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#i know i say this all the time but i literally cannot stop thinking about her in so many ways
7ndipity · 2 days
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How They Would Propose
Ot7 x Reader
Summary: Headcanons about how each of the members would propose to their S/o
Warnings: none
A/N: Thank you to the lovely @bethanysnow for this request and for helping me brainstorm ideas! I hope you like it!😘
Masterlist
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Jin:
Jin loves making big gestures, like he literally brought his own confetti to an award show, so he would definitely want to go for a more grand, classically romantic proposal.
Like you would come home one evening to the house filled with heart shaped helium balloons floating around. 
Once you make your way through the forest of balloons, you find him waiting for you in the living room or on the balcony, in a suit and tie, surrounded by flowers.
And although he’s so incredibly sure about this, he can’t help but feel nervous, his hands shaking as he pulls out the notecards he prepared.
His speech would be simple, but so full of his love for you and the life you’ve built together, by the time he finishes speaking and drops to one knee, you’re already in tears and saying yes.
Yoongi: 
Yoongi would propose in a way that’s very quiet and personable to the two of you, just like everything else in your relationship.
I’ve said this in his dating hcs, but I see him half-jokingly asking you to marry him so often that when he finally does say it seriously, you might not take it as such at first.
It would probably happen either first thing in the morning as you’re having breakfast, or last thing at night as you’re getting ready for bed. Those quiet little moments of domesticity show him how much he want this forever
“I wanna marry you.” “I know, baby.” “No, really. I want to marry you.” You turn around and he’s holding out a ring box to you. “I mean, if you’ll have me?”
Once the initial shock wears off, you half-jokingly demand that he asks you properly, which he does, quickly dropping to one knee. Then you say yes.
Hobi:
Hobi would want to make your proposal as lavish and memorable as possible. Like he loves any opportunity to dote on and spoil you.
Like I see him surprising you with a weekend getaway to somewhere coastal so the two of you could just relax together on the beach for a few days.
But then on the final evening, as you’re watching the sunset together, he turns to you and drops down on one knee.
He has a whole speech prepared, but in the moment, he’s so overcome with emotion that he forgets half of it and basically sums it up with “I cannot imagine my life without you. Will you please marry me?”
He manages to keep it together until you say yes and then he breaks down in tears as he slips the ring on your finger.
Namjoon:
Despite being a man who’s well known for his ability to weave words together into heartbreakingly beautiful lyrics, I think when it comes to his own proposal, he would be surprisingly simple.
He would bring it up after a normal date night as you're walking together through the park or something, waiting till you’ve stopped to admire the view before he decides to speak.
He would start off talking about some study he read that showed how being married can benefit ones health, extend life expectancy, etc. He would then shift to how much you mean to him, how much you’ve changed him for the better, how much he loves you.
“And so,” He pulls out the ring box, sliding it over to you somewhat shyly, almost afraid to meet your eyes. “If you're willing, would you please marry me?”
Of course you immediately say yes.
Jimin:
Jimin would want to plan something more cozy and classic, like a romantic dinner at home or at one of your favorite restaurants.
He would be so nervous, fidgeting around half the evening until you ask him if he’s alright, and then he just spills it all out.
He would have a somewhat short, but sweet speech, going over how much you mean to him, how thankful he is to have you in his life, and how he hopes for the two of you to spend the rest of your lives together.
By the time he finishes speaking, you're both crying, moving to hug each other tightly as you say yes.
After a few moments, you both manage to compose yourselves enough to separate so that he can slip the ring on your finger, before immediately pulling you close again.
Taehyung:
Tae would want to make a grand romantic gesture, similar to Jin, but on a slightly smaller scale, more personalized to the two of you.
He would pick one of your favorite places, asking you to meet him there fro date night instead of him picking you up, which already makes you suspicious that something’s up.
But nothing could quite prepare you for the scene you’re met with as you walk in, candles and your favorite flowers covering every surface, creating an almost dreamlike atmosphere. And in the middle of it all stands Tae, grinning widely at you.
His speech is short, telling you how much he loves you, and promising as he drops to one knee that he will do everything in his power to try and make you as happy in life as you make him.
You can’t even say yes, just nodding as he slips the ring onto your hand.
Jungkook:
I see Jungkook going one of two ways with a proposal; either super elaborate, destination proposal with a beautifully planned out speech, or completely impromptu confession when he just blurts it out
He would want to plan an amazing weekend away together, where he would have a whole scene planned out with the flowers and candles and a speech that he's been writing and rewriting for weeks/months.
But it ends up happening very suddenly but naturally, as you’re getting ready for bed one night and he’s just watching you picking out your clothes and setting your alarm for the next day, and it just slips out. “Marry me, please?”
You whip around in shock, but he’s just staring up at you with so much love and sincerity that you don’t don’t even hesitate to say yes.
He’d be kinda embarrassed afterwards, but neither of you really mind, because it was his true feelings in that moment and that made it all the more special to you.
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @mother2monsters @comingupwithacoolnameishard @universal-travel-er @bo0o0o0ooo @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz
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tyunn1ngz · 2 days
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Yeonjun being your ceo hubby and you both got in a argument but had to go to a party so he spent the whole night talking with other people and you got bored so you went to go dance with a guy and Yeonjun pulled you back saying
"I know we aren't in good terms at the moment but if you think I'm gonna let you be touched by another man that isn't me the you are fucking crazy"
And either you tell him to fuck off and it turns into angry sex when you both get back or he drags you out the party and he drives to a empty car park and you both fuck in the backseat 😁
UR INSANNEEEEEEEEEEEE. cw hes kinda mean and hypocritical ? idk also i got so carried away w this dont ask me why its 1k words i literally dk what happened,,,,
no bc i imagine it would be something sooooo petty, something that clearly needed to just be chatted about but the time just slips and suddenly your attitude is just through the roof while you have to converse at this stupid party with a bunch of snobs who you decide in the heat of your anger he’s just like (you know he’s not)
and every word yeonjun speaks just serves to piss you off more >:( that dumb smile on his face like he didn’t upset you and then cater to everyone else with such ease. pretending like everything’s okay, like how dare he ! 🙄
the final straw being that maybe he laughs a little too loud at one of his employees jokes, leaned a little too close in to hear them, allowed touches that linger too long to be friendly intentions; all while he’s almost completely ignored you all evening, when you were only here for him anyway— all dolled up just for him to argue with you and then ignore you.
so you take your interest elsewhere, allowing whatever guest next hits you with a ‘no pretty little thing like you should be pouting like that’ to be your entertainment.
it doesn’t work as intended at first, your eyes consistently darting back and forth between this stranger and yeonjun, who seemingly doesn’t pay you any mind. you deflate a little, chugging back the rest of the champagne in your glass.
and then, this stranger, who you have yet to gain the name of, tries to touch you. he starts with a click of his tongue, grinning as he tilts his head a little. ‘come on, darling. don’t look so sad. i’ll keep you company… get you another drink?’ and his hands begin a slide for your waist.
alas! he’s abruptly stopped by a grasp on his wrist, tight and practically a chokehold around the limb. you know those fingers anywhere.
‘they’re fine. thanks.’ yeonjun says, composed and completely nonchalant on the surface of his tone. but you can see his grip must hurt, can hear the dip of frustration in his voice.
and then you’re being lead by his hands, gentle loving touch ever not present, until the breeze of night air bites at your skin. you frown, and pull yourself free from his clutch, standing before him looking just as frustrated as he seems to feel.
‘the hell are you doing?’ to which he scoffs a laugh, cold as the temperature that wisps at your face in bursts of wind.
‘the fuck are you doing?’
your brows furrow, anger settling under your skin again, your whole body tense. ‘what the fuck’s that supposed to mean?’
‘were you just going to let him lay his hands on you? you seemed real comfortable.’ he’ll tell you, tongue in cheek. it’s unbelievable, completely ironic that you feel maniacal.
‘you can’t be fucking serious,’ you smile despite yourself, ‘you cannot be fucking serious, yeonjun.’
silence falls over you two for a moment, every ticking second he just looks more and more pissed. you stand there practically urging him on, disbelief written across your features in such clear displays. yet, he’s still quiet, and somehow it scares you just a little. but fuck, he’s such a hypocrite! you’re the bad guy when he had hands on himself all night with no protest? you are the one in trouble like he didn’t ignore you all alone at his work party?
‘let’s go.’
you’re broken from your reverie of rageful stomping thoughts, the build up of all the mean things you want to scream at him quickly fading. now a little thrown off by the calmness of his voice, tone void of any actual emotion, your mouth drops open a little despite nothing to say.
‘huh?’
‘i said, we’re going.’
dumbfounded, you find yourself tugged along again, towards the car park where you think an awkward, tense ride home will await you. where you expect a pillow and spare blanket thrown haphazardly over the couch by the end of the night.
the last thing on your mental list to expect is being pushed up against the passenger side door, caged in with a finger under your chin, a hand on your hips. your eyes are frantic in search of explanation as you look up at your husband in shock.
his thumb moves to your lips, pressing into the soft flesh where you've already parted in a quiet gasp. yeonjun grins a little, eyes dark and full of mirth.
‘you've had an attitude all day, baby,' he'll say, 'you know well there's nobody else for me than you, hm? no matter how bratty you get with me.'
you gently bite as his finger in retort, 'still doesn't explain your sudden work wife, does it?'
his grin widens, a tad scary in terms of trying to provoke a more negative response. 'just like you throwing yourself at my coworker, yeah? bit desperate for attention, don't you think?'
you bristle, 'he was keeping me company while you whored yourself out, but okay.'
he doesn't falter like you want him to, but his hands tighten on you. he tilts his head.
'yeah? why don't you go back inside to him then? think he could fuck you right, sweetheart?'
oh.
you twitch a little, breath exhaled less confident than before, and he's quick to notice it with such a smug smile. you want to wipe it right off his face, but you fear everything you've built yourself up with tonight is quickly crumbling down.
'maybe he could.' but he can hear how unsure you sound, and he laughs. he's condescending you now. yeonjun hums, leaning closer.
'you don't sound so confident. what makes you think he could handle your attitude, anyway?'
you lack the words, the bite, falling so quiet as he stares at you intently. eyes trained on every tiny change your body language gives him. your eyes stare back, already glassy while your lips start to pout. but you snark once more.
'fuck you.'
it's a haze. because before you can even begin to think of saying anything further, he's got you in his backseat. you're bent over, his chest to your back, your attire completely dishevelled and underwear ripped down your legs, as he fucks into you so hard you know you'll feel it for days to come.
he pants hotly right into your ear, ‘you can be mad at me all you want, baby, but nobody touches you except me, you understand that?’
you can only mewl in response, already too fucked out as the pleasure turns your brain into mush. however, he’s not satisfied with that, and with a grunt he reels his hand back to lay a loud slap on the fat of your ass.
‘i asked you a question, i expect a fucking answer. or are you already too fucking stupid on my cock to talk?’
you sob, nodding your head frantically while you try to hold yourself up on trembling limbs. ‘yes, yes. i understand’
his thrusts manage to grow rougher, and you fall forward until your face presses into the leather of the seats.
‘so cute when you cry. you ready to apologise to me? hm? tell me you’re sorry for being such a brat to me.’
‘m’sorry!’ you cry, another spank this time landing on your thigh, ‘m’sorry, ‘jun. won’t happen again.’
he laughs as he throws his head back, hands on your hips to fuck you on his cock. he’s breathless but it’s so so hot.
‘liar. i’ve spoilt you too much. all you know now is how to get what you want. and this is what you wanted? for me to fuck some sense into you?’
you know it’s technically not true, he knows that too, but you start nodding frantically regardless. the haze of your pleasure renders you to his complete mercy.
‘yes! i’m sorry. just need you. always need you.’
‘you have me, angel.’ he grunts on a particularly harsh jolt of his hips, cock hitting a deeper angle as you cry out so loud you almost miss his words.
‘y’always have me. let me prove it to you? want me to knock you up? m’gonna make you a mommy.’
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fiapartridge · 1 day
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will smith dating hughes!sister headcanons! ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪
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🕊 - 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: will smith head canons! <3 🕊 - 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: not proofread, all sfw
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💌 - 𝐇𝐄'𝐋𝐋 never tell the guys, but his favorite thing to do with you is wear face masks and watch romcoms. sure, at first you had to really coax him into doing it, but as time went on, he would literally wait for sundays (which is the day you two usually did it) to come.
"i'll get the movie ready, you go grab the masks," he would say before kissing you on the forehead and gently pushing you toward the bathroom.
💌 - 𝐇𝐄 has a drawer at your place just for his clothes. he also leaves a bottle of cologne at your apartment so you can spray it on his hoodies in case he's on a roadie and his clothes are losing their smell. you probably wear his clothes more than he does but he doesn't mind. he loves seeing your tiny frame get swallowed in all of the fabric, especially in his t-shirts.
💌 - 𝐘𝐎𝐔 are his personal stylist. his friends would always dog him for getting styled by you, but tbh his outfits have gotten so much better ever since you guys got together - even the fans have noticed.
💌 - 𝐎𝐍 that note, the fans have no idea you guys are together. it's not like he's embarrassed of you or is like actively trying to hide you from the public eye, he just never posts unless it's like for a brand deal or he's announcing something to his followers. you post him all the time, but you have a small, private instagram account filled with friends and family. most of the time, the comments are just your brothers clowning your guys' relationship or the bc hockey team talking about how much a simp will is for you.
💌 - 𝐌𝐀𝐉𝐎𝐑 napper/cuddler. he cannot go to sleep without you in his arms. like if you guys are in the same bed and you're far apart from him, he either thinks he did something wrong and is apologizing profusely throughout the night, or that something is wrong with you in which he is doing the most to make sure you're okay.
"do i need to turn up the ac? should i remove some blankets? why don't you want to cuddle with me?" he is a baby.
💌 - 𝐇𝐄 makes playlists for you ALL THE TIME for every single occasion. he has a "love of my life" playlist for when he's feeling extra lovey dovey, a "pls don't be mad at me anymore, i'm so so so sorry" playlist for when he fucks up (which is rare but happens), a "y/n/n" playlist for when you're in the car with him -> it's your fave songs that has also become some of his fave songs (lots of taylor swift and sabrina carpenter), and a "gains with my hot gf" playlist for when you guys are working out together, which is much less intense than his normal workouts but still makes you work up a sweat.
💌 - 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐈𝐍𝐆 off that last note, you love working out with him. he's the best personal trainer. he'll hype you up, push you harder but not too hard because he still knows your limits and your body, will do every single workout with you, and it's also a plus to just watch him work out iykwim.
💌 - 𝐘𝐎𝐔 over think soo much!! and he's like relax, we're fine, we're okay, you're not annoying me, you never annoy me, it's impossible to annoy me because he just loves when you're around him and when you're talking. like he will literally put down his phone and just listen to you talk for hours. you never have to feel clingy with him because he just always wants you. he's always reassuring you <3 his texts are the cutest 📲📲📲 :
will: stop overthinking bub will: we are ok will: i love you will: i'll be over in 10
💌 - 𝐇𝐄 loves when you have your hands in his hair. like he will literally grab your hands and bring them to his hair. like he loves that shit. like brushing it with your fingers, braiding his tiny strands, or just playing with it like he doesn't care-- he just loves it.
💌 - 𝐇𝐈𝐒 love language is physical touch and words of affirmation!!
physical touch! he loves holding your hand, having his arm around your shoulder, hugging you, kissing you, just touching you whenever he can, even if it's just having his hand on your thigh or something. your brothers ! hate it ! they always pretend to gag if they see him touch you lol, but mama hughes always shuts their shit down and tells them that you're a grown woman that can make her own choices. i love mama ellen <3
words of affirmation! he will tell you he loves you every second of every single day. he loves telling you that you're pretty, especially when you feel the opposite. he just worships you. like you're literally a goddess to him. ⭐️ "i'm happy when you're around," he would whisper into your skin when you're cuddling in bed. ⭐️ "you are the prettiest girl i've ever seen." ⭐️ "fuck, you're hot." & he would have the most shit-eating grin everrrr. like he can't believe that he gets to be with you type shit.
𝐀𝐋𝐋 in all, someone let will know that i'm here and single and ready for him whenever he's free and available <3 thank you <3
-fiapartridge
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gleefullypolin · 1 day
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My top 10 ships
I haven't done this in forever, and I was bored and didn't feel like working so.....felt like an appropriate thing to do instead.
My top 10 ships!
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#1 Polin - Bridgerton
Did you really anticipate anyone else being at my top spot? Friends to lovers....Swoon! They have my heart, soul, and life. I literally love a girl who knows what she wants and a man who loves the fuck out of her like no other so this is like porn and comfort. Give me everything tonight and more!
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#2 Captain Swan - OUAT
If you aren't going to give me friends to lovers, I'll move over to Enemies and find my kind because holy hot out of hell, there is nothing better than Captain Hook and his smolder winning over Emma Swan. Fuck that man can burn! Years after that show ended and I can still sit in them and ruminate and catch myself on fire.
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#3 Clois - Smallville
There have been a lot of different Lois and Clark's out there, but none have been Erica Durance and Tom Welling. I've never been so happy and angry with a show in all my life. I used to wish so much against Lana Lang that I am embarrassed my own behavior. But I truly loved the banter and way these two brought these characters to live. It was marvelous.
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#4 Reylo - Star Wars
Being a Reylo shipper was like being sentenced to death and hell all at the same time for many years. We were bullied, tortured, shat on, and then given everything we wanted in 30 seconds only for them to fucking KILL HIM after a sacrifice. I have never both smiled, cried, and then curled into a ball in a theater so quickly that I wanted to die before. Even my family ridiculed me. It was torture but I still live there. I still ship it and you cannot make me stop!!
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#5 Fitzsimmons - Agents of Shield
The brilliant science couple put through so much that even they thought they were cursed. Pushed to find each other across time and space, kidnapped into a matrix, forced to fight one another, half the couple killed, duplicate versions of themselves, but champions of the hug, star crossed and so full of love. Friends to lovers, he fell first, she fell harder and GOD I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOR!
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#6 Starpollo - Battlestar Galactica
A couple who knew how to tear out my heart, throw it to the ground, and then trample it with their feet to ashes. While Lee and Kara were not destined to end up together, they damn sure made it hard not to want them to find a way. They truly loved each other more than anyone they were with in the show, but guilt always found a way to fuck that up for them. God it hurt to love you two.
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#7 Romanogers - Marvel Universe
Let's talk crack ships because oh how they break your heart. But it is glorious. This one is mine. I will forever love Nat and Steve and I will live in the space and time that they were on the road together living their lives without a banner. Because you can't tell me what they got up to! I refuse to believe you! But let's not talk about how it all ended because my heart still hurts and I don't like to talk about it!
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#8 Finchel - Glee
Since I'm already ripping my heart out, let's go all the way with it. Finchel has always been that ship that tears my heart to shreds. I was all in from the characters to the actors and I'll never honestly get over it. I'll probably always bleed Finn and Rachel, Cory and Lea. And I'll never be able to talk about it to normal people. It was something I lived, breathed, and honestly part of me died with. So I think that's enough of that.
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#9 Caryl - The Walking Dead
You can call this whatever it is, some say crack ship, I say...otherwise. It's my ship of ships for TWD. It's my coming home ship. Because that's what they are to each other. They are love. No one tell me otherwise, I live there, I love there. So do they. Deal with it.
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#10 Roschel - Friends
Look, say what you want, but I stayed home on Thursday nights just to watch whether they would or wouldn't. Nothing grabbed me like these two. They were lobsters, they were on a break, I didn't give a fuck what it was, only that they had me in a chokehold and that's what I realized what shipping was. Because dammit, I wanted whatever feeling it was. And thus the 9 people above because the passion I sought. So bless it, they needed to be here.
And there you have it, my top 10 ships! Hope you enjoyed! Feel free to add your own :)
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laithraihan · 3 days
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Would you be comfortable sharing any personal info (age, profession, relationship status, etc...)? Completely understand if you're not but it's always really interesting learning about the lives of ppl I admire. Again, if that's not something you wanna do it's totally understandable! I love your art!!
Ah thank you so much 🫶 and sure I dont mind sharing some stuff but to be very honest Im not an interesting person, so I'm sorry in advance for disappointing you.
So I'm a woman (or something like that) even though I use a male pen name for art, Im 22 years old, 151cm (4'11"), the eldest daughter who has two teenage siblings who are both taller than me and make fun of me for being short. I do not have a profession and I do not go to school due to a disability I will not disclose. Im a lesbian engaged to a butch, we've been together for almost 4 years (our anniversary is in August)
My favorite season is winter because all the bugs are dead and I despise summer because the bugs are alive. Im also really scared of butterflies for some reason. Im scared of winged bugs in general. Ive never seen a cockroach in my life but I'd probably kill myself if I saw one. I really hate bugs. The winters are harsh here but I like walking outside when theres light snow falling at night. Im also a bit obsessed with Christmas lights but I dont celebrate Christmas, I dont follow any religion in general but my family is Muslim so Ive been raised with that. If I could just put Christmas lights in my room all year then I would do that. They look really pretty.
About my ethnicity I think everyone knows Im Algerian already, well Ive only been to Algeria once when I was like 8 years old so I dont really remember anything. All I know is that my uncle would keep telling my dad that I convinced him to stop smoking and that he's eternally grateful for that but I literally cannot remember what I did or said back then so I just pretended I knew what he was talking about. Anyway. Id like to go there again one day. I most likely will go soon in the future so it makes me happy to think about it.
My first language is French and Im somewhat fluent in English but it needs more work. Whenever I speak English I have to think harder about the words that come out of my mouth and I start saying things that dont make sense. But my pronunciation is good so other people just assume Im fluent. Also I understand Derja (Algerian Arabic) when people talk to me out loud but I cant form sentences and respond back so I just answer people in French. I know how to read Arabic script and I understand basic words but again I cant form sentences. As for Japanese I can only read Hiragana and Katakana and a bit of Kanji, and my understanding of the language is worse than Arabic, so I practice by translating Japanese song lyrics, reading news articles and talking with Japanese users online
Honestly I dunno what else to say, I dont really have any special skills or anything like that. Unless you count memorizing all the metro stations in Montreal but thats only because I had to use public transport all the time when I was a kid because my parents never felt like driving me to my appointments. At that point I probably visited every single station because I had to go to many random places. I dont have a drivers license but I prefer walking to places in general even though there are no stores near my neighborhood, but I think it's better for me because I get to walk more. I think I really like the idea of travelling in general but I dont have friends for that, my parents also wouldnt allow me to hang out with friends so it's a bit unfortunate
Oh and lately Ive been enjoying making eggs for some reason, I think Im good at doing that. But I only cook whenever Im hungry and I rarely feel hungry so I dont cook many eggs. I also dont like cleaning dishes so I avoid making huge meals in general. I dont really eat much in the first place but I still like food. I really like going to restaurants too. I just like going outside in general. I like listening to music and talking with people, normal stuff like that. Im running out of things to say so I'll probably just stop there.
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zoropookie · 2 days
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Imagine Venti dipping to another universe to do his silly little job and comes back to see how ScaraYn is doing on HHAB, gets jumpscared instead by their wedding scene or smt-/j
/srs 👉😎👉
You sat there, staring intently at the vanity mirror before you. Both in shock and half horror that you were actually getting married to the same person that you swore to destroy at the beginning of your career.
The reflection staring back at you was unrecognizable to you, but so familiar— your eyes squinting in disbelief, and your lips parted as if trying to gauge how realistic this was for you right now.
“Oh! You look pretty~” A soft female voice sang from the doorway as they came in. You had a feeling it was Ayaka from how unimposing she was, but your head was too scrambled to navigate that.
The room around you was a soft blur of white and pastel, a pointed scent of roses and lilies lingering in the room that started smelling staler and staler. The sunlight streaming through the huge windows casts a warm glow on the objects it touched, including your pristine wedding outfit.
It was all perfect, and yet even with the idyllic setting, you shook your head. “This wasn’t supposed to happen.”
Ayaka stopped tweaking your outfit to look at you, also frozen in place. “What?”
“I don’t know, I— I can’t.”
Ayaka gasped promptly, her eyes widenening as she left go of the fabric, leaning towards you to whisper to you just in case the walls were thin. “Really? Cold feet right now?!”
“Well, not exactly, but oh my fucking god. Every time stuff like this happens, I get major heart palpitations. I mean, who even agreed to it being this fast anyway? Why did it happen so quickly?” You rambled. “It had to be today?!”
“You set everything up! He let you do all of the scheduling because he knew that you’d get scared easily if it were any earlier!” Ayaka’s voice was hushed, in the same amount of panic as you. “Do you think you’ll be okay?”
As you were about to answer, the door busted open with a very violent force, Hu Tao who was adorned in the same violet dress that Ayaka was fitted in (it looked horrible on Hu Tao), stopped herself from skidding against the marble floor with her heel.
She came in with explosive pants and breath she didn’t even know if she was able to catch. You and Ayaka both looked at each other in confusion before turning your attentions back to her.
“Guys. Keep it cool when I say this, too.” Hu Tao took a final breath before panic struck again. “Venti’s here.”
“VENTI?!” You screamed. “He’s missing!”
“Yeah, no fucking idea. I was going to steal a cupcake from the snack bar because Lumine said she made too many and I see motherfucking VENTI just asleep…chilling behind the table. He’s out, like,” Hu Tao put her hands together and made a sleeping gesture. “When I poked him, he literally opened his eyes and said hey, and went back to sleep.”
Your jaw dropped. “What, he just goes missing for six years and then decides to just show up picking his ass? How did he even find out?”
“No way this is happening…okay, let’s just— (Y/N), you cannot go out there.” Ayaka stopped you from moving forward. “What if Kuni’s out there too?”
“Oh, shocker. He hasn’t seen me wear lingerie either, you think I’m scared? I’m sure there’s more surprises coming.” You said, and with that, you lurched out the door in search for the offending man.
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heretherebedork · 2 days
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Hi,
I have a question about your comments on Love Sea. Genuinely no hate, I’m just curious. Are you saying that, because we should have clear, enthusiastic consent 100% of the time in real life (which is obviously completely correct and I’m not disagreeing with that at all), we cannot/should not ever explore anything other than that in fiction? I’m not disagreeing that Mame romanticises a specific dynamic that includes ignoring ‘no’ in a way that would be completely wrong, immoral, and criminal, in real life, but this isn’t real life. If people enjoy that dynamic in fiction, and that is the dynamic Mame wants to write, and that viewers expect from her, isn’t that up to them? Even if they do also praise better representations of consent in other shows, isn’t it possible they enjoy seeing this dynamic explored, in fiction, but are also glad it’s not the only representation of consent out there and that there are also others that are closer to what would be appropriate in reality. It doesn’t have to be either/or, does it?
So. The answer to this is dear lord I didn't tag the show for a reason.
But also.
The answer to that is that sometimes it works. When Mut was carrying Rak into the sea and Rak was saying no and they were both laughing and it was fun and teasing? That was fine! That was a no that obviously wasn't meant as a serious no and was joking.
But when Mut was dragging him out to his motorbike and he was protesting the entire time and telling him he didn't want to go and didn't want to be there and to stop and Mut had to literally scare him to make him go with? That's not okay. Because that is literally takin g no means no and making it a joke.
The dynamic being explored here works in so many contexts without specifically making 'no means no' into a joke. There are so many ways that this kind of dynamic can work that doesn't have to specifically be 'man, isn't it romantic the way he ignored his no?'
I don't tag the show in my posts because I don't want to show up in the tag or bother people who enjoy this. I use specific tags to let people easily block my posts.
But the honest answer is that making it works and exploring the dynamic also includes acknowledging what you're exploring in the process. And neither MAME nor her fans are doing that. Typically fans write this off as romantic and sexy and not as anything they wouldn't want in real life. I've had people argue with me for literal pages about the diary reading scene in the Other Show and how it was so needed and romantic and just...
Look, I like codependency in fictional romances! It's not romantic in real life but I love it in fiction. It's one of my favorite tropes. I love Love Syndrome III and it's toxic as fuck. But that show knew it was toxic and fully embraced that it was toxic and didn't try to write that as the romance but rather as a fucked up relationship that was what the two leads wanted despite how toxic it was. And I loved it! A+!
The problem with exploring a dynamic without acknowledging that you're exploring the dynamic is that it turns no means no into a joke in the show and that's... that's just unpleasant.
People are free to explore things and enjoy things and I specifically don't tag my criticism with the show for that reason. But the problem is that people talk about how sexy all of this and enjoy it and will be very clear, just like MAME was last episode about 'people asked why characters do things' that what they want is... whatever that means, I guess?
I post criticism that is specifically tagged to let people avoid it because I want people to know what I think and that I do see these shows and can offer criticism but also that it's not for the fans of the show because it's specifically tagged for them to avoid.
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bee-named-alex · 2 days
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Ok so ep7 of iwtv s2. One of the notes i wrote down as i was watching was "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. nope. just nope. jesus fucking christ don't you dare do this" so you can imagine how i felt. Spoilers.
Ok ok. So I'm so fine rn you don't even know how fine I am. I didn't cry even though I expected to, I was more like empty, which might be even worse (read: better) lol
I'll start with a few quick thoughts, before I get into the bigger things. For the first like 10 minutes I couldn't stop thinking about how great Lestat (Sam) looks like im sorry. Him uncovering the homophobe's filth back at him? 10/10.
The actors are just so- perfect I have to say. Like we don't know what's true and I probably shouldn't believe anything just to be safe, but I found myself believing them everything. Also the whole time I wanted to hate the audience but they think it's just a play and if I, with all the other knowledge, find myself drawn to believe obvious lies, it's not really their fault that they do too.
Let's start with Lestat then. I was so glad to finally see the "real" (not really, even Sam said so) Lestat again
I haven't read the books (and even if i did i know that they change things) so idk how they made him testify because I just don't think he would. Maybe they tortured and forced him, "gave him a choice", maybe he was planning on saving them. Or maybe he just actually was out for vengeance i just don't know.
"You cannot script a hurricane" yeah you can't I loved that him going of script threw Santiago off so much, lmao (like he literally said "I'm about to violate the 5th law" aka kill Lestat I love that. Lestat is such a little shit.)
And when he went of script he told the truth (or as close to truth as we got during the trial i feel). Yes he also did break the laws. I like that he didn't let Santiago manipulate the audience to sympathize with him (don't get me wrong, it's not that he didn't want them to sympathize with him, he just wanted to manipulate them himself lol)
His and Louis' first eye contact (at around 11 minutes I believe) literally broke my heart.
When he talks about the loneliness I can't help but feel sorry for him.
I found it honestly hilarious when he was recounting their whole history backwards, like bitch please, it literally happened the other way arounf. Idk why it was just so funny how he was blatantly lying.
But then when they fully revisited the scenes from last season my jaw dropped.
So firstly Claudia's turning... I am so confused by it. Because it's obviously different from what we saw last time - and the scene itself is so moving. I mean Louis begging Lestat on his knees like he's some god and trying himself and failing and Lestat doing it for him even tho he knows it's a terrible idea. But the confusing part - in Dubai Louis rn says that Lestat's trial version is better than his and that he didn't want to believe it at the trial but now he knows it to be more true.
But like last season, so like 2 weeks ago, he told his own version?? Did he not realize until now, that he's talking about the trial, that he doesn't believe it? Did he lie on purpose but change his mind, is he lying now? Does Armand have to do something with it again? Tf is happening.
And then the fight. Again it's different but this time I remember that we didn't actually see this part of the fight so it could technically be true?? I don't really know rn how big of a part we didn't see last time. But maybe the truth about the fight is somewhere in the middle.
Amazing scene nonetheless, again, if I didn't know shit, I too would 100 % believe Lestat to be the victim. Up until the drop, that is extreme either way.
And Lestat going fully of script here, and his tears and his regret and his voice trembling and I'm sure that he means it. It wasn't a part of the performance. Sam Reid, the actor that he is, fuck.
It is just wo so great, like these new versions we get by Louis telling the story of Lestat showing him the story (which Louis already told us very differently) and on top of that anything could be misremembered. Or edited Armand. Unreliable narration at it's best.
Ok so Armand. "I could not prevent it" Fuck you. No sorry I might be a little harsh but yea no actually I'm not.
First the thing with Nicki and how he was "helped"... Armand got rid of him to have Lestat to himself and now he's doing the same with Claudia and Madeleine to have Louis.
Him having to watch is brutal and I believe his emotions but not his words. It was terrible to watch sure and painful and he didn't want it to happen... but he still sold them out?
He saves Louis. And it's amazing, the fear for his love in his face as he does it. He says it took all his strength and sure. But he could've saved them all. He can literally stop time. Ok maybe not but I for sure think he could've done it.
And rn in Dubai he's trying to convince himself or Louis or Daniel or maybe everyone that it wasn't his fault. But Daniel seems to not believe him (and calls his shit out a few times, good for him). And he's also making Lestat be more of a villain then he is I think (he would not do nothing when watching Claudia's death I'm sorry, that's his daughter.)
Claudia and Madeleine. My heart broke. They were doomed from the begginning. It didn't matter if they fought or not, it didn't matter their love or that they were right, it didn't matter that Madeleine was innocent and Claudia justified (maybe) in her crimes.
It didn't matter that Claudia was right -"We poisoned him, he's fine now. I can also cry and say I'm sorry"- because yes this was exactly true.
Claudia's final request (and Lestat giving it to her and then looking almost proud?? after she says it) and promise of death to all the people who doomed her and Madeleine.
And her rage. "It was never about me" and that's also true and yet she dies because of it. Tragic.
Madeleine's "My coven is Claudia" is just pure love and again it's what dooms her and again it's fucking tragic.
Watching the execution I couldn't breath really. Hurts still. And I don't believe Armand's version of the story though. Not that he tried but couldn't save them, not that Lestat didn't even try.
Louis, poor Louis. Living with guilt and sorrow isn't easy and he's living through it again now. And he can't even trust his own memories. I need him happy. He's not gonna be but I need him to be.
Also his live burial?? like fuck. That was vile. Like we know that he is fine now but still.
Previews. Santiago will die and if he doesn't I will kill him. Louis is a pyromaniac (yay), I'm ready for the whole coven to burn.
From the trailers we didn't yet see the bookshelves falling on Daniel so it has to be next episode. Also we didn't yet see the Loustat hug and I don't think it's what happens after the trial, especially not with Louis coming to kill Lestat, so that would mean it has to have happened later (Dubai maybe? I mean we do need Lestat's side of the story next season so we could get him now.)
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cottagecori · 2 months
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hey. send the message. do it.
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hum--hallelujah · 10 months
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don't want to kill time like it doesn't matter - 3.5k words, (platonic) funkobra hurt/comfort
---
Ghoul is actually younger than Kobra. They always forget it though.
At least, they usually do.
Kobra's stopped shooting upright and reaching for his blaster whenever someone wakes him up at night. Stopped two years ago, honestly, when him and Ghoul started sharing a room. That was a collective decision that is very much not discussed. It left the old office as a perfect room for the Girl, in the end. Between Ghoulie and Girlie, the former of whom has wild, sleepless tendencies and the latter liking to scramble her way into bed with somebody else every other night of the week, Kobra's knee-jerk reaction has become more of a lack of reaction.
"Yo," hisses a pitchy voice. It's dead daylight, the heat of the day. This is the time of the year when you sleep while the sun's up, wait until the darkness falls to do anything or else it's too miserable or too dangerous. "Kobes."
Kobra utters a verbose "Hrrmngg?" and rolls over. He cracks an eye open to see Ghoul standing at the end of his bed. If it hadn't been light out, he'd be doing a good job of living up to his name. His hands are shaking, but when aren't they?
"You good, man?" Kobra asks groggily. He's half awake, half asleep, drifting in between the two states of being. Ghoul is shifting his weight back and forth on his feet. It makes the floor creak. It makes him look even smaller than he is. "Ghoulie?" He mumbles again when he gets no reply.
Ghoul makes a noncommittal half-whispered sound. "Wanna go for a joyride?" He asks instead of an answer.
Kobra blinks himself more fully awake and pushes up on one elbow. "Mirage or the 'Am?"
Ghoulie shrugs. Won't meet his eyes. Oh shit, that's not good. Something's got him worked up. It's too late for this. This is why they share a room now. They didn't used to, but Kobra refuses to let him sleep alone anymore. Kobra knows how he got that wicked scar that runs from the corner of his mouth nearly to his eye.
"Either," Ghoul says. "Doesn't matter much to me."
"Mirage," Kobra decides. He'll never say no to a late-night joyride. Not this kind. Party'll have his neck for sneaking out on the bike without letting anyone know, but the 'Am is too conspicuous when strange crews are out and from the look of him, riding double on the motorcycle will be good for Ghoul.
It's still too hot to be out. But going for a spin won't take too much exertion, getting to someplace with shade, so long as it's away from here, won't take too long. Ghoul's gonna get sunscorched. Maybe that's the point. While Kobra covers up with his jacket, Ghoul is still in the loose, half-covering clothes he sleeps in.
The sun glints painfully off the sand when they climb quietly out the window. No reason trying to get past Party when they've got an exit right here. Ghoul clambers out first with a probably accidental but surprisingly graceful roll and then flinches, violently, when Kobra jacket catches on what's left of the glass in the window and he tumbles haphazardly to the ground. They both hold still for a long dozen seconds, Kobra staring at the diner wall and straining to tell if anyone heard them, and Ghoul staring at Kobra and shaking.
When Party doesn't come along, eyes glinting with annoyed amusement, and yell at them for sneaking out, Kobra sits up and checks the hem of his jacket where it caught on the sharp edge. "Great," he mutters when he sees the tear in the lining. He'll have to sew that back together later. "Ghoul, you good?"
Ghoul shrugs and stands up. "Aren't I always?"
"No."
They stare at each other for a few seconds while Kobra rubs his palms together to clear the sand off them and reaches into his pocket for his gloves. "You're wearing a helmet," he says flatly.
Ghoul rolls his eyes and sneers. It crinkles the scar running up his face. "No way."
"Fine." Kobra doesn't push. Half the time he doesn't even wear his helmet. He's the driver. He'll keep them safe. It was worth a try, though. "Come on."
The heavy bay door of the garage makes too much noise to open without being caught. They slip in the side door and Kobra brings Mirage carefully back through it. He wears a helmet this time. Ghoul stands and waits, bouncing impatiently on the balls of his feet, while Kobra starts the bike and, out of habit, does a couple checks.
"You ready?" Kobra says, with the visor of his helmet flipped up.
Ghoul grins, but it's lacking in heart. So often, Kobra thinks he's not all there. So often, Kobra thinks this is his best friend. "Born that way," he replies.
"Come on then," Kobra says and nods for Ghoul to get on the bike with him. "Hey, hey. Hey, Ghoulie-" he says, when Ghoul is standing right at his shoulder, about to throw a leg over Mirage and climb on. "You okay?" He asks again, because he needs to know how safe any of this is.
Ghoul doesn't respond. Just settles himself behind Kobra and wraps his arms, tight, around Kobra's middle. Kobra stays there a second, until he's sure Ghoul's grip is solid, so that he can feel Ghoul breathing against his back, before he kicks off. He doesn't care if Party and Jet wake up now, they won't catch them. The bike's tires kick up a fountain of sand as he spins a loop, leaning into the turn until Mirage tilts close enough to the ground that Kobra could touch the sand if he reached out. Ghoul asked for a joyride. This is that.
"What the hell, man?!" Ghoul yells over Kobra's shoulder, muffled by the engine noise and his helmet. Kobra feels Ghoul's hands grab at the fabric of his shirt as he pulls around the first turn, bringing them around the back of a sand dune at full speed.
"Trust me?" Kobra shouts back. He's getting into it now, relaxing into each wide, showy swerve and fishtail. He slows down just a bit when he can feel Ghoul's fingernails start to bite into his skin. It makes him edgy when Ghoul is like this.
Ghoul sniffs sharply. "Well, yeah, but I've seen you crash out enough times at the track-"
"Aw, shut up," Kobra snaps back, without venom. Ghoul's his mechanic. He's seen his best wins and worst losses. "Where you wanna go?" He asks, after a few random turns, just drifting around in the sand. Ghoul is quiet. Kobra reaches back with one hand and smacks him on the leg after awhile. "Ghoulie, where we goin'?"
"I'm thinki-" Ghoul cuts himself off and when he speaks again his voice is flat and so quiet Kobra has to strain to hear him. "Turn right up here."
There's the remains of a road cutting across their path and Kobra hops Mirage up onto it, swings right and follows the pavement. Ghoul's grip around his chest has loosened, but Kobra can feel the fast, shallow rhythm of his breathing and the shaking of his hands even still. The road goes on for ages, long enough that it starts to feel infinite. This must have been a highway, back before the wars and BL/ind. At some point, Ghoul leans forward and puts his forehead against the back of Kobra's neck. Kobra can feel him pressed just below where his helmet sits.
"Get off at this turn," Ghoul mumbles suddenly, but not soon enough because Kobra completely overshoots the exit. He flips around the empty lanes of the highway, admittedly showing off mostly just to make himself feel better.
The group of buildings along the former highway off-ramp isn't really a ghost town. It's a cluster of old stores and restaurants, like the diner but mass produced, and down at the end is an ancient truck stop and gas station. Kobra slows the bike to a crawl as they drive down the street, struck with an eerie sense of deja vu. He's been here before. They both have.
He pulls over and stops in the middle of the road, beside what used to be a coffee store. Coffee is usually made in the form of compressed, dried out shots now, called Motor Juice in the Zones when rehydrated. They don't have coffeeshops in the City. They have prescriptions.
Ghoul is off the bike and Kobra's back suddenly cold even under the heat of the sun before Mirage even comes to a full stop. "Ghoul-" Kobra snaps, angry for reasons he can't even say and unsettled in ways he doesn't want to. This is a ghost town. Just not in the normal way. "Ghoul. What are you-"
But Ghoul is walking away, his back to Kobra and the bike as he moves toward the gas station as if it's a magnet and he's the blade of a knife, trembling so hard with the pull that it might break. Kobra hesitates, then swings his leg over Mirage and bumps out the kickstand. Ghoul is standing stock still, or as still as he can, on the faded pavement of the gas station parking lot. Kobra's glad it's faded. He doesn't want to see the bloodstains.
Ghoul looks small as he approaches, absolutely miniscule. He's got his arms wrapped tight around himself and Kobra can hear the harshness of his breathing even from several strides away. He doesn't want to get too close too fast. Ghoul's enough like a wild animal that it could turn out badly, and Kobra for once really doesn't want to fight him today. Not out here, at least.
They're within two years of each other, Kobra and Ghoul. They usually forget they're not the same age. But right now Ghoul looks so small and so, so young and Kobra doesn't know what to do.
"Gh- Ghoul. Ghoulie." Kobra calls carefully, stumbling over his tongue. He clamps his teeth together, takes a deep breath. "Ghoul."
Ghoul doesn't turn, doesn't look away from the door into the gas station he'd been found in, back when Kobra and Poison and Jet were a crew of three and Ghoul'd been even more feral than he is now. The gas station where Ghoul watched his entire family die and he was helpless to do anything about it. He still thinks he hadn't done enough. Kobra knows that. Ghoul always thinks he didn't do enough. That one kid with a blaster and wild eyes could take down a full squad of Dracs and two Crows.
Kobra doesn't know how to tell him that if he'd tried, he would be dead too. Kobra doesn't know how to tell him he's glad he didn't. When it comes down to it most, Kobra finds he can't speak.
"Ghoulie," he says again. "Hey. Hey." He moves closer, pulls off the helmet he'd almost forgotten he still has on. "Ghoul," he tries, one more time, as gently as he knows how even though it's not that gentle. He's never been good at this. Some of the scars scattered across Ghoul's body are from him. But Kobra had stitched up Ghoul's face and he's not going to give up now.
Ghoul finally turns and Kobra breathes a sigh of relief. Just a response. Proof of life even though he's still standing. And then Ghoul steps toward him and suddenly he's right there, shaking but otherwise just as eerily still as this entire place, like he's trapped in frozen time just like the rest of it, and he collides with Kobra's chest in a way that's both surprising and yet entirely expected.
"Oh." Kobra drops his helmet, dangling from one hand, and his arms hover uncertainly in the air for a moment before he carefully closes them around Ghoul. "Oh. Okay. Okay." He says quietly, startled, but not really. He'd felt the way Ghoul was holding onto him as they rode Mirage all the way out here.
Ghoul unfolds his arms from around himself and grabs onto the unzipped sides of Kobra's jacket. He doesn't cry, not out loud at least. He's just shaking, so much, and so, so small. Kobra's not good with words. He's even worse with them under pressure. Anything Jet or Party could say to make it better, that kind of stuff gets stuck on his tongue when Kobra tries to say it. So he doesn't. He just holds on.
"You plan on coming here?" Kobra asks eventually, even though he has a feeling the answer is no. Unless it's an engine or a bomb, Ghoul never really plans on much. Ghoul shakes his head, hair scrubbing against Kobra's shoulder and neck where his head's pressed. "You wanna... y'wanna go inside?" He asks then, against his better judgment. But then again, he's never been known for that, has he.
Ghoul tenses, but it momentarily stops the shaking. "Can we?"
Kobra huffs. "Nobody stoppin' us, and even if there were, we'd do it anyway, wouldn't we?"
Ghoul pries his fingers from their hold on Kobra's jacket and turns back toward the station. "Should we?"
"Dunno." Part of him thinks it might help. Part of him remembers exactly what happened the last time they were here. It's the Killjoy way to call death ghosting. It means some part of you lives on even when you're gone. There's a lot of ghosts in this pavement. "It's your-"
He can't think of what word goes there. Choice. Past. Grief. Place. So he stops talking. He shrugs, bends to pick up his helmet. "I can." He sucks a breath through his teeth. He's going to say it again. "I can... I can go with you. If you," he shrugs one shoulder again. "If you, uh, want to. I'm not- I'm not trying to force you," he adds, like it needs to be said. "It's your... yours."
Because that's all that really can be said. This place, the place that made Fun Ghoul what he is. The journey, however brief, that brought them here. Even, kinda, Kobra himself. It's all for Ghoul, here and now. Kobra drove, but he's just along for the ride. Weird how that happens.
Ghoul steps toward the station. Magnetism, again. And Kobra follows, because how could he not. He feels sick at the though of letting his friend go in that place alone.
The doors are gone. Shot out years ago. It looks to Kobra exactly as it did back then, but Ghoul probably remembers better. There are shelves toppled and glass and plastic broken all over the floor. Whatever hasn't been scavenged is broken and shattered. Ghoul walks toward the back of the store, the corner that's not so much a mess. Kobra stays back a bit, trying to give his friend space.
It's where they found Ghoul. Or, where Pois had found him. Ghoul was half in shock, terrified and scarred and fighting, and Party was the first one of their then three-strong group to notice the dark shape watching them hopelessly trawl the carnage for any survivors. It took Pois physically restraining the much smaller kid to keep Ghoul from going for all of their throats.
Kobra has a lot of bad memories of Ghoul. None are as bad as remembering the way he'd screamed when they first met.
"Y'okay?" Kobra asks after a while.
Ghoul has his moments. They all do. Sometimes, you wake up bad in the night and it's hard to pick yourself up. Sometimes you just gotta hit the bottom before you even can. But Ghoul's a fighter. "Yeah," he says, walking back and forth between fallen shelves once stocked with food and stupid trinkets. He crouches to pick up the shattered remnants of something once made of colorful glass and when he looks back over his shoulder at Kobra, he doesn't seem quite as small.
"'M sorry," Kobra mumbles, not knowing what to say now. Somehow, the shaking and the touch are so much easier than having to talk about it. He's never been the talker. That's Party. And he knows his brother regrets not getting there — here — sooner that day, but there's a sick, selfish part of Kobra that's too glad to have Ghoul to want anything different. But really, it's all he can say. If there's remnants of bones that haven't been carried away by carrion-eaters, he doesn't want to see it.
Ghoul slowly stands up from his spot on the floor, staring intently at the broken knick-knack in his palm. It might have been a glass teddy bear, once, something a parent might grab up for a child waiting at home. It's partially shattered, though. Half of its cartoonish smiling face is gone. The heart shape it once held in its paws is cracked down the middle. Kobra isn't great with metaphors, but this is pretty fucking obvious.
"I didn't save them," Ghoul says quietly, his voice grating through the charged, silent air. "I didn't save her."
Something clicks into place. They all know that the crew he lost was Ghoul's real actual biological family. He's a sandpup. He was born and raised in the Zones. He doesn't talk about it much. Kobra's shocked he even came back here, let alone with anyone else. Ghoul doesn't talk about his family, but they've all figured for a while that he had a sibling. You can see it in how he treats the Girl.
"Your sister," Kobra says. It doesn't sound like so much of a question when he says it out loud, but he knows Ghoul will understand it as one.
Ghoul nods. "Yeah." He steps over some toppled displays, sun-bleached ads that used to be bright colored, and slips the shiny piece of broken glass into one of Kobra's pockets since he doesn't have any of his own. Kobra can already see the sunburn forming on his friend's shoulders and the tops of his knees. "She was like, eight."
That's all the more he says about it, but Kobra slips his hand into the pocket and runs his fingers over the broken glass toy still warm from Ghoul's hands, and hears the years of grief and bitterness in the few words. Ghoul's more talky than he is, but he's cagey, too. Kobra can hear him, though. He gets it. Doesn't mean he knows what to say, though.
"Shit," he spits. He wants to say I'm sorry again, but that feels fuckin cheap. He wants to say stop beating yourself up about it, but that sounds even stupider. "Fuck." Sometimes that's all he can say.
"Yeah," Ghoul replies. "Fuckin shit."
"Exactly," Kobra agrees, fiercely relieved that Ghoul gets all the shit he's trying to say. "Hey, uh. Y'know I'm-" He stumbles over the words, cringes at himself for the inability to get past a stupid two-letter word. "I'm glad I know you." He manages, as selfish as it sounds standing here in the ghosted wreckage where Ghoul's family was killed. But if that hadn't happened, they wouldn't be here now. They wouldn't be friends. And Kobra needs Ghoul to know he's glad that any suicide run to save his family failed. The pain sucks, but he's grateful for the outcome. He hopes Ghoul can understand that.
Ghoul doesn't reply. His acid green eyes bore straight into Kobra's for a few seconds while Kobra's heart hammers in his chest. Then he kicks at some dust and looks at the floor and shrugs. "Let's go, man. I don't wanna stay here."
"M'kay."
Kobra's almost tempted to reach out as they walk back out into the glaring sun, grab onto Ghoul like he's a ghost, too, and the light might evaporate him. But he doesn't. He can't.
He thinks the feeling of Ghoul hanging onto him as he steers Mirage away, back up the ramp to the road they came down in the first place, will make him feel better. It doesn't. Ghoul holds on much looser than he had on the way here, and it makes Kobra nervous. He wonders if he should have made him wear a helmet, and steers more carefully around the turns.
And then Ghoul adjusts his seat and throws one arm up over Kobra's shoulder, loosely hooking around his neck. He leans up forward and shouts, "C'mon, Kobes, let's play with it!" Like he's itching for the risk that a couple hours ago had had him holding on for dear life. Kobra's used to thinking his best friend isn't all there. But he's also familiar with the times he is. Sometimes, he forgets they're not the same age because Ghoul is so larger than life.
He tips his head to the side in acknowledgement, and punches the throttle. He even pulls a couple of tight, quick loops. He can't slide on the pavement the way he would on sand, but he can catch a little air when there's a thermal bump in the highway. Ghoul clutches onto him, but it's not scared. Something's cleared up in the gas station. Maybe it was closure. Hell if Kobra knows.
When they pull Mirage off the highway and the diner finally comes back into view, just a small glint of signage, Kobra slows his pace and can feel Ghoul sigh more than he can hear it. His friend's arms stay firmly around him. "Hey, Kobes?" Ghoul says, just barely loud enough to be heard over the engine.
"Yeah?" Kobra says, a bit louder to be heard past his helmet.
Ghoul hesitates, then says in a rush, "I'm glad I know you too. Like, really glad." And then he squeezes Kobra a little tighter for just a second and Kobra can't even say anything in reply. It's been a long night at the wrong time of day. And they're almost home.
#yes I know kobra is doing that annoying ''r u ok'' thing very repetitively he's like me he repeats himself A LOT it's ok. we still love him#I cannot express this enough. kobra has a stutter. literally sometimes the only word that will come out is just. F bomb.#the others have gotten very good at translating him skskskddkfj#btw wrt kobra's speech patterns just know I'm cutting WAY back on the amount of repeating I do irl#like I'm giving him my (mild) stutter but cutting down the repetitions by a lot bc it looks weird on paper#so whenever he's repeating himself and stammering? yeah it's a lot more like a scratched CD than how I typed it out#in my head it's like SUPER noticeable. like everyone knows this happens and that sometimes he has to stop and be quiet#and take a minute before he can get on with what he's saying. it's just a thing#ok now that I'm done rambling about kobra kid having a stutter- :)#btw they're like 16 and 17 here. they are children trying to navigate these very big emotions and I love them so so dearly#next time I need to emotionally or physically hurt kobra skfjfnskdn I keep going after poor ghoul#ok I think that's all I have to say for now#she speaks!#she writes!#danger days#the true lives of the fabulous killjoys#danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys#ttlotfk#kobra kid#fun ghoul#this isn't really funkobra just bc I don't actually ship ANYONE here skskfjdghkdjgfkd#I'm much more compelled by platonic relationships that are kinda the Secret Third Thing than I am by romance. so. yeah
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fluxweeed · 1 month
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hey. hope this message doesn't bother you. I love you. I love your work. you are one of my favorite fic authors, I am absolutely obsessed with everything you write. reread everything ten times over, drarry or not, fluffy or angsty - even when it absolutely shatters my heart (e.g. for lack of wanting, SUCH a great fic btw i'm so obsessed with it). the four doors? life changing. two to lie and one to listen? engraved into my brain for eternity. what's mine is yours? what a ride holy shit, im VERY normal about it. wrapped? my comfort read. and so it goes.
if I could aggressively smother you with kudos and love I WOULD!!!
awhile ago you said that there's no such thing as "big deals" in fandom and I 100% agree but at the same time you are a big deal TO ME!!! not in the sense of any kind of hierarchy but purely based on the fact that I think you are such a cool person and your writing is amazing and poignant and your presence in fandom makes it so much better. it's been a pleasure following you here on tumblr and just reading your tags and posts.
idk I just think you rule. that's it. thank you for hanging with us. MWAH 💛
ahhhh anon sorry for leaving this message sitting in my inbox for a couple of days but !! i have zero idea how to react to this!! you're so kind!! thank you!! please discard any and all inclinations u have that i am a cool person bc i can assure you i am NOT!!
#tumblr tag essay time? tumblr tag essay time#why can't i do this in the main body of a post u ask? pure obnoxiousness ig idk#scarier when it's not greyed out and in a little whisper innit#1) anon i love and appreciate you + your kind words so so much but i rly cannot stress enough that literally nobody here is a big deal 😭#like i know u don't mean it in That Way but even so!!!#this is a hill i could write another 1k words about before i die on it again but i will spare u 😅#2) ur also v v kind to say the thing abt my presence in fandom#but unfortunately i'm coming to terms with the fact that my presence in fandom is v much on the sidelines#a non-presence#i'm embracing my role as the crotchety old hag who does not attend the functions#i have a hut in the woods and u can find me there (here in tumblr tags) muttering to myself#occasionally i'll wander into the town square (ao3) and present an unnerving thing i made from mud and twigs (a fic) and then i'll fuck off#that's about all i can handle in terms of group settings i think 😅#but the door to my hut (my DMs) is always open if u want to stop by!#3) i can't even begin to acknowledge all the nice things u said about my fics kjhsdf you are truly too generous 😭#let me smother YOU with love!!! cmere!!!#4) this is the second nice anon message i've had in the last couple weeks which is !!!!#anon(s) i'm kissing you wherever u consent to be kissed!!!#but ofc now i'm paranoid ppl will think i'm sending these to myself skdljf#can't stress enough how open my DMs are on here/twt/discord if ever u wanna chat in a way that i don't have to post publicly to reply to 😅#5) i'm soooo sorry about these tags#could have just said “thanks!” couldn't i#please put me right in the bin#anyway sorry again thank you again ilu very much ❤️
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philosophicallie · 28 days
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ok time to try to blame someone else instead of me
#being dramatic but idk im also trying to think abt why i am this way#in part to the fact that i inherently view myself as a burden and always have since a child since i could like. comprehend the things my mom#was going through for my life & moving the america etc etc#but like yeah i was basically as independent as couldve been in the PH bc i had multiple ppl who could take me places and take care of me#but in the US it was just my parents and our family and our X amnt of cars#idk i just keep thinking about how much i miss doing anything in my life and how i used to be a dancer a martial artist a potter like#there was so much to me and now because i refuse to learn to drive and get a car i just. am locked out of everything#bc my aspirations cant work out on 1 vehicle in sparse & spread ohio#like idk maybe its the fact that i always was just like im not allowed to have friends im not allowed to go out in the summer#im not allowed to visit friends or extra places or events#never really been independent until i basically ran away and even now im just#only partially independent bc sure i have money and i have my own space but. im dependent on a driver and other ppls schedules and it just#idk i cant not see myself as a burden all i can think of is that im not a good enough woman let alone wife and thats something no one wants#like i barely know how to cook i barely eat i dont clean i barely wash i barely provide like. yeah idk also ever since i had a breakdown#i feel fundamentally just. changed especially about food. and idk i have been asking for others to cook for me more but i still am waiting 4#the next time someone says you can make it yourself and i starve for the next 24 hours#idk dude i literally cannot see myself as not a work of labor. its all mama ever ranted at me about. very verbally very constantly up until#i stopped being difficult with her being the head of the family of like 12#whatever. whatever#im done blaming someone else im gonna eat my words with regret and shame :/
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lovelaceisntdead · 1 year
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Listening to the Cranberries and feeling unwell about Van Palmer no one talk to me
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anaalnathrakhs · 3 months
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it's rlly fun how my parents just straight up. do not care. about the disordered eating. we had all this talk back when i went through a big suicidal crisis a couple months ago, i explained what was really difficult for me, eating socially, restaurants, not choosing my food, etc, and now it's like. okay it didn't exist actually.
mother i am not going to order you around, either you accept that i'm gonna have difficulty dealing with "normal people behavior" or whatnot and you stop looking at me like :/ anytime i am anything but ecstatic at the idea of eating anything anytime anyhow, or you adapt your behavior to avoid the results you don't like to see. i'm only doing my best to handle things from my side, and i am certainly not going to try measuring for you how important family social eating occurences are to you.
#''we should talk abt it uwu'' WE TALKED ABOUT IT. STOP COMPLAINING THAT DOING STUFF THAT I CAN'T EASILY HANDLE MAKES ME WEIRD.#EITHER YOU ASSUME IT'S GOING TO MAKE ME WEIRD BECAUSE YOU KNOW EXACTLY HOW AND WHY#OR YOU STOP DOING IT IF IT'S SO UWU HEARTBREAKING UWU FOR YOU TO WATCH#i'm not happy about how guilty i am too of that specific brand of ''oh this is so sad *continues doing nothing*'' form of ''compassion''#they just want me to perform anorexia recovery for them#so they can feel okay we're doing a good job at raising a normal child#they don't give a shit as long as the compusive eating is my mom's meal at the dinner table#just like they didnt care when i had roughly the same problems but not as bad before i had a restrictive phase#i cannot compromise because then WHAT im just hurting my parents for a situation that doesnt make me any happier either?#i do not want to live with them. i do not want to go place or do activities with them.#i dont want to talk to them most of the time and im perfectly willing to handle the times it could be cool to.#but it's really hard to start developping a life of your own when you first of all need like two weeks of total life-reset#quiet at home#and ''at home'' there's your parents who will simply not stop trying to pull you into going random bullshit places#and i can't say no. because the places ARE interesting and time-limited. and it makes them happy. and what am i gonna do anyway?#keep doing nothing on the computer and wait for them to come back to keep doing only the shittiest parts of this unsatisfactory routine?#try to do some work in the house or go out. for them to see that something happened?#i dont know how to live like a normal person#literally not once in my life have i been able to think ''oh i need to do X'' and then just. do X. prepare what's necessary for doing X.#go out and do X. i have to keep stuck at this computer or in this room or with this book.#because there is a million different obstacles to every single thing i'm trying to achieve and half of them are parents-shaped.#everything hurts holy shit#broadcasting my misery#vent#ed tw
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faineant-girl · 10 months
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i wish all addicts, in recovery or not, a life free of sorrow forever
#.vent#kinda. im not gonna delete this one though#i just. i sure am thinking about this a lot.#i listen to like. trip report videos or whatever and like. the comments section on every single one. just nasty#theres no sympathy for an addict to be seen. unless they're also an addict or are recovering#my dad is a recovered addict. hes been clean for 6 years. i love my dad and hes a wonderful person.#i obviously still have trauma from when he was actively in his mess. to deny that addicts have caused others trauma is to be reductive.#addicts can cause trauma because theyre people. and people can cause trauma all the same#but the lack of understand or care or basic respect to anyone dealing with addiction is just. appalling.#im sick and tired of hearing the same old fucking phrase that its the addicts fault cuz they decided to take the first hit. like#man how fucking cruel can you be. how heartless ya know.#like its obvious hardly anyone commenting abiut this knows anything about what being an addict is like. like.#i know i dont. ive been sober my whole life right. i do not have the same experience.#but. i have a compulsive disorder that makes me perform a task that is 1 harmful 2 almost entirely out of my control#and i cannot describe to you how difficult it is to ignore that urge. for your mind to know what youre doing is harmful. but#your body physically is not listening to you.#like. its a different thing when its addiction. but being compelled to do something you know is hurting you isnt unfamiliar to me#plus with addiction the added factor that your body becomes physically dependent on a drug and it hurts you for a long ass time to try and#stop and withdrawl can sometimes literally be lethal. its so fucking sad to see people hold not even. like an ounce of sympathy ya know#if an addict has abused you im not saying you need to forgive them. you dont. but not every addict is youre abuser#and while you do not need to be involved. every addict deserves a good life. everyone deserves a chance.#just. god. makes me mad. makes me upset.#if you are an addict especially if youre not in recovery. i hope your days go well. i hope the world gets kinder to you.
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etcnnante · 1 year
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an absolutely insane time of night to be upset about polnareff and his fate. why did araki do him like that
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