#i had to do SOMETHING about it...with logic involved ofc

[viveela]

Turts wearing their masks as scarves and some small facial tweaks because they feel too naked otherwise

[txttletale]

Your discussions on AI art have been really interesting and changed my mind on it quite a bit, so thank you for that! I don’t think I’m interested in using it, but I feel much less threatened by it in the same way. That being said, I was wondering, how you felt about AI generated creative writing: not, like AI writing in the context of garbage listicles or academic essays, but like, people who generate short stories and then submit them to contests. Do you think it’s the same sort of situation as AI art? Do you think there’s a difference in ChatGPT vs mid journey? Legitimate curiosity here! I don’t quite have an opinion on this in the same way, and I’ve seen v little from folks about creative writing in particular vs generated academic essays/articles

i think that ai generated writing is also indisputably writing but it is mostly really really fucking awful writing for the same reason that most ai art is not good art -- that the large training sets and low 'temperature' of commercially available/mass market models mean that anything produced will be the most generic version of itself. i also think that narrative writing is very very poorly suited to LLM generation because it generally requires very basic internal logic which LLMs are famously bad at (i imagine you'd have similar problems trying to create something visual like a comic that requires consistent character or location design rather than the singular images that AI art is mostly used for). i think it's going to be a very long time before we see anything good long-form from an LLM, especially because it's just not a priority for the people making them.

ultimately though i think you could absolutely do some really cool stuff with AI generated text if you had a tighter training set and let it get a bit wild with it. i've really enjoyed a lot of AI writing for being funny, especially when it was being done with tools like botnik that involve more human curation but still have the ability to completely blindside you with choices -- i unironically think the botnik collegehumour sketch is funnier than anything human-written on the channel. & i think that means it could reliably be used, with similar levels of curation, to make some stuff that feels alien, or unsettling, or etheral, or horrifying, because those are somewhat adjacent to the surreal humour i think it excels at. i could absolutely see it being used in workflows -- one of my friends told me recently, essentially, "if i'm stuck with writer's block, i ask chatgpt what should happen next, it gives me a horrible idea, and i immediately think 'that's shit, and i can do much better' and start writing again" -- which is both very funny but i think presents a great use case as a 'rubber duck'.

but yea i think that if there's anything good to be found in AI-written fiction or poetry it's not going to come from chatGPT specifically, it's going to come from some locally hosted GPT model trained on a curated set of influences -- and will have to either be kind of incoherent or heavily curated into coherence.

that said the submission of AI-written stories to short story mags & such fucking blows -- not because it's "not writing" but because it's just bad writing that's very very easy to produce (as in, 'just tell chatGPT 'write a short story'-easy) -- which ofc isn't bad in and of itself but means that the already existing phenomenon of people cynically submitting awful garbage to literary mags that doesn't even meet the submission guidelines has been magnified immensely and editors are finding it hard to keep up. i think part of believing that generative writing and art are legitimate mediums is also believing they are and should be treated as though they are separate mediums -- i don't think that there's no skill in these disciplines (like, if someone managed to make writing with chatGPT that wasnt unreadably bad, i would be very fucking impressed!) but they're deeply different skills to the traditional artforms and so imo should be in general judged, presented, published etc. separately.

[familyabolisher]

ive been intrigued by ur recent posts about glass onion, and i was wondering: did you have similar issues with knives out, or do you feel that glass onion's weaknesses are unique to that film?

i think that knives out suffers from the same liberal sensibilities as glass onion, though glass onion was noticeably more smug and self-important in its conviction of its own political significance. if anything, i think the shift in political logics governing how rian johnson tackles the detective genre between knives out and glass onion makes for a very effective synecdoche of the changing sensibilities of the wealthy american liberal class between 2019 and 2022. knives out is very much a product of the trump era, when american border violence was front and centre of liberal discourses (and broadly understood to be the consequence of a republican presidency rather than a necessary prerequisite to the maintenance of the settler-colonial regime itself). the ethos at the heart of the detective fiction template is one of affirming the necessity and moral integrity of policing and moving the image of policing away from an overtly political register towards one in which crime is predominantly interpersonal, and a contemporary piece that looks to build on the detective genre and grapple with its political accountabilities should reasonably be expected to challenge this notion. certainly there are gestures made to the role that policing plays in upholding border violence in knives out – a significant part of the stakes of the film come from the dangers of police involvement in the case when marta’s mother is undocumented – but at the end, ransom is arrested, marta gets the inheritance, the courts step in to administer justice, and this is presented as a satisfying ending, in keeping with the traditional end to detective fiction. knives out, whilst conscious of systemic violence to some very liberal degree, still closes with the assumption that i think most liberals of 2019 would have taken at face value; that ransom being arrested and marta getting the inheritance was enough, that that in itself was a politically expedient depiction. 

between 2019 and 2022, the american liberal sentiment around policing underwent a sea change; the 2020 BLM uprisings in the wake of the murder of george floyd introduced a liberal articulation of police abolition to people who would previously have thought of that idea as an extremist commie position. this was ofc watered down to calls to ‘defund the police’ and other such electoralist bullshit, but the idea that the criminal justice system served the interests of capitalists and enforced white supremacy such that Black people were subject to police brutality was now something that had taken root in the liberal psyche. the idea of a metaphysical notion of justice being served when the perpetrator is arrested at the end of the detective story just wouldn’t quite gel with the american liberal in the way it might have in 2019 (though perhaps this imagines american liberals to be more serious about the politics of policing than they are; at the very least, i think rian johnson seems to have been tuned in to this shift in awareness around what policing is and does, and intended to tackle this). hence how, at the end of glass onion, we see benoit blanc acknowledge that his power to deliver ‘justice’ to miles bron is limited to the powers that he answers to, ie. the police and the courts, and that miles’ wealth + the lack of ‘evidence’ that would be afforded legitimacy in a court of law made prosecuting him impossible. stymied by the system’s inability to deliver ‘justice,’ he galvanises helen to – essentially – destroy miles’ property instead. (& in doing so ofc makes prosecution possible; the fuel that bron was developing is proven to be dangerous, his friends redeem themselves in the eye of the narrative by agreeing to testify against him, etc. – the narrative trips over itself a little as it tries to guide the viewer towards a deliverance of ‘justice’ outside of the courts only to bring our focus back there after all.) there’s a new sense that the criminal justice system doesn’t serve the interests of Black people, that it serves the interests of elon musk-types, and that destruction of private property constitutes an understandable response to such a fundamentally unfair system, but it’s not really … developed into a meaningful or original anti-capitalist or anti-racist ethos as much as it just reflects what american liberals have managed to absorb into their worldview. 

anyway, knives out is still broadly v toothless when it comes to ‘saying’ anything about wealth or capitalism or border violence or racism. harlan thrombey, though a wealthy patriarch, is understood to merit a significant degree of sympathy and appreciation from the audience, because 1. he is, putatively, ‘self-made’; all the ‘dislike’ for wealthy people on the part of the audience is channelled towards his children who are presented as spoiled and vacuous and thus undeserving of his inheritance (which, when picked at, is a fundamentally capitalist sentiment that reifies meritocracy); 2. he is intelligent, which goes back to what i criticised about glass onion – so-called ‘intelligence’ and fluency in ‘culture’ is a white supremacist class marker, and failing to interrogate these concepts or ask if a wealthy person with these supposed assets is still a wealthy person complicit in the same violence as the wealthy person who lacks them is a critical failing of an anti-capitalist narrative that near enough collapses it into old money complaining about the uncultured nouveau-riche; 3. he knows marta’s mother is undocumented and wants to protect her from police investigation, which is supposed to endear us to him despite the fact that he had this knowledge and did nothing for her or marta until he himself died, and 4. he participates in what a liberal imaginary might claim constitutes a ‘redistribution of wealth’ in allowing marta to inherit his capital + assets, which in practice only imagines a shift in ownership over the means of production & capital into the hands of marginalised people to constitute an effective counter to racist border violence. (very good post here identifying how marta’s inheritance of the thrombey’s estate plays into the same great replacement logics that the film wants to refute.) marta is seen as a worthy heroine and inheritor of his wealth because she, unlike the thrombey family, ‘deserved’ it – she’s kind, and intelligent, and makes a ‘useful’ social contribution through working as a nurse, and is so driven by an ontological ‘goodness’ that she can’t even tell a lie without vomiting. i appreciate that some of those characteristics are in keeping with what makes for a compelling heroine of the detective genre, but it just makes me wonder — does the film not hang on to a sense of there being ‘deserving’ vs ‘undeserving’ immigrants? would the film have so strongly insisted on marta’s ‘right’ to inherit american wealth and american power had she not been played by a white actress/had she been, say, ‘morally ambiguous’/unemployed/homeless/criminalised? it’s a very palatable narrative, and one that doesn’t really challenge liberal sensibilities or take serious aim at hegemony. 

i do think knives out was at its most compelling when it made the point about how people with wealth and power might well identify themselves at almost any point on the political ‘spectrum,’ but will all unite when it comes to the preservation of capital. unfortunately, this collapses in on itself a little with the suggestion that a concentration of capital of the sort that the thrombeys hold/held is fine as long as it’s in the hands of the ‘right’ person, and rings a little hollow considering … the rest.

i don’t believe the detective genre is inherently, irreparably reactionary – disco elysium, for example, is a work of detective fiction that clearly sets out to interrogate and undermine the reactionary ethos that powers its genre touchstones, and by and large does succeed – but i do think that the fact of the genre having emerged out of the development of modern policing with intent to affirm certain paradigms (the ‘individual’ rather than systemic nature of crime and punishment, the integrity of the law and its enforcement as upholding a metaphysical notion of justice that extends beyond capitalist hegemony, the naturalisation of the modern policing system) is something that contemporary creators have to be prepared to tackle, and i think rian johnson has yet to tackle any of that effectively.

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 47

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

Damnit, Pidge by spirkylurkey

Pidge has some top-secret-classified-don't-tell-Keith-info that she accidentally lets slip to, you guessed it, Keith. Lance is an embarrassed mess. Keith isn't faring much better, to be honest.

this one made me LAUGH the way that this all pidge's fault and she's literally like. well. you shouldn't be so gay then. and she's right!! they're so dumb i love them

2. Operation: Faking It by @writeonclara

“What the hell, guys?” Pidge squawked, wrestling away from Matt. “Why are you pretending to be a couple?” Or: Matt and Lance pretend to be a couple because Shiro and Keith are clueless as hell.

do you guys remember shatt?? i remember shatt. adashi will always have my heart but shatt will literally always be funny bc ofc thats ur fic name. anyways. this fic is mostly klance but the entire concept is just so ridiculously goofy that u have to laugh. do you like lance and matt? do you like fake relationship to real relationship? do you like inverted tropes? do you like pining? do you like comedic jealousy? then this fic is well and truly for you because it has all that and more

3. all's well that ends well to end up with you by @coruscatingcatastrophe

Keith's jacket gets ruined, so Lance decides to be a good Samaritan and give him his. This is the beginning of the end.

megan's fic literally make me want to eat cement i'm so serious. i've read and been obsessed with TONS of her stuff but this one???? this fucking one???? oh god the slowburn kills me. the blossoming realisation that oh god we've been dating this whole time huh. the CHIVALRY...............a romance novel in the truest of senses and i am going to fry

4. as long as it won't separate you from me (i'll be fine) by @coruscatingcatastrophe

A little intrigued—not that she’d ever admit it—Pidge begins to climb the stairs. But before she even reaches halfway, the door—slams shut. All on its own, or so it seems. Pidge pauses, brows creasing in confusion, as she turns to look down at her dog. “Did you see that?” she asks. Peculiarly, she notes that Bae Bae’s fur is bristled, and he growls at the door before barking twice. That’s weird. Bae Bae never growls. Turning back to the door, Pidge feels unsettled, but she tells herself not to jump to ridiculous conclusions. There’s a logical explanation for everything. Maybe there was a gust of wind from the air conditioner, or the doorframe isn’t level. Whatever it is, she’s going to figure it out. - Or, a Beetlejuice au (kind of). Pidge isn't a fan of her new house, Lance and Keith are the ghosts haunting her attic, and together they hatch a plot to convince Shiro and Adam to skedaddle out of the house. There may be demon summoning involved. But seriously, Adam. Getting your hair set on fire really isn't that bad.

HAPPY (late) HALLOWEEN!!! ive been thinking about this fic all october and finally let myself reread it. ive never loved beetlejuice more than when i read this. it's so fun!! so interesting!! pidge gets a chance to shine!! klance are so!!! the way it had the story of beetlejuice but adapted well!! im!!

5. never thought i'd see the day in my life by @coruscatingcatastrophe

But Keith has somehow gone even paler in the short amount of time he’s been at the table, and he shakes his head. “No, something is . . .” His gaze flickers back to Lance, and he’s startled to find that Keith’s eyes are purple. They’ve got to be contacts. Ridiculous. As if the mullet and gloves and personality weren’t enough. Keith pushes away from the table abruptly, looking incredibly put-off now. “I, uh—gotta go,” he mutters, before angrily gathering up the backpack he’d dropped into the chair next to him and storming out of the cafeteria. “Huh,” Hunk says. “Well, that introduction could have gone a bit better. Don’t take it personally though; sometimes Keith’s just like that.” - Or, a Twilight au starring Lance as Bella, Keith as Edward, and the rest of the Voltron gang as themselves. Lance is insufferable, Keith is awkwardly trying to figure out why Lance is the way he is, and along the way they fall in love, or something. It's probably, definitely the best love story since Twilight itself.

now ive never read twilight and i refuse to on principle. but i didn't find this one creepy and instead it was super fun and dweeby and lance is indeed a ray of sunshine, thank you megan for noticing, and it turns out when the story isn't a hetero mormon wet dream it's actually a good time!!

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[kingconia]

OMG HIHI so I saw some of your posts and I was like “OMG THIS IS SO GOOD??” So obviously I HAD TO MADE A REQUEST (ofc if it’s open‼️)

OKAY SOO I was wondering YK if you would be comfortable enough to make a Vil schoenheit x (gn or fem) Ace detective! Reader

(LIKEE.. Idk for example like let’s take Goro Akechi from persona 5 as a example, OR EVEN RANPO FROM BSD)

ANYWAY you have an AMAZING DAY, WONDERFUL WEEK AND AN AWESOME MONTH‼️

A/N: That was such a curious request! I had a lot of fun working on it, and I thank you dearly for all kind words. Also, I decided mostly to take Ranpo as an inspiration for the character—his belief that his superpower is the deduction fits the setting nicely.

VIL SCHOENHEIT AND GN!READER, WHO IS PROFESSIONAL DETECTIVE

— From the very childhood, you were a quite unique kid. You knew everything about everyone as you noticed the smallest details that others people would never see. And these observations helped you to make a logical conclusion about the person. You were too smart for your own good;

— Your family liked to teasingly call you Sherlock Holmes wannabe, but you knew it better: it was some kind of superpower. It had to be it;

— Others laughed, hearing about that. Until... You woke up in the world of mages, beastmen, and others creatures. And everything started to make more sense;

— When you declared to the headmaster that your unique magic is about being a perfect detective, he was suspicious at first. And so, you decided to prove him wrong;

— You did. Thanks to your powers, you were able to determine the strangeness in other students' attitude;

— You saw through Riddle in your first meeting with him. It took a three minutes to tell that he had problems with over-controlling mother. And so, mixed with your straightforwardness, you helped him not to overblot;

— The same thing happened with Leona. You cracked his plan in the right time, and prevented everything before it even started;

— Your personal favourite case was Scarabia's one. You caught Jamil so quickly—mostly, because he acted too hot-headedly, living evidences everywhere, but it was his motive that flared up your interest;

— As you stopped students from overblotting easily, diving deeper in their stories, excitement filled you even more;

— And so, Crowley unwillingly admitted that you, indeed, should have some powers to do what you do;

— When you were assigned to help with the VDC, you found out the next possible victim of the overblot in a few seconds—Vil Schoenheit himself! And not only that, but you even managed to figure out the little secret of his vice;

— However, you took some time to catch him red-handed on something, to trigger the conversation. That happened when he wanted to poison his rival;

— Vil was devastated by your involvement. But, to his surprise, you chose to speak with him about it privately;

— He didn't overblot. Instead, he broke down in front of you, in the empty dressing room;

— After that, Vil started to respect you even more than. before. If earlier, he thought highly to you because of your merits, now, he also was aware of his respectful you treating people, choosing to talk with them and help.

— He became your friend, eventually;

— Running around, solving mysteries, and doing gods know what, you forgot about a lot of things—drinking water, eating your meals, taking care of your appearance. And so, Vil always looked after you, offering his help in shy attempts to spend some time with you;

— However, there was one thing that he couldn't quite understand about you...

•

”Urgh, give me a week, and I will finish with Ignihyde as well,” you muttered, frowning, while Vil was combing through your wet hair. ”With all of my work, I can't understand how this stupid mirror can't already sort me in some dorm. At this point, I will be fine even with Savannaclaw.”

The thing was... Mirror continued insisting that you held no magical powers to your name.

And the more Vil spent time around you, he started to agree with that—you were human. Human without any powers.

What you think was your unique magic was just your brain. You were smart, you were ridiculously unbeatable in that, surely, you knew it yourself. Then, why you had this urge to think that it was magic and not you, who made everything better?

”Y/n?”

”Hm?”

”Why do you want to have magical power so badly?”

Vil could easily assume that it was because you stuck there, with them, in the place, where everyone had magic. Anyone on your place could have felt inferior about that. But the thing was, you thought, this magic was with you since you were little.

”I don't,” you protested instantly. ”I just have it—and that's the fact.”

”Even in our world, there a lot of people without magic,” he added. ”My father, for example. And—”

”...You don't believe that I am a mage?” You cut through his words sharply.

He couldn't see your face from where he was standing, but he could tell you sounded upset. Vil had no intentions to hurt you, but... He had no reason to lie to you, either. He liked to be honest with people he loved, and he loved you, truly.

”I think, you are the smartest person I had ever know,” he hummed, carefully choosing his next words. ”But that has nothing to do with magic.”

You were silent for a while, and he stopped stroking your hair.

”...But I had to be special, Vil,” you whispered suddenly. ”If I am not, then... No one would pay attention to me anymore.”

Vil knew very little about your previous life.

Perhaps, you had neglectful parents, and it was your way to make them to look at you. Or, maybe, you had too many siblings to feel loved enough.

There were so many scenarios that could explain your arrogant belief, but Vil wasn't you—he couldn't tell people about their lives merely by glancing at them.

”Oh, dear,” he made a circle around you, stopping right in front of you. He took your face in his hands carefully. ”But you are special. Just not in the way we are.”

”But—”

”In fact, I think, you are even more special than we,” Vil squished your cheeks together, so you could stay silent for a while. ”Because our magic could be taken away, and what you have is something that cannot be stripped away.”

You looked down, chewing on your bottom lip nervously. Vil leaned closer, kissing you on the tip of your nose gently. It reddened instantly—exactly for this, he started calling you radish, instead of using a potato nickname—and he smiled.

”You are the most special person I had ever met,” he whispered, as if it was a secret to be shared carefully. ”And you are even more special to my heart. Please, remember that.”

You nodded weakly.

Vil didn't expect you to answer right away, either on his confession, or on the statement about the lack of magic in you. You spent too much time, persuading yourself that you were a mage. Kind words couldn't erase it so easily.

Yet, he knew that you heard him.

And for now, it was enough.

After all, both of you had enough time to figure everything out.

Together.

[junosmindpalace]

Hiii I'm not sure if your requests are still open but 🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲 can you do angst x reader 🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲 like a songfic or something with 'The Scientist' by Coldplay 🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲 (with senku ofc) 🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲 preferably set before everyone was petrified 🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲🧑‍🦲 ty ♡

the emojis in this request made me laugh THANK YOU for your request! i love love songfics.

Senku Ishigami is first and foremost a scientist. He, like all scientists, considers, observes and acts logically. He doesn’t do illogical as a man of science. Giving into illogical nonsense is just…well, illogical.

So when he first considers his romantic feelings for you, he does so from a logical perspective.

You spend a lot of time together, you share common interests, and beyond that, you were a caring, kind and passionate person. You and Senku clicked, and it made sense why. 

However, Senku found himself thinking about how logical it was to be involved with you romantically; as a couple, you and Senku didn’t make sense at all. 

Senku was reserved about his feelings outside of his typical enthusiasm over science and deadpan when it came to certain people, while you were the opposite. And so the two of you clashed horribly when it came to intimacy.

How was it that two people could be so similar yet so different? 

Throughout your possibly (mostly likely- Senku’s still considering) illogical romance, Senku was cold toward your affection, which hurt you greatly. All you wanted to do was be close with your boyfriend. You wanted to be by his side, get to know him on a more personal level, but Senku’s lack of reciprocation of your affection only saddened, and over time, offended you. 

You grasped at straws for any sort of affection you could manage out of him. Weren’t boyfriends meant to spend time with you? Ask you about your day? Be vulnerable and open and affectionate?

Each attempt at vulnerability with Senku led to the man of logic falling short, casually dismissing your efforts and resuming his talk about something science related. You did your best to be patient. These new levels of intimacy and trust took time to build. Each time, however, your heart grew heavier and heavier when your boyfriend made no sign of budging from his usual emotionally reserved nature. 

And so, eventually, you stopped putting in the effort.

You started mimicking him near the end of your relationship. You distanced yourself emotionally, and you spent a lot of the time you’d usually spent with Senku on a science gadget to focus on your own interests.

He just doesn’t care, you would think sadly to yourself. We just don’t work. 

And so eventually, the two of you broke things off. 

Your friends were encouraging and insistent, however. “Every relationship has some roadblocks,” your friend Yuzuriha tried to reason empathically after you had vented your frustration and sadness to her, “you two just need to work together. You love each other a lot.” Somehow your friend saw something that you just couldn’t. 

“How could you be so cold toward Y/N, Senku? I thought you liked each other.” Taiju had asked with all the genuinity in the world, but something about the question made Senku suppress a shudder. “I guess it makes sense. You aren’t into the whole romance thing.” 

Senku isn’t a tin man with a missing heart no matter how much it may seem that way, however. His feelings for you were genuine, he wouldn’t have been in a relationship with you if they weren’t. He had approached your relationship as if it were a complex puzzle, when in reality, science and logic just didn’t fit in this equation. He had been looking at it all wrong. 

To be logical didn’t simply mean to look at the cold hard facts. It certainly didn’t mean disregarding emotion from the equation all together. If anything, it was an important variable. He had a bad habit of getting so caught up in himself that he tended to forget such important details. But at this point, he was too late. He had realized his mistake far too soon, and now you were gone to him. 

He’s lost another important variable- one that makes the whole equation fall apart. He spends a lot of time reflecting, and the entire time he knows, logically speaking, that the two of you weren’t meant to last for various reasons. Yet still, he realizes that he'd been trying to approach something that's illogical logically. His relationship with you wasn’t science, and he was a fool for ever thinking there was anything to compare. It isn't some complex formula or even some video game. 

Did he really need to have a logical reason for liking, loving a person? Enjoying their company, admiring and cherishing them? 

You didn’t want to take it too personally, however. Friends were what the two of you were better off as.

Yet over 3700 years pass and Senku finds that he has an overwhelming desire to start over. His heart, embarrassingly, yearns for something more. To try it all again, to repair his mistakes. It’s only enhanced the more time he spends around your brilliant mind, witnessing your kindness and empathy over and over, especially when it's most needed during troubling times. 

He turns away when he feels guilt bloom in his chest. His attentive eyes can see from your lingering stares and wide smiles that you too would want a do-over.

The cycle of going through the motions would rinse and repeat to the point of exhaustion; this was Senku’s biggest fear, that this hypothesis would be proven true. He hoped that this was a theory he could disprove.

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} Harvey x OFC {Pt.3 Teaser}

tehehheehehe this part is gonna be such an emotional rollercoaster I hope y'all are ready. Enjoy this little tease (also big italic chunks indicate a flashback

Tagging: @rosedpetal @maxdamax @ashcosmo (I love you guys so much btw thank you for the incredible support through this little series)

~~~~~~

“When did you start becoming so protective of her? I’ve never seen you like this with anyone other than Mike, Louis, Jessica and myself. You must… really really care about her.”

“I think it was during the mock trial. She was always off to the side, always attentive, but never spoke up. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over at her every once and a while to see if she wanted to be included. But she never did.”

“This case may seem simple, but the husband is a grade A asshole. He has done everything to cover his tracks and is gonna come at us with everything he’s got. Find me some evidence and make it good.”

They all branched off, heading this way and that. Claudia went to the only logical place, right to me.

“Hi, Mr. Specter. I have one question about-about the case,” she said quickly.

“Of course, what do you want to know?”

“Was Mr. Saros the one who paid off that investment banker? Did the money come from his account directly or a different one?”

God she was so good. “It came from him and his wife’s joint account.”

Claudia had a slight grin to her lips, and she nodded before striding away. She was going to crack this wide open. I just knew it. 

I went back to my office to wait it out, to see if any one could come up with an idea before Claudia. Before I knew it, it was three o'clock and I had a meeting to go to for another case Mike and I were working on. When we got in the car, Mike was looking at me with a knowing smile. 

“What?” 

He shook his head, “Nothing, just wondering how long you’re going to pretend you’re not in love with Claudia Martin.”

“The first year associate?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know who she is. I see you watch her like a starving animal every time she comes into the office. And every time she leaves. And every time she asks Donna something.”

Uh oh.

“Oh please, I have far better things to do than get involved with a first year.”

“You didn’t deny that you were in love with her.”

“Do you want to get smacked? Or I could kick you out of this car at sixty miles per hour, see how you like the taste of asphalt.” Mike did not know when to stop pushing my buttons. 

“I think you just proved my theory.”

“What theory?”

“That you are in love and you are incredibly protective of Claudia. I heard about what you said to Griffin when he offered his help because Claudia was ‘too busy’. You know he pawned that work off to her, right?”

My eyes narrowed, my jaw clenched, as well as my fists. I fixed my gaze out the window and took some deep breaths. Jesus… he had a point. A huge point. God dammit I’m in trouble.

[inventedfangirling]

will i ever get over the bad buddy rooftop kiss?

short answer : no

long answer : after 30 consecutive days where i watched at least 2 bad buddy episodes per day i had decided to take a break for today, and a few more days to refresh my brain. but the forces that be had other plans cos idek from where i saw a snippet of their rooftop convo and i had to go back and watch episode 5 3/4 and 4/4 again and to no one's surprise i keep finding more and more things to appreciate about that episode.

this post isn't to analyze anything from that episode as people far more intelligent, eloquent and observant than me have done before 100 times of before.

i just wanted to do a (in awe) rant of the episode 5 of bad buddy. a true masterclass in story telling, directing, acting and emoting and ofc how can i forget using music as a narrative tool, especially in the scene where pran performs the song and pat now listens to it in the full context of his own feelings and then the patpran wai scene and most importantly in the rooftop scene where the music plays such an important role in building and then maintaining that tension!!

it's such an excellent piece of work because i've watched this already 10 times at least and i literally discovered the show just a month ago. i already know how everything is going to end. i literally just rewatched ep 11 and 12 yesterday. i know its all building upto something far more happy than sad in the end. AND YET.

And yet my heart was in my throat, my eyes were glued to their faces and their micro expressions, i was still in awe at their performance, at the words exchanged both audible and not, and the music behind adding to the' edge of the seat clutching of pillow' experience then the kiss happens and im as shook as the day i saw it.

I genuinely cannot remember the last time or if ever i had an experience of rewatching a (romantic) scene and it's impact gets reinforced and amplified each time i watch it in the way the bad buddy rooftop scene has done it.

that too the fact that i haven't given my brain time to forget the sheen of it, the brilliance of it, the impact of it, the fact that the kiss is a microcosm of their whole story, but even without all of that, that kiss by itself was to say the very least life changing.

my brain hasn't forgotten any of that. i havent allowed it to forget. so then me watching it again so close should not be having this effect on it. and yet.

and i just know that if i hit the replay button again this very instant i will feel all of those emotions all over again. that just boggles my mind, cos what is the explanation for it. logically i should be not this into it each time i watch it. why is hedonistic adaptation not doing its thing? it really do be making no sense to me. i guess this is once again a testament to how great of a show it is, how even beyond all the ingredients we can point out, the actors, the director, the writing , music everything, there has to be some unexplainable magic involved. the kind of magic that i highly doubt can be replicated anywhere. the kinda magic that makes even evolutionary responses bend to its will. solid stuff. 12/10 would recommend.

[scruffyssketchbook]

I wrote that last answer and remembered all of the genuinely horrid things little me put in the comic that I had to remove. I can’t say them here ofc, but if you read Zeon’s Quest before I scrubbed it- mmm, let’s not finish that thought. Anyways. It’s so weird. Like what was I on when I was 12-14? I was Evil to my characters for no reason QwQ. The first plot I ever wrote for ssec the day I made it, Blizz was in tears because of something heart shattering going on involving Vay And in another drawn that same week, Something tragic happened to a main character and Blizz got so angry he basically killed a man. Vay got the worst of it. There is this header that says “I like seeing Vay miserable, it brings me joy” or something idk. I Completely ruined his character. He was so traumatized that there was no logical way he could get better, so I took out all of the absolutely horrible things that happened to him that I could, and he immediately improved a lot as a character. Ofc, he’s still Kind of awful, but at least he isn’t how he was before.

H

I’ve been working on some updates for SSEC since the beginning of January that I think will solve all of the issues I have with how the comic is. It’s exciting!!! And also a bit scary? I suppose? I’ve been… kind of obsessed. It’s been so hard not to talk about it on streams TTuTT but I am TRYING TO KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT (and failing).

…..but there is this ship that I really really like and I want to talk talk talk talk about it but I can’t because if I do people will be like 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨 but it’s really really cute 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 like trust me, they are a cute wholesome couple and I love both characters very very much <3

ANYWAYS!!! Where was I going with this? Idk man. I said this before, but I just want the characters to be happy.

Sorry for the vague answers regarding ssec questions lately btw! It’s mostly due to all of these updates and me not being able to talk about them much! (Nego does not exist anymore tho. Take that however you want.)

[the1975attheirverybest]

Halla, I get that you have to deal with lots of naysayers but wow… that was really not necessary. I'd actually be the first one who’d agree that most of the items in the house set bear specific meaning but, as my reply clearly showed, I'd already looked into the books a bit because I had the very same idea as you. Shocker, I know — there are others who think about those things!! That is why I had the link at the ready btw. I’ve just not found any deep/ convincing connections to the themes yet but I'm open to change my opinion if you find any. I also suggested that they picked the books for family connections/ sentimental reasons. I didn’t say "not that deep". And concerning Faust - I actually studied this play at university (in Germany btw) and teach it every year so that lecture wasn’t needed. I am perfectly aware that it’s about "selling your soul to the devil" duh. The themes that I named are perfectly correct. (ofc there's still more than that…) I'd normally be really excited to read your thoughts/ discuss how those themes relate to ATVB/ SATVB (and yeah, there’s plenty of cool things to talk about) but now I'm not that keen anymore. I get that I am just some rando on anon and maybe I didn’t express myself that well but you really didn’t have to bite my head off.

Excuse me? “Bite your head off” because I said to each their own??? What the fuck, man?

Just how stupid do you think I am? This is why I honestly should get off this fuckin app at this point. It’s not worth it trying to have a conversation with anyone anymore cuz all people want to do is be like you’re wrong and I’m right and how dare you even question me.

Idk you mentioned you’re a German teacher yeah? So i would imagine that as a teacher you are familiar with a middle ground??? That’s something we have in common. Teaching I mean. It’s all about synthesis of ideas. At least mine is. And when we have evidence that a) Patricia has helped to provide specific things to make the set look a certain way but also b) that books on the shelves are specific to Matty (he’s read infinite jest at least 3 times; the song “surrounded by heads and bodies” comes from a sentence in chapter 1 of infinite jest; he mentions David foster Wallace in 2020

In the video where he cries about not being able to perform cuz of Covid, I could keep fucking going but you get my point). Then the logical thing to conclude, as a teacher, is that both positions are valid? This is, after all, the 1975. So, while yes they’d build a set around a certain aesthetic, they’d also never not personalize it because the core of their work is about personal involvement???

I don’t know why any of that would threaten you and make you feel like he bitten your head off but that sounds like your problem not mine. Idk what you think you’re doing here but I don’t appreciate it.

Sorry I bit your head off or whatever.

Alright that’s it I’m done here.

I think I had the right idea the other day when I said that I will only use this blog to post fics from now on. Let me return to that.

Hope this helps. Peace.

[spicedfink]

Thoughts on Fionna an Cake S1 in general? Curious as to what you think of the new characters (such as scarab or the lemon carbs) + old characters' evolved characterizations (Prismo, Simon, Finn, Fionna. ect) （ if it's not too much of a hassle ofc. ）

Absolutely no hassle

I really enjoyed it, the themes were good and some of the lines are just living rent free in my head I do wish it had more time to explore characters or the other worlds but it's understandable why they didn't

(New Characters) Scarab: he's a completely stick in the mud loser, I love him. his whole motivation being he's mad at Prismo for having his dream job but also is so clearly jealous that people like Prismo is great Hunter: he's trying so hard to sound cool and mystical then is just the silliest man you've ever seen - what little screen time he had is 10/10 Lemon Carbs: I'm not sure about them being involved with food career wise, maybe I'm just put off because of Lemongrab's plot. It does bring up the question if Lemongrab 3 has an equivalent as well (or is this saying Simon still thinks of Lemongrab as two people?) Vampworld PB and Marceline: Both extremely cool. Fictional women who can and will kill make me happy. Plus the amount of tragedy each of them have is super compelling Winter King: Good design and made for a good episode but not really my cup of tea Candy Queen: I don't exactly get why she would kidnap Winter King since he doesn't seem to care about Betty (thus losing the princess motivation on his part) and Candy Queen doesn't have that kind of hang up as far as we know - but also she's silly so I don't care too much about the internal logic there

(Old characters) Prismo: Something is just so powerful about happy characters becoming depressed, and it's written so well. The way he talks and acts are still clearly Pirsmo, they didn't overhaul his personality because he's depressed but wrote his personality into his depression Fionna: It was a really good decision to make her defiant. In the AT fanfic episodes Fionna would often be treated as a plot device and have her personality taken away from her so to have her whole deal be her doing what she wants is really good Cake: I think she changed the most personality wise but I like it. Her refusing to read the room is just fun and I think works better for what they gave us then Cake's original more protective personality would have Simon: This seems natural and I like how they wrote him and the themes in his story but Fionna and Cake's add on to his and Betty's back story made it feel weird/uncomfortable. It made it more bitter then sweet for me I guess? Finn: I was a little thrown off by how he tried to help Simon because it felt more like how Jake would help someone then how Finn would (maybe that was the point though?) Farmwold Finn: I adore how serious he is. The juxtaposing of Fionna wanting magic and adventure to this Finn is really good Honestly loved the human versions for everyone else who reappeared in Fionna's world, Gary being a soft dork, Marshal- not helping his friend because he would have to talk to his mom but will call his mom to help a stranger because they're cute -Lee, and Elis P. is genuinely funny

[v3il]

hi! so i've known about plurality for a while but not known much until more recently after some reading. through my therapy journey i've come to understand there are several "me"s of varying ages (mostly ages certain events happened at) within me, and a huge part of my healing has been acknowledging and caring for them properly, such as building a safe headspace for them. We're all definitely the same person, just different ages, and there have been times it really seems one "fronts" enough for me to have a hard time keeping myself in check (or sometimes impossible) but never so much that I lose memory or am unaware of what's going on, etc. Before therapy I needed external help calming down, but now it happens less often and I can usually calm myself down, though depending on which age it is how I do that will vary. I've explored age regression as a possible explanation but it honestly always feels like I'm someone else, who just happens to also be me, but also not me??? Rather than simply being me but younger. I'm also autistic (formally dx'd) so Feelings have always been Weird and Difficult to Discern/Describe. I'm just wondering if this is plurality? Logically I think it would be but sometimes you just need to ask someone, you know? Thank you so much for your time whether or not you answer, I know this is A Lot out of nowhere.

ACK sorry for the late response ive had this in my askbox for a While now qwq

just a disclaimer, i dont know everything about DID/OSDD and im still figuring things out myself as well- im just a teenager on the internet and this is just an attempt to help find a good direction at the moment !!

but anyway, this sorta sounds like something in the OSDD spectrum- i was gonna suggest OSDD-1a because that involves the presence of alters that are fragments/without a distinct personality- and sometimes having parts that are like a 'time capsule' (parts that are like you but different ages/phases)- but 1a also involves full amnesia barriers between these parts. ive definitely heard of OSDD experiences that dont fit into 1a or 1b (i'm pretty sure i relate a bit), so you're not alone!

another thing- i havent personally gone to a doctor myself, but i've heard when diagnosing OSDD, if they know you experience little to no amnesia, they dont really diagnose you with 1a or 1b, but just the OSDD label itself (correct me if im wrong ofc!)

(from https://osdd.one/overview/)

another thing i think might be helpful (from the same website):

i hope this made sense n helped a lil bit, im obv not a professional so if you're able to, open up to ur therapist about it or ask them for recommendations for dissociative disorder specialists if u can ! good luck, anon :] /g

[distortedataraxia]

Hello! If you still do match up or if you still want to do another one, I'd be really happy if you would make one for me! ^^(this is all by your choice ofc) ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡ {I'll try to give a very an accurate description of me!!} Appearance: -Dark brown hair, (close to black and looks similar but is dark brownish if compared to black), Thick type 1A hair haha -Dark brown, almond eyes, double-rowed lashes -a straight nose -downturned lips -apple cheekbones and chubby cheeks -an oval face -I also have moles on the lower left of my chin and lower left of my right eyebrow -a birthmark on the back of my shoulder -medium skintone

Personality: -typology: INTP-T, 9w1 -Straight female - introverted -intelligent but very unfocused - a messy-organized person -instantly clicks with people who have similar interest or similar past -very sweet and loving if we're close -a tease and a bully -strict when needed -loves little kids -seems childish but matured quick since childhood -golden child complex -can understand reasoning and see perspectives both emotionally and logically -accurate analysis -accurate gut instinct -neat and feminine -sly fox, golden retriever, and grumpy cat in one How people describe me: -Morbid -Wednesday Addam-like -A robot -clingy -intimidating -a grumpy person

People are usually very teasing and sweet around me but then proceed to perceive me as creepy and morbid like when I smile at things that are not supposed to be smiled at. Grew up around boys as though the older girls in my family were matured and lived away from me; I picked up some boyish actions while school thought me to be feminine so I'm mixed up on what I am. I have trust issues, its either I'm too trusting or I don't trust at all. I had trauma from abuse at age 6, so I sometimes mistake peoples actions to be what they did to me. I find it hard to connect easily with people my age or older, but do when its younger as I feel the need to be the mature one. I am the parent/baby type of friend, depends on my mood ><. Animal person. My world revolves around them. Prioritizing and planning is not my thing at all!! Nothing works no matter I tell you unless it involves competition. (I feel jealous of people who can prioritize) My mindset is not really as straight as your homophobic relative. I can think of multiple things at once. Music and calming floral scents help my stress and motion sickness. I like anyone as long as you're not scandalous, not a fan of arguments. A REALLY BIG FAN OF DETECTIVE AND COMEDY! I grew up watching those XD. I always have that sudden urge to punch but I always think of the possible outcomes so I don't even try. When I hurt someone's feeling I try to make it up to them depending on what type of person they are but as much as possible no talking cause I feel awkward. I honestly hate when people I know talk about how they were treated worst in childhood when they had emotional and mental support while I had no one because they all mocked me or overreacted. I don't let people take advantage of me unless they were my mother, I could never go against her. I know people's motives most of the time I just don't say a thing. I have Ranidaphobia(frog phobia), no not the cute ones, the toad looking ones. I have barely a sense of fashion, just decency. Always loved art and reading interesting stories. I'm not picky but rather indecisive; again I can think of possible outcomes to my choices. I'm quite sadistic with a sharp tongue, proudly saying its from my mom! (my dad's dead and I prefer it that way). I get more afraid when a character doesn't get something in time than the actual scare in a show. I try to keep negative people out but its inevitable when everyone around you is. I love my mom's food forever. I always thought of having my own family, the effects of of having a broken family does give you the urge to keep one fixed ig. I'm kind and respectful unless I needn't to. Thank you for your time!! I honestly got quite trouble thinking of what to say but I hope you have a great day/night<33

Author note : Hello ! I don't know how old this request is, and i do apology sincerely about the time it took me to reach out to this request - So I can't tell weither or not i was writing for multiple fandoms at the time, however i'll assume this was a ask for Bungou stray dogs, if you come across this post and this was mean to be for another fandom, you can send me a message in my ask box and i can take care of that around - I hope you like this, nontheless, take care and have a good day ! ★double note : i started writing this assuming this was a romantic matchup ask, but when backreading the ask i didn't manage to find weither or not you wanted a romantic ask or platonic (if it's written i apology i may just be pretty tired), so i assumed it was romantic, however you can interpret it however you want, anon ^^

Now into the matchup ★

The first day you guys met was a sunny day in July, you were out to visit your mom this afternoon. It was really hot outside, no wonder, you were melting in place by each steps you took. Until you noticed.. a cat ! Oh my god, a cat ! And the cat was.. hurt, terribly hurt.

What does one do when they see an hurting cat ? Surely they can't let it die like that, what happened to it ?? You approached the cat, and another girl approached the cat, accompanied by a boy.

"Atsushi, look" the girl said, pointing to the cat, the man rushed to the cat and said " Oh that's not good" he glanced down at the cat, and then he glanced up at you " Is this your cat ?" you shook your head no. Even if they were strangers, you couldn't let this cat struggles alone, it seems some humans had fun torturing it and let it out in the wild in this street, nobody seemed to really pay much attention to it, that's messed up.

" No this isn't my cat, i just found it there" you said, you could see that these 2 peoples had good intentions, to be honest, the moment the white haired boy looked at you in the eyes to ask you if it was your cat, you felt something warm, like a good gut feeling, you weren't sure of it, but you felt like this man was good and surely he was going to help the cat, you just knew, and your guts were never wrong.

That day, you got the cat the help it needed with Atsushi and the blue haired girl, and as the 2 strangers were going to take care of the cat temporarily until it finds another shelter, you exchanged numbers because you were very eager to know if the cat was okay or not.

Guess that this day you were late to visit your mom, but you wanted to make sure the cat was okay.

~

I pair you with Atsushi !

~

Atsushi and you go along pretty well, you guys love to look after animals with kyouka and atsushi is really sweet and caring. Despites the fact you may be perceived as creepy and morbid, atsushi may be scared at first but since the day you guys met he has no doubts that you're a nice person because c a t s (simple reasoning here).

Atsushi will never compare his past with yours, he strives to be a person worthy of living and he understands you pretty well.

Atsushi isn't really the type to enjoy arguments either, if anything he wants everyone to get along, so you don't really have to worry about him being problematic.

Atsushi also has an interest concerning interesting stories as he used to use the library of the orphanage as a way to escape the world and breath, kind of like his oxygene - so he knows about a lot of books and you guys certainly can discuss interesting stories together. Atsushi can be pretty shy and akward, but he can be very loving and affectionate and he'll do his best so that you feel comfortable aswell.

I can definitely see Atsushi wanting to build a family outside of the main storyline plot, and he'll surely value his responsibilities as a dad greatly.

I think you guys can get along very well and understand each other too, i can imagine you guys going on walks, and stopping by to feed some animals - Atsushi will definitely respect your ranidaphobia and if you guys ever come across the toad-looking frogs, he'll uhm.. try to defend you ; i can imagine something quite like this, it could be pretty akward but funny, anyways i will let that up to you to imagine !

Atsushi is not the type to force you to talk when you don't want to so you don't have to worry about that, i think one of atsushi love's language may be gift giving so i can imagine him buying you or making you a gift there and there under kyouka's advices as you and her may be platonically close, i can also imagine you, atsushi and kyouka draw some things together.

Nontheless, Atsushi will always respect you and you guys can get a long on a lot of possible things, you're overall a very sweet pair

[daz4i]

If you had to invent any kind of AU involving Nikolai, what would it be?

ooooooooo probably some performer au! actor or musician, but not a big one. he tends to explore philosophical and deep topics in his works so not a lot of people are into it. the story is more about the struggles of remaining true to yourself vs needing to make a living (yusuke's confidant-esque situation, yknow how it is), and how it affects other aspects of his life like, if he has friends in this setting, how it affects his bond with them to struggle this much and probably not being the most stable in general.

ok putting it more coherently lemme brainstorm it into a proper story (that halfway through i realized is basically a tick tick boom rewrite. i am so sorry. i did try to stray from it i promise) (also this got so long i'm sorry. so under a read more it goes):

nikolai, 26, just wrapped up a solo project he's been working on where he writes, directs, and performs. it's a bit abstract, unclear, and confusing, but he's proud of the result regardless

however, after only 2 nights, the venue tells him his show simply does not pull enough audience so they know he won't be able to keep paying them to rent the place, and that tonight will be his last run

still, he pulls through, finishes the show with a smile, except this time in the end he adds something to the show to... maybe not ruin but kind of vandalize the venue a bit, as his own "fuck you" to them. he acts like it's all a planned part of the show, and the audience indeed eats it up, some of them even asking when they can come see the show again bc "it's so daring! very unique! can't wait to see what you do next!" etc.

but. obviously this gets him in trouble. he's already depressed abt the show getting cancelled, trying hard to find some other place that'll host it (and hopefully for a cheaper price), moping in his dingy apartment, when he gets a call from that venue demanding he pays to fix whatever it is he vandalized or they'll take legal action. so now he's got more shit on his mind

through it all he's obviously very stressed, and when his friends (sigma and fyodor. obvs) try to visit him or call to check on him he's being very short and unpleasant, unable to keep up his upbeat persona

sigma is a bit tired of his shit. i imagine they won't be SUPER close in that universe? sigma is more like his previously close friend from college who somehow made it big and is now rich and busy and therefore has less time for this stuff. still, he offers to help with the money and legal end of things, but nikolai has to ask, and has to be courteous in whatever meetings sigma arranges for him

nikolai, ofc, does not take the offer, bc he doesn't wanna rely on handouts, let alone from his friends. also he has some trust issues and warped perception of what friendship is bc he's nikolai, and he doesn't wanna feel like he owes sigma in the future. he tells sigma he'll take more shifts in [insert job] and figure it out himself

fyodor doesn't mind his behavior too much, but does try to remain logical here and keeps giving nikolai advice on how to fix things which only makes him more upset.

he takes on more shifts, pulls out some money his parents gave him before he left home that he refused to touch, but it's still not quite enough to both make up for the cost of renting the venue, plus fixing it, plus his usual expenses. i think he will have a full on breakdown of some sort here ngl

(couldn't find a place to shove it but since i mentioned usual expenses here^ i imagine he'll start having issues with like. electricity/water/rent for his apartment and such, which will definitely not help his mental state to say the least)

i also feel like sigma might help him behind his back by paying for stuff secretly, bc even tho he's mad, they're still friends. when nikolai finds out he somehow loses his shit even more.

i do want it to have a happy ending tho. so. through his breakdown, nikolai starts writing, and comes up with a new show/new music, and it's really really good, and raw, and real. he doesn't do much with it yet, if it's music/a music based show he might record it, but that's it for now

however! also behind the scenes, fyodor figured out that giving that guy advice is a bit pointless. so instead, he did him a favor in his own way and uploaded footage of his last show - the one that got cancelled at the start - online, and it's a hit! nothing too mainstream, but the people who loved it originally are able to show it to more people, and by now it's gotten popular enough to actually make money

when he tells nikolai about this. he does not take it too well. "why did you do this?? i didn't ask you-" "i know. i didn't do it because you wanted me to. i did it because i thought it was the right thing to do. more people deserve to see your show, and you deserve to have your art seen by more people." and when he gives him some of the money it already made, "why are you giving this to me? is this your plan here? to make money off my work without even asking me?" "for christ's sake kolya, this is your money, your worked for it, all i did was post it for you. all i want here is so you get what you deserve for the work you put in, because i'm your friend." it's a very touching scene :P

eventually nikolai gets it, and he gets why sigma did what he did as well and meets up with him to thank him properly (i'm imagining it as like "let's meet up somewhere! my treat :)" "i'm gonna regret this aren't i" and then he takes sigma to some lame ass fast food place or cheap coffee spot, and sigma is not only touched by the gesture but makes a joke about how refreshing it is to go someplace like that after he got used to all the fancy places he usually has meetings in)

he releases his new stuff - online if it's music, or finding a new place to perform if it's a new show - and while they're still very niche, he develops somewhat of a cult following within other weird ass people, possibly even meeting new friends through that

so, things aren't perfect, but this way he feels like he can continue doing his own thing, and he even if he doesn't make a lot through it to be rich or w/e he can still at least keep his life running, and while he's still not 100% with it he also finds himself able to rely on his friends for help more and open up for others as well uwu

[zorkaya-moved]

" arguing with you is pointless once you've made up your mind. " from kaveh ofc because these two are bound to have debates <3

@avaere

He was correct. Kaveh knew better than to try and argue with Zarina when she made up her mind. It wasn’t because he was incorrect, no, it was simply because this woman had a frustrating way of dealing with arguments with others. Especially when they were close to her. There was no need for her to pretend to be hurt or to show an emotional reaction she didn’t feel. On the contrary, Sokolova’s gaze was cold and examining as if she was trying to understand exactly what Kaveh was thinking and feeling at the same time. Was his argument logical? Was it practical? Was it not clouded by a biased emotional mix? 

She was more insufferable than Alhaitham when it came to arguing. The Scribe would at least bring in a snarky word or two, bringing out more of Kaveh’s flame but Zarina remained too cold and too silent while listening. It so easily could be taken as her already repressing his views and ideas with this silent treatment, but she listened. If there was anything that the architect would know: she listened, but didn’t say anything until he finished saying everything he wanted to say. Or else, it’d be less pragmatic and it’d be a waste of time for both of them. A waste of time, breath, and emotional output. How cruel of her was to behave this way, but this was the reason why so many people simply refused to argue with her. However, unlike with those with those she didn’t care about, Zarina would infuriate them more and make them stumble on words while being lost in a fiery passionate desire to strangle her, the woman remained deathly silent at the words spoken by Kaveh. Only a watchful gaze and arms crossed under her chest were signifying her even paying attention. 

“Not exactly correct,” she denies him at that moment when she deems he’s done talking. Kaveh isn’t someone she will refuse to speak to or listen to, but there are instances where she believes her approach to be better for the sole reason of survival. Not logic, not rationality, not emotional aspect, and not a human aspect but simply because it provides more ability to survive and come out on top. “If you push for your viewpoint despite me disagreeing, I’m more likely to listen to you and give it some thought after the argument is done solely because it shows you care deeply about the subject. Others do not have this weight over my interests or my time.” Unlike you, they’re useless to me because they’re not my ‘chosen’ people.  

Truly, infuriating. The way she takes their current disagreement and debate as if it’s a mathematical equation where there is a higher percentage of who can win or lose. It’s not mathematics and it’s not any calculations. This is a human interaction, but Sokolova is a provocateur and a person who reads others like books. For worse, sadly.  

“However, I do agree that my approach is infuriating to someone like you who cares deeply about the effect your decision may have on others. You don’t play chess while seeing each living person in each chess piece. In moments like these when the stress is overpowering,” she thinks for a moment about Sages and how easily the greediest ones caved into her planning. Not something anyone needs to know. “It’s better to step back and let the situation unfold, no matter how cruel the aftereffects may be. I know you are aware of all consequences, but even then, I cannot jump head first on this matter.” 

Just because he cares doesn’t mean she does. Then again, he doesn’t need to know that right now, as they are only having a debate. 

“I want to hear more about your side of the arguments. The reason why you are getting so invested in this case: Is it a personal affiliation or is it something that you cannot ignore yourself?” She leans back against the couch, her shoulders relaxing and her legs crossed. “I’m not getting involved until you explain to me how it touches you or how it will benefit me. As you know, I cannot give my time to just anyone... especially if it means putting you in a dangerous situation.”

Perhaps, he was really right and in this moment there was no way fo changing her mind. At least, she wasn't walking out and leaving him alone with his thoughts. The thought crossed her mind, but she decided against it for this time.

[faintvibes]

HISTORIC ART STUFF WOO

In true procrastination fashion, I have picked up drawing historical Hetalia in the midst of deadlines- but take some images anyway? I've got another 4 waiting to be finished, but I'm posting these now in the hopes that I'll switch focus to better things before I pick up the remaining images... (hopefully)

If you're interested in my process through creating these, I have more information on my thoughts, references, etc under the cut! :)

So first (and ironically the most recently completed one): America. I was going to draw this lad in more masculine clothing, but I was flipping through one of my reference books and found a look I thought was absolutely stunning, so ofc I had to use it. My justification is the hc that he crossdressed to hide from British forces/representatives (depsite the image used being dated to the 1710s). Speaking of...

This is taken from a book in the World of Art series by James Laver: "Costume and Fashion". This specific image can be found on page 129 and is captioned (visible at top of image) "Studies of three women, Jean-Antoine Watteau c. 1716-17". The lady on the left has the outfit that caught my eye, while the one in the middle is who I took inspiration from in regards to hairstyle. I found it fascinating to see the differences in fashion between classes- the same basic structures, but the left woman's stays are on full display, held in place by a simple ribbon. And her stays don't show a hint of decoration, unlike many from the time. Certainly not something the other two would be caught dead wearing, but I quite like it.

Since the image has little colour, I was free to play with my own ideas (though I likely would have anyway). Since my excuse was that this is during the revolution, I figured linking back to the American flag would be a neat touch- hence the blue skirt and white ribbon (not exactly the shades used, but I didn't think of that at the time). You might notice that red's missing from the equation, which I decided on due to the famous redcoats of the British army at the time. I thought about using a red-brown for the stays, but I liked the brown I settled on and figured that probably wouldn't have been the most common colour on the cheap anyway. However, the white of the ribbons is ever-so-slightly red, and I used a grey-red colour to shade it. That detail is meant to be rather subtle however, as I imagine America wouldn't have wanted to use anything red as a disguise at the time. The green top might seem a bit out of place following that logic, however I had a different idea when it came to that. Originally I thought of green because of how it worked well with blue and brown, but a recent (ongoing) project involved me researching meaning by the colour, so its association with growth and renewal seemed fitting for the whole revolution plot. Though, it could also like to the green fields and rolling hills you can find in the east coast- the ground on which the revolution was fought.

The background colour isn't so thought out- I just picked one that didn't take away from the main image.

Now next we have Prussia, who's dressed in a formal suit from the 1820s- specifically, 1829- as seen in the reference photo I used:

This is from "A History of Fashion: From Loincloths to Lycra", written by Jacqueline Moray, created and designed by David Salariya- with a small team backing them up. It's incredibly detailed, and each page features small images of people across each time period discussed (one of which I've used for my reference) which helps with variety of dress. I do have to note, however, its lack of poc representation- with figures of any skin colour other than white only displayed in the Ancient Egyptian section and from the 1920s onwards. Furthermore, a crayon-like texture is apparent on darker skin tones- for no apparent reason. I'm not normally one to call attention to limited representation in these sorts of books- it's incredibly frustrating, but I get the thought process of "European/western fashion, European [looking] people" but the fact that they begin to appear after a time and the weird texture is... highly suspect.

But none of that relates to Prussia! This figure (the middle one, in the turquoise coat) can be found on page 24 of the book, and I've taken the outfit practically verbatim- minus some changes in colouring. I kept the shoes, under suit (under under suit?) and socks, with my changes originally going to be a grey/red colour theme... before I remembered that Prussian Blue exists. My whole idea I had going into this drawing was the sort of obnoxious peacocking that feels very on-brand for Prussia, and using a colour literally named after him sounded perfect. I decided to make that the overcoat's main colour, with a smidge of red around the vest collar to contrast it. Apart from that, I kept the grey and detailed with various buttons, primarily gold in colouring (with an exception for the larger ones on the overcoat, which are a darker blue).

Additionally, you may notice that he is blushing in the drawing I've done. There is no special meaning to this, other than that I'd noticed- while browsing images of him in order to reference features- images that appeared to be official/from the manga (I was just scrolling, and so didn't double-check) often depicted him with a bit of blush along the edge of his cheeks. Frankly, that's adorable and I had to include it.

And the last we have is New Zealand- or, my interpretation (one of). As I've stated previously (buried in the tags of an earlier post, good luck finding it) I have always thought of feminine/female, in part due to the lack of such representation in the Hetalia canon. Admittedly, though, my decision is influenced by my own gender identity and a want to relate to the character that represents my country. I alter the appearance of my country from their canon counterpart mainly due to a lack of satisfaction with what there is in canon for Aotearoa (and this is not something that just applies to my country, but it is the strongest in this instance) and the feeling that the character I see for my country doesn't represent the one I know. Though it's important to mention that how I choose to represent my country isn't static- it often changes, and you'll likely not see the same two NZs ever in my art, (unless it's an instance like my oc Kima, who was originally an interpretation of my country but was roped into another project and became individual in her own right. I draw her a lot, and her appearance is static, though I doubt she'll appear often on this blog.)

With that out of the way... I had two main reference images for Aotearoa, both taken from "Dressed: Fashionable Dress in Aotearoa New Zealand 1840 to 1910" by Claire Regnault which, by the way, is the best resource I have ever come across for early NZ fashion, and- while approaching the topic largely from the perspective of colonists- details how both Pākehā and Māori clothing evolved.

Both are illustrations by George Angus, the former (page 27) is taken from his book "The New Zealanders Illustrated" which covers how Māori dress changed due to colonisation, which was published in 1847. The latter (page 49) is a painting by him of Toenga (a hine of Ngāti Maru), depicting her in a traditional (though, slightly modernised) harakeke kākahu (flax cloak) as well as a European-style hat he describes as very fashionable among the Māori women of Auckland at the time. While I haven't incorporated the hat into my illustration, I have taken the cloak and red balls of fabric used- a detail Māori weavers began to incorporate upon trade with Europeans- though not the further red lines, since I have limited experience with illustrating this sort of garment. I've taken inspiration from Toenga's pose as well, particularly with how she holds her kākahu to slightly disguise her face (though NZ barely does). As for the other reference, I focused mostly on the hair textures and skin tones depicted to gain an idea of what I wanted this NZ to look like. While Māori hair remains most commonly black or very dark in colour (in my personal experience), I went for a very clear brown tone to call into her Pākehā links. I also initially went for a darker skin tone, but ended up choosing a lighter one for this reason. I additionally considered making her eye colour more noticeably European (e.g. blue, green) instead of brown, but ultimately decided against it, limiting myself to a lighter brown colour. At this point in her history I headcanon her as being primarily linked with her indigenous population, but she isn't absent of European heritage. As colonists begin to take more from her, I can see her becoming more westernised- but that is not yet something she has largely faced (key word being largely).

For similar reasons, I wanted her to have a tā moko tattoo. I am no expert in this art- my knowledge is limited primarily to the placing of the tā moko on the body in different instances and some of the common patterns- so I also sought out a reference for this. I used the book "Tangata Whenua: An Illustrated History" by Atholl Anderson, Judith Binney, and Aroha Harris. It is a goldmine of Māori history (as the title may suggest) and features many depictions of Māori people and events- this time from a primarily Māori perspective. The individual whose moko I referenced is pictured on the front cover, but is discussed in more detail on page 483:

Since I've taken taken my depiction from an actual person's moko, I cannot apply any special meaning relative to NZ apart from the cultural significance of the tattoo: the passage into adulthood, traditionally, though it can differ in the modern age. Internally, I warred with myself over distancing the design I have used from my reference more- after all, every moko is unique to the individual and the last thing I want to do is step on someone's cultural identity- but I am hesitant to do so. I am not greatly knowledgeable about tā moko and I can't help but feel as though I may be making a greater misstep in altering the design myself.

I did, initally, have another image to add here- I'd drawn an image of Canada in the following outfit (page 21 of the same book I referenced for Prussia):

But I wasn't fond (at all) of the pose I used upon finishing it, nor my attempts at the intricate detailing. But if you're interested, the idea behind the image was a bit different to the others. This is the sort of suit a French nobleman might wear in the 1790s- quite a while after Canada became British territory, though I'd been interested in the thought of him looking quite out of place dressed so fancily. So my idea ended up being France (kidnapping him?) deciding to loop Canada into a day of "nostalgia", bringing out old outfits and convincing his old colony to put one of them on. As such, I added a few more modern details to hint at this reality- painted fingernails, for one, and Canada's hair wasn't a wig, but his own styled in a small ponytail (with the ribbon). I may redo it eventually seeing as I was fond of the premise, but I had another idea for a Canada image that will be released whenever I finish the second set. This one was originally a vague notion of Nyo!Canada (her design is adorable) but I wanted this one to draw more from Inuit roots, and so her design will reflect that. Not really recognisable as canon Canada, but a Canada nonetheless.

Apart from that Canada, the other designs I have sketched but on hold are the following:

France, in the clothes of a Norman nobleman from the 1150s- looking slightly older than the young France depicted in Hetalia canon but with a noticeably innocent expression

Germany, looking very unimpressed in a wedding dress dated to 1878 (modern Germany, old wedding dress)

A joint depiction of Nyo!North Italy and Nyo!Germany with slight GerIta, which can be dated to sometime from 1910 to the 1920s, though more likely the 20s than the 10s (look, I had two dresses slightly different time periods, and an idea)

And if you've made it this far through my very long-winded explanation about these drawings that each hold a little bit of my soul, I applaud you and am very (very) thankful. Please feel open to discuss further with if you'd like- I value every second you spend entertaining my thoughts :))