#i always love when people develop a proper friendship first and then fall in love :')

[thranduel]

[lyramundana]

Hello, dear. Can you please do a scenerio where yandere Chan and yandere Hyunjin falling for the same person?

Sure thing, I'll try my best. Here you go, sweatheart 😘

YANDERE CHAN & YANDERE HYUNJIN FALLING FOR THE SAME PERSON

These men are already intense and fierce in their passion as normal people, even worse as yandere. I pity the person that has managed to get both of their attention, because Hell awaits for them.

Hyunjin is an egocentric man, very aware of the effect he has on people and enjoying every second of it. He has no problem using his good looks for his own benefit, considering that his beauty is another asset of his and so he can use it however he wants to. He gets off the power he feels when he has someone on his grasp, playing with them until he gets bored or finds someone more interesting. This doesn't prevent for secretly dreaming about finding his real love and live the idealized romance experience he visualizes in his head.

Christopher (we call him by his gouverment name here because the author finds it hot) doesn't have this much of an ego, but he's quite confident on his charms too. Like Hyunjin, he gets off the feeling of control over someone and having them squirm at his will. He's very territorial and protective with people he loves. He feels a desesperate need of be in control of everything that involves him and be in charge at any situation. He thrives off being "the leader" and having people look up to him for guidance.

As yandere, they're among the worst of the group. So if they happen to fall in love with the same person, it'll be a bloody experience.

They meet that person, let's refer to them as "Darling", either at work. Maybe Darling is a member of the staff, someone close to them, or maybe they're just a normal person they meet outside work. Regardless of the place, the love stricks them and they can't scape it. Hyunjin falls at first sight, in awe with Darling's beauty, and idealizing that person in his head before having a proper converstation. First thing he does is use his charms on them, convinced that they'll soon drawn them to him like usual, but he's shocked when Darling isn't inmediatly under his spell and treats like a regular person. This only sparks his interest more and gives him the desire to get closer to Darling, wanting to figure them out. It's during this push and pull that he falls in love, getting off the challenge of seducing someone that isn't easily impressed.

Chan needs more time to actually develop these feelings. Opposite to Hyunjin, he doesn't let appareances sway him, but he can apreaciate beauty when he sees it. It's only when he gets to know Darling on a personal level that he starts to fall. He doesn't waste time in making his move on them, but he also notices he's not the only one..

When they discover they're both after the same Darling, there's an inmediate shift on their relationship. There'll only be two outcomes: Their friendship is broken because their yandereism surpasses any friendship and other emotional bonds outside their love interest, or they make a reluctant alliance for their sake of said friendship but filled with tension. They're both extremely possessive and controlling, so they have trouble sharing, but they might find a common ground in wanting to protect that person and prefering to see them with the other rather than someone else. This latter means they'll plan together and tag team to keep you for themselves, which is actually way worse than if they fought against each other, since that'll at least distract them.

Basically, if these two are infatuated with a person, they lose any renmant of independence and freedom. Darling is locked with them, totally forbidden of going out without them. Literally, Darling is never alone. One is always beside them, clingy as they are. They're too possessive to let her stray too far, god forbid someone looks at them for too long. They have the last word on every single aspect of Darling's life. They'll eventually become a compliant doll, only there to follow their wishes and please them. Forget any friendships and relatives, Darling belongs to them now, in body and soul. Hyunjin punishes Darling for interacting with other people without their consent, while Christopher easily intimidates anyone to stay away from Darling or straight up gets rid of them.

No phone, no going out, Darling can't even dress by themselves. They become less of a human being and more like a pet. If they speak, it can only be things they want to hear and never something remotely negative. Hyunjin is prone to be dellusional, in the way that he can dellude himself into believing this is a perfect romance and Darling is truly in love, but Christopher is more realistic and is aware that this is all wrong. He just doesn't care as long as he can keep Darling in his grasp and only for his eyes.

In short, as much as I love these men, I won't wish be in this position for my worst enemy.

[bengiyo]

Gav and Cai Hira and Kiyoi Teh and Oh

aka my top 3 and TanBun or KornKnock for the grown and sexy

Absolutely zero chill. Four pairs?? I think you're just gonna get me firing from the hip.

Gavreel and Cairo

When it comes to BL, the Philippines won when it came to tackling how the pandemic affected connection and romance. I really like presentation of developing a crush on a streamer and just going for it with these two. I'm still waiting for my proper gamers BL, but this is a good first outing.

I think what I like so much about what we got from these two is how temporary so much of their lives feels. They want to be together. They want to commit. However, life won't let them. Gav can't stay here and be okay because he's running out of money and honestly isn't that well right now. Cairo is still grieving his dad, and he has a lot of growing up to do.

They're one of the rare pairs that I want to be together in the future who I am glad are forced to take a break when we see them part.

Hira and Kiyoi

I think the best thing about this show and this pairing was the reveal that Kiyoi was also obsessed with Hira from the moment their eyes first locked. I also really like that Kiyoi is a bottom who wants it.

We've been lucky with these two that we got to see them three times, and I like how much stronger Yagi has gotten as an actor each time, and how Hagiwara has grown as a creator and storyteller. These two seem to really understand that they have two characters who struggle to say what's necessary to each other in a way that reaches the other.

I loved in Season 2 when Kiyoi realized that Hira was still worshiping him as a god and freaked the fuck out about it, storming out of the house. That he was in the living room the next morning waiting for Hira to come and talk to him, only to get annoyed again was perfect. We get fairly decent payoff for Hira finally facing his own ego when it comes to Kiyoi in the movie, and these two remain among my favorites.

Also, Yagi Yusei really is that beautiful.

Teh and Oh

I just know if I was part of MoRaoYuLok I would have a side chat where we just bitched about these two.

Teh is such an asshole sometimes, and Oh is really so patient with his nonsense. I always lament that Teh is so unsociable that he struggles to maintain a lot of friendships, and it's why that snake Jai was able to get in there and fuck up his life. Still, Teh isn't off the hook for his own shit. He's always struggled with jealousy when it comes to Oh, and he's always worried about falling behind him.

Oh is just so naturally gifted and has an irresistible natural charm. He knows he's beautiful, and he knows how people see yet, and yet he's only ever looking at Teh. We should all be so lucky.

I think about that translation scene in episode 3 of ITSAY regularly, and how that is probably one of the best moments we've ever had in BL. These two really captured a love that feels bigger than their bodies can contain.

Tan and Bun

I'll talk about Tan and Bun since it's been too long since I watched Together With Me and cannot remember them that clearly anymore.

Tan was so ridiculous this entire show, and I'll never get over Bun being ACAB as fuck the whole time. Bun never forgot that he was trying to solve this case for his bestie who they murdered, but he knew she would want him to get some ass along the way.

Tan said absolutely insane shit to Bun literally every episode. He even shot that man off a cliff. Somehow he still won. Incredible.

Send Me a Ship and I'll Share My Thoughts

[lesbian-books]

Lesbian Historical Fiction

Fingersmith by Sarah Waters

Victorian England, 1860s. A con artist hires a London pickpocket to help him obtain the fortune of a naïve heiress.

Beyond the Screen Door by Julia Diana Robertson

Washington, USA, 1945. Two best friends grow up together and start to fall in love. One of them can see ghosts, but this is not a scary book.

Cantoras by Carolina De Robertis

Uruguay, 1977. During the military dictatorship, homosexual people were persecuted, imprisoned, and tortured. Five women (three lesbians and two bisexuals) manage to find each other and cultivate a friendship that will last for decades.

Club Storyville by Riley LaShea

Virginia, USA, 1944. A girl raised to be a “proper lady” falls in love with a nurse who comes to care for her sick grandmother.

Belladonna by Anbara Salam

Italy, 1950s. An insecure teenage girl develops a toxic obsession with her beautiful and popular best friend. As the girls graduate high school and attend an art school, their relationship becomes complicated by sexual lust and secrecy.

Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley

Virginia, USA, 1959. Sarah is one of the first black students to attend her previously all-white high school. She becomes acquainted with a white student named Linda, whose father is a major opponent of desegregation.

Shaken to the Core by Jae

California, USA, 1906. Giuliana, a working class Sicilian immigrant woman, goes to work as a maid for a rich American family. The daughter of the family, Kate, is expected to marry a rich man and have children, but Kate wants to be financially independent and be with a woman. This book is set in the time period of the real life 1906 San Francisco earthquake, one of the deadliest natural disasters in U.S. history, which killed over 3000 people and destroyed most of the city.

Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malina Lo

California, USA, 1950s. A Chinese-American girl has a lesbian awakening, makes friends with another lesbian at her school, and discovers the vibrant nightlife in lesbian bars.

Matrix by Lauren Groff

England, 1150s. A young French woman named Marie is forced to go to an English convent to become the new prioress. The nuns are living in hunger and squalor when Marie arrives, and when she takes charge she transforms the fate of the convent and the lives of the nuns into something better and more successful than they could have imagined.

Click “Keep reading” for content warnings. Minor spoilers ahead.

Content warnings for Fingersmith: abuse, including child abuse

Content warnings for Beyond the Screen Door: child abuse, domestic violence

Content warnings for Cantoras: abuse, child sexual abuse, corrective rape, marital rape, suicide

Content warnings for Lies We Tell Ourselves: racist abuse. Additional note: This book does not hold back from depicting the racism and homophobia of the time. It has also been criticised for its portrayal of an oppressed person falling in love with their oppressor, and rightfully so because that aspect could have been done better, but at the same time I don’t think that lesbian relationships in books have to always be written as flawlessly healthy and morally pure, just as hetero relationships often are not. If Linda had abandoned all her racist beliefs immediately and rededicated her goals to supporting black civil rights, then the book would have been criticised for being too unrealistic, imo.

[nekrophoria]

Edgy/misc OC ask meme ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Dolores Webb

№ 2, 7, 9, 13, 14, 17,24.

Thank you for the ask <3

What's something about your OC that people wouldn't expect just from looking at them?

The most notable thing is probably that she's a bit of a metalhead, which is something that (for most people) doesn't really fit to her shy and gentle personality.

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What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?

Ufff hard to say.

Dolores didn't really have as much room to develop as she deserved yet. I've been kinda neglecting procrastinating her development a bit until she makes a proper appearance in Volatile.

When I initially created her however she started out as a replacement for an OC I scrapped a long long time ago. That OC was sort of a very plain love interest for Mel when I first started playing around in sims.

Since then Dolores devolved into more of a side Character, but at the same time she also became way more complex I'd say. She's also no longer a love interest for Mel (although she had a bit of a crush on him as a kid) That plot turned more into an introspection of her need for affection/approval in order to feel whole.

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Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

Dolores always makes me think of Creep by Radiohead (this cover version by Daniela Andrade in particular)

I would pick out a specific line but honestly the whole song perfectly describes how Dolores perceives herself in comparison to the people around her in my opinion.

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If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

Most definitely. Dolores reminds me quite a bit of how I used to be as a teenager, I have a lot of sympathy for her. And she's just a super sweet and kind person and very easy to get along with, if you don't mind her insecurities and her being a bit of a hermit, so I wouldn't see how we could not get along.

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How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?

She just wants to be liked and cared about, plain and simple. To her people showing any sort of aversion towards her is pretty unbearable so she tends to be a bit of a people pleaser, but yeah, she mostly just wants people to perceive her favorably.

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What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise

So many things honestly...but mostly her school time. She was a victim of bullying throughout most of it and never really had any friends, aside from Mel for a short time in elementary school, who dropped the friendship once they went to different schools leaving her completely alone.

Another thing would be her generally being emotionally neglected by most people in her life and never getting the appreciation and affection from people that she deserved as a child.

Also having the two of people she ever really had feelings for fall in love with each other. But that one hasn't happened yet in the story so I'm not sure if it counts ^^"

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What is an alternative life path your OC might have gone down? How different would their life be if they'd made those decisions?

I never really thought about that to be honest.

To be fair, the way her life turned out up to this point wasn't really down to her or her decisions, quite the contrary I think. But...i think if her life circumstances could've been better, if her mother never got ill (which was the main reason she spent a couple of years in a children's home on and off) and she could have grown up in an environment with a better support system, it would have allowed her to become a more self assured and possibly happy version of herself, but she also wouldn't have any connections to my other characters, hence she wouldn't be part of the story.

Apart from that I don't really see many ways in which her life could've been that different.

[ellestra]

Better without action scenes

I waited a week to write down my thoughts about the Secret Invasion and I'm still not sure what they are. There were moments when I almost liked the show but then they were instantly squandered by some baffling and incomprehensible decisions.

It's one of those shows so hellbent on keeping its viewers guessing it becomes impossible to either track or care what is happening.

Peple concentrate on the things like bad CGI or boring fights but the truth is bad special effects never really stop people from engaging with a story (see Doctor Who or puppet shows). You will suspend disbelief if you want as long as the story is engaging enough. As long as you follow emotional journeys and plotlines. When they become all scrambled by trying to shock the viewer it all falls apart.

MCU uses to be really good at remembering that but recently they are slacking. It becomes an exercises of going from one cool idea to another cool idea but the connection between them seems to drawn by crayons.

Like everything between Fury and his wife was great. The history between them, the love, the hurt, the distrust and the longing was played beautifully and it was easy to believe it was always there throughout MCU even if we saw her the first time in second episode of this series.

Same with Talos when you can feel both the decade long friendship and all the times it failed. And generally a lot of word battles work great Fury with Rhodey and with Grvik and with Sonia (even if the final one is undermined by it not being Fury there).

But then you have everything that fails and most of it is plot. The need to keep us guessing leads to lack of proper set up of many of the plot points and then half of them is just dropped or leads to nothing. Like Skrull Council was pointless, so was New Skrullos, and so were the deaths in the end. The show introduces characters that seem important but they get couple of scenes that were so underwhelming you ask why even waste time on them - Pagan, Beto, Sonya's boss (what a waste of Tony Curran - again) etc.

What was the point of the rebellion against Gravik beside death of all those Skrulls he recruited? I'm sure the idea was something about him also selling false promises and then disposing of people he used just like he says Fury does but the show did absolutely nothing to sell it. Also the whole plan of killing 8 billion people so 1 (one!) million Skrulls have somewhere to live is ridiculous. Just like there being no other place in universe for them. One million is so little. With Superskrulls they could've just find themselves their own Knowhere.

It's worst with G'iah who is so enigmatic a character and the show tries to keep so many things about her in the is she or isn't she limbo there is no real sense of why she does anything. She seems to be close to Gravik but also not. She switches side to work for her father again but doesn't believe in him (she's right - his plan is one a teenager would thought out not a gown man who saw how humanity reacts to refugees for decades). She dies, she lives, she gets superpowers and the most reaction we get to all of it is when she is with Priscilla. Both her parents are dead. Everyone she believed in failed her and you can barely tell what she thinks about it. Or what she wants. She's just there. And I'm not blaming Emilia Clarke for it. I blame the show for trying to hide so much about her she ends up with no character at all.

They try to shock us with death of important characters like 4-5 times (Rhodey doesn't really count I suppose) with like half of those being fake out but instead of being shocked I ended up being just angry. Neither loss of Maria Hill nor Talos really did that much to make the story more poignant. It didn't even do that much for Fury's character development (his talks to Varra were much better at this). It all just left bad taste in my mouth. And the constant so who is really dead dead didn't help either. And the show doesn't properly emotionally engage with those deaths so neither do ewe as viewers.

For me the most ridiculous isn't the big battle but when Fury changes clothes in the mausoleum. It supposed to be this badass moment of him regaining his mojo or something but it just underwhelming. Like the whole show.

The less said about Ritson the better.

In the end my favourite parts where the ones with Olivia Coleman. This show justified its existence by introducing Sonya Falsworth and I'm actually looking forward to her and G'iah working together in the future.

[little-puku]

Meet Sugi and Baby Nary!!

I love how they have turned out, it took me a lil bit to be happy with their designs and some details her personality but now I do love her! haha anyway here is some info about her: 

Sugi comes from the Johto region, she has an older brother and is a single mother. Sugi is a sweet and kindhearted person, but she also has a very overprotective/”mother hen” personality, she means good but sometimes it can be a lil bit to much for some people since she always want to bring the best potential of everyone, she also tends to get into heated arguments with others over the proper care of Pokémon (this due to her been a Pokémon breeder and having a deep respect and love for all living creatures)

She used to work with professor Elm as a researcher about Pokémon breeding, unusual Pokémon Abilities, disease eradication and how the new borns learn different types of moves. She is also part of the Pokémon Preservation Council 

She retire because of her pregnancy but still pursuing her career as a independent researcher helping Professor Elm with anything he needs, giving him all the data or Pokémon he needs to the kids that are about to start their journey

She owns now a Pokémon Day Care Center focus mainly in taking care of homeless and hurted Pokémon and giving them a new home, she is still part of The Pokémon Preservation Council focusing mainly in the protection of species in danger and their habitats, for some reason she keeps all her Pokémon in “Heal balls”, “Love balls” and “Friend balls” 

Since her knowledge of how taking care and domesticate Pokémon is very useful she works with Marie at the pastures, she shares her finding with Porfessor Laventon specially if she find an egg!  Sugi also been kind of an assistant to him reminder her of “something” she used to do (this is because when she arrived to Hisui forgot part of her memories but working at the pastures has helped her a lot to remember who she might be) 

When Sugi arrived into Hisui she was found by a Blissey, she tried to heal her since she was bleeding a lot, Blissey was worry that the baby inside of her might be in danger too since Sugi’s body was freezing. Because of that Blissey took her to the “Snowfall Hot Spring” moments later she was found by Lian, Ingo and Gaeric. Even tho Gaeric and Lian thought at first Blissey might have hurted her, Ingo explained that Blissey are kindhearted Pokémon that will always help those in need, to this day Blissey never leave Sugi side, later Blissey letting Sugi catch and join her team, Blissey loves and enjoys taking care of Nary 

After she got rescued, Calaba took her in (even tho she didn’t want at first since she was an outsider but she couldn't let someone die on her watch) and helped her slowly recover, Ingo visit her everyday to check how she was (even tho Lian and Gaeric visited sometimes too, Ingo never missed a day, same time everyday), later finding out she also speaks like him and not “Hisuian” both feeling comfort that they weren't alone, their friendship started to bloom and both feeling like they already knew each other even tho they have never seen nor know who the other one was.

This due to the fact that before both, Sugi and Ingo, fall into Hisui both where “pen pals” since childhood, meeting by “accident” because of one School activity to “write a letter to makes someone happy” for Ingo’s luck his letter ending up in Johto, both happy that made a new friend writing each other letters showing pictures of their family, friends and Pokémon. This never stopped and still into adulthood writing every week, even if they never meet in person before they knew each other their secret, the fears, their dreams, the success each one had made, everything but as the time passed both started to develop feeling for each other sadly none of them never said anything out of fear to ruin the beautiful friendship they have 

When Sugi arrived to Hisui she was already 6 month pregnant, she doesn’t remember her old partner but remembers not feeling “safe” with them, remembering she was “running away from someone or something” before everything went blank and lost most of her memories. After she recovered, Ingo took charge of taking her to Jubilife Village so she would be safe and have everything when the baby was born. Both where feeling a lil sad since both knew they won't be seen each other as often but before they arrived to Jubilife, she asked Ingo to lend her a Pokeball with this she capture a Wurmple (later evolved into a Beautifly) telling him that even tho they couldn't see each other they will write and still be in touch, she didn't know why she wanted to write letters to him but feeling comfort in the idea. Ingo agreed to it since it just feel “right” for both of them

When Nary was born, Ingo was in the Coronet Highlands assisting Lady Sneasler new hatchling, he run to Jubilife Village after Sugi’s Beautifly called for him. Ingo knowing this was a very complicated and dangerous moment for her since when they meet Calaba informed him that because of her bleeding during her pregnancy her life or the baby might be in danger so she will need special care and protection so none of them lose their life, (after that Ingo took responsibility for both of them) worried for both he run! he never run as fast as he did that day, later when he saw both his friend and the baby where fine he just felt a big weight got lifted from his shoulders, hugging her and holding both he promised to himself that he will never leave their side

As the time passed Ingo and Sugi both started to develop romantic feeling for each other, but still none of them said anything since they never acknowledged the big “Donphan” in the room main reason because they are oblivious nerds for each other feeling. This just leaving everyone frustrated because it was obvious that they have a thing for each other and have very deep romantic feeling but none making a move to make a “official” relationship

Both express their love language with light and gentle touched to each other, small gifts that reminder of the other person, listen to the other for whatever they need and talking about how their day went. Sugi on the other hand, she tries to be a lil bit more subtle but failing at it because she just loves to pamper those who she loves in this case cooking for the other person, giving big hugs and showing a lot of support and proud on what they do and most importantly small lil cheek kisses

Ingo sometimes ask her about strategies for the path of solitude (sometimes he just needs to ramble about the ideas to be clear he is in the right track), Sugi loves to help him and assist him if he needs a specific Pokémon for those battles 

Sometimes they hang out and bring gifts to each other, one of their favorite activities been them looking at the stars. This is because both feel a specific pair of start reminder them to those they “need to remember” but also because they feel those they need to remember are also looking at the same pair of stars 

Sugi deeply loves Nary, always trying to make her smile and trying to make her as healthy as possible so she doesn’t fall sick. She made a plushie based on a Pokémon she remembers (this one been a Mareep)

Sugi is also pretty good at making weird faces to make her kid laugh 

Sugi also cares deeply for those she consider a family or friends, but most importantly the kids that are also “outsiders”. She knows how hard might be for them for having such a big responsibility of them helping Akari to her big mission on completing the Pokédex, but also them not been able to be with their families so she always tried to make them feel at “home” 

Bebe Nary, loves her Mareep’s plushie and enjoys hagging out with a bebe Sneasel, she loves to eat and explore, calls Ingo “dada” loves the others kids and her mom. Each person she knows has a “nickname”

Because Nary call Ingo “dada” (Which makes him a lil embarrassed same as Sugi but both are cool with it, since is not harming anyone) people think he is the father even tho they see they don’t look nothing alike so sometimes leaving this to “gossip” 

[slutdropintohell]

Why a Shizuo Gaiden would be the best thing to happen ever

First of all, Shizuo’s character holds immense potential - much of which has not even been touched on insofar. His inner desire for peace and the way it contrasts his outward tendency to use violence when he encounters any problem or conflict is absolutely fascinating, and the dilemma that comes with wanting a quiet life and lacking the ability to regulate emotion (combined with superhuman strength) leaves SO much room for character exploration. Shizaya aside, Izaya and Shizuo have a very unique dynamic and they compliment one another so well that it would be a waste to throw that all away. I personally don’t like their final fight - it seems like lazy writing to me. Some may argue that it had to happen and a final fight was the logical conclusion of their rivalry, however this argument fails to consider the fact that neither Izaya nor Shizuo receive any valuable character development as a result of their fight. It is a lazy way of ‘completing’ their respective character arcs (which are inherently intertwined), and doesn’t provide us with any nuance or insight into their character. Izaya’s psyche has been explored in detail and he always seems to come across as the more ‘interesting’ or ‘mysterious’ one, I don’t personally believe this to be true however I can’t deny that he has received more substance in terms of the way that his psychology is explored throughout the series. This is definitely exacerbated by the fact that Izaya has received multiple spin off novels, therefore developing and exploring his character further. Shizuo certainly has complexities, and it wouldn’t be fair to say that he has been completely neglected, however I think there’s a lot that has been left unsaid, many questions unanswered, and a Gaiden would really help to flesh out his character a little more. I’m totally aware that what I’m about to say falls under the category of wishful thinking - however, I’d love to see Shizuo ans Izaya meet again. They have both grown since their fight, Izaya was able to accept that he lost because of his refusal to see Shizuo as human. Equally, Shizuo discusses the possibility of a friendship between him and Izaya with Celty, and although it is in retrospect, that is not something he would even dream of thinking years ago. They have developed and grown as people, and it would be truly fascinating to see a reunion between the two because, whether or not I think it will happen, i do believe that they could become friends or at least acquaintances. The seeds have been sewn, and while it is possible that Narita is utilising these attitudes as a means of character development alone, it still suggests that there is potential for a reunion. Unfortunately, I doubt that Narita has the balls to commit to a romantic narrative, especially since he has shown objective homophobia in the novels - it is likely that their reunion will be platonic. That is, if we get one at all. Shizuo holds a lot of anger at his strength, which manifests into a degree of self loathing because of his inability to control himself. The crux of his character arc is centred around the fact that he isn’t able to keep his anger to a manageable level. This is something that he needs to deal with before there is a possibility of opening up and truly letting others in. Learning to use his strength for good and channeling his anger in a constructive way is the development we need to see, but what we have been given so far is unsatisfactory. I don’t think that Shizuo’s ‘flaws’ must be totally corrected or addressed in order for his arc to be complete, since everyone is flawed to some degree (especially in Durarara) however it would be great to see him progress and develop in the areas that cause him the most pain. If we want to see a proper reunion between Izaya and Shizuo, Shizuo will need to mature in certain areas and gain more control over his abilities - else he will end up slipping back into his old ways. Thank you for listening to my insane ramblings once again but I just wanted to share some thoughts on why I’d love to see a Shizuo Gaiden

[stargayzingidiot]

My thoughts about Fate: The Winx Saga season two:

- my overall faves this season: Terra, Stella, Grey, Beatrix, Flora, and Aisha

- loved the Stella and Beatrix friendship

- was surprised by Terra being queer but I’m not at all mad about it. I loved her coming out scenes and how they were all so supportive of her. Although I’m not sure I liked the way they handled her interest in Kat. Like, did Kat just suddenly forget about her girlfriend during Terra’s inspirational speech?

- I’m sorry but Sky’s and Bloom’s relationship and some parts of their storylines just bore me so incredibly much. I just don’t really care about them okay

- Bloom and Beatrix are similar in that they both search for answers about where they came from but their moral compasses diverge. Beatrix doesn’t hesitate when selling someone out to get what she wants, but she doesn’t directly endanger those she cares about, and she’s good at seeing the whole picture (the way she knew to stop Sebastian to ensure the safety of the Otherworld) They’re both a bit selfish in their search for answers and Bloom definitely doesn’t always think things through. I feel like Beatrix is what Bloom could have been and I’m sorry but I just think she’s much more interesting

- I don’t like the way Bloom is always like ‘I have the dragon flame, I’m the only one powerful enough to stop this, let me go alone’. Like first of all, they are trying to help you, you dumbass. Second of all, have some faith in them, they ended up saving the day and you.

- Another ship opinion that is most likely unpopular; I don’t ship nor do I want Riven and Musa together. Sorry. I know people are rooting for them bc of their relationship in the animated show, but I don’t like them together. I feel like it’s only fanservice and I don’t like how they’re just throwing away Sam for it to happen.

- Terra had every right to be mad at Musa. She told her that it was a bad idea to take away peoples’ emotions but she did it anyway (I understand why she did it but that doesn’t excuse it). Musa was part of the reason why her dad and brother had to leave

- on the other hand, Musa also had every right to be mad at Terra when she kept pushing for her to get her powers back. I just wish Musa would have talked to Terra about it

- what the hell was up with the outfit choice for Terra during the banquet? I was so disappointed. It was essentially a fucking pajamas. Let her wear clothes that fit her for fucks sake! And don’t try to tell me it was bc she wasn’t going to the party bc why would Stella be painting her nails when she had to get ready herself too if it wasn’t to help Terra get ready as well?

- I hated that only Bloom got to hug Farah goodbye. Musa literally told Stella, Aisha, and Terra to give her a hug from her, implying that they’d all get to hug her goodbye. But then she disappeared right after Bloom hugged her.

- the transformation scene was rushed and the fight with Sebastian lost its impact bc of that. I wish we had gotten a scene where the girls sat together and tried to transform without luck bc they all had trouble embracing all their emotions. That way it would have been so much more epic when they finally did transform during the fight. They should have been fighting without transforming first and then when they were losing they should have finally transformed. There, I said it

What I’m hoping for next season if there’s gonna be one:

- more focus on the friendships! I feel like it’s a bit too focused on all the romantic relationships right now

- although, I want Terra and Dane to have a proper development of their relationships. We’ve seen the straight couples fall in love during the two seasons with specific storylines focused on them. But the only queer couples got a couple of scenes and boom they were in relationships (that feels a bit *cough* homophobic)

- I feel like they’re gonna bring Beatrix back and I’m overjoyed at that. But I also want to see Stella grieve and talk to her friends about it

- I want Terra and Riven to figure their shit out and become friends again. They could be such an iconic and badass duo. I am begging Netflix to please let them be friends

- I know Bloom is the main character but I kinda want it to be less the Bloom show and more the Winx show. Please and thank you

- I want better outfits for Terra specifically, and I want different outfits when they transform and not only wings

Yeah I think that’s it

[astertimberwolf]

I want to talk about something that happened to me many, many years ago, but that still affects me to this day.

I had no voice / wasn't allowed to speak up back then, and I still feel invalidated in my experience, by what some people assumed of me and labeled me as, which was based on stereotypes of modern pop-culture definitions of psychological disturbances and behaviors.

I want to talk about my time as a(n unknowingly) neurodivergent (autistic and ADHD) lesbian in highschool, in a country that used to be both homophobic and ignorant about mental health issues.

I was a teenager, aged 16.

I had already been through a fair amount of bullying in schools at this point in my life, because I acted and functioned differently from everyone else around me.

This had already rooted a deep sense of mistrust and social anxiety in me when trying to befriend people, as I was 100% experiencing developmental delays in relation to my social skills... partially also due to parental neglect / lack of proper parental (and professional) support / guidance.

I would also like to point out that our high school was sh*t when it came to mental health support. We did not have access to any professionals, and the only free, state-funded psychologists I was able to see outside of school ranged from creepy and downright incompetent, to mediocre at best.

Before I go into more detail about the situation I got myself into, I want to briefly introduce what my autism entails and how it makes me come across.

I have a form of right-brain autism where I am both blessed and cursed with an overly active, vivid imagination, which, at times, has been the source of great suffering due to some delusions and dissociative states it induced in me. The same right-brain autism also caused any and all of the emotions I ever experienced (and still experience to this day) to be 100 times more intense than normal (or at least, it felt like that back then, as I had no way to control them or manifest them in a healthy way).

Additionally, this made me somewhat good at arts and drawing, but to a limited degree, since I only possess a type of semi-eidetic memory (not fully photographic), where I can easily map out 3D spaces, images, environments and sometimes even people to an accurate degree in my own head (hence also why I never get / got lost), but I digress...

...The most unhealthy coping mechanism I had, directly resulting from this braintype, was this dissociative state where I retreated into my own head and imagination, as it was the only place where I felt like I could be myself, and express myself safely without facing any kind of judgement.

It was originally a response to trauma that led me to retreat a lot into this inner world, but it soon turned into an addiction of sorts (especially after I figured out I could trigger it by listening to music I enjoyed) whenever I felt (sensory- emotionally or mentally) overwhelmed by situations that were completely out of my control, irrepairable / unfixable or that I simply did not know how to react to, or handle.

Alongside this, I had a high degree of social ineptitude, and a speech and expression-related disability that would make me say things in a completely wrong way whenever I reacted emotionally and didn't carefully pay attention to every word I said or wrote. It has (in the past) caused many misunderstandings, as well as made me lose friendships, since people always interpreted what I was trying to say in the worst possible way.

...

With this long preface out of the way, here is what happened: I fell head-over-heels for a classmate of mine in my second year of highschool.

It was my first time ever developing feelings that strong for someone, and believe me, if falling in love is devastating for regular, neurotypical people- for me it was an absolutely crushing and unnerving experience, like being hit by a freight train or truck at full speed, but in the emotional sense.

The trigger (reason I fell for her) was a bit of a foreign Freudian root (but I am not going to go into that right now). Something I figured out only during- and after my failed marriage, about 5-6 years ago (from the date of this post, more or less).

So, what happened that ended up traumatizing me and this girl I fell for (as far as I have gathered, from the way she reacted) all those years ago?

It's complicated.

I was labeled a stalker, a creep, a weirdo, among many other derogatory labels and assumptions. I was called a manipulator, a liar, a psychopath and an attention seeker (/ seeking wh*ore), and was even ganged up on by a bunch of her friends once. The latter was in response to an actual suicide attempt of mine (yes, I was that depressed and desperately needed help), which I was not ever intending on letting her know about... and had inadvertetly been told to her by an —at the time— online friend, who wanted to stop me from going through with it.

And where did this start?

With me confessing my feelings to her.

I wish I never f*cking did. I wish I just kept it to myself and kept my distance. It would have saved me so much pain.

That alone (confessing to her) may have already given both me, and her, some sort of anxious breakdown or half a panic attack, as we both did not react well (she went to cry in a bathroom stall, and I just sat in a corner, trying to disappear).

I just felt wrong and horrible for the entirety of the ordeal. There were classmates watching this all go down. It was downright embarrassing, and I had obviously not thought it through, since I simply had the urge to get this out and off my chest, as it had been driving me insane- keeping it all bottled up inside (I genuinely thought I was going to implode due to the intensity of the darn feelings).

Regardless of my reasons for confessing... I tried to take several steps back, and since I already had her reject me then and there, I apologised and asked if we could just be friends instead.

You can guess how badly that went- since my feelings did not just magically disappear / go away from one day to another.

I should have really just gotten as far away from her as humanly possible, but I just ended up digging an even deeper grave for myself, as she had initially agreed to trying to be friends (she was trying to be nice).

My retarded, half-delusional brain secretly hoped, at times, that by befriending me, she would change her mind about me, and it didn't help that I went to ask for advice online anonymously, and people kept suggesting I keep pursuing / chasing after her, and that she would eventually say yes and give me a chance (they probably assumed I was a guy and it's f*cked up enough that this sort of thing is reinforced / normalized as a part of cis-het culture).

I would continue to embarrass myself in numerous ways throughout the year: from being overly friendly / nice, to stealing glances at her subconsciously (as an idiot in love would do) and I was working overtime in trying to make her happy. But I could soon tell that, instead of appeasing her, I was just making her more exhausted and anxious around me. I eventually figured out (how? I cannot really recall) that she was just wearing a "mask" when she was around me, so as to avoid hurting my feelings.

This hurt me even more, ironically enough, the moment I realized she was being disingenuous (I had this whole moral rule where I believed that people should always be honest no matter what), and that wasn't even remotely the worst of it.

I sincerely did not know / realize how my behaviour was coming off to her and to everyone observing the situation- I was genuinely oblivious to my environment, or the connotation of the things I was saying, doing, or thinking.

As a socially impaired, autistic individual, who grew up with 5 cats and few and in-between socialization attempts with peers my age, I tended to overshare. I loved her, therefore I trusted her and I ended up telling her about all my past trauma, about sexual assaults and other really personal stuff that happened when I was just a kid- things I really just needed to keep to myself.

Sharing all of that was another huge mistake- because it was later thrown back at me in the form of ammunition: I was accused by her friends- of manipulating and guilt-tripping her intentionally into pitying me, of all things- and this cr*p upset me more than I could ever hope to express through mere words.

Yes, I was misguided- yes, I was stupid, desperate and socially unaware, but when all this stuff came to a head, I just became increasingly more and more cripplingly depressed.

I never meant to put a mental / psychological and emotional strain on her. I never meant to let my feelings spill out like that. I never meant for anyone to get hurt... And I was just trying so hard to make things right, but the more I tried to "fix" them, the worse everything got.

The first, big, misunderstandings that occurred and led to the stalking accusations (later on) probably started when I (unknowingly) walked by her place a few times, and mentioned it in conversation. I had honestly no idea she even lived there- in that area of town, at first.

For context: I just liked walking around town at that age (aimlessly sometimes), because it helped me disconnect and dissociate from reality through my music-induced fantazising (the unhealthy coping mechanism / addiction mentioned further up).

For me, it meant that I got to explore places I had never been to before, while also spending time in my happy place- in my own head, for as long as I wanted.

In my young, naïve eyes, this was a win-win. A feel-good experience when everything else felt bad- but it didn't last.

Upon discovering that she lived in that area, the third time I took my usual walk around that part of town, I just became increasingly anxious whenever I was near the place. It felt wrong being anywhere in the proximity of that apartment complex subconsciously, and at the time, I didn't know why.

I was the kind of autistic idiot that- when facing a novel, intense emotion in a new situation (which may even have been dangerous), instead of listening to that emotion or bad gut feeling, I would try to prod at it- and try to understand it.

All I did, that one, third time, was look at the apartment complex'es entrance, walk a few steps in, then walk back, because the intensity of the dread and anxiety I was feeling were so big- they were screaming at me to turn back, which I did. I didn't ring any doorbells, or touch anything. I never, ever went back to that place.

I acted the same as a curious, but frigthened cat would, when exploring a new area, and I turned back and went away when things felt off.

But nevermind that. The damage was done. Mentioning I had been in the area a few times was enough to give her relentless paranoia and anxiety.

And that wasn't the worst of it.

She had already given me the silent (and avoidant) treatment a few times (which had sent me down a depressive hole that never seemed to have an end), but yeah... My absolutely 100% retarded and socially unaware self, still thought that it would be a good idea to try and explain myself through a multiple-pages-long apology and explanation letter*, which I stuffed in her locker because I was too socially anxious and terrified, at that point in time, to confront her in person (when she was already clearly mad at me).

*God forbid, I just remembered some of the contents of that apology and explanation letter. I partially understand why her friends thought I was trying to guilt-trip her. What happened around that time was that, since she seemed so uncomfortable with me having a crush on her, I had gotten with this one guy who seemed to be into me- partially out of pity for him on my end (that he had feelings for me when I didn't like him much, but I was in a similar situation so I idiotically decided to give him a chance, projection 101), and partially thinking this would get her to feel safe around me as a friend, and dispell any anxiety she felt- This sleazy scumbag ended up r*ping me. I don't remember the specifics of that apology, but I think I mentioned that to her- as a way to show that I cared about her comfort enough to do something that stupid (getting with someone I didn't know and didn't like, for which I paid the consequences for. It was my fault and nobody else's) and hoped this would also put an end to all of my classmates just kind of avoiding me (the grand majority of our class was made up of girls and I got avoided like the plague, hence homophobia).

There is also a faint memory of me leaving a red rose on top of that locker around Valentine's day (anonymously), but I could not place this event inside of the timeline of f*ckups I had done (or well- it's more the other way around. V-day is February, the rest is a blur) to save my life, as it has been far too long ago- and I cannot even remember if it was a real rose, cut and taken from my own garden (we had these beautiful, strongly scented / wonderful smelling wild roses that were growing at all times of the year where I lived, in a village far away from that town) or a paper one, drawn and colored by hand.

My intentions at the time were the following: I thought that an anonymous rose was going to make her happy because someone thought of her, and she did not need to know it was from me- (dumbest thing ever- hindshight is 20/20 as I eventually learnt why that would come off as creepy and stalkerish) and at first, it seemed to be the case (it seemed to work, until she found out it was from me and got justifiably pissed). I think I was just really that desperate to make her smile, at the time. To be the source of her happiness, just once.

I knew I would never get anything more than that from her at that point. I think by that time she had also gotten herself a boyfriend- a guy from our same class that I was on friendly terms with, prior to them getting together (yes, that felt like a huge backstab. He knew I liked her, and they made out in the hallway unabashedly in front of everyone). It was one of the many things that crushed me into tiny pieces, and contributed to driving me even further down the depression well.

I don't resent that guy anymore, but I did wish they would make their love escapades and make-out sessions a little less public / avoid putting on a show.

...

The last two f*ckups that come to mind, which completely turned me away from her- where I just wanted to be as far away from her as humanly possible / sink into the ground and disappear / leave planet Earth or this plane of existence altogether- involved a Facebook post that was meant to be a DM to my best friend from back then (I had this one girl that tolerated all of my social incompetence at the time, bless her), and the grief-related incident.

I'll explain these two as best as I can... I feel like I have already written enough to fill an essay at this point.

The Facebook incident was my incompetence and inability to use social media platforms due to a lack of understanding on how they worked. I was peer-pressured into signing up to Facebook by my classmates in middle school, but I already hated the platform and found it really counter-intuitive. The only reason I used it at all, was to vent to my best friend in highschool, whom I would usually mostly talk to in person (and I may have used it one time to look up a picture of my crush to challenge myself and see if I could draw her at all- since I was really bad at drawing humans and I had this weird belief that if you loved someone, they became impossible for you to draw right), or just interact with people's posts on my feed by liking and commenting on them (most of the time, pictures). The posts were usually from / made by people who added me as a friend (or whom I added from my class, etc.), my crush included.

Now that I think about it carefully, I may have made a panic post after one of my suicide attempts, which I mention later on in this post (the OD related one). But it's hard to tell since it's a fairly blurry memory.

But yeah, sorry for all the crossed out and bracketed text. I just meant to say that me using FB to DM my best friend back then, was mainly due to a period of time where we couldn't see each other much because she was both an extraverted, social party girl, and was in a different class with very separate / conflicting timetables compared to mine (we got separated in second year, while we were still in the same class in first year).

Basically, here is what I thought I was doing: I thought I was sending my best friend a bit of an absurd dream I had, where I was quite literally physically stuck between my crush and her boyfriend- in the dream it didn't seem like anything more than hugging (everybody had their clothes on), but I was joking around, to relieve some of the awkwardness and embarrasment it made me feel, because from a certain close-up angle it looked bad, so I ended up saying something like "it looked like a threesome" in the post- and this was just my idiotic teenage humor. I didn't really mean anything of the sort by it.

If only I had taken the time to read that the button I was about to press said "post", I could have saved myself another huge wave of shame / mortification / humiliation.

I also failed to recognize that my crush and her boyfriend were being automatically tagged- I thought that the blue highlight was some kind of innocuous auto-link thingie to their profiles inside of a DM, and that it had nothing to do with them being tagged / notified of this, and oh man- the backlash was immediate, and it was brutal.

I started getting horrible comments from the boyfriend, her friends, and even her too, probably- shaming me, demanding I take down the post and that it was uncalled for. I immediately deleted the post as soon as I realized it was a post and not a DM, but by that point, the thing had been up a while (a whole night or so), and the damage had been done. I eventually ended up deleting my entire Facebook account due to this and other, less than pleasant things that happened on there.

Moving on to the grief incident-

My depression was not just due to the daily hell that had become my highschool experience the unrequitted feelings I had to live with every day (as well as my subconscious almost constantly tormenting me with dreams featuring her). The one and only person who ever truly loved me in a healthy way also ended up in hospital- and soon passed away from cancer that same year: my maternal grandmother. She was the only ray of sunshine (if not as warm as the whole sun itself) that made me feel like I mattered, was loved and cared for. She would give the biggest, warmest of hugs, and would always put a smile on everyone's face. I still miss her dearly.

This void in my life, left by my grandmother's death, happened very closely —time frame wise— to something that my crush was (unbeknowst to me) experiencing as well. This was during one of the still alternating periods of time where I would mess up occasionally and try my best to fix things- I was still on relatively friendly terms with my crush when, all of a sudden, from one day to another, she started avoiding me and giving me the silent treatment again. It was so sudden and so unexpected that it really caught me off-guard and sent me spiraling into a flurry of anxiety and depression. I was so tired of it all. I just wanted to be socially competent and not embarrass myself at every other turn... I sincerely thought it was my fault, once again- that she wasn't talking to me anymore. That I had done something wrong, inapprorpiate, or unacceptable unknowingly.

There was a spectacular lack of communication in all this, as, if I had known what was going on, I was going to keep away and give her the space she needed to grieve, but essencially: her father, whom she had a really close relationship to, had died. This was told to me much much later, during the friends gang incident.

... Be as it may, this silent treatment of hers was the last straw of a series of bad events and things that happened to me, which pushed me further into my depression- making me feel worse than I had ever felt before in my life (to this day I have never experienced that sort of depressive low again).

I was already failing at school, with all of this emotional turmoil going on- and my narcissistic, neglectful father would just yell at me at home and make things worse. I just spent every other afternoon locked in my room... Which had turned into a depression cave. I was in too much pain, too exhausted, too self-hating and abandoned to myself to care anymore. I just wanted for the pain to stop. I couldn't- and did not want to continue living like this- through this literal hell on Earth, day in, day out. It was one of the worst low-points in my life.

I honestly just wrote a goodbye letter to my online friend (as I had sort of drifted away from my IRL best friend a bit), and thought that would be it. I was going to just slice my wrists open and let myself drain of all life, and then the pain would finally stop.

I know how messed up this sounds, but that's just how messed up I was... and felt. I had nothing to look forward to, no support system, no happy place left (my own head had turned into a place of festering darkness where I was just constantly ridiculed, taken advantage of, neglected or abandoned). And that's where the suicide attempt she learnt about came to be (where her friends ganged up on me afterwise)- Because menacingly reality-checking a broken, anxious, depressed, suicidal, desperate, neglected, autistic teen is the sound-of-mind thing to do, instead of getting help from adults to deal with the situation. You totally aren't going to trigger PTSD and trauma from being bullied early on in other schools, nooo... Sorry. The sarcasm here is some of the leftover bitterness I felt for those people. They expected- or rather demanded of me to act like a functional, not developmentally delayed adult, when none of us were adults to begin with.

Given everything, I don't directly blame them, but there were better ways to deal with the situation compared to what they did- or what the school did, which was exactly nothing.

I needed to stay away from my crush and everyone in that class from the get-go.

I should have been removed and placed into special care and on suicide watch, as well as forced to see a paid-for, competent mental health specialist.

My life would have gone much differently if only they had caught my autism early on. But none of that ever happened. I got encouraged by internet strangers to do the wrong things, driven to near insanity trying to find a balance between handling my feelings, my dumb subconscious and weird brain, and trying to survive in school, while also not making my crush uncomfortable- with little to no socialization skills to aid me whatsoever.

I probably did a lot more damage than I realized, between having to share the same girls' locker rooms when we were changing for P.E.- either at the school's swimming pool or one of the various gyms we visited... And letting my anger (and jealousy) out on her boyfriend during increasingly more violent dodgeball games. 🫠

I was a certified moron, who did not know how to human (I still don't know how to human, but I got better) or have a lid on her own emotions- didn't know what was socially appropriate and what wasn't until I made a fool of myself-

I never, ever want to see my former crush, nor her friends, ever again- unless it's to have an adult chat and have them show some remorse and apologize to me at least a little bit. I know I was a pain in the arse to deal with, and I do not deny all the damage I have done on my end. I acknowledge it and I apologized profusely for it so many times, but there simply wasn't anything I could do to go back in time and reverse it. Life isn't a videogame or simulation where you get several attempts at something. You usually just get one shot and then you are immediately judged.

Highschool turned out to be a flurry of trauma, drama and bad experiences for me. I attempted sucide thrice in that time span and self-harmed in many ways. Not gonna lie, I probably damaged my kidneys a little during one of those suicide attempts (slightly ODd on some food supplements, thinking they were a harder drug).

The sexual trauma from being r*ped also persisted throughout the early part of my adulthood and gave me mood swings and more PTSD. I finally got rid of it around the age of 24, give or take- so basically, during COVID-19, where everything slowed down (and I finally had the time I needed to process all of the repressed, horrible, traumatic sh*t I kept running away from).

But yeah... The aim of this vent post is not to victimize myself in any way, but rather to put my pent up, leftover trauma and feelings into written form and exorcize some demons from the past, so to speak.

I avoided, or tried to avoid my crush throughout the rest of highschool. I literally applied to- and took an exam to change classes, so that I wouldn't have to run into her every single day anymore (though we still bumped into each other in the hallways occasionally). My PTSD and fear of encountering her in the hallway back then was so strong that my attendance kept dropping and getting worse and worse throughout my third year of highschool, even though we were studying different things now.

The sad part is that, to this day, my subconscious just remains on high alert and scans for her presence in places where I had known her to be at, because it's STILL utterly TERRIFIED of bumping into her. I have so many bad associations and traumatic memories related to that person that my brain just identifies her as THREAT / DANGER. I genuinely react worse to the thought / chance of encountering her- than being stalked home by a guy meaning to harm me.

That's the level of psychological damage we are talking about.

To this day, it's the only unresolved trauma I have left.

How I know it still affects me?

Her father was from this seaside village, in a neighboring country (same nationality as my mother- she told me this when we were still friends), where a lot of the local women look rather similar to, or almost just like her. Small gene pool I guess. And while vacationing there at the beach (not by choice, some family friends my mother always wants to visit live there- t'is a smol world), this one girl walks up to our beach spot in my general direction and just as I turn my head, my subconscious sees a shadow of my old crush in this girl / woman's face and I freeze. I felt like someone had poured liquid nitrogen all over me, and I felt this chill- completely root me in place, passing through my body like being impaled with a spear. Hell, it was an undescribable sensation, of the bad kind. The third F of the Fight or Flight responses...? Freeze?

So yeah, f*ck it. I hope the universe keeps her far away from me, though given my luck, that probably won't be the case. I swear to God, if I bump into her anywhere near where I live right now, I am just going to turn 180° and start running in the other direction.

[Insert "why are you running?" Meme here]

Yeah, no, bYE-

---

I'm going to end this post on one, last note: there was something I was never quite able to explain.

During my self-imposed and forced phase of denial (that followed this ordeal, where I thought I was still bi instead of a lesbian because "I only had traumatizing experiences with men, therefore I would like it if the right person came along" -> load of cis-het, homophobic BS that people brainwashed me with), which took place during my last two years of highschool (third and fourth year), I had started dating this one friend of mine, who was compassionate enough to understand I wasn't a danger to anyone but myself, and knew that I was just a troubled teen that needed help.

He was relatively (or even fairly) good-looking, according to the average cis-het beauty standards (not like I cared, it was his kindness that had drawn me to him in a platonic way, since I cannot fall for men) and I think this may have been around the same time where my crush's boyfriend dumped her to be with another female classmate from that same class she was in-

Usually, she (my crush) would just put on a fake smile and wave when she walked past me outside of school (acknowledging my presence), or sometimes just blatantly ignore me (if she was in a bad mood), which was fine by me. But there was this one time where I was walking through the entrance gate that led into our high school, and I was holding hands with my "new boyfriend" (the friend I had started dating) and she was walking in the opposite direction, to leave the school grounds... When she spotted me. She just stared at me with such intense and fierce hatred in her eyes (???), scoffed, and then walked past us. It was so utterly weird...?! Like- was she jealous that I had a boyfriend (that I wasn't even able to love) and she just got dumped...? That's the only logical explanation I could find, because it didn't make any logical sense.

Why would you be jealous of seeing someone who had feelings for you, who you weren't even interested in, called a stalker and wanted gone so bad- date another person? Was she jealous I was with a handsome and generous guy?

I have absolutely no clue to this day, as to what the hell all of that was about.

I tried to put it out of my mind but the nonsensical behavior there stuck with me for quite a bit.

Random thing that resurfaced as a distant memory, while remembering everything else.

People are fekkin weird.

[sinswithpleasure]

First (ft. TWICE's Mina)

[Y/N POV]

"I'm home!"

After a long day of classes over at university, I had finally returned home. Computer Science was not an easy course of study to take, and I usually returned home exhausted every day. I walked over to the fridge, grabbing a cold bottle of water and taking a swig to cool myself down from the walk home.

"Huh, usually Mina greets me with 'Okaeri'... I wonder where she is today."

I sat down at the dining table, resting my exhausted body on the dining chair. I smiled at the thought of my housemate. Sharing this house with her had made the bills so much easier to pay off, and her presence meant I did not have to live alone.

Myoui Sharon Mina's agreement to house with me was through an ad I put out online. I had gone through so many different housemates, and I was ready to give up looking. One was a party girl that kept on bringing guys over to sleep with, and I had walked in on them desecrating my furniture multiple times. Some skipped out on paying their share of the bills. I was starting to get disillusioned with the idea of housemates before she popped around.

Mina had contacted me for an interview through text. She was my last chance I gave myself before resigning to my fate and moving to a smaller apartment. I was expecting another party girl, or someone I would not like instantly. However, when I met up with her, I was instantly blown away with her looks. This woman could easily have featured on any fashion magazine, on the cover, no less. She looked like a modern day princess, and yet, she was just a college student majoring in Dance, and seeking a roof over her head with cheap rent. Mina was nothing short of polite during the interview, and she had laughed when I told her my horror stories of the previous housemates. Throughout the interview, she easily charmed me with her politeness, and her assurance that she was nothing like my previous housemates. While every interviewee I had met promised what she had promised as well, I had a hunch she would stick to her promise.

Mina was also nothing short of what might actually be the perfect housemate. Every time we met in the hallways or in whatever room in the house, she would always greet me in Japanese with a "Good morning/afternoon/evening" with a big smile on her face. She respected all house rules and did her share of the chores, as well as paid her bills on time. This lady was easily the most charming of all my housemates, and it was easy to live with her. Ever the homebody, her only trips out of her room usually was to go to class or to occasionally grab snacks from the fridge or cabinets in the kitchen. Over the months, she loosened up and began to socialise with me more. We bonded over a shared love for gaming and hatred for her many admirers. Many a night was spent killing aliens and raiding dungeons together while cursing out all her admirers. Mina had learnt to read people well from all the boys chasing her for her looks and money through her younger years before college, and it was easy for her to know who was after her for her looks and money. If we weren't gaming together, we were chilling together on the couch watching movies or working on our individual assignments at the table. Point is, she was the best housemate ever, being so easy to get along with, and knowing her limits with the house. She rarely brought anyone over, and if she did, she would get permission from me and clean up after to ensure everyone got the best out of the experience. Did I mention she was loaded? To my surprise, she would easily be able to afford buying her own property, but she refused to spend frivolously. Why waste money when it would be better spent elsewhere on the newest games and more snacks for gaming sessions and movie marathons, or even better, saved for the future?

Spending that much time with her at home slowly led me to develop a crush on her. It wasn't a common occurrence for a housemate to not only be top tier in morals and ethics, but for her to look like the princess of Japan. With her shoulder length ginger hair and a dazzling smile that showed her teeth and gums, along with her bright brown eyes that crinkle with her smile, she was someone that would not be out of place if she was on a painting in a Japanese history museum. Her face was decorated with a number of beauty marks; one on her forehead, one on both her cheeks, one on her nose bridge, another on the left of her nose, one on top of her lips, one below, and one on her chin. Even her body had some. One on her neck, one on her left shoulder, and one on her tummy. These beauty marks, specifically on her face, looked like a constellation in the night sky. She could be doing mundane things like noting words down on a notebook or pouring herself a cup of water, she seemed to execute every action with the elegance of a princess. Every time she looked at me, her hair seemed to fall in place, her side-parted bangs falling nicely to frame the side of her face, covering a bit of her right eye. This would be paired with her dazzling gummy smile or a slight curve of her lips and raise of her eyebrows. She was unhealthy for my heart and I had to try to hide my blush each time I would catch her eye. Knowing her perceptiveness, she probably had already picked up on my crush on her. I could never be sure though, since she had not mentioned anything in the year we've lived together.

"Strange," I muttered to myself, "she's usually home by now. Her classes end at 3pm today. Where is she?" I got up from the chair, wandering over to the hallway that led to both our rooms. Both doors appeared to be closed. "Huh. Guess I'll…"

A faint hiss of breath reached my ears. Maybe it was a figment of my imagination? Before I could dismiss it as so, another breath echoed out into the hallway. That sounded like Mina's breathing… What was she doing? She was home?

I tiptoed my way towards the sounds, each one bringing me closer to my destination. Without noticing, I had stopped in front of Mina's room.

A gasp this time. As my hand reached to knock on the door, I noticed that said door was slightly ajar. While I hesitated to peek in, curiosity won, and I leaned to look into her room.

"What the fuck?" My jaw dropped from shock.

Myoui Sharon Mina lay on her queen sized bed, her ginger hair splayed out, a halo on her pillowcase. Her back was arched, chest pushed out, taut nipples straining the thin T-shirt covering her body. One hand of hers gripped the sheets of her bed, balling them in her fist, as the other…

Her other hand was shielded by her legs, but it was obvious what she was doing to herself, with muffled slick and wet sounds emanating from between her legs. Her shorts were thrown haphazardly next to where she lay on the bed, her panties still around her hips. Both knees met each other as she clenched her thighs around her hand. Her beautiful eyes were squeezed shut, brows furrowed, her bottom lip trapped underneath the bite of her teeth in an effort to muffle whatever sounds her voice would make.

I almost let out a gasp of my own. Arousal shot straight down to my groin, my cock beginning to harden at the sight. Never in my wildest dreams would I expect to physically see my housemate fucking herself with her fingers. Sure, in the year I had fantasized a lot about her during my own relaxation sessions, but those would only remain as fantasies. I was a little bit ashamed to admit that prim and proper Myoui Sharon Mina was the object of a lot of my sexual fantasies. I always imagined her stripping for me, our lips locking and tongues meeting, as we made love with each other, or her bent over a desk while I took her from behind, or if I was having sex with her in missionary position on my bed. I had also dreamed up this scenario before, where it ended up with us having sex with each other. Many a night was spent thinking about her body under her clothes, from her average sized breasts under her T-shirts or sweaters, to her round ass under her jeans, or to her solid abs whenever she wore anything that showed her core muscles. However, never would I have ever thought that this would come true in reality.

"Aaah~..." A moan broke my reverie. Mina had moved her left hand from balling the sheets to cup her right breast over her shirt, kneading the soft flesh. She whimpered at her own ministrations, before pinching her erect nipples over the T-shirt. "Mmmh~ fuck..." She shifted on the bed, panting at the exertions of her right hand between her legs, and the pleasure she was giving herself. Each time she pinched her nipple, she would arch her back a little, before biting her lip and letting out a soft "Mmmf~".

I knew I should retire to my room and leave her alone. This was an invasion of her trust and privacy, and my peeping on her, whether accidental or not, was not something I should be doing. However, I could not will my eyes to tear away from the sight of Myoui Sharon Mina fucking herself with her fingers. While I could not see what she was doing to herself, I could only assume she was circling her own clit through the motions of her forearm. My dick was straining against my jeans now, and I squeezed it to alleviate some pressure. Mina now had swapped to her left breast, and she had stopped biting her lip, opting to just pant in pleasure.

I was sure my underwear was ruined by now, with the amount of pre-cum I was producing. Unable to take the straining, I unzipped my jeans and let my bulge out. I did not want to pull my dick out or jerk off as she could catch me as I caught her, and that would easily ruin our current friendship beyond repair. Shit, this wasn't the dream I envisioned at all…

"Aaaagh~! Fuck it!"

Mina's unusually loud exclamation of frustration echoed out of her room. I looked up from my actions with my pants in time to see her fingers hook under the waistband of her panties and aggressively rip them off her hips. She kept her eyes shut as she raised her hips to allow for herself to remove the offending undergarment. Pulling harshly at her panties, she raised her legs up and flung them to a corner of her room, before yanking her shirt up to expose her breasts. Her legs returned to their prior position, with her thighs clenched around her right hand, circling at her most private of areas.

Another pang of arousal shot to my groin, and I felt more pre-cum flowing out of my dick. Holy fucking shit, Mina was a fucking goddess. As mentioned prior, her average breasts were fitting for her frame, but to see these same breasts naked… they were perky and smooth, and her nipples pert, the areola small. These same nipples were just as taut as they were under the T-shirt, their light brown a nice transition from the honey-fair skin she had. God, she was so fucking hot and I wished she would take me to bed with her. Before I could fully believe in my luck, Mina unknowingly took what might have been her killing shot at my health and well-being.

"Mmmh~ yes~!"

Mina's closed legs from before fell to their sides as she spread herself on the bed. Another rush of pre-cum shot out of my dick as I finally saw Mina's wet pussy for the first time. She was shaved clean, her pink lips spread and glistening with arousal. Mina's fingers were rubbing on her clit roughly, her left hand pinching her nipples directly now. She squirmed and whimpered with each tug on her own nipples, and the sinful words that left her mouth next almost made me moan out loud, had I not covered my mouth quickly.

"Fuck, yes, [Y/N], Aaaah~!"

Mina's middle and ring fingers penetrated her own pussy, as she moaned my name repeatedly. "Mmm~ fuck~ [Y/N]... aaah~ you're so big, so hot, mmmh~" Her fingers thrusted in and out of herself. I could see her drenched fingers each time she pulled out, showing how turned on she was. She angled her hand to allow for the pad of her thumb to rub her clit, and her fingers appeared to curl inside her with each thrust. "Yes! Right there! Mmmf~ fuck!" Her motions seemed to get faster and faster, as she writhed on her bed at the pleasure she was feeling. I gripped onto my bulge, rubbing myself over my briefs. Mina's moaning of my name turned me on so much; my dick was twitching in its confinements. I was barely controlling myself, and I could feel my willpower slowly leaking away. However, I disciplined myself and kept myself from going further than that.

"Oh fuck! Fuck! Shit! That feels so good, fuck~! I'm so close, I'm so close, fuck! [Y/N], fuck, [Y/N], I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum I'm gonna fucking cum on your cock, fuck, I'm gonna- aaAAAH~!"

Mina's hips bucked wildly as she thrashed in pleasure on the bed, her fingers fucking herself through her orgasm. I nearly came in my pants at the sight of her, as her loose hand gripped onto the bed sheets as an outlet for the pleasure wrecking her lustful young body. Mina's body glistened with sweat, her flushed skin wet from the sweat that formed from the exertion of her masturbation. She withdrew her fingers from her pussy, raising them to her eyes as she played with the strings of sticky fluid between said fingers. Mina then put her fingers to her mouth, her tongue darting out to clean them of the juices from her orgasm. The smile on her face depicted the afterglow of her orgasm. Her head tilted towards the door after, her eyes opening slightly as she panted heavily. The same pair of eyes appeared to have met mine, and I darted back to my room before I could verify. Panic coursed through my veins, and as I shut my room door too loudly for my liking, I leaned against the wall, face in my palms. I had no idea how I was going to face her if she really caught me peeping on her…

'Tomorrow's problems for tomorrow's me,' I told myself. For now, I had my issues to solve in the form of my arousal, and what better than a cold shower?

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[Mina's POV]

I'd caught [Y/N] peeping on me.

Well… this was mortifying. I'd been loudly moaning his name as I fucked myself and he'd probably watched every second of it.

Shit… his schedule today ends at 4pm… he could make it home in the time it took me to masturbate. How could I forget? Stupid me!

He did seem very happy to watch me though, evident from the hard bulge sticking out of his zipper and the wet spot that formed on his briefs…

How was this now a development in both our lives?

I'd returned home earlier that day, in the afternoon. The stress of the day was overwhelming; my assignment for a choreography was due soon and I still had lots to work on and practice. Furthermore, many other classes I took had assignments due, and I barely had enough alone time to myself as is. I moved to my room, changing from my school outfit to my home outfit, a simple plain white T-shirt and shorts. 'Fuck wearing the bra,' I thought, 'finally I get to be free of it. It's not like [Y/N] returns home soon anyway.'

I made a trip to the kitchen for a cup of water. It was rare to get some alone time at this point of the semester, and the stress was getting to me. As I leaned on the kitchen counter, drinking from my cup, my brain led me down a train of naughty thoughts.

'You're home alone, Mina. [Y/N]'s not here. You're stressed and you haven't masturbated in weeks. What's stopping you now? He doesn't come home early today…'

It was true, I was pent up for weeks and desperately needed a good orgasm. Every day was spent working on my assignments or choreographing something. I needed a release and it had been a while since I'd fingered myself. Heat pooled at my stomach; the need to masturbate had increased tenfold.

I returned to my room, giving the door a half-hearted push, and making myself comfortable on my bed. Rubbing myself over my shorts, I closed my eyes and let my mind wander. My thoughts were a mess at the beginning, but they slowly coalesced into the form of my housemate.

[Y/N] was a solid housemate. Ever the respectful man, he was never rude and unpleasant to anyone he knew, and he made it a point to be especially polite to any service staff he had the pleasure to meet. Every time I went out with him to restaurants or diners, the waiters or waitresses always received the utmost respect from him, and if he could tip them, he could. 'They are doing their best, and I'm sure any bit helps' was his reasoning when questioned. He cared for me a lot, always offering me a listening ear and advice when required, and I will never regret my decision to ask him to cuddle with me once when I was really down in the dumps. He became my best friend and my rock within the year we've lived together, and it wasn't difficult to end up crushing on him. He was able to lead me through my indecisiveness and take my hand through so many issues I'd face, and he knew how to be playful and have fun, such as dissing my many admirers or any stupid characters in movies in humorous ways. This man was my ideal type.

As I felt my arousal grow at the thought of [Y/N], I thought of all the times I saw him shirtless at home. As if it wasn't enough to be my ideal type of man already, being able to lead me and be playful and mature when required, he was lean, fit, and tall. I'd seen him return home after going for jogs, or when he'd work out at home. His body, shining with sweat, droplets cascading down his broad shoulders to his defined chest, running over his beautiful six-pack abs… His thick biceps and triceps…. This man was not built like a bodybuilder; I know my descriptions make it seem like he was one but he was just one sexy lean and fit man. I wonder what he packed between his legs...

My thoughts wandered to the times I've seen him flushed and panting after the exertion of workout, and I wondered if he'd look and sound the same if he was flushed and panting from jerking his cock… I imagined him lying on his bed, jerking his cock. Fuck, I was getting so wet, and there wasn't enough stimulation over my shorts…

At this point, I was breathing a little heavier from the pleasure coursing through my veins. I raised my hips, pulling my shorts off my hips and haphazardly flinging it to the side of the bed. My right hand returned to my pussy, rubbing it all over my panties. My nipples had hardened from arousal over the course of my ministrations and they were now tenting the loose tee I had on. My other hand gripped the sheets, seeking an outlet with the pleasure I felt. Rubbing my clit over my panties felt really good, but I hungered for actual contact. Slipping my hand under the waistband of my panties, I sought out my clit. The first contact of my fingers and my clit led me to buck my hips involuntarily, letting out an "Aaah~". My knees knocked against each other as I clenched my thighs around my hand.

As I rubbed circles around my clit, I imagined [Y/N]'s fingers on my pussy. I imagined his fingers rubbing my clit the same way I was now, as he leaned over me shirtless, lowering himself to bring his lips to mine. I bit my bottom lip, hissing in pleasure, as I imagined him licking at my lips and meeting my tongue with his, frenching me as he pleasured my pussy just the way I liked. God, this fantasy was making me so wet; I felt my juices flowing out of my naughty pussy and wetting my fingers. If this carried on, I'd surely end up wetting my underwear.

My fingers kept circling my clit as I arched my back, pushing my nipples against the thin material of my T-shirt. "Aaah~ fuck~" I moaned, my fist balling the sheets under me. I bit my lip again, keeping my vocal outlet to hisses and releases of breath. I kept circling my clit, refusing to give in to the temptation to play with my own breasts.

In my mind, [Y/N] had stopped frenching me and had turned his attention to my neck. I imagined his tongue running a line from my collarbone to my neck, before he bit onto my earlobe. I imagined him whispering to me, "You're mine now, Mina. All mine…" I writhed on the bed at the thought, leaning my head to the left, exposing my neck to the [Y/N] in my fantasy. As he left butterfly kisses down my neck, I imagined him pulling back up and asking, "Ooh, what's this?" as he reached for my right nipple. I released the tightly balled sheets from my iron grip, timing my movements with my fantasy. Imaginary [Y/N] tugged on my nipple, fondling my right breast over my T-shirt. I could not resist the moans that left my lips, and I let the fantasy run wild as I rhythmically tugged on my nipple, my fingers now teasing the entrance of my pussy, coating my fingers in my fluids.

"Mmmf~ fuck~" The wet, slick sounds of my fingers playing with my pussy echoed in my room, as I prepared to penetrate myself. I was very pent up now, as I imagined myself stripping naked to let imaginary [Y/N] fuck my slutty pussy with his hard cock. I couldn't take my own teasing any longer.

"Aaaagh~! Fuck it!" I hooked my thumbs to the waistband of my panties, frantically pulling them off myself. Pulling up my shirt to expose my bare breasts to the cool air, I began to fondle myself, ignoring the volume of my moans. I spread my legs wide, letting the [Y/N] in my mind see how wet I was for him. At the same time, I circled my clit for a short while more before penetrating myself with my middle and ring fingers, imagining a naked [Y/N] penetrating my wet pussy with his hard cock. I moaned his name out loud at the pleasure from my fingers. My pussy sucked my fingers in, squeezing them in a vice like grip. My tight pussy refused to let my fingers go, and I released a loud exclamation and moan of [Y/N]'s name. I was so fucking wet now and wished [Y/N] was fucking my pussy for real.

"How does my cock feel in your pussy, babe? How does it feel having me fuck your wet slutty pussy?" I began to thrust my fingers in my pussy, my other hand gripping my breasts hard, mimicking the imaginary [Y/N] fucking my slutty body. "Mmm~ fuck~ [Y/N]... aaah~ you're so big, so hot, mmmh~," I moaned out, "you fuck me so good, so fucking good~ aaah~ I need more of your cock~"

I angled my hand to be able to both thrust in my pussy and rub my clit directly. "Yes! Right there! Mmmf~ fuck!" With practiced ease, my fingers rubbed the rough patch on the front of my pussy on each thrust, and it did not take long before I was on my way to orgasm.

I could hear [Y/N]'s gruff voice in my ear as I worked my way to orgasm. "You're mine, Mina. I'm gonna fuck you until you cum on my cock, and I'm gonna fill your pussy with my cum. Take my cum, slut." Imaginary [Y/N] began to pound my pussy as I simulated his thrusts through the use of my fingers. My pussy got tighter and wetter with each thrust, each tug of my nipples fraying the tense rope keeping me from falling over the edge. I was so close, so fucking close… I needed to cum hard...

"Oh fuck! Fuck! Shit! That feels so good, fuck~! I'm so close, I'm so close, fuck! [Y/N], fuck, [Y/N], I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum I'm gonna fucking cum on your cock, fuck, I'm gonna- aaAAAH~!"

My pussy squeezed my fingers within as a rush of fluid sprayed onto my fingers and palm. My hips bucked uncontrollably as I carried on thrusting through my orgasm to prolong the pleasure, my free hand dropping back to the sheets and gripping them as I writhed in pleasure, riding out the orgasm I desperately needed. My tight pussy finally relaxed enough for me to pull out, and my lust-addled thoughts brought me to bring my fingers up to let me taste my own cum. I licked my own juices akin to my favorite ice cream, short licks harvesting my cum from my fingers into my mouth. I smiled at how naughty I was, imagining my lovely housemate railing my slutty body, wet and ready for him to fuck, fingerfucking myself to him, and then tasting my own cum. As I lay exhausted on my bed, I made myself comfortable, opening my shut eyes to catch eye contact with [Y/N], peeking through the crack in my open door, squeezing his bulge that stuck through the zipper of his jeans, the wet spot evident on his briefs.

[Y/N] darted to his room straight after, and I could not believe he had just watched and heard me fucking myself while fantasizing about him. Again, I was very mortified. How could I forget he came back early today??

I had so much to think about now… what do I do and how can I face him for dinner tonight?

Flashes of [Y/N]'s bulge whizzed past my mind again, sending a new wave of arousal down to my pussy. Fuck… what do I do now? Groaning in embarrassment, I divested myself of my tee, wrapping myself in a towel, grabbing clean clothes, and going for a shower.

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[Y/N's POV]

The cold shower did not help.

Throughout my shower, I was painfully hard. Every time I closed my eyes, I could hear Mina moaning my name, see her fingers thrusting into her wet pussy, the slick sounds of her arousal ringing in my ears, and the visual of her arching her back, her face frozen in a broken scream, hips bucking wildly as she fucked her own pussy through orgasm, and her naughty smile as she licked her fingers clean.

I sighed in resignation at my current situation. It was clear that I'd have to deal with this issue myself over the next few days and try to maintain a normal relationship with Mina. Opening the door to the bathroom while drying my wet hair, I met Mina's wide brown eyes staring back at me, her bare arm reaching out for the door handle. Looking down over her body, I gasped in shock. Mina had styled her messy hair a little bit, but she was still visually sweaty and sticky from her earlier exertion. However, she was clad in nothing but a towel, her other arm carrying her fresh clothing to change to. My eyes roamed over her body; bare shoulders exposed, the smooth skin still a little flushed, yet so desirable. Her defined collarbones next, then down her bare arms, my eyes darting to her chest and down her torso, to her bare legs. I felt myself grow hard as I stared at the hint of cleavage above her towel, then to her bare legs, swapping between both parts of her body. I looked back up at Mina's face, which was coloured red by a blush. The constellation of moles on her face shone to my eyes, which trailed down each mole before locking on her brown eyes.

She was a work of art. Her parents' masterpiece. Not only was she such a pleasure to be friends with, she was (very) easy on the eyes, and her body was downright fucking sinful. God knows the things I'd do to get to bed her…

"[Y/N]?" Mina's soft voice snapped me out of my daydreams. Slapping a hand over my eye, I exclaimed out my apologies, pulling the door open and letting her in, before running out of the bathroom back to my own room.

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[Mina's POV]

I knew I had [Y/N] in the palm of my hand.

I knew what I was doing wearing only a towel. I knew he would go for a shower straight after, hearing the bathroom door close straight after.

He peeped on me. I wasn't angry that he did, after all, this was a bit of a fantasy of mine and it was turning me on so much knowing he watched me fuck myself thinking of his cock in my pussy. However, he peeped on me, and it was only fair for me to use the same body he peeped on to tease him.

I want to push him to his limit. How much of me can he take before he masturbates to me like I did to him?

[Y/N] has a moderately strong moral and ethical code. On a night where we were both drinking, under the influence of the liquid courage, I quizzed him on what he would do if he caught a girl masturbating to him. I'm sure it put a lot of thoughts to his head, but he had a genuine and serious look on his face when he told me he would not take advantage of or touch himself thinking of it. Those were her private times and if he came across it, he would try his best to ignore it as much as possible, though he did admit that if it really happened, he would not be able to resist watching…

Lesser men probably would have taken advantage of the girl in such a vulnerable state.

He was so cute, embarrassed yet trying to give me a proper answer while attempting to subtly check out my body. It was clear who the girl in his mind's eye was.

Oh yes, his feelings. Clear as day. I wanted him to confess first though. I never got the courage to. :(

Well, everyone has their weaknesses. Lord knows if I found him masturbating to me, I'd watch him too...

I giggled as I turned on the shower. He wouldn't know what awaited him. After all, everyone had their dirty desires deep down, and innocent shy homebody Myoui Mina also had her own perverted desires, and that involved teasing and seducing her sexy housemate until he broke, ultimately leading him into her open arms and into her bed.

As I lathered myself in soap and gave myself a good clean scrub, I thought back to earlier, when I caught eyes with [Y/N]. I focused on his bulge sticking out of his zipper and the wet spot of precum at the tip. He was so turned on by me and my body… My clit throbbed and I felt myself get wet again.

'I guess this is round two for me,' I thought, as my fingers reached down to my pussy again.

"Mmmf~"

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[Mina's POV - Post Shower]

Ah, what a relaxing shower…

I walked over to the kitchen, hearing the sizzle of a hot pan. I carried on drying my wet hair, walking into the kitchen. "Hey [Y/N], good evening," I greeted with a smile. [Y/N] seemed to jump at my voice, looking anywhere but at me, his skin flushed. "Ah! Err… good evening Mina, dinner's almost ready." I smirked, walking over to him as he turned back to the pan, one hand nervously scratching at his neck.

"Yaaah~, why're you so red? Are you ill?" I grabbed [Y/N]'s hand, pulling him to face me before putting my hand to his forehead. "No, you're fine…" I pouted, whining and shaking to act cute for him, "nnnhhh~, you're not looking at me when I talk to you. What's wrong?" I pinched both his cheeks and pulled him to look straight into my eyes as I puffed my cheeks, pout still in full force.

I thought it was impossible for [Y/N] to get any redder. I was quickly proven wrong as he froze for a short while, before quickly darting out of my grasp to attend to the sizzling pan. I whined again, "Oeiii~ reply me reply me reply me reply meeee~" as I poked his arm rhythmically.

"N-nothing, Mina, I'm okay…" He sounded so shaky. I laughed, poking his cheek and leaving to hang up my towel and get ready for dinner. "Tease ya~"

As I hung up my towel, I internally squealed at how cute he was being flustered. I would have never been brave enough to do this, but circumstances now had clearly changed, and I had power over him… the smile on my face quickly turned devious. I would tease him even more soon…

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[Y/N POV]

Mina was killing me. She was out for my blood.

Not only was it bad enough to have the image of her nubile and supple naked body burnt into every corner of my mind and the sound of her orgasm ringing in my ears, she came to the kitchen in another clean oversized tee and shorts. Although this wasn't any different attire at home in the past year, knowing that this was the most comfortable homewear to her, the fact that I knew what she looked like under those layers and how she sounded in her most intimate and vulnerable of times, I could not help but feel a deep lust for her that I had to fight to control. I'd been painfully erect for a while now and I clearly needed to quit thinking about it. To make things even worse, her hair was wet and a little messy still, and a Mina with wet hair and bareface was even worse for my health than a made up Mina was.

I refuse to masturbate to her. She asked me once about what I would do if I caught a girl masturbating while thinking of me. I don't know if she was asking me because of a lack of inhibition due to the alcohol we were drinking, or if it was out of a burning curiosity. She was particularly eager to know my answer though. I told her that I would try my best to ignore it and leave, but… I had to admit I probably would fail and watch…

At that time, I was already deep in crush with her, and my mind instantly wandered to imagining her on her bed fingering herself to me. I could not control myself from checking her body out before answering, and while she adorned a gentle smile as she waited patiently, her eyes twinkled with mirth. Visions of her with a hand between her legs, her grinding her pussy on a bed frame, her arching her back in orgasm, her pussy gushing as she bucks wildly, streams of cum squirting out and forming puddles on the floor… I had to fight these thoughts to answer her quickly before it started getting weird.

I invaded her privacy. It was not right for me to act on the events I had viewed. I knew if she did not know that I had seen what she was doing, I was technically in the clear… and this current notion of not acting on the visuals of her was probably hypocritical, as I had clearly spent many nights in the past year bringing myself to orgasm through imagining her beautiful body...

I did not know what to do with myself.

"Hey [Y/N], good evening."

I felt so embarrassed jumping at the sweet sound of her voice. "Ah! Err… good evening Mina, dinner's almost ready." I couldn't look at her for longer than a second.

"Yaaah~, why're you so red? Are you ill?" She pulled my arm, getting me to face her with her left hand, and raising her right, landing the knuckles of her fingers to my forehead. "No, you're fine…" She began to pout, sending my heart rate up. Stomping her feet, she whined and shook herself, swaying my arm with both her hands on my left wrist. "Nnnhhh~, you're not looking at me when I talk to you. What's wrong?" She pinched both my cheeks, then squished my face in her hands. She locked eyes with me in a mock glare, her cheeks puffed out akin that of a chipmunk or squirrel, and the same pout from earlier still being weaponized against me.

How could I look at her? I was so ashamed that I peeped on her. Furthermore, all I could think of was that the fingers on my forehead were the same fingers that were in her pussy and fucked her to satisfaction, and the same fingers she licked her orgasm off of.

I leaned a bit into her touch, feeling the cold of her hands on my cheeks. The aroma of her buttermilk body wash enveloped my senses, the only sound audible being my heartbeat. I could feel the heat of my face, and I felt so shy and uneasy in her hands. She'd never initiated this type of skinship with me before, and her hands were so smooth, her aroma so intoxicating, and she looked so adorable with puffed cheeks and pout on her face.

"Oeiii~ reply me reply me reply me reply meeee~" She poked me in the arm repeatedly. I felt faint. The pout never left her face and her high-pitched cutesy voice made her so much more lovable...

How could someone so sexy be so adorable?

"N-nothing, Mina, I'm okay…" Fuck, I sounded so unsure of myself.

She giggled, her eyes evidently showing her amusement and mischief. "Tease ya~." She poked my cheek, exiting to the balcony to hang up her towel.

--

Mina wasn't done with me.

Dinner was so awkward together since I had been shocked into silence from today. I couldn't even take glances at Mina without a mix of arousal, shame, and shyness. Every time my eyes met Mina's, she would smirk at me.

"[Y/N], are you okay? You're so shy today, did something happen? Hehehe"

… was that a hint? Did she see me?

No, no, no.

No no no no.

There's no way.

I blushed redder.

"You can tell me anything, you know?" She giggled again, a coy smile curving her lips. "I'll try to help you just as you've… helped me…"

My cock strained against my shorts.

Her tone seemed to hint to me that she knew of my viewing of her, but her smile had become half coy and half genuine. I did not know what to feel.

"Okay, thanks Mina."

Dinner was uneventful after as we both ate our fill.

Everything that had transpired today kept replaying in my mind. I really needed to sleep over today. I rose from my chair, getting ready to clear up and wash the dishes.

"[Y/N]!" I felt Mina come from behind me, her arms wrapping around my torso in a back hug. She embraced me tightly, tiptoeing to reach my ear, whispering to me, "Thank you for dinner today, hehe." She squeezed a little tighter.

I could feel her soft breasts pushing against my back. Her hot breath at my ear gave me a shudder, her lips nearly touching my ear. Her scent once again enveloped my senses, and I leaned back into her touch a bit. "Ah! Y-you're welcome, Mina."

I could hear her smile, and next thing I knew, I could feel her soft lips land near my nape, just above my collarbone. I audibly gasped, another shudder running through my body. I whipped around, stumbling backwards a bit away from Mina, my left hand reaching up to the spot she had just left a kiss on. Her lips were puckered slightly, slowly morphing into a smile. "Good night, [Y/N]." She turned around, skipping from the kitchen back to her room.

She was seducing me and I had to shamefully admit it was working.

I blushed. Her boobs were really soft.

----------

[Mina's POV]

In the safety of my own room, I jumped onto my bed, squealing into my pillow. [Y/N] was so cute!!! I was out to fluster him with just words but I ended up probably turning him on and getting to finally hug and kiss him like how I would in my daydreams.

This man was so turned on during dinner. I did not intend to hug him, but I had a rush of confidence and decided to follow my heart, and I could feel his shudders with my breath on his ear and my kiss on his neck. In my hug, I made sure to squeeze him tight, and I'm sure he felt my chest on his back… I hope he liked that.

I'm so happy he liked what I did today.

--

I woke up the next morning, a large smile on my face. Picking up my phone, I viewed the notifications from last night and the early morning.

Text from [Y/N]: Hey Mina, I'm going to school for a consultation session. Will be back at 12pm.

It was 10am now, and on a Friday. I had no classes on a Friday, and neither did he. Tonight was our gaming night, and… now I had three days to break his resolve.

He was my prey now, and I'm determined to get what I want.

Getting up from my bed, I stretched upwards. I had a really good few days to sleep in, and a few days to try to seduce [Y/N]. What's not to love about the weekend?

Heading to the bathroom, I passed by the wall mirror hung up in the hallway. God, I looked good this morning. I had slept the night prior in a thin T-shirt and boyshorts, forgoing the bra for comfort, of course. Sure, my hair was messy from sleep, but I knew for a fact I looked really good today. Snapping a few pictures with my phone, I smirked to myself. I couldn't help but think, 'It's not every day I feel this good, why not take more pics of my body?' Raising my shirt to reveal my breasts, I bit onto the hem of my shirt as I snapped a pic. I then took off my shirt, snapping more pics of my bare chest, before stripping bare and taking more photos of my nude body. I looked so hot. 'Maybe one day I could send these to [Y/N],' I thought, 'Investment.'

Putting my clothes back on, I proceeded to the kitchen for breakfast

--

"I'm home!"

I rose from my place on the couch, calling out "Okaeri". As [Y/N] walked into the living room, I stretched upwards, smiling in content at the comfort. When I opened my eyes, [Y/N] was furiously blushing once more, and his eyes were locked onto my chest.

Oh right, I'm not wearing a bra.

Well, I didn't plan this… but sure, I'm gonna make use of it.

"Like something you see~?" I swayed my hips a bit as I made my way to him. Pulling my shirt down a bit to show my cleavage, I bent down a little as I looked him straight in the eye with a smile. I could see him short circuiting; his eyes were locked on my boobs, and he might have actually forgotten how to breathe. [Y/N] shook his head, looking away while pulling my shirt up for me. "You can't do this, Mina! A lady shouldn't be doing this!" Such a cutie, flustered and horny at the same time.

"Nnngh~, why not?" I turned up my cuteness, hugging his arm and pulling it right between my breasts. Coy smile in place, I locked eyes with him, seeing him redden. "Mina, you're not usually like this. What's gotten into you?" I smirked, tiptoeing to reach his ear. "Maybe… I want you to watch me," I whispered. [Y/N] recoiled in shock, out of my grasp, but I just winked at him, pushing my hair up with my left hand, sultrily whispering once more, "Only look at me."

[Y/N]'s eyes were still switching between my face and breasts, and I was sure he could see my nipples tenting the T-shirt. His eyes travelled down to my boyshort panties and smooth milky legs, then to my thigh gap. I was starting to get horny from the pure lust displayed in his eyes as he checked out my body.

I was riling him up as much as he was riling me up, and I loved playing with him like this. Sure, maybe I might be acting very slutty right now, but I know that he wouldn't give in to me so easily, and I want to break his resolve before I take him. I want him to want me as much as I wanted him yesterday, and I want to see him cum for me while moaning my name as he jerks himself off.

I would have never done this if I did not know how much he enjoyed watching me fuck myself to him, but with how turned on he was and how he feels about me, both romantically and morally, I think I'm not going to care too much about image…

"My eyes are up here, [Y/N]," I drawled, "Unless you want me to show you more~" As I prepared to strip myself of my shirt, he grabbed my hands and pulled my shirt down. "NO! Nonono, Mina, that's fine, that's fine."

So red. So flustered. So cute. So… vulnerable.

I giggled. "Come on, let's get lunch! What do you wanna order?"

--

I could feel [Y/N]'s eyes roam over my body throughout the afternoon. I made sure to sway my hips a bit more when I walked, stretch more to show my chest, and show more of my legs to him. God, his lustful eyes when he thought I wasn't looking… I could feel myself getting bolder as he watched me.

Maybe I've got an exhibitionist kink… but only for him.

I want him to look at me more…

I snuggled up next to him, feeling him stiffen. He shifted in his seat, unsubtly arranging the pillow covering his lap. "Hehe, you're so stiff… is there something wrong?" He averted his eyes from me, a restless drumming of his fingers tapping a rhythm into the pillow. "No, Mina, nothing's wrong…" He trailed off, as if uncertain of his own answer. Then, in a move of confidence, I straddled him, kneeling over the pillow on his lap. "Then why won't you look at me?" I pouted, resting my hands on his shoulders. He turned to me, before snapping his head to the left again. "Mina! What-?! No, no, stop!" Grabbing his face with my hands, I turned his head to face my eyes. "You can look, I don't mind~"

[Y/N] seemed to have overheated. I giggled, getting off him. "I'm gonna go shower, enjoy yourself!"

----------

[Y/N's POV]

Mina was making it really hard for me not to jerk off to her.

She probably knows I saw her.

"Maybe… I want you to watch me"

"You can look, I don't mind~"

Coming home to an essentially almost naked Mina was a very… welcome surprise. A braless Mina only in a tee and panties was a dream I'd had for ages. Furthermore, she made sure to get her body in contact with mine, and give me the most amount of time to check her sexy body out.

God, her nipples tenting her shirt and that fucking thigh gap… I just wanted to rip her clothing off and fuck her pussy until she squirted all over the floor and I filled her hole with my cum.

I couldn't stop looking at her nipples, her legs, and that juicy ass in her boyshorts. She was quickly eroding my self control, and I really needed to rub one out soon… To make things even worse, she straddled me, giving me an eyeful of her body and the vision of what it would be like if she rode me. My resolve was quickly eroding, and it hadn't even been 24 hours since I watched her.

Mina's deep "You can look, I don't mind~" rang in my mind once more. I shook my head at the intrusive thought. I really wanted to keep looking, but I didn't feel like it was right to do so. This wasn't the usual Mina I was living with, it felt like this was Sharon Myoui instead, the more confident and sexy version.

Myoui Mina and Sharon Myoui were two sides of the same coin. Mina was the soft spoken homebody that giggled at the ending of spoken sentences, the girl that fluttered her legs when she was elated, waddled like a penguin when she walked, would gush and coo at how cute penguins and dogs were while "vibrating" by jumping and alternating between both left and right feet, and whose eyes would turn into crescents when she smiled her gorgeous gummy smile. This Mina was dorky and usually would be in the background doing something hilarious and cute.

Sharon, however, was the side of Mina when she got serious, when she was determined to obtain something she wanted. Sharon was basically the 'leader' part of Mina, when she took charge and made things happen. This side of Mina appeared if she was put in a leadership role, and she led with efficiency and high standards. This Mina was blunt and determined with endless fire and desire to succeed, and… this was the hottest Mina. She intimidated and aroused me a lot with this facet of her personality, and I… I would bottom for her if she came for me like that. This Mina knew what she wanted, and she knew she would get exactly what she wished for and how to obtain that success.

Now that she had locked the Sharon Myoui facet of her personality to me, I knew it was only a matter of time before I would give in. She'd given me a smug smirk as she left for her shower, and I basically just wet even more of my ruined briefs.

I refuse to jerk off to her.

My thoughts were interrupted by Mina calling my name, waving a hand in front of my eyes while bent to keep eye contact with me.

Oh fuck, she did this on purpose… a hoodie and boyshorts only? And the hoodie is unzipped enough to show a lot of her cleavage? Is she trying to flash me?

Mina smiled her crescent eye smile, no gums this time. "Ah, there we go. You were quite distracted. What were you thinking about?" Her eyes twinkled with mirth as she smirked, seemingly knowing that her giving me and eyeful of her cleavage was causing me to overheat once more. "I'm gonna cook dinner, what do you want?" Mina asked, tilting her head to the right. Before I could give her an actual answer, my mouth moved quicker than my brain could filter. "You."

Oh fuck. Fuck. What did I just say?

Mina's usually soft brown eyes were now hardened with lust and desire. She straightened up, once again kneeling on the couch and straddling me, a leg on either side of my thigh. I gripped the cushion on my lap hard, a rush of arousal shooting straight to my hard cock. Fuck, it hurts… straining against my pants for so long did not feel good at all. She had the hood of her hoodie up when she first greeted me, and now that she was on top of me, she had raised her left hand to push the hood off her as she flicked her hair back. She bit her bottom lip and sank onto the cushion as I quickly retracted my arms to avoid touching her. Her weight fully rested on the cushion as her arms snaked around my neck and she shifted to keep level eye contact with me.

"Oh," she breathed, "are you sure?" Her intense gaze seemed to pierce into my very soul. She bit her bottom lip, grinding down on the cushion in a slow circle, her actions causing the cushion to rub on my cock pleasurably. A whimper escaped my lips at her burning gaze, her lust and animalistic desire to consume her prey evident, and the pleasure from her essentially grinding directly on my cock. One hand of hers slid down to the zipper of her hoodie, then she slipped the zipper down enough to show the valley between her breasts and the lack of a bra.

"Fuck, I'm so sorry!" I pushed Mina off me onto the couch, as I rotated and leapt off. I caught a glimpse of Mina's confused face turning into disappointment as I sprinted into my room and shut the door, sinking to the ground in embarrassment. Oh wait… I left Mina there. In disappointment. 'I have to fix that immediately', I thought, as I opened the door to my room.

"Mina I do want you, you're fucking hot as hell but not like this, I'm so sorry!"

Fuck, what was I saying?

Slamming the door shut, I winced, then rushed to fill the silence of my room with music.

'Ding!'

I looked at my mobile phone. Myoui Mina has sent you a message.

I opened the private chat we had, and threw my phone away in shock.

Mina had sent a picture of herself wearing the same hoodie, and only the hoodie. She sat on the couch, spreading her legs open to show her glistening pussy. Her hoodie was spread open to show her breasts and pert nipples.

Myoui Mina: This could have been yours if you'd just let me fuck you.

'Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!'

I had to look. A whole set of pictures.

The next picture consisted of Mina in the same position, but her free hand spread her pussy lips wide open for the camera.

Myoui Mina: Look at how wet I was for you.

Another picture - Mina now sent a picture of her fingers, wet strands of fluid stuck between said fingers.

A video now.

"Aaaaah~" Mina, in the video, was fucking herself furiously with her fingers on the couch. "Fuck~ [Y/N]~ you feel so fucking good~ fuck, fuck, fuck, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna- [Y/N]~"

Mina's scream of pleasure was accompanied by the gushing of fluids from her pussy. Her free hand rubbed her clit hard, prolonging her orgasm. Squirt after squirt of her juices shot out of her orgasming pussy, the sound of the liquid splashing all over the floor.

A final voice note.

"I could've squirted all over your cock, [Y/N]. It's a shame I had to fuck myself to an orgasm… I wish you'd been the one to fuck me to an orgasm before filling my slutty pussy with your cum. Think about that, [Y/N]. You could've made me cum screaming your name just like I did in the video…"

--

I could not sleep.

Every time I closed my eyes, all I could see was Mina grinding on the cushion on my lap, Mina biting her lips, Mina staring at me with pure lust and desire, Mina's pink pussy, shining with arousal, Mina fucking herself on her fingers, Mina squirting all over the living room screaming my name.

How was I going to sleep now?

--

Mina's soft voice. "Oh, are you sure?"

Mina was grinding on my lap again, as she unzipped her hoodie to show me her breasts. "Look at me, babe." She pulled the hoodie off her shoulders, letting it slip off and pool around her forearms and waist, exposing her beautiful breasts for my viewing pleasure. She grabbed my hand, placing it on her left breast. "Touch me."

I fondled her breast, kneading and squeezing it as moans of pleasure left her lips. Mina then brought a hand to the back of my head, pulling me into a torrid kiss. When we broke for air, I bent down to suckle on her right nipple while I pinched and pulled at her left, causing her to grind down harder, which led me to groan at the increased sensations down below. Mina bent backwards, allowing me easier access to her breasts, as she stroked my head, whispering, "Good boy, that feels so good~ mmmh~"

"Stop." I looked up at her in confusion, as she got off my lap. Slipping both thumbs under the waistband of her boyshorts, she pushed them off. Strings of her arousal clung to her pussy and her boyshorts. As she let her underwear drop, she also pulled off the hoodie around her forearms, dropping it on the floor, leaving her naked in front of me.

She straddled me once more, pulling the cushion on my lap away. "Look at how wet you've made me, baby." Her voice was deeper than usual, her lust and desire evident in the breathy tone of her voice as her fingers spread her glistening pussy open in front of my eyes, while she leaned back, placing an arm behind her to support herself. Her fingers moved up to circle her clit, as she smiled slyly. "I wish you'd said yes, [Y/N]." Her fingers moved to rub her clit directly. "You could've stripped me. You could've taken me to bed. You could've fucked me and made me a slut for your cock."

She pushed two fingers into herself, hilting them at her knuckles. "Mmmf~ fuck," She withdrew her fingers, then thrusted back in, repeating the motion. "This… this could've been your cock, [Y/N]." Every alternate word was broken up by a moan as she pushed her fingers into herself. "Instead of… ahhh~ fucking myself- mmmf~ I… I could be- hnng~ cumming on your cock, aaah~"

Mina threw her head back, a guttural moan erupting from deep within her. Her fingers appeared to curl within her, stimulating her G-spot. "Fuck," the curse word was drawn out in a hiss, "fuck, fuck, fuck, that feels so good, fuck~"

My gaze travelled over her body. My hands moved to try to touch her, but Mina was quick to grab me. "Ah, ah, no touching from now on." She snapped her fingers with the hand that she was using to support herself, leaning forward to stare deep into my eyes. Her smile was coy, but her eyes were menacing, as if daring me to disobey. As I tried to move my hands, I found them bound behind me with zip ties to the bed frame. Wait… bed frame??

How did I get to her room?

Mina tipped my chin up, forcing me to meet her eyes. "Only look at me, darling. I want you to watch." She had withdrawn her fingers from her pussy; they were dripping with her juices. She lifted them to her own mouth, opening wide and sucking on her own fingers. I could see her tongue move, swirling around her digits, cleaning her fingers of her own pussy juices before she released them with an audible 'pop'.

My cock strained hard against my track pants. The bulge of my cock was painful, my precum staining through my underwear and forming a wet spot at the tip of the bulge. I squirmed under her, resisting against the ties. Mina looked down at my bulge, a big smile on her face. "I'm feeling generous today, darling. Because you've been so good today, you get to cum." She snapped her fingers once more, and I was now naked, lying on the bed with my arms around my head, still tied at the wrists to the bed. In the back of my mind, I questioned how she was able to manipulate reality to her will like that, but that thought was shelved when she sank down, pushing my cock against my stomach. Her pussy lips wrapped around the underside of my cock, and she began to rub up and down the length.

Mina smirked, her eyes glazed over, drunk in power. "Mmmf~ so hard for me, darling? Were you… aaah~... this hard when you… nngh~... watched me cum?" She ground down hard, reaching behind her to cup and play with my balls. Every few words of hers were broken up with gasps of pleasure. "Did me cumming while moaning your name feel good? Does it feel good knowing you're the reason I fuck myself? That this pussy cums for you?" Her thrusts on my cock were beginning to speed up.

"Mina-"

Mina glared at me, stopping her grinding on my cock. I squirmed, attempting to grind on her for my own pleasure. She raised herself up, just out of my reach. "Shut the fuck up. You're my slut now. My toy. My personal stress relief. You listen to me, and me only. Speak only if I tell you to. Speak up again and I will leave." She then leaned in, her eyes looking at my lips, then to my eyes. Her left hand caressed my cheek, before her thumb ran over my lips. "Be a good boy, and I'll let you cum…" She then snapped her fingers again, and I no longer could speak, just moan in pleasure for her ears.

Mina lowered herself once more, grinding down hard. Her pussy was leaking copious amounts of her juices, making a mess of both our crotches. Slick sounds echoed around the room, her wetness evident both visually and audibly. "Darling, are you gonna cum for me just like I came for you? Are you going to paint yourself white for me?" She grinded down forcefully, her pants turning to whines and whimpers, before turning to actual moans, of which each was interrupting her speech. "Cum for me, toy. Cum for me like I'm going to cum for you. Show me the load you'd put in my pussy. Fuck, fuck, fuck! I'm gonna… fuck! I'm gonna-"

Mina's hips bucked up, her pussy gushing. The visuals of the first stream of her squirt prompted me to cum myself, my spurts violent. I could only feel the pleasure of my own orgasm; nothing else in the world mattered when everything was whited out. Dimly, I noted Mina's streams landing all over my body, drenching me all over, as well as the bed sheets. When I opened my eyes, I was covered in a messy mix of semen, sweat, and Mina's juices.

Mina's next words were "Wake up."

--

"Blurrgh!" I sat up awake in shock. What the fuck was that dream? Panting heavily, I leaned backwards, attempting to calm down my pounding heart. What the fuck just happened? Wiping my sweat on my brow, I stared at the ceiling in a daze.

As I shifted to kick the blankets away in order to dissipate the heat from my body, I could feel an uncomfortable stickiness all over my body… and even more at my crotch. Sure, I was sweating profusely and very warm from the dream, which explained the stickiness on my body… but on my crotch…

Oh. I'd ejaculated in my pants.

The large wet spot on the front of my shorts was evident enough that my cum had soaked through my underwear.

Fuck.

----------

[Mina's POV]

Yesterday evening, I sent [Y/N] his first nudes of me. Me fucking myself to a fantasy of him and then squirting all over his living room. If only he'd just given in and fucked me; its not like he didn't want my pussy. I would have squirted on his cock.

Fuck it. I'm gonna break him now.

If he'd just given in, I'd not only submit to him, I'd have been his slut to fuck. Now that he'd resisted me, I really want to break him and make him my slut.

Shy [Y/N], so cute and flustered under me.

Fanning my dirty thoughts away, I prepared to shower and take my leave to the dance studio for practice.

--

"Thanks for today guys! I'll stay back for a bit more practice!"

I waved bye to my fellow classmates, before returning to the studio. While I did intend to practice more, I also really wanted to send [Y/N] something naughty. Locking the door, I giggled to myself.

I was wearing just a sports bra and yoga pants. I snapped a pic of myself, posing with a peace sign for the camera, before sending it to [Y/N].

'I am coming back a bit later, I'm working on something right now.'

Little would he know, I was working on taking my bra off my body. I was now topless in the studio.

'How do you like my body?'

I then decided to work my leggings and panties down my legs, stripping until I was nude. Fuck, I felt so naughty being nude in the dance studio. Kneeling on the ground, I began to snap a few pictures of myself.

'Did you have fun watching me cum?'

I then took a video of myself, running the lens from my face to my breasts, then down to my pussy.

'Maybe next time, all this would be for you.'

Smirking naughtily, I put on some music, set my camera to film, before proceeding to dance in the nude.

----------

[Y/N's POV]

Mina sent me more nudes.

She was testing my patience, and I wasn't the most patient person in the world when it came to her.

The video of her performing Taemin's Move nude was even worse - those hips, that stare, her thighs, her plump ass, the jiggling of her breasts each time she moved, and… oh my god, when she swung her right leg in a circle and flashed her pussy for the world to see… She was testing me and I was very close to failing.

As I watched the video with my earbuds plugged in, Mina popped her head into my room, waving cheerfully. "Konnichiwa, [Y/N]! Why're you so red?" I was ashamed to say I fumbled and dropped the phone in my hands.

Mina giggled, hiding her beautiful gummy smile with her hand. "Hehehe, watching something… naughty? Something personal?" She smirked cheekily, before announcing, "I've got something on soon, I'll be having lunch outside~ See you!"

I groaned after she left, proceeding for a freezing shower to get rid of my dirty thoughts.

Mina's body is divine.

--

I hummed a tune as the bacon sizzled in the pan. Breakfast for lunch seemed like a pretty good idea, and I couldn't resist bacon.

As I plated my bacon and eggs...

'Ding!'

Hmm, what was this?

Oh, fuck. Mina was sending me pictures again. This time, she was thankfully clothed, but what she wore was just as hot as if she had sent me pictures of her nude body. Her ginger hair was tied up in a ponytail, and she had on a beautiful suit. She appeared to be in the bathroom, seeing that a sink could be seen in the mirror she was using as a photography tool.

Holy fuck.

Mina knew of my weakness for suits. I'd told her before that anyone that wore a suit was hot in my eyes because of how put together they looked. I'd admitted that people in a suit, especially ladies, sometimes made me intimidated and flustered.

A voice note this time. "Hi [Y/N] baby, don't you like how I dressed for you?"

Another picture came in. Mina now had her tie loosened, and her hand was pushing her hair back. The next picture had Mina with two of the buttons on her dress shirt unbuttoned, showing her cleavage, with her tie pushed aside. She had untied her hair, letting it frame her beautiful face.

"[Y/N]-ah, I'm stripping for you now… I know you like it~" A giggle. "Hehe, enjoy~"

Another picture. Mina's dress shirt was now fully unbuttoned, a lace bra cupping her perky breasts, her tie nowhere to be seen.

Even more pictures. Mina with her shirt unbuttoned, now without a bra, showing the valley between her breasts. Mina with the blazer around her biceps, off her shoulders. Mina without a blazer. Mina with the dress shirt now off her shoulders, around her arms, still covering her breasts but exposing the smooth, milky skin of her bare shoulders, and her defined collarbones.

'Ding!' Mina sent another picture, this time of her with the camera held up behind her untied hair, her bare back facing the camera, with her free hand held up in a peace sign.

With each picture, my dick grew harder and harder. She sent her killing blow next.

[ Myoui Mina is initiating a video call… ]

"Hey, [Y/N]~"

Mina was still in a state of undress, the camera held at face level, just enough to catch her bare shoulders and hints of her cleavage. The mirror behind her captured the beauty of her bare back.

"What the fuck, Mina? What're you doing?"

"Oh, darling~ you don't have to be so shocked, it's not like you haven't seen me before." She laughed, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "You had so much fun watching me finger myself to you. If I'd known you were watching, I'd have called you in so you could pound my pussy until you filled me with cum and my pussy milked all the cum from your balls."

The absolute filth spilled from Myoui Mina's lips was something I'd never have expected to hear in my lifetime. These few days showed that Mina was more than just my elegant, respectful, beautiful, and considerate housemate; she was also a woman with her sexual desires, wants, and needs, and she would stop at nothing to get what she wanted. In this case, she wanted me, and this was her way of doing so, through usage of her supple body and knowledge of my thinking processes and what ticked my checkboxes.

"I still have presents for you, baby. Guess what I'm doing right now?"

"Mina, I… Mina, what?"

"Yaaah~ you're not answering my question~ I'm doing something just for you, baby. Only for you." She winked, giving me a long gummy smile. "I'll let you see, chotto matte yo~~"

The screen shifted, now showing the white ceiling of the bathroom she was in. I heard the sounds of her belt unbuckling, and a short zip sound, before the camera was picked up again.

"Hihi, baby!" She panned the camera down, showing me her magnificent body… Oh. Oh. Her hand was in her pants, seemingly rubbing circles around her clit.

"Fuck~ that feels so good, mmmf~... Baby, I'm touching myself for you again~ This time… let Mommy show you what she does to her pussy when she thinks of you."

A whimper escaped my lips uncontrolled.

"Did Mommy's words turn you on, baby? Are you hard and twitching for me? Whip it out for me, baby. Flip the view. Show Mommy how much you like what you're seeing." Her deep and sultry tone, punctured with the occasional gasp and moan of pleasure, sent streaks of arousal straight down to my twitching dick, now leaking lots of precum. I swapped the view of my camera, pulling my pants down to set my cock free of its confinements within my shorts.

"Fuck baby, you're so fucking big… and so wet for Mommy. Jerk yourself for Mommy as Mommy strips for you." Mina propped the camera against the wall, turning around and pulling her trousers down with her panties. She bent over, flashing her ass and her drenched pussy to the camera as I jerked myself looking at her stripping. Mina turned around, placing her clothing out of the frame, standing in the bathroom naked.

"I'm glad no one ever comes here. Mommy can be loud and make a mess, and no one will know but you and me." Her lust-filled tone was turning me on more and more. Mina put her right hand down to her pussy, and her wrist curled up and she bit her lip and furrowed her brow, closing one eye. "Mmmf~, look baby," she put her hands closer to the camera, showing me the strands of her juices coating her fingers, "look at how wet Mommy is showing you what a slut she is. Mommy's a slut for your cock, baby. She wants your cock to fuck her pussy hard, to pound it until it cums and squirts all over you. Mommy wants you to fuck her until you fill her with cum and it leaks down her legs and thighs." She withdrew her hands from the camera, moving them back to her pussy as she picked up the camera and walked to an empty stall with a seating toilet, the cover already down. Sitting down on the toilet, Mina spread her legs, her fingers already penetrating her pussy and curling for her G-spot.

A sigh of pleasure released from Mina's open mouth as she leaned her head back. "Mommy's thinking… ah~... about your cock, baby…" Every few words she spoke were broken up with moans, sighs, hisses, or pants of pleasure. "I wish it was your cock in my pussy right now, baby. I wish you were kneeling and fucking into Mommy's slutty pussy as I spread for you. Don't you like that, baby? Don't you want Mommy's pussy around your cock?"

"Yes, Mina-"

Mina halted her actions. "What was that, baby?"

"I'm sorry, Mommy- fuck!" I jerked myself quicker, feeling myself edging slowly towards my orgasm at how Mina… no, Mommy had, so easily, made me submit to her.

Mina smiled. "What a filthy mouth. Mommy will let it slide this time, baby. Jerk yourself slow and good. I want you to come with Mommy. Not before, not after. Can you do that for Mommy, baby?"

"Yes, Mommy." I slowed my strokes down, disciplining myself to resist cumming first. Precum leaked out of the tip of my cock, lubricating the head. Whatever excess precum dripped to the ground.

Mina's bright smile on her face did not fit what filthy actions she was doing to herself, but that made it so much hotter. "Good job, baby. You're such a good boy. I promise you will enjoy your orgasm later. Hold on for me, okay?" She began to thrust faster and faster, moaning out loud each time her fingers curled over her G-spot. Her palm rubbed her clit with each thrust, slowly pushing her closer and closer to the edge of her release. "How does it feel, baby, to be watching me touch myself for you? Mommy's so wet and so horny watching you jerk yourself for her. Mommy's so happy you're dripping; it shows how happy you are to watch Mommy. Good job baby, I'm close, so close, fuck~"

"Mommy, fuck, I'm so close, so fucking close!"

Mina's sultry voice, broken with pants and moans, echoed from my speakers, "Yes, baby, cum for Mommy, cum with Mommy, fuck, I'm gonna, fuck-!"

"Fuck, Mommy, I'm coming!"

Mina's camera angle had switched to one from her point of view. The camera was now showing the door of the stall she was in, and her fingers furiously thrusting to bring herself to orgasm. Before she could finish her sentence, a long stream of fluid squirted from her pussy, her hand rushing to furiously rub her clit left and right, her squirt spraying all over the stall walls, floor, and door. She moaned gutturally as each stream exited, violent and strong. I could see her toes curling as she achieved her release.

The moment Mina squirted her first stream, semen shot out of the tip of my dick all over the floor. I bucked my hips into my hand, fucking my own hand to prolong my orgasm, as more spurts of cum shot out and created a puddle on the floor. As I collapsed to the floor, Mina's exhausted voice flowed to my ears, "Fuck baby, you came so much for Mommy… Good job, baby, Mommy came so much for you too." Mina's smile could be heard through the speakers. "You did so well for me… Mommy's proud of you. Now go clean up, Mommy will be back for dinner."

"Yes Mommy, thank you Mommy."

Mina giggled, the camera flipping to see Mina gazing at her drenched hand, covered in a coating of her squirt. Mina gave her hand multiple licks from top to bottom, as if she was sucking on a cock, all while her eyes never left the camera. I licked my dry lips, watching Mina clean herself.

"Maybe next time, it'll be your cock I'm licking."

[ Myoui Mina has ended the call. ]

My food was long cold by then.

----------

[Mina's POV]

As I rested on the toilet seat, recovering from my mindblowing orgasm, I smiled thinking of [Y/N]'s moans and submission to me. Making him call me Mommy turned me on so much that I'd squirted the most I had ever in my life; the stall I was in was covered in my juices. My squirt was flowing down the walls, the door, and dripping onto the ground, forming large puddles, as if someone had just showered.

Watching his cock spurt out so much semen was such a turn on, as well as knowing he'd just fucked himself for me. What an obedient little pet, so turned on and so wet just for me just by listening to my instructions. A good pet deserves a reward…

As I cleaned myself up, as well as the stall, and got dressed, I thought about how to seduce him one last time into my bed. I'm going to milk my pet for all he's worth.

I'm going to fuck him until I'm satisfied. I have waited long enough.

His reward will be my body.

--

"[Y/N], tadaima!"

I unlocked the front door to our shared apartment, dressed in the suit I'd used in our sex session over video. The aroma of fried rice wafted from the kitchen, accompanied by a "Shit!" and the sound of something dropping. Running to the kitchen, I was met with a red-faced [Y/N], picking up two spoons and forks from the ground. "Okaeri, Mo- Mina-ya." I smiled at his little slip of the tongue.

I walked over to him as he went to wash up the dropped utensils. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I leaned into his back, giving him a hug. "Thank you for cooking, [Y/N]." His body was so tense under my touch. He smelled really nice…

"Y-You're wel- welcome, Mina." His nerves were evident in his shaky and unsure voice. Turning him around as he dried his hands, I now embraced him from the front, burying my face into the crook of his neck. I felt [Y/N] finally wrap his arms around me, sinking into me just like I was sinking into his embrace.

"[Y/N]-ah, thank you for today too." I smiled at his sound of confusion, before I caressed his cheek with my hand. "Today's video call. I've never been so turned on in my life, and I've never cummed this hard before. And I did it with you. Thank you." With each word, [Y/N] got redder and redder, and he seemed to tense up, leaning away from me slightly, specifically his crotch. It was pretty clear why, but I did not want to embarrass him at this point. "Hey, don't get shy on me now," I said, flashing my gummy smile, "you've literally seen my naked body more than I've seen yours, from when you peeped on me to earlier today. I should be the mortified one here." Apologies spilled from [Y/N]'s mouth, but I silenced him with a finger on his lips. "It's okay, baby, I don't mind now, and I didn't mind then. However, I really have something I want off my chest now."

I took a deep breath in, then released it.

"Before I proceed with any of my other plans tonight, I kind of want to address the situation you caught me in on Thursday." I bit my lip, fiddling with my fingers. "Yes, I was fantasizing about you, and… I'm kind of ashamed you had to see that. I did not want to have you realise I think of you like that in that manner." Raising my hands to wrap around the back of [Y/N]'s neck, I stared into his eyes. "I like you, and I think you're hot."

[Y/N]'s eyes widened, before he pulled me into another hug, this one tighter than the rest. "Mina, thank you." His smile could be heard in his voice. "I like you too." As he withdrew, his hands trailed down my forearms to my hands, firmly clasping them in his. "I have something to say too. I'm sorry I peeped on you. I know you said you were cool, but I should have done better and not watched you. That was your private time and I should be respecting it, but I watched instead with perverted desires. This has been eating away at me, and I feel so sorry- mmph!"

I crashed my lips into his, yanking the collar of his tee to get him low enough to be able to take my kiss. I felt him lean into the kiss, reciprocating with as much desire for this as I had. As I pulled him closer, our kiss deepened, and my hands wrapped around his head while his arms wrapped around my waist.

We broke our kiss for air. I smiled, panting hard. "You were rambling, babe. It's okay, I'm fine with it. Let's have dinner before the food gets cold." I took [Y/N]'s hand, leading him to the table, draping my blazer over my chair, before proceeding to eat.

Dinner was a relatively quiet affair. [Y/N] couldn't hide his happiness as he seemed to have a dazed smile on at all times, and I was just watching him be his happiest. This was the cutest I'd ever seen him, and for the past year, I had seen so many moments of him being cute - when he was sleepy, when he was focusing on his work, when he was enthusing about his day or his interests, and that one time he cuddled me at my request. This was now the cutest I'd ever seen him and I was content just to watch him bask in his happiness.

I still want to bed him though.

--

As we walked back to our rooms after dinner, I stopped [Y/N] at my room. "[Y/N]-ah, wait." When he turned to face me, a smile on his face, I beckoned him with a wave. Tiptoeing to his ear, I whispered, "Shower with me." The look of disbelief on his face made me laugh. "I mean it, [Y/N], shower with me. I'll wait for you~"

Oh, the plans I have for him, and all of it ends with us sleeping together tonight.

Grabbing my towel from my room after untying my tie, I made my way to [Y/N]'s room. As I strided in, I grabbed [Y/N]'s hand, pulling him from his room. "Mina! I haven't picked my clothes yet! Mina!" I smiled at him as I carried on pulling him towards the bathroom. "You won't need those later, darling." Pulling him into the bathroom, I locked the door, then turned and pinned him against the wall, releasing the control I had on my lust for him.

"Mina?! Wha-?!" I forcefully pulled him in for a kiss, before releasing him and smirking. I rubbed his crotch over his shorts, pulling him for another forceful kiss, but this one softer and slower. His hands were also slowly roaming my body, first around my waist, then slowly moving downwards to knead my ass. Fuck, that felt so good…

I broke our second kiss. "Why don't you strip for me, baby?" I smiled, leaning back on the sink. I could see the arousal and fear rise in [Y/N]'s eyes, and as he set his towel down on the rack. I set mine down as well, before turning to him. "No, really. We're showering. Of course we're stripping. I'll strip too."

[Y/N] slowly pulled off his shirt, revealing inch by inch of his solid core muscles, his pectorals, his biceps, triceps… oh my God, he was so fucking hot. I couldn't help but just stare at the new amount of skin in my line of sight, forgetting to take off my clothing too. When he pushed his shorts and briefs down, I watched his hard cock spring out, and a rush of wetness flowed down my pussy. As he looked up at me, he rushed to cover his hard cock, sticking out in front of him. I laughed, before grabbing both his wrists and pulling his hands away. "It's okay [Y/N], it's natural. I'm wet for you too." He groaned, his dick twitching once. "Mina~," he whined, "don't say that! It's embarrassing…" Smiling, I moved closer to him and tiptoed to give him a peck on his lips. "You're so cute, [Y/N]. And… you're so big…" He groaned again, and I kissed him once more. "Fine, fine. I'm gonna strip now."

I could see his eyes darting to me and looking away as I unbuttoned my dress shirt. I'd already untied my tie in my room. He was very embarrassed and quite aroused as he looked at me undressing; the precum was starting to form at the slit on the tip of his red, angry, hard cock. How would that cock feel in my pussy? That thought made a rush of heat fill my loins. I pulled my shirt off, hands moving to unclip my bra, when I heard [Y/N] go, "Wait." He walked over, putting two hands on my arms, and turning me around. "It's awkward standing there… let me." His hands moved up to the clip of the bra. "Can I?"

Oh, he… that was so lovable of him. Beaming at him, I nodded yes. I felt his hands reach the clip, unclipping both ends of the bra. He aided me in removing it from my arms, and I took it off, turning around to show him my bare breasts. He gasped, eyes wide, staring at them, before closing his open mouth, unable to tear his eyes away. I giggled, tilting his chin up. "My eyes are up here, dummy, hehe."

"You're beautiful, Mina. Oh my God." The compliment took me off guard, my hands rushing to cover my face as I whined. "I'm shy~! Don't say that!" He laughed, pulling on my hands, then planting his lips on my forehead. Putting my hands down to the buckle of my belt, I undid my belt, then bent down, sliding both my pants and panties off me. I noticed a wet spot on my panties, and after I pulled the last of my clothing off and stood back upright, I could see [Y/N]'s red face, his eyes roaming my naked body, and his dick twitched once more, making my pussy wetter. "Let's shower, babe," I said, "if we wait any longer I might not be able to hold back." Pulling him into the shower, I turned on the water.

----------

[Y/N's POV - Post Shower]

The shower with Mina was uneventful. We were both kind of self conscious, but we got through the shower, albeit with a few lustful stares at each other, and smirks exchanged each time we caught each other. I could not believe my awfully sexy housemate was naked and showering somewhat comfortably with me. With that said, I was aroused almost all the time, watching a Mina with wet hair and droplets of water drawing streaks down the curves of her chest or the valley in the middle of her breasts, running down her toned core, her creamy thighs, her developed calves, and the worst of all - I'd watch some of the droplets run, and they'd reach her pussy… I had to tear my eyes away. I'd caught her staring at my own fit body too. Her hungry eyes ran over my arms, my chest, my core, down my legs, and every once in a while, right at my hard cock. We'd laugh each time we caught the other, but the sexual tension in the bathroom was so thick. It was clear what we would do post-shower, but I was hoping for something soft and slow, which I'd wanted with her for so long.

As I dried my hair off, I looked at Mina towelling herself off, her hair still wet. Reaching over with my own towel, I wrapped the towel around her head, drying her hair for her. She looked up at me in surprise, and all I could do was smile at how adorable she was. It was funny how a naked woman in front of me was the most adorable creature in the world at the moment, and not the sexiest. After we were dry, Mina smirked, and dragged me by the hand, leading us through the house naked. After hurriedly putting our towels out to dry, she dragged me to her room, giggling to herself as she pushed me onto her bed.

I leaned against the headrest of the bed, my eyes widening at how quick Mina was - she was now crawling towards me seductively, her lust and desire evident in her half-lidded eyes. Mina bit her bottom lips, her plump ass high in the air, her perky breasts swaying left and right as she crawled. My half-erect cock slowly hardened and grew, which Mina took notice of, and giggled. As she got closer, she rose up to straddle me, kneeling above my hard shaft. Lowering herself to meet me eye to eye, she wrapped her arms around my neck, putting her lips close to mine.

"Hi, baby." She smiled, my favourite gummy smile, with her eyes becoming slits. "Hey, Mina," I breathed, mesmerised by the juxtaposition of Mina's adorable smile in front of my face and the awfully sinful body she possessed, exposed to all of my sight. My eyes locked on to her thighs, the thick creamy expanse of skin just begging to be touched and caressed, and then to her breasts, which I'd always dreamed of fondling. Mina watched me check her body out for the umpteenth time, before tilting my chin up to meet her gaze. "Kiss me."

Our lips drew closer, feeling each other's hot breath on the other's lips. When our lips met, Mina seemed to push into me, her hands cradling the back of my head and neck while I loosely wrapped my hands around her shoulders. We exchanged multiple kisses, each of them short pecks, as our hands began to wander. Mina brought one of her hands down to my shoulders, then to my biceps, giving them a squeeze. Her other hand moved down onto my other shoulder, and she broke our latest kiss, staring lovingly into my eyes. "Mommy wants it slow with you, darling. Can you be good for me tonight?"

A whimper broke free from my throat as I nodded in submission, my cock twitching once. Mina being my Mommy was the sexiest thing I'd ever heard in my life, and knowing that I'd be her good boy turned me on so much.

Mina's smile graced her features once more, softening my heart once again. "You've been my good boy these few days, taking all my teasing so well. Tonight, Mommy will reward you with her body." She leaned in to touch her forehead with mine, another giggle reaching my ears. "Enjoy your reward baby." Giving me a final peck, she reached for my cock, giving it a tight squeeze, before gripping it and stroking up and down, her eyes once again lustful. "Does my hand feel good, baby? How does it feel?"

I had moaned at her first touch. Finally, there was some reprieve from the pent-up sexual frustration and tension between us for the past few days. Now, she was finally relieving me of some of the pressure I was feeling because of her. Her dainty fingers wrapped around my shaft, stroking it up and down, sending sparks of pleasure up and down my groin. Even when she was masturbating me, she looked elegant, as if she wasn't indulging herself in sexual activity with her housemate, but instead, playing a musical instrument. As she stroked, she met eyes with me, expecting my answer. "F-fuck, Mommy, your hand feels so good, oh my gosh!" Mina stroked faster, her eyes gleaming with mischief, as she began to talk dirty to me.

"Mommy's been wanting your cock for a long time, baby. Each time I see you shirtless, I've always wanted to jump you and fuck myself senseless on your cock. Sometimes, I want to be under you as you make me your slut, your cum dumpster, and just a hole for you to fuck. Don't you like that, baby? Hearing me beg for your cum, fucking my tight body as and when you like, in any position you want?" Her hand sped up, her words conjuring mental images that took me closer and closer to my release. "Or maybe my mouth. You could be plowing my mouth, dumping your load down my throat. Maybe even my lubed ass, you could be fucking my ass until I squirt all over the bed and my thighs. Do you want Mommy to be your slut, baby? Mommy could just be three holes for you to cum in, baby. Mommy can be your cumslut, your personal toy to cum in, or cum on. How about that, baby?"

The filth from Mina's mouth was easily the hottest string of words to ever grace my ears. I'd wanted Mina for ages, but I'd never expected her to be this dominating. She began to thumb the head of my cock, spreading the precum at the tip all over. "So wet for Mommy, baby. Are you cumming soon? Do you wanna glaze Mommy with your cum? I'll let you cum on me. Take your choice, baby. Do you want to cum on my breasts, my abs? My thighs? My ass, my back? Choose quickly, baby." Her hand stroked harder, and I instinctively exclaimed "Your breasts!"

"Good choice, darling. Cum for Mommy, cover Mommy with your love!" Mina fell back, spreading her legs to let me flush myself to her as I jerked myself to orgasm. My first shot landed all over her right breast, the second landing on the left. The next few shots glazed her sweaty torso, adding to the glistening of her sweat. Mina watched my cock spurt, delight and lust adorning her features, as she watched her baby dirty her body. Her hand thumbed my cock head once more, collecting the stray drips of cum, before she brought the thumb to her lips, licking my semen off it, as if it were some delicacy. Her other hand began to collect the sticky mess all over her torso and chest, scooping it up and pouring it in her mouth. Her tongue swirled in her mouth, mixing the semen with her saliva, before she sat up, opened her mouth to show me my cum, then swallowing it, before showing me her empty mouth. She giggled, before shifting to allow me line of sight to her wet pussy. Mina spread her labia open. The wet sound of the lips separating sent arousal down to my softening dick. Mina noticed that, and smiled. "Take your rest, baby. Come, please Mommy."

I shifted Mina to rest against me, her back leaning against my body. Placing my head near her right shoulder, I began to kiss her nape and towards the shoulder, teasing her a little. I kissed her up and down her neck, breathing on it once in a while, which got her whimpering and shuddering in anticipation and pleasure. My hands wrapped around Mina's body, one snaked around her core to keep her flush to me, the other firmly grasped her breast, kneading it to pleasure her. I was finally touching her body, and I intended to worship it.

Mina turned to me, her neediness and lust evident in her expression and tone. "Darling, don't tease me. Mommy isn't so patient." I caught her lips in a passionate kiss, my tongue sliding against her lower lip for access. When she granted me access, our tongues met, lazily swirling against the other, as we made out with each other. We broke our kiss, panting. "Mommy, please be patient." I gave her a short peck. "I want to worship Mommy's body."

I returned to kneading her breast as I kissed her neck, sucking and biting on certain spots. I fingered her erect nipple, pinching it and circling it, leading her to moan beautifully, the outlet of her pleasure music to my ears. Knowing that what I was doing was pleasing her turned me on so much. My dick flared to life, slowly hardening against her back, growing in size and girth. This did not escape Mina's notice, as she giggled. "Hehe, someone's happy~" I smiled against her ear, whispering, "I can't wait to fuck your pussy, Mommy, but you'll have to wait." Mina shuddered at my breath hitting her, which I filed as a potential spot to focus on.

I switched positions with Mina, letting her lie on the bed. I cradled her head and placed her softly on the pillow, before I straddled her and began to work on her neck once more, marking her neck with hickeys as she moaned at my ministrations on her neck. I bit on her earlobe and sucked, and Mina twitched at the pleasure, a loud moan escaping her lips. She was so fucking sexy moaning like that, and I felt precum flow out of my tip. Furthering my actions on her earlobe, Mina writhed around on the bed in pleasure, moaning a mixture of "Baby", "[Y/N]", or wordless sounds of pleasure. I began to kiss down from her neck, giving her butterfly kisses as I journeyed to her clavicle. I gave her a few kisses on her clavicle, hot openmouthed kisses as I licked the sweat on her pleasured body. The salty taste of her sweat did not bother me; my objective was to worship her body and make her cum with my mouth and fingers.

My journey down her body brought me to the swell of her bosom, her beautiful breasts begging to be pleasured. They heaved with each of Mina's laboured pants, her pert nipples waving in the air, tempting me to suckle and bite down on them. My dick twitched at the thought, precum once again flowing down to reach the tip, a little bit spurting out and dirtying the sheets. Mina's breasts were gorgeous and I could lose myself playing with them if I was left unchecked. I began to kiss down her cleavage, giving each breasts alternating pecks, licking and tonguing her flesh. Her warm body reciprocated earnestly; she writhed in lust, moaning as I kissed up each breast and around her nipples, but not quite touching them. "Mommy, can I…" my question trailed off as Mina looked up and nodded vigorously, silently begging for me to finally touch her sensitive nipples. When my tongue came into contact with her left nipple, my left hand pinched and tugged at her right, leading her hips to buck as pleasure coursed through her veins. "Aaaah~," she moaned, her right hand coming up to grip my hair. I gave her hardened nipple a few sucks, my tongue flicking it up and down, once in a while giving it a soft nibble. My hand carried on pinching and tugging her other nipple, while my other hand, which was supporting myself, reached over to grasp hers and hold it. "Baby, shit, that feels so good, fuck! Mommy feels so good baby, so so good~ aaah, shit~" Mina was enjoying the waves of pleasure crashing against her body. Her body was so warm, her beautiful features depicting the pleasure of the sexual activity she was engaging in.

I released her nipple from my mouth, blowing on it. The contrast of the cool air and the warmth of her body led her to squeak, as I blew on her nipple, then kissed it. Soon enough, I had swapped to her other nipple, suckling and nibbling the right nipple while fondling her left breast. All of this fueled Mina's desperation to finally have some action below. "Baby, fuck, eat Mommy out. Quickly!" I began to journey down towards her pussy, kissing all the way down her torso, her abs, her hip bones, and then down both her thighs. I spread Mina's legs open, my cock twitching at the amount of juices that was leaking out of Mina's pussy. Below where she lay, there was a large wet spot, and I could see how much her pussy glistened and clenched on nothing, as she begged, "Baby, quick!"

Our dynamics had switched, even though I was still calling her Mommy. I enjoyed the rush of power I had, and I began to kiss and lick down Mina's inner thighs, teasing her once more. I kissed down her left thigh, giving it a few licks, as she panted and hissed in pleasure. Doing the same for the other leg, I spared myself a glance at Mina's beautiful pussy. "Please, baby, eat Mommy, please!" Mina was so desperate she was pushing herself towards my mouth. I smiled, blowing on her clit, as she groaned in frustration. Finally, I gave her a lick around her pussy, tasting her juices but not giving her the relief she so craved. "Baby, please~ Ah~!!" I gave her slit one strong lick, gathering her juices all on my tongue, before swallowing what was in my mouth. Returning to her slit, I began to lick and suck on what I could, which was slowly driving Mina wild, as she grabbed my head and forced my mouth towards her pussy. I gave her a few more licks before I decided to push her quicker to the edge by involving my fingers. As I moved to kiss her clit, I began to rub my fingers over the slit, lubricating them for entry. Each kiss or lick on Mina's clit set off her melodic moans, groans, pants, and hisses. Occasionally, she would moan my name and I would double my efforts on her clit, which would set off small gushes of fluid onto my fingers.

"Mommy, can I put my fingers inside?" I looked up at Mina, our eyes meeting. She smiled and nodded, her smiling face quickly changing to one of pleasure as I penetrated her with my middle finger, thrusting in and out. I returned to kiss and suck on her clit, driving Mina crazy. "Fuck, baby, fuck, fuck, fuck! That feels so good, aaah~! Oh my, your fingers… fuck!" Deciding to increase her pleasure, I added my ring finger to the mix, continuing my kisses, sucks, and licks on her hard clit. Each time I thrusted in, I curled my fingers, looking for her G-spot. After a few strokes, I heard Mina squealing, "Fuck, baby, there! Right there! Fu- Fuck! Yes, yes, yes, yes!" I focused my strokes to aim at that spot, as Mina bucked her hips wildly with each stroke, pushing my head into her crotch. I decided to swap my fingers with my tongue, hearing Mina's disappointment at the withdrawal of my fingers, then a gasp of delight as I stuck my tongue into her delicious pussy. I licked and sucked from her pussy directly, drinking whatever juices she could offer. My wet fingers rubbed around and on her clit, and I could hear her going "Fuck, if you keep that… if- if- aah~ if you keep that going- fuck- I'm going to cum! Fuck!" Mina's filthy mouth only spurred me to work harder on eating her out - I wanted to drink her in literally.

I began to hasten my motions on her clit, and focus on her G-spot, and only that spot, with my tongue. Mina's hips began to buck wildly, her moans and words building to a crescendo. "Oh, fuck! Fuck! [Y/N], baby, fuck! Don't stop, baby, don't stop! Fuck! I'm going to cum, I'm going to cum, I'm going to cum! Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES, YES, YESYESYES- AAAAAAAHHHH~~~!!!!"

Mina squirted. Her juices gushed from her pussy, spraying onto my lips and into my mouth. I wrapped my mouth around her pussy, drinking her squirt in. The sweet taste of her juices flooding my mouth sent my lust for her through the roof. Her hips wildly bucking, the shrill screams resembling a whistle resonating around the room, her orgasming pussy clenching around nothing...

Rising from my position between her legs, I crawled onto the bed, wiping my lips with my hand. "Mina, are you okay?" I caressed her cheek, leaning in for a kiss. Mina nodded, exhausted and high off the post-orgasm afterglow, giving me a beautiful eye smile, meeting my lips for that kiss. We made out again, our tongues swirling around each other lazily, basking in each other's company. Mina smiled at me, kissing my forehead. "There are condoms in the second drawer."

----------

[Mina's POV]

I gave [Y/N]'s hard cock a kiss after putting the condom on him. I rose up to him, giving him a kiss, before pushing him onto the bed and straddling him.

"Thank you for earlier, baby, but now… now you're going to fuck Mommy's pussy until Mommy cums all over your cock and you fill that condom with your seed." I aligned myself with [Y/N]'s cock, slowly sinking down. The tip of [Y/N]'s cock parted my labia, and I began to tease him, rubbing his tip along my pussy lips. He moaned, frustration evident on his face at my teasing. "I know you want to cum, baby. I know you want to fuck Mommy's tight slutty pussy until you fill my hole with cum. However, I call the shots here babe, and I want to see you squirm. This slutty body may be your reward tonight baby, but I'm not such an easy slut. If you please me, baby, I'll make sure you get the full extent of your reward. Ready yourself, babe."

Without warning, I sank down on the entire length of [Y/N]'s cock. I sheathed the entirety of his hard shaft in my naughty pussy, a loud moan erupting from my lips as he stretched my pussy. [Y/N]'s loud "Fuck!" and other curses was indicative enough of the pleasure he felt penetrating me for the first time. I supported myself on [Y/N]'s chest, my teeth gritted at the fullness I felt. Smirking, I cradled [Y/N]'s head, locking eyes with him. "You're not allowed to cum until I'm satisfied. If you cum, I'll make sure, next time, I'll strip you, tie you up, and ruin every orgasm you have. Are we crystal clear, baby?"

"Yes, Mommy." [Y/N] was such a good boy. So obedient, so eager to please. If he kept this up, he'd get to enjoy more of my body next time.

'Pak, pak, pak.' The sound of flesh slapping flesh began to ring around my room as I raised my hips and sank back down, riding [Y/N]'s cock. Moan after moan left my lips, unfiltered. I decided to torture [Y/N] with more dirty talk, just to tempt him into cumming. "How does it feel… ahh~... having Mommy… hff~... fuck your cock, baby? How does it feel- oh, fuck! ...knowing you're Mommy's new toy? Fuck, that feels so good…. You're mine to fuck. Anytime. Anywhere." I could feel myself squeezing his cock harder thinking about how he was now mine to fuck as and when I wanted, and with each time I impaled myself on his cock, he would let out the sexiest moans, his eyes clouded with pleasure and lust for me, tinged with obedience and fear. Halting my actions, I grinded down on him, going in circles as I smiled at [Y/N] gritting his teeth and trying not to blow his load. "You can't come yet, [Y/N]~, not until Mommy's slutty pussy cums on her new favorite toy~."

As I grinded down on him, I leaned over, putting my chest in front of his face. "Suck on the breasts you love, babe. I can tell- ah!" [Y/N] latched on instantly, thrusting up and sucking on my left nipple, fondling my right breast. "Oh my god, fuck, that feels so good! I can tell you've… ahh! You've… fuck, you've wanted this, haven't you, baby? Shit, mmmh~, suck on the tits you love so much, baby. Make Mommy cum." I panted in pleasure as [Y/N] fucked up into my pussy, my hips matching his thrusts. "Fuck Mommy's pussy until Mommy cums. If you make me cum, I'll let you fuck me how you want, and you can finally fill that condom."

[Y/N] kept his thrusts up as he fucked into me hard. I was getting closer and closer to orgasm; his sucking on, paired with occasional biting and pinching of my sensitive nipples sent pleasure all over my body. Sweat dripped down my body, running down my neck and chest, which [Y/N] licked up whenever he decided to attack my neck and breasts with licks and kisses.

"Oh shit, babe. Fuck me just like that! Yes! Right there, yes!" [Y/N] had angled himself under me to hit my G-spot once more, and every thrust he was making was hitting that exact spot. He groaned in pleasure and exertion as he thrusted harder, gritting his teeth and furrowing his brows as he focused on not cumming in the condom once more, pushing himself to ensure I came on his cock.

"Fuck, baby, yes, yes, yes, yes, I'm gonna cum!"

My pussy squeezed down on his cock as I saw white and fell into his embrace. I could feel my back arch, pushing myself towards him, as I trembled and he fucked me through my orgasm, prolonging it.

"Oh, Mommy. Now it's my turn."

----------

[Y/N's POV]

Mina had her orgasm. Now it was my turn.

I flipped us so I was on top of her now, her legs wrapped around my hips. Mina's exhausted eyes stared into mine in surprise, and a devilish grin met her gaze. "Do you know how hard it was fucking you without being able to cum? Now I get to fuck your slutty pussy." I slowly began to thrust once more, Mina moaning at my movements. "Finally. Finally I get to fuck this pussy the way I like it."

I pushed my cock in her pussy ever so slowly, hearing her groan in frustration as I slid in one slow centimeter by one slow centimeter. "Mommy wants it faster, huh? Fine, I'll give you fast." I began to fuck her with quick, hard strokes, of which each was from head to hilt. "Fuck, baby, fuck, your cock feels so good in my pussy, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, oh my god, yes, oh my god-" Mina was slowly losing the ability to make coherent sentences as I gave her a hard fucking. Her vocabulary consisted of the phrase "Oh my God", the words "Fuck", "Shit", and "Yes", as well as mindless moans of pleasure.

Catching Mina's lips in a heated kiss, I kept the pace and power of my thrusts even as we made out once more, her arms wrapped around me as I held her head in my hands and arms. She moaned into the kiss, wrapping her legs around my hips as I fucked her pussy with short strokes, chasing my orgasm.

I decided to taunt Mina just as she'd taunted me so many times. "I can feel your pussy clenching around my cock, Mommy. Does this turn you on that much? Knowing that I'm using your slutty pussy just so I can cum? I've wanted you like this for so long, Mommy, under me, being my cockslut. Does my cock feel good, Mommy? Does it feel good being fucked like that? Like you're nothing but a hole for my cock to fill?"

It wasn't long before I exclaimed, "Fuck, Mommy, I'm cumming!" I'd gone beyond the point of no return through both my dirty talk and Mina's reactions to said talk. She'd looked so pleasured and fucked out, and she could only nod and moan at my words, her pussy squeezing my cock as she got more and more aroused hearing my words. Mina had pulled my body flush against hers as she achieved another orgasm, her pussy milking my cock as I felt my balls tighten and my cock pulse, each pulse firing off stream after stream of thick, hot semen. I'd not been able to last long after I'd nearly blown my load multiple times - once when Mina had begun to talk dirty to me, a few times when I'd fucked into her, and the toughest was when she came the first time. Both of us released guttural moans as we orgasmed in each other's embrace, Mina pulling me in tightly, and as I cradled her head and buried myself in her neck.

--

I pulled out of Mina's freshly fucked pussy, my cock easily slipping out of the used condom after. I threw the used condom away, making my way back to the kitchen. Getting 2 cups of water, I returned to Mina's side, placing the cups on her bedside table and pulling her exhausted self up to a sitting position. Mina panted with exhaustion, sweat still running down her body. I ruffled her sweat matted hair, kneeling down to meet her eyes. "Are you okay, Mina? Was I too rough?" Mina gave me a tired eye smile, before shaking her head. "No, baby. It was perfect." She caught me in a slow passionate kiss, conveying what her exhausted brain could not with words. I smiled, offering her a cup of water, which she chugged.

"Come on, babe, let's shower again."

--

As I scrubbed Mina's hair, she softly called "[Y/N]..."

"Yes, Mina?"

"It's Sunday tomorrow…" She poked her fingers together, turning to me with her soapy hair. "I know it's not the right order, but… date tomorrow?"

Oh, my heart. She was pouting and giving me puppy eyes. Puppy eyes! Pouting! Poking her fingers together! She was ADORABLE!!!

I ruffled her hair with my soapy hands, smiling. "Of course, Mina. Date tomorrow." Mina grin equalled that of the power of the Sun, and she "vibrated" excitedly. I brought her into a tight hug, the water running over us.

"Let's finish up and go to bed, Mina."

--

The next morning, I woke up to Mina straddling my body once more. "Oh- uh.. wha-? Good morning, Mina..?"

Oh, she had that glint in her eyes… and she was gripping my morning wood.

"Baby, I see you're happy to see me~" She rubbed up and down the length, pulling it out of my shorts. "Get ready for Round 2, baby~ The date can wait..."

"You're mine until I'm done with you."

--- END ---

[yeojaa]

come over, pt. i

pairing.  jjk x f!reader.  rating.  explicit.  tags.  this is pwp.  smut in the forms of:  kissing, oral (m/f), fingering, deepthroating, hickeys, protected sex.  use of the pet name shy girl.  wc. 6.2k.  beta reader.  @hobi-gif and @snackhobi aka the loves of my tiny life.  author note.  this is an adaption of an rp with my beloved @velvetwicebang​.  while the writing is all my own, i owe so much to loma for inspiring me and being such a wonderful partner. 💛 if you enjoy this, feedback goes a long way.  tysm for reading!  (and yes, there will be a second part.)

You’ve been friends for thirteen months, classmates for another three before that.  You’ve worked on countless projects together, watched him fall off a roof, and have had to bail him out of campus security’s grubby little hands. Your friendship is easy, based on mutual suffering in Professor Kim’s class and long study dates spent in the library.  He smuggled you chocolates in his pockets and you brought iced coffee to the 8 a.m. lecture you shared.

You’re not sure why you’re riddled with uncertainty now then, every nerve ending shot, lit up bright like the still-up mini Christmas tree sitting in the corner of your dorm room.  (You know you should take it down but it’s so cute, slouched ever with a tiny gold star-shaped bell hanging from the end.).  

Spending time with Jungkook was normal - a part of your weekly routine - but then again, you hadn’t somehow developed a weird little crush on him until recently.  

(If you think hard, you could probably pinpoint it to a night a few weeks ago when he looked particularly good, fluffy powder puff of hair stripped of shadow and gleaming gold beneath the warm lecture lights.  You’d never had a thing for blonds but he made it look good - surprising you when he’d dropped into his seat beside you and winked in response to your surprise.) 

(It’s something you can't tear your thoughts from now, that infuriatingly charming smile burnt into your retinas.  It sits at the forefront of your mind, stealing your attention from the movie that's playing on the television hung across from your bed.  One of those blockbuster flicks, because who didn’t love gratuitous action and lens flares?)

A hand reaches for the chip bowl propped between you - homemade chex mix, because you’ve been obsessed with the recipe since discovering it a few weeks ago - and you flinch away when it brushes the hand that's already in there.

"Sorry!"  You squeak before coughing, a quick-witted (but not altogether believable) attempt at hiding the sudden heat that flares across your cheeks.  The same hand disappears between your knees, fingers curling into the soft throw laid over your legs.  You tell yourself to relax at least three times before speaking, peeking at your companion from beneath a fringe of sleep-tousled strands.  “Stop stealing all my chips.” 

The boy beside you only grins, tosses that lazy smile in your direction before turning his attention back to the explosion on the screen, entire expression lit up by the fireworks that explode in flashes of colour.

You think you’ve gotten away with it - that he hasn’t noticed - and then he’s speaking again, pointedly staring forward, seemingly unbothered.  (You know better though.  Jungkook’s infuriating like that, picking up on all the little things despite the fact that he’s a dumb boy, too good at reading between the lines when he barely studies.)

“You’re blushing.”

The callout is, well, uncalled for. 

You choose to ignore him at first, opting to shove two chocolates past your lips.  They’re unbearably sweet, minty and cold - your favourite - and the richness spills across your tongue, eliciting a soft hum as your teeth buzz from the sugar.  (Note to self:  thank Jungkook for the chocolate later.)

“You’re blushing,”  you retort once you’ve swallowed, cheeks puffed out and a dent gathering between your brows.  “I’m just—“  Hand waves wildly - nearly hits him in the face with how wobbly it is - and you pretend-glare at him, faux affront laid in spades.  “—hot.”

It comes snappier than you mean it to, spoken in something close to a pout.  You aren’t actually.  The campus is notorious for having garbage heating, floorboards more akin to packed snow in the dead of winter.  It’s just annoying.  You refuse to be another one of those girls.

(Not that there’s anything wrong with said girls.  It’s more an issue with Jungkook, stupidly handsome and charming and far too popular for his own good.  People already told you all about Jungkook’s escapades - even though you often heard them from him firsthand and in gruelling detail.  One of the downsides to being friends with someone who, for all intents and purposes, carried the title of campus heartthrob.) 

“Pay attention to the movie.”  The same hand reaches for the mix again, careful to avoid brushing his this time.  You think you’ve succeeded, snatching up a piece of pretzel, morsel halfway to your mouth when it drops to your lap.

The same lap that suddenly has a hand on it, palm warm over your knee.  

If you’d thought your nerve endings were shot, now you knew they were.  Every inch of skin was on fire - heat shooting up your spine and over your neck the moment his hand comes in contact with bare skin.  Damn your need for comfort, damn your choice to wear shorts, damn his freaking hot tattooed hands—

You almost yell at him.  The sound’s on the tip of your tongue when you bite down, stare trained wholly on the movie and the blood that splatters across the screen..

Really, you shouldn't be surprised.  You’ve known Jungkook for nearly two years - okay, not quite.  You’ve heard all the rumours about him, the whispered words that sound something like playboy and flirt and be careful.  You know and yet you’ve found yourself in this situation, desperately trying to figure out what the hell is going through his mind as you stare straight ahead, refusing to move a muscle.  

His profile is picture perfect from your periphery;  he's focused too, acting like he's done nothing wrong.  Sly as a fox, as always.

“Still blushing,”  he repeats conversationally, as if he’s commenting on the colour of the sky or how cold it is in your room.  Not as if he’s got a hand where it shouldn’t be, ink spilling over his skin in pretty patterns, burning the shape of it where he touches.

"I didn't blush.”  It’s a retort made for only argument’s sake and even then, without weight.  Feather soft and feeble in an attempt to keep your voice level.  It's hard when you’re burning up, a livewire settled where you feel him.  "I'm not blushing."

It's a lie - you can feel the flush, embarrassment flooding from your cheeks all the way down over your chest.  It’s an inferno beneath your skin, lava coursing through your veins.  

It spreads further and further, blooms somewhere new when his hand drifts lower, tracking across the soft inner of your thigh.  Doesn’t cease even when his hand does, palm firm over your leg, the ghost of a touch passing so close to your core you can’t help but jolt.  It’s as if he’s rearranged your pieces, mixed them all up.  A brush of his finger over your clothed entrance feels like it hits you right in the chest, snaps your heart to attention.  It roars to life, thundering madly, pulse erratic when he repeats the gesture, with that much more pressure.

You’re dripping, you realise to your horror, cotton of your thong sticking to your skin, grey of your shorts made darker by the arousal that spills over the one not-so-innocent digit. 

A part of you wants to run from the room.  Nearly do, heart hammering in your chest when Jungkook's face is suddenly too close, the warmth of his breath stifling against your neck.  It feels good, anticipation and desire fizzing in your stomach like fountain pop.  (The movie theatre kind, that’s somehow flat and too bubbly all at once.)

"Kook."  You mean to say it reproachfully, with a hand pushing his wrist away.  Instead it comes out like a whisper, a soft sigh of his name that sounds almost needy, laced with worry and anticipation that makes you want to tear your own hair out.  Fingers remain locked around bone, other hand digging into the blanket and the linen beneath it, searching desperately for some form of composure beneath the material.  

For the first time, you hazard a glance - know it’ll be bad for your own well-being - dropping your stare to where his hand rests.  (You have to admit - you like the sight of those tattoos, a stark contrast to the unblemished softness.)

Like it almost as much as his kisses, the first of which lands exactly where you want it most.  Delicate, polite, right on the junction of your jaw.  A sigh escapes before you can help it.  "Shy girl,”  he coos, teasing in a way that makes your heart skip a beat. 

“I’m not shy,”  you huff - try to, anyway, around the kaleidoscope of butterflies that are threatening to choke you.  "We're watching a movie."  You’re trying to redirect his attention, even as you’re desperate for it, even as you think you’d give your whole heart for it. 

You’re this close to combusting, eyes widening the moment he extracts his hand and tucks it back into the bowl of chips.  A part of you wants to yell at him - for starting this in the first place but mainly for leaving you high and dry, turned on and soaking through your underwear. 

(It’s not fair, but then again, you’d never expected them to be.  You’ve seen the rules Jungkook plays by - namely those of his own creation.  Term paper due the next morning?  He’d somehow pull it out of his ass that night.  Break something at a house party?  He’d be let off with a smile and a wave, those doe eyes of his utterly lethal when paired with his pout.)

“Watch the movie then.”  He sounds almost bored, utterly unbothered as he seamlessly slips back into the proper role of friend, classmate, study partner.

"Let's."  Without tossing another glance in his direction, you stare straight ahead, own hand delving for snacks.  So what if you very purposely brush your fingers against the pieces he's just touched, popping the pieces into your mouth before slotting your thumb against your tongue, cheeks hollowing around to suck the last bits of salt and butter off.

Despite your nerves - you’re hoping he's watching - you readjust, bringing knees up, crossing legs until one is resting atop his own thick thigh.  The full of your bottom lip disappears between your teeth, worried to within an inch of its life as you shift beside him, seemingly manoeuvring your shorts into their rightful position.

(You’re not.  They’re hitched higher than they were, barely worthy of the title of shorts, more akin to a belt.  So revealing it’s almost uncomfortable, wet of your arousal sticking them to your skin.)

(Two could play this game.)

(Maybe him better than you, but still.)

You know what you’re doing and yet you’re somehow surprised when he’s suddenly disappeared from your side and situated himself in front of you, eating up too much of the space on your small double bed.  “What’re you—“  The question disappears in the same moment he does, unable to track his movements when Jungkook slips forward, pressing his mouth over yours.

You’ve kissed a lot of people.  (Okay, not a lot, but enough.)  You were a senior in college, where kissing was like talking and fucking happened more often than dating.

You’ve never kissed Jungkook before.  

Why hadn’t you?

His lips are terribly soft, pink and pouted, slanting across yours as if he’s trying to devour you.  There’s no semblance of delicacy, nothing gentle and sweet like those brushes against your neck.  They’re forceful, demanding payment in full when his tongue glides over the seam, seeking entrance despite the fact that you think he might’ve slipped in anyway.

There’s not a single wall he couldn’t break down, not a lock he couldn’t pick.  Not with how he moves, purposeful and reassured, tongue sliding over yours, sucking it into his mouth as if it’s something he does every day.  (Which it very well could be - just not with you.)

“Shy girl,”  he repeats with a mouth filled with affection, praise that pours over you honey sweet and sticky.  “You don’t have to pretend with me.”

The thing is, you’re not pretending.  You’re half-afraid this entire moment is going to explode into a thousand pieces, a dream shattered by reality.  You hope it doesn’t.  Couldn’t bear it when he feels so nice, hand spanning your waist, tucked beneath the safety of your shirt and the fleece blanket between you.  

“I’m not.”  

“Oh?”  There’s something in his eyes, something that coils heat in the pit of your stomach.  You swear you can see the devil sitting on his shoulder, gleeful little smile rearranging his features.  “Do I make you nervous, ____?”

Did he?  Of course he did.  Had, even before you’d known him.

(You’d grown comfortable, though.  Found a way to separate the popular heartthrob from your friend.)

But you’ve lost your marbles, gone certifiably insane when you make a noise that sounds nothing like you.  Because you’re once again far too interested in the way Jungkook’s touching you, manhandling you as if you’re some sort of puppet.  It really shouldn’t turn you on so much, slick coating your bare thighs when he guides you onto your back, pushes you back against your too many pillows.

He’s your friend and he’s told you all about the way he fucks girls until they can’t walk.  

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want the same treatment, though. 

The moment Jungkook’s mouth finds your skin - sensitive and soft and so close to your soaked core - you keen, hands immediately flying into his silky head of hair.  It threads between your fingers like fine silk, filaments of gold overlaid in colour by the movie that still plays.  

“Oh my god,”  you gasp, entire body arching off the back of the bed in an effort to bring some form of  relief.  You can’t help the heat that burns your cheeks or how you sound, begging and pleading as you tug gently at his blond roots.  “Don’t tease me.”

You’re not asking very nicely but you figure Jungkook will give in.  It’s his fault, after all.  

His fault - which you don’t mind when he hooks fabric aside and drags his tongue across your slit, the flat of his tongue arching your back from the bed.  Can’t mind when he does it again, rounded nose bumping against your clit.  You’re trying to stay just a little bit decent, moans soft and caught between your teeth.  You’re practically biting a hole through your lip in an effort to stay quiet, hands curled into fists.  Gold spills between them and you imagine it hurts but he doesn’t stop, only works harder to drive you crazy.

Of course he’s good at this.  Too good, if you’re being honest.

You’re dripping, legs trembling in his firm, unyielding grip.  There's molten heat building in your stomach, creeping up your spine, and with each pass of his tongue over your sensitive core, it only expands.  You want more - need it - and almost beg when he catches your clit between his teeth.  A breathy baby spills out on accident when your eyes meet, gaze half-lidded.

It’s bad for your health, how good he looks right now, chin slick, lips rubied and pretty like jewels.  “Shy girl sounds so pretty.”

There's something about his praise that completely ruins you, the words dragging a delighted, sexpot moan off your tongue.  You want him to tell you how pretty you are now and later, over and over.  

You want to be his pretty girl. 

"I want you.  I need more,"  you whine, hips rutting desperately, slick messy across your thighs and shining across Jungkook's mouth.  He smiles then - brighter than the sun, utterly radiant, so devastatingly handsome you swear your brain short circuits - and then he’s doing exactly as you’ve asked. 

He eats you out like it’s an art form, flicking his tongue over your clit with practiced precision, sucking the pearl between his lips.  When he grazes his teeth over it - just the lightest pressure - you jolt, the feeling of a finger sliding into you stealing the breath from your lungs.

He’s always had nice hands, big broad palms and long fingers.  They reach places you could never hope to, stretching you deliciously when he sinks another in alongside the first, exploring you with ease.  The sting is slight, the fullness overriding any pain, further dulled by the suction of his mouth on your clit.  

He even hums when he finds the spot he’s been looking for, hooking his fingers against it and pressing.  (You swear you see stars;  you know you feel him smile, lips spread like butter over your skin when you sob.)

You can’t help yourself, writhing and moaning, trying to ride his face with a desperation that has your chest heaving.  It feels so good to have him between your legs.  You almost miss the appearance of his other hand - in view for but a moment before it disappears past the waistband of his sweats.  Dark as they are, pitch black like most of his clothing, it’s impossible to miss the way he touches himself.  It has you even needier, pussy clenching at the thought of him fisting his own hard cock.

“Do you want a hand?”  You ask as if you’re doing him a favour and not salivating at the prospect, eyes wide, blinking down at him from behind thick lashes.  

“Fuck.”  He’s sin incarnate, undeniable when he sheds his sweats, kicks them off with just one hand, other still slotted snug against your pussy.  He never ceases his movements, fucking you on his fingers even as he sits upright, leaned back on his calves.  “You want a taste?  Shy girl wants a big fat cock in her mouth?”  

There's something about hearing him so turned on, the expletive shooting a dizzying bolt of desire straight between yours legs.  You’ve seen Jungkook worked up - he was awfully competitive, after all, dominating most intramural sports, breaking PR records in the gym - but it's something else completely when he's making you drip cum all over his hand.

"Wow.”

Jungkook's cock is pretty, flushed and glossy from the pre-cum he spreads with his thumb, massaging over the tip like it owes him something.  

You want to taste it.

A contented hum rolls off your tongue at his question, though you don’t give him the satisfaction of an answer.  His ego's big enough without it and you’re much more interested in stroking something else.  Still, you lean into his palm, nuzzling your cheek against the warmth of it when he threads his hand through your hair, gathering it in his fist.

Then without looking away, your mouth falls open, tongue peeking past your lips to lick a fat stripe up the length of his cock, from base to tip.  It's hot and heavy on your tongue, the salty taste of his pre-cum better than candy.  You hum again, swirling your tongue around the head, and keep your gaze locked with Jungkook's, almost smirking when you drag your tongue over his fingers, gently grazing the edge of your teeth against the pad of his thumb. 

“Please.”  You’re usually far more reserved, not the kind to ask for more until you’re three months into dating and certain of where you stand.  You simply can’t help yourself now, the feeling of your own wetness painting your skin, making you clench around nothing.  "I need it."

The groan that comes sounds more like Christmas, a gift given by Santa Claus himself.  It filters into your ears and has you grinning up at him, not even bothering to hide the pride that flutters your lashes and has you pursing your lips around the head of his cock.  

When he speaks again, it’s dangerously quiet, low in his throat, laced with whatever same emotion that seems to shackle your limbs.  “Open up, ____,”  he instructs, though he offers little time to adjust, guiding his cock forward, stuffing your mouth full.  “Show me how bad.”

You don’t mind.  If you were to speak, it’d practically be a prayer, tongue tracing the veins that run the length.  A chorus of yes please more when he takes just as much as he gives.  You love the power that comes with Jungkook speaking so filthily, drunk on it when he continues, spewing filth in time with each rock of his hips.

Lips seal around the swollen head each time he withdraws, cheeks hollowing around the tip.  Tongue passes over his fingers again before your hand rises, fingers curling around his wrist to pull his own away.  (You probably shouldn't - it's too romantic - but thread your fingers through his in the same instant you sink down upon his cock, taking him halfway before pulling off with a pop!)

"Do you think you'll last long enough to fuck me?"  You’re pushing his buttons on purpose, just like he had yours during the movie. 

Something close to a snarl comes, a growl that reverberates out of that big cavernous chest of his, and he grips your hair tighter, tries to hold you still as he grins down at you.  The expression is so at odds with the warmth in his eyes, the boyish tilt of his head.

You repeat the motion again and again, taking him a little bit deeper until the head brushes the back of your throat, reflexively swallowing around the intrusion.  He's still so long and thick you haven’t even taken him all, drooling around his length, breathing through your nose and pushing past the desire to gag.  Then you relax your jaw just a little more, humming when your nose brushes the neatly groomed patch of hair at his base.

Your free hand slinks across his thigh, nails digging into the meat, delighted by the flex of muscle and sinew beneath your hand.  He's so hard, both on your tongue and beneath your touch.  It prompts you to shift forward just a bit more - you can feel the slick on your thighs, dripping down onto the sheets with each movement - and trace across his thigh to gently palm his balls.

If you could speak, you’d probably ask for more.  For Jungkook to use and abuse your throat as much as he wants.  As it stands, you can only moan around him, spit and his pre-cum smeared over your lips.

“Look at you.”  He’s talking to himself, lost in his own world as he fucks into your mouth, soothes the pad of his thumb over your cheek.  You adore the way he sounds now, dazed and a little messed up.  “Look so pretty with my cock in your mouth, ____.”

You can’t do much more than look up at him, batting your lashes when he compliments you, dragging your tongue everywhere you can reach as the head of his cock batters the back of your throat.  It's not an easy feat, drool all the way down your chin, trailing down your neck and staining the silk of your camisole.

At some point, you’ll need to pull off - get a proper breath of air - but not now.  Instead, you swallow around him, savouring the feeling of him filling your mouth, and squeeze gently at his balls.  When you wink up at him, it's half-hearted and with moisture in your eyes, lining lashes in the form of little gemstones.

You do it again and again, moaning lewdly around his cock before it gets too much, pulling off of him with a gasping breath and tears down your cheeks.  “Is it my turn yet?”  You’re only half-joking, made needier by the soreness in your throat, the same you want to feel so desperately between your legs.  Pressing a sweet, chaste peck to his head, tongue dipping into his slit to gather the pre-cum that leaks out, you offer the sweetest smile you can, saccharine sweet and soft.  

“Your turn?”  The way Jungkook snorts is derisive, playful.  It pulls straight off his tongue - which finds yours, swapping spit as he guides you back to the bed.  Teeth collide, lips grown swollen by the intensity of your kiss, and you startle when he nips hard at the bottom petal.  “I thought you were shy.”

“I am,”  you retort, returning the gesture, biting into the curve of his jaw with surprising repose.  Colour blooms beneath the edge of enamel, a smattering of colour that makes you smile, eager to leave more.

Which you would do, if Jungkook weren’t stripping before you, peeling his shirt from his front, tugging it over his head in that weirdly hot way that somehow all boys did.  It reveals skin in a single fluid pull, clothing discarded to the side before he levels you with a smile of his own, one that stirs to life the dimple in his cheek, eyes squinting with the intensity of his delight.  He looks deceptively sweet this way, nothing like the demon who’d just stuffed his cock down your throat.

You’re not sure which version of him you like best.

Seeing him now, dressed in nothing but that absurd, devilishly handsome grin of his, you’re not prepared.  You’re unsure where to look, gaze bouncing between the tattoos that crawl up his arms and span over his left pec, down the neatly defined ridges of his abs, and all the way back to his swollen, shiny cock.

“You’re drooling.”  Of course it’s something he’d say - because he always knows what to say, plucking perfect words from thin air.  The casual banter calms the rattle in your chest and refocuses it on his face that’s too close, looming over yours as his hands make quick work of your clothes, shedding the fabric from your form with deft, measured movements.

You’re ready to say something teasing - anything to distract from the fact that you’re still ogling him - when he catches you in another kiss, softer this time, infinitely sweeter.  Suddenly, you’re shy - which really makes no sense, given what’s transpired.

"Don't make fun of me,"  you mumble, as bashful as you were during the movie, embarrassment burning across your cheeks.  Arms rise to cover what little of your chest you can, folding around his broad palms that encompass them whole, tweaking at the straining buds.

“I’m not,”  Jungkook reassures against your lips, face dropping into the crook of your neck.  He nuzzles against you, sucking affection into the column of your throat, shamelessly laying a wreath of lust into the delicate skin.  You wonder whether he can hear the stutter of your pulse, the reaction his next words elicit.  “You’re pretty when you do it.”

You can’t quite pull your eyes away from his face, shrouded in lemon tart, so good-looking it’s unfair; his broad back and the muscle that threads it, undulating with each movement;  or the way his thighs flex between your spread knees.  You’re dragged through heaven and hell by the brush of his lips, each glide overstimulating your senses to the point of no return.  You’re still burning up, all the foreplay leaving your legs like jelly, cunt dripping with need.  "I bet you say that to all the girls."

Probably not the best thing to say with the position you’re in but the reality of the situation is hitting you and you’re feeling a little vulnerable.  Want an answer that’ll soften the sharp edges of his teeth, the intoxicating glint in his stare.

“No, just you.”  Whether it’s true or not, you can’t say for certain.  You hope it is - wish upon a star for it, laying all your hopes and dreams into the constellations in his eyes.  They’re lovely, winking down at you from the darkest depths, guiding you home.  

You don’t mean to scoff - really, you don’t.  It comes of its own accord, spilling forth like a glass too full.

“You don’t believe me?”  He sounds almost offended, the picture of innocence when he reaches down, hand scrambling about for pooled black fabric.  Comes back up with a packet between his index and middle finger, held aloft like a prize.  

How can you when he’s ready to devour you whole, primed to feast as he rolls the condom over his length, stroking himself once, twice, gaze never wavering from where it rests between your legs.

“Always prepared.”  It’s scathing but somehow tender, too mesmerised by the way he fucks into his loose fist.  You’d say more - maybe make a flippant comment about his reputation - but can’t find the words when he’s teasing you, swollen head tapping teasingly over your core.  It feels like too much, leaves you breathless when he hikes your legs up and nearly folds you in half. 

When he presses into you, the sound you make is sinful, a moan you can’t help.  Jungkook’s so fucking big you’re sure you’re about to split in half, pussy clenching tight around the sudden intrusion.  “Oh my god,”  you whine, hands coiling into his hair, trying desperately to relax, the sting of the stretch battling the pressure that builds as he sinks further in.  “You’re so big.  I c-can’t—”  You’re starting to babble nonsense and he hasn’t even begun moving yet, lips hot over the sweat-slick column of his throat when he bows, burning his presence into the grace of your neck.  A hickey of your own creation blooms right where your mouth is, right over his shoulder.  The salt of his skin distracts you, makes it easier to accommodate the fullness.  “You feel so good, Kook.”  You rock experimentally beneath him, clenching tight as if to draw him deeper.  “Please, move,”  you beg, aiming to form another bruise beneath his skin.

The first thrust chases all the breath from your lungs, a gasp ricocheting off your tongue and into the minimal space between you.  He's absurdly big, stretching you out so well that every stroke feels like heaven.  When he pushes back in, snaps his hips in that easy, effortless motion of his, you’re making the most obscene noises, words lost to his hair as he lavishes your tits with attention.

B-big! is all you manage to squeak out.  It sounds like that, anyway.  With how he's filling you, it's hard to speak coherently;  you can practically feel him in your throat.  (Or maybe that's just from choking on him earlier.  You’re not really sure.)

Hands find their way around his neck, over his shoulders, periwinkle-painted nails leaving light etchings in their wake.  They bloom colour over his back - not too hard, careful still, motor skills barely functioning - before you tangle your fingers in his hair, holding him recklessly close as the pressure builds and builds, flooding your abdomen in heat. 

There’s slick all across your thighs.  You can hear the wet sounds each time Jungkook slips almost all the way out and then rocks back in.  It's terribly messy and so hot but you’re greedy, drunk off the feeling of having this Adonis break you in half.  "Harder, p-please."  Eyes wide, you tug gently at the soft strands at the nape of his neck, meeting his with a flutter of your lashes.  "Please?"

He acquiesces without hesitation, fucks you harder, deeper, like an animal in a rut.  Grinds against you with each thrust, pushing you to your limits.  Even has the audacity to push further, until the strain in your hips conflicts with the pleasure skipping up your spine, melting you into a boneless mass.

You’ve never felt like this, stretched out and used.  You’re used to gentle lovers, sweet - if not boring - lovemaking.  The way Jungkook's pounding into you is unheard of and you’re loving it, his name whimpered on a feedback loop.  A steady Kook, Kook, Kook that twinkles in your ears, inarticulate and pleading as you rock shamelessly against him.

“You like that, ____?”  It’s a question for his own ego, something he knows but asks anyway.  (It’d be impossible not to know the answer when your cunt’s sucking him in, coating his cock in a pretty sheen.)

You’re nodding dumbly, breathless, eager to meet him each time he snaps forward.  (It’s not easy like this, practically prone beneath him, twisted into a pretzel.)  "Like it so m-much.  Feels so good.”  You can’t stop smoothing open mouthed kisses over his fluffy hair, basking in the sunshine that radiates off him. 

There's an ache starting between your legs, pussy swollen around his thick length.  You’re grateful for your natural flexibility, the hot yoga sessions you’d entertained on-and-off for years.  You’re sure you’d feel it in your legs too, knees pushed all the way up by your ears, if not for that.  

But still, you’re defenceless, made to experience each and every thing he has to offer:  every vein and ridge, the head of his cock reaching so deep it's almost too much.  With each stroke, Jungkook’s brushing against the sensitive spot that has pleasure skyrocketing, blossoming like a rose garden in spring.  "R-right there,"  you manage, rolling your hips purposefully, nearly crying each time he brushes against your g-spot.

“Right there?”  He parrots it back, infuriating and adorable, the teasing tenor dripping over you like raindrops.  They settle beneath your skin, sinking into your bones as he rears back just enough, enough to steal a kiss that’s far more tongue than it needs to be.  

It’s almost as if he’s trying to drown you, sink you beneath high tide.  

Spit descends down your chin, trails over your neck and it’s a little gross but you don’t care.  The attention he’s giving is shameless, passed over your cheeks, your throat, your breasts.  He gives and gives, both with his lips and the praise that comes unfettered.  “Perfect,”  he hums, sucking your nipple into his mouth, worrying the bud until it’s straining and puffy, too sensitive when he kisses you again and your own thigh brushes against it.  You whimper at the feeling, pulling softly at his hair, unsure whether you want less or need more.  “So sensitive.  Such a shy girl.  Such a pretty girl.”

Every word of praise has you beaming, nearly purring with delight despite the pain that comes when he puts you through the same once more, laving over the other bud with abandon.  He's sweat-slick, beads of it running down his neck, over the mosaic of bruises you’ve left behind.  It's almost embarrassing how dark his throat is coloured, a dozen reminders left all over his skin.

(You wonder how long they’ll last, how many days will pass as the colour shifts, changing like autumn leaves.  Whether they’ll still be there at your next lecture, if he’ll wear them with pride or cover up beneath one of his big baggy sweaters.)

(You hope it’s the latter.)

(Maybe he’ll let you give him more.)

(Maybe he—)

There’s a change of pace and you’re crying out, hiccupping with each thrust, the head of his cock finding your g-spot with unbearable, unrelenting precision.  Clawing at his arms, long nails digging into the firm muscle of his biceps, something between a sob and a plea rolls off your tongue, over and over.  "So big.  It's too m-much.”  And yet you don’t want him to stop, punch drunk from the way he reaches deep and pulls you tighter against him, hips risen off the bed. 

You’re begging again, eyes rolled so far back in your head you can hardly focus, the coil in your stomach pulled so tight you know it's about to snap.  When Jungkook laughs - a sweet giggle that proves his duality - you clench almost painfully, tears finally spilling over. 

One last brush against your most sensitive spot, one last thrust of that monster cock, and you’re peaking, coming so intensely you feel as if you’re soaring. Everything's suddenly so much more wet, release soaking into the linens beneath you, coating your thighs and his legs and dripping between you.

You’ve never come like this before, without some sort of direct stimulation on your clit.  It’s pleasurable in a different way, severing all your sensibilities, explosive in its magnitude.  It tingles beneath your skin, flooding all your senses. 

"Kook—please—come for me.”  You’re rocking up, forward - trying to, at least, folded as you are - singing his name, pleading for him to fuck his cum into you (momentarily ignorant to the fact that you’ve been responsible, a thin wall of latex separating you from your fucked out fantasy).  

Despite the sensitivity, you’re clenching around him, eager to bring him to his own high.  You want to feel him come apart above you, eroded into a mess like you are.

He’s just as pretty reaching his peak as he is at any other time, handsome face screwed up as if he’s reached nirvana, bliss slacking his features the longer he rides it out, bucking into you as he fills the condom and still doesn’t stop.  It’s almost unbearable, oversensitivity spilling into pleasure until he leisurely grinds to a halt, stops the inconsistent pressure against your bundle of nerves, the assault on your fluttering walls.

When he collapses against you, whole face squished between the valley of your breasts, you can’t help but laugh, the sound breathless and endeared.  “Are you okay?”  You don’t mind where he is, weight comforting, skin sticky on yours.  He’s unbelievably warm - a blanket fresh from the wash and yet so much better, lulling you into a sense of security.

“Better than okay,”  he murmurs against your chest, smothering open-mouthed kisses over skin, snickering when you jolt at the feel of his teeth over your nipple one last time.  “You’re welcome.”  It’s an indulgent, facetious expression of gratitude, one that you haven’t asked for.  You laugh all the same, ducking your head into the crown of spun gold atop his head.  

“You too.”

tag list.  @neverthefirstchoice @youwannabelostandnotbefound @codeinebelle​

[atruththatyoudeny]

Happy 28th! Thank you to all fandom authors who make my days brighter with their works ♥ Here are all the wonderful fics I read this month:

love is a word, you gave it a name | CuckooTrooke | age difference - famous/not famous - slow burn - starngers to friends to lovers - mutual pining - anxiety disorder - internalized homophobia - implied/referenced homophbia - closet - panic attacks - angst - hurt/comfort - gender dysphoria - gender euphoria - daddy kink - feminiziation - 158k After two decades in brutal show business, Louis Tomlinson is trying to restore his tranquility of mind in the peace of Northern Europe where the sun barely sets, Maria's bar is always open, and young Harry has an irresistible spark in his eyes.

You Only Fall In Love Twice | Beanno28 | polyamory - Zourry - famous/not famous - body insecurities - recreational drug use - threesome - lingerie - 57k Louis meets popstar Harry Styles while he is working at a festival and they hit it off right away. When he is introduced to Harry’s boyfriend, Zayn, Louis is invited to learn about their world of Polyamory. Will he decide it’s not for him or will he embrace the new lifestyle? This could be the start of something new…

Mind of Stone | amomentoflove | greek mythology - inspired by Medusa - Percy Jackson references - half-bloods - Styles triplets - magic - slow burn - kidnapping - curses - 42k Louis gingerly moves around the statues, trying not to look at their faces. The room is quiet, probably a basement from the low ceiling. He mentally curses when he doesn’t see a door leading outside. He checks his phone and gawks that it’s no longer early into Saturday night, but well into Sunday morning. He’s lost almost twelve hours, and he really doesn’t know how that’s possible. He needs to find a way back home, and then figure out what the fuck happened at the bar tonight.

All Out of Love | SunTomato | Cupid - falling in love - developing friendships - financial issues - angst - no smut - 33k Harry is a Cupid, who work their magic on a different plane, invisible to humans. Harry is good at love. Harry loves love. Unfortunately, Harry can be a bit clumsy, and sometimes he gets a little distracted. While on a mission to match Liam and Zayn, the distraction comes in the shape of Louis Tomlinson – an overworked and underloved man trying way too hard to do everything himself. Everywhere Harry turns, he sees Louis. That wouldn’t really be a problem except that Harry’s fairly sure Louis sees him, too.

something brand new you've never seen | LiveLaughLoveLarry | psychic abilities - visions - flirting - first dates - falling in love - 7k Louis has an unusual ability: the ability to find what someone is Seeking -- or at least, the ability to draw it. He has a small business as Laurence de la Cherche, Psychic Seeker, where he helps people to find what they're looking for -- lost items, pets, even people. And then one day, in walks a man Louis didn't realize he'd been looking for all his life.

So familiar a gleam | softfonds | fantasy - fairy tale - royalty - Beauty and the Beast elements - Sleeping Beauty elements - fluff - mild angst - 19k Harry has spent all his life moving from village to village with his aunts, never really feeling like he belonged in one place. But when he ends up stuck in an enchanted castle with a mysterious owner, he doesn't expect to find out secrets of his own past and just what home means.

The Lost Art of Breeding and (Mis)Behaviour | indiaalphawhiskey | PWP - Captive Prince inspired - BDSM - master/slave - breeding kink - breeding slave - bondage - virginity kink - light humiliation - edging - teasing - light manipulation - rough sex - 13k “Strip, slave.” His voice was rough – stern, as a proper Master’s voice should be. Harry couldn’t help but feel pleased. “I could have had five of your kind for your price. Best make sure I’ve not been cheated.” -- Or, Harry learns a thing or two about fate and faith.

Late Night Talking | germericangirl | PWP- phone sex - established relationship - canon compliant - 2k Louis breaks his elbow, Harry is upset he can’t be there to take care of him. All he can do is take care of him through the phone, the best he can…

The light is coming | ishiplouis | a/b/o - mpreg - feral behaviour - scenting - nesting - hurt/comfort - fluff - angst - 10k Louis was cold. So fucking cold. He was hungry too. He hadn’t eaten a real meal in a long time. He’d lost count of how many days he hadn’t eaten correctly or, rather, he didn’t want to remember. He wanted to forget. Forget that he was now alone. Well, mostly. He cursed his faith. He wasn’t supposed to end up like this. He was supposed to go to college, find a mate, and graduate with honours. Maybe he would have to apply right after graduation to some job offers but thankfully his father would intervene and would find him a job in no time at one of his friends’ companies. Then he would get married and be finally mated by his Alpha. In this dream of his, Louis would end up with three beautiful pups, a huge house with a white fence and a wonderful mate always caring for him until his last breath. That was how it was supposed to happen. Louis put a hand on his slowly hardening belly, a single tear rolling down his cheek. It wasn’t fair. Or the one where Louis is lost but Harry is there to save him.

Like How I Pictured It | parmahamlarrie | blind character - childhood friends to lovers - hurt/comfort - majoc character injury - 17k Louis Tomlinson hasn’t always been blind. As a child, his vision was impaired, but he had hopes that there would be years before he lost his sight completely. Before the darkness, he had a normal childhood running around alongside his best friend, Harry Styles. When Harry moved away as a teenager, Louis was lost in more ways than one. What will happen when a chance encounter brings the two together again? What will happen when he finally asks for his something great?

butterflies, the beautiful kind | softloubabie | a/b/o - fluff - smut - 18k Louis is a single parent with a child who is terrified of doctors. However, one day, the kid gets sick. Thankfully the new pediatrician, doctor Styles, has wild curly hair and green eyes and a soothing deep voice that the kid immediately grows attached to.

I Still Crave It | germericangirl | a/b/o - strangers to lovers - scent marking - fluff - smut - mpreg - 16k “Are you okay?” He asked concerned. Louis glanced at him “Everything hurts, is all.” He explained. Harry nodded and cleared his throat before speaking up “You know, there might be a way to make you feel better, help you recover faster.” The alpha cleared his throat again as he glanced anywhere but at Louis. Louis looked at him with narrowed eyes “Are you suggesting to scent me?” he asked incredulously. Harry shrugged “It’s been proven to help. There are studies.” He said quietly. And usually Louis would protest, would tell the alpha to fuck off, to get the hell out of his flat. That he wasn’t some weak omega who needed some alpha’s help. But as it was, he was tired and exhausted and in pain. Being scented actually sounded kind of nice right now. “Fine but don’t make it weird.” Louis said as he turned on his right side, silently asking Harry to lie behind him. . Or: Louis is an independent omega, who doesn't need or want an alpha. When he becomes ill and meets alpha Harry, he agrees to let him take care of him and quickly gets addicted to his scent. Once he feels better though, he keeps making up lies so that the alpha continues scenting him.

Among Lavender Fields | homosociallyyours | 1980s - girl direction - first love - famous/not famous - internalized homophobia - slow burn - angst - fluff - miscommunication - 70k At twenty-one, Louis Tomlinson is more than ready to shed the girl next door image that's been with her since her entry into film in her childhood, but with a mother and father steeped in Hollywood tradition it's felt impossible. Meanwhile, Harry Styles is a young, struggling musician new to London, friendless yet eager for the next phase of her life to begin. When French director Marie Coutard casts the two of them in her film, it's a chance for both to break away from the people they've been. Together, they struggle through an acting process that's new and unfamiliar for both of them, learning more than they could've imagined about themselves along the way. As they spend long days picking lavender and long nights sharing the things they've never been able to tell anyone else, their love blooms. Will the flower fade, or will the love they make among lavender fields be one they carry with them to the end?

[weasleylangs]

dirty little secret / g.w

‘i go around a time or two, just to waste my time with you’ 

Summary: Being friends with benefits was a mutual decision, a way to relieve stress when needed after a stressful twelve months. It was decided it was just between them, not to be anybodies business but George and Y/N’s, but she doesn’t want to be his dirty little secret anymore. Pairing: George Weasley x Fem!Reader Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI !! no graphic depictions of sex but there’s one really fucking steamy kiss and sex & fwb situations/hookup culture is discussed heavily, sweet aftercare for both reader and George, jealousy & possession (nothing toxic), alcohol / drinking, food.  Word Count: 5.6k AUTHORS NOTE / aaaaa the first instalment for my pop punk series!!! this one is based off dirty little secret by the all american rejects! im going to kiss @weelittleweasley for helping me write the steamy kiss btw!!!!!

POP PUNK COLLECTION 

(all 18+) taglist / @spacexcowgirl @weelittleweasley​ @lumos-barnes​ @butterflybuchanan​ @levylovegood​ @omghufflepuff​ @mitsukui​ 

----------

Y/N hears George when he reenters her room, a glass of water in one of his hands, a washcloth in the other. Her legs still feel slightly numb from the pleasure she had just been on the receiving end of, a blissed-out expression on her face as she makes grabby hands towards the man in her doorway. 

George smiles dopily down at her, helping her sit up before handing her the glass of water. “How are you feeling?” he asks, checking in as he starts to help clean Y/N up. He quickly stops when she winces, scared he hurt her. “Fuck, sorry,” he whispers, pulling his hand away but when she laughs and grabs his hand, he relaxes.

“It’s fine,” she smiles, the look of euphoria still gracing her facial features. “Just a little sensitive,” she says honestly. George nods slightly, a proud smile on his lips as he goes back to cleaning her skin, taking extra care in areas where Y/N would be sensitive. 

He’s always like this after sex, making sure she’s okay. It’s a part of the reason why Y/N agreed on being friends with benefits with him in the first place, he’s the most trustworthy person she knows. 

It all started when they were twenty-one; the war had finished, their loved ones were safe and they so desperately needed to unwind in a very specific way after the stress of the previous twelve months. It was a mistake at first, two best friends drunkenly joking about sleeping together and the next thing they knew, they were rolling in the sheets together. Y/N was positive she ruined her longest friendship, but when George began his own personal ritual of aftercare, she knew she couldn’t let him go easily. 

This is why when the preposition of friends with benefits was put on the table by George, she immediately took it; six months later they’re still sleeping together, and even though her feelings for George are evergrowing, she’s happy with their current situation. 

“You sure you’re okay?” George presses when he’s noticed Y/N’s eyes glazed over. He’s worried he went a little harder than usual tonight. The stress of getting the joke shop back up and running has been getting to him and he needed a release of pressure in more ways than one.  

“Yes, I’m sure,” she says, taking George’s hand in her own before pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles that causes a soft red hue to develop across his freckled cheeks. That’s something else she’s learnt about George since she began sleeping with him; he needs aftercare for himself just as much herself, and he mostly needs it in some form of physical affection. “Just thinking, nothing bad. I promise.” 

George nods asking if Y/N’s good to be picked up. She giggles when she realises he’s taking her to the bathroom so she can pee. He sits her down on the toilet before turning around and gasping as he sees his reflection in the mirror. “Fuck woman,” he exclaims, before twisting his body so he can see the scratches that start at his shoulders and trail down his back. “Were you trying to rip me apart?” 

He hears a giggle come from behind him, quickly followed by a toilet flushing. He feels her frame push past him so she can wash her hands and when she reaches to grab some cream to put on George’s back she lets out her own gasp.

“George Fabian Weasley, what the fuck?” Her neck has a hickey, and not just a small one. She’s beginning to question whether George is part vampire when she looks up at him and he’s smirking at her, a mischievous glint in his eye. “It’s Spring! I have lunch with Angie tomorrow! I can’t cover these!”

George almost feels bad, but his admiration for his work on her neck is slightly winning over his guilt. “I’m sorry, darling,” it’s genuine and they both know it when Y/N’s scowl falters slightly, threatening to smile.

“No, you’re not,” she says, grabbing the cream for his back and pushing him back into her bedroom. Before she begins to help George, she stands in front of her drawers, grabbing clothes to put on now she’s come out of her post-sex haze. She hears the redhead behind her chuckle when he recognises the sweater she puts on as his own as he puts his own boxers back on. “But I guess it’s payback. Your back’s going to hurt tomorrow and Fred’s going to wonder why.”

None of their friends are aware of... their arrangement. They agreed, knowing they would make it weird. After all, Fred’s engaged to his long term girlfriend from their Hogwarts years and their other friends have all started putting themselves out there, so it’s safe to say, they’re the last two to start to settle down. 

But they like their current relationship; it’s carefree, it’s simple, it’s not complicated like a proper relationship and if they’re honest, they get some mindblowing sex out of it. So it’s not anybody’s business but each other’s. 

After a while, Y/N’s finished putting the cream on George’s back. She spent the time mumbling apologies whenever George winces, she didn’t realise how hard she was going so she makes a mental note to not rip apart his back the next time they see each other. She presses a gentle kiss to the base of George’s neck, something she doesn’t think too much about but it feels like it’s blurring the lines between romantic and platonic right now and she feels herself panic a tiny bit.

“Do you work tomorrow?” She asks George, who hums in agreement. His eyes are droopy like he’s almost falling asleep and Y/N expected this. He’s putty in anybody’s hands the second you start trailing your hands gently up any part of his body, specifically his back. “Are you sleeping here tonight?” she giggles as she asks and George sighs. 

“I probably shouldn't but-” he cuts himself off with a yawn before rolling over onto his back. “Your bed is just so much more comfortable than mine.” 

Y/N rolls her eyes, pushing him slightly before jumping off the bed and leaving George to frown at her when she moves from her spot next to him. She grabs her wand from her bedside table, walking through her flat to make sure all her lights are turned off before enchanting ‘lumos’ so she can light her way back to her bedroom. 

“You’re letting me stay?” She nods at his words, crawling into bed with him. While she knows George is a sucker for physical affection, Y/N is also well aware he hates sleeping cuddled up to people so she gives him his space in the bed. Because of this, she doesn’t expect George to shift his body so even though they’re not cuddling, they’re still close, a simple form of comfort that neither of them can decipher as platonic or romantic.

“Yes, you can stay,” she says, rubbing her thumb along George’s hand as a way of saying goodnight, “but you wake me up before 9am tomorrow and you die.” 

-----

When Y/N wakes up the next morning to her alarm going off, the side of the bed is empty and cold. Her alarm clock reads 10:30am, so she knows George has been gone for a few hours at this point. She feels a small sense of sadness, remembering how fun the mornings are the times George sleeps over and stays until she wakes up. 

She sighs, deciding there’s no point in dwelling on George’s absence. When she walks into her kitchen, she checks her kettle; cursing George when she finds it empty because she knows he just had to have a cup of tea before leaving this morning and rolls her eyes as she fills it herself. Her kettle’s boiling as she potters around when she spots a piece of paper with George’s writing all over it. 

‘George’s excuses for the hickeys’ the note reads in his messy scrawl, and Y/N has to stifle a cackle before she continues to read. ‘1. ran into a door’ is scratched out immediately and she knows George probably thought it was a good idea at first before realising the hickeys are on her neck, so the running into the door isn't feasible. ‘2. bug’ is the next one and she has to stop herself from rolling her eyes and when she goes back to George’s oh so incredible list, her breath hitches. 

‘3. be honest and say you hooked up with someone’ makes Y/N’s heart sink. She hasn’t slept with anyone besides George in the past six months, hasn’t wanted to either for that matter, but it makes her realise something. 

She doesn’t know if George is the same. 

She’s well aware of their situation and the lack of commitment outside of promising to come over later, but her emotions hit her harder than she thought they would. While she wouldn’t complain if she and George became something more, she knows it’s not what either of them is looking for at the moment, so she doesn’t understand why she’s so hurt. Does George think I shag other people? she thinks before the kettle starts to hiss to indicate the water is boiled and she’s brought back to reality. 

After drinking her tea, Y/N begins to get ready, trying her best to cover the purple bruises littering her neck and trying to keep herself under control while she admires them in the mirror. Soon enough, she’s out the door and making her way to Diagon Alley where she spots Angie, talking with Fred.

“Y/N!” Fred exclaims as she gets closer and waves frantically as she walks towards them. “We’re just talking about how we think George has a bird!” Y/N chokes on air, her brows furrowing at Fred’s words. They’ve been so careful, a bit too careful when it comes to hiding their relationship from their friends so she doesn’t understand.

“Why do you think that?” Her tone is casual, trying to act natural as she tries to find out what signs could point to their... activities being exposed, and to his brother of all people.

Fred starts laughing again, holding his stomach as he tries to tell the story. “He didn’t come home last night- I only noticed because I was up at 3 and his bedroom door was open which was weird because he didn’t tell me he was going out!” Fred’s animated when he’s talking, taking a sip of his drink and using his free hand to emphasise his story. “And when he was reaching for something in a closet today he winced, like his back hurt!” 

Y/N stares at Fred blankly, memories of the night before flooding her memory when Fred mentions George wincing. She knows now is not the time to start thinking about how good George made her feel last night. “What does wincing have to do with anything?” 

She knows she made a mistake when Fred’s eyes widen, staring at her. “Well, my dear prude Y/N, my back only hurts when it’s scratched up from a good fu-” 

“Okay, we do not need to hear about your sex life,” Angie says, grabbing Y/N by the shoulders and steering her off. “We have a lunch date that you’re not invited to.” She’s smiling when she says it and when Fred bids the two girls goodbye, Angie calls out something about making fun of George for her. 

She’s quiet on the walk to the cafe she and Angelina have planned for lunch, lost in thoughts. She’s stuck on the idea of George sleeping with other people even though she knows she was the one with George last night, that she was the one scratching up his back. They walk in tandem, Angelina raving about Quidditch while Y/N nodded in acknowledgement at appropriate times. 

Eventually, they reach the cafe, quickly taking a seat and looking at the menu. It’s then when Angelina’s hand pulls the menu down from Y/N’s face and she’s giving the girl a questioning look.

“What’s wrong?” She asks.

Y/N stares at her, not understanding how she did anything to convey any feeling at all, let alone a feeling of something being wrong. She’s about to deny it when she looks Angelina in the eye, and she realises she can’t lie to her because she’d be questioned for the rest of lunch. “Do you think George has a friend with benefits?”

Angelina giggles at Y/N’s words, smiling slightly. “I know you’re sleeping with him.” She says it so casually that Y/N doesn’t even process what she said for a few beats. She half expected her friend to admit she was also sleeping with George, after all, she used to suspect they had a thing when they were teenagers but this is the last thing she expected. 

She’s so baffled she can’t even deny it, no words leaving her mouth for a second before she just stares at Angelina, “How?”

Angelina keeps smiling, quickly ordering their drinks when the waitress comes over and requests a little longer to decide on food before turning back to her friend sitting dumbfounded across the table. “Fred might be stupid and oblivious, but I’m not. I see the way he looks at you.” 

Y/N doesn’t think George looks at her in any particular way, at least he doesn’t when she isn’t under him and she notices Angelina’s eyes soften when Y/N doesn’t say anything. “You didn’t know before sleeping with him?”

“Didn’t know what before sleeping with him?”

“That he likes you?” Y/N thinks Angelina’s being stupid; it’s always been her liking George and George not noticing, not the other way around. George has always been sweet and gentle in bed, way nicer and way more giving than any other romantic partner in her past, but she’s always chalked it up to him just being George. That’s how she’s always known him, how she knew him when they met at 11, how she knew him on the Quidditch pitch when they were 15 and how she knows him now, at 22 and in his bed. 

“He doesn’t like me, you’re just making stuff up!” She’s adamant Angelina’s just messing with her but Angelina just sighs, obviously ready to move on from the topic. “He doesn’t,” she whispers to no one in particular and she feels Angelina grab her hand, rubbing a thumb across the top in a comforting kind of way.

“I guess it’s not my place to say,” she starts, “but I’ve never seen George treat someone else like the way he treats you. It’s like... It’s like you’re glass, that he’s scared of breaking you and you have to be in his sights at all times.” It’s soft and Y/N knows it’s genuine as much as she hates to admit it. 

The conversation changes, thankfully putting Y/N and George out of the hot seat but she’s hanging onto every word of Angelina’s, suddenly overthinking every interaction she’s had with the redhead in the past few months. Panic starts to set in and it only gets worse when Angelina bids her goodbye.

Her thoughts are loud; does she like George or does she like the way George makes her feel? What if George has liked her this entire time and she’s mistaken her feelings for romantic when they’re purely physical? 

As she wonders, she realises she’s being stupid. Y/N knows she likes George, she’s liked George for so long and she likes him so much it hurts. That’s when a new thought arrives, a more sinister thought, a meaner thought; What if Angelina is just completely wrong, that’s always a possibility. What if George doesn’t like her back at all. 

-----

She wanders Diagon Alley, making her way to the Apothecary after remembering she needs some more Valerian sprigs to make a new batch of the Potion for Dreamless Sleep. She’s muttering to herself as she wanders the store, thinking about how these days her best night's sleep are spent besides George but the thought is quickly pushed away when she spots her ingredient of choice and she can barely reach it. 

“Fuck,” she mutters, looking around for a stool or a shop assistant so she can finally get out of Diagon Alley. She’s about to give up and leave herself when she’s met with a tough body slamming into her own. Apologies spill from her mouth quickly, feeling terrible she almost knocked this poor guy over in the middle of the Apothecary but when she looks up, George is looking down at her.

“What do you need, darling?” The nickname makes her heart race and she only hopes George can’t hear it seconds away from beating from her chest. She doesn’t respond immediately, preoccupied with how nice he looks and it’s not until he waves in front of her face that she responds.

“Sorry,” she says, shaking her head in a way to push away her thoughts, “was looking for some Valerian sprigs.” She hopes George minds his own business, memories from her meeting with Angelina flooding her thoughts. She starts to over analyse the way George looks at her, whether it’s as if she’s glass, like Angelina claims but when she looks at George, he’s reaching up and grabbing the jar for her.

“Treacle fudge?” He questions, and it takes her a moment to process he’s asking why she needs the ingredient. 

“Dreamless Sleep,” she replies, embarrassed. She’s never needed a sleeping potion when George is around, his presence alone is enough to fight off any unwanted nightmares but that’s the last thing he needs to know. Thankfully, he doesn’t comment, just puts the jar back up on the shelf when she’s done and motions for her to follow him around the store. 

He stops in front of the rose thorns, silently debating how many to get when he feels Y/N’s eyes on him. “Love potion, for WonderWitch,” he says, grabbing some and putting them in a bag before making his way to the counter. He grabs the Valerian sprigs from Y/N’s hand, placing them alongside his rose thorns and ignoring her protests when he hands some Galleons to the shopkeeper. 

“I get a discount,” he says when they exit the shop, “plus, I didn’t mind.” Y/N stares at him, not able to read a single emotion on his face. She thanks him and takes the Valerian sprigs from him and places them in her bag. 

“Do you wanna come over tonight?” He asks, rubbing the back of his neck. “Fred won’t be home.” His cheeks are flushed red, almost like he’s shy asking to see her for the second night in a row. The word ‘yes’ is on the tip of her tongue, threatening to spill out without her permission. She badly wants to let the word slip as well, but her thoughts from earlier come to the forefront once again and at this moment, Y/N can’t seem to convince herself that George wants her in the same way she wants him.

“No, sorry,” she says bluntly, and she doesn’t miss the look of shock on his face. Y/N has never turned George down and while he respects her no, it confuses him nonetheless. “Just... Not feeling well. You know?”

Y/N knows George doesn’t believe her, she sees it in his eyes, but he hums in acknowledgement before lifting his wrist and checking his watch. “Look, I’ve gotta go, Fred’s going to kill me,” the words are forced like he wants to stay and make sure everything is okay between the pair and he’s being pulled away too soon. “I’ll see you sometime this week, yeah?”

“Yeah, maybe,” Y/N says, knowing he doesn’t mean sometime this week in his bed, but the thought happens before she can stop it and it’s right now she realises she needs to push George away before she gets more hurt. 

-----

It’s been a week since Y/N turned down George’s offer to come over that night, and she has a feeling he’s avoiding her. Usually, when Y/N denies him it only takes him a few days before he comes crawling back or vice versa; they’ve never been able to go long without falling into bed together, the co-dependency on each other for a hook up was one they never discussed, but was known, so the fact George didn’t end up in her bed during the week makes her painfully aware something is wrong and even though she knows it’s her own fault, it doesn’t make it hurt any less.  

The suspicion is only confirmed when she’s dragged to a bar in Muggle London on the following Saturday night. Angie, Katie and Alicia’s complaints that Y/N’s been too high strung this week getting to her and their peer pressure eventually worked. She doesn’t mind the bar- it’s not too busy but it’s still got enough people in it for a good time and Katie and Lee are getting everyone drinks when Y/N spots a head of bright, auburn hair across the room. 

She doesn’t even think twice before knowing it’s George, and it’s got nothing to do with the girl next to him, hanging off every word he’s saying not being Fred’s fiancée. The way she feels in her entire body when she spots him, the ache in her heart she feels is what confirms it’s George. He’s the only person to ever have this kind of power over her and at this moment, she wishes he didn’t. 

Because George is flirting with the girl next to him and she’s batting her eyelashes, clearly happy with the attention the cute redhead is giving her and Y/N wants nothing more than to be in her place and it hurts, even more, knowing she usually is in her place. George is a lot more comfortable talking sex once he has a few glasses of whiskey, so the flirting gets turned up to an eleven and all their friends laugh at his forwardness. 

Angelina sees Y/N staring longingly at the younger twin and without words she knows something is wrong. So she grabs the tequila from Katie and places it in front of Y/N. “Drink it.” She looks at Angelina, confused why her attention was stolen from George but smiles happily when the shot glass is in her hand. 

It burns as it slides down her throat, after all, tequila always does. She quickly takes the lemon from whoever’s holding it out to her, pulling a face as the sourness meets her taste buds. Angelina, Katie and Alicia and hollering when she looks back at them, her friends successfully stealing her attention from George as they drag her to the dancefloor. ABBA is playing over the loudspeaker, and the girls yell in excitement, they would never pass up the opportunity to dance to ABBA; memories of post-Quidditch parties and sneaking Firewhiskey into the Gryffindor Common Room coming to the forefront of their minds. 

They dance for who knows how long with Lee joining them as he dances between Alicia and Katie, playing up the ladies’ man role. It makes Y/N laugh, Lee clearly loving the attention from the girls but it’s at that moment she spots George and the girl from earlier, dancing; George’s hands are on her hips, respectful but holding her close and it fills Y/N with a feeling so horrible, she has to turn around to push the vile, green monster back down. 

Thankfully, or not so thankfully, she’s not entirely sure just yet, she turns to face a guy. He’s cute, got a puppy dog look about him and he smiles at Y/N in a way that indicates he’s asking to dance. She says yes, of course, and her hands wrap around his neck. She hates that she’s spending this time dancing with him comparing him to George; his hands aren’t as calloused, he smells like mint as opposed to the familiar scent of cinnamon and Earl Grey tea, her heart isn't racing like it would if she was with the redhead. 

George sees her across the dance floor because his eyes haven’t left her all night. He knows he’s leading this poor girl on, Bianca is her name; he’s not going to end up taking her home like he knows she’s hoping, but he needed a distraction. When he sees Y/N starting to dance with a guy, his jaw tenses and his eyes narrow; he knows he’s being stubborn. If he just talked to Y/N everything would be sorted but he doesn’t want to be the one to break, he wants Y/N to come to him, to want him. 

Their eyes meet across the dance floor, the guy’s head dipping into the crook of Y/N’s neck, his arm is wrapped around her waist as her back is pressed against his chest, grinding her bum onto his crotch. She tries to look away from George but she can’t, his eyes are enchanting and this is the most attention they’ve gotten from each other since that day in Diagon Alley. George whispers something into the girl’s ear, his grip on her hips getting tighter but his eyes never leave Y/N’s. 

It’s Y/N who breaks eye contact, her head falling back onto her dance partner’s shoulder and when George sees open mouth kisses pressed to Y/N’s neck, he snaps. He mutters an excuse to Bianca and walks as fast as he can to the girl he wants. He sees his friends snickering at each other as they dance but no one says anything.

She feels his presence before she feels him grab her wrist, so he doesn’t scare her. Her head immediately pops up, looking George in the eye. “Oi, nah. I had her first,” the guy behind Y/N says, his grip visually tightening on Y/N as if she’s a toy and George is coming to steal it, but he has to stifle a laugh; the guy’s confident, George’ll give him that.

“Nah, mate,” he starts, the music changing to a more sensual R&B song as he speaks. He sees Y/N blush at his simple words and he gently tugs at her wrist again, not in a demanding kind of way; he’s asking, pleading her to follow him and when she steps away from the guy she was dancing with, she mutters an apology before letting George drag her where he wants to go. 

----

They don’t even say two words to each other once they’re in the bathroom together. George pulls her inside quickly, before pushing her up against the door, attaching his lips immediately to her neck before he gently sucks and bites, subconsciously leaving a small hickey like it's the most natural thing in the world for him to do. She’s missed having him this close so when her fingers rake through his long hair, she gives it a gentle tug before pulling his mouth up to her own, wanting to kiss him with everything she has, needing him even closer. He obliges of course, always happy to give Y/N what she wants.

When George’s lips finally meet hers, he’s kissing her like it’s the last time they’ll ever kiss; it’s messy, desperate, like most of their kisses are, hands gripping wherever they can just to ensure the other isn’t leaving. George is intoxicating to Y/N like she can get drunk from the taste of his whiskey covered lips alone and her head spins when she feels his hands rake up her body, grasping her waist and pushing her harder against the door. A small moan leaving Y/N’s lips is all George needs to force his tongue into her mouth, massaging their tongues together and she tugs at the hair at the nape of his neck again, desperately needing him as close as humanly possible without defiling this public bathroom. The action makes George whimper, loving nothing more than having her fingers tugging at his auburn locks and it gives her a slight power trip. Just a slight one, as she tries to take control of the kiss. 

It doesn’t last long because before she knows it, she’s whimpering under his touch and surrendering everything she has to him as his hands caress her body, grabbing and pulling her to him wherever possible. His hands eventually land on her thighs, and when he grabs them and hoists her up, her legs immediately wrap around his waist. The action alongside the pressure on her crotch makes her moan and she feels George smirk at her noises, obviously feeling proud of being the only person to be able to do this to her. He pivots slightly once he’s holding her, placing Y/N on the counter next to the sink so they’re finally level to kiss comfortably. 

He keeps his spot between her legs, refusing to detach his lips from hers, his hands crawling from her thighs to tightly grasp her hips. If it was any other day, Y/N would’ve said something, telling him to be careful of bruises but right now, after watching him flirt with the girl out in the bar for hours on end, there’s nothing she wants, no needs, more than George marking her in every way he can. 

“Mine,” she moans without thinking, as his lips leave hers, slowly making their way across her jaw and onto her neck once again, licking, biting, sucking. George has always loved her neck and he knows how much she loves having her neck touched. “You’re mine,” she repeats when George doesn’t immediately push her away, and she doesn’t even have time to decide to panic before she hears a groan in her ear.

“Yours,” he whispers, his hot breath causing goosebumps to prickle along her skin. The words don’t even process in her brain before she feels George pull away from her. The lack of contact makes her whine, she never wants to be far away from George ever again but he smiles, presses the most gentle kiss on her lips before looking her directly in her eyes, “I’m yours.” 

Her heart stops, she never thought for a second she’d hear George mutter those words, let alone in a dingey, small bathroom of a bar in Central London, but here it is. “Don’t play with me, Georgie,” she whispers. From her spot on the counter, she can look him directly in the eyes; his cheeks are flushed red, his pupils are blown, lips swollen and red. His hair has gotten messy from her pulling at it but she can’t bring herself to feel bad that she ruined his perfectly styled hair because at this moment, she thinks this is the most beautiful she’s ever seen him, so vulnerable and the look of adoration in his eyes fills her chest with hope. 

“Would I ever play with you, darling?” He asks, his words are sincere and she knows it. It’s soft, reminiscent of all those times he’s looked after her after having sex, when he promises to look after her, always. 

“I’d hope not, I was having fun with…” She trails off, realising she never caught his name before she starts laughing. She feels George’s hands tighten against her thighs, hyperaware of his touch on her skin and she grabs one of his hands. “I didn’t actually know his name. I was pretending he was you.”

She says it so softly she wouldn’t be shocked if he missed it, but he didn’t. He hangs to every word she says, he always does and when he smiles, Y/N feels herself relax. “I was using Bianca to make you jealous,” he admits, laughing to himself. He knew the pair of them were being stupid, that they could have just talked but the fear of rejection clearly got the best of both of them. 

“I’ve liked you for so long, and maybe I shouldn't have put friends with benefits on the table knowing that, but I needed you.” He’s never spoken truer words, his left hand leaving her thigh and gently caressing her cheek. Her makeups smudged from both the sweat from dancing and the desperation from not even five minutes ago, her hairs messy and her lips are swollen just as much as his but he wants to take her home, right this second, and show her in so many ways how much he loves her.

“I like you, too.” 

His eyes prick up at her words and he didn’t realise he wasn’t holding eye contact until now. She takes her own left hand and mirrors George’s action on himself; hoping to convey everything she’s felt for him through nothing but looks. “I had to back away last week, I thought I had to get over you. Angie said some dumb shit and I started to overthink and I’m so-”

He cuts her off with a kiss and it’s so different to their usual ones. It’s soft and gentle like they could stay here for hours doing nothing but kissing and they’d be perfectly content. George pulls her body closer to his, desperate just to have her near when he pulls away, pressing his forward to hers. “Don’t say sorry, please.” 

She opens her mouth again to speak and that’s when he cuts her off again, with another kiss. This happens a few times before Y/N is a giggling mess and George is just kissing her for the sake of having their lips pressed together. “We know now, that’s all I care about.” 

This makes her smile and her heart soar; the boy she’s loved for so long, liking her back once felt like it could only be a dream, and she has to pinch herself multiple times before she finally believes it’s her reality.

They soon realise they’ve been standing in this dirty, bar bathroom for way too long and George helps her down, grabbing her by the hips to stabilise her when her legs slightly give out. He takes her hand in his, softly kissing her knuckles before he opens the bathroom door to sneak out. “My place or yours?” he asks, but he quickly stops, “I’m not expecting to fuck, but like I mean if it happens it happens but- Godric, we can just hang out I’m happy with that unless you want to fuck-”

Y/N’s giggling at his stumbling around on words and she shushes him slightly, his face going bright red when she's the one leaning to press a chaste kiss to his lips. His face is bright red when she speaks, “My place. I live alone.” she winks and runs off after saying this, George hot on her tails and even though there’s music and George’s favourite song is playing, Y/N’s laugh as he chases her out of the bar is his favourite noise. 

[scarletemeterio-thesecond]

r u open for sum douxie requests? Him Falling in love with king arthur's daughter💕who's innocent n kind but she isn't happy at camelot she wants to be independent n arthur's like NOPE so she runs away n meets douxie again centuries later n is now a total badass witch but she's sarcastic n mean cuz girl has been THROUGH IT😔 but slowly she warms up to him n falls in love with him all over again cuz with douxie she cant help but be soft💕😭 *u can ignore this ask if u want my English is bad😅*

i absolutely loved this request! i think i did things a bit differently but i'm a sucker for love and i couldn't help it lol. i loved writing this, thank you for requesting and i hope you like it!

•••

Back To You (Douxie x Fem!Reader)

Warnings: none i think

Genre: Fluff, some angst

Fandom: Tales of Arcadia, Wizards

Summary: See request

Word Count: 3379

Reader uses she/her pronouns!

•••

Being king Arthur’s daughter was already hard enough, but being a witch didn’t make things easier. (Y/N) loved magic, even if her father wasn’t a huge fan of it. She started taking an interest in it at a very young age, and her own aunt ended up being her teacher.

As (Y/N) got older, her magic grew stronger as well and even though she knew her father loved her, she could also see the way he looked at her sometimes; he looked at her like she was a stranger, a monster even.

Life in the palace was always a bit boring. The princess didn’t have many friends and most of the time would end up feeling lonely. But that all changed once Merlin decided to get a new apprentice.

They hit it off right away. (Y/N) was excited to have someone around her age close to her and the boy was happy to be surrounded by so many talented people.

But of course, he was a bit nervous about being so close to the princess at first, and he didn’t really understand why she was around so much until he saw her do magic. He was mesmerized and extremely surprised, to say the least.

‘’I didn’t know you could do that,’’ he said once the girl was done with her spell.

‘’What do you mean?’’ The girl asked.

‘’Well, you’re the princess and everyone in the kingdom knows that but it’s not known that you can do magic,’’ he explained.

‘’Oh,’’ she murmured, a bit sad but not surprised. ‘’Well, my father doesn’t really like magic so I guess he’s always been a bit disappointed at my love for it.’’

‘’Come on, why don’t we take a walk around the castle?’’ He offered, trying to cheer her up.

Their friendship grew stronger with every passing day, and it didn’t take long for the young boy to start developing feelings for the sweet princess. She was a really powerful witch but she still had her feet on the ground and remained kind as always; he loved that about her. He also loved her smile and the way she made him feel when they were together.

(Y/N) could tell that there was something going on with her friend; she noticed how nervous he got when she was around, the way he stuttered and blushed. She thought that it was very cute, and it didn’t take her long to realize why he’d been acting like that. But she was still afraid of being wrong, so even though she also had feelings for the boy, she remained silent.

They were oblivious about the way they felt about each other, but everyone else wasn’t. They pretty much acted like a couple already to the eyes of strangers, and also to the eyes of the king.

The relationship between Arthur and his daughter had never been worse. The more she practiced her magic, the more they grew apart. They’d barely talk to each other. (Y/N) hated this, she wanted to be close to her father, but she knew that it would be useless to try to work things out; her father disapproved of anything she did or said. She was supposed to learn how to be a proper princess and future queen, and soon it would be time for her to get married. So of course, her closeness to Merlin’s apprentice was alarming to Arthur, and he decided to confront her at dinner one night.

‘’So, tell me about this apprentice boy,’’ he said to her. He’d requested to have dinner alone with her, and they were seated face to face with each other.

‘’His name is Hisirdoux,’’ she mentioned. ‘’And is this what you wanted to talk about? My friend?’’

‘’Well, he’s not just your friend, right? Rumors travel fast inside the castle, my dear.’’

‘’We’re just friends,’’ she mumbled loud enough for the king to hear.

‘’You sound almost disappointed at those words,’’ he pointed out. He made a pause to drink some of his wine and then he looked at his daughter. ‘’I don’t like him.’’

‘’Here we go…,’’ she sighed and sank in her seat, not wanting to hear what her dad was about to say.

‘’He’s a wizard apprentice, (Y/N). Could you imagine what people would say if you even thought about being with him?’’

‘’What does it matter what people think? I can do magic, too, father. I know you’ve been hiding it from the rest of the kingdom, hiding me. I’m tired of being a secret, of not being myself.’’

‘’For the sake of the kingdom, you should get married to an appropriate suitor.’’

‘’For the sake of the kingdom? Why don’t you just admit that you can’t accept the fact that I’m a witch, father? Are you really that ashamed of me? Or are you actually afraid?’’ The princess said in a defying tone.

‘’Young lady-.’’

‘’No, you’re not gonna do this anymore,’’ she interrupted him. ‘’Why can’t you just accept me? It’s like you don’t even want me to be happy. Magic makes me happy, Douxie makes me happy and I’m tired of you trying to control me just because you can’t accept people who are different!’’ (Y/N) got up from her seat and started walking away.

‘’Where do you think you’re going?’’ Yelled her father.

She stopped walking for a second to turn around and look at him. ‘’Away from you,’’ she answered. What he didn’t know was that she really meant it; she would go as far away as possible.

…

Once she got to her room, she started packing some of her stuff, and when she was done she decided to write a letter. She knew she would go and say goodbye to Douxie, but she wanted him to know some things that she wouldn’t be able to say out loud.

A couple of minutes later, she was ready to go, to leave that place for good. It was late at night but she knew her friend would still be awake, so she decided to head over to his room. Just as she was about to walk out of her room for the last time, she heard some guards approaching. The princess cursed to herself but quickly remembered that there was another way for her to leave without being noticed, Douxie’s room and hers were connected by some secret tunnels they’d made with magic a while back, tunnels that extended throughout the entire castle.

Once she reached the boy’s door, she started knocking like crazy. Douxie opened the door almost immediately and even though he was happy to see her, he could tell that there was something wrong.

‘’(Y/N), what’s wrong?’’

‘’I’m afraid we don’t have time for that, Douxie. I don’t really know how to say this but I wanted to tell you that I’m leaving,’’ she said.

‘’What? Where?’’

‘’I don’t know, to be honest. Somewhere my father won’t find me, somewhere I can be free.’’

He was shocked, to say the least. Deep down, he knew she wasn’t happy with her life in the castle, but this news still surprised him. ‘’I’m going with you,’’ he said and started looking for some stuff to pack. She grabbed him by his shoulders and stopped him.

‘’No, Douxie. I can’t let you do that, okay? You still have a lot to learn from Merlin, I know you have potential and I just can’t take this opportunity for you.’’

‘’But I want to be with you, wherever you go.’’

‘’Trust me, there’s nothing I’d want more, but we can’t,’’ she paused to take a deep breath; she could already feel the tears forming in her eyes. ‘’I wrote you a letter, there are some things I’d like you to know.’’ She grabbed the piece of paper and handed it to him.

‘’(Y/N), please…’’ He begged, he didn’t even know what he was begging for, he just knew that the situation they were in was extremely unfair.

‘’I know my father will be here any minute with his guards, you have to pretend like you haven’t seen me, okay?’’ Her tears were already falling down her cheeks, and so were his. She grabbed the boy’s hands and looked him in the eye. ‘’Promise me you’ll do that, Douxie. You have to act like you have no idea about me suddenly disappearing, yeah?’’

‘’Yeah,’’ he nodded. ‘’I promise, (Y/N).’’

She wrapped her arms around his neck and he wrapped his around her waist, holding on to each other as if their lives depended on it. When they pulled apart, they pressed their foreheads together.

‘’Thank you for everything, Douxie. I’ll miss you so much.’’

‘’I’ll miss you, too, (Y/N).’’ They finally pulled away and she walked over to his door, hoping no one would see her. She opened it a little and when she saw that no one was around, she knew it was time to leave. The girl looked back to Douxie one last time and smiled at him. When she was about to leave, she heard the boy speak. ‘’I will find you, (Y/N). I won’t stop until I do, I promise.’’

‘’I can only hope you will,’’ she said before walking away.

…

(Y/N) was right, it didn’t take long for the king and his guards to get to his room. They were looking for the princess, but she was nowhere to be found, and Douxie was just as oblivious to the situation as everyone else.

After the guards made sure she wasn’t hidden in his room, they left. As soon as the door was closed, the boy fell to the floor. He brought his knees to his chest and started crying; he just couldn’t believe what had happened. He couldn’t believe his favorite person was gone.

He knew she was a witch, a powerful one, which meant she’d be able to live for a long time, just like him, but the world was a huge place and deep down he knew there was the possibility of never seeing her again.

Douxie tried to calm himself down, took some deep breaths, and ran his hands through his hair. Then, he remembered the letter, the last piece of her that he had.

He grabbed it and quickly opened it. First, he admired her handwriting, beautiful as always and then he started reading.

Dear Douxie,

If you’re reading this, it means that I’ve finally left. Deep down I think we all knew the palace wasn’t my place, I just never belonged inside these walls, but that doesn’t erase how much it hurts me to leave you.

You changed my life, Douxie, turned all the black and white into full colour, and I couldn’t be more thankful for that. You’re so important to me, I don’t think you understand how much you matter to me. You were my first real friend, you taught me what it meant to fully trust someone with your entire heart… and I guess you also taught me what love is. It’d be useless to try and hide it any longer, it’s been a while since there was something more than just a friendship between us. I wish I’d been brave enough to tell you sooner, to do something about it, but I didn’t. All I can say right now is that I love you, that I’m in love with you and that I’ll do anything I can to go back to you; I mean it, Douxie, I won’t stop until we’re together again because I know in my heart that these feelings will never go away, you mean the world to me.

Thank you for always being there when I needed you.

(Y/N).

Douxie didn’t know when he’d started crying, but he couldn’t stop. He covered his mouth with his hand to silence a sob, and then he wiped some tears off his face.

‘’I love you, too, (Y/N), and I’ll find you, no matter what,’’ he mumbled, making a promise to her once again, and also to himself.

...

900 years later

(Y/N) was just walking around the streets of Arcadia, minding her own business when suddenly she bumped into someone.

‘’Oh, I’m so sorry, I should’ve been more careful,’’ she said, apologizing to the person in front of her.

She barely even paid attention to the whole situation and was ready to keep walking, but she stopped in her tracks when she heard a voice. The same voice she’d dreamt about hearing again, the same voice she’d missed ever since that day in the castle. He only said her name, but that was enough for her heart to start racing.

(Y/N) turned around and their eyes locked, time seemed to have stopped. She barely had any time to properly react before his arms were wrapped around her body, and instinctively her arms did the same thing.

‘’Please tell me this is not a dream,’’ he said once they pulled apart.

‘’Douxie,’’ she mumbled, still unable to believe that it was really him. He let out a sigh when he heard her; he missed hearing her say his nickname, the one she’d given to him, the one he ended up using all the time because it reminded him of her.

‘’It’s me, (Y/N), I’m here. I said I would find you, that’s what kept me going for so long.’’ He said, truly speaking from the heart.

‘’I started losing hope a long time ago, to be honest,’’ she said. She wanted to hug him again, to tell him how much she’d missed him and how she was still head over heels for him, but she couldn’t. The past had changed her, she had to change in order to survive and she’d learned to be afraid of trusting people, even the ones she loved the most.

‘’What are you even doing here, though?’’

‘’I honestly don’t know, I just kind of ended up here I guess.’’

There was a pause between them. It all happened so fast, just a few minutes ago the hope of seeing each other again was nonexistent.

‘’I missed you so much, (Y/N). There’s so much I want to talk about and so much I want to hear from you. I-I can’t believe it’s really you.’’ She smiled at him, not really knowing what to answer. ‘’I still have your letter, there hasn’t been a day in which I didn’t think about it and what you said in it.’’

(Y/N) opened her eyes. She thought about that later almost every day, also remembering her words, her confession.

Douxie noticed that there was something wrong, it was evident in her silence, in how tense she seemed. He tried to grab her hand but she refused, taking a small step backward.

‘’Hey, what’s wrong?’’ He didn’t get an answer, just a scared and worried look in response. ‘’Look, do you think you could meet me after work tonight? I’d like to catch up with you and talk about everything, I guess.’’

‘’I- uh, I don’t know, I-.’’

‘’Please, (Y/N). I think we owe it to each other.’’

She took a deep breath and made eye contact with him for a split second. ‘’Okay, tell me where do you work.’’

…

Douxie’s shift was about to end. He was nervous, he couldn’t wait to see her again. When they saw each other earlier, he noticed she was acting a bit weird. Of course, he hadn’t seen her for nine centuries, but that wasn’t the (Y/N) he remembered. She was different, distant and cold. Deep down, he even thought if maybe he’d already lost her, nine hundred years was a long time after all.

He was closing the restaurant when he saw the girl approaching him.

‘’Hey,’’ she said once they were face to face.

‘’Hi, I’m glad you came.’’ There was a small silence between them. (Y/N) started playing with her fingers, trying to calm herself down. ‘’Listen, I know it’s late but would you like to walk around while we talk?’’

‘’Of course, yeah.’’ They immediately started walking.

‘’I have so much I want to say, but first I wanna hear about you, (Y/N). What have you been up to?’’

‘’Well, trying to put these last nine centuries into words would be a bit difficult. I haven’t been doing much, really, just trying to hide my magic from everyone, seems like I’ll always have to.’’ She mumbled the last part, but he could still hear her. It was evident she was talking about her father, who she hadn't seen since that night in the castle. ‘’What about you?’’

‘’Pretty much the same thing, I guess. I don’t usually stay that much in the same place, though. You know, always looking the same could raise suspicion.’’

‘’Yeah, tell me about it. After a while some people just start spying on you because they know there's something going on, or at least that happened to me.’’

They reached a bench and decided to sit down. (Y/N) tried to keep a bit of distance between them, something that the boy noticed, and he tried to hide his sad expression at the girls' action. They stayed quiet for a bit, the girl admired the stars while also allowing herself to enjoy the boy's company, even if deep down she knew she shouldn't have.

"I'm in love with you, too," said Douxie, breaking the silence and immediately creating a bit of tension in the air. "I still do, and I know I always will; my biggest regret is not telling you sooner, when we were together back in the castle." The girl opened her mouth to say something but Douxie didn't let her, he grabbed one of her hands and slowly caressed it before he kept talking. "Finding you is what kept me going for so long, I said it earlier, but it's true. This may seem like I'm trying to rush things but I think we've been apart for too long to keep waiting, (Y/N)."

He slowly grabbed her face and ran a finger along her cheek, pulling her closer to him, but she pulled away. "I can't, Douxie. I truly can't."

"What do you mean? Did you find someone else? Do you not love me anymore? It's okay if you don't, nine centuries is a long time-."

"I do still feel things for you, but these last years have been very hard, Douxie. I've learnt not to trust people, even those closest to me. Please, don't take this personally, it's not your fault."

He slowly nodded and then made eye contact with her. "I understand, I know how you're feeling, trust me. I also understand if you're not ready, and I would wait for you for a hundred lifetimes, my dear."

"I want to be ready, Douxie, I truly do. I want to be with you, it's what I've wanted ever since we'd walk around the castle, running away from Merlin or my father." She paused for a bit, taking a deep breath; it's like she was at war with herself, she'd been for a long time, but she was tired of fighting, of hiding, she wanted to let her walls down. "Maybe we could take things slowly," she said. They looked at each other and he caressed her cheek once again.

"Of course, my love, anything you need."

She leaned on his hand and closed her eyes, enjoying his warmth after so many years. "Would you kiss me?" she asked.

He simply grabbed her face and slowly pulled her closer to him, and finally their lips touched.

"I love you so much, (Y/N)," he whispered once they pulled away.

"I love you, too, Douxie."

They sat side by side and the girl rested her head on his shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around her. They didn't say anything, they didn't have to, they both knew what they were feeling at that moment. They were finally complete, and it was like every single bad thing they had to go through was worth it, because it had led them to that moment, to their encounter.

[heartslobbf]

let’s talk about perfuma. imo, she’s one of the best characters in the show despite being underdeveloped, and i wanna explain why. she could’ve been extremely average, just some lanky flower girl that doesn’t believe in violence and loves everyone, but she is so much more than that (and it pisses me off that y’all reduce her to that).

in her introductory episode, perfuma is clearly in denial about the horde almost destroying plumeria. she doesn’t want to acknowledge the problem, wants someone else to take care of it for her. she’s scared of change, and that is because change makes you vulnerable. if things always stay the same, there’s a whole lot less danger and uncertainty, and therefore you’re safe. secure. perfuma’s kingdom is dying and she can’t bear to accept it because it is unknown to her. it’s putting her in a position where she is no longer secure. this fear of vulnerability can also be seen at the beginning of 1x10 when the princess alliance falls apart and she literally says ‘being together makes us vulnerable.’

the thing is, perfuma isn’t wrong. look at her choice of words. she says that being together makes them vulnerable, not weak. here, she kind of has the words mixed up, but we see that by s5 she has come to understand the difference. that’s what’s so great about perfuma, her motivation to do better, her hunger for self-improvement. it’s why she’s such an important part of catra’s redemption, actually, because she embodies the kind person catra is or wants to be.

let me explain: perfuma is an angry, impatient, short-tempered character. we are shown this again and again with her passive aggression to others and how easily mermista can annoy her with trivial things (sitting in her seat in the war room, for example). catra is also an angry, impatient character, but perfuma works every day to manage those emotions. she knows she needs them, she uses them as a tool (calling catra out, for example, is a time they were practically pivotal for getting her point across) but she also acknowledges they can hurt the people she loves. we know she does a meditation ritual each morning and we see in 4x02 how quickly she can unravel without it. she wants to be better. she puts the work in. that is such a valuable lesson for a character like catra who has always felt she’s just not good enough, she’s always going to be this angry and unlovable and no one can do anything about it.

so, 4x02. it’s a brilliant episode for perfuma’s character, really, and the first proper development we’ve had since 1x04. we see her anger, her impatience, but we also see her self-doubt. her belief that she’s inadequate, ‘just a flower girl.’ this is also when we get introduced to her little mantra that becomes a bit of a motif later on, ‘i can do this.’ we know perfuma doesn’t wholeheartedly believe this, but she says it anyway because she wants to. perfuma wants to be better. she will do whatever she can to be her best self, whether that be actually conquering her gripes with cacti or realising there’s a loophole with the roots (love that conflict resolution by the way, another good deconstruction of hero bs by spop).

this episode is also significant because it comes back to perfuma’s fear of change, of vulnerability. she’s thrown into a situation she doesn’t want to be in, one she feels miserably unprepared for, and she hasn’t done the one thing that puts her at her best beforehand, but she pulls through in the end because she is surrounded by people that support her, that listened to her and consoled her when she was vulnerable. 4x02 teaches perfuma the power of self-worth and the power of true, mutual, unconditional love, which can only come with vulnerability.

and this is where her character gets really interesting, in my humble opinion. ngl, one of the reasons i love perfuma so much is because she’s a pisces and i am too. i’m not gonna go astrology hoe on you rn, i’m just using this to demonstrate the part of her character that teaches others. pisces, if you don’t know, love to play therapist. we like to help the people around us with whatever strifes they may have because we think we’re fucking great at it. perfuma actually is.

you know how i said perfuma learns the importance of self-belief and vulnerability? yeah, she teaches both of those lessons to other characters in s5. like i said, perfuma is a character who values self-betterment and also happens to be a pisces, so when she sees scorpia, riddled with so much self-doubt and such low self-esteem, her immediate response is just i’m gonna teach that bitch how to love herself. and she does!

i’ve seen some people say they don’t like scorfuma because it seemed as though the writers just decided to ‘fix’ all of scorpia’s problems by giving her a girlfriend. that’s very dumb, first of all because they aren’t even together by the end of the show, they’re just interested in one another. second, the whole point of she-ra is that we’re stronger together. scorpia doesn’t go through growth in s5 because a girl likes her, she goes through growth because someone is showing her support and love for the first time in her life and that empowers her. you know, the worth that scorpia finds in herself doesn’t hinge on perfuma, like it did with catra. it’s about her as an individual, and perfuma so clearly makes it about that when her big lesson revolves around singing. scorpia loves singing. perfuma tells her she should do it because she enjoys it, a sentiment you’d never hear in the horde, and when scorpia does sing, she is actively rejecting the people who did make all her self-worth hinge on them catra. she’s doing something for herself, because she enjoys it, because it makes her happy, because she can.

it’s that same mantra: i can do this, i can do this. i really love how this was brought back from 4x02, how perfuma repurposed something that taught her such a valuable lesson for someone else. perfuma and scorpia are great foil characters actually, both constantly underestimated and thought of as weak by their groups, but some of the strongest characters in the show due to their deep value of love and self. i can do this, and i know i can because you believe in me, because i believe in myself. it’s brought back again in 5x10, when the last thing perfuma says before scorpia breaks the beam is ‘i know you can [pull through]’. she tells catra she believes in scorpia. it’s that belief, that support from other people that empowers the self to believe it too. we are stronger together, you know??

anyways, onto vulnerability. return to the fright zone is in my top ten episodes of the whole fucking show and you might think that’s a bit weird but i don’t. 5x10 encompasses so many important themes of spop so well and tells them with scorfuma and spinnetossa, our two side lesbian couples. this is significant since perfuma literally draws a parallel between her and catra at the end of the episode, and catradora and spinnetossa have always been significant to one another. i’m gonna say it, perfuma is the reason catra is finally able to confess to adora in 5x13. i’ve already talked about how important perfuma is to catra’s motivation to improve, but she literally makes catra rethink everything about strength and vulnerability, two words catra has a lot of feelings about.

catra fears vulnerability. we know this. she has such a deep love for those important to her but is never able to articulate it because she worries she’ll be taken advantage of, shot down, laughed at, whatever. all of this stems from the abuse she suffered at shadow weaver’s hands and her attachment issues, and it’s also why catra pretends to hate scorpia’s very open displays of affection and love: she sees it as weak because she has been taught to, but it’s all she ever really wanted to be.

we also know perfuma used to fear vulnerability. she doesn’t any more. the entirety of the episode leading up to her and catra’s heart-to-heart is her being vulnerable, putting herself in a position where she’s in danger but believing it’s worth it. and it is. despite what everyone said to her, perfuma is right: it was worth it. she got through to scorpia, even if it was only for a moment. she literally spells it out to us and catra with one of the best lines in the whole show: it’s hard, keeping your heart open. it makes you vulnerable, but it doesn’t make you weak, and i have to believe it’s worth it.

back in 1x10, perfuma was right: being together makes you vulnerable. horde prime tries to use people’s relationships against them, that’s literally the plot of save the cat, the point of pitting catra and adora against one another. he sees them as weak, just like shadow weaver deems adora’s feelings for catra ‘confusing’, just like light hope insisted adora was a danger to her friends as long as she was around them. they were all wrong. yes, they’re vulnerable. perfuma acknowledges that vulnerability puts you in danger, that it’s difficult to do that, but she knows it doesn’t make you weak. weakness vs strength is a big conflict in 5x10 literally introduced to us with netossa’s theories on everyone’s weaknesses in the first few minutes.

like perfuma says, friendship isn’t a weakness. it’s her greatest strength. her belief in love is literally what saves her and adora’s lives, it’s what saves everyone who got chipped, glimmer, bow. belief in love, both of others and yourself, is what saves adora in her dying moments. perfuma summarises she-ra’s entire fucking message to us repeatedly in 5x10 and she tells it to catra because catra is the one who will do the most with it. that glance at adora, it’s obvious what it means. perfuma is telling catra she should be open with adora about her feelings because you have to believe it’s worth it.

you won’t get anywhere waiting for other people to make the move. she-ra couldn’t heal plumeria’s lands, so plumeria had to fight their own battle alongside her no matter how much they felt unable to. the rebellion couldn’t move mara’s ship, so perfuma had to despite thinking she wasn’t strong enough. the reason they always win in the end is because they have each other, they have love and support and people motivating them to do better. just like perfuma motivates herself to do better.

it’s the mantra. i can do this. i can be vulnerable and still win, because i have love. and it’s hard, it’s so fucking hard to be vulnerable when you’ve feared it all your life and you’re so angry, so hurt, but you have to believe it’s worth it. and it is. it is, it is, it is, love is stronger than anything and being vulnerable for the people you love is the only way you can ever get what you want from them. perfuma as a character embodies that, having learnt it herself, and teaches the lesson to one of the characters who needs it the most.

adora is dying, and catra loves her, and she knows she does, and she just has to believe. adora is dying, and she loves catra, and she knows she does, but she doesn’t believe. not until catra teaches her too, in that moment, to realise they were all wrong, light hope, shadow weaver, horde prime. adora doesn’t need to let go, she needs to hold on and believe she will be pulled back up by the girl she loves. she needs to believe she deserves it. that it’s worth it.

and it is.