okay i have to say i hate emily. shes a bitch and i hate what she did to jamie and gray but i cant deny her character is so fascinating. shes literally like if greed was a person?
dont get me wrong as much as i hate her i understand the whole risk taking thing and wanting those experiences she never got to have BUT saying that she didnt need two boyfriends??? she literally could have experienced all the same things she did with one. thats why shes greed. she just took and took everything. from both of them and rebecca too.
but i just dont understand why she had such an effect on everyone? like avery describes her as pretty but she also said she was nowhere near as beautiful as rebecca. is it because she was sick and everyone felt bad? but like even then i cant imagine emily being a pleasant person to be around so i dont get how she made friends with anyone let alone dated two people 😭 but that could also be because we never met her? like we don't really know anything about her which is also really interesting to me. we know of her but that's only everyone's versions of her.
on a different note i keep thinking about the way jamie and gray had different feelings for her. like i just think that while jamie did love her but he didnt love her, you know? gray did. i assume thats why jamie wasnt as affected by eve, he didnt love emily the same way gray did.
jamie feels that way for avery so while eves appearance surely shocked him it still didnt take over and bring up old feelings (for a completely new person lmao)
(i also do know that he knew about eve before but theres still something different between hearing things and seeing them)
jamie and avery are perfect for each other but thats a different thought too. i'm so glad they never really fought because of eve (thank god, i would have cried)
but back on topic, i doubt emily loved them back. like, i feel like its the sort of situation where she just wanted to feel wanted. she probably mistook that for love and assumed she wanted both of them? but its all she ever had growing up too? familiarity? like its suggested that her parents were completely focused on her their whole lives and loved her (she was their miracle baby sort of though so i do kinda get that) but also like i wholeheartedly believe everything starts with the parents.
they were such a big influence in her life, they gave her everything, sacrificed everyone and everything for her and kept her happy. this comes back to the greed thing too. they gave her this idea that everything would bend to her will and she would always get what she wanted. (if you can't tell i have strong feelings about the influence parents have and how they raise their children cus it literally dictates someones whole life until they have clarity smh)
i think the whole jumping off the cliff thing too was like her acting out. she reminds me of gray in that way, she was losing control and she needed to do something she wanted to regain it. she knew she couldnt handle it but she couldnt handle not getting what she wanted more. idk if that makes sense but shes like trying to prove to herself and everyone else that she was fine with jamie breaking things off, that she could handle not being wanted and adored regardless of her actions and she was losing control of everything ig? idk i just think its really interesting the way she took things to an extreme because i imagine she was probably trying to do something else, something worse than what she feeling to get it to go away? emotions are so interesting in that way.
like rebecca (in her mind) was turning against her, jamie was leaving her and her parents would have stopped her from going with gray if they had known and at the time that was (hinted at) being what she really wanted to do and they were all telling her no. she took the only thing she had left to control (gray) and was trying to prove she was fine.
i cant put into words how many layers all of these characters have like jlb wrote such a wonderful series and i cant stop thinking about all the characters. i have so many thoughts running through my head and i could write a take on everyone ☹️
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as a firm transmasc tsukasa truther. i like to believe that his first transmasc awakening was seiichi amami and his second transmasc awakening was kaito but he was completely oblivious that it was, in fact, trans awakening until last year of middle school
tsukasa age 7, staring at seiichi amami's performance: wow he's so cool i wish i was just like him :) (because i want to be a star and make saki smile, obviously)
tsukasa age 9, after kaito v3 has released: wow he's so cool i wish i was just like him :) (because he's my favorite vocaloid and a big inspiration for me, obviously)
tsukasa age 14 after he got hit by the realization that "i wish i was just like him" is actually on a bit more personal level:
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cursed au y/n?? Muppets au where Jamil is the token human lol
bad dream(?)
EDIT [3/4/24 hi] bc i was lookin thru art the other day and. i fear i might have been subconsciously remembering this post when i drew this fkdsjlfjkdslj ;A;??? i think i was actively thinking about those posts on tumblr that go around sometimes that are like "if [whatever media] was remade by the muppets, who would be the token human?" and that's what sparked me to be like "haha what if twst was muppets, who would be the straight man human, jamil would be funny" and led to me drawing this,,, but then when i found that post again the other day i was like oh god,,, the similarities... and i def saw that post in the past so it's possible there was influence and i just Forgot The Origin... WHOOPS AND OOPS IT WASNT INTENTIONAL ;;;A;;;. . . .. . ...
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Susan foreman is such a weird character to me. She's technically the whole reason the plot of the entire series kick off, but dosent have much impact on the plot beyond that, with her constantly playing damsel in distress and isn't allowed to do all that much by either the charcters or the writers, which sucks! Susan, in concept is such an intresting character! I do like her! It's just that the writers did so little with her at the time when she could of been so much more.
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Something I really like about Rose Quartz's characterization is how dedicated the writers were to making what she did morally grey. Idk it would have been really easy for the twist to be she was Just Evil, especially learning she was related to the main villains, but no they created this very vague character who even in her appearances feels mysterious. If anything Rose is the one thing that is less clear to me after my rewatch, because now seeing the nuance in her character pulls me out of a black-ane-white view of her and into one that is just... foggy.
But a vibe I do get from Rose, is that despite clearly being incredibly compassionate, she's someone who lacks empathy in the case of the ability to fully realize others' autonomy and thought processes. There's just a lot of decisions she makes that feel aloof in an odd way, and when combined with how childish she can be it can give the impression she sees everything as a game. But it's still clear that she cares and is genuinely moved by the Earth, and when her entire truth is revealed you can see how ideologically honest she was. Even if it feels like her beliefs are just so she can have fun, but that is part of freedom, the freedom to vibe and explore and do silly things she couldn't.
That attitude clearly just comes from her position as Pink Diamond. It was an oppressive role emotionally, but not as literally oppressive as the lives of those around her. I think her relationship with Pearl is where I find the most of the part of me that sees her as compassionate but unempathetic. Pink can't fathom what it's like to have been born to be an obedient servant and how that would cloud Pearl's judgement. How telling her "I'm going to fight for this world but you dont have to" would mean nothing to her because she is still obsessed with her, how entering a romantic relationship with something while they're still effectively your servant is unhealthy, or how spending her life flirting with other men would probably tear your servant-to-lover-to-ex up inside lmao. With the first she obviously meant to be giving her a choice because she cares about Pearl, but she can't understand how to truly give Pearl freedom of choice she can't treat her like a fully freethinking person. With the second she doesn't understand how her power has an unhealthy impact on her bond with Pearl. And with the last it's not at all that Rose isn't allowed to move on, but I just always found she has a lack of awareness of Pearl's jealousy and misery that's a bit inappropriate. Not that you can't assume she has already let Pearl down easy or cares about her coping, but it's never shown, which feels like a deliberate choice.
I'm working on a more organized theory about Rose's characterization, but it is deeply fascinating. Her and Pearl's relationship is as well, I feel like it's sometimes characterized as just a mean jealous ex situation but like it's way more fucked than that, and is a great exploration of power dynamics, obsession, and grief. Love me some toxic doomed yuri.
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