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avatarmerida · 11 months

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Buckle up y’all, this took me through a loop. This is based on an idea that @rebeccaartsy had awhile ago about Hunter being in the show earlier and it inspired this and it kinda just went… woah. So lemme know if it’s confusing at all there’s just a *smidge* of angst but I really like it okay bye

UPDATE: mini sequel here

———

“Gus, listen,” said Hunter, as he walked through the open door of the Owl House. “Obviously, there is classified information that I can’t divulge but upon consideration I am willing to grant you an interview for your class. The Emperor’s Coven values education, and so I could definitely offer you information regarding our selection process which I’m sure your teachers will find impressive and- why is Willow upside down?”

“Oh, Amity set Willow’s mind on fire and now she’s losing all her memories,” said Luz with a nervous chuckle as both girls tried to keep her from falling off the couch. “But uh, whaaat’s up with you?”

“What?” He said running over to her side and helping her sit correctly on the couch and immediately began checking her vitals. “Is she okay?”

“Don’t worry blondie, we’re gonna get these knuckleheads in there to set things right,” said Eda from behind them. “Or at least less wrong.”

“You’re gonna entrust Willow’s mind in the hands of… them?” Said Hunter in disdain as he glared at Luz and Amity who honestly couldn’t argue with him. Willow was limpm in his arms, her eyes unable to focus. “They were the ones who put her in this situation in the first place! Not to mention, this location isn’t zoned for a spell of that caliber and as a member of the Emperor’s Coven I could-.”

“Listen, do you want it done soon or do you want it done legally?” Asked Eda. “Cause by the time we get the permits to do it your way Goldie, there won’t be any of Willow’s memories left to save.”

“Very well then,” said Hunter, pretending as though it was a hard decision. “I’ll allow it. Just… be careful with her.”

“Alright then,” said Eda. “Lemme whip up something to put her to sleep. She’s not gonna wanna be awake for this.”

“Oh look, the prince is here,” giggled Willow, leaning on Hunter’s shoulder for support as she noticed his presence for the first time. “Helloooo, your highness.”

“Uh, hi,” he said, not expecting her to be this close to him but knowing that pouting distance between them would cause her to fall. “A-re you oka-.”

“Shhh,” she said, putting her finger to his lips, whispering as though it was the most serious thing on earth. “There’s something I need to tell you.”

“What?” he said despite his lips being smushed, hanging on to her words with concern.

She took a deep breath. “You have beautiful eyes.” She whispered with intensity.

His face turned bright crimson as he tried to laugh, assuming it must be a joke of some sort. But Willow’s voice didn’t carry the disdain most jokes at Hunter’s expense carried. She wasn’t in her right mind, but maybe that didn’t mean she wasn’t serious.

“Oh uh… thank you?” He said, clearing his throat. “So, uh, s-so do you?”

“Hmmm,” she giggled then hiccuped, squinting at him and then leaning in closer as though she couldn’t quite see something. “Do they make you wear that mask because you're so handsome all the time?”

“What?”

To the side, Luz and Amity were trying in vain not to giggle. Hunter shot them another glare, knowing this was no time for laughter let alone from them.

“How could you let this happen?” he asked them through clenched teeth and they quickly felt guilty. Even though Eda had a solution, this was serious. As Hunter’s stern eyes reminded them that this was their doing, Willow’s finger slowly made its way to trap Hunter’s forelock, twirling it around her finger.

“Awwwh, look at the widdle worm,” she whispered, enchanted by its delicate spring. Hunter couldn’t help but smile.

“Oh suuuure when she calls it a worm it's cute but when I do it you threaten to banish me!” said Hooty with disdain.

“Well that’s because you tried to eat it!” said Hunter as Willow continued to coo at his hair. She did this often, usually when he was upset or grumpy she’d flick it or pull it and for some reason it calmed him down. Her teasing wasn’t cruel or spiteful, it was silly and sweet. Now, she was beyond silly but playing with his hair seemed to distrust her from wandering away so Hunter said nothing of it.

“Woooormy wormy worm,” Willow sang to herself as Hunter steadied her by her shoulders and subtly checked her for any signs of external injury. But it appeared the only damage was her mind, for now at least. He would find time to be furious with Blight and the human later, but now his concern outweighed any other emotion he could hope to have now.

Soon Willow erupted into a sea of giggles as she remembered her worm friend was attached to a person. “Well helloooo again, princey” she said, her voice low and playful, trying to wiggle her eyebrows. “You come here often?”

“Uh… yeah?”

“Hmmm exactly how many worms are you hiding?” she whispered as though she was being spied on. “Are you stealing them from my garden?”

“Uh, I don’t know how to answer that, it’s not-.”

“Nap time!” Said Eda, zapping something in their direction and Willow instantly fell asleep, leaning forward onto Hunter’s shoulder. He was unprepared to say the least, but tentatively put an arm around her to keep her upright, his eyes wide as his movements were careful.

“Alright coven boy, you keep Princess Planter comfy while I tell these two how to keep things from getting worse,” instructed Eda, pointing to Luz and Amity.

“Yeah sure okay,” replied Hunter, barely listening. Eda was telling Luz and Amity something but all Hunter could hear was the gentle sound of Willow snoring, her breathing slow and deep and peaceful. He has never been so close to her, he could see every delicate freckle that decorated her face. Her glasses were askew so he carefully removed them, because it just seemed like the thing to do. Her mind was on fire, the least he could do was make her more comfortable.

—

After Amity and Luz had been on their mission for a while, Hunter did not leave Willow’s side as he watched her eyes shift behind her eyelids as she… dreamed? Would she think this was all a dream? She would mumble things occasionally, hopefully that meant something good? She just looked so-

“Hey Hunter, you want in on this?” Asked Gus.

“Huh?” He looked up quickly as though he was being accused of something. He hadn’t been listening. Hadn’t he been tasked with monitoring her? Is that what Eda said or had he just done it naturally? “Sorry, what?”

“King and Eda are competing to be the subject of my interview,” repeated Gus. “You still want in?”

Hunter had forgotten all about being the subject of Gus’ report as he became engrossed in watching Willow sleep. Was that creepy? He didn’t mean it to be. He just felt… protective. He felt responsible. He could never fall asleep like this with anyone unless he trusted them completely. He had never fallen asleep around anyone. And he knew Willow did not have a choice in the matter but he wanted to be worthy of her trust anyway.

“Uh, no thanks maybe next time,” he said, uncharacteristically soft. “Someone should keep an eye on Willow.”

“Eh, she’s not going anywhere goldie,” said Eda as a twinkle entered her eye. “Buuuut when she does wake up, she’s probably gonna be hungry. Having the essence of your inner being threatened really takes alot out of you.”

“Oh yeah, sure,” said Hunter, looking at her in wonder. She seemed to be doing fine, but no doubt there would be brutal side effects. “Should I-.”

“Snacks! Snacks! Snacks!” chanted King.

“Oh yeah, uh I guess I could… do that,” he said softly. He wasn’t sure why he was being quiet, no one else was. But his usual tone didn’t seem fitting now. Normally, he would not take orders (or even suggestions) from civilians but if it was for Willow then it didn’t feel like succumbing to rank. It felt like helping. It felt purposeful. He carefully stood up, mourning the loss of warmth for only a moment, and placed Willow comfortably on the couch carefully guiding her head to a throw pillow. As he made his way to the kitchen, his eyes were glued to her until it was impossible to continue. Eda,King, and Gus were too occupied in their debate to notice.

Willow was going to be fine, she had to be. Everyone would be acting more worried if she wasn’t, right? She had always been strong and capable, he knew her mind couldn’t be much different. He turned his focus from concern into purpose. He wouldn’t admit it to the others, but he was thankful for the distraction. He felt foolish just sitting there not being able to do anything for her. He had never actually made something before, but how hard could it be? He had studied under the head of the Potions coven, how different was baking from that?

As he looked through Eda’s cupboards, Willow’s words echoed in his ears. Well, not all of them. There was one in particular, occupied by the way the ends of her mouth turned up as she said it that made his stomach flip.

Handsome.

No one had ever called him that before, not even ironically. Did she really think that? Why did he care so much if she did? Why, suddenly, did he want so much for her to?

Was it really suddenly though?

Ugh! Why hadn’t he said something cooler? He wasn’t sure she’d even remember saying it, but if she did he didn’t want his surprised reaction to prevent her from possibly repeating herself! He had never had issue thinking of clever retorts (though, to be fair he did do a fair deal of practicing in his bedroom mirror each night) and they often fell into a comfortable conversation. But sometimes she would say something a certain way or look at him too long and it would throw him off. Not in a bad way, no nothing at all like that, just… unexpected. She laughed at the jokes people would roll their eyes at or ask him to continue where normally he was cut off and all the little things just kept adding and piling up until Hunter didn’t know how he was supposed to carry them. She was so many little things, like the way she tilted her head when she asked him a silly question or how her glasses would slide off her edge of her nose when she got excited or the way she would stand close to him and sometimes their hands would brush like she didn’t care if they-

Focus! He thought, taking ingredients from the cabinets. There wasn’t much and what there was seemed to have no organizational system but he could resolve that after he figured out what to whip up. Something simple, something to show Willow he wanted to help. He didn’t know her well enough to enter her mind with Luz and Amity, but secretly he hoped he was getting there.

Eventually, he managed to make something that resembled cookies, the smell filled the kitchen and it surprisingly wasn't an awful smell?. He remembered Willow mentioned once she was eager to get home as her father had made some and they were waiting for her. Truthfully, Hunter had never tasted a cookie but he had seen them when he walked by the bakery in town and knew the basics of their structure. Surely if he had taken a wrong turn the smell would reflect that, right? He imagined the look on Willow’s face when she saw his creation, and maybe even liked it. The flipped feeling returned to his stomach and spread through his whole chest like a wild fire when the potential look of delight on her face graced his mind.

In his efforts, he had made quite the mess. But he couldn’t help but feel pride as he quickly plated his creation, eager to return to Willow’s side. He didn’t think too much into this, he was always excited to see Willow. He tried not to think too much into that, chalking it up to the fact that she was interesting and a good listener and funny and smart and pretty and-

The point was she didn’t find him totally annoying, so why shouldn’t he enjoy her company?

And if she happened to think he was a little handsome then, well, that wasn’t the worst thing.

As he set the cookies to cool, he heard a sudden commotion from the next room. He quickly ran to see the cause, hoping it was a good sign. There was a bright flash and then he heard Luz and Amity. He stood back a moment, trying to deduce their tone before he heard Willow speak. Her voice was horse and soft, but he could tell she was back to normal. Good, he thought, feeling as though he could finally breathe again. She’s okay, she’s okay.

He went to greet her but before he could leave the kitchen, he was stopped by Luz. Before he could offer a snarky question as to what exactly she thought she was doing, she looked at him with wide, concerned eyes.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, furrowing his brow. He tried to look past her to see what was going on. “Is she okay? Did something happen to-?”

“Willow’s fine.” she assured him, putting her arm up to stop him. “There were just some… complications.”

“What complications? Was she hurt? Does she need-?”

“No no, nothing like that but um there were some memories… we couldn’t save,” said Luz carefully.

“Like what? Did she forget something for a test she has? Because I can always-.”

“No, no uh there were more… recent memories,” Luz tried to figure out the nicest way to say this. ”Hunter, I’m sorry but we were still figuring out how things worked and it all happened so fast but… Willow doesn’t remember you.”

“What?” He felt something shatter.

“I’m so sorry, but hey, it’s an easy fix! Right? We can just introduce you now!”

“Yeah, uh I guess…” he said, looking at his current state. He had thrown on an old apron and was covered in flour, his hair a mess. This night was already so chaotic, it hardly seemed like a time Willow would want to meet someone new. He didn’t know how Luz would even go about it.

When he and Willow had first met, Luz had already given her opinions to her friends when it came to the Golden Guard. She described him as pretentious and rude and socially awkward. But when she had stumbled upon Hunter hanging upside down by his ankles after taking a wrong turn and falling into a den of wild climbing hysteria vines, she had no idea who he was. He had been so grumpy and flustered and embarrassed but had he known exactly who had come to his rescue his gratitude would not have been so halfhearted.

She didn’t seem to be bothered by it, and she didn’t brag or showboat as she easily helped him down. She laughed, not to mock him but to try and lessen his embarrassment as though she could relate. It could happen to anyone, she had said as she helped remove the remaining vines from him. When I first started on the plant track I had my fair share of run-ins with these troublemakers, she said as she carefully untangled them. Hunter could tell she could do it easily with magic but she did it by hand so as to ensure he was not hurt. He was speechless as he watched her work, she was focused; she didn’t ridicule him or ask for anything in return or gripe about how he was making her late, she just helped him because doing so was just in her nature. When she finished, he managed to mumble something resembling a thank you before she kept running to her destination, unaware they were heading to the same place.

She didn’t ask for anything in return, not snails or a favor or did anything to use the moment as blackmail. She didn’t mention it in front of the others when they met again at the Owl House. From that moment on, she occupied a part of Hunter’s mind he didn’t know was available. Now he had a chance for her to see him exactly as he wanted to be seen from the beginning and it felt like a chance he needed to seize.

He had a second chance at a first impression.

His mind made up, he looked around for a way out before the human could return with Willow. Quickly, he climbed out the window and landed in a bush. He ducked beneath the window and pressed his back against the wall as he heard Willow and Luz enter the kitchen.

“Huh, where did he go?” he heard Luz wonder.

“Who was this again?” Willow asked, her voice still raspy as though she was utterly exhausted.

“Uh, it’s kinda hard to explain,” Luz admitted. “But, he’ll be around again. I know he really wants to meet you!”

“Okay,” said Willow, uncertain. “If you say so.”

He couldn't help but think about the chill that went up his spine when she looked into his eyes. He didn’t understand exactly what it was but he knew it wasn’t nothing. He wanted Willow to know a better version of him. He cared what she thought. When she met him this time, he wanted it to be a meeting worth remembering.

—

But the more time that passed, the more Hunter built it up in his mind.

He wanted to be charming and funny and brave and smart and cool and so many things he wasn't totally sure he had ever actually been, forget all at once. But there was so much to condired! The setting, the time of day, how her day had been, He didn;t want to be associated with a bad day and he wasn’t totally sure what preconceived notions she had about him. Luz and Gus had promised not to say anything about him to her, feeling guilty that she had lost a part of herself, but the Golden Guard was a public figure and he couldn’t control things she might overhear.

And then his uncle made him head of the Emperor's Coven, and he had less time to conduct his perfect meeting.

Then one day, Darius told him to collect new recruits for the Coven and Hunter knew he couldn’t wait any longer.

---

Willow just couldn’t shake the feeling that she had seen Hunter before. Had he been posing as a student awhile before she had used her vine to rip him from the sky? Despite his upbringing, Willow had a feeling this form of undercover did not come so naturally to him. She was certain that had he been at Hexisde before today she would’ve noticed with certainty. Had she seen him at the market maybe? Perhaps there was a day where he wanted to avoid attention and did not wear his mask as he bought trinkets and groceries. Even then, he was hardly the type to indulge in leisure; she had a feeling it was unlikely he’d linger in a crowd long enough for her to catch a glimpse of his maroon eyes or the way his gap tooth showed when he smiled.

Stranger still, the things that seemed most familiar about him were the more detail oriented. He seldom smiled, as though he was saving it, but when he did it made Willow’s heart and head spin like they were working together to create a whirlpool of deja vu.

There weren’t many places their paths could have crossed, maybe it was as far back as before she and Amity had their falling out. The Blights did alot of business with the emperor, maybe he had accompanied Darius once when he was picking up an order while she was over visiting.

Maybe she had walked by him at Covention? But wouldn’t he be too busy and wearing his mask the whole time? Oh, it was going to kill her! She had to know! As her mind began to race, her scroll let out a tiny ding.

Willow’s heart froze for a moment as she opened the app and a huge smile engulfed her face.

Rulerzreachf4n wants to send you a message

She quickly accepted.

RULERZREACHF4N: hI

RULERZREACHF4N: iT s hunt er.

RULERZREACHF4N: Im s orry about the ki DNApping stuf f

“Woah,” giggled Willow as another text bubble appeared. “He is a slow typer.”

“Is that Hunter?” Gus asked. “Oh thank Titan, is he finally messaging you?”

“Yeah, he-,” her smiled dropped and she brought her scroll closer to her face. “Huh, that’s weird.”

“What?” asked Gus.

“I went to respond to him and it looks like we already had other messages,” said Willow, scrolling. “But how? Unless he was already following me but i- wait.” She went silent again as she explored the interactions of their profiles. “Hunter was already following me on penstagram and he liked like all of my pictures too.”

“Oh haha that’s so weird,” said Gus nervously. “Lemme see your scroll, I bet it’s like a virus or something I can fix, just let me-.”

He went to reach for her scroll but Willow pulled it aware, giving him a suspicious look.

Gus sighed. “Okay, listen; it’s… complicated. But we all promised Hunter we wouldn’t say anything. I didn’t wanna delete your conversations so I blocked him on your account until he was ready, but I didn’t know he was gonna wait this long!”

“What are you talking about?”

“I think… this might be something he has to tell you in person.”

---

Could he just message her?

Hey, this is totally random but I actually already kind of knew you but you don’t remember me. So I know alot about you, but not in a creepy way because I like you… also not in a creepy way. I might seem creepy but I-

“Oh boy that’s a run-on sentence for sure,” he said, looking at the gibberish he typed. But every time he went to try and fix it it made things worse. He put his scroll away as he continued to walk around the castle garden, hoping inspiration would strike.

Wasn’t the plan always to start over? Didn’t he want her view of him to be brand new? The fresh start was tempting, but now that he had Willow back in his life, he couldn’t wait any longer. He wanted to dive back in, he wanted to know everything that had happened since the last time he saw her. He had an outside view from her penstagram, Gus had found a way to still allow him access to her through that but we wanted to know more beyond her cute captions. He wanted to show her all the cute photos of Flapjack he had taken (the palisman wanted more than anything to meet the girl his boy ranted about so often), to share with her all the new plants he had seen on mission in demand dangerous parts of the Isles, more than anything he wanted to hear her laugh again.

Okay, maybe he could compromise. Maybe he could still be this cool and confident person to her, and slowly bring up other moments they had shared. But to only keep the good parts and omit the awkward and embarrassing moments was lying, wasn’t it? Willow had never lied to him, even in her attempts to spare his feelings she always found a better way to phrase things, but she would never lie to him.

But if he wanted her to know about the way his heart stopped when she held his hand during their moonlight conjuring, he’d have to admit that he had not been invited and how Luz did not hesitate to remind him every time he spoke. If he wanted her to know about the fun they had at Covention darting to all the different booths as he pulled rank to get her the best swag, he’d have to share that he was only able to do so because Lilith thought he was an annoying twerp and said she gave him a headache. If he wanted Willow to know him, she had to know all the parts of him that he didn’t like.

But she hadn’t seemed to mind them so much the first time around.

He would have been Caleb forever if he had his way. To have Willow look at him with pride when they had won the match, to be someone she associated with strength and victory and talent. But Gus would know of his deception and conceal his connection to the coven would only create more trouble. But- oh his head was spinning with all the things he could do next he felt like he was upside down.

And then he was literally upside down.

He could tell by the skillful way the vines wrapped around him that she had captured him by launching the vine over the branch of the nearby tree and pulling back like a well crafted trap so he’d be helpless to her ambush. His eyes shook open to meet hers, a sparkling peridot green littered with embers of suspicion and determination.

“H-hey captain,” he sputtered both happy and terrified to see her. “W-what’s going on?”

“You tell me,” she said, holding up her scroll and using her finger to scroll through a stream of messages spanning over several months.

Oh yeah, he thought, she can see those now.

“Heh, uh I-I can explain…”

“I’m waiting.”

He could explain, he just didn’t know how. Where was he supposed to start?

“So, uh, here’s the thing I was… well, we were… I mean, okay so-.”

Willow slowly released him to the ground, trying to decipher why exactly he’d be so nervous. She wasn’t totally sure what she had been expecting. As he dusted himself off, she tried to pinpoint what exactly she had been hoping he’d say. Maybe it was more complicated than she thought. The fact that she had come all this way so late instead of messaging or calling him told her that deep down she already knew it was complicated.

Hunter took a deep breath and started over, from the beginning.

“We’ve met before.”

“Hmmm,” said Willow, careful not to jump to conclusions. Hunter could tell she was rightfully skeptical.

“Wait, wait! Proof! I have proof!” He frantically exclaimed, reaching into the pocket of his jacket to grab something. “Here!”

He held between his fingers what appeared to be a small piece of paper. Willow reached out and carefully took it, sensing he kept it on his person and close by for a reason. She turned it around and saw it was a photograph of them. She could tell by the texture that it was a memory, her memory. But she could not recall it.

She was laughing, her smile bright and wide. In one arm, she held a stunning Juliet orchid, a bright healthy golden yellow and the other one pulled Hunter close to her as his face held an expression of pride. She remembered when she had finally gotten the orchid to bloom, getting her into the advanced perennial placements which was composed of only the most gifted students about to graduate. She had been so proud of herself for finally conjuring it, but her memory had her alone when the orchid appeared.

“How did you get this?”

“Luz said you had been doing a school assignment about memory and ones involving me had somehow been destroyed,” he said. “But then she mentioned that there might be memories of me intact back in your classroom. So I went to the school and this was one she had pulled that had me in it. It wasn’t anything major and Eda said trying to restore them would do more harm than good, that it wouldn’t make me relevant or anything, just familiar looking, like any other stranger.”

He said the words delicately like being a stranger to her was a fate worse than death. Despite the seriousness of the matter, Willow had a feeling he had. A flair for the dramatics.

“But it meant that if we ever did meet again that you wouldn’t be able to totally register me,” he said. “So I kept it because strangers don’t produce vivid memories like this.”

“This is only one photo,” she said. “It’s possible that it did-.”

“No, because I have a matching memory!” He said, reaching down to pull another photo from his pocket. “See?”

The photos were nearly identical. They were of the same moment, that was certain, but there was variation in their faces. In Willow’s memory, Hunter’s face matched her own but in Hunter's there was a rosy tint to the scene and his smile seemed more flustered.

“Weird,” she breathed. “Why does yours look different?”

“Because I think that’s the moment when I started…”

Her eyes darted from the photo to him now, trying to read his expression to know why he couldn’t finish that sentence.

“Yeah?”

“It was… an important moment.”

“Oh,” she said, looking at the photo again. “Yeah, it was for me. But how did helping me with an assignment make it important for you?”

“Because I helped you,” he said simply. “I mean, I’m supposed to help people all the time I-I try to, but you were so excited that I felt… important. I was happy because you were happy and… I dunno, it just felt nice.”

Willow brought the picture closer to her face. She couldn’t help but feel slightly memorized by her own face, seeing herself smile so wide, so obviously happy in a moment that was partially lost to her. There was no question about how she felt here, and it felt odd to feel envious of herself. Something in her heart told her that she really liked knowing this boy, and even more so she liked being known by him.

Had it been any other girl in the photo, she’d say with complete confidence that they were a couple.

“Were we… friends?” She asked carefully, hoping he’d understand the deeper meaning within the question.

He didn’t. “Oh yeah,” he said. “Well… yeah, I like to think so. Sorry, I’m still getting used to a lot of normal teenager things but I think… yeah; we were friends. You were a really great friends, er are a really great friend.”

“Were we… just friends?” She tried again, biting her lip trying not to get her hopes up. But something told her it needed to be asked. Maybe it was how incredibly charming she found his smile, was her mind trying to bring back a memory or had she always just thought he was cute?

“Yeah,” he said quickly, his face turning a faint red. “Well, uh, I-I-I uh think so. I mean, there were times where we- where I- thought that maybe we could-.”

He looked back up at her and caught her eyes, wide and hanging on his every word. She trusted him, he held parts of her past that were unreachable to her. He didn’t want to risk twisting her understanding or putting his own thoughts in her mind just because he hoped they had once been similar. But as much as he admired her, those eyes reminded him how he chickened out every time he got close to bringing up his feelings. They just left him too paralyzed and entranced, even when she considered him a stranger.

“Yeah?” She prompted him to finish. He gulped and pressed on.

“Well, I guess… I know how I felt but I can’t speak for how you felt,” he said carefully.

“Do you… still feel that way?”

“I mean I uh…. Well, it doesn’t really matter,” he said with a forced chuckle that suggested the opposite. “I can’t just expect things to go back to the way they were.”

“Why not?”

“Well, I have more responsibilities now- we both do, I suppose,” he said. “Before, I’d have the occasional mission but now I’m the head of the Emperor's coven. And I’m not supposed to have those feelings anyway.”

She felt her breath stop, as though trying to make the world quieter so she could hear his words longer. She could tell Hunter had a hard time with words if they were informal, so it was possible he was referring merely to friendship. But something about the way he couldn’t decide if he should or shouldn’t look at her, the way she could tell he definitely wanted to, allowed her to assume it was more. Either way, he had feelings for her and she wanted so desperately to hear more about them.

“Well, I won’t hold that against you,” she assured him. “I know we can’t undo me forgetting you, and I know I’m never going to remember things involving you from my perspective, but it makes sense. There are times where I feel like there’s a hole, like a skip. Things that Luz or Gus will say that just don’t quite line up or make total sense and I’m guessing those are things that involve you, conversations we had.”

“Yeah,” said Hunter. “I really liked talking to you.”

“I liked talking to you too,” she said. “Well, I’m assuming so after browsing through our old messages on penstagram. A lot of late nights.”

He blushed. “Yeah, I uh keep strange hours,” he said. “But you always said it was okay.”

“Is your keyboard broken or something?” She chuckled. “Cuz a lot of them I had to read two or three times.”

“Oh, uh no I’m still getting used to typing,” he laughed. “I’m probably not better now, you were really the only person I ever messaged.”

“Well, I’d love to go over them with you,” she said. “And maybe you can fill me in on some other things we used to talk about.”

“Like what?”

She shrugged. “Luz said you used to come to Owl House all the time,” said Willow. “But did we ever hang out, like just us? Did we have inside jokes or did I tell you all my secrets? I’ve got some catching up to do.”

“I can write them down for you too,” he said with a smile. “My handwriting is much better than my typing, I promise.”

“I’d like that,” she smiled, she always did love getting letters. “But why didn’t you try sooner?”

“I wanted to make a better first impression, I wanted to be better,” he said. “When I first met you, I was unkind and rude and just not very pleasant. But spending time with you… made me happier and I think it made me more fun to be around. I wanted you to see the best version of me because I just really… value your opinion.”

“So why didn’t you just introduce yourself?”

“There was never a good time,” he sighed as he started to pace. “Whenever I did see you before, it was because I snuck away or you found me. I didn’t want to rush it because what if I said something that would be okay if you knew me but not if it was the first thing I ever said to you and it made you never want to see me again? It had to be perfect. I wanted you to think I was cool and worth knowing.”

“Well, I think it’s sweet how important to you it was but I’m pretty sure you had nothing to worry about.”

He smiled and shook his head. He knew it was true, deep down. He knew Willow was wise and kind and patient. He knew she’d give him a second chance if he embarrassed himself, he knew she could see more in people than they could see in themselves.

“Anyway, I just couldn’t wait any longer because I-.”

“Realized how silly you were being?”

“Because I missed you too much,” he finished softly. He said it like it was the only constant truth he had ever known, so simple and yet the weight it carried could easily crush him. He missed seeing her smile up close, he missed his name on her lips, he missed the way the air seemed lighter around her. Starting over didn't seem so bad as long as he got the chance to spend time with her again. The feeling was almost overwhelming, being so close to the way things were before.

Willow wondered if the feeling in her heart was familiar or brand new as she felt his gaze surround her. Everything about him seemed sharp and jagged but the moment she found his eyes, he was the softest boy in the world. They had known pain, anger and loneliness but the moment they registered her she saw it all melt away and he gladly succumbed to the comfort of her company. She had a feeling the adrenaline that coursed through her veins and made her face flush wasn’t solely from the match.

“I think… I missed you too,” she said. She knew it didn’t make sense but at the same time nothing had ever made more sense. She knew was saying she missed someone she had never met as far as she knew, but she had felt this way before. She had felt this way with Gus and with Luz, like they were always meant to be with her. Like when she’d think of a happy memory from before they had met, her mind wanted to insert them in it. But this was different. Because Hunter actually could fall into these memories.

He smiled, welcoming the contradiction, grateful for it even. He looked like he might cry, as though no one had ever said they had missed him before.

A comfortable silence twirled between them and just like with every comfort Hunter provided Willow wondered how many times she had felt this way and if she had intended to do anything about it.

“So… have you tried to come back any other times?” she asked, fiddling with her braid.

“Well, uh… the first time,” started Hunter clearing his throat, slightly self-conscious. “Was uh, a little while after the incident. I wanted to see if you recovered, give you time to see if anything could be done because I uh… well, right before that happened I was bringing you some reading material I had found about Gromethius, since he lives beneath your school.”

Translation: Suddenly I could tie everything I read back to you somehow as an excuse to come share it with you.

“And you told me that they treat his awakening as a big party and I was commenting on how ridiculous the event sounded and you asked me if I wanted to see it for myself. I said I couldn’t just go because I didn’t attend Hexisde and it wasn't a threat that constituted coven involvement. And you asked if I wanted to go so you could show me that it could be fun.”

“And you said yes?” Willow blushed. She had never had the courage to ask someone to Grom and he made her seem like it wasn’t something she’d freak out about. Was she actually this cool or did it just seem that way to him?

“Of course I did,” he said instinctively, suddenly unable to look at her. “Then Gus mentioned how going to Grom with someone has certain… implications. And it was all I could think about the whole week. Whether you had asked me as a friend or a-as a date.”

“So… which was it?”

“Well, we didn’t actually get to go to Grom.” He chuckled softly. “When it came around, you had already forgotten me so I couldn’t really ask you about something you couldn’t remember. But I thought it might be a good time to meet again.”

It really would’ve been, she thought.

“But then there was added pressure because I still don't know if it was a date and you don’t remember asking me and you could’ve asked someone else or been asked by someone else so what if I showed up and you were-.”

“So you didn’t come?”

“No, I did… er, for a minute,” he said. “At the end.”

Her eyes lit up, making a connection. She let out a small gasp. “You were the boy with the bouquet.”

“I… yeah,” he said quietly.

She remembered it so clearly.

When the excitement of Grom was winding down, Willow had stepped outside for some air. It was the most interesting Grom in years, that was sure. She was there with her friend, she loved how she looked, she was having fun but it still felt like something was… missing. It itched at the back of her mind all night. Had she forgotten to turn in an assignment? Had she left the oven on? Was there something she had meant to bring with her?

Nevertheless, she took in the nighttime view in solitude, the distant sound of music pouring into the dark sky from the school. Usually at this point she would be overcome with nerves at the possibility of being Grom queen, but this year she didn’t have that anxiety. Of course, no one wants to face Grom and she certainly wasn’t disagreeing with that logic but something inside felt that now she would be capable of it. Funny how so much has changed in so little time. Who knows what next year would look like? Maybe she’d even have someone to-

“Wow,” her thoughts were interrupted by a soft voice she was sure she wouldn’t be able to hear if the door wasn’t closed. She turned and saw a boy in a finely tailored golden suit, like a prince who had escaped from a fairytale book.

“You look beautiful,” he breathed. And despite knowing that no one else was outside except her, it took her a moment to realize he was talking to her.

“Oh, uh thank you?” She said, not certain why she had phrased it like a question. She tucked her hair behind her ear, eating to see if he’d correct himself or take it back. But he didn’t. He just stood there, staring at her like she had been staring at the moon as he held his bouquet tightly. Despite a matching gold masquerade mask covering most of his face, the strong burgundy of his eyes found her in the moonlight. He looked like he was waiting for someone.

“Oh, sorry,” she said. “I’m probably interrupting something, huh? Sorry if you were waiting for someone I should-.”

“No!” He said, louder than he meant to before becoming bashful. “I-I mean uh well, I am kind of. Waiting for someone that is.”

“Oh, okay,” she said, understanding what waiting for someone on Grom night with a bouquet of flowers signified. She smiled. “Do you want me to go see if they’re inside?”

“No, no I uh know she’s not in there,” he said.

“Oh,” she said, and her heart sank for this lonely golden boy. “Oh, I’m sorry. Does she know you’re waiting?”

“No, I don’t think so,” he said. “But it’s okay, really. I just uh… it’s complicated.”

“Gotcha,” she said. For some reason, she related. She had never had something beyond a crush that the other party never even knew about, for some reason her heart understood the sentiment of not knowing where you stood with someone. Like she had been in his shoes in another life. “It’s uh, a really nice bouquet. You have good taste.”

“Yeah? Uh, thanks,” he said looking down at the flowers, as though waiting for them to weigh in.

“You’re welcome.’

“Would it be okay if I… gave them to you?” he asked, tentatively handing her the flowers. It was a lovely collection, she could tell it was carefully chosen and obviously made by someone who knew about floriography or made for someone who knew a lot about floriography.

“Are you sure?” She asked, captivated by the colors. “It’s so lovely, I wouldn’t want to-.”

“No, please,” he said. “It would mean a lot to me, really.”

“Well, okay,” she obliged, her nose instantly filing with the sweet, fresh aroma. Whoever this girl was, she had clearly done quite a number on him. “Thank you, I’ll take good care of them.”

“I know you will,” he said as though he knew her. She took in the collection and when she looked up to ask if he wanted to go inside and dance with her and her friends, he was gone. Had she not held the bouquet she had crafted, she would have sworn she had imagined him.

And now he stood before her once again.

“I still have it,” she said.

“What?”

“The bouquet,” she said. “You picked lovely, healthy flowers. They’re still in a vase on my desk in my room.

“Oh,” said Hunter, trying to hide his blush. “That’s… cool. I-I’m glad.”

“You should’ve stayed,” she continued. “We still could’ve danced.”

“Yeah, well…” he sighed, he wished he had stayed too.

“So… if it had been a date… you still would’ve came?” Willow asked as nonchalantly as she could.

“Huh?” Hunter said

“I uh… well, I mean it would be rude to turn down an invitation,” he stammered. “Especially to such a formal event I mean I-.”

“Did you want it to be a date?” She asked more directly.

“I… don’t know,” he admitted. “I don’t know if I’d know the difference? I just know I wanted to spend time with you and you looked really pretty and it made me feel stupid. I don’t know what that’s about.”

“I think I might,” she said, tucking her hair behind her air. The action felt familiar, instinctual. Like something about his voice triggered the response as though it had done it before. “Did you know there’s different kinds of memories?”

“Well yes, there’s important and less important, pleasant ones and unpleasant ones...”

“No,” she giggled. “I mean there’s different ways to remember things. Like smells can be linked to memories, not just visual things. Feelings and sounds.”

“Oh, yeah sure.”

“And when you talk to me, the sound of your voice just feels… familiar,” she said. “And I know I’ve never heard someone with a voice like yours before because it’s very-.”

“Annoying, I know,” he sighed as though embarrassed. “I hear the scouts talk about it all the time I’m trying to-.”

“No, not at all,” she cut him off. “No, I think it’s nice. It’s very unique is what I wanted to say. Like at Grom it was like my mind was racing trying to place it trying to connect it. The way it does when you hear part of a song you know you like but you don’t know the name. The way I feel when I smell a flower I’ve only ever smelled before in a bigger garden. ”

“Oh,” was all he could say. He had never had someone genuinely like his voice, let alone compare any aspect of him to a flower or a song .

“So even though I can’t remember things we did or things we said, I think I somehow can remember the way you made me feel,” she said. “I don’t think we got that far in the lesson so I’m not sure how it’s possible but I just… feel like I know you.’

“Is it… a good feeling?” He hesitated to ask.

She smiled and reached out to take his hand. “It’s a very good feeling,” she said.

He looked down at their hands and as much as everything about it made his heart race in elation, a twinge of guilt made its way through as memories he tried to forget bubbled up to the surface.

He sighed. This was the part he was dreading, this is what made coming back to her so hard. “It’s just…things have changed.”

“Yeah, but they’d change anyway,” she shrugged.

“But what if…” he hated himself for what he was about to say. “What if you’re better off without me?”

“What?”

“I mean, I dunno,” he removed his hand from hers and wrung his together, trying to delay the panic the realization brought with it. “W-what if I would’ve held you back? Or distracted you? I mean you’re so amazing and talented and people are always saying I’m in the way, what if I got in the way of you realizing your potential?”

“Hunter,” she couldn’t help but chuckle, considering the fact that she had just shown her a core memory that had started her rise to the top of her track that directly involved him. But he continued to rant.

“I-I mean whose to say I wouldn’t have ruined things eventually? I mean, you were always helping me and listening to me but why would I just assume that I was as important to you as you are to me-.”

“Hunter…”

“I mean, what if the enemies of the coven try to put your life in danger because of how they feel about me? Not to mention the Blight girl told me to stay away from you-.”

“Wait, what?”

Hunter’s words caught up with him and he was just too on a roll to not explain himself further.

“We had a… run in at Exclipe Lake,” he said. “She said I was a lot like her, and that you and her weren’t on the best terms. I mean, I figured that from the fact that she set your mind on fire. But she said that I would make your life complicated, that I might hurt you even if I didn’t mean to. And I … I don’t want to do that..”

“She thought you would hurt me?”

“I would never try to!” He said in a panic. “But I know what she means, the younger Blight and I have certain expectations to fill. My responsibilities nearly put you in danger, this wasn’t the first time. I should have realized I couldn’t change that.”

Willow’s hands balled into fists at her sides, thorny vines rose from the ground as though preparing to strike. “Did she say…” Willow took a deep breath and tried to steady her voice. “Did she say you shouldn’t be in my life?”

“Not in so many words,” Hunter admitted. He knew the youngest Blight had history with Willow, he knew she knew her better than maybe he ever could. He had to entertain the possibility that she was right about him. “But the evidence… is pretty compelling.”

“I see,” Willow said softly.

After all this time, after everything that’s happened… she still thinks I’m weak. She thinks I’m foolish, that I can’t handle getting hurt. I can’t make my own choices. She thinks she knows better. She doesn’t see that she’s being a total hypocrite. After everything I’ve done to support her and Luz despite how uncomfortable it made me, despite how it stung, despite how I’m still not sure if Amity would work as hard as Hunter had to come back into my life had Luz not landed on the Isles. But once again, what does it matter what I want? Had Amity been behind everyone keeping Hunter from her? Why had they not tried harder to help him?

Because once again, Amity is deciding who can and can’t be in my life.

“So… I want you to decide,” he said. “And I’ll accept whatever decision you make, good and or indifferent. I’ll tell you whatever you want or know and if you decide your life is better without me… I won’t intervene. I just… I had to try. I at least wanted to see you one last time.”

Willow’s eyes darted back up to him, this boy so certain and uncertain at the same time. He was willing to fight for her, he trusted her, he knew her.

He wanted her.

Maybe it was stupid and soon and impulsive and reckless but when his waiting eyes called out to her, they drew her in with such a force that even the Titan themself could not hold her back. The next thing she knew, Hunter’s face was squished between her hands, his ears wiggling and his face crimson as Willow committed the expression to memory and took one final breath before pressing her lips to his. He quickly melted into the contact, somehow knowing to place his hand on her cheek as he pulled her closer to make sure this was real, that she was finally real again. As she felt his lips form a timid smile, Willow knew the sensation was new but the excitement was undoubtedly familiar.

#huntlow #huntlow fanfiction #toh #the owl house #Hunter toh #Willow park #owl house au

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beanibon · 1 year

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Could you write headcanons about Vash dating someone who also has a bounty on their head? Not from anything like murder or thievery, but a sizable group that holds a personal vendetta against them. Hope this isn't too vague. Thanks.

I think I do, kinda as if they wronged someone and they put a hit/bounty on them? (At least that my understanding)

TW: not any really, do let me know if I need to add any

Vash didn't really know the extent of your bounty the first time he met you, nor did he ask as it wasn't his business to. But since you've started dating you were a little more open about it, explaining how you've somehow ended up wronging an old gang your family was apart of.

Vash was super understanding, vowing he'd protect you if anyone dared to harm you. In a non-violent way of course, which you'd be lying if that didn't worry you.

You respected Vash's code of no killing, but you weren't much of a fighter yourself, so you still embarrassingly needed to heavily rely on him for protection.

After a particularly nasty incident regarding a few bounty hunters, you begged Vash to teach you how to shoot a gun. He reluctantly agreed, only after hissing in pain of pulling another bullet from his shoulder.

It took you a while to gain enough confidence to shoot a gun, even after weeks of Vash teaching you. Something about shooting others, even for survival felt wrong.

Since the both of you have bounty's on your heads, it makes it hard to have intimate moments. Hotels could be hard to book, meaning snuggled together in a single sleeping bag, which neither of you minded, but I bed would've been more ideal.

Vash, who is extremely touch-starved, always wants to have you close. Especially if you two barely escaped being shot full of bullets, he'd want to hold you close, nuzzle into you, fill his senses with you. It reassures him that you're still there, still alive and with him.

The one major issue with being constantly on the run, is there'll always be trouble lurking around every corner. A shoot out waiting to happen the moment you two sneak into a town, someone will recognise either you or Vash, or both.

You've been injured a few times, only by a blade though, as you're wanted alive. But there was one occasion where a bounty hunter got a little too trigger happy, resulting in a bullet burying itself deep in your thigh.

Vash spent that entire afternoon, doting on you in the hospital. He was worried sick the moment you screamed out, by your side in a heartbeat.

He pampered you. Just imagine all the donuts he'd buy you, if flowers grew on Gunsmoke you best believe the room would be full to the brim with a variety of them. He never left your side, apologising constantly for not keeping an eye on you.

You simply smiled, ruffling his hair as you kissed him, reassuring him that it wasn't his fault. He appreciated that, pushing you over a little so he could snuggle up next to you.

(Was scolded by the nurses the next morning).

Vash cares for you deeply, and will do anything to make sure you're safe and living life to its fullest. He loves you and you love him, if circumstances were different he was sure you'd both be happily together in an old cabin, cuddling on a sofa.

#trigun stampede #trigun #vash #vash the stampede #vash x reader #vash x you #vash the stampede x reader #trigun x reader

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payidaresque · 1 year

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The New Editor tips and tricks (sort of)

So, i got a lot of interesting activity with my recent poll regarding what editor content makers actually use, and i noticed that some people (well, most actually) really struggle while using it. And as i'm using it for some time now, i found some ways or actually making it work better/be less annoying. Please note that this is in no way an attempt to try to force anyne to start using it, this post is desinged to be a help post for those who may not know how some of its functions work, and maybe an informative post for others, and maybe make content maker's life a little bit easier, and that's it!!!

If you're intrested, please read below. And please pass it along so more people can see it! Thank you. Warning: image/gif heavy!!!

Add more images after you already added some This is useful if you want to add a gif to one side only. If your making a comparison gifset, for example. After you added your gifs, click on the space between them until you see a blue line, and then hit enter. This is useful because you don't need to drag your gif all around, and if it's added to one side, it sticks to one side only. The same applies to the other side

Reorder gifs The most handy way would be by dragging them by those 4 squares thingy. The blue lines may be distracting, but think of it as the guides as to where your content will be placed

Double check What I mean by that is this: when i add my gifs, they usually added into text editor itself, so in order to be sure, I take a gif, and drag it one level above, like this:

Obviously, the new editor needs a hell lot of work before getting implemented permanently, but i hope this will be at least of some help for those who strugling. There's a lot of issues with text formatting as well, maybe it's the matter of a habbit that i don't find it very hard as of uploading/rearranging gifs anymore, my main issue with it, personally, is that it makes my content look ugly for others (surprisingly, they look as intended to me, i checked it like several times before). I do understand that staff needs to update the code that was written over a decade ago, and it's important to think of it from the technical side of things too, because it may be that the old code is outdated, so they simply can't use it anymore, even if they wanted to, cause you know, progress is never sleeps, in every aspect of life, especially such a complicated thing as programming and coding

What i'm trying to say is, that as a content maker myself (i've been making content, mainly gifs, for over 7 years on here), i understand the frustration. Trust me, it pisses me off too. What staff can do tho, is fix the existing bugs

Don't just complain. Explain. Angry tags in reblogs won't help the case. Send them feedback/tickets telling what issues you personally have with the new editor, preferably with screenshots/gifs to show off the problem, so they know it's not just words but actually see the problem. And try to be as detailed as possible. The new editor kinda sucks, but it's nothing that can't be fixed And maybe they'll listen to us

#tumblah #userbecca #usermorgan #userburn #userkayjay #userelenagilbert #miatendos #usernat #userlarri #userauds #userauden #usermattz #andremichaux #tuserheidi

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snoopyliker · 5 months

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okay so heres the thing i think it seemed like santo berço would be connected to this symbol and the esoterrorists. clearly they don’t seem to be. they didnt understand how they even found their hidden village. they’re suspicious and theres definitely something at play in regards to the membrane and the creatures attacking them for the fire. generally they do just appear to be a rather simple village of people just co existing with the rules of their world. and all the more unnatural things that come with it and yet theres this symbol. which is used an indicator of whose doing it. kinda like a warning of we’re here. attacking the animals and now The Helper and leaving the symbol. we know its esoterrorist related so it has to be esoterrorists right? but why attack santo berço in such a way? i’d thought that esoterrorists would like santo berço.

okay so we clearly know theres someone or something attacking this village and making it plainly obvious to them again like a warning. so someones or something is in santo berço which again was supposedly hard to find. they said our characters were the first to enter without a pilgrim so by that logic it wasnt someone who just entered like our characters they accepted and were welcomed. Or somehow snuck in. and they didnt notice at all. though that would be something to investigate the gatekeeper on since thats his job to watch who enters the town. but i wonder how easy it is to go unnoticed in the “night.” they hide and close all their windows and such so it seems like the optimal time to enter or leave.

im trying to understand this symbol and what its means because we saw it on all those creatures they fought like the spider, the rats, the corpse, and we know those were experiments by the scientists and doctors so theyre related to this symbol. we saw it on the old mans burned back whom had it for years seemingly and who held a paper with many different phrases and had a symbol drawn on it as well. we also saw the symbol when theyd touch the sludge theyd begin to draw it into the goo as they lost sanity or hp cant recall which exactly. it was in the sanitarium in the cells of the daughter and wife whom merged drawn all over. we saw the symbol when thiago was in the spiders cocoon whilst mentally in a white endless maze. and now its appearing on or by these dead animals and people. my own personal thoughts on what i thought the symbol meant was some type of nod to time being a sort of spiral but in regards to what it all means and how its all connected in the mystery i feel likeits 3:24 . i need to sleep. im never forgiving ordem for destroying my sleep schedule like this

#osnflivevodding

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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 1 year

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tagged by @postwarlevi!!! i wanted to reblog but it got long so i'm making a new thread 😅

this is so cute 🥺🥺 any chance to talk about katvi i'll take it (✿◡‿◡)

1. who is the better cook?

him for sure, although neither of us are too big of a fan of cooking. i think he just tolerates it more than i do, although i do think there are some recipes he legitimately enjoys

2. who takes longer showers?

me. idk if its the adhd but i tend to forget how much time i spend in there and before i know it, he has to poke his head into the bathroom as a passive aggressive way of telling me that i stole all the hot water 😭

3. who is more organized?

him for sure. a point of contention with us is that i'm way too messy and it drives him through the roof. some boundaries had to be established and while it still makes him grumpy sometimes, he respects my space

4. who generally spends more money?

neither? technically me because if i get fixated on something, i'll tend to impulse shop but usually limit it to small-ish things or wait until they're on sale! he likes buying specialty teas and coffees and sometimes those can get kinda pricey, so i think we roughly break even

5. who likes sleeping in more?

hmm. i think this is difficult to answer because we both suffer from pretty bad insomnia. i think if it's who ends up sleeping in for longer, it's me. i'm the type that'll take like 4-5 hours to fall asleep but i can stay asleep once the sun rises (which is incredibly annoying) his insomnia is the type where he can get shut-eye for like 20 minutes at a time, which usually translates to him getting out of bed as soon as the sun starts to rise regardless of if he slept or not

6. who is the better driver?

im a passenger princess (✿◡‿◡) but also because driving gives me anxiety because i've gotten into accidents before, so he just does it for me, so it's levi for sure

7. who is the most stubborn?

hard to say. i think me. he usually gives in first because he gets way too irritated and is just like "whatever".

8. who is the most romantic?

neither 👁️👄👁️ at least not in the traditional sense. maybe me because i'm a sucker for romantic sunset walks (✿◡‿◡) but also him because sometimes he'll leave cute little notes around the house for me and it makes me melt (i have a little collection of them :3)

9. who is more laid back?

me. i think he's overall more extra or particular than i am. and this isn't in regards to him needing clean spaces. that's fine. i'm talking about the extra amount of work he constantly puts into every little thing, especially when it comes to house projects or even picking out toys for the cats. whereas i'm just kinda like...as long as it's not doing harm, convenience is king

10. who is more likely to ask for directions?

me. and it's a silly reason. like yes, i'm directionally confused a lot but i think levi would want to just. wander around and hope we get unlost and i'm not interested in doing that.

11. who is the blanket hog?

also me 😅 i get very fitful when my insomnia acts up, which usually translates into me wanting to hug something (why, you ask? no idea), whether it's him, a pillow, my plushie, or (in most cases), the blanket.

12. who is more likely to lose their phone?

him. he's technologically confused, which translates him to just not really using his phone unless he has to. it also means he's shit at answering texts on time >:(

13. who initiated the first kiss?

him because i was too shy 😅 i still thought it was some kind of joke as to why he was even interested in me, so i never really made a move.

14. who fell in love first?

hard to say. probably me since i was crushing on him forever, but he was the one that reached out and started stuff soooooo who knows

15. who planned the honeymoon?

him, mostly? he decided what we wanted to do. he was very extra about it, wanting to make it worth our money and get like the maximum amount of r&r with the least amount of stress, which i lowkey appreciated sm 😭 i was the one that did all the booking and reservations tho lol

#: @romantichomicide95 @luvjiro @leviismybby @jayteacups @lucysarah-c @whoami-72 @sixpennydame @wyvernslovecake @stygianoir @einnyl @nube55 @svftackerman @roseofdarknessblog @bita-bita @averysmolbear @youre-ackermine @thevelria @crazychaoticizzy @littlerequiem @notgoodforlife @bloompompom @ackermendick @sad-darksoul + anyone who wants to join! if you don't partake in self-shipping, then please ignore! ＜（＾－＾）＞

#tag games #selfship #katvi

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feline-evil · 9 months

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Its da freaking new year baby

I mean it turned new year like 13 hours and thirty minutes ago for me i was just busy and didn't post here at the time. Anyways.

2023 has been A Lot for me! On one hand my wrist issues finally fully caught up to me and it's one of the first years i've not been able to draw as much during which has been. Very hard. It's been a year of health issues and my body kinda failing me in a lotta regards so it's not been great on that front. But it's also the first year i got to meet my boyfriend in person, twice!!! And realise how much more beautiful and kind and loving life can be, and how much i wanna survive onwards and upwards and do wicked gay shit with that man in future years, it's the year that being so loved has given me the courage to make BIG FUCKING RISKS and plan for BIG FUCKING CHALLENGES in upcoming years, and thats awesome. I couldn't be the man i have been this year without him, i really couldn't. I'm so grateful to finally have a partner and friends and love and gentleness, it is something that was so sorely missing in my life and it is something that's keeping me going even in the darker months.

It's also the year i took risks in other stuff too, which i never could've done without my bf's support, and now i've been able to work on so many things for The Hotel Podcast and thats fucking AWESOME?? I GET TO MAKE STUFF FOR THE SHOW I LOVE?? I did the artbook and we got to do the second calendar which ruuuuled, i made a postcard, i've done some other stuff ;), i made a 3d background and learnt some video editing for it; i've accomplished so much even against my body and wrist failing and i feel so so proud of that, and no matter how things go i wanna keep trying to do more. I feel like i'm finally showing what i can do. I hope people can see how much effort and will goes into what i do, i hope it pays off and that you enjoy it!

I wish i could say i left this year on a high note due to all that good that's happened to me and i mostly am absolutely. But in all honesty i also went to sleep last night filled with a palpable dread, this past week i realised someone close to me has, without getting into it to a degree i'm not willing to share online, gone down a pipeline to become a person i'm not comfortable with while i've been busy elsewhere. I went to bed knowing that either 2024 would have to be a year of potentially risky confrontation, of running, or of begrudgingly resigning myself to making sure i isolate anyone i care about away from. This. So thats a shadow hanging over me at the moment, and is one that has soured my week a little. I don't know what 2024 holds in regards to sorting this, it's a little scary.

I am going to be 27 this year, in February! And as i get closer and closer to thirty i realise that (while time isn't running out for me, for any of us) i really would like to move on into thriving rather than just surviving the years, and that part of that thriving needs to be transitioning and becoming independent from my parents. Of course the former is complicated due to the fact i am not able to be out to everyone in my life and even just starting the path to transitioning would out me and potentially destroy a part of my life that has been there for 26 years. There's also of course the fact i live in the uk and transitioning here is going to be a ten year waiting list if i'm even lucky and they deem me trans enough to transition l o l. So as you can imagine, thats complex and hard to figure out! On one hand i should start the process asap BECAUSE its such a long process here, but on the other hand i don't know how to handle my own safety and comfort in regards to being out to those i currently am not, and i'm not sure how my mental (and honestly physical) health would handle the fallout. The latter is complicated of course due to being broke, uneducated, physically and mentally unwell and a myriad of other factors; we don't live in a world where you can afford a home or to feed yourself anymore! So! Yknow!! Unlikely i'll be moving out anytime soon!

What i am doing at least is trying to thrive where i can, like dandelions growing in cracks the pavement may be unyielding to me at this moment but i can find the soft dirt inbetween; transitioning and independence may not be possible right now but i can continue to do my work and try to succeed there, i can make my room better for me (which i have done with finally getting a new bed after the one i had since i was a child grew no good), i can spend more time doing what i love out the house (visiting places, seeing my boyfriend, ect ect), and i can take what i can when i can. Maybe i'll try to learn to drive this year! I'm not sure i trust myself on the roads, but maybe i can learn to. And all of this is progress towards those final goals, even if i can't so much as step on the first rungs of the ladder towards them yet. I also take solace in knowing that for every dark cloud over me that makes my life feel so uncertain and hard to make it through there is incredible sunshine too; that even if the year is hard and cruel as they so often are i will still be loved i will still have friends and i will still get to smile. And that even if i can't accomplish big goals, a lot of small goals accomplished over many many bad years will build up, and one day i'll be free. And that's something.

My first hope for 2024 is THAT MY HEALTH GIVES ME A BREAK, NO MORE HEALTH SCARES PLEASE, and that perhaps i'll be able to even get some answer's and help for my physical health. My second is that my courage pays off and i succeed at flying alone for the first time to the states to be with my love! My third is that the year is kinder, and that i can make more art, maybe even regain some of the independence i had when my wrist was ok enough to let me do art as a job. My fourth is that i laugh a lot, and smile and have joyous moments with loved ones and indulge in what i love with unabashed and unashamed joy! And my fifth is that i get to do good for others, because even if i can't get out, even if i have to survive instead of thrive a little longer, i can at least try and help when i can.

Happy 2024, my chest hurts, my joints ache, but i'm still kicking and i will continue on forever. Bastards aren't getting free of me yet, i'm persistent. I haven't even ridden every rollercoaster in the UK yet.

#jay talkin #yeah sure fuckit lets overshare on jan 1st. lets get it all out our system there we go #happy new year everything is scary and possibilites are endless #but im really grateful for so much 2023 gave me i am so so so lucky

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inkedmyths · 2 years

Text

S2: E3 "Bloodlust"

Brought to you by I PROMISED Kayla yesterday I would watch more when I finished my essay so here I am

This episode featuring: Yet another member of the hunting community, veganism in a fashion, deep discussion on Dean and cowboys, and great fuckin music

Oh whats this song I think I know it

Is that Journey

Is that. Wheel in the Sky?

IT IS FUCK YEAAAA

Jammin I fuckin love this song. Great start

Oh look a scared woman in the woods. Seems standard

Is that the Benadryl Hat Man

Crepe: The What Kayla: probably

Why are you moving around the tree like that

OFF WITH HER HEAD!

OHHHH YEAH FUCK YEAH I LOVE THE SOUNDTRACK ON THIS EP! BACK IN BLACK AC/DC!!

[ Kayla reiterates that the SPN soundtrack is good. I like 70's ans 80's rock so I agree so far. ]

Dean: Woo car! Decapitated heads! Helllll yea!

Kayla: man's two true loves

Lmaoooo

I love them being terrible fake journalists

The cop: SATANISTS? LMAOOOO

Crepe: Everyone loves a Satanist Kayla: title of a black sabbath song Crepe: Really? Kayla: no just a joke Crepe: Oh

Wooo funky impersonations we're goin fast this episode

"Open it" "You open it" Lmaoooo

EWWW TOOTH? FANG???

VAMPIRE??

Whats goin on heeeere are the cowboy vampires back

[ Crepe replies saying it's worse, but at least has the kindness to spoiler hide the rest of the message. It just hid the word Vegan though. ]

[ Then Melon pops in, stating the time in his zone and expressing a worry for my sleep schedule. I told her it's fine, and that I actually am the furthest behind in terms of timezones amongst the group, as it was only a quarter til 9 pm at the time of that message. Not that xey shouldn't worry about my sleep schedule, because it is horrendous, but that's besides the point. ]

"So we're lookin for some people" "Sure it's hard to be lonely"

Ok so that guys gone. Watching them for sure

Yep

They're waiting for him?

Whshshs ok ok whats he want anyways

[ It is about this point where Melon, Crepe, and Kayla digress into some conversation regarding cowboys, vampires, and the resulting combination being a dilemma for Dean and his sexuality. Fascinating stuff, but I wasn't really paying attention as I was engrossed in whatever the Winchesters were doing onscreen. I will, however, transcribe it as well, because I think it's funnier that way. ]

Melon: Do you think cowboy vampires act as a paradox for deans concept of reality. One is something he desperately craves to be, and the other he hates some of the time. It’s like, the taping a piece of toast with jam to a shoe and throwing it. Which overrides the other? Crepe: That would be a very interesting take to explore Kayla: one of them is a kink and the other is vampiress

OHHH yeah hes a hunter?

Ok. Ok he's a little. Seems neat but. Idk. Brushes them off pretty fast. Hm.

Sure of himself? Or something else?

Ok garage guy. You gonna get murked orrrr

Crepe: Why is Dean into cowboys tho? Kayla: have you seen him interact with one heterosexually ever

What are you even looking for

Oh its a bird

Melon: But if faced with something you’re technically supposed to kill but is literally every kink you could ever want besides that one thing, what would dean do Kayla: fuck and kill probably. thats how they seem to usually operate Melon: Ok yeah you’re right Crepe: Monsterfucker and Monsterhunter

OOHHG FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Why is a vampire working a garage

[ Kayla says its a capitalist hellscape, even vampires need the money. Which. Fair. Gotta pay for those replacement clothes when you get blood on them I guess. ]

AAAAAAAA

Oh hey theres the Winchesters

Ewwwww chainsaw blood spatter. Kinda a look for Dean tho

[ Kayla and Melon both agree with this statement. ]

Sam whats up with that look. Problem that your brother chainsawed a vampire's head off

Melon: Dean at peak is covered in blood, holding a shotgun chainsaw, and in full cowboy outfit Kayla: sharknado 6 Melon: I mean we were all thinking it Crepe: I wasn't

Cmon Sam. Its about the murder and blood spatters. Get down with it

Kayla: sharknado but everything is the same except dean is fin Melon: That really changes nothing besides that the wife would be a dude instead Kayla: cas Melon: That’s what I said

[ They then discuss something about Cas that I apparently won't understand for like 8 and a half more seasons. C'mon guys, I haven't even met the guy yet. ]

What is going on over drinks here

Oh. So a vampire killed this guy's sister. :(

Right makes sense as hunter backstory

Dean finally admitting somethin abt how he feels abt their dad passing. And its to some guy they JUST MET INSTEAD OF HIS BROTHER

[ Melon says it's because it's easier to admit to a stranger than someone you know. Kayla adds that he has to be strong for Sam. Ah, yes, the constipated older brother syndrome. I get it. ]

I don't think this hunter guy is handling his emotions well gonna say

Gordon Walker? That's his name? K

Oh ok so this guy's just fuckin nuts. Got it.

[ They now discuss telling strangers about trauma with no warning. They come to the conclusion that this is just Tumblr. ]

"Yknow what I love about this life? It's all black and white." Hmmmmmmmm

Yeah this guy's more than a bit off his rocker and you both should leave!

Uh oh Sammy

Why does Sam keep getting stalked and/or jumped by shit huh

Don't breathe a sufg of relief you idiot

[ I meant to type "sigh", not whatever happened there. Add that to the list of Ink typos. ]

Oh look! Vampire! Of course

VEGAN VAMPIRES?

[ Crepe goes on a tangent about said Vegan Vampires, of which I follow maybe half of. ]

Ohhhh cattle blood. Funky

Vegan Vampires just living their lives I guess. Good for them! Unfortunately Sam and Gordon won't listen to him probably

Dean is too murder happy and Sam is not quite murder happy enough and they yell at each other about it

[ Apparently, they say, this is the plot of season 10. What the hell does that mean. ]

HE STOLE THE CAR!! THEY HAVE TO HOTWIRE THEIR OWN CAR!!!

*keys not the car

Somethin about this chick's delivery. Weird. Not like in a suspicious way just in a What is this Acting way

Sam and his sad, sad eyebrow scrunch

Eww stabby

Gordon u got issues homie

Weird fuckin guy. Weeeird fuckin guy.

Shes trying her best leave her alone

Hunter fight! Hunter fight! Get his ass Dean!

WHSHSHSH screaming. Dean telling Sam to punch him. Bc he was a dick.

[ Kayla and Crepe both say they're going to bed, not even waiting 3 minutes for me to finish the episode. Rude. ]

DEAN ADMITTED THEIR DAD WASN'T PERFECT!!! HOLY SHIT!!!

Man now they have to deal with more Moral Quandries. Have fun with that boys!

And away they go. Into the sunrise.

---

I cannot emphasize enough how much I was not paying attention to whatever the hell my friends were talking about in the moment. Absolutely wild to go back and read all that. What the fuck are they on about

Anyways. Vegan Vampires I guess! That's a thing! Wild.

#on the highway to superhell #supernatural #spn #i hope you guys enjoy the comedy of whatever the hell my friends are talking about #continuing to mess with formatting as i go #i hope to get in at least one more ep tomorrow

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moderndaybrando · 6 days

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I was prescribed Ativan almost two weeks ago. I’m supposed to be weening off of it, but I struggle to sleep now, in a way that’s different to how my previous sleep issues were. Anyways, I have a flight later (it’s 1:10 AM rn) and I didn’t want to sit in bed and toss and turn, so I took another one. But now I’m in bed and already tired, so I took it for no reason. Anyways. It numbs me out. Makes me feel lethargic and just very unfazed and unmoved by anything happening around me. I feel like a ghost, a passenger. It mutes my experience of the world, but gosh it helps me sleep. I kind of like how I don’t react on it (like, I’m so stress free) but not in a good, level headed way. In a “I literally cannot care” type of way. It mutes everything. As well as my personality. Anyways. I’m gonna have to stop taking it soon, anyways. Cause I kinda hate how they make me, and I only have two left… but I’m also a bit worried cause I know it’s going to be hard. The sound effects are so apparent. Like, they’re so obvious. I’m so aware of them. Wish me luck. I want to be serious about developing better habits and not relying on substances, from here on out. Like I said, I know it will not be easy, but I need to be clear, and completely and soberly me, for this next chapter in my life. I mean.. at least to the best of my abilities. I sound like I don’t have much confidence in myself (with regard to this) rn, but honestly, I think I’m just a tad scared… this stuff makes my emotions and my mind so raw, when I’m off of it. I cannot sleep when I’m off of it, too. And my head feels like a wild storm. My spirit feels like a raw and exposed wound, with its flesh being picked at. I don’t know whether my feelings are true, or drug induced. The good and the bad ones. I get so scared when my good feelings are drug induced. They feel like that glimmer of hope you get at night time, that suddenly vanishes when you wake up the next day, and it feels hard to get out of bed again.. I hope it isn’t the case. Something needs to change. Something has seriously got to give. I have got to give myself the life I deserve, and become the person I want to be. God speed.

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aster-pkmn-irl-real · 7 months

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DREAMER - does your muse have any recurring dream? if not, what was their worst nightmare?

And!

CHEATING DEATH - what does your muse think about death? are they afraid of it?

oh ummmm that first one is kind of like. hard to answer cause i actually don't sleep that much tbh,,, it isnt a thing where i just refuse to sleep or like im overworking myself i grew outta that phase but like i havent been able to sleep properly at all for as long as i can remember (ALSO YES IVE TRIED CUTTING OUT CAFFEINE IT DIDNT WORK) so i dont really dream thatttt much. but recently when ive managed to get to sleep ive had this dream where like. it reminds me of this one fairy tale (read: reading comprehension passage) i really liked when i was younger called marzia and the seven harlequins. i talk about it more here. (https://www.tumblr.com/aspens-lab-moved/740062909838884864/whats-a-book-that-features-your-favorite?source=share) but basically in the dream i take the role of marzia and eight other people (none of whom i recognize?? which is kinda weird) take the roles of her friends. but basically what happens is i turn like 13 in the dream and my pichu and i set out on this journey where basically we have to reset this timer in order to prevent the world from being destroyed by 'god.' so as we journey throughout the land over the course of 5 years we meet these people and we become friends and they join my cause. along the way my pichu also eventually evolves into a raichu. what happens is like basically each of these eight friends start to go missing one by one, until theres only me, my raichu, and one last friend left with his raichu. and the two of us keep going on our journey to reset the timer and stop god from destroying the world and when we get to wherever we're supposed to be stopping god there's an altar at the very top of this tower which is on top of a mountain. when we find god, whos like just sitting on the altar having a good time ig, we realize that our friends went missing because every time we got closer he was taking them as sacrifices to make him stronger. then he takes my raichu and our last friend as the final sacrifices and its just me and this eevee left to reset the timer and make sure god doesnt destroy the world and basically like the eevee evolves into an umbreon and we're able to reset the timer and destroy god because he didnt realize that the timer doesnt function on sheer power but its cause like love and hope and devotion are how it chooses its master so its reset but in the process the umbreon and i are killed, but we wake up to this really bright light, where we're meant to spend all of eternity together all alone because we're dead and we have to watch over the timer now in order to reset it next time and next time and next time because that way nothing changes and the timer can always be guaranteed to be reset and then i start crying in the dream and then i wake up its a weird fuckin dream and then for the second one . its kind complicated ig. im not going into detail for kind of obvious but i do have a few experiences regarding death and stuff and they definitely had an effect on me. i wouldn't say i necessarily fear death. i don't want to die but at the same time if i were to be killed i wouldn't try to fight all that hard yk? like if it happens it happens. theres not a whole lot i can do about that. im going to die anyway. all i can really do is love the people i love while i can and hope that when i say i love them they know i mean it and try to live a life that i won't regret when my time comes. and i dont really mean that in a yolo way but i moreso just wanna like. pay attention to my life and the world around me and i wanna pay attention to what i pay attention to. i dont want to die but if it happens i dont want to waste time trying to cling to life when i could be doing something better with my time

#pokeblogging #pkmn irl #rotumblr #rotomblr #aspen replies #tw death #tw nightmares

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starshipsofstarlord · 3 years

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Could I request a Bucky Barnes x reader smut? Basically she and Bucky have been together for some time and maybe it’d be a little angst where the two are talking about the future and Bucky not thinking he can ever have a normal future? Which would result in soft smut and later reader being revealed as pregnant so Bucky finally gets his family

I’m Home

Pairing | Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary | based on the request ^^

Warnings | angst, smut, oral sex (m receiving), fluff, pregnancy, mentions of death

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

The Wilson’s boat rocked sturdily upon the water, swaying as the boats worked aboard. Your hand held the weight of a silver spanner, twirling it in your fist as though it were a knife, thinking of the long road ahead of you. Sam had the shield now, that was a good start, but still, there was a ways to go until the world recognised him as the captain that he was meant to be.

There was so much destruction ongoing in the world, what with the flag smashers, and whomever the power broker was, and surely, you knew on the shallow surface, that there would be masses more problems to arise. It was exhausting, to know that there was no end to the war on earth, and that you were surely going to be fighting the threats until you could no more.

Bucky felt the same; he had just gone from one war to another, losing everyone that he cared about along the way. Steve had given everything up to finally find peace, and yet, the two did not share the same opportunity. An escape was never laid at your feet, instead, the pair of you were trapped in the cycle of cruelty, being blended around in a shredder by reality.

“Hey.” A voice confiscated you from the lonesome containment of your thoughts; it was Sam’s hosting sister, Sarah. I’m her own way, though you doubted that she would never admit such a thing, she was a hero. She had become a widow, and not to mention she remained a stable mother to keep her boys afloat, as well as nurturing half the kids that lived within close proximity.

“Hi Sarah.” You put the tool down, giving her your ample attention as you stood, tugging your fingers into the loops of your jeans as you stepped out of the boat, and onto the dock. “Anything I can help with?” It hadn’t passed your attention that Sam and Bucky had disappeared, but not into ash like last time. Instead, they had walked off in the direction of the house, most likely meddling about with a ball, in the back yard with Jim and Jody.

“I just came to let you know I’ve made the sofa up for you and Bucky. Are you sure you’ll be all good, I could always kick Sam outta his bed and make him sleep on the living room floor?” The two of you had nightmares, if you were to be separated from him for even a night, it was certain that the pair of you would greatly suffer. That was something you didn’t want to burden any of the Wilson’s with, screaming in the middle of the night because flashes from your past struck an unconscious nerve.

“All good, and thank you Sarah. You didn’t have to let us stay here, we both appreciate it, a hell of a lot.” One thing that you had learnt throughout your years was to show gratitude. The smallest amount shared had the ability to spring up moods, and had even set you on a much more heroic path than the one that you had been originally been placed upon.

“You’ve earned your stay.” Sam’s sister shrugged with modesty, acknowledging the help that you and Bucky had not only given to Sam, but to her family’s legacy. The two of you had aided with fixing the old wreckage that had now returned to the form of a boat, keeping it afloat rather than permitting it to sink from the quarrels that Sam had with himself regarding fixing the damned yet meaningful port of transport.

“This life you have, it’s great. I get it’s not easy, but it’s beautiful. You have two wonderful kids, that you’ve done such a great job raising, and not to mention, these community that you have is so loving and kind, even to us outsiders.” The pair of you had paused outside of her front door, speaking. “Sam is lucky to have you, he truly is.”

“Well, maybe one day this life could be something similar to what you’ll have.” The sister of your friend smiled, though your mirroring expression retracted. In a stumble of thought, you shook your head, not believing that possibility. This all was... perfect. That was something that you had never had, nor would you think that you’d ever be permitted such a peaceful lifestyle.

“I don’t think that would work out.” You sincerely mumbled, feeling the sad swelling in your chest at the prospect of all the luxuries that life had denied both you and Bucky of. It wasn’t fair all the same, but the two of you were used to being denied human rights, let alone the simplicity of nothing more than a life together. “As nice as it sounds, me and Buck aren’t really cut out for all this I suppose.”

“The world does not choose who can and cannot have a family, there’s always a way. Just because you haven’t had the most ideal line of story does not at all mean that you can’t make it work, from as much as i know, you two deserve a life together, that doesn’t include being shot at, or shooting at other people. Sometimes, you’ve just gotta go for it, and hope for the best.” She gave you a final nod, before heading inside, and you trailed after her into her her residency.

The two of you went your separate ways, and there, you saw Bucky, sat up on the sofa, his hands clasped together as his eyes stared towards the tan bag, that concealed not the shape, but the Stars and Stripes of the infamous shield. It was much a relief that it was no longer in Walker’s toxic clutch, however its presence, among other things, were taking a clear toll on your boyfriend.

“You ever feel like we’re stuck?” The air was tense around you both as he spoke solemnly, it diverting to match the mood of his question. “Like we’re us, and I love us, but it makes me think that it’s it. Just me and you, on this path for the rest of our lives, never getting a compensated break, nor an average person’s future. I want this, what these people here have, not the combat that is aided by this metal arm, or the associations that stick to us like life lines.”

“All the time, it’s on my mind James.” With a sigh, you came to sit beside him on the couch, resting your head against his bionic shoulder. “I ever wonder if there’s a timeline of you and me where there’s none of this ruckus, we just have a nice little house in a quiet and accepting place, and maybe a kid or two in the future.”

“I’d give anything up for that.” He looked at you, almost wide eyed, as his hand slithered down onto your knee cap, rubbing small circles as he wore a blunt and endearing smile upon his infatuating lips. “I mean that Buck, that sounds...”

“Perfect?” He asked, leaning closer as he grabs your chin with his wondrous fingers, his nose brushing alongside your own as his puckered lips fell upon yours, earning a small hun of content from within you. “Because you’re perfect to me, and no matter what life we are encased in, I want to share it with you. I want stare at the night sky and watch the moonlight illuminate the side of your face, and the stars reflect in your entrapping eyes, that I want to look into like a medium’s orbs forever, because that is how I will see the future that I ever so hope for.”

“How long have you been working on that one Barnes, because you are usually not that smooth?” A small laugh erupted from your mouth, but you were quickly silenced as you felt a cold metal hand slither up and beneath the back of your tank top, rubbing along the seam of your spine, as his lips ran down the column of your throat, evoking small and delicate whimpers out of you.

“Shut up doll, because I really want to fuck you now, and those words leaving your mouth are making it kinda hard to concentrate.” A furrow imbedded between his brows, as you tilted your head at him, a smirk proclaiming your expression as you pulled the material over your head, and reached behind yourself to unclip the back of your bra.

“Kinda hard to concentrate, hun?” You asked nonchalantly as his gaze zeroed in on your bare breasts, his hands smoothing along your ribcage as he adjusted his grip of you so that he was palming at your breasts, and squeezing the nipples. “I want you in me baby, I’ve practically gone days without you inside of me.” Licking your lips, you reached down to palm your beloved through his layers, earning a positive groan from the former assassin.

“Hours, you mean. I fingered you on the road trip here.” Yes, that was true, however, it was only his fingers, not even the metal ones, and whilst you loved what they alone could do, he had to be discreet as you were sat on the back of the truck, which had carried the primary parts for the Wilson’s family boat. If you were to scream out, they’d have surely thought that you’d fallen off the back of the truck and pull over, or if they had much sense, they’d have noticed that there was more going on than two passengers sat side by side on the journey to their small neighbourhood by the docks,

“You heard me Barnes, otherwise I’m sure Sam wouldn’t have any problem if I came to his room in this state of undress that I am currently portraying.” Growling was never Bucky’s fortes, however the sound aggressively ripped through the tunnel of his throat, as he threw off his grey top, quickly unfastening his belt, as he awaited for you to strip the rest of your clothing before him.

But rather than doing so, as he stood before you, your hand had trouble resisting the sight of his cock that had bobbed to attention, and thus, you wrapped it around his toned flesh, giving it a couple jerks that had his head reeling back, before you tongued his tip, moaning to yourself at the taste of him invading your sensitive taste buds. “Love your cock.”

As soon as you said that, Bucky gently gathered your head in a ponytail so that it was free from bombarding your face, and groaned as quiet as he could as you sucked him in your mouth, running your tongue up the side of his shaft. “Is that a part of your dream world baby doll, the sight of my cock throbbing to be inching down that perfect little throat of yours?”

To answer him, you pressed your head down deeper, humming around him as your eyes ogled up at the sight of your super soldier, who was trying his hardest to keep his eyes open, and attuned to the sight of you. He held his bottom lip between his teeth, as you lightly gagged around him, pulling off him, and squeezing his balls, before running your hungry tongue along the middle of his sack.

“Always. It would be a dream if you made love to me right here and now though, I’m not sure I can wait any longer James.” Bucky took a long inhale, before ravishingly pulling down your jeans and panties in one go, and tossing you so that he was below your form, and you hovered over him, toying with his erect cock. “I love you so much Bucky, and I’m scared of what’s to come. I have a feeling that there’s gonna be a fight.”

“There’s always a fight doll face.” He rubbed his thumb soothingly across your jaw, pulling your hips down closer so that you were rubbing your slick folds against his standing cock. “But this is what we’re fighting for, the rest of our lives together. I’d be damned, one day after this, and if I were to die, I’d be a happy man. There’d be the memory of you to keep me forever happy in the afterlife, and not to mention, there’d be no more wars for me to participate in.”

“I’m not going to let you die Buck, even hypothetically. We saw how your little hypothetical synopsis went last time.” Tapping his cock against your clit, a breathy sound evicted from your lips, as you stared down at the two of you intimately touching, the sight alone making you more turned on and impatient. “No one is allowed to kill you, otherwise I’ll unleash hell on all their flag smashing asses.”

Giving him one last stroke, you guided his tip towards your entrance, removing your hand once you had him situated, so that you could rest it upon his sturdy shoulder, and sink down on him, the feeling of him stretching you being the most euphoric sensation that you had ever endured. Hushed moans ceased from the both of you, as Bucky’s hands gripped your ass cheeks, only adding to all of the pleasure that was erupting within you.

“Think your pussy is gonna kill me before anyone else does; your so tight.” His pitch had rose, as your fingertips danced along the left side of his handsome face, invisibly connecting the dots of his beauty marks. You allowed the pair of you to adjust for a simple moment, before you began to raise your hips, sliding up his super soldier rod, only to slide down it again.

The actions were repeated, as your own hands trailed down his warm skin, to drag down the golden lines of his vibranium arm, only to bring the weapon to your mouth, and kiss every black finger up, as you tried your best to muffle the moans that were hoping to reap free. “So fucking big, I love you and your cock.” You muttered, your sight turning blurry as Bucky realised that it was his turn to do the work, and thus, he thrusted up into you, making echoing sounds of your skin slapping together reverberate around the room.

“Love you more.” He gritted his teeth, pulling his metallic hand away from your numb lips, so that he could swirl the elegant digits around your clit, the action provoking whimpers to rapidly surpass your exterior, as you bit harshly onto your own lip, and screwed your eyes shut. “Cum for me doll, want you to cover my hard cock in everything you have. Come on baby, you can do it.”

Without much thought, as your mind was too scrambled to do so, you reached for Bucky’s spare hand, pulling it to your mouth as you sucked on his fingers as though you were blowing him. A low moan that was dialled down from the presence of his flesh digits, ran from your mouth, as you began to bounce your hips, chasing and eventually reaching your high. You came around him, pushing him too over the edge, his seed filling your walls, as you collapsed atop of him, huffing from exhaustion as you removed his salivated hand from the realms of your mouth, resting your head against his panting chest.

Stringed sighs fell from Bucky’s breath as he tried to catch his own breath. His hands rubbed your back, not only to comfort you, but also to subconsciously pull you closer against him, and his softening cock that was still inside you, and was keeping his cum plugged within your tender and pulsating walls. If life was easier, there’d be more time for this, and that, but for now, it was just every now and then. Maybe you’d win this fight and survive until the next one, but maybe, you’d lose and never battle again.

Life was precious, that was something that you had not only learned as an avenger, but also something that had been told to you by Isiah. That man thought that you deserved a normal life, no fighting, no super soldiers. He himself was the biggest yet silent critic of those with additional strength, but his opinion was never going to sway you, not as you stared out into Sarah’s backyard, and watched the man that you loved play with the boys.

They had the shield, and were whisking it through the air like a frisbee; dangerous, yes, but again, life could only amount to so much without an ounce of pain. A content and satisfied smile absorbed any pain on your face, you were enraptured with the sight of Bucky like this, he was like an uncle to these two kids. He was no captain America, that was for sure, but you didn’t want a man in Stars and Stripes, all you wanted was him to be at peace, and it was a fact unbeknownst to him, that you had made such an alternative to that.

“Still want all this?” Sarah emerged, a cheap yet formidable bottle of wine pursed in her hand, as she held two clear and tall glasses in her hand. You hummed, watching as she poured the thin red consistency into one glass, but as she went to fill the other, you held out your hand, shaking your head. The woman was confused, last time you had visited, and were entangled on her sofa with the limbs of your boyfriend and a shaggy old blanket, you had kindly accepted her offer.

“Sure do.” You sighed, staring out into the green abyss where Jim was hanging from Bucky’s arm like it were a branch. “How do you do this, this whole mother thing? I’ve never been able to wrap my head around how you make it look so easy, it’s just, you do such a good job.” Your palms rested flat on your thighs as you laughed at Sam ordering Jody to jump on Bucky’s back, as he fell down in faux defeat.

“It never is easy y/n.” She placed the open bottle down, along with the mismatched glasses, that were asymmetrical considering one was half filled and the other wallowed in emptiness. “But every step of difficulty is worth it. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss their father, but they’re my priority. For Jim and Jody, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do, and you’d understand that if you ever opened yourself up to giving your life of heroism up to have all this.”

“I might have to.” Twiddling with your fingers, glancing up at your boyfriend, realising that he was in fact not looking over, you clasped your intwined hands over your stomach, smiling softly to yourself. “And maybe not having another option is the best option for me and Buck, because we don’t have to fight with ourselves over being included in our duties, we have new ones.”

“You’re pregnant, aren’t you?” Sarah asked, resting her nurturing hand upon the tile of your shoulder, prompting you to turn your face towards her. There was a conflict in your eyes, it was something that she recognised her younger self having once worn. It was the idea of putting everything aside, all for a child, everything that she had ever known, so that she could put her baby boy first. “Does Bucky know?”

“He will.” You shifted your head down, unsure of yourself. This had been what you had wanted, and whilst you still envied Sarah for the role she had, you were hurt. A part of you wanted to be an avenger until you were nothing but a soul drifting in the abyss of non existence, another didn’t want to let the knowledge of being a carrier for a new future crumble you. “I just need a moment to tell him.”

“I’ve got it.” She sent you a wink, picking up the items she had brought out, before she called on Sam and the kids to come inside. Sarah had gifted you the opportunity of revealing the truth to your partner with no one else around; you appreciated that. As he stalked closer, you met him halfway, sinking into his arms as he hugged you.

“Looked like you were having fun with the boys.” You verbally noted, loving the feeling of him running his fingers through your hair. “You’re amazing Bucky Barnes, to me and to everyone. I just, don’t want you to freak out on me, I have something big, really big, to tell you, and-“

“Baby, I know.” He smiled, pulling back so that he could look you in the face. “I have super human senses, I heard their little heart beat for the first time yesterday. We’re having a baby, and I couldn’t be happier about it. In fact, I want to ask you if you’ll accept my question of making Sam the godfather.” You nodded, tears standing in your eyes, as you brought the man down for a kiss.

“Yes. But I’m not sure that he’ll be praising us for making a baby when we technically created him or her on the couch inside.” Bucky shook his head at you, kissing your forehead before walking inside with you, preparing to tell the Wilson family, that had along the way became your own, the good news- well, not the sofa bit.

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yoichichi · 3 years

Text

Aftercare HCs

captains x reader

warning(s): none - purely sweetness :)

a/n: there is some NSFW ~themes since its y’know after sex but nothing explicit or more intense than I’d say PG-13 LOL but yeah anyways - ty for requesting and as always I’d love to hear people’s thoughts! <3

characters: daichi, oikawa, bokuto, kuroo, kita, & ushijima

Daichi

He always lets you lay on his chest while you both catch your breath, and gives you a few moments before he asks how you’re feeling. He’s big on being vocal with you after to make sure you’re in a good headspace and usually ends up chatting about stuff with you mindlessly while he’s rubbing your back until you fall asleep. He tends to talk about his upcoming plans and things he’s dreading in the week to come while his low voice just lulls you to sleep. Also always has a glass of water for you after hehehehehe

Oikawa

Ok he gets very emotional afterwards. He’s not super transparent with his feelings always, but there’s something about that moment after you two just finished and your breathing heavy that it always hits him how much you mean to him. He’s very cuddly and attentive, making sure he’s doing anything he can to attend to your needs, but afterwards he just wants to be close with you. He really appreciates it if you play with his hair and let him rest his head on your chest. It’s also not unusual for him to tear up a little while he caresses your face and mutters how much you mean to him. what a little baby <3

Bokuto

I’m so sorry but it’s so hard for him to stay awake after :(((. Baby is holding you so tight against him in a bone crushing grasp and is out within 3 minutes. He just gets so clingy and feels so emotionally vulnerable and close to you after that he doesn’t want you anywhere but in his arms. He’ll try to stay up with you if you’re up after but he just can’t mans always putting in work too ok the only coherent thing you can get out of him after is usually a string of, “I love you”s and all kinds of compliments. But like I said he’s very sleepy so sometimes they don’t always make sense, “yer s’good at drivin babe.” Then he’s out. A little bit of a drooler which means it’s not uncommon for you to wake up with some of his drool on your shoulder or in your neck since he loves to bury his face there, too. Really just a big big teddy bear :,(.

Kuroo

Snack drawer? Snack drawer. He has a little snack drawer in the nightstand at his bedside that is optimal for after sex - he also has your faves stocked if you’re a big snacker too (regardless of whether or not it’s for after sex). I feel like he also loves to talk like Daichi but it ends up being more silly. The usual scene is him leaning up against his headboard shirtless while he rants about something he heard the other day that he forgot to mention to you. Also loves feeding you snacks while he talks, all you have to do is open your mouth and make a little noise and he knows what’s going down. Regarding snacks he specifically loves any kinda sour candy after - it’s actually kinda cute the way he scrunches his face up after he pops a war head into his mouth while you update him on your most recent friend drama, and he’s doing his best to hum along and act like the sourness isn’t affecting him.

Kita

So so so so so many light kisses. As soon as you guys come down from your highs he’s kissing your temple, the top of your head, your cheek, any bit of your face he can reach he’s leaving the most gentle kisses there. Same with your shoulders and back - any exposed skin he can get at really. If you giggle or groan he’s giggling and pulling away so he can get some stuff to clean the two of you up. His favorite is being able to shower with you after if you’re down, if not he does still shower on his own. If he comes back to find you asleep he just cuddles into you instead of moving you into his side so he doesn’t disturb you. Also has water ready for you after, a hydrated king.

Ushijima

Oh he’s literally such a softie. He’s immediately carrying you - it does not matter how big you are he’s doing it, he’ll be damned if you walk - to the bathroom so he can clean both of you up. And you bet your ass he’s gonna be carrying you back to bed so he can then go to the kitchen and get you anything you need. I don’t see him as someone who is super sleepy after so he’ll probably cuddle you on the couch (he doesn’t have a TV in his room cause he says watching TV in bed isn’t good for your sleep schedule and brain or whatever) and put something on that either the two of you can watch together or something to mindlessly play while you fall asleep in his arms. Even though he just ends up falling asleep with you most of the time anyways hehehehe

love you guys! Hope you enjoyed and I love love love hearing ur thoughts! And if you’d like to be added to my taglist jus lemme know :)

requests are open

-🐇out

taglist: @plutowrites @sweet-darling91

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moonctzeny · 4 years

Text

Baby

au+trope+prompt game: college!au Jaehyun + fake dating + it’s just so hard not to fall in love with you

pairing: jung jaehyun x fem!reader x asshole!yuta

other members as background characters: yuta, mark, johnny, jungwoo

genre: angst, smut

word count: 9,124

warnings: abusive relationship, toxic behaviour

summary: “When Yuta breaks your heart for the millionth time, you meet Jaehyun, freshly broken up and looking for revenge. You decide to start fake dating to get back on your exes, but your plan takes an unexpected turn. You fall in love.”

a/n: I really don’t like putting yuta in a negative light like that it’s just for the fic’s sake! also I literally used the name Naeun as Jaehyun’s ex because I think it’s SUCH a pretty name, NO correlation whatsoever to any korean celebrity named naeun!

_____________________________________

You knew it was wrong.

Looking through your boyfriend’s, Yuta’s, phone while he took a shower, was the arguably the tackiest thing you have ever done.

He was always distant lately, only seeming to make time for a booty call, and at first, you blamed your hectic schedule. Your major was demanding, to say the least, so when Yuta suggested that you replace your dates with some “quality time” at his dorm, you had no objections. You didn’t know that he also meant ignoring your calls, canceling on you at the last minute to meet up with his frat brothers, and keeping your relationship strictly between four walls and two naked bodies.

The thought of him meaning more to you than you meant for him ate you away. It creeped in your mind while you heard the water running from your shower, and lead your fingertips to tap in the password of his phone.

Opening his messaging app, you recognize his best friends’ icons in a group chat consisting of his frat members. You scrolled up, ignoring the latest massages regarding a party that the frat would be throwing in two weeks. You started to feel guilty, not exactly sure what you were looking for, when you saw your name at the screen.

m0rklee[00:10]: @yutassanhyung, i saw your girl today at the supermarket! why didn’t you tell her about the party next Sunday?

you[00:12]: what girl lol

m0rklee[00:13]: y/n?? i thought you guys were together?

you[00:12]: nahh

fairyteil[00:15]: eyy @yutassan if you’re done with her i know a couple guys who wanna hit it too

you[00:16]: be my guest haha

you[00:16]: don’t get me wrong she was bad when we met but shit is getting kinda stale

tenoutoften[00:17]: aren’t you on your way to her place lol

you[00:17]: hey hey pussy is pussy

Was that all you were to him? Pussy?

Yuta called you special, he called you yours. He didn’t like it when you were talking to other guys. He ripped your lingerie set because he didn’t want anyone else to ever see you in it but him. And then he dared to go around and call you a fling?

You heard the water stop running and knew you didn’t have much time until you had to face him, the thought alone making you sick.

You didn’t bother to lock his phone again, leaving the chat that made you so upset open. Grabbing your keys and a jacket, you left your place and hoped that Yuta would get the message and get the fuck out of there before you came back.

Your legs walked on their own accord, your memory leading you to the only place where you knew you’d find any sort of comfort. When Johnny opened his door, tears were already streaming down your face. He took the open tequila bottle you were holding and pulled you in for a hug. He smelled like weed and beer, and after hearing the “Is that the pizzas?”, you realized that your best friend wasn’t alone.

You quickly wiped your cheeks and fixed your sex hair that Yuta messed up, trying your best to look presentable. Johnny put a hand on your back and lead you to his living room. Jungwoo, your and Johnny’s friend from high school, was sprawled out on the couch, a little disappointed after seeing that you were, in fact, not the pizzas. Next to him, drowning in a bean bag, was Jaehyun. You didn’t really know him very well other than the fact that he took the same major as Johnny, so you felt a little insecure looking as messy as you did right now. His eyes were red, just like the other men’s, but you could swear his eyelashes looked a little damp.

Jungwoo’s words were muffled by the barbecue chips he was munching away.

“Yoo y/n, I didn’t know you were coming!”

You placed the tequila bottle on the table,

“Yeah, Woo, figured you wanted something to drink”

“Move” Johnny murmured to him, but he only stretched and sighed dramatically, shoving a handful of chips in his mouth.

“I don’t need a drink I need food. I’m hungry and I got the munchies”

Johnny grabbed his ankle and with impressive ease, dragged Jungwoo to the floor. The taller man sat on the couch, on the side next to Jaehyun and you followed his lead, letting a grumpy Jungwoo lean his head on your knees. Taking the lit joint from Jaehyun’s fingers, Johnny turned his attention back on you.

“So tell me chica” he said and took a hit, “who do I have to beat up?”

“Yuta”, you grumbled, “I’m ghosting this motherfucker”

You felt the vibrations on your lap when Jungwoo started talking.

“What did he do this time? Didn’t I tell you not to get involved with stupid frat boys?”

You started petting his hair, the softness comforting under your fingers.

“Apparently I’m not ‘bad’ enough for him anymore” you replied, throwing air quotes and rolling your eyes.

“Whaaaaat” Johnny drew out with a cough after taking a particularly deep inhale from the blunt, “you’re like the baddest bitch I know. Even now, that you’re all puffy from crying and smell like his dick”

You hit his shoulder, almost dropping the joint he was passing to Jungwoo, embarrassed that he would say something like that in front of Jaehyun, an almost stranger to you.

“I don’t know, man” Jungwoo started, and you could hear the smile on his face, “when girls cry it’s kinda hot”

You were contemplating how many hairs of his you should rip out of his scalp when the telecom rang, assumably by the pizza delivery man.

“Saved by the bell”, Jungwoo muttered to himself and got up quickly to open the door. While the youngest paid for the pizzas, Johnny held your hand, a bit guilty for his words earlier. He had a mischievous smirk and kept shifting his gaze between you and Jaehyun, who had been sitting in silence ever since you got here, occasionally smiling at your friends’ teasing.

“Fuck Yuta, man. You should find a nice guy to treat you well and fuck you even better y’know?” he started, and patted his buddy roughly on the back, “Like Jae over here”

Your eyes widened and you instinctively glanced at Jaehyun, ears a deep red and a matching shocked look on his face.

You cleared your throat, “No offense, but, like, aren’t you practically married to this girl-uhhh what’s her name again? Naeun?”

To someone who wasn’t listening to your conversation, it must have seemed like you tased him, or brought up a painful childhood memory, or asked him if he’d be willing to lick a lemon after washing his teeth. He looked away from you, and turned his attention to his nails, ripping a cuticle off in deep concentration. His voice was so quiet when he finally spoke, that you barely heard him. “I broke up with her, actually.. Like, three hours ago”

Guilt washed over you in an instant, not knowing that you scratched a wound so fresh. You wanted to apologize and even ask if you should leave the three alone, when Jungwoo grabbed the Tequila bottle and crashed on the couch clumsily between you and Johnny.

“Fuck love!”, he yelled, “let’s get wasted”

_______________________________________

You stared at the empty José Cuervo bottle rising up and down Johnny’s chest with every one of his snores. He was laid out on his couch, his tall height taking up all of its entirety, leaving Jungwoo passed out on the floor. Jaehyun followed your eyes and smiled at Johnny’s sleeping face, mouth open and tongue spilling out.

After the 4th shot, you found out that Jae was a pretty decent guy. He let you rant about Yuta while your friends were busy trying to see who could eat a large pizza by himself the fastest. You told him all about how you never went on dates anymore, how you looked through his phone after having sex, and the text conversation you found earlier tonight. He listened carefully, without judgment, and after smoking some more of Johnny’s staff, he opened up to you about his relationship with Naeun.

Or rather, how he found her fucking his roommate on his own bed.

You always thought of these two as what they call a ‘power couple’. Valedictorian meets basketball all-star, they graduate and have beautiful babies, while all the rest of us mortals can do is admire from afar. You would have never guessed the toxicity, constant cheating and manipulation that Jaehyun was recounting. You bonded over stories about cancelled dates, emotional distancing and feeling like you’re always the one giving but never receiving. If you were being honest, you would have never expected such emotional depth from a college point guard. He drew you in with his gentleness, and you noticed how different he was from Yuta, who engulfed you with his intensity. You also hated how even now, you were still thinking of him.

Just then, you got his third message for the night:

asshole [03:35]:come on baby don’t ignore mee, me and the guys were just messing around

you [03:36]:stop texting me

you [03:38]:we’re done

You locked your phone, upset and angry, and felt Jaehyun sigh.

“I know I’m falling for her stupid games, but I just want to get back at her y’know? Show her what she’s missing, that type of thing”

You knew exactly what he was talking about. During the past hours, you weighted all the possible ways you could make Yuta regret ever taking you for granted.

He was so charming that he could get laid with anyone he wanted (and probably did, even when you were ‘dating’), but even after what he said to Taeil, you knew that he hated the thought of anyone else fucking you. He wanted your body to be his, without having to deal with the commitment that came with that privilege.

You thought about fucking one of his frat buddies, but that would get you from being called ‘Yuta’s girl’ to ‘ΘΨΩ’s cumslut’, and your self esteem couldn’t take that blow.

Jaehyun’s deep voice interrupted your train of thoughts.

“Maybe Johnny’s right”

“Huh? ”

“You should date me”

You blinked at him twice, not knowing what to reply when you saw him wave his hands frantically in front of his face.

“Fake date me! I mean, you should fake date me. Sorry, the weed’s got me a little fucked up”

At first, the idea seemed crazy. Yes, it would make Yuta furious that you were supposedly fucking one of the hottest guys on campus. Yes, Naeun would get mad that she didn’t have Jaehyun’s constant attention that she so craved anymore. Yes, you two might have revealed your deepest insecurities, opened up your hearts to each other all while sharing a bottle of alcohol, but you had never hanged out together without Johnny being present. You had barely hanged out together, period. But wouldn’t that make it even more believable? Two of Johnny’s best friends break up at the same time, meet up at his house and inevitably end up together. You didn’t share the same major, so you wouldn’t have to put up the act too much at college. And with social media, making a fake relationship believable was easier than ever.

asshole [03:42]: fuck you. you think you can find someone better than me?

Drunk and lacking logic, you agreed on the plan, and gave him your number. You had just finished creating the contact on his phone when he suddenly got up and rushed to the bathroom, facing the consequences of the tequila and weed combo.

You passed out on Johnny’s bean bag and when you woke up on Sunday afternoon, Jaehyun was gone.

———————————————————

You didn’t expect him to text you on Monday, thinking that it was intoxication that gave him the idea of fake dating and made it look brilliant. So when he gave you the address to his dorm, to further discuss your ‘operation’ you were surprised, but determined to succeed.

The plan was simple. You would start tagging each other on your instagram stories, to show people that you were spending time alone. He agreed to pick you up from your lecture on Wednesday, your classes coinciding on neighboring buildings. And for you final act, he’d come with you as your plus one for the frat’s party next Sunday. Mark was nice enough to invite you, after Yuta ‘forgot’ to do it instead, and Naeun, being Taeil’s sister, wouldn’t miss it for the world. It was the perfect opportunity to flaunt your new relationship, all while being on the opponent’s part of the field.

You started off innocently enough. After you and Jaehyun finished brainstorming ideas about the ‘operation’ as he insisted on calling it, he suggested you stay for a movie and some Chinese food. His dorm was cozy, a little messy, maybe, but it fitted his boyish charm. He had a nice collection of vinyls, stating that his favorite one was I. by Cigarettes After Sex. You were a bit taken aback by his love for dreampop and rnb, but the more you got to know him, the more it seemed to fit him nicely. On the wall next to his bed hung a display full of all of his sport trophies. He was known for his basketball skills, but you also saw medals for soccer, track, volleyball. Amongst them all was an English certificate and a spelling bee award. You wondered if he ever felt pressure trying to be so perfect all the time.

The movie was terrible, but Jaehyun managed to entertain you by making silly jokes throughout and mocking the actors’ bad acting. It was the first time you ever saw him crack a joke like that and be willing to contort his handsome features. So much better than the dream boy image he was feigning for everyone, but you didn’t know him well enough to tell him. The movie was halfway done when he picked up his phone and opened a camera app through his Instagram.

“Shouldn’t we take a story? Since we’re together anyways?”

You nodded and scooted closer to him. He was a bit hesitant as he positioned the camera to capture your legs that were touching, a scene from the movie playing in the background. It was a cute picture but nothing indicated that the two of you were more than friends. You pressed the X at the top of the screen to discard the picture, and placed his hand on top of your thigh. You turned around just in time to witness his ears turning into a fuschia pink.

“Is that okay?”

He nodded and regained his cool, taking the picture and tagging you with a red heart next to your username.

A couple hours after leaving his place you texted him, asking if Naeun had replied to his story. He said that unfortunately, the only person who batted an eye was Johnny, replying with a “ 👀 👀 👀 “ .

———————————————————

You met up again the next day, at your apartment this time.

He looked nervous being in a place so foreign to him yet so personal to you, so you decided to turn the lights down to help him relax, insisting that you weren’t trying to seduce him or anything. He laughed at your joke but still looked tense, and you thought that maybe he needed some liquid courage to open up.

“Hey Jae. Want a drink?”

It took him 3 beers to finally loosen up and show you his dimpled grin again. You were sitting on the floor, facing each other and feeling comfortable in the ambience of the room. A Spotify playlist was playing in the background so it would fill up the awkward silence but wouldn’t distract you from your conversation.

“Wait wait wait. So you sleep without a pillowcase?”

“Yeah, didn’t you notice it when you came to my place yesterday?”

“I thought you forgot to do your laundry!”

His laugh was resonating and deep and manly. It made his eyes disappear and his face light up, not that it didn’t anyway - the guy could easily be a skin care ambassador, and you made a mental note to ask him about his moisturizer later.

You followed his gaze to one of your walls. Pictures were filling it up, memories of yourself and your siblings, of your friends from home that you missed, of Johnny and Jungwoo. You felt a little insecure then, comparing them to Jaehyun’s countless medals and awards.

“I’m not good at sports like you, so I have nothing else to hang on my wall”, you laughed awkwardly but he shook his head.

“No, I’m actually jealous of you. Everyone always seems to want to be around you”

“Except Yuta”

“Yuta’s an idiot, then. You are way out of his league anyways.”

You felt yourself turning into a blushing mess and looked for a way to break the awkward silence that followed his comment.

“Wanna share another one?” you asked him, shaking the empty beer bottle on your hand and he nodded. You started getting up when you felt him put a hand on your shoulder and pick up the bottles you had finished up from the table himself. He rinsed them off and put them away to the recycling bag next to your sink, the domesticity of the action making you melt. You watched as he stood on his tiptoes to reach a lager from the top drawer of your fridge, revealing a defined set of abs and two cute dimples on his lower back. You ripped your eyes away immediately, like you were caught doing something illegal, and he walked back to his spot next to you. As soon as he sat down, he groaned and threw his head back.

“The bottle opener was on the kitchen counter. I forgot to bring it”

Without saying a word, you took the beer from his hand and placed the cap in your mouth. It was a party trick that your older brother had taught you when you were 15. After finding a stable indentation on your teeth, you manipulate the rough edges of the cap and pop the beer open. You return the glass bottle to Jaehyun, who’s looking at you incredulously.

“Fuck me, that was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen”, he breaths out and you feel your whole face burning up. You opened and closed your mouth a couple times, trying to register that someone like him thought you were hot, when you felt your phone vibrating, saving you from further embarrassing yourself.

Johnny’s picture lit up on the screen and you mentally prepared yourself for the following conversation. You and Jaehyun decided against telling anyone about your relationship being fake. It’s not that your best friend wasn’t reliable, but if you told Johnny you had to tell Jungwoo, and Jungwoo doesn’t know how to keep his mouth shut to save his life.

“John, what’s up”

“Eyy chica what took you so long?”

You looked at Jaehyun who had leaned back against the pillow of your couch and sipped on the beer you would share.

“Yeah sorry I was a little busy”

“Busy.. with Jaehyun?”

You tried to sound as nonchalant as possible, but you were still trying to recover from the previous incident.

“Yeah, he’s here”

“Ohh I see, little y/n can’t get enough of Jae’s slam dunks.. I bet he’s teaching you the bank shot, the opening tip, the double dribble, the fast break, the palming.. he sure is great for a rebound-”

You interrupted him, growing tired of his nonstop basketball innuendos.

“Why did you call me Johnny?”

“Damn, sorry, I just wanted to ask you what you wanted for your birthday”

Shit, you forgot about that.

“Just get me whatever, I don’t care, you know how much I hate celebrating anyways. I’ll get the cake myself, so no surprises”

Jaehyun lifted his brows and waited patiently for your call to end before asking:

“What are we celebrating?”

“It’s my birthday on Friday. I’m going to invite a couple people over and Johnny’s already stressing over it. Don’t worry, though, you don’t have to come”

“How can your boyfriend not come to your birthday party?”

You laugh bitterly.

“Well, it’s not like Yuta came last year. To any of my parties for that matter”

“Well, he must have made up to you somehow? Got you a very special gift or something?”

“If you count eating me out as a gift then yes. It was very rare indeed.”

You took the beer from him and took a sip yourself. You noticed he had his eyes glued on his phone, his expression gloomy.

“Is everything okay?”

He snapped out of it at the sound of your voice and turned his phone screen towards you.

It was Naeun, or rather a post on her instagram account. She had her tongue out in the picture, hugging two guys that were unfamiliar to you. You read the caption.

“One day the loser will realize that the diamond he thinks he’s playing with is actually a rock”

Jaehyun mumbled an apology. I guess he thought that you’d be a bit offended being called a ‘rock’ but you were actually feeling satisfied. Your fake relationship had managed to get her attention, and for Jaehyun’s sake, you wanted to rub it in her face even more.

You opened your camera app and placed your phone on the table next to you. He figured what you wanted to do so he sat up straighter and motioned to his lap. You’d normally be a bit hesitant to sit on him if it wasn’t for the two beers and your determination, that had fired up again due to Naeun’s words. Leaning back a bit, you set up the self-timer and he put his hands on your hips to stabilize you.

You had agreed on turning up the boldness of your pics, so you placed your hands on his neck, right under his jawline. He snaked his hands upwards and wrapped them around your waist, bringing you even closer. His eyes were glossy from the alcohol and he looked at you with an impressive calmness, considering the intimacy of your position. It seemed like he was waiting for something, the ticking of the timer urging you to take things a bit further and he nodded, as if giving you permission. You leaned in, and pressed your lips on the corner of his mouth, like you couldn’t decide on kissing his dimple or his lips.

After hearing the click you climbed down from his lap, and prayed that the photo came out in focus. Your heart couldn’t handle another retake. From the angle of the camera, it seemed like you were a couple in love, sharing a sweet kiss on the lips. You added a cute caption and tagged him, so he could repost it later on his own account.

It hadn’t been 5 minutes before your phone lit up.

yutassan replied to your story: what the fuck?

You smiled triumphantly and showed the message to Jaehyun, who laughed at Yuta’s reaction. He gave you an excuse about some forgotten homework and how it was late and he has to go.

“Remember, I’ll pick you up tomorrow from class, so wait for me”

After he left, you thought about your almost kiss and the dimples of his back for way too long.

——————————————————

You exited the classroom with a growing headache. The lesson today seemed extra boring, and all you could think about was that you had to convince Johnny that it really took just three days for Jaehyun and you to officially start dating.

As promised, the pair waited for you at the end of the hallway, your best friend looking at the two of you expectantly. Jaehyun was a good actor, you thought, as he approached you before you got to reach them, meeting you halfway.

“Hey baby”, he smiled at you, the nickname turning your legs into jelly. He wrapped one arm around your shoulder, and kissed your cheek sweetly, making Johnny coo at the two of you.

“I can’t believe that I hadn’t thought about pairing the two of you together earlier”

He must have thought that the awkward body language and the silence that fell was a sign from you and Jae to leave you alone. He excused himself, saying something about “letting the young lovers swim in the pool of their love”, or something along those lines.

The two of you walked together, following the road to your next class that was just a few buildings away.

“So how has class, baby

You rolled your eyes at the insistent nickname, “you know that Johnny left us, like, 5 minutes ago, right?”

“Let me enjoy itttt”, he whined, “Naeun never let me call her anything like that”

“Why is that?”

He looked at his feet moving and frowned in thought.

“She said I was embarrassing her in front of her friends. I think she just didn’t want other guys to know that we were together”

You felt a pang of sadness and you realized that it always followed any conversation you two had about his and Naeun’s relationship.

“Well then if you call me baby, I can will you honey. Or sugarplum. Or pumpkin pie. Or-“

It was startling how fast Jaehyun pressed you up against the wall. In just a moment, he had put his hands on your waist, burying his face in your hair. You shivered when you felt his breath as he spoke against your neck.

“Yuta’s watching us”

All you could do was stay frozen in place, and listen with wide eyes.

“Huh?”

He chuckled at your response, but he replied patiently.

“Yuta? Your ex? He’s right over there. Figured we should give him a show”

And with that, he kissed you. Everything was happening so fast, that you could barely comprehend that Jaehyun, that was a stranger in the past weekend, was now making out with you at the hall, for everyone to see.

And that included Yuta.

You opened your eyes in the kiss and searched for him, spotting him with his frat buddies. His eyes were piercing through the two of you, and you saw Mark holding him back by the shoulder. The look on his face was priceless.

Jaehyun pulled back and you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“Thank you”, you whispered, “but I need one more favor”

“Anything baby”

“Slap my ass as we walk away”

Sure enough, Jaehyun took your hand and you continue your walk, momentarily stopping to make eye contact with Yuta and give you a little spank. It was something your ex loved doing on the rare occasion you two met up outside of your dorms, no matter how public the setting. You heard Mark yelling something at his ‘Yuta hyung’ and that’s when you thought, your plan just might work.

———————————————————

You didn’t see Jaehyun until your birthday. It was just a small get together, but your place was starting to get a bit crowded as time went by. Johnny had been suffocating you with hugs ever since he got there, reminiscing the time you met as teenagers and calling you an old lady. Jungwoo on the other hand couldn’t stop asking about Jaehyun. You kept making excuses about how he didn’t feel so good today and might not make it. You didn’t expect him to come, of course. Just because you had agreed on fake dating, it didn’t mean that he had any obligation to be present in all your social events. The loving message he left on your Facebook wall was enough to fulfill the purpose of your current relationship.

That is why, when you heard a knock on your door, the last thing you thought you’d see was Jaehyun holding a dozen of red roses.

“Happy birthday baby!”, he exclaimed and gave you a kiss on your cheek,

“I asked Johnny about your favorite flowers, hope we got it right”

Feeling speechless, you took the roses from his hands and inhaled their sweet scent. You were dumbfounded that he actually came, and even brought you a present. You thanked him for coming, and he repeated the same thing he said back at your place, “how could your boyfriend miss your birthday?”

And even you were fooled, momentarily, when he held you by the waist later that night and sang you happy birthday. You blew your candles and all you could wish for was a love like the one Jaehyun was faking for you. He helped you clean up, and was more than willing to socialize with all of your friends. You admired how well he fitted in your social circle, already friends with Johnny and Jungwoo, yet so nice that even people he met for the first time came to love him.

You were sitting on one of your dining chairs, your two best friends already passed out on your couch. They had brought two bottles of vodka and your favorite tequila, but you weren’t in the mood to drink. You couldn’t help but remember the time when you practically begged Yuta to be there on your special day and he still missed it. You were scared that if you got a little drunk you would text him, or worse, call him, his sweet talk bringing you back to him all over again.

The only sounds resonating through your apartment were Jungwoo’s light snoring and a chill Spotify playlist playing from your laptop. A familiar tune came on, and you recognized it being ‘Nothing’s gonna hurt you baby’ by Cigarettes After Sex. You immediately looked at Jaehyun, the only conscious person still at the party other than you. He threw his head back and sighed contently at the sound of his favorite song. You saw him get up and walk over to you, reaching his hand out.

“Will the birthday girl spare me a dance?”

You slow danced in the middle of your living room, ending the night in the sweetest note. Jaehyun always felt so stable, so safe. You wondered how he got himself tangled up in that mess of a relationship with Naeun. Maybe it was the way he treated people with such kindness, void of any prejudice. Maybe he was a little bit like you, and didn’t think he deserved much.

“She’s crazy” you mumble against his chest, his confused hum making you feel the vibration on your face.

“Naeun. She’s crazy for ever cheating on someone like you. You’re perfect”

“I have my flaws”

You thought about how competitive he got when you played beer pong earlier, how his ears get red when he gets embarrassed, how he shows his dimpled smile in apology when he’s late. His love for drinking and how it makes him more honest, his trust in people that must have gotten him hurt many, many times. You liked them all, you loved them all.

“It’s just so hard for someone not to fall in love with you”

———————————————————

And that’s how the days went by with Jaehyun. You met up almost every day, in restaurants for a nice dinner, or hanging out in each other’s dorm. It was so much fun getting to spend time with him, that you sometimes forgot to make your meetup public on social media. You helped him with his math homework, and he helped you dye your hair. You even went to his basketball game, and he dedicated one of his goals to you, following every teen movie cliche.

You felt a little sad how it was all falling to an end. The plan was successful, for the most part. Naeun had asked Jaehyun to meet up later tonight, talk things through. You wished he wouldn’t go back to her, but you knew you had no real say in his love life. Yuta saw that he didn’t own you, that there were people like Jaehyun that were willing to give you what your ex had promised you, but wasn’t able to give. Well, not really, you reminded yourself. Jaehyun was faking it. You shouldn’t let yourself get lost in the fairytale, even if the past two weeks were some of the best of your life. He had proposed that you claim that the reason for your upcoming ‘breakup’ was differences in character, but you decided to stay friends. You were happy that at least, in the midst of all this mess, you met someone like him.

It was Saturday, a day before the frat party. You had invited him over, celebrate the end of your relationship with some pizza and a movie.

The movie was boring, but Jaehyun made you laugh. It reminded you of the first time the two of you met up alone. You had gotten comfy on your couch, sharing popcorn when you noticed. A huge bruise was peeking out from Jaehyun’s tank top, the dark color contrasting against his porcelain skin.

“What the hell?!” you exclaimed and scooted closer to him. You rushed your hands on his chest, your fingers pushing the fabric aside to examine the bruise. You found even more bruises scattered around it, accompanied with scratches that stretched longer than his top could.

“It was from the game the other day”, he tried to excuse, but you weren’t buying it.

“Jae, I was there. You played basketball, not WWE. Now who did this to you?”

He sighed and fidgeted with a loose string on his jeans, clearly uncomfortable.

“When I caught Naeun with my roommate, and broke up with her, she didn’t take it very well”

You kept staring at him, urging him to continue.

“She started calling me names, saying that she’s the best I’ll ever have. That I’m worthless without her, just a social climber trying to mooch off of her popularity”

He motioned on his torso, “When I kicked her out of my place, this happened”

“Is that the first time she acted violent?”

He shook his head. “Pretty much every time she didn’t get her way”

“Jae”, you started, placing your hands on top of his “this is abuse. Have you ever talked to anyone about it?”

“It’s- it’s nothing. It’s embarrassing”

“No it’s not! Abuse is not exclusive to any gender! Guys get affected by it too!”

“It’s embarrassing because I know I can physically stop her but I don’t”

His eyes were starting to water, the sight was heartbreaking. “I sit there frozen and just take it”

“Why?”

“Because part of me believes her. That I’m hopeless without someone like her, dictating what I can and cannot do. I don’t need a shrink to tell me that it’s sick. I have these bruises to remind me”

You were starting to get angry. Angry at that bitch for hurting him, angry at Jaehyun who puts up with it, angry at you, for not seeing past the obvious like everyone else.

“I’m not letting you go see her tonight”

He laughs at you, putting up an invisible barrier between you.

“Not letting me? Wake up y/n! We’re not a real couple, remember? We’re just faking it to satisfy our selfish needs. This whole thing is pointless”

He stormed to the door and you tried to stop him, but he was too riled up for that.

“You’re going to forget about me as soon as this whole circus is over, just like everyone else”

“How can you accuse me like that when you haven’t even let me be a part of your life for real?”

“Because now you’ve met me. Me. With all my ugly, all my fucking bruises. Is it still so hard not to fall in love with me?”

With that, he closed your door with a bang, not even letting you answer that yes, it was impossible not to fall in love with Jung Jaehyun.

———————————————————

History seemed to repeat itself, as you got a text from him the next morning, that you didn’t expect.

jaehyunnie: let’s meet outside of the frat at 10:30, i’ll bring the booze.

And that’s what you did, showing up with your shortest skirt, spotting Jaehyun sitting a few meters from the frat’s entrance. He was laying against the wall, his eyes red, and he gave you the same smile he always did when he saw you, as if your fight yesterday never happened.

“Hey baby” he said and pulled you in for a hug. You couldn’t resist the invitation, and felt yourself melting in his embrace. He smelled like weed and shower gel.

It was nice, how he proclaimed your truce, but you still had to get something off your chest.

“Listen, Jae, about last night, you were right. This whole thing is pointless. We can go home, if you want”

“No baby”, he started and pulled away just enough to look at you. His eyes were droopy but glancing back at you with such care as he moved a strand of hair out of your face, “we’re here to have fun”

You wondered why he was still willing to come to the party with you as your boyfriend. Maybe he wanted to do you one last favor with Yuta, or maybe he wasn’t done indulging in Naeun’s petty games. You looked at his forearms, noticing a few scratches that weren’t there yesterday.

“I’m guessing you and Naeun didn’t make up last night”

He shook his head, and rubbed his hands on your back, keeping your temper down.

“Did you get in a fight?”

“Something like that”

You didn��t know what came over you. It was anger and protectiveness, possessiveness even. You laced your fingers in his locks, letting his head rest against the wall. If Naeun wanted you to speak in her language, then so be it.

You started kissing his neck, on that part on the side that is tender and sensitive. You heard passerbys whistling at the two of you, seemingly getting it on in public. Your licks and sucks weren’t meant for pleasure though, you had a goal and that was to leave a bruise. A statement for Naeun.

You walked in the building hand in hand and followed Jae to the kitchen, where he poured you a drink out of the bottle he brought along. Looking around, you sensed a couple familiar faces staring back at you from the crowd. Taeyong from class, Mark and Ten, and last but not least, Naeun. You downed the drink in one shot and lead Jaehyun to the dance floor.

He put his hands on your hips, and swayed you at the sound of some club song you weren’t familiar with. You ground your ass against him and he hissed, keeping you close against him. A little voice in your head was screaming how this isn’t real, to him this is all pretend, but you ignored it. You wanted her to think that he was yours, that she couldn’t hurt him anymore.

“Why are you doing this to me y/n? Yuta’s not even around”

Jae turned you around, and you put your hands on his shoulders. He looked absolutely breathtaking tonight. You searched his face for a flaw, yet couldn’t find any. You wouldn’t change a single thing on him.

“She’s here” you said venomously.

He buried his face in your neck, inhaling the smell of your hair and trying to ground himself from his high. “I don’t give a fuck about Naeun”

He kissed your ear and your mind fogged up even more.

“She didn’t ask me to meet up yesterday, I did. I wanted to tell her that she and I were done, for good. I thought she wouldn’t be here tonight, but I guess she changed her mind”

What?

“Then why are you here? And why did you let me give you that big ass hickey?”

He stopped nibbling on your ear, and whispered to it instead.

“I’d never miss up on a chance to feel yours”

The bodies dancing next to you, the liquer you had downed a few minutes ago and Jaehyun’s words were getting too much to handle. You felt suffocated, unable to distinguish where reality ended and pretending began with you two.

“Jae, I need a moment, excuse me”

Releasing yourself from his grasp, you made your way to the kitchen. There wasn’t any fresh air, but there was plenty of booze. You poured yourself a shot and as you downed it, you felt another liquid trickling down your top.

You looked up to find out who managed to make this night even worse for you, only to come across the last person you needed to see tonight. Yuta.

“Shit I’m sorry”, he muttered and you avoided eye contact, thinking you’d manage to get away without him realizing it was you. Luck wasn’t on your side tonight.

“Well well well. Long time no see.”

Confidence was dripping from his smile, to his stance, to the way he looked at you. He had dyed his hair your favorite color, his white locks begging to be tugged and played with. To top it all off, he smelled good, so, so good. He smelled dangerous. Comfortable.

You immediately realized that you didn’t have the self control needed to resist him. Turning on your heel, you started to get the hell out of there when he held your wrist, keeping you in place.

“Wait, I’m sorry, you can’t stay like this, you’ll catch a cold”

“Since when are you worried about me?”

“C’mon y/n, please. Come upstairs, I’ll give you a clean shirt. No funny business, I promise”

You hated yourself for this, but you followed him upstairs to his room, like a pray falling right into the hunter’s trap. He closed the door behind him, muting the loud music and you sat on his bed that you were so familiar with. Looking through his closet, he passed you one of his t-shirts, and turned around to let you change with some privacy. It was comical how chivalrous he was acting, considering the unspeakable things you’ve done in here.

“Not like you’ll see something you haven’t seen already”, you murmured and he chuckled, raising his hands.

“Hey, I’m a gentleman. It’s my fault, after all. I have a habit of getting you wet.”

Blushing at his comment, you quickly changed into the clean shirt and felt the bed dip next to you. You thanked him under your breath and started getting up, when you felt him hold you back once again.

“Stay, just a moment. I’ve missed you”

“What do you want?”

“You, baby”

Yuta was the one who said it, but you swore you felt Jaehyun’s voice reverberating through the nickname. Suddenly, it felt like there was no air for you to breathe.

“That’s not happening, Yuta. I’m with Jaehyun now”

He scoffed, “Jaehyun? Naeun’s puppy? Come on now, we both know you can do better than that”

“Don’t talk about him like that”, you bite back, but he doesn’t budge.

“What kind of boyfriend leaves his girl alone in a party like this?” He grips your chin, making you stare at him face to face, impossibly close. “Look at you. Every single guy in this party wants to fuck you. You expect me to be ok with this?”

Yuta lets his other hand glide on your knee, moving up to your thigh slowly. He smiled at how easy it was to focus on him.

“Do you remember how I made you feel? How I reminded you that you’re mine? You were moaning so loud, Mark thought you’d pass out. You loved it.”

You wanted to scream, tell him that this was the past you, that you couldn’t take going back to him once again and get your heart broken one more time, but you felt helpless around him. The warm feeling was only temporary, it would soon evaporate when you face the fact that to him, you are nothing but a play toy, a possession.

And that’s when Jaehyun barged in through the door. His eyes moved frantically from Yuta’s hands on your thighs, to his band tee you wore, to your discarded top on the floor. He quickly turned red, the color spreading from his neck to his face, then landing on his ears.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing with my girlfriend?”

You instantly got up, following his thought sequence.

“It’s not what it looks like! He spilled his drink on me and gave me a clean shirt and..and..”

“And you decided to sit on his lap to thank him?”, he mocked you and Yuta laughed.

“Calm down, dude. I didn’t make her do anything. Besides, it’s not the first time y/n found her way over here after some disappointing dick”

Jaehyun grabbed him by the collar and pulled him up from the bed, forcing him to stand and face him. You moved between the two, trying to stop the catastrophe that was about to happen. Jae might have more muscle power than Yuta, but if the whole frat ganged up on him he would have to leave this place in a stretcher.

“Jaehyun please, let’s just go. Baby, please”

The nickname was the only thing that brought him out of his rage and made him listen to you. He let go of Yuta and took your hand, dragging you out of the room.

You were two hallways down when you pulled away, forcing him to stop.

“Why did you have to get so mad?”

“Why the fuck did you go back to him?”

“I didn’t! It was just.. so hard for me to tell him no”

You felt your eyes water with how pathetic you sounded. Jaehyun rubbed his hands over his face, groaning in frustration.

“Don’t you understand how much it fucking hurts? To see you with that guy that treats you like shit when I’m right here, willing to give you everything? When I’m in love with you?”

You couldn’t process what he said because in a moment, his mouth was on yours. The kiss was so different than the one you shared at the hallway of your campus. It was passionate, it was rough, and this time, he monopolized your attention. His lips were determined to bruise into yours, leaving you breathless and causing your back to fall against a wall. It was crowded around you, eyes prying into your intimate moment but to you, the only person around was Jaehyun.

“You smell like him”, he growled, sucking on the tender spot under your ear, “makes me wanna fuck his scent off of you”

That was all you needed to hear. You led him to the frat’s guest room, knowing that Taeil always kept a spare key in the lamp next to the door. Unlocking the door seemed like a tour de force with Jaehyun leaving open mouthed kisses on your neck, but you finally managed to stumble inside. You locked the door behind you, continuing your heated kiss, hands roaming around each other’s body.

He was taller than you, so when you felt him grab your ass with such eagerness, you almost lifted off the ground. You palmed him through his jeans, the roughness of his hard on making your panties stick from wetness just a bit more.

“I want to taste you” you managed through kisses, but he just unzipped your skirt as a response, pulling it to the floor in one hasty move. Petting your clit through your underwear, a shiver ran down your spine, spreading goosebumps all over your arms and legs.

“I don’t think I have the patience for that”

He walked you backwards towards the guest bed, taking his pants and shirt off along the way. You sat on the edge of it and admired his godly proportions, when you took notice of the bruises and scratches that led to your fight on Saturday. Suddenly feeling the need to slow down, you started leaving kisses over each and every one of them. You wanted him to trust you, give in to you completely. He had his flaws just like he said, but you wanted all of him. And you wanted him now.

“I need you, now”, you voiced your thoughts and helped him take off his boxers, revealing his hard cock. He was thick and decently long, making your mouth water and your pussy clench.

Towering on top of you, he removed your panties that were embarrassingly damp at this point, and by his smirk, you knew he noticed.

Jaehyun bent your legs next to your torso, making you expose all of you. He licked his lips as he dove into your lower ones, muttering praises about your “pretty pussy”, turning you impossibly wet.

Jung Jaehyun never disappoints, you thought, because the moment you felt the first lap over your sensitive bud, you got a taste of heaven. He alternated between licking and sucking over the spot that turned you into putty against him. You were already unbearably turned on at this point, and the changing pace of his tongue made you lose your mind.

Your pants and moans only seemed to urge him on, and after a few minutes of his careful treatment you felt yourself getting close. He must have sensed it, because when you grabbed the bedpost in an effort to stop shaking, he stood on his knees, and reached for a condom in his wallet.

You didn’t have time to complain about the denial of your orgasm, and started taking Yuta’s shirt off, when he grabbed your hands and placed them back on their previous position on the headboard.

“Don’t”, he said sternly as he lined himself up your entrance, “I want to fuck you in his shirt”

There was no time to think about whether his request was healthy or not, because when you felt him stretch you out, the only thing on your mind was him and his dick.

You let out a deep moan and he took it as a sign to screw himself deeper inside you. Your pussy gushed uncontrollably, filling the room with the lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin. You unlaced your fingers and ran them down his back, ghosting them over the dimples that had affected you so much.

Jaehyun lowered himself, letting his chest touch yours, and you could feel his abs contracting over the fabric of Yuta’s shirt.

“I bet he’s never eaten you out like that, yeah?”

“N-no, never, ahh”

He sat up again, putting your legs over his shoulders and lifted your butt off the mattress, gripping your hips to steady himself before continuing his incredible pace.

“You’re mine, aren’t you baby? Mine to give you everything.”

The position felt divine. He was hitting it incredibly deep, reaching the spot that had you moaning so loud you were thankful for the unbearably loud music of the party. You were sure his fingers would leave a mark over your hipbones but you didn’t care, the pain only accentuating the warm feeling in your belly.

“J-Jae don’t stop - fuck don’t stop I’m gonna cum”

He leaned over, grabbing your face that was contorting in pleasure.

“Look at me when you cum for me”, he demanded, and when you rolled your eyes behind your head, letting go, he let out his first moan for the night.

He kissed your lips sweetly, helping you ride out your high.

“You’re so beautiful, my baby. So, so beautiful”, he praised and you submitted fully to him. He turned your body around, positioning you in all fours, and you wondered where the gentle boy you met at Johnny’s house went. His dick buried in you once again, spreading your juices around and the sensitivity of your previous orgasm made you aware of every single inch.

“So fucking tight”

Jaehyun didn’t go easy on you. He saw how much you liked it, how you were pushing your ass against his cock. He pounded in and out of you with the intention of fucking your thoughts out, and that’s just what he did. When the feeling got too much, and making any sort of noise seemed like a feat, you felt him push your hair back, and start biting on your neck, most definitely leaving a mark.

“I’m gonna cum. Fuck, I’m gonna cum”, he muttered, his voice wavering and you felt him release in the condom inside you.

It took a while for the both of you to regain your breaths. Jaehyun’s chest was heaving up and down as you rest your head on top of it, not brave enough to break the silence.

“I’m sorry”, he finally said and started petting your hair lovingly.

“About what?”

The bed was foreign and small but you both stayed still, wanting to bask a little more in the peacefulness of the moment.

“About getting so possessive, and saying all these things out of jealousy. I acted just like him..”

You kissed his left peck, listening to his heart that was starting to beat in a faster pace.

“Jaehyun, you’re nothing like Yuta. I get how you felt, I feel the same way when I think about you with Naeun”

He took your hand that was resting on his abs and planted a kiss on your palm. Your heart did a flip and you were pressed so close together, he sure must have felt it.

“I should have told you about her sooner. About the fights and how I let her go because of you. I was in denial about my feelings for you because-“

He stopped mid sentence, wary of the way his words would come off to you. Jaehyun was a proud man, but he opened up his heart tonight, admitting he was in love with you. He had already exposed so much of himself that you gave him the time he needed to organize his thoughts.

“Because I was insecure. That you would never like someone like me. That Naeun was right. That you were only interested in playing pretend with me and didn’t mean any of the things you said, and I let myself get carried away in a lie”

You and Jaehyun were two lost souls, trying to break free from the constraints your insecurities built up for you. You didn’t have to succumb to your masochistic tendencies anymore, wasting your time in heartless lovers because now you found him and he found you. Both unable to see any value in themselves, but more that willing to treasure the other. And that was enough for you.

“I’d be honored to be loved by someone like you. Baby.”

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