#i feel nauseous bc this isn’t even the first time

[lewishcmilton]

stan culture has fostered such an incredibly greedy and competitive atmosphere where you’re so desperate for any attention online that you lose any and all basic empathy you might’ve possessed at some point

[yourpsicodelicbitch]

Astro Observations 🧚‍♀️

Pinterest

The majority (for not saying everyone) of aries risings I know work as a company owner, CEO or is the assistant of the manager and they’re being prepared to replace the CEO in the future. and if they’re not, they’re so passionate about their goals -what can i say? cardinal + fire sign + THAT THE RISING IS IN ARIES..-.

Pluto dominant people HOW does it feel every time someone enters the room you’re suspicious about their intentions. Thinking that they’re some kind of thief, spy 🤪 that in the future will attack you and your loved ones?

Chiron in Pisces keep in mind not everything is directed towards you, don’t take it personally. If you’re going through a situation that coincides with what the other was talking about, it doesn’t mean it’s necessarily about you. Bb you’re SENSITIVE and that’s OKAY. For this, take a brake and try to separate your emotional perspective, observe yourself from a third plane. you’ll see how you’re acting and how the other acted. Don’t let that burning heart of yours affect the situation around you and with yourself.

Saturn 6H GIVE YOURSELF A BRAKE. you’re so lazy -depends on the other placements sorry for generalize- and at the same time you are the best worker. You don’t give a fuck -yes you do- about the work, “is boring and you have to work and make an effort” -isn’t it obvious? yes but the fact is what makes you nauseous-, but you’re responsable. First, you’re criticizing and complaining but you know at the end you’re doing it. Could be because you want to be free later, not having any work that would bother you. your motivation comes from a final reward. you overwork yourself SO MUCH. You have to do something bc if not your mind would think uncontrollably, and you would kill yourself -IM JOKING DONT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY.

I knew someone with a taurus moon in the 2H with sag + scorpio placements that wanted to be seen as open minded when they weren’t. They constantly affirmed “talk to me, I’m open minded, don’t worry, I won’t judge” and then their expressions evidenced the opposite. But obviously the generation and how they grew affects it.

Eros 10H: GOD they are SO ashamed, shy when it comes to talk about sex. The worst of all is they try to act calm and to cover how they’re truly feeling. they’re being serious and they keep mentioning “yes, it’s important to talk about this”, they even quote😭. Could be because they want to keep their reputation/image intact. It’s so hilarious to me, could be because I have Eros in Sagittarius.

—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•—•

•This is based on my personal experience.

•English is not my first language.

•I’m not a profesional astrologer.

Thank youu. baibaiii🫣🫶🏼💋

Do not copy. Please give me credits.

[duckymcdoorknob]

Ducky hi I hope this isn’t a bother but I have an oddly specific emergency request??

I’ve been struggling with atypical anorexia for years. I keep gaslighting myself that it’s not that bad because I’m not skinny enough to look sick. I feel like it’s no big deal because it wouldn’t hurt for a fat girl like me to stop eating right? Hah sorry. Bad joke…

anyways, I saw that you write for Genshin and I was wondering if I can have Cyno and/or Tighnari comfort me? It can be separate or together but maybe can you make it that we’re classmates and he/they notice us?

thank you for even taking the time to read this and I hope you have a really good day 🥲

Oh my god anon hi

It’s like my brain was fucking cloned and copied into yours.

Fear not my liege, I’ll do both of them bc I’m infatuated with them both.

This is EXACTLY what I face on the daily.

I hope this isn’t too triggering because I really projected into these. I kinda just emptied my mind into the doc

(Oh no, Cyno’s got long)

I want you to know that you are deserving of food. No matter your size, food is fuel and you NEED to eat.

CW BELOW THE CUT: Reader has An0r3xia, Symptoms of An0r3xia, Self-hatred and Self-depreciation Ducky is essentially venting in this post

ALL REQUESTS ARE CLOSED!! THIS IS AN OLD REQUEST

𝑇𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑛𝑎𝑟𝑖

The course of your life changed long ago, and you can’t exactly remember what “inspired” you to take the path that you did. However, you’d been plagued with negative thoughts for years, and decided to take action.

What you didn’t take into account was the people that you would hurt in the process…

Tighnari wasn’t expecting you to enter his life. You were a Haravatat student, and he was an Amurta student. Your paths were not technically supposed to cross. But, somehow you both ended up in the same required arithmetic class.

The first day went as always, your professor would explain the outline of the course, you’d introduce yourself to your seat-mate, and that would be it.

Little did you know, your seat-mate would be the one to save you from yourself…

The fennec leaned over to you, and in a whispered voice said, “If he doesn’t stop talking about his cat, I might just walk out.”

You giggled a little, to his delight, replying, “Walking? Man, you’re calm. I’m ready to drop out entirely.”

You earned a snort in reply. You watched the student next to you try not to erupt into laughter. “Tighnari.” He managed through his scattered breaths.

“(Y/N).” You replied with a smile. “Need any water? You’re looking a little…”

“Mm mmnh, fine, fine. I’m fine…” He blew an exhale through his lips as he gently fanned himself with his hand. “No laughing here.”

From that moment on, the two of you became friends. Your torturous arithmetic class became your favorite part of the day, and you looked forward to seeing Tighnari every time you went.

Eventually, all good things must come to an end. Your disorder had caught up with you, and you started to behave differently.

You started to slowly deteriorate. You became more reserved, nauseous and irritable. Your daily caloric intake sunk drastically, and you did not feel good whatsoever. Every time you stood, gravity was begging for you to go back down.

Ideally, this was not what a human should face, but this is what you greatly desired deep down. The pain in your stomach, head, knees, chest, it all meant that you were doing what you thought you needed to do.

One day during arithmetic, you were completely spaced out. You couldn’t focus on anything aside from your pounding head and starving stomach. A loud growl emitted from your abdomen, but you could scarcely hear it over the ringing in your ears.

Tighnari looked upon you worriedly, noticing you gag while your professor talked about the breakfast he had. When class was dismissed, you practically jumped to your feet to leave, promptly causing you to stumble and brace yourself on him for support.

“(Y/N)-“

“I’m… I’m fine.” And with that, you quickly left the room and rushed to the top floor of the library, in a spot that only you and your best friend knew about. After climbing the stairs, you fell onto the beanbag chair, panting heavily and holding your throbbing head. What was wrong?

You didn’t have much time to focus on why you were feeling so feeble, due to hearing frantic footsteps climbing the stairs behind you.

“Please, go away,” you whimpered as you tried to calm yourself. “I don’t want anyone to see me. Please just leave me alone.”

“I’d be a fool to leave you like this.” The person sat down next to you, looking at you with sympathetic eyes.

You looked to your left to meet aquamarine colored irises, blaring holes through you. “Tighnari…” With a wobbling lip, your tears started to bubble up again.

“I’m here… I’m here… it’s okay,” he soothed, moving to kneel in front of you. “What’s going on?”

“I… I-“ you wanted nothing more to explain, but would he believe you? You didn’t look sick enough, so who were you to claim you had an eating disorder. “I’m j-just not fee-feeling well.” You lied

“(N/N), please don’t lie to me…” he begged. “I may be reaching way too far out of proportion, but-“ his face screwed into one of sympathy as he looked at your terrified eyes, securing his fears. “With everything I’ve been noticing-“ he sighed. “If… If you’re having problems eating, you can tell me.”

You froze, breath stopping completely. “I-I don’t have-“ you scoff in disbelief at him. How did he figure that out from just your symptoms? “Look at me, Tighnari. I’m too fat to have an eating disorder.”

“Anyone of any size can have an eating disorder.”

“Not someone like me.” You shook your head as pitiful laughter bubbled out of you. “Someone like me doesn’t have an eating disorder. It doesn’t matter how hard I try, I never make any progress. That’s kinda how it works, and I can’t manage to make it work.”

“I’m obsessed with what I eat and how much I eat, and no one fucking believes me. Archons, it wouldn’t matter to the public if I just completely stopped eating. It would honestly be better knowing that I wasn’t stuffing my face all of the time. Maybe I’d actually drop a few pounds if I-“

“(Y/N).” The archer’s heart sank to the ground as he heard what you thought of yourself.

“What?”

“Can I please give you a hug?”

You paused, taking in his face. Tighnari looked absolutely distressed, almost as if he was about to cry. “Y-Yes please.” You whimpered.

Without further need for conversation, you slumped your head against his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around your waist, and another around your shoulders as his hand cradled the side of your head. His padded thumb gently stroked your cheek.

“You, (N/N),” he began. “Are absolutely beautiful.”

The words made your breath catch in your lungs.

“I think you’re stunning atop of being your size. You don’t need to be a certain weight to be beautiful, you just need to be yourself. There will never not be someone trying to get under your skin, but it’s important that you stay positive. It’s like my mother always said: not everyone will want to be your friend, and that’s okay.”

The fennec sniffled, using his thumb to wipe his eyes. “What I’m saying is: you don’t have to change yourself for someone else to think you’re worthy. You brighten my life just by being alive, please don’t try to change who you are.”

“It absolutely breaks my heart to hear what you think about yourself.” Guilt washed over you as you heard his voice start to break with sniffles and tears. “A-And I don’t know h-how I’d manage if I-I lost you… (Y/N), I can’t b-bear to have to think of burying my b-best friend.”

You closed your eyes as your lip wobbled. It wasn’t long before a sob ripped from your throat and you broke down in loud lamentations.

He held you tighter, eyes closed, hot tears running down his cheeks, as he allowed you to finally release all of the woes and feelings that you had been holding in for so long.

“I’ve got you…” he whispered. “Don’t worry about a thing…”

It took a while for you to calm down, but ultimately, you did. You laid still in Tighnari’s embrace, playing with a few locks of his hair that hung loosely in front of you. “I’m sorry to cause you so much trouble…”

“Don’t be.” He replied with a patient grin, eyes focused on the people outside. “I’m just glad that you told me. To be honest, I was missing your usual quips in arithmetic.”

You snorted in amusement. “You’re only saying that to make me feel better.”

He cocked a brow and pursed his lips. “(N/N), my only other source of “comedy” is Cy-“

“Nevermind.” You interrupted.

The fennec snorted and burst out into boisterous laughter. You couldn’t help but mirror his action, giggling over the lack of hesitation in your answer.

As seconds passed, and the two of you laughed, the tears that were in your eyes were replaced by ones of mirth. When the laughter subsided, you laid lax against his torso, sighing in contentment.

Maybe Tighnari would be right after all…

𝐶𝑦𝑛𝑜

Cyno has always been a very detail oriented person. He’s keen at catching tiny things that others may overlook.

It was the end of the academic year and final examinations were coming around. The Kshahrewar students decided to host a huge party, and your dearest friend was begging you to go with him.

You wanted nothing more than to deny, for you knew your ED would ruin the night. You had been caught in a pretty bad relapse lately, and you dared not to tell Cyno.

Regardless, you swallowed your fears and agreed with a patient smile.

“Great.” His lips upturned into a gentle grin. “I can’t wait.”

That evening, you spent hours looking for something to wear. Every outfit had some sort of issue, and you never found yourself satisfied with what you had on.

Eventually, you decided on the outfit that you hated the least, texted Cyno to alert him of your departure, and left your dorm feeling uneasy.

When you arrived at the party, you found your best friend analyzing the refreshment table, plate in hand. You made your way over to him, taking in his simple, yet fashionable, clothing choice.

“Hey.” He smiled as he looked at you. He caught glimpse of your outfit and whistled, “You look hot, (N/N).”

You couldn’t help but giggle a bit at his flattery. “You’ve been waiting a while to pull that card, havent’cha?”

A simple shrug of amusement answered your question. “Im going to go say hello to Al-Haitham and Tighnari, wanna grab a plate and meet me outside?”

Your stomach dropped, but you never lost your smile. “Sure. I’ll see you out there.”

As Cyno retreated to say hello to his friends, you eyeballed the table. It was a beautiful array of food, but looking at it made you nauseous.

Your pupils flickered between sweet treats and savory snacks, the music drowning under the growing static in your ear. Your hands shook in protest as you went to grab a plate.

Having finished a, rather curt, exchange with Al Haitham, Cyno was deep in conversation with Tighnari. After a while, his eyes traveled back to the table, brows knit in confusion as he took in your demeanor. His face fell upon noticing…

You looked dazed. Your eyes absentmindedly pooled with tears as your quivering hand hovered back and forth between foods and back at your side. Eventually, you sighed in defeat and put the plate down with a loud groan, grabbing a bottle of water and retreating outside.

Words caught in his throat as he pointed to the door and attempted to stutter out an excuse to leave. Unbeknownst to him, Tighnari had seen the same thing and ushered the white-haired male after you.

When he went outside, Cyno couldn’t find you. You were nowhere to be seen in the backyard. It wasn’t until he heard gentle sniffling from above that it had dawned on him.

You were hiding out in a tiny treehouse that had been built by the Kshahrewar students as a final project. Those damn architects and their spare time…

He pushed aside his worries of cleanliness and began to scale the large tree. He carefully climbed up the ladder and silently entered the small, wooden house.

When your best friend’s eyes fell on you, his face dropped instantly. You had thrown on an oversized hoodie over your outfit, and were hugging your knees to your chest.

Cyno sat down next to you wordlessly, settling onto the dusty floor. He looked through the wooden window, eyes fixated on the twinkling stars.

“I’m sorry.” You murmured, not daring to look at him. “I ruined your fun.”

The white-haired male scoffed with amusement. “The only “fun” to be had was listening to Tighnari talk about a beetle that he found today. I love the guy, but sometimes I can only smile and nod and pretend to know what’s coming out of his mouth.”

His comment got a chuckle out of you, then an uncomfortable silence followed. “You feelin’ okay?” He asked gently.

“Not really, I’m not big into parties and I’m feeling sick.” You rest your head between your knees.

“Oh dear…” he mumbled. “Do you have water with you? Anything to snack on to get your levels regulated?”

You held up the bottle you had brought with you, not daring to speak.

“Good on the water part, but you need to eat something.”

“I’m not hungry.” Your stomach suddenly cried out for food, betraying you as you managed to curl in on yourself more.

The white-haired male sighed as he turned his head to look at you. “Do you wanna tell me what’s going on? Or do I have to force you?”

“Threatening me is not the way to get me to talk to you, Cyno.” You grumbled in reply, sneering a bit as you don’t move your head from its previous position.

“If that’s what it takes for you to tell me what’s wrong, I don’t care how it happens.” He said sternly. “Please, just tell me what’s going on.”

“It’s fine, I’m okay. Go have fun at the party.”

“(Y/N)-“

“I said I’m fine!”

Your head shoots up to reveal hot tears running down your cheeks, you lock eyes with Cyno and instantly feel guilty for yelling.

The white-haired male takes hold of both of your shoulders, gazing into your eyes. “You. Are. Not. Fine.” His fiery gaze is baring holes into you. “After what I saw a few minutes ago, I can’t believe you when you say that you’re fine. I just can’t-”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I know the signs, (Y/N). Please, tell me I’m wrong in what I’m thinking is going on, please... I care about you way too much for you to hurt yourself like this.”

His thumb comes up to wipe your tears, but it’s all in vain as you hang your head low and start to sob. Cyno is taken aback at the sudden outburst, but doesn’t fail to turn to comfort. “Oh honey… c’mere, it’s alright… it’s alright...” He soothed as he shifted to a kneeling position, wrapping his arms around you.

Through your sobs, you explained how you had been feeling lately. You explained your relapse, your self-hatred, the things you believed were true (when in reality they were not). Your best friend listened intently to every word, giving you his undivided attention.

When you were finished, Cyno did not reply, he only hugged you for a moment longer. When you broke free to wipe your eyes, that is when he finally spoke…

“I want to preface by apologizing. I didn’t even notice, and you’re one of my dearest friends… I’m so sorry.”

“S’okay.” You replied, resting your head on his shoulder.

He rested his head atop of yours, bringing a hand up to gently trace shapes on the small of your back. “I can’t entirely understand what you’re going through, but I do know what you’re feeling all too well…” he murmured. “I’m so sorry that you felt that you had to resort to this. You’re an incredible person, and I’m so lucky to call you my best friend… I couldn’t care less what you look like, or what you eat. I just wish that you felt that way too.”

“I just wanna be me again,” you whimpered. “I hate all of this. I’m tired all of the time, in pain, dizzy, everything just hurts and I’m starving but I can’t bring myself to eat anything. It’s- It’s crippling.”

“I know…” he soothed. “I wish that people understood how awful it is to have a calculator running in your head constantly. They see someone who looks like me and they think “he’s sick”. They see someone who might be on the heavier side and think “they’re an inspiration.” It’s unfair, and it’s repulsive. Anyone of any size can go through this.” He rambled,

Your eyes widened when you realized what his words meant. “Someone like you…? Wait, you? You’re-“

“For years, yes. I finally managed to get it under control when I entered the Akademiya. However, sometimes I still have moments like you’re in right now.”

“How did you recover?” You asked with hope in your voice.

Cyno gently held out his hand for you to take, which, to his delight, you did. “I met Tighnari,” he answered truthfully. “He helped me learn to love who I am… every inch of me. And I want to see if he can help you too. Do you think you’d be okay with that?”

You closed your eyes with a smile as you nodded tearfully. “Yes, please do so.”

A solemn silence was left in the treehouse until Tighnari had climbed his way up. He promptly said what everyone had been thinking: “Aw man, now my pants are all dirty.”

As you and Cyno laughed at his similar fate, you thought, for the first time in a while, that things might just be okay.

—————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎—————

[barbieaspiration]

day 3 of “hunger games”

i.e. the diet where you eat 50cals per 0.1lb that you lost from the previous day

i’m down 1.4 lbs from yesterday (which is frankly just the dumbest coincidence on the planet bc i’ve been plateaued for more than 3 weeks, and i haven’t dropped that much weight overnight in over a month but. whatever) so my budget today would be 700 cals, which is higher than i’ve eaten in a long time but sort of immediately proved itself reasonable by the fact that it took me several minutes and three separate tries to do the math to get the calorie amount

and because i haven’t been dropping weight, i feel really resistant to eating 700 cals bc it pretty much guarantees that the food will be stuck in my system for days which guarantees that i’ll be fasting for the next several days. but on the other hand, i started this diet in the first place because making the choice of when to eat and when to fast has been taking up like 95% of my mental real estate and making me anxious. so if i’m going to do that on the diet too, it defeats the purpose. so i’m just going to commit to doing what the numbers say to do and whatever happens happens bc what i’m doing clearly isn’t working

this, however, brings about the issue that i don’t even have anything that calorically dense in my house besides plain pasta, which doesn’t feel like a worthwhile use of 700 calories nutrition-wise. and it’s flooding from a storm, so i’m not going out or ordering delivery.

and i’m kind of annoyed bc all last week i was fighting for my life to not binge on cheesy pasta but now the thought of it makes me nauseous. life is pain, existence is a prison, etc etc

[plushiehamuko]

i do understand how tenko isn’t considered the most poorly handled danganronpa character (and i can also acknowledge she just straight up objectively isn’t if i set my bias aside) but i do wish there was more of a discussion around the stereotypes her character perpetuates and how that is harmful bc it feels kinda swept under the rug

bc to be completely honest, during my first v3 playthrough, tenko kinda made me uncomfortable and i didn’t really like her by the end of her time in the game. it wasn’t until i started reflecting on the game more weeks after playing when kaede became my favorite character. tenkaede kind of gave me a way to re-characterize tenko in a way that keeps what is genuinely really great about her but gets rid of the things that just make me feel like my sexuality is being mocked. however, i still can’t replay canon content; i remember paying extra money for danganronpa s to get her right away just for almost all of her interactions to be super disgusting (esp the one with chihiro that i got physically nauseous from playing), her ftes are poorly written and full of even more stereotypes than her original character and give people a way to act like her lesbian-coding is just trauma as if being sapphic is a trauma response, and i just. hate all of it.

and i know i bring this up a lot, but the way a lot of people talk about tenko really is problematic. i’ve seen people use her character as an excuse to be lesbophobic way too many times (from little microaggressions to cishet people literally calling her a dyke in a derogatory way to people talking about how they want to commit various acts of violence towards her, you name it and i’ve seen it all somewhere). and i think a lot of the existing discourse around her is tiring and just completely missing the point (whether she’s straight or bi, whether she’s a terf or not, stuff like that)

sorry i get so angsty about this, it’s just bc tenko is really really really special to me but participating in this fandom when it comes to her just. really sucks sometimes, thank you for listening okkkk i’ll stop complaining now

[fagmegumi]

u not a lesbian tho ur bisexual

Okay so let me clear this up not even for the benefit of anon but for my mutuals who don’t know me irl and may get the wrong impression from it.

what i meant to say in those tags is that the reason i still feel comfortable going to women’s places in my current state of existence is that 1) lesbianism AND womanhood both come in many diverse flavors of gender experiences so to speak 2) ERGO even lesbians who are straight up cis women can and will be attracted to people with various kinds of gender experiences, both “internally” so to speak (‘identity’) and “externally” (various configurations of genitals, breasts or lack thereof, body hair, presentation, etcetc.) this isn’t the case for ALL obviously but its certainly the case for some. Like I personally know lesbians who know about my gender situation and would still fuck me lol im not even being prescriptive rn as you point out i am NOT a lesbian and its not up to me to say what they should or shouldnt do. Im literally describing reality. 3) as i exist right now, i am a person with breasts, a pussy, and a relatively feminine face (though invisalign is doing wonders on my jawline, werk!). To say that no lesbian who sees me in a bar dancing could possibly be attracted to the person they see is genuinely so far out of the bounds of reality it boggles the mind. Also this is neither here nor there but i don’t exactly consider myself a “man”, like I would never want to fill the social role of ‘man’ the way a cis man does. That’s why i call myself transmasc but not a trans man. If id been born with a penis and assigned male at birth and raised a boy etcetc, i would STILL want to socially and/or medically transition bc I simply dont see myself as a genuine 100% man the way i dont see myself as a woman.

If i ever do manage to get hrt and I acquire more masculine characteristics etc the situation will be different, like I wouldnt feel as comfortable going to spaces for women. Also I should specify that the bar i went to today does not call itself a “lesbian bar”, it is a bar for queer women of any sexuality (and their friends and allies of other genders). Not every single person in there was a woman, and not every single woman was a lesbian. Statistically in fact many of them were probably bisexual, and honestly assuming otherwise is lowkey pretty biphobic lol

lastly, i also want to specify that, even if im pre-transition and i look for all intents and purposes like a cis woman (something that makes my life hell in many generic lgbt places, where the general misogynistic and boys-club vibe makes it so gay dudes will tolerate me at best and assume im a ‘fag hag’) i still would never have sex with a lesbian without clarifying my gender situation to them first. I simply would not feel comfortable with that in fact the thought makes me pretty nauseous. But at the same time 1) i know (again, for a fact) there are plenty of people who use the label of lesbian who WOULD fuck me even after knowing and 2) i dont think grinding a little on a stranger in a bar you saw from a cross the room and found really hot, or even having a short dancefloor makeout with them, is anywhere on the same level.

[tiptapricot]

4, 12 and 20 for Moses!

OHHHFGG these r rlly good ones o boy…

4. Has your character ever witnessed something that fundamentally changed them? If so, does anyone else know?

Moses has witnessed a lot that’s changed him, so I’ll give some snapshots from diff points in life, though I can not go fully in depth bc it. Would end up being way too long.

After being sent away by his mother to survive outside of the life she was able to give him, he returned to find his childhood home was now owned by another family. Which he should’ve expected, but something about realizing there was no Thing to return to, no people and no place, really changed his view on nostalgia and connection and in a lot of ways made him feel even more bitter about memories he’d kept as comforting ones, because if there was no way to revisit that feeling concretely, what was the point? He doesn’t talk about his childhood or his early life anyone. Some things may have ended up in songs in an abstract sense but he refuses to talk about it solidly, even if things still cling to him.

Seeing Antez and Romero for the first time, seeing Antez break into something otherworldly and perhaps even eat someone was a profound moment of fear and belonging and revelation for him. It solidified who they were to him, what they were, and gave this sick release of any need to hide or to quell violent urges that alienated him from others. They know that, not because he’s talked about it but because his awe is palpable and they can tell he enjoys their physicality a lot.

Further in the future, Moses meets another trans man solidly, truly, and it causes such a profound and complicated explosion of worldview that he makes some very very bad choices and is unable to regulate his feelings. Everyone knows about this, because it causes a disaster.

12. In what situation was your character the most calm they’ve ever been?

The night he performed his own top surgery was frantic and emotional and intense, a buzzing desperate thing that needed to happen. But the morning after… even aching and healing and bandaged and tired and nauseous… the relief was so potent. And it was also probably from blood loss, but he was so tired and calm and happy… He gets smaller moments still. His brain is fast and paranoid but he finds lulls while working on writing music, or sitting on Antez and Romero’s porch, or feeling the touring carriage jostle around him when his thoughts just smooth and quiet, and he gets to be.

20. In what ways does your character compare themselves to others? Do they do this for the sake of self-validation or self-criticism?

Moses is constantly comparing for both reasons. He’s comparing himself to men around him, critical of his own performance of gender and whether or not people can tell he isn’t the “right” kind of man or not, and this often falls into self-criticism and hate. But he also compares himself to other singers and performers, to critics and people who have reached success with a vitriolic kind of tearing down that boosts his ego and makes him extremely confidant in himself. He often swings between extremes, and is constantly aware of himself and those around him and the state of his own performance of personhood.

I think one of the best moments of self reflection and comparison has come from his connection with Romero, of getting to find intimacy with someone else who doesn’t show skin and who has a feeling of separation from others. That ends up funky in some ways as it furthers Moses’s sense of humanity from himself, but it’s not inherently toxic, and gives him a similar-ish experience for awhile that makes him feel less alone, and even desired for his state of self.

Send me a character developing OC ask!

[prodigaldaughteralice]

Okay take two on this bc tumblr ate the first one

My mum really freaked me out this morning and I can’t tell her so because she’d think I was blaming her and get defensive but I need to vent about it so here goes

(Uh, under the jump there’s going to be some references to a semi-gory old injury, body image shit, self harm, diets, and my grandparents’ messy divorce?)

So my mum was telling me this anecdote about when she was a kid and cut her finger really badly on a broken glass doing the dishes. Her parents were both separately at therapy, and I guess she/her siblings didn’t know how to dial on the rotary phone? So she went next door to the neighbours’ house bc they had a touch-tone phone, and she called her mother bc she had the number where she’d be, but her mother said “I’m in therapy call your father”. So she called her father, and he said that because his therapy was individual and hers was group his was more important so she should go. And apparently they ended up arguing about this over the phone for a while, mum holding her finger shut waiting for someone to call her back, until eventually her mother called her to say she was coming. Mum said “mom lost the argument with dad, but won with the kids because she was the one who actually came to take me to the hospital”. 

She got stitches and everything was fine; she has a scar now but the finger works fine and all. 

But she told me that while she was sitting there looking at this deep gash in her finger she could see a blob of yellow fat in it, just like the drawings in science class of the layers of skin. And she said that because she “was a chubby kid, before [she] lengthened out as a teenager”, she looked at it and wanted to just pull it out, as if the removal of that blob of fat would tip the scales and make her not have to be chubby anymore.

And she told it as a funny anecdote about child brain, you know? But it just fucking knocked me flat, because when I was really deep in my cutting habit that was something I thought about all the time. I wanted to cut deep enough to pull the fat out, or just cut off the inner curves of my thighs entirely. I remember wanting that so badly, knowing it wouldn’t work but wishing it would, and having those feelings suddenly rush back up just made me feel so, so sick. It really freaked me out. Made me feel so nauseous/guilty/sick, and it’s still twisting in my chest. I haven’t actually cut in years and years but the desire to does still float up now and then and it just. I don’t know, man. 

I just. I don’t know how to deal with this? I don’t know how to deal with my mother. She’s been trying to lose weight pretty much my whole life, she’s bounced around between different diets, now she’s doing keto and intermittent fasting, and it’s even harder for her because she’s got a bunch of food intolerances. And she talks about it, a lot! To me! And she means no harm, I know she means no harm, it’s just what’s in her head so she wants to share, but it just stresses me out really badly, strengthens the thing where I feel intensely guilty about everything I eat. And sometimes I can handle it and sometimes I can’t, and just recently her sister sent us a bunch of old photos we hadn’t had before, and we were looking through them together and my mum kept pointing out people’s body types? Like, talking about how her mother had ‘ballooned’ after the divorce, like “oh you can see this is before that because your grandma’s not fat yet” and talking about how skinny she was as a teenager (mum you were literally starving you have told me about this before about how you and your mother didn’t have enough money after my grandfather fucked off to California) and it just circles around my head as this constant “is that how she sees me is that how she talks about me”

Every time I come up to the breakfast table in a fitted shirt and she makes some comment about my little waist I want to puke because my waist isn’t as little as it was when I was a teenager and I hate my fat thighs lol

And the other day she had this moment of like. Realization? We were talking and she’d said something about my late uncle’s weight loss on the family groupchat and then she said aloud to me that she’d considered not mentioning it there because she didn’t want to tip anyone off that I was thinking about weight (which I wasn’t more than usual but we were talking about it bc that’s what she talks about) but that she’d realized that my sister or dad (the other people on the groupchat) would just assume she’d been the one to bring it up, because she often is… and then she just started sobbing. And she said “this is what I have instead of a life”, and she apologized to me for this being the backdrop of my young adulthood. And I didn’t want to pretend that it wasn’t true or that it doesn’t hurt me but I also didn’t want to reiterate those things because she was obviously really upset already so I just hugged her and said I was sorry— in a sympathy way, not an apology way— until she was feeling a little better. 

And so I’m worried about her, I’m always worried about her, but also she keeps talking about these things all the time even after she had that moment and it’s heavy. It’s really heavy. And now I’m thinking about how much I used to want to cut my fat out and how I still kinda wish I could even though I know it doesn’t work that way and how my brain is kinda reprogrammed to want to cut out any issue with my skin (bug bites acne etc, I just have this impulse of “just cut that bit off it’ll be fine” and I never follow up on it but I still think it) and it’s just

a lot

[merriclo]

hey im talking abt my eoe. vent warning lmao

oh also. lots of discussion of food and difficulties eating cause eoe is an esophageal disorder :(

sooo my meds stopped working a while ago :) and for the past like month and a half i’ve randomly been getting that horrible burning pain in my throat and back. and it’s at the worst fucking times too. a few days ago my adhd pill got stuck in my esophagus and i was holding back tears all orchestra rehearsal. which okay a) fucking humiliating, and b) fucking humiliating.

i feel like i can’t even eat anything anymore too like it’s also so damn painful. sometimes even my own spit feels like acid dude. i can’t even eat a pear without wanting to cough it all up

and it’s painful as hell when i’m trying to sleep too so i’ve been having the world’s shittiest sleep for the past month and a half. and now my grades are dropping not only because i have close to no sleep + no nutrition but also bc fun fact my adhd meds aren’t working anymore either!!!!! yippie!!!!!!! so i can’t remember or understand basically anything and it’s infuriating

idk i know this isn’t that serious but the pain has been getting worse and i keep feeling nauseous but i can’t just puke and get it over with. and it’s the first quarter of the year and so now all my teachers think i’m a fucking idiot cause i don’t have the heart to just tell them

live laugh love ig man idk.

[toomuchdickfort]

Nightly character brain

[somnambulants]

Can i request readerxnatasha first time? All good if you don't write smut though xx

she’s the sunset in the west

word count: 1.7K notes: i kinda combined this with another prompt: "intertwining your hands with your lover while making love" bc im feeling v soft today lmao hope you enjoy!  warnings: allusions to lack of bodily autonomy/coerced interactions. 

minors pls don’t interact! 18+ only!

Sex has always been a weapon for her.

Natasha knows she can get whatever she wants from whoever she wants if she just flaunts herself in front of them enough to get their attention. She’s not naïve; her whole life has been set up for her to use her body to get what she wants.

It’s something they teach you in the red room from the time you can walk: your body is your biggest weapon. No one will anticipate you coming.  

And it’s true. 

No one ever sees her coming. 

Natasha has walked into many rooms and turned many heads and managed to take out multiple targets with all eyes on her and without anyone batting those eyes because they were so distracted by her.

It’s where the term black widow comes from. You see her but you don’t see her.

And that’s how she lives her life, with people seeing her but not seeing her. It’s what makes her such a good spy; such a good assassin. People might know she’s dangerous from the second they see her but they’ll be dead and she’ll be long gone before they realise exactly just how dangerous.

No one seems to see through it.

Until she meets you.

You, who met her while she was half naked and soaking wet, everything on display, after a mission had gone slightly wrong and didn’t even blink twice as you shrugged off your own jacket and handed it to her with a kind smile while some of her own teammates struggled to keep their eyes to themselves.

She’s pretty sure she fell in love with you right then and there, with your eyes on the ground, pointedly averted, a faint pink flush staining both of your cheeks and crawling down your neck.

--

Your relationship with Natasha is great. Amazing, in fact. You don’t think you could ask for better or more.

There’s just one thing really.

Sometimes you don’t feel like she’s really there when you’re being intimate. In the moment. Sometimes it’s as though she’s going through the motions and just doing what she feels needs to be done. Or what she thinks you want her to do.

Like right now.

She’s kissing you like she’s on autopilot. You love kissing her and you’re enjoying it, no doubt about that, as you sit splayed across her lap with her arms around you like a cage. 

 You love it. And her.

It just doesn’t feel quite right. 

You know, subconsciously, there must be a reason you’ve been dating for all these months and haven’t had sex yet. You know Natasha has had a lot of sex and you’re not exactly inexperienced yourself in that department.

And yet, every time you get close, she’ll suddenly push you away and make an excuse to leave. 

You know there must be a reason. You just don’t know why or how to broach the subject with her. 

Or you thought you didn’t.

“Why don’t you want to have sex?”

You don’t mean for it to slip out and you cover your mouth as soon as it does, but the damage is already done.

Below you, Natasha, hands still on your waist – at a perfectly decent height, as though she thinks your parents might walk in and catch you at any second – freezes and looks at you with wide eyes.

“I – I do,” she says after a second, stuttering a little over her words. It would be amusing in any other circumstance to see Natasha Romanoff, the most unflappable person you’ve ever met in your life, struggling for words.

You stare at her until she swallows and looks away from you. “I do,” she repeats, quiet in a way that is distinctly non-Natasha like. “I’m just not used to this.”

It doesn’t make sense to you, what she’s saying but you stay quiet, sensing she’s building up to something and not wanting to interrupt her when it seems like she’s opening up to you about something important.

“I don’t know how to do …,” she waves a hand in between you wordlessly. You know you must look as confused as you feel because she lets out a huff of frustration. “I don’t know. This –It’s hard. For me. To do this with someone I care about.”

She looks so defeated as the words leave her mouth. You suck in a breath as realisation starts to sink in, feeling nauseous at the implication you’re getting from what she’s just said.

“We don’t have to do anything, Nat, ” you say quietly, tilting your head so she has to look at you as you speak. “Not now. Not ever…. if that’s not something you want. I’m sorry if I --”

“No! No!” she interrupts. She seems to have pinpointed where your thoughts have gone and she leans in, looking at you seriously. “No. Of course I want to. I just don’t know how…I’m used to..”

She doesn’t have to finish. You know exactly what she means and for a second, you’re overcome with such vibrant anger at the thought that no one has ever treated her the way she deserves.

You want to make sure she never feels like that again.

“Okay,” you say slowly, as a plan formulates in your head. You’re not sure if it’s the right thing to do but Natasha is looking at you uncertainly, like she thinks you’re going to up and run at any minute so you have to act fast. “Okay, if you’re sure. Can I try something? Please?”

Still looking uncertain, Natasha nods straight away. You lean in to kiss her gently and she immediately reciprocates, pulling you closer, deepening the kiss as though you’ll pull away at any moment.

After you break the kiss, you slide off her lap and then off the couch all together, kneeling down so you’re in front of her.

There’s confusion in her eyes as you do but you don’t address it until you’re settled.

You place your hands on her thighs. “Tell me to stop, okay?” The if you’re uncomfortable goes unsaid but you know she must be able to see it written across your face because she nods, biting her lip.

Hands still on her thighs, you kiss every spot you can reach and are delighted as she lets out a little laugh.

Encouraged, you continue until you reach her thighs.

Watching her carefully, you shift, helping her out of her underwear and pulling it down her legs. As you do, she looks back at you evenly, a little smile now playing around the corners of her mouth.

Internally, you breathe a sigh of relief. This was the right move then. You’re sure of it now. 

This is the most relaxed you’ve seen her like this, you think. You hate that you hadn’t noticed any of this earlier.

But at least, you can do your best from now on by knowing what to look for.

You move your hands, and seeming to read your mind, she meets you in the middle, letting you intertwine your fingers on either side of her thighs as you rest your head on her stomach, watching her for any signs that she isn’t as comfortable with this as she seems. “Okay?”

You can’t see anything in her eyes to indicate it isn’t but still, you wait until she nods, giving you the green light. 

“Yeah,” she says, as you lean back down. Her hips buck a little at the first touch of your tongue against her and she lets out a little breath, biting her lip as she looks at you with darkened eyes: “Yes.”

You continue, encouraged by her little moans and sounds that she makes no attempt to stifle, wasting little time detaching one of your hands to press a finger into her and inhaling sharply as you feel how wet she is around you.

Your actions are rewarded with a moan that quicky turns into a high-pitched gasp as you add another finger quickly after.

You thrust into her, picking up speed as she moans, shoving her hips onto your fingers eagerly in a plaintive request for more. She gets louder as you add a third and you feel her stretch around you. Louder still, when you brush over her clit with your thumb. 

“Okay?” you ask again, a little teasingly. No doubt hearing it, she glares down at you but can’t quite hide the smile on her face, pushing her hips up to meet your fingers.

The smile quickly crumbles in favor of a small cry as you thrust into her harder. Her eyes flutter a little and she bites down on her lower lip. “So okay.”

With your fingers now inside her, you turn your attention to her clit, laving your tongue with it and trying not to grin when she cries out, squeezing you so tightly it’s hard for you to keep going at the pace you are.

She squeezes your hand, digging her nails into your skin as her thighs lock around your head and keep you in place.

In response, you double your efforts and are rewarded as she starts to fall apart above you. 

There’s blissful white noise in your head as she arches her back with a moan – filthier and louder than the rest, as she comes -- cutting off your air supply entirely to the point that you wouldn’t be surprised if you blacked out.

You wouldn’t mind. In fact, you think this would be the best possible way to go.

When she finally releases you, you stay where you are, ignoring the cramp in your legs and rest your head on her stomach again, gazing up at her as she comes down, still twitching occasionally.

She runs her free hand through your hair rhythmically as her chest rises and falls, trying to catch her breath. 

She looks like, for lack of better words, a mess. Hair sticking to her neck, cheeks flushed. She’s still wearing her bra, but the straps are now falling down, off her shoulders.

You think you probably don’t look any better yourself.

She’s so beautiful you think you could stare at her for the rest of your life and not get bored.

You squeeze the hand you’re still holding and her eyes flutter open, meeting yours immediately. “All good?” you ask softly.

She lets out an incredulous sounding little huff, pulling you up so you’re in her lap and she can kiss you.

You moan as she licks the taste of herself off your lips.

“Very much good,” she says, playfully, when you pull apart to breathe for a second.

She kisses you again, deeper and more intensely before shoving you away and reversing your positions. “Your turn.”

[jhopezwrld]

CAN U DO THR REST OF BTS AS DADS PLS I NEED IT FOR MY SOUL

oh i absolutely can, my dearest!

cw // pregnancy, babies, general fluffiness :]

kim seokjin: 

obsessed with your pregnancy glow. he literally stares at you 24/7 to the point where it’s almost creepy

“jin, you’re staring again.” “i know, i can’t help it” 

is disgusted with your weird cravings but will make whatever you ask of him, even if the pickles and marshmallow combination makes him nauseous

very very emotional during your entire pregnancy. you’d think HE was the one who was pregnant

watery eyed during every ultrasound appointment

cried so hard he almost gagged when he first heard the heartbeat

and when you found out you were having a little boy? mans almost passed the fuck out

the first person he told the gender to was jungkook who also cried with him and kept a copy of the ultrasound photo in his wallet 

at this point, you’re basically the 8th member of the group. the boys treat you like family

jimin always wants to feel your tummy and when he first felt the baby kick, he was weirded out that you could see it but loved the feeling. hes always shopping for maternity clothes with you and makes sure you know you’re a bad bitch even though it looks like you swallowed a watermelon

taehyung is always taking super cute pictures of you and your bump and just super cute photos of you and jin and the boys and he makes a scrapbook for you and jin as a gift after your son is born

namjoon loves to ask a bunch of questions about your pregnancy and buys jin one of those pregnancy books but ends up reading it himself. he’s also always buying cute baby stuff he sees. you literally have a never ending supply of baby clothes and toys bc joon has no self control

hoseok likes to do prenatal yoga with you and is always looking up new moves to try or ways to relieve some of your aches and pains. is also always down to rub your shoulders and takes you on walks all the time

yoongi is such an enabler and is always indulging your cravings when jin isn’t around. if you’re craving anything at any hour, just let him know and boom he’s at your house with multiple takeout bags and in his comfiest pajamas, ready to pig out and watch netflix

and jungkook is the most excited about the baby, aside from jin (he actually might be more excited than jin). he’s at your house all the time. the spare room at your house is practically his now. he loves to feel the baby kick and talks to your tummy whenever he can. the two of you get so close during your pregnancy he’s basically your baby brother at this point. he’s also asks the sweetest questions about the baby and your pregnancy all the time 

“noona, do you think the baby will recognize my voice when he comes out?” 

“noona, can i come to your lamaze class with you? i wanna help out too!” 

GRRRR he’s the cutest ever . anyways-

jin is singing to your belly all the time. not a night goes by where he isn’t singing some sort of lullaby or something. even if it’s just over the phone

will definitely put a pair of headphones over your belly so your son can listen to bts

“babe, he probably won’t even remember this when he comes out” “no no no, he knows his appa’s voice!” 

once you go into labor, he’s freaking the fuck out. he’s more scared than you are.  

you gotta call yoongi to drive you two to the hospital bc he’s the most calm and jin is about to pass out again

he let’s you squeeze his hand as hard as you need to while pushing

and when he hears your sons first cry, he cries too. the nurses are kinda concerned bc he sounds like a dying donkey but it’s kinda endearing.

he’s so scared to hold him because he’s so much smaller than he could’ve imagined and he’s just so fragile

feels his heart grow 100 sizes while watching you hold your son for the first time

immediately sends pictures to the group chat he has with the boys

“5lbs 6oz, kim daeshim, born at 5:47 pm!!!!”

kookie is the first to reply with a bunch of crying emojis and hearts and asks when he can come see his joka (nephew)

eventually they all trickle in throughout the day, admiring how quiet and tiny your son is

jungkook is the first to hold him and he definitely cries a little bit bc he’s just so happy for the two of you

“yah, he’s so beautiful. are you sure he’s yours, hyung?” “fuck off, yoongi.”

he’s so scared to bring him home but is very relieved to be out of the hospital

he drives so slow the entire way home

loves watching you breastfeed in a non-sexual way. he’s just so enamored with how your body works

just watching you be a mother makes him so inexplicably happy!

he’s already for another one but won’t tell you yet

[kiwibirbs-library]

Bc your event is so beautiful and amazing and you are so beautiful and amazing and you deserve every one of those followers and so much more and you are an amazing friend and- *deep breath*

I have a request.

How does 🍓+🍊+💧+ our lovely insomniac Shinsou sound?

Thank you in advance. Whatever yo write will be out of this world! 💞

a/n: I- I love you so much oh my god also I love how one of these was probably made specifically for shinsou lmao

300 followers event!

Pairing: shinsou x reader

Warning: one asshat of a guy in the mall

Summary: when you get stopped from beating a guy up at the mall by Shinsou, it's only right to thank him right?

🍓 - “So that’s flirting? Hm, I always thought it would be more smooth.”

🍊 - “oh my god no.” “What what’s wrong?!” “I’m in love with him…. HIM of all people???”

💧- “if you do not shut up and kiss me right now…”

Not read through

You were with a small group of the students that took a trip to the mall. In all honesty, it was supposed to be a grocery trip but after talking on the drive over you all agree that you wanted to go shopping a bit before going back to the dorms. You hummed along as everyone chatted in their groups. Mina and you talked about a great new songs while Midoriya rambled on about something to Todoroki and Shinsou. The boys walked in front of you two as you went so know one saw the weird guy coming until he spoke.

At first it was only you and Mina that heard his statement about how he loved school uniform skirts, both of you beginning to speed up a bit to catch up with the boys. And then he whistled.

Now this caught all five of your attentions. All three boys slowed a bit and tried to get you and Mina in front of them.

"What's wrong sweethearts? Why don't you slow down a bit and have a chat with me hmm?" he drawled, speeding up to catch up with you two. You looked back to glare at him and he smiled. It made you nauseous. "oh~, looks like this missy likes me. Guess Pinky over there isn't as smart as this one," you froze in your spot.

All four of of your friends eyes widened. You slowly turned around to the guy behind you all.

"wow and thats a UA uniform too. Can't believe they allowed pinky in then, she doesn't seem to bright," he laughed to himself.

"that's it," you launched yourself at him without a second thought. Shinsou barely had the time to wrap and arm around your waist and drag you back. You fought against his grip but he held you tight to the ground. "let me at em," you growled as the man backed away in shock.

"Y/n it's ok, let's just go," Mina whispered to you, flipping the guy off as she turned around and walked away. She linked arms with Todoroki and Midoriya, dragging them away as Shinsou threw you over his shoulder and followed them. You glared at the man as he speed walked away.

"so thats flirting? Hm, always thought it would be more smooth," Shinsou commented as he finally put you down on your feet. You scoffed.

"you should have let me pummle him," you growled under your breath. Shinsou put a hand against your lower back, making sure you didn't go back.

"not looking to get kicked out of the mall," he whispered. You rolled your eyes, despite your anger you felt your cheeks flush lightly at his action. You all spent the rest of the time slightly tense before heading back for the day.

————

You groaned into Momo's pillow as the girls joined you on the large bed. Mina laughed as she laid next to you.

"trust me Y/n, I wanted to kick me too but flipping off and walking away is so much cooler," she laughed. You groaned a few noises that were probably supposed to be words even you didn't understand. "and besides," she leaned away from you and to the other girls, all of them leaning in a dipping the mattress. You rolled with the shift in weight, looking to all of them with a slight pout. "you did get some quality time with Shinsou," she giggled.

All the girls gasped as this.

"What?! Oh my god spill!" Higakure squealed. You blushed and rolled again, squeaking into Ochako's thigh.

"Weeell~ she tried to jump the guy right right!" Mina excitedly spoke to them all. "Shinsou grabbed her and carried her half way down the walk way and even after all that, he put a hand on her back to make sure she didn't do anything," Mina giggled. All the girls smiled brightly at this, Ochako lifted you up.

"He. Did. What?!" she giggled.

"What? It didn't mean anything!" you smiled and you spoke still, the thought of him.

"That smile says other wise," Jirou giggled. You rolled your eyes.

"Ok, ok, so what if he did smile at me really warmly. Or if he had a really pretty glint in his eyes as he talk to me..." you paused, eyes widening as you flipped back around and stared at the ceiling. “oh my god no.”

“What what’s wrong?!” Momo asked, leaning over you.

“I’m in love with him…. HIM of all people???” You almost whined as you covered your face with your hands. Sue laughed happily and grabbed your hand.

"Adorable!" she smiled. Your cheeks flushed bright red as you thought. You sat up and got off the bed.

"I need some water," you sighed, and rolled off the bed and went out the door. The girls cooed after you as you left. You tried to cool the heat in your face as went down to the kitchen, fanning your face slightly as you turned the corner.

Then you saw the lights were still on.

"Y/n?" you blushed at the sound of Shinsou's voice.

"heeeeyy Hitoshi," you poked your head in and he smiled at you warmly. You smiled happily and went to stand next to him. He set his cup down on the counter and leaned back on it. "whatcha doin?" You asked, hopping up onto the counter. He hummed.

"Couldn't sleep and thought that chocolate milk sounded good," he tapped the counter with his palms as you nodded.

"Same. Me and the girls were together and wanted some water," you kicked your feet out. Your legs brushed against his arm as it went. When you looked over you thought you were imagining his ears were flushed for a moment. When he turned to you, feeling your stare, you found the pink dusting his cheeks. You gulped. "oh um also uh... thank you, for earlier I mean," he tilted his head.

"what you mean catching you and stopping you from your pilot episode of the Y/n Villain Story?" he laughed.

"yeah that," you cleared your throat. "honestly if you didn't stop me I probably would have kicked him straight out the window. So thanks for carrying me and the hand on the back thing too. Honestly would have gone back but that made me freeze a bit," you laughed, not even thinking one what you were saying anymore.

"freeze?" he asked leaning closer to you.

"well ya why wouldn't I, I mean it's you and that sort of was out of no where and it made me really flustered. I didn't mind it though. Definitely not a bad thing in my opinio-" you stopped yourself as you register what the rambling topic was on.

"why'd you stop?" he smiled at you, flipping around so he leaned forward on the counter.

"stop what?" You coughed, looking away.

"Talking about that," he moved again, now if he moved a bit closer he would be fully in between your legs. You gulped at the croaked, lazy smile he gave you.

"well you know, isn't it wierd if I ramble about a guy that doesn't even like me ba-" Shinsou's brain shut off at what you were about to say. Did that mean that you...

“if you do not shut up and kiss me right now…” he stepped closer to you and put a hand on the back of your neck and pulling you in. Your eyes widened as his lips touched yours, smiling and closing them as your arms flung around his shoulders. He out a hand down on the counter next to you, leaning into you more. You laughed against him when you moved back a bit to breath. The only grumbled a bit, leaning in again. His kiss landed on your cheek as he made his way back to your lips. He felt your smile as he kissed you again.

"damn it I've been waiting to do that since forever now," he sighed against you. You were sure you cheeks were glowing at this point but you didn't care.

"I can taste your chocolate milk," you snorted. He laughed a bit as your wrap around him tightened slightly.

[mellowswriting]

Helping Hand

pairing || Din Djarin x fem!Reader

summary ||  The clasps on bras should not be so fucking difficult. It’s a good thing Mando doesn’t mind lending you a helping hand.

word count || 4,873

warnings || SMUT! p in v sex, kinda rough tbh, desperate Mando, cockwarming, a singular spank, love confessions bc I am soft for this man 

a/n || this was uh...something! I firmly believe that Mandalorians waste zero time once they find their person. Once they have them, they have them. No such thing as rushing to a Mandalorian, especially our TinCanMan. also, this gif destroys me

Main Masterlist  |  Join the taglist!

The second you saw the bra as you perused the marketplace, your face lit up. The fabric was rich in color and ridiculously soft and you knew the second you had your hands on it that you were buying it. It wasn’t too expensive, a few credits more than what you’d usually be willing to pay for clothes, but hey, you deserved to splurge every now and then. You practically bounced with excitement as you made your way back to the Crest where Mando and the little green kiddo you adored waited for your return. It was nice to get some time to yourself, time where you didn’t have to chase after a rambunctious kid or have to squeeze past Mando’s huge frame in the small spaces of the Crest, but what could you say?

You missed your boys. 

The ramp lowered as you drew closer and you smiled. Mando must have seen you approaching. The sight of him standing in the cockpit with the sleeping child cradled in his arm made your chest bloom with happiness. You paused on your way to set your bag on your bunk, distracted by the uncomfortable looking angle he held his arm at, and let out a quiet laugh. Mando’s silent tendencies left you to observe the way he held himself to discern how he was feeling, and after months of living with him, you could gauge him easily by the tilt of his helmet, the way he held his shoulders. You may not be fluent in Mando’a, but you were fluent in your Mandalorian. 

“He wakes up the second you lay him down, huh?” You asked, a teasing smile on your face. The sharp way he looked to you only confirmed your suspicion and you bit your lip to hold back another chuckle. “Here, let me.”

The child didn’t even stir when you fluidly slipped him from Mando’s arms and slowly settled him into the metallic cradle he slept in. Mando sighed loudly behind you, the sound roughed slightly by the modulator. “How are you so good at that?”

“It’s what I’m here for, isn’t it?” You turned and almost knocked back into the cradle at the proximity of the beskar-clad warrior, a mere few inches between your chests. Heat flared across your face. “It’s just, uh… just lotsa practice.” 

Mando hummed quietly and you instinctively looked to his shoulders and his hands, trying to gauge his mood. They were relaxed, the tension he always carried about him eased for the moment. Content, if you had to guess. It made you smile up at him, brighter than any sun in the galaxy. There weren't many times you saw him without that ready-to-action tension that plagued his surely sore muscles - almost always when the three of you were in the Crest, safe together as you hurtled through space. He turned just as quickly as he had approached you, stepping out of your space to set the coordinates to Nevarro, and you felt like you could finally exhale. 

Bag in hand, you practically stumbled into your bunk and pulled out the pretty bra you were so excited to put on - inky black, accentuated with intricately designed lace and a harness-like back. You pulled off your clothes quickly, stripping down entirely bare to slip into a soft pair of sleeping shorts. It would take a while to get back to Nevarro; you might as well be comfortable for it. The process of undressing while the Crest drew away from solid ground used to have you half naked and on the ground from the jostling, but thankfully you had grown proficient at balancing yourself through the rough takeoffs. 

A quiet sigh escaped you at the brush of the luxurious cloth against your bare skin, deft fingers latching the clasps at your back. It was a welcome change to the usual bras you wore. The straps were a bit too loose, allowing the cups to droop slightly from your breasts, and you fumbled to tighten them. It was just out of your grasp, your fingers grappling uselessly for the elusive adjuster as you huffed in annoyance.

“Need a hand?” Mando’s voice behind you made you startle almost comically and whirl around, one hand pressed against your chest where your heart was battering against your ribs. How in the hell did he always manage to move so silently? Heat bloomed up your neck and across your face unbiddenly. Sure, it wasn’t the first time he had seen you in some state of undress - living in such close quarters and the fact that Mando apparently never learned how to knock had him walking in on you often. But there was no denying the difference in you standing before him dressed practically in lingerie. 

“Uh, y-yeah, if you could?” You stuttered, internally groaning at your sudden inability to speak. The thick tension of the air could have choked you as you stared Mando down awkwardly until he twirled his finger, silently commanding you to turn around, and you could just die. “You just have to slide the, uh, adjuster up towards my shoulder.”

Mando said nothing and before you could move your hair out of his way, one gloved hand gathered it to settle over your shoulder and you had to tamp down on the shiver that tried to wriggle up your spine. He fiddled with the straps silently, leaving you to wrangle with your bordering on desperate need to climb the giant man behind you like a tree and lose yourself in the pleasures you could bring each other. 

You weren’t blind, nor were you stupid. Far from it, actually. Reading people was a gift you had possessed from a young age - one’s intent could easily be sussed by the specific light in their eyes, the slightest change in their tone, the barely-there shift in their body language. Mando may not speak often, you may not be able to watch for the arch of an eyebrow or the quirk of a lip, but you could still read him like a book. 

The fear of complication warred with your need. The child was a beacon of light in your life when you thought there could never be anything but swallowing darkness. He was a reminder of the little things that made everything else worth it - every coo, every small smile as he slept, every time he came running up to you or Mando on his little legs. Even when you were having to explain over and over again that no, he couldn’t eat the buttons off of the comlink, he brought you more joy than you could imagine. 

It didn’t help that every day spent flying through hyperspace left you growing closer to the Mandalorian. Even when there was nothing but silence between you, it was comfortable, companionable. The final straw? Mando slept in your presence. The first time it happened had been entirely accidental. He was exhausted after a strenuous bounty, one that ran far longer than they fought for, and the second the coordinates had been set, Mando collapsed into the pilot’s seat and promptly passed out. Knowing that he was comfortable enough to fall asleep without second thought, that he trusted you enough to be vulnerable like that around you...you never felt more like you belonged.

And Mando? When he woke several hours later, feeling far more well-rested than usual, he saw you curled up in the seat next to him with the child cradled in your lap as the blur of hyperspace reflected in your eyes. You had smiled at him, sleepy but bright nonetheless, and he had never been more grateful for the helmet that hid his face. You were too smart, too observant - you would be able to read the love on his face plain as day.

That little green womp rat and his beskar covered father saved you when you thought there was nothing left. The idea of losing that made you nauseous. The idea of how complete your little family would feel if you gave in made you tempted. 

It was complicated. 

A modulated grunt of frustration came from the man behind you as he couldn’t get a solid hold on that damn adjuster and you bit back a laugh. A Mandalorian, a warrior - bested by some plastic and fabric. Something fell to the ground, landed on the metal floor with two quiet thwaps, and before you could glance down to see what it was, warm bare fingers slid between the strap and your skin. This time there’s no stopping the almost violent shiver that racked your body, paired with an embarrassingly sharp exhale, and Maker your resolve was crumbling to pieces. 

“Tell me when.” Mando rumbled once his nimble fingers finally wrapped around the plastic, his modulator vibrating right in your ear in the most delicious way. The strap tightened slowly as his fingers slid up, the cup of the bra finally flush against your skin, and your voice was hoarse when you whispered ‘when’. 

Instead of simply reaching for the other strap, his warm palm made a lazy path across your skin, pausing for a breath between your shoulder blades before slipping under the thin fabric. He repeats the movement, tightening the strap until you clear your throat and manage to say in a stronger tone, “T-there is fine.” 

Mando hummed, his fingertips gliding over the soft skin of your shoulder and holy hell, his chest was practically pressed to your back and there was no way he wasn’t being a giant tease. “Just fine?”

“Perfect,” You corrected, your voice breathy, eyes threatening to flutter shut as that hand trailed over your shoulder to trace along the line of the cup of your bra. Goosebumps followed Mando’s touch, raised as your body’s desperate testament to the need that had vibrated through you. You just barely caught a glimpse of those tanned hands, hands you had seen a few times as he took care of the more delicate aspects of cleaning of his weapons, and you whispered, “You’re p-perfect.”

Mando gripped your hip suddenly, your soft flesh soft a beautiful contrast to his calloused hands, and it was the dip of his fingertips underneath the hem of your shorts that made you lean back into him fully, your head tilted back against his shoulder. A rumbled moan vibrated from his chest and into your back, felt all the way through his chestplate, as you “You want this, sweet girl?”

You nodded quickly. “H-how? How can we…”

“Leave it to me,” Mando murmured, preoccupied with the heat of your bare skin under his hands as he finally broke, finally explored the body of the woman he had fallen in love with in the months since his clan had expanded to three. “Just...tell me you want this. Please.”

Mando’s voice was rough and desperate even through the modulator and you nodded without a second thought. You knew you were in for it just from the way he pushed you further into your bunk to let the door slide shut behind him. No fanfare, no fuss. Mando was certain. He was going for what he wanted, and it lit a fire in you. 

You sat on the edge of the bed, your heart racing as Mando methodically unclasped his armor, his visor trained on you with each piece that came off - and it hit you. This was actually happening. 

Finally. 

You grinned up at the t-shaped visor of his helmet and pulled him closer by the hem of his duraweave pants, his grunt of approval stoking the flames of your need. He pulled his shirt off fluidly and your hands froze where they were trying to undo his pants as you admired the sight of so much bare skin. 

“So handsome,” You whispered before kissing just below his navel, smiling into his skin at the way his hand buried in your hair. Mando hummed under your gentle touch, under the trail of your tongue against his skin. It had been so long, too long since he had any form of gentle touch, you knew that. Touch starved, that was the term. 

You would fix that. 

You trailed your hand over his ribs, fingertips leaving goosebumps in their wake when your nails scratched him lightly. Finally having your hands on him had you almost giddy, your heart flying in your chest as you slowly kissed down his stomach to the tent in his pants, nerves and need warring in your belly. You wanted to learn every piece of your Mandalorian - his scars and their stories, where to kiss when you wanted to hear those intoxicating groans, his favorite places for you to bite and dig your nails into. You wanted to break him in the best possible way, destroy that headstrong restraint and discipline so he could destroy you in return. 

All it took was a teasing press of your tongue against the outline of his cock to make him snatch you up off of the bed with a firm hand at your jaw and you couldn’t help but smile. His helmet tilted slightly as he took you in, grinning at him like the cat that got the canary, eyes sparkling with excitement, and he gripped your shorts with his other hand hard enough to pop the hem. 

“Off.” Mando rumbled and you immediately shimmied out of them as quickly as you could with his hand still holding your face firmly. The second the fabric no longer hindered his access, he ran his hand over your ass, greedy fingers digging into the firm flesh of one cheek. “Such a good listener. Aren’t you, sweet girl?”

You pressed closer as you nodded, desperate to feel his body against yours, and your eyes fell closed at the warmth of the skin to skin contact of your chest against his. As much as you loved the bra you wore, you wanted to feel nothing between you. It was easy to slip off and Mando’s hand instantly left your jaw to trace along your breast. It amazed you how gentle he could be; those big hands capable of incapacitating, capable of killing, gently palming your skin and tweaking your nipple. A breathy chuckle met your ears and only then did you realize you were arching up into his touch. 

“I won’t be gentle.” Mando warned. 

You grinned, heat shuddering down your spine at the roughness of his tone. “Who says I want you to be?”

You were on your back before you could even blink, the impact against the bed pulling a gasp from you. Mando made an image painted by the gods: stood over you, chest heaving with each harsh breath, cock straining proudly against his pants. That was the last thing you saw before his hand slapped against the light control on the wall and the entire bunk plunged into darkness. 

A hand wrapped around your ankle and yanked you against a pair of firm thighs, forcing out a yelp that morphed into a low whine when your legs were spread wide. Without your vision to guide you, you had to rely on your hearing, your sense of touch, and the low clank of metal on metal and rustling of fabric had you confused until his warm, entirely naked body slid over yours and you heard the first tones of Mando’s voice - unmodulated, raw and low in your ear. 

“You need me, huh? You need this?” Mando growled, sliding down to grind his cock against you, and he grinned impishly at the desperation of your whimper, at the way you angled your hips to try to slide him inside of you. “Let me take what I want and I’ll give you what you need.” 

You could have cried out when he pulled back, could have begged him to stay and fuck you already, but the feeling of his lips latching onto your neck made your voice melt into unintelligible groans. You buried your hands in his hair, memorizing the soft way the curls fell through your fingers. The combination of his teeth and tongue were sure to leave a mark, one you would wear with pride for anyone to see. It was the first of many lovebites he left on your skin, trailed down your neck and over your chest and delivered between significantly gentler bites and licks to your breasts. Your hips moved entirely of their own volition, legs wrapped around his waist to rub against his stomach. 

Mando’s hands found your hips and pressed them down, pressing you flush to the bed hard enough that you knew you would have bruises, ones you would relish as long as they lasted. You had never felt more desperate to be touched, tension rocketing tighter and tighter in your core. 

“So needy, mesh’la.” Mando rumbled as he shoved you further up the bed. He delivered a sharp bite to your thigh and you jumped, a laugh bubbling up from your chest at the suddenness and the way he eased the mark with his tongue. You carded your fingers through his hair again and his chest rumbled, almost as if he were purring. Just as you were about to comment on it, tell him how cute it was that he reacted so beautifully to your touch, his tongue slid through your wet heat. 

“Fuck!” You exclaimed, the grip you had in his curls tightening harshly as you tried to roll your hips to grind against his face, but he pinned your hips with sure hands. Not to be hindered, you pressed your heels into his back and still managed tiny hitches and Mando chuckled at your determination. His tongue rolled over your clit, over and over until you were crying out at the sparks of pleasure radiating through your core.

His mouth left you for a split second, just long enough to slick his fingers with his spit, and his tongue descended back to your clit as two fingers rubbed tiny circles against your entrance. You were almost incoherent in your begging, your voice slurred, words cut off in the middle - and then two thick fingers slid into your cunt, his lips wrapped around your clit, and you thought your heart stopped with the intensity of it all. 

After what could have been an eternity or a mere half second, Mando pumped his fingers slowly and your entire world imploded around you. The groan that left your lover was exhilarating. He mumbled against you, something about the tightest fucking cunt he’s ever had, before his tongue went back to town, flicking over your clit as his fingers curled into that sweet spot deep inside you. Your back arched of its own volition, your entire body tensing as Mando rocketed you to your climax.

“Can’t wait anymore.” Was the only warning you got before he pulled away, leaving you to flutter around nothing, and a high whine left your throat as Mando leaned over you and yanked your thighs up to hook further over his hips. His lips fell to yours and you groaned at the taste of your arousal, your hand cupping his jaw and reveling in the scratch of his stubble against your skin. The heavy weight of his cock pressed against your thigh until he angled himself to press right against your entrance, and - 

“Wait!” You gasped and Mando froze entirely. You reached between you to grasp his cock, groaning at the thick girth that you knew would split you open beautifully. “Let me... let me make you feel good, too.” 

“Won’t last, mesh’la,” Mando growled, his forehead pressed to yours as he fucked into your hand despite his words. For just a moment you thought you had him, had gained some modicum of control as you stroked him with a firm hand, but he batted your hand away to pin above your head. “Need to bury my cock in your tight little cunt.”

“P-please! I need it, I need you to fuck me full.” You mewled so prettily for him and Mando broke. 

The sound that left him was pulled from his very core, an almost feral growl radiating from his chest and leaving you shuddering underneath him, ready to beg until he finally shoved his cock into you, but before you could get a sound out you were flipped you onto all fours. You tried to steady yourself, to press your weight into your hands so you could grind your ass back against him, but a rough hand shoved between your shoulder blades until your face and chest were flush against the blankets beneath you. 

“You want me to claim this cunt?” Mando breathed into your ear as he settled his chest against your back, gliding the head of his cock through your slit teasingly. A dark chuckle followed your pitiful whine. “Oh I think I will. Stuff you full of my cum so everyone knows who you belong to.”

Mando pulled back and steadied a hand at your hip, the other pulling your cheeks apart as he finally slid home. Inch after devastating inch filled your cunt, the familiar stretch on just the right side of painful. A sinful, wrecked groan came from behind you and despite yourself, despite being face down ass up for a warrior, you felt powerful. 

“S-so fucking tight,” Mando stuttered out as he gave a small push forward, pressing even further into your heat despite being buried to the hilt already, short, aborted thrusts as he tried to let you adjust to his girth. 

“Please, please, please,” You huffed out with each exhale, and if you were in your right mind you might have been at least slightly embarrassed by the desperation of your begging, but you were aching for him to move. You clenched around him, reveling in the punched-out sound it drew from him, and finally, finally he drew back halfway to shove back into you sharply. 

Mando didn’t fuck you - the word ‘fuck’ wasn’t enought to encompass the way he drove into you over and over, shoved you further into the sheets with his teeth buried in your shoulder. You wanted to be destroyed, and Maker did he deliver, pressed against that sweet spot deep inside you and making your writhe beneath him. It took a moment to find your voice amongst the harsh thrusts, but the sound of you whimpering ‘Mando…’ over and over had your lover delivering a sharp swat to your ass before yanking you up by your hair and bracing your ass on his thighs, his pace unfaltering. 

“S-such a sweet little thing,” Mando stuttered, one hand holding you by your neck, keeping you flush against him, and the other sliding down to toy with your clit, those calloused fingers rubbing in tight circles until you pressed your head to his shoulder and wailed. “Sound so pretty for me.”

You wanted to tell him how good he felt stretching you out, how much you loved this, how much you loved him, but there was no speaking when his thrusts punched the very air from your lungs. So you buried your hand in his hair and tightened, rolling your hips into every push of his own. The sharp pull of his hair seemed to egg him on and his hand slid up from your throat to tilt your head and capture your lips with his. 

The angle was awkward, the kiss all teeth and tongue, and you wouldn’t trade it for anything. Mando drank in your every moan, every whine, and sang out his own in response, poured them out in a never ending stream that left you washed out in pleasure and pride. You reduced him to this. The tight clench of your cunt around him left the strong warrior slashed down to his most base instincts, left him to bury himself in you over and over as if he couldn’t bear to hold back. 

Your begging was almost incoherent, words broken off halfway with each harsh thrust, but it all melted into one low cry when Mando toyed with your clit and ground against that sweet spot against you and you broke. The only thing that kept you upright was Mando’s strong grip on your body as your pleasure crested, sparked out all across your body and left you weak in the aftermath of ecstasy. Your hand fell loose in his hair, still tangled in his curls but just barely staying put. 

Mando laid you down almost sweetly, flipped your weak body around to lie on your back and settled between your thighs. He growled low in your ear when you hooked your ankles over his lower back and whined so prettily for him as he pushed himself deep into your cunt - right where he belonged. His thrusts were shorter, stunted in his relentless chase for release inside of your body, leaving you hanging in the precipice between pleasure and overstimulation. 

“Feel so good,” You whispered in his ear, gasping when he buried his face in your neck and latched onto your skin with rough presses of teeth and tongue. The pace of his thrusts stuttered when you clenched around him, urging him to let go.

“Where?” Mando grunted low into your skin, unable to find the words to finish his thoughts but you knew. You knew what he wanted, the desperate want you both shared.

“Inside!” You gasped out in a rough voice, almost desperate in tone, and locked your legs around his waist tighter, using the newfound leverage to meet each of his thrusts. “Please, please cum inside me.”

The choked off sound in your ear was downright addictive and paired with the airtight grip on your hips as he pressed flush against your body and flooded you with his release....well, you wouldn’t be able to live without it, without him. Mando collapsed, crushed you underneath his weight with his cock still nestled in your tight heat. Maker, he was heavy but you never felt safer. He panted in your ear, the ghost of each breath curling across your skin like a loving caress and you could feel the curve of his lips where he smiled against you, a smile you matched. 

Your fingers buried in his hair once more, scratching against his scalp in slow, gentle circles, and the delighted whimper he gave sounded like it came from anyone but the rough and tumble warrior who just railed you into oblivion. One of his hands writhed up between your chests to cup your breast, the gun-calloused skin of his palm a harsh contrast to the soft, unmarred skin of your chest. 

“Mando…” You chuckled in a tone of warning when those fingers tweaked your nipple, sending sparks echoing across your skin. 

“Din,” He grunted in your ear before taking the lobe between his teeth and worrying it with his tongue, only pulling back when you made a small noise of confusion. “Din Djarin. You should know the name of the man who claims you.”

Your heart stuttered, racing to match the pace of your thoughts. This...this was a huge deal for him, you knew that. Your arms tightened around him almost of their own volition as it hit you - this union meant as much to him as it did to you. 

Mando - Din was yours. 

You were his. 

“Cyare,” Din whispered at the small noise that left you, propping himself up on his elbows to hover over you despite not being able to see you. You followed his movements as best you could, not wanting to jostle around enough for his softening cock to slip from your body.  “Are you okay? Was...Was this not-”

“No! No, I...damn it,” You stumbled over your words in your rush to reassure him, reaching up to hesitantly place your hands on either side of his face, giving him plenty of time to stop you in case you crossed a line. He didn’t. Rough stubble met your fingers and you laughed wetly in disbelief. You couldn’t believe your luck. “I love you. I have from the start.”

Din’s breath caught in his throat and he pressed his face back into your neck as he returned the sentiment, his words muffled and cracking under the weight they carried. You giggled at the way his tongue met your neck, surely adding to the multitude of marks he already left there, but tilted your head back for more access nonetheless. He was right - he laid his claim on you, buried his seed as deep inside you as he could and left the imprint of his teeth across your skin for all to see. 

“A clan of three, right?” You said before kissing his temple, yours eyes slipping closed as your exhausted reared. 

“Yes, sweet girl. A clan of three.” Din rumbled. The vibration of his chest only lulled you further into slumber and the last thing you heard before the sleep overtook you was Din whispering, almost to himself, “My own little aliit.”

[randomblog178]

“will you cover me?”

yoongi has a migraine at the airport and the crowding fans/flashing lights make him nauseous

warnings: migraine, nausea, emeto

Yoongi doesn’t know how to react when he sees the crowded area at the airport just a few distances away from him, he can hear the sea of fans screaming his name. He has a throbbing headache and certainly all of the flashing lights, the noise, and the fans invading his personal space were not helping. “Will you cover me?” Yoongi asked his older member Seokjin. “Of course I can”. Seokjin knew of Yoongi’s migraines. He’s been having them ever since he was a trainee, and they can get pretty intense when he’s overwhelmed or around many people at once. It was no surprise that he was anxious to walk past this ocean of people. “Just stay close to us, hyung” Jimin reassured him. As Yoongi walked through the crowd, he felt the migraine get worse, which is what he expected. Not only that, but he began to feel nauseous. He got sweaty, and his stomach was beginning to feel like a volcano about to erupt at any given time. When a fan clung onto his arm, that was his breaking point. He stumbled back and Seokjin caught his arm just in time “woah, are you doing okay?” Seokjin asked, now extremely worried for him. “‘m dizzy..” Seokjin handed him a bottle of water and rubbed circles over his back. “Lets just please hurry up and get out of here” Yoongi said, this time with tears in his eyes and trembling breath. Jin nodded and put his arm around his shoulders while leading him to the exit of the building and into the car. “Oh Yoon...” Jin cooed as he rubbed his belly “N-No pressure please...I just need to breathe for a bit..” He said as he held his stomach with both hands. Taehyung opened a window for fresh air because somebody clearly needed it right now. “Okay, let me know if you feel worse” Jin added. Yoongi nodded and squirmed a bit in his car seat as he rubbed his rumbling belly. Not long into the car ride, Yoongi felt the familiar quease lingering in his stomach once again. “quick get a bag...i’m gonna be sick” Jungkook immediately shifted through the back to find a black plastic bag full of junk. He quickly emptied it out and handed it to his hyung. “take it easy, Yoon. Do you want me to slow down the car?” Seokjin asked. Before Yoongi had time to respond, his head fell downwards and all of todays meals came right back up in not one but two huge waves, splashing into the plastic bag. “That didn’t sound very good...” Namjoon said, worried for his member. “I’m fine Joon...I feel a bit—“ He was cut off as he felt more liquid came back up, this time in waves of 3. “Feel better?” Jungkook said sympathetically as he rubbed his hand up and down his hyungs back. “Yes..thank you guys” Yoongi spoke softly as he was a bit shy when it came to stuff like this. “of course Yoon, let us help you whenever you feel this way”.

AHH THIS IS MY FIRST FIC EVER AHHDJSSN and hopefully I can get even better...I also hope this isn’t too short😭I did mention that I preferred snz over emote/nausea and thats just bc i barely ever had experience writing emote/nausea, so i wanted to test myself with this LMFAO and the title is weird i could not come up with anything

[inthepercolator]

I think Harry is a very calm very mellow guy but he’s also super anxious,, he’s just good at repressing things like homosexuality and fears that almost render him nauseous at the mere thought of them-

Being the youngest kid with an older brother and father that everyone expects you to be like can be a real pain when u are in fact, nothing like either. So you have to hide every part of yourself that isn’t ‘manly’ enough - whatever that means - and power through things that upset you. Then when ur alone you can feel all those emotions at once and get them out of the way so you don’t get dragged for being yourself. It’s so bad in fact that even after your family moves away this behaviour is still present and you keep doing it for years and years just hoping that if you bottle it up enough maybe it will go away and no one will notice.

But then you meet someone who does notice. He notices bc he’s genuinely invested in your thoughts, opinions and wellbeing. And it’s not just a shallow investment done out of casual politeness it’s a deep compassion that makes you feel like someone understands you for the first time in your entire life. The feeling that he cares about you because you are worth caring about. And he jumps at the opportunity to help you and teach you meditative and other mindfulness techniques because he doesn’t want you to be stressed, even if you protest that he has more important things to worry about he doesn’t give up on you and stays by your side the entire time

..Anyway what was I saying