#i love this bless you

[lightningandfireinmybones]

Fake Tinder AU Aemond, who's been in love with Valaena for years decides to bite the bullet and download a dating app. Unwilling to continue to pine for her and taking his brothers sorta gross advice to "get his dick wet". Hoping to find someone who fills the Valaena sized hole even a little, even if it's just casual, just sex, even if he hates himself a little for it. Valaena who's had a crush on Aemond she refuses to think about, always dating people who are the furthest from him as possible. Dark curly hair, rough around the edges, people joke she has the same taste as her mother. Which would be funny if it weren't for the fact that she's also sleeping with the next best thing since she's in love with her silver haired uncle. And normally she wouldn't match with someone who's pictures are cropped, where she can see a sliver of platinum blonde and no face. But it makes her think of Aemond, who she knows would never slum on an app. Aemond matches back, her pictures are cropped like his but the texture of the curls, the hue of her hair is all what he's looking for, whether it's bleach and a curling iron he doesn't care. He could pretend. And the flirting is great, the sexting is great, he has to convince himself that bits and pieces of her picture draped in a towel are coincidences. She ignores his clipped and proper way of typing, so similar to Aemonds, because he's describing all the things she's dreamt of Aemond saying. But neither of them can ignore when they show up at the same restaurant

Bestie you’ve stumbled upon one of my favorites!!! Unintentional (AND INTENTIONAL,,,valaena 100% would purposefully catfish aemond, knowing he would never make a move unless she forced him into it,,, i have this vision of blindfolded aemond with valaena riding him until he takes his blindfold off right as she’s about to come and immediately takes control) catfishing/fake tindering!!

Aemond has been pining after valaena for years, but would never make a move (maybe lets say the whole uncle thing isn’t so allowed),,, and even aegon can tell he’s in unrequited (lol) love, so he recommends just hopping on an app and letting his muscles do the talking, what aemond really needs is a good fucking, needs to get his dick wet to forget whoever it is that has him so turned around,,, so he does it, he pulls the trigger and makes a dating profile that is VERY obviously just for hookups (he may be entertaining the thought of having casual sex but dating anyone but her is out of the question),,, it’s all strategic angles of muscles and a sharp jaw and long silver hair 

And then there’s valaena,,,in love (she thinks it’s just lust) with aemond since she was like 14,,, has been trying to avoid those feelings in a veritable parade of men (and women) who look nothing like aemond, dark curly haired boys who are funny and rough, the latest of which is playboy dalton greyjoy,,, but on her secret tinder, the one that just has flashes of collarbone and curly silver hair and the corner of a purple eye and very tasteful shot of her from the back in a skimpy swimsuit, she can’t help but swipe on the men that remind her of aemond

They match with each other, moments of weakness and delusion at those familiar features that spark something within them, but are just ambiguous enough to let them have the benefit of the doubt,,, finally they can both pretend that they’re talking to who they want to

It isn’t immediately sexual, despite the way both their profiles are set up, both of them indulging in the fantasy,,, but once it does turn sexual, there’s no going back

The two are having phone sex and sexting like crazy, ducking into bathrooms

Ignoring the flashes of scars is becoming harder and harder, so they shouldn’t really be surprised when they agree to meet for the first time and run into each other at the door to the restaurant

[seagreenlaurin]

🤍❤️

[huachengsromcom]

People call Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF a slow burn but Hua Cheng is literally courting Xie Lian like they are DATING. Slow burn who??? They’re sleeping next to each other on straw mats and Xie Lian’s offering to cook him dinner and they’re bantering across THE HOME THEY SHARE like a bunch of desperate hussys

San Lang LEAVES XL WITH A KEEPSAKE OF THEIR TIME TOGETHER SLOW BURN WHOMST

They have A DATE in HC’s armoury where they HOLD HANDS and XL pets San Lang’s quivering sword I-

Hua Cheng basically throws himself at this man he’s like you want a sword?? All of them ?? You want ALL THE SWORDS?? Fuck it take the whole room THE WHOLE ROOM JUST COME VISIT I WILL CLEAN THEM FOR YOU

Like he isn’t the king of a whole realm with shit to do

And this is just the first half of the first book—again I ask the world SLOW BURN WHOMST

[biboomerangboi]

Hua Cheng essentially cockblocking himself for possibly all of eternity will literally never not be the funniest thing MXTX ever wrote.

Xie Lian was pretty much completely in love with him the second he saw those lanterns (and completely oblivious about it) and then we get the wonderful first kiss underwater moment and Xie Lian is basically drawing hearts around Hua Cheng every time he sees him. While like quietly dying cause he literally has no idea what to do with it. Like at this point he doesn’t even really understand that he is head over heels totally gone for this man.

Until Hua Cheng is like I have a beloved I just haven’t won them over yet. Which he thinks is perfectly reasonable because his self esteem is the worst and he doesn’t understand how he could have won Xie Lian over yet. (He’s only on step 22 of his Marrying Dianxia 3000 step Master Plan ((that he debates throwing out on a regular basis because he doesn’t deserve to even dream about wanting Xie Lian)). So course he’s like yeah I have this wonderful noble beautiful beloved I just haven’t won them over yet wink wink nudge nudge.

But Xie Lian is like oh of course obviously I don’t deserve nice things and fuck I actually wanted him so badly I’m actually in love with him and now I will resign myself to never being happy for his sake. (Their combined self esteem is truly a so low it’s a hole in the ground which is hilarious because they think the other person is to good for them and unattainable forever because they literally have the same neurosis.) So he starts boxing up his feelings forever constantly wanting Hua Cheng and feeling guilty about it and literally dying inside because he wants Hua Cheng like he’s never wanted anyone.

Like essentially books 3 and 5 only happen because Hua Cheng has now cursed them both by saying he has a beloved because Xie Lian believes he isn’t wanted and therefore any nice thing Hua Cheng does is just him being nice and not Hua Cheng pulling out steps 23-34 of his plan thinking he still hasn’t won Xie Lian over. (He has he so has but he shot himself in the foot so badly it’s painful to read).

Like thank the Gods Hua Cheng is so unhinged and created the cave of 10000 Gods cause Xie Lian would literally be at his own wedding to Hua Cheng still convinced he wanted someone else and this was in fact a thing they were doing to solve a case together otherwise.

Like he needed something that unhinged to put 2 and 2 together otherwise he never would have caught on he’s Hua Cheng’s beloved. Meanwhile Hua cheng is like 🥺 he’s going to think I’m a weirdo now and I’m only on step 50 of the plan 🥺 like the two of them wouldn’t have been fucking nasty 2 books ago if he just kept his mouth shut and didn’t cockblock himself so violently.

[myrkulitescourge]

the way that one line from the new epilogue in an astarion romance is going to HAUNT me

just. what a profoundly intense thing to confess to someone.

like, just these six months of newfound happiness with you exerts a force on his heart equal and in direct opposition to two centuries of endless torment, the gnawing hunger and exploitation. this flashbulb-bright fraction of his long life holds the same gravity to him as years upon years of darkness and suffering.

in all likelihood, he hasn’t even known his lover for as long as his worst memory lasted, that year sealed away to go mad from starvation and sensory deprivation, yet he still tells them this brief time has been so fundamentally and powerfully important that the weight of even that unimaginable hell is vanishingly small compared to this present he has now and the future ahead of them both.

how am i supposed to act normal about this.

[syea-say]

The finale of a never-ending masquerade.

AQ 4.2 spoilers.

[egophiliac]

like mother, like son, but less wholesome this time?

(I couldn't decide whether or not to put them together, so have them in all the different ways!)

[eyeseechan]

release that girl

[thatmooncake]

Someone is here for another visit! 🎉

It’s time for Moon crimes (and their consequences)

(Aftermath close ups under the cut)

[lazycranberrydoodles]

they are so in love and disgusting and also sarcastic bitches. follow for more / prev comic / next comic

[mimimar]

a heart that yearns is always young ♡

[wannabe-f-f-friends]

My issue today is how Hua Cheng went from painting huge gorgeous murals of Taizi Dianxia with a tiny little gremlin Hong in the corner, to sculpting one Hua Cheng to match each Xie Lian, like an acknowledgement that his presence is something Xie Lian has always needed. And not even just Crimson Rain at his best, but all Hua Chengs. Even little Hong'er offering a flower. He was needed at every stage of their lives. He always had value.

[hualianschild]

[unpersoniverse]

I saw a tweet that said Korra's only a softie around Asami and one thing led to another...

[meru90]

Family Portrait

[raggedy-spaceman]