#i am sick about this man

[glitterguts13]

Do you have any favourite of hcs (any kind) of aventurine?

Oh, I have so much to say about Aventurine it's not even funny, so here comes a jumbled mix of thoughts.

TW: topics of slavery, self-harm, sexual abuse, and suicidal ideation. Please read with caution!

Aventurine struggles with genuine physical and emotional intimacy. Having been used, abused, and tortured all this life, mentally, sexually, and physically, he's grown to learn that people are to be kept at arm's length the whole time.

Because of this, Aventurine became very hyper-sexual to deal with the trauma. To him, if he starts it and stays in control, he can't be hurt. This isn't true at all, but it's the only way he knows how to handle people who start getting touchy with him because saying 'no' never worked in the past.

If someone does manage to break down his walls and form a genuine emotional bond with him...he really doesn't know what to do. He showers his partners with gifts and money, is extremely sex driven, and doesn't have any consideration for his own well-being. He's so worried about losing them, that he gives too much.

Aventurine doesn't know how to ask for things he wants. In the sense, he doesn't know how to say "Please, just hold my hand." or "Will you brush my hair?" These simple little acts of love that he desperately craves, but can't ask for because he's worried he's being needy.

For fucks sake just hold this man and remind him that his worth isn't tied to his wealth or his body.

The hand that trembles, hold it tightly and press it to your lips. He'll fall to pieces.

Aventurine is torn between desperately wanting a family and being terrified of having one. He wants a partner, children, and a home to come back to that's filled with love, warmth, and laughter...but he knows how quickly he could lose it, and just how big a target is painted on his back. It keeps him up at night, debating back and forth on if he should pursue his desire or leave it to rot like the rest of his dreams.

Topaz is the closest thing to a 'friend' he has inside of the IPC. While they're hardly besties, she's at least someone he can relax around and share a few drinks with. She's not given him any reason to distrust her, but I don't think he would ever fully rely on her either.

Has played his fair share of Russian Roulette, and leaves disappointed each time he wins.

Also, are we all just going to ignore that little tidbit where they mention he was strapped to an electric chair?? I can't even begin to imagine how that fucked him up both mentally and physically.

That being said, Aventurine has a lot of self-harm and pain-seeking tendencies. I won't go into details, but when he gets low, his mind begins to spiral and he has to find something to snap him out of it or else it just gets worse and worse until he's ready to make sure that gun is fully loaded.

He's grown better about it over the years, but he will never fully be able to heal and recover. Especially not as long as he's in the hands of the IPC. Ratio is the only one who catches wind of Aventurine's self-harming tendencies, but he doesn't have a clue on how to help him, so he keeps quiet.

The brand on his neck is a source of contention. He has the money to have it removed and covered up. He hates to see it, but in the same breath, he's almost afraid to lose it. If he does, will he lose sight of his past? Where he came from? He isn't ashamed of his past, but he also doesn't like the very clear reminder of it either. Jade makes passion comments on it often, and it makes his stomach twist everytime.

Donates obscene amounts of money to children in need. He will never let a child suffer, and while he clearly can't dismantle the entire fucked up system set in place, he's bought the contracts of many child slaves and freed them anonymously. He wants to save them all, but it just isn't possible, and it's one more thing that keeps him awake at night.

[sithis-has-no-balls]

Had something to say about Mannimarco, got distracted, promptly forgot it. I guarantee you this is for the best as it was foul.

[tagzpite]

i did the thing

[hyunpic]

hyunjin on bubble: thank you for wishing me happy birthday today. it was fun

[sxturdaysun]

i am once again saying that there is nothing wrong with being a non-sharing selfshipper. there's nothing wrong with blocking people who share one (or multiple) of your f/os. there's nothing wrong with telling doubles not to interact with you. setting boundaries for yourself and your online space is a moral neutral and has nothing to do with being "insecure" or some other negative. if you find that insulting or belittling, that's on you; not on the person setting the boundary. quit trying to make non-sharers into bad guys.

[hazel2468]

Look-

Anyone who tries telling you that both parties are the same and there is no point in voting? Has a fucking agenda, and it's a nasty one.

Do the Dems disappoint me? Yes, constantly. Do I have gripes with Biden? 100%.

Do I also recognize that he has GOTTEN SHIT DONE and that those things are like. NOT talked about by people my age because it feels better to be angry and constantly demanding better while being unwilling to put up with Average Joe who is ACTUALLY doing things that progressives have been asking for for AGES (putting caps on medication prices, working to cancel student and medical debt, investing in infrastructure and going after inflation, started working on protecting reproductive rights after Trump put in place the shitty judges who wrecked Roe, is trying to go after how weed is scheduled and pardoned all federal offenses, et-fucking-cetera).

Not only do I actually LIKE some of the shit Biden is doing? If Trump gets back in office? People will die. He and his have been OPEN about the fact that they want to go (somehow) even MORE fascist.

Fucking vote. Anyone telling you not to has your worst interests at heart. Be as pissed off as you want, but fucking VOTE. Because we have a chance of continuing to push a president like Biden towards the change we want to see. We have ZERO chance of that with Trump, or someone like him.

[chuckyray]

the walten files fans try not to demonize people with addictions, understand these characters are meant to be complex, and learn to grasp the concept of nuance + remorse + grief and fear causing people to make poor choices challenge: impossible

[ef-1]

burn your village | female rage playlist

[madou-dilou]

"Each unjust act, even committed for the sake of a just cause, carries its curse within." The Accursed Kings, 1956

[seance]

THE WITCHER: WILD HUNT INTRO MONOLOGUE

[myenterpriseisparked]

Okay I understand where people are coming from with the "emotional suppression in Vulcans is learned not genetic" talk re: "Charades" but, consider......... the emotional suppression is muscle memory, and the aliens took away the mental muscles that remembered how to do it. It's a crude metaphor on my part, but that was the way I saw it.

Also consider: it's a sci fi show using extremely high-concept bullcrap science on a weekly basis and maybe nitpicking it is a fruitless endeavor because none of it is going to make sense otherwise and enjoying the ride for what it is is a much more enjoyable way to engage with this franchise. Sometimes you need to shrug and let dumb things happen and laugh.

[bellamer]

Me when I track down everyone who's even made a slightly anti black comment about Hobie's Spiderverse design:

[gncrezan]

some old @chrysanthemumgames hermes-seph sketches!!! some of it is established-relationship daydreaming but also a peek at my dark and twisted mind (sprawling intricate spidey au)

[creekfiend]

Whenever antivaxxers talk about how getting the Actual Disease is better for your immune system i think about how I was born just a little too early for the chicken pox vaccine and so I got Actual Chicken Pox and 20 years later a horrible case of shingles gave me a debilitating post viral condition from which I shall never recover

BUT VACCINES RIGHT. THATS DEFINITELY THE ISSUE

Sometimes people talk about vaccine harm and cite the very issues that I have and live with every day, issues I am very sympathetic to. And I think to myself. Vaccine harm isn't fucking contagious, you cowardly turnip

[horseshoemybeloved]

Why does non lesbians sapphic art always look like this

Why is it always

“ oh uh… um woman ❤️ wow I love, I uh I Love women…🥺….. wow I love queer sapphic wlws all they do is sit in meadows and play with each others hair…. Nothing eecky and gross like hairy stinky lesbo secc 🤢…. Just dainty small white women being dainty and small and feminine and so wlw sapphic 🥺🥺🥺”

Or

“ this is my MEAN and EVIL SCARY ASS LESBO OC who is SCARY omg STEP ON ME MOMMY she is such a BITCH who is also a MURDER who MURDERS MEN bcus she’s EVIL SCARY LESBO xoxo I love lesbians!!”

[sadiewayne]

i love tuning into tiktok to be bombarded with read by ai batfam/superbat posts and going "i've seen that one on hellsite"

idk when they changed from reddit to tumblr but they cite their sources better than james somerton and at least it's about my blorbos