#i have engie's done so far!

[mxboxlocks]

INTRUDER ALERT!

alt below!

[sentrysapper]

Engie lifting up spy with both arms pretty please and thank you?? There so adorable

I was not entirely sure in which way you meant this, so I decided to make Two versions. :3

version 2 under the cut...

[ballad-of-birdy-lamb]

Saw your post about TF2 being added to your list so here I am 🙏 I would like the one and only bed sharing trope with gender neutral reader, with heavy (my bbg) sniper, engie, and scout 💚 thank you ❗

Intertwined, sewn together.

Heavy/Sniper/Engineer/Scout x Gender Neutral! Reader separate romantic headcanons Summary: The hotel you were staying at with the mercs accidentally gave you a one bed hotel room. Warnings: probably OOC :( Word count: 1.1k ⋆｡°•☁︎

Heavy:

He’s very calm when it comes to sharing a bed since he’s done so with his family and you will be his lover someday, so he’s ready to get used to sharing a bed with you.

Heavy isn’t nervous about it since he thinks of it as simple and just job related but can’t deny the fact, he’s a little smug about spending sleeping time in the same bed.

By far easiest to sleep in the same bed with but he’s a furnace and huge. He’ll warm the bed like it’s electrical and keep you close, whether that be because of you or him wanting to be near or his size. It has got to do with living in the cold Russian mountains his entire life, he’s so used to the cold he never realizes how much heat he radiates.

You better hope the bed is big, Sasha’s going to sleep on the bed too, like a baby.

“Sasha will sleep in bed too, no changes from home.”

Heavy is a quiet and deep sleeper, more likely will not notice when you (eventually) fall off the bed from his size and Sasha. The harsh snow and windstorms have made him a deep sleeper.

He’s not the type to be insanely cuddly while asleep since he likes personal space. It’s an effect of growing up in a lonely Russian mountain and more likely having to share rooms/beds with his sisters. He needs personal space and likes it. But he likes you too, so you can be an exception.

If it’s exceptionally cold, he’ll (sadly) move Sasha to let you sleep against him for extra warmth, it’s not like the hotel is of good quality so it’s likely to happen. Heavy has a good time when that happens since he likes knowing you’re doing it on your own, not being forced by him and it gives him a reason to think you like him more.

Sniper:

He’ll act like it’s not a big deal when you’re given a room with only one bed, and it’s true, he doesn’t view it as a big deal. He’s sharing a bed with you. You! It’s when it reaches a basic time to go to bed does it sink in.

He probably has to be forced to sleep in a bed since he’s grown so used to sleeping in chairs for his job, having to be up quickly has its disadvantages. His back hurts from laying horizontally sometimes since he’s so accustomed to stools.

It’s not a particularly great experience for him or you sleeping in the same bed, especially since he views you as more than a friend. Sniper will be so stiff when lying next to you, it's insane, sheet metal build the entire night.

He wakes up so many times in the night to go to the bathroom, it’s insane. You have to be a deep ass sleeper to not wake from it every twenty minutes (at least).

While he’s stiff lying next to you from anxiety, he’ll quietly admire you. It’ll just be looking over your sleeping face. He’s a sniper of all things, he’s good with detail and he’ll find every little thing about you. The way your eyelashes tilt, the softness of your lips, and the basic movements and sounds you make while you sleep.

If you’re the cuddly type while you sleep, he’ll be ten times stiffer and won’t know what to do but will just get used to it throughout the night. Sniper won’t try wrapping his arms around you until he feels too tired to care. But after that he’ll hold you real tightly.

Engineer:

Honestly, one of the easier to be around when sleeping in the same bed, he’s very vocal about wanting your comfort, not just because it’s a basic thing to do, but because he genuinely wants you to be comfortable. He likes you and doesn’t want you running off because you possibly find him creepy.

Engineer’s still got that southern charm when it comes to this specific event since he is very intent on your willingness to do anything beyond platonic. If you suggest sleeping on the floor, he’ll encourage sleeping in the same bed.

“It’s just a bed, it’s not like anything more will happen anyway. It’s better anyway for your back.”

He is so similar to Sniper since he rarely gets to his bed to sleep, he’ll just end up sleeping somewhere random in his shop, which is why he has extra blankets in there. But now, he’s more inclined to be in bed.

He sleeps like a dad, snoring and stuff, possibly CPAP worthy but leave that to Medic to figure out. He doesn’t move too much though, just occasionally shifting in his sleep but it’s comfortable enough.

He’s very soft and you can accidentally move to cuddle him. Engineer would wake up suddenly in the night, looking over at you instinctively to see if you’re alright and would find you pressed into his side. He’d smile about it, in a smug kind of way but genuine happiness since you feel comfortable doing such a thing with him.

Scout:

When you got to the hotel and found out there was a mistake and you needed to share a bed, he was so excited. He’s been showing off so much for you.

He’s the most prominent in acting like sharing a bed isn’t eating him alive. Scout’s insanely confident but it’s not something he’s done with someone he’s liked before. He’s beyond giddy to be fair.

It wouldn’t be too surprising if he’s used to sleeping in a bed with other people, not because he gets play ever, but because he’s used to sharing beds with his siblings. He knows how squished together he needs to be to not be swung at for being too close to someone while sleeping.

“Don’t worry, there will be enough room on the bed for you even with me and my huge muscles.”

Just before you’re ready to go to bed, he’ll go into the hotel room's bathroom and hype himself up. Ok, someone hot is in his bed, which means good stuff because you’re hot and in the same bed as him!

At the same time, he’s sweating buckets. Scout is nervous because he’s asked if you’d ever want to sleep in the same bed as him and now it’s happening! You’re so close and your skin seems so soft, and you smell so nice and you’re so nice!

He kicks in his sleep, aggressively too. He’s like a dog that runs in its dream and does it physically too.

Scout will hold your hand when he randomly wakes in the middle of the night, it’s the farthest he’ll go because he would want you conscious when he gives you kisses. He wants you to remember how awesome a kiss would be from him!

⋆｡°•☁︎

Insanely OOC but first TF2 request!! Thank you so much for requesting!!

My tf2 masterlist

[papil0nglegs]

What about the mercs with a fem SO that talks in brainrot sometimes? Would really want medic in there but it's up to you!

Mercs x Brainrot!Reader

A/n: WHY IS THE TF2 FANDOM SO OBSESSED WITH THIS IDEA? 😭 I SAW ANOTHER FIC ABT THIS AND TWO REQUESTS ASKING FOR THIS PLS

warnings: Brainrot.. a lot of images being used, it’s a shit post who cares tbh

Scout

He’s into it too

Guys it’s scout

“Scout ilysm ur so nonchalant <33”

“Thanks babe ^^ I know I’m pretty alpha”

(Oh btw the alpha thing isn’t a joke he unironically listens to alpha male podcasts)

In the middle of spy’s serious moments you’d both lip sync ‘you are my sunshine’ to each other when he’s not looking

“what the bloody hell are you guys doing..”

“…perhaps itz a coping mechanizm zince scout doesn’t have a father?”

Medic really had to take it there

The ‘fatherless child’ meme was a coping mechanism for him tho

“I’m a fatherless child, of course I have abandonment issues”

“Um babe? Idk if you should joke abt that 😚”

“Na it just makes me more sigma”

You guys love to fuck with the blu team sm with your shenanigans, esp sniper!!

Scout would have his bat and you would have whatever weapon you have with you and yell “skibidi” before jumping him

Here’s something he DEFINITELY didn’t learn from you 💯

creds to urwhouchoose2b on Tik tok

Engineer

He tries so hard to understand

Whenever you show him a meme he does the classic old person holding phone away from eyes thing

Yk the

“Ok so this is the ‘im nothing like y’all’ fish”

“alrighty, and this is..?”

“Oh that’s the Freddy five bear meme, see it’s funny cuz his name is actually ‘Freddy fazbear’ but they got his name wrong so like.. yeah”

“…I’m not sure what I’m ‘posed to say ‘bout this, but I think you belong in a looney bin”

Once he had a project that had the word “alpha” in it and he hated mentioning it to you cuz yk

“giggle”

“…what?”

“Skibidi alpha”

“What??”

Demo man

HE LOVES IT LMFAOO

he’s so energetic esp when he’s drunk so he’s happy to have someone he can share that energy with

Y’all know that “Scotland forever” meme

Well you screamed it after another victory as a joke, but when demo heard it he was confused but also excited?

“SCOTLAND FOREVAA”

“OH? ALRIGHT THEN, SCOTLAND FOREVER 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿”

cut to him butt chugging beers

Demo doesn’t get it but he has the spirit

He’ll be right there replicating the TikTok audios after taking the point

Dude is drunk 99% of the time so he’s never bothered to ask what any of this means, he’s just in it for the fun

Once you dragged him to the bathroom since he drake too many beers (shocker) but he didn’t want to do it in the toilet cuz he didn’t want to ‘hurt his dear skibidi’

“Cmon demo you have to puke it out!!”

“Noo, take me to the jawbox I don’t wanna hert me skibidi toilet”

“Oh god what have I done”

I think you rotted his brain a little too much

Spy

Don’t even get him started.

He’s so sick of your antics it’s not even funny

“Guys we all have to remember that it’s not about the money.. it’s about the skibidi.”

Passionately grabs spy’s shoulder

“How have you made it this far in life”

Unlike engie, he really doesn’t want to know about it

Especially during missions

“lol spy you’re so devious ASF”

“shhh, enough blabbering!!”

“You are not carti 😶‍🌫️😶‍🌫️❌‼️‼️‼️”

You make fun of him a bunch, he can’t think of a single moment where you took him seriously

“Y/n get off the cart!!”

“If we were in Fortnite I’d have higher ground + double pump.”

[jevilowo]

Not sure if ive already done this. But.

Predictions for COMIC 7

CHARLES DARLING WILL BE THE FINAL ENEMY besides Helen. Trust me on this one I swear they wouldn't have brought him in if they didn't have plans. ALSO the mother of the Mann triplets (Bette Mann neé Darling) was RELATED TO HIM HE'S RELEVANT. I'm so convinced he's the one Helen made a deal with and he's going to make a grab for Mann Co.

We'll get to see Bilious Hale in a flashback and find out what happened to him. Bilious Hale, oh guy who punched coal out of mines and sat on John Wilkes Booth while other people shot at him, my beloved. I hope they don't reveal he was a bad father or anything.

A woman is nice to Ms Pauling for once and she gets a smooch. She deserves it. Hopefully it won't be a smooch from Helen (DAMN YOU 4CHAN LEAKS), the old lady's had her hired since Pauling was in her mid teens.

WE GET HORSEMANN LORE! this is just wishful thinking on my part the Horsemann makes me insane. Shout out to Silas Mann fr. If he doesn't show up, I hope they at least acknowledge or reference him. I swear they had plans for him back in 2010. Which they then immediately abandoned in favour of developing Mann vs Machine.

Spydad reveal. Pretty much a given. No need to elaborate. I hope Scout’s mother shows up I love her.

Demo gets something important to do! He's only been there for comedic bits so far really, so I think he deserves some Serious Plot Stuff.

Build up to and cop out on Pyro face reveal. The whole thing of Pyro's character is the mystery, so I think the funniest way to go about a face reveal would be for us to only see the team's reactions and have them all react very differently e.g. Scout vomits, Demo gives them the thumbs up, Spy starts taking horrified notes, Engie looks vaguely lovestruck, Saxton Hale expresses annoyance that they aren't actually *insert obsucure species of something here* like he thought.

CONAGHER LORE!! By which I mean Engie shows up and has a chat with Fred about Radigan and immortality and whatnot. Fred has to have been spared from the bloodshed for a reason, right?

Classic Medic shows up! Or they confirm he is dead. Or they confirm he is Pyro which is a funny theory I read once but sincerely doubt. Maybe they'll pull a Bea and have him have been a girl the whole time.

I have a crackpot theory that Helen/Elizabeth is actually Bette Mann (again, mother of the Mann triplets), and while it's unlikely to be true, it would genuinely be so funny if I'm right so WATCH THIS SPACE. My main reasoning is Helen started her Australium search the year the triplets were born, aka the year Bette DIED, and also Bette is a nickname for Elizabeth. Also also it adds to my theory that she will team up with Charles Darling, who is, as I've already said, related to Bette.

Olivia gets to do something important also. Saying this bc she's mostly been a prop so far. I'm manifesting a sideplot where she summons the Horsemann to beat up Charles Darling for her.

Merasmus returns! Last we saw he was arrested, but Jay Pinkerton really likes his Soldier/Merasmus interactions so chances of him coming back are high.

There will be a joke like "geez it feels like it's been seven years since we beat grey mann" and a panel where everyone just lets that process before going back to plot stuff

Chances are, a new comic after so many years means there will be new writers, and the fandom has changed quite a bit since the last one. There will be SUBLIMINAL SPEEDING BULLET SHIPPING. There will be MORE FOCUS THAN IS REALLY NECESSARY on Scout. SOMEONE WILL THEY/THEM PYRO which sounds great actually you know what I forgot where I was going with this godspeed.

ZHANNASOLDIER WEDDING FINALE!!!

[ladykailitha]

Grief (A Friend Indeed) Part 10

Just two more chapters to go and then this little story is done. I'm glad I wrote it. It was very cathartic for me. I hope it brought some comfort to you too.

Here we find out who Steve has been grieving this whole time and that Eddie mourned them too.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

****

Steve was quiet and contemplative on the trip back. And Eddie let him be. That was quite the roller coaster of emotion he had gone through and he knew Steve needed time to sort out all of his thoughts and feelings.

As they neared Ashland, Eddie asked, “Are you okay? It got pretty heavy back there.”

“Sorry,” Steve murmured.

“I wasn’t asking for forgiveness,” Eddie admonished gently. “I was asking if you were okay.”

Steve sighed. “I guess I just had so many things bottled up that it all came out in a rush.”

“So talk to me,” Eddie said softly. “I know you think you can’t talk to anyone else because they’re all younger than you. But I’m not. So spill.”

Steve let out a long shuddering breath as if he had been holding it in for years.

“It’s just there have only ever been two adults involved in the whole Upside Down shit,” Steve murmured. “Well, there have been others, but either they haven’t been trustworthy or they’ve died. And I’m not going to lie and say I’m not bitter about Mrs Byers taking her family out to California and leaving me as the remaining adult.”

“Oh shit,” Eddie said softly. He hadn’t even thought about that. “That wasn’t right. I get she was trying to get Will and El as far away from Hawkins as she could, but considering the frequency of the U.D. coming back, it does seem selfish when looked at from your point of view.”

“El wasn’t the only one grieving Hopper’s death,” Steve spat out. “Why were only her feelings taken into consideration? Why was his funeral ‘a private family’ affair instead of one benefiting a hero where the whole town could attend? Why was El the first one that got to see him? Why did it take days before anyone else was informed?”

Eddie saw a shoulder and pulled off onto it, the Bimmer crunching the gravel as it slowed to a stop.

“It must have been so hard on you,” Eddie murmured. “You mentioned back at the diner that he always looked out for you and then suddenly he was gone and no one thought to ask you if you needed time to grieve, right?”

Steve nodded. “I just felt so stupid after it was announced that he was alive, you know? Like how dare I mourn someone who hadn’t even died. But I thought that once everything settled down we would get a chance to talk, but nope. He went off to California with the Byers. They’re supposed all be back before school starts, but who knows if that’s even true.”

“Steve it isn’t stupid you grieved,” Eddie murmured. “But I bet if you told him what you’ve been feeling, he’d pretty upset that he hurt you like that.”

Tears started streaming down Steve’s face. “I just want to be loved as much I love them, is that really too much to ask for?”

Eddie unbuckled his seatbelt and pulled him in for a hug. “Of course it’s not. And I don’t doubt if you stopped to really think about it you can name at least a half a dozen people who love you as much as you love them.”

Steve let out a watery chuckle. “I could probably fill up all ten of my fingers, if I was honest to myself.”

Eddie wiped away his tears. “There you have it, big boy. But it’s okay to cry and if you feel like you need to fall apart, call me. I’ll come over with beer, weed, and bad horror films to mock until you laugh.”

Steve wiped his nose on his arm. “You promise?”

Eddie leaned back far enough to hold up his pinkie. “I pinkie promise.”

Steve hooked his finger around Eddie’s and shook on it.

“You ready to face the road again?” Eddie asked.

Steve nodded. After a moment or two of silence, he spoke up. “You remember when ‘fake’ cried for Keith?” He used his fingers around the word fake to put it into air quotes.

Eddie, who was about to pull into traffic again, cut the engine. “Holy shit. It was Hopper, wasn’t it? That’s who you were remembering.”

Steve nodded. “It’s easy to cry when thinking about him, you know?”

“Because it’s new and even though he’s not dead, you never got your resolution?”

Steve nodded again. “I just feel so selfish about the whole thing, you know. He wasn’t my dad. I wasn’t related to him in anyway. But I thought I meant something to him, you know?”

Eddie turned the car back on and eased into traffic. “I’m sure you meant a lot to him, but there could be extenuating circumstances that prevented him from expressing that. Like I said before, I bet if you told him how you felt he’d be gutted.”

Steve just shrugged.

Eddie glanced over at him and then back at the road. “You tell anyone about this and I’ll tell Dustin about the time you flirted with his mom to get the brownie recipe.”

Steve’s went wide. “That was not flirting! I was just buttering her up a bit. That’s not the same thing.”

“Oh I know that,” Eddie said with a grin. “But would Dustin know the difference?”

Steve thought about it for a moment. “You drive a hard bargain, Lord Eddie.”

Eddie giggled. “You know, sometimes I forget you like ‘Star Wars’, you just aren’t great with their titles.”

“The third one is my favorite, after all.”

Eddie cleared his throat. “So back when I was just little metalhead, dealing for the first time one of my best customers was the Chief.”

Steve blinked. “Oh wait, I think I did hear something about that. I’m surprised he wasn’t fired.”

Eddie shrugged. “He wasn’t up for re-election. Sheriffs are elected. And small town like Hawkins, change is difficult. Hop would have to straight up murder babies in town hall and smear their blood over the church walls to get people to not vote for him.”

Steve snorted. “I doubt even then. It would take him being soft on homosexuals before they ousted him.”

Eddie laughed. “You’ve got me there.”

Steve smiled at him.

“So,” Eddie continued, “the reason I bring it up is that despite what people think, I’ve never been arrested for dealing and Rick hadn’t either until Hop ‘died’.”

Steve straightened up in his seat. “What do you mean?”

“Hop always said it was better to steer Rick away from certain places because he could,” Eddie said, “then it was to arrest him and have an all out war with the new supplier.”

Steve’s eyes went wide. “That’s why Rick didn’t get arrested until Powell took over because he didn’t have the same philosophy that Hop did.”

“Right in one,” he said. “And it did get bad with people trying to fill the void he left behind. Uncle Wayne convinced to stop selling once I was out until Rick was released because I couldn’t trust the new suppliers not to cut their shit with something dangerous.”

“Holy shit, yeah,” Steve agreed. “So why are you telling me this?”

“Because Hop looked out for me, too,” Eddie said. “Especially when my old man rolled into town. He would make sure he got to the carnage first and made sure I never got a record.”

Steve scratched his cheek thoughtfully. “That makes since I always wondered why the police or Jason never brought up your arrest record. It’s because Hop made sure you never got one.”

“So this is me saying,” Eddie finished, “I get it. I get mourning him. Because in my own way I mourned him, too. Because between Hop and Uncle Wayne they made sure I could get out of Hawkins when the time came.”

“This is exactly why I pushed for a public funeral,” Steve grumbled, sinking back into his seat and crossing his arms. “I don’t know who had the final say on that, but it makes me mad that just because they didn’t have a body people in town wouldn’t want to come see anyway. It blows.”

“Here’s that,” Eddie agreed.

Too soon they were pulling up the Nelsons’ and the sun was starting to set.

By silent agreement they both got out of the car and sat on Steve’s hood to watch the sunset in a beautiful array of blues and purples until the sky darkened and the stars came out.

“Thank you for today,” Steve murmured. “For all of it. Getting me out here, taking me to my grandmother’s grave, sitting with me when I talked to Uncle Percy. Helping me with my grief even though yours is far more fresh and painful than mine.”

“Grief is grief, Stevie,” Eddie murmured. “You don’t get to decide when it heals over. You were there for me when my dad showed up, so I was more than happy to return the favor with your family.”

“Thanks, man,” Steve said.

“So...” Eddie said. “You want to tell me why you and your uncle weren’t keen to let your other uncle see you?”

Steve snorted. “He’s the one that was the most against my mom getting any kind of inheritance. He didn’t think she should have gotten anything because she was a girl child. He kept saying that she got her money in the form of the lavish wedding she had when she married my dad.”

He ran his fingers through his hair.

“He’s sued her at least three times that I know of. If he had seen me he would have started screaming about how my mom didn’t deserve that money and that I was just as complicit in its ‘theft’ as she was.”

“But he got the house or whatever it was, right?” Eddie asked.

He nodded. “Yeah and the two acres of land it sits on. If he were to sell it would go for at least a few million, easy.”

“I’ll bet,” Eddie said, whistling long and low. “Which means Percy got the business?”

“Which another thing that upset Uncle Jasper,” Steve said. “But Uncle Percy is the oldest and had the best business sense, but he can’t let it go that he thinks his siblings got the better deal.”

“I heard this quote once about how some people are content in life, but that others just can’t be. That they will always seek more. Nothing will ever be enough.”

“Uncle Jasper is definitely one of those.”

Penny poked her head out the front door. “Come on in, boys, it’s really getting late.”

Eddie and Steve stood up and walked back into the house, feeling lighter then they had since before March.

****

Pt 11|Pt 12

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @messrs-weasley @goodolefashionedloverboi @maya-custodios-dionach @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @emly03 @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @bookworm0690 @itsall-taken @bookbinderbitch @redfreckledwolf @vecnuthy @littlewildflowerkitten @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @gutterflower77 @genderless-spoon @hel-spawn @ellietheasexylibrarian @anne-bennett-cosplayer @mamafaithful @yikes-a-bee @dragonmama76 @flaming-reauxster @r0binscript @awkotaco24 @ilikeititspretty

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

Random TF2 headcanons bc it has me in a chokehold.

These are set in 2023 bc I want to write these silly geese in present-day situations. (Still haven't gotten into the lore.)

————————————————————

None of these fuckers like the same fastfood restaurants, they always disagree.

Heavy likes Jimmy Jon's.

Medic likes Subway, he thinks it's the healthier option (don't tell him the bread can legally be considered cake)

Scout likes Wendy's. Sniper pretends to like McDonald's just to mess with him. He really doesn't like fast food at all.

Demo likes Culver's

Spy hates fast food and has never eaten at places like that. He's too good for that (this is a lie. He frequently goes to Starbucks).

Soldier loves KFC with a passion.

Engie likes Popeyes.

Pyro doesn't eat. They guzzle pen ink and glitter glue.

————————————————————

These old men can not use Gen Z slang to save their lives. However, Scout is horrendous with slang, He has called himself the rizzler. You will not go a day without him saying, "Take the L." This man is menace.

Medic used the word "Rizz" once and Scout almost threw up.

————————————————————

Engineer loves Legos! He has every adult set. He's done the vespa, he's done the bonsai tree, and any others you can think of. He also buys the small kids sets for Pyro. They do it together for fun.

————————————————————

Medic. Loves. To. Talk. Shit.

This man is loyal to no one. Show up to the lab with food and wine, and by the end of the night, you'll have dirt on anyone and everyone. Archimedes loves to listen in while he rants and raves.

————————————————————

Speaking of Medic, whoever headcannoned him as a guy who acts like a teenage girl was 100% correct. This man has a playlist for surgery that's all Kesha, MARINA, Gwen Stefani, and Britney Spears. This man has neon glitter pens and has a fuzzy pink diary (that's where he keeps everyone's secrets!). Man's says "teehee" and kicks his legs. He has a canopy bed and string lights in his room. (And I love him for it 🫶🏻)

————————————————————

All of them are mentally ill in someway.

Heavy, Demo, and Engie have anxiety, but manage it well enough for it not to be a problem. (Demo just happens to manage with alcohol 😮‍💨)

Scout has ADHD and depression.

Sniper and Soldier have Autism

Spy has depression, and also body dysmorphia.

Medic has autismn, insomnia, and BPD

Pyro has schizophrenia and autism

————————————————————

Sniper loves animals. Like, let's be for real animals are his hyperfixation. He has a special camera that can take pictures of animals from far away. He loves the fact that he can use his skills as a sniper to photograph animals.

————————————————————

Spy can't recognize his own face unless he has his mask. His face seems to distort in the mirror after a few minutes. His mask keeps his features in place so it doesn't get a blurry and muddled.

————————————————————

Demo knits! His mom taught him when he was younger. He has a blanket his mom started and he finished in his room.

————————————————————

Might make more who knows :)

Love this game and the fandom sm rn.

[meiliarotten]

Team Fortress 2 Kinktober Time Two: Electric Boogaloo

Day 7: Mechanical Intervention (Overstimulation)

🔞MINORS DNI🔞

Pairings: Engineer x Fem!Reader

Summary: Engie keeps going to bed late in the night and decided to make sure you don’t feel neglected.

Tags: Overstimulation, inappropriate use of the Gunslinger, vibrators

Word Count: 2.7k

The Masterlist

The oversized shirt you wore to bed was far more important to you than most would think. Having once belonged to Dell, you had ‘borrowed’ it from his half of the dresser one night when you happened to forget to do your laundry. Now it was an item of comfort for you. It made you feel like he was here with you, even though the two of you had been apart for so long.

You rolled your eyes, realizing for a moment how melodramatic you were being. It wasn’t like Engie had gone off to war. In fact, he was literally under the same roof as you, just a few rooms away in his workshop. However he had been holed up in there for so many nights now, working tirelessly on his sentries and dispensers, writing calculation after calculation, all of which you had no hope of understanding. To put it frankly, you missed him.

With a sigh, you opened the door of your shared room, glancing down the hall towards the workshop. You could see the light shining from under the crack in the door, indicating that he was still hard at work. You began to walk towards that light, unsure of what your goal was exactly. It wasn’t likely, but maybe you could convince him to turn in early for once. At the very least, it would be nice to pay him a visit.

You opened the door to the workshop slowly, finding Engie sitting in a chair, hunched over some blueprints with a half disassembled sentry at his side. It was a position you had found him in many times before. It was a wonder how his back wasn’t in constant pain. You walked up behind him, not realizing how quiet you had been until you wrapped your arms around Engie’s shoulders, only for him to jump before realizing that it was just you.

“Good lord, darlin,’ don’t sneak up on me like that!” he said, holding a hand to his chest. Engie was always weary about being approached from behind, especially with how often he was the victim of spies on the battlefield. That fact had apparently slipped your mind.

“Sorry,” you sighed, nestling your face against his shoulder. “I didn't mean to startle you.”

“What’s wrong?” Engie asked, noticing the twinge of sadness in your voice. “Aren’t you usually in bed by now?”

You held onto him tighter, biting your lip. Eventually, you decided not to hesitate and simply come out with it. “Come back to bed.” You could tell by the sigh you got in response that you weren’t going to get the answer you were hoping for.

“I’m sorry darlin.’ You know I have to get my work done first.”

You walked around to face Engie, giving the best damn puppy dog eyes you could muster. You weren’t too proud to beg. “Please, Dell?”

His eyes lit up at the use of his real name, softening as he reached out and pulled you close. “Oh honey, I’ve been neglecting you, haven’t I?” he asked. You nodded, letting yourself be pulled into Engie’s lap. “You sweet thing.”

He leaned in to kiss you. You eagerly reciprocated, desperate for the sensation of his lips against yours. It was more than the two of you had shared in at least a week, and you were practically starved for it. You tugged incessantly at his shirt, a silent plea for more. When you parted for breath you pressed your face into his shoulder again, muffling a needy whine.

“Now, I might not be able to come back to bed just yet, but I know the perfect way to make it up to you,” Engie said, pulling at the waistband of your pajama bottoms. You quickly stood and removed them yourself, leaving you in nothing but your underwear and a loose fitting shirt. Before you could take off anything else you were pulled back into Engie’s lap. “You look cute like that, you know?” he said. “In nothing but my shirt and your panties, just lovely.”

You blushed, but gave him a confused look. “Well, the shirt can stay, but doesn’t the underwear kinda have to come off eventually?”

“Not necessarily,” Engie said with a hint of mischievousness in his voice. His gloved hand ran up your thigh, and you let out a soft sigh. His other hand rested on the small of your back, keeping you steady and secure on his lap. Your body was already beginning to heat up as he reached your hip, caressing you gently and making you whimper. Usually such a small gesture wouldn’t get a reaction out of you, but it had been so long.

It felt like an eternity before he finally moved to run his fingers over your clothed slit. “Oh fuck,” you murmured as the fabric slowly began to dampen. You leaned your head on Engie’s shoulder, eyes rolling.

“That’s it, just relax and enjoy yourself,” Engie whispered into your ear, placing soft kisses on your jawline and trailing down to your neck. You moaned softly, unable to resist the urge to roll your hips as his fingers found your clit. How were you already so close? You must have been really pent up. “Are you close already, sweetheart?” Engie asked, seeing how you were squirming in his lap.

“I think so,” you stammered, gripping Engie’s shirt as you tried to hold back. “Fuck, it just feels so good.”

“You poor, sweet thing,” he crooned. “Laying all by your lonesome for so long. I’ll bet you haven’t even touched yourself in the past week.”

He wasn’t wrong. Most of the time you just went to sleep, hoping you would get some attention the next day. It wasn’t that you didn’t have the desire or the means to get yourself off, you just wanted to let your need build. You knew that the more it built the more rewarding it would be when Engie finally made time for you, and in a way, you were now getting exactly what you had been craving.

“How about you just go on and come for me?” he said, smirking as he circled your clit with his fingers. “I know you want to, and I wanna see it. I don’t want you to hold back.”

The idea that Engie was eager to see you come coupled with the pressure of his fingers was enough to push you over the edge. You called out his name in broken syllables, gripping onto him tightly as you rode out your orgasm.

“Ah ah, keep those pretty eyes open,” he said. You hadn't even realized you had been squeezing your eyes shut until he pointed it out. “I want you to look at me, honey.” You groaned, opening your eyes with some struggle. The look of admiration on Engie’s face immediately made the effort worth it.

You were breathless, panting as he held you in his arms. Your face was flushed down to your neck and the fabric of your underwear was slick with your release. You looked like a proper wreck, yet you couldn’t be happier, especially since Engie hadn’t stopped showering you with kisses since you came down from your high.

“So pretty,” he sighed. “I want to see more. You can come again for me, right sweetheart?”

Oh, you liked the sound of that. You gave him a nod and a breathless, “I think so.” You lifted your head from his shoulder, pressing your lips to his in a surprisingly chaste kiss. “Just be gentle. I’m still sensitive.”

“Of course. Here, let’s get these out of the way.” He pulled your underwear down your legs, letting them drop to the floor. You spread your legs wider, watching as Engie removed his glove, revealing his prosthetic hand.

The Gunslinger had always fascinated you. In fact your inquiries about that marvel of craftsmanship was what had initially drawn you and Engie together. The metal glinted in the yellow glow of the workshop’s lights, highlighting every miniscule detail.

When those mechanical fingers ran over your thigh, you were pleasantly surprised to find that they weren’t cold at all. You had no idea how, but despite being made of metal, the Gunslinger always seemed to match an average human’s body temperature. Sometimes it could even be a bit warmer, which was quite comforting if you wanted some extra heat on an especially cold night. You whimpered as his fingers dipped between your thighs, slowly pressing into you.

Engie watched your face, checking for any sign that you were uncomfortable, that it was too much. When he saw none he continued, sliding his fingers into you to the last knuckle. That earned some louder sounds from you, especially when he began thrusting his digits in and out. You were lucky that no one but Engie came to this part of the base during this time of night. Anyone who overheard you would have immediately known exactly what was going on within the workshop.

“I love those noises of yours. I wonder how loud you can get?” he mused, watching your expression melt into one of ecstasy. Then those fingers curled inside you, striking that sensitive bundle of nerves that was guaranteed to have you moaning. And you most certainly did moan, bucking against his fingers with a harsh cry. However your sounds only reached their peak when Engie paired the curling of his fingers with the stroking of his thumb over your clit.

Your thighs shook as you came again, arching back as your fingers dug into Engie’s leg. You would have fallen to the floor if it wasn’t for his free arm being wrapped firmly around you, keeping you seated safely on his lap. “God damn, that was intense,” Engie chuckled. “I must be doing a good job!”

“Don’t tease me,” you gasped, still trying to catch your breath as your orgasm subsided.

“I would never, darlin.’ But I can’t deny that you're boosting my ego a bit, and I appreciate that.” He waited for you to come down fully, your breathing evening out and your trembling beginning to subside before he continued. “Now, there was one more thing I wanted to show you, if you’re up for it. You see that button at the base of the Gunslinger?” You nodded, following his gaze and immediately spotting the red button where metal met flesh. You were pretty sure it had always been there. It never even occurred to you to ask what its purpose was. “How about you go ahead and press it,” he suggested.

That was all the temptation you needed. Nervously, you reached out and pressed the button, only to let out a startled gasp when the metal appendage started vibrating. “Holy shit,” was all you managed to say in response, making Engie laugh.

“Yeah, that was about the reaction I expected,” he said. “I’ve been working on this in my free time. It was originally gonna be a Valentine's Day gift, but I just couldn’t wait to show it off.”

You were both impressed and baffled. “Are you telling me this is what you’ve been doing in this workshop these past several nights?”

“Not entirely,” Engie said. “Like I said, it was just a pet project.”

You sighed, knowing that you were still recovering from your second orgasm. A third would be a difficult feat, but you couldn’t deny your own curiosity. Where else would you find a man who would literally program his own hand for your pleasure? Plus, you liked the idea of a challenge. “Well, how about we take this little innovation for a test drive?” you asked, giving Engie a seductive look.

He mirrored your expression. “I was hoping you would say that, sweetheart.”

Engie took everything much slower this time, only circling around your clit. Any direct stimulation would surely overwhelm you, and he didn’t want that, at least not yet. Still, you immediately started trembling, not at all prepared for the intensity of the vibrations. That’s not to say it didn’t feel quite nice though. You bit your lip, stifling any moans that tried to escape.

“Don’t start holding back on me now, honey,” Engie said the moment he noticed you were trying to keep quiet. “I wanna hear all those pretty sounds you make.” He began kissing your neck, rubbing firmer circles until your muffled whimpers turned into full on moans once again.

His fingers slipped into you, offering a whole new range of intensity as they curled and thrust against your most sensitive spots. You rocked shamelessly against his palm, forcing his fingers deeper. It was exhausting yet so immensely pleasurable. You bucked and he worked his fingers, both of you ever so gradually working towards a third orgasm.

When you finally did come it happened rather suddenly, starting as a small building of pleasure that quickly escalated until your thighs were quivering and your back was arching. The sound you made when you climaxed was more akin to a sob than a moan.

“Good girl. There’s even more where that came from,” Engie said, not even pulling his fingers out. The implication was clear.

“Dell, I don’t know if I can,” you whimpered.

“Just one more time for me, darlin’,” Engie said between soft kisses to your forehead and cheeks. “I know you can do it.” His words and his touch were paradoxically comforting and overwhelming. Still, you were effectively tempted to try, signaling your willingness with a shaky nod. Even so, you couldn’t stifle your rather harsh reaction to the feeling of the vibrations becoming stronger.

“Dell! Oh fuck!” Your body sizzled, every sensation feeling like electricity on your skin. If your mind had been clearer you would have been astounded at the effort it must have taken to add not only a vibration function to the Gunslinger, but also multiple settings for said vibrations. However your mind was anything but clear. Engie may have been speaking to you, perhaps crooning words of praise, talking about how much he enjoyed your sensitive body, or how helplessly adorable you looked when you squirmed in his lap. Whatever it was, it all faded into the background as your other senses began to take over.

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as the pleasure became overwhelming, almost unbearable. It was a constant barrage of touches, moans, and trembling bodies. There was barely any buildup to the fourth and final orgasm, only an unwavering sensation and a sudden, shaking, screaming climax that seemed to hit you out of nowhere, leaving your body as an over sensitive wreck, squirming and reaching for anything to ground yourself.

That thing you were reaching for ended up being Engie himself. You clutched onto him for dear life even long after the aftershocks had faded, still shaking, face red and hot from a few tears that managed to escape. “I’ve got you, darlin,’” Engie whispered, keeping you steady even as your body trembled beneath his touch. The last thing he wanted was you falling off his lap. “You’re safe. I’ve got you.”

Slowly, your body stopped shivering and your death grip on Engie’s shoulders finally loosened, leaving you to go limp in his arms. Your tears dried and your heart rate dropped, the rush of adrenaline fading until all you were left with was blissful relaxation.

“I’m guessing that you’re more than satisfied now, aren’t you, sweetheart?” Engie asked, allowing himself a smug look once he was sure you had recovered enough. “Did I manage to make up for all the nights that I missed?”

You let out a weak laugh. “God, you definitely did. I just hope you don't expect me to go back to bed. There’s no way I’m going to be able to walk back to our room after that.”

Engie chuckled, and you couldn’t help but laugh along with him. “Of course not, honey. Just relax here.” His hand rubbed up and down your back, a soothing and welcome sensation to your still quite sensitive body. “Just close your eyes. If you fall asleep, I’ll carry you back to bed, alright?”

“And you’ll stay, right?” you asked, looking up at him hopefully. He gave you a soft smile, brushing your hair out of your face and pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“Of course darlin.’ I’ll stay.”

[valentine-agere]

Sweet dreams summary: You're having a tough time sleeping. Luckily Engie's happy to help! word count: 640 authors notes: reader is regressed and nonverbal, and all interactions are platonic (bc reader is baby of course) ^_^ warnings: none

You must've been standing there outside his door for at least ten minutes.

In your head, you weighed your options- you could A) give up, and walk back to your room with your tail tucked between your legs or B) wake Engie up like you originally planned. This was far from the first time you'd done something like that, but somehow you never felt any less guilty for disturbing his sleep or his work. Then again, he never seemed upset with you, either. You had a special spot in his heart, you knew it.

Still, that did little to make you feel better about bothering him so late in the night, especially considering how badly you knew he needed his rest. He was a very busy man- a very, very, busy man. But you'd had a nightmare, and you knew Engie would be able to help. You'd been trying to get yourself back to sleep all by yourself, but after what felt like hours of tossing and turning you knew you'd need someone to keep you company until you could fall asleep again. After another minute or so of silent deliberation, you decided to suck it up and knock on his door.

Three small, quick taps. You waited for a reply, holding your breath, but you didn't hear anything. You didn't know if you should knock again, or just leave. You decided to take a chance, and knocked once more, this time a bit louder.

"I'm comin'." Came his tired voice. A few seconds later, the door opened. "What is- oh, hey, pumpkin."

His expression softened when he saw you. You gave a small smile.

"What're you doin' up so late, kiddo?" He asked, his tone sweet as it always was with you. You hesitated, before holding your arms out towards him. He understood all your gestures by now. "Ah, I see. Didja have a nightmare?"

You nodded, your gaze shifting to the floor.

"Aw, it's alright, sweetheart. C'mere, c'mon." He gently scooped you up, carrying you into his room and shutting the door behind himself. "Poor thing."

He sat you down on his bed. "I take it you wanna sleep here tonight?"

You nodded.

Engie ruffled your hair, smiling. "Alright, kiddo. I don't mind."  It was then you realized you'd forgotten your stuffie. You were unsure how you could forget such a thing, but either way, the idea of going back for it didn't sound very appealing. Engie, of course, seemed to take notice. "You forget yer stuffie, huh?"

You nodded again, looking elsewhere. 

"Don't worry about it, sugar. I can go get it." He assured, standing up. "You stay here 'n get comfy, okay? I'll be right back, promise."

You, of course, nodded, settling in under the covers, wrapping yourself in a nice blanket cocoon like you always did. True to his word, he didn't take long, returning with your stuffie in hand. "Hey, kiddo." He greeted you. You waved in turn.

He handed you your stuffie. "There you are." He said, taking a seat beside you on the bed. You hugged it tightly to your chest, before looking up at him. He looked back, smiling. "Can I ask what the dream was about, honey?"

You shook your head, hiding your face in your stuffie. You didn't want to remember. He put a comforting hand on your back. "Alright. I understand. It's over now, okay? No more scary dreams. Papa's gotcha."

You didn't say anything, just leaned into him, nuzzling his arm close.

"I know, darlin'. I'm right here."

You let him wrap an arm around you, snuggling in close to him. It wasn't long before he noticed you drifting off. He chuckled softly, petting your hair. "Sweet dreams, kiddo."

It didn't take long for you to fall back asleep, curled up safely in his arms.

[little-pocket-medic]

i’ve been sorta avoiding medic all week out of nerves, but i really need some healing.

i’m in the medbay, trying to explain myself to him. he looks exasperated… and kind of distressed? like seeing me hurt is upsetting him more than usual.

see, doc, i was climbin’ a tree, trying to get a picture of this really cool bird i thought you would like, and i kinda sorta may have fell out of it.

twenty feet out of it.

so uh… i hold up my left arm. it’s pointing in a direction that i’m fairly certain arms are not supposed to point.

listen, i know you’re kinda too small to really use the medigun right now, but maybe you could talk me through it? i can’t find engie anywhere and who knows how long he’ll be gone, and my arm really, really hurts.

he cautiously agrees. i know he hates it when other people touch his stuff, but i do my best to reassure him that i’ll be good and do exactly what he says.

i bend down so he can hitch a ride on my unharmed shoulder. he instructs me on how to use the ceiling-mounted medigun- press this button, turn this knob, set these numbers on its control panel. seems like this model packs more of a punch than his portable battlefield one.

i push the power lever forward and shudder with relief as the red energy flows into my arm, setting the bones into place and knitting them back together. when it’s done, i wiggle my fingers. it’s like nothing ever happened.

damn, doc, this is pretty satisfying. i can see why you like doing it… why you miss doing it. hey, don’t look so sad, doc, i’m sure you and engie can fix this crazy size thing soon. it’s not like you’re gonna be tiny forever…. right?

he’s leaning against my neck now, so i can’t really see him, but his breath sounds a little shaky. is he scared of heights?

i carefully pick him up off my shoulder and cradle him in my hands to get a better look at him. he’s hiding his face. why?

i hear a tiny sniffle.

oh.

doc, hey, are you okay? listen, don’t cry- i’m really sorry if i made ya sad. doc, i promise you won’t stay this size forever. and even if you did, i’d still lo-

shit. i didn’t mean to say that. well, i’ve gone this far.

i’d.. still love ya, doc.

and- and i mean that! yes, i’m serious. listen, i’m really sorry to have told ya when you’re havin’ a breakdown and all that but i’ve been overthinkin’ that note like “what if he takes it the wrong way and hates me” or “what if he thinks i’m just makin’ fun of him” and i been sick with worry all week and i couldn’t frickin’ take it anymore!

what?

no, of course it’s not just sexual, doc, i don’t see you as- as some sort of object. i like you. as a person. for reals.

🫀 anon

TW: Angst, mentions of arm injury/sex. Nothing graphic.

Medic let out a tired sigh. Writing in his journal wasnt the same as it used to be- therapeutic. Calming. But now, he's just struggling to hold a pencil.

A pencil. He could barely hold a pencil.

The team had been struggling without him recently. Tales of their losses always found their way back to him- tales of his failure.

Sure, being small was fun for a bit. But it long outlasted it's welcome. He just wanted to be back to his old routine. His old small talk with Engineer after battles. His chess games with Heavy.

....his bickerings with Scout.

As Scout came into the medbay, Medic pulled his notebook shut. He turned to him, frowning at the state of his arm and the likely false story.

He couldn't do much with it right now. He could have Scout try and cast it, but it was very likely he'd mess it up and cause more issues. Well, Medic could talk him through the Medi-gun. Worth a shot.

The Doctor explained how to use the ceiling mounted healing device in a low, monotone voice. He didn't do it on purpose- the lack of sleep and the abundance of stress simply took a toll.

He climbs onto his shoulder, getting a better view and allowing the other to hear easier.

Scout seemed to get most of what he said, as the runners arm went back into place. He rambles as he usually does, trying to reassure the Doctor that it wouldn't last forever.

Would it last forever?

Medic grabbed his sleeve and leaned against Scouts neck. It very well could- Engineer normally fixed problems very quickly; This was taking weeks.

Scout seems to take note, picking the little German up and holding him in his wrapped hands.

Now in view, Medic has a harder time concealing his sorrows. Normally he's rather good at it- but with everything piling on...

In an effort to retract his previous statement, The runner let's something slip.

'I love you, doc.'

No, you don't. Medic says, almost angry, in a stern tone. 'You don't even know me...' He wanted to add, but didn't. He already said too much.

He listened to Scouts talk about how he didn't just see him sexually, but he might as well of been on mute. Medic wasn't listening anymore.

Unless you vish to torment me furzher, you may leave. He says, taking off his glasses and wiping his eyes. Talk to Engineer about zhis. I'm not paid to be your zherapist...

Cold. Even for Medic. His emotions were getting the better of him.

While never conventionally kind, Medic always had his ways of showing he loved his fellow mercenaries. This was out of character.

[paranoidginger]

Thank you all so much for your support on my CloneBlu AU! Today I will be expanding on the lore that I have come up with (No art this time, sorry guys!) as a brief overview!

My Team Fortress 2 alternate universe, found under the tag #cloneblu, follows the assumption that the Red team mercenaries are the original mercs, while Blu is made up of clones of Red. Thanks to the cloning process, they are nearly identical to their opposing counterparts, but with a few things that set them apart, such as scars and other small irregularities.

The respawn machine is also used in this AU, but in order to work, the body of the deceased must be placed into the respawn area (a job mostly done by the medic) and the machine must be manually turned on.

Despite being clones, the Blu team follows the same age rules as the Red team, with Scout, Demo, Sniper, and Pyro being the youngest, and the others being quite a bit older. This being said, I will not ship any of the four mentioned above with any of the older mercenaries, who are old enough (or close to it) to be their parents. Based on my headcanons, as well as canon clues, the ages of the mercenaries go as followed:

Scout- 27, Sniper- 28, Demo- 29, Pyro- 26-29, Engie- 45, Soldier- 47, Medic- 47, Heavy- 48, Spy- 48.

The romantic ships that I will be using in this AU consist of Engie + Spy, Heavy + Medic, and Pyro + Scout. I am also fine with Sniper + Scout as well as Sniper + Demo! I personally just like Pyro and Scout as a ship!

For platonic relationships, Medic, Heavy, Engineer, and Spy all have a fatherly relationship with Scout. Engie acts as a dad to all of the younger mercenaries, especially Pyro. Medic and Engineer are close friends as are Sniper and Spy. Demo and Soldier are also very close friends! In general, all of them get along fairly well. (Medic as an adoptive dad to scout is very important to me.)

If you made it this far, please feel free to ask any questions about my AU and I will do my best to answer them!!

[simp999]

Can I request something sorta angsty, yet fluffy towards the end for soldier (blu specifically)?

Specifically something to do with a losing streak, and the reader feels like a disgrace to the team. So he's sat there to comfort them. Maybe in like a friends to lovers context too (so like that's when a first kiss happens)

Sorry if this is too much, I'm not really good at writing and I enjoy the way you write the mercs in general

Aaaa I'm so sorry for taking so long- I hope this reaches your expectations!! And I'm so glad that you enjoy how I write the mercs- it's really reassuring to hear that since I'm still quite new to it www

BLU! Soldier x Reader Oneshot - You have me.

Wc: 1.8k

Themes: hurt/comfort, Angst, Fluff, Romantic

A/N: ..Does BLU Solly have a different name?

Taglist: @skeleton-stomper-xoxo @moopy-milk

Masterlist

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You hear a loud knock at the door, making you jump. It doesn't take much effort to know who could possibly be knocking that loud- and who would be busting the door down, had you not locked it.

You can't let him see you like this.

He'll think you're weak, right? You can't let him know how easily stuff gets to you. How easily a mere few words can plague your mind- and destroy it from the inside out. Not to mention the terrible job you've been doing on the battlefield, all of your recent losses feel like they were your fault. You could have done something better every time, and it feels like you never learn from your mistakes despite trying so hard to do so. The last battle was what tipped you off the edge completely- you could have won. But you hesitated. The RED Soldier ran off with the intelligence, and you were a second too late to attack. Most of the BLU team saw it, and decided to keep quiet and distance themselves. Spy was the only one to speak up later once you two had ended up alone in the hallway of the base.

"I NEED YOU TO GO EAT, PRIVATE! WE'RE CURRENTLY PUTTING THE FOOD AWAY AS WE SPEAK."

You nod to yourself- you know for a fact that you risk a great chance at your voice cracking if you spoke. Despite that nod, you know you don't have the guts to show your face to anyone any time soon- it's going to take a while for your face to get less red and puffy.

"I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, COME EAT OR I'M BREAKING DOWN THIS DOOR!"

Oh. Oh no. You know that the guy has no restraint- but does he really have to do that far again? This'll be the third time you've seen him punch a hole through your door since you've been here- and you've been lucky compared to the others.

You let out a quick sigh, going up to gently lean on your door. Without opening it, you talk to him through it;

"I'll- I'll go eat later. I'm not hungry right now."

That came out a lot softer than you had hoped, and a lot more hesitant.

"NO, SIR! YOU NEED TO RE-FUEL FROM OUR EARLIER BATTLE!"

And with that, he begins to fumble with the doorknob. You try to hold it in place- but it's no use.

"I AM COMING IN NOW!! I WILL BRING YOU TO THE TABLE MYSELF."

You...don't really have a choice here, do you? You'd rather not have to ask Engie to replace your door handle again, so you reluctantly unlock it, still doing your best to hold it in place. You're still not ready to face him.

It doesn't take much for him to push the door open- nearly shoving you aside until he feels the extra weight against the door.

"THERE! NOW COME-" He cuts himself off mid-sentence when he sees your fragile form, holding your hands to your chest and making yourself appear as small as possible.

He stutters a few words, a mix between you's, what's and how's. He's never been too good with words, and he's really regretting that right now.

"WHO-" he notices the way you flinch a bit at the loudness, and immediately adjusts himself.

He takes a moment to take his helmet off and holds it close to show respect, and to show that he's listening.

"Who.. did this to you?"

You lazily shake your head, a nervous smile beginning to form. Always assuming people are the problem, that guy.

"It's nothing- I'm just overreacting and need a bit of time to mys-"

"If someone dares hurt you this much then it isn't nothing. Now tell me who did what so I can beat those commies' asses into the dirt. Was it those damned REDs?"

Your body still feels weak, so you gently go to sit on your bed, grabbing a plushie that Pyro had given you one day to pet and calm yourself. He comes to sit a few feet away from you, unsure if he should pat your back or leave you be, so he ends up sitting with his back straight and the farthest things from casually, with all of his attention on you.

"It's- still, it's just me overreacting-"

"NO- no, it is not. Let me hear what happened first."

You try to figure out how to phrase it all properly, but it's hard to do so with your thoughts racing.

"It's just- y'know, the losses n'.. Stuff."

Jane's brows furrow in confusion. But you always seemd to give it your best. You always fought as hard as you could, making sure that your team could stay in the match. He'd seen the way you'd casually warn your teammates of any nearing opponents, or how you'd skillfully avoid attacks and take down REDs. You often prioritized your team's safety over your own. He'd often hear you shout "6 o'clock!" or if there were enemies near, you suggested the team learn some basic sign language. He has to admit, it has saved him many times.

Another thing he noticed was that you tended to stick near him. Scout would often make fun of you for being Soldier's 'pocket buddy'- but you two simply managed to work well together. You were his common sense when he didn't have any. Which is why he immediately noticed that you began to keep your distance- ever since the second battle of your loosing streak, you've been straying farther and farther from him on the battlefield. He simply couldn't put two and two together. He didn't know how to help- he was never good with comfort.

So, he leaned in for a hug.

You flinched and shied away.

He could feel his heart break in his chest.

You always liked the pats on the head after battles, or when he'd pick you up and carry you to show you off after some exceptional battles. None of it added up- unless..

"Is it that damned RED soldier? Did he do something?"

You froze at the mention of him. There was no getting out of this. You took a long breath in and curled into yourself even more.

"It's- it's stupid. I'm just overrea-"

"-No. Tell me what the hell the bastard did." He was barely able to keep his fury contained. How dare that RED son of a bitch hurt you?!

You mumbled under your breath. Jane couldn't make sense of it, so he asked you once more.

"Never send a coward to fight a man's war, Biscuit." You held your breath, not wnting to reveal any more. Jane knew better, though. He knew that you simply getting called a coward wouldn't be enough to ruin your mood as much as this- you were so brave! Why would and insult that has nothing to do with you hurt so much?

So, he questioned you on it.

"...He calls be Biscuit because I crumble in the face of danger." You glance away. "That's what he said, anyways."

"But you don't. You often sacrifice yourself for the team. It's not always taking a bullet for us, but risking yourself to tell us that there's a teleporter hidden somewhere, or revealing your location to tell me to watch out behind me."

"But I am a coward! Even the BLUs think so-" You began to ramble, trying to validate your feelings- accidentally revealing too much.

He wants to comfort you. He wants to squeeze you so tight, and not let anyone take you away. To promise you you'll be safe with him. But first, a much more important question needs to be answered;

"What makes you think that?"

You panic, realising that you're going to have to reveal your secret. You hope that he's stupid enough that he doesn't get it.

"You remember earlier, when the RED Soldier took our intelligence, and was the closest to him?"

"Yes. You shot at him and missed."

"I hesitated."

He stayed quiet for a moment.

"It cost us the battle. I cost us the battle."

Still, nothing was adding up. You're always making hundreds of split-second decisions, evaluating every variable and trying to decide the best course of action in milliseconds. Why was a second of hesitation tearing you apart so much?

"Spy came up to me after the battle."

Jane's brows furrowed even farther.

"Sparing the RED soldier isn't going to make the BLU one like you any more."

"And he's right. You hate me. You all hate me. I can't do anything right, and you're all paying the price for my mistakes. I'm a liability, and- and I shouldn't even be on the battlefield!" Tears began to build up and overflow, your words getting louder and smushed together the longer you went on.

"I- I don't have anyone anymore!"

"You have me, Cupcake." His expression softens as he puts all of your words together.

"You.. you just want me to be proud of you? Buttercup, you have no idea how proud I am." He had an expression of disbelief written across his face, you really meant the world to him.

"You mean it?"

"I do.-"

"-I love you so damn much, you have no idea."

He's quick to hold you in a firm embrace when you tackle him in a hug. He only loosens up to pat you on the head and eventually moves any stray hairs before giving you a kiss on the forehead.

He breaks loose from your hug to give you a long speech about how strong you are, and how he'd be completely lost without you beside him. You sit on his lap as he reminds you of some of his favorite moments in battle- there's a fondness in his eyes when he recounts the first time he rocket-jumped with you.

He carefully wipes away any remaining tears, only to stare at you with so much love and adoration in his eyes. You really did mean a lot to him, and he'd do anything to show you his appreciation for you. He realizes that he's staring and quickly pulls you close to hide his face in the cook of your neck. This is when you realize that you forgot to tell him that you felt the same way- but before you could tell him, he just barely broke the hug enough to ask you;

"Can.. May I kiss you?"

You closed the distance without a second thought. Jane absentmindedly held you tight, and you could feel his smile grow into the kiss.

The next time you were out on the battlefield, both teams could only marvel at(-or be frustrated with) your newfound strength.

The two of you are one unstoppable force to be reckoned with.

.

.

.

Sept.7.23

[fatgumsurpremacy-remastered]

How would the mercs react to their s/o trying to write them a love poem?

:)

Ok, I'm not good at all with sappy stuff but let me give it a try. @blubushie (for mention of sniper. go crazy buddy.)

Demo: Demo is very emotionally backed up so it would take him a good long while for him to actually understand the deeper meaning of the poem. But when he does he wont really know how to react. He'd sort of stand around and wait for his S/O to ask him about it again so he could give them praises while he hugs them. If the opportunity doesn't arrive he'd probably try and write one back (badly) so they can bring it up.

Engie: Engie would start a little war between him and his partner. Its a gesture game baby and this man is king of subtlety. Though for love he's a bit of a show off. The more heated this fluffy little competition gets the more he amps it up. He's likely gonna try and show off with an invention or a song that'll knock the socks off of his S/O. Then he'd feel accomplished enough to lie down with 'em and whisper just how much all that stuff meant.

Heavy: Heavy is very poetic himself, though its a lot harder for him to explain it in English. Theres a lot of metaphor in his work he would have to explain to his S/O and thats easier said than done. He's very much a show don't tell sort of guy so why would he be any different in delivery. If they speak Russian rest assured that letter will return every bit of love reflected at him.

Medic: Oh boy Lutz would tease them so hard, he's so mean but he loves them very much. He's not at all used to this fluffy stuff and would scoff if anyone else did it. But with them? Of course he loves the goofy prose and obvious infatuation they have with him, how could he not? He loves every bit of the attention and will make sure to prove it by being plenty affectionate throughout the week.

Pyro: Pyro almost goes too far in excitement, theres likely a chance that Pyro just saw the Letter P followed by a heart in their bedroom and just about pranced with glee. Pyro is the type to parade their partner around proudly showing off how much they love each other. This ends up with half finished love poems strung around the room that the two encourage each other to finish.

Scout: Scout is an absolute dweeb but he'd try to play it cool by insisting that it was only expected of him to get 'fanmail'. Truth be told though Scout would melt into the floor from a kiss to the cheek by someone who he can actually call his partner. So this gesture is returned the very next day by a goddamn tsunami of gifts at their house.

Sniper: Sniper doesn't know how to react to this at all? He isn't sure why its necessary, and its hard for him to understand, but its the thought that counts. He's conflicted for a while about why exactly they'd want to tell him how they feel in writing. He's ultimately very confused but he keeps it pinned to the inside of his vest or tucked neatly into one of his pockets to keep their words on him. (He's grown on me thanks to someone I know.)

Soldier: Soldier doesn't get it but he's a big enough doofus to love it anyway. He seems like the type of guy who only ever really got valentines cards for parties. So if his S/O wrote him something he'f for sure cherish it. Even if he didn't fully understand the point or its meanings. He's a lot like Drax from Gardians of the Galaxy.

Spy: Very bold of his S/O to assume he's going to be the only one receiving love letters. Its very likely Spy knew very well before hand that they were going to be making him one so he thought ahead and got them presents and a letter of his own to be prepared. This cheeky and clever asshole!

[dopscratch]

Spydad Excerpt

so a while ago i was just idk going wild over spydad and dadgineer and my tf2 headcanons and wrote this

idk if i will ever finish it but it doesn't seem right for it to just rot away in my docs

and yes i do have a LOT of headcanons for engie's family which i may share at a later date if the interest arises haha

i still absolutely love spydad and also extremely love dadgineer so this is certainly not the end

without further ado:

The Engineer prided himself on being able to solve practical problems, very efficiently with a copious amount of gun. He had a feeling this one would take a little more nuance.

---

Down in the dusty badlands of New Mexico, a Texan with a hard hat and oil-stained overalls offered his help to a rather taken aback Frenchman in a prohibitively expensive suit. It all started when a new man joined the team of mercenaries warring in the gravel pits two exorbitantly rich brothers were feuding over. Really, the new Scout was a kid, in his early twenties physically and even younger mentally. He adapted quickly to the job and his new coworkers. It certainly wasn't his first time he had worked as a trained killer, judging by the practiced ease he handled his weapons. The amount of gloating he did while slaughtering the enemy helped too. He fit right in with the rest of the questionably sane men, sharing that marked disregard for human life. However, the resident Engineer noticed something strange going on between the newcomer and the Spy. Usually, the masked infiltrator was distant and unseen on the battlefield, his only impact being the convenient disappearance of some enemy forces and the strategic destruction of a few buildings. Ever since the Scout joined, he seemed to be much more present and daring, stabbing backs in the frontlines much more frequently. In the Engineer's opinion, Spy had blocked far too many bullets cloaked in front of the young mercenary for it to be coincidental. The implications were so clear to him. Some might have called it an instinct, others may have chalked it up to excellent reasoning skills. Regardless, the assumption had planted itself deep in the Engineer's mind, and at a certain point just became fact.

"Say, son, how does it feel to work with someone you personally know?" The Engineer asked the Scout one day as they were getting ready to enter the battlefield.

"Eh? Whaddya on about, egghead?" The pure confusion from the Bostonian would have marked an embarrassing miscalculation on Engie's part if it weren't for the Spy, standing a couple feet behind the Scout, dropping his precious cigarette. Though he quickly wiped the look off of his face, it was enough. The kid didn't know.

"Ah, never mind. Musta spaced out for a second, mistook ya for someone else. Guess I'm gettin' old, huh?" The Engineer laughed good-naturedly and headed off for the gates, leaving the baffled Scout behind.

---

The Engineer was not done with this. Perhaps it was the sudden separation from his own kids, still a fresh wound even after months. In retrospect, he had no business in meddling with the two. Interpersonal relations strayed dangerously far from his area of expertise. In the moment though, he was not about to deny the kid the presence of a father who clearly still cared for him. So, he approached the Spy on that hot, dusty afternoon.

"Spy, I know we've got our differences, but I can't just stand here and watch that sad display you got goin' there between you and your son. If there's anythin' I can do, just say the word."

"What." Was all the normally eloquent Frenchman could muster in response. 

"Well, I'm a father myself, so I suppose I could give ya some pointers-"

"I don't think I need help from a man who was banned from seeing his own children," the Spy snapped back coldly.

"How didja know about that?" Even as the Engineer asked the question, he already knew the answer. Still, it was strange hearing it from someone else when he had put so much effort into separating his personal and work life.

"I am the Spy. It is my job. However, you are the Engineer. Your job is to make little toys to aid us in battle. So tell me, tinkerer, how did you know about me?" 

"Well..." He started, lifting a hand to adjust his helmet. "I noticed y'all been hangin' around a touch more ever since the kid joined..." The Spy raised an eyebrow.

"So you guessed. It was pure luck. Fascinating." The observation was nearly more sarcasm than accent, and Spy had a pretty heavy accent.

"I wouldn't say that," Engie quickly interjected, unwilling to take that blow to his ego. "I’d call it more of a... educated guess. A hypothesis, ya might say.”

---

and unfortunately that's all i've got, but hope you enjoyed :)

[bobamilkk]

TF2 HEADCANONS PART TWO ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

I told myself I’d get these up one of these days👍 I finished this list at 4 am last night so none of this makes any sense and every word is more chaotic than the ones before it and no I’m not sorry y’all sighed up for this bs

Scout

-Can understand a good chunk of French but can’t speak more than a few simple words if that, has no clue how he understands it (Spy spoke a good amount of French around him as a baby or something idk)

-Can be just has hard to find as Spy-once you loose sight of him he’s impossible to find if he’s actually trying to stay hidden-Like father like son

-Can and will steal your food-this includes Heavy and Medic-He has no fear whatsoever and has been sent to respawn god knows how many fucking times because of this-And yet he still does it

-Loves scifi movies and comics and if you watch a movie with him half of it is him pointing out random trivia facts because he’s incapable of shutting the fuck up (this is also what happens when you watch a movie with me irl. My grandparents are sick and tired of it. Yes this is even more self projection what of it?)

-has mastered the younger sibling talent of fucking climbing people if it means getting something that’s held over his head. He also bites

Soldier

-it’s impossible to tell if he’s insulting you or complimenting you 90% of the time

-Has stabbed Scout’s hand to the table to prevent him from stealing food before and no one stopped him

-The team has movie nights once a week and Soldier always puts on the same inaccurate WW2 documentary he made himself when it’s his turn to pick-he used to put on 10 hours of the American National Anthem but someone (read: The rest of the team working together) lost (read: Violently destroyed) the tape after the third time

-I said he was from Missouri once in a rp cuz my rp friend and I are both from different parts of Missouri so that’s my hc now

Pyro

-I always hc him as Irish for some reason idk why

-Can casually pick up every merc except for Heavy-He struggles a bit with Medic because that man is pure muscle but they can indeed pick him up

-May or may not be a cannibal-it’s a little uncertain but either way they’re banned from the kitchen and cooking duty

-I’m a sucker for the hc that he does not like water whatsoever-Getting this man a bath is like trying to bathe a cat except somehow even more deadly

Demo

-This may be the impulsive sleep deprivation but my brain randomly went “What If he can see general ghosts because of his possessed eye socket, not just Eyelander or the scream fortress ghosts” so sometimes people walk in on him casually having a conversation with the air. Considering he’s made out with his own organs in his head, this is one of the less weird things they’ve walked in on him doing

-Surprisingly he’s the best with kids out of all 9 mercs, Heavy is a good runner up though and Spy’s not far behind but will never admit it

Heavy

-Accent gets thicker when he’s talking to people he cares about

-Was the one who suggested the movie nights in the first place

-Actually cleans up in the base unlike literally everyone else

Engie

-People don’t realize how unhinged this man is ok??? Anyways he’s a caffeine addict and has developed the habit of pulling way too many all nighters if it means getting work done (like me. It’s 4 am as I work on this list. Help)

-What’s a southern farm boy without a few dozen concerning stories about pushing cousins out of second story barn windows or near drowning fishing story? My cousins lived on a farm when we were kids and they scared the shit out of me I swear there was a new broken bone every summer

-probably once had a sleep deprived mental breakdown on his workshop floor because the sweet tea one of the mercs made him wasn’t sweet enough idk man I’m sleep deprived rn and could really use a southern style sweet tea

Medic

-Mann vs Machine hc that his hometown would rather deal with the robots than having Medic anywhere near them ever again. They want him GONE

-Sleeps like a fucking corpse-You can’t even tell he’s breathing unless you look closely. He even crosses his arms like a corpse

-Will take you graverobbing for a romantic date-gotta get experiment canvases somehow he’s running out of room on the other mercs without them just dropping dead from it all

Sniper

-The opposite of a morning person, but his internal clock won’t let him sleep in ever. The suns up? He’s up! Someone help him

-Has befriended a wild owl and feeds it at night-The offense trio very violently helped him name it (They fist fought eachother over who’s name was better while Sniper spaced out thinking about random gator facts)

Spy

-An adrenaline junkie but will never ever admit it

-Spy can mimic voices to a near perfect even without his disguise kit-he however rarely uses this and instead simply mocks everyone instead because he finds it funny (“This is Scout! Rainbows make me cry!”)

-Wears a corset because I said so-It always matches perfectly with his outfit and underwear too-He feels SO bonita

Bonus since it’s Pride Month

-Scout is gay and so many levels deep in the closet it’s embarrassing-He’s also trans because I said so

-Soldier is trans, bi, and poly :) his list of wives consists of anyone and everyone /j

-Spy is bi and a cis man who wears dresses regularly he’s gnc af and I love that for him he’s my wife now

-Medic is gay and still legally married to his wife they’re mlm wlm solidarity married for tax benefits /j

-Pyro is trans, non-binary, and pan and uses he/they pronouns because I said so

-None of these men are straight ok

-Medic did both Scout and Soldier’s top surgery but both of them instead have overly extravagant extremely gorey stories on how they got their scars

[typingatlightspeed]

Hmmm..... What if pyro really wanted to take Engie on the best date he's ever had, and have dinner at the most Texas style restaurant with the biggest 72oz steak. And some extra fluff too because I'm a sucker for those two being bff's and lovers. Maybe it'll be a double date with two of their buddies that just happened to have the same idea?

TF2 Fanfic - Flesh and Blood

Filled with new clarity on his feelings about Engineer's body modifications, Pyro takes him out to dinner to talk about it and spoil him a little.

Ao3 Link! Part of Monstrous Intent!

Hope you don't mind I deviated a little, Dizzy!

---------

"So you see my problem here, Doc?" Engineer asked, gesturing to a drawing in a well-worn notebook that sat on his drafting table. "With arms and legs, I can observe 'n get good enough photos for easy replication o' detail, but with face and torso, I'm fightin' one hell of an uphill battle, 'n I'd rather not just rely on photography. It can only catch so much accurately, especially with the finer details, like depth of colour 'n subdermal stuff that shows through. And hair patterns."

Medic stroked his chin as he peered over Engineer's shoulder at his notes. It was one of many battered and rumpled spiral-bound affairs that contained his scrawling and theorizing on his life's passion project. "Perhaps degloving?"

"You think flayin' me's gonna be the best option?" Engineer asked earnestly, crossing his arms over his chest in thought.

"Nein, not simply flaying. It would need to be a degloving to preserve detail."

"The difference bein'?"

"Flaying is simply removing the skin from the body. Yes, often kept intact for preservation, but it usually does not bring with it the subcutaneous tissues, so the structure is not maintained. Degloving is usually from a shearing force, and removes the subcutaneous tissues still attached to the skin, which not only can help better preserve shape but also structure, which—I wager—will allow you to better map the details to your artificial reproduction. It will also protect against stretching or distending during the removal, which would be done with proper tools, rather than an actual shearing injury, of course," Medic explained, grinning excitedly. He wanted to go fetch his tools right away, even though they were mostly talking suppositions and theory for a much-later project. After all, Engineer had a lot to build before he started working on the exterior facade for a full-torso replacement.

Engineer nodded thoughtfully. "So how're we gonna work around respawn, is the next question? After all, you can take the skin off o' me, but it'll get picked up by respawn quick as the rest o' me, with nothin' to show for it save you havin' a fun afternoon."

Medic chuckled at that and walked over to the work bench, hopping up to sit on it and crossing his legs knee-over-knee. "We would need to keep you alive, then," he reasoned.

"I don't see myself gettin' much work done while I'm screamin' in agony 'n bleedin' all over the place what with havin' no skin." A little chuckle hefted out of Engineer at that, and he uncrossed his arms, leaning one elbow on the drafting table as he regarded his friend.

He loved these sorts of conversations. Medic was just as excited as he was to work on this project, as un-squeamish as a man could be, and made a great sounding board to bounce ideas back and forth. He'd never has gotten as far in his bodily conversions as he had without his friend's help, both by virtue of his surgical expertise in installing the new parts and in his way of figuring out a solution to damn near any problem, no matter how unlikely or outlandish. The word, 'impossible,' did not exist in Medic's vocabulary, and that fact alone made the man worth his weight in Australium.

Silence fell as both men thought, a few quiet 'hmm's filling the space. Finally, Medic perked up with a soft hoot of excitement. "I have an idea! The medigun regrows tissue easily, after all. All I would have to do is keep you alive, deglove you, and regrow the tissue, good as new!"

"That could work," Engineer hummed, a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Medic hopped to his feet, talons clicking on the cement floor as he began to pace, one arm tucked behind his back, the other gesturing as he spoke. "I can medically induce a coma, then perform the degloving procedure while you are unconscious, so that your body will not go into shock from the pain! Then it would be a simple matter to focus the medigun beam on you, set it to high charge, and allow it to regrow your tissues, which would only take a few minutes at most. In fact, the whole procedure would be just a morning, really. We could do lunch afterward! Depending on how quickly you come out of the coma, of course." He tittered. "The removed skin and subcutaneous tissues would need to be kept in refrigeration or they would begin to rot within a day or so, but if kept cold, could last several days before they rot enough to discolour. I could store it in formaldehyde, but I would need quite a lot, and it may alter colouration and structure, which would make it useless for your study, then."

"Reproducin' it realistically would be an issue then, yeah. I'll just have to work fast, I s'pose," Engineer mused. "Worst comes to worse, we just do it again so I can get another fresh piece to work with."

"That is absolutely an option," Medic conceded. "Though I would assume the amount of labour this entails, plus the time sensitivity, means it would be best pursued during a furlough rather than trying to work around our combat schedule."

Frowning a bit at that, Engineer had to nod in agreement regardless. "Yeah. Shame to waste a vacation stayin' on base, but I guess that just means I gotta time it right. And make sure Pyro ain't got plans for us already once I do pull the trigger on settin' this up."

"Speaking of Pyro," Medic hummed, giving his wings a stretch, "how are things progressing with him?"

"With my prosthetics 'n all?"

"Ja."

"Well, ever since we figured out the magic of it, 'n the how of why the Australium's been the only material to make this cockamamie project actually work—somethin' that causes me no shortage o' consternation since it means I gotta admit I was just kinda chuckin' science at the wall to see what stuck—it's been a little better. He's still not too keen on me swappin' out healthy tissue, but he ain't all unsettled by the parts themselves anymore, now that he understands why they look the way they do to his magic sight."

"He needed to look even deeper."

"I could'a taken it at face value," Engineer countered with a shake of his head. "But I ain't gonna sit here 'n tell a man older than my species what reality is. That's way too philosophical for my reckonin' anyway."

Medic made a shooing motion with one gloved hand. "Bah, reality," he dismissed with a chuckle. "But I'm glad to hear things are getting better."

"Me too. And for once it wasn't my fault for bein' a stubborn horse's ass."

"I mean, you are one. It just wasn't the problem this time."

Engineer slugged Medic in the shoulder with his left hand, laughing all the same.

"I am surprised by one thing, however."

"What's that, Doc?"

"That you're able to recreate your own body with such detail, down to veins under skin and pigmentation variations. It's an incredible artistic achievement, Engie. Especially for a man without formal training."

"Oh, I got an art degree," Engineer countered, matter-of-factly.

"I thought all of your degrees were in hard sciences."

"All my PhDs are. I got a bachelor's in fine arts when I was workin' on post-grad for my bio master's."

"You're kidding."

"Nope. Also got an associate's degree from a two-year vocational course in special effects makeup. Once I decided this was what I was dedicatin' my life to, I knew I needed more than just the metal. Prosthetics are one thing, but a full body conversion should be able to look however you want. And I've gotten enough positive feedback on all o' this," he gestured vaguely to himself, "from fellas over the years that I'm keen to keep it."

Medic laughed. "You never cease to surprise me, Engie."

"Someone's gotta keep you of all people on your toes. Well. Talons."

The door to the workshop opening drew both men's attention, and Engineer broke out in a broad grin upon seeing Pyro slip through the door in his chemsuit, mask in hand. "Well hey there, darlin'!"

"Hallo Pyro! We had just mentioned you! Were your ears burning?"

"My ears are always burning," Pyro chirped, giving Medic a grin as he trotted over to Engineer and wrapped his arms around him. "Hey there, baby bear."

"What's up, firefly?"

"Wanna go out for dinner tonight?"

"Ooh, getting asked on a date by the hottest man on base!" Medic teased, taking this as his cue to leave, clapping his friend on the shoulder before heading for the door. "Have fun! Make good decisions! Don't do anything I would do!" he called, giggling as he slipped out of the room to the sound of exasperated groans.

Shaking his head, Engineer pulled Pyro close, threading his arms around the djinni's waist. "What's the occasion?"

"Demo told me there's a really good steakhouse in town, and I wanted to treat you," Pyro replied, nosing in to press a kiss to Engineer's cheek. "So, can I pick you up around five?"

With a chuckle, Engineer gave him a squeeze. "Sure thing, just gotta go get all gussied up."

"Oh good, one of us should be dressed appropriately, at least."

*

"You sure that's gonna be alright?" Engineer asked as he watched Pyro unscrew the side filter of his mask and thread a straw through the gasket inside. The straw led down into a hurricane glass filled with a bright blue beverage, a pineapple skewered with a paper umbrella mounted on its side.

"Oh yeah, it's fine. To be honest I messed up the seal on this mask a while ago so I only wear it for aesthetic reasons, not to actually filter anything. Work masks stay in my locker."

"So this is your casual, day-to-day gasmask," Engineer reasoned, smiling against the rim of his pint of beer.

"Look, when you can't let ninety-eight percent of people know what you look like, you learn to accessorize for the occasion," Pyro teased, punctuating with a sip. "Oh man that's way stronger than I expected. Really good though."

"It's bright blue."

"Blue is objectively the best colour for a beverage to be. That's just science," Pyro reasoned, taking another sip.

"Knew I should'a done at least a bachelor's in culinary," Engineer chuckled.

A slim young man in a smart black uniform rounded on the booth they shared, pulling a notebook and pencil from his apron. "And have we decided on food yet, gentlemen?" he asked, eyes lingering on Pyro, unsure if he used the appropriate form of address. "...o-or if you need more time, I can swing back around in a little bit." He looked to Engineer, then nervously back to the person in a full chemsuit and gas mask sitting in the middle of a steakhouse, and decided that, indeed, the stout man in a stetson, yoked shirt, and nice jeans was the one he should be talking to.

"Sure, I'll have—"

"The thirty-two ounce prime ribeye—rare—with the garlic and herb butter, and the loaded baked potato," Pyro interrupted, looking pointedly to Engineer, who could tell from his body language that he knew exactly what he was doing.

With a chuckle, Engineer shook his head. "You heard the man. That's what I'll be havin'. And, uh, add a side salad on there, too. Ranch dressin'."

"Anything else?" the server asked, eyes darting between them in confusion.

"I'll take the twelve ounce tenderloin, medium rare. With the sweet potato mash, and a slice of cheesecake. Bring that out in a to-go container with the check, though, okay?"

"You want the ribeye here?"

"Yeah."

"Sure thing, sir," the server replied, spine stiff, deeply unsettled as Pyro's darkened lenses seemed to stare right through him. "I'll—I'll go get that order in for you," he stammered, peeling off to be as far from the table as possible.

"The wild thing is, this is still more relaxed than people would be around me outside the suit," Pyro mused, shaking his head. He plucked the straw from his mask and sat up. "And a side salad?!"

"Ribeye with butter's a lot o' fat 'n protein. Even more so prime grade, all that marblin'. I ain't gettin' any younger, darlin'. I'm gonna need the roughage; keep things movin'."

Pyro snorted a laugh, reeling back in his seat. "Gross! So does that mean I'm not topping tonight?"

"That's gonna be your risk-reward calculation to make," Engineer chuckled, taking a sip of his beer. "So what's the real reason for all o' this, anyway?"

"I can't take my Delly Sandwich out for dinner?"

"You absolutely can, but spoilin' me with the nicest cut on the menu feels like more'n just general appreciation. This some kind o' occasion? I ain't forgettin' an anniversary, am I?"

Pyro laid a hand atop Engineer's and tilted his head a little, indicating a smile. "No, nothing like that. I just—I wanna spoil you a little. As an apology."

"An apology?"

With a nod, Pyro squeezed his hand. "For making things hard with the whole... cyborg thing. My hangups shouldn't be your problem." A gentle frown settled on Engineer's face, and he set his beer down to hold Pyro's hand with both of his. "Py, you got a right to feel how you feel about about it."

"Yeah, but not to expect it to change something you've been working toward your whole life, and finally have the tools to accomplish. That isn't fair. And it isn't right. And I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like you needed to choose between me and your life's work. I promise you: you don't, and you never will."

"Thanks, darlin'," Engineer said softly, giving his hand a squeeze.

"Actually, Soldier said something that got me thinking."

"Oh lord..."

"No, seriously! It's... it's like you said. You're not getting any younger. You're in pain basically all the time."

Nodding, Engineer conceded, "Sure. Some days are better'n others, but..."

"And a lot of that can't really be fixed short of replacing things. And sure Medic can do a lot with his exotic animal parts, but what's sturdier than machinery? It can be maintenanced, and cared for, and parts swapped out when they get too worn down. It can last. Dell, you're already middle-aged. And someday, you'll be an old man. And someday, you won't be. But I never age." Engineer averted his eyes. He'd never been a fan of thinking about that fact.

"I'm used to outliving lovers. But I don't wanna be. I don't wanna keep doing it. I wanna be with you as long as you'll have me, but it's hard when I realize that in what's the blink of an eye for me, I'll be burying you. I can't handle the idea of a world without Dell Conagher in it, which says a lot, considering just how long I existed before Dell Conagher ever did." Pyro dipped his head and took hold of both of Engineer's hands with both of his, lifting them to the front filter of his mask as a kiss. "That's how important you are."

"Pyro..."

"If replacing meat and bone with plastic and metal means you won't be in so much pain, and maybe I won't have to stand at your grave..." Pyro's voice choked out, his shoulders slouching, and Engineer knew tears were rolling down his burning cheeks.

"Oh, Firefly," Engineer sighed, rising from his seat to circle the table and scoot in beside Pyro on his booth seat. He wrapped his arms around him, and Pyro leaned into him and tried to hold back sobs.

He fought down his own anxiety about such a display in a public place, casting a glare at anyone who would dare look their way. Pyro needed him, and that was more important than anything.

He rubbed soothing circles on the djinni's back, holding him close. "I dunno if I can wring forever outta this project. But I can get more time. And with that time, I can figure out how to get even more time after that." He nudged a hand under Pyro's chin and tilted his face up, looking into darkened lenses with a warm smile. "So if you're tellin' me you wanna be with me the rest o' your life, I'm gonna do my damnedest to make that happen."

Pyro squeezed him tightly, burying his face in the crook of his neck, and let out a weepy little sigh. "Okay," he replied, his voice wobbly. "Sorry for crying; I didn't mean—"

"It's alright, darlin'. Took a lot to come out with all o' that. I'm just sorry we're in a restaurant so I can't hold you proper."

A dreamy little hum cut through Pyro's quiet sobs. "Later, then."

"If you're still cryin' later that's a whole problem," Engineer chuckled, leaning in to press a kiss to the crown of Pyro's mask. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Pyro sighed, nodding against him.

"Alright." With one last squeeze, Engineer let go let Pyro scoot over to give him room. "Want me to stay here next to you?"

"Won't it look silly, both of us on the same side of the table with nobody across from us?"

"Don't it look silly, a feller in a cowboy hat havin' dinner with a feller in a gas mask?"

"Okay, fair."

"Don't worry 'bout it, darlin'. I'll stick by your side, and if you need to lean on me, that's what I'm here for."

"Thanks." Pyro's smile was audible in his voice, and he nudged Engineer's shoulder with his own.

"You wanna hear a story, Py?"

"Sure," Pyro said, gathering his emotions back up and taking a deep breath to calm himself down. He half-turned, leaning against the side wall of their booth so that he could face Engineer as he spoke.

"When I was a little boy, I was fascinated with my grandaddy's Gunslinger. He built it outta necessity; lost his arm in some contraption, so he slapped that baby together outta steel 'n Australium, hooked it into his nervous system with a damn pair of pliers and a whole mess o' laudanum to calm hisself down. Worked better'n the arm he lost, 'cept he was always in pain from it. Never said a word about it; that's how he was, but I could see. The way he'd wince if he hit the cuff that capped his stump, or how he took to wearin' a leather glove over it when he was workin' in the sun, since it'd heat up real nasty. No insulation in the build, y'see. Kinda like how I did with my Gunslinger, 'cept I used rubber to insulate for when I'm workin' with electricty."

Pyro nodded, listening intently, sniffling a little and wishing he could wipe his eyes. Stupid mask.

"And that's the thing. I saw how that thing helped him, and how it hurt him, and I wanted better for him. I wanted to make somethin' better. Then the accident happened."

"Accident?"

"When I was ten, the horse I was ridin' got spooked by somethin'. Bucked me off. I landed bad 'n messed my back up somethin' awful. Herniated disks, messed up a few vertebrae. Ended up needin' surgery. Took a lot 'o physical therapy to get me back on my feet, 'n even more to get me back to fightin' trim. Could'a killed me, if I'm honest. I was lucky to be alive, but I sure didn't feel lucky."

"So your back's been bad ever since you were a kid?"

"Essentially," Engineer admitted with a half-shrug. "All the liftin' I do ain't that kind to it, though. I learned real young how to lift my with knees, but that wasn't to kind to them neither. By my twenties I knew I was cruisin' for a knee replacement by my fifties. Was basically a matter o' time, 'n put a hell of a ticking clock over my ability to take mercenary jobs, 'n work on the kind o' machines I really love. It was after my first PhD that I decided I was gonna start workin' on prosthetics as a personal project on top o' my schoolin' 'n refinin' my granddaddy's sentries, 'n my daddy's dispensers. Both of 'em did a pretty number on Australian teleporters with their iterations, 'n I did the same, too."

"You based your machines on your dad and granddad's blueprints?"

"Standin' on the shoulders o' giants," Engineer hummed. "Conagher tradition. Every generation has his breakthrough, but he also inherits a legacy o' the work that came before, to get him started out 'n learnin' to iterate on a design proper. Granddaddy Radigan invented the Gunslinger, so I invented fully artificial legs 'n arms that can adjust to temperature 'n serve as the base for upgrades, 'n housin' for 'em that looks like flesh 'n blood if the wearer wants it to. I invented a spine I can replace this ol' busted thing with 'n won't leave me paralyzed. Assumin' the Doc installs it right." He chuckled. "And eventually, I'll invent a total body conversion."

Pyro nodded, understanding more than he thought he ever had. It wasn't just curiosity, it wasn't just drive, and even though he invoked it, it wasn't just legacy either. Engineer was in chronic pain, so like anything else, he decided to solve that problem. That had been the start of it all.

There was something just so right about that.

"You're always in pain," Pyro murmured.

"And I can fix it," Engineer said, reaching across the table to retrieve his beer.

Pyro smiled behind his mask, wonder in his eyes. "I know I'm not a scientist, or a wizard, or even a particularly good artist or anything, but if there's anything I can do to help with your... transition, I will."

Engineer smiled softly at that. "Thanks, firefly. I could use the perspective of someone who knows my body real well," he chuckled. "And if you got any suggestions for upgrades."

Pyro tilted his head to the side in thought as Engineer raised his glass to his lips with his free hand, taking a sip. "...vibration."

Engineer choked, snuffling as he fought to keep beer out of his nose and gulped it down with great effort. "Pyro!"