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#i know it is late but i tried my best
stil-lindigo · 6 months
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I can't properly put into words the amount of disgust that I feel seeing someone who looks like she could be my cousin fight for a genocidal occupational force like Israel but I will say this.
If you are Chinese, Korean, Japanese or any one of these Asian ethnicities that the West deem "acceptable" and you align yourselves with western-backed racial supremacy, you are making fools of yourselves. You have fallen prey to the myth of the "model minority" and you are suckers for it.
The premise of racial supremacy is based on exclusivity. And here's a dose of reality - the myth of the "model minority" is nothing but a tactic to placate you. To sow divide in the ranks of people of colour. To artificially manufacture another realm of racial supremacy in minorities so that you're distracted from how we all suffer under colonialism.
Did we all forget about the skyrocketing of sinophobia in the wake of the first COVID outbreak? The transformation of Chinese people into fiends with barbaric eating customs, poor hygiene, and mass conspiracy to infect the world with biological weapons?
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What about the hate-crimes? The attacks in the street against anyone visibly asian? The rampant discrimination and ostracisation from society?
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In 2020, Donald Trump referred to COVID-19 as "The Chinese Virus", "Kung-flu" at a campaign rally to raucous applause, a chilling echo of the times where fears of the "Yellow Peril" had the western world in a stranglehold.
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For all that Chinese people have been lauded as "prodigies" and "well-mannered workers", the moment our existence was incovenient, were were nothing more than another target. And although Chinese suffering then wasn't close to the scale of suffering that Palestinians now endure, we all received a reminder on what it was like to be in the world's crosshairs.
Now, in 2023, Biden dismisses death tolls as unreliable and remains proudly Zionist even after Netanyahu described the genocide Israel is inflicting upon Palestine as the "struggle between the children of light and the children of darkness, between humanity and the law of the jungle." At the same time, Palestinians are being compared to fleeing rats in a gesture of dehumanisation that mirrors how the Nazis portrayed Jews during the Holocaust.
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And let's not think Abigail's Jewishness will save her, not when it's been proven that Israel has administered contraceptives to Ethiopian Jewish immigrants without their consent. Racial supremacy is an exclusive club that never stops getting smaller, and there is nothing that you, as a minority, will ever be able to do to fit in. One day, you too will be a target and there'll be nothing you can do but blame yourself. After all - it's already happened.
So shame on Abigail. Truly. With the memory of knowing what it's like to be targeted for factors out of your control fresh in her mind, she happily fights to do the same to others. And that says more about her than I ever will be able to.
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chalkscrub · 9 months
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babygirl doodles from a little while ago
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ywpd-translations · 5 months
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Ride 755: Departure 2
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Pag 1
2: Ding ding
3: The boarding the flight number 621 to Fukuoka, departing at 10:30 will close soon
4: If you're boarding, please speak to the staff member closest to you
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Pag 2
2: Ah, that guy is angry
Shh
3: Oi
4: He said “I'm coming”, right?
Yessir!! I called him thirty times but he only picked up once....
He just said “soon”....
5: Then why aren't you here, Manamii!!
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Pag 3
1: There's the Inter High soon, the Inter High!! Buah!!
So-sorry, I even sent many messages, but his current location-
It's been more than thirty minutes since you've said that, how's that soon!?
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Pag 4
1: “Arriving late is a crime”!!
“Causing troubles is a serious crime”!!
Yessir
We told him that, too!!
3: Alright, I put Manami's ticket there, let's go
Huh!? Next to the window!?
That's a little-
Enough
4: Let's go, Yuuto, Tobirama
This time we'll fight as five people in the Inter High
'lright
Yes
No, but, he's the captain!?
Can't be
5: Ah... this must be my ticket
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Pag 5
1: Kyushu
3: Take me there, too!!
4: Waaaa, Manami-saan!!
I'm so glad you came!!
Thank you so much!!
Well...
You really are like an here who arrives in the moment of need!!
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Pag 6
1: Oi, don't misunderstand!! We were the ones in a pinch and this guy was the culprit!!
Yessir!
Sorry!
Ah, you exposed me...
2: Don't think you can dodge the matter of your tardiness just with your mood and cute face!!
Ah I thought I could make it
3: So?
Why... why were you late?
4: Ahh, I forgot my passport, then I remembered and turned back to get it
5: Ohhh... that's a problem indeed...
Wait!! You don't need a passport to go to Kyushu, right!?
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Pag 7
1: Woah!! That was a clever excuse, Manami-san (It was so cool!)
It wasn't clever, and now let's go!!
Did you doze off?
2: Mh...? Well, on the train... it was only one stop?
So he really slept too much...?!
3: Jou-kun and Yuzukoshi-kun went on ahead?
4: They went there with yesterday's flight
Huh!
5: So, when you said “passport”, earlier- what was it, really?
6: Did you really turned back to go get something?
7: Mhh, how should I put it
8: In order to fulfill the final promise....
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Pag 8
1: “The final promise”?
It was
3: a necessary piece
4: You're still wearing that ridiculous hat, Manami?
Ah... it's the one Ashikiba-san wanted last year... (Yuuto)
This is for exclusive use during the Inter High
Ohh... “exclusive use”, cool (Tobirama)
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Pag 9
2: Kyoto... Kyoto...
7: Small fries!!
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Pag 10
1: Then, should we go?
Are you...
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Pag 11
1: finally ready?!
2: Yes....!!
3: Mi!!
6: This year's victory will be ours
Our long-awaited victory
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Pag 12
1: It's checkmate!!
2: They're coming!!
3: They're coming!! One by one, to this land of Kyushu!!
4: Won't it favour us!? It's our hometown – us, Kumamoto Daichi!!
#yowamushi pedal#yowamushi pedal translations#yowapeda#yowapeda manga#yowamushi pedal manga#yowamushi pedal spoilers#ride 755#another short chapter i really hope sensei is okay!!#I dont mind the short chap at all (especially bc lately ive had little time to translate) but im kinda worried :')#This chapter was so asdhsdfksdg Manamiiiii you absolute disaster#who would have thought that the responsible one in this team would end up being doubash huh#now that's the surprising thing lmao#manami really went back to get the best boy cap i cant with him#btw i dont remember; does he know that the one who gave him the cap is onoda's mum?? how does he know#'i went back bc i had forgotten my passport' 'you dont need a passport to go to kyushu!?!?!?' ashdkasdfs well at lest he tried lmao#also 'Yuzukoshi-kun'??? is he the other hakogaku member?? :eyes emoji:#cant wait to see what other weirdo hakogaku will have this year#i think this year's hakogaku is the weirdest one - which is a lot tbh#i feel like its going to be my fave hakogaku team#btw doubashi wanting to leave manami behind and just run as five assdgfkdfgs hes right and tbh he should just do just that whenever manami#doesnt show up - 'well i guess we're a five people team from now on'#btw i love i we saw everyone! only kiji's team is missing#(maybe theyll shop up next chapter who knows wanatabe loves kiji enough that it wouldnt surprise me)#midosuji shows up for exactly one panel and hes already creepy af i love him#cant wait to get to know the new guy!!#and hiroshima!!!! cant wait to see them try so hard and then get defeated in the most pathetic ways like every year#i love them i cant wait to see what kind of weirdo higashimura has become#he was kinda normal last year but we cant have a normal person as the hiroshima captain lrb#and then theres kumadai#acting all important and then we all know theyll do absolutely nothing ajsgfksadf
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trickstarbrave · 1 year
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a king enjoying a relaxing bath
i dont have anything else i just wanted to draw my sweet nerevar taking a bath fsr. pls enjoy proof i can in fact do backgrounds if i am forced to (to varying degrees of success)
bonus:
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singsweetmelodies · 4 months
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you filling my cup (the sun coming up)
Pierre grips the phone hard enough that the plastic case cuts into his fingers. “You're telling me that if Charles doesn't get knotted soon, he could – he could literally die?” Suddenly, the sheer panic in Joris’ voice makes sense. “Why the hell haven't you gotten him to an alpha already?!” Pierre half-yells down the line. “That's the thing,” Joris says, and he sounds more stressed than ever. “He's only asking for you.”
The one where Charles’ drink gets spiked with the omegaverse version of a fuck-or-die drug. (Pierre helps.)
Written for the inimitable @hourcat - happy (very belated) birthday, my love <333
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hauntingblue · 2 months
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making a collection
making another collection with a threatening aura
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#davy back fightbpart 3 letsgo#HOW do the three big guns get wasted on the eating contest... horrible plan.... luffy is fine bc well... but not sanji and zoro like damn.#luffy DOESNT WANNA EAT??? CALL THE NAVY!!!!#what was i saying.... bad idea putting the three beasts there#FRANKY FRANKY FRANKY!!!! they captured the two princesses :(#one sided beef squashed between luffy and foxy. friendship ended with random ex marine guy. now luffy is my best friend#usopp and franky bonding time hell yeah. throw usopp by the head once more pelase#nami with zoros swords just like holding them looks so cool like she should get a few swords too... nami three sword style oda drawing pls#i think this man underestimates nami and luffys power together he doesnt know about shiki#luffy saying he knows its a trap and sorry for being late.... lets go on an adventure all nine of us.... usopp yes anding his lie..... omg#cant believe nami isnt there yet. she could take this guy. oh there she is!!!!! she does look cool with the swords and jumping to get luffy#zoro screaming in agony from luffy getting shot omg THIS FUCKING GUY OF COURSE!!! this looks like its so over#zoro and sanji must feel so useless rn. they didnt even get the chance to fight like damn#komei-kakka??? more like come caca. boom#luffy face down dead on the floor akdjkaa chopper have you tried looking at the wound to see if it harmed him idk#it hit the face akdjskn usopp that was coom also#was robin flirting with the other guy and zoro caught her and she told hum to shut up???#'your friends got the best of me but you are still in my arms an-' 'HEAT EGG!! ALSO YOU'RE ON FIRE!'#flare maneauver that was so slay also luffy and nami in the same frame so twins of them. my children. birthed them one right after the othe#zoro and sanji fighting back to back. back to back to back to you i dont wanna fall right back to us maybe you should run right back to her#that is such a bop song. also post wano zosan. and post wci. see the recurrent theme#fighting in water.... being on top of the sword that was a slay... red hawk ace i will never forget you it seems#foxy liking his jolly roger omg nami fooled him ahdhsjs i think they should have pirate game event every year they yearn for contests#now since this experience foxy should make monthly multitudinary pirate games olympics hoping the strawhats join them a la gatsby#the faces at the mushroom akdhaksjs#talking tag#watching one piece#watching one piece movies#kinda loved how robin betted on franky against usopp.... i will take the crumbs
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hwanswerland · 1 year
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ATEEZ @ MAMA 2020 (Inception + Answer) ↳ aka my second Atinyversary 
Summary in case you don't want to read all this: it's been two years since I got into Ateez, I ramble about it, then I tagged my lovely mutuals. I can't believe it's already been two years since Youtube recommended me this video out of the blue and because I was bored and San and Honjoong looked sp pretty on the thumbnail I watched it. Instantly fell in love with Answer and decided that well, if they have one song this good, there have got to be more right? And so began my descent into the kpop (read: Ateez) madness. I didn't expect on December 6th 2020 that two years later I would run a tumblr blog dedicated to the one guy that I actively did not want to bias at first, spend who knows how much money on albums and other merch, go to one of their concerts and scream along with all those other fans despite me thinking I would never have a boy group phase in this life (lol), least of all one starting when I was 21 years old. Not that I regret anything about it :D I realise that these gifs are not actually the most giffable moment for some members, but as this is a very self indulgent set I chose to gif what are moments I still remember reacting to when I saw the first time. Honorary mention to Hongjoong shouting "1, 2, 3 lets BURN" into his mic. If I could gif a sound that would be the first I'd gif because Answer is special to me and I absolutely came to life when he did the same thing at my concert. I started giffing on this blog way later in 2021, around the end of Deja Vu promotions, and for the most part I did not feel very welcome here on Atinyblr lol, for reasons that have nothing to do with anyone I interact with these days. This only very recently changed when I finally joined the atzsource team and actually talked to the people on here. So thank you for being so cool and talking about some things that mean I can finally chill and not feel like an imposter on here anymore. So in no particular order tagging my lovely mutuals that I love seeing on the dash/talking to/admire from afar ♡
@sanchelinz (thank you forever for the file!) @woosansang @jonghho @jeong-yunhoes @jjongho​ @sanhwaiting @woosanhui @jngif @guerrila @yunhogifs @applejongho @xuseokgyu @blueberrysan @jeongyunho99 @chwejongho @strhwaberries @cruellajoong @song-mingi @hwatermelon @seonghwaminho @yukuz
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kinokoshoujoart · 3 days
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silly devouring his salad
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some time ago i made this little drawing of baby... she deserves the recognition!! 
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liquidstar · 2 months
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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ratguy-nico · 5 months
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2# Father of the Bob
And this is a perfect example of a great episode beyond a holiday special episode (I didn’t even realized that it was a christmas special until I read the series wiki)
The episode gets me since minute one. Since the very first scene I knew this episode would be it. And is just that this first scene is devastating, seeing how Big Bob demerit Bob’s efforts and ideas, he doesn’t even take a moment to think about how this hurts Bob, it’s not important, is not a moment that would mark Bob for life, is just another day. It makes me sick.
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Then I saw the 15 minutes rule, and it reminded me so much of my own relationship with my grandma that Big Bob became immediately a villain in my head, some hurtful man who didn’t care about his son, but oh boy if I was wrong.
Big Bob is not a villain, is not a bad man, he’s just a very imperfect dad. Because yeah (for me) Big Bob is not a good dad, not a bad dad either, and I get this for others episodes as well.
Big Bob wasn’t a great dad, he loves Bob of course, but he also hurt him deeply over the years and since a young age, but how the serie deal with this is what amazed me. Big Bob in this moment of his life, where he thinks he already lost his son, is still trying to change, which is huge for me.
Big Bob, even if at first didn't wanted to admit it, understand why Junior go, why they couldn’t work together and finally recognize that he made things in the wrong way, and he is indeed trying to change and be more accesible and communicative, we see more of this in further episodes. But he doesn’t do this expecting for Bob to go back, he does it because is the right thing to do, is what needs to be done.
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I’m not trying to say Bob wasn’t also in the wrong, cause he was, but he’s the one to extend the branch of olive and he does it in the best way possible.
Who knew this man could actually communicate his feelings in such an on point way. Damn.
And know that we are in this scene and I have to clarify this next part is my brain looking too deep into things. (pls bare with me)
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For me this whole scene in Pete’s Gay Bar alludes not only to Bob’s burgers ideas or him running away from Big Bob's Dinner, but is also about his sexuality (and maybe even his autism).
Bob can not believe his father is just so comfortable in this kind of place, surrounding by people that are just like Bob, this parts that Bob always thought his father couldn’t accept, this parts of him he couldn’t even voice out loud himself. Cause in this scene is obvious they both know, but they just don't talk about it. Bob assumes Big Bob will never accept it and Big Bob try to not mention it cause he doesn’t get it, but he wants to get it, want to understand, but he doesn’t tell Junior any of this, maybe under the assumption that Junior doesn’t even care cause it just too late.
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The line “You have weird and happy kids” broke me. Big Bob knows as well as Bob that the kids are different, neurodivergent, but don’t have the knowledge to refer properly about it. Big Bob accepting the fact that the kids are weird but still amazing and, most important, happy as they are, close the circle of him rejecting his son in the past for being weird and ungrateful (not happy) and for the cherish on the top he says “You are a good dad” cause yeah Bob is certainly doing it better than him at the past.
I really love this episode so much, maybe even more that the actual Top 1 but for now here it is. Is a complex episode, that I could see over and over and still think more about it.
EXTRAS
I love how passive-aggressive Linda is with Big Bob, she really wants for him and Bob to have a good relationship and she forced as she does with her own parents. But in this and other episodes is clear that she doesn't forgive Big Bob for all the things he put Bob trough.
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The kids are the glue on the episode. With their innocence and naivety in the matter they get to bring the family together. They don’t get why their dad doesn't like Pop Pop but they don’t really care, they like their Grandpa and that’s what matters.
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I kind of ship Big Bob and Pete, there it is I said it. Leave me alone. This destroy all my discourse but I just love the idea of Big Bob finding love again and in this man that obviously support him and like him the way he is, they get each other. Shut Up! leave alone.
Oh and "Baby You Can Chive My Car Burger" is so special to me, I'm just waiting for the right moment to cook it, is like one of my dreams in real life.
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bumblingbabooshka · 11 months
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Ok. Get closer why don’t you.
#Chakotay opens the door to Janeway's ready room and the two of them are literally in each other's laps#but they're talking very seriously about work business and seem unperturbed by Chakotay's entrance#<- my ideal (bc I think it's funny)#Chakotay: What are you and Tuvok to each other?#Janeway: ?? He's one of my dearest friends and most valuable officers.#Chakotay: Right. No..it's just that I saw you kiss his hand the other day? As if pledging loyalty to a monarch but more tender than that -#there was a glitter in your eyes like love but to call it 'love' would cheapen it so you leave it unnamed? I just saw that and was curious.#Janeway: That's just a friend thing v_v are we on for dinner?#Chakotay: Sure (later) Hey Tuvok what is Janeway to you?#Tuvok: She is one of the greatest individuals I have ever had the honor of knowing - someone I consider a friend - family -#and a piece of my very soul can be found within her. Why?#Chakotay: Aren't you married?#Tuvok: -equivalent of sighing- it isn't romantic. (right. yeah of course.)#<- my ideal (bc I think it's hilarious)#It isn't romantic Chakotay my God...Have you read any poetry lately? Once you get 1000 hours into ancient poetry THEN maybe you'll get#what's going on#Also sidenote this crew is fucking doomed mental health wise HEHEHE they tried therapy ONCE (after trying 'literally just erase the trauma')#and the therapist FELL ASLEEP#I love these bastards HEHEHEHE#Janeway: Doctor I'm going to do my best to help you...I allowed you to evolve into a being greater than a mere hologram and I owe it to you#to let youzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzsnorkmimimimi#tuvok cam
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whumpy-wyrms · 5 months
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sorry for not being super active i’ve been busy slaying princesses :3
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dawntheduckrb · 6 months
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I'll stop posting wips eventually but it's been five days since I've said anything and I don't want anyone to think I'm dead/dying/stuck in a ditch and withering away, so here's 10% of the reason I disappeared (the duck is stuck in rendering hell) (and my little baby laptop is screaming at me every time I open up this file)
I might still be mostly lurking for a little bit so please be patient with me in the meantime 🙏🙏
#seriously though I'm sorry for just up and disappearing like that#wanna talk to people and interact with them so bad lately but I just can't bring myself to do it#so the best i can manage is blabbing in the tags like always#i don't know wtf is going on but over the past few days I've just felt like i don't deserve to talk to anyone#tried to reblog posts from mutuals several times but something in my head keeps saying;#'yeah they don't actually care for your input at all and you're being a bother for even trying etc etc'#and i know deep down that's probably not true (i hope) but i can't reason it away you know#and i know the best solution to this is to just talk to someone#let it be known that i *did* make an attempt to#i tried texting someone (and succeeded) but i couldn't keep doing it and I'm back at square one (and now feel worse lmao)#i'm not really putting this here for anybody to see it as much as i am for myself#but i know that (hypothetically) this could be seen by a real human so it still kinda feels like I'm reaching out in a way which feels nice#makes me feel less like I'm shriveling up in my own self imposed solitude#so uh hello person who might be reading the tags (there's six of you guys here now which is crazy cause i post nothing but junk here lol)#((but thanks anyway for following and even more thanks for reading this if you did))#i'll make my way around all the posts i missed soon enough don't worry#i'm sorry i'm really not meaning to ignore anybody#i have drafted quite a few posts from moots that i couldn't finish leaving comments on but i have seen them#everyone here is super cool and talented as always <3 whether that be through art or writing or just finding neat posts to share#this wall of text is long enough and i'm very eeby so thank you again for reading this#tldr; not dead and i'll be okay eventually :)#not rb#hey look i didn't post a picture of my dog this time (a crime)#i'll make sure to share one the next time i get a good one
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zorilleerrant · 10 months
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"Everyone's gay awakening was Nightwing," Bernard repeats, like Tim didn't hear him the first fucking time and, okay, back before they were brothers obviously attractive was a descriptor he would've used about Dick Grayson (he can't see it anymore, especially not until Dick stops sending him autotuned videos of people's pets when he said he was busy this week) but it was a couple years before he really thought about that kind of stuff, as much time as he even has to think about it now, and by then they were friends, at least, and it was weird just like it was back in high school.
Oh. He did like Bernard in high school. But it was all in the way of their friendship if it went wrong, just like with Steph, except Steph had a way of convincing him to take he leap, because she's an optimist like that. With Bernard, he needed enough space to figure it out himself, which, well, that was a journey, anyway, not that Tim's ever been very good at introspection. But, like, look at his family - both of them, really - and see where he would've had any examples set for him, so Tim is doing pretty well all things considered.
But the thing is Bern's an optimist, too, always seeing the silver lining and hoping against hope, ready to break down barriers wherever they sit, and if he'd taken Tim's hand, Tim probably would've made that leap. Does it mean something, then? That he followed Steph's lead because she promised it would turn out well, but he needed outside forces conspiring against him to shove him into Bern's arms? Or was it just that they weren't open yet? Does it mean he liked Steph more, and now he's settling? Or he liked her less so he was more willing to risk it, lying to himself about how strong his feelings were?
Oh, god, he hopes it doesn't mean he had a crush on Nightwing, back in those early days. If he suddenly realizes that one of these days he's going to chug an entire bottle of vodka to try to wash it out of his brain, and that's not going to end well. That's going to end with someone coming to rescue him and talk him down, and that's probably going to be Dick, because Dick is the one that's always had those conversations with him. And, in this particular case, that would be - oh, fuck, he can just see that smug grin and he already wants to punch it off of Dick's face.
"Earth to Tim? You okay?" Bernard says, and Tim doesn't even remember what he was talking about anymore - oh, right. He was talking about wanting to fuck Tim's brother. Right. That's why Tim's been speechless for the last ten minutes, except he can't exactly explain, either, because the thing is. The thing is that Bern said Nightwing not Dick Grayson, and the even worse thing is that he was so carefully not saying Dick's name and it was so obvious because Tim's read gossip magazines and watched the news and he knows that look in someone's eye. And it's not like he can call his boyfriend on what he didn't say, that's just mean.
"I think I liked you in high school," Tim blurts out, instead, because here's this memory that's just come to mind: they were changing for gym and Tim suddenly had to turn around, and nothing was even happening, Bern wasn't even taking off his shirt yet, just his jacket, and there wasn't anything to see. But Tim didn't want him thinking he was looking, even though he already wasn't really.
There's a second part of the memory, too, with Bernard running as fast as he can, shirt clinging to him, wiping off his forehead with a hem that was already wet. Bernard was toned, even back then, even before he got into martial arts the way he is now. Tim thought, at the time, he was jealous. How the hell did he think he was jealous? And he calls himself a detective.
"I mean," Bernard says, carefully, with a shrug that isn't as casual as he's trying to make it seem. "I knew I liked you, I just wasn't willing to let myself know that yet. So I projected. Onto Nightwing." There's an awkward smile there as he trails off, and Tim wonders if he's thinking about what it would've been like to hold hands down the corridors, make out by the lockers, go to prom together. Maybe thinking about how, if they did, they'd have broken up by now, and maybe Tim would've dumped him because he couldn't figure out why he had so much chemistry with Steph. Or maybe it would just be Robin stuff, getting in the way of everything. Or, who knows, maybe he'd be dating some celebrity, dressing for the spotlight.
But he's been silent again too long, and Tim tries to recover with, "is it less gay if it's Nightwing?" which is not what he meant to ask at all. He meant to say something sappy, or something heartfelt, or something true. Something that would reassure Bern or something that would make them both laugh or, fuck, anything, really, to get off the topic of his brother that he's not allowed to admit is his brother and therefore can't just offer a horrified look and walk away. Not that he has the energy to be that bothered, anymore, when someone waxes rhapsodic about Dick Grayson's bubble butt or whatever. And talk show hosts definitely know - it's their job to know - that Tim doesn't need to hear that.
"Yeah. Way less. Didn't you hear me when I said it's everybody? You know there's a whole fansite devoted to him being people's celebrity exception," Bernard says, and then, at Tim's look, which he's probably misinterpreting but Tim definitely can't get himself to make any different face about that, "it's not like I was looking for it, okay, it's just a lot of the most interesting - do you know a lot of people think Nightwing might be Kryptonian? Or half, anyway, like Superboy."
"Right," Tim says, wondering who the hell claimed Nightwing was Kryptonian and why, and stands up abruptly to, he doesn't know, put on a movie or something. Anything to distract them from the disturbingness of - what the fuck is a celebrity exception and why would anyone want one? Wouldn't wanting one be evidence of - well, now Tim's just being a hypocrite, because he definitely didn't notice all the men he slotted into his 'we'll just think about them a little extra for no reason' file. "You don't still like Nightwing, do you?"
Bernard gives him the most quizzical look, and then shrugs and makes an ambivalent hand gesture, which Tim is very generously choosing to interpret as an agreement that he no longer likes and will continue to not have a crush on Dick in any capacity, forever. "You're taking this a little personally Tim. I already said, you were the first person I knew who I caught feelings for, and it's not like he's your competition or anything. You'd think you were Robin." And Tim doesn't laugh. He doesn't laugh awkwardly and sit there, or laugh hysterically and leave the room, and he doesn't laugh at the absurdity of the situation and spill everything right there, either. But they are going to have to come up with some kind of agreement about never ever talking about Nightwing ever again.
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annabelle--cane · 1 year
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uh oh gang I miss musicals
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