#i am at my fucking limit

[same-crazy-art-girl34]

THIS IS MY LAST STRAW

[novantinuum]

POV: you are watching a non-anime show and have the audacity to call a character development episode "filler" because you don't understand what that word actually means

i burst through your window and throw a barrel at your head, killing you instantly

[tianshanforlife]

I think I just died and went straight to heaven 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️

The calm before the storm... This will hurt so much more than I ever anticipated...

[vanrouge13]

‼️‼️‼️SPOILERS FOR CHAP 7 PART 5 UNDA THE CUT‼️‼️‼️

OUH MY GOD. I JUST REALIZED THAT THE ONE TIME LILIA SAID “MY SINGING CAN LULL ANY CHILD TO SLEEP” OR SMTH LIKE THAT IS ACTUALLY TRUE BC WHEN HE SANG TO SILVER AS A BABY, HE IMMEDIATELY GOES TO SLEEP HOW DID I NOT REALIZE THIS EARLIER ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️

I am going insane.

[mimzicreations]

[erika-xero]

Thinking a lot of how social media affect art, how it is getting increasingly more difficult to earn money with it and honestly it just... makes me so sad?.. Disclaimer: I do not want you to pity me. I just want to share some thoughts. Some fears, maybe. Some regrets.

I know that I might never be able to make a good fortune by drawing illustrations, because it seems that I was entirely wrong with my priorities? I always wanted to do more: bigger pieces, more characters and hidden details. I wanted my art to tell a story, if possible.

Who could possible know that most of the people will move to mobile devices with small vertical screens, on which wide detailed illustrations with cinematic feel will look the worst?

Who could possible know that the algorythms of the social media would want you to draw MORE yet, somehow, draw less? I could go insane doing the same stuff over and over again: small portraits, halfbodies in the same simplistic style because they look best in instagram or on tumblr mobile app and gather more attention? And they are also faster to make, thus you can please the allmightly algorythm posting every day or two?..

I love my work, I adore doing various things, I love it when one week I work on a traditional art fullbody with a golden halo and the other three weeks - on a digital artwork with a dynamic fighting scene. But gods. How tiring is it to know that the piece you've been working on will get barely any attention, because three-weeks gap in my posting schedule will, for sure, upset the allmighty algorithm.

They say that it is always bad to switch style or a theme, because people get upset and unfollow you once they see something they aren't waiting to see. Different character body type? Unfollowing. Different facial feature? Unfollowing. Different aesthetic? Unfollowing.

Slightly different shading and coloring? Unfollowing.

But variety has key importance to me. I wish to draw characters which are drastically different from each other. I want to experiment. I want to explore. I want a drawing to be a puzzle I will be solving for hours, days, weeks, never getting bored. I do not wish my work to become a rutine to serve the algorithm or even the general public.

I see, like, those commercially succesfull artists, who post every day earning more money per week than I will be ever earning per month. It is all the same story over and over again: conventionally attractive characters. Halfbodies. Pleasant facial expressions: faint smiles, slightly raised eyebrows. Simple pose, 3/4, detailed clothing. Always the same stylistic choises. Always the same aesthetic.

Of course, sometimes they do draw stronger, bigger pieces, they experiment, they search for something new - but mostly secretely. In private. During the free time they earn - by their hard work and dedication.

I... can not afford drawing stuff for myself in my free time. Honestly, I don't have free time either than the time I spend on my trips to hometown - the only moments I could spend with my family. Neither can I draw five similar pieces in a row, because my brain starts to melt like a strawberry sundae?.. Because when I get bored, I lose concentration? Because, I made variety the key feature of my art and this turned out to be the worst decision an artist can make?

Am I just... weak? Am I stupid? Am I unworthy? Am I childish for wanting my job to be fun and entertaining and fulfilling to do?

There's this group chat I am in, and today someone, the succesful artist, said that anyone, who has less than 10K followers are, to say so, a no one? All of a sudden I feel so upset. My day is ruined. I never had 10K anywhere but VK (which is absolutely useless to anyone doing commissions). I never even cared about numbers... I never wanted to be big. Be popular. For most of the time, my biggest wish was to feel... fulfilled? To be happy, be proud of what I am doing?

I feel fulfilled. But I also don't want to starve myself to death. And I certainly feel like if I, one day, will want to have family, I wouldn't be able to make enough money to afford having a child.

Was I... entirely wrong? Did I waste my time chasing phantoms? Is it too late for me? Will I be among those, who might not survive the hard times, at least, as an artist?

[urfavbasicbitch]

I swear to god I’m so mad at yeonggi! my boy needs to be a little selfish sometimes because it’s okay! he’s always thinking about everyone else’s well-being rather than his own. it’s clear to everybody that he likes shin-ae and she likes him but he keeps pushing her off as if this is going to change anything.

I SWEAR I’M STRESSED! these kids are going to give me a heart attack or something before this webtoon comes to an end.

nana better knock some sense on him before I do it because honestly I’m tired

Quimchee as soon as we find out who you are trust, you’ll be dealt with!

[wiregrrrl]

cutting corners is not enough, I need to destroy the concept of "backgrounds"

[ugh-yoongi]

respectfully can yoongi please fuck off for the love of god!!!

[prexrinemex]

That moment when you draw something then color it and ACTUALLY like the finished result only for it to be RAINED ON

[nightingalesighs]

I’ve got a fucking migraine. The adhesive on this fucking monitor is sensory hell. I cannot get fucking comfortable.

[rizzmin]

lmao today just keeps getting worse and worse

[binch-i-might-be]

*item won't scan* customer: oh it's free then ;)))

I will literally kill you I hate you so much I cast a curse on your lineage literally shut the fuck up oh my god you're so quirky hahahaha FUNNY SHUT UP JUST LET ME DO MY STUPID DEMEANING IDIOT MINIMUM WAGE JOB I HATE YOU I HOPE YOU DIE I HOPE WE BOTH DIE

[sunflowerinc]

I need a hug so bad rn

[ayakashibackstreet]

UAM don't fuck up the subject registration challenge (IMPOSSIBLE) (GONE WRONG) (GONE SEXUAL)

[razorblade180]

A cockroach fell from the ceiling and landed on me. Today no longer matters.