#i let them vent to me about the issues
Text
im sorry but saying, “we haven’t had intimate relations” in regards to a roleplay involving a fictional character and making that one of the reasons why you’re upset…like…you are not in a real relationship with MY GIRLFRIEND.
#that shit had me so pissed off#how fucking dare you#make sex a focal point in this rp#and make it seem like it’s extremely important#THEYRE MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND#and i got over my jealousy#like super fast#my gf reassured the few times i needed it#i never made it a problem ever again#i let them vent to me about the issues#i never once interjected or gave advice about them#just let them vent and consoled them#i even tried to stick up for their ex rp partner#but fuck#after one last incident#i just didn’t care anymore#i wish my partner#had dropped them way sooner#because it just caused more pain and trauma for them
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
In case you haven't noticed May has sucked for me so far, anyway *projects onto blorbo*
#anyway haha im back hi#*throws vent art at u*#i dont know if this makes sense with canon. i dont care that much i just needed to throw it out there#but i do sometimes think about. early game tsukasa's anger being so apparent. he got angry quite a few times#and its always been very apparent#but recently he hasnt really shown much anger. at others at least. frustration at himself yes but not really. anger#and i know its also bc hes been doing better and hes got friends and all but. sometimes i wonder if he gets scared of his anger#if he ever gets angry and remembers how it was his rage that ruined wxs the first time#and thinks to himself that he cant let it happen ever again. he cant let anger get the best of him again. he cant hurt his friends again#sorry kasa i have some issues with anger so you have them now too#you can ignore this but i already drew it so why not post it#this got me out of artblock#prsk#prsk fa#prsk art#tenma tsukasa#wxs#wonderlands x showtime#kerizart
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
on liking girls
#comic#vent art#other fandoms#the fandom is my personal life LMAO#I had posted this on twitter and deleted it because it was vent art from back in like. Ohhh I forget. Must have been january#Like I had just had my birthday and I don't know what it was but something made me realise like#oh. I haven't come out to my parents#like it's Been a minute I probably should right#and my parents are like. the best in the world I say that with my whole chest#my sexuality is not something they would ever care about let alone judge me for#like they have so many gay friends OBJECTIVELY I KNOW THIS IS A NON ISSUE LOL#but I don't know. something about it DOES feel dangerous and I can barely come to terms with it#I hate the idea of making it a "thing'. does that make sense#i don't want it to be a “thing”#I don't want them to tell me they'll love me no matter what and that this doesn't change anything#I don't want to have to subject them to feel like I'm “opening up” and then Have to respond like that#I wish it felt like as natural of an integration as someone is being straight you know#i wish it was: i come home with the prettiest girl in the world (she is the prettiest because she is my girlfriend) and they're just like#“hi! so nice to meet you! lets sit for tea!”#and thats it no questions asked. my mom or dad wouldn't ask “why didnt you tell us?” does that make sense#This is why none of my highschool friends know either#i'll tell them if they ask but I don't want to make a performance of Telling Them#I don't. Owe them that#I don't owe anyone a heads up. I don't want to. I don't want to make it A Thing#It's a Me thing. I don't get why it has to be turned into a You thing.#also hi if you havent seen my face i look like That LOL
138 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lol totally not planning my post-semester attention grab isolation to make my friends have to Intentionally reach out and show they care and want me around and also to show that I don't need them and would be fine without them
#time is a circle and so are my friendship issues#like damn. im annoying and too rude and talk too much and too loud and all that shit? crazy. lets see if you care if i didappear then#idk. im just pissed.#the biggest thing lately has been like. they have Decided that im just an asshole and ive tried explaining that im usually not trying to be#i just cant control my tone that well and their response has been Well maybe u should control your tone better.#ftr these friends are all also autistic...#and i was complaining to them about an admin being an asshole to me over smth small and they were like well u were probably sounding rude#then the same admin pulled the same shit on them and they were so pissed#like can i not be afforded the tiniest benefit of the doubt. can you maybe for one fucking second stop asserting that im a total dick and#just listen. or care. just something. they always assume shit like that is my fault and then when i get pissed abt it its further evidence#that im an asshole in their eyes. like no!!! i just have to be pissed because its fucking clear nobodys going to be pissed on my behalf#anyway.#npd#actually npd#actually narcissistic#vent tw
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
am i so hard to care about?
#i need to vent and i know u guys cant stand me because i can feel it (and certainly from the anon hate) but i think im gonna have an ulcer#if i dont put this out somewhere#SH s*icide tw !!!!!#i need some advice or opinions because i feel like im losing it#i dont understand why my friends cant care about me#i know !!! i know i seem out of touch and insane because i say this so often and the question to someone reading would come natural: maybe#it is just ur perception…. maybe u suck ass as a friend too#and i do ponder about that!!!!!! i take those possibilities into consideration i do. and i genuinely dont think i suck as a friend. i always#check in. if they seem off i ask how they feel. i ask updates on their stuff. i dont think i deserve this tbh#but especially when i am struggling they just disappear#like even when i reach out and let them know im doing bad. they clearly read my measages and choose to ignore them#these are supposed to be my best friends#these days ive been so bad. and trigger warning again#i just feel so suicidal and i have been hurting myself in the desperate attempt to cope and manage these thoughts#and i dont tell them these things#i dont share the details because 1) it is too much to dump on someone and 2) they dont show any interest even on the surface level of my#problems so i just wouldnt tell them the deeper issues#i am just in so much pain. and i also feel a lot of anger because of their behavior. i feel so so hurt by it. so many years of this going on#of them just not even acknowledging my struggles while i was in the midst of them and trying still to support them and be there for e#whatever they had going on. and getting nothing in return#i hate that i feel so angry but i do. and ive been swallowing this anger and pain for so long i feel it eating my insides#even my therapist doesnt understand why i am friends with people that dont care about me#i dont know what i should do#i want to say something#actually i already talked about this to one of them one year ago exactly and i told her all these things and she just said she didnt know#why i was ignored. and then still kept being a part of it#the thing is i am so upset and my mental health is so so so bad. i am supposed to spend new years eve with them in two days but i dont know#how i can do that feeling like this#but if i speak to them about it i think it will also ruin the mood#if someone has any thoughts or advice it would be very welcome….
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
>.<
#tw clari overshares#i really need to start making new friends on here and being more active#but the issue is just the mere *thought* of that fucking terrifies me#just typing out that single sentence has my heart pounding and my hands shaking and my stomach churning#i really wish i was kidding or over-exaggerating#i want so badly to make new friends and be active in a little community on here again#but i’m so so so scared#(of what?????????? of what!!!!!!!!!!!)#bring me back to 2020 clari who talked to people despite the anxiety and was so damn active and was having an absolute blast!!!#what happened to her!!!!!#she got really sick i guess#it’s crazy like sometimes i just scroll through my archive and i can SEE it#i can see myself getting sicker and sicker and withdrawing more and more#feeding into the fear and letting it win#and now i’m here#in this hole that i’m going to have to claw myself out of IN SPITE OF the terror i feel#i miss being a part of this community so much#i miss being able to post little drabbles willy nilly and not having breakdowns over them not being perfect#NOT obsessing over my own work and flaws it may have#i miss having fun#YES my writing is extremely important to me and YES i want to one day write for a living in some capacity#but since when did that mean i had to cut everyone off??? seclude myself in a protective little bubble???#the only person who can fix this is me#(obviously hahaha)#it’s about time i put on my big girl pant(ie)s and faced that fear head on#i’m so sick of it dominating and controlling so much of my life#why did i let it take something so fucking important to me???#i have to end it!!!#if u got this far in the tags: thank you and i’m sorry for venting#i just feel like i NEED to say this
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#tw trauma#venting#i know it's been over two years now and i should probably stop thinking/talking about this#but i can't get over how my ex behaved towards me despite knowing my past and trauma#how he kept pushing my boundaries and making me feel bad for even setting them despite very well KNOWING my reasons#like this dude KNEW about my past and STILL behaved this way#how he wanted me to “get help for my issues” but only as a disguise to get what HE wants#telling me that if i didn't get a therapist within the next year he'd break up#i forced myself to do things i never wanted and now deeply regret#i set a boundary and could watch it being ignored weeks later#when i broke up with him he wished terrible things for me and told me to fuck myself#and even after that he kept on trykng to contact me on every possiblr social media months after#last time he contacted me was in july this year.....we broke up OVER 2 YEARS AGO#i'm glad i left but i have so much unresolved shit that i just cannot let it go#like that shit sits deep#this is so much oversharing i'm so sorry#will probably regret posting this and delete but i had to get it out#can't keep annoying my friends with this#again sorry
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#horrible awful no good very bad day#apparently last night the apartment below ours caught fire and we were out of town#and we didnt find out til several hours later from our neighbor who had to track me down on facebook- we didnt hear a thing#from the apartment in any official capacity until like? 10 hours after the fire?#anyway we rushed home supremely early from a friend trip that was like#meant to be very good and fun#anyway so we rush home because no one can tell us if our cats are okay#and they were but our whole apartment is supremely smoky and all of our possessions are extremely smoky#and we cant stay there or let the cats stay there because of the smoke and soot and particles it just doesnt feel safe#so now im in my partners familys house which is like#fine but its full of people and i dont feel fully comfortable and i cant fully relax and and and and and etc etc etc etc#and tomorrow i have to wake up early and go over there and find out what if anything the complex plans to do about it and how long its gonna#be until we can come back safely. or more likely get more noncommittal answers and be unsure#and i dont know how long i can stay here and be normal#AND to top it all off i paid like 60$ to go to an aquarium i didnt even get to go to . but yknow. all of my friends got to !#and like im happy for them but no one was excited as i was and now i get to ruminate on how everyone got to do the fun thing i love#while i was stuck doing 17 loads of laundry and bathing the soot out of my cats fur in someone elses house#certainly it could be worse and im glad my cats are fine and im glad its just smoke damage and not yknow. Burn damage#but im having a sad little pity party anyway because i was supposed to have an amazing beautiful day ending in a relaxing evening#in my own home#and now i have to cope with all of this instead. all i want to do is cry#and also like. im scared we will have to move#but im also scared we wont... because like#i think it was a gas issue. and knowing that that happened in my building? and also knowing how much landlords love to halfass#repairs and everything else#i just dont know how safe i will feel there#even if they tell me its fine#anyway sorry for the tag vent post again my old ways will never die#ghost posts
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
damn that talking about your feelings shit really does Suck Tremendously huh.
#j.txt#vent#sorry all i post about in my life is stupid personal Issues and Problems.wish I weren't so fucking ill in the head but it's a life isn't it#finally Kind of Somewhat brought up one of the things thats been really bothering to my roommate. only after having a weird#passive-aggressive ish convo w other roommate. and maybe im just being so aggro and overdramatic for no reason thats entirely a possibility#but I did finally bring up that they Extremely rarely let me know when/if things are happening and when they do it's with barely any notice#or time left for me to prepare the way I need to to deal with whatever the situation is. And that she in particular keeps just. imagining I#guess. or at least Not Communicating well within them. conversations with me abt if I would like to be included in things#anyways. some of what needed saying was said and I only teared up a little bit so👍 now if only I didnt feel so wretched-#stupid-guilty-resentful about it lol. time to avoid thinking abt *** over it for the foreseeable future<3 Anyways
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
the way i have absolutely no business being the way i am
#horse.txt#vent //#sort of. too high to be sad abt it im in anthropology mode and listening to music that makes me feel sexy so its fine yk#anyway i typed a whole bunch of other tags talking abt how and why i feel this way by going through a few of the events i can remember#from my childhood that Might explain why im so emotionally guarded and struggle to open up anymore.#bc i Wanted to say they all felt dumb and juvenile esp since ive actually like#made peace with most of the ppl who were involved with them#but the Anthropology mode was just tearing it all down as i typed it bc that Is just a ridiculous way to look at it no matter how you cut it#doesn't matter that nobody involved really Meant to deal that kind of harm and i dont need to hate or blame anyone in order to acknowledge#that it still just Happened. like thats a Memory already babe no do overs.#which is kind of just accidental therapy so sick. love that fir me genuinely!#but also yes theres the bitch part of me that still wants to discredit it bc acknowledging that it happened =/= Fixing My Issues#so im still at square one technically. ive just been pacing in circles on it for a while ig#EVEN WORSE that the Scale of my issues is so incredibly mundane compared to so many of the people i seem to meet.#sitting in bed crying abt not having friends for a few days in elementary school when other ppl have jojos bizarre adventure levels of Lore#i know im not technically invalid for feeling the way i do or anything but god. if it doesn't feel fucking Embarrassing to open up about😭#its impossible NOT to feel stupid and sensitive for having these first world ass problems. And letting them hold me back#bc ppl not liking me for any reason makes me sooooooooo fucking scared So fucking scared its not even funny 😝#at least. ppl in my Circles. im pretty ok about being assertive with randos#still some work to be done on it but its better than whatevers going on with my personal relationships rn#sincerely to my mutuals and loved ones who see this i swear to GOD i love you so so so fucking much and im so. im trying to figure out this#the stuff thats got me so distant and bad at keeping in touch. its a whole slew of feelings about how i see Myself--not yall#i double pinky promise cross my heart im extremely serious#thank you for being patient with me you mean more to me than im capable of putting into words right now#alright theres a shot of tears in the hollow of my collar bone time to wrap up this post#daily reminder that i love body hair. there's some honesty.#����😎😎��💪💪#the Quaritch under the cut is just to make me feel better bc i love him and i think hes so pretty. hes like a security blanket
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
it's tag venting time
#i've had this friendship. of like. 5 years#and well#we used to be really really close#and in hindsight i guees it was because we literally saw each other for 8 hours straight every day of the week#and then that stopped happening#i literally haven't seen this person in about a year and a half i think? maybe more?#despite the fact that we basically live walking distance from each other. which. already says a lot#but then there's also a bigger issue. because hey i get it we're both busy ppl it's okay if qe haven't seen each other in a while#(despite the fact that in this case it is because of a lack of trying -i like to believe not on my part- but ignoring that)#we text sporadically when we have something to let off our chest so it's like this back and forth of voice notes every week or so#but lately its has turned into them sending me groups of 5-minute voice notes at a time because their life is so. so dramatic#and like. hey if this were still like a mutual communication i would enjoy it because i am indeed a good listener#and i like to believe i guve good advice. and i used to give this person good advice like. it was a nice friendship back then#but it became so one-sided as in i received info dumps and vents about the same stuff over and over and the few times i talked about myself#i received some half-hearted dismissals like. oh cool or oh that's so sad. anyways. and then we went back to talking about them.#and it was so frustrating but at first i thought well if they're gonna use me as a venting device so will i despite getting no input like#they became a void to me which i was getting gradually accustomed to it was fine. but then today they asked if i could talk on the phone#i said yes because i wanted to prove my theory. the plan was: i answer#let them talk without offering any input whatsoever. see how long they can just talk and talk and then in the end see if my lack of answer-#-elicited any reaction at all. and unsurprisingly it didn't. i waited for them to finish and then i thought#well at least they might ask me how my day was or something just to confirm i was listening like idk but#i personally would find the quiet unsettling and would ask.but they didn't even do that. asked me if i had homework i said yes. that was it#that was IT!!! i felt so frustrating but at least i was entirely correct and it does hurt to lose a friend but this had been coming#for a long long time. the thing is though i cant just cut this person off#i hate confrontation so all i cant do is keep up this sort of a 'quiet quitting' kind of attitude. pretty easy to do with someone like this#so anyway. that's how you realize a friendship is fake and now i am a bit angry and also sad. but i guess i'll deal with it and move on#if you read all this hi and sorry for the venting. i just had to get it off my chest#vent post
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I actually really fucking hate how anything in my schedule not going the way I initially Intended For It To just automatically makes me a massive fucking crybaby and or a raging bitch. Like dude. The grocery store does not hate me. It sucks that my schedule requires me to get there an hour earlier no matter what but like. They didn’t do that to me. Why am I always so upset whenever I have to change plans. I change plans too! I’m a living person!!! Why am I so fucking upset about this!!!!!!
#personal#im gonna delete this later I’m just venting#I’m also fine I’m just having a rough day and I can’t figure out why my emotions have been so fucking volatile. It’s so frustrating that#I can’t figure out how to get a handle on my emotions. I know I need to feel things but the problem is if I let myself feel them too much#Then I’m going to spiral or lash out at some random bystander and both of these make the initial feeling worse#I just can’t pull myself out of that quickly enough recently. It’s not an issue of ability bc I can. I just can’t do it.#wait that’s contradictory. I’ve been really struggling too recently. There we go. There’s accuracy.#Either way. Didn’t I spend all year in therapy last year trying to get this shit together? What the fuck.#Why is it the second I show a modicum of progress I immediately hit a single pebble on the road and get sent ass over teakettle#Progress isn’t linear but it also sure as hell isn’t meant to be a time loop. That I’m pretty sure of.#God everything’s just been so difficult this year. Shit that used to be almost instinctual to me now is a nightmare.#Maybe it’s growing pains and I guess that’s valid but how long do I have to have them#The good news is that thus far I have not snapped at anyone so at least right now we don’t have any casualties of my bad attitude#I feel so bad being so worried about that but like seriously no one needs me to be snapping at them. Even if I feel catharsis in the moment#We all feel bad immediately afterwards#It’s literally not even been a bad day today. I cannot emphasize how this has been the only problem today. Literally so much good happened#Ugh#dont look at me
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i had ONE decent interaction with another person and now i want to ask my friends to come hang out. however, i literally never left my house once covid started, and the few friends/acquaintances i chatted with, as soon as i saw them on person, i very strongly disliked them.
i have one friend.
#puts my head in hands………#also i think she may hate me. so. :(.- I SAY THIS NOT TO VENT. I DO NOT FEEL ANYTHING !!!!!!#i just think u all need to sympathize with how difficult it is to go find fwends#-oh my god im already facing the adult issue of unable to make friends bc of lack of interaction with others#i. the body is still not close to 18. ….. …………#gently whacks andrew. damn bitch who did u let take care of this thing why ur life in shambles?? (totally not my fault)#edit. anyways should i reach out to my friend and try to get her to hang out uhhhh… some time later this week ?#or do i try and contact the person i was around the other day. i’ve known her since like 4th grade but idk if i should call her a friend#we had a fine interaction but it was literally like… four hours after my lesson and before her date. and she just wanted to hear about my#trip. which did in fact take four hours to discuss#so it’s like hmmm do i want to be around her for longer in a unstructured setting-#HER STUPID BF IS SO RICH AND ITS SO INFURIATING TO HEAR ABOUT#THEYRE SO WASTEFUL WITH THEIR MONEY ITS INSANE !!!!!!!!#it makes me so like. ticked off. tf do u mean they last-minute booked u a flight across the country so u could come w them#to the fucking PENINSULA UR BFS GRANDMA O W N S. WHAT ???????#i’m trying to be vague. but this peninsula is in a /nice/ fucking area like if i were to say it y’all would immediately know what i’m#talking about. like uhh. cape cod martha’s vineyard that type of infamy. owns a whole ass peninsula………..#i HATE IT i HATE RICH PEOPLE !!!
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
My mom just shared that at 22, her partner, had told her he couldn't touch doorknobs, "I didn't listen at all to those stories. I was only 22, I had no idea about OCD"
I knew what OCD was by 7. I learned more accurately about this disorder (and manifold more) through social media and Google years later (I know those sources are not equivalent to professional ones don't need to tell me)
What I'm saying is, gen-z has made leaps of progress happen for mental health education. We are way more educated about mental health than our parents.
It is bittersweet cause it creates a gap between generations. How are you supposed to talk about self-harm when your parents think it is only a thing suicidal people do? Educating about such topics is particularly exhausting cause they don't really believe you. Anyway.
Congrats gen-z
#generational gap#every now and then I am remind that millenials dont have the slightest idea about a lot of disorders#they are ableist as hell as well#like not believing me when I say a character is displaying a behavior common in autisitics#cause 'he wouldnt be talking to people if he was'#sigh#i dont have the patience to educate#also cause my own knowledge is superficial#to convince I would have to make research#and they wouldnt listen to it anyway#cause it doesnt interest them#they dont even know the word ableism#lets tag this as#vent#but yeah this is one of the biggest generational gap I have encountered#they are more knowledgeable of trans issues than ableism#small mercies they know about that at least
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
whyyyyyyyyyy do my relatives act like my very clear memory issues are very personally directed towards them and that i hate them in particular and forget everything they say on purpose or ignore commands that i acknowledged because they're "not important enough for me to remember". DO YOU THINK. I want to piss you off on purpose. Do you really think I have something against you in particular so I choose not to do a simple thing you told me to do to anger you?????? What. What do I gain by doing that. I've been like this my whole life. MAYBE it's not up to me!!!!!
#rant#or vent#or whatever i don't know#murk talk#I've had so many. what do i even call them#'issues' let's say. ever since i was little.#and if you can't teach me out of them maybe they're something that i can't do anything about#just tell me directly or remind me or whatever i don't know
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
my mental health hasnt been this bad in years
#fucks sake#negative#like i finally fucking talked to my friends about all my dnd problems but i feel like none of them were recieved at all#i talked at them and they nodded and said nothing in response for like 2 hours#and i expected them to be better but they forgot everything said in the talk except for the one person who needed it lwast#least*#you'd think this wouldve fixed my issues but it didnt#and now i feel like my relationship is falling apart with my roommate every time i try and vent about my lack of creativity#or will to be creative i suppose#and at the end of the day it fucking makes me want to kms for the first time since i fucking moved out#its just easier to let go of my damn campaign at this point maybe ill fucking feel sane again
2 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
rapidoyfurioso9-ver
Rapido y furioso 9 película completa Subtitulada
sasi24hrs
Untitled
indefidelity
Willpower
kyarapattikawa
Kyara Pattikawa
maxwellscorner
Sleepy Drawings