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#i do actually . mentally and emotionally ‼️
exileyun · 1 year
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#tags venting btw#ive been feeling kinda down lately like i feel myself become physically mentally and emotionally weaker by the second#yesterday i almost went into a meltdown IN PUBLIC#i dont recall having a meltdown in public like ever. shutdowns yes and many. but meltdowns? mostly in private spaces#since its mostly emotional overload that causes meltdowns on me. it was a nasty experience#and yoongis ongoing tour is making me so exhausted ‼️ please why cant this tour be over like rn#i dont axtually want the tour and yoongis spotlight to be over i just cant bear this . this pain in my chest#im usually so outgoing and annoying about my love for yoongi and its okay because i try to be#but lately even though i love him more than anything#the only thing i feel when i listen to his music deeply is shame. like i dont even deserve to listen to it#im trying okay! im fucking trying! so hard!!!!#and its not working nothing is working i feel so miserable and alone and weak!#and i know i'll keep trying and tomorrow i’ll look at myself and go. it’s not really that bad is it. and i’ll keep living my life as it is.#with a smile as i always do. i love happiness and positivity and smiling and i certainly don’t want to let these bad things affect#me that that much and in general yk .. but i still feel like i need help. like i need peace. i haven’t gotten a minute of peace ever since#the god damn agust d tour started and its because its making me so sad not being able to go it’s making me lose track of my life in general#so now it is not only a ‘oh shoot! i wasnt able to go to agust d concert!’ thing anymore. its my entire life falling apart around me#every detail everything.. and me not being able to get the comfort i seek because the source i usually and mostly get it from is my#special interest. re: bts. re: yoongi. re: agust d tour. and then its a neverending circle#if anyone ever actually does read this i dont think theyll understand much and thats okay#this doesnt make much sense. not even to me in all honesty. i just needed to get this off my chest#this is mostly why i havent been that active these past few days. ive been nose deep into bangtan & sope fics on ao3 because#its the only source i can guarantee ill get serotonin and 'excitedness' (?) from#im trying.. okay.. i swear im trying … and maybe itll be a bit hard for the next month but ill try to help myself and not become ever weaker#than i already feel.#personal
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alexxncl · 2 months
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‼️NIGHTBRINGER HDD CH. 4 SPOILERS‼️
masterlist | events | ch. 3
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do we really not get to kiss them ??? not even during hdd???
...i'm in here complaining like i'm not a lesbian but MY POINT STILL STANDS ‼️
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ofc asmo has something with "aphrodisiac" in the name. like what if it was actually an aphrodisiac ???
ik he wouldn't do anything like that against mc's will but however, in the instance that it was consensual, would your nails even dry fast enough before the shit started to kick in ?? like what if you're too horny to function before the polish dries ??? then what
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imagine being such a bad cook that you fuck up sandwiches. LUNCH. MEAT. SANDWICHES. are you not embarrassed?
also how is mc getting from place to place to place so fast ??? teleportation ???? bc in the og timeline it kinda makes sense, though i feel like they'd be more tired than they are rn. in nb though? it makes no sense at all considering the fact that their powers are consistently weakening. which makes me think that this is either the og timeline or some undisclosed au
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uncontrollably sobs. curls up into a ball and dies. implodes into a black hole.
i love sappy sentimental satan I LOVE CHARACTER GROWTH. the thing is, this can be said about the satan from either timeline. nb satan was more mentally and emotionally unstable, but that doesn't mean satan from the og timeline(s) didn't feel just as isolated as this satan did, if not even more so
imagine still not feeling like you belong after living with your "brothers" for millenia? having to act like you're ok and fine with constant isolation and ostracization from the people you want to love, the people which want to love you, but being unable to find common ground and pushing each other away even more than before
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THEN SAY I LOVE YOU BACK 😐 i hate this man but i also love him but i also hate him but i also. more on this here bc i rambled too much
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i couldn't NOT add my man like c'mon
maybe he clings to them so much because he knows they won't judge him offhandedly like his brothers do? bc they won't assume the worst of him at first glance? idk i feel like, other than the obvious reasons, there's more behind why he busts into mc's room unannounced all the time. being alone with self-deprecating thoughts is hard, and having someone else to fill the silence and the negative space with something positive does help
or maybe i'm reading too far into this and being biased bc thats my man
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even if the throne wasn't based around bloodline, unless they become immortal, they wouldn't be able to be next in line anyways 😭 mc is nawt passing those trials diavolo went through either. no ma'am
the king's crucible ?? is that what it was called ???
honestly i can't lie, mc being the center of the world bc they're the center of the boys' world is cute. corny, but cute
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damn they're that sexy ??? bringing everyone who meets them to their knees
minus luke obv
i wanna meet michael...i'm tryna see sum
and bring god and the demon king down while you're at it too...🫣
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satanicsanity · 1 year
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Hiya!
I've drafted this ask multiple times because I need some comfort, but I wasn't sure how to phrase it, but I think I've got it down now!
Can you do one where the listener feels stuck emotionally in their depressive pattern of thought AND in a situation physically that they can't get out of that isn't bad but isn't seeming good for their mental state, and they call Wally for comfort?
Thank you for doing all my asks. They have helped comfort me a lot. You're a wonderful, sweet human being, and I wish you nothing but the best <3
I'll be honest, I'm also going through it..- whole recording I'd realized I forgot it was supposed to be a call so I apologize for that! I still hope this helps in any way possible!
The quality of the next couple videos is going to be a little low, because my recording space wasn't available! I still hope that this helps somehow, I hope you're all doing as well as as you can be 💕💕💕 (sorry I'm not the best with comfort at times haha)
‼️please go support wally's ACTUAL voice actor, @DaFrankiestein!🩷🩷🩷‼️
The art & characters used are by clown/party coffin!🩷Go support them and donate to their Kofi of you can!
Subtitles, wally speaking: Neighbor?? Neighbor are you in there?? Oh, um.. Hey! You alright?? I-.. I didn't see you out getting your mail this morning... And I asked around, I asked the other neighbors, they hadn't seen you either... I-i just wanted to check in! Make sure you're okay! Are you.. Okay?? It's understandable if you're not... [pause] oh neighbor... No no no, hey hey.. Look at me! Look at me, it is okay... You have nothing to apologize for... You've done nothing wrong. It's okay to feel sad, it's okay to feel down... You're not bothering anyone! Come here come here, let me hold you... [pause] I know just how mean the mind can be sometimes, it can tell you a lot of things that aren't true! Horrible things... You shouldn't listen to them, I know it's hard to ignore them... But they're not true. You are wanted, you are cared for, people want you here! Everything's going to be okay.... You're not a screw up, you're not a mistake... You're not any negative thing. Everything will be okay, everything is going to be alright...
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jihyoruri · 2 months
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me when it’s time for the yearly anon confession potluck and I have to admit that to me… wowyn.. is just.. 🙂. I think she is a little toxic and the wonyn situation takes me out so bad like it’s genuinely the funniest thing to me EVER. like I can not explain why but the wonyoung is like eh ik u like me but I don’t rlly wanna deal with that so! uhm!.. anyway! and wowyn just… listens tew her😭😭like ur telling me wowyn breaks up w girls If wonyoung doesn’t like them LMFAOO😭
idk for some reason wowyn to me is more of a loser than loseryn not even in a mean way just.. I don’t know I feel like if I met her fr I’d be like.. ur such a sad person…
moving past this… who is your favorite yn? we all know mine…
(1. shamelessyn 2. richgirl yn 3. aespayn/firecrackeryn)
i may not be the president of the aespayn or richgirlyn fanclub but I’m actually both of their therapists btw. yeah Ik you guys don’t know but my side gig is actually fixing them. yeah no aespayn is in the trenches… it’s bad in these streets. (I love richgirlyn almost the same amount as shamelessyn I’m a cheater sorry)
also side note I am sat for anything u write but I hope you continue to explore richgirlyn’s dynamic with chaewon and the other members.. idk maybe it’s bc I grew up with a lot of money but the way ppl w wealth act has always been so.. weird tew me. like I know these r just sillay yn works but I feel like people who write rich characters forget like.. these r the most emotionally stunted people on earth. they never learned to socialize or explain their emotions 😭dealing w rich people is insane because no one talks abt anything or knows how to interact with regular people like they have such hard times w it for some reason?? (because they never had to)
ANYWAY sorry for the long ask 😞I hope we get some aespayn fans out here for 4/20 SHOW SUPPORT FOR UR GIRL😭😭
-🎏
LOL babes imma have to correct you on some things. 😭
it’s not that wony is like “eh ik u like me but I don’t rlly wanna deal with that so! uhm!.. anyway!” she’s genuinely playing hard to get with yn, she feels like yn will always wait for her so she just doesn’t want to get into a relationship just as yet, I think I’ve mentioned it in early asks but wonyoung is playing hard to get with yn😭. wonyn is really a sad situation when you think about it because they’d be really good for each other but they’re not on the same page at all like wow!yn doesn’t think wonyoung likes her even tho wony does hold some feelings for her but she’s waiting it out but realizing that her time is running out. The only reason why wow!yn breaks up with people sometimes if wony doesn’t like them because wonyoung is genuinely her best friend if Giselle didn’t like one of yn’s gfs yn would probably break up with them as well, it’s so easy for her do that because she was just bored like she wasn’t in the relationship for real feelings if she acc had real feelings for the person it would be a different story take winter for example BOTH wonyoung and yujin didn’t like her and yn knew that but yn didn’t break up with her because she genuinely liked her but then she realized that she genuinely liked her so she broke up with her LMAOOOOOO. I wouldn’t call wow!yn a loser because she genuinely has problems, she has some mental instability. like her problems with her dad has definitely affected how she thinks about things and butchers how her mind functions in certain situations, she is a sad person tho. ANYWAYS moving on from wow!yn
my favourite yn and wow!yn and nwjns!yn THE SISTERS honestly I love wow!yn because she’s my most complex yn and honestly she’s just such a shit head and it’s so fun and amusing writing her and nwjns!yn is just a sweet mess like when I finally introduced her fic you guys will see what I mean, she’s the exact opposite of her sister 😭 (also a respectful mention of aespa!yn)
LOL they both need therapists for real so you got the job‼️ aespa!yn is a mess she’s a rich mess (I just took in that you like the two extremely rich yn’s LOL also firecracker!yn is always on someone’s favourite list and it always makes me laugh LMAOOO)
yes I am totally gonna explore richgirl!yn more, I tried my best to give a small peak into richgirl!yn having some problems I was so happy when you picked up on it in ur last ask for her
I honestly love long asks so much so this was fun to read LOL and thank you so much for reading and enjoying my works
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sixosix · 6 months
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back by unpopular demand, it's me(that deadman aether anon, that's just my name now i guess)! here to poke the newest chapter a few times until it gives me answers
imma just hit this right off the bat since the chapter just came out- a little crazy? A LITTLE?? man's taking after his 'father' more than he realizes, no wonder he is next in line to be 'king'.
seriously tho, the mental/emotional range lyney has this chapter is wild to me. he's so happy and giddy but even though that doesn't necessarily go away he flips a switch to serious mode when lynette questions him.
he's just?? constantly planning? like here he is, acting almost lovesick over thawed!reader but he keeps hyperfocused on any information she drops to store for later use. worrying over her using her old weapon from her time at the house? already planning on how to get her the perfect weapon as a gift and asks her about childe's methods. 'idle' conversation? instantly mentally notes what topics she is avoiding. she questions him about what the house is doing? i'd bet real money he noted that as well, not to mention wording his answer so that he didn't fully lie to her(after earlier mentioning that she would know if he was lying to her face??? lsafdkjfsa).
Like! Literally, his first words after their little spar date were “She’s hiding something”. sjklsflaljf, like yeah??! She is!!! About a lot of things my guy! Just wait until you get the full picture and not just the flawed info you got right now.
SPEAKING OF WHEN THAT LAST SCENE THO-
Behind Lyney, the moonlight scatters all over. It is a little hard to tell what face he’s making. “I’m doing this exactly because I’m trying not to drive her away.”
This. This snatched my focus. Lyney (and by extension the rest of the fauti trio) are playing chess while Aether and Thawed!Reader are playing checkers!
this is getting long so i'll cut myself off because i know I'm gonna barge in with more random thoughts later- just please know I'm absolutely gonna be re-reading this for the next couple days.
HI DEADMAN AETHER ANON!! always a joy to see u here. that being said,
WHAT THE FUCK!!!! how did u get it so quickly ??? i was literally just talking about it w my friend earlier where i was saying that i wanted lyney to play into the role he said he never wanted 😨‼️ its incredible u got it right off the bat! i thought itd take a few chapters before it sinks in to the readers (including the actual reader)
lyney doesnt bother hiding his expressions w lynette bc she could tell if he plasters on a fake smile anyway—and thats probably way more disturbing for her 😕
yeahh lyney is a bit 😝😝😝😝😝 rn bc lets be real… thawed!lyney and reader are not emotionally stable…… as art naosaki once said in our dms, “Reader needs to learn how to stay and lyney needs to learn how to let go.”
the !!! analogy!!! thats so genius!! i love that :D
thank you somuch once again for sharing your thoughts!!! its like meeting someone on the same wavelength as me!!!!! its so cool to read what u have to say
CANT WAIT FOR MORE OF UR WONDERFUL THOUGHTS!!! ❤️❤️❤️ your observations are OUTSTANDING as always
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theyluvlyss · 18 days
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It’s been a month already… 😭 well another check up! How have you been? 😊
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𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨...!! (tw: may be some touchy subjects/words in this for readers, so caution is advised. ig this doubles as a small rant/vent)
I'm gonna take this as an opportunity to fully apologize for my unexpected/unannounced hiatus. it's actually been a very rough set of months, and I really am trying to get past it. in short, I've lost some family, have been trying to set up a stable (and not mentally/emotionally draining💀✋🏽) environment for me to stay in and/or find a job, and possibly aim for a chance at getting back in school or learning to hone in on some skills that could up my advantages in getting myself ... unstuck, I guess you could say?
all in all,,, it's looking grim fr ngl💀.
but, it's not in my best interest to dwell on it. I can only take/deal with so much before I realize I need an escape or a recluse, and honestly, this account allows me to do that. with or without an audience, I continue to post/write because it's something I genuinely enjoy. I love being able to focus my attention on my special interests and while a lot of the times, my mental state or my outside struggles gets in the way of that, I still persist because without this one joy, this one thing no one can take from me,,, idk I might as well not be here lmao.
I don't mean to rant/vent any further, but for those asking (ty, lovely anon, for checking in♡), I'd thought I'd shed a little light on my situation, and I truly encourage everyone who sees this to be kind when give the opportunity.
you never know what someone else is going through, what's actually going through their heads, what they're contemplating, and what they're dealing with. if you can't do it because you just want to be a decent human being and want to make someone's day, at least do it because you don't want to be the cause of something tragic that's undoable :/.
with that being said, if you feel there's no one on this earth who doesn't love you, it must mean I've died because I love you. as long as I'm here, you will always have someone you can chat/vent/rant to, make friends with, and search for whatever support you need :). I am here for you, even as just one person♡.
~ lyssa💞
*ahem* anyways back to my fanfic author fangirl shifter autism adhd induced bullshit😻‼️... (which reminds me, I really am going to try to repost stuff more often and post other things than just writing, idk why I'm so bad at that💀).
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toffeechad · 11 months
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Since most of you voted the yes option, I think now's the time I'll show more info about my Spidersonas from Earth-2763! (Stuff related to TPOT 6 spoilers can be found in the bottom, you've been warned!)
Who are they, actually?
These characters are actually Pen, Eraser, Golf Ball, Tennis Ball, Fries, Puffball & TV from a popular internet show called Battle For Dream Island.
(they're basically meant to be born as sentient objects but uh i'm gonna exclude puffball because she's actually one of these specimens in goiky and is not based on an actual existing object, NOT EVEN BASED ON A POM-POM EITHER)
Where do they live in?
Goiky, in Earth-2763, of course. They live in an alternate universe of Battle For Dream Island where almost everything is the same, except there is a moment that takes place after TPOT 1 offscreen that shows the entirety of Are You Okay's team members suddenly getting their Spidey-Senses tingling. Another difference to this alternate universe is that it's also connected to other object shows such as Inanimate Insanity, ONE, AIB, BFTROR, Brawl Of The Objects, MOSS, TDOS, etc.
Do the team members other than Pen really have legal names? (specifically, Pen's legal name is confirmed to be Ben as shown in BFB 4)
Yep! Here's the list of actual names for the other team members!
Eraser - Edgar
Golf Ball - Gertrude
Tennis Ball - Tanner
Fries - Fred
Puffball - Priscilla
TV - Trevor
How did they get their powers?
The rest of the members were bitten by a radioactive bug, but TV was instead hijacked by a virus. TV also got extra eyes on his screen as a side effect from his virus that can be shown or hidden whenever he wants to.
When did they get their powers?
Somewhere between the aftermath of Tpot 1 and before Tpot 2.
Do they mature by losing their respective Uncle Ben?
No, but they do mature by witnessing eliminations and traumatic events in the current season they're competing in because recovery exists in their world. Eliminations count as their canon events, and after all, it shall not be allowed to be messed around with. Expect some team members progressively losing a part of their personalities as they mature once they get seperated until the end of TPOT.
So, here's an angsty canon event aftermath scenario that supposedly takes place in the same area where the Spider Society live in. After TPOT 6, Pen's proud with the amount of votes he had compared to everyone else until he was interrupted by someone that withnessed their own "canon event." It was Fries, who is along with his best friend, Puffball. He told Pen that he wasn't paying attention to how petrified and devastated he was in that so-called "unfair" elimination. Although Golf Ball approves Miguel O' Hara's philosophy of canon events such as eliminations and trauma as a method to discipline some of her team members for her dimension, both Tennis Ball and Eraser are quite concerned about this. Thus, that's how Fries and Puffball were the first batch of the crew to get canon events maturing their personalities. (Fries eventually loses his intentions of causing mischief as he's now more serious, emotionally strained and depressed, and Puffball eventually loses her self-indulgence as she's now moody, barely carefree and not selfish anymore. However, the duo will only have the urge to snap if they feel like they want to.)
Pros: they kinda behaved
Cons: they ain't even the same as themselves last time and their seperation from one another during TPOT 6 inflicted them with the canon event rizz
(OH WOE IS ME, SOMEONE TAKE THEM TO A THERAPY SESSION, PLEASE!)
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Does anyone in the group have disabilities?
Golf Ball and Tennis Ball are born with an armless disability, Puffball's basically a specimen in Goiky that is meant to be born limbless, but all of the team's members share the same mental disability that is Autism. (GOOD MORNING AUTISTIC SPIDERSONA NATION, RISE AND GRIND‼️)
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What does Flocculent Spider's icon actually look like?
It looks like this, and it's rainbow colored because of the inclusion of a holographic pattern on it. The spider icon of hers is located at the back of her mask. (If you're curious about what her mask looks like, you're gonna have to peek at that link I attached at the title of the post, right at the beginning of this.)
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Do they fight antagonists?
Of course! If there's a Spider-Man, then there's atleast gotta be an introduction to an antagonist! I'm probably planning to interpret Steve Cobs as Doc Ock in Earth-2763, but I haven't got any ideas for the rest of the other antagonists, so feel free to drop down suggestions for the concepts of the other antagonists of Earth-2763 if you like!
When was the first time they finally fought an antagonist?
At the day when the contestants and the hosts of BFDI & II had a reunion at Gelatin's Steakhouse while celebrating Gelatin's 10th birthday, someone seems to have destroyed a part of the steakhouse's wall... and he's actually targeting MePhone. It was Steve Cobs, aka the "Doc Ock" of Earth-2763. As it was finally the time for Golf Ball and her teammates to have an opportunity to fight crime, Golf Ball and her teammates eventually put on their masks and suits and proceeded to fight against Steve Cobs without any hesitation. After defeating Steve Cobs, TV wrangles Cobs up with a web that electrocutes on TV's command while Cobs is distracted and disturbed with Pen telling him a joke. As Pen mentions that he's "the one who knocks," TV then successfully electrocutes Cobs after his defeat. MePhone thanked Golf Ball along with her teammates for saving him from his reckoning, and then the rest of the contestants and hosts cheered for them. (friendly reminder that i actually suck at writing lmfao) Even if Golf Ball and her team are actual web-slinging heroes, they still prefer to do challenges normally to abide with challenge rules for some reason.
Fun fact: II Taco is actually uninvited to Gelatin's birthday
Even if Earth-2763 Fries is actually eliminated, is he still allowed to meet the Spider-Society though?
Yes, Two actually allowed him to meet the Spider Society whenever he wants to. However, Fries prefers to stay back inside the hotel atleast 2 weeks before another contest begins in his world for a fair reason. Same thing would apply to Earth-2763 Puffball as well.
Is there any instances of Earth-2763 Puffball having the colorful quills on her mask hidden?
Yes, she can retract her mask's quills whenever she wants. However, if she's pissed or battle-ready, her quills will extend! Example: Before she snaps, she hides her quills. Whenever she's ready to snap and be feisty, her quills extend in length.
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gamerbearmira · 2 years
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Oh my god, the attention! *drowns from attention overload*
As Mira is being passed around to each family member, they notice that she does one thing to all members besides her sisters: she holds the person's face, stares at them for a bit, then pats them on the cheek twice and lets out an approving babble then relaxes back in that person's hold.
She just finished that ritual with her Tio Bruno when Tio Felix jokingly says, "And the little senorita has deemed Bruno worthy of holding her."
That gets a chuckle out of everyone, but were then surprised by Mira looking at him and giving an affirmative "Gah."
Seems like she agrees with her Tio.
Dolores looks at her Abuela. "Can we all have a sleepover in my room, please? I don't want to sleep alone tonight."
Abuela smiles as she nods her head. "Yes, I think that's a great idea. No one should be alone after tonight's events. You children get changed in your night clothes while us adults gather what we'd need for it."
Dolores lets out a quiet squeak and drags her primas out of Abuela's room. Once the kids are out, however, Alma turns to the adults. "Tomorrow, things will change around here."
Bruno looks at his Mama while adjusting his hold on tiny so so tiny Mirabel. "What do you mean, Mama?"
Alma sighed as she looks at her trip- twins. Oh yeah, they're twins now. "I mean, after the accident, after encountering that lazy excuse of a farmer, I can finally see how much I have hurt this family."
Bruno and Pepa looked at each other, then at Alma. "Mama, it's okay. You didn't-"
"But I should have!" She interrupted. "I should have known to put mi familia before the community, before the Miracle." She sighs. "But I didn't. And now, because of my actions, my daughter, your triplet, is dead. And her little miracle baby won't know the amazing woman that is her mother." She says while gently stroking her hand on Mirabel's head. "I can't even imagine how much worse the two of you have had. Especially you, my Brunito." She caresses Bruno's cheek, which he leans into. "So, tomorrow, I will tell the town that we won't be available for the week, so we can prepare for the funeral and grieve. And during that time, I want you two to tell me everything that happened while you were growing up, everything about your powers, and how you want to help the Encanto. Even if it's only from Casita and you never set foot in town again." Alma said with a serious but loving look on her face.
Bruno and Pepa were both crying but still smiling. They finally will have their mother's full support on how they want to use their powers and shoulder to cry about EVERY SINGLE BAD THING THAT HAPPENED TO THEM! "Thank you, Mama."
Alma smiled as she hugged her ninos and nieta. Starting tomorrow, the family will finally begin to heal.
And Mirabel was gumming her Tio's ruana.
LETS GOOOOOOOO ALMA FIXING HER FAMILY‼️‼️‼️
Love that Abuela is actually trying now <3 I know that after the incident, she realized just how much she out her family through and genuinely wants to fix what she did. I doubt she’ll ever let it happen again, because she’s lost too many for it. I think she’d definitely listen to them and genuinely try to make an effort in improving their lives, mentally and emotionally.
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paperboy-pb · 1 year
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i just wanted to say that i’m so incredibly happy to see a comic that talks about special ed, i spend my entire late childhood to preteen-hood in the sped department, most of the staff members who would follow me around would physically and emotionally abuse me, i ended up having to be homeschooled and developed all sorts of mental issues as a result, and it took me years to heal from everything, i’m still working through my mental health, and knowing that i’m not the only person who went through this makes me super happy
...Makes me happy too :]
I wish you the best! It's true-- we really aren't alone. Even when it seems it. When I was a kid in the 2010s, I used to google "help, special ed makes me feel bad" or "special ed makes me sad" and I wouldn't be able to find anything except articles about how 'wonderful' of an environment it is, & why you should put your kids in there if you can. I thought I was going nuts for a while.
Kid-me felt so alone, I actually started Paperboy *as a child*, as a last-ditch way to cope. Summer between sixth and seventh grade, I would draw out all the terrible things that happened to my peers & I, but with different names and faces. In a little blue notebook. And I never stopped. Thank God other people are more vocal about it today, though. I don't want to be the only person who talks about this.
‼️[Heads up-- vague discussion of ableist abuse against a child & SA going onward!]‼️
I was in it for K-8, so ages 4-13. I was never hit by adults, but the emotional abuse & isolation ran so rampant that by 5, I was asking teachers, "Am I *good enough* to play with other kids yet? :D"
Needless to say, I was always noted to have self-esteem issues. (And staff had the audacity to wonder why?)
I'm so sorry, anon. Kids like you & me went through way too much. I remember it all: the screaming, the following, intimidation, condescension, EXTREME public humiliation, force-feeding, isolation, disabled kids bullying each other, botched education, violent situations, some times where I genuinely almost died, and then... well. I was sexually abused while I was in there, to say the least. And nobody would let me separate from the people who did it because the school insisted on keeping all their "special little things" together, away from everybody else. So I had to just... stay there. And take it. For months on end.
An adult even saw it one day. You could tell I was in trouble, I even screamed, "HELP ME!" at the top of my lungs. She looked right at me, straight-up eye contact, but... she turned her back. To talk to some General Ed kids on the other end of the recess yard.
Normal talk, too. She didn't send the girls to get help or anything. They had a pleasant little chat while I had the worst moment of my life.
I haven't healed up fully, but I'm doing... better? Working on Paperboy helps! My family wouldn't help me, but I did well enough that I got to be transferred out into General Ed at 13. And I got a therapist helping me out now at 19. But that environment genuinely took my entire childhood away from me; and that sucks! 4 is pretty much a toddler. 13 is a teenager already.
I will never understand why people think disabled students are to be treated like nothing. Special Ed & many of the people involved in it have some serious reform to do.
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k0kichiimagines · 2 years
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he's so beautiful hes so pretty and handsome and lovely and kind and sweet and funny and brave and kissable and marryable actual love of my life i am obsessed i am head over heals in love my darling my love my sweetheart my precious saeran mwah
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levishousewife · 3 years
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Some random Levi fluff..just random scenarios and thoughts that were on my mind.
Does get kind of suggestive but nothing too bad
‼️MINORS DNI‼️
- Levi would be cuddling with you in bed and when you’re pulling up the sheets and getting ready to cuddle into his chest he’d be looking at you with so much love and admiration thinking he’s so lucky to have you and how grateful he is to have you in his life.
- While y’all are watching movies he would definitely be the one to hold the popcorn bowl and have all your fav candies all ready and opened up for you so you don’t have to be all distracted from the movie trying to open up the noisy candy wrappers.
- Continuing the movie scenario..it would be an at home late at night movie date he’d be in his all gray pjs and y’all are sitting on the couch while watching some random romance movie y’all saw on Netflix and he’d have his arm draped over you and his feet kicked up on the coffee table while you cuddled into his side and ate from the popcorn bowl that was placed in his lap and sometimes he’d tilt his head to lay on top of your head if he just wanted more contact from you or his neck was just hurting
- He’d be the one to do your laundry even though you insist on doing it yourself. Levi grew up in a very unclean environment which is why he takes cleanliness very very seriously and he doesn’t want the person he loves the most to feel like shit bcs their clothes aren’t clean and/or doesn’t smell nice bcs.. well.. he knows how shitty of a feeling that is...so he takes that extra stress off your shoulders and cleans and folds your laundry for you. You’d never have a wrinkle in your clothes
- Levi loves big fluffy covers bcs it somehow makes him feel like he’s trapped in a whole other comfy warm world with the love of his life..even though he never really sleeps due to insomnia, the bed is one of his favorite places bcs you’re there with him in such a peaceful quiet state and he gets to watch you peacefully sleep. He’s happy that you feel comfortable enough to sleep with him.
- He’d never really play video games I don’t think unless it’s like little phone games but if it’s a game you really like and enjoy he’d be down to try it bcs you like it..and since you like it..it must be a good game he’d sound like he hated the idea of playing a video game with you at first he’d sigh a lot, “dude I’m not playing this shit it looks like a baby game” but deep down inside..hes been wanting to play it and spend time with you
- He’d always keep your shampoo/conditioner and just bathroom essentials stocked up. He’d never want you to worry about running out of your fav conditioner.
- He’d love more powdery or soapy scents on you cause it smells clean to him and that makes him happy and just makes you seem so elegant to him
- I feel like you wearing rings or just any sort of jewelry..specifically sliver jewelry would make him melt..idk why he just thinks you look absolutely stunning with jewelry on. He definitely get you some diamond earrings or necklaces.
- Your wedding ring would be very simple neat and clean looking nothing big or extravagant. Would probably end up getting those rubber wedding bands bcs he uses his hands a lot for work and he’d literally off himself if he’d ever lose or break his actual wedding band.
- I think y’all would have a black or gray cat or a French bulldog
- I don’t think he’d want kids (which is perfect imo lol) he knows and has come to terms with the fact that he has way too much trauma
- Your sense of fashion would definitely influence his sense of fashion vic versa
- Would laugh at you when you rage while playing games he thinks it’s cute but he would also think wow..you’re kinda hot..
- I don’t think he’s a hard dom..never thought he was and cant picture him being one with you he’s either a soft dom or a switch (isayma said he’s a sun though Ik) cant change my mind he’d never want to hurt you it any sort of way unless you tell him to be a little more rough
- Aftercare is insanely important to him and he always makes sure you’re physically mentally and emotionally okay after
- Doesn’t get too jealous but is kind of overprotective but nothing crazy
- Communication is hard for him definitely.. that area in your relationship will need ALOT of work and an insane amount of understanding cause this man has been through a lot.. but he’s truly trying his hardest
- Does cry but not often, will only cry around you and will also cry when you cry bcs seeing you cry hurts him more than anything in the world.
- Will always be the one to do the cooking and cleaning cause he wants it done a certain way cause yk..Levi’s way is the best way...but he really loves when you just chill in the kitchen with him on your little step stool the two of you use to get the brown sugar off the top shelf for your weekly cookie baking and y’all just talk about dumb shit or whatever is on your mind. Also I’m in full support of the Levi male wife agenda.
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beanst0ck · 4 years
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18. “ It’s not bad to cry. In fact, I think it makes a person stronger. “ requested by @katthestupidwizard​ from this prompt list
at first i liked how it was coming out but then i was like ‘ ehhhh, no ‘ so i plan on rewriting this because i actually liked where it was going before i messed it up
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Pairing: Inosuke x Reader
Unedited
Word count: 1294
‼️MANGA SPOILERS‼️
You were just a young girl when you witnessed your first demon attack.
Growing up you were quite a sensitive child. You cried a lot, which led to some of the neighbor's kids picking on you. Luckily for you your big brother was always there to protect you.
He always did, even as the demon ate him alive.
No one was spared that day, no traces of your family could be found. All that was left was the blood stained floorboards to remind you of what happened.
It was the middle of the night and you were sleeping soundlessly, having such a nice dream. Bright and lively colors surrounded you as you saw your family waving at you to join them over on a grassy hill. Just as you were about to jump into your mother's embrace you awoke to your older brother harshly nudging you. " (Y/n)! Go hide in the closet now! And don't come out! " He pushed you into a closet and shut the doors fast.
" Wha- (B/n)? What's going on? " You gently pushed one of the doors open only for it to be pushed back into place by your brother's body.
" I said stay!- " He didn't get to finish his sentence as he began choking on his blood.
The muffled sound of skin being ripped apart managed to enter through the closet door and reach your ears. Slowly once again, you pushed the door open. " (B/n)?.. "
Your brother had been dragged to the center of the room, body laying lifelessly on the floor as blood leaked out of the big wound on his chest. There was someone squatting in front of him. Their pale blonde hair spiking out of its spiral shape as it rested on his back. Once the stranger heard your soft voice he turned his head.
You gasped, taking a step back. Blood decorated the corners of his mouth as he gave you a toothy grin. " Oh? It seems that I missed someone! " He adjusted his crownlike hat.
You didn't move, you didn't scream, you couldn't do anything but stare as tears rolled down your cheeks.
It was only when you realized the threat that you got up and ran out of the room as quickly as you could. The demon stared at you surprisingly, " There's no reason for you to run! I can ease your suffering! " he followed you.
You ran out of your house. Where were you going? Far far away from that thing that just slaughtered your family. As you ran you didn't look where you were going and ran into a tree. At least, you thought it was a tree. You looked up to see the sky had turned a lighter shade of blue, meaning the sun was coming up. A hand rested itself on your shoulder and you flinched away. " Please don't eat me! " you cried, scooting backwards while covered your face, trembling as you had backed yourself into a tree.
" I'm not going to eat you, but where did you come from? "
You lowered your hands and barely managed to see the girl that stood in front of you through all your tears. She had long black hair, two big butterfly hairpins resting on the sides of her head, and a soft smile adorned her face. She squatted in front of you, " What did you see? "
You hesitated for a moment. " H-He killed them... my mother, father, brother... he killed them all! " you dug your hands into the dirt. Your tears would just not stop falling, no matter how hard to tried to contain them.
The woman nodded and asked you to lead her back to your home. When you had arrived, she searched through the home and found nothing but bloody rooms and broken objects. The demon had left before the sun could reach him.
The woman stepped outside and saw you on the floor. She couldn't see your face, but she could hear your sniffles. You didn't care if your knees got dirty from sitting on the dirt, you didn't care about anything.
When she got closer to you the look of despair was clearly written on your face. Tears continuously streamed down your face and the woman wore a sad smile on her face. She understood what you were going through. " What's your name? " she asked.
You hesitated for a moment before letting out a mumbled, " (Y/n).. "
She smiled, you liked her smile. Her smile made you feel safe and secure, almost as if she was telling you everything was going to be ok. " It's nice to meet you (Y/n), my name is Kanae. Would you like to come back home with me? " She extended her hand towards you in hopes that you'd accept her offer.
You looked up at her. You had no where else to go, but your mother had taught you to never trust strangers. You placed your small hand in hers and you two walked off, away from your old home. You didn't care if the woman ended up killing you.
You'd be thankful, she'd return you back to your family.
.
.
.
Over the years the Kocho sisters accepted you into their family. You and Kanao trained together with the help of Kanae and quickly learned your breath styles.
When Shinobu told you the news of Kanae's passing and who caused it, you broke down into tears once again. You felt angry that the same demon who killed your family was trying to take your new one away. It wasn't fair, couldn't you just live a normal life?
You and Kanao stood behind as Shinobu comforted Sumi, Kiyo, and Naho. Clenching you're fists in anger you swore to avenge Kanae, you were going to kill that demon.
You didn't think the moment would come so soon.
Muzan had finally made his move and attacked. You had entered a room to see Doma absorbing Shinobu, almost making you lose all hope of ever rebuilding your family. Later Inosuke had joined the battle- falling through the ceiling- saving you and Kano from an attack. Doma seemed to recognize Inosuke's pretty face, revealing that he was the one that killed his mother.
Currently, all three of you were dealing with the aftermath of the fight emotionally and mentally. Kanao was clutching Shinobu's butterfly hairpin in her hands while Inosuke was furiously rubbing his tears away, not wanting anyone to see. You just sat on your knees, except this time no tears were falling.
All you could think about was how most of your family was now gone, all because of that stupid demon's fault. You swore in that moment you felt a sudden warmth embrace you. When you looked up you were in that same field you were in during your dream. You saw your family waving at you before fading away. They were finally at peace knowing that you were going to be alright.
You noticed Kanao had calmed down and was beginning to gather her things while Inosuke still looked heartbroken. It was understandable, after fifteen years he finally found out he had a mom, only to realize it had been snatched right out of his grasp. You placed a hand on his shoulder, startling him. " Dammit, why am I so weak? " He spoke out in a broken aggressive tone.
"It's not bad to cry. In fact, I think it makes a person stronger." You embraced him, hoping to make him feel better.
This was the first time you'd seen Inosuke so vulnerable, and you felt bad. He wrapped his arms around you while clutching your demon slayer uniform, hiding his face in your shoulder. He continued to cry and you let him because you knew the feeling all too well.
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honeymoonjin · 4 years
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pre-elimination thoughts
hello here is a compiled list of all the asks i woke up to this morning relating to the elimination ksdjfks please enjoy 
If u see it from the pov of yn like actually that the person yn said “lets vote kook off after he shared his feelings and got provoked abt it” thats gonna hurt koo so much and he probably will completely shut himself off/ maybe even ask to leave the house if sora allows that?😳 and for yall b’s to vote him off!!! I’ll never forgive yall if sora announces that he got voted off fr fr!!!
Listen I’m not trying to be hateful but what did tae give us this week in comparison to JK??? Did he give us a whole scene? did he take the time to set up the gym into an exam room? Give us a sexy doctor moment?? No. He gave us some relatively mild puppy play which is fine!! But i mean compared to everyone else’s scene?? JK needs his moment, needs US on his side! Tae will still have jimin if he gets eliminated but koo needs a moment to shine! #byetae #savejk
I just remembered the elimination is based on sex...i voted the wrong person😞
why are people kicking off hoseok what did my man do
I’m gonna day this once. Vote koo out and I’m coming for kneecaps. There is so much potential there with the Maknae line. Listen hear me out the candidate that would hurt the least is hobi I know he was gonna get booted last week but like he’s the one that is the least emotionally attached to yn ya feel?! And also I feel like this opens up opportunities for him to dick down other members…. not naming names but *cough* jimin *cough* anyways that’s my tea if Jungkook is booted this week Readers …. I’m cracking my knuckles and we’re fucking throwing hands accept there won’t be a Seokjin and Yoongi to hold me back when I push y’all on a coffee table 😤😤🥱🥱👊🏾👊🏾
jimin may of instigated the fight, but jungkook threw the first punch and to me that’s a lot worse
the way it just took me five minutes to vote 💀 and 4 minutes and 55 seconds of those 5, i was just staring at my wall contemplating
Let's try and think with the few braincells we have left fam. Hoseok scenes are the most fun to read bc he is extremely confident and also one of the most experienced in the house. DON'T VOTE HIM OUT. A lot of the others could have a great storyline just hanging out in the house and creating sexual tension and drama. HOSEOK SHINES WHEN HE'S PERFORMING AND BEING A HARD ASS CONFINDENT SEXY DOM. PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU DON'T VOTE HIM OUT JUST YET.
i swear to fucking god i y'all vote hoseok out i'm rioting
People out here fighting for who should get eliminated but I'm here cant even figure out who to vote for cause I love all of them so much,,,, BUT IF ANYONE EVEN COMES NEAR MY BABY JIMIN AND YOONGI AND KOO IM KILLING ON SIGHT -jimin slap me anon
Ngl y’all wish I could vote y/n out 😂😂😂 girl gets into a relationship on a porn show... with 2 guys she doesn’t really seem to even like that much in a romantic way. Idk I’m fine with vmin but I don’t like the poly :/ not because it’s poly just because it doesn’t make sense + it’s complicating a lot of shit. I love the story though so I’m gonna keep reading it I just don’t agree with the relationship. I don’t think she should have a relationship with any of them until the show is over
Aaah this chapter was so good but also a mess 😭 I literally don’t know who to choose, I would actually be the worst in such a situation because I hate making decisions like that! I‘m seeing all those aggressive asks you’re getting and I‘m just sitting in the corner over here instead trying to deal with emotions 🥺 I just hope they’re all going to be alright in the end!!
I sent u two asks already queen and it def shows what good of a job you've done but this time let me be selfish for a second Because these anons are pissing me OFF! I can't believe so many people are in favour of voting Taekook out bro I'm really gonna pull a Kook and fight yall in the living room like UR really gonna break their hearts like that? JKS gonna blame himself for opening up and Tae will be devastated that he cant touch MC since touch is one of his love languages! Yall make Me SIQUE!
im voting tae out bc imo his scene was v plain. I get that pet play is out there n kinky but it was boring. While the hopekook scene with y/n was explosive it felt like tae having jimin there for his scene was a cop out. n then they did their dumb poly thing which should honestly be against the rules. WHAT SNAKES! also ngl but i feel like jimins been such a b to hopekook all the time FOR WHAT! im voting out tae for this week n jimin after. VMIN CAN GO FUCK EACH OTHER IN THE BUNKS FOR ALL OF TIME
Please please please don’t throw JK under the bus, if he gets eliminated his mental state is going to crumble even more than it already did, poor baby boy doesn’t deserve to get eliminated specially if we vote solely on the sex, because this man really went all out with his prompt, he was so diligent with staying in character and all, AND come on y’all did you not read the part in which he was being taken out crying while saying how sorry he was for the mess? We can’t break his heart even more
#kickjk2020 vminy/n for the win ‼️😼
Okay I’m sorry for yelling in my last ask BUT I’d be lying if I said I couldn’t relate to the way jk reacted bc I’d definitely feel the same as him that, doesn’t make the actions he took right but I mean have y’all really never felt that upset and alone before? You’re up against a wall with no where to go dude. Ofc you’re gonna lash out. His prompt was AMAZING he put in so much effort and it was SPICEY. And he felt so apologetic after the fight. He needs more time please:(((( #SaveJungkook
Ok but what i think some of us don’t get is that the elimination vote is from Y/N’s perspective, right? So how in the world will that go down? After all this, her voting Jk off. So, what i’m saying is #saveSora and #savejk
that chapter was so emotionally exhausting 😓 you’re such a great writer but it breaks my heart nonetheless. I guess that’s all I have to say about the chapter. but as far as voting, my choices are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. cause one I want to vote out based off of sex, and the other strictly based on emotion. uugh I can’t decide (even though I know you want it based on sex). my final statement I’ll campaign for is PLEASE don’t vote out jin or joon 🥺 #savejin&joon
I see ask about voting my man Jimin or sweet baby boy jk and even sweet taetae out while I'm here wondering if we can veto yn out 😔 i get her pov but damn im really pissed that she just gets "plant mode on" in situations like this
I’m so sorry for my baby but Tae is the one who has to go, c’mon everyone he is the safest option! He will still have Jimin and he can still have fun with the rest of the gentlemen, and you can’t tell me that he wouldn’t enjoy just watching and/ or punishing y/n when she decides that she can’t keep her hands to herself, HE WOULD STILL BE ABLE TO ENJOY BEING ON THE SHOW WITHOUT THE SEX WITH Y/N BECAUSE WE’VE SEEN HIM ENJOY SEXY TIMES WITH THE OTHER GENTLEMEN! HE CAN STILL BE HAPPY IF HE GOES
If koo gets voted off I'm actually going to c r y just-
if y’all vote my baby koo out i will personally hunt you down and crack your spine like a fucking glowstick xx
PEOPLE DONT VOTE KOOK OFF. HE LET OFF SOME STEAM NOW ALL WE NEED IS FOR HIM TO APOLOGIZE AND MAKE THINGS RIGHT 😭
PLEASE DONT HURT KOO IM LEAVE THE BABY ALONE OKAY???:(((((((
#SAVEYOONGI WE GOT THE TINIEST CRUMB OF HIS FEELINGS ON THE COUCH WITH Y/N THE NIGHT OF THE THREESOME AND I WANT THOSE FEELINGS TO FLOURISH 👁️👁️
i’m sorry but if we’re voting by who did they prompt the worst you have got to choose seokjin. i feel so bad for him because the thing ab his feelings just came out but the most interesting scene he’s had up until now was the threesome with yoongi. if i could, everyone would keep participating but in this moment, seokjins the obvious choice to me
luckily it wasn’t as many as i thought but still fsdjfkjks phew yall are passionate ;;-;
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imagineredwood · 7 years
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‼️Trigger warning for talk about weight and insecurities. This is just me getting some stuff off of my chest and letting you guys have a little look into my personal life. By all means, skip this post if you think it will upset you or make you feel some type of way‼️ Well, I did a thing today 😳 I signed up for Planet Fitness and I have to say, I'm pretty excited. After officially finishing Nursing school yesterday, I realized that now with actual time to spend on myself and not constant studying, it was time to make a change. I've always struggled with my weight. And by struggled, I mean mentally and emotionally, because physically I've always been a big girl and my body ain't never had a problem keeping up with that 😂 I have a hormone imbalance and mild insulin resistance due to what my doctor is almost sure to be PCOS, and weight has always been a hard topic for me. I'm confident in my personality and in who I am. I'm confident in what I make of my life and my place in other people's lives, but I've never been confident in how I look. Maybe only from the neck up, and from certain angles. That was just something I thought I'd have to live with. A lot of the other issues I have, stem from my insecurity with my body and today I decided that enough is enough. Just because it's gonna be hard, doesn't mean I shouldn't try. I'll tell y'all right now, ya girl ain't never gonna have a thigh gap or a perfectly flat tummy. Those just ain't qualities that I'm gonna have 😂 I know that. But that doesn't mean that I should just lay here sulking and having a pity party when it's something that I can change. I've never been skinny and as far as I'm concerned, I don't think I ever will be. But one thing that I do know for sure is that where I am now isn't healthy and it's not where I want to be. I don't have any health problems; yet. But I know that being overweight can definitely change that though and I just really want to improve the quality of my life. This was a big step for me to make and thankfully I've made some of the best friends of my life in this nursing program that have joined with me and are going to be there right along side me. I guess I'm telling you guys all this because I want you to know the truth. I want you to know me. As a person, not just as a writer. Know that I'm not perfect. Know that I'm not without flaws. Know that I'm not always confident. Know that I struggle with things just like the rest of you do. This is gonna be one hell of a journey I'm sure and as my family, I figured I wanted to include you all in that ❤️
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