I can't stop wondering if angels or demons would even kiss
Is that something they do?
I've seen people comment that the Aziraphale Crowley kiss looks kinda stiff and awkward but I think that makes it better
Neither of them have ever kissed before
It's a human thing to do
It just feels right that in a moment of pure emotion and desperation, Crowley would do something so human
A kiss that carries the weight of all the time they spent together on earth, not in heaven, not in hell, just the pair of them, on their own side
"when you're gone, remember us, remember how we could have been different"
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just woke up from a baby dream and I'm a sobbing wreck :) anyway Logan Huntzberger doesn't expect much from his future besides monetary success, partying, and a lot lot lot of sex. he definitley doesn't expect to look up one day and realize he's sharing a home, a life with someone. not only that, but he's the one that instigated it. he told you in college he didn't like you being around other guys. he stopped caring about the girls that he would go between, because now he just seems to care about you. everything else falls to the sidelines. so he comes back to his big fancy house after an important business meeting on the golf course, and he sees you there. some old sitcom is marathoning on tv, and you're wrapped up in fluffy blankets, hair up and out of your face. you look so cozy, so comfortable. you keep adjusting the blankets, fussing with them as you hum softly. he walks closer, overcome with a feeling of love and swelling pride and... paternal instinct he's never felt. your son Henry, just a month or two old is bundled on your arms. you look up at Logan and smile so warmly he could cry just from the look on your face when you see him.
"hi," you breathe softly. Henry's settled down, so you don't want to rile him up too much, but he's not all the way asleep.
"hey ace," he breaths, sitting next to you. he wraps you in his arms and kisses you, meeting forgotten as you both admire you baby boy together. you rub his tummy gently, soothingly, and Logan smooths his hair. it's short and fuzzy, and a little prickly. it makes him laugh softly. Henry is wearing the white and blue onesie Honor got for him at the baby shower. he makes a mental note to take some pictures to send her of him wearing it. the soft fabric of his polo shirt and the smell of his cologne mixed with the distinct remnants of golf course air is so comforting. he watches you admire your son, trace the shape of his cute little nose, copy the faces he makes, babble little noises at him. he watches you smooth his hair and help him get comfortable in your arms, watches you place your finger in his hand so he can hold onto it with that surprisingly strong baby death grip. Henry wiggles around, getting comfortable in your arms, and you kiss his forehead again. once you're sure that he's settled, not too warm and not too cold, comfortable and lying safely, you can finally relax. you rest your head on Logan's shoulder, closing your eyes and finally letting yourself relax and rest a little. you take in a big deep breath of his masculine scent, somehow both spicy and refreshing, and sigh. you're content. you're more than content, he realizes. you're happy. Logan... made you happy. he found out what you wanted and built you a life you want, a life he wants. it hits him like a ton of bricks in one overwhelming, amazing moment, and he soaks in the feeling, watching the way your sleeping babys face and yours mirror each other.
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Having a bit of a headache rn ... so I'm gonna just ramble about a thang. I'm very loose with my gender/sexuality hcs for the guys barring the few that take up my brain a lot more. For Phoenix (clarifications: my peenix at least), I have a hard time nailing their gender identity down. Probably something as simple as queer or unlabeled. But what I was sure of, was that they're like. polyam bisexual grey/demiromantic? Like they're a MASSIVE flirt, and they do find a lot of people attractive ... but i think for the most part, when all you meet are your enemies, I feel like it's a comedic bit for them more than anything. They're not expecting anything to come out of it.
When something does come out of it, Phoenix is... pleasantly surprised! Especially in a career as dangerous as this one, they'd have to be aware of the risks with having a spy as a partner. Phoenix hasn't really had a somewhat stable relationship ever since they became an agent...but hey, if they're understanding, Phoenix welcomes them with gusto. Just that. the romantic feelings take a teeensy bit longer to develop on their end. However at that point I think Phoenix would've already accepted them as a really good friend that they love. And I think I really need to make that a bit clearer.................. no big reason in particular I just get shipbrainrot quite often. Which is fun!!!!!!!!!!!!! But me friendships. the friendships..
With Phoenix I feel like the lines between platonic and romantic affection blur and they don't really care much to give distinction to them. I try to make it in my recent ship asks that all Phoenix does in there are something they'd do for a friend. Bestie in question being Prism for those examples. Had an idea that they like to kiss Reggie on the cheek when they're elated (and Reggie ofc agreed to this beforehand). Juniper fell first, but it was nice to take it slow and easy with them.
I think commitment is a little scary for them, at first. But they really, really want to spend their life with the people they love. They just understand they're in this highly hazardous line of work--sure they're immortal. In a sense. But they're smart enough to try and not push their luck *too* hard. They've got people to come back to.
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Tyler and I sit at a restaurant. He's telling me things I already know.
He's telling me, most of the mercury in the environment comes from the air. And it comes from the air from anywhere. It used to be from coal burning mostly, but we've started to stop doing that. Now it's artesianal gold mining. If you're poor, and you're in some unfortunate shithole, and you hear the white men are coming in to drill up the earth for gold, or they've just left — what you do is you pan out a bunch of rocks. You infuse that with mercury. It forms an amalgam, of gold and mercury and nothing else.
So far, this is fine. But to get at the gold and make a little nugget you can sell so you don't starve to death due to the destruction those people who own the gold company have wrecked upon your region, you have to boil the mercury off. Somewhere out there is fancy technology that helps you catch those areosolized droplets. You can't afford it. You don't even know you should want it. You don't know about ataxia, about losing your hearing and speech and peripheral vision, about brain damage and paralysis and comas and death. You don't know about that. You know your brother, who went insane, but you don't know why, or if you do, you don't know how to stop it, and you can't afford to do so. You boil off the mercury in the room with your baby, because it's the only room in your home, and you have no windows open because a smog has settled outside.
Don't you feel twitchy.
And then the areosolized mercury that doesn't take up residence in your baby or your brain floats on up to the atmosphere, and maybe you get revenge, because it settles down everywhere, including in the wetlands and lakes and shores of the country that that gold company is from. And little microbes eat it, methylate it, and now its much, much more dangerous. It stays in the body far too long. Now, it's concentrated, and the best and fattest fish are full of it.
And now you have to watch your tuna. Your cobia. Your kingfish. The smaller you are the less dose you need. Really, it's only a risk if you're a fetus, or you want one in you. It passes the placenta and gives a baby a small head and artifical cerebral palsy. You don't lay off the fish, you risk giving birth to someone who could match experiences with a victim from Minamata bay. Or, it's only a risk to yourself if you eat fish every day, or if all you eat often enough are the apex predators. If you're the gold mining artesian back in rural Indonesia, or one of the indigenous peoples of wherever-got-fucked who subsist on fish, you can kiss the feeling in your hands goodbye, because you don't have other options.
If you're an unknowing compatriot of the gold mining company, you're eating those fish anyway. The risky ones. The ones that are full of poison and killing them destablizes the ocean. We love our grouper, our snapper, our swordfish, our yellowfin and bluefin tuna. The safest tuna is the shittest, because it's made from the smallest skipjacks, lowest on the food chain. Methylmercury can take eighty days to leave your body. On a Florida vacation, how many big fish will you eat? How much methylmercury are you taking home with you? Can you microdose brain damage?
I know this because Tyler knows this, and Tyler orders me a plate of ahi tuna.
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