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#i fuck w her as much as she fucks with me and i feel like i need to scream it to the world that i finally found someone that sees me
daydreamerwoah · 10 hours
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Love Through It All Pt. 12
tw: mentions of cheating, mentions of divorce; hurt; angst; anger; rollercoaster of emotion; sadness; arguing; crying; depression; mentions of therapy/counseling; brief mention of sexual content; kidnapping
Please read Part 1 for my author notes for the beginning of this story if this is your first time here.
Eventually, your eyes fluttered open, looking down at your lap. Your head was swimming and hurting equally, and you felt like you had been hit by a car or something. When you raised your head up, the feeling only intensified, making you groan a little. Glancing around, you could make out that you were in a medium-sized room that had a table, a few chairs, a small TV on the wall, and a door that stood out in front of you.
You were about to stand up, but the moment you tried moving your arms and legs, you realized you were tied to a chair with ropes wrapped around your ankles and the legs of it, while your hands were tied behind you and the back of the chair.
What the-?
Suddenly, the flash memory of almost reaching your apartment but feeling arms grab you tightly rushed through your mind at all once. You remembered being thrown into a vehicle, something sharp touching you, but that was it. What happened after that?
You tried wiggling your body against the restraints, but they were so tight you knew it would probably leave bruises. Panic began to set in as you hastily looked around the room once more for something.. anything to help you.
"Easy there," a voice said behind you.
Your body tensed, scared to even turn your head to look back or respond to the voice. But it didn't matter. Heavy boots slowly made their way around your sitting figure before standing right in front of you. The moment your eyes glanced up, you wanted to pass out again.
No.
"W-what is...this?" you asked, voice dry.
Jax, standing in front of you with an excited, menacing expression on his face, chuckled, "This?.. Well, I can't give all my secrets out. That'll ruin the fun... You know you're weaker than I thought," he smirked.
Your eyebrows furrowed, making him chuckle once more at you before walking around you in a circle like a lion ready to attack its prey.
You tried not to sound scared, but how could you? "What do you want?"
Walking over to the table and leaning over it, he placed his arms on the table, eyeing you up and down, "There's the question I was looking for," he exclaimed, "You pick up quick Mrs. Riley." The way he said your last name had your heart dropping to your stomach before your mind could even register it. "This is where you help me out." He paused, walking back over to stand in front of you again, "I want you to call your husband. Tell him to come here-"
"No," you cut him, "I'm not doing that. Whatever the fuck you have against him- if you're so mad, why won't you talk to somebody about it." You tried wiggling out of the ropes again.
A wicked snicker escaped his lips, "Oh darlin'... it was never about just me having something against him. He has to pay for what he did to us."
Confusion ran across your face, "You mean Williams?"
That got a barked laugh from him that echoed throughout the room, making you try to free yourself once more. You didn't like the way he thought it was funny you asked that question.
"You think this is about her?" It was like he couldn't stop laughing, "It was never about that slut who wanted to shag every man that even looked her way.... although she was amusing. But she was not very helpful."
Utterly confused. That's what you were. The first time Jax even approached you, he got in your face, upset about Simon. Upset that Simon was the one who sent that girl away. Now he spoke as if none of that mattered, and you only continued to wiggle your body so much you were about to cry.
"Let me go!" you yelled.
He clicked his tongue a couple of times, "You know that's not how this works, right?" He teased.
"Please... just let me go!"
"Call your husband." He demaned
Now you were getting mad and desperate, "Fuck you! I'm not helping you!"
"Yeah?... Not even to say goodbye?" Your eyes widened, making that stupid smirk form on his face again, "You see... I didn't want it to come to this. But you really left me no choice... you should have left Ghost the day I talked to you. Would've been easier for all of us... especially the boss man."
He walked to the door, banging on it with his fist before coming back to stand in front of you. The door opened, and another set up of footsteps was heard walking into the room, but you couldn't see who it was since Jax's body was blocking your view at first. But when they finally approached you saw who it was, and you felt the bile in your stomach run up to your throat.
"Hm... you look even better scared than you did the other night," he said a very small smirk on his face before he frowned.
"Mrs. Riley... I'm sure you've met my friend, Andrei, here. I know you two," he eyed you up and down in disgust, "got very close a few nights ago."
You wanted to fucking lurch out of the chair. You were breathing so quick it felt like you were almost hyperventilating as you looked back at the blue eyes of the man you let go down on you not even three nights ago. You hated the memories that swam through your mind of drinking at the bar with him and going to his room.
Andrei leaned against the table with his arms crossed and a neutral - almost bored - expression on his face as he looked at you. Completely opposite of how he did when he sat down at the bar next to you.
"Now," Jax said, making you look at him, "We can make it hard for you..." he said as he pulled a pistol out from behind his shirt, "or you can call your husband."
Was he really going to shoot you? Probably. You didn't know. But the way that both of the men looked at you most certainly told you they had no problem doing it. You thought Jax was this young soldier who was jealous of Simon; jealous of his rank or something... But something deep down told you it was more than that... and you had only two choices: Sacrifice yourself so nothing would happen to your husband, or call him.
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It had been weeks since Simon went to the gym. His usual 4-days a week routine had been reduced to nothing the night after he left you in the apartment. And now his body was paying for it as he did bench presses.
A little over a month had passed since he saw you or even talked to you. The first week when you didn't show up for the counseling session with him, he almost wanted to break the damn couch in the chaplain's office. But he knew it was no use... Lt Jones reminded him that what he did had consequences. And since you had decided to stop showing up for therapy, Simon used that time to meet with the chaplain twice a week. He talked about everything that happened, everything he thought about, and everything that he wanted to do to make it right in the future with you..... if you even decided to take him back.
Though he was worried, he also was on the verge of wanting to do anything to make you happy. If that meant getting the divorce papers, then he would. He even started planning on how he would make sure to go off the grid so you wouldn't fear running into him ever again if you said you wanted the divorce.
The only people he talked to that entire time were Kyle, Price, and Johnny.
Johnny - being the best bud ever - let Simon stay at his place and sleep on the couch. Most nights, they stayed up just watching football and drinking beers, but other nights, Johnny listened to Simon talk about his feelings... even if it were just a couple of words he said. He had never seen his lieutenant look so... defeated, crushed, and depressed. The usual stoic demeanor changed to that of a man who was ready to jump off a cliff. And couldn't help it... he was honestly worried about his friend.
Price and Kyle were worried as well. The Captain almost ordering for the man to take a leave until things were resolved between you two.
"Still here L.T.?" Johnny asked Simon as he walked up to the man who had just finished his bench presses.
Simon hummed, leaning down to grab his water bottle and taking a sip, "Need somethin' Johnny?"
He shrugged, "Thought we could all go to the pub right off base. Catch a match tonight? You need to get out the apartment mate," He asked. He was being cautious... Simon hadn't really gone out anywhere the last month except to work.
A nervous feeling set in his stomach. The last time he went out was to look for you at the club. He couldn't help but be a little anxious at the thought of running into you somewhere. But maybe that would be a good thing... he could at least see if you were alright if he even saw you. So he agreed... reluctantly so, before heading back to Johnny's place to take a shower and put on more comfortable clothes while the rest of the group headed to the pub.
After he laced up his second boot, his phone rang in his jacket pocket. When he pulled it out, his heart skipped about three beats as he saw your name light up on his screen.
Were you calling to tell him to come home? Or that you were wanting the divorce papers? He swallowed the lump in his throat as his answered the call.
"Hey," he said. God even just the thought of hearing your voice had him in shambles.
"H-hi... uh how are you?" you asked, seeming just as nervous.
He let out a breath he hadn't even realized he was holding in, "Good. You?"
"I'm... good," you paused for a moment, "I-I wanted to know if we could talk."
The tone in your voice made him internally shiver. You didn't sound happy or even sound like you were thinking as hopeful as he was.
"Course." He said as he waited for you to continue.
It felt like minutes had passed before you spoke again, but he was just eager. He wanted to hear your voice again. Hell, he wanted to pull you into a hug, get down on his knees and beg you to forgive him.
"Uh, I thought about this song today. It reminded me of you," you softly said, making Simon's world completely stop.
Time and everything else stood still.. So still that he thought his heart stopped beating completely.
When you first started dating, Simon always made sure you knew that if anything were to ever happen to you, that was the sentence you would tell him. It would let him know that if you were ever around someone and couldn't yell out that you needed help, you would tell him that you thought about a song that reminded you of him.
He tried to keep calm, he really did. But so many thoughts were running through his mind. Had you been captured this whole time? Where were you? What had you needing to say that?
"Yeah?" he said, his voice calm even though his insides were shaking, "What song?" It never mattered what song you said. You knew to pick any song at random, and you did, making him hum.
Another long pause came from you, frightening him for a moment, "Can we meet somewhere?" you sniffed, something he immediately noticed, "Maybe talk in person?"
The trained soldier that he was, your husband picked up on why you asked to meet him. He had conducted plenty of trainings in his career, one being hostage situations. And the thought of knowing you were being held as one almost sent him through the fucking roof. Still, he sounded as if he was unemotional about all of this; that it was just another conversation with you.
"Where?"
As you told him the place where to meet you, Simon wrote down the address and description of it before you said bye to him over the phone. He didn't even wait as he sent the information over to Johnny in a text message. He didn't even know if the sergeant would see it in time, as he knew they probably were already drinking and enjoying the football match. But he didn't care. His main priority was you, and he rushed out of the apartment with the only thought in his mind.
Okay... how are we liking the twist with Jax in it? I know reader is going through it! I'm so glad you all are still reading and liking the story! Especially everyone who is ready to beat up Simon lol! I'm right there with you! But I appreciate you sticking around to still read and enjoy :)
Like, comment, send feedback <3
Taglist: @kalypsoox @fruitymoonbeams-blogz @kylies-love-letter @xrosegoldwolfx @linaaaaa654 @jessicab1991 @darkravenqueen98 @yazyazali @thychuvaluswife @chloeforde @cownini @ssc7514
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irasamu · 17 hours
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𓍯 LOVE IS THE PROFOUND SENSATION, I AM OF UNYIELDING PASSION ; a dazai osamu fic snippet.
summary. you came. he left. dazai left. the man you were dying to reunite with left without even glancing back at you and you might just go mad.
tw. breakdown (minor), mori and reader having a manipulative/abusive dynamic, reader showing signs of her fucked up mental health.
𓍯 . imagine having such bad luck that you miss the last chance ever to meet dazai by just five fucking minutes.
five minutes ago, he left.
five minutes later, you came.
after years of being away, you finally came and he isn't here because lo and behold-- that bastard left.
he left.
you just missed the last chance to reunite with him.
behind you stands chuuya who looks as betrayed by that man but chuuya doesn't get it. no one will.
no one will. no one will. no one will. no one will --
"hey, come on, don't dwell on that bastar --"
"it's impressive how he was able to escape. man, never thought anyone would be able to escape but it's a given since its him -- he did create most of the security arrangements here-- we need to get rid of it. every person he appointed too. all his ideas and plans --"
"... hey--" chuuya kisses his teeth as you do not listen, staring out of the ceiling length windows from mori's office as you go on and on.
"-- that kid akutagawa? i'll take him in. oh we can't get rid of him. he's too valuable. my room -- i need a new one-- i need to tell mori-sama i need a new room and my hair? i need a new hairstyle. also -- fuck." you curse as your shoulder blade cries out in pain, looking straight to see chuuya's arm pinned against your neck as he keeps you pinned against the wall and your shoulders slump. "right. we need to get rid of you as well."
chuuya's eyebrows rose as he stared right into your dazed eyes, hiding the panick and worry very well as he stares at you so coldly it makes you clench your jaw.
"he left. mori-sama sent me away and -- and because of that -- i-- why did he sent me away?" you look pitiful in chuuya's eyes, almost on the verge of a breakdown and over who? someone like dazai? oh lord...
yet why does he feel more sympathy than disgust or pity for you? why does he remember all those poems written by those lovesick poets?
"he won't die. you are underestimating that bastard." chuuya offers comfort, comfort which is mockery to you. it makes you see red because he does not get it.
"i am! because i didn't get time to go on many missions with him! i didn't know him like you did! i don't even know if he still likes sweets or not!" you scream out, a sob ripples out of your throat next as you shakily grab chuuya's jacket and cling to it as if it's your lifeline. "why did you guys sent me away!? i didn't even get to spend much time with him!" you cry.
because chuuya spent time with him to know this much about him. because everyone else except you got to see him everyday while you lived in memories of him. because you worked your ass off everyday in hopes of one day meeting him again and when that day came, he left.
"listen --" yet chuuya stops speaking, your neck feels a piercing pain spread through it before you close your eyes and fall limp in chuuya's arms, a syringe stuck on your neck which chuuya gently pulls out and looks behind to see elise -- more matured and grown as she sorrowfully stares at your unconscious form -- and mori who has a blank look on his face but chuuya knows better than to assume the boss isn't fazed because from his prodigy leaving and his assumed heir breaking down, mori's original plans crumbled. and even as chuuya stares at mori now, he knows the older man is making new tactics and strategies, adapting to this surprising new situation.
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you didn't have time to register the pain in your throat, the throbbing in your head, the burning behind your eyes or the emptiness clawing at your heart as you stare directly at the man. his stare is blank but it makes you uncertain about yourself. his stare is the kind which makes you unconscious and makes you feel as if you don't fit in your skin.
"you must be exhausted from your journey... and then suddenly learning of dazai leaving... i assume it was a lot for you to take." he speaks so kindly and warmly. tears gather in your eyes again.
mori gets up from his place on a stool next to your bed, he approaches you and places a hand against your forehead to check if you have a fever or not.
"but that's disappointing." mori clicks his tongue as he leans down to whisper against your ear, his scarf brushing against your jaw as he does so, "you of all people should not be so easily affected. it's really disappointing. you failed me on the very hour you came back. should i send you away again or am i wasting my time on you? remember unless you have made a name for yourself -- which you haven't yet-- you are replaceable. and it won't take me more then five minutes to find eager candidates who'll be eager to take your place." and he leaves.
your eyes stay glued to his disappearing figure, heart thumping violently in your chest as you ponder over his words and somewhere along the way, the fear of being replaced is so real it's making your body shake as if you are in some kind of delirium. this is one hell of a welcome back.
you snicker. would you have worked just as hard if you knew you were never gonna meet dazai? would you really go shopping and buy all those items which reminded you of him?
you clasp your hand over your mouth before doubling over, cackling. it's all so pitiful that it's making you laugh. he hurt you in a way no one ever can. no. he made you mad. mad in love. a mad woman living in her delusions. and now suddenly reality is slapping you. the seductive amd tempting delusions leave. unless you meet them daily by indulging in alcohol.
maybe you are actually going mad because as you laugh, you imagine the warmth his cold fingers would provide if he were to hug you from behind right now, he would probably lay his cheek on your head, his fingers slowly dragging up your arms and towards your shoulders before he wraps it around your neck and kisses your head.
you might be going mad. actually. laying your head down on the soft pillows, you laugh at yourself. "fuck you. fuck you dazai osamu."
like a wanderer with no definite destination to go to, you feed your emptiness with worldly pleasure. till how long can you go on pretending as if dazai osamu isn't a religion you are the devoted follower of?
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[🍪] chocolate chip cookie, includes; a fic inspired by a song of your choice!
maybe frat!rafe or either dealer!rafe (👀) with friends by chase atlantic😁😁😁😁😁😁😁they’re at a party and all her friends are fucked up and yk HAKSJDKD
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₊˚⊹ᰔ 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬
pairing: dealer!rafe x fem!reader
summary: ❝all of your friends have been here for too long, they must be waiting for you to move on. girl, i’m not with it, i’m way too far gone.❞ — after confessing his feelings for you, rafe gets nervous and leaves you the following morning. now you two are at a party, and he isn’t leaving without you.
warnings: friends w benefits au, mentions of drinking and dealing of drugs, arguing, suggestive ending
word count: 0.7k
a/n: wrote this with s2 rafe in mind..
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you were the only sober one at this party. along with rafe, who never drank when he was dealing, and vowed to never get high on his own supply. you knew he’d be here— a party wasn’t a party if rafe wasn’t serving up people in the corner of the living room. you stared at him from a distance, his eyes occasionally finding yours when he looked up from the stacks of money on the table. you hated how good he looked tonight. skin flushed with a sheen of sweat from having so many people around him, his bangs hanging loosely in his face, with that blue jeans and white t-shirt combo that you loved so much.
you swallowed thickly, your trance being broken when one of your, very drunk, friends grabbed onto your arm for support. “stop looking at himmm!” she slurred, cackling when you rolled your eyes. “he just wants you for himself without any real commitment.” she nearly lost her footing, a yelp leaving her lips as you decided to guide her out of the kitchen. while your friend wasn’t all the way wrong, she didn’t know enough about you and rafe’s ‘situationship’ to form an opinion on it. your friends only knew what you told them, which meant they’ve only ever heard your annoyed rants.
“let’s get you over here..” you sat her down on the couch where the rest of your friends drunkenly talked amongst each other. rafe wasn’t far from where you sat, his laugh echoing in your ears as he started stuffing his black backpack full of cash. you could tell by the smile on his face that he had a good night for shop. sensing that you were looking at him, rafe felt the burn of your gaze as he got up, having no intention of leaving this party without you on his arm. you smelled his cologne before he approached you, the scent making your heart flutter in your chest.
“hey, can we talk?” rafe stopped in front of you, your friends turning around at the sound of his voice. you looked up at him, cursing under your breath at how handsome he was. “leave her alone, asshole!” rafe smiled at your friend, flipping her off before getting you up and taking you outside. “your friends are annoying as fuck.” he stopped by his truck, backing you up against the vehicle until his thigh sat comfortably between your legs. you knew what he was doing. “they’re drunk..” you glared at him, “what do you want?” rafe tilted his head at your words. “what do i want?” he repeated.
“you gonna act like you weren’t staring me down in there?” he laughed, cupping your chin. “you look pretty.” turning your head away from him, you shrugged him off as you arched a brow. “i was looking at you, and?” you ignored his little compliment. “..and you haven’t replied to any of my messages or called me back.. why?” you shook your head. “are you seriously asking me this? you tell me you have feelings for me while you’re inside of me, and then leave without a word in the morning? excuse me if i felt like you were toying with me or something.” you crossed your arms over your chest.
“i got nervous, alright! but i swear to you i meant every word. i would never mess with you like that..” he stepped closer. “i’ve been wanting this, us, for a long time, y/n. i’m not good at this stuff, but i want to try, i want to do it with you.” your gaze softened. “do you mean that?” your voice was small, a clear indication that you weren’t trying to argue with him anymore. “i fucking swear by it.” you watched as his jaw clenched. “i wont disappoint you, baby.” finally, for the first time in two weeks, he took you in his arms. you sighed, feeling a weight you didn’t know was there, lift off of your shoulders.
“is this a revenge dress?” you laughed when he pulled away, inspecting your outfit. “no, but it worked.” you teased. rafe leaned down and kissed you, in which you wasted no time in returning. “come on, let’s get out of here.. ‘before your friends threaten me.” you let him place you in the passenger seat, a squeal leaving your lips when he landed a harsh smack to your ass.
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sjywrites · 2 days
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Hii can I request Sophia x reader academic rivals? 🥺 u can do whatever u want w the plot pretty much please and thank u so much <3 :)
༊*·˚ ACADEMIC RIVALS LOVERS?
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𝓢ophia 𝓛aforteza x 𝓖n!reader. (no pronouns used). 𝓖enre. fluff, angst if you squint 𝓢ypnosis. our two favourite academic rivals have a lil fight, but the situation turns bad, and people realize their feelings. 𝓦𝓒 . 824 𝓒𝓦 . mentions of being hospitalised (sophia), a little angsty!
𝓝ote! this is a little messy since I wrote it during one of my breaks, but please lmk if you want like a part two cuz I really liked this plot!
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This is purely fiction and is not meant to interpret how the idols act in real life!
,, not proofread + english is not my first language ! ೃ⁀➷
At this point it didn’t even matter if you were better than everyone, you just had to be better than her. It started off very simple, both of you wanted to be better than everyone, academically that is. Eagerly waiting to get tests back and see who got a higher score, a smug grin on one's face when they got a better result than the other. No harm in that right? Wrong, that’s what started all of this.
Sophia walked towards me with her head held high, her uniform as neat as ever and her hair styled in a way making her look almost angelic. Wait, what? “What were your results?” She said, slamming her paper on top of my desk, I shook out of my daydreaming to answer her. “96.” I said while looking down in my maths book, trying to solve an equation but still focusing on what she would respond. She looks away and a teasing smirk spreads on her lips, and moves the finger that covered her results, 97. “Guess I’m just better than you huh?” She said proudly, staring down at me “Just because you got one point more than me doesn’t mean you’re better than me.” I said, pouting a little at her accusation.
Lately I’ve been feeling kind of… weird? Even if Sophia gets a higher score than me, I can’t find it in me to give a fuck. “Well, you’ve been slacking off a lot lately, I’ve gotten higher scores than you on the last four tests. So, I think that makes it obvious who's smarter!” Sophia states like it was the most obvious answer to what I said. Staring at her for a moment, I reply. “I've been busy okay, not everyone has that much free time to spend on studying, and you're talented in general, no wonder you get high scores” She looks shocked at my statement, then she smirks a little, “Did you just admit that I'm smart?” She looked proud in some way or another, “Not what I meant Sophia, but whatever floats your boat.” I grab my things from the desk and walk outside the classroom to my locker, a little frustrated at the whole situation. I did miss her response,
“I study that much so you won't think I'm stupid.”
A week goes by, no Sophia in sight. She missed two assignments, she's usually here every day. Even if she's sick, which I don't get why she does, but still. Did something happen to her? Was it something I did?
“You've been zoning out for the past like, three periods, what is going on with you today?” Lara, my best friend asks. “Do you know where Sophia is?” I ask, not really thinking before I ask. “Why do you want to know, don't you guys like, hate each other?” She looks at me with a very questionable look, suspecting something I cannot grasp, “Yes? No? I don't know Lara, but do you know where she is?” I say, a little confused and concerned. She looks at me with sad eyes before replying, “Y/N, Sophia got really sick out of nowhere, I heard she's at the hospital.” My eyes blew wide at the shocking news, why didn't she tell me? No, why would she do that? We're not even friends.
Am I really doing this? I think to myself as I open the hospital doors and stumble up to the kind-looking man in the lobby. I strike up a casual conversation with him as he guides me to a room, I thank him quickly before he scurries away.
There in the little window on the door I see her, Sophia's sitting down on the bed. Her hair is a mess and her clothes look ridiculous, it looks like she hasn't slept for a few days too. I gently open the door and her gaze falls upon me, it's easier to see her face now. She looks tired, really tired. “Hey…” I say, she looks away from me and cuddles up in her sitting position. “What are you doing here?” she tries to sound annoyed, but it just comes out in a tired huff. “I heard what happened, I… was worried about you. I brought some notes from the classes you missed.” She looks shocked at my confession, she relaxes her posture and her gaze becomes soft. “Thank you… I really appreciate it.” She smiles a little as she grabs the papers I handed her, our hands touching softly.
I look at her, really look at her. For the first time actually having time to admire how pretty she looks, how perfect her flaws are. “I just came to give you that… so if you don't need anything else, I'll go.” I turn around to walk away, grabbing the door knob and turning it around, “Wait! Will you… please stay with me a little longer, I need it.
I need you.”
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this is so messy I'm sorrrrryyyy!! I wanted to post something today at least :((
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toomuchracket · 2 days
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i know we've talked about jealous office nerd but what about girlie? like imagine they ran into his ex or a girl tried to flirt w him or smth
the girl who gets a trial week at the magazine before marianne decides if she wants to hire her - you're not particularly bothered initially when it transpires she's an art writer and thus will be in your and matty's department, but when she LATCHES onto your boyfriend and the questions go from "so is this word limit, like, set in stone? i just have so much to say" at the start of the week to "you know how i've written for frieze? well, i have an in at the team running the art fair, and i think you should come with me this weekend - they've given me a hotel suite we could stay in" at the end of the week... you can't even hear matty's reply from the desk across from yours because your rage is making the blood pump faster into your ears, and luke from film reviews just slides you a pack of cigs and whispers "i think you should maybe go and have one of these. you look murderous, mate" lmfao. but he doesn't have a light on him, so you actually do need to go up to matty and cut the girl off (while blatantly ignoring her) to say "matthew, i need to borrow your lighter" and respond "nope" when he offers to come for a cig too; you're not annoyed at him per se, other than the fact he hasn't told the girl he's with you (although tbf you don't tend to with new people for a minute, because you want to make the magazine seem strictly professional lmao), you just need to decompress alone. you do tell marianne what just happened, when you run into her on her way in, and she just rolls her eyes like "for fuck's sake. don't worry, her work's shit, we're not keeping her on. and don't worry about matty, either - he loves you, babe, and he's not about to throw that away for the frieze fucking art fair". she's right, of course - you don't know what he told the girl, but when you go back in matty moves to sit next to you and asks "can you take a look at this for me, please?", and on his laptop screen is a word doc saying "i love you. sorry about her. i didn't know how to nip her flirting in the bud without being a dick/ruining the professional relationship, and she took it too far. obv i'm not going with her to frieze (this year looks really shit anyway, would've taken you otherwise) and i told her the hotel room thing was inappropriate. and then i didn't hear any of what she said because i got distracted thinking about the inappropriate things we got up to in hotel rooms and also i booked a night away for us tonight so we can recreate them lol. but yes i love you so much xx". it's actually so cute, and you nod at him like "yeah. let me just..." and add a reply like "i love you too. just got a bit upset seeing her like that with you. but i'm sure you'll cheer me up at the hotel xo"; i mean, you do inadvertently end up edging him while you wank him off when you get there, just grumbling about the girl so much you stop moving ("'ohhhhh look at meeeee i've written for frieze ooh!!' i could fucking write for frieze if i wanted. she's not special" and matty's crying desperate to cum nodding like "you definitely could, baby, you're such a good writer FUCK please please just let me cum" lmfao), and while matty's fucking you you're giving it "nobody else feels as good as me, do they, baby? nobody else you wanna fuck, is that right? just me. you're mine, and i'm yours" and he's moaning into your mouth like "just you, only want you, only NEED you. love of my life". it turns a bit sweet at that point, honestly, murmured i love yous and kisses and all that, but it's still a dirty, dirty fuck that ends with cum in you and on you and matty practically passed out from how hard he went to prove you were the only one for him. kinda obsessed actually <3
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yuuuhiii · 6 hours
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yandere themes, knife usage, mdni
a/n: I need to stop watching Dexter (*´ー`*)
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He loved you so so much. His beautiful bestfriend. You were to good for people, definitely to good for this world. In his eyes, no one was ever perfect for your time.
Nobody deserved it.
Not even him.
But he’d tell himself he was an exception since he was your bestfriend.
You were always nice and gentle to everyone that had the luck of talking to you.
But he hated.
Really hated.
When some morons could think they could have even a chance to be with you. Couldn’t they see that was his spot?
He adored the way you’d reject them, he’d like for you to be more mean but you could never do no wrong. And for the people that could ever mistreat you.
He dealt with them himself.
In the dark of the night, letting you know he’d go get you both snacks and you nodded, a kiss to his warming cheek. He feels the remnants of your lips still on his skin, even when he’s on his way to someone’s house.
It was a guy, someone who thought he could touch what was his. He stops at the end of the street, the guy walking into view.
He knows his routine, where he lives, his name and the best part, how to get in. So before the guy can even make it to his house. He’s settling in, the lights are off and a shot of adrenaline shoots through him when he hears the door unlock.
The guy walks in, unbeknownst of his presence on the couch until he turns the light on. He gasps loudly, almost tripping over his kitchen chair. He turns around from his place on the couch.
“Remember me?” He grins, standing up.
“W-What—Get the fuck out of my house!” The guy yells.
He snickers. “I asked if you remembered me.” He walks over to him. He towers over the guy, a psychotic glint in his eyes it has the guy gulping.
“N-No.” He pouts, placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Let’s try to remember okay? You saw the most beautiful girl today? You had your hands all over her, making her uncomfortable right?”
The guy nods his head. “I-I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.” He laughs, squeezing the guys shoulder.
“It’s nothing like that. I’m just her bestfriend, I gotta protect her from guys like you.”
He forces the guy to sit down on his own chair. He walks over to the kitchen counter, grabbing a knife. The guy squeaks, shivering in his chair.
“She was really scared you know? It hurt me to see her like that. I never wanna see her scared. It also makes me upset because I feel like I’m not doing my job correctly. So that’s why I’m here. To finish it.” He pokes at the end of the knife.
“Y-You’re fucking crazy!”
The guy takes off in a sprint for the front door. Making your bestfriend sigh. He goes after him and the poor guy isn’t even able to open the door before he’s dragging him back from the collar of his shirt.
“Gosh you don’t have to make this hard you know.” He rubs at his forehead.
“I swear! I didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable! She’s just really pretty—” He nodded along as the guy rambled on, dragging the knife along the guys chest.
“I’ve heard this so many times. Why do you guys always try to justify your actions in the end.” He sucks at his teeth.
“You guys always end up the same either ways. Dead.”
The guys plea’s are white noise in his mind as he plunges the knife in him. It’s always in these moments he feels like something takes over and when he snaps out of it, the work is already done.
He spends some time cleaning up the body. His hands his clothes. Making it look like a murder scene. He curses at himself when he sees the missed calls from you. He dials your number and your pretty voice engulfs his ears.
“Hey, where’ve you been.” He could hear your pout across the line making him smile as he makes his way to his car.
“A lot of the convenience stores are closed so I had to go to one far from your house.” He lies through his teeth.
“Oh ok then.” You murmur and he smiles.
“I’ll be right there ok pretty?” You hum and he hangs up.
When he’s finally back with bags of snacks, you cheer.
“Finally! I missed you.” You say as you throw your arms around his neck. You go to kiss his cheek but spot something.
“Hey what is this?” You swipe your thumb over his cheek, it’s a red stain.
“Huh?” He peers down at your thumb and places the bags on the floor. He laughs and you glance at him confused.
“I might’ve had a little snack without you, it’s ketchup.” You whine and push at his chest but he picks you up, letting you squeal as he places you on your bed.
“It’s fine, I got you all your favorites ok.” He leans in, his breath fanning your lips. It makes you gasp and your eyes lid. He pecks the corner of your mouth, getting off of you and grabbing the bags.
You’re left there on your bed a flushing mess as he hums, sorting out the snacks. You chew at your lip and sit next to him.
“Hey I have a question.” He hums, still taking things out.
“H—How come you don’t kiss me?” He faces you but you’re messing with your hands.
“You’re always calling me names and treating me like your girlfriend. You even scare away guys when they come up to me. But we’re still best friends?” He hates how confused you look.
“C’mere.” He pats his lap and you move to straddle him.
“You want me to kiss you?” He tilts his head and you nod.
His lips are on yours and they’re wasting no time. They’re feverish around yours and if the tv wasn’t on you would’ve payed attention to how loud your guys lips smacked against each others. When he inserts his tongue into your mouth you let out a moan, tugging at his hair. He smiles and pulls away.
“You’ve been waiting for this huh?” You nod quickly.
“I was beginning to think you didn’t feel the same way.” You rest your face on his shoulder. He places kisses on your cheek and down to your neck.
“Oh baby, if only you knew how far I’d go for you.”
YUTA OKKOTSU, KAZUTORA HANEMIYA, HARUCHIYO SANZU, Armin Arlert, Vigilante Deku, Hirofumi Yoshida,
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© yuuuhiii 24 : don’t plagiarize, translate, or post my work on other platforms
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puppyeared · 24 days
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filipina miku!! my mom helped me with her outfit ^_^
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moe-broey · 9 months
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I've only read the first volume of Dungeon Meshi but I'm convinced Laios and Marcille are both autistic but two EXTREMELY different flavors of autism, so much so it enables autistic PVP (one sided, Laios is unaware, possibly due to the autism)
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welcometogrouchland · 7 months
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[ID: An animatic of Stephanie Brown as Robin set to Tears over Beers by modern baseball. The images are paired with the lyrics. Stephanie as spoiler staring longingly at Bruce, Tim and Cass on a rooftop is paired with "he needed more than me". A compilation of sketches of Steph as robin go with "im friendly and thoughtful and quite awfully pretty". Finally a redraw of Steph's firing as Robin is paired with "but he needed more than me". End ID]
been trying to finish a comic for. Weeks now (just been hitting a lot blocks) and quickly threw this together as a break from it! Do you guys ever think about Stephanie Brown…
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skrunksthatwunk · 2 months
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kinda thinking about how the women who serve as maternal figures/raise kids in yyh are never quite ready for it. genkai's an arguable exception, but like.. atsuko had yusuke at 15, shizuru's basically in charge of kazuma full time in her early 20s/late teens (depending on version) with very very absent parents, and even shiori is given a kid she wasn't expecting, in the form of an old, old demon rather than like. a regular, blank slate ass human baby. and although shiori seems to do quite well with kurama, kurama can never be honest with shiori about who he is, or much of what he's seen. if he was, it'd probably make things far more complicated and overwhelming. atsuko, no matter how much she cares for yusuke, Could Not Have Been and thus wasn't ready to have him at 15. her attempts to make the most of that situation have had middling success at best. shizuru has also been placed into a parental role. we don't really know how long she's been raising kuwabara, but that's.. probably still parentification anyway. she shouldn't have to do that, and she shouldn't have to do that so young. and i think some of her coarseness with kuwa is out of frustration with her own inexperience + inadequacy + uncertainty, his not cooperating, and their parents for putting this on her in the first place. the ones who know the full extent of their situation grow desperate and it squeaks out in unpleasant ways, and the one who seems unbothered by it is the only one who has no idea that she's in way over her head. and i mean. ok. gonna preface this by saying keiko is NOT yusuke's mom in any sense of the word. but she does take care of him in a way atsuko couldn't manage to. she's often looking after him and cleaning up after his messes and stuff. she takes him on as a responsibility, and that is, in a way, a caretaker role. not to say that it SHOULD be her responsibility, but it's how she ends up being.
and when the stress of trying to make someone take care of themselves or be kind or good or Whatever goes awry, again, the violence and arguing and distance and ugliness of caring for someone reveals itself.
and i wonder about that. for a series dedicated to physical fighting as a form of communication, what does it say that this extends to the complicated, quietly desperate situations of so many of the women/girls it depicts, whom our more central characters were shaped and raised by?
hell, even hiei touches on this, because hina loved hiei, but there was no way she was prepared for him, obviously, nor for the pain of losing him. rui (whom i also see as a sort of caretaker figure to hiei, inasmuch as either of them were caretakers) literally throws him off a cliff because she couldn't face down the village elders, and out of some mixture of care for hina and, likely, fear for her own survival. and the guilt and pain of that killed hina and deeply wounded rui.
it's like motherhood, this thing that's so often treated as sacred and beautiful, is a kind of stitched up, painful, eggshell-walking thing that hurts parent and child and it's just. oughh
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they will never free my girl nina from that atrocious hair
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aq2003 · 21 days
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omfg . radio play version of much ado with david as benedick from 2001
#this version of benedick is a lottttt more serious and restrained than the 2011 version#definitely due to the medium and bc it matches the energy of this version of beatrice way better#it's not david and catherine's insane comedic chemistry but it's still really good imo..#like it's obviously not as endlessly fucking funny as the 2011 version but it's still really solid#and i'm impressed with how they did the humor in a 100% audio format#and i actually really love this interpretation of benedick as more cynical and leaning into his Hater side#ironically david's benedick here generally comes off as older and more mature than his benedick 10 years later#'the prince's fool... hAhH???' is obviously extremely funny but also 'the prince's fool... [uppity hmph]' is Inspired#and his outraged 'oh!'s and gasps and sighs when he listens to don pedro/claudio/leonato talking abt beatrice being in love with him#also funnily enough i think benedick's whole monologue after this is SO good. if not better than the 2011 version#cuz it's more restrained you have benedick's haterism actively fighting and losing against his satisfaction and giddy laughter#and the bit where benedick challenges claudio is so ohhhghhgouhgghg#the way his voice deepens with 'and her death shall fall heavy on you' just FLOORS me it's fucking perfect#but also equally as fun are the line readings where they have evidently remained the same (or similar)#my dearrrrr ladyyyy disdaiiiiinnnn#and the 'she misused me past the endurance of a block' rant#and when he's bitching about claudio falling in love w hero#but the vibes are so different this feels like a whole separate guy and that's really cool#i'm not sure how much i would love this production overall if i wasn't as familiar w the play tho#much ado#essentially trying to say in the least embarrassing way possible that david tennant is now both my first and second favorite benedick
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theylovevenus · 2 months
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Everyones asleep time to post the toxic fwb situationship no one that follows me cares abt
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angelnumber27 · 3 months
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It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
#I fucking hate having bpd#while I’m at it I don’t understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you#I feel so stupid#I feel so stupid for believing all the lies#but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing they’re perfectly fine and to them you don’t exist#I’m still in such a state of grief and I don’t understand why time hasn’t healed#it honestly feels like it’s gotten worse w time#I just torture myself but I can’t help it my brain wants me dead#it’s so painful I feel so fucking stupid#being abandoned with no closure by someone who’s your entire world#for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I don’t even know how many and dony want to know) immediately#like that was the plan all along#he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I don’t even know if he still has her or if she’s still alive and I miss her every day#I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me#i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him#I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didn’t appreciate me#not wasted. it wasn’t wasted. we had some incredible times together#I’ll never be that beautiful again#and now idk what do so bc i can’t decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over#it’s all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all#he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and it’s so fucked up#nobody read this I���m so embarrassed and horribly broken#it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if I’ll ever recover#I deserved it but it still hurts my heart#I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me#there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other#but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me I’m just fucked#why lead someone on like that for years knowing you’re going to abandon them the second it’s convenient
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shoezuki · 9 months
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i still think bout the end of the jarilo-vi quests in hsr when bronya and seele decide to hide the fact cocolia was a monster and create propoganda about her nobly sacrificing herself to seal the stellaron. like i STILL fucking think bout that and just
i mean for one what the FUCK but also specifically in terms of gepard. its so so cruel
like w his character i feel his unwavering loyalty and 'dont question things' and how he stands by the rules no matter what is kinda a defense mechanism for him. like we got flashbacks of him going to cocolia to talk about how he watched his soldiers die and be consumed and twisted by the fragmentum. and his character stories you unlock as u level him up are just. so much. him internally questioning why cocolia lets the guards jus die in waves against the fragmentum. i mean like
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in another he is prodded by serval of if he would act against the supreme guardian if it would protect belobog and he reluctantly says yes. But he continued and Continues to think that cocolia had a reason. that she wasnt sending them to die and sacrificing guards to the stellaron.
I feel he holds onto the idea of cocolia being Good and Right because otherwise that would mean all that death was for nothing and that he was complicit in the wanton murder of the guards under his charge. and the fact that he isnt told the truth. that cocolia was in fact a monster. drives me INSANE. like he out of everyone in belobog deserves to know that countless people died for nothing. he needs th chance to fucking snap
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volfoss · 4 months
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i think honestly what irritates me about yoshidas work SO much is that people will tell you that banana fish is THE gay manga (ignoring the many things that came before it and were more groundbreaking, ie MW literally having on screen (or like. on panel but still.) gay sex in it and that came out like a decade before BF did) when there really isn't barely any gay rep outside of the pedophiles and the one time ash drops the f slur. like im sorry but somehow yasha, a work she wrote in 1996, has more gay rep in it but also has the same issues.
i truly do not get how people can enjoy banana fish with the rampant racism every 2 pages or the rampant sexual assault plotlines (on women and ash bc he is just... written like how yoshida writes women lmao) that are handled IMPOSSIBLY bad and sincerely i hoped yasha would be better because it had been like a decade or so between works. and then it proceeds to continue with the heres our blonde genius protagonist who everyone is weird as fuck to and will sexually harrass and everyone finds it a VERY funny joke to point out how feminine he is when theres barely any women in the work (if you exclude the ones that are being raped/killed/creepy to minors. which to be fair yasha has toned down the sa a LOT) and that its funny that hes kind of gay except not really!! and its just absurd to me how it just persists in all of her stuff because she is not an author that handles gay stuff well. like the scene in banana fish where ash is completely ok getting gang raped and did it solely to get into the hospital when its been SHOWN that he has a lot of trauma with that. and then right after his friend makes a joke at ash's expense about that. like sincerely and genuinely is this what we are hyping up as the old retro gay manga. go read some tezuka and stop reading shit that the most the main characters do is share a kiss in a nonromantic sense and is obsessed w making every gay person be evil!!
#twist rambles#sorry mw u will always be famous to me (horrible fucking manga to experience for like 50% of the time but also it rocksss and theres#about anything tw worthy in there but i wish more ppl did read it)#sorry im like. i like to read her stuff bc her art is interesting to me but oh my god it makes me so angryyyy#rape mention#ask to tag#like... you do not understand my one sided rivalry w her it is SO intense like... bf was one of the worst reading experiences ive ever had#my tzk gay recs are: black jack (protag literally has a transmasc ex bf) and mw (for aforementioned reasons but its like. genuinely bonkers#and honestly there r a lot of minor characters that r lgbt in his works and like. can we please read smth that doesnt suck 100% of the time#like idk god bf is so baffling to me bc theres NOTHING there other than like. the new horrors every chapter. and yasha seems to be reusing#some plot points so it double sucks. haunted by the one analysis showing how the two had similar themes and point 1 was literally child#exploitation like... man. god it sucks. like not that mw is perfect bc its not and its a media i have a lot of thoughts on but man. id take#that over bf anyday bc like... sincerely how is anyone looking past the horrors there!! the story is a jumbled mess and it rly doesnt have#much to sayyyy but whatever lol!! id love if the characters were in a better media id love if ash didnt end the story feeling positively#towards the man who groomed him but whateverrrr lol#this is super disorganized as a post but like. genuinely it is so infuriating bc some of the plot concepts in yasha have potential and then#she keeps doing this like!!
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