#i know they're probably worth way more than the passe version

[czarinakanaeva]

Bulgaria needs to change those straight leg fouettes to something else

[theaceace]

When Burgess summoned Dream, instead of Dream being completely cut off from the Dreaming, instead the magic pulled all of Fawney Rig into the soft places at the edge of the Dreaming, so like Dream still can't get out of the circle and his subjects can't get in but the Dreaming suffers much less and crucially, he still has access to some tiny fraction of his power

So now the whole house and everyone in it is sort of tied to the Dreaming and there's just oodles of magic coming off it, and the house in the Waking and the house in the Dreaming exist sort of superimposed over each other. Like you can be in one and sort of be aware of the other but you can't really flip between the two

And I want the whole thing to operate on a sort of combo between Aladdin in the cave of wonders/Orpheus leaving with Eurydice rules where it's said that if you enter the house in the Dreaming side and manage to find the Dream king, he'll grant you the thing you've been dreaming of, but the catch is you have to believe you have it. You have to leave the house without checking. So Burgess asks for Randall, but he turns to look almost before they're out of the basement because if he were Dream then he would pull a trick (TBF it wasn't actually Randall, just a dream of him, but Burgess couldn't tell the difference anyway because he was a terrible father and you can't change my mind). After that, he never managed to find the basement again. Never even manages to find the dream house again, only the waking one, although he goes mad looking for it

But like. Someone else asks for riches and the Dream king says they can be found the guy's pocket or whatever, but he can't feel anything? There's no weight there, no shape, his pocket seems empty (it isn't when he checks, but as soon as he gets out of the house, yelling about his triumph, it's gone and the house is mundane again)

Alex, who doesn't ask for anything until after the death of his father (and after he murdered Jessamy) asks for peace. For safety. The Dream king says nothing, and Alex lives the rest of his life in the Dreaming version of the house, too scared to step outside in case whatever peace he's found in his personal prison vanishes

Ethel never makes it to the house in the Dreaming . She takes what she wants from the waking, and when she leaves she doesn't look back once

Time passes, and more and more people find their way to Fawney Rig, but as Dream himself said, the great stories always return to their original forms, so no one succeeds because that's how it goes

And then. And then Hob. Hob who finds his way to the house just looking for an answer. Looking for something he can do to make sure his Stranger is there in 2089, because otherwise he might lose his mind with the what-ifs. So he finds the house, and he meets Alex, who hasn't set foot outside the front door in over 80 years except it's a little hard to feel sorry for him when Hob realises why. He meets Paul, who lives solidly in the waking, and hasn't been able to convince Alex that it would be worth it to leave with him. He finds his way down to the basement, finally, and there he finds his Stranger

And at first he thinks? It's a trick? Because isn't that sort of what this place does, it tricks you? But he speaks to Dream, and he gets the rest of the story from him, and the only thing Hob wants to take from this place is Dream. And he's like I want to get you out of here, but I can't because you're trapped in that circle (which for reasons unknown to the author right now but probably has something to do with the nature of dreams and stories can't just be broken like a regular spell circle) and I can't do anything about it and Dream is all you know the story, Hob Gadling. It is a more powerful magic than the binding. Leave, and don't look back, and trust that I am following

(Dream knows the story. He's sure he knows how it ends. But he also knows that it has to be played out, that he has to give Hob this chance - he finds himself, as he follows, weeping silently for his son and Eurydice)

So then there would be the agonising climb and return through the maze of the house where Hob almost looks back a bunch of times, and eventually he makes it to the door and steps out into the bright sun of the waking, and -

End title

[ladyblueberrymuffin]

I feel like people haven't really understood The Lost Hero, because like... "I think the reasons Piper and Jason broke up make sense. Their relationship is based on fake memories and blah blah blah"

THE LOST HERO IS LITERALLY ABOUT PIPER HAVING AN IDENTITY CRISIS, BECAUSE SHE LEARNS HER MEMORIES ARE FAKE AND SHE HAS TO LEARN TO ACCEPT IT.

The whole crux of Jasiper in The Lost Hero is they're slow and shy and even ashamed to a degree about their feelings, because they are afraid it'd be those fake memories pushing them into this.

Like, I feel like The Lost Hero couldn't be more obvious about the fact that they like each other for real, and they're the only ones who can't see it.

Piper already learned this lesson in The Lost Hero, why is this treated like a new development in The Burning Maze?

Also,

Aphrodite smiled. “Because you are my daughter, Piper. You see possibilities much more vividly than others. You see what could be. And it still might be—don’t give up."

It wasn't Hera, or Aphrodite who gave Piper the memories of dating Jason. It was Piper. Like, the way I think about it, it's like when you meet this boy, and you develop a crush, and you start making up all these fantasies about dating him in your head.

In other words, all Hera did was "introduce" Jason to Piper's brain, and because Jason is very sweet, and nice, and funny, Piper's brain was like "Yes, this guy, more please."

I dunno. I always found it cute. She's basically just dealing with an unrequited crush, just dressed up in a magic packaging.

I do think there should be more emphasis put on the fact that there are differences between how Piper "remembers" Jason, and what he's really like, and over the course of the book, she realizes that she likes real Jason more than her idealized version of him.

No one gaslit no one into liking each other. Jason and Piper actively gave each other time to process things. The Lost Hero even ends with this:

Across the green, her cabin mates looked disappointed that they hadn’t witnessed a kiss. They started cashing in their bets. But that was all right. Piper was patient.

The patient bit was always the most important to me. Piper isn't rushing things.

I think Rick heard fans complaining that Jasiper is based on fake memories and how messed up that is, and course corrected. They wanted a major character death, more representation, a different personality for Piper, not having Piper constantly think about Jason, they didn't really like Jason...

And you know, I think he's valid. Like, this is a job to him. He's feeding his family. He doesn't have to care about these fake names on the page just because I do. He wanted to accommodate the fans, he probably wanted some more meaty character stuff after the last couple of books were kinda boring with Callypso and Leo and so on, he probably thought this would get people hooked and interested.

It's fine. I'm glad he's still making books, and getting work, and helping other creators. I don't think other writers are that invested in their characters either, but when I read like a Kami Garcia schmaltzy romance, it feels like it was written with the mindset of "How would I feel if my friend stopped talking to me? How would I feel if my loved one died?" and it makes the actions of the characters feel less cold and detached.

I'd have a panic attack if I was friends with Leo and he moved on a whim, and didn't seem all that broken up about not seeing me again. I'd feel like I am not worth a lot to him. Hell, I am 23, way older than they are, and I still cry, because my friend moved away this year. I pass his house, and I realize I feel nothing, and I don't wanna be there, because he's not there, and I cry. These characters don't cry about anything, unless someone dies. And even then, a few minutes later, it's back to normal.

I dunno, is this what makes it more accessible to middle-schoolers? I feel like middle-schoolers would be even more terrified of the prospect of a friend moving away and not even feeling that sad over leaving them behind.

EDIT: Furthermore, if you think Hera put fake memories of a relationship into Piper's head... TO WHAT END?! To what end?! How does that benefit Hera in any way? Why would Hera care? Rick has done a pretty interesting thing with Hera lately by making her actually love Jason like a son, but that relationship was a lot more reserved at the time of HoO. Why would she care if he gets a girlfriend? Why would she think Piper is a good match for Jason? I feel like the last thing Hera would want for Jason is a relationship with Piper, like, common, Hera hates Aphrodite, they're like polar opposites, and the Trojan War started because of their argument (Athena was involved too, but Hera has different reasons to dislike her). Hera is the goddess of marriage, who has stayed loyal to a man who cheats on her daily, do you think she would hitch her boy with the daughter of the only woman who's body count rivals Zeus'?

[chi-the-idiot]

Full credit to @electronicdelusionstarlight 's post on what if the voices stayed with their respective princesses post the ending, as my inspiration for this came from this very idea. (this version goes more off of the idea that after the gods left the voices each were given their own reality to live with, rather than off of the more correct "we leave as mortals" ending)

(also this is probably a completely inaccurate portrayal of The Cold and The Spectre, but please just go with it for now lol. I may change it later)

OK BUT HEAR ME OUT,

The Cold, who wakes up inside the cabin, finally with a body of his own, with the Spectre sitting next to him.

The Spectre, who tries to keep her distance from him and explains what happened with the two gods, and that she can't really explain why he came back to her.

The Cold, much like her, can't explain why they're both there, but since the Narrator isn't around anymore to dictate his life, he decides that it would be too much of a hassle to kill her.

The both of them remain in the cabin together, as there is no civilization around them (does civilization even exist at this point?) and it's better to go insane in company that go insane alone (or at least that's what the Spectre says, the Cold couldn't care less).

The years pass, and they've grown into a common pattern: the Cold wakes up and fiddles around the small house he has fancied for himself in the once old cabin, while the Spectre follows him around, telling him about what she saw outside the window last night, or commenting about what ideas occurred to her for small decorations to "their house", her words, not his (or so he claims, but each time she mentions it, his eyes look softer, and his feathers seem to puff out ever so slightly). Depending on wether the Cold is going to cut some wood or go hunting, the Spectre may tag along or not by possesing his body. If it's the former, she will spend her time looking around for pinecones or pretty flowers, and collecting them inside a small basket. If it's the latter, she will stay at home and make some decorations to their little home using the items collected.

The Cold is quiet, methodical, he never does something if it is redundant to him. The Spectre, however, is (ironically) filled with life, with an appreciation for small details and the nuances of life surrounding her. He never admits it, really, but he appreciates the attempts she makes to make him happy when she can.

It isn't always sunshine and rainbows. As much as she is vivacious she also isn't clueless, and things can get ugly when in a fight. She may also sometimes get a bit mournful about the life she lost, and although she tries not to outright pin the blame on the Cold (she knows the situation was out of their hands and it did bring the gods a happy ending after all), it's difficult to forget his quiet stare as he dug the blade into her chest. She gets quiet on those days, and if confronted about it, its likely a fight will start between them.

But at the end of the day, she chose to let bygones be bygones, and every day he proves to be changing and growing into someone worth forgiving. He never quite stops his frigid ways (he never hesitates when it comes to hunting, which is exactly why she stopped going with him on those trips), but he has started smiling more, and being more reciprocal of her attentions, in his own weird way.

And one night, many years after he first woke up, as he lays on the roof of the cabin watching the stars, her conciousness next to his, he will come to understand why he appeared here after the gods left, oh so long ago now. And he will whisper, a slight tone of wonder in his voice, into the quiet night, so that only she can hear what she thought would remain unsaid for the rest of his days. And she will smile, and the Cold will feel a warmth in his chest that he thought he would never feel, and he will find that he doesn't hate it as much as he thought he would.

"I love you"

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

This is probably going to be a little sacrilegious but something that I'm finding is that when I play IS3, I am actually enjoying myself a lot. Honestly, I'm enjoying myself a lot more than I was playing IS2. This isn't to say that IS3 is perfect or anything, or even than IS2 is bad, but I find that I'm enjoying my time in IS3 just a lot more.

Now keep in mind I'm not really a hard mode grinder by any means. I didn't enjoy the difficulty mechanics in IS1 very much, and their return in IS2 really did not inspire me with much desire to tackle IS2 on a harder difficulty. IS3's difficulty is a bit...infamous for being a bit much, and honestly I'm kind of content with just poking my toes into the water in the future if I feel I want to. If you asked me to do A15 Izumik or die, I think i'd take the gun personally.

The point here is that I'm taking both of these themes from their base standpoint, and that means on the surface level that IS3 is just going to be easier. Two of IS3's unique squads (Mind Over Matter and People-Oriented) not only feel stronger than any squad in IS2, but they're dramatically more interesting to play. You also start off with significantly higher buffs in IS3 over IS2. You have stronger statistical buffs, you have more resources, you have the frankly crazy perfect clear about 8 Max HP buff, and the new node types, all of which are good.

I don't really want to come in from the difficulty angle, although it is maybe unavoidable that more runs in IS3 for me feel like they actually finish compared to IS2. This is partly due to difficulty and partly do to factors that extend into the design of stages themselves.

I will summarize my thoughts here and maybe make a point later on to elaborate them in a different post

-IS3 gives you more opportunities to develop runs, mostly through the use of keys -Keys fuck, and honestly I will probably enjoy IS4 even more given it uses keys in a much cooler way. Having more control over a run feels really nice -Map design in IS3 is a LOT better than in IS2. A lot of IS2's map design is based on IS1, which I'm going to be brave and say is by and large total shit, and IS2 relies a LOT on what are basically pranks -Seriously, fuck the Lost Colossus stage in IS2. -This makes it so its a lot easier to get a sense of flow in IS3. You can look at a stage in IS3, and know how to reasonable tackle it. This isn't consistently true in IS2. Shit in IS2 just fucking, moves. -Also the fact that IS2 kept the absolutely awful Bear and Duck stages where you just contend with increasing numbers of bullshit, and decided to make one version with fucking Sandbeasts makes me really ticked off. These stages are so much better in IS3 -Corrosion is a significantly better mechanic than Sanity. I am not a Sanity defender and I think it says something that I consider Scarlet Singers so dangerous you have to always account for them -Granted Sea Skimmers also suck dick, Low-Altitude Hovering my beloathed -Paranoia Illusion is a much fairer boss than Lucian, Blood Diamond. I feel like if IS2 had an A15 people would legit hate this boss. You're generally priced into trying to kill him on the first pass or develop enough life to deal with leaks from the defender side. It's never worth actually developing that side if he breaks the roadblocks. -I also like Ishar'mla more than Troupe Mouthpiece. Mouthpiece's stage has a really baller design, but it is maybe the ending out of the 8 in the first two IS that requires the most specific set of units. -Also unlocking Ishar'mla is generally a bit easier than Mouthpiece and doesn't require you giving up a boss relic and THEN hitting a random event

But like, IS3 isn't perfect. It has its bad stages and frankly really annoying bullshit (Territorial Tendencies and Ubi bona somnia are quite bad as Emergency Operations). The Light mechanic is annoyingly useless and not even really fun to interact with. Izumik is uh

well frankly I kind of stopping wanting to do it that entire thing is beans

and the Resourceful Squad exists to remind me that I am not Fate's Favorite Child, I will roll nat 1s on my D12s

[blorbopolis]

hello! im sorry if you get asked this a lot, but I was curious how you got into doing art ttrpg? and what should an interested artist have in their portfolio? thank you 💖

hi! so i wrote out a big "how to" before re-reading your message and considering you maybe just... asked how it happened for *me*, not necessarily how someone else should do it LOL. so, how it happened for me: i've been actively courting freelance art work since ~2009, and fantasy ttrpg is a natural extension of my interests - my portfolio was already full of world of warcraft fanart by the time ttrpgs & D&D really started having their modern moment. TTRPG is a good low-to-mid level place to find leads, as well, because the barrier for entry is super low for creators, which means a lot MORE projects to go around. (If you want to make a board game, your artist has to know a LOT about packaging, printing, manufacturing, graphic design, etc. if you wrote a D&D module and just want to publish it on itch.io? your artist only needs to know how to send you a decent sized .jpg.) as far as portfolio goes, when i started getting consistent replies to my cold emails, my portfolio had mostly covers and half-pages (ie, narrative illustrations), portraits, and animals. If you want to be more well-rounded you could also include pieces focusing on environments, items, and creatures. Don't include anything unless it's GOOD though. (i am so serious about this - bad work in your portfolio makes the good stuff look like a fluke.) now. if you wanted a "how to" answer, here is 600 words lol. I'm gonna start with the base assumption that your work is already hirable so we can focus on just like, specialization + client acquisition tips. getting a folio up to snuff is a whole other can of beans short version goes like this:

this whole thing only works if you have the ability to honestly self-assess. new work & skills: you should have fresh stuff that's a snapshot of what you can do *right now.* this doesn't mean old work can't stay in your folio if it's still good, but a small, current folio that really hits is WAY better than a bloated old one with irrelevant studies or student work. new artistic peers: as you continue to evolve as a professional, you should have an idea of which other working artists your work is most similar to, in terms of skill/tone/specialties/other relevant skills (3D/graphic design/etc) in order to see how you stack up to your """competition""" for lack of a better word. Additionally those artistic peers have hangout zones (discords or FB groups, etc) where you can talk shop & pass around job leads. research peers' clients: research who those peers are contracting with. See if your work would be a fit for them; if so, find their contact info and put it on your list. Those clients are probably also promoting other similar projects or publishers on their feeds; twitter has a handy "you might also want to follow" list that has other similar accounts you can explore. You can also work backwards from the product to the creator (see any cool battle maps, CCGs, board games, etc? find out who made it and whether they're the ones doing the art hiring.) Additionally, those discords & fb groups I mentioned will have leads (of varying quality) shared around that you should be assessing as they come in. reach out to new batch of clients: cold email. be realistic about who's worth contacting, but don't self-disqualify. that part is a balance. art directors are people with problems to solve, and you need to be able to A. anticipate the problems they need solving, and B. confidently (and honestly) let them know exactly what you can do for them. Attach A FEW, SMALL, RELEVANT jpgs that they can easily download and keep for reference. do not send massive high res attachments, their inboxes are full enough as it is. If you're responding to a specific call, attach relevant pieces or curate a page on your portfolio site specifically for work that would fit the project. If reaching out to clients doesn't result in a lead - *or*, if it takes them 3 months to get back to you, you should spend that time doing your own stuff and bolstering your skills. eventually your portfolio will be good enough that it kicks down doors for you.

you'll notice i never included "be active on social media! post your new work! feed instagram's ad revenue by giving it more content!" in this strategy because it doesn't matter. i'm not professionally active on any social media. we were getting hired before twitter existed and we'll still get hired after it dies. just do make sure you have an online portfolio (your own website >> artstation >>> other free folio builders >>>>>>>>>>>> an instagram feed.) the more times you do this cycle the easier it gets; both because you'll just get good at every step of the process, and because more people will know you and have known you for *longer* so you seem like a safer bet. I'll be honest: it's a ton of rejection lmao. I would get a rejection in my inbox at least once a week - even more than that i'd just get radio silence. But eventually you'll get a yes, and if you're lucky that yes will result in high quality new work you're proud of and can put into your folio (taking you back to step 1 lol.)

the freelance life is (INSHALLAH!!!) behind me since i now have a full time job doing marketing/supporting art for video games. But my portfolio never would've gotten there if i didn't have the experience of going through the freelance meat grinder first. it really taught me how to be an actualized *creative* (who can stand up for her own expertise, think like a project manager, and take creative ownership of / responsibility for my assignments) and not just a hired hand. my team likes that. i think

[koifishart]

I want to be Your Koi Fish

Warning: +18 content, criminal underworld, intercourse, strong language - and so on

Fanfiction based on: "Baki" by Itagaki Keisuke

>14<

It was nice to wake up next to her again. She was completely different from him in every way, the opposite, and that was probably why he felt so clearly, that they complemented each other. Kaoru wished she could have stayed... but comforted himself that it would be soon. Everything was going in the right direction. Surprising excitement burst him from within. If he were a more enthusiastic version of himself, like Hanabi, would probably be jumping with joy just thinking about getting married. Walking down the side streets of the suburbs, thought he was actually not far from her home. He heard screams and sounds of fighting. Headed for a fenced lot that looked forgotten by the owners. It was a picture of a bleak, somewhat wild meadow with a very uneven fight going on - Baki against Sikorsky and Yanagi. Kozue was looking at everything with anxiety. It seemed that she was unnecessarily nervous. The youngster turned out to be more efficient and stronger than before, and certainly much more confident. His pressing the young ones had an unexpectedly good effect.

- Well, I think you won ... - he said, putting hand on the girl's shoulder. - He got stronger and grew up in a few days. How you did it, I have no idea, but congratulations on your success.

- Hanayama-san? I haven't noticed you before! - Baki asked surprised.

Or maybe he was still the same rather unwise adolescent? After all, not much time passed. He still had to mature.

- You're like a completely different person. - Kaoru commented.

- Not completely. I don't care if I'm strong or not... - the young man muttered seriously. - It's enough that I can protect myself and her.

While they're talking at their best, the two fugitives gathered their last strength. They were not looking good and yet still did not acknowledge their failure. Young Hanma just looked in their direction disapprovingly, and after a while he jumped up, grabbed Kozue into his arms and ran away. Hanayama did not expect such a turn of events, but Baki actually had nothing to finish. There were losers, and if they didn't notice it, it's another matter. He glanced angrily at the two battered men. They looked ready for anything, even desperate.

- I don't want... - he said, walking away.

They were not worth his interest. With the rest, he did his job. The phone rang in pocket. He picked up hastily.

- Hi Kaoru! - heard a happy greeting. - You're busy?

- No, actually I'm hanging around on the edge of your neighborhood. - he replied, looking around a bit.

- From the park? If so, it's great, I'm in it right now. Will you come over? - she snapped back, then spoke firmly to someone else. - Oh, hi! What are you doing here, Haga?

Haga? He had been friends with him since school, but didn't like it. For his taste, he knew too much about her, saw too often, became too familiar. He took from a pocket inside jacket a photograph that one of his men had given him. He sighed heavily.

- Kaoru?

- Yes, sure. I'll be there in a moment. - he replied. - Wait for me.

Shortly after disconnected, the smartphone vibrated again. She sent a picture. Hung upside down on it, keeping only her legs on the railing. In the background he could see a part of the park and a small hill. She sent a kiss. He knew this place, knew where to go.

>>><<<

She had a lot of energy that day. Maybe charged up while staying with him? It's been a while, but who knows? She felt much better with Hanayama than with anyone else. Decided to take advantage of this vigor and exercise a little in the fresh air. She wanted a street workout very much, and there was no better terrain in the area than the rails, ladders and slopes in the park, which few could use. She tucked a leather wide belt, a shirt dress, and tighter heeled sandals into backpack. She wore a blue top, her favorite white shorts with a pattern of colorful birds and flowers, and sneakers. In order not to damage the ring, she hid it in a separate pocket of the wallet. Couldn't forget it! At first, she decided to warm muscles with a run, especially since it had about two kilometers to cover. On the spot, could recall pull-ups, dips, rolls, standing on her hands. She felt even better... could she do more? At the break, decided to check. She dialed his number, waiting impatiently for him to answer. Picked up. He had time. She hung her head down when saw him. Medium height and build, dark-haired, in dark jeans and a leather jacket. He looked as if had found her by accident.

- Oh, hi! What are you doing here, Haga? - she said carelessly.

- I was just passing by, and here I am ... - he replied.

- Kaoru? - she asked, hearing nothing on the other side of the receiver.

- Yes, sure. I'll be there in a moment. - he said finally. - Wait for me.

It sounded strange. Kind of upset? Worried? Maybe something happened that he was concerned about? She held her arm out in front of her, posing for a photo. Judged that it was not too bad and sent it. She hoped to cheer him up a little.

He arrived shortly after. She had managed to find out about a few troubles at Haga's house, the fact that his gang buddies had incorporated more, and he seemed to be doing quite well as the leader of the petty gang. When Hanayama saw them sitting side by side on the bench, laughing out loud, it seemed as if his eyelid had twitched.

- You actually weren't far! - She smiled heartily coming up to him.

- A few blocks. - he replied, putting his arm around her so she could snuggle in, then looked at the dark-haired man nearby. - Haga... would you leave us alone?

- Sure, Hanayama-san. Actually, it's time for me, I have some errands to do. - said a friend. - Have a nice afternoon!

She frowned. Since when was he so openly chasing someone? And since when casting out so openly Haga?! They were friends from high school, if not further! She looked at him in surprise. He was a very calm and subdued man, even stoic... but this time there was something on his face that she saw for the first time.

- Kaoru, what ...

- I don't want you two to spend so much time together. - he ordered, pressing her harder. - Especially in such desolate places.

- You're jealous...? - she whispered, covering mouth with hand. - Because of him?

- How do you know? - he was surprised.

- I can see it in your eyes. - she muttered, placing her fingers on sliced cheeks. - There's something about them that I've never seen before.

She wasn't lying. Saw passion and flame, much wilder than the moment of anger he had so infrequently. Plus, after he was clinging her to him, it was very easy to say that wasn't going to give her back to anyone, but...Haga? There was something else. With a heavy sigh, he pulled the photograph out from behind his coat. She and HAGA, just as she placed a friendly kiss on his smooth cheek. She turned confused eyes on her fiancé.

- You follow me? - she said nervously.

- My people make sure you don't get hurt. - he replied, putting his other arm around her. - They took this photo without an order. I didn't want to show you this, I was going to ignore it ... but when I heard you greet him today ... I don't like it.

It's sweet that he was concerned about her safety. It's just a pity that his people took the flowers out of context. The situation was more than innocent, but no one made him aware of it. She couldn't blame him for feeling unsafe in this situation.

- You know what he came for then? - she asked firmly, and when he shook his head she continued. - Haga was defending your business.

- What?

- He pulled me out for a break to talk. I don't know how, but found out about the proposal. He helped me make a decision. Did not stand against you. - she replied, automatically adjusting and smoothing white jacket. - Our meetings were never planned. We just run into each other and that's it. Like today.

- And a kiss? - he asked, still a bit tense.

- Hardly a kiss on the cheek. A small, friendly, heartfelt "thank you" for simplifying the situation. Haga always showed me the answer under my nose as I searched the horizon. - she replied with a shrug. - That's great friend material, but nothing else. I am not interested in such boys. I prefer my man.

He took a breath, but instead turned red like a ripe tomato. Probably felt foolish for suspecting her. She thought. Maybe it's good that he felt even a little jealous? She stepped aside to go to the backpack. Pulled out her dress and threw it over her head, sliding off her shorts. She tightened the wide belt, changed her sneakers for high heels. The last detail was a small gold ring with a heart hidden in the pocket of the wallet, which soon found itself on her ring finger. She came back to him, throwing the backpack over her shoulder.

- You really thought I could cheat on you? - she asked, puffing lips a little.

- Rather, he has impure intentions. - he muttered, looking away.

- Oh, come on, don't worry! - she laughed, cuddling under a muscular arm.

- You're not angry?

- I'm a bit sad ... but on the other hand, if you're so jealous, you must care a lot. - she muttered, looking at him. - And I love you anyway!

A few days left. She managed to pack her things, most of them have even been taken. Kaoru was more impatient than she was. Of course was looking forward to it too, but still couldn't believe it. She did not realize that just a moment, another moment, and the person called "Soga Hanabi" would cease to exist, "Hanayama Hanabi" would appear in her place. After meeting the sisters, she began to worry that her mother would not agree and everything would collapse like a house of cards. She didn't tell Kaoru - don't want to worry him, she wanted to do it herself, and her father ... told her not to worry. That way she was lying across the bed again, this time with a full set of documents in her hand. Papers that she had to submit to the office on her wedding day. It is amazing how pragmatic the whole enterprise turned out to be. Oh, they will transfer her from father to husband and that's it. The marriage is considered contracted. She filled them with shaking hands. His last name spelled a strange word next to her own name. Of course she loved him, but this whole marriage...didn't think she would ever come to it, with anyone. In addition, preparations for the traditional ceremony took place next to her. All she knew was that she had to take care of the outfit for herself, because HE wanted to see HER, not a doll from old tales. Guessed what he was hitting at. They weren't traditional. They weren't ordinary. However, the situation required a certain traditional character. Fortunately, she had no problem with that, but rather wondered if could push it through, especially in the eyes of Fujiki housekeeper. She was exceptionally nice and cordial to everyone, and for her turned out to be extremely strict. Maybe it's that skirt... or maybe it's because she's a girl?

- How is the future bride feeling? - a low voice asked.

She held up a stack of pages. Father stood in the doorway, and seeing her gaze, entered the room, pulled up a swivel chair and sat on it, watching.

- Confused. - she croaked, then cleared her throat a bit and handed him the papers. - Why was the mother's signature not required?

- I didn't want to tell you earlier, because it isn't pleasant, but since you are asking ... She considered your last meeting with her to be insubordination and completely offended, she renounced her parental rights. - Goro replied sadly putting the file on the desk.- I'm sorry to inform you of something so unpleasant at the moment when you should be enjoying.

- Well, at least she's been decent enough not to get in my way. Our... - she muttered, pressing the pillow to her chest.

She felt something tighten in the dimple, and then tears rolled down her face. She covered her mouth with the cloth.

- What's bothering you, Little Fox? - he asked, kneeling beside her.

- I don't know, Papa ... I'm so glad, very ... but I don't think Kaoru thought it through properly. - she sobbed, sliding down and resting her head in his lap to stroke her hair. - After all ... he will have a murderer to wife. Papa ... I feel bad about it ...

- I would consider you crazy if you were well! The killings you have committed are nothing to praise, but you can't undo it. - he replied with a heavy sigh. - And if Kaoru had bothered, he would have quit long ago.

- You don't know what he is ... - she muttered, sniffing.

- I do know what you are. You are basically a good person. Unfortunately, we both have this environment and not the other ... - he replied quietly, still combing the raven's curls. - Why don't you go out into city? Lonely voyage, the last time as a single? You'll get some distance before the big day.

Maybe he was right? In fact... he definitely did. Father often threw ideas from outer space, but when the situation demanded, he dug up this much smarter, more experienced part of his personality. She put on a black top, frayed jeans that were fastened with a black belt with an attached pouch, and a black and red checked shirt over shoulders. Red sneakers were waiting by the door. At the last moment, grabbed the wireless headphones. She had to cut herself off from the world. Walked where legs took her, catching a bubble-tea booth on the way. She made it downtown without even noticing when. She also didn't pay attention to girls approaching her. She shuddered, almost spilling the contents of the cup as one of them prodded her arm. She pushed the headphones off her ears.

- You are so much thoughtful lately, Hanabi-chan! - Shiori laughed. - OH GOSH! RING?!

- Are you getting married?! - Madoka asked. - Tell me! The boy with the roses proposed?!

For them he was a "boy with roses", for her a man whom she loved more than her life and at the same time wanted to save from herself. She swallowed hard, nodding.

- But I envy you! - Misaki squealed. - He is so cute! And as you can see, he has a taste!

- Each medal has two sides ... - she muttered.

- Oh, somebody's got the blues! - Madoka assessed. - Come on, maybe we can catch some ice cream somewhere!

She wondered what she could tell them, and what better to keep quiet to keep them safe. They couldn't find out who he was, certainly not now. Maybe... then she will have to cut off contacts with them? What if the wedding doesn't happen? Most likely she will come back to the orders. Or maybe not at all? Maybe will try to straighten her life? But what about whitening if Kaoru isn't around? The friends chattered merrily as she fought a heavy, bloody battle with her thoughts. She barely registered that they were asking her about the flavor of the ice cream. She chose a lemon one that suited her mood.

- You aren't happy? - Madoka asked. - I would probably be jumping with happiness!

- Exactly! Especially if it's a love wedding! And with such a handsome guy!

- Of course I'm glad ... - she muttered. - ... But my new life will be full of responsibilities and difficult choices.

- PLEASE! Each is! - Shiori snorted, hanging on her shoulder. - You have grown terribly in the last few months.

- Exactly! Very grown up and so... serious... You will definitely make it, Hanabi-chan! - Junko added happily. - It's important that you love each other!

She frowned. What were they talking about? She grew up? Somehow didn't notice. Was still a snot, little thought of a runaway. The problem was, she would have caused an even bigger problem then, because Hanayama would most certainly go searching. Plus, she was still being targeted by the people she was going to kill him for. Didn't want to be a burden. She didn't want to soil his life with her bloody existence. So why had she been doing this for several months? She was selfish, she became his girlfriend because it's so "cool" to be the partner of a mafia boss. At that moment, she didn't think about him, but about herself. She felt terrible with that thought. Hanabi accepted the proposal out of love, but she could not fool herself that she was clean. Could it be that remorse touched her? Pain because of everything she did? Looked straight ahead. Somehow they got to his apartment building. The sun was heading west.

- I don't want to be here ... - Junko whispered.

- Neither do I. They say these are yakuza buildings. - Misaki said conspiratorially. - Are we going back?

- You know ... I'll go on, I remembered something. - she muttered and waved to them. - Bye! And thanks for everything!

Not so long ago, she was in front of this building by accident. This time... probably too. Or maybe fate again? Destiny to just be here, is this where she belongs? She headed towards the park behind the skyscraper. Wanted to be close to him without taking up his time. She put on the headphones, had almost forgotten. What's up in line? She listened to the text as she sat down on the bench among the trees.

„I need a gangsta

To love me better

Than all the others do

To always forgive me

Ride or die with me

That's just what gangsters do"*

How real it was. She needed him more than he needed her. SHE needed someone who would be able to forgive whatever she did, because "this is our world". She felt her heart break into tiny pieces. The more thought about it, the gloomier the conclusions became. Or maybe she was thinking too much? Maybe should throw herself into what they call "adulthood" and not look back? She rested her head in hands, tucking fingers into hair and letting the tears fall straight onto the beaten earth.

- What are you doing here? - she heard a low voice above her as soon as someone's hand slipped the headphones from her ears.

She noticed the crocodile leather shoes in front of her and the white legs drooping over them. What a miracle? He had a feeling? Had he seen her through the window? She looked at him with teary green eyes. He knelt beside her immediately, completely ignoring the light-colored pants. He cupped her chin gently so she wouldn't turn her face away.

- Who hurt you? - he asked bluntly, and she shook her head hastily as she touched cut fingers.

- It won't work... you deserve someone better than me... - she whispered, covering face with hands.

He should get pissed or admit she's right and GO, and instead he put big hands around her and hugged against purple shirt. He did everything to keep her from leaving him. Sweet bondage.

- You're a terrible liar. - he muttered in his ear. - Where would I find a better one?

- But I... I am a murderer, Kaoru. MURDERER! - she moaned, automatically nestling into him even tighter. - I didn't even kill out of revenge, but for money! Or worse...

- At the age of 15, I attacked the building of the Tomizawa group alone, injured and killed a lot of people with my bare hands. Hammered their boss into the wall, went to jail for everything. I put Yuri Chakowsky in a serious condition in the hospital just to attract Baki to me, and him in turn to have Yujiro Hanma appear in front of me. - he muttered. - I have killed and maimed many times, not for money, not always out of revenge... and although I'm not proud of it, I will probably have to keep doing it if I want to survive.

- Kaoru...

- You have to stay and help me, because I want to live for you. - he finished, kissing her cheek and lifting her tiny face towards his. - Only you are left with me in this dirty world.

Hanabi threw herself on his neck, crying on the arm covered with white cloth. He pressed her against him. She felt incredibly safe. Was glad this conversation took place before the wedding. Hanayama let her go when she was completely calmed down. He suggested to stay, but she wanted to go home to father. She had to thank him and apologize for choking herself all day instead of listening to him. Or is it better? Maybe without this moment as she greedily tried to catch some air, she wouldn't have appreciated what breath was? She stopped at a modest, traditional house. An old man dressed in a plain gray yukata sat on the porch. As soon as he noticed her, he took the long pipe out of his mouth.

-----------------

*part of the song: "Gangsta" by Kehlani

[el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle]

I want to watch other versions of betty la fea, which ones are worth watching?

Hiii! Sorry for the super late reply! Tbh, the only other versions I've tried to watch have been the Mexican, the Spanish, and the modern American one. Personally, I wouldn't recommend any of them for he following reasons:

The Mexican (La Fea más Bella): the acting is very goofy and fake. Ig you're into cringe humour, and want to watch a version that is mainly a parody with very bad and exagerated acting and knowing it to be bad, maybe give it a try, but if you're expecting a novela that knows how to oscillate well between serious moments and comedic ones with serious actors that portray deep emotion, this one probably isn't for you. Some favorable points are that it extends the "dating" period when Armando and Betty are secretly together before her transformation, Patricia does change and ends up with Nicolás, and it defintedly had more budget. I didn't finish it because there were lots of incredibly annoying and cringe moments for me, inckuding but not limited to: Betty's attitude being more like a spoiled overgrown child than a woman with low self steem, the addition of Sofía's children to the cast (i hate children in novelas lol), weird situations like Betty getting a doubke identity and pretending to be like a diva or something after returning to ecomoda, etc.

The Spanish one (Yo Soy Bea): this one is better than the Mexican one, but it's also the farthest one away from the source material. I didn't finish it either so I'll just say what I got from it from what I watched. In this one, Betty's mom is dead. Armando and Maria Beatriz are lovers, and after her disappearance, he's a murder suspect. Just by that, you get an idea of how out there it is lol the acting is way less cringe than the Mexican one, and personally, I think this Betty captures the tendrtness and sweetness of the original one. Armando isn't as good, tho, but that's an issue that equally applies to all versions I've seen.

The new American one (Betty in New York): this one actually had Gaitan a litte involved. He passed before it was finished, tho. It is a dramatic and entertaining modern twist, but of course, it keeps itself in safe grounds considering the modern sensibilities. You won't find any yelling or hair pulling from Armando or don Hermes, and in general there's very little to compare them to the original. They're much sweeter and in touch with their emotions. And don Hermes is even portrayed as this sweet old man! The Ugly Cuartel is not called Ugly. Anyways, you get the idea. This one has a very very good budget. Although not very light and comedic, tbh. This one is much better for drama. However, this one is the closest one to the original.

Personally, the big changes in personalities, pasts, and especially the bad castings keep me away from all these versions.

These are the only one I've watched, and tbh, after these three tries, I've settled with just rewatching ysblf!😂😂

[femgineerasolution]

any tips on how a newbie could start learning about software engineering?

Hi Nonny! Oh gosh, I might go on a bit here. I got into software engineering in a really weird way, basically fell into it, and that was like over a decade ago so a lot of things might have changed! There's a lot of good online resources for getting started in programming and engineering, and the whole maker-space scene is brimming with really cool and interesting people you can learn a lot from. But, beyond the cut you'll find my not particularly well organised thoughts!

Try to pick up a few different programming languages, including different types (like interpretted/scripting, imperative, object-oriented, there's a lot!)

I highly recommend learning Python, it's really useful for a wide range of stuff, I often use it just to automate something that would otherwise be tedious to do

Remember that all languages are a bit different, and will differ in the kinds of problems they're better at solving. No language is a panacae to all problems, so the more languages you know the less time you'll spend hammering a square language into a round hole! I think all languages can teach you something about programming, even if you don't use them so much in the end

For how to learn? I can't direct you to good resources, beyond knowing that there's a lot of good tutorials online, and saying that looking at tutorials is usually better than jumping in the deep end (as you can fall into bad habits that way)

For the engineering side, a good place to start is learning about software lifecycles - how do you go from need to finished solution? Waterfall and V are easy to understand but a bit old-school now, I think agile has really taken over (though is not always implemented well)

Design and requirements capture is so, so important, and so difficult, they're really good things to look into for engineering

I can't find the right thing to call it, but a useful idea is writing tests for your code first, based on the requirements, and then writing the code to make those tests pass. Not always appropriate, but being exposed to that idea helped me change the way I did some things

Version control! Very important, I didn't use to think it was until I made an error in a script that ended up deleting all the code me and two others were working on. Now I use it even for small at-home projects, because it's great to be able to go "oh no, I've broken everything, let's revert back to something that worked". Git is probably the most popular, and github has a really good tutorial (featuring their adorable cat-octopus mascot)

Once you've got the hang of version control, you could try getting involved in some open source stuff, check out https://www.firsttimersonly.com/ for some guidance on that

For me, it was really important to get a degree in this stuff. Like, any job I would have been interested in required a degree. I don't know how much that's changed, but it's worth thinking about. Depending on where you are things like conversion courses and intercolated years (where you take a year out of a degree to do some stuff from a different degree) might be available? And maybe nowadays there might be more companies that will judge you based on a porfolio of previous work instead of just a degree

Final thought, it was a bit of a meme back in uni, but the engineers always used to say that the big different between a software engineer and a computer scientist was that an engineer would actually consider what their code was going to run on. It was a bit mean, but it really hammered in the importance of considering the environment your code will run in

Okay, that was a lot, I'm not sure how clear it was, but I hope it helps!

If anyone wants any other advice about particular stuff, shoot me an ask! Though I received this one in August so I can't guarantee how quickly I'll see it and reply, sorry.

[parameddic]

R I O T // no reason for that, just noticed that the ones I wanted to pick could spell something lol

this is for the sex headcanons meme, sexually explicit words/conversations under the cut!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

tk is open to experimentation in general with a communicative partner, but because - especially as BJ knows him - he's more into passing sex, he has a selection of 'tame'/vanilla-adjacent things he'll indulge people with if they ask but he isn't actually into anything too out of the normal for that one-off deal. one-night-stands have less experimentation than longer-night-stands, and they again have less than people he's in a committed relationship with.

for what it's worth, he's tried most of it actually, and he knows what he likes. he did get into the party and play (drugs + sex) side of things for a little while but that was an ex boyfriend's suggestion and he really didn't like it, messed with his head in a way that the two things separately didn't (which is saying something 'cause he's sober and he wants to be, it's not like using didn't hurt him as well, but party and play was. just a bad mix for him. really quite destructive).

do they take risks? he's one of those people who regularly gets tested for STIs and he uses condoms as standard. he carries condoms with him. i don't think 'risk' is really a word to use about him, but he does sometimes say 'i wanna try something' with someone he has Something of a relationship with, on the spur of the moment in the middle of sex, and he supposes that could be a 'risk' but he would only do it if he. trusted they would stop him if they wanted to, lol.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

for BJ, not romantic at all. one night stands in general, not romantic at all. he wants to get what he wants out of this situation and they probably explicitly agreed beforehand straight-up this was just a night of fun, "you wanna get out of here?" style, and the words he will use are fuck and yeah and more but you will not have him calling it 'sex' or 'making love' or 'please'. this is a short, sharp thing he is getting because he needs it and they - fuck, he doesn't know, but they're up for it and they're hot and they're cute and he's horny and they're both happy with the terms of engagement, so whatever. the more a stranger to him they are the better.

"babe" or "baby" are really his romantic 'flags'. they are not entirely a conscious choice and they can slip out of him. he is mmmmmm. if you are looking for romance it's probably closer the slower he goes, the more he languishes in the moment, the more he draws it out, the more he is willing to Look at them and use their Name and kiss them for the sake of kissing. wants to be physically close in a way that the one-night-stands don't quite rival, he looks for the points of contact he can take. come back, don't go, hold on like this, he's holding on with both hands, yeah?

... one night stands have that more blase, grinning, menace-on-purpose version of TK. he is there On Purpose and he wants to make them cum On Purpose and he protects his more. soft side with that sharp mischief, and it's a lot of fun for everyone involved, don't get him wrong. He's Really Good At That. but if you want to know he's serious you'll find less and less mischief the further you get into the actual act of it, if he's one-night-standing he'll hold that tone all the way through.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He's great at it, he likes it, that and humping are probably his go-to for a night unless someone asks for something different or it's like, a special occasion, or it's just really something he's feeling that night. Like, he has done anal with strangers for sure, but his go-to is not that, it's just a lot of prep and a lot of work for something that is that brief.

He prefers to give. he looks good on his knees and he knows it. you will not catch him complaining regardless.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

a couple dildos, alex once gave him a chastity cage which tk does not use and only tried for a bad two days (i don't think he owns it anymore for obvious reasons, it was Not for him), he has a couple of vibrators he is not giving me more information about. and lube, obviously. he Has these toys, won't tell me when he uses them or who he prefers to use them with/for, so 🤷‍♂️ but does practice that same condom-safety with toys as he does without them.

@ofyorkshire

[fallintosanity]

not to make an already complicated/heartbreaking situation even MOAR complicated/heartbreaking, but like... imagine if Cloud and his new friends somehow got teleported forward (sideways?) in time back to Cloud's Future. who handles it the best? who handles it the worst? who gets adopted into avalanche? who (aside from sephiroth haha) is completely at odds with Cloud's Other Friends from day one? etc

(Sorry for the slow reply, I'm at a work conference this week! Although tbh this is much more fun to talk about than the conference stuff. XD )

Weirdly enough, I don't think this meeting would end up being that heartbreaking, or even dramatic? Aside from Cloud getting to reunite with his family, of course.

Putting Remake and all versions of Sephiroth aside for a sec (are we including Noctis in this? he's so far out of context in this scenario that I don't think he'd be all that exciting to explore, aside from the usual holy-shit reaction to the Armiger, so also putting Noctis aside), AVALANCHE and the Firsts simply don't have enough knowledge about each other, or enough in common, to make for a really interesting scene. Which feels kinda bad to say but, well...

(cut for length because whoops)

When you think about it, the primary antagonist for most of the OG is the ShinRa Company, personified by President ShinRa, the Turks, Rufus, Scarlett, Heidegger, and Hojo. So the members of AVALANCHE don't have any real beef with, or even knowledge of, the TFA gang. Barret, Tifa, and OG-Yuffie hate ShinRa, but are indifferent to its SOLDIER Firsts (based on how they treat Cloud while they still think he used to be one). Nanaki and Cid got pulled into AVALANCHE by circumstance, not personal ideologies / goals. Vincent was asleep for the events of Crisis Core. Reeve might have known the Firsts in passing, but it's highly unlikely that he was told the truth about what happened to any of them in the OG timeline.

To them, meeting Angeal, Genesis, Kunsel, and Zack would be... vaguely awkward, I think? These are Cloud's new friends who aren't exactly replacements for his old friends, but aren't exactly not, either. Sure, they work for ShinRa, but so did Reeve. For the most part, they're just forgotten names from old war headlines.

As for the Firsts, meeting AVALANCHE is also not really a big thing, other than Genesis interrogating everyone about Cloud (these people Know Things! about his Cloud!), and the universal Oh No of realizing Yuffie is still, well, Yuffie. Zack is friendly and personable enough to try to handle introductions and Make New Friends, but if Yuffie remembers him from her version of the Wutai War, that could make things trickier. (Plus the added weirdness of Tifa knowing Zack from this timeline's Nibelheim Incident, although he wouldn't realize it and she wouldn't mention it.) Beyond that, though, the meeting would be an uncomfortable sort of sizing up of each other, then an inevitable mutual retreat once Genesis's Shenanigans(tm) annoy someone too much.

(I think Cloud would kind of... avoid introducing the two groups for this exact reason? XD He wouldn't try to actively stop them - he knows too well that that's the best way to activate Genesis Persistence Mode - but he wouldn't make an effort to bring them together, either. And would probably mysteriously vanish the second he realized it was going to happen.)

It definitely gets more complicated if Sephiroth is there. I say if because if he knew the meeting was coming, he'd try to avoid it as well. Between seeing Cloud's nightmares, the conversation they had in Chapter 7 of Providence, and experiencing the Calamity firsthand, Sephiroth is keenly aware of his, hm... significance to Cloud's friends, in magnitude if not in detail. (Although it's worth pointing out that Sephiroth doesn't know the Calamity killed Aeris, or even that Cloud & co knew her. Kunsel, Zack, and Genesis know, but haven't had the chance or the reason to tell him.) Also, depending on how much time passes between the TFA group landing in Cloud's timeline and when they meet AVALANCHE, Sephiroth would have seen the ruins of Midgar, and the hard lives of Edge's residents, up close - which would be yet another reminder of the hurt his alternate-timeline self caused. He isn't remotely capable of dealing with any of that, so he'd find somewhere isolated to hole up. (Yes, this is the same bad instinct that caused him to go insane in the OG.)

If he can't avoid the meeting, he'd still stay back and avoid interacting as much as possible, which is less about trying not to upset the AVALANCHE crew and more because he's so overwhelmed. On top of failing to deal with his own emotions about the situation, Sephiroth would be spending a lot of mental effort policing his own body/posture/expression/etc in the hope of looking as normal/human as possible. Even before seeing the Calamity, he realized Cloud gets less murderous the more human Sephiroth seems, and the Calamity's unnatural appearance and movement patterns only reinforced that. It's the only defense mechanism he has, the only way he can think of to demonstrate to both AVALANCHE and himself that he is not the Calamity.

On the AVALANCHE side, the reactions are a very mixed bag. Like I said earlier, most of them have no personal reason to hate Sephiroth/the Calamity during the OG, until he kills Aeris and summons Meteor. Even with Advent Children, the remnants aren't exactly him, and there's still nothing personal in AVALANCHE's conflicts with them. So for Barret, Nanaki, Cid, Reeve, and Yuffie, seeing TFA!Sephiroth would be weird and ominous, but also very obvious that this living, breathing, sane man isn't the undead alien Calamity they fought. After an initial "oh shit" moment, once they'd had time to see that, they'd be wary of him, but not hostile.

For Vincent, seeing this Sephiroth would be a painful shock. With his hair in a ponytail, Sephiroth generally looks more like Lucrecia than Hojo, and, well, that's a complicated issue for Vincent. After seeing Lucrecia's son in the form of the Calamity in his timeline, seeing a version who is sane and human and looks very much like his mother would be difficult for Vincent to deal with. He would most likely retreat to have an emotion in private.

Tifa, who met more-or-less-this-version of Sephiroth in Nibelheim, before the Incident, would struggle with how to respond. On the one hand, this is the Sephiroth she and everyone else knew before he went insane, who smiled and was polite and took a photo with a starstruck teenage girl. On the other hand, he almost killed her before he died and became the Calamity. Still, Tifa is an incredibly kind and sensitive person at heart, and she would notice before anyone else just how shaken and overwhelmed Sephiroth is. For all her own, justified fear, she would try to reach out to him - not only because she of all people knows that if someone had done that in Nibelheim, her village might not have burned; but also simply because it's the kind thing to do.

...whew! I think that's everyone? Or at least I hope so because this is long and I have to go catch a plane now. XD So yeah, not the most dramatic, but hopefully an interesting peek at their reactions anyway!

[casspurrjoybell-29]

Frayed Ties - Chapter 12 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

They headed out together early the next morning, picking an unrushed path down poorly tended streets.

Simon paid no attention to any of the people they passed and little more to Danya until they reached the edge of the city.

Out here there were no towering, occupied buildings, just long abandoned and crumbling houses.

Simon let a long breath out, stretched and looked at Danya for the first time since they'd left the hotel.

"There was... a girl."

"Oh." Danya said.

Those were not words he wanted to hear from the man he was attracted to.

"In the last city we cleared out there were a few survivors, and one of them was a little girl. A mage."

"Oh. Okay."

Not that kind of girl, then.

Probably?

Hopefully.

"It was my job to return her to the facility she'd been taken from. So... I did. I had to, really. Legally she was theirs."

"Of course."

"But they didn't want her back. She wasn't a fancy Companion like you. Just a labourer. After what she'd been through..." He shrugged. "They said she would be more trouble than she was worth. Signed her over to me and gave me some money to cover the euthanasia."

"You didn't have a choice," Danya reassured him but the words felt hollow and his mouth was dry.

Simon turned to look at him, his features pinching up.

"I didn't do it. I didn't have her killed. That was, I wouldn't. But I didn't know what to do."

Danya felt something in him relax.

"Oh. Sorry. What did you do?"

Simon gave him a soft smile.

"Same thing I always do when I don't know what to do. Went to Hamish. And, of course, he did know what to do. He had an aunt who couldn't have children of her own and needed help running her bakery, so that whole thing got a happy ending. But... it made me realise something."

Danya stumbled over a crack in the sidewalk and Simon caught him without even breaking his stride.

"It made me realise that I didn't want to go through that shit again. I wanted to fight alongside people I could trust under all circumstances. If I save someone, even if they're a slave, I want to be surrounded by people who I can trust not to hurt them. I want to be able to do everything I can to help them without having to hide it from people I should be able to trust with my life, unconditionally."

He sighed.

"Does that makes sense? Do you get why I'm so stuck on doing this whole thing with my unit and doing it properly?"

Danya didn't understand why it mattered if it made sense to him but...

"Yes. I understand."

Simon's shoulders relaxed and he nodded, satisfied.

"And then there's Liam."

"You don't think he would help you in that situation?"

"Oh, he would. He definitely would. He has a softer heart than me, in that way. But..."

Simon made a face.

"He likes having a slave."

Something sunk in Danya's stomach at hearing Simon say those words in that tone.

"Don't get me wrong, he treats his slave better than most men treat their wives. He's not cruel. But he loves it. He likes having someone whose whole world revolves around him."

Danya kept his mouth shut and his eyes cast downwards.

What could he say?

He wished Simon felt the same way about owning him.

"He's no revolutionary," Simon continued. "He's an oddity for the military, but when you get down to it he's just a rich guy with a pet he loves. Where it really matters I trust him but damn do I hate him sometimes."

"Cailan doesn't seem unhappy," Danya offered, hoping he wasn't crossing a line.

"Oh, no, I don't dispute that. If it was only them, I wouldn't be so bothered about how they choose to conduct themselves. But it isn't. They're acting as a model for you, demonstrating the least ambitious possible version of happiness."

"I don't know, it seems quite ambitious for us," Danya said, then immediately grimaced at his boldness.

He had forgotten himself for a moment.

"Sorry. That was inappropriate."

Simon laughed.

"No, that was perfect. That was honest."

Danya couldn't help a little smile in return.

"I'm glad you like it. My heart is still beating so hard."

The smile faded from Simon's face.

"It really is that hard for you to just say what you really think?"

Danya shrugged.

Of course it was.

[ptpgunmedia]

Black Aces Tactical Pro Series S Handgun

Though it looks like a shotgun and operates like one, it's not a shotgun. It's a pistol, and what makes it that way is its barrel is less than 18 inches and it has a pistol stabilizing brace. Basically, it's a large handgun, thank you ATF….!

How I came to own this firearm is an interesting story. I came across a Remington, which I think was a VTac or VTac 13, when I was surfing the internet. Later, I went to Hanover Armory, a local gun shop in Hanover, Maryland, and asked about it but what I was given was something very similar, yet different. It was made by Black Aces Tactical, had a price of around 450 to 500 bucks, which was half of the cost of the gun that I was looking for. After I enquired about the Remington and asked if it was worth spending double on the Remington, I was told that though Remington is great, I should try this one, which would probably be just as good, and even cost half the amount. And then I got it sent to my Virginia FFL as I’m a resident in Virginia.

I have mounted a red dot to it - a little cheap Sig Romeo 5. Though it’s not the best sight in the world, it’s not bad, especially for what I’m using it for. It has worked fine with this platform. I also put a Magpul quick disconnect mount on here. So, if I need to, I can run a sling. It has a mount for the quickest net right there as well as in the pistol stabilizing brace. Thus, I can use it as a two-point mount or one at either one, which is nice and cool. It can serve as a decent home defense weapon. Although I wouldn't say it's my go-to, it's definitely fun to shoot on the range when it's not jamming…

One thing about this gun is that it’s definitely very picky on ammo. You can't use some cheap bird shot low brass. But I found that most of the different buckshots that I’ve ran through it works very well. The most you're going to be able to get fit into this shotgun is 2 ¾ inch shell. So, no 3 inch or 3.5 inch shells. I hope to see them bring that in the future models perhaps. As I mentioned earlier, it's very picky on ammo.

Now, I'll show you off of their website what they're saying. A couple of things to remember - this is a handgun. It’s not a short-barrel shotgun, not an NFA item, not AOW at all, about which we will have blog articles on our website. You can find the links in the description below and more about that later. But since this is not an NFA item and not AOW, there's no going through the ATF for approval, and none of the tax stamps, wait times and overpriced fees, which make it a nice buy. And I was able to buy and had it shipped to my Virginia FFL. After getting to the FFL, doing the paperwork, and passing my background check, I was able to have it that day.

Now, a few things they bring up:

It has an overall length of 26.5 inches, which is actually the version that doesn't have the pistol stabilizing brace. It’s 12 gauge. Right now, I don't know if they do 20 gauge but this one, for sure, is 12 gauge. It can hold 4+1 - four shells plus one. They say it likes the cycle light and heavy loads.

They said in a note that the test ammunition used with this was Remington GL 127 low brass and Remington Express Buckshot. They do not know if any other brand of ammunition will function as well and they do not recommend federal low brass with the mid brass height or the O ROI white buckshot.

To be honest – it’s a fun gun to shoot. It can be practical. But I will say, from my experience and with the firearms that I own, this has not going to become one of my home Defense guns as I have better options that I prefer for myself. But I would say you can at least try it out.

If you're thinking about going shotgun but you want something a little bit shorter for going through those close, enclosed spaces and short hallways and doorways, this could work for that. If you're searching for something that’s fun to shoot on the range and show your buddies, this could definitely work for that. If you're just seeking something different to add to the collection, this can work for that too.

Now, a couple of things that they say on their website:

The weight of this firearm is about five pounds. They again stress that it has a barrel length of 14 inches and overall length of 26 and a half, but that's not accounting for the stabilizing brace.

Though different gun shops price things differently, if you spend anywhere from 450 to 550 on this, I don't think it's a bad day. But you need to decide whether that works for you and your needs, and if you've got the extra spending money to blow on a gun that you may not use all the time.

This is a pistol with a stabilizing brace. For those not familiar, we’ve got a video that goes into these more in-depth and shows this as well as the other ones. This is not a stock. This is not made to go in your shoulder. This is made to go around your arm. It encompasses your arm and your forearm area so that you can stabilize your shots if you're shooting one-handed. Again, I'm not a specialist on this but I want to say about three or four years ago, the ATF actually published a white letter that more or less said: This is a pistol. You buy it as a pistol and own as a pistol and you use it as a pistol, but if occasionally, you do shoulder it, it it's not the end of the world. It's still a pistol. You're not breaking any laws.

So, if you wanted to, you can shoulder but it's not made to do that. That is a pistol stabilizing brace, and for more on that, you can click the link in the description below.

Again, it serves as a pistol stabilizing brace, and it can, kind of, serve the role as a stock. It also has a quick disconnect. I use my Magpul three-point sling, which can be going from 1- to 2- to 3-point sling. So, if you have experience with this firearm and own this firearm and have found the secret sauce to its ammunition and what it really likes/doesn't like, put that in the comments below.

Let us know and I might even try some of those on the range try to see if that works well with mine or doesn't work well. I appreciate you all tuning in. I appreciate you all subscribing. If you haven't yet subscribed, hit the subscribe button on our YouTube Channel here. Also, hit the notifications bell. We're putting out several videos every week for your consumption and we also want to hear your feedback on those videos as well as future videos so we can provide the content that you desire. Appreciate you all!

Remember to: Learn. Defend. Prevail.

Original Source: https://www.ptpgun.com/post/black-aces-tactical

[nottoxicfr]

“That’s-!!“

“His face…it’s...familiar?”

“I-it…can’t be…”

"Dr. Emmerich, do you know this man?"

"He's...he's...oh, of course you don't recognize him. It's been over ten years now, hasn't it? You probably wouldn't think of him more than you do the dried blood on your boots, do you?"

"So, you do know him? Is there anything you can tell me?"

"No. Get out of there now!"

"Dr. Emmerich, he has the-!"

"I know he has Subject-07. That's exactly why you need to get out of there! You said he changed, he woke up, because he heard her crying!" "What of it? You don't really think its cries could..."

...

"Gah! Look, I'll tell you everything later. Just get out of there!"

"If he starts fighting again, it'll be to get rid of whatever made her cry. That's just how he is! Besides, you're wounded. You can't fight him like this. Retreat back to my office." "And if he follows me back?"

"That's-! I'm willing to take that risk. Do. Not. Engage. Do you hear me, Jetstream?"

"...I hear you."

This is another part of the Bad End AU thing that happened as a result of conversation with @mewtonian-physics! This one is definitely Raiden.

I had a scene in mind that I made a list for. I just copy and paster it.

Raiden wakes up-

-mfw ten years pass in the blink of an eye and you're no longer bleeding out on a train-

-small blonde child with a gasmask is crying. No idea who she is, looks familiar without a gasmask. why is she wearing a straitjacket? Kids are weird.

-Vaguely recall a mission briefing through coma haze, she's probably important. even if she's not, she's still a crying child and that makes her important.

-Stupid cowboy samurai who cut off your arm a decade ago standing on the other side of the room. Weirdly bloody.

-Small blonde child in the vicinity of violent people/ bad environment for children. Big Brother Mode Activate.

-Say first word that comes to mind? "S-Sunny?" Cyborg throats can't get dry. Somehow, yours is.

-No response. Wrong small blonde child. Whoops? Promptly apologize to small child. No response again. Pick her up.

-Very small. Had no clue they made gas masks this small. Wow. Whatever. Put it back on her face. Stops crying. She has a small blue bunny. It's all bloody now.

-Oh no.

I rewatched all of MGS2 to check if this was within character. I think it sort of is. He's a sleepy guy right now.

Her outfit is a reference. I think small Psycho Mantis looks cool, but it is also related to my plot chart. You'll see on her character chart.

Below this line is exposition about Raiden and what's going on with him.

"Freed from his fate, awoken from his coma-" relates to his mask. Sam cut it, ergo the cut on his face. His consciousness was being suppressed a la Big Boss, but his body was being piloted by a sort of AI made from his accessible memories and instincts. The AI's main method of observation was the mask.

His suit is based on a darker version of his past bodies and suits. specifically the Skull Suit. There's a reason for that of course, but if it were a Metal Gear Game it would be revealed in an unraveling fashion.

I'll follow that and say, memories are funny things. In a broad sense, they're no different from observed data obtained by a machine. It's not just temperature, approximate speed, who and where you are.

Memories are feelings too, moments that embody entire sentiments. You can't just brute force your way through them, or you'd risk distorting them. If you want all the data, the whole memory, you have to unravel them just like any story.

April 29th. The Big Shell. Is there something in those memories worth pursuing?

Anyway, I don't like Sam. If this was a game, then Raiden waking up would be the moment the game switches to his story, rather than Sam's.

I think I'll do the same, because dang he's no fun to write.

There's a Master Post Now

[effervescentdragon]

Another Therapy Session For Me or Thanks, Taylor, You're The Woman

okay so i need to get this out. taylor swift put out all too well 10 min version yesterday, and i watched the short film the moment i woke up and i have something to say

first of all, the song hits on so many different levels, like, the gaslighting of my previous relationship, oh my god. that part with his friends, and how she straightened her hair and wore red lipstick, fuck, i did that. i read everything there was about this 'straight edge' crap his bandmates were into, and i listened to this awful fucking screaming music so that i woyld have something to discuss with them when i was inevitably pulled into their little fucked up band circle. and fuck, im not that into music, im always more into lyrics, but my interests didnt matter. and when i commented on their casual misogyny and how one of his bandmates used to cheat on his wife whenever they went away for a gig, and everyone knew it, i got told that its not like that and i was misinterpreting it and that it was stupid and unimportant, implying that me and my feelings and thoughts were also stupid and unimportant. and my ex was only 2yrs older than me, but his friends were like 6-10 yrs older than that, and it just made me feel so fucking awful.

this song brought back so many memories that i only now realize are so fucked up. girls are always put in these patriarchal structures where its expected of us to seek approval from men who are older and hence depicted as wiser, and that is just such fucking bullshit. (ofc, trans and non-binary people are also put in these kinds of power structure struggles, but here im talking from my perspective as a cis woman who is attracted to men). its like, your worth increases if you get approval from these 'cool older smart dudes', but when time passes, you realize that those dudes are literally fucking wankers with emotional range of a teaspoon who in a way prey on impressionable, younger girls, because in most cases women their age would expect them to, you know. have a job or something, and not spend their days pretending they're metallica in their seventh-rate glorified boy band, but for Real Men and playing Real Music, whatever the fuck that even means.

other point was, that kissing scene between sadie and dylan. holy fuck did that make me uncomfortable, and it took me some time to figure out why, and then i remembered. when i was 17 i had this friend who was some 8 yrs older than me. he was smart, and cool, and seemed like he had life figured out, and we spent ages talking abt politics and philosophy and fantasy (he got me into asoiaf) and i wasnt always as oblivious to romantic stuff as i am now, so i always felt there was some intent there, but something always held me back. i kept telling myself "oh ur so shallow, he may not be the handsomest guy around, but you should give him a chance despite that, bcs hes really nice and kind and smart". and holy fucking god how fucked up is that?! that is fucking patriarchal gaslighting at its fucking WORST, bcs now i realize that wasnt me being shallow. that was me being uncomfortable, the same kind of uncomfortable i felt while i watched that scene and that i felt when he kissed me that one time and i turned away real quick and kinda ghosted him before ghosting was a thing. it was the unconfortable which comes from a twenty six year old man kissing a seventeen year old girl. fuck. just, fucking hell, i didnt even realize how messed up that was, and still is. so like, kudos to my internal alarm going off and not engaging in that kind of relationship. what i think also helped is that my friend at that time 18 was in a relationship with this 29yo dude, and i could feel red flags all throughout that relationship even if i couldnt articulate them, because of whom she turned down a scholarship for oxford and stayed in our shitty little town in the middle of nowhere, only to break up when she was 21. probably too old for him.

so basically i wanna say thanks taylor, for putfing all this into perspective for me. i havent stopped listening to the song for these past two days, and it really, really helps knowing that im not the only one.

[lov3nerdstuff]

Hi Kay!

I just wanted to take a moment and say how deeply moving (and overall comforting) I find your writing to be! I've gone through almost the entirety of your masterlist twice in the past month alone and have found myself returning more often to the pieces of literature/poems your reference sometimes. (Especially that one poem by Benedict Smith! I've read a few more by him because of you and they're just wonderfully lovely 💛 so I'm eternally thankful to you for including it.)

I may be wrong in assuming, but I believe you may have studied/are currently studying a degree involving literature. I hope this isn't too foreward of me but I was wandering if you have any other works of literature that you'd recommend? (I'd love to read anything you recommend from poems to plays 💛) I'm slightly embaressed to say but the works I've read are quite limited to a highschool level and since I'm currently studying Pharmacy, there are very few people who can recommend me such moving works. :)

I also feel like I should apologise for writing such a large ask, so please accept this apology as well hehe 💕🥺

Sincerely,

Bek 🌻

Hey there Bek 💚💕✨

First of all... I'm incredibly sorry for how long it took me to reply to this ask, I know you sent it weeks ago and I'm honestly just ashamed of myself for only replying now! I've been taking a bit of a Tumblr break again, or rather a break from literally everything, and I guess not having written anything in a while made me feel guilty whenever I opened Tumblr, so... All I can say for myself really is that I'm sorry you had to wait so long! Again, I never ever ignore anyone, I promise! It just sometimes takes a while for me to reply 😅🙈

Now, I'm so happy to hear that you've been enjoying my writing! 🥺🥰 Hearing that it's comforting and inspiring to you is honestly such a relief and indeed does make me happy more than I can say 💚 It's so cool that you're checking up on all the references I make aaahhh 🥺🥺🥺 I love it 😁 You're always more than welcome, love! I don't think I could stop including references to literature, culture, history and the science around it even if I tried 😅☺️

And yeah, I did study classics and newer literature as a minor for my undergrad degree 😄 But tbh I still work with literally a lot even now (I'm in grad school for media and cultural studies) even though it's technically not something I've been properly taught ☺️ I'm just a nerd who likes to learn on her own, and with media and culture you can pretty much delve into almost anything you want 😂😅🤷🏻‍♀️

Now, it's not forward at all to ask me for literature recommendations! 😁😃 I truly love recommending stuff!!! I have a few up my sleeve, even though you've probably heard of a few already, for obvious reasons: A lot of what I truly enjoyed reading was something Tom Hiddleston has worked on in one way or another! It's truly a magnificent guideline for picking new literature... Just look up the literary origins of his films/shows/plays and you will be in for quality literature most of the time! I don't think I've ever mentioned it on here, but me reading High-Rise (JG Ballard) because I heard Tom would be partaking in the film adaptation was actually what sparked my love and passion for literature!!! Yep, it's that good. Now on to the recommendations though 😁(This... got rather long):

Plays

Anything by Harold Pinter really, but for obvious reasons you'll find a lot of additionally fun stuff for Betrayal, which is lovely and truly funny if you're in on the kind of humour btw

Medea by Euripides (a classic, but I love it nonetheless... You can find translations in almost every language) ((and pls stay away from Seneca's Medea, because ugh... Euripides is far better AND the og story, as much as anyone can say that for Greek mythology)

La Bohème by Puccini (I know, this is technically an opera, but if you read the libretto it's honestly just like a play... And if you're up for it, the og story is in prose and written by Henri Murger... It's better than the opera, but oftentimes more difficult to find) ((this one is hilarious and basically explains an entire cultural subgroup in the 19th century)

Faust by Goethe (many people hate it, but I LOVE this one!!! It's also been translated into any and every language, and it's so interesting philosophically!!! It's also referenced SO freaking often literally everywhere, and the operas and ballets based on it are always my fave) ((there's technically Faust I and Faust II, but you're good to go just reading the first one)

Anything by Shakespeare, obviously... Though I do love me my Hamlet like every other literature enthusiast (Yes, I can do that one famous soliloquy in act 3 scene 1 by heart as well...)

Poetry

Again, anything Shakespeare for the win, but I LOVE the sonnets and keep a copy of them with me most of the time (Yes, I own multiple copies of the sonnets...) ((My faves are 116 and 91, but there's always so much truth to be found in there!!!))

A lot of the stuff William Blake wrote is amazing, though you have to pick carefully with him if certain religious motives aren't your thing... I love The Tyger, which is an individual poem, and the collection of works called Tyger, Tyger which does have many good ones and a few ones that are a little more on the mediocre side

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas (I know this one by heart as well... It's beautiful, and there's a version of Hiddleston reading it on YouTube, which gives you even more goosebumps than the poem does anyway)

Invictus by William Ernest Henley (same for this one, also read by the one and only) ((I love to read this when I'm feeling down or powerless))

The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T. S. Eliot (This is another wow piece with many quotable lines and truths... I love it a lot and keep coming back to it! It's also a great example of how literary modernism tried to condense the complexity and passing of time and history into a single frame that had to be intrinsically poetical in nature... As in, this poem could've been a short story in any other period, but modernists loved to make everything a poem so here you go)

Der Zauberlehrling by Goethe (This one sucks in all English translations I’ve found, poetically speaking, but in German it’s such a fun piece! If you’ve ever seen the Disney ‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ with Mickey Mouse or listened to the orchestral piece by Paul Dukas, then this poem proves very useful in truly understanding either! But again, the English translation should only be taken for informational value... The German one is also worded hilariously)

Prose

Short edited by Alan Ziegler (This is a collection of short prose forms that honestly is a must for me... I love this book to pieces and have had it for years now! It’s an international anthology, so you’ll find more and less famous authors from all around the world represented with short stories, prose poems, short essays and just curious and interesting snippets of writing! I draw a lot of inspiration from this book)

High-Rise by JG Ballard (As mentioned above, I owe this book part of my personality... I don’t think I would be the same person without having read it. It’s not necessarily full of wisdom, but if you’re interested in a different kind of portrayal of the human condition, then this is the read you need to take a look at)

The City of Dreaming Books by Walter Moers (This is another piece that changed my perception of literature, even though this is a more ordinary and ‘fun’-value read... It’s one of my favourite books and it’s endlessly entertaining! So if the classics are a bit heavy for you, this one is perfect for casual readers as well! Its value really does lie more in the realisation of how fun literature can be, and the freedom you have as an author... So really, I could recommend everything by Moers, his style is amazing both in the German original and in the English translation. Yes, I’ve read both.)

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett (This is comedic gold, stylistic gold and generally a bloody perfect book. Also a ‘fun’-value read, but it also does a magnificent job at showing you what you can do with literature, and how well-developed characters are supposed to be written)

The Penguin Book of the Undead (Penguin Classics) edited by Scott G. Bruce (This book is basically an education on fifteen hundred years of supernatural encounters and how culture wrote, used and perceived them. You get introductory texts for different periods and social groups, explaining how and why ghost stories were written and used, followed by passages of the prime source texts (eg. ancient necromancy shown on The Odyssey). Really, this book is just for cultural history nerds)

The Earthquake in Chile by Kleist (This isn’t necessarily one of my faves, but it has helped me understand what studying literature and culture can do for you. In case anyone remembers my insistence in Wicked Game that you gotta know what a pomegranate symbolises... this novella is such an instance where this knowledge would prove useful. Generally, it gives many opportunities to think about privilege and circumstance)

The Symposium by Plato (You’ll probably not want to read the entire collection of speeches tbh... But the concepts introduced mainly here and in some of Plato’s other work are well worth looking into! For example, the ‘double being’ introduces a concept that in modern fiction is called soulmates... Just sayin’)