#i like laptops because i can say i'm done. and get that satisfying close laptop clack

[summoning-potema]

this week in "what am i doing in the sims" i'm rebuilding addie's farmhouse 🧍‍♂️ i felt bad that everyone was crammed into their little apartment so i moved them and made marnie and jas part of the fam finally.

it's so cute so far ;_; and yeah everyone is outside in the rain including baby poppy in the mud

i think, where i went wrong before, was building her shack first and then adding on and not thinking about where i was going. so now i'm starting from big ass house that holds everyone comfortably and thennn i'll work my way down to shack

[hornychristianprincess]

wasted (leehan x fem reader) pt 3

paring: leehan x fem reader genre: smut, fluff, angst, fuckboy!leehan word count: 15k bc i'm a slut for this man SRFKLHSDLK summary: everything in your life is affected as your relationship with leehan progresses. warnings: explicit sex scenes, oral (male and female receiving), expressions of insecurity and self-esteem issues should you wish to read on ao3, click HERE.

At the library on a Saturday night, you, Leehan, Riwoo, and Giselle sit at the same table, studying for your approaching midterms. 

“Y/N,” says Leehan. “Can you send me the pdf file you found for the English textbook?”

You nod, quickly finding the file on your phone and airdropping it to Leehan the Lion . “Just sent it.”

“Thanks,” he mutters, before returning to writing notes on his laptop. 

This is about as exciting as your interactions get with Leehan when you’re among your group of friends, studying or going to the caf or finding some event on campus to go to. 

It was the ultimate whiplash, then, to experience Leehan when you were alone. 

Because in the month or so that’s passed since the night of the lunar eclipse, every few days you could look forward to the what are you doing? text that usually led up to some of the most satisfying, passionate sex of your life.

The friends-with-benefits arrangement the two of you were in had quickly become the center of your life. It felt like you were always in limbo as you awaited his latest text, and when you got it, it didnt’t matter what you were doing – you were always ready to surrender to him, to surrender to pleasure that was beginning to feel like the only thing that made you excited to wake up some days.

You had sex sometimes three, sometimes five times a week. Where it happened didn’t really matter to either of you — in the bathroom at a party, the confines of your dorm room, in the backseat of his car. 

Everything in your life had been shrunken to make space for what was now your top priority. 

And whatever negative impacts were to come of such decision-making were yet to be seen when it felt like the high you received from his attention was blinding everything else.

It was always weird to have to face him in settings like this the next day, to hear him speak to you so casually as if his face wasn’t buried between your legs less than 24 hours ago. Still, you kept up your end of this unspoken bargain to pretend as if you weren’t anything but acquaintances.

“I have midterms for every class. I’m feel like I’m gonna die of stress,” said Giselle, throwing her long brown hair over her shoulders. Giselle was one of the people who rode with Jaehyun during the lunar eclipse, and although you didn’t get much time to speak with her then, you’ve since gotten close by hanging out more. 

“That’s why you need to find the right vice. Food…drugs… orgasms, ” replies Leehan playfully, quirking a teasing eyebrow in her direction. He chuckles as Giselle rolls her eyes at him, and as much as you hate yourself for it, you can’t help but notice how his eyes linger on her even as she returns to her textbook.

Occasionally, you’ll observe the fact that the sense of humor and charm that made you fall for Leehan in the first place is not something that he reserves for only you, and it makes you just the tiniest bit sad. 

It’s nice to feel, even if it’s not true, like the moments you share alone in your bedroom are ones where he feels safe to show you things no one else gets to see. Like you hold the key to pieces of Leehan that no one else can access. 

So in times like these where you’re presented with evidence that says otherwise, it makes you feel like there is nothing special or significant about how you and Leehan got to where you were. Perhaps it was just a case of right place right time, like he could’ve met anyone – Giselle, even –  and done the same things he’s done with you.

Then again, the interaction you just observed could’ve been completely innocent and it’s you that’s overthinking it.

At the end of the day, if you were keeping score, the fact that you’re the first person with whom Leehan has offered up his body to on a regular basis feels like more than enough evidence that what you share is special.

In fact, you’re pretty sure he’s gonna fuck you after this.

You know because in the hour or so later when the library is about to close and you’re wrapping up your study session, he says, “Y/N, you live near the mail center, right? I’ll walk with you; I need to drop something off before I head home.”

It takes every bit of self control you have to not break out into a smirk – he knows exactly where you live, and it’s because you fuck there almost every time. “Sure,” you reply, in the most neutral voice you can possible muster.

“See you guys later,” you’re saying to Riwoo and Giselle as you pack up your things and head out. 

It’s past midnight and almost completely dark outside by the time you and Leehan leave, save for the few street lights that illuminate the sidewalk. For no reason in particular, it’s silent between the two of you. You might’ve found such an atmosphere to be awkward if it weren’t for the fact that your dorm was only a 5 minute walk away. And, when it comes to Leehan, you can never be too presumptuous in trying to interpret his moods; being the person that he is, something you’d usually interpret as disinterest could actually mean a plethora of non-threatning things for him.

On the way there, you approach what’s essentially an alleyway, a narrow space between two dorms that is deserted and dark. You don’t think anything of it until suddenly, you’re tugged inside of it and everything in your line of sight goes dark.

And before you can ask questions or react, your senses are flooded by the feeling of Leehan’s lips pressed against yours.

It’s amazing how your body adapts to the sudden gesture before your mind does. While it takes you a moment to internally acknowledge that you’re not in danger, your skin ignites with electricity the moment his lips touch yours. 

If a bystander were to observe the passionate, needy, almost desperate way he’s kissing you, they’d think that you’re someone he hasn’t seen in years, someone who he’s eager to make up lost time with. 

He doesn’t stop at just dominating your mouth with his tongue. His hands, like calloused vines, wrap themselves around your body, setting fire to whatever pieces of exposed skin he can find. And when you whimper against him, he adds to the sound with a groan of his own.

But no, this isn’t a kiss of two lovers who have been separated by time, or location. Leehan is just a person who is steadfast in his commitment to doing everything in his life earnestly. And it’s one of the many reasons why you are enamored by him.

When he pulls away to look at you, you can see even in the dark the expression of relief on his face. It’s as if kissing you was an urge he has been suppressing until now, and having gotten his fix, he’s left in a state of contentment.

“What was that for?” you ask, adrenaline and arousal running through your veins in such an fiery combination that you find your voice comes out weaker than usual.

“Just had to get it out my system,” is what he says indifferently in reply, and with his lips curling into a smirk, he heads out of the alleyway and continues on the path to your dorm. You follow him, feeling like the arousal you had been suppressing the entire time you were at the library with your friends has now doubled in a way that makes your knees wobbly as you walk.

It’s silent between the two of again as you approach the building to your dorm, although now you feel confident in assuming that it had always been searing sexual tension that was keeping him from being his usual talkative, bubbly self. 

It could be confusing to someone else, then, why — even as you’re locking the door to your room with him inside of it – you still aren’t all over each other in the way your earlier interactions might’ve preluded. 

But it’s because you just have one more confirmation you need to make before you can truly let go of your inhibitions, and that’s the question of, “Is your roommate here?”

Your roommate, lovely girl, would usually be here in the dorm at this time. But already having a feeling what you’d be getting up to tonight, you transparently informed her through text that im so so sorry but i’m out with you know who and i could reallllyyy use some dick tonight. buy you food to make up for it? just before you left the library.

“No. She’s out studying,” you tell Leehan. 

When you meet each other’s gazes, Leehan’s eyes sparkling as if he’s just been told he’s won the lottery, you can sense the exact moment when the both of you realize there’s no longer a need to wait. And so, like animals excitedly tearing up freshly-killed prey, it’s in a messy, rushed flurry of movements that you both take each other’s clothes off. 

Before Leehan, you don’t think you ever experienced an attraction for someone so intense that it caused you to push furniture over in the process of trying to get to the bedroom. But with him, the sound of a glass vase breaking doesn’t feel so concerning when you’re too busy trying to make it to the bed, take off his clothes, and not break your kiss all at once. 

There’s something so humorous about your shared vigor, causing you to both smile into the kisses you share, remaining playful even among such intensity. 

“You’re roommate’s a lovely person, isn’t she?” he remarks as he backs you up into your bedroom doorframe, throwing the jacket you had been wearing on your rug in the process. “I’ve gotta apologize to her one day. Poor girl’s had to hear so many things.”

You hate how much his words ring true, because truthfully, tonight was one out of several rare occasions in which you’ve been given enough foresight to warn your roommate before Leehan comes over. Other times, things between you two have blossomed too spontaneously for a warning, or, your phone died while you were out together, giving you no means to let her know he was arriving. 

“ Ew . Don’t talk about her like that. It’ll make me think you have a thing for her,” you reply in reference to the lovely person and poor girl attributions, and although you’re mostly joking, the insecurity from before about his interest in other women still remains present in the forefront of your mind.

And it’s not at all helped when, even jokingly, he makes remarks like, “Hey — I’d never say no to inviting someone else into our activities.”

At this point, you’re standing in nothing but a bra and panties in front of him, preparing to give your body up for his pleasure, which is why you think it’s fairly reasonable that you reach out to swat him in response to such cheekiness. 

But he seizes your wrists before you can make contact, laughing at your reaction in that way that, as annoying as it is to acknowledge right now, makes him look so, so sexy. “I’m kidding, baby,” he chides apologetically. “I’d never share you. Want you too fucking badly to even think about it.”

It’s in moments like these that you can’t help but get butterflies from Leehan, especially when he leans in to kiss you languidly right after. This habit he’s taken of calling you all sorts of pet names, from princess to baby to sweet girl, is something that has made your attraction to him increase tenfold. 

How could you help it, when his deep voice by itself is like a weapon specifically designed to torture you?

“Are you needy, baby?” asks Leehan teasingly, as his hand is now stuffed in your underwear, and his forehead is pressed against yours as he pushes you against the hard surface of your dresser and fingers you expertly. “Was what we did two days ago not enough? Did I not fuck you good enough?”

It’s actually because the sex from two days ago – and the day before that and the day before that and the days since you met him – was too good that you find yourself needing little stimulation to get wet at the thought of fucking him again. But of course, you don’t admit this, not needing his ego to get any larger than it is. “Shut up and fuck me.”

But Leehan doesn’t pay your cheek any mind, reacting only with a scoff as he busies himself with getting on his knees in front of you. Pressing his face against the skin of your bare stomach, he remarks, “You smell like me. It’s so fucking sexy.”

Leehan is the most wayward person you’ve ever met. But you can surely count on him in moments like these to make your entire body feel like it’s on fire, knowing exactly what buttons to push and places to touch to get a rise out of you. All he does is leave chaste, delicate kisses along the skin from your sternum to your belly button, but the fact that he maintains eye contact as he does it, and the implication that he makes when he says, “And I bet you taste like heaven, too,” makes you feel like you’re experiencing something so ethereal it’s as if you’re out of your own body.

You’re looking down at him as he kisses at the spot just above your pussy, and it’s at that moment that you decide you want him too badly to wait any longer. Fingers that had once laced themselves in his hair now tug on the strands, pulling him up and off of you. “Leehan. Inside of me. Now.”

You watch as his eyes scan your face to tell if you’re being serious or not, and if you could see yourself through his gaze, you know you’d be convincingly earnest in your desire to have him. Once he confirms this for himself, he pops up from his previous position kneeling on the ground, and looks at you with his head cocked to the side in a expression of challenge. Pushing you up onto the dresser, he quirks an eyebrow to say, “Have I ever told you that I find you sexiest when you’re telling me what to do?”

At this, you smile, playing into his confession by commanding, “Kiss me,” before leaning in to meet his lips. And when his hand travels between your legs, you know it’s not to touch you, but to reach into the top drawer of your dresser where you’ve allowed him to stash some condoms. It’s with excitment that you hear him tear open the package, sliding the latex onto his hardened cock.

There’s a moment just before he lines his cock up with your slit where he pulls away from your lips, reaching a hand out to hold your jaw in place so that your eyelines are level. And when he simply just stares at you silently, allowing his eyes to graze your features with an awe-stricken expression on his face, you can’t help but look away as the intensity of his admiration becomes overwhelming.

He chuckles at your obvious shyness, hand never leaving your jaw as he continues to view you like you’re a delicate statue he’s entranced by. “Don’t you think it’s too late to be shy after everything we’ve done together?” he says jokingly, and even though you feign disagreement with a roll of your eyes, you make no effort to suppress the smile that appears on your face as you bask in his teasing of you.

“I can’t help it,” you reply, comfortably meeting his gaze now. “You’re just really fucking handsome.”

You’re sure he’s heard these words hundreds of times in hundreds of ways, and yet you can see his eyes-widening as if you’ve said something sincerely touching. Perhaps the words hit differently when heard spontaneously, genuinely, without any pretense behind them.

It’s without any warning that Leehan pushes himself inside of you. Caught off guard by the feeling of his cock entering you inch by pleasurable inch, you can only make a mental note to apologize to him later as your fingernails dig into the skin of his back. Luckily, he doesn’t seem to mind, too focused on leaning his forehead against yours and watching with greedy eyes as his cock enters your pussy and leaves it with a creamy sheen. 

“Jesus fucking christ, Y/N,” he remarks in awe, managing the words through a shaky exhale as he moves to hook his arms underneath your thighs. He pulls your body closer to the edge of the dresser, bringing his cock even deeper inside of you. He hasn’t even started fucking you properly yet, and still you let out a series of elongated sighs and moans, wrapping your arms around his neck for a sense of comfort.

It’s when you’re completely pressed together in a skin-to-skin embrace that he finally begins to thrust inside of you at a pace that you’re used to. As clumsy and unsure as he can sometimes be, Leehan never fucks you erratically. It’s always with a controlled, focused pace that he pistons his hips into yours, knowing your body so well that you never have to tell him when to slow up or go faster. 

When you first met Leehan, you couldn’t understand the concept of kissing being considered an intimate act between two lovers. 

But now, as he leans in to press his mouth against yours, his tongue exploring the depths of your mouth, it’s with suprsing clarity that you realize why some people like to refrain from kissing entirely when they hook up with someone. 

You’re at your most smitten when being passionately tongue-kissed through an unforgiving onslaught of thrusts, a part of you wishing that this sex could become a permanent fixture in your life and not just a transactional, temporary high.  

It’s only when he slots a hand between your bodies to tweak at your clit that it becomes impossible for you to meet his kiss, feeling too much pleasure to hold back your open-mouthed cries. Leehan then moves to kissing your neck, and it’s some of the most sensual affection you've ever received as he allows his tongue to drag across your skin, suctioning his lips on sections of your shoulder where you’re sure he’s leaving hickies. 

He goes up your body in this sequence until he reaches your ear, mumbling, “You take care of my cock so well,” as he licks at the shell of your ear and sinks his teeth onto your earlobe. “It’s why I’m never coming off of you. It’s too fucking good for me to stop.”

Transfixed by the sound of his voice, the feel of his cock, and the stimulation you receive on your clit, you can feel that it’s only a matter of time before your pleasure reaches it’s crescending point. “Leehan,” you mumble out, grabbing onto fistfuls of his long hair as if it’s the only thing keeping you tethered to Earth. “Come with me.”

He denies this request with a click of his tongue, mumbling the words, “You first,” into your ear as his thrusts increase in impact. It’s in a sad attempt at a kiss that you press your mouth against his, feeling his intensity and passion just as the same even as you devolve into just grazing your tongue against his mouth. 

Your orgasm hits you in a feeling that’s akin to a bunch of puzzle pieces fitting perfectly together at once; the combination of his cock, his closeness, and his endless circling of your clit leaves your body seizing with what is surely one of the most pleasurable feelings of your life. 

And as you feel his movements becoming rapid and untethered, knowing that the feeling of your tighetning cunt will soon become too pleasurable for him to bear, it’s with satisfied foreboding that you watch him give you his last, hard thrust. 

There are a least of couple minutes that pass where neither of you move, the only sounds being your successive heavy breathing as you both come down from intense highs. Leehan makes the first move by carrying you your bed, where he plops you down on your back and makes a very sexy whimpering sound as he’s forced to pull out of you. 

Even once you’re separated, he still plops down on the bed to rest next to you. A forearm’s length apart, you long for him to touch you, even if just for a moment.

“Shit,” he mutters, an outburst that has you confused until you notice his eyes and their fixation with your bedside alarm clock. “I didn’t realize how late it is. I really don’t want to drive back to my apartment at this time.”

Then stay, is what you think to yourself, but these are words that you would never dare to actually vocalize. 

There was truthfully one instance just a month or so prior when you suggested he might leave a bookbag in your room so he didn’t have to walk home with it in the rain. Not too soon will you forget the way a usually upbeat Leehan turned cold on you within seconds, neglecting to say more than a see you later as he almost sprinted to leave your apartment.

You’d be lying if you said his eagerness to leave after the sex is finished wasn’t at least the slightest bit dismaying. 

The delusional part of you wishes he could at least pretend like he didn’t just come here to fuck you and nothing more. 

It would be nice to believe that the sheer enjoyment of your company would be enough to make him want to stay afterwards.  

And what’s worse is that every time, he comes up with some way to express how much he probably should stay. Like just now, how he mentioned how late it was. It frustrates you more than anything. 

Because no matter how much he says he doesn’t want to leave, he always does. 

And at this point, you wish he would just do it decisively instead of trying to soften the blow. 

“Did you hear about the party we’re having this weekend?” you hear him ask suddenly, his body in a sitting position as he gets up to put on his clothes. “Ha. We . Well, really Jaehyun.”

Though you find it difficult to have casual conversation with him when your mind is elsewhere, you indulge him with a truthful shake of your head. “No. What’s it for?”

“Halloween. He’s asking everyone to dress up,” says Leehan, having already made it to the other side of your room. If you were in more of a spirited mood, you might laugh at how he mentions dressing up for Halloween as if it’s something that’s beneath him. “Don’t worry that he didn’t tell you. He just came up with the idea yesterday. 

The fact that Jaehyun hadn’t mentioned the party to you wasn’t even a thought that occurred in your mind. You were more so concerned with the logistics of deciding to throw a party during midterms. Stressed beyond relief with your own course load, you couldn’t imagine deciding to attend anything extracurricular at this time of year.

But then, the idea of making such plans seems a lot more plausible when Leehan says, “Are you coming, pretty? I think it would be cute if we went with with matching costumes.”

It’s because of moments like these that your feelings for Leehan can be so conflicting. At the beginning of your day today, he sat around you with your other friends and acted as if you were nothing more than acquaintances. Followed you to your dorm and fucked you as sensually and passionately as a boyfriend would. Is getting dressed and preparing to leave within minutes of reaching his climax. And now, he calls you pet names in a non-sexual context and tells you he wants to wear a couple’s costume with you. Constantly affronted with gestures that are both hot and cold, you can never be too sure whether it’s you that’s delusional or him that’s sending mixed messages.

Nonetheless, you cannot help yourself from replying, “Sounds fun. I’ll be there,” even though you know you that you shouldn’t. Even though you know you have far too much on your plate academically to be going to a party on a school night. Even though you know your actions should not be so predated on his. Knowing all of this, you still find yourself not the least bit concerned, only excited, as you think about attending the party together.

“See you then, gorgeous. Have sweet, x-rated dreams about me,” is what he says as he finishes putting on his discarded clothes, standing in your bedroom doorway as he prepares to leave. His silhouette casts a shadow over your dimly lit room, covering your naked, vulnerable body. 

“Shut up,” you mumble weakly as you move to throw a pillow at him, a part of you wishing that all of your interactions felt as sweet as this one did.  

>you: hey i’m at the halloween store picking out costumes, what were you thinking?

Five minutes before you were planning to head out to Jaehyun’s party, you reread this text from two days ago over and over, the delivered in the corner almost taunting you. Just 13 words took you at least an half an hour to send because you couldn’t stop wondering if it was too vague or too forward or if you shouldn’t have even said anything all. 

And now, as you sit on the cold bench outside of your dorm waiting for your Uber to the party, wearing a cheap angel costume, you realize now what a mistake it was to send that text. 

You suppose the misunderstanding you’ve found yourself in started with your assumption – based on Leehan’s last words to you as he left your dorm just a few days ago – that you’d be shopping together to find matching costumes for Jaehyun’s party. 

But when the party was inching closer and he had yet to reach out, you ventured to a PartyCity on your own. It was then that you sent the text after much internal laboring, ultimatley thinking that maybe he was busy with midterms and would be grateful that you had taken the initiative on both your behalf's to buy the costumes.

Even as you were halfway through the checkout line and still nothing from Leehan, you bought a matching devil costume for him anyway, plastic red horns to match your sparkly halo. Maybe, when he was less busy, he’d eventually reach back out, still interested in going to the party with you and grateful you saved him the trouble of picking out a costume. 

In your mind, there were a billion rational possibilities for why he wasn’t responding that would still ultimately end in your original plans to attend the party and dress together.

It wasn’t until an hour before the party and still no response from Leehan that you were forced to accept you’d be going to this party yourself. A billion questions arose in your mind. Was something wrong, explaining why he had been M.I.A after making plans with you? Had he forgotten about the party entireley? 

Did he just…no longer want to go with you anymore?

As you stood up to enter your approaching Uber, you try to remind yourself that the party was being thrown at Leehan’s apartment – there was no way that he was oblivious to what today was. If he hadn’t responded to your text, it didn’t necessarily have to be for malicious reasons. Maybe he just genuinely forgot, or was one of the many people who went offline during midterm season.

Either way, you were beginning to think that you were worrying too much for no reason. After all, it isn’t the end of the world that you aren’t arriving together in matching costumes.

Or, maybe it’s the couple of shots you took while getting ready finally kicking in and causing your rationality to dissipate.

Arriving at Jaehyun’s apartment, you already knew that knocking on the door would be futile; without entering, you could hear the loud sounds of bass burning through a speaker that you could guess would make any outside noise intelligible. Instead, you took your chances at twisting the doorknob, and sure enough, it was unlocked. It seemed dangerous to you, but you walked in anyway to find a cacophony of purple, green, and orange strobe lights, illuminating the sizeable crowd of people filling the space. 

Decorations of cobwebs and skulls adored almost every surface, and as you walked further inside, you noticed the array of drink bowls spread out against a long table. 

You observe impressively that Jaehyun went as far as hiring a DJ, a guy dressed in a vampire costume who jerks his upper body back and forth to the rhythm of the music. 

It’s almost like a scene in a coming-of-age-film come to life, mountains of young adult bodies bouncing in a hypnotic fervor while drinks in red solo cups are sloshed up and down in the process.

Making your way through the crowd, you spot several of your newfound friends, plus others Jaehyun introduced you to at the lunar eclipse. You wave particularly to Riwoo, Giselle, and Sungho – dressed as an elf, cat, and fireman respectively – but really , who you’re looking for is Leehan. 

In the first five minutes or so of your search, you have no luck in finding him. You do, however, run into Jaehyun, whose sleeveless jean vest with no shirt underneath immediately gives away his costume as Ken from the Barbie movie. You giggle at the realization, taken aback even more when Jaehyun drapes an arm clumsily over your shoulder, bringing you in closer.

“I’m so glad you could make it, Y/N!” he shouts, competing with the loud music, and just barely – you almost want to drag him somewhere quieter, away from the DJ booth, but the longer you look at Jaehyun, taking in his wobbly, red-faced disposition, you realize he must be drunk. Trying to force him into any extended movement in his current condition would be futile.

“Thanks. Hey, have you seen Leehan?” you ask, skipping any pleasantries. You want to get an answer from his as quickly as possible before he becomes incoherent.

To your dismay, he shakes his head no. “He’s not coming. Told me he had a study date he was going to.”

You hope the absence of light outside from the shitty strobes obscures the expression of disappointment that is surely on your face right now, or even better that Jaehyun is too drunk to remember you asking this at all tomorrow morning. 

“You’re not still interested in him, are you?” asks Jaehyun, the smallest glimmer of rationality breaking through his drunken fervor as he seems to be sincere in asking. You force a smile, wanting to get away from him as quickly as possible before he’s able to notice the difference.

“No, of course not,” you dismiss with a small laugh. You give Jaehyun a friendly pat on the arm before identifying where the drinks are so you can head there next. “Thanks for having me.”

Beelining for the punch table, you fill a red solo cup with a mixture of liquids from all three bowls and throw it down without investigating what you’ve just ingested. To your dismay, rather than dulling your emotions, the alcohol brings out your festering resentment. Towards Leehan, towards this entire situation.

Truthfully, with your own midterms looming and a mountain of late assignments you’ve allowed to pile up over the last few months as you prirotized sex with Leehan, it was against your every best interest to show up tonight. 

You had checked your assignment-board this morning to discover that two essays worth 40% of your grade were due at 11:59 tonight. 

A class you were already failing with a 60 was requiring you to submit revisions for a paper tonight, too.

And yet, you made the decision to come out tonight – promising yourself you’d make it home at a decent enough hour so that you could at least submit something – because of Leehan. 

You were encouraged to wake up this morning and the morning before this morning because of your excitement at the notion of coming to this party with him by your side, wearing matching costumes and sharing drinks and hopefully spit by the end of the night, too.

If you were being completely honest, all of your days were beginning to feel like that — like the only thing you had to continuously look forward to was seeing or experiencing Leehan in some way shape or form.

Experiencing his laugh and his weird habit of bringing up the most random topics at the drop of a dime. Seeing his dimples pop out when he smiles at you and feeling like it’s the cutest thing in the world.

It’s becoming clear to you now that his absence has just as big — no, a bigger emotional impact that his presence does.

You’re angry because you know you didn’t create this excitement out of nowhere: he told you he wanted you to come to this party. You went solely because he said he was going to. If he didn’t want to come tonight, if he had plans, he could have warned you.

You’re angry at yourself for believing him. 

Worst of all, you’re angry because he’s on a date and it confirms all of your biggest insecurities about you not being enough for him.

And it’s at this point that you acknowledge how woefully unequipped you were to say yes to the proposition he gave you the night of the lunar eclipse. Because if it means having to experience the profoundly soul-crushing reality of his disinterest in anything having to do with you other than quick, indulgent sex, you’d rather die a million times. 

You feel your phone buzzing and reach into your bag to grab it unfeelingly. It’s a notification from Leehan. And as if you needed one more reason to feel like shit tonight, the nofication reads, Leehan questioned your message: hey i’m at the halloween store picking out costumes, what were you thinking?

You’re so tired of trying to analyze Leehan’s every action and gesture in an effort to convince yourself that maybe there’s some large reasoning behind his indifference. Instead of searching for any additional explanation behind in the question mark, you simply decide that he’s an asshole who had no intention of going out with you tonight.

And it’s with that steely acknowledgement that suddenly, you feel like you’re about to throw up all of the liquor you’ve just consumed. Taking a deep breath to stop yourself from spilling your guts right then and there, you decide it’s time to go home.

In your haste to leave the party, you don’t bother to try and yell excuse me to the 20 or so people blocking your way to the exit. You simply squeeze past who you can and push past who you can’t, not even caring to look back at those you shoulder check until you’re turned around by a pull against your forearm.

Face-to-chest with a figure you don’t immediately recognize, you body seizes up in fear, a condition that’s only slightly alleviated when you recognize the person’s voice as they exclaim in a deep voice, “ Whoa, whoa whoa . Hey, Y/N.” 

It’s in slight annoyance that you look up to meet Leehan’s gaze, finding him staring down at you softly. It appears that he’s just walked into the party. In a space  full of people dressed as mythical creatures, he looks out of place in his leather jacket and jeans, but also oh so attractive. His hair gathers in front of his face messily, the dark brown locks in a rare state of curliness. He doesn’t have to wear plastic horns to look devilish. 

“Are you okay?” you hear him ask loudly over the sound of the music, his hand now resting on the apex of your arm. Feeling both defiant and embarrassed to tell him the true answer to his question – that no , you’re not okay because you foolishly thought you could count on him to be there for you when he said he would – you don’t answer. 

And in a move that only contributes to the growing feeling that all Leehan truly cares about when it comes to you is sex, he doesn’t even allow you the time to answer, even if you wanted to. “You look pretty, angel ,” he says only seconds after his last remark, using both of his hands to smoothe down pieces of your hair messed up by your headband. 

A compliment that would usually cause sparks to fly throughout your stomach now only annoys you, especially as you catch a whiff of fruity, feminine perfume on his body. 

“You smell like someone else,” you tell him plainly, too drunk to hide what it is you’re thinking. And you can see that the remark and the resentful tone in which you say it takes him aback, even as he chuckles in an attempt to remain composed. 

“Because I was driving for Uber, tonight, pretty,” he says, and before you have a chance to question his excuse, he continues by asking, “How much have you had to drink?”

“Why does that matter?” you retort with a scoff, convinced he’s about to try and spin this on you by suggesting your valid anger is a result of your drinking. 

But then he puts on that signature smirk of his, those wretched dimples of his coming out as he leans down into your ear to say, “Because when I ask If I can take you to my room in about five minutes, I want to make sure I’m not taking advantage of you.”

Yout hate that those words and the implication of sex have you immediately aroused and pliant, even as you grapple with the feeling of being just a physical object to him. 

Because as much as you dislike him right now for what he’s put you through emotionally, his renewed attention feels like the perfect solvent to your wounds.

“You wouldn’t be,” you reply softly, your voice coming out small and weak as you maintain unbroken eye contact with him.

“Yeah?” he replies almost mockingly, bringing a hand up to stroke your cheek. “Why do I get the feeling that you want me to take advantage of you?”

It feels like your mind and heart are on two different accords as your face remains passive and unaffected yet what comes out of your mouth is, “Take me to your room and find out.”

It’s less a feeling of shame but more like acceptance that comes over you as you follow Leehan back into the throes of the party, his hand leading you through the crowd of people and towards his bedroom. 

Deep down, you know that the excuse he gave you earlier about his whereabouts was bullshit. Never once before has Leehan mentioned driving for Uber, and even if he did, it still wouldn’t justify his complete lack of regard for the plans you made and his lack of regard for you , refusing to notify you in advance that he wouldn’t be available.

But when faced with the proposition of sex, it seems foolish to deny it so that you can… what ? Continue to stew in feelings that will just leave you feeling empty, hurt, and worthless? Question him about being on a date when you know you have no right to?

Having sex will at least guarantee you a few moments of mind-numbing bliss, even if only a temporary high. Better that than have to face the reality of your own complicated nest of delusion.

As you’re let into Leehan’s room, hearing the sound of him closing the door shut behind you, you’re hit with the sudden realization that in the three months or so you’ve known him, you’ve never been in here before. 

His room has all the markers of a college boy’s sense of taste – dark colored furniture and bedsheets, posters scattered on the wall with no real order, random piles of mess occupying corners of the room. 

In a space that is otherwise unremarkable, your attention is piqued by a square, rectangular tank on top of his dresser.

“You have fish ,” you remark in a tone that is both matter-a-fact and questioning, something about your drunken state making you more curious than ever about the tank and it’s inhabitants. 

Throwing his jacket onto a random chair, Leehan comes up next to you and lets out a chuckle as he takes in your awe-stricken expression. “For some reason, I forgot you haven’t been in here before,” he observes, and when he watches you just continue to stand still, eyes transfixed on the fish but still remaining a few feet away from the tank, he gestures for you to follow him to it. “C’mon. Sit.”

You can’t help the way that your limbs move eagerly and excitedly towards the tank, where Leehan pulls up two extra chairs for you both to sit and view it together. 

Fish of all different sizes and shapes swim around in vibrant blurs of pink, orange and beige. You watch it all in awe, not sure if it’s because you’re tipsy or simply curious, and as Leehan explains what each type of fish is called, you hang onto every word.

“...this one is called a corydoras catfish. The rest of them are shrimp,” he explains, pressing his finger up against the tank as he points out each fish and the attributes that differentiate them from one another. 

In one corner of the tank, a group of fish swim frantically around each other, as if fighting.

“Usually they come right up against the tank when I sit in front of them like this. I think they’re mad because I haven’t given them any fish food.”

“Don’t you need to feed them?” you ask in genuine concern, turning to look at Leehan who only smirks.

“Are you trying to imply that I’m a negligent father, Y/N?” he retorts dramatically, his body tensing in mock offense before he relaxes and explains, “Don’t worry. They’re supposed to eat the algae on the rock. For some reason, they’re just being hesitant.”

“Maybe the algae isn’t what they want,” you chime in with a reasoning tilt to your quiet, contemplative voice.

“Just because the fish food is what they want doesn’t mean I should give it to them,” Leehan retorts simply, and maybe it’s the drunk, cynical part of you that thinks he’s making reference to your relationship. That you’re the fish who just can’t help but want something it can’t have, and he’s the sensible overseer that remains in control of what you will receive. 

But if Leehan is making some sort of larger, metaphorical reference to your relationship, he surely moves on from it quickly, becoming wistful and contemplative as he says, “I’ve been raising fishes all my life. Sometimes when I’m stressed I’ll just sit in front of the tank and talk to them.”

He presses his hand flat against the tank, his lips twitching into a prideful, paternal smile. “Because I know that unlike humans, they’ll never judge me.”

You find that your eyes never stray from the side of Leehan’s face as he talks, feeling almost like you’re a purveyor to this private, intimate moment he’s having. It feels like a privilege to be able to observe Leehan in moments like this where you’re given a genuine glimpse into his inner personhood.

But you’re pushed out just as quickly as you’re let in, watching as he promptly gets up from his seat by the tank and makes his way over to the bed. You turn your body in your chair to face him, and find that he’s now staring at you lustfully, gesturing for you to join him.

And as dismaying as it is to see him abandon the brief moment of emotional vulnerability just as quickly as it began, you stand up anyway, making your way to him.

Your movements toward him are slow, shy almost, and you can tell it pleases Leehan as you stand between his legs and are brought forward by his hands pushing at your lower back. He looks up at you, communicating wordlessly with just his sensual gaze how much he wants you. Your lingering anger from before stops you from making the first move, but even so, you don’t resist when he leans in to press a soft, steady kiss against your lips. Finding something almost apologetic about the innocent gesture, you put aside all of your inhibitions and decide to deepen the kiss, leaning your body fully into his and relishing in the groans he makes against your mouth. 

Passion quickly bleeds into the both of your movements until you’re kissing in a crazed, frantic manner. His hands that previously only looped your hips now wander across the expanse of your back, and with one forceful tug, your zipper comes down your dress. You’ve only just allowed the fabric to slide down your shoulders before he’s pulling the dress down himself, exposing your nipples to the cold air before covering them with his hot mouth. Tongue swirling around your hardened nubs, you nuzzle a hand in his hair and throw your head back in contentment. 

It’s with a wet pop that he pulls off of you, leaning upward to lock your lips once more. But because you're both incredibly and overwhelming horny, the kiss lasts for barely a few seconds before he’s pulling away to voice his plans for your body. 

“Want you to sit on my face,” he mumbles, voice gruff and deep and dripping with desire. “Wanna put that pretty pussy of yours in my mouth.”

Smirking in reply, you rest your head against his, eyes closed as you weather the currents of several shocks of arousal that travel up your body and make your legs feel like jelly. “I want that, too,” you confess, your voice sounding wispy as your body loses the strength to be assertive. “Also kinda want your dick in my mouth.”

His eyes light up at this, and with a hand on your chin that brings your face level with his, he says, “How about this: You hop on my face, and I’ll let you suck my cock. Sound good?”

Something about Leehan’s enduring leadership has the effect of making you feel intimidated, so much so that all you manage is a shy nod in response to his words, which he luckily accepts without any further prompting. You’re better at speaking with your actions, anyway, knowing that there’s a wordless understanding in the way that you kiss him hard and passionately while your hands push him onto his back.  

It’s with greedy, fast-moving hands that you strip him of his clothes, desperate for the instant bliss that is his mouth against your clit, the instant satisfaction that is his cum shooting down your throat. Once you have him fully naked, the fuzzy halo headband you’ve long forgotten about the only shared item of clothing between the two of you, you begin to adjust so that you may assume the required position. 

But your movements are suddenly halted when Leehan sits up suddenly, muttering the word “Wait,” as he maneuvers the both of your bodies so that you now lay on the complete opposite side of the bed. 

“That’s better,” he mumbles contentedly.

“What?”

“Just don’t want the fish to see what I’m about to do to you,” he replies, an answer so baffling that all you can do is laugh in reply. Your reaction barely phases him as he moves to drag your body onto his, and just like that, his kookiness is forgotten and your focus becomes tethered to the feeling of his breath against your awaiting pussy. 

He blows a few teasing, cool breaths against your dripping core, and before he has the chance to make you succumb to the pleasure of his mouth, you reach out to begin your own enjoyment of his heavy, hard cock. 

His member is veiny and substantial in your hands, reddened tip dripping with beads of precum that you lick away without thought of how it will impact Leehan. You feel his body seize with a jolt of pleasure from the direct contact with his most sensitive body part. 

And as if trying to get payback, he begins his assault on your pussy by sucking your clit into his warm, wet mouth.

From there, it becomes a competition of wills, a battle to see who can be least distracted by the pleasure they’re receiving in order to make the other fold, or at the very least, reach their climax. 

It’s a war you feel yourself pitifully losing as your drunken fervor somehow makes every casually overwhelming sensation feel 10x more heightened. You feel yourself inching closer and closer to release with each blissful flick of his tongue against your clit. 

Still, not forgetting about Leehan and his pleasure, you fight through the mental haze of your own gratification and concentrate on making slow, purposeful pumps of his cock within the ring of your hand. 

Sucking Leehan off is an activity you’ve gotten more than enough experience in to know what it takes to make him come. You gather all of the moisture in your mouth and wet his shaft with your spit. You press teasing, chaste kisses on his sensitive tip. You swirl your tongue in circles and continue stroking him with your hand. 

And then, when you can feel his thighs tensing as he grows tired of your teasing, you offer him relief in the form of taking him fully in your warm mouth.

Leehan’s self control is impeccable, even as you’re bobbing your head up and down his cock. He drags his tongue through your folds and finds himself at your hole, licking up the arousal there and fucking you open with his tongue. The only sign he shows of his own impending release are in the groans that he lets out against your mound. You can feel something overwhelming begining to build in your stomach, and though your body tries to squirm away from it, he holds you against his face.

You pitifully moan with his cock fully lodged in your mouth, and with a few final thrusts of his tongue, the knot in your stomach comes undone. As your orgasm overwhelms you, it’s difficult to continue moving your head. 

But Leehan’s too close to let his climax slip away from him, so it’s in desperation that he begins bucking his hips into your mouth at the same time he’s licking you through your orgasm. You just relax your jaw and let out restrained whimpers as Leehan fucks your mouth, not stopping until he finishes with a groan.

“My god, Y/N,” Leehan mutters breathily, turning you both on your sides, unraveling his limbs from yours until you’re no longer skin to skin. “We should do that position more often.”

You nod lazily in agreement, and with the little strength left in your limbs, you sit up to meet Leehan in the middle of the bed for a wet kiss. 

The position is slightly awkward, the two of you laying in opposite directions, twisting your bodies unnaturally, but kissing each other is a habit so addictive that even as you’re pulling away, he pulls at your hair to bring you back in for just a few seconds longer.

It’s comforting to fall back down onto the bed and feel Leehan’s fingers gently caressing the skin of your ankle. In your sleepy, post-orgasm haze, you’re filled with a sudden surge of contement in regards to your decision to come here tonight. 

You feel the fabric of a blanket kissing the sides of your body, and when you look over to find Leehan getting comfy in bed, it’s with satisfaction that you begin to do the same.

But then, the blanket you were just about to pull onto your body is snatched off of your skin, and when you look over at Leehan, you see him tucking himself in with a sleepy, content smile on his face. It’s just as you’re sitting up that he flutters his eyes closed, and with a sleepy tilt to his voice he says, “Hey, if you see Jaehyun on your way out, can you ask him to call me? I wanna know what time he plans on ending this.”

There’s a second after those words hit your ears where you’re not sure if you misheard him, slow to move from where you are in his bed. But as the implications of the statement hit you horrifically and all at once, it’s with a heavy feeling of shame weighing down your body that you reply, “Sure,” going to gather your discarded things from the floor.

The humiliating act of putting on your clothes after being dismissed so casually is almost instantaneously sobering. You catch a view of yourself in the display of your phone and notice that your plastic halo headband has been bent 90 degrees, likely from how rough you were. Your hair is strewn in every direction. Your mascara is smeared and ruined, running down your cheeks in squiggly, broken lines. 

You’re a mess. He made you a mess for the sake of his pleasure. And instead of cleaning you up, Leehan has essentially just kicked you out onto the street.

Only Leehan could cause such a dramatic shift between feeling like you were safe and desired to feeling like you’re just a worthless speck of nothing attached to the bottom of his shoe.

It’s just as you’re about to open the door to leave that you hear him call your name, and with your back turned to him, a hopeful part of you thinks that maybe, just maybe, he’ll say he changed his mind and wants you to stay.

But instead, as if to turn the knife in more, when you turn around, you find him staring boredly at his phone. 

Instead of regret on his face, you see neutrality. 

And instead of asking you to stay, he just says, “Thanks so much by the way. For the sex and the favor.”

It’s with a forced, robotic sense of calmness that you’re replying. “No problem, Leehan.”

And then you leave his room, never feeling so profoundly insignificant than you do in this moment.

There’s nothing quite worse than waking up with a terrible hangover, a panging feeling of emotional emptiness, and then having to send a string of desperate emails to your professors asking for deadline extensions. But that’s exactly what you do in the aftermath of the Halloween party, and by the grace of all things holy, you’re granted an extra few days to get your assignments in.

So grateful for the chance to resuscitate your failing GPA, you focus your efforts on finishing your assignments and almost forget about the cause of such misfortune, until you’re reminded when your phone suddenly buzzes with a text.

>leehan: what are you doing?

Messages of this sort usually have the effect of leaving you excited and giddy in anticipation of Leehan’s inevitable arrival to your doorstep. But now, all you feel is annoyance as you read the text and plague yourself over what to say. 

You type and delete several versions of a response that ultimately boils down to i’m too busy trying not to fail all of my classes which i wouldn’t be failing if it weren’t for all of the time i spend either thinking about you or fucking you , but in the end, you resolutely decide not to respond at all. 

In fact, in a move surely colored by the resentment you’ve allowed to grow for far too long now, you turn on read receipts so he knows you chose to disregard him on purpose.

You then continue typing away at one of the three essays that are past due, hoping you can forget about Leehan and return to the focus you had before receiving the message and being reminded of the past week’s events. You’re pleased when you look up after a few moments to see that an hour has passed and your attention hasn’t lingered. 

Just as you open a new tab to begin the reading for your second essay, the indistinguishable sound of a knock at your door stirs your attention otherwise.

You look around your shared dorm space. Your roommate went home for break already and hasn’t been here for the past few days. Assuming she communicated that to her friends, you know whoever’s on the other side of the door shouldn’t be for her. 

It could be an RA, though you couldn’t imagine why. 

Deciding to confront your curiosity head on, you get up to open the door and feel your eyes widen when it’s Leehan leaning against the doorframe.

Dressed comfortably in a hoodie and cargo pants, he looks up to greet you, smirking at the sight of your looming silhouette. “Hello,” he says casually, as if his sudden appearance was known to you before now.

There’s a strange mixture of excitement and dread that swirls inside of you the moment you see him. Because on one hand, just a look from him is something that gives you uncontrollable butterflies. You truly do like being around Leehan. But you feel like you have no control over the fact that you will let him in, even though you have every reason not to. 

He’ll fuck you, give you some of the best pleasure of your life, and will leave right afterwards, making you feel shitty. 

You’ll exerience the greatest high followed by the greatest low. 

And already in anticipation of how terrible you’ll feel in the aftermath of this inevitable scenario, it’s as if you’re body is already making space for the knife that will surely tear through your heart when this ends.

“What are you doing here?” you ask, though you already have a strong feeling what the answer will be. 

He’ll play coy, changing the subject by asking another question in response to your question.

“Aren’t you gonna let me in?” he says next, even though you both know the true reason why he’s come.

And because you like to feel like you have even the smallest semblance of control over the situation, you don’t give in to him easily, making a face of mock contemplation before replying, “Not if you don’t answer the question first.”

“Did you know that peppermint dwarf angelfish require a very specific type of fish food?” he asks, and because you’re so used to these divertive, weird diatribes he’s always so inclined to go on, all you can do is try and follow along. “I had to come all the way up here to find the only shop in Korea that sells it. And while I was already up here, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to stop by your dorm and say hi.”

You tilt your head as you stare at him, considering bitterly whether he could be telling the truth or not. 

But of course, his serious expression quickly melts into a smirk as he explains himself. “I’m kidding, Y/N. Not about the fishes, but about why I’m here. I wanted to see you, so I came.”

There’s something that’s really disgustingly cocky and self-centered about him just showing up to your door without warning with the unsaid though obvious expectation of sex. 

And yet, would he be wrong to have that expectation, when so many times before you’ve let him for that exact purpose?

He must be able to see the conflicting thoughts you’re having reflected on your expression, because from behind his back, he reveals a bouquet of flowers. You don’t know how you didn’t notice he was holding them until now, a colorful array of peonies and roses with, upon further inspection, a bunch of cardboard fishes placed among the petals. 

You can’t help but smile as you take them from him.

“I brought flowers?” he says, his voice titled in an expression of this being an olive branch, his way of expressing apology, though for what you don’t know. For showing up here unannounced? For putting you through so much obvious emotional turmoil? You’re not sure. 

There is something at least a little romantic about him boldly showing up at your doorstep instead of waiting for you to respond to his text. Though, through another, more cynical lens, you could also call it kind of creepy. Should you go with the latter interpretation, you know you would be sending the worse kind of message by letting him in anyway. You’d essentially be confirming to him that this relationship is on his terms, that he can show up to your place whenever he wants to get his dick wet, regardless of if you’re busy like you are now.

But isn’t that what this has always been between the two of you? Once again, you feel helpless in the face of the unbounding energy his presence causes. You can only watch the rest of the nights events play out like a bad movie you’ve seen far too many times, like you’re a witness from outside your own body and life.

You walk away from Leehan, leaving your door open so he knows he can come in. You place the flowers neatly on the table next to the entrance. It’s when you face the kitchenette of your dorm that you realize just how cluttered the place is; too stressed about your schoolwork, you haven’t put any thought into keeping it clean.

“Sorry,” you mutter sheepishly under your breath as you hear Leehan come in and close the door behind him. “It’s kind of a mess in here.”

He chuckles, as if to agree without having to say it plainly and hurt your feelings. You turn to face him and find that he’s already looking at you, a penetrating expression on his face as he asks, “Are you okay?”

You’ve never found that question as hard to answer as it is right now, especially when it’s his voice doing the questioning. 

Should you say that you’re on the verge of failing all of your classes, a circumstance you’ve never once had to worry about until he came into your life, causing a whirwhild of uncontainable emotions to take over your life? 

That you’ve been questioning everything when it comes to your own self-esteem and worthiness because it feels like you’re nothing if you’re not validated by the fleeting yet addicting warmth of his gaze and attention?

In the time that it takes you to think, you realize that Leehan has come closer, his body in front of you so that now you can’t escape from the kitchen counter against your back that blocks you in completely. Dazed by the proximity of him, you forget what you were asked, and are grateful when he doesn’t press you for an answer. It’s better for both of you if you don’t respond, anyway, because your honesty would surely kill the mood.

“You know what might make you feel better?” he asks, and you fight back a cynical giggle at the fact that he doesn’t even have to hear you say it to know that you need to be made better. “Fucking the shit out of me.”

As always, his moments of sudden candor simultaneously make you laugh and cringe because of how ill-fitting they are to the persona he occupies in your mind. You’ve always liked how awkward and strange Leehan is, which is why his fuckboy tendencies have always landed uneasily for you. 

It becomes too easy, then, to tease him by pretending you didn’t hear his outward expression of desire. “I don’t like the way you look at people,” you say, trying your hand at his usual divertive tactics. “It’s like you can see through them.”

You can always appreciate how even when you sidestep his advances, Leehan always plays into your banter, never pressuring you into action. “It’s because I can. BOO!” he exclaims, mouth open in an o shape as he childishly expresses fright. You muster a laugh at his playfulness.

After that, you’re both silent, and you know it’s because you’re both tired of playing games. You’re at the point now where it becomes obvious in both of your piercing gazes that you want to fuck, and now it’s just about who will make the move first. 

Suddenly conscious of Leehan’s long hair and how it hangs over the sides of his face, you reach your arms up to take pieces of it into your hands. There’s a rubber band on your wrist that you use to try and put it in a ponytail so you can see his features better, but before you can finish, he takes the opportunity of your increased closness to kiss you. 

The intensity of his kiss knocks the air out of your lungs, and you let go of his hair before you can finish tying it up. Because of your close proximity, it falls over the sides of your own face, obscuring the rest of the world from you so that it’s just him in your vision. 

His hands rest on the apex of your hips, and he pushes you slightly so that you’re completely backed up against the kitchen counter. You’d thought you’d feel more urgent, but your movements are leisurely as you bring your hands to his hoodie and begin to pull at the buttons holding it together. As the fabric begins to sag off his arms, he starts kissing at your neck, and you tilt your head to the side to accommodate him.

Once his shirt has fallen to the ground, you then work to release his cock from the confines of his pants, pushing at the thankfully loose waistband until it springs out against his naked stomach. You jerk him slowly and leisurely but it causes him to groan into your mouth just the same, and soon he’s moving to unbutton your own t-shirt until you’re both naked from the waist up.

“Leehan,” you whimper, as he cups your tits with both hands, “Bed.”

“Which one? I take it your roommate’s is empty?” he replies jokingly, and when you stare at him scathingly, he chuckles. “I’m kidding. Don’t look at me like that or I’ll come in my pants.”

You have no chance to scold Leehan for his teasing any further before he’s picking you up off the ground, your legs wrapping around his waist and hands around his neck as he walks habitually to your bedroom. He’s still on top of you even as you feel yourself being lowered onto your bed, mouth on yours in a sloppy kiss while his hands rush to get your pants off. He sits up to kick his own off, and now the two of you are left completely naked. 

This would usually be the point where the two of you would become like animals and rush to fuck as soon as possible. But while standing above your body, you watch as Leehan just stares at your still figure on the bed, taking in every detail with his penetrative, admiring eyes.

“I find you so beautiful,” he softly confesses, caressing the skin on your hip before looking up to meet your shy gaze. “Do you know that?”

It’s unclear whether he’s asking if you know that you’re beautiful, or if you know that he finds you beautiful. Either way, it’s in a moment of sincere honesty that you reply, “Only sometimes.”

Because there are days when you look in the mirror or put on your clothes on your way to campus and feel like your body is less of a home, but a prison that you’re forever doomed to occupy.

And with the emotional rollercoaster that is having sex with Leehan only for him to completely ignore you afterward, you’ve naturally found yourself wondering if the only alluring thing about you is that you’ll let him fuck you with no questions asked. That in a school full of beautiful girls with actual self-esteem, he’s settled for you so long as you continue to provide him with pussy.

Leehan furrows his eyebrows at your response, and with a corrective tone of voice replies, “ Always .” In movements that are slow and gentle, he leans down to lay a chaste kiss on your forehead. Another on the top of your cheek. Another on your ear. And then on every single part of your face that you’d normally consider insignificant. And then slowly down your rising and falling torso. 

“Everything about you. I couldn’t pick a favorite thing because I love every single part of you,” he confesses in a whisper-like tone against your skin. Finally reaching your pussy, he places one last gentle kiss at the top of your mound, something about the gesture making your pussy clench, espeically as he says, “You’re my favorite girl.”

To be affirmed by Leehan in this way is something that causes both your heart to swell and your body to pulse with arousal. But it’s also with a surge of sadness that you wish these words didn’t affect you so monumentally. 

A part of you wants him to stop making remarks of this sort to you during sex because you can never be sure that he truly means them.

But if that’s the case, then why do they feel and sound so genuine?

It’s with shaky resoluteness in your voice that you sit up to look at Leehan, replying, “Then show me.”

And, as if spurred on by the challenge, you can see Leehan’s expression changing even with half of his face obscured by your pussy. “How?” he asks, leaning in to lick teasingly against your clit. “Like this?” 

When he doesn’t wait for your answer and continues sucking and licking against your clit, you throw your head back as you enjoy the physical manifestations of Leehan’s attraction to you. 

If there is any time when you feel most desired and liked by him, it’s when he’s in between your legs, devouring you whole like a man starved. 

He uses his mouth not to tell you sweet-nothings, but to give you some of the best pleasure of your life. And it’s in gestures like these where you can wordlessly understand his devotion to you. 

It’s in your desperation to reach your peak that you begin to buck your hips into his mouth, wanting more of him, but he stops it with both hands that snake up your body and press down on your boobs. He tweaks at your nipples in a way that makes your back arch, but in a gesture that surprises you, he also just rests his hand over your chest, right where your heart is. You wonder if he can feel the fluctuations of your pulse, how it speeds up when his tongue does. Dreamily, the thought of him being so in sync with you that he can feel the intimate beatings of your inner organ sends you into a spiral of heightened satisfaction.

“Leehan, I’m gonna come.”

Even with your eyes closed, you can almost hear the smirk in his voice as he says, “My favorite four words in the world. Go ahead, baby. I’ve got you.”

Somehow, you think your body needed that permission, because it’s only moments later that your orgasm takes over your body. 

Your eyelids are covered with dancing spirals, your spine bends as you arch up into the air, and your body vibrates with a feeling so pleasurable it’s like an addiction, something you’d endure the greatest emotional lows to receive on a regular basis.

As you still, Leehan gets up to sit on his knees, looking over at your bedside dresser. “Still have the condoms where I left them?”

“Top drawer,” you confirm.

“Good girl,” he praises with a smile, reaching over you to rummage through the drawer and coming out of it with a silver packet between his fingers. 

It’s just as he’s finished putting it on and is about to slide in that you raise a hand to stop him, saying, “Leehan wait. I wanna ride you.”

His eyebrows raise at this, but he nonetheless maneuvers so that he’s in a criss-cross position, saying with a grin, “Woah. I feel lucky. You never get on top. Make me do all the work.”

“Shut up,” you grumble, making your way over to him and holding onto his shoulders as you hover over his hardened cock. But before you can take him, he roughly grabs your chin, squeezing your face in his hold in a way that forces your eyes on his.

“Make me,” he asserts, staring at you so intensely that it makes your stomach swoop. Reaching between your bodies, you grab hold of his pulsing erection and line it up with your hole, sinking down on him and loving the way it makes both of your mouths instantly open on impact.

It feels like you’re being split open in the most pleasurable way as you sit down fully on Leehan’s cock and allow the satisfcation of being filled by him to consume you. Driven by the pursuit of your own pleasure, you bounce, swivel, and thrust yourself against him. And when Leehan throws his head back, beautiful neck on display as he growls, “You’re so tight, Y/N,” you’re motivated to go even harder.

Sex with Leehan has never felt more intimate than it does now, when you’re above him and able to catch every small distortion in his gorgeous expression as he gets taken away by the gratification of this sex. Mantaining eye contact with him is nothing new to you now, but even so, you find yourself feeling like his eyes are admiring your soul more than they are your body or face as you bounce up and down for his viewing pleasure.

With your arms wrapped around his neck, you’re skin to skin, heart to heart, and in a way you almost feel like the closeness grants you the telepathic ability to know what he’s feeling and thinking. If there were to be a physical manifestation of the word yearning , it would be this exact moment between the two of you. 

Your expression melts into a smirk as you continue to ride him, and you feel almost motivated to giggle as the pleasure you’re experiencing makes you feel deliriously satisfied and happy. Leehan, with his hands leisurely rested at his sides, scans your face as if trying to memorize every detail, saying, “You make the prettiest expressions when my dick is inside of you. I truly can’t – nphhh – get enough.”

It’s as you begin to set a pace that has the tip of his cock kissing your g-spot with every bounce that you yearn for him to touch you, to light your skin on fire with the warmth of his touch. Anywhere. Everywhere. “Leehan, touch me .”

And it’s because he’s come to know your body so well, know exactly what makes you tick and what places to touch that have you crying in pleasure, he brings his hand to your clit and starts rubbing incoherent shapes into your swelling bud. Your body feels like it’s on fire, so much so that you begin to lose strength in your trembling thighs, something Leehan picks up on as he says almost desperately, “Faster, Y/N. Take it.”

You have to fight through the strain in your legs and the building tension in your stomach in order to begin bouncing on Leehan so hard it’s as if your life depends on it. And though it feels like it’s taking all of the energy in your body, you do it because you want to make him feel good. 

You do it because you want him to continue thinking of you as his favorite girl, even though that statement in itself implies the existence of other girls. 

Even though it feels like every morsel of your self-esteem is shattered in the process, you do it because his attention means so much to you that it blurs everything else.

“ Fuck , I’m gonna come,” you cry out as the pleasure becomes too much, as it begins to feels like everything else in your vision is obscured except for Leehan.

“Open your mouth,” you hear him say, and although your sex-crazed mind can barely comprehend why he’s asking you that, you comply anyways and feel your arousal growing stronger when, to your surpise, he tips your head back with a hand on your jaw and spits into your mouth.

The gesture is dirty and lewd and yet a moan rips out of you just the same, and the closer that your orgasm inches, the less you feel like you’re in control of your body or your reactions. Every thought and will in your brain has been diluted so that your only objective is to reach your peak.

“You like that, pretty?” he asks teasingly, his own orgasm approaching in a way that causes his voice to come out strained and tight. “Let me see what a dirty girl you are. Come all over my cock.”

Whimpers of his name leave your mouth in broken succession, the robustness of your orgasm milking you until your body quite literally collapses against his. And it’s after giving everything that your body could give, your legs trembling and your body screaming out in exhaustion, that Leehan takes over by thrusting wildly up into you. In search of his own climax, you can only whimper weakly into the skin of his neck and allow him to manhandle your limp body up and down his cock.

“I know, I know,” he coos apolgetically in your ear, fucking up into you hard and firmly. “I”m close. Gonna come inside your pretty little pussy.”

With a last thrust so impactful that it resonates throughout your entire body, Leehan releases into his condom, twisting his hips inside of you before pulling out with a groan. You collapse onto the bed together, and even though you can barely feel anything in the bottom half of your body, even though you have the foreboding inclination that it’ll be hard to walk later, you still can’t help the foolish smile that appears automatically on your face. There is no greater high than basking in your post-orgasm haze.

The stillness of the moments you share after sex is something you cling onto every time, wishing that the universe would mercifully turn those seconds of blissful and intimate silence between the two of you into minutes. But like the distant sound of thunder that lets you know that it’s going to rain, you feel the bed dip with the weight of Leehan sitting up, knowing that it’s only a matter of time before he sees himself out.

“You made a mess,” you hear him say as he picks at the fabric of your sheets where, sure enough, the white sheets have been soiled grey. The comment gives you slight butterflies, and as you manage a weak smile, about to reply with something snarky, he says, “Want me to stay behind? Do your laundry?”

If only for a few seconds, you allow yourself to consider the possibility that he’s being serious. That for the first time since you met him, he’s actually going to stay behind and take care of you instead of leaving you wet and limp and naked and sad. You hate how good those few seconds of belief feel. That just the idea of how doing something as simple as your laundry could make you feel so fulfilled and wanted.

At first you’re not sure what to think when he leans down to gently caress the hair on top of your head. But then, with an almost pitying expression on his face, he replies, “I’m just joking. If I hang around for too long, how would you miss me?”

There have been lots of times when Leehan has shown his lack of regard for you in his actions, but never in his words.

So to hear him plainly confirm to you that this is all a game to him, that it’s always been his intention to leave you strung out and wanting more, that he knows the emotional impact his absence causes, hits you like a slap in the face.

He doesn’t have to hide how little he cares about you because he knows that no matter how he treats you, you’ll always come back.

Haven’t you proven that exact notion to him time and time again?

“See you later, Y/N,” he says as he’s leaving your bedroom, a statement that he can make with confidence because you’ve shown him time and time again that he can walk all over you and still be guaranteed access to your body, mind and soul.

And as the reality of the situation that you’ve found yourself in hits you all at once, it’s at the sound of your front door closing that you begin to cry on impact.

Tears that feel endless begin to pour out onto your cheeks until you’re open-mouthed sobbing, and because you’ve spent so long holding these emotions back, they wreck your body until you have no energy left and devolve into soundless heaves.

You fall asleep like this, so emotionally wrecked and confused that you forgot about the three essays you were supposed to submit. 

You’re on the verge of tears as you enter your advisor’s office, sitting down across from the older woman whose passive expression tells you everything you need to know about the sort of news she’s about to deliver to you. But it’s with surprising clarity that you react to her saying, “Y/N, you’ve failed almost every single one of your classes this term.”

You stare blankly at her, processing the emotions that come over you at this news. It’s suprsing to say that the immediate feeling that comes over you is relief, but you owe it to the fact that you’ve been struggling this entire semester, plagued with anxiety as to whether or not you’d fail. And so, to have it finally confirmed after months of stressing about it feels similarly to being in the eye of a storm. 

After struggling for so long, you’re at a vantage point where it feels more comforting to be able to say that all that’s left is for you to fight your way out of the storm entirely. 

“Typically, when students have such large and sudden drops in performance like this, it’s because of some significant life event,” she explains, tilting her head as she looks at you pitifully. “Given that you’re a transfer student, I’m wondering if the transition from your old school to this one had an impact on your performance. Are you finding the academic rigor here harder?”

“No, maam,” you say, shaking your head. Academically, this school has been everything you had been hoping for and more since deciding to transfer. You couldn’t have expected to meet someone who so greatly turned your life around within a matter of months. 

Not sure how to explain the unique set of circumstances leading up to this moment, you vaguely answer, “I’ve just…transparently had a lot going on this semester in my personal life. So I haven’t been as great at prioritizing my classes.”

Humming in understanding, your advisor moves to face her computer. “Well, I’m afraid the next steps are to put you on academic probation for the rest of this semester. Are you aware of what that all entails?”

You shake your head no. Your advisor goes on to explain it to you. “You’ll need to maintain at least a 2.5 grade point average moving forward. Additionally, you’ll be given a tutor – another student who you’ll be mandated to meet with at least once a week to get your grades up.”

There a few telltale clicking sounds from her computer before she’s speaking up again to say, “It looks like the only available tutor for this semester is a student named Han Taesan. Do you know him?”

Admittedly only familiar with the few people who Jaehyun’s introduced you to, you shake your head no. You then have to try and push off the dread that builds inside of you at the thought of having to meet with a stranger once a week for the next two or so months until the semester ends.

You perk up as you watch your advisor’s eyebrows lift in surprise at something on her computer “It looks like he actually has office hours open right now until three. So, after this, I recommend you go see him and introduce yourself. It’s important that you get started right away so that you can begin correcting this situation. The last thing we’d want is for your financial aid to be affected, which – I should mention – will happen if you fail your classes again, Y/N.”

It’s at this warning that the reality of the situation finally hits you. 

As stupid as it now sounds, all of the times when you allowed Leehan to take up so much of your time in lieu of submitting your assignments were aided by a blind faith on your part that everything would work out in the end. 

But it’s in grave realization that you see how much you were gambling with your future by making such poor decisions. 

And with that feeling of shame and embarrassment weighing down on you so heavily, you leave your advisor's office a few short moments later, heading to the library to meet Taesan. 

As you’re leaving, you feel your phone buzzing in your pocket and unlock it to read a text that could not be more ill timed:

>leehan: what are you doing?

There couldn’t be any worse moment now than to receive such a message, after you’ve just been told that you could potentially lose your scholarship over your mindless decision making in regards to this man. And for perhaps the first time since you’ve met Leehan, you decide to let go of this manic-pixie-dream-girl image you’ve created for yourself, typing out a message that relays the completely honesty of your current situation.

>you: leehan, i failed my midterms. They’re putting me on academic probation and i might lose my scholarship. I don’t know that i’ll have much time for our “arrangement” anymore.

You stuff your phone back in your pocket right after sending it, caring little to know what Leehan will say in response. 

It’s in realization that you finally decide that making Leehan’s every thought, feeling and desire a priority in your life is a luxury you can no longer afford.

Arriving at the library a few minutes later, you wa;lw inside and observe how empty the place is. You suppose it makes sense given that most students have left for their fall break by now, not beholden to stay behind because of failing grades like you are. There’s a boy sitting by himself at one of the many tables in the library, a laptop and a few books surrounding him. You decide he’s the most likely to be the person you’re looking for and go up to approach him.

“Excuse me, are you Han Taesan?”

The boy, whose hair is uniquely marked by a streak of blonde in the back of it, looks up at you and nods.

“I’m not sure if you got the notification,” you say, pulling at your fingernails nervously. “But I’ve been assigned a tutor and you’re it. My advisor told me to meet with you today.”

Understanding finally dawning on the boy’s face, he puts down the screen of his laptop so he can fully pay attention to you and your presence. “Okay. What’s your name?”

“Y/N.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N,” he says, and even though everything from his voice and manners should have you inclined to feel less nervous, there’s something about his facial features that have you feeling intimidated. 

He’s quite good looking, but in a way that makes him seem unapproachable. 

“If you’ve been assigned to meet with me, that means you’re on academic probation, correct?”

Something about hearing those words, the assignment of your name next to the phrase academic probation , feels like a knife to the stomach. Still, the only thing you can do is nod grimly, and without intending it, you launch defensively into an explanation. “It’s not something I’m in the habit of, if that’s what you’re wondering. This is my first time, truly, and it’s just because I had a lot going on this semester.”

You expect Taesan to appear annoyed with you, just as you are with yourself when you hear those words leave your mouth. But you’re surprised when instead, he smiles. And when he does, it’s like the intimidating persona you built of him in your head immediately shatters and in place of it, you’re introduced to someone that seems really sweet.

“Listen, I know you’re probably feeling like a total failure right now. I know cause I’ve been there. But you don’t have to explain yourself to me, Y/N. The last thing I want to do is make you feel judged for something that so many students go through,” he explains, shrugging his shoulders to further communicate how little of an issue this is for him. 

“Most of the time, the people I tutor don’t even need me. They’re not dumb, they just were going through something that made them deprioritize their classes. We’ve all been there before. I’m just here to be an accountability partner and help you manage the stress.”

Fighting against all the parts of you that have been feeling shame in response to today’s development, you allow Taesan’s reassurance to wash over you like a cold drink on a swelteringly hot day. 

“You’re…really nice, Taesan,” you reply, thinking of no better way to express your gratitude. “I really needed to hear that.”

“No problem. If you’re free, we can go somewhere else and begin working on those late assignments. I don’t really like staying at the library because we’ll be forced to whisper like this the whole time.”

It’s only at his observation that you become conscious of the fact that you have been indeed whispering this entire time, and it is in fact, very burdensome. “Yeah, you’re totally right. Are you cool with coming to my dorm? I live on campus, in Commons.”

Grabbing his things, he gets up to follow you, and it’s at that moment that you realize just how tall Taesan is. “Sure. Let’s do it.”

Just as you’re about to leave with Taesan, you feel your phone buzzing in your pocket once more. And because you completely forgot about your earlier exchange with Leehan, you don’t even consider that the message could be from him until a picture that you’re immediately swiping out of lights up your phone screen.

>leehan: he misses you :((((( [img_6785]

The image in question is a dick pic, a full frontal image with Leehan’s smartly masked face just barely peeking out at the top as he angles his phone downward. 

You go from surprised to disgusted as you remember what the picture is in response to – a candid expression of anxiety about your academic probabtion – and suddenly, you couldn’t be more sure of the negative impact that Leehan has had on your life.

More sure that if you never heard from him after today, it would be the universe's greatest gift.

“Are you okay?” asks Taesan from beside you, and it’s with great gratitude that you observe his reaction is not that of someone who accidentally saw a dick pic on someone elses phone. Steeling yourself from the shock of the unexpected message, you hum an affirmative sounding noise in reply, and with that, you exit the library. 

You walk together to your dorm that’s only 5 minutes away from the library, and as you walk, you discuss a variety of things. How and why Taesan became a tutor, the circumstances which led to you transferring from your old school, and observations on how empty campus seems to be right now. Taesan, a music major, became a tutor once he learned he could get paid for what he already liked to do, which was teach people. The more you talk to him, the more assured you feel about this arraignment and your situation at large. 

More importantly, Taesan has the ability to do something you thought no man or object could be capable of – he takes your mind off of Leehan, and moreover the picture you just received from him.

Arriving at your front door, you can feel Taesan’s eyes on you as he says, “When I started my day today, I would’ve never guessed it would lead me to a girl’s dorm room.” You giggle at the genuinely funny joke, and now, you’re looking up at Taesan as if you’re fully seeing him for the first time. 

In just a short amount of time, you’re learned that Taesan is handsome, smart, nice, and funny. 

Perhaps something other than good grades could come of this time you’re about to spend together. 

In the time that you spend looking at Taesan, still smiling in the aftermath of his joke as you let him into your dorm room, you don’t notice the fact that Leehan is waiting for you down the hallway, armed once more with a bouquet of flowers. 

After last time, he figured surprise visits would be his thing now, especially since he knew your roommate wouldn’t be there to stop him. 

He wasn’t expecting, though, that there would be someone else who would act as a barrier between the two of you. 

Someone who causes unexplainable anger and resentment to blossom unusually in his chest. 

It’s in a blur of confusion – both at himself for reacting this way and at you for being with someone other than him – that Leehan turns around and rushes for the building’s exit before either of you can see him.

part 4 can be found HERE

taglist: @lailols @papichulomacy @0310s @softiwoon @gardenforwon @cherrytaesan @mryuyux @saintriots @lonelylandofan @cyber-tiny @keyywrld @isabellah29 @amarecerasus @cadidupped

comment or send an ask to be added to the taglist!

[moonstruckme]

I feel like Poly!marauders are sooo caring so maybe a dynamic where the reader is like an overly-insependent person and is not used to this kind of care and affection. Maybe it is reader’s first relationship so they have a hard time with the concept of leaning to others for support. Thank you in advance love!

Lmao this came wayyy too easily because I've definitely done all of these things! Thanks for requesting lovely <3

modern au

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words

"Where you headed off to, gorgeous?" Sirius looks up from his laptop as you step into your shoes.

"Grocery store," you say. "I'm thinking of making souffle tonight, would you want some?"

"Yeah, that sounds great." He grins at you in that way of his, and you know he knows your knees just went wobbly. "Want a lift?"

"Thanks, but the bus goes almost directly there."

Remus looks up from his book with eyebrows already furrowed in disapproval. "It's nearly dark out, love. You shouldn't be walking around by yourself this late."

You roll your eyes. Men. "I can handle myself, been doing it for years," you say as reassuringly as you can, slipping out the door before either of them can argue with you further. "I'll be back soon!"

You keep a hand close to the rape alarm attached to your bag as you maneuver your way through the shadowy streets. You've been tired since you woke up that morning, so a ride would have been nice, sure, but you don't want to become one of those girlfriends who relies on her boyfriends for everything. That was your biggest concern with getting into a relationship: losing the sense of self-reliance you've cultivated over your life. You don't need help from anyone, even if the big, strong men think you do. You huff a laugh to yourself.

The grocery shopping goes quick, soon you're back at your own front door. Sirius and Remus are almost exactly as you left them, both curled up on the couch, but now James is home from the gym. You know this, because he apprehends you as soon as you walk through the door, hair wet from the shower and dripping on your paper grocery bags as he attempts to take them from you.

"I've got them," you laugh, dodging him.

James gives chase. "You're carrying three! Let me take a couple."

"I can handle it." You kick at his ankle playfully, sniffling.

He pauses, and you take the opportunity to whisk the bags into the kitchen, setting them on the counter victoriously. "You feeling alright, sweetheart?" he asks.

"Yeah." You wave him off. "It's just chilly outside. Go relax, I'm about to start dinner."

James pouts but goes, flopping dramatically over the side of the couch. His head lands in Sirius' lap, and the other boy starts combing his fingers through the tangles of James' wet hair absentmindedly. Satisfied, you start setting out the ingredients you'll need, but a moment later Remus materializes beside you.

"You've been running around all day," he says. "Let me make dinner. You go relax."

"I don't mind," you say, slightly affronted. "I can handle dinner."

"Baby," Sirius pipes up, turning to look at you over the couch, "just let him do it. Take a—" he stops as you sneeze. "Are you sick?"

"No," you sniffle. "I don't think so."

Before you can move away, Remus has a hand on your forehead. "You're warm!" he says, in the same tone as one might say You're killing people and burying them in our backyard! A bit dramatic, in your opinion.

"Oh," you say, covering your face with your elbow as you sneeze again.

"Aw, angel," James says, your sole ally as Remus and Sirius look at you accusingly, as though they suspect you've been keeping this from them on purpose. Which....to be fair, isn't outside the realm of possibility. "Come sit with us, let us take care of you."

"Go," Remus says, moving his hand to the back of your neck and pursing his lips at whatever he feels there. "I'll make dinner, and some tea for you, yeah?"

You shake your head. "That's alright, I can—"

"Don't say you can handle it."

You huff, but it's clear you're not going to win this one. You go to the couch, where James accepts you with eager arms.

"Our poor girl," he coos, kissing every inch of your cheek sloppily. "Fuck, you are warm. You just need to take some time to rest, yeah?"

You sniffle grouchily, but Sirius pokes at your side, eliciting an unwilling snicker. "You could stand to let us help you out every now and then," he says, already seeming less upset with you. You suspect you have your illness to thank for that.

"I can take care of myself," you argue, but the fight is going out of you as you finally give into the cold you maybe sort of knew was coming on all day.

"We know you can, dove," Remus chimes in from the kitchen. "And that's what you've always done, but letting us take care of you sometimes isn't going to suddenly make you helpless, either." He shoots you a knowing look, too perceptive for his own good. And yours, apparently.

You sneeze again, jerking away from James so you don't spray on him. You feel disgusting, and pathetically vulnerable. Is this what they want you to succumb to? "I don't want to get too used to this," you say, voice small as you sniffle, wiping your nose on your sleeve, "and forget how to manage without your help."

Each of your boyfriends, even Remus, softens like butter in the sun.

"Baby." Sirius wraps an arm around you, looking at you with eyes so soft you feel like you could cry. "You won't forget. You're tough, and that's not gonna change just because you let us do some things for you, yeah?"

You look at your lap, contemplating. He's not not making sense. The idea of accepting help is so unfamiliar to you, it feels like a betrayal of your core values. But you love Sirius, and Remus, and James, and if what they want is to help you, maybe you can try to let them. Some of the time, at least.

Sirius curls a finger under your jaw, his thumb resting on your chin as he tilts your face up to his. He must see the concession in your eyes, because he smiles softly. It's almost an apology, and you know that he's aware of how difficult this is for you to give up.

"You're gonna have to get used to this, sweet thing," he says lightly, pressing a kiss to your overwarm forehead. "Because we're not letting you go."

[joohanisms]

xdh + soft intimacy 💭💫

i'm not god's strongest soldier. i need fluff too.

cw: disgustingly sweet fluff, suggestive for jungsu, junhan and jooyeon, biting in jooyeon's, 1 little gross comment in ode's.

gunil

soft slaps on the ass.

drying your hair for you <3333333

getting ready for bed together. just being side by side with him in parallel play fashion while you put on your skincare, brush your teeth, etc.

if he's done sooner than you are, his arms are around your waist and his chin is on your shoulder, just holding onto you while you finish getting ready to finally join him under the covers and cuddle until you fall asleep

wearing soft, comfy pyjamas to bed every night. he might have even got you a matching set :-( or maybe he bought a single set and gave you the shirt so you're literally wearing the same pyjamas :-(

likes to wear said shirt to bed when you're away </3

jungsu

taking showers together !!

it doesn't even have to go the sexual route (although sometimes it does), only washing up and helping each other with gentle touches is more than enough.

would know your favorite shower temperature by heart :-) my loveliest.

would take your shampoo and wash your hair soooo gently, massaging your scalp .. if you have any tangles, he'll take the conditioner and slowly go through them.

but as much as he loves taking care of you, he loves being taken care of.

wash his hair with the fancy hair treatment shampoo, massage his scalp, make sure none of the suds fall too close to his eyes. he melts every time.

when it comes to washing your bodies, this is where the danger is at. sometimes you'll get too touchy for it to be .. sfw .. but! most of the time it's just soooooo tender.

body wash suds everywhere, hands everywhere, the occasional tickle and/or pinch..

also, if he was alone and he missed you for whatever reason, he'd steal your body wash so he can try and curb the longing :-( it never worked.

jiseok

looklooklook. sciency booky boy. if you're in uni he's coming with you to wherever you go to study.

he knows practicing guitar might make you lose your focus, so he likes to read or look into science thingies!!

baby likes being close to you and no matter how different your lifestyles might be, he likes to be included :-)

won't let you overwork yourself though.

if you're in public, he'll gently pull you out of your bubble and suggest you go eat something, take a walk, whatever.

though if you're home, he can be more affectionate. he'll come behind you and massage your scalp, run his hands along your body and go baby, let's rest a little, yeah? i have snacks ready for you!!!

if you end up dozing off beside him on the couch he'll nearly pull a muscle trying to get a blanket without waking you up. you wake up because of the jostling and he's actually a little relieved tbh.

will go c'mon, let's nap in a bed. we don't want your neck to be stiff in class tomorrow :-(

seungmin

i'm so sorry to say this. if you have acne he Will go can i pop it pwease... idk if this is a common couple practice throughout the world but it is where i live . peak levels of intimacy = popping your partner's pimples for the oddly satisfying vibe

loves online shopping with you!!!

you would sit together with a laptop on your laps and go babeee you'd look so good in this !!!!

cocky little bastard he is, he might go you should see me/yourself without it ;-) the only way to make him stop talking or smiling like a fool is to kiss him.

then you often end up saving money because you simply forgot about shopping lmaooo

on a softer note, you'd would window shop through the internet, falling into rabbit holes. when you realise, you're looking into real state in minnesota or baby shoes.

even though those seem funny and really far away, your hearts grow a little warmer <3

hyeongjun

idk personally i love i adore boys that are not afraid to be vulnerable.

okay, when the pair of you were still too fresh, too shaky, jun would be more reserved and think he'd be bothering you.

when the relationship gets established/stable though, he would get clingier, softer, coming to you with his worries, leaving you to pet his hair and reassure him :-(

when taking a nap he'll cuddle up to you, head under your chin and making himself as small as possible, and it's so endearing to see your lanky boyfie trying to be tiny so he can be babied and cooed at .. little does he know you'd do that to him even if he was 3m tall.

now, sex wise: when he feels vulnerable and in need of affection, he might go 🥺 could you. uh. lead tonight 🥺 and he'd be theeeee softest warmest loveliest little sub

jooyeon

holding your titties non sexually when you are alone.

cuddling? boob in hand. napping? head on boob. stressed? free stressball.

they're just really warm and soft :-(

omnomnomnom his love language is biting.

will lovingly bite any body part in reach of his mouth. nips at your neck just to watch goosebumps rise in your arms.

might've bitten you too hard once .. was So apologetic, he never wanted to hurt you :-(

but when the bite would bruise eventually, he would like it a little too much. he won't open this can of worms right now though

[julietsbb]

Ok so its me again,,, i found the fic on twitter and proceeded to literally devour all of it. Actually just read so intensively and fixated that I almost tripped as I was walking out of the house. I couldn’t put it down.

The gradual change of intimacy between these two ENDED ME. I felt just like Phuwin — i felt like it wasn’t enough, like i went a whole day without blood when I reached the end of the thread.

The slight bouts of possessiveness from Phuwin??? Pond loving it!?! LOVING THE BITES. We don’t have his perspective and that makes it all the more compelling because you can STILL see how much he loves getting bitten. The way he rubs at his wrist and later on his neck HAS ME BY THE THROAT. Like God the man is gone, he wants those fangs in him 24/7 and I don’t blame him one bit.

And Phuwin??? The light hints of predatory satisfaction I SCREAM EVERYTIME. I just love how it all evolves so fluidly, how it contrast with the nearly (and i say nearly because we are privy to Phuwin’s thought process during it) professional acting scenes they do together. Their intimacy and care and want grows and it’s all so wonderful I could cry.

Him kissing the bites close, especially on Pond’s neck. I’m obsessed with that detail. And Pond’s casual reaction to it — like he doesn’t mention it once like its a normal thing. Like homies just kiss their homies’ necks like that all the tine.

When Pond asked if Phuwin could numb the biting spot less because he can’t feel it and he wants to feel it I was actually ascending. I was GONE. AND THE LAST SCENE????? Excuse my french but FUCK ME THAT WAS SO HOT

Pond gasping against Phuwin’s chest??? Phuwin being so giddy and satisfied with Pond’s reactions? He has no idea what he’s doing to that man. Pond is in literal bliss and Phuwin HAS NO IDEA (or maybe he does, and he loves it just as much as pond loves it.)

Pond’s softness as well. Like sweet lord he is so, so soft and so good for Phuwin and I���m in pieces. So pliant and so sweet and I can understand why Phuwin loves drinking from him.

Also I have to mention the bite scene in front of the bathroom mirror. Literally my favorite scene aside from the last scene. It was so charged with tension, so good. Phuwin just going for it, biting him while they stand, and Pond just folding, just baring his neck further and bracing against the sink and just taking it and Phuwin pushing him more against the sink— *incoherent screaming*

I love this fic. This au. I am a vampire for this fic. I want to sink my teeth in it. I want to see the boys crave each other and break apart for each other even more.

Okay I’m done with my adoring rambles. Thank you so much for writing this AU. It’s now become the reason for waking up in the morning.

kjfgsdgjsk i'm so overwhelmed by this ask i had to read it twice, once on my phone and once on my laptop and i still don't know where to start.

THANK YOU!!!!

I'm so so glad the slow build of intimacy works and feels natural for you! Like... their increased closeness increase their intimacy which increase their feelings, which in turn... you get it. they were primed for it, but it's the method/tool through which they fall in love, because they become closer in doing this together, they both grow into it and both explore themselves through it. Whilst having very little clue what they're doing and how deep they've dug themselves 😂😇

also please watch where you're going and don't fall like it's the highest compliment thank you but don't get hurt 🥺

i love phuwin's inner dynamic with his vampiric urges and how self-possessed of a person he is, usually. but also how he doesn't really have a hold on what's his vampire urges and what is... a different type of wanting. like they all appeared alongside each other so how to tell them apart? so much is happening inside phuwin that i don't blame him for not being able to separate all the ways in which he feels some type of want, for pond, and for him it's all very unexpected and out of nowhere. at least two parts of his types of want for pond is stuff he was unfamiliar with beforehand.

I do enjoy the neck kisses and i'm excited for when it feels right to escalate them 😊

i'm glad you thought that last scene was hot because that was extremely very much what i was going for lol - and the mirror bite too lol. there's very few ways in which 'bracing against the sink and just taking it' isn't going to be hot 😏

kdjjgfskjfgkasj thank you so so so much for your adoring rambles OTL OTL OTL they've really made my day 🙏

[syn4k]

He sat in his chair in front of his newly minted desk with a slight stretch upwards, facing the shining planks and gentle orange glow of the rest of house. A well-worn pen lay on the surface of the desk, next to a new notebook and a small cordial of black ink. Out of a small leather pouch came a small box, inside which rested a nib, which was then screwed onto the pen in place of the old one.

After months of travel, Pixl figured he'd take the long way round with his journaling tonight.

He hadn't had much time to jot things down ever since he'd shown up here- between running from spiders, trying to cobble (hah) enough diamonds together to craft a pickaxe, running from spiders, and visiting the Nether to make some horribly time-consuming roof tiles, he'd been a bit busy. But new worlds were always lots of work, after all, and he'd thrown himself into the hustle and bustle of getting started so many times that the routine was more like supple leather: worn and familiar, the actions practiced and almost a dance.

Ah. There his mind went, wandering again as it often did when he wasn't able to access a pen or paper or (more commonly) a reliable power source to plug his laptop or phone into. Some worlds didn't even *have* electricity as Earth knew it- redstone was just a crude spark of magic dust to them, but he'd gotten lucky this time. At least he'd be able to actually contact people without resorting to magical means.

The pen hovered over the paper, words momentarily forgotten, and with a sigh Pix set it to the paper and starting writing.

"June 6th-

The long gap between this update and the last has an actual explanation this time: I've finally found the world that Fwhip sent the details of, after weeks of getting lost. Walking out of time and space is really weird. I got there in the end, though, hence the new journal and the first entry.

It seems the universe is not done with Pixl the archaeologist, not yet. I arrived- (fashionably) late as I often am) -not in my regular outfit, but something very close to what I'd worn in the second world of Empires. I've discovered that I can pull some rather strange and downright improbable things out of gravel, including lapis lazuli, carrots, and once an entire cake that I refuse to touch. Shelby says it tastes fine, with a faint aftertaste of dirt. I have not asked why she knows what dirt tastes like, nor will I because I do as well.

This world is populated with most of the people who were on Empires but with a couple new faces as well. I'm familiar with Scar, of course, but I've heard of Owen- a pilot who crash landed here and is on a quest to get an origin of his own beyond human. Sausage told me that, and also cheerfully informed me that he blew up the poor lad's camera. I'll have to figure out how to make a new one and also inform him when we inevitably cross paths that being human isn't quite a bad thing.

I myself have spent the past few days seperated from contact with the rest of the world, though, busy running around and gathering samples of literally every cool looking rock I could get my hands on and unfamiliar fauna, including Nether reeds- the lava equivalent of sugarcane- and proceeded to spend the next three days weaving it into roof tiles. No regrets.

I know I'll be here a while, so I've gone ahead and built myself a nice little house on a stony outcrop. It has four wings with things like tinkering tables, my desk, a loft with my bed, and of course, the front door, because I'm not interested in phasing through walls. Again. That was a difficult month and a half.

That's about everything, I suppose. I've been building for two days. I'm going to go to bed now and probably sleep in."

The journal snapped shut with a satisfying thock, glass dinged as the cap was screwed back onto the jar of ink, wood creaked as two feet climbed the ladder, and then the little house was silent for the rest of the night and well into the morning.

[chaerssss]

✧*̥˚ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ....*̥˚✧ -2

ᴡᴏʀᴅꜱ:-25ᴋ

ɢᴇɴʀᴇ:- ʀᴏᴍᴀɴᴄᴇ, ᴅʀᴀᴍᴀ.

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ:- ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴀᴍᴇʀᴀ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰɪɴᴅ ᴘɪᴄᴛᴜʀᴇꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʀᴇᴍɪɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴ ᴜɴꜰᴏʀɢᴇᴛᴛᴀʙʟᴇ ᴅᴀʏ.

ᴛʏᴘᴇ:- ᴏɴᴇꜱʜᴏᴛ, ꜱᴄᴇɴᴀʀɪᴏꜱ, ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ꜱᴜɢɢᴇꜱᴛɪᴠᴇ.

Maknae line

Part 1

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People described you as a walking time capsule. Just because you liked clicking pictures and journal every little thing that went on in your life. Without realising you helped a lot of people in this way. It was a habit of yours to always carry a Polaroid camera, if not then the camera app was always open on your phone. It was because of your mother that you liked to treasure things... treasure moments, to feel the emotions that went through you at that exact time. So, here you are sitting on your couch. The drizzling outside calms you as you look through your Camera and walk through the memory lane of your love life....

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○Choi San○

"Look at me.."

"Pleaseeee..."

"Let me see your face."

"Y/nnnnn.."

San whined next to you on the bed in his extra large hoodie. Meanwhile, your eyes were stuck on the laptop screen. Fingers on the keyboard, typing words San had no interest in. "Just 5 more minutes. Once I'm done with this essay we can do whatever you want.." You tried to give hopes to San so that he'd stop distracting you. Besides, there was no way you'd be done within 5 minutes..You had just begun. 'Never' miss the deadline' an advise to yourself for the future.

San's hands snake under your pyjama shirt, his voice was now way deeper and breathy, and so close to you ear. "Anything..?" His soft touch sent waves throughout your body that felt like an electric shock. You physically shuddered and San already guessed he had the upper hand. "Hm? Is my princess getting turned on?"

Damn it, his lips won't leave your ear. These whispers were dangerous and you and San both knew it. They won't just end here. Gradually, you felt his lips graze your helix then slowly lick your earlobe. It was so satisfying that you found yourself clenching your thighs. Oh he knows what he does to you and he never leaves an opportunity to prove that. His teeth gently nibbled the soft skin on your ear slowly going downwards towards your neck. Meanwhile his hands caressed your abdomen. Gosh, this was too much. His breath on your skin, his warm hands touching you and his wet tongue circling your weak spot. The heat was becoming hard to handle.

Your eyes started to roll back and your body began to lose it's control. You hadn't realised the way you were leaning on San's body. Your head rested on his shoulder while his face was buried in the crook of your neck, devouring you. His hair tickled you and that just provided more to the pleasure.

There he goes again. With that smirk. Knowing he gets you all hot and messy. And that's when you came back to your senses.

"San!" You straightened your posture and wriggled away from your boyfriend who had been a bit too clingy today. "...Are you seriously going to fight your urge?" His honey voice asked curiously. "No...I mean, we can later. There's just...so much. I'm the one to blame, this was supposed to be done 2 weeks ago but 2 weeks ago we were..." You stopped mid-sentence to collect the memories and it hit you. Last time San had tricked you into having sex.

"Oh my god! It was You!!! It was because of you I forgot about my 15 credits worth of essay!" You gasped in realisation.

"Well, what can I say, I am such a sexy boyfriend that you couldn't resist." His smug smirk still pasted on his face and you were ready to snatch it off.

"Choi San forget about any intercourse for the coming 2 weeks!" You declared the punishment.

"...cuddles are still up right?"

"No!"

San left a loud a gasp as his eyes had now turned round and his mouth was shaped in an 'O'. "That's not fair. I atleast deserve cuddles?"

"You do, but it's for distracting me." Although it's my fault for being distracted. You thought.

His eyes narrowed and his lips formed into a pout, "You're mean. Not only to me but yourself too."

What does he mean-

"You're dripping wet Y/n." He spits the words so nonchalantly. However, you on the other hand, had gone scarlet. "Do you want me to ban the kisses too?" You threatened.

"Okay fine. I'll leave you and your...essay alone." San murmured as he got up from the bed taking his pillow with him and then spread the futon on the ground. He's sulking again and you find it adorable. You think how you would have never imagined for a man to go so crazy over you that if he didn't get to touch you, he'd sulk. A smile tugged on to your face which didn't go unnoticed by the latter, "What're you smiling about? You just washed down the dreams of your boyfriend." He said with a frown.

You chuckled but made sure he didn't hear. Once this essay is finished, you'll make sure your boyfriends 'dreams' come true. And you continued with the work. San put on his hoodie and laid on the futon. Hours passed by, until the clock hit 12 you hadn't moved from the bed.

It felt so good to close all the tabs and shutting down the laptop. However, it had been very quiet. Maybe, San really took it serious and was behaving. These were your thoughts until you peeked on the floor to find him laid on his stomach, asleep. It was weirdly funny to randomly find him in an unusual pose. Not even a leg or arm was out of line, he was straight as a ruler. And you wondered how was he breathing?

But you won't let this moment slide. You pulled your phone from the charger and took like a million pictures so that if San makes you delete one, you'll have a treasure full of them.

You turned him so that he could at least breathe properly, and as expected his face was all red and marks of the fabric of the pillow could be seen on his clear skin. You removed his socks and took the blanket to cover the both of you with a kiss on his forehead.

"Let's be together for... always."

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○Song Mingi○

Your fingers scrolled through the Instagram account of your boyfriend. Ex boyfriend. Eyes pooled with tears, looking at every picture he posted since yesterday with his new partner. He didn't even think twice before posting these. Now, it's just so obvious he cheated. All the pictures, stories, wishes were erased from his account just like the memories and plans you both had built together.

The tears fell on to the phone screen, breaking your focus from the pictures. Your eyes then gazed away in the horizon of the New York sky. 'Heartbroken in Manhattan.' If anyone's looking to write a biopic on me...use the title. The silly thoughts in your head didn't gain a smile from your lips.

The emails from work were already piled up but you had no motivation to look at one of them. Guess, breakup does hurt. So, now you find yourself in a café. The soft ambience, customers' low chatter and the beige aesthetic of the café made you a little too comfortable. You weren't here to order, you were just here to sit. To enjoy the peace and read the quotes on the walls. In hopes you'd be distracted. It was the best decision you had ever made.

"Emo alert!" The man with lush black hair spoke. "Wooyoung, how many times have I told you to keep your volume down?" Mingi, afraid he might get fired because of his mischievous, short friend. "oh come one, it's not like she heard us. She's way too stuck up in her memories at this moment, I bet. Plus, you can't seem to take your eyes off of her." Wooyoung side-eyed Mingi, who got caught in the act.

"So what she's pretty?" He blurted out. "Do you wanna give it a go?"

You rested your head against the clear glass and looked outside at the scene of people rushing here and there. Some were alone, some with friends and family, some with their pets and the other's with their partners. Making it a little too obvious. "2 whole years and this is when you decide to show me the most clingy couple on the date I got cheated on." You murmured, blaming the god for the sudden boost of couples in the streets.

"Mam would you like to order?" You turned your head to the voice. A man about 6 foot tall stood there with a white button up and an apron that had the logo of the café written in cursive. His blond died locks caught your attention. That colour fit him perfectly. Not to mention his eyes... piercing eyes gazing at you softly. "Mam?"

"No I'd like...to stay here for a while." You respond but he doesn't move from his position. "Uh...is there something-" you started but were interuppted by the stranger, "My name's Mingi. And you look a little too pretty for me to not notice."

Oh boy. Is he trying to ask me out? Your thoughts ran at the speed of a horse. It's true since yesterday, this was the first thing you felt and it kinda made you feel alive. "You're aware that you have a name tag on your apron right?" You informed, and his ears had already turned red.

"So, you get what I'm trying to say right?" His hands now rested on your table and he was way too close for someone you just met. "Wait till my shift ends.." and he left. Wow, who does he think he is? Does every other man on this earth think they can tell me what to do and how to feel? I'll leave right away.

The wind slapped you in the face due to the bus that passed by you in a high speed. The temperature had dropped, it was already past 9 so a shiver ran down your spine and instinctively you held both your arms. "Are you cold?" The same voice startled you from behind.

Yes, you ended up taking his offer. You admit that it was pretty desperate but come on, if it buried down the pain of a heartbreak, then it's fine. "No I'm fine." You uttered through your chittering teeth. Mingi chuckled as he walked besides you on the pathway, "So, what's got you sulking huh?"

"I think it's easy to guess, isn't it?" You said, clenching the strap of your sling bag. "Yes, I got my heartbroken. And that's not even the worst part. He cheated on me and I don't even know for how long, and as soon as he broke up with me with the shittiest excuse of how 'he doesn't deserves me', he's posting pictures that were taken behind my back as if it won't hurt me."

You paused and took a deep breath. Tears once again captured your eyes but you didn't want to break in front of someone you just met. "It's okay to cry you know? I promise I won't judge." And in seconds Mingi started hearing sniffles. "Yeah..." You started, with gasps, "Considering I just told you the reason I broke up..." You stopped again and hiccuped, "...so pitiful right?" And you continued with your crying.

Mingi's leg halted, because you had stopped. From the moment he had seen you he just couldn't process the beauty you had. Was it possible for someone to look like this? But when you sat on the table, all alone, with an expression that melt him like an ice-cube - he just wanted to punch the douche who made you feel this way. "Hey..." He came forward to face you, "How could someone possibly be so dumb to leave a person like you? That's the sole question right now. But you know what?"

His big hands cupped your face, and wiped your tears with his thumb, "If he hadn't done this, I probably would have never met you." His eyes looked straight in yours. It sent butterflies in your gut, but it's really weird, why would he care so much? He just met you. And why is it that he has such a huge impact on you? His skin is so soft, and he looks at you as if you're in the only girl in this whole universe. It made your heart beat 2x faster.

"...Y/n. My name, if you cared to ask." You tried to change the topic but his sweet words won't stop, "I already called you mine."

"You know that i won't fall in love this easily right?" You were now at the rooftop of some hotel Mingi insisted to go to, "Of course, i know you won't. That's why I have everything planned. First we go on a date, then on another date and we keep dating until you fall in love. It's okay though, if you want to stop whatever we have going on." He rambled on and you laughed at his attempts to be sly. And when you smiled like that...his heart skipped a beat.

It was like sparkles surrounded you, "You..." He pointed at you and your smile faded away, "What?.." you asked out of curiosity. "Don't show that smile of yours to other people, alright?"

And that just made you smile more. Until, he got all into your personal space, "Smile like this whenever I'm around you, I don't want anyone else to steal you." He spoke in his husky voice. Oh my god, is this happening? Already? Is he going to kiss?

His finger extended and pushed your forehead as he got up to stand near the railing, "By the way, why the heck didn't you block his insta account already?"

You were all flushed what could you've said, "...i..have no idea." That's when he looked back and smiled brightly that it could light up the whole town, as he motioned you to stand besides him and enjoy the city lights. I guess that's when you knew you'd spend the whole life together.

"Let me take a picture of you!" You called out from behind.

You still have that picture on the side table of your bed, in hopes of getting back with him. Guess, you predicted it all wrong.

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○Jung Wooyoung○

"Excuse me, where are the flavoured coffee pouches?" You asked the worker as you couldn't find your favourite coffee packs anywhere today. "Sorry ma'am but the coffee packs are finished." Oh come on, not today. The thing is, it's your exams. Which means you'd need caffeine. Tons of it. You were a smart kid, you had already done quite the amount studying beforehand but being a perfectionist has it's perks. A day prior to your exams, nervousness and anxiety had captured you and you had been studying for almost the whole day. Until your coffee finished.

"There must be some? Any tea or something?" You asked because if there's no coffee there's got to be a replacement. "Um, oh yes we do have lavender flavored teas but they're limited." First of all, LAVENDER?? Your mind went nuts because people actually drink this. Well not to be blame others you're also a big fan of mint-chocolate. You pushed back your spectacles, "Yeah sure that'd work." "Please follow me.."

You tailed behind the tall man into the next aisle. As you reached there you saw just one pack settled on the shelf, there it was. It was surrounded by sparkles, it was your treasure. You wasted a little too much time in staring at it and some guy came and had already picked it up.

No, you can't let this happen. No way. You have to ace the exam, and for that you'd need that lavender tea. "Excuse me!" You called out for the man dressed in all black, only his eyes visible because his face was covered by mask. "Oh hey four eyes!" The strange man blurted out. Your eyes went wide and your eyebrows furrowed to his absurd response. "Excuse me?" You say in defense. He finally turns his full attention to you and puts back down the packs of snacks and your lavender tea in his shopping cart. "What?"

"You know it's not right to call people names based on their appearance!" You taunted while your narrow eyes shot daggers at him. "But you don't get so defensive when Hongjoong calls you that." He pointed out your sheer biasness towards your crush. But how does he know Kim Hongjoong anyway? Your expression twisted into that of confusion, "How do you know Hongjoong?"

As if on command, he removed the black mask to reveal his face. Oh good lord, he's Jung Wooyoung. The troublemaker of school and Hongjoong's close friend. "Does this makes sense now?" He leaned in closer which made you back up a little, "You make it so obvious you have a sweet little crush on him." Why did he make your blood boil so bad? You rolled your eyes and walked by him to reach his shopping cart. Finally, your hands took out the sweet item.

"What're you doing?" He asked. "Taking what's mine." Your answer made Wooyoung scoff, "It doesn't have your name on it. Plus I took it first."

Oh Jung Wooyoung, He may be the school's troublemaker but here, right now, you are the queen who is high on caffeine. He has already lost this war. You devilishly chuckled and took out a pen out of your sweatpants pocket. "Oh look what we have here!" You gave a dramatic shocked expression and then proceeded to write your name on the pack, "Now it does, and for your information, My eyes saw it first."

You proceeded to check out but couldn't get rid of the person you accidentally met. He's following you like a lost puppy found in a garden. "What do you want?" You stopped mid-way and turned behind which caught Wooyoung off-guard, "Trying to talk to you." He stated. "Yeah sure, or you could be trying to murder me for taking a tea pack." Wooyoung lowly chuckled as he was now slowly making his way towards you, "Murder for a tea pack? You for real think I have no standards." His body hovered you, you weren't that short, an adequate amount of height was gifted to you so Wooyoung didn't have to completely look down at you. However, one thing he never failed to notice was you. Uh-huh.

His group is quite the thing in the high-school. And you attend it together. As they say 'With great power, comes great responsibility.' The million times Hongjoong has told this to Wooyoung, it doesn't seem to faze him. Which is why he became the troublemaker. He has a reputation among girls because of his 'bad-boy' personality. More like a player. But guess, girls are a sucker for that. Eating other's lunch, taking their money, causing problems for teachers, pranking students, being almost all the time in detention.

And yet, he never failed to notice you. Ever since the first day of his school he has been keeping an eye on you. And you seem to be clueless, drowned in the hopes of Hongjoong. How to break it you he doesn't think of you like that at all? That's right, he couldn't. Because he knew it would shatter you in pieces. But what he could do, was make you fall for him.

He peeked in your your polythene, "You're having a rough night i presume." He remarked which made you look at your bought items and hide it behind yourself. "So many chocolate bars and different types of caffeine drinks. Tsk, guess the nerd hasn't studied enough?" He looked at you with the eyes of hyena, You were well aware of his persona so you knew better. "Whatever you're planning for Jung Wooyoung, I won't fall for it."

"A meal." He began. "What?" You were surprised. "Let me prepare you a meal."

"Why?"

"Just because."

"You'll poison me!"

"Hmm, I'll think about it."

You stood there observing his now sweet experession. No, a fake experession. The one where it looked like he had pasted a smile over his face and his eyes got closed due to the pressure of overdoing it. He wasn't going to stop messing with you any soon. You weren't gonna waste your time arguing with this asshole. So you just let him do what he wants, while you study.

"Where do you keep the spices?" Wow, what a turn of events. The man you cursed with your life, is standing in your kitchen. "It was your wish, now do whatever it takes to prepare a meal for me. I'll be in my room." You stormed off, leaving a man in the kitchen you don't trust with your pen. Funny but your first priority was this exam. Especially because the teacher had provoked you and that just meant you doing more than you could to prove a point. Ego is a bitch. An hour later a knock interuppted your intense study session. You open the door and the delicious smell of the hot food greeted you, "Care to join me downstairs?"

The first question you asked him was why he hadn't left yet, "because i was serious when I said I wanted to prepare a meal for you." Was what he said. Neither had you or Wooyoung thought it'd become a daily thing. He comes by every night around 9PM, prepares food and you both eat it together. It was such a small gesture, you don't even know why he wanted to do it first but lately you've been having peaceful sleep and you've been eating healthy.

"Guess , you aren't that bad people make you out to be." You whispered behind his back. "Hey, should we buy Kimchi?" He turned back to question and found you with your phone angled towards him, "Smile!" he cracked a pose that completely contradicted his personality at school.

Oh you were so sure you'd marry a man named Kim Hongjoong in the near future. Look at you now, sitting at the dinner table while you watch your husband cook a meal for you.

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○Choi Jongho○

"Me too hahaha..." Laughing had never been more painful. As a kid you had always thought of rich people as supreme guys, fun as well, had inside jokes and were all in all a package. You were wrong. They weren't fun, not supreme at all and never had a joke to make. So, how did you end up in a high status party where you pretend to know everyone and laugh at their stupid humour where they basically mock people below them.

Well, Choi Jongho, a chaebol held something against his parents. He wanted to prove to them that life wasn't all money, and he thought what better way there is than to pretend a relationship with a random girl? What were the chances that that 'random girl' would be you? 100 per cent.

See, you worked in the sales department of the famous 'Choi Markets' and you had seen the son of your boss quite a few times. Particularly, one time when you were heavily drunk at a party and he had happened to give you a ride and you kissed him as a thank you! You wanted the land to swallow you alive. So, it was either you play his pretend girlfriend and get paid or get fired for kissing him and be money less. Pretty threatening. But with the debts you had, this seemed like the best option. For now maybe?

"This can't happen Jongho! You know these type of people, they're all for money and besides she is an employee. You cannot date her whatsoever." Your boss, alternatively, your pretend boyfriends father thundered in the living room with his words. You were terribly shaking, "And it is fine for you to marry me off to anyone just for money?" Jongho deadpanned with his words. He was ice-cold to others, even when you were an employee you had never seen him smile. Your co-workers often gossiped about his personality but that wasn't true at all. It was obvious, he was raised to be this way. Cold and dangerous. Disguising his true colours. They said he never spoke but only you knew...he never shut up.

"How is it that none of you people recognise my one need!" His voice had now raised, "Haven't I done enough Father? In fact, what haven't i done? I went on a shit ton of business dates, signed a million of contracts, maintained the reputation of our company!" He paused to breath, "All i ask is to be with the person I adore. Someone I know would stay with me even beyond business." His voice lowered, and you gazed at his side profile. This wasn't the first time you had appreciated his beauty. Every time you'd see him, you would observe his features, his stance, the way he walked... A godsent Man for sure.

His hand interlocked with yours while his eyes still remained at his father, "So know this, if i don't get y/n... I'm as good as dead." With that he tightened his grip and stormed off. As soon as you came outside the main gate, he held your from your waist and pulled you closed. Your hands automatically rest at his chest and he closed the distance between you with a kiss.

Goosebumps spread all over your skin. There was no way this was happening. His lips were so soft you could melt. The gaurds standing near the gates had turned their heads away, but it already felt like they weren't there anymore. It was just you and him. He broke the kiss off and you tried hiding your flushed, scarlet face with your palms. "Y/n.." he uttered as his hands gently took your in his and revealed your state. "I think...I think i can love you." Your eyes met with his, completely dazed.

"If it's okay with you, would you like to go on a date?"

And that's how you were sitting in an open cafe, under the blue sky. Thinking back, Jongho had been uptight and grumpy. He didn't know how to express his emotions and well, he didn't let himself enjoy little things. You on the other hand were a complete opposite of him. So it's safe to say you transformed him with your sunshine personality in 3 months. Or maybe, he just felt more comfortable being himself around you. And you didn't mind it. In fact, you loved it. You loved him.

"What are you smiling for?" You teased the latter, knowing well why he was smiling. "nothing.."

You sneakily took your phone out and clicked a picture of him. By the way, you got caught. "Ok fine, I'll delete it." You proceed to do what you know Jongho would tell you to do but get interuppted by him. "Why would you? Aren't you going to let your Instagram followers know you're taken? Especially that Hyunjin.."

You chuckled at his response and posted it on Instagram as he said. What fairytale was life ever since you met him. Universe, truly does make out the oddest pairs.

°:. *₊ ° . ° .•°:. *₊ ° . ° .•°:. *₊ ° . ° .•°:. *₊ ° . ° .•

[purplesurveys]

1924

survey by robotyque

RULES: For the following questions, you must answer a number in a scale from 1-10. You may add a comment/description following it. Here we go.

ON A SCALE FROM 1-10..

How exciting was your day? 10. It was actually a productive Sunday! After church we had lunch at Yabu, bought a microwave to replace our broken one, went window shopping for a new laptop and a PS5, I bought a bunchhhhhh of Me Stuff in one go (BB cream, blush, reed diffusers...you get the gist), went for a quick grocery run to get milk and also managed to take Max to the vet clinic before they closed. It was so much stuff done that I can't believe it only totaled a little over than 4,000 steps LOL

How happy do you feel right now? I want to say a 7.5. Today was well-spent and I like that my family and I got along today (we always clash after a few consecutive hours together...), but that high's coming down now because it's already 5:40 PM and the weekend will soon be over.

How clean do you feel? A healthy 9. I took a shower today and my room now smells like ocean because I have two reed diffusers going at the same time, but I just feel 'dirty' because I've still got acne on my face and I don't like that.

How full in the stomach? 7. I had a big lunch that's long settled in my stomach now, but while it doesn't feel heavy I'm also not hungry. And I doubt I'd be feeling hungry anymore for the rest of the day.

How thirsty? 1. I have a chocolate Oatside with me now that I'm sipping from every few minutes.

How bored? 1. I did so much stuff today that I have no problem just filling this out and being friends with the silence and overstimulating myself like what I'd usually look for on weekends.

How tired/sleepy? 3. I feel like I could fall into a nap if I made myself lie down, but I'm alert and awake for the most part.

How satisfied with life atm are you? 4. My job makes me MISERABLE and question my abilities and worth every single day. It's a thankless 9-5 where you can do your best and put in 150% effort but still only ever get seen and called out when you make a mistake/don't meet expectations. I know I will be happier if I set out to look for greener pastures; but I just can't help but stay for now knowing the team is suffocatingly incomplete as it is and me leaving would just make everyone else suffer so much more.

How satisfied are you with your relationship status? 10. Nothing to complain about, ever.

How satisfied are you with your friends? 8. I love all of them, but I wish some of them (i.e. my college friends) would put in more effort in keeping up our friendships. I don't take it personally, though; I've also accepted the fact that our friend group may just not rank high on their priorities at this point anymore, and that's fine.

Now what about family? 6. We are very dysfunctional but we make it work.

How entertained are you atm? 7. I have a Good Mythical More running in the background and I've gotten sidetracked from this survey a few times, so I'd say that's entertainment in effect haha.

How bright is the room you’re in? 2. All the lights are off so it's actually super dark here, but my laptop is set to the highest brightness level and that more than balances out the darkness.

How loud is your music/sound you hear? 2.5. Out of the 16 volume bars on my laptop, it's just until the fourth bar so that's literally a 2.5 if my math is correct.

How confident are you about your looks right now? 4. There's a nasty acne scar near my nose that just won't go away. It's affected my confidence a little bit so that's why I headed to the store today to grab a bunch of face care and makeup stuff.

How clean is your room? 9.5. There are just a few things lying around but otherwise the place is spotless.

How much do you love dolls/stuffed animals? 5. Stuffed animals are very cute :)

How satisfied are you with your room? 9. I really really love the loft bed we've built in here since it gave my room so much more space. The one lacking point is just on me, because I haven't been buying any furniture or even just any sort of accent, really, to give my room more of a personality.

How much do you love dogs/cats (pick one)? 11. No-brainer. I like animals more than people.

How well do you do in school? 7. I did well if I really liked the class, but barely put in effort for classes I just felt 'forced' to have, like chemistry and philosophy. In other words I lacked focus and discipline; I feel like I would have had much higher scores across the board if I just powered it through and did a better job pretending to give a fuck about the classes I hated.

How well can you read out loud? 10. Never had a problem with it.

How good are your eyes? 3. I need my glasses, otherwise everything would be hazardous for me.

IF… (REMEMBER, IT’S STILL ON A SCALE OF 1-10)

If your significant other cheated on you, how mad would you be? 10. I'd be so mad I'd turn quiet and simply cut off ties.

What if it was with your best friend? 20. 10 for the SO cheating, 10 for my best friend betraying me and cheating on her fiancé.

You found a toonie on a ground, how happy would you be? 0. I'd be confused and would be asking what a toonie is.

You lied to a friend about something semi-big, how guilty would you feel? 5. Depends on the lie.

You accidentally took something from a store, how guilty would you feel? 10. I did this once when I walked out of a bookstore with a box of crayons I forgot to pay for. I felt really bad and turned to make my way back immediately.

You were given some illegal substance, what would you feel/how much of it? This question doesn't make sense but I would say 0 which stands for, "I'd stay away from it even if it were the last thing on earth."

You spent $300 for yourself, how satisfied would you feel? 5. Satisfied, yes; but also equally guilty/feeling bad because that is so much money to spend on myself.

What about for others? 7. It's a lot of money, but I'd feel better if I made someone else happy with that money.

How angry would you feel if your parents forgot your birthday? 10. How do you forget your kid's birthday?

Lastly. On a scale of 1-10, how entertaining was this survey? 10! I've taken this before but it was still fun to take the second time around!

[sentientcave]

WIP WEDNESDAY - 141 Paranormal Investigators

BEST TIME OF THE YEAR EVERY WEEK. WIP WEDNESDAY BAYBEE Had this silly idea for a fic where the lads are like, youtube ghost/monster hunters who get accidentally stranded in a weird American town. I haven't been working on it very much because I really want to get Impound done next but this is such a fun concept I really want to revisit it soon.

I have a lot more plotted out for it than I do for Impound but I'm not really a planner so who knows what I'll keep and what I'll toss. But feel free to ask me about it if you've got questions! I went on about this with everyone's favourite black cat, Morg, for like a full afternoon so I have a lot to say.

“— And while we didn’t find any sign of hauntings in this forgotten corner of Washington state, we did get to see some truly facinating peices of America’s history during the Gold Rush.” “Thanks for watching! Don’t forget to like and subscribe, and follow us here and here for more updates on our Great American Roadtrip!”

“Not bad, Si,” Gaz said, closing the laptop with a satisfied snap. “Once we get to the motel we can upload it.” “Do ye always have to use such unflatterin’ shots of me?” Johnny asked, pouting a little in the backseat next to Gaz. “I didnae do all that much yellin’, but from tha’ ye’d think it was all I was ever doin’.” “I’m jus’ givin’ the people what they want, Johnny,” Simon said, eyes laughing. “And it’s you wet, shirtless, scratched up and screamin’ bloody murder.” “I wasnae screamin’,” Johnny protested, running a hand over his shaggy mohawk. “I was just expressin’ myself.” “Loudly,” Gaz added, helpful as ever. “And in a very high frequency.” “Awa’ an’ bile yer heid, ye fuckin’ roaster. I wasnae screamin’.” “Sounded like screamin’ to me,” Price said, giving the two younger men in the backseat a stern look through the rearview mirror. “Now settle down. I’m not listenin’ to six more hours of this.” “Might be more’n tha’,” Johnny said, leaning forward, hooking a brawny arm over Simon’s shoulder, blue eyes scouting the valley below as they crested another bump in the road. “Traffic ahead. S’never a good sign when there’s vehicles lined up in the mountains.” “Bloody hell,” Price grumbled. “Why’s this country got to be so fuckin’ big?” “Where’s that bloody map?” Simon asked, yanking the glove box open. “Maybe there’s a way around.” “Might no’ be a good idea,” Johnny said uneasily. “We could get lost easy.” “You want to sit in fuckin’ inchin’ traffic for twelve hours?” Simon asked. “There’s a road off here—” He held up the map and jabbed his finger on a side road off the main highway. “Just before that bloody mess. It’ll be on the left— Take us up and around, looks like.” “Why is no one else takin’ it then?” Johnny asked, voice gaining the extra burr it always did preceding an increase in volume. He wasn’t shouting yet, but all three of the others knew the signs to look out for. “No one uses physical maps anymore,” Gaz said soothingly. “Maybe it got unlisted. Private road? If someone stops us we can always turn around.” “I’m takin’ it,” Price grunted, turning off of the paved asphalt road and onto the narrower gravel one. “I’d rather be movin’, at least. If I wanted to sit in traffic I’d drive around London.” “Oh suit yerselves.” Johnny pushed himself back into his seat and crossed his arms. “Don’t listen to the fella that actually grew up around anythin’ bigger than a hill. Noo, wouldnae wan’ ta do tha’.” “Relax, Soap.” Price used his stern teaching voice, the one that could command a rowdy hall of college students (most of whom only took his class because they thought it would be an easy credit) to be quiet and pay attention. “If we get lost you’ll get to gloat about bein’ right, how about that?” “Rather no’ get lost, but Ah suppose it’ll do.”

[mymemoirs]

Life Update: Buying My First Gadget

It was 14th February 2024, coincidentally a valentine's day, when I went to a gadget store to purchase my first ever gadget with my hard-earned money. Needless to say, it was kinda satisfying...?

I have been showing off my tablet to close friends. I'm quite happy that I decided to buy it anyway since I've been going back and forth about it. Originally, I was set on buying Huawei Mattepad 11" Papermatte edition because of its paper-like screen.

However, when I went to the Huawei pop-up store and had a chat with the sales, they recommend buying the Huawei Mattepad 11'5" which is on a discount. There's pros and cons for each model but I eventually settle down with the cheapest one, which is the one I'm using currently: Huawei Mattepad 11'5" with all the complete accessories I wanted (keyboard, stylus and a matte screen protector). It's 3 million cheaper than the original tablet I wanted with the same accessories.

Now, I know what some people might be thinking. Why a tablet and not a laptop? Considering that my laptop also needs an upgrade. Well, I always felt laptop was too 'serious' in my opinion. What I had in mind at that time was something that I can use to do a little work, write, and read a book with. My phone is kinda small for reading. You could still use it for reading but I desire for a bigger screen.

Do I read e-books in this tablet during my commute? Naw, I haven't done that. What I have done instead is blogging, preparing my materials for presentation and updating my finance sheets. Which is not a bad start.

A lot of my friends said to me: "Good investment" when they saw this tab. Well, I hope so 'cos at some point I'm worried that I might be just satisfying my 'wants' which is not always bad. I also tried to hold myself back from buying it immediately ever since I had the thought in 2023.

I do wanted to get productive, write more and create. I'm not sure if I could do that but I need to cut myself some slack and just write rather than waiting for a magnum opus. Whether it's a good or bad writing, I should just write. It's actually a boring, often frustrating, activity.

Sometimes I thought what hinders me from writing is not able to come up with ideas. But, I believe, I have the ideas as it's all within me. I'm the one who has been blocking it off from getting it out to the world. That's why, this 2024, I'll just learn to let go of perfectionism and write.

-Reina

[catholicdaredevil]

newsflash asshole, chapter one || matt murdock

i'm really really so anxious to post and start this it's my fucking baby and i'm so excited for it i just hope it lives up to the hype in my head and in all of yours too

this is chapter one of twenty five and it's just setup for reader

words: just over 2k

ao3 link

series masterlist

gif credit: @saradanversrogers

“One of these days that nose of yours is gonna get you into more trouble than you can handle.”

“I’m not so sure about that dad, I can handle anything.”

“I know you think so goose, but be careful.”

-

Maybe he had been right. This kind of job didn't lend itself to early nights, or stress free weekends. No, it had you staring at your laptop screen, that burned your eyes after all of these hours, six cups of coffee in at three in the morning. This was a job that had you so stressed you felt like pulling out your hair, and giving up at least twice every case. A job that frequently gave you four new questions for every answer. That had you digging so often you sometimes worried you wouldn’t realize until too late that your hard work was only for it to be your own grave.

There was an answer there, somewhere simmering under the surface, you could feel it. All it needed was just a little more, and it’d crack open under your touch. At least that's what you told yourself, justification for the past couple weeks run ragged. Hours and hours spent doing research online, tracking down people and stories and any clue you could possibly get your hands on. You know what he’d say if he could see you right now, eyes sunken in dark circles, surviving solely off way too much caffeine for one person, and spite.

“Goose, you can’t find anything with your eyes half closed.”

“Half closed, dad, what does that even mean?”

All of your hard work leading up to tonight, you had almost all the pieces by now, just missing one final one. A big one, and the picture would be complete. Despite the low buzz of excitement from being close to the end you’d learned long ago to never take what you thought was complete to mean there was truly nothing left, too many times you’d almost put out a story to realize your picture was only done because you hadn’t bothered to zoom out and see the peripherals.

That was when you were young and foolish, running in thinking you could Nancy Drew a solution without a plan. You weren't nearly half as reckless as you had been, years of experience for better or worse had taught you an important lesson. Caution. Cutting corners was too dangerous, not when the stakes were this high and any misstep could mean lives on the line.

Like yours.

Yeah, something like that.

While the years might have taught you caution, they bred routine. Planted and watered, nurtured and grown until roots went so deep they wound into your core. You had a system for everything, a contingency plan for your contingency plan. Too often plan B turned C and D and you couldn’t afford to not be prepared. So you dug, shovel in hand, dirt caked under your fingernails, insistent to uncover every crack and crevice, leave no stone unturned. There was always more if you were willing to look for it. The most vital part of your customs was used when strings got too tangled, when clarity took too long, and answers felt too muddled. Pulling out a thick notebook and digging through the drawer in your desk it came from until you found a pen, the cap chewed to hell from last time. You began scribbling, writing out everything you knew, from the beginning.

It was simple really; write it all down. If you’d written it all down then write it all down again.

It helped to do this, to refresh the facts in your head to see the dots that needed connecting, be able to touch them under your fingertips in a way that a computer could never satisfy. Things that had made no sense before often clicked into place on this step, hidden carved-out pathways of connections buried so deep they were thought lost.

Once everything was written out you paused, pen cap once more finding a place between your teeth as you pondered. Lines connected pieces from one page to another, segues that wouldn't have made sense to anyone looking in on your work, a connect-the-dots with a picture only you could fully form.

It felt like several more hours that you scanned the pages methodically before the loud buzz of your phone startled you out of your focus. The muscles in your neck ached, making their annoyance at your posture very well known, you stretched them this way and that, listening to the crack of stiff joints as you snatched the incessant phone off the wood beside your laptop and checked to see who was calling.

Karen Page

“Hey Karen, what are you doing up?” Her soft chuckle came through the phone and you couldn't help but smile. She had become a really good friend in the year since you’d met, the news world a worse place for her leaving to go back to Nelson, Murdock and now Page.

“I might have something for you and I figured you would be up at this ungodly hour,” shit, she knew you too well.

“You figured right, whatcha got for me?”

Karen didn't hesitate to spin into her story, an informant she’d worked with a couple times back when she was at the Bulletin had heard that she and you were somewhat close and got a message to her. She couldn't tell for sure just how reliable his information was, it had been hit or miss before based on whether he was using, but he was right more often than not and any lead was better than no lead.

“There's just one catch.”

Your eyebrows raised and you leaned back in your chair. Now this was new, Karen had never withheld anything from you before, aside from that one time. Even then it was less her refusing to tell you, and more her asking you not to push. So if she had a string attached to this, it had to be important.

“O-kay, I’ll bite.”

“Go to a party with a friend of mine.”

“What?”

“There’s a benefit this weekend, stuffy and annoying, yes, but we’re all going. Join us, meet a friend of mine, the friend of mine.”

Ahh, there it was. The friend of hers, you’d asked her a couple months ago for an introduction. She’d agreed, but said it would take time, that he needed space for now. Stability. You of all people could understand that, so you thought no more of it forgetting you had even asked. This was an interesting turn of events, and you'd most likely be able to wrap everything up before then anyways.

“Does he know, or is it one of your and Foggy’s ambushes?” Karen hesitated with a sigh, you'd come to that conclusion a lot faster than she'd hoped. Not surprising, it hadn't taken you long to figure things out before why should this be any different.

“It's an ambush,” no point in lying now, and you hummed in thought. It sounded like a bad idea, ambushing a man like that but you'd really wanted to meet him for a long time, and how many chances would you get.

It didn’t quite matter, your mind made up before she’d even finished the offer. “Alright, deal. Now where can I find your little informant?”

-

Which brought you here, to a stuffy party you’d never attend of your own free will. Uninterested in schmoozing with rich annoying assholes, with rich annoying asshole interests. Having had to dig so far into your closet you weren’t sure how you didn’t get lost, just to find the one dress you had that semi fit the description of formal. One you’d originally bought for some date planned years ago, dark green satin that draped delicately across your chest, fabric ending just below mid thigh. The date had fallen through, and so had the guy, and the dress had sat untouched and forgotten until tonight.

It had felt weird getting ready, dressing up, like putting on a show. Putting on a costume and getting ready to play a role, the performance of pretending to care. About these people or their thoughts or opinions, especially the thoughts and opinions having to do with you. Certain you’d made unspoken enemies out of more than a few of the people bound to be in attendance, the rich socialite type did tend to like their business to be in the dark. In back alleyways, and small font, whispered catches and hidden traps. All things that were extremely difficult to do with a nosey, stubborn reporter shining light into corners, and hacking through endless red tape, broadcasting any and everything they found on their way to the bottom.

The whole situation had you anxious, out of your depth. Had you not agreed to this, had Karen’s information not been the final crack in the case that you’d needed to finish it out, you might not have been here. Yet here you were, a glass of wine in one hand trying to hide off in the back by the bar until your friend showed up. Eyes glued to your phone as you waited for her to text you, she’d promised to let you know when they got there.

Pulling up now.

You pulled in a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves and clear your head. When that didn’t work you quickly downed your drink and headed towards the doors. Skirting around people like a maze, trying to not get noticed on your way by. You didn’t want anything getting in the way of this meeting, you’d been looking forward to meeting him for so long, the idea of him so built up in your head from all you’d heard about him from Karen.

She thought the world of him, it showed in more than just her words too. The way she spoke about him, the conviction in which she defended his actions, actions that weren’t even publically attributed to him. It was hard to not wonder, not be interested in seeing for yourself if he was just as good of a person as she made him out to be. Not that you thought she would be lying, but sometimes it was easy to see the best in your friends, your family, and that they were.

Family.

The three of them so convoluted they were almost one being, Nelson, Murdock and Page. You’d met Foggy before, spent more than enough time with him and Karen back in the days where you and she worked more parallel than you did now. Hours of drinking and laughing and crying, they were great people, ones you cherished even from your distanced version of friendship. To be honest you were jealous of the bond they had, you weren’t always good at friendships or making connections, not long term ones. Sure you had tons of acquaintances, people who knew you and you knew but they almost never went further than surface deep. Karen had probably been the first person you’d officially called a friend in years, Foggy close behind.

You heard them before you saw them, Foggy’s boisterous laugh carrying into the party. “Come on, it won’t be that bad. Who knows maybe there will be someone who’s not an annoying prick.”

“Yeah, well I really doubt that Fog,” his voice was low, almost melodic in the way it washed over you. They finally stepped into the room, all huddled together and you froze.

Matt Murdock.

He wore the sleek black tux like he was born to, the sharp lines of the suit contrasting against the delicate build of his cheekbones. Small red sunglasses sat atop the bridge of his nose, and you studied his every feature. Watched the way his hands shifted and moved, holding his cane out in front of him to tap against the marbled floors. He was surrounded on either side by his friends, Foggy wearing a brown suit, one of the only expensive ones he kept after quitting Hogarth, Chao, and Benowitz. He had been weirdly fond of that specific one, though he refused to admit why, that it had been the suit he wore when he found out Matt was still alive. After that he couldn’t bear to be rid of it, selling all the rest in order to help fund the rebuild of their practice.

Karen’s eyes skimmed the room searching for yours, the long dark blue of her own dress accenting the slight red in her hair. When she picked you out, a small spread across her face and you saw her lean behind Matt to knock her hand into Foggy’s arm and once more you were reminded of what this was.

A set-up.

[hyunsuks-beanie]

At The Studio

Bang Chan x reader; strongly suggestive; heavy make out

A/N And I'm back in Chan's lane (not that I ever left since he's my bias), and I'm having some not-so-innocent thoughts about him right now. So here's a short scenario to satisfy my (and your) needs

"Aaand...I'm done for the day," Chan says as he shuts his laptop and stretches his arms, before giving you a soft smile. You hum in response without looking up from your phone, making him sigh. When you still don't notice him, he pouts and snatches his phone away from you.

"Hey! Give that back!," you say from your position on his lap, where you have been sitting for the past hour and a half. "No can do, because if I give it to you, then you'll ignore me again." He raises his hand up to keep the phone out of your reach, and when you try to reach out to grab it, he takes hold of your waist with his free hand, before chucking your phone onto the couch. Sighing, you settle back down, and it's now your turn to pout. "You didn't give me any attention for so long, and you get mad when I don't look at you for one minute? Unfair," you stick your tongue out to him, before trying to squirm out of his grip in an attempt to stand up.

Chan isn't having your antics though, and as soon as you manage to get up, he pulls you back down, throwing you flush against his chest, with your face close to his. "Hi," you breathe nervously, not sure where this is going. He moves his head to whisper in your ear. "Hey love," he says, before biting softly on your earlobe. This causes you to jump slightly, making him smirk as he moves his lips onto your neck. You throw your head back in pleasure, giving him the perfect angle to start sucking on your throat, leaving a hickey there, and causing you to moan.

Suddenly, you take hold of his chin and pull his face up, while saying, "Channie, make out with me." "As you say, my love," he replies with a smirk, before smashing his lips onto yours. The kiss is sweet yet powerful, slow yet frantic. His hands travel underneath your T-shirt, rubbing up your sides before coming to rest near your waist. Your hands, meanwhile, tangle themselves up in his curls, as you gently pull on them while grinding on his lap, making him groan. You take the chance to shove your tongue into his mouth, feeling all the places you know he loves to have you touch.

He suddenly bites your tongue, making you gasp in response. It's now his turn to explore your mouth with his tongue. You pulls back after a minute, only to grab him by the chin again. "Tongue," you say, making him stick his tongue out for you to suck on, as you continue to grind on him. He pulls at your hair, bringing your face up again, and once again kissing you with full force.

After what seems like forever, you two break away, looking like a total mess with your blown out eyes, swollen lips, and messy hair. "Babe, I love how you look right now, but I think you'll look better with that shirt off," Chan mutters, before adding, "I don't think I can wait till we get home, soooo...." By the time he's done, you've already locked the door, before pulling him onto the floor with you for what's to come.

[a-glimpse-of-fantasy]

DUSKWOOD THE HEIST - CHAPTER 29

English is not my first language, so please spare me for grammar mistakes. 🙏

I'm not very confidant about this chapter tbh. My head kinda keeps being numb & empty 😣

The Heist Master list

Previous chapter

Chapter 29

"We could get the flight list with your name on it and showing you board it and then sneak you off,"

But it's trickier than it seems to pretend to be dead. It’s almost impossible; especially in this era. Simply sneaking Mark out of the plane would not satisfy anyone’s doubts. Simply blowing off his private plane won’t get anything done. I gulp, unable to let out the seemingly possible next option.

Breaking the heavy silence, something completely unexpected escapes from MC’s lips. Never in a million years did I imagine, my little genius could utter such words.

“I guess we have no choice but to use a dummy instead of you, no matter how I imagine,” MC says, thoughtfully tapping her chin with her index finger.

Did I get that right? Did she mean we should kill someone else in Mark’s place?

I feel like I’m slowly turning her into a monster…a monster akin to me.

Mark draws a devilish smirk at her words. Aha! You’ve got a nice catch there, Jake! His face seems to say.

If only I could wipe away the existence of this guy…

In another minute, MC puts her hand on my thigh, “By the way, wouldn’t they be suspicious if we stay here for too long?” Then she turns to Mark, then shrugging her arms, “Surely they’d think we got caught or switched sides.”

Right. The most important thing right now is to get out of this place first.

Whether we’re working with you or the FBI…let’s see after that, you bastard.

Soon, Mark nodded along. “That’s true indeed. I see that you need to sneak out of here first.” He stood up, “Still, we need to discuss our next steps before you do.”

“Right.”

***

Jake and Mark continued the discussion (Somehow that bastard, Mark didn’t want me joining in. Is that gender discrimination?) while I… I kept contemplating whether I should tell the truth. Still, I can’t imagine how Jake would react to it.

Then we were both sneaked into a lorry full of…well, onions. Is this that bastard’s way of bullying us? It stinks! Where the hell did these freaking onions come from even?!

And now, here we are. On a country road, a dense forest on either side. (We were dumped here) For god’s sake, it will take months to find our bodies even if that Mark bastard shoots us and shove our bodies into the woods.

Is it my imagination? Jake seems a little…no okay, VERY angry. He already contacted Kyle and we are waiting for him, while we smell like… onions. We are sitting by the road, in silence.

I think now is the time.

“Um…Jake?” He turns to face me, and I gulp. Should I just say it’s nothing?

“Actually…there’s something I didn’t tell you…before going to the farm…” The latter of the words blurring, I avoid his gaze sneakily.

Jake frowns a little, “What is it MC?”

I clench my fists, “The thing is…your relationship to Mark..” Upon hearing those words, his face visibly contorted. I close my eyes tight, “I already knew about that.”

“What?”

I open my eyes slowly, to see Jake, whose face is full of confusion.

“You know…that day when we argued about me going to the farm and all? That night, while you were working on something I got Kyle to talk.”

Jake clenches his jaw, deeply sighing. I’m so sorry, Kyle! I didn’t mean to betray you either.

“Well, at first I just needed some assurance. I get it that you trust him and all, but…Kyle said his mother was killed and his sister was in a coma. I couldn’t leave out the possibility of Kyle being blackmailed using his sister. Because, if I was Mark, I’d definitely consider that option to corner you.”

He chuckles, taking my left hand into his. “I should’ve seen that coming.”

I nod, “So what happened was…”

-FLASHBACK-

“ I apologize if you’re offended but I need to know.”

“What is it?” Kyle looks up from the laptop screen, raising his brows.

“Before that, can we talk right now? I mean, it’s okay if you’re busy. We can talk later…possibly.” I fidget a little, honestly, I’m not sure if we’d get another chance before going to the farm. Jake is slumped with work, and won’t care to look for me right now.

This is the perfect chance.

Kyle shakes his head, “No. Now’s a good time.”

I nod, then proceed to sit on the chair in front of him. “I can’t be hundred percent sure, but I felt like you had something to tell me.” He widens his green eyes, then avoids mine.

“Is it…concerning your sister maybe?”

He looks up again, sighing. “Before that, let me ask you a question. What is our relationship to Master according to Jake?”

I raise an eyebrow, a little confused but answer anyway. “That you two are college friends and Master was your immediate supervisor at your first job?”

“Pfft. Seriously? Then how did we get involved in this mess?”

I feel it, I am getting annoyed. Still, I won’t get another chance for this. “That bastard was a vigilante or something and Jake was tricked into helping his illegal stuff. You refused but you suddenly warned him of the bastard then disappeared.” Forgive me for continuously calling someone’s child, a bastard. Sorry but not sorry, I simply have no heart to call that bastard ‘Master’. “Then he was framed by the bastard.”

He smirks, leaning over the chair. “Honestly tell me, you don’t buy that, right?” To which I just shrugged. Yeah. I don’t buy it. Why? Because Jake isn’t stupid enough not to see the consequences of his actions. For god, he wasn’t a f*cking six-year-old!

“Your hunch is somewhat right, I’d say. My sister was captured by Master. But, I’m not being blackmailed…At least for now. I guess he is assuming I’d lay low.”

I cross my arms across my chest, leaning over the backrest. “Then that means, by helping us, you’re putting her life in danger. Why are you doing this instead of licking his boots?”

Kyle sighed, deeply before closing his eyes for a moment. Then opening his eyes, he leaned forward. “You saw it coming too, right? Master always sees a few steps ahead. The truth is, tomorrow is a trap. A trap set for you and Jake.”

I bite my lower lip, I can taste the metallic taste of blood. “But there’s one thing we can be sure of. My involvement in this is something Master won’t see beforehand.”

“Let me guess, is your sister perhaps kept on the farm?”

He nodded, grinning. “Yes. The real goal for tomorrow is, you two saving your ass from his grasp while I, I’ll save my sister.”

“We are to buy time for you so you can save your sister...” While he nods, I frown. “And for what reason do we have to risk our lives for your sister?” Kyle sucked a sharp breath, “I swear miss Davis, If you help me with that, I’ll do anything. ANYTHING. Master won’t kill you two. No. If he wanted to, you’d be dead already. I suppose he has another motive.”

My heart races, “That means, we have no exit in this game other than going to the farm tomorrow. Because everything is a play, and that bastard is the screenwriter.”

“Yes. That’s why we have to take him by surprise with a plot twist.”

Ha ha ha! I see that weird twelve-headed creature has finally gone crazy! F*ck you!

“But why aren’t you telling this to Jake instead of me?”

He shrugs with a smug face, “He has gone crazy, that’s why.”

I scoff before staring into his eyes directly, “Then tell me this, then I’ll consider what to do next. What are you two’s REAL relationship to that bastard?”

-To be Continued.

[adhd-adept]

I have self diagnosed adhd and i was wondering if you could provide some advice regarding reading. I used to be able to just pick up a book and read when i was younger, but now that I'm older it's a bit difficult to just pick up a book and read for the sake of reading. I love reading, but i just can't seem to motivate myself to.

Any advice? I'd really love to get back into reading, but I'm trying to find a way to do it easier

Hello! I’m sorry this took me so long to answer, I’ve been mostly off Tumblr for a little while. I saw this some time ago at 3AM and thought “this deserves a more coherent response than I can give right now” and then forgot that this blog existed for several days.

That said, I absolutely have some advice for reading! I was a big reader as a kid, too, and I’ve recently had to re-discover reading after a long gap in any time spent sitting down with an honest-to-goodness book. There are a number of things you might consider!

DISTRACTIONS

First and foremost, recognize the reason it is difficult to read! For me, it is because reading isn’t the most interesting thing available. That doesn’t mean I don’t love reading! If I can manage to sit down and read a book, it is immensely satisfying - but it’s the satisfaction of the effort you put into something paying off. My favorite hobbies - drawing, writing, reading - are my favorite because of that sense of accomplishment that they give me. 

I love the feeling of holding a book and watching my bookmark move through the pages each time I set it down. However, it doesn’t give me the same instant gratification of reading wikipedia, or tvtropes, or scrolling Tumblr, or checking notifications on social media; even when I am unsatisfied, or even frustrated, with the internet, it can be very hard to put down. I know that people will tell you all the time “You need to put your phone down more!!” It gets old. But they have a point. What people don’t tell you is how to do that. 

For me, that tends to be about making it inconvenient for myself to get online, or do whatever is distracting me. This doesn’t necessarily mean making it completely unavailable. The distraction just needs to be less available than the task I want to do. I am the kind of person who gets online out of muscle memory, and then gets stuck there. Thus, many of my tricks rely on disrupting the muscle memory that lets you pick up distractions. I will put my laptop charger in another room, so that my screen time is limited to its battery life. I might tie a string around my laptop, or tape it closed, so when I go to open it I will be reminded “Oh yeah, I don’t want to do this right now.” I will occasionally rearrange the apps on my phone, so when I try to open Instagram and end up with the weather app instead, the thought of “wait, how did i get here” will snap me out of the thoughtless habits that led me to pick up my phone in the first place. I’ve even gone so far as to tape my phone to the ceiling. Whatever works.

If the weather permits, I might also walk a little ways down the block and find somewhere to sit and read. This can come with its own distractions, but it gets me away from my laptop, and I get a tiny bit more exercise and sunshine than I would have otherwise! This depends, of course, on whether you have transportation and whether you feel safe. But getting yourself out of the house can be a great way to get away from the things that would otherwise draw you away from reading. If you have a local cafe or library that permits you to sit and stay, those are also great options! I will bring my phone when I leave the house, but I might put it at the bottom of my bag, or put a bit of scotch tape over the power button, so that I have my phone in case of emergency but it’s just slightly inconvenient to get to without thinking about it.

It may not be the internet distracting you. But whatever the distraction is, it doesn’t need to be less compelling than reading. It just needs to be less readily available than your book is!

ENTHUSIASM

Another thing that prevents me from reading is that it often doesn’t have the same sense of urgency that other tasks might, whether that urgency is real or not. Give yourself a time limit! I may own books I haven’t read yet, but I will get to a book sooner if I have borrowed it from the library, because I know there is a deadline to return it! 

You can also get other people involved. If you have a friend who wants to read the same book, commit to a chapter or two a week and then call to discuss it. 

Or, if you have a friend who would be interested, and you are comfortable with your reading voice, you could read to someone! It might feel weird to offer, but you’d be surprised how many people really do enjoy being read to. If you both have time in your schedules, you could try to set up a regular call to get through a few chapters at a time. 

Generally, having a friend who likes the book is great for maintaining enthusiasm, even if they’re not reading it with you - I get to books faster if someone with similar taste says “This is one of my favorites! You would love it!” If you have a friend who has read the book you plan on reading, announce to them that you intend on reading it. Their enthusiasm might help you feel more compelled to read it, and there’s a good chance that if you don’t sit down and read it, they will remind you by asking “Have you read it yet? What do you think?” the next time you talk to them.

PREPARATION

Another great way to make reading easier is to set up a reading space beforehand. It’s one thing to pick up a book and say “I’ve been meaning to read this.” It’s another thing to put on some pajama pants, make a cup of tea, and curl a soft blanket around your shoulders before you settle down to read. For one thing, it’s just nice. But more importantly, it can function as a signal that tells your brain “it is Reading Time now. We are in the Reading Zone.”

Do you ever watch a TV show or listen to a podcast, and you let the theme song play on the first episode, and then skip it for the rest? Even if I’ve watched a show before, I will play the theme song on the first episode I watch that day. It’s the same principle - it serves as a transition, an intro that says “this is where I am now, and this is what I’m doing.” Give yourself an intro for reading! Have a certain spot that you like to sit when you read. Have a certain snack you eat beforehand.

I have all kinds of tasks with little “rituals” before them that help me focus on that task, or certain items that I interact with which I associate with it. I call them “declarations of intent,” and once I’ve made a declaration it’s easier to commit to it. Sometimes that means simply saying out loud, “I am going to do the laundry now.” Sometimes it means I wear a certain shirt if I’m planning to go for a walk that day, or drink from a certain mug at breakfast if I want to get some homework done. I have a specific hat that I put on when I want to write a certain character. Try to find something you can do to act as a cue that says “When I do this, then I will read a book.” Because of this, it can help to really lean into whatever the “aesthetic” of reading is, in your mind. Embrace a reading atmosphere!

It may also help to recognize that reading is something you can work your way up to! There is no shame in being out of practice with a hobby. I took my reading proficiency for granted for a long time because it was just a part of my life. It may help to think of reading as a skill! Start with something smaller and work your way up. Pick up a book of short stories or folktales before you tackle that six-book series you’ve heard good things about! Set achievable goals for yourself when you’re setting out. An early success can make a huge difference to morale, and it’s much better to start “too easy” and accomplish something than to jump in at the deep end and be frustrated by an early setback.

FORGIVENESS

On the topic of working your way up to things, I would like to say a word about mindset. It is easy to feel self-critical about things. Things that you think should come more easily to you. Things that you feel like you have no reason not to be able to do. One of the biggest things I’ve done for my ADHD is recognizing that there is always a reason why I behave a certain way. Accepting that allows me to actually address my struggles, rather than just feeling ashamed of them. I’ve had to accept that I won’t always do things that I set out to do the way I set out to do them.

I bring this up because not all of my advice here may work for you. In fact, some of it doesn’t work for me every time - a technique may work once, but I might fail to make a regular habit of it. I may make a regular habit of something, only to have it become less effective as the novelty of it, or my enthusiasm for it, wears off. I may eventually talk myself out of implementing an effective strategy because there is some part of it that I find unpleasant; or an intentional unpleasantness I once found motivating may eventually become intolerable.

That’s okay. I’m telling you now, it’s okay if that happens. It’s okay if the first method you try doesn’t work. Don’t set yourself up to feel frustrated. If you become frustrated, take a step back. If you borrow a library book and you still haven’t read it by the due date, just give it back. If you don’t actually enjoy the first book you pick up, put it down and try a different one. If you feel badly about not reading something your friend wants you to read, be honest and tell them you have a hard time sitting down, and that you don’t want to disappoint them if they keep asking, but that you will let them know once you have started it!

It can be easy to convince myself that feeling badly about something means it’s important to me, and that maybe if I feel bad about not doing something, it  motivate me to do it. There is a balance between making commitments, and not committing to anything that is just going to distress me. Sometimes there is a benefit to a sense of pressure, but I have to recognize when the pressure I create turns into frustration. That’s a fine line to walk! For all I speak of inconveniencing yourself, or holding yourself accountable, your strategies should ultimately feel satisfying, and show results fairly quickly! You may not see immediate results, but if it has been several days and your strategy isn’t working out, change tactics! And the moment you feel apologetic or ashamed about the thing you are trying to do, drop that strategy. Again, this can be easier said than done, but it is so worthwhile to learn how to allow yourself to “give up” on things that aren’t actually helping you, without feeling like you’re giving up entirely.

You want to get back into reading again because you want to enjoy reading again. If you set it up to feel like homework, or a chore, or an obligation, you may make it more difficult for yourself! Getting back into reading is about focusing on what you love about reading.

And hey, I’m always happy to help! I do only check Tumblr every couple weeks right now, but I’ll do what I can to be supportive. If you’ve tried these suggestions and they don’t work out, no worries! Everyone is different, and it’s no insult to me if things that work for me don’t work for you. But feel free to reach out again, let me know anything you have learned about how you function best in the meantime, and we can reevaluate your strategies!

I hope that helps! Happy reading!

[theroundbartable]

I honestly have no idea how you write so many fanfics and how they're all so good I'm so impressed by you

I have actually.... Kinda stopped posting for a while.... But like.... Thank you (灬º‿º灬)♡

(i'm working on multiple stories actually. All which I'm not satisfied with.... Or done with. I'm not used to having so many WiPs. Believe it or not.

The one i'm bsing on right now has 60 pages and I am Not even close to being done. )

I guess the main reason I have so many ideas, is because BBC Merlin has like a dozen plot holes per episode, potential for many concepts and a background history of hundreds of books that I can mix like Tarot cards.

For how I get to write so many.... i simply don't have a life? XD okay, fine. I have a job, which takes about 10 hours +/-1 of my day, depending on how busy we are.

And I also have friends and housework duties. But I usually meet those on weekends.

Which leaves me with round about 4-5 hours a day to work on my projects. Be it art or stories depends on how my brain acts that particular day. I tend to use that time as much as possible.

During my time at work (I'm working post press at a print factory), I have lots of time to let my mind run wild. It's an unconscious thing I do, so I don't get wrapped up in anxiety (there are days when this method does not work.) This continues when I drive home, but this time with musical background, which also influences my mood and ideas.

I spend my break time reading fanfic, btw. Like a responsible adult :)

I often like to combined overused tropes. The more I use, the more complex and original the story. (there is nothing wrong with a flower shop au. But combine this with rivals to lovers with a biker gang au, add a little shapeshifting into animals into the mix and grand a cat the ability to see the future and bam, unique story created. Not that I ever do it on purpose. I usually search for a specific au and then it's not specific enough to satisfy all the tropes i wanna see in that moment XD)

When I get home, I usually try to get those ideas out of my head, so I can focus on other things. Like new shows I wanna watch or whatever.

I get really lost in my writing sometimes. But most of the time I only get a page or two done. Sometimes more, sometimes less. But it's practically every day, so it rounds up. Not to mention i always reread the last paragraph to remember where i am and also to edit a few things in.

I can never switch of my mind. But writing get's order into the chaos that is my head space.

When my head is empty and without any inspiration, I usually watch a movie, but I can never really concentrate on that, so I have to draw and often miss important plot points.

I'm not very happy with my writing style at the moment, but that isn't going to stop me from writing. Neither is the fact that while concepts come to me easy, art does not, is stopping me from drawing.

Things I want to show are hard for me to do. Only things I want to tell. I can combine that, somehow. But it's difficult.

I don't write and draw everyday, btw. Sometimes i'm just not in the mood and that's okay. I do this for fun. If it's not fun, then i won't force myself to continue. But i have the habit of at least reading through a few lines. Which I will then correct. Which leads me to actually starting to write again.

I usually get restless after about 4-5 days of not doing anything (like when i'm at a friends house without my laptop), then i have to do something or i get really annoying.

With myself, mostly.

I wouldn't call that impressive. But I don't wanna reject your compliment, so :3 thank you ^^

I just really like the show. My mind needs something to focus on and Merlin is one of those shows, where the most toxic fans are long gone and I don't have to fear uploading any fics.

It's.... Convenient, I'd say :) and exhausting :D

[rims-things]

Fanfiction - One Shot

Fanfiction

Show : Doom at your Service

Myul Mang / Kim Saram x Dong Kyung

Setup : Kim Saram falls sick for the first time in his life. Thankfully Dong Kyung is there to take care of him

Concept suggested by : @dizistyles ❤

"Hello? You there ? "

Dong Kyung walked across her room , speaking into her phone and waiting for him to reply. It was already late at night and ever since he turned into a human, he would often fall asleep without warning.

She chuckled, imagining how sweetly he might be cuddled up in the bed.

"You're asleep. Good night Kim Saram.." she said before cutting the call.

Dong Kyung walked back to her laptop to note down whatever information she had just taken down for her novel.

She woke up the next day , expecting to get a call from him. She impatiently kept checking her phone , but all in vain. There was absolutely no news of him.

But he had promised to drop me to work today - She wondered.

When it was about time he should have come to pick her up, she instantly felt anxious.

Did he disappear? Was it a dream? Was it all a dream?

She panicked and quickly dialed his phone number with shivering hands.

Pick up! Please.. please pick up! - She begged.

.

.

"Hello?" His voice was weak but felt like a blessing to her ears.

She took a sigh of relief.

"Are you okay?? Why didn't you come ?" She asked trying to calm herself down.

He suddenly realized that he had been asleep all this while and it was late already.

"I... I'm.." he couldn't speak properly.

"Saram? .. are you okay ?" She started getting worried.

He slowly sat up on his bed and squeezed his eyes.

"I don't feel good." He said in a low voice.

That was enough for Dong Kyung to immediately pick up her bag and leave for his house. Not that she was just worried what might be wrong, but she was always anxious about his disappearance.

Saram held his head in his palms and groaned in pain.

"Ahhhh! Why does it feel so bad " he said to himself.

Ofcourse he was a doctor, and he knew everything about the human body. But only in theory.

He kept whining about the situation when Dong Kyung crashed into his room. His face lit up instantly.

"Saram.. are you okay ??" She said, running towards him.

"Ya.. i am fine.. i think i have what you call a... 'headache' " he said with a forced smile, he felt terrible from inside.

Dong Kyung could see the bizarre look on his face and immediately understood that he was not well.

"Hey! Don't lie to me.." she said, sitting next to him and caressing his cheek with her tiny fingers.

She jumped in horror. His skin was burning with fever.

"YA! Saram! You are burning!" She shouted feeling panicked.

He looked at her with a confused and dull look. He felt strange, sleepy, heavy on the head and weak.

"Burning ? " He said touching his face. "Aah.. so I have a 'fever' ?" He asked sounding curious.

Dong Kyung rolled her eyes and pressed her foot hard on the floor.

"How can you not know that you have a fever, when you are a doctor by profession?" She taunted.

"I've seen sick people but i haven't fallen sick myself.. how would I know how it feels ?" He said with a straight face as if it was so obvious.

Dong Kyong shook her head and stood up from the bed to leave.

He immediately held her hand back.

"Where are you going? Don't leave me... I'm sick ." He pleaded like a child.

Sometimes he was such a baby and she couldn't help but love him even more. She smiled at him warmly.

"I'm going to get you a medicine" she informed.

"Oh okay.." he said , releasing her hand immediately.

She chuckled at his tantrums and turned around to leave but he called out to her again.

"Dong Kyung..i also feel.. numb .. as if I have no energy.. as if I can't stand ? Or walk? Is that what you call 'weakness' ?" He asked, inquisitively.

She turned towards him and sighed.

"Yes... you're feeling weak because you are sick. You have a headache, you will feel dizzy, sleepy and lazy"

"Woah! You know a lot about being sick." He exclaimed.

Dong Kyung rolled her eyes and sighed helplessly. He was impossible

"I'll be right back" she said before walking out.

By the time she returned, he had covered himself with a blanket and fallen asleep.

She quietly kept the medicine and a glass of water next to him on the table. She sat beside him and caressed his temple.

"You look so cute when you are asleep" she said softly.

"I know " he replied, with his eyes closed.

She frowned and hit him on the forehead.

"Kim Saram! Don't put on an act, get up and take your medicine if you are awake. "

He smiled and held her hand, slowly sitting up.

"But I haven't eaten anything.."

"That's why I made you something. Eat it. Have medicine and take rest."

"Ah.." he looked at the breakfast kept next to him. ".. that is what my wife would do...wait ...is that a proposal? I say Yes .. lets get married today?" He exclaimed.

She pushed him back with a shy smile.

"Just do what I said"

He frowned at her and unwillingly went ahead to have his breakfast, but it felt terrible to sit and eat. He felt dizzy and lethargic.

"Ah.. i don't want to eat Dong Kyung.. can't i just sleep?? This feels so terrible.." he complained .

She immediately took the plate in her hand and started feeding him herself.

He smirked and happily took a bite without question. Was there any point saying No to her?

"If you don't eat, how will you get better? Don't you know .. Doctor??" She mocked.

He chuckled and continued to take bites, without moving his eyes away from her face. He couldn't thank the Goddess enough for letting him see her again.

After she was done, she handed over a tablet and a glass of water to him.

"Have this. I'll be back " she said before leaving with the plates.

By the time she returned, she had expected him to be done with the medicine, but she found him sitting and staring at the tablet instead.

"What ? " She asked.

He looked up at her with an innocent smile.

"I haven't taken a tablet ever before... does it pain?" He asked.

Dong Kyung chuckled.

"Haven't you seen your patients take it? Do they cry?"

"No"

"Then just swallow it with water. It doesn't hurt" she said, smiling at him.

"What if it gets stuck in my throat? Will I die ?"

"It won't. Just gulp it down."

"Okay.." he nodded and took the tablet as if it was the biggest stunt of his whole life.

"Goshh! How could you be a doctor.?" She wondered.

"Aaachooo" he suddenly sneezed and felt shocked. " What was that " he said to himself.

"Aaa.. I see.. you got wet in the rain last night didn't you? Now you're sneezing." Dong Kyung explained.

"Woah! It felt weird.. it was so sudden.. is that how you feel when u sneeze ??" He asked.

Dong Kyung laughed seeing him experience all such things for the first time in his life. She somehow felt satisfied that he was totally a human now.

She carefully made him lie down on the bed and sat next to him with a piece of cloth and bowl of water.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"It will help to get your fever down quicker" she said.

"I know that. But you don't have to do it  .. I am fine. Aachooo! ......Yaaa! ....That feels bad" he said.

She giggled and continued to wet the cloth and put it on his head until his fever was down. He kept looking at the calmness on her face and felt his pain fade away.

Hardly did he know when he dozed off.

Dong Kyung kept looking at his innocent face and recalled how he used to be few months ago. How he was simply existing, neither alive nor dead. But today he was living and experiencing everything he had ever wanted.

She quietly walked to the other side of his bed and laid down next to him, running her fingers through his soft hair.

"I love you so much..." she whispered and shut her eyes, feeling his cheeks against her palm.

He felt better when he opened his eyes after having a good rest. He still felt a bit weak but mostly fine. He tried to move his head when he realized that someone was sleeping cuddled up in his arms.

He could feel her silky hair touching his chin when he looked down. She was sleeping peacefully against his chest and in his embrace. He couldn't help but smile and blush.

"You're so small.." he chuckled, and caressed her head.

She moved her head up slowly and spoke with her eyes half open.

"Are you feeling better ?"

"Yes ...with you in my arms, I feel way better " he said.

She felt shy and immediately tried to get herself out if his grip but he held her back.

"Don't go..I'm sick.." he said, but his look was rather intense than mischievous.

She felt a familiar tension in the air with the fire he had in his eyes and unknowingly approached his lips. Without wasting a second, he kissed her back gently.

She wrapped her arms tighter around him and he brushed his fingers on her cheeks. They kissed for a while and parted.

Dong Kyung was left flustered, while Saram smiled satisfactorily. He turned around and picked up the tablets kept next to his bed.

Handing over the tablets to her he spoke.

"Now you'll need this too ..." he chuckled.

"Just shut up. Creep! Why did you kiss me ?" She complained.

"I kissed you?? You approached first..."

"No..what do you mean ..?"

Their kisses might last for seconds, but their bickering knows no end.

A/N : That's all folks. I hope I did not bore you ☹ Sorry if there were silly mistakes 🥲 Didn't proof read it 😶 I wanted to write more but my office people are cruel 💔💔 I wish I could make it better, but that all I could do this time 😅 Thanks @dizistyles for the suggestion, I loved writing this. 💙