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#i feel like i miss a lot of his overall weirdness in fan content
n4rval · 10 months
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a few pointers on how i draw this idiot because i can
Definitely DTed himself (you fool no one dude): come on. if you think he's not crazy enough to experiment on himself, what are you doing. the average creature would likely simply vaporize in a CORE accident, but throw an amalgam(dubious term) in it and watch it haunt your footsteps.
Somewhere around 7' ?: lord have mercy. well, i'm not complaining, i've dealt with 10'.
Old man hunch (ow!): this is what happens when you spend your whole life crouching to look at people. or when you try your best to look smaller and kinder as to not creep anyone out, but you creep them out anyway. loneliness is often the price of brilliance
AUTISM HANDS (RAD) (COOL): or of autism. loneliness is often the price of a neurodivergent understanding of social norms. but sometimes you're just cuckoo bananas as well, and that's okay. tries his best to be a gentleman(fucking old man), comes off a little awkward about it
i've picked purple as his representative color for reasons i'll elaborate once i throw in some pre-DT headcanons in here
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mollfie · 1 year
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I was reading a really good thread by a male SA survivor about how a lot of the fan sexualisation of Astarion makes them uncomfortable, how a lot of people seem to miss the nuance of his character, things they wish had been handled better, what he liked etc. I often forget how people can be super weird about traumatised characters like Astarion. He was not telling others how to enjoy their game, just talking about their experience, but brought up some great points that gave me something to think about.
I very much focus on the hurt/comfort nonsexual aspect first. I love the dynamic of Astarion healing and working out what he wants in all aspects of his life.
I wish the game allowed for more nuance regarding that. It would have been great to be able to really encourage Astarion to heal and assure him that you're not going anywhere beyond a line or two.
But, they're also all adult characters, and I think it's disingenuous to act as if abuse survivors can't enjoy sex and have ownership over their sexuality. I also would have liked the game to explore that more and had some more in-depth interactions where Tav or whoever could assure Astarion and be more supportive.
There's a few moments, such as with the Drow Twins, where I would have liked just one or two lines addressing consent and discomfort. I would be interested to hear why the writers made some of the choices they did.
I think a lot of fans don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings. They just get caught up in the horniness of it all and are having fun. I also think a lot of people haven't finished Astarion's personal quest or played very far into the game or just don't think about it beyond them being fictional. And, it should go without saying that most people wouldn't behave the same way in real life.
Overall, I think Larian did a stellar job. Better than any other crpg I've played in recent years. Luckily, I am also very happy to fill in the gaps and head canon things I thought could be better.
I love Astarion because he is a complex character. I always like characters who are dealing with and overcoming their trauma, finding friendship/love/family, and maybe some revenge as a little treat. I like characters who are not nice. Let them be messy and awful and human. My favourite thing is when someone is terrible but trying to do better, and they are still loved even at their worst.
The way some people act about Neil Newbon, though, does weird me out. He has also mentioned how some elements hit close to home for him, and he drew on that for Astarion's characterisation while voice acting and working with the writers. He doesn't seem all that bothered by how people act, and he plays into the Astarion bit online and on streams. I just find some comments and content to be super out of pocket.
This is such a messy post. Just some rambling thoughts. Anyway, it was a good thread. I just have a lot of feelings. I could expand on this even further, but this post is long enough already.
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celenawrites · 1 year
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TW - just a vent about fandom stuff.
I feel kinda sad about how some creators in the CoD fandom have now abandoned creating content for the game series due to the demanding nature of other fans who used to consume their content. (fics, art, etc)
Like, these artists/writers in the fandom write fanfics/create art, FOR FREE OF COST and dedicate SO MUCH TIME AND ENERGY to their craft despite not getting much in return, only to deal with senseless hate, ignorance, stupidity and get treated as content generation machines; instead of actual human beings with jobs and studies and friends and families that need their time and attention as well.
A lot of us folks who write or draw do this as a hobby. As an outlet for our creativity, and we find this community for the media we are currently fixated on and we create things inspired by it cuz it brings us joy. IT MAKES US HAPPY SO WE CREATE CONTENT FOR IT!!! And then to see the same fandom/community and their horrendous behaviour driving away the creators from the fandom and the media itself is just....sad. Very disheartening.
Like I miss so many of the creators who have just given up on CoD cuz of this issue. Their works have inspired me to start writing again. They make me wish I start learning how to draw and paint again too. Their works have touch my soul, and made me happy - gave me something to look forward to every day.
But I'd much rather they leave the fandom and take care of themselves and their life, than to succumb to this weird pressure fans and fan-content consumers put on them, y'know?
Plus recently, I've seen a lot of racist and stereotypical prejudices from some CoD fans (and even some creators). I know a lot of them are new to the fandom, I was too. But I took an active effort to learn more about this game series. (and it's an ongoing effort cuz I cannot afford to play the games so I have to settle for wiki articles, gameplays, and comics) And I see so many fans not give a shit about it. They treat these characters as blank canvases to fulfill their hypersexual fantasies. (I like me a good smut fic or two, don't get me wrong) But that just makes it impossible for newer fans to get to know more about the lore and the characters. I had just finished watching the campaign for MW, and let me tell you, there are so many complex missions, characters and storylines to explore and depict through fanfics, and it's insane so many people disregard it for their whimsies so easily. That will just stunt your growth as an artist/writer! Read up on the lore, watch the game plays(the OGs and the remakes!) , maybe even read the comics!!! I promise you won't regret it ever!!!
Also, please! For all that is holy, stop putting these complex fictional characters into restricted boxes and label them. That just makes them so one-dimensional. Like -
Soap is not always cheery and bubbly and your fellow bestie. Simon is not an abuser/emotionally dead asshole just because he has a hard time expressing his emotions like everyone else. König, despite the lack of storyline/lore we have on him, isn't an uwu social anxiety babygirl, damn it. Stop excluding Gaz from your HCs and fics! He's a complex man with so many interesting things to explore about his overall story and psyche as a part of 141. He's not always begging for Price's approval either, he can and has objected to how questionable their methods have been regarding their field/work. Stop excluding Gaz from 141 stuff! It makes you look like a POS, and a lot of the people who exclude him are doing so for....pretty racist reasons. As a POC, this shit sucks balls. Also stop stereotyping POC characters in CoD - Alejandro, Rudy, Valeria, Gaz, Farah....just stop. Their ethnicity or race should not deter you from writing about them in a way that doesn't come across as prejudiced and ill-informed.
Also, not necessarily a rant, but please consider/remember the fact that the military has always been a bit of a morally dubious field of work irl, and just cuz CoD is military-centric and features characters who work in the army or PMC and take out bad guys - that doesn't take away from the violent history military has and how they have contributed to the deterioration of many countries (mainly in the Middle East). Heck, even these characters in the CoD games have done extremely unethical things and employed treacherous methods in order to get the job done. These characters may be good people in fiction, but that doesn't mean that they have done great things or have always stayed morally pure. Explore the dubious nature of it all - explore how dark and harrowing it can be for them and for the people that unwittingly or knowingly get involved in their work. It's dark and twisted but it's crucial since it's inspired from our world and it's necessary for us as humans and as artists to explore such themes and analyse them! It's crucial for the soul!!!
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inchidentally · 11 months
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'what if the competition between Lando and Oscar turns bad?' between my landoscar post and comments on other SM content it made me want to get weird in notepad again
I'm tagging @481boxboxbaby and @twinkodium who've asked but I'm sorry if someone's asked to be tagged and I missed it! also tagging @huntscunt who's tags put this idea in my little head
(caveat that I'm a casual fan who happens to have been around F1 fans all my life so this is just my not remotely official perspective lol)
just to state I think it's a given that we're all so excited for McLaren's future with these two is that Lando and Oscar feel like generational talents. and they're also very different as drivers and every race is exciting to watch even just for them. also the fact that Oscar was the jolt of competition that Lando needed.
and honestly I'd be more worried about their future harmony if they hadn't already had so many highly competitive and charged moments in their first season together:
Oscar came in at a surprisingly even level with Lando apart from the obvious difference in experience. he's taken risks that have on balance landed decently on the side of ballsy/respectable vs total failure and the time spent as reserve driver hadn't deteriorated any of his ability. so it was fair to worry for a while if Lando would take the competition as motivation or frustration esp after the disparity between him and DR in 2022.
I really liked the sort of respectful if tentative camaraderie Oscar and Lando showed each other when the car was an absolute tractor. but I liked it even more the fact that the turnaround at McLaren by Silverstone saw them both still in such a good place while being very competitive. that was I think the start of us seeing that Oscar wanted to prove himself a real team player and good teammate by starting the habit of showing up consistently for Lando's podiums/qualis.
the pit lane ding-dong in Monza was definitely the biggest test they've had - and that a lot of teammates will ever have - and the whole thing was handled really well all around. Andrea did the right thing of being big bad boss and Lando was quick to say that it was prob down to misjudgement (which is what I always thought) and that they still respect each other the same. I wasn't as active then so I can't remember if Oscar was asked for a response but I do remember my friends/family telling me that it was impressive how that didn't cause any major damage between the drivers since that's a pretty major incident to happen so early in a new partnership.
side note here to say that the ppl around me who've been watching F1 since the 90s overall feel like the hothead in-fighting with teammates seems to be fading/getting less intense with the younger generations. maybe it's because alpha male mentality seems cringe to gen z or because awareness of mental health is way more prevalent. Gasly and Ocon are relatively young drivers but even there the situation is pretty rare and because of hanging onto childhood grudges. I don't get the impression that any of the people around me feel like the Norris/Piastri partnership is likely to blow up or generate bitterness just because they're competing so closely ??
it's fair to say that Oscar has seemed genuinely happy to acknowledge that Lando is the McLaren brand representative and the established fan favorite within the sport as well as the team's fanbase. he's extremely mature for his years and incredibly well-balanced in terms of ambition. he's almost tailor made as a perfect compliment to Lando. EDITED TO ADD: see Oscar's almost lifelong friendship with Logan Sargeant as an example of Oscar having duked it out on track with someone for years while remaining close friends the whole time. and this was Oscar interrupting his own victory radio message to say how awfully he felt for Logan crashing out early. and that this is what Oscar felt about his and Lando's partnership toward the end of the season.
EDITED TO ADD:
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Silverstone is a perfect encapsulation of how Lando has felt about Oscar from the very start and this was so beautiful to say.
Lando has measured himself by Lewis Hamilton-level goals since karting. Oscar wants to qualify well and win races. Lando was brought into F1 extremely young coming off of huge expectations and has placed enormous pressure on himself since as early as his second year in F1. Oscar has taken a business-like approach to his career since he was 14 and his calm sense of focus and determination comes from focusing on the race ahead and not letting much else in.
Lando's emotions being driven by his superstar destiny/status and Oscar's ability to have calm perspective even during a race is as solid a foundation as you can get in an F1 partnership honestly. they'll absolutely have the same conflicts that all teammates do and the media and DTS will explode those out of all proportion (both of which I ignore anyway). but I really can't see Oscar suddenly flying off the handle or holding grudges and I can't see Lando becoming a driver who suddenly wants to sustain a bad relationship with his teammate after all these years. Oscar is very clearly not the type to develop a crazy ego and Lando genuinely has more of an insane high self-expectation complex than that big of an ego.
even setting aside the parasocial widely felt agreement that they seem to genuinely like and respect each other, neither of them are alpha types and they're not both superstars jostling for publicity and they didn't come up together with a ton of existing history. idk it's just not on the F1 cards that they become icy or resentful.
so while I know no one can see the future and they're both relatively young and could change I don't really feel apprehensive?? and it's way too early to know if either of them will split from McLaren or when. especially if the car stays competitive with RB and Merc then it's the best place for both of them for the foreseeable (and prob most likely since competitive openings elsewhere look to be scant for the next 5ish? years but pls correct me if that's wrong!).
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side side side note: I personally would not want to see Lando at RB. I know he's itching to try that car but unless RB and Max change drastically before then, Lando would positively shrivel up there. he's a superstar and he needs to be someplace he can be a superstar. it's also why I'm glad Carlos and Daniel moved along bc that's why those friendships are still so strong. we saw what had begun to happen when Lando was eclipsing Daniel and I don't even want to think about Carlos and his family if Carlos was teammates with a dominant Lando.
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karouvas · 4 months
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Adam Parrish + 2 😈😈(for the ask game)
How would you rewrite this characters canon arc?
Partially answered with my tag rant on this reblog https://www.tumblr.com/adanseydivorce/751040074340286464?source=share
I don’t really have much I would say about changing his trc arc because I think overall it’s a very good arc one of my favorites. I did reblog a meta post about both trc and tdt and how Adam generally isn’t allowed to *fail* in a sense, when he overworks himself in a variety of ways manually academically magically etc. and that feeding into the weird way he’s a sort of capitalistic success story when you take in all seven books, and I think they’re right and there are places in both trc and tdt where that could be interrogated or altered a bit. But the emotional beats of his arc are well handled imo and I wouldn’t really change them. I would have liked some additional resolutions to some of his relationships in TRK but that has more to do with issues I have with TRK in general and less Adam’s role in it specifically (although I think if I could change one thing there I would have him actually apologize to Blue for some things about how he treated her; but also I partly feel that way more for fandom reasons than in text ones since in text I think their bitchy Ninos argument is a fun resolution. And then the Adansey shovel talk scene is the opposite: I’m not a huge fan of the scene itself as resolution / would prefer Gansey to actually voice his feeling hurt by Adam so it could be unpacked, but fandom was overdramatic and annoying about the scene so that’s pushed me to acceptance.) much more to say about td3 for obvious reasons so moving on:
Basically I like the set up in cdth of him wanting to reinvent himself, of course being who I am I love the fucked up trying to be Gansey 2.0 part of it lol and I don’t think he should have a smooth sailing path to success / suddenly be content at Harvard so him being a bit miserable there and the whole crying club thing made sense. I do think we should have gotten more details about the crying club like I said I think some actual characterization from them could have helped the storyline. But my problems are largely after cdth, how this never really leads to him reckoning with his identity issues the way we need to see on page for this arc to be satisfying (that one pov is good, but it is not nearly enough to carry that to conclusion).
I think I would have written him trying to explicitly reflect or invert his individual relationships with the Gangsey with the Crying Club, maybe he gravitates towards one character who is a mirror (lol) for Blue that could be really fascinating, there could maybe be one character in the group who is a scholarship student and he projects onto them / tries to kind of reverse engineer his dynamic with Gansey with them to work through some things. That’s a way to explore a kind of complicated dichotomy of him feeling victorious he made it out of Henrietta while also missing “the things that were important to him in the past”, it would also effectively mirror some of what Ronan was doing with Bryde and Hennessy since he transposes elements of Niall Adam and imo Gansey onto Bryde + recreates parts of his dynamic with Kavinsky with Hennessy. (I’m torn on whether Ronan should have an explicit mirror in this version of the crying club because on the one hand I feel like the ‘you were the place I stored all that reality’ would hit harder if he’s the one person Adam didn’t try to replace there, on the other hand it could compliment the Bryde plot like I said… (also ik there are a lot of people who don’t like the Bryde plot at all I’m kind of neutral on it tbh I don’t love or hate it but anyway this is not a post about changing Ronan’s arc so writing this assuming that’s p similar to canon and only changes in response to Adam’s). Yes maybe part of this is self indulgent because it plays on some themes it’s well documented on my blog that I’m obsessed with but also this series is literally largely about clones and doubling and this verse has been concerned with identity/mirroring/masking since trc, so I do think it would fit, self indulgent or not! Also getting to see Adam be crazy like this would make him and Ronan ‘forgiving each other’ seem a little less unbalanced at least to me… I still would want like. Actual resolution to the Pynch arc where they talk, break up for at least a week (I would prefer more, but bare minimum that), work through the issues MI poses… particularly I’d want them to have an actual conversation about Ronan’s insecurity about the role Cabeswater played in their getting together and Adam could respond with the fact that Cabeswater is a separate entity from Ronan in the same way Mathew and Bryde are or how Jordan is separate from Hennessy; the deal he made with Cabeswater was of his own volition, is a separate one from their relationship though it may have played a role in it (at least I think this is what we’re supposed to take from that dropped thread?
I just think it’s something that should be discussed). ((I do realize a big part of why Adam’s arc feels off is the audience feedback loop influencing both Maggie’s willingness to write his pov and in how Pynch was ultimately treated, but this is how I think I would want it written)). In terms of the resolution to the Harvard thing it matters less to me if he stays or transfers like I said on that post but I would like a resolution for the crying club either he came clean and was rejected or accepted by them either one would I think be better for that arc than him just ghosting them (at least I think that’s what he did?) And whatever happens with him and the I would want him to actually develop a community outside of the Lynch brothers + The other Gangsey members to some degree, also obviously he is not going to be a cop in this… idk what specific profession I’d want him to have but I would like to think he actually finds something he wants to do / a new goal to be ambitious about rather than just winning at capitalism. Maybe that latter part is wishful thinking… but anyway. Not a cop at the end that’s the number 1 change I would make obviously everything else is of a lower level of importance than that. Pynch can break up then work through their issues and get back together or they can have a proper divorce arc either one works for me but they can not go on Like That… I mean I think Maggie also feels that way but again Audience Feedback Loop (I rbed a really interesting post about how break ups are treated in ya adjacent lit so I do think if nothing else this got me thinking about that on a meta level in a way I didn’t before… still don’t think it was worth it 🫤. Also this is all a word vomit / theoretical, want to remind ya’ll that I first read Greywaren like a month and a half ago, after a reread spiral of the all the other books in the verse (which basically was a first read of td3 since I read cdth and mi for the first time with High Quarantine Brain and remembered basically nothing about them due to that) so maybe some of these thoughts could change … but currently these are my takes xo!
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itsohh · 11 months
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thoughts after completing mw3
I can firmly say its not worth playing unless your a fan of DMZ. as someone who isn't, its horrible.
the game turns 180 on the style of the campaign and you lose a lot of the liner gameplay which made the first two games so enjoyable. in order for what I presume was to cut corners they opt for a more open world more feel. while the other games did have this on some levels it wasn't done in a fun way.
for example 'alone' in mw2 you have the entire stealth aspect with johnny and then in mw1 (I can't remember the mission but its the one where you getting farahs brother) you do open objective as gaz with price and even though its a big area it still feels quite nice and focused.
this weird open world thing was seen in the second to last mission but it was still straight forward. honestly the game felt rushed, empty, spotty and full of fuller content. the story line wasn't very solid and felt ehhhh.
don't even get me started on some of the actual normal missions like 'kill invisible dudes who instantly snipe you before you can see me' fuck me that was horrible. they give the illusion of that you could stealth around them but every time I attempted gaz would get seen. so idk if that was scripted or not but it sucked.
the final mission felt lackluster and dull.
I'll give them that the final cutscene was good and did tug at the heart strings. but also it felt like his death was more for shock value? to reference the previous games. ah idk. it's not bad I suppose but I also feel like it was tacked on, I wish they made it a bigger deal
I can't help but wonder what the level design would have been if they had more time. I miss the way they did things in the previous games and it also so short. they established such a good begining in mw1 and then had maybe not the best game AI but a really good sequeal in mw2. mw3 falls so flat. I miss missions where you spend the entire time stealth, I miss the interactions between soap and ghost, or gaz and price.
for what they delivered it really wasn't worth the price. would I still have bought it? yes because I wanted to experience it.
the lack of optimisation is insane, sure its early access but we all know that they won't fix these bugs. on one mission I was forced to put my graphics on the lowest setting to load it. I have a current gen graphics card. for some random moments my screen would be covered in low pixel smoke that would only clear if I did a 360.
the graphics were of course, amazing and photorealistic but somehow didn't deliver on the immersion that the previous games did. the voice acting and acting alone carried this game unfortuantly let down by the shotty writing, cheap level design and general cash grab vibe to the game.
I thought that this was supposed to be the last game but with the lack of question still to be answered it does feel like they could have another one. without soap though... the team doesn't feel complete. any attempt to bring in roach at this point would feel like hes there to replace him which isn't idk great.
vlad's still out there, so is graves and then the entire plotline with valeria / alejandro has yet to be touched on. I imagined they will bring one of those in for the raid series
the game feels like it has so many holes, mainly why was so little amount of troops sent in. like at times it feels like there only 141 in the world and like ??? speshly with the final mission like your telling me they got only one hotel squad to go with price and soap? against a bomb threat caused by one of the biggest terrorists out there? wtf is everyone doing???
it feels weak and overall I rate the game 4/10
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miscreantahead · 1 year
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I really do think there is a lot to say about how the time constraints or maybe just decisions in general negatively effected the emotional moments, particularly Bellemere's death. The fact that there was no suggestion that she would lose them forever if she didn't say she didn't have kids really made me just kind of feel like she was a silly fuck for not lying... like, I get that she didn't want to deny them, but being willing to die for that isn't nearly as painful or believable as being willing to die to make sure they don't go out into the world and get separated and die because they'll be on their own without a parent. As is we have them hiding under the floorboards, and it's a pretty big leap to ask the viewer to consider that if they stay hiding they might be discovered in the future, or that they'll have to leave after Arlong leaves and then she'll never get to see them again. It would have been nice to get some kind of highlight on the future ramifications of her decision to live (if she'd chosen it) that so it didn't feel like she was stepping up to die just so she wasn't lying about being a mother on principle alone. Also, I think Sanji suffered a lot for not having his own set of villains for himself and Luffy to defeat. The fact that he's only in four episodes and his arc is lacking anything along those lines makes OPLA Sanji a bit hollow to me, which is sad. I think it's nothing a season 2 with plenty of Sanji content can fix, but going from how adored Sanji is in the manga/anime for how complex he is to this introduction with a lot of missing pieces feels a little sad (and also bc of how amazing Taz is). For me, the way things were, I just kind of snorted when Sanji started crying while saying good-bye to Zeff, and that absolutely feels sad and wrong and I wish I could say otherwise. It wasn't that they didn't both do amazing in that scene, but the build-up just wasn't there. Their past together was executed beautifully, but we got so little for them in the present. I wanna say Usopp's development suffered a bit for the same reason. Honestly overall I sort of feel like Koby and Helmeppo ended up being more main-character than Usopp and Sanji, which obviously will change with a season 2, but for now it looks weird.
BUT, that being said, I just feel like that's all an incredibly silly reason to denounce OPLA all together. I get being disappointed, but they did a lot, a lot of things really really well, 90% of them if I had to put a number on it. They just missed on some of the important ones and that hurts for an active fan but that doesn't mean it's not and won't be good and entertaining in its own ways.
I think part of the problem is also that it's difficult not to see this as something by itself thanks to Netflix's track record. We don't have the luxury of just seeing this as a slightly shaky but overall good season one that can grow with the next few seasons. Because no matter how good it is, Netflix might still kill it, and that makes it difficult to try and see what the future of it might offer.
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kosher-martian · 9 months
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I guess I review music now?
No one: Absolutely no one:
The Kosher Martian: Hello and welcome to my review of Nickelback's No Fixed Address
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I'm a fan of Nickelback and I won't apologize for it. I have two of their CDs (The Best of Nickelback Volume 1 and No Fixed Address) but I've also listened to their other work through YouTube. I am not an authority on music whatsoever. I do not keep up with the latest popular music. If you sat me down and made me list bands and artists who made their big break after 1992, I might be able to mention a dozen or so. I bought the album and I just thought I should subject you to my opinions of it. Thoughts on the album as a whole: The album is a bit of a mixed bag. Most of the songs are in search of a new sound for Nickelback, but the end result is a mix of that classic Nickelback grunge-but-not-grunge, rock-but-not-rock, country-but-but-country sound mixed with some other random sound that doesn't always mesh. Overall the first half of the album is great and the back half has a lot of totally forgettable filler that I will skip from now on.
Thoughts about each song on the album:
"Million Miles an Hour" - This is a great album opener and a fun, fast-paced song. It's arguably the heaviest-sounding song, I would say it hits my definition of a metal song. If you mixed this in with some Metallica and Fozzy tracks, I don't think anyone would notice. I strongly believe this has earned its place on a car select screen in a PS2 / PS3 era street racing game.
"Edge of a Revolution" - I think this was their attempt at a protest song a la Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It". Tonally it's a bit weird hearing Nickelback talk about something that feels topical. Their lyrics always have a nostalgic / backwards-looking vibe to them, so to see them so amped up and talking about the problems of modern society (I think the song is just as applicable in 2024 as it was in 2014), it's a bit of a trip to say the least.
"What Are You Waiting For" - For whatever reason, this just sounds like vague, half-remembered knockoff of "Secrets" by OneRepublic. If you wanted to know what Disney's The Sorcerer's Apprentice would sound like with Nickelback as the leitmotif instead of OneRepublic, this is the song for you.
"She Keeps Me Up" - Okay, this one is just strange. It's a little funky, it's a little pop. It works.... but I feel like it shouldn't? Like a lot of pop songs, there isn't much going on lyrically. It gets stale pretty quickly and I found myself wanting to skip to the next track before the song was halfway over.
"Make Me Believe Again" - Lyrically, this feels closer to Nickelback's older work. Musically it sounds pretty modern. Somewhat forgettable. This was the point on the album where songs started to become more forgettable.
"Satellite" - This sounds like unused content from their previous album, Here and Now. If you like "Lullaby", you'll like this song.
"Get 'Em Up" - This is a fun little story song about bank robbers. I don't have much to say other than it is just fun.
"The Hammer's Coming Down" - This is the song that plays during the credits of bad YA movie you found on Crackle or Tubi.
"Miss You" - In 2029 this will be used unironically in an indie film about two teens who fall in love just before the COVID-19 pandemic hits and follows them as they spend the next three years dating each other exclusively through Zoom. It will be called Love in Quarantine or Our World on Pause or something. The girl will come from a family of handwashing libs who wear masks and go to George Floyd protests and the boy will be the quiet artsy son of a bunch of proud American Patriots who break quarantine, have coronavirus parties, and force the boy to go to Back the Blue rallies. An important part of the film will be the boy's father being put on a ventilator and his mom encouraging the boy to stay in quarantine so he can one day meet the girl he loves. The film ends with them holding hands for the first time since 2019.
"Got Me Runnin' Round" (featuring Flo Rida) - I'm sure this is for someone but it just isn't for me. I don't know who Flo Rida is, but his contributions were.... fine. Not the worst track on the album, but not the best either.
"Sister Sin" - This song is so utterly forgettable that it ended without me noticing.
Final thoughts: Kosher? Pareve. Martian? 7 Red Planets 🔴 out of 10. Mars Attacks!
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sortasirius · 4 years
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what makes you think the writers want deancas? not trying to be an asshole, i'm just genuinely curious as to why you think that. i know berens' episodes are pretty heavy with subtext so i can see why you'd say that he wants it, but i'm not so sure about the rest of the writers/dabb. it seems like meghan isn't a huge fan either, given her "they twisted it so fast" tweet :/ of course she's a very new writer (think she's only writing one ep this season?) but still
OKAY this is a great question, welcome to my dissertation.
I’m going to address the end of your question first. Meghan is actually DeanCas positive, she has been for quite a long time. She actually, a few years back, posted a picture of her reading a literal book about Destiel and captioned it “writing reading” or something like that.
This whole thing just comes out of a boiling over of tensions because of how nasty fandom twitter can be. Like I said here, I think this has just gotten blown out of proportion, they shouldn’t have posted all this randomly disparaging stuff, but also like...can you blame them? The fandom is a lot, we always have been, and they’re probably also under a gag order not to talk about the finale, and are annoyed that people keep asking.
So nah, Meg is not anti Destiel.
To the first part!! So let’s take a look at the show runners since Cas has been around.
Seasons 4 and 5: Kripke
Seasons 6 and 7: Gamble
Seasons 8-11ish: Carver
Seasons 11ish-15: Dabb
So starting with Kripke. Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that we have some pretty incredible Destiel moments in these seasons, but it’s less directly written into the plot and much more from Misha and Jensen’s uhhhh ~chemistry~. The only times it was directly written into the script was when the episode was handled by someone like Edlund (“On The Head Of A Pin,” “The End,” “My Bloody Valentine”). And you have to remember, if in season 5, there are moments here and there where you’re like huh that’s suspiciously romantic dialogue, remember that Cas took Anna’s place. Anna was supposed to be endgame for Dean, but due to a myriad of issues and Misha’s general greatness, Anna was replaced with Cas.
Onto 6 and 7. Hmmm. Gamble. 6 and 7 are my two least favorite seasons and that’s no secret, and that’s not only due to the plain old weird shit in the overall storyline, but also that homegirl killed off Cas in s7 and then Bobby like four episodes later. (Also it ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way they couldn’t have Baby in that season lol). We still had some great DeanCas moments, but again, it wasn’t really written into the overall arc (until they had to change the end of season 7 because of tanking ratings and bring Misha back lol, anyone remember the fact that Dean kept Cas’ jacket and would randomly dream of him? Yeah.). But we still had those moments, those distinctly romantic moments, probably the best example in these two seasons is from Edlund again, specifically “The Man Who Would be King,” I wrote a little about that here.
We move onto Carver, who gave us, at this point, the most overt DeanCas season with season 8 (season gr8 is a better name imo), and this is the first time Dean and Cas’ relationship is directly written as an arc of the season.  I mean, you have everything in Purgatory, Dean “seeing” Cas everywhere, the fact that he felt so guilty that Cas stayed in Purgatory that he manipulated his own memories to think that he was the one that failed Cas, because he couldn’t comprehend that Cas would want to leave him, and let’s not forget Dean snapping Cas out of Naomi’s hold on him in “Goodbye Stranger.”  It was a very obvious shift, not enough to alert the general audience, but more than enough for most of us in fandom.
It’s also important to note that this is when Andrew stopped co writing with Loflin and started writing his own episodes (”Hunter Heroici” anyone?)  I like Loflin fine, but Dabb was able to stretch his legs a little bit more once he stopped co-writing, and we also began to see some DeanCas themes in his solo episodes.
In any case, them and their issues being a big part of the seasons continued with Carver, and Berens entered the scene, his first episode (”Heaven Can’t Wait”) is one of my favorites, with human Cas and the fanfiction gap and Dean and Cas just generally being awkward and funny and sweet.  This is Bobo’s FIRST episode, remember that.  He comes right out of the gate with it.
Also in Season 9, this is when Dean takes the Mark of Cain, and the Cas/Colette mirror is born, so obviously, Dean and Cas are the fabric of the season once again.  This is also the season where Metatron says Cas is “in love with humanity,” and then immediately refers to Dean as Humanity so uhhhh yeah.
Onto season 10, Dabb and Berens continue with their greatness (I could write pages on the DeanCas date in “The Things We Left Behind” alone).  And then we have one of the best scenes in the entire show in “The Prisoner” where the Cas/Colette mirror continues and Dean, driven by grief and pain and rage and the Mark, still doesn’t kill Cas.  He still can’t kill Cas.
Season 11 is important because it takes choice away from both Cas and Dean, and shows us, as the audience, how much losing each other takes out of them. We saw in season 10 how much losing Dean takes from Cas, but what about Cas losing Dean?  Dean loses his choice with his connection to Amara this season, and loses even more when Lucifer reveals he’s been possessing Cas, and plays on Dean’s connection to Cas like a mockery.  It’s also worth noting that, similarly to season 8, Dean breaks out of the connection with Amara when he’s worried about Cas, and that’s something that even SHE is surprised by.
But then season 12, the beginning to the Renaissance.  This is when we get the writer’s that become important for what Dean and Cas are today, and, truly, why I believe they want canon Destiel as much as we do.
This is the first season with Dabb’s writers: Davy Perez, Meredith Glynn, Steve Yockey, and of course Bobo all come in with their incredible talents and gave us episode after episode of good content.  “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is probably my favorite, probably the best example of what I’m saying.  An episode where Dean is called out by an enemy directly, told to “roll the dice” on Cas’ life.  And Dean won’t, it’s not even really a hesitation.  And this comes from a character that has known Dean for ten seconds.  I also wrote more in depth about this episode here.  There are also some.....distinctly domestic details we get this season, specifically in “The Future” (written by Berens and Glynn) with the mixtape.  The most tropey of tropes mixtape.  Yeah, I’ll just leave that one here.
And then season 12 ends with Cas’ death, but also with the parallel between Sam and Dean with Jess and Cas.  Sam literally has to drag Dean away from Cas, just like Dean had to drag Sam out of his burning apartment in the pilot.  The episode drives it home in every way that it can: Dean is the one left kneeling by Cas’ body, while Sam goes to find out what is upstairs.  Dean is the one who stares at the sky, finally broken.  This isn’t a random thing, this is Dean’s whole arc, it’s the entirety of the beginning of 13.  Dean’s pain, his anguish, his anger.
Season 13 starts with them burning Cas, with Dean, who has begged God to bring him back, who has split his knuckles punching a door, standing, staring at Cas’ pyre with brokenness on his face.
I mean.....
Anyway, season 13 is where it gets interesting (well, I think all of this is interesting but I’m a writer nerd so).  So Cas comes back from the Empty in “Advanced Thanatology” written by Steve Yockey, and then a wombo combo of “Tombstone” by Davy Perez next (”Brokebacknatural” as the PR said at the time).  Listen.  This is the part that SPN crossed a line that they couldn’t come back from.  With Cas being Dean’s “big win,” the fact that Dean and Cas watch movies together, “I told you, he’s an angry sleeper.  Like a bear.” Talked about it here.
This is where, in my opinion, the network stepped in, but the damage was already done.  They had already established that Cas was Dean’s big win, that Dean’s poor coping was not due to Mary’s disappearance, but solely due to Cas, and that Dean and Cas have more married energy than anyone else.  The network had nixed blatant canon at this point, and they writing room had been pushing the boundaries of what the network would allow. 
After these episodes, we see a marked drop off of DeanCas heavy scenes.  They’re still there, still a part of the fabric of the season, but not as...obvious as it had been in early season 13.
And this continued through season 14, we’re back to scraps of Destiel scenes here and there, but to me it always felt like there was something bubbling under the surface, something distinctly unsaid in the themes of the season, even after the walk back of obvious “Dean and Cas are in love” scenes.
And then we get to season 15, which, y’all know I talk about all the time.  What’s important here is that Bobo and Glynn are both executive producers, calling more of the shots than ever before.  Additionally, it’s important to note that, though they only co write occasionally, Glynn and Berens refer to each other as “work husband” and “work wife.”  Each episode has just turned up the volume, and, not for the first time, but certainly the most obvious, Dean and Cas ARE the season.  Sure, they’re trying to beat God, they’re trying to finally find peace, defeat the final big bad, but really?  This season has been about Dean, and Dean’s relationship to Cas.
And not only do we have obvious and clear Destiel in nearly every episode, but we have episodes like “Last Call” which canonize bi!Dean (wrote about that here).
And, maybe most importantly so far, we have “The Rupture,” the breakup, and “The Trap,” Dean’s confession (both written by Berens).  And here’s the thing.  These episodes feel connected, but also feel like they’re missing something.  Beren’s last episode is 15x18, “The Truth.”  We’ve all spec’ed about what could happen in this episode, and I think *I* know what it’s leading to.  But for it to be leading to that, it means that the network has to have approved what we’ve all been waiting for years for.
Who got this change to happen?  Who got the network to change their minds?  It wasn’t us.  It was them.  I am fully convinced that Dabb and Berens quite literally put their careers on the line for Dean and Cas.  They believe in them, they’ve shown that from the beginning, but the only thing standing in the way was the network, never allowing them to take the final step. 
So, to answer your question: I think the writers want canon DeanCas because they’ve already shown us that they do.  Take a look at their episodes, at Dabb’s, at Beren’s, at Glynn’s, at Perez’s, at Yockey’s.  They’ve been telling us what’s going on with Dean and Cas for years.
Sure, I’m not in their heads, I guess I don’t know for *sure* that this has been their thought process, but if we put it all together, from the marked shift when Dabb fully took over in s12, to the change right after “Tombstone,” to the new shift, the blatantly romantic shift in season 15, what else is there?
I’ve said for a long time that we, the SPN fandom, are beyond lucky to have the writer’s that we do.  They’re all going to go on to have prolific careers and we were lucky to get them at the end of our little show.  I give them a lot of credit for what we have in the show today.
Just remember, they’ve been telling us in all of s15 who Chuck is.  He says he’s the writer, right?  But a writer who doesn’t have control of his characters?  A writer who wants to do the same ending over and over because it “works”?  That doesn’t sound like a writer, it sounds like a network exec.
They’ve been showing us what they want for years, and the way s15 is going?  I think they may have convinced the network to let us have it.
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BTS In The Soop (Season 2)
I don’t know how other fans have been feeling about ITS s2, but, personally, I’m not the biggest fan. I enjoy watching the episodes, but I also feel a bit indifferent towards the series as a whole. I think part of the reason why is that it airs on JTBC. I felt this with s1 as well, but BTS almost don’t feel like BTS. We see them be playful and touchy with each other, but it also feels like their playfulness, silliness and skinship is toned down a lot. If we think about Run BTS, Bangtan Bombs, BTS Episodes, Memories footage, vlives, etc. they paint a different picture of BTS. Even when we have longer footage of them, their intimacy is obvious. In ITS, their closeness is there, of course, but overall they feel more distant from each other than usual, and I feel a bit distant from them as a result. 
For example, we saw from the teasers and the official pics that Jikook rode the ATV together, and worked out together, and JK gave JM a massage. Why is that content not in the episodes? We have Taekook riding the ATV together, so I can understand that Jikook doing it would feel repetitive. Pls do not think I’m making this a Taekook vs. Jikook thing. Under no circumstances am I doing that. What I mean to say is that certain footage can’t air if it’s just a repetition of what we’ve seen already, but most of the episodes are pretty much an eating show. 
Jikook working out is something the fans would’ve loved to see; BTS playing games together like in Run is something that fans would’ve loved to see. Yet every time they play sports we only get to watch a fraction of it... Instead, we get a lot of footage of them cooking and eating. I know fans like to watch BTS cook, but isn’t it a bit excessive? An episode is supposed to represent a day, but half of the episode are the few hours they spend in the kitchen. I personally got bored watching this last episode (episode 4) because they all had lunch separately and we watched all of them make their food and eat it. I would’ve loved to have seen more of BTS playing volleyball, or Vminkook’s ridiculous challenge, or OT7 watching the Olympics. 
My point is that I doubt ITS would be edited like this if it weren’t airing on JTBC. We’d probably be getting more OT7 content in that case. But since this is a family friendly show, as it often happens when BTS makes content more geared toward the Korean GP, we get a cooking show. 
Also, I know Jin is just chilling and playing games - and good for him for relaxing and not caring about being entertaining - but I miss him! I feel like he’s barely in the episodes, and he interacts very little with the other members. It almost feels like he’s not in BTS. I know he’s always playing games, but Jungkookie watched him play for a bit, and I would’ve liked to have seen more of that. We’ve barely gotten any Jinkook interaction so it would’ve been nice to have seen JK cheer for Jin or something. 
Lastly, the editing is so fucking weird. We literally watched Jin go to bed, yet a second later he was watching the Olympics with the other guys, and Jimin got freshened up twice. From what I understood, they played volleyball and ate, then OT7 watched the Olympics, then Jin went to bed and Jimin got freshened up, and then some of the members watched more of the Olympics. But the editors decided to show all the footage of the boys watching the Olympics at once, so they showed Jin going to bed and Jimin going to wash himself up before showing them watch the Olympics, and then later we saw Jimin talk about washing himself again... 
Again with Jikook, in the second episode they played tennis with JHope, and afterwards, according to the official pics, they must’ve ridden the ATV together before Jimin went to their PC room and JK chose to work out. In the episode we only see them play tennis, then Jimin and JK reappear wearing a long-sleeved shirt underneath their loose t-shirts. But while JK begins his workout wearing his long-sleeved shirt, by the time he finishes working out he’s not wearing it anymore, which indicates, to me, that whatever use he had for that shirt he fulfilled before working out (meaning, when Jikook rode the ATV together, probably). But why not show that footage? It would only have taken a minute, and we wouldn’t have been confused by Jikook putting on an undershirt for apparently no reason. Weird editing once more. 
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dangermousie · 4 years
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2020 End of Year Post - cdrama edition
This is only going to cover cdramas that aired in 2020; if I had to make a post about all the cdramas I watched this year, I would still be doing it in three months...
Overall it’s been a fairly decent cdrama year (certainly better than the very lacklustre kdrama year.) It’s no miracle that 2019 was (so many excellent dramas!) but overall pretty solid.
DRAMAS WATCHED
(In order of liking from least to most as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list)
44 The Legend of Jing Yan - the worst cdrama I have seen this year, and possibly the worst drama of 2020, period. The hero and heroine were both uncharismatic, incapable of acting and saddled with such shrilly moronic characters, the only suspense was how they haven’t both perished long since from forgetting to breathe. Nor was anyone in the rest of the cast much better; the screenplay was written by a lower mammal and the cinematography was the best a third-rate wedding cinematographer could offer. Stay the HELL away from this one.
43 Unicorn Girl - the only unicorn about this bland yet irritating piece of pap was the fact that I was supposed to believe the leads are hockey players.
42 Autumn Cicada - I like spy stories, Allen Ren, and Republican Era settings. I can tune out Communist propaganda with the best of them. Yet, the propaganda ate the story to such a degree that there was nothing left; pre magic change Pinocchio was less wooden then this narrative.
41 You Complete Me - no you do not.
40 Skate into Love - the only positive thing I can say about this is that at least it’s better than Unicorn Girl, if for no other reason that only one of them is supposed to be a hockey player.
39 Irreplaceable Love - how do you make a story about fake siblings with a mad mother falling for each other boring? I don’t know, ask the makers of this.
38 Eternal Love Rain - I hate to rain on their parade, but these two actors cannot act, have about as much chemistry as a piece of bread, and are trapped in a story perfect for entertaining the mental abilities of the leads of Jin Yan.
37 For Married Doctoress - ummmm, you could do worse I guess. It only made me break out in mild hives. The sadistic ending did make me laugh though.
36 Dance of the Sky Empire - why you get Xu Kai and waste him in this insipid mess of a story is beyond me.
35 Love Designer - it’s inoffensive except to my sense of entertainment. There is nothing wrong with it but oh God is it bland.
34 Love a Lifetime - It felt like a lifetime watching this, but I didn’t love it. The story is incoherent, the actors have no chemistry and it’s all an epic waste of time.
33 Love is Sweet - so sweet it gave me diabetes. I like Luo Yunxi and Bai Lu, but there is literally no plot. I don’t need to sink into a plotless morass to watch pretty people engage in PG-rated make-outs. I am an adult with access to stronger stuff if I am thus inclined, though to be fair they could get x-rated and I still wouldn’t be able to sit through so many episodes of plotlessness for that.
32 Fake Princess - I love Zhao Yi Qin, but the guy needs to pick better projects. The female lead in this one has the voice and personality that can strip paint but the story is also doing nobody any favors.
31 The Changan Youth - I lost my brain checking this out. I had to go and read a dense treatise on medieval coinage or Mayan farming to try to recover it.
30 My Dear Destiny - kinda cheesy fun. It honestly shouldn’t be as low except it really feels like community theater.
29 Handsome Siblings - why is the Nic Tse version so good and this one so bad? True mystery for the ages. Chen Zhe Yuan is the sole reason this isn’t lower, because that kid tries SO HARD to make this drama bearable and almost succeeds. I can’t wait to see him in Sha Po Lang which actually will give him something to do.
28 In a Class of Her Own - see my comment on The Changan Youth. But at least Song Weilong is gorgeous to look at.
27 General’s Lady - inoffensive, pretty and so utterly pointless.
26 The Blooms at Ruyi Pavilion - those two leading actors are a no go to me but at least they considerately acted with each other instead of ruining two dramas for me. It’s very pretty though.
25 Jiu Liu Overlord - it’s a mess and I bailed, but I placed it this high merely due to the fact that Lai Yi finally gets a leading role and he’s sexy as fuck and I am shallow. Whoever styled Bai Lu should never work again except at a circus, however.
24 Cross Fire - not my genre and Luhan will always look too much like my cousin for comfort, but it’s a surprisingly gripping and dark drama. I liked it!
23 God of Lost Fantasy - if you want to watch a mediocre wuxia/xianxia, this is not a bad choice. Probably better than Legend of Fei actually, because at least it doesn’t have an A-list cast to waste and gives us Sheng Yilun himbo and shirtless.
22 Renascence - the insane cuts (it went from 70 eps to 36!!!) made a fairly cheesy story into a total mess. But I had a good time until I finally bailed mainly because of the male lead (Chen Zhe Yuan yet again carrying a not-good 2020 drama on his shoulders; the guy should be nicknamed Atlas) and the insane but in a fun way story. The female lead (both the character and the actress) were not up to par but oh well.
21 Legend of Fei - only this high because objectively there is nothing I disliked it. But there is nothing I liked either. The most uninspired drama on the list. If you could eat cardboard, this is what it would taste like.
20 Ever Night 2 - compared to EN1, it’s a waste of film. On its own merits, it’s not very good (the cast replacements are uniformly inferior and Dylan Wang is so wrong for Ning Que I cannot even put it into words; the script is useless.) But it had some parts I loved so very VERY much (all the shippy stuff was perfection) so I don’t feel too bitter.
19 Castle in the Sky 2 - a lovely if not too complex fairy tale. It is inferior to its prequel because it doesn’t have Zhang Ruo Yun who elevated it, but it’s still a solid bit of fun.
18 The Great Ruler - it’s very high fantasy, very pretty, and surprisingly involving.
17 (tie) Legend of Two Sisters in the Chaos - the secondary couple steals the show but the rest is not too bad if not too involving.
17 Legend of Awakening - a solid bit of fun with a seriously BDSM streak (theme this year apparently - but come on, the lead’s powers only activate when he’s in extreme pain!) It’s a bit generic and the costuming is done by a blind person, not to mention the OTP is a NOTP, but the rest of relationships (romantic and platonic) are wonderful (I live for the found siblings story in this one) and I like most of the characters.
16 Consummation - a rare modern cdrama I liked; a sweet coming of age story (and love story) even if wrapped in a pretty weird virtual reality concept.
15 Oops the King is in Love - this is how you do a low budget, sweet, silly piece of fluff. Our heroine pretends to be a eunuch and crosses paths with a powerless young king and they are adorable, even more so than the drama.
14 Song of Glory - pretty solid, though draggy and I didn’t love the toothpaste filter. But A+ cast, excellent leading couple chemistry, Li Qin being a BAMF and a leading man (Qin Hao) who is actually an adult.
13 And the Winner is love - objectively kind of a mess (and the heroine has the brainpower of a gnat), but the OTP chemistry is excellent and Luo Yunxi fighting and flirting with a fan as finally a leading man is worth the price of admission.
12 Miss S - snazzy and snappy and stylish and whatever else starts with S.
11 Eternal Love of Dream - I don’t know if it would work for you as well if you weren’t a hardcore shipper for this OTP in Three Lives but I was and this was such a darling, wonderful, shippy delight; plus I love this type of high fantasy.
10 (tie) Maiden Holmes - solid and sweet and a wonderful OTP. Proves that functional doesn’t have to mean boring. If you watch one cross-dressing drama this year make it this one.
10 Qin Dynasty Epic - srs bsns history epic. I am not far into it but it’s so good and smart and visually stunning (if you love battles, this one is for you.)
9 Love Lasts Two Minds - I adored this so much more than I should objectively have, but it’s so beautiful (and no I am not just referring to Alan Yu’s face) and the OTP has wonderful chemistry and the story is solid, and the whole trope of her memory being wiped but falling for him all over again while he’s constantly and utterly devoted is a fave; plus he’s in pain and semi-dyng for most of it so sluuuurp (happy ending, don’t worry)
8 To Love - yes, a modern drama is this high! But it involves intensity, tragedy, genuine adults and sexiness that is Lin Gengxin. And there is an actual plot and darkness OMG!
7 Legend of Xiao Chuo - so beautiful, so fun, so full of gorgeousness of Shawn Dou. Plus, Liao is a rare setting for a cdrama and there are a lot of characters and stories I liked a LOT. Less ship content than I wanted but more than I expected.
6 The Romance of Tiger and Rose - so so delightful. I was literally laughing out loud. I have no idea if it will work as well if one isn’t a seasoned watcher of period cdrama/reader of web novels, with bonus for watching/reading Goodbye My Princess, but it was a complete delight for me (and yes, I shipped for real, as well. Best of both worlds.)
5 Twisted Fate of Love - Jin Han gets a leading period drama role! And he’s enjoying it to the hilt, excellent as a smart, twisty bastard who is also charming and so madly in love with heroine. Sun Yi is beautiful and tough and her chemistry with JH is on fire, the story never drags, and it’s so twisty and fun and just awesome.
4 Love In Between - the most underrated drama on this list. It has no big names or big budget, but it’s wuxia that’s clever, driven, tragic, hopeful and so beautifully shot. Three separate (amazing) OTPs, a leading man who is so not typical (a doctor who cannot fight and who never acquires this ability) and who is intense and smart and damaged, a heroine who puts her quest ahead of her emotions, an unhealthy degree of involvement by yours truly. This is a drama Fei should have been.
3 Love and Redemption - such a lovely, addictive, utterly romantic fairy tale. I was obsessed with it for a reason. All the tropes you love and some you didn’t know you did, a star-crossed OTP to the nth power (and a secondary OTP I hardcore love), a twisty yet coherent plot, some insane chemistry and so much whump and hurt/comfort they must have bought blood packets in bulk.
2 Go Ahead - yes, I can’t believe it either. A contemporary slice of life cdrama made it this high on my list. But the way it feels so real, the found family perfection, the characters I love and loathe, the perfect cherry of a wonderful OTP that hits my narrative kinks on top, and just a perfect storm of loveliness all around with this one.
1 The Wolf - is that any surprise to anyone who’s checked out this tumblr for the last couple of months? Tragic, intense and gorgeous; so romantic and angsty and passionate it made me lose my mind (though some of it was gone the moment the camera panned to Darren Wang) - all my favorite tropes and then some; this is a drama that may not be perfect but it is 100% and then beyond perfect for ME.
FAVORITE DRAMA
The Wolf - I have seen objectively better cdramas; even this year. But it has been literal years since I have been this hardcore obsessed, this utterly pleased, this emotionally catered to and devastated at once. A beautiful dark fairy tale that manages to own me despite the storytelling gaps due to censorship, it took me for one of the biggest emotional roller coaster rides of my drama watching career. Visually gorgeous, poetic, intense, and so romantic it took my breath away, this is not just my favorite cdrama of 2020, it’s my favorite drama this year period, and the one cdrama this year to make it into my permanent Top 10 cdramas list.
WORST DRAMA
Legend of Jin Yan - see my write up for it for why as I refuse to waste more time on this stupid mess.
FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER
Wolfie, The Wolf - he is such a haunted, tormented, complex, dark mess; loving and violent, severely damaged and with a hidden yearning softness, longing and aloof. And the amount of charisma and sheer masculine sex appeal Darren Wang brings to the role is insane and not something I see much of in a cdrama. Plus, that character arc with its rapid fall and slow painful redemption is A++++
Runner Up:  Sifeng, Love and Redemption - has a male lead ever loved more utterly and selflessly, suffered more thoroughly and beautifully, and managed to have such chemistry with both his leading lady and his leading man (that his leading lady temporarily turned into) at once? The answer is no.
Almost made the cut - Feng Xi, Twisted Fate of Love, Han Shuo, The Romance of Tiger and Rose, Qing Ci, Love in Between.
FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER
Xiao Qian, The Romance of Tiger and Rose - so funny, so much the reason this drama was such a delight. I adore her beyond words.
NEEDS TO BE MURDERED
Murder Daddy, The Wolf - I am sad the censors robbed us of seeing him die on screen. He was fully human but nonetheless managed to be the worst monster in a drama full of literal ones.
Ling Xiao’s Mom, Go Ahead - I hate her so much I don’t want to look up her name. She abused the kid, the disappeared and came back to abuse him some more. I mean she literally gave her child mental health issues. She is the WORST.
FAVORITE SHIP
Xing’er x Wolfie, The Wolf - are you kidding me? Who else could it ever be for me? They destroyed each other and saved each other, sworn enemies and childhood lovers, soulmates and epic messes, they couldn’t live with or without each other. The longing, the passion, the intensity, the angst, the epicness. LIKE THERE ARE NO WORDS!!!!
FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP
Si Yuan, Shen Manqing, Love in Between - I loved them as much and often more than the main OTP. So much angst and passion and a happy ending! She is a seeming sect darling (except the sect is horrible and also sexist so her only worth is as a marriage candidate) and he’s an information broker who is actually one of the members of a destroyed sect that’s blamed for the massacre of her family. That chemistry and yearning is insane. The scene where she touches his face when he’s unconscious was in serious running for my favorite scene of 2020.
NOTP
Legend of Awakening - I have never seen a couple that didn’t just have no chemistry but exhibited actual revulsion towards each other before watching Chen Feiyu and Cheng Xiao try to act as lovers in this one. It was almost entertaining to be honest.
FAVORITE SCENE
It’s a tie and both are from The Wolf. One is a sequence where Wolfie marches to the walls alone, seeking death at Xing’er’s hands and the whole sequence with the battle and rescue follows. The other is the intercut between Xing’er going to her wedding and Wolfie going to his execution, and the auto-da-fe being intercut with her wedding.
BIGGEST CRUSH
Wolfie, The Wolf - Ummm have you seen this tumblr lately, it’s basically a drool shrine to the man.
BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER
Yelü Yansage, The Legend of Xiao Chuo - I have loved this actor since The Myth and he continued to competently steal every scene he was in.
NEEDS A SEQUEL
To Love - come out of the coma, dammit!!!!!!!
NEEDS A DIRECTOR’S CUT
The Wolf - duh. It started out as 59 eps and got cut to 49. I reaiize some stuff is never gonna get put in due to censorship, but some of the stuff that got cut got for time reasons because they were deluded and hoping to get a TV broadcast so ep count had to be under 50. I mean I doubt the censors would care if they kept scenes of Wolfie building her a swing or whatever. I really really want a director’s cut the way Goodbye My Princess did even if like with GMP it’s only three extra eps. Hell, I will take extra three minutes, as long as those three minutes are Darren Wang shirtless or with a sword. Ahem.
NEEDS SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT
The Song of Glory - it’s a fairly solid drama but honestly it didn’t need to be as long as it was and kind of got draggy and I got lost interest. (I could have gotten snarky and said all the dramas I didn’t like needed scissors taken to them in their entirety but decided to play nice.)
TOO MANY SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT
There are a number of dramas I could complain about with regard to this (hi there, darling The Wolf!) but this award goes to Renascence - poor Renascence was never going to be a masterpiece, but it had the potential to be a bit of good cheesy fun until it had its run time cut by more than half and became an incoherent piece of insanity.
TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE
Dumb shrill innocent heroine who can’t tie her shoes - see basically all the cdramas I didn’t like this year.
FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF
Male lead torture - I mean it’s always open season on that in cdramas, but between Love and Redemption, The Wolf, Love Lasts Two Minds, Love in Between and so on, it was a banner year!
BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT
Legend of Fei - what a waste of that cast; what a waste of our finite time on this Earth. What a waste of my intelligence to hope for something better and stick with it for a dozen eps. I have had stale wonderbread that had more personality than this drama.There is absolutely nothing that stands out about this drama in any way,  from half-dimensional characters, to actors who are sleepwalking, to a plot that moves at the speed of an arthritic snail, to uninspired cinematography and direction, to lack of any chemistry between anyone in the cast. If paint-by-numbers was done by a group of particularly linear robots, it might come across the same way as this drama.
BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE
The Wolf - honestly, I did not expect it to come out AT ALL EVER let alone to become my favorite drama of 2020. I was not familiar with the leading man (hahah), I liked Li Qin but wasn’t yet obsessed with her, and Xiao Zhan was excellent in The Untamed but I was hardly going to follow him from drama to drama (and I don’t do SLS any way.) And the trailer was enjoyable but unlike seemingly everyone, I didn’t think it was going to be some epic masterpiece. And then it came out and while it wasn’t objectively an epic masterpiece, it pulled out all the favorite tropes, shippy and narrative kinks from the deepest darkest recesses of my id. And I fell harder than I have in years. 
2020 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH
None. Covid Year gave me PLENTY of time
BEST NON-2020 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2020
Novoland Eagle Flag and Joy of Life - they are in my Top 10 dramas from anywhere now. They are quite different except being smart and giving me protagonists to obsess over.
ETA: Also The Untamed because @idlewilds3 pointed out I actually watched it in 2020 even though I didn’t think so because this hellyear has lasted about three decades.
MOST ANTICIPATED IN 2021
I am gonna limit it to dozen and leaving out ones that aren’t necesarily supposed to air next year (Joy of Life 2, Love in Flames of War, Novoland Princess from Plateau.)
Monarch Industry, Novoland Pearl Eclipse, Silk Washing Stream, Dream of Changan, Sword Snow Stride, Wu Xing Shi Jia, Ancient Love Poetry, Immortality, The Long Ballad, Mirror Twin Cities, The Imperial Age, Fall In Love
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blockgamepirate · 3 years
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Feel free to ignore, if you don't feel like answering! But I'm so interested in your thoughts on the newest Wilbur-stream and what it revealed about his character. I'd love to hear your insights (if you have any particular insights, that is!) Always appreciate your analyses!
Aww thank you!
Tbh I have a lot of thoughts but nothing properly sorted yet. (Also idk how original any of my thoughts are because I’ve barely been reading other people’s thoughts. I’m just kinda dealing with some minor health issues rn, it’s draining all my energy.)
I guess the clearest part is that this confirmed a lot of things about past-Wilbur, that he did in fact lie to Phil (I mean I didn't doubt that but it helps to hear it) and that it likely was because he didn't want Phil to worry/be disappointed in him which is basically what I assumed.
Also that L'Manburg really wasn't as serious for him as he used to imply, although I think part of that might also be that it's been 13 years since he cared about it and being trapped in limbo would probably make anyone re-evaluate their priorities and maybe realise that the specific country wasn't as important as what that country represented for him. Which is a healthy conclusion to come to. I don't think it's all about the re-evaluation though, I've always read Wilbur's relationship to L'Manburg as less noble than what he wanted others to believe. A tool to "stick it to the man" kind of makes sense. What he didn't say explicitly, but what I think was pretty heavily implied, was also that it was a tool to gain power for himself, to benefit from division on the server. (See also the very last scene with Quackity's letter.) He’s an opportunist and L’Manburg was an opportunity for him. I think he did get invested in it along the way, though, I don’t think all of that was fake.
The way he manipulates Tommy is also pretty similar to how he originally got Tommy on board with his potion scheme and later L'Manburg. The difference is that Tommy is much more aware of it this time so we'll see how it goes. Right now he seems to be falling right back to his role as Wilbur’s... idk, sidekick I guess, but he’s also at least somewhat aware of the fact that it’s happening.
Other stuff is more complicated.
I think the most relatable part of Wilbur's character now is just how happy he is to be alive and to meet other people again, which makes a lot of sense. And for all that he made fun of Ranboo, he seems to be starting out trying to have good connections with everyone, he basically apologised or otherwise reconciled with everyone he met, or at least tried to be somewhat diplomatic. I think that's basically him trying to start over and get a sense of where everyone is at right now, for future plans. My guess is that both in character and out of character Wilbur knows that allegiances might be very different this time around. Although he still wants to include Tommy. I'm curious to see whether that's going to happen or not, Tommy is so wary of Wilbur but then again I know the two of them like to stream together so they might actually end up having their characters team up despite everything and hooooo boy....
That said I hope it won't be too much like the Pogtopia arc, I hope Tommy will have a bit more plot agency and not mainly just exist to criticise Wilbur and to try to convince him not to do what he's planning to do. (I was always really disappointed that the Tubbo, Tommy, Niki team up never happened after the Red Festival. IMO it was built up and then it just went nowhere, idk if it had something to do with irl issues or if it just didn't fit the plot outline but in any case it was a missed opportunity.)
Wilbur living with Phil is kinda... I have mixed feelings because I'd love to see them interact more but I'm pretty sure it won't end well and I don't know which bad ending is going to be the one that happens. I just care about Phil's character a lot. And oh god the Syndicate...
I have NO IDEA how Wilbur is supposed to know about the Syndicate and I'm not a fan, honestly. There better be a really good explanation for it because Wilbur didn't just know vaguely that there was some kind of anarchist society that had formed which could be common knowledge what with how unsubtle those nerds are, but he even knew what it was called, which implies that either somebody snitched or there's something weird going on.
I'm kinda worried because I wanted the Syndicate to actually get to have SOME development before it had to face a crisis.
Also damn you Wilbur for that "government" comment, I don't have the spoons to go through those debates again. I don't particularly care what his intent was, it's painful either way.
I guess overall I'm both excited and worried because I do like Wilbur's content and his character (well, except when I don't) and I genuinely love his style of storytelling which was already a huge breath of fresh air, but I hope it won't end up sidelining other plots. Quackity has barely even gotten started and the Egg arc hasn't yet had a full conclusion. I hope they'll all be tied together, rather than just happen awkwardly in parallel. (I know Dream promised plotlines would be tied together but Dream has promised a lot of things that turned out to be misleading, I don't trust him lol)
(I mean I personally don’t even care that much about the Egg plot, it’s really just not my thing, but it’s there and it would just make it even less satisfying if it basically just ended with the Banquet. It was built up as such an existential threat and it really hasn’t been that at all. Something that ominous kinda needed to actually take over the entire server, or at least cause a proper bloodbath, otherwise it just loses its menace.)
I don't know, we'll see. What I'm hoping is that Wilbur's first plan is to break Dream out because that's been a long time coming and would be more interesting than just "Wilbur starts a new scheme with Tommy". I mean he's obviously going to start a new scheme, but I just want the prison break plot first. And I'm guessing now that Wil lives with Phil, Techno might also be involved which would FINALLY resolve the "favour" which has just been hanging in the air for ages, and hopefully also some of the tension between Techno and Dream's characters which goes back even further. And Techno's character, as an anarchist, just should be anti-prison in general.
Idk, like I said, I lots of thoughts, nothing properly sorted yet.
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Given that fandom has decided to be aggressively negative this season, I figured I’d carve out a little corner of positivity for myself, so. Here we are. Stuff I liked about Supergirl ep. 6x02 “A Few Good Women”
Spoilers!
I’m not really a fan of vampires but you know what I am a fan of? Deep comics cuts! The planet of Transilvane and its vampiric inhabitants were introduced in Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen #142-143, written by Jack Kirby!
I like the effect they’re using on Kara’s eyes in the Phantom Zone. It’s both creepy and cool.
Personally, I thought the way they set up the courtroom was a really nice work-around for Covid restrictions. 
As always, I am forced to admit that I enjoy seeing Lex and Lillian snark and yell at each other.
But also yes. I am...ready to be done with the Luthors.
All three of them honestly.
And then we got PAPA ZOR-EL.
He is a space dad, but not a Space Dad. 
In addition to Nu!Zor (Now with more facial hair!) we got a little bit of...I think it’s “You Will Do Extraordinary Things” and of course, everyone’s fav, “Harnessing Anger”. Love that good score.
(I’ll get to Kara in a sec, I wanna have space to ramble.)
Mmmm, some other good stuff...
Oh, of course. ACTUAL SPACE DAD!
AND M’GANN!
I love that M’gann has stuck around at the outset of this season. IDK if she’s set to appear beyond this initial stretch, but man, I wish she would.
Like yes, it’s a whole other character they have to serve in an already large ensemble cast, but she brings such a nice energy to the group, and plays well off of J’onn. 
I diiiiiiig it. 
Also, she knows the Super Friends well, in that she correctly assessed that they needed pizza after their defeat.
BUT BRAINY JUST RUINED THAT PIZZA BY HOISTING THE BOX VERTICALLY BOY WHAT ARE YOU DOING????
And J’onn. DEAR J’ONN. CELESTIAL FATHER. DEEPLY CONCERNED FOR THE SAFETY OF HIS KIDDO.
*through the tears* We love to see it. 
Okay, backtracking a little...
It’s not intentional, but I kinda chuckled, because after everyone being like, ‘The Phantom Zone is hell!!!’ all throughout the episode, it was funny that Nia dreamt of a giant ���Midvale High School’ sign while trying to find Kara in the simulation. Like, yes, actually, High School is Hell.
Again, not what they were going for, but. Still. Funny.
Oh! Also! Brainy’s pep talk with Nia was very nice! 
“She’s more than just Supergirl. She’s Kara. She’s our beacon through the darkness.”
*with quiet reverence* Yeah.
Also loved the reminder that the Legion is inspired not by Superboy, but by Supergirl in this universe. 
We didn’t have a ton of Will content but I like what we got! 
Okay, time to talk about Kara.
OUR POOR KID.
But also yes, yes, what a beautiful statement on Kara as a character, and what motivates her. What pushes her forward.
Kara fights. Kara is not content to sit around and...how does she phrase it. ‘Exist for the sake of it.’ She does not allow the difficulties she’s faced in life to stop her. 
The fandom always wants her to dwell on her anger and sadness but that’s just not WHO SHE IS as a character. She told J’onn, waaaaaaay back in season one, AND I QUOTE:
“I lost everything. It makes a hole in your heart, but you can’t fall into it. You have to fill it. You have to fight.”
So I’m sorry, fandom, but your cries of OOC and whatnot are just. Incorrect.
And then there’s the Phantom showdown which is fine (we get a nice pep talk from Alex) and SPEAKING OF, towards the end of the episode, we get...
ALEX’S FEEEEEEEELINGS
She’s feeling them and they hurt.
Like. A lot.
Also, saddest pile of potstickers.
(Thinking about Alex chucking the takeout container reminded me of the previous scene where Brainy also physically reacts and delivers the excellent line: These 21st century keyboards SUCK!)
(Yeah man, get a mechanical keyboard with cherry MX switches, none of that low profile membrane nonsense.)   
Overall, I really enjoyed this episode. It had more of that, ‘fresh’, new season feeling, and still maintained the Good Character Content. I’m wondering if maybe budget constraints due to Covid stuff will make for less action set pieces and more character stuff overall? That would be kind of nice! I guess we’ll see, going forward.
Just a few negatives, IMO: the dialogue kinda felt hit-or-miss. Like, there were some really wonderful, solid bits, but then you’d get some weird stuff that didn’t quite land right. Like, I watched this episode twice just to be sure I was catching everything/not missing something because I was tired and...IDK there was just some clunky stuff.
And I will admit that I agree with fandom on one thing: I did kinda want to see Alex tell Kelly. 
But, okay, having said that, I do not think it ruins the show, or that it’s disrespectful, or whatever other complaints fandom is inventing and screaming at the people running the social media accounts.
(The level of entitlement whilst we’re still in the MIDST OF A PANDEMIC is gross.) 
(Also their solution of, ‘just take time from this one character and give it to my fav!’ is obnoxious.) 
To loop it around back to something nice! I hope they continue to develop something with Kara and William. Even if it’s just as friends. (Which would be a cowardly cop-out! But I refuse to get my hopes up, given what happened with James.)
EITHER WAY, it would be really lovely to have a nice, chill situation where Kara could reveal her identity to someone because she wants to tell them.
SO ANYWAYS
Yeah! Good ep! I liked it! 
Do we think Sad Dad is the Real Deal? OR a nefarious Phantom fabricating a friendly, familiar, familial face? I guess we’ll see!
Next week: GET IN LOSERS, WE’RE GOING PHANTOM HUNTING. 
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popculturebuffet · 3 years
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Amphiba: True Colors Review or FINALLY THE  FINALE
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We’re finally here all you happy people! Ten Months, 36 episodes, 20 half hours, a lot of gay subtext, a lot of bloodshed, and a lot of build up have lead us all here! One absolutely STUFFED finale: A trust is betrayed, a rebllion is had, a conquerer rises and NOTHING will ever be the same.. and yes htat’s thrown around a lot but this is one of those times where NOTHING WILL BE THE SAME. This is that kind of finale folks. 
But before I can get into all the juicy stuff you’ve been waiting for there’s a few things to discuss.. and the first is obviously the fact we had to wait three goddamn extra weeks to get here after spending all season leading up to this. 
You all know the story by now. Hell I even angirly ranted about it when it happened and rightfully so. But frankly the colossal delay is going to be such an integral and permeant part of this episode and this show’s history that not talking about it in this review would do it a diservice: So to recap: The finale was posted to air  May 1st, a weak after “The Dinner/Battle of the Bands”. I had it set in my schedule, it showed up in that month’s press release of Disney Channel Episodes, We were all ready to go with all the tight and intense build up leading up to this. 
Then the worst happened and Disney aburbtly, and with a funny face image trying to play it off as a joke annoucned via it’s animation twitter the episode would be delayed. Now in fairness to the twitter person there, they were PROBABLY trying to help massage a blow... but seriously dude, read the room next time.  Thankfully creator Matt Braly stepped in and explained it was technical delays. After what happened the next day I ASSUMED he was just trying to cover for them as it would turn out the episode was finished.. turns out, and I had to edit the review to reflect this the truth was somewhere in the middle. Edits were more discussed, likely due to the episodes very violent nature, and the episode was given a content warning. Given what happens.. I can’t blame Disney for wanting one or for thinking of editing it.. but canblamehtem for the “Things that could’ve been brought to my attention YESTERDAY’ nature of the edist and the insuing delay. 
I can also blame them for leaking the episode on ITUNES. Yeah if they were REALLY concenred abotu content then they would’ve held off longer and not brought this up five minutes before it aired, delaying the episode for many. Hell I DEFENEDED them in the original version of this, but they had MONTHS of this episode being in production to fucking say something. WHy do this five mintues before it’s finished? 
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It just smacks of laziness and overly panicy stuff. A content warning would’ve been FINE. You ahve it for racisim on Disney Plus, just put one here and call it a day. You haven’t objected to the horrifying content in the series up to this point why start NOW.  And they STILL never apologized. For any of this. For the leak, for the delay, never properly explaining the delay (Matt didn’t either.. but given how twitchy comapnies can be about what their creators say, I can’t blame him for not wanting to clarify it was a post credit’s thing till closer to airtime), just in general not giving a shit abotu the kids or adults watching this. Just because kids watch thiis dosen’t me older kids don’t have social media, and it dosen’t mean teens don’t. If you want to pretend us adults watching this don’t exist.. fine. It sucks but I can’t do anything. But do not do this shit to kids and then not go to them. And again Matt could’ve.. but it’s not his fucking job. His job is to make a show, help make sure it gets to air and be a sweeheart. YOURS is to make sure things run smoothly and when their is a hickup,get your house in order. 
Matt shoudln’t of HAD to beg people not to watch it. Various va’s for the show shoudln’t of HAD to record funny messages.. it was appricated but it’s not thier job to prevent this from spreading. It’s yours. It’s yours to open your damn eyes and see adults and older teens watch this stuff too and to head that shit off. This incident is going to stick in my craw for god knows how long and ALMOST convinced me not to cover Owl House weekly (I still woud’ve likely done a review on each half of the season). I ended up renegeing on that and will be starting regular coverage of that in June and continuing coverage of this show whenever it returns.. but it was close. 
And it’s ultimately YOU GUYS that kept me hanging in there. It was thanks to a Disney show this blog exists in the first place, and contiunes to get the bulk of it’s viewers. It’s how I got my patreon, biggest fan and bfinacial backer Kev. I’ts why I can do what I love, talking about and analyzing stuff I enjoy and ocasionally loathe. You guys came back week after week for my ducktales reviews and stayed for Amphibia. I”m sure i’ll get even more for Owl House. It’s thanks to all of you I can keep going despite the hardships, the lack of patreons, the long nights, the weird sleep schedules. I wouldn’t of made it through 20 weeks of awesome tv without you. So for you, and for myself, i’ll hang in there but I expect better Disney. And i’m damn well gonna get it. So join me under the cut as the world turns upside down.. and there are a LOT of spoilers. Seriously if you want to wait for the tv airing do not go under the cut
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So we open with a flashback to 8 months ago, the day all this began: Marcy was working in the library on her cram classes, getting texts from both Sasha, who was excited about Anne’s birthday, and her own father who wants her to come home right away as there’s something important they need to discuss. 
But before she can a book about the strange and what not naturally slips out and Mar-Mar can’t help but thumb through it.. and as you were no doubt dreading.. finds the box which is said in a large tv friendly caption to lead to other worlds. 
Naturally Marcie is intrigued and snaps a pick and heads home... and we cut to the END of that conversation as she tearfully runs out of the house , refusing to accept what they’ve told her and her dad coming off hella unsympathetic with his overly harsh tone, especially since we DO find out what he told her... and it’s a lot to put on her and a lot to just say “accept because I helped make you for all of two unsatisfying minutes. “ 
So while running away she passes the box.. and sets the events from both the show’s opening and the flashback from the last finale in motion. Marcy sent them here on purpose.
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Yeah needless to say I DIDN’T see this coming. And it seems obvious in hindsight: Marcy being the one most desperate to keep thier friendship together, as we’ll see at it’s worst through this episode, her barely mentioning going home, and most tellingly the only things she talks about from earth were Anne, Sasha and her dorky intrests. All the things closest to the heart and that she’s most likely to make out with.. but while Anne brings up earth stuff every so often even after getting more screen time in Season 2b... Marcy NEVER talks about that kind of stuff. She has her girlfriends and a real life fantasy novel right here... but she DOSEN’T miss her parents or earth itself. And given her life was already shown to be as an outcast with only two people carring about her, three with her mom now we know, who never REALLY fit in and whose on friends very clearly didn’t share her intrests.. it probably made it all the more tempting: a real adventure, an escape from her problems, and a way to start over: become who she always PLAYED and not who she was. Everything just.. snaps into place with this revelation and makes Marcy an all the more heartbreaking character... even more so soon enough when we find out what her overall plan was. 
But that’s half an episode away: for now our party returns on Joe to Newtopia.. though clumsly. Marcy admits that they probably can’t fit more people on him. But with this our heroes are ready to finish this story and with a plan since obviously they can’t just walk into town with two wanted crminals: Marcy will present the box and THEN sasha and grime, who will cloak themselves to avoid attracting attentions, with literal cloaks Marcy hasn’t made a cloaking device yet, so hopefully they’ll get a pardon. 
Inside Sprig and Anne talk, with Sprig admitnig he’s sad this is the last adventure.. but Anne has hope. After all they have a way home now and that portal goes both ways. She can hop back any time and vice versa. This sin’t goodbye.. it’s just goodbye for now. And i’ts something I genuinely didn’t think of.. and not just because Andrias’ shady actions and Sasha and Grime’s machinations meant this was NEVER going to end well. 
Speaking of Sasha and Grime’s machinations those come to a head: As our heroes enter the castle, greeted by Lady Olivia, and we get our typical end of the RPG speech from the “Good” king.... Sasha swipes the box and Grime uses the hammer to knock everyone off ballance. The coup the two have been cooking up has come to pass. 
Anne and Marcy’s reactions.. are telling: Anne is utterly pissed at the betryal and done with Sasha and Marcy is begging both sides to stop as this was not how it was supposed to end. Sasha tries to use a box as a baranging chip, and plans to destroy it if Andrias dosen’t surrender despite destroying her way home. Given it’s implied her home life isn’t great either and she gets to rule an empire instead of a school, it’s easy to see why. 
Grime stops him from calling her bluff though by wacking him in the shins and then hodling him at hammer point to get the military of Newtopia to stand down while his covert Toad agents reveal themselves and runamuck. Grime has won. 
Anne meanwhile is livid, with Sasha not quite getting why MAYBE Anne would once again feel betrayed that once again Sasha is trying to do everything her way and once again lied to her and harmed innocent people. Anne breaks off their friendship which deeply uspets Marcy.. who weirldy. ISN’T trying to talk Sasha out of this. After all she gets what she wanted anyway. She IS upset when Sasha tries to send them home for defiance.. but the box dosen’t work for her and she simply has the guards escort our heroes and Olivia out till she can figure this out. 
Naturally though Anne, being pissed, heartbroken and pissed, and yes that was indeed intentional, HEADBUTTS the nearest guard and breaks them out, with the planatrs starting to fight back. Their still outnumbered.. but help arrives 
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Or rather the Amphibia equilvent as both wolverines are busy with prep for the Hellfire Gala. Yes it’s General Yunan, who Lady Olivia cuts off probably not for the first time. Your lucky that’s one of her turn on’s lady.
So our heroes sneak out and head to Sals, while the Toads wreck up the town. Marcy... is of course desperate to fix things, but figures it’s easy. All they have to do is free the king, stop the rest of the army from arriving, their an hour away, and cementing grime’s foothold, get her girlfriends to reconcile and fix the inherent power imbalance so a rebellion doesn’t’ happen again. 
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But Anne rouses them: They may be a goofus, a quick witted kid, an out of touch old man, a literal baby, am etaphorical baby, and a nerd.. but their a BADASS Goofus, kid, old man, babies and nerd... and two other ladies the toads actually know and respect. They’ve fought worse: Canibals, princess bride references, theater bandits, chicken elder gods, Poly’s addiction to angry mobs and paste pot pete and come back stronger each time. They can do this. They might only be 8 strangers, but together they can fuck up this shit. or to have a previously mentioned buddy of mine sum it up
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So with that it’s time to split up gang: Marcy, Hop Pop and Olivia will go free the king using Hop Pop’s acting skills...which actually works despite Olvia’s doubts. Polly, Yunan and Frobo will put the hammer down and give them hell, taking out the toads in the city and drawing all of them away from the gate where Spriganne will trigger it thus saving the day. 
Meanwhile Sasha is feeling discontent. She got everything she wanted.. but she didn’t think about what to DO with all that power. At home she could do all sorts of things ruling a school but now she’s lost one of the loves of her life. Without Anne and Marcy i’ts just empty. Even Grime’s utterly heartfelt gift of an emerald sword, he knew she always wanted to duel wield that has a heron on it, a sign of how they met and a truly sweet gesture can’t cheer her up. So Grime suggests redecorating and the first thing to go is a sappy mural of Andrias and his subjects. What they find UNDER it though is horrifying.. and i’ts surprisingly not a bunch of spiders like you’d expect.. but a mural of Andrius as some sort of horrible king with an army of robot frogs like Frobo, with a LOT of frog, toad and newt skeletons piled up. Sasha and Grime are glad they dodged that bullet.. only to find Anne scaling the tower with Sprig, the two naturally going to stop them.
 The two try and turn the wheel, but can’t as there’s a doorstop... one they DEFINTELY saw earlier when looking out the window of Sal’s.
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Regardless they send Polly for that.. and the rematch begins. Sasha TRIES talking to Anne.. but given she stabbed her in the back AGAIN for incredbly petty reasons, that’s not going to work and the two get one hell of a fight. Beautifully animated and rife with emotion as the two clash with Sasha DESPERATLY trying to get Anne to stop for a second and listen and Anne rightly refusing, while we watching know our hero winning will spell DOOM for this world despite her trying to do the right thing. Anna and Brenda’s acting here is just TOP notch. In any other episode this would be the best part of it.. but we’re only getting warmed up.
While they fight, we get a surprising and awesome bout I did not see coming: Sprig Vs Grime. And it gives me Spider-Man vs Kingpin vibes really: A rotund but still far more powerful opponent versus a smaller but quicker one. And that’s how even more shockingly, Sprig comes out the WINNER. While Grime has the hammer and more strength and skill... Sprig has speed and thus gets Grime to whack himself with it. Granted he can’t use the thing and comically spins around afterword.. but it proves Grime’s racist thoughts about frogs wrong and leaves Anne free to turn the wheel once she beats Sasha. The invasion is thwarted.
But naturally given the ooky spooky mural and the other hints of ominous shit like the watcher with a thousand eyes, this isn’t the end. Back at the throne room, with Sasha and Grime as prisoners Anne gives Andrias the box despite sasha begging her not to. But rather than send her home right away.. he has a history lesson for her first. And nothing good ever starts with someone delaying helping you to give a sinister history lesson let me tell you.
We find out the while truth: Amphibia was once a technological empire powered by the box, and prosperity SEEMINGLY reigned, and Andrias, much like our heroines, had two close friends, a toad and a frog. But one day they betrayed him, abandoning him and seemingly stealing the box , leaving his mechanical marvels powerless and Andrias bitter and angry. Hence the whole revenge ploy. 
In an unsurprising and invincible-esque twist, he reveals his ancestors were not explorers but CONQUERERS and he intends to finish their work, placing the box on a pedestal that turns his castle into a flying fortress glowing blue. It only gets worse from there: the castle’s awakening also activates factories around Amphibia similar to the one we saw back in “Fort in the Road” that gave us Frobo and it turns out their dark purpose.. is to create armies of unstoppable soldiers to secure his dominon.... and spread it to the other worlds. The reason he didn’t send the girls home is he figures correctly Anne and the others will try and stop him from TAKING it. 
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So yeah Anne’s reaction is very naturally...
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And despite being outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered and outplanned she plans to make an all out stand. She realizes that her own fight with Sasha only allowed something FAR WORSE to take hold. She’s not WRONG for fighting her, Sasha was being a shithead taking over and did so for flimsy and selfish reasons and she had no reason to listen to her.. but had she at least thought over giving him the box and not simply given it to him to spite her none of this would be happening. So she and the plantars get ready for round 2, with Sasha having her back this time, and Grime having Sasha’s. It’s a really sweet moment, showing Sasha has realized just how much her own greedy and controlling ambitions have cost her and that she’s brought about something far worse thorugh them, and is ready to make amends and Grime as always ready to stand by the only true family he has. 
But before the carnage can begin.. Marcy stops them... and then tearfully turns to Andrias “This wasn’t our deal!”. Andrias, now not having to play nice, dosen’t care and cruelly points out of course he did: He would’ve said whatever it took to get her to fill the box and she did it. He also hints at Marcy’s dark secret, with both girls wondering what the hell he’s on about.. but clearly starting to piece it together, with Andrias cruelly toying with Marcy to tell them before he does.. and barely gives her any time before going ahead with it anyway, knowing she’d be unable to. And with this we get the best line of the episode and Keith david’s best delivery.. and given he makes a fucking seven course meal of the entire second act, yeah that’s a high bar.
"Did it ever occur to you — Anne, Sasha — that one of you knew more than she was letting on? That one of you might've gotten you stranded in Amphibia... on purpose?"
The line itself hits like a sledgehammer. We knew for the full episode she did this on purpose.. but we also knew at some point it was clearly going to come out and hurt them both.. and to see someone Marcy clearly saw as a better replacement dad, someone she thought cared about her and was offering her her dreams for no gain on his end cruelly tell them clearly for his own amusment as he dosen’t remotely see them as a threat.. it’s utterly chilling as it is heartbreakiing and horrifying. 
Naturally Anne and Sasha are upset, Sasha a bit baffled and Anne just utterly broken by this: She’d already been betrayed TWICE by the other love of her life.. now MARCY had betrayed her.. and WORSE? 
And it only gets worse as Marcy heartbreakingly reveals her motivation and what this was really all about: Her dad announced he got a new job and they were moving a state away.. and like I said he’s a prick. Not for moving, that happens and it sucks but for having no freaking empathy about it. Maybe if he took a parenting class earth wouldn’t be on the cusp of a robot invasion. Marcy was about to loose her girls and was desperate.... so naturally Andrias claimed to simply want to take them all with him on his journeys, obviously leading out the conquest and likely genocide part, so they could go on and on FOREVER. And this whole thing gave Anne the plantars so it’s not all bad right? Right? But it’s clear she’s trying to desperatly lie to herself this was all okay as she’s been doing ever since she started this all 8 months ago and Anne pointing out she misses her family, something Marcy never considered given her own reasons for leaving and how Sasha likely dosen’t have a happy family life herself. 
This.. this is Haley Tju’s finest hour. She’s done good voice work before, especially in this series but here, with Marcy’s anguish, desperation and guilt all leaking out as she tries to get her girlfriend not to turn away from her. it’s all just amazing heartbreaking stuff and I salute her and the animation does her fine acting a service and shows every bit of pain in the poor girls face. 
Anne naturally does turn away a bit and Marcy cries.. but Anne quickly recovers... while she obviously isn’t entirely ready to forgive Marcy JUST yet, it’s clear she wasn’t thinking straight and did all of this out of desperation... and that the hulking dickbag who betrayed them all and is gloating about all of this manipulated her, preying on her desperation and anguish to finish his plan.  Marcy fucked up big time, no question.. but ANDRIAS is the true monster here, and if he’s not stopped this world she’s grown to love and the one she left behind will BURN. Anne may be many things: impulsive, kinda weird, easy to anger.. but she is over all that a HERO. And there’s a villian to stop
Andrias, while not seeing them as remotely a threat, does admit this will probably be fun and the fight begins, with our heroes, including Marcy, easily besting the Obsdian Swarm.. as i’m calling them now. It’s a cools equence.. but ultimately futile. Andrias is FAR more powerful than he’s let on with the box. And shows it off by destroying toad tower before coming at them with a fire sowrd, easily swatting them aside like flies. They try their best to fight back but it’s not much use, and Andrias NEARLY crushes polly to death under his fist. Yes a fucking child. What a dick. 
Frobo saves him... and sadly this is the end for our new friend as Andrias is mildly amused that one of his creations glitched.. then smashes him into robotic paste. Polly rightfully calls him a monster and his response is as chilling as it is wonderfully dickish: “Don’t worry, your next”. 
Thankfully though she got out of the way.. because she has LEGS now. It’s also why I keep saying 8 months, though it’s likely more like 9 given it took a month to get to newtopia: 
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The prophecy has come true! And while she stumbles for a second Polly quickly proves she can really move, she has an attitude and she’s the fastest thing alive by grabbing the box seemingly winning.. except Andrias has sprig in his fist and is going to crush or drop him ulness she stops. And despite Sprig BEGGING his sister to let him go for the sake of everyone else, like any good hero she naturally puts the box back. 
Anne begs for him to let Sprig go since he got what he wanted and he’s her best friend in this or any world... but all this does is insprie Andrias to DROP HIM OUT A WINDOW, bitter over his own past and eager to torture her some more. This really shows off who Andrias REALLY is now the mask is off; a sadistic tyrannical bully who relishes in making his victims really squirm, revels in malevolence and is just so damn gleeful about it: Not to say BIll Cipher levels more of a cold, cruel enjoyment of things. 
As I said earlier Keith David makes a motherfucking Seven Course Meal out of the second half of this episode, utterly stealing the show now he can play Andrias as he truly is: not skulng in the shadows with ominus hints he’s evil or pretending to be nice, but instead as a sadistic brute who delights in suffering and wants nothing less than everything under his boothill. in short he’s an AWESOME antagonist and while Keith David has played TREMENDOUS villains before, this one will easily be his best if the writing holds. Andrias is Keith David at his fucking best and proves the Disney legend has EVEYRTHING left in the tank even as he approaches 70′s. Jesus I fucking love this man. 
So this causes anne to retreat into herself, leaving us in a black void as Anne remembers all the good times.. and goes MOTHERFUCKING SUPER SAYIAN. Well more accurately super sayian god super sayian, or blueper sayian if you will, but still i’ts a n utterly striking sequence and a clear direct shout out with Anne getting her powers the same way Goku did: loosing someone to an utterly cruel bastard. Same with Gohan’s upgrade to super sayian 2. It’s just a truly striking sequence as she powers up in a FULL rage, DEMANDNIG he give him back. 
Andrais is stunned, clearly knowing this was something she was capable of but thought she could no longer do as the box shoudlv’e drained her of the ablility, while Hop Pop and Grime wonder if this is a human thing. 
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So Anne WAILS on the fucker, easily besting a shocked andrias despite his best attempts.. but she tires out and he swats her aside, gleefully noting she dosen’t know how to control it. Sprig turns out to be okay though. Marcy went and saved him while Anne was rippig Andrias asunder.. and then activates the box. Sasha and Grime hold him off while Anne makes a run for it with the plantars while Andrias gives out your standard villian big no. Anne and Fam make it... but Marcy is taking a sec.. and that second gets her GUTTED. Not an exageration or me being a smart ass like usual.. Andrias RAN HER THROUGH WITH HIS SWORD. 
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His only response is “Look what you made me too and Anne and crew are warped away, unable to save her. 
So we end with our heroes landing somewhere and Sprig wondering where they are... where they are is on the top of a car on a busy Los Angeles Freeway... and in front of two very weirded out humans. Anne is home. 
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So now for the part that wasn’t in the original release apparently: The teaser.. aka THE MOTHERFUCKING SEASON 3 OPENING. 
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Hell. Yes. Just a few quick personal notes before we hit the wrap up: I love how the season will be on earth, a nice change of pace, how the Boonchuy’s have very clearly warmly welcomed the plantars, the expanded cast at the title card, and how Disney just let them go ALL out for this one. They’ve clearly stopped being cheap assholes when it comes to letting intro’s change or at the very least got this was the very end of the series and thus important enough to gussie up. But yes the end is nigh.. and probably not till late this year if this year AT ALL And I will return for it. Well return to doing this show anyway, i’m not going anywhere. They’ll have to pry this blog from my cold dead hands. 
Final Thoughts:
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This episode is the series best so far. My only honest complaint is the Toad Invasion comes and goes really quickly and I question why it was crammed into half the episode. Don’t get me wrong, Andrias’ rise needed the full 10 minutes, but I question why we dind’t get an episode before this settingit up and THEN have it happen over half an episode, epsecially since we spent an entire episode on getting the other toad barons involved only for ONE of them to show up for all of five minutes. 
Otherwise though? Yeah no notes. The cast is at the top of their damn game, with Brenda Song, Hailey Tju and Keith Motherfucking David as the standouts, the animatoin is likewise, and it pays off a thing or two you wouldn’t expect like the acting episode. This is a truly outstanding finale, one that has now joined other all time faviorite season finales such as “You’re In Control”, “Reunited”, “The Crossroads of Destiny”, and “Moonvasion”. I will be watching this again when it comes to Disney Plus. Masterful stuff.
As for the season as a whole.. this was a great season. While it did start a bit rocky with the road trip arc, which I’m still not a huge fan of as I feel it mostly wasted an awesome idea of them going on a world spanning roadtrip with some fairly weak episodes, with the exception of standouts “Truckstop Polly” and “Wax Museum”. 
But once we got to Netwopia it got better, with better spotlight episodes, the pacing picking up and Marcy joining our merry crew. And it hit it’s peak with the second half of the season: the return to wartwood effortlessly combined slice of life with the compelling temple episodes. It was also a nice break before the utter hell that arrived in the finale, but still nicely lead up to said finale.  This season may of STARTED bumpy but it finished at it’s highest point and with one epic finale to go it’s only going to get better from here. 
As for this blog the same holds true: Review wise next week i’ll be taking a break from normal reviews to do a week’s worth of Goofy based content in time for his birthday, from shorts, to goof troop, to hosue of mouse, to an obscure special, all leading up to the Disney Classic A Goofy Movie. So stick around.
And if that dosen’t do it for you I have an ongoing retrospective on the story arcs of ducktales season 2, i’m nearing the end of one on Scott Pilgrim and in the middle of one of The Life and Times of Scrogoe McDuck. and if you prefer weekly reviews, as I mentioned earlier offhandidly i’ll be covering the Owl House! LIke Amphibia i’m starting with Season 2, but just like with this show i’m excited as all hell and hope you’ll join me. And if you need even more I have a patreon, patreon.com/popculturebuffet, where I have exclusive reviews if you choose to back me as well as exciting stretch goals, one of which down the line is reviewing season one of this very show. So join it and if not that’s okay too, either way.. it’s been a pleasure. 
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maybeimamuppet · 3 years
Text
in her pride
happy Wednesday and happy pride, friends! this is a request fill for @jusanotherconfusedfangirl who requested our art freaks and Elijah attending pride!
trigger warnings for:
homophobia
one use of d-slur
panic attacks
I think that's everything, but as always please let me know if I've missed something and I will add it in.
enjoy!
-
“Hey, Peanut,” Janis greets as Cady leaps into her arms. “You look cute!”
“Thanks!” Cady chirps happily. She does look rather adorable in her shorts and tank top combo, complete with bi flag suspenders and a matching headband. She also found bi flag socks and stole a pair of Janis’ boots. Cady pulls back to see Janis’ outfit too. “Wow. You look… really good.”
“Why thank you,” Janis purrs. She’s in her usual shorts and tights, but this time has a lesbian flag t-shirt and matching socks poking out from her own boots. She does a spin to show off her outfit, revealing that one the pockets of her shorts has also been painted with the many orange and pink stripes of her flag, and her infamous ‘female power’ painting done in miniature on the other. “Come on.”
Cady follows her into the house and up to her room. Julie waves as they pass her open door. She’s got on a rainbow shirt in solidarity, but wouldn’t be joining them on their little excursion.
“Do you want your flag painted on your face?” Janis asks, pointing to her own cheek decorated with yet another lesbian flag. Cady nods excitedly, so Janis gestures for her to sit across from her on the bed and grabs her paints and a brush.
“What’s it going to be like?” Cady asks as Janis tenderly brushes a thick stripe of blue onto her cheek.
“Loud,” Janis replies immediately. “In a lot of ways. There’s gonna be a lot of bright colors, obviously, and a lot of noise. And probably a few weird smells.”
“Okay,” Cady chuckles gently so she doesn’t mess Janis up.
“It’s a lot of fun, though. You’ll get to see and meet all sorts of people who’ve been through and experienced all sorts of things,” Janis says. “You’ll love it.”
“I’m so excited,” Cady says happily as Janis finishes brushing magenta on top of her purple stripe. “When did you start going?”
“Ninth grade,” Janis says quietly. “Damian and I went with our moms.”
“Aww,” Cady coos. “You sound sad.”
“I’m… I don’t know,” Janis says. “It was a great thing overall that year, but I had an… ordeal, let’s say, with a group of protestors there. I’m still not sure how I feel about that Pride as a whole.”
“Oh,” Cady frowns. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not right now,” Janis says. “It’s your first pride, let’s just focus on that for today. I’ll tell you some other time.”
“Okay,” Cady says. “You look good in warm colors, you should wear them more often.”
“You think?” Janis chuckles, putting her hands on her hips and striking a pose. “Haven’t worn this much pink since I was a Plastic.”
“Love, you wore that pink shirt so many times during our junior year,” Cady says. “And last year, too.”
“What pink shirt?” Janis asks in confusion. “I don’t have any pink clothes.”
Cady heads over to her closet and pulls out the two-toned pink striped shirt, a dress with pink flowers, and a pink sweater.
“Then what color are these?” She asks, holding them up to show off.
Janis goes very quiet and purses her lips. “Diet red. I don’t wear pink.”
Cady bursts out laughing and comes to kiss her cheek. “You’re allowed to wear pink if you want, lovey. It suits you.”
“Humph,” Janis grumbles. “Do you have everything you need?”
“I think so,” Cady says. “Sunscreen and sunglasses, ear defenders, hats, water, snacks, phone, ponchos, flags.”
“Sounds good to me,” Janis says. “Dame and Elijah should be here in a few minutes and then we can go.”
“Yay,” Cady says happily, coming to straddle her girlfriend for cuddles.
-
Sure enough, Damian and Elijah come quite literally parading into the room about ten minutes later, having let themselves into Janis’ house. Cady and Janis are more than a little concerned when they hear Julie yell “Oh my god!”
Until they see what she’s on about. Damian is looking… colorful in a full rainbow outfit, complete with cloud hat, bright red lipstick and wearing a trans pride flag as a cape. Elijah is entirely topless but in a rainbow skirt, long and made of tulle. He’s also wearing a flag cape, but his is the demisexual flag. He has a fan in each hand. One says ‘Oh honey’ with a bee pattern on it and the other appears to say ‘Power bottom’. Janis gags a little as he hands the latter back to Damian.
“Jesus Christ, guys,” Janis laughs. “Looking good.”
“Whoa,” Cady blinks. “I want a cape!”
“Do you have a flag?” Damian asks. Cady nods and grabs her larger bi flag that she’d impulse-bought a while ago out of her bag. He takes it and ties it loosely around her neck to match them. Once she has her cape, Cady does a superhero pose with her hands on her hips and her chin jutted out proudly.
“Bi-der girl,” Janis mumbles under her breath. Cady hears her and laughs, nodding in agreement.
“Can we go now pleeeease? I’m so excited,” Cady begs, tugging on Janis’ hand to get her to stand up.
“Yes, we can, easy,” Janis laughs. “Save your energy.”
“She’s got plenty,” Damian chuckles. “Let’s go, E can drive us there.”
—————
“Whoa,” Cady says in awe, looking around at all the bright rainbows and fun outfits surrounding them. They got a spot near the start of the parade, to get the best goodies. “Is that person-“
“Naked? Probably,” Janis finishes as Cady trails off. “There’s a lot of different things people are here for, some are a little ‘out there’ even for me.”
“Hm,” Cady hums thoughtfully. “Fun!”
“Just wait ‘til it starts, Butterfly,” Janis says, kissing her cheek. Cady flinches a little when the screaming begins along with the parade, and Janis quickly realizes she can’t see much. Cady accepts the offered perch on Janis’ back and watches like that, waving at people passing by and catching them a few of whatever is flung their way.
By the time the last few floats and groups have gone by, Janis is almost totally covered in all sorts of rainbow and pride accoutrements. Necklaces, other beads, candy, flags, and even some condoms.
“That was awesome!” Cady squeals in her ear. “What now?”
“Now we get to walk around and enjoy it,” Janis responds, following Damian and Elijah down the street. “Ooh, cupcakes.”
Cady is glad Janis seems to have forgotten she’s still on her back, since it means she doesn’t have to walk around. Janis buys them each a cupcake with their respective pride flag frosted on top, and Cady climbs down to dig in happily.
“Ooh, mine is funfetti!” She says around a mouthful, showing Janis her cupcake with the bite missing.
“I think mine is strawberry,” Janis says around some of her own, showing off the pink center to hers. Cady cheekily leans in and takes a bite of it. “Hey!” Janis leans in and takes a bite of Cady’s. “You got frosting on your nose.”
Cady crosses her eyes to see, and sure enough, there is a little bit of purple frosting from her cupcake on her nose. She pokes her tongue out to try to get it, but Janis kisses it away instead. Cady grins and clambers back onto her girlfriend’s back, peppering a few kisses over her cheeks.
“What’s that?” She asks, pointing to a group of people who seem to be doing some sort of craft as they listen to a local band on a stage nearby.
“I dunno, sometimes they have art stuff here. Do you want to go see? I think we’ve officially lost Dame and Elijah,” Janis says.
“How did we manage that? Damian is literally dressed as a whole rainbow,” Cady mutters confusedly.
“Exactly, it’s perfect camouflage,” Janis chuckles. “They’ll find us eventually, come on.”
Cady clings to her shoulders contently as she’s carried over to the area. A lady is running a booth there and explains they’re painting rocks to go in a garden outside the local LGBTQ+ youth shelter. People are painting anything from pride flags, to animals and other random things, to supportive messages on some of the larger ones. It’s free, so Janis grabs a few rocks for each of them and a paper plate with all sorts of colors of acrylic paint.
“So what do you think so far, Butterfly?” Janis asks as she gets to work painting a bee on one of her rocks.
“It’s fun! You were right, it’s loud, but it’s… safe feeling. A good loud,” Cady responds, deciding to do a rainbow lion, as a little nod to her pride of lions from Kenya. “And everything is so interesting, there’s so much here.”
“Good,” Janis replies, leaning in to kiss her cheek. Someone from one of the other blankets yells over that they make a cute couple, and they both call back a thank you with a giggle.
“And everyone is so nice, too,” Cady chuckles, brushing a streak of purple into her lion’s mane.
Once all their rocks have been thoroughly decorated with all sorts of flags and rainbows and messages, they return them to the booth to dry and be placed, and then head off to find another thing to do.
“Oh, there’s Damian,” Cady says, having been on her tippy toes and scanning the local area.
“Of course he found the food trucks,” Janis mumbles under her breath. She yelps slightly as Cady grabs her hand and starts running them in that direction.
By the time they make it to him, she’s thoroughly out of breath. Damian turns around at the sound of her panting and chuckles.
“Hey guys!” He greets. “I found tacos. You good, Jan?”
“Gimme,” Janis puffs, reaching for his slushee. He hands it over begrudgingly and lets her have a few gulps. “Ooh, blue raspberry. Thanks.”
“Get your own,” Damian whines. “They’re, like, two bucks.”
“And you owe me ten,” Janis shrugs. “Mine now.”
“Why does Damian owe you money?” Cady asks worriedly.
“I bet him ten bucks I could steal a sheep without being noticed,” Janis responds. “And then I did.”
“You-you-“ Cady stutters. “Wh-what-why- why did you-“
“Good job, Janis, you broke your girlfriend,” Elijah chuckles.
“I put it back after,” Janis says, as if that makes anything better. Cady is still stuttering over several questions. “I named him Walter.”
Cady just blinks and then sighs, leaning her head against Janis’ shoulder. “Stop stealing livestock. Just leave them alone.”
“I didn’t steal the cows! Or the chickens,” Janis defends quickly. “And the sheep was fine. I just borrowed him for a second. Also, did you know sheep are not as soft as you would think? They’re very scratchy.”
“There’s a reason I can’t wear wool,” Cady chuckles in response. “Now get us some tacos, you heathen.”
Janis pouts, but does head up to the window to order them some food. Cady takes hers and leads them all over to a picnic table nearby, trying to navigate around the sticky soda spills and leftover gum.
Elijah tells them about the clothing and accessory booths set up a ways away, showing them all the cool pride necklaces he had purchased along with a few t-shirts. In return, Cady points out the cupcake place back closer to the beginning. Damian suddenly looks much more excited than he did a second ago.
“They’re really good! Mine was funfetti, and Janis let me try some of her strawberry one,” Cady says.
“I didn’t let you, you stole a bite,” Janis retaliates. “Don’t twist this story.”
“And you took some of mine,” Cady argues jokingly. “You would’ve given me a bite anyway.”
“No I wouldn’t! You’re a thief,” Janis says. Damian and Elijah both shoot her a look. “What?”
To prove her point, Cady juts out her bottom lip and blinks at her pleadingly. “Jayjay, can I pleeeease have a bite of your taco?”
“This is a trap, this is a trap,” Janis whispers to herself, trying her hardest to resist. Cady takes it up a notch and leans into her shoulder, blinking those long eyelashes at her adorably. “Fine!”
Cady laughs victoriously and steals her bite. “I told you. I have the power.”
“Outside the bedroom, maybe,” Janis mutters crankily. “Ow!”
“Janis Sarkisian,” Cady scolds, whacking her arm once more. “We just got a whole intervention a couple weeks ago, did you not learn your lesson about keeping things private?”
“I was joking, ow!” Janis laughs. “Stop hitting me, I’m sorry. I gave you my taco.”
Cady chuckles. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have hit you. I love you.”
Janis grins again as Cady cuddles back into her shoulder. “I love you too.”
Damian shoots them a warning look, so Janis restrains herself to one kiss against Cady’s hair and less aggressive cuddling than she wants.
They finish their food and sit there chatting for a while before Cady pipes up again. “I’m bored, can we go find something else to do?”
“Sure, Cads,” Damian chuckles. “Come on, there’s some photo booth thingies this way.”
Cady says, “Ooh!” excitedly at the same time Janis gives a groan, but they both follow Damian and Elijah regardless. “Jayjay, it’ll be fun! Oh, look at all the backdrops, they’re huge!”
Janis can’t help but smile at her excitement, remembering the joy she felt at her own first pride. Cady takes all sorts of selfies and pictures with her little squad at every flag backdrop, even the ones nobody in their group belong to. They are all very pretty and do make excellent photo backdrops.
Janis takes some of just Cady in front of the bi flag pasted to the side of a building. Cady smiles happily at her and does a few poses. Damian cheers her on from the sidelines before joining her for a few more. Janis smiles even more. She and Damian are and always will be platonic soulmates, but he and Cady have something special too.
Cady eventually comes back to her girlfriend after no fewer than fifty pictures. Some Plastic habits have taken longer to fade than others. “Do you want any of you?”
“Nah, I’m good. Thanks, Peanut,” Janis says. She’s perfectly content to peruse their group shots or the photos of Cady, she’s never been one to enjoy taking pictures of just herself. “I’m in plenty of the group ones.”
“Okay,” Cady says. “What do you want to do? You’ve just been following me around so far.”
“No, I got the cupcakes,” Janis reminds her. “And you’ve picked good stuff to do. Let’s go check out the shopping stands, though, they usually have good stuff.”
Cady nods and takes her hand. Damian and Elijah realize they’re leaving and follow after them at a slight distance. Cady looks around curiously at all the rainbows and other color schemes in various forms around them. “I’ve never felt so… safe. Or secure in my sexuality,” she says quietly as they pass under a rainbow balloon structure.
“Good. That’s how it’s supposed to feel,” Janis says back with a smile. It quickly fades. “Too good to last.”
“What?” Cady asks. Janis points to a crowd of religious protestors nearby, holding signs with all sorts of cruel phrasing on them. “Oh.”
“Just ignore them for now, unless they start getting physical or go after someone young,” Janis shrugs, turning to browse some pride earrings. Cady nods and follows.
She notices Janis tense up as they’re forced to get closer to keep browsing, so she squeezes her hand gently to comfort her. Janis squeezes back thankfully.
Cady and Janis manage to ignore them and continue browsing. Cady buys everyone scrunchies patterned with their respective flags. Elijah puts his on his wrist, but Damian goes the extra mile and manages to get a little ponytail together on top of his head.
He and Elijah continue walking around for a while, but Cady and Janis stay and find a place to sit. It’s quiet and peaceful as Cady braids Janis’ hair down her back and ties the end with her new scrunchie.
So quiet that Janis forgets where they are and who’s nearby, and leans in to kiss her. All she knows is Damian and Elijah aren’t particularly close by, so she has free reign to kiss her girlfriend as much as she wants.
She’s violently brought back to reality when she hears some yelling. All she can make out is the word ‘dykes’. And to make matters worse, her hand suddenly feels warm and wet. One of them spat on her.
Damian and Elijah make a return as they hear the slurs being yelled, and Janis runs to cuddle into Damian. Cady, however, is fuming.
Cady knows she’s not supposed to engage these people. It won’t change anything, and puts her at risk. But, as she sees Janis being led away by Damian apparently in tears, she can’t hold herself back. Elijah is waiting for her, and there’s plenty of safe people around.
“Listen up, you fucks!” She snaps, getting the mob’s attention. “You know damn well you don’t belong here. This is an event for us, to give us a safe space. You’re entitled to your opinions, but attacking my girlfriend is where I draw the fucking line. Fun fact, pride actually has two meanings. This, and a family of lions. I grew up surrounded by several prides. I know how they fight, how they protect each other. The same applies here. If you even think about doing anything to anyone here again, I’ll show you how a whole pride of lions fights. Now fuck off.”
Surprisingly, they listen and back down a little bit. They don’t leave like she had hoped, but deep down she knew they wouldn’t. They’re suddenly swarmed by other pride-goers, congratulating her on her speech and going to try to cover the signs of the protestors.
“Damn, Cady,” Elijah says lowly. “Nice.”
“They hurt Janis,” Cady growls furiously. “Where did they go?”
Elijah points to an alleyway and leads them to it, quickly revealing a sobbing Janis being cradled by Damian. Cady’s seen her like this a few times before. She’s having a panic attack.
“Oh, darling,” Cady breathes sadly, any trace of anger gone once she sees the state Janis is in. “I’m so sorry.”
Janis reaches for her, so Cady cuddles in by Damian and squishes Janis between them. Elijah waits a little bit away, but in earshot if they need him. Janis doesn’t know him as well and his presence seemed to be making her more upset.
Cady pulls her bag off her back and roots through it, pulling out a water bottle and one of the snacks she brought, Janis’ sunglasses, and her own ear defenders.
“Mpenzi, do you want to try these? You don’t have to, but they help me when I’m overwhelmed,” Cady says lowly, tenderly stroking over Janis’ braid. Janis nods with another burst of sobs, so Cady helps her get the sunglasses on without poking her eyes and gently pops on the headphones. “Deep breaths, love, everything’s okay.”
Janis continues weeping in their embrace, sniffling anxiously every once in a while and clinging to both of her comfort people. Cady usually would offer a calming strategy, but she gets a sense that this time it’s important for Janis to just get it out.
A few people pass by the alley and ask if she’s okay, but Elijah plays bodyguard and sends them on their way again with the assurance that they’re handling it.
Very, very gradually, Janis does calm down. She pulls the headphones down around her neck and tucks the sunglasses into her shirt, reaching for the water and snack.
Cady unscrews the lid and hands it over, but helps her hold it when she sees how violently Janis is still shaking. Janis downs a couple gulps and continues clutching it as she shifts off of Damian and closer to Cady.
“Can I kiss you? Here?” Cady asks, tapping Janis’ forehead. She doesn’t know what triggered this, yet, and she doesn’t want to overstep. But Janis nods, so she pulls her close and peppers kisses against her temple. “You’re okay now, they’re gone.”
Elijah gets a little closer now that Janis is no longer in tears, sitting across the alley against the other wall.
“Did they-did they do anything? To you?” Janis chokes quietly, checking over Cady for any injuries and her face for any hint of sadness. Elijah snorts. “What?”
“Cady cussed their asses out,” Elijah responds. “She went off, even I was scared. They didn’t have a chance to get anything in edgewise.”
“That’s not- not safe,” Janis whispers anxiously. “Wh-why?”
“Shh, darling, I know it was a bad idea,” Cady says, blushing slightly at Elijah’s summation of the events. She just said whatever came to her. “But they hurt you. I’m not gonna let anyone get away with that. Nothing happened, and I won’t do that again.”
Janis looks warily to Damian, who gives her a sad nod. Cady gives a weak grin watching their apparent psychic connection.
“When I was-well. The first-the first time,” Janis begins shakily. “I was-was fourteen. Stupid. I-I made f-fun of them. And-and-and…”
She breaks down again, crying into Cady’s shoulder gently. Damian asks her if he can tell the story for her, and she nods.
“She kind of taunted them. I did too, it was funny for a while,” he says quietly. “But then one of them got really angry. He got them all to yell at us a lot louder, and Janis was obviously still kind of sensitive to the whole d-slur thing. Which they noticed, so they yelled that over and over. And then he threw a rock, and it hit her. She had a bruise for almost a month, it almost broke her arm.”
“Oh god, love,” Cady whispers in sad shock. “I’m so sorry.”
“That guy was arrested, but the rest of them weren’t. And he got out pretty quickly, unfortunately. His church paid his bail,” Damian growls. “We’ve tried to avoid them since.”
“Was he there?” Cady asks him quietly.
“No,” Damian says with a shake of his head. “But it was similar enough to what happened last time. She wasn’t right for a long time after it happened. And it makes sense she’s traumatized a little.”
Cady nods sadly and cuddles her girlfriend closer. It’s so hot, but Janis is crying so hard into her shoulder that she can’t think about anything else.
“Shh, darling, I’m so sorry,” Cady says quietly, rocking her girlfriend from side to side. “You’re safe, I’m safe. All of us are safe, nobody got hurt this time. Everything’s okay, I promise.”
Janis nods gently against her and tries to calm down, matching Cady’s slow, deep breathing as best she can and inhaling her comforting scent of rosewater, cherries, and books. They all mingle in an enchanting aroma around Cady, and Janis can’t get enough.
After another few minutes she stops crying again, and is just sniffling quietly in Cady’s hold.
“Okay?” Cady asks quietly. Janis nods gently again. “Good. Do you want to go fix your makeup or stay here a while longer?”
“You could do both,” Damian shrugs, pulling out a pack of makeup wipes and a few basic products. “What? You never know what you might need.”
“Gay,” Elijah teases. Damian pokes his tongue out at him.
Cady takes a few of the wipes and tenderly swipes the mascara and streaky remnants of a pride flag from Janis’ face. Her lipstick survived, so she leaves that. “Look up, dearest.”
Janis does, so she gently swipes on a new coat of eyeliner and several layers of mascara, as Janis likes it to be. “Thank you.” She says quietly, blinking a few times to get everything in place once Cady finishes.
“You’re welcome,” Cady responds with a kiss to her cheek. “Do you want to go home? You’ve been through it today.”
“No,” Janis replies instantly. “I-I went home last time. I let them get to me. I can’t do it again.”
“Okay,” Cady says. “If you’re sure you’re okay.”
Janis nods and stands up, brushing over her cheeks to try and help any remaining tear tracks fade. Cady, Damian, and Elijah stand as well.
“Oh, hang on a second,” Cady says hastily, taking her bag off again and rooting through it. She pulls out Janis’ pride flag and ties it gently around her neck so she has a cape like the rest of them. “It came off your face. You need another one.”
Janis grins weakly and squeezes her hand, leading them out of the alley and back to the festival.
“Hey,” Cady says quietly as they follow Damian and Elijah back closer to the entrance. Janis looks at her with a questioning hum, still not really in a mood to speak. Cady holds their intertwined hands up. “I love you.” She squeezes Janis’ hand three times, one squeeze for each word.
Janis smiles and leans in for a quick kiss. She looks around anxiously before she does, but the fact that she’s even willing to do so at all is frankly a miracle. “I love you too.” She squeezes Cady back four times, following the same pattern.
Eventually they get close to the area where they had painted the rocks earlier. And Cady gets an idea.
“Darling, will you be okay if I leave for a few minutes? I think I left something back that way,” she says to throw Janis off slightly. Janis pouts but nods and picks up a bit of speed to catch up with Damian. He screams and whirls around when she taps him on the shoulder, and Cady muffles laughter into her hand as she loops around a building and runs over to the booth.
“Oh, hello! Welcome back, are you here to do some more?” The kind lady asks.
“Um, yes, do you have any that are like that one?” Cady asks, pointing to one of the ones she decorated earlier. “And could I maybe keep this one?”
“I’m really not supposed to, but I don’t see why not. Our gardens aren’t that big,” the lady shrugs, handing over a rock of a similar size and shape.
“Thank you!” Cady calls, squeezing out all the colors she’ll need and running to hide from her little group. She copies the design she wants, and grins when it turns out even better this time. The paint dries within ten minutes, so she holds it carefully as she returns her supplies and takes her time returning to Janis.
Once it’s dry enough, she tucks it into her backpack and rejoins her friends and girlfriend.
She finds them by the cupcakes again. Damian seems very pleased with his lemon transgender pride flag one, Elijah got a cookies and cream demisexual one, and Janis seems content with another lesbian pride one since she gets this one all to herself.
“Hey, love,” Cady greets, once again leaning in and taking a small nibble of her cupcake. Janis whines in defeat, but turns to greet her with a smile.
“You’re a thief,” she gripes jokingly, kissing Cady’s cheek.
“A cute thief,” Cady responds.
“You got me there,” Janis chuckles. “Did you find your thing?”
“Yep! All good,” Cady says. “Now you have frosting on your nose.”
Janis scrunches her face up to see, making Cady giggle. She leans in to kiss it off, returning the favor Janis gave earlier.
“Jan, are you done?” Damian asks around the last mouthful of his cupcake. Janis takes the last bite of hers and nods, standing up to throw the wrappers in the nearby bin. Cady sneakily puts their backpack on Janis’ shoulders. She looks at her oddly, but puts her arms through to carry it around.
“Should we leave? I think we’ve done all there is to do,” Elijah says. “And I want ice cream.”
Janis perks up at the mention of ice cream. She’s lactose intolerant, but will be damned if it keeps her from enjoying her favorite cold treat.
“Janis, no,” Cady says. “You get sorbet.” Janis pouts, pulling her own puppy eyes pleadingly. Resist, Cady. “Fine, we’ll stop somewhere and get you your lactose pills.”
Janis thinks for a second before giving a begrudging nod. She’d rather not deal with a stomachache on top of everything else today, maybe her lactose pills are a good compromise.
“Good, come on,” Cady says. Janis shrieks in surprise as she picks her up piggyback style and starts following Damian and Elijah to the gates. “What?”
“When did you get so strong, babe?” Janis asks, clinging to her shoulders as Cady grips her thighs.
“You’re not that heavy, Jay,” Cady chuckles, adjusting her grip slightly. “And I did grow up in Africa. I carried a lot of water around.”
“Are you from Africa, baby, really? I had no idea,” Janis teases.
“I will drop you,” Cady threatens in retaliation. “If you don’t appreciate my services.”
“No, I appreciate them,” Janis says hastily, clinging to her tighter. She rests her chin on Cady’s shoulder and squishes their cheeks together. The rhythm of their steps nearly lulls her to sleep. “‘S nice.”
“Good,” Cady giggles. “You’re so cute.”
“No,” Janis whines, turning her head away to hide her blush. “That’s not how this is supposed to go.”
Cady laughs again. “Well, it’s how it’s going, so I suggest you learn to live with it. I think you’re absolutely adorable.”
“Why?” Janis pouts. “I spent so much time trying to make myself not cute.”
“Because you just are. Your eyes are so big, and you care so much about the people you can be bothered to give a shit about, and the way you stick your tongue out when you try to focus just… hurts me, almost,” Cady says, listing a few things. “And you love cuddles and when I hold you, and you still blush every time I call you Jellybean, and you pout when you get tired, and-“
“Okay, okay,” Janis says desperately, cutting her off so she can calm down. Her face is bright red by this point. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” Cady says, depositing her safely just outside the car. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Janis says, leaning in for a kiss.
“Oh my god, get in, losers!” Damian yells far too loudly. Janis and Cady both laugh and slide into the backseat.
————-
“You have an ice cream mustache,” Janis chuckles at her girlfriend once their tasty snack is finished. “Come here.”
Cady reaches for her, and Janis presses their lips together contently, the flavors of chocolate and strawberry mingling on their tongues.
“There,” Janis says once they finally pull back. Damian and Elijah went inside to browse the candy for sale, so she doesn’t have to worry about being scolded for kissing Cady so aggressively.
“Thanks,” Cady giggles. “Oh, I have something for you.”
“Huh?” Janis says confusedly as Cady takes the backpack back from her and starts rooting through it. Cady pulls out her rock and holds it behind her back.
“You have to promise not to laugh at it, I did my best,” Cady demands. Janis nods in confusion and holds her hands out for her gift. Her brows furrow for a split second when Cady drops the stone in them, but she smiles widely when she turns it over to see what it’s been decorated with.
“The rainbow lion,” she says happily, tracing a tender finger over a piece of his mane.
“I went back and made another one for you, the lady let me keep it,” Cady says. “Do you get it?”
“No, I didn’t know there was something to get,” Janis says. Cady sits next to her on the bench and smiles as Janis leans onto her shoulder.
“A group of lions is called a pride,” Cady says quietly. “And you’re in my pride. In more ways than one. I love you, so you’re in my group. And I’m so, so proud of you. For just… being you. And being here. And letting me love you.”
Janis pulls back, and Cady notices her eyes brimming with tears as she suddenly tackles Cady in a tight hug. Cady squeezes her back just as tightly.
“I love you so much,” Janis sniffles. “Thank you.”
“I love you too,” Cady says, stroking down Janis’ braid. “Oh, darling, don’t cry, I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s okay,” Janis chuckles through her tears. “Good cry this time.”
“Ah, okay,” Cady says, gently rubbing up and down Janis’ back as her girlfriend moves to sit on her lap. The sun is finishing its journey for the day, the stars are just barely visible and the horizon is still bathed in varying shades of pink and orange and purple. “Happy Pride, darling.”
“Happy Pride, Peanut.”
I’m glad I’m in yours.
-
well i’ve had quite a bit of excitement trying to get this posted, so i hope you enjoyed!
requests are still paused, but i am hoping to get them re-opened in the next few weeks. nearly there.
thanks for reading!
lots of love,
ezzy
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ZOOted | group chatzy
TIMING: Midday, August 29, 2021. LOCATION: The Main Street of Downtown. SUMMARY: What’s black and white and silent all over? The creatures at the zoo make their grand escape. TRIGGERS: Brief vomit (marked in chatzy), animal death.
Anara Kingston was just getting ready to open up her family bistro for the day, hands propped on her hips as she admired the storefront that multiple generations had made thrive on the corner of Main Street in Downtown White Crest. There was your usual display of signage, an eye-catching banner that advertised a meatball sandwich special, and a small paper in the lower left corner of the front window that proudly read ‘127 days since last accident’. The notice was actually one of the larger draws of the establishment in a town such as White Crest, where oddities and danger seemed to lurk around every dark corner. People wanted to feel safe while they ate, munching on overpriced meals while they tarried the day away. Anara leaned forward to polish the glass in front of the advertisement of their sanctity, only to stiffen when she heard a foreign braying of...was that a donkey? No. She’d been around enough of the farms that peppered White Crest to know it wasn’t the sound of such a creature. 
A clopping of hooves was quick to follow the strange barking, and to the shop owner’s amazement, none other than a genuine zebra had begun to parade down Main Street, children and adults laughing and pointing alike as the escaped creature began to graze on the flowerbeds of a plant shop. 
Nell stared for a solid minute at the zebra that had waltzed down Main Street as if he owned the place, already trying to figure out whether this was some bullshit she was willing to deal with today, or if she should simply call Kaden at Animal Control and make this his problem. Unfortunately her decision was made for her as a swarm of pixies, seemingly also escaped from the zoo, buzzed after the zebra to tug at anything they could get their grimy little hands around. With a deep sigh, Nell made her way over to the swarm that was doing their best to scalp a woman by yanking at her hair. This was now officially a problem she needed to solve.
Sai huffed as he ran down the sidewalk after a black horned Scapegoat that had gleefully decided to aid some oddly silent goats on their break towards glorious freedom. “No Ibulba! They live in the zoo!”
Keys rattled as Metzli strode towards their gallery, deciding to walk through Main Street. Yuca was leashed and in tow, picking up her pace in excitement. She always loved walking about the gallery. All the pets and enrichment she could ask for, making for a very happy cat. That was until, a swarm of sprites zoomed past the two and made the vampire stumble and trip, dropping their umbrella. Yuca mewled terribly, angry and shocked by the sudden interruption. 
Metzli barely had enough time to react as they saw the swarm circling back around. Eyes widened and they reached for a door, any door to  swiftly let Yuca inside, but it was no use. The sun made their skin sting and bones ache, but getting their cat to safety was the top priority. Leaping into an alleyway, only a few of the sprites managed to find them and picked and prodded at their skin. “What the fuck!” They yelled, hoping they could catch someone’s attention as they wrapped their arms around Yuca. 
It had been drizzling on and off all day, leaving the pavement tiles slightly slicker than Chloe liked as she navigated her trolley along the road. Her mind was fractured in several place - thinking about the strange flower order she’d processed for a funeral this morning that for some reason wanted tree roots in the bouquet as well as flowers, about the grocery shop she’d just finished, and the painting of Lydia’s face that stuck with her. She didn’t notice the rumbling of animals at first, until something pig-sized, black, and white cantered past her. Chloe screamed, jumping back as she waved her umbrella at the mime-like creature, her eyes wide. After a second, her hand clutching her chest, Chloe realised it wasn’t another evil type of mime, but just a… an anteater? No, what were they called… The ones with the longer noses that looked a little like pie-bald pigs…. The word would come to her in a moment, but it didn’t look too threatening. 
Unfortunately, most things in White Crest didn’t. 
Bly had spent the morning in a coffee shop with Nas and overall it had been a really freaking good time. Nas had to meet up with his girlfriend so he had left them alone in the shop until they had finished their coffee. Leaving with the shop, overpacked backpack slung over their shoulder, they stopped short. Was there like a fair and they had missed the advertisements? It didn’t really seem like a fair, but White Crest was weird like that. “So, uh, is this like an event? I didn’t buy a ticket so I’m not sure if I’m allowed to be here?” They looked over to a person nearby, hands splayed out in front of them. “I don’t have cash on me either, so I can’t even buy a ticket!”
White Crest’s one and only white Bengal tiger prowled around, looking at all of the strange and new sights that one never gets to see from behind a cage. However, she only had one thing on her mind. Where, oh where, was that zebra?
Alcher didn’t often go into town, but something had piqued her interest today. She could smell the animals crowding the streets, free from their cells at the local zoo. It was something she knew would be fun to watch, if not join in on. Unfortunately, being a wolf in this commotion might end up with her being chased by the humans who thought animals belonged in cages as well, so it was in her human guise that she showed up downtown, arms folded as she watched. Someone spoke up nearby, and Alcher shrugged. An event, not that would be funny. A smile curled her lips. “I can not say, but I can say I am enjoying this, are you?”
Nell didn’t necessarily want to kill the sprites. After all, as far as murderous pint-sized things went, they were decently harmless for the most part. And perhaps she could relate with being so angry at a world while being so little. Not that she’d ever admit that. So instead of burning them to bits with some form of iron, she looked around for any sort of box, container, something to hold the creature within. Seeing the person struggling with their umbrella nearby she yelled out to them. “You got a box or something? A bag? Anything?”
Morgan couldn’t remember how she’d convinced herself that taking Sundew along her usual weekend walk/leisurely shopping trip would be relaxing. On their way, the smug pixie delighted in reading every sign, front page, and logo they passed. When Morgan said Sundew didn’t have to, she knew how smart she was, she seriously didn’t have to, the pixie only cackled and circled higher to see more things, and then spoke of her ambition to market something to humans as ‘natural and organic’ and fill it with cat droppings. And this was before Morgan went from giving Bex a look of apology one next and starting a zebra eyeball-to-eyeball the next.
If Morgan had ever learned anything useful about zebras, it vanished in that moment. All she could process were its stripes, its beady, wicked little black eyes, and the tension freezing her cold muscles. 
“That's a dummy looking horsey,” Sundew giggled. “It’s hair is almost as funny looking as yours!”
Morgan ached to take the pixie and squeeze her quiet, but it dawned on her, just in time, that there were a lot of people she recognized just beyond her (at least one she never wanted to see) and stare-down with a zebra was going to be the least of her concerns. 
“Sai!” Morgan called. “You’re proficient in animal handling, right??”
Things in White Crest had been pretty mild, all things considered, which to experts like Leah meant that mischief was right around the corner.  She had been thinking it all morning, and the thoughts continued to plague her as she sat for a quick lunch in the park.  No sooner had the thought crossed her mind again than she heard a rumbling close by- literally around the corner.  She stood up suddenly, confusion lacing her features, and walked toward Main street where she saw the contents of the zoo quite literally spilling out into town.  A couple of lemurs hung from a tree nearby and suddenly, a dalmatian soared past her, running in the direction of a pet supply shop.  Did the zoo hold dalmations now, too?
“Uhhh, I mean, I am trying to enjoy it but, like, there’s a tiger here now.” Bly said etched the animal began to look around looking like it was trying to find prey. “I’m pretty sure it would probably try to eat me if it had a chance. I don’t want to be eaten today?” There was a lemur somewhere nearby, Bly could hear it and they were starting to think this wasn’t an event. “Do you think we should like call the government or something?”
Sai ran up to one of the zoo employees that’d been rather nonchalantly pursuing the escaping animals, recognizing their striped uniform and panda hat. “I’m sorry… sir did you ..” he panted hands on his knees. “See which …way…the …goats..went?” 
The Quiet Panda Fan regarded Sai expressionlessly for a time. Eyes with strange white pupils and black irises, contacts no doubt, seemed to bore into some deep place inside of the wizard. The Panda Fan turned and walked into an alley out of sight. 
“Oh thanks!” Sai followed after, thinking Ibulba and the goat exodus had run into a dead end. He walked into the alley only to watch the Panda fan be torn apart by some unseen force, sinews, sin, and fuzzy panda kitsch unraveling into a haze of hair-thin black and white strands. The pale and dark flesh-ribbons swirled around Sai like a school of curious Koi fish before slithering onto the walls of the alley. Black and white murals of zebras, penguins, pandas danced beneath a picture of a black sun with white rays all over the alley walls. Above it all were the words “BENEATH THE LOATHSOME NOISE OF LIFE, BLESSED SILENCE WAITS.”
Sai swallowed as he stared, but thankfully Morgan's voice called out from somewhere on the street. “Uh…uh, yes! Yes I can help,” the wizard shouted, running aware from the black and white murals now adorning the alley bricks.
Forming into a ball to protect Yuca and their face, Metzli heard Nell call out her question. They answered in a frustrated huff, “Does it look like a have a fucking box?!” Swatting away with an arm they growled and hit several of the few sprites picking at them, even managing to grab one and bite its head off without a second thought. 
Somewhere, in the distance, screaming could be heard. A waddle of penguins had just stolen a man’s coffee.
“I think it’s cute,” Bex had said when Morgan insisted Sundew didn’t need to read every sign possible as they strolled downtown. She was like a toddler, learning to read for the first time, and eager to show off and prove to people how smart they were. Bex gave Sundew a smile, and a quiet wink when Morgan stopped and Bex nearly ran into her. In the street, a zebra trotted by, and for a moment, Bex wasn’t sure she was seeing things right. She rubbed her eyes, looked between the animal and Morgan, snapping to and realizing it was, in fact, real, when she called out to Sai. What was he doing here? Why was there a zebra downtown? But as she looked around, she noticed more animals roaming the streets and took off in a trot after Morgan. “What’s going on-- what is that?” Wide curious eyes, not sure if she was supposed to panic or be of help somehow.
The anteater? Pig? shaped animal slowed to a trot in front of Chloe, then snuffled at a nearby plant pot full of purple gardenias, its long nose prodding and poking at the flowers. Skeptically, Chloe bristled the umbrella at it, not trusting that anything this innocuous looking could truly be innocuous. Someone yelled at her and she tore away her eyes from the creature for a second to look at the young woman. “Uh!” She yelled back, looking at her trolley full of groceries, before remembering that she’d packed some extra reusable cotton bags in case she bought more. Turning her gaze back to the animal that was now happily monching on the flowers, she pulled out the reusable bags. “Will these do? What is going on??”
Alcher regarded the tiger that was pointed out with a placid expression. “She is beautiful, isn’t she?” The child was complaining, and they smelled so human, it made Alcher’s nose crinkle through the scents of animals free from their prisons. “You do not know that. Not all animals are vicious and want to eat everything.” A shrug, and she was strolling away from them and into the street. “What good can men in suits do? I say enjoy the show, kinder, perhaps it is a free one.” 
Nell growled in frustration as the first person proved useless, though she supposed they were busy protecting their cat. Fine. As always, she’d have to do it herself. But then another woman procured a plastic bag, and there was hope for the people of the world and their abilities to respond to a crisis once again. “It’s gonna have to do!” Nell said while reaching out for the bags, already thinking of a spell she could use to make them stronger, harder to be torn apart by little sprite hands. “Looks like a jail break,” Nell replied dryly, recognizing some of the animals from the zoo.
The tiger could smell her prey in the distance. It was near a group of the two legged creatures, those humans who locked her in behind those bars and watched her. Now, she watched them. Now, they would not separate her from her meal. She moved forward with the confidence of a prisoner released from her cage after too long. Like a prisoner, she wanted a good meal, and she wanted it fresh. One of the humans, a strange smelling one, one that did not seem human at all, regarded her, and so the tiger returned the look only for a moment. She was so hungry. She would eat.
The sprites became preoccupied by Nell’s trapping attempt, giving Metzli enough time to get up and run off with Yuca in their arms. That’s when they saw the rest of the animals roaming about the street. Zebras, tigers, and several others. Supernatural others. “Whoa…” They said, amazed and confused. “What is happ—” They were interrupted by running into someone, and that someone was Morgan. 
“My familiar is criminal,” declared Sai mournfully as he reached Morgan, Bex, and another clumsy person,  face flushed from a long sprint down several streets.
“I guess?” Bly had to admit it did make sense that animals didn’t always want to eat people. Still… They didn’t want to test it. “They might get hurt if we don’t help them though! A tiger or a zebra isn’t going to do well in Maine. It’s cold here.” Then the tiger was looking at them and Bly was pretty thankful they didn’t pee themself. They slowly inched behind the intense lady, “I don’t like this. Making eye contact with a tiger is a bad idea!”
Sundew had never dreamed of a more perfect day. The humans looked so silly with their faces like that and one of them made the funniest sound when a fluffy cloud of sprites swarmed and picked at her nisty-nasty hair. 
Sundew flew out of her hiding spot on Morgan’s shoulder and conjured a mallet just her size between her fingers. She bonked the human running toward them to help, then she flew toward the sprites, cackling, “Yes! Yes! Cage-free chaos!” Then she flew to the nearest human and bit their hand and left the image of a lion paw on their wrist instead. “Woopsie! Better get that checked out! I hope your premiums are good!”
Morgan looked from Sundew, to Sai, to Bex, to the zebra, and back again. There were people losing their coffee, people losing their sanity, Nell and Chloe maybe doing something clever with a plastic bag, and it was all too much. 
“What do you mean criminal?” She cried. “Did Ibulba do this?” Normally this would’ve been outrageous but nothing was outrageous today. The zebra bared his teeth and Morgan jumped back and ran into someone else. 
“Oh, hi. Nice day for a walk, huh? You really might wanna consider going anywhere else right now.” Then she saw Sundew fluttering back their way with a familiar, dangerous look on her face. “Or better yet, get down! This really isn’t safe for anyone!”
Chloe eyed the animal chewing on the plants, itching around it carefully. When she looked up at Nell again, she frowned, finally realising that the ungulate creature wasn’t the only thing running around. All of the animals were black and white, and despite the havoc they were creating, they were much quieter than a normal stampede. “Are you going to use a bag to try and stop-” Chloe gestured at the skunks, snakes and single cow, as well as the terrifying creature beside them. Its nose was too long and flexible. She didn’t trust it.
Bex glanced between Sai and Morgan. Sai seemed breathless and Morgan seemed panicked and Sundew was off making trouble with some small, butterfly-looking creatures that seemed to like her. As far as animal handling went, Bex had rolled low, she’d never been around animals in her life, but that didn’t mean she didn’t know anything about them. The zebra brayed at them and she scooted behind Morgan as well, when someone bumped into them. A familiar someone. 
“Metzli??” she breathed, raising a brow. Why were they here? It was still daytime! “Oh, watchout!” She called, tugging on their arm as Sundew whizzed toward them, ready to spread more antics. “Sundew, no, please!” she tried. The pixie rarely listened to Bex, even though she often let them braid her hair in the garden and laugh about silly pixie things.
Nell shook her head while she mumbled a quick spell under her breath, and the cotton bag stiffened into something much harder. “What?” she asked with vague annoyance on her features while she tried to figure out how to herd the sprites into the bag. “You want me to use the bag on the tapir?” That was the long-nosed thing standing next to Chloe, right? She remembered seeing them in the jungles of South America. “If you wanna keep it as a pet you’re gonna have to use something else. Maybe think of a name for it first. But no- this is for them!” she replied, gesturing towards the swarm of pixies.
“Maybe? I don’t know? She is aiding and abetting it at least, and her unluck is very powerful ,” Sai confessed glumly, as if somehow convinced his magic goat would be put on trial for zoo escapes.
It was too late, Metzli was knocked to the ground and Yuca yelled out in terror. She almost ran off, but they managed to grab her leash and pull her back in as they got to their feet. They were too frantic between the chaos and trying to get into some shade. “Oh. Hi Bex!” They said in a daze and ran under a nearby canopy for protection with Yuca in their arms once again. Her hackles were raised and she was growling. 
Leah watched from across the street as a panda bear chewed on pages from a book, and that was the last straw.  Chaos and carnage she could let go, but book destruction?  Unacceptable.  She stomped across the street toward the bear, taking a deep breath to settle herself as she went.
The tiger and her gorgeous coat stopped to regard Alcher for a moment, and what a sight she was. Alcher simply stood and admired her back, giving a nod. She didn’t need help stalking her prey, but the proud zebra had strutted further down the street and seemed to be oblivious to the chaos it had caused, if maybe proud. Alcher could relate. She would want to kill it, too. Perhaps it would taste sweet, like the smell of fae hanging in the air. Fae blood was a treasure for someone like Alcher, though she did not indulge often-- fae held grudges, fae remembered, fae had magic she didn’t want to mess with. Alcher turned to beckon to the child, whose worry was palpable. “I think they’ll do just fine. Keep up, if you don’t want to be the next meal.”
The lemurs began jumping on people, using their little hands to flip people off. They’d learned things during school field trips.
Sundew would later tell her troop that she’d made fifty humans think they were turning into animals even if it was only more like ten. 
“Can’t catch me!” She giggled, whizzing by Bex. She pulled on the girl’s hair as hard as she could, humans were so silly when they weeble-wobbled, and did several circles in the air to show how much she was enjoying herself. She circled around to where the sprites were clustering and touched her toes to the tops of their heads as she crowed, “Fly my pretties, fly!” Just to get them good and riled up. 
The zebra in front of Morgan pulled its ears back and huffed silently, then, swift as chaos, it reared and lunged at Morgan, knocking her down as it pranced toward freedom. Morgan wheezed, wincing as her chest bent back into the right shape, and looked ahead into the thick cluster of goats and animals. “What I’m hearing, Sai, is that this is only gonna get worse until we find your goat. And so we gotta—“ she gestured vaguely at the mess brewing in front of them. “Find her?”
A tall jogger sighed and scooped up a grizzly bear cub that’d been making excited friendly noises at the bibio-voric panda bear and had begun to imitate to see if human literature was indeed delicious. “No Zeke,” Roy sighed, chiding his youngest sibling. “We can’t play with cousin right now.”
Bly’s mouth was dry, this lady just nodded at the tiger. The tiger who was hunting was nodded at by a Lady who didn’t seem to care. Their fingers drummed a rhythm against their sternum, drowning out the pounding underneath it. “You think it might be hungry after a different meal?” Their voice was reaching a scared squeaking pitch. “Should I call my mom?”
“No! I thought you wanted to use the bag on the tapir! It looks shifty!” Chloe yelled back, eyeing it suspiciously again. “I don’t want it as a pet!” All bickering about the tapir faded away as she saw the sprites twisting around in the air. Chloe froze, shrinking in on herself as she clutched her iron necklace her breath racing. “I- I can’t- I can’t I can’t-” She handed Nell an iron necklace with a long iron chain on it, fingers trembling as she pressed her back against the wall. Please don’t notice me, please don’t notice me, she thought as loud as she could.
Bex recoiled. “See if I ever share my gummies with you again!” she growled at the pixie as she incited a rebellion among the butterfly beings. Her eyes roamed again until she found Metzli under a canopy, cradling their cat. “Maybe you should get out of here? Your cat seems angry and scared and I think it’s just gonna get um--” she glanced back at Morgan, the zebra, wincing at the hit, refraining from calling out to her-- “worse.” She waved her hands a moment. “At least stay here! I’ll be back.” She backed away, then, and made her way over to Sai. “Which way did she go? Can you, like, track her?” She tried to think of a way for herself to be useful, but barring becoming a distraction, she couldn’t think of much. “Maybe we should split up?”
The tiger was close enough, now, her prey nearly in her mouth it was so close. She looked to the human that did not smell like a human, to the cub human next to her. They were not important. One did not smell like prey, and the other was too small to worry with. The tiger had her prey. She looked back at it and let out a silent snarl. Sound had not come out of her, not anymore. Not since she had been locked behind those bars, since the colors in her fur dripped from her like rain water. She lunged, teeth and claws sinking into the hind end of her prey. It, too, could not properly cry out. The tiger finally had her meal.
“She probably wants to take the petting zoo goats to the farm,” Sai said, watching with wide eyes as Morgan went from definitely dead to bodily wholeness in the span of seconds. “Which…would mean I’d be harboring stolen property aw shit noooooo!”
Bea heard the yells before she saw anything out of the ordinary. All she had wanted was to buy a bottle of wine and have a bubble bath tonight. Sighing, the witch cracked open a bottle, screw top, Thank God, and took a sip. She saw her sister doing something and determined it was likely best to go help her. “Hey, Nellie,” She said casually as she offered the bottle to her sister. “Who let the animals out of the zoo?”
The tiger took its prey and Alcher grinned. The young human was panicking and she rolled her eyes. “What good would that do? If you want to survive, you must think smarter.” She didn’t know why she was even bothering with this human child, but she didn’t know how to walk away anymore. She’d grown...soft. Shuddering, Alcher turned away. She could smell them on the air, her cousins. They were traveling together and were getting closer. She had been waiting for this. It was time to make a new home for them. “Come,” she ushered to the child, “I want to show you something.” 
Nell shot the other woman an incredulous look, sparing the black and white tapir once more glance before calling back to her in exasperation. “It’s a vegetarian!” The witch couldn’t remember the fancy name for ‘plant-eater’ right now. She wasn’t sure what to make of the blond’s alarm, but it only took Nell a moment to recognize the iron that had been deposited into her hand. She still didn’t want to kill the things...but maybe she could use this to herd them. It covered more ground than her knife, anyway. Swinging the chain above her head in a wide circle, Nell moved towards the sprites with her bag in the other hand. “Get!” she yelled out of instinct, as if she were wrangling some particularly rowdy cattle. “Into the bag and I won’t singe your wings off!” Bea? What the hell? Where had Bea come from? “I don’t know who let them out. Would you care to help get them back in?”
Miriam had decided to go for a walk, her skin mostly covered as she wore a large sun hat and glasses, looking for a meal before she headed back home. She was drawn to an intense amount of misery and pain, despair coming from a particular area of town. She was curious, this much concentrated agony unusual. “That little fucker waddled away with my cappuccino!” was all Miriam heard as she stumbled upon, well, a herd. All sorts of wildlife ran amok, and she blinked against the sight of it. She should turn around. She was going to turn around. This was just a little much for even her.
Mom always said not to lose your head. She also always said that letting strangers show you things would often end up poorly. Bly had already lost their head, might as well let a stranger show them something. Plus, she wasn’t scared and it was a good idea to be with someone who wasn’t losing their shit. “Uh, yeah sure? Is it another tiger cus I’m not sure if I can deal with that. Especially after witnessing that…” They trailed off looking at the tiger feasting, it made their stomach turn.
Of course Yuca was upset, her predators were roaming about and Metzli could do close to nothing to help as long as the sun was around. People were running and screaming as they glared quietly. They opted to simply threaten, baring their teeth in a predatory show of dominance under the safety of the shadows, petting Yuca and cooing at her every so often. They needed just a little more time before they were able to bolt back home. 
The wine was ignored and Bea let out a little huff through her nose. She wouldn’t offer next time then. Screwing the top back on, she placed the bottle back into her tote bag gingerly. It was a pretty nice wine. “Direct me, Nell. I don’t exactly have experience in this.” If Nell wasn’t here, deep in the fray like she always was, Bea might have considered leaving, but her sister was and so Bea couldn’t leave. “What are you going to do with the bag after you get them?”
The  sprites were only too happy to listen to Sundew. With a cascade of hissing and fluttering they rose, spread and circled the room. When the iron started flying into their cluster, their humming grew louder. Yes, it was going to be a cutting kind of day after all. 
Morgan nodded along to Sai’s words. “Mkay. No one is harboring stolen animals. Petting zoo. We got this. We totally got this.” She stood slowly and staggered forward. But maybe, uh—” Morgan didn’t want to broadcast that she couldn’t remember what Ibulba looked like under these circumstances, but just then, every fluffy goat in the distance looked the same. “A description so we can all be equally aware and prepared would help!” She nodded encouragingly, then stuck her hand into her bag and took out a snack to eat on her way to the goats. 
Alcher walked through the animals as they gave her a wide berth, especially those one might consider prey. Even in this form, they could sense what she was and she moved like a fish through water, smooth and gliding, the child in tow. Good, they’d decided to follow. She made her way down the alley and towards the edge of the streets, where it met fields of grass and eventually grew into trees. She looked back at the child. “Not a tiger, no,” she pointed at the pack of only black and white wolves, stalking the edge of the forest. They, too, had found prey, and Alcher was eager to watch. “Watch how nature truly works. This is what the world makes of those who are weak.” Of those who are prey, like little human children. 
“Everything here is weirdly quiet and mime shaped so the tapir probably eats hearts on the DL!” Chloe yelled back. When she noticed the sprites, her body trembled, remembering the time she’d seen them swarm and slaughter a nearby bird. The other thing she’d learned was that wherever there were sprites, there were pixies lording over them like a bite sized monarch. She shied further back into the street, terrified to get any closer, when suddenly the sprites grew more and more energetic, spreading out and urging into a frenzy. One zipped inches from Chloe’s face as she choked on the kind of scream banned by fae promise, unable to  do so much as swat them away. “Maybe- maybe- maybe something sweet!” Fae were renowned for their sweet tooths, she knew.
Sai shoved a hand in his pocket and grabbed a handful of Parmesan cheese from the baggie in there. He covertly held the Parmesan flat on his hand while moving closer to Morgan to screen the cheese from view. The Tyromancer murmured a few phrases under his breath and the cheese grains shaped themselves into a moving perfect replica of the black horned Scapegoat. “That's her”
Bro, Mom was one hundred percent right. This was a bad idea. A messed up teaching moment. The dizziness wasn’t fading as Bly looked over the scene that this woman had lead them too. “I really, really prefer when I see nature working through a documentary.” Why had they had coffee today? That always made their anxiety spike and their anxiety was already spoke. “I mean this is metal as fuck, like maybe you should write for horror movies, but I’m not a prey animal? I’m not going to be in situations like this very often and a pack of wolves isn’t going to eat me. I’m not weak. Or like I’m not usually weak?”
Bex watched in awe as Sai shaped the cheese, a bit gleeful at the creation of it. She wondered if one day she could do something like that. Maybe not with cheese. Definitely not with cheese. She glanced up and squinted down the street towards where Morgan was headed, the heard of goats far enough away to look like a stripe of cotton on the horizon. “Okay,” she nodded and started off across the street, looking both ways and letting a heard of quick moving raccoons scuttle down the road towards the alleys before turning to head up the sidewalk. She spotted Nell and Bea and another woman dealing with the sprites and decided it was probably better to not disturb them, pulling her own magic to the edge of her fingertips in case she’d need it. “Ibulba!” she called out as she got closer, “I’ve got um-- apples for you!” Goats liked apples, right?
Nell patience was worn thin. She already had so little of it to begin with, especially these days in the wake of everything that had happened over the past few months. Without warning she whipped the iron chain hard and fast enough to slice clean through a swath of the sprites, killing them instantly as their burned halves fell to the ground. “Get in the bag while you still can.” Again it had come to violence. Was this what she was supposed to be doing? Killing sprites and helping people? But the sprites weren’t being helped. The reason she couldn’t be worthy in the way Dave had said— was it because she’d never been able to solve things without adding more violence? Trying to shake her head of the thoughts she spoke again to Bea. “I’m gonna put them in the bag and glue them to the fucking ground. Then I’ll deal with them after.” Bea wanted direction. The biggest threat was the tiger, though she seemed happy now that she’d gotten her meal. “Just herd the animals back towards the zoo. Starting with this guy-” Nell nodded in the tapir’s direction. “A shadow leash or something.” The blond’s continued fear drew Nell’s attention, and she didn’t hesitate to dissect the sprite into two, the necklace swinging inches from the woman’s face. 
Alcher frowned and turned to look back at the child, golden eyes reflecting sunlight in a way human ones could not. “Oh, but you are, child,” was all she said, before she moved forward swiftly and finally ripped free of her human flesh. She wanted to join the pack, the ache of needing one too hard to resist. 
There was finally a chance, a chance to run in the midst of the chaos. Everyone was doing their best to do a multitude of things. Stop the chaos, run from the chaos, and even ensuing more chaos. Normally, Metzli would be excited by their own dangerous plans, but they would never dare risk Yuca’s life like that. And so they ran as fast as they could, inconspicuously. Running past Bex, they pulled her to the side as an ostrich that was running next to them nearly trampled her. “Watch your back!” They yelled as they continued to run, and get the fuck away from the fun. It was fun they were willing to miss out on. “This doesn’t mean I like you though!” Their voice trailed off into the distance as they finally escaped with Yuca. Passing by Bly and taking the chance for a little chaos. “Watch out. There’s a leopard behind you…!” Even yelling “Made you look!” As they continued. 
Ibulba was watching approvingly as the quiet petting zoo goats tore through an upscale clothing store. Stalls and hangers toppled inside the store, the destruction escalating in unlikely domino effects as some unseen force seemed to play havoc with probability. Ibulba and several other goats were munching on a delicious Marie-Chantal Miller wedding dress they’d pulled out from the shattered viewing window. But her ears perked up at her name. 
Ibulba turned to face the familiar she-human who was holding an apple to her. Ibubla turned back to look, and saw the sacking of the silky human-covering place was well in hand. She trotted over to Bex, seeming at home in the surrounding anarchy, and took a prospective bite of the apple.
Bex stumbled when Metzli whizzed by her, yanking her out of the path of a storming ostrich. Scrunching her nose, she shouted back, “Yes you do!” before she reached her destination and found the clothing store in utter disarray. Well...most of the dresses were tacky, anyway. She wondered if expensive clothing tasted better than bargain bin. But Ibulba was happily trotting over to her and she held out the apple she’d had in her bag and reached out to pat her head. “Hey there,” she said casually, smiling at her. “Sai’s kinda worried about you, ya know. Can you go back to him? I think he really needs your help.” From what Bex had seen of her, and knew of her, she was fiercely protective of her spellcaster. It was the bond between familiar and caster Nell had told Bex about, and she couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. “Besides, looks like your friends’ve got everything under control here.” 
Shadow leash. Bea could handle that, and she could start gathering a decent amount of animals with her as she went with them. “Alright. I’ll be back when I can okay.” It was good to see Nell take charge. There was energy in her voice, a commanding tone that had been missing. “You’re doing a good job,” She said offhandedly as she subtly made a shadow leash for the tapir. The animal moved uncomfortably as it realized what she had done but she was already walking along, forcing him to follow.
VOMIT TW BEGIN
This was it, this lady was a serial killer and Bly was about to be a victim. Then her skin… changed and there was a wolf in her place and finally that bile that had been working it’s way up erupted, Bly choking on it as they let out a surprised wail. As they spit it up into the grass, someone screamed about a leopard and it took all Bly’s strength to sprint away as fast as they could. They were pretty sure they had screamed, but they were running to fast to know what left them as they reentered the chaos. 
VOMIT TW END
Morgan had just enough calm to take note of the image without choking on her fried brains. “Beautiful,” she deadpanned, and shambled with Bex toward that goat.
Sundew flew somersaults into the air, faster and faster, speeding toward the ground. A big black and white furry creature sneezed and swatted at her and sent her veering off course, into Morgan’s head. 
Morgan caught the pixie in the palm of her hand. She had a few irritated words lined up and ready to go when a hundred little cuts pinged on her head and back. The sprites, scattering from the threat of iron, had landed on her, and had decided to take out their aggression on her body. Morgan lurched away from Bex and Ibulba and fell on her knees.
“What was that for?” Sundew asked. She had fully expected to meet the eternal pixie night after that swipe, but the dummy boob had caught her on purpose and for absolutely no trade at all. 
Morgan was a little occupied with being bitten by angry sprites. She gave Sundew a dirty glare, so clear even the pixie knew what had to be done. She gave a whistle and ordered the sprites to go home. “There, are you happy now, Dummy Boob?” She asked. 
Morgan looked around, dazed and bleary eyed. “You know…maybe yeah,” she said dryly. “Come on. I’ve got a real live bad luck goat for you to meet. And a big ol farm she needs to go home to.”
From an alley, a friend was watching. It was not seen. It was not heard. But it was watching. Perhaps it, too, would one day find a companion to romp through the streets and eat with.
While the sprites rammed into Morgan, Nell saw red. With another uttering of her magic, and a tug on the bond that linked her and the witch’s familiar, Taki was blipping into existence at her side, as easily summoned as breathing air after nearly a decade of doing it. “Roast them,” she told Taki, waiting for the fiery inferno of his breath to make barbecue out of the bothersome pint-sized fae. “Morgan, duck!” A swath of flames erupted from the Ovinikk’s mouth before Nell could realize the sprites were retreating on the orders of Sundew— and the stragglers of the pack screeched as they were set ablaze. 
Ibulba closed her amber eyes and concentrated for a moment. She could feel her partner’s mounting anxiety from here. When Ibubla was still a kid,  she’d been presented with a young he-human. He suffered from convulsions and visions, but Ibulba has souldbounded with him nevertheless, discerning that his gentleness and diligence would provide balance to her chaos. Ibulba reached through the bond and found her human partner. 
Ibulba opened her eyes, munching pensively on the apple while nodding for Bex to follow. Several petting zoo goats looked up questioningly, but Ibulba knew she’d done what she could. They must find their own freedom and delicious silky snacks now. She had a hyperventilating partner to attend to. 
Ibulba wove her way unerringly through the stampedes, seeming to navigate through some superior sense of probability. She occasionally checked to see if Bex was following. Eventually she sprinted straight into her caster’s embrace, allowing him to bury his face and mumble inane worried things into her wooly fur.
Relieved, Bex followed Ibulba back to Sai, who grabbed her and hugged her so gratefully, it was as if they’d been parted for years. Or, perhaps, that their distance had pained him. She heard Nell’s familiar voice, too, and looked up from Sai and Ibulba, watching as Taki opened his mouth and let out a roar of flames. Something heavy fell in Bex’s stomach as she heard the anguished cries of the small butterfly critters. Winced and looked away, deciding that keeping her focus on Sai and Ibulba was the best idea. “C’mon, we should maybe get her back to the farm,” she ushered, looking back over her shoulder at Nell and wondering if she noticed her, too. She looked angry. Bex wished she could reach out with her own magic and help calm her down, but that wasn’t within her grasp yet. She patted Ibulba’s head again and smiled at Sai as best she could. “Maybe invest in a leash, too,” she teased.
There was little left of the tiger’s prey as her stomach became overly full. Still, it was so good, so fresh. She would not waste it. And, as the humans’ sounds grew louder, she would not be caught again. No more cages. No more bars. Only fresh, warm prey. She grabbed what was left by its leg and began dragging it off, away from the noise. She would finish it later, after some peace and quiet and freedom.
“T-t-the tiger,” one of the zoo keepers, scrawny and trembling and a voice that was beginning to fail every few words, managed to say. They were a new hire. They’d find their words eventually. Or perhaps lose them. They pointed in the direction of where the tiger had gone, but it was too late to go after her with all the other chaos on the loose. They would have to follow the blood smears and hope it led them to her. After all, how hard would it be to locate a white tiger?
It was all gloved hands on deck as the rest of the zoo keepers, along with some of White Crest’s finest joined together with tranquilizers and began systematically and, for the most part, silently dispatching animals to get them sent back to the zoo. It would be hard work, but it would be done.
While the tiger wandered off, Anara Kingston took inventory of the wreckage that had been done to the front of her bistro, the lemurs that were still flipping the bird to anyone who so much as glanced in their direction, and the actual birds that were fluttering around with teeth that looked a little too human. Hold on. Birds didn’t have teeth, did they? It didn’t matter anymore. With a resigned sigh she turned back towards the sign she’d been so proud to display, sullenly erasing the number on it, changing it to read ‘0 days since last accident.’
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