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lonely-lost-soul · 4 years ago

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Little Fox

(C!Fundy x Reader)

Request 12: Hey if you're making a request, do you do c!Fundy? If so, can I get a Fundy x half fox shapeshifter!reader where fundy finds an injured full fox!reader, and takes her home to patch her up without knowing that she's a shifter ówò? Context, the reader can shift into three forms: full fox, half and half(fox legs, tail, ears, fangs), and fully human. Thank you have a blessed day!!!

Requested By: Anonymous

Moving away from L’manburg or what was once L’manburg was one of the best decisions Fundy has ever made. Did it get lonely from time to time, sure, but at least he was finally at peace. He was away from his ghost of a father and away from the drama of everyone else fighting and the looming sense of death that lingered over everyone that lived in the once-prosperous nation. It was quiet and he was happy to be left alone, well, mostly alone. There was one exception, a snow-white fox that trotted around his house from time to time, curious (e/c) watching him with intent. He had always felt a connection to foxes considering he was part fox, he hated seeing them hurt or starving or treated with disrespect, so he kept them around. However the white fox didn’t seem to pay him any mind other than silently watching and wandering around his home, he started placing food out for the fox. This went on for a few months until one night something felt off. Fundy kept glancing out the window, almost like he was expecting to see someone but no one popped up until he remembered his little buddy. He didn’t know why it sent him so on edge, it was just a random arctic fox maybe it was the way the food was left untouched or the pull he felt to go the woods, but he grabbed his coat and stepped into the forest.

The first thing he noticed was the small animal prints littering the snow, there seemed to be some sort of scuffle. Worry entered his veins and his ears pressed flat against his head, he journeyed deeper into the forest and noticed little droplets of blood. Fundy adjusted his hat nervously and followed the blood droplets, crumpled on the ground in front of his feet was a blood-stained fox. The once pure white coat of the fox was stained with red splotches a big gash was torn from its side, Fundy felt nauseous. The wind seemed to blow against his exposed ears, almost urging him to pick up the fox and take it home. He reached out and picked the fox up in his arms and held it close, the wind blew again, his eyes widened a little in surprise, the wind seemed to whisper a thank you.

Back at the house he laid the fox down on his couch and began to patch up her wounds. Hopefully, she wouldn’t attack him in the morning, be too freaked out, he wrapped the bandages around the wound stopping the flow of blood. He just prayed his foxy friend would be alive come the morning light. Fundy flicked the lights off and went to sleep in his bedroom, even though all the windows were shut and locked tight he still felt that odd breeze tickle the tufts of his ears. ‘Take good care of her’ it seemed to whisper, his heart thudded in his chest as he snuggled under the covers. The morning sun streamed through his windows, blinding the hybrid slightly, he groaned loudly and sat up in bed. He ran his sharp nails through his hair tussling it a little bit, trying to calm the rat’s nest down. As snapped to consciousness fully when he noticed footsteps coming from his living room, very human-sounding footsteps. Fundy tensed and hopped out of bed storming into the room, a dagger in hand. He let out a startled shriek seeing a beautiful half-naked young woman standing in the middle of the room. However, he couldn’t even focus on that, he was more focused on the snow-white fox ears that sat atop her head, the fluffy tail behind her, and the fox-like legs.

She was like him.

“Fundy right?” She sent him a crooked smile, sharp fangs very visible, making him feel all types of things. “Names, (Y/n) and you saved my life last night.”

“You- Fox?! but- human-” His hands tangled in his orange hair mentally trying to come to terms with the fact that he had probably saved a forest spirit. “No shirt!” he sputtered feeling soft hands take his own, he noticed a smile on her lips, their eyes locked together,

“I’m a shifter. A pleasure to officially meet you.” He felt you squeeze his palms and he swallowed thickly,

“Shifter?”

He watched you nod tail swishing from side to side, you were very happy to be talking to him it seemed, Fundy felt oddly honored. “I have three forms! Full fox, half fox, and fully human,” You explained holding up three fingers on your hand. “Usually full fox is easier but as you can see,” You motioned to the bandages covering your chest, “it’s not without risks.”

“Hold the phone you’re telling me the fox I’ve been feeding-”

“Yup! That was me!” You giggled as his cheeks went red, “I appreciated it.”

“I gave you dog food! I’m so sorry, oh my god!” He sputtered out completely mortified by the situation. You let out a roaring laugh, it was very reminiscent of that of a fox but he supposed that, that made sense. He watched you dip your head and nuzzle underneath his chin, once again he felt his entire face burn red, your ears were so soft, the fur tickling his chin.

“It’s okay, I didn’t eat any of that. Just pretended.” You reassured lifting your head to once again meet his eyes. “Soooo...you gonna tell me your name? Or should I just call you handsome?” He felt the blush spread down onto his neck,

Oh no, she was so cute.

“Fundy! I’m Fundy.” He nodded more stiffly than he wanted too suddenly very aware of how close the both of them were to one another. You blinked after a few minutes peaking around his shoulder, oh shit was his tail wagging? A bright smile spread across your cheeks “Laugh it up okay! Not every day I get to have a cute fox girl nuzzle against me alright!” Your ears fell flat against your head, he watched pink spread across your cheeks, score.

“Cute?” You meekly whispered you pulled away a little to grab at your tail shyly, “Thank you.”

He was going to die, you were going to be the death of him.

After that first encounter, you, the real you, had become a staple of his life. You had moved with him a few days after showing your more human form to the hybrid. You knew how to cook which made him swoon, it tasted divine, he was tired of being alone. You made him feel like he still had hope, you were his family now even after only knowing you for such a short amount of time. There was an odd sort of bond the two of you had, he was happy to have someone understand him, on a level that no one has ever been able to before, especially not his father. Days rolled into weeks and weeks turned into months, it was about eight months in when Fundy finally confessed to you.

You’d spent the day away from home, in your full fox form, saying you needed to stretch your legs and Fundy let you go. That didn’t mean he wasn’t a mess all day worrying about your well-being all day, he barely could get anything done, so when he saw your white fur streak through the trees that night he knew you were home. He ran out onto the stones of the path and called out your name, he watched your ears twitch and turned towards him. He felt his tail begin wagging ecstatically and he could see yours begin to do the same, you charged headfirst towards him shifting as you run, as you arrived he held out his arms and you jumped right on in them. He felt your arms wrap around his neck as he lifted you into the air. He spun you around as he laughed,

“I missed you, Dee!” You purred out happily leaning back a little bit in his arms, he still held you above the ground.

“I missed you too Dearheart,” Fundy whispered looking up at your sparkling eyes it was then, with your white fur shining in the moonlight that he realized he was in love with you. “(Y/n)?”

“Hm?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Please.” You breathed out softly, cheeks pink, ears twitching, “I’d like that very much.”

So, he did.

Two years being together of being together was finally when Wilbur- or ghostbur- decided to visit his son. You were outside in the garden, tending to some of Fundy’s vegetables deadset on using some of the fresh ones to make soup for tonight. You were in your human form so you didn’t get your white fur covered in dirt, so you didn’t hear the ghost coming close to the house until he was leaning over your shoulder.

“Hello!”

You screamed like a little kit throwing your basket through the ghost who shivered at the foreign feeling.

“Sorry, sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you!” The ghost apologized adjusting the round glasses on his face. “I heard my son Fundy lives around here but I must be mistaken!”

“Are you...you’re Wilbur aren’t you?”

“Oh! You’ve heard of me! Was it my music, please say yes!” The ghost’s eyes seemed to sparkle with hope, he shrunk a little as he watched you shake your head, “oh…”

“I’m-”

“(Y/n)! I heard you scream, you alright?” Fundy peeked his head out the door eyes going big seeing his dead father standing beside you. Wilbur looked between the both of you before a tiny smirk spread across his face,

“Ohhhhhh, I see now.” Wilbur nodded watching his son’s face go red, “My little champion is all grown up! With a beautiful human to mind you!”

“Er...not exactly.” You mumbled, allowing your ears and tail to pop up from your head, Wilbur’s jaw dropped in shock and awe.

“She’s like you!” Wilbur gaped reaching up to touch your ears, you flinched a little, and Fundy snarled at his father. “Sorry, sorry,” He pulled his hand back with a sheepish smile Fundy finally walked over to the both of you, pushing you behind him only slightly.

“What’re you doing here dad?” His voice was gruffer than you’ve ever heard it, his tail was puffed up in a way you’ve never seen before from your boyfriend.

He was on edge.

Wilbur shuffled a little fumbling with a piece of something blue in his hands. “I just wanted to check up on my son. No one’s heard from you for a while we’re all getting a little worried. I love you so-”

“Dad.” He groaned pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose pinching it, “look. I appreciate you’re all worried but I’m happier here.”

“But you’re all alone out here! It’s not good for anyone’s health, especially not a young fox!”

“Excuse you?” Your eyes narrowed in offense, “I lived out here all my life.” You bristled in frustration, “I turned out fine.” Wilbur eyed you warily and Fundy squeezed your palm tightly, “I did!”

“I didn’t mean any offense. I’m just looking out for my son.”

“No offense but I think he can look after himself just fine.” You shot right back and Fundy covered up a surprised laugh, “So far so good. Plus he’s not alone, I’m with him.” You squeezed Fundy’s hand rather tightly, as Wilbur glanced at your intertwined hands.

“What she said.” Fundy nodded his head, “we have each other and that’s all we need. At least for right now. So try not to worry too much.” He waved his dad off, “Now if you don’t mind we have dinner to cook.” Wilbur gave a hesitant nod before turning back to look into your eyes,

“Don’t hurt him.”

“I don’t plan on it," You assured nodded your head you both had a brief staring contest before Wilbur said his official goodbyes and headed on his way. “I’m sorry,” Fundy watched your ears fall flat against your head.

“What for?” Fundy’s brows furrowed in concern, “He was being an ass, you had every right to defend yourself. Plus I hate him so.” He shrugged unbothered, “I love you though.” He pecked your cheek and you smiled shyly.

“I love you too Dee.” You spoke softly, pulling him close by his jacket, his tail began to wag enthusiastically.

“Kiss?”

“Kiss.” You nodded standing on your tiptoes to give him a long kiss, he purred tangling his fingers through your hair. You pulled away much too soon for his liking and let out a low whine, you giggled happily and peppered his face in light kisses. “Fundy?”

“Hm?”

“Let’s get married.”

“What?”

~~~

Next Up: Immortality and Nymphs Part II

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queen-of-my-goofball-army · 4 years ago

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Undiagnosed Autism-spectrum disorder in The Michells Vs The Machines

I'm sure that more well educated people have put two and two together in this film but I really, really want to put my own spin on it from my experience. For me, as an aspie, film is one of my biggest interests. I love studying and more than anything I love watching and rewatching films. My latest favorite movie was one that I just watched last night for my family movie night, The Michells Vs The Machines. I also went 17 years of my life asking myself the same question that both Rick and his daughter ask each other, what is wrong with him/her?

Well, I'll tell you, in my firmly undiagnosed autistic opinion for far too long, that this family is full of people with undiagnosed autism spectrum disorder. When I was watching it with my parents my mom made the comment that "the dad was a jerk" and maybe "he just didn't love his daughter enough to let her be her own person." I thought that was so not seeing the bigger picture even though it was only fifteen minutes into the film. I have felt like Katie so much with my own dad. My dad is a computer nerd and a physics major for those of you that don't talk to me very often. That means in laminas terms that he's extremely smart. Way smarter than I will ever be in my entire life. Both of my parents are insanely smart in their own rights. My mom is a CPA accountant. But that isn't what I wanted to talk about here. I want to discuss the effect of undiagnosed autism and what it can do to a whole family when they all have it and just don't know that they do. This will probably go on for quite some time so you may stop here or read below the cut because this also has the probablity of getting super, duper personal.

We'll start with Katie! To me, Katie is one of the most relatable characters that I have ever come across. She's a film nerd, which alone has made her supremely relatable as somebody who is thinking about going into a degree in film studies. I am more of a critic of film than somebody who wants to make her own film but nonetheless, there were SO many little moments that I related to. The first thing that I personally noticed and related to was the stimming technique that Katie has. She chews on her hoodie strings. As somebody who has chewed on the drawstrings of hoodies far too often long before I was officially put into the Aspergers box. Aspies are also known to stick with one "special interest" for the rest of their lives if it's one that is wide enough and varied enough to make it applicable. For Katie, that's film. For me that's animation. I appreciated that little detail of most of her dialogue being references to other films because as a lover of films and movies in general I could go for days on just fumes and movie references that nobody else understands. The little things from her hair being perpetually messy (same that's a whole ass mood like I just learned over quarantine how to tye my own hair back), only having one earring in her ear at all times, the way that she dresses and draws on her own hands, this was just me when I was first in high school. I was one of the few people that wore shorts underneath all my skirts/dresses. Everyone who knew about looked at me like I had grown a third eyeball.

Aaron, the younger brother, also just oozes spectrum lil buddy out of his every pore from his being. I do think that they should have picked somebody capable of doing a bit of a younger sounding voice (I know what they were going for, but like Ben Schwartz has become a huge deal in both voice acting and live action before switching mediums.) His special interest is actually quite a common one, he loves dinosaurs. I've met a bunch of people on the spectrum that are fascinated by dinos and what they meant for the world as well as the universe as a whole. To me, there was one scene specifically that was the scene where Katie was lightly teasing him when they were going to the half assed dinosaur extravaganza. For me, this was SO relatable because both of my parents will mess with me about my interests most of the time it's when we go to Disneyland, they'll tell me that we actually aren't going to land of magic but to Timbuckto (hopefully one day they'll say some place else just to switch things up.) I related so hard to Aaron's protesting and whining in this scene since that is always my reaction to doing something that I want to do but get told that I can't do that thing.

Linda is more of your traditional mom but I think that she's on the spectrum as well. Just a more... normalized version as opposed to her family. She's able to be a teacher, she's able to interact somewhat normally around her neighbors. If anything, she reminded me of my own mom. This independent, takes nobody's trash (especially not her husband's), strong minded, and amazing mother who is completely in control of everything. She knows the special interests of her children and is constantly thinking of what will make them happy. Whether it be taking a detour for something dinosaur related, reminding her daughter that her dad loves her no matter what, and even something as simple as watching something that her daughter made and put her heart and soul into. I can't tell you how many times my mom has watched something with me. She watched my first anime Soul Eater with me when I was 12 and ever since then has been trying to get me to watch other shows with her. She's a lot like Linda, your loving, but firm mother who just wants her family to work things out.

Whew boy. This one is going to be probably where I cry. Comparing my dad to Rick is... something that I did consistently when I was watching the film. He's the strong but silent type usually, unless your me and he's just this constant annoyance when I'm trying to do something. He could be seen as just a "Jerk" but I think that is the undiagnosed aspie talking. Rick and Katie just struggle so hard to see eye to eye because their special interests can't intersect to save their lives. This, this hurt me because so often I struggle to relate to my dad. Especially when he talks to me about computers or physics. Now I took physics but without having been in quarantine and having him as my live in tutor I would have failed, not gotten an A. This has resulted me in saying things that I don't mean in the heat of the moment when we do argue. It doesn't happen nearly as much as it used to back when I was in middle school but when it happened it was because of one thing. I lied. I used to lie a lot because I felt so unworthy of being his daughter because on my best days I am not technically smart. You want to know how many nations of the world there were in 1991 when the original Animaniacs was airing? You want to hear my Dot Warner impression? Did you ever wonder how to recognize a specific voice when your watching anime? Have you ever had to watch a panel of your favorite anime voice actor just to laugh at something? No, well I did. But ever since I have started taking a quarter off from community college I have realized something. I am not technically smart. I struggle at learning the rules for math. My dad can do this with his eyes closed but me, I struggle and look like a complete moron. It took years for my dad and I to see eye to eye. Sometimes I still wonder if I was the product of some laboratory experiment of what would happen if two intelligent people came together, fell in love, and expecting that the daughter was smart I was the reject. Watching this movie with my dad I saw so much of my relationship with him on the screen. Struggling to relate to one another, fighting and getting into arguments about petty things, and not being able to be in the same room as one another without heated words because I didn't get him.

The scene that I related to the most when it was in terms of how much Katie just doesn't understand her dad was after he was nabbed by the machines. When Aaron asked her why she said those things to their dad and her simple answer was "I don't know." This. This right here was when I saw me. So many times I've gotten into heated arguments with my dad when he has simply annoyed me at the wrong time and I've just blown up in his face. Then I regret my actions and not know how to apologize for losing my temper with him because "I don't know" just doesn't seem like a nearly acceptable answer. I felt this in my soul because it happened especially often before I was diagnosed.

When I was diagnosed, things started to get better with my dad and I. We haven't had a fight in nearly four years now. He watches cartoons with me now to try and relate to me, it's mostly Pinky and The Brain but it's more than I could have ever asked for. I love my dad so much, more than anything in the entire world. This movie is so, so good at telling a story about how a family of undiagnosed aspie's and people on the spectrum struggle to relate to one another because their special interests are different.

Special interests and family's are especially difficult and I applaud this movie so loud because of the way that it was able to treat the subject matter with integrity and honesty. I'm sorry if this analysis got a little bit long in the toof but thank you for sticking with me! I really hope that if you watched the film you loved my analysis.

#the mitchells vs the machines #aspergers #movie analysis #denki shut up #nobody cares about your emotional backstory #long post #this took me over an hour because I kept crying

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niksfics · 4 years ago

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↬ FATE

↬ PAIRINGS: kenma x f!reader (side aka rebound mention) miya atsumu x f!reader

↬ WARNINGS: a whole lotta angst, breakup, it’s an online relationship, kenma is cold and hurts ur feelings

↬ SUMMARY: your relationship with kenma really had felt like the last one. He was it, turns out he didn’t have similar feelings.

↬ A/N: alright loves!! This isn’t proofread at all it’s 2 in the morning I’ll edit when I wake up, butttt Thanks to my lovely ex girlfriend you are now being graced with this steaming pile of trash. (Lovely was not meant sarcastically at all she is in fact very lovely.) Ngl almost, if not all of this story is about my relationship with my ex gf. This is how I cope people. ￫ It’s taken me awhile to actually be able to right something that’s why things kinda stopped. Tbh after she broke up with me it’s been very hard for me to write so hopefully this helps! And I hope you enjoy!! I would also just like to say if it feels a lil weird it’s cause these are things I’ve actually written in my notes I tweaked it a little to fit the story but it’s straight from the source 😩

WC | 2.5K

You sighed as you opened your notes app. Your eyes scanning over all of the little facts and quirks he had told you about himself. All the stuff you’d wanted to remember. The stuff that had seemed so important to you before. Now it was meaningless, almost like facts about a stranger. Almost as if you hadn’t spent four months learning about and growing with eachother.

You scrolled down a little bit right under, how his favorite marvel character is Spider-Man and you chewed on your lip. Your fingers hovering above the keyboard on your phone. You looked over the facts again. The things he dislikes and the stuff he adores, the things he likes to collect to the way he feels passionately about a certain topic. You begin to type.

Friday June 25th 2022 12:22 Am

I cried again tonight, because I still love you. It’s been a month and six days since we broke up. It feels like there’s a hole in my chest. You seem to be doing fine though, so I’m happy for you! This is the second time since we’ve broken up that I’ve felt actual physical emotional pain in my chest. Remember when I told you how bad it hurt after we broke up? Remember how you didn’t even ask if I was ok? Didn’t even bother to answer. Do you remember that? I remember. I’ve thought about it every day since. I remember it being so bad I genuinely thought I was having a heart attack. Wasn’t until I’d called tetsu crying that he’d told me it was just emotional and I should probably try to relax.

I read through our old messages. I’ve never wanted something back so bad. Never wanted to beg anyone to stay till now. I wish you loved me like I love you. I wish I hadn’t grown so attached, wish I hadn’t fallen so deeply into love with you. I wish it wasn’t my fault that we broke up. I wish I wasn’t so fucking scared. I wish I was fearless. Wish I could rise into love bravely. I wish I was brave when it came to you. I keep telling myself it was me. It was me not you. You didn’t love me anymore. You don’t love me anymore and you’re just too nice to say that. So you told me in the only way I could handle. Except you hadn’t used the words you should have. You got bored. We both know it’s true. You were bored of it, and I don’t blame you. I know we’ll never talk again, and part of me is so glad. Another part of me forces myself to read through all our messages though. I wish I could just tell you one last time. I love you.

You sighed saving it before closing out of it. Tears you hadn’t known were falling finally became known to you as they streamed down your cheeks. Your eyes puffy as you wet your lips, the salt of them coating your tongue. You were bitter and so were your tears. I briefly wondered what he was doing right now. Probably playing a video game. You knew his schedule all to well by now. Probably testing out a new game for his stream.

A new set of fresh tears fell as you remembered how you used to call him right before he went on. Being lulled to sleep by his occasionally curses and the clicking oh his controller or his keyboard.

You never expected things to end this way. You really thought he was the last one. Yes it had only been four months, but the way he made you feel. The way that it had felt. It had felt final, and you’d been friends before you even started dating.

You sniffle moving yourself to the kitchen to poor yourself a glass of water as you remembered how nervous you were when you first texted him. You had acumulated quite the crush on him back in high school. As Inarazaki’s manager you were required to go to the games, and even after your team lost you had stuck around. Watched him play and cheered him on. Two weeks later you had begun to text, as friends of course. It wasn’t until four months ago that you’d gotten together.

Your anniversary was only two days prior to your break up. You both had never been one to even care about that stuff. You had agreed early on in the relationship that we wouldn’t do anything due to the distance, and the business of our schedules. You were never one for remembering things like anniversaries anyways.

He really did feel like the one. Sometimes you just know. Sometimes you can just feel it. Like, you know that feeling you get when you know something is off or you know for sure something is about to happen even without being told it’s going to. That’s what it felt like to be with kozume kenma.

You thought you knew, you thought this time, this time its for real. You thought it was finally safe to say, that he was the one. You both had even admitted to looking for each others initials in those stupid soulmate tik tok videos.

You were finally in a mature relationship with someone you could talk about anything to. You had gotten so caught up in it, that you didn’t even see the end creeping up on you.

↝

You’d finally gained the courage to text him again. Unfortunately it was in a drunken daze. Your hands shaking as you fumbled with your phone typing things you’d come to regret in the morning. You’d sent him a series of texts telling him how much you missed him, how you didn’t understand how he was so okay. You had been a wreck that night. One of your friends puking in her toilet as you cried. You were happy of course that he was doing so well, but you’d been a wreck for so long and he hadn’t even changed. You told him you wished you could be okay.

When you’d awoken the next morning hair knotted in a complete mess and wiping drool from your chin your heart had sunk even lower. His response was cold. You knew that kenma could be cold. You knew that it was just who he was, but this particular text had felt so unfeeling and unfamiliar, it was as if he hadn’t even sent it himself. He had only ever talked like this to you once and that was when you first became friends all those years ago.

Kozume ❤️

Hey, it’s okay. And yeah you see what I choose to put up. I could be better. But I choose to stay optimistic and busy. Sorry that things are this way.

You had never seen so many periods in a text before. He only used grammar like that when he was peeved, and maybe you were wrong, maybe he’d done that on purpose, but it had hurt so bad. It had caused an ache so deep in your chest that you weren’t sure if you’d ever even dated him at all.

Yeah.

It was the only thing you could bring yourself to respond back with. How were you supposed to respond to that? You’d stared at it for so long and after you’d sent it you wished you had said more. Wished you would’ve said something more insightful than a simple, heartbroken, “yeah.”

Not too long later there was another ping and you held your breath. His name briefly appearing across your screen.

Yeah. I could be better. But I hope you do well soon. I’m sorry that I can’t really do much to help out

And of course you did the only thing you could do. Deflect. Pretend like you hadn’t said what you’d said not even fourteen hours ago.

No it’s fine. I’m fine. You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry that you could be doing better.

He left you on seen. You knew you sounded like an asshole. At least to you, you felt like an asshole. Why couldn’t you have come up with something else. Why couldn’t you tell him the truth. Tell him how you felt. Tell him that you didn’t think you should be broken up anymore. That the month long cruel joke was over and you were ready to spend your nights falling asleep to him playing video games again. You didn’t though, and you never would. You’re not brave enough, too prideful to even try.

You swallowed down the bile rising in your throat as you realized even if you did beg him. Begged him to take you back. Tell him that you still love him. You were too late, and you just couldn’t be selfish when it comes to him. He is over you and it was so plainly obvious. You know that deep down. Know that he’s moved on, and it kills you inside. So you did the only thing you could do. Try and put it into words.

So as you lay in bed the warm body you let occupy your space sound asleep beside you, his toned blonde hair tousled slightly and you sighed. Finally away from the shenanigans of your friends you took a deep breath before you closed your eyes.

You opened up your notes app again and scrolled past the last entry. You swallowed again as you blinked the tears out of your eyes. Your thumbs beginning to move before you even gave them permission.

Wednesday June 30th 2022 1:39 Am

Here I am again. Stuck. Stuck in the same place I’ve been for so long. You know, I write so beautifully when I’m broken. I’m most of my best work is written when I’m being torn apart. But I just, I can’t seem to find the words. I can’t seem to put it into a document and turn out little story into a different story to cope. Can’t seem to write it out. Can’t seem to move on.

I hovered over the unfollow button on your page today, to keep myself from scrolling through your things again. To keep myself from getting hurt. So I don’t have to be reminded. I want to delete it. Delete where we officially met. On a chat through my screen. I wanna wipe the messages clean. And I’ve tried. Oh how I’ve tried. But I can’t.

I want to delete our conversations. The hours long talks we had, but then, what happens afterwards? What keeps the memories alive. I’d never been so in love with someone before. I’ve never actually…. Been in love before. I thought I’d been in love, but it didn’t feel like that, and losing them never hurt like this. Losing someone has never hurt this bad before.

I’ve never felt the emptiness you left so deep in my very being with anyone I’ve ever met before. I can’t seem to pull myself together. And it’s pathetic I know. It’s pathetic that I’m still here. In the same place I was a month ago. It’s about to be two months we’ve haven’t been together. I’m hurting. Hurting so bad. It’s painful to look at you.

I haven’t deleted the photos even though I probably should. They’re still tucked away in an album in my camera roll labeled “us <3” the one one I made specially just for you. The way I’d been so excited when I was finally ready to tell my friends. I even have this stupid notes folder from when we were dating where I wrote all the little things about you that I never wanted to forget. I find you so endearing. Everything you do. I just couldn’t help but right it down to keep it safe so it never leaves my mind. So that I never forget. But now, forgetting is all I want to do.

I never thought there’d be a time in my life where I was more emotionally stunted that I normally. So stunted I can’t even put this, our split up, into words. Make it something entertaining for somebody else to read. Write a book about it. My publicist keeps asking when the sequel for my book will be done. I don’t know if it’ll ever be finished. I can’t do the one thing I’ve always been good at. I’m crying as I write this.

And I wish it would just end here in this little notes app. Wish the love would die in here. I always think I’m over you and then I see you again, and nowadays your everywhere. A very big hit and I’m happy for you and your success, but seeing you makes my heart squeeze in my chest.

I think I’m over you until I play that stupid fucking game that causes me to scream at my phone, or my laptop in frustration, but I just can’t seem to delete it because I know it’s something that you love. That show we used to talk about. I know you know which one, I can’t seem to watch it without thinking of what was. You’ve ruined it forever cause now it only reminds me of you. I know you’ll never see this, but I like to imagine you can. That my time for closure has somehow come.

When you told me you were sorry that things were this way, it was a real slap in the face. It stopped my false hope. My wishing. It all came to a halt. I’m glad. Glad that you’re happier. That you’re better without me. But god, now I’m so fucked up and I can’t even talk to you.

You were the only person I had left. The only one who understood me. And now you’re gone. You took a part of me with you that night. A part that I’ll never get back. I should’ve known that you would leave. I’ve never been able to get someone to stay for longer than three to four months.

I thought I could let my guard down though. I thought we were in the clear. I’d thought finally. Finally someone is gonna stay. I thought you were my person. I still think that to this day. I thought we were gonna make it. And now I’m with this guy I don’t even like. He’s not you, he doesn’t act like you. He doesn’t like video games like you do.

He doesn’t talk to me like you do. Like you did. But you know how it ended I don’t need to put it here. Unfortunately I’ll always love you even if you don’t love me. This is so scattered, I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy.

With that you closed the app and put down your phone. Plugging in it and as it dinged miya atsumu rolled over in his sleep. He reached for you his hands wrapping around your waist to tug you against his strong body.

His gravely voice whispering through sleep, “mmm finally decided to come to bed?” You hum moving an arm under on of his to wrap around his thin waist. “Mhm, thought you might need the company.” You began to draw little shapes and letters against his back as he chuckled, “oh yea? How thoughtful of you princess.”

Suddenly it was quiet and your closed eyes opened to his wide brown ones, his eyebrows furrowing .

“Did you just spell kozume on my back?”

156 notes · View notes

forever-rogue · 4 years ago

Text

Step into the Daylight - Part 12

Summary: Crafting, whispered declarations, and a newcomer lead to some interesting revelations.

A/N: Thank you guys for being so, so patient and still being excited for me to update. Taglists are open, and as always feedback is welcome! xx

Pairing: Din Djarin x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 4.5k

Warnings: general s2 spoilers, and canon divergence (hehehe)

SERIES MASTERLIST

MANDALORIAN MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

“So I’m going to make that,” you glanced at Cal’s glowing green lightsaber with a furtive point of your hand, “from this?”

The small Kyber crystal felt pathetic and pointless in your hand as you looked between it and the lightsaber. It seemed like surely the one couldn’t truly come from the other. How was the dinky little crystal going to power up such an advanced weapon?

“Of course,” Cere offered you a kind smile and a warm hand on your back as she ushered you over to the workbench at the back of the Mantis, her ragtag crew’s ship, “all the materials and items you need to craft your own saber are right there. The most important of it all, the key, is the small crystal in your hands. Have faith in it - and yourself - and you’ll be able to do it.”

“O-on my own?” your eyebrows shot up as she nodded, “how will I know what to do? I’m not dumb...but I don’t see how one equates to the other.”

“You will know,” she insisted, taking a step back and motioning for Cal to join her. Your eyes were wide with worry and concern as you were positive that this was a task you would never be able to complete. Maybe this was all a mad joke, and they were somehow testing you? But then again...surely they couldn’t be. Few things you’d learned about the Jedi and the Force made sense and this was definitely one of them. You were beginning to wonder if anything ever would make sense.

But your instinct, your gut or whatever it was, had gotten you this far. It had kept you, Din, and Grogu safe. Maybe there was something to it after all. Maybe now wasn’t the time to question it.

“Alright,” you nodded in quiet agreement, “I’ll try my best.”

“We will see you when you’re ready,” with that she turned and left, with Cal close on her heels after he gave you a wave of goodbye. Nodding to yourself you decided that you might as well just try and see where it led you.

“Okay,” you whispered to yourself as you put the crystal in the center of the bench, “let’s give this a go then.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

It was several frustrating hours before you emerged from the Mantis, dirt and oil on your face, but more importantly, a giant grin. You quickly found yourself surrounded by several pairs of curious, prying eyes. The most important of all were inky black and accompanied by a happy little coo.

"How did you fare, young one?" Cere asked you as you reached behind your back and slowly pulled out what looked like a black metallic tube, covered in intricate golden designs.

"You tell me," without a moment of hesitation or pause, you ignited the saber and displayed the brilliant, glowing golden beam of light. Before anyone could say anything you wielded it and displayed the other end, showing that you had crafted a dual ended saber, "ta da!"

"Golden," Cal mused as he came closer and studied the saber, impressed by your ability to create such an impressive thing on your first try, "I've only seen one other person with such a color…"

"Should I have chosen a-a different one?" your brows knitted in confusion as you disengage the saber and clipped it onto your belt loop, "is there a way to change it?"

"No," he shook his head in amusement, "the Kyber chooses us and the color. It's nothing on your part."

"Oh...well, I'll take it as a good thing then," you cast a look over at Din and Grogu who were both watching your every move intently. You felt your cheeks warm up under his gaze, but a smile still graced your features, "golden...what does it mean?"

"Balance," he answered simply, "the balance between light and dark."

"O-oh," you swallowed thickly as you realized just how much it meant it, "wow."

"Wow is right," Cere game over and gave your shoulder a gentle squeeze, "you've done well. The art of wielding it is another thing. But you will learn, over time. There is no right - or wrong - way to do it. You'll have to find out what feels right to you."

"Thank you," giving her a nod of reverence, an odd feeling washed over you. It was all done now - your journey of finding your crystal and your building of the saber. This is where you parted ways. It was a lonely idea, a scary one at that, but you knew you'd still have Din and Grogu. That was all you really needed - anything else world work out.

Like it always seemed to.

"I believe this is the parting of the ways," she sounded almost disappointed as you inhaled deeply. Although you hadn't known them long, you felt as though there was a deep bond between your small clan and their crew. Like yourself and Grogu, Cal and Cere, and in some ways Merrin, shared a special bond with you. They were probably some of the only people that knew exactly what you were going through; especially the push and pull between light and dark.

“Indeed,” you slowly made your way over to Din, who gave a small nod of acknowledgment as Grogu reached out for you. Gently taking him in your arms, you kissed the top of his fuzzy head before positioning him so he could see everything, just like he pleased, “where will you go?”

“Wherever we’re needed,” Cal seemed as cryptic as his mentor, but you knew that despite trusting you, it was best for their own interests to kept their whereabouts as secret as possible, “I have not doubt that there are plenty of others just like you and I that are out there, and they’re scared and need help. We’re just going to go around and keep finding them, and helping them. So that way they can hone their own powers, just like you.”

“I’m sure they will be more than thankful for your help,” you said as Grogu cooed in agreement, “just like we are. I hope our paths cross again one day, Cal Kestis.”

“As do I,” he held out his hand and you grabbed it, giving it a firm but gentle shake. The energy that flowed between the two of you was enough to prompt a small sound of surprise from your lips; the force really was a strange, but wonderful thing, “until next time.”

“Until next time,” you repeated as you stood back and rejoined Din. A hand went to your side as he led you close to him. And then you realized - “wait! Jele - what about you? Are you going to come with us?”

For the first time since your reappearance, you really noticed the older woman watching you curiously. She offered you a warm smile, much as the others had done before shaking her head lightly, “unfortunately, our time is over, and I’ve found a new calling. I’m going with them, hopefully to use the skills I have remaining for good use. Just like with you. There’s nothing left for me to teach you, young one. Everything else will come to you in time, you will be ready for when it does.”

“Thank you,” tears pricked at the back of your eyes as you nodded in understanding, “for everything.”

“There’s nothing to thank me for,” she insisted, “everything’s always been within you, everything plays out as it should. Sometimes it just needs a little push in the right direction.”

A playful little grin crossed her features as she glances at you and Din in turn. Your cheeks warmed up at the mere thought of kissing him the previous evening, of finally getting to see him, of the whispered declarations of love, and what it all meant. Clearing your throat, you gazed at your feet awkwardly to hide your warm face, “well, regardless. Thank you. For everything.”

“May the force be with you.”

“And with you.”

The three of you remained there for some time, watching as the others gathered their things and packed up the Mantis to leave. It was strange to watch them leave, it almost felt wrong; they were new friends, fast friends but it felt wrong to see them go so soon. Something told you this wasn’t the last you’d see of them.

“We should go in,” Din finally said after some time, his voice cracking lightly from how long he had been silent. It wasn’t that he had been worried about you while you were crafting your blade like he had been when you were on your quest for the crystal, but he was...nervous. Din knew you were more than capable of handling yourself, but at the same time he couldn’t help but fret over your safety. He loved you, truly, fully, and completely - he knew that now. Since he’d had the privilege of knowing a life with you, he wasn’t sure he could handle one without you.

Shivering in response, it was only mere moments before Din had whipped his cape off from his shoulders and placed it around your own. You turned to him with a thankful smile before shaking your head in amusement, “what about you, my love? Now you’re going to be cold.”

“Not terribly if we move inside and warm up the Crest,” he snorted in amusement before moving in the direction of the ship just behind the snowy horizon, “come on, let’s go before we freeze.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

It was warm inside, the forced air was blasting and making the whole ship more comfortable. It really was the only way to combat the freezing chill of Illum. You’d showered and changed into something more warm and comfortable, and once you’d returned to the small living space, you’d found that Din had tucked Gorgu back into his small hammock. You watched the small green little bean fondly for a moment before gently stroking his ears and the top of his head.

“Hungry?” you stopped at the sound of the voice that reached your ears. It was familiar and known to you, yes, but there was a part of it that was still more or less unknown. Dropping your hand, you turned and found Din watching you, his brown eyes meeting yours, “I-I made some food.”

“Y-yes,” you nodded, swallowing the lump that had welled up in your throat before walking over to him. Din stood there for a moment as you studied him; but then silently, tentatively, you reached up and cradled his face in your hands. He practically keened into your touch as you traced over his features, before leaning closer to him, the tips of your noses lightly brushing, “is this okay?”

"Yes," his voice was gentle as his warm breath fanned across your face, somehow causing you to lean forward and gently brush your lips against his. Din's hands found purchase on your waist as you breathed him in and familiarized with this - the sheer, wonderful act of intimacy, "may I kiss you?"

"Please," you barely whispered the word before he closed the gap and gently pressed his lips against yours. His touch and taste were intoxicating, despite being so simple and pure. It wasn't much, a few mere seconds passed as you both tested the waters to see how it would go. Not that there was any lingering doubt in your mind that you loved him, but it was all still so new and threatened to send you into an overwhelmed headrush all at once.

There was something so saccharine and sacred about kissing him, about knowing he was yours and you were his, that was too much and not enough at once. Your eyes closed as you rested your forehead against his, lips pulling into a small smile.

"What are you thinking?" you asked softly when you found inquisitive brown eyes searching your face for...something.

"I like this," his cheeks flushed slightly as his fingers danced around your waist, "I've never done this before, let someone see me like this, but I just…"

"Feel like this is right?" you finished as he nodded softly, "I don't know what it is either, Din, but I feel it too. I like to think that...there's a reason you found me and saved me that day. I'm glad you did."

"Even though you tried to fight me off?"

"Even though I tried to fight you off!" you pulled back and laughed, that wonderful sound that made Din's insides flutter happily, "I thought for sure you were going to turn me in. I...couldn't trust you or anyone then."

"And now?"

"I trust you with my life," you promised, "you are my home. You and Grogu."

“I’ve never…” Din paused for a long moment before closing his eyes and gently stealing another kiss from you, lingering against your lips. You were so close, but not close enough; part of you wanted to swallow him whole and keep him as yours forever, “I’ve never felt this way about anyone. I’ve never loved anyone. Not before…”

“Him?” your voice was soft as you pulled back and cast a fond glance at the sleeping child. Din followed your gaze before training it right back onto you, “I can understand that. I love him too. Have you never...loved another?”

“No,” he admitted, almost shy as he gnawed on his bottom lip, “I’ve had lovers, here and there, but nothing like this. Nothing to where…”

“No one has seen your face,” you concluded as he nodded. Running a hand through his curls, you scratched lightly at his scalp as he choked back a moan at the tender touch, “thank you.”

“For what?”

“Letting me love you,” pressing a kiss to the tip of his nose, you couldn’t help but pull him close, “for letting me see you as you are.”

“You have always seen me,” he acknowledged, “just as I am.”

“As you have me,” you grinned at him, “I haven’t either...I’ve never loved anyone before.”

“Never?” he seemed surprised as you nodded at his surprised expression, “I thought...you’re...everything.”

“Not to most people,” you reminded him, “I never had the opportunity or the luxury to allow myself to relax or be...human. No one, not since I was just a small child, has ever loved me or cared so much about me before. Now I have a family, a real family. I must have done something right in some life to find you, Din.”

Unable to find the right words, Din’s hand found your face this time as he pulled you into him and just held you, watching you like you were the reason for every single glittering star in the sky, “Jeele told me that souls that are bound together will always find each other, no matter the time or distance or how hard it is. I’m glad ours found each other.”

“Din…”

“I love you,” he blurted out as you left a warm rush wash all over you. There was something about how he said - so sweet and gentle that left you breathless and in a dreamlike state. Part of you was convinced that none of this was real, surely you couldn’t be deserving of this much love or delicate intimacy. But the touch and feel of his skin on yours, the ecstasy of his kiss was enough to remind you that this was all real. He really did love you.

“I love you,” it was a promise, a tender declaration that set his soul at ease, knowing that you felt the same way about him. How, no matter how crazy or convoluted it seemed, your souls were bonded and had managed to find each other in this lifetime. Brushing your fingers over his patchy scruff, you grinned, but were quickly cut off from saying anything else by rapturous growl of your stomach, “oh.”

“I knew you were hungry,” he chuckled warmly, and Maker, you could easily get used to a lifetime of this, “come on, my little Jedi, the food’s almost ready.”

“Din-” you held onto his hand to stop him from walking away, “I have something to tell you.”

“What is it, Mesh’la?”

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum,” you tried your best not to butcher his language too much. Judging by the incredulous look on his face, he didn’t mind a bit, “I-I told you I had time to study a lot...my Mando’a is far from good, and you said it to me last night. I hope it’s not too horrible.”

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum,” he repeated back to you slowly, “you’ve got it down perfectly.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

“You’re thinking much too loudly,” you mouthed at him between bites of bread. Din’s eyebrow raised in amusement as he looked and waited for you to repeat yourself. Stuffing the bite down, you offered up a sheepish smile, “what’s on your mind, Din?”

“I was just thinking about...Tython,” he admitted, “I know we should go, we have to go, but I’m...I don’t know if I can part with him. Not yet.”

“You don’t…” you set your fork down and let out a heavy sigh. You knew, you both knew exactly what it meant. A part of you still held onto hope that it wouldn’t come to that. You didn't know a life without your small green bean anymore, and honestly, you weren’t sure if you could face a life without him, “nothing is set in stone, Din. Things could always...change. And if not...you will have fulfilled the duty you were tasked with.”

“It must be selfish of me to want to keep him,” he trained his gaze away from you, but you could see that his eyes were glistening with some tears, “he’s not just some thing. He’s….”

“Family,” you finished, “aliit.”

“Yes,” he agreed, gently resting his hand on top of yours, giving it a gentle squeeze, “just like you.”

“Whatever happens, Din,” you whispered, “this won’t be the last time you see him. I promise you that. You are his father - nothing is going to change that. He knows that, and so do you.”

“What do you think will happen when we go?” he opened and closed his mouth a few times as he blinked back tears.

“I don’t know,” you whispered, “I don’t know if there is a way to know. I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see. I do promise you one thing though.”

“What’s that?”

“I love you - and I will always love you,” you took his hand and brought it to your lips before pressing a kiss to his palm. “And so will he. I promise you that.”

“I love you both too,” he said after a few moments of peaceful silence, “we should get some rest...we’ll be on Tython soon enough anI want to make sure we’re rested and prepared for...anything.”

“Yes,” you concurred, “you’re right, of course. Come one then, my love, we’ll rest for now.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

“So...this is it?” Din sounded skeptical as he looked around the rocky ruins, with Grogu clutched tightly in his arms. You couldn’t help but snort at him in amusement; Grogu seemed to be enjoying himself anyway, “is it...does this look Jedi to you?”

He gently set Grogu down and he toddled over to the small stone pillar in the middle of the ruins. The little one cooed excitedly as he looked between the two of you; Din, studious and bewildered as he looked around, and you, doubled over as you laughed and tried to catch your breath.

“How does something look Jedi?” you finally choked out as you tried to stop your giggles, “it doesn’t have to look Jedi. It’s about the energy.”

“Okay...well, does it feel Jedi?” he was at your side, gently nudging your ribs as you laughed at him again, “you’re being cruel!”

“I’m sorry,” you were but it was still amusing nonetheless, “it’s just...the energies. Can you feel them? Can you feel the force?”

“I don’t feel anything,” he shrugged lightly, “should I be?”

“I think so...Cal was right. The energies here are very strong,” you closed your eyes for a moment as Din huffed, “it’s alright...Jeele says everyone’s in tune with the force to a certain extent, and that it can be strengthened through practice. I-I’ll teach you, my love. That way you can tell if something looks Jedi.”

“Very funny,” he sighed, his signature trademark sigh as you took his hand and pointed towards Grogu. He was surrounded by a small swarm of bright blue butterflies, giggling as he tried to chase after them, “I didn’t know it was possible to have so much love in your heart for someone else. But now I know...because of the two of you.”

“Come on,” you took his hand in yours, “let’s look around to see if we can find anything. Grogu - you stay here, we’ll be right back.”

You hesitated for a moment before deciding it was okay, and trailed alongside Din. It wasn’t a huge planet, but it was beautiful in its own way, with animals running around. No humans or other creatures seemed to inhabit the place. It was quiet here...peaceful even.

“I like this,” you said to Din as you walked through a small field of wildflowers, “it’s quiet and calm and you can just...be. I wouldn’t mind living someplace like this one day.”

“Without any intelligent life nearby and completely cut off from everything else?” he teased as you groaned at him.

"No, shiny dummy," you plopped down into the tall, soft grass. You let out a long sigh and put your hands behind your behind, closing your eyes, "somewhere nice and quiet and with just us. Peaceful. What do you think, Din? Ever thought about the future…?"

With me?

After a few beats of silence, you heard the grass next to you crunch softly before you felt his body lie next to yours. His hand reached out and sought yours; you wasted no time in shifting your arm and letting him take your hand. He laced your fingers together before resting them on his chest.

"Yes," he whispered quietly, "I've thought about it a lot."

"Oh."

"I never thought I would ever want to settle down and not...do what I do," he confessed as his thumb stroked the back of your hand, "I never thought there would be more than what I had. But then I found Grogu and...you. I came to realize that I did want more, I want more than what I had."

"A future…"

"With him and you," you were positive that you could hear him smile at his confession. This was easy and hard at the same time - neither of you had ever imagined there would be this, "I don't want this life, the constant fighting and fleeing anymore. I want...a home, a real home."

"Me too," it was a smitten, gentle declaration, "I still want to help people somehow too."

"We will," he promised, "we'll have it all, Mesh'la."

Unable to stop yourself, you rolled onto your side and on top of him. A small grunt of surprise escaped his lips as his arms went to your waist and your hands went to his helmet.

"May I?" it was a gentle request, but his hands joined yours and the helmet was pushed up to expose his lips, and you wasted no time in kissing him.

You were loath to break away from him, but you were soon left breathless and flushed, about to say something when a loud, booming sound met your ears. The two of you broke away and looked to the ruins where you'd left Grogu. At the giant beam of bright blue light emitting from the center of it, you gasped loudly.

Scrambling to your feet, you held your hand out to help him up, before the two of you ran over to see what the commotion was.

"Kid!"

"Grogu!"

When you reached the ruins, you found nothing around except for Grogu sitting and meditating in the center.

"What's happening?" Din asked in confusion as you realized what was happening.

"Its okay," you put a hand on his arm, "he's reaching out. To see if any other Jedi are listening. There's nothing we can do...we just...wait."

"Okay," he sighed lightly as he let you take his hand and the two of you sat down. It was better than pacing around and worrying; at least this way you could keep an eye on him.

»»————-　♡　————-««

After a while, there was suddenly silence. And after the loud noise of the beam, it was almost deafening. Grogu waddled over to the two of you, smiling as he reached for Din. Ever the doting father, he easily scooped him up and clutched him to his chest.

"Did you do it, buddy?" he asked quietly as Grogu cooed happily. Reaching over and you stroked his ears, smiling at the small green bean.

"He called out for someone," you confirmed, "we just have to wait now."

"How long?"

"As long as it takes," you leaned back against him and the three of you heaved a collective sigh, "I guess we can relax."

Din nodded in agreement as you suddenly realized just how tired you were. Despite your best efforts, your eyes started to close and before you could fight it, you were dozing off. Din, however, was wide awake and kept his keen eyes open and sweeping the horizon as you and Grogu snoozed.

Even though he thought he was doing a thorough job, the Mandalorian missed one big thing. He almost jumped when a long, thin shadow loomed over him. In his panic, his hand went to the blaster at his side and he prepared to draw it.

"There's no need for that," it was a man's voice that reached his ears as Din looked up, "if I wanted to hurt you, you’d already be dead.”

"Who are you? Are you...the Jedi?"

"I’m Ezra. Ezra Bridger."

»»————-　♡　————-««

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#din djarin x reader #din djarin #the mandalorian #the Mandalorian x reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #star wars #step into the daylight series

145 notes · View notes

smiting-finger · 4 years ago

Text

alive, and back on my usual nonsense

So after getting preoccupied with other things and temporarily falling off the face of the planet (for like an entire year ಥωಥ), I was thinking about the kdrama Mr. Queen (which I've been meaning to watch), and the Chinese novel it was based on (太子妃升职记, which I read a few years ago and very much enjoyed), and this popped out--

Wei Wuxian’s first thought is that there seem to be an awful lot of female voices around, for a bedroom inhabited by two men. Did he drink too much last night? It wouldn’t be the first time he’s overindulged on a trip to the town and woken up in a strange place the next morning, but that kind of problem has been cropping up a lot less frequently now that he has Lan Zhan around to ferry him home.

(Sometimes literally, on his back. His broad, strong--)

But perhaps Lan Zhan had gotten drunk, too? In which case, Wei Wuxian should consider them lucky to have woken up surrounded by people, rather than chickens, rabbits or, notably, on one occasion, mounds of resentful cabbages.

The chatter around him continues, pitched high with youth and - is that anxiety? It's interspersed with the odd interjection from what sounds like one (calmer, if more exasperated) older woman and a man. Probably not a nunnery, he decides. Perhaps the back rooms of a pleasure house? Although, if that’s the case, this amount of excitement over a mere two men is honestly a little excessive.

He reaches out tentatively, but pats all the way across the mattress to the edge without finding his usual bedfellow. A much less tentative venture towards the other side produces similar results.

Hm.

Wei Wuxian cracks open an eye and heaves himself upright, absent-mindedly scratching at his (unusually soft - as much as he hates to admit it, maybe Nie Huaisang has a point about drinking less and training more) side and squinting into the too-bright light until the person-shaped blur in front of him sharpens into focus.

“Niang niang!” a complete stranger cries tearfully, clutching at the sleeve of his other arm. “You’re awake! Thank Heavens, you’re awake! Physician Liu, quick, quick!”

A cushion is produced from somewhere and thrust expectantly between Wei Wuxian and the elderly man sitting at his bedside.

He sighs. It’s probably not worth fighting.

Wei Wuxian smacks his upturned wrist onto the unusually lavish brocade and is only a little surprised when it’s covered by a cloth before the physician reaches to take it.

(Do they think he’s diseased?)

((Is he diseased?!))

(((Is that why Lan Zhan isn’t here?)))

He looks at the row of young girls (+ 1 matron) kneeling along the wall to his left, dressed identically to the first and also now beginning to prostrate themselves and wail about “Niang niang!” and blessings and deserving to die.

Not a pleasure house, then.

He looks around at the rest of the richly-furnished room and its intricately-carved wooden furniture, the wealth of jade carvings and the obscene amount of gold that's gilding … everything (so shiny). The opulence of it all would put even Jin Guangshan to shame.

So, not a nunnery either.

He looks down at the small hands, delicate wrists and - he clutches one abruptly just to make sure his eyes aren’t deceiving him - breasts of the body that he certainly was not inhabiting yesterday.

“Well,” he says aloud, unable to stop himself from wincing at the high, soft voice that emerges despite fully expecting it. “It’s not the first time this has happened.”

===

Two days, one diagnosis of shock-induced memory loss and some discreet enquiries (as well as some indiscreet enquiries) later, this is what he knows about his situation:

He’s the main consort (unfavoured) of the crown prince of whatever place he’s landed in;

Three days ago, following a disagreement with one Consort Yun (favoured, main competitor for husband’s affections);

In the course of this disagreement, both women somehow fell into a palace lake and mostly-drowned;

Consort Yun (admittedly quite pretty) was revived at the scene, but Wei Wuxian took a full day to “miraculously” recover;

Angered by the unseemly behaviour of her daughters-in-law, particularly upon learning that the Crown Princess’s first act upon waking was to stumble upon a chance meeting between the Crown Prince and Consort Yun in one of the pleasure gardens and bodily throw herself between them (a tactical error on Wei Wuxian’s part. He’d been trying to throw himself over the battlements to freedom, but he’d gotten lost and scaled the wrong wall), the Empress (Crown Prince’s political opponent, not particularly fond of either consort) grounded both of them to their respective residences for a month, with no visitors allowed.

Which brings him to his current position, feeding the fish in his personal pond as an excuse to be alone. Not truly alone - he shoots a pointed glance at the maids watching anxiously from the other side of the courtyard - because he’s apparently a “suicide risk” now (and honestly, yes, he’d meant to throw himself off that roof, but he hadn’t meant to die - it’s simply that this new body’s cultivation level is not what he’s come to expect even from Mo Xuanyu’s modest abilities), but alone enough to start planning his next move.

Direct escape is out - he didn’t have a plan for what to do once he’d gotten out anyway, and honestly he’s better-resourced for finding out how he got here in the Palace than anywhere else, so it’s no great loss.

“What do you think, Master Fish?” Wei Wuxian asks a gold and black spotted koi with particularly sage-looking whiskers. “Shall I just stay here for the time being?”

It’s not a terrible place to be for the time being, he must admit, throwing more food into the water and watching the fish swarm. Being grounded, he’s at no risk from the Crown Prince’s amorous attentions for a month (a salute of gratitude to the Empress for the inadvertent protection). And thanks to Consort Yun and her voluptuous figure (and if the Crown Prince is more partial to that than the Zhao Feiyan style of willowy fragility that Wei Wuxian seems to have inherited, who can honestly blame him?), he’s at no great risk from them after that, either (a salute of gratitude to the unknowing sister-in-arms, taking one - and hopefully a great many more after that - for the team).

According to his maid (sleeve-clutcher extraordinaire, who even now is boring two holes into his skull with her woeful gaze from across the way while he does nothing more suspicious than scatter another handful of feed towards some latercomer fish), the body he’s inhabiting comes from a powerful military lineage. In particular, her father is (was?) a powerful general who currently commands more than half the nation’s military forces and has the absolute trust of the Emperor. So that more or less keeps him safe from the machinations of the majority of the nest of vipers in this palatial cesspit.

That just leaves the Empress, who - if his servants and the smuggled letters from the Original Goods’s mother (a salute of gratitude to the worthy woman for spelling it out so that even such an interloper as he can understand) are anything to go by - would definitely kill him to damage the Crown Prince’s political standing or throw any sort of roadblock in the way of him from becoming Emperor.

Less immediately - if his secret informants are anything to go by (a salute of gratitude to the resourceful host for cultivating such a valuable resource if not her dantian) - it also leaves the Crown Prince, who, upon cementing his power as Emperor, would also definitely kill his current Crown Princess in order to wedge his beloved Consort Yun into the Empress role.

Really, the only road to any sort of security for someone in his position is to raise the next Imperial heir, outlive the Original Goods’s faithless husband and become the Empress Dowager.

Hopefully Wei Wuxian will be long gone by then, but if leaving means the Original Goods will return (from … Mo Xuanyu’s body? The Ether? Or???) - well, he doesn’t want to repay her hospitality by leaving her house in a mess, so to speak. So he’ll try to set her on that career path, if he can.

But that’s an aspirational goal. First, he has to not-die before he can find out how to get himself home.

And find out how to get himself home.

If getting himself home is even possible.

Wei Wuxian dumps the rest of the fish food in the water and yells.

(It startles the maids, the fish and the poor eunuch the Crown Prince has sent as a spy into falling out of the tree he’s been hiding in and into the prickly bushes below.)

===

The problem with “staying for the time being” is … well, how interminably boring it is. The approved list of hobbies for an Imperial consort seems to consist of: eating (but not too much), sleeping (but not too much), embroidery (which he can’t do), reading (but only texts on female virtue and the occasional terrible novel), playing music (but not the flute), conversing with his maids (who are very sweet, but are all like, 12) and walking in the gardens (which he’s not allowed to do).

Honestly, it’s no wonder all the consorts turn to scheming and murder.

It only takes a week of confinement for him to snap and sneak himself out for a nighttime adventure, setting off to explore the grounds and see … a night-blooming flower, a ghost, a rat, he’ll take pretty much anything at this point.

In the end, he finds none of these things, but the walking is still pretty nice, and he even hears the faint sounds of a guqin wafting over from one of the other consorts’ residences. (He should probably learn who lives where at some point, but it’s not exactly a priority. What’s he going to do with the information when he can only visit during the nighttime? Peep?) When Wei Wuxian wanders closer, the notes resolve themselves into the familiar strains of Flowing Waters, and his breath catches on a sudden surge of longing to hear the same song, played by a different set of fingers.

(First played on a familiar guqin and then, later, accompanied by soft humming between soft, worn sheets, played across the edges of Wei Wuxian’s ribs, along the dip of his spine, and finally lower, into--)

((Is Lan Zhan thinking about him?))

(((Is Lan Zhan looking for him?)))

Stumbling blindly on, he’s so caught up in missing Lan Zhan that he misses the first few stanzas of the next piece, and it isn’t until the music starts to rise in a familiar refrain that he freezes.

He knows that song.

He’s one of the only two people who know that song, which is in fact how he got caught out the last time he found himself in a farce of an identity charade, by the only other person who knows that song, who must be - who must be -

Lan Zhan, his blood sings in his ears as he takes off in a dead run towards the source of the playing. Up ahead of him, small courtyard glows softly with the light of the only burning lamp in their vicinity. Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan-

He scrambles up the wall with the ease of a lifetime’s practice, using bloody-minded determination to make up for the lack of muscle memory.

“Lan Zhan,” he yelps, forgetting to whisper in his excitement as he flings himself over the top and into the branches of a convenient, wall-side tree. “Lan Zhan, it’s me, I-”

This is, naturally, when his foot slips. He manages to catch hold of a branch, but his tender hands and puny wrists, unused to holding up anything heavier than a chicken leg, fail to maintain their hold through his weight, and he tumbles down the trunk into a sad puddle of fabric on the ground.

“Lan Zhan,” he gasps, fighting to untangle himself from the ridiculous train that, admittedly, made a considerable contribution to cushioning his fall. He clambers up onto his hands and knees--

--and looks straight into the wide-eyed stare of Consort Yun.

===

“I cannot believe,” Wei Wuxian growls, palming the ample softness of one exposed breast with one hand, while shoving the other deeper into the many (too many) layers of fabric between them and between Lan Zhan’s splayed legs, “that after everything that’s happened, you’re still taller than me.”

Lan Zhan huffs a laugh that turns quickly into a moan, and Wei Wuxian swallows it, smothers Lan Zhan’s gasping breaths with his own parted lips and sucks them greedily down even as he coaxes out more with twisting fingers here, another tug to Lan Zhan’s poor, abused nipple there.

He slides his fingers back between slick folds and then upwards again, pushing in and out in a few languid strokes before curling them to make Lan Zhan arch harder against the wall behind him, tilt his head back and expose a beautifully vulnerable stretch of neck to Wei Wuxian's teeth.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan murmurs, and his voice is different, the shape of his lips is different, but the way Wei Wuxian’s name fits inside his mouth (tender, beloved), the way he tucks the flyaway strands of hair behind Wei Wuxian’s ear, the look in his eyes when their gazes meet (warm, open, knowing) are the same, same, same.

===

I am entirely too lazy to write the rest of it, but afterwards they regroup and it turns out LWJ has been in this world for exactly one more day than WWX, having woken up in Consort Yun’s body when she was “revived”. Consort Yun is the daughter of a high-ranking Minister in the Treasury or something, so Lan Zhan been using his new position as the daughter of a ~scholarly family~ to build a reputation for being really into Buddhist scripture, and eventually he’s going to request to be allowed to go to a nearby Temple to attain some virtuous brownie points for the Imperial family via prayer as his penitence.

That there’s also an elderly monk living there who’s got a reputation for being super good with the divine mysteries and spiritual lore about curses and whatnot is totally immaterial, if Lan Zhan happens to run into that guy, it’ll be a total coincidence, yeah.

So WWX also starts on the divine penitence route, and if everyone thinks it’s because the Crown Princess refuses to be outdone by Consort Yun, then even better, and two weeks into confinement they wear the Empress down into letting them make the trip, and when they get there, turns out the monk is Nie Huaisang.

(NHS: “OH THANK GOD, I’ve done the research but the lynchpin of this mess is definitely somewhere in the Palace and I could not for the life of me figure out a way to get in.”

WWX: “That's nice, but seriously, how come you got to stay a man?”

NHS: “My friend, I may be a man, but my balls are currently swinging somewhere around my ankles.”

WWX: “...show me.”

And LWJ is like “NO.” except WWX can tell by the look in his eye that he sort of wants to see, too).

So they return to the Palace and WWX whirls into one of their morning audiences with the Empress, distraught about a ~dream from the ancestors~ where they warned him about disrupted ley lines or accumulated resentment or an offended minor god that needs investigation by someone, and “How convenient, because we met just the guy!” And the Empress looks like she was Done Five Years Ago, but the Empress Dowager, who’s old and doddery, is like “oh no, you must bring him!” and the Empress mutters “to fucking what, offend some major gods and really do the job properly?” and that’s how they find out the Empress is Jiang Cheng.

In the meantime, the confinement edict expires and WWX+LWJ are allowed to return to their regular programming, which means that as the legal wife, WWX can continuously summon LWJ to his residence for increasingly tenuous and spurious reasons. The best thing is, it’s not even out of character for the Crown Princess, who used to regularly summon Consort Yun to subject her to not-so-veiled barbs and petty torments. So WWX summons LWJ, and then immediately expels both their entourages from the room, instructing that no one is to enter on pain of death.

So LWJ’s maids are gnashing their teeth helplessly while all sorts of piteous moans, pained gasps and the occasional scream emanate from behind the closed door, and when their mistress finally emerges there are no marks on her body, but she’s weak-kneed and having trouble walking straight, so who knows what kind of terrible tortures the Crown Princess has visited upon her.

The Crown Prince obviously hears about this, so he bursts in one day without warning, only to find the two sitting together, the Crown princess’s arms around Consort Yun’s waist, her cheek pillowed on one heaving bosom, and although she’s smiling besottedly at him now, he could have sworn that he felt killing intent being directed at him only a second ago? And to tell the truth, he’s not really in love Consort Yun either, it’s all an act to keep the two consorts (and their families) pitted in a power struggle against each other until he can finally outmanoeuvre the Empress and cement his position as heir to the throne (and also to protect his actual favourite, a third consort who’s a nondescript nobody with no political backing). So the fact that “It was all a misunderstanding, we’re friends now,” his Crown Princess says sweetly (and did she … rub her cheek against his Consort’s chest? Must be his imagination) is not the worst thing (at least neither of them/their families can be enlisted by the Empress in support of her son, and if they’re caught up with Being Besties, then at least they’re not bullying his actual favourite), but for some reason he still feels kind of … threatened? Like someone’s making moves on his wife, which is absurd because they’re both his wives, but the vibes he gets from the first one in particular are kind of … off?

In any case, the crew solve the mystery, find the lynchpin object (which turns out to be a jade dildo belonging to one of the Emperor’s favoured consorts because of course it is), and wake up in their real bodies, in their real world, to a very apologetic hermit-inventor-cultivator whose property they stumbled onto while pursuing a resentful beast. Turns out they triggered the glamour/enchantment/psychic maze world he created as a security system because, “I just didn’t want to risk people getting into my stuff, you know? I’ve got some things that could be very dangerous in the wrong hands”. WWX is like “oh yeah, for sure” and JC is like “WHAT DO YOU MEAN FOR SURE? HOW IS THIS AN UNDERSTANDABLE RESPONSE, IF YOU’RE AFRAID PEOPLE WILL TOUCH YOUR SHIT THEN JUST ENCHANT SOME FUCKING WARRIOR GOLEMS LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.”

#CQL #The Untamed #mo dao zu shi #Wangxian #fic #not-fic

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morimakesfanart · 4 years ago

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Sindria's Prophet #16

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15]

[AO3]

~POV Sinbad~ Mori wasn't just a Prophet, she had immense knowledge of her own that was going to make Sindria untouchable. Sinbad was going to achieve his dream much sooner than he had ever imagined. Mori was special; intelligent, clever, capable, and she could read the waves of Fate. Was there any other woman as attractive? The unknown craving that had plagued him for the past week was placated. Delicious wine, beautiful women, delicious food -none of his normal pleasures had fulfilled whatever that feeling was, but for some reason this moment with the his Beautiful Prophet was. "And now you're *my* kind and generous King Sinbad, ... Right?" Mori's bashful confidence was always endearing, but hearing her call him 'my King' in person made something snap in him. They were in a corner and Mori is small; he could easily block view of her in case any of the magicians turned around. He wouldn't even have to lean that far to get a taste of her. "DO EITHER OF YOU Have an ounce of self awareness??” Ja'far popped the bubble that had formed around the two.

King Sinbad froze. Everyone in the room was watching them. Sinbad stood up straight. He shouldn't exactly continue his plans with an audience. He removed his hand from the window and crossed his arms. Yam was practically shaking the magician next to her. "I wasn't the only one to see it this time!” An older magician with a beard laughed and said something like 'to be young.' Another said something a long the lines of "So it's like that then." Ja'far was still grumbling about his King's behavior -he should know better by now, he promised he wouldn't, etc. but 1. Sinbad didn't do anything wrong, and 2. he said he knew what he was doing -he knew how to handle flirting with Mori; he never said anything about not flirting with her. "And you, Lady Prophet," Ja'far changed targets. 'Oh?' Sinbad didn't expect Mori to be reprimanded for his flirting -although, she did flirt back. Ja'far continued, "You said that you knew about Sin's habits so wouldn't fall for him or-" "AAAAAH" Yamuraiha yelled over the other General as she crossed the room as fast as she could, and clapped a hand over his mouth. She turned to the King and Prophet with wide eyes and a forced smile. "Your Majesty! Mori! Would you like to see the spell again with our new changes?!" She didn't let go of Ja'far. The group of magicians started supporting her suggestion with "Let us show you," "I'm sure we've got it this time," and reciting the changes to the formula. They were clearly trying to stop Ja'far from discouraging Mori. Sinbad had no idea why they suddenly decided to become his wingmen, but it was convenient for him since he planed to do more than flirt with her later. Mori walked up to the Generals, although she only addressed Yamuriaha. "Yes, please! Even if it's not perfect I'd like to see your progress!" She spoke with the same forced enthusiasm as Yam. Sinbad only got a glimpse before Mori's back was to him, but her face was definitely a brighter red than it had been a moment ago. She was getting better at flirting with him, but she couldn't hold her composure for long. The King laughed as the head magician practically body checked Ja'far out of her way and left him out of the group before they preformed the newly revised spell. This time it produced a mostly clear stone. It wasn't a high quality diamond, but they had done it. They would have to be careful with this though since it could lower the market value of whatever they make. As they figured out the specifics for every substance they needed, Sindria could become fully self sufficient -they would still deal in trade so as to not completely leave the rest of the world behind. It was amazing. His magicians were amazing for being able to figure this out in such a short time, and his Prophet was just as -if not even more- amazing for knowing all of this and being able to explain it to them. When the excitement around the magic spell died down they finally showed him the microscope. It was a prototype so they had to be gentle with it. Two pieces of glass with water squished between them were slid under and when Sinbad looked through the lenses he saw the strange small creatures that Mori had written about. Seeing them forced him to accept that what Mori wrote about 'germs' had to be true too -and those were even smaller than these things. Looking at those things squirming around and knowing they were everywhere made his skin crawl. The King stopped looking through the device. "They really are real." "Yup." Mori responded plainly. "And now that you all know and have proof. There's going to have to be a lot of changes. The way illnesses are handled is obvious, but there's going to have to be a lot more changes to how food and housing and things are handle to better maintain sanitary environments. I know a bunch of sanitation procedures so I can help there too." Ja'far was rubbing his temples. "This is going to be a logistical nightmare. Do you realize that we are going to have to fix all those things and get all Sindrians to understand without having it affect our production or

trade??" "It's not like we're doing this alone." Mori tried to comfort him. "We'll figure something out." The conversation moved to this new problem. His Beautiful Prophet really was something else. She had solutions to problems they didn't even know they had. Mori had a habit of using her hands whenever she talked -even more when she was excited. She was cute and deserved to know, but she was in the middle of helping his people so he would hold his tongue and just watch her. If Sinbad was honest, he had stopped listening to the conversation a while ago and was just looking for an opportunity to finally ask Mori -and Yam of course- if they would join him for dinner so he could get all of his Generals more aquatinted with her. Someone mentioned a specific scroll in one of the libraries. Before the whole group could drag Mori out of the room, King Sinbad raised a hand and got everyone's attention. "I know there's a lot to do, but I have some things to discuss with my Beautiful Prophet as well." Mori looked back at him. "What is it?” It seemed that nickname wasn't as affective as before -hopefully it was just the timing. "Is it something we can talk about here?” "I was thinking we could talk over dinner," Sinbad paused to see how she would respond to the implications. Mori's eyes widened and her shoulders tensed, and best of all that blush came back. "With all of my Generals, of course." Mori blushed harder realizing he was messing with her. Yam looked disappointed at first -his Generals cared way to much about him finding a wife- but then she looked content with being a part of the plan. "You might have met them, and know them from reading Fate but they still don't know you yet." He finished. Yam spoke first. "This is a great idea. Pisti was just telling me that she wanted to get to know Mori." Mori regained her composer. "I'd like to get to know everyone personally too, so I'm find with this." It was a roundabout way of saying 'yes.' Her blush was gone but she was still embarrassed. With that settled, Ja'far let Yam and Mori know when dinner would be ready. It was a little earlier than he normally ate but this would give them more time to mingle before they'd be completely out of sunlight. "Well then," the King turned to his Prophet, "since we have some time beforehand-" "OH no you don't!" Ja'far cut in. "You've already had a long enough break *and* you plan on ending early today? The least you can do is work your butt off until then." --- ~POV Mori~ The King was pushed out of the room by his right hand man. I had a mix of relief and longing watching him go. "You'll see his Majesty again soon." Yam had a sweet smile on her face, but I knew better than to trust it. All eyes were on me and they were no longer the eyes of academics; they were hungry for gossip. I was not ready to explain why shipping us was a bad idea. "So about that scroll you mentioned earlier..." I completely shifted conversation back to the eventual rebuilding effort and luckily one of them obliged me.

I was lead to one of the libraries and handed a few scrolls on the construction used in the country. I had read a little on ancient construction methods out of interest and some on modern methods since my uncle worked in the industry. I had a little bit of experience with construction when I worked at a community theater, but it wouldn't be anything the people here wouldn't know. That paired with these documents showing how magic was used in the process made what little I did know completely useless. 'Can't know everything I guess.' I turned my head up towards the ceiling. I wasn't sure how much time I had left and I decided to use it soaking up the ambience of the library. The smell of paper, the maze-esc layouts, the quiet feeling; it's like a gentle space separate from the rest of the world. The libraries of the Black Libra Tower also had huge windows to let in a ton of natural lighting. I was really going to enjoy working in this place. --- Yam and I ended up lost in conversation, so someone ended up being sent to bring us to the dinner. When we finally arrived and opened the doors to the dining hall my nose was filled with the smell of herbs and delicious food. This was my first meal that wasn't paired with bitter medicine. I might have been procrastinating subconsciously to avoid the medicine I was no longer taking. Everyone was already there chatting. The long table was covered with food, but I couldn't make out any of it from the door. King Sinbad was sitting at the head of the table at the other end of the room with a goblet in his hand. Yamuraiha started in ahead of me and called into the room. "I'm sorry we're so late! We were talking about magical proofs and," she rambled in her explanation. I heard a few comments of congrats for getting better and said "Thanks" reflexively more than consciously. As I got closer, I ignored the Generals at the table to look at the spread. There were a few different types of fish, meat of some kind, a bunch of vegetables, and bread. It brought tears to my eyes; It was so beautiful. The Imuchukk laughed at my obvious interest in the food. "What are you waiting for? There plenty for everyone." He was sitting closest to the door. I didn't look away from the food when I answered. "I'm small with a small stomach so I'm going to need to pace myself to be able to eat a little of everything. If I save the best for last like I normally do then I might not even get to eat it." That garnered laughs and comments. I ignored them; I was too busy weighing my options. As the guest of honor I was placed at the opposite end of the table from King Sinbad. Thank goodness, because I didn't think I could handle being super close to him all evening. Even with the direct line of sight, I had distance to protect me. Yam sat on the other side of Hina from me. Pisti was on my other side. Sharrkan was across from Yam. Spartos was between Yam and Ja'far. Drakon was across from Ja'far. And Masrur was between Drakon and Sharrkan.

I picked up my plate to get food. "Alright. I've decided to just grab my favorites. If I have room later then so be it!" I was used to being watched while I eat so their stares didn't bother me. I covered my plate in all of the types of fish and some vegetables. "I take it you like fish?" Sinbad asked while I was taking some of the fish that was on his end of the table. "It's my favorite!" I answered excitedly. I could tell as I placed the grilled fish on my plate that it was going to be heavenly. It was already flaking and letting the smell reach me faster. I couldn't wait to get back to my seat and took a bite of the fish. It melted in my mouth. I let out a squeak of approval as I grabbed another bite. After a moment Sinbad asked me another question. "What do you think of greasy foods?" It felt pointed. "I'll eat it if it's the only option, but I'm not a fan." The Generals made some comments that amounted to, "They have the same taste." I was too busy enjoying my food to think about what they were saying. Pisti asked me her own pointed question as I sat down. "Do you like alcohol?" They were comparing me to Sinbad. I suddenly remembered the Official Character Encyclopedia. According to it, Sinbad's favorite food was fish, his least favorite was greasy, and his favorite snacks were the types that paired well with alcohol. "I'm not a big drinker, but it's not like I dislike alcohol. I'm just allergic to sulfites." "Huh?" The group asked in unison. Time to explain one of my allergies again. "Sulfites are a very useful preservative so it was also added to a lot of foods back home including alcohol. All grape wines produce sulfites naturally. When I ingest about 2 shots of a drink that contains sulfites I will struggle to breathe for about an hour." As soon as the words were out of my mouth, the goblet of wine I didn't realize was in front of me was grabbed by Hinahoho. They all looked panicked at each other like they had just dodged a bullet. In an attempt to relieve the tension, Sinbad asked Yam to catch everyone up on the meeting from earlier. Yam started ranting about the progress we had made with the alchemy magic. While they focused on reclaiming the mood, I focused on the delicious food. I tried a root vegetable on my plate. It was a little earthy with a subtle sweetness. The seasoning added to the sweet, but also had a little spice similar to cracked pepper. It had been streamed so it wasn't crunchy. I was asked to repeated what I told Sin and Ja'far earlier about the tech of home, Their questions had me explain more about my world and many of the things I had done: volunteer work to get scholarships, marketing for some networking organizations and some other companies, an assistant and teacher in out of school programs for 6 years while also working at a theater to pay for my own education. I only mentioned some of the places I had traveled to. I didn't even get to the things I did as hobbies or in working toward my dream of being a full time writer&artist. "I'm surprised by how much you say you've done." Drakon commented. I had heard similar before when talking about my past. "Is it really that shocking? Considering my age, I think it makes sense for me to have done a bit." It's more shocking that I was doing all that while getting so sick from my chronic illnesses that I would be fully bedridden and need a machine to breathe at least once a year until I turned 15. But I had also ate up inspiration porn as a child as a motivation to not let my body hold me back if I could. "Aren't we around the same age?" Yam asked me in response. I laughed. "Do I look 23 to you?" I've been mistaken for much younger than I actually was for as long as I could remember. It 1st became a problem when I turned 18 and got told I was clearly 12 with a fake ID when trying to buy an M rate game (Devil May Cry btw). "You're not?” ”Nope.” I rested my elbows on the table, interlocked my fingers, and I placed my chin on top with a smile, "But I'm curious how old you all think I am now." At 25 I was mistaken for a 14

year old. At least, a few months back someone thought I was legal (they guessed 19). Most realized I had to be older the more they talked to me, but their impressions never fully dissipated. As frustrating as it was, I found amusement in times like this by turning my age into a guessing game. Sharkkan had the face of someone fearing they had hit on someone too young. "You are at least 20, right?” They all suddenly looked worried. "I'm definitely older than 20." I answered. Pisti laughed. She was also short with a baby face; she knew my struggle. "Maybe she's older than Ja'far!” Of course she would make the closest guess. "There's no way she's older than me." Ja'far scoffed. "I am older than 25 though.” I could have teased him but I held my tongue since he already seemed annoyed with me. "How old are you then?” Hina asked. "I'm 29.” I smiled at everyone's surprise. I might only have surface levels similarities to Sinbad, but when you're a simp for a fictional character does that really matter? "I was born on April 7th so I should only be 5 days younger than King Sinbad since he was born on the 2nd. However, I don't know if there's a time dilation between my world and this one. The day we met was Oct 3rd for me back home. It wasn't the same date here, was it?" Sinbad is 29, Ja'far is 25, and Masrur is 20 during the Balbadd arc; their 2nd set of ages are 30, 26, and 21 respectfully. Ja'far's birthday is Aug 30th and Masrur's is Dec 27. Those 2nd ages listed can't be for right after the 6 month time skip because no matter how you calculate it the shortest distance between those 3 birthdays is 8 months. I was really interested in how the current arbiter of this world was going to figure this out. "It was Oct 3rd here too." "Oh. Well, that's convenient," was what I said while my thoughts were cursing the arbiter. 'That lazy son of a bitch synced the worlds so they wouldn't have to deal with a time dilation. I can feel it. Hold on... I arrived on Oct 3rd; the coup was 4 days later on the 7th. 6 months later would mean Sinbad arrives back in Sindria on my birthday. Did some 'real me' somewhere plan a b-day present for myself in some self-indulgent fanfiction??' ((Yes. Yes, I did UwU & I plan on making Mori panic then too.)) King Sinbad had that smile on his face that told me he was ready to flirt. "I didn't realize we were so close in age." No colors got in my way when he talked. That was good. I was desensitized again, and wouldn't have to deal with unnecessary distractions. I couldn't tease Ja'far, but I could tease his Majesty. "I know, right? It's amazing what the difference of 5 days can do for one's complexion." Sinbad froze and his expression went blank. Something that was probably wine sprayed across the table as Sharkkan had a spit take before erupting into laughter with Hinahoho and Pisti. "Oh my" Yam murmured with a hand over her mouth. Drakon , Spartos, and Ja'far stared at me in disbelief. Sinbad still wasn't responding... Maybe teasing him about his age was a bad idea. So far, unless it was something important I flirted with Sinbad since that was the best way to get on his good side; hearing something like this from me must have hurt a bit extra. I had been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I forgot just how sensitive he was about his age. I ended up flailing my hands from nerves, and to get his attention. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that when I know how self conscious you are." He flinched. "I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but you won't look any older than you do now 5 years from now..." "I uh.. Is that so?" Sinbad asked as he started to regain himself. "It is. You'll be just as-” "If you're willing to talk about the future, does that mean you are finally ready to explain about those calamities you mentioned in Balbadd?" Ja'far cut in with a fierce look. He had been waiting for any mention of the future to bring this up. The King spoke with a gentle but stern tone. "I don't know if this is the time for that conversation. This is Mori's first meal with

everyone after all." "I'm fine. I made a promise and I intend to keep it. As long as everyone else is willing to talk seriously for a few mins, I don't see the problem." I had been avoiding this conversation for long enough. There were things I still planned to keep secret, but I couldn't avoid having this conversation forever. And besides, I could feel in the waves that Ja'far wasn't going to let this night end unless I explained some of it. ((I have the next 3 chapters written but it's going to take me a bit to draw all of illustrations & comics. Also, good luck to all the students reading this. I know classes are starting up again. Be safe out there.))

#magi prophet fanfic #sinbad x oc #magi sinbad x oc #king sinbad #sinbad magi #magi fanfic #magi sinbad #yamuraiha

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sad-baddie001 · 4 years ago

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Aizawa: Kitty’s got claws

This was a request. Feel free to request.

Quirk: Neko-Neko : A mutation type quirk which includes cat ears, claws and a tail. Readers eyes change color depending on emotions, equipped with claws and a tail along with heightened stealth and agility.

Yn P.O.V

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

My phone buzzed under my pillow causing me to stir lightly. A soft purr left my lips as I stretched. I hopped out of bed and turned off my alarm. Today is Friday, the last day of my first week at UA as a support corse teacher. Today was also special because the teachers are having a little party after school. I haven't met all of the teachers at UA high school but hopefully today will be my chance to get better aquatinted with everyone.

I strolled over to my bathroom to begin getting ready. I completed my morning routine before getting dressed. I put on my hero costume before having a quick breakfast and heading out. As I reached the school I began walking to my classroom, only to run into principle Nezu.

"Hey there principal Nezu." I smiled and waved at him as he walked the hall sipping from his tea cup.

"Well hello there ms (hero name)!" How are you?"

"Pretty nervous about tonight actually" I said with a nervous chuckle. "Oh? Why so nervous?"

"Well I haven't met all the teachers yet so the thought of meeting everyone at a party is pretty nerve racking."

"Aah, I understand. Have a good one ms. (Hero name)."

"You too." I entered the teachers lounge and began to put away my things at my desk. My good friend hound dog came into the teachers lounge and we greeted each other carrying on simple conversation. The teachers lounge intercom cut on stopping us in our little back and fourth.

"Good morning teachers, tonight social event will be held in meeting room A starting at 5 pm. See you there and have a wonderful day."

Small sighs and groans were heard going around before midnight spoke. "Alright, who told Nezu about our party?" I kept my head down and bit the inside of my lip now realizing what I had done. To be fair I didn't know it was supposed to be a secret. I heard a small growl coming from next to me as I tried desperately to not turn around. He knew it was me, we've known each other for far too long. He's the one who helped me land my job at UA. Knowing hound dog would spaz on me I decided to jump ahead of the situation. I stepped out from my desk and bowed continuously as I spoke.

"It was me everyone, I wasn't aware that the party was a secret. I apologize for my incompetence. I will make it up to all of you in any way that I can, I promise." There were some mumbles here and there, mainly about the tea Nezu brought but I turned back to my desk finished unpacking and headed to my classroom to start my day.

Time skip

Immediately after school I headed to my room on campus to start preparing goodies for the party to try and smooth things over. With only a few hours to have everything ready, in the lounge and have time to get ready I had to move quick. I made onigiri, mochi, coffee milk tea with boba, tea sandwiches and tea cookies. I even brought a couple apple sauce pouches and juice pouches. As I finished making things one by one and I transported everything to the meeting room with the help of my amazing student Mei Hatsume and her brilliant gadgets. I rushed back to my room to do some light cleaning and self touch ups before heading over to the party.

Not realizing how long I had taken, when I had arrived to the party most people were already there and enjoying the refreshments I made. There was tea also set out on the table that was barely touched. Not long after I showed up hound dog arrived. "Hey, I figure out how to make it up to everyone. I made refreshments, you should have some." He grumbled and we talked for a little before he told me to at least eat a little of what I made. After all the cooking I wasn't that hungry. Not wanting to hear the loud barking for disregarding what he suggested I went to the front to get a coffee milk tea. As I was pouring other people around the table grabbed other refreshments. Suddenly a loud voice rang through the room.

"Yo! Who made all these amazing snacks?!" The voice was unmistakable, present mic. The room continued its casual conversation so he blurted out again, this time even louder. "WHO MADE THESE DOPE SNACKS?!" Hound dog's growl could be heard across the room before he barked out. "(HERO NAME) DID YOU IDIOT, SHES RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AND ERASERHEAD!"

Suddenly all eyes were on me as Nezu approached me. "Oh ms. (Hero name), thank you for making these wonderful refreshments. They compliment my tea so well. You're fitting right in at UA. Have some of the tea, you may like it." He walked off and all conversation resumed. "The tea is good but it's always the same. Eventually you get tired of it." I turned my head to see eraserhead next to me.

"Thanks for the advice, I'm (hero name)." He let out a chuckle. "Yeah I heard. Nice to meet you." He grabbed a cup of boba and a juice box before walking off. I stood around introducing myself to a few people here and there. Eventually I was in a corner drinking my boba and just watching. Getting to the bottom of my drink I went for the last juice box only to collide hands with someone else. I looked up to see eraser again. I chuckled as I placed my hand on the juice box. "Sorry, but you're not getting the last juice box."

"Tch. I think I am." His voice was gruff as he also grabbed the juice box. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Are you willing to fight for it?"

Before I knew it eraser and I had snuck off to the training arena with the juice box to find out who would be getting it. We sat down the juice box on the bleachers and moved down to the city area of the training arena.

"First one to take down the other and reach the gate gets the juice box. Agreed? And since you're pretty well known and I'm aware of your quirk I'll at least tell you the name of mine." He sneered lightly under his breath causing me to glance up at him. "The name of my quirk is neko- neko, pretty self explanatory, no? So how about we get started?" I took my stance and so did he. "Sounds pretty rational to me."

My ears twitched as he took his stance. My tail curled as my eyes changed from black to green. "Then let's begin." I immediately jumped as high as I could into the air dropping down into an ally. Hearing the sound of his infamous scarf following behind me I took off sprinting. I have to stay out of his line of vision. Hiding under one of the nearby buildings I watched him carefully. His demeanor calm almost as if this wasn't a challenge. He walked slowly through the ally his hair suddenly went up. He's using his quirk. His scarf went flying through the air followed by him. He landed on top of a light post with his scarf wrapped loosely around him.

"I'm going to get that last juice box." He said as his hair stayed on end. But why? Why is continually using his quirk? It has to be draining, but why is he doing it?

"Oh come on? You think so?" I stalked around the arena as I spoke. "Come on man, there's apple sauces left too. Did you even try them?"

"I did, and they were quite enjoyable but I can't live without my juice boxes." I creeped closer and closer toward him as I spoke. "Well I hate to break it to you, but you may have to because I don't play fair." I jumped up behind him and wrapped my tail around his eyes as my claws grabbed onto him. I stood up and leaned back causing us both to fall toward the ground. Immediately using his scarf he wrapped it around the top of a high buildings. I sprinted up his scarf connected to the building. "I figured you out." I yanked on his scarf as hard as I could to send him flying as I pounced over toward the juice box. "Your quirk doesn't work on genetic mutations." Grabbing the juice box with my tail I poked the straw through and took a sip.

I turned back around to eraser gathering his scarf with his quirk. A long tear was visable on his scarf. I immediately jumped down made my way to eraser. "I am very sorry, my deepest apologies. I didn't mean to damage your scarf, I should have filed down my claws. Please accept the juice box and my sincerest apologies." I frantically apologized as I held out the juice box to him with my tail. A chuckle left his lips as he gently touched my tail and pushed the juice box back towards me. "It's fine, I'm actually quite impressed. Keep the juice box, you won it fair and square." He turned to walk out, speaking before he walked away. "Your coffee boba is one of the best I’ve had by the way. We're sparring for that next."

He disappeared as I took a sip of the juice box barely able to contain my excitement and hold back my smile. I just got to spar with THE eraser head.

Two days later

It was now monday and I was headed to the school. Reaching the teachers lounge right before the bell rang I saw eraser on his was out. I stopped him and spoke. "I know you don't like being late to class but I just wanted to give you this really quickly. Again, I am very sorry." I handed him the box in my hands as he slowly opened it. His slow sleepy motions along with his tired eyes went from looking drained to drained and cheerful— almost.

"You have to lift the scarf, theirs something else under it. He sat the box down and pulled out the new scarf I made for him over the weekend with my knowledge of support gear. He sat the scarf to the side and immediately picked up one of the 12 juice boxes I had given him. "Here let me help." I grabbed the old torn scarf from around his neck with my tail and set it to the side. Finally seeing his full face for more than a moment, I didn't let my eyes linger too long. Picking up the scarf with my freshly filed claws I wrapped it around his head and stepped back.

"I hope you like it, I made a few modifications but I'll let you figure those out on your own. Let me know if there's any problems or anything I can do eraser head." I walked toward my desk and placed my things down. "Sparring session after school to see who pay for drinks tonight. Training arena 5pm sharp. Don't be late." He began walking out with the box in hand as my face flushed. He stopped on his way out and turned to me. "Thank you (yn)." He stepped out and I had an internal excitement almost too much to contain. And to think, all this was for a juice box.

#mha x reader #mha imagines #aizawa x reader #aizawa x y/n #shoto aizawa #aizawa sensei #my hero academia aizawa #mr aizawa #my hero fanfic #my hero academia #my hero academy fanfiction #my hero x y/n #my hero x reader

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idratherdreamofjune · 4 years ago

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@sunheart wrote in her tags on another post:

Genuinely hate being alive ... I completely understand on so many levels why you would hate being a woman. Its horrible. And then as a Christian there's this whole really ugly dynamic- that i know is probably a lie i just haven't worked out how yet- that we're the 2nd best. The afterthought. The mediocre option. Almost everything in life men are better at and it's hard to believe it's just cultural- math logic leadership writing cooking writing physical activities on and on, and women are good at being Nice :) Which ok i like being nice but it's like that's my only option I feel like any other impact i might wish to have upon the world will be paltry in comparison to what i could do if only i was a man. I feel incompetent. Irrational. Emotional. Obnoxious. I feel like I'm supposed to be a plaything for the beings that were *actually* created to be in harmony with God like I'm not supposed to have a connection with God- only through my husband which what does that make me as a single childless bitch? I can't even fulfill the main point of my existence. Jesus interacted with women but did he care about them like he did the men? David and John were named his favorites not Deborah or Hannah. And like i said i'm sure none of that's true but i don't know how and it feels awful. hate it.

Hopefully others have shared encouragement on this already, but just in case I wanted to give some thoughts. Please know that if I sound riled at all (and I’m going to try to avoid that) I’m not upset at anyone who feels this way but am deeply upset by the enemy’s lies that so many are hurt by. As a younger believer I did struggle with some of these questions myself, and for a long time it was difficult to reconcile these concerns with the promises that God loves me.

Your instincts are right - it is a lie that women are second best. And before I go any further let me also agree that yes, we are physically weaker than men and have other weaknesses too. But since when has weakness meant that someone is any way “less than” others? Men have weaknesses too, just different ones. That’s the nature of humanity: every person is a mixed bag of strengths and weaknesses. I’ve never heard before that men are better at cooking?? My dad literally struggles to cook a hotdog in the microwave and has never touched a grill in his life. And okay men may (possibly, not sure on this one either) be inherently better at math, but which gender is drastically underrepresented in the nursing field? I suspect there are fewer male teachers, too, though not as huge a disparity. Men are more prone to recklessness and violence - part of the reason married men live longer (gotta get that stable influence). Again yes men are physically stronger but have you watched ballet dancers (oooh i mean ballerinas, sorry there’re so few ballerinos that I forgot to differentiate) or female gymnasts? Nothing “less than” there! The famous Proverbs 31 woman is a good insight into Biblical support of female abilities and value: “strength and dignity are her clothing”, “she opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” “Let her works praise her in the gates.” (The gates were essentially the city hall or forum of ancient Israel.)

Going back to the beginning - women were created second, true. But did God not know His own plan? He was always going to create women. And the really amazing thing that I learned in the last couple of years is that, when God says He’s going to make Adam “a helper” (Hebrew ”ezer”), that’s the same word that is used to describe God’s actions for His people throughout the Old Testament: - Exodus 18:4 “The God of my father was my help.” - 1 Samuel 7:12 “Ebenezer” means “rock of help” and is a memorial of Yaweh’s help. - Psalm 30:10 “Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me! O Lord, be my helper!” - Psalm 115:11 “You who fear the Lord, trust in the Lord, He is their help and their shield” - Psalm 121:2 “My help comes from the Lord” - Hosea 13:9 “‘You are against Me, against your helper.’“

It is a common word for “help” used in other settings, yes, but the fact that it’s used of God illustrates that this is no poor or second-rate role. Helping - aiding - supporting - incredibly important! In fact this article I just found puts it this way:

In two cases it refers to the first woman, Eve, in Genesis 2. Three times it refers to powerful nations Israel called on for help when besieged. In the sixteen remaining cases the word refers to God as our help. He is the one who comes alongside us in our helplessness. That's the meaning of ezer. Because God is not subordinate to his creatures, any idea that an ezer-helper is inferior is untenable. In his book Man and Woman: One in Christ, Philip Payne puts it this way: "The noun used here [ezer] throughout the Old Testament does not suggest 'helper' as in 'servant,' but help, savior, rescuer, protector.'

Moving on to the New Testament, and the topic of John, who is known as “the disciple whom Jesus loved”. John is the one who wrote the book which tells us that (under the direction of the Holy Spirit, yes) and he only uses that wording as a title, in place of his name. Nowhere does it say he was the favorite disciple, or even most loved, just that he was loved. To me it seems more as if John is saying “Jesus loved me! Can you believe it?!” It has a feeling of awe and thankfulness as opposed to superiority.

Getting into marriage specifically, I do believe that a wife should be under the headship of her husband ...mainly in the sense of letting him have the last word on decisions and plans. This is in part due to differing areas of strength, and in part because in some situations it’s better to have a family leader - most groups of humans need a leader, and following an assigned (or picked) leader does not make one inferior. All that being said, a wife should be able to provide input, advice, and feedback to her husband, who should take into strong consideration his wife’s needs, insights, and concerns (Ephesians 5:25-29).

The lie that women cannot be connected to God outside of their husband is refuted not only by all the vibrantly faithful single or windowed Christian ladies of history (Amy Carmichael, Gladys Aylward, Mary Slessor, and Elisabeth Elliot are some of my favorites) but also Scripture itself. When Christ spoke with the divorced Samaritan woman the disciples were shocked not because she was a Samaritan but because she was a woman (John 4:27; she was shocked on both counts - John 4:9) - I hope they got used to it because Jesus spoke with women a lot. Despite the culture of the time, Jesus clearly had very warm and caring direct relationships with Martha and Mary, Mary Magdalene, and other women. Anna the Prophetess in the temple had been widowed for decades and was serving God alone “night and day” (Luke 2:37). Incredibly, in a culture where women were looked down upon, the Lord chose women to be the first to discover the empty tomb, and Mary Magdalene to be the first to see the risen Christ! I love that passage so much (John 20:11-18).

Another example is when Jesus stopped on His way to heal Jairus’ daughter (i.e. He put aside a powerful man’s urgent request) to lovingly interact with the woman who’d suffered bleeding for years - a terribly personal and female problem (Mark 5:21-35).

To try to wrap up, I’ll return to David in the OT, who was a “man after God’s own heart”. But again, it doesn’t say that he was actually a favorite - it does say David was chosen by God though, to lead Israel and establish the family from which Jesus would ultimately come. You know who else was chosen? Esther - “for such a time as this”. Once she realizes the task she must complete, she tells Mordecai how it’s going to go, and “Mordecai then went away and did everything Esther had ordered him.” Esther gets a book named after her and is remembered in the holiday of Purim to this day. Also note that Esther was married to an unbeliever. Likewise Ruth was chosen, as a young foreign widow, to be part of the Messiah’s kingly line. As an aside, my favorite thing about Ruth’s story (besides all the faith and beauty of it) is the simultaneous deep respect and protectiveness Boaz shows towards her (okay enough mush). Anyhow what it comes down to is that God chooses and loves both men and women, and both have a place (singly and married) in His plans and kingdom. See also Galatians 3:28 “ There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

This post has all over the place, and I probably forgot a bunch of things I wanted to add (if anything else comes to mind I’ll add it later), but I hope it’s been encouraging. Yes I’ve struggled with some aspects of how women are portrayed in the Bible, but what I shared above, plus the love and blessings I’ve known as a single woman are more than enough evidence that we are known and loved. If anything is unclear or anyone has any questions please speak out/send an ask! Anon asks are on too. Also if anyone wants to add or amend anything do so without hesitation!!

#marriage #women in the Bible #Book of Ruth #Book of Esther #singleness #Scripture #lies

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transsexualhamlet · 4 years ago

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predictions for yuumori s2 (as a manga reader)

No matter what happens, this is probably gonna end up aging badly, but i’m hyperfixating and I’ve decided to make it everyone else’s problem so I’m going to predict where they’re gonna go with s2 of moriarty the patriot (keep in mind i’m writing this as of episode 2) and what I think would be the ideal scenario, in the likely situation that this is the last season.

So we can tell a lot about what they’re going to cut/include from the opening and ending, and the first two episodes.

Observations/Conclusions:

-moneypenny and most likely von herder are gone, already evidenced by the first 2 episodes, which is :( but understandable bc there’s only so much space and they’re definitely cutting the arcs where they would be important

-so that means no moran backstory because duh, there’s a point in the backstory and i see value in it, moran slaps when he’s not being an ass lmao, but again, time constraints

-no matter what I can’t see them keeping in the like, child hunting thing 2 electric boogaloo, even tho it did further Fred’s and Louis’ characters, since they’ve previously cut out stuff considering them and. You know. That’s how it be.

-You can see they’re including jack the ripper arc (considering, jack is in the opening) and I have faith that they can downsize the arc without butchering it if they do it right. This is good that they’re keeping it in, considering it’s one of the... main arcs not involving milverton that advances the plot.

-Major thing we can tell is that, yeah, Milverton is nowhere to be seen. It seems like this would fuck things up bad since he’s like, the only kind of “main villain” we get here. But honestly? I agree with that. Fuck Milverton. He has no character or motivation and is like my one and only bone to pick with the manga. He’s just there to suck ass and create plot convenience?? I don’t like him and he never needed to be there if he wasn’t at least going to do something interesting. I support the anime cutting him.

-That DOES fuck over their ability to do the white knight arc, since, well, milverton is the cause of all of that. And this is the one thing I really don’t know what they’re going to do with that to connect jack the ripper directly to the final problem. I can’t predict that, but I do think there are ways it can be done that won’t be Awful.

-So considering that, Mary’s arc is definitely axed, which doesn’t bother me that much since by that point i so impatient for gay people and really didn’t care about watson’s fiance even tho she is a lovely lady. For anime effect, she does not need an arc, though I could see them having her show up a few times so watson doesn’t seem too gay either lmao.

-They’re definitely shooting to end with the final problem, considering without it there’s no big culminating event between moriarty and sherlock, which is obviously the big sell. And well. It’s. Um. The final problem.

The season says it’s slated to be 13 episodes, since s1 didn’t have enough time for 12. I honestly think they can manage it all, if they play their cards right.

Outlook:

This whole potential situation does sound familiar, I’ll point out that I just arrived here after the shit show of the promised neverland’s second season. But I don’t think it will get bad like tpn did. Because in Moriarty, they could afford to cut things because there are many stand alone and disposable arcs, whereas tpn really shouldn’t have, since they pretty much all contributed later to Major Main Character Plot Things. And the important points of the arcs that they’ll probably cut can actually be written into existing ones without looking like plot convenience, in my vision of it.

Honestly, I’m pretty optimistic for moriarty, it works better for this kind of adaption than in a lot of other manga that end up getting these most likely two season adaptions. I’d love to get those arcs for the servant’s and other character’s developments of course, but trying to stick that in when there’s really only time to focus on the main characters would suck up time better spent on really getting deep into the main storyline. Even if there are less characters, in a situation like this a streamlined and nuanced story will look elegant, whereas shoving as much content as possible into a few short episodes makes everyone cringe.

The situation does end up looking like the promised neverland, but it has a chance to be significantly less fucked considering,,, well,,, tpn is an insanely low bar, and they will hopefully not make the promised neverland’s same mistakes of Shove Seventeen Plotlines Into One Episode After Realizing Belatedly They Actually Needed Those Parts.

Obviously I don’t know what will happen, and this will be outdated by sunday lmao, but my projection looks something like this for 13 episodes to conclude the show.

Predictions:

(Episodes 1+2: A Scandal in the British Empire)

Episode 3: I’m very anxious for 3 considering this will probably make or break my opinion on the anime. Ideally, this episode would wrap up the scandal arc and go over the whole James Bond thing, it could be pretty baller and fit well into an episode. But though there’s plenty of Irene in the opening, there’s no sight of Bond, so considering anime as a whole is fucking transphobic, they might try to change it, twist around bond’s words or just, gloss over it altogether. If they cut it, they might have time to squeeze in another arc but I don’t think they honestly need to? With what they seem to be keeping in, they’ll have ample time to get to everything, and it would be shorter anyway considering the smaller amount of servants.

Here, we do definitely need to cover Sherlock’s “receiving the name of the lord of crime and deciding to burn it and find it out himself because he’s extra”, no matter the status of irene/bond’s gender. If they do that right and possibly change a few things so it’s more important, this could play into them moving forward his whole discovery of their secrets.

Episodes 4-7: These will most likely cover jack the ripper arc. There’s a lot to go over here, and I’m confident they can cut it down, because tbh Moriarty is pretty long winded for a manga and cutting things is good to an extent. This covers most of the major expansions on William’s ideas and plans, and definitely has the holes to stuff in more of the points made in the arcs that will be cut out. Though I have my reservations, they could plausibly take most points in white knight and integrate them into here.

Episodes 8-10: These are the ones that are going to take the most work and probably be the most changed. They should finish up the ripper arc in 7, give or take a few episodes, and then here, If Sherlock has a little more figured out from episode 3, he can look deeper. I think it’s honestly a good idea for the one to discover the Incriminating Records to be him, as it again gives them more connection. There needs to be some other reason Moriarty’s secrets are in danger of getting leaked to the paper, but I’m sure they can put something together with scotland yard or something, or even like, Mycroft. I see that. But if that happens, then we can spend an episode or so on the merchant of london, aka little liam commits girlboss, which can be woven into the idea of everything Coming Out.

Episodes 11-13: Final problem. I see this going mostly unchanged, up until 55. Truth is they’ll probably end up cutting something but hmm. I don’t know. They should keep the fred stuff in, since they’ll cut his other development. They should keep the squad asking sherlock for help, since they cut the other parts that highlight the crime squad’s care for him. But I think they could montage most of the William Goes French Revolution On You Hoes, even the part where the kids come in front of one of them, if you see what’s going on right. But everything can proceed as in the manga pretty smoothly, I think, it all makes sense if they put it together in 7-10. You know, you got somehow, the worst case happens, and boom, scandal, final problem enacted. Killing spree. William reveals he’s been emo this whole time but it’s too late now. Everyone scrambling to catch up with his damn plans. Gay boy knocking on 221B with a fucking love letter. Shit gets found out. And then... well, yuh.

Disclaimer I still don’t know everything about this, bc I cannot find a translation of 54, only the raw with no context, and I know there’s content after 55 but I can’t find that either. But I’m sure as hell an english major and can understand where things are probably going. I don’t know what’s involved at that point, and if there’s some plan detailed to save him or something. That’s the main thing I don’t know, and if there is one detailed of course that kind of changes everything, but for now I’m going on the assumption that 54 is “sherlock runs to the bridge and yells at liam to stop being a dramatic whore while london burns around them and the murder squad watches anxiously with mysterious intent, until it is chapter 55″. (IF Y’ALL HAVE THE ENGLISH PLEASE HMU) They better not TOUCH anything in 55 or so help me god.

But as to after 55, things are going to be different. Besties, I’m an optimist, but there’s no way they’ll make a season after this. It does appear that they’ve mostly wrapped up, and they’ve gotten through what Big Revals they plan on doing. The shit hinted from the beginning has happened, and there probably won’t be enough to create another, unless the author plans on fucking shit up again, which I don’t approve of. There are a few things still left unsaid, like, Liam’s real name and everything, but if it’s supposed to be important, things that small can 100 percent be written into this.

And as something that’s intending to finish up a story, depending on what manga canon really is (BESTIE I DO NOT KNOW WHAT IT IS) they might change it. There’s two options, a bittersweet/hopeful and a tragic one, but either one will end up open ended, because of my extensive knowledge of 2 season animes with significantly longer mangas. (done badly: tokyo ghoul and tpn, done well: owari no seraph and mob psycho) Either we have it like well, oh damn, everything was destined to be Sad but well you’re with him now you’re probably dead, but you know there’s something hinted at and you don’t know for sure so that’s the catch. So you get a vague and bittersweet but possibly hopeful ending. OR something that takes,,, whatever ends up happening in the manga or whatever the plan is and turning it into an epilogue infodump.

I can see either going well depending on how they handle the messages of the story. But yeah, as far as to my extent of the understanding of the show, that’s how it’ll probably go, and what my opinion of how it should is.

To What Extent Will The Gay:

You know, this is my ideal scenario within these time limits, but you know they could always go The Wrong Direction if the anime team took a look at some of the later chapters and went “holy shit this is a bit too gay” and try to axe some of the sherliam content, which I wouldn’t put past any corporation.

In the case that they do, I see lot of good shit going. They’re clearly trying to do the final problem, so they obviously can’t cut out 55, which is good :). But though 55 is clearly, uh, really fucking homosexual, the most romantic shit goes down in 53, as far as I can tell? (keeping in mind i still haven’t found 54′s english version, if anyone would like to direct me to a translation, that would be LOVELY.) I unfortunately can see them cutting Liam’s letter almost entirely, and that kind of scares me.

You know, even if i’d hate and slander them for it, cutting out james bond would be something i would understand. But messing with sherliam would fuck them over, not just cause that would be awful, but like, because it’s like... kind of the main point.

So I’m not really too worried about them messing with it, mostly because the content itself is holding them at gunpoint, sherliam holds the whole plot structure in place, especially if you’re shooting for final problem. And even in the manga they never, like, actually say they’re in love with each other even tho historically gay lovers would probably call each other “friends” lmao so it’s not like they have to greenlight gay sex or anything lmao it’s just Very Romantic (No Homo)

And apart from that, yuumori has actually been pretty decent to the gays so far?? Damn shawty, they certainly haven’t toned down the gay yet and it’s clearly their main source of fans, and what they’ve decided to emphasize in both openings and a significant portion of the s2 ending. We’re all here for it, and they’re catering to it, so I can at least give you that.

#moriarty the patriot #yukoku no moriarty #rowan's hyperfixation essays #sherliam #Holy Shitte this is long #watch me find 54 and immediately change my stance on all of this #or something idk #watch this whole thing be irrelevant in half a week #HHHHHHHH #if it doesn't go exactly like this i will lose my mind lmao

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ddarker-dreams · 5 years ago

Text

Online Love. Yan Shigaraki x Reader [Part 3]

Part 1

Part 2

From: [First] 9:45 PM

today was so much fuuuun (＾▽＾)

From: [First] 9:45 PM

thank you for spending time with me tomo-kun... let’s get together soon again, okay??（´・｀）♡

“Soon, huh?”

Shigaraki’s words are intended for no one. He strains his eyes on his phone, looking over each word you sent. He knows he should respond, but all words escape him as his mind remains blank. Grimacing at these unknown feelings, he finally thinks of a half decent response.

To: [First] 9:50 PM

We can

For some, he knows the short response wouldn’t be satisfactory. But for you, Shigaraki never needs to present himself other than how he is. You never critique his struggle with social etiquette, or set expectations for him. Maybe that’s the reason why he’s so drawn to you, unable to escape your thrall.

Minutes pass since he sent the message, his phone in hand awaiting your response. On nights like this, where there’s no League business to attend to, he can offer you his full attention. Normally the two of you would duo and play an MMOPRG until the early hours of the morning.

Earlier at the mall you mentioned that you had made plans with friends in the morning, and wouldn’t be able to play tonight. Shigaraki had nodded his head at the time, but now that he’s all alone without your company, it hits him.

He misses you.

The thought alone is fleeting, but makes his stomach churn nonetheless. It was so unlike him, to have such doting feelings for someone. The sickeningly sweet sensation left a bitter taste in his mouth. To think that a murderer like him would have his knees turned to jelly by you so much as smiling.

Shigaraki hears a buzz, realizing that’s your response. Wasting no time, bloodshot eyes look over your response.

From: [First] 9:52 PM

i can’t wait!!!! i felt sad leaving, but yknow, life and all right? ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚

Shigaraki fights off waves of exhaustion, not wanting to miss out on interaction with you.

From: [First] 9:53 PM

u should come over my place next! i dunno if u will like my set up, it’s not the sleekest but it works just fine...

From: [First] 9:54 PM

wait that sounds kinda weird doesnt it??? im sorry if i sound pushy or anything, i just think itd be fun to game together, even if we just do gacha games! none of my friends are into this stuff so i’ve always wondered what it’d be like to just chill at home instead of going out (´Ａ｀。)

This is how you always are, getting flustered over the littlest things. Shigaraki doesn’t understand why you find so many things embarrassing, but there’s a cute quality to it.

Being alone with you in private would be a dream come true, but could he really contain himself?

In public there was a constant public presence that forced him to not act out. It would be excruciatingly difficult to not hold you and never let go if given the chance. Shigaraki is aware of himself enough to know that he acts out on impulse often.

To: [First] 9:55 PM

That sounds better than going out, whatever you want

Even if watching you squirm in an attempt to validate your previous words is tempting, he wants to affirm your plans as fast as he can. The mere thought of being alone with you is enough to cause his heart to beat at an unhealthy rate, a grin stretching across his face.

He would have every aspect of you then. All of your attention would be on him, all of your cute idiosyncrasies on display for him and him alone. Shigaraki wouldn’t have to concern himself with a Hero randomly appearing and exposing him, or deal with the looks he got in public for his shrouded appearance.

It’d only be you.

His hand grips his phone tighter in excitement, vision growing blurry.

You, you, you, you, you, you--

From: [First] 9:57 PM

aa what a relief *:ﾟ*⋆ฺ(*´◡`) i’ll have to think of a good date!

From: [First] 9:58 PM

tomo-kun... thank u for everything. i like talking to u

Shigaraki inhales through his nose sharply, unsure if he read the words displayed on his phone right. He reads it once, then twice. Three times. Then four.

From: [First] 10:00 PM

i’m a lil sappy aren’t i? hopefully u dont mind. i was just thinking that i can really be myself around u. u always listen to me and never complain about my rambling, it just makes me happyyy ー( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

From: [First] 10:03 PM

i’ve been called annoying a few times. it’s probably true but u never make me feel like im bothering u. idk why im saying all this lmaooo

How anyone could degrade you in that manner is beside him. He would kill anyone if they spoke about you like that, but Shigaraki realizes that wouldn’t be a comforting sentiment to send right now. Ah, shit. How do you comfort people again? It’s not exactly his forte...

To: [First] 10:08 PM

You’re fine, don’t worry

To: [First] 10:08 PM

It’s nice talking

Shigaraki’s fingernails begin to scrape against the sensitive skin of his neck, his lip being gnawed at relentlessly. Will you find this off putting? Should he have said something else? Or did he say too much and weird you out. If you ever were to reject him in any form, even he is unsure of what he’d do.

From: [First] 10:10 PM

tomo-kuuuuuuun (´;︵;`)

From: [First] 10:10 PM

thank u, it means a lot. i should probably head off soon... it’s getting late

From: [First] 10:11 PM

goodnight <333 thank u for today! i’ll talk to u tomorrow and we can game if ur up to it!

Ceasing his harmful actions, Shigaraki pulls his hand away to respond. Ignoring the warmth of blood traveling down his neck, he hurriedly types a response to you.

To: [First] 10:11 PM

Goodnight [First]

From: [First] 10:12 PM

o(≧∇≦o)

He thinks he might be in love after all.

#tomura shigaraki x reader #tomura shigaraki imagine #yandere tomura shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki tomura imagine #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #bnha imagine #bnha #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #yandere bnha #my hero academia imagine #my hero academia #my stuff

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eleanorfenyxwrites · 4 years ago

Text

After Each Midnight Begins A New Day

[Extra #5 - @threephasebird requested that the next extra be some Jin Sibs and Xuanli’s horde of children so here it is! This is (mostly) set post-fic, just as 3zun are on their way to Jinlintai to visit at the end of the last chapter]

[Masterpost]

A quick brief on the children’s names and ages:

Jin Ling (金凌 - rise above) - First son, 20

Jin Fei (金飞 - to fly) - Second son, 17

Jin Yu (金雨 - rain) and Jin Yan (金焰 - fire) - First and Second daughters, 14

Jin Zhuang (金庄 - solemn) - Third son, 12

Jin Lu (金露 - dew) - Third daughter, 7

Jin Ye (金烨 - breathtaking/blaze of fire) - Fourth daughter, 3

As a young boy, Jin Zixuan had often wondered when he would get a sibling. Everyone else had one, it seemed. The Lan Heir had a little brother. The Nie Heir did too. The Jiang Heir got two siblings which seemed like too many, and even those awful Wen boys had each other. He had asked his mother (when he was still young enough to be innocent of the politics of such matters) when he was going to get a didi or meimei of his own, but Madam Jin had just patted his hair and tapped the tip of his nose with her knuckle. It was too gentle of a touch to ever hurt whenever she did that, of course, but he always wrinkled his nose anyway to make her laugh.

Not long after that conversation, he hadn’t gotten a sibling but he had gotten a Mianmian.

She’s technically his shimei, of course, but that hardly matters to him. What does matter is that Luo Qingyang is nothing like the siblings he had imagined for himself when he had asked for one. For starters, she’s older than him by a month, which she makes sure to smugly remind him of at every opportunity. She’s really really polite to adults but annoyingly bossy to him when they get left alone to play. She’s reckless too, and more often than not Jin Zixuan just ends up pouting and dragging his feet as he follows along behind her wherever she wants to run, using his presence at her side as an excuse to sneak into every family-only part of Jinlintai that she can.

By the time they’re 10, though, he loves her fiercely as the sister he can understand by now that he’s never going to get to have. His parents hardly ever see each other, after all, and while he still isn’t totally sure how siblings are made he’s definitely sure that parents have to see each other more often than a few awkward meals a week for it to happen. It’s alright though, he has Mianmian to keep him company and make fun of him whenever he says something dumb (or yell at his cousins when they try to make fun of him for the same).

As they grow, she’s at his side for every important event in his life, as he is for hers. Every birthday, every New Year’s, every important training milestone they get to share. She’s even at his side for the meeting when they’re 14 where it’s announced that he is engaged to Jiang Yanli of the Yunmeng Jiang. Mianmian laughs for so long at that one once they’re alone that his own crushing panic recedes enough for him to punch her in the shoulder and tell her to knock it off, which of course does as little good as ever.

(To this day he still laughs when he remembers the look on her face when she’d heard he was going to get married one day - the shock followed by quickly-repressed snickers throughout the rest of the meeting that had been mercifully, tactfully ignored by the adults in attendance.)

Soon after they turn 16, they’re both there at the main hall the day that a boy who looks to be close to his own age presents himself at Jinlintai to ask for discipleship, claiming blood ties to...to Jin Guangshan as his reason for coming to Lanling all the way from Yunping, rather than going to the Jiang. Jin Zixan is helpless to do anything but watch on in wide-eyed shock as his father kicks the boy down all those stairs, Mianmian’s shocked gasp at his elbow echoing his own as everyone else in the vicinity watches on impassively. They watch together in fascinated horror from their hiding spot behind a large statue to the side of the stairs as the boy somehow manages to pick himself up off the ground at the bottom and bow to Jin Guangshan at the top of the tower with flawless form, the blood on his forehead and the stiffness in his chest as he bows visible even from where they are.

“Oh no,” Mianmian says softly under her breath when he turns to leave. “Do you think he’ll be alright?”

“Maybe...Hopefully,” he replies, numbly, still reeling from the idea that he might have...a brother? A half-brother? Certainly if his mother had given birth to the boy he wouldn’t have been living in Yunping, he would have been there in Lanling with the rest of the family. Besides, there’s no way Madam Jin had been pregnant with..twins (judging by their apparently similar ages) and he hadn’t known it, or no one had mentioned it. Either way - this boy thinks he’s Jin Zixuan’s brother, and his father has just kicked him down the stairs for it. In front of everybody. It’s..jarring, to say the least.

It isn’t long after the boy’s dejected departure from Jinlintai that Jin Zixuan is forced to confront his own feelings about the rumors of his father’s...exploits. Not that he hadn’t heard snippets of it before, snide comments muttered behind hands and under breaths, but they always seemed..unimportant. Just idle gossip, and Madam Jin has never been anything but perfectly (if a bit coldly) civil to Jin Guangshan in the rare times they’re in the same room. It had always seemed best to follow her example and ignore it, but now...well now there’s the boy who had come to them with an honest request, a valid one, and had been kicked down the tower for it, just for being physical proof of the rumors that had always circulated. He can’t ignore it any longer.

Jin Zixuan doesn’t know what to do about it, of course, and he eventually has to acknowledge that there’s nothing he can do, but that still doesn’t keep him from thinking about it until even Mianmian grows tired of his fretting over it all.

Despite his agonizing over the subject, when he sees the boy again in Cloud Recesses two years later as a retainer with the young Nie-gongzi, Jin Zixuan doesn’t even recognize him at first. He personally feels it’s justified considering the circumstances of the only time he had ever seen him (besides the fact that Jiang Yanli - perpetually trailed by her obnoxious brothers - is proving far more of a distraction than he had anticipated), but Mianmian still cuffs him on the ear for it once they’re in private.

“What are you going to say to him?” she demands at the end of her lecture about it, arms crossed over her chest and that mulish look on her face that he had learned to fear a long time ago.

“Wh-what would I even say to him?” he retorts quickly, horrified at the thorny social situation this presents. He isn’t even good at the normal ones, what is he supposed to say to his supposed half-brother who is living, breathing proof of an extramarital affair, and who has been resoundly refused entry into Jinlintai in such a horrible, public fashion? A half-brother who is, apparently, now a member of the Nie Sect and has gained enough of Nie-Zongzhu’s favor to be sent to Cloud Recesses during the lecture season to look after Nie Huaisang, who everyone knows Nie Mingjue doesn’t trust with just anybody…

Where to even begin?!

(Jin Zixuan also laughs about that now, how scared he had been of his brother and how unimpressed Mianmian had been with all of his arguments on his own behalf. He has never once in his life been good at arguing with her, after all.)

In the end, he’s lucky enough a couple of weeks into their studies to have an opportunity to pull Meng Yao aside and stammer through the apology he had rehearsed over the last few days with Mianmian’s help. He apologizes as profusely as he can manage for his father’s behavior towards him, as well as extends a tentative request that they get to know each other better as half-brothers even if Jin Guangshan won’t like it. None of it is polite or graceful, in fact he knows that some of it is inadvertently uncouth bordering on offensive, but Meng Yao still accepts all of it with wide-eyed surprise and, when Jin Zixuan finally stumbles to a verbal halt, with a small, affectionate smile on his handsome face.

----

He finds Mo Xuanyu next.

Word had reached him by letter one day from a woman in a small village who had finally worked up the courage to attempt to appeal to Jin Guangshan on their son’s behalf, only for her to find out from her sister, the Madam of the local main family, that Jin Guangshan is several years dead. She had appealed to him instead, of course, as the boy’s brother and Jin Zixuan had taken Jiang Yanli to Mo Manor with him so they could learn the truth for themselves.

Mo Xuanyu is...wary of meeting him, which Jin Zixuan doesn’t fault him for for a second. In fact he had expected it, which is partially why he had brought Jiang Yanli along (besides the fact that he also just enjoys traveling with his wife).

He meets with Second Madam Mo and her son in as neutral of a space as he can find - and alone, to begin with. It’s clear within minutes of observing the boy that he’s a Jin even before Second Madam Mo outlines the events that had given her her son. Jin Zixuan does his best to reassure her that Mo Xuanyu will be welcome as a visitor in Jinlintai should he wish to come, that he will be legitimized if he wants to be, and that he will be allowed to train with the other disciples as well whether he wants to be legitimized or not.

He doesn’t do a very good job of explaining it, unfortunately (nor does he think he managed a very good job of inspiring any sort of confidence in him as a leader, which is unfortunately a frequent occurrence without Jiang Yanli or Mianmian with him to help him talk). As is usually the case after such instances, he finds himself pleading with Jiang Yanli that evening for her help. The pair of them visit the Second Madam Mo and her son in their home on the Mo estate the following day, and Jiang Yanli charms them both so thoroughly that Mo Xuanyu agrees to pack his things and come home with them two days later, with his mother’s full support.

It quickly becomes clear once they arrive in Jinlintai and Mo Xuanyu settles into his cultivation training with some of the younger children that while he is a Jin in name (sort of) and looks, he is infinitely.. weirder than any other Jin that Jin Zixuan has ever met.

By now he and Meng Yao have both put in the work to have formed something of a decent - if still slightly stilted - relationship, and so he’s become well aware even in their relatively limited interactions that his brother works hard to be an unfailingly polite and graceful sort of gentleman. And of course he still thinks of Mianmian like a sister even now that he has made her his Second; and while her behavior is much more brash than his own or Meng Yao’s she still knows the rules of society and chooses to follow them whenever necessary. Besides, she’s a Luo, not a Jin, despite being raised pretty much exclusively in Jinlintai. She gets a free pass.

Mo Xuanyu had been cheerful enough during the trip to Jinlintai with Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli but also on his best behavior, and Jin Zixuan supposes (a bit too late) that being surprised by what has followed is his own fault for assuming that the boy’s nervousness and uncertainty during that trip with two strangers - powerful strangers - was a good representation of his permanent personality.

Long story short - Mo Xuanyu comes to Jinlintai and raises absolute hell.

Jiang Yanli adores him.

Mo Xuanyu clings to her like a burr in response, soaking up her indulgence and the unfailingly kind older-sister energy that she exudes at all times like he’s been desperate for it, for the gentle love of a woman as incredible as Jiang Yanli. And not that Jin Zixuan had ever planned on going back on his promise to legitimize the boy and maintain his offer of a place for him in Jinlintai, but now he truly can’t even begin to consider it after seeing how excited Mo Xuanyu is to find siblings, nieces and nephews, and friends there.

Jin Zixuan legitimizes his youngest brother in an official ceremony conducted by himself and Meng Yao after the first year of Mo Xuanyu’s cultivation training, once his golden core has formed and he is able to begin his true discipleship alongside the younger students at similar levels of cultivation - Jin Ling and his peers, in fact.

And Mo Xuanyu just...stays. His mother had traveled to Lanling to visit him a few times early on when he could take breaks from his training, but after she passes away Mo Xuanyu declares in the midst of his grief that without his mother there’s nothing and no one in Mo Manor to draw him back, and he becomes a permanent fixture of life in the tower - perpetual wild child Mo Xuanyu, with his insistence on wearing black and red clothing (which he swears has nothing to do with Wei Wuxian but he fools absolutely no one), his absolutely wildly dramatic personality, his equally dramatic makeup, his loud laughter.

He proves himself very quickly to be excellent for irritating the Sect elders whenever necessary, and Jin Zixuan privately enjoys watching the stuffy old men try to figure out how to handle his brother’s...unique brand of flamboyance. Of course he’s usually just as flummoxed as they are, the difference is that he’s very fond of it and they are definitely not.

These days, Mo Xuanyu’s position in Jinlintai is more secure than ever. He’s a source of fun and lightheartedness at family gatherings, he’s an attentive presence during the children’s lessons and he plays with them whenever they would like during their leisure time. He’s a wonderful brother and uncle, in his own way, and a cheerful presence wherever he goes.

He also makes for a good litmus test, of sorts. Everyone who deals with the Jin Sect regularly knows of him by now, and Jin Zixuan has gotten into the habit of making sure to keep a careful eye on anyone who dares to step into his home and speak unduly harshly about his youngest sibling. He learned early on to be wary of how that sort of rigid attitude may negatively impact policies they plan to propose or favors they need to ask. He’s also not above deploying Mo Xuanyu himself to handle them in the most obscenely awkward ways he can devise - and those are many and varied. Jin Zixuan himself had stopped getting embarrassed by it a long time ago out of a sense of self-preservation, but others are not so fortunate.

And that had been enough.

Two surprise brothers plus a Mianmian (not to mention his six brothers-in-law plus his and Jiang Yanli’s four children with their fifth on the way at the time) had been more family than he had ever dared to dream of, let alone knew what to do with now that he had it.

But then, not long after Mo Xuanyu’s declaration at 16 that he will be remaining in Jinlintai for the rest of his life if at all possible, Jin Zixuan and Meng Yao take a short trip together to Laoling Qin to discuss a bit of trade business.

Qin Cangye had very politely requested that any discussions they needed to have with him be held in his own home as his wife was too ill to travel, and with Mianmian to run things in his stead in Lanling for a few days (and as many nurses as Jiang Yanli could ever need to help with the children for the short-term) he had been more than willing to travel to accommodate. He had also been perfectly happy to conduct the business they needed to with nothing that threatened to distract him - right up until their second full evening in the Qin home when Meng Yao had approached him in his room after dinner, unusually serious even for him, and told Jin Zixuan that he needed to listen to something important Madam Qin wanted to tell them.

He had listened to her and her handmaid, and he had believed them, and he had been unsurprised to find himself thinking quite uncharitably of his father following his promise to Madam Qin that he would do everything in his power to make it right, as much as he could.

They return to Jinlintai the day after the next, once their business is concluded. He’s relieved when nothing needs his immediate attention as it means he’s free to retreat into his and Jiang Yanli’s quarters so he can tell her everything that’s weighing on his mind.

“No more surprise siblings from now on,” he sighs into the comfort of Jiang Yanli chest when he’s finished outlining what has happened and his plans to prepare a new suite of rooms in the family wing of the tower. For Qin Su. His sister.

Jiang Yanli just laughs her tinkling laugh and kisses him, her hands gentle as she combs his hair back from his face with her fingertips. “You’ve got more siblings now than any of the rest of us,” she teases with a mischievous smile down at him that is a bit too reminiscent of, weirdly, both Wei Wuxian and Mo Xuanyu for comfort. “Two brothers, a sister, and of course we must keep Mianmian in her spot on the list. If you would like to count brothers-in-law as well you’ve also got A-Xian, A-Cheng, Huaisang, Wangji, Xichen, and Mingjue...”

He groans and hides his face properly in the soft silk of her robes even as she laughs again over his head.

“Young boys who ask their mothers for more siblings should be careful what they ask for, shouldn’t they?” Another kiss, this time to his cheek, and he accepts it with a sigh. He certainly can’t deny that his misguided childhood jealousy has certainly been made null. He has a much bigger family than he could have ever imagined.

It’s nice to feel that, finally, Jinlintai is full to bursting with people who genuinely care about him, and who he is allowed to care about in return.

----

Most of that happened long enough ago, though, that these days Jin Zixuan actually has some trouble bringing the memories back to the surface at first demand (though he knows that he’ll never truly forget the ways he had come to know - and subsequently legitimize - all three of his biological siblings).

“A-Xuan?” Jiang Yanli calls now from the doorway of his personal office. Her voice is as soft as always, but it’s tinged with his favorite variety of amusement - the kind caused by the mischief of any member of their (enormous) family. He looks up to find her holding a letter from Gusu judging by the distinctive blue, one eyebrow raised and a smile on her lips. “Were you aware that A-Yu has apparently been begging A-Yao to pay us a visit for over a month?”

“No I wasn’t, but I’m not surprised,” he replies with a sigh and a shake of his head. He loves Mo Xuanyu, of course he does, but he will readily admit that the ever-unbridled chaos of his youngest brother still makes him wonder how they’re related even now over a decade into their relationship. “Can I assume that A-Yao and our brothers-in-law have caved to his demands?” he adds with a gesture towards the letter. Jiang Yanli tucks a gentle laugh into the embroidered cuff of her sleeve.

“They have indeed, A-Yu will be so pleased. They’ve asked to spend a while here though - longer than their last few visits have been at least but A-Yao didn’t specify precisely how long they’d like. I’m going to tell them that anything they want is perfectly fine, unless you have a reason not to accept?”

“No, there’s nothing I can think of. Did they say why they want to stay so long? Is everything alright?”

“They didn’t say, but I think they’re fine. A-Yao only says here that they need a change of scenery for a while and A-Chen suggested they travel. I’ll go ahead and send our acceptance, then?”

Jin Zixuan nods and returns to the report he’s reading. After so many years together, though, he knows enough about his wife not to be surprised when she steps further into the room to put a hand on his shoulder and lean down to press her forehead against his temple for a long, quiet moment. He lets his eyes drift shut as he takes a deep breath in of the familiar scent of the lotus-scented oil she wears in her hair and the hint of incense still clinging to her skin from her morning meditation to help strengthen her core.

“I’ll be playing with the children in the garden when you’re finished if you’d like to come find us,” she murmurs against his cheek and punctuates it with a kiss, offering him precisely what he needs after a long morning of dealing with Sect business - both with the affectionate gesture and with the promise of getting to enjoy spending time with her and their children.

He doesn’t mind being Sect Leader of course, and in fact the job is much easier these days than he had ever expected it to be when he had been a young teenager observing the workings of it under his father’s...less than dedicated hand. But he still privately thinks sometimes that he’s much more cut out for corralling his and Jiang Yanli’s children than he is the Jin Sect.

“Make sure Ling-er practices his sword forms, either against a training dummy or the twins if they want to play with him.”

Jiang Yanli’s quiet chuckle against his cheek is one of his favorite sounds in the world.

“You already know they’d love to team up and see if they can finally win against him. I’ll fetch their practice swords in case they want to use them. You’ll join us, won’t you?”

“Of course,” he reassures, turning his head to look up at her and meet her smile with one of his own. “I wouldn’t miss it.”

----

“All I’m saying Li-jie,” Mo Xuanyu posits loudly from the ground where he’s currently buried under a small mountain of gold robes, flailing limbs, and shrieks of laughter, “Is that if you’ve already got seven you might as well go for an even ten, wouldn’t that be satisfying?!”

“A-Yu,” Qin Su admonishes from a bench nearby, not even bothering to look up from her embroidery. “If you think the children need more playfellows I’m sure we could find you a wonderful husband to adopt your own children with.”

“Absolutely not! Can you imagine me as a father? Disastrous. But if you’re offering to play matchmaker I might actually take you up on that.”

“No matchmaking, you two,” Jin Zixuan sighs as he enters the private family garden and joins Jiang Yanli where she’s sitting at the edge of her lotus pond trailing her fingertips through the water and watching the chaos that is their family unfold around her with a beatific smile on her lips. “Please, I’m begging you, our family is already confusing enough and you’ve both promised me you have no intentions of marrying. Since when do you even want to get married, A-Yu?”

“Listen to me very carefully, A-Xuan - ” he starts with a meaningful waggle of his darkened brows, “I look at what A-Yao has, if you know what I mean, and then I look at what I have, and I just think there’s definitely some room for..improvement in my situation, that’s all.”

Jin Zixuan lifts his chin a bit to give his responding eye-roll the best effect he can while Jiang Yanli and Qin Su both giggle into their sleeves and Jin Ling makes a disgusted noise in the back of his throat that carries all the way across the garden.

“Okay first of all, don’t talk about Uncle Jue and Uncle Chen like that, that’s disgusting.”

“Well they’re not my uncles, kid, I can talk about them however I want.”

“Second of all - hey! Quit calling me ‘kid’, we’re the same generation!”

“Enough, you two,” Zixuan sighs to head off the too-familiar argument that Mo Xuanyu is clearly working himself up for with one of his signature borderline-manic grins that makes most Sect Leaders shrink away in fear. “Lu-er, Xiao-Ye let your Uncle Yu get up off the ground, please.” It takes a moment for their two youngest daughters to untangle themselves from where they’ve tackled Mo Xuanyu to the ground but once they’re free they come running to him instead to clamber into his lap, little Jin Ye throwing her arms around his neck and snuggling into his chest immediately as Jin Lu tucks herself into his side under his free arm to start playing with his fingers.

Jin Zixuan sighs again as Mo Xuanyu makes a little show out of rolling to his feet and readjusting his hair and clothes, dabbing at his makeup to make sure nothing has smudged in the tussle. He dusts himself off one more time with a definitive pat before winking and turning his crooked grin on Jin Ling. Their eldest son is waiting for Jin Yu and Jin Yan to get their breath back from their latest bout against him - the twins leaning their weights on their wooden practice swords and clutching their sides - which means that he has no excuse not to listen to Mo Xuanyu’s teasing. (Jin Zhuang, he notices, is sitting on the other side of their sparring circle in a patch of shade cast by a tree and the side of the closest building - well away from the antics of his siblings - to alternate between watching the sparring and practicing his painting on a portable little desk balanced on his knees.)

“Listen to your wise old uncle, Xiao-Ling,” Mo Xuanyu teases, recalling Jin Zixuan’s attention to him and Jin Ling. “You’ll understand when you get to be my age just how nice it might be to have a big strong husband or two to look after you!”

“We’re classmates!!” Jin Ling insists again, beginning to sound desperate as his face goes bright red - though whether it’s out of embarrassment from the teasing about husbands or irritation at being needled about his age is unclear. Jin Zixuan suspects it’s a bit of both.

“A-Yu come help me finish unpacking from my trip before you send our nephew into qi-deviation. I’ll teach you a new huadian to wear as repayment,” Qin Su calls as she stands, graceful as ever. She tucks her embroidery into her sleeve and holds her arm out for Mo Xuanyu to take; he can never resist dramatic gestures and true to form his entire face lights up with mischievous delight, the expression exaggerated by the dark lines of kohl around his eyes, his painted lips, and his rouged cheeks. He bounds over to her to take her proffered arm with a comically genteel air, sweeping her gallantly from the courtyard towards her suite of rooms with such over-the-top fawning that they can hear her sweet laughter bouncing off of the nearby buildings even after they’ve turned the corner out of sight of the garden.

“Dad - ,” Jin Ling pouts, eyebrows drawn down.

“He’ll tire of the joke soon enough, A-Ling,” Jiang Yanli soothes with poorly-concealed mirth before Jin Zixuan can reply similarly. “There are worse things than having an uncle who enjoys a bit of teasing every now and then. Show your father your new sword forms now that you’re warmed up, you’ve been doing so well.”

Jin Zixuan settles his youngest daughters more comfortably in his arms as the twins return to their ready stances against their oldest brother, identical steely glints of focus in their eyes as they resume their sparring. Jin Zhuang brings his painting desk out of the shade to settle in with him and Jiang Yanli now that they’ve created a peaceful center for the family to orient themselves around, and Jin Zixuan feels his chest grow warm with affection as he relaxes into the soothing patterns of quality time with his children.

There are, he thinks, much worse ways to spend an afternoon.

----

Most people, Jin Zixuan thinks, would likely be surprised to find that as wild as their family is, dinners together are frequently calm affairs. Tonight is slightly more raucous than usual as Jin Fei has just returned from the first night hunt he’s led by himself, but it’s still much calmer than any outside observer would have reason to expect from them.

Jin Fei has finished giving his report - with none of the extra boasting that his older brother would pepper into the story were it his to tell - when Jiang Yanli clears her throat delicately for attention, which all of the children dutifully give her. (Well, except for little Jin Ye, who’s busy clambering into Mo Xuanyu’s lap so that she can smile sweetly up at him to demand he feed her the rest of her dinner).

“We received a letter yesterday from your uncles in Cloud Recesses,” she begins with a soft smile, “and you all owe your Uncle Yu a thank you for asking Uncle Yao to come and visit - they have accepted his invitation and will arrive within the week.”

There’s a general excited commotion as all the children start talking at once - beginning with their thanks to Mo Xuanyu as instructed and then shouting to and over each other as they begin arguing over who’s going to get to spend the most time with them.

“WHAT?!” Mo Xuanyu practically screeches, much to Jin Ye’s displeasure if her pout and hands over her ears are anything to go by. “I’ve been bugging him for weeks and he writes to you to accept?! The nerve! The gall!”

“A-Yu,” Jiang Yanli giggles while Jin Zixuan glares at his youngest brother for daring to be offended by anything involving Jiang Yanli.

“Ah sorry Li-jie, sorry. But Su-jie, back me up! He should have replied to me!”

“Li-jie is Madam Jin,” Qin Su replies implacably with a soft smile at Jiang Yanli. “It is proper for him to address a request to visit us to her before you, and A-Yao always follows proper etiquette.”

“Betrayal,” he accuses with a jab of his chopsticks in her direction that’s firm enough to make the ornaments in his hair jingle. “Betrayal by my own jiejie, I don’t believe this. Xiao-Ye, can you believe your aunts?” He directs the last to the toddler in his lap who’s reaching out for one of his dumplings with a bare hand - he immediately pinches it between his chopsticks to hold it in front of her mouth for her so she can munch on little nibbles of it. “Xiao-Ye is the only person in this family who loves and respects me, I’m stealing her and running away with her to escape your cruelty.”

“That’s not true, Uncle Yu,” Jin Yan pipes up around her next bite, which she quickly swallows when Jin Zixuan gives her a look. “Uncle Xian thinks you’re alright sometimes too,” she teases with that wicked grin of hers and Jin Zixuan has to duck his head to hide a smile at the wounded noise Mo Xuanyu offers by way of reply before he settles in to grumble to himself while he feeds Jin Ye like the little princess she already is.

“Father?” Jin Zhuang says softly from where he has come to stand beside him. Jin Zixuan leans over a bit, away from the table, to make it easier for their third son to step close enough to speak as quietly as he likes. “May I show Uncle Chen my paintings?”

“I think he would like that, Zhuang-er, that’s a good idea,” Jin Zixuan replies in an undertone with a nod. “If you ask him to, he may even paint with you. Have you finished your dinner?” Jin Zhuang nods and steps closer to his side as there’s a sudden burst of laughter from Jin Yu and Jin Yan at whatever Jin Ling has just said. “Would you like to go somewhere quiet until it’s calmer in here?” Another nod from Jin Zhuang which Jin Zixuan returns with one of his own. “Alright, that’s fine. I’ll send Aunt Su to come and fetch you when your siblings and Uncle Yu have settled again, okay? Don’t go far.”

Jin Zhuang offers him a quick bump of his head against his before he retreats, slipping out of one of the side doors to go wait in the quiet of the hallway until things are less overwhelming. Jin Zixuan turns back to the rest of his family who are still discussing what they’d like to do now that they know they’ll have fresh entertainment.

“Do you think Uncle Jue will spar with all four of us at once? We could probably take him out, don’t you think A-Ling?”

“You two couldn’t even beat me and Uncle Jue is like, twice my age!”

“Size, too,” Jin Fei drawls.

“Well we can’t all be Nies, and you’re still shorter than me!” Jin Ling huffs with a punch to his second brother’s shoulder.

“Shut up you two, stop arguing for just five minutes, you’re so annoying. Yanyan is right - four of us together against one, we could do it!”

“You want to fight Uncle Jue?!” Jin Lu pipes up in horror. “Why?!!”

“It’s alright A-Lu, don’t be upset. It’s the same reason the four of us train with our swords together, or like when we practice with dad sometimes,” Jin Fei is quick to reassure while Jin Ling is busy sticking his tongue out at the twins. “It’s fun for us and it’s good training, we don’t want to actually hurt Uncle Jue.”

“He’ll kick your bratty little butts anyway, and I’ll bet he does it without even breaking a sweat,” Mo Xuanyu asserts as he wipes Jin Ye’s face clean with a bit of his sleeve. “There you go sweetheart, all done. Go sit with your mom so Uncle Yu can finish eating.” Jin Ye stands up obediently to come around the table, clamber into Jiang Yanli’s extended arms to settle in the cradle of her lap, and promptly close her eyes.

“He would not!” Jin Ling argues instantly, of course.

“Would so. He’s been training with a saber - bigger than a sword, remember - since he was younger than you and I were when we first touched our swords, Lingling. And A-Fei is right, he’s got height, weight, and bulk on his side. He’ll kick your butts.”

“Well I want to try anyway,” Jin Yu reasserts as Jin Yan nods along beside her. “If nothing else we can turn it into a game to see just how quickly he can beat us, if it turns out we really can’t beat him.”

“Oh that’s a good idea. A-Zhuang could keep score, right? Hey. Where’d he go?” Jin Ling looks around sharply, searching for his third brother.

“You were all yelling so he left,” Jin Yan supplies, talking with her mouth full again.

“Oh. Oops.”

“You can apologize when he comes back,” Qin Su offers before looking at Jiang Yanli. “Li-jie, we should arrange to have tea with just A-Yao at least a few times while they’re here. He needs to catch us up on his gossip and we need to tell him ours.”

“I’m sure he’ll accept, it’s been far too long since the three of us have sat down to talk together,” Jiang Yanli replies, and as if by magic the atmosphere settles again as the children respond automatically to the gentle steadiness of their mother and aunt. “I believe Zhuang-er will be able to come back in now,” Jiang Yanli adds with a pointed look at the children that warns them to keep their calm for the rest of the meal for their brother’s sake.

They all nod and return to eating and chatting at a more reasonable volume as Qin Su rises to poke her head out into the corridor. She returns immediately with Jin Zhuang at her side, his hand in hers until he releases it to return to his seat between the twins.

“A-Zhuang,” Jin Fei says once he’s seated across from him. “We’re sorry for being too loud. If we come up with a game to play with Uncle Jue can you keep score for us? You’re the best at watching and keeping track of what happens while we spar. A-Lu can call out whatever you need to say to us while we play.”

Jin Zhuang takes a long moment to consider this in silence, as is his habit, before he nods once firmly and picks up his teacup to take a slow sip while his older brothers and sisters grin first at him then at each other.

“This is going to be so fun,” Jin Lu gushes with a dreamy little sigh into her soup that makes all of her older siblings laugh, even Jin Zhuang with his silent chuckle hidden behind his hand.

Jin Zixuan looks around the table at their family - loving, loud, wild, and theirs, and, not for the first time nor the last, wonders just how in the world he got so lucky.

----

By some small miracle, he and Jiang Yanli manage to gather all the children and get them looking presentable enough in time to greet their uncles when they arrive several days later. He looks for some sign as they approach that something is secretly wrong to have prompted the visit, but they seem alright at first glance. Of course any closer examination that could possibly tell him otherwise is abruptly made completely impossible when they’re promptly swarmed by all of the children save for Jin Ling and Jin Fei, both of whom are too old to run to them and cling around waists and knees to better clamor for gifts and stories with the rest of their siblings.

Jin Zixuan can only shake his head with fond dismay as he watches Jin Ye immediately try to cling to Meng Yao in between his husbands while Jin Zhuang drifts over to stop next to Lan Xichen so that he can stay away from the main hubbub and still slip one hand into his uncle’s with amusing gravity. Jin Lu studies the three of them for a moment before she decides to hug Lan Xichen first as he’s the easiest target, her tiny arms wrapping tightly around his legs as she clings. Nie Mingjue, of course, is immediately swamped by the twins who flank him to start talking about something with broad gestures - he sees Jin Yan make a stabbing motion after a moment and Jin Zixuan realizes they’re likely talking about their newest obsession - knives. A father’s dream.

“Out of my way brats, those are my brothers!” Mo Xuanyu suddenly shouts as he comes streaking out from the nearest building, practically a blur of black and red aimed straight at Meng Yao who has lifted little Jin Ye up in front of himself in his arms to better listen to her intently as she babbles to him.

“A-Yu!” Jin Zixuan chastises tiredly with a sigh even as Nie Mingjue sticks an arm out to catch Mo Xuanyu in midair right at the last moment before he can barrel into any of the children or Meng Yao, who, to his credit, hasn’t even twitched (though Jin Zixuan is absolutely sure that he knew Mo Xuanyu had been running straight for him). He always manages to forget how strong Nie Mingjue is until he sees an example like that; he hadn’t even jolted when Mo Xuanyu’s full weight had collided with his arm, and while Jin Zixuan won’t ever claim to be attracted to any of his brothers-in-law, he’s also not blind to the virtues of men. He can at least admit that he doesn’t fault Mo Xuanyu for his desire to find someone like that for himself.

“Mo Xuanyu,” Nie Mingjue greets, as gruff as ever with his brows drawn low over his eyes and his expression stony. He stares just long enough to make Mo Xuanyu laugh a bit nervously before he drops him back on his feet to reach down and pick up Jin Lu, who has released Lan Xichen in favor of tugging on Nie Mingjue’s belt and holding her arms up to him in silent request. She settles happily on his hip like she belongs there as he resumes his conversation with the twins, her head instantly landing on his shoulder and one hand curling around the collar of his robes as she snuggles in.

As always, watching his brother and brothers-in-law interact with the children does something funny in his chest, and just as he’s thinking of reaching down to take Jiang Yanli’s hand next to his to try to do something with that feeling, she slips it comfortably into the crook of his elbow as she lays her head on his shoulder in silent understanding and agreement.

There will be a formal banquet to welcome them later, of course. But for now the only people around are the members of the family themselves and those who have been living and working in Jinlintai long enough to have seen the rather informal comings and goings of every member of the extended family. There’s nothing official about this greeting, just loved ones reuniting. Happy. Together.

Jin Zixuan glances over to Jin Ling at his left when his son nudges him with an elbow only to find him smirking over at him. His son doesn’t even have to look up at him to do it anymore, and Jin Zixuan still can’t quite pinpoint when that happened.

“Tearing up, dad?” Jin Ling jokes, jerking his chin up in a proud gesture that Jin Zixuan will deny having ever been the example for him to learn from until the day he dies.

“You say that like he doesn’t cry every time any of our uncles come to visit,” Jin Fei sighs from the other side of Jiang Yanli. His posture is relaxed enough - he’s got his arms crossed loosely behind himself and his head tipped back as if studying the clouds and his tone is light and easy. The laid-back attitude is only marred by the fact that there’s clearly a teasing smirk dancing on his lips. “You didn’t cry for me when I got back from my night hunt the other evening. Should I be jealous, dad?”

“Boys,” Jiang Yanli cuts in to chastise with all the affection she can muster - which is, of course, quite a lot. “Your father enjoys having everyone home, that’s all. Be good and go say hello to your uncles, I’m sure they’ve missed you.”

They snicker but step away without any further argument, closing ranks immediately to walk across the courtyard shoulder-to-shoulder so they can put their heads together to laugh about something - Jin Zixuan, most likely.

“They look alright, don’t you think?” Jiang Yanli murmurs.

“I do. I’ll ask A-Yao to be sure when I can see him in private, but I think you were right - there doesn’t seem to be anything urgent.”

“A relaxed family visit, then,” she sighs happily, clearly smiling as she nuzzles her cheek a little more firmly against his shoulder and he drops a kiss to the top of her head before she straightens back up again. “It’ll be so lovely to have them here.”

“I’ve missed them,” he admits for her ears alone and Jiang Yanli squeezes the crook of his elbow in silent understanding.

#The untamed fanfic #Xuanli #Jin Zixuan #Jiang Yanli #Mo Xuanyu #Qin Su #3zun #right at the end #if anyone sees any issues with the names for all these children please don't hesitate to tell me I'm totally fine with changing #anything that should have been different to be more accurate #y'all would not believe the amount of age math I've done for all of this please don't look at any of it too closely #also if anyone wants my MANY headcanons in a bullet-list format let me know and I'll post some #there are Many of them with so many fun oc's lol #also if anything about the children or anything is unclear don't hesitate to ask for clarification!#oh headcanons can be about mianmian too even tho I didn't give her any real screentime in this (sorry!)

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life-rewritten · 4 years ago

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DISMAYS VS RELIEFS AKA REVIEW/RANTS OF BL IN SEPTEMBER NOVEMBER

It's been an interesting experience this past few months. BL came back in full force, took mostly all days in the week and you know what? It surprised the hell out of me. Mostly because I was moving back and forth from the decision of whether to stop watching or to wait and trust something extraordinary would happen like last year. And then October/November happened before I knew it I was falling again for some storylines, I was excited again to analyse and talk about these shows, and also I was incredibly grateful for some of the messages I received from these shows, they educated me, humbled me and even pushed me to my own version of self-acceptance, learning and love. So there are some disappointments with some of the shows mentioned here, but overall I'm grateful we got to see these shows and wait for them every week to air. This is the first part of this list because in another two weeks I have more shows ending. December is shaking!

Ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these shows?

DISMAYS

1. MY GEAR AND MY GOWN

Genre/Themes: Romance, Melodrama, Angst, Drama, Friendship, Unrequited Love, Family

Country: Thailand

Verdict:

Um, this show. I've been through a lot with this show, I've been angry, frustrated, tired, annoyed but weirdly I love this show, by the end of the finale, this show left me with warmth and this energy of bliss and joy. I realised that the reason why I was so harsh to this show was because of the potential I saw when I first saw the first episode. I fell in love because I could tell it was symbolic, it was deep, and it also had interesting devices used to tell the plot. Who knew that the pacing and directing of this show would nearly leave me mad and furious because it could have been better. This is all on the director, and sometimes the actors, they weren't expressive enough, they weren't emotional enough, and they didn't entirely sell me on what they were meant to be feeling. Sometimes it felt awkward and stiff and unbelievable, and at those times, I felt disappointed and bored. But the characters of this show and especially some actors (FIAT and JJ) really stole my heart without me wanting them to. I fell in love with the couples, I loved analysing them and feeling their angst and understanding their character dynamics. I lived for their friendship and enjoyed watching how it all came together. Even some of the romantic scenes made me swoon and excited, and I was just so happy to watch these couples choose each other.

I also think the relationship dynamics, whilst sometimes annoying, was actually sweet and wholesome. Itt and Pai's love is so cute and memorable, and I understood why they wanted each other, they both helped each other so much, and I thought it was beautiful. Pure and Folk; everything, no words, they were incredible despite rushed and late, I enjoyed watching their love on my screen, and it left me so disappointed that we could have had more if the pacing was done right. Either way, despite the rants and criticisms this show was a gem to me, one of my favourites just because of the couple dynamics. I will miss it, and I will miss analysing it. But please NEW sort your self out, and stop with the slow pace directing; you're killing your shows, (just my opinion) but you're making me dread the shows I've been so excited for in 2021, and I really pray you won't ruin them. Nough said.

Ratings:3.8/5 I can't rate it higher, but I do think it deserves credit, this show is very underrated as much as it annoyed me it's actually a decent show, it's very educational sometimes. It also has character development and growth. The romances are sweet and definitely should be paid attention to.

2. A CHANCE TO LOVE/ LOVE BY CHANCE SEASON 2

Genre/Themes: Comedy, Romance, Drama, Friendship, Rich, poor dynamic,

Country: Thailand

Verdict:

MGAYG was not the only show that New produced/ directed. There was this atrocity. No offence to everyone who loved this show, I love TinCan, I like most of the couples of the show, I didn't even complain when the show was rebooted, I didn't complain when there was not enough plot for the side couples for the first 8 episodes. But what annoys the hell out of me with this show is the lazy writing. I am so disappointed with this show, I realised that by the finale I was just tired and I was only watching it for some actors not even characters ( I was watching it to see a glimpse of Meen and Est), and it really made me sad. Because I started off with this show a bundle of joy, to see Tin and Can fall in love with each other again, I ignored when the haters said it was boring, awkward or stiff. I even accepted the massive amounts of product placement that was placed lazily and annoyingly. I was ready to forgive everything with this show. But I ended up feeling slighted, not me the actors should feel slighted, Cooheart, Mark Siwat, Gun, Title, Meen, Est should feel slighted by this show because this show wasted their potentials and only showed them for minutes in the whole 12 hours that this show aired for. I am so angry at the writer because she was lazy. She had clocked out when it came to this script (Though I don't blame her when everyone kept on sending her threats to how she told the previous story, she silenced her own creative ideas and muted everything, hence why Kengla and Techno's story was destroyed and became lazy and not needed and confusing, and Tum and Tar and Keen made no sense). Mame had given up on this show long before it aired.

But as much as I am disappointed at her for doing so, I also have to take this back to New, he's the person again who ruined this show with his pacing and directing. I love New, but this year it wasn't it, he is the main flaw in both his shows, he doesn't know when to pace things properly, he rushes plots at the end, and he doesn't give enough time to side couples for them to make sense. He did well in season 1 I think, but this season was atrocious. I am heavily disappointed, and I want to forget this show exists. I do have to give credit to Mean because I think he carried the show, I think Plan was cute but he was uncomfortable, and he ruined a lot of moments for me despite how much I love his chemistry with Mean. So yeh LBC was a disappointment, but it still holds a special place in my heart because I did care about the cast (maybe not as much anymore because of their homophobia) but LBC was one of my first loved BLs to see such a disappointing follow up is just heartbreaking.

Ratings:2.9/5 I couldn't bring my self to rate it even a three because I genuinely don't want to rewatch or think about this show again that's a pity because I genuinely love TinCan and MeenEst. But hey ho, c'est la vie.

RELIEFS

Gaya Sa Pelikula

Genre/Themes: Romance, Drama, Comedy, Angst, LGBTQ+ Education, Contract relationship, Haters to lovers

Country: Philippines

Verdict: We finally reached the end. And the way I didn't want this show to end, is just too much. I completed this show on the floor sobbing, clenching my heart and just reflecting and thinking about everything. One I was in shock, wasn't expecting something like this when I first watched this show. I had a lot of doubts despite the sneaky light in my heart from the comedy and energy and charisma from the show. I fell. Hard. For everything. Before I knew it, Fridays meant everything to me, if I could get to keep watching this show, it made laugh, smile, cry, weep, and it made me think and learn. It's weird how a show can mean so much to people, this show wasn't for me, it was a love letter to the LGBTQ+ community, a beautiful one, and with everybody's reaction, I think I can say for all of us, that this show was a masterpiece. It had everything, a plot that was so deep, interesting and unique, characters that felt real, understandable and relatable, lessons that made everyone think and question how they acted, how they viewed things, what we say, how we consider our selves, what is our story that we want to tell to the world?

It's just incredible, not only that this show had terrific production, directing, acting and music that will stick with me for a long time. The music was perfectly used, perfectly mixed in, and it touched everyone's heart. This show left me feeling healed, it was weird, I don't know how to relate to the struggles of Internalised homophobia, but I get anxiety, I get feeling like you're not the main character in your story, I get feeling like your life was already planned out and your dreams don't matter, I get hiding and running away from the world and finding a place to stay in your head and find peace and I get feeling overlooked and misunderstood. Overall I get the fight for self healing, acceptance and love. And Vlad and Karl went through that, and it was so beautiful to see them grow and become what they wanted to be, even if they couldn't be together because of that. Everything including the side characters in this show meant something, each had their own story, flaws and importance for why they were there, and I loved it. Words can't explain how good this show is, and the fact that no one came into it, knowing anything is just such inspirational and hopeful thing, out there, there are content and stories to consume that can teach and affect you and make you want to do something with your own. And Gaya Sa pelikula was one of those for me. I don't wanna say Goodbye, and hopefully, we get to see them again soon.

Ratings: 5/5 I would give this more than 5 if I could. That's how much this show means to me.

4. I TOLD SUNSET ABOUT YOU/ TRANSLATE MY LOVE WITH YOUR HEART

Genre/Themes: Romance, Melodrama, Coming of Age, Angst, Drama, Childhood friendship

Country: Thailand

Verdict: Wow. All I can say is wow. I find my self not able to talk about this show, because like what else can I say that everyone hasn't said. It's outstanding. No words. I think this show was just out of nowhere, I mean probably not; because it was a Nadao production but still, for a BL? Out of nowhere. The effort, the acting, the music, the production, the themes and the way it was all so perfectly told? It was a journey, I ended up at times also on the floor sobbing, shouting and just like feeling so single. Haha. But really this show is ridiculously good, it's like something that can't be fully explained, it's still a shock to me (and I really need to start believing in potentials of BLs more), it is, I'm just thankful I guess, for the 5 hours spent with this show, the number of essays derived from this show, the way Teh and Oh snuck in my heart and refused to leave. I think we all want a love like Teh and Oh, someone who completely takes your breath away, is selfless for you and is your number one supporter and fan. Someone who the room spins around for and your world only focuses on, someone who makes you brave.

And I think Teh and Oh found that with each other, and it was beautiful to witness, it was heartbreaking as well to see them struggle with it, it was also peaceful to reach the end and see them safe and secure with each other. ITSAY was everything, it also means a lot to me because the writing and directing are effortless, it's inspiring and beautiful to see how it came about, its so fulfilling to see how much effort went into this production. And I can't wait to see how Part 2 unfolds next year. I will say that with all the angst and longing, the ending did feel unsatisfactory because I just felt that all the tension and emotion invested just became really tame at the end, all the angst just fell apart so rapidly, and it felt weird that it ended in a hug? But with all the theories about sad endings and the other directions the writer could have gone with I'm happy it was a happy ending, and I'm delighted our boys reunited and became each other's most immense success/happiness.

Ratings: 4.5/5 Yeh I want to give it a 5/5 but the ending like I said felt a little bit empty for me, I didn't feel satisfied or like complete but that's because there's a part 2 coming. Still is the best Thai BL ever created. And it deserves all the praise.

November was a ride, I think I've cried so much during these past weeks, but honestly, I'm so glad BLs are just improving and putting more effort in, BLs are no longer just for fujoshis to consume. Still, now they represent and educate about LGBTQ+ experiences, they feel relatable and understandable. They're not as toxic as before. We're getting healthier relationships, we're getting depth and unique plots, we're getting happy endings as well. It's very lovely to see the growth, and I can't wait to see what December brings or next year. I'm just so proud of these actors, I'm proud of actors who actually respect this genre and understands why people like it, for me I really enjoy learning about things I never thought or experienced, it humbles me, and it inspires me so much. I'm grateful for these shows. Hopefully, there's many more like ITSAY and GSP to come. Please.

#thai bl #bl drama #bl series #itsay #i told sunset about you #gaya sa pelikula #gsp #like in the movies #wrpup #november #my gear and your gown #mgayg #a chance to love #love by chance #lbc #tincan #tulhin #mark siwat #pinoy bl

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pomegranates-and-blood · 5 years ago

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Vænn (Ivar’s PoV)

νοσταλγία Masterlist

Vænn: beautiful, hopeful, promising (Old Norse)

Pairing: Ivar/Reader

Summary: Another attempt at writing snippets of Ivar’s PoV of νοσταλγία, this time this relates to chapters 11-12 of the main story, approximately.

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: The usual

A/N:Today I was supposed to upload Sieghild’s PoV, and Ivar’s was supposed to be on December 1st but hey, I got it done beforehand so here you go.

I’ve been absolutely hating my writing lately, so I am really sorry if this sucks, I don’t know what else to say other than that. Hopefully it isn’t as bad as my worse thoughts make me believe lol, thank you for reading.

Taglist: @youbloodymadgenius @heavenly1927 @toe-vind-ek-jou @xbellaxcarolinax @pieces-by-me @angelofthorr

You smile more freely now, he notices. Like you don’t resent the smiles that curve your lips, like you’ve started to realize he isn’t chaining you.

He watches you study a plum you’ve only taken one small and delicate bite off of, as you muse to yourself and, apparently, to him,

“Back home they made wines with these. With many things, actually. Dandelions, cherries,” Your words die with a small chuckle that shakes your shoulders, and you pause to take another small bite of the fruit. “My favorite is roses.”

Ivar only hums a response, because he doesn’t exactly know what to say to that. He was never the best at…talking, at this apparently easy familiarity; and while lately you do seem to be willing and able to strike a conversation about anything and nothing, Ivar will admit he doesn’t know how to deal with that, so he mostly chooses to stay silent and listen to you talk.

Which you do. A lot. He has a feeling you think you talk and share a lot less than you actually do.

But you give a lot away. He may not be good at talking and charming like Hvitserk or Sigurd, or approachable and easy to confide in like Ubbe; but he is good at watching people.

He watches you, and notices you flinch when a fire is breathed too much life, takes note of the way your eyes soften when he says your name, and is delighted to see your smile is colder when it is directed at someone that isn’t him.

And you also talk a lot. Which he doesn’t mind, the Gods know he doesn’t mind. The sound of your voice seems to be perpetually stuck in his head, and although the arrogant and insufferable little tone you get when you think you are right is infuriating, it is much preferable to when he didn’t know the sound of your voice at all, or the little drag of your accent when you speak his language, or the fluidity of when you speak in yours.

“Oh, and pomegranate wine!” You continue, licking a drop of juice from the side of your wrist up, and his eyes follow the movement. You lift big eyes to him as if you don’t realize how much he wants to trap that small wrist in his own hand and lick any offending drops himself. “You don’t have pomegranates here, do you?”

“Would you want some?”

But you shake your head almost immediately, “No, no, I can’t eat them. It’s…the fruit of the temptation, Hiereiai cannot eat the seeds of it.”

He remembers almost all your tales of the Gods you worship, and the six pomegranate seeds that made a Goddess remain in another realm for half eternity has always stayed with him. Maybe because of how it is one of the tales you don’t think much about before speaking of it, you don’t pick and choose at what to say when you speak of her.

And Ivar wonders to himself, if six seeds of this fruit could make a Goddess be bound to that Underworld; what they could do to a mortal woman, a woman that, like the Goddess you speak of, isn’t allowed to eat them.

The errant thought of telling his brother to arrange for some merchant to find him pomegranates stays for a few moments too long on his head.

Because he wasn’t lying, before, when he told you that he could give you anything you wanted. He would, even if admitting it is giving away control, and even worse, giving it to you, power for you to hold over him; he would.

It doesn’t matter, he supposes. You’ll be his wife soon, he’ll have as much power over you as you have over him.

It will be even, then. You will be equals. That has to be what you wanted, even if you still refuse to accept the idea of marrying him.

You didn’t leave him any choice, after all. If he was the one with power, you’d be cold and look at him with hate in your eyes; but Ivar knows if he let you have power without keeping some for himself, you’d run back to your burnt city, you’d leave him.

Ivar knows sooner or later you’ll come to accept it. He knows it, and he knows you should want at least the title of queen if not that of wife. Because even if he didn’t know who you were, if he chose to ignore it like he did in those first days in the run-down village near Dublin, he would know you were made to rule, to command. It’s written in the way you walk, in the way you talk and hold your head high, in that insufferable arrogance, in that stubbornness.

____

There’s something strange about you when you say your goodnight after the announcement of your marriage is brought up before his brothers, but Ivar decides not to dwell on it. And, as he leaves the dim room where he introduced you to his older brother and announced you are to be his wife, he sees Ubbe waiting by a wall, arms crossed over his chest as he stares Ivar down.

“She’s beautiful,” Ubbe comments as he steps away from the wall, “Doesn’t mean she will make a good wife.”

“I’m not marrying her because of beauty, brother.”

He’s marrying you because he has to keep you with him, because he knows now just as he knew when he first saw you in that field, that you were sent by the Gods, by Freyja, to be at his side. The Gods called you to cross many seas, to travel across half a world, and he knows it was because you and him are Fated to meet, to know each other.

And he knows that slave was right, when she spoke of how it all leads to pain and suffering and so it is a proof of the Gods’ favor when people are chosen to suffer. She said those who endure are rewarded, he still remembers her quiet voice uttering the words, but he hadn’t believed her, not at first.

But now, and ever since he first saw that mirage in the red dress with gentle caresses and loving words turn around with a war cry and the fierceness of a Valkyrie, he knows that slave was right, and the Gods do reward those who endure. And one way or another, for a purpose he wishes he knew but doesn’t yet, you were sent to him as the Gods’ gift for enduring a life of pain and suffering; he knows this.

“What are you marrying her for then, Ivar?”

“Why do you care?”

“Because-…brother, you could do this the…the normal way. Find a woman you care for, a woman that wants to be your wife, not some captured witch that fears you.”

He wanted to interrupt him, tell him he has never had a chance to do things the normal way, because while Ubbe may try to tell him he is just like his brothers, he isn’t. And Ragnar was right, he had to accept that he isn’t a normal man, and that means he can’t do things the normal way, like normal men do.

Instead of bringing up a conversation that will make his brother look at him with that pathetic compassion, that brotherly pity, in his eyes; he clarifies,

“She doesn’t fear me. She fears you.”

The other man doesn’t relent, and when Ubbe steps forward, trying to make him understand, “And why do you think that is? I see what she’s trying to do, I see clearly. She’s bewitched you!”

He rolls his eyes with an exaggerated movement of his head, and meets the eyes of his older brother with what is sure to be the deadpan tiredness of hearing so many times about women being able to bewitch the men in his family.

The only woman he has seen use her cunt or her lips to actually gain power is Margrethe, but no, no one thinks she might have bewitched any of his useless brothers. Or cursed him, Ivar has toyed with that idea many times since that damn night when he tried fucking her.

But it is stupid to think a woman would bewitch his father, or him. He may be a cripple, but he’s not an idiot; he would know if you were trying to fool him, if you were trying to play with his head. He thought you were, at first, before he knew you and your mouth that betrays your truths before you can stop it, and your eyes that give away every softness and every fury.

He knows he would have been able to tell if you tried tricking him.

Mainly because you wouldn’t be this infuriating brat if you actually tried getting something you wanted from him, he gathers.

Ubbe just looks at him with the pressed lips and disappointed eyes of a brother that tries acting like a father, before turning his back and walking away.

____

Your surprise him by appearing in his rooms, but before he can fully form a question as to why you are here, you reach up with shaking hands to your shoulders

Your dress drops to the floor and you stand before him, bare and beautiful and his, his to admire, to touch, to…

But you talk, because you talk a lot, you talk a lot more than you realize. And you speak of how you’re willing to offer your body to him if only to avoid becoming his wife, of how he doesn’t have to do this.

And it is once again like sitting in front of a slave that trembles before him, that kisses him at his brother’s request, that barely masks her disgust when she is forced to touch him.

“Get dressed.”

You cover yourself, and soften your voice but not the way he wants you to. Because now you sound scared, helpless, desperate. And you plead for a way to avoid becoming his wife, for an easy path to escape him.

And he wants to punish you, he wants to make you regret ever thinking you can toy with him, he wants…he wants to make you admit it. He wants to make you shed that…that softness of yours, he wants to…

He doesn’t know what he wants.

He thinks a part of him actually wants you to hurt him, to be cruel. To just…prove him right, prove to him that he can’t have that warm familiarity of having you share your day with him, that fascinating enjoyment of being taught your tongue, those smiles that he earns more and more easily as time goes by.

A part of him wants you to prove him right, and to be cruel and a lie. A chimera, a vision, like he thought you were when he first saw you on that battlefield.

It would certainly make things easier, if he could let go of the childish and pathetic hope of having something normal, like a wife that does not despise him, a woman that actually wants him.

But things aren’t easy, so he just spews venom and barely-hidden insecurities in the form of accusations, and prays your own arrogance and your own temper keeps you from seeing how with nothing but you, you can have him at your mercy.

____

So yeah, there you go. I know it’s not much, only 2k, but I struggle a lot when writing Ivar’s PoV. I sincerely hope you didn’t hate it, thank you for reading and I’m sorry if it sucks.

Best of wishes! <3 <3

#ivar the boneless x reader #ivar x reader #ivar the boneless imagine #ivar the boneless #vikings #νοσταλγία masterlist

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talas-starlight · 5 years ago

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Scarred Spirits - Zuko x fem! reader (pt.5)

SUMMARY: y/n wakes up in an unfamiliar place and tries to find her way back to her mission (i suck at summaries LOL)

WORD COUNT: 2.3k

WARNINGS: swearing, fighting? kinda?

OTHER PARTS: pt1 / pt2 / pt3 / pt4 / pt6

MASTERLIST: Here!

A/N: anddddd we’re back!!! hehe thank you to everyone who has been so so patient with me i am so greatful && hopefully youre just as excited as i am for this series heheh

Bricks. You felt as though you were just hit with a tonne of bricks. The idea of even opening your eyes to the harsh sunlight, which you could feel through your eyelids felt like the worst idea in the world. Your dry throat didn’t help at all either. Maybe if I just lay wherever the fuck I am, I’ll magically gain the energy to move again. Or better yet, maybe the ground will swallow me whole, and I can forget about this mission altogether.

Abruptly interrupting your painful stillness on the ground, there was a small kick into your left side. The sudden shock immediately sent your brain swirling into all the ways you could eliminate whoever disturbed your peace.

“Hey… I think she’s dead.”

Ah, the wonderful sound of an annoying, teenage boy. They’ll be easy to take out.

A second female voice emerged. “She's not dead Sokka! She's literally breathing!" Sokka? As in Hakodas son? Oh Spirits, you never fail to amaze me with how you choose to dictate my life. Hmmm, then that means the girl is Katara. Yay.

"Yeah?! Then why the hell hasn't she even moved a single inch since we found her!"

"Well, maybe she's protesting against your annoying poking!" Spirits they're annoying and loud.

A third voice attempted to intervene, "Guys…. Stop, she's fine. Trust me." Hmm, that's considerably younger. 10 years old perhaps? Or a bit older? 12 maybe? Male?

"Oh yeah? How can you be so sure Aang."

"Well Katara is right, she is breathing for one. But…. There's something else about her, I can feel it."

"What? Like an avatar thingy?"

"Yeah."

Wait the Avatar? Wasn't he on that dragon from when I was-

"Hmmm right, well what are we going to do with her?" At that statement, the annoying boy who seemed to be so confident that you were dead, kicked you again. Sick of his irritable presence, with as much strength you could muster, you took your right hand quickly snatching his ankle, and yanking it towards you, causing him to lose balance and ultimately backwards. Letting out a high-pitched yelp as he thudded onto the hard ground, you quickly rose to your knees. Taking the hand gripped around his ankle to tug him closer to you, you moved between his legs until you were able to straddle his waist, placing all of your weight on top of him. Finally, you grabbed both his arms, holding them above his head, completely hindering him from moving.

"If you kick me one more time, or even trying anything like that again, I WILL chop your legs off. Got it?"

Staring at you with pure horror in his eyes, he visibly gulped, nodding. "Yes! Yes! Hear it loud and clear. Totally got it! Just call me Sokka, the guy with perfect understanding."

Moving your right hand from his wrists, you firmly gripped his jaw, forcing him to keep eye contact with you. Taking in his scared features, you smirked even though he couldn't see it. "You sure about that, water boy?"

"YES! YES!", frantically nodding, you could tell that if you kept pressing on, he'd probably burst into tears soon. Bringing his voice down to a pathetic whimper, he let out, "please don't hurt me."

Finally lifting yourself off him, you let out a dry laugh, satisfied with his compliance. "Uh-huh. Right."

Turning your head to the people that belonged to the other two voices, you took in their stunned and weakly defensive stances. Chest heaving at your sudden physical movements, you nodded, acknowledging them. "Hey, Avatar. Katara. So, where am I?"

After a few moments of silence, the Avatar spoke up first. “You’re just outside of Omashu.”

Katara elbowed Aang, instantly alarmed at his calm nature towards you. “Aang! You can’t just say that. We don’t know who this person is or how she even knows my name! She could be with the Fire Nation for all we know!”

“Katara it’s alright! Calm down.”

“Calm down?! She just attacked Sokka! I mean, rightfully so- but it’s a little suspicious. We don’t know who she is or her intentions.”

Sighing, you looked around, taking in your surroundings. It seemed that rocky mountains surrounded you with a small group of tents in the distance. Interesting… why are they all Earth Kingdom people, when Omashu is so close by?

Shifting your attention back towards the three, you decided against telling them who you were. “It doesn’t matter how I know any of your names. What matters is that I need to get back to my original mission.”

Sokka scoffed, moving to stand beside his sister. “Your mission? Let me guess; you’re here to kill Aang too.”

Raising an eyebrow, his eyes immediately widened in fear. “Trust me, water boy, if I wanted him dead, we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now. I’m here on… other confidential business.” Met with silence from all three of them you moved on, “so let me guess, you found Omashu invaded by the Fire Nation, and you three were the ones that helped that tiny camp of people over there escape from their rule. Interesting choice considering there are bigger things you should be worrying about. Yet, why are all of you still here? Surely the Avatar and his friends don’t need to train them in how to look after themselves.”

“We’re going back into Omashu. To make a trade for King Bumi and to give the governor his son back.” Why does he keep willingly give me information? Now that’s interesting. I can barely feel any fire within him either, it’s almost as if it's not there at all…

“Okay. I’ll accompany you all into Omashu, and once we arrive within the city, we’ll go our separate ways.”

“Sure!”

“NO!”

Bursting out into a fit of laughter, you shook your head at the water tribe siblings. “Naw, it’s sweet how you think you all have a choice in this. Don’t worry, nothing will happen to any of you, I’m just hitching a ride and you’ll never have to see me again. Regardless, Aang said yes, and considering he’s the Avatar and all, I think his choice overrules yours.”

Katara didn’t seem to like your suggestion that her and Sokka’s opinion didn’t matter. “No, it doesn’t work like that! We’re a family, and we make these decisions together! You can’t just wake up after who knows how long you were laying there for, and expect us to trust you immediately! For one, you attacked Sokka a little too easily without any bending, and you literally said that you were on a mission! If I’m honest, you sound like trouble, especially since we don’t even know your name! Or what you even look like!”

“Just as I said before, it doesn’t matter. It’s sweet you all care enough about each other’s safety, but I’m not here to cause any of you ‘trouble’. Get me inside Omashu, and we’ll never have to speak or interact ever again. If it means so much to you, I’ll let water boy tie me up, and watch me the entire journey there as reparations for my small attack against him. How does that sound?”

Aang more than satisfied with your offer let out a quick, “Yes!”.

Grumbling under her breath Katara shook her head, clearly understanding that this was as good as it was going it get. “Fine. But he ties you up now. If I see you even move an inch out of line, don’t think I’ll go easy on you. I am a waterbender after all.”

As if you being a waterbender would have stopped me. Holding your arms out and casting your attention towards the ground, you were ready for Sokka to bind your wrists together with some cloth, he tore off his clothing. Unknown to you, he seemed to notice that despite how tough you were, you were weak. All of the sudden movements and the argument with his sister clearly drained you physically.

“Hey… I don’t really like you since you threatened to kill me, but are you sure you’re ready to be travelling so soon? You’re breathing really heavily. You need some water and food.” Gently wrapping your wrists together, he tried and failed to make eye contact with you.

At the mention of water, you throat physically constricted in pain. “Nah, I’ll be alright. Just need to get to Omashu.”

“Doubt it. Let’s get you on Appa and I’ll nag Katara for something.”

Silently following him to the Sky Bison, you were grateful that your mask covered the wide smile that broke out onto your face. It’s beautiful.

Finally, parting ways with them, you let out a breath of relief. That was the most silent journey I have ever been on and I travel by myself… Spirits, I hope I never have to run into them again. I think I’m going to lose my mind if I ever do. What was Hakoda thinking?! I’d be an awful big sister to them, they already hate me! It didn’t help how much they kept bickering either. Argh, what a mess. Aang kept looking at me funny the entire time too! What was up with that? Do his Avatar powers allow him to see into my soul or something? Spirits, he’d probably wants to unleash his Avatar state on me for all of the lives I’ve taken. Yikes.

Before setting off to find Azula, you needed to take precautions to blend into the small kingdom. Stealing some clothes, you found you chose to duplicate you last disguise with the only main difference being that it was in green cloth instead of pink.

After securing your final blade underneath your robes, you knew there was no more time to waste and you needed to find Azula quick. You weren’t sure how much she has progressed in her mission to find Iroh and Zuko and the guilt of not helping them when they ran off the Fire Nation ship was already nagging you like an itch you couldn’t scratch.

This city is too big to wander around aimlessly.

Closing your eyes and letting out a deep breath, you chose to look for her the quickest way you knew how. By sensing her fire.

Come on y/n; you can do it. Unsure of how far your abilities would work, you grew worried that she may be too far away for you to even feel her.

After a few minutes, you started to feel irritated. Of course, you could sense fire, you felt so much of it. The city was crawling with Fire Nation after all, but it wasn’t hers. You emitted a few more deep breaths, trying to clear your head.

Suddenly a deep, familiar voice entered your mind. Inner peace. You need to find your inner peace y/n. That’s why you keep losing control; you need to find it.

Is this that dragon again? As if you didn’t have a random voice inside your head, you were met with silence.

Look you can’t just randomly enter my mind you know, and who in Spirits name transports me to some random mountainside?! I don’t know who you are, but I’ve been doing fine all of these years on my own. So kindly, get out of my head.

Letting out a small scream into your hands as the voice never came back, you closed your eyes again.

Stupid voice.

Stupid inner peace.

Breathing in and out, you wracked your brain for something that made you feel at peace. Come on, you can do it. Then after a few moments, it hit you. Not your inner peace, no. You’d have to find that another day. What did hit you was Azula’s fire, you felt it.

Immediately following the tugging feeling, you ran as fast as you could until you came to a tall piece of scaffolding. Even though you were so far below, you could still hear the fight that was occurring many levels up. Can’t she keep herself out of a battle for at least a day?! I bet it’s not even Zuko up there. Scowling, knowing that you can’t ignore her completely, you climbed up until you reached the fight but still remaining hidden.

By the time you reached the platform, you felt that Azula had already moved from this part of the fight. That didn’t mean that there weren’t pressing matters right in front of you, though.

“How are you going to fight without your bending?” A Fire Nation girl before you brought out her blades ready to attack Katara. Holding back a verbal groan, you knew you were going to have to help her.

Quickly jumping in, you deflect Mai’s knife with your arm while simultaneously catching a boomerang that you spotted in the corner of your eye. As the flying bison approached your quickly dodged its tail as it sent the two fire nation girls flying back. Seeing a distraction between all parties, you threw the boomerang back to Sokka while running for the scaffolding, making your way into the shadows. So much for never having to see them again.

When you ran away from the scene, you knew your disguise was too recognisable considering the two girls saw you when you intervened. This left you to painstakingly have to find a new set of clothes, just to make babysitting Azula and her friends so much easier. Despite finally being back on track with your mission, it didn’t make it any less tedious as you followed from a distance in the shadows. “So, we’re tracking down your brother and uncle, huh?”

“It’ll be interesting seeing Zuko again, won’t it Mai?” Huh? Is that coal brains girlfriend or something?

Azula spoke up at that comment, “It’s not just Zuko and Iroh anymore. We have a third target now.” You have got to be fucking joking. I guess I better start finding my inner peace after all, you know, so I don’t blow her FUCKING BRAINS OUT!

a/n: hehe thank you so much for reading!!! what did you think?? hehe i know its been a while so im kinda rusty so pls let me know your thoughts or any feedback!! hehe i know this wasnt that juicy and kinda short but ive got a lot planned so dw hehe we’ll get there ;)

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