#i just ... had to get one of my dumb movie rants out of my system for other people to hear

[allycat75]

Ok, I want to get real with you Boston Dumb Fuck.

I have been holding onto this post for a bit and the thought behind it has been haunting me for months.

While I am constantly amazed at your lack of moral fiber, when I see a fellow human in trouble I can't turn away. You look like you have just enough energy to literally put one foot in front of the other, play your part and slip into unconsciousness for the rest of the day. I have seen it before and it doesn't end well. It's a living purgatory.

But I also don't like being manipulated or being made to look stupid or crazy, so I will continue to call out your bullshit and how it is emblematic of everything that is wrong in our society. I also don't think many have called you out on your bullshit before so I am happy to provide that service. As much as I desire this to be my last rant to you, I am not naive enough to think that will happen anytime soon. The Red Knight has you tight in its grip (Side note: "The Fisher King" is a great movie to watch or re-watch. It may resonate right now).

I do wish I knew that you understood how fucked up you are and have at least a semblance of a plan of how you are going to make it right once you are free. I think the reaction from your (former) fans and even the general public was a shock to your system and you have so far to go to just come up to sea level again. If past is prologue, I fear you will just coast on your White Male Privlege and never learn the valuable lessons of this disaster. But ultimately, I am probably screaming into a void. At least I have put it out into the universe...

Early on, I compared your work in "Ghosted" to a Matthew Perry performance.

Before I continue, let me say I loved Matthew Perry and I can't believe he is gone. I always felt he had so much potential, as seen in "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" and "Go On", but there was always a barrier I sensed he put up, almost like it was a performance within a performance. What he thought we wanted him to be. Now, as we know, there was a mountain of insecurity he was hiding and numbing that haunted him to the end. How I wish he could have freed himself and enjoyed some true wins.

Now, I can't help but draw some additional mournful parallels to you and your current state, beyond your "Ghosted" performance within a performance.

We know you hate yourself (you were not joking during the SMA interview). You took your hand off the wheel and eyes off the road, relying only on your Captain America/internet boyfriend/dog dad persona, and wound up trapped in a blind alley. Now you are locked in this ridiculous contract.

To numb what you have become, you have disappeared into weed, at the very least. But escaping using weed is only healthy when you know what you are escaping from. When you have no tether, you are only sucked into a void where you risk not being able to return. You may say "it's just weed", but we have seen you make bad decision after bad decision and it only takes one to be life altering.

This may be hyperbolic. You may be in control of all of this and laughing at our reaction. Maybe you have mastered The Method and apply goth white makeup before you go out, have changed your diet to be sickly thin and hunch over on purpose, for your craft. But my daddy didn't raise a fool and I don't suffer them. I know when something is rotten in Denmark. I was raised to offer a hand when I could, regardless the reason or reward. So my offer is this (much of this is repeated from previous posts, but repetition is key to learning):

STOP! STOP! STOP! Your contractual obligations should be met by now. The little racist twat got press on her project release dates. That is all she deserves. If not, you need a doctor's note saying this is killing you, because it appears it is. And switching from awkwardly showing off that fucking ring or oafishly grabbing the wifey's hand in order to meet that contractual obligation to lovable, single dog dad so as to reinforce your dog food is Nazi-free has got to be dizzying; making the crazy-maker crazy. So whomever thought this was a good idea and kept you in it long after the effects were detrimental, remove them from your circle. They have no place in a healthy future.

Get help to change the behaviors that got you painted into this corner. This situation didn't come out of nowhere. Someone or many someones exploited your vulnerabilities and they could do it again if you aren't careful. And no more shushing or egoic narrative- either that is complete bullshit or no one taught you the next part of the curriculum. For once in your life, take accountability and accept responsibility for your actions.

Take the time to become healthy and strong in mind, body and spirit. And let those who still have a chance of liking you in the future miss you. You even admitted you don't make the best first impression. Lately you haven’t been making the best second, third or fourth either. Even Scarlett seems to be getting tired of you. One or two more stunts and no one is coming back. We may be talking about you, but a short term gain will mean a long term loss. Don't worry, we will remember you, and if you do the work, we will celebrate you.

Take an active role in rebuilding your life. Decide what to be and go be it. Others shouldn't care more about your happiness and success than you do. Enjoy some wins, you are allowed. Get back into the world again and see where you can make an impact (hint- it is not with ASP. I actually think that could set us all back. A good idea whose time has passed).

You were given privlege and opportunity and it is chicken shit you ran as soon as it got a little hard. Fight for your life. Others have lost their chance but you are still here and can make it chicken salad.

PS- "Cousins" is a great movie if you are wondering about the chicken shit/chicken salad line. And don't let anyone tell you the French version is better. They are just being pretentious.

[jamiedc-they-them]

R&R Part II (Platonic)

Summary: A few months have passed since Carol has come home; and while she relishes in being home and on earth, she soon learns that you are anything but happy with your home planet.

AN// Hi all! You can read Part I here. This carries on with Y/N's character from Part I, mainly with their anti-capitalist stance, and how it can go into a sort of dig at heroes and their lack of proper helping those in need small scale. It's not a dig at the characters, just the system they are a part of (motives be damned). So, this is more of a rant piece filtered through the lens of a story. That sounded dumb; anyway, enjoy!

// Talks on anxieties, climate change, war, death, emotional overwhelm.

Carol put her feet up on the coffee table. It was nice, cosy. She was home. She could relax. The pain of losing Monica was still there, but time was making it easier to bear with. It felt wrong, saying that, but she knew her niece wouldn't mind it.

It was always nice having you around again. She missed her sibling. The snap had made your age gap even longer. You were brought into the world while she was gone, so there was a lot to both catch up on, and a long age gap between you both. It didn't matter though, you both clicked. You both just got each other. Faults and all.

It was nice not being lonely anymore. Kamala visited as well, sort of taking her into her family - but also understood boundaries and tried not to cross them with the two of you; though the two of you did get along quite well, her hyper nature helping you open up a bit.

You also told her more about your thoughts on the system you all lived under. And Kamala listened, even taking notes, and adding her own.

Carol had her issues with it - the gendered roles of society and the discrimination of people like her and other minorities - but yours seemed to go almost deeper. Sometimes, she'd see the glint in your eye when she returned from a flight around with her powers, or when you looked at her suit.

You were still doing your end of hunting for work - finding some unpaid work to help you build up that portfolio. Progress. She was happy you were making it, she even saw that you were as well.

But then, she'd see a glint in your eye whenever you looked at your bank account, seeing the monthly pay check come in. Guilt. It always confused her as to why.

She let herself think on it. You two were having a peaceful few months, having talks like the one she wanted to have with you sometimes, but mostly just being siblings.

One day, however, the question in the back of her mind just couldn't be contained, and it slipped out of her mouth before she could stop herself:

"Did I do something wrong?"

You paused the movie you were watching - Dune: Part One - and looked at her, perplexed; eyes going from the film you'd seen a million times and back to Carol.

"...No?" it was more of a question even from your lips.

She sighed, and then gathered herself - she was glad she wasn't supressing her emotions anymore, but they could be messy; she supposed that was just the point of being human, though.

"It's just..." she said, "I see the way you look at my uniform sometimes, some of the things you say to Kamala. And she, like, agrees with you?"

You paused mid sip of your beer, and put it down on the table, before leaning back and looking at your sister; really looking at her. She genuinley didn't understand it - not even how the people on her world were treated - even if by an ai, the irony of you watching Dune and what came both before and after in that universe not being lost on you - and so, you figured, if she was ripping off the band aid, you could too.

"It's not you. It's --" even you struggled with emotions and words. You put your head in your hands and ran them down your face, resting them on your chin as you continued with a question, "did Hala really fall?"

Carol was a bit shaken by the question, but nodded, wanting to see where you were going with this.

"I don't think it was you that killed it," you comforted, "not completely. War in systems like that'll happen anyway. It's what gives them meaning, keeps people in line. 'Might makes right' and all that bullshit."

"You don't think people should fight back?"

"The oppressed? Hell yeah. Always."

Carol was genuinley not fully expecting that, not with the world you lived in, not with people like --

"But, the flagsmashers --"

"Oh, don't," you made her pause, "the people trying to help people with this new adjustment. People now deemed bad because people came back and it screwed them over? Don't get me wrong, I don't agree with all the actions, but the idea? Oh yeah. Governments came back in and just told them to fuck off. I weren't around in the in-between, but I could get how that new normal suddenly being interrupted fucked them up. Even more so with...you know, the power government have, Carol. SHIELD, too. They don't care about what goes up in the air, and what it'll do down here. They just care about the next alien, while they suck our own resources that they say the new outsider can't have. People are still on the streets, Carol, still fighting for every breathe. Nothing changed for them pre or post blip. Shit didn't change."

"The blip was chaos --"

"I'm not saying it wasn't, C," you said, "but the way the people in charge acted then, to the way they acted now, I don't really see a difference. Same exploitation. Same, just, fucking, system. Same screwing people over, and pushing anyone down who dares bark back."

"So, what? Ends justify the means?"

"For you guys, it does, sure," she tried not to take it personal, "I mean, you should've seen New York, C, after the Avengers first saved it. People's lives destroyed. Cars gone. Loved ones dead. Money could help with some things, but not everything. Knew a guy, had a small restaurant that Hulk smashed into. In jail now for stealing some bread to just find a bed."

"They're trying --"

"They won't ever do enough," you shot back with, "they never will. They just want the status quo, no change. Aliens come, Avengers break things, some things get fixed; rinse and repeat until the sea or sun swallows us all."

She was glad you were being open with you, but she didn't like what you were keeping in. The worry, and pain, and grief for something bigger.

"The world's dying, Carol. Just like Hala," you chuckled, "shit, they even wanna do the whole AI thing."

"It won't be like that --"

"Won't it?" you challenged, "people in Silicon Valley, you think they give two shits who that replaces, or how many resources that shit takes? They couldn't. It's why they made their bunkers and all that, just in case it all goes wrong. They know, that the second it does, we'd have them by their throats."

"I'd protect you," it was an instinctual thing for her to say. And, normally, you'd be glad to hear it - to know that, no matter what, she had your back. Here, though, it did the opposite.

"I don't think you can. Not from this."

"Why?"

"Because it's nature, C. Human kind, the ones with the power, trying to impose itself upon nature, be the top dog. Nature always wins. I don't think you can stop that."

"I'd make sure you got out ok."

"And go where?"

"I have a ship. And I'm basically immortal. I saved some of the Skrull with Kamala when their new home get destroyed. I will save who I can here."

"You couldn't save everyone."

"I know," she hated to admit it, "but I'd save who I could."

You gave her a sad smile, "I know you would. But not everyone in your league is like you."

She tilted her head, "they don't have ships or are immortal. Together, you could tear the whole damn thing down, and help us all start again, better. Fairer."

"Stark used his money to help people."

"He shouldn't of had that much money in the first place. No one needs nor deserves that much money when someone else is out on the street."

"So you're saying he should've of?"

You sighed, stood up, and paced a bit, "I'm saying that no one, especially people with an ego the size of a clown's arse pocket," she had a small twitch at the lips at your way with words, "should have access to that amount of money. Nothing should be worth that much. No one should be above someone else."

You looked at her, clicking your fingers a few times before sitting down and putting a hand over her's, "what you mean to people, like the people who want you to sign stuff or something - or the people you help - that's good. Symbols are important. But...the way SHIELD can use you, that's not so great. They're at the top with their cushy jobs, doing whatever the President says is the right thing to do at the time. Only time I respected Cap, was when he broke off from them with the accords and before the whole HYDRA thing. That's a person, I can get behind. Might not like the mantel, but Steve Rogers, even with where we'd disagree, hell yeah."

You clicked your tongue, "Stark only changed because he saw what his weapons did. He was taken to 'the other place', to where they were made, and saw first hand the damage they did. That's the story I heard anyway. So, he did things different post then. Fine, glad he did. But, if he never did, do you think he would've?"

She shook her head.

"I loved Maria," your voice shook at your deceased sister, and you squeezed Carol's hand as you knew she missed her too, "and I always loved her, but not what she did. Not what she was a part of. Bombing people. I mean, christ, you were testing out a new jet just to get to things faster. Burn up more fuel and --"

Carol hated seeing you like this, getting worked up. But, she tightened her hand on yours, trying to ground you.

"All the war and destruction -- I mean, shit, the amount of pollution and everything...Hala had a dying sun and lack of water. We'll have water we can't drink and places too hot to live or underwater. I'm just --"

You looked to her, eyes full of fright, "I'm just scared, Carol," your voice cracked, "you fight the big fights up there, and fine - we defend ourselves. But...you never fight the big bad down here. The people who make these groups. You ignore that one. Some companies? Sure. But never anything but that. Lip service, half the time. You speak out about, but do you do anything about it?"

She was silent. You nudged your head to your phone, "I get a bit more than most people would, and they ain't even being kept going by SHIELD. Some people's jobs might not even fully cover what I get. And, I get it because I'm related to you? How's that fair?"

Carol took a sip of her own beer. It had been a lot to hear, but she was glad she did. She seemed to know that you were thankful of it, too. No going back, but she was glad you did.

"I'm sorry," she said, "I'm sorry -"

"Hey, no, no" you said, squeezing her hand, "no, it's not just you, ok? It's not an individual thing. Alright, fuck that. It's why we need community, Carol. That's what keeps us going. I know I've got you when I need you, and vise versa, minus the no powers thing," she snorted, "but, you can't fully make change on your own. It takes community."

"All shouting in one voice..."

"Exactly. It can be use for good or bad, but yeah."

There was a pause, as you both recollected yourself.

"I love you," you said, "always, you know that. And I love what you all can mean to people; the hope, the idea of a better tomorrow, safety and all. But...it just feels sometimes, that you aren't fully doing that, you know? Sure, you help people out --"

"But we don't with what causes those things in the first place," it was a lot for her to take in, and she wasn't sure she agreed with all of it, but she could see that sense now. What you were trying to go for.

"There you go," you said, a slight teasing edge to your voice as you could tell she didn't fully agree.

Something then popped into her head, "hey, uh, there's a shelter that's near town. They have some volunteer stuff there. Did you wanna maybe go down together?"

You nodded with a smile, "I'd like that."

Carol nodded, she would.

"Oh, and I can also -"

You put your hand up, "you can't fix everything on your own."

"...But I have super powers. Isn't that like the whole point? I can do things no one else can, so I use them for good?"

You tilted your head to the side, bottom lip sticking out; she did have a point.

"Sure," you conceded, "but, as much as I'd like to hear on the news of you taking out all the guys who caused it," she chuckled - as she would do it, if it would instantly fix everything - "that'll come later. Right now, we just do what we can, Carol and Y/N Danvers. Then build it up from there."

Carol nodded, "build it up from there."

You were still scared about the things, the big issues in society and the web of connections they all shared. Hell, even Carol did. She saw them when she was young, but now with older eyes, she saw them even more so.

She'd still fight the galactic fights, that was where she was needed; but she was also needed here, fighting the smaller - but still impactful - fights. There was still time to help, to attempt to do what she could.

She'd use it better now. Maybe not exactly an even split, but a split none the less.

AN// I don't know if I'm thrilled with how this turned out. I like it, and I think it got across all my anxieties about things, and how I like hero culture (IE. Comics and Movies/Shows) addressing these things and sometimes even having really good commentary on them, but how not all of it does this, you know? It does lip service without offering any alternates, if that makes sense?

Anyways, hope you enjoyed! <3

[oneforthemunny]

comfort character - kit Keller ( a league of their own) saw this movie as a kid and was like damn she’s just like me 💀

extrovert vs introvert - definitely an extrovert I talk a lot

biggest turn on - paying attention even if I’m ranting about the dumbest thing

biggest turn off - guys with an Andrew tate mindset 🤢

zodiac sign (for funsies ofc) - Gemini 😗

so I'm going to do a kind of shocking one but... older!dilf!eddie.

number one, a league of their own makes me ugly sob. we had to watch it in my women's history class and I guess with the understanding of the times when they're reading the list of who made it and who didn't and they help the girl who can't read??? SOB. I LOVE WOMEN.

anyways, but I chose older!eddie for a lot of reasons. he obv used to be wild (you're a real one if you remember the pre-gina/gina period whore days blurb lol) and he's calmed down but he still can have fun. like a lowkey extrovert. he's spent a lot of time alone, so if you want to talk all the fucking time??? he's here for it. and one thing about that man right there, he loves gossip. you want to rant?? he's here for it, hanging on every word. knows better than to give that rational stupid ass man advice too that they do, like no shut up I need to get it out of my system. and he might be old school, but baby, he thinks women are the greatest creations on the planet. like he witnessed birth fr and even though gina was awful like... she gave him brielle and it was horrendous to watch that he was in awe. he just loves women period, and doesn't understand the "treat them like shit" mentality bc??? are you dumb lol???? he's confused by that truly. he's a virgo and gemini virgo compatibility can be good, very grounding and level headed, and a healthy relationship <3

[tibby]

Hey, I saw your post about how movies are really terrible these days! I love to hear people rant, so want to elaborate? (Btw, you can post this publicly. Idc)

i guess at the end of the day it just comes down to the fact that there's a difference between bad movies that are fun to watch and that nobody cares much about and bad movies that are exhausting to watch and are shoved down your throat and we're unable to criticise. which is the general state of things today. hollywood has always had a problem with capitalism and monopoly and producing bad shit but it used to be more escapable and also like. nobody was expecting you to take friday the 13th part viii: jason takes manhattan seriously and kane hodder wasn't getting mad because people didn't think it was citizen kane or whatever. like we realised the studio system was bad and dismantled it and now disney is owning everything but cannot be criticised and it just sucks as someone who loves film and wants to work in it. because it is disheartening to be told by people who work in the industry and who are paid to encourage and teach aspiring filmmakers that it's harder than ever to get a film distributed and working some shit job on a disney movie SPECIFICALLY is one of the few ways someone without connections can even get their foot in the door these days. like i don't care that these movies are bad i care that they're sucking the life and future out of an industry that already had countless problems and fucking paid film critics throw hissy fits if people don't like tom holland's spiderman or what fucking ever. like if you don't understand the difference between shit back in the day and shit now then you're being deliberately obtuse.

anyway this is all to say that i think everyone, especially those being fucking morons on my post, should just watch followers (2021) now streaming on tubi if they want to experience what a modern day bad movie SHOULD be like. starring people you've never heard of, a dumb plot, bad jump scares, a character named jonty, existing on fucking tubi, etc etc, but having one of the greatest - nay, the greatest villain reveal/speech of all time.

[mymanymerrymuses]

Here's we go I am talking about Kagari. I'm putting this under a read more because he's had a bad life, and I'm likely to say a LOT here so, read it if you want to, it contains some important information about my takes on him as a character. Mostly...it's just me ranting about bad things he went through and why I like him so much.

Here is my biggest thing about Kagari. I have seen people in the fandom say that he's clearly a psychopath, and that makes me very angry. He is definitely NOT a psychopath.

Here's what he is.

-He's curious. Kagari, to me, has always been the kid that would open drawers and snoop through them. Not to steal, just to see what was in there. He would open doors just to see if they were locked. When he's older, isolated, often shut into his flat, it switches up a little. He likes to watch movies with explosions in, and he likes to know how they made those explosions look good. He likes to play video games and find all the way the player can die, just so he knows. He does NOT then kill the player character over and over again because it's funny to watch, he just wants to know the boundaries!

-He's good at his job. Now part of this is his nature, (he DOES think the same way some criminals do, though for him it's mostly his curiousity and nothing malicious), and part of it is how hard he worked when he found out that he could be an enforcer. Kagari was put into isolation when he was FIVE YEARS OLD. He spent his formative years alone, in a cell. Being an enforcer is not a nice job. They get sent out after criminals the police couldn't find, or that seem too dangerous. Being an enforcer means being disposable. The world doesn't care if Kagari gets killed on duty - in fact, the handlers are MEANT to shoot him if he steps out of line. But that is still better than spending the rest of his life in a prison cell. At least as an enforcer, he gets to interact with people. So when he found out that he could get that chance, he worked his ass off to get it, proving he could follow orders flawlessly, and get the work done. And he DOES get the work done. Kagari can and does accurately predict where criminals will be and what they will do.

-He's NICE. ....but, he isn't a pushover. At his core, Kagari is friendly. He's missed out on human interaction for most of his life, and he wants to make up for that. When Akane arrive, Kagari wants to talk to her right away, and he's very open with her when they do talk. When she decides to get to know the enforcers better, he cooks her a lovely meal (which is partly because he hasn't had chance to cook for people and he is proud of his skills, but it's also to be nice), shares wine with her, and they have a good time. He likes to play with the other enforcers, and joke around - extending that to the handlers too - because even if they're technically colleagues, he wants to be friends. But he's not afraid to tell those same people when he thinks they're being dumb. He wants to be friends with Akane, but also tells her he'll hate her if she takes her freedom for granted. That sounds fair to me. He's being a little harsh, but honestly, that's his boundary. He cannot be around people who act like their freedom means nothing, or that making a decision is such a hardship. (Of course, sometimes it IS hard to make decisions, but when Kagari has never been allowed to make ANY choices about his life, it's understandable that he'd be annoyed when people complain about it).

-HE DOESN'T WANT TO HURT PEOPLE. Until he DOES. See, this is where I've seen people talking about Kagari being a psychopath, and it really annoys me. Kagari says himself that he's never wanted to hurt anyone, at all. He has never, once in his life, wanted to commit a crime, especially a violent one. That, nobody can really argue, it's right there, he spells it out very clearly. And also spells out that he's happy the people who made the system that damned him are killing each other. I don't think that's just for some sense of revenge. They took his life. They RUINED it, when he was five years old and totally innocent. They've done that to other people too. He's seen it, he's met some of them. He wants the system gone, because it hurts people. Not because he wants to be free to do whatever evil comes to him. In the first episode he's the one to find the criminal, a man who has kidnapped a woman. I have seen people saying that because Kagari didn't immediately rush in and stop the kidnapper from assaulting his victim, CLEARLY he didn't care at all. He 'wasn't affected by it', so he must be a psychopath.

Except, here's the thing. Kagari, at this point, has been an enforcer for three years. Odds are, he's seen scenarios like this before. He is, at this point, mentally equipped to deal with these things. Like a paramedic arriving on scene to find somebody's been attacked and has major wounds, he can put himself in 'work mode' and deal with it, without any big reactions like yelling or crying about it. Kagari HAS to stay calm, because if he doesn't, very bad things happen. First of all, he could ruin the entire job and they wouldn't actually stop the criminal they're after. Secondly, part of the handlers' job is to keep the enforcers in line. They are literally called HOUNDS, Kagari is HOUND 4, they follow orders and that's that. If they don't, the dominators get turned on them, and they are, at BEST, temporarily paralysed.

And Kagari ASKS if he can stop the assualt. He ASKS if he can shoot the guy (with the dominator, which would have, at that point, paralyse him so he could be taken in and contained safely) and his handler says NO. Kagari doesn't let the assualt continue because he's happy to let it happen. He has to follow orders. He does not have a choice. He WANTS to stop the guy, even if that comes at the cost of hurting him, but he can't. I could keep going, but this is already VERY long so I'm going to wrap it up and say that yes, Kagari could put the skills he's learned as an enforcer to use in committing crimes. But he doesn't want to. He wants to be free. That's it. He wants the freedome to go to the shop and buy what he needs to make nice food. He wants to flirt with cute people and watch action moves. He wants to live in a flat that doesn't have cameras in every room.

And I don't think any of that makes him a bad person, let alone a freaking psychopath.

[hanzi83]

Jerry Springer Like Society

It is one of these being written late at night/early in the morning because there are always topics that fuel me and I get to carried away having these thoughts and envisioned conversations in my head about how to explain my fucking point and then when all of these ideas and potential rants I want to go on, I become unfulfilled with not being able to jot all these thoughts down and by the time I want to write shit down, I might not feel as fueled, so I know before I go into this diatribe, it will be another case of scattered brain shit plus I have to put disclaimers that not everything I write or say is an official fact, I will admit I take patterns that I see over and over and then try to analyze that shit even if my style is not for everyone but the inspiration for this blog is the legacy of Jerry Springer and I remember I was never fully into it, because it felt like even more of a parody then the show that parodied it, you know that show Night Stand with the cohost Dick Deidrick, but I would watch here and there, I used to actually dig it when they had some genuine shit on there but even as a wrestling fan back then, which is funny me saying this, but this was way too over the top and transparent for my taste.  So I was reminded of different clips, any fandom you are part of online, Jerry Springer was involved in some way with all of them, so it is like twitter does a best of the show or celebrity and post it online as we sit there as sitcom characters reminiscing as the clip concludes but then you have  some people calling out Springer for what he helped normalize, because for some reason some people think normalizing and catering to the racism, misogyny, homophobia is completely okay and you shouldn’t get in trouble for tasteless shit because it is just entertainment, and I used to have that mind frame, and I don’t just align with any establishment liberal who will make that point while doing their own shit that is dirty because everyone in the system has some baggage that will be used against them. Anyways, I am seeing all these clips of him and forgot how over the top and really edgy it was, or at least perceived edginess because it doesn’t seem like the establishment’s type of entertainment despite being the establishment itself, but we are not supposed to point that shit out. So the reason why I wanted to attempt to write something competent about this, I don’t think it is going too well because anytime I attempt to sound like I am smart, it always backfires. I don’t think I am smart in the traditional sense and that is fine but we as a society give ourselves a pat on the back for not being like the entertainment was in the late 90’s and early 2000’s because we clean up the actual television and movies and normally when the establishment might embrace diversity or inclusion, moreso diversity more so than inclusion, it is normally meant for the other system shills online to manipulate the narratives to gain favor for the elite and trying to make people more regressive. But to me, my personal opinion is that the entertainment we have consumed over the last 30 years have manifested into our reality where we are the reality show, the entire show is sports entertainment. It has elements of Howard Stern Show, Jerry Springer and WWE. Now this is where it gets tricky because there are countless examples and angles I can connect with this,  I don’t compile information of what is put out there because it becomes too much for my brain to retain, I normally learn about shit and think when I need the information, magically I can think of it and suddenly the mental state unloads a bunch of information, they extract it. I will fully admit I am not the smartest person on this planet, and it has become clear when you look at the decisions I have made for the majority of my life. But the thing is when I proclaim I am someone who has been dumbed down and didn’t know how to think, most people would feel embarrassed and are afraid to feel vulnerable because as soon as you show any weakness, the never ending vultures who scout shit, will pile on and drive you crazier. But the reason why I can state this and not give a shit as much about how people, at this point, will perceive me is because I can admit that I have been easily manipulated like a lot of people,  because if I was born into this world and didn’t want to seem less than smart, I would go with what society or the media told me, because these people are experts, but if you asked me “Can you explain why earth is round” I could regurgitate the scientist shit that I have heard repeated and even if that is true, I am only siding with it because that is the fact, which is why if someone else comes along and uses shoddy science or some alternate shit, people will then gravitate, people who gravitate from ideology to ideology,  are people who are in the same boat as me and don’t know how to express it because it is easier to seem like you are with the smartest people but still not knowing. If I had to force a pop culture reference, and since I am not up to date with the latest pop culture shit, but a lot of us feel like Joey from Friends when his smarter friends are talking about history etc, so we have to buy an encyclopedia so we can seem smart. And there are genuine people who do want to educate people but a lot of them from what I see, don’t have patience for people being stupid but it is like why would you want to be a thought leader and an educator if you can’t deal with people asking you a lot of questions, and sometimes I think these purity test mother fuckers out there enjoy having the knowledge and you savor it but then if someone says stupid shit then you want to just shit on them. I am talking about funded accounts, actual genuine people who legit don’t know any better and I can empathize with that, but a lot of the propped up figures on social media and online are more my issue because those people are definitely paid to act fucking dumb while not wanting to be bothered since they have to pose an expert but you don’t want your kayfabe broken. This is how I view this entire discourse world we live in. And sometimes I feel like smart people who boast about it nonstop, don’t even know how to explain shit to a dumbed down person, being smart should make you realize you might need to dumb it down to get the message to the masses. But then again what do I know,  I am not exactly smart so I should just expect you to know all the answers. 

So when I think about shit like the Jerry Springer show, and people thinking we are in a better society today than yesteryear, it becomes laughable, but if you don’t focus on specific individuals and you actually  look at all in a grand view, you can’t see how our world is like the Jerry Springer show, Howard Stern Show, or Sports entertainment. Jerry Springer would have the most random and low brow storylines, and that literally gets propped up and we established the villains, and we let the villain run amok until Jerry has to reveal we got an opinion from that person’s family member or friend and now we have that with a lot of the villains, like we have Elon Musk and Tim Pool playing villains then we then bring out someone from their life to expose them for being hypocrites and they don’t care, Steven Crowder working an angle where him treating his wife like shit, and having that long list on his resume of what he has done that makes him a hypocrite. I know we are supposed to call the villains out but you are willing to lie to your base and act like this is not what Crowder wanted exposed, what exactly is gonna happen to the fucking guy? Nothing. He might leave the publication he is part of but he will rebrand. But how do we in society not see that we are manifesting shit and making our world a fucking entertainment reality show. People online want to be the studio audience and hopefully they will have Jerry come to their side in the audience to ask a question or make an edge lord comment, people are constantly boasting about how progressive shit is but it feels like we are regressing and we don’t realize it. We constantly have people say dumb shit for the studio audience online to laugh at how stupid this person is, and we then make them the star, we take the concept of the marketing behind William Hung and amplified that shit on some energy drink that some MMA person is promoting mixed with the cocaine stash from most of these billionaire mixed with some super serum and we have repeated it, and everyone wants to do viral shit even if they are taking L’s, because it creates nonstop profited off discourse. It will keep going over and over. The guest on the talk show who doesn’t have anything positive to say other than screaming shit out would represent what MTG is kind of doing in these hearings and it will get worse, and one day soon there will be violence in these sports entertainment places the same way you see on that Jerry Springer show, there will be another mentally ill and disabled people going viral so we can make them modern day wack packers. And we really have to be on this high horse about being better than the previous generations. I have never seen an era be so forced to cater to people who consumed edgy entertainment and didn’t get to live out their fantasies so now they are in west world where they are living out their fantasy of what they want to become. It just puts it in perspective how much this world is literally manifested entertainment. We have used that power plus there could be prominent funding for shit like this. And the people who introduce these people to the public sphere have to cut all ties so they don’t have to admit they cosigned the entertainment, like how Vlad TV will shit on Charleston White, why do people who end up getting platformed by him ending up having this negative trajectory. We don’t want to realize our entertainment has been funded by government agencies. I feel when we take situations about the sports entertainer and their resume as the defining issue of the systemic problem, it feels like it gets more coverage than actual people who are not as known, or don’t have that clout, so we tell ourselves we are holding these people accountable but then it always goes to the entertainment portion because we need nonstop comedy because this world hasn’t had enough of that, you can’t even be funny in the most realistic and genuine way now, you have to cater to different sides, the right wing will only think whatever they agree with will be funny and same with certain sections of the left, they are willing to throw their guard whenever a celeb is showing liberal leaning bias but we don’t think that is possible for the normalized right wing behavior. 

That is why when someone like Lance Storm, who chimes into the wrestling takes to downplay racism in WWE and use the justification of bad tasting television is not illegal, but wouldn’t there be some case if there was consequences for someone who pushed back against these racist stereotypes, I am not specifying Lance as a main example, but his was the most recent tweet from him to defend WWE from tasteless television, like people like him want credit for acting like they denounce that kind of thing but then don’t see how racist stereotypes were implemented into the systemic programming, kind of like a systemic initiation, of having to get hazed, but now the talents themselves might not do it. That’s why these companies probably hire social media personalities to do the mental hazing by constantly creating chaos and bullying other cogs and pretend that cog is the real villain because they are famous, while these other shit head cogs are being funded by the billionaires, that is what my trolls used to do it me, they think they could prod a mentally unstable person being fucked with, and because I know there is more behind just basic trolling and it is designed to drive me insane by mocking me and bringing up how the show treats me, they want an extreme reaction and I would give it to them and they act like they are the victims because they are the “customer” so they are always right, but when they are given incentive to do that shit. So how can I not think this tasteless entertainment that has spiraled into the personal lives of these people is not rooted in government propaganda or fundamentalist mafia level shit, that is why they limit the offense for WWE, because we will all just laugh at the racist ideas, some will love them and some will mock the idea of how shitty these are, but I guess the wrestling community can only recognize government propaganda when it comes from Saudi Arabia, that is a a western speciality, that shit can only be problematic and agenda filled if it comes from a foreign entity or maybe something to with a liberal agenda. Then for some reason you throw hip hop under the bus before any other entertainment as the most destructive entertainment out there. If we actually explained the possibilities of what kind of shit these institutions organize and partake in, the conversation would be a little bit different, you notice how the conversation around this racist fiasco with WWE isn’t to have characters to counter this shit and actually have more substance, actually allowing performers in kayfabe to acknowledge this industry has ties to racism, misogyny, homophobia, and some of the homophobia implemented is from other closeted self hating human beings who would rather use his power to generalize and alienate a community because they don’t want to look inward that they are that way. Like if you are closeted, nothing wrong with it because maybe you don’t want to deal with scrutiny but when it comes from people who are powerful and have a Tony Soprano complex, and you are not dealing with your issues and you use it to punish people, then yeah some shit needs to be fucking analyzed. We still live in a very misogynistic world within wrestling, where the effort is put toward purposely sabotaging women in particular, because the discourse is now the storyline if more sports entertainment accounts who are posing as experts to tell you why women don’t deserve more time or more character development. WWE/AEW shills will shit on someone like Trinity for going to Impact, maybe someone wants to have some good creative before they sign to a big company again, plus acting like Impact and other smaller companies are not feeder systems to the bigger companies is hilarious, so they know she will eventually go there but the shills have to even sabotage that shit because they are hateful she isn’t going there fast enough, why should any woman want to go if these are the kind of shills the system has hired, like these people play with other people’s careers and the only women they do back, are ones they have personal relationships with or maybe they stop by at their group chat so the deviants can act horny on main for them. Especially when that is how some people who are shills market the women solely because they don’t have any ideas on how to create compelling women characters. Impact isn’t always the best booked show, but they have more character development for people there than what AEW does, because instead of using this time where talent is not all there as far as big male names, they wouldn’t dare take a chance to get more women storylines and character development on the show. Even with this Collision and Dynamite storyline, this is not gonna be something to make talent better, it will be fueled by the sports entertainers online to relive Smackdown vs Raw and basically declare Dynamite with Elite/BCC the Triple H brand and Collision with CM Punk, the Smackdown 6 brand. The effort is put into rebooting that shit instead of coming up with better ways to use the women properly. Like what are AEW shills gonna write for Trinity that will be compelling more so than what Impact does for her? She has a big ass? More worked shoot shit with Britt Baker? The effort goes into creating more problems than actually coming up with solutions. Attitude era brain has ruined a lot of people, because now instead of saying that on a grand view, there are big plans, we have to make it seem the filler is filled with down time so we create more discourse, like why would you want all these wrestlers to do attitude era shit where they all interact and you blow through matches, like I am glad someone like Joe is not interacted with Bryan or Punk etc, because those moments shouldn’t just be throwaways. We are putting more effort into watering shit down like the attitude era than we are for solutions for booking errors that don’t need to actually exist, they have been made to exist. Like wanting a new TBS champion because maybe the current one has not been booked the best and maybe the whole undefeated streak and being the only champion will put hindrance on her career growth if the character doesn’t deal with struggle and becoming more aggressive and meaner since the streak will be done. So when people don’t have any other booking ideas other than just keep her undefeated, I really don’t think those kinds of people actually care for the actual division and how to grow it but they just want their favorite to have super Cena booking. You have to remember other employed accounts online will only back you up and cosign your matches etc if they get a piece of the action. It is like a fantasy league and when you have more people doing that, then how can any of these products grow, that shit has seeped into politics and other forms of entertainment. We are that exploitative with it. I know I am all over the place, but basically this is examples of how we want to keep patting ourselves on the back for thinking we are acting progressive but people with power have control to still disguise regression so it is constantly existing in the public sphere. I hate the notion of the dangerous shit that has been done in these industries, after shaming us after the Benoit shit where people were not used to the watered down nature etc, but then they start doing unsafe shit over the last decade and then the wrestlers ensure us they know better and they can handle it, people were alarmed by that Cody headshot back in 2019 and people were concerned, they tried to say it was gimmicked, and more of this shit became normal with unsafe shit, and people seem fine with it in the industry so now you trained the audience to embrace it, and now industry dipshits and ones affiliated are gonna blame the fans solely when none of you can blame the billionaire masters who run this shit, did the fucking fans decide to turn Darby vs Jeff Hardy into a hardcore match, when it could’ve been fine as a normal match and it did have stakes to it in that it was for the Owen Hart cup? I didn’t realize the bloodthirsty fans were the ones who had the power to book that match, was it the bloodthirsty fans who didn’t know how to set  fucking table properly for a spot that fucked up Ana Jay’s neck? No, it was the people running it. Yeah you can get mad at shit head fans who are bloodthirsty much like how society was when shows like Jerry Springer were around, but the system encourages that kind of shit. 

I know people think I am trying to come off as a savior or some shit. I am not a fucking savior but it doesn’t mean I have to go about life doing the cookie cutter shit that everyone ends up doing once they get their gigs and access. It feels like society with our favorite entertainment was fueled by that but now are expanding on that shit, which is why this Jerry Springer shit made really think, and now I can’t stop because I am writing fucking blogs that probably don’t make any sense. The ironic thing is people think I will be running my mouth and I think I will never suffer any consequences for things I put out there, even with the disclaimers, but this is how one dimensional everyone’s view is to think punishment should only come in physical form, but the reason I have been able to reflect and go off on the things I have gone off on, is because I was punished and made to look like a complete failure. I am not declining that I am not to blame on some level, I will take some of the accountability but the system by nature destroys people, and they never have to take any accountability, they embrace people who will give up their leverage and put it all on them because the system is not expected to take any responsibility despite encouraging and organizing shoddy behavior. I have been punished, you know how sick in the head some of these powerful people have to be to hate me so much for not selling my soul at the right time, because I had a fucking conscience, where now they get int people in my life’s ear and make me rely upon them so I am treated as a child living his parents basement, not allowed to find work in the entertainment industry at all, people you know making backdoor deals, me being brought out with no social leverage where I had to take past friends shit of having a better life, being in better positions of vacations, weddings, hanging out with celebs etc all to be rubbed in my face and putting me through purity tests and then these people can pretend they never did anything mean because they helped me out or invited me to limited gatherings. You don’t think that was an incentive given from higher up in the world. Different people with platforms who are connected would also use me for their shows and treat me like a guineapig, I know because Bully Ray basically runs that show now, but me being a high profiled caller on Stern Show helped Busted Open get on the fucking map, and even with good radio, they started doing their Howard Stern shit, and the funny thing is Bully Ray would shit on me at the behest of Stern, and Stern wouldn’t even admit he knows the guy and he would generalize your profession, and no one in that world would ever say shit to him about it. I have had other trolls and other alt media platforms try to recreate Howard Stern level shit and they thought I would embrace it because someone who was famous can’t handle not being relevant, and yes I have not been able to handle it well since fame became a fucking drug, but now I am at the point where I don’t give a shit if I make it ever. I could die a pathetic person, but you mother fuckers will never heal properly being in that fucking world. You know how horrible this entire world would have to be if my solution and desire is to opt for assisted suicide, because if the world has a bright future instead of a really fucked up fundamentalist dystopian nightmare, maybe I wouldn’t want to be dead. That is how horrible the world is getting. But don’t say  I don’t suffer consequences, I have taken mental abuse after mental abuse for so fucking long and guess what, at the end of it all, these trauma and this suppression and my ultimate demise doesn’t count on the purity test for me to be seen as someone who should get vindication. Maybe if I decided to go more right wing, some of the people could boost up my trauma and get me vindication but then I would have to support regressive shit but I am so desperate to get some empathy for my trauma, one would think I would do that, which is why people who have been fucked with from a powerful person, they had to cosign with some of the right wing and some of the post left people, because if that person still didn’t like what the right wing was doing and didn’t want to blindly defend Putin, none of those would give a shit. So people who don’t think I suffer any consequences, you can eat shit because sooner or later when the system screws you over and they will, I hope no one believes you the same way no one believes me and let’s see if that is not really suffering like it isn’t suffering when it comes to what I have been through. People in my position normally are so tortured mentally they don’t know how to articulate it properly. They are afraid of how it might sound, but when you are immune to people thinking you are crazy, you feel a bit more comfortable. I didn’t decide to be a discredited conspiracy theorist, you bestowed that upon me so I would not be taken seriously but you don’t like how I can weaponize it back? So punishing me in this regard where I am a red flag person that can’t be interacted with to keep me isolated locally but also now not having a “fan base” so I am alone and miserable with my own thoughts, is not considered punishment enough for people, because the “smart” shills of the system will still dumb down the game and not talk about how advanced it all is. So all my issues have to be seen as an only me issue that no one helped orchestrate, I have taken blame for shit I haven’t done, if you followed my fucking journey over the last 15 years you know what mind space I have been in for periods in my life and you have seen me come out smarter each time from it. Trust me there is someone out there dedicated to monitoring your every movie and having it on record so they can use it against you later, which is why some of these shills have become agents that are being forced into being a hypocritical mess. 

At the risk of sounding even more stupid. I want to give my thought process so you can get the perception of the dumbed down guy so maybe some of you in smart positions can educate mentally ill conspiracy theorists like me, since you all want to be thought leaders and pretend you are smarter than everyone. Is this Green New Deal shit good or bad? Now if you know all the answers already, you are gonna shake your head and maybe copy and paste this to someone to make fun of in a text message or something. When it comes to the environment, I recognize it is one of the most important issues on the planet but it is one of the most boring topics on the fucking planet. Back when I was a cookie cutter conspiracy theorists, people would limit narratives and conspiracy framing, like “If MSM says Climate Change is real and dangerous, then we have to say that it doesn’t exist or it is not happening” like there isn’t more nuanced thought that go to expand upon it. Like I explained before because I don’t understand science and only believe what the scientists say and I will just repeat their talking points, if someone comes to me with other alternate facts, I am going to start leaning over there because that person might have credibility to me now since he questioned 9/11 which apparently you are not allowed to do, but for some reason you can still piece together that Saudi Arabia had something to do with it, but wouldn’t US still having relations with them and presidents cozying up them wouldn’t that still be just as much a justification to think it is an inside job, but okay whatever but I am noticing now that we all agreed that the green new deal would be a good solution, I don’t know how since I am dumb as shit but I am listening to people on the left tell me how good it is, so now that I know TYT is slowly moving more to the right and you have Ana Kasparian pushing back against it because of some examples of how regular people can’t afford those kinds of vehicles or stoves etc, now as a dumbed down person who consumed their media, I would be like “Okay I guess I have to kind of be suspect of the green new deal now beause a fair ‘leftist’ in Ana Kasparian is pushing back at it” now if I knew about this shit, maybe I could get my own answers but am I to believe she is lying and buying into sensationalized right wing talking points or was elements of the green new deal suspect, and it was designed to get pushback, but it was also a way for people like TYT to contine to find a way to pivot more to the right wing. See I am asking as a dumbed down person, this is how I process the information and guess what, there are lot of other dumbed down people who probably feel like I feel, but they are hanging out with different political minds who are repeating talking points, and those points could be true, but they wouldn’t exactly know themselves. See this is why we live in an era where people know the world is imploding and they all want to partake in the conversation and they think because one show is credible, that everything they say has to be credible so you will agree with them despite taking in propaganda. This is how my whole life has been and the reason I bought into various amounts of propaganda. This is why I don’t want to be here because I know I will be susceptible to that shit because propaganda will keep sophisticating itself and come in all shapes and forms in the future. Like I am not saying you shouldn’t call out democrats for the shit that is happening but when I feel people in powerful positions know where the world is going and they gimmick how they are “fair” then I know that they could be easing their way to come into the right wing because ultimately the right wing trajectory that exists in the system will get their official face for what represents them, which is someone like a DeSantis or Trump. But even that political shit is become its own Jerry Springer show, because if the world is supposed to implode and that is the intention of it, all of the shit being said on the surface is filler until we just get there so someone is gonna say some stupid shit that will get dunked on while the people dunking on establishment people are now collaborating with Christian fundamentalists because on the surface they said some anti war shit. The system by design is making it obvious of what they are doing, but people online and alternate media are acting like they are the only ones pointing out corruption and hypocrisy and that act used to have legit organic shit behind it maybe 10-15 years ago, but now it has become another personality trait that someone says so you don’t question their credibility. I can’t question Aaron Mate because Jimmy Dore wears a stupid hat and talks down to me about how he is an award winning journalist. Well guess what Owen Hart stole a slammy when he was supposed to present for best bowtie. Like 10-15 years ago, if you told me the US wants people too support Ukraine and get behind this war, but since then people have exposed how these wars in Iraq etc were illegal wars, and this was designed to be put out there as a narrative, because while we think they are running the same playbook and they are making it more obvious etc, but what if the playbook advanced, because people think that Putin has invaded US democracy and that is the only way that he can be evil in Us Imperialist eyes, but what if my conspiracy theory is that a bunch of neocons and neolibs, who present a pro wrestling country vs country aesthetic, are actually the ones influencing Putin, but the internet thinks they are awoken to this because we recognize the aesthetic of the Iraq war shit, personally I think the US is funding both sides, and the democrats don’t care about the inconsistencies when you bring up other people who are suffering from oppressive regimes, it is kind of like you want to us to not support this shit and end up supporting who the neocons support which is far right wing people in different countries. I am not saying it is true, but I am also allowed to critically think against some of the people in alt media who have shown they dumbed shit down and echo the sentiments of Tucker Carlson being the only anti war guy. Again I am a dumbed down guy who isn’t take seriously but how dare I question alt media, I must be a fucking MSM shill, even though I thnk their shit has been fucking whack for a long fucking time, but that whole value of the MSM now only relies on it for storylines like RJK getting censored for vaccine opinions, because other funded media and accounts on all social media platforms are not gonna talk about it at all, I won’t hear about this on Bill Maher’s show whatsoever right. People have really made it seem like they are all calling out shit when it is just faction warfare taking place.

Even with the AI conversation, if I am of the belief technology has always been advanced and science has been way more advanced, then what makes these accidents with technology more scary is that we have manifested entertainment so much that we are making the narrative of all the crazy shit that is about to happen because of AI when it is most likely that people controlled this to happen, AI could be stopped but they are promoting it now as a big scary thing when the last decade a bunch of the shit you saw or heard has probably been something to do with AI. I used to think it is impossible for artists to go out and do as much shit as they are doing and having the time for all these records, so what is stopping them from thinking the music of the last 10 years was AI as well? Would that be so farfetched? By the way until someone gets Drake to sing Eminem’s Kim, I won’t be sold on it, you gotta do a little better than fucking up Biggie’s original flow so he can flow like Nas on NY State of Mind. I am starting to think Eminem doing that 2pac album was him testing the grounds with AI and completely fucking it up because he was not as experienced. I even think Eminem’s revival is now an AI album, I bet that is where the discourse will go next, that we will find out some of the best albums was all AI done, so now it takes away from their legacy. Imagine if you found out to Pimp a Butterfly was all done by AI, the Drake fans are gonna have a field day and then the Kendrick fans will do a “THIS YOU?” to Drake because we will find out his entire career he has been doing AI music. Am I blowing your mind right now? I know this blog is all over the fucking place, but I did want to get some other thoughts, but I don’t know how to segue into a new topic after I just potentially destroyed potential fandoms spirits with the possibility of their favorites having AI being done for them. Now I am starting to think that Rap God shit by Eminem was also AI. But everything has become a scandal for online shit because we need the kayfabed shit of discovering shit that when it is being permitted to be known so it changes the narrative of shit. Like the information of DeSantis’ surgeon general gimmicking stats so to add to the anti vaccine narrative could’ve been put out there, the fact that isn’t as much being talked about than how the right wing would with Hunter Biden’s laptop, that is why I was never against regular people who were couldn’t get vaccinated and had their reasons etc, I was not gonna be an elitist but there are people who are online and television who are paid to be anti vaccine but we think the money and funding goes to the pro vaccine shit, the right wing has shit handed to them because all you have to do is show people in the system were being shady about something so that person who was exposing the truth gets to be trotted out on alt media about being silenced despite everyone talking about them. Like exposing how Fox News etc has dossiers on people, Howard Stern kind of exposed what high profile celebs do where they get people to build dossiers on people who would report on them to have their lives ruined, but now because it is Tucker Carlson, now it is a bigger deal, I know closet right wingers parading around as the opposite will get mad at me but it is like they are taking the CM Punk method with Tucker Carlson, at least in their booking. The only victim that matters from getting fucked over. I have seen this act with Howard Stern before, and now everyone eats off of that shit. The people who cheerlead Tucker act like he was Austin in 98 going against McMahon. Our entire lives now have turned into this circuit where there is more effort into introducing these characters knowing they are gonna exist in the discourse, and the only thing people on the left have socially is to laugh at the self owning when they are proven to bring a fucking hypocrite. Nothing is gonna happen to that SF fire commissioner who got attacked by a homeless dude but then we got twists and turns of the reveal he was spraying homeless people and was caught on camera, it is like a new way to expose someone but still doing it in a Jerry Springer like way, they are introducing you to these villains, there was a cop exposed of sexually abusing 200 children, I never see any of the “I AM CONCERNED FOR MY KIDS BECAUSE OF DRAG SHOWS”  talk about that, because they only exist to be regressive and they can’t even cop to the fact they sold their soul, they have to act like they are keeping it real by falling for sensationalist shit, but to tie this back into the Jerry Springer shit, we literally created that in modern times while people act like they are condemning it. Kyle Rittenhouse is gonna be a fucking star and we think this is the only example of this happening to. We will boo him and hiss at him, but he is protected by the right wing so while we have pretended we have made the actual fiction we consume seem more progressive, it is like all the script writers and comedy writers are now booking this discourse, the real life WWE, Jerry Springer Show, the new Howard Stern show but with real life consequences of people losing their lives and all for the exploitation because we can’t admit as a society we have a entertainment problem. Sorry I know a lot of you want to recreate the Friends intro with your faction, so this might be hard for you to really take all of this in. Most people probably checked out, but sometimes I think when I used to write, I didn’t know what my identity was really because I was trying to be too much from what I was influenced by but the last few years I have found my identity and I can articulate a bit better than I could before, and I see the world the way I see it, not everyone has to agree with me but for some reason when they don’t agree with me, they get scared that other people might read this and agree. People have looked down upon me for so fucking long that even people from my past think they can undermine me even if they pretend to respect me, a lot of people have gotten worse over time and for some reason it is a big nope from people if I start analyzing everything and everyone in the only way I know how. My words leave scars apparently because if you hate me, you will hate me for not being able to write, or me being a conspiracy theorist, me being someone who is pointing out flaws in society, hate that I am trying to put my thought process out there etc, take your fucking pick, and when you hate me, you will then enact more shit to fuck with me in the future and the best part is you think no one will know, but since I know what a lot of you with power are capable of, you will still hate me because your mind is so poisoned you will opt revenge for making you think and reflect so you will use resources to make me feel more miserable or used advanced ways to fuck with me and don’t worry no one will believe me, so you guys can keep doing it because that is what people who are sociopathic in the system will do. But at least if I have to take that shit, I know my words at least got to you even if you want to admit it or not, you have to act high and mighty for your faction, they can’t see their leaders look weak, even though we are all weak to some degree, but I don’t have a faction to cater to, so I am allowed to be vulnerable and open about my thought process because I know what vulture like people act like when they sense weakness, it actually exposes you a lot more. And if this is all in my head and I am irrelevant, then maybe the forest that this blog resides in will be only meant for the trees and leaves to see and it is for no one else’s eyes. The very least, some powerful people might be impressed with this and they might talk about it, so other cogs in the system will be jealous of it, so they will start amplifying some creative output that will get direct results of getting boosted up. Did I give that away too? Another reason to hate me.

[backseatloversz]

me: so anyway if radio rebel wasn't just a one off hour and a half disney channel movie, i would've loved for them to dive more into stacy & gabe and their dynamics with tara & gavin, respectively. at the end of the movie i think it's really sweet how both of them were redeemed, in a way - tara learning that stacy is just an insecure teenage girl at her core, too, and gabe and the other two .. Gs, backing up gavin during his solo performance of a Deep And Meaningful song at prom - sorry, Morp, even though that's the exact kind of song gabe said their band was NOT about, which led to gavin quitting. (side note: did they, like, used to do that kind of music? and it didnt work out and that's why they changed over to shallow party background music? they all seemed to know almost immediately what to play. or maybe that's just lazy writing from an hour and a half one off disney channel movie). i feel like both dynamics would sort of move in the opposite but same directions going forward; while, at their core, both stacy and gabe would learn to be less shallow, it's likely stacy would do so by becoming friends (or at least being nicer to) tara (and other not popular kids, while she's at it), while gabe would let gavin go do his own thing. (or maybe he'd decide the performance at morp was well recieved enough that their band can shift tone completely and start doing Deep And Meaningful songs, who's to say, though?) maybe they would all become friends at, like, the schools gsa. you know, with the whole mystery radio persona tara is way more confident and likely 'herself' in, and those other two friends of hers for the life of them not being able to figure out which girl at their school it is behind the voice modulator, she could totally be trans. gavin is probably bi, but i don't feel like elaborating. ..so then there's gabe and stacy, and they're obviously both gay, but again, their stories are, like, the same but opposite. gabe is already gavin's friend, and is very incessant on how he should focus on .. (him)the /BAND/, and bossing him around on what kind of girls he should be going after. (also, that scene where gavin quits the band, i dunno it just gave me very breakup vibes). meanwhile stacy, well, she just gives me very carrie from julie and the phantoms vibes - she used to be friends with the main character, (not a part of radio rebel but i just get those Vibes!!) then something changed and now she comes off as a cookie cutter, shallow, straight popular girl who's trying a little to hard to let people know she doesn't care. (i mean, carrie isn't canonically lesbian or anything, either, but you get my point, yea?) stacy is shown listening to radio rebel, and i'll bet there is a part of her that genuinely admires her confidence and wants so badly to listen to her preaches on how people should be their real selves, and respect other people for being themselves, too. but instead blah blah she bullies tara, goes after the guy tara's crushing on because ???, and makes him run for prom king so she can fulfill that High School Experience with some popular cute guy on her arm.

lastly can we please talk about this absolutely metal line of gavins; "i don't want to be king. never did." which was directed at stacy when he was at his fucking limit with her, but was also definitely about the fact that he was sick of gabe's whole "we gotta play the music we know The Fans like cause that's how we'll get bigger and that's the only thing important to me, not writing meaningful music lmao" attitude

my cats, dead asleep on my bed as i pace around my room:

[tendousthoughts]

HQ Boys Calling Their S/O Clingy Pt. 1

Character(s) included: Iwaizumi and Ushijima

Warnings: slight cursing

A/N: so imma try to make this look really pretty and shit. But if you want a pt 2 just put it in my ask box + what characters you want next! So I don’t know what to call this format thingy but anything with the line next to it (like now) is what happened the day before (when they called their s/o clingy) and everything not in that day won’t be! I also just ate like five airhead lmao. Well enjoy! Reblogs & follows are greatly appreciated! My ask box is always open to request, and if you wanna talk or just wanna say something! Please don’t laugh at my grammatical or spelling errors, I’m sorry!

My Masters List: here

My series : here

Credit: @/teesumu

Iwaizumi

When he came home all you wanted to do was hug him. It had been almost a week since he had gotten his new job. He was stressed all the time and never had time for you two alone. So what if you want just hug him for a bit.. you deserve that much right just that much of his time? So he walked in, and your eyes lit up... he was one of the few people you felt safe around. You ran up to him with a big smile and that goofy lovable personality of yours.

“Dinner is ready and then we can cuddle and maybe watch a movie. I have it all planned out!” You smile laughing a bit just imagining how fun it will be. He doesn’t look so amused though.

“I ate already and I am going to bed, y/n.” He didn’t even give you a second to process what he had said instead he just walked away. You follow him to the room you share smiling.

“Oh okay! We can just cuddle then!” You smile a bit and hop onto the bed next to him. Wrapping your arms tightly around him, not too tight, just perfect, you smile. Till you are shoved off. He looked at you with pure annoyance.

“Y/n, can you stop being so fucking clingy. You never stop trying to touch me,” He screamed and you just sat there with tears. God damnit. He was right, wasn’t he? You never gave him space. He turned his back and you turned away too. The tears silently fell.

The morning came faster than it should have. By the time he was awake you were out of the room. He got up and walked out and entered the kitchen.

“Morning y/n, I have the day off so we can do anything you want,” he smiled as he walked in, yet you weren’t there. He searched the whole house and you weren’t there. An hour passed and you walked in.

“Uh hey y/n.. where’d you go? I mean like you weren’t there when I woke up, love?” He smiled and you just gave a soft smile.

“Oh.. um I just went for a random drive for some coffee and drove nowhere for like twenty minutes,” you lied. You love doing that but to be honest you were talking to Oikawa for a bit and ranting to him.

“Oh um.. I have the day off if you just wanna hang out? Maybe go for dinner or something?” He smiles hopefully.

“Uh sure..” you sat far from him on the couch as the movie started. He looked at you and you tried not to pay attention.

“Uh do you need something?” You turn towards him.

“Oh um.. no, never mind,” he looks back at the tv confused. He wanted to cuddle yet was too embarrassed to say so.

Thirty minutes passed by and you were quite distant. “Um do you wanna cuddle or something..?” He smiles hopefully.

“I’m good thanks for asking,” you remain glaring at the tv.

“Um y/n is everything okay.. you’ve been really distant and I know you went to Oikawa’s place yet you told me otherwise..” he looks at you.

You freeze looking at him again, you look like a deer in headlights. Frozen and shocked. You say the first thing that comes to mind which is extremely dumb. “Uh I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You helplessly smile.

He looks at you, shocked. You were a terrible liar yet you still tried to, “why are you lying? I know you were there just tell me.”

“Last night I was thinking that you are right. I am too clingy and I need to give you some space,” you keep your on him “This morning you weren’t up and I just felt like talking so I decided to head out and not bug you.” Your voice breaks as tears roll down your cheeks. Wiping them away quickly hoping he doesn’t notice but it is already too late.

“Y/n... I didn’t mean it,” he feels like absolute shit right now and he doesn’t know what to do. “I..I like how you cling to me and how you just act like yourself. I..I love the sound of your voice so you can always talk to me. I didn’t mean for me to come off so rude to you and hurt you... you mean everything to me. I am so sorry y/n for making you so fucking uncomfortable. This is your house too and I shouldn’t do that to you...” he whispers holding your hands in his as he pulls you closer. Lifting you to his lap.

You try to climb off but his grip just gets tighter in a protective way.

“I’m sorry y/n... I didn’t mean any of that. I will make more room for us to hang out...” He smiles a bit wrapping his arms around your waist. “I love you so much..”

“I..I love you too,” you make out in between heavy deep breaths

Ushijima

You tried to call him multiple times, it was extremely late and you were worried. He normally would text you if he was going to practice a bit longer or he was going to head to dinner with his team. Knowing how worried you get and not wanting you to make him a whole meal when he is full. Yet he never picked up it was probably twelve thirty when he walked in.

He tried to walk in silently but soon found you awake in bed. You smile a bit getting up and giving him a hug. “Hey baby..” you mumble with your sleepy voice “where were you? I was worried sick,” you didn’t sound mad, just concerned. 

He slightly shoved you off making his way to his dresser to change. “Out.” He grumbled a bit.

“Are you hungry? I made dinner..” you smile slightly making your way closer to him.

“Can you just leave me alone? I don’t need you to be so god damn clingy! You’re not my mom and I am a grown ass adult. I don’t need you to stay up wondering where I was!” He took a deep breath calming down. You slowly backed down and just laid at your side of the bed closing your eyes. Slightly thinking about all the “problems” you have.

Morning came and when Ushijima woke up he was later than usual needing to rush a couple of things. You were on the couch, as he came in he looked for something to eat. “Y/n, do you know if there is anything I can eat?” He called out.

“I don’t know you can look, can’t you?” You look up from your computer for a split second before returning to gaze at your computer.

“Uh.. ya. Well bye!” He grabbed a banana and grabbed his stuff. Rushing out the door unsure what had possibly made you so harsh that morning. Forgetting everything he had said the night before.

When he came home it was early and you were already eating while using your phone. “I’m home!” He called.

You just smiled and returned eating. Your eyes locked on back onto your phone. Typing for a second.

“Who are you texting babe?” He smiled as he walked in.

“No one” you put your phone down. The sound of a text came up but you just ignored it walking to put your dishes away and then grabbing your phone to go back to your room.

“Uh.. y/n? You wanna hang out for a bit?” You turn and just shake your head.

“No I’m good thanks though.” You mumble before walking away. Him following close after.

“Are you okay..?” He mumbles as he joins you in bed.

“Ya. I’m fine,” you mumble as you plot your headphones in listening to some music.

He taps your shoulder and you take out one of your earbuds. “What’s going on.. what did I do?” He mumbled.

“I mean I am not your mother so I don’t understand why you need me to hang out with you and be your best friend. I mean I am just too clingy aren’t I?” You burst out.

“What?” He looks at you for a moment remembering the night before. “Wait y/n.. I didn’t me-”

“I don’t care if you didn’t mean it! You made me feel like absolute shit!” You look at him before getting up and heading to the spare room. “You can leave and go out. I don’t give a fuck just leave me alone for a bit.”

He goes to check on you two hours later. When he walks in he finds you crying. “Y/n, can we talk?” He whispered softly in his calming voice.

You look up wiping your tears. “I guess.”

“May I sit on the bed or would you like some space..?” He really didn’t want to make you feel worse then you probably already did.

“I don’t care do what you want,” it wasn’t like you to be so snappy. But you just wanted to get it out of your system. He sat down next to you and slowly reached out his arms. You slowly entered his embrace as he held you tight whispering sweet nothingness into your ear. His words are full of praise and truth.

“I am so sorry I made you feel like that. I should have texted you back. I know that you were just worried,” he rubbed your back slowly, making soft circles. “I don’t find you clingy.. and I like when you take care of me. You mean the world to me and I am sorry I made you think otherwise..”

Follows and likes are appreciated! Please reblog if you enjoyed it so more people can find my work! Thank you all for your support! Stay safe, and have a good rest of your day!

[withcolebrock]

Lover of Mine- Chapter Thirteen

Lover of mine~5 seconds of summer

Masterlist

Warnings: suggestive language and swears I believe

Word Count: 2,207

Author’s Note: Things are starting to get a bit interesting with these two, finally. The next chapter is where most things start to kick off. But as of right now, dig a bit deeper into the friendship of Jake and Y/N. I do like this chapter and I hope you guys too and I’m sorry it is taking me so long, I have rewrote the ending of this chapter like a thousand times lol. This chapter may feel rushed from the previous chapter but this is a few months after her break up with Mike. Hopefully it will not be confusing.. Anywayssss This is my gif!

“No, that thing is gonna stab my eye out,” Jake groaned while gently pushing her hand away. Y/N sighed while she giggled, she turned her head towards the camera. She lifted her hand towards his eye again before Jake shoved her hand away again. “Isn’t my face fine without it?” he begged while he titled his head back, “My face itches.”

He reached his hand up as he attempted to scratch his skin, “No don’t!” she begged while she took his hand away, “You’ll ruin my work, plus we are almost done you can wait.” she smiled softly towards him while she shifted her gaze back towards the camera.

“Well, what am I supposed to do? It hurts,” he continued to whine. Before she had a chance to respond, her bedroom door was pushed open without warning. Colby stood in the doorway, staring towards Jake and herself.

“Oh, sorry, didn’t realize you were making a video,” He stuttered while he shifted his gaze towards the back of the camera; taking note how close Jake and Y/N were sitting. He pressed his lips together as he held shifty eye contact with Jake and Y/N. “What are you filming exactly?” He cleared his throat.

“Oh I saw Franny do it, she did all of her guy roommates makeup. I thought it was funny,” she explained while she turned her gaze strictly towards Colby. Jake turned his head away from them both as he scratched his skin in desperation.

“That’s cool, didn’t think you’d start with Jake though,” he joked while he tapped his fingers against the door. Y/N smilied awkwardly towards him while she tilted her head to the side. She shrugged her shoulders while she looked away from him.

“He was home, so I had just asked him, it was no big deal,” she explained awkwardly. He nodded. “But we are almost done filming, so if you-”

“Yeah, of course, uh. Yeah see you, yeah-” he shut the door before he could finish his sentence. Y/N and Jake looked towards each other nervously as they sat in a moment of awkwards silence.

She twisted off the mascara and held it towards his face. Jake hesitantly nodded while he stared towards the tube with his eyes slowly squinting. His face twisted slightly as he watched Y/N lean it close to his eye. “Blink slowly,” she instructed.

“Are you guys, like, okay?” Jake asked cautiously after he followed her instructions. He tilted his head back while she closed the mascara tube. She glanced towards the camera.

“You know, I can’t use any of this in the video right?” She avoided the question while she picked up a few of her lipsticks, trying to decide which color would be best for the look she decided.

“So what happened? You guys seemed fine last night,” he shrugged while he pointed towards the black lipstick.

“I’ll tell you later, can we finish this please?” she responded quickly while she raised her eyebrows. A small frustrated sigh leaves her lips while she pretends to hold the lipsticks up again for him to choose. Jake nodded while he took a long breath, to try and get more energy into his system.

“This one,” he said cheerfully while he pointed to the black lipstick. She smiled while she placed the red one down while she began to untwist the matte lipstick.

~~~

She threw away the paper plate while picking up her bottle of water from the counter while she walked towards the stairs, she glanced towards the backyard door. She saw Sam and Colby talking towards the camera Sam was holding. She shook her head, a quiet laugh leaves her lips as she walks up the stairs slowly.

She took a sip of her water bottle while she walked towards Jake’s open door. He was laying on his bed while he was scrolling through twitter on his computer. He lifts his head, seeing her standing in the doorway. “What’s going on with you and Colby?” Jake whispered while Y/N walked into his room. She shut the door behind herself, she sat down beside Jake on his bed.

“I don’t even know, Jake,” she sighed while rubbing her eye delicately while she pulled her lips in between her teeth. “We haven’t hung out in over a month because of Olivia,”

~~~

There were three knocks on her already open door, she pulled off her headphones while pausing the video she was editing. Colby stood in her doorway, glancing towards her bed. He quickly walked into the room. “I rescheduled that date with that girl from the other night,” he said simply.

Y/N held her breath briefly while she spun her chair around to face Colby. Her eyes squinted while she looked Colby up and down. “Okay, that’s good, right?” she whispered, her voice cracked slightly.

“I mean yeah, of course, but like do you think I should still go?” he asked while he rubbed his hands together nervously.

“Yeah, you like her so, why not?” she rushed out while she brushed a few pieces behind her hair. She looked into Colby’s eyes for a moment before turning away towards her computer screen.

“The date is tomorrow, I know it’s on movie night, but-”

“It’s just one night, Colby, go have fun,”

“Are you sure? I mean it’s only been a week since everything with Mike-”

~~~

“And it’s like ever since that night, he has only hung out with Olivia. Which I get it, that’s his girlfriend but you still need to make time for your friends. The whole movie night thing was made in high school so we wouldn’t forget each other when we got into relationships,” she sighs, “It sounds dumb when I explain it,”

“It’s not, I get it. He’s barely home anymore, can’t even make content with the guy. Can’t imagine how Sam feels, being in business with him and all,” he leans back on his hands while maintaining eye contact with her, “But it’s totally Olivia doing that though. She probably can’t be left alone longer than two hours,” he chuckles.

She joins in while shaking her head, “I don’t understand why people drop their friends all because of a relationship, he barely knows her,” she continued to rant to Jake.

“Have you talked to him about this?”

“He’s never home to even talk about it,” she leaned her head back groaning.

“Are you sure, this isn’t anything more?” Jake raised his eyebrow towards her, she huffed while rolling her eyes.

“Have you asked out that girl yet?” she switched the conversation. Jake rolled his eyes while laughing.

“Don’t turn this around on me, that is not fair,” he giggled. “You’re just jealous Colby is dating someone that is not you,” he smiled confidently.

“I still regret ever telling you that.”

They both sat in silence while thinking over everything. She realized that she doesn’t even go to Colby about her problems anymore ever since the night Mike and her broke up. It seemed like her life blew up in shambles and there isn’t a way to return to how she felt before everything happened.

Her eyes lit up as she hit Jake on his arm to grasp his attention. His mouth fell open as he reached over and held the spot where she hit him. “Oh stop that,” she giggled, “You ask out Tara on a date and I’ll talk to Colby about how I’m feeling.”

“Sure, whatever, but what am I supposed to say to Tara, anyway,” he asked.

She spent a while explaining and helping Jake out with what he should tell Tara. Y/N knew that Tara was head over heels for Jake. It took a while to convince him to finally call her. He gave Y/N a thumbs up and she walked out of the room, towards her own. She stopped for a moment to check to see who was sprinting up the stairs.

“Colby, what are you doing?” she asked while she leaned against her door. His head lifted up in shock while looking towards her. His lips curled up into a smile once he saw it was her. He pushed himself off of the final step while he walked towards her.

“I was actually looking for you, I need to talk to you,” he motioned towards her room. She nodded hesitantly while her skin arose in goosebumps. She pushed the door open, allowing Colby to walk into the room and relax down onto her bed.

“I needed to talk to you too, so perfect,” she smiled widely while she shut the door. She sat down on her desk chair. He smiled softly while he leaned back onto his arms.

“Do you have feelings for Jake?” he said out of nowhere. Her eyes widened while she stared towards him. At first she didn’t know if she misheard the words that fell from his lips.

“Sorry?” she asked leaning her body towards him slightly, her eyebrows raised while she maintained eye contact with him. His lips parted slightly as he looked away from her towards his lap.

“Do you have feelings for Jake?”

“No, why do you think that?” she shook her head while crossing her arms over her chest. He shrugged his shoulders while he rested his hands behind him and leaned his body back onto his hands. Her heart began to beat quickly as she watched him. The way his gaze lingered on her, the way his body looked. She forced herself to control her gaze.

“You guys are just hanging out a lot,” he said matter of factly. He let out a long sigh while he looked into her eyes.

“We are always home alone together, so of course we are going to hang out,”

“What do you mean? Sam and I are here like all of the time,” he protests. She didn’t know why he was set on the idea. “If you have feelings for Jake, just tell me,”

“I don’t have feelings for Jake!” she said a bit louder than she wanted. Her lips clasped together, “Everyone has someone in the house,” she started while avoiding his gaze, “Corey and Devyn, Sam and Katrina, You and Olivia, Jake and I were sort of forced to hang out together. Jake and I just needed someone to hang out with while everyone else was busy,” she explained. Colby nodded his head, “I mean now I won’t have anyone since he’s asking Tara out on a date,” she said.

Colby rolled his eyes, “You have me,” he whispered. She knew he meant it as a friend but the butterflies in her stomach started fluttering. Heat rushed to her cheeks as she thought about climbing on top of him and kissing his lips. It was something about the way he was looking at her, she wished she knew the way he was thinking. He lifted his hand and rubbed his chin while he leaned forward.

“You also have Olivia,” Y/N said, wishing she didn’t. He deflated slightly while he stood up from her bed, adjusting his shorts as he walked towards her. He pulled his lips between his teeth while he looked into her eyes.

“But you’ll always have me,” he whispered. She felt like she was being drawn to him like a magnet. Her mind was escalating as quickly as her body was. She was feeling a bit intoxicated the more she looked towards him, maybe now. Maybe now was the time. His phone vibrated consistently in his pocket, he shifted his gaze as he pulled his phone from his pocket. “Olivia, hey,” he spoke. He cleared his throat while he rolled his eyes at something she said. “Yeah, you can come over tomorrow.” His tone was annoyed.

She will never understand why he wanted to be with a girl like that. Sam mentioned Colby was not thinking with his head or heart when he decided to start dating her. Of course that was the reason, something she lacked. He put the phone back in his pocket while he lifted his gaze towards hers. “I’ve missed you, Colby,” her voice broke slightly while her eyes lowered to his lips. She was tired of hiding it. For a second it looked like he was leaning towards her, the tension in her stomach was filling. Her cheeks were flushed as she tapped her fingers on her desk beside her.

“Oh my god!” Jake shouted from outside of the room, he bursted through her bedroom door. Colby jolted out of his way, knocking into Y/N in the process. He muttered an apology as they looked towards Jake. “Tara said yes!” he said excitedly. Y/N walked towards Jake and gave him a hug and congratulated him while Colby stayed back. Looking towards Y/N, he wanted to kick Jake out of the room and kiss her but he couldn’t. He didn’t know how much longer he could pretend to like Olivia and not be completely in love with Y/N.

For a few long seconds his mind wandered and believed she felt the same way. The way she looked at him, she had to. He wanted to find out.

I know it'd be such a shame

[polnareffenjoyer]

random polnareff headcanons

polnareff my beloved (also some mild cursing ahead)

He's a big dumb bitch but he will go above and beyond to make you feel loved and special. The only thing that's bigger than his boobs is his heart. This man can go from 0 to 100 in seconds, from barely being able to stop himself from blushing like a madman in your presence to chivalrous and confident, throwing compliments your way. Giving you cute little personalized gifts whenever you're having a tough day or week. Your favourite flowers, favourite cake, a little thing you mentioned liking once. He remembers all of it. He's always happy to see your face light up whenever he brings you gifts. He's basically a puppy, awaiting your praise.

He'll literally worship you like a goddess. A random guy is harassing you? He'll be by your side in a heartbeat to put him in his place. Someone talks down on you? Oh honey, they got a big storm coming. He's never afraid to jump in your defense when there's a need to do so. You're extremely special to him and he had already lost enough loved ones in his life, can't risk getting you hurt. He might become invasive sometimes or paranoid, especially if you don't answer his texts for a long time. If you feel he's being too pushy, just tell him and he'll respect your boundaries, or at least try to.

He'd never flirt with other women while being with you. He might be known for his flirtatious nature, but if Polnareff finally found someone he truly loved, you BET he would never look at another person again. He's literally blinded by your divine beauty. Congrats, you managed to completely bewitch him.

Will tell you amazing stories from his past. All of the adventures, his journeys with the crusaders (if you weren't there with him, of course). He might leave out the more violent parts, just to make sure you're not uncomfortable. Also you bet he'd NEVER talk about toilet accidents. This shit stays in the past.

Listening to soft music together, dancing in the warm sunlight. Little moments that make you melt, like watching old french movies together while cuddling on the sofa, his hand resting on your hip. He'll talk to you in French, whispering declarations of his undying love into your ear, calling you all kinds of pet names.

Speaking of pet names, this man LOVES them. Everything from mon coeur to mon cherie, he loves muttering them into your ear right after waking up in the morning, holding you close. He also loves it whenever you use them on him, use a French pet name on Polnareff and he's putty in your hands, even if you can't speak french. It makes him feel extra soft on the inside.

Helping him with trauma, caressing his cheeks softly while letting him talk about anything he needs to get off his chest. His late sister, the friends he had lost, his childhood. You're his shoulder to cry on and only person he can truly confide in, he couldn't be more grateful to have you in his life.

He's a great listener too, will let you rant for hours and cry your eyes out if you feel like you need to. Would never judge you, no matter what you did or what your past was like.

Will teach you some of his native tounge. No matter how hard you'd butcher it, he'll just laugh it off and tell that you're doing great. It's not that he's making fun of you, you're just so precious and cute to him he can't help but to smile while listening to your attempts at French. Deep down it makes his heart warm and fuzzy just thinking about how hard you're working for him, even trying to speak his language. Always happy to help you with pronunciation and with translating some words. If you happen to speak french already, he'd be very happy to chat with you and drop some sick punchlines that no one else can understand.

He LOVES amusement parks. Take him to one and he'll act like a kid. Not that he doesn't act like a kid all the time, but while there he just gets extra excited. Will buy you cotton candy and take you on all the biggest rides while there.

Cooking. This man loves to cook, he'll prepare some of his favourite dishes just for you. Also appreciates when you cook for him, he'll eat anything you prepare, even if it's a flop. It's burned? It's not, just extra crispy. Don't worry about it.

This man is all about PDA, he wants to show you off. He won't go to far if you're not comfortable with it, but little things like hand holding or resting his arm around your waist is a MUST!

Might make more of these, I just had to get it out my system. A little warmup y'know.

[impossiblelibrary]

Today's rant brought to you by: Queer Eye Japan, can we all just try to be as kind as they try to be?

After watching the Queer Eye Japan super short season, I wanted to google to see the overall reaction to the show, make sure that my western eyes were correct in seeing the care that was given to the culture. Were cultural taboos, other than being outwardly gay, crossed? So I find this article in the top results and other than the perspective, why tho? Tokyoesque.com had an article with a higher reading level, with surface level appreciation but at least better written.

I can't get over this hate article though. Unfounded, dumb, wrong and incorrect. Do not go forward unless you like that blistering kind of anger from me.

But the reasons just get weaker as the article extends: "Hurts the country it set out to save?" Looking for white savior much? They did not go to save Japan, they gave some free shit to like 4-5 people, think smaller.

Their culture guide wasn't gay enough.

You want to suggest any lgbt insta models or celebrities, use your platform to raises some up?

"There is a growing sexless culture in Japan for married and unmarried people, and it is perilous watching Queer Eye present this without any context behind what is driving this behavior."

Sexiness is what the fab 5 embrace, unfortunately and it was probably discussed behind the scenes of how much talking about sex was allowed or polite and the conversation of not having sex is closer to the tip of the tongue rather than the feeling of sexiness. The West is not the ones blasting that information. It is across multiple Japanese printed newspapers and online stories by now and the "context" is still being discussed and debated amongst Japanese. So I don't think any outsiders should be weighing in or "explaining" this phenomenon. We can repeat what we have been told but guessing at the reasons is not our place. The reasons illustrated by the author of the article seem lacking, a take but not the only one, but who am I to speak on that being in a sexual relationship with someone who pulls from that culture?

Kiko begins to lecture Yoko-san on how she “threw away her womanhood” (referring to a Japanese idiom, onna wo suteru) by going makeup-free and wearing drab, shapeless clothes.

The mistranslation by the subtitles fixed by this author was necessary information. But Kiko didn't lecture her on it, it was brought up by Yoko before any of them arrived, that was her theme, that was what she had decided to focus on. Meanwhile, if you watched Jonathan, he understood there was no time to spend on makeup and skincare so provided her a one instrument, 3 points of color on the skin to feel prettier. That and the entire episode being the 5 treating her like a woman on a date, not trying to hook her up, which is what they did in American eps.

"In teaching a Japanese woman, who already struggles to find time for herself, how to make an English recipe, Antoni is making great TV and nothing more."

So Antoni shouldn't have taught her apple pie because it's too exotic for a Japanese woman. (Can you smell the sexism?)

He didn't make an apple pie, altho Yoko did mention her mother made that for her when she was a kid. He made an apple tartine after going to a Japanese bakery who makes that all the time. Then highlighted the apples came from Fuji in true Japanese media fashion. Honey, American television doesn't usually highlight where the ingredients come from. A Japanese producer told him to do that. So all worries handled within the same ep. She got Japanese ingredients, had the recipe shown to her and then made it for her friends in her own house. Did the author actually watch this show or nah?

"beaten over the head with his western self-help logic. “You have to live for yourself,” he says."

The style of build up the 5 went for was confrontational but in a "I'm fighting for you" way. It's hard to describe, but the best I can say is, a person has multiple voices in their head, from parents, siblings, society, and maybe themselves. By being loud and obnoxious, American staples right there, they are adding one more voice. You deserve this, you are amazing, you are worth it. I know this is against most Japanese cultural modesty, but maybe it shouldn't be.

Sarcasm lies ahead:

Apparently: mispronunciation is microaggressions, not just someone who had a sucky school system. Yea okay, They're laughing at the language not at how stumbling these monolinguals are with visiting another country. Mmhm. Japanese don't say I love you and don't touch and that should stay that way instead of maybe, once in awhile, feeling like they can hug. Yeah, let's just ignore Yoko's break down that she had never hugged her lifelong friend after hugging strangers multiple times. Maid cafes are never sexualized in Japan ever, just don't go down that one street in Akihabara where the men are led off by the hand sheepishly blushing. Gag me. And Japanese men love to cry in front of their wives and would never break down once the wife leaves. I have never seen a Japanese movie showcase that move. Grr.

"I identify as many cultures."

So you're a Japanese man when it's convenient for you to get an article published? Are you nationally Japanese or just ethnically or culturally?

Homeland is an inherently racist word?

"After the Bush administration created the Department of Homeland Security after the 9/11 terrorist attacks, a Republican consultant and speechwriter Peggy Noonan urged, “the name Homeland Security grates on a lot of people, understandably. Homeland isn’t really an American word, it’s not something we used to say or say now.”

Yes, let's use a Washington Post article rather than a etymology professor. Yes, the google search results increased after 2001 Homeland Security was used but the word has been around since the 1660s and I've read multiple turn of the century lit on white people returning to their homeland, i.e. the town off the coast they were born in.

"But" is not disagreeing. I think the repeated offender for the author is the not acknowledging the makeover-ees feelings. But, that is how LGBT have decided to deal with the inner voices that invade from society. They are just that, not our own, they are the influence of society, and we can choose, we have to choose, to be influenced by someone, anyone else.

Karamo can't speak about being black when an Asian is speaking about being Asian, even though the Asian gay man was feeling alone. It's called relating bitches, and I'm done with people saying that is redirecting the conversation, it's extending the conversation. That's how we talk, the spotlight is shared, especially when someone's about to cry and doesn't want to be seen as crying, time to turn the spotlight.

The gay monk wasn't good enough, you should have invited the gay politician.

Yeah, causes I'm sure a politician has all the time in the world for a quick stint and cry. They picked a Japanese monk who travels to NY because they had a guest who travels to the West too. Did you want him to stop traveling back and forth? Did you want a pure, ethnic and cultural Japanese gay man who has no ties to the west to talk to this Western educated young man? Seriously?

This is just not how it works in Japan.

Being in a multi-cultural marriage between two rebels, discussions on facets of culture are plenty in my household. Culture should be respected enough to be considered but not held on a pedestal like we should never adjust or throw some things out. LGBT being quiet and private for instance. "Being seen" was Jonathan's advice, and a good one especially for a Japanese gay man that was called feminine since he was a kid. Some gay men can hide, but as Jonathan said, he couldn't hide what he was, he couldn't hide this. So fuck it. Don't hide. It's actually more dangerous for a feminine man to come off as anxious rather than gay and proud. It makes you more of a target if they think you won't fight back. Proud means, Imma throw hands too, bitch.

This is also from the civil rights playbook going back to Black America: never hold a protest or a fight without the cameras, without being seen. LGBT have found the more seen they are, in media, in the streets, the better off we are. When LGBT Americans were being "private" about our lifestyles, we died, a la 1980s. They won't care if you start dying off if they never saw you to begin with.

And hence why I think the author's real anger is from these 5 being seen dancing flamboyantly in Shibuya, in Harajuku, afforded the privilege of doing this safely because of their tourist status, cameras and very low violence rate in Tokyo, loud and obnoxiously. Honestly, they wouldn't have been invited or nominated if they didn't want that brash American-ness coming into their home, just for a taste, at least.

Here's my real anger, my own jealousy: Japan's queer community currently does not have marriage or adoption rights. US does, so we have progressed further. But we are also not that many years from being tied to cow fences with barbed wire, beaten with baseball bats and left for dead overnight. If things are so bad over there, maybe take a few pages from the civil right playbook we took so much time to perfect and produced by the Black Americans who fought first. But so far, I only hear loss of jobs and marriages, which we still have here too. Stop trying to divide us, we are one community, LGBT around the world and we are here to try to help. Take it or leave it, it's not like we're going to go organize your own Pride parade for you.

Rant over? I guess. Is this important enough to be put in the google results along with his. Hell no, anyone with half a mind can see he's reaching more than half the time. And any argument about: this wasn't covered! There are a shit ton of conversations that are not covered in the 45 min they have. They are not a civil rights show, it's a makeover show, doing their best in that direction anyway. Know what it is.

Next blog post, what research I would guess was happening behind the scenes for each of the 5? I'm pretty sure I saw Jonathan doing Japanese style makeup there...

[reannabeth]

So I am rewatching the Percy Jackson Peter Johnson movie, and I just thought I’d make an official post for all my icks with it.

Why? Cause I like to rant? Idk.

First off, characters:

The age thing threw me off. They’re sixteen? Seriously? Why did they think that was a good idea? Did they want it to be a full-out series or not?

Leaves less room for character growth, both physically and mentally- and romantically (which I will get to in a bit).

Plus, the way the characters are written in the books is meant to fit twelve year olds, so everything they do feels off. Pessimistic 12 year old Percy was so funny. Like his sass would genuinely catch me off guard, because he’s so freaking young and you don’t really expect him to be so fearless and rash. Movie Percy does have sass and the awkward pessimist thing down pretty much to a ‘t’, but the way the right it can come off a bit corny, despite Logan Lerman’s best acting. Boy does the guy do a great job. His performance almost overshadows the bad writing, but not quite. Gods, the Capture-the-Flag tripping all falling over himself thing was fabulous, though the rest of the scene didn’t quite match up (do they even know how that game works??) Also,,, later corniness. Again. I don’t really care about the eyes thing, because blue is still the color of the ocean.

Annabeth is way too aggressive. Why is she so eager to slice-and-dice him even though they’ve never officially met? I guess she took the place of Clarisse in that way, but WHY. Clarisse had reason; Percy humiliated her and her cabin. If they wanted to get him to heal in the water and such, that could’ve been achieved if they had just followed the freaking books. They just… butchered her character in so many ways. Her appearance, the handy dandy Yankees ball cap, all that. The whole purpose of her being blonde was to discount the stupid dumb blonde stereotype and feed into her need to prove herself to everyone. That was taken away too.

Speaking of which… Grover. Baby boi, they ruined you. I didn’t mind them making him black… until they made him all party-like and confident. That may have not had to do with his race, though, and just trying to make him act more like the satyrs from the myths. But that defeats the point that Rick made; he purposefully made Grover scared and stressed and doing his best all the time as a foil to that stereotype- which is made obvious when the Party Ponies come into play in the second book. I miss that Grover. Also, why was he just like standing around during the disaster of the Minotaur scene (Gods, they made that so lame). It would’ve been better if he was unconscious, because then he wasn’t just standing around. I could’ve excused it as him just being reluctant because he’s scared, but this Grover is brave and more protective, a better fighter. Why would he just stand and watch? There are just so many things that don’t add up.

Chiron and Luke were really the only characters that felt true to their book forms.

The stand-off between Luke and Percy was cool, but the plot twist in the book is just so much better. I was totally blown away by the easy-going camp counselor dude poisoning a twelve year old kid with scorpion venom. Also, Luke got his scar from Percy? NOOO. It was never about Percy. It was about Luke and his dad. Percy was just a means to an end or an enemy to get rid of.

Gods, they forgot the prophecy, too. And Ares. And Clarisse. And Mr. D.

I don’t even want to talk about Hades. Or Persephone, for that matter. Why was she there? It wasn’t winter and- nope, not even. Just nope.

Riptide is a ballpoint pen, not a clicky one (though this one is admittedly cooler. WE NEED THE TARTARUS SCENE WHERE HE ANNABETH FIGURES OUT HE CAN WRITE WITH IT). And the shield thingy… that’s Tyson’s. He made it in the second one.

The thing is, Rick ties everything into his later works, so many of the changes they made mess with future possibilities and therefore narrow the rest of everything.

I understand not having every scene, every detail included in the movies. But why keep things if you’re going to change them?

Why have the hydra come in this movie? It comes in the second book, bro.

WHERE ARE THE ORANGE CAMP HALF-BLOOD SHIRTS??

Oh, right I was supposed to have topics. Sorry, everything is blending in together.

uh… ROMANCE.

Why was Grover a ladies man :|

What the Tartarus were they doing with Percabeth? Long, kinda creepy stares and close contact. THIS STUPID LINE: “I definitely have strong feelings for you. I just haven’t decide if they’re positive or negative yet.”

Like,,, EW. Is this supposed to be the “You drool in your sleep” replacement? How about no.

They took away the cute little crushes and slow-burn friends to lovers (even though it kinda started off as enemies).

MOMMA’S BOY

every moment Percy had with his mom was so awful. Why is he using “mother” so much? That’s only for his dad, because they haven’t reached the kind of relationship where Percy can call him Dad. I wanted to see the scene with her coming home from the candy shop with a big bag of candy and him pretending to be cranky when she shows affection but you can tell he loves it and ughhhhh

WHY

What did I like? The music. The Lotus flowers and casino scene. The pearl plot line thing was admittedly smart, but overall problematic and questionable. Why the Parthenon? Why not Crusty’s?

I do also like Percy and Grover’s bud relationship, but Annabeth was supposed to be his guide of a sort. So they either could’ve had them both guide him, or her alone. We needed more time to get to know her.

Where was Cerberus? I guess they didn’t want a repeat of Fluffy in The Sorceror’s Stone (since this is the same director), but still. He’s a major part of the Underworld system. And I wanted fancy Italian suit Charon and the “died in a bathtub” scene. The Hellhounds were also creepy, so how does the whole Mrs. O’Leary thing work? Also, makes me wonder why they didn’t have Percy be attacked by one during Capture-the-Flag like in the books.

ALSO WHY DID GROVER STAY? WHY? The Sally I know would never let him do that. Also, Sally can’t even get through the boundaries and into Olympus anyway, so why…? Why.

Persephone being all weird and flirty to Grover was just… ew. Again. Ew ew ew ew.

Hades is not the bad guy, he just came across a situation he could take advantage of. It doesn’t make sense that Luke would get it to Hades and Hades alone. It gets rid of the whole Kronos thing.

And the prophecies were gone, too. I know they brought them up in the second one, but not very well. The second one retconned the first’s continuity and yet still sucked on representing the second one. Yeesh.

Anyway, that’s my spill. I could organize it better, but I’m too tired at this point.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales: Terror of the Terra-Firmians!  (Lena Retrospective) (Commission by WeirdKev27): Launchpad Looses his Last Brain Cell and I Loose My Patience

Welcome back Weblena Warriors to the second part of my look at everyone’s favorite Emo Teen Shadow Lesbian Duck... and probably the only one but hey, semantics, Shadow Into Light, which was made possible by viewers like you, the ultra humanite and a commission from WeirdKev27. Picking up where we left off, we have our first episode that has a different intended order than airing order. 

As most of you probably remember, but some of you who joined later might not be aware of the broadcast order for the first half of season one is, in the academic sense, pretty fucked. It’s not Darkwing Duck’s entirely fucked by a web of badger spiders and a queen snake on top to make it some sort of train situation, but by just sorta airing whatever episodes they wanted to, Disney messed with the character balance so Huey got less focus, not that he got a ton of focus this season but still, as well as leaning into the episodes focusing more on the kids with less involvement from the adults which gave the wrong impression about the series. While it IS very focused on the triplets and webby, the show isn’t entirely about them, but as Frank has mentioned a few times, Disney Channel apparently has this WEIRD thing where they assume kids won’t like stories starring the adult characters. 

Yeah I’ve been wanting to talk about this for a while. Mostly how it’s so dumb I could swear Pauly Shore was an exec at Disney Channel. And he might be I don’t know what he’s doing these days and i’d like to keep it that way. For starters, the Scooge comics, while barely published in the US these days, are still popular globally and have appealed to kids and adults for generations and are mostly focused on him, with the kids in a supporting role and Ducktales, you know the thing your directly remaking here, was also mostly about him with the triplets supporting, if a bit less than the comics. Most of the Disney Afternoon was about adult characters, with any kids in side roles in the main cast. And it comes off entirely hypocritical of them to say this when the MCU is easily marvel’s biggest cash cow at the moment, and marvel properties have appealed to both kids and adults, like the duck comics, for decades. And if it’s because the marvel cartoons weren’t doing well , I’ll let you in on a little secret: Those didn’t do well because they looked bland and from what I’ve seen of them felt kind of bland, though I haven’t seen enough to fully judge. Kids LIKE adult characters as much as kid characters, and also like teen characters despite not being teens. Focusing on either is valid and while I LIKED Disney’s youth starring shows I also want another X-Men cartoon before I turn 50, and I bet kids would like that too, with the last one only failing because you bailed on it because you were throwing a hissy fit over fox having the movie rights, and do not get me started on that. Point is this argument is horse shit and should stay in the stables. 

So yeah I do think this episode came too soon and it’s placement effected it at the time and as such it dosen’t have the best rep with the fandom aside from the Lena bits and that includes me. The fact it was very early in the series and the characterizations hadn’t yet sunk in really hurt this episode in places but is it really that bad? Join me under the cut to find out

We open at the movies! Which scrooge apparently hasn’t been too since the 1930′s or seen any on video despite Della existing and being really stubborn. 

A rant for another episode. But the kids just got out of a Mole Monster movie, along with Lena, Beakly and Launchpad. Their reactions are as follows: Lena, Webby and Dewey really enjoyed it, Huey found it unrealistic... says the boy whose uncle fought a dragon made of gold a month or two back but we’ll get to that, and Louie was bored and felt it didn’t have enough of the ultra violence, kids these days it’s not about the gore it’s about the tension. And Beakly.. is just pissed Lena tricked them into seeing this and said it was educational. And the more I think about it the more this sounds like BEAKLYS fault than Lena’s. BEAKLY is the one who likely bought the tickets, who saw it was likely an r or pg-13 and who as we’ve seen HAS A PHONE, and ulnike scrooge probably isn’t so stingy she wouldn’t spring for a smart phone, so she could’ve just googled it, or whatever bird related pun is in this version.. gandered it.. yeah let’s go with that, gandered it, and SEEEN it wasn’t appropriate or walked htem out of the theater and ate the cost if she was that bothered by it. Sitting through a Horror Movie you didn’t research, didn’t pull the kids out of and dind’t bother to even check the poster for or use basic common sense is YOUR fault. And this could’ve worked fine, had Lena talk the kids into begging for it or had launchpad take them and have Beakly find out after, having driven to pick them up as she didn’t trust launchpad to take them home. Instead it makes the former super spy look REALLY stupid and feels really out of character for a SPY to not to do research. And it wasn’t like they decided on this later, Bentina being a spy was part of the character’s backstory from day one and its made clear as early as episode 2 in both airing orders. This is just lazy writing to justify the episode and I expect better from this crew. 

But an argument errupts between Huey and Webby over the Terra-Firmians, a hidden race of rock people living in Duckburg’s discontinued sewer system, allegedlys. So Lena suggest simply going down which gets a disapproving look from Beakly, despite you know this being their bread and butter, and the fact that if she had a problem with Scrooge not being involved.. she could just call him. Exploring fabled rock people is something he’d be into. I mean there’s a low profit margin but it also costs him almost nothing to walk to the theater or have launchpad swing around and pick him up. Just gas which given how much he pays for jet fuel isn’t a big ask. But Beakly soon gets distracted by Launchpad whose convinced the film is real and is attacking the poster a grim sign of things to come as while Beakly annoyed me in this one on rewatch, especially after realizing the above... Launchpad annoyed me both times and for VERY good reason we’ll get into. This provides a distraction and allows the trio to escape. Cue titles. 

After the title sequence, our heroes head deeper underground, there’s too much panic in this town... I mean props to Donald for trying something new but he really needs to rethink his cologne choices. Sex Panther is just.. not a good smell on.. anyone. 

So our heroes journey through the depths of the subway system, and we find out part of why Huey’s so skeptical, as he finds anything that isn’t in the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook to not exist, though the cracks in this already show as he’s added anything that does. We’ll get back to this later but as you can tell the basic dynamic for 24 minutes is Webby being a wholehearted True Believer and Huey being a Skeptical Sally. And Lena is just sorta “Eh gives me an excuse for shenanigans” about it. We also get a peak into webby’s mind as we see her notes .. which really just come off as Terra-Firmian fanfiction involving a war of succession between two sides, the terra’s and the firmies, something based on previous media, and also some doodles of a fictional candy called webby-dings and herself as a superhero, both things I want to see. 

But yeah the first third of the episode is pretty simple, just them journeying, the occasional shift in the firmament, and it’s not bad, and there are a few great bits: Huey nerds out about rocks, and finds them way more interesting than a possible rock monster.

Which leads to the best gag of the episode as when Huey tries to pick up a big sample Webby, annoyed at his hyperfixation on the JWG, asks him to ask his book for help.. which he does by reading it and actually manages to pick the large rock up. This is halted though when Lena screams.. though she really just did it to draw them to an abandoned subway car full of glomgold posters for glomgold products because of course a failed subway project has his name plastered over it. You can’t spell glomgold without failure.. the failure is silent. Glomgold is not. 

The fun is interuptted though by a livid Beakly who had realized they were missing in an earlier scene, after telling the Manager that McDuck Industries would pay for the poster.. and then found out Launchpad also destroyed the toilets “They come up thorugh the sewers!”. Launchpad that’s CHUDS, Ninja Turtles and Rats who raised Ninja Turtles like their own sons, mole people dig or use old mineshafts. It’s basic mole science. Also Beakly really shouldn’t sweat it, I just assumed the city has had a runnig bill witht he company for “McDuck Family and Employee Related Accidents, Mayhem and Shenanigans”. I mean he’s had Gyro on his payroll for at least a decade and a half by the series start, Gyro has leveled whole sections of city in an afternoon more than most giant monsters. Of which several have destroyed Duckburg. It got better. 

Point is she’s livid about them sneaking off with Lena pointing out their some sort of adventure family and Beakly.. saying she won’t see them again, or at least implying it hard. I’ll put a pin in this, as the train buckles and a bit of seismic, or rock men, activity means their stuck. So they divide into teams: Beakly will go try and unhook the train car from the busted cars so they can ride out, Launchpad will go try and fix it, and we get this lovely exxchange as a result

Launchpad: Cool never crashed a train before Beakly: Can’t you try driving it without crashing it? Launchpad: Wha? 

His face in that scene is priceless. He takes Dewey along. More on that in a second. Webby, Huey and Louie are told to stay put with Beakly only bringing Lena along because she dosen’t trust her. So since we have three split plots for a second... let’s split up gang, starting with the most aggrivating, middling with what you all came here for and why this is part of the retrsopective, and ending with the plot that directly heads into the final part of the episode. 

Launchpad and Dewey: GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Okay starting with the most infamous plot and easily the worst part of this episode, probably the worst plot in any Ducktales 2017 episode. That’s not hyperbole it’s really that bad and really pissed people off, as fans of the original launchpad felt they made him overly stupid. This is where the airing order’s a problem as putting an episode with a subplot where one of your characters is obnoxiously dumb right up front means they assume this is his charcter and not just one poorly written chapter in a very dumb but very loveable characters life, likely because the writers hadn’t figured out how to properly scale his stupidity with comptience. 

So as a result we get a good 3-4 mintutes if not agonizingly more of Launchpad assuming something he saw in a fucking movie film was real. That.. that’s his actual plot. Need I remind you, he’s in his late 20′s early 30′s. He’s not much older than me. While other episodes have him as dim this one claims he CAN’T TELL FACT FROM FICTION. 

There are lines you have to keep with your characters to keep the audience from hating them. They crossed it about 80 times with this plot and make Launchpad into a gibbering dunderhead who can’t do anything right versus a regular dunderhead whose good at one or two things and loveable enough for us to like him and not care about his numerous safey violations and child endagerment charges. Thankfully this is the ONLY episode that gets this bad and they clearly learned from this, but it dosen’t make it any less of a tough sit. 

Dewey spends most of the subplot with a look on his face that just screams that he’s as done with this bullshit as we are, as Launchpad assumes he’s a mole person and brought along a pipe to presumibly bludgeon him, because wanting to cave his best friends skull in over stupidity is a GREAT look> Thankfuly he does not. And when the lights come back on Launchpad.. assumes he’s a monster because of bright light, GAH, and locks him out before they end up outside and the plto resolves itself by Dewey pointing out by Launchpad’s utterly baffling logic that he could be a mole monster, so Launchpad.. assumes he is. 

The subplot’s later buttoned up as he claims “I love being a mole monster”, again diffrent subteranian creature launchpad, she says he’s not and my suffering is thankfully at an end. This plot just sucks, it’s bad, overly stupid and dosen’t work with an adult character. Someone like say Ed from Ed, Edd N Eddy, or someone who belivies in weird conspiracy stuff like Dale Gribble or Stan Pines. with either of them this plot would’ve been fucking great. I could buy it from Dale and it just comes off as his normal paranoid weirdness. With Launchpad it comes off like he seriously needs help because the episode frames it as if he can’t tell ficton from reality, and his splotlight episode later would directly contridct this and make this episode even more aggrivating, as he’s a fan of Darkwing Duck, and KNOWS it’s acted out by an actor, so why wouldn’t he get this? It’s just....

It sucks, it sucks and I thankfully get to move on to a better subplot

Beakly and Lena: What You Are in the Dark

Beakly tells Lena she’ll never see Webby again after this.. then chastises her when she won’t help despite you know having just said she’s going to force their friendship apart, which Lena points out. She then gets mad at Lena making a sarcastic comment at her. Okay she’s lived with Louie for at least a week in airing order and a month or two in actual order. She has to be used to this by now. She’s insolent.. because you show her no respect, blame her for something that while sure she talked you into, you should’ve known better, and top it off by saying you want to keep her from the kids because they have bright futures and come from good familes and asks who rasied her and her face.. well.

Yeah wheras Launchpad and Huey, more on that in a second, were hurt by this being some of their earliest big roles, Bentina wasn’t.. until later when we found out just HOW bad Magica is to Lena and how much she dosen’t care about her other than as a tool to use. At this point we didn’t know just how much Lena was playing webby, how much she was only manipulating her, and even with her heroic act here we didn’t know if she only saw Webby as her way to break free. The next episode makes it clear she dosen’t and genuinely does care, 100%, so in hindsight it makes Bentina come off as ghoulsih for horribly asssuming about a girl she dosen’t know, and even if she did know about Magica wouldn’t know the full story, just like us, and then BERATING her after already saying she’s going to rip her away from Webby, which itself is PRETTY bad as she’s the only friend the girl has and sh’es doing so on... talking them into a horror movie, which as I outlined was more Bentina’s fault than Lena’s, and leading the kids into a dangerous place whicha gain, Lena pointed out is something she lets Scrooge do. And trust me i know that she actually knows Scrooge, and we later find out, as we’ll cover next month, that she isn’t ware HOW dangerous things are with Scrooge. It dosen’t change the fact she knows they do dangerous stuff to a point and that Lena may just be acting out. It also dosen’t change the fact she drove three children, yes including launchpad, down here with her instead of sending them home with Launchpad.. granted that option isn’t the safest but it’s safer than taking her with them thena cting like it’s ALL lena’s fault when three of the children, again including launchpad, are down there because of HER. Not Lena, HER. I’m harder on her because she’s older, wiser and was “raised properly” apparently. Though given the way she treats a random teen off the street she again knows nothing about and dind’t bother to ask... it begs the question. 

IT’s a good question. I could see the classism coming from being raised in 40′s and 50′s britain, judging by the timeline.. but even then she’s seen the world, and while her nature is supscious, the classit bullshit makes no sense after presumibly working with, and later spymastering for, various agents of various backgrounds. How has she not dropped this in decades. Scrooge very clearly dropped the racisim and homophobia of his time, so it still stands  on her for not dropping this. And Lena’s hurt shows under hte mask for the first time, that beneath the snark and secrecy.. is just an abused teenager with nowhere else to go and no way out being bullied by an older woman whose cutting off the only light at the end of the tunnel nto for good reason but out of classist, overprotective mallice.  My issues, which to be fair probably were intentional in the episode but sitll are a bit overblown, aside we do get an absoluttley tremendous moment later as a car falls on top of Beakly.. and Magica, speaking once more urges Lena to leave her, let her die and let their plans progress. And while that iself is.. dumb, what if someone finds her or her corpse later, especially since Scrooge would likely perosnally want to retrive the body to give her a proper burial as she’s his only friend at this point, or the rest of the family questoin the story?, it fits Magica’s lack of foresight we see throughout the season. But Lena... saves her. While she later gives an explination, and a valid one at that, it’s clear from her expressoin, her actoins and how she does it... that this is her. Part of it is defiance, as she glares at Magica before doing it, her own stubborn nature mixed with her hatred of her “aunt”, meaning Magica just made it all too easy for her to do this. But the real reason is clear: It’s the right thing to do. While pissing off her aunt and getting away with it is the cherry on top.. the real reason is that unlike Magica.. Lena is not a killer, not a monster, and not a heartless vacum ofa person. Even if she doesn’t like Beakly, for good reason.. she can’t, she WON’T leave her to die and leave Webby an orphan again. She loves Webby too much to do that to her and while she may deny it.. she’s too good a person to leave someone to die for something so petty. Even if she never sees webby again and the plans ruined. It’s better than the weight of knowing she let someone who wasn’t trying to harm her and whose actions, while terrible, were out of misguided protection of her granddaughter, die like this. She saves her. And as we’ll see it pays off.. but before that. 

Huey, Webby and Louie: Into the Unknown This plot’s a bit shorter, as Webby and Huey continue their argument, with Louie eventually making it clear, and not even hiding it when directly asked by Huey, that he’s playing both sides with a delighted expression on his face as the movie was boring but this, this is interesting. Which it is. But it’s interupted by dings on the roof and while Huey assumes i’ts just a regular rock, it moves while their not lookiung.. and soon red eyed, horrifying beasts look out at them and the kids flee back to the car. This dosen’t pan out as the car starts to shake and is clearly going to collapse.. and while Webby and Louie are prepared to flee, rock monsters or no, Huey, in an utterly heart shattering image.. stays in place, terrified of moving. 

This is where this plot goes from mildly aggrivating, as Huey’s Skeptic shenanigans can get on the nerves.. to BRILLIANT. See at the time this was more annoying because it was assumed the skepticsim would be a part of Huey’s character and we’d get more episodes of him being annoying only to be proven wrong, as he semeingly dosen’t learn his lesson at this point, looging the terrafrimians in the guide book. But on rewatch.. this plot is amazing.  For starters the plot subtly introduced the defening characteristic of Huey’s personality, one that’s become more prounounced in Season 3: His need for Order. He needs things to make sense: He solves stuff because he likes there to be order in the world and something he can understand, he can put in a box in his head. Like a lot of neurotypical people, myself included, he struggles horribly when the clearly defined boxes of his life and things he undestand have wrinkles or complexities he can’t get. I for instnace easily got it when I was introduced to the concept of trans people or being non binary.. they just make sense in hindsight: given how our brains are messya nd complicated it makes sense some people would be born in the wrong ones, and tht with all the science and medicine we have to correct that, should be allowed to transition if they so choose. It makes equal sense that some people just don’t have a gender or are gender fluid, being both or neither. Despite struggling with non binary prounouns due to force of habit.. I get the concept with no real difficulty. But when it comes to accepting I don’t have to apologize for everything and that everyone is not angry or that anger is natural and people sometimes get mad and you can’t and shouldnt’ fix it.. it’s something I STRUGGLE with even knowing it’s not right, because my brain is just wired that way. 

That’s how Huey’s struggle comes off here.. he reveals he’s willing to stay and die.. because he’s SO scared of the unknown, that the idea of dying from something he at least knows what it is versus something he dosen’t.., so paralizyed by his own brain he can’t figure out the obvious.. it takes Webby reaching out to him figuratively and literally, to show him that sometimes you have to face the unknown. The unknown is fucking terrifying.. but it can be good and it’s better than sitting there, scared and unable to move. You have to try, to grow and take that risk that things may not go well to really LIVE. 

So he does.. and they reunite with the rest of the group.. and soon find the terrafirmains.. who as it turns out once we get some light on them... are actually just goofy looking,  brightly colored, each one matching one of the kids, kids themselves, and Huey reaches out and touches one, which by ET logic means their friends now, and the terrafirmians help them get out. And this lesson sticks. While sure Huey catalogues it and it seems it didn’t.. he’s never this skeptical again. This douchey skepticsim was only for one episode, his fear of the uknown replcaed with boundless curosity and from here on he’s CURIOUS about new stuff as long as it’s not trying to kill him. He loves taking in new experinces, maybe not to webby levels but he does actually try them and study them instead of just fearing them. 

Before we wrap things up, obviously we need to talk about the JWG not having entries on a lot of stuff. This would be corrected next season as it returns to being a big book of everything, but dosen’t completely contridct this as Timephoon! shows there’s stillcgaps.. which i’m fine with. While it knowing EVERYTHING was fine for the original series here, with things being slightly more groudned, it’d just be an obvious plothole if Huey didn’t use it every single time they ran into something and that’d get boring. Instead it’s simply that it dosen’t know everything, and really in the comics at times it didn’t and the triplets found out new things. It knew almost everything mind you, but having some gaps for dramatic tnesion is fine with me and Seasons 2 and 3 decided on that instead of just having it being a scouting manual which wa sfor the best. And even by later in the season hit has guides to getting a small buisness loan, so they already course corrected. 

So everything’s wrapped up and while Magica berates Lena for disobeying her.. Beakly interputps, thankfully not seeing magica and admits she was wrong and invites Lena for pancakes, even taking a crack about if their actually pancakes or english muffins with syrup, which sounds like my own living hell, in stride, having clearly grown. And Lena explains to Magica that this was the better approach: now she’s got the in theyw anted, and is above suspcison for now. Still not so much that an obvious act won’t be detected but enough that she dosen’t ahve to work actively around her anymore. Magica scoffs.. and while part of it is probably rage.. part of it is deep down both of them know she did it out of defiance.. and only Lena knows that she did it for the right reasons... she just dosen’t get why. She probably justifies it as playing the long game.. but deep down she knows something’s changing about her.. and she’s not sure if that’s a godo thing or not. 

Final Thoughts: This episode is as you can tell a mixed bag. It’s 2/3 of a good episode, with the Lena plot, my issues aside, being excellent and the Terra-Firmian plot likewise fun, even if Huey can get grating the payoff is worth it, and the jokes are really high quality. It’s just bogged down by that fucking launchpad plot that just crushed my soul in it’s palms every time it came back. I went on at length why i hated that one but boy oh boy was the hate of that subplot warranted and I stand by calling it the worst plot of the series. It is: it’s not funny, it makes no goddamn sense, and it drags down what’s otherwise a pretty solid epsiode.

Next Time on Lena: Jaws the shark, lurking in the dark, in the depths of the bin one day of a lark decides to get rowdy, get real violent takes a vacay out to Duckburg er.. Island.. also Scrooge faces his greatest Nemesis.. a PR Tour to clean up his image after an unfortunate giant Beanstalk Incident. Be there and be hip to be square. 

Next Time on This Blog: I Tackle a DCOM for the first time for another commissioned review as we take a look at racisim, specifically Apartheid and breaking indoctrination, with The Color of Friendship. See you next Rainbow. 

[calligraphist-artemisia]

A Long Day

For Kidgemas 2020. The prompt for December 29 is “Elf on the Shelf”.

Summary: Pidge returns home after another long day of working in retail. Luckily, Keith is there with a cup of hot chocolate and a warm hug.

❄ - ❄ - ❄ - ❄

Pidge groaned as she kicked off her shoes at the front door, letting them land however they pleased on a rug off to the side. All of her muscles ached after her extra long day and there was an uncomfortable pinching sensation in her shoulder, likely from spending over 8 hours lifting boxes on and off of shelves when she wasn't busy frantically running around to try and find items for customers.

“I'm home,” she weakly called out.

Keith stepped out into the main hall from the kitchen with a pair of festive blue-and-white mugs in his hands. “I made hot chocolate. It's Hunk's recipe.”

Pidge took another few seconds to hang up her keys and coat and then shuffled over to her husband and eagerly accepted the cup he held out to her. She took a sip and closed her eyes in bliss. “Mmm, so good.”

“If you like that, then you've love the fire I have going,” Keith said as he wrapped one arm around her shoulders and guided her into the living room, where a fire was crackling merrily in the hearth.

“I love you,” Pidge breathed.

“Are you talking to me or the fire?”

Pidge giggled as she turned to him and rose up on tiptoe to press a kiss to his cheek. “I'm talking to you, dummy. This is perfect. Thank you.”

“Well, I heard you had a rough day and figured you deserved a little pampering. Want to sit and you can tell me about it?” Keith asked.

Pidge let him steer her over to the couch. “Are you sure you want to hear my complaining? We could just sit and watch a movie or something instead.”

“You listen to me bitch about Griffin all the time. Besides, a reliable source tells me that a little venting after a stressful day is a good thing.”

“Does your reliable source have a name that starts with 'S' and ends in 'iro'?”

“Maybe.”

Pidge couldn't fight the grin that made its way across her face, nor did she really try and stop it. She happily sat down on the couch and cuddled against Keith once he settled down next to her. She took a few minutes to relax and enjoy the rich hot chocolate before it got too cold and then gave in to the need to complain about the dumb stuff she had to deal with at work.

“People are fucking idiots,” she said.

“Agreed,” Keith said, tapping his mug against hers – an action that elicited a chuckle from Pidge.

“Like, when one person who works at the store says 'sorry, we don't have that in stock', you don't go two aisles down and ask someone else if there are any in stock!” Pidge barely restrained herself from wildly gesturing her frustration, well aware of the hot drink in her hands. “So sorry that we don't have any more of your stupid elves when there's only a week until Christmas! Or any more of whatever popular toy that's been half off all week! Also, if you really want an elf on the shelf, then you'd better get there when we open at 7 and not at noon on a Saturday! Also, we don't have any of the new gaming systems and we're absolutely not hiding them in the back and if I get accused of that one more time I'm going to lose it.”

Keith gently took the mug of hot chocolate from her hands. “I didn't think Elf on the Shelf was still popular.”

“Oh, it is,” Pidge growled. “I don't think I'll ever understand it.”

“Well, if you ask Allura it's a timeless tradition that helps inspire the 'wonder of the season' in children,” Keith remarked.

Pidge rolled her eyes. “Oh, honestly. It's not timeless when it only started fifteen years ago! I think it just adds to the stress people feel this time of year. Like, not only do you have to worry about work and finding the 'perfect' presents and managing the household like normal, you want to add setting up elaborate scenes with a toy elf to the long list of shit that needs done?” She pulled her legs up onto the couch and curled them beneath her as she pressed a little more firmly against Keith, who handed back her hot chocolate.

She took a long sip and sighed in pleasure at the warmth that flowed through her. “Maybe I'm being too harsh...”

“Nothing wrong with venting about something that bugs you,” Keith said.

“Yeah, I know. And it's not like I'd ever say any of that to Allura's face, since I know it's something she enjoys doing for the kids. It's just... sometimes it feels like people try and go too over-the-top with Christmas, you know? It's supposed to be this holiday that brings joy to people, but all I see are people that are so stressed out that they're rude to everyone around them. Oh, did you know I ruined a child's Christmas because someone else I work with put out a toy that we're not allowed to sell until next month? A single toy. That isn't released until next month. That said child probably knows nothing about!”

It was only because of Keith's hand over hers that she didn't spill her drink.

“Whoever thought it was a good idea to send new items – especially toys – that can't go out when Christmas is happening is an idiot and deserves to be punched. Preferably in the face.”

Pidge huffed and focused on finishing her drink before it got too cold. Her anger slowly drained away as she stared at the flickering flames and by the time a few minutes had passed, she no longer felt the need to rant about work.

“Feeling better?” Keith asked softly.

Pidge nodded and finally relaxed against him. “Yeah. Thanks, Keith.”

“Anytime.”

[xkandy]

Psycho Pass - timeline and why you shouldn’t hate on S3 that much

I’ve been following Psycho Pass ever since the original run of Season 1 back in 2012. I’d like to make you and everyone who disliked S3 understand some things. Hope I structure this well, here goes.

Obviously there will be some spoilers.

First let’s take a look at the releases in the PP universe so far. We have:

Season 1

Season 2

Movie

Sinners of The System 1,2,3 (2 being a prequel)

Season 3

First Inspector

Before I write anything I’m going to stop you and say that nothing tops Season 1. So there,now that we have that out of the way let’s continue.

Season 1

Takes place in late 2112-2113

Central characters are Akane and Kogami and let’s face it, for many Kogami is the one who carried the show, even if some consider him to be a “generic edgy”  protagonist I think he’s pretty solid as a character at this point.

Akane has had MAJOR character development throughout the whole season and I’ll never forget how upset some people were that she was a noob. That was the whole point, she is a newbie and a model citizen who trusts the system, her character evolution revolves around coming to the realization that the system is flawed.

Makishima as a villain was phenomenal and not because quoting from books , but because his motives and reasoning were clearly established  and he made both protagonists question themselves and the system.

Season 1 is written by Gen Urobuchi , the following seasons (except the movie) are not written by him.

Season 2

Takes place in 2114.

A trainwreck, don’t even want to go here. The disappointment was huge.

I found Mika to be extremely annoying and unbearable with 0 character growth. The only highlights for this season for me were Gino and Akane.

Onwards.

The Movie

Takes place 3 years after the events of Season 1, in 2116.

Nothing of major impact happens but if you love the old cast , namely Gino, Akane, Kogami you’ll enjoy this and I have a feeling this is what they were betting on and wanted to see: the public reaction to the old cast.

The interaction between Akane and Kogami is the highlight (another one being Gino vs Kogami).

It’s clear as day that Akane evolved as a character and Kogami is questioning his past, so let’s say some minor character development.

Sinners of the System

If you enjoy the universe and aren’t too attached to the main cast you will like these, although case 3 is about Kogami so I’m sure it’s the one most people will like.

Case 1 has some minor Mika character development (she still sucks imho)

Case 2 is a prequel that sets up some details about the storyline that will be the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

Case 3 is the one you’ll want to watch if you want to see S3/First Inspector as it revolves around Kogami and him coming to terms with his thoughts when he is asked by a young girl to train her as he sees in her a version of himself and where this will lead (girl seeks revenge) . 

His story arc regarding Sasayama’s death, revenge, Makishima is complete, it ends here as he decides to head back to Japan.

This triggers the potential for the future series/movies in the Psycho Pass universe to deal with the (possible) unresolved storyline of dealing with Akane once he gets back to Japan, because he will have to face her at one point.

So after Case 3 Kogami is already a complete character , there is no strong conflict or drive for him as the one which had driven the plot of season 1.

We already know everything about him.

Let me jump back to Gino for a brief moment, his first arc concluded when his father died and he became an enforcer, his current arc might be related to what I’ll get to in a second.

Season 3

Alright so here we are,a new season nobody was expecting and 2 new protagonists we expected even less.

Taking place in 2120 , 8 years after the events of Season 1 it follows Arata and Kei in their own CID adventures.

The tone of the series is vastly different from both S1 and S2, most notably :

it feels like those friendly buddy cop TV shows

the violence is greatly reduced, no more “shock value”

the side characters aren’t invested into, they’re just there for being there and plot devices (they’re alright, the new enforcers get some characterization but it’s not season 1 level)

Arata’s “skill” - if you think about it as high level empathy it’s gonna feel less dumb

Being new protagonists, the writers had to make sure we get to like them by offering us details about their past and what drives their motives, I’d say they did an ok job at that.

There’s no room for comparison to Akane and Kogami, those 2 are already established characters who have resolved story arcs and suffered changes.

Keep in mind Akane is 28 now and Kogami is 36, whereas the new protagonists are in their early 20s. They have time for character evolution, it’s easier to write new characters into the universe than deal with established ones such as Akane and Kogami.

Also, we see Kou visiting Akane while she’s in jail, her not being surprised means this may have happened before, which leads to further questions in the storylines that will definitely be explored in the new PP installments to follow:

Details on the incident which caused her to be in jail

What happened when Kogami returned to Japan and how the Sibyl system dealt with this

Kou reuniting with Ginoza, since both work for the hot blonde now

etc, you get the idea

First Inspector

It’s actually not that bad, I’m not going to spoil anything (well...not everything) but I suggest giving it a chance. If you don’t want to watch S3 just read about it and watch this, the most important things to take are from episode 3′s last scenes

Akane is released AS AN ENFORCER by Sibyl and will help Mika

Kogami is sent to get her, there will definitely be a recap between these two

Arata and Kei both have secrets regarding the case they worked on, not gonna spoil anything

Yayoi is alive, and will live with Shion. Just puttin this out there since they’re everyone’s favorite lesbians

Mika is still shit.

Gino is still based as fuck 

Also, there is a post credits scene with Akane saying something along the lines of “ let’s talk about the incident that got me jailed “ . This was only in the theatrical release so you can bet your ass we’re getting more PP in the future.

Thoughts

Lastly, what everyone needs to understand is that S1 made PsychoPass become a franchise. A franchise revolves around different characters in the same universe, sometimes the focus is on the OGs , but sometimes it isn’t.

I would like to note here that Gen Urobuchi is responsible for Season 1 (you know, the dude who wrote Madoka and other stuff like that...) and he did a great job writing a compelling story. Did he want PP to turn into a franchise? This I do not know and I have a feeling this might explain his absence from the later installments of the series. 

He wrote a complete story in 22 episodes which could have been left at that but seeing how well received the first season was it spawned a franchise.

What I want to say is please give Arata and Kei a chance (S3 protags) . They’re not that bad and they help the franchise stay alive as it seems they were pretty well received in Japan. Would you rather Mika be the main character again?! HELL NO

Now I love the main trio - Akane,Kou,Gino - as much as everyone but at this point they’re so high level it’d be hard to write a series just about them. Make one wrong move and the fanbase will hate you.

Also, this one is for all you Kogami x Akane shippers, I view their relationship as professional only but I’ll be damned if I didn’t scream at those 2 short scenes these 2 had in S3 and FI .Can’t wait to see the interactions between grown up Akane and seasoned peace-of-mind Kogami.

If you’re still here thanks for reading my rant, hope I made sense. 

edited to add some stuff

[domesticblisss]

Näher | Pt.04

Walter x Female Reader (Nicknamed ‘Hase’) Mob AU! Rating: Mature (Minors DNI) Word Count: 1765 Warnings: Angst, fluff. Death mention, brief sex mention, jealousy, parental abuse mention. I guess that’s all? Tell me if you see something else. Summary: Walter wants to know what Hase thinks of him. Pt.01 | Pt.02 | Pt.03

After the incident with Axel, Walter has been less aggressive with everyone. He apologised to us and stayed away of our ways for a while. That following week, I only saw him at the office or at the club, when we were home, we had our meals at different times, if I was at the pool, he kept himself at the library or at his home office, he didn’t even seek me out at night, that week was the first time I properly used the bedroom he had designated for me when I first moved in.

Of course I didn’t let go so easily. That same week, on a friday, after we got home from the club, followed him to his bedroom and cornered him there, forcing him to talk to me. “What’s going on?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Hase.” “Walter, don’t play coy with me. You know what I’m talking about. You have been weird since the day Axel and I fucked.” I spoke a little too harsh with him. He sighed, rubbing his hands on his face. “I’m an idiot and I should leave you alone. You’re better off without me. You deserve to be with Axel, not an arschloch like me.” the defeated tone on his voice is just sad, I had never seen him like that. “Walter, right after Axel left the room, what did I say to you?” “That you would kill me if anything happened do Junior.” he answered in a monotone voice. “That’s not what I’m talking about, you know what I’m talking about.” I pressed on. He sighed before answering “You said we should talk, because that’s how things get solved. And that you loved me.” I smiled at him after hearing it. “Yes, yes I did. So, stop making decisions for me and talk to me when something is bothering you, okay? Now get in bed.” “Why?” “Get in bed.”

I gave him the blow job of his life.

Right now it’s 06am of a friday and the alarm is going off for another workday. This week was completely stressful, one of our fighting rings got busted and Walter has been on edge trying to restore it. I got up to turn off the alarm and get ready for the day. As soon as I sat to get up, I felt Walter’s long arms snake around me and a light kiss being pressed on the middle of my back. “Where do you think you are going?” he mumbled on the same spot where he kissed me. “It’s friday, liebling. We have to go to work.” “No, we don’t. We are getting the day off, we deserve it and everything is already taken care of. Now please, get back to bed.” So, I did, he held me close his chest, his breathing lulling me to sleep almost immediately.

I woke up to Walter nudging me a few hours later. “Schatz, wake up. C’mon.” “What time is it?” “It’s 09:02. Please sit up.” I sat on the bed and saw he had a tray filled with food. “Wait, am I getting breakfast in bed?” “Yes, breakfast in bed for meine königin.” He kissed my lips and continued “Don’t how good it all will be though. I did it all myself, so fire the chef if it’s horrible.” “I’m sure it’s all delicious.” And they were. Pancakes were fluffy, bacon crispy, the eggs just how I liked, and he even put a little cinnamon on the coffee.

We ate in silence for a while, his right hand running up and down my leg. After we finished, I asked him what he wanted to do for the day, and he said that he would love to spend the day in bed. And we did. I got a random Spotify playlist on playing soft music on the bluetooth system just as ambiance music, we climbed under the covers and just stayed there, enjoying each other’s presence.

 After a few minutes, Walter let out a question.

“What do you think of me?” I didn’t really get what he meant with it, getting up, I sat in front of him to look at him better. “What do you mean with what I think of you? You know I love you.” “Not like that. Me as a person. What you think of me as a person?” I looked at him almost panicking. “Walter... I–I just...” “It’s okay, liebe, be honest. Don’t be afraid. I really want to know.” “Look,” I sighed before continuing, “I’m not going to lie to you, I was so fucking scared when I first met you. That day on watch room at the club, I was terrified of you. My fight or flight response was on the whole time.” I let out a giggle “but somehow I was mesmerised by you. You’ve got this energy around you that sucked me in. For some reason I knew your pipe game was going to be good.” “Pipe game?” “Yeah, you know how to use your dick.” “Oh...” “Yeah, so where was I? Oh, yeah! So, you just don’t let people in. At least me, I know the guys know more about you than I do, well, of course they do, they’ve known you way longer, but anyway. What I’m trying to say is that you don’t let me in, and then something happens and you completely shut down, ignores everyone one or go on completely full rude mode. If something goes wrong or if you want to prove a point, you either make people uncomfortable, make them do something that will not sit right with them. For example, the thing with Axel and I. Yeah we’ve always had a tension going on that someday we would have had it figured out. But you thought your way was going to solve it all.” “You know you could’ve said no, right? I don’t want you do anything you don’t want to, any of you.”

“Oh, I know. I fucked Junior because I wanted and he wanted it too, he was just shocked that you came to it out of nowhere. But again, you can’t just make people do shit because you think it would be better for them, or because they did something wrong and you must prove a point to them. Talk to people. I know it’s hard for you, but sometimes just a few words go a long way.” He kept staring at me with those piercing steel eyes for a while after I finished my rant. His hand lifted up to my head, tangling his fingers on my hair, caressing my features. He sighed.

“You know, this business was my dad’s. I got it from him after he died. We had a rocky relationship and at first, I didn’t want to take over it. I hated him for most of my life. When my brother and I were kids, teenagers, if we did something wrong, he would beat the shit out us. I’ve lost count of how many scars I have because of him. I just carried this with me in all aspects of my life. I didn’t really have friends in school, people only got close to me because I would make favours for them, because I would buy them things and my life moved like this. They liked when I was angry, aggressive. They thrived on my bossing around, commanding and humiliating the people they didn’t like. To me that felt nice, felt right because I got the positive attention I never got at home. I was alone again when I refused to do something they asked me to or college got around and everyone went their separate ways. Not one call or text from them. Then I met the guys, they didn’t care about my money, didn’t care about who my family was and what we are capable of, they just accepted me for my own person. So, when my father died, after a lot of self-debate on whether or not I should accept my destiny, I asked them to join me, and here we are.” he stopped for a bit to breathe in some air and I had to look away from him to stop the tears I had been holding back from falling.

“Then you came in.” He started again. “At first I thought you were some invention from Axel’s mind because of how he talked about you. He never showed us a picture of you. That the day I saw you reading and drinking tea on your balcony, I finally understood him. I know the way I pursued wasn’t the best one, but I really don’t know better. You don’t take shit from anyone, you’re not afraid of getting on my face, that just draws me closer to you. I stand by what I’ve said to you before, if you want to get with any of the guys, you can. If I tell to do something you don’t want to, you’re more than free to deny it. If you get tired of all of this, if you don’t want to even see my face anymore, you can leave, and I’ll never go after you. I know I’m a prick, I know I’m a bastard and that I don’t deserve good things. I hate being this way.” Tears were rolling down my face by now, all I could do was hug him, hold him close to me as he did the same. We stayed like that for a little bit, me only getting up again so I could tell him what I was thinking.

“Look, you’re none of these horrible things you just said. All I see in you is a great guy that is worried about his friends, you just don’t have a conventional way of showing it. But if you are willing to change, I can help you with that, okay?”

“Okay. I love you.” “I love you too. Now, enough about this sad fest. Do you want to watch a movie or something” “Sure, you choose.”

I picked some dumb comedy on Netflix and got back to my place on his chest. His hand never left my body, caressing my skin all the time. We kept quiet, only laughing when something funny happened. It was around the second half of the third movie that I spoke up again.

“I’m gonna fuck Tim for real.” “What is it with you and this obsession for Timothy?” “Oooh, Timothy. What, you were the one that said I could fuck whomever I wanted.”

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Translations: Arschloch: asshole Schatz: sweetheart Meine Königin: my queen

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