#i got the hang of their faces now so that first drawing I shall just ignore foreva! :D

[kyurochurro]

TNG character sketches!! been wanting to draw this crew for a hot sec so I got around to it at 3 am last nite… LOL

(also I haven’t started tng yet but hey I dedicate this to my DAD big tng fan first Trekkie I ever met SHOUTOUT TO YOU DAD 🗣️)

[sovereignjojoz]

How they’d react if their kid told them they have a boyfriend/girlfriend/crush.

Featuring: Rohan and Dio.

Warnings: readers position is ambiguous, fluff, crack.

Notes- Dio should’ve had a daughter too idc!!!! All kids are age 4. I had originally written others too but they got DELETED when I put it in my tumblr drafts, so I’ll rewrite them later.

Dio

“Hello father. Hi daddy!”

Dio glanced up from his book upon hearing Giorno and Baby Brando walking into the room. Giorno entered his peripheral vision first as baby Brando held his hand, skipping alongside him.

He closed his book and leaned back in his plush throne, “hello children,” He skimmed the room quickly, “where are your other brothers?”

Giorno shrugged in response to his latter question, “don’t know, I only walk home with her,” he gestured to baby Brando, “since she’s the youngest.”

He hummed.

“And school?”

“It was fine.” Giorno sighed, adjusting baby Brando’s school uniform collar as she smiled up at her coolest big brother, “oh and I’m going to Mista’s house in five minutes.”

Dio raised an eyebrow, “To do what? Why wasn’t I notified prior.”

Giorno clicked his tongue, his father was so nosey. “Just because. It’s not a big deal I go there every week anyway.” Giorno walked to the door, “anyway I’m leaving now, bye.”

Dio scoffed, pre-teens were so sassy, he wished all his kids could just stay at the age where they were cute and docile.

Baby Brando jumped on the couch, shoes still on, and opened the window, hanging out so she could see Giorno.

“Bye Giogio! Love you!”

Baby Brando’s eyes widened as dio lifted her up and placed her on his shoulder.

He held her securely by placing his hand on her back, “Don’t do that.”

Baby Brando smiled toothily at him, “Okay daddy!”

Dio brought her forward, hanging her upside down by her legs, “why are you so happy today stinks?” He eyed her suspicions.

Baby Brando giggled from the weird motion, squirming, causing a heart shaped chocolate to fall out of her school dress pocket.

“Because someone gave me a chocolate today in school!”

Dio’s face contorted into disgusted. What vile vermin was giving confession candy to his daughter? As if he (or her brothers for that matter) would ever allow them near her.

Dio put her down, causing her to look up at him adoringly. “Who?”

“Umm! I dunno his name! Think it started with a j but he said he really really really really loves me and I was like huh really!” She slapped her hands on her cheeks, re-enacting the scene for her father, making sure to capture the full dramatic effect of what happened.

His frown deepened, “Really?”

“Uh huh!”

Dio bent down to his daughter’s eye-level, partially smirking “shall I eat him?” He said with a guise of seriousness.

Baby Brando couldn’t believe he just said that! She covered her mouth with her hands and gasped, “daddy no! That’s bad!”

Dio snickered and lightly pulled on her blonde pigtails, “then no boyfriends.”

“Okay…”

Rohan

“Daddy Daddy!” Baby Rohan kicked her school shoes off and ran into the mangaka’s study.

His eyes flickered to the green haired girl, “Hm.”

“Look!” She came to stand in-between his legs and proudly held up a colourful piece of paper, a little bit too close to his face. “That’s me, and that’s you and that’s the cat and that’s mama!”

Rohan put his pen down and examined the drawing slightly closer, in actuality it was all scribbles yet even so he’d be framing it in his study.

“Wow, very good.” He pulled her to sit on his lap so he could resume his work, “when did you make this.”

“Today, at Josuke’s house…” she blushed.

Rohan clicked his tongue, yes, he had to send his sweet girl to that imbecile’s house yet it wasn’t of his own will, he had an important deadline coming up and his partner was at work, to say he was very reluctant to let Josuke babysit would be an underst- wait. Rohan closed his eyes, he had to have been seeing incorrectly because there’s no way he saw what he thinks he just saw.

Did baby Rohan just blush at Josuke’s name?

“Did you have fun at…Josuke’s.” He tested.

“Yes!” Baby Rohan nodded vigorously, “he’s so cool and fun!” She added, her flush deepening.

No way. Rohan’s mouth hung agape in disbelief as he pulled Baby Rohan closer to him. What did he do!

“Um daddy are you okay?” Baby Rohan asked concerned, poking his cheek.

“Yes, I’m fine.” He was so done with Josuke, when he next see him he ought to-

Ding dong.

Still irritated, Rohan dragged himself to the door, who could have even been at the door this time, it was almost 9pm!

“Hey Rohan I-”

Slam!

“Jojo!” Baby Rohan gasped, “Daddy open the door don’t be mean!”

Rohan opened the door the tiniest milli-fraction, “what.” He glared at the young jojo.

“Hi jojo!”

“Hi!” He reached to pinch the young girls cheek however Rohan was faster. He put up a finger warning him.

“Don’t.” He grit his teeth, “you know what Josuke. Take five steps back and maintain this distance.

Josuke looked befuddled but did as told anyway, “umm okay?” He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, “anyway I left my wallet here the other day can I just-”

“Don’t take a single step in here.” He couldn’t come in and contaminate the house.

“I can get it!” Baby Rohan beamed.

“No.”

Rohan brashly grabbed the wallet and chucked it towards him. “Next time be more aware.”

“Thanks-!”

Slam!

[dont-f-with-moogles]

hello Terra ♡

new follower here (on Val's recommendation btw) discovering your works and enjoying them a lot so far!

can I request prompt 26 secret Santa gift exchange for the Survey Corps Vets? there's no way this would go smoothly with such a bunch of weirdos, right? you can include ships (I love them all) to pep up your story if you feel like it

thank you for taking prompts and happy holidays (*^‿^*)

Festive Fics 26: Secret Santa Gift Exchange

How Mike Stole Christmas (Canon Universe) Characters: Levi Ackerman, Hange Zoe, Erwin Smith, Mike Zacharius, Nanaba, Moblit Berner 602 words 

Mike seized the final scrap of paper lying inside a squat, cardboard box. Erwin placed the empty vessel on his desk before addressing the small group before him in the same formal tones that he used during every expedition briefing.

“And so concludes the drawing of names for this year’s Secret Santa. Now, just a few reminders with regards to the rules. 5000 yen spending limit. No items which include hazardous, corrosive or highly flammable matter. No conspiring to exchange names with one another.” At this he gave a pointed stare in Hange’s direction.

There came a derisive snort from the back of the group. Heads turned towards Mike Zacharius who glanced up triumphantly.

“Hey, Hange. Seeing as you’ve got me, don’t bother buying me a gift. Just swap outpost duty with me next weekend?”

Hange blinked; their eyes magnified alarmingly behind dark, square frames. “Huh? Surely your nose doesn’t possess that level of power, Mike… unless…”

“Well…” Mike strode with his hands clasped behind him and head thrown back so that his celebrated appendage was held proudly in the air. “...not only do I know that you do indeed have me Hange, but I’ve also figured out who everyone else has too…”

Stopping abruptly, Mike gave a sudden nod of his head.

“Levi didn’t put in a name or take one out. He doesn’t want to participate.” 

Levi scowled at him. 

“Never do. How’d you figure that much out?”

“I got a whiff of ink and paper from everyone here… apart from you.” Mike’s nostrils flared. “Standing next to you, all I smell is deception.” 

“Meanwhile, Hange’s expression was just like the first time they saw Levi using ODM gear.” Mike paused to inhale deeply. “The air is thick with awe and… pheromones.”

Beneath their misted frames, Hange’s face glowed pink. “Why thank you.” 

“...but that’s just because you slipped Levi’s name in the box when he wasn’t looking and you’re excited to see who picked it.” 

Levi closed his eyes in frustration. Mike continued his course, hesitating to sniff the air beside Moblit’s ear. Hange’s subordinate gave a visible shudder.

“Increased perspiration, panic and dread. You could cut the air with it,” Mike concluded. “Moblit pulled Levi’s name. Erwin drew Moblit…” 

The Survey Corps Commander regarded Mike coolly. “I thought I kept a remarkably impassive expression and maintained my body temperature throughout the whole ordeal.”

“But you can’t fool me.” Mike tipped his finger from his forehead towards Erwin. “I saw you mouthing ‘Moblit Brenner…?’ with obvious confusion.”

Moblit sighed. “It’s Berner. Sir, I’ve served alongside you for the past five-”

“And, lastly, I caught Nanaba’s clean, refreshing aroma of relief,” Mike cut across him. “She eyed up Hange’s frog crocs immediately after she picked their name. Nanaba’s been dying for an excuse to buy them a new pair. Those old things are falling apart so badly, they’re more hole than shoe by this point.”

“B-but they’re comfy!”

“And I drew Nanaba.” Mike waved his own slip of paper. “That’s why I need next weekend off. I’ve booked a little place outside the district…” He offered her a wink.

“So Mike single-handedly sank the whole thing?” Levi’s brows were contracted in disbelief.

“So, I didn’t get picked at all?” Erwin gasped faintly. “Hange, how could you just throw my slip out…?”

“Let’s punish him.” A glint of light flashed dangerously where it caught on Hange’s glasses. “Shall we draw the names again and leave Mike out this time?” 

“Wait, wait - ” Mike’s voice caught in his throat. “You can’t blame me! Blame my nose - it’s both a gift and a curse!”

[crulixto]

SATAN’S S/O WHO’S ALLERGIC TO CATS

note: im allergic to cats too (and dogs aswell, a luci chapt on this w dog shall be awaited) and im a big satan(and lucifer) stan sooo i thought it’d be fun to write this :•

edit: this was kinda lame ngl HAHHAHA hope u enjoy

this man, at first he’d be so shocked offended when he found out (before u guys were dating)

he would have probably tried to avoid you at some point

But when during his character arc (lesson 10-11 ish?) he started to empathize with your situation and that it isn’t your fault

Hanging out could get difficult

“i see… then we’ll have to change plans..”

“W-wait no it’s fine really!”

“ I insist”

you’re sneezing all over the place. Every goddamn time he came from a cat cafe.

Walking home from RAD together, he comes across a BOX OF KITTENS.

“Are those kittens? In a box? Who’d leave such precious creatures behind? And in such a small and worn out box too.”

He goes up to the box and literally scoops them all up to carry them all

While he was playing with all those kitties u were just standing there like ‘bitch i cant play with the cats with you are fkin fr rn’

Satan notices this and apologizes then tries to come close to hug you

The key word was tried, your eyes started watering and you started to sneeze and try to sneeze (that struggle to sneeze but you cant do it last minute, ugh my eyes start to bring out a pool worth of tears

He always. ALWAYS. Bring tissues and some medicine with him at all times.

There was one time too Satan made his trained cats scratch Lucifer and his study, you were surprised when you enter Lucifer’s study to pass your tasks to be welcomed by that fuzzy, itchy feeling in your nose and your eyes felt like swelling

Lucifer was deep cleaning his study because he knew you had tasks due that day😭

“My apologies MC, it seems that Satan had brought cats in here earlier today to scratch me. Just leave the papers there.”

Poor guy and you

one of the hardest parts of dating him, he’d come home after playing or tending cats in the streets. And you? Pass the tissues you dont even feel safe from sneezing in his room.

He genuinely tries to hold back from even coming close to a cat now, since he would be probably taking u out on a date, want to cuddle, or anything when it came to bonding with you really. But cats. Cats!

Its the only thing keeping you both apartt~

Honestly at some point he’d get upset and conflicted then just gets a book and tries to find a spell for u allergies to go bye bye

Wrong move, it got kinda worse

So now you’re both sad and miserable

Once your allergies got so bad ur face swelled after he came from a animal shelter

You guys stayed in your rooms but texted/called

“Satan, what are you doing right now?”

“Im reading a book of spells about allergies, dont worry MC once i can put out your allergy we wont have this problem anymore—“

“Hey! Remember the last time you did that?!”

In weekdays, you guys hang out as muuuuch as possible and you secretly hope from within that you both dont pass by a cat so he does not get you sneezin all over the place again

He once passed u a sticky note in class, you opened it and saw cute doodles of cats, just to play with him you draw yourself in a chibi version, sneezing and suffering from allergies

Once you gave the sticky note back to him, he smiled abit at your drawing and realized what it meant

He glares at you, and pulls you by your chair and side hugs you

“Would you look at that MC, no sneezing or such?”

He is smug and proud

“Haha then after recess you go tend to that box of kittens you found at the west tower of the office”

“…” “…okay..” “wait mc—“

[iu-jjang]

[INTERVIEW] 221020 Vogue Korea - IU “Looking back on the past occasionally makes it more meaningful, doesn’t it?”

IU in Seoul, IU in Milan. Is she the same or different?

At ‘Vogue’, many photos were gathered of IU, Korea’s first female solo singer to have a concert at Jamsil Olympic Stadium then visit Milan as Gucci’s global ambassador. IU said, she asked herself, ‘How about this?’ and she started enjoying herself more.

Q: You attended the 2023 S/S Milan collection show as Gucci’s global ambassador. Was there anything memorable for you about the collection? Any look or item that you liked?

IU: The moment I entered, I felt that the showcase venue was small and cosy. There weren’t many seats either. Then in the middle of the show, a partition wall in the centre of the stage was lifted and I realised that it was like a decalcomanie and there was another show on the other side. The twin models who were walking on their side of the stage met in the middle and held hands as they walked. Whether visually or symbolically, it was an interesting performance. I like overalls and this season, there were overalls! I wonder if they have it in my size? I got excited.

Q: During the ‘Twinsburg’ collection this time, 68 pairs of twins appeared on stage. The mother of the creative director, Alessandro Michele, is a twin so it came from his own personal experiences. I think artists need to have the ability to not bypass little experiences in their lives or miss out on the opposite side of the lives they have become accustomed to and turn that into art. I think the way you tell stories through your music and the unique way you express yourself through your lyrics is an example of that. How do you convert your daily experiences into music? Do you observe or make notes or think on the flip side?

IU: I’ve actually been making fewer notes than before. I still write in my diary, but I’m not as obsessive about writing in it anymore. It’s like, ‘The words to remain shall remain, or else just forget them.’ It’s been awhile since the days when I tried hard to cling on to thoughts that are worth becoming items. (But when I work on my full-length albums with more tracks, I’m clearly going to cling on reluctantly again.) Nowadays, there are many artists that write lyrics by themselves that have character. I’m also the type to stick my flag (TL note: stake my claim) on mainly themes I’m good at writing and can hang on to for a long time. I’m hooked on ‘patterns’ and ‘rules’ these days. I’m gradually starting to realise that I’m someone who lives with many rules in my daily life. I get stressed when something falls out of place too. I wonder if I’ll be able to infuse such ideas in my music in future.

Q: We did the ‘Vogue’ cover photoshoot in the house of a Milan collector. It was a house filled with pictures and antique furniture, right? What’s your house filled with? Are you surrounded by them now as well?

IU: As I receive this question and look around me, I realise that I do have a number of pictures in my house here and there. I mostly spend my time in my room and in my room in particular, I have many pictures gifted to me by friends or my fans who drew them by themselves. There are pictures amazingly drawn on canvas and many sketches from my friend’s studio. Perhaps it’s because I have zero talent in drawing, when someone gifts me with a meaningful piece of art, I feel really touched. It contains the affection, time and effort of that person. The pieces that are really precious to me are gathered at one corner of my room. During my concert this time, there was a section that reproduced that part of my room too.

Q: Other than 2020 and 2021 when Covid-19 was severe, you’ve been putting on solo concerts every year since 2012. What does it mean to you to be able to have face-to-face concerts with your fans?

IU: It’s a celebration party with my fans after a year of farming. It’s difficult to replace a concert with another event. The fans who come for my concerts will clearly know what I mean.

Q: Your first solo concert in 2012 was ‘Real Fantasy’ right? Do you still remember what your first concert was like?

IU: I don’t remember it vividly, but of course I still remember it. I did a nationwide tour for my first concert. From gathering concert audience, to maintaining my condition, putting things in action, to ensuring that the tension stays up during my concert each week instead of weakening, I was at a loss about everything and felt scared. I blamed the producer a little then for not guiding me on what to do and asking so much of me from the start, but after my concert this time, I thought to myself, “Thank you for raising me to be strong” and contacted the producer separately too. What’s encouraging for me is that my parents who came to watch my first concert 10 years ago and said, “The stage seems too big for you to fill on your own” back then, told me this time. “The stage that extends beyond 100m does not look big at all.”

Q: The concert you had in September was really amazing. You were the first Korean female solo singer to have a concert at Jamsil Olympic Stadium, right? With about 90 people on stage, about 1300 staff making preparations together and about 80,000 fans in the audience. I’m curious about your overall thoughts on the concert.

IU: I felt, ‘I enjoy the stage more than I thought. Things really work when many people put their hearts together. I’m working with some really amazing people. I have a really great life.’

Q: In the teaser video on your ‘dlwlrma’ YouTube channel, you said, “I want to leave a mark in concert history.” Did you manage to achieve what you hoped for?

IU: Yes.

Q: Director Jo Hyunwoo who worked with you from the 2017 ‘Palette’ concert to the 2019 ‘Love, poem’ concert, as well as the 2022 ‘The Golden Hour: Under the Orange Sun’ concert, shared his thoughts on what a ‘perfect concert’ means to him. Usually when IU starts singing, the audience becomes quiet and only participate actively during the sing-along parts, but during your Philippines concert, the audience cheered so loudly that you couldn’t hear the music in your in-ears. You responded that, ‘A perfect concert means differently to different people. That was a perfect concert in a new way.’ In what way was the concert this time perfect?

IU: Despite the 3 year gap, not only me, but I felt that everyone was clear about their roles. At each position, it had to be that person. This concert was not a tour and there were only two days, but if I had the chance to go back again to that day, I would not have been able to make it any better.

Q: How did you feel when you fell asleep the night before your concert? How about after the concert?

IU: It was raining a lot the night before the concert and we didn’t manage to complete the run-through rehearsal, so I went back after work that day with an unsettling feeling. My backup singer who could tell how I felt sent me an image of ‘You can do it ability’, so I thought to myself, ‘That’s right, I’ve done everything I can. It’ll work out somehow’ and posted that image on my Instagram story before lying down in my bed. After the last day of the concert, I went for the after party. They didn’t make it obvious the whole time, but perhaps because the staff mostly felt pressured by the large scale of the concert, many of them were crying. Telling each other that they did well, it was the best, thank you for working together. Exchanging words with each other, I felt a surge of love for mankind that night. I got home late at night and read the concert reviews and felt overwhelmed with emotions which was something I had not felt in quite awhile. I think out of the concerts I had done, it was the concert with the highest level of audience satisfaction. That itself was enough to compensate for everything.

Q: This concert was described as a “musical or Olympics opening ceremony”. In particular, the highlight was the hundreds of drones that formed a picture in the sky. What’s the stage equipment or effect that you were most into? On the contrary, was there anything you had to compromise for practical reasons?

IU: From the performance perspective, I think it would have to be the hot air balloon that went up as I sang ‘strawberry moon’. It’s something that the concert director insisted on strongly since the first meeting. A few months before the concert, together with a few key staff members, I went on a trip to Buyeo for a test run and that was how much we anticipated the hot air balloon performance. It would move depending on the wind direction, so it was very much weather-dependent and I thought I didn’t have a fear of heights at all, but once it went up by more than 10m, I couldn’t sing and whenever it wobbled due to the wind, my heart sank. As I was close to the fire, it was really hot to ride it in summer too. The director expressed his concerns (with a firm expression I had never seen from him in the many years we have worked together) ‘Just. Believe. In. It.’ I’m glad I did. The audience really liked it. What I had to compromise with was time, of course. From when the title of the concert, ‘Golden Hour’, was confirmed, we set the condition that ‘with the sunset as the background, we had to start the concert at 7pm sharp without missing a beat’. But for an outdoor concert, we couldn’t drag it too late into the night. So it was a shorter concert than what I used to do and we prepared for a runtime of 3 hours.

Q: What was a great hurdle for you for this concert and how did you overcome it? On the contrary, what was the most exciting part?

IU: The biggest hurdle was myself. Since a year ago, my ear has been giving me some issues. If I sweat a lot or produce loud sounds for a long period of time, a muscle in my ear rattles and opens up and sound seems to echo loudly inside. As I was preparing for my concert, I trained myself well and made great improvements, but it had been awhile since I stood on stage and on top of that, it was the biggest stage in singing career, so many complicated thoughts were running through my mind. I just kept practising. If my ear opened up, sounds became unclear to me, so I was cautious about singing loudly and afraid to do so. Even if it sounded weird to me, I would just sing it out aloud first and record that and listen to it again, trying to find a way to control it. As I kept doing that, I started to regain my confidence gradually. It can get worse if I go too overboard, but for now, I’m safe. Aside from my condition, the moment I decided to do a concert, I tormented myself and struggled with thoughts like, ‘Would I be able to fill such a large stadium?’ Whenever I had weak thoughts, I remember telling myself, ‘Hey, this is the Olympic Stadium, even if you can’t eat (handle) it, it’s a Go’ to make myself bolder.

Q: After your encore stage, ‘Love poem’, you said, “There’s an issue with my ear, so I nervously prepared for this concert. I could barely hear properly today, but I could sense the support from all of you.” You must have been taken aback when you first heard the diagnosis of your condition. How did you feel back then and how are you accepting it right now?

IU: After hearing the diagnosis, I was firstly glad that it wasn’t an issue with my hearing per se. Since my job requires me to use my voice a lot, although I was at a loss of what to do, I think it was a chance for me to have more humble feelings about my health and this job that I love. When none of the worst case scenarios I imagined happened and I managed to pull off my concert successfully, I’ll never be able to forget how thankful I felt at that point in time. After the articles went out, I was contacted by many people. I even received messages from seniors that I did not have their contacts. There were more people around me with this condition than I had thought. As we use our ears and throat a lot, many singers revealed that they faced the same issue and shared their encouragement and their own tips with me. I also helped those who asked me for help as much as I could. From the perspective of someone who stands on stage, the bond of sympathy and support that we shared gave me the reassurance that I would be able to recover quickly. That was another episode that I was overwhelmed with a love for mankind recently.

Q: During your ‘The Golden Hour: Under the Orange Sun’ concert recently, you started off by singing ‘eight’ without any accompaniment. You’ve mentioned before that it’s a song you want to sing during sunset and something you’ve been planning for a long time”, but what was the reason that you decided your opening for the concert to be this way?

IU: ‘eight’ was a song that I released when I was 28, during a time of Covid-19 blues and a sense of powerlessness myself, when I was tired with everything. As I couldn’t have face-to-face concerts during that time, I wasn’t able to gain strength from the audience. So when the field of performing arts started to become active again, I felt that if I were to hold my concert, I would have to sing ‘eight’ as the first song powerfully and mark an end to the times I felt tired of everything. It’s the only song that has never changed its position the whole time we were deciding the setlist.

Q: During your concert, you said after singing ‘Palette’ and ‘Good Day’, you would be excluding them from your setlist in future. You said, “Now that I’ve turned 30, you’re welcoming moments as good as you felt back then. There’s no reason for me to hang on to these songs anymore.” Over time, you’ve also graduated songs like ‘Marshmallow’ right? It’s not easy to let go of your shining history, is there a reason that you need to graduate your songs? I think it shows your growth as well.

IU: I think looking back on the past occasionally makes it more meaningful. As I work hard to release new songs, I would like to avoid a similar structure to my concerts every year. There’s some misinterpretation in the way it was reported in the news and although they will be left out of the key pieces that make up the regular setlist, during encore or with a freer atmosphere, I can still sing them if the audience requests for them. It’s also my will to continue to produce new songs to fill the empty spaces of the songs that have graduated, so I hope my fans don’t become too disappointed because of that.

Q: It seems that your choice above is influenced by you turning 30. Are there any emotional changes for you as you begin your 30s?

IU: I think it’s a time that I break free from my obsession that things have to be either ‘this way or that way’. As I start thinking to myself, ‘How about this?’, many things have started to become more enjoyable for me. I’m enjoying life, these days.

Q: With your concert over, you’re left with the release of your movie ‘Dream’! You started filming for it last spring, right? Besides ‘Dream’, what other projects do you have lined up?

IU: I would like to show a more relaxed side of myself. I’m always telling my fans, “I want to become uaenas’ hobby.” That’s my flow (TL note: how I’m doing things) these days too, whether it’s an album or other pieces of work, rather than breathless stories, I want to tell warm stories that allow our hearts to relax.

Translated by IUteamstarcandy

[sailorsenshishitposter]

MGR office au part 8

Thanks to mymakuu for drawing what gave me the inspiration for this

Link to previous parts

Office AU 

1 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256876029018112/mgr-office-au-part-1?source=share

2 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256879968468992/mgr-office-au-part-2-electric-boogaloo?source=share

3 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256883048169472/mgr-office-au-part-3-a-day-in-the-life-of?source=share

4 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256886292463616/mgr-office-au-part-4-a-day-in-the-life-on?source=share

5 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256889652084736/mgr-office-au-part-5-a-day-in-the-life-of?source=share

6 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256893000220672/mgr-office-au-part-6-a-day-in-the-life-of?source=share

7 https://www.tumblr.com/sailorsenshishitposter/738256896263389184/mgr-office-au-part-7-a-day-in-the-life-of-steven?source=share

Everyone is at the arcade. They are about to witness the fight of their lives. But first off, how did it come to this?

Zoom backwards to a week ago. Raiden is hanging out at Desperado with his new friend Sam. The Brazilian man was like an affectionate cat and would just not leave him alone until he gave in. They met for coffee and it turns out that they had more in common than he thought. Raiden agreeded to starting a friendship with Sam as long as the man managed to keep his horniness contained. Sam didn't know how he was going to pull this one off but he desperately needed to be with said twink so he would play along if he had to.

One day Raiden was sitting next to Sam at the office. Armstrong hasn't arrived yet so they have some free time. Monsoon looked over only to notice that his colleague was applying smokey eye shadow to the cyborg that he had been constantly drooling over. "Disgusting..." he muttered. Raiden stood up causing Sam to almost poke his eye out with the brush. He walked over to Monsoon. "You got a problem with me!?"

Raiden could never tell what the cyborg was thinking due to his face being covered by some sort of gigantic headset. "Yes I do. The both of you make me sick! Love is a disease that I refuse to partake in. If the two of you want to make out then happily do it somewhere else!" Raiden was stunned. "Sam, I thought I told you that you can't say we're dating or I'll have to hang your ass over my mantle as written in our agreement!" He got ready to use Zandatsu.

The Brazilian huffed. "No I didn't say anything of the sort blondie. As much as I would love to screw your brains out, I need my money maker. How am I supposed to make money on my second job if you take that away from me?" The rest of the group turned to look at Sam. "What is it that you do again?" asked Sundowner. "Onlyfans." Mistral laughed. "Of course he does."

"This is serious you guys!" proclaimed Raiden. "Why the hell do you think I'd date him of all people?" (The sound of a heart being broken like shattered glass could be heard). Now it was Monsoon's turn to retort. "War is a cruel parent but an effective tea-" Everyone groaned. "Just cut to the chase already!"

The cyborg chuckled. I have a proposition for you. Maybe we can settle our differences, man to man." Raiden was curious. "And how do you suppose we do that?" Monsoon grinned with his massive rabbit teeth. "Dance Dance Revolution!" Everyone started to gasp like a enthusiastic crowd. "Okay. Let's say I play your stupid little dance game. What do I win?"

He stroked his chin. "I suppose the winner shall choose." The rest of the group yelled immediately for his internet privellges to be revoked. Something about their data plan costing them a fortune and how no one wants to hear atheist memes that Monsoon stole from reddit. "Fine. I guess I'll take you up on your offer. Now what do you chose?"

Monsoon was going to be a little shit and ruin Raiden's day. "If you really don't feel the same way for Sam then go out on a date with him. That shouldn't be a problem right?" He grinned. Raiden wasn't expecting that. "What is wrong with you!? May I remind everyone that I'm married?" Sam immediately interjected. "IT'S TOO LATE PRETY BOY, YOU ALREADY AGREED TO THIS!"! Raiden sighed.

"Alright then, see you at the arcade tomorrow evening. I think I'll help Sam pick out your dress for date night." Monsoon walked away cackling. It was back to project diva for him. Raiden looked like he wanted to slaughter the rest of the group. Sam then came behind him and gave a small poke. "I know this isn't the best time for this but here's my card. For you, it's free."

Alright, now you're caught up.

Raiden and Sam walked towards the arcade Monsoon had picked. This weird place called the Crown Game Center. "Whatever" Raiden huffed. "Let's just get this over with." Sam had changed out of his exoskeleton suit and now donned a cheer leader uniform. It seemed like he was going to be the only one interested in tonight's outcome. They walked up to the rest of the gang. Monsoon was beaming while Mistral and Sundowner seemed as if they had been dragged here against their will (they had) and like they wanted to go home.

"Well, we'll if it isn't Jack. Here to give up before being beat?" Raiden grumbled. "Hardly. I'm here to put an end to this." Monsoon laughed. "We'll see about that." As the others were distracted, Sundowner grabbed Mistral and shook her. "Hey lady, we can leave now, they ain't gonna notice that we're gone." He was just about to head towards the exit when he noticed the prize selection.

"Well I'll be damned. They got themselves a real poo-chi!" Mistral turned towards her coworker. "What are you talking about?" Sundowner then explained to her about the trend of robotic dog toys of the 2000's. "You know we have Bladewolf at home right?" The grown man pouted. "But it can communicate through its beady lil' eyes and you can starve it!" Mistral sighed. "First off, you can't starve something that doesn't have the ability to eat. Secondly, you sound like a horrible pet owner and third, you're lucky that I happen to be fond of dogs."

"I'll see how much the little son of a bitch costs. Damn. 30,000 tickets. How are we gonna get it?" Mistral looked over to the mini game section. "I have an idea. Follow me." Raiden was looking through the song selection. "So who picks first?" The cyborg snickered. "I think I'll let the loser choose first." Raiden was so irritated that his claws started to graze the screen. He then proceeded to pick Butterfly by Smile.dk. Monsoon turned to face him. "A wise choise but I'm still going to win this."

The song began to play and it seemed as if they were evenly matched. Sam couldn't help but notice the lyrics being about a samurai and desperately hoped that Raiden had dedicated it to him (he hadn't. Raiden was just a weeb who liked katanas). Eventually Raiden was gaining the upper hand. "WAY TO GO BLONDIE!" Sam then remembered what would happen should the cyborg win. "I mean c'mon Monsoon! I know you can beat that twink!"

Raiden was caught by surprise. "Fuck you Sam!" He hadn't noticed how hard he began to stomp in his clawed high heels. "So you want to be on top eh?" the man said suggestively. Raiden was close to losing it. Suddenly there was a loud metallic crunch. "Shit!" The game immediately turned off. "Anyone know what we should do in this kind of situation?" Sam then interjected. "Let's just move to a different machine and if anyone asks, we blame it on someone else." There was no way he was letting the match end with no winner. "Hey, what happened to the others?"

Mistral had taken Sundowner to one of those basket ball games. "Watch this." Mistral then took a ball and got a perfect shot with one of her dwarf gekko arms. She then tossed a ball towards Sundowner. 'Now you try." You would think that being so tall that he would have an easy time but no. He somehow managed to miss every time. "You're useless! Go find another way to make tickets!" She pushed him away and then filled all her arms with basket balls, perfectly aiming every shot. Tickets were soon piling up.

"Damn basketball. I know they say it's American but I know it really comes from those commie fruit cakes in Canada!" Sundowner then bumped into an arcade machine. "Wouldja look at that! They even got themselves house of the dead! Say what you will about the Japanese, their killin' games make up for pearl harbour!" He then inserted a coin and got ready to start blasting.

Now it was Monsoon's turn to pick a song. He passed through each track, seeming like he was deeply lost in his thoughts. Then he picked kimono princess by JUN. "Get ready to lose!" Sam groaned. He was a samurai but he could only take so much of seeing Japanese culture viewed through an anime lens. "What is with these weebs? Oh well. At least one of them is cute." he thought to himself.

Soon loud music began blairing. "This is way too fast!" Raiden yelped. "I don't think this song is possible for a human to beat!" He just hoped that it would leave Monsoon as winded as he was. He looked over and saw the cyborg had split his body apart so he had more limbs to hit the notes on time. Raiden then decided that if Monsoon would cheat, then so would he. He took out an EMP grenade and tossed it.

"What? What's happening to me!?" Everything soon clicked in his head. "THIS ISN'T FAIR JACK!" Raiden laughed while he continued to dance as Monsoon was completely still. "I don't think we ever established any rules. Also weren't you the one using your weird Magneto powers?" Monsoon grit his teeth. "IT'S CALLED LORENTZ FORCE AND YOU WILL RESPECT IT!"Suddenly the cops showed up. It turns out that someone had seen them damage the machine on the security moniter and called for backup.

Police then took Monsoon out piece by piece while Raiden let himself be escorted out. "Please just take me to jail so I can get away from him!" The van drove off and soon Sam was all alone. "Damn it! I'll just have to try harder next time!" Meanwhile Mistral and Sundowner pooled their tickets together. "Alright what can I do for the two of you this evening?" asked the employee.

Sundowner then placed the tickets on the table, causing it to shake from being 50 pounds worth of paper. "As a matter o' fact, I'd like one poo-chi please." The employee knew it was going to be "one of those" situations. "I'm sorry sir but we're all out. You can trade it in for an idog if you'd like." Sundowner looked like he was about to commit mass murder. "The fuck? Who the hell wants some shitty idog? Nobody uses iPods anymore! And I just saw that fucker on the shelf twenty minutes ago!"

The employee sighed. "Sorry sir, it was already purchased by the boy over ther-" Sundowner turned to the child's direction. It was some kid speaking some language that he couldn't understand so he automatically assumed it was "Mexican speak". "Listen here you little shit! If you value that body o' yours you'll know what's good for yeh and gimmie that dog!"

Mistral and Sundowner were now leaving the arcade. I can't believe that's the 5th child you've killed this week." His coworker sighed. She wasn't going to take responsability for this. "I just can't believe it didn't come with batteries. What a waste." Sundowner then threw the toy. His arm was so strong that it managed to find Sam's left butt cheek and bounce off of it, hitting a building, causing it to collapse. The man sighed. "Aye, not again..."

[captainknell]

Happy birthday Marshal Lannes! April 10, 1769

I got a few selections about Jean Lannes from "Napoleon's Military Career" by Montgomery B. Gibbs

The first three, from the Italian campaign 1796/1797

At Dego:

Here also, Lannes, who lives to be a marshal of the empire, first attracted the notice if Napoleon, and was promoted from lieutenant-colonel to colonel.

At Lodi:

Lannes, Napoleon, Berthier, and L'Allemand now hurried to the front, rallied and cheered the men, and as the column dashed across and over the dead bodies of the slain which covered the passageway, and in the face of a tempest of fire that thinned their ranks at every step, the leaders shouted: "Follow your generals, my brave fellows!"

At Bassano:

Lannes seized one of the standards with his own hands, and, in consequence, Bonaparte demanded for him the rank of general of brigade. "He was," he said, "the first who put the enemy to route at Dego, who the Po at Plaisance, the Adda at Lodi, and the first to enter Bassano."

At Marengo:

"The shower of balls from the Austrian musketry was at one time so intense that Lannes, speaking of it afterwards, described it's effect with a horrible, graphic homeliness. "Bones were cracking in my division," he said, "like a shower of hail upon a skylight." Lannes was subsequently created Duke of Montebello.

At Ratisbon:

Napoleon now sent an aid-de-camp to Lannes urging him to expedite the taking of Ratisbon. This intrepid marshal has directed all his artillery against a projecting house, which rose above the wall surrounding the town. The house was knocked down and the ruins fell into the ditch. Still there were two fortified positions to take. Ladders were procured and placed at the critical points by the grenadiers, but every time one of them appeared he was instantly brought down by the well-aimed balls of Austrian sharpshooters. After some men had been thus struck, the rest appeared to hang back. Thereupon Lannes advanced, covered with decorations, seized one of the ladders and cried out: "You shall see that your marshal, for all he is a marshal, has not ceased to be a grenadier!"

At Aspern-Essling:

Just as Napoleon was about to retire for a few hours' rest he was interrupted by a violent altercation between two of the chief lieutenants, Bessieres and Lannes, the former of whom complained of the language used by the latter, his inferior in rank, in giving a necessary order for a charge of cuirassiers and Chasseurs, then under the orders of Marshal Bessieres himself. Massena, who was on the spot, was obligated to interfere between these gallant men, who, after having braces for a whole day the crossfire of three hundred pieces of cannon, were ready to draw their swords for the sake of their offended pride. Napoleon allayed their quarrel, which was to be terminated the best day by the enemy in the saddest way for themselves and for the army.

[hostess-of-horror]

Mask in the Mirror

A Metadede Phantom of the Opera AU Fanfic

@minnesotamedic186 @tibli @thereaderinsertlady @darkmedolie @lemonbaloni @boom-fanfic-a-latta @lulu-baked-beans @hotpinkboots @nonbananon @tiramegtoons

Disclaimer: This is my very first time writing anything Kirby-related, so there's no sort of lore tied to this story whatsoever. Also, I may or may not have written these characters accurately (the Kirby anime is literally the only kind of portrayal I know of). This is all just for funsies, especially since spooky season is already here on Tumblr! This idea all came from a random shitpost I made a few months ago, and after seeing how much traction it got, I decided to finally write a short story about it. I am also planning to draw this AU, too, so stay tuned for that!

Content Includes: Flirting and Slight Suggestiveness (no explicit NSFW)

---

“He fills me with horror and I do not hate him. How can I hate him, Raoul? Think of Erik at my feet, in the house on the lake, underground. He accuses himself, he curses himself, he implores my forgiveness!...He confesses his cheat. He loves me! He lays at my feet an immense and tragic love. ... He has carried me off for love!...He has imprisoned me with him, underground, for love!...But he respects me: he crawls, he moans, he weeps!...And, when I stood up, Raoul, and told him that I could only despise him if he did not, then and there, give me my liberty...he offered it...he offered to show me the mysterious road...Only...only he rose too...and I was made to remember that, though he was not an angel, nor a ghost, nor a genius, he remained the voice...for he sang. And I listened ... and stayed!...That night, we did not exchange another word. He sang me to sleep.”

Gaston Leroux's The Phantom of the Opera

---

“Mi rey...” spoke the mysterious voice, “Mi vida... Come to me...”

King Dedede, draped in his white laced night garb, snapped out of his concentration. Glancing over his shoulder, he rose from his desk with expectancy. He searched around his royal chamber. A week ago, the voice had promised him that they will finally meet when the time comes. Tonight was that very moment. “Stranger! I can hear you, but I don't know where you are! Where are you?” Dedede responded aloud.

“Tonight, I shall no longer be a stranger. As I have promised, I will present myself to you.” the voice echoed, “Look into the mirror... Your Dark Angel awaits inside.”

Dedede glanced at the mirror. Look into the mirror? But there's nothing behind the mirror – he was sure of it! Out of all the secret entryways, emergency escape routes, and hidden corridors, a mirror was the last thing Dedede was concerned about. What could a mirror possibly hide, he thought to himself. But as the mirror across the chamber began to creak open and the gaping crack oozed with billowing fog, he got his answer.

Behind it was darkness, and in the darkness was a mask.

The mask was silver and ornate with black jewels. It faced Dedede, and as Dedede looked closer, he could make out a long black cape below it, wrapped and almost camouflaged. He stepped closer. But he could not make another inch – hesitation took over his instincts. He swallowed, pushing himself to walk towards his Dark Angel. His struggle melted when a hand appeared and lifted itself from underneath the cape, reaching for Dedede's hand. Mesmerized, Dedede inched even further towards the mirror. His curiosity and fascination overpowered his second-guessing. The Dark Angel was here and it was far too late to turn back now. The king placed his hand over the Angel's, and gently did he hold on. Before he knew it, Dedede was being whisked away into the darkness, leaving behind the comforts of his chamber.

Dedede did not know where they were going. He could not see anything at first. But then lights – gold candelabras hanging on stone walls – illuminated their path. With his sight finally clearer, Dedede could now make out who this mysterious stranger was. And what a mysterious character this Dark Angel was! In fact, nothing about his appearance was angelic. Dedede turned to glance behind. “Ah, mi amor, por favor...” the masked Angel pleaded, “Do not look away. I promise that no harm will come to you. I have waited so long for this moment, and at long last, here we are. Together, as destiny foretold.” Further down the candlelit stone hallway they went, stretching deeper into wherever it lead. Soon, the Dark Angel, his hand still holding on to Dedede's, pressed a hidden button among the stone bricks. As the button activated, a secret door opened right in front of them. There behind that concealed entrance was an astonishing sight.

The large chamber was completely adorned with candles in almost altar-like fashion, shedding light on the various carvings of melodramatic scenes. The figures, some semi-nude, eternally displayed in almost every corner, posed with such a passion Dedede only found in film and novels. He blushed at the very sight; his eyes continued to wander. There before them was a massive organ, masterfully crafted in gold and polished wood, placed in the middle of a mural. Where did all of this come from? How did this Dark Angel manage to get this setup within the castle?

Or rather...Underneath the castle?

With a dramatic flip of the cape, the Dark Angel welcomed the confused yet enchanted king. “Here is where light ends and darkness reigns. This is where music is born – worshiped! Here, music is the breath of life! Here is where I reside.” he spoke to Dedede, “And here... is where you will know the truth.” Dedede watched as his masked host approached him. His eyes – eyes that glowed beneath the mask – softened as they met Dedede's with an overwhelming adoration. “Mi rey...” the Dark Angel cooed, pulling a bright red rose from behind, “The love that I have for you is beyond mere words. I have seen you from afar – from within the shadows – and I have longed for our romance to bloom. Ah, but I must confess; a thousand apologies for not introducing myself properly. I... am the Phantom Knight... Your Phantom Knight.” Dedede could feel his feathers poof from his chest, the warmth burning bright all over his face. His heart raced with such vigor that he could almost faint from surprise. Delicately, Dedede accepted the rose.

“I... T-thank you...” Dedede politely said, trying his best not to be afraid. Although he was familiar with the Phantom Knight – his voice for the most part – everything was becoming a blur of emotions. Flustered... Scared... Bashful... Concerned... The Phantom Knight, gently, as if he could shatter his royal object of affection into pieces, caressed Dedede on the cheek. “It pleases me to know that you are not afraid of me. Many in this world fear me, so much so that I have to hide away in these walls.” The Phantom Knight continued, “Ah, your majesty... Magnifico....Your handsomeness has bewitched me. It blinds me. Si, it does! And I speak with greatest sincerity.”

Dedede began to lean against his hand, just ever so slightly. A newfound amorous sensation blossomed within him as a soft smile began to crack. He could not help it. A sigh escaped his lungs as he begins to swoon. Pulling Dedede close to him, the Phantom Knight whispered so sweetly, “Eres mi hermoso angel... You belong to me, and to me alone...”

[beatradical]

Have you ever imagined, in your Rapierzel AU, the Team Yell members as the Pub Thugs reenacting the scene where they sing I've Got A Dream to Rapierzel and Raihder?

Hi Anon, YESSSS....!!! XDD Since I am unsure that I will be bothered to actually draw these scenes at all, I shall let you in on my vision...

On their journey, the unlikely trio made a pitstop at Raihder's run-down and shady hometown Spikemuth Village - Yes you did not read that wrong, Raihder (Raihan) is from Spikemuth, Rapierzel (Piers) is from Hammerlocke - so that he can pick up some intel and gear, before they can continue on.

They go into a bar, filled to the brim with Thugs. The thugs consist of various evil team leaders/ members, chaotic gym leaders and elite four members (Eg. Guzma, Grimsley, Sydney, Karen, etc.), and of course, the Team Yell members.

Now, unlike the original Tangled movie where the thugs are hostile towards Flynn Rider, the thugs here are acquaintances of Raihan. They are fairly amicable towards Raihan, but too cold and suspicious at first towards his new companions to share any intel.

This being his first time meeting so many people at once, Piers is understandably apprehensive and overwhelmed at first. To show goodwill, he humbly gifts them the one thing he does best- sing.

To say that the entire pub has been captivated, is an understatement. Raihan was also taken aback with how different Piers' singing voice is, compared to how he usually speaks.

Encores are requested, Sidney even lent Piers his cittern- and thus Piers bashfully held his first ever concert (Pub singer AU unlocked?) to complete critical acclaim.

Of course, Piers also sang about his dream of being free to go wherever he wanted. His audience, moved by his passion, started singing along. This was the most joyful Piers has ever been, and thinks to himself that he would not mind doing this more often, or even settling down at Spikemuth. :)

During their stay at Spikemuth, I've imagined Raihan hanging out with his childhood best friend Lance (the dragon-type champion) here as well, and Piers meeting Nanu, a former Commander of the Hammerlocke Royal Guard during the time of the Lost Prince's birth and kidnapping. He took the incident as his personal failure, stepped down and left Hammerlocke for years.

Now face to face with Rapierzel, the undeniable image (and hair) of the little royal babe he had failed to protect and rescue decades ago, he was relieved and amazed that the prince himself just so happen to waltz up to him in a random pub, one random day, safe and healthy.

Piers of course is not aware of his own true identity, and not wanting to cause any panic, Nanu kept his thoughts to himself. However, he promises his allegiance and assistance to Piers whenever he should need it.

Now warmed up to the trio, the villagers/ thugs proceeded to share the needed intel, Raihder and Rapierzel got some new equipment, and resumed their quest to Hammerlocke. Here is a preview of Raihan's upgrade~ ;>

SPOILER: At the end of the main story, Piers would return regularly to Spikemuth, this time as Prince of Hammerlocke, in order to give royal assistance in improving the living conditions in Spikemuth for its thugs and villagers alike, and to perform concerts for them as well! (... Unlike in SWSH, where Spikemuth remained run-down and unchanged even after the end of the game TvT )

[unknowncreature19]

@lootsofathousandsworld A gift for a cool friend! And there’s a little story to it.

* It was a starry night and Emily was outside around ship. the crew is asleep and she is still awake. Something bothered Emily so much that Keeps her awake she looks at the stars as it helps her calm down. What Emily didn’t know that Peter was awake as well. Peter was doing paperwork and getting stuff ready for the next morning. he had notice emily having those nights that keeps her awake. he decided to talk to her…*

Peter: Hey Emily! *he walks to her*

Emily: oh…hey peter..

Peter: I have noticed you’ve been not sleeping well and you have those nights awake like this. it’s there something bothering you?

*Emily Was so tired that she explained everything to him. Jack is bothering her again! She couldn’t hang out of her friends or work on her machines which she calls them sons. Because Jack was so angry that She still refused him and now he bothering her Like 2 months. No wonder why she came on his ship she want to get away from him and maybe relax but her worried Is got to her best. Peter thought of something that maybe help her*

Peter: Do you want to dance with me?

* Emily Seems shock about that question* Emily: dance? I- I am not best of it * She was honest about it but she was thinking a moment there* Although I did bring my best dress…. But I never use it that much because I only use it when I want to play acting…

Peter: so? * He looks at her* Acting or not acting or Not like the best dancer I think this will help

Emily Looks down and look back at him* Now you mention it… That’s probably it will help me. Wait here please *peter noded Emily walked her room*

* Five minutes later Emily came out in a sparkly beautiful dress. It look like a prom dress but yet it was so gorgeous that Peter couldn’t stop saying wow And this is probably the first time he sees her with her hair down*

Emily: how do I look?

Peter: Emily, you look like a princess in that dress.

Emily: Oh stop it! you will make me blush * She kinda laughed*

Peter: I’m not lying though! * He takes his hand out* but honestly you look gorgeous

Emily: Thank you… * there was a soft smile on her face as she grabbed his hand* Shall we dance?

peter: gladly. * he Reply*

* They both dance On the boat, stars were shining like diamonds. Seems like both of them were enjoying the dance of the moon light! ((space port??)) Half of times both laugh! Half of times Just talk about pranks and other things. Although from all the dancing, Emily was getting so tired That they stop*

Emily: That was fun thank you for the damce of the lifetime

Peter: No problem! anything I can do I will help you.

* Emily yawned* Emily: I should get going to bed I need to sleep. See you later goofball *she pinch his cheek and she ran off to a room. peter Thought was funny but He felt grateful that he helped her out, but now when he comes back from all this he needs to plan something for Jack. Oh yes, revenge it’s coming…*

((Side note!!! Emily is not a treasure planet OC she’s original OC!! Ref of will come soon maybe—!!!!!!!!

You can draw your favorite part of it if you want girl-

[lucifra-writes]

Did a writing prompt thing for the first time in forever and a half a couple years ago and just now got around to crossposting here. Response is under the cut.

You are a demon who ran away from hell and decided to live in the human realm in disguise all was going well until a someone breaks into your house kills your dog and steals your car. Without knowing what you are.

“I’m not really a proper demon,” said Luci, casually. “Not in the way that a lot of people think of. I’m… shall we say, I’m a bargainer.”

“Lady, what the fuck are you going on about?” snarled the gun-wielding man in front of her, gun shaking as it pointed at the ruin of where her left eye used to be.

“The… shall we say, the magnitude of your idiocy.” Luci’s hand passed over her face, and two unblemished, violet-irised eyes stared back at him, gore vanishing from her amethyst suit coat. “Which, in and of itself, is predicated on you understanding whose dog, exactly, it is that you killed.”

The gun dropped from numb fingers. “What the fuck are you?”

“Like I said, I’m not a demon, not properly. It’s more accurate to say… well, I’m a minor goddess. Not worth the time of the big names, like the Olympians, or Ameratsu and her clan. I hang out more with the little guys. You know, Morrigan, Quetzalcoatl, those guys.”

“I-I thought-“

“What, that there was only one god? Please. There’s as many gods as there are people to believe in them, and more besides. The Shinto ain’t all that far off, in the grand scheme of things.” Luci shrugged, then pulled a wooden chair from nowhere and sat down. “Of course, minor goddess is only really as good as saying ‘galaxy’, because there’s about as much variety in us as there is in them.”

“What are you on about?” The man’s eyes roamed the walls, searching for doors that had vanished at the exact instant that he had shot Ava.

“Trying to see if your friend can get in, save you, and drive off in the car he stole? Don’t bother, I’ll deal with him in his own time.” Luci leaned in, rubbing the very much alive head of Ava.

“What- what the hell! I shot your dog! I killed the mutt! So why-“

“Why’s she moving around now? Well, I’ll tell you.” Luci’s eyes began to glow with inner light. “Minor goddess is a measure of worship, not power. Ask me what I’m the goddess of, if you care.”

Luci watched his Adam’s apple bob. “What are you the- the goddess of?”

“Why, that’s an excellent question!” Luci clapped her hands, then stood abruptly, shoving the chair backwards.

“I’m the goddess of every petty evil you wish upon each other. The one who takes your little *malediciónes*, who makes them come just a little bit true, as I draw just a little bit of strength from your anger. You ever notice how you’re always more tired after petty anger than the really big shit?” Luci jerked a thumb at herself. “This bitch.”

“And why- and why would that make you so powerful?”

“An excellent question, with a rather straightforward answer.” Luci snapped her fingers. “Tell me, before I answer you, how many humans have ever lived?”

“Uh… something like a hundred billion?”

“Bingo,” said Luci, grinning with too-sharp teeth. “And ever since there were two of them, there’s been the exact kind of petty evil that I feed off of. In fact, I’m not even limited to Earth, either, I just… well, there’s always at least one of me on each planet that has things that know the kind of small hate that I subsist off of.” Luci leaned down to scoop up the brindled dog at her feet, who panted happily. “Thirteen point seven. Billion. Years. Every petty hate, every spiteful grumble, every evil eye… I’ve been there for all of it, and it’s all made me stronger.” Luci shrugged. “I was here at the beginning, and I’ll be locking up the universe with Death at the end.”

The man’s face was as white as a sheet.

“You know,” said Luci offhandedly, “it’s probably a good thing you killed my dog, of all of them. Gods who can just share their immortality with others, they’re few and far between, and they would be a lot more pissed with you than I am, for the simple fact that their dog isn’t coming back.”

“What does that have to do with-“ he began.

“It means”, interrupted Luci, “that you get a quick and painless death. No permanent harm done, and all that.”

“That doesn’t seem like-“

“Yeah, well, play stupid games and you win stupid prizes. Tell… who are you, Saint Peter? Yeah? Okay, tell him he still owes me my copy of Spaceballs back. It’s a bitch pirating that flick every time some other immortal wants to borrow it.”

“Wait, but what’s gonna happen to Bill?”

“Your friend?” Seeing his nod, Luci continued. “Not much. I mean, I don’t really use the car, so I’m not that pissed. I’m gonna send one of the neighborhood kids out to get it, make a little money, that sort of thing, and he’s gonna have a rash of bad luck for a couple of months, but he’ll be fine, when it comes to me. No more or less my focus than an ordinary person after that.”

He sighed. “Good. Now, babe…”

“Yeah, no, fuck that. Remember the movie I asked you to remind Saint Peter about!” Luci snapped her fingers, and he vanished in a flash of purple light, as if he never existed.

“Alright, Ava, time to go get ready for the barbecue tonight. Those burger patties aren’t gonna cook themselves!” The dog yipped, and Luci turned to the wall, which suddenly had a door again, and opened it again.

—————————

Really wasn’t expecting that, lol. Then again, my muse does have a tendency to get away from me.

This applies the term “Demon” loosely, but since a lot of pagan gods were turned into demons by Rome, I figure this is close enough.

—————————

Okay, so. I wrote this… a couple years ago, at this point, and it’s been floating around elsewhere, but I figure I should probably crosspost it over now. Cheers!

[phoenixyfriend]

The Family Tree is... a Disaster

Takes place in the TCW Leverage AU. It does contain a few deviations, namely that the narrative ended up shifting Plo's role in Ahsoka's life, and Ventress's role overall.

This is mostly just dialogue where I outline the fuckery that is the disaster lineage family tree, not actual fic. It stemmed from my incessant need to justify "25yo Obi-Wan somehow got custody of 9yo Anakin without Shmi dying."

Warnings for: canon character death (modernized), canon violence (modernized), and references to Nazis and white supremacists (Palpatine collects WWII weaponry as a parallel to his canon display of Sith artifacts in his office as chancellor, and Ahsoka thinks it's sketchy)

----

"Okay," Cody says, setting down a glass of whiskey as he drops into the seat across the table. "What the hell is your family tree like?"

Obi-Wan raises an eyebrow, and continues cleaning off the definitely-not-stolen crystal komodo dragon he'd won in today's job. "I beg your pardon?"

"You and Skywalker," Cody says, gesturing between Obi-Wan, who is just sitting there minding his own business, and Anakin, who is across the closed-for-tonight bar and doing something inadvisable on the pool table. "You've said he was your brother, and mentioned raising him, which, sure, I'm over twenty years older than my youngest brother, people take over parenting roles all the time. But you have different last names, have mentioned stepfamilies that the other doesn't have, reference things as 'your aunt, not mine,' and I am just getting... very confused. I figured it was personal and I could leave well enough alone, but considering your older brother almost shot us today--"

"Okay, Xanatos is not my brother," Obi-Wan immediately says. "Just. I just have to stop you right there. Xanatos was a student of my father's for a time, but I promise he's not family. Nobody except maybe Komari would consider him even close, and she doesn't count since she's in prison for life and the farthest thing from stable."

Cody gestures. "That, Obi-Wan. That's what I'm talking about. I don't even know who Komari is."

Obi-Wan purses his lips in a failed attempt to not smile. "Do you actually want the explanation? It's long and unnecessarily complicated."

"So's mine," Cody snorts. Obi-Wan waits, patient and pleasant, and is rewarded when Cody sighs. "Please."

"Of course, my dear. To answer your first question, though, Anakin is my half-brother." With a smile, Obi-Wan digs a piece of paper and a pen from his briefcase. "So, center of the chain: me, my father Qui-Gon, my grandfather Yan, and my great-grandfather Yoda. With me so far?"

"Easy enough. Do you have to go back that far?"

"Great-grandfather Yoda is still alive and regularly escaping the old folks' home to terrorize younger relatives, so yes," Obi-Wan says. "Given that you may just meet a tiny, meddling relative of mine when he's bored, we do in fact have to go back that far."

"...how old is he?"

"We don't know for sure. A hundred and eight-ish is the best guess." Obi-Wan shrugs. "It's not a huge deal, mostly he likes bothering Anakin these days. Anyway, grandfather. Yan Dooku. Inherited a minory duchy from his maternal grandfather decades back. Mostly hangs around there because he's on terrorist watchlists in the States."

"Oh, lovely."

Obi-Wan grins. "Trust me, it gets worse. Anyway, grandfather never actually married, but spent most of his time with his 'best friend' Sifo Dyas, who died about a decade back."

"Gay?"

"Well, we know that now, but they got together in the seventies, and this was back when they were both working government jobs, so, you know. It happens."

"Good to know," Cody says. "So, Yoda's kid is Yan, who inherited a title and land from a maternal relative, and had a life partner but never married. With you so far."

"All of Yan's kids were adopted," Obi-Wan continues, sketching out the first branch away from the Yan/Sifo partnership. "Rael was actually grandfather's cousin, maternally, and ended up in his custody after getting orphaned at five. These days, he does most of the stewardship duties at the Serenno Duchy. His daughter Nim is teaching military history at a university in Germany."

Cody nods. "Uncle number one is named Rael, technically your dad's cousin, has a daughter. Got it."

"About a decade after Rael, they adopted my father, Qui-Gon. He and grandfather fought, frequently, but they did care for each other. My father was a botanist, did bio-engineering. We'll get back to him later, because he's where things get complicated." Obi-Wan made sure to leave room around the name. "Just a few years older than me was--is--Komari Vosa. She is... serving a life sentence. I think she fought Jango once."

"She fought my father?"

"To the best of my knowledge, they both almost died, yes," Obi-Wan says. "She's in maximum security these days. She was an assassin. I'll get a call if she breaks out, and I'll let you know along with everyone else."

"Bad news auntie, got it."

"Last adoption, sort of, is Ventress," Obi-Wan finishes off. "A few years younger than me, is technically grandfather's personal assistant and does secretarial work and the like, but we all know he's planning to leave as much of the inheritance to her as he is to the rest of us. She's aggressive and unpleasant, but she takes care of him and hasn't actually threatened to kill any of us yet, so that's fine."

"How'd she join?" Cody asks.

"Ky Narec was a friend of Qui-Gon's; Ventress was his daughter. Ky died a few years after Qui-Gon did, and Ventress was a mess, after." Obi-Wan shrugs and scratches that connection into the little sketch of a family tree as well. "Grandfather offered her a job until she got herself back together, and then she just kind of... stuck around."

"Youngest aunt, more of a cousin." Cody summarizes. "Now we go back to your father?"

"Qui-Gon Jinn was a man of many skills," Obi-Wan says drily. "Adequate birth control was not one of them."

It's almost a pity that Cody wasn't drinking anything, because going by the way he chokes, Obi-Wan's pretty sure the spit take would have been spectacular.

"I'm sorry," Cody says. "Can you repeat that?"

"I was an accident," Obi-Wan says, not even bothering to hide his smile. "So was Anakin."

"So that sounds like... a story."

"It is," Obi-Wan confirms. "My biological mother has never been in the picture. They had a fling, she wasn't sure if she'd want to abort or give me up, just that she wasn't ready to be a parent, and Qui-Gon volunteered to take full custody so she could go back to her life after the birth. I've never met her, but I kept her family name. You can consider her irrelevant beyond that."

Cody nods.

"So, when I was about a year old, Qui-Gon reconnects with an old flame, they get married two years later. Step-mother number one is Tahl. Lovely woman, I absolutely adored her, and she had a daughter, my stepsister, Bant Eerin."

"I met her, right?" Cody asks.

"Yes, she was the doctor who patched up my bullet wound a few months ago," Obi-Wan says. "With the giant glasses that make her look a little fish-eyed."

"She was nice."

"She is," Obi-Wan agrees. "At any rate, that was our family for a while, and then Tahl died when I was fourteen. Bant wanted to go to a magnet school for medical studies, and Qui-Gon's grief was... not optimal for taking care of multiple teenagers, shall we say, so Bant moved in with her paternal uncle, Kit Fisto, and Kit's son Nahdar. He's a marine biologist, incredibly friendly, and has no idea of any of the rest of my side of the family's questionable activities. If you ever meet him, you will pretend that we are a legal firm with a team of security consultants."

Cody raises a brow. Obi-Wan despairs. "Best you could do?"

"We're not that likely to run into him." Obi-Wan draws out a new line. "So, Qui-Gon deals poorly with grief. This is also around the time that Xanatos came around to ruin our lives a little. He was a very rich and unpleasant man, but he's dead as of four hours ago, so you don't have to worry about him. Or his son."

"His son?"

"Anakin handled that," Obi-Wan says. "Thoroughly. Granta Omega is no longer an issue. He's not dead, but... well. Anakin has his ways. Er--I should probably mention Feemor; he was my father's assistant at the university for a long time. Anakin and I still call him our uncle."

"Also a person to avoid mentioning criminal activity to?" Cody prompts.

"Well... no, but only because I don't think he'd care. The man is, forgive me, more of a 'walking sweatervest' than I am. He's a very bland and unassuming man. He once described himself as the background character of the soap opera that is my family's existence."

"Sounds like a charmer."

"Oh, he's very kind and clever, and witty as well. I adore him, and he really is family. He's just also very, very normal. Not boring, but..." Obi-Wan trails off and shrugs helplessly. "He's an editor for an agricultural research journal. Also not someone I anticipate us running into."

"Noted."

"Right, so, Qui-Gon dealing poorly with his grief didn't involve much drinking, but there were a few months of him trying to... lose himself in the pleasures of the flesh?" Obi-Wan tries, and then deflates at the look on Cody's face. "He was slagging around. Shmi got pregnant with Anakin, who was born when I was sixteen. Shared custody at first, Qui-Gon got him weekends and every other holiday, that sort of thing, and then they got married because they actually did like each other well enough, and it was easier on the taxes."

"So Shmi is stepmother number two."

"Shmi is stepmother number two, yes." Obi-Wan sketches in Anakin and Shmi. "About nine and a half years after Anakin was born, Shmi and Qui-Gon were in a car accident with... well, it later turned out it wasn't an accident, there was a hitman called Maul involved, he's actually Ventress's second cousin or something, I don't know. Grandfather handled most of that problem. Qui-Gon died, Shmi was in intensive care, and I got custody of Anakin as his nearest adult relative. We weren't very close before that, because I was off at university by the time he was old enough to form memories, but that changed once he started living with me. I more or less raised him as a single parent from that point."

"This is why he jokes that you're like a father to him."

"Precisely," Obi-Wan says. "Shmi took about a year to recover enough to move again, and grandfather covered the costs. She still had to live with a dedicated carer and attend daily physical therapy. At that physical therapy, she met Cliegg Lars, whose son Owen was also a patient there. They hit it off, and three years later, they married. When Anakin refers to his stepfamily he's talking about the Lars out in Nevada."

"Nevada?"

"They have a farm. A very, very normal one. We don't drag them into our activities, unless we have an at-risk person who needs a safe house." Obi-Wan pauses, and then decides this really needs to be stressed. "This is important to me and Anakin, that we don't get them involved unless there's absolutely no other choice. Shmi's been through a lot, and the Lars are busy enough running the farm."

"Works for me," Cody says. "We've got enough safe houses that it shouldn't be an issue. I'm guessing this story doesn't end there, though."

Obi-Wan grimaces. "My own love life has been... a bit of a mess."

"I already know about Kryze, at least."

There's that. "I was temporarily engaged to a friend, Siri Tachi, shortly after high school. We were in a relationship, but this was mostly something done to appease a relative of hers that was getting overbearing to the point of absurdity, and she couldn't just cut them off. We broke off the engagement after the relative passed, and we're still friends."

He notes that down, then adds the other embarrassment of his early years. "First marriage was actually a drunken joke between myself and my best friend when we were in college. We got it annulled a few months later because we just didn't have time to drop by the courthouse before then, and he's actually engaged to Asajj now."

"Asajj?" Cody asks, watching in fascination as Obi-Wan tries to mark in both his own short marriage and the newer, long-term engagement without crossing any lines. He settles for just writing the name twice and including an asterisk with 'this is the same person.'

"Ventress," Obi-Wan clarifies. "Yeah, Quinlan's a fun guy. His little sister, Aayla, treats Anakin like a beloved younger cousin."

"Are they also off-limits for criminal activity?"

"No, Aayla's the one that taught Ahsoka how to vent-crawl," Obi-Wan says. "And I'm pretty sure Quinlan has contacts in every major government branch, criminal organization, and Fortune 500 company on the planet. I reach out to them regularly."

"Resources, then."

Obi-Wan nods. "Some time later, I married Satine. We had a son; you've met Korkie. We split due to incompatibility a year and change before Qui-Gon's death. Satine doesn't engage in criminal activity, but Bo-Katan is..."

"I've met Bo-Katan. I know what she's like, Obi. You don't have to explain."

"She works with Maul sometimes."

"...the man who killed your father?"

"Yes. It's all very stupid and convoluted." Obi-Wan still writes her in. "So, that's them. Korkie goes to boarding school, and I try not to involve him in anything. Anakin and Ahsoka like to teach him self-defense and the like, but Satine is adamant that he stay unaware of my less legal dealings until he's an adult."

Cody shrugs. "Makes sense. Is that every--wait, no, Skywalker's married."

Obi-Wan grins. "Yes, and Padme's got twins on the way."

"I was there when he told us," Cody says drily. "He was very loud about it. Okay, how does Ahsoka fit in?"

"Hold on, I forgot Beru," Obi-Wan mutters. "Owen's fiancee. Same rules as the Lars. Okay, you asked about Ahsoka. Right. So. Um."

He dithers. Cody waits for him, and then Obi-Wan just gives up. "Ahsoka, dear, would you like to explain how you joined the family, so to speak?"

Ahsoka looks up from whatever she and the boys are doing--there are multiple beer glasses and straws and duct tape involved, and Obi-Wan doesn't really want to know--and then flips off the table and over to Obi-Wan and Cody. She looks over the family tree chart, and then says, "Oooh, did you tell him about the cult?"

"You were in a cult?" Cody demands.

"No, Komari was. She was head priestess or something. I dunno, it's why she's in prison and stuff."

"I did not tell him about the cult," Obi-Wan mutters, already regretting this. "The Bando Gora aren't a problem anymore. I've already gotten to explaining how you and Anakin know each other."

Ahsoka rolls her eyes, steals his pen, and starts sketching in around Quinlan's name, over by Asajj since Obi-Wan's section is too crowded. "Okay, so, Quinlan's adopted. His dad is Tholme, and Tholme's dad is Plo Koon. Plo Koon is good friends with my Auntie, Shaak Ti, who raised me. They live next door to each other, out in the country, and I'd play in his yard a lot, because he had puppies, and he took me to visit his bees. Whenever Auntie needed a babysitter, she asked Quinlan or Aayla to do it since she knew and trusted them, and Aayla needed pocket money."

"This is so unnecessarily complicated," Cody mutters.

"It is!" Ahsoka chirps. Her grin is far too sharp. "So, this one time, Aayla was watching me when I was fourteen, and she was just helping me with my physics homework. BAM, the door slams open, and in stumbled Skyguy with his arm missing. I've never met him before, and my first introduction is him shortly after he's gotten an unplanned amputation."

Anakin, on the other side of the room, giggles. Obi-Wan just sighs. The Fett brothers appear to be in the land of 'horrified fascination.'

Ahsoka revels in it. "There's blood everywhere, I'm screaming, Aayla's panicking, Anakin's halfway to unconscious and insisting we can't call the hospital, and nobody can get Obi-Wan on the phone. Quinlan's in another country, and Auntie Shaak and Uncle Plo are at a movie, so they've both got their cellphones off. Tholme was faking his death at that point to get away from an incident with the Irish Mob, so we didn't even try him."

"What the actual fuck," Rex breathes.

Ahsoka continues with relish. "We get Bant to pick up, and she's there an hour later with Padme, because Padme knows how to drive the way Skyguy does, and the entire drive there is just Auntie Bant on speakerphone telling Aayla how to stop the bleeding and get him stabilized while Padme's screaming at traffic at the top of her lungs."

"I owe Aayla a fruit basket," Anakin muses aloud. "The anniversary of her saving my life is coming up, it's warranted."

"Five years, baby!" Ahsoka crows. She fist-pumps.

Obi-Wan just drops his head into his hands. "You're killing me, children."

Anakin shrugs, grinning. "You know, I think Fett Senior might have been involved in that fight."

"My shitty dad cut off your arm?" Rex demands.

"No, I think he was busy fighting the Interpol guy," Anakin says. "But he was definitely there. I think. Blood loss kinda got to me after a bit, but I'm pretty sure Jango Fett was there, and also Boba might've been hiding in the getaway car?"

"I need another glass," Cody mutters. He doesn't stand up, though.

"Wait," Rex says. "So who cut off your arm?"

Anakin shrugs with an unsure noise. "Someone tried to convince me it was Grandpa Yan, but he was in the middle of a court case in Italy for some kind of parole violation when it happened, so he had an alibi."

"...did he actually violate parole?" Cody asks, and Obi-Wan thinks he looks like he doesn't know if he actually wants an answer.

Ahsoka shrugs. So does Anakin. Obi-Wan carefully looks at a spot behind Cody, and doesn't explain anything about wine tastings used as covers for illicit arms deals.

"The arm?" Rex prompts, sounding a little desperate to get back to the question he likely thinks is the most important.

"I still say it was Skeevy Sheev," Ahsoka chimes in.

"It wasn't Palpatine," Anakin snaps.

"Your creepy older friend who took you to operas and gives you fancy gifts and knows way too much about swords who was conveniently there to talk to the police and cover for you so you didn't get arrested for getting in the middle of a gang war in the first place, yes," Ahsoka says, dropping into a chair and sighing dramatically. "The guy who definitely hasn't been trying to convince you for a year and change that your wife is cheating on you with your older brother."

"Ahsoka!"

"What? He is."

"Anakin," Rex says, "your life sounds like a trainwreck."

"I'm not going to assume a frail, elderly man cut my arm off!" Anakin protests. "Even if he wanted to, he doesn't exactly have the muscle for it!"

"Grandfather's older," Obi-Wan points out, even though he knows it won't help. "And he definitely still could."

"Ha!" Ahsoka shouts.

"He could have hired someone?" Cody suggests. "Doesn't need to do it himself, if he has enough money."

Obi-Wan has a sneaking suspicion that Cody is deliberately stirring the pot as revenge for Anakin sending him eighty-seven cat memes inside an hour during last night's dinner.

"You all suck," Anakin declares. "Also, what the hell do you mean 'knows way too much about swords,' Ahsoka? You know way too much about swords!"

"Yeah, but I'm like ninety-percent sure that his antiques are Prussian and mid-century German military officer dress uniform relics, and pairing that with the Nazi pistols he's got on display--"

"He's just a history buff! And his family's German, of course he prioritizes that region, it's not like he doesn't have Russian or French or English antiques in there too, it's all sides of the war and--"

"I'm just saying he's almost definitely sending me sketchy glances like he thinks I'm planning to steal the silver on the three occasions you've had me with you when you stop by, and I'm pretty sure it's got less to do with my criminal record and more to do with me being, you know, not white."

Anakin looks ready to blow, so Obi-Wan interrupts. "Ahsoka, you were explaining how Anakin passing out on Aayla and scaring us all half to death led to your friendship?"

Ahsoka blinks at him, and then sticks her tongue out at Anakin and turns back to the chart. "So basically, Skyguy had to recuperate in Uncle Plo's living room for a week or two, and I kept showing up to bother him because he was bored and nobody would give him a laptop for 'security reasons,' because he had to lay low and stuff. He made me help him sketch out designs for a prosthesis and do all the writing for the math he had to do for the 3D printer, and we got to chatting."

Ahsoka hops up and back onto a table, legs swinging below her. "I decided he was cool and started following him around while he was getting used to only having one hand, mostly because I was bored. He showed me how to hotwire a car, and explained the best places to put a bug if you were looking to make it sneaky, and he picked my pocket to show off so many times when he was walking around Uncle Plo's house that I made him teach me that, too. And, uh, then Aayla found out and they got into a shouting match about it and decided they both needed to teach me parkour so I could get out of any mess I got myself into, since I was obviously going to follow them into a life of crime."

"And you did," Anakin says, far too proudly. "You're the best thief in this half of the country."

"Only because Aayla moved out east."

Anakin rolls his eyes and pulls Ahsoka into his side, digging his knuckles into her skull. "Best thief! You are the best thief! Be proud of yourself!"

"Let go!"

"Never!"

Obi-Wan sighed heavily and rubbed at his forehead. "Children, please."

"You're not my dad," Ahsoka growls out at him. "Skyguy, I'm going to bite you!"

"Good luck, the only arm you can access is the one that's going to break your teeth."

Ahsoka shrieks in outrage and stomps on Anakin's instep.

It's almost funny, for all that Obi-Wan's seen it play out a million times before, but the really interesting part is seeing Rex's look of fond dismay.

Obi-Wan thinks he might be adding a branch out to the Fetts soon. He's not actually sure if Rex is interested in Anakin or Ahsoka, and he's smack dab between them in age, so that's not a help either, but... well. The expression is familiar enough.

"Please tell me you don't match-make," Cody mutters to him.

"No, I plan to let the pieces fall where they will," Obi-Wan responds, just as low, and far more amused. "I'm simply trying to predict where those landings are to be."

Cody looks at him, and then back at the roughhousing trio, and sighs heavily. "You know, I really didn't think that you technically being minor royalty was going to be the least convoluted thing in your story, Obi-Wan."

He laughs, because it's true. "I'm first in line to inherit the title, since Rael denounced his claim. Nim isn't interested, and Qui-Gon's dead, so... I'm next."

Cody makes a face. "Delightful. I'm guessing that's not a connection we can safely make use of."

"No more than the Kryze or Naberries, I'm afraid." Obi-Wan claps him on the shoulder. "Chin up, I've plenty others in the metaphorical rolodex, all far less legitimate and far more amenable to work with our little outfit."

"Rolodex, really?" Cody snorts. "You're not that old."

Obi-Wan smiles winningly. "You don't know how old I am, Cody. All my IDs are fake."

"Anakin's twenty-four, and you're sixteen years older than him, going by the story you just told me," Cody points out. "I do know how to do basic math, Obi-Wan."

"I had to try," Obi-Wan admits. "I threw a lot of information at you all at once; I'd hoped you missed some of the ages in there."

"I have eight brothers," Cody scoffs. "And literally dozens of cousins, plus niblings, uncles, aunts, and so on. I have experience on this."

"If I asked you to list of the age of every single relative you have, you'd be able to do it?"

"Do you want me to draw a chart? I can draw a chart."

Obi-Wan can't help but laugh. "I'd be delighted, my dear."

Cody rolls his eyes, but Obi-Wan thinks--it's hard to tell in the dimmed lights of the closed bar--that there's a hint of a blush on the man's face. Obi-Wan lets himself slouch to the side, drops his head to rest on one fist, indolent debauchery in every line of his body. Cody does his best to ignore him, but Obi-Wan knows how to smile lazily and blink slowly and draw a man in.

(The whole 'indolent debauchery in every line of his body' phrasing is Anakin's, from back when he was a teenager trying to read highbrow literature to impress a cute girl... and to come up with new insults for his older brother.)

"So," Cody says, with a cough meant to somehow distract Obi-Wan from whatever's showing on the man's face. "Why, uh, why is your grandfather on terrorist watchlists?"

"Well, he didn't initially do anything," Obi-Wan says. "He was just a gay man who didn't hide it quite well enough, and had too much money and too white a face for someone to just call the cops on a faulty report. The Red Scare was technically over by that point, I think, but if a few people made suggestions that he was more loyal to the country that gave him a noble title than to the United States... he received a few warnings, of course, and it could have all blown over..."

"But?"

"But my grandfather is not a man to do things by halves, and instead decided that if the government was to list him as a threat, then he would oblige and make himself a threat," Obi-Wan finishes. "Living up to their labels, rolling with the assumptions, whatever you'd like to call it. It all irked him, and so he made some incredibly questionable decisions to make the government's lives harder. Some weren't bad, like donating to anti-war foundations that were protesting the Gulf War and the interventions in Yugoslavia, that sort of thing, and some were... nobody really looks well on gunrunning, you know."

"For fuck's sake..."

"Indeed," Obi-Wan chuckles. "Ironically, he has minimal opinion on the optimal form of economics, for all that virulent xenophobia and the remnants of anti-communism were involved in the whole mess. He just wanted to create problems for the people that were causing him problems."

Cody shakes his head. "I want to judge that, but you've met my father."

"Jango Fett is, indeed, also not a man to do things by halves," Obi-Wan agrees, attempting to nod gravely but breaking into a smile at the end. "That man is absurd."

"At least he's not dragging Boba into it anymore," Cody mutters. He drags over the fresh sheet of paper and pen that Obi-Wan offers him. "Okay, right, let's start with Jaster..."

[countrymusiclover]

8 - Under Masters Eye

Part 9

Yoda's New Padawan

@tyrionsprincess30 @mrskenobi19

"We're going against the code. But I have feelings for you too, Obi-wan." I mumbled breaking the kiss locking onto deep blue eyes. I started to pull away but he snakes his arms around my waist pulling me back in so he can deliver a kiss of his own. I smiled against his lips when he breaks it whispering. "Now I know the thrill Anakin gets with not always lisening to me." I chuckled mirroring his bright smile.

A loud fit of giggles comes out of lips feeling Obi-Wan's beard tickling my neck with kisses. His arms wrapped around my waist as we lay under the covers of his bed in his room. It has been a month since we confessed our feelings for each other. The only light in the room is being provided by the lamp on his side table. "Keep your voice down darling or we'll get caught." He mumbled turning my face pressing his lips to mine. I draped my arms lazily over his shoulders kissing him back. "I can't help it Obi. You're beard is ticklish." He shakes his head smiling rolling onto his back with me laying on his chest.

I smiled down at him running one of my hands through his hair until my holligram messenger goes off. I climbed off his chest heading into the closet before answering the message. "Lovely to see you it is my padawan. You need your assistance on a mission I do." Master Yoda appears on a blue holograms figure. Running a hand through my hair I knew he was referring to a mission on a small moon. He was there to delegate with someone but the moon isn't far from here. "I'll arrive there in an hour, Master." I spoke and he bowed his head disappearing as I heard Obi getting up from the bed. Opening his sliding closet I smiled at him walking up and wrapping my arms around his neck. "Yoda wants me to accompany him on his moon mission." He nodded resting his hands on my hips.

"Well I don't need to remind you to be careful. But I'll still be keeping an eye on you." He spoke kissing my forehead before I throw my robe back on. Grabbing my lightsaber and heading for a ship. Entering the planets atmosphere I land the ship but I nearly get blasted by a Rodgers Droid. Drawing my lightsaber I jump up knocking their heads off before Master Yoda appears from the purple trees ushering me to follow him quickly. We run up to the highest rock seeing some tanks filled with droids searching for us. "Master Yoda, what exactly happened. Why are they targeting you?" He looks up at me jumping down from rock to rock where I follow after him. "Set a trap they did. Greet them we shall."

Yoda takes a seat as all the tanks guns aim directly at us. The lead Droid shouted to his team firing at us. Master Yoda launched himself up into the air flipping and coming down to the ground with his lightsaber drawn. I draw mine running forward throwing my left hand out, lifting some of the droids throwing them into each other. Yoda runs forward underneath the main tank cutting a hole with his weapon. He jumped up inside it grabbing a Droid that wined. "But I just got promoted." I chuckled having four droids aim their guns at me. Closing my eyes I levitate my saber with my mind spinning it destroying them all at once. Some of droids try running away but I make a fist pulling them backwards to me. Pressing my lightsaber into one then throwing it into the chest of another one. My master jumped on the heads of some hanging off the Canon of one of the guns. But when they tried to fire he launched up into the air slicing the controls causing the whole tank to explode.

"To the ship we must go, my padawan." My master takes my hand in his as I close my lightsaber seeing them all destroyed. We boarded the ship for me to see clones flying it. I take a seat beside him staring out the window seeing space for the first time. Sure I've been in space before but it was always after a battle where I just closed my eyes on the fly home. So now is my first time seeing the universe being light up by the bright stars and planet. "Spoke with Master Kenobi the other day, did you not Y/n." I turn my head hoping I'm not blushing in his presence. He puts his hands on his legs staring at me. Obi-Wan and I have been sneaking around the Temple, we sneak through the halls back and forth to the others rooms at night when everyone else is asleep. "Yes I did. Why do you ask, Master?" I questioned pressing my back against the chair.

Master Yoda tapped his chin with his fingers nodding right before landed and got off the ship. I strolled back to my room opening the door and gasped at what I see. There was a trail of roses at my feet leading to my bed as I closed the door. "Obi?" I called out following the trail seeing him sitting at the edge of my bed smiling. "I could sense you were afraid on the mission. And so I thought after something like that. This would be a nice surprise." He mumbled in a nervous tone, glancing from his shoes to my eyes briefly. I sit my lightsaber down running towards his embrace being picked up and twirling me around with grins. "This is so cute, Obi...but I have to ask how did you sneak all the rose pedals in here?" He boops my nose with his own still smiling while wrapping his arms around my waist. "That's my little secret Y/n." I smiled pulling his lips down onto mine feeling him kiss me back deeply.

"Master Yoda saw us talking last week...we need to be more careful or we'll get caught." I mumbled resting my forehead against his with our breath mixing together. Obi-wan moves his right hand up cupping my face leaning down for another kiss. Wrapping my arms around his neck he runs his other hand through my hair. "We won't get caught, darling. Now I feel like I should show you how much I feel for you." He slightly smirked and I blushed not used to seeing this side of him. I pull away a little leading him to the bed flopping on my back and pulling him down with me. He hovers above me with a smile starting to pull his shirt over his head. "Do you want to do this, princess?" I slowly nodded my head yes watching him remove it allowing me to pull his lips back down to mine. He kisses back running one hand through my hair, holding himself up with his other arm when we buried ourselves in the covers both grinning as we made out through the night.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[littlepadika]

🎀 pink (Din)

🧼 laundry detergent (fake dating)

🍄cottage core (innocent kink)

with some fluff and smut included maybe?? 🥺👉👈💘

Hi @ppslutt I don't think we've interacted so hello! Thank you for this request! Omg i am both soft and amused by this idea. Hope you like this... Din is such a cheeky bb but at the same time a feral fucking machine hehe

500 follower celebration (closed now)

Warnings: Asshole ex boyfriend, protective mando, innocent reader, unprotected piv smut, fingering, 18+

source: @reilink

"Can I sit here?"

Din startled. He had been glaring holes into the metal table at the cantina for so long he almost forgot there were other people around. He was in between bounties. Waiting for Karga to come up with something worth his time.

He nodded at the seat across from him which you fell into. He would usually say no, preferring to be left alone, but you were hardly a threat. Young and apparently unarmed. You looked stressed. Eyes darting all over the room. Were you in trouble?

"Thank you." You tapped your fingertips on the table. "My ex is here and I don't want him to see me alone."

"Are you in some kind of trouble?"

"No." You stare down at your lap. "I just don't want to talk to him."

That made sense, but Din couldn't understand why you were talking to him specifically. Most people feared Mandalorians. He expected you to want to hire him or ask him to kill your ex. You glanced over your shoulder. Din followed your gaze, identifying the man in question, an arrogant looking human with his arm around a girl with her back to you both.

"I'll leave you alone in a minute." You turned your attention back to him. "What's your name, sir?"

"Mando." He grunted. You replied with your name. Din's ears perked up when he heard it. The sound of it echoing in his mind. He had never heard such a name before. "Have you ever seen a Mandalorian before?" Din couldn't help but ask.

"Is that what you are?" You felt embarrassed at his amused tone. "Am I supposed to bow or something?"

Din chuckled, which came out as a crackle through the voice coder. "No. But people tend to stay away from me because- because we're killers."

"Oh." You swallowed a gasp. It never occurred to you to be afraid. "I didn't know. I've never been off world."

"What the fuck are you doing here?" You snapped your head up to see your ex standing over you, an angry look on his face. "I thought you didn't like going out."

"I-I can go where I please!" You jut your chin out.

"Fucking bitch. You're just spying on me, aren't you?" Your ex spat. Din clenched his fist, not liking the way this bastard was speaking to you. He could easily break this man's arm and hardly break a sweat.

"I'm not!" You cried shrilly. "I didn't know you'd even be here."

"What are you doing with him?" Your ex turned to Mando with a sneer. "Tryin to make me jealous?"

"Obviously it worked." You glared. "Now go away."

"No hang on- you're gonna come with me and we're gonna talk."

"I think it's time for you to go." Din rested his hand on his holster, his voice impossibly low. You shivered in your seat.

"Whatever." The man gave up, backing up a little. "Good luck with this one, Mando. She's a prude."

You looked down in shame feeling angry tears sting your eyes. It was hard to believe you once loved this asshole. Din felt his temper flare in his chest. Your ex finally left, looking over his shoulder a few times to watch you and Din.

"I'm sorry." You wrapped your arms around yourself. "I'll leave you alone now."

"I don't mind." Din said, surprising himself. He hated seeing you so upset. He thought about going up to that bastard and putting a hole in his chest, but that wouldn't make you feel better. "Can I get you something?"

"I don't know." You looked up at the bar trying to read the menu overhead.

"What kind of fake boyfriend would I be?" Din joked, hoping to see you smile. It worked. You let out a small giggle into your hand that made Din's heart constrict strangely. He ordered you a Tatooine Sunset.

"You don't want one?"

"No. Thank you." Din hesitated before adding "I don't remove my helmet."

"Ever?" Your eyes widened.

"Not in front of people."

"Oh." You took a small sip. "It's really yummy. Thank you."

Din noticed the prick from earlier still watching you both. "Come over here, ad'ika." He tapped the seat next to him.

"Why?" You asked, looking up from your cup.

"Because that nurf herder is watching us."

"Oh." You frowned, moving to sit next to Mando.

"Lean into me."

"Like this?" You asked again, tilting your head onto his cold beskar paldron.

"Yes. Good." Din nodded, enjoying the look of anger that passed over that bastard's face. "Sit closer."

"I-I am." You blushed, moving until your legs were pressed against him. He wasn't super comfortable with all the metal.

"On my lap, ad'ika." Din patted his thigh. He was being bold but something about your instant trust in him made him want to hold you closer. Feel your soft body on his. You go bright red as you stand and then perch on his knee. His gloved hand covered your lower back.

"Look at him." Din instructed, smirking behind his helmet.

"Oh he's so mad." You giggled. "This is fun, mando."

"It is, ad'ika." Din couldn't' help but agree.

"Wh-what does adeeka mean?" Your tongue got caught on the syllables.

"It means 'little one'."

"I'm-i'm not a child." You frowned, ducking your head. A weak objection as you were sitting in his lap right now.

"It's not just for children." Din placed another arm around your legs, pulling them more securely onto his lap. He regretted that he was in full armor because he could not feel you but that was also probably a good thing or else he'd be hard. You smelled divine.

"Mando he's still staring." You whispered against his cowl which was surprisingly soft.

"Shall we make him even more uncomfortable?"

"Mhm." You nodded, kissing Mando on his cool beskar helmet, where his cheek would be. "How's that?"

"You can do better than that." Din encouraged, enjoying the little game.

"Oh yeah!" You grinned, feeling your competitive spirit rising. "How about this?" You lowered your head, leaning against his neck, kissing him through the cowl. You could feel his warm neck and strong pulse against your lilps. He swallowed hard, his hand tightening over your thigh.

"We should walk out now. Really make him jealous." Din suggested, mostly to stop you from giving him a full on erection.

"Oh yeah." You hopped off his lap, taking his large leather clad hand in yours. "Come on."

Once outside in the warm sun you laughed at your antics. You had never had so much fun. You used to fear your ex. He was mean and cruel. You felt safe now that you had Mando. You tried not to worry what would happen when Mando was gone. Din watched you hungrily, beaming up at him, your face lit up in the daylight. He subtly turned off his tracking view in his visor so he could just see you without any distractions on his screen.

"Thank you Mando."

"You're welcome." He let go of your hand making your face fall. "What's wrong?"

"I want to keep playing."

"What do you propose?" Din felt his cock twitch behind his flight suit.

"I think he would be really jealous if I had marks on my neck." You suggested boldly. Din shook his head in disbelief.

"You are not a prude, you know that? I'm sorry he said that to you."

"I was only a prude with him. He was ugly." You grimaced but recovered. "You're beautiful, Mando, and I want- I want you. Not just to make him jealous but I want you."

"Oh Ad'ika..." Din chuckled. "We can do both."

This led to Din taking you in the alleyway behind the cantina. First he knelt down between your legs and fingered you until you were dripping into his hand. He wanted to watch your little cunt squeeze and flutter. Your little mewls grew louder and louder until you came with a cry. Din loved how innocent you were. You didn't even know how to be quiet. You didn't hide your pleasure. He hoped your shitty ex was listening. Hearing your sounds that he never got to draw from you.

Next he stood lifting you up with ease onto his hips. You were already delirious from your first orgasm you shot up to the stars when he entered you. You tightened your legs around his waist, holding onto his broad shoulders. All thoughts of being seen or herd left your mind. You were overwhelmed, Mando pushing into every corner of your senses along with your pussy.

"Fuck..." Din grunted, feeling your hot walls suck him to the hilt. It had been so long he realized how sensitive he was. And you were so tight. He held your ass up, pulling it to grind into him with every stroke.

"Oh Mando!" Your head fell back against the wall. "This-it's so good."

"Mmm you feel amazing, ad'ika. So fucking perfect." Din watched your face slacken with the pleasure he was giving you, your plush lips teasing him. He wanted to feel them. He wanted to put his lips over every inch of you. Your eyes were drooping, staring right into his visor.

"Stay with me, little one. Look- look at us." He fucked harder, leaning back slightly despite the ache in his lower back, watching the point where your flesh met. Your little swollen clit was sitting right on top of his dick, smashing against his pelvis with every stroke.

"Oh-Maker-I'm gonna cum again." You cried, scrabbling against his shoulders for better leverage. You wanted to fuck him back. Din readjusted his grip allowing one hand to be free to circle your clit.

"Who's making you cum?"

"You! You, Mando!" You cried feeling your stomach go incredibly tight then spasming with your orgasm.

"You think anyone else could make you feel this?" Din sped up also nearing his own climax. His voice was rough and torn up, cracking and stressing the voicecoder.

"No-no one else!" You answered eagerly, wanting to please him. "I don't want anyone else."

"Good girl. Fuck- you want to be mine?" He felt his cock twitching. He was seconds away from cumming inside of you. This was the last chance to pull out.

"I want to-be yours- please." You nodded vigorously, looking up at him so he could see you meant it. You dug your heels into his lower back. His grunts became short and quick with each thrust then he came abruptly, crashing his forehead against yours. You gasped feeling the spot where you were joined grow incredibly wet.

"Stars..." Din hissed feeling his pleasure prickle down his spine into his cock. "You mean it, ad'ika?"

"Yes. Show me the stars, Mando."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My masterlist

500 Follower Celebration Masterlist

Permanent Taglist: @ajeff855 @what-iwish-you-knew @kirsteng42 @fan-of-encouragement @sleep-tight1 @pascalisfairyy @ceniington, @prettypedros 🧁, @pascal-rascal424 @axshadows @prideandpascal @frenchyjuju @pedrosmustache @blackmarketmummy @Idreamofboobear @pretty-brown-eyess @persephones-garden @javierpinme @mylittlesenaar @bellaorisa @elinedjarin @beskarboobs @beskar-candy @dindjarinneedsahug @anaaaispunk @headinthestarz

Din Taglist: @a-skov @pasckles

[clouds-rambles]

hey bestie i was hoping to request xiao, venti, childe and zhongli where the the reader and the character have just had an argument + the reader needs time to calm down from the argument. omg maybe the reader comes back with a gift to apologise

Ask and ye shall receive <3. I’m the kind of person who needs time to relax and process the situation after an argument. I’m always too worked up (read angry) to kiss and make up straight after an argument.

Pairings; (Separate) Xiao, Venti, Childe, Zhongli x reader

Warning(s); breif mention of a wound, alcoholism, swearing

Keep reading under the cut!

Xiao

You’re probably being too harsh on the guy

You had just come back from a tough mission with a few more scrapes than you normally come back, a nasty cut in particular situated on your shoulder was what caused the argument to kick off in the first place

In hindsight the argument started from Xiao’s concern of you getting hurt worse but you were too tired from the commission to really read it as concern

But boy now do you feel bad. You both went your separate ways for the evening and in the morning you still haven’t caught sight of your partner. You eventually go around Wangshu Inn and ask if they’ve seen Xiao.

You get told that he’s out for the day, apparently he caught wind of something manifesting in the mountains. So, you suppose that it’s high time to make an apology gift

And what’s a better apology gift than your partners favourite food? Because your arguments are often few and far between you don’t mind making Xiao almond tofu since it’s not something you’ve associated with apologising

Though you’re aware that the sweet snack means nothing if you’re not sincere with your apology. 

So what’s more sincere than sitting at the highest balcony of Wangshu Inn and wait for Xiao. You don’t mind how long it takes for him to come back just as long as you get to apologise

He comes back just after dusk and you pour your apologise profusely and tell him you understand that he was coming from a place of concern

Xiao is a little distant a short while after the apology but soon you’re reassured that he accepts it when he places his hand on the table for you to take hold of

The two of you sit in silence sat hand in hand while Xiao eats his tofu

You watch him eat with a grin on your face, sometimes just watching the Yaksha sit still and do his thing is enough to keep you in a trance for the evening

-

Venti

Maybe you got into an argument because you’re concerned over Venti’s drinking habits, sure he’s an immortal god but doesn’t he worry about his liver?

Sure the argument started because you’re worried about the archon but boy does he make you angry with his non-sensical thought processes

Venti is the kind of guy who wouldn’t let you leave without settling the argument

Even if the happy medium isn’t actually going to bring any change into the questionable drinking habits

But this argument just feels a little different, you’ve had the same conversation form months but nothing seems to change

You’re not even sure if Venti has actually listened to anything you have said to him about it

So you tell him “Do what you want, but you’re sleeping on the sofa tonight” yeah you just resigned him to sofa treatment. As much as you hate it you’re far too heated to just kiss and make up right now

So the night passes and you wake up with the cold space beside you, you’re confused until you remember the previous nights events

Though your unusual silence in the room doesn’t last long, you presume Venti sensed that you’re awake because you hear a knock at your bedroom door, you’re surprised that Venti is actually here and that he hadn’t sulked off to Windrise where you had originally planned to apologise to him

As you open the door you notice your partner stood before you with a bunch of hand picked cecelia's and dandelions and an apologetic look on his face

You’ve never known Venti to speak so fast he apologises profusely for causing you such worry and promises that he’ll try to drink less, he mentions that he doesn’t wish to give up his Friday and Saturday drinking nights but he’s willing to tone it down during the week if it stops you worrying 

You thank him sincerely and find a vase to put the flowers in

You hug Venti and apologise yourself for being such a worry wart and causing such a big argument

“I’m glad I have someone to worry about me, I don’t know what I’d do without you” You can’t help but swoon at his flowery words and grin at him before the two of you start off the day

-

Childe

It’s a bad habit he has, when you try and talk about something serious with him he constantly cracks jokes at the situation. Which in its self isn’t the worse thing in the world, even you crack jokes to lighten the situation but at some points it goes too far

And today is too far, what started off as a disagreement about where you were going to eat lunch ended up in a full scale (mostly one sided) argument in Childes office about how he can’t take things seriously

You, of course, know this to be false. You’ve seen him in action against his foes and bank business but just in this moment when you are so angry about the situation those rational thoughts go out the window

And what does the bastard do? He cracks another fucking joke

“Is this what I am?” you ask finally reaching the catalyst of your temper “A fucking joke?” 

And boy does the exclamation comes to a surprise to him. No matter how frequent your use of curse words you’ve never directed them at him so it catches Childe by even more surprise

“[name] I’m sorry I didn’-” he tries to apologise

“You didn’t fucking what Tartaglia? Want to make me feel like a joke? Cause you’ve been going down that road at every fucking disagreement we have” you cut him off in a fit of rage “Sleep in your own fucking bed tonight” you add before storming out his office

He tried to follow you out the bank before he was stopped by a fatui agent about some urgent debt collection, so he never got to apologise immediately

And that’s how the next couple of days go, you’ve taken most of the time to cool off and avoid anywhere Childe might be hanging about, your plan works better considering said harbinger was out of Liyue Harbour for a couple of days

Though on the third night Childe appears at your door, he doesn’t bring any gifts, just himself. Childe enjoys gifting things to you so he doesn’t want you or him to associate gift giving with apologies. You’re more than thankful for this

Childe apologises before you even have the chance to invite him in and takes your hand and wholeheartedly promises to try and not make jokes when you have a disagreement

You also apologise and agree that, in hindsight, you blew things out of proportion. You reassure him that he’s a hardworking man and that a few out of place jests make everything more bearable to him.

You invite him inside for some tea, your bed isn’t as cold as it was tonight

-

Zhongli

Disagreements with Zhongli never seem to get any further than that. The archon likes to listen to you vent your frustrations over a cup of herbal tea and usually that calms you down and everything is settled before supper

But every once in a while you’re a little high strung. For instance this time you’re running on a total of 5 hours sleep over the last 4 days. Sleep deprivation could possibly be your middle name at this point 

The only thing you want to do when you get back from your restless trip from Mondstat back home is to just sleep the next few years 

But the sweetie that Zhongli is he quizzes you about your great to horrific trip

Zhongli pulls all the stops he readys some dinner for you and draws a bath when you get back. He even gives you a small lecture about how you’ll feel terrible not washing before going to bed

But with your tired ears, eyes and brain it feels like a personal attack in your entire self “I’ve had it up to here with bloody hillichurls for 4 horrific days, all I want to do is pass the living hell out thank you”

Replace the bloodys with fucks and that’s probably more accurate to what you said

Zhongli is taken a little aback, being an older traditional man it’s unbecoming of anyone to use such sailor language. And thus the male lectures you about it

You take that as about as well as you expect, you don’t respond to him and favour walking out the room, barely getting undressed and collapsing on your shared bed

You wake up the next morning (though when you peek outside it seems like it’s after noon) disorientated. You don’t actually remember coming home the previous day 

Then the memory resurfaces of you yelling at your spouse and regret washes over you

Surely the gift you had prepared for Zhongli would be good enough as repercussions of yesterdays outburst

You see Zhongli in the dining room, to the untrained eye he looks like he’s in a normal mood but to you, you can see his brooding emanating off of him. If you dare point it out Zhongli will deny that he even broods in the first place

He’s the first to greet you without turning around. Rightfully so, he’s still in a mood. So you just profusely apologise for your outburst

You explain that you were running on next to no sleep and while that doesn’t excuse your outburst it certainly explains it. If your spouse so wishes to ask how your trip was you would comply much more now since you’ve had a good sleep behind you. 

You then change the subject to the gift in your hands, some rose tea. Something Zhongli had mentioned when you were courting all that time ago. 

The man sits you on his lap and explains to you about how it was out of place of him to assume you’d be in a talking mood immediately after your travels. You reassure him that under normal circumstances you wouldn’t mind talking about it, you promise that you will do everything in your power to not let the previous night repeat

You then bring out his gift, rose tea, which he had mentioned wanting to taste a little while back, and before long you’re back in the cycle of Zhongli profusely explaining to you some random subject (in this instance rose tea) before you go off to make dinner where you finally share the details of your travels

Hope this is okay! <3 I kind of went a little ham with the Childe and Zhongli one in comparison to the other two hope you don’t mind lmao <3

[frosted-night]

Jack Frost Designs Review

Yes it’s finally his time. This is going to include his book designs including previous incarnations in said books. There are more movie concept designs than book so, let’s dig in shall we?

This was in fact the first ever Jack Joyce designed while he came up with The Guardians Of Childhood. He even comes with his own backstory! (Which was cut. Sorry Joyce posts walls of text so it’s a girthy read.)

So instead of a young mischievous trickster, we got a much more depressing story of Jack. (Jack by default is sad obviously) but this one... It kind of hits differently and almost reminds me of the story he crafted for Pitch. A dad who tried to defend his family but through tragic events was ripped from them and changed completely. Design wise, he’s a lot more tree than snow. There doesn’t exist a colored version of this so we’ll never know if he sported winter and dull dead leaf colors rather than grassy greens.This Jack has a weird presence to him, I can’t put my finger on it. Rating: 6/10 He’s really neat! Just a little too Autumn feeling rather than a blend of both Autumn and Winter.

Nightlight feels like the baby evolution if Jack was a pokemon and that's what I’m gonna stick with. Below is a more recent version of him colored.

In all honesty that one is easier on the eyes proportion wise because sometimes Joyce has ‘interesting’ anatomy choices but we aint going into that today. It’s interesting how his hair somehow looks shorter and longer than Jack’s at the same time. Could be because the longer strands float seamlessly but star boy hair physics what can ya do. It’s a little hard to tell what is his skin and what is his armor, so that is a casuality in making a character only have one or two colors in their color scheme. I love other artist’s depictions of Nightlight but the canon one feels a little weak color wise. Rating: 5/10 Sorry, get some better LEDs and then come back.

Here we have a book Jack but I can’t entirely recall if this was used in the books or not. I digress. This design looks like him still wearing very Nightlight-esque armor/clothing and slowly growing into his new persona as Jack Frost. The intricacies are hard to make out but we’ll work with it. This one is very interesting to me because he very much looks like an older teen close to young adult. His hair looks very fluffy too. Not many complaints about this one but not much praise either.

Rating: 6/10 Not great but doesn’t stand out that much.

Remember when I said Joyce had ‘interesting’ anatomy decisions? Jack looks like he has half a head here and it bothers me GREATLY. This is the adult Jack design he went with. Supposedly he likes the opera and he sure looks it. This! Exists!! Kind of wish it didn’t. The outfit is nice but it just doesn’t fit Jack as a whole. This just screams to me that it’s someone else with a similar-ish hairstyle.

Rating: 3/10 Guess he’d be the...Phantom Of The Opera. (I’ll go home and so should he.)

And finally the final Jack. This is the one that almost exactly resembles the Jack we got in the movies(Probably because it was made after the movie but w/e) but just add a cape on him. I can’t really tell if hes got a hoodie and a cape, or just a cloak+hood on top of a sweatshirt. It isn’t too important because my thoughts on this one are obvious. Rating: 10/10 Edna Mode would have a field day with you boy.

MOVIE DESIGN TIME

Joyce claims this is a design he drafted when Leonardo DiCaprio was considered to voice Jack and I can kind of see that with how his face is drawn here. This Jack looks a lot more like a warrior and less of that trickster look. I can’t say I’m a fan of the weird antenna his hood has but his sword is really cool looking.

Rating: 4/10 Nice bow and sword but it can’t save your fashion choices.

This looks like a lanky 11-13 year old who would put rocks or slugs in my shoes and relish in my disgust. He has the exact look of a snot nose kid and I’m unsure how to feel about it.

His various hairstyles drafted here sort of make him softer looking or just more of a snot nose, no in between. Maybe even an Anime Protagonist.

The top right one almost looks like Hiccup from How To Train Your Dragon if you squint. It’ll be a little hard to rate them all as one individual but why not.

Rating: 5/10 I don’t hate them but they aren’t my cup of tea.

AH- IS THAT A FUCKIN GREMLIN?

Oh wait no it isn’t he looks like a 10 year old. Whatever don’t feed him after midnight. The staff’s design of not being shaped like a G is an interesting tidbit but the whole design looks like he’s really young or like a troll etc. This Jack looks like he thinks girls have cooties uses outdated slang.

Rating: 4/10 This is me being generous.

It honestly looks like he hiked his pants up all the way to his chest. A late teen with horrid fashion choices once again. Not many other thoughts here.

Rating: 2/10 Get a sweater on or something.

This is one is very interesting looking to me. His clothes looked a lot more leather based and very human-like. The tatters, tears and frays all make him look like he was a victim of an accident that never changed his clothes. It makes me wonder if this Jack had the same death as the final movie Jack or something else entirely. Either way, this one looks like hes a mid to late teen which really adds to my intrigue.

This was another image that greatly resembled the design so I included it here. It almost looks like his skin is blue here which is pretty neat to me at least. He’s also got leaf motifs here, which from the first Jack design Joyce made, we can see a pattern here.

Rating: 8 /10 I was originally weirded out by his head but now its not so bad.

This Jack is definitely dressed more like a nature boy rather than him having human influenced fashion and it’s an appealing touch. The tiny leaf sprouting from his staff is also kind of cute since the designers seemed to want to put leafs somewhere on his designs. His hairstyle is also very cute but it reminds me of Sasuke Uchiha in a sense. (Not a setback for me at least)

Rating: 7/10 13 year old Jack is going thru a phase.

I thought this Jack didn’t show up again in story boards but I was wrong!

They look a little different from each other but just similar enough to pair together, so bare with me. The first one obviously has looser pants, slightly longer sleeves and got his leaf motif going. This second Jack is a VERY green. It gives the impression that this Jack made his clothes out of plants and natural materials. Again I’m not wholly sure if greens fit his color scheme but they sure went for it for a while. I can’t say I’m a fan of it because it heavily reminds me of Peter Pan.

However a very similar looking Jack could be found in this storyboard. It doesn’t look as green as the other storyboards made it out to be and looks more like dead grass. Which is a pretty nice touch.

Rating: 5/10 I don’t hate it but it just doesn’t vibe yknow.

Speaking of a vibe...hoo this certainly has one.  This Jack isn’t old but certainly doesn’t look very young, maybe in the 20-30 range, thats just me. He has facial features that remind me of Pitch but resembles the Jack Frost of Santa Clause 3

That being said, I wondered if him looking similar to Pitch was in the storyline of them being brothers.(Which was a scrapped thing, who knew.) He’s a bit more menacing in this design but certainly seems like he relishes in his work.

Rating: 4/10 I’d make it a lower score but I gotta give it props

NOW THIS JACK IS KINDA INTERESTING. This one looks like he’s 16 and going through a grunge phase. He’s gonna play Nirvana loudly and not turn it down even if you tell him too. His staff itself has mini icicles hanging off of it and leafs look stuck to his shirt. Did you glue or staple those on Jack? His hair also looks much longer than his other designs and I kind of dig it( Shut up I’m bias.) I’m not wholly sure why else this design has stuck with me but it just has something about it that I just love. I wish there was a full body drawing of it.

(He also kinda has the same hair as the Jack Frost in Runescape but I wont go on about that hoo hoo)

Rating: 9/10 *Bad Boy by Cascada plays in the distance*

This one definitely feels like middleschooler trying to be in a band. His sticks just resemble drumsticks to me what can I say. I’m a big fan of his shoes and his color scheme screams a hibernating tree in winter. His hair also looks like it’s covered in frost rather than it being wholly white, which is very neat!! He looks like he wants to fight but has slight hesitance. Overall a very balanced Jack.

Rating: 8/10 He’s ready for band practice

Not many thoughts here, I just found these tiny Jack designs cute. His hoodie being a jacket instead just adds to the charm of this one.

No talk to him he angy.

Rating: 6/10 fun sized boi

Now this Jack resembles the one earlier that dressed entirely in leather brown colors, however he clearly is different than that one. I’m gonna say it, he looks like a zombie or undead in this design and its pretty fucking gnarly. I don’t know whats going on with his hair but I’m gonna assume it’s just the wind making it look like that. He just has the vibe that he was once human but was turned into something else entirely. It isnt in uncanny territory but borders that. This version of Jack meeting Pitch and the others would have been *very* interesting. Rating: 7/10 Eat a twinkie Jack you’ll feel better.

The final design! I can’t complain much about this one. The way his staff subtly has a G shape and a hexagon(his signature shape) is a wonderful touch. Additionally, the way the frost is gathered mostly where his hand is such an intricate detail. His signature hoodie is iconic at this point so I can’t bad mouth that either.(I can’t anyway because there's no complaints from me here.) Although, I never understood the leather straps that his pants had or their functions. I couldn’t find any colonial outfits that resembled Jack’s pants so its a total mystery to me at least.

And I can’t go on about this design until I mention the snowflake pattern in his eyes

Pure beauty. It’s at a hue of blue that almost looks impossible to have, combined with the electric blue color of the snowflake in his eyes. The amount of detail in this movie amazes me to this day. Rating: One Great Blizzard <3/10