free makes my life fuller. This is why i want to take your burden” you said quietly to him.

There was a second of silence again. They started to feel like you were cut with a knife. Painful anticipation.

„I don’t have to like you back?” Astarion said in a low voice, then chuckles a little. „It might be too late for that...”

You felt a familiar tug on your tadpole, as he was inviting you into his mind. You obliged.

You saw yourself through his eyes. He was taken aback by your presence. The kindess, with which you looked at him made him uneasy. He feared you would betray him the first chance you had. So he went ahead, and held a knife to your throat. And you still forgave him.

This is why he decided to drink from you. Maybe you wouldn’t be as mad as the others. And then you looked at him, and still wasn’t angry, and offered a drink. He felt something that could best be described as butterflies in his stomach. If his heart was beating, it wouldve bursted out fo his chest, he was sure.

And when he was hit by the spell, the only reason he held on was because he heard you. Felt your hand on his.

„This is why I can’t let you take this over” he again, turned your face towards his. „Because, I too, care about you deeply. And you don’t deserve to go though any of this. Especially what happens after we remove the tadpoles.”

„You suffered from it for two-hundred years. You deserve to rest now. And if you’re so adamant, you can search for one of those mages, who can perform this spell. Then you can take it back, if you want to” you said, now with a stronger voice. You knew just how rare the spell was, and doubted he would ever find anyone able to cast it. You were content with this.

„You would really do this... For me?” he asked gently, still unsure.

You nodded, allowing yourself to have a little smile too.

Then you felt his lips on yours. It took you by suprise. You didn’t even have to process that the feelings were mutual, and now he was kissing you.

After the initial suprise, you didn’t hesitate to kiss back. His lips were suprisingly soft and warm, and you wanted this moment to never end. You opened your mouth, allowing him to kiss you deeper. Astarion immediately understood your desire, and made his way towards your tongue. You felt his sharp fangs on your lips, but they felt exciting, if anything. You slowly wrapped your arms around him, hugging him closer than you ever did.

„Gods, how long I wanted to do this” he said, as he pulled back a little. You were lost for words. You still felt his mouth on yours, and you yearned for more.

But there was something more important that needed to happen, before you could properly explore your feelings towards eachother.

You slowly unwrapped yourself from him and picked up the scroll, which made its way on the floor sometime before.

„So, do you want to do this?” you asked, still short of breath. You handed him the scroll one more time. He took it, a briefly went over it.

„I can’t believe im saying this” he shook his head. „But yes. Let’s do this. And after it, I will track down all the scrolls and mages.”

As the sentences left his mouth, he already seemed to feel the pressure lifting. His shoulders seemed less tense and his forehead turned smooth.

You smiled at him shyly.

You went back to your room to collect the ingredients you needed. Your pouch had all the small ones, and you scooped up the candles you collected before.

You were excitied like a kid, which came to you as a suprise. You expected yourself to be scared of the ritual, especially knowing the details of the spell. But all you saw with your mind’s eye is Astarion, laughing carefreely.

„And with this” you stepped into Astarions room „we can finally start the preparations.”

He looked at you, and took a few of the candles off of you. Well, like four of them.

You laughed at him playfully, and he shot you a „i fucking dare you” look, which suited him just perfectly.

You set up the candles how it was desdribec on the scroll.

„Now we just need to mix the remaining ingredients with my blood, and paint up the Shifting Circle” you read through the instructions. You picked up your dagger and a bowl, and started investigating your arm.

„Darling, let me” Astarion took your arm and dagger. „As a vampire, I will have a much easier time finding the right place.”

„For now.” you murmured.

„Pardon?” he looked at you, pulling away a little.

„You won’t be a vampire for much longer.”

He laughed.

„You’re right, darling.”

He made a small cut on your arm. It was barely noticable, if not for the blood that was dripping down into a designated bowl. After the needed amount, Astarion patched you up, and put a bandage on your arm. He has never been so caring with you before.

You mixed together the dry and wet ingredients, and used it to paint up the shifting circle. It had two smaller circles incorporated: one Astarion, the giver, and one for you, the reciever.

You stood there, admiring your work. It wasnt perfect, but it should do it. It will do it – you thought to yourself.

„Lastly, I would need some rats” you said, and started to look for them. You heard them before, hopefully they haven’t fled yet.

„Rats? Why?” asked Astarion suprised.

„I will need it, because after I change, I will crave blood and if that hunger is left untreated, I might go feral” you explained. You weren’t keen on rats, but they seemed like the best option.

„Oh that won’t do” said Astarion, shaking his head. He came over to you and grabbed your clean hand. „You’re making such a sacrifice for me, the least I can do is offer my blood in return.”

You gulped. The thought of you drinking from Astarion the same way he drank from you sounded very intimate. You had to admit, it was to your liking.

„Thank you” you nodded. You were very touched by his offer. After what he went through, he still offered himself for a future vampire.

You sat in your circle and Astarion sat in his. He put his hands on the line, touching the mixture, as the spell instructed. You already lit all the candles that were neatly next to the lines, all around you. You opened up the scroll, but before reading it out loud, you looked at Astarion one more time. He gave you an encouraging half smile.

„O ipwuli vji nehod vu tipf vji wenqosi vseovt vu ni simoiwoph jon gsun jot cysfip!”

With every word, you felt a strange buzzing in the room. Magic was happening, and it did so all around you. At first, nothing happened. You were starting to get discouraged, the thought of the scroll being a fake bubbled up in your mind.

But then, suddenly the candle lights grew downwards, and all touched the big circle. Fire spread towards you and Astarion too. It was fast, too fast for any of you to react, and in no time, it reached the small circles.

In that moment, your bones, your skin, your blood also turned into fire. Pain shot from everywhere. It started burning you up, or at least it felt like that. You started screaming, and fell on the floor. You grabbed onto your arms, trying to get rid of the feeling.

Just next second, Astarion cried out too, but you weren’t sure if it was because he also was in pain, or because he saw you in such agony. You just hoped that he would remember to not stop touching the now burning mixture, as it was the connection between him and you.

You couldn’t wonder further, and a striking pain hit your mouth, specifically your teeth. You quickly moved your hands to it, half expecting them to simply fall out. You felt your canine teeth grow long and sharp. Just like the ones Astarion has. Had.

Suddenly nausea took you over. The dinner which you happily had before checking your loot, quickly made its way out of your stomach, as it was no longer suitable you. You were trembling, you felt that with this, you had nothing left, that was human.

The burning pain started to lessen. Your skin felt cold, your bones felt light. Your head was spinning, as you gathered yourself into a sitting position.

And then the hunger hit. The most primal hunger you have ever felt. As if you have not eaten for weeks. Your hunger was strong, and you wanted, no, you needed to feed. To feed on blood.

A strong, appetizing scent hit you. Before you realized what it was, your body started moving on its own. You basically crawled towards Astarion, who seemingly also had his fair share of the ritual, because he was lying on the floor, quickly breathing.

You crawled over him, and without a second thought, you bit him, and started drinking his blood. It tasted heavenly, like ambrosia. After the first drop on your tongue, you lost yourself even more. You ate, fed, as if you had never actually eaten before. You drank as if you just walked trough the driest desert.

He squirmed under you. Instinctively, you tried holding him down. More, more, MORE! The hunger can never be saited, you felt that. But temporarily, you just need more of his blood. More of his delicious, rich, glorious blood. More of... Astarions blood.

As this thought went through your head, you froze in place. Your animalistic instincts evaporated, you were yourself again. You slowly pulled away from Astarions neck. You feared the worst, as you looked down on him. He was not fighting back, just laid there, head turned to the side , for you to have better acces to him.

His movements were only to help you, not to shake you off.

Tears formed in your eyes. You knew that after the transformation, you would need to feed. You wanted to gently ask Astarion to bite his wrist, letting him dictate how much of him he gave to you. You didn’t plan for you losing control as soon as you turned.

Astarion turned his head towards you. His formally scarlet eyes were now a silverish blue. They looked breathtaking.

„I’m...” you started saying, but your words drowned in sobs. Blood was still dripping from his wounds.

„Hey. Shhhh. I’m alive” Astarion slowly sat up, and he wrapped his arms around you.

It felt like years of supressed stress and held back emotions just flowed out of you, like a tap, that hasn’t been opened in years. You clinged on him, and cried harder than you ever did. Transforming really took a toll on you, emotionally and mentally. The last drop was Astarion holding you gently but tightly. An act you only dreamt about before. Something you only imagined, a longing that kept you going in the hardest times.

Now, it was real. And you were absolutely overwhelmed by everything.

He held you until you calmed down. He didn’t say a word, but he didn’t need to. His gestures were telling enough for you.

„Your heart is not beating anymore” said Astarion, with a sharp sadness in his voice. You put your hand on your chest. He was right, you also felt no beating. It was unusual.

You put your hands on his chest. Under your palm, his heart was going wild and alive. You looked at him in detail. His eyes were the most striking change, but you noticed other parts too, that just made him look more... Alive. His cheeks gained some blush, he was not pale as a ghost anymore. His face looked more relaxed, more playful and youthful. He looked stronger, like someone who can handle everything.

He looked more beautiful, than ever.

„And your heart is about to jump out of your chest” you said, smiling for the first time since the ritual. You felt your fangs emerge from behind your lips. You quickly hid it behind your hand, as if it was something to hide.

Astarion clearly thought otherwise, because he smiled back at you, and carefully moved your hands down.

„Don’t hide them darling. They are nothing to hide. You thought me this. And trust me, you’re still beautiful. The most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”

His words caressed you. You allowed yourself to smile once more.

„Thank you” Astarion said with an honest voice. „I haven’t felt like this for... 200 years. And while I will search all corners of the world for the wizard, or any other cure, I can’t form the right words to properly say just how thankful I am for your actions. You’re the kindest soul anyone can ever meet. Most people would’ve stabbed me the first chance they had. Having someone like you by my side makes me feel... Safe. And I haven’t felt like thaf for a long time. And on top of that, we both seem to have fallen for eachother, which is just perfect. And I truly mean it.”

He looked into your eyes deeply before planting a sweet and hot kiss on your lips.

You stayed like that for a while.

Astarion, the not-so-pale elf, and you, the new vampire.