#i just want to listen to chill songs and make up silly banter

[coolnonsenseworld]

(this is part of the calendar 2024 lore, now on pre-order, to know more check out prev posts)

April was Keith's idea of relaxation. He enjoyed parks, the feng shui of them, nature's ability to thrive despite and against anything happening - the silence of it. Watching Keith wind down and relax when he is a strung wire most of the time, would definitely make Lance feel all lovey-dovey and clingy (as he tends to get) and when he’d worry he is disturbing, Keith would comment this is exactly how it should be - the constant yin to his yang, and the yang when he feels yin.

Also - both shirt and hoodie are Keith's (he has way too many hoodies with quotes). Lance took the hoodie for Keith, but Keith insisted he won’t get cold, so he wore it himself. On the way home Lance funds Keith the biggest sushi serving he could find on the menu, and, believe me, nothing lights up Keith's eyes like a table full of rice and algae. Lance just watches with a soft smile. (Keith does end up getting cold)

[carebearbliss]

Stray Kids as your boyfriend

Chan: the considerate/selfless boyfriend

Honestly, is there anything he wouldn’t be willing to do for you?

His personality is just made out of 100% boyfriend material

Would probably give you the world if he could (his heart is as big as the moon let’s be honest here)

And with that, would probably automatically give you a couple of his sweaters before you even asked for them (or tried to steal them)

Would regularly check up on you, both mentally as well as physically, to make sure you’re okay

The type to care more about you than he would for himself, goes out of his way to make sure you know that you are loved

One word: C U D D L E S 

So so so gentle with you, wouldn’t want to do anything to hurt you ever

Sings you to sleep over the phone when you can’t fall asleep

Midnight conversations about the most innocent/most random of things, like how fluffy marshmallows are or how soft your hair is

Minho: the playful/sarcastic boyfriend

His presence alone is enough to make you feel comfortable

The type that will always be there for you and quietly stand by your side

Would help you out with practical tasks without you asking

Lots of sarcastic bantering and back-and-forth teasing, which probably includes playful insults as a normal way of conversating

Very patient and understanding

A very good listener, he would be the type to remember random things about you or ask in-depth questions to get to know you better

Lots of movie dates at home, incl. a pillow fortress and plenty of snacks

Surprisingly funny and confident/daring at times, which makes you either cringe or blush honestly

Has these random moments in which he says something flirtatious suddenly and catches you off-guard

Weird dance battles shall and will ensue

Also midnight conversations, but mostly about the weirdest existential topics like how aliens would look like if they existed or whether clones exist

Changin: the chill boyfriend

Would never yell or raise his voice to his girlfriend, ever

Treats you like a Princess with a capital letter P

But at the same time you’re also his homegirl y’know what I mean?

Recommends his favorite songs to you, occasionally makes you a playlist as well

Chilling at each other’s place, just listening to music, catching up and talking about your interests or what happened during the day

Talks brags about you constantly to his members

Very proud to have you as his girlfriend and wouldn’t be afraid to let you know either (if you didn’t already)

Secretly acts kinda cute at times, especially when he’s excited and you two are having fun

Lots of time spent in the recording studio, with you listening to and evaluating his rapping and the lyrics he has written

Very protective of you, looks out for you even from a distance just to make sure everything is safe and okay

Hyunjin: the caring boyfriend

Can be quite shy at the beginning, but wants to make sure you feel at ease and so asks a lot of questions

Conversations about how your day was, talking about your concerns and comforting you through his kind, sincere words

Hugs and snuggles, and lots of ‘em

Listens attentively to whatever you have to say, remembers little details about you and brings them up occasionally

Tries his hardest to understand you and be empathic towards your circumstances and struggles

The type to smile at you shyly after holding your hand or kissing you (for the first time)

Blushes easily but that doesn’t stop him from initiating PDA

When he’s having a hard time, you’re the first person he would go to for comfort and a listening ear

Lowkey clingy but mostly when you two are alone together

Entire albums on both of your phones full of cute pictures of each other to look through when you’re apart and missing one another

Han: the enthusiastic boyfriend

Lives to make you smile every second you’re spending time with him

Tries out all his pickup lines on you just cause he can

Lowkey says flirtatious stuff just to make you blush, but if you retaliate with a flirtatious line of your own, he’ll get shy

Tbh he’d flirt with you all the time, even if you guys are already in a rocksolid relationship

Proudly proclaims to his members that he has the best girlfriend

Dramatically supportive of you every step of the way

The type to randomly show up at your house with a cake and some balloons to celebrate you passing your exams (or any other occasion, honestly)

Always tries to be his happiest around you

Likes to be close to you, doesn’t necessarily have to be PDA, just likes to be near you as much as possible

Loves to see you eating well, also loves spoiling you with food for that matter 

Felix: the best friend boyfriend

Weird and out-of-control dance battles all. the. time.

A lot of your free time is spent doing silly dances with him or copying memes/making TikTok videos, just goofing around casually

Laughs at all of your jokes, even the ones that ain’t that funny

If you compliment him, even on the tiniest of things, it’ll make his day for a whole week

Finds everything you do to be absolutely adorable

It doesn’t matter where you are or what you two are doing, when you’re together it’s just going to be a good time and y’all know it

Always amazed at how great of a person you are, genuinely looks up to you

Just a general appreciation for having you by his side to comfort and support him when he needs it

Lots of casual snuggle sessions while you’re just chilling

Crazy sing-offs just to see who can sing the loudest/highest

Inside jokes are a must you hear me

Treasures any gift you ever give him like it’s basically his most valuable possession

Seungmin: the sweet boyfriend 

This guy is honestly such a sweetheart, periodt

Not a big fan of PDA, but still likes to hold your hand when you’re walking next to each other

You’re the first person he goes to when he has some exciting/good news to share

Basically, you’re his best friend, and he’s yours :)

Very go-with-the-flow, open to trying out whatever it is you want to do (unless it’s highkey dangerous)

Very gentle & gentlemanly, always takes you into consideration to make sure you don’t feel uncomfortable

When you’re sad, comforts you with lots of comfort food and Disney marathons

Compliments you and says the sweetest things to you just to make you smile

Rarely ever says no to anything you ask of him

Calls you up or texts you out of the blue just to ask you how your day was, then actually listens attentively to anything you have to say

Likes to take lots of pictures of you when you’re on a date

Day6 concert dates y e s

Jeongin: the good/kind boyfriend

Treats you like he’d treat his good friends, but including occasional blushing, internal panicking and shyly looking away when you stare at him for too long

Tries really hard to be a good boyfriend to you, tries to pay attention to your interests and what you have to say

You can’t help but develop a soft spot for him (like the rest of Stray Kids)

Sometimes you make him really nervous, but he’d still randomly initiate PDA like holding your hands 

Ruffles your hair every time you do something that he finds to be adorable, which is kind of always?

Randomly boops your nose then gives you a huge smile

Just really happy when he sees you, like a small pup whose owner just got home y’know?

Melts into a puddle when you compliment him

Doesn’t really care about what you guys are doing, as long as you’re together

The type to watch kdramas just to figure out what kind of romantic gestures he can surprise you with

Then shows up at your doorstep with flowers he picked along the way and a cute card

[skinks]

Please Please talk to me about Maggie Tozier and what she’s like and looks like and what Dilfworth Tozier loves about her and made him put a ring on it and in general how much her two boys love her and how she loves them.

[cracks knuckles] here we go

I was looking through my copy of the book yesterday to answer this ask but then I figured, y’know what? Canon can suck it. I tend to beat myself up over accurate characterisation for Richie and Eddie, but they’re main characters, Maggie and Went are not, so the details are inconsequential. Their ages in the Dilfworth fic mean that they’d have a pretty different life experience from their book versions, what with growing up in the 60s/70s, but imo all that matters is that they love Richie and are good parents. Canon is ours now!!!

- my no.1 headcanon rn is that Maggie sings like an angel, and sings all the time. In the car, in the shower, gardening, housework, cooking. She and Went have a pretty good record collection, but if Went is listening to something and hears Maggie singing to herself in another room of the house he shuts that shit off quick so he can hear her.

- I wrote in ithots that Richie busts out into song at the drop of a hat, right? well, where Richie gets encouragement with his Voices through Went participating, Richie gets his incessant singing from Maggie, because he grew up in a household where that was welcomed.

- Maggie doesn’t even notice she’s doing it until Richie joins in, or she turns around and sees Went gazing at her all dopey, and she gets self-conscious

- until Went is like “I don’t know why. You know I think you’re a songbird” and then grins and calls her Magpie. She says stop. He says, Maggie-pie? She throws a dishcloth at him but secretly loves it because she fell in love with how frank and practical he is most of the time, but also how silly he is only when it comes to her and Richie.

- he only calls her that when they’ve had one too many anyway, otherwise it’s all sweetheart, honey, darling, Mags. Marguerite, in Richie’s stupid French Waiter Voice. “Yes ma’am” for when he’s rearranging her guts. Maggie’s the one to call him “my love” the first time, but she said it kinda exaggerated and jokey, and Maggie just doesn’t joke the way Went and Richie do so Richie noticed the way his dad just cracked tf up and was like wow, Mom must be really, really funny

- so y’know how Richie calls Eddie “my love” in the book, and is generally quite physically affectionate? He picks all that up from his parents, watching their example. Wants to make Eddie laugh like that

- for some reason I always imagine she speaks like, French or Italian fluently. I’m stealing @honeyreynolds hc that her maiden name is Avery for Tex Avery, but maybe her own mother was European. She tries to speak French with Richie as a baby/toddler so that he’ll be bilingual, and she’s so proud/frustrated because he’s clearly smart and has a knack for linguistic imitation, but his attention span is just. Non existent

- still makes lil kid Richie giggle by doing exaggerated Italian and making him guess what she’s saying

- I think she’s pretty elegant and reserved and almost shy on the surface with a rly wry sense of humour, so people tend to think she’s snooty, but she’s just... so concerned with keeping the peace and not saying anything bad about someone. Tries to see the best in people. This can lead to a lot of embarrassment when Went is so upfront and medical-frank about stuff or if Richie’s being a dumbass in public, but really she just envies their typically masculine lack of inhibition

- this is because she’s got this killer wicked streak. Maggie’s got a hidden well of scathing diatribes and Went knows it because

- they met on a plane in 1971 when Maggie was flying back to college for her final semester of senior year, and the man in the seat next to her started having an attack of some kind. The stewardesses appeal desperately for any doctors on board, nobody answers. Anyone at all? We’ll have to land the plane! Maggie’s trying to slowly shift away from this man and his spasms without seeming rude when she hears a deep sigh in the seat behind her and someone saying “I’m ethically bound to admit I have a licence in dentistry,” in a voice like he’s in on some joke nobody else knows.

- this guy unfolds the longest legs she’s ever seen and comes to squat right next to her and her apparently dying seat partner, she notices he’s nice looking and keeps glancing at her, there’s banter. Eventually he shrugs and is like “imo this man has a bad case of wind.” And Maggie just TEARS Went a new one like oh nice diagnosis DOCTOR DENTIST where’s your seatside manner?!?! what kind of name is WENTWORTH anyway! and Went’s like 👀😳😍 and then the dying man lets out a giant fart and Maggie recoils, all her pretty poise and indignation turning to base disgust and Went bursts out laughing and offers her the seat next to him

- turns out his first residency is in the next town from Maggie’s college. She’s only dated preppy meatheads before who only ever tried to flatter her and stopped listening when she talked about her music theory degree or the books she likes. But Went always grins and side-eyes her and cranks the volume whenever Maggie May comes on the hits station, because then she’ll whack him with a book. She’s so SWEET he loves goading her into releasing some more of that plane rage, like one day she’s prowling on the edge of a rant about her TA and trying to be reasonable. Went’s like, do it. You’ll feel better. So she fuckin rants her head off for ten minutes until her hair’s all dark and wild like an Arthurian queen and she looks over at Went reclining all impressed on her dorm bed and he’s like. I have never been more in love in my life. Can you sit on my face and make fun of my name again

- so yeah they’re both like, quietly distinguished and outwardly calm model citizens of Derry but in private Went is the fuckin roastmaster and is Maggie’s outlet for frustration whenever housewife suburbia gets too much

- I always picture her as having dark and quite curled hair, sort of Lauren Bacall eyes, and she’s probably tall too. Like 5’8 to Went’s 6’0 or 6’1 which is why Richie turns out to be 6’2 lmao. A family of giants. Honestly the whole time I was writing the Dilfworth fic I was imagining Mary Elizabeth Winstead, that’s my early-30s Maggie that Went is so excited to come home he’s stocking up on condoms. God I bet she’s got some of those single dark beauty mark freckles on her stomach 🥵 Wears hats with big brims. Sundresses. Secretly likes to pretend she’s on a mysterious trip to Rome as she sits in the park watching Richie catch dragonflies. Maybe when she’s older and Richie’s a teenager she looks kinda like Olivia Williams, bc I’ve had a big milfy thing for her ever since she was the mother in the 2003 Peter Pan.

- most kids in Derry have a crush on either Richie’s mom or dad or both and this is unfortunately quite damaging to his self esteem, even though Maggie INSISTS he’s just so handsome. She hates seeing him so insecure

- she tried pot once in college and hated it. The only times she comes close to getting hammered is on book club wine because it’s the only way she can get through them asserting the female orgasm doesn’t exist, then she comes home mildly tipsy and joins in on Went and Richie’s raucous game of cards

- felt a bit left out when Richie was small, with how well Went was able to go along with the silliness. Went sees this and gets Richie to make up a game where she’s Queen Margaret of the Tozier Court and made Richie a knight. They all spoke in bad Medieval Voices all afternoon, and it becomes one of those super long-running family jokes, and Maggie still feels all happy inside whenever Queen Margaret comes up

- ruthless decision maker!!! She had to be, because Went’s so laidback he’s horizontal and is always like “idc what we do as long as you guys are chill” and Richie can’t concentrate long enough to pick what colour gumball he wants, so she has to be staff sargeant. They go to Disneyland and she’s like C’MON BOYS HUP HUP HUP and Went’s like “oh cripes son we’re being hustled!!” but they love it as much as she loves them doing what she says

- great cook because of her indeterminidely Mediterranean mother.

- she genuinely wants to understand Richie’s strangeness but is also stumped as to what to do to bond with him, since she can only think of things she’d do with a daughter. She WANTS to brush Richie’s curls and bake with him but she thinks he wouldn’t like it, so they stick with singing. Is delighted when Eddie very politely and very intensely asks for her help making Richie a birthday cake. She sees how different they are together, and remembers Richie coming home at 5 years old declaring he was gonna marry Eddie Kaspbrak when he grows up, and she thinks... well, if I must have a son-in-law, I would love this one as much as I love my son.

[retvenkos]

Okay so I’m personally offended with myself for not having found you earlier? Like, YOURE AMAZING! Your writing is super awesome and I’m glad I finally did find you. Anyways, I was hoping I could request a 🔥 ship/HCs? For BBC Merlin, PJO/HOO, and ATLA (or LOK, whichever you’d prefer or is easier for you). I am bisexual so I’m down to be shipped with whatever gender (although I am kinda leaning towards men rn). I’m a Ravenclaw and my Myers-Brigg personality type is INFP-T. I’m kind of a nerd and I love learning new things. I tried to learn Latin at one point but it was while I was in school and I didn’t finish before the school year was up. I love reading, writing, singing, listening to music, watching movies and watching musicals. I also really love physical affection (both giving and receiving). I love any and all animals SO MUCH. I can be kinda silly sometimes but I know when to get serious. I love having fun with my friends but I also just love the days that I can just sit with them and relax. I’m pretty protective of the people I’m close to. I’m also kind of stubborn. I have a small obsession with dragons and kind of just mythical beings in general. I feel happy when I make others happy. I like helping people when I can. My main love languages are physical touch and words of affirmation. If I were a bender in the ATLA/LOK universe, I would be an earth bender. I’m also a sucker for soulmate AUs, which you might have noticed when I was reblogging your stuff earlier. I think that’s all?? If you need anything else, just let me know! And thank you so much!!

PS: CONGRATS ON 2.5k

thank you for your kind words about my blog! i’m glad you like it here, lol. and, as always, disclaimer that it’s been a while since i’ve read pjo and so the headcanons might not be the best. bear with me.

Merlin:

I ship you with Gwen!

alright, i was debating between gwen and sir leon, but i 100% believe gwen is the perfect match-up for you - both of you are sweet and kind yet clever with the potential to be teasing, annoying idiots.

the two of you would get along famously, and you would be the sweetest, most supportive couple - literally everyone wants what you have, and i can’t blame them.

both of you are caring and love your friends dearly, you are the ultimate mom friends. you love to make everyone happy, and so both of you are always looking out for the other. 

furthermore, gwen would love to hear all about interests - she loves to hear you talk about your reading and writing, and she loves how you learn with such a fervor. learning something new is a great way to increase the quality of your life, and gwen loves to hear about what you’ve discovered - so much of her day is spent in routine, being a servant and all, so when you can tell her something good - something other than castle gossip, she loves it.

also, i have this headcanon that gwen can sing really well, so you know she loves music. she’ll sing in the early mornings, when the two of you are getting up before the sun itself, and it never fails to make you smile.

i think that both you and gwen have great versatility to your personality - you both can get very excited and giddy but then come back down to earth and be stable and strong. this is good because both of you can support the other in whatever situation you may be up against. 

furthermore, you are both witty and teasing. the two of you have a lot of ongoing banter that makes your otherwise monotonous days exciting and fun. you’re upbeat personalities bring joy to your lives, and that’s important.

also, the two of you would be very affectionate toward each other - gwen has no qualms with hugging you or holding your hand, so she is able to accept your affection and return it in a similar manner. and gwen is very good at giving sincere compliments! whenever she praises you, you can’t help but think it’s true.

also, modern! au gwen is an avid movie watcher, so the two of you have marathons together. gwen always brings the popcorn.

PJO/HOO:

I ship you with Travis Stoll!

okay, you cannot tell me that this pairing isn’t chaotic as hell.

you are the smarts to travis’ mischievousness, and the two of you bring a lot of fun to camp half-blood. you help travis and connor with their pranks, but you are also there to make sure that no one gets hurt, because a good prank is one that makes people laugh, but has minimal casualties. (ngl, chb is kind of glad that you and travis got together because the pranks are a lot safer now.)

i definitely think that travis would be the one to bring you out of your comfort zone, but he does it so earnestly, with only the best of intentions, so it’s hard to say no. the two of you go on adventures together and you have a lot of laughs.

the good thing is that you also bring a lot of calm and stability to the relationship - you are one of like two (2) people who can  get travis to just,,, chill with you. he likes to play videogames with you, so you hang out a lot in the hermes cabin, legs tangled together as you chill out. 

at your core, i think both of you are very determined people, and that’s what initially drew the two of you close together. you both have a fire in your hearts, and while that comes out in different ways, you’re both very ambitious and goal oriented people.

and you know that travis has the greatest taste in music - you are going to be introduced to some very interesting and cool songs. maybe he’ll nick a cd or two for both of you to listen to. and what’s cool about his music taste is that it’s adventurous and all over - he loves everything and so do you.

you both explore and learn about the world in different ways, and you are both incredibly knowledgeable in opposite ways, so when you put your heads together, the genius that comes forth is insane.

i imagine that the two of you hang out in the strawberry fields a lot. you listen to music or talk while walking through the fields, and then travis ends up stealing some of your strawberries and you end up chasing after him (damn his tall legs)

LOK:

I ship you with Mako!

this is the complete opposite of your previous ships, but stick with me for a minute

you are perfect for mako because you can be serious and stable, but at the same time, you can bring out his silly side. mako needs someone who can get down to the core of his being and pull out that happy, childish side of himself that he hasn’t found in a long time. he’s had to grow up fast, and he needs someone who is serious and sincere, but is also lighthearted and oh-so caring.

the two of you are so protective and caring about the ones you love - you’re like the parents of the group who are trying to wrangle your unruly children, and it’s a dynamic i am here for.

and when you encourage some of korra or asami’s wild plans, mako sighs, like “disappointed by not surprised.” but then you bring him to the side with a plan on how to make their optimistic plans more secure, and he’s like,,,, alright.

also, the banter the two of you would have is legendary. mako is known as the #done, sarcastic one, and he was not expecting you to come out with amazing wit, but here you are. the two of you have the best side commentary, and it’s almost a competition now. you’ve yet to get mako to laugh at your well-timed jokes (some of which are terribly corny), but he does crack a wry smile almost every time, so you know it’s only a matter of time.

also, convince me otherwise, but mako is a reader. he likes a lot of historical fiction, but also stories based off of legends, and the two of you will often spend your weekends inside, reading on the couch. he’ll make you lunch and then the two of you will talk about what you’ve read, sitting cross legged with your knees touching. mako is usually a little vague with the details on what he is reading, but what often happens is that he’ll have recommended the book you’re reading, so he’ll listen to you ramble about your favorite parts with a lovestruck smile on his face.

you definitely introduce mako to more music - he’s never been super into music, it was always more bolin’s thing, but he’ll listen with you. he has a few favorites, and you have to coax him into telling you what they are, but he’ll tell you anyway because he’s very much in love.

also! the two of you go to see bolin’s movers, and you whisper to each other throughout the show, making jokes and funny comments, and ngl, bolin gets a little concerned. mako should never enjoy himself so thoroughly, that only ever leads to disaster.

anyway, you would be great for mako because when you two hang out, you bring mako out of his shell, and he is always there to support and protect you, should anything go awry. 

i get big vibes of “the serious one is soft for the fluffy one” except both of you are the serious one and the fluffy one, depending on the moment, and you wildly fluctuate between the two.

[glassbangtan]

Behind the Production {Kim Namjoon}

Words: 6k

  Summary: It was strange how a year and a half of coffee runs could make you fall in love.

  Genre: fluff

  Warning: nothing

  Notes: masterlist – I may have gushed about Namjoon's legendary mind in this fic but i'm not editing any of it out.

   ---

    His name was Kim Namjoon. Tall, broad, dimpled. He liked his coffee with only a little bit of milk, though he didn't mind if you delivered it to him black. He always had a grateful smile and a bow to give to you whenever you walked in the door, despite you being a few years younger than he was.

   He had the job you wanted. He was doing it all, living the life you craved, living the life he truly did deserve with the work ethic he put in. There were some days when you would walk into the studio in the mornings to see he had yet to move from the previous day, multiple cups of coffee emptied at his side, his head ducked into his hands as he clicked away at the computer. On these days, you had to force yourself to ignore him; if there was one thing that annoyed the calm man that was Kim Namjoon, it was telling him he worked too hard.

   He didn't believe in those words. He thought they were ridiculous. How could someone possibly work too hard? There was no such thing. You either did nothing, or you worked. That was how it was. To him, there was no limit on how many hours he could spend dawdling over the same song over and over, drafting and re-drafting a beat that, at the end of the day, would be modified in mixing anyway.

   He never minded that, though. The finished product that he got to hold in his hands for a few minutes before it was passed on was enough for him, and perhaps that was why you found yourself so enamoured by the man.

   He knew your name. He saw you every day, what with you appearing in his office with a fresh cup of coffee every few hours. It wasn't like he was completely oblivious to your presence, because unlike a lot of other people who worked at Bangtan Studios, Namjoon actually took the time to get to know the people who were doing him favours. He was kind like that.

   But you didn't think you had the right to label him as much more than a work colleague, an acquaintance at a push. You definitely couldn't call him a friend, not without sounding strange. Mainly because you two had a firm business-oriented relationship, and that was all there was to it. You took what you could get.

   It was yet another drowsy Monday morning. Korea had finally made the tipping point from autumn to winter, meaning the biting chill of October had gradually become unbearable as December arrived. You huddled yourself beneath an oversized black coat which drifted far past your knees, forcing you to walk as if your shoes had somehow ripped against the wet concrete, but you didn't care. You were freezing, and be damned with anybody who looked at you funny.

   Namjoon's cup of coffee was in your hand. A little bit of milk, two sugars – the same order you had been repeating back to the barista at the local coffee shop every morning for the past year and a half. It was beginning to become repetitive, but Namjoon didn't like change. You had once overheard him telling Min Yoongi that, if his coffee order changed, he somehow felt as if his style of production changed, too.

    From that day on, you had made sure to double check his order was right before delivering it to his office.

   Pushing past your obvious fatigue, you arrived at Namjoon's office and racked your knuckles against the door. Once upon a time, doing such a simple action would have left you feeling nervous, butterflies swarming your stomach at the idea of seeing his face – would he invite you in today, perhaps ask if you wanted to listen to some lyrics he had been drafting? It wasn't a far stretch of the imagination to think of him doing such a thing; on multiple occasions, Namjoon had invited you in and asked for your opinion on certain things, but it had never felt like anything more than an innocent matter of is this good?

   It had been a year and a half, though. You didn't live in a romance movie. You weren't constantly smitten every single time you saw Namjoon's face, wasn't completely thrown off the rocks as soon as he opened the door and graced you with that perfect smile that had dimples so deep you were fairly certain somebody could move in to them and live quite comfortably.

   The door opened. You looked up, smiled even before his face came into view.

   “Good morning,” you chirped. “I come bearing gifts.”

   Namjoon chuckled, opening the door to full capacity. “As you always do. How are you this morning?”

   “I'm good. It's freezing outside, though.” To exaggerate your statement, you let out a small brrr and tucked your hands deeper into the oversized sleeves of your coat.

   Namjoon chuckled, but the noise came to an abrupt stop as his eyes raked over your form. You hadn't been lying when you said it was cold outside – in fact, you were still trying to warm yourself up even as you stood in the entranceway to Namjoon's studio. There was still a small, but noticeable, shiver to your shoulders.

    “But I'm fine,” you quickly added, not wanting Namjoon to worry.

   “You didn't even get yourself a coffee,” he said, raising a brow as he inspected his own beverage. “I could have cashed out an extra £3 for you to get yourself something to drink, Y/N. It's not an issue.”

 Your eyes widened. “What? No. I'm fine, Namjoon. It was-”

  But Namjoon had already turned on his heel and re-entered his office. He left the door open, a silent invitation for you to follow him. You stepped a hesitant foot inside, looking around at the figures adorning the walls and the fancy lights which kept this place looking much more futuristic than it needed to – it was cool, though it looked extremely expensive.

   Namjoon made his way over to his desk and dragged his wallet out of the first drawer. Immediately you were by his side, grabbing on to his wrist and shaking your head. “Namjoon, I swear to-”

   “How much is a coffee these days?” he asked. “I'll give you a tenner. Then you can get yourself something to eat, as well.”

   He tried to shove the ten pound note into your hand, but you were quicker than he was. You jerked your arm back, furrowing your brows at him as if you were scolding a child. Namjoon could only grin at your expression, continuing to hold the note out to you.

    “I can buy my own coffee, thank you very much.”

  “I'm sure you can,” he replied. “But I'm buying it for you today.”

    “No you're not.”

   “Is that a challenge, Y/N?”

  You faltered, trying desperately to ignore the thundering sound of your heartbeat  – curse him. Curse him and the way he could turn from friendly-oversized-teddy-bear to possessing a sudden growl in his voice that made your legs genuinely quiver beneath you.

   He was only changing his tone so he could get under your skin, and you refused to give him that satisfaction. You were a grown woman. You could stand your ground if you -

   Namjoon saw leeway in your moment of distraction.

   He was suddenly lurching forward, wrapping his fingers through the pockets of your oversized coat and tugging you into him firmly. Your chest hit against his own, and that was enough to have you blanking out of the situation almost immediately. His warmth engulfed you. You could feel his fingers in the pockets of your coat, pushing the ten pound note securely into the confines.

   You pushed him away, a smile beaming across your features as he laughed at his own actions. He swivelled around, looking back at his computer before taking an all-too-casual sip of his coffee.

   “Now, no more arguing with me,” he said. “I can even drive you to the coffee shop if it's still raining-”

   But you were already gone, yelling a quick goodbye over your shoulder before you slammed the door closed. You followed closely after it, pushing your back up against the wall and panting to catch your breath.

  What the hell? What the hell? What the hell?

   If you were any less wise, you would have assumed that Namjoon had just had banter with you, a direct contrast to the professional relationship you were so used to having with him. He never spoke to you like that, never had moments of playful fun with you – in fact, the only time he actually allowed you to step foot in his studio was whenever he needed a second opinion on something and you were the only one there to help him. Never before had he thought too much about the fact that you bought his coffee every morning and hardly ever indulged to buy yourself one.

   You swallowed thickly, trying to shake the feeling of his chest against yours free from your brain. God, you were like a school girl with a silly crush. As you pushed yourself off the wall and headed back down to the lobby, you had to keep reminding yourself that you were a grown woman, that you were meant to be professional in your place of work. The fact that Namjoon had been acting a little different today could not destroy the professional reputation you had built up for yourself in this place.

   You refused.

  Even if it was most tempting.

    +

   “-and apparently there's these chemicals in the water that have been known to be, like, toxic to humans or something.” Hoseok shook his head, still staring at his untouched glass of water with furrowed brows. “Do you believe it?”

   “Hm?”

  Hoseoks eyes flicked upwards, finally breaking away from his glass. He narrowed his eyes when he saw that you were, indeed, lost in your own head just as much as he was. Perhaps that was why the both of you were such close friends – you could sit for hours and hours and just daydream about the tiniest of matters, and neither of you would care.

   Now, though, you weren't daydreaming about made up scenarios. Though you tried desperately to hide it, Hoseok could clearly see the frown on your face, the crease between your brows, the way you clenched and unclenched your fists in an any attempt to remain in the real world before the memory of what had happened today threatened to drag you into oblivion.

   Hoseok let out a breath and leaned back. “Oh, so you're serious serious.”

   You looked over at him, raising a brow. “What?”

   “Well, usually I just leave you to mope on your own, but your moods have never lasted this long. That means something is actually bothering you, and as your best friend, it's my duty to figure out what it is and help you overcome it.”

  “I'm not even in a mood.”

   “Your face would tell me otherwise, but I guess you can lie if that helps you sleep at night.”

   You frowned, flushing despite yourself. Hoseok, like you, was slowly making his way further up the ladder when it came to music production. He had started working in the choreography sector before swiftly deciding that he wanted to try his hand at music production. His close relationship with Min Yoongi had helped him bag a position as an apprentice in Bangtan Studios, meaning he spent the majority of his time shadowing Yoongi, learning all the nicks and tricks that came with producing music.

    The two of you had met after having a spontaneous race up the stairs one morning, induced purely by the boredom that came with being apprentices in a place full of busy professionals who refused to look away from their work for more than two seconds.

    “So are you gonna tell me what's wrong?” Hoseok continued. “It's not the chemicals in the water, is it? That hasn't even been confirmed yet, so I wouldn't worry too much about it.” Even as he said it, he tossed his plastic cup of water into the bin beside him.

   You shook your head. “I don't care about the water, Hoseok.”

  “Then what is it?”

   You raised a brow, tilted your head forward as if to say you really don't know? It took Hoseok only a few seconds to catch on to what exactly it was you were trying to get across – he knew this one. You had complained about this very matter a grand number of times already, and all Hoseok had to do was jog his memory back a little bit further, until-

   “Oh my god, it's Namjoon again, isn't it?” he exclaimed, a little louder than you were comfortable with.

   The cafeteria remained bustling and loud, with barely anyone shooting a glance in your direction, but you scrambled over the grey table nonetheless, slamming your hand against Hoseok's mouth. You loved the man to bits, but he had a habit of getting a little bit too overexcited over matters that most definitely were not exciting.

   Well, not exciting to you.

   “Would you be quiet?” you hissed. Hoseok grinned against your palm, his brown eyes growing wide as he tugged your hand away from his mouth.

  You sighed and slumped back in your chair. “Yes, it is Namjoon again.”

  “Oh, this is good,” he said. “I haven't heard news on Namjoon in ages! I thought he'd disappeared somewhere.”

   “You see him everyday.”

  “I thought your feelings for him had disappeared.” He raked his eyes over your body. “But clearly that isn't the case. What's gone on?”

  You pursed your lips, looking up at the top table where all of the big producers always sat during lunch hours. You were surprised to see Yoongi sitting in front of Shi Hyuk, considering he usually just bought his food and headed back to his studio. But of course, Namjoon had remained on brand and was no doubt still locked away in his own studio with little care to the fact that he needed to fuel his body every few hours.

    “Nothing too major,” you finally replied.

   “Did he finally admit his undying love for you?”

   “Absolutely not.”

   “Did you accidentally spill coffee down his shirt and he kissed you to tell you it was okay?”

  “No.”

   “Did he-”

  “He paid for my coffee this morning.”

   Hoseok fell silent. It was like the entire world had gone silent, leaving only the echo of your words to ring back into your ears. You winced at how cheesy they sounded – you really were coming off as a girl with a high school crush, but there was nothing you could do about it. That was what had happened, and it had affected you a whole lot more than you were willing to admit.

   At least, to anyone but Hoseok.

   The dancer blinked, staring at you. “Please say sike.”

  “I'm serious,” you said. “I showed up at his door this morning, just like I do every day, and he saw that I hadn't gotten myself a coffee, so he gave me a tenner to buy my own.”

   Hoseok's eyes popped open, his hands clapping against the table. “A tenner? A coffee can't be more than £4!”

   “That's what I said!” you exclaimed. “But he told me to get myself something to eat as well, and then whenever I refused to take the money-”

  “You fool. Have I taught you nothing?”

  “-he kind of grabbed onto my coat and pulled me into him so he could put it in my pocket himself.” You flushed, biting on your lower lip. “Then he tried offering me a lift to the coffee shop, but I panicked and left the room before he could finish his sentence.”

   Hoseok scoffed. “Of course you did. I expected nothing less from you.”

  You groaned, burying your face in your hands as the final strands of dignity were snipped away at your confession. Hoseok would never judge you – at least not seriously – which made talking about the situation a lot easier, but you remembered the way you had fled from the room, the way you had all but gawked at him whenever your faces were inches apart. You had made a complete fool of yourself. If Namjoon hadn't been aware of your crush on him before, then he most certainly did now.

      “Look, it's not that big of a deal,” Hoseok chuckled, reaching over and laying a calming hand on your arm. “You know how Namjoon gets – he starts a project, and he forgets everything else. I bet you anything he hasn't even thought twice about how you acted. He probably doesn't even care.”

   “The word probably is really giving me anxiety right now.”

   Hoseok squeezed your arm, prompting you to look up at him. His brown eyes were comforting, a small smile gracing his features, but it did nothing to soothe the bubble of panic still stirring in your stomach.

   “He's gonna think I'm crazy.”

   Hoseok rolled his eyes. “As if he doesn't think that already. Now, chin up. You have a full day of work to do today, and it's not gonna do you any favours to be moping around whilst you do it.”

    Despite yourself, the fatigue nipping at your bones, the embarrassment still prominent on your face, Hoseok was right. Namjoon was still in his office working hard, so you would do the same.

   You would leave the past in the past, and you would get stuff done.

   +

   “For fucks sake! No, no, no!”

   CRASH.

   You closed your eyes as if that alone could block out the sound of the box tumbling down the stairs behind you.

   The lifts just had to be broken today – the day that you had been assigned to drag boxes upon boxes of tech equipment up to the top level of the damn building.

    You had succeeded with three of the seven boxes, but the fourth one had caused you trouble. It was going to Yoongi's office, meaning it was top of the range, expensive stuff. Whilst Namjoon and Bang Shi Hyuk could sometimes make do with the odd cheap pair of headphones, or a second hand speaker, Yoongi refused to use anything that wasn't top of the market.

    And you had just dropped his top of the market equipment down an entire flight of metal stairs.

    You waited with bated breath, trying to fight back the tears of frustration which were quickly making their way to the surface. The hallways above were quiet. If you wished hard enough, maybe you could convince yourself that nobody had heard the boisterous crashing that came when hundreds of pounds worth of equipment was all but tossed over a railing.

   But of course, you hoped in vain.

   Shi Hyuk stuck his head over the railing above, looking down at you with a raised brow. Bang Shi Hyuk was one of the older producers, meaning it had always been a little difficult for you to form a bond with him. He spoke like a wise old man, but not in the same way Namjoon did. Namjoon was philosophical, had insight into the most random of things. With Namjoon, you could listen to him for ages.

   Bang Shi Hyuk spoke like an old man in the way that he was very stubborn with his views, often refused to get with the times. Meaning it never made him feel guilty to speak to people below him with a little bit of disrespect here and there.

   Especially assistants who had only been working there for a year and a half.

    “What did you just do?” was the first thing he said.

   You bit your lip, forced yourself to look up. Perhaps you could grab a bit of his respect if you looked him in the eyes as you admitted your mistake. “Uh . . . The lifts are broken and. . .” You trailed off, genuinely unable to finish your sentence with him looking at you with eyes made entirely of fire.

    His grip visibly tightened on the railing he was leaning over. “Please tell me it wasn't Yoongi's stuff.”

   “Uh...”

  “That was the most important box we ordered!” Shi Hyuk suddenly exclaimed. You flinched at his rise in volume, looking away as if his words had somehow slapped you in the face. “God, it's not like your job is difficult! We ask you to do one simple thing, and you somehow manage to mess that up as well!”

   “It was an accident! The boxes are heavy, and-”

   “Oh, the boxes are heavy, are they?” He clenched his jaw, shaking his head slowly. “Wanna know why they're so heavy? Because they cost this company thousands! And you've just chucked them down the stairs as if it's nothing more than a damn ragdoll!”

  “That really wasn't what happened,” you said quickly. “If you'll just let me explain-”

  “If I wasn't such a nice guy, I'd be giving you a bill for that equipment right now,” Shi Hyuk growled.

    You opened your mouth to respond, terror flooding through you – he had said that equipment had cost thousands. Though your wages were decent, there was no way in hell you'd ever be able to pay off a bill that high.

    “What's going on?”

   You slammed your mouth shut, the voice ringing through the hallways loud and clear. There was a sense of relief that came with it as you realised that you now had Namjoon to help you in this situation, but there was also a stirring feeling of absolute despair.

  Honestly, you just wanted to be alone right now.

   “One of the assistants managed to drop Yoongi's equipment down the stairs.”

  “The expensive one?”

  You cringed as Bang Shi Hyuk nodded.

   Namjoon's face appeared over the side of the railing, his eyes immediately meeting your own. You bit down on your bottom lip, tried your hardest to give him a small wave that might mean something if there wasn't a pool of tears currently taking perch in your waterline.

   Namjoon's features softened when he saw you. “I'm sure it was an accident.”

  “Accident or not, that's a good thousand pounds down the drain,” said Shi Hyuk. “Yoongi isn't gonna be happy.”

   “Yoongi will understand,” Namjoon said, giving you a smile. “Y/N, why don't you come up to my studio? I'll send someone down to pick up the stuff downstairs.”

   You faltered, brows furrowing in confusion. Even Bang Shi Hyuk looked startled at the offer, swivelling around to look at his co-worker with wide eyes.

   “Are you serious?” he exclaimed.

   But Namjoon didn't entertain him with a response. He instead kept his eyes on you, making it clear that he wasn't joking, that he expected a reply.

   Your hands were trembling, you realised. The noise of the box falling down so many stories, the knowledge that you had every reason to be fired right now, the sound of Bang Shi Hyuk screaming to the high heavens had left you startled. You couldn't think of a better remedy than sitting in Namjoon's studio and listening to the soft music he always had playing through his speakers.

   So despite Shi Hyuk's clear disapproval for the arrangements, you slowly made your way up the stairs. Namjoon wrapped an arm around your shoulders, waved loosely to his boss before he led you down the halls to his studio.

   “You didn't have to stick up for me, you know,” you said as Namjoon kicked the door closed behind him. “I know I messed up.”

   Namjoon shrugged. “Everybody messes up here and there. I don't think you did it on purpose.”

  “I didn't. Yoongi would have my neck if I just tossed his stuff over the railings.”

   “See? That's why I'm not gonna sit here and scream at you for it. You clearly feel bad.”

   Namjoon's arm fell away from your shoulders. He made his way over to the corner of the room, and you watched as he rummaged through a box filled with loose nick nacks – most of it consisted of old figurines he had taken down from his shelves and replaced with others, though he shoved past all of them and pulled out a thin pink blanket.

   He turned, didn't say anything as he wrapped the blanket around your shoulders, not allowing you to protest. You wouldn't have protested anyway. The blanket smelled like his studio, a scent you had become increasingly familiar with over the past year and a half. You nuzzled into it, knotting your hands in the front to wrap it around yourself a little tighter.

   Namjoon slumped down in the chair in front of his computer. “You can sit down if you want.”

   Hesitantly, you did just that. You took the spinning chair next to his own, brought your knees to your chest – and then the room fell silent.

   The only thing you could hear was the clicking of his mouse, the small grunts of frustration he made whenever a certain bar wasn't working with the rest of the beat he had conjured up. With any other person, perhaps this type of silence would have been awkward, but it was different with Namjoon. Everything was a little different with Namjoon, as if he somehow managed to alter reality to make the person he was with a little bit more comfortable with their surroundings.

   Or maybe it was just him. Maybe it was just the aura he brought along with him that had you melting into the chair, relaxing despite the tremble of your hands and the situation that had taken place only a few minutes prior.

     He always had an energy to him, a type of pull that was difficult to ignore whenever you were around him as often as you were. The energy radiated whenever he would run into the lobby with a tiny little creature nuzzled in the palm of his hand, or whenever he would smile at you when you made accidental eye contact, rather than just looking away before you noticed his gaze. It would radiate whenever he was simply seated in front of you, doing what he loved to do most.

     You didn't realise you were smiling until he glanced over at you with a raised brow.

   “Are you okay?”

   You nodded quickly. “Yeah. I'm fine. I was just – uh – What are you working on?”

   This question alone brought that energy out of him. He leaned forward, a grin forming on his features as he gestured for you to lean forward, too, just to get a better look at his monitor. You did just that, examining the blocks on the screen that you knew represented a different snippet of recording – you had wanted to produce music for as long as you could remember. You knew exactly what it was you were looking at, and it looked nothing short of complicated.

    “It's a bit of a personal project,” he said, running his fingers over the screen. “Do you wanna hear some of it?”

  “I'd love to.”

   Namjoon pressed 'play' on the recording, and immediately your breath was dragged from your lungs. From the very first note you were left wanting more, intrigued by the delicate pattern of instruments that he had managed to bring together to create something that was unlike anything you had ever heard before.

   It was soft. There was a slight undertone of raindrops beneath the main instruments. To anybody else, such a detail would have been overlooked, seen as useless as nobody truly pays attention to the undertones, but Namjoon clearly didn't care about that. He did what he thought was right. He added things he thought would strengthen his music without thinking about the audience who were going to be listening to it soon enough.

   He made music for himself before anybody else.

   Whenever Namjoon's voice started, you were fairly certain you were going to start crying. He was a rapper, always had been a rapper, but there was a certain wistfulness that came with his singing voice – a singing voice you had only ever heard on the odd occasion, and something he had never taken seriously. You often heard him joking around with Yoongi, singing with a high tone that was clearly meant for entertainment purposes only – but this was real. This held emotion, feelings you didn't know Namjoon possessed.

   He was always a deep man, always looking into things a little more than everybody else. But this song just proved to you that his mind was a lot more legendary than you had ever given him credit for.

   The song faded to a stop, the title 'FOREVER RAIN' appearing on the screen. You sniffled, wiped a hand over your eyes, unable to form words that could even begin to describe the emotions you were feeling right now.

   Namjoon watched you closely, a playful grin on his face. “Did you like it?”

  “Shut up.”

  He raised a brow. “Should I take that as a good response?”

  You groaned, covering your face. “Namjoon, that was fucking beautiful and you know it! You're just asking me so you can watch me get all flustered.”

   Namjoon chuckled, attempting to tug your hands away from your face. You span around in your spinning chair, refusing to let him see you get so worked up over something that he no doubt saw as so simple.

   But it wasn't. The words you had just heard were not simple. They were anything but simple, and they had tugged at your heartstrings more than any other song ever had.

   “You're making me nervous now,” said Namjoon. “Come on. Let me see your face.”

   “No. I hate you for making me feel like this.”

   “Like what? You haven't exactly given me a good explanation as to what you're feeling.”

   “Are the tears not enough?”

   Namjoon laughed loudly. “Are you crying?”

   You groaned again, finally letting your hands fall into your lap – there was no point in hiding it any more. Namjoon's eyes raked over you, his brows raising at the sight of the tears playing at your waterline. You sniffled, pouted.

   “Wow,” he drawled. “I didn't take you as the emotional type.”

   “I'm not. But that song was . . . It was beautiful, Namjoon. You really have a way with words.”

   This time, it was Namjoon's turn to flush. He grunted, looking down at his lap where his hands were busy tugging his rings on and off of his fingers.

    “Well, I did show you a pretty personal song to start off. Maybe that's my fault.”

   “Yeah, maybe.”

   He chuckled. And then he was reaching forward.

    You caught the slow movement of his hand only seconds before his palm was resting against your cheek. His soft flesh was pressed against your own, the pad of his thumb wiping lazily at your cheekbones to rid you of the tears which had now started falling of their own accord. Your breath escaped you in a matter of seconds, body going rigid under his touch. You wanted to lean in to him, wanted to feel his warmth like you had only felt once before – that day, whenever he had dragged you into him with the most innocent of intentions, but had somehow managed to make you dash from his office a flustered mess.

   But this touch was nothing innocent. It wasn't sexual, either, but some weird in between that had your stomach erupting with butterflies. The need to feel more only intensified with each passing second.

   You watched the moment Namjoon realised just what it was he was doing. His eyes widened, his cheeks reddening rose before his hand was flinching away from your face. He tucked it beneath his knees, as if lack of restraint would make him touch you again.

   You blinked, unsure of what to say or do in this situation. Did you tell him it was okay? Because it was. It was more than okay. It was what you wanted, what you suddenly felt like you needed.

   Namjoon looked down at his lap, chewing on his bottom lip with clear nerves. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... That was awkward, wasn't it? You're probably so confused right now.”

  You nodded slowly. “I am . . . But I didn't think it was awkward.”

   His eyes shot up. “Hm?”

   “It wasn't awkward,” you repeated, more confident this time. “I actually kind of liked it. It was comforting.”

   He nodded slowly, though it was clear he hadn't quite latched on to what you had just said.

    You sighed, reached forward and grabbed his hand, dragging it into your lap before you could talk yourself out of it. His fingers closed around yours as if on instinct, though the widening of his eyes did not go amiss. He didn't flinch out of your grip, though. He watched your trembling hands wrap around his own, did not look away.

    “It's okay to touch people, you know,” you said, smiling warmly.

   “I know that,” he replied, his Adams apple bobbing. “It's just a little different when it's you.”

   That drew you up short. In fact, you were fairly certain you hadn't heard him right.

   You leaned forward, narrowing your eyes. “Sorry?”

    If possible, Namjoon's cheeks grew an even brighter shade of red. He tried to lean back in his chair, but you tugged at his wrist and pulled him forward again.

   “Wait, you can't just leave it at that!” you exclaimed. “What did you say?”

   “It wasn't important,” Namjoon mumbled. “Look, I have an awful lot of work to get to, and-”

   “Why is it different with me?”

  He faltered. His shoulders slouched forward in defeat and he looked at you through the tops of his eyelids. He was silent for a moment longer before he said, “Because I like you, Y/N. I like you a lot.”

    You stared. Staring was the only thing you could do as you waited for your brain to catch up with the words Namjoon had just spoken – words that, once upon a time, you would have never seen coming out of his mouth. Not in regards to you, anyway.

   Namjoon pulled his hand from your grip and ran it through his hair, finally able to slump back in his seat. “You don't have to say anything. I didn't confess to put you on the spot.”

   You shook your head dumbly. You wanted to reply, wanted to pour out your feelings for him but it was as if your mouth had been stuffed full of cotton balls.

   “I don't blame you if you don't want to talk to me again,” he said, adding a chuckle to soften the blow of his words. “I just hope this doesn't ruin your chances to do what you wanna do. Things don't have to be-”

  “Namjoon. Be quiet.”

   His lips zipped to a straight line.

  You leaned forward and pressed your hand against his cheek. He stiffened beneath your touch, but did not move away. Your thumb traced a careful pattern over his cheekbone, your eyes not once leaving his own.

    “Why are you so quick to assume I don't feel the same way?” you asked, voice light.

   Namjoon inhaled. “I just – I never thought a person like you could ever-”

  “Well, you're wrong.” You traced your thumb over his lips. He closed his eyes. “I like you too, Namjoon. I have for a very long time.”

   “You're not just saying that, are you?” he whispered. “Because that's cruel.”   “Ask Hoseok,” you chuckled. “He can confirm that what I'm saying is definitely truth.”

   Namjoon breathed out a sigh of what you could only hear as relief before he wrapped his fingers around the arms of your spinning chair and tugged you closer to him. You giggled when he pressed his forehead against yours.

    “It's been a year and a god damn half, and we've only just now decided to tell each other this vital piece of information,” he grumbled.

   You smiled. “We're both pretty oblivious, huh?”

   “Is that why you ran out earlier on when I gave you the ten pound note?”

  You flushed. “I was hoping you'd forgotten about that.”

  “Not whenever you reacted so cute.”

  “Alright, that's cheesy.”

   “Can I just kiss you already?”

  “Please.”

  And then he kissed you in such a Namjoon way that you very nearly giggled. Everything about his personality was unpredictable, and yet you always knew his kiss would be like this – soft, gentle, as if he were afraid of somehow breaking you if he went in too eager. His hands rose from the chair and gently cupped your face, tilting your head just that little bit to allow him access that you would have granted him anyway; you just wanted more of him, the most he could possibly give you.

   When you pulled away, the room felt a little bigger, as if the tension had been drained, leaving behind space you didn't know was there in the first place.

   “You do realise that we're still gonna have to deal with Bang Shi Hyuk later,” you whispered, pressing your forehead back against his own.

   Namjoon huffed out a breath, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and tugging you into his lap. “He can wait. I've waited a year and a half for this.”

[ff15trashgoldenslumbers]

Hey there!! I love your work and I was wondering if you could do a thing where a chocobro have a nightmare. A friend of the 4 join to help (perhaps like they are pretty much like their lil nurse on the go) but they wake up to the bro in a panic and soothe them back to sleep with a song. On the verge back to sleep the bro realize they are in love with them (I'd probably cry if you used the Stand By Me lyrics. A lot of your fluff ones make me cry bc they're soooo cute. f!friend if that's chill)

I do hope that you don’t mind if I did this OT4+1-ish, the idea sparked and then it wouldn’t leave. At all…it demanded!

~~~~~

You were trained not to panic, you were trained to stay calm in any situation that involved harm to yourself or your companions. You remain calm when you had sprained your wrist after yourself and your mount had fallen during an attack. You remained calm when you had jumped before that needle spray. You remained calm when your right side as pierced in confusion training when you had to assist with taking down a recruit.

So why was your body now attempting to make you cry, and shake?

You knew why you knew exactly why but you couldn’t allow that to happen. You had to brave, you had to be strong, you had to be calm for them.

While out on a hunt, the five of you had been surrounded by a group of deamons. Confusing as it was still very much bright outside. You had managed to dodge the spew that it tossed out, but your friends not so lucky.

They had begun to react to whatever this stuff was almost immediately, and as the healer of the group, you decided to actually put your authority for your position and call a tactical retreat. Nearly halfway back to the campsite, Noctis had passed out, Gladiolus not far after him. They were the ones in the main line of fire.

“Iggy, I hate to ask this, but can you please help with Gladdy.” You called, as Prompto helped you support Noctis.

You wanted to run back to the tent, but both Prompto and Ignis looked even worse. You had managed to get within the ruins before you had lost Prompto, and Ignis managed to help you get Gladiolus in before he fainted beside the big guy. That was fine enough, you could move Prompto and Noctis easily unlike the taller duo.

As your hands went to adjust them better, you jumped back, whatever they were covered in was starting to burn. With quick apologies to their unconscious bodies, you began to strip them, running out to the campfire, as you tossed them in. You’d apologize for the clothes but figured they’d much prefer being alive rather than have serious burns.

As you scrubbed them down with a few water bottles you had lying around, you found yourself starting to lose the tension within your shoulders and hands, as you found there didn’t appear to be lasting damage.

Until you heard Noctis cough.

You pulled out your phone, searching through your Monster Encyclopedia, it was a type of Malboro, the acid was supposed to aid in eating your friends, it had a 99.99% survival rate, but the symptoms lasted 48 hours, and could cause hallucinations and fever.

“You’ll be fine guys.” You cooed, pulling their sleeping bags over them. Leaning forward to remove Ignis’s glasses.

It was going to be a long 48 hours.

“Easy Gladdy.” You called, only 2 hours into this and the sun was just starting to set. The big guy was getting frustrated in his sleep and didn’t seem to enjoy whatever dream he was having.  You surrounded your hand with an ice spell, placing it on his head, only to smile as he calmed down. “You’ve gotta keep the covers on big guy, you have to sweat this out.”

“Y/N?”

You turned, smiling at Ignis he was slipping in an out of sleep, the guy never knew how to rest, “You thirsty Iggy? I don’t think you boys should stomach food until your stomachs settle.” You replied, the fresh memory of you shoving Prompto’s head into a bucket to avoid him throwing up over his sleeping bag again. Then again Prompto did have a weak stomach without being sick.

“If you’d be so kind.”

“Anything for you.” You cooed.

Eight more hours passed, as you figured they were out the worst of it, Noctis’s cough had stopped, Prompto managed to force down some crackers and ginger ale, and didn’t cough it back up. Ignis finally slept for more than twenty minutes at a time, and Gladiolus had stopped shiver.

You sat outside the flap of the tent, keeping it slightly unzipped so that they got some fresh air. You knew that you wouldn’t get much sleep tonight and would be up most of the evening to make certain they were fine.

You must have dozed slightly, cause next you recall was your head snapping up as you turned hearing a weak cry in the tent. You slowly crawled into the tent, eyes focusing on Noctis as he gave a slight trash, he was already prone to nightmares, so this poison running through his system more than likely wasn’t helping.

Crawling over Ignis, you maneuvered Noctis’s head to your lap, stroking back his sweat-soaked hair, performing another ice spell to try and get the fever that spike back up. A soft hum in your chest, it often caused the Prince to calm down from his other nightmares. Luckily it was working this time as well, he always liked the song despite how sad it made you feel.

“I won’t cry, I won’t cry

No, I won’t shed a tear

Just as long as you stand, stand by me”

You turned seeing Prompto grasp for something, he and Gladiolus were the biggest cuddlers of the group, which was often why they slept near each other, but having both of them bundled so tightly to sweat out the gunk more than likely didn’t help their urges.

Placing Noctis down softly you moved over to the two of them resting a hand on their chest, rubbing a circle. There was no potion or medication you could provide but you could give them comfort.

Well into the second day, you hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep, but by that evening the boys were able to sit up and actually stomach food enough to eat.

“Here, it’s just chicken soup, I’m not Iggy but you should be able to keep it down.” You replied, handing out bowls.

“It tastes awesome.” Prompto cooed.

You sat cross-legged in the tent, happy to see that they had gotten their color back, and with a good nights sleep they should hopefully be back to hundred.

“Have you gotten sleep, Y/N?” Ignis inquired.

You waved it off, “I’m fine. From what I read, you guys should be fine by tomorrow. So rest up, I’ll take care of everything.”

With fevers down, and stomachs actually feeling fine you laid them back for the night. Hoping that the would get some actual sleep tonight. You moved to sit outside the tent again, looking to the night sky. You felt so silly, but you realized what the problem was and why you panicked so much when they were hurt.

*

Most things couldn’t drag the Prince from his sleep but nightmares like this could. As of late, they would quickly disappear, still, his eyes were drawn across the tent when he heard Prompto whine. More than likely being cuddled by Gladiolus too roughly, he moved to lay back down, only to hear Ignis huff, and then one from Gladiolus too. Were they having nightmares too?

Y/N did mention that that stuff could do this.

Noctis hummed slightly at that, his nightmares didn’t happen too often now, when things got too bad in his dreams he’d feel a comfort and then the familiar scent of your lotion. He had started to drift again when he felt that comforting hand on his head, and that soft lullaby, only this time it wasn’t the normal one you sang.

What is this hollow kind of helplessness I’m feeling?

This type of terror is new

And the fact that I can hardly breathe is now revealing

How much I’ve changed ‘cause of you

Noctis tried not to show that he was awake, but a soft whine did leave him, as you moved over to Ignis, then Prompto and Gladiolus. Storking their head, as you softly sung the song for them.  

You must not have been exhausted as you hadn’t realized that the others were also slowly coming out of their rest to listen to the lullaby.

You light the world for me

You live life fearlessly

Braver than the bravest of us do

You trust, you hope, you dare

You choose to feel and care

I thought that I was strong till I bumped into you

What do I know about love?

As sleep came over the four men it dawned on them.

That was it…

*

You jumped back as the bacon popped grease, “How does Iggy do this at like 6 in the morning?” You huffed.

You never took the others for granted, but you were honestly missing them right now. Your banter with Prompto and Noctis, Ignis’s actual cooking that wasn’t just toast, eggs, and bacon, Gladiolus being able to help move the heavier items around camp.

“I have it.”

You nearly jumped from your skin, as you felt a hand on your own, “Iggy.”

“Please have a seat, you’ve done enough.” Ignis smiled.

“No, no you just got better.” You attempted to argue.

“Gladio, if you wouldn’t mind.”

You hadn’t even heard the big guy, until his hands were on your hips, picking you up and moving you to the chairs, plopping you down.

“When’s the last time you’ve been sleep?” Gladiolus asked standing before you.

“I got some sleep last night.” You replied, only to find the guy leaning into your personal space, not uncommon for your group of friends. “What?”

Gladiolus gave you a boyish smile, “Never realized how cute you look in the morning.”

The thought hardly register, before you felt him press a kiss to your forehead, something you had done last night to him while you thought he was sleeping. You went to retort but Ignis was already requesting his assistance with plating the food. Only to be brought back to reality when you felt Prompto hug you tightly,  also not uncommon.

“Morning Sunshine, hows your tummy?” You smiled, moving to grab his extra pills you held on your person.

“Much better cause of our white mage.” Prompto beamed, as you handed him the pills. “You’re the best, Y/N.”

You froze again, as you felt Prompto press a kiss to your cheek. Hardly hearing Ignis call for Prompto to wake Noctis.

“Here you are.” Ignis smiled, handing you a plate that looked nothing like what you were preparing. “You haven’t been eating the last few days, I hope this makes it better.”

“Thanks Iggy.” You called, he almost always gave you food first, even with Noctis at your side.

“My pleasure.” He replied, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead.

“This looks awesome Iggy.”

“I’m starving!”

You were honestly on autopilot eating your food, you could taste it but why were they exchanging kisses that you gave them last night? Only for you to turn as Noctis muttered walking out the tent, despiting sleeping for almost 48 hours he was still a lump.

“Morning Noct.” You flushed, as he pressed a quick kiss to your cheek, before flopping back into the seat. “Wait! Wait! What is going on here?”

“Is something the matter, Y/N?” Ignis asked, taking his seat beside you.

“I just, what?” You tried to explain, and keeping yourself from getting overheated and dropping your food. “What is going on, I don’t understand…the kisses…I mean I like them…but,”

“You sure you didn’t catch what we had?” Gladiolus chuckled.

“Maybe we should rest another day,” Prompto replied.

“You have not been resting well while taking care of us. You should rest in the car, I’m certain Noct and Gladio won’t mind you stretching out.” Ignis stated. “Besides you deserve a hotel.”

“Yeah maybe.” You replied you had been breathing in the fumes of the bile, and maybe tossing the bile sick clothes within the fire wasn’t your best idea, plus you had touched the bile quite a bit when handling the guys.

Within an hour, you had returned back to your journey, and fine with the fact that your four boys were healthy and ready to roll, your body finally allowed for you to sleep. As your head nodded forward, you hardly heard Ignis’s voice.

“Gladio, please catch Y/N.” Ignis called.

“Here she can use my jacket,” Prompto stated.

You felt yourself be moved across the seat and the soft lull of a heartbeat under your ear as Prompto covered you with his jacket.

“Here.”

“Awe you can be nice.” Gladiolus chuckled.

“Shut up.”

You spared a smile, but just before you drifted off, you knew that you didn’t imagine it, one of them was humming the song from last night.

You’re what I know about love

[archivistsrock]

The Boys in the Band, pt. 2: The Performance

Someone asked for a spoilery review, so I’m going to go into detail here. Maybe a mix of review, plot, and specific cute/hot things that happen during the show. I don’t really consider anything in the show to be “spoilery”, but if you’re planning on seeing this and just love surprises and not knowing anything about what’s to come...don’t read this, I guess. ;) [eta: Okay, so it seems like it’s mostly plot overview with random other observations sprinkled in. I’m not good at this! Also, I go into much more detail about the first half...it’s funnier, has more Matt, and I just peetered out]

Also, read on if you want deets on just how much Matt we see during the shower scene… :P

The general plot of the play is that Michael (Jim Parsons) is holding a birthday party for his friend Harold (Zachary Quinto). The entire play takes place in Michael’s apartment. There is an upstairs (bedroom and bathroom) and a downstairs (living room, mostly). If your seats are really close to the front of the stage, there will be some parts of the upstairs that will be blocked from your view. But they’ve cleverly placed mirrors on the ceiling, so what you can’t see straight-on, you can see in reflections. It’s not a problem at all. I was in the second row and was really worried I’d be too close and have obstructed sightlines, but I LOVED IT. You’re so close to the actors; it’s pretty amazing. I wouldn’t change my seats if given the chance. I think if I was able to see it again, I’d like to have a mezzanine seat. But I wouldn’t give up my up-close seat for the world. It was awesome. For...reasons...if you’re near the front, I think being left of center is better than to the right. Just as a tip, if you haven’t bought tickets yet.

Donald (Matt Bomer) is Michael’s best friend from college. He moved out of the city because he couldn’t handle all the people and stresses of city life. Donald is depressed. Loves to read. Likes to chill on the sidelines and just watch other people. He’s very caring. I totally dig Donald. He’s...a janitor? and works hard, but also has issues with failure that he attributes to his parents. He equates failure with receiving love. He’s known he was gay since forever. He drives into the city each weekend to see his therapist and visit Michael. He knows the other men that are invited to the party, but he isn’t in their friend group. He knows them bc he knows Michael, iykwim. He and Harold don’t seem to particularly like each other. Maybe bc they’re both best friends of Michael so there’s some competition/protectiveness?? idk. Haven’t thought about it enough.

Michael lives beyond his means. He’s also pretty depressed and has issues with being gay. I mean, that’s a huge theme of the play. How these guys deal with living in a time and place where society clearly doesn’t support or approve of homosexuality. As many of the actors have said in interviews, it’s interesting to see the play and notice how much things have changed, but also how many things in the play still resonate today. Oh, I guess it’s important to point out that it takes place in 1968.

The play starts with Michael in his apartment getting ready for the party. His doorbell rings and Donald enters. ::raucous applause:: The next 15 minutes (I’m really bad with time, so don’t take too much stock in that) is Michael and Donald talking with one another about their parents, lives, etc. General banter of friends. Donald notices that Michael is not drinking alcohol and hasn’t been for the last few weeks. He can tell because Michael gets mean when he’s drunk (keep this in mind). Michael says his therapist encouraged him to lay off drinking bc it’s obviously becoming a problem for him.

It’s been a long day and Donald needs a shower. ::extremely raucous applause:: So Matt strips down to his undies and walks around a bit. Lays on a bed. Adjusts himself. Lots of this is only seen through the mirrors on the ceiling. Not sure about people in the mezzanine? They might be able to just see him laying there, idk. Then he wanders to the shower and strips...ALL THE WAY DOWN to shower. So yes. Not only do we see Matt’s ass, but we see his dick, too. Where I was sitting, I only saw it in reflections, but still. HEY THERE, MATT’S DICK! :P Whether or not other people in different seats see more or less of him, I’m not sure. This is why I say that the left is better than the right. The shower is on the right side of the stage, and there’s a sink/pedestal in front of the shower. So I think some people’s view of Matt in the shower is blocked by the sink? I was at enough of an angle where it wasn’t a problem. People were literally gasping. LOLOL.  The theater was definitely a-twitter. Lol. [random aside that I saw Angels in America during this trip, and in that play Lee Pace gets naked and just walks around the stage in the buff, so I guess it was my week for seeing ass and penis on stage? Lol]

Then he gets out and puts on a towel and walks around in that for a while, which is nice. Then he goes into the bedroom and changes and you can see him in his undies briefly (lol pun) again. So anyway, THAT HAPPENS. Lol

While Matt is showering and getting ready, Michael’s phone rings. It’s his old college roommate, Alan (Brian Hutchison) who’s having a breakdown of some sort and wants to come over and talk to Michael. The problem? Alan is straight (or is he??) and “square” and doesn’t know that Michael is gay.  Which is a problem bc a bunch of gay men are about to descend on Michael’s apt. Michael tells him to quickly come over with the hope that he will arrive and leave before too many people show up (lol right).  But honestly, who’s listening to Michael at this point bc OMG MATT IS NAKED. Seriously, I think I just stared at Matt for 95% of the show regardless of who was talking. Lol. It helped that I read the play beforehand and watched the movie so I knew what was going on.  ;)

So Michael tells Donald that Alan is coming over and warns him that Alan doesn’t know he’s gay so don’t act gay. Donald is mildly offended and has a funny line about sitting with his legs spread and talking in a deep register. Lol. But anyway, Jim and Matt are great together and you can really see their friendship (well, Michael and Donald’s friendship). They’re very funny together. The doorbell rings and we all think it’s going to be Alan, but it’s the first of the party guests – Larry (Andrew Rannells), Hank (Tuc Watkins), and Emory (Robin de Jesus). Hank and Larry are a couple (with issues). Emory is unapologetically flamboyant. He is hilarious. So Hank was married (he’s in the process of getting divorced) and has 2 kids. He’s the most stereotypically masculine of the group. He’s bi, “with a definite  lean in one direction” (hint: not chicks). He’s a math teacher. The oldest of the group. He’s dating Larry, who’s a bit of a man-whore (and a commercial artist). Larry doesn’t believe in monogamy, and this makes Hank sad. So this is a running issue between the two throughout the night. Andrew is hilarious in the play. He has GREAT facial expressions and reactions.

So Michael introduces everyone and it’s a bit awkward between Larry and Donald. Clearly, they have some sort of history (spoiler alert that’s pretty obvious: They “know” each other because they fucked in the baths once, but never spoke to one another. Yes, they enjoyed their fuck). Throughout the night, Larry is continuously coming on to Donald. Leaning into his space, stroking his arm, etc. It’s pretty great.

Doorbell rings again. Michael warns everyone about Alan and to PLEASE ACT STRAIGHT. Cue lots of hilarity with Emory who is just not into pretending to be butch. So he opens the door...and it’s not Alan. It’s Bernard (Michael B. Washington). Bernard is black (relevant to later parts of the play). He works at the library (a bookstore? Can’t recall which now). Anyway, he knows Donald bc he’s always supplying Donald with books. Lots of comments on how Donald reads a shit-ton. Bernard is besties with Emory.

More hilarity and banter ensues. There is a song and dance number (Donald does not participate, but Matt looks cute standing there and he does cute mini hand/arm motions). While they’re all dancing and being silly, the doorbell rings, but no one hears it but Hank, who goes to open the door and...it’s Alan. So he walks in on all the guys doing a choreographed dance. AWKWARD. Michael is all...”Uh...we’re just being silly!” haha. Yeah. More introductions. Emory is Emory and is pissing Michael off with his refusal to stop being camp. Alan takes to Hank because he’s the most traditionally masculine. Hank and Alan talk about their kids and Larry is getting increasingly pissed bc Hank is hiding the fact that he’s gay and with Larry (although they’re all—poorly-- hiding the fact that they’re gay). Michael goes upstairs to speak with Alan and what his breakdown/problem is.

So the action shifts to upstairs, but we can still see everyone downstairs. So they’re all acting like they’re at the party and are fake talking, etc. This is when Larry really gets into Donald’s space. He’s pissed at Hank because Hank are Alan were being all chummy. So he’s taking it out on Hank by being extra flirty with Donald. Donald isn’t really..opposed?...to it, but he’s maybe a little confused and awkward about it bc...hello?!? Hank is here? What even...? lol.

So upstairs, Alan decides he doesn’t want to talk about his issue and instead talks about how attractive Hank is. Lol. He also likes Donald. Alan’s been downing drinks (Donald is kind of the unofficial drink maker) and he’s drunk. Then he gets all homophobic and says shitty things about Emory. Michael gets a little pissed and goes downstairs while Alan stays upstairs in the bathroom.

Downstairs, the doorbell rings. Michael answers it, expecting it to be Harold (the birthday boy who is clearly very late). It’s a young studly guy dressed as a cowboy (Charlie Carver) who sings Happy Birthday to Michael and kisses him. Oops! Wrong guy! Cowboy is Emory’s gift to Harold. Harold was supposed to answer the door. But cowboy is early (you’re supposed to show up at midnight bc you’re a midnight cowboy!) and Harold is late, so...yeah. Didn’t work out. Then Alan comes downstairs and thinks Cowboy is Harold. Emory says, “No, he’s FOR Harold.” Alan is increasingly hostile and Emory is done with the fucking charades. Emory makes a comment about Alan’s wife, and Alan goes fucking berserk and starts punching Emory while calling him a bunch of gay slurs. Alan is pulled off Emory who is bleeding. Chaos is breaking out. The doorbell rings. Donald answers it and in walks Harold (Zach).

Harold is quite the character. He used to be a professional ice skater. He describes himself as an “ugly, pockmarked Jew fairy”.  He’s high. He’s very sardonic. He looks around and it’s like...WTF is happening? Lol. Alan is passed out on the floor. Emory has blood all over his face. Cowboy sings happy birthday to Harold, kisses him, then Harold reads the card tied to him and starts laughing hysterically.  (this technically ends the first act in the play, but there’s no intermission or anything so the action keeps going)

[Note Larry leaning into Donald’s space in the background]

Bernard and Emory go upstairs to clean up. Up until this point, the play has been really really funny. The general tone is pretty light and humorous. At this point, the tone starts to change dramatically. At some point, I don’t remember exactly when, this change is made blatantly clear by the lights going dim, and all the action on stage freezes, aside from Michael. He heads to the bar and pours and downs a drink. Remember what Donald said about Michael when he’s drunk? MEAN. So this marks the turning point. Light go back up, action resumes. [I’m not sure what I think about them doing it this way, but it hammers the point home that Michael is now drinking and things are about to get dark, so eh. Whatever. ] Michael gets increasingly asshole-ish. You really start to hate Michael.

Alan declares he’s going to puke, so Hank leads him upstairs to the bathroom. Michael and Harold exchange barbs. You really start to wonder why they’re friends. Every time Michael takes a drink, Harold proclaims, “Turning!” Like Donald, he knows alcohol turns Michael into an asshole. Michael is getting drunker and meaner and Harold is not one to just put up with things.  If something gets dished out, he’ll deal it right back ten-fold. But while brutally honest, he’s not being as downright cruel as Michael, who even starts throwing racist remarks at Bernard and cruel comments to Emory (which really horrifies Donald).

Alan comes downstairs and proclaims his intention to leave, and bizarrely announces that Hank should leave with him. This leads to the announcement that Hank and Larry and lovers, and basically the charade is up and hey! We’re all gay; and btw, we think you are too, Alan. Michael won’t let anyone leave and invents a “party game” for them all to play. Basically, you have to call someone that you’ve truly loved. You get different amounts of points for various things – if someone answers, you say who you are, you get the person on the line that you want to speak with, you tell them you love them. A total of 10 possible points. Donald and Harold are immediately like, YEAH NO. Not playing. So Bernard and Emory both call people. Does not turn out particularly well. I literally cried for Bernard. Michael B. Washington does a phenomenal job.

Hank and Larry have it out again, but they end up calling each other, saying they love each other, and going upstairs to have sex in Michael’s bedroom.

Michael starts harassing Alan and telling him he should call their other college roommate, Justin, that Michael is convinced Alan was in love with. He’s in total asshole mode. Alan dials a number and ends up telling the person he loves them. Michael grabs the phone assuming it’s Justin..it’s not. It’s his wife.

Alan leaves. The mood of the party has degenerated into a total morose atmosphere. Harold just goes off on Michael with a huge truth bomb about how self-loathing Michael is and how badly he doesn’t want to be gay, but guess what? You’re gay and you’ll always be gay. He then takes off with Cowboy. Emory and Bernard (who is super drunk by this point) then leave, and Michael has a breakdown. He basically starts hyperventilating and is comforted by Donald. He pulls himself together and leaves to go to a midnight mass. Donald stays behind to read a bit, after assuring Michael that he’ll be back next weekend. The play ends with Donald reading and the silhouette of Hank and Larry making love upstairs in bed.

So yeah, I was much more brief when it came to the second half, in part bc it’s not as much “fun.” It’s much more dramatic. Very good, but not as fun to retell, and as far as Matt goes, aside from the end scene, he kind of disappears in the second half. I mean, he’s physically present and had lines, but there is definitely more focus on the other characters. He kinda just hangs in the periphery watching everything go down. And silently flirting with Larry lol.

All the characters do a stellar job. Charlie Carver/The Cowboy has the smallest role. He’s basically a big dummy, and provides some comic relief with his idiocy and innocence.  Tuc (Hank) does a great job, but his role isn’t as humorous or flashy as the others. Michael B. Washington is great as Bernard, and I was really feeling for him at the end. He has a great monologue that delves into race and slurs. He and Emory have a touching moment. Robin de Jesus is hilarious as Emory. Jim does a good job as insecure Michael. Apparently, he wears special shoes during the show because of his broken foot. I would not have known anything was wrong with his foot. He’s pretty spry walking around that stage. He does a good job playing a mean asshole. Lol. Andrew has hilarious reactions and facial expressions. Zach is hilarious as Harold. Very sarcastic and kind of deadpan? He has a very interesting way of speaking. Harold is super weird, and Zach does a super job. He comes in late in the play, but has an integral part once he arrives. And I love Donald. His role is definitely not as flashy as some of the others, but I feel you really get to know and like Donald.

You laugh A LOT during the first half of the show. You still have funny moments in the second half, but it is also more shocking and dramatic. Pretty thought provoking. And thinking about the time period that this play takes place in (1968) and how tough it was to be out (or not out) at that time, and looking on stage at the all gay cast...it’s a pretty special feeling. They look like they probably have a blast on stage every night.

I happened to be there on Zach’s actual birthday, which was funny because it’s his character’s birthday in the play. When Matt opens the door and it’s Zach standing there, the first line Donald says is, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Harold.” He said it VERY pointedly and I was like !!!!!!!! So that was special. Oh! A Matt insta post:

If you aren’t going to be able to see it, you can watch the original movie. Obviously, it’s not as cool as seeing your faves in the role, but the original play, movie, and the revival are all very faithful to each other. Same dialogue and everything. The movie does add a few scenes at the beginning outside of Michael’s apartment, and some of the movie takes place outside on a balcony instead of all inside, but those are very minor details. I think they cut out a few lines of dialogue in the revival so they could cut down on the time, but offhand I don’t recall what they cut out. I’ll have to read the play again. So you’ll hear all the stuff that happens and all the funny lines and stuff that they say in the play. Then you can envision Matt in the role of Donald. I like Matt’s portrayal of Donald better than the original actor’s, but OBVIOUSLY I am biased. lol

[thunderoad]

How did you find harry's show? I thought you'd go cause he was in huston but i wasnt sure? How did you find everything. I love your answers( specially the unfiltered and rambling ones)😘😘😘

haha plenty of rambling below!! (I don’t know how to do read mores on mobile rip I’m sorry y’all)

it was a very good show, but it didn’t seem to be centered on the songs, if you can abide that distinction? like, first things first, the Toyota center as a venue was RAD. the sound quality was terrific, the AC worked well (a big deal down here), and it was well-organized. those are super boring things to comment on but the venue having itself in order so helps to keep the crowd chilled, too, you know? our view was great, and I was seated next to this super funny little badass girl, so the space itself was awesome.

his stage setup was very, very cool! there’s that 180-degree screen that goes up and down over the main stage with really good image quality, and I think whoever was running the cameras had seen their fair share of mtv performance vids, because it was shot really well! the lighting rig was so cool I can’t get over it. it shifts throughout the show, but I thought the way it moved during ‘the chain’ was especially cool. it tends to look like the backdrop to a vintage dance tv show (think hairspray), which suited the podiums the band were stationed on. the graphics looked pretty great, too. the B stage was a really clever solution to the classic big-venue problem of distance, although it’s terrifying to see harry try and pass through that unscathed. production-wise, it was a really satisfying spectacle.

the band were good, too! i got the vibe mitch RLY did not want to be there, especially when he had to follow harry through the crowd to the B stage, but it’s hard to imagine why he’d have agreed to do it unless he wanted to; it made me wonder whether that dynamic was played up in order to emphasize harry as the circus ringleader and mitch as his dutiful sidekick. and when harry gets it right, he really does have a way with the crowd; it’s hard to look away from him. that said, his stage banter ('i have one job tonight: to do my very best to perform for you. you have one job tonight: to have the time of your life’) was entirely recycled from his austin '17 show (and possibly others? i don’t follow him closely enough to know), and edged from a little silly to almost impetuous the longer he went on. his banter doesn’t seem to have grown up from the 1d days, is all: he still listens hard for peoples’ names, sings happy birthday, and blows kisses to the crowd.

the girl i was sitting next to leaned over to me to wonder whether he was sick, too. he said he had 6 weeks of tour left, so maybe it’s fatigue, but he had a hard time getting out the last syllable of many of his lines, and he relied heavily on the crowd to sing for him on the more demanding parts. his band sang with him a lot, too. the bassist was the unsung hero of backup vocals, and his keyboardist was great on the high parts! vocally, the best parts of the show for me were the moments the whole band pitched in. the setlist was arranged in a nice order too, i thought.

like the rest of the production, the show itself runs like an incredibly well-oiled machine. unfortunately, it just doesn’t offer very much in the way of memorable emotional connection. the bants are recycled, and the music itself seems to have little in common with the audience except in that it alternates between castigating and desiring other young women. all that said, the crowd were incredible to watch. they stood for each of the false starts before the show actually got underway, organized and executed a cell light fan project, and sang along flawlessly every time they were prompted. harry’s 'you know what to do’ seemed to acknowledge that his fans are pretty highly dedicated and catch a lot of content online, which to me just emphasized the dissonance between their earnest time and dedication and his songs as not much more than a vehicle to travel the world, soak up applause, and sell merch. if he switched to easier-to-sing pop songs that skewed sound-wise to a younger demographic, then he’d make an excellent gateway for young fans to become regular concert-goers who genuinely make me excited to see more shows with them. till then, he’s got a foot in both worlds and doesn’t quite seem to be steady in either.

tl;dr: the trip itself was so fun i’m delighted i got to go, but i wouldn’t recommend paying more than $50 or so for a ticket. 6/10 or 3.0 stars out of 5 from me

[katesattic]

Sanders Sides: Voices

So I do still want to post that Analysis video of the latest Sanders Sides episode but I am way to sick to think about editing right now, so I’m back to my preferred medium: writing.

I really want to talk about the different voices Thomas employs for his various characters (the Sides being the most prominent and recurring ones) and I kind of just glossed over it in the video I made. I said something like it was cool, considerable attention to detail, and making the characters feel unique. But I want to take the time to go more in-depth with it. So here I am, writing this on my phone to be drafted and spell-checked later.

A Nod to the Shorts

First things first, this is not something exclusive to the Sides. Thomas has pretty much been doing this since his start on Vine. Whether it was an impression or a nametag character (e.g. Sleep or Brain), Thomas has been employing this technique in some fashion. You wouldn’t confuse Moon for Sleep because they have very different vocal habits as well as personalities.

In his impressions, he would obviously be trying to imitate a certain voice. And he would do his best to match it. His Stewie is spot-on as is his Brian (but to be fair his natural speaking voice is very similar to Seth MacFarlane’s natural speaking voice). But you can also spot changes in his voice for his original characters. The theatric nature of his voice is probably most prominent in series such as Narrating People’s Lives and when he takes on the role of a film or radio announcer in his shorts. Tone and inflexion are also a very important aspect of misleading compliments. The variation and the patterns present in Thomas’s voice are vast in his catalogue of videos, but I want to focus on the Sides.

an aside: I don’t know what it is about the way Thomas portrays Sleep, but he reminds me of the sassy gay bestfriend from a 90s sitcom. {And that might make me love the character of Sleep even more.}

My True Self

By this point, the three characters had already appeared in Thomas’s Vines. Yet the differences in their voices aren’t really present yet. As Thomas previously said, Roman’s voice had already been developed by this time thanks to his princely role in Into the Woods. Roman was also a very prolific character in Thomas’s vines, which allowed Thomas more time to perfect his voice.

Logan and Patton however, had very similar voices. Neither was truly unique or as iconic as their present voices. Logan’s voice is the most drastically different of the three Sides introduced in this video. Between the two of them Patton’s voice was closer to how it currently sound, I think the main difference is that it’s gotten even more bubbly and energetic as time has gone on. Logan’s voice, however, was very similar to both Thomas’s and Patton’s. It’s less stoic and sardonic than the voice we’ve come to associate with him. The most I can really say about Logan’s voice during this time is that it was plain and kind of forgettable.

Taking on Anxiety

Virgil came into the series with an already defined voice. Granted it was a bit more ... villainous (for lack of a better word) in his introduction. But even if the cadences of his voice weren’t exactly the way we expect to see them today, his voice was distinct because of his attitude. He’s the sass and snark master, and able to give as much as he takes from Roman. They have a frenemies/good cop, bad cop relationship with each other. Maybe that’s what gives them great chemistry (romantic or not).  Note the subtle changes in Virgil’s voice when he speaks to the other Sides though. He’s softer with the other two, especially Patton. Even with Patton, there’s a certain roughness, or grainy quality, to his voice that I just love.

Jumping forward to “Can Lying Be Good?” you can very clearly see the changes in both Virgil’s voice and attitude when he’s talking to Deceit versus Patton.  There is obvious hostility in his voice when addressing Deceit. Virgil's voice wasn't hostile towards Roman in his early episodes, sure, there was banter, but there was never out-right loathing. 

Moving back to “Moving On”, in part two especially, Virgil’s voice comes off as almost demonic. Whether that is a result of another Side corrupting him or a moment of pure anxiety overcoming Thomas, is not for this analysis to discuss but I am curious to know if we’ll ever hear more of this voice (by Virgil or another Side).

A New Year of Lying to Myself ... in Song

Can you believe this is only the fourth video in the Sanders Sides series? And Logan was absent from the previous two. So let me just say that by this point, all the voices have been cemented. Logan is back, and so is the voice we’ve come to love. Sure, he doesn’t speak much. I mean most of this video is spent in song, but we do see certain qualities in Logan’s voice to which we’ve become accustomed.

Also, hey, I think this is the first video with all four of the main Sides together, so that’s awesome.

Moving On

I’d like to take the time here to go more into detail about Patton’s voice. I’ve gone into details with the other three, so allow me to go more in-depth here. 

While Patton’s voice was cemented well before this video, this is the first episode where we see a different side to Patton. We see his other emotions, not just the silly and happy feelings, but the sad and longing ones. We see Patton pining for Thomas’s lost love, and unable to move on from the break-up. And along with this new sad Patton, we get a new sound to his voice. The moment that sticks out to me the most is the moment where he pleads with Logan to stop. The pain in his voice is so real and just thinking about it is making me tear up a bit. Conversely, Patton’s voice also becomes overly silly during these moments of duress. Also rewatching this episode, I realise that there’s a certain Roman Quality to Patton’s voice. The slightest hint of a quasi-British accent, particularly when Patton's giving deep and insightful advice.

This whole analysis is less about what the Sides are saying than how they are saying it. And I don’t think there could be a more obvious example than this two-part episode. In preparation for this analysis I’ve been listening to the videos - not watching them - but listening to them. And just from listening, you can hear th hesitation in Patton’s voice when the time comes to enter his room.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is, that all you need is the audio and you can instantly differentiate the characters without even seeing their faces.

Can Lying Be Good?

No, no it cannot, but a new character with an amazingly distinct voice is. Deceit’s voice is incredible! Absolutely chilling! And I love it so much. I remember when ”Patton’s” voice changed, the first time I watched, when Deceit was revealed, I genuinely thought that it was being dubbed over the other character. Seriously, I just assumed one actor dubbed over the voice of another (similar to how Thomas dubs his voice over Joan’s while Roman has shapeshifted into Joan). It throws me every time I watch it. I assume it’s someone else’s voice rather than Thomas’s.

Additionally, when Deceit is disguised as Patton before he reveals himself, you can tell Patton’s voice is ... off. The first time you watch the episode, you can’t seem to tell what exactly is off about Patton. His voice is a strange mix between Patton’s eccentric vocal habits and Thomas’s natural speaking voice. I can’t be sure if this was a subconsious thing or a deliberate change Thomas made but it’s nuance is nothing shy of perfection.

The suspension of disbelief is so strong when it comes to the Sides that I genuinely forget that all these characters are being portrayed by the same gay (this was a typo, but I’m keeping it). And not only are all these characters, being portrayed by the same guy, they are also voiced by that same guy as well.

Sides Aside

Seriously, Sides aside, I love Thomas’s voice and headphones truly enhance all the minor features present within it. So here we go ...

THIS MAN IS A SIREN. You don’t have to experience sexual or romantic attraction to men to know that this man sings the siren’s song. I don't know how to adequately explain Thomas's voice. It's magic? It’s soft and low? There’s a gentle yet grainy element to his voice. I’m trying to come up with terms outside the scope of someone who’s interested in linguistics and phonology. And am really struggling to express how his voice sounds. Like, there’s something so comforting and soothing about his speaking voice, and his singing voice amplifies that tenfold.

OK, so I have this playlist of two songs ("The Things We USed to Share" and his cover of "Snow in Venice") which I just play on repeat the entire night ... what I'm trying to say is: I'm biased. My default to describing his voice is magical and comforting. I'm very fond of bass and baritone singers, and I absolutely love when they hit the low notes so  ... I'm biased. 

I guess the whole point of this analysis is for me to just talk in length about how amazingly talented this dude is.  He has an incredible vocal range, in both the acting and singing departments. His characters are distinct, in voice and personality and his humour is never lost, no matter how serious the topic. Long story short, this g(a/u)y's amazing, and I'm a fucking fangirl.

[warmau]

{Special} College!AU Jae

major: communications - rhetoric concentration 

minor: philosophy (not going well for him)

sports: n/a

clubs: debate team, writes for the art journal, in a couple of on-campus bands but is mostly active with a group called night6

“bro, why aren’t you a music major?”

“easy. i love getting into arguments with people.”

so a lot of people don’t know much about tall, lanky, otherwise unthreatening looking jae

and that’s the fact that he can run his mouth a mile a minute, and quite frankly, he loves doing that

got called out on twitter for abusing the 280 character limit 

by called out i mean youngk started a poll to get jae blocked by twitter - it didn’t work but it was hilarious 

asked his friend jamie once “hey, if i send in my grades - will they verify me on instagram?”

she wasn’t amused

he originally thought taking philosophy would just mean more time to debate others, but socrates ??? what was that dude even saying??? why are all his words so Complicated

like jae is all for that know thyself but damn,,,,,

he wants to go into law after school,,,,or more specifically public policy and stuff. he might act silly and make sarcastic jokes the core of his personality - but jae cares about things

he cares about people and the world deeply, enough that he’s agitated by unjustice

even if he’s gotten excused from “discourses on colonialism” like five times for cursing out christopher columbus 

he loves music a lot, probably has the most diverse taste in it though - so people are always asking him for reccommendations 

knows like,,,,,every local band playing in bars near campus,,,

night6 is a small band gotten together by jae and his closes friends, their unofficial manager is jamie who always puts up a fuss about them not playing venues worth their talent

but tbh jae loves it, the stage

small or big, playing guitar or arguing over texts - he just likes the spotlight

even if his rather shy, nerdy apperance says otherwise

he probably owns like one hundred of the same pair of wide-framed glasses because he thinks they make him look the best

also once he worse dark ones and wonpil was like “you look like a blind mouse”

always chilling outside of class, guitar case slung over his shoulder and notebook in hand, listening to some indie album no one has ever heard of

has messy hair, but a super clean dorm (sungjin really doesn’t know why his dorm is the only thing jae keeps organized in his life)

and you’ve actually known jae for a while, since middle school actually,,,

in high school you two even briefly dated, after years of friendship it had all come to a point where you’d kissed at some after party dance

and you and jae were sure you were soulmates, both music obsessed and enjoying good banter

but,,,,,,,,,it didn’t last long,,,,,,,,,because well because you ended it

there had been too much going on, too many uncertain futures and jae had still been a teenager - unaware that his jokes had a time and a place

and when you were in peril, you didn’t want his sarcastic commentary,,,,you wanted the jae behind that

the jae that had held you in his arms like you were the most treasured source of light in his life and if he were to let go  he’d be shrouded in darkness forever

but he hadn’t been that,,,and you didn’t know if he still had it in him

you guys didn’t talk much after, you didn’t know he even ended up at the same college as you until you see him talking with a jamie outside of debate club

and you wouldn’t have gone over, if it hadn’t have been for jamie spotting you and waving you over

she held your arm excitedly, asking if you know jae and if you can still make it to the concert she’d invited you tonight

all too quick did it dawn that this was jae’s concert,,,, 

“im happy you still play guitar.”

you whispered and jamie’s excitement buzzed between the weird atmosphere of you and jae

he smiled, but it was half-hearted

“im happy you’re doing well.”

the concert was,,,,just as you expected - in a dark, dingy bar full of drunk undergrads

jae’s band was playing, and you could vaguely recognize youngk who also went to high school with you two

the setlist was a whole bunch of songs you’d never head before - and you couldn’t believe that you felt your heart twist when you couldn’t even recognize one

a memory of you and jae, sitting in his garage when you were just sixteen played like an old film in your head

he had been a tiny bit shorter than he was now, and his handsome sharp features were awkward

but you had felt nothing short of true, pure love back then

because jae was sharing his songs with you, reaching out to take your hand and help you play chords 

laughing sweetly against your ear and making everything else float away

he had been close, so so close

but now, you were at the other end of the room and he was playing something unfamiliar and his eyes hadn’t met yours the entire night,,

clutching your untouched beer once more, you pushed it away and made your way to jamie who stood at the edge of the stage recording the performance

“just got a text from my RA, im gonna go ok?”

she nodded, turning to smile and mouth a goodbye

as you turned, your back to the stage as you fought through the people to the exit

jae’s eyes flicked from his mic to the shadow of your figure

i won’t miss them. ive missed them for far too long

he thought, but somehow he knew he was lying to himself. like he’d lied to himself when you broke up with him.

after that, you and jae kept your distances

jamie had tried to invite you to more of night6′s shows - but you made up excuses

she probed and jae to tell her how you two knew each other, but he always answered in one word or two

“school” “same neighborhood” “don’t remember” 

but he did - he remembered everything, even the things that hurt the most 

how you weren’t a,,,,,,sun kind of person,,,,you were more like the moon - gentle, but unforgettable 

you were the first person to tell jae he didn’t have to be whatever other people wanted him to be

you were the first person he really,,,,kissed,,,,really touched

there was so much about you - small facts and habits that he knew that suddenly flooded back in waves after seeing you at his concenrt

that he couldn’t sleep for hours,,,,,laid in bed and stared into the dark, listening to youngk’s small snores and stirs and thought

about the color of your eyes, the slope of your neck, your words - “jae, you weren’t there for me. i needed you and you just - you just -”

both you and jae know that staying away is the only thing that can keep you two on track, and the university is a big place it isn’t that hard to avoid crossing paths

but fate is mysterious and sometimes you can’t control where two people end up

it’s late when you leave the bookstore - you’re supposed to take your bike back to campus but ,,,,,,,, it’s gone

you stare at the pole you attached it to, but,,,,,,,it’s not there

the only thing remaining is the broken lock laying helplessly on the ground and as you squat down to pick it up

you try to reason with yourself - so what if it got stolen,,,,it was old,,,,,

but biting back your lip, you clutch the lock in hand and think that there must be a bus nearby,,,,a metro station? 

“stolen bike? tough luck!”

a voice says from behind you

“people are really dropping to new lows these days, like dude just go get a used bike they’re like thirty bucks.”

the voice is familiar and you want to tell yourself that no, there’s no way

but when you turn, jae is there and his look of amusement washes into something between shock and regret

“oh,,,,hey.”

you swallow, hiding the lock completely in your hand and trying to tell yourself to just act normal - like you guys are just clasmates - not friends, but not strangers

“hey, it,,,it’s funny right.”

you mean the bike, but jae’s tone of humor is gone. his eyes fixate on your hand and you see them do a small twitch, a habit he’s had since you knew him

“im,,,,about to drive back to campus. do you want a ride?”

of all the things in world you shouldn’t agree to, a one-on-one late night drive with your ex has to be up there

but you’re,,,,not in the mood to wander around looking for your stolen bike or any other way to get back to school

plus saying no,,,,would just seem like you were making things weird and you didn’t want to make things weird

so forcing the best smile you can you nod, “tha-that’d be great, but i hope it’s not a bother.”

jae shakes his head, the unkept bangs fall over his glasses and when he turns you take in the lines of his jaw and nose

since you’ve last seen him, he’s grown

and you were always charmed by his physical appearance, but now he wasn’t just cute - he was truly an adult 

with big shoulders and prominent angles that made something stir within you

something you pleaded with to calm down - to not cloud your better judgment 

jae’s car was familiar, it had belonged to his father when you were in high school and jae had stolen it once to drive you two to the city once,,,

you’d never made it - turning around halfway there because the sun was rising and instead stopping off the road to watch it 

he had held your hand back then, brought it up to his lips and kissed it 

he’d gotten grounded when he drove back, coming into school laughing about it at your locker

now, you were sitting beside him in the passenger seat and it was silent - pitch black outside aside from the flickering of stop lights and buildings

and you could hear your breathing, the beating of your heart and how it got just a bit faster when jae put his hand on the headrest of your seat while backing up out of the parking space

neither of you spoke, he didn’t even play music which was odd

it was horrible - suffocating

until finally you had had enough and leaned forward to press play on the car radio

“don’t-” jae began, but it was too late

the CD inside started playing - the sound of jae’s young voice speaking your name

“-this is a playlist just for you. it has all our songs on it, the one we kissed to and all the corny good stuff. the first one’s the one i wrote for you. don’t laugh at it, ok? you better not laugh.”

jae stopped it before the song could play, but you already knew what it was 

this was the playlist jae had made for you after you guys started dating. you’d given the CD back when you broke up,,,but why was he listening to it now?

you wanted to ask, but something kept you from it

“im sorry. this is awkward.” you whisper

“are you sorry that this situation is awkward or are you saying apologizing is awkward?”

you grimace at that, there he goes - always politicking always,,,saying what you wish he wouldn’t

jae seems to feel you tense and sighs

“sorry,,,,sorry,,,,i still haven’t learned to watch my mouth. but,,,,im sorry too. i wish,,,,,,,,we didn’t have to be like this.”

there’s pain in his voice and it almost breaks you - but you understand what he means

sitting back against the seat, you turn to face the window just because you don’t know what to say

you’re so scared of this fragile line you and jae are walking

because every moment with him feels like you’re re-living those good memories from before

but you’re also thinking about the moment you chose to abandon all that

jae doesn’t bother you, he seems to be in the same limbo of feelings too the whole drive back

but what’s weird is that when you pull into the parking lot, you both sit there in the car - not sure who should move first

“part of me regrets it.”

you breath and clench your teeth as you speak

jae’s eyes stay on the dashboard

“part of me regrets breaking up with you, because i did it so trivially - i just snapped under pressure and thought that you couldn’t give me what i wanted and jae -”

you feel his gaze finally settle on you

and his eyes aren’t those of the teenage boy you were in love with, they’re of someone matured and ready to be serious

“jae everything back then was so ,,,, fucked.”

you don’t even realize it, maybe because it’s the earth’s magnetic force or your own instincts as people, but you and jae are coming closer

till his strong hands have you in a hug, uncomfortable because of your positions in the car, but so inviting and warm

protective ,,,,, the kind of hug you needed back then but also the kind of hug you craved for even now

“i was still a kid, i didn’t know what to do. but ive grown, and i can be there now.”

his voice sounds deeper, closer against the shell of your ear and your grip on him tightens 

“have you been remembering ,,,,,, us?” you as with a shiver down your spine as jae nuzzles his face into your neck

“yes. i remember,,,,,,everything.”

that night, neither of you can go back to your dorms

you and jae walk the campus, still and untouched in the night and hold hands

you feel his long fingers entwine with yours and it’s embarrassing the thought that runs through your head

you’ve only just,,,,gotten close again - you can’t rush

and when you and jae talk,,,,,because years have passed and you’re not lost teens with too much adrenaline and misconceptions about the world you realize you’re both in places where,,,,,,,having each other

it would be nice. really nice

you fall asleep against his shoulder in the backseat of his car, his hoodie that he shrugs off is your blanket and nothing really happens but physical closeness and content

that your past is put to rest,,,,and you could find each other again

when you wake up, jae says he’s late for his class but he didn’t want to move and wake you

you poke him playfully, tell him that was dumb but jae just smiles and gropes around for his glasses on the car floor

he walks you to your dorm, and tells you to keep the hoodie

you walk a little bit up the stairs, just two or three before you’re at a height where you can lean over and kiss his forehead

and its,,,,,,,,,childish,,,,,giddiness that fills you two up even though you’re not kids anymore

the word dating doesn’t really come up till a couple of weeks after that, when jamie runs into you and jae at the cafe - jae is mocking one of the philosophers he has to read for class and you’ve got your legs thrown over his 

“sooooo you’re a couple now? honestly, you’re too good for jae!”

jamie comments, throwing an arm around you as she plops down at the table

she steals some of your coffee and jae rolls his eyes at her - asks her to let go of you, his significant other

and jamie just huffs, because she had you first

it’s a joke between friends, but you do have to put an end to it before someone gets some kind of food chucked at them

when jamie hops off to join kevin for studying, you look over at jae and smile

“so, it’s official - we gotta im your’s, you’re mine kinda thing?”

he grins, cheesy and the like and kisses your lips

“yep, better tell youngk to give up on that longtime crush he’s been having”

“oh hush, he doesn’t like me”

jae shakes his head, “i meant the one he’s had on me, obviously since im taken now.”

and don’t get me wrong, jae is still the sarcastic lil shit he’s always been - with a humor that borderlines annoying but that is still loveable

because he’s learned to scale it back, and he’s learned how to be a shoulder for you to lean on

just like you’re always ready to be there for him

whether it be supporting him at local band shows, wiping sweat off his face after a long set 

to helping him stay up and finish his philosophy papers - wikipedia articles and all

“those glasses make you look like a bug my dude”

youngk snarks one afternoon as you’re all eating lunch and jae untangles his arms from your waist to flick his best friend on the forehead

“hey, he’s a cute bug youngk - don’t be jealous”

you chime in, taking a bite of your food and lifting the chopsticks up again to feed jae

youngk makes a hacking noise at the affection, but both and jae stick your tongues out at him

you’re always surprised by the minimalism of jae’s dorm, just his bed, his desk, and his guitar 

even youngk has more than him, and you insist he decorate - give it some flavor

so jae hangs up a photo of you guys with tape and is like “i put up the most important photo i could find!”

you blush, but then you’re like “no, no we need one more.”

he tilts his head and you go “your mom. get a photo of her up there too you dweeb”

he  claps his hands together and goes “you’re totally right!”

sometimes he’ll call you petnames in korean and you’re like,,,tell me what it means or im bringing back the infamous chicken little jokes LOL

he’s so tall, that all his clothing has to be a size too large so it’ll be long enough

but this is great for you, endless baggy shirts and sweaters and flannels

and sweater paws that make jae fawn over you - or pout and go “give that back, i was gonna wear it to class!”

you and jamie are the first proud owners of night6 t-shirts

sungjin sometimes asks you if jae,,,,is like,,,,just like that 

and you’re like ?? what do you mean

and sungjin is like - is he just you know,,,,,,always talking

you: no there’s an off button, wanna see?

sungjin: please show me go

you: ok, here goes

and all you have to do is tap jae’s shoulder and wag with your finger for him to lean down

you kiss him, all cute and soft - leaving jae in a happy daze while throwing the peace sign up at sungjin who looks equally shocked and equally disappointed 

there’s a week where youngk goes away on a research trip with his fellow majors

and you and jae literally just turn the dorm into your own little apartment for the whole time, you never leave and you guys eat on youngk’s bed to avoid crumbs in jae’s

watching youtube video together, listening to jae write and practice, joking about how you guys have to wait past midnight to shower together 

it’s a week of just,,,,being domestic - and honestly you could get used to it,,,,

the last night you have “youngk free” as jae calls it, you’re laying beside jae and his hair is still slightly wet from his shower

he’s playing some game on his phone, arm still wrapped around you when you get that feeling in your stomach

and sit up, carefully removing the photographt of jae’s mother from his wall and placing it face down on his desk

“what’s up-”

he starts, but you throw a leg over his thighs and straddle his waist

jae’s eyes turn wide, and then haze over when you pull off his glasses and chuck his phone onto youngk’s bed

leaning in, jae taste faintly of mint and his large hand splays over your lower back 

you two fit together - and it’s like the temperature in the room climbs up ten degrees

jae sits up, you slide into his lap easily and there’s kissing, small sounds, and a lot of his hands everywhere

his body isn’t too muscular, it’s long and lean and he has the right amount of strength to support whatever you have for him 

and everything is close to perfect, but the small bumps of your noses and apologizes about marks left on necks just add to the overall naturality of being with him

“im blessed, im so blessed to have you”

is said somewhere afterwords, in the fall of bliss

and your heavy eyelids are kissed as you two fall asleep

youngk gets back early, and isn’t surprised to see you in the dorm collecting your things and taping the photo of jae’s mother back on the wall

you wave goodbye and when jae looks at youngk he grins “how was your trip?”

“just tell me you guys didnt’,,,,,not in my bed right?”

jae is not poetic when he talks, but he has a talent with lyrics and wonpil is sure some of his softer, more romantic ones are about you

jae refuses to acknowledge this, but the moment you’re around - sitting on his lap and playing with his hair or just giving him a kiss on the neck 

wonpil is sure what’s written on jae’s face is pure adoration 

you and jae debate on everything in a joking, couple kind of way but you do get competitive over some things

like which song is better or whose better at pokemon

and everyone thinks your twitter rants about each other are hilarious

you and jae can’t stay mad at each other for too long though - you both miss kissing each other more

jae is never amused at you asking him to get things off the top shelves in the libarary

but then again, you’re so freaking cute he does it anyway

“you’re mi amor”

“is that all the spanish you know?”

“i was born in argentina, but i didn’t really live there for too long - don’t sass me”

you and jae are voted cutest couple by the journal he sometimes writes for and youngk is like the votes are rigged but they’re not yall just too sweet to handle 

more college aus can be found:

by group: bangtan | vixx | got7 | nct | kard | monsta x | seventeen  gg specials: amber | momo | irene 

[guardmesherlock-rowan]

[SWD GMS] Mycroft x Reader (on celebrating his birthday)

by @3r1n4u2nv

Morning rests easily across the skies as soon your eyes fluttered, signaling your wakefulness and rise from your slumber. The bright morning sunshine peeking through the gaps of the window curtains, showering you with a bright halo and glow that seeps through your skin. A warm sunny embrace resemblant to that warmth you were basking in within the arms of your darling man. Watching his peaceful and innocent slumbering face, his boyish features apparent during this state, you couldn't​ help but smile while you let the soft caress from your palm and fingers brush away the stray locks of cocoa brown hair resting on his cheek, making him wince a little from the ticklish sensation your touch entailed.

  “Hmm….” Shuffling over and closer as he reels you into a tight loving embrace, his sleepy eyes still hesitant to open, you couldn’t help a chuckle from escaping your lips as you inch in to snuggle even closer it on the blanket of warmth holding you.

  “Happy birthday, Mycroft.” Resting your cheek upon his chest, you greet him softly and let your breath tickle his heart, leaving him sighing in awe. A giggle arose from you as you struggled to meet him face to face, dawning a sweet butterfly like kiss on his cheek as you greet him again in a song, “Happy Birthday to you~ Happy Birthday to you​~ Happy Birthday Dear Mycroft~ Happy Birthday to you~”

  As he remained quiet and holding you in his arms while you sang him a birthday song with such a sweet voice, his soft smile never left from the moment you wished him till you had finished your song. His heart danced in joy as he listened to the voice he loved so much, wanting to hear it every single day from the moment he wakes up, to the moment before sleep creeps in. He loved it so much that even when you two make love at times, he would be greedy for your voice to utter his name lovingly. This was one of the joys he held dearly in his heart.

  Finally letting his eyes meet yours, glazed with love and gratitude,  he places a lingering kiss upon your lips before planting a soft kiss on your forehead whispering, “Thank you, my love. It is indeed great pleasure to wake up this morning with you in my arms.” And it always has. Once again, he claims your lips before pressing your head soft against his chest, his heart fluttering happily, its beat was beautiful music to your ears. For a while, you both remained all snuggled up and wrapping each other in a longing​ embrace, neither of you ready to release the other to rise from bed.

  __________________________________________

  The moment you both decided to rise from bed was when the sun was already high above your heads, glaring so brightly in the skies and bathing the entire place with wonder and light. It was already noontime then.

  And while the sun reigned in glory above the skies, Mycroft was claiming reign in the kitchen himself, dead set to impress you with his culinary skills and mastery, (and you do admit his skills of handling and creating a gorgeous looking dish was superb beyond yours but still…), and you stood alongside him to be his audience and as his little helper, making sure his hard work in making the feast he planned will all be done smoothly without  any hassle (and to make sure not just appearance alone will be made remarkable and presentable but also the taste which you indirectly try to improve while making light suggestions, which he happily heeds.)

  His smile and humming never left him all the while you two worked inside the kitchen,  making feastful cuisines together, and the feeling was entirely mutual. You loved doing something with him no matter what it was for you both simply enjoy spending time together in any way possible. It was an added bonus that you and  Mycroft​ were given a day off on his special day, wanting to celebrate it doing what you both love. Initially, you suggested having dinner in a fine restaurant together and simply bake a cake for him which you will present as a surprise for him by then, but as much as he was a man who loved convenience, he wanted to try something new this year and make it memorable with you as you celebrate it together. That was where the idea of him making the feast with his bare hands arose and seeing excitement flickering in his eye, you thought it wouldn’t be so bad cooking together to prepare his birthday feast. In fact, you knew it was going to be fun just simply being with him.

  A whole of the entire afternoon was spent together inside the kitchen, preparing the birthday dinner and you have already finished baking his red velvet birthday cake and mini chocolate muffins knowing his love for sweets knows no bounds. You decorate the little pastries with strawberry frosting and heart shaped dark and white chocolate bits. The red velvet cake may have seem to appear simpler than a cakeshop’s, Mycroft was ever so delighted that his beloved lady made this cake for him and was made with pure love for him. As he boyishly marveled as his birthday cake, you eventually felt shy yet giggle at his childlike glee. And while dinner was all set and done, a chime rang out from the entrance of your home, both of you expecting a few guests coming over to celebrate his birthday together.

  (And while he did intend to invite guests to celebrate this very occasion, know he has already planned a private celebration for just the two of you later once night arises.)

  __________________________________________

  The humble guests arrived on time and it was indeed a delight to see them!  Mikah, John, Hercule, and Sherlock: four of the most closest friends to both you and your man. Once they stepped inside,Mikah, John, and Hercule wished the birthday boy with smiles and cheer; while when it came to Sherlock’s turn another of their back and forth antics came to life, making you sigh and chuckle at their silly sense of expressing affection.

  Dinner was soon served and alarm painted across the faces of the four individuals, dreading to ask who prepared the feast. It only gotten worse the moment you announced Mycroft was the one who prepared it, it immediately sent chills to their spine.

  “But I couldn’t take all the credit to myself, now can I? My beloved wife right here next to me assisted me with such grace and wisdom that I was so inspired through our culinary journey inside our little kitchen.” As he commented so, he wasted no time to scoop your hand and deliver it to his lips, pressing a kiss on the back of its palm, of course with the hidden intention of showing off to the guys which left you flushed and flustered.

  “Ah… there he goes again showing off.” Hercule voices, a wry smile on his face.

  “I bet he only invited us to rub to our faces how he’s happily married.” John soon follows up with his own, sighing as he shook his head.

  “Why shouldn’t he? It’s actually nice to see them both so happy, don’t you think Sherlock?” Mikah, the only teenage lad among the group of guests, also chimes in and soon handing the baton to Sherlock, waiting for his epic response.

  “…” But as he remained quiet and squinting in disgust over his brother, Mycroft couldn’t help letting an amused smile as he simply watched the transition of expression across his baby brother’s face.

  “Aww, Sherly, do you want a kiss from big brother too?” Mycroft teases, leaving a scowl on Sherlock’s face.

  “My name is Sherlock, not Sherly! And I have no brother! Who would even want that from you?!” Sherlock bolts up to his feet as he spats it all out and as the end question was done, all three guests point their eyes on you with a knowing smile, leaving you even more flustered and abashed.

  “Obviously, Y/N would!” Mikah chimes with a hearty chuckle, while John and Hercule both not in agreement. Their reactions  made you blush hard but you also felt happy that they are giving support to you and Mycroft in their own ways.

  Throughout mealtime, though hesitant at first, knowing you also helped in preparation for this feast before them, everyone soon enjoyed the small dinner party with chatter and light conversations in between. Of course, the usual banter between brothers was there, but everyone knew it was their reversed way of showing affection somehow. The entire feast was enjoyable with laughter and cheer to celebrate the day of Mycroft Holmes coming into the world.

Dessert was up and it was now time to cut the cake, but funny enough, the birthday boy only allowed the chocolate cupcakes to be served and eaten, and as bewildered as you were, you wanted to ask him why he didn’t let the red velvet cake be served for dessert, but somehow in your heart, you had a little hunch to why, thinking he would solely want the entire cake for himself (which he would be too delighted to dish out in a mere few minutes). You weren’t sure if he did want it for himself or that the said cake was not to his liking, leaving you somewhat sad at the very thought of it.

  __________________________________________

  The moment everyone of your guests​ left for home an hour before midnight, you were still stuck there wondering why your red velvet cake was the only birthday feast treat left untouched, worry clouding your face, and your heart feeling a prickle of pain.

  “Y/N.” His voice soon snaps you from your ponder, concern evident on him. “Are you alright? You were so quiet after dessert was served that I worried maybe something happened.”

  And well, something did happen to cross your mind while he asked and conveyed his concern, and this allowed you to voice yours as well.

  Taking a few breaths to prepare yourself, soon your lips opened as the question left you, “I was just wondering… Why didn’t you served your birthday cake and shared it with everyone?” You tried hard to maintain eye contact as you inquired about this thought, wanting to know whether either of your previous assumptions was correct. “Umm... Didn’t you… like it?” The very question alone left a bitter taste in your throat, making your heart pound agonizingly.

  For a moment, he simply stares back at you in sheer silence, his eyes searching for yours before he cracked a charming smile and pinched the tip of your nose, a chuckle leaving him.

  “What an adorable silly wife I have. Of course I love it! I love every little thing you do and all that you do, so of course I love that birthday cake too!” Hearing him excitedly admit it, he immediately wraps his arms around you as you both stood beneath the blanket of stars and the radiance of the moon in its fullest form. Then he continues—

  “The reason why I didn’t serve the red velvet one was because it was the most special one that sat on table this evening. Even though I’d like to share with everyone normally, there are times that I also want something all for myself without the marvel of others and today happens to be that day. And because it was the very first birthday cake my beautiful wife made for me with her tender love and care, it didn’t sit with me to go and share it and I also honestly wanted to be selfish and have it with you alone instead, just the two of us having it over tea. What say you, love?”

  Hearing the entirety of his logic made your heart sang with love and joy for you know his very own is also doing the same as if they are dancing together in a lovely waltz. It was this very sweet and endearing side of him that leaves you breathless and in awe, realizing all over again what you love about this man named Mycroft Holmes. And you are happy to indulge in his invitation, you smiled and kissed his lips before parting and nodding to his offer.  Hand in hand you both stride back inside the warmth of your home and have that cake and tea time with him, thinking of it as your own little private birthday date.

  _____________________________________________

•°•>The End<•°•

_____________________________________________

Here it goes :D I’m not sure if I got him right so I must apologize for that beforehand OTL

Thank you so much for your encouragement that has turned into this little piece right here~ <3

This is a fanfiction submission by @3r1n4u2nv for Mycroft’s Birthday (as well as their own!!! Happy birthday 3r1n4u2nv!)

It was so sweet!  And I adored all their little interactions! The relationship between Y/N and Mycroft was so tender and loving!  

Thank you so much for your submission!  I hope your birthday is/was a happy one!

[ackackh]

HBO War YouTuber Headcanons

(SO MUCH MORE under the cut)

BAND OF BROTHERS

George Luz George has a review channel He sits at his computer at his desk where his camera is set up A lot of the time, you can see his (big ass) mic in the shot. He doesn’t care. He’s almost always wearing headphones. Either apple-type earbuds with the cord under his shirt, or giant headphones, one covering an ear, one tucked behind his other ear. He’s really onto hi-fi audio tech, it’s where most of his spending money goes. He reviews music, tv shows, movies, books, video games. Anything popular and anything he likes. 

The reviews are always fair and he tends to review things he likes anyway so there aren’t a lot of negative vibes on his channel. He also does some reaction videos. When he’s feeling up to it, he’ll make fun of Trump (and when he does it’s hilarious) but the boy has his limits. He wants his channel to be a reprieve for himself and for others. He has a lot of followers and they all just fawn over him because George has such an animated face and he gets so excited about things he likes. It’s adorable. Too pure. He also produces some original music! It’s mostly beats and he has a SoundCloud and a Patreon. He uses Snapchat and Vine a lot, in tandem with his channel. What’s on his snapchat/vine you ask? Every. Impression. Ever. And George is really good at them! They’re funny and accurate and his viewers really like them! He also has a million videos of him bugging his friends (mostly on vine). His favorite stunt is to see how long he can film Joe without him noticing. Spoiler: it’s not very long. Most of his vines end with him running away from an irritated Joe or with Joe smacking the phone out of his hand. The phone falls to the ground and you can hear George whine “What’d you hafta do that for?” He loves to do Special Guest Episodes! Sometimes the guest is Perco, sometimes it’s Skip, or Don, or even Carwood. He’s a good friend and if they have a channel he’ll plug for them. BUT he gets the most requests for Special Guest Episodes with Joe Toye! Joe will pull up his own desk chair beside Luz and reviews things with him (George will pick things Joe is actually interested in for the video). Joe has a harder time remembering that there's a camera and a mic to perform towards, and he’s quieter than Luz, but he gives his honest opinions which are always well thought out. Plus the viewers dig his voice. People will comment or email Luz, saying how much they love their banter, their chemistry. How they love how earnest Joe is (he’s a naturally charming guy!) Sometimes they get carried away with the “light” flirting, always smiling and always completely focused on what the other has to say. Joe doesn’t always stay for the whole video because he has shit to do, ya know? So he’ll get up and kiss George’s head or squeeze his shoulder and say “later, Georgie” And George will look at the camera and and yell to him “I LOVE YOU, JOE” and you can faintly hear Joe somewhere else in the house say, “love you, too, idiot!” And George giggles and gives the camera a wink.

Carwood Lipton Carwood keeps a video diary! He just films wherever he feels is right. Sometimes the family room, sometimes the office, sometimes the bedroom. The vibe is really chill, relaxed. You can almost think of Michael Aranda’s What I’m Doing Right Now He has a modest following, but he’s really interactive with the community: frequently answering questions, participating in conversations and debates. His vlog is multimedia! He uses twitter and snapchat a lot too, sometimes incorporating them into his videos. He loves to take candid videos and pictures of himself and his friends, with or without their immediate knowledge. (He always gets their permission before he posts anything) Viewers will often times find his video for that day is a mash up of videos of time spent with friends, Ron, Harry, Kitty, Dick, and Lew, on some small adventure. There’s some pleasant, energetic music playing, spliced with audio of the original video when someone says something particularly interesting or funny. His videos are for his followers, but he also keeps in mind that some of his family watches too, so everything is pretty PG. Ron isn’t super interested in YouTube, but he like’s to watch Carwood’s videos. He lives with the guy, and he always sees the bits and pieces as Carwood puts it together, so he likes to see the finished product. Sometimes he’ll come sit and be in a video, just for a little while if Carwood asks him. And of course they’re super in love, and Ron is so taken with Carwood, that the community comments like, “WE LOVE RON, GIVE US MORE RON PLS.” Ron will sometimes sit down with Carwood and answer questions. Either from the viewers or from a top googled list. It becomes a segment, titled something like Everyday Answers with Ron. And people love it because Ron can’t be anything but himself and he’s so oddly charming and adorable with how straightforward he is. he doesn’t quite understand why people like him so much. Carwood’s most viewed and most liked video is the one of the day Ron proposed. Harry, Kitty, and Nix were all in on it and got the whole thing on video and made sure they got footage of the celebrations afterward. He recorded in their bedroom that night, all sleepy and lovey with Ron, who kisses his cheek and thumbs over the band on Carwood’s finger.

Kitty Grogan Welsh Kitty’s channel is full of really fun things! Like stories, adventures in things like baking or hand crafts, personal make up tutorials. And, maybe most surprisingly, video games. So, she doesn’t do the average let’s plays. She’s not actually interested in showing people the game. Instead, she picks a topic, often sent in by fans, and shares her thoughts and ideas on this topic while she plays whatever games she likes. She plays games like, FIFA, Madden, Overwatch, and random platformers. These are her most watched videos. Maybe about once a month she has Husband Episodes where Harry sits and plays with her or watches her play while they discuss whatever topic they’ve decided on. He’s adorable and she spends a good amount of the time teasing him. Upon many, many requests, she has posted both a “My Husband Does My Makeup” video and an “I Do My Husband’s Makeup” video. I can’t reiterate enough how adorable Harry is here.

Joe Liebgott and David Webster Joe and Web don’t share a channel. Because that would be a disaster. But here’s how they know each other: That Prick YouTuber Whose Opinions Are Wrong Joe’s channel is mostly about music. He reviews artists, albums, and singles. AND he records original pieces and post the videos to his channel. He’s really. really. good. His emotions are so raw, he doesn’t even have to be singing for them to come out and it’s frankly… enchanting. A decent chunk of his viewers started watching because Joe is hot AF™ but they stayed because he’s talented and smart as a whip. While Joe does love The Clash and other punk groups, he one thing that speaks to his soul is an angry John Darnielle. That’s right kids: The Mountain Goats. They serve as a lot of inspiration for his original songs. So Joe plays and talks mostly about music, but he also talks about things like art, fashion, and COMIC BOOKS. Listen, he preorders that shit, he has whole videos just about how excited he is for some edition of some comic. So, Web stumbled upon one of his videos, this particular one about an artist, and ugh, everything about this guy just rubs him the wrong way. He falls down a rabbit hole of Joe’s review videos and he decides he basically can’t stand him or any of his very wrong opinions. Don’t ask him why he hit subscribe. Joe finds Web in his Suggested Videos Feed and listens for maybe two minutes to Web talk about his college classes and all the literature he’s reading and all the things he knows now and he’s like, fuck this guy. Joe just thinks he’s so pretentious. He likes The Catcher in the Rye. Like, come on, dude. Most of Web’s videos are about literature. Books and Poetry he’s read and likes/dislikes. He really enjoys the Transcendentalists. He loves the themes of man v nature and the natural imagery and how they talk about what makes up the human soul. Joe fucking hates Transcendentalism. As far as he’s concerned, they were a bunch of rich, white men who pretended to be one with nature or some bullshit but didn’t acknowledge the privilege of their status or even mention the fact that they could go back to their cushy homes whenever they liked! Eventually they bump heads and get into a few times through comments. They can’t stand one another, can’t see anything from the other’s point of view… UNTIL Until Web listens to one of Joe’s original songs. And it’s so raw and personal and the lyrics! He can’t believe how beautiful the lyrics are! They’re simple and effective and they hit him right in the chest. Until Joe listens to some of Web’s spoken word poetry. It’s not his usually style, it’s flow-y and flowery and romantic. But it’s fucking beautiful and it stirs emotions in Joe he’d forgotten about. Joe also listens to Web go on and on about his ideas for the books he wants to write. And he finds it’s almost impossible not to fall in love with Web like this, so animated and happy. Here’s what happens: they meet sometime in real life, maybe at Vidcon, and after arguing for forever, they decide to try and put there heads together and write a song. Joe on the music and Web on the words. And it’s great. Their ideas are different, but they feed off of each other well, and they find a good balance. They record a video of it, Joe performing with his guitar and Web watching him, taking notes, even. And when the music trails off and they fall into each other, the kiss doesn’t make it to the final cut of the video. Neither does the making out on Joe’s hotel bed.

Babe Heffron and John Julian Their videos are just fun and silly shenanigans. They play games (lots of Cards Against Humanity) and do every youtube challenge. ever. Chubby Bunny and the Cinnamon Challenge are two of their most viewed videos. So many stupid dares. So many ER visits, all filmed and all with an angry Guarno grumbling about how fucking stupid these “kids” are. Julian: I am not a kid! Bill: Come talk to me when your foot isn’t in a boot, alright? They have more than one video of them trying to do parkour. I mean, how do you think they ended up in the hospital? The channel is called Orange Julian and their icon/header image is the two of them, wearing only boxer-briefs, completely covered in orange body paint. They’re standing next to each other, purposefully looking a little awkward. Like, it’s almost album art worthy. All of this for a stupid Orange Julius pun that only like 1/3 of their viewers get.

Renee Lemaire Renee has a small channel about her life! It has lots of sweet things in it! Soft, gay vibes!!! Her dog. Her cat. Her good friends, Gene Roe and Ralph Spina. Delicious food and cooking! Crazy/hilarious/gross stories about working in the children’s ward of the hospital. Her experiences in America as a French woman. French history lessons! French language lessons in modern day/interesting/specific vocabulary! Gene and Spina often come on and they have culture clash videos about France and America at large. Sometimes Gene will talk about Cajun culture or stories or food. And Renee and Spina will sit there just bewildered by everything he says. Sometimes Renee and Gene will trail off in French conversations together, leaving Spina to either complain loudly OR look into the camera like he’s on The Office™ Renee can only upload like every other week or so because she’s so busy. But her viewers don’t mind! Her videos are like little presents!

GENERATION KILL

Rudy Reyes Rudy also keeps a diary! It’s called “Fruity Rudy” and the graphic has a cute lil peach on it. He always films in his living room during the day. The video and audio are both super high quality and he even has a nice front light. He looks fucking beautiful, as always. He just talks about his day, his friends and family, whatever subjects he’s been thinking about recently. And his house is always fucking perfect. 9 times out of 10 Pappy is in the kitchen cooking, slightly out of focus, while wearing an apron. He likes to listen to Rudy do his thing while he prepares dinner or w/e (cooking and baking is a big hobby of his). Every once in a while he’ll comment on something Rudy says or talks about, or he’ll poke fun at someone or tell a joke. Usually the mic picks up what he says, but it’s faint and Rudy adds in little subtitles in the bottom of the screen. And he either reacts with a fond smile of some kind of comment or comeback. The viewers love their banter because they’re HELLA MARRIED Like literally. And also figuratively. Like sometimes Rudy will call back to Pappy to ask him questions, sometimes looking for a real answer, sometimes because he knows the kind of sassy reaction he’ll get, and he’ll just roll his eyes at the camera. He gets like a million comments a day telling him that they adore Pappy. “omg u guys are so cute” “I wish pappy was in more videos!!” “is pappy his real name? if not, what is?” When Rudy hits 10,000 subscribers (“wow, that’s insane, thanks you guys!!!”) as a present, he makes this big reveal video of Pappy’s name. “Drum roll please… *drums on his thighs* it’s Larry.” *in the background* “RUDE, WHAT THE FUCK?” *uncontrollable giggles from Rudy* *the camera is lifted from it’s place by ~~someone~~ unseen and a blurry Rudy can be seen half-heartedly protesting before the footage cuts*

Ray Person Ray is basically iDubbbz/h3h3 He’ll get all of his friends to participate in stupid videos. Mostly it’s Walt, Christenson, or sometimes Q-tip or Gabe. But sometimes he’s by himself, it just depends. So we get lots of these types of gems. (x) (x)  Brad hardcore pretends like he doesn’t want to be a part of it but look, he operates the camera for every video, he’s not fooling anyone. It’s hard to mistake his laughter when he’s right next to the mic. Sometimes Ray keeps in the little bits where Brad comments or calls him an idiot and you can see Ray look behind the camera, laughing and smiling or giving it right back. Ray’s channel is nuts!! but every once in a blue moon Ray will upload a video called “Serious Talk #1” (and so on) where he talks about something he really cares about or is really bugging him. And people are like, I knew you were smart, but oh jeez, this is scary.

Nate Fick The videos started out as study tools for his undergrad students but eventually gained a legit following. So, it’s basically an educational channel, but there’s no company or anything funding him. He tries to be as professional looking as possible, though. He talks about history! All types of history! And guess what, this boy is salty about the many, many important peoples and their accomplishments that are always left out of textbooks and shit. And he’s going to do his best to cover them properly. As in, entire episodes dedicated to shit (most) people don’t know. And he was in the military, so he has… lots of feelings about that as well. If he talks about military history or social issues he puts a disclaimer in the beginning of the video like “This is tainted by my feelings, I can’t help it, but this is my channel and I’m gonna say what I like.” He has some crash courses and some videos that go way too in depth. Like, maybe calm down, boy scout. Brad and Mike are his most frequent guests. He’ll do things like quiz them (on shit he knows they don’t know) or ask them for their opinions or direct the whole freaking lesson just to them. Brad and Mike really like picking on him, but he knows they love him. He invited Ray on the channel once. Once. It was… an experience. But Ray surprisingly, or not so surprisingly, has some really well educated and in depth thoughts on certain subjects. He gets lots of comments from girls/boys being like, “Hello, Professor Hottie.” (He gets the same reaction from many of his undergrads, so he’s used to it.) BUT most of his following watches because they’re interested in what he has to say, so don’t worry.

Poke Espera Poke has a channel with no schedule or organization. The video’s care shot from a cheap video camera and he doesn’t have a proper mic. And you know the Channel name is literally just his name. It’s literally all just videos of him from the chest up with titles like: “THOUGHTS ON ALL THE BULLSHIT” and “I’M GONNA KILL ME A WHITE BOY” and “PAUL RYAN CAN SUCK MY THICK LATIN DICK” They’re always in all caps. You knows the type. Yes, he does have a whole video dedicated to the story of the time he saw a dude get killed behind a Tastee-Freez. He has over 2 mil followers and all the boys are like …how? He just has good things to say, yo. People appreciate the cruel honesty.

Q-Tip and Christenson These cute boys have a let’s play channel! It’s pretty straight forward, they just play whatever games they like the best and sometimes play other games on request. It’s got Game Grumps vibes because it’s these two dudes who are BEST FRIENDS and they spend nearly every episode talking about whatever they want. And usually they want to talk about each other. Because they’re hardcore Bros. They get some of their friends to sit with them and play or just talk, depends. But their most requested repeat guest is Ray. Because Ray sure as hell doesn’t need a camera on his face to be animated as fuck. Also There’s lots of singing. Almost too much singing. At least they have excellent taste in music.

The Lady Marine (Whose Name We Unfortunately Don’t Know) She has a youtube channel that she really enjoys putting a lot of creativity into! Like, it’s great quality, for starters, and she also designs her own awesome graphics and animation!! She’s so talented!! Because everything is so damn quality, she only puts out a video every couple of weeks. But they’re pretty lengthy and always SUPER worth it. It’s about her (current) career in the military and focuses on a lot of social justice themes. Not only does she a) have a lot of interesting/enlightening things to say, but b) she also understands her privilege as a white woman and plugs for a lot of other women of color vloggers when she talks about something a little out of her depth or better said by someone who actually experiences it. She has a very complex view of the military and simultaneously knows how it manipulates/harms people and can’t help but love her job. She feels like she was born to do it, honestly. Idiot men come at her in the comments and she gets a lot of harassment. But let me tell you… She takes those motherfuckers out. You thought she was just talking shit? Bitch, she has 8 peer-reviewed scientific studies! She can cite her sources, all 2 dozen of them! She knows her shit, don’t test her. And if that doesn’t satisfy you, she’s always got her M16. One time she slams a dude so hard it goes viral over night and she gets hundreds of new followers, most of them young women looking for some source of empowerment and encouragement. She takes her new role very seriously. She will always, always listen and talk to young girls who are struggling or need an outlet or someone to talk to who won’t get upset with them for thinking X or Y. I love her, she’s my wife.

THE PACIFIC

Bob Leckie Leckie’s channel is called “Dear, Vera.” Each video is an adorable virtual letter to his wife, who he is just crazy smitten with. They started out as literal messages when Leckie was traveling for his first book tour (very proud of him). Like, he would literally just write out letters and then read them to the camera. Of course, Leckie is the most poetic idiot on the planet, and lots of people started following him because his words were honestly so beautiful. Even if he’s extra as heck. The following isn’t huge, but it’s substantial, and he still addresses each video to his wife. So he talks about whatever he likes. It was updates about his life when he was traveling, but when he’s home he likes to get creative about it. And not every episode is so serious. He invites dudes from Team Leckie to come hang all the time! And the boys are always like, “Hi, Vera!” and wave like she’s actually there. (She’s in the next room doing a Sudoku puzzle or something). Every video, he signs of with, “Yours, Robert.” AND AND AND when Vera tells him they’re going to be parents, Leckie gets extra extra. But it’s so cute, like, he makes a single video about it. He opens it with, “To my future child” And he basically goes on this whole teary-eyed kind of schpiel about how he’s so exited to meet them and how he and Vera are going to love them unconditionally and protect them and do their absolute best to keep them happy. He signs off with, “With love, your father.”

Hoosier Smith Hoosier is literally Cr1tiKal

Eugene Sledge Eugene’s channel is about ornithology, botany, and BEES! He loves bees! He uses the channel to geek out over biology things and it has so many cute graphics and jingles. Like, I mean, it’s hella gay. And he’s kind of awkward, but it’s so endearing. Most of his subscribers are girls and mlm and he’s just like, huh *shrug* He has little segments about current scientific events/findings. He has a birb of the week. It’s just… so nerdy. Like, chill out, dude. (Jk pls don’t ever chill out, follow your passions.) Snafu refuses to be in videos but he shouts at him from other rooms in the house, being a dick on purpose, calling him nerd, telling him to shut up. But Eugene is pretty good at coming back at him. He’s known Snafu too long for that kind of shit to actually bother him. And Eugene is like 70% sass, anyway.

Eddie Jones Eddie has a channel entirely dedicated to his original music!!! All his spending money goes to instruments and high quality recording equipment and audio editing software. He’s so good. Like. He’s got this warbling kind of sweet and broken voice. It’s very similar to jpitts, actually. And there’s so much heart in it. Not to mention the songs he writes are amazing and have clever lyrics. And guess what, boys and girls!!! Andy Haldane can sing. But he’s super shy about it. He and Eddie have had so many conversations that are like “Andy, come on, one video” “Nooo…” “Just one!” “Eddie, I caaaan’t” (Andy gets a little whiny when he’s nervous) So Andy won’t sing in a video BUT his soft voice can be heard harmonizing in some official recordings. Eddie loves listening to Andy sing. He’s not perfect or anything, but his voice is pretty and light and Eddie’s head over heels for him, so he can’t help but love it.

So, like I said. Way too long. But I had so much fun thinking up this stuff, so time well spent! I just did the boys (and girls) who came naturally to me when I tried to think of who would have a YouTube Channel. If anyone feels like adding to this monstrosity, go for it!

[deaky-disco-queen]

For the fanfic end of the year asks! 1, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30!

Okay, so I hate clogging up other people’s dashes so I put this under a read more otherwise I will feel terrible

1. Favorite Fic you wrote this year

That’s probably And We Can Have Forever and Knock Me Down For A Six Anytime

3. favorite line/scene 

Probably the closet banter scene from All You Have To Do Is Fall In Love because it’s sweet and silly. 

4. total number of words you wrote this year

68,955 on AO3 but not everything I write is on there so it’s probably a bit more

5. most popular fic this year

Most popular by Hits is my Tumblr Ask collection, then Down Beside That Red Firelight. By Kudos though, it’s Bring Out The Funk. 

7. longest completed fic you wrote this year

And We Can Have Together with 5046 words

8. shortest completed fic this year

All Your Love Tonight with 880 words

9. longest wip of the year 

I’m not counting the Ask collection so it’s Bring Out The FUnk even thought that’s probably not counting as a WIP anymore

10. shortest wip of the year

none, actually. 

11. fandom you enjoyed writing for the most this year

Queen

12. favorite character to write about this year

Brian for some reason. He’s just kind of fun and interesting to write about. 

13. favorite writing song/artist/album this year

I’m not listening to a lot of music while writing but I did listen a lot to Zelda & Chill when I felt like I needed something else for a change.

14. a fic you didn’t expect to write

All of them? I never published any of my (english) writing before and it was a pretty spontaneous decision to make this sideblog in the first place so.. All of them. 

15. something you learned this year

My writing doesn’t suck as much as I thought it did and smut is not half as scary to write as I used to think. 

16. fics you completed this year

I mostly write one shots so most of them. I think it’s like 21 out of 24 published fics are completed.

17. fics you’ll continue next year

I kind of have no ongoing things going on at the moment but I do plan to continue the Tomorrow brings Tomorrow brings Love series (or the BDSM CLub Au as I am mostly calling it)

18. current number of wips

3!

19. any new fics to start next year

Yes! My New Year’s resolution is writing a multichapter story. I don’t know which one yet but I have several ideas. 

21. most memorable comment/review

There’s two. (I’m not going to tag them bc they don’t really need to have to scroll through this whole thing just for this)

This one by BisexualRoger on Nice and Warm: 

Ok so obviously I want to talk about how wholesome this fic is, and how much I loved the ending with Freddie being so patient and reassuring with helping Roger navigate his new thoughts and such, but first I just want to say that the whole scene with the jacket is like, the most accurate representation of trying to handle a drunk person that I’ve ever seen. I just- “Rog, focus, please. Do you have a jacket?” - asdhjfkf that’s so exactly what it’s like and that whole exchange had me snorting with laughter.

Ahaha anyway like I said, I loved how soft and sweet this whole fic was, but especially the ending 💗 That was very touching

and this one by jessahmewren on Knock Me Down For A Six Anytime: 

Oooh this was so incredibly hot and there’s so much I love about it! Number one, Rog in a dominate position. I think we all get stuck in subbing Rog and I love to write and read him Domming and you wrote him so beautifully here. He’s so unbelievably hot and such a star. Ugh, I can’t get enough of this Rog. Number two, the roleplay is just phenomenal. The outfits…those girls are hot as peppers aren’t they? I was drooling hon. That image of them all lined up for their spankings is burned into my brain. Just stunning. And finally the smut was delish. I just love the ideas of the boys having fun roleplaying like this. It’s just a great use of the prompt and really hot. And dom!Rog is my cup of tea all day long. Excellent.

But also shoutout to the lovely Jenfly/queensilveryfly who actually takes the time and comments on almost all of my fics. I know she probably won’t see this but I needed to say that because it makes me happy. 

22. events you participated in this year

Every shipweek that has and will be happening (I’m too lazy to list them all) and the One Year BoRhap exchange. 

23. fics you wanted to write but didn’t 

There’s a pretty long outline for a slow burn breaky fic that I never really got started on which I think is pretty sad because I am very fond of the idea still. Other than that there is not much. I have a list of stuff I want to write but haven’t yet but that’s a different story

24. favorite fic you read this year

Definitely Tikini’s Princes of the Universe. Two reasons: Sci-Fi and she’s just such a great writer. 

25 A fic you read this year you would recommend everyone read

Uh, also Princes of the Universe by Tikini, I guess. It’s great. But I also adore sweetillusion’s a million lights above you and can warmly recommend it. 

26. number of favorites/bookmarks you made this year

I don’t know, countless ones. Probably a couple of hundreds. 

27. favorite fanfic author this year

I can’t play favorites at all. I’m not good at it. 

28 longest fic you read this year

I’ve been reading a very long Game of Thrones fanfiction since the beginning of the year, I’m not done yet but I’m at chapter 200 from 217 and the full word count is over a million so I think that’s the longest one. 

29. shortest fic you read this year

Gosh, I honestly don’t know. 

30. favorite fandom to read fic from this year

Queen!

[missladymilly]

Story offffffff favorite party whether it be family or drunken mess

Ohhhhweeeee! I haven't been to that many parties haha. But would have to be Caleb Crackerjacksons 18th. It was just great to reconnect with all my childhood friends, quality cool Christian kids. We played twister, listened to back in the day old school songs. Drank lots of wine and mixed it with other drinks to make it duller, cause that's what I do for fun. And there was lots of food, and ended up drinking a decent amount of coffee too haha. Ye that was a good chill party experience in my opinion. No silly drunkeness. Just games and good banter. But I really wanted to smokeeeeee! But oh well haha.

[2dudesgethitched]

Spelling Dad from ADD.

  “How do you feel about children?” he asked me on that magical Christmas Eve in 2008. We are at too large of a table for two people on a patio of ribbons, decked halls and twinkle lights. Ooooh, pretty lights sparkle so. We waited for our coffee drinks under trimmed trees, gay apparel donned. The crowd at Aroma Café was heavy with packages, burdens from the shopping that is a draw to the Tujunga Village part of Studio City. I love the idea of a hamlet in the land of hams. I need more irony in my diet. People banged about like cattle down a chute. Calling Temple Grandin.

 My ADD is self-diagnosed and provides me ample amusement; sometimes others get to share in the joy that is my rambling. The stream of consciousness that I surf regularly makes me a fine Improv actor but an ineffective bureaucrat. Years later someone would shout “Squirrel” and I completely understood a cartoon dog’s pov.

 Christ, he just asked me something. Focus, Hubble, focus. If my self-narration annoys feel free to substitute Neil Patrick Harris voice or Sara Jessica Parker’s. My patter might be more palatable. How do I feel about children?

 Michael’s bright blue eyes, red cheeks and pale pallor defined the ‘Richie Cunningham’ description our mutual friend Rob had promised. Ha. Red, white and blue. He’s pretty cute, shivering in his p-coat. The lyrics to “American Boy” popped up. Stifle, silly ADD, stifle. Listen to the cute boy who is saying all the right things. I had arrived early to the date. I had armed myself viewing all the pictures he had posted on his MySpace. He had a butt-load of friends and loved the beach. I knew we had at least that, Tom & Rob as common denominators. He was tall, handsome and quirky. Our previous phone conversation confirmed quirky.

 “Hello, Villa Cosa Nostra, Michael speaking, how may I help you?”

“Is this Michael Vinton?”

“Tis I” Tis I. Tis I? I’m calling a boutique timeshare and got transferred to a Renaissance Faire Restaurant?

“This is Tony Spatafora, Rob Hahn’s friend.” Beat. Beat.

“Oh. Hi..”

“I know you’re at work, is this an okay time to talk?”

“Let me put you on hold for a second? Thanks.” Boom. Gone.

 He is so Googling me now. I think. Or he’s shuttering his work-hag so he can come back to the call a little more centered. I can’t wait to hear what comes back on the line.

 “Heeeeyy, “ a much cooler cat returns. “How ya doing?”

“Fine. “ Eyeroll. Stop Spats, don’t be such an egotistical putz. “Rob Hahn said to give you a call and that we should probably get together.”

“Yeah. He said.” Ice, ice baby. Who sang that, I wondered “So, what’s up….”?

Saints preserve me.

“Listen, I know you’re at work. Why don’t you give me a call when it’s convenient and we can set something up?”

“Cool, man.” Oh, this kid is killing me. Did I mention that my angel is 14 years my junior? Yeah. Apply considerable mockery here, I deserve it.

“I’ll just get your cell, and get back to you.”

“Fine, ” I’m not finished playing with my food, “but let me ask you three things: Dog or cat?”

“Dog.” He’s confident.

“Boston or New York?”

“…New York.” He vacillated.

“And finally, like garlic or love garlic.”

“LOVE garlic.” He wins. I spit game like no other. Who sang that damn song??

“Okay. You may call me back.”

Laughter.

 I thrive on acid tests and omens. I believe The Universe will give you signs when you are falling behind in it’s choreography. You are encouraged to free style only so often. Don’t waste your moment to jump in the abyss. Your pants can only get wet one of two ways when you dance. Go big or go home, I think I’d read that on some ones Friendster. I am so full of myself I should hang Charmin off my belt.

 I had seen him heading to the café from a quaint store in the Village. In fact he had stopped in the window in front of my to check his hair. The afternoon was windy. Norman Rockwell snow falling lightly would have completed the picture. Oh, my. He is a cutie. Those eyes were so blue. I stalked him down the sidewalk praying there would be more preening to mock later to my besty Sue. He walked like a man, firm and grounded while sporting an angel’s face. These omens are good. I couldn’t wait to hear from ‘Tis I’ what made this guy tick.

 Michael turned around in front of Aroma to find me, hot on his heels. He laughed and I gave him the big loving hug I like to share with my nearest and dearest. I wanted to warm his heart on this holiday night before we both had to race back to work. I would learn later that he really welcomed that hug as it was to be his first Christmas away from his wonderful family in Charlotte, NC. He was a little sad and in need of some familiar love. The guy has the big heart of a softie I would learn. Tick tick tick, boom goes the heart.  

 I thought he was shivering. He kept squirming over his shoulder then craning his neck back to me. Does he have a tic? He kept exhaling over his shoulder. I was intrigued; did I step in something while hunting my prey down the mean streets of the San Fernando Valley? He finally calls out the chair dancing he’s doing as being gassy today & also he is from a very gassy family. I got a fuzzy image of the holidays with the family. He was trying to subtly burp. I got that. Cool.

 “How do I feel about children? You mean as a family or laborers in my families sweatshop in New Haven?” More Charmin, senator? Truth was I did want a family. More than anything else I have ever wanted. I wanted to focus all that I am into people who would hopefully, one day, go out and use their powers for good. I have the biological family, the chosen family, the work family, and the Partridge family. I had a lock on “Back-up singers” and caregivers that all had a special place in my heart. I was finally ready at 40 to have a family unit. Children, progeny attendants whatever you want to call them. I was ready to raise.

 I hoped that in raising children, I would raise myself. I had always been a selfish impulsive prick. I could leave disaster in my wake better and brighter then most boobs my age. I’d been there, done that and brought back the t-shirt in two sizes (for my fat + fit days) Glib is an understatement to describe me, Crazed is another. Children would allow me to put all the attention I had put into myself to a positive end. My epic life experiences and families would help lift the children up; it takes a village I have been told.

 I had always seen myself with a large family. That was how we grew up in CT and I wanted to create something similar. Economics and Biology being what it may, it was going to take extra work and love but above all it would take the right mate to accomplish this with. Michael told me he had seen a similar vision but did the typical blanch one does when finding out there might be five more just like me out there in the world. Silly man, he has no idea.

 All of my wonderful family had paired up and reproduced. There are thirteen amazing nephews and nieces with birthdays to remember and events to celebrate. Being as far away as I am in Los Angeles can fray the nerves. The day to day growth of the kids gets away from you when updates aren’t delivered regularly. It is much easier to share around a family dinner table or a get together in state. Time flies and raising kids seemed to occupy and awful lot of it. Notes for later, I would record. I wished for a village that can act locally and think globally I guess.  I have a Village People cd I haven’t played in a while.

 And sometimes it takes a Village Idiot. Burpie and me made nice and I dropped a few more witty pearls of banter. We clicked on many levels. We had both thought we would have been priests, except for that annoying celibacy thing. We loved music. Our families were the most important things in our lives. Our dreams were huge. We wanted to see the world but above all wanted children. Oh, and grandchildren too.

 Well this was going to be tough, being two men and no little lady. We appear to be Biologically Adjacent to speak Angeleno, in the act of conception. There were to be a few extra steps to get our family unit to the amazing holiday card ready cast that my friends had biologically created ad nauseum. We would have to decide about Adoption; Domestic or International? Foster to Adoption; how old the child will we go? Surrogacy; who’s friend to raise a turkey baster to in this above generous gift they were providing? Surrogacy when not related in love or blood; do we find these people on Craigslist, Angie’s List, Facebook? There was to be much to learn but I had a feeling that Michael was the one to make the journey with.

 Real it in Spats, I chanted. Let’s not put the station wagon in front of the horse. If this really was a ‘traditional valued’ gay man I couldn’t rush the situation and would have to let this unfold. Guys like this were few and far between. Chill baby, baby, chill baby baby. Really ADD? Vanilla Ice? I’m hipper than that.

 Actually, I’m not getting any younger as people would tell me and FYI get a move on when they stop telling you this. It might be the Universe giving you a reality check to start listening and fall into line. Tick Tock, Tick Tock goes the biological clock. Wait, what? I was forty but determined. Many great people I knew personally had started their families late in life. I have energy to boot and an inner monologue that wouldn’t shut up. I am going to rock this fatherhood thing into the next stage of my life and hum show tunes for lullabies.

 I held his hand as we walked out of the café. It was in part a thank you for sharing so much of his sweet soul as he had his time on a crazy Christmas Eve. His eyes are illuminating. There was a sense of promise in one so gassy. I saw a fuzzy family unit off in the future, a pin prick of light, each day growing closer and larger. It came into frame and I saw the tall person in the image was wearing a p-coat and an enormous, toothy smile.

 OH, SNAP! It wasn’t Vanilla Ice, it was C & C Music Factory. Mmmmm. Things that make you go Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm.  I am too old for ‘oh, snap’ I remind myself. Yet I’m not too old to learn. Papa, Dad, Daddy; I like it. I wonder what I’ll be when I grow up.

 Cue the music.