#i did like 7 tries... cuz i was like: okay this one sounds good (i listen to it a few times. nope. could be better)

[aria0fgold]

IM FINALLY DONE! Freed from editing jail! Now I can finally sleep bro...

[mentally-gone002]

keep him safe

summary: y/n brings spencer to her apartment after noticing him acting differently. 

warnings: mentions of drugs, addiction (i think), blood, guns

a/n: this takes place a few weeks after S3 Ep12 (3rd life) where that kid is killed in front of spencer… and yeah!!! also i apologize cuz i don’t know what addiction is like so hence idk how to write it but i tried… pls enjoy🤓

————————————————————————

7:33 pm

outside the building housing the BAU office it was dark and quiet, only filled with the sound of the few cars that passed and loud chirping of cicadas. it was peaceful compared to the past case that only ended hours before this. 

everyone on the BAU team filed into the building to settled into their desks and get a few files of work completed before they went home to repeat the process the next day. some finished their work quicker; the some was hotch, prentis, rossi, jj and garcia. they all left with quick and tired goodbyes to the remaining members of the team until the only tree left were y/n and spencer and morgan. 

when morgan did leave he shot a suggestive look at the two youngest agents. “have fun tonight you two.” he smirked. y/n rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything. 

spencer was working slow for once, his eyes not taking in all the words of the page at the quick rate they usually do. his fingers tapped at his desk and made the pen in his dominant hand flip and twist. he was fidgeting more than he usually did. 

y/n noticed this of course. because she was just one bullpen away from him and because they were close friends… and she was a profiler. she knew when something was picking his brain, good or bad. he had been like this for a few weeks and today was the day she would step in. because she knew spencer. he wouldn’t reach out until he was too far into a hole he had dug for himself.

she watched him for half an hour in between work until she swiveled in her seat, turning it until her legs were free from beneath the desk. she stood up and walked around to his desk. 

“knock, knock.” she interrupted the silence with an accompanying wrap of her knuckles against his desk. she didn’t want to startle him, as he seemed to be on edge already. “you doing alright with that?” the question she asked was gentle while she leaned her hip against the desks edge and stared down at the brown haired man as he stared back. 

he shrugged. “i can’t really focus on it.” spencer confessed with a tired voice. his eyes had early signs of bruising underneath them that she caught onto before they disappeared behind his thin fingers that pressed into the corners of his eyes in exhaustion. 

a sigh flowed from her nose. she dropped her head to the side and her cheek smushed against her shoulder. “you okay?” she was concerned for him; he’d been quieter than usual on the way home. 

spencer nodded. “yeah, yeah. i’m okay, just- just can’t focus.” he told her as he slumped back into his chair. his pen was abandoned on the open file on the table. he stared blankly at the case file, almost in horror. 

she looked with him at the papers with the inside of her cheek held between her teeth, thinking to herself prior to flipping the file closed. spencer sat up a little with his mouth opening but she shushed him. “you can work on it tomorrow, okay? we’re gonna go home.” y/n said to him with a tone that told spencer not to fight her in this. 

“you said ‘we’ and ‘home’ in the same sentence. i don’t understand.” spencer followed her with his brown eyes, spinning himself in his chair to keep them on her as y/n walked back to her desk, switching off her lamp and grabbing her purse. 

she looked at him over her computer, turning it off with the almost unheard click of a button. “you’re gonna stay with me tonight.” she answered him simply. 

he furrowed his brows. “why?” 

“because i don’t trust you to be alone tonight.” 

spencer swallowed thickly with how her eyes bore into his own. he could have, no, should have known that y/n would have caught onto his behavior. 

a case from weeks ago had taken a toll on him. seeing a kid shot in front of his eyes after he tried everything he could to convince jack, the father of lindsay who was kidnapped, not to shoot the teen holding her captive. the image scarred him; how the bullet exploded the boys head from the close range, how the blood splattered on the walls, and how he stood there in shock because he didn’t know what to do. 

“i’m okay.” he swore to her. 

she pursed her lips as she walked back to his desk. “don’t fight me on this,” her voice was low in a whisper. “i want to help you, spencer.” she reached down to place her hand on the back of his where it rested on the desk. 

spencer swallowed thickly once more before he sighed, looking away. “okay.” when her hand retracted away from his, he stood up and put his bag over his shoulder. 

y/n smiled at him and started walking with spencer on her heels out of the glass doors of the BAU office, into the elevator and to her car. 

9:07 pm

y/n smiled as she unlocked the door to her apartment and walked inside with her hand on the nob until spencer was all the way inside. 

he’d been in her apartment multiple times which meant there was no awkward moments as he took off his shoes and hung his bag on the rack beside the door. 

“are you hungry?” she asked him as she entered her small kitchen and he went to sit at the island. 

“i’m alright… just tired.” he told her with his elbows leaning on the counter. he blinked slowly. 

“okay.” she looked him over with sad eyes. “spencer?” he looked up at her at the utter of his name. “if there’s something wrong you can talk to me.” 

her statement had him nodding with his head lowered and his eyes closed. 

she was the one person he actually told about his addiction problem that had taken him over almost few months ago, and she’d helped him stop. but now he had the urge to use again, and that’s why she brought him home with her. that was why. 

y/n padded out from behind the kitchen island to spencer and her arms went around his middle. her chest was against his curved back from his posture from leaning over the counter a bit and she rested her cheek on his shoulder blade. he was warm through his clothes and his heartbeat was loud, but slow in y/n’s ear.

“thank you.” the words were whispered by spencer. 

“you’re welcome.” y/n whispered back to him. her thumb on one hand slowly trailed up and down where it was against the front of his waist, almost the middle of his abdomen. “i just want you to be safe.” 

“i know.” he breathed heavily due to how her touch was so kind and soft, unlike their job. 

a comfortable silence settled over y/n’s apartment as they stayed where they were at the kitchen island. spencer was in the verge of sleep from how at ease he was, and not a single image of the long past case was in his head, until she pulled away, then it all came rushing back to him. but he wasn’t going to tell her. there was a part of him that knew she knew. 

she always knew. 

“cmon, it’s late.” y/n ran a hand down his back as she stepped away from the proximity, straying to go towards her bedroom. 

spencer stared after her and decided to follow once she disappeared from his sight through the door separating her own space from the open concept of her apartment. 

her bedroom was homy. soft colors made up her bed, curtains and walls, while her dresser and nightstands were a darker shade. spencer liked it. 

“you remember where your clothes are right?” she called from where she stood in front of her bathroom mirror. 

“yeah.” spencer answered. his socked feet carried him to her dresser. the top right drawer was his. it had a set of pajamas and work clothes in it. 

it was almost like spencer and y/n were in a relationship. they had the details of one. with the clothes of the other at each of their houses, the secret looks they passed, some what harmless flirting. they were very close. so close that almost all of their coworkers were waiting for the day they finally got together; they’ve been waiting for three years. 

spencer quickly changed out of his work clothes and into pajamas before slipping into y/n’s bed. he was going to go sleep on her couch but that would only result in her dragging him back to her room. he laid in his left side, facing her empty space with eyes on her pillow u til she joined him, almost coming nose to nose with him. 

“i’m glad you didn’t go to the couch.” she told him. 

his mouth tugged up in the corners. “i decided against it. i knew you’d just drag me back here.” he said it through a yawn. 

“you know me too well.” she hummed. 

“i do.” 

silence. 

“thank you, again.” spencer muttered. 

y/n nodded against her pillow. “it’s my job to look out for people. you just happen to be the most important people i do that for.” 

spencer nodded slowly at her words, smiling softly again. he absentmindedly fidgeted with the top of her comforter, twisting and pulling at the seam between his fingers anxiously. he was at ease with her, but that feeling in his body kept flashing over him. the part of him that wanted to use dilaudid kept resurfacing. 

y/n frowned. “hey,” her hand snaked out from under the comforter to brush through his soft hair, “where’d you go?” she searched his eyes with her own for the previously smiling spencer. he must have gone away for now. 

spencer shrugged with a shaky inhale. “i don’t know…” he blinked his eyes closed, hard. it’s what he did when he wanted to keep himself from crying. he sniffled a little, still toying with the seam of the comforter. 

y/n’s heart ached for him. she’d seen a lot of things that made her feel many different ways, but seeing spencer like this made her want to cry. 

spencer opened his eyes and looked at her. they were glossed over, creating an almost pretty sheen over the amber-brown color. the tear that slipped from one of his eyes made her move the hand she had in his hair to wipe it away. “i almost started using again…” his voice was quivering. “i just don’t want to see that dead kid anymore.”

y/n moved closer to his body under the covers. her hand rested on the side of his face, thumb drawing a gentle line back and forth over his cheekbone. “i know you don’t, babe.” she whispered. “what can i do for you?” 

spencer shrugged immediately after your question registered with him. “i just need distractions.” 

she nodded subtly. her hands retracted from his face as she rolled over to grab a book off her nightstand. “can i read to you?” 

spencer was quick to nod prior to moving closer to her. his arms were acting as a pillow for his head as he remained laying on his side, only inches away from her as she opened her book. 

she started reading, which made spencer’s mind go blank as he listened. he liked how slow she was with the words, taking her time. sometimes she’d stutter, or ask him how to pronounce something. it was a nice change from how he read. 

y/n paused her reading to take a quick glance down at spencer, seeing how he had curled into himself and was now breathing steadily with a few soft snores mixed in. she smiled to herself and closed the book, putting it back on her nightstand and switched off the light.

[fantasylandloser]

Attention

warnings: mention of not having food, kissing, suggestive, glenn being a gossip, if there are more let me know

a/n- there might be a part two for *whispers* smut

(update pt. 2)

************

“Where’d ya get this?” Daryl asks, snapping the strap of your bra. It’s the girliest thing he’s ever seen you wear. He imagined you must have liked little frilly bras before the infection.

“Found it.” Is your simple answer. He grunts, barely an acknowledgment. “Same for all this?” He questions nodding his head towards the assortment of lip gloss and hair products and girly shit that he didn’t know the name of. 

“Yep.” Another grunt. 

“Sounds like a waste of a run.” He judges, but it doesn’t bother you, you know how surly he can be. 

“We didn’t go for it, we stumbled across it.” You explain but you’re barely paying attention to him, you’re too busy looking in the mirror trying to make yourself as pretty as possible. More like how you looked before all this started. 

“We?” Daryl asks, barely able to keep your attention.

“Me, Maggie and Michionne.” You answer as you fuss over your hair. Daryl grunts again and you cut your eyes at him. 

“Will you stop that? If you have something to say just say it.” You wait for him to tell you how stupid you look trying to pretty yourself up in the middle of the fucking apocalypse, in a prison at that. 

“It’s just not like you, s’all.” 

‘“It used to be,” You pause taking a deep breath, before running your fingers through your hair. “Before the world got blown to shit, I used to love this, had it down to a science. Now I can barely remember how I kept up with all of it.” 

“You don’t need it.” Daryl tells you. “All this for that guy?” He knows better, but he asks anyway. His curiosity had been peaked ever since you started disappearing at odd hours of the day only to reappear with him. You also hadn’t seemed like you were interested in making any connection outside of your friendship with Daryl and the others you were at the farm with.

At a certain point you’d been his shadow basically, damn near mirroring everything he did, until you ditched him for some douchebag you hardly knew. It went from you being at his side practically 24/7 to it taking up to an hour for him to find you. 

You roll your eyes at him. “It’s for me. And you know his name.” 

“Yeah well I don’t think Mark would like it if he knew you were prancin’ around in this frilly shit in front of me.” You scoff trying not to laugh at him saying his name in such contempt.

“You can leave if you want.” He doesn’t. “ Mark and I aren’t even together.”

“Fooled me.” He tells you gruffly. He tries not to feel too disappointed when you start to shimmy into your pants, the tightest pair you own, or look at the curve of your ass when they get stuck under your thighs momentarily. 

‘“Might be time to trade those.” He says gesturing to the jeans that just barely fit you but make you look so, so good. 

“Maybe.” You agree. “None of my damn pants fit right anymore.” You complain. Daryl knew what you meant but couldn’t help thinking they fit just right. 

“It’s cuz’ we actually have food to eat now. Ain’t that a good thing?” He reminds you and you can’t help the feeling of gratitude for all you have now.

“Yeah. The best thing.” 

After you throw your shirt over your head you start to speak again. “Okay do I look like a woman again?” You ask, doing a quick spin for Daryl. His heart picks up when you look back at him, seeming to want his approval. 

“You never stopped lookin’ like one, last I checked.” You give him a look of indignation, before sighing. Wrong Answer.

********

“Why didn’t you just tell her?” Glenn asked.

“Cuz’ it wasn’t for me. It’s for him.” Daryl nodded down at Mark, who was twiddling his thumbs waiting for you. 

“Dude, the only reason she’s even paying attention to him is because you’re practically a nun.” Glenn says before pausing. “That’s what Maggie told me anyway.” If she were standing beside him she’d hit him upside his head for never being able to keep a secret. 

“Maggie told you what now?” 

Glenn sighs knowing that gossiping is going to come back to bite him in the ass. He does it anyway because he can’t keep a secret to save his life. 

“Yeah man, Maggie told me that the woman basically walks around you half naked and you don’t want her. I also saw the shit they came back with so if you ignored her in that, then I’d say you’ve given her a pretty good reason to believe you aren’t interested.” Glenn glances over at Daryl, seeing the look of confusion.

“I didn’t ignore her.” Daryl says sharply. “I didn’t know it was some sorta’ test.” He huffs, not liking that his friend knew all this and he was left in the dark, about you of all things.

“It’s not a test bro, she was trying to get your attention. I mean in my opinion I think she should come right out and say it, that’s what Maggie did but maybe she doesn’t know how to at this point.”

“Maggie dragged your ass through the mud before the two of you got together. That’s how I remember it, walker bait.” Daryl smiles a bit knowing you told him that, but you’re not as much of a gossip as Glenn.

“Shut up, man.”

When you finally get to the bonfire, Daryl sees the moment Mark lays eyes on you, but he whistles to catch your attention before you can go over to him. 

“Glenn needs a break , you wanna fill in for ‘em?” Glenn makes a noise of amusement at his obvious lie, becoming even more amused when you scrunch your face up but then agreeing anyway. 

You’re in the guard tower for ten minutes before Daryl says something, instead of the utter silence. “Glenn told me something..” He starts. He hears you mutter a ‘fuck’ under your breath knowing that he wasn’t good at keeping a thing to himself and Maggie kept nothing from him.

“That’s never good.”

“Not for anyone that shares secrets with him.” You hum in agreement. 

“So what did he tell you?” You ask, not wanting to draw out the conversation. 

“How many secrets of yours does he know?” He asks you, his eyebrow drawn up and you don’t hear it but he has to bite back the jealousy. 

“Between him and Maggie, way too many.” You admit. Daryl grunts, displeased that you share things with them that you don’t with him. He gets it. Doesn’t mean he has to like it. 

“If you have something to say to me I think you should say it.” Neither of you are looking at each other, instead you’re both scanning the perimeter. You wanted to curse Glenn for putting you in the predicament where you might have to say something you just wanted to be. 

When you remain silent. He pushes again, he just wants to hear it from you. “It’s not gonna be on me if you don’t say anything.” You inhale a deep breath.

“You know how I feel about you, Dixon.” Not enough. 

“I don’t.” He counters. 

“You do.” You huff and he watches you out of the corner of his eye, sees the slight flame in your cheeks and wonders if it's from embarrassment or anger. You just might be as bad as this as he is. It’s cute.

“I think I’ve made it pretty clear.” You add much to Daryl’s shock. So much so, that he drops his gun just to look at you better. 

“How do you figure that?” You give him a pointed look and he grins in his realization. “I thought you just liked the attention.” You scoff at his words. 

“Your attention, dumbass. You don’t see me running around in my underwear in front of anyone else.”And you are specific to only his attention. The way he looks at you inspires a feeling in you that hasn’t been accomplished by any other man. 

“Well you don’t needa be so mad about it.” You exhale because you are mad and you’re not entirely sure why. 

“If you don’t want me just say that. I don’t see any reason-” You’re cut off by a rough grab of the front of your shirt. He kisses you, it’s quick, somehow deep, then it’s over. 

“Y’er beautiful. With or without the extra shit. You understand me?” It takes you a moment to realize he’s answering your earlier question. You nod, slightly flustered, your thoughts and words failing you. 

“Good. Go tell Glenn he can come back.”

[kittyplanchett3]

In a group setting how would someone know if brainwashing play was bad or not? How can you tell if the brainwashing play is abusive or unsafe?

I've been waiting to answer this one cuz it's taken me awhile to type it up. This is a long one. cw: mentions of abuse/manipulation in the context of coersive control/coersive persuasion and both kinky and abusive brainwashing

The use of the word simulate below (in regards to brainwashing) is intentional as there is no way to truly brainwash someone that doesn't involve abusive coersive control and the non-consentual manipulation/subversion of someones core values and boundaries in ways that aren't sexy or fun. Actual (non-kinky/real) brainwashing and consentual kink are incompatible. With that said, you can definitely simulate brainwashing safety in kink scenes. Hopefully what I wrote out will help you figure out where things land <3

The answer:

As y'all know I was in a cult that did involve legitimate abusive mind control techniques that larger cults often use and people frequently ask me the difference between consensual brainwashing/mind control in safe & consensual hypno fantasies/scenes vs abusive brainwashing/mind control/persuasive coercion in abusive dynamics & cults. After experiencing both, I would say the best way to tell is by comparing your situation with scenarios that I've listed below. Obviously this can vary based on the type of play you are engaging in but if you find a few things to be true, I would def be careful.

- you might actually be in an abusive situation if you can't ever hit pause during play, safeword, or discuss the nature of your play with your tist outside of scenes and if there was never discussion about this aspect of the dynamic before engaging in that play. if you tist makes you feel bad about asserting a limit or boundary or changes how they show you attention/communication/shame to punish you for asserting yourself or challenging them esp out of scenes without any negotiation/discussion that's ofc a red flag.

in situations that involve cult like abusive brainwashing, the work rly begins once you have reached a limit so the person would want to bring you to a breaking point, then keep you there and actively surpass it. if this doesn't sound fun, it's not. if it sounds fun, you probably aren't realizing this usually involves limits you have that you cannot sexualize. a good chunk of abusive brainwashing will focus on things you have no interest in doing and that you don't find sexy or fun. in extreme situations this could include things that are disfiguring, or that could ruin or risk your or someone else's life.

- someone assuming you are okay with anything or making you feel like you should be in order to be a good sub is never a good thing when you consider what anything could mean to some people. i know a lot of people enjoy being like "I have no limits" but most people have a list of limits if you bring up situations like bodily disfigurement, theft of money or things that could put their housing/freedom/life at risk...it's important to remember these things don't matter to someone who doesn't care about hurting you.

- you might actually be in an abusive situation if there is no room to challenge or disagree with your tist in and especially out of scenes. emphasis on this if this aspect of the dynamic was never negotiated or talked about before. even in 24/7 dynamics, these things are generally discussed. if your tist expects complete obedience from day one and there has never been space to talk about what that means or your limits/goals etc thats generally not a great sign. if your tist tries to tell you that's what brainwashing entails, i would run cuz they aren't completely lying but that also means your safety, goals and happiness won't matter to them. if you say you are struggling with an aspect of the play and they push it harder, that can be hot in some dynamics but also that's kind of a red flag if they push harder on those things without first sitting you down to ask you about what you mean that you are struggling with a particular thing.

- in abusive dynamics/cults that use persuasive coercion, your goals/boundaries/limits etc don't actually matter and often times these things will be actively weaponized and used against you to break you. if a dominant is constantly testing limits/boundaries without discussion/negotiation or is actively violating your hard limits/boundaries.

- if your tist ONLY seems interested in the things you have clearly stated that don't want to do/have no interest in exploring/explaining things you normally consent to when you aren't in the mood to engage with those things...that's such a fucking red flag. with actual brainwashing your goal for the play doesn't actually matter and your tist is likely to start pushing you towards something you aren't actually that interested in, often using your disinterest/push back as an example of why you haven't reached the actual goal you are attempting to attain. self sacrifice is a theme in abusive brainwashing but you don't get a choice about what parts are sacrificed...which can be hot in theory until you realize you don't get any say or input and the control extends to all of your other relationships. this might start off looking like limit testing disguised as a joke.

**note: limit testing can start out seeming harmless but essentially that's only to groom you to be comfortable with having your limits/boundaries tested in bigger ways. this might look like a dominant telling you to try to eat a food you don't want to try or even a dominant buying you something you told them you didn't want them to buy you. some things they push you to do may seem ultimately beneficial as well which can make this confusing if it's happening at it may not seem as much of a red flag in the moment especially if some of the things they are pushing end up being good experiences. the problem is how this changes over time and often leads to them testing you in ways that aren't at all fun or beneficial. the reason I mentioned gifts is buying you something that you told them not to buy you/sending you money you told them not to send you is often a way to test how you respond to control/limits because it can be written off as a good faith judgment mistake/they can play it off like they didn't have bad intentions if confronted. 

- in a healthy scene or dynamic where mind control/brainwashing is simulated either in a scene or over time ultimately the sub will still always be in control and that loss of control will be simulated safely. hard limits will still be respected and there is always space made to negotiate or pause/stop a scene. the focus will be on something the sub ultimately has set as a goal/has agreed upon. in abusive situations what a sub wants/their goals don't matter, their limits don't matter, their feelings won't matter, and their safety won't matter. in an abusive situation, a lot of play slowly turns from something that aligns with the subs goals to something that aligns with the dominants goals/turns into straight up abuse/assault/sa.

- if more than one kinky friend approaches you concerned about how you changed or the safety of your play, huge red flag. when you are being brainwashed in an abusive situation everything is so normalized that it's hard to see the abuse. trust your besties. trust your other partners. trust the people who have nothing to gain from confronting you about their concerns.

With all of that said, with actual abusive brainwashing, it's all about overhauling your limits and boundaries and getting you comfortable being very uncomfortable all the time. In any brainwashing scene, you are likely to feel overwhelmed, destabilized, unsafe, afraid etc but those are feelings people often want to feel in a kink scene so it can be hard to put your finger on when things might be crossing a line. I hope this helps the anon/someone gain some clarity.

When I was in the cult I was in, I was convinced over time that I needed to be more comfortable being uncomfortable and that my limits were self-limiting, that the person abusing me knew my limits better than I did, and that I should default to him for what those limits are. This can be hot in theory, but I promise you the reality is super unsexy when the person who is doing this doesn't actually care about your life, safety, relationships, goals, or well-being.

[d3adp00ls]

skateboards, bruises, and spiders

Summary: While Peter is supposed to be teaching you how to skateboard you notice a new bruise on his face leading you to confront him about it (the summary sucks I know i couldn't think of a good one)

Warnings: mentions of an attempt of robbing an old lady, Peter has a bruise (but that's normal for him), honestly there aren't any real warnings this was just smth I put together cuz I was bored but it's just fluffy.

Word count: it’s short. But you can count and tell me if you want ☺️☺️

A/N: I need to make a new masterlist later but I'm too lazy to do it rn but here's this fic while we can all pretend I definitely didn't forget or give up on my other series 🤭🤭🤭. ALSO, this could be seen as a platonic type of thing but in my mind, they both like each other but won't say anything (yet)

........

A bunch screaming, crying, and laughing that's all you could hear while you waited for your best friend who was supposed to be here over 10 minutes ago, Peter told you he wanted to hang out as much as possible this summer so when you brought up the fact that you were trying to learn how to skate he right away told you he would help teach you and you agreed to it embarrassingly fast though.  Your patience was wearing thin and you had sent a few texts to Peter none of which he responded to or even saw. You rub your face and let out a sigh as you press his contact and call him and let it ring.

“Hello?”

“Peter! Hey, it's Y/n you know? Your friend? The one you were supposed to meet up with at the park over 15 minutes ago? Are you still coming or what man?”

You hear him curse on the other side of the phone and it causes your jaw to clench thinking he forgot about you.

“If you forgot it's fine we can do it some other ti-”

You hear shuffling on the other end before he cuts you off.

“No! I mean no I didn't forget- I mean I kind of forgot- what I mean is I just lost track of time but I'm on my way right now.”

You stay quiet for a moment as you listen to him move around through the phone You swear you hear you hear cop sirens that sound way too close to be outside his room but you choose to ignore it  before you lean back on the bench and let your skateboard rest on your lap

“Alright, I’m by that playground near the bathrooms and the vegan food place,” you say into the phone and you hear him hum in response before you hang up.

........

It took Peter about 7 minutes to finally get to you and when he did he realized he forgot his skateboard so you both had to walk back to his aunt's apartment to get it, now you were both back at the park. You were watching him as he explained how to maintain balance while you push yourself and blah blah blah, you were just nodding your head pretending to listen while you stared at the new bruise below his eye that definitely wasn't there the last time you saw him

“Okay so then you’re gonna push like- Y/n/n? Y/n? Are you even listening to me?”

You blink a few times trying to think of what he was saying to you.

“Um…” Peter sighs before you can even come up with an excuse.

“Y/n, you asked for my help but you're not even paying attention, were you even listening at all-”

“How’d you get that bruise?” You cut him off

Peter's eyes go wide for a moment before he looks down at his foot playing with the skateboard in front of him.

“Are you trying to change the subject?”

“No…I just wanted to know,” You scratch the back of your neck as you look around you “I mean you didn't have it the last time I saw you and I'm just curious.”

You hear Peter hum, “I fell off my skateboard the other day.”

Now it was your turn to hum, “Oh really? That's weird…cause I've had that same kind of bruise before…and it was when someone punched me…”

“Someone punched you-” “Not recently, and plus that's not the point, Peter, that was a long time ago, but someone definitely punched you recently.”

You watch him scratch his neck as he tries to think of an excuse before he sighs.

“No one punched me I just ran into a pole-” “You're a horrible liar Parker, Who punched you? Was it Flash again? I thought you guys were friends now… Or was it that one kid-” “It doesn't matter Y/n-” “It does matter, you’re hurt-” “I'm fine” “But you’re bruised-” “It doesn't even hurt anymore-” “Okay but it did at some point.”

He stares at you in bewilderment at how you wouldn't drop this conversation and how you were actually worried about him.

“Y/n, I’m fine I swear, some guy was trying to rob this old lady and jumped in and stopped him, he was able to land a hit on my face before I could get him on the ground though.” He says with a shrug.

You sigh and shake your head.

“You could've just told me that instead of lying,” “Yeah I know but it was fun seeing you all worried about me.” He nudges you with his arm before laughing when you glare at him

“I wasn't ‘all worried’ about you I just wanted to know whether or not it had something to do with the police I heard through the phone early.” After you say this you can see him tense and his eyes widen.

“What police?” “Peter don't play dumb when we were on the call I literally heard police sirens going off in the background, at first I thought maybe it was just from outside but then I realize they were too loud and that you were in fact near them,” “I don't remember hearing any police sirens when I was on the phone with you-” “Okay peter whatever you say man, but the way you're all tensed up and sweating it just proves my point more and more.” “And what point is that?” You smile when he asks you that and you can see his brows furrow when you lean closer to him so you could whisper to him, “That you’re Spider-man.”

Peter jumps back his eyes wide and his mouth agape as he stares at you as if you had just told him Victoria’s Secret, “Spider-man?!” he shouts but when you both notice people looking toward you he calms down slightly and leans back in “Spider-man? That’s crazy- how could I- no way- I'm not him- he's not me- that's a crazy idea-” You only stare at him with a raised brow as he continues to rant about how he could never be the vigilante that swings around new york city every day.

Eventually, you get bored of listening to him try to deny his alter ego and you pick up your own skateboard and start to walk away.

“-And plus if I was Spider-Man- hey wait where are you going?”

“We came here to skate Parker, not to talk about your secret double life that, by the way, is definitely real, and as much as I would love to stuff in your face how I've figured you out I also wanna learn how to do tricks on this thing.” You lift your skateboard up before letting it drop on the ground and getting on it and skating away.

“Hey wait!” Peter quickly got on his before trying to catch up with you.

“When did you even learn to skate!?”

...…..

A/n: Bro ik it’s short like I said 😒 I was just bored and made this 🤭🤭🤭but yo I think I did good I told my friend I would probably finished at 3am it’s only 1 so I’m good now. OH ALSO MY REQUEST ARE OPEN (but specifically for PETER PARKER ONLY!!!) SO PLEASE SEND IN SMTH IM BORED AND ITS ONLY 1AM

(Also please leave a like if you enjoyed and if you’re feeling ever so generous a reblog as well 🫶🏾🫶🏾)

[son1c]

falling stars bonus chapter cuz it's been on my mind all day

falling stars fic masterpost

Sonic spent the first 5 seconds after he woke up blissfully unaware that anything was wrong. When 6 seconds rolled around, however, he started to get the feeling that maybe something was a little weird about his current situation. It was the pillow that gave it away–the thing was just too darn fluffy. It was unnatural. And by the time 7 seconds passed, he cracked his eyes open, and was greeted by a familiar room that did nothing but confirm his suspicions.

It was the hospital room from before. The simple fact that he recognized it was part of the problem. Because he had spent all of yesterday not recognizing anything, and he was kind of hoping it was just a bad dream. So, now that he had woken up and wasn’t magically transported to a world where he didn’t have amnesia… 

Well, it was a little undeniable.

But whatever. He could put that on the back burner for now, because there was one more thing that was bugging him. And this one was a bit more urgent than the whole “I can’t remember who I am” thing. And it was that, aside from himself, the room was empty.

He might have a faulty memory, but if there was one thing he was positive about, it was that he hadn’t been alone when he’d fallen asleep this morning.

So that begged the question: where was Stripes?

With a not unsubstantial amount of effort, Sonic sat up. Then, he noticed a pair of gloves folded neatly at the bottom of the bed. They were light blue, and sitting within arm’s reach on top of the thin sheet he was covered with. Wait, he didn’t remember crawling under the covers–

Sonic shook his head. Just add it to the list of things he didn’t remember, and move on, he thought.

After he grabbed the gloves, he put them on. The light blue felt… different… but it was nice to cover up some of the bandages, at least. So, he didn’t mind too much.

His broken leg ached horribly, so he tried to be as mindful of it as possible when he scooched forward. He got as far as the bottom end of the bed before stopping, both of his legs now hanging down over the edge. From there, he leaned forward, peeking around the corner and toward the door. It was still closed. Okay. He looked the other way, toward the window. It was still open. Hmm.

With a frown, Sonic sat back. He thought about how, unlike himself, Shadow was able to move around without any issues. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. Even with all the craziness earlier, Sonic had still noticed the other hedgehog’s slight limp. But still, he was in way better shape than Sonic was currently. So, if he wanted to…

If he wanted to…

Sonic stared out the open window.

A slight rattling noise suddenly caught his attention. The sound was coming from above, and when Sonic looked up, he saw the bolts holding the air vent to the wall slowly becoming unscrewed. Before the metal cover could fall to the floor, however, a gloved hand reached out and snatched it. And then Shadow’s head appeared from inside of the vent, and he looked down at Sonic.

“Oh,” Shadow said. “You’re awake.”

Sonic couldn’t help but grin. “That’s a pretty cool entrance, Stripes.”

Shadow dropped down from the vent. It was only after propping the metal cover up against the wall that he turned back around to face Sonic and said, “The door didn’t seem like a good idea.”

Sonic snorted. “Still cool,” he said. Whatever worries had been coiling in his stomach before were gone now. He was wondering, though… “What made you wanna go all Mission Impossible?”

Shadow glanced at Sonic’s leg. “I was looking for something to help with that,” he said, “that I couldn’t find in here. Those bandages won’t hold up as a support for long. But this should.” He held out something to Sonic, a black brace suited for a Mobian-sized leg.

Sonic started to get excited. As grateful as he was that Shadow had been carrying him around up until this point, he definitely didn’t want to be a hedgehog-shaped tote bag forever. “Good thinking,” he said.

After slipping the brace onto his leg with only a moderate amount of pain, Sonic felt way better about their situation. He hadn’t realized just how miserable having a broken leg was making him until this very moment. Really, it almost made his memory problems seem like a nonissue by comparison.

“How does that feel?” Shadow asked.

“It feels like I could run a marathon,” Sonic replied.

Shadow frowned. “Don’t push your luck, Blue.”

Holding up his hands, Sonic said, “Just kidding. This thing would probably only be good for a half marathon, anyway.”

Shadow’s frown deepened, the joke totally flying over his head. But Sonic didn’t mind. He was just happy to have some of his freedom of motion back. With a sparkle in his eyes, Sonic asked, “Will you spot me? I wanna try to stand.”

Shadow started to say, “This is no time to be reckless,” but was cut off mid sentence by Sonic.

“Pleeeaaase?”

Scowling, Shadow averted his eyes from Sonic’s puppy dog face. “It’s your decision,” Shadow said, knowing that if he didn’t agree, Sonic would probably just do it anyway. “Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Sonic beamed when Shadow held out his hand. He took it eagerly, pulling himself up onto his feet as quickly as he dared. He put most of his weight onto his good leg, so the twinge in his bad one was kept to a minimum.

“Satisfied?” Shadow asked.

But Sonic wasn’t. Not yet. He dared to take a step forward, and the brace clacked against the hard linoleum floor when he did so. Now all he had to do was put his weight on it, and he would’ve taken his first real step since waking up in that crater yesterday. 

Sonic knew it was going to hurt. But he didn’t care, and after he took that one, small, painful step, all he could do was beam.

“Yeah,” Sonic said, giving Shadow’s hand a squeeze. “Now I am. Thanks.”

[cornfields-td-nonsense]

how long does harpers crush on charlie lasts cuz if it's longer than 3 eps then. girl.... get some respect

Alright so in a rough timeline of events:

Episodes 1-3: Harper gets thrown onto Team Freakazoid after one of the contestants dropped out at the last minute. She doesn’t really get on with anyone, except Charlie. They start to bond, mostly by making snide remarks about Chris and the challenges to make the other laugh, or Charlie infodumping about history nerdy stuff and Harper listening. They’re really hitting it off as friends.

Episodes 4-7: Harper’s beginning to crush on him. He seems unaware. It’s all set up like a “pining x oblivious” friends-to-lovers speedrun. Harper talks about Charlie in the confessional, he acknowledges that he thinks she’s really cool, other characters start to clock Harper’s crush.

Episode 7ish: There’s probably some couple-oriented challenge a la the Niagara Brawls challenge or the kissing dare in Pahkitew, and Harper and Charlie are right there in the forefront. Just to reeeeeally hammer it in. Anyway, afterwards she ends up asking him out and he says yes. (Cut to Charlie in the confessional: “This is… good. This is great! A girl who I think is cool, and funny, and I guess objectively attractive, is into me. This is a good thing. Of course it is. No-brainer. I’m happy about this!” He sounds more like he’s trying really hard to convince himself this is true.)

Episode 8ish: It all culminates here. They’re officially together and Charlie is having a teensy little crisis. Everything he’s heard from his family to his peers to the media he consumes tells him that this is something he should be happy about. So why the hell does everything suddenly feel worse? Harper picks up on the fact that something’s the matter, but doesn’t get a chance to ask him about it before the challenge starts.

Stuff happens, episode shenanigans ensue, but the two of them eventually end up alone together with no interruptions, to finally Have An Honest Conversation. An uncharacteristically embarrassed Charlie manages to explain that he doesn’t actually think he likes Harper like that, and maybe… he was just trying to convince himself that he liked anyone like that. He didn’t know if it was because he was too antisocial, or just didn’t have many people he got on with, but now he’s actually had the full experience of being In A Relationship with someone who he enjoys the company of, who likes him and by all accounts he likes too (even if it’s not the same way)… he’s realised that it’s always going to feel wrong somehow. Harper’s surprised, but tries to understand. She tells him it’s okay and to be fair they kind of rushed into things and would it be okay if they stayed friends? Because for what it’s worth she still enjoys his company and wants to be his friend.

Neither of them have had a best friend before. And once that’s sorted, they click way better as best friends than they did as a couple.

(Cut to Harper in the confessional: “Am I bummed that my first actual relationship lasted all of one day? Eh… kind of, I guess. But this? This is honestly way better.”)

And episodes 9ish onwards they remain friends and return to the same dynamic they had in the first three episodes and the rest is history.

[candy8448]

Sammer's kingdom piano cover

The rambles about this is in the description, but imma also put it here:

I have been playing piano for 4 years now

This took me two/three weeks to learn during the summer holiday and it felt great to be finally able to play it without thinking too much and just listening to the music, after a while though, i did get a bit tired of it so i didn't bother to learn the intro but i got really good at the actual song part!

I tried to record this 7 other times, this is the best one. I can play this all the way twice without a single mistake usually but its just the nerves of actually recording it that made me keep making mistakes and i just didn't have the will to keep recording

I felt so nervous that it felt like performing in front of real people, not my phone, i feel the nervous shake in my everything even though its just my phone

I found that the best way not to make mistakes is to just kinda zone out a tiny bit, or if you are gonna pay attention of be worried, worry about something else like does my shirt look weird in the video, somehow that took my mind off of it and made me make less mistakes

The first round sounds actually okay, it's the second round that was kinda a mess

Watching this back you can actually see my hands shaking and stiff cuz i had tried 7 other times beforehand

[knowlessman]

bnha I guess then? ep 5-7

ohey isn't that the tumbly sexlerguy of this show? with the scarf and the 5 o'clock? actually idk if he was in the poll or if drawfee just talked about him before, but he looks like one to me.

huh. he's got his shirt tucked in and all. not planning on hulking out tonight I guess. -- come to think of it tho, there hasn't been any talk so far of whether this "inheriting" of the Quirk is going to mean that All Might loses his power. -- …okay I guess this is him saying that here?

…"Itadakimasu" is translated as "I'm off!" here. I think I'm gonna have to accept that I'm never gonna know the full meaning of that one unless I put my entire ass into learning what's probably one of the harder languages to try to learn when starting from English. 'XD I should content myself with knowing about "natsukashiku."

This fucking guy again

This other fucking guy tho, Ida (Iida? Maybe the subs just misspelled it that time? idk). Cautiously starting to like him. Bit annoying, but annoying about being a decent guy.

it's the sexlerman doing his Kakuna cosplay. Forgot he did that. Maybe he's literally just Stein but less uncomfortable to watch, that'd be fun. -- Aizawa. When do we learn pink girl's name tho? The opening flashes the names by too fast.

ZUKO. IT'S ZUKO. HI ZUKO. Hope he gets some lines soon. -- literally googles just to check that he isn't voiced by dante basco bc that might be the only thing that would actually get me to watch a dub (I just like to read shows and not have to follow verbal convo I'm not here to argue about it) -- also Froppy (?) and birdman and that one guy who by reputation needs as few lines as possible and, uh, acid girl I think? and invisible girl. and, y'know, the rest

sounds like shithead's (not The Bad Shithead, the bad shithead we already know) VA is having fun, at least. sounds fucking terrifying

…eraser what. …am I not gonna wanna like this guy? I know just enough about what eraser head (the movie) is to know I don't wanna know any more about it -- pretty sure he's bullshitting about expulsion. unless it's gonna be laser navel here who gets expelled, cuz I've never seen nuffin about him before -- stg give this man a bucket hat and clogs and poof he's from a different show -- …gawd I hope nothing tempts me to continue bleach, I haven't heard anything good about the bits past that filler even tho it's aesthetically so much more my jam

Uraraka. …I read the entire Bionicle book series as a kid, I should be able to remember that just fine. … ':|

can't get the image of saitama with his head stuck in the ceiling out of his head

…ayup. no notes. next one.

"the person with the lowest total score will be expelled" meanwhile I don't think being fucking invisible makes you run any faster or throw any harder. the fuck's No-Hat-No-Clogs on about? -- absolute dickweed. also how in fuck did invisible girl beat deku? cheating? is she even able to make her clothes invisible, or is it a Violet Parr situation where it has to be a specific material?

I mean tbf you haven't tried powering up one toe at a time yet. running/skipping that way might look stupid as hell but it's better than blondie over there

"I'M DEKU!!!" 'XD -- I also love the exaggerated reaction shots in this, they're very good -- copernican…? googles nerd.

how I've never seen a gif of "I'M… COMING THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!" I'll never know

these oughta be good

okay this is cute -- facepalm nobody told me deku was a furry

…well that's conve - huh. Iida being the teammate will be interesting. (also is it gonna turn out that they're lying about it being randomized now? because this is some astonishing coincidence) -- interesting that they're literally playing rainbow six siege tho

awfully metallic for paper mache

…that's… huh. powerful moment for bakugo to just throw away like he's going to

aye, next one

haha kid bakugo walks like a rugrats character

why is zuko half-covered in ice for no reason? is that sposed to be his costume?

heh. he's not Saitama or Rock Lee. He's Karate Kid. (I saw like one or two episodes of Legion of Superheroes) His superpower is knowing what it's like to not have a Quirk. -- "I need a plan." runs off ah, yes. more time for thinking. hope he stops being relatable soon and actually comes up with a plan, tho. -- you don't need to beat Bakugo if you can get him lost tho. …maybe I'm underestimating him but I would be surprised if he bothered to memorize the layout worth a damn. -- I swear his VA is channeling a lot of mob boss for a high schooler 'XD

…Iida you're being weird. for the love of fuck please don't tell me you're gonna start listening to mr bonaparte up there

"he's just standing there… cackling like an idiot"

huh. we did learn why he's got bigass grenades on his hands. -- sidenote: …when I was a kid I wrote up superpowers that my stuffed animals had. one of them was literally this. …I gotta get myself to fucking write more. (didn't write any actual stories, tho. also obv I didn't think of the gun bit) -- and that's how deku got his costume

aye. good shit. gonna stop for tonight

[mentally-gone002]

is it too early to love you? - final part (7)

(moodboard made by moi)

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7

summary: reader and spencer meet in the afternoon like they’d promised to play chess and get coffee. everything is prefect and comfortable, even as reader gets brave enough to do something she felt sorry for not doing sooner. 

a/n: gang… i don’t wanna end this one… but idk what i should do past this part😭😭😭 but if yall want more just request smth cuz im obsessed with how this turned out🤓 ALSO ty for all the love you’re given this series, ive had a blast writing this (literally destroyed my sleep schedule i made because i go back to school in like four days or some bullshit) and it’s rlly awesome being a writer that makes fun little things that ppl end up loving!!!! so big ty to all of yall who’ve been reading 

————————————————————————

was this too much?

i stared at myself in the mirror as i adjusted the collar of my sweater with my fingers. 

i’m just going to see my best friend, so why am i dressing like this is a date? and why am i so nervous. 

it’s a good nervous. the kind that had an entire rabble of butterflies fluttering around my stomach.

it wasn’t fancy, just a casual outfit that he’d definitely never seen me in before. i would wear this on a date though. on an occasion like this one.

i stepped away from my reflection. it was 11:30 and it wouldn’t take me longer than ten minutes to get to the coffee shop but i got my shoes on anyway. it doesn’t hurt to be early. 

i left my apartment in a giddy rush. my feet were louder on the stairs than usual due to my quick pace. 

one of my neighbors who was walking inside gave me an amused smile. “what’re you getting up to today?” she asked. 

i directed my eyes towards her. “i’m going to see a friend.” my lips were pinned in a smile. 

she grinned widely. “is it that boy who’s always coming over? the handsome tall one with brown hair?” 

“maybe.” i nodded. 

she gave me a knowing look. “oh honey, are you sure he’s just a friend?”

i tried to hide the flush over my cheeks. “i’m sure.” 

“okay.” she nodded slowly like she wasn’t convinced. “i’ll know when he’s more than that.” 

i rolled my eyes and left the building, deciding to walk instead of drive. maybe it’ll help my energy levels. 

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

i was cold by the time i got to the coffee shop. the autumn air was motionless apart from when cars would drive past me on the street, and the chill bit at my face and hands, even though i had them hidden in the sleeves of my sweater. it was bearable though. 

“welcome in!” 

the cheerful voice of a barista behind the counter mingled with the bell above the door and the chatter of customers placed across the establishment. it was warm inside and it smelled like coffee, for obvious reasons. 

“hey.” a familiar voice sounded behind me. i turned around to look at spencer while he closed the shop door behind himself. 

“hi.” i smiled. 

“have you been here long?” he wondered. 

i shook my head and freed my hands from my sleeves. “no. i got here a minute or two ago…” spencer’s hand on my face had me trailing off. his fingers moved some of my hair away from my eyes.

“did you walk?” his brows were pinched together, more so as i nodded. “it’s cold out.” 

i smiled. he’s too sweet. “i’m okay. it’s not that bad.” i promised him through the tone of my voice and the look i gave him through my lashes. 

he smiled softly with a nod. “good.” 

“we still have a chess game to go play, so you better not let the temperature get to you.” my hand reached out to gently clamp around his wrist so i could pull him after me into the short line so we could get our coffees and then walk to the park. 

“can i try yours?” i asked while walking down the sidewalk, outside again. i gestured to his coffee by tapping the side of it with my index finger. our arms brushed as we walked. 

spencer hummed a ‘yes’ as he handed off his cup to me. 

i excitedly took his cup and sipped from it, cautiously because i’ve heard morgan say that it would put him in a coma if he had more than a sip of it after mixing up an order. this happened years ago but morgan still talks about it.

he was right because when the drink hit my tongue i closed my eyes, pulling a face at how sweet it was. “jesus!”

spencer’s sweet laughter swirled inside my head. he gently took his cup back. “too sweet?” 

i nodded quickly. “yeah. how do you drink that everyday?” i sipped my own coffee to try and get rid of the sugar that still lingered on my tongue. 

when we kissed he tasted like that.

he shrugged. “i don’t know, I’m just used to it i guess.”

our arms brushed again because i can’t walk in a straight line but he didn’t seem to mind. “what did you get?” he quizzed. 

i read the barista’s handwriting on the side of the cup. it was what i got whenever i went to a coffee shop but i still liked to get my answer right. “a half dark half white chocolate mocha with caramel. i got a double shot of espresso today so… we’ll see how that plays out.” my eyes trailed up to his face while we stopped at the crosswalk across from the park. he glanced down at me, eyes all content. his pupils were blown wide which made it hard to see the brown of his eyes. 

“don’t get a caffeine rush on me.” spencer told me. “i might not be able to handle you.” 

i scoffed with a squint of my eyes. “please, you’re able to handle me no matter what.” 

he agreed with me. 

while we were stepping away from the safety of the sidewalk i mindlessly grabbed spencer’s hand. it was just a habit i’ve always had. an instinct to reach out and hold onto whoever i was with while crossing the street. 

when we reached the other side i quickly released his hand. i met his eyes with my own. “sorry. force of habit.” i smiled shyly. 

spencer smiled back. “it’s okay.” 

he found an empty table to play chess at, which was the only one that wasn’t occupied. i never knew people favored playing chess in a park so much until now.

i sat down on a stone chair on one side of the board while spencer sat across from me, pulling a box of chess pieces out of his bag. i watched him slide the white colored pieces over to me. “do you just carry those around all the time?” i wondered while placing all the pieces in the correct places. 

“yeah.” he nodded. 

i smiled. “you have a marry poppins bag.” 

“i love marry poppins.” spencer hummed. 

i laughed quietly in endearment. he’s really pretty today. 

“okay,” i put my hands flush against one another and rubbed them together. “prepare to loose.” i slid one piece forward.

spencer shook his head. “in your dreams.” he moved a piece. 

i watched him and processed a few things i could do before moving. 

we went back and forth in silence for a few minutes before i looked up at him. he was looking at the board with furrowed brows. “when did you learn to play?” 

spencer moved a piece before answering. “when i was a kid. me and my mom would play a lot.” he focused on my lips for a moment before shifting to my eyes. he smiled almost timidly. 

i stole one of his pieces with my next move. it was held between my fingers beside my face. “gotcha.” i whispered. 

he took a piece of mine and mirrored me. “you were saying?”

i frowned. “you’re mean.” i moved again.

“this is all part of the game.” he laughed as we kept playing. 

i rested my head in my hand and stared at the pieces in thought. i moved another piece over the board before taking a quick sip of coffee. 

the park was nice today. there were a lot of people walking or sitting or playing chess like us. it was comfortable. i don’t know why i haven’t come here as much. 

spencer’s hair fell over his face when a light breeze blew through the park and i wanted to reach out and brush it out of his eyes. 

i don’t remember moving my arms to do so, but i leaned across the small table and did so anyway. spencer didn’t take his eyes off of mine, not while i was moving his hair with my fingertips on his skin, and not when his hand mirroring mine took the one in his hair in his own. he intertwined our fingers and i thought i was dreaming as he moved so our elbows were propping our joined hands over the board. 

he nonchalantly went back to the game, taking one of my pieces. “your move.” he squeezed my hand to snap me out of my trance the physical contact put me in. 

i nodded, pursing my lips. “right.” i felt like there was more attention on me and it made my focus dwindle. i still moved a piece that spencer took after a few moves, but he smoothed his thumb over the small extent of my hand he could touch. 

i smiled suddenly as i took a piece of his. “while i was leaving my building my neighbor asked me where i was going. when i told her i was seeing a friend she asked ‘the handsome tall one with brown hair’ and i thought that was such an accurate description of you.” i sipped more of my coffee. being outside had cooled it down significantly. 

spencer squeezed my hand that i was convinced he wasn’t ever going to let go. i met his eyes. “you think i’m…” he trailed off momentarily while he moved another piece. “tall?” he asked, that stupid but addicting smile slipped onto his lips. 

i scoffed, mouth open in an amused smile. “yes, yes i do.” i nodded with a laugh. “all 6’1 of you.” 

spencer’s eyes were so soft on mine. they were just full of adoration and endearment. i didn’t have a problem with getting lost in them. i’d get more lost just in his company every day. 

“you’re so beautiful…” his voice was so quiet i wouldn’t have caught what he’d said if i wasn’t looking at him. i read his lips in slow motion. 

“thank you.” 

we played the rest of the game in silence and secret glances. spencer won which didn’t surprise me. he told me i was good though, and that must mean i’m really good if its coming from him. 

spencer let go of my hand so that we could put the pieces away. my hand got cold immediately. i worked quickly to group the colors of pieces and slide them over to him. 

when we left the table, people immediately occupied it. i laughed slightly. 

“is there this many people here often?” i asked, my hand brushing his as we walked. 

he slowly interlaced our fingers again, being casual with it. “this isn’t the busiest it’s been.” he replied. i nodded, looking down at our joined hands. 

my feet stopped moving across the sidewalk and spencer stopped with me. “you okay?” 

i looked up at him, searching his eyes for what he must have searched mine for when he’d first kissed me. 

i wanted to kiss him. 

i can’t deny that anymore. 

so in the middle of the park in the afternoon i did just that. i stood on my toes and kissed him. my chest pressed against his and i swear i could feel his quickened heartbeat while our lips gently pressed together. 

spencer dropped my hand to cradle my face, meaning i couldn’t pull away so soon. and i was just fine with that. 

i slid my hand around his waist to his back. my palms pressed flat into him, making a soft hum pass from him to me. 

when we did pull away for breath, spencer whispered, “it’s not too early to love me.” his forehead pressed against mine. 

i smiled. “you heard me that night?”

“yeah.” he nodded subtly. “and i’ve played it over and over again in my head.” 

i smiled, tilting my head to kiss him once. “it sounds like you love me.” i ran my hands down his back. 

“i do.” he whispered. “i really do.” 

my head rested on his chest as i hugged him closer. his arms wrapped around me in an instant. “i’m sorry i made you wait for me.” i muttered. 

“i’d wait for you no matter what.” spencer replied, kissing the top of my head. 

i smiled in content, breathing in his scent that was like a muscle relaxant. everyone and everything around me and him just faded away. 

until both of us got a phone call. 

i frowned and dug into my pocket to answer the same time as spencer. 

“hello?” 

“hello my lovely, we have a case and need you here ASAP.” penelope’s cheerful voice filled my ear. i sighed and looked up at spencer as he gave me the same look. 

i nodded. “okay. we’ll start heading over.” 

“who’s ‘we’?” penelope asked. 

“me and spencer.” i replied, not really caring if she freaks out because it’s worth it for him. 

she squealed over the line. spencer had already hung up and was waiting for me. “that’s so adorable. okay, get here quick, hotch is looking at me impatiently.”

“okay. see you soon.” 

“bye!”

i shoved my phone back into my pocket. “there goes the weekend.” i took spencer’s hand as we walked to where his car was parked. 

“i’m glad we got to do this.” he told me. i smiled, running my thumb against his hand. 

“me too.” i agreed. 

spencer stopped in the middle of the sidewalk to kiss me once. i giggled with my eyes closed. “what was that for?” i wondered. 

“just to make sure this is real.” he replied. 

i stood on my toes to kiss him again. “it is.” 

he kissed me one more time, which resulted in some guy telling us to ‘get a room’ to which i started laughing, head leaned back. 

spencer started dragging me to his car with that, we were in the safety of it when he kissed me one last time. 

“the team is waiting.” i reminded him. 

his eyes went wide. “i forgot.” he chuckled softly. 

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

when we made it to the roundtable room morgan whistled at us. “about time.” 

i smiled awkwardly and sat down, spencer following right beside me. “sorry. my car wouldn’t start.” i lied. 

“ah yes, so you repaid pretty boy with a kiss?” 

i whipped my head towards spencer and noticed a mark from the tinted chapstick i was wearing on his lips. i discretely used my fingers to wipe away any color that escaped my lips. “that’s not from me that’s from… a random girl on the street.” i avoided everyone’s eyes while attempting not to smile. “she thought he was handsome.” 

the whole team exchanged a series of unconvinced looks. hotch was the first to speak. “start the brief garcia.” 

with that she got started, talking about the new case full of gruesome details that i only heard half of. i was too distracted by the way spencer grabbed my hand under the table and squeezed it to assure we were okay. 

the team definitely didn’t believe any of what i’d just said but it didn’t really matter. neither of us cared. 

it definitely wasn’t too early to love him. 

[lifewithsyfe]

Lifting the Veil

Not quite sure how to put this into words, but someone else needs to know what I know. This story can save people and I won’t feel right until it’s consumed by as many as possible. I can’t express how many times I’ve tried to get this out. I almost even gave up on it, but God wouldn’t let me. So, let me make another attempt at it - this is how I escaped the devil:

-

It was a Friday night, April 5th, 2019. 

I’m at El Rey on U street NW DC, having a few crispy beers by myself. Just got off work, taking it easy...

-

Then, I end up running into and old “friend” I used to hangout with. Known him for about 7 years at the time: (Dave) - tall, black, dreads, above average build.

-

After a couple of drinks, he asks if I want to hangout at one of his friends house. Said we can smoke there and that she has a lot of drugs. 

So I accepted cuz I was originally going to let the night unravel on it’s own and it didn’t sound like such a bad idea at the time.

-

It was a habitual routine I developed during my heartache…

I’d go out alone, run into a group of people I knew, bar hop ‘til we ended up at an after hours spot (or someone’s place) and shamelessly sleep my next day away.

-

So we get to the front of his friend’s building and she’s like a 60 something-year-old lady: 

(Robin) - fat, white, short, blue hair, top row gold grill and “ride or die bitch” tattooed on the back of her neck (amongst a couple others, but that one stood out most because it was in my face while she was unlocking her apartment door).

-

At first, I thought it was a descriptive-type of tattoo. Like, she was saying that that’s what she was.

But in retrospect, it was almost like it was something she saying to me...you’ll see what I mean later, if you don’t get it now.

-

Oblivious to what was about to happen next, I continued to walk through that door...

Something felt off, but I just figured it would be something low-level weird. 

I’m always seeing signs that show somebody dabbles in magic or gives a head nod to the prince of darkness (such as a pentagram or something), but I figured “if I’m not actively practicing divinity or doing weird rituals, it won’t personally affect me…if I don’t create a ceremonial invitation, then I’ll be okay.”

-

Now, I’ve already had a good amount of spiritual experiences at this point (good and bad), but for some reason I just didn’t think anything like this would happen…at least not to me. 

-

I thought I had it all figured out, because I thought I’d seen it all - or at least enough. 

I should’ve known though…I was just so emotionally numb at the time, I was doing anything to feel anything.

I mean aesthetically speaking, in a worldly sense, she looked like she’d have a few good stories or something. Needless to say by now, but I ignored the red flags in hopes of escaping my pain. 

-

So, moving forward...

We walk into her apartment, sit on the couch, watch skate videos and start breaking some weed down.

After a few minutes of small talk, they offer me some acid in a vile. Emphasizing how it was very high grade stuff, but I didn’t need much convincing anyway. I was growing bored and undergoing an overwhelming amount of emotional damage.  

-

Now, I was very into psychedelics and considered myself extremely experienced in that realm. 

But just because I did it a lot, didn’t mean I was. You couldn’t tell me otherwise though.

It was usually my go-to for when I needed that unrivaled escape from reality. 

So yeah, I took the witch’s brew, still thinking it was something I considered fun.

-

Once it started to kick in, I could feel her beginning to stare at me from the end of the room with a big grin on her face.

She then suggested that I take my jacket off because I was going to end up getting really hot, then cackled like it was the funniest thing in the world to say.

-

It was something she said a couple of times too. At first I didn’t know exactly what she meant, I just thought she was a basket case repeating herself. But she was implying that I was going to end up in Hell…you’ll see what I mean.

-

A few moments go by and they both suggest we move the party to the rooftop because her place was limiting and we could see more from up there anyway. 

Plus, she wanted to blow bubbles (possibly a way to distract me from their underlying plot)…and I figured “tripping indoors is boring anyway, why not?”

-

Now because I took my jacket off and left it in her apartment, I began shivering after a while. 

I didn’t expect for it to be that windy, I only wanted a nice little breeze.

So she says she’ll get me a something cozy to put on and that she had to go in for more soap anyway. She comes back and asks to put this fur coat on me. It was nice, so I let her. It had an invigorating energy attached to it, I can't lie. I felt like a million bucks.

-

So I’m comfortable now and she gives me a a little rooftop tour, showing me the visible landmarks from each corner.

Mentioning for me to not to be afraid of my true potential and that I can obtain everything I want. 

I was feeling pretty good about those words, until I thought to myself “that sounds familiar…what if she isn’t speaking in general?” - but I just chalked it up to her being an old hippy. 

-

She then grabs my arm and tells me to look at this red wall, as we walk to the other side of the building. I figured it’d be something visually enticing she was trying to share, but this was going to be her first attempt at hypnosis. There were lights spaced out by every three steps we took, so it would go red-black-red-black-red-black... 

-

Then she asked if it felt like my soul was being massaged - encouraging me to ride it out...essentially, trying to get me to put my guard down, saying “this is where dreams become reality.” 

Then, I began seeing holographic outlines of people in the wall. The traces reminded me somewhat of a glowing snail trail.

-

Right after, I saw myself turn into a block of deformed flesh and almost being slid into the wall if I stared any longer. 

But like I woke up in one of those falling dreams, I snapped out of it with my heart racing.

-

Then with a laugh attached, she exclaims “damn, almost!” 

And that’s when I stopped letting myself be completely naive. The veil was clearly being lifted before me and I needed to be alert. It’s just, I had this slight muffle surrounding my common sense for some reason. Surely it must've been a spell she cast.

-

Now I knew hallucinogens were considered sorcery in the Bible, but I figured one more time couldn't hurt. It’s not like I wasn’t still smoking and drinking. 

It’s just crazy, because it was after learning about the what the fallen angels taught us in the Book of Enoch, is when I decided to trip again. I blatantly chose to play with fire and defy God that night. 

-

See, these hypnotic spells are telepathic contracts. Once the manipulator is installing a vision, it’s at the last second where it becomes your choice to see what happens next.  

It nudges at your curiosity, feeling like it’s a part of the trip you’re supposed to let happen.

But every time I almost did, my heart wouldn't allow it and I’d snap out of it again.

-

Every time she would make another attempt, I could feel my soul almost getting tugged at, with a malicious presence surrounding me. 

The goosebumps I got from this thing, felt like it was ready to defile me in every way possible.

-

In disbelief that what I thought might be happening, wasn’t - I tell myself “let me not cause a ruckus for no reason, I am trippin’ after all. Think of something positive.”

But now my eyes are shifting everywhere, because I keep getting a glimpse of whatever’s approaching. 

Even with that many peculiarities, something kept me in denial.

-

Still though, she tries another set-up and tells me to look at how high up we are, as she gestured for me to look down from the rail. As if I didn’t already know, but I go because I also didn’t want to be rude. I wasn't sure if everything happening was all in my head or not at the time, so I remained as cool as I could.

-

I grab the rail and look over…

(Dave) says “don’t let go,” giving me this wide-eyed look with a smile and said “you feel it, don’t you?”

Then just like that, my heart jumped and my mind began getting flashes of demonic symbols and images like subliminal messages. I even saw random equations in the air, like measurements and ratios of whichever object I laid my eyes on.

-

My vision was about to go black, exactly like the circle closing at the end of a cartoon…until I snapped out of it yet again and backed up with my head on a swivel, angrily questioning them. 

That’s when I caught (Dave) behind me, quickly hiding his hands. 

-

Now I’m on survival mode and it feels like I can’t even make a step without risking my soul, literally. Each step mattered. 

It's at this point that I can feel that I’m being made a fool out of, but of course they gaslight me and try to calm me down.

I still didn’t want to believe I was in this kind of mess, but I’d be a fool to let all of that slide so easily. I couldn't keep lying to myself, as bad as I wanted to.

-

So with caution, I’m trying to plan my escape - playing dumb, but my body is getting heavier by the second too.

She then lifts her speaker and says “listen to these different frequencies, it can change your mood.”

I really wasn’t trying to, because I needed to leave and I didn’t trust her at all now. Especially not with anything sound related.

Then out of nowhere, I hear a distorted garble come out of the speaker and hit my ear.

-

I  asked “what the fuck!?”

Then (Dave) was responds with “oh, you heard that...?”

I looked away and acted oblivious not knowing how I'm going to get out of this, because I felt that if they knew I could hear that, they’d bring out the big guns.

-

(Dave) laughed, saying to Robin “wait, he still don’t know what this is yet?”

Unintentionally, or intentionally letting me know what it was. 

So I tried to leave and they started laughing because the door needed a key fob in order to get to the elevators. They kept suggesting I have a seat, trying so hard to keep me there.

-

(Dave) said “you already ‘bouta do it, it’s better this way anyway.”

Then he was like “look at my hands, this shit trippy, right?”

Followed by him creating an infinity symbol with his waving hands. 

Now this infinity symbol was made of light and floating in mid-air in front of him after he did it. I even looked at it from the side to confirm that it was real.

Right after that, he did the Baphomet pose, flipping his hands and head perfectly in a stiff dance.

Which then caused me to see it’s true form in my minds eye, with a heavy vibration. Another attempt at making me slip, as I try to keep my reality gripped.

-

Once I can see them again, it’s like time stood still and only I could move. 

I’d look around and they’d be frozen. 

At this time, I can hear them having two simultaneous conversations. 

Although, all I caught was (Dave) say “he can’t hear us in this plane.”

-

Then as he slowly got up, it like I was tuning through a radio, I hear a screeching static clear up. The sound then becomes like an electronic bleating and bellowing from a goat, in-sync, surrounding him.

-

This was the moment I became a part of their their collective conscious conversation - essentially telepathy.

Then they began letting me know who they were. Saying that they were angels, that they were around before us and that I can be like them.

-

The whole time they were talking to me, they were trying to weaken and hypnotize me with hand signs - trying to convince me to let go. Thing is, when they did try to convince me, they’d always talk around the subject at hand...but once you know what the subject is, the situation becomes clear. 

-

A lot of people might think they’d get physical and get out of there. I just don’t think they’d understand how it is fighting sleep paralysis, awake. 

I also knew that one false move would take me to the ‘sunken place.’

-

I knew I couldn’t just stand there though. But right before I grab the door to get to the elevator, (Dave) says “okay, you gon’ be waiting on that elevator forever; this is a REAL trip…c’mon, I thought you liked this shit, right?” 

Mockingly he asked “yeah, I guess you gon’ think twice about taking LSD again huh?”

-

I was thinking in my head “fuck, did I really just lose my soul? Is this how it happens to people? Is this where it all ends for me?”

I thought that was it, so I was about to give in and accept the offer - see what benefits I could get, if any. I figured living a worldly lifestyle would be better than dying immediately.

-

Then from there, every time we almost sealed the deal, I would feel a hungry fire approach me from behind. Almost like a burning lick.

The one time I decided to look for where it was coming from, I got a vision with an glowing orange blur in it - slowly materializing, until I could make something out of it. Then with the bit that I saw, I knew it was me being swallowed by fire and not dying. 

-

Immediately after, almost as if I had touched the flames themselves, I yelled in confusion “What? No! Yeshua Hamashiach is my Lord and Savior!”

To which (Dave) nonchalantly responds “okay, you do that...that [N-word] died a long time ago.” 

I sharply look at him with disgust and continued my prayer.

Mentioning to God that He promised He would never abandon His children if they encountered evil and that if there was a way for Him to save me, to do it.

-

Dave says that I’m blowing his trip and leaves to the gas station.

I could’ve left then and there, but I still didn’t want to be alone in an elevator with him. There's no telling what he has under his sleeve or how I might react in while in there.

-

So as I’m praying, I begin to feel the dark hold they had on my heart loosen up. It was like my heart was pumping physical light throughout my body, then all around it. I could feel the forcefield - the LORD had arrived and I could move my body freely. No more fear in taking the wrong step.

-

So on (Dave’s) way back, (Robin) announces it and says let’s go downstairs and get him. That’s when I hear (Dave) say - not yell, “open up” from all the way downstairs and I was amazed...I asked myself “wait, can he still hear me?” 

With him responding “DUH! Damn, you some shit!” and continued on his way. Then it all came to me, I'm sure hidden witches and warlocks communicate like this whenever they encounter one another. Whether it be at parties, art shows or even churches...a fleeting thought, but a concrete one nonetheless.

-

So back to us going to get (Dave) - if I was to leave, this was going to be my chance.

In the elevator she tries enchanting me again, but I rebuked every attempt. She seemed so confident with a huge smile, as if she already won the battle. 

But I’m trying to maintain focus the best that I can, so I don’t slip - which made this elevator ride unnecessarily more intense than it needed to be.   

-

Once the elevator door finally opens, I see (Dave’s) silhouette behind a thick glass rail, carrying an ominous slouch. 

Walking towards me, he notices that I’ve calmed down. I guess he expected me to be spazzing out, screaming about devils and spirits...I already knew how that would make me look though. So when he sees my face, he smiles and asks “oh, you’re good now?”

I guess he assumed the process was complete...

-

Instead, I replied “yeah, I’m not with this goofy shit y'all got goin' on”

So as I’m walking towards the exit, he yells “that’s not the way out!”

To where I respond “fuck y’all!”

-

You would’ve thought I opened the door before touching it, the way I left out so fast. 

As that door closed, I did a little jog to get across the street. 

But a few seconds later, I feel this tingle in the back of my brain (specifically the medulla oblongata), as though it had neck hairs that stood up. 

I look over my shoulder and noticed he decided to follow me…of course. Shortly after I noticed him - with that bull-like slouch, he started to run. 

-

Now I was a little ahead of him, so I didn’t start running yet. I had to make sure I knew where I was going before exerting my energy.

Every time I moved my head, I could feel the tingle coming from his direction like a compass always pointing North. 

So there was no losing him, at least not easily - but I am fast.

-

I couldn’t call a ride because my phone was dead and I couldn’t go to anyone’s house at the time, because it was around 5am.

As (Dave) got closer, I felt my vision going black and my body getting heavy again. A lot stronger this time…time to kick it into high gear.

-

Once it clicks into my head that the easiest place to catch a taxi in such a heated moment would be in Adams Morgan, an opportunity presented itself.

-

Ahead of me was a crosswalk and the orange hand was counting down it’s last seconds. Everything I ever learned told me I wasn’t going to make it, but I wasn’t going to stop running either.

-

So when my foot lands off the sidewalk, is when the cars to my left and right begin to move. 

That’s when everything moved in-slow-motion…and a burst of energy launched me across the street. I saw that moment like a painting in my mind. Sweat with streetlight reflections, my hair slightly messy, clothes moving with the wind, chain dancing and molecular debris falling from my shoes. 

-

That moment bought me time because the cars acted as a barrier as soon as I made it, so he was stuck across the street for a little bit. But he didn't give up. This is when I start hearing scribbly garbles rolling and jumping off of buildings and into my ear “you acting like a lil bitch - come back!”

Perfectly delivered as if he was next to me…I look behind me and it’s like he hasn’t broke a sweat. Completely focused, but still plenty of distance.

-

From the gas station diagonal to the 9:30 Club (where Robin lives), to the McDonald’s in Adam’s Morgan...

My body wanted to give out most of the way, but soul wouldn’t allow it.

I just had to keep running until I found a taxi - which I did. I was going to live to tell the tale; I had to.

-

That’s when Dave caught up, yelling “you look like a unk right now!” 

Because 4 taxis stopped for me coming from each direction in that intersection.

To where I respond “I don’t give a fuck, I made it out and you mad as shit!” 

I get in the car and tell the taxi driver to head towards Maryland. I’ll give him the address on the highway.

-

Finally, after surviving a living nightmare, I made it home. 

I went to my room, played some worship music, got on my knees and wrung myself out of tears to the Lord.

-

Unable to sleep because I knew they could contact me in my dreams.

So I didn’t rest until the drug wore off, which was on the next day in the afternoon…

I even felt that burn on my back as if it was sunburn for the next couple of weeks after.

-

I’m so grateful to still be alive and myself, because I’m 100% positive I’d be in Hell (with something else in my vessel) if I didn’t call on God that night.

It was like I was tiptoeing on a needlepoint to keep my soul.

-

Since then, I've been learning a lot more to keep myself more spiritually fortified and spreading my experience in hopes of leading others into a life of light into the hands of the Lord. I hope this story can do something positive for whoever comes across it, so feel free to share to those you love. God bless you.

[paganmoonbaby]

Sunday 14th Jan

Yesterday was my Sunday reset and day for releasing and welcoming the new week!

I cleaned a lot in my apartment because it had been stressing me out a lot. I’m not quite done but it’s at least clean now. still a bit cluttered, tomorrow my kind of like support from the state is coming to motivate me to clean so I’m gonna do the declutterring and stuff like that then.

They are so incredible, at first I was so embarrassed for having them. but because of my intense adhd, history with addiction and mental health issues I realized that even if I’m doing okay, I need these people that come, treat me like a person and help me get started. Simply the fact that they are coming makes me motivated to clean because it makes me think like “omg they can’t come here when it’s such a mess”. I’m starting to accept and appreciate the help that I’m given and started to be so amazed and proud to live in a country (I live in Sweden) that actually cares so much and tries their best to make criminals/ addicts like me not to fall back to their habits. Even though Sweden isn’t perfect.

Anyways I did something a little bit different to make my cleaning a little more magical

Herbal floor cleaning

I put ingredients corresponding to my intention and wants in my water that I then used to wipe my surfaces, especially around my front door and everything surrounding it. And then wiped my floor with it for protection and good vibes for the coming week. I think I might keep doing this and maybe make a finished bottle of infused water to use on a regular basis. We’ll see!

• I used my normal big water bucket I use for cleaning, cleansed it with sound and poured in hot water. Adding a bit of my new moon water from this new moon in Capricorn.

Capricorns are driven and what I would say very tough so in my mind the lunar energies when the moon is in Capricorn would be perfect for banishing and protection.

• I added a few drops of lavender essential oil for calmness and peace

• And rosemary essential oil for general protection

• I then added my normal cleaning solution, I did however intentionally used an orange smelling one to in my mind bring some joy because that’s what oranges are associated with.

• I took a reusable tea bag and added dried orange for joy and positivity. Lavender for peace and cedar leaves for purification and protection

____

I cleaned and cleansed my altar and took a moment to out a tea offering on Athena’s altar and speaking a little with her though her pendulum. It’s funny cuz my other pendulums she doesn’t seem to be connecting with. But the one I bought now she is so enthusiastic about using. Is swings clear and stops almost on its own between questions. I asked if she wanted to do a tarot and unlike the last time where I got a no, she did want to.

And it’s so fucking funny and incredible because I asked what I could do to make her happier. And told her to throw out the card. I shuffled like twice and a card flew out like half a meter and Landed on the floor. I looked at it and it was a 7 of pentacles. I look at that card as growing and taking care of your possessions. Because the man is just standing there looking I’m interpreting it as like being thoughtful whether or not to harvest and use the money right?? I’m a novice in tarot so please add if you have any thoughts.

The funny thing about this is that this month I’ve been INCREDIBLY irresponsible with my money and basically blew my whole paycheck in a week. And how freaking fast that card flew and how far, dude she was very sure about what was wrong. So I promised her I’m going to do my best and my goals now is to only order online for not more than 50 dollars a month and to only buy lunch for work once a week and focus on bringing my own food. usually when I buy food it’s pretty cheap but I do it like every day so imma have to cut back on that.

I also asked how she viewed our relationship and instantly the empress flew out and that made me tear up a little/ a lot.

Sorry for so much rant but my I filled up my journal and need to make a new one so everything is just gonna end up here

[the-firebird69]

I fed up with these people I can't believe how long it takes just for him to get Wi-Fi it's like 3 months of sitting around no it's been a long time like two years or something I've had it with these people they're so freaking stupid that's a jamming into a f****** can. They're trying to go after us and they're saying the whole time and nobody's pissed off at him when he says is get this s*** out of the way so he can take care of people that are a problem because these people are people you can beat up yourself so he sat down in a meeting right after went after the little s*** I said how many people want to be out of this today the raise your hand slowly so I got something this needs a lot more aggression here these people need to be handled aggressively and sitting there munching on him and that's you everyday and I looked at I listening to me when I say I'm telling you people this cuz he's sick and tired of hearing it who do we use as an intermediate these people are not into meeting and the max sounds stupid enough he said they lean forward and they say well they're not I said our team is stupid are you stupid you don't look like the Max and you're not the max just like these idiots I hired you to do the job a bunch of fruitcakes to beat me to death which is what these people are doing so I looked at him and said what are you doing hit that one hit that one and also they said oh yeah so I said are we tired or we need to we do I figure out what it is so it went down and started to go after these idiots and what they're saying is we're not in position yet so we started to take them down and they're pretty much going to go real fast the next couple days and I could not believe how awful it was. So we started attacking them today

-we wasted about 50 50,000 that is in Charlotte county and said this progress and then we found on the rear ring the first ring that they were planning attack and they're 20 up from the neighborhood so we went around and we hit people who are going to do that tour and I was saying what's going on here did you grow a brain so the other started doing it and started to keep them out and they went out to the 12th ring and said let's make it bigger that was the McDonald's and they put in a 13th ring it's like 10 miles wide and yeah they work on the road too so they have this huge stretch assholes have to go through to get here and they pretty much have a lot harder time and yeah I went up to Jason and I told him to stay away from you and I'm big probably like 7 ft in bulky it says why should I because some guy says so I told him what I do to him if you tried going by here again and I walked off and violator came by and said did you see me coming and then he's looking back he's going to say something and Lily says for him to shut up and stop harassing the boy so he says no and it was Trump and son and it's hot out and nobody sees anything coming and Trump circle back because he knows the a****** is not going to do it what he says and he's right in front of him what he's saying he's going to do something to our son and Trump examine says I can see how frustrated it is that's how we do things he goes that's right and he hit him right in the face. Well okay the gun to an argument that's what they always do but people see it and starting to fight between them it's a big fight.

-about 20,000 of them died cuz they're fighting on the street and we had our share getting them from it so it works and it's good

-about 3 trillion are lined up already no it's 3% are lined up and they're the idiots and yeah they're running out of people we have a blockade going into position around the islands and all of them and Max are moving in and McDonald's going in and they're moving in and they move more saucers and the foreigners are moving in a little and then probably start firing on the s**** cuz they suck their blood and stuff. If these 3% attack we said they're 4.5% left of this particular group it will leave 1.5% that's pretty small they're building up still and it's really like 3.15% and they're getting up there again I mean it's starting to speed up again there's a lot of them forming up it's a lot okay and we are getting ready we anticipate 3.5% bringing their total to 1% off Island it's a number that's not very big and Max and McDonald's are stepping up attacks from the aircraft carrier groups it was like 300 aircraft carriers for one of their areas and they're having them bomb the place cuz they're opposing areas and it started taking off from air bases with big jets and big ones like half mile and they're bombing the s*** out of their own this is taking about 0.1% an hour of them out and it won't happen anywhere to hide

-in Florida the housing was down to 5% not including houses and it was cut in half the 2.5% right now it's at 2% the majority of it would be trailer parks at about 1% and 0.5% at other landlords and the remainder is hotels and motels and Airbus. Houses account for about 13.5% of Florida's housing still and we are courting off areas they're in by the end of the day they're probably will only be 10% and that that's not about five to seven people in the house but right now it's like 20 people in the house and yes disgusting the toilets going all day long and it's always blocked up the septics being pumped out all the time all you have to do is follow the septic trucks

Is more but we're going to post it's getting huge

Thor Freya

We have to start moving faster and we have to react faster people are not going to be as slow as these idiots we need to speed it up and stop talking to these morons and others I'm putting in the edict out I'll say if this if this was hard you should realize it's going to be harder and we don't have time to talk to you tomorrow and they're forcing us to and we don't want to and it's not what you should do

Hera Zues

It's very true and we're going to have a special meeting because we need to finish these idiots off especially the clones and we have a huge offensive plan for tonight and giant things are happening move those damn buildings out I'm going to track that piece of crap

Thor Freya

You can see it works but it's dangerous and they're constantly threatening our son he's retards had to go a long time ago and we're going to put it in writing that they have to go now

Olympus

[mommyhot3lbows]

rating my random usernames over the years

MissForever24

-10000/10

no cuz wtf is this like what the actual hell is happening here... idk how and why i thought this was cool.... like okay miss forever 24????????????? out of all??????????

nuw.singe

- infinity/10

another fucktard move from me and i CRINGE so bad remembering how i used to simp over william singe in form 2.... like at freaking 14 y/o???????? and the way i acted like he's like so handsome and shit, and if i remember this correctly i did TRIED to convince myself that hes good looking (lmao v funny and pathetic for a lot of reasons) HES NOT EVEN HOT OR HANDSOME BRUH (his voice is but THATS NOT THE POINT)

imalivingmeme

8/10

i feel like this era was really good for me since i feel like that username really belonged to me, chose this one bcs i used to give like these weird faces and over exaggerated reactions (like a meme) when people are talking to me somehow #peoplepleaser101

but still, i do feel like this username was a match in heaven for me since i liked it sm back then bcs i felt like it was made for me specifically

imahidupmeme

8/10

tbh the same as above, just i adjusted it a little bit bcs my twitter got suspended lol i used these random usernames most of the time for my twitter account and guess who got their twitter account suspended for the 9274828484894 time ;)))))))))))))))))))))

1M4L1V1N9M3M3 / 1M4H1DUPM3M3

7/10

again, just another version of the username said above, and tbh i couldn't remember which either of these two i did use (lol) but im more convinced on the second one

and yes, the way i came to this version of the username is bc my twt acc got suspended (again) and i saw a lot of these aesthetic/twt accs that i really liked reading having similar type of username (like using numbers and stuff) so i felt like i shd make one as well

totjanedoe

9.5/10

ah yes. my depressive and emo phase. LOL.

i came to this one bc i was depressed in that moment, so the only thing i kept thinking of was k-lling myself, and how i wished to be unknown, like nobody like remember me and stuff if i really died.

so i got the inspo from the horror movie of the autopsy of jane doe where jane doe means like a female corpse who is unable to be identified/nobody came to claim (basically unidentified female corpse) and tot is d3ad in german.. so... yeah...

the literal translation of it is adeadunknown but then i modified it into totjanedoe, and here it is, my present username.

707J4N3D03

100/10

again, another reciprocation of the username above just in a more aesthetic towards twitter kind of way lol but yeah definitely into this username A LOT (at the moment)

mommyhot3lbows

100/10

honestly this sounds so goofy and so me at the same time i like it. the inspo behind this username was actually from liesa bcs she enjoyed playing with my elbows so much bcs its 'tajam' and this instantly reminded me of the 'daddy long legs' phrase i cant remember where its from but basically i adapted it into my version and here it is..

honourable mentions that didn't get to be finalised by me:

tomyamayampercik

2/10

i remember thinking abt this in seseri in the shower when i was showering with uni, and i talked abt how i want to use that username for my new twt acc since the old one got suspended and i was waiting for spm to end so i could make another one (my current twt acc btw)

plus i was hungry and craving for dm's delicious tomyam and ayam percik when they had that menu back when we were in form 1 (I LIKED IT SM I MISS IT)

[twordytings]

Special Soldier

(Bucky x Reader)

Summary: Bucky has always been one to push limits. Unfortunately for this time, you’re the victim.

Word Count: 1,019

A/N: I feel like the timeline is off with this so let’s just pretend endgame never happened cuz thats what we all want to do anyways T-T this had been in my drafts for a while so I wanted to finally complete it! Enjoyyyyyy

Saturday mornings were your absolute favorite. Probably because you had the whole rest of the day to do whatever you wanted, and the day after. It gave you such a nostalgic feeling.

“Mornin’ bug.” Bucky said as he hugged you from behind as you were making yourself some iced coffee. You loved your brother Steve, there was no doubt about that, but ever since Bucky joined the team, you had grown a liking towards him in specific. You both had the strongest relationship there was, even Steve grew jealous at times.

“Morning.” You said with a yawn.

“Still tired?”

“Yeah. I was up late doing work so I wouldn’t have any over the weekend.”

“No wonder all you drink is coffee.” Bucky said in a mocking tone. You scoffed and playfully slapped his arm. “Hehey!”

“I happen to like my daily cup of iced coffee thank you very much.” You said pridefully. “At least I’m not a loser who drinks tea in the morning...” You said as you eyed the cup of tea he had in his hand.

“Ok you did not just call me a loser.”

“Welp. Guess I did.” You said walking away, but not before coughing “loser” into your elbow. Bucky smiled and shook his head, setting his cup of tea down only to walk right after you and scoop you up, taking the coffee out of your hands to put it on the counter.

“Nooooo! Buck put me downnnn!” You pleaded as you kicked your legs out in an attempt to escape.

“Remember what me and the team used to do when you were little and kept being snarky? Hm?” You knew exactly what he was talking about.

“OH HELL NO! NONONO!” You said, kicking your legs even harder since that was all you could do.

“Oh c’mon you used to love it when you were little!”

“Not anymore! Buck, it is way too early for this...” You said tiredly, hoping he would let up.

“Fine...” He put you down. “you better watch your back though, ‘cause I won’t be so easy on you next time...” He said walking away, pointing two of his fingers at his eyes and then back at you.

“Yeah yeah whatever.” You probably should’ve marked his words a little better.

———

Later that day at about 7:30PM, the team were all sat in the living room for movie night

“Nope. You’re not getting away this time...” Bucky said menacingly as he held you in a bear hug on the couch. You were messing around with each other and you ended up throwing popcorn at his face. It probably wasn’t the best idea considering what he had told you earlier that day.

“Buck I’m sorry I’m really really really sorry just please let me goHOHOHOHO NOOOO!” Before you could finish your pleas for mercy, he began pinching your ribs, making your voice go up about ten octaves. The team started to collectively chuckle at your predicament, considering not having seen you like this in a while. They used to tickle you all the time when you were younger, but you started to grow out of it, so they slowly laid off. Bucky, on the other hand, was in the mood for the opposite.

“Sorry bug but I told you I’d get you next time...” he said, bringing his arm up above his head and forming a claw with his hand. You looked at his hand, taking as many breaths as you could before your untimely demise. It was game over for you.

“Please don’t.” you tried saying innocently, giving him the best puppy dog eyes you could possibly muster up.

“Awww so cute. I’m still gonna do it though,” he said simply, bringing his claw straight back down, and violently shaking it into your belly, while bringing his other hand up to do the same to you ribs.

“GUHUHUYS A LIHITTLE HEHEHELP HEHEHEHEHERE!” you cried, but you had a feeling no one was going to help you; not when they were witnessing what, to them, was the most adorable sight to see. They mentally cooed at you, not wanting to look away or disrupt what was happening before them.

“Betcha thought they were gonna help you, huh? It’s just you n’ me kiddo...,” he said, followed by an evil laugh through gritted teeth. He then switched to creeping his arms inside of your shirt, which made everything twenty times worse. The feeling of his cold metal arm - and his real one, of course - wiggling and clawing at your ribs and stomach was the most unbearable thing imaginable. All you could do was kick your legs and squirm around, but that was no match for the super soldier you were currently trapped by.

“THIS ISN’T FAHAHAHAHAIR!”

“What? The fact that you threw popcorn at my face or that your too ticklish for your own good? I think it’s both if we’re being honest-”

“SHUT UHUHUHUP!”

“Okay you’re pretty much asking for it at this point y/n. Get her armpits Buck.” Tony chimed.

“WHAT? NONONONONO!”

“Yesyesyesyesyessss!” Bucky mocked, pulling your arms with ease as he shoved his hands into the hollows of your underarms. You had practically melted into a puddle at this point, not being able to move or make any sound with how intense his tickling was.

“I think she gets the point bud. Release.” Steve said; you’d thank him for that later.

“Oh fine.” Bucky relented as he adjusted your shirt to its correct position. “You okay butterfly?” he said compassionately. You couldn’t help but smile at that, and he knew it too. Usually he would use nicknames along the lines of bug, or stinker, but every once in a while he would call you butterfly, and you loved it.

Bucky pulled you up into a hug, rubbing your shoulder to calm your nerves after the torture you’d just endured.

“You still suck,” you quipped, not wanting to let him off too easily.

“Oh please. You love me,” he said with a chuckle. You simply hummed in response, slowly drifting to sleep, the movie nothing but background noise.

[alirhi]

10 Sebastian roles as boyfriends

Because... I'm bored and I feel like it. 😂 Probably some spoilers for, like... everything? So yeah... That.

Putting it under here for easy scrolling:

10: Chase Collins

Who doesn't love a goofball? In the first half of the movie, Chase is basically perfect. He's sweet, funny, not all caught up in his ego, and actually pays attention to what the girls around him are saying, not just to what he wants to hear. If not for the whole... it was all an act to get close to Caleb and try to steal his magic thing, Chase would actually be a damn good high school boyfriend. He's adorable and would be a fun date, but he's also only 18 so best not to start making long-term plans lol. Also, y'know... the whole psycho revenge/power grab thing.

9 Jack Benjamin

Y'all. Y'all. Words cannot describe how much I love Jack. Pretty sure I've made this clear. As a person/character in general, he's absolutely in my Top 3 - not just of Sebastian's characters, but any character ever. ❤ But as a boyfriend? Boy's got baggage. It's what makes me so protective of him, but seeing as how he's trapped in the closet thanks to his overbearing homophobic family and the insane expectations heaped on him, as the show left him, he can't handle an honest relationship. He's too easily influenced by all the wrong people, poor babe.

8 Chris (Destroyer)

On paper, undercover cop sounds cool and exciting, but even if you ignore the fact that he, y'know, dies... Chris got in too deep and kinda lost the mission, so to speak. Best case scenario, you're his sexy partner and in on it all with him and end up on the lam for the rest of your lives. Worst case, this man lies for a living, so can you even trust him? And... yeah. The whole dead thing. Chris is hot af but getting involved with him is a recipe for disaster.

7 Ben

Min and Hathor have mercy, I love Ben! He's smart, he's snarky, he's caring and loyal... he's an absolute disaster. He's another one who seems allergic to honesty, until his lying and avoiding nearly kill his girlfriend. Not exactly relationship goals lol. Everything before totally was, though! Ben's adorable, and I love how he stayed up all night to protect his girlfriend (from a ghost/demon thing... with a baseball bat. I said he was smart, not perfect, okay? XD points for effort lol)

6 Mickey Henry

I. LOVE. MICKEY. Oml I love Mickey. He's a spazz and - even more so than Ben - an absolute disaster of a human being, but I love him. Pros for dating Mickey Henry: he's fun, he's carefree, he'll cook for you even though he's kinda bad at it lol, he loves his son and wants to be a good dad, he wants his partner to be happy and to love life as much as he does. Cons, and the reason he's not higher on the list: He's a pushover; easily influenced by the toxic people in his life, and it gets him into a lot of trouble. Being easily influenced by toxic dumpster fire of a human being Chloe almost lost him the partial custody of his son that he barely even had. He's an absolute sweetheart, but he's a complete man-child, and dating him would often feel more like raising him.

5 Frank "Suffer Buddy"

Come on! You know he and Mickey had to be back-to-back - they're practically the same character! 😂 Frank is Mickey... slightly more grown up. He's still a disaster, but he's respectful of boundaries, he's caring, he's funny in a dry, witty way that I just adore, and hoo lordy that man is a giver! 🥴🥵 Honestly, if he didn't smoke and didn't ditch Daphne in the middle of a party hours away from everything familiar to her surrounded by strangers to go do drugs, I'd call Frank perfect. He listened, he respected her wishes, he tried to keep some distance between them when he found out she'd gone on a date with his best friend (it failed utterly and brought us to the "damn that man's good with his mouth" portion of the movie lmao but still)... I don't have a whole lot of experience with men who actually give a shit, okay? So Frank is like a goddamn unicorn to me lmao. But that drug thing... That keeps him at the bottom of the Top 5 for me. Sorry, bb

4 Bucky

I can already hear everyone on here raging at me for placing Bucky so low on this list, but hear me out: I love this man. I love all four iterations of this man. Flirty 40s Bucky was a doll (fun date, not commitment material). Post-POW camp 40s Bucky had a fire to him that set me on fire. The Winter Soldier can choke me any damn day. Unf. And TFATWS Bucky... Oh, lady above, 2023 Bucky is a gem! He's sweet, snarky, and broken. He feels utterly, wretchedly alone in the world, and everyone around him, including his only friend, is telling him to "man up" and "make amends" for shit that was never his fault to begin with, rather than helping him come to terms with all that he's suffered and all that he's survived. Bucky needs and deserves love. A relationship with him would be so solid, if he found the right person... But it would take a fuck ton of work. He needs someone strong, patient, and more stubborn than he is to prod him until he finds a better therapist and actually opens up, and to keep him on track because even good therapy comes with homework. He does have to "do the work," Sam was right about that much, but he was way off base with what that "work" is. Bucky needs help and understanding, and he would be an amazing boyfriend... if he found someone with the strength to help him weather his nightmares and flashbacks, and help pull him out of this PTSD pit he's been in since 1943.

3 Chris Beck

Big brains turn me on, okay? 😂This man is an astronaut and a surgeon! Yes, please! Come here, you sexy genius! He's smart, he's funny - pretty sure Sebastian is incapable of playing anyone who's not delightfully snarky lol. He's pragmatic when he needs to be but there's also nothing he wouldn't do or risk for the ones he loves. This man is husband material and I cannot be convinced otherwise! So why isn't he #1? Cuz of the whole... spending years in space, thing. Super cool job and I'd be his biggest fan on the ground, but god damn, I would miss him while he's away!

2 TJ Hammond

Look, I'm gender fluid and he's a little bit bi 😂😂😂 Let me have my fantasy, okay? TJ's definitely got a lot of shit to work through, but love brings out the best in him. Before that fucking closeted shitbag broke his heart and stomped on it for good measure, TJ was clean and sober for months, he was happy, he was playing piano again, he was pulling himself together. Not only would he be an amazing boyfriend, but his partner would get the extra joy of getting to watch their love and devotion to him be the thing that saves this beautiful man's life. It's not healthy overall to tie your self worth and will to live to a relationship, but if he found the right person who would be there for him through all of life's shit and stick it out, I think he'd be okay. Even after his lowest point and without the support of his family, TJ still had a dream and he still chased it. He's not just the sweetest person to ever grace our screens, but he's ambitious and business-savvy, too. Keep him off drugs and watch this man take over the world, I'm telling you!

So why is TJ only #2? Well, besides the fact that he's like 99% gay and I have no bits he'd be interested in lmao, there's also the fact that this guy owns my heart:

1 Will Franklyn

And not just because we get to see him wet and mostly naked lol. Will is fucking perfect. I would die for this man... because he's already shown that he would die for his love. He almost fucking did, and they weren't even together yet! He's smart and very aware, he's a writer so we'd get to bond/geek out over books together, he's not all full of himself (self-deprecating humor ftw!) and he's willing to help a total stranger despite actual mortal peril, just because it's the right thing to do. Fierce, intelligent, sassy, strong-willed, and a flawless moral compass? YESYESYESYESYES! Forget boyfriend - let me MARRY this man! 😍🥰