#i need to listen to singular act 1 and 2

[dearreader]

ur the maisietaybrina mutual for me

why thank you *tips hat*

[gothushi]

pressure

pairing: rob x photographer!reader

warnings: none

note: welcome to my rob mini series!! i’ll update parts as they come

word count: 4.1k

this is part 1! | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5

———————♡

Setting up camp is.. interesting to say the least. Michelle and James are arguing. About what? You’re not sure. Their words are a quiet background noise as you set up your own tent, on the edge of camp, whilst the others do the same. John is getting a table set up, his research items and different notes being scattered around as he begins to document some things.

The distant arguing continues whilst you grab your camera, attaching a different lens and putting your bag into your tent, walking to the outer edge of camp by the treeline. Lifting it to your face, you begin to get a few shots of your acquaintances. Some of John writing in his notebook, of Lisa and Tim setting up the tent they’ll share, Rob getting a small fire started, taking way too many just to get the right shot. It’ll take hours to go through them all once back at the hotel.

Focused on a shot of the treeline, just getting the edge of a few tents in the shot, you pan back around. Your feet stretch with the way you’re crouched, muscles tired after long hours of hiking, when you notice you don’t see Rob by the fire anymore, just John. Camera being pulled from your face, the looming figure beside you makes your heart jolt.

“Christ, make some damn noise next time.” You startle, huffing a breath of air, tilting your head up to look at Rob. A small laugh breaks out of him, sending butterflies fluttering in your gut.

“I thought it would be funny to sneak up on you.” The sound of James and Michelle arguing gets a bit louder, and it seems as though Rob was searching for an escape from their tension. “I couldn’t be over there another minute listening to those two. How’s the photos coming?”

You falter for just a moment, glancing at your camera before craning your neck back up to him, “Oh um- they’re coming good, the company wants me to get plenty of shots of everyone and where we camp.”

“I bet they do,” Rob’s blues take a glance at the argument further away, before back down to you as he fights the grin forming on his face, “how many pictures do you need of them bitching at each other?” The comment pulls another laugh out of you as you lift your camera again, zooming in and focusing on John as he’s jotting down some notes, bent over his table.

“I’d like to keep it at zero. But if they’re like this the entire trip..” Michelle has been on James’ ass since you all met up, nitpicking the way he acts, the questions he asks. Granted, sometimes he isn’t very professional but this is a new experience for him and personally you enjoy his enthusiasm compared to Michelle’s bluntness. Rob gives a rare chuckle, arms crossed over his chest as he watches you.

“I’m sure James will forget about this in like.. ten minutes.” He observes you for a moment before talking again, “You’re always taking so many pictures. Why so many? Why not just get a few of the entire group?”

“Why so- well, I have to be picky. I snap like ten photos of a singular moment but they’re still all- different.” You look up at him, neck craning at you explain, “Nothing can be captured twice, whether it’s a specific position, feeling, the lighting, so I take a lot when I do capture stuff and once I go through them all I can hand pick the ones that-..” You pause, face beginning to flush when you realize you started to word vomit, “Sorry. Basically, I’m picky.”

“No it’s okay.” Rob assures, the smile on his face still there, those butterflies in your belly still there. “It’s just-.. Interesting you find the value in capturing those individual moments- capturing time.” He shifts his weight on his feet, hip cocked out to one side, arms crossed but he seems.. relaxed.

Standing to your full height, staring down at you camera, you continue, “You like experiencing the moments. I like experiencing them as well, don’t get me wrong, but I like capturing them too. Having physical proof of that moment or time.. is nice.”

“You like documenting things.” Rob muses aloud. He’s still a bit withdrawn, but this is the most he’s engaged with any of the group when it wasn’t necessary besides John. He seems to be thinking about your words, “You like having physical proof of things that are gone otherwise?”

A huff of a laugh escapes your lips, “If you’re making fun of me now, then you’d faint if you seen the bookshelf in my living room. Half of it is photo albums.” You play on the screen of your camera, adjusting some lighting settings.

“Why so attached to the past?” He asks. His attention wanes to the other two still being snappy with each other, struggling to put up their tent as John steps in to help. “I get having momentos sure, but why the obsession with documenting everything?” His words aren’t harsh, just merely curious. It’s obvious to him that this job, the act of photography itself, means a lot to you.

“Not really obsessed but-..” You think for a moment, eyes squinting in the sunlight as you lift your camera up again, “more like.. I want the physical memories. Everything’s become so digital that… I mean if I have kids in the future and then they have kids, I want to have things to pass down to them, and when I’m older I’ll want this proof of everything I’ve experienced.” Rob turns toward you, his eyes squinting from the same ray of setting sunlight, seeming genuinely intrigued.

“So you’re a romantic?” The words leave him with a little smile over his pretty lips. “You know, I can’t say I’ve ever thought about how I’d like to prove my time in this world. I’ve always tried to live more in the present.”

Color blooms on your cheeks as he hits the nail on the head, you are very much a romantic. “Sometimes what I do is just capturing the moment, taking a simple photo to be used for stock or something.” Your shoulders shrug, eyes narrowing overtop your camera as Michelle seems to still be arguing with James whilst John sets their tent up.

A few paces away, their little argument is continuing on, but Rob seems eager to just not pay much attention to it. “I guess I can see the appeal.” He muses, eyes trained on you, “So you keep albums with these photos? Do you frame them?”

You nod, pulling the camera away from your face. No use taking photos of them fighting. “I frame some. Only really special ones. But I have albums for different jobs or trips, family stuff.”

The sun is setting, just barely peeking through the trees and lighting up the clearing the group settled to camp in. “Makes sense, how many albums do you have?”

Letting out a heavy breath, a hint of a laugh on it, you shrug, “God I dunno, I don’t think I’ve ever counted.”

“Over ten?��

“Definitely.” Another nod and laugh from you, turning to look up at him. He stands at least a foot taller.

“You realized that’s abnormal, right? Most people don’t even think about keeping one physical album.”

“That’s the point!” You defend, “No one really keeps physical photos anymore! It’s all digital. And, while digital is great and all, it takes one mistake for it all to be gone in an instant.”

His eyebrows raise, really listening, actually interested, “So you’re stockpiling photos because you’re.. afraid of breaking your laptop?”

A deadpan look crosses your face, staring up at him, “Yes, that’s the entire reason I went to college and studied for this to be my job for the rest of my life.” The words leave you sarcastically as you power off your camera.

“That’s one way to look at it.” A chuckle leaves Rob, arms still crossed over his broad chest. His eyes glance back to the others to find all tents up, everyone beginning to gather around the fire he started before, “Ready to join the others?”

With a glance up at him, he gestures for you to go first, and follows behind as you go to join the rest of the group. It’s been a long day, between finding out the area you were meant to camp and survey had been totally deforested, finding one of the men from the logging company, to getting ditched by one of the guides, Carlos, you’re all definitely tired. James films some more whilst you all sit around the fire and have something to eat, making low conversation between mainly James and whoever he asks a question to. Bidding everyone goodnight as they scatter to their tents, fire dulled down to just hot embers, you go to sleep.

—

A low growling wakes you, your watch says 3:27AM, and the nightlife of the jungle is just as loud as it is in the daytime. Shuffling around in your sleeping bag, groggy, your ears strain to listen. Something’s stomping around the camp, sniffing, huffing, growling even, and it doesn’t sound familiar to any larger predators you’ve heard before. It sets your nerves alight, some instinctive feeling of fear building in your gut. But thankfully, it goes away quickly. The footsteps and clattering of it knocking some of the metal camping items fades away to the usual jungle life noises, animals chattering or sounding out different calls. The day was tiring enough that it lulls you back to sleep quite quickly.

—

Morning comes soon enough, the sun rising and everyone waking naturally to the sound of different animal calls and the noise of John and Rob rousing first. It’s an uneventful morning, someone brewing a little pot of coffee over the fire which you are so thankful for when Rob fills your thermos. A quiet thanks is said before you just observe the others, watching John pick up the small table that was knocked over last night. You want to ask about the animal, ask if either John or Rob know what it was exactly, but it doesn’t seem like the right moment. Everyone’s groggy, quiet, getting coffee in their thermos’, short words exchanged as they all wake up. John wastes no time in gathering everyone up though, ready for a few hours of hiking and exploring.

—

A couple of hours of hiking warrants a break, stopping by the river crowded by rocks and a waterfall no taller than you. Everyone scatters around, Maria by herself, John and Rob sat together exchanging some words and getting some water, Lisa collecting some more moss in her little tubes. This is the perfect opportunity to get some landscape shots, collecting your camera and sitting down at the edge of the water.

Eyes are on you though, Rob’s deep blues unable to stop from wandering to you as you just.. simply do your job. His thoughts are interrupted when John speaks, “Enjoying the view?”

“Shut up.” The quip leaves Rob’s lips as he averts his eyes away, making John laugh.

“Okay.” He sees how his best friend acts around you, understands that there’s something more there than just friendly, “Why haven’t you asked her out yet?”

Rob gawks for a moment before schooling his expression and clearing his throat, “We’re- colleagues John, it’s-”

“Not technically. She’s just contracted on this job. Not like she works with us all the time.”

“It’s still different.” Rob argues back softly. He’s avoiding the point, because he knows deep down he just doesn’t have the courage to ask you out yet. It’s just not a risk he’s willing to take.

“Coward.” John mutters, fishing his water bottle from his pack and taking a sip. Rob ignores him, watches as you step from the edge of the small hill to look down at your camera. Something spurs him to his feet, moving towards you. “Go get ‘em tiger.” A smack lands on the back of Rob’s leg from John, making him scowl as the other laughs at him, loving that he’s aggravating him.

A flash of a middle finger makes John crack up again, before Rob appears by your side, “Hey,”

Flicking your gaze up to him, you greet back with a smile, “Hi.”

Just that single word makes his heart pound a bit, lifts his mood just a little, “Getting some good photos?”

A nod, “Yeah, they wanted me to get a lot of landscape photos but.. probably won’t even use half of what I submit. They always do that..” Your attention is focused on the screen of your camera, flicking through the various snapshots you just got of the river and small waterfall.

“Do you mind if I take a look?” Rob leans in just a hair more, smelling your natural scent and something faint like a sweet shampoo. It sends his nerves alight, making him swallow. Despite that dull feeling that swirls in his gut, he really is curious about your pictures. Never having a reason to deny him, you shake your head and step closer to him, tilting the camera screen towards him so he can hopefully see well despite the rays of sun peeking through the treetops. He really can’t tell the difference between them… maybe the rushing water or the physical angle you used.. but his inexperienced eye can’t tell much other than they’re pretty photos.

His hand moves, some instinctive action to rest on the small of your back, since you’re both stood by the edge of the hill. He’s so hyper aware of how close you are, how good you smell, it’s clouding his brain in the worst way possible. How much larger he is than you, his hand splays over your back nearly covering the width of it.. God.

“I probably got my feet wet for nothing, I bet they won’t even use the ones from in the water.” Your voice snaps him out of it, eyes focusing back on the camera. Then he notices your shoes and bottom of your cargos are wet, you must’ve stepped into the river when he wasn’t looking, too occupied being teased by John. He swallows again, staring as you flick through a few more before his eyes flit to your face.

“Even if that’s the case- I mean- they’re still really good.” He’s struggling to find the right words, actually stumbling over his sentence and that makes some embarrassed heat rise to his face. It’s easy to excuse it on the humidity though.

Your shoulder brushes against his chest when you glance up at him, sending a ripple of electricity up his spine, flashing your cute smile up at him, “Thanks, if anything I’ll pick out a few and they’ll go into the album for this trip.”

“Maybe you could send them to me sometime.” He offers, the words leaving his mouth before his brain even comprehends them. It causes you to falter, not expecting him to suggest that, before your smile grows and so does the size of his heart.

“Yeah? I mean- yeah I can, if you’d like. Just remind me when we get back.”

The butterflies in his gut are going insane, normally he can control himself but.. maybe it’s the closer proximity, your scent, maybe it’s even just the moment itself. His eyes dart from your own to your lips, back and forth, doing a shitty job at hiding it. Fortunately for him, and unfortunately for you, or maybe the other way around, you’re a terrible flirt, so you don’t really notice.

The distant raising of Maria’s voice pulls you both from the moment, looking over towards the edge of the trail where both Maria and Michelle, with James filming per usual, are stood, “No you don’t get it! You don’t want to know what it was!” The raised tone of her thick accent catches everyone else's attention as you both move over, and John is also joining in to try and separate them, but Maria keeps going, “There are thing’s here you couldn’t even begin to comprehend! You treat this jungle with no respect.” She sidesteps John and he goes between the two women, trying to calm them down.

John tries to de-escalate, speaking to Maria whilst glancing between her and James who’s still filming, “I can promise you that we are treating this area with the utmost respect, okay? Okay?” Maria ignores him and moves towards the trail, clearly ready to move on as John turns to James and Michelle to scold them both.

“We just wanna know what was in camp last night!” James defends, but it only aggravates John further.

“Listen- I will look at the tracks when we get back, okay? I’m sure I can figure out what they are. But for now, stop. You're making this harder than it needs to be.” He turns towards the group as they’re gathered on the trail, eager to move on from this moment.

“Well..” You start, muttering quietly mainly to Rob beside you. He was waiting to see if he needed to step in, now watching as James and Michelle grab their bags. “I was curious about whatever animal it was too but.. guess I’m glad I wasn’t the first to ask.” There’s a dry amusement to your tone that makes Rob give a small chuckle.

Your group carries on, a tense quiet besides some muttering between the pairs, and eventually Rob catches up to John with the intent on asking him a question, but the latter speaks first, “That was painful to watch.”

A hum of agreement escapes the taller one accompanied by a nod, “Mm.. things are tense enough since Carlos left us.”

“I’m talking about your shit attempt at flirting.”

That same aggravation rises in Rob again, “Shut it.”

John snorts a laugh, giving him a nudge on the arm, “I just like pushing your buttons mate, I’ve never seen you like this before.”

“And you never will again.” He retorts back. John knows Rob, and his teasing is making him suddenly feel self conscious over this entire thing. “Just shut up before I shove you off this trail.”

There’s the Rob he knows, making John laugh and raise his hands in defense, falling into conversation about the trail up ahead.

—

A couple of tense hours pass before the group decides to rest again to eat some lunch, whatever dried foods and non perishable items that have been packed, most of the food was in the car Carlos left in..

Everyone scatters into their usual pairs, sat eating jerky or other items and having some water. You’re munching on some trail mix, picking out the good bits, wired earbuds in your ears connected to your iPod. Rob sees you alone, feels this.. odd sense of protection, wanting to be close, so he goes with it, walking over with his water, “Mind if I join you?”

Grinning up as he approached, you muse softly as you pat the ground beside you, “Awfully chatty today, am I your favorite?” As he grins down at you, you hold your trail mix bag out as an offering.

He smirks a bit, watching as you pull an earbud from your right ear as he sits next to you, long legs stretching out alongside yours, scooping out a small handful of trail mix, “Oh absolutely, you’re the highlight of my life.” His tone is laced with amusement and a hint of sarcasm. His tone makes you snort a laugh, taking a sip of water whilst your other hand lifts your camera up, as you were in the middle of looking through some things, lifting it to take some photos of everyone resting. “Do you actually keep most of these photos, or do you just take them so you have an excuse to not socialize with everyone else?”

“You caught me,” the amusing accusation pulls a small laugh from you, giving him a glance before looking back through your camera, “I don’t keep every photo, but I’ll keep one or two from each group. So, a couple of the water from earlier, one of these now.”

“I figured as much,” He hums, fishing out a little bag of jerky from his pack, “How much are they willing to pay for those anyway?”

“You’d probably faint if I told you.” Pulling your camera down, you look at the few you just snapped, “Is Michelle still scowling?”

That question turns Rob’s attention to said woman, seeing her with.. indeed quite a sour look on her face. “Like she’s trying to shoot daggers with her eyes.” He confirms.

“She’s ruining the damn pictures,” You complain softly, glancing at Rob as he chews. Scooting a few inches away to twist towards him, you lift your camera again and snap some photos. It catches him off guard when he glances at you, a slight heat forming on his face.

“Hey, what’re you-”

“Shh shh, just look the other direction.” Your hand waves a little, wanting him to turn his head towards the group rather than look directly at you. He gets a slightly indifferent look on his face, almost like he doesn’t wanna listen, but he has no reason not to, so he turns the way he was again. Grinning behind your camera, you snap a few and then lower it to look at them. One of them caught that look on his face, like he wanted to frown or pout, and it’s so cute you feel your heart do a little flip. Scooting back next to him, you speak again, “Much better.”

He laughs along with your little chuckle, finishing chewing his bite of jerky, “So, how do I fare in your professional opinion?”

“Quite nice,” You muse, smiling as you tilt the camera so he can see, “much better than Michelle’s scowl.” The photos are simple, they’re.. him. He doesn’t see the appeal really but they are a nice quality. He thinks they’re okay, he just isn’t used to his photo being taken. Still, there’s a small smile on his lips that prompts you to speak again, “I can send these to you too, if you’d like.”

His smile widens even by just a bit, nodding, “Mm, yeah.”

“Is she still scowling?”

Another soft huff of laughter, “Yeah, guess she didn’t like being told off.”

You groan a little, lifting your camera to get some photos of Lisa scraping up some moss at the base of a tree, “Would it be mean to go tell her to fix her face so I can do my job?”

That pulls an unexpected laugh from Rob, louder than the other softer huffs before, and it makes something flip-flop in your stomach. You have to look over at him, because that might be the loudest thing you’ve heard from him when he isn’t yelling at someone. “Shut up, I’m serious!”

He laughs a little more, nodding like he believes you, “I think she’d eat you alive before that happens.” Looking through your camera again, you see her sour expression as she’s even glancing over at the two of you, curious as to what’s so funny.

It pulls a giggle out of you as you nod to him, “Yeah, she might kill me.”

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll protect you.”

“Yeah, okay, you’d grab some popcorn and sit back.”

He laughs again, watching as you start to put your camera back into its little bag, “Mm, I could do that. Who needs entertainment when you’re on the trail with a couple of ladies getting into a cat fight?”

“Give me that, I’m done sharing with you.” You playfully grab your trail mix back, the bag having been in between the two of you. He plays along and huffs like he’s annoyed.

“Oh c’mon, y’want me to starve?”

“I think you’ll live.” You start to fish out some of the m&m’s from the mix, the half melted candy smearing colors onto your fingertips.

“Those are my favorite y’know.” He hums, trying to push your buttons on purpose. He likes playing around with you, he doesn’t do this with anyone else.

You give him a look, like are you serious? before looking back down at the bag of assorted nuts and dried fruits, picking out some more of the candy. You know he’s just playing, but you speak anyway, “Hold out your hand.”

Rob stares for a second, almost not listening but something in him is compelled to, so he does. His hand flattens out, palm up, watching as you drop the candies into his hand. His heart does a little flip, grinning before popping the m&m’s into his mouth in one go, the half melted chocolate almost as sweet as you. “I knew you really liked me.” He murmurs, voice laced with a teasing tone.

“Oh shut up.” You laugh it off, but the moment between you two has your heart pounding a bit harder, skin tingling where it had met his larger hand when you gave him the candy.

———————♡

[subzeroparade]

*chant* New fic! New fic! New fic!

So excited you’ve posted a new ER fic, and with a teaser for more to come! 🎉🎉🎉

Since it’s been awhile, maybe I poke your brain on what your thoughts on the DLC are (game play, lord, sceneries, anything you’d like to share with us really)? Has it changed your headcanon on any of the characters, or did you find ways to incorporate the new lores into your interpretations? Most importantly, did you have fun?

*tagged for spoilers but just in case - spoilers •‿•*

Did I enjoy it? YES. Did I have qualms with some gameplay bits? YES but I’m a filthy casual on NG+2 or something and generally Not Good at Game. But I beat it. 

As for lore, it’s really a mixed bag. There’s a ton of stuff I’m delighted to have new or expanded lore for - Marika’s origins, Belurat and the entirety of Hornsent culture, Godwyn’s Death Knights, BAYLE???? VILE BAYLE!!!! etc etc (sometimes I listen to Igon’s voice lines just to psych myself up for real life). There are things I need to adjust my headcanon for a little, as well - St Trina, for example, has always been a facet of Miquella himself to me, a sort of alter ego he willingly takes on, which is how I enjoyed writing her in fic. To have her elaborated here as a separate person means taking that a little further if I write him/her/them again, but I think the parallel it draws between Marika/Radagon is hugely interesting as well.  

iirc there are a couple of instances in the base game where lore almost contradicts itself, but I think in some cases the DLC got a little sloppy. The timeline is also way foggier to me now than it was previously. I was a big fan of the idea that Messmer was entirely unknown to his siblings, written out of history after the Crusade (predating Marika ushering in the Golden Age of the Erdtree), but that contradicts the lore we get on Gaius and Radahn as they’re both personally acquainted with Messmer, and makes me wonder which of the other demigods might’ve been aware of him, and under what pretences might they have met. It makes for a lot of fic ideation, but I’m of the opinion that if you’re writing fic, sticking too closely to (the sometimes unhelpful) lore will stultify the work; so I’m trying to pluck little instances of new lore that interest me to bolster the story I want to tell.  

Like most of the fandom I have a huge beef with Promised Consort Radahn, and I’m still struggling with how to work that into my headcanon. To me, there is simply no reason for it. There are no indications of it in the base game, and you have to tie yourself into continuity knots for it to make any sense - and that’s just bad writing. I’m not against retconning things if they serve a purpose, but this was neither useful nor necessary (nor well done), and that’s fundamentally disappointing for a Fromsoft game. The more people aggressively try and justify it, the more I feel like the potential explanations unravel. If we’re going along with the assumption that Miquella *needs* a lord to ascend, we’ve had Candidate #1 since the base game: Godwyn. Half of what we know about base-game Miquella is that he spent time and resources trying to grant Godwyn some form of peace, while his hideous fate hangs over the narrative in perpetuity. And we give Radahn closure literally in the first act of the game. I’m a firm believer in Miquella knowing 100% what he’s about, but in this singular instance blinded by love for Godwyn and an all-consuming desire to *fix this* by resurrecting some nightmarish, malformed version of him. There’s so much juicy story to be told in Miquella refusing to acknowledge the thing he brought back is not his brother, and for all that godhood and remaking the world into utter passivity can do, it can’t retrieve Godwyn’s irretrievable soul. All that to say, I’d even take Malenia as his promised consort - it would made more sense than Radahn, too.

Anyway tldr I don’t have to think about how disappointing that is now, because the fic I’m working on is around Marika’s ascension, and more specifically Messmer and Melina’s upbringing. There’s another on the backburner but I’m on the fence about it since it hasn’t reached an outline stage yet, and I don’t start anything unless I am 100% sure I know how to finish it, and finish it well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Ty for the ask! As is the case with me, the rest of my musings on the lore come through in fic writing, because those are the texts dumps I’m good at. Here’s a little (young) Melina and Messmer wip as thanks. 

[dreamsy990]

ur into epic the musical right . should i like. listen to/watch(???) that..........

i know like one singular song bc someone used it for a corrupt purevani animatic and im lowkey insane abt it so like....... Are There More Banger Songs

YES YES OH MY GOD YES I AM SO SERIOUS YES. BECOME BRAINROTTED WITH ME. THERE IS NOT A SINGLE SONG IN EPIC I WOULD EVEN CONSIDER BELOW AVERAGE IT ALL GOES INSANELY HARD YOULL LOVE IT HERE

giving you a ✨beginners guide to epic✨ for your initiation! assuming you know absolutely nothing for this bgfrbgf

so epic is a concept album for a musical adaptation of the odyssey. the only "official" material is the music itself, some stage directions from the livestreams, and official animatics (which i dont reccomend for your first experience with epic). its also fully sung through (think hamilton), so theres no dialogue between scenes. so dont worry about missing anything! the whole thing is broken into 9 albums called sagas. in order, these are called troy, cyclops, ocean, circe, underworld, thunder, wisdom, vengeance, and ithaca. dont worry about them really, since theyre all released at this point its only relevant for discussion, and youll pick it up pretty quickly if you go insane about them <3

as for a first experience of epic, id suggest watching animatics, because sometimes it can be very hard to follow the story without visuals. i have a personal playlist i reccomend to people of my favorite animatics, which you can find here. its like 2 hours long, but if you want to break it up, act 1 ends at the song monster and has a nebulous time skip afterwards, so thats a pretty nice point to take a break. or you can listen to one saga at a time if youre a freak like that, theyre all about 15 minutes long id say

after you do that, if youre a fan and wanna get involved, id personally reccomend skimming through some of jorge's tiktoks/shorts going over details about epic first. theres a lot of fun trivia there and a lot of the popular jokes in the fandom come straight from him.

if you need any elaboration on anything lmk! i will explain basically anything :>

[autisticvelo]

🧡 VELO

• 25 years old.

• it / its pronouns.

• white swede.

• professionally diagnosed level 2 autism.

• moderate support needs.

• no / low masking.

• visibly autistic + visibly disabled.

• demi-verbal plus regularly complete verbal shutdown, part time AAC user.

• trans & queer.

• physically disabled.

• rollator & wheelchair user.

• DID system.

• i also have ADHD combined type and dyscalculia.

🧡 SPECIAL INTERESTS

> current ;

• supernatural (the tv show) 🪽

• medicine & healthcare 🏥🩺

• plushies 🧸

> inactive ;

• bones (the tv show) 🦴

• commercial aviation ✈️

🧡 BYF

• i support autism levels and support needs labels.

• non verbal, semi verbal and nonspeaking are long lasting / permanent things, not episodic; use verbal shutdown or other more appropriate labels if you have episodes of not being able to speak.

• uplifting level 2 and level 3 + msn & hsn autistics is important and doing so does not invalidate level 1 + lsn autistics. this also goes for uplifting people with intellectual disability too.

• i support educated self diagnosis.

• people with intellectual disability have repeatedly stated that the r-slur is not reclaimable, and that they do not want to see it used, “reclaimed” or not. listen to them.

• i will absolutely try to put IDs on any images i post or reblog, my memory is really bad so i might forget sometimes (im happy to be reminded).

• being a system affects how i talk / type / act, so you might see different parts having different opinions or writing patterns etc. i also go between using i / me & we / us randomly, it depends on which part is fronting & what they prefer. we also have different opinions on non traumagenic systems but have decided any system can interact with this blog as its focus is on autism, not systems. it is also always safe to refer to us by singular it / its or plural they / them pronouns, as those are our collective pronouns.

• i have a hard time understanding a lot of things and might not understand politics as an example, but i am always happy to at least try to learn, i just need more explanations.

• i have autism (duh. autism blog) and two personality disorders that all make me struggle with understanding empathy and showing sympathy. i am not ‘un-caring’ on purpose, i can’t control it. i always try to be mindful though, so if i come off as mean or rude, please let me know because it’s not guaranteed i noticed or understood i was mean or rude. please assume i am acting in good faith, but i am always open to being told that i have done something wrong.

• if i’ve said something wrong or offensive, please let me know so i can learn to do better & get better understanding because not always guaranteed i understand issue, others experience or what was upsetting.

🧡 PSA

• link to the picrew in my profile picture

• if you need anything i’ve written simplified, please let me know & i will do my best to reformulate myself.

• sometimes i write “properly” but it takes a long time and a lot of energy, so you will often see me writing shorter sentences with “bad” grammar, please don’t comment on how i type, i am aware of it and i am already frustrated about not being able to communicate properly all the time so i don’t need people pointing it out.

• likes & follows comes from @strange-autism , that is my main blog.

[starsinthesky5]

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTFhvrqsq/

someone needs to throw ticketmaster in jail. the entire company. BECAUSE IT IS A FUCKING CRIME THAT I WONT GET TO EXPIERENCE THIS.

me and my bsfs cried over this in the car this morning. WE ARE SO UPSET

and what’s even worse is that our sorta ex friend or at least her ex friend and my kind-of (like we still talk just not as close) friend got tickets for sabrina and she doesn’t even fucking listen to sabrina like that and that’s what pisses me off the most. NAME ONE SONG FROM EICS GIRL. ONE SONG FROM SINGULAR ACTS 1 AND 2. ONE SONG FROM EVOlution.

(context we were a group of four and are now a trio bc she wanted to go ahead and be a little (little? who am i kidding) B to our friend 😃

[sbbreflections]

EXODUS

2. Exodus.

Whew! This one is long. It was packed.

The Lord displays unparalleled power against His enemy, and mercy for his people, using Moses as messenger. God reveals that He is all knowing and even shines His direct light on Moses, because Moses was righteous and obedient. The Ten Commandments are written (Exodus 20) and altars/tabernacles and proper ways are defined.

Moses did not think he was worthy or prepared for what God set on his path. And what *did* Moses know?

Moses knew that he knew nothing. But he was blessed, and having been granted:

1. the only opportunity to lead his people (whom he’d once oppressed) out of slavery;

2. eye-witness to God’s majesty through his very own body (as God spoke and Moses acted or repeated His words - prophesying God’s will); AND

3. singular, direct access to the glory of God (on numerous occasions!);

he quickly came to understand that all he needed to know was God. Moses was granted these things because God trusted him. God knew Moses’s heart.

He had been blessed and protected from birth, shielded from imminent death (in his infancy!) and given the treasure of a royal upbringing. A Hebrew baby boy, literally sentenced to death by the very people who would raise him in their home.

When he grew up, Moses committed a crime, and God vindicated him. Moses told God that he was not capable to do what He asked of him, and God told him that he had everything he would need. A stick by which some of his miracles would be performed, and his brother, Aaron*…

God knew that His people would move at the sounds of Moses’ and Aaron’s voices. However, Pharaoh was a stubborn man, and God knew that too (of course, right). He knew that it would take many disastrous trials - up to and including the overnight massacre of the first born sons of all the land! - before Pharaoh would allow Israel’s people to depart from Egypt. And he also knew that once the exodus began, given the right moment, an army would pursue Israel in an effort to destroy them. The Lord told Moses, upfront, {Exodus4:21-23} “when you arrive, you will show Pharaoh my power through the miracles I have empowered you with, and I will make it so that he rebukes Me** and refuses to let My firstborn child (Israel) go. And you will tell him, since he has refused, I will now k!ll your first born son.” And that is what He did.

Moses was not shy with God. He asked questions from “Why me?” when presented with his big assignment, to “Can’t you forgive and spare the lives of those same people you have just saved from Egypt - YOUR people?” when Israel’s people became restless and decided to participate in idolatry - which apparently The Lord detests! AND had told them NOT to do***. How could they?! He was ready to wipe them OUT.

Moses had gone to meet with The Lord (for 40 days and nights) so that the law and the covenant could be written, and in his absence, the fools turned up! Listen, even Moses was pissed. So much so that he scolded them and destroyed the mess they made. And BECAUSE MOSES ASKED God to consider the weight of his anger (and reminded Him of his promise to His servants Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob {Exodus32:11-13}) - God punished them but He did spare their lives. And only those who came to Him.

*Moses had an older brother who would speak for him (be his mouthpiece), as Moses spoke God’s words - because his older brother was *of* the people (born and raised Hebrew) and could influence and lead them in a way, as well… meaning the people would listen. As such, Aaron the Levite (Moses brother) would eventually become the first High Priest who would consult with The Most High regarding Israel’s (the peoples) most pressing concerns.

**The Pharoah of Egypt, who sees himself and the ancient gods as “God” with pride and dignity, would surely deny the works of The Most High, so long as they could be disproved with magic… The Lord knew that this embedded system would lead to the Exodus (as well as the destruction) he had planned. He also knew it was a sure way to display His own true majesty for the sake of the Israelites.

***The people feared the presence of The Lord who appeared before them just once (on Mt Sinai), and they understood very well who brought them out of Egypt. God demanded that they remember “to not make idols of silver or gold to rival me.” {Exodus20:22-23}.

****Exodus 18:13-26 Moses’ stepfather advised him to assign helpers so Moses would not bear the burden of ALL of Israel's people on his own shoulders. Moses would then only receive the most pressing issues which might need to be taken to The Lord.

Next is Leviticus.

Original Post Dated February 17, 2024

Written x SP

[patches-of-cards-and-stars]

How I understand the cusps between Zodiac Signs/Houses

12 -> 1: The differentiation of self from the whole of all things, the collective becoming the individual, the grandeur of the world is distilled down, infinite possibility becoming a singular reality... self-actualization.

1 -> 2: Anchoring activity into routine, settling in for the long haul, the consequences of deciding who you are, the consequences for both success and failure, the need to refuel, to catch your breath and keep going... the acceptance of desire.

2 -> 3: Learning what it is to have control over your identity, learning to adapt to situations, a steady platform to jump from, starting to piece things together, the decision of who you want to be, the discovery of more ways to be... a certainty of self.

3 -> 4: Embracing joy, work less and be more, the front porch of the house, the backyard, the painted picture completes itself, an empty house before you move in... a sense of belonging.

4 -> 5: The bravery of crossing the boundaries of what is known and comfortable, switching tactics in the mission for self-validation, becoming alert to your impact on others... seeking out affection.

5 -> 6: Unsettling the ego by allowing it to become more than itself, starting to abide by rules, stopping to listen, the pause between the give and take ... the presence of self in the world.

6 -> 7: Prioritizing the gift of other's contributions, the decision to give up distinction for dignity, the act of sending something to someone, of letting it leave your hands ... the act of social connection.

7 -> 8: Starting to ask for more, going deeper, justice beginning to turn emotional, developing greater connections from relationships, losing self by gaining aspects of non-self, the slow process of letting go... negotiating with one's desires.

8 -> 9: Settling into the unknown after taking the leap into the dark, regaining attachments to what is observable, spiritual becomes philosophical, the sun is rising, the light falls over the valley... a diminished sense of self in a massive world.

9 -> 10: Building off of experience, building from what is collected, settling down, using your talents in new ways, knowledge turns into plans, sharing visions and ideas ... accepting responsibility for power.

10 -> 11: Diversifying means of improvement, starting to value accomplishments in new ways, sharing responsibility, acknowledging the role of individuality, duties turn more personal... trying to change the world.

11 -> 12: Going beyond the group, going beyond duty, learning to value emotion, innovation merges with creativity, appreciation for others turning into empathy... reconciling individuality with the collective.

12-> 1 (reprise): The beginning is the end, the end is the beginning, between power and strength, between thought and action, what is there?

[english-proficiency-learning]

Duolingo English Test: Interactive Practice Quiz with Answers

Introduction

Are you preparing for the Duolingo English Test and looking for an effective way to practice? Look no further! This interactive practice quiz is designed to help you get familiar with the test format, improve your skills, and boost your confidence. With instant feedback and detailed answers, you’ll be well on your way to acing the Duolingo English Test.

Why Take the Duolingo English Test?

The Duolingo English Test is a popular choice for students and professionals worldwide due to its convenience and affordability. It's accepted by numerous universities and institutions, offering a flexible alternative to traditional English proficiency exams like IELTS and TOEFL. The test assesses your abilities in reading, writing, listening, and speaking, providing a comprehensive evaluation of your English skills.

Benefits of Interactive Practice Quizzes

Realistic Test Experience: Interactive quizzes simulate the actual test environment, helping you get comfortable with the format and timing.

Immediate Feedback: Instant answers and explanations help you understand your mistakes and learn from them.

Targeted Practice: Focus on specific areas where you need improvement, ensuring efficient and effective preparation.

Engaging Learning: Interactive elements make studying more enjoyable and motivating.

Duolingo English Test: Interactive Practice Quiz

Ready to test your skills? Try the practice quiz below! Each question is designed to reflect the types of tasks you'll encounter on the Duolingo English Test.

Question 1: Vocabulary

Choose the word that best completes the sentence: "The scientist was awarded a prize for her _____ discovery."

A) Innovation

B) Misunderstanding

C) Criticism

D) Confusion

Answer: A) Innovation

Explanation: "Innovation" fits the context of a positive discovery deserving of a prize.

Question 2: Grammar

Identify the incorrect part of the sentence: "She enjoy to read books, especially during the weekends."

A) enjoy

B) to read

C) especially

D) during the weekends

Answer: A) enjoy

Explanation: The correct form is "enjoys" to match the third-person singular subject "She."

Question 3: Reading Comprehension

Read the passage and answer the question: "Jane Austen’s novels often explore the themes of love and social class. Her characters frequently face challenges related to societal expectations."

What themes are commonly found in Jane Austen’s novels?

A) Adventure and mystery

B) Love and social class

C) Science and technology

D) War and peace

Answer: B) Love and social class

Explanation: The passage states that Jane Austen’s novels explore the themes of love and social class.

Question 4: Listening

[Insert audio clip here]

What is the main idea of the audio clip?

A) The benefits of exercise

B) How to cook pasta

C) The history of computers

D) Traveling tips

Answer: A) The benefits of exercise

Explanation: The audio clip discusses various benefits associated with regular exercise.

Question 5: Writing

Write a short paragraph (50-100 words) on the following topic: "Describe your favorite hobby and why you enjoy it."

Sample Answer: My favorite hobby is painting. I enjoy it because it allows me to express my creativity and relax after a long day. The vibrant colors and the act of creating something beautiful bring me immense joy and satisfaction.

How to Use the Practice Quiz Effectively

Set Aside Time: Dedicate specific time slots for practicing with the quiz to ensure consistent progress.

Review Answers: Carefully review the explanations for each question to understand your mistakes.

Focus on Weak Areas: Identify the sections where you struggle the most and spend extra time practicing those skills.

Repeat Regularly: Regular practice will help reinforce your learning and improve your test performance.

Conclusion

Preparing for the Duolingo English Test can be a rewarding experience with the right tools and strategies. This interactive practice quiz offers a fun and effective way to enhance your skills and build confidence. Remember, consistent practice and reviewing your mistakes are key to success. Good luck with your test preparation!

[marvelandponder]

Commentary on the commentary continues!

"The start and end of this chapter is mirrored. It’s right there in the title card. The big twist, I just didn’t see it." "her body is rebelling against her, it didn’t listen." Heavy foreshadowing that we don't know is foreshadowing is my jam

Flash confirmed for goodest of boys. But he has some stiff competition who may also be the goodest

"They stumped me on the word castling" - Look up what castling is. I haven't seen anybody catch this so I'm giving it away as a freebie: Castling, in chess, refers to the move where your King and the rook (royal castle) switch places

TACTICAL BREATHING!! ::pumps fist victoriously:: It helps!!

"[Flash and Sunset] both sorta understand each other in this way." Yeah, they do that. Fun fact: Flash has known Sunset the longest aside from Princess Celestia so, make of that what you will!

Vermin could kick the Bone Hydra's many asses. Or singular ass

G: “Would you jump into the mouth of a basilisk if all your friends did?” T: “Well, if they got out and the basilisk spit did wonders for their general complexion and confidence, then yeah I guess I would.” An exchange between Gloriosa and Timber, I presume

That horse statue could be the real cause of everyone's problems all along

Amusing somebody who actually knows what they're talking about is the highest honour. That's also fabulously interesting, to think about what makes a place significant - in magical terms or otherwise!

"Well she didn’t really mention much of the shakes since around the time Twilight came out, save for when Timber went in." You're right! Sunset did stop shaking as much after she did some breathing and held her girlfriend's hand. Don't let her try to convince you she ain't soft

Nothing concerning here, nope!

And yes, can confirm, her body language was absolutely because she subconsciously missed having a hand to hold. I feel like we may have chatted about this once but Sunset's love language might be touch - which only makes the fact that her powers are dependent on touch that much more significant

Rarity would absolutely make her something warm and fabulous! Applejack has made Rarity more practical over the years. And yeah, Sunset's leather jacket is like her security blanket. Just looks a lot cooler than walking around high school with a blankie

I feel like Solstice does a good job putting people at ease, yeah - he's been afraid for a long time! He wouldn't want that for them! But he definitely doesn't go to church. He used to worry he would burn in there until proven otherwise, but he's still not fond

As I may have said in the sports chapter - I went to a sports high school. I'm roasting sports schools out of love

"Combining the concerned pseudo-parent and rebellious teenager is a recipe for a glorious disaster named Sombra" He's got many sides to him! Protective Dad and terrifying monster could in fact be the same side

"Just like 'mom' used to make~" Aww, yeah - they had a private chef staff for most everything else, but the Princess brewed Sunset teas herself

Solstice has so many opinions about beverages!!

"I anticipate foreshadowing here." Me? Never.....

Okay, 1) Who says you're not Marvel Prime? I might be Marvel Beta! 2) Why, yes, it is good to know about immediate danger :D for reasons!

Bevin made some cool ass choices with the art, yeah!! Very noir!

"I’ll admit I don’t know what that thing is in the right side of the first pic and left side of the second pic." You're seeing a shot-reverse-shot. That's the other person's arm!

"Can’t take this fore-shadow-ing." :D

"Solstice is no longer acting. He’s never had the chance to actually be his true self until an opportunity like this presented itself." Damn, well-said! Exceedingly true!!

End of part I indeed!! The fact that chapter 11 needed to be split in 2 delights me - we've only just begun!

EftD Chapter 11 – The Devil in Canterlot High Part 1

I’d just like to say. What the fuck.

Also, this commentary in particular had me doublebacking a lot, so I’m doing it acknowledging that I know the Chapter's end. Also I’m remembering so many actual terms for the literary devices used but alas, I’ll leave the accuracy be for the time being. Also I decided to break this one up so it’s not the tumblr equivalent of 17 Word Doc pages in a row.

Sunset Shimmer shivered from head to toe and couldn’t hide it even if she tried. And she tried. If she could at all avoid her friends seeing her like this, she would. It came in spasmodic spurts, with only seconds of control in between, starting from her legs or arms and rocking up to her core. She took in shallow, longing-to-be-deep breaths to steady herself, but, as if to rebel against her, her body didn’t listen.

First off, great start really sets the mood for the rest of the time Sunset’s going to be here. Absolutely dead-on with how it goes. The start and end of this chapter is mirrored. It’s right there in the title card. The big twist, I just didn’t see it. Even more obvious since we haven’t been seeing Sunset without something filtering her true feelings and self! But now, right there with that paragraph and the end of that first sentence – her body is rebelling against her, it didn’t listen. It can’t listen because it’s under Sombra’s control. Or soon will be.

It made her love them for trying—seriously, on a level she’d only thought possible recently—

AH!

Time spent with her favourite boys - even in totally-not-really-therapy-wink-wink - is working!

“... and I guess, I dunno, I just want to help so bad…”

GOODEST OF BOYS

He’s good. I think we’ll finally have this solved.”

I initially read this as “He’s good at being a therapist”, but I also like seeing how it could be interpreted as “He’s just genuinely a good guy”, which he is!

Flash stared at her for a second, the reels rewinding in his head almost so viscerally she could hear the sputtered squeal, and then he smiled. “Oh. I got third. They stumped me on the word castling because I thought it had an e in there somewhere, but I was super proud I could be so brave. My dad took me out for ice cream afterwards.”

A cutie mark origin story if there was one for this Flash! And just another thing to note. Even though Sunset genuinely seems cold, it’s also symbolic of her fear.

Sometimes the Princess would even let her sit on the throne.

;~;

Flash took that as a permission slip to start monologuing aloud about tactical breathing: in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4. Of course, the music nerd in him counted it out like a 2/4 time signature. He even performed a demonstration of what that might look like, breathing to a beat of his own making.

Ngl, a while back I started reading this chapter. Then some shit happened, and I had to drive alone for 2 hours. It was a very emotional drive, and my adrenaline had me much more awake than I needed, but my mind came back to this bit. Kept me calm and kept my driving safe. Thank you for this <3.

Sunset let him. She thought she’d managed this breathing thing pretty well on her own all these years, she didn’t need a How to Guide. While the shakes didn’t stop entirely, she managed to calm them down to a level she hoped wouldn’t be perceptible.

I’m glad Sunset did let him, instead of saying to his face that she didn’t need a how-to guide. They both sorta understand each other in this way. Flash literally just said he wants to help so bad, but Sunset also didn’t want to be perceived as not being okay. Much more didn’t want anyone to say it out loud. So, he’s helping by telling her how to breathe when you have nerves but not pointing out directly that she seems nervous. Saying things out loud just hits so much harder. Guess that’s part of the point of therapy!

The door hung open after her like the toothy maw of a basilisk salivating strands of venom and ready to devour a fresh victim whole.

Speaking of perception… she’s really not perceiving this as a good thing lol. Cold shaking, shaking in fear like a helpless little mouse. And an actual mouse. NOT a ‘Tiny Vermin’. There’s a reason that boss is up a level after the Bone Hydra.

And Sunset would have been happy to continue staring off into the middle-distance, unreachable, but then, Timber Spruce slapped his hands on his knees, got up from his chair, and said, “You know what? Why not? Let’s get magical. I’ve got a few things to say.”

Sunset looked up then to see Timber send her a tired smirk before disappearing.

Absolute shocker. And absolutely love the way Timber went about this. Sometimes you just gotta dive right into the deep end to get used to the water. And of course, seeing all your friends jump in and then come out fine and in a good mood and the like, and you’re all that more likely to cave to the pressure. Timber especially so since he likes to also feel part of the Rainbooms.

“Would you jump into the mouth of a basilisk if all your friends did?”

“Well, if they got out and the basilisk spit did wonders for their general complexion and confidence, then yeah I guess I would.”

What would he say about her in there? What were they talking about? Closing the portal won’t take long. Ray and Scruffles need me to bring them, I’d have to get them first. If I close the portal, is that it? Could anyone open it again? Would the connection be severed? Would the crack in the sky disappear? What happens here when it’s gone?

She’s still on that?! Not even her girlfriend could convince her otherwise?!

Sunset knew with a cold certainty from her lectures and studies on the Roots of Magic that there was always a source. An origin, a cause.

I do not like that this certainty in particular is cold. Especially not with all the other ‘cold’ things going on. Also, I bet the origin is that damn horse statue in front of City Hall!

…(similar to the human economy, Sunset Shimmer understood little to nothing of human geography—and now she likely never would) ...

As a human geographer who also happens to be human, I find this very humourous. I do NOT recommend searching what I mean, it’s a rabbit hole of confusion and questioning as to geography’s place in academia (but fuck almost all of those Ivy League Universities, you know what university DOES include Geography among one of its VERY FEW master’s and doctorate programs? THE UNITED NATIONS UNIVERSITY! Guess actually helping people across the world through an interdisciplinary approach towards natural disasters under a changing climate isn't top of mind for them. Yes I'm bitter.)

Also would be funny if Sunset pursued geography as a result of going to NR (which apparently was important to military officer training in WW2).

This also makes the idea of “significant places of sorcery and love” especially interesting to me as a human geographer. We look into the human relationship with space, which we end up calling “place’. We assign value to it when we have this relationship, including emotional value. But these places can have different identities and values depending on the who its relating to.

What goes into those places of sorcery and love? If we think back to the Perfect Pear in the pony episodes, that is an example of assigning emotional value to a place. A place of love, where sorcery emerged, where these powerful interactions of two lovers, forbidden to be with each other but still so committed to being there anyway that they develop a place that was unique to them. But is there any place we’ve seen that could be classified as such in the human realm? Nightfall Reach certainly seems old, perhaps old enough to be classified so. And with Friendship being a core tenet, maybe there’s something there.

There’s likely something around Canterlot High, and that statue. Clearly the statue itself is imbued with magic. But did anything with strong enough love or sorcery exist in that space before the school did? Did it have to? So many relationships made, broken, by so many students coming in and out of that place, connected to a mirror. What other value might have been assigned here, and by whom?

In a small, cold place, she almost found herself excited for them. You go, girls. You’re going to be amazing.

OOF

She didn’t so much as say a word to her girlfriend or Flash before Timber appeared in front of her, hand outstretched.

Damn, I can’t even imagine what Twilight must be thinking after all that. It’s even worse knowing the first conversation after this will be through Sombra.

Sunset flinched and looked to her girlfriend, who sat beside her and, at some point, had taken Sunset’s hand, maybe to steady it. The little circles she revolved with her thumb stopped short.

Awwwwww!

Well she didn’t really mention much of the shakes since around the time Twilight came out, save for when Timber went in.

Solstice emerged from the office and his eyes billowed a ghastly gas-like steam. The crackle of it startled Flash in particular who ripped out of his seat, but neither Twilight nor Timber reacted.

Okay so, a bit of a development! Totally not at all concerning. Also totally not concerning that Twi and Tim are not concerned. sweats

Solstice waited for her like the ferryman at the perilous banks of the River Styx, lantern and steady smile at the ready.

Mouth of Styx starts playing

Sunset walking into hell, to face Hades himself.

Heart walloping against the confines of her ribcage, Sunset had to admit comfortable sounded so nice. Trying to stabilize one of her clammy hands with its partner, she nodded, mumbling, “Yeah, okay. Sure.”

Wow, really missing Twi’s hand, huh?

That made him smile, teeth pale like a full-moon in the shadow of night. Combined with his still demonically slitted eyes, Sunset fought the thought that Solstice looked almost animalistic and focused instead on the gentleness of his voice. “You can zip up your jacket, my dear, I don’t want you to freeze.”

Aaaahhh! Very werewolf-like. Indeed. I can see it be an apt metaphor for Solstice and his condition. The style and grace of the Sombra persona feeling more like a vampire, but the challenge of having something deep inside of you changing and turning you into a monster is something all too familiar for Sunset. The human realm has its own myths and legends, but she likely experienced so many of those myths made real back in Equestria. And, having dressed up like one for Halloween partly being the reason for her perceiving him this way. Or maybe its more of a Jekyll and Hyde thing.

“Tcht. No, see, I’d be offended. It’s kind of my look, so...” She gestured down to her open leather jacket in open rebellion.

Sunset’s willing to freeze before changing her look? Rarity will be so proud. Or disappointed since she could probably make it still warm while being fashionable.

Still, it’s a nice touch – Sunset’s here in her first counselling appointment, where it’s supposed to be a safe space to let yourself be comfortable enough to be honest with yourself and your feelings and the like. Where you can take off that figurative armour, literal in the case of Sunset and her rebellious identity, also being rebellious to the idea of counselling.

“Oh! Yes, that has to be frightfully frigid.”

I don’t like the implied tone here. Yes, the weather inside is frightful, but the other side of Sombra is so very much ALSO frightful. Maybe though, the fire inside that Solstice sets for the students’ souls will be so delightful.

She drank him in in full. It helped her own nerves to see the big bad opponent she was up against wore loafers like he was late for church service, wore his button-down not quite tucked into his belted slacks, and smelled like a coffee shop if it also used a wood stove. “Huh. You actually can’t feel cold?”

The BIG BAD… Churchgoer? More like wolf in sheep’s clothing. With Solstice being like that, it must’ve done both Flash and Timber a lot of good. A safe haven in a cold cold blizzard who emanates the woodsy-ness the latter likes, but speaks so very kindly, as the former would appreciate.

“Heaven knows the central heating could use an upgrade with me around to challenge it, but well. Public school.”

Okay so they can afford the special sports stuff but not heating?! I well… yeah no, that tracks.

But Solstice caught that. “Really, are you sure about your jacket? I wouldn’t want you to catch a cold in my office, I’d never forgive myself.” Sunset’s eyes went for a spin. “Think I’ll find a way to survive your office.”

laughing nervously

Solstice paused long enough to stare at her jacket’s zipper, as if tempted to zip it up himself. If he had telepathy or the sheer force of will, all bets might have been off. With the steam still billowing off his demonic eyes, he looked much angrier about it than he probably actually was. Or maybe it really did vex him that much, Sunset couldn’t say.

Combining the concerned pseudo-parent and rebellious teenager is a recipe for a glorious disaster named Sombra as he feeds on the anger from feeling a lack of control (or what I thought was anger, but is actually fear for her well-being).

Either way, he moved toward the kettle and basket of cookies. “Alright, it’s your decision. But speaking of dire choices: Can I at least get you anything? A hot beverage to keep warm?

Nothing like a hot beverage! Although I think that there should be a better word to define hot beverages than just “hot beverage”. I’ve been trying to get “café drinks” going here and there, but in this day and age? That can mean anything.

Sunset doubted the school counsellor would readily give her access to the type of beverage she really wanted to get through this. Fire down the throat always kept her warm, in a manner of speaking (especially if it was Nectar of the Gods, Sunset’s favourite Equestrian liquor; she’d never forget sneaking her first taste from the pools of Mount Olympus while on diplomatic missions with the Princess. Good times). She shifted on the plump couch cushion. “Tea’s good, if you have any. Camelmile?”

Who wouldn't want some Nectar of the Gods? I'm sure there'll be some at the coronation.

Whenever Sunset had an upset stomach⁠—her codeword for nervousness or feeling upset, honestly⁠—as a filly, Princess Celestia brewed her excellent tea. Trottingham chai, Zebrafrican rooibos, even a nice Griffonstonian oolong after a long day. It got to the point the sound of the kettle boiling in the hearth was enough to ease any irritation.

Just like 'mom' used to make~

Nodding, Solstice smiled around his own shoulder, back at her, setting up the mugs, not unlike a bartender.

Ah yes, the bartender, discount therapist!

His little wooden stirring stick whisked the cup in an erratic fashion. “Warping the minds of the youth with their overpriced... cake coffee. Oh, it sounds delicious, but what you’ve really gone and done is ruined a perfectly good pot of coffee and convinced swarms of innocent teenagers they’ve bought themselves a luxury item!”

He grumbled more into his own mug as he sipped to avoid an overflow before realizing; he swallowed his mutterings down with his coffee. “I have… a lot of feelings about beverages. Wine especially. But I suppose the point was that it’s nice to know I’m not the only ex-career student here.”

Recently I’ve come to appreciate whisky. I enjoyed it before, sure, but now I understand that among the connoisseurs, the best whisky is the one you like, and that includes whiskey ;)

But that does bring me to another observation – Sunset mentioned alcohol in her head before Solstice said it out loud. Foreshadowing about getting in her head? Or is it another point about how much they actually have in common?

It’s wild seeing how much coffee has really taken off though. I see a lot of similarities between wine and coffee connoisseurs. The sheer difference in variety of tastes based on where it’s grown and the conditions that gave rise to it – it’s terroir - and how it’s processed or even what you add to it in each minuscule amount.

Each student technically is a product of their own terroir. Even though the students are all different, they’re also similar in so many ways – that’s why they can empathize with each other despite those different experiences. But of course, with a unique terroir, it’ll get harder and harder to have an accurate read on knowing how someone else is feeling. As a geographer once said, "everything is related to everything else, but near things are more related than distant things." People who grew up in one place have much more in common than someone from a different place depending on what's available to them: the culture there, foods available, cost of things in the community, etc. But the processing of the coffee bean or the wine changes that too! As it goes through its life cycle, it started out somewhere, like all its neighbours, but slowly changed along the way as new experiences shaped it, and shaped the person.

And that’s why its important for someone like Solstice to be there. He talks to them and gets into the finer notes and details of people, even with the added sugar. His comment about cake coffee makes me believe he dislikes it because he dislikes how the uniqueness of each cup getting drowned out and taken away by fads among teens, making it harder for them to be open and honest with each other if all they're concerned with is the fad. Cause if you're not open and honest, how can you have an open and honest relationship with one another? With Sunset’s “look”, she’s dressed up like a mocha and refuses to let him or anyone else really know the core of what’s there. All that sugar added drowns out what makes everyone unique and beautiful in their own way. Unless you're a coffee connoisseur among coffee connoisseurs.

That and he's worried about them being manipulated.

“That’s true. I apologize. I don’t know. Call it an educated guess, then,” he told her, carrying over her mug. “Maturity is usually hard-won, much like degrees and education. Or forgiveness.” Solstice offered a smile as he gave her the drink. “Your friends speak very highly of you, Sunset. Your story is something of a legend around here. You are.”

Well at least Sunset has the forgiveness thing under her belt. The former she could get no problem! Just gotta figure out what that will be.

 “…I don’t do well with heights, not a fan.”

I anticipate foreshadowing here.

Would it be dramatic to say I’ve got a fear phobia? Sunset thought. “I’ve got a fear phobia. Only thing I fear is fear itself, you know? So if you’re wondering about your eyes, it’s cool, don’t worry about it. I’m not afraid of you.”

Sombra likes to be dramatic and uses fear as his primary weapon. If he’s not fear itself, then I don’t know what is for ya, Sunny.

“I’ll do my best to help you achieve that, then.” Solstice handed her a waiver of some sort, complete with clipboard and pen. “Everything you say here is completely confidential. The only exceptions to that are if I’m required to disclose case-relevant details in a court of law, or, and this is important, if you pose an immediate danger to yourself or others. At which point, I would contact the proper authorities for safety reasons.”

…

The authorities? Celestia, Flash’s dad would kill me if he knew I planned to leave Flash behind again. If Chief Magnus murders me, Flash might find out I’m leaving and try to stop me. “No.”

Including this part so specifically, leads me to believe the reason is twofold:

1. Our most glorious author, Marvel Prime, is presenting the reader with an accurate portrayal of the processes of going to therapy, based on her own knowledge and experience. This in turn, is also useful to anyone reading this in terms of knowing what to expect if they go in.

2. Foreshadowing. The callback back to good ol Detective Daddy-o, Flash Magnus, who probably has a case on her, and just needs a little bit more to bring it to court. The other element of “this is important”, is not just for her, but for the reader to remember. Because she gets body swapped again, she will ultimately pose said immediate danger to herself and others. Also, who knows if “proper authorities” can actually mean Princess Twilight and the crew bringing in some magic-ass kickin’. Seems like the proper authority to me.

Not that she had any plans on re-terrorizing the school or putting everyone’s lives in danger, but Sunset could almost hear the cell-doors clanking shut in front of her.

Wonderfully brought together with the art right in this section too! The shadow of the blinds making it look all too much like cell-doors. Signing her name? Signing her confession…. DUN DUN DUUUN.

“Oh-ho, no. Nope. We’re not doing this, no,” Sunset said, arms barred across her chest like a luxurious stay at the Tartarus Juvenile Detention Centre. “I’m not here to talk about me, I’m here to help my friends change back.”

And prison references continue! It all comes back together. All the Greek mythology references, combined with the justice system, coming together into that – the Tartarus Juvenile Detention Centre being the reason for the references and how this all feels, that she’s ultimately a bad friend and bad person, even if she’s not going to terrorize the school again not that she’ll have any say in that though. But also this whole thing could just be in of itself another way to foreshadow just that. Either way, she’s venturing through Hades to save her friends, but is willing to stay there if it means making things right.

Y’know it also kinda feels like Solstice is gonna pull out the ol’ Rorschach tests.

“Tell me what you see?”

Sunset proceeds to see either her kissing Twi, her strangling Timber, or Celestia disappointed in her.

Arms crossed. Sunset took in air just to sigh it back out like sand dragged back into the sea.

AND IT STILL MAKES YOUR FEET GRAINY. THERE’S ALWAYS A LIL BIT LEFT BEHIND IN YOUR SANDAL.

And a stop to say it’s lovely seeing this second picture right after. Solstice just across from the ‘imprisoned’ Sunset, showing the source of the cell-door imagery. Again, I’m no artist, but I feel like there’s a number of contrasts and comparisons to be seen here.

First, I’ll admit I don’t know what that thing is in the right side of the first pic and left side of the second pic. BUT It does connect the two – the way its coloured and the angle it’s on.

Second, the difference in line styling with each picture – the one feat. Sunset is softer, more rounded, wavy, especially when the shadow-prison-bars hit Sunset herself. Notably, the only parts of Solstice that are rounded are the two that are most influenced by Sombra.

Third, the way these two come together. It’s literally shadow prison bars. AND that’s what curves around Sunset. Her tea’s steam curves and is reminiscent of her hair, but curves towards Solstice. The parts of Solstice influenced by Sombra are his hair and his breath. They’re mimicking her – again a sort of foreshadowing, and also almost soul-like (yes I'm thinking Danny Phantom). Oh yeah also it’s like, half his face literally covered in shadow too. But not just any shadow, a shadow that reflects the Yin-Yang symbol – the darkness in the light, and the light in the darkness.

“Yes, precisely!” He leaned forward to the edge of his seat. “But the exact effect is dependent on you! Anyone can feel love for their friends, or joy, anger, fear—really, I believe you’re right, the intensity of your emotions correlates to the intensity of your magic. But if the power comes from you directly, it’s also my belief that exactly how it manifests is related to your individual psychology. Who you are, what those emotions mean to you personally.”

Okay, don’t like how he ended on fear there. Can’t take this fore-shadow-ing.

If Solstice’s individual personality affects how his magic manifests, does that mean his initial fear, perhaps fear of his father, helped make it what it is now? Would his guilt manifest differently, since that seems to be strong with him? Or maybe guilt is simply the aftermath of fear having been realized.

A stupid giggle bubbled to the surface. “I’ve had theories for years,” Solstice near-squealed, his eyes flickering back to their regular green, if only momentarily, and back again. “It wasn’t until I came here to help you students that I had any way of observing other samples besides myself! And the most marvelous part is I may have guided the students towards the answers, but they’re the ones to figure it out! And now they can learn to harness those powers for good! Emotional therapy meets magical theory!”

And here we see an example of it all playing out. Sunset mentioned acting as your true self as a form of creating strong emotions – and Solstice is no longer acting. He’s never had the chance to actually be his true self until an opportunity like this presented itself. He’s always had to act on stage, act a certain way in front of his dad, find this niche interest and be unable to share it, and he’s had to act like everything’s okay in order to not induce anxiety in anyone else, which would make him feel worse. He’s had to filter and mute himself. And thus, him acting as his true self allows him to regain control of his whole, true self back from Sombra. Allows him to be powered by magic through something stronger than fear. For now.

And that's the end of Part 1 of this chapter's commentary!

[dumpster-fire-deluxe]

Why Palpatine is autistic (headcanon)

Listen if I was diagnosed as autistic in 15 minutes without diagnostic assessment and by answering "eh, kind of" to 2/10 questions, then this man should be diagnosed ten times over

You can only disagree with me once you've read the whole thing <3

Part 1: DSM-5 official diagnostic criteria

Deficits in social-emotional reciprocity, ranging, for example, from abnormal social approach and failure of normal back-and-forth conversation; to reduced sharing of interests, emotions, or affect; to failure to initiate or respond to social interactions.

This criterium can include a lack of affective/emotional empathy. Also, when is Palpatine interested in the emotions of others beyond how it serves him?

Yes, he does seem socially adept. But this is something you can learn, literally. He's had a lot of training in how politicians act, how to convince people, etc. It's all an act. It's just a more severe form of masking.

And let's not forget: how much easier is social interaction when you can sense the other person's thoughts and feelings through the Force? No need to read their body language at all. You can feel what's going on and what they want to hear

Deficits in nonverbal communicative behaviors used for social interaction, ranging, for example, from poorly integrated verbal and nonverbal communication; to abnormalities in eye contact and body language or deficits in understanding and use of gestures; to a total lack of facial expressions and nonverbal communication.

Masking!! There are many moments with Palpatine where I'm like "ah, that there is very much a conscious expression, deliberately pulling those precise facial muscles, rather than something naturally happening". Same with a lot of moments of intonation.

Also, how often do you see him talk with his hands? When talking, his arms are usually rigidly at his side (or in T-Rex position).

Deficits in developing, maintaining, and understanding relationships, ranging, for example, from difficulties adjusting behavior to suit various social contexts; to difficulties in sharing imaginative play or in making friends; to absence of interest in peers.

This is specifically about equal peer relationships. Yes, Palpatine knows how to do official/business relations. You can learn that in political school or by copying others. There are rules & tactics & etiquette/protocols. But close, personal relationships?

You often see autistics in relationships with power differences, like master-apprentice/dom-sub relationships (in either role). That's a lot easier to navigate than equal peer relationships, which are a lot muddier.

Also, "absence of interest in peers". When have we seen him yearning for close personal relationships?

Stereotyped or repetitive motor movements, use of objects, or speech (e.g., simple motor stereotypes, lining up toys or flipping objects, echolalia, idiosyncratic phrases).

Palpatine does have some frequent finger tapping going on and he "worm walks" (swaying with either legs or upper body, unless focusing on walking straight and/or looking at the ground, like in the third image).

Insistence on sameness, inflexible adherence to routines, or ritualized patterns of verbal or nonverbal behavior (e.g., extreme distress at small changes, difficulties with transitions, rigid thinking patterns, greeting rituals, need to take same route or eat same food every day).

I don't think he has this one.

Highly restricted, fixated interests that are abnormal in intensity or focus (e.g., strong attachment to or preoccupation with unusual objects, excessively circumscribed or perseverative interests).

This is the big one. What neurotypical person would be able to spend every waking moment working on one singular interest (Sith Grand Plan/Dark Side), forsaking social relationships and such? Even passionate allistics wouldn't be so entirely consumed by one thing for years on end.

Palpatine also collects objects related to that interest (the Sith artifacts/artworks).

Once he's emperor he doesn't show himself much anymore but instead spends all day alone studying his special interest.

Hyper- or hyporeactivity to sensory input or unusual interest in sensory aspects of the environment (e.g. apparent indifference to pain/temperature, adverse response to specific sounds or textures, excessive smelling or touching of objects, visual fascination with lights or movement).

First of all, the depression robes from the original trilogy. That's all.

Second, I think in the Star Wars universe "sensory aspects of the environment" could apply to the Force too, in line with hyper-empathy & hypersensitivity. And guess who was born super sensitive to the Force?

Third, no neurotypical person has that kind of interior design. I'm talking about all the red. My guess is chronic under-stimulation, thus needing to be surrounded by a bright color.

Part 2: Miscellaneous/Non-diagnostic autistic traits

Gender non-conformity (always wears dresses and gives off such princess energy)

He often has T-Rex arms and when he doesn't, his arms are stiff by his side (stiff posture in general). When relaxed, the T-Rex comes out.

His father thought he was different from birth, something about Palpatine didn't appear "normal" to him

Autism & pattern recognition + seeing the inner mechanics of systems. This includes social/societal structures. Add in years of analyzing humans and their behavior/psychology. It makes it possible to see relations, predict actions, etc., either on an individual scale or a larger one.

In the same vein, good at analyzing (situations & people)

His father was said to be cruel and violent (in this house the Darth Plagueis novel is still canon, fight me). Autism + childhood trauma can turn quite intense, to put it mildly. In this case: no empathy + no attachment to other humans + learning to read people and situations very well to stay safe + tendency to rigid thinking/intense preoccupation + seeing everyone as an enemy + special interest that involves hurting others, combined with running into a Sith Lord during his formative years? Yeah, all the pieces are there.

Anyway, this headcanon is locked into my brain now and I simply can't unsee it anymore.

[ghostlycollectorchaos]

Why, for me, Monstrous Agonies is the best podcast in the world:

1- It's supernatural podcast

2- It's queer podcast

3- It's a queer supernatural podcast

4- It has very good metaphors about experiences that are as real as they can be, fantastic or not. It's about hard choices and communication and love, oh my god so much love.

5- The voice of the protagonist is amazing

6- Talk about the oldest and least used advice of all: communication. Talk about opening your mouth and saying this is where it hurts and this is how I feel and how do you feel in return? It's a reminder of how vulnerability can be a blessing in a society that sees it as a curse.

7- Listening to episode 35 is like being full of soup cooked by your best friend.

8- It reminded me that love, all kinds of love, springs up in the strangest places in the most impossible ways. It reminded me that loving is a miracle and it's the map and it's the route and the treasure and yes, yes, and we are nothing until someone loves us and yes, yes, yes that someone can be me.

9- Made me laugh like a hyena with laryngitis

10- It reminded me that being angry is important, because anger can make us fight for the one we love and anger can make you stand up for another and anger can make the world change and anger can be the person's eyes who sees injustice and stamps the feet and says “no! that 's not fair! and if it's not fair I will make it be!”

12- Lesbians, gays and they's

13- There are many things worth fighting for, but it is not my obligation to become a martyr for them and there is power in being soft and there is courage in thinking about your own safety, because for some just staying alive and breathing is an act revolutionary and a proof of resistance. There is no spit in the eye better than being happy and that's enough.

14- Fuck Capitalism

15- Fuck big companies

16- Boundaries and how to establish them: A practical guide with supernatural beings.

17- I am Brazilian and if you know where Brazilian culture comes from, you also know about the history of colonization, miscegenation, pain and uncertainties of a boiling mixture of peoples.

And that's why Monstrous Agonies episode 41 touched me so deeply, the idea of ​​not knowing where you come from or where you fit in, asking questions that only generate more questions or equally painful answers.

My great-grandmother was indigenous, but my sister is blonde and I don't know if the curls in my hair come from the blood that runs in my father's veins or that wets his hands and I spent so much time looking for who I was and what I would be like if it meant something or proved my worth or just made me belong to something, a community, a lifestyle, something I could stand on and claim as my own. Treating communities like boxes and struggles like labels is not a method of knowing yourself.

And that's why it's so beautiful to hear that your ancestry doesn't matter, that the world is big, the earth is vast and can welcome all of us and their differences and singularities. That I am me and there is no need to know much more than that.

There is a sense of belonging in this particular kind of not belonging.

And for giving me the opportunity to realize that, I thank you.

18- It’s like to take off your shoes and lie down on a very soft bed after a very long day

19- It is the auditory incarnation of “From the Latin root monstrum, a divine messenger of catastrophe, then adapted by the Old French to mean an animal of myriad origins: centaur, griffin, satyr. To be a monster is to be a hybrid signal, a lighthouse: both shelter and warning at once.” by Ocean Vuong.

20- Makes me happy

@monstrousagonies

[metalcorrosion]

Raging Power Zine’s Best Hard Rock & Heavy Metal Albums of 2022

Another year and another Best of list for Raging Power. With the Pandemic leaving many bands with so much time off, many of them had more time to write and record new albums since 2019. Sometimes down time can be a good thing. 2022, gave us a lot of great albums. So far, this is one of the best years for Heavy Metal albums in a while, and this is why my usual top 60 list for 22’ it the top 75 list. It could have easily have been 100 or more album. But, I really need it to keep it shorter.  This is an epic year to metal, as I predicted. This time, I have included E.Ps instead of putting them on a serpent list. Exclude as always, any albums that are reissues, live and remixes.  My friends, enjoy my list, and please, check out all of the bands that I have listed. I want to thank my friend Brad for keeping me loaded with music this year and suggesting some great albums for me to listen to.

1.       Abbath – ‘Dread Reaver’

2.       Amorphis – ‘Halo’

3.       Arch Enemy – ‘Deceivers’

4.       Autopsy –‘ Morbidity Triumphant’

5.       Behemoth – ‘Opvs Contra Natvram’

6.       Belphegor – ‘The Devils’

7.       BlackBraid – ‘Blackbraid I’

8.       Blind Guardian – ‘The God Machine’

9.       Blind Illusion – ‘Wrath of the Gods’

10.   Bloody Hammer – ‘Washed in Blood’

11.   Graham Bonnet – ‘Band Day Out in Nowhere’

12.   Corpsegrinder – ‘Corpsegrinder’

13.   Candlemass – ‘Sweet Evil Sun’

14.   Clutch – ‘Sunrise on Slaughter Beach’

15.   Cult of Luna – ‘The Long Road North’

16.   Dark Funeral – ‘We Are the Apocalypse’

17.   Darkthrone – ‘Astral Fortress’

18.   Decapitated – ‘Cancer Culture’

19.   Destruction – ‘Diabolical’

20.   Destroyer666 – ‘Never Surrender’

21.   Devil Master -  ‘Ecstasies Of Never Ending Night’

22.   Eight Bells – ‘Legacy Of Ruin’

23.   Fit for an Autopsy – ‘Oh What the Future Holds’

24.   Friends of Hell – ‘Friends of Hell’

25.   Ghost – ‘Impera’

26.   Goatwhore – ‘Angels Hung From The Arches Of Heaven’

27.   Grave Digger Symbol of Eternity’

28.   Gwar – ‘The New Dark Ages’

29.   Imha Tarikat – ‘Hearts Unchained: At War With A Passionless World’

30.   Immolation – ‘Acts of God’

31.   Imperial Triumphant – ‘Spirit of Ecstasy’

32.   Jesters of Destiny – ‘Distorting Everything’

33.   Jungle Rot – ‘A Call To Arms’

34.   Killing Joke – ‘Lord Of Chaos’

35.   Kreator – ‘Hate Über Alles’

36.   Lovell's Blade –‘ Deadly Nightshade’ ‎

37.   Machine Head – ‘ØF KINGDØM AND CRØWN’

38.   Tony Marti n –‘ Thorns’

39.   Mastodon - 'Hushed and Grim'

40.   Megadeth – ‘The Sick, The Dying… And The Dead!’

41.   Meshuggah – ‘Immutable’

42.   Messa – ‘Close’

43.   Midnight - ‘Let There Be Witchery’

44.   The Michael Schenker Group – ‘Universal’

45.   Napalm Death – ‘Resentment Is Always Seismic : A Final Throw Of Throes’

46.   Nite – Voices Of The Kronian Moon’

47.   Parkway Drive – Darker Still

48.   Rammstein – ‘Zeit’

49.   Sabaton – ‘The War To End All Wars’

50.   Satan – ‘Earth Infernal’

51.   SHAG –‘ Born Demon’

52.   Sakis Tolis – ‘Among the Fires of Hell’

53.   Saxon – ‘Carpe Diem’

54.   Scorpios –‘ Rock Believer’

55.   SepticFlesh –‘ Modern Primitive’

56.   Sigh – ‘Shiki’

57.   Spirit Adrift – ‘20 Centuries Gone’

58.   Spiritworld –‘ DEATHWESTERN’

59.   Soulfly –‘ Totem’

60.   Stryper –‘ The Final Battle’

61.   Tad Morose – ‘March Of The Obsequious’

62.   Telekinetic Yeti – ‘Primordial’

63.   Therion – ‘Leviathain II’

64.   Tokyo Blade – ‘Fury’

65.   Joe Lynn Turner – ‘Belly of The Beast’

66.   Undeath- ‘ It’s Time… to Rise from the Grave’

67.   Voivod – ‘Synchro Anarchy’

68.   Venom Prison - 'Erebos'

69.   Vio-lence – ‘Let the World Burn

70.   Watain – ‘The Agony and Ecstasy of Watain’

71.   Witchery - Nightside

72.   Wo Fat –‘The Singularity’

73.   Vante –‘ Vante’

74.   Yatra – ‘Born Into Chaos’

75.   Zeal & Ardor – ‘Zeal & Ardor’

  In Memory of:

Eric Wagner: In The Lonely Light of Mourning

Best cover album

Udo Dirkschneider My Way.

Best name for a band that I have heard in 2022

Telekinetic Yeti

[clownery-and-fuckery]

Of course its okay to share your commentary!! I'm glad to see other people's thoughts on this!! :D

The singular language use in the second episode was the main reason I made this post, tbh. I had held my tongue about it up until this point considering everything about Crosshair and his choices (I'll get into that in a second) but hearing him actually ignore his siblings (in a way) really annoyed me-

Wrecker used words like "people" and mentioned them throughout the episode, and while i can't pull the quotes directly from my head, it shows that there WAS consideration for the other two, but Hunter chose specifically not to acknowledge them?

The justification behind that could be that this is his way of grieving Tech (which, fair but still VERY frustrating that he still doesn't acknowledge it even when Wrecker DIRECTLY brings him up) and at this point, Hunter knows Crosshair turned against the Empire- like you said, he (might) have been able to come home with them if they had pushed- I find it really odd that despite that knowledge, he not only forgot about him, he pushed to not look for him- that's my own personal problem with that aspect, even if I understand the hesitating

Hunter being the "oldest" is definitely heavily a fannon decision, but it was confirmed in my head listening to them talk to each other over comms- Hunter is referred to as "Havoc 1" which would have been assigned to the oldest/one in charge imo- (it also disproved my theory on Tech being the youngest because he's Havoc 2 but I can dream !!) With Echo being older, its probably a case of the others listening to Hunter over him because he's the squad leader?

And the point that Hunter doesn't want to be a solider is a great one to remember!! I really liked seeing Pabu/the particular argument between Echo and Hunter about ideology, it was a dynamic that was a constant, consistent and gave both Echo and Hunter more depth- my only issue with this on Hunter's part (and- by extension, Echo but that's a whole separate point) was that Hunter made this major decision for Omega

It brings me back to my own frustrations as a younger sibling, it comes down to the standards. Hunter doesn't want to be a soldier, it's one of his main drives as a character- but why didn't it happen sooner? I know his brothers may have had mixed feelings about the war, especially once Echo appeared- the only instance of anyone in the Bad 'liking' the war was Wrecker's "We're just in it for the thrill"

But if they were "in it for the thrill" they could have had that adrenaline rush as mercenaries. Or bounty hunters. They didn't need the war for thrill- maybe it was conditioning, maybe there was a time where Hunter did enjoy the war in TCW and they scrapped it for TBB- but it frustrated me that Hunter wanted to act on leaving as soon as Omega came around, not before

Sure, if he hadn't met Omega, I'm sure he would have pushed for a quiet life, too. And the others would have followed- I just found that Hunter- the guy who fought in a war basically for his brothers, who never really wanted to stay- took so long to finally go

I'm definitely being biased on this point, but I don't really understand this part? He was a sibling(older or not) before Omega came around- he cared about his brothers, it doesn't make much sense to me outside of him not wanting to break rules (which we know isn't a problem for them..)

And the simplification of Hunter's whole character was understandably expected in fannon, at least at first, but seeing it in cannon too really got to me. He's so much more than that, and while the point was made that parent/child connections are very hard to navigate at first- Hunter is the only one who really latched onto that? It bothered me, especially after S2 where we were shown Omega to be fully capable

And the glossing over his siblings- Tech, may be down to grief, may be down to guilt- I hope we figure it out, instead of never talking about it. But Crosshair- I very much jumped the gun on that point

Crosshair did make his choice after Kamino fell, to stay- I had made this point thinking about the first time they left him, after the first episode, it hadn't even occurred to me that Crosshair made his own choice to stay the second time. Chip or no chip, the decision had to be respected, which I understand

But they knew he had turned. He had warned them, and while the hesitation was partially understood- had it not occurred to Hunter that the only reason they stayed off the Empire's radar was because Crosshair has lied for them? If he didn't, I'd be really angry tbh- if Crosshair lived, which they knew, if he had really been loyal to the Empire, he would have turned them in. He didn't. Hunter picking to ignore that and suggest it's a trap that Crosshair warned them to leave just– bothered me?? Because Hunter fought so hard to give him one chance, but having it rejected closed the door on him forever? Even after he knew he was a prisoner? Even after everything Tech did to try save him?

That was a major low blow, but I really can't comprehend how Hunter can justify ignoring Crosshair after all of that. He wanted to give up entirely after Tech, which is absolutely fine- but he's not given up yet. He's going to free Omega- if he had figured out Crosshair was with her this whole time, would he even bat an eye? Or would he leave as soon as he had Omega.

I hope season three proves me wrong about Hunter. I hope it shows me plain as day that I'm totally wrong and laughs at me for it. I loved who Hunter's character was, and I hope we see more of him being him, I hope we get to see him realise he isn't an extension of Omega, and I hope we get to see him mourn who he's lost, because he deserves to greive all his siblings.

Thank you so much for sharing your response!! This was really interesting to read, it gave me more insight on other aspects of Hunter I hadn't considered!! The anger is definitely still there, but I'm not overly frustrated about him anymore- just hoping for development in s3!!! It'll definitely be an interesting arc.

As promised, my commentary on Hunter.... to the people that like him, im sorry.

Spoiler warnings and the like, this is pretty negative aside from like maybe three sentences?? Feel free to leave you're own opinions on this too ofc !!! >:)

I dont like Hunter.

Actually, that's not entirely true, I liked him in TCW season 7, when he was that silly man who fucked droids around the place, took no shit, and loved his brothers. I like the Hunter who, not putting this nicely, had a personality.

This is not a dig on him as a character, it's a dig on how he was handled, writing wise

Listen, I totally get that the "rugged-man-adopts-a-star-child" trope is popular, and I do LOVE that trope, really I do- I just don't really think it was done that well here? It's bothered me since s1 of the Bad Batch, and I don't think it's going to get any better this season....

My only real problem with the writing inconsistency of Hunter being an older brother of three to "Omega this, Omega that" and while I agree childcare is SUPER difficult at the best of times, Hunter had four brothers who were equally capable of taking care of Omega, too. It just never sat right with me that taking care of her became his ENTIRE personality

Hes a soldier, who despite being completely out of his element, had a routine he strictly followed for the whole war. Yet he seemed to completely forget about that ?? Stressed or not stressed, that worn in routines and LIFELONG LESSONS should not have left his head as quickly as they seemed to.

The most obvious and frustrating example of the oversimplification of Hunter's character is with Crosshair. I cannot even BEGIN to describe my anger when it comes to Hunter and Crosshair. It mainly stems from the way he just FORGETS his brother is with the Empire. Conveniently never bringing it up unless someone else did it first.

As the oldest sibling and squad leader, I personally think Hunter should have been the one to bring him up. It should not have had to be specifically mentioned by another character for Hunter to discuss it. He loves his brothers, he loved Crosshair, broody or not, he should have brought it up AT LEAST once, imo.

We also see this complete disregard for Crosshair AGAIN in s3, now that we have seen Hunter looking for Omega and not ONCE mentioning Crosshair. Has he forgotten that they were originally going to find Crosshair??? That they never actually FOUND their brother ??????? Annoyed me so much, tbh.

What else annoyed me was the singular language he used during the whole episode. "She's part of our squad." "Hemlock took SOMEONE from us." He's completely and utterly disregarding the OTHER TWO SIBLINGS that the Empire took away from him !!!!! It genuinely frustrates me so much.

I know I'm DEFINITELY nit-picking here, but even when Hunter looked to Tech's goggles, it was in a "He should've been here to do this." Way, not a "He should be here." Way. That's his brother, who died looking for another that Hunter has forgotten.

Hunter's tunnel vision is probably one my least favourite things about the Bad Batch, if I dare even MENTION that- and I love this show. It means so much to me, but I just can't handle this particular part of it...

I have so SO much anger directed towards the treatment of Hunter by the writers. I want the Hunter who was devoted to his WHOLE family, who fought for ALL of them, who would have NEVER allowed Crosshair to leave in the first place. Give me that Hunter back.

(Saying this- I do not mind Hunter and Omega's father/daughter and brother/sister relationship !!! I do really enjoy it- in small amounts. The fact that Hunter became nearly an extention of Omega really just- threw me off his whole character, really)

I specifically pick to ignore this when I'm making anything. Hunter has been a sergeant of three idiots(named endearingly) for the entirety of the war. One child who wanders around should not have taken up 100% of Hunter's attention, ESPECIALLY when he was surrounded and supported. It just bothers me, idk

Anyway, thats my rant !!! Back to some positives soon, promise !! I just had to get this off my chest, it's been BOTHERING me.

[shinpredicts]

Pick a BTS Song Reading: April 2022 - June 2022 Reading

This is a general pick a card reading.

How to do this reading:

1. Stay calm. Take a few deep breaths if needed. Be in a quiet, comfortable place. Don’t get distracted.

2. Pick a song out of the list of BTS songs below. You can listen to them before you pick them if you have not heard of these songs before or if you have forgotten what these songs sound like:

a. Young Forever

b. Stay Gold

c. Blood, Sweat, & Tears

d. Euphoria

e. Singularity

3. If you feel that more than 1 song calls out to you, then feel free to pick another one or two more. I would not recommend picking more than 3.

4. Remember that this is a general reading so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t behind.

a. Young Forever

From April 2022 to June 2022, you will experience a lot of mixed feelings related to regret, moving forward, and letting go of the past. You will feel nervous about what the future will hold for you. You will also be very worried about your career path. You may be at the end of a career, your education, relationship, etc. You may also be starting a new life, career, education, etc around this time. There's either a start or an end to a situation.

You will be thrown into a situation where there's a lot of unknown. You will probably feel unsure of yourself at times. Some of you may experience some mental health struggles during this time, while others may experience some physical injuries or accidents.

You will also feel misunderstood from April 2022 to June 2022. It is also possible for you to say the wrong things during this time or do something that you will regret later. It is important to think carefully before speaking or committing to something. If you don't think you can really keep a promise, then don't say you will keep it because if you do, this will likely come back to bite you later in the future.

b. Stay Gold

From April 2022 to June 2022, you will get to know more people. You will also want to be more socialable and get out and meet more people too. You might attend more parties, networking events, etc. You might even start going on dating sites or apps or joining more clubs at school.

You will also want to improve more of your skills and will have more chances to speak to the public. You will be forced to communicate more with others. You may also be forced to learn new things or skills and may be pushed to improve too.

Now is also a time where you may meet some good mentors or get to know more people within the community or alumni network. You will probably be able to make some strides at work or at school. If you work hard you may see an improvement at work or at school. If you are still lazy, you will stay the same or get worse.

Now is also the time to get more proactive and assertive. You shouldn't be staying at home and being by yourself. You should be out there trying to network and expand your social circle.

c. Blood, Sweat, & Tears

From April 2022 to June 2022, you will feel a lot of conflict and drama related to friendship and more importantly, love. You will also be drawn to a different crowd or interest than you've normally been used to. You might also develop some habits, which could be good or bad. You will feel a lot of temptation too like you will find it hard to resist some things or some people too. You know those people or those things might be bad for you, but you will still keep going for those people or things.

If you are in love with someone during this time, this person will likely bring out the worst in you and will make you easily jealous and possessive. You will have a very strong desire to want to be with someone and will want to keep them as only yours. If this person doesn't return your feelings, you will keep wanting to convince them to be yours or to try to win them over somehow with touching acts, gifts, or affection.

If you are alredy in a relationship with someone, this relationship will likely go through some rough patches at this time. You may be planning on getting married and your plans for marriage are delayed or there are a lot of situations that happen that make it the planning difficult. You may also be tested of your loyalty or your partner may be tested of their loyalty to this relationship. You may face opposition from the parents or grandparents about this relationship or scrunity from othes for this relationship.

If you are not in love with someone during this time, you will more likely get addicted to something. This could be video games, some other new interest, social media, dieting, drugs, exercising, etc.

d. Euphoria

April 2022 to June 2022 will feel like a rollercoaster to you. There'll be some really happy and exciting moments and there will also be some very annoying, frustrating times. The frustrating times may come before or after the happy moments. It depends on the person.

There'll be some drama that you are thrown into, not by choice. It's likely that one of your friends or family will drag you into this drama or have you become the mediator. You may be forced to choose sides too. There may be rumors about you or lies told about you from others. Your reputation may be examined during this period of time.

There will also be some matters related to the family that you will probably have to deal with. This may involve a parent's or a sibling's or a relative's or grandparent's problems or situations. This might involve finances, love, health, etc.

e. Singularity

April 2022 to June 2022 will feel more isolating for you. You will want to lay low and retreat to your own shelter. You will spend more time alone and will want to reflect a lot. You will also take this time to think more about the future and plan for it.

If you are normally super busy and don't have much time for yourself, you will either take a break/vaction or you will be forced due to some situation to slow down. This forceful stop may be your body becoming weak and you having to recover by resting.

You will also use this time to learn more about yourself and to cut out toxic ties from your life. It's also possible for you to lose some friends during this time. It's also possble for you to move away from your home to a different, foreign place to start afresh.

You may spend more time doing activities by yourself like journalling, hiking, running, biking, etc. You may also go on more dates by yourself too like watching a movie by yourself.

[touhoulostword-journal]

Blue Goodbyes | Artist: Yumeno Rote

Story 1 "Vile and ludicrous is the sight of the fake tomb and stage made from the corpses of the gods." "Truth" so often is vile and ludicrous, both in the human world and in the gods' world. How wonderful it would be if you could clearly define what is real from what is fake. sigh I'm sorry for complaining. Won't you listen to me a little before you go? It would help take my mind off things. I don't know whether to call Kanako Yasaka one half of me, my partner, or me in a different form… On second thought, I am her and she is me. That's all that needs to be said. In contrast to her, I have a man's name and am a god who features in tales of great bravery. (That's why they are included in the Nishin Yakudaku myths that detail the agreement between Amaterasu and Ame no Koyane.) I heard people like you are referred to as marebito. I can't say I know much about them, so I'm afraid I can't help you on that front.

Story 2 It seems that the Child of Miare is of the opinion that divine spirits should be clearly distinguished from the Yaoyorozu no Kami. But supposedly, her method for doing so was not entirely the same as the half-youkai antique store owner's. …Why do I know those two, you ask? The Child of Miare is the reincarnation of Hieda no Are, is she not? So it's only natural that I know of her. As for the antique store owner, he's one of those youkai who can read the memories of tools, correct? I heard about him from a god who resides in tools since, while I might not look it, I'm also a god with a fairly deep connection to tools. There are other methods for dividing the gods, such as into the Kunitsukami and Amatsukami or the native gods and the foreign gods, but these, too, fail to make clear distinctions. There will always be those who exist on the border, as well as those whose classification differs depending on the situation and conditions you apply. Even the old, outdated gods are complex and intriguing.

Story 3 Divine spirits are said to be ghosts that have attained divinity, as well as the deceased form of those who have become gods. However, fully-realized desire spirits, which originate from humans, and mere god spirit fragments, such as "bunrei", are also known as divine spirits. A singular explanation on this topic does not exist. It may be possible to refer to all spirits that acquire faith as divine spirits. The spirit and the body are opposites, but since divine spirits can possess false corporeal bodies, just as ghosts can, finding a solid definition may be challenging. Using ghosts as a reference point to explain divine spirits could lead you to believe that divine spirits are all gods who were once human. This is because only humans can become ghosts. However, bunrei, natural spirits, and the souls of animals and plants could also be considered as types of divine spirits that, despite not being human, act as if they were. For now, I shall state that both ways of thinking are possible, and neither is wrong…

Story 4 Yaoyorozu no Kami are gods who retain their original power from before they were named… Or so it is often thought. Divine spirits may or may not be included in this definition, with there being explanations for both schools of thought. The explanation as to why they wouldn't be included exists because a significant portion of the famed divine spirits were once human. Humans who become gods basically cannot avoid having names. This is because, given an absence of extenuating circumstances, it's impossible for a praised and respected human not to have a name. With that being the case, Yaoyorozu no Kami, who are not restricted by names and possess almost all of their original power, seem more likely to be gods who were not former humans, or gods whose time as humans lies in the distant past. The layering of history is a purifying force… Some gods may acquire strength by having their names forgotten. But things are slightly complicated by the fact that, if their names are forgotten, faith in them dwindles. This means that a clean distinction, such as "divine spirits are personal gods and Yaoyorozu no Kami are natural gods," cannot be made. In fact, it may be safer to assume "Yaoyorozu no Kami" refers to a diverse group of gods beyond count.

Story 5 "With the gods in Heaven, all is well on Earth." That's likely an example of a theory from the outside world about the existence of gods. Setting aside the necessity for faith, perhaps the gods would be happy with humans thinking that way about them. But that's not the case when it comes to the relationship between gods. Through the spacetime of culture, gods are connected―at times, loosely, and at others, rigidly. The hall of worship is like a shrine's entrance hall. The gods don't live there, but they will appear there when the bell is rung for them. It's also the perfect place to invite new gods in. The gods actually reside in a place called the inner sanctuary. Shrines that appear not to have an inner sanctuary are often built in front of mountains or the like. That mountain then serves as the inner sanctuary, or may even be the god the shrine was built to worship. Speaking of which, Kanako lives on a mountain, not in an inner sanctuary, right? And that mountain isn't behind the hall of worship but in front. I guess she does as she pleases. Everything was made of shintai to form a spiritual structure that is far too special. It's almost like Noah's Ark. But if that's the case, then we are both the planks used to build the arc, as well as the animals that boarded it. That would make the arc's main engine none other than Kanako Yasaka.