#i should probably try to paint him myself lmao

[irascible-iridescent]

Sorry I changed my avatar but I want my blorbo there!!

[reiderwriter]

Unfair We're Not Somewhere

Chapter Eight of I Can't Help Myself

Summary: With a little bit of help from someone who could relate a little bit too closely to your situation, Y/N tries to come clean. Tries.

Warnings: Mentions of pregnancy symptoms/ general pregnancy things, unsub mentions, plot.

A/N: Chapter Eight! I'm so excited for where the rest of this series is going to go, though I do feel like people are going to be a bit annoyed by this one lmao. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below or in an ask! Don't be too mad...

Masterlist || Add yourself to the tag list

You sat quietly in the clinic as you waited for the pharmacist to fill your prescription - a simple pregnancy multivitamin that was supposed to help your food go down, make your hair shinier, and fix all your problems.

You wondered if the bottle could tell Spencer you were pregnant. You wondered if it could make him magically okay with that and prepare him for fatherhood, too. 

Your phone buzzed, and you surfaced from the field of thoughts you'd been lost in as you checked it. 

“Outside,” an unknown number had sent. You took that as your queue, stood up, and left the clinic, trying your best to avoid looking back at the small boy Spencer had been playing with. 

You weren't sure if you were going to have a boy or a girl yet. You didn't mind either, though you'd always envisioned yourself with a big enough family that you assumed at least one of each was inevitable. Though even you had to admit how stereotypically nuclear that was, and how only 18% of the country was living that was lying anyway. 

You shoved psychology from your head for a few minutes and let yourself breathe.

“Y/N!” JJ signalled from the driver's side of her still running SUV. She waved slightly, and you smiled politely as you quickly paced around to the side of her vehicle and got in. 

“Hi,” you said, unsure if you should introduce yourself or not. She'd been in the office the day you'd been taken into custody (protection), but you still had yet to speak to her. She'd been exempt from protective duty so far due to her status as a senior field agent and the fact that she had two kids and a husband at home waiting for her. 

You were sad she was the anomaly in the BAU, the only one with someone waiting on her. 

“I'm Y/N,” you said, still unsure if you should hold out a hand or not. You hadn't made the best impression on most of Spencer's colleagues, and while you didn't think there was much point in trying, you still couldn't bring yourself to be intentionally blasé. 

“I know, you're all we've been talking about for weeks,” the woman laughed, pulling out of the clinic car park and smiling at you. 

“Oh, right. Case. Of course, I've heard you probably know more about me than I know about myself.” 

“We have a profile, sure, but that's not what I meant.” 

You nodded awkwardly and stared out the window for a second, the sky darkening slightly as it prepared to rain. 

You drove for a few minutes before JJ spoke up again. 

“I don't know if Emily told you, but it's actually my day off today,” she said, turning off into a cul-de-sac you'd never seen before. 

“Oh, oh my god, I'm so sorry. I could've just got a taxi or something or just… gotten over myself. You didn't have to-” 

“Yes, I did,” she looked at you for a second, cocking her head to the side in a gesture that said, ‘and you know why.’ It was a look only a friend would give, and you felt an instant connection with her. 

How had Spencer found so many wonderful, big-hearted women to surround himself with, and how could you get in on it? 

You supposed, by letting him get you pregnant, you'd probably found a cheat code for whatever the answer might have been. 

“Anyway, it's my day off, so I promised my boys a fun day at home with mommy. We're doing finger painting and macaroni art. I hope you don't mind getting messy.” 

“Wha-? Me? Oh. No, not at all,” you tried to seem nonchalant, but your heart suddenly beat faster now that you were faced with this unexpected opportunity. As a lecturer, you'd been surrounded by kids professionally for years now. 18 to 21 year old kids. The kind that already had defined morals, world views, and, secretly, alcohol tolerances. The last time you'd encountered any kind of child younger than 18 was when you yourself were under 18.

The joys of toiling away at a doctorate for the better half of your adult life. You knew how to talk to professors and scholars. You were absolutely scared shitless of interacting with a kid. 

“H-How old are they?” You asked, trying to sound polite but falling somewhere between anxious and terrified with a simple stutter. 

“Well, Henry is turning 8 in November, and Michael is just about 22 months. He's just about talking, which is as fun as you can expect.” 

Her voice was tired, but there was genuine affection there, love for her kids and pride. You wondered if your voice would change if you'd suddenly begin speaking like that, too, about something other than a paper submitted to a journal or a job opportunity. 

She pulled into a street parking space and turned off the engine as two bright haired little boys came bouncing up the path of their garden to greet her, stopping at the gate. 

“Mommy! Michael got glitter on the carpet, and Daddy said we shouldn't tell you.” 

“And you have no sense of loyalty when a pretty face comes around, do you?”

Hopping out of the car, you heard JJ's husband drawl as she greeted him with a kiss. She'd probably only taken half an hour to pick you up, but they were still greeting each other so warmly. For a second, you wondered what that would be like before you remembered throwing yourself into Spencer's arms the night before. Your face heated as you stood awkwardly at the side of the car, trying not to cradle your stomach as you watched the family interact. 

Would your baby ever get that tall? Would it have brown eyes like Spencer, or one's more similar to your own? His hair was curly. Maybe your baby would get hair that waved like his, too. 

After all, JJ's kids seemed like perfect compromises between her and her husband. Other people's kids didn't, though. You wondered a lot of things before JJ gestured you over again. 

“Henry, Michael, this is Aunt Y/N. She's going to do those crafts with us today - after we've locked away the glitter and thrown away the key.” 

You laughed as she wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pushed you forward into the chaos of two kids under ten. 

You were a little startled as the smaller one - Michael - grabbed your hand. He had a pacifier in his mouth, though he was probably outgrowing it, and he stared up at you with big, wide eyes, blinking and sizing you up as he toddled along beside you. 

Your heart grew three sizes, and you felt sorry for ever being afraid of interacting with the kids. 

JJ whispered to her husband quickly as you entered the LaMontagne household, and he greeted you quickly. 

“So you're Spencer's lady friend. It's nice to meet you. It's nice that you're real. Honestly, I was getting a little-” 

A look from JJ cut him off, though he did still seem a bit confused. 

“I'm sorry, am I under the wrong impression? JJ said you were pregnant with Spencer's baby, y'all aren't…” 

“Oh my god-” you whispered, suddenly panicking again but whispering just in case. You weren't sure if the pair was religious, and though you certainly weren't, it probably wasn't the best time to blaspheme. You needed as much god as existed in the world. 

“So, does everyone know?” You asked JJ, trying to keep your voice bright and calm, so Michael didn't take too much of an interest and grow frustrated by hushed tones. You knew enough about child development and psychology, it translated over, right? 

“Everyone who's observant. Luke noticed the pregnancy vitamins in your bag, Tara was talking about your mood swings in the office the other day. I guess you told Emily earlier, and I have two kids.” 

You nodded at the answer. 

“And Spencer?” 

“You haven't told him yet?” JJ asked, slightly surprised. 

“If I told him, you'd know.” 

“Well, you're right on that. He's not the most easy-going during pregnancy,” JJ laughed and steered you into the living space, where your de facto art studio had been set up for the day, along with the offending glitter bomb. 

“Really? You thought you could keep that a secret?” 

“Well, of anyone was going to find it, it was going to be my beautiful, smart, funny, profiler Wife,” Will said, giving her a small peck on the cheek as she rolled her eyes at him. “I'm clocking in now. Call me if you need anything.” 

You waved him off, and sat down with the kids. 

JJ started the craft and then planned your hasty escape as the two boys were enraptured by making the perfect macaroni necklace, dusting it in objectively too much glitter as they proudly created their art. 

In the kitchen, she handed you a mug, and you sipped it quietly as she began again. 

“So, you're not dating?” 

“Nope.”

“And he doesn't know you're pregnant?” 

“No.” You took another sip and shifted from one foot to the other. 

You knew what was coming next. It was what you'd gotten next from Emily, from Penelope, from yourself when you'd thought about it for longer than ten seconds. You needed to tell him. 

“Okay. What's your next move?” 

You were so shocked you almost splashed the hot tea over the mug you held, close to burning yourself as you turned to face her. 

“I… what?” 

“Well, what's your next move? You're what, five months along? You're not going to be able to hide it for much longer. And you have to think about maternity leave, your hospital stay, and names, and who's going to drive you to the hospital. And obviously, how you're going to pay the hospital fee, and then custody and child support.”

“Oh god…” 

“And you also have to sort your relationship out with Spencer. So where are you starting?” 

It wasn't a question that didn't have an answer. JJ was staring at you, waiting for one as you opened and closed your mouth, head suddenly so empty you almost forgot what you were talking about. 

“He doesn't like me,” you suddenly blurted and wished you hadn't, face crumpling as you physically cringed at your own words. 

“Y/N, he was telling us about your toothbrush yesterday. Part of the office has a theory that he made up this case as a reason to get closer to you.” 

Again, you felt the heat blossom on tour skin as you looked away, taking another sip. 

“We don't do anything but argue.” 

“You do at least one other thing,” JJ said, hands on her hips as she confronted you. 

“No, that doesn't count. We were still arguing while we were doing…that.” 

“TMI,” she groaned as you fanned yourself. “Y/N, I know for a fact that Spencer is at least half in love with you. If you're absolutely sure you don't feel the same way, you need to at least let him down easy.”

“I…. I don't know. He's infuriating sometimes, but then he's so smart and annoying. But he's pretty great at comforting me. And the, uh, the other stuff, that was good, too.” 

“Don't need to-” 

“Like really good. Like, I'm not surprised I ended up pregnant practically first time good-” 

“Back on topic, please!” JJ whisper shouted, throwing her hands up as you zipped your mouth shut.

“You like him,” she said. 

You sighed and finally gave in. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I like him.” 

“Great. What next?” 

“Next, I tell him I'm pregnant and make him hate me for a while.” 

She patted you on the back and poised you another mug of tea before leading you back over to the kids and sitting beside them at the table. 

“We can plan something later. For now, macaroni art is calling.”

You weren't sure if it was the stern, practical pep-talk from JJ or the little tiny grasp of your hand from Michael. Maybe it was even Henry's goodbye of ‘see you soon, Auntie Y/N’ that had you suddenly invigorated, but you suddenly kicked yourself into gear. 

The pregnancy wasn't going to put itself on pause while you worked up the courage to tell Spencer about it. You had to do it. 

JJ dropped you off at home at 6 p.m., knowing that Spencer would be back at the apartment shortly. 

“You're sure you don't need me to stay up there with you? The commute can get a bit long this time of night, Spencer could be anywhere between 15 and 45 minutes.”

“No, I think… I think I need some time to think about how I'm going to do this. I need some alone time.”

She nodded quietly and sent you off after calling Spencer and giving him an update on your whereabouts. 

You paced the apartment wondering what the best option was. 

You could go for the bookshelf again, though it was still organised into your first message. You'd not moved a book in that stack at all, and surprisingly, neither had Spencer. 

Running into your room, you grabbed the pair of baby shoes you'd thrown into your bag from your apartment. Maybe if you left them on the shelf next to the books…? 

You put them there and frowned, wondering if he'd be able to see them from the door when he walked in. He was so used to the surroundings of his house that he really didn't check for irregularities. 

You moved them to the coffee table. Then you wondered if you should just hand them to him when he walked in. 

“Spencer. I am..pregnant,” you practised, looking into the bathroom mirror as you tried to force a smile. 

“Spencer. We're pregnant. No, not a chance,” you sighed. 

“Spencer, I have a parasite growing in me. I've had it for five months now, and then I'll have it for another four and hopefully a long time after that as well.” 

That one was mostly a joke. Mostly. 

“Spencer, I… We're going to have a baby.” You looked down at your bump again and decided that was probably your best option. It wasn't a state. It wasn't a condition or a parasite. It was a baby. 

You rubbed your stomach again and looked up, wiping away tears from the corner of your eye as you composed yourself again. 

The doorbell rang, and your heart race picked up. It was time. Spencer was home, and you were going to tell him. 

Suddenly, you were filled with excitement, with happiness. You ran to the door, stepping on the sofa to get there quicker as you ran to pull it open. 

Maybe it was the pregnancy brain fog, but you forgot where you were. 

Spencer Reid lived in this apartment. He didn't need to knock on the door or ring the doorbell. He'd never done it before. But you'd already swung the door open quickly, and you were so relaxed and ready for it to be him that when a hand extended and covered your mouth with a cloth, thick with a scent that had your body protesting, you could do nothing but crumple to the floor with your hands cradling yourself, protecting the life growing within you. 

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[jollyinha]

50 (+3) Facts About My Rook Listener (aka Félix)!

Because I love him in a hiperfocus kind of way 😭💙 If you want to see how he looks like, go to my yuurivoice tag, and you will find all my listeners! Although I probably should make an updated version, he has gotten a 2.0 version ever since... Also, tagging @itsargyle since they suggested taking other YV fans! I'm... Too shy to tag anyone else tho lmao

Anyway, here goes my big infodump on my favorite sunshine boy:

1 - Hey, I'm Félix Torres... Or not, because that's my middle name, and my actual name is Victor. But I'm not that fond of Victor, so I go by Félix!

2 - Victor was my mom's grandpa's name, and Félix is a tribute to my dad, whose name was Feliciano.

3 - Thanks to the acute accent, the correct pronunciation of Félix would be "feh-liks", not "fee-liks". Oh, and the "c" in Victor is mute. It's Vitor. But sometimes even I forget that it isn't supposed to be spelled like the gringos do, haha!

4 - My mom is Brazilian and my dad was Colombian. I was born in Brazil (Aracaju in Sergipe, to be more specific), but have been living in the USA for most of my life now. I used to spend the holidays in Colombia as a kid, but haven't been there ever since dad passed away... I really should pay it a visit again soon, though. It's a real nice country.

5 - I speak native Portuguese, fluent English and intermediary Spanish. I've been studying ASL (as of right now I just know basic stuff like "hi", "how are you?", how to introduce myself... But hey, at least I know the whole alphabet off the top of my head!) and French too, but it has been hard to find some free time... And when I do have it, I always end up drawing, crafting, cooking... Duolingo's owl wants to eat my ass.

6 - Speaking of which, these are my favorite hobbies! Drawing and painting are main passions in life, though. I've been in love with art as far as I can remember. I was in a few-years-long hiatus when it came to painting, only came back to it recently, but have been drawing non-stop ever since I was a little boy!

7 - When it comes to crafting, I enjoy many aspects of it... I've been really into papercraft these days. Origami, paper dolls, collages... But I also really like jewelry making and fabric painting (even if I find it so damn hard, haha!). I just love personalizing things in general. Sometimes, I see a piece of furniture, have an idea and just have to put my personal touch.

8 - I also know how to sew, but I can't say that I'm a big fan. I've tried crochet once, per example, and almost fell asleep on the couch. It's just a bit boring to me... But I'll gladly sew back a button or fix a hole if you ask nicely!

9 - And, last but not least, I love cooking! Not as much as I love to eat, but anyway. I picked up cooking as a way to deal with my pyrophobia and to bond with my uncle (he owns a restaurant!), and really took a liking to it... And modesty aside, I'm damn good at it!

10 - Speaking of which... I'm a bit of a bottomless pit when it comes to food! I'll eat (mostly) anything, am willing to try (mostly) everything and am hungry 24/7. Please, feed me.

11 - My favorite food is kind of specific, but: I love Thanksgiving pies. And breakfast foods. But anything that's chicken or has corn is also very damn good.

12 - I don't really like fruits. Most of them feel either bland (apples taste like NOTHING!) or straight up gross. I hate, HATE peach. Mango, guaba and pineapple too. Disgusting. I'm team vegetables all the way. Lemon and watermelon are the only ones that get a pass.

13 - My favorite ice cream favorite is chocomint!

14 - When it comes to drinks... I like coffee, as long as it has milk and unholy amounts of sugar (hate bitter coffee, as contradictory as it is). And while I'm not too big on alcoholic drinks, I like champagne.

15 - I also like biking, but, much like studying ASL and French, I don't have enough free time nowadays to really get into it again... But I try to bike every weekend I can!

16 - As a kid, I was in singing classes! I really enjoyed it and was pretty decent at it, but nowadays I do it just for fun. Love singing and listening to music around the house while doing other things.

17 - I have eight tattoos on total: Flower sleeves on both arms (featuring a clock among the flowers on the left arm and a bird on the right), music player symbols on the left side of my chest, "keep going" on the right side, an anchor on my upper back, a sun and a crescent moon on my lower back, a sea monster's tentacles going through my right hip and a paper plane on my left ankle!

18 - I also have a bunch of moles. On my face, on my back and on my chest. I used to be embarrassed by them, but nowadays, not nearly as much.

19 - I have been dyeing my hair blonde ever since college. I'm actually a brunette! I like being a blondie, but I'm considering going back to my roots... My hair is screaming for help. [He goes back to being a brunette and lets his hair grow after the events of Escape]

20 - Oh yeah, speaking of college... I have a Law degree. And am working on this field. Ya-hoo... Unfortunately, I needed a more lucrative career to support my family. But my long-term life goal is to be able to quit and live from art! And I like to believe I'm almost there.

21 - I pierced my ears in college too! I usually only wear my lucky sun earrings, but if I'm feeling fancy, I can go with a larger one.

22 - I considered becoming an English major for a while, but didn't happen either.

23 - I have a weird love for plaid jackets (of any color, but especially blue ones) and grungy bracelets. If you wanna give me anything that's wearable, going with either of these is the safest bet! Can't ever have enough of these!

24 - My favorite animals are octopuses (I had an obsession with sea monsters as a kid and this love never really died) and peacocks (they're just awesome)!

25 - My lucky number is sixteen, because my birthday is on February 16th, and because if you put "Félix Victor" together, there's a sixteen in Roman numerals right in the middle: XVI!

26 - Also, I'm 30 as of 2024, and... It's terrifying, to be honest. Buuut I'll find comfort on the fact that I look like I'm 20, hehe.

27 - This one will be hard to explain, but... I really like the sun. From summer to sunflowers to sun imageries... I like the sun. And all because of my dad. It's a long history, but yeah.

28 - I have a younger sister, her name is Alice! She's in college right now, she's History major! And... She's my pride and joy.

29 - And I also have five younger cousins: Ariel, Rafael, Leon, Joyce and Mercedes! I love them all, they're like my siblings. [Joyce is actually my Sunflower listener!]

30 - I... Have a... Weird relationship with my mom. It has been getting worse these last few years... Ah, nevermind, I shouldn't have brought this up.

31 - I had three relationships in my life... Well, three and a half, if you count that high school fling, but I digress: My first boyfriend lasted, like, half a year of my freshman year in college. It was nice, we just realized quickly that neither of us were serious. And my second boyfriend... Ergh. Tristan. We began dating in my junior year, and had a pretty messy break-up right after my graduation...

32 - ...But, nearly a whole decade after that, he sent me a DM on Instagram asking me how I was, and I mistakenly thought he became a decent human being. Hell, he was the one who got me my current job. He works in the Marketing department and was kind enough to tell me that Legal was hiring. I thought that we could at least be friends again, but... He's still a pain in the ass, at the end of the day. And still wants me back. ERGH...

33 - ...But, actually, I should thank him for that. Ironically, by trying to get back with me, he got me my third and current boyfriend... And... I won't talk too much about our relationship, but... This is the happiest I've ever been with someone. I mean it.

34 - Ok, how do I say this? I... Have been told that I... Have a pretty high libido. Or, if you want to be meaner, I'm a horny bastard. I... Will not elaborate if that's true or not. [It Is Literally Canonical]

35 - But even if I WAS a horny bastard, I'm a romantic at heart, believe it or not! I like being swept off my feet! I like flowers! I like cheesy pick-up lines! I like cuddles, god, I really like cuddles... Anyway.

36 - I'm a petite lil' guy. I'm 1m69cm tall... Or 5'8ft.

37 - I have ADHD. I was diagnosed when I was 20. I've been taking meds to help with my lack of focus, and it really has been helping.

38 - I also have insomnia. It isn't as bad as it was a few years ago, but it still sucks.

39 - My favorite song of all time is "Don't Stop (Color on the Walls)" by Foster The People!

40 - My favorite movie of all time... It's a tie between Footloose and Burlesque.

41 - My favorite animated movie of all time is Ponyo!

42 - My MBTI is ENFP, my Enneagram is 2w3, and I'm an Aquarius!

43 - In my opinion, my biggest strengths as a person are that I'm pretty charming, I can get along with nearly any kind of person (given enough time), and that I'm notoriously hard to piss off. As long as you're not messing with my loved ones, it takes A LOT to make me actually angry.

44 - And my weaknesses... Well, I let people get away with stepping all over me pretty frequently... And I'm very restless. And I don't mean only physically, I mean like... Mentally. I feel like I'm a shark: If I stop moving, I'll die, y’know? Oh, I've been told that I can be pretty shameless and a bit nosy... And, welp. I... Can't really deny that.

45 - I hate the cold. I hate winter. I hate snow. Fuck you, northern hemisphere.

46 - I really like sitting on the floor, ever since I was a little boy. It just... Grounds me. No pun intended.

47 - My favorite color is blue, but yellow and orange are also lovely... And I've been getting real fond of red these days. Hehe (Can't believe that it took me this long to say my favorite color, we're on fact 47th...).

48 - I'm a dog person! I never got to have one, though...

49 - I, not-so-secretly, really like cute things. I may or may not have a big octopus plushie on my bed. And may or may not love Pompompurin and Gudetama.

50 - I'm overall pretty confident on my looks... Except for my smile and my laugh. My ex-boyfriend (Tristan) once said that my smile is wide enough to be scary, and my mom said that my laugh is too loud, and I've been restraining myself from truly smiling and laughing out loud in public ever since. But I tend to let go when near people I trust.

51 (bonus!) - I have a very sensitive neck... Now, if I see it as a good thing or a bad thing... Depends on what your intentions are... If you know what I mean.

52 (bonus!)² - I'm also pretty great at typing. My words per minute game is insane, modesty aside.

53 (bonus!)³ - I... Can be a little bit jealous when I'm dating someone. I was never a pain in the ass about it, I mostly just sulk in silence, but... Yeah. It's my toxic trait.

[hypnoneghoul]

Can you give advice on storywriting? I love the idea of it but I cant do it properly?

Struggling with wording and like how to make each character their own/how to make a well written character??

Aandd how do I know what information to keep and what to tell? I always rush to tell things and I struggle with "show dont tell"

And pacing lmao😭 I dont know how to pace my stories well

You seem to be really good and I read your book (I litterally.. tried to learn polish for the sake of reading it lmao;;; its so good) and a few of your stories too.. any tips would be appreciated

first of all, oh my gosh, I'm literally honoured hshshsh you tried to read my book??? gonna break down right here pleaseee thank you😭

okay I'll try to get to it as well as I can, I hope it'll help at least a bit. you can always message me or send more asks <3 under the cut because its long

making the character be good, have a personality that's actually theirs is probably the hardest thing in writing. it's a bit easier in fanfiction than original work because you see them acting on stage and you see the headcanons so you have a base for it, let's say. but it's still hard. id say there are three ways of approaching this. going off vibes, projection and careful scheming and planning.

going off vibes would be just "okay he does on stage that, so i think he'd act like that off stage", pretty simple, going mostly with your guts yk

projection can go a long way. two ways actually. you can write a character that similar to you or you can write a character that is something you're lacking. of course you can mix it all, but thats the best i can describe it. my rain is me, my dew is me, my swiss and mountain is what i wish i had. caeril is me, neithan is me, etc.

careful scheming and planning is also a good way but if done wrong the character is not gonna feel real, its gonna be dry and just fake. what i mean by that is finding a character sheet with physical characteristics as well as personality traits and thinking it all over, carefully planning what you want the character to be. i myself don't do that, it feels too... artificial for me. if used correctly, tho, it can really slay because then the character can be very well thought over

you gotta try different things, u dont have to write a big 10k word fic right away. you can if you want of course but id say start with one shots, make them your character sheets. do some character study, create them and then put them into a biger picture. it takes time and practice, as evereything

the thing with show dont tell is also a thing of practice. theres no rules as to what info you should keep and what is unneccessary. show dont tell doesnt mean just show, never tell. telling isn't wrong, but writing should put the reader's brain to work, they should be seeing what you saw when you were writing. the best way to do this is basing on the senses. when writing a sentence and you doubt if its necessarry, ask yourself "okay if i was a reader what does this sentence give me? does it give me anything? what senses does it influence? does it help me paint the scene in my brain?". gotta go with feeling and overtime youlll find the perfect balance between showing and telling descriptions and that'll be your style. i make my works pretty descriptive and easy to imagine for the readers because i started with tolkien. i aspired to be like him which is of course impossible but slivers of his writing style can be seen in mine. one of those slivers is rich descriptive imagery

pacing the stories is also really hard. main rule is to not make it boring, but how to achieve it? lmao its not that easy fr. if you do an oneshot you can keep a standard introduction-main part-conclusion structure. first paint the situation, paint the place where this is happening. main part should be the longest, this is what IS your work, the most important thing. conclusion can be slow and short. tell the reader how the main part of the text changed something from the introduction, just nicely close it out. of course you dont have to, we love open endings but this is the easiest thing, id say

with bigger fics, multichapter, go wild. introduction is important but you dont have to put in on the beginning. you can start mysteriously and explain what the fuck its about in te 3rd chapter or even at the very end. build some tension but also give the reader a moment to breathe. the longer the text the more possibilieties you have but overdoing it is not good either, plan it, sketch a storyline. as everything, its a thing of practice and finding your style

and doing all that never forget about the technical bits. good story that has a terrible formatting automatically becomes a worse story because its not nice to look at. learn the proper ways to format a dialogue, work on punctuation, dont forget to capitalize (says me without a single capitalized letter and the worst grammar punctuation and typos in this whole post lmao im trying to type it in quickly sorry). dont be afraid of clicking enter, make space. formatting can also be helful in building tension, short sentences do that. you can highight an information by putting the sentecne with it alone in a line. a lot of things, also style, but you still should keep to the actual rules. treat your work as something great, dont do it half assed. treat it like it'd be supposed to be published, yk?

okay im done this is so long ugh i hope anything here is at least a bit understandable sorry but also if u or anyone have any more questions feel free to hit the ask box/dms hehehe

[kowaindar0u]

👫 (Yuichi with either Saseki or Nagasone; or Taikyuu with either Nagasone or Yamatonokami. pick whichever :'3) ((@zantedeschia-praesul))

[ Send a 👫and I’ll write four headcanons I have about our muse’s relationship ]

This got long so I'm putting in a cut lol

Yuichi & Saseki:

I know we briefly mentioned it so far but I really love the idea that Yuichi will/would have so much fun just sitting and painting with Saseki LOL jfjsjf like... Even if Yuichi is definitely not a painter, I think Yuichi would really like the casual just... Hanging out, maybe having a drink, and just painting, like no pressure or anything, just vibing. Maybe learning something from Saseki, maybe just doing their own thing

Yuichi thinks Saseki is like... so cool lol. Like a peer who has done and accomplished and overcome so much and hasn't seemed to lose his marbles yet lol. He only hopes he can be as competent and resilient should he face something tough.

I think eventually they'll get close enough that Yuichi can try and joke around with Saseki LOL. Like right now, he likes him a lot, but he's still like ... "Oh, we haven't known each other that well yet, I don't want to embarrass myself lol" but eventually... We'll see.

Maybe this isn't a headcanon so much as something I think would be cool but like. Their citadels joining forces sometime to take on the HRA or something, almost like a crossover episode, or...like...idk... Professor X and Magneto joining forces LMAO

Yuichi & Nagasone (doing some cause I can't resist):

In tandem with one that you wrote, I think Yuichi would very much go for the hands, especially when stressed or overwhelmed. Like, he's not the best at showing affection outright, but with some of his toudans he's gotten comfortable enough to reach out his hands. And Nagasone has big, strong, warm ones lol. Catch him gripping poor 'Sone's fingers real tight when something happens

Yuichi is very conscious of the fact that Nagasone lets him lean on him, can witness some of his less proud moments, and is always looking out for him, and I think he tries to take extra care to do the same for Nagasone when he can. Making sure he eats enough, rests enough, is handling things alright-- naturally what he does for any toudan, of course, but ... What I mean is he wants to take care that he isn't returning the favor, and not taking advantage of that thoughtfulness.

Taikyuu & Yamatonokami:

Taikyuu finds Yamatonokami so annoying. He's so... nice, and usually pretty cheerful, and kind of an airhead sometimes. God forbid Kashuu be away or something-- I think Taikyuu might not be far down the list for people to bother.

However. As different as they might be in many regards, the two are similar in their ferocity on the battlefield, and this is probably what makes Taikyuu the most proud to share a name with him. They probably get along the best/Taikyuu admires him the most, when they're both covered in blood and going a little apeshit lol

Also as annoying as he finds Yams, he's one of the few other toudans that I think Taikyuu would let intrude on his space (even if begrudgingly lol). He could come in to his room or sit beside him on the roof or engawa without much of a fuss, besides maybe a half-hearted "what do you want?". Especially if Yamatonokami was feeling down or something, he's like... Fine.

I don't think Taikyuu would realize how much he likes (loves) and appreciates Yams until he's gone away on kiwame 😭 he's already a bit lonely waiting for... Spear(TM), but Yams being gone is like... 'There goes the one person I never had to TRY and be close to', y'know? I'm emo now thinking about it 😭

Bonus: if Taikyuu were in toumyu too the Yasusada bros would both be doing flips all over the stage together lol it would be amazing

[wannaeatramyeon]

Hello, I was passing by here to talk about a dream I had.

I was in the Lookism universe and for some reason I sat next to Jerry Kwon at school (HE HAD HAIR), besides that I was kind of his love interest, totally in my dream Jake shaved it in vacation and we hadn't seen each other in a long time, and when I saw him without hair I stopped liking him ): (which is weird because I like Jerry in real life), and he knew it because I had told him that I would never fall in love with someone without hair, the rest of the dream was him and trying to "win me back" and in the end we became boyfriends, I also introduced myself to Big Deal for the first time (it went a bit wrong because on the ground I had a dog named Jake and because of that I was simply unable to fully respect Jake, I respected him as a friend, not as someone important on that street)

I don't have any friends who like Lookism but I thought it would be a good idea to make this "note" to you, I thought you might like to listen/read my less smokey dream.

PS: I'm not an English speaker and I'm using a translator, sorry if I didn't understand.

-🐱🦈

What in the fever dream- Don't worry, this made perfect sense.

Damn you're brutal. You would never fall in love with someone without hair?! How did he try and win you back? Did he try and grow a full head of beautiful locks, then your ran your fingers through it and realised he was the one? Oh Jake would absolutely love dog Jake, and the disrespect lmao. He'll probably find it a breath of fresh air tbh.

Lol... yes. I just don't have much to say on it because wtf is this plot. Why are they introducing even more characters idgaf about. There's a lot of convenient exits and cliffhangers with Jinho, no?

@marysgirlb0ss oh I had to google BSD but yes we do be loving women here. I don't think I currently have the brain capacity for anything apart from JJK lol.

'he also has depth, personality, goals, capabilities, and cares about more than just pussy.' Say it louder for PTJ and his company over in Seoul please!

PTJ was less miserable in the early days imo. I'm not really sure what happened to have such a downturn? I get turning it into a full on action manhwa but the female characters...

Tbh, the one I'm still taken the most aback by is Gyeoul from HTF. Her body is less...egregious than the newer Lookism panels but she's painted as such a lil sister that suddenly seeing her with the new S2 proportions took me OUT.

I have seen some fun gender bending fanart tbh of Gun/Goo! Actually I'm surprised why PTJ doesn't go down this avenue more with new characters? That should surely attract his key demographic right.

[binarybitex]

Since today is appreciation day, I obviously had to send something in ^^ This is going to be really long because I have a lot to ramble about -w-

Let's start with the obvious. Cardboard Castle. I FUCKING LOVE IT!!! I feel so lucky to have been graced with an over 100k-long slow burn with my favorite pair. You had my ass checking the tag every day to see if it had gotten an update. Every chapter is amazing, but 4 and 5 have to be my favorite. Something about them is just… idk. Maybe it's because I absolutely love carnivals and go to them every chance I get, and the way you described them it just made me feel like I was reliving them. Plus the corn maze scene?? Dawg you had me feeling like Sebastian thinking “Just kiss him!!” The fact that it’s not really a date, but totally is. Just reading it makes me feel so festive, no matter the time of year. Thinking about it now I have the urge to make some apple cider. With all the inspiration I get from it: here’s a little mood board based on it!

As for chapter 5, I really just enjoyed the dialogue at the end. The vibes are also immaculate. I can enjoy a good angsty fic like the next guy, but David and Max just bonding with each other and being mundane makes me feel so soft. The dialogue really felt like two people just going over old memories. In your author’s note, you mentioned it would be a boring chapter, but I feel like it was anything but boring. Whenever I want to read something fluffy, I always go back to that chapter. Plus what Max did to Charly was hilarious. I don’t have as much to say about this one as I did chapter 4, but nonetheless, I love it!! To be honest, it was after reading chapter 5 that I really got into writing and decided to upload my work/become more active in the maxvid community as a whole.

And onto Heart Hallow ;D I don’t usually find myself getting into OC projects, but when webtoons recommended it to me, I was like “I’ll give it a go” AND I’M GLAD I DID BECAUSE AJDGWMEOWHFE. I adore the characters, the drawings (particularly the coloring you do for each panel!), and the little stories they go through each chapter. I can tell so much love went into it from just seeing how you talk about it when asked. Kara is up there as one of my favs (yes because she’s Aroace but it has a good personality!! I just like seeing Aroace characters >w>) but Lewis and Zeke are my top too. On several of my assignments, I have Z + L scribbled on them surrounded by hearts. It has driven my friends crazy trying to figure out who they are LMAO.

And just like I do with all my favorite media, I had to insert my OC in there somewhere :3 So, Spencer! I had a lot of fun filling out her card and doing the little edit. She managed to sneak her way into employment at HH (I’m not creative, please just accept this.) and is one of the housekeepers. So two things about her. One, she’s an artist. She does a lot of landscapes/portraits. And two, she’s super messy. Which is why she has a bunch of paint all over her! She’s good at getting it out though.

Anyways, the reason that she has paint all over her is that she noticed a lot of the walls at the hotel needed to be touched up, and since she’s really good with matching colors (make-up artist), she used what paint the hotel did have to create the color needed to re-paint the walls. Then she heard about the old murals that used to be on the walls (probably from Lewis) and was like, “Wait a second. I can paint landscapes. I should do that!” So she got (dubious) permission from Mr. Wright and got to painting! She does it whenever she has time. Mr. Wright seems like he wouldn’t care, cause free art. So yeah. She does a lot of painting so constantly dirty, much to Lewis’s annoyance. And every holiday she gives all her co-workers paintings because it's cheap and easy.

And some doodles :> Not the greatest artist but I like to think I’m funny.

She suffers from having bad taste in men disease :( Her two friends, Ava and Mia run a bakery and anytime they have leftovers they give them to her. If she has anything left from that she’ll take in with her to share the next day. She is also super tall (6’5) because it's funny to insert her into a show/movie/comic and have her be the tallest person there. I also had another meme in mind but I don’t think I’ll finish it in time so be prepared for a random meme in your DMs one day.

And that’s it. Sorry it’s so long, I just want to make sure I say everything on my mind!! You’re super cool and I love your stuff and keep up the good work :3 Have a great day!!! (again your art is really nice to look at ok bye)

hi omg!! this is the most pleasant thing to open my phone up to and I just have to thank you for taking the time to write all this to me! 🫶

I'm beyond elated you've loved cardboard castles as much as me. it's my baby, and chapters 4&5 are my favorites too! I LOVE the moodboard!! omg!! srsly you did such an amazing job with it!

and Spencer is adorable !! I had a feeling you might have been coming up with an OC 👀 she'd fit right in with the cast. love how tall she is... the fact that she's taller than lewis is just 🤌and we're definitely missing a creative personality type at Heart Hollow! (for now. a new character gets released soon towards the end of book 1. she's an eccentric artsy kinda woman herself!)

your art is so cute, I love your style!! and the fact you filled out an employee sheet for spencer makes me so happy 🫶

have a lovely day and I hope that you'll send some more stuff my way! my asks are always open :-)

(btw ur ask totally made my day!!!!)

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

So few hours later, took 5 MELATONIN MEDS and I'm STILL awake. What is this?? Like atp they must have been mints or smth, cause theres NO WAY I should still be AWAKKKKKEEEEKRKEKKEJSHSH. I actually got so bored that I painted the jjk betta fish and hung it on my wall. Thinking of drawing Choso again, because I'm BOREDUUHHH.

Tbh I love adding an uh at the end of words to be dramatic, like sometimes someone will say something to me and I just start going "NOUHHH." "YOU'RE SO LAMEUHH" "STOPUHH", it got to the point where I'm now TYPING IT OUT.

So about the fic earlier. I apologize once again for sharing that TRAGEDY with you, I read a GENUINE REGULAR fluff with Nanami, and started repairing my interest by watching clips of him, AND IT WORKED!!!

So pookistien, how have you been? 🤔 I realize that I never actually use the asks to ask things LMAO

RAHHHHHHHHHHH 👶🎐 yk?

I MIGHT SHUT MY EYES AND FORCE MYSELF TO SLEEP IN A MOMENT, so I just would like to say that it's AMAZING that you post consistently, and that each day your writing just amazes me. I wake up and immediately go "Omg time to check on Axels account 🤞😜" ALSOALSO

ALSO, HAVE YOU EVER ACCIDENTALLY MESS UP YOUR RECENT EMOJIS?? ISTG IT MAKES ME SOOOO MADDDDUHH. Sometimes I'll just spam emojis, and all of a sudden it'll click off my recents, then PROCEED TO ADD A BUNCH OF SUSPICIOUS ASS EMOJIS. LIKE HERE, EMOJIS I HAVE ACCIDENTALLY GATHERED TODAY :💦👅🔥😩🍌🌉👴🥒🍆🍎👶🍋" LIKE HELLO?? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THERE WAS A LEMON EMOJI?? OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE BREN SIGNING OFF WITH IT SMFH.

And like ITS THE ABSOLUTE WORST WHEN I DON'T KNOW WHAT EMOJIS I USE OFTEN, UNTIL I GO TO USE IT AND THEN IT TURNS INTO A HUNT TO FIND IT. 😭

OKAY. CLOSING MY EYES NOW.

XOXO 👽(🍋??)

melatonin is just candy atp like i swear it doesn’t even work

to be dramatic is to be free i support adding uhhh to the end of ur words!

god bless u found the fluff u were looking for🙏 all is right in the world 🙏

LMFAO ITS FINE U DONT HAVE TO ASK THINGS TO USE THE ASK OPTION I LUV HAVING CONVOS OR JUST HEARING ABOUT UR DAY OR SMTH !

i hope u actually fell asleep this time 🙏🙏 AND THANK UUUU if i didnt post consistently id probably explode

yes… i fear i do that all the time when trying to look for an emoji i like or smth so i start pressing random ones n then they r all messed up sigh.

SLEEP WELL!

[moni-logues]

I think I understand what you mean about true crime, it's like the industry romanticizes it, right? I also don't like the way it's told/popularized by the media in a way. That whole Dahmer documentary on Netflix and everyone transforming/dressing like him and falling in love with Dahmer was kind of disgusting. But I want to study psychology someday, so it's something that kind of appeals to me.

Yeah, I saw Dexter. I think Dexter and Hannibal are like: 101 Popular Psychopaths You Should Know.

And yeah, I meant like a reader x member story that's not told from the reader's point of view. But I've also never read anything with a third-person narrator. I miss that when I read fics instead of books. I'm sorry, it's just that English isn't my first language.

About uni aus… it's not that I don't like it completely, you know? It's just something that doesn't make me want to read, you know? I find it a bit… silly, BUT I still read it, even if I don't like it that much, I think that even if I don't like it, I can still get something out of the story that I can enjoy or learn from. And sometimes it's something you learn to like over time,

me from five years ago would say: who reads fantasy? what's the point? is it to escape yourself and your boring capitalist life?

I've read a lot of fantasy nowadays and would probably say to the me of the past: What's the big deal? girl, what's the big deal with YOU? try reading, have fun even if you don't like it or hate it. And what I'm talking about… I love to read things I hate just to torture myself... yes, I'm that weird.

but, of course, your case is different, you don't like/love this kind of type of reading/trope

That said, I'm reading After Hours by @archivedkookie. It's uni au! but I also love basketball and I love Yoongi so… it's the best of both worlds.

If you liked Hali's Angel, try Obsidian's Yoongi, also by Hali (I'm sus to talk about it, I've read it a hundred times). Hali challenges you with what you don't like? 😁😁 She's good, right? 🤪 And now that I realize I misspelled it, it's @pennyellee.

Thank YOU for interacting with me, I know you're busy and I really love interacting with people and getting to know them better. -lilshy

girl, istg, I am the least busy person in the world lmaoooooo I have NO social life in the city I live in so my weekends are just me on my one lol I was supposed to be painting my bathroom as it's been replastered but the plaster hasn't fucking dried yet so I've done nothing. I got out of bed at noon today 😅😅

and yes that Dahmer shit is exactly the thing I'm talking about. it's fucking gross and there's a lot of true crime stuff where victims' families are like... very much still alive (or even victims themselves depending on the crime) and I find it kind of weird and gross that people are so fucking rabid about consuming content and getting excited about like.... the worst experiences of people's lives y'know?

haha I have grown out of hate-reading! now, if I don't like something, I give up, or I skim very quickly to see how it turns out. but I don't want to waste time on things I don't enjoy. life is too short and too difficult and too miserable already y'know? i need to spend time with what I like.

I feel like I might have seen After Hours on my dash but I've not read that either! I have so many fics in my likes right now waiting to be read that it's going to start giving me anxiety lol but I will bear it in mind when I've got through some!

and honestly, all of Hali's masterlist (that I've not read already) is on my tbr list. she's a prolific bitch (affectionate) lmao 🤣 AND Jai @gimmethatagustd

[kibaems]

Bias Tag Game

Tagged by: @foxpuppylove thank u!!!!!!!! i love these little games 💕

Rules: you're going to pick 10 of your biases (or as many biases as you have and then fill in the rest of the spots with idols you like) and number them 1-10, then answer the questions below. try not to look at the questions before you make your list!

Tagging:

As always: no pressure; if this isn't your thing, feel free to just ignore ♥

Bias List:

key, shinee

kyungsoo, exo

wooyoung, ateez

nayeon, twice

mingyu, seventeen

somi, somi

seonghwa, ateez

taemin, shinee

seulgi, red velvet

dokyeom, seventeen

Questions and answers below!

1. Between 7 and 5, who did you bias first?

mingyu~ i've been with svt since debut!

2. Between 2 and 6, who are you more attached to?

oh.... OH..... hmmm..... as a libra i should have realised this would be a difficult little game lolol i think i have a deeper emotional attachment to kyungsoo and his music as i've been with him for longer but i have a more..... big sisterly protective attachment to somi as i've seen her grow up all the way from p101!!!! stream fast forward!!!

3. If you were to spend the day with either 3 or 1, who would you choose and what would you do?

CAN I RESHUFFLE MY LIST?????? THIS ONE IS IMPOSSIBLE????? my answer is both.... BOTH!!!

realistically speaking key would probably think i'm a loser but in an ideal world where i wasn't we would go vintage shopping and style each other goofy as hell and then do one of those wine aunt paint and sips but instead of canvases we'd be painting designer handbags.

AND

wooyo is sooooooo fun so i think i'd want to go do something like zorbing in those big hamster balls or paint balling or laser tag.... something that will bring out that huge bright laugh of his u know??? i think we're both very similar in the way we get LOUD and FAST when we're excited... it'd be a mess lmao

4. What is your favorite physical feature about 9?

i love seulgi's noooooseeeeeeeee!!! idk i've never really thought about it but maybe it stems from insecurity about my own nose that that's often my fav physical feature of a person.... 🤔

5. What is your favorite part of 6's personality?

somi is SO bright!!!! she's so goofy and unapologetic about it!!!!

6. If you were to tell 8 anything you wanted, what would you tell them?

taemin...... idk man.... probably smth so corny and overplayed like it's been a gift to be able to watch him grow into the artist he's become and to see myself grow with him even if he doesn't know the impact he's had on my life.

7. Between 1 and 2, whose closet would you raid?

call me taemin because i'll be in key's closet in a SECOND skjdnksnd

8. What is a style that you want to see 3 try?

first of all A PONYTAIL. not just a little apple sprout i'm talking full jeonghan-style. also bring back the heavy eyeliner!!!!!! fashion wise i think he always looks great so idk.... maybe seeing him incorporating more bright colours?? he does favour darker colours and tbh i think that suits him sooooo well.

9. Between 5 and 4, who are you closer to in height?

god i wish i was as tall as mingyu sdkjnsknd i'm between him and nayeon but closer to nayeon lolol

10. Between 10 and 9, whose music do you like the best?

sorry rv, but it's definitely seventeen for this one

[light-wayland]

RE: Robert and Michael

"the circle probably sided with robert because michael was known to not be much in tune with valentine..." I am not saying they didn't. Michael didn't fully agree with Valentine and therefore they wouldn't care for him as much. Robert, on the other hand, was perfectly loyal and consequently, the others chose his side by default. All of that said, they also know both of them so you cannot tell me they didn't realize Michael's perceived disloyalty cannot possibly be the only thing at fault. It's a completely different thing that they chose not to care.

"parabatai in love is not only a taboo among shadowhunters but also a criminal offense..." I have somehow failed to fully consider the implications of this so thank you for reminding me. I still think that some of the Circle members (coughStephencough) would think Robert could've handled the situation better but you are correct that more shock would come from Michael falling in love with him. At the time.

I do believe that after ~20 years of exile/punishment/character growth, their immediate reaction of "Michael was what??" would soon give way to "Hold on, you told him what???" Shock, however, may have exaggerated that on my part. They'd probably just be exasperated at the pair of them, especially if Robert and Michael didn't make them choose who they thought was "in the wrong." Because you are right, with the whole thing being a crime, there isn't a wrong side. There are better ways to deal with it, certainly, but Robert wasn't wrong in what he tried to do. Just in how he did it and why. (And this statement of mine can be terribly misconstrued because I'm assuming everyone reading this knows the full context of what happened so if someone doesn't please move on and just don't. Michael being gay/bi is not the problem here.) In that way, I agree that young Maryse would see absolutely nothing wrong with what Robert has done while older Maryse who has a gay son would recognize that Robert could've dealt with it better.

The whole situation is made much worse by there being two different taboos in play:

1) Michael being in love with his parabatai. As in, the actual crime. The actually valid reason for Robert to panic about Michael's feelings and also the thing where people (probably all shadowhunters honestly) would side with Robert because "What the fuck, Wayland??"

2) Michael being gay. Still a bad look before the Clave but at least it's not illegal. This is the one that makes Robert an asshole because he very much framed this as the main problem when that should have been the least of his worries. This is what Robert is ashamed of, what the more liberal (ha, liberal Nephilim in Idris lmao) would judge him for and what I think some of the Circle would eventually come to disagree with him on.

It occurs to me that canon never... address the fact that Michael's feelings were illegal?? At least I don't remember it.

Also Michael and Maryse not really liking each other very much but somehow having the exact same terrible taste is peak comedy and I desperately need someone to point it out to them.

In conclusion: I'm sorry this is so long and a mess despite having spent half an hour trying to make myself coherent.

All of that said, they also know both of them so you cannot tell me they didn't realize Michael's perceived disloyalty cannot possibly be the only thing at fault. It's a completely different thing that they chose not to care.

that's complicated, it wasn't like they had much room for guessing. i have the headcanon/personal interpretation that michael's relationship and eventual marriage with eliza was convenient to the picture robert would have wanted to paint, as neither valentine or anyone else from the circle would approve that relationship.

I do believe that after ~20 years of exile/punishment/character growth, their immediate reaction of "Michael was what??" would soon give way to "Hold on, you told him what???"

i don't think i can really see this. most people around robert didn't have high expectations for him morally wise at this point. this guy is known as a former criminal that managed to catch second highest clave rank and everyone seem to be either frightened or displeased by his presence. using alec and magnus as reference, their surprise didn't seem to involve shock at robert's attitude - they wouldn't have expected any better from robert

In that way, I agree that young Maryse would see absolutely nothing wrong with what Robert has done while older Maryse who has a gay son would recognize that Robert could've dealt with it better.

maryse's part in this is interesting, the way i see, she would right away understand how this secret was something that changed robert a lot and affected their marriage, and present day maryse would resent robert more than michael for it, because she would see that every mistake was his choice in the end

This is the one that makes Robert an asshole because he very much framed this as the main problem when that should have been the least of his worries. This is what Robert is ashamed of, what the more liberal (ha, liberal Nephilim in Idris lmao) would judge him for and what I think some of the Circle would eventually come to disagree with him on. It occurs to me that canon never... address the fact that Michael's feelings were illegal?? At least I don't remember it.

HOLD ON. this is my point of interest hehe. so, there's a trap that robert falls there: the law is not a problem, because what michael does is not illegal. someone feeling unrequited love for their parabatai is not illegal. parabatai in love is only illegal if they both pursue it.

robert's problem there is not that something would have happened to michael if the secret was exposed, because it wouldn't (except for homophobic responses, obviously), the problem was that from that moment robert would have somehow to prove to everyone that michael's feelings were absolutely unrequited and that he wouldn't/couldn't ever reciprocate them, and how would he ever prove that? i think he'd die before asking to go under a public trial by the mortal sword to swear that he never wanted michael carnally etc. getting to the point where he would have to prove it would be compromising enough. regardless of any other implications, the context was that robert was just getting over how people treated him because of his issue with the marks, and he couldn't deal with the risk of having to prove himself again for something he was very disturbed about (the possibility of reciprocating michael's feelings, because what then - nothing could ever happen between them!)

this is robert's train of thought during the scene that mention the parabatai aspect:

People would talk, they would gossip, they would suspect things. Parabatai couldn’t date each other, of course. And couldn’t . . . anything else. But Michael and Robert were so close; Michael and Robert were so in sync; surely people would want to know if Michael and Robert were the same. Surely people would wonder. He couldn’t take it. He’d worked too hard to become the man he was, the Shadowhunter he was. He couldn’t stand to have people looking at him like that again, like he was different.

And he couldn’t stand to have Michael looking at him like this. Because what if he started wondering, too?

(none of this is supposed to sound like a defense lol robert you piece of trash, you don't treat someone like that unprovoked like he did), i'm just explaining what happened and how the parabatai issue plays at it, a "of course they can't be together because that would be illegal, but it's kinda sus you know..." situation

Editing to add: we can compare it to alec and jace. it's never a problem, jace doesn’t care at all because he's sure he is straight and he doesn’t care if someone thinks he isn't. robert didn’t share this attitude because he had no faith on his own beliefs and craved validation.

Also Michael and Maryse not really liking each other very much but somehow having the exact same terrible taste is peak comedy and I desperately need someone to point it out to them.

lmao it's hilarious and i know they'd hate that

[crewofthegoldrush]

I'm feeling bad that I don't have any new art to share and probably won't for a few weeks, so to make up for it and to give myself a kick in the pants to get working on this, I want to share the full "prologue" for fool's gold 2

I don't usually like to reveal a lot of my works in progress because I really do like the surprise, but I'm okay posting this because everything is going to get a new coat of paint, it features a conversation Ive already drawn, and I'm no where near finished editing. The final print will be longer, new/fixed dialogue (I don't always remember to write Monty with her cowboy accent lmao) and more exposition but for now, I hope you enjoy a draft!

ONE

You tap the floor twice with your tail, your signal that you were finished for today, and let her help you pick yourself off the floor. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were tryin' to beat me."

Aubrey's lip turns up at the side. "Of course I'm trying to beat you."

You watch her settle against the ship's railing, familiar even on this ship that wasn't yours. You take your place next to her, hyper aware of your petulant body language. You take a swig from your flask, offering it to her after cleaning the spout with a gold glow.

She raises a brow at the metal container, eyeing it wearily, and you manage a grin. "It's just water."

Looking more at ease, she shakes her head anyway, and you let it hang limply in your hand as you fold your arms on the banister.

"Something is bothering you."

You glance at her; Aubrey has mimicked your casual position but her eyes are as intense as they always are as she simply watches you. "It's been months since we started this, Aubrey. Shouldn't I have more than the basics by now? It shouldn't be this hard, should it?"

You were certainly better than where you were when you started. But compared to her, who had picked up firearm training so well that you had very nearly finished her gun by now, you feel indignant at your slow progress.

Aubrey hums. "You don't need to be so hard on yourself. As you've said many times, your heart is not fully in it yet, right? Your magic is improving and there are plenty of regular distractions."

She was right about that - it was hard to truly focus on leisure time when the two of you were still expected to handle your regular duties, now, you suspect, under the watchful eyes of the Tains. Nevermind the fact that, with your ship still seized, you and your team were attending to various matters, both personal and necessary. You yourself had taken up bounty hunting again to keep your coin stock healthy enough, and there were days you didn't see Harper at all.

"Besides," she continues, gesturing for you to hand her your flask, and you do. "Muscle memory is one of the first things you need to train. You are not there yet, but I'm confident that you will."

She tucks your flask away. "You are too stubborn for the case to be anything else."

You grin at her backhanded compliment and the way she just stole what she probably assumed was indeed alcohol from you, something Harper would do for Demetrius. "I can always count on you to humble me, darlin'."

"Just do your homework. Which you haven't been, I've noticed," she adds with a humorous look. 

"Like you said, I've been keepin' busy."

Her gun and silencer were almost finished (as was the one Tequila begged you to make for her), but it wasn't just that - you had taken it upon yourself to keep an eye on almost everyone's business. 

Including hers.

"Speakin' of homework - have you been doin' any of those readin's?"

A few months had passed since Lohn Ender, the professor who studied all things dreams in Koranburg, had written you back to let you know he was not able to accommodate a visit, and that if you wanted more information you would need to come see him in person. A firm 'no,' considering he and the other professors were assuredly not pleased that their object of interest had been seized by another country.

But you had a back up. Arthur Weekes, Breezy's father, was an expert in his field about the planes of your world and beyond. You had reached out to him to ask for any and all reading recommendations on the subject of Dal Quor. He had responded eagerly and sent more than just recommendations but a whole crate of books as well.

Breezy had only been a little weirded out that you were now pen pals with her parents, but otherwise seemed to find the situation delightful.

You had loaded these books up in the library, telling Harper that you had faith in Mr. Weekes to be objective, and that if she wanted to pull on this thread, you would help her.

It was a hard topic to broach for the both of you. You had learned from Harper that the creatures known as the Inspired - the ones that your whole crew had seen in their dreams thanks to the proximity to that crystal - were supposed to be angelic, protecting the country of Riedra, and you firmly believe she genuinely thinks this. But she had also learned that you and your team had witnessed Dal Quor first hand and that there was nothing angelic about it. You have no doubt she believes you, and them - they did not know she was from Riedra, and have no reason to be lying about this.

It was not your place to question her handlers - far be it from you to 'splain to an assassin spy a damn thing about her own country. But the conflicting accounts was intriguing to both of you.

Aubrey leans against the railing, looking out over the docks. "Some. It's certainly strange to read about dreams. But it's familiar. I never used to have them before frequenting Khovaire, so I had to be taught how to correspond in ornoric language."

You turn your head at her sharply, shocked and immediately invested. "You've never had your own dreams?"

You watch her think that over, as if unsure what or how much to tell you. It wasn't unusual for her to speak about her past as Aubrey, but it was certainly rare and she was selectively forthcoming, compared to Harper who seemed to have less issue giving you pieces of her past so long as she was vague about it. "Mostly, no."

Her eyes dart around the deck where you two are quite alone, a motion you probably would not have noticed had you not been so blatantly staring.

Again she hesitates, but then admits, "In my country, we dream what the Inspired wishes, as you saw. They protect us from evil spirits that can take over a dream; to do otherwise is dangerous, unnatural. But I soon learned that…I've realized that this is how everyone's nights are, and that it is normal.

"When I am like this," she continues, gesturing to herself, "I can resist dreaming, should I choose to. It was a bit difficult after I lost that journal, but I still can. But as Harper, when I am with you all - I do dream more and now that I know it is normal…it is harder to resist."

You tilt your head, thinking about how seeing her dream in Dal Quor was how you knew she was alive after the mutiny. "Was it a comfort then? The crystal?"

Aubrey glances at you with a look you can't completely read, but it is pleasant. "I suppose. I find many things a comfort as Harper these days."

You grin. "It must have been buckwild for you when you first had a nightmare."

She gives a bark of a laugh, rolling her eyes. "Don't remind me. Apparently even toddlers dream and I certainly handled it like one, I imagine."

"Tell me about it?"

She rests her chin in her palm. "Like hell."

You burst out laughing. "Fair enough. So tell me this then. If you can choose to resist dreaming as Aubrey, but Harper can't - or doesn't, or however…who do you sleep as?"

It is very rare that you can take her by surprise but you see the question jolt her, her eyebrows raising, body straightening, hands dropping from her chin. Her eyes stare ahead at nothing before falling to her hands against the banister, brow furrowed in thought. You get the feeling she wants to shift. 

"I - "

The question sounded innocent on the surface but you realize the full implications of what you have just asked her to admit. Does she duck her head, pretend her doubts are fantasy, rely on what she knows as Aubrey and resists? Or does she embrace the possibility of what Harper has taught her and allows herself to dream?

Is that something you could ask her to say out loud?

Aubrey does eventually open her mouth to say something but you interrupt her.

"- I also gotta know," you say, leaning over dramatically, practically pressed against her shoulder, "d'you still sleep naked? I think that's a better question, actually."

Again you see the surprise clear on her face before her cheeks turn a touch pink and she snaps an indignant, "For Khyber’s sake, Montgomery."

But her lips turn up just enough, especially as you grin wickedly at her. She pushes your face away. "I'm never living that down am I? You will give me no peace, will you?"

Her fingers pressed against your cheek, you smirk at her. "Maybe if you'd admit it was funny as hell, I'd be inclined to forget it eventually."

Aubrey gives you - not a smile, but she certainly isn't frowning or scolding you. "In your dreams, as they say."

She straightens, pulling her hand away. "Now, if you are finished humbling me, I think I'll get some sleep. And you should as well, yes? You have a Gala to prepare for soon, do you not?"

You beam - how could you forget? "I get the hint. G'night, darlin'. Don't be late for firearms trainin' tomorrow."

"When am I ever?" She leaves you with, before nodding her good night to you and turning away.

Her hair is turning brown when you call out to her. "Hey -?"

She pivots, looking back at you and you see her face is still Aubrey's - she looks pretty damn good with dark hair.

"So - 'man of my dreams' - phrases like that don't mean much where you're from, huh?"

"No," she says simply. "But I can be taught, I'm finding."

With a shift in her stance, your flask sails towards your head with a speed and precision that takes you by surprise; by some miracle, you catch the damn thing an inch before your face.

"As can you. Good night, Sheriff."

You watch her shift to Harper, who gives you a final smile. You give her an admittedly dopey one in return, and as she walks away you think perhaps that was your answer.

You picture her with blonde hair; pretty damn good too.

--

hey look if you don't include obvious foreshadowing is it really a prologue?

Thank you for reading this preview for pure gold! I'm really excited about this one. And I'm just going to apologize now for how very mushy this fic will be, but if you've been following me all this time I have a feeling that will not be a surprise

I'm most excited for the chapter leading up to their date, which features a sort of cat and mouse game between them in a casino that was just as fun to draft as it was to play (watching the other players get actively invested in helping me was a delight I can't express) with a payoff that I still cherish & feel thankful for to this day - and it wasn't even the kiss! I really hope I do it justice

[slytherinshua]

I went on a random train of thought and I'd like you to join me ahaha. I read a fic there and thought "hmm a person to cuddle when I'm cold does sound nice" because I am literally always cold. Then (I have some strange trains of thought please bear with me lol) I was thinking about how I've just started to steal my best friend's fleece when we are out (if the 2 jumpers and raincoat that I'm already wearing aren't enough lol) and I then started to think about how I should get my own because it's a nice fleece lol, which THEN made me start to think about the fleece that Sangyeop was always wearing during the NA tour.

All that to say I can't stop thinking about how he would be so sweet and give the fleece if I was cold ahaha. He's too good for this world lol. I could see Yechan putting up a fight, but I WOULD win. He would either take pity on me eventually or I would annoy him so much that he'd give me his jumper to shut me up. I wouldn't ask Wonsang for his jumper, he deserves the world and I couldn't live with myself knowing that I made him cold. (Although he is definitely a sweetheart and would give it to me anyway, so I'd have to try and bargain with him lol). Gwangil would react in the same way my brother would I think? He'd tell me that I should have prepared to be cold, but would then still give me his jumper. (Although I could see him being a lot nicer than my brother lol)

I hope you enjoyed this random journey with me lol (and that you stay warm!! Unless you want to be cold? I won't judge ahaha)

OMG UR SO REAL I LITERALLY HAVE BAD CIRCULATION BCUZ OF MULTIPLE HEALTH REASONS AND I GET SO COLD 😭😭😭 my fingers and toes will turn blue and purple even indoors 🧍‍♀️ OMG UR A GENIUS THAT ONE FLEECE WAS SO SKDJKSJDJSKSJS

no he def would he would be super attentive too and realize when u start shivering so u don’t even have to ask he’s already draping it around your shoulders OR EVEN pulling u close to him and putting it on u as if u need help putting ur arms through the arm holes but like he just wants to do it for u :((

I could see yechan running away the second you ask but only jokingly and you’ll have to chase him. and by the time you’ve caught him the blood is flowing and you’re not even cold anymore so he’ll be like “well now you don’t need it”. BUT IN THE END HE WILL STILL GIVE IT TO YOU CAUSE HE KNOWS YOULL GET COLD AGAIN :(

YK WONSANGS ONE RLY RLY FLUFFY HOODIE LIKE OMG I COULD NEVER ASK TO STEAL THAT FROM HIM EVEN JUST CAUSE ITS SO ICONIC (and I’d feel bad). Like he’s made so many songs in that hoodie he lounges in it like lucy don’t have a ton of clothes that they wear on the day to day so if they’re not being dressed by stylists you can slowly pick up on their favourites to wear AND WONSANG AND THAT HOODIE OH MY GOD NOOOOO :(((( I feel like he would offer it to you but in the end he’d get cold as well so maybe you would do a little sheeta pazu situation 🥹🥹🥹

yeah gwangil would probably (being the realist he is) go on a little tangent abt how you never prepare for being cold despite always knows ur gonna be lmao. he’d act like he hates giving away his sweater but he rly doesn’t mind in actuality. he likes seeing you warm that’s all that matters to him 🥹🥹 but he would be proud of you if you started to dress warm enough you don’t need to borrow. I also feel like he’d hold your hands in his to warm them up for you to try to warm up your body if you were rly rly cold :((

I DID THIS WAS SO FUN HEHE I love lucy :( ALSO I TOTALLY DIDNT EXPECT THE CB ANNOUNCEMENT TO BE SO SOON I WAS EXPECTING MAYBE SEPT COMEBACK BUT ITS LITERALLY IN 2 WEEKS SO OKAY DKDJSKSK IM SO EXCITED THO IT LOOKS ETHEREAL LIKE HAZE DID I JUST KNOW IM GONNA LIKE IT :( when the haze trailer came out and i saw the clouds that yechan painted i just knew it was gonna be my fav ever AND I WAS RIGHT HAZE IS LITERALLY MY FAV TITLE TRACK 🥹🥹🥹 but i hope you stay warm too being cold is literally no fun at all </3 although i do hate summer more than winter i love sitting next to a fire under some blankets with warm fuzzy socks and a hot drink 🥹🥹 and watching kpop or a kdrama or writing while i do it its just the best ever ☹️☹️

[hooves-of-hyrule]

Hey, Zelda - Checked in on the Thundra Plateau Herd

“Hey, Zelda” is a documentation of my personal Tears of the Kingdom playthrough, told through the eyes of Link in a series of monologues.

In the brief intermission between Breath of the Wild and Tears of the Kingdom, Link and Zelda spent a lot of time together - and by that I mean, they lived together. They shared a house, shared meals, even shared a bed (though if you asked them, they would’ve told you it was for comfort and safety, and yes, they’d really believe what they were saying). Link, however, also shared stories. Old habits die hard, and after Zelda disappears, he talks as if she's there listening to him just to keep some semblance of normalcy in his life.

Note that these are incredibly self-indulgent and I fully expect no one but myself to actually care about any of these lmao.

~~~~~~~~

I had a busy day today. Discovered some sky islands where apparently Zonai youth would be challenged to freefall through a series of light rings. Not totally sure what the significance of that is, but I did get an incredibly cool outfit out of the deal. It has fabric that can attach to the arms and legs to create a sort of… wing-suit, and makes it so much easier to maneuver through the air without a paraglider. If you were here, you’d probably insist on taking it for yourself on occasion. …I bet it would look even better on you than it does on me. Which is saying a lot, by the way, because it does look very good on me. You’re missing out. Also managed to get all but two of Purah’s skyview towers activated. When you come back you’re definitely going to have to give one of them a try. It’s about the closest thing you’ll get to flying!

Second thing I did was check on the Zonai horse herd we’ve been keeping an eye on. Remember that one foal we’ve been watching especially closely? That beautiful silver bay with the dark face? She’s finally all grown up. Managed to get a hold of her and she definitely was worth the wait. I can’t wait for you to meet her, I think you’ll like her even more than Dauntless. The rest of the herd is doing well too. One of the bands has been forced to move up toward the mountain though. You know the one that stayed on that ledge? That one. Turns out the stone talus got replaced by a lynel. That was… a surprise to say the least. Anyways, when I got back to the New Serenne Stable to register Wick as my own, I noticed someone worrying over a broken wagon so… obviously I fixed it for her. Turned out she had only just gotten the wagon but somehow didn’t even know how to catch a horse. Since catching horses is pretty much my only pastime, I figured I’d grab a nice gentle one for her. Managed to find her a beautiful bay paint with a long mane… honestly I almost kept him for myself, but apparently I need to rack up more “pony points” before I can register another horse. …Rant about that later. Anyway - I gave her the horse and she hitched it up, and then she asked for my name, which I told her. Her name is… Zumi? Zuli? Something like that. Apparently the only reason she asked was because she wanted to name the wagon after the two of us. So now it’s called Zunk. I can tell she only did it because she thinks I’m attractive or something, which is… uncomfortable, but I can forgive it because Zunk is honestly the best name I’ve ever heard and I think if we ever get a dog someday it should be named Zunk. Or maybe Zenk, actually. Get it? Zenk? …no, that’s stupid. Maybe Lilda? …Lelda? Zink… Zelink… hm. That’s a work in progress.

Oh, I asked the stable owner about whatever happened to that golden horse the two of us have been working on training. Apparently she got transferred to the Hebra snowfield stable, which is just about the worst place she could’ve been transferred to. I hope she’s doing well. I’ll go check on her for you tomorrow.

~~~~~

Author's Note: Wick is one of the two-max-stat-one-almost-max-stat horses I was talking about in the notes of the prologue. Now she's a 100% max stat. She's also, really freaking pretty. And as my friend said, "omg it's discount store-brand Epona."

Also I wish the paints and appaloosas didn't have such bad stats :( Someday I'll actually keep one and just upgrade it. Today is not that day. I hope Zumi(?) likes her horse that she will literally never use.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 328: Pandora’s Box of Discourse

Previously on BnHA: DEKU TOOK A BATH.

Today on BnHA: 

Also Naomasa grew a beard. Goddamn. 

please let this be a cool chapter that plays nice with my ADHD lol

(ETA: lol I feel guilty because a lot of people hated this chapter, but I’m just happy there was a lot of stuff to make fun of, and also that I have another week to work on my backlog of meta posts since the kids were MIA.)

around one month ago?? ah, okay, so we’re gonna find out what was in that Tartarus security file huh

I love that they just randomly set the place on fire

was it necessary to do this in order to escape? no. was it a good idea to set the island they were occupying on fire while they were in the midst of still occupying it? uh. was it cinematic as fuck? fuck yeah

wow it’s a pervert!!

that’s so great that the villains set loose this fine fellow who I’m sure is definitely not a serial rapist. truly the LoV is so noble and misunderstood. they’re just trying to free society from its chains people

oh my god??!

SHANKED!!! oh my god I cheered for Stain before I realized what I was doing. time to have an identity crisis I guess

so he’s all “hey what’s going on.” which, while a respectable question, is something I personally would have waited to ask until I had put a bit of distance between myself and the fiery murder island. but that’s just my personal preference

Stain you really are tenacious I’ll give you that

“what’s the point of escaping prison if you’re not gonna be smart about it” well shit. anyways yeah you’re dead right, society is in the process of collapsing and the outside world is in total chaos, good call there

oh shit

I mean it’s not like we really expecting anything otherwise, but still. fucking brutal. I feel like these guys’ fates were decided the minute that one guy called AFO “scum” back in chapter 94. AFO is unmatched at getting long-term revenge

??

ahh, was it the security footage??

fdsdfk he’s still alive??

and he’s immediately launching into an inappropriately theatrical monologue even as the darkness closes in on him fdlfksjdlk. you know, was it ever confirmed that the other guy back in chapter 297 was Seiji’s dad? I’m just saying

very impressed that he’s still coherent enough to weigh the pros and cons before making the decision to gamble on giving this info to Stain, who at the very least has his own moral code and isn’t allied with AFO. it was definitely still a risk, but as we now know it was also the right call

what a weird alliance. so Stain tells him that he’ll give it to a just person, and the guy is all,

okay for real though I’m gonna need someone to run a DNA test on this guy. maybe it was some kind of cuckold situation?? the other guy had the family resemblance, but this guy absolutely 100% raised Shishikura Seiji and you are not going to convince me otherwise

anyway, so Stain is all,

PRISON GUARD: “???? ??????? what the hell. what the fuck does that fucking mean. I’m dying here, jesus christ, whatever man fuck you”

(ETA: I kind of feel like this might have been Stain’s last appearance in the manga, given all the fanfare. there’s not really much else he can do for the story at this point, and he seems to have gotten all the character development Horikoshi was planning on giving him. so if this really is it, hasta la vista and good riddance I guess.)

DWLFDKSLDK MEANWHILE, OUTSIDE

(ETA: I feel like this is meant to be evocative of that Sermon on the Mount painting, but in a really fucked up way lol.)

if it were me stumbling upon this scene I would just shake my head and walk right back into the flaming building. not getting involved in that mess. sorry not sorry. I’ll take my chances with the fire, especially given that it’s half-assed neutered BnHA fire lol

blah blah blah and so he decided to pass the info on to All Might -- HOT DAMN, HOLY SHIT

NAOMASA HOLY SHIT. THE APOCALYPSE LOOKS GOOD ON YOU, BOY

“I really like that facial scruff thing Aizawa’s got going on, I think I’m gonna get in on that” yes sir. “also thinking of ditching the tie in favor of the bulletproof vest look. also thinking of getting totally fucking jacked.” good lord. except I’m pretty sure that’s just body armor, but also I don’t care. anyway I should probably stop staring and actually read the fucking speech bubbles here lol

“All Might first handed this information over to Nao, and then went to see Deku, and then came back to Nao” thanks for that tidy little summary Horikoshi. we are capable of piecing events together in sequential order, I just want you to know that. but thank you

“so has Deku finally gotten a bath? also, sucks that Stain saved the day, but what are you gonna do” Nao I missed you so fucking much and didn’t even realize. how am I just now realizing that you are the perfect man

for a second I was gonna ask why Tartarus’s security systems would be cut off from the outside world, and then I remembered that’s a basic security control, and then I actually got impressed by how sensible that is. like, it’s been a while since I could genuinely say that the good guys (excluding class 1-A) did something smart. not that it helped them much in the end, but still

anyway so they’re talking about how AFO was able to coordinate the attack by communicating between his horcrux self on the outside and his ugly peanut-faced self on the inside

huh

okay you have my attention. I am taking notes here lol please continue

ah okay so he says that prior to Jakku, the transfer of information between him and his Vestige self was only one-way. but post-Jakku when Deku was in the hospital, he was able to tell what was happening inside the OFA Radical Lisa Frank Dead People Book Club Realm when he touched him. I feel like we established that before, actually. but he didn’t talk about how it actually felt, though

boy we already know this lol. yes AFO can talk with his horcrux self. and he can also communicate with his little bro in OFA too, let’s talk about that sometime why don’t we. what exactly does that imply, based on the rules we’ve established here

my god I cannot get over Naomasa and his fucking facial hair

no wonder All Might was in such a hurry to leave Deku and get back here

like I have no idea what this radio waves nonsense is but my god, people

that jawline. also so it’s a quirk, I see. except last I checked Deku didn’t have a radio waves quirk, so that doesn’t really explain his connection to AFO. but whatever, hopefully we’re at least getting closer to some kind of reveal here

(ETA: since I sometimes forget that other people’s lives don’t revolve around my theory posts, here are the two relevant links if you by chance want to know my thoughts about this.

Hagakure is still The U.A. Traitor™ regardless of whether Deku is passing information on to AFO through his psychic link, which he almost certainly is.

speaking of said psychic link, Deku is a horcrux.

just posting these now, because whenever trippy OFA stuff happens I tend to get an influx of theory asks. so hopefully this will be a bit of a time saver lol.)

-- wait, what

THAT’S what the recording was??!? holy SHIT. I genuinely was not expecting that. y’all wiretapped his fucking telepathy. fucking quirks, man. wild

AND THEY USED THAT POWER TO DETERMINE WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW, HUZZAH. GOOD SHOW

-- oh shit wait lol, except I forgot we’re not talking about 38 days from the present, we’re talking about 38 days from the date the conversation was recorded. heh. um

yeah that’s the face I would make too if All Fucking Might just casually told me we had eight days left until the end times

oh, pardon me. three fucking days

r.i.p. anyone who thought we were going to have another band arc sob. I sure hope Deku is enjoying that nap

(ETA: I realize people were hoping for a longer rest period here, but given that the man warned us all the way back in chapter 306 that we were entering the final act, you can’t really blame him too much when that turns out to be true. anyway but I do recognize that we’ve reached the point in the story where this kind of discourse is going to become a weekly occurrence, simply because there’s no possible way for Horikoshi’s actual endgame to line up perfectly with the variable headcanons of millions of fans, all of whom have wildly differing and in many cases contradictory expectations which can’t possibly all be fulfilled. anyway, so I’m already bracing myself for that lol. this coming year is going to be a wild ride.)

damn, U.A. out here looking like the motherfucking United Nations

-- is this U.A.?? I actually just realized, U.A. is four interconnected buildings, not two. wait holy shit is this Shiketsu?

wait holy SHIT

based on the overwhelmingly powerful vibes of bureaucratic incompetence, I’m thinking this really is the (future) U.N., or whatever organization it is that deals with international hero stuff

“just let them handle it themselves I’m sure they’ll be fine” yeah okay, thanks guys. appreciate it

wait oh shit did he say that it’s not just Japan?

soooo, what you’re telling me is that AFO is this close to bringing about the end of not just Japan, but the entire world, and you guys don’t think it’s a good idea to help the Japanese heroes stop him? so, genuine follow-up question: are you guys already planning your rich people exodus into space a la Wall-E, and that’s why you don’t give a fuck?? like, what??

omg international heroes

these guys are from World Hoodie Mission, right? is this Horikoshi’s way of reminding me to buy tickets

(ETA: and it worked too lol.)

WHO??? WHAT???

don’t tell me you’re introducing yet another badass new female character for me to fall in love with only to watch as you dismember them and/or blow them up, Horikoshi. I’m getting tired of playing this game my dude. don’t lie and tell me this time will be different. we’re not doing this again goddammit

noooooooooooooooooooo

god fucking dammit lmao. [sighs and rips the previous paragraph into shreds]

on behalf of Americans I apologize for our superheroes always being Like This

I also apologize because I love her already and I’m gonna be shameless about it. so fucking shameless you guys

is her fucking hair red white and blue. it is, isn’t it

this is the volume cliffhanger, 100% lol. it will take every ounce of Horikoshi’s willpower not to put her on the volume cover. he’ll have to settle for the spine or the inner cover this time because Deku VS his class 1-a superpals takes precedence. but it will be a close thing let me tell you

tbh it’s that smile that does it for me. she’s definitely All Might’s protege. get out there and show them how it’s done girl. and maybe call Salaam and BRD and see if you can’t convince them to play hooky from their governments as well. why not. world’s ending in three days you guys. “sorry, I’m busy this weekend” ain’t gonna cut it lol

so while I am not fully caught up with Vigilantes, I have read far enough to know that there’s an American hero named Captain Celebrity whose superpower from what I recall is being a humongous douchebag. and while I haven’t read far enough to know what happens to this guy, I can’t say I’m very disappointed to learn that he’s no longer the number one hero in the U.S. (actually, didn’t they kick him out and that’s why he moved to Japan to begin with?). anyway, so my thanks to Horikoshi for having a marginally higher opinion of Americans than Furuhashi, even though we have definitely not done anything to warrant said opinion lately, and you may have inadvertently opened the door to a pandora’s box of discourse lmao

(ETA: lol I went into the tags and they don’t disappoint. “why is she dressed like a flag” because she’s an homage to Captain America and Major Victory and literally every other character on this list. again, I apologize for fictional American superheroes being Like This. “oh boy another thicc waifu to make the fanboys happy” look, tumblr fandom never seems to have a problem thirsting over Dabi or Tomura or Aizawa or Nao, lol, I’m just saying. “where is Captain Celebrity” idk, probably murdered by the exploding bee cartel, let’s just be grateful for our good fortune and try not to Beetlejuice the man.)

anyway, so let’s see if Horikoshi’s recent character development with regards to making Mineta not terrible anymore will apply to other aspects of his writing as well. I know I was making light of discourse just now, but I do think the complaints about him introducing yet another new character at the 11th hour to be cannon fodder in the final battle are absolutely valid. and again, it wouldn’t be a problem if he didn’t keep maiming/killing off his female characters one by one instead of developing them and letting them kick ass long-term. but that said, I will never complain about Horikoshi adding another female character to the series, regardless of how clumsy the attempt may be. go ahead and pander away, just give us more girl power lol

anyway so we’ll see how it goes, but I think I’m gonna be optimistic and let myself hope once again, even though I’m probably gonna regret it lol. it is what it is. she is standing on an airplane just chilling for fuck’s sake. I’m only human. anyway fingers crossed

[emerald-chaos]

Daydream

**gif not mine! credit to the owner**

So, I couldn't help myself. This is a continuation of my previous Bucky fic Insomnia because I just really enjoyed the dynamic between Bucky and the reader. I had a lot of fun writing this part and I love building things up between the two of them. If you guys like this or are interested in seeing more - please let me know! I love talking with people and hearing their ideas and such.

Much love xo.

Pairing: Reader x Bucky Barnes

Word Count: 2079

Warnings: cursing, struggles with mental illness, mentions of sex (nothing entirely explicit but better safe than sorry), alcohol use, and really poorly written jokes lmao

Fingers threaded into hair.

Hot, opened-mouth kisses marking every surface of your neck.

Nails trailing down his back leaving raised, red lines in their wake.

“Oh my god,” you groaned as you let your head fall back and continued to rock your hips into the man in front of you.

Strong hands tighten their hold on your hips, sure to leave purplish-blue bruises for the morning.

“C’mon, baby,” he grunted, face buried in your neck as he helped your body to grind against his, “I got you. Let go, fuck, let go for me.”

A pair of slender fingers snapped in front of your line of sight, tearing you from your daydream and bringing you harshly back to reality.

“Hmm, what was that?” You blinked a few times before you turned your attention to the redhead who you, apparently, had been having a conversation with.

“Are you serious?” She laughed, “I’ve been talking for the past 10 minutes! I looked over and you had that far off, glossy look in your eyes. Not to mention you’re bleeding.”

A hand found its way to your lower lip and you realized she was right. You had been so lost in wet dreamland that you chewed a layer of skin off of your lip. You hoped she didn’t notice the heat rising in your face as you cleared your throat, grabbing a tissue from the coffee table.

“Sorry,” you muttered, pressing the tissue against your injured lip, “guess I got lost in thought.”

“Is it one of those flashbacks again?” She asked kindly, facial expression softening.

You nodded quickly, knowing fully well that the statement was a lie. Your gaze drifted over the woman’s shoulder to the subject of your previous thoughts. It would be easier to explain the common occurrence of your PTSD than it would be to explain that you were reminiscing on the hot, steamy, passionate sex you had the night before.

Bucky was situated across the room, leaning against the counter as he talked to Rogers and Wilson. The unfortunately tight, black, short-sleeve t-shirt he was wearing left nothing to the imagination. It accentuated every muscle of the body you had gotten to know so intimately not more than 10 hours ago. His muscular arms were crossed at his chest and he was sporting his signature scowl. Everything about the sight sent a shiver down your spine. You finally had a taste and you wanted more.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Your friend’s voice gained your attention once more.

A small smile found its way to your lips as you met her gaze again. Apart from Bucky, Nat had always been a good trauma buddy of yours. From the beginning she had been someone you felt like you could confide in and someone who would understand your troubles. Sometimes you wondered if a requirement of joining the avengers was to have a fucked up, tragic backstory.

“I’m okay, Nat.” You reassured, “Just got lost in my head again.”

“Whatever you say. Maybe the party tonight will help you get your mind off of things,” She mused as she pushed herself from the couch to stand up. She paused briefly before she turned to you again, “you are coming, right?”

“Yeah,” you snorted, “Tony actually threatened me if I didn’t go this time, so, I guess I have to.”

After the last party you skipped out on, Tony cornered you in the hallway and gave you quite the interrogation. Then he went on a spiel about how staying in your room all day and all night was bad for you and that if he didn’t know better he would think you weren’t appreciative of what he’d done for you and blah, blah, blah. Tony really was a good person underneath all that hair gel. All he wanted was to help you break out of your shell and give you the family he knew you were lacking. That didn’t mean he couldn’t be a pushy asshole.

“Good, I’ll see you there. I’m sure Barnes will too.” A devilish grin painted her lips as she watched your jaw drop. Before you had a chance to say anything she was off down the hallway.

Fuckin’ Natasha.

*******

A pile of clothes littered your bed as you slipped another dress over your form. Not once in your life had you ever been concerned about what you were wearing or what you looked like, but there was something about tonight that made you want to turn heads. Your eyes raked down your figure as you twisted from side to side, admiring the way the black dress hugged your body in all the right places. Not to mention the thigh high slit in the dress showed off probably the only body part you weren’t self-conscious about. Tony, being the theatrical and over the top man he was, once said that you shouldn’t show up to his parties if you weren’t dressed to court a royal or to bring a man to his knees. Guess you were shooting for the latter.

As you put the finishing touches on your look for the evening, you felt that familiar heavy feeling settling into your chest. Your body always had a tendency to go into fight or flight mode when you became too familiar with anything or anyone. It felt like every fiber in your body was screaming for you to retreat into sweats and stay in your room, to not allow yourself this opportunity to enjoy the people you’d grown so close to. You know what happens when you let people in.

Grief, trauma, coping - it made it really difficult to live a “normal” life. Everyday tasks are daunting, it can be next to impossible to have intimate friendships or relationships, and not to mention the intrusive thoughts that infect your mind on a daily, if not hourly, basis. Here you were, the happiest you’d been in years. You were finally in a place where you felt loved, comfortable, safe - and yet your mind was trying to self-sabotage again.

You took a moment to close your eyes and take several deep breaths. When you opened your eyes you locked eyes with your reflection in the mirror and made a pact with the girl staring back at you. The intrusive thoughts and self-doubt couldn’t continue to have a hold over you anymore. You gave yourself a small smirk and nod as you made the decision to throw caution to the wind and give the party a try. What’s the worst that could happen?

*******

Come to find out, the worst that could happen would be your competitive nature overcoming the rational, thinking part of your brain; which in turn would lead you to enter in a drinking contest. Thankfully a small portion of your pink, smooth brain was still functional enough to tell you when you’d reached your limit. Now you sat comfortably on the couch, legs tucked underneath you as you joyfully watched your friends argue.

“Dr. Banner, my friend, you are one of the most intelligent people I know. However, you are wrong.” Thor stated simply as he finished the rest of his drink.

“Thor, for the last time, water is not wet!” Bruce retorted, throwing his hands up in frustration.

You let out a loud snort before thinking, “Oh yeah, water. I should drink some water.”

Your feet planted themselves on the floor and slipped back into your pair of shoes. As you made your way to the kitchen you were pleasantly surprised by your balance and coordination, considering how much alcohol you’d consumed. Seems that drinking with Thor has done wonders for your tolerance.

While you were busy searching the refrigerator for a bottle of water, you were also oblivious to the soft sound of footsteps coming into the kitchen. After retrieving the beverage, you closed the door and turned to leave. Instead, you turned right into the chest of a figure that was definitely not there a moment ago. You yelped as you clutched a hand over your chest dramatically, your face filled with horror as though you’d just come face to face with the grim reaper.

“Jesus Christ, Barnes!” you scolded.

Bucky was holding his abdomen as he leaned back, consumed with laughter at your reaction. You huffed and wanted to be offended, but he looked so damn cute laughing that you couldn’t help but join him. You pushed his chest playfully and grumped as you hopped up to sit on the counter, opening the water to gulp about half of it down. Bucky couldn’t help but grin at your pouty state as he finished up his laughing fit.

“My apologies, sweets. Didn’t realize I’d be makin’ ya scream twice in one day.” He teased, grinning even wider as he did so.

Your jaw dropped at the comment, quickly looking around to make sure no one else was in the kitchen to hear what he had said. After seeing that the coast was clear you kicked your foot at him out of annoyance, only for his metal hand to catch it smoothly. The two of you locked eyes, motionless for a moment before he moved closer, sliding his hand from your ankle to your thigh. In the moment, you damned yourself for choosing this particular dress. The closer he got, the faster your breathing became. The contrast between his cold embrace and your flushed, warm skin sent a shiver down your spine. Abandoning the water bottle, you ran your hands up his abdomen and chest until they rested on his shoulders. Following a small nudge from his knee, you parted your legs to allow him space to stand between them. The heat in your face at an all time high as he pressed his flesh hand to your cheek.

“Haven’t been able to stop thinkin’ about you.” Bucky whispered as he stroked the apple of your cheek with his thumb. Each word that left his lips had you feeling way more intoxicated than any liquor you’d had all night.

As quickly as it started, his touch was gone and his back was turned as he opened the fridge. Before you had a chance to open your mouth to ask what the hell just happened, Tony was entering into the kitchen.

“Well, well, well. Surprised to see you here, Annie.” Tony beamed as he laid eyes on you.

Yes, Tony had nicknamed you after little orphan Annie. Yes, he also referred to himself lovingly as Daddy Warbucks. Yes, any person in their right mind would probably be offended, but you were just fucked up enough that you found it kind of hilarious.

“Wish I could say that it’s a pleasure, Tony.” You grumped back, upset that you’d been cockblocked and by Tony no less.

“Never lose that spunk, kid.” Tony winked as he turned to see Bucky retreating from the fridge with a beer in hand. “Inspector Gadget! Good to see you too.”

As much as you didn’t want to encourage him, you couldn’t help but laugh. Much to your dismay, Bucky simply raised his bottle to Tony as if to say “cheers” and padded out of the kitchen.

“He has such a way with words.” Tony teased as you rolled your eyes.

A sigh left your lips as you slipped off the counter and back onto the floor, muttering a “goodnight” before leaving the kitchen and heading back to your room. Although you wanted nothing more than to find Bucky and finish what he had started in the kitchen, you came to the conclusion that you were probably too drunk and definitely too tired.

Back in the comfort of your bedroom, you went about your normal nighttime routine. As you exited the bathroom, you couldn’t help but notice a piece of paper that had been slipped beneath your door. Grabbing the paper from the floor and plopping back onto your soft mattress, you opened it to read the note that was scribbled in black ink.

Never got the chance to tell you how gorgeous you looked tonight. Gotta say, I’m a big fan of that dress.

Sweet dreams.

- B.

When you finished the note, it felt as though you were floating on cloud 9. Even when you laid your head down and tried to welcome sleep, Bucky’s words were still replaying in your head over and over again - like they were lyrics to your new favorite song.

Turns out you were down for Bucky Barnes, and you were down bad.