#i THINK i hadnt uploaded any of these yet

[ribbononline]

you guys know what time it is by now

[junicai]

NCT being whipped for miyazu aria for seven minutes ;

325,078 views • 07 Feb 2021 • uploaded by [haechanieski]

[ NCT 127 Takes a Friendship Test ; Glamour 2020 ]

offscreen: “So, what was your first impression of Aria?” 

Aria pressed herself into Doyoung’s side briefly, muttering a translation of the question into his ear. They had been briefed on the questions beforehand anyway, but she wanted to make sure he understood before he began answering - just in case he had forgotten.

Doyoung tilted his head down to Aria, a mischievous grin making its way onto his face; and it was only then, that Aria remembered exactly how the two had met in the first place. 

Aria started to flush, shaking her head rapidly and burying her face into her hands. “Oh god no,” she whined. 

Doyoung laughed at her, pulling her into his side with an arm over her shoulder and holding her there while he began speaking. 

“Ah, Aria? We met for the first time when Aria was still tiny - well, tinier,” 

“Hey!” 

“And,” Doyoung continued on, laughing, “I had left my jacket in one of the practice rooms. It was a gift from my hyung, so I had gone back to get it even though it was really late. But when I went in to get it, I found Aria, sitting on the floor in the dark with it over her lap instead.” 

At this point, Aria had fully buried her face into Doyoung’s chest, in a futile attempt to hide her reddened cheeks. “I thought it belonged to one of my friends,” she weakly protested, embarrassed by the laughs of the staff members behind the camera. “You scared me when you came in!” 

“You stole my jacket!” 

Aria sent a withering look to the camera. 

“Czennie. Doyoung-oppa doesn’t care if I freeze, I want you to remember this.”

Doyoung gaped at her, yanking her back into his arms with an offended gasp, “Yah, you brat that’s a lie.”

Aria began sliding to the floor, letting her arms go boneless and limp. “You don’t love me!”

Doyoung started to stop with her, trying to hold her up in his arms. “Aria, Aria don’t sit on the floor it’s dirty, get up-”

The music of the other idol groups played quietly through the green room’s speakers, a small television setup in the upper right hand corner allowing the idols inside to monitor the performances outside. 

Renjun tossed a half full water bottle over to Jisung, who was sitting on the floor beside the sofa where Jaemin, Jeno and Aria were; all three of them looking elated yet exhausted. 

Ridin’ was a choreography heavy dance, and although Aria hadn’t many lines in this particular song, she was still struggling to push through the residual pain in her lower back. She had strained it earlier on in the month, pushing herself too far with too little preparation during rehearsals and was paying the price for it.

Most of Aria’s time in the greenroom before their performance was spent ensuring the other boys that yes, she was ok to perform and no, she wasn’t going to sit this one out.

The boys begrudgingly accepted her protests; but that hadnt stopped Jeno ever-so-carefully tugging her onto the sofa once they returned to the greenroom post-performance, gently pushing her to lie her head down on Jaemin’s lap and bringing her legs up into Jeno’s. 

Jisung had wandered over later, eyes stuck to his phone screen but he willingly sacrificed his left hand to hold onto Aria’s when she hissed at the knot Jeno was trying to knead out of her lower back.

Jaemin shushed her softly, running a hand through her hair and untangling strands with his fingers. When Aria’s eyes had clenched shut and a whimper broke out from between her lips, Jeno’s hands froze in their movements, instantly bending closer to whisper apologizes.

“No, no it’s okay,” Aria said, attempting to prop herself up. 

Jaemin pressed her back down, her head staying in his lap. “Stop it, let Nono help.”

She knew that there was something more to say, but having awknowledged that their current circumstances were not the best to have such a discussion, he settled for carding a hand through her hair again. 

Aria let her eyes drift closed, hand still curled in Jisung’s, and legs pillowed in Jeno’s lap. 

Who’s name do you think matches their appearance? 

Kun pressed his lips together, thinking. 

“Hm, all of the members put a lot of thought into their stage names, so they all fit very well,” he hummed, eyes flickering between the paper and the camera. 

He took in a breath, clearly torn. 

“Ah!” he exclaimed, looking up to the camera. “Aria, her name fits her really well; Akari is such a beautiful name and it compliments her personality perfectly. She’s really like a fruit sometimes - she’s always cheerful and energetic, like she’s on a constant sugar rush. Very sweet.” the smile that overtook Kun’s features was nothing sort of soft. 

He quickly scribbled down Aria’s name in Hangul, before rolling the pen into the middle of his palm and straightening up again.

“Yiyang, is her Chinese name - she asked me to give her one last year. And you shouldn’t listen to Winwin, her full name is Qian Qiuyue, ok?”

Kun was laughing at himself now, picking back up the pen and moving to read the next question.

a/n: i know mr qian kun did NOT just say aria was fruity. 

aria nct lgbt sub-unit confirmed

Renjun was sat beside Aria on a single piano stool, shoulders pressed together as she leaned forwards to try and make sense of the notes written on the pages in front of her. 

“You know the basics, right?” Renjun questioned, hand coming out to flip forward in the music book a few pages. The single crotchet notes quickly turned into more complex rhythms, and from the side of his vision he could see Aria paling slightly.

He turned his head to look at her, “Riri, c’mon I know you know more than Mary had a Little Lamb, you can’t stay at beginner level forever.”

“Yes I can.” Aria sulked. 

Renjun sighed. “You were the one who asked me to teach you.” 

“Yes! When I thought it would be easier than this, my fingers just don’t do what they’re meant to do!”

“That’s why I’m here!” Renjun cut off her tirade. “I’m not going to laugh at you if you make mistakes - you’re learning, and everyone makes mistakes when they’re learning.”

“Promise?”

He ruffled her hair slightly, “Promise. Now here, look, this one isn’t difficult you’ll manage this one fine.”

“Injunnie.”

“Mm?”

“-nevermind, okay just. How do I?”

Renjun lifted his hands onto the keys of the piano, showing her the placement of her fingers and getting her to copy him. Aria did so, and then he was running her slowly, step-by-step through the first few bars of the piece, catching her when she played dud notes and clapping softly when she played through without stuttering. 

Soon enough, Aria was playing a simplistic but solid melody line with her right hand, basic accompanying chords with her left, and Renjun was staring at the side of her face; head tilted slightly to the left and a small, barely-there proud glint in his eye. 

 [BUBBLE UPDATE 210205 ]

ARIA~~

czennie

i heard about the tiny horse

do u think they’d let me get one

if i asked nicely??

“Jae, Jae! Jaehyun!” Aria coughed out the older boy’s name, throwing a glare over her shoulder. “If you insist on leaning your entire bodyweight on me, please don’t throttle me in the process.”

The man only sent a weak apologetic grin her way before his feet slid out from underneath him and he was left grappling at the small girl yet again. 

“You know when you said you wanted me to teach you ice-skating I didn’t know this was how you were planning on murdering me. If I have to die, I’d rather go out with a bang - ya’know? Not death by groupmate, that’s borinG-” Aria’s voice wobbled as she was pulled yet again. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Jaehyun apologized, going so far as to take his hands off her shoulders. “I think I’ve got it now.”

He made it another few steps forward before he was tossed off balance by an eight year old boy rushing past, startling him to the point of jumping backwards.

When Jaehyun’s legs went from underneath him, he flailed his arms in a futile attempt to regain his balance - one of the windmilling arms catching Aria’s extended hands in the process. 

Aria let out a shriek as her skates went as well, tumbling backwards. Her head would have made a harsh impact onto the ice - no arms ready to catch her fall - if it wasn’t for Jaehyun’s hand catching the back of her neck and taking the brunt of the impact. 

Lying on the ground, Jaehyun coughed out a laugh, Aria staring him down. 

All too soon though, Aria joined him in the laughter, head still pillowed on Jaehyun’s arm and the pair of them still lying on their backs on the ice.

“Hello everyone, today I’m with my favourite baby, say hi baby!”

Ten’s grin was audible in his words as he spoke to Aria, who waved before opening her mouth. “Your favourite baby?” 

Ten cooed, “Yes, my favourite baby,” while crossing the floor of the practice room to throw his arms around Aria. 

He rocked her side to side, pressing kisses to the top of her head. 

“And what makes me your favourite? You know Yangie won’t be pleased if he hears he’s been replaced,” Aria lifted her head to look up at Ten. 

“You accept the title of my baby, and are therefore my favourite. You don’t fight my love.” Ten shakes her dramatically side to side, mourning the one-sided relationship. 

Aria only patted his head in solace. “It’s ok. If it’s any consolation the only reason I don’t fight your hugs is because you’re faster than I am.”

Ten let out a pained gasp. “Betrayed by both my babies. How ever will I survive!”

Aria tried to pry his arms away from her shoulders that were shaking with barely-suppressed laughter, worming her way out from his embrace. Ten only tightened his hold, going limp and dragging her onto the floor.

“No...” Ten cried, “I’m dying...”

Aria’s laughter turned to shrieks when he began to tickle her stomach on the skin that was showing from where her t-shirt had lifted up from the movement. 

“No no no no stop Ten, TEN stop I’m sorry I take it back I take it baaack-” 

“Say it!” Ten demanded, unrelenting. 

“I’m your baby! I’m your baby I’m sorry I’m sorry!” Aria was rolling away from his hands, trying to escape but Ten only turned to lie flat on top of her. 

“Exactly.”

a/n: nct world 2.0 gave us so much content of the boys loving aria im :’( smth in the water made aria super cuddly this time around i think she’s after all of their hearts 

- aria collecting nct members like pokemon cards

Immediately after Jungwoo’s defeat, Aria sidestepped to behind Lucas where she fisted her hands in his shirt. 

“Aria! You’re next!” The presenter called out, and soon all the members in OFN has turned to face her. 

She poked her head around to see Yuta standing at the arm wrestling table already, tongue between teeth and grinning at her partially hidden form. 

Aria squeaked and ducked back behind Lucas. “Noo,” she moaned, already knowing what was going to happen.

To their credit, Johnny and Jungwoo tried their best to bolster her spirits before she emerged, but Aria still shuffled up to the table with her head tucked down, paying no attention to the calls of support from the boys behind her. 

Yuta rolled his sweater sleeve up again, and Aria looked up to meet his eyes.

“Onii-chan~” she tried, biting her lip to stop the laughter from bursting out. 

Yuta brought a hand up to his mouth before turning away, eyes wide. Aria could hear the cheers of cute! from her teammates behind her; Yuta’s teammates doing their level best to convince him not to cave under Aria’s widened eyes. 

“Onii-chan, you know I’m not very strong,” Aria made sure to heighten her voice’s register a bit, and stuck out her bottom lip, “Can you go easy on me?” 

Aria could hear Mark calling out to Yuta to not fall for it.

“Yah!” Aria dropped her voice back to her normal register, yelling out to Mark. “Stop it this is all I have!” 

The laughter was heard from across the field from the members in the tents, and Aria was left to sadly shuffle her way closer to the table and interlink her hand with Yuta’s. 

He sent her a consoling smile, the referee blew the whistle and then Aria was pushing with all her might against Yuta. Her legs came up like Renjun’s did, face scrunched up with the effort before the back of her hand met the plastic-covered table and Yuta was announced the victor. 

He quickly made his way around the table, wrapping Aria in a hug and picking her up to spin her around. Aria only giggled at him, sticking her tongue out at Ten who called Yuta out for fraternizing with the enemy.

Aria knew that a springboard worked off of your downward momentum, so it seemed perfectly logical to assume that if she barreled her bodyweight into the jump, then she would make it high enough to get over the 200cm vault. 

She’d made it over the previous heights with varying degrees of success, but the new towering height was throwing her off a bit. Cheers came from both her teammates sitting down beside the mat as well as the other members sitting in the shade. 

“Aria! Challenge accepted!” she called out, pumping her fist into the air. 

From the corner of her eye, Aria could see Johnny leaning forward with his hands on his knees, watching carefully as she ran up to the springboard. Lucas was in a similar position, was it not for the wide grin he sported.

Beginning her run she tried to use up as much speed as possible, sprinting to the vault before jumping with her feet together onto the springboard and allowing it to propel her up and over the vault.

However what she had failed to account for; was the length of her arms. 

Aria made it over the 190cm vault, but her fingertips barely scraped the top and it left her with a choice of either trying to become Superman and face-planting into the mat on the other side, or bringing her legs together prematurely and hope she didn’t lose a leg. 

She couldn’t hear the gasps that left everyone’s mouth once her hands missed the top of the vault, missing the way Lucas moved closer to the mat with a jerk forward. 

Bringing her legs closed, Aria swung her bodyweight forward and grappled behind her for the vault in a panic. A yelp left her mouth as her hand caught on the rung and she tucked it back into her body when her feet met the edge of the mat.

Unstable, Aria toppled backwards with her hands stretching out behind her again to prevent herself from falling. Her back landed against the vault, and she knocked it over, falling on top of the now-split pieces. 

Despite it all, Aria was laughing hysterically, hands coming up to cover her face as she tried to hide her flaming red cheeks. An arm extended to her and she hoisted herself out of the middle of the vault, soon coming to rub at her back.

“Does that count?” Aria could hear the presenters asking should she be disqualified for knocking over the vault even after landing, but she was more concentrated on the hand on her back that was guiding her to her other teammates, all clapping wilding and cheering. 

“You okay?” Lucas’ voice came in her ear, laughter but also concern audible in his tone. His hand was still rubbing slowly along her back, soothing the reddened skin underneath the t-shirt she was wearing. 

“Yeah I’m fine,” Aria let her head fall forwards as she laughed at the thought of the picture she must have looked, flailing as she barely made it over the vault. “I don’t know if I’ll make it over the next one though.”

“Ah it’s okay. I’ll knock it over too and then I can join you.”

The gate at the back end of the tunnel swung closed with a clang, everyone inside letting out a shout. 

Aria, having been standing in front of Johnny, tucked inside his coat while he back hugged her (she wasn’t built for the cold weather, and the denim jacket she wore was doing nothing to save her from hypothermia) let out a yelp and turned her face into Johnny’s chest.

Johnny pushed her behind him slightly as he turned around to look what had happened, and Aria clung to his waist while the others around them furrowed their eyebrows in confusion. 

Trapped?

a/n: and a bonus clip bc shes was so CUTE during mtopia i couldnt not 

In the emptied dining room, the SuperM members scattered around the different table set ups, searching for the coloured pieces of paper. Taeyong had wandered over to the food counter, while Ten had migrated towards the opposite end of the hall.

Baekhyun could see the other members in various locations; all apart from one. 

“Oh? Aria, where did you go?” 

The youngest member was no where to be found, and Baekhyun’s question gathered the attention of Taemin and Mark who were standing nearby. Mark tilted his head in a question, eyebrows lifted and then furrowed when he too looked around for the girl and couldn’t find her.

“I’m here!”

Baekhyun let out a small scream, jumping back from the table he was standing beside.

Beneath the tablecloth poked out Aria’s head, a sheepish smile on her face when she realized she’d scared her leader. 

“I thought there might be some clues underneath, so I wanted to check.” she explained, slowly shuffling out from underneath the table. 

“Baekhyun hyung did she scare you?” Jongin teased, as Taemin cooed over the adorable picture Aria made as she straightened up and brushed off the dust from her skirt. 

Baekhyun floundered, spluttering “What? No! I don’t get scared.” 

He puffed out his chest theatrically.

“Sorry oppa, I didn’t mean to scare you~” Aria said through suppressed laughter, coming over to hug him around the waist.

Baekhyun deflated slighty, “Ah, it’s okay,” he grumbled, petting her hair. 

thank you for watching ! - haechanieski

[tender-rosiey]

hello !! I was wondering if I could make a request with dazai, where the reader runs a podcast that dazai really enjoys. He doesn't know what reader looks like, but recognizes her voice while he's out and about one day, and introduces himself, and as they get to know each other more start falling?

Idk if that makes any sense. Feel free to completely ignore this !! I love your writing sm by the way 🥺

❥ Euphony

ᴀ/ɴ: THIS IDEA IS SO CUTE SRSLY THANK YOU FOR THIS REQUEST ✨ I hope you like this and I am glad my writings please you! 🥺💘 also P/N stands for podcast name <3

“DAZAI STOP SLACKING OFF” scolded the blonde, however Dazai couldn’t bother to even lift his head. How could he when an angel is speaking into his ears?

His favorite podcast and most comforting one playing in his headphones.

(Podcast Name) is one he found 4 months ago; he truly enjoyed the melodic voice of the speaker, and what he liked was that she seemed to be genuinely enjoying talking about whatever topic she shared.

He would chuckle at her excitement as if he was taking to her, she reminded him of a kid in a candy store. Somehow a stranger he never met made his heart rest and be at peace and that baffled him; you don’t even know him yet you do this to him?

And sometimes the topics you talked about he was able to relate to and hearing you encourage those who are troubled by them made him happy, but somehow it’s like you are talking to him.

As if you know how he feels and knowing what exactly to say to silence those voices in his head that have been hunting him since he existed on this earth.

Listening for your podcast was baiscally a routine for him, his face would always light up at the sight of a new one being uploaded.

Your voice was an euphony that he wished to hear its symphony for eternity. A never ending melody that he wished to die with it being the last thing playing on his mind, other than the jarring sounds that he so loathed.

But the shame was that he didn’t know your face, what you looked like. However he was confident you were just as beautiful and majestic as your voice. Dazai became a man who hung onto your every word literally, but he knew this time it was alright for he wouldn’t be able to meet you.

He wouldn’t have to go through the trouble of loving and losing again.

But maybe fate has a different opinion?

As for one day he was strolling around the city, and was listening to the podcast that he ever so adores. For some reason he was thinking, is meeting you really impossible? You could still be in another country and who knows how far, but then again can it happen?

As if by default he had bumped into a person causing them both to stumble back with her on top.

“O-oh, sorry I wasn’t looking where I was going.”

...He knew that voice anywhere and everywhere, even between a million voices he still could be able to pick out yours. ‘That’s like searching for a needle in a haystack’ some would say but for him it was clear as day.

You stood up and helped in the way. ‘True embodiment of beauty, he thought then he popped up the question “Are you P/N?”

The question took you by surprise, someone recognized your voice? You smiled and nodded “The only one!”

And so the journey of the sea of love that you both drowned in started. You had exchanged numbers and would talk almost daily to each other, meeting up and having fun.

Both of you blinded by the presence of the other whenever you hung out together, as if you were the only two in sight.

Dazai realized he was falling for you, and it scared him to death. Everyone he loved always had come to a tragic ending and he would never want you to go through that.

To him distancing himself was the best option, so he tried. He tried but couldn’t. How is he supposed to get away from you when he got used to your presence and voice? How was he supposed to continue forgetting you both ever met when your name is carved all over his mind?

And so he realized, he was way too late to distance. He was head over heels for you, everything you did would make his heart flutter, butterflies bursting in his tummy at the sight of you, he was completely and utterly infatuated by every single thing about you.

Oh he was too long gone. Slowly falling deeper and harder until he couldn’t handle it, it wasn’t like Dazai to love without limits yet here you are being loved by his all being. But you didn’t know, and that pained him.

Did you even feel the same way? Perhaps you just saw him as another friend, maybe even a fan. Was he really going to risk your company for his own selfish desires?

Still it wouldn’t be Dazai if he hadnt noticed that your podcasts have been recently about love, could it be possible that you have been talking about him?

Was he really the man that captured your heart and made you a love-struck angel? He hoped so, and that’s why he was going to risk it. If it goes his way then finally life has chose to give him a slight ray of happiness and if it doesn’t then maybe love isnt for him.

“Hey, Y/N!” He chirped as he approached you with his hands behind his back. ‘Suspicious...’ you thought as the man settled in front of you with a smile. “I made something for you; I hope you like it.”

He handed you his phone and headphones, you wore them as he played what he planned to.

‘Y/N HIIIIIIII, hehe.’

That was his voice...

‘I know this is weird and stuff BUT HEAR ME OUT; I, Dazai Osamu, have fallen for you and everything about you’

You blinked and a pink hue decorated your cheeks.

‘You are a masterpiece, a Mona Lisa among others. A beautiful flower that bloomed and made everything around it mesmerizing. A sun that light up the way to a lot of lives, most importantly mine.’

‘You always helped me even before we met and that...that alone made me relieved and when I saw you face to face, I thought I was dreaming. Woah I am really infront of the angel of the euphony that calmed my heart?’

You covered your mouth as the recording continued.

‘I am sure you weren’t expecting this, but honestly I really did fall in love with you and I thought that confessing through a record, what made me know you, would be the best way to confess. Now take off the headphones and look me in the eye.’

And so you did and Dazai held your hand and with a hopeful smile “Will you be my symphony of love?”

[yes] - [no]

ALSO THANK YOU FOR 200 FOLLOWERS I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD MAKE IT THIS FAR! MY DEEPEST GRATITUDE FOR YOUR SUPPORT 🥺❤️

I PLAN ON MAKING A 200+ FOLLOWERS EVENT SOON SO STAY TUNED ❤️

copyright © 2020 tender-rosiey

do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported

[linaselandbasil]

The pebble comparison instance

Ibrahim that didn't fit into the main fic, its uploaded to AO3 too, of you like to read there

Trigger warning: painkillers, manic episodes, a little bit ofmedical stuff

Kassvin....

All he had on him were bloodstained clothes and a backpack. As he was taken to the infirmary he kept saying things that didn't make any sense. Normal as far as concussions go.

'Yo, the grim reaper slid into my DMs!' Was Valkyons favourite, but he'll never tell that to anyone.

The healers suspected that it's from brain damage since this rambling hadnt stopped yet. It gets exponentially worse with the painkillers too.

Of course, Valkyon could understand him somewhat. A feat noone else could achieve thus far, and it seemed that Kassvin took a liking to him because of it.

He spent a lot of time with the amnesiac, he confessed to his friends that he feels bad for leaving the poor guy alone because he reminds Valkyon of someone who's no longer here. And he's the only person who can tell the difference between his regular rambling and the drug induced gibberish.

He spent a lot of time with Kass, even if it hurt him, even if Kassvin hurt him... They went on little adventures so he didn't stay cooped up in the infirmary for days, he hated being there. Always on edge and anxious about all those people he could recognise.

Kass barely remembers the last meal he had on some days...

The beach is his least favourite place to visit yet they always end up going there, Valky deemed they forest way too risky. 'no, you're going to wander off and I'll never find you again. I'm not going to let that happen!' his reasoning.

Beach it is, then.

"Me." Kass said, pointing at a small pebble in the sand. He has a habit to speak as oversimplified as possible, still hard to understand but what is Valkyon if not an expert at 'if few word gud why many word'.

"Me." Valkyon said, pointing at a bigger pebble right next to it. Kass cracked up at that, covering his nose. The amnesiac lost none of his quirky expressions, who knows why he felt that his nose should be covered when he laughs.

The warrior smiles, it's a nice moment of lucidity. The golden hour when all the pain is dulled but the nightmare hasn't started.

He's almost completely here..... Like a normal person who dosen't live on painkillers.

Kassvin fell to his knees trying to retrieve the stones, Val following him to the ground, perhaps a bit too worried.

Kass picked the smaller one up. "it's coz I'm short, inni?"

"Don't take it to heart." Valkyon picked the other pebble up, revealing that it was actually bigger under the sand than it seemed.

"The universe is trying to tell me something about you......." Kassvin said, snickering.

"Snitches get stitches, universe!" Val laughed too. "Mood." He pointed at the dried up corpse of a beached jellyfish. Dark jokes are both of their favorite.

Kassvin let out a hearty cackle, then his expression turned completely blank.

This usually marks the beginning of the nightmare. The painkillers have a major side effect, they cause these episodes where Kass isn't there at all. But no matter what he says, how much he yells or how many times he hits Valkyon, the warrior refuses to leave. Even if it hurts, he refuses to abandon Kassvin at the darkest hour.

As he looked into those deep green irises he saw something change. It seemed like the light of recognition flashed in his eyes.

"I remember." Valkyon was caught off guard, he was expecting a breakdown..."I think I remembered something...." But instead got a ray of hope that Kassvin will regain everything he's lost.

[twewy-comix]

the big one-oh - let’s watch twewy

only two more after this!!!

LAST TIME: EVERYTHING SUCKS

“neku wake up! you fucked up big time” “beat”

they decide to go check out where they can get with their keypin. also a dude walks through neku and he hears his twitter feed

it’s indeed become homogenous - once known for being full of all sorts of individuals with their own viewpoints, it has been reduced to a wasteland of people shuffling about like zombies. not a single unique thought to be found. the same phrases, repeating endlessly, mindlessly...

...and that’s just what twitter was like BEFORE the replies meme amirite (canned laughter) (wild applause)

「えっ、ハネコマってハネコマ？」kawaii

and if there’s one person we can always trust, it’s joshua

anyway they continue their search for konishi

love this cat

thot detected

murder!

thot detected

after doing some murder and awkwardly-timed feelings jams, neku and beat find a wall that’s all fucky. i wonder who could possibly have done this

kawaii

they go through to udagawa, where the air is thick with space cat powder. the source seems to be the weird sigil sho drew, so neku tries taking pictures of the past to figure out wtf happened. he doesnt explain how it works to beat because “there’s no time,” which im sure won’t bite him in the ass later

(happy birthday tsudaken)

oh hey it’s our pals kariya and uzuki im sure they know what happened here

jk it’s a boss fight

the anime’s weirdly inconsistent about when it shows blood or not, huh

beat manages to knock uzuki’s red skull pin off, which im not sure was a thing in the game?

they realize they can reverse the brainwashing this way and remove kariya’s pin too, thus avoiding any senseless murder

honestly i didnt rly like how this scene was the last we see uzuki and kariya in the game*, so if the anime is changing that im fine with it. Let Them Live

(i mean theyre in neo twewy so we know they live) (but i thought they were double-dead for nine years, dammit)

*(but the last time i talked about that ppl got mad at me lmao)

haha... sure u are ;)

THE WHOLE BUILDING’S FUCKED UP (AND NOBODY NOTICED???)

oh ok. in the game beat just grabs the camera and uses up all the photos and they find something useful by pure luck lol

oh shit they found his catnip stash

hey havent we seen that design on an evil sky laser recently

yeah from an evil sky laser

oh. that too

anyway there’s a gold key pin in the envelope and a letter that says “try not to get killed by konishi”

wasnt he trying to help joshua get into the river? yet he had this keypin all along?? what gives??? you have to watch the secret reports OVA to find out

oh no

yeah and the weird art installation’s in the way too

male gaze

OH COME ON THEYRE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE 

nope, nothing to see here, move along

murder accusation #2...

...ignored

(he doesn’t say megs/megu-chan here. fascinating)

OH. UH. OKAY

some context: here’s the game’s version of this scene:

nine years ago i drew this comic based on that scene (which i re-uploaded earlier today):

but i hadnt read the secret reports yet back then, and on my second or third playthrough i thought “oh maybe he actually meant hanekoma here”

also earlier today i was musing on that and thinking “nah, probably not, but given how the anime framed his resurrection it’d be really funny if he was” because hanekoma was RIGHT BEHIND HIM

but here we are. he really was looking for hanekoma, who was right behind him. that answers that!!!

but i guess the question here is: is hanekoma the composer? or rather, does sho think hanekoma is the composer?

(i know the answer ofc. probably.)

anyway yeah it’s funny. and also way funnier after i said “nah probably not, he couldnt POSSIBLY be THAT much of a dumbass”

no, dude, you cant tap him on the screen or he’ll just teleport all over the goddamn place. you gotta aim your shots through him, like the guy you really wanna hit is standing behind this asshole

unfortunately not everyone can be a super awesome gamer like me so they get their asses kicked. and--wait what

day six....? in the game they were on the last day, right? what do they need an extra day for?? and by they i mean the writers

bunp

NEXT TIME: THE END EXCEPT NOT BECAUSE THERE’S TWO EPISODES LEFT BUT IT LOOKS LIKE THEYRE GONNA DO ALMOST EVERYTHING IN THE NEXT ONE AND IDK HOW THEYLL HAVE ENOUGH TO FILL THE LAST

[fandomsyoulove]

All the events that lead to Sirius running away from his family.

Sirius Black x reader, Sirius Black x Potter reader, Regulus Black x reader.

Summary: A ball in Grimauld Place doesnt end as expected either for Sirius Black or Lena Potter, James´s sister.

Author´s note: Okay, this is a part of a story Ive been writting lately. I never post what I write, but I just felt like sharing it. If someone wants it I can upload more parts. Thank you xx. PD: Enlgish is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes.

Words: 3200. 

Lena breathed deeply standing in the mirror. Regulus had invited her to their family yearly ball and she was mortified. She was so done with that family, they were ruinous, bad people. Her mind drifted to the two brothers. Regulus would be glad she was going, and she also felt that Sirius would appreciate it. After their rendevouz in the Room of Requirements their friendship was as strong as ever. She would spend more time with the Marauders since then, distancing herself from her Slytherin boys, to the Gryffindors joy. She knew how bad the two boys had it and wished time and time again that she had any power over them and she could just bring them home, away from those irresponsible parents.

It was not only Walburga and Orion that she had to worry about, it was also Bellatrix, and Narcisa's boyfriend, Lucius. Pureblood supremacy talk was the usual take in these events and she really dreaded to go. How in their right mind would want to spend hours in the same room as all of those racist supremacists? It was tiresome, to say the least. Still, as always, she couldn't help to want their approval. So she had bought a green dress with some straps on the back. It was silky, and she hoped to blend in. Obviously, she had Reg in mind. She wanted to make an impression on him. They had been together for the whole year and she felt the need to constantly live up to his standards. Of course he had the same pressure, they both shared it, that's why the two had to be perfect.

Ever since the room of requirements incident, in which Lena and Sirius had almost kissed each other, on multiple occasions, she had tried not to think about his words. That confession she was not supposed to have heard. Well if it had been for Sirius, he would have woken her up and told her. But she knew he had his brother to think of. And so did she. Thats why she concentrated hard in being his friend now more than ever. She figured that if she was to keep on with these confusing feelings, she would have to maintain their friendship, not talking would just make her want to see him even more.

All of these thoughts clouded her mind as she was putting on her make up. Her lips a bright red, his eye shadow dark. Just in that instant, his brother made an appearance.

- My, my, sis you look stuning.- he complimented her as he turned her and the dress lightly swayed.

- Thanks, James.- she smiled and soon James turned serious.

- I need to ask you something. - he pleaded, the girl just nodded asking him to continue. - Can you please have an eye on Padfoot?- he asked preocupied for his friend.

- I will, dont you worry. He is my friend as well.- she responded taking his hand.

- I know, I know. Its just, I wish I could be there with him. He never talks about it, just curses his mother over and over again. - the girl nodded.

- I know, dont worry about that. You are a good friend. - she was quick to reply.

- I try.- he smiled once again, hugging his sister before they made their way out to where their parents were hanging out.

- You look absolutely gorgeous.- Euphemia Potter took her in.

- Thank Merlin Regulus is a chivalrous kid.- Fleamont raised his brows.- You really are stunning, Lena. - he complimented. She smiled once again, lightly caressing her curly short hair so it would fall into place.

- I better get going.- she finally spoke making her way to the fireplace.

- Grimlaud place 12.- she shouted, careful not to get ashes on her dress.

When she arrived, the room was abandoned, except for Sirius Black.

- Lena!- he greated smirking as always. He quickly hugged her, not really taking in her appeareance until they backed from the other. His hand grabbed hers.

- You look so amazing! That dress fits you in every place.- he spoke bewilded with the girl who had a large smile on her face.- I wish it were red but hey, at least it has a slit on the leg. - his eyes roamed over her, who was already red from all the blushing.

- You look great as well, Siri. I mean you usually look good, more than good. But that tunic is working miracles.- she began talking, not knowing what had come over her.

- Be careful now. One would think that you wanted some of this.- he gestured to himself. The girl laughed loudly, and suddenly, Regulus was at the door. The two quickly separated.

- Reg!- she screamed, hugging him tightly, not noticing Sirius threatening expression.

- I thought you couldn't be prettier, guess I was wrong.- he looked at her adoringly, just as Sirius had a few moments ago.

- Well I thought the same, none of us was right.- both laughed before kissing. The older brother gagged behind them before making his way to the ball on the living room.

- I missed you.- she spoke while she caressed his face. He smiled at this, finally in comfort in her hands.

- I did too, more than you know.- he replied grabbing her hands and linking them over his chest.

- Well, we shouldn't keep the others waiting should we?- she smiled, trying to cheer him up.

- We will leave them breathless, even Cissy and that Malfoy.- he replied and both laughing made their way to the ball.

The black hall was decorated with plenty of silver and green decorations. Lena stared at the room in awe, and also a little bit disgusted. It was dark, with the black walls and all, the only light coming from the gigantic lights.

The two tried to walk with confidence. Her hand on his, holding it tightly, reasuringly.

Soon everybody's atention was on them. Some compliments from Walburga, Orion being proud of the Slytherin colours, Narcissa loving the hair. All viewed by a lurking Sirius that already had a glass of wine in his hand.

- You love her, dont you?- his favourite cousin stood next to him, in a gorgeous black dress.

- I dont know what your talking about.- he tried to play it cool, drinking some more wine.

- Cmon, Sirius. It is quite obvious. You cannot keep your eyes from her. - she replied, trying to get him to confess.

- Maybe I do. But I cant do anything about it.- he said lowly, dwoning yet another cup, this time champagne.

- It is a terrible situation you find yourself in. Both options ahead of you, you can try to be the good brother, or go for the girl. - she reasoned.

- Where is Ted?- Sirius tried to change the topic but his tone was harsh.

- Shhh, keep quiet will you?- she pleaded hoping that no one had heard.

-Ah, but that is a terrible situation.- Sirius spoke bitterly. To which his cousin just replied.

- I dont care that you are heartbroken, dont mention him here. That is a very sensible topic.- she spoke, serious all of a sudden.

- Im sorry. Alcohol and anger are not a good mix.- he tried to sound remorseful. The older Black understood and just left him.

Over and over again Sirius cursed himself. He should've told her over the moments he had this past year. Why hadnt him? How could he let this happen? Lena was dancing gracefully with Regulus, both laughing at something she had said. His hateful parents stared at the couple grinning. Lena and Reg were the perfect couple and everybody knew it. How could he have allowed this to happen. It should be him, dancing with her. It should be him making her laugh. It should be him, who his parents would gaze at with pride.

But there he was, already having a few too many drinks. Making a show of himself, perpetuating the view his family had of him. It was crazy how much he despised every single one of them. He wanted to take the girl, runaway with her and never turn back.

A few hours passed and nothing seemed to change. Every once in a while his parents would scold him for drinking too much or asking him to stop sulking around. But what else could he do? When the girl he adored didnt leave his brotherss side.

Even Andromeda was dancing with the couple, seeming to be very close with the Potter. Slytherin budies, Sirius thought. He felt betrayed, miserable, this was unberable. He needed to leave, he could only hope that the night would end soon. But oh how wrong he was.

- It seems like you are having a great time.- the only moment he had taken his eyes off her, she had made her way towards him.

- Haha, youre funny. - he resorted.

- Cmon, Siri. Ive seen you all night only moving to grab more drinks. You are the life of the party.- she continued to joke.

- Well this is hell. - he added staring at her with anger.

- I know, right?- she replied laughing to which he raised his brows. - What?- she asked taking his cup and drinking from it.

- You dont seem too bad with Reggie and my lovely parents.- he said bitterly.

- How have you sneaked firewhiskey in here?- she wondered taking another big gulp from it, without ackonwledging him.

- shhh. - he tried shutting her up, but her laugh was contagious.

- Oh Cmon. - she laughed again grabbing his arm.

- Lena, Ive had way too much to drink and I see that you are served as well so maybe try to lay off the booze. - his attempt at being responsible was cut off by the girl.

- Im not that bad, you aren't either. Now, we should dance.- she reached for his hand.

The boy just stared at the gorgeous girl, this was his dream, wasn't it?

- Cmon, Reg is dancing with your mum and I really dont want to dance with your father. So please.- she pleaded with puppy eyes. Sirius felt like he couldnt move, not saying a word, his eyes fixed on her. - Sirius, are you with us?- she asked when she didnt get a response. Finally, breaking from his trance, the boy took her hand and smiled.

- Ive been waiting the whole night for you to ask me to dance.- he whispered in her ear once they linked arms at the dance floor. She just smiled, squeezing his hand tighter. He, in response, gripped her waist. She found it hard to breathe, not daring to look at him. Soon they were waltzing around the room. Neither could say a word, only the music could be heard. Their eyes fixed on the others. They moved gracefully, without paying much atention to the rest. They didnt notice the stranged look on Sirius parents, or Regs anoyed look.

- Im sorry. Ive tried to come to you a few times, but Reg wouldnt allow me to leave his side. - she finally spoke as a slower song played and they continued moving through the hall.

- Dont worry, the wait was worth it.- he replied, and another smile crept into her face. His grey eyes on her hazels. Suddenly, Sirius turned her around, and when they were back face to face, she noticed his stern look, she mimicked him, not knowing if she had done something wrong. - I dont like Regulus treating you like that. - he stated, his eyes everywhere but on her.

- He needs me, Siri. - she quickly replied as they tilted to the side. - Besides, I knew I would be able to see you after some time. - she added. - If I really had wanted to, trust me, I would have come. - Sirius frown became wider.

- I knew the wait would make this more worth a while.- she whispered in his ear, her lips barely centimeters away. He breathed in deeply, closing his eyes, smelling her perfume, she was so close to him.

The song ended abruptly and they separated to applaud, still gazing at the other.

Andromeda made her way towards them looking stunning.

- Im sorry darling. - she referred to the girl. - I havent danced with my cousin for the whole night. Would you mind?- she pleaded, looking at the younger Black that still hadnt processed what had happened.

- Of course, Drome.- she said lovingly to her friend. - Ill leave you to it.- she added smiling, her hand reaching for his arm for a few seconds.

The boy turned quickly when she walked past him, but soon, his cousin moved his head with her hands to fix his gaze on her.

- You are so in love.- she smiled, her dark eyes filled with love for him.

- I cannot help it. - he turned them around so he could stare at her once again. - She is perfect.- he added, lovestruck. His lips parted, adoration clear in his eyes.

- I dont know how this will turn out, but either way Im invested.- Andromeda joked, messing with Sirius hair, making him turn towards her annoyed, but smiling deep down.

A few more hours passed, without much trouble. Sirius had some laughs with Andromeda, Lena was able to dance with him for another long while. He supposed this was the best he could have expected for the night. Of course some of the firewhiskey he had drowned in helped too.

Everything seemed to have turned out fine in the end. That was until he heard Malfoy speak. He had tried to avoid listening to them, staying as far away as he could from them. But he was next to his cousin that was tying her shoe when he heard a name too familiar to him.

- Take Lilly Evans, she is a mud-blood, but she tries to seem smarter.- Sirius was used to them boasting about blood superiority, he could pass that, knowing that if he reacted, only Andromeda and Lena would help him.

- She is a know-it-all. But when we put them into place, theyll know what is good. All of that intelligence wont be worth much.- Bellatrix added, disgusted.

The boy balled his hands into fists, his breathing erratic. If James were here, he wouldnt allow any of this. How could he? He was no better than any of them. He was sick and tired of this. Next to him, Lena appeared grabbing his hand.

- I cant wait for the day those people dont atend Hogwarts. The school would be just as it should be, without mudbloods. Just as Salazar Slytherin would have wanted. - Lucius agreed with the Black sister. Narcissa keeping quiet.

Andromeda stood next to the couple, also trying to think what to do. Sirius parents were on the other side of the hall, with Regulus, talking with some ministry people. The boy felt the anger boiling in him, his heartbeat racing.

- Malfoy, the school wont be perfect until you are gone.- he quickly made his way towards him, the two girls following him.

- Ah, blood traitor, you are the next, after the clensing of the mudbloods. - Bellatrix hissed at him, Rodolphus joining them.

- Im so ashamed to share your last name.- Sirius resorted, going towards her, wand in hand. But Rabastan stepped in front of her and Lena grabbed his arm.

- Sirius, its not worth it.- Lena tried to reason with him, pleading him with her soft gaze and calm voice. The boy began calming his breathing before turning around.

- A blood traitor and a coward, you have it all, dear cousin. Why Orion and Walburga put up with you scapes my knowledge. - Bellatrix lunged for him, ending in Rodolphuss arms, holding her.

- Shut up you crazy bitch!- Sirius didnt have time to think about what he was doing, before grabbing his wand again.

-Sirius!- Lena shouted but he was already gone.

- You dare talk to me like that? Gryffindor.- his cousin kept trying to get him angrier.

Soon Sirius and her were face to face, wand at the other. Everyone had turned to them, including Sirius parents. Their son had his back towards them, one look from his wife and Orion knew what to do.

- Expeliermus!- Sirius ended up on the floor, his wand on the other side of the room. Bellatrix and Lucius laughed while Walburga began shouting at his son.

- What the hell?- Lena screamed, having too much of this family, quickly reaching Sirius.

- Are you okay?- she asked taking his head on her hands, supporting him on her knees.

- My head hurts.- he exclaimed, his hand reaching hers.

- Leave with me. - she pleaded, tears on her eyes. Both stayed like that while the party ended.

The people from the ministry left, and soon only the closest Black family members stayed. Regulus made his way towards the two, after being scolded by his mother on how Lena had acted.

- Lena, you have to go. - he tried grabbing her arm standing, but she yanked him away.

- You should leave. Both of you, come with me, now.- she begged time and time again, her vision now blurry.

Both Black brothers saw her in distress, not knowing what to do. While Walburga cursed his son, and Bellatrix accompanied her, Sirius took her hands and moved them from his face.

- Its okay, Lena. You dont want to be on the other end of her rage. - he said lowly. Regulus just stared, not knowing how to feel.

- I can´t leave you here.- she said between sobs.

- Ill be fine, I always am, arent I?- he tried to smile to the girl that held his heart. She nodded before helping him up.

- I love you.- she whispered in his ear as she hugged him goodbye.

- I love you too.- he responded, before she kissed his cheek.

Then, drying her tears, she made her way to Regulus that was still in shock. When she reached him, he reacted, leading her to the living room. None could speak, both feeling too many things all at once. Rage, horror, impotence, love. They didnt even share a single touch on the way.

- Bye, Regulus.- she said bluntly before turning for the chimney.

[yayninjabob]

A story behind a story

I have never wrote 100,000 words of anything in my life and 9 months ago when I first sat down to write Villain: Redux I definitely did NOT anticipate the length it would reach by the end of Part I. Now that it is done though I feel like I can talk about it.  Well not really the story but the story behind the story?  

A very lengthy and personal author's note for Part I: Remote Control

How I started writing again: My relationship with my writing was non existent for years.  I honestly went through a very long drought where I felt like everything I created just sucked so bad and I had zero motivation for creating shit.  I would talk with my therapist or my wife and friends about feeling so out of touch with my creative side and feeling pretty lost without it.  Really, I pretty much felt like it was dead forever.  I eventually started a personal journal again... And little drabbles here and there would come to mind... It felt alright but meh. "What did you enjoy about writing that you still feel is missing?" I was asked. Ffffffuck me I dont know.  Writing as a teen and in my early twenties wasn't something I ever thought about even when I did it every damn day of my life.  I guess I missed having that ongoing plot in the back of my head that I could escape to whenever life was lame. Daydreaming crazy stories as a kid was just my favorite past time and writing went with it.  But I just didnt have any more stories in my head. Nothing new or exciting enough at least. Anyways. January was my dads bday.  2019 and that year my dad asked for something.  Now my dad isn't one to ask for gifts. No, normally he is extremely frustrating and expects everyone to read his mind while saying "I dont care" yet if his gifts dont meet his secretive expectations he gets all butthurt and emo and says that nobody knows him.  Ok but January 2019 he asks me to write him something.   "What?  A story?  A poem?  A birthday card?" "I dont care just write me something." Typical. "I dont care."  Yeah right.  What the hell does he expect from me jeez.... My dad was the OG storyteller in my life- real shit or bullshit- he could spin a crazy story like no one else. My uncles and his friends would sit around smoking and drinking and listening to one wild tale after the next.   He could entertain people for HOURS just with the shit he’d say.  I always thought he'd make a brilliant stand up comedian but my dad would just laugh at the idea. So for his gift I figured I'd retell one of his personal wild tales - his first encounter with a mountain lion at 12 during a hunting trip with my late great uncle Joe who was his adoptive father figure.  Honestly my dad was always so incredibly descriptive and I heard that tale about a bazillion times growing up, and even though he hadnt shared it in probably 15+ years, it was easy to recall. I could just close my eyes and see it clear as day.  I stayed loyal to his story but I used my own words.  It really surprised me how easy I found those words though.  Writing had been such an impossible challenge for so long yet when I finished the short story I had written 12 pages in a single afternoon and I was shocked but in a good way.  It was his story so I was pretty sure he would like it. He's got a pretty big ego lol. I typed it up on the typewriter my dad had gotten me back when I was a teen and serious about becoming a "real writer."  I figured he would appreciate that.  I gave him the story on his birthday.  He didnt read it right away. We went to the backyard and the two of us shared a joint and while I started chasing the dogs in the yard for a bit I saw he finally picked the story up. And when he finished he started crying. Which is always weird when it's your dad right?  He isn't one to cry easily. Last time I saw tears in his eyes was three years prior at my wedding but even that wasnt like this.  He told me "You need to write again.   You need to try." But I still felt like I couldn't. I never really thought I was good at it anyway.  Sure, people told me they liked my writing and it meant a lot that my dad was moved so much by my short story that I started to believe “hey maybe I can write,” but... I dunno.  I had a rough idea for an original novel that I sat down with later that month and tried to work out... But it just felt forced and uninteresting.  It wasnt a story my mind could just escape to effortlessly.  The passion just wasnt there. After a while my wife suggested to me "Well when you retold your dad's story that was easier right?  Maybe you should retell another story that you love." And so in August 2019 I sat down and wrote what would eventually become the scarring scene for Villain: Redux

Part I:  Remote Control I spent the rest of August, September and October slowly falling back into my old world of Villain.  I reread both Villain and VillainE for the first time in yeeeeeears.  What. A. Trip. So much stood out to me that was like "Ok young me, I see where you were going but this could be so much better."  I made my list of what I liked and what I wanted to change.. Constructed my outline and then I just went for it.   Halloween night that year was spent finishing my first draft of chapter 1.  It was still in Buttercup's limited POV.  I liked it OK enough but I wondered if it would be improved if I tried third person instead.  I said "fuck it why not" and went for it again but in third person, adding the beginning history of Townsville and then the opening scene with Mojo.   When I finished it I was pretty amused with it and I found myself just starting right away on chapter 2 and adding even more details to my overall outline- it became a trilogy.  It was flowing SO easy and for once writing didnt feel like some forced chore I was performing.   The entire time though I debated whether or not to share any of it.  I didn't think anyone would read it.  But personally, I was falling in love with my new rendition and I really didn't want to stop writing it. So once again I said "fuck it why not" and I started this tumblr to start documenting my new commitment to rewriting Villain for good.  I edited the first chapter and uploaded it a couple days before Thanksgiving. And the support I got from readers honestly made me cry haha... I really really thought the story would go unnoticed.  After all, when I first started writing for the PpG fandom it was always an uphill battle and 90 percent of my first reviews were just flames and criticism.  The original Villain really took a while to gain much of a readership and even though it had its moment of somewhat popularity in the fandom, that moment came after it was completed. A brief glance at the PpG section on FFnet showed me that things really hadnt changed- still 99 percent PpGxRrB romances.  Man, it just seemed so unfair. I freaking love this show and TBH I will never understand the fandom's fixation on those damn Rowdyruffs.  Whatever.  It is what it is.  But because of that and because I hadnt been an active writer in the fandom for like a decade I really thought I'd be lucky to get one review.   And I did!  On the first day!  And I was PUMPED lol.   Then over the next couple of days I got more and most from names I recognized from the past!  I was so touched by some of the things you guys said, you will have no idea what those first 7 reviews meant to me.  And of course the reviews to follow throughout the next chapters only continued to motivate me further. And now I'm done with Part I.  Jeez what a freaking journey.  I feel like I've learned a lot though and I hope that the story only improves from here.   Today, this story invades my subconscious more than I would like to admit.  But.  It is so nice to have an exciting story to escape to once more.  And I feel like I can say that my creative drive is finally restored again which feels amazing.  Who knew it would be this rewrite of all things to do it. So yeah.  I owe the biggest thanks to my readers (the reviewers especially), my wife, and of course my dad.   I know we are just at the beginning of this story, but personally I just feel like I've accomplished more than I could've imagined already... like I said... 100,000 words is something I’ve never done before lol.  And I cant wait to share the rest of the story with everyone.   Anyways that’s my long soppy backstory on how I decided to rewrite Villain.  Thanks for reading. :)

[yeoldontknow]

Tuesday, Saturday and May ❤️

hello love! thank you for sending some in!

tuesday: name a fic you have posted which you think is overrated?mmmmm i dont think i have any tbh? the fics i get the most asks about are hero, as still as sound, and wyrm tamer, and while those are probably my most popular series i still dont think theyre overrated? like, i adore them and i adore writing them, and any time i reflect on them im still so proud and enamored with them. my most popular one shot by far is truth, but even that...isnt like crazy wildly popular? for me, overrated means something EVERYONE talks about or EVERYONE likes/shares and that i feel probably didnt deserve that attention and i dont like approaching writing from that direction? im really grateful for every single like or ask or reblog, and it takes me a considerable amount of time to get something finished that i think is worth posting so idk if i could ever think something is overrated. i cared too much about it lmao

saturday: what gets you excited whilst writing?oh gosh all sorts of things. mostly dialogue excites me. it helps me structure the flow of the narrative, and i come from a background in film so getting a comfortable flow makes me feel relighted and better prepared to continue writing. also, connecting things within a scene or a larger plot arc truly just...makes me feel like everything was worth it. i love creating parallels or symbols, foreshadowing, etc in my fics, so when i get to reveal those or add a new layer to them it gives me a thrill lol

may: a fic you have regretted posting?mmmmm possibly it was the night, my phantom of the opera!pcy series,. i adore that story so so much but ive written myself into a bit of a wall, and ive slowly worked on it but i wish i hadnt uploaded it so quickly before i really knew how i wanted it to go. its the only fic ive written and posted without a proper outline so ive been yelling at myself for that. also the prologue to virgin in furs. i ADORE it and im SO EXCITED to write that series but im mad at myself for adding yet another series when i need to focus on finishing other works. so those two probably the most and for different reasons.

fanfic asks: theme time!

[angel-scythe]

I need you : Chapter 9

Hi people !

Thanks again to be there! I hope you will love it! This is a short chapter where nothing big happen and still... !!

If you want to read it on ao3, smash my door |   °| or keep reading?

“I’m here since

8

Days”

 That was the little board in front of Niles was saying. The man was sat on the couch, sorting out the mail. His phone was just near the board. He glanced toward his room as he did so often. His room and then the whole apartment. That austerity started to really bother him. He tried to keep himself busy to stay in this reality. Gavin’s reality. But sometimes, like now, it became really hard.

Everything was pushing him to retreat on himself.

When he had realized that, at the moment where Gavin took out the trash, he had turned off the TV. He didn’t want to stay in front of TV, looking all the time the same documentary. When he was doing something, he wasn’t mopping on himself the problem? He wasn’t able to get up and busy him with anything… He could only do what was within reach.

And it was few things.

When the door opened, he tried to get up but as much he could push on his arms, he felt his legs really weak and let himself fall in the couch as soon as Gavin was in the house. He didn’t saw him but that was okay. The Android came to him and took the empty bowl of soup to bring it back to the kitchen.

“Tonight, I’ll prepare you another soup, you’ll love it, I think.”

“Tonight?”

Gavin looked toward Niles.

“Don’t you think eating more than one time a day wouldn’t be a good thing?”

“I don’t know, Gavin.”

“If you eat well, you’ll have more strength and you’ll be able to do more.”

“I’ve a bad appetite…” Niles remembered.

The Android turned his head and started to make the dishes. In fact, the man appreciated the other didn’t force him. He tried a bit but he wouldn’t do it again and again until he’ll yield.

Maybe in few days, he’ll be able to eat? But not now. Even though that should give him strength.

He could see progress and yet that was already a big change for him…

He wanted to do a lot of things but he also knew he should not hurry the things. He even looked for exercise to muscle his legs and be able to walk again without Gavin help. Though he’d  love to throw his arms around his neck any time.

“I’m a little robot, short and strong. Here are my handles, just turn me on. When I get all warmed up, watch me go. Sometimes fast and sometimes slow.”

That song…that soft song. He continued to whisper it, all the time. He did it when he was doing repetitive task, or when he was alone. He didn’t get the song though but still liked to hear Gavin sung it.

When the Android had finish to clean everything, he came in the living room and stretched himself. He still had his random uniform with white jacket and blue lighting. He came next to Niles.

“How is the mail?”

“Sort out.”

“Nice.”

Niles took his phone.

“Do you want to help me?”

“For what?”

“I’d like to bright this apartment. There is… nothing there…”

“Yay! That would be fun! First, you need a Hang in there cat poster.”

“Okay.” Niles gave him the phone. “Choose it.”

“Why?”

“You’re living there too so I think it will be nice if you decorate with me. And I’ve poor taste,” he added with a face.

“Do you think I’ve better taste?” he laughed.

“Yeah? You thought about the poster.”

Gavin nodded but for him, it was a joke.

“You don’t think about a thing? In movie you like for example? People you like?”

Nines thought about that. He couldn’t remember his mother decorating, in fact. Even in his childhood house it wasn’t really bright. The only thing a bit odd he could remember, it was the lot of flowers everywhere. She could take care of them for hours.

“I know what I want.”

“Yay?”

“Let’s take a pic’.”

“Of us?”

Niles nodded. He could upload the photo on one of his tablet and he’ll keep it activate to have the picture. He also could use another for one with him and Connor. Or use a program for the images to switch?

Gavin smiled. “You see, you’ve wonderful idea. I like that. I don’t often take a pic’ with someone but there, I’m really excited.”

“So… it happened?”

The Android glanced to him and shrugged, letting out a little ‘yay’.

“Let’s take that pic’. What do you want? We look like bitch? We’re silly? We’re serious? We’re cop! … No, not cop. Cop sucks. We can be cute also. You’re cute.” He tilted his head with a smile. “And sexy.”

“You’re beautiful.”

“Thanks!”

“Let’s take a pic’ that look like us. That’s what I’d like.”

“Then you must pass your arms around my neck!”

Niles pressed himself against him and passed an arm around his shoulders. Gavin hugged him back and when he started to take the pics, they were looking each other because… what looking else?

  Gavin stretched as the Human was looking furniture on his telephone. Except the poster and the photo, he hadn’t choice anything. He really wasn’t good at that. Each time, he asked to the Android his advices. But he couldn’t decide. Each time he looked all those things, that seemed useless for him, too bright? Too big? Too ridicule? And when he asked to Gavin his advice… He loved everything. More it was useless, bright, big and ridicule, more he loved. He seemed to think it was the point to decorating.

But he couldn’t. He needed something useful.

And he felt so stupid because he needed so much to have something useful when it wasn’t the point. For example, he even never had a coverlet.

“I can’t do that,” he finally gave up.

“Hang in there!” Gavin said, pushing him at the temple.

“Hm… Maybe.”

“Let’s try from somewhere else. What do you need?”

“I need…”

Niles groaned. He had everything he needed, of course. When he needed something, he bought it and there we are.

“Where did you live when you were cop?” he asked. “What did you have there?”

Gavin looked away and took the skirts of his hoodie to tug it.

Damn. He had made a mistake.

Once again.

“I lived at the Precinct. With the others Androids. We were supposed to be in Standby and used when they needed us…”

“But you…”

“I quickly stopped to go in Standby. But… I wasn’t a Deviant yet.”

Niles nodded. In fact, he didn’t know well the Androids. He had few cases but due to his mother’s relation with them, and Elijah Kamski, he didn’t really know what he should know about them. The most he knew, it was because of case he had with Connor.

That wasn’t much.

Gavin probably knew better than him if he was Deviant yet or not. Thought he’d said he was surely already since he stopped to do what he must do…

“Still, there was nothing there.”

“Then, you should definitely help me.”

“You only ask that because you don’t know what to do!”

“Just a bit.”

Gavin smiled to him. “You can’t fool me!” He bent over him and looked the phone.

Niles was looking for colorful pencil. Why not? It was a start.

“Hm… What room do you want change the most?” the Android asked.

The Human frowned. It was hard. Each room needed to be changed if you think about brightening everything. But he needed to do something important. He needed to change because he wanted to be able to face this world again. He felt so many strange things now. A second he felt he could do the difference, got up and just start to live again and the last one, everything was crumbling in the floor.

It was like trying to do a beautiful drawing with domino in the middle of the storm.

He couldn’t even figure out what drawing he wanted to do since the wind was so powerful.

Gavin stared him patiently, glancing sometime toward the window where you could see the snow. He even looked him as he was pushing back that hoodie. He wanted to rise and turn around the sofa to kiss that LED which never stopped changing its color. In a way, you could think this GV200 was weak but for Niles who never showed emotion because it was bad, that looked so powerful.

Sometimes, he was jealous of his brother because he had so much joy in his live. Each time he thought about him, there was a mix of powerful joy and awful sadness because he didn’t get why they were twin, raised in the same way and still…

“Can you sleep?”

“No. Only went to standby.”

“So you find no interest at sleeping?”

“It’s strange to explain. I can if I want and sometime, I even can… dream? I think?” He shrugged. “Never analyzed that.”

“What are you doing when I’m sleeping?”

Gavin shrugged. “Stuff.” He watched him. “What are you trying to ask?”

Niles sighed and looked his phone. In fact, the Android’s chin was almost on his shoulder and he could feel his warm. That pushed his heart to beat way faster.

“Don’t look at me like that, Niles Stern. I was a great Detective, you know. Dare to ask.”

“Will you say ‘yes’?” Niles said.

“It’s not the question I expected,” Gavin smiled.

“But if you say no…”

“You’re a tiny asshole.” Gavin looked him from toe to head. “You’re a big asshole! Even depress like you’re, you seem to be really skilled to have what you want? Seeing you in an interrogation room was probably really hot.”

“Never watched me doing that,” Niles replied. He sighed and his thumb pressed the screen, now black, of his phone. “Will you be okay… to sleep with me?”

“Yes.”

“Then…” Niles glanced toward his bedroom.

He never had needed a double bed, only a bed for him and nothing else. Yes, he had already brought partner there but he never intended to share the night with them as long as they had receive enough pleasure.

One time, Connor had been there and taunted him a bit because he wanted to sleep with him but except that, he really never had needed a bed for two.

Though he wasn’t sure he really needed one now. Being on Gavin was so good…

The GV200 was waiting for him to talk so he finished.

“We need to have a new bed.”

“Yeah! That’s the spirit! Take the most useless and ridicule one!”

Niles winced a bit. “Do you want? Maybe we could have something useful?”

“But not common. We will have a bedspread really zany.”

“Okay.”

Niles activated his phone and started to look. Gavin didn’t miss he wanted a coverlet with cat and he saw a lot very nice. This one with a bunch of cat, the other black with a white cat, this one with a big kitten. Or this one with “my place, cat’s place” with the cat’s place so big. What about the grumpy cat? The cat doing a fuck? So much! He could have chosen them all. And then, Niles found the ‘perfect one’, ‘really nice and zany’.

A white one with an effect like you had a cat sleeping in the edge of the cover.

“This one!”

“Damn you’re so cute,” Gavin said before kissing his cheek.

“You like it?” Niles asked.

“Yay! And for the bed?”

The man put this bedspread in the basket, knowing he’ll need some blankets and cover and maybe more pillow but first looked after a bed. He felt bold! Gavin was there and he was looking and he thought the quilt he had chosen was zany! He was doing well and he felt a bit of excitation. He couldn’t wait to try that and to send a pic to Connor. He will be so impress!

For the bed, he searched a lot.

He saw Gavin looking excited when they found a hamburger bed but he really couldn’t buy that. And that wouldn’t be cute with the bedspread! They find bed with soft curtains around and he liked that but it didn’t seem crazy enough. However, if he didn’t find a thing, that will be that.

They passed by high-tech and strange bed, even kid-bed like with the mattress in big boat or other strangeness like that.

It was hard because sometimes, it seemed like Gavin was really up for one but he couldn’t. Or it was way too expensive. For example, they both liked the one surrounded by woods but it was ten thousand dollars! Niles didn’t understand of that could work.

Some were funny thought. They laughed at the chocolate-bed and Gavin was really hyped by the big cat though that looked more like a joke than a bed. They found out a bed in a skull and Niles was a bit pleased but he could never sleep in that because it didn’t look comfy at all.

And there, he found something perfect!

“This one. What do you think about this one?”

It was an elevated bed but under it, there was a cupboard, some drawer and bookshelves.

Niles turned his head toward since Gavin hadn’t say a thing.

“It’s not good?”

Gavin bent on him and kissed him tenderly. “It’s perfect,” he said.

“You looked disappointed,” the man said, frowning.

Though, he had a tiny-tiny smile because of the kiss. It was just a peck, something quick but honestly? It was perfect and full of love.

“Absolutely not.” In fact, he was disappointed by himself.

That level of zany was sweet and perfect for Niles.

“Do you think you need something else for your room?”

“Blankets, pillows… What do you think else?”

Gavin shook his head.

“We don’t need to hurry up. This will be already awesome.”

“Okay,” Niles replied.

The GV200 watched him as he was looking for the materials they needed. Instead of white, maroon, black, grey, the Human went for color a bit brightly. He liked the blue-grey since few days and the light blue so he chose those tones.

“I’m really proud of you,” Gavin said softly to him.

And Niles’ heart shivered because… guess what? Except Connor, nobody never said that to him…

[thomosexual]

bitch answer all the even ones ok I love u

finally some fucking good questions

2. what’s your favourite radiohead song? (or, say, your top three faves?)

oh all of them but if i gotta give a real answer UHHHHH whatever song im feeling most varies day to day but today its i promise because it came on shuffle this morning and reminded me of my thom angel dream

4. according to you, what’s radiohead’s most underrated song?

oh trans-atlantic drawl. also fast-track. and kinetic. i cant believe people talk shit about amnesiacs more esoteric b-sides these go hard.

runner-up: i finally got to listen to coke babies after getting the acpg single and its actually pretty good and chill. underrated because i went 3 years of being a radiohead fan and never hearing it once. what the fuck

6. what do you think of cheesecake?

i try not to KLJSKDLFHKLSDHK

8. have you ever created fanart for the band? show us (if u want!)!

i provide good occasional cursed content in the form of drawings nobody asked for

10. favourite b-side?

oh thats cruel. its gotta be faithless the wonder boy tho because its Big Fucking Mood. but also polyethylene. and down is the new up. and bishops robes. and

12. do you have an ideal setlist? what is it?

it will include myxomatosis, climbing up the walls, reckoner, bangers + mash, down is the new up, at least half of tkol, and the live debut of the butcher.

14. what’s your least favourite album?

already answered!

16. have you ever met the band? if so, what was it like?

nooooo i wanted to but we didnt know what way the band would be leaving the sprint center in kc :’(((( roy wanted to get his copy of kid a signed...... sad day

18. when did you become a fan and how?

ok so ive told this story a few times but basically back in real early 2015 i was looking for music recs for a playlist and my friend zoe gave me a list of recs and thom yorke was on it so i looked him up on youtube and found the eraser and i got uh how you say, Hooked on black swan in particular and would just. listen to it on repeat for hours on end. think i broke 100 repeats on the site i was using.

so yea eventually i decide to look ‘im up on wikipedia, learn a bit more about him. saw he was in radiohead. gave ok computer a listen, also via youtube because beggars hadnt taken down all the album uploads yet. paranoid android sold me the rest was history. i then proceeded to order cds of okc kid a and the eraser Immediately with the rest following soon after.

20. have you listened to any of the members’ side projects? what did you think?

oh yes absolutely.... eagerly hoping for afp lp2 in particular. and phil lp3. and ed lp1 WHERE is your FUCKING album tall man

22-24: already answered but still shoutouts to climbing up the walls lighting.

[americaswritings]

Cinderella |Part 5

Prompt: Fairy tale AU

Summary: When your father marries another woman, she brings not only two evil stepsisters into the house, but turns you into a maid. Working hard day for day your only hope is the princes ball, where he will pick is future wife. But will you be able to flee from the claws of your family?

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: sexual harassment (short), me sucking at writing first meetings

Pairing: Steve x reader

A/N: This is for @ruckystarnes‘ writing challenge. 

Sorry, this took so long. My life is a little stressful atm, but I will upload as soon as possible.

Also Bucky is in this one!! 

Tags are open! Only through asks! Please consider leaving me feedback :)

You made your way over to the dance floor and stopped when you reached it. It looked like so much fun to dance, but nobody had asked you yet and you couldn’t dance on your own. So you spend the time admiring the dancers from your spot.

Only a few minutes later, a young man had appeared on your side. He held out his arm without any word and you took it without any hesitation. 

-

You felt as if you were flying The music and the group of other dancers made you feel comfortable while your dance partner twirled you around. 

He had light brown shoulder long hair, which was tugged behind his ears and irritating blue eyes, which made his appearance even more unique. You realized that you didn’t know his name and it was impossible to ask now, since you were breathless and occupied not to trip. 

The song ended and the partners were traded. A dark haired man stood before you, his hair messy and his green eyes puffy. You could smell the alcohol from his breath and immediately got uncomfortable. 

The dance started and he grabbed your hip, only he squeezed it a little too tight. “Nice party huh?”, he asked and the wave of alcohol hit your face. You turned your face away in disgust and only nodded as a response.

“You are a really pretty thing actually”, he observed and studied you closer. You tried to put distance between his body and yours, but it didn’t work. His grip was too firm. 

You gazed up to see that he was still examining your body, staring at places you weren’t comfortable with. Your breath quickened and you pushed against his chest, but he only laughed at your attempt to turn him down. “Pretty feisty as well, huh?”

Before you could react to it, the hands were removed from your hips and you found yourself in the arms of another man. You heared the dark haired man protest, but a sharp look from your new dance partner made him still and he left. 

“I am sorry about that”, the man apologized with a sad smile and put some space between your bodies. He had baby blue eyes and blonde hair, which shimmered golden in the dimmed light. He wore a white suit, which was decorated with buttons and insignias. 

It took you a moment to recognize him, but then you gasped in surprise. You had only seen the prince once, when he had still been a child himself. Your mother had taken you to the market that day and you had seen the king and his son. He had taught the young prince about different kind of prices, who hadn’t looked interested at all.

“Oh, I am sorry, my prince”, you responded and bowed your head for a second. “There is no need to be formal”, he told you with a smile and you blushed. You were beyond grateful that he had saved you from the other man, but didn’t know how to express your appreciation.

After that it was silent. You danced for the rest of the song and the song after that and the one after that one. None of you made a move to change partners and so you danced with the prince for a long time. Although none of you said a word you told each other so many things, as if you communicated through your moves. 

Your bodies were in perfect synth and you even forgot about your shoes and the heavy dress. You felt light and if the prince hadn’t held you in his arms you felt like you would have flown off.

When the song ended the prince pulled you a little closer. “You are an amazing dance partner”, he confessed and you felt your cheeks getting red. “Thank you. You aren’t that bad either”, you noted and he laughed. 

“That is because I had to take dancing lessons my whole life”, he admitted and you blushed again. “Oh.” He smiled at you.

“Excuse me”, a high pitched voice pulled you out of your gaze. You felt like you had woken up from a dream, a beautiful dream and had to go back to the dull reality.

“There are other people who want to dance with the prince as well”, the woman with raven hair and narrowed eyes acknowleged in an accusing voice. She was wearing a red dress, that showed more skin than it covered.

“Oh my god, I am sorry”, you blushed and stepped back. Maybe you had overstepped your boundary without realizing it.

The prince seemed to be uncomfortable himself. He gazed to the ground, not knowing what to say. 

You rushed off without a word and made your way out of the crowd. You needed to get some air. 

You spotted a backdoor and sneaked outside.

The night was cold, but provided fresh air, which filled your lungs promptly. You walked away from the castle, embarassed at what had just happened. How did you mess up everything good that happened to you?

You realized that you were in the gardens. You didn’t know if you were allowed to be here, but a stubborn part of you thought that it wouldn’t matter if they arrested you. Maybe going to prison was even better when going back to your stepmother and stepsisters.

You found a bench and sat down. From the castle you heared the clock hitting 11 beats. You had an hour left until you had to return home, still you felt like the evening had just started. 

All of this- the dress, the shoes, the make-up- the betrayal of your family- for what exactly? A moment of dancing? Was it even worth it?

You sat there in silence and tried to get a clear head. You didn’t know how much time had passed by, but suddenly you heared a branch cracking.

“Can I sit here?”, a voice pulled you out of your thoughts. The prince was standing in front of you, fiddling with his sleeves. You nodded and made space for him.

“I am sorry for what happened”, he apologized after he had sat down. “Oh, there is no reason to apologize”, you assured him, realizing it was the second time he had apologized to you this evening.

“I think there is”, he confessed, peeking at your face. “I put you in an uncomfortable situation and I am sorry for that.” 

You still saw no reason for him to feel guilty, but let it go with a smile. “How did you find me here?”, you wondered and turned to get a better look on his face.

“I saw you slip out of the hall”, he explained with a chuckle. “Aren’t you cold?”, he questioned and you shook your head. 

“Maybe a little”, you admitted shyly. 

The next thing happened so quickly that you had no time to protest. The prince took off his jacket and wrapped it around your shoulders. “Thank you.”You felt your cheeks getting red and tried to cover it up with a little cough.

“No need to thank me”, he grinned. “I am Steve by the way.” He held out his hand, but you hesitated to shake it. “I am not sure if it is appropriate if I called you that”, you pointed out.

“Nobody would know. Besides- I don’t care”, he responded with a grin and you nodded. “I am (y/n)”

-

You spend the rest of the night with Steve in the gardens. You wondered if nobody would question his absence, but he told you that the most people were probably to drunk to realize he was missing. 

He told you a lot about his life and himself and you felt like it made him feel better. There seemed to be a weight on his shoulders that he carried around his whole life and talking to somebody else made it better.

You wished that you could do the same, tell him everything about your life, but that wasn’t possible. You couldn’t betray your family like that nor could you trust the prince enough to reveal this secret.

You liked him, you really did; he seemed to be selfless and kind and caring, but once you would admit your secret you wouldn’t be able to take it back. There was a reason they treated you like this, and you figured once the prince would know, he wouldn’t look at you the same again.

How could he, when he would learn that you were a maid with no friends and no loved ones. If nobody loves you, something is really wrong if you. Maybe you don’t deserve love. Maybe you are worthless. 

Your stepmother had taught you that a long time ago and you couldn’t bare the prince looking at you in pity or disgust.

So every time Steve asked you something about yourself, you blocked. Instead you told him something else, mostly stories from your childhood when your mother had still been alive. When everything had been perfect.

“She seemes like a great woman”, he gently smiled at you. “I hope I will be able to meet her some day.” Your heart squeezed in pain at his words and you blinked away the tears. “I am sure she would love you”, you responded with a fake smile, but Steve had furrowed his brows. 

But before he could say anything the clock began to hit 12. Panicking you looked around. “Is everything alright?”, Steve asked worried. You nodded, but shook your head at the same time. “I have to go”, you stuttered and got up from the bench.

“Thank you for the jacket.” You pressed it to his chest and turned around. “And thank your for the nice evening”, you yelled over your shoulder while running away as fast as possible. 

“Wait, (y/n)”, you heared his baffled voice in the distance, but you couldn’t turn around. Fortunaley he wasn’t following you, so you only concentrated on making it home as quickly as possible.

You saw the first carriages taking people home and sped even more. 

If your family would be home before you were, they would kill you.

Tags: Permanent Tags: @capkilljoy @not-reptilian  @white-chocolate-mocha-fan @justanotherfangirl272 @theshortegg Marvel Tags: @iamwarrenspeace Steve Tags: @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory Cinderella Tags: @farfromjustordinary @wildestdreamsrps @sydthekid1518 @100kindsofblake @fantastic-fantasy-fanfics @its-forevermore @lobathenerd

Tags are open! Only through asks! Please leave feeback :)

[fanatic-af]

Silently Falling (L.H.)

A/N: *Nervously laughs* Hey, guys! I know, I suck at uploading. What I’m about to upload isn’t any better but alas, it’s something. I hope you guys like it :)

Masterlist || Ask

*****

“He’s back.”

“Have you seen him? Military school did that boy some good.”

“I know, right? Talk about muscles.”

“He’s hot.”

“Well, he was hot to begin with, but now he’s just oozing sexy.”

I had heard enough and slammed my locker door shut which made the group of girls gossiping a few lockers down from mine stop talking and look at me.

One of the girls leaned closer to her friend and said, “What’s the freak’s problem now?” As if I couldn’t hear every word that they were saying.

Deep breaths, Y/N. They’re not worth a detention.

I ignored the snide comments exchanged in their group that they didn’t even bother trying to whisper to each other, and stalked off down the hallway in the direction of my next class.

You might be asking, ‘Who are they talking about?’ or ‘Why am I so annoyed by their gossiping?’

“Sweetheart!” A voice boomed from behind me and here comes the man of the hour.

I shut my eyes for a moment as I mentally encouraged myself not to cut a bitch before lunch. I opened my eyes and ignored the footsteps approaching behind me as I continued walking.

“Sweetheart, didn’t you hear me calling you?” An arm was slung casually around my shoulders.

My eyes snapped up to his and I shoved him away as I saw the smirk on his face. “Leave me alone, Luke.” I mumble as I clutch my books to my chest and walk faster.

However, I forgot that Luke was six foot something with freakishly long legs, so he kept up with my pace easily.

“No can do, sweetheart.” He says in a light tone.

I did a small cheer in my head when I reached my classroom. I ignored Luke as I walked in and sat in my usual seat. I placed my belongings on my desk, now aware of the whispers in the room. I raised my head and was surprised to find Luke perched on the edge of my table with that stupid smirk on his lips.

“Why are you in here?” I finally ask him.

“How do you know that I don’t have this class as well?” He challenged me.

I raised an eyebrow at him and gave him a look that stated that I clearly didn’t believe him.

The second bell rang and my teacher’s voice rang throughout the classroom. “Mr. Hemmings. I suggest you leave my classroom and go to your correct one. You’re already late as it is and I highly doubt that you’d want a second detention.”

Luke didn’t even flinch to what my teacher had somewhat threatened. He simply stood up straight and raised his hands up in mock surrender. “I’m leaving, Mrs. Watts. No need for that detention slip.” He lowered his hands and flashed me a smile followed by giving me a wink. “I’ll see you later, sweetheart.” Then he confidently strode out of the classroom.

The whispering heightened and I could feel stares in every detention,

“Alright, settle down class. Let’s begin.”

####

The bell rang, signaling the end of class and the beginning of my temporary heaven…lunch. I quickly gathered all my belongings and dashed out the door to avoid any more stares and whispers.

What I was not expecting once I exited the classroom was Luke leaning against the wall opposite the door with a blank expression on his face. His eyes met mine and a smirk soon broke out onto his lips.

I tried to make a break for it, but his height gave him an advantage to catch up to me.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked as he strode beside me.

“I was hoping away from you.” I mumbled

Luke threw an arm around my shoulder. “Don’t be like that, sweetheart.”

I shoved his arm off my shoulder. “Stop calling me that.”

“What? Sweetheart? You don’t like terms of endearment?”

“Not when they come from you.” I bite back as we reach my locker.

He placed a hand over his heart. “You wound me, sweetheart.” He replied in fake hurt.

I rolled my eyes and opened my locker. “I’m sure you’ll survive.” I put away my belongings and shut my locker to head over to the cafeteria. I noticed that Luke hadn’t moved from his spot next to my locker. “Why can’t you leave me alone?”

He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by a hand touching his forearm. We both turned to see Shelly, aka the biggest – yet smartest – hoe in the school, and my number one bully.

“Luke, come sit with me at lunch. “She practically purred into his ear as she wrapped her arms around his right one.

I took that as my diversion and quickly snuck away from the two of them and headed towards the cafeteria. I was almost at the doors when an arm was slung over my shoulders again. I let out a groan and received a chuckle in response.

“I haven’t even done anything to make you annoyed with me today.”

I looked up and sighed as I took in the sight of my brother, Toby. “Sorry. It’s just been a really long day.”

He looked over our shoulders at something behind us. “Yeah? I can see that.” I knew what, or better yet, whom he was referring to.

We entered the cafeteria and into the semi-long lines to get our food before making our way to our table where our friends were waiting. We took our seats and almost immediately, Jack stole a fry off my tray.

I slapped his hand and the fry dropped onto the table.

Jack pouted at the fry then glared at me. “You just wasted a fry.”

“I wouldn’t have if someone hadn’t have stolen one in the first place.” I raised an eyebrow at him.

“It wouldn’t have if you had just let me have the fry.” Jack pouted.

I threw one at him in retaliation. It fell onto his tray to which he just picked it up and popped it into his mouth then flashed me a smile. “See? Was that so hard?”

I rolled my eyes but popped one in my mouth as well.

“Hey, Y/N? Why’s Luke staring at you?” Cami asked.

I followed her gaze and sure enough, Luke was sitting at a table in the corner of the room with his friends and his gaze was locked on me. As soon as we made eye contact, his signature smirk appeared on his lips. His smirk turned into a glare and I was confused as to why but an arm was placed over my shoulders which snapped me out of my reverie.

I looked at Jack to see that he had moved to sit beside me and glowered over at Luke. “What’s up?” I ask him.

He looked down at me with a goofy smile. “I just wanted more fries.” He cheekily said before grabbing a few more and stuffed them into his mouth.

I elbowed him in the stomach. “You owe me fries.”

“I only took, like, three!”

“Then explain why half of them are gone?”

He shrugged. “I’ll buy you more later.” With that said, he continued to steal my fries.

I rolled my eyes and shoved him off me.

####

“So, what’s going on between you and Manson?”

I jumped and peered around my locker door to see Luke leaning against the lockers on the other side. “What?”

“Is there something going on between you and Manson?” He repeated.

“What? No. Ew, gross no.” I made a face at the thought.

He didn’t say anything after that and I shrugged off his curiosity as I took out my books for next lesson. As I shut my locker door, my books were taken out of my arms.

My head whipped around to see them in Luke’s possession. “Give me my books back, Luke. I have to get to class.”

He didn’t move to give them back, but held them by his side. “What’s your next class?

I rose an eyebrow at him. “Why?”

“Can you just tell me what your god damn next class is instead of answering my question with a question?” He bit back.

I pursed my lips, but didn’t say anything in retaliation and stalked off down the hall in the direction of my next class – assuming that Luke would follow me.

I heard footsteps and soon felt a presence beside me. We walked in silence – it wasn’t awkward – but it was silent nevertheless. Once we stood outside the door to my next class, I turned to retrieve my books from him, but he pulled them behind him. I looked up at him in annoyance. “I need my books, Luke.”

Guess what appeared on his lips? That stupid, infamous smirk of his. “Looks like we do have a class together, sweetheart.”

My eyes widened at his confession. “This is an advanced writing class. You like writing?” I couldn’t help but voice my surprise.

“Don’t look too surprised, sweetheart. When you spend a long time in an institution with not much to do, you find something to do.” He simply said.

I was at a loss for words and slightly in awe.

Luke offered me a small smile. A smile! It may have been small, but it was still a smile and not that dumb smirk of his. “I think we should head inside before the bell rings.” He placed the hand that wasn’t holding my books on the small of my back and nudged me towards the door.

I snapped out of my daze and quickly walked into the room. Just as Luke made it through the door did the late bell ring and thirty or so pairs of eyes had been set on us. I blushed under my classmates’ stares and quickly made my way to my desk with Luke trailing behind me.

I took my seat and Luke placed my books on the table just as our teacher called his name

Luke stood up straight and looked over at her. “Yeah?”

“You can take the seat at that table with Y/N.” She informed him.

“Sure thing” Luke turned to me with a smirk and walked behind me to sit at the empty chair on my left. His right eye dropped in a quick wink, before he leaned over slightly to whisper, “Aren’t you just a lucky thing today?”

I could practically feel the death glares aimed at me and I shifted in my seat. “Lucky? I’m sure if looks could kill, I’d be dead twenty times over!” I hissed.

Luke raised his head and I watched as his eyes narrowed before gazing at our classmates who all quickly went back to what they were doing. He gazed back down at me and he gave me that small smile of his again. “I’m pretty sure I resurrected you.”

I let out a small laugh. “Thanks, I guess.”

Our teacher called for the class’ attention which made me look away from Luke and towards the front of the classroom.

I was writing down the notes she had put up when I felt Luke’s arm press against mine. I didn’t glance at him as I felt his breath on my hair.

“You should laugh more often, sweetheart. It suits you.” He spoke lowly into my ear.

I blushed but didn’t say anything as he returned to his normal posture, but kept his arm pressed against mine.

####

“No way! He said that?!” Cami practically shouts as she slapped at my arm.

“Okay. One, ow!” I tell her as I rub my arm. “Two, it’s not that big a deal.” I finish as I put the things I needed to take home in my backpack.

“Um, hello? Are you that ignorant? He gave you a compliment and you’re not even phased by it. Have you forgotten that this is Luke Hemmings that we’re talking about!” She gushed.

“Yeah, sweetheart. I’m not just any guy.”

Ah, speaking of the delinquent.

I looked over to my left to see Luke leaning against the neighboring locker. “Do you have nothing better to do?”

Luke shrugged. “I could be doing you.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

I scrunched my nose in disgust. “I’d rather you not.”

He laughed nonchalantly. “Your loss.”

I shut my locker door. “Not much of a loss. I think I’ll live.”

“Feisty today, are we?”

“Only when it comes to you.”

“Well, don’t I feel special.”

I rolled my eyes and turned to Cami who had remained silent during our bickering and watched us in amusement. “Can we go?”

“I don’t know. Are you two done flirting?” She asked in a teasing voice.

I gaped at her. “Flirting? No. Now way in hell.”

“Well, I think that’s a bit extreme, sweetheart.”

I spun around to glare at him. “Not even in the slightest.”

He placed a hand over his heart and looked at me with a fake hurt expression. “You wound me, sweetheart.”

I smiled sweetly at him. “Good.” Then I spun back around to Cami. “Let’s go.”

####

“I can’t believe him! He’s just so…ugh!” I say frustrated as I pace in front of my bed.

“So ‘ugh’?” Cami asks in an amused tone as she lounges on my bed eating a bag of chips.

I turned to glare at her. “Not funny.”

She shrugged. “I don’t see why you’re so angry.”

“Why am I so angry? Really?”

“Yeah. What has he done to make you so angry at him?”

“Hmm. Let’s see. He keeps annoying me and hasn’t left me alone since he’s come back from military school.”

“But it’s not like he’s doing anything really bad to you.”

She gave me a look. “You know what I mean. Did he do something to you before he left for military school?”

I remained silent which made Cami put the bag of chips aside and sit up to look at me.

“Did he?” She pressed.

I closed my eyes as the memory surfaced in my head. “Yeah, but I don’t think he knows about it.”

Cami looked confused. “How wouldn’t he know about it?”

I opened my eyes to look at her. “It was more so indirect.”

“What do you mean?”

I sat down on the end of my bed. “Remember sophomore year where he and his friends did that prank on Brian?”

She nodded.

“Remember how all of my final projects were ruined that day and I almost had to repeat sophomore year?”

Her eyes widened. “He did that?”

I nodded. “I was walking behind Jack when they ambushed him. So, they got me and two other people around him. I never wanted to cry so much I my life but I held myself together. I scavenged what I could of my projects while Luke and his friends followed Brian down the hallway. I remember Jack coming to my aid and bad mouthing Luke and his friends. That’s the day we became friends.”

Cami looked thoughtful. “Who knew that Jack could have been so helpful. What happened?”

I laughed. “He’s been around your ass for way too long.”

She nodded. “True.”

We were both silent for a minute before she asked the question I had been anticipating.

“Why are you still holding a grudge against him? It’s been two years.”

I looked at her. “All I ever wanted from him was an apology, Cam. I spent so much time on those projects only for them to be ruined and almost made me repeat the tenth grade. The least I deserve is an apology.

“Maybe you should confront him about it.” Cami suggested.

I immediately shook my head. “No way.”

“Why not? I’m sure he’s probably curious as to why you hate him so much.”

I huffed. “I doubt it.”

####

“Sweetheart,” a voice sang to my left.

I ignored him and continued to exchange my books. “I’m not in the mood, Hemmings.”

“Who pissed in your Cheerios this morning?”

I shut my locker and face him. “Har, har.” I say sarcastically before stalking past him.

“Y/N. Wait up!” He called before appearing beside me, keeping my pace. “We have class together next. I thought we could walk together.”

“You’re already doing that.” I point out.

Luke moved to stand in front of me, blocking my path. “What’s your problem, Y/N?”

“Move, Luke.” I say as I tried stepping around him but he side-stepped to block me. “We’re gonna be late.”

“I don’t care. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Let’s go.”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

I looked up at him and faltered. “I-I-”

“Y/N!” A voice boomed.

___________________________________________________

[kpsoa97xs-blog]

Average 600cc Sportbike Insurance in Canada?????

Average 600cc Sportbike Insurance in Canada?????

I am 21 and have Full G license for 5 years and M2 license for one year. Clean record and thinking of purchasing a brand new bike of 600cc for around $10000. What do you recken my insurance be approximetaly??????????? Thank You for your replies........

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :insurecostfinder.xyz

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[apsbicepstraining]

From dream to nightmare: when your sperm donor has secrets

Having a newborn by sperm donation is an intensely personal and emotional process. So what happens when you discover that interested donors has a genetic health agitation?

Sperm donor 9623 searched good on paper. An IQ of 160. A bachelors-at-arms degree in neuroscience, a masters in artificial intelligence, en route to a PhD in neuroscience engineering. A joy for crystallography, algorithm and fitness. Ontario couple Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins thought they had obtained the perfect parent for their baby.

Seven times after their son was carry, Collins and Hanson discovered that donor 9623 was a college dropout with schizophrenia, a egocentric personality disorder and a criminal record. He had spent eight months in prison for burglary, and 10 years on probation.

The sperm bank had inadvertently included the donors refer, Christian Aggeles, in an email to the couple. A Google search did the residual. His stepfather had vouched in court that Aggeless psychotic chapters embarked aged 19, well before he started donating in Georgia. Aggeless sperm led to the birth of at least 36 children worldwide.

It was like a dream shifted nightmare in an instant, said Collins. The couple, alongside at least three other lineages, have filed suits against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation, which too afforded sperm to British pairs. Xytex disavows wrongdoing.

Such examples are not unique. Like Collins, Hanson and their son, numerous lineages and individuals are now coming to terms with vital information that their donors withheld.

The forks of such discoveries can be gargantuan. The most important entity to me is[ my son] potentially facing a extremely debilitating life-style, Collins says. I felt like I was hoaxed by Xytex and I flunked my son for having opted Xytex. In hindsight, a hitchhiker on the side of the road would have been a far more responsible alternative for designing a child.

Lineages have filed litigations against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation. Picture: David Goldman/ AP

What level of probability do Aggeless genes consult? The structure of mental health diseases is complex. The genetic ingredient of schizophrenia, shows Professor Cathryn Lewis, prof of genetic epidemiology and statistics at Kings College London, is not a single gene, but is compounded across many genes. There are likely to be thousands of inherited variants that verify peril of schizophrenia. Each change somewhat increases or declines our jeopardy, but none of them alone will enable us to predict whether someone is likely to develop schizophrenia.

Even arousing brand-new findings in the C4 gene expect careful interpretation. Its a single piece in a large genetic jigsaw riddle, Lewis says. Testing one gene tells us anything about private individuals risk of developing schizophrenia.

Mental health conditions too manifest a mix of interacting environment and social causes. Not to mention that many people with schizophrenia respond to treatment and live full, productive lives.

Donor anonymity was abolished in the UK in 2005. Donor-conceived offspring are now legally entitled, at the age of 18, to information on their donors identity. Nonetheless, this was not retrospectively exerted: those imagined before April 2005( thats 21,000 people born between 1991 and 2004 alone) cannot identify their donor unless interested donors steps forward willingly. Some are never even told they were donor-conceived in the first place.

Tyler Blackwell discovered as a boy in Maryland that he has 35 half-siblings. His second astonish: using the same condition that his donor leader, John( not his real mention) has not been able to uncovered. Johns sister received the Blackwells through a family genealogy website. It transpired that John, who had not replied to their mail, had an aortic aneurysm, which had ruptured at the age of 43. He had existed. At least three other family members were similarly altered. Tyler appreciated a cardiologist as a precaution, was diagnosed with an aneurysm and underwent surgery. Without an operation on an aneurysm of this kind, the mortality from severance is up to 97%. When sever arises, patients often die within six hours. There is no one who knew about it, said his mother of the sperm bank committed. If I could foretell the future, I would have picked a different donor.

Financial motivations could underlie some instances of deception. Nonetheless, the UKs Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority ( HFEA ) defines the limit for sperm donors at 35 per clinic visit and egg donors at 750 per hertz of subscription, plus expenses. These limits, it territory, is also intended to reward altruism and depres compulsion. Rules vary internationally. One California cryobank repays your time and expenditures with compensation of up to $1,500/ month with periodic motivations such as movie tickets or talent credentials for additional meter and exertion expended by participants.

Danish sperms donor 7042 unwittingly passed on neurofibromatosis to at least 11 of his children, after his sperm was used in clinics across the US, Canada, Belgium, Greece, Spain, Thailand and the UK. Neurofibromatosis is associated with mentality and nerve cancers, bone deformities, visual impairment, high blood pressure and discover difficulties. Offspring have a 50% threat of acquiring it. Denmark has since mandated that donor sperm can be used in a maximum of 12 inseminations. In the UK , no more than 10 houses can be created using egg or sperm from a single donor. Donated eggs are not risk-free, but sperm donors typically have more offspring who can pass on inherited preconditions to the next generation.

There is no such thing as reproduction without gamble. Here i am, however, an ethical responsibility towards the child to be imagined and their hopeful parents. If a donor develops a genetic circumstance times after donation, “were not receiving” structure at present that executes disclosure.

Donors now must measure negative for HIV, hepatitis B and C, and syphilis, with farther screening be a primary consideration in ethnicity such as cystic fibrosis in those of Caucasian ancestry and sickle-cell sicknes in African and Afro-Caribbean populations. Guidelines state that potential donors should be assessed for ailments with a genetic component cleave palate, spina bifida, congenital nature malformations, psychosis and others but that decisions on eligibility should be individualised.

These screening regulations do not always apply to the unknown number of UK citizens who travel abroad to find donors, utilization unlicensed clinics or buy home-insemination paraphernaliums online. Although psychological evaluation is required by most international authorities, this will not bar donors who have not yet developed evidences of a serious mental health issues disorder. For them, the diagnostic implement is time.

Genetic screening is more cheap and comprehensive than ever before. So, should we turn away from the donors account and towards the laboratory? Allan Pacey, professor of andrology at the University of Sheffield, is distrustful. I fantasize the perfect genome probably doesnt prevail, so its truly a question of where the line should be drawn. Only about 4% of all those who come forward to be sperm donors are admitted. If we were to impose a whole new change of exclusion criteria based on theoretical threats, it is possible there wont be any sperm donors at all.

Frozen sperm stored in a sperm bank. Image: monkeybusinessimages/ Getty Images/ iStockphoto

With improved screening, donors might be diagnosed with genetic ailments that would have remained undiscovered for ever, or are untreatable. Perhaps there is an controversy for not knowing.

Kevin, who were working in photography in London, is not just a donor-conceived person but a donor himself. He believes that prospective mothers should know as much as possible about the donors medical history. But there is a level where you have to draw the line, and say were no longer causing designer babies here, he adds.

He understands the distress of Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins, yet concern about speaking too much into particular case. Its a shame if parties tell it overshadow the industry and take it to be some sort of wide-reaching fraud. It is one floor. Every daytime there are lots of children being born to couples who have fertility problems and thats much more important to remember.

Eleven offspring have been born from his gifts. Why did he donate? I wouldnt be here if someone hadnt donated. Soul did that and thats why I am here.

Jess Cresswell discovered aged 28 that she was donor-conceived. Seven years later, she still does not know who her biological father is, but appears her parents established her best available life we are able to. Since some of her own family medical record is missing, how does she feel about donor screening?

I think they should be screened but I also considered that, just because they have some kind of hereditary condition, they shouldnt necessarily be excluded. Its the parents discretion; some people would rather have a child knowing theres a risk of picking something up than not, if that was their alone option.

It is now easier than ever for donor-conceived parties to find their genetic house. The US Donor Sibling Registry has helped connect more than 10,900 parties with their half-siblings and/ or their donors. Nearly 70% of those who sign up match with a biological relative, and virtually 80% of these working groups pair instant. The UK has a Donor Sibling Link site.

Direct-to-consumer genetic tests have revolutionised this room. In 2005, a 15 -year-old moved a saliva sample to an online service, had his genetic code uploaded, use a tracking website and met his biological father 10 weeks later. Kevin met a half-sister through a donor-sibling registry and two half-siblings through parentage places. He later unwittingly discovered some of his donors items. Two hours on, Google divulged his donors epithet. The two have since stayed in contact.

One last occasion: Aggeles received mental health therapy and picked up a degree in cognitive discipline two decades after he firstly registered at university. He is now working on a masters in artificial intelligence.

The post From dream to nightmare: when your sperm donor has secrets appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

from WordPress http://ift.tt/2jbB4t9 via IFTTT

[apsbicepstraining]

From dream to nightmare: when your sperm donor has secrets

Having a newborn by sperm donation is an intensely personal and emotional process. So what happens when you discover that interested donors has a genetic health agitation?

Sperm donor 9623 searched good on paper. An IQ of 160. A bachelors-at-arms degree in neuroscience, a masters in artificial intelligence, en route to a PhD in neuroscience engineering. A joy for crystallography, algorithm and fitness. Ontario couple Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins thought they had obtained the perfect parent for their baby.

Seven times after their son was carry, Collins and Hanson discovered that donor 9623 was a college dropout with schizophrenia, a egocentric personality disorder and a criminal record. He had spent eight months in prison for burglary, and 10 years on probation.

The sperm bank had inadvertently included the donors refer, Christian Aggeles, in an email to the couple. A Google search did the residual. His stepfather had vouched in court that Aggeless psychotic chapters embarked aged 19, well before he started donating in Georgia. Aggeless sperm led to the birth of at least 36 children worldwide.

It was like a dream shifted nightmare in an instant, said Collins. The couple, alongside at least three other lineages, have filed suits against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation, which too afforded sperm to British pairs. Xytex disavows wrongdoing.

Such examples are not unique. Like Collins, Hanson and their son, numerous lineages and individuals are now coming to terms with vital information that their donors withheld.

The forks of such discoveries can be gargantuan. The most important entity to me is[ my son] potentially facing a extremely debilitating life-style, Collins says. I felt like I was hoaxed by Xytex and I flunked my son for having opted Xytex. In hindsight, a hitchhiker on the side of the road would have been a far more responsible alternative for designing a child.

Lineages have filed litigations against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation. Picture: David Goldman/ AP

What level of probability do Aggeless genes consult? The structure of mental health diseases is complex. The genetic ingredient of schizophrenia, shows Professor Cathryn Lewis, prof of genetic epidemiology and statistics at Kings College London, is not a single gene, but is compounded across many genes. There are likely to be thousands of inherited variants that verify peril of schizophrenia. Each change somewhat increases or declines our jeopardy, but none of them alone will enable us to predict whether someone is likely to develop schizophrenia.

Even arousing brand-new findings in the C4 gene expect careful interpretation. Its a single piece in a large genetic jigsaw riddle, Lewis says. Testing one gene tells us anything about private individuals risk of developing schizophrenia.

Mental health conditions too manifest a mix of interacting environment and social causes. Not to mention that many people with schizophrenia respond to treatment and live full, productive lives.

Donor anonymity was abolished in the UK in 2005. Donor-conceived offspring are now legally entitled, at the age of 18, to information on their donors identity. Nonetheless, this was not retrospectively exerted: those imagined before April 2005( thats 21,000 people born between 1991 and 2004 alone) cannot identify their donor unless interested donors steps forward willingly. Some are never even told they were donor-conceived in the first place.

Tyler Blackwell discovered as a boy in Maryland that he has 35 half-siblings. His second astonish: using the same condition that his donor leader, John( not his real mention) has not been able to uncovered. Johns sister received the Blackwells through a family genealogy website. It transpired that John, who had not replied to their mail, had an aortic aneurysm, which had ruptured at the age of 43. He had existed. At least three other family members were similarly altered. Tyler appreciated a cardiologist as a precaution, was diagnosed with an aneurysm and underwent surgery. Without an operation on an aneurysm of this kind, the mortality from severance is up to 97%. When sever arises, patients often die within six hours. There is no one who knew about it, said his mother of the sperm bank committed. If I could foretell the future, I would have picked a different donor.

Financial motivations could underlie some instances of deception. Nonetheless, the UKs Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority ( HFEA ) defines the limit for sperm donors at 35 per clinic visit and egg donors at 750 per hertz of subscription, plus expenses. These limits, it territory, is also intended to reward altruism and depres compulsion. Rules vary internationally. One California cryobank repays your time and expenditures with compensation of up to $1,500/ month with periodic motivations such as movie tickets or talent credentials for additional meter and exertion expended by participants.

Danish sperms donor 7042 unwittingly passed on neurofibromatosis to at least 11 of his children, after his sperm was used in clinics across the US, Canada, Belgium, Greece, Spain, Thailand and the UK. Neurofibromatosis is associated with mentality and nerve cancers, bone deformities, visual impairment, high blood pressure and discover difficulties. Offspring have a 50% threat of acquiring it. Denmark has since mandated that donor sperm can be used in a maximum of 12 inseminations. In the UK , no more than 10 houses can be created using egg or sperm from a single donor. Donated eggs are not risk-free, but sperm donors typically have more offspring who can pass on inherited preconditions to the next generation.

There is no such thing as reproduction without gamble. Here i am, however, an ethical responsibility towards the child to be imagined and their hopeful parents. If a donor develops a genetic circumstance times after donation, “were not receiving” structure at present that executes disclosure.

Donors now must measure negative for HIV, hepatitis B and C, and syphilis, with farther screening be a primary consideration in ethnicity such as cystic fibrosis in those of Caucasian ancestry and sickle-cell sicknes in African and Afro-Caribbean populations. Guidelines state that potential donors should be assessed for ailments with a genetic component cleave palate, spina bifida, congenital nature malformations, psychosis and others but that decisions on eligibility should be individualised.

These screening regulations do not always apply to the unknown number of UK citizens who travel abroad to find donors, utilization unlicensed clinics or buy home-insemination paraphernaliums online. Although psychological evaluation is required by most international authorities, this will not bar donors who have not yet developed evidences of a serious mental health issues disorder. For them, the diagnostic implement is time.

Genetic screening is more cheap and comprehensive than ever before. So, should we turn away from the donors account and towards the laboratory? Allan Pacey, professor of andrology at the University of Sheffield, is distrustful. I fantasize the perfect genome probably doesnt prevail, so its truly a question of where the line should be drawn. Only about 4% of all those who come forward to be sperm donors are admitted. If we were to impose a whole new change of exclusion criteria based on theoretical threats, it is possible there wont be any sperm donors at all.

Frozen sperm stored in a sperm bank. Image: monkeybusinessimages/ Getty Images/ iStockphoto

With improved screening, donors might be diagnosed with genetic ailments that would have remained undiscovered for ever, or are untreatable. Perhaps there is an controversy for not knowing.

Kevin, who were working in photography in London, is not just a donor-conceived person but a donor himself. He believes that prospective mothers should know as much as possible about the donors medical history. But there is a level where you have to draw the line, and say were no longer causing designer babies here, he adds.

He understands the distress of Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins, yet concern about speaking too much into particular case. Its a shame if parties tell it overshadow the industry and take it to be some sort of wide-reaching fraud. It is one floor. Every daytime there are lots of children being born to couples who have fertility problems and thats much more important to remember.

Eleven offspring have been born from his gifts. Why did he donate? I wouldnt be here if someone hadnt donated. Soul did that and thats why I am here.

Jess Cresswell discovered aged 28 that she was donor-conceived. Seven years later, she still does not know who her biological father is, but appears her parents established her best available life we are able to. Since some of her own family medical record is missing, how does she feel about donor screening?

I think they should be screened but I also considered that, just because they have some kind of hereditary condition, they shouldnt necessarily be excluded. Its the parents discretion; some people would rather have a child knowing theres a risk of picking something up than not, if that was their alone option.

It is now easier than ever for donor-conceived parties to find their genetic house. The US Donor Sibling Registry has helped connect more than 10,900 parties with their half-siblings and/ or their donors. Nearly 70% of those who sign up match with a biological relative, and virtually 80% of these working groups pair instant. The UK has a Donor Sibling Link site.

Direct-to-consumer genetic tests have revolutionised this room. In 2005, a 15 -year-old moved a saliva sample to an online service, had his genetic code uploaded, use a tracking website and met his biological father 10 weeks later. Kevin met a half-sister through a donor-sibling registry and two half-siblings through parentage places. He later unwittingly discovered some of his donors items. Two hours on, Google divulged his donors epithet. The two have since stayed in contact.

One last occasion: Aggeles received mental health therapy and picked up a degree in cognitive discipline two decades after he firstly registered at university. He is now working on a masters in artificial intelligence.

The post From dream to nightmare: when your sperm donor has secrets appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

from WordPress http://ift.tt/2jbB4t9 via IFTTT

[apsbicepstraining]

From dream to nightmare: when your sperm donor has secrets

Having a newborn by sperm donation is an intensely personal and emotional process. So what happens when you discover that interested donors has a genetic health agitation?

Sperm donor 9623 searched good on paper. An IQ of 160. A bachelors-at-arms degree in neuroscience, a masters in artificial intelligence, en route to a PhD in neuroscience engineering. A joy for crystallography, algorithm and fitness. Ontario couple Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins thought they had obtained the perfect parent for their baby.

Seven times after their son was carry, Collins and Hanson discovered that donor 9623 was a college dropout with schizophrenia, a egocentric personality disorder and a criminal record. He had spent eight months in prison for burglary, and 10 years on probation.

The sperm bank had inadvertently included the donors refer, Christian Aggeles, in an email to the couple. A Google search did the residual. His stepfather had vouched in court that Aggeless psychotic chapters embarked aged 19, well before he started donating in Georgia. Aggeless sperm led to the birth of at least 36 children worldwide.

It was like a dream shifted nightmare in an instant, said Collins. The couple, alongside at least three other lineages, have filed suits against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation, which too afforded sperm to British pairs. Xytex disavows wrongdoing.

Such examples are not unique. Like Collins, Hanson and their son, numerous lineages and individuals are now coming to terms with vital information that their donors withheld.

The forks of such discoveries can be gargantuan. The most important entity to me is[ my son] potentially facing a extremely debilitating life-style, Collins says. I felt like I was hoaxed by Xytex and I flunked my son for having opted Xytex. In hindsight, a hitchhiker on the side of the road would have been a far more responsible alternative for designing a child.

Lineages have filed litigations against the Georgia-based seman bank, Xytex Corporation. Picture: David Goldman/ AP

What level of probability do Aggeless genes consult? The structure of mental health diseases is complex. The genetic ingredient of schizophrenia, shows Professor Cathryn Lewis, prof of genetic epidemiology and statistics at Kings College London, is not a single gene, but is compounded across many genes. There are likely to be thousands of inherited variants that verify peril of schizophrenia. Each change somewhat increases or declines our jeopardy, but none of them alone will enable us to predict whether someone is likely to develop schizophrenia.

Even arousing brand-new findings in the C4 gene expect careful interpretation. Its a single piece in a large genetic jigsaw riddle, Lewis says. Testing one gene tells us anything about private individuals risk of developing schizophrenia.

Mental health conditions too manifest a mix of interacting environment and social causes. Not to mention that many people with schizophrenia respond to treatment and live full, productive lives.

Donor anonymity was abolished in the UK in 2005. Donor-conceived offspring are now legally entitled, at the age of 18, to information on their donors identity. Nonetheless, this was not retrospectively exerted: those imagined before April 2005( thats 21,000 people born between 1991 and 2004 alone) cannot identify their donor unless interested donors steps forward willingly. Some are never even told they were donor-conceived in the first place.

Tyler Blackwell discovered as a boy in Maryland that he has 35 half-siblings. His second astonish: using the same condition that his donor leader, John( not his real mention) has not been able to uncovered. Johns sister received the Blackwells through a family genealogy website. It transpired that John, who had not replied to their mail, had an aortic aneurysm, which had ruptured at the age of 43. He had existed. At least three other family members were similarly altered. Tyler appreciated a cardiologist as a precaution, was diagnosed with an aneurysm and underwent surgery. Without an operation on an aneurysm of this kind, the mortality from severance is up to 97%. When sever arises, patients often die within six hours. There is no one who knew about it, said his mother of the sperm bank committed. If I could foretell the future, I would have picked a different donor.

Financial motivations could underlie some instances of deception. Nonetheless, the UKs Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority ( HFEA ) defines the limit for sperm donors at 35 per clinic visit and egg donors at 750 per hertz of subscription, plus expenses. These limits, it territory, is also intended to reward altruism and depres compulsion. Rules vary internationally. One California cryobank repays your time and expenditures with compensation of up to $1,500/ month with periodic motivations such as movie tickets or talent credentials for additional meter and exertion expended by participants.

Danish sperms donor 7042 unwittingly passed on neurofibromatosis to at least 11 of his children, after his sperm was used in clinics across the US, Canada, Belgium, Greece, Spain, Thailand and the UK. Neurofibromatosis is associated with mentality and nerve cancers, bone deformities, visual impairment, high blood pressure and discover difficulties. Offspring have a 50% threat of acquiring it. Denmark has since mandated that donor sperm can be used in a maximum of 12 inseminations. In the UK , no more than 10 houses can be created using egg or sperm from a single donor. Donated eggs are not risk-free, but sperm donors typically have more offspring who can pass on inherited preconditions to the next generation.

There is no such thing as reproduction without gamble. Here i am, however, an ethical responsibility towards the child to be imagined and their hopeful parents. If a donor develops a genetic circumstance times after donation, “were not receiving” structure at present that executes disclosure.

Donors now must measure negative for HIV, hepatitis B and C, and syphilis, with farther screening be a primary consideration in ethnicity such as cystic fibrosis in those of Caucasian ancestry and sickle-cell sicknes in African and Afro-Caribbean populations. Guidelines state that potential donors should be assessed for ailments with a genetic component cleave palate, spina bifida, congenital nature malformations, psychosis and others but that decisions on eligibility should be individualised.

These screening regulations do not always apply to the unknown number of UK citizens who travel abroad to find donors, utilization unlicensed clinics or buy home-insemination paraphernaliums online. Although psychological evaluation is required by most international authorities, this will not bar donors who have not yet developed evidences of a serious mental health issues disorder. For them, the diagnostic implement is time.

Genetic screening is more cheap and comprehensive than ever before. So, should we turn away from the donors account and towards the laboratory? Allan Pacey, professor of andrology at the University of Sheffield, is distrustful. I fantasize the perfect genome probably doesnt prevail, so its truly a question of where the line should be drawn. Only about 4% of all those who come forward to be sperm donors are admitted. If we were to impose a whole new change of exclusion criteria based on theoretical threats, it is possible there wont be any sperm donors at all.

Frozen sperm stored in a sperm bank. Image: monkeybusinessimages/ Getty Images/ iStockphoto

With improved screening, donors might be diagnosed with genetic ailments that would have remained undiscovered for ever, or are untreatable. Perhaps there is an controversy for not knowing.

Kevin, who were working in photography in London, is not just a donor-conceived person but a donor himself. He believes that prospective mothers should know as much as possible about the donors medical history. But there is a level where you have to draw the line, and say were no longer causing designer babies here, he adds.

He understands the distress of Elizabeth Hanson and Angela Collins, yet concern about speaking too much into particular case. Its a shame if parties tell it overshadow the industry and take it to be some sort of wide-reaching fraud. It is one floor. Every daytime there are lots of children being born to couples who have fertility problems and thats much more important to remember.

Eleven offspring have been born from his gifts. Why did he donate? I wouldnt be here if someone hadnt donated. Soul did that and thats why I am here.

Jess Cresswell discovered aged 28 that she was donor-conceived. Seven years later, she still does not know who her biological father is, but appears her parents established her best available life we are able to. Since some of her own family medical record is missing, how does she feel about donor screening?

I think they should be screened but I also considered that, just because they have some kind of hereditary condition, they shouldnt necessarily be excluded. Its the parents discretion; some people would rather have a child knowing theres a risk of picking something up than not, if that was their alone option.

It is now easier than ever for donor-conceived parties to find their genetic house. The US Donor Sibling Registry has helped connect more than 10,900 parties with their half-siblings and/ or their donors. Nearly 70% of those who sign up match with a biological relative, and virtually 80% of these working groups pair instant. The UK has a Donor Sibling Link site.

Direct-to-consumer genetic tests have revolutionised this room. In 2005, a 15 -year-old moved a saliva sample to an online service, had his genetic code uploaded, use a tracking website and met his biological father 10 weeks later. Kevin met a half-sister through a donor-sibling registry and two half-siblings through parentage places. He later unwittingly discovered some of his donors items. Two hours on, Google divulged his donors epithet. The two have since stayed in contact.

One last occasion: Aggeles received mental health therapy and picked up a degree in cognitive discipline two decades after he firstly registered at university. He is now working on a masters in artificial intelligence.

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